#i'm going to eat my keyboard i cannot do this

[wren-writes-stuff]

From Under The Desk

JaycexFem!Reader

Modern College AU

You have a paper due at midnight. A very important one. You absolutely CANNOT afford to be distracted.

Jayce distracts you.

Warnings: 18+ (this is basically just smut without plot tbh.) Reader is AFAB. Oral sex, cunnilingus, descriptions of genitalia. Small age gap? Like, only a year or two. Does that count? Idk let me know if i missed something <3

You scrubbed a hand across your face, exhaustion tugging at your eyes. It wasn't actually that late- it was only about seven pm. But, you'd stayed up all of last night writing this damned paper, only to go and spend a full day in class afterwards. And now here you were, hunched over your desk like a vulture pecking at your keyboard.

Getting the words down was the easy part. It was making them make sense that made your brain hurt. The amount of words you'd back-spaced over was probably comparable to the ones you'd actually kept.

You took a swig of your energy drink, wincing as the carbonation hit the back of your throat. You don't know why you bothered honestly; it wasn't doing anything for you at this point.

It was then that you heard the lock on the front door click, and the telltale shuffling sounds of someone entering your tiny apartment.

"I'm home!"

You heard Jayce's muffled voice through your bedroom door, but you made no effort to tear your attention away from your computer screen.

"Hon?" You heard him call again, "You home?"

More shuffling. Then, he knocked softly on the door before opening it. "Hon?" He repeated.

"Hey," you said automatically, fingers still flying across your keyboard.

"Hey, you." You could hear the smile in his voice, and it made your stomach flutter a little. "I picked up some takeout for dinner- I even got those little crab rangoons you love."

In your head, you meant to say something like, 'Wow! Thank you, my love. Im so excited to eat my favorite food with you!' But you didn't, leaving only an awkward pause in the back and forth you could barely call a conversation. You scrolled back to the top of your paper to re-read it, skimming for mistakes. Ah- there's a typo here. It should be "perceived", not-

"Hey, are you okay? Did you hear me?"

"What?" You bristled a little bit, annoyed to have been interrupted. You finally turned around to acknowledge him, trying to hide your chagrin. "Oh...sorry. Um, thank you. That was thoughtful."

It had taken a moment to force your eyes to focus on him, after staring at a bright screen for so long. When they did, you found he looked significantly more chipper than you felt. That made sense, you supposed. He had been freed from the confines of student life already, no longer bogged down by trivial things like homework and exams. Lucky bastard.

His eyes grazed across your face, then the rest of your body- and stopped when he found something interesting.

"You're wearing my hoodie,". He said. Irritation clawed at your stomach, and you swallowed the 'so what?' rising in your throat. You really just wanted to get back to work.

"It's comfy," you said instead, shrugging. "Sorry. I hoped you wouldn't mind. Do you want it back?" He shook his head, starting towards you.

"No, it looks good on you. Keep it on." He leaned down to peck you on the cheek, and you smiled tiredly at him. His hair was slightly tousled from a long day at work, and his chiseled cheekbones were smeared with grease. His cologne was mixed with the smell of coal and something vaguely chemical. Truthfully, what you really wanted was to yank off the hoodie, and his clothes too, and pull him into the shower with you- but there was no time for that now. You swiveled your chair around again, going back to your work.

"Im sorry," you said, "This paper is due in a couple of hours and I need to get it done. You should go ahead and eat if you're hungry. You don't have to wait. And please take a shower."

"What?" He teased, "You don't like the smell of hydraulic fluid?" He wrapped his arms around you and dropped his chin on top of your head. You found it difficult to keep yourself upright under his immense weight.

"No, I don't," you huffed. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to be rude, but I need to focus on this. But once I'm done, I'm yours for the rest of the night, okay?"

The weight was lifted as he moved away from you, chuckling. "Alright, Alright. I'll leave you to it. God, it's kinda hot when you're mean to me. Maybe you should do that more often."

You swatted his arm, staring incredulously, and he ducked away as he laughed again. "I'm not being mean to you. I thought I was being pretty polite all things considered."

"You are mean to me," he whined. "You wont even let me give you my love and attentioonnn." He gave you fake puppy dog eyes, and you snatched a pencil off your desk, holding it up like you were going to chuck it at him.

"Get out," you warned. He held up his hands in surrender and backed out the door, eyes full of mirth.

"I bet you'd be nicer to me if you ate something."

You threw the pencil as hard as you could, but he shut the door before it reached him, and it bounced off the wood instead. You heard him cackling on the other side, before you heard his heavy footsteps move away.

You huffed, running your fingers through your hair. It was greasy, and in need of a good combing-through. You hadn't really had time for a shower yourself; but it could wait a little longer. You went back to your pecking.

Too soon, you heard the bedroom door open again. "Back already?" You asked mechanically.

"Already?" He repeated. "It's been like an hour." You glanced at the clock on the bottom corner of your screen. He was right. You'd been so focused that you didn't realize how long it had been.

"Whoops." You still didn't cease your typing.

You felt his weight upon you the same as before, forcing a wheeze from your lungs. "Why are you so heavy?" You huffed.

He chuckled, and you felt the vibrations against your back. The two of you stayed there like that for a moment, and you rubbed your eyes again. His warmth was comforting, and dangerously cozy. You were going to fall asleep at this rate. You shrugged, trying to get him to move off of you- but he didn't budge. Instead, he pressed his face into your neck, and his hair tickled your cheek. It was still damp, and you could smell his shampoo- like mint, and something darker, more earthy. You tilted your head to kiss the top of his own, breathing in the scent; but never taking your eyes away from your computer.

"Your food's getting cold, love." His breath tickled your skin, giving you butterflies again. "You should come eat something. You'll feel better."

"Can't," you muttered. Even if you wanted to, the caffeine you'd been chugging all day dampened your appetite, despite your empty stomach. He was probably right, but if you stopped now, you might not be able to start again. You had to capitalize on your focus; you couldn't afford to lose it.

Jayce brushed his lips against your jaw, pressing little kisses into the bone, and down your neck. He trailed a hand down your arm, the one opposite to him, and slipped it across your thigh, into the space between your legs-

'What do you think you're doing?" He stood up straight, taking his hand back. You glared at him, half annoyed, and half aroused. It was only now that you realized he wasn't wearing a shirt- just a pair of sweatpants that accentuated his girth in just the right way. You could see every muscle he worked so hard to build on full display, and your breath hitched. His tanned skin was just as damp as his hair, still shining with water. You wondered if he'd even bothered to dry off when he got out of the shower.

"I'm sorry. I can stop if you really want me to," he said gently. He looked down at you with something on his face you couldn't quite read. He wasn't frowning, nor smiling. His eyebrows were quirked upward just slightly, eyes half lidded. His expression was somewhere between lust and fatigue, you decided. Maybe he'd had a long day, too.

You blinked, trying to keep your eyes open. Maybe you didn't want him to stop- but you had to get this done if you had any hope of graduating next semester. You couldn't afford to fail this class. You looked away from him, feeling torn. In the corner of your eye, you watched him kneel beside you, and felt the weight of his head in your lap. He slid his hands around your waist, one of them between you and the back of your chair, and the other across your lap.

"You don't have to stop," you said quietly. "But I can't, either. This is important."

"Is that what you want though? For me to keep going, I mean?"

You nodded, swallowing thickly. "I do. I just need you to understand that I'm not ignoring you to be mean; I don't want to hurt your feelings because I'm not being an active participant."

He lifted his head, shifting himself between your legs. He had to duck and curl himself up awkwardly to fit himself underneath your desk- it was kind of cute, actually, watching him trying to fit his giant shoulders and long legs into such a tight space.

"I don't think that at all," he said when he was finally comfortable. "I know this it's important to you." He slid his hands up your thighs, letting one of his thumbs land on the spot where he knew your clit to be. He stroked it gently through the fabric of your pants, and you bit your lip to stop the gasp trapped in your throat. His other hand grasped your hip, massaging the soft malleable flesh of your curves with his thumb. He rested his cheek on your knee, looking up at you lovingly.

"You just seem so stressed," he said. "I wanna help you relax." He punctuated his words by swiveling his hand around, sliding his fingers under the curve of your pelvis. Well, 'relaxed' isn't the word you would use to describe yourself right now. A coil had wound itself inside your stomach, and your legs were tense with anticipation. In his hands, you were putty. You couldn't think straight anymore. You tried to focus, tried to keep your eyes on the prize. You were almost done here. Just a couple more paragraphs to go, and then you could-

"Oh-" you gasped involuntarily, something girlish and high pitched. Your face burned with embarrassment- you'd never made a noise like that before. But you couldn't help it- not with the way he was sliding his fingers into you now. You hadn't even realized he had managed to tug your pants down enough to expose you to him.

His other hand, previously on your hip, had slid up your sweater. It was on the small of your back now, pressing you forward. He drew his fingers out of you, slowly, and you bucked your hip forwards with a groan. He was moving so, so slowly. He was being so gentle and sweet, you thought your teeth were going to rot and fall out of your skull. He leaned forward, kissing your stomach, moving down to the side- to your hip, in the crease of your skin where your pelvis met your thigh. You shivered; his lips brushed you so lightly it tickled a bit. Your fingertips buzzed with electricity as you tried to keep typing. But then you felt his tongue sliding between your folds and you couldn't do it anymore.

You let your eyes flutter shut, letting him finally overtake your thoughts completely. You buried your face in your hands, trying to control your ragged breathing as he moved his tongue up, and down, slowly, gently. He pushed his tongue inside of you, lapping at you like he hadn't had a drop to drink in days. You whined, sliding a hand under the desk to grab his hair, to bring him closer to you. You could hear him panting, feel his breath against your pubic mound. His movements grew more desperate at your touch, ever eager to please.

You laid your other arm on the table, resting your head on it like a pillow. You really couldn't stop the sounds escaping from you now. Every gasp, moan, and whimper from you only seemed to further spur him, urging him to move faster. He alternated between fucking you with his tongue, reaching as far inside of you as he could manage, and moving back up to lick tiny circles around your clit.

You moved your hips with his rhythm, desperate for more friction as you felt yourself growing closer and closer to the edge. "Jayce," you whispered shakily, "I-I'm really- mmmfh- close-"

He didn't let up even a little bit, even when you leaned back, pushing his head against you so hard you were worried he'd suffocate. You were almost blinded by pleasure, the coil winding itself tighter and tighter- until it finally snapped.

You cried out his name like a prayer, over and over again as you shook. You clamped your thighs around his ears, wrapping your legs together over his shoulders. You tugged on his hair like it was a lifeline, feeling every crashing tidal wave of your orgasm in full force as your back arched away from your chair. You practically sobbed, your eyes watering. You couldn't help it. It was so good.

He finally stopped when he sensed you'd had enough, slumping in your chair like a rag doll as exhaustion racked your brain through the afterglow. He pulled back, his face shiny with spit and slick. You smiled at him, before letting your head flop back as you closed your eyes.

'That was hot," he whispered. You snorted, not opening your eyes. You felt his fingers brush your skin as he pulled your pants back up, and shivered slightly when the cold wet fabric of your underwear met your overly-sensitive groin. You pressed your toes against the floor to push your chair from under the table so he'd have room to get out.

"That didn't take very long, either" he teased. "You must have been pretty pent up." You heard shuffling as he stood, and you finally opened your eyes when you felt his lips brush against your forehead. You flicked his shoulder.

"You're just good at what you do."

He smiled, his eyes flickering across your face. You reached up to rub your thumb across his chin, trying to wipe off some of the remaining fluids. He grabbed your wrist and pressed a kiss into your palm before you could withdraw it, never taking his eyes off of you.

"Come eat something, please," he whispered. You sighed and glanced at the clock again, considering it- it was almost 9:15. There was still time.

"Alright, alright," you resigned. "Give me five minutes, and I'll be right there."

Jayce made a face you couldn't discern, and let go of your hand. "Okay," he said, and stepped out of the room.

He came back ten minutes later to find you still at your computer. "I couldn't wait any longer," he said- making you jump.

"Augh, I'm sorry, Jayce," you said- and you meant it.

"It's okay," he shrugged, "I had a feeling this might happen. You get so sucked in sometimes. It's endearing, actually."

He set two styrofoam boxes next to you, and opened another for himself. "I thought I would just bring dinner in here. Maybe I could help you edit? Make things go a little faster so we can get you in the shower?" He smirked, sitting on the edge of the bed. It was lodged into the corner of the room, with the desk beside it like an oversized nightstand. There'd be no room to move about, otherwise.

You cracked open the first box, choosing to ignore his quip, and your mouth watered at the sight of your favorite food inside. Ugh, even cold it smelled amazing. You shoveled it into your face with the flimsy plastic fork, newfound hunger making itself evident. You looked to Jayce, intending to thank him for the meal; but you found he was looking at you expectantly.

'What?" You asked through a mouthful of food.

"Did you want my help?"

Oh.

You swallowed.

"Sorry. Um, yes. That might be nice honestly. I could use a break."

He set his food aside, chuckling. "The first one wasn't enough?" He teased. You scowled, only pretending to be upset.

"Whatever man. Switch me places." You stood up to give him your chair, and he complied- though he had to pull the lever under the seat to lower it, to make room for his mile-long legs.

"Alright, let's see, here..."He squinted as he read your work, and you took the opportunity to admire him. God, he really was incredibly handsome. His long, calloused fingers looked enormous over your keyboard compared to your own. His bulky shoulders hunched forward, pulling the skin of his back taught over his muscles. You bit your lip, feeling your arousal coming back through your fatigue. He glanced at you, and you blushed when you caught him staring; as if you hadn't been together long enough by now that this wasn't embarrassing. But he still never failed to give you the warm-and-fuzzies so to speak. He smiled, laughing through his nose.

"What're you looking at?"

You twirled your hair with exaggeration. "Oh, yknow. Just this cute guy I have a crush on, or whatever," you flirted. He rolled his eyes, still grinning to himself.

"Eat your food, dork." He looked back to the screen, and you did what you were told.

It didn't take long. You wolfed down your dinner so fast you even surprised yourself. You stood to collect your trash, and kissed the top of Jayce's head before heading to the kitchen to dispose of it properly. When you came back, he was already standing up to stretch.

"It looks good to me," he said- with his arms over his head, his obliques were in full view and it made you just about weak in the knees. "I think it's ready to submit, if you're happy with it."

You thought about re-reading it one more time- just to be sure- but your brain was so foggy with exhaustion (and maybe some arousal). You trusted Jayce's judgement, too. He'd graduated summa cum laude last year, after all. You were sure he knew what he was talking about.

"Thank you, love. I really appreciate your help." You patted his chest with a weary smile, and sat down to submit it. When you were finally able to click your laptop shut, you were just about to collapse. You looked over to find Jayce already waiting for you in bed, and he opened his arms for you.

"C'mere, you," he crooned softly. You complied, shutting off the table lamp before you crawled across the blankets to meet him. He pulled them over the two of you, pressing a gentle kiss on your forehead. You buried your face in his chest, breathing in the scent of mint and clean bedsheets. You suddenly felt self conscious, remembering you had forgotten to bathe.

You sat up. "I'm gonna take a shower real quick actually-" but he yanked you back down before you could move, burying his nose in your hair.

"Nooooo," he mumbled. "Stay with me."

"Jaaaayce," you whined, "I smell terrible. Wouldn't you rather I got cleaned up before bed?"

He didn't move, keeping you pinned between his arms. "Mmm, girl stink."

"You- what?" You sputtered, laughing at the absurdity. You tried to move, but he was already snoring softly. You couldn't tell if he was faking it or not, but you gave in anyway. You tangled your legs with his, letting his warmth overtake you and carry you to sleep at last.

[rileys-battlecats]

micaclan tumblr dash simulator

☁️ the-fluffiest-puddle follow

I cannot believe the things my friends talk me into. on an unrelated note where can you hide a baby coyote

#puddletalks #seriously where did they find that thing #and WHY did they keep it??

(3 notes)

⭐️ larkstar-unofficial follow

if you catch prey and eat it before bringin anything back to the clan i'll kill you on sight <3 many such cases, unfortunately

🌠 larkstar-official follow

Laureltail I know this is you. I've told you twice now to delete this blog. Meet me in my den this evening, we're having a talk

⭐️ larkstar-unofficial follow

chat i think im going to die tonight

#remember me #never forget my sacrifice

(24 notes)

🐆 speckled-trees-and-autumn-leaves follow

people looove to ask me "oh birchspeckle tell me the future, will the clan thrive this greenleaf, will i find a mate that loves me" but then the SECOND i tell them the exact time and date of their death suddenly I'M the bad guy?? like ok sweaty you're the one that was after forbidden knowledge you don't get to be choosy about what you learn

#justmedicinecatthings #seriously they get so upset when they learn this stuff like. how do you think i feel? #i just gotta sit on this information forever? im not allowed to vent?? #this is why i never hang out in the camp smh

(1 note)

🐦‍⬛ muddy-paws follow

anybody else finding the torment relentless

(0 notes)

💊 owlpounce-official follow

This is your reminder to stretch before partaking in any strenuous activity! The best way to stay healthy and happy is to take steps to avoid being hurt in the first place. Stretching first may seem like a waste of time, but I promise it's much better to spend a few minutes stretching your legs before hunting than to spend a few days in the medicine den recovering from a pulled muscle!

#PSA #selfcare #safe practices

(15 notes)

🍐 having-a-peary-good-day follow

I don't want to name any names, but I feel like we as a clan have an issue with delegation of labor when it comes to the care of our most vulnerable members. Watching the kits is all well and good, but as the only current queen in the nursery right now, I find myself doing so much repair work for the den walls all by myself. Nominally, our apprentices ought to be doing much of this work, but quite frankly, our 'paws simply don't have the necessary experience to fix the more delicate areas, and I have ended up redoing much of their work myself. This isn't to disparage our apprentices, they've been doing their best, but I have ideas as to how we might better address these issues as a clan.

Keep reading

#genuinely I think we could be doing this so much more efficiently #like I understand that the 'paws need the learning experience #but not at the cost of our kitten's warmth and safety #you know? #and that's not even mentioning the elder's den

(7 notes)

💫 swooping-hawk-rising-star follow

fffksnkd. Ssssssksdjsj,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,h

🪷 white-tipped-tail follow

You ok, Hawkpaw?

💫 swooping-hawk-rising-star follow

COYOTE PUP ON MY KEYBOARD

#HELP

(4 notes)

🦊 foxjaw-official follow

The dawn patrol spotted bear tracks this morning just past the northeastern border, near the old hemlock tree. The tracks were old, and did not lead into Micaclan territory. Be that as it may, remember to remain on guard, and to travel in groups of 3 or more until it can be confirmed that the bear has not remained close by.

#PSA #patrol reports

(15 notes)

🏞️ gullys-tuft follow

Why is Sandleap retching into the bushes

#should i really be asking? #do i even want to know?

(2 notes)

🌸 resting-on-your-laurels follow

gonna stuff a frog inside a squirrel for my morning meal. surf and terf

🌸 resting-on-your-laurels follow

dont do this

🔥 embers-and-sparks follow

you can't tell me what to do

🔥 embers-and-sparks follow

dont do this

🏜️ pocket-sand follow

It can't be that bad!

🏜️ pocket-sand follow

dont do this

#the texture #its so bad #i dont want to waste prey but. i dont think i can swallow this #not pogchamp

(13 notes)

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[twilghtkoo]

hello i absolutely love your works! can i please kindly request a haechan drabble with this prompt 🥺 no pressure! thank you and stay safe! 🩷

pairings. streamer!haechan x streamer!reader (f)

genre. fluff, established relationship

warnings. gamer!haechan, short drabble :/

notes. LOVE THIS ANON *starts smashing keyboard*

[ masterlist | haechan masterlist ]

-

"chat, i cannot express this enough, but do not date a gamer. okay?" you joke facing the camera, as your gamer boyfriend is tugging your arm with light force.

he had walked into your streaming room, knowing you were streaming tonight. when you both are streaming it's an unspoken rule to not bother each other, but neither of you get upset if one walks in just to greet each other or to give a kiss goodbye if one of you are leaving the house.

but that's not the case right now, because haechan walked in with an empty stomach and asking when you were going to cook dinner.

your stream chat was going crazy when they saw your boyfriend walk into your room behind you.

haechan scoffs behind you, chuckling. "yah, what do you mean?"

you burst out laughing, his grip on your forearm loosening but you link your fingers with his before he drops his hand.

"i'm almost done, i'll end the stream in about an hour and i'll cook. what do you feel like eating?" you look up at him from your chair.

he ponders a bit before answering he wants spam fried rice.

"ok, sounds good. can you make the rice, can you at least do that?" you ask him with raised eyebrows.

he sucks his teeth, nudging you with the hand that's holding yours. "of course i can."

he leans down to show his face to your camera. "hi chat, be nice to my baby, my love, my little chef, my- ow!" he hisses, rubbing the top of his head where you smacked him.

"okay, okay, i'm going, but one more thing..." he smiles.

you huff out of slight annoyance, but it's all love. and he knows that.

"yes, hyuck?"

"do you know how to whistle?"

you tilt your head, confused at the random question. "i feel like i showed you i can't, look." and then you pucker your lips out and you attempt to blow out air to whistle but haechan's lips are on yours in a matter of seconds then he runs out your room giggling.

you blink, slowly turning your head to stare at your monitor and glancing at the chat.

you let out a breathy laugh, ignoring how red your cheeks look on camera. "like i said, don't date gamers kids."

user haechan is an exception !!

user LMAO mans got rizz

you nod slowly, grinning. "yes, haechan is an exception."

[starsoftheeye]

TMagP 17 Reaction

Pre-Episode

I've discovered that acting disinterested literally makes the episodes show up earlier on my youtube account, so I've gotta play mindgames on this app every thursday to get to see the episodes less than half an hour after they release lol

Pre-Statement

Ah Celia is back on her bullshit

Wait did she just nearly get ran over???

I feel bad for laughing at her but her only reaction being "Oh for gods sake" is super funny to me how long has she been doing this

oh hi sam

oh god she missed their date :[

something tells me a habit is going to be made of this, especially considering she literally cannot help it

"it really wasn't" yeah no wonder you nearly became roadkill

theyre so cute i love them

ooh shes mad

Statement

"catalyst" huh, have we heard that before or is this the first time

pfft not the interviewer getting read to shreds

wild theory before i keep going, based on the title "saved copy" and the "identity crisis", "existential horror", "temporal distortion" and "captivity" tags, im going to assume that this person going to therapys having the details of their life copied somewhere for something to replicate and replace them, and the doctors gonna attempt to get rid of them but obviously it didnt work. either that or the guy outside the office does something

as someone whos never done meditation before this is not encouraging me to start

ah office spaces, the worst of cosmic horror

wait did they get teleported or something

tbf if my taxi driver started driving completely the wrong way i'd assume the worst and start "exchanging words" too

oh my god was i right

wait is this copy based on their therapy, a version of themselves with no problems whatsoever? and is this gonna be a "there can only be one" type scenario?

oh wait no i forgot siblings exist

wait nvm them having the same name is weird

"dates and times" so this is where the temporal distortion comes in ig

yup

i'm sticking with the "rich-darrien is a copy trying to assimilate into og-darriens life" theory for now

yeah because thats not normal darrien, even if youre related no-one looks completely identical apart from glasses, teeth colour and a lack of a beer-gut

do they both think the other is the copy, or does sharron just not know?

oh god what is he hiding

does he beat up a real person every time hes upset

of course it was his father that makes sense

oh my god the sound design

oh my god he's the one who assimilated thats so cool

good for sharron i hope shes doing okay

off-topic but i love the way the voices get more real as the statement goes on then go back to their more robotic tone at the end

Post-Statement

as a celia fan i am eating well this week jeez

celia my dear what do you mean by that "not exactly the same though, it is?" girlie what have you done what are you hidinggg

alice!

who was playing the music in the background there?

as someones whos computing department in school consists of keyboard with never-before-discovered types of bacteria wedged between the keys thats valid

alice dyer i love you so much

ah the dyhard is dyharding

ah yes the mutual "i'm traumatised and i know you are too but i don't like you enough to give details on mine or ask about yours so we'll just sit and suffer in silence til the ice somehow breaks" dynamic

also colin mention woohoo i love the scottish man

the computer start up noise and power down noise at the beginning and end of every episode kind of makes me think that someone is watching all of this (maybe us, or more likely someone in-universe)

anyway that was fun, i'm doing this late but this was a nice way to spend my first proper off-day since finishing all my exams

[theskeletonprior]

The Second: Slow 'n' Steady???

This is a casual little writing challenge to get myself into a habit, perhaps, or if not, to get some words from the meat of my brain to the pulp of the page. All of my stories for this challenge are set in the world of RAVENOT, and if you're curious, you can take a look at my WIP intro right here. And if you're really keen, you can read the first chapter (sort of a pilot as I toil) right here! Now onto the daily ramble.

It's been a slow start to the day today, but yesterday was pretty successful. I find that it's often the case that the first few days of any challenge are fruitful, but the real test comes midway through. For me, there will be some difficulty, this week, as Friday-Sunday are my working hours (what a trial, I know!). There won't be much time to write, then, so I'm not sure that my 5k for the week will come through like I hope. But it's only Wednesday, so we'll see. Yesterday I clocked a cool 980 words, and didn't attempt to flog out any more, which feels like good progress to me. Something that I often do, which helps, is that at the end of each night of the challenge, I'll try to write the next part, wherever I left off, by hand, before I go to bed that night. Then not only does my subconscious eat away at it through the night, but also I find I'm able to make adjustments and notice new storytelling pathways as I transcribe it onto my device of choosing. This month, I'm trying out Ellipsus, which I was about to say good things about, and likely still will, though I did run into a slight hitch while changing devices. (Changing devices, you see, is a key part of my writing strategy. I write on my laptop, on my desktop with the mechanical keyboard, and by hand.) But it's a minor gripe--it took a little longer than I expected to get the passcode to login. Other than that little hiccup, though, it's been working well. The interface is sleek, but intuitive, you can export your work to a pdf if you like. I thought sharing was a little bit cumbersome, as you have to create a new draft for others to be able to leave comments, but it still beats the pants off Google Docs, so far. I especially like the focus mode, which gets rid of pesky eye-catches that might interrupt your flow. Also, no one is making me say nice things about Ellipsus, I just thought I'd give them a go after they were so adamantly opposed to the use of generative AI. All told, second day's looking just dandy, despite how slow I've been to sit and write. Please behold an excerpt from yesterday.

"Stop!" Hadan shouted out, finding his voice small, thin as a child's in the dark. "Be not afraid," the Risen's answer was shatteringly strident and clarion-clear. They raised their hands, mailed in black, and the movement was enough for Hadan. He flinched, and let his arrow fly. The Risen didn't move, as if it knew before the arrow was loosed that it would fall short of the mark. Hadan fumbled for his quiver, unable to take his eyes off the still form of the intruder, who had yet to lower their hands. They were dressed in black from top to toe, as if they'd been cut loose from the shadows to walk free amongst the living. It was difficult to make out their face in the darkness of their hood, but Hadan did not miss the sight of a longsword at their waist, restful in its sheath. "Not another step!" "I have ta'en none." Hadan nocked an arrow. "I won't miss this time, wise arse," he warned, picking a mark in the centre of that black hood. "Pick another place!" "I cannot," the Risen said, "for I am Ravenot." If Hadan's blood had been running cold before, he felt it now as though the ice in his veins was splintering. He couldn't see well enough in the dark to look for the recognizable signs. Even his little town had heard the name Ravenot, and knew that the dead thing that bore it wore a tabard with a balanced scales, struck through from shoulder to hip. That it carried with it a blade and bell and trumpet, and that it went where the living could never dare, and did what even the risen dead could not. He couldn't bring himself to relax, for he knew that the Risen could lie just as well as the living could. What if this was some kind of trick, so that he'd let it in, and once he did, it would mean nothing but peril for the souls of all who dwelled here?

Until next time! Taglist: @rosieartsie @void-botanist @carmillasboywife

As always, let me know if you'd like to join or leave the taglist, and I'll act accordingly.

[lunarle-old]

Ok, quick question, do you have an idea for how long you want Love Letter to be? Because I genuinely need a vague idea of how long it's going to be until the comfort because IM DYING. I NEED A RESOLUTION, PLEASE. YOU DONT EVEN HAVE TO TELL ME WHAT YOU'VE PLANNED OR ANYTHING, JUST AN APPROXIMATE ESTIMATE FOR HOW MANY CHAPTERS THE FIC WILL BE. I don't usually read stuff this gruesome, so I'm like suffering right now because of my own dumbassness because I need a happy ending. I'm slowly dying from the suspense. I eat your content up every time, and like out of the maybe 4 or 5 fics you recently have made on the saiouma tag, I've only recently realized you wrote them all. YOU WERE LITERALLY THE SAME PERSON AND I WAS JUST SHOCKED. (How are they pumping these out left and right?? What type of stuff do they think about to come up with this stuff? How do they stay so serious when writing?)<- genuine thoughts I had a few weeks ago. ANYWAYS, keep up the good work. I'll be waiting in dread until the comfort comes, but I'll still be eating the love letter chapters whenever they come out no matter what. Also, please shuichi do not cannibalize yourself. Please. Do not. That last paragraph in chapter 9 has e so worried.

Hi sorry! I would have answered this much sooner, but I got stuck in an Uno game that lasted for over an hour. BUT I'm finally free (⁠ﾉ⁠◕⁠ヮ⁠◕⁠)⁠ﾉ⁠*⁠.⁠✧

I'm expecting Love Letter to be at least 20 chapters or so. There will be two more nighttime segment chapters (Shuichi's pov), and the rest will be the daytime segments with Kokichi and Maki. We're nearing the end of this arc, and after that, the recovery will start. I won't give away too much, but we're drawing ever closer! ^_^ As for an estimate until the recovery chapters... I'd say at least 7 or 8...? Maybe?? I don't have the last few days planned out chapter-wise, so we'll have to see for that one ;o; it's at least over 5

If you can't stomach the gruesome bits, I really don't recommend reading the fic (⁠｡⁠ŏ⁠﹏⁠ŏ⁠) at least not the nighttime segments. Don't force yourself to read anything that makes you uncomfortable or ill!!

I can answer those three questions!

I have a lot of free time @_@ . Whenever I'm bored, I start writing. I have sooo many ideas and I love to share them! Everyone has been so supportive, and it's given me the confidence to post more and more of my stuff :) I write a lot and I write fast lol

Ever since I was little, I enjoyed the darker parts of fiction. I enjoy whump especially :p so I'm always thinking about different whump tropes and applying them to my favs. I also take a lot of inspiration from music and games-- M5DP was born between my replaying Your Turn To Die and an event that happened in a roleplay between me and my gf. The base idea for Fever Frost was born from the third Wings of Fire book, and reinforced with Kitchen Fork by Jack Conte. Impermanent Attachment happened because I found it funny to give Shuichi a gun, but also mostly because I had a Komahina timeloop fic I wanted to write for ao3 and just never got the confidence to at the time. (If anyone wants me to go more in depth with how I put these fics together, just ask. I have lots of notes o_O) I'm ALWAYS thinking and having ideas ^_^ trust me i would have way more fics up if i came to ao3 with the confidence to post my mer / vampire / dragons fics

? Honestly I'm not sure what this means, sorry QwQ I've been writing since my hands could touch a keyboard. I submitted a Pokémon fanfic for one of my 1st grade creative writing assignments. I take every story as seriously as the writer wants me to, and in the case of my own fics, there are some parts where the tone is serious and some parts where it's just like "wtf is going on". That "two late!" joke in Love Letter wasn't planned at ALL, it only happened because the idea made me giggle ;P

Anyhow, thank you!! Dread is a good emotion to have when it comes to Love Letter updates <3 /j I PROMISE the comfort will come. I cannot physically handle an unhappy ending,, or at the very least a hopeful one xD

As for Shuichi... well. I can't promise anything. O_o

[onewomancitadel]

A polemic

So NaNoWriMo (the event in November where you try to write 50,000 words in a month) has announced its position on the usage of machine generation, which is that to ban it would be ableist and classist.

The really interesting thing here to me, is that this is the thing that does your thinking for you and removes your actual participation in generating writing and generating ideas. It is not in my view an actual assistive device in the sense that it enables a disabled person to complete the same task with or near the ability as an abled person and in my view condescending to pretend that it is so.

There was a real worry about the keyboard (or indeed the typewriter) interfering with the creative process of meditating on each word you must write by hand. And then way back when, the idea of writing words down as opposed to oral performance had the same sort of fear shroud it (this is what makes Plato's dialogues so interesting from a perspective of form, because it is intended to mimic those conversational forms in writing. I'm not a classicist please be nice to me). Understandably the argument here is that the influence of technological evolution on the creative process - where the process is the craft - is something we can easily draw parallel from to argue machine generation is perfectly fine.

To circle back to the most recent change, the keyboard, for instance, lets me write basically as quickly as I can think. It is superior for creative writing because I can be fully immersed in my prose work to the point I forget everything else because I am so in tune with it. I forget to meet my human bodily needs - I forget to eat and drink, I lose all sense of time. Essays written on the computer are my preference by far. Meanwhile, I prefer taking notes by hand for uni lectures and classes: I remember things better that way; I can write very fast and take only what I know I need; I don't dither, and most importantly I don't divert my attention from a lecture or discussion to the pure focus of writing on a keyboard. I also keep a notebook for brainstorming, drafting, that sort of thing. My process here resists the idea that keyboard = new = good = supplanting all else, but keyboard also very good sometimes.

But a disabled person who cannot use a keyboard is not going to have an easy time as me - so what are the ways that enable them to transcribe their thoughts? Making it fit for an individual person's disability is going to be a case-by-case basis, but there are ways of tailoring keyboards to the specific limbs or fingers that a disabled person may be able to use, or to fit their comfort needs - it will cost more than a regular keyboard, but there are more programs to support accessibility for disabled people than there were before (sometimes also for trialling the use of these technologies, like with game controllers, I've seen a lot of those in recent times) - which in part is a complicated process because lots of people have different types of disabilities. Somebody who is blind will require very diffierent support from somebody who has sight.

Machine generation doesn't transcribe your thoughts. Machine generation does the thinking and execution. It doesn't matter how you change it or edit it, you have to be totally honest about what you're doing: you're outsourcing your thinking. It is condescending to say that disabled people do not deserve to think. This includes people who struggle with thinking, or struggle with focus, or struggle with mental illness which stymies that actual motivation to write. Thinking, dreaming, and writing are themselves sources of and motivation for existence, and to outsource that, to me, is grossly offensive. (I am not going to introduce my personal background in here, but if you try to dispute that MG should help mentally ill people to write... if there is one thing which alleviates my existence in any way, it's writing).

The stylus on clay tablet, the pen, the typewriter, the keyboard, never did your thinking for you.

The classist dispute is interesting.

I see. (I checked Big W and JB Hi-Fi. Big W has the better deals I think with mouse included. Also, my most beloved keyboard I used to write for several years was $12 originally but my brother got it for free where he worked. Don't knock a cheap keyboard 'til you try it. You don't need a fancy gaming keyboard).

Most people probably have smart phones they can write on (the cheapest you can find are around ~$200AUD), but you generally want to be writing on a computer. Laptops aren't good investments in the long run and are fairly expensive, so let's say you want a desktop PC, in which case I would say get a refurbished computer like me. For the screen, the computer itself, and all the cables needed, I paid $200 including shipping, and it came with a free keyboard and mouse as well as year's warranty. Of course you might have the issue of a desk and chair as well, in which case I suggest op-shops, but if you are Australian don't write off the non-Ikeas; sometimes local furniture shops having sales are actually cheaper.

But if you are really working within limited means with absolutely nothing spare, there are library computers you may be able to access off the top of my head, and if you are a uni student, there are going to be computers available there. If the angle we're arguing is that it's limiting to people living in poverty to bar their use of machine generation, you're basically saying that if you're poor enough, then you shouldn't be allowed to dream and write yourself. Nuh uh.

This is actually so fucking obtuse lol.

In the case of a writing marathon, there is nothing weird about using the library or school or whatever to do your writing. 50,000 words spread across a month means you want to hit a little over 10,000 words a week, so let's say you ideally want 2,000 words a day, and if you're anxious about using a public space that much, let's say you want to go there five days a week so you need probably more in the realm of 3-5,000. But I think it would be fully doable if it's the event you've signed up to, and maybe you'd end up focussing better in a study-oriented space like that...

Critically the argument is founded on the idea that machine generation constitutes assistance and does not constitute the outsourcing of your own thinking. The argument normally launched against machine generation is from the repurposing of original creative material; the usage of machine generation is posited as 'sticking it to the man' punkish rebellion against copyright infringement, e.g.

this refrain was actually was the impetus for writing this post altogether, because it is so disingenuous as well as cruel and embarrassing, but I thought it was really interesting as well. Obviously that's not the angle I've taken throughout this post because I think that there is a weakness to this argument for a reason: yes, machine generation doesn't 'genuinely' remix material in the way the human alchemist imagination does, but the black box processes are kind of an ambiguous grey area. The real heart of this here is the allegation that legal enforcement of something is fundamentally heartless, not that laws and regulations in society are meant to actually service that society. It's concerning when they don't.

So it's really an anarchist sort of punk view versus my own which is that the hope would be that copyright laws protect artists (in the case of Disney it's clearly not so; that is neither here nor there), but that's really why I'm not arguing against that idea. I'm arguing against the idea that machine generation constitutes an assistive device, which it doesn't, because it supplants the person involved. Even if the way you feed an idea to machine generation is the way you've thought of it, its generated text is not yours; the machine generated it, irrespective of how that machine is trained off other texts. Even if you use it to merely brainstorm - and let's be real, that's not what's being argued here - it's offering ideas back at you the way a keyboard wouldn't.

Yes, I hate autofill text too. It should be turned off in word processing documents because it's disruptive.

The insistence is that machine generation is trained off other texts, and when you generate using those texts, you now have text that is some other author's work (because the machine generation is not thinking-feeling). The refutation to this from the pro-MG side is that this is what all authors naturally do, and then the refutation here follows that MG does not naturally transform a text the way a human would, always adding their own spin, always iterating. The pro-MG side then disputes that this difference is minimal and by the time a human involved edits the text - which is necessary at this point - it becomes something else. (That few people seemingly edit the text is beside the point).

I am rejecting this entire argument. I am also rejecting the idea that disabled people and poorer people should have to sit out NaNoWriMo because it may not be within their means, and I'm not going to dispute that at all; actually they should get to do whatever writing challenges they want, within whatever means that they require or desire, the same as any other person. That they meet those goals with different means because they can't do everything the same as an abled person is not in question.

Let's say an abled person chooses to attempt NaNoWriMo writing by hand. It's not roleplaying at making life difficult; let's say the individual has real difficulty with keyboards - or they can't afford a computer! I can handwrite several thousand words in a day and it would be fully possible, though with a lot of handcramping; it would require lots of pausing and stretching. I would get sick of it by Day 2. But it would be no less a legitimate attempt compared to other abled people who choose to attempt the marathon with a keyboard, or vice versa.

But I really wanted to square out my problems with people who launch criticism against MG and people who launch defenses at MG, because it goes around and around in circles. My issue with it is not necessarily an issue of copyright, though no doubt from a legalistic perspective that is in which the defense will be made; my view is one grounded in what the actual activity of writing is, and who deserves to have access to that (everybody) and where MG supplants that (fundamentally). Where writing begins is in your head. It is dreaming, brainstorming, thinking, and then executing that in constructed prose. When you don't do that, you're not writing at all.

[exoticalmonde]

Eve has a new obsession and I cannot express enough how much I just LOVE Lukai Hwei from League of legends.

Hwei is the cutest little creature ever and I accept NO criticism. I claim him body and soul and he wouldn't even know it until it's too late and he's in my mouth.

I will personally sail into Ionia from my Witch's hut in the Noxian outskirts and find him just so I can adopt him into my household like one of those pet artists people kept back in the day, except I will swing by thrice a week in a pattern of Tue/Thur/Sat to bring him food, cook for him, do the washing and cleaning (not like we don't have maids for that) and we talk. Just in case he does feel lonely because living alone is comforting until the loneliness and feeling of loss and confusion take you apart and you realize way too late you need someone at the peak of not having anybody.

Anyways

"Hwei, honeycake, did you finish the commission of two men eating their faces off in the moonlight waist deep in a lake? My friend is an artist and she already drew her own scrimblos having a fight and reconciling and honestly I want to stick it to her because I'm writing this story about a Lunari and a vastayan arena boss enemies to lovers--AnYwHo."

And timidly, though at first, he responds "No, madam, I haven't yet. Inspiration is lacking this week and I feel inclined to work on other things. But you want to know what I did do?"

My enthusiasm will peak and I will heimerdiner's dog him into knowing the small grace of a smile on my face is all for him, all because I like him, because he is sweet and adorable and worthy of my praise and what he creates will please me to no end. So he will take me out in the garden or the forest and he will go ham showing me what he painted over and now the back yard is glowing and the willows are singing and I can hear both pain and happiness front back and center envelopping the world until his art is in my viens and I will go "Good boy" because that's my SEROTONIN shot for today.

Then Ill let him trauma dump and talk about all he wants he is THAT important to me. The stupid weirdo writer picked up the soggy depressed artist, golly what a curious circumstance.

"Thank you for your hard work, Madam." he'd see me off and I'll be on my tippy toes patting his head and brushing paint off his nose bidding him goodbye when the night is already deep and starry and I will return to my house content my money is put to good use.

Anyways, fantasies aside... I need to read his lore. I need to know him, I need to know more of ionia now, and I desperately love his voice

Fantastic work for the VA and the creative team. Wish my luck as I break my fingers into the keyboard trying to do combos.

[2af-afterdark]

Giggling, kicking my feet, twirling my hair, I'm so glad you like my thots :3 Bael is the first character to get me this down bad and I need to do something with the brainrot, so you can 100% expect more in the future teehee

Also, this has been plaguing my thoughts for a while and. Are we going to talk about the very noticeable yandere and/or cannibal vibes Beel gives off? Like, it's not even just vibes at this point, tbh. There's that one sprite with his crazy smile, one of Bael's first chats says that Beel is "the type to fully immerse himself in whatever he likes" and then talks about having MC around so I'm pretty sure it also applies to his romantic interests, one of his homescreen lines goes something like "I keep thinking only about you whatever I do" and I'm pretty sure he was the roughest with Minhyeok during the first event (I expected it to be Levi, but he pretty much just scowled, meanwhile Beel grabbed him by the throat and honestly seemed like he was considering snapping Minhyeok's neck for getting his scent all over MC). I'd say there's a good chance he'll turn out to be at the very least pretty possessive and/or obsessive, if not downright yandere.

And the cannibalism is like. Literally just there. He ate the fifth seraph, and while technically cannibalism is eating your own species, I'd say angels and devils (and humans) are similar enough for it to count. Then there's the fact that during the current event he just casually fucking brought a bloody bag "big enough to store a demon" and asked to cook the contents (and people were only debating whether it was an angel or a demon corpse or maybe human hearts). I also can't remember the specific examples, but I recall that there were a few chats where I felt like he wants to eat MC's ass and not in a kinky way. Bro's the type to say "I could just gobble you up" and do.

Anyways, I'm starting to realise I cannot be trusted with a keyboard, I keep sending you these long-ass wall of text asks, I'm sorry 😭

— 💛

I understand you. I am also ace as fuck, but fictional men in need of a hug and a vacation are, like, the biggest fucking turn on. I feel that real deep emotion that makes my head dumb. lol

And, yes. I did notice. That's why I wrote Indulgences, actually. Bell is very cannibalistic and eats so many things that strike terror into the hearts of man. Ate an angel, ate some meat of unknown origin, implies often that he should totally be devouring MC. Like, eating and sexual metaphors have been interchanged for a long time, but with him... Sometimes it doesn't feel like a metaphor...

I know he has more lines about "eating" MC, but this is the one where I did a doubletake and actually wondered in what way he meant he'd eat them.

Interestingly enough, I get the cannibalism vibes, but I do not fully get the yandere vibes. In fact, I'd say he gives some of the least yandere vibes... in a sense. Bell is actually rather chill about MC seemingly spending time with others and has virtually no possessive tendencies when compared to devils like Leviathan or Bael. In fact, out of the interactions I've unlocked with him, he seems to almost never bring up lines that can be interpreted as keeping MC to himself.

That's why the moment with Minhyeok stood out so much. It was a moment where Bell actually showed a real possessive moment over MC. Although, it is unclear if he was being possessive or protective. I mean... this stranger walks through your electrified fence to get into your home and they smell like your squishy human? God damn right he's about to freak the fuck out until he has an explanation. Bell is actually very protective overall.

((I don't have screenshots since I didn't take them at the time AAAAAAA))

[traewilson]

So I saw this post on Twitter, and something about it stirred a bit of writing out of me. This became Too Much for Twitter to handle (like Hell I'm paying that bitch ass snake oil salesman running the place just to do what I can do for free here!)

So, for exactly no one's pleasure - my first actual post, and my first somewhat serious stab at writing. In that, I actually finished it. I digress. All I ask is that you put yourself in the world. This is a History Keeper, telling you some small trivial bit of Wasteland history.

"The Engagement Farmer. Once, I spoke with a man who said he knew him from before The Collapse. A friend of the family, he was. Before The Collapse, he was nobody. Never could hold down a job, never amounted to much of anything. He was obsessed with that unimaginable thing, the Internet - something I cannot describe to you who never knew of it, and still tell this story. Suffice it to say, like so many of us, when The Collapse came, he was so attached to the things that came before, the things now no longer. And once they were gone, this man collapsed.

Many can regale you with a story about encountering the Engagement Farmer. Most just talk about how they drove by, and suddenly a man, dressed in rags, face barely visible under the unwashed untrimmed hair. Worn over his head was a device he once made his whole world - a "computer monitor". Perhaps your parents will remember what function they once had. Your grandparents, if you're lucky.

...Where was I? Yes yes of course! Attached to his arms were devices called "keyboards" and long dead remains of a kind of phone from before The Collapse. Where he found them, no one could guess. He would chase these passers by, screaming with an animalistic ferocity, "ENGAGE WITH ME!! ENGAGE WITH ME!!" Most who saw him will tell of how they were both unsettled yet amused by him, and would marvel at how he just kept following them. Some told me of how they would actually slow down occasionally to see just how far he would go. One I remember was tickled pink by it, delighting in teasing the man before making him, as they say, eat dust.

One story in particular strikes me as particularly memorable. Once a man and his wife were traveling through the Wasteland, also on foot. It was dark of night, and as you should well know, barely a sound was made. They knew this was where the Engagement Farmer had camped, and didn't much care to find out what happened to those he noticed and caught up with. But as they snuck through the sands, an odd sound filled the air. Moaning? No, it was...weeping. A dangerous thing to do in the Wasteland - moisture is precious, you know. But I digress! This couple heard this weeping, and feared the worst. "So this is what happens to those the Farmer catches," one thought at the time. "What a cruel way to engage." These two worked up the courage to approach this sound, to see if they should help this poor soul. They crawled their way up a dune, and peered over. There, they saw the truth, and the truth was terrible - but not in the way you might think.

A tent was planted in the sands. Some kind of light filled the camp. The light they described didn't look like a campfires' light; it was too consistent, not to mention the lack of smoke. But that wasn't as important as the shadows they saw, reflected onto the tent. There, they saw the outline of what must've been the Engagement Farmer, and he was the one who was weeping. The weeping had become hysterical sobbing and shouting by the time they saw him. They noticed he was holding...something. They couldn't make out exactly what; the shadow looked peculiar. They decided, without a word said between them, to leave him to his troubles, sneaking around him. If he noticed them, he did not pursue.

Is the Engagement Farmer still out there? Just hang on, all in good time, all in good time! Don't hasten the story to its end. We'll get there in due course.

That same couple came by later on, to see if they couldn't talk to him; convince him to come with them back to their community. This community. Yes, that's right - that couple lived here. But when they arrived to where they had last seen him, they saw a dreadful, but all too common sight.

The Warboys of the one called Immortan Joe had been through the area. The signs were unmistakable. And there, hung from a nearby tree - the tree this couple hanged onto in their minds as a landmark to find him - was the remains of what was once called the Engagement Farmer. He was more deathly pale than even a Warboy - they took everything from him. His blood, and his life. They approached him, slowly, carefully, fearing an ambush that never came. He was strung up by an oddly thin metal chain attached to a collar around his neck. On that collar were inscriptions, and they understood the word from their lessons here. In his pocket, was a photo. The one who became a mother told me later, that was the first time in some time that she had cried, and soon the one who would be a father cried too. In hindsight, they realized what they really saw inside that tent.

They buried him, not too far from where he was found. They saw something in him, and they understood. What terrible irony, to only be truly seen after death. Somewhere out in the Wasteland, you might find that grave, perhaps, and the collar he was hung from, and the photo from his pocket, buried with the Engagement Farmer.

...What's that? Oh, I suppose I didn't say what the word was, did I? And the photo. Yes. Well, the one who would be father, to this day, never told me or anyone else what was on the photo. But he did mention, once, after several drinks of alcohol, what the collar said. The one who would become a mother would, without fail; abandon any conversation that brought up the collar. But just once, she told me what the photo held. Both times, they came to me and told me in no uncertain terms that they lied to me. Their words were adamant, but there was something in their eyes that...gave me room to doubt.

What he told me was

"It was Heathcliff. Heathcliff. That's what the collar said. You happy now?"

And what she told me, seconds before getting up from the table and leaving as fast as she could without disturbing everyone in sight, was:

"Just a boy. A boy and his dog."

[oldguy56-world]

Ashes to Ashes

I'm back baby I'm back!!! After a week of torturing myself to nice weather and more food than a human should eat here I am back at the keyboard. While working hard lying on the beach I came up with a dozen great ideas for blogs. It would be great if I could remember any of them. Unfortunately I did not take my phone so I could make notes for myself as reminders. I suppose I could have taken the pen and pad out of the hotel room but that seemed like a lot of work for someone who was supposed to be relaxing. Coming home my brain was too foggy either from the altitude of the plane or the realization that fun time was over to come up with anything coherent. It hit me the first morning back when I jumped on the scale. (By the way I do not recommend doing this if you have any heart issues and have just returned from an all-you-can-eat resort). I always try to make my blogs relevant and losing weight, while a good thing, didn't fit into the general events happening in the world. Then it hit me. I saw the Pope was sick and remembered that Lent had begun while we were away. This would be a neat way to tie things together. (Full disclosure. Back in March 2019 I had a blog called Easter Parade that dealt with Lent. I promise you this is all new stuff.) Because of the whole scale thing I have given up fast food and and dessert type foods for the duration. Even though my wife does not need to she also has given up those pleasures for the duration. She could give up other things but I might mention further down why this does not always go well. So continue reading and you will find some basic rules of Lent that you need to observe.

Don't give up everything you like. Do this and you will be making a deal with the devil by week 2.

It is good to sync up with your spouse so that you are not torturing each other by eating things they can't have.

My wife gave up coffee once about 10 years ago. She likes her daily coffee. She needs her daily coffee. This was not a great idea. No one wants to watch a lovely quiet woman suddenly speaking in tongues. To make matters worse we visited one of our daughters in Ottawa. She only had a one bedroom apartment so we got a hotel room. Unknown to us at the time in the parking lot of the hotel was a Tim Horton's. Every morning when we opened the drapes she would gaze longingly at the line-ups at the drive through. By day three was when she started saying something that sounded like Latin but definitely was not. We left for home that day,

You have to balance things out. If something is going to make you cranky that is not good. The idea of fasting is to pave the way to Heaven. Getting cranky and shooting people paves the way to Hell. You need to remember why you are doing this.

It is easy to spot other Catholics for the first few days because the cross of ashes is still visible on their forehead. After that it is more difficult. Not that you shouldn't associate with other religions but Lent is a great time to suffer with others who are also suffering. Comparing how much you are giving up is a great pastime. You will often hear 'I did that one once". When you hear the word once it is a clear sign that you are in for more than you bargained, otherwise they would say 'Oh yeah, I do that at least every second year.' There are some great abstinences out there. How do you spot another Catholic? Say 'Dominus Vobiscum'. If they are Catholic they will automatically say 'Et Cum spiritu tuo.' This was drummed in to all of us at an early age and cannot be deprogrammed.

I am not certain about this rule but I believe it is possible to say 'during Lent I will not eat that except each Sunday.' I asked a priest once about that and the look on his face was unreadable. Not sure if he was praying for my soul or delighted that I found a loophole he could use. Unfortunately there is no one around that can verify if it works or not, Shame.

If you can't absolutely give up some food, booze or cigarettes maybe you can give up some time. You can always volunteer your time at a bar, fast food place, or liquor store and help other people find their way to the hot place. My theory is that if enough others go there more space will be available in the good place and perhaps some minor moral slips from your past will be overlooked. It is a numbers game.

There are no Mulligans. You can't say 'today is okay to cheat.'' Do I know this for certain? No, but do you really want to take that chance. We know that Hell will soon be full of liars, but do we want to equal that number with cheaters?

THOUGHT OF THE WEEK: Making a sacrifice means making a sacrifice. You can't cut corners.

[zwampy]

I don't think I'm gonna have a working machine for like... oh my god I don't know I can't see where in the future I can afford it. I have a non negotiable overseas trip coming up so £££ then I want to make use of my updated passport & visa & try going to the west coast too while I have the freedom and see friends

I can't see any available "BIG purchase" money coming up like... this year...... :-(

I'm like. Really frozen here it sucks. It could be worse but Christ okay my laptop didn't even fucking break you know what happened?

I went to replace the long nonworking battery (now puffy lol) and there's one screw attaching it to the motherboard that WILL. NOT. REMOVE. I've had multiple techy people try. I've done all the (safe to do) tricks. Asides from ripping the actual battery apart or shattering the motherboard there is nothing I can do. I'm still in disbelief! It technically works! But there's ONE. SCREW. NO ONE CAN SAFELY REMOVE WITHOUT EXPLODING THE BATTERY AAAAAAAAA

I already spent £50 buying the new battery I cannot even fucking use! I bought new ram! I'm so defeated. It's already been months and months but it sucks so fucking bad people apparently edit on their phones? What? Adobe would freeze a second every time I did a process on my 2018 but still pretty good laptop. I am not making videos on my phone I don't know how people do it. I'm not paying for clip studio mobile either. I mean I used my computer for other stuff but I'm like creatively hurting.

And I just love that laptop! It's a gamer laptop but such a nice modest design, I love the keyboard, I love the location of the ports, and I'm attached to it, it's powered through everything for so many years and the only reason its had to stop is because I discovered the battery was unsafe and I cannot remove it. I'm not gonna put it all back together, fat battery in place, and try to ignore it...

I don't knowww... I've looked at plenty of second hand machines but it's obviously still gonna be like £500 for a machine with an okay graphics card. We have a really good second hand electronics store here called CEX and I've used them for like all (?) my electronics but I'm still outta luck here.

An alternative would be trying to fumble together a bare bones but good for medium/heavy lifting desktop and see how cheap I can get it. Main issue is a desktop doesn't suit me cause I move around so much, but at this point, I've been without a machine so long like, at least having one in one place would be better than what I have right now.

Finished mourning my situation. I wish I had moneyyyy :'''''^) I get so jealous when acquaintances mention stuff that makes me double take. I never used to be like this but god I'm going through such bad financial envy.

But people will say the same of me when I have to fly to the states in 2 months, like it looks like I have financial freedom. And in choosing to try to return later in the year because return flights can be as low as £450 to California, and I think seeing my friends and making memories is more important than my laptop or iPod... Especially while i have the freedom to do so because that's not always gonna be something I can do!

And in going to Dublin for a weekend soon and now it feels so like. Actually you shouldn't go anywhere. Save money always just don't do anything, just don't live, just let these few years pass you by with no novel experiences like DAMN. I HAVE TO LIVE! BUT IT'S SO HARD.

My financial situation is strange compared to other peoples but so is my life and gghuyhg I always feel judged and misunderstood

Snywayyyy ... Wow is me etc. I have almost no issue buying a £4 coffee when I'm out for a day with a friend and I refuse to budge on that but it's £80+ to renew your passport and that made me so upset I couldn't eat

OH THE THINGS I WOULD SHARE HERE IF I COULD MAN I NEED TO SUBMIT MY ANONYMOUS STORY TO SOMEONE

I going to eat dinner now 👍

[batz-surveys]

14.

1. Do you think it’s cute when you’re going down the road and see a dog with its head hanging out the window? Yes, of course. I will always be excited to see a dog riding in a car, because it's adorable. But also, because I know how excited my dog gets when we take her for a ride.

2. Do you know what a capo is? I didn't, but I looked it up, and now I do. To save those reading the time, here's the definition: a device that is attached to the frets of a string instrument to raise the pitch of each string.

3. When was the last time you wrote down a schedule? I haven't had to do this for a very long time. My schedule for work is always the same, and since I'm a routine kind of person, my at home schedule is just burned into my brain anyway. I do have to write down To Do Lists though.

4. What does your favorite hair tie/accessory look like? I love my black velvet scrunchies. They make me feel a little luxurious for some reason.

5. When was the last time you used a touch screen monitor? At work on Wednesday - the laptops we use to do lesson plans for the kids are touch screen.

6. Do you have a favorite kind of milk? 2%, whole, etc? I've used almond or soy milk for almost the entirety of my life at this point. I cannot stand the smell of cow's milk. I'll eat things made of cow's milk, like cheese or ice cream, but I will practically gag at a glass of plain cow's milk.

7. Have you ever tried Parmalat milk? Nah, I've seen it in stores though.

8. Are there any buttons on your keyboard that you don’t know what they’re for/never used? Haha, yeah. The laptop I'm using is still relatively new to me, even though I bought it back in June. It's a gaming laptop, and I've never owned one before.

9. Have you ever had to take prenatal vitamins? I didn't HAVE to, but I wanted to take them to see if they would help my hair grow. They did, but I stopped because I really believe they were making my periods incredibly heavy. A month or two after I stopped taking them, my periods became normal again (well, what I'm used to anyway).

10. Do you have anything unusual tacked onto your walls? Haha, yes. Our gallery wall is all art that both my husband and I painted, as well as some features from our moms. The art is weird and not traditional at all. I also have a giant neon colored bat sign from Target's Halloween collection this year, and I won't be taking it down just because Halloween is over. Like, I love it so much, I would actually get a version of it tattooed on me because I love the colors and I love bats.

11. Do you have a favorite drummer? My husband! But besides him, definitely Aron Mellergård and Branden Steineckert.

12. Do you like to earn your own money or do you prefer that your parents/family buy you things? I do like to earn my own money, but I won't lie and say being spoiled by my husband sometimes isn't fun for me, haha.

13. Have you ever heard of the man with rubber skin? No, that sounds kind of scary.

14. Does anyone in your family play in a band? What band? No, not anymore. My husband was the frontman for a local metal/prog-rock band a long while ago.

15. Why do you think a lot of girls claim to hate the color pink? Literally every woman I know loves pink, except me. I don't hate it, but with the exception of the Kirby merchandise I own, I don't have many pink things because it's just not a color I gravitate towards.

16. Are there any symbols that have personal meaning to you? i.e: dice, a necklace, etc. What are they? The first gift my husband ever gave me. It was this cheap, little red gem shaped like a heart, on a chain that's tarnished now. He gave it to me on our first real date (we knew each other a while before as we were friends first) since it was Valentine's Day and he didn't want to show up empty handed (not that I would've cared). I still have it in my jewelry box after all this time and I'll never get rid of it.

17. What’s the biggest spider you’ve come across? Omg. I don't know what kind of spider it was, but it was the hugest spider I've ever seen in my life. I'm pretty sure it was a wolf spider now, because I googled if those spiders live in the state I live, and they do. I remember the night I saw it in full. I say "full" because we had this small, medium-ish sized hole in the wall of our laundry room, and sometimes I would see legs sticking out of it, and this had to be that spider. I was like fifteen or sixteen, and I used to roleplay online (the dorky kind), and I just happened to look up and it was in the corner of the dining room (where our family computer was). I literally stayed up all night, just to watch it and make sure it wasn't going to end up in my bedroom. Like every time I posted a paragraph, I'd look to make sure it was still there. I waited until my dad's alarm went off at 5am, and when he came out his room, I said, "DAD. There's a huge spider, please, please get rid of it." And like it was nothing at all, my dad got the broom, put it up to the spider and somehow got the spider on the broom, and then he threw it outside over the balcony (we were in an upstairs apartment). I swear the thing was the size of my hand.

18. Have you ever been bitten by anything poisonous? No, thank goodness... *knocks on wood*

19. What brand is your remote? RCA - etc. I think it's just a generic one modeled after the one that goes to our LG tv. The other is the Fire TV stick remote.

20. Do you know anyone who has been knighted? No.

21. Have you ever heard of the band Goatwhore? Haha, no, but now I have to check it out because with a name like that, it's gotta be metal. -forty seconds later- Yep, I was right. I gotta show my husband this band after he's done getting dressed, I'm sure he'll like 'em. Update: He knew about them already, because of course he did.

22. Have you ever met someone who thinks they are a rockstar because they can play Guitar Hero? Haha! Yes. I had a friend Alex a long time ago, and when we would all get together and play it, he would take it so seriously. I remember my old best friend James played that one Dragonforce song basically perfect, and Alex got so pissed that James did better than him because he had been practicing it so long - way longer than James had.

23. Which Mario game would you say is your favorite? That is, if you even like Mario? Definitely Mario Kart. But as far as the screen scroller Marios, I would say Super Mario World for Super Nintendo. The game is just so pleasing to the eye to look at, plus you get Yoshi!

23. Do you have one of those creepy family members that no one really talks to? Nah, not really. If anything, that's probably me because I'm pretty anti-social at big family gatherings.

24. Do you have a DeviantART account? No.

25. How many quarters would you say you had on you right now? None, I don't own any change.

26. Have you ever seen any Bruce Lee movies? Yes! Haha, I remember watching some of Fist of Fury at a fucking Halloween party one year when I was younger. I thought it was so strange that that's the movie that was on the television, and not a horror film.

27. Ever started watching a movie, then forget why you watched it in the first place? I honestly will watch movies based on the summary, but I will also stop watching the movie if I think it's terrible. Like recently, I watched this movie on Netflix called Tarot...and I only had 30 minutes to go, but I had to shut it off because it was so bad and I was losing interest.

28. When was the last time you used a hot glue gun? I've never used a hot glue gun.

29. Do you have a junk drawer? Of course, doesn't everybody?

30. Have you ever gotten wasted off cough/cold medicine? No.

31. Did you know that if your baby’s gums are hurting you can rub whiskey into them to numb them? I've heard that before, but I don't think I would every recommend giving a baby alcohol.

32. What’s your opinion on thoroughbred racing? The thought of all that the horses probably go through just to be "the best" really breaks my heart. And the fact that if they're no longer able to race, or they break something, that they're more than likely going to get put down is even sadder.

33. Ever watched Jerry Springer just to remind yourself that your life isn’t as messed up as theirs? Hahaha, jeez, not for that reason. I used to think it was just entertaining to see, and question how people could act like that in front of millions of viewers and a live audience.

34. Have you ever had acne? If not, you’re so lucky. Had? Listen, I'm a 36-year-old woman and I still get acne if I eat too much sugar or it's the week before my period. They didn't tell us anything about that in sex ed. I figured when my acne cleared up as a teenager, that was it. Nope, I got surprised when I turned 27 and got adult acne and although my face is usually clear, too much junk food and my hormones will definitely humble me month to month.

35. Have you ever been spelunking? No, and as cool as it sounds, I'll probably never do it.

36. Ever walked into a facility of the opposite gender - like restrooms? Yeah, I've used the men's room several times at concerts or even busy restaurants. Sometimes you just can't wait, and I'll be damned if I'm going to wet myself because of the body parts I have.

37. Ever lost your car in the parking lot? If so, did you use your car alarm to find it again? I don't have my own car, but I'm sure my husband has done something to this effect after leaving a concert or something while I was with him.

38. If you’ve ever ridden a roller coaster, which one was your favorite? I have before, I can't remember the name of it. It was at Carowinds though.

39. Has there ever been a Christmas where you had to do without gifts-wise? I don't think so. My parents always made it work, even though that's not the kind of kids my brother and I were. We didn't care about Xmas too much, because we honestly got things throughout the year based on our behavior and our grades. But one that sticks out is the Xmas of 2006. We had recently moved into my parents' current house after they bought it, so money was really tight. It was just me living there with my parents at the time, and my dad bought me two CDs after asking around what someone who likes my kind of music would like in the music section of Walmart. I nearly cried, because it was really just the thought that was so sweet - and he actually did a great job because it was Incubus' Light Grenades and Hawthorne Height's If Only You Were Lonely. Both bands I liked, and I remember opening them and my dad seemed sad that that's all he got for me, but I was so appreciative.

40. Do you type with capital letters and proper punctuation? I try.

41. What’s so cool about Sweden? It produced Dirty Loops, so I mean, it's gotta be a cool place.

42. What’s your favorite piece of your silverware and why? I don't really have one? What an odd question.

43. If you’ve ever had a crush, what is the most embarrassing thing that has happened to you around him/her? Haha, I don't embarrass easily around my husband anymore, but in the beginning of our relationship when we started getting intimate, one time in the middle of it, I farted. That honestly wasn't even that embarrassing to me but trying to hold in my laugh was. And he didn't even say anything and just kept going, which made me want to laugh even more. So not long after, he finished, and I just busted out laughing because if I'm anything, I'm very immature about farts. We look back on it and laugh now, but man, he thought I was laughing at him.

44. Have you ever pet a tarantula? Actually, I have. I didn't have a phobia of spiders until I was in the eighth grade (so like 12, 13) when I was walking home from the bus stop with my dad, and I walked right into a banana spider's web. I mean, I had spider-on-face contact...and from that moment on, I was and continue to be scared of all spiders (except for the cute little jumping ones we sometimes get).

45. Have you ever been to the Olympic Games? No.

46. Have you conquered any fears recently? No.

47. If you’re in school, and have a bookbag, what does it look like? I’m not in school, but I use a bookbag for work. It's a Loungefly X-men (in chibi style) patterned one, with a light blue background. The kids at my work get a kick out of it, and I love X-men. I've been using this since I received it as a gift from my MIL for Xmas years ago.

48. Have you ever shopped for clothes at a thrift store? If not, why is that? I used to mostly buy my clothes at thrift stores as a teenager. We had a Goodwill basically across the street from our high school, and my friends and I almost always went there, and then to Subway for a $5, after school. From what I hear, now Goodwill prices are basically like new clothes prices. Now, my closet is full and sometimes I'll just shop secondhand online like from Poshmark or Mercari if there's something specific that I need, that I can't find in the stores.

49. Let’s say you win a trip to Australia (if you already live there, then you’ll go to Russia.), at any city of your choice. What would you like to see first and why? Probably Sydney, because it's the first one that popped into my head, and because they have the Sydney Opera House and I've always wanted to see that in person. The architecture on the outside is crazy, I can only imagine how it looks inside.

50. Have you ever written your own Bucket List? If you haven’t seen the movie, it’s a list of goals to accomplish before you die. Sort of. As a teenager, I used to write Summer Bucket Lists with friends, and we'd try to attempt to complete everything on it. The last year I did that was when I turned nineteen, I believe. Man, this survey had me reminiscing so many things!

[cryptidsurveys]

Saturday, October 12th, 2024.

What happened last night? Not much. It was a pretty typical night for me. I ate dinner, cleaned the litter boxes, chatted with my dad for a bit, then went upstairs to listen to part of a podcast before getting ready for bed.

Who is the last boy you hugged? My dad.

What was the last thing you thought? I was trying to think of the last guy I hugged who wasn't my dad and realized I have absolutely no idea.

What are you thinking about right now? How one of my kitties would rather walk across my desk/keyboard than curl up on my lap. I think she's finally settling down, though.

Would you have sex with the last person you sent a message to? No.

Would you consider yourself spoiled? I would consider myself very fortunate to have the life I do, but I wouldn't consider myself spoiled.

What was the last text you sent? It was a text to my dad to let him know I was on the way home from the animal shelter earlier.

Do you break things when you are mad? I have in the past. Definitely not my proudest moments.

Whose hoodie did you last wear besides your own? I don't think I've ever worn a hoodie that wasn't mine.

Did something happen today that made you angry? Ever so slightly frustrated, but nowhere near angry.

What did you do today? I woke up shortly before 5:00am, watched some Youtube, took a shower and got dressed around 5:30am, ate breakfast while reading Youtube comments, got my bag ready, and then I sat in the family room and talked with my dad until 7:00am. Drove to the animal shelter and was there from around 7:20am-11:30am. Drove home, took a shower, had lunch (with yet more Youtube comment reading), cleaned the upstairs bathroom, and then picked out this survey to take.

What did you do Friday night? Last night was Friday night, so I already mentioned it above.

Are you afraid of losing the last person you talked to? Terrified.

Are you lying to yourself about something? I'm feeling confused/conflicted about certain things, but I don't think I'm lying to myself. I'm just trying to take the necessary time to figure out how I really feel.

Is your bed comfortable? It seems that way, but I often wake up stiff and achy. Maybe I'm just getting older, maybe it's my sleeping positions, or maybe I need a better pillow.

Does it take a lot to make you happy? No. The littlest things can bring me a lot of joy. Cuddling with my cats. Feeling cozy and cute in my favorite outfits. Shopping for and eating holiday treats. Snowy, rainy, or cloudy weather. Picnicking at the Mountain Park. All the kitties at the animal shelter. A relaxing drive while listening to classical music. Autumn leaves. New podcasts from my faves. Memes and silly videos from my best friend. Spending time with my dad. Etc.

Your best friend says to you now, “let's go to a party and get trashed!”? I would assume it was a joke, like there was an incoming punchline, because that's not something either one of us are inclined to enjoy.

Who knows mainly all of your secrets? My dad, my therapist, Oliver, and one of my ex-partners.

Can you go a day without thinking about the person that’s on your mind now? There are a number of people "on my mind" thanks to this survey. It's not anyone specific. Some I can go a day without thinking about, and some I cannot.

What were you doing at 1 in the morning? I was sleeping.

If someone looked ON your bed, what would they find? Several pillows and blankets, a book, and two of my kitties.

Were you single over last summer? Yeah.

Has anyone ever told you, you have pretty eyes? Yeah.

Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight? No.

How many different people of the opposite sex have you cried over? I don't know. A few.

When you think of the rainbow, what pops in your head? The rainbow cat hide-away we have at the shelter. It disappeared for a while, but I found it again the other day…only for it to disappear again…

Is the person you last texted single? Yeah.

Was last night terrible? No. There was nothing terrible about it. It was just a normal, chill night.

[pyroselkie]

1 - one object u would take to a deserted island?

2 - notable book you've read this year (or in general!)

3 - what would be ur perfect sandwich... like a platonic ideal of a sandwich what bread which ingredients etc...

oooh im so anon you'll. never guess who i am

Oooooo you're soo anon I have absolutely no idea who you are hehe

I have so many options here and I'm so indecisive so here's some of my favourites:

A flintlock pistol and a cutlass (so that i can pretend to be a pirate who's been marooned)

My poseable Cure Passion figurine (for moral support)

Something to write fanfic on (preferably with a keyboard bc i canNOT write by hand it will kill me)

2. If we're going for this year then Anansi Boys!!!! I wasn't expecting it to have a romance plot but honestly I don't hate it, which is rare. I haven't finished it yet bc I keep forgetting rip. If we're going for in general then probably The Night Circus. I don't particularly care for the characters or their interpersonal dramas but the background lore of the circus itself lives in my brain and eats away at my thoughts nearly constantly. OH NOW I WANNA MAKE AN ENSTARS AU BASED OFF OF IT. It would be so easy to include every character and I love AUs where I can do that-

3. Oh boy ok. I've been thinking about this for the past 12 hours and I'm struggling. I don't really like typical sandwiches, but I do like things with bread on either side? Sandwiches are such a wide range of foods that I don't wanna just denounce them altogether because there's plenty of "sandwiches" that I love. WAIT HOLD ON I'VE JUST REMEMBERED. Every Christmas my family goes to my grandparents house and my gdad makes bacon butties (bacon sandwiches) with ketchup and they're nothing special but also they're everything to me. Actually now I'm remembering chip butties. Oh my god ok ok ok final answer, my perfect sandwich would be: white bread cob, big and round but a little bit flat, lightly buttered, with freshly-cooked chip-shop chips filling it up. Best eaten when it's late autumn/early winter when it's chilly and miserable and you feel a bit shit and all you want is to be sent to carbohydrate heaven.

[nicks-disks]

Crowley and velvet underground???

I'm losing my queer little mind over how it's cannon that Crowley's favourite song is literally I'll Be Your Mirror I am so unhealthily happy but oh my GOD y'all

if you've never listened to Pale Blue Eyes it is literally fucking HEARTWRENCHING i can't cope i'm honestly kind of shocked it's not on their cannon playlist because it just fits her side of the divorce SO WELL. like bfr I'm GNAWING on my bedframe. and you cannot convince me they hear it and absolutely break. down. every time.

also i know we got him talking about velvet underground in season one but it's just SUCH. a good band for him?? Like whatever music niche they've hit i can't even explain but it's literally PERFECT for her and I literally might even argue it's more perfect that Queen. Like, Crowley wouldn't be listening to deathcore or shoegraze or nu metal, grunge, punk etc even though those are quite stereotypically seen as like, demonic genres of music LMAO I can't quite see it. he would appreciate it, sure, but his fave type of music is whatever the fuck Velvet is doing Underground somewhere it just fits.

Tbh almost ALL of VU's discog fit Crowley in one way or another it's wild and I hope Good Omens singlehandedly make VU's streams go up after this like babe HAVE YOU LISTENED to After Hours?? Or the Black Angel's Death Song??? Or I Found a Reason???? Or ????? And don't even get me STARTED on how Waiting for My Man is so Aziraphale im consuming my keyboard

Even if you don't agree with how ineffable coded VU is then you have to admit they've just got good songs that touch on kickass topics, like Candy Says which was actually written about a trans girl Lou Reed knew and her struggle with gender. To say that's Crowley coded would be taking away from it I believe, but could you IMAGINE Crowley listening to it and always feeling bad at how humans were so confined physically?? Like he would be third person heartbroken for us AND Candy

I am literally THIS CLOSE 🤏 to making a tasty angsty scrumy lil animatic of Pale Blue Eyes because listen to the song, look me dead in the eyes and tell me I'm wrong, but the only thing stopping me is that there's enough of those tasty angsty scrumy lil animatics around rn 😭 we're eating a little TOO good

anyways im sorry for this post being literally aimless rambling but I absolutely ADORE VU and GO so this cooking my brains im going to combust