#i'm hoping i'll be back to my normal update schedule but we'll see

[runawaycatwalker]

Part 20. Questioning Trustworthiness

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Description below the cut

Rena Furtive hesitatingly approaches a fragile-looking Ladybug from behind.  In the distance, Catwalker is leaping away across the rooftops.

Rena Furtive: Hey. I didn't hear all of that, but you look like you need to talk.  Your room?

Ladybug: Okay.

Marinette tiredly sits down in the chair by her desk as Alya looks on.

Marinette: I've always known that keeping identities intact would require some sacrifice.  But sometimes it's more important to be honest than keeping a secret at all costs.

Alya: Like how you told me you're Ladybug for your own sanity?

Marinette: Right.

Marinette leans her head downward, hands grasping her knees.  Alya squats in front of her and places her hand on Marinette’s.

Marinette: Catwalker though?  He doesn't understand that.

Alya: What did he do?

Marinette: Adrien found out Catwalker's identity.  But instead of telling me, Catwalker just manipulated Adrien into running away from home so he couldn't leak it to Shadowmoth.

Marinette swivels her chair so she can place her elbows on her desk as she puts her hands on her face. Alya rises behind her, holding up a hand.

Marinette: And now Adrien is fending for himself all alone and I'm never going to see him again and it's all Catwalker's fault!

Alya: Did Catwalker give any other reasons that Adrien needed to run away?

Marinette: Sort of? He said Adrien wouldn't talk about it.

Alya: Nino was the last person Adrien spoke to before he disappeared.  He didn't get details either, but it sounds like Adrien's father did something terrible to him.

Marinette raises her hands in front of her, her face full of despair.

Marinette: Then why couldn't Adrien have asked his friends to protect him?  We actually care about him!  Catwalker doesn't!  He just tossed Adrien away like he was garbage and then acted like nothing happened!

Alya raises a hand and cocks an eyebrow, trying to offer an alternative explanation without offending.

Alya: Catwalker doesn't strike me as someone who devalues others.  He was nothing but kind and empathetic when I talked to him—

Marinette: You talked to him?

Alya: I... thought he should know about Rena Furtive.  So I could alert him to an ambush if Mayura ended up targeting him too.

Marinette leans back in her chair and drags her hands down her face.  Alya turns away, conflicted.

Marinette: Nghhh... You should have told me you were going to do that...

Alya: I'm sorry. I knew I should have said something earlier, but...

As Alya wrings her hands, Marinette rises to put a consoling hand on Alya’s arm.

Alya: You've just been so overwhelmed after losing both Chat and Adrien... I didn't want to burden you with even more things to worry about.

Marinette: I get it. You were trying to be a good friend.

Alya and Marinette grab each other in a hug that they both need.

Alya: By keeping you in the dark?  I made Chat vulnerable by doing that!  I should have realized I was making the same mistake by not telling you.

Marinette: It wouldn't have made a difference.  You're right: We should have told Chat about Rena Furtive.  And if you'd asked me before tonight?  I would have given you permission to tell Catwalker what Chat should have known all along.  He seemed so perfect, I never thought that he could be so untrustworthy.

Alya gives a determined look.

Alya: I still think it's possible that Catwalker's actions are just a misunderstanding instead of being an issue of trustworthiness.  He questioned me about your identity rules.  I had assumed he was looking to find a way to bring Chat back, but in hindsight?  I bet he was secretly more interested in learning how your rules applied to his and Adrien's situation and what you'd think was crossing the line.

Marinette throws her hands in front of her petulantly.

Marinette: It should have been obvious that keeping everything he did a secret from me was crossing the line!

Alya raises an eyebrow and holds up a photo of Adrien on which “Call Marinette if you see Adrien +33 653257” has been written in red marker.

Alya: Are you sure you're not holding Catwalker to unreasonable standards because the line he did cross involved Adrien?  Messing with the boy you love doesn't automatically make someone evil, you know.

Marinette clenches her fists in front of her, looking haunted.

Marinette: It's not just about Adrien.  I didn't let myself think about the implications before, but...  When Nathalie was akumatized, Catwalker got teleported to his mom.  He claimed his identity was intact despite that, but...

Cut to a flashback of a miniature Multibug looking up at Catwalker as he clenches his fist.  A close up shot of his fist shows that there are only two pads remaining on his miraculous.

Marinette (voiceover): ...after I fixed everything, his ring's timer was counting down, even though I never saw him use his powers during the battle.  What if...  What if he Cataclysmed his own mother to protect his identity?

Cut back to Alya grabbing Marinette’s arms and looking directly into Marinette’s eyes.

Alya: You don't know that's what happened, Marinette. And even if he did do something like that, your Lucky Charm would have fixed it, same as it's always fixed whatever Chat destroyed.

Marinette: It doesn't matter that the physical damage got fixed, it's the fact that he did it at all!

The image of Chat Noir with a the biggest, friendliest, most genuine smile as he holds up a rose, his tail poking out behind him in the shape of a heart.

Marinette (voiceover): Chat has far too good a heart to ever purposefully hurt anyone, he'd sooner sacrifice himself than leave someone else in harm's way.

The image of Catwalker with a small, tempting, vaguely sinister smile as he holds a hushing finger to his lips, his ponytail poking out behind him in the shape of a snake.

Marinette (voiceover): But all the evidence I've seen shows that Catwalker would justify hurting the innocent—even his own family—to cover up his mistakes.

Alya looks away and rubs the back of her neck.

Alya: I guess Catwalker can be kinda shady when hiding things.  He did manage to steal my phone number without me noticing—

Marinette: He what??

Alya: He called me to help you guys detransform without Mayura seeing.  Yeah, it saved you, but it was still an invasion of privacy.

Marinette raises her hands and starts pacing away.

Marinette: And these are just the wrongdoings we've managed to find out!  Catwalker could be secretly working for Shadowmoth for all we know!  And I can't even do anything about it since Mayura is blackmailing me to keep Catwalker instead of tossing him in the trash like he deserves!

Alya looks at Marinette resolutely and points to herself.  Marinette sweeps her hands to each side of her in refusal.

Alya: We don't know what he 'deserves' since we still don't know the reasons behind his actions. Let me do some digging.  I'll find out what sort of person is really behind Catwalker's mask.

Marinette: No! You already know I'm Ladybug, you can't risk learning who Catwalker is too!  No one can know both identities!

Alya: I'll get a proxy I trust to investigate on our behalf.  The proxy won't try to find out his identity, but if they do, the risk will be minimized.  You and I won't be exposed to anything we can't know.  And if it turns out that Catwalker isn't worth the risk, then we'll replace him.

Alya places a hand on her chest pleadingly.

Alya: I know you don't trust Catwalker anymore, but can you still trust me to find out the truth for you?

Marinette softens.

Marinette: I do trust you, Alya.  You have my permission.

Cut to Alya in her bedroom as she places a call on her cellphone.

Alya: Hi, Nino. I've got a lead on Adrien, but it's something I can't get involved with directly.  Would you mind doing some secret detective work for me?

Below is the same image as above, only without text:

[beelearnsfinnish]

weekly recap: week 01 [30.12.24-05.01.25]

i decided to start doing weekly recaps as a way to keep myself accountable not only with language learning but with all my studying in general. So, peep my new rug and Pikku Myy cup, as well as the moomin calendar i got for christmas! let's see:

studying

Finnish

As I said in my last Finnish update, I hadn't been doing much this past weeks. I've restarted again, but I'm aware this two months are not gonna be the best, since I need to focus in all my tests happening in February. Still, I wanna try and find time for it everyday, even if its just couple minutes.

I'll add the tracker of what I did this week (only started counting the 1st tho) but yeah managed to get a session of active studying and one of writing besides my immersion. I'll continue my lessons next week so looking forward to that.

My degree

To be honest I don't normally have to spend much time with this. I only have three subjects this year, and since I'm studying online and have no classes I don't need to do much during the year. The only stressful times are when I have to turn in papers and exams. This being said, I do need to turn in papers next two weeks, and I have my midterms at the start of February, so I am indeed stressed :D

I started revising the content for one of the subject's paper, which is already something. I usually get decently good grades without much stress since its the second degree im doing in the topic and almost everything sounds familiar already, but last two papers with this teacher didn't go that well (imo bc of her way aka inexisting way of explaining the papers) so im kinda pissed off :D

I didn't need good grades in this degree since its kinda useless having already my previous one, but since there's the possibility of going in erasmus again i want good grades to hopefully get into the program again. Soo, this next weeks I gotta grind and start doing the papers as well as start working on the units.

Hygieniapassi test

New addition! Since my plan is to move to Finland hopefully this year (still don't know how or when but we're getting there) and getting a job of my area (media production) is impossible without experience anywhere, I'd need to get a regular no studies entry level job and I thought I could make things easier for myself and get it before the move. I'm going there late February, so thats my deadline!

Actually signed up today for the exam. I have been working on the material in the app for the past two weeks ish, I only have two courses left to copy into my notebook (I physically can't retain any info if I don't write it myself) so I'm hoping to finish them before my papers are due! I still have to work on a schedule so I have time for everything, but pretty happy so far.

life updates

work

Christmas rush is coming to an end, but we have an inventory coming soon, which means extra hours and extra stress. Not the most ideal thing with all the studying I have to do, but we'll survive i guess :'D

hobbies & social life

To be honest I don't have much time for hobbies these days, but that's something I wanna change. Went to see Nosferatu with a friend at the start of the week (loved it) and we have another 3 movies lined up for the next weeks (can you tell i love going to the cinema). Also planning couple meet ups with different friend groups, this doesn't happen often since couple of them we don't see eachother in months, but seems like everything's happening at the same time. Stressful, but happy to get to see them!! Also meeting with my bookclub, so gotta finish the book of the month at some point.

Also something I'm super excited about, booked my flights to Finland!! Already mentioned I was going in February but actually having the flights its a life changer when it comes to waiting. Can't wait to be back 😊

media update

📖: The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue - V. E. Schwab

🎬: Nosferatu - 4 ⭐️

🎧: Nonbeliever - Lucy Dacus

[lakemojave]

Hey everybody, no cyberpunk today, still resting after an injury at work and seeing some family this evening. We'll likely be back to our normal schedule on tuesday with a couple off schedule events later in the month.

I'd also like to take this moment to apologize for very little off-stream content this year, for the scant Falling Sun updates or the lack of Complete History videos this year. I've had a lot of projects in the air this year combined with trying to apply for a new job and get out of my already stressful work situation. This has all been weighing on me for a while and I think it's a fine time to address some things in writing:

My mental health is real bad lately y'all. I've talked about this on recent streams but I figure that y'all deserve to hear that I might be taking a break from the channel pretty soon. The best thing for me would be to step away from being on camera some upcoming month unless things improve for me soon. I'm gonna stick it out through Subtember and see about the next couple of big event streams I'm planning, maybe get that Elden Ring video out before I make a call on an extended hiatus.

That being said, I really appreciate everyone who tunes in every stream, who sticks it out with me as I try and get this channel to where it was this time last year, and who have remained invested in the new stories I've been telling in the RP series. It means everything that I have this community and that folks have stuck around with me this long. I hope someday soon I'll be able to keep doing what I do on this channel with more stability and health in the various aspects of my life. Until that point, thank you all for your continued support 💜

[ladykailitha]

Posting Schedule and Story Update

I know, I know I don't have a posting schedule, not really. At least in terms of what gets published when, only the days of the week stuff gets posted.

Well for the next four weeks there will be one:

Never Hold Back Your Step...- Sundays

Well Met By Moonlight- Tuesdays

Icarus- Thursdays

Special- Saturdays*

But I'm also getting worryingly low on my backlog (like I'm about dip into single digit range) and I hate having it that low.

So what I usually do is take a week or so off posting and build it back up. And I would normally take the week of my birthday off (Aug 14) to play catch up, but...

Yeah, I'm planning on posting the final chapter of Well Met By Moonlight (werewolf Steve) on the 13th. One year after it's release and since I'm releasing on that day, it doesn't make sense to only post that day and none of the rest of the week.

Also depending on what I am doing on the 14th (as whether or not my husband works) will decide whether or not I'm doing WIP Wednesday that day because if I'm not really doing anything, than I would prefer hanging out with you guys and writing. But I'll keep you posted the closer that gets.

But if he does have it off, I'll take it off and have two days the next week to make up for it. It would also be that week that I would take off posting and probably the next week as well. It depends on how much I get done.

But here's the exciting part, during this time between now and Aug 18th I will continue to work on the exotic club one and will have a ton of fun chapters to share when I get back from my break.

I will still be doing WIP Wednesdays and posting ideas and meta and headcanons and all that fun stuff. And maybe some fun polls too.

Also it is looking like "Never Hold Back Your Step..." (boy w/a bat) will be only 17 chapters long (maybe only 16 depending on how much of the Mind Flayer fight I put in it). I'm hoping it'll be only 16 really so that it can end the same week as Well Met.

I think a lot of people are hoping for their favorite parts of season 3, but this story was never meant to re-write canon. It was just meant to look into the idea that Eddie picked Steve up as a lost sheepie between season 2 and 3. Something that at the time there wasn't a lot of.

We'll see.

But expect to see me start posting again on Sept 1st for sure or on Aug 25th, if I have a really good week. And I'll be kicking it off the exotic dancer one, which I'm really excited for.

*Sir Steve, Knight Protectorate will be finished this Saturday. Leaving the Caged Bird Still Sings (sugar baby!Steve/sugar daddy!Eddie) to take its posting slot on Saturdays.

Tagging my permanent list to make sure everyone who needs to see this can.

1-@mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @zerokrox-blog

2- @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @cryptid-system

3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog

4- @justforthedead89 @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji

5- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon

6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman

7- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth

8- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss

[speakergame]

April Update - 4/25/23

hello and happy Tuesday!

sorry for my sudden radio silence this month! Things™ continued to happen for a while longer, and I just needed to focus on getting my real life back to a reasonable facsimile of normal.

however! One of the things I did while taking this unplanned break (well, partial break, because I never actually stopped working) was that I took some time to write! Since all my work on Speaker, as well as Partially Stars and Idle Hands when I find time/need something slightly different to stare at, is coding, coding, coding, it's been months since I've actually gotten to write anything.

So I wrote some fanfic, and I wrote some later Speaker scenes, and I wrote some brainstorming ideas for another project I might make in the far distant future. And it's amazing how much that's helped get me motivated again! I think all this coding has worn me down a bit, but actually getting to put some words on paper for a change has helped me find my inspiration again! 💙

I'm hopeful that this will be the push I need to finally finish this code and get back to the writing part of writing a novel. I hadn't realized how much I missed it.

In May we'll be returning to our regularly scheduled bi-weekly updates, and if I'm really lucky *knock on wood* we'll be returning to our normal game-update schedule soon too!

Also, in personal news, tomorrow's my birthday 💙 I will be celebrating it by getting a tattoo! I'm very excited about that 😁

I think that's all I've got for this month! Enjoy the spring (or fall, for my southern hemisphere friends) weather, and I'll see you in May! 💙💙💙

[tvccreator]

Life Update - Going Back to College, A New Tumblr Account for OCs (?), and More Stories to Come

Haven't done a post like this, so hopefully this gives some info on why I've mostly been reblogging stuff instead of posting my own content.

Firstly, there was my mental health crumbling a bit. My uncle passed away last Monday from cancer, so that was... fun. (That was sarcasm, just in case you can't tell.) I can't even go to his funeral because his side of the family lives in a different state, so I had to take a little time to acknowledge that he's now gone.

Secondly, there's the fact that college is starting back up. Yeah, I'm at college right now! :D I'm going for an English degree with a focus on writing with a minor in film studies.

I have a lot of work cut out for me. ^^'

Thirdly, I hit a bit of a writer's block on some of my stories, so I had to go back to older fics and work on those... then I got sidetracked by video games. (*cough cough* Billie Bust Up, Fate/Grand Order, etc. *cough*) However, I hope to get back to writing more of the stories and hopefully post some updates.

So, yeah, all this to say that updates on stories are gonna be slow, but thankfully my college classes are a mixture of online and in-person, which means my in-person classes get done before lunchtime for me. I should be able to update certain fics I've been working on. If you guys really want to, I might create a separate Tumblr to post OCs and possibly do a QnA with them. I know I've said this before, but I was very paranoid to even attempt it. Now that I have a story about Mirror up on AO3, though, I kinda want to build a Tumblr around Mirror's family and some of the demons I write for. It would probably feature a sort of bestiary for them, but even then, it all depends on what you guys want, too.

Reminder: these characters are part of my written universe, but some are based on actual theological entities (mostly Christian but there are Greco-Roman, Norse, and other religions in there, too). Mirror's family is a very complex bouquet of weird, but they're almost all my own creations.

Upcoming stories I plan on writing (hopefully - we'll see how my schedule ends up):

Fandom-based:

More chapters for "The Secrets of Marx Soul," including how he originally met (and began dating) Drawcia

More of that Rainbow Friends story that @thereaderinsertlady, @cottoncanderino, and I have been working on

Some more short stories on Fate characters, primarily Vlad III

I might consider posting a self-insert fic called "Legend of Dracula" on AO3, too - it's basically a Vlad III x OC/Self-Insert Character fic that I've been working on. That'll be up to how I feel about it, though.

My Own Personal OC Stories:

A short fic about Yyltemanes, Mirror's younger sister, and how she discovered her identity

A short fic about Taramuta, Mirror's younger sibling and their discovery of one of their closest friends

A short fic about Asmodeus, the demon king of lust, and his relationship with his children

A short fic on Lucifer Morningstar, also known as the Devil, and a casual interaction he has with a normal human being.

A multi-chapter fic on the Eldritch War, the battle that ultimately caused Mirror to become the heartless monster of his entire family and the reason Chaos Incarnate, the eldritches' parent, backed out of their lives.

Hope you guys have a great fall semester, everyone! I'll try to post decently often if I can!

[crossroadsdimension]

Fanfic Writing Update

Just casually posting this while I'm still thinking about it.

Arise Again -- still sitting as complete, still in the progress of being posted. My readers are getting three chapters next week because 1) Labor Day; 2) normal posting, and 3) 2-year anniversary of Tales of Arise being released. Still going to end up posting the final chapter the first week of January next year.

New Hunters on the Block (Arise/DMC crossover) -- I have 2 planned chapters left to post, and they'll both be going up in September.

Distant Cousins (FFVII/Trigun crossover) -- Chapter 11 is going up on Thursday, and I'm currently halfway through chapter 25, give or take. Writing is slow going, and while I currently hope to have this one take over the Friday slot, it might be stuck at every-other-week for a while even after that switch. We'll see when I get back into the writing spree of a proper rhythm with this.

The Chronicles of a Young Adventurer (FFXIV, ARR) -- Posted the first chapter this morning! Meant to be small scenes in chronological order, these are more explorations than anything as to how my Warrior of Light character, Cross Sylvan, confronts and handles the events of the story in her own way. I've got some ideas written down on this blog as to how she reacts to certain things, but I wanted to compile them into a combination of fully-written scenes, and letters and journal entries she has written and received over the years. I'm currently up to the remembrance ceremonies in terms of writing, which puts me a fair pace ahead. Granted, I don't plan on posting more until New Hunters on the Block is done, so readers will have to wait for more FFXIV goodies until October.

And then I've got another FFXIV story that's going up after we catch up with where Chronicles currently is. And that will carry me all the way to August of next year! For now, at least. I'd like to get back to writing more, but real life and general inspiration to write is making things...difficult.

I'll get there. As much as I don't want to have my regular schedule be sacrificed for the sake of something else, there's a chance I might have to.

[pumpkin-spike18]

✨WEEKLY PROGRESS 2023 #5 & #6✨

I swear biweekly updates won't become a trend. 😥

Weekly Progress 2023 #5

Finished programing SYVNH Demo 2.0!

Finished first draft of EKL script

Updated CG Gallery

Went through lint failures and fixed those

Sent to playtesters, did some fixes

Drafted announcements and tweets

Weekly Progress 2023 #6

Updated screenshots

Released Demo 2.0

Scheduled a month of tweets

Advertised on discord/reddit

Added release to Yan Jam 2023

Answered a few comments

Whee~ I reached the lighted station in the middle of the tunnel 😌 I'll be taking a break here before moving on.

So what's next?

For Stuck in a Yandere Visual Novel... HELP!!:

First things first, I think there are a few things in Demo 2.0 that I want to update as soon as I can (which may be mid to late March, earliest). Things currently on my list is:

Updating the smaller sprites by the textbox to be on the right layer 😅 Have any of you tried to save when one of those were on screen? Don't, please lol The issue with fixing that is that I hardcoded that in and it's spread throughout the script so I'll have to manually go in and fix that.

Updating a new voice channel to separate the SFX and the Voice sounds. This one was a result of myself having a brainfart as I started coding and mixed up the channels. I also misunderstood how the built in voice channel is normally used so I'll have to do a bit more research/testing to make sure everything works right.

Adding in a quick way for the player to delete certain persistents.

Finishing that last BG that you didn't see updated compared to Demo 1.0. No not the one on the date.

Maybe a few art updates

And then after that, I'll make a plan for the release of the final part of the game. Or I might do that first next week since I like making guides. The general ending(s) for the full story had long been decided since I first came up with the idea for the game. However, the details and path to that has changed slightly. I did not think certain things through until I started writing the script in Demo 1.0 and Demo 2.0 so some details need to be ironed out.

I also might need to find an editor for the full story. I'm not sure yet. I'm actually not very confident in my ideas and Smoke really helped me out during the release of Demo 1.0. During Demo 2.0, Mamep was gracious enough to take time out to do proofreading, but no in depth editing was performed. So I don't know yet how that'll proceed for the full game.

For everything else:

It's still early in 2023, but I'm told myself NO GAME JAMS. Yeah, guess who was prepared to break that back in mid-January and finished writing a whole new script for a game? EKL (Exorcist Killing Lie) mentioned above in Weekly Progress #5 might be a project submitted for Battle Action Fantasy VN Jam, which I am also helping hosting! Let's get lots more shounen-esque battle VNs out there!

I also have a pre-existing project which I will be doing the programming for. We're hoping to work on that once again for Otome Jam. That will likely take precedence over any other VN jams I participate in.

Of course, alongside that are some paused projects I had on-going prior to working on SYVNH: Pre-Make and There's a Clown in my Attic!! All the sprite art for these two projects are already finished so I do hope to finish both games this year.

And like every good indie vndev out there, I have a 20 page list of games I want to make. Of those, I've two where writing has started. I don't plan on announcing anything for that until the scripts have finished. (One of them are already at 9k words... 😥)

...And for the far, far off future. I have two more ideas that would be the same genre as SYVNH (BL + transmigration/isekai). Though I haven't a clue yet if they'd be better as VNs, KNs, or even as a light novel. 2023 is still a long time. We'll see soon~

[nimthirielrinon]

Dania's Tale: Author Update

I've finally started copying this fic into Scrivener, because as I mentioned earlier, I absolutely need to be able to keep track of enough things now that a normal word processor isn't enough.

Chapter 17 has been written, I've gone over it and tidied it up a bit, and I should be able to post it this coming weekend. I'll most likely have a fortnightly updating schedule for the next couple of months while I organise the Scrivener project (amazing bit of software, look into it if you're doing writing of any considerable size). I do also need to catch up a bit on my fic research (ie human playthrough) so that I have an order of events good to go. I haven't decided exactly where they'll go first after they've finished with Aemon and Redcliffe, but fortunately for me that's a few chapters away yet. Once I have an outline and maybe even some planned chapter titles in Scrivener, that should go a fair bit more smoothly.

Once the December holidays are done, I'm hoping to also have a bit more time and leisure to make chapter art. I'd like to have one for every chapter by the time it's finished, but we'll see how that goes.

So! Check back on the weekend for chapter 17! Sorry to keep you waiting, if you've been reading.

[youknowzach]

11/6/22 rants and musings of a singer in los angeles

i promise i'm not just going to complain on here, it's just been a rough few months full of high highs and low lows and i want to share where i'm at. we'll start with the lows so i can finish on high notes. the ups the downs... cest la vie etc

i've been in LA for three months now, still working my remote jobs in nashville and it's been stressful. the music is going well i think, i've been writing and exploring my creativity a lot these days but it's been hard because i feel like i'm completely alone. as soon as i got here, all of my relationships fizzled into dust. of course, i still love everyone that i was friends or more than friends with but it feels as if they look at me and think "he's fine, he's busy, he's gonna be alright." i've made a few good friends here which is nice. but i hate that feeling of "starting over." it's been really hard to deal with on top of trying to continue growing in my music career.

despite feeling like that, i've been escaping more and more into production and songwriting and meditating. i am constantly doubting my skills and my abilities which seems normal but at the same time, when i'm working in logic and being creative and doing whatever i want to do with the music and the tunes, it is a distraction from my loneliness and my heartbreak and my boredom.

i want to reiterate that i'm grateful and diving more into meditation and praying and seeking peace. i'm not sure if i'll ever know peace but just being on the search for it and trying to ground myself has helped some. i'm so scared you guys... (tyra banks gif) but no seriously. i fear for my future. i get so scared about "what if it doesn't work out." what if i don't make any money from music and have to live in my mom's spare bedroom, what if success never happens for me in the music industry and i'll have to work in the library again or at starbucks again. not that there is anything wrong with that but those aren't my career goals... when you're going for your goals in your career you want to achieve those. for me those goals are making money and being successful in the music industry. being able to fully dive into production and writing without having to work 2 jobs that have nothing to do with music like i'm doing right now. i don't want to just complain about "how hard my life is" on here but like i said, i'm lonely and no one hears me. so i'm turning to meditation and prayer in hopes that someone out there can hear me. i miss my friends, my lover, my optimism, and my hope.

i went to ethel cain's concert this week. it was so good :) i loved it. good thing.

i've been connecting with really exciting individuals that look promising for my music. some co writes that could be really lucrative, some opportunities that could really move the needle. good thing.

my single got played on the radio this week which was cool. i'm trying to figure out more creative ways to make content for social media, so filming my reaction was one of those ideas. good thing.

i have three co writes i set up this week, i have two photoshoots scheduled, i have a gig next week at hotel cafe. i'm blessed. good things.

i got back in the gym this week and felt amazing afterwards. if you know me, you know i ran my first half marathon right before i came to LA. but since moving here i've been slacking since i've been so busy with everything. getting back in the gym this week was a win. good thing.

i made a great pot of coffee this morning. good thing.

i'll post some pics as well.

i'd love to update this regularly and keep everyone posted (everyone being whoever reads this)

i do journal privately but i think a little update for anyone who wants to keep tabs on me is nice. i'm screaming into the void but someone may see this that needs to. i feel alone but i know i'm not alone. i have people who care about me. i have a lot of love in my life if i sit down and think about it.

[echo-three-one]

Whatever It Takes

Sequel to A Forgotten Memory

Roach's stealth skills are put to the test as he sneaks past an alleged Augustus base to capture him and gather intel about the recent EMP based attacks. Will Roach be able to impress Captain Price?

Previous Chapter : Soap - Experiment 001

Chapter 9 to another story made by Ray (echo-three-one) Comments and Reviews appreciated! I hope you enjoy! Love you all ❤️

"A SurPRICE Visit"

Gary 'Roach' Sanderson

Task Force 141

400 meters outside Augustus' Mountain Base

Germany

The winds were picking up when they landed and Roach flew about a few more meters away from Price.

"This EMP blast is messing with my signals. Captain, can you find Roach?" Ghost spoke over comms, his voice crumbled over the static.

"He landed not too far from me. Come on boy, let's get a head on." Price replied to Ghost as he helped Gary get up and untangle himself from his mess. Gary nodded and followed his Captain into the edge of the mountain.

"There it is. Augustus' base." he mused as Gary scoped through his supressed silencer. Trucks were leaving the area filled with armed hostiles.

"Ghost, you see this? They're leaving the hive." Price informed the recon man.

"Aye, sir. Looks like they're headed to Alex's direction. If we time this right you'll have less people inside there." he replied. Gary wondered why they were leaving. It didn't make sense to back-up an already reclaimed base back at Alex's.

"Let's go Roach. I'll take the one on the left tower, you take the one on the right. I'm currently spotting four Tangos by the gate. Fire when ready." Price instructed. Roach took a deep breath to steady his sights, quickly pulling the trigger once the crosshairs aligned with their heads.

"Good kill. Your sniper skills are improving, Sargeant." Price mused as he signaled them to move forward. For a Captain who's left him a solid first impression as a strict angryman, Roach didn't expect the kind words from him. It almost felt overwhelming.

"You go ahead and take what's important inside that guardhouse. I'll cover you from this position." he commanded and Gary sprung safely into action, switching to his suppressed pistol and into the guardhouse.

It was simple, a few cameras, some photos of people who they let in and a few map layouts. Gary quickly snapped all of them for Ghost to see. Roach also grabbed the radio and placed it near his ear. Gary set his sights on an AK-47 lying on the ground.

"Roach, be careful when using unsuppressed weapons. It might reveal our existence." Price muttered to which he nodded. It just made sense.

"Jäeger, kopierst du?" the radio muttered. Roach's German wasn't on point and any non-reply from the other end would result in an investigation.

"Ja, alles klar." he replied, trying to replicate the accent. There was no more reply on the other side which meant Gary actually nailed his reply.

"Captain, behind that door is heavily guarded. I suggest a reroute to the back door just a few meters east of your position. This isn't Augustus' base, it's a remote research facility studying plant life by the border and he seemed to take it over." Ghost informed after gathering the photos, Gary waited on the edge of the wall covering his Captain's six. The duo proceeded as suggested and climbed over an unguarded fence.

"We're at a greenhouse. Labeled 6." Price whispered.

"Do you see any cameras?" Ghost asked.

"Yeah. Looking at the plants." he muttered.

"Circle around it and find cover behind the safehouse labeled 5. If my German is correct, the central area should have 2 scientists on their way in there." Ghost informed.

"Right on schedule." Price nodded to Roach as they both knocked them down quietly and non-lethally as they were civilians. Gary quickly slung his weapon and hid it behind the huge white lab coat the both of them now wore.

"Keep your weapons hidden, until I say so. Okay?" Price said as he pulled the bodies somewhere hidden. Gary nodded as they confidently waltzed inside the base, using their fake ids pinned on their coats for entry.

Gary watched a lot of sci-fi fics and most of them depicted labs as white walled, glass-divided rooms with hundreds of scientists working on some random machineries. Except here, it's plants. It seemed normal as if they infiltrated the wrong base. Price seemed to worry too, his steps were further apart and he seemed to be in a hurry. They were losing hope on a lead, until one armed guard, different from those outside started climbing up the stairs.

"Finally. Some good news." Price muttered as they made their way up the stairs.

"Authorized personnel only." an armed guard stood by the steps blocking the duos way. It was too crowded and too risky to engage him and press through and they both needed a new plan.

"Es tut mir leid." Gary replied as he pulled Price to the restrooms.

"It's no use. We can't go guns ablazing right here." he noted to his Captain.

"Bollocks." he cursed.

"We need a diversion." He added.

"Way ahead of you, Sir." Gary smirked and showed him his c4 trigger, pushed it and an explosion followed.

"Nice. By the guard house?" Price asked while they waited for reinforcements to assist the blast.

"Yeah."

"Quick thinking lad. I like that."

Several armed men came rushing down the stairs, yelling in a different language, all going to the exit. They stomped to the stairs and carefully breached the second floor of the building, shooting armed tangos using suppressed weapons. They had to act fast and stomp on their comms as soon as they're down so that the others outside will not fall back.

Ten guards were left behind to protect the second floor, and with the help of stealth, Gary and Price took them out smoothly. All that's left are the intel waiting to be harvested.

Gary snapped all possible evidence, every nook and cranny was investigated while Price tapped his heavy fingers on the keyboard.

"Looks like they're going large. They're planting something by the major cities cell towers. Here's one in Berlin." he muttered, printing a copy of the blueprints.

"Price! R-ch" Ghost's static crackled across their comms.

"Th- found- guards!

Get. Out. There. NOW." he added.

"Kill every civilian in there. That will let our little friends out of the shadows. I know they're after us…" a menacing voice said over Roach's stolen receiver.

"Shite. They're killing civvies." Gary said, worried.

"I'm sorry Roach. But we can't save them. It's a trap. Now protect that camera and let's get the fuck out of here." Price consoled as they continued pressing on toward the exit.

Screaming people followed by gunshots echoed across the white halls of the research facility, Gary didn't want to look back, Gary didn't want to hear any more screaming but it was all around him. Whoever commanded this act to be done must be eradicated from this world.

LOCAL MILITIA SETTLEMENT

Alex greeted the duo as soon as they stepped inside the village. It felt lively as everyone was celebrating their victory.

"Captain." Alex nodded and Price returned the gesture with a handshake.

"This is Blitz. Their leader." he added, introducing the man to Price.

"Thank you for helping us." Price acknowledged.

"No. Thank you for helping us. You have good men fighting for a good cause." he remarked, nodding at Alex and Gary. Gary also got acquainted with the leader, exchanged a few words and got offered soup.

"Tough day, huh?" Alex nudged over Gary, who's still sad about the situation earlier.

"You and me, both." Gary muttered as Alex patted his shoulder.

"We'll get him soon enough, Roach. Justice will be served." Alex consoled as Gary took a deep sigh.

"They're planting EMP bombs on major cell towers. Maybe incorporating it with them to perform large scale blasts." Gary pondered, taking a sip off the delicious soup.

"Yeah. That's our go signal. It's now a terror activity. Imagine a day without communication. International trade would crumble." Alex explained to which Gary nodded in agreement.

"Global cripple. People's minds get hurt, Economy gets hurt and we aren't focused enough to defend ourselves."

"That's what he's up to." Gary finished.

"And we have to stop it. Whatever It Takes." Alex looked at Gary with determination, that kind of pep talk that makes him a little less sad.

"Yeah." Gary agreed.

~

Another briefing, but this time, it was going somewhere. Operation Burn, the task is to eliminate Nero and all his allies, if possible. Funny enough, the real Nero burned everyone else. Whoever thought of this name was smart enough to connect the dots.

There's another person added to the team, the redhead leather jacket agent, Alexandra Ryder. An interpol agent tasked to destroy all traces of said EMP machinery. She looks tough, acts tough and basically is tough. France seemed to be going along well with her. That's a bonus for alliances such as these.

"So, I heard Price noted your sniper improvement." Ghost nudged.

"Yeah. Thanks Simon. Your training sucks but it helped a lot." Gary complimented.

"Tried talking to France and the new girl today." Ghost reported. Gary turned to him, clearly interested about his story.

"It was actually good. They're both intimidated by the mask and that's why they can't initiate conversation with me. But the talk went pretty well so I guess you needed to update your scoreboard or something." He muttered.

Gary chuckled. "That's one step towards her."

"I'll let the Interpol handle Berlin. Since it involves just the weapon, as for other news. I think it's time to transfer our two hostages back to the USA." Gary quickly turned his head back to the screen. No. It can't be. He had to stop this decision.

"With all due respect sir. I do not agree with this!" Gary stood up and all eyes were on him. He's still concerned about the welfare of the two plus he didn't want Maxine to leave. Not yet.

"I've read the report on their case sir. And it's not that I don't trust the system there but what if there's still another one in there with ties to Nero. He was able to slip by under our noses once or more times than that but let's consider the possibilities here." Gary explained as he looked around. Alex seemed to agree with him.

Shepherd let out a soft sigh.

"We'll discuss this possibility Sgt. Sanderson. You can sit down now." he said and resumed briefing.

"Brave move you did there, soldier." Ghost remarked as Gary let out a sigh. He wasn't sure on he's really concerned, the IP Address being extracted from Samantha or Maxine's smile that he will be missing if she left.

Next Chapter : The Heart Knows what the Brain doesn't

Notification Squad, my beloved

@samatedeansbroccoli @smokeywhalee @whimsywispsblog @enderio @beemybee @ricinbach

[rangikuxmatsumoto]

While Rangiku was back in the Soul Society, an envelope laid on her desk amongst the piles of neglected paperwork. Her name was written in pencil with a studded star next to it. Inside was a letter sprayed with familiar cologne and a faint smell of coffee. "Hey Ran, So I started my training with Urahara a while ago, and it's been pretty good. Well, rough and scary and exhausting and I thought I was a goner many times, but still good. I'm getting stronger and more badass every day. If my new powers aren't enough to impress you, then you should see my muscles! You're gonna be all over me next time~ I've had to change my schedule drastically for my training. I've had to cancel some bookings and make the gigs less frequent. It's easy enough to lie to the fans and say that I'm working on some new original material, but lying to my bandmates is a bit trickier. I tried saying that I was working on some certifications in case I wanted to get some type of job. I hope they buy it and don't ask too many questions. Also, I guess what I told the fans was more like a half-truth. I'm still playing bass and coming up with stuff when I have the time to rest and when I have the rarer time to jam with the band. It's what's kept me sane while doing whatever that weird crazy hat dude wants. But music's not the only thing keeping me alive: you are. I think about you and our memories more than my cuts and bruises and back pain, and being able to see you again and keep myself safe from these Hollows makes this living hell worth it. Soon, I'll be able kick so much Hollow ass that your squad will be jealous. Might even be a hero for once instead of a grumpy asshole. I love you, I miss you so much, and we'll see each other again soon. -Katsu Matsumoto" @katsu-at-the-bottom

Upon her desk heavily laden with reports and paperwork, her hand shifted stacks of assignments – she was literally paper-pushing – and there was no end in sight. Her time off had consequences and it came in the form of disorganized piles of paperwork all needing her signature, her review, her sign off and approval. It had been said there were only two things certain in life – death and taxes, well, that was half true…but for her it was death and overdue paperwork.

As her pen moved solely by muscle memory at the end of the report, her scrawled signature was nothing more than a visible ‘R’ and ‘M’ separated by some squiggles – nothing like her normally elegant handwriting. But this was probably the hundredth report she had signed off on today, there was no time. The signed off report was shoved to the side as her left hand snatched the next piece of paper from the never-ending pile, but as she drew it in front of her, she found that it wasn’t a report at all but an envelope.

Her pen which at this point had become an extension of her hand dropped as she eased back drawing the envelope close. Her nail tucked under the flap, gliding across the edge to open the envelope only to be met with a welcomed and familiar fragrance that instantly tugged at her heart.

Drawing out the folded piece of paper her gaze slowly read over the handwritten update from Katsu. A flicker of a smile formed and fell as he updated her on his ongoing training and changes to his life. They had parted this last time with a plan, with a way to make things work for them and seemed that although there were necessary trials and tribulations – things were working out.

A soft contented sigh escaped her as she allowed the letter to flutter to the desk’s surface. Fingers lightly running over the edge as she reread bits and pieces. Her mood was indeed uplifted now and while she didn’t want to get back to signing her (after)life away – she had a refreshed purpose.

[sunshines-archistudentblr]

26.07.2020

-Restart-

Hello everyone! I hope you're having a nice summer so far!

Day 0 ||60-day personal summer studying challenge

Our exam season of September schedule has been announced, thus officially letting me know I should start studying for it. Till this day, I took a small break from Tumblr and now I'm back and ready. I've been doing some Italian and I've progressed a bit (a small snippet of my notes). I read quite a bit (got the new Cassandra Clare and Suzanne Collins books) and I'm currently waiting to get a new laptop since the one I have is old and slow. I made some stuff on AutoCAD today and I tested some plots. Till I have the new machine, I'll be doing some 3rd semester building details. Hopefully I'll finish this by the end of this week when the new laptop will have arrived (most likely) and then I'll have to set it up with everything and finally I'll be able to work normally and with no delays again. I started a new bullet journal as well (I start mine during summer because that's when I have time to prepare ahead) and I could show you some spreads if you'd like to see them. Trying to refuel my creativity and motivation but it seems a bit impossible. I don't want to jinx anything, positive thoughts, we'll get through this.

This challenge is going to end in exactly 60 days, starting tomorrow till the day of my last exam in September. Updates will probably be daily or once every two days if nothing interesting has happened XP.

[fangirlmami]

The Diciserys (Monsta X)

I’ll be updating this story on Wattpad. You can also find student advisor notes on there. I could not put the whole chapter into one post, so I’ve shared the link below. (btw, the app is much better than the website)

Description: Vera Clarke has been accepted to the most prestigious university of sorcery, located on the small Scottish island, Vatersay, with a population of less than a hundred residents. Disguised as a normal university, anyone can apply to it and study different majors in different areas like Science, Business, and so on, but only those possessing magical abilities are accepted to the school and double major in sorcery and a mundane study of their choosing. Vera is the first in her family to ever accomplish such a feat. Bright-eyed and ready to make a name for herself, she quickly learns that fitting in will be the hardest challenge of all. At a university where coming from a bloodline of extremely powerful, renowned sorcerers is almost always essential, she will have to fight tooth and nail to build a reputation for herself. Luckily, when a bubbly Korean sorcerer takes her under his wing, she finds herself among a group of peers that completely turn her life around. What they uncover in the process will change Vatersay University (of Sorcery) forever.

Chapter 1: Welcome to Vatersay University of Sorcery

Word count: 2,496

After a 13 hour flight from Boston to Glasgow, a 3 hour train ride, and 4 hours on a ferry, Vera made it to Vatersay University of Sorcery. She gazed up at the campus with stars in her eyes. She had spent all of her life dreaming of attending the 300 year old school and making a name for herself, something no one in her family had ever accomplished. She walked up the stone path to the quadrangle where booths were set up for the incoming students. She approached one a young woman sat behind, who appeared to be a student herself. She gave a wide grin and said with a French accent, "Welcome to Vatersay! May I have your name?"

"Vera Clarke. C-l-a-r-k-e." The young woman skimmed through the list of names laid out before her.

"Ah! Here you are! You are a first-year correct?"

"Correct. I'll be staying at the Greenleaf Residence Hall."

"Yes, yes. It is to your left." Vera looked toward the left and saw that it was between to other residence halls. "You are in room 201 along with Isolde Jansen. Your resident supervisor will give you your key." The student welcomer grabbed a basket from under the booth and handed it to her. "It just has some chocolates, informational pamphlets, and a map. The official welcoming ceremony will be at 7 o'clock, tomorrow morning. You can meet up with your student advisor then if you'd like to swap, add, or drop any classes from your schedule."

Vera nodded her head and thanked her. "Take care."

She walked over to the residence hall and up the first flight of steps to the second floor, admiring the antique décor. Her room was the first to the left, it's door wide open, so she hauled her luggage into it.

"Vera?" A short and petite blonde asked.

"That's me. You must be Isolde."

"That I am!" She smiled sweetly while extending her hand toward Vera. Vera took it and shook it. "It's nice to meet you."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, too. Where are you from?"

"Belgium, in the Flemish region."

"Oh cool, I've always wanted to visit Belgium, but that's mainly because my dream husband is Romelu Lukaku."

Isolde laughed. "Who wouldn't fall in love with those strong thighs of his?"

"Exactly!" Vera giggled.

"My older brother also attends this school, he's in year four."

"Let me guess, you guys aren't the only one's in your bloodline to have attended this school."

"You got that right. Both of our parents, our parents' parents, and our parents' parents' parents attended."

"You lost me at the second mention of parents," Vera joked.

"What about you? Where do you hail from?"

"I'm from the U.S., more specifically, Massachusetts. Unlike most of the students at this school, I'm not the descendant of renowned sorcerers. If it weren't for my grandmother, I wouldn't even know how to do sorcery."

"Oh." Isolde sounded disappointed, and Vera quickly picked up on the change of her tone.

"However, I didn't get into this school for nothing. I'm a fast learner and a good sorceress. I suppose that's why I was never good at mundane classes, but always did well when learning new spells."

"Of course." She gave a weak smile. "Well, if you need help with anything, let me know."

"Will do, thanks."

Isolde left the room, leaving Vera on her own. She began unpacking and putting her clothes in the empty wardrobe at the foot of her bed which faced the door. She then placed her school supplies on her desk and began putting sheets on her bed when she heard a knock on the door. She looked back to find a cheerful man with dark blond, slightly wavy hair, his bangs almost covering his almond shaped eyes. "Vera and Isolde?" He had a bit of an accent that she could not place.

"I'm Vera. Isolde left."

He walked up to her, handing her a pair of gold colored, skeleton keys. "Make sure to give her one, please."

"Will do."

"I am Minhyuck, by the way. I will be your resident advisor for this school year."

"Oh okay. Nice to meet you!"

"Nice to meet you, too! Are you new to the school?"

"Yes, it's my first year attending university."

"On behalf of the student body, I want to welcome you. You will absolutely love it here! There's something for everyone. The only downside to this place is the lack of cuisines, but other than that, it's pretty great!"

"So, I've heard! That's why I always dreamt of coming here."

"Who hasn't, really? Will you be coming to our residence hall party tonight?"

"I didn't even know about it."

"You must come! It's important that you meet your peers. If you get bored, I'll be there to lift your mood."

Vera giggled, saying, "In that case, I will definitely be there."

"Awesome! It's on the first floor in the common room. I'll see you there at 8. If you need anything in the meantime, I'm in room 310."

"Okay, I'll see you then."

Minhyuck shot finger guns at her before leaving. Vera found him to be an interesting character, but good looking nonetheless. She continued fixing up her bed and then proceeded to select an outfit for later.

~~~

Vera and Isolde entered the common room together, surveying the area. Music was blasting as students drank from beer bottles, mingling. A brunette immediately approached Isolde with her arms outstretched for a hug.

"It's so good to see you!" she exclaimed.

"You didn't tell me you were staying in Greenleaf. Had I known, I would have visited you hours ago."

"You didn't tell me you were staying here, either," she laughed. Her eyes darted back and forth from Isolde to Vera, as if she were waiting for an introduction.

"Oh, this is Vera. Vera, this is Madeleine. She's from Québec, Canada."

"I'm from the famous Vernau family," Madeleine continued.

"Can't say I've heard of your family," Vera replied.

"My great-great grandfather Jean-Louis Vernau helped globalize this school." Vera shook her head, unclear on who he was. "He was a pioneer in helping blend different sorcery practices from all over the world together."

"Oh yeah, Jean-Louis. Duh!" she laughed nervously since she definitely had no idea who he was. The girls laughed along with her.

"What family do you come from?" That was a question Vera was dreading after the way Isolde reacted earlier; she felt that it would be best not to disclose her lineage with anyone at the school. However, it felt that it was almost mandatory that she do so.

"I'm from the Clarke family, and no, no one from my family has attended this school, or any school of sorcery at all. Well, not that I know of."

"Oh." Madeleine sounded just like Isolde when she found out that Vera was basically a nobody among them. Her smile faded and her eyes slowly made their way to Isolde's. "Come on, Isolde. Let me introduce you to some people." She took her hand and began dragging her away. Isolde looked back at Vera with pity, before conversing with a group of students.

Vera sighed, telling herself, "I should have known this would happen." Unfazed, she made her way to the snack table and picked up some hors d'œuvres to munch on.

"Vera?" She turned around to see who was calling her. "Hi again!" Minhyuck greeted. Beside him stood a shorter man, almost sporting the same hairdo as Minhyuck, except it was his natural, dark brown hair color. "This is Changkyun; he's a first year just like you." Changkyun waved a hand at Vera, and she did the same in return.

"And like me, he's from Korea, but he's travelled the world with his family."

"Not really," Changkyun corrected with a slightly deep voice. "I just lived in Massachusetts then Israel for a bit."

Finally, she had something in common with someone. "I'm from Massachusetts!"

"Really? I was staying in Boston. Is that where you're from?"

"Sort of. I grew up in the suburbs west of it."

"Ah, okay."

"I'm hoping the winters will be kinder here, but the ocean is basically at this campus' doorstep." The group laughed.

"What classes are you taking?"

"The Science of Magic, Ancient Languages of Sorcery, Light Manipulation, and then for my mundane degree, I'm taking Global Studies courses."

"I'm taking The Science of Magic, too. My first class is tomorrow morning after the welcoming ceremony."

"It's seems like we'll be in the same class."

"Cool; we can cheat off of each other," he joked. "I actually know some ancient languages of sorcery, so if you ever need help, I am at your service."

"That's very kind of you. It's good to know not everyone is bothered by the fact that I don't come from magical royalty."

"None of that stuff matters," Minhyuck started. "You weren't accepted here for your pedigree, you were accepted for your talent in sorcery, which is something your classmates should be afraid of."

"Looks like we'll be going head to head," said Changkyun. "Up for a bit of friendly competition?"

"Always!"

The group spent the rest of the party chatting it up and drinking, except for Vera. She was never good at handling alcohol. As the party drew to an end, she traded numbers with the boys and returned to her room with Isolde, who was acting as if she hadn't abandoned Vera at the party.