#i'm always going to make this a latine thing bc it is a latine thing

[pennyserenade]

God Sejanus is so damn special to me. He’s such a unique character and I love him with my whole heart. He carries this belief that he’s somehow abandoned his people, abandoned himself, when he’s doing all he can to put an end to the games but he’s just a teenage boy with the weight of the world on his shoulders and he still feels like he isn’t doing enough despite doing more than anyone ever has before him and all he wants is a better life not for himself but for everyone suffering and oppressed by the capital and he’s just so important to me, like such a pure good hearted person in a world full of hatred and violence and he still thinks he’s not doing enough when staying as kind as he is and keeping his connection to his home was an act of resistance in and of itself

I could talk about him for hours tbh

i'm very happy to be receiving this ask because he's truly been on my mind for WEEKS. i feel oddly protective of sejanus because i think a lot of people have come to view him as weak and annoying---which, i think, is mostly a reflection of the way coriolanus views him. i do think there are conversations to be had about the fact that the decisions sejanus made weren't always sound, but he was meant to serve a foil to coriolanus. every move coriolanus made was calculated, thought out to even the most minute detail at times, and sejanus' were quick, instinctual, done not to impress because they he they had to be done. when arcahne crane was murdered by her tribute, coriolanus hesitated, had to be told by lucy gray to help, and did so because of the cameras. sejanus knelt down and spread bread crumbs over her body, without a single thought about the cameras. he did not care that no one understood this gesture, or that arachne was someone who never treated him with an inkling of respect. coriolanus thought about that-- he thought how she was evil and deserved to get her throat slit, and he thought about how he wasn't her friend, not really, and he even thought it was ironic that he was painted that way later. sejanus was angry at these people but forgiving, good, and he spoke out vehemently against their games and as often as he did because he hoped against hope; he wanted to reach them because he felt that he could. in all of his anger, sejanus never robbed these people of their humanity the way that they did the district people, because he knew how erroneous it was. the fight would not be worth fighting if he felt, even for a second, that there was no one to listen.

i also love that his identity is shaky; that, even though he has fierce, unapologetic ties to district two, he knows that they don't view him as one of their own. this is one of the parts that i find myself relating to the most when it comes to sejanus. i think many first gen latines can and do feel the same way. it is an odd experienced to be othered by your own and simultaneously hated by what you're 'meant' to be. sejanus could not readily fit in to the capital no matter how hard he might've tried, and he couldn't fit in to the districts because he was too 'capital' in their mind, just for the mere fact that he'd been sent there and taught there. and you do feel endlessly guilt about it -- at least in my experience -- and it is hard to contend with. you can carry on their traditions and love what you are and defend it until you are blue in the face, but what happens when they are in the cage and you stand on the other side, privileged? and like -- this is a real life thing that happened! they put children in cages. i wish with EVERYTHING in me that people would start talking about the parallels between the events in the ballad of songbirds and snakes and trump presidency because that's what it's talking abt!!! it is no coincidence they casted who they casted

[thaern]

honestly so refreshing to see someone also interested in latin american history and politics in the conclave fandom!!!! i feel like people overlook how politically #awful mexico was during the 60s-90s, between the guerra sucia, the violence against student protesters, the government-led massacres, and the severe recession and poverty in the 90s. plus the presence of liberation theology and radical indigenous groups!!!!!! benítez was always going to be a radical and it's nice to know someone else sees that :]

Yes! I'm latina and I have been studying the history of LATAM in the context of philosophy and as you may well know, you can't talk about an specific thinking without the historical context behind.

I have invested specifically in migration mostly bc my country is a bridge between South and North America so I detailed mostly in the context of political, religion and social perspective AND YES everything connect to one point, as I tried to show how dirty are some positions (political I mean) obviously I have to go back to context of the civil war here in the 80s, the strike of students, workers and of course the killing of thinking (and of course lives) of our indigenous groups.

So yes, when I see Vincent, specific the movie Vincent being a Latino who grow in the context of a LATAM where there were more conflicts being social or politic is almost out of character not thinking he wouldn't make an opinion of it, special if he later gets to live in dangerous places whose actual state of living is directly caused by a political thing.

So when Tedesco makes his speech and Vincent talks I don't think he does simply for defending his faith but to tried to show that this meaningless fight the curia has in his hands is NOTHING, they have grow acoustom to their privilege that they don't see beyond Rome and blame something they didn't even tried to understand, is just too much.

I can tried to explain so much, how the theory of liberation can be explain in Vincent, how he won't feel completely in his new position thanks to his political and social views, how his history is easy ignore for those who don't entirely understand the reality of our history, etc, but yes

Is good to see that someone else see this and Vincent as a revolutionary between his position as member of the church allowed him

[mikimakiboo]

I was wondering if you were doing anything for/with the apple incident. Since it would be like, a clarifying moment for the guys in the tt gang. Like that’s why he’s jumpy and scared all the time. That’s why he was so rude and scared. That’s why he stopped talking to them, he thought they would be aggressive and violent. The servants could think he was cursed by the devil, or a witch or smth. Till it reached a high note, then him and Dream slowly reconciled and reconnect. Then night just starts pouring his soul out with him bc he’s so lonely and scared.

My time to shine and ramblllleeeeeee

Btw since you asked something about my AU just assume I'm in love with you, okay ? I'm your wife now /jk

As you can imagine the answer will contain spoilers regarding Nightmare's backstory SO I'm putting it under the cut :D

So regarding the apple incident, whenever I make AUs including Nightmare he is always corrupted, however the tree of feelings doesn't always fit the narrative, like in Time Travelers AU where Nightmare was born and lives as a noble in the 17th century and not 500 years ago as a guardian

So since there isn't any tree of feelings there isn't any apples either so there technically can't be an apple incident

So that's when the second scenario comes in handy: magic overdose :D

Basically at the age of six Nightmare's magic starts to grow a little too much, he would often choke on a black goop that would form in his soul and go in his throat for him to throw up, and it's a long and painful transformation, I'm talking about years here, from his six years old to his ten years old his magic would slowly overwhelm his soul more and more, come out of the joints, mouth, nose, eyesockets, he would choke and develop quite severe chronic pains until he's eventually covered in goop just like his original corrupted self

One good thing with that scenario is that it allows me to give him a softer personality as he wasn't exactly corrupted, his magic just got messed up, but he's still the same person as his passive self

Now, as Nightmare is living in a very religious time, everyone thought that his messed up magic and black goop was due to some demon possession or that he was cursed by either God, Satan, or any other divine force, and so Nightmare had to go through a lot of exorcisms, lots of different covens but of course none of it worked

He was always insulted and looked down upon as he was seen like a curse by himself: his father died young (when Dream and him were babies), his mother died young too (when they were young adult) and everyone blamed him and his mere existence for it and every other bad thing that happened to other people he ever talked to or looked their way

His own mother, Nim, was part of the people insulting him, by telling him that he was her biggest failure and she should have left him in a coven if only Dream didn't insist so much to keep him

So yeah Nightmare doesn't really think very high of himself and is fully focused on being as good as he can so hopefully people won't see him as a curse anymore

Dream was actually the only one to never turn his back on him, even when they were in different covens/schools (nobles were placed in special schools from 10yo to 18yo, very strict, they had to speak Latin too so that's why Nightmare is fluent) he would always send him letters, so their relationship never got too bad, Nightmare did have a period when he didn't respond to the letters but he never felt resentment or anything toward his twin because he was actually his only friend, so when they were back home together when they got out at 18 they actually became even closer because Dream was really the only one who would listen to him and genuinely love him

So yeah the two brothers are inseparable and rely very much on each other, Nightmare tells everything to Dream and Dream also talks about anything and everything with Nightmare

Now regarding the tt gang, when they learnt about the backstory they did assemble some pieces regarding Nightmare's behavior

Because his obsession with being perfect and not mixing with them, hardly talking to them and keeping his perfect noble image is actually trauma response after years of being talked down and seen as God's mistake, so now he has to appear perfect at all time so he won't have troubles anymore without realizing that this image hurts him too as he bottles up everything he feels and do not act like himself AT ALL

So yeah the backtory do make them understand his behavior better and they do feel very bad for him because obviously it wasn't his fault, he was only a child who should have gone to the doctor to have some magic drained out instead of being exorcized every two days and treated like shit

They'll eventually work through the trauma together

Hope that answers your question :D

[eatyourmaker]

How about some burningholysacrilege if you have time ^^

I am definitely not the person that came up with that ship trust /silly

I just had to do this one, but I didn't know how to tackle it, so I just drew a snippit of a long going rp I have going on.

I'm glad you started publicly shipping these 3, bc I've been privately shipping them for around the same time I've shipped FieryFaith, but I was too anxious to even draw them let alone share any art 👉🏾👈🏾

While I'm here lemme share some hcs I've accumulated throughout the duration of these 3 living in my head rent-free

Hcs under the cut

(TWO OF THE HCS ARE SUGGESTIVE, I will mark them so you can skip them)

1. Ignacio and Skiddad were a thing before Ignacio got together with Gregor. They were always an open relationship though, so both parties were free to explore and experiment with others. At the end of the day though they'd do their own independent things, they knew they would always be together. They belong together. They're soulmates. Bonded for eternity, and it didn't matter what would happen, they would always find their way back eachother.

2. The aforementioned point is why Gregor entering the picture was really confusing for Ignacio at first. Skiddad is the one. So how could there ever be another? In my hc Skiddad died for a brief period of time and then was resurrected. This period of time is when Ignacio got together with Gregor. After the whole enemies to lovers type shit happened, he was confused by how well he was treated— how at home he felt with Gregor. It was the same feeling of safety he got from being by Skiddad's side. Very confusing, especially during his time of grief. Eventually he caved to loneliness and fell into Gregor's warm embrace.

3. When Skiddad came back Ignacio felt overwhelming anxiety about the two meeting. You know what the cult does to priests. But Skiddad is much more composed as calculating than lower ranking members. He wouldn't kill Gregor, especially if his soul mate has feelings for him. He'd simply convert him instead. It may seem crazy, but indoctrination is a slow process to begin with, and I hc that Skiddad also has a Christian background before the cult. With coming from the same systems of beliefs, and having the same interest in Ignacio's health and safety, conversion would be a cinch. He doesn't mind Gregor being a permanent addition to the relationship if it makes Ignacio happy.

okay now onto some some lighter hcs

4. Ignacio gets smothered with affection from both Skiddad and Gregor.

5. Gregor is probably the only person who could ever fluster Skiddad. Unprompted and genuine kindness is not something he's used to. Skiddad slowly becomes aware of why Ignacio likes his priest so much.

6. (SUGGESTIVE) Skiddad has definitely gotten a kick out of teasingly calling Gregor "father". Gregor praying that he don't go to hell good lord.

7. (SUGGESTIVE) Skiddad- Top | Ignacio- Switch | Gregor- Bottom/Service Top, and that's that on that ✋🏾

8. Skiddad tries to relate to Gregor a lot under the guise of "being a pastor too," which he's trying to use to desensitize him to the idea of the cult.

9. Skiddad and Gregor were both raised in a chruch

10. Skiddad and Gregor both speak Latin

11. Skiddad and Ignacio both speak Spanish

12. English is Skiddad's third language

13. Skiddad calls Ignacio "starlight" and Gregor "Amate" (love). Gregor calls Ignacio "Spitfire" and Skiddad "angel eyes". Ignacio is too embarrassed to call either anything besides basic terms of endearment NDNDNDN

Ok lemme end there, there's more but I've written literally so much.

[multi-bookworm]

Why does nobody in this universe want to learn Greek like me :( making me sad, and bored, so I've made a list of all THE BENEFITS TO LEARNING GREEK:

1. The writing is really sexy. For example, even saying "you are a fish with a large forehead" looks beautiful

είσαι ένα ψάρι με μεγάλο μέτωπο

(even insulting someone is now gorgeous)

2. You could read Homer's odyssey or iliad with much less confusion since it will make more sense in the original language. Also you seem smarter reading the iliad or odyssey.

3. You seem really cool, this honestly comes with learning any new language, but Greek is connected to English, making it easier to learn, often, despite its complexity.

3. Understanding English itself will be easier since a large amount of the english language stems from Greek, as well as Latin, but Latin writing isn't quite as sexy (my own personal opinion, this is probably just because it is so similar to English, which is boring to me)

4. It is still spoken, as opposed to learning Latin, a dead language, making it easier to learn since you are more likely to have a conversation in it with somebody else.

5. The alphabet is interesting, as all foreign languages are, but the use of certain letters, how there are two different s's, three different i's and two different o's.

6. Interesting etymological origins from words. Some words came from myths, such as the man Narcissus, and particularly my favourite is when something is καλλίπυγος (Callipygious) which originated from an association with Aphrodite calling her Aphrodite Kallipygos, as well as roman reference of callipygian Venus. Callipygian means "one with/of beautiful buttocks," which I find to be quite hilariously accurate in addition to the common reference to Aphrodite in this manner.

7. If none of this enticed anybody and you dont think youll even go to greece so why bother, here are many things in Greece worth seeing:

A) THE MUSEUM IN ATHENS: multiple museums in Athens houses more history than the British Museum (that's saying a lot) with 11,000 artefacts in just the Natural Archaeological Museum in Athens alone (the British Museum has only 2,000 artefacts). Unlike many societies, they docked down much of what they did very early on so we have so much unscripted and crazy history from the Greeks alone in writing, and even moreso in their abundance of beautiful, detailed art. Even if you hate the Greeks (every country has done some bad things) it's still worth checking out the museums there just for historical knowledge and context, it will teach you a lot, i promise you that.

B) THE COASTAL WATERS: just look at the Mediterranean water, does that NOT make you want to jump in??

C) there are cats everywhere, particularly in Crete.

D) there are thousands of sites related to greek myths such as: the cave and temple of the Oracle of Delphi, which actually existed, and are still sometimes praised to Apollo today; Mount Olympus, the largest mountain in greece and worth a climb; the site where the Spartan Society thrived (my favourite society of all time, whom you should seriously check out here if you do not know already, if you do know... you should check it out also bc Weird History in yt really explains it accurately and in such a cool way).

E) greek culture. An ancient custom is to be kind to travellers, which was a belief that the traveller could be a God in disguise, so one always must treat them like a king and invite them into their home. (Again, this was an ancient custom, I'm not sure how prominent it would still be but it is a nice thought and the general public say that Greeks, particularly rural, are the loveliest people you will meet, for they have the strongest connection to this culture.) If you see blue roofs in greece this was a cultural belief as well, thought that rhat particular shade of blue would ward off evil spirits and protect the home from disease and impurity. Greece's long history of celebrated gods which are now well known worldwide through the many tales told about them and worship in their names.

If you still aren't enticed, that's okay, I am not offended, I'm just passionate I hope I didn't hurt anybody's feelings, and pls tell me if i have offended anyone who is greek themselves, because I am not greek, just heavily in love with your culture, so pls do correct me. Have a lovely day everybody :>

[xmaveria]

So in case folks do not know there has been an incredibly unjust act passed that has left the Venezuelan community in the US with panic and anger. The orange administration has passed immediate actions which literally strips the legal standing of Venezuelan refugees.

Kristi Noem, secretary for the U.S. Department of Homeland Security, rescinded the immigration protections for approximately 600,000 Venezuelans and stopped an extension filed by President Joe Biden in the last days of his presidency that would have allowed TPS recipients to remain in the U.S. until 2026.

This will affect their ability to have legal documents like a driver's license down to even holding a job. Making them vulnerable to ICE raids and encounters. Refugees programs from other countries are probably going down same path like Nicaragua, Haiti, Ukraine, El Salvador, Lebanon you get the picture. This country truly despises immigrants running away from regimes or tragedy.

This basically hands the sheep straight to the wolf in the name of moral goodness of "I'm for people returning to their home countries"

Ofc people are going along with this is going after criminals. But beloveds the top immigration official basically insinuated that every Venezuelan is a criminal from a gang and that Venezuela sent people here to sabotage the US LOL? There was never a room in their mind for exceptions bc immigrants are all the same in their minds, leeches and criminals.

The decision to remove TPS comes as a Trump administration official has been meeting with Maduro, negotiating the release of several American hostages. Pereira wonders why Republican members of Congress, long-time supporters of Democratic rule in Venezuela, aren't criticizing the decision to negotiate with the authoritarian regime. In the past, he says, "They always speak very hard against the Maduro regime. Now because Papi Trump is negotiating with Maduro, they close their mouth?" Venezuelan activist Beatriz Olavarria said that, for some, “returning would be almost suicidal.” Many Venezuelans have fled amid brutal crackdowns on protests against the government and struggles for basic goods such as food and medicine. “Some of those people that are here, that have spoken about the situation in Venezuela on cameras and everywhere, they set foot in Venezuela and they will be jailed”

People do not understand that the Venezuelan government will not kindly receive these refugees. When a regime that has caused even its soldiers to have dissented because of how bad things are, journalists, political prisoners that have escaped (which can range from I posted a funny meme from the other candidate to actually being another legal campaign running against Maduro) , and threatened its own people so much with death threats that they leave the country. Will they be received with open arms by this dictator now? I do not blame the Naturalized Venezuelans for their poor decision and support bc there is such a thing as being traumatized by a political party so much they vote the other no matter what (Something that is common in latam after regimes). They were stupid yes but still should not be dunked on by leftists saying they deserve this. The orange and US democracy is giving the dictator golden keys to begin punishing these ‘traitors’ in Latin America’s largest prison and make them disappear from existence. Essentially sending many to their deaths and torture. Estos son los mismos comentarios para Venezolanes en todo América, que ningún latine me venga con la vaina que todo esto solo lo hacen los gringos. Por favor vean que puedan hacer para imigrantes en sus paises.

Si alguien leyendo esto está en la incertidumbre, se que dicen que se puede cambiar pero quiero que sepan que eso se demora años. Por ejemplo esta decision paso después de SEIS años. Tomen iniciativa piensen en otros planes.

[eddiedefender]

“eddie is a bad father"

Since 7x09 aired, I've been seeing a lot of people saying that Eddie is a bad father, and it's just so ????????????? Have you even watched the show???????

I'm not denying the mistakes Eddie has made regarding Chris, especially during the first years of his life, but making mistakes does not automatically make him a bad parent. The important thing is that after making those mistakes, he has done everything in his power to correct them. He has always tried to shield him of whatever disasters or tragedies life has thrown at Chris.

So for those people, now I'm going to do a rundown of Eddie's and Chris' relationship, but I'm also going to be focusing on Eddie as a person and not only as a father. i tried to keep it in a chronological order. (I'm so sorry for any inconsistencies :( )

El Paso, TX.

Shannon and Eddie begin

Eddie and Shannon were never a healthy relationship. They are high school sweethearts who had to get married due to her getting pregnant accidentally at 19. High school relationships, especially the first ones, are almost never meant to last. Eddie forced himself to get married to her bc he felt it was the “right” thing, due to his catholic upbringing and subsequent catholic guilt. He automatically assumed his role, not bc he wanted, but because he felt like he Had to. This caused his marriage to be extremely dysfunctional.

Catholic guilt and his identity Eddie's catholic guilt is likely closely related to his identity as the son of Mexican immigrants. Catholicism in Latin America was introduced in a very traumatic and forced way by Spanish colonizers. Thousands of Native Americans were killed for refusing to converse to Catholicism, therefore causing Catholicism to become really intense in Latin America, a way in which it remains until now. Entire Latino countries values and laws circle back to catholic traditions, there is virtually no way to escape religion. This is then mixed with the innate sexism that is common in those countries, leaving a pretty extreme view of gender roles. When a kid is raised in these environments or, in eddies case, by people raised in these countries, their life will always be dictated by Catholicism rules, especially when the family is especially (extra) religious, as is implied in Eddie's case. Coming back to how people's life is dictated by Catholicism… this is especially true regarding matters of sexuality and gender. As we all know, Latino Catholicism has strict views regarding gender roles. A man should be the “provider” and “strong” and the woman should “take care of the family” and be “gentle”. That is basically what Eddie is. He always paints himself as the strong one, bottling up his emotions; and also thinks of himself as only the provider for the family. This heavily affected his relationship with Shannon. When he got her pregnant, he automatically assumed that role by marrying her.

Newfound “family”

His marriage and new “family” life caused to be so overwhelming that the only out he saw, was enlisting and going to war, leaving his newborn son and wife alone. All of this was done under the pretence of being the “provider” for his family, because he thought that was what they required from him. He didn't comprehend that his wife and kid also needed him emotionally. Sadly, that was never going to happen due to the very circumstances in which the family was created. He never loved Shannon enough to make things work between them; but he still tried, for the sake of Chris' and to give him a chance to have a proper family.

Shannon leaving

after coming back from war, Eddie and Shannon tried to live the “family life” but that came to be impossible and overwhelming for both of them. This time it was Shannon that left. When she left, Eddie ended up alone with his son, fresh out of the army and with a family that wanted to take away his kid. He instantly knew that Christopher could not go through the trauma of losing another parent. That's why he decided to fight his toxic family for Chris' custody and took him away to L.A., so that they could live and navigate their new family dynamic far away.

Los Angeles, California

Eddie begins again

When Eddie moved out to L.A. he was still discovering how to raise a kid with a disability and also fighting his parents for Chris' custody. He did everything he could to ensure his kid was well taken care of, shielding him from his own struggles. When he got the job at the 118, he still did his best to keep him in a sort of normal environment. Due to Chris' disability, this came to be more of a challenge, but Eddie never stopped trying to get him the extra help he needed by every means.

When he joined the 118 he met buck who then introduced them to Carla, the social worker. Then, Carla and Eddie started to work together, so that they could improve Chris' quality of life, always looking out for his happiness.

L.A. life

Besides Carla, Eddie also found his support system on the 118. These people always helped him in everything he required and became his friends; especially Buck, as his best friend. Eddie found in Buck a person very similar to him, one that had Chris' best interests at heart and someone that would fight tooth and nail for him. Seeing the positive impact buck made, he decided to make him a constant presence in Chris's life. This made nothing but improve both Chris' and Eddie's family life.

Nevertheless, life in L.A. was not so happy for Eddie. Although he had found a support system and strong friendships, he was still processing Shannon's absence. He always blamed her for leaving him and her son. However, he never made these concerns known to his son, as he didn't want Chris' to grow to hate his mother. The only people who knew about this were the 118, although he was always reluctant to be open about any feelings he experienced.

Shannon

All this came to a halt when Shannon came back to their already settled lives. At the beginning, Eddie tried to navigate his issues with Shannon, without letting Chris know that she had come back. He was afraid that Shannon would leave and therefore scar Chris again. He wanted to shield him from that pain.

After a while, Eddie decided that it was OK for Shannon to come back to Chris' life and for them to try to be a family again. During this time, Eddie and Shannon were still figuring out what they were and how they wanted their future to look like, while also living the family life for Chris' sake.

After navigating their family life and personal conflicts for a while, Shannon asked Eddie for a divorce. She died days after. This was a very big hit for both Eddie and Chris. They both navigated their grief together. It was not a perfect journey, but Eddie never stopped having Chris' best interests at heart.

(natural) Disasters

Soon after Shannon died, another tragedy hit Chris' life: the tsunami. Both tragedies resulted in Chris having recurring nightmares, sometimes blending the lines between his mother's death and the tsunami. Eddie was constantly worried about the state of his son, even though the latter was not opening up to him. He took him to the psychologist to see what he could do to make him feel better and process his emotions.

Mothers or girlfriends?

After Shannon's death, Eddie, maybe involuntarily, leaned back into the “provider” role, and he looked for someone to fill the “mother” role for Chris. His next relationships were solely based on how much Christopher liked his girlfriends. He was focused, perhaps too much, on what he thought was best for Chris. He never noticed that Chris' didn't need another maternal figure, he already had everything he needed in Buck, Carla, and the rest of the 118.

The only relationship he had, prior to L.A. was the one with Shannon. The outcome of that relationship left him severely traumatized and unable to form emotional bonds with women. And anxiety when thinking of a future or marriage with them. He only valued his girlfriends regarding on how much Chris' liked them, removing himself completely from his own relationship.

Grief

since Shannon died, Eddie has never got the chance, or given himself the chance, to grieve her properly. He has constantly bottled up his emotions, until he couldn't anymore, resulting in extreme reactions. Or, on the other hand, completely gaslighting himself into believing something that wasn't true.

First, soon after she died, while dealing with the aftermath of the tsunami and its impact on Chris' he stated to develop feelings of anger towards her. To try and “process” his rage, he turned to illegal fight clubs, only stopping when he almost killed a man. Eddie then confessed to bobby he did that so that he could keep his anger under control as to not let Chris down, seeing he was the only parent Chris had left.

Second, during the subsequent seasons, Eddie started to completely morph the mental image he had of Shannon and their relationship. Shannon suddenly became the epitome of motherhood and the perfect wife. He completely stripped her out of her humanity, putting her on a pedestal or an example he should seek to obtain. All of a sudden, they never had any marriage problems, and he even forgot that she asked him for a divorce. Their marriage was only perfect since the day she died.

His delusions have reached their breaking point in s7. He quickly fell down into a hole after seeing a girl similar to his wife. He started pursuing her, even though he already has a girlfriend. Also, leading this woman into a situationship without her knowing about the wife.

It was only after buck said something, that he realized that he wasn't even sure of what he wanted from Kim. He soon after came clean to her, and tried to stop their relationship. (then she matched his 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴 and actually got bangs and got into a weird role-play as shannon, to “try” to get Eddie to get over her, is suppose.... I don't even know what she was trying to do there😭😭😭😭). That is when Chris caught them. Eddie never intended for his son to see him in this broken state, and he had actually done a great job at hiding it until now.

This mistake does not erase how much Chris means to Eddie and all the things he has done to maintain Chris' wellbeing.

This is simply an example of a very broken man.

i wanted to clarify that when i refer to "catholicism" in the text im not talking about what the scriptures (Bible) say, i talk about how people interpret them in latam context. also im probably forgetting some things but I think this gets my point across.

[sunflowersandscreams]

finished the raven boys. exhale.

really good. holy shit what a downward spiral.

adam pressing charges and then slowly losing more and more control, which is one of the most important things to him and reflective of the nature of abuse (taking away someone's control). can't wait to read on to see what the consequences of him sacrificing himself are. also him living with his disability- I personally don't have hearing loss but i always love to read stories with disability elements, whether metaphorical or literal. also interested in if this is it with his family? because it feels like he has more to go through there. i also think there's a risk of him becoming more isolated at the church apartment(?). unsure. also him and blue are so sweet. i hope they don't crash and burn.

ronan- doesn't have the most massive part in this book. with his last line i suspect we'll go more in depth on his dream powers(?) later on. (wish the last scene and ronans line had been a bit more drawn out. it felt jarring and too much too fast). love him so far and hope there's more of his pov in the next book. what a piece of shit (affectionate).

noah- what the fuuuck. man. so I assume he just does not age? how will this relate to the others growing older and moving out and living their own lives? I assume at some point they'll kind of have to let him go? but very curious about who he was before he was a ghost/spirit.

whelk- holy moly. wish we'd gotten a little more on his background but i get that this book is kind of vague and ephemeral with details sometimes. his death felt very impactful because of how quickly his power was stripped away, i think. love the anti-gun sentiment through the book btw. truly nothing has ever been fixed with a gun.

neeve & maura- just a big question mark. especially with neeves ambitions and weird mask stuff. giving me the vibes of an evil mirror twin but I don't think that's the case. Maura i love you. she's sensible but a bit messy, much like blue. I have no idea where the dad plot point is going but eager to find out.

gansey- what's wrong with you fr. he's at his best when he's miserable <3 I love the flashes of him and blue. can't wait to see them fall in love and be star crossed lovers. hate his nickname as well as blue's. i don't see the appeal. fuck he's just so tragic. he falls in love with everyone he meets and he's very genuine but also naive in many ways bc of his privilege. him and ronan augvvh i can't wait to see more. him and Adam are soso bad for each other except when they're not. i can see why many people say polyamory for these people. (or maybe im just in an echo chamber.)

blue- my girl!! she has so much life and energy to her i really want to know why she doesn't have powers similar to her mother's and is only a magic amplifier. i wonder if she'll discover some? I like her interactions and her initial outsider sort of vibe but she's confident enough to fake it til she makes it and get in with the group. I wish they could be happy. love her attraction to everyone in the group, wanting to impress ronan, instant zing with Noah, sweetness with Adam, and banter with gansey. she's very brave but not in a way that feels hashtag badass in some 2010s YA lit. want to see her break down and lose her mind a bit though.

okay! those are my thoughts on characters. as for plot- something is very much starting. it feels like there are layers to this. with more books and gansey having searched in other countries for ley lines i hope we get some more settings outside of Henrietta, but keep a main focus on the town. cabeswater isn't done with them yet and there is something definitely sinister about it. i don't think it's a force for evil but definitely outside human morals and very very powerful.

I'm curious as to how the Latin fits in- to my knowledge this book has elements of Irish & Welsh folklore, and Latin reads more Roman to me? but maybe I'm uninformed & I might do more research into this after I've finished the whole series so i don't spoil myself.

okay. post done! again please don't spoil for future books.

[mistmessenger]

ab imo pectore | 1: omne initium difficile est

Royalty AU - Copia x Original female character

18+ MDNI

Content Warnings: Abusive parent (verbal and physical), violence, religious trauma, arranged marriage, eventual smut, some period-typical sexism down the line, some medieval torture graphic gore down the line (not relating to main characters)

Lord Copia is playing a long game, vying for a position and a life he has been working towards since his youth. The last thing he needed was a distraction from his goals and secrets, but his new assistant is a mystery that plagues him more than he would like. But if nothing else, Copia is insistent. As time goes by lines blur, curiosity gives way to lust, and Copia intends to get what he wants.

Wren Greye's comfortable life is flipped when she is dragged to Zenia. A demotion from her previous role, reluctantly having to engage in the chore of courtship lest she be labelled a spinster, all while navigating life in the busy palace. Instilled with her father's paranoia, friends are few and far between. In spite of her reluctance, Wren begins to find herself drawn to the strange man she assists, itching to tear down her walls and let someone in.

Dropping this here and going to hide in bed bc I've been talking myself out of posting it for ages now.

This started as a single scene about a year ago and now I have about 50k words in the drafts for this. I haven't written or posted any fanfic in about 15 years so this is probably rusty as hell but I've reached a point of 'fuck it, that'll do' with the first three chapters.

Chapter names will probably all be somewhat relevant latin phrases because I'm awful with picking names. Planning to add specific warnings for each chapter but if I miss anything please do let me know. Recently reshuffled this to follow the recent interview where it was suggested Papa I-III are all Nihil's brothers because that helped fix some plot holes. Other than describing clothes I've tried to leave appearance of Wren and her family fairly non-descript (but she is a shameless self insert tbh).

Chapter 1: omne initium difficile est

Copia squeezed his eyes shut as his aide shaved him.  The masked figure towered over him, making quick work of the shave with a precise and steady hand.

Copia had woken up with an intense sense of irritation this morning, his leg now bouncing impatiently as he waited for this to be over.  

He opened his eyes upon hearing the aide step back, and the quiet clink of the razor against the sink basin. Examining his work in the mirror, his neat sideburns and moustache, Copia nodded slowly.

"Thank you, Aether. That will be all for now."

The aide nodded in return, leaving Copia by himself. Hurriedly, he began applying his paints, coating his right eye and top lip with the black cream.

He allowed himself one last look with both eyes at the dull morning light pouring through his window, before taking his eye patch from his bedside, tightly securing it around his head to mask his left eye.

As he did every morning at this stage of his routine, he recalled the stern warning given to him by the strange nun who had taken him away from the orphanage to become a ward to Duke Psaltarian and his wife, the King’s sister..

"You must never allow anyone else to see it. Your life depends on it."

And still, decades later, he obliged. Aside from his closest aides and his adoptive parents, the entire palace were under the impression that Copia had lost his sight due to a dreadful infection in infancy, leaving the socket disfigured. As a nervous child, and now as a strange standoffish middle aged man, it had always been easy to convince people that he was too insecure about its appearance to ever be seen without the patch.

Copia elected to wear his red suit today. It made him feel confident, and lord knows he needed that today. As he walked to his office, the pit in the depths of his stomach seemed to grow as he thought about what awaited him in the day ahead.

Upon entering his office, the piles of parchments strewn across his desk, the old ledger books sitting around the room, missing from their slots in dusty bookshelves caused him to sigh. He set himself to the task, adamant that he would tidy the place up a bit. The last thing he wanted was his new assistant to think he was a slob.

Well, the second last thing.

The last thing he truly wanted was to be stuck with this new assistant.

Copia's previous assistant in his treasury duties had unfortunately succumbed to a fever the previous winter. It had been intensely irritating for Copia. It had taken him the guts of a decade to mould him into a halfway decent assistant, and now here he was having to start all over again.

The council had attempted to enlist multiple replacements in the interim, but none of them lived up to Copia's standards. Too sloppy, too slow, not sharp enough, generally insufferable - he always found some fault.

He had elected that it was easier to manage the work himself. But that had been driving him to exhaustion.

A month prior, Copia had found himself in less of a council meeting, and more of an intervention. The chapel master of the council - High Sister Imperator, the nun that had saved him from a life of destitution - piped up to insist that a replacement must be found.

He had been infuriated that day, feeling as if the whole meeting was a parade of all his shortcomings in front of the whole council. As if he needed any excuse for that bastard King to mock and cast doubt on his abilities.

This particular new assistant was Edwin Greye's idea. Nihil's chancellor of foreign affairs and Duke of Embercliff, one of Nihil's closest advisors.

His third child, the second youngest. Well, child wasn't quite the word.

Wren Greye was well into her twenties, and was already the current acting treasurer of Embercliff during her father's absence at court. As the second largest dutchy in Meliorus, Edwin reasoned that she would be more than capable of merely assisting Copia in his duties as treasurer for the whole Kingdom.

In spite of Copia's protests, the rest of the council voted in favour of bringing the girl to the capital for this role.

The whole idea filled Copia with discomfort - he hated owing anyone a favour, especially Edwin of all people. It wasn't that he hated the man. In fact he rather respected him, his no nonsense approach, and his ability to placate Nihil. But the man was cunning - if the girl turned out to be useless to Copia, he would be stuck with her regardless. He was not a man Copia wanted as an enemy, not yet.

If the girl wasn't up to standard, he would have no choice but to mind his temper and train her.

Edwin had admitted that the appointment would allow him to take greater control of his courtship. It was a rare source of embarrassment for the usually self-assured man - his daughter reaching almost her third decade and still unwed.

Her father spent most of his time residing at the palace, only spending a few weeks at a time in Embercliff, leaving ruling of the city to his son. The remaining family didn't press the girl to engage in courtship, and she gladly shirked the ordeal, preferring her own company.

At least, Copia thought, they might have one thing in common.

In spite of the numerous interruptions throughout his day, Copia had managed to make quite a dent in the mess of his office. The smaller desk in the corner of his room, once used by his previous assistant was now useable.

He grimaced as he stood back and evaluated his progress.

He had grown used to the quiet of his office. Even with his old assistant, they had been quiet, not torturing Copia with inane platitudes and small talk throughout the day.

Now that sanctuary would be imposed upon once again. The last attempt the court had hired had been a talker, incessantly chattering away as they worked - it might have been forgivable if their work had been up to scratch. But the errors in their calculations… Copia shuddered remembering just how many corrections he had to make from their few short days of employment.

If the Greye girl was a chatterbox, Copia was not sure he could take it.

Copia sat at his desk with a single candle for what seemed like an age. He was taking it in, the serenity, savouring it while he still could.

Eventually his peace was disturbed by a knock on the door. Copia rolled his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Yes, come in."

The tension in his shoulders eased as he recognised the imposing figure of his aide. "Aether… They have arrived then?"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wren was exhausted.

Days of travel to reach the capital, all narrated by her father's incessant lecturing, scolding her for anything and everything - things she had done wrong as a child, how she still wasn't wed, and hell, even mistakes she hadn't even made yet.

If it wasn't for his insistence of finding her a husband, he would never have dreamed of dragging her here.  Lord knows they both would have preferred that.

Wren's life was mostly peaceful, especially the last decade or so, with her father spending most of his time away from them in the capital. Living without him breathing down her neck at every moment to find something to berate had been something close to bliss.

Allowing her to act as treasurer to Embercliff had been unexpected in a way, given that she seemed unable to do anything right in his eyes. But of all their family, she was the most capable. After five years in the role, she begrudged passing the reigns to someone else just to become a glorified assistant in the capital.

The hour was late when they arrived, and Wren had been almost delirious to see a proper bed once she was guided to the quarters that had been arranged for her. It was larger than her room in the fortress back home, with more space than she knew what to do with.

Of course, the rooms were not too far away from her father’s, ideal for keeping an eye on who came and went from her. Or paying his bloody spies to watch for him.

She was itching for some peace from him after the days of travel, ready to tear her hair out after spending so much time together.

Wren had began to help Ava, her handmaiden, unpacking her belongings when her father briskly paced into the room, clicking his fingers.

"Come along."

"Sorry, father?" She frowned, wondering what else they would have to do at this hour that couldn't wait until the morning.

"We're meeting with Copia. We should have been here a day and a half ago. I won't keep him waiting any longer. Come on, now."

Wren waited until his back was turned before she pulled a face at him, rolling her eyes as he snapped his fingers at her once again, as if she was a damned dog.

Sighing, she trailed along behind him.

She took in the architecture and decorations of the castle as best she could in the dim light, wide eyed at the extravagance of it all.

A sudden pinch to her arm quickly snapped her out of her awe stricken state.

"Keep up girl,” her father snapped.

"Of course, sorry." Wren took a deep breath, steadying her breathing to try and compose herself. She felt the familiar heat in her cheeks in response to the pain and embarrassment of being treated like a disobedient child.

It had been days of this. Pinches, kicks, shoves. Physical reminders that she was failing to act in accordance with her father's high standards if she so much as cleared her throat out of turn.

Before long, they had reached the door to Copia's private quarters.

Wren felt the hairs on her neck standing as one of Copia's aides guided them into the room. She had heard about the palace aides when she was growing up. Silly children’s stories and rhymes about how misbehaving children were sent to the palace to feed the ghouls.

The few she had seen since her arrival sent chills through her, their eerie metal masks and husky voices giving them an otherworldly appearance.

Her study of this particularly intimidating aide was interrupted as Copia stood to greet them.

"Duke Greye, you've finally returned. I trust your travels were eh… adequate."

She turned her gaze to the man, staying quiet as the pair talked, studying him. She purposely stood off to the side as his attention was tuned on her father, on Copia's left. With only one eye, she wasn't even sure if he had noticed her.

She had to admit he seemed very well put together, his facial hair styled neatly, and his red suit particularly eye catching to her. She wasn't used to seeing such extravagant outfits in Embercliff, at least, not for a simple meeting. The richness and flamboyancy of the capital was something she was going to have to adapt to. 

"Copia. I will admit, I am glad to be back in the familiarity of the Palace. Allow me to introduce my daughter. Wren…"

Giving her a pointed look, Edwin ushered her forwards. Her throat felt dry as she met the man's eye.

There was an intensity in his gaze. Maybe it was because of the eye patch, maybe it was his sharp features, but Wren suddenly felt like she was two feet tall.

"Lord Copia, it's a pleasure." Unable to stand meeting his eye any longer, she looked to the floor as she offered him her hand.

"Lady Greye, yes. It's… eh, wonderful to meet you."

Copia could feel the way her body stiffened as he brought her hand to his mouth, lightly pressing his lips against it.

She wasn't what he expected. For her be unwed against her parents wishes at this age he had expected her to have an air of defiance about her.

But the woman in front of him looked like she wanted the ground to swallow her whole.

Not to mention, Copia had expected her to be a carbon copy of her mother and older sister, whom he had met before.  The similarities were there of course, but the finesse and lavish style of the pair were seemingly lost on Wren. She wore simple riding slacks, and a plain dress shirt, adorned with a few metal broaches.

Copia guided the pair to a table by the balcony doors of his rooms, giving his aide a nod.

"I'll have some food brought up. You two must be famished, hm?"

Wren wanted to run and hide in her room, to sleep off some of her exhaustion, to dream that she didn't have to give up the peace of her life in Emberclfif to work with this unsettling man. At the mention of food she was about to object, the shaking of her head stopped by a discrete kick in her shin from Edwin.

She cleared her throat, smiling politely, but still not able to look right at the man.

"That's very kind of you, my Lord. Thank you."

Her father and Copia began discussing what news Edwin had missed out on while he was gone. Wren stared at the table as she listened, only averting her eyes when the aide returned with plates of bread and cheese for them. She studied the figure’s silver mask, before her eyes fell to his torso. Perhaps it was her tiredness, but she was sure she couldn’t spot the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed.

From the corner of his eye, Copia watched Wren as he talked with her father.

This was going to be worse than he thought. She appeared to be completely out of her depth, eyeing his ghoul with an almost horrified expression. Everything about her, even the way she ate, appeared as if she was trying to make herself invisible.

After Copia had finally caught her father up on the few council meetings he had missed, he turned his full attention to her. In truth, he had been using the conversation with her father to stall, to give him time to figure out what to even say to her. He had found himself struck by one of those sudden bouts of awkwardness that cursed him from time to time.

“Young Wren… how are you finding the Capital so far?”

“It seems nice, so far my Lord.”

She kept her tone courteous, not saying too much, and acutely aware of her father’s eyes boring into her.

“And your quarters, they are eh, to your liking?”

“Very much so, my Lord.”

Copia could tell her responses were well rehearsed platitudes. It reminded Copia of his younger years. How he spent his youth as a ward reciting what he hoped was the correct responses, to avoid inflicting offence on these easily startled nobles. He sighed, giving her a small knowing smile. Not that it mattered, since she had gone back to looking around the room, anywhere but at him or her father.

It was going to take him some time to get a read on the girl. But he didn’t mind that. He quite enjoyed a puzzle.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wren stood at the door, having just reminded herself that she can’t just barge in. This wasn’t the comfort of her own offices back home.

Taking a deep breath, she sighed, knocking on the door.

She was not worried about her abilities for the role, as perhaps she should be. But rather dreaded the thought of sitting in uncomfortable silence with the strange man in charge of the treasury.

Before long, the door swung open, Copia towering above her, glaring intensely with his uncovered eye.

“My lord.”

“Miss Graye. Come in.” Copia sighed as he stood aside to let the woman into his office.

“Thank you, my Lord.”

“You’ll be working at this desk. I need you to finish compiling the most recent militia expenditure reports. You should have everything you need there.”

Wren nodded, sensing something unspoken.

You’ll have everything you need. So don’t bother me.

She sat at the desk, beginning to sort through the reports, skimming over them.

She allowed herself to get distracted, nosying at what the other duchies were spending.

He had only complied two of the reports together so far. That of Zenia, the capital, and… Embercliff. She recognised the report. She had written it months ago right after the quarter end, promptly sending it away to the Palace. Only for it to sit in a pile for all these months. She was beginning to see why he needed an assistant.

Silently she cast her eyes over the calculations. She frowned, quickly adding the numbers, not daring to speak until she was certain.

“This is wrong.”

“Excuse me?”

“This is wrong, my Lord. The calculations. You’ve-“ She caught herself, realising accusing her superior of laxness in her first hour in the role would perhaps not be wise. “There seems to be an error here in the third column. Two numbers the wrong way around.”

He raised an eyebrow at her pause, noting the self censoring of her own words. Quietly, Copia stood, pacing to stand behind her, examining the ledgers while feigning a thoughtful hum. This close, he could smell the warm notes of her perfume, picking out notes of spices and berries.

“Quite so. Correct it, then.” He spoke cooly.

If she hadn’t found him so unsettling to look at, she might have caught a glimpse of the way his eye narrowed at her, the edge of his mouth twitching, almost allowing a smirk to cross his features.

She had passed the first test relatively quickly.

Perhaps, he thought, this wouldn’t be so bad after all.

Wren bristled.

Correct it, then.

Said so casually, as if it was a simple fix. The mistake was on the second page of a five page document, causing the sums on the other three pages to be wrong as a result. Time that needed to be wasted in rewriting those three pages.

She sighed, reaching for some blank parchment and beginning the process of rewriting it all.

It was just a simple mistake, of course, anyone could have made it. But he made it. And he was entrusted with the treasury of the whole kingdom. Had she made the mistake herself she would have been mortified when it was pointed out to her, not acting as if it was a simple smudge of ink.

She felt like a glorified scribe.

By the end of her first day in his office, she felt like she was going to go mad. Either he was not fit for his role, or he was trying to trick her. She leaned toward the latter. From her father’s forewarnings, Copia was sneaky. And she had heard about his revolving door of assistants as of late.

Each time she found a mistake, five today in total, he brushed it off as if it was some simple oversight.

The idea that he was doing it on purpose filled her with paranoia. Had her father set him up to it? To try and catch her out, any excuse to remind her of her shortcomings.

Or was it simply how he was?

Life in the palace was a game. The rules of which she was unfamiliar with. She knew she would need to learn fast before her paranoia would torment her.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two weeks in, Wren finally felt confident in the layout of the castle. Her horse, Tantillus, had been brought from Embercliff, and she had been spending her evenings riding throughout the grounds.

Leaving the stables, she turned a corner only to collide with something, wincing in pain as she stumbled backwards hearing a metallic clang.

She looked up to find she was being stared down by a pair of mismatched eyes.

“Your grace, my apologies.”

Knight Terzo, the kings youngest brother was glaring at her, his black hair tousled and falling around his eyes. He stayed silent, putting her on edge. The silence seemed to last an age before he grinned, laughing at her.

“You should see the look on your face!”

“I…?”

Terzo snickered as he shook his head, stretching his hand out to her.

“No need to look so frightened, I’m not going to behead you for bumping into me. I had you going for a second, hm?”

“You… you did, my Grace. Oh. Wren Greye. Sorry, I mean, Lady Greye of Embercliff. Honoured to meet you.” With a confused blink she shook his hand.

“Terzo Emeritus at your service, my lady.” He chuckled, poking fun at her formality, “Come along, I’ll walk you back to the palace. Couldn’t let a fair maiden make such a dangerous journey alone at this late hour.”

“It’s still light out. I think I’ll manage.”

“Well, luckily for you, Wren, I’m heading back to the palace anyway. So tell me, how are you settling in?”

She smiled, noticing how informal he was. It was a refreshing change from all the stiffness of the rest of the castle’s nobility.

“Good, it’s a very beautiful place. Growing up here must have been wonderful.” It was another platitude, one which she hoped she rhymed off with enough conviction.

“Yes, yes. I remember being a young boy and thinking ‘good heavens. All this intricate architecture, those marble columns, aren’t I a lucky boy?’”He scoffed, “Come now, be honest. I assure you I can handle it.”

A breathy laugh escaped Wren, and she held her hands up, “Alright, alright. It’s nice, but I’d rather be home.”

“But don’t tell your father, because you should be so grateful for this opportunity, hm?”

Wren pouted for a second at his words. He was right, that she couldn’t deny, but she was suspicious, something he clearly saw right through.

“It might comfort you to know I don’t encounter your father very often. In fact he’s someone I go out of my way to avoid.”

Wren raised an eyebrow, “You don’t like him?”

“I don’t.”

Wren studied him, trying to determine if he was joking with her again. But he seemed serious now, his lips set in a straight line.

“I… why you are talking to me then?” she whispered conspiratorially. While she wasn’t surprised her father wasn’t exactly liked throughout the palace, she was intrigued to hear someone talk ill of him so openly in front of her. Dealing with the falseness of the palace, Wren found his openness refreshing.

“Because you happened to be here. And quite frankly you look like you need the company. The palace can be overwhelming. And I’m sure Copia isn’t exactly engaging you in thrilling conversations, hm?”

He snickered when he mentioned Copia, while placing a reassuring hand on her back.

“What, you don’t like him either?” She let out an incredulous chuckle at his cynicism, neglecting to mention that when it came to Copia, she was the one who struggled with conversing.

“Quite the contrary, actually. He spent a lot of time here when we were both growing up, I’ve rather a soft spot for him. But he is… let’s say… antisocial.” There was a sincerity in his voice, something in his eyes as he spoke about Copia that made Wren feel like he truly valued him.

“With that being said, your appointment seems to be making a vast improvement already. He’s full of energy, actually has some time to look after himself.”

“That’s… good?” She found it hard to fathom that Copia might actually himself agree, when he seemed to see her as a nuisance whenever she worked with him in his office.

Terzo grinned, “It is good, yes. I couldn’t tell you the last time I had a chance to drink with him. We used to play cards regularly. I made quite an earning in beating him you know?”

Wren shook her head, his grin infectious.

“Well, I’m glad I could be of service to your pocket, your Grace.”

As they continued back to the palace, an idea formed in her mind. Something had been bugging Wren since she had arrived. A question to which the answer, a palace knight was bound to know. And not just any palace knight, but a highly ranked one who was raised in the castle.

“Say, your Grace, you grew up here. Were the rooms ever remodelled? Like, adding new doors?”

It earned her a raised eyebrow from Terzo, “what a strange question, why do you ask?”

She wondered if she should ask, but she had been so paranoid about it, she pressed ahead.

“There’s a door at the back of the wardrobes in my quarters. Um… I’m sure it’s nothing.”

“But…?” His eyes narrowed, the edge of his lip quirking into a mischievous smirk.

“Av- My maid and I, we tried to pry it open, and it sounds hollow when we knock on it… I just wondered if it led somewhere. It’s a silly idea.”

Looking around quickly to ensure there was no one within earshot, Terzo whispered. “Not silly at all Wren. An excellent find in fact. This palace has its secrets, much like the people dwelling in it.” He grinned, “You’ve asked just the right person.”.

It felt like the first spark of a match, the first moment since her arrival that Wren felt she had someone she could be herself with. And although his grin filled her with some nervousness, the idea that whatever he was scheming could get her into hot water, it didn’t seem to matter to Wren.

Perhaps, she thought, this wouldn’t be so bad after all.

[playingplayer2]

So. In the middle of a Percy Jackson hyperfixation. That happens every 6-18 months, it's normal.

(This of course, always brings to the forefront, my lifelong fascination and interest in Greco-Roman mythology (my mother prefers Roman (*cough* Latin *cough*) things, I've always preferred Greek. I subjected both my mom and siblings to like 2 hours of who and why my favourite Greek gods are my favourites. Should have spent more time on Hestia, inll have to do that tmrw, but my mom didn't know who Asclepius was, so I had to rectify that ASAP, also I had to give a verbal essay on Ares because that's just how I roll, and then I had to justify liking Apollon because my mom's knows a number of his myths, so I started with listing off domains and some more of his myths which led to the Asclepius bit. So. Yeah. Anyways-)

Right, so, last night I was like "hey mom, Greek or Roman?” because. Like. I was remembering some post- I think it was on here actually- about how instead of thinking about which god/dess you think you'd be a demigod of, but rather which god/dess your 'mortal' parent would pull.

And she was like "context" and I was like "because" and so she said "Norse." And I was like "uhhhhhhhhhhg mom no"

Because this is so easy for me. Soooooo easy. Riordanverse gods? Easy easy easy. My mom would totally be pulling Hephaestus. My sibling? Could fit into cabin 9 just fine.

(my argument to my mother was "tinker tinker, engine engine, keyboard keyboard" (got the most goddamn deadpan-but-affronted stare lmfao) and "tell me what you would if you had access to a forge" and then she and my sibling both started talking and while my mom was like "oooooo" my sibling was all "well technically you could make a small forge pretty easily-" and my mom was like "you're just proving the point" and I just started into the corner like in the office) (my other idea was Minerva bc my mom looovesssss fiber arts and architecture and math and science and art and history and learning and and and. Or maybe Demeter because my mom's always been interested/invested in gardening and permaculture and stuff. (I just want a rose garden and a poisonous plant garden and my favourite fruits.))

Problem is me.

Me and building things? Eh. Weaving? Cool but not my main thing, much more interested in how to make and use the dyes. Metalwork? Not a chance. I'd probably accidentally kill myself by blinking or something. No actually I'd roast like a turkey in the oven. Computers? Shoot me in the gut, it'd be kinder. Architecture? Love it, wouldn't be able to do it, way too much math and math and physics are my second biggest weaknesses right after electronic technology and navigating maps.

I like painting. Healing. Archery. Poetry. Singing- gods I love singing. Bit awful at it though. Hell most of my morals are based around protecting people who need protecting.

(I mean fuck, I learned about "noblesse oblige" when I was like 4 and it shaped me permanently and got invested in The Art of War before I was 12)

Would my mom ever go for, SPECIFICALLY, riordanverse!Apollo? Absolutely not. Not even a little bit. Would he go for her? Back when she had me and my sibling? Maybe. Probably not. Hephaestus, Minerva, Demeter. They're much more likely. (I would die; not interested/skilled in the right things; love plants, but they need to be kept outside....)

So. Shoe-in for Apollo, right? My friends thought so in middle school. So. Maybe.

But me? No.

However. How. Ever. Mars. Not Ares, Mars.

Namely aspects like strategy and protection, also as a harvest god. Those could fit.

My mom... She's got really strict morals. She's also pretty strategic, prefers if people would be straightforward and blunt, and though she doesn't like war or bloodshed, nor do I, really, but she can understand them. I guess. We don't agree on everything. I'm a lot more willing to spill blood if it means conflict drawing to a close. Neither of us like senseless violence of any kind. We both value honor. Though I think it means different things to us.

Tbh, most of my reasoning for Mars is ... More personal. Not personal for me, whatever I overshare on the internet regularly. But like personal for my mom. So just know I've got good arguments.

Anyways. I think in the world of Percy Jackson, my sibling would be a demigod child of Hephaestus (I would say Vulcan, but my mom pointed out that she knows more about Hephaestus than she does Vulcan), and I would be a demigod child of Mars.

[devildevotee]

how do you banish a demon/agressive spirit? everyone says to learn but never gives any recourses or flat out steps.

reposting this disclaimer in case you didn't see it:

nonnie, one thing: my method for exorcism is satanic in nature. i don't practice the christian OR general-heavily-popular-kinda-wiccan-flavoured method to banishing. in my experience neither one of these have worked for me bc demons are very powerful spirits, and they only manage to offend, disrespect, and piss off the demon in question and encourages it to show its power. i just wanted to post this as a warning that my method may not work for you, and if it isn't, then i suggest doing your own research (getting books on protection magic is a good start) and see what resonates with you and makes you feel powerful.

that being said, here's some precautions on banishing demons. i'm not approaching aggressive spirits, because i feel they're not comparable on a general level.

be polite and respectful, always. if you can, request it to leave first and foremost to avoid having to force it out. a common occurrence i've seen in the witchblr community is to get really, really aggressive with banishing and i'm just here to say that when it's concerning a demon, that's not gonna work for you. the reality of the situation is you are not more powerful than the demon. you're a human, and that demon is a grizzly bear. you cannot intimidate the metaphorical bear into leaving if it does not want to leave. pretending to be more powerful than the demon is just going to either make it angry, or make an example of its power. you must respect that a demon is just simply stronger than you and in most cases, will not be afraid of you in any situation.

once the demon is banished, you do not contact it again. you don't say its name, you don't write its name, you don't talk about it, it is dead to you. in my experience, demons are pretty attuned to the energy behind mentioning or thinking intentionally about them. it's part of the reason why most people think about a demon only for the demon to initiate contact soon after. that being said, if you struggle with compulsive thoughts, don't worry - intentionally thinking about them, purposefully thinking about them, putting energy into thinking about them is what they're more likely to pay attention to.

now, the banishing itself. do you know how to summon a demon? because you're gonna need to know how to summon a demon.

the reality of the situation is that christian-approaches to exorcism has never worked for me, and that's because i put zero power into believing that calling up an angel's boss is just not going to work. yes, god is powerful. no, a demon has never cared about me calling up the neighbour store's boss when they work at their own store. you want to contact their boss. they are an employee of their own unique store owner and that's who you want in this situation, because it's their store owner that's responsible for their payments, job, and experiences.

what am i saying with this? i genuinely believe satan, lucifer, or a king that governs over a lot of demons will be much more effective in banishing the demon. that's who they pay attention to! that's who they respect the most! it just makes sense to me, and thus, because it makes sense to me, that gives the banishing power.

now, the part that's homework for you: look into satan, lucifer, or a king who resonates with you. bond with them some, talk to them about your issues. i'm not going to order you on the 'correct' method on how to summon them (as it's different for everyone), but if you can't think of any methods/aren't used to these methods, a very general suggestion is lighting an appropriately-coloured candle (satan loves red or black, lucifer loves white or yellow, and kings have yet to turn away a gold candle for me), lighting some appropriate incense, giving them an offering of food or drink, and playing their enn (i've also seen people recently practice latin-based summoning if an enn isn't for you) and praying to them during. again, get personal with it! cry to them if you need, request their help on a personal level. they will hear you out.

and then, the hardest part, is trusting them to take care of it. they are generous spirits and the most difficult obstacle is simply leaving them to complete the banishing. but it's worth it. this has never failed me, provided the demon did not leave when i dropped contact/requested it to leave.

hope this helps! i just got your second ask, so i'll read that and answer right away.

[twoidiotwriters1]

Daughter of Olympus (Leo Valdez xFem!Oc)

A/N: The titles are long af bc I find that very funny -Danny Words: 3,948 Series' Masterlist Previous Chapter / Next Chapter Listen to: 'Runaway' -by Aurora

V. Memory Lane Has Too Many Stops and I Keep Getting Carsick

Ara has barely stopped crying when Leo Valdez shows up flying the bronze dragon. Everyone stands ready, except Ara. She pushes through the crowd, eyes brimming with tears once again.

"People of Earth, I come in peace!" Leo is the most insane-looking boy she's ever seen. He's dirty from head to toe and looks like he spent the whole night awake. "Festus is just saying hello!"

"That thing is dangerous! Kill it now!"

"Stand down!" Jason shouts anxiously, Annabeth and Nyssa stand next to him. "Leo, what have you done?"

"Found a ride!" He says cheerfully. "You said I could go on the quest if I got you a ride. Well, I got you a class-A metallic flying bad boy! Festus can take us anywhere!"

"Festus..?" Ara echoes hoarsely.

"It—has wings," Nyssa stammers.

"Yeah! I found them and reattached them."

"But it never had wings! Where did you find them?"

"In... the woods," he's hiding something, but Ara couldn't care less about it at the moment. "Repaired his circuits, too, mostly, so no more problems with him going haywire."

"Mostly?"

The dragon tilts his head and oil falls on top of Leo. He's completely unbothered by it. "Just a few kinks to work out."

Ara's mind catches up with her body and she runs to Festus in tears. Leo jumps out of the way in alarm, but everyone else is delighted. She looks less menacing this way. "You fixed it! You fixed my dragon!"

Leo frowns. "Say what?"

"But how did you survive?" Nyssa asks in shock. "I mean, the fire breath..."

"I'm quick," he turns to his sister. "And lucky. Now, am I on this quest, or what?"

"You named him Festus?" Jason adds. "You know that in Latin, 'Festus' means 'happy'? You want us to ride off to save the world on Happy the Dragon?"

"It's perfect!" Ara laughs, the first genuine laughter that comes out of her in days, and gods, it feels so good.

"Okay, so she's as crazy as me," Leo doesn't sound troubled by it. Festus purrs at Ara's touch, she's holding onto his snout. "That's a yes! Now, um, I'd really suggest we get going, guys. I already picked up some supplies in the—um, in the woods. And all these people with weapons are making Festus nervous."

"But we haven't planned anything yet. We can't just—"

"Go," Annabeth stares at them with fondness. "You have Ara, you'll be okay. You've only got three days until the solstice now, and you should never keep a nervous dragon waiting. This is certainly a good omen. Go!" 

Jason looks at Piper. "You ready, partner?"

"You bet." The girl's beaming at the dragon.

"Everyone, give our General a proper send-off!" Lily speaks next to her, which causes Ara to jump. She hates it when Lily does that.

The campers lift their shields and swords. Lily places a Tyrian purple cloak on Ara's shoulders and hands her a worn T-rex backpack. "Come back alive," she raises her left hand, and a thin scar can be seen on the side of her wrist. "Deal?"

Ara lifts her right wrist and lightly presses it against Lily's. "You got it." She turns to look at the campers. "I'll bring you good news this time, I promise," Ara faces Leo, the insane boy, and her eyes fill with gratitude. "I owe you a big one."

"Cash only, sunshine. Or a kiss, if you're feeling generous," Leo jokes, trying to stop her from looking at him like that.

Ara smiles, which is not the reaction he wanted. He's hoping she'll go back to being grumpy soon, but unfortunately, nothing's going to make her forget his great deed. "I'll think about it."

She climbs on top of the dragon, and Leo does an okay job at keeping it together. Ara feels this is where she's meant to be, this will bring back her brother. She's always had a good instinct when it comes to Percy.

I'm weaving baskets when this weird thought crosses my mind: 

Look for Percy!

I saw him fifteen minutes ago, but I tell the naiads and nymphs that are with me: "Go get help." They notice how serious I am—which is unlike me—and follow my plea. I make my way to the forest, something is guiding me.

When Percy fought Ares, I gave him Aphrodite's protection. I told him "Love will keep you safe", and at the time he thought that I was saying it to not be the only one that hadn't given him something, but I knew it would work. I didn't know that it would bind me to him, but I'm not complaining.

When I find him, Percy sounds scared. "You're being used, Luke. You and Ares both. Don't listen to Kronos."

"I've been used? Look at yourself. What has your dad ever done for you? Kronos will rise. You've only delayed his plans. He will cast the Olympians into Tartarus and drive humanity back to their caves. All except the strongest—the ones who serve him."

I throw my basket at the back of Luke's head, trying to give Percy time so he can grab his sword. Luke turns and holds his weapon tighter. He has a new sword. "I've had enough!"

I stumble and cut my palm on a rock, I grab it and hear Percy's panicky voice. "Don't!" I don't know who he's talking to, but neither of us listens. The rock hits Luke's arm and I roll to avoid his blade but it grazes my skin. I grab a fistful of dirt and throw it at his face.

Percy swats whatever creature is on his leg and draws out his sword, Luke notices and decides I'm not worth the trouble, he makes an arch-motion with his weapon and disappears through a portal. I'm scared shitless and I can feel my back pulsing, I wanna run and hide behind someone again. 

"I'm sorry!" I cry, even though I'm not the one who almost killed Percy.

He stumbles toward me in some sort of pain, and I'll be damned if I don't help him out of this one. I put his left arm around my shoulders, and he places most of his weight on me, but I carry on.

"Cool, right?" Leo's smell is starting to get a little too hard to ignore, Ara tries to keep his oil-covered self away. 

"What if we get spotted?" Piper asks.

"The Mist," Jason responds before Ara can. "It keeps mortals from seeing magic things. If they spot us, they'll probably mistake us for a small plane or something."

"You sure about that?"

"No."

"I am," Ara replies. "Don't worry, Piper, the crazier it gets, the harder it is for mortals to notice. If not, I know how to fix it."

"Is it thanks to the cool thing you are?" Leo asks.

"Yeah, Chiron had to readjust my training, not everyone can control the mist, but Thalia Grace is really good at it and she and Chiron taught me, she's the other child of Zeus."

"We're making good time," Jason comments like he's trying to change the subject. "Probably get there by tonight."

"Where are we heading?" Piper questions.

"To find the god of the North Wind and chase some storm spirits." 

"Piece of cake," Ara nods. "I've gone to many quests, follow your instincts and we'll be okay."

"Which reminds me!" Leo adds. "You didn't finish your story! You promised you would explain!"

Ara frowns. "Where was I?"

"That Luke dude went nuts."

She pauses, trying to piece her memories together. "Well, the nymphs took us back to camp..."

Percy's really weak after Luke's attack. Annabeth left half an hour ago, and I'm standing on the porch clinging to my friend's arm. "You're going too, aren't you?" 

The basket I was weaving when I found him is at my feet, I made it for Grover. Percy says he might not come back at all. Grover, Annabeth, and Percy are the closest friends I've had and they're leaving. I want Percy to stay.

"I want to be with my mom, Ara."

"I wish I had a family," I make a face.

Percy pats my hand, I would rather have him glaring, but Annabeth says he's got a soft spot for me. "I thought you were excited to work on the forges?"

I sigh, Percy's words are not enough to distract me. "If I had a family, I'd choose them over camp too," I hold his hand and squeeze it. "Have a good year, Nemo."

He shakes my hand. "Have a fun year, Birdy. Maybe you can come and spend Christmas with me and my mom?"

"You're giving me permission to annoy you outside camp?"

Percy grabs his glass of nectar and drinks from it. "Let's see who gets tired first."

Leo isn't as obnoxious as he pretends to be. He tells them about his connection to Hera, and the girl connects the dots. She doesn't want to use her empath touch on him, but she doesn't need to, Leo gets really quiet after telling his story and keeps his eyes ahead, no longer in the mood for jokes.

Ara process all the information she's gathered, to her it's obvious who the big bad is, but she does not dare to say it out loud, it would mean her future as the daughter of Olympus is bound to that stupid prophecy...

"You know something, don't you?" Piper asks as if reading Ara's thoughts. 

Leo has fallen asleep in front of them so she speaks quietly, though she doesn't need to, the wind is loud enough to hide her voice. "Nothing that could make things better."

"Okay... I just want to say, you know... thank you," Piper squeezes her shoulder. "You must be dead worried about your brother..."

Ara senses dread in Piper, the girl isn't as calm as she appears to be. "He would've wanted me to come. Others are looking for him, so..." She isn't needed. At least here, she feels important. She's a protector, and she likes that these demigods respect her. "And Lily's looking after camp, so I'm not worried."

"Annabeth's sister?" Piper muses. "Is she another daughter of Olympus?"

"Something better," Ara smiles. "She's my best friend."

Lily Saggio is the newest and weirdest camper in this place. She's got pitch-black hair and big gray eyes. Since I came back from Percy's home, I've seen campers give her weary looks when she walks past, they say she's just like Thalia.

"Hi! I'm Ara!"

The girl regards me with distrust, then she glances at the table I was in. I feel like she ran a background check in less than five seconds. "Lily Saggio."

I'll have to carry the conversation. That's okay. "You're lucky you got here during winter and not summer! Where are you from?"

Lily stares at me pondering whether to talk or ignore me. "You're a year-rounder?"

"Yeah!"

"Why weren't you here last week?" I notice she's trying to hide an accent, but I do my best to act like I don't.

"I was invited to my friend's house. Look, he gave me this!" I show her my backpack, which is a teddy bear. I keep priceless things in it: my snacks and the legos Sally gave me as a Christmas/late birthday present. 

"You can leave this place?" Lily's expression shifts.

"Not all the time," I pull Bear and rummage through him. "I promised I wouldn't leave Percy's apartment—and it was Christmas!"

Lily stands up straighter, looking defiant. "I can look after myself, I've fought monsters before," She pulls out a black dagger and shows it to me.

I gasp. "Where did you get that?"

"It showed up on my nightstand after my Nonna..." She pauses and shakes her head. "It's a gift from my patron, so I don't—"

"You don't like it here?" I pull out my box of Legos and Lily's eyes brighten at the sight. "Don't you wanna know who your parent is?"

She frowns. "I know who my dad is."

"Oh! You're an Ares kid? You don't look like Apollo but you'd make an interesting child of Hermes or Dionys—"

"I didn't mean that."

"You know your dad?" I ask, not following the conversation.

"Yes, my mortal parent," she rolls her eyes. "I don't care about the god. They didn't care about me."

To think that way will get her a step closer to joining Luke. I don't want that. "Do I look like I'm Aphrodite's child?"

"What?"

"Do I look it?" I insist.

"You're okay."

This is the first time anyone calls me okay. My brain goes: Well... duh!

"It hardly matters who your godly parent is, you'll grow to love it here," I lock arms with her and place my Legos on her hands. "I'm going to the forges, come and see."

"I don't need a chaperone—"

"You are sooo grumpy," I sigh. "No one would trust me to look after another camper. So!"

Lily waits for me to finish my sentence. "So?"

"They'll leave you alone if I'm with you, I'm not very popular either."

On our way to the forges, I hear a couple of Ares kids shout rude things at Lily, I step in to shut them up and they laugh so hard they forget about her.

"Go away," Lily scowls at me.

I pout a little. "I just wanted to help."

"I don't need you."

"I didn't do that thinking you—"

"I don't care," she clenches her fists. "Never do that again."

When they reach Boreas's palace, two of his children stop them. Zethes stares at the purple cloak covering her shoulders and his smile evaporates. "Ara Jackson."

She gives a start. "Hi. You know my name?"

"You killed Cacus!"

"Who?" Leo asks with amusement.

"It wasn't only me," Ara dismisses the comment. "Can we go in, then?"

Zethes doesn't look pleased. "You'll kill us if we don't let you?"

Ara shrugs. "Sure."

Leo leans closer as they fly down. "So if I get into a nasty fight, could you just smite my opponent? It'd be super helpful if I knew that beforehand..."

"Shut up," Ara scowls, but she's hiding a smile.

When they land, the Boreads get a little nervous about having Festus there. "No, no, no,"  Zethes points at it. "The dragon must be deactivated. We can't have fire in here. The heat ruins my hair."

Ara steps forward. "Stay away from the dragon, then."

"'S'okay, boy," Leo eases the automaton, giving her a reassuring nod. "The dragon's a little touchy about the whole deactivation concept. But I've got a better solution." 

"Destroy?" Cal suggested.

"No, man. You gotta stop with the destroy talk. Just wait."

"Leo," Piper intervenes, "what are you—"

"Watch and learn, beauty queen. When I was repairing Festus last night, I found all kinds of buttons. Some, you do not want to know what they do. But others... Ah, here we go."

Leo sneaks his hand inside Festus's left paw and Ara hears a click, the dragon folds until it's a block of bronze. "Um... yeah. Hold on. I think—aha!" A handle pops up along with four wheels at the bottom. "Ta-da! The world's heaviest carry-on bag!"

"Cool!" Ara gets closer to examine it. Every time Leo gets that reaction out of her, he looks ready to throw himself off a rooftop.

"That's impossible," Jason exclaims. "Something that big couldn't—"

"Stop!" Zethes and his brother suddenly point their swords at Leo.

"Hey!" Ara makes her own weapon appear. "What's your problem?"

Leo raises his hands. "Okay... what'd I do? Stay calm, guys. If it bothers you that much, I don't have to take the dragon as carry-on—"

"Who are you? A child of the South Wind, spying on us?"

"What? No! Son of Hephaestus. Friendly blacksmith, no harm to anyone!"

"Smell fire," Cal gets closer. "Fire is bad."

"Oh. Yeah, well... my clothes are kind of singed, and I've been working with oil, and—"

"No!" Zethes tries to touch Leo but Ara keeps him away with her sword. "We can smell fire, demigod. We assumed it was from the creaky dragon, but now the dragon is a suitcase. And I still smell fire... on you." 

Ara glances at Leo. He is hiding something. "Hey... look... I don't know—Guys, a little help?"

"Look, there's been a mistake. Leo isn't a fire guy. Tell them, Leo. Tell them you're not a fire guy," Jason says, which is not great.

"Um..." Leo's indecision makes Ara uneasy.

"Piper," she could do this, but it's better for her sister to get comfortable with her powers. "Talk some sense into these boys, please?"

The girl understands right away. "Zethes? We're all friends here. Put down your swords and let's talk."

"The girl is pretty," he hums, "and of course she cannot help being attracted to my amazingness; but sadly, I cannot romance her at this time." 

"Destroy him now?"

"Sadly, I think—"

"No," Jason insists. "Leo's just a son of Hephaestus. He's no threat. Piper here is a daughter of Aphrodite. I'm the son of Zeus. We're on a peaceful..."

"What did you say?" Zethes snaps. "You are the son of Zeus?"

"Um... yeah," he pauses. "That's a good thing, right? My name is Jason."

"Can't be Jason," Cal says stupidly. "Doesn't look the same."

"No, he is not our Jason. Our Jason was more stylish. Not as much as me—but stylish. Besides, our Jason died millennia ago."

"Wait," the boy continues. "Your Jason... you mean the original Jason? The Golden Fleece guy?"

"Of course! We were his crewmates aboard his ship, the Argo, in the old times, when we were mortal demigods. Then we accepted immortality to serve our father, so I could look this good for all time, and my silly brother could enjoy pizza and hockey."

So many demigods gave up their mortality, and most of them had done it for such stupid reasons! Ara can't believe Percy's the exception to the rule, she's seen him push a pull door way too many times.

"Hockey!" Cal says happily.

"But Jason—our Jason—he died a mortal death. You can't be him."

"I'm not."

"So, destroy?"

"No," Zethes pouts. "If he is a son of Zeus, he could be the one we've been watching for. He's with Jackson, after all."

"Watching for?" Leo repeats. "You mean like in a good way: you'll shower him with fabulous prizes? Or watching for like in a bad way: he's in trouble?"

"That depends on my father's will," a girl's voice announces.

A brief flash of light comes out of Leo as soon as he sees the girl, but it's so short-lived Ara doesn't even distinguish its color. She scowls at him. Really? Right now? But she doesn't say anything out loud, she's the only one who can see those things anyway. 

The goddess is asking Jason to join her father, apparently, he's got some judgment to make, but Leo is not allowed to come. Jason and Piper don't want to leave him, and Ara doesn't want to either, she doesn't trust Leo will stay put. 

He smiles and obediently sits on top of Festus. "It's fine, guys. No sense causing trouble if we don't have to. You go ahead."

Again, Ara's intrigued. Half the time he's hyper and impatient and now he's just... half a smile that does not reach his eyes. She's never met anyone like him, someone made out of halves.

"Listen to your friend," the young goddess tells them. "Leo Valdez will be perfectly safe. I wish I could say the same for you. Now come, King Boreas is waiting." 

Ara wants to sit and have a full-fledged conversation with Leo about his feelings and how he perceives the world, but she's lost practice. Before it was easy to pay attention to others, but Ara's obligations positioned her above many things, including day-to-day interaction with campers.

Lily's impression of me changes after Capture the Flag."This is your first time playing so don't worry, they won't notice you," I undo the clasp of her armor vest before she can stop me and fix it for her.

"What do you mean?" She frowns.

"You're new, they won't ask you to do anything."

She's deeply upset about this. "They should take advantage of all their assets!"

"We're not tools," I tilt my head with amusement. Lily's lived on the streets for far too long. "If you're so sure you can handle it, though... there's something I've always wanted to try."

She wavers. "What is it?"

"I think I can reach the flag faster than our leader. No one ever pays attention to me and it'd be really funny if we get there first instead of our Captain. What do you say?"

Lily makes a face. "That's not a plan."

"Are you a chicken, Saggio?" I don't know why I tease her, but she looks funny when she's angry.

"No!"

"A drachma says I can get to the flag before you can!" I sprint out of sight.

I hear her trying to catch up and that makes me giggle. I move as quickly as possible, but then, just when I'm reaching the limits, Lily comes out of nowhere and tackles me to the ground. We're both lifted in the air and end up hanging upside down from a tree.

"Why did you do that?" I complain. "We could've won!"

"I wasn't letting you get there first, you turned it into a competition!" She says. "What is this?"

"Rope. Beckendorf did it, so we're stuck here until someone finds us. Or so he says..."

"What do you mean?"

"These are designed for heavier demigods," I look up—down, actually—and follow the rope to see where it ends."I'll take your knife, the rope's tied in my direction."

"Turn us around!"

"Are any of your arms free?"

She groans, trying to release herself. "It's my knife!"

"You're bossy," I sigh. "Sit tight while I free us, boss."

I squirm for five whole minutes, but the rope's only getting tighter. Lily tries to stop me, but I'm not giving up. Finally, after a long struggle... Lily's dagger falls out of her belt. 

She lets her head hang in defeat. "I'll scream."

"No!"

"Why not?" She presses. "There's nothing we can do!"

I was telling the truth when I said this was something I'd been planning to do for quite a while, but this is not how I wanted it to go. "We can't be seen like this, your rep will be ruined!"

Two arrows fly through the gap between us, one of them scratches us but we're released in less than a second. Lily lands sideways and I land on my back. 

"Well, well..." a small boy walks up to us smirking. "Out of all the campers, I never thought they'd send you."

I smile sweetly. "Hey, bud, if you can find it in your heart to let us go..."

He seizes two new arrows from his quiver and points them at us. "Get up."

Lily sits up, immensely disappointed... so I start talking. 

"Michael," I charmspeak him. "Hand me your bow." His shoulders relax and the arrows fall at his feet, then he gives me his bow.

"Che cosa..!" Lily whispers in shock.

"The quiver too," Michael hands it to me. I look at it, then at him. "Forget this happened and go to sleep." He drops to the ground, snoring loudly. "So..." I hand Lily the bow. "He caught me, you knocked him out and took his weapons before he could take me. Fair play."

The more agitated she gets, the more it stands out that accent she has. "Have you always been able to do that?"

"You were going to lose, and now you're going back with a prisoner. They'll give you a bigger role next time thanks to that."

"But I didn't do this!"

"So what?" I shrug. "Next time you'll do something better, that'll be enough to compensate for the lie. There is no honor in going down by charmspeak, Lily. You're tough and Michael's got a bad temper, it'll make both of you look good."

"But I'm..." I can't tell if she's angry or flustered. "I was stubborn, I don't deserve a win."

"I was pushing your buttons," I admit. "Please, Michael will prefer this over the truth."

Lily's not convinced. "And you?"

"Teach me to be quiet and we'll be even," I pick up her dagger.

"I wouldn't want you as my enemy," she seizes her weapon and places it on her belt. The gash Michael made on our wrists is bleeding, hers is on the left wrist and mine's on the right. "It's a deal."

Next Chapter ->

Taglist.

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[agirlwithglam]

Hey, Vanilla!💕

I'm having a problem at school. I'm already in the final stretch of this school year and I have a bit of an idea what's going on. There was this guy in my class I was with for almost a month, and it was really intense, my feelings for him. Everything seemed perfect between us, but after a few weeks, he just seemed to want to run away from me. He'd say he liked me, but then say the problem was him, and it was clear he had emotional baggage. I tried talking to him about it, but it seemed like he didn't want to fix things; he always dodged me.

I could tell you many other things that happened, but I don't want to drag it out. Okay, so we drifted apart, but I always held onto the hope he'd come back and we'd work things out (I feel silly now for thinking that back then). Then, one day, he just showed up, dating another girl (found out through a friend). I felt uneasy when I heard, like I'd been used, just another conquest for him. But, even upset, I moved on.

But then on Monday, he started attending classes again (he rarely went due to work). I can't stand his presence; being around him makes me anxious, to the point my hands shake like I'm freezing all day. Honestly, all I feel when he's near is disgust. My friend gets mad at him because she knows what he did and how he still checks me out when I'm distracted (she keeps me posted). I try to ignore it, but can't focus on my tasks.

I've only shared this with one friend because I feel like she understands me best. I'm telling you this because I want to know how to deal with this situation. Transferring schools isn't an option since I'm almost done with the year, as I mentioned earlier, and switching classrooms isn't possible either (I spend the whole afternoon in the same classroom 😭 because, in Latin America, we don't have different classrooms and materials for each subject).

I don't want to talk to him because being near him makes me nauseous, and I've already tried that when we were closer. The worst part is how calm he seems, like he's unaffected; it makes me angry, and I feel like crying – I can't explain it. Please, help me out Vanilla 😓

(Sorry for my bad English 🥹)

hi princess 💓

ok first of all, i need you to realise and understand that you deserve better. you understand? this boy obviously has some problems which are HIS. its not your job to help or save him okay? especially if he's treating you like this.

also honey, cry. just let it out. let yourself get super upset and tear up papers. embrace this part of being a girl.

and also, distract yourself. i know he's in your class and it feels like he's just in your face, as if trying to flaunt the fact that "he doesn't care", but guess what? it's none of your business! whether he cares or not, ITS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.

what you need to do is put your head down and focus on your own life. your friends, family, health, mindset, grades, career, future, YOURSELF. okay?

also one more thing, heal. maybe theres a part of you that relates or something which makes you feel so angry and emotionally intense around him. idk, im not a therapist or psychiatrist or anything but it might help to speak to a professional or search something up on a trustworthy website.

also off topic but your english? its so good i felt like i was reading a literal story/ book.

i apologise it isnt a lot to go on but i figured that it would be better for me to at least give you something bc if i left it in my drafts im afraid i may not get to it in a whiiiiiiiile.

xoxo, vanilla <3 keep shining!

[mysteriawrites]

hi 🗣️ may i please request a bg3 matchup?? (i'm p sure i've done matchups for you in the past on my sideblog @frostfall-matches - i'd be happy to make this an exchange if you want!! 💪 you may ignore the fact that my requests are listed as closed lol)

raven / 20s / any pronouns / slight preference for male match but gals are fine too.

personality traits (and notes): introverted (distant, disinterested in getting close to many people, does not get lonely), extremely independent (often refuses to rely on others, hates when people step in to help without me asking for help), confident (arrogant, a bit prideful), straightforward (blunt, sometimes tactless), even-tempered (somewhat apathetic, rarely has strong emotional reactions, but is baseline content almost always), good sense of humor, playful, teasing, mischievous, realist that leans optimistic, curious (nosey, loves gossip), a bit of a troublemaker/rulebreaker, does not shy away from conflict (a bit combative with authority and people who don’t know what they’re doing), not sentimental, does not hold onto regrets, good at self-reflection, cold and a little mean when upset with someone.

hobbies: drawing (digital), painting (watercolor, acrylic), baking, cosplay, reading, taking care of plants, thrill-seeking activities, traveling.

likes: cats, sweets, good food, lattes, aromatic candles, cool weather, traveling, piercings, tattoos, puns (!), lazy days, learning foreign languages, cleaning, new experiences, people with a good sense of humor (quite subjective), when people banter back with me, people who develop their own opinions but are still willing to listen to other perspectives.

dislikes: bitter foods, strong scents, pessimism, hot weather, feeling restricted, possessiveness, conformity, having to be responsible for others, when people don’t stand up for themselves, overly anxious people, people-pleasers, when people act condescending towards me, people who try to force conversation with me.

types: intj-a ; 7w8 ; love languages: physical touch, quality time.

misc.: clumsy ; accidentally misuses slang or phrases bc i can never remember how they go ; able to pick up new skills relatively quickly ; studied french, korean, and latin in uni (also studied abroad) ; majors in international cultures/languages + minors in psychology and medieval history ; prone to being a bit directionless in life ; prone to bad luck but tries to find the humor in most situations ; life approach: to live a life of varied experiences, to not take life too seriously, to not dwell too much on the past.

physical description: 155cm, green eyes, round youthful face, curvy, dimple on one cheek, pale skin (sunburns so easily...), 5 piercings in one ear, 4+an industrial in the other, navel piercing. changes hair color/style/length frequently but it's currently mid back length and toned silver, almost always has straight bangs, hair is wavy.

in bg3 persona: wood elf ; main class ranger (gloomstalker) w/ rogue-like tendencies ; the child of merchant parents and did a lot of traveling with them when she was young but has decided to explore and adventure by herself in adulthood ; not really the academic type but is pretty book smart and willing to learn new things ; equal parts strategic and careless, depending on the situation.

Omg hi and thx for the request! Sure I’d love to turn this into a trade and thank you for all the matchups you’ve done for me in the past!

Astarion!!!

Lowkey this was an easy decision. I feel like you couldn’t be a better match for anyone else, but him. You guys have similar personalities with just enough differences to bring the necessary variety to the relationship.

I feel like you guys would definitely bump heads when first meeting due to similar traits (prideful, apathetic, loner), but once you both begin to care more for your party members including each other than sparks start to fly!

You get close very quickly because it’s so easy to banter and bounce off each other.

At first he finds you optimistic and care free nature a bit annoying at first, but then begins to find is refreshing when times are bleak.

I feel like when Astarion’s trying to seduce you for your own goals and you aren’t falling for it, it’ll be the classic troupe of where person A gets every person to swoon over them except person B which makes them want person B even more.

However when he actually starts falling for you he does get nervous and start to back off a bit, but oh no you’re not letting him get away from you that easily.

Due to your knowledge in psychology you’re able to notice his self destructive behaviors and talk him out of it, but ultimately let him take the lead in figuring out what he wants in life.

Also because of your blunt nature you’re able to deliver the hard truths that he needs to hear without sugur coating things.

Even after your mindflayer worm adventures, you two continue to adventure for awhile. Sharing lots if experiences and fun on the road.

If you get yourself into a tough altercation with some people on the road, Astarion’s charisma helps defuse the situation.

Astarion is still working on his trauma so you’ll have to work up to physical touch with him, but once you do he really likes being held and playing with your hair. He also likes to trace your tattoos.

Astarion is also an introvert so he understands how you need to have alone time as much as he himself does. Although sometimes you guys will be in the same room doing your own things and count it as quality time. (Yknow like comfortable silence)

When you’re having a chill day on the road or once your adventuring days are over, you guys have lazy days together. You’ll cuddle and he’ll read to you. You guys may get a bit intimate but don’t necessarily have sex (not saying it never happens though).

You guys exchange elvish traditions (or what astarion can remember of them) and talk about the history of faerun together.

He gets you a lot of souvenirs on the road usually different snacks and foods for you to try with the occasional scented candle or new set of paints. He even gets you seeds of the local plant life for you to grow.

You guys would get a cat. So many people say astarion is a cat person and I whole heartedly agree.

He (loves) hates your puns. He cringes so hard every time you make one (but he finds your smug face very adorable).

Yknow that popular headcanon about how Astarion’s lover would paint a picture of him so he can finally see what he looks like. Well if you would do that as like a birthday or anniversary present and man would full on cry from happiness at the gesture.

He just loves you so much and is so grateful to finally have someone in his life to bring him joy again.

Sorry id this kind of sucks im writing this early in the morning cause I was inspired.

Runners Up: Lae’zel, Karlach

[shmowder]

Woke up and am headed to work still thinking about it.

Also Aglaya in a nightgown I am WEAK 🖤

Makes me wonder, though, what type of partner do you think would be a good match for some of the other characters? Specifically Katerina, Yulia, Peter, and Grief?

🐿️ anon

Aglaya in a nightgown lives rent-free in my head, the idea alone gets my face hot and knees weak this mental image is too powerful.

I think realistically, she'd prefer a classic silk nightgown, black and sleek. Very little to no lace at all, something of a vintage cut to fit the time period of the game. The nightgown would be on the longer side, very airy, and doesn't hug the body.

But MY HEART desires something a little more risqué, you could say. I want her in a short nightgown with lace and small ruffles, still black, bc it is her iconic colour. A definite modern design Purely self indulgent bc I am a simp.

Or maybe a flowy dramatic nightgown? the firrly kind that comes with a feathery rope.

And hmm do yoh mean like in a ship or a good match logistically? Like how Lara starts a shelter and mirrors Alexander Saburov in a lot of virtues and traits?

If it's the first one, I ship everything but nothing in particular? The only ships I'm passionate about are Aglaya and Artemy's doomed roomance, sometimes Burakhovsky too.

If it's the latter and I get to play match maker in order to create the most efficient couple who would help each other in reaching their goals rather than based on love, they'd be:

Katerina and Maria

Listen, Katerina wants to be a mistress desperately, and the pressure of the responsibility is leading her downhill.

If we simply marry her off to a capital M Misteress, then there is no pressure for her to prefrom bc her wife would've already taken care of it.

Katerina can live a happy life and not worry about being infertile since her and Maria would'nt have had children of their own either way. They can happily adopt.

You might ask, what's in it for Maria?

How about landing the final hit to the declining powerhouse Saburov and completely ereasing it from the board? better yet, she stole the queen to her side of the chessboard.

Would they love each other? hmm unlikely. But I don't think they'd care. Maria loved the bachelor but she still married younger Vlad just to rule the town afterwards. Alexander loved Katerina more than life itself but it wasn't enough to get her out of her mental breakdown. These two women do not care for love as much as they care for results, so they balance each other.

Yulia and her roommate

Eva is a BAD TIME for her. Yulia might be hopelessly smitten with her golden locks, innocent fawn eyes and romantic view on life, but it will never work. Especially with Yulia's fatalistic views and tendency to relay on logic.

Eva wants to preform in life and Yulia wants to remain an observer which is why they would clash. Eva wants to find her purpose and Yulia believes life is inherently purposeless. They would hurt each other no matter how much they love one another. Eva might get over it afterwards but that breakup would shatter Yulia's fragile nerves.

That's why I think her engineer roommate in P2 is the best option. Someone who can stand her enough to live together is definitely someone who would be perfect for her. That roommate probably saw her through the lowest of her moments and helped her get back up. It's a best friends to lovers situation.

But if I had to pick a prominent character, I'd go with Aglaya or Peter. Sadly I don't see Aglaya having much interest in Yulia, she might bore her tbh. It's a one sided attraction on Yulia's side.

For Peter, they would make each other so much worse. Wallowing in their melancholy and being emo in general. Peter would ask her to snuff cigarettes out on his neck and Yulia would oblige.

There is always Yulia and Dankovsky? They mirror each other, they have so many things in common such as philosophy and latin. They also would annoy the shit out of each other by being so obnoxious all the goddamn time.

Good. Let them save the rest of the world from each other.

But ah, Yulia is strongly implied to be a butch lesbian isn't she? She'd probably pass on all the men.

Peter and....?

What besides his twin? lmao okay no no. I think Anna Angel. Maybe he has a crush? They are friends in canon and let's be fr for a second who would befriend Peter Stamatin out of free will? Anna would.

They could work together? Bpd queen and Depression king. She is a singer and an acrobat, he is a painter and an architect. They both value art but not in the same obnoxious way art consumers do, rather in the messy way artists do. How people who make art can appreciate it's ugliness and the struggle in a way that the people who merely look at art can never.

We're just hitting two birds with one rock by putting their dolls together. Anna solves her fear of being found out since Peter and Andrey would protest her if it happens. Like they killed people for less before.

And Peter now has someone who sings around, didn't he enjoy how Grace sang lullabies to his paintings? He likes music and it might inspire him to make art again.

There will be love but I wouldn't call it romantic.

Bad Grief and ARTEMY

FUCK YEAH MY SHIP MY SHIP!

They used to be best friends! While Lara and Rubin abandoned Grief thinking he truly turned to the bad side, Artemy still saw good in him when he came back. They were kids running in grass fields together and climbing trees.

Grief is the first person to help you when you arrive, you get a stash of goodies from his cupboard during the first day. He immediately gives you a job and still rewards you whether you fail or succeed. He clearly has a soft spot for Artemy.

Also he is a simp, like clear as day. There are so many lines when he is being embarrassingly down bad. Calling Artemy's hands precious surgeon hands that should be protected, saying it's no problem if Artemy killed his men, it's their fault for messing with him in the first place.

But would they work together? would they bring out the best for each other and solve each other's problems?

HA. No.

So I propose, drum roll please!.....Grief and Victor Kain.

Clocksmiths? More like COCKSMITHS.

Grief freshly had his mind broken by Aglaya, Victor had his mind broken years ago by Aglaya's sister, Nina. They both like tinkering with clocks.

Grief questions his reality a lot, Victor questions the flow of time a lot. Victor holds enough statues in town to redeem Grief in the eyes of the people, Grief holds enough experience as a gang leader and a necessary evil to balance the scales in town. He lets his gang get away with crime as long as its petty and no one gets killed. He knows a gang will exist with or without him so he'd rather be in charge to make sure to minimise the costs.

And it is surprisingly noble and thoughtful of him. Victor must really appreciate that.

will there be love? eh...maybe? not really. But there will be mutual respect and admiration above all.

-

Anyway what are your thoughts? I don't feel strongly on any of these pairings tbh. I don't ship them I'm just throwing stuff on the wall and seeing what sticks.

[misssakuramochi]

hello! 🗣️ i'm wondering if i could get a matchup for baldur's gate?? slight preference for men but ladies are ok too!

personality traits (and notes): introverted (distant, disinterested, little interest in getting close to many people, does not get lonely), extremely independent (often refuses to rely on others, hates when people step in to help without me asking for help), confident (arrogant, a bit prideful), straightforward (blunt, sometimes tactless), even-tempered (somewhat apathetic, rarely has strong emotional reactions, but is baseline content almost always), good sense of humor, playful, teasing, mischievous, realist that leans optimistic, curious (nosey, loves gossip), a bit of a troublemaker/rulebreaker, does not shy away from conflict (a bit combative with authority and people who don’t know what they’re doing), not sentimental, does not hold onto regrets, good at self-reflection, cold and a little mean when upset with someone.

hobbies: drawing, painting (watercolor, acrylic), baking, cosplay, reading, taking care of plants, thrill-seeking activities.

likes: cats, sweets, good food, lattes, aromatic candles, cool weather, traveling, piercings, tattoos, puns (!), lazy days, learning foreign languages, cleaning, new experiences, people with a good sense of humor (quite subjective), when people banter back with me, people who let me tease them, people who develop their own opinions but are still willing to listen to other perspectives.

dislikes: bitter foods, strong scents, pessimism, hot weather, feeling restricted, possessiveness, conformity, having to be responsible for others, when people don’t stand up for themselves (i tend to look down on/clash with people who are overly insecure), overly anxious people, people-pleasers, when people act condescending towards me, people who try to force conversation with me.

types: intj-a ; 7w8 (yes i know type 7 is super uncommon for intj) ; love languages: physical touch, quality time.

misc.: clumsy ; accidentally misuses slang or phrases bc i can never remember how they go (e.g. “bust this popsicle stand” instead of “blow this popsicle stand”) ; able to pick up new skills relatively quickly ; studied french, korean, and latin in uni (also studied abroad in korea) ; majors in international cultures/languages + minors in psychology and medieval history ; prone to being a bit directionless in life ; prone to bad luck but tries to find the humor in most situations ; life approach: to live a life of varied experiences, to not take life too seriously, to not dwell too much on the past.

I match you with...

HALSIN

○ Halsin values honesty and while you can be a little too straightforward sometimes, he appreciates that you don't make him guess what you're thinking. He's not whatsoever easily offended so most of your remarks wash right off of his shoulders or even make him laugh. He doesn't mind that you come across as a little cold - he knows a good person when he meets one. That being said, he's not spineless and isn't afraid to tell you if you've gone too far.

○ You balance one another emotionally. Halsin is a very passionate man, and you are much less prone to strong emotional reactions. You help keep him regulated and he helps you find purpose and direction.

○ Physical touch is an important thing for both of you. Halsin isn't uncomfortably touchy, but a calm hand on the small of your back or lithe fingers in his hair give reassurance and comfort even in the most stressful of times. Most times he's got a hand on your shoulder or fingers wrapped in yours. You both feel safer, stronger, when you can feel the other there.

○ Halsin is mature. He's seen many things and he's accepting. You want, it seems, someone open-minded and listens even when they may believe something different. Halsin is your guy. He loves to have deep talks with you about worldview and your own open-mindedness gives him new perspective he loves to chew on.

HEADCANONS

○ Halsin loves to tease, so banter is common. He especially loves it when his adrenaline is high and his focus is on you. This means that the two of you find yourselves flirting on the battlefield quite often. It makes fighting almost fun, sort of a competition between the two of you.

○ Halsin adores your clumsy side. You're usually sp confident and powerful in his eyes that he can't help bit he endeared when you trip over yourself. He's not the type to run to your rescue because he knows you don't need a knight in shining armor, but when things are too much he's always got your back.

○ Once all is said and done I can see the two of you traveling the world together. You would learn about all the different cultures along the way, and Halsin would explore the natural world. Both of you are always earning and growing together

○ Halsin is a frequent subject of your painting. He insists on posing for each canvas you coat for him and takes increasingly ridiculous poses to make you laugh.

--

Hello!!! I hope you enjoy your match!! Thank you again for trading with me, I look forward to reading your half (though there's no rush!)