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Dabihawks Fanfic Recs #4
(In no particular order)
Fic Rec List #1 Fic Rec List #2 Fic Rec List #3 LoV Found Family List
it is what it is (until it isn't) Starship_Phoenix @starship--phoenix Complete Rating: T Words: 7,811 Chapters: 1/1 Summary: Dabi hates Hawks. Hawks hates Dabi. But then Hawks surprises Dabi with a trip to the mountains. With the captive audience he's always been waiting for, Dabi lets Hawks know just how he feels about the HPSC's new "Buddy Program;" society's new alternative to life-sentences. He also discovers just how he feels about Hawks.
Notes: Everyone loves an unreliable narrator, and Dabi has no clue what is going on. Soft story, bitter Dabi, and overall lovely winter read. Star weaves a tightly written narrative absolutely worth reading.
hit and run DrAphra @draphrawrites Incomplete Rating: T Words: 11,740 Chapters: 3/? Summary: A hit and run, of all things, is what changes the course of Dabi’s life.
Notes: I have reread this fic more times than I can count. I am an enjoyer of some serious hurt + comfort in the form of amateur first aid, so Dabi struck by a vehicle and left with only Hawks to care for him is the best meal in the world, to me. Aphra writes injuries and tending to them with precision that might make some squirm but truly brings a wrecked character to life. A must-read for lovers of sad, wet rat, injured blorbos.
Kintsugi Stormysilverfox Complete Rating: T Words: 47,976 Chapters: 9/9 Summary: Dabi, person-roasting, hero-hating, A-ranked villain, is an omega.
It’s not necessarily a problem, only Hawks is fairly—hm, positively—certain that the pyro has no idea. It’s obvious what the HPSC would say. You’re an alpha Hawks, extort him, use a command on him. That was an unspoken order to honeytrap him then, since a command would only be as effective as Dabi’s affection was strong. Better not to tell them, better to pretend he hadn’t realised.
All his plans disintegrate around him when Dabi starts nesting in his apartment. Ironically enough, his biggest concern is dislodging him before he settles permanently, not exploiting him. He’s well aware that an omega will not give up their nest once it’s started, enemy apartment or no. And all without alerting Dabi to the fact that he’s even nesting at all, because Hawks has no desire to be cremated along with the other evidence once he realises.
Accidentally falling in love with him wasn’t supposed to be in the cards. Hawks fucking honeytrapped himself, like a moron. This was exactly what they taught you not to do.
Losing him to the Commission isn’t supposed to happen either.
Notes: Listen to me: are you nervous to read A/B/O? Open your mind to Safe For Work Omegaverse. This fic is soft, comforting, and honestly? I’m due for a reread. Like the title suggests, this fic is healing. A story to put you back together again, Kintsugi is a comfort read.
as we lay among the forsythias Goldtinted Incomplete Rating: M Words: 92,961 Chapters: 4/5 Summary:
“You used to love blabbering on and on. What happened to you, Keigo?” It’s the second time Touya has ever used his real name. He’s not as startled as he was the first time he heard it. The element of surprise is gone, but Hawks still feels something small and sharp stab at his chest. He wonders what Touya’s endgame is here. “I fought in a war.” He says simply, shrugging. Touya laughs again, louder this time, a cold, harsh sound that reverberates across the barrier and around the room. The guards behind Touya start to move forward, and Hawks can sense shuffling beyond the door behind him. “Well guess what, birdbrain? I did too.”
As the dust settles after the war, amidst social turmoil and societal reform, between three centimetres, seventy-eight square kilometres, and a dance of thirty odd steps, Hawks and Touya slowly recover. In the process, they find themselves falling in love again.
Notes: I totally thought this fic was complete until I started writing this rec. I’m shocked - I felt so fulfilled by this story that I just… imagined it must have ended. Well, still go read and support this fic and give the author lots of love for a wonderful post-canon that lives in my heart forever. Also, the narrative structure is so cleverly crafted and worth reading for that alone, not to mention the arc Dabi and Hawks take in this fic.
One more time (and maybe you’ll get it right this time) juurensha @juurensha Complete Rating: M Words: 19,677 Chapters: 3/3 Summary: “…sure,” Dabi says finally, “Do you think the answer is still with you joining the League of Villains?”
“Of course it is! Or else why do I keep rewinding to this moment here?” Hawks spits out, flinging his arms around. “But you know what? This time I need a break. I’m just going to go on vacation, and both you and the Hero Commission can go to hell, and maybe this time I’ll be able to tell what resets everything. Or who knows, this is what solves everything.”
Notes: More than just moving, this fic is a technical achievement. Not a spoiler–this is a time loop fic told from the POV of Dabi, despite Hawks being the one looping. I’m a fan of interesting story structure, and this one certainly delivers.
Minutes to Midnight Bacchant @transhawks Complete Rating: T Words: 51,645 Chapters: 7/7 Summary: "Something’s wrong," Hawks thinks again. "And this isn’t the right place to figure it out."
An unknown quirk that only shows itself as a mysterious tattoo on his arm sends Hawks careening into different worlds, all seemingly designed to make him ask himself what if he'd made different choices in his life. In each life, he learns a bit more about himself, and who he could have been, and gets closer to answering the biggest question of all: just who is Takami Keigo?
Or
Takami Keigo will travel to different dimensions, break out of simulations, challenge the established rules of quirk science, and bring a man back to life before going to therapy.
Notes: I tricked you! This one isn’t dabihawks! I’ve lured you in with sweet, sweet dabihawks only to show you this fantastic Hawks-centric fic. I know. Detestable. Well, if you’re reading this list, I assume you enjoy dissecting Hawks like a frog in a middle-school science class, and this fic does just that. Bacchant is a master of writing meta about our favorite murder bird and does so here through a collection of alternate lives he could’ve lived. The journey winds in ways you might not expect, and the ending those twists deliver will stick with you. For fans of Hawks, definitely give this fic a read.
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Lastly, after fives rec lists, a shameless self-plug: I'm Haslenoot on ao3, if you'd like to take a glance at my work, as well <3
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Don't forget to leave those kudos, comments, and subscribe where applicable! And if you feel so inspired, fic recs are a great way to engage with fandom, support your peers, and preserve fandom. While I love searching ao3, it can be a lot for people new to a big fandom! Many of readers enjoy rec lists, but often they can be hard to find or locked within Discord servers. Fic rec lists are findable through search engines. I've read fics off lists that are years old, which is, in a way, an archive of the fandom at that time. So make lists! Post them publicly! Hype up your friends!
And as always, happy reading!
#dabihawks#dabihawks fic rec#bnha fic rec#fic recs#fic rec#toukei#takami keigo#keigo takami#todoroki touya#touya todoroki#mha#bnha#pls lmk if i missed any tags!!#i'm not sure who all has a tumblr
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dealing you this like radioactive contraband before I go back to pretending I can't draw
#calla for beauty + obvious reasons / marigold for cruelty and jealousy#and because tumblr has rules I'll just let you know there's another version. And that's it. That's all you get on that#gladiator 2#emperor caracalla#LOOK I. I'VE BEEN SITTING HERE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES WITH THIS POST#TRYING TO COME UP WITH AN EXCUSE#I HAVE NONE. THERE IS NO EXCUSE. THIS IS INDULGENT.#GUY FUCKS I CAN'T HELP IT#...... I again do not think we have an art tag here. uh.#I'll figure that out later maybe.#I'm playing time so I don't have to hit post on this.#Tumblr if you take this down for the amount of nonbinary-presenting chest I will actually riot#I've never struggled with folds this much I deserve to have this at least stay up until I realise what I've done and delete it#it's been 20 minutes now I'm pretty sure and I still haven't pressed post#I'm just thinking about all the followers who came here for something that DEFINITELY wasn't this#oh well#here goes
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genuinely think it's good and healthy to follow at least one person in each of your fandoms who reblogs good gifsets but has just...absolutely dogshit takes on the show, or who ships that ship you despise. keeps things fresh. keeps things grounded. you gotta stay humble
#lauren feels things#fandom#this is mostly a joke post#obviously create the experience on tumblr that yOU want#you are not obligated to do any fucking thing on this website#but like....there are a few people I've been following on my other blog#(my real and anonymous one where I do most of my reblogging/fandom stuff)#and I've been following them for YEARS#or they're mutuals from the fandoms I've written fic for#and they just post the most out of pocket shit#or they ship ships that totally squick me out#or - the most annoying sin of all to me -#they post sanctimonious explanations about how the creators/actors/whatever#really feel THIS way about this particular thing#and all you other fans are wrong#(and like......no they don't. unless that actor or writer has said that#you have no idea they think that. also it doesn't matter what they think.)#but I'm honestly not kidding when I say this makes my personal fandom experience better#bc a) some of these people are just pals I disagree with!#and b) none of them are - like - toxic or anything#there's a certain kind of fandom discourse I do not tolerate#these people are mostly just kind of silly sometimes about stuff#and ultimately harmless#but it helps me understand a fandom better#and the fact that I've been doing it for like a decade now#means that i truly never get offended or hurt or feel any kind of way#when I see a bonkers take on something#bc I'm just like 'oh sure you're wrong but whatever good for you seems like you're having fun'#and sometimes ppl in fandoms take things SO PERSONALLY!#and it's okay that some people who make art you like or amazing gifsets feel differently about the thing you both love
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horizontober 2023 | 3: recognize
greetings, dr. sobeck. you are clear to proceed.
#horizontober2023#horizon zero dawn#hzd#aloy#hzd all-mother mountain#so i saw this prompt and this scene is what i thought of#and i was like oh i can put my new gifmaking powers to use!#aaaaaand it turns out to be like the hardest scene to fit under tumblr's 10mb limit bc of all the glow and the gradients that causes#(i'm still learning/experimenting - and using only free software - so i'm sure a seasoned gifmaker could do/has done much better T_T )#i'm not particularly happy with the coloring in the first two either but i decided i'm *done* lmao#also apparently i'm too lazy to add subtitles sorry i think y'all still get the idea#gifs#hzd gifs#finally thank u to the person on youtube who uploaded the cutscenes bc i sure as heck didn't have a video or a save in the right spot
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Colin Baker makes some excellent faces as an unnamed town hall clerk, assisting Frank Marker with his case in Public Eye: The Man Who Didn't Eat Sweets (5.9, Thames, 1971)
#fave spotting#colin baker#doctor who#classic doctor who#six#public eye#the man who didn’t eat sweets#1971#thames#classic tv#im sure someone will have grabbed images from the dvd and cleaned them up nicely and so there is almost certainly a better post#floating out there on tumblr; after all‚ Colin has a big enough fanbase that someone must have got there#but i see a fave i make a post and with the tools at hand (bad screenshots from the copies on youtube)#I've been Going Through It recently and so revisiting public eye on and off as a source of comfort (it is one of my very favourite things)#but haven't had the energy for posts about it or anything so no episode posts this time round#this has always been one I'm strangely fond of. i think it's Peter Sallis' wonderful performance as the lead guest#he's [SPOILER] a serial bigamist and deceiver of women and yet he's somehow so very.. sympathetic isn't the word. but he has an almost#resigned reasonableness to his acknowledgement that yes‚ he's a dick‚ but he's just such a wife guy that he couldn’t stop getting married#it actually makes Frank's own actions (he covers for Sallis for the sake of the wife who hired him) feel somehow even grubbier and immoral#idk i haven't the brains to type it out#but i always appreciate this ep in a weird way
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#polls#song lyrics#i know some of you will probably take psychic damage halfway through this poll#unfortunately that's still one of the lines that makes me shiver with jealousy so cope#also shout out to manuel from zeal & ardor who has apparently already seen me talk about his lyrics on tumblr#and who will probably get a song lyric poll all to himself one of these days#i should do a dessa one too but the idea of making choices from all her songs like that is so overwhelming#i'm sure this'll be a playlist at the end and also you can ask if you're curious about a song and don't feel like googling#sorry all of these are english but that's the only language i know well enough to appreciate the poetry in#yet
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Hey I found ur art uncredited on tik Tok
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMreQSnaw/
They said they "found it on Reddit" so they just decided to steal it and post it ig?? Ugh!!
Wow, that's a whole other repost to the one I thought it was going to be, lol. It's been reposted to TikTok once before, and I'm also not surprised this person got it from Reddit, where I doubt I was credited either.
At the end of the day I appreciate the heads up but there's nothing I can really do about it. The most helpful thing anyone can do is to leave comments on the reposts to provide credit,* because if artists ever try and comment then we pretty invariably get attacked. Don't be mean or aggressive, that just builds their animosity towards the artists, but I do think people respond positively to outside pressure to do the right thing 🤷
*Remember to make sure there's enough context - eg. something like "art by @ landegart on Twitter" is more searchable/useful than "artist is Landeg" to someone on TikTok who has no idea who I am haha
#this comic has been reposted A Lot and I appreciate people keeping me in the loop but it's just wearing me down#I can't do much about it and I'd rather just ignore it rather than spend time thinking about it#especially when people get into arguments with them on my behalf and now suddenly I'M the one catching heat#like it's been reposted a couple of times to twitter too and when people tell them to credit me-#-the reposters call *me* a bitch like. I'm not even there any more you're arguing with the wall#anyway. it makes me happy to see people politely but firmly crediting artists in the comments section :) thank you!#also it's kind of interesting that the conversation has become entirely about credit. when I don't want it reposted WITH credit either#I just don't want my art reposted to sites like reddit or tiktok at all. if I wanted it there I'd share it there myself#and the fact that I don't says a lot about what kind of communities those places have fostered#there's a reason like zero artists use reddit to share their own work even though it's a pretty big platform#anyway that part isn't @ you at all anon thank you for your message & keeping me informed#it's more just how the conversation has gradually shifted from 'reposting is bad' to 'reposting without credit is bad'#i understand that it's because we can't stop people from reposting so it's basically the most we can ask for. but still#and make sure you guys aren't following reposters here on Tumblr. even a lot of the ones who say they get permission just lie lol
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I can't believe I have to spell it out but if you really really want to repost something you saw on tumblr to some other platform please credit the original creator??? And no, "credit to the owner" does NOT count 🙄🙃
#asking to not repost at all or even not miscaption things would be probably too much lol but at least credit people???#I thought it was obvious but apparently not???#I'm blocking everyone I saw doing it with my stuff but they still find a way somehow???#I know I should probably sign everything but I can't be bothered + have too many unsigned things to start doing it out of nowhere +#+ don't think most of them are That Good lol#but I still spend my own time on things even if they are silly and simple and unoriginal??? they don't materialise out of thin air???#like I don't want to sound like an arrogant bitch; fandom is just a hobby that distracts me from The Horrors -#- but stumbling upon something I made without a link to my tumblr or my username mentioned is upsetting#especially if it's done by a fandom old or whatever it's called🙄#sorry I don't want to be an anonymous content provider for your 1300 stupid twitter followers 🙃🙃🙃#I whine a lot lately don't I#but like why can't they even steal a gifset properly and have to make an ugly screenshot of it instead😭#oh and while I'm at it - attaching fics as files to download without a link to ao3 (or even the author's name) is not ok either imo ://#this most likely won't reach the intended audience BUT STILL#maybe I'm overreacting but it has been annoying me for a while now -#- and seeing A SCREENSHOT of my gifset in the wild without my name posted by someone who I was SURE I blocked was the last straw I guess 🙃
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i haven’t been here much recently, and i’m sorry i’ve only been negative on the off chance i’ve been online, but let me just say one last piece before the end of this month, so that maybe the next might be better….
#or maybe my time here ends w this month…i’m not sure i guess it all depends on how i feel but as of right now#everytime i think i'm fine i open tumblr and immediately am sad again the whole app has become my doomscroll at this point#i got a notification on a random talking post from a while ago and it felt like reading the words of a completely different person#lately i find it difficult to find any joy here at all when it always feels so lonely… a type of loneliness i’ve never experienced before#everyone always has ppl interacting w them who are interested in their stuff or are always sent things that are reminiscent of them....#i’m always praised for remembering stuff abt other ppl but i wonder if anyone remembers anything abt me#what is it about me that is so forgettable am i dull am i uninteresting did i not solidify myself enough do you guys just not like me lolz#but i don't want this to come across as guilt tripping or being ungrateful to what i do have because ik comparison is the death of joy but#it's still hard to watch when it's so in your face and it makes me think if ppl only talk to me because they feel obligated to#because anyone can say empty words.... i wish my perception of things didn't turn bitter i wish i hadn't become so jaded but#over and over i've felt irrelevant cast aside overshadowed and i cannot exist in a place where i feel like i'm a ghost in the corner#idk i've never felt like This before and i'm at least glad it's something i can walk away from by just....leaving...#sad that this used to be somewhere i can run away To but now it's become somewhere i want to run away From#i don't know...even if i get over whatever this is...things will never be the same for me... i just don't think i belong here#if only i had never made this blog then i would have saved myself a world of turmoil
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what if they were an ultimate frisbee team
#em draws stuff#em is posting about sharpe#sharpe#rifleman harris#daniel hagman#richard sharpe#patrick harper#francis cooper#ben perkins#south essex quirky#<- organizational tag for frisbee au things#see it is Funny because jason salkey was an ultimate frisbee player before he was an actor. also I just think the men should frisb.#<- not a real verb#'look if the terror fandom has terrebus fc then we can have this' says local man who knows very little at all about ultimate frisbee#but also I have noticed that Multiple acquaintances have acquired concussions playing this sport In The Last Week Alone#and thus I deem it Sharpe-Appropriate in its capacity for Causing Grievous Harm and Encouraging the Wearing of Cool Shades In October#so you see. this took me TEN DAYS and ouch ouch ow this is why I don't do group portraits that often#the height differences are Wrong here I am pretty sure but I have almost no conception of how tall any of them are. and I'm tired.#also the designing of their silly little outfits y'know#I do recommend opening up this image Large because tumblr crunches all my little details something awful#sailorpants saw this while I was still drawing it and said they looked like an 'assorted pack of lesbians' and really they're not wrong#other things to note about this au that we've decided: cooper still does crimes and harris has a podcast#stay tuned whilst I figure out how to make custom frisbees so that I can a) design them a cooler one and b) make them into real items#manufacturers I have looked at thus far have either been Suspicious or have required Large minimum orders#but hey if there are 47 people out there wanting a strange frisbee...
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I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been
#us elections#us politics#election 2024#i talked to an older friend today and he helped a lot#being with people helps#reminding myself that people care helps#47.5% of people in the usa care#which is a minority but at least it's close enough of a minority to a coin flip that i can always find good people#i am trying to be positive and not live out these last two months of peace in despair#being alone hurts more and i spent too much time today doomscrolling but i need some time to prepare for what i might see in the future#i do not want to make plans i do not want to make plans i should not NEED TO HAVE PLANS FOR A PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION#when i was 15 i had a whole plan for a novel i wanted to write. it was a whole carpe diem/memento mori about living life before it's over#it was going to be a good book. but now i'm not sure i believe in what i am saying enough to write it.#and i am not sure if it would be what the world needs.#but it would have been a good book. it would have been an amazing book and i didn't want to start because i didn't know how#and i wanted to wait until i had more writing and life experience to do it justice#and now i just don't have the OPTIMISM to do it justice and now it may never be written#moral of the story is write the thing NOW edit later make the thing now while you are still passionate about it existing#contrary to the contents of this post i am actually doing much better than i was this morning.#today an irl friend held my hand as i cried under a couch and an online friend reached out to make sure i am okay and i am not alone.#a lot of it is cold comfort. but at least i am regaining some faith in humanity. not all of it. i will never again have all of it.#but i will have enough.#i am a little more afraid of dying young than i was this morning and that is good. that is good.#i am not the only one who has lived through a historical event.#i will do a lot more tiredposting in the near future#especially as inauguration day comes up#but for now in the tags i feel at least a little better.#seraph rambles#seraph originals#side note: the content of the actual post is reminding me of otherkin back in like the 2010s lol remember when that was a thing on tumblr
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Hi I'm thinking about writing a h2g2 and gravity falls crossover fic. I saw your post awhile ago and I was wondering if you had any idea on how the two fords would interact.
Oooh this is a really good idea!
Hm, I haven't properly watched Gravity Falls in a while (I KNOW IM SORRY), but comparing their personalities from what i know they have a couple similarities and differences.
For first interactions I'm not entirely sure how or where, neither of them are naturally social but if someone were to start a conversation it would be Prefect, and once they realize they're both named Ford P. they'd hit off perfectly.
I think they'd love to go out for a small drink and talk about their outlooks on life, about space, their own traumas and relationships, about their research and studies with their respective books (Pines to the Journals, and Prefect to the Guide), and about their plans for future. This interaction could also be a lot funnier depending on the tone you wanted to take.
Ooooh they could also rant about their annoying family members (Zaphod and Stan)
They would also engage in an epic game of Dungeons & More Dungeons no doubt
#if you ever end up writing this fic please feel free to send me it when you're ready i would love to see it :)#okay okay im not sure if you were only planning for the fords to interact but a full crossover is immediately interesting me now#hmm maybe the HoG malfuctions with the improbability drive on and it crashes into the mystery shack immediately i think that would be silly#i'm really interested in bill and arthur interactions now as well. they barely have any similarities but it sounds really funny#oh wait they could relate to their world's being destroyed...even though bill's the one who destroyed his own world#i think the pines twins would immediately lose their marbles over ford and zaphod being *real life* aliens#ford prefect would give dipper his copy of the Guide that man would give a 6 year old a laser blaster this is tame for him lol#mabel would be super insane over the fact that zaphod has 2 heads and 3 arms and was also a president and zaphod would. not care#(i head canon he dislikes children)#i think a mabel and marvin interaction would be cool too#uber depressed and uber excited#i also need zaphod and stan relations yeahhhhh 2 greedy often self-absorbed criminals probably wanted across all 4 dimensions#i want to see trillian and arthur summon bill cipher by complete accident because they were bored and they are simply just Normal Guys#neither of them would be surprised to see a floating yellow triangle with a tophat. they've seen too much at this point this would be norma#someone needs to restrain me i've made too many tags#ANYWHO happy writing!! im sorry if i sound demanding you get to choose whatever you would like for your story i just got a little silly#i hope i answered your question enough#h2g2#the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy#ford prefect#gravity falls#ford pines#stanford pines#ask#tumblr asks#lucifers gluttony#lucifers inferno
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.
I feel like in the past the mix of this site being used for both activism and fandom helped contribute to a lot of unhinged politicized fandom discourse where yeah ofc there's a political tie to media but ppl used it as... a form of activism where it was given disproportionate importance compared to other activism discussions? Whereas now we're swinging to the opposite site of How Dare You Care About Meaningless TV Shows When Politics.
Like... we can have a mix of realizing there's more important stuff to focus on than shipping discourse in the world at large without also minimizing the insane doxxing and death threats behavior going on in fandom that people in fandom have to take into consideration to be able to do their hobby, esp given how those attitudes stem from irl political climates at times in ways that are telling to study. Hobbies are kinda how we prevent activism burnout also. Crazey how that works.
#Txt#I am also not immune to overly politicizing fandom#But also I use the site in the curated fashion one would use fandom dedicated forums in#So of course that's my focus here and ofc i process a lot here specifically thru a fandom lens#Ofc other people do too if you look at it in that way#So it's probably bizarre for ppl who do come here primarily for activism to see posts abt#fandom drama btwn posts abt the world being on fire#Ofc that contrast makes fandom stuff all look totally meaningless#when... every community has these discussions esp within curated spaces#It's not stupid to care about fandom bs that impacts me in fandom#And it is in fact weird to assume my posts here are a reflection of my understanding of the world and#a performance of everything I'm doing or not doing to help a cause#Just like someone who uses this site for activism probably has an irl club they're in#for a less stressful hobby. Or at least I hope they do#The difference is that's not under surveillance bc it's offline lol#And im sure clubs or whatever have their insane drama too that needs attention sometimes#Maybe I'm overly sensitive to these things as a person w health issues that make#my options for socializing fairly limited - so the specific brand of unhinged social shit#that happens in online fandoms does weigh more heavily for me and the tons of other ppl#like me who hang out here bc we don't have anywhere irl#But idk I don't think it needs to be an extreme case for there to be some basic understanding#of why fandom is like... important to people... and that other people on a site#where you can so easily curate ur experience are gonna be talking abt stuff#relevant to the way they've curated their experience#Barging into the crocheting subreddit like why aren't you talking about pothole maintenance in New Jersey#Ik tumblr is more mixed up but that's what this feels like sometimes#Specific spaces for specific things. What a concept.
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I realize I've been so flaky with responding to asks, finishing my drawings or fics I promised, etc. I've kind of been drifting in and out of tumblr without interacting much. Real life just finally started, and I need to build up a ton of motivation and find time before I can work on a fandom project. Just wanted to say that I'm still here and still working on stuff, just slowly.
#i'm speaking to a dead fandom but still lol. thought i'd disclose.#i've reached new levels of perfectionism with my art which prevents me from drawing or posting anything at all#and my writing has really changed in the last few years to the point where i don't feel a space for myself in fandom#not sure how to explain it i just don't feel like i really have a space on ao3 or tumblr or even discord. like i don't enjoy fandom -#- much anymore or any/all of the things that most people in the fandom enjoy.#not because of any drama or discourse that happened. i just genuinely feel like an outsider.#i'm still trying to get myself to write because i have so many unfinished projects i want to post#but at this point it's like. writing to a brick wall?#i don't want to be an author who stops posting because my works don't get enough interaction or whatever. the tog fandom -#- is in a quiet period. it's gonna happen. esp with the way fandom is nowadays.#so i don't want to do that to the people who actually read and love my work#i just want to express how hard it really is to keep writing when you 1) feel you don't belong in fandom / are an outsider#and 2) have next to no interaction on your works.#maybe it would be easier to write and post if my wips weren't all long. i think that's also part of it.#so to the people who actually reblog my art and take the time to comment on my fics: genuinely i appreciate you so so much.
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Mirror, mirror, on the wall...
Who's the fairest of them all?
#lowkey cringy caption but I thought it was fitting given the context#my art#artists on tumblr#the legend of korra#original character#who I still haven't figured out a tag system for lmao#Kat and Nia and their multiverse of madness#alternative title: what a difference half a lifetime can make#summiya at 18/19 vs summiya at 34/35 is like night and day. she barely even looks like herself anymore#or maybe.. she looks more like herself than she ever did? what came before wasn't her. it was an empty porcelain doll devoid of personality#hiding the rotten nature underneath that's been steadily seeping through#and now that she has been thoroughly destroyed her outward appearance finally reflects what she was like inside all along#but just as she manages to convince herself of it. she looks in the mirror and refuses to accept that this is who she really is#where did that gorgeous girl who was so excited for her wedding day go? or the one who lit up upon being showered with compliments?#what happened to them? to her? how did she sink so low?#she was supposed to be better than this... better than her siblings. she was always better than Zaheer and Aiza#but now she's easily the worst of the free. their betrayal doesn't even compare#she deserves death for what she did. she looks at the bruising on her throat and wonders why it wasn't enough#why he didn't press just a little harder. then at least she wouldn't have to live with the shame#how awful of her to wish for that. she is getting what was coming to her. she did all of that for the shame. it is her punishment#she doesn't get the mercy of dying and escaping the consequences of her actions#she is by no means innocent. what's happening now is simply justice being enacted. she's sure of it#she's alone and ruined and miserable. having driven away everyone who could have possibly cared for her. not that anyone did#perhaps it's better that way. maybe then no one else will look at her and realise just how different she looks from her younger self#she wasn't happy back then either but she was content. she was taking the first step towarcs the perfect life she was promised#now that very save perfect life is crashing and burning all around her. perhaps it was inevitable. it was always going to end this way#(sleepy tags so I apologise if they make no sense whatsoever or are just rehashes of stuff I've said before. I'm tired. gonna go to bed now)#oh. before I forget though:#injury tw#bruises tw
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thoughts on saavik?
I don't know anything about Saavik v_v I really love these two posts about her though! X and X I think about these posts often and whenever I do I feel like I want to draw!
#Q&A#I think this is the third time someone's asked me my thoughts on Saavik#which is interesting since I thought she was a fairly niche character - is there just something about her that makes people go#'Oh Bea would like this guy'#Or is it just that I'm on the more 'underrated yet prominent Vulcan' side of tumblr with my Tuvokposting??#anon#all I know about Saavik comes from other people who draw art about her I haven't seen any of the actual material#so I do like her but I don't have actual personal substance in my liking of her!#I think she's in one of the movies? I'd watch it but 'Watching ENT for T'Pol Knowledge' is kind of next on my 'Do It For Her' list#and has been for several months so you know - it's hard for me. When I could just be rewatching Voyager v_v#ENT really is so tough to watch. It's really hard going from VOY to '3 white guys and 1 sexy girl' and the whole series feels like army#propaganda somehow...like uh 'top gun' or something. Something about the distinctly American Machismo?#Like these three men are hardcore Patriots#I'd say 'these four men' but they don't let Travis speak bc he's not white or a hot lady so I don't know what his deal is#Idk it just doesn't feel like Star Trek to me it feels so cold and gray and hostile but I'll work my way through it I'm sure#got way of topic in these notes but that's alright v_v
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