#i'm alive sort of
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sad: falling out of a hyperfixation
tragic: watching your beloved friends and mutuals fall out of the hyperfixation while you're still in it
#oughhhhhhh#this is about the dca fandom but also about every other strong fixation ive had over the years lol#i know it's normal and inevitable esp for less popular works or minor characters with little canon content#and there's nothing wrong with smaller communities of course those rock#but there’s just something special about getting into something at the same time as a lot of other people all at once#and existing in this chaotic fandom space that's just bursting with creativity and passion#i've been in fandom spaces for as long as some of you have been alive and i've only come across that sort of unbridled joy like#a handful of times at best#it's just a heartbreaking feeling to see real lightning in a jar fandoms like that wither away as people drift away#(understandably so!)#anyway don't mind me i'm just having thoughts#musing about fandoms past as well#that i too eventually moved on from but remember fondly even if im not active in anymore#also my music just aint hitting right so im just sitting in silence which makes me more Contemplative(tm)
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No because I really feel like Katsuki would be so good at loving on your hips. He'd dig his thumbs in a little and lick his lips. Pull you back against him and just marvel the curvature there.
#hi i'm sort of alive??#katsuki#katsuki bakugou#[ rambles ]#[ katsuki ]#katsuki bakugou x reader#bakugou#bakugou x reader
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brodinsons AU where they are both acting the entire time the plot occurs. They both know both sides of what is happening at all times.
#brodinsons trying to plan a way to preserve both of them and it just keeps getting more and more difficult#like Loki tells Thor his arm went blue in the fight and Thor is like. oh. we SHOULD leave. and Loki is like yea u distract i'll get everyon#Thor hand Loki having a mind link of some sort idk like Loki falls and that genuinely wasn't meant to happen but then the link doesn't die#Thor knows Loki is being tortured with Thanos and Loki knows Thor is stuck on Asgard#Loki tells Thor to be Odin's favourite until the man dies and Thor convinces Loki to 'just attack Earth then'#they act out the 2012 movie#Loki goes to prison and is like ugh just leave me here \(´O`)/#and Thor is like okay fine but only until father dies. BUT THEN THE ELVES ATTACK#they get out and pretend to be at odds#Loki dies#Loki wakes and is like hey im alive im going after Odin and Thor is like i'm a LITTLE BUSY FIGHTING FOR THE UNIVERSE!!!#and Loki is like mmmmmmm doing it now#Thor finally wins and is like whew im so exhausted........... loki? you there?#and Loki is like. well yes. im here. in Asgard. you should come back! Odin is gone btw#Thor: where did he... go...#Loki: aged care home#Thor: ........................................... *cackling*#Loki: :D#Thor: got em good
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do you consider your self made?
#my art#self portrait of sorts#been musing a lot on disability recently and how being relatively freshly unable to do Most Things has changed my perspective on things#for a long time growing up i was fixated on the idea of being An Impact On The World yknow? mainly the next Big Writer#(and that it would be sooo impressive that everyone would make my books bestsellers when i was only 12 because it was That Good)#and i mean. obviously that didnt work out as originally planned because i was 12 and learning. but I've felt a lot like#I've kind of built my sense of self on those big achievements. even if they were only big to me. and a lot of them#are now out of reach or very difficult to reach. and it's been a lot to. recontextualize#to take what ive been told my whole life and ignore it in favor of just being being enough.#things will happen as they happen. i havent earned anything by suffering but it hasnt ended the world either#im here doing what i Can do for as long as I'm able to do it. and thats all i need to be for now#just making sure that i Do do the things i can do rather than assume i can do them later#anyways. love you#cw:#top nudity#artistic nudity#the dreaded ambiguously presenting nipple#if you put any pro weight loss eating disorder shit on here ill kill you btw#my body is sexy because im in it and im still alive. not because its struggling to stay that way#lindwormposting
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*sits up covered in sticky notes* i'm alive again (kinda)!!! sorry for vanishing for a couple of days, the times when i usually post got surprisingly busy with people wanting to do stuff and work :] anyways soft moth in the snow because it is snowing here.
Foul Legacy squeaking and chittering delightedly whenever he sees snow outside, drifting down onto the harbor steps. it reminds him of home, of the icy tundra and snow drifts- Snezhnaya, not the Abyss. the Abyss was never home. it was only where he was born. one home was the nation of Cryo, and now, his home is wherever you are. he nudges you gently until you roll over to face him, staring at your sleepy self with a glittering crystalline eye, chirping quietly and urging you to get up, to rise and come have fun with him in the snow.
you have to search your little house for a set of clothes that are both warm and waterproof, Legacy bounding around and bumping his head against your shoulder impatiently. you playfully shake a finger at him as you fetch the matching scarves you made a few seasons ago, wrapping his around his neck and drawing a pleased croon from your beloved monstrous moth. alas, your own scarf gives him the perfect purchase to carefully bite, gently tugging you bit by bit out the door and into the frozen city streets.
of course, he can keep perfect balance, leaping over the ice and frost. you, not so much. so he carries you, wings fluttering and chest rumbling with a smug, satisfied purr. Foul Legacy drops you, gently, into a pile of snow the moment he reaches the wilderness, flopping down cheerfully beside you and rolling around in the soft powder.
you're taking the next few days off.
#genshin impact#childe#tartaglia#gi ajax#foul legacy#foul legacy childe#genshin tartagalia#genshin childe#genshin tartaglia#genshin x reader#childe x reader#oohohgfghohoh sorry about that i was so busy#i have a bunch of work to do as well as friends wanting to do things#and i had to make a tough decision for my own mental health#which i probably will be emotional about but i am endeavoring to not care anymore#anyways i SWEAR i'm alive. sort of#wifi's brainrot#short scenario#also sorry about all the ice/snow themed things lately i just love snow and we ACTUALLY got a dusting over here
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fairest of the fair
#hi! im alive and back and etc.#six the musical#six the musical fanart#katherine howard#thinking of that post going 'i think eventually you become the person you needed most' and like maybe that's the thing with my art#this started out as a redraw and <improvement meme> i think i've finally reached the stage where i'm making the things that my younger self#aspired to create. like i can do this now! i've reached That level of technical skill! tiny me would be so proud. it's very gratifying#redraw from august this year actually. i've made a surprising amount of improvement HAHA maybe it was the adamandi stuff getting me#back into digital rendering. i think that obsession has quietly slipped away but yknow. one never truly leaves a fandom. just less intensit#also speaking of old fandoms! we're back with the six stuff haha. as of writing i'm in the midst of blog revamp- figuring out how to chill#multifandom status doesn't mean ditch all the old stuff ! but i do feel much freer and less stressed. i think hiatus has been good for me#notes on this piece particularly: redraw about cutting hair and thinking of the lyric above. also lowkey &j ref + pinterest poem excerpts#of female suffering. and maybe a dash of amanda heng let's walk inspo. this work is really just full of contradictions..#1. the mirror and cutting hair as an act of self liberation 2. the & is part of the lyric but also a nod to &j (in another iteration it was#pink but the white looked better) and like. &j is really all !!! girl power!!! etc. and i was like hmmmm. also matching pink shiny aes#3. the frame as a cage; the mirror as a self reflection idea (ie. saville's propped insp) but also as a sign of vanity. 4. sparkly costume#and pretty pose- read one too many poems about women feeling like they have to be pretty even in their suffering. something i wanted to#explore. and also in 5. the show itself... all you wanna do is. despite all the dancing and pink and sparkly the content of the song is#darker. and even though it's a story of her suffering it's still presented as a shiny fun pop song and ajshdhfhfh ok... 6. the lyrics fall#outside the frame. sort of a caught inbetween. sort of a trapped in the narrative and yet#within the frame it's all. vaguely handwavy breaking free vibes. like i said contradictions?#7. cutting off the long ponytail vs the pull my hair lyric at the end. yeah#8. the blocked off & looks a bit like scissors. positioned to cut right at the neck#anyways yeah irl remains hectic! but if i get around to more doodles they'll appear here :)
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Been thinking a lot about Oda choosing Queen of Night as Law's image flower.
Like. Isn't that really important? In a story heavily featuring sun symbolism, MC with an image flower called Sun-facer, being assigned with "Beauty under Moonlight" is a dead giveaway that the author considers his role to be complimentary to the protagonist, an alternate source of light that takes its light from the sun.
A lot of Japanese fans think the last bit of vegapunk's message, "Those of you who are toyed by that fate, I hope this message reaches you" - was directed at Law's plot. There's no other D who is currently alive and interested in their "checkered fate" other than Law. Dawn and Dusk shared an interesting observation about Law's family being the only family of D's confirmed to originate from the opposite side of the red line (x). Then there's the hidden family name, and a five billion berry devil fruit ability. The groundwork has been laid out and none of these have been properly explained yet, there's no way Law wouldn't be important to the endgame plot.
#I'm still onboard my theory that Law's ancestors didn't belong to the ancient kingdom#but they embraced their will and passed it down in own bloodline - perhaps to fulfill some sort of duty#the knowledge is lost in law's generation but he's being 'guided' and 'kept alive'#it's all probably a red flag but let's stay hopeful#even though losing his hat was Hella ominous#BUT LET'S STAY HOPEFUL#one piece#one piece meta#1 am feels#it's not 1 am tho#trafalgar law#trafalgar d. water law#monkey d. luffy#mine
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(in which the caption is a picture)
bonus (my girlfriend):
#shrimp gifs#hongjoong#seonghwa#yeosang#mingi#wooyoung#san#ateez#kpop#LEGIT. WHAT'S. GOING ON. they're so stone-faced and/or almost wary of each other. no 'oh shit captain you're alive! hooray!'#just. hwa hopping down and tossing hj the duffel bag. and the look hj gives him looks almost pained? though i'm super bad at telling#emotions from faces so idk BUT LIKE. GOD#there was a fic that played with this a bit. like it had hj trapped in the house AS WELL AS a time loop or sorts and it took LONG for him t#get out so when the lads finally reunited with him they didn't trust him fully at first because Man What Happened To You#it was so good. i should find it again OTL
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little nanago / gonana ship chart! (Original template by goomyloid)
#nanago#nanami kento#satoru gojo#kento nanami#gojo satoru#jjk#howl draws#ummm hi i'm still alive#SORT OF.
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A threesome with Valeria and Alejandro would be so good. They'd have like the whole "nice dom/mean dom" thing going on, you know. Valeria's degrading and mean, yanking your hair and refusing to let you cum until she thinks you've earned it. All the while, Alejandro's praising you, telling you how well you're taking him, how pretty you look while they're using you.
#I've been thinking about this all day and now I'm home so it's everyone else's problem now#alejandro vargas x reader#valeria garza x reader#alejandro vargas x valeria garza#they'd make out over the top of you too. and maybe bicker about how to treat you.#you'd be lucky to make it out alive lol they're going to use you until they're done#sort of smut#codmw2#cod smut
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It was finally time for Shinsou and Monoma action in the anime, let's go! Also just Aizawa being Eraserdad to all of them kids.
#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#shinsou hitoshi#monoma neito#bnha#bnha shinso hitoshi#bnha shinsou#bnha monoma#aizawa shouta#eraserhead#bnha aizawa#bnha spoilers#mha spoilers#mha#Manga reader right here#Anyway I'm still alive#Or not so much#Pretty sure I'm getting sick again#I've been getting several bad headaches throughout the last few days#So I'm only sort of alive#Ninjago AU updates will still come#Eventually#byeeeee
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finished mother 3 for the first time last week so here's my take on a claus lives au
#thinking abt the irreversible damage done to claus' body and how much he must have suffered... :[#he's alive yes but many of his days are spent in discomfort...#only the pigmasks could give him the accommodations he needed to power through. but now he's without all of that. he has to live with it now#he's always freezing because of how much steel is in his body#that old jacket is the only thing that brings him any sort of warmth despite how much he hates it#this is a general hc but lucas went mute during the 3 years due to not really having anyone to talk to#it's also why he didn't learn much sign :')#i was in a lot of bodily pain the other day so of course i gave it to claus#mother#mother series#mother 3#mother 3 fanart#mother 3 art#mother 3 spoilers#lucas mother 3#claus mother 3#mother 3 au#kinda wanted to draw more of this before i posted it but whatever i've been rotating this game around in my brain for so long . i'm so ill
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I hate when I bring something up in history to show that injustice exists and the response is "that was so long ago and is irrelevant"
This isn't a study on something that can change over time. History can be updated with new findings and perspectives (best friends or gay) but if we both agree on what happened then you can't just act like it goes stale!
"That was over 50 years ago" so was WW2 but we have neonazis today. There are slurs today that are old as fuck. You think we're born and don't take anything from past human experiences? We just need to remake an entire culture from scratch every generation?
It's almost like the environment impacts human behavior and it can be taught to new generations. Wow, what a nifty part of being a social species.
#heads filled with concrete sort of dense#I'm thinking about at least two people#one of which dismisses events that they were fucking alive for#or well time periods#notaterftip#not sarcasm
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What if Yaz and Sammy are engaged in Chaos Theory!?
Like, I know them well enough to know they'd do anything to be with each other constantly. They love each other so so so much, and if that means getting married in their early 20's, then that's how it has to be!
Chaos theory will take place in 2022, which means Yaz will be 22 and Sammy will be 21, so I highly doubt they'll be married in ct. But I truly and highly believe they will be engaged.
Idk if the ones working on the show would let that happen, cuz they're not the "main main characters" and they're not "the main focus", but let's be real, it's YASAMMY we're talking about. The quirky lovely dovely couple that would propose to each other at the same time. They're not going to let some storyboard artists or show workers stop them from fianceeing eachother.
(lol, get it? They'd be fiancees and they're fianceeing eachoth- no, okay.)
But to summarize it all: I think, but mostly, I HOPE, Yaz and Sammy will be engaged in Chaos Theory.
Thank you.
#Sorry for my ramble. They're just the only thing i have in my head#I'm not complaining tho. They sort of completed my life. I wouldn't be the same without them#I love them SO MUCH. like. no words can describe my love for them#So if they are engaged in chaos theory then.. I just might be the happiest girl alive#jurassic world chaos theory#sammy gutierrez#yasmina fadoula#chaos theory#jwct#yasammy
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Augh
#fancy is really struggling#and the babies are lovely and just FASCINATING in how they developed around but not shaped by humans and i so very deeply enjoy them#but they are also a little ungovernable due to their age and general lack of caring about rules and they are bothersome and rowdy#and it is obviously so so hard on her and my heart is breaking because im afraid we wont be able to get her through this#and i will have to give the babies up#and...not have another cat#just one#i would be crushed#and added to all of that is that the babies are taking their time learning to be pets and that is fine and wonderful actually#but...i need surgery on at least one ankle and i won't be able to keep up with them if things haven't sorted themselves out by then#and they haven't become more manageable and fancy hasn't adjusted#so we are asking about meds for poor fancy and hoping that works#but she's really having a hard time guys and i am fighting so hard to cope in a household where i spend most of my time alone#with two animals who don't love me yet or interact with me like pets (i'm a source of three things: food and snuggles on demand and NO STOP#and one who is sad and not herself#and frankly it's terrible that i can't fix this#and i am trying not to lose my shit but this wasn't supposed to be so hard#and im afraid i may lose five cats and not three#and im already barely holding on#i don't know what to do and neither does my boyfriend#i don't want to turn around and have to tell you guys we can't keep the babies#i feel like i am failing at something i am supposed to be GOOD AT#i don't want to be in a house so empty#i can't live like that#having the babies is lovely#they're so alive and the boys were so sick by the end and the stress of the constant anxiety and grief as they faded away was crushing#even before they died#it's been so good to have them running about#i don't want to LOSE that#im so tired of LOSING things
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if evrart claire weren't fat and disabled (he has type 2 diabetes from growing up in poverty), a lot of people in the DE fandom would like him a lot more or at least not constantly come at him like he's some obviously greedy freak who MUST be just pretending to be a socialist for his own gain.
also the fact that people take harry's assessment of how much of an actual socialist he is as being correct is also very funny. harry "are women bourgeois?" du bois is not a reliable narrator on that one.
#text#lauren plays disco elysium#tbh i'm talking about the fandom as a whole because apparently tumblr is slightly less terrible about this reading of him#but on twitter it is alive and well and i think they suck at understanding him#idk like he sucks in many respects with his “you need to break a few eggs to make an omelette” sort of rhetoric but he's far from the worst
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