#i'm not putting this in the tag for obvious reasons

[lovelyshu]

I ONLY TALK TO DOGS BECAUSE THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND ME — with Minho

001 DESCRIPTION — how minho deals with a crying teenager he cares about

002 TAGS — all platonic, gn reader, use of yn like once, very fluffy, a tiny bit of angst if you squint (reader doesn't trust parents with problems or anyone else tbh + like lots of crying), very self indulgent

003 COMMENTS — what does crying at least once a week in the middle of the night does to a person? It gives them ✨ideas✨. Also this was inspired by my brother even if I never told him much. He was the only person I allowed to see me cry.

004 TAGGING — @hannamoon143 @jisunggy

Minho doesn't remember exactly when did he got so close to you. And to be honest, neither did you.

But now you were someone very important to him, going as far as calling you his little sibling.

And that's also one of the reasons he accepted when you asked to sleep on his house that night.

The other reason being that he knew you weren't feeling so good these days. Even if you tried to hide it, your obvious reactions to which no one seemed to notice or care gave it away.

Well, that didn't mean he was expecting to her crying in the middle of the night.

It was 1:35 am. And Minho had no idea on to why were you still awake. He was still feeling sleepy and tired, but as soon as he heard the sob coming from the other room, his mind put to the side any sleepiness in his body.

Slowly, he walked to your room, standing right outside your door. Minho thought about knocking on it, but you would probably just ignore.

So that's why he just - slowly - opened it, to which made you freeze, trying to pretend to be asleep.

“yn? Are you alright?”

No response.

Sighing, he walked closer to you after closing the door, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Minho knew you had trouble with opening up to other people, even sympathizing with the feeling. Knowing that, he put a hand over your head, patting it softly.

“If there's anything bothering you, I'm more than happy to help you. You don't need to bottle up everything.”

As you stayed in silence, he continued.

“And I can also just listen, if you'd like. I won't tell anyone about this, unless you ask me to.”

The silence continued for a short moment, until he heard you speak, voice cracking slightly. A clear sign you were indeed crying.

“Not even my parents?”

“No. If you don't want them to know, I won't tell them.”

You slowly turned to face him, sitting up. Minho seeing this slowly puts your head on his shoulder, letting you take your time with talking.

“Minho... I'm sorry..”

“What are you sorry for?” - he spoke in such a soft and calm tone that made you get even more emotional than you were.

Trying to find the right words, more tears begun to found their way to your eyes as you tried your best to not let them fall.

“For everything. I'm a failure, I can't do anything right, my parents are alright but it seems like I can never make them proud. The only thing I give them is shame.”

Minho moved you a bit, enough so that you could hide your face on his shoulder as he wrapped an arm around you.

“Sometimes I just want to disappear.. I always ask myself if anyone would even care if I did...”

Hearing your words made Minho hug you tightly, mumbling in such a low voice that you might've missed if it wasn't for the silence.

“You're not a failure. If anything, you are the most talented and intelligent person I've ever met.”

Minho sighed as he noticed that you were crying even more, knowing those words might mean something way too big for your own heart to bear.

“And you don't even see it. If you ever disappeared, I'd go all around the world to find you.”

Slowly, he laid you down again, but now, laying down as well, still holding you.

After some long minutes, Minho noticed you were drifting off to sleep, which somehow, got him in peace enough to do the same.

Not until he whispered again.

“You're not alone. Don't forget that.”

Was the last thing you heard before closing your eyes, comfortably sleeping while cuddling no one other than Minho himself.

[eveningrainstorm]

cycle knots

[somewhatsentientspellbook]

"I'll see you soon"

"You will, that's a promise"

[ballad-of-the-lamb]

sorry i barked

suggestive.

[raayllum]

Change

+ Bonus

[jonathanbiers]

Argyle never gets frustrated with Steve when he doesn’t understand something. He doesn’t roll his eyes, or give That Sigh. He explains things patiently, if a bit abstractly, and when Steve is way off base Argyle runs with it. Is Vecna a vampire? Whoa that would be wild, man! Do you think he can’t have garlic? We could just take him out with a gnarly garlic pie, my dude!

the way you're seeing into my mind.... argyle being really soft with steve and taking the time to make sure he doesn't feel stupid when he's confused is something i've considered AT LENGTH (specifically in dms with @himbohohoharringtxn who has the unfortunate luck of being on the receiving end of Most of my argyle thoughts fdjghkdfj)

i would like to preface this by saying that i am firmly in "argyle and steve are both genuinely smart" territory. i think steve is very neurodivergent coded (i see the arguments for adhd/autism/dyslexia/ocd and as someone who might be autistic but is diagnosed with the other three....i see these arguments and i agree on all fronts) and there's also the head trauma of it all, though that's not what this is about. he's not fucking dumb, he just needs things broken down and explained to him in a very specific way. nothing wrong with that!

as far as argyle is concerned - we've literally seen him in action noticing small details no one else has(one of my fav parallels between them), which ends up being the reason the cali group finds nina and el. he's not fucking dumb either, just delivered to us as a comic relief stoner character with little dimension because the duffers need to be fucking stopped

BUT ANYWAY! you're so right! argyle would see the way steve sometimes gets brushed off and spoken over. the rest don't mean it to be hurtful and steve tries not to show that it does sometimes sting (because it's really not that big of a deal to him and it's not like they're being outright mean) but he would ABSOLUTELY "yes and-" whatever steve's off the wall question or idea was, if anything just to make him laugh, relieve some of the tension. AND IT WORKS is the thing.

it's not just, "duuuude, what if we just lure vecna into the sun? he'll be TOAST in five seconds flat, no fighting necessary. nancy, you can put the gun down, we're gonna hurl garlic cloves at him with a slingshot!" in one fell swoop, argyle is 1. making sure steve feels heard and not spoken over; 2. acknowledging steve's input and effort in a way that, let's be honest, the others don't do very often; 3. putting a smile on the group's faces for a while because fuck they're kids in a stressful situation and need a laugh; 4. putting himself in the line of fire so the others can rag on him instead.

argyle would do this when they aren't even dating yet and steve definitely would not be normal about it, he'd be smiling so big and soft and then argyle would catch his eye and smile back and they'd have this little quiet moment between them amidst all the chaos and dread.

after they're dating though? oh, they'd be INSUFFERABLE. they'd be such a pda couple, with the ridiculous pet names("what the fuck did you just call me?" "don't worry about it, my lil sweet potato pie."), and the open flirting until their friends are fake-retching, the whole nine yards. argyle is hanging off of steve's back with his arms around his waist and not even acknowledging it as he makes his argument to the rest of the group that, "no, no, listen. steve is onto something here, i just know. what if-"

and when they're alone, it'd be less of the theatrics and silliness and more of the gentle patience. they're both smart in really different ways and when argyle gets something steve doesn't and steve is getting a little frustrated about it, he'd take his hand or pull him close and just distract him with a little bit of affection to get him to cool down because he knows being frustrated isn't going to help steve figure out whatever it is. conversely, steve does the same when he's trying to explain something to argyle - though he's less likely to get as frustrated when confused, and more likely to pretend to take longer to get it than he actually does because listening to steve explain a subject he's knowledgeable about is fucking hot, can you blame him? they're just soft with each other, okay

[slumbergoblin]

Hello ma'am o7

[bobmckenzie]

sorry for thinking about which perfumes my f/o's would like best on me it will happen again

[seaweedstarshine]

Sources: Nightmare in Silver (+ TV Tropes haha •ᴗ•), Night Terrors, Flesh and Stone, The Day of the Doctor Novelization, The Day of the Doctor, Amy's Choice, The Crimson Horror Novelization, The Doctor's Wife

[kanonavi]

I am once again tagged by @radellama, thanks a bunch!

~

Last Song: Song of the Ancients / Fate, by Keiichi Okabe

Currently Watching: Still Trigun (1998), I am unfortunately too busy to watch much else (Though I do sometimes think about how much I want to rewatch TGCF season 2....)

Three Ships: Xiao/Venti, Feng Xin/Mu Qing, Minamoto Kou/Mitsuba Sousuke

Favorite Color: Still cobalt!

Currently Consuming: Nothing at the moment, last thing was some chai tea. Now I'm thinking about grilled cheese again tho...

First Ship: Leo/Takumi from Fire Emblem: Fates

Relationship Status: Unfortunately, no

Last Movie: I genuinely don't remember... It was either Spirited Away or a combined Megamind/How to Train Your Dragon movie night

Currently Working On: A lot of my current angst is actually over the fact that I'm too deep in the schoolwork trenches to actually work on any of my own personal creative projects. But, my other project besides the Genshin Poetry Gala fic that I've been working on for months now is a TGCF essay about how the main couple are representative of the story's main themes. They make my brain explode <3

~

Tagging: @hollyisanonymous, @rubberbandballqueen, @tempests-bards-and-birds, @sl33pyr3v3ri3, @stardustdiiving, @h4msanta

[meteorologears]

16 22 8 9 for the ask game

Oh my god okay okay. Thank you. I want to preface this by saying that none of this should be too offensive (or offensive at all really) but questions 8 and 16 are based on a quasi-fabricated world in which c-22 is more popular and has enough people for wrong fandom opinions to exist in perpetuity. preface over!

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about - this one i'd have to make something up because there's no 'common fandom opinions' at all here really; there's like 3 people posting and occasionally they agree. uhh okay the only thing i can think of is i think Yossarian would have a difficult time engaging in conventional romance with the chaplain due to the way he characterizes relationships throughout the book (in the Aristotelian sense, these would be relationships of pleasure rather than utility; he'd have a harder time building an Aristotelian "perfect relationship" with the chaplain beyond merely a relationship of pleasure. While he does attempt multiple times to create a relationship of utility x pleasure combination, it never really comes through until the end, at which point Yossarian is gone). i think he cares deeply for many people, but it's always bordering on 'fleeting' or more accurately, one of many. i think he is capable of doing it (carrying out conventional romance) with the chaplain, but it would likely take more effort on his part given his character than most people give him credit for. Truthfully, though, I always love seeing people's Yossarian-and-relationships takes because I think there are so many ways people can be right, or so many different ways to look at it.

9. worst part of canon - i'll give you my stupid answer (rather than one which engages thoughtfully with the text in a metaphysical sense) which is: doc daneeka. i remember rereading it this summer and getting so insanely angry every time he started speaking because--everyone's losing things by going to war! why are you complaining about it like it's your own personal issue! they're not taking from you specifically nor are they specifically out to get you, it's just their general actions that you're detrimenting from! (NOTE: i do understand the narrative point of him doing this. i just find it supremely annoying). Worse is i think he generally constitutes as a more major character, which also deeply annoys me. not even one of the better ones. we had better options. smh.

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc.) - orrssarians (as aud calls them), aka people who are huge on the orr/yossarian ship. i understand where they're getting the idea from but... guys, what's appealing about that? i would honestly love to read someone's orrssarian manifesto because i would love to get a sense (from one of these people who sees that as the best possible combination in the book) of... why exactly they think this.

22. your favorite part of canon everyone else ignores - honestly a hard call (and i'd likely change my answer depending on when you ask me), but the first thing that comes to mind is this. heller c'mon drop the discussion in which this happens. the people (me, alone) are begging.

[coquelicoq]

this epilogue better be damn good. i met my limit for escalations over a thousand pages ago and since then i've just been slogging through waiting for things to stop happening please dear god no more apocalypse battles i beg you. maybe i need to take a break and read a book that has no plot whatsoever as a palate cleanser...but i'm kind of afraid if i stop now i'll never finish. also if i stop now then apparently the world stops existing 🥺 if this story is supposed to make me feel weary and like reading is sort of a curse then it is working lol. but i feel like that is probably not exactly the effect it's going for??

[bilbos-stolen-untensils]

I'm not saying this to be mean, or to give people byler-doubt, I want Byler endgame just as much as the next person but.. I watched a deep dive video on Superwholock and let me tell you the Byler fans mirror the Johnlock shippers in many ways. I think I'm done getting my hopes up because Johnlock broke my heart and I wasn't even apart of the fandom until 10 years later!!!! Once again, I'n not trying to be mean! I'm just saying, and it makes me sad to think about history repeating itself like this.

I'm not getting queerbaited in 2024 or 2025, I'm just not. And hey, if I'm wrong, be prepared to say I told you so!!! Please do, I will be HAPPY if I'm wrong <33

(This is my last post about this, so don't worry to all my Byler shipper moots. I'm truly not trying to make anyone doubt it being endgame. Also please don't send me proof or reblog this with proof or how I'm wrong, I'm not into that kind of shit. I'm pointing something out, that is ALL)

[skatiet]

On Grief and Loneliness (Excerpts From My Journal Since My Dad Died)

content warning: grief, loneliness, family member death, family member illness, suicidal ideation, existential crisis, loss of childhood home, animal death (nothing particularly graphic; just being thorough)

December 26, 2022

One month later… I miss him. That’s all there is to it, really. The immediate trauma of it all–seeing his face every time I close my eyes, hearing myself call out to him–has passed for the most part. Now it just feels like there is this empty space in my life. I keep half expecting to see a text or missed call from him, keep wanting to check in, even though I know he’s not there. Going back home and having him not be there… I try not to think too long or hard about it. It’s been a lot of that lately, just choosing not to think too much about it.

Christmas was low-key. I didn’t feel much of the magic of the holidays. Part of that is just because of getting older, I think. Next year, I want to be more festive. I just want to live life to the fullest to the extent that I can. I know my dad would be proud of me no matter what, so now I just want to make a life that I can be proud of, too.

I’ve had a few moments (or days) of really bad anxiety/depression, feeling like nothing is going right and it’s not worth it to keep trying, but I keep going, still. I am trying to be present and feel things as deeply as I can, especially the good things, and hopefully, I can find a balance between burying my sadness and feeling it to the point where I feel hopeless.

January 14, 2023

Often, grief is found in the little things, just like joy or love. I drink his tea and remember making it for him when he couldn’t do it himself, when standing was too difficult, when I was desperate for him to have something in his stomach. A splash of milk and a spoonful of honey or sometimes sugar. How he said I made it extra sweet. How I was adding as much milk, honey, and sugar as I could get away with, trying to give him as much energy and strength as I could. How he would fall asleep waiting for it to cool. How I had to remind him to drink. Reheating it again and again. The desperation those mugs held. Now, it is warm and comforting.

March 17, 2023

My dad loved Ireland and Boston and the town we lived in (all the places he was from). He loved rock music. He loved hiking. He loved stamps and antiques and magic tricks. He loved pizza and sushi and steak, lobster rolls and burgers and desserts. (He really loved food. He even liked trying vegetarian options and eating them with me.) He loved cats and dogs and owls. He loved people; he saw the good in everyone. He loved my sister and me. And we love him.

March 24, 2023

The wind is loud, and everyone is safe inside their homes, and I am safe, too, but this doesn’t feel like home.

June 14, 2023

It hits me that I’ve lost so much all at once– a family member, a home, so many things that used to be mine. I’ve lived so many places that it feels impossible to settle in, to feel secure. So much of my life has been spent on the outside, always feeling like an afterthought, never a first choice, and I wonder if I’ve ever belonged anywhere.

June 15, 2023

I’m not a holiday person. At some point, I realized that assigning too much meaning to one particular day is a great way to end up disappointed. It doesn’t matter what I think, though. Every calendar will still tell me what I’m meant to be celebrating, or what someone is meant to be celebrating who believes in something I don’t. I don't believe in much, actually. That never felt more true than after my father died. I told my mom I don't believe anything happens to people when they die, that I think they are just gone, and she cried. I don't cry much, either, especially not when other people do. I cry because I’m frustrated, because I’m stressed, because I’m tired. I cried when my dad died, but not as often as I felt I should in the days that followed. I know grief is individual and no way of grieving is right or wrong or normal. That doesn’t make me feel any less alone when my grief isn’t crying, isn’t seeing signs of him or talking to him, because to me, he isn’t there. He is gone. My grief is anger. It’s frustration that I will never see him again. It’s missing him, and it’s aching, and it’s emptiness. It’s a hole in my life where he used to be. It's the time I spent on phone calls now allotted to something else. It’s one less text message to send, one less person to tell stories to. It's the unsettling feeling that my life has already been the best it will ever be, because he will never be in it again. It's listening to songs and looking at photos and feeling something that doesn’t feel like enough. It's wanting to comfort the other people who lost him because they are sadder than I am. It's having regrets about how it all happened and then realizing it’s pointless to feel that way because it’s over. There's no changing any of it, only learning from it. And feeling like nothing matters because everyone I know will die, and I will die, and what’s the point of anything anyway. I'm terrified to forget anything about him. I write down every memory that comes up so I won't lose it. I hold tightly to the things he gave me and the things I have of his. I am halfway waiting for it to hit me, to feel some overwhelming wave of sadness, too late for anyone to understand it, but I also think maybe it will never come.

July 13, 2023

Grief spirals outward. Hope spirals inward. But I don’t want the grief to lessen. It makes me feel real. It makes me feel human.

August 26, 2023

Buyer beware–I don’t believe in ghosts, but the last two owners died in this house, and I know a part of me will live here forever.

September 1, 2023

Four bedrooms. Four names in permanent marker on the workbench in the basement, four letters each. Four cats buried out back by the property line.

December 4, 2023

A year passes, and every change creates a new version of me that he’ll never know, and how different can I become before I’m no longer the person he knew at all?

May 15, 2024

I feel like I’m cursed to forever be running in this race where no matter how hard I try, how fast I move, I will always be in second place (if even that). Never the first choice, never the favorite. They think they know what loneliness is, but they are discussing it with each other while I watch from afar. I can grow and reach and try and try and try, but I will never be enough.

May 19, 2024

How am I supposed to be a grown adult but still have the same feelings as when I was a child? Is this just going to be my entire life, never feeling like anyone actually cares about me? I don’t want to give up on people, but I am so fucking tired of trying and never getting what I want in return.

July 2, 2024

I’ve tried to make it sound pretty, tried to make it sound wise, twisted and turned the words around in my head, but I can only come back to: the only person who ever made me their first choice is dead and gone forever. And I don’t know how to make that sound nice.

[pyrriax]

ANYWHO goodnight tumblr i'll be back on the art grind tomorrow i think 🙏

[quarks-pussy]

Also, I think this isn't strictly a spoiler (even tho it is) but I would fucking die for Quimp. Realest bro of ever