#i'm mostly done with my model now though so i can go back to being normal JHLSKHFKS

[miodiodavinci]

well. in any event, the utau guide is nearly done save for the oto section and the little bits at the end, so hopefully i can have that up soon sdjfkhgl

[occultbooks]

Please tell me all your trans Wilson headcanons OP

oh my goodness is this.... an excuse to talk about trans wilson...? oh my goodness ok let me get my affairs in order, no pun intended. I dont know what you want specifically, but a lot of these are just thoughts about how the idea of wilson being trans ties into canon

I think being trans is where a lot of wilson's comphet comes from. not only will being with a woman make him look "normal," but also like a man, and by extension, he will be viewed as a "normal man"

he absolutely would have done the legit porn part of feral pleasures if he had had the equipment at the time. in fact, there are a lot of things he would have done if he were a cis man. but, c'est la vie

he's stealth, but told cuddy because they're besties and wilson felt like he could actually trust her, despite having known house for longer. house found out accidentally, but doesn't tell anyone because (his words) "I'm not a monster, jimmy"

he went off T in his 30s because he thought it would dampen his sex drive and save his marriage (it only worked for a little while). he didn't get back on T until around 2005, which is why he looks so twinkish and young in the first season.

he was in girl scouts as a kid. yes, this is me projecting.

house did his phalloplasty and wilson still does not know how he let that happen. both of them, however, are happy with the result.

before top surgery, he used to fall asleep with his binder on all the time. its a miracle his ribs are intact.

he gets dysphoric about random shit. his paranoid ass looks in the mirror and goes "do you think my teeth are too feminine?" and it gives house a headache

the mcgill sweater was absolutely his chest dysphoria sweater

he used to go on trans internet forums and soak up all the insane information about "how to pass," like shaving peach fuzz, or not eating chocolate because there's too much estrogen in it, or standing in a superhero pose, and he did it, even though he knew it wasn't scientifically sound. again, I am projecting

taub is the only other person who knows because wilson approached him about facial masculinization surgery. he opted not to get it because the way taub said "no offense, but why do you need that?" made him feel like it probably wasn't necessary

he shaves his face for professionalism reasons, but he's actually a very hairy man. being hairy is important to him, mostly because its another arbitrary thing that makes him a "normal man," but also because he knows that people (women and house) find it attractive.

his family is not super duper understanding, but they try their best. his mom beats herself up because she thinks he didn't have a strong enough female role model in his life. they're trying.

that's all I can think of right now. I hope this is sufficient :3

[butchreg]

big bro vi with a trans male regressor headcanons !!

requested by @littlestsheriff !! i'm sorry this is so late i've been swamped with finals , i sigh. ( ps if you are into arcane and are a regressor check out his stuff !! ) i think i said this last time but i love writing cg vi bc he's one of my fictional cgs so this got me excited (>///<). you know the drill by now (i hope), vi will be referred to with he/him pronouns. if you disagree with this headcanon that's perfectly fine but any hate / transphobia will be blocked. arcane masterlist here , upcoming list here

vi is so supportive of you when you come out. he's always threatening to beat up anyone who would potentially unsupportive and if he had to he would no questions asked. he's not a trans man but he is transmasc so he knows all about trans stuff and is more than happy to help you out with your t shots and with getting trans tape or a binder !

vi teaching his little brother (you !) how to do t shots, doing his with you and giving you a big smile and a high five when you're done. he's impressed with how good you are with it, telling you how much he cried his first time (his one thing is needles... bleegh).

vi mostly calls you "little man" but of course being the silly guy he is he gets in a couple silly nicknames as well like "stinky" and "squirt". you mostly call him bubba. he doesn't really like parental titles cause he's your brother not your parent !

if you're both really small then caitlyn will take care of you guys but usually he's old enough to take you on adventures himself. even if he's feeling smaller than usual he's still really proud of being your big brother. he always wants to give you your bottle, or to give you his blankie to keep you nice and warm. he's really protective of you even when he's feeling younger. "mama, can i see bubby?" "not now, silly, you've just seen him 5 minutes ago, let him have his nap."

if you're feeling fussy, vi will slip you a sweet from his secret stash. he sometimes will try to bribe you with his candy which if you're being honest always works. he's never trying to get you to do anything really naughty but maybe bribing you to not tell caitlyn on the rare occasion he has an accident or so you'll keep quiet for a little while.

vi is always bragging to his friends about you, telling them how awesome you are. he's so so proud to have you as a brother, always trying to be a good role model for you. if someone even jokingly says something at your expense he'll give them a threatening look and make a fist at them.

playfighting !! oh you guys are always playfighting or rough housing. it stops immediately if someone is hurt though, if you ever cry out he jumps back immediately going from silly to serious in a second. "i'm really sorry, did i hurt you? should i get mama? please don't cry !"

gets you two matching stuffies as a surprise. his is named after you and yours is named after him.

vi trying to give you your first gender affirming haircut. he's so proud of himself, then caitlyn comes in to find you two and gasps. "d'y'like it mama?" he asks and she's all "vi, my love, what have you done to your brother?" she tries to sound angry, but a chuckle slips through. you actually kind of like it, at least it's better than your old long hair, but caitlyn insists you get to a real barber asap. poor vi is really bummed.

vi helping you dye your hair, proudly ruffling it when you're done. "oh yeaahhh, that's badass, little man !" he gives you a high five, going on and on about how cool it looks. you wanted to look just like him so it delights you that he approves.

[themeraldee]

The ask with homelander with an s/o that make things got me thinking, how about other types of art too?

Like homelander with an s/o that usually draw but it's mostly doodles and like have a very specific way of drawing a chibi version of him in the back corners on the notebooks? So it's usually silly but every now and then homelander get a full painted or rendered piece of him? (This got me thinking in the titanic scene like homelander in the couch like :paint me ***strike model pose*** and then getting impatient because a full piece takes more time than the usual 5-10 minutes of the lil doodles)

Or with an s/o that writes poetry so write letters and love poems for him?

I love your blog:3

Thank you 🥹🥹🩷 I'm so glad you like it here!!

I love this! Anything that involves Homelander getting handmade gifts is gold! With his entire world revolving around corporate merchandising and how much revenue he can bring, money loses its meaning very quickly. And while any gift you'd buy (with your money or his) would bring a smile to his face, loving that you saw it and thought of him; the notion that you spent time crafting this gift that noone else has would just rock his world!

I imagine that handmade gifts are in general very rare for him because I'm sure most of the fan mail gets dealt with by Vought and if his fans make something for him he either doesn't see it or it's generic enough for him not to care about it.

But I love the 'so obsessed with each other even though they're together' kinda theme where his SO still writes him sweet notes and letters that absolutely melt his heart. This goes back to sewing notes into his costume only for him to see I mentioned in a pervious ask.

He'd keep all the letters in a box, rereading them anytime his SO would be out of town, like that sap he is.

I love the idea of his SO having like a collection of Homelander doodles. That'd be super cute.

Also you know he's being such a whiny baby just constantly going.

"How much longer is this going to take?"

"You done yet? Can I see??"

just for his SO to go like.

"Be patient, I'm trying to get familiar with your anatomy, I want it to look right."

"Oh I know one way to get familiar with my anatomy alright." There he goes insufferably wiggling his eyebrows.

His SO just throws a piece of charcoal at him.

[alexanderwales]

I've started playing Persona 5 Royal, my first Persona game, because it was ridiculously cheap on Steam. Back when I had GamePass, I installed it but never played past the opening, which I think is a bit weak. I'm about 20 hours in, through the first two palaces, and I'm not sure that my opinion is going to change too much, but I'm registering it now just in case (with some spoilers for the first fourth of the game):

I think having a division between the physical world and the mental world, which is physically represented, is super cool. I used it in Dark Wizard of Donkerk, and am overdue for using it in something else. Psychonauts did it too. Inside Out as well. I will always love this concept.

I don't think I like the gameplay. The last major JRPG I played was Final Fantasy VII Remake, and I thought the same there, so ... I don't know, maybe just a whole genre that I don't have that much of a taste for. It's mostly the random inventory items and pointless mob fights that I'm frowning at.

Severe lack of harmony between the battle stuff and the story. The mob fights have fuck all to do with infiltrating someone's mind. There's stupid elemental shit. The mob designs are interesting but mostly disconnected from each other and any theme.

So far, the psyche stuff has been surprisingly shallow, given that it's the main focus of the game. First palace was a gym teacher (Kamoshida) who's abusing students (physically and sexually), and sees the high school as his castle, but ... I don't know. I wanted more. We're literally walking around inside a character's mind, why is the character study so shallow? He should have layers, like an onion, each more horrible than the last. Kawakami is the other teacher we know best at the start, and there's no sense of how he views her, whether she's a sex object to him, or a non-entity, or someone he's worried about, or what, and I kept expecting that narrative beat to happen. I don't know, I think my fanfic would just radically change the entire palace concept so we get ten times the interplay between real world and mental world, and so we can turn these characters inside out and see all their gross bits.

I wish that Joker spoke more often. He's not really a blank slate protagonist, but there's very little personality there, as much as I'm trying, and that means that other characters are driving the plot and scenes and in general being more interesting than him. This is just a matter of personal preference, and a place where I definitely depart from what the average JRPG enjoyer likes.

I generally enjoy the slice-of-life elements, and to a lesser extent, the time management, though there's a part of me that's just screaming that I should be looking at a guide to maximize values. And if I do that, I'll no longer be playing the game, I'll just be watching scenes and doing inputs. I am definitely not playing this game twice, so if there's a difference in endings, or a big chunk of content I might miss, so be it.

It's relatively low on the anime shit that I hate, though there's still plenty of time for me to be disappointed. The way they're handling Ann is ... kind of not great. She was sexually harassed and then immediately after they have this whole "nude modeling" plot that's played for laughs and titillation, and it's possibly just a me problem here (avoiding spoilers for now), but "girl who was leered at and sexually pressured by her gym teacher being then jokingly pressured by her friends to do sexual stuff she's uncomfortable with" is ... not how I would write it. (The answer to "how I would write Ann" would certainly be pretty long, and I haven't finished the game yet, so maybe it gets better, or gets given more meat in the hangouts or whatever.)

There's still time, but I sort of assume that we're just never going to go into the minds of the protagonists, which is a shame. Tons of possibilities there, and I think if they were going to explore any of them, they would have done it by now. I guess I feel the palaces are underdeveloped enough that I probably wouldn't be satisfied by how they treat the protagonists anyway, but it's what I would have done. Let me see a physical manifestation of how Ryugi feels about his alcoholic father. Let me see Joker's defiance. Let me see Ann's self-image. Show me links between these characters, the differences in how they see the social web.

The frame story for the game is an interrogation by the cops, and I am not a fan. Half the time they're just yanking me out of the story I was in the middle of to signpost "hey, this guy is important". Possibly this will all payoff later in some interesting way, like halfway through the game we reach the "present" and the frame breaks. I usually like that. I've had thoughts on the interesting ways the frame story could be used, and so far they haven't used it in those ways. (Also, there's a bit of weirdness where ... I am pretty sure that I was fighting shadows and using powers outside the Metaverse? Unless the interrogation is actually taking place within the Metaverse. Unsure whether I can register a prediction on this basis, or if there are just more mechanics/wrinkles later on. So far, the interrogation taking place within someone's Palace doesn't seem like it would comport with the rules/expectations that have been set up, but there's still time. I'd prefer not being spoiled if there is a clever payoff or twist.)

This game is apparently 100 hours long, which means it's going to take me forever to finish it. I am enjoying it in spite of any quibbles above, but I'm also feeling like it's only 80% of the game that I want it to be, partly down to execution and partly down to personal preference.

[bryce-bucher]

Midwest Lost Post #5

Stepfather:

For the past month I've been pretty busy, so I've mainly just been focusing on working on Midwest Lost whenever I have a chance. In this time I finally got the character model for the stepfather mostly complete and in the game. In this fight he is "unwinding" after work so he's ditched his pants and put on a bathrobe, but he was too dejected to change out of his work shirt. He's an abusive guy with a messy life, and he often takes his anger out on whoever he thinks he can have power over. Unlucky for the protagonist, this often means he's the target of his rage. Luckily for the protagonist, he has a big ass sword.

The Face:

For a while now I've been pretty concerned on how I am going to handle face textures in this game. I need the characters to be expressive for the various cinematics and for certain emotional beats to hit properly, but creating proper detailed faces is a bit of a wild west territory for me. Because of this, I decided to try an experiment. Recently I've been trying to learn how to paint properly using a VR painting tool called Vermillion, It's proven to be a really powerful and relaxing way to paint, so I was wondering if it would be feasible for me to paint character textures in it. At my current skill level I honestly thought it wouldn't work out at all, but surprisingly it did!

As you can see here, I spent a good 4-5 hours painting this face texture in VR. It looked pretty horrible until like the last 40 minutes of the process or so. I guess that's how its supposed to go, but it really surprised me that it came together at all.

After I got that base texture completed, I exported it and touched it up a bit to better fit the model. I then added a pair of eyes and eyebrows on top of the texture in Affinity Photo. They are a lot more cartoony / simplistic than the base texture so that I can change them out and create new expressions easily. I was honestly unsure if that would clash too hard with the painted face, but I think it looks pretty good. This was a really fun process, and It's got me excited for the amount of opportunities it has afforded me. Character creation is my favorite, but until now I really never thought I'd be able to paint the more detailed organic aspects of certain characters / animals. Oh yeah I also painted his knees in the same way lol, but I think going into detail about that would be redundant.

Heavy Attacks:

The last major thing I did recently was finally implement some heavy attacks. Rather than have separate inputs for light and heavy attacks, the attack button causes a light or heavy attack to occur based on whether or not you are currently holding the stance/strafe button. The heavy attacks I decided on are meant to be able to close in a considerable gap between you and the enemy, so that you can get in there more easily after slowly strafing around. Alternatively, you can just use heavy attacks whenever as long as you just press the strafe and attack buttons at the same time, so really they are for whenever you feel as though you can afford the wind up and cooldown of the animations. But yeah, as you can see in the gif above, the heavy attacks currently take the form of a two swing combo where you can lunge forward with the sword pointing outwards and then follow it up by swinging it back over your head and slamming it down. I think they are pretty satisfying to use as of now, but I might consider extending the combo in the future.

Conclusion:

That is all 4 today. I really want to get more work done on all of these games. I'm really tired of being stuck in the same debug scene in all of them. Hopefully this year I can dedicate more time to all this, and maybe I can make a second scene for one of them lol. Next time I post one of these it will probably be midwest lost again, but if not I'll be working on J(a)SON next. A big part of me being busy this month is that I'm actually attending GDC alongside Quinn K. If any of u mutuals out there want to meetup at GDC lmk.

[ask-your-fav-spiderling]

happy 20th birthday to ME. uhmmmm big news

I'M RETIRING!!!!! 🗣️🗣️

as spiderling. for the foreseeable future. potentially forever!!

i've just been thinking, i started being spiderling when i was 13 fresh off the death of harry. that wasn't my fault, i didn't do anything to cause that other than like exist. it took me a really long time to figure that out though. but after that i decided i had to fix what i thought i'd done, i had these abilities that meant i had to use them, right?

so i went out and i helped tons of people and i'll never regret that, but i got myself hurt. a lot.

and then i met the cluster. which is another thing i'll always be thankful for. i absolutely love y'all, don't doubt this because of what i'm about to say. a lot of you were not the best role models for a 13 year old. this is just like a fact i'm NOT upset about it, i can easily recognize that we were all in uniquely weird and/or bad places, but also gang the first time most of us met was ALSO the first time i saw a dead body. but we all met and now you're my family and i know now that if i quit spider stuff entirely you'll still stick by me.

then mysterio happened. and listen there are things that occurred that stay between me, him, gd, and my therapist, beyond what y'all already know. but it fucked me up GOOD, and i still have a lot of problems discerning what around me is real or not.

then a WHOLE lot of other stuff happened and i got angrier and just. bad mentally. i never wanted to fight when i was angry, i still don't, i hate the lack of control and i hate acting like my dad. but i was spiderling i couldn't just not go out. because then the almighty vague "something bad" would happen. and so i'd go out and be reckless and get hurt worse and worse and i'd feel awful about it so OBVIOUSLY to make up for it i had to go out more.

OCD is not a logical disorder.

and things would get better for a bit, then worse, and the "betters" got less great and the "worses" got more extreme and it just get going and going until eventually i hit a point where i realized if i didn't quit i would probably get killed. but by now, patrol was a compulsion. i'd have full anxiety attacks if i didn't have my suit on me at all times. so quitting was much much harder than i thought it'd be.

but i hatched a plan last year, you love me and my plans, and took down my rouges in a way that i believe ensures they can't come back. all of them are big long stories that i WILL be telling but ideally later. and uh yeah. did it!

so i think, it's still hard to retire entirely. because there are good, great things about being spiderling, mostly the community and getting to help people in a way that really matters. so essentially, i'm on call. if there's a situation where you need extra hands and i feel capable of helping, i'll be there. but in 22701? zip, zilch, nada, i am done. i did my time.

i want to be there for fun things too! conventions, events, competitions, all that jazz.

but yeah, that's the spiel. happy 20th to meeeee can't wait until next year to see if i can get drunk

[whumpcloud]

Hands

taglist: @suspicious-whumping-egg @gala1981 @whump-in-the-moonlight @ohwhumpydays @morning-star-whump

content: creepy/intimate whumper (REALLY creepy and intimate, please heed this), defiant whumpee, references to and threats of choking, discussion of workplace harassment, whumpee extremely briefly afraid of noncon but there's no real threat

Nicolas thumbs the collar of Derian's shirt. Rubs it between his fingers. Almost absent-mindedly. Is it second-nature to him, to constantly be touching something, someone?

The fingers flutter over Derian's collarbone. The indents are growing deeper. Though it isn't as though Derian pays attention to how much he's eating. He just eats whenever they - mostly Nicolas - remember they're supposed to feed him. They keep the kitchen locked, even if they let him wander the house, now.

Except when Nicolas wants to sit Derian on the counter or the floor as he cooks, and ruffle Derian's hair every so often just to prove what a condescending bastard he is, and no matter what he's doing keep a watchful eye so that Derian doesn't unexpectedly dive for the knives.

"Don't you ever get sick of touching me?" Derian snaps suddenly.

Nicolas chuckles. "Nope. I like the way you flinch."

"I'll get used to it one of these days."

"Eventually, and then maybe I'll get sick of you." Nicolas grips Derian's jaw, but most of his hand is on Derian's neck. Derian's breath stutters. "But I don't see that happening any time soon, do you?"

"I hate you," Derian hisses.

"You keep saying that over and over again." Nicolas presses his cheek to Derian's, in some mockery of intimacy. "It's losing its punch."

"Did you get hugged enough as a kid?" Derian asks. He can't push Ophelia, but he knows Nicolas, at least, will warn him. With a laugh, a smile, a split-second pause before that hand around his throat tightens again.

"No, did you?" Nicolas doesn't hesitate. "Because I think you like sitting in my lap, pretty boy."

Nicolas' other hand, once sitting loosely against Derian's stomach, now curls into his waist. Would it be worse, if Nicolas didn't touch him at all? That Derian even wonders it says more about him than he'd like.

What is Nicolas humming now? It's more recent than all the other shit he sings, a fifties swing to the rhythm. Doesn't matter. Nicolas sways back and forth. Tilts so that his lips just barely brush Derian's neck.

"You wanna kiss me that bad?" Derian asks, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

Nicolas laughs. "Not in the slightest."

"What do you get out of being such a creep, then?"

"It really should be obvious, pretty boy." Nicolas rests his head on Derian's shoulder. "I like the way it feels."

Derian squirms a little, and Nicolas only holds him tighter.

"You know, I work for a magazine," Nicolas mumbles. "Photography. All the models hate me too."

"I wonder why they haven't fired you," Derian spits.

"I haven't done anything wrong," Nicolas shrugs, and Derian feels his smile. "Never touched anyone in a way that was inappropriate."

"You're just being a dick and you know it." That was too far. Nicolas only applies a little pressure to his throat, but it's warning enough. "T-This isn't inappropriate to you?"

"Maybe a little too close and personal, but what could you really say I'm doing to you, pretty boy?" Nicolas is too close, far too fucking close, but Derian knows better than to move. "Violating your personal boundaries isn't a crime. Besides, I'm only like this with you, really."

"Because I can't go to HR?"

Nicolas pauses, then laughs. "You're funny, you know that?"

Derian can't help noticing Nicolas is avoiding the question. In some twisted way, he's… helped. Nicolas gets someone he can freely take it all out on, and everyone he works with breathes a sigh of relief that they won't feel Nicolas' hands on them again.

"All I'd do was pose them," Nicolas murmurs. "Shift an arm. Adjust the waist. Normal enough. Linger a little too long."

"You know exactly what you're doing," Derian says.

"Of course." Nicolas' fingers hover over the waistband of Derian's jeans. There's always a moment where Derian is sure he'll cross the line, but he never does. Only curls his fingers around a belt loop and tugs gently. "It's about power, pretty boy. As everything is. And I don't need to do anything more than hold you to feel that."

Derian's skin crawls under Nicolas' touch, and he's sure the man can feel it. It's exactly what he wants, after all. Derian would rather Nicolas beat him than hold him like this.

"Stop it," Derian mutters, when Nicolas' hands shift again.

"Or what?" Nicolas teases.

"Just hit me."

Nicolas laughs again. That fucking laugh. Derian wants to rip out Nicolas' vocal chords and clutch them in his bare fists.

"It's no fun if you're asking for it." Nicolas half-sings the words.

Derian slams his elbow into Nicolas' ribcage, but Nicolas only softly grunts in pain and fully wraps his arms around Derian.

"You can do better than that, I know you can," Nicolas whispers, and Derian feels the breath on his ear. "But how about you just sit nice?"

"Fuck you."

Nicolas taps his way up Derian's chest, and Derian hates that he flinches.

"Keep pushing those buttons, pretty boy," Nicolas grins. "I'm sure you'll make me mad someday."

[ag-minis]

Start of a Sylvaneth Warband

The Sylvaneth are so cool. They're like if Wood Elves took the whole "wood" thing literally and that's way better than being elves. In mid 2022 I started on a Warband for Warcry after convincing my friend to jump in and try out the hobby. I didn't make a ton of progress (I'm finishing these models as my next project) but I did paint most of a few trees that are worth seeing.

This one was my first time ever using contrast paints. It turned out alright. I didn't do my zenithal smoothly and, honestly, should've just done a pure white undercoat.

Even though I've only been in the hobby for a couple years, it's been interesting to see how people's opinions have changed on contrast/speed paints. When I first started, the prevailing narrative was that contrast paints were only for losers who couldn't paint well. Now everyone seems to have realized the purpose they serve.

Personally, I still don't like the look of a lot of them. I use a couple of them often (Black Templar, Hardened Leather, etc.) but I think the new slapchop method looks kinda off. They're a great tool that I find myself not using that often.

The other two that I got most of the way through were in a completely different scheme.

I had almost lost everything in a fire right before I painted these so fire/burning was really on the mind. That burnt Kurnoth Hunter on the left is mostly finished but probably the best time vs quality relationship for a painting recipe I've ever found.

Simple black prime, paint fire effects in the recesses, drybrush black on those areas to clean up any overspill, drybrush greys and whites to build up ash, then touch up the tips of things with fire and leaves.

Now that I've taken a lot of time away from these, I'm going to go back and finish them up entirely in the burnt style. Then I can justify painting another Warband since nobody I know has one ready to play.

[redolentgrove]

That Drifting Leaf

Loki and Bijoux had excused themselves to a quiet corner of Redolent Grove, settling together nearby the elder taur's plot full of Gracidea blooms. The spectacled Cinccino-taur gazed back at her mother with a concerned frown.

"Okay, Mom," she stated, "we're by ourselves now. So, you said there was more to you and Mum's separation when I was a baby, right? What actually happened?

Loki gave a sideways glance away from the younger taur, taking a deep breath and then glancing at her own forepaws.

"Bijoux, the reason we separated is… I cheated on your Mum."

Bijoux's eyes widened at this revelation. Her ears flattened somewhat, and she shook her head, shoulders slumping defeatedly. She didn't respond for a good few minutes, just casting a saddened, hurt stare back at her mother. When she did finally speak, her reply was simple, just one word.

"…why?"

Loki's ears wilted heavily. Of all the responses Bijoux could have given, this was the one that the hybrid dreaded would happen. The taur sat back on her hindquarters, letting out a long, heavy sigh. She pondered it briefly, looking at the Cinccino-taur with worried eyes.

"Bijoux, I loved your Mum. Part of me still does." Loki's arms crossed briefly over her chest, tail thumping angrily at the ground. "But… she and I grew apart. We fell head over heels early and became partners way too soon. Then we had you and grew even further apart. She was focused on modeling and barely had the time of day for me; I got lonely with just you in my life. So, when I met a beautiful Furret woman, I… began dating her behind your Mum's back."

"Did you ever tell Mum?

Loki nodded. "After about a year of seeing the Furret. I felt guilty knowing I was being dishonest, even though it hurt that your Mum and I never had any sort of romance in our lives anymore. I just couldn't take it; I gently let the Furret go and told your Mum what I had done. And of course, she dumped me. Deservedly, I'll admit. But I kept you in the separation, mostly because she wasn't about to give up a modeling career to take care of a cub."

Bijoux glanced sideways, then stepped closer to Loki, taking her left hand and gently patting the hybrid's side. "Mom, why didn't you just talk to Mum about that from the beginning? At least you could have parted peacefully. I mean, you've raised me alone for sixteen years; why keep this to yourself? Why stay alone?"

Loki's gaze turned to her daughter's, her muzzle forming an uneasy smile. "I was okay raising you alone, darling," she replied calmly, "because I knew I only had myself to blame for being alone. And I wasn't ready to start dating in case… well, I made the same mistake."

Bijoux blinked a bit. "You mean like with that Meowscarada you've got a crush on?"

Loki blushed hotly at this. Still, she nodded solemnly, her forepaws tippy-tapping the ground a bit. "Charade didn't seem disinterested, no, but... what if she isn't ready either?"

"Then you just start as friends and let it progress naturally?" Bijoux shrugged her shoulders. "Look, Fiamma and I stayed friends despite moving too fast because we were honest and respected each other. If you think you and miss Charade would make a good couple, just talk to her! The worst that happens is she says no. But be honest; that's all anyone wants, Mom."

Loki's tail swished at the thought. Still, she kept a quiet air about her, reaching out and hugging her daughter. "Thank you, Bijoux. For understanding, for being here... I guess an old mythical can still learn new tricks, heh."

Bijoux let out a squeak at the hug, her own tail wagging now as she patted her mom's back. "Even the legends aren't perfect," she mused aloud. "Warts and all, I'll always love you, Mom. You've done the same for me, after all. And besides..." Bijoux smiled slyly. "You're both the reason I'm alive, and the reason I can be my true self. That counts for a lot. Thank you."

The embrace held for a while, before the two separated. Loki finally let go of her daughter, tears glistening along her cheeks, then began walking to the gardening shed. Bijoux took her leave, left to wonder... just why had her mom waited until now to tell her? She'd ask later, but at the moment, she was happy just to know the truth...

[yooniesim]

I think one of the things that makes it so hard to find new creators (that are free) is how insular paywall/early access cc creators are. I literally can't remember the last time any of them used their massive platforms to support newer creators and they only seem to reblog content that features their own stuff or other creators they're close with. They are literally only concerned about their "brand" instead of actually participating in the community that provides them with their livelihoods. If you're looking for content, you're going directly to these creators first and maybe you'll look through finds blogs if you're more invested. To a point, I understand that's how popularity works, but they could be doing so much more.

Plus, since the early access model is so popular, I do think there's a push for new creators to switch to that. You get an initial burst of engagement when you first post and then another when your content is free, instead of just posting once and getting what you get. Also, I do think there's an unspoken rule that "early access creator" = "professional". So, if you want to be taken seriously, you'll imitate what the "professionals" are doing.

I'm sorry you're discouraged trying to find new creators. It's actually insane how much damage the popularity of paywalling has done to this community.

Hey nonny, thanks for sending this and also for your sympathy! I agree with everything you said, and I'm just gonna ramble a bit in a semi related way.

I think the point you made about professionalism is especially poignant. Creating cc is less a hobby now and more a setup for your own "business". But in this marketplace, there are no standards or regulation whatsoever- and many people here are just bad at what they do in various ways. It seems as if they either have the aesthetic & business model down, but are terrible to their customers and/or make terrible product, or they make a good product but can't quite grasp how to play the "game" to work the system to its full advantage. Sometimes you get people bad at all of it, yet they still charge. Because the only consistent thing about this community at the moment is that everything absolutely has to have a price, no matter how shitty it is. And there's absolutely zero consequence for being a gigantic douche nozzle.

This is a mostly disconnected side note, but when I think about these creators, it's just unbelievably depressing. I have thought about what it would be like to try early access a few times over the years, and honestly even the thought gave me such a burst of anxiety I immediately dismissed it. Just releasing cc for free is sometimes an anxious feeling for me, I just can't imagine having to base a business around it. The thought of possibly disappointing people and not consistently providing a quality product that is worth their money is a shameful thought for me. I have gotten a few $1 donations to my patreon over the years and even then i feel bad for not being able to create cc for a while because of my mental health, and not being better at cc making in general. And yet there's people that provide the most lazy, shit items I've ever seen without blinking. Stuff they never tested that doesn't work in game, two second conversions, no hat chops, no lods, gigantic poly, etc. They don't even know how to make cc and admit to that but still charge. I think I would die of shame. I'm sitting here thinking about, do they feel guilt over it, in the back of their mind? Does the stress and the anxiety gnaw at them like it does me? Even just uploading to curseforge for me, causes a bit of anxiety, even though no one pays for it directly. But CF is just another tool to be used to most- now people use patreon, but once its unlocked, the download link leads to CF so they can double dip. So it must not be bothersome to them at all. It's difficult for me to wrap my head around.

...I've gotten so far off track, again. Here's the part where I re-read your ask and try to get back on topic lol. Sorry, my mind runs a lot these days.

I'm glad you mentioned the part about how insular paywallers are. But I think there's even more to this than just popularity. They do not break from their circle, except in the very rare case someone new becomes very popular and they want to do a boring collab with them, and even then it seems limited. I'm pretty sure they have a server (or multiple) where they share people's urls for the purposes of chain blocking them. They also, without a doubt, share people's personal info to one another in order to ban their accounts from their patreons (at the very least). I have witnessed this multiple times. There are several doxxing rings besides the ones that were exposed, at least one exclusive to early access creators. They don't allow new people in/trust others easily because of this. This is why I don't trust paywallers as a rule; not because I think custom content should never be monetized under any circumstances, but because the lack of standardization and consequences for privacy violations makes it unsafe.

I've read through your ask again, and it made me think of something else, so bear with me haha. But the point about how you find newer creators, and how some will go to finds blogs. The fact of the matter is that popular finds blogs have the potential to be compromised as well. I have been blocked by mmccworld ever since EA temporarily banned paywalling and I reblogged a post that had a list of people intending to continue paywalling after that, and they happened to be on that list. They were one of the more popular finds blogs in the community, but I obviously won't be reblogged by them like I was in the past. Now, this isn't that relevant anymore since they're definitely not as highly regarded as they once were, but think about tumblr's lack of algorithm & what you said about how people find newer creators. If you aren't reblogged, you aren't found. And it makes me wonder how many other creators are blocked at a finds blog's discretion. I mean, this isn't necessarily a bad thing; you can filter people how you like, for example I don't reblog from paywallers on mine, or known bigots etc. But it's something to think about, and I think is a smaller example of how simblr works. If you don't play the game and fall in line, if you question the wrong person, you won't get exposure. And to most, in our current system, exposure equals money. Of course you're going to toe the line- no one wants to be publicly shamed, or worse, have a drop in potential income.

This has gone on far, far too long, so let me stop lol. But thanks again for sending this and allowing me to ramble in response, nonny... not that you had a choice 🤣

[epicrox]

Till The End Of The Moon Thoughts - Episode 2

WARNING: SPOILERS BELOW

PARTS: 1.1 | 1.2 | 2 |

This is mostly for me to look back on and see the moments that I caught my eye. Nothing analytical. I offer nothing to the table

I'm also a visual person so there's a lot of screenshots x

This is called my thoughts because I refuse to call what I'm writing down as a review. Reviews inform people and this post does nothing for people.

I’ve seen posts on Tumblr calling Tantai Jin a Disney princess cuz he’s being mistreated and talks to animals 🤨

The scenery is so pretty.

3. There seem to be Chinese subtitles on the right side of the screen indicating that background music is playing but I think they cut it out because I’m not hearing anything. Maybe it’s because I’m watching it on YouTube. I don’t know about other platforms.

4. Yeah, they cut the music now and it just sounds awkward and empty.

5. Omg she’s just leaving him there! Aren’t you supposed to keep him alive?

6. He legit looks like an old man because of the snow.

7. This man looks so delicate.

8. Even at the brink of getting hypothermia, he looks like he has a better chance of getting a modelling contract than me.

9. Disney Princess indeed.

10. Bingchang looks really sweet. I’m praying she doesn’t turn out evil or two-faced.

11. Wtf is this crow’s voice?!

12. It sounds like a demonic robot. This further proves my point about this show being sci-fi.

13. The crow’s basically a camera.

14. Then don’t let him die! That celestial being never told you to kill him and didn’t even mention the evil bone, your dad did. He literally told you that Tantai Jin’s torment and death triggered his demonic powers. All you need to do is prevent that! And what do you mean he deserves this?! He hasn’t done anything yet!

15. Her strategy is irritating me.

16. It looks like she’s cradling a head. Just the head.

17. I love that he just had to faint for her to understand the severity of the situation.

18. Wtf is that? His subconscious?

19. This demonic being reminds me of that demon that trains Luo Binghe after he gets pushed off the cliff.

20. He wants Tantai Jin to give him his soul to allow him eternal peace? Does he want to use Tantai Jin’s body as a vessel?

21. It’s the 2nd episode and we’ve got Xi Wu feeling him up.

22. Ma’am, how are you sleeping with that on your head?

23. She even got her dangly earrings on!

24. Get over what?

25. Ha! Xi Wu is having thoughts.

26. So am I.

27. She beats him?!

28. Why am I surprised?

29. OG!Xi Wu was an evil person.

30. The fact that she is hesitating about hitting him! Put the whip down! Even though he’ll see you’ve changed and would make him suspicious, at least he’ll be happy about not getting whipped.

31. She cares more about staying in character than changing the past.

32. At least take the gear off before you go to sleep.

33. After literally TORTURING HIM, you're worried for his health. It seems you’ve figured out actions have consequences.

34. AHHH!!!

35. Also as an otherworldly being, deity or whatever she is, Xi Wu can be really dense. I’d understand if she didn’t know how some things worked in the mortal world but for someone responsible for saving the world, your strategy is confusing.

36. I know she’s grieving for what had happened but she can prevent tragedies if she were a little smarter.

37. Is that even comfortable? I’ve always envied my parents for being able to sleep while sitting down because for some reason I can’t.

38. Awww. I love how confused he is.

39. He’s so delicate (This man is over 10 years older than me).

40. Yes, she’s possessed.

41. Just like villainess stories, is she hated by her family?

42. Oh no. She seems to be the favourite. Makes sense since the OG!Xi Wu was running around making trouble without much consequence. How can you be punished for your actions if you’re the Apple in your family’s eyes?

43. Also how many concubines does Xi Wu’s dad have? Does Bingchang and Xi Wu have different mothers?

44. It’s very clear from the beginning that the eldest brother is going to be useless.

45. Ze Yu just vanished. And make Xi Wu apologise to Bingchang. OG!Xi Wu must’ve thought she was entitled to everything. Bingchang must feel ostracised by her own family.

46. Wow, even the kitchen boys are bullying him. They’re probably gonna get beaten by Xi Wu and zapped when Tantai Jin gets into power.

47. This whole thing must be so humiliating as a prince.

48. How is he working in the kitchens and doing dishes while looking so pristine?

49. Is that ice?

50. Are they purposefully making him wash dishes in ice-cold water? Or is it something people did historically?

51. HE HASN'T DONE ANYTHING YET. But he’s going to.

52. I’m not sure you’re aware of this but you’re in the body of his abuser. Of course, he’s avoiding you. Like didn’t you whip him last night?

53. Also, you haven’t spent long enough in that body to make this statement.

54. Yep. I think they put the ice in to torment him.

55. This reminds me of a trope you mostly see in isekai mangas/manhwas where the ML is so rude and aloof towards the FL that all the servants start to think they can do it too.

56. One thing that irks me about these tropes (it irks a lot of other people too) is that when the FL begins to stand up for herself against the servants, she slaps them.

57. Ooh, the music changed.

58. Not only does he speak to robotic crows, but he’s also talking to flies. Or was that a wasp?

59. I was under the impression Tantai Jin would commit murder but he just made the head cook (I think) swallow a fly. His reaction after swallowing the fly would have made you think he was being poisoned or choked.

60. It’s funny that she’s lecturing the staff about how rude they are even though this whole time she kept on saying he deserved it. You left him in the cold and whipped him. You know he’s a captured prince.

61. She’s putting all the blame on the servants rather than saying that OG! Xi Wu and even herself were wrong.

62. Instead of Xi Wu slapping them, they’re slapping themselves.

63. “If I had dignity, I would’ve died years ago” He really is a Disney princess.

64. More specifically, Cinderella. I saw a video essay from a channel called The Take. They talk about how people victim blame Cinderella a lot for not fighting back her abusers. In one part of the video, they talked about how Cinderella allows the abuse to continue as it is very likely that her stepmother would kick her out if she acted out.

65. Tantai Jin doesn’t know that the Xi Wu in front of him is not the original. So if I were him, I’d be more cautious about what type of food Xi Wu feeds me than the servants. Although, OG!Xi Wu could’ve ordered the servants to poison Tantai Jin’s food.

66. This man gives me Jin Xixun vibes or Mo Xuanyu’s cousin who died in the first episode of MDZS/The Untamed.

67. Oh, this is hard to watch.

68. That guy threw the cake on the ground and then stepped on it. Even if I was hungry I could never take a bite of it. It took me a while to even eat/drink something that someone else touched with their hand or mouth.

69. Is she drugged or drunk?

70. omg

71. They kissed! And we’re on the 2nd episode. I know it isn’t the FL but still. I count it.

72. Ok, they’re drugged.

73. I remember the two actors were together in a previous drama and there was a make-out scene that everyone freaked out about. So I assume they know what they’re doing in this drama.

74. So someone tried to make Bingchang and Jin Xixun prince spend the night together by drugging them but instead, they both ate it. It was 100% OG! Xi Wu.

75. Oh wait, they actually did it? But they’re clothed.

76. He has every right to be suspicious of you and the food you’ve given him.

77. Gosh. That crow’s voice is terrifyingly comedic. I giggle every time it opens its beak.

78. Tantai Jin is definitely planning something.

79. At least he’s pretty while doing it. Look at this shot.

80. This king looks familiar. Wasn’t he the emperor from Ashes of Love?

81. Tantai Jin is definitely ripping his head off.

82. This whole political drama is going to push Tantai Jin to join the dark side.

[sylviegunpla]

Gunpla: Completed Collection of Minis Part 1: EFSF Alliance

Here's all the minis i've painted over the past few months!! They are as complete as they're gonna get and also top-coated and everything now. Let's run down the list under the cut! I've also rephotographed them on a matt that has scale, and using a ringlight. Each square on the matte is half-centimeter square, to appreciate the tiny scale of these guys. You'll notice that i have some duplicate figures above. Various people have gifted me some figs, so you can also see the evolution of my mini painting techniques in some of them. Because of tumblr post image limits, i'm splitting this up into multiple galleries. I will start with a gallery of minis associated with the "EFSF" (Earth Federation Space Force) group from the Gundam series.

PG Unleashed RX-78-2: Amuro Ray and Sayla Mass

I've already posted these guys but let's ass some scale, for fun.

I don't have much new to say about these guys, except that they were the first figures i painted in my "second run" of figure painting. I'll go into more detail about this later. I painted them and the others according to the color guide provided in the manual, as best i could. I think Sayla's collar badges could be done better and tbh, i can still fix that. I'll give an update if i do. Anyway, this kit came with TWO pilot figurines that sit inside the core fighter / cockpit. I present to you images of them in their homes:

This also serves as a preview for some parts of the PGU! I don't believe i made a post yet about the final build. I still need to do that, as well as edit the VODs of the build (the painting was also done on camera! ... mostly. I did some touchups off camera). This is the core fighter, and if you want you can put it inside the mobile suit, but there's no reason to. So i prefer to have it displayed outside, because there's a separate "core block" that you can also put inside the gundam, and it also has its own pilot!

Let's move on. I have many more Amuros for you. But first, a diversion! (EDIT: Turns out tumblr posts can only have 30 images at once. I was originally going to put Tobia Arronax here, but then i wouldn't be able to include the full set of EFSF characters here. So go check out the first entry of the part 2 post here: https://www.tumblr.com/sylviegunpla/753409506351939584/gunpla-completed-collection-of-minis-part-2 and then come back to this post)

MG 2.0 RX-78-2: Amuro Ray

This is the civilian outfit Amuro from the MG 2.0 kit. This was one of the "first runs" of minis i painted, i think in Fall 2023. I was convinced i could panel line it and make it look good. Honestly it looks fine at a distance but with the details blown up... well you can see it's a mess. Still, not bad for an early work. The rightmost image is when it was WIP, before being panel lined. TBH that might have looked better if i kept it that way, but you live and learn! This kit also had a pilot outfit figure:

This was also one of my early paints. Here you can see the panel line colors just running wild. I think the civilian outfit has less bleed at least. The helmet is also messy as hell. And as for the pilot that sits in the core fighter... well the actual model kit is currently disassembled for painting, but i can show you the pilot figurine.

Once i finish the MG 2.0 RX-78-2, i'll include an additional picture here. {NOTE TO SELF: INCLUDE PILOT IN COCKPIT PHOTO LATER}

I still have yet more Amuros though! At a local build jam, i've been gifted some minis that people don't want to paint. I got two extra figures of Amuro Ray, that match the sculpt above. I'm not sure if they're from the MG 2.0 or the MG 3.0 RX-78-2, but i referenced the color guide specifically from MG 3.0 for these. I also painted them this year, so you can begin to see the difference. Why not get the extra practice in, ya know? The biggest differences between my old minis and the more recently painted ones are two fold: 1) I started properly thinning my paints (which i did for the PGU figures, they were the first of the "new" line). 2) Eventually, i began using a pair of binocular magnifying goggles i could wear on my head, giving me a better ability to see mini details. I think the difference speaks for themselves:

For the one on top, i did a basic paint with flat coat, no panel lining or anything. Since i had two, why not experiment a bit. THe second one, i coated it in Mr Super Clear Gloss and then used some Citadel Paints Nuln Oil (gifted from a friend who's into warhammer) to achieve the "panel lining" / "shading". I think it turned out okay ultimately. I think the nuln oil works as a better panel liner over the super clear than some other pigments i've used, but it depends on the technique and precision involved. Oh yeah, and all these based were also custom made. Here's all 3 standing together!

Lookit those boys!!

MG Hi-ν (Hi-Nu) Ver. Ka: Amuro Ray

I think he's supposed to be older than in the previous kits here? You can see i opted NOT to panel line this boy... well except the line down his back which imo kinda turned out not that great looking. I probably could have used some nuln oil to highlight some of his facial details and give the impression of having eyes. ANd then here is the pilot figurine:

I'll get pictures of this kit entirely in a separate post, too. Right now the kit is disassembled and i need to re-assemble it. It's not a "WIP" kit, the kit itself is all done, got water slide decals, even has the "Heavy Weapons System" setup. Here, i DID use nuln oil, to try to highlight some of the suit details. I'm not sure if the lighting is blown out here, but it's also accurate to say that the suit details didn't come out as nicely highlighted as i'd wanted them to. Still, he's gonna live inside a clear green plastic sphere once he goes inside, so it won't be easy to see anyway.

BONUS: Watch this boy get Cask of Amontillado'd (and additional pics) I have to admit, sometimes when painting i'm having trouble finding the actual details through a layer of paint. I suspect the Mr. Hobby Aqueous Line may not be as useful for hand painting tiny boys like this, but it's also the set of paints i decided to slowly acquire over multiple years, so it's what i'm using. The Citadel acrylic paints seem to not glob up as much.

MG RB-79 "Ball" Ver. Ka: EFSF Workers

These boys were also among some of my earlier paints in 2023. You can see i globbed up some paint on one of the faces and kinda ruined it. I think the panel lining is mostly okay, but yeah. This kit also didn't have a color guide, so i basically eyeballed the colors. This kit is also one of the ones i have fully disassembled in the process of painting, so the whole build will eventually be its own post too. This thing also has a pilot figurine that lives inside the ball. I took some pictures highlighting the pilot, but i haven't applied decals to the inner ball yet.

However, i did get some duplicates of the standing workers from someone at one of the first build jams i went to! Which i used as an opportunity to just... get more practice, and try to paint these guys again.

Here, i used slightly different shades of yellow and orange. I think the details stand out a lot more. I also used nuln oil here for the shading. I think overall these look a lot better than my first attempt, and i'm rather proud of them. I'll have four workers able to hang out with the Ball once it's completed! This concludes Part 1 of my minis gallery. Continue to Part 2 by Clicking This Link!

[journey-to-the-attic]

Thoughts on the new game for Obey Me coming out and how it relates to IK?

(Sorry if I am super late to the party on this ask btw)

i played through a chunk of it today and it really exceeded my expectations in terms of story!! definitely has already outdone at least s3 + s4 in terms of character development. very curious in particular about barbatos' role in mc's time travel, and also his past self's beef with solomon

though i have two chief complaints - 1. the 3d models unnerve me (mostly in in the knockoff tiktok app and that one video call during the tutorial, where you see them and the really awkward expressions up close - it's not as bad from afar in the wanderer's whereabouts hangout things. speaking of the ww feature, i like the concept, but the harry potter reference does piss me off a little)

2. i HATE the remixes they use for the rhythm games. they sound so bad. please just use the original songs for the love of GOD

i'm also a little confused by solomon's role - i appreciate him being a lifeline, but he's weirdly blasé about the whole situation, and i can't tell if he's being written with his relationship with mc kind of out of focus, or if we're meant to be suspicious about it. also i would like to know more about what's going on in the present? wonder if there'll be any cutaways in hard mode that might tell us

ANYWAY all that aside, about ik!! i do confess i've already started thinking of how she'd cope in the same situation as mc, but there's a lot that we'd have to change about the situation - 1. ik can't do magic, so a lot of mc's feats are unaccomplishable for her, and 2. given the major size difference between demons and humans in jtta, it'd be very hard for anyone to mistake her for a demon

tbh one word for ik in this scenario: burnout. she's trying her best but the love of god can she not have a peaceful life

also (and this may be a little evil), honestly i don't think i'd give ik the present-solomon lifeline. i've got this sorta idea in my head of a different kind of lifeline, where ik's pact with the brothers and the sheer strength of their found family bond, plus the weird nature of time around her, means that every now and then, the present-brothers briefly snap into the minds of the past-brothers that ik's currently stuck with

the only thing i've done with this concept is the idea of present-lucifer briefly zapping into past-lucifer's consciousness, and comforting ik about how cold the past-brothers are with a hug - then midway through the hug, he gets booted out again and past-lucifer zaps back in. he just sort of finds himself holding that random human kid, and for some reason he just keeps hugging her. he's not sure why, he just feels like he has to...

idk what the exact set-up the devs were going for with the time jump, so i'll leave that to the theorists for now, but we could say that in the jtta version, ik needs to re-forge her pacts to be able to give out a strong enough magical signal across time for barbatos to get her back home

[revilleaj]

Art update & 3D Robodi model images

It has been quite a while since I've last really done anything online. I've been heavily burned out and tired constantly since at least December or so (I have done drawings in months prior, but I have never posted them publically). I still do not have a new computer, even though I have enough money (about £1k) to buy the parts or even an entire computer, but there are other factors in life that need more attention being put towards right now.

I'm still in the midst of trying to get a job (damn required experience and driving license listings!), and drawing right now is bottom priority. It feels like a chore and it's not fun when I have rusted from not drawing in so long (making so many mistakes really sets off my anger problems). I really do not like being pressured into trying to do things, and I have been experimenting with 3D, but only to an extent.

So, with that said, I am going to put making newer drawings on hold for an indefinite amount of time until I feel motivated enough to draw. I'm not done with art entirely and I never will be, but I think I really shouldn't pressure myself as if art is some kind of requirement in life. I've been also having drawing tablet issues, and I noticed there's a small crack in my Huion that I haven't been able to use almost ever since I had it (thankfully the thing still works, and the crack is near the top, only half getting on the drawing area).

I may also finally add some images to my empty DeviantArt account. As much as I do not like that website nor its community, I think it would work if I just put my favorite drawings I've worked on there, specifically ones up until the end of 2023. All of the really old and weaker art (mostly from 2018 and 2020, and anything from 2017) I won't be reposting, as they no longer reflect me, and have not done so for a very long time.

-----

Now, for the second topic of this post, and in a much better light; the 3D Robodi model. I'm sure I've talked about this years ago on Twitter. Back in 2020, when I was still in my first year of university, I worked on a 3D model of one of my characters named Robodi, using Cinema 4D. It was never finished, but I did learn quite a bit when working on it. Here's some newer screenshots of him, now that I've managed to pick back up an older version of C4D (I do not like the 2022 UI layout change):

This is the last version of the model to not be animated, from May 2020. The image is rendered using the Sketch & Toon shader with the Standard renderer. A few options were altered to remove unnecessary outlines.

The model in the renderer itself; right is the objects list, bottom are the materials (vertex colors and textures, some with C4D specific features).

The last ever version of this specific model from September 2021, with the FOV heavily reduced to improve the depth. A single black thin cube was added between the eyes to create a fake extra outline. A bit of a hacky effect; I did not know how to do inverted normals, in fact I don't think I knew that was how most computer games handled outlines.

The very first saved version of the model, in Cinema 4D's editor, made earlier in May 2020. The pieces have default names and are not parented, some materials are not added yet, and the shapes are noticeably bigger, especially the base of the head and the torso.

I once experimented with "realistic" materials and shading (including the dreadfully slow Global Illumination), which doesn't make the most sense for a cartoon character. Here you can see the unit plate on the back of his head, which I don't think I have ever shown before. The camera may look close here, but it's actually extremely far away with a very low FOV (dubbed Super-Telescope). Some textures are no longer in the project files, so this looks slightly off from how it did back in 2020.

In October 2021, I went back to the older May 2020 model and decided to try and remake it. I realized that using one mesh and extruding it works a lot better with the Sketch & Toon shader, as it does not create unnecessary outlines when the default shader options are left the way they are. The lines in the middle of the eyes and nose are from the shader, rather than a black material cube. Of course, it would be more wise to just duplicate each mesh, enlarge them and invert the normals while applying a pitch black texture to them. I abandoned the model shortly after the progress I made here, and I am not sure why. Maybe I was burned out and lost interest.

I should probably try to attempt making a 3D model of him again and some others, now that I know a lot more than I did nearly 4 years ago (yeah, can you believe it has also been nearly 6 years since my Reville character was created? Robodi was first created in mid-2019; almost 5 years ago! Good things take time and care). It will be a difficult task, but I'll make sure to export whatever I make to a .FBX model, so that it doesn't get lost to C4D licensing Hell. Hopefully, that would make the models work in Blender and such (the materials will have to be baked into textures however, instead of being separate C4D ones. At least .FBX doesn't use an external material file unlike .OBJ, which I and others have had issues with). Maybe I could use them for rotoscoping or somethin'.

Here's hoping to me eventually finding motivation, losing my tiredness, and getting a job with stable income alongside continuing to work on my passion projects, no matter how much time has past since the day I first thought of them. I want to keep doing things, not resting in bed most of my days. Too bad winter is freezing cold where I live, and I suffer from mild hypothermia...

[ofieugogyshz]

🌟 + the Johto Elite Four? /genuine, lighthearted

Send a 🌟 + name and I’ll talk about my self insert’s bond to that character!

oh man i had so much fun with brainstorming this stuff back when i made Our Love Is Here To Stay. will constantly be referring back to this fic as i talk about them

Will - I made him kinda showboaty and full of himself in my fic lol, but also i feel like that's kinda true about his character, from what i remember off the top of my head. Also weird vibes. Like, once, when I was a teen, I think I dreamt that he had a crush on me and wanted me to date him instead of Lance? So I kiiiiiindaaa very subtly snuck that into the background lore of the fic. I think Riya was the only one I've told that to so far, outside of whenever I probably posted that on my devart journal when it first happened lol?. Basically, he's just Lance's coworker to me.

Bruno - Love this guy, or well, the way he came out in the fic. Basically kinda borrowed a smidge from pokemas' direction with his character, but also the idea that he's also one of those cheerful loudboxes with how often he shouts HOO-HAH! or something :p Canonically, I don't think he'd be as big of a softie as I wound up writing him, but it was too funny not to think about him being like that. He's always very nice and sweet with me and greets everyone loudly. He was also the one who won all the betting pools on when Lance and I would date/propose/etc. Everyone overthought it, he just synthesized gossip info from the pokecen/league employees. He's kinda like that boisterous loud uncle who would also get very serious if someone tried to hurt you? But mostly we just enjoy having Pokemon battles together a lot and sometimes he shares his food with me if I'm waiting for Lance at the Pokemon League.

Karen - I love Karen!!!! I forget where the hell I got the idea that she was canonically a model/fashionista of some sort, but you can't tell me that's a wrong headcanon to have. She's that work bestie-in-law kinda thing except it's my husband's work but my bestie when i go there. She'll share devious little secrets about Lance with me, especially in the early/dating years, though by now there's less she could share that I wouldn't already know/believe. She still tells me when he's done something embarrassing (for him) and then I get to just later be like "So, honey... about <redacted event>?" "I really wish Karen didn't catch that =_="

When Lance and I were first dating/almost dating, she was very supportive and helpful for basic dating/beauty/appearance tips. c: She also sometimes envies us, because she hasn't had a lot of long-term relationships that worked out because of her position/goals/life ambitions and beliefs.

Koga - embarassing old man co-worker that you tease your husband about him becoming. Koga and I have battled enough, from when he was originally a Gym Leader and again after his promotion to the E4, that he respects me as a Pokemon Trainer. But it took awhile for him to start seeing me as a grown-up adult from when I most battled him as a kid and teen. We have a fairly amicable relationship overall, as far as the coworker vs coworker's wife dynamic goes. He's this cool but sometimes embarrassingly out of touch old guy I know and I'm some person who can help translate his teenage daughter's mysterious ways!

Thank you so much for asking about them! I absolutely love getting to talk about them whenever I can on a meta level bc of the fic I wrote, bc I went from being like "yeah sure they're characters may as well include them" to "this is my husband's squad of coworkers and everyone in this group is embarrassing to each other in some way shape or form."