#i'll always support this man
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
In defense of late-canon x files (including the revivals)
I was thinking about this poll after I commented on it, and I kinda want to be brave and say more.
Short answer to the poll's question before I go any further: If you're a new fan and a sensitive sort who thinks you'll struggle with your blorbos Really Going Through It and you really need a happy ending, I suggest you stop at the end of season 8. Do not pass go, do not look at spoilers. Disregard this post entirely, close the internet, and go look at something that makes you happy. (Also fuck every part of society that characterizes sensitivity as inherently weak and bad and some kind of personal failing, you are valid.)
That said, "quality" as a concept is entirely subjective, and the question of whether or not there's a decline in quality for any story is wholly subjective, too. In the case of x files? I'm not convinced there is a decline. I am going to be upfront that I haven't yet watched past season 8, though I am almost completely spoiled on events after that - and the reason I haven't watched yet is not because of how I know events are going to unfold, but simply because I don't want it to end!!! Ohh, the tension between "I CAN'T WAIT!!!" and "Nooo don't be over D:"
When I first came to txf fandom on tumblr and gradually became spoiled about what happens in late canon though, I was often left uncomfortable and tbh kinda queasy about it. As I said in my comment on the poll, the hate for especially the revival and IWTB, or to a lesser extent even seasons 8 & 9, is very well documented. But! There are other takes to be found here on tumblr if you figure out where to look, and my feelings have changed!
The thing is, I have yet to find myself in any fandom where there isn't a vocal subset of fans who dislike the story after a certain point. I am not joking when I say that no one hates the things they love as passionately as sci-fi and fantasy fans. In my experience, it often hinges on the extent to which a viewer has strong notions on where they would like the characters to end up. In particular with series where shipping is a dominant component for the bulk of a fandom, I have almost universally found that there comes some turning point in the story where "let them be happy you cowards" is the dominant view, and things that compromise the attainment of a degree of romantic stability and/or domesticity are, to many fans, annoying at best and despicable at worst. But! As one tagset on the linked poll said:
and I think for any fandom, that last tag especially is so so so important. (I think that's harder for people watching a weekly series live, bc you have so much time to analyze and speculate and dream before the next breadcrumb drops, but I digress.)
So why am I saying this and how do I apply it to x files? Well, I eventually found that there are also a subset of fans who find redeeming things right up to the very end and actually quite like the whole thing! The things that I had seen people rage and ventpost so much about honestly never quite sounded to me as "out of character" or "untrue to the story" etc as those same ventposts made them sound. And I've discovered I'm not the only one who felt that way. Do I love that the spooky squad had to go through all of those things? No, those poor guys D: Life is hard and they have been through so much trauma. But do those events and their choices make sense to me in light of everything that came before? Yes! And I honestly can't wait to see them fight to overcome those things, breaking, healing, always learning, always growing, always getting better.
So if you're wondering "where does it go wrong"... well, I'm a completionist, as many people who've answered that post are, but also my personal opinion is that I don't think it does go wrong. If you're new and interested in exploring why I've gone from "vaguely queasy" to "excited" about the whole thing, or want to maybe balance out the impressions you're getting about the later seasons before deciding whether or not you want to see the whole thing, I'll put a few blog names in the comments.
Final admission: even once I started feeling a little more confident in the possibility that "actually ok maybe I'm not crazy, maybe this all kind of is in character and does make sense", there was one big plot point that I was NOT looking forward to and I thought I would never be comfortable about. In hindsight, I think my discomfort came from the negative responses being SO seemingly universal that I hadn't stopped to let myself truly consider other possible interpretations on that point. (I mean my initial instinct when I first read about it was, why are we mad about this?? CSM is literally the most unreliable narrator in history???? it's obviously fake news?????? this must be either a fever dream someone's having or it's a misdirection ploy against whatever shadowy forces might still be lurking?????????????? but for whatever reason I guess I had halfway written that off.) Happily, just last month there's a new post-s11 novel out, and although reviews for the book as a whole are mixed, it seems to have laid the groundwork for resolving that plot issue in a way I think most fans would be broadly happy with. If you're interested in being spoiled about that and seeing how, I recommend searching #perihelion on @agent-troi who liveblogged reading it with receipts, scroll back chronological-style to the first post on the subject and see how it unfolded. (And never forget that Dana Katherine Scully is the queen of denial as a coping mechanism lol)
Everyone's mileage will vary. Each person can feel however they want! But for anyone new, I wanted you to know that the very many ventposts you might be seeing are not all there is to this show or its fandom. Some of us love it despite - or even because of - all the things that went "wrong". I think we just don't talk about it as much.
#i don't talk about it much because tbh it can get *fraught*. and i've had that in other fandoms too.#i added and deleted so many qualifiers from this post over it lmao#people are passionate about fandom which is great! as a concept#but it sucks feeling like most people hate the thing you love or that - however diplomatically it's phrased - you should hate it too#or that folks think maybe you *would* be mad if you just looked at it a certain (sometimes seemingly cast as the 'correct') way#basically it's insane that half the time when i see people standing up and praising the revival i'm like 'damn bruh. you brave'#and feeling that way is partly a me thing. but i've seen posts that also lead me to believe it's not JUST a me thing yaknow?#i always wonder whether the 'vocal subset' in any given fandom who hate a thing are really the majority that they appear to be#or if they just appear to be the majority because they've needed to be vocal about it as a sort of internet support group thing lol#which fair enough i mean anyone's entitled to be disappointed or have feelings#for me? i don't think i can remember ever being mad about a series i liked#i'm just here for the vibes man i very rarely have fixed notions#i say to the writers: go ahead and surprise me. i'll make sense of pretty much anything they throw at me#i also think about a dd quote i saw ages ago that as an actor you (paraphrased): can't say 'the character would not do that'#...because if it's in the script then by definition they *did* do that. it's right there on the page.#and that's kind of me as a fan too.#p.s. i fucking love season 8 i love angst and holy shit it delivers. the new characters are fantastic the journey is *chef's kiss* and#yes i consider certain temperamental even assholeish behavior to also be *chef's kiss* there's so much trauma so much reason for it#it's be-yoo-ti-ful 💕 season 8 my beloved 😍#anyway watch it all watch none do what you want. just know that there are people who would cuddle the whole damn thing from start to finish#like a floppy wet lil raggedy ann doll if only they COULD#x files#the x files#txf revival#txf thoughts#i love you floppy wet raggedy ann doll
61 notes
·
View notes
Text
lays on the floor do you guys ever think about how in ResF Bulma falls for Vegeta's fake-out with Freeza and both she and Yamcha are worried about Vegeta's villain fake-out strategy in Champa and Beerus' mini tournament and how it's only been a couple of years since the Buu saga and how Vegeta straight up stopped using that strategy after that tournament
#i do#do you think he noticed it upset her twice in a row and was like 'oh I haven't earned the trust back yet i'll retire this strat'#'it's fun to scare people but i do not like my wife being scared we can put this one up on the shelf for emergencies only'#because like bulma can consciously trust him and I'm sure she does but one can still have The Fear if you've seen your spouse relapse befor#And he probably thinks it's very amusing but it is also almost certainly very not funny for her no matter how much she trusts him#and the next arc is Trunks and she's so worried about the way he left she ignored the PDA rules and squished him when she saw him alive#Because Geets determination can be self destructive when it comes to Bulma and Trunks and he killed himself to protect them once before#and knowing how connected they've been for so long some part of her probably Knew he would opt to stay behind and die like he was going to#And I love the idea that between those two events and all of the things Trunks tells him about Bulma during the GB arc Geets has to really#really be confronted with how loved he is -- and it's not that he wasn't aware before but knowing she even missed him at his worst#and loved him maybe even before she was pregnant -- means the cruel part of his mind can't make excuses for why she stayed with him#I also like to think that being confronted with the idea that Bulma is still scared for him getting his worst wires tripped#wouldn't be offensive to him. Knowing he's still got work to do if his wife is worried about those things happening to him again#is just proof that she loves him with his flaws and was still thinking about it and supporting his recovery when he didn't#even notice he was recovering -- which has always been true of her -- and now he has the chance to support her recovery in return#and being in a place where he can still put that work in to make her feel secure in his priorities is a privilege and a gift#and man I just really like how casually comfortably close they are in Super's manga I love them a lot they worked so hard#to make each other feel safe and secure for the past decade+ that it's Easy for them both now and they're SUCH a confident couple#and I am once again shaking the anime by the shoulders WHY didn't you give us that they are SO the team's Mom and Dad in the manga#until Goku riles Vegeta up -- then Piccolo is the team Dad. Bc Piccolo is the team Grandpa aksjda The Z-Fighter's locker room judge#dbtag#vegebul#putting the whole essay in the tags again oops#happy pride i am gay for a whole married couple
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
g*lmar rly has to be the best skajrim character on the real like even if you don't like him he just is . literally The best one i think......... on dat note i also imagine that he and ulfr*c despite being fairydust BFFs for lyfe genuinely have the worst communication skills ever seen
#text#but i already talked about how g*lmar is weird about ulfr*c anyways#literally jubilant and feeling special cus he's the only person ulfr*c actually trusts and speaks to outside of formal conversations#he's a very manly man too (like N*loth) for wanting to just control everything... well actually having ulfr*c under 'control' is enough 4 -#- him. unlike n*loth who wants to be above everything that moves. literally not about him tho#i hope that other st*rmcloaks develop a habit of going to hide downstairs in the palace whenever they can tell the vibe between -#- g*lmar and ulfr*c is off because they're gonna be yelling at each other and throwing shit around for 40 minutes in a few seconds#i don't believe they'd fight insanely often but being at an active war probably gets them heated more. Often than usual; and their -#- conflicts are never resolved. i feel like they just don't talk to each other for a good 2 days and act like nothing happened#they're way too manly and prideful to actually let the other one 'win' so they just don't say anything ever post-arguing#Tbhs g*lmar actually really likes that ulfr*c is so unstable and harrowed because it makes himself feel very good and reliable -#- but he has his limits 😂LMFAOO i bet sometimes he gets really tired of him being so traumatized. very rarely but he does think about it#i'll have to desribe that a bit better later tho... don't know how to word it atm#but maybe he wants to punch him or something BYE. no...... 💔savage as hell#he likes it in a very general sense of ulfr*c's personality especially between them but doesn't like it when it causes them to clash#this might just be mostly ulfr*c's doing cus i doubt he's actually talkative about his past issues and Troubles (torture mayhem) and -#- can't communicate anything about it or set boundaries when needed. he just gets mad or very avoidant. No fixing that tho#well it's just shameful to him so he'd rather do nothing than even admit anything to anyone Everrrrr#why does his life suck so bad LMFAOOOOOOOOO#their nasty musty mutualism .. leeching off your traumatized Bff so that he can make you feel good by saying he needs you in particular#while U pay him back with some support.......SOME#Oh well#that zero communication between some sk*rim characters looks yammy as fuck to me. A;lways. ALWAYS#nelvas is power dynamic induced...... g*lmar&&ulfr*c trauma-caused... elituli Um😂 t*llius doesn't even know any hobbies she has#bye this is why they're serving so hard
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
me, starting my "If Thistle Was At the Dungeon Lord Support Group Meeting" oneshot: i will write this as crack. it will have undertones of seriousness because they're talking about the lion, but i can keep it mostly funny
me, 2k of angsty character study later: fuck
#I ALWAYS DO THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!#there are still funny moments but i gave my mans like an entire mini ptsd breakdown onscreen whats wrong with me#anyway i thiiink i'll be able to post it tmrw. for thistle thursday again. i'm on a rollllll#aphelion.txt#thistle#dunmeshi#my writing#see it was going to work to publish this literally w the title If Thistle Was At the Dungeon Lord Support Meeting bc it would've been funny#but now im like. should i find a more serious title for this
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
One thing that I keep thinking about in regards to Tactics Ogre is the presence of the vaguely humanoid reptilian guys. Like the game has straight-up dragons of varying types, but then you've also got these guys that are just. guys but reptiles. And at first I was going "okay maybe they're just supposed to be mindless monsters like the undead?" but at some point in the game Canopus gets into a fistfight with one of them when he (Canopus) interrupts some singing. So this reptile guy has clearly got the emotional wherewithal to both listen to someone sing and also to get mad when someone interrupts!
The PSP version apparently has a description for the reptiles that mentions they're a "crude race with limited intellect." But are they REALLY limited in intellect or is it just racial prejudice?? You also see them being included in various mercenary bands throughout the game, and they seem to wear human clothing and armor, which implies that at least some of them have some idea of trade and currency, and most of them have the understanding of how to dress for their own protection. For all intents and purposes there is nothing that really stands out as evidence that they're less intelligent than standard humans
#tactics ogre#ogre battle series#I am constantly spinning all the unaligned enemies around in my head like a microwave#like they've gotta be from somewhere so WHY do they consider themselves unaligned to any place in Valeria#do they have land of their own that's unrecognized by the Valerian governing parties?#or are they just legally not allowed to be considered residents of any of the different nations??#and are the mermaid-looking ladies ALSO supposed to just have crude intellect? the one in potd floor 3 I'm p sure straight up spoke English#wait hey. hold on a second#is the auction/dismissal dialogue you get with dragons and the bird monsters supposed to imply they have human intellect#I die every time that comes up#the worst is always 'yeah no it's cool man I get it you just have to sell off your friends sometimes.'#'go ahead it's fine it's not even a big deal. don't worry about it. I'll support you no matter what. I love you. remember me when I'm gone'#like never mind you can just kill me actually!!!!!!!!
8 notes
·
View notes
Note
I’m sorry I think we need to move on a bit but I’m still just so sad I’ve never particularly cared for George but this week all I’ve been thinking about is “George told me if he were in that situation he’d kill himself” just that thought going in circles in my mind. He’ll be ok, he has people, but still :( wouldn’t wish those kinds of dooming thoughts on anyone
man anon i am in the exact same boat as you 😭 i've always loved all of dteam equally but dream was the only one i ever got parasocial demons about, but after this week and seeing how george looked so off in his response stream, and how nervous sapnap was in his stream- even just to do a british accent or make references to things he and george joke about- it's made me feel so ouughhh :(( for all three of them
as for the kms joke george made (lol 😭) my take on that is 1. dream was getting jumped by twitter for something where objectively, he did nothing wrong, because it was mostly the gumball shit. 2. if i had to guess, george made that joke mostly just to get dream to laugh, and while they were drinking and watching f1 so. i wouldn't put too much stock on it being his actual thoughts :]
#cq.asks#i get the stress over that joke i really do#but remember he has a strong support system outside of spineless ccs#and man my goal 3 days ago was to disconnect from this fandom but idk HOW TO DO THAT#also dont hesitate to send ur thoughts on anything if ur getting in ur own head <3#even if u want to dm or just send an ask u dont want me to post i'll always do my best to help u guys calm down
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
HAPPY BIRTHDAY @jann-the-bean!!!!!
you know i had to draw this lil precious baby again because my GOSH-!!! too adorable<333 (i believe she is capable of murder with how full of rage she is tho- gremlin behavior<;3333)
there's only so many ways i can say how much i adore your art and writings before i become a broken record because SERIOUSLY!!!! you are my biggest inspiration when it comes to writing and i swear if i hear you saying ANYTHING otherwise i'm breaking into your house no matter how far away you are cause i'm not tolerating such lies!!!! you are an AMAZING bean and i would hug you to death if i could >:'Dc <333
mocha belongs to jann
mobster au is both by @help-im-a-gay-fish and jann
#art#my art#gift#mobster au#mocha#mob!mocha#human!mocha#because seriously how can a human be so HUGGABLE#i wanna be her friend but she would be too cool for that</3#hhh xD okay okay but seriously if i catch you having a bad day- on your BDAY of all days!!- me and your brain's gonna have some problems-#my vocabulary is poor man idk how to tell you you're like. the most fantastic kind and supportive talented writer AND artist ever#without repeating myself!! you've heard all of these before but they're still TRUE!!! you're just!!! so COOL!!!#still remember the days before my blog and if i could describe what it felt like to be followed back by you it would be. insane#IT WAS CRAZY i was literally shaking!!! you absolute MASTERPIECE maker like name me ONE fic you made that you don't like-#and i'll cite all the things that make it a literal banger like don't try me!!!! i WILL bury you with love you menace to society!!!#i have so many fond memories of your past writings tho i think i'm just gonna re-read them once i finish my studying :')#just came back from school and i rushed to my computer to post this hhh >:'D please don't forget how much you mean to all of us!!!#amazing. you are AWESOME AND GREAT like always!!!!#happy bday mÖther- queen of angst and sweet precious boys >:'Dc <3333
35 notes
·
View notes
Note
I'M TOO MUCH OF A WIMP TO CALL LUNA ANY NICKNAMES
JUST START OFF WITH THINGS YOU CAN EASILY SLIP IN
This can just include common pet names (eg. honey, sugar, etc. etc.)
The easiest to be in sentences are in greetings or farewells (ex. "hi honey!," "bye sugar!," you get the drill)
So once you start building confidence, you can do the stupid nicknames I give to people carelessly (ex. "I love you my sugar honey orange pie lemon crust pookie cutie sweetheart")
#moony 🌕#No because no kid I have a stupid ass long list of pet names#I have most of them memorized but when I start realize I've been using a few over and over again I switch it up a small bit with a new name#Such as angel cupcake ykyk??#I'll be your dear righthand man 💪💯🔥🔥🔥#Always here to support you and help you in times of need#ANd I have the best advice frfr
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
/ ITS FINALLY HAPPENING FOLKS- c.onstantine is coming s o o n
#;ooc#ooc#HE'S COMINGGGGGGG WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 😭😭😭😭😭#if i recall correctly we are two years apart from the jp server#TWO YEARS..... BUT HE IS FINALLY COMING#IN ALL HIS STANDING MAN EMOJI GLORY-#i cant believe ill have him on my main account like#-cries in between my hands-#and im talking as if I'll get him BUT HEY! we gotta manifest 🙏#may everyone who plans to roll for him gets 5 copies amen 🙏#i love c.onstantine so much im im im im im#but then it hit me-- i cant throw all my savings because- RULER M.ORIARTY IS ALSO COMING-#c.harlie too but i feel like i can get him anytime for some reason; since hes quite popular im sure he'll drop more times in banners (?)#its going to be a pain to arrange my support team now bc- ody is my current main rider; but Constantine is also a rider#and i think i have billy on the special slot; AGH!#me holding my 47429743891103847 favorite characters: I CANT PICK ONE THEY ARE ALL FAVORITES#w.akamori wait for me.... -grabs his ahoge for emotional support-#I ALSI FINALLY GOT A.SHWATTHAMA! with the free 4 star ticket#i was really debating to pick him or n.ero-#i always keep delaying poor n.ero bc i feel like she drops more often on banners even tho i still dont have her#as for my savings on my jp account-- we dont talk about those 👹#-staring off the window at beautiful e.dmond d.antes that i did not get coughs-#I USED ALL MY M.OCTE AND C.AMAZOTZ SAVINGS TOO- SO IM BALD NOW#i also debated on nito my beloved for the free 4star but i thought i had her so i was like mmmm#i do have her but only on my jp account
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
i really want to start making a table collecting statistics on the audience demographics i'll perform my aubrey material for (like what generation most of the audience is, whether i'm performing in a predominantly queer space, etc.) and how well the jokes land bc like. i need to collect more data points before i can properly present my findings but the results so far have been fascinating
#again i do not have enough performance experiences to make any definitive claims about who ''aubery's audience'' is#but i find it funny that any time i show my aubrey material one-on-one to a queer gen z person#they're always like ''i love it but straight people will definitely hate it or not get it''#and i get the inclination to be like. ''i like this thing so people like me will like this thing''#and cishet society seems so polarized w/r/t queer topics it's like. the assumption makes sense#however. whenever i've done an aubrey performance in front of an audience that's predominantly queer and gen z#i've actually received a primarily negative response!! and somehow straight people have never given me shit for my aubrey material#(''well straight allys don't count'' i told some of my aubrey jokes to a joe rogan dudebro and he enjoyed them)#(which yeah maybe could be a mark against my comedy but i like to think i opened his mind a bit at the very least)#i really want to test my aubrey monologues in front of a primarily gen x/boomer audience#bc so far i only have actual performance experience in front of gen z or millennials#and the older people i've told jokes to individually or shown videos of my stuff have really liked it#luckily paul has said a goal for when i'm in town this summer is to get me to perform my aubrey stuff in as many different places as possib#for both queer audiences and non-queer audiences so i can gauge reactions since i don't want to be confined to one demographic#so i'll get a lot of data points this summer#@ paul get me a performing slot at senior citizen pride lmao these are my people#(shoutout to paul going ''jess stop collecting the old homos!'' last time i was in town)#(and when i imitated him and was like ''old gay men are not your pokemon!'' bellini was like ''ok but they may be your audience'')#also one data point i really want to see the variation on is how my one specific joke plays in these different demographics#bc i have a joke that like. it's literally not even about AIDS and doesn't punch down at all#i literally say ''if you're gay and over the age of 50 you could violate the geneva convention and i'd still be like support our troops''#like obviously being like ''you have been through hell so i will let you get away with literal war crimes you deserve ultimate immunity''#BUT. in the line right before the quote i use the phrase ''AIDS generation'' not as a derogatory term but being like.#this horrible thing impacted the entire generation y'know? and bellini and scott and their friends call themselves that it's just the term#but when i said the phrase ''AIDS generation'' in front of my gen z audience i heard gasps and felt like they all hated me#and when i did the same line in front of millennials it wasn't quite as striking but their eyes did widen#like i was suddenly an ''edgy comedian''. but like this is a part of our history and it does inform the story i'm telling#the story i'm telling is comedic but it's grounded in this real world context#and i'm like. @ the audience who was offended: when was the last time any of y'all spoke to a gay man over the age of 50#bc bellini loves that section of the monologue and was offended that people would even take offense to that phrase
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
blaaaauhhhghhgh [melting into a goop] aohhhghghhshabh
#just me hi#Blahhhaahahaaaaaaaaaaaa#oh BLOO#poo. ploo. bloop#i wanna work on my comic. sniff#'why don't you then' Becausssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssse [wild vague gesturing]#balalaglalgaguauhuglhaslghuhsdgk#Bllllaaaaaaaaaahhhh#//when i speak in quotations that's more my other me talking than you just to be clear hbfvhsf#sometimes being contrary can look like being in full and unwavering support of the same things Lmaooo#me vs. the squaters in my brain (it was mutual for them to move in) (they are trying to be helpful (and are successful mostly (i'm just#being. well. contrary hfbshv)))#//but ye yea ye#my brother helped me set up my emulator and !!! and i can play sky on my puter now :DD#i woulda set it up but. i am always afraid i'll lose track of the directions hfhsh#i could have the instructions etched into my brain and i'm still going to be So sure i imagined them wrong or something lolll#//MAN. i should... [<- staring into the abyss very hard]#!!!!!!#i think i'm in a pocket of hyperness for some reason where did this come from Hfbsvbhf#/hey does being excited hurt sometimes lol#like if i don't throw it out somehow it feels like my chest is constricting and it'll do it to such an extent that i'll become a black hole#bhsf :>#when i was younger i just avoided things that made me too Whee cuz i didn't like it hfvbsh#but now i just sort of put it all into happy handing it so hard i hurt my wrists a lil hfhs :3#//anyway my computer's getting hot oo#i should turn on my cooling thing#oh and also prolly finish this piece lol#/i might make it a small comic (love short comics sm (i have so many)) out of it but who knows hfh :>>#//duos my beloved <33
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
"it was me, i was the guy who shot and missed" not joel fucking miller saying he tried to commit suicide over my breakfast...
#the last of us#tlou lb#tlou spoilers#joel miller#see THIS is why idc say joel is selfish or whatever i'll always support him#NEVER DARE calling him a bad guy tho#because he's not#the man literally would rather put a bullet in his head rather than go through losing a daughter again#suicide tw
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#i feel so pressured to make art and to sell it :/#my dad is constantly telling to sell art#he keeps showing me videos on how to make prints and where to sell it#i do appreciate his support#but he always pressures me to make something out of my hobbies#i judt wanna have fun with art and he wants me to make money out of it#to make content out of it#he doesn't understand why i dont feel ready to sell art#i haven't even drawn in weeks!!#i just wanna exist in my hobbies for fun and not have to turn it into work#i feel so pressured man#i do want to be an artist but being an artist isn't easy#there's no guarantee that I'll be successful and he's so sure i will be#which i appreciate but im just not ready to put myself out there yet :(#i dont feel prepared at all
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm also so pissed because Phu came back, accepted the job with Nan's company that Nan literally fought to help him avoid, then up and abandoned him AND his fucking job. Like Phu fucks with Nan's personal life so much that now he needs to let that bleed into Nan's professional life? Nan was doing fine. He was literally letting go and moving on with his life when Phu returned and fucked everything up again. Phu has no sense of responsibility. Not even for his own damn coffee shop. I can forgive a lot, but I cannot forgive people fucking with jobs/careers. Nan deserves to feel secure in at least one aspect of his life damn it.
#the promise#the promise the series#the promise bl#if someone came into my personal life and fucked it up i won't be happy but i'll deal#but if someone came along and fucked with my job and my career?#heads would roll#phu doesn't care abut anyone outside of himself#he hasn't thought of anyone else once during this entire show#and the only time he kind of did is when party told phu everything nan had done for him#and it would be a good idea not to be a shitty friend in return and maybe do one nice thing so nan can fucking keep his job#fuck phu and i mean this sincerely#i hope he gets a paper cut between his fingers and his fingernails#all of them#and also that everything he ever eats ever again is just ever so slightly too spicy for him#including the water he drinks#i hope he always has one mosquito bite in a random yet inconvenient place at all times#i hope phu has to watch as nan learns to live his life without him and falls in love with another man#i hope phu sees nan love a man and never forgives himself for thinking that nan would do anything but be supportive of him#for thinking nan could be the kind of person he envisioned as disgusted and homophobic#nan literally initiated a kiss that turned into them making out before phu disappeared#yeah they were drunk#but to think that nan would be disgusted after that? does phu even know the man he claims to love? to think nan could be so awful?#they made out and then phu ran away for ten years#kjsdhgkjsdhgkh i'll stop ranting now but just know i'm still mad and thinking angry thoughts about it
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
You know, I grew up catholic and never experienced catholic guilt, and it still kind of confuses me
When I went to mass, the readings and the gospel were always just life lessons or stories to make you think, and what it wanted you to think about was usually humility and piety and loyalty and faith and stuff like that
Faith formation was mostly about learning the history of the church and important stories that you should remember, plus prayer memorization
I don't ever actually remember a time where they were specifically like "you must feel guilty about this" or "everyone by default deserves to go to hell and you must constantly prostrate before god to be deemed worthy"
It was "everyone sins and everyone drifts away from god and that's okay because he will never abandon you"
It was "Jesus died for your sins. To liberate you from them so you're no longer beholden to the old way, so you're no longer beholden to original sin, so you can have a clean slate without ceaseless penance"
The sin forgiveness cycle that Catholics kind of get pulled into was always described to me as a liberating cycle. It gives you the freedom to sin and the freedom to make mistakes as you bumble through the blind chaos of life without worrying about perfection or damnation
Even when I went to confession it wasn't just a blanket "don't do it again" it was "think about why that is a sin and let that experience teach you something."
If I know anything about catholics it's that they love rules and they love the pursuit of knowledge, I once had a very long conversation with a priest about why a certain rule was a rule and why a certain sin was a sin and it was a lot more complicated than just "god said so," even if I can't remember the specifics anymore
I don't know, maybe it was my specific diocese or I've just been around a lot of liberal priests or something, but I even had someone tell me basically word for word "As long as you follow the ten commandments and use the seven virtues as a framework to guide you, you're set. Use confession to scrub away the sins you can't avoid and that's it. Nobody is without sin so just do your best and that's all anyone can ask of you."
Primarily, what growing up catholic taught me was just the importance of love
Love your family, love your neighbor, love a stranger, love the Earth, love nature, and fundamentally love yourself. And forgive yourself. And be patient with yourself. Because I was taught that everyone sins and that's okay.
And that's okay.
I was taught that seeking absolution and forgiveness is meant to steer you in the right direction, yes for the ultimate goal of heaven, which was defined to me as Oneness with God. And hell was defined to me not as a multi-tiered demon filled demiplane of fire and brimstone and ice, but simply the state of separation from god.
But it wasn't just about salvation it was also about making the Earth we live in now a better place and they are rules specifically to facilitate good communication and good relationships with other people and yourself, and obviously God (but whatever.) It was always basically let God absolve you of your guilt but don't force yourself to feel guilty if you make a mistake.
I don't really consider myself catholic anymore, mostly because of other people, catholics and protestants who use their religion as a tool to spread hateful rhetoric and become their own personal left hand of God, instead of using their religion to spread love and patience and understanding and forgiveness and tolerance and all of the things that they actually fucking preach. Why y'all throwing stones huh? Y'all ain't without sin. Literally nobody is. That's the point.
But I like what I was taught. I use what I was taught a lot. Technically even if I don't consider myself catholic I still am. I have been confirmed, I could waltz right into a catholic church confess my sins and my doubts and have a long conversation with a priest and boom blank slate once more. There would be penance hoops I would have to jump through but that's literally what happens with every confession, so still
But that's always what confused me about Catholic guilt like
What were you taught?
#lila speaks#Catholicism#and I was never really taught to police my thoughts either#like jealousy and stuff were taught as bad but the emphasis was on action and intent#which may have mostly been my parents and the area I grew up in#my personal beliefs about the universe have shifted as I'm grown up so I don't think I'll ever actually be returning to the Catholic church#maybe I wasn't paying attention for that I guess?#but faith was always taught to me as like#trust god to guide you and trust him to forgive you#and trust him to not get mad over every little thing you do#I dunno I'm not even catholic anymore so what do I know#I just think punishing yourself is ridiculous#I'm reminded of the story about that wealthy man's son though I can't remember his name#where one son goes off to do whatever and completely forge his own path and basically abandoned the family#and the other son works hard every single day supporting the family working the farm etc etc etc#and then the other son comes home and the father is immediately like slaughter the fatty calf we are going to have a party#my son has returned and I am through the Moon#he didn't care that his son left and disappeared#he cared that he came back#I always took that as a story about God's relationship with Christians#do what you need to do to live your life and leave if you must#and then celebrate when you return#that was always the message I was given#and then there was the other story about the other son getting jealous because he put all this work in for the father#but he didn't get his own party so he was mad because he felt like he didn't get the recognition he deserved#but it wasn't really about him because he was always there#anyway my opinions about the universe and how it works has shifted as I have gotten older#and I'm not big on religious obligations so I've forged my own spiritual path that is distinctly and notably heretical#but my roots are Catholic and it still affects the way I interact with the world and in some ways I am grateful#but I've moved on
1 note
·
View note
Text
after watching percy jackson and the olympians i will replay rage of the titans and switch sid-
#i mean i always thought luke was right 👩🏻🦯#in rott i was very torn on who to support but ended up siding with the gods cause we were gods??#i've been wanting to replay for a while cause i misS MY MAN MURPHY anyway#i'll take the opportunity to side with the titans now lmao#as i should've done before 💀#romance club#rc rott
5 notes
·
View notes