#i’m tired of hearing about her. tired of all she represents
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we must rid this world of the specter of The Girl
#i’m tired of hearing about her. tired of all she represents#girl should refer to children! that’s it#girl should not refer to anything else or carry any other meaning or be a marketing technique through which to peddle cosmetic products and#diet regimes and hair removal procedures
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TABLE 3 | JJK ch24
*.°* pairing : pre!military jk x waitress/ secret fuckbuddy reader

"For good service, and cute waitresses."
warnings: smut, alc consumption, fluff, profanity, angst, humour, fluff, celebrity au, idolljungkook, mentions of other kpop groups/idols, inner conflict, insecurity, fluff at the start!! they kiss eachother w lipstick and take pics. but turns sad real quick lol
smut warnings: unprotected sex, they both cry during it, “please dont leave me”, he tries dirty talking mid way and realises thats not what u need, no prep lol, riding, sideways fucking, missionary, aftercare, kissing, its sad but still filthy, oral f receiving, forced eye contact.
wc: longggg
this fic is not meant to represent the real jungkook or any other characters mentioned!
*.°* taglist: @jenniebyrubies @dreamersparacosm @darklove2020 @rayyrayy10 @elinaki92 @alana4610 @bjoriis @kaitieskidmore97 @cuntessaiii @lovingkoalaface @bigsteppagangsterizzie @hangescn @angie-x3
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The diner is buzzing today, but you barely hear it.
The hum of conversation, the clatter of plates, the distant sizzle of something frying in the kitchen—it’s all just background noise to the thoughts spinning in your head.
Jungkook rushed out of Nari’s apartment hours ago, muttering something about a last-minute meeting, and you haven’t heard from him since. Not that it’s weird—he’s insanely busy these days, and you’re trying really hard not to let that little fact ruin your mood.
But there’s only three days left.
Three.
When Jungkook told you he had a week left, you didn’t think he meant he was leaving on Friday.
Friday.
And it’s already Tuesday.
And it’s like time is slipping through your fingers no matter how hard you try to hold onto it.
You push through your shift, doing your best to keep up with Nari’s usual antics—she’s thriving off your distracted state, making fun of you for staring into space one too many times—but it’s all so much.
Before you know it, the shift is over.
Nari drops you home, pulling up outside your apartment with a tired sigh. “You okay?” she asks, even though she knows the answer.
You nod. “Yeah.”
She squints at you. “Liar.”
You sniff, and she groans, already regretting asking. “Go call your stupid boyfriend.” She teases.
“He’s not my—”
“Shut up, yes, he is.”
You roll your eyes, shoving her playfully before stepping out of the car. And the second you’re inside, you call Jungkook.
It only rings twice before he picks up. “Hey, baby.”
The sound of his voice makes your heart ache. “I miss you.”
A pause. Then a quiet sigh. “I know. I miss you, too.”
You squeeze your eyes shut, trying so hard to keep your voice steady. “I can’t believe it’s so soon.”
“I know,” he murmurs. “I’m sorry—”
“No, don’t be sorry,” you say quickly. “It’s just… I don’t know. Are you free right now?”
There’s a pause. “Right now?”
“Yeah, now.”
“Shit, baby, I wish—” He sighs again. “I have to be up early tomorrow. I’m seeing my family all day, so I don’t think—”
“You’re not gonna see me tomorrow?”
Jungkook hesitates. “I can drop by in the morning—”
And then— You wail.
Like, full-on dramatic sobbing.
“Noooooo,” you cry, clutching your pillow for emotional support. “Please, don’t gooo, please, Jungkook, I can’t do this—”
“What the fuck—” Jungkook panics. “Baby, stop—”
“Jungkook, I’m gonna diiiieeee,” you wail louder, rolling onto your back. “I can’t live without you for one night, pleaseee—”
“Oh, my fucking—”
“Jungkooooooook—”
“Fine!” he finally yells, defeated. “ Fine, fine, I’ll come, but only for a few hours, stop crying baby I-!”
You immediately stop sniffling. “Really?”
Jungkook squints at his phone. Suspicious.
“Yes, really, but I swear to god, if I show up and you’re asleep, I’ll kill you.”
You beam, wiping your totally fake tears. “Okay, hurry up.”
But then—guilt.
“Oh my god, wait, you don’t have to,” you say quickly. “I’m sorry, you’re probably exhausted, I shouldn’t have—”
“No, it’s fine,” Jungkook interrupts. “Really. I wanna see you anyway. But seriously. Only a few hours, okay?”
“Okay, okay, I promise.”
You don’t.
But he doesn’t have to know that.
Just like you predicted, when Jungkook finally shows up, he looks exhausted.
His eyes are heavy, his shoulders slouched, and the second he steps inside, he lets out a long breath like he’s been waiting all day to finally be here.
And suddenly, you feel so guilty. “I’m sorry,” you say immediately, suddenly feeling small as you stand there in your hoodie. “I shouldn’t have—”
“No, stop,” Jungkook interrupts, shaking his head as he pulls you in. His arms wrap tight around you, and he buries his face in the crook of your neck, inhaling deep. “I love you, okay? We don’t have much time left, so I’m making the most of it.”
You soften. “Okay.”
“Let’s forget about it for now,” he murmurs against your skin before pulling back. “I’m only staying till twelve, so, three hours.”
You pout, already feeling the time slipping away. “That’s not enough.”
Jungkook sighs, brushing his fingers down your cheek. “I’ll stop by in the morning if you really want me to.”
Your eyes widen. “You promise?”
“I promise.”
You hold out your pinky, and Jungkook huffs a laugh before linking his with yours, pressing a kiss to the side of your hand for good measure.
And with that, you both settle into your bedroom, climbing onto your bed like it’s just another normal night. You talk about everything and nothing at the same time, just enjoying each other’s presence, fingers tangled together on the sheets.
At some point, you get curious. “So, what do you think you’ll get up to in the military?”
Jungkook hums, shifting onto his side to look at you. “I don’t know. I’m definitely not excited, but I guess it’ll be nice to have a break.”
You nod, listening intently as he sighs. “Unfortunately, I can’t be in one of the fancier units, though.”
“Why?”
“Visible tattoos,” he shrugs. “You can’t enlist in certain sectors if you have them. I’ll probably end up in something boring.”
Your brows furrow. “Wait—does that mean you’ll still be working out?”
Jungkook gives you a look. “Why do you sound excited?”
You sit up slightly. “Does this mean you’ll get bigger?”
He squints. “Maybe. Yes. I don’t know—do you want me to?”
Your entire face lights up. “Yes, oh my god, yes—” You bounce on the bed, grinning. “Please!”
Jungkook laughs, grabbing your wrists to stop you from shaking the bed. “I’m already big!”
“But imagine— bigger!”
Jungkook groans, flopping onto his back dramatically. “Why do I feel like you’re gonna make me send you muscle updates when I’m there?”
“Oh, I am,” you confirm, grinning. “Get ready for me to demand flexing videos every week.”
He rolls over, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you down until you’re nose to nose. “You’re ridiculous,” he mutters.
You grin.
A few minutes later, you’re perched on Jungkook’s lap, lips fused to his, hands in his hair, completely lost in him. It’s like you can’t help it—like there’s this unspoken rule now that you have to touch him, kiss him, hold onto him as much as possible while you still can.
Jungkook clearly has the same thought, because the second you try pulling back, he’s tugging you right back in, hands firm on your hips.
But you just giggle, pushing at his chest. “No, wait. I have an idea.”
Jungkook groans dramatically, head falling back against the headboard. “Baby, c’mon—”
You ignore him, scrambling for your nightstand until your fingers close around a tube of lipstick.
Jungkook eyes you warily. “What are you doing?”
Instead of answering, you pop the cap off and swipe the color across your lips. Then, before he can react, you lean in and press a kiss to his cheek. Then another. And another.
“Y/N—!” He squirms, laughing as you attack his face, leaving imprints of your lips across his skin. “Stop, that tickles!”
“No,” you say simply, completely unbothered. “You’re cute.”
“Stop calling me cute.”
“You are cute.”
Jungkook groans in defeat, letting you assault his face with kisses while his hands absentmindedly squeeze at your waist.
You grab your Polaroid camera and snap a picture before he can react.
“Hey—!”
Too late. You’re already shaking it, grinning down at the image of his completely kiss-covered face. “Oh, this is going on the wall.”
Jungkook watches as you add it right next to the first-ever picture you took of him—the one where he was buried under your plushies.
The little collection is growing.
You turn back to him. “Okay, take your shirt off.”
Jungkook perks up. “Oh?” He doesn’t hesitate, tugging it over his head in one smooth motion.
You beam. “Good.” Then, you lean down and repeat the process—pressing kisses along his collarbones, his chest, each of his abs—until he’s laughing, trying to twist away from the ticklish sensation.
“Baby—stop, I can’t—”
“Nope.” You snap another picture of him, now covered in even more lipstick stains. “I win.”
Jungkook watches as you struggle to find more space on the wall, eventually just sticking them in random spots. One even goes into your phone case.
“You’re insane,” he mutters, shaking his head.
“You love it.”
He hums, and then, suddenly, “My turn.”
You blink. “What? No—”
Too late. He grabs the lipstick from your hand, rolling you onto your back in one swift motion. “Stay still,” he murmurs, straddling your waist.
“Jungkook—”
“Shhh,” he hushes you, uncapping the lipstick. His touch is slow, careful as he smears the color across his lips. His fingers linger against your jaw, his eyes heavy-lidded as he takes you in.
You’re blushing, gripping at his arm for support.
Compared to how frantic you were before, Jungkook is slow.
Painfully, teasingly slow.
And when he finally leans down, he starts his attack—pressing deliberate kisses all over your cheeks, your jaw, your collarbone, your neck—taking his sweet time.
You squirm, flustered, but he just smirks. “What? You don’t like it when it’s you?”
You grab a pillow and whack him with it.
Jungkook cackles, reaching for your camera. “How do I use this thing?”
You scoff. “Oh, so you’re not a camera expert anymore?”
“I don’t know how to use your kiddie camera.”
You gasp, offended. “It’s not a kiddie camera! It’s a Polaroid, for your information.”
Jungkook grins. “I know how to use it—I just wanted you to teach me.”
You roll your eyes, guiding his hands over the camera. “Like this.”
Jungkook snaps a bunch of pictures of you, grinning at the results. But instead of giving them to you, he tucks a few into his pocket.
“What are you doing?” you ask.
“I’m keeping them.”
You pause, realizing. “Will you look at them when you’re gone?”
He shrugs, smiling softly. “Maybe.”
The mood shifts. You’re both curled up in bed now, Jungkook holding you close, rubbing small circles on your back. You feel him shift, checking the time.
“Babe, I have to leave soon.”
You tense. “I know.”
And then it hits you again.
An hour left until he has to go.
Three days left until he’s gone for real.
Jungkook knows you’re thinking about it—he sees it in your face. So he tightens his hold on you, pressing a kiss to your temple. “I promise I’ll come by tomorrow.”
You nod. “I know.”
“I’ll text you. I’ll update you about everything.”
“You don’t have to,” you murmur. “I know you’ll miss your family, too.”
Jungkook sighs. “Yeah. I will.”
And then you realize—it’s not just you he’s leaving.
It’s his family. His members. His fans.
It’s everyone.
And suddenly, you feel selfish.
Jungkook notices the shift in you immediately, his hand finding your cheek. “Hey. You’re okay. I promise.”
You don’t answer. But you do let yourself relax into him, nuzzling into his chest, letting his heartbeat soothe you. Eventually, you drift off—still covered in his kisses.
Jungkook waits until you’re fully asleep before gently rummaging through your nightstand, looking for wipes. He knows what it’s like to fall asleep with makeup on—it always makes him feel gross in the morning—so he carefully cleans the lipstick off your skin, making sure to be gentle as you unconsciously nuzzle into his touch.
When he’s done, he presses a kiss to your forehead. Then another. And another.
He doesn’t want to leave.
Not now. Not in three days.
He debates staying, but then you stir, your brows furrowing slightly, and he knows he can’t.
So instead, he whispers, “I love you so much.”
And even in your sleep, you mewl at the sound of it, your body immediately relaxing, like it’s enough for now.
Jungkook stands there for a moment, just watching you, before finally slipping out of bed.
He takes in the sight of your room—the little details, the chaos, the way it perfectly reflects you—and he finds himself smiling.
His eyes land on your Polaroid wall, at all the little moments captured there.
He debates taking down one of the pictures you took of him earlier, thinking he doesn’t look great in it, but in the end, he leaves it. And just before he leaves, he snaps one last picture of you—fast asleep, peaceful, his favorite sight in the world.
——
Jungkook drives home in silence.
The whole way there, his heart feels full—so much so that it’s almost enough to distract him from what’s coming. Almost.
But then, the second he steps into his apartment, the feeling changes. He goes through the motions—taking off his shoes, tossing his bag onto the couch, getting ready for bed—but it all feels too normal. Like it’s just another night. Like tomorrow won’t be another countdown to leaving.
And the second he touches his bed, it hits him all at once. The sob breaks out of him before he can even stop it. He curls in on himself, gripping his sheets, his chest aching in a way he can’t even describe.
He doesn’t want to go.
He doesn’t want to go.
And before he can even think about it, his fingers are already dialing your number.
It rings once.
Twice.
Three times. No answer.
You’re asleep.
He knows he shouldn’t wake you up, so he stops himself from calling again—but the loneliness is too much, the silence in his apartment is too loud, and before he knows it, he’s calling again.
But not you this time.
Namjoon answers on the second ring. “Hello?”
Jungkook chokes on a sob. “Hyung—”
“Jungkook? What’s wrong?”
And then it all comes out.
“I don’t want to go,” Jungkook cries, his chest heaving as he grips the phone like it’s the only thing keeping him grounded. His voice is raw, cracking under the weight of everything. “I don’t—I don’t want to leave, I don’t want to leave her—”
Namjoon sighs on the other end, the kind of sigh that carries years of understanding. The kind that says, I know this hurts.
“I know,” he says softly.
“I can’t do it,” Jungkook gasps, shaking his head even though Namjoon can’t see him. “I can’t—I can’t wake up tomorrow and pretend everything’s fine. It’s not fine. I just—” His voice breaks, and the silence that follows is filled with his quiet, shaking breaths.
“You have to,” Namjoon says after a beat, gentle but firm. “You knew this day would come. It’s not forever, Jungkook.”
Jungkook squeezes his eyes shut. “It feels like forever.”
Namjoon hums, thoughtful. “She took you back, right?”
Jungkook nods through his tears, even though Namjoon isn’t there to see it. “Yeah.”
“Then she’ll wait for you.”
Jungkook’s throat tightens. He wants to believe that—he really does. But the fear is suffocating.
“What if she doesn’t?” he asks, voice barely above a whisper. “What if she moves on? What if—” His voice cracks again, and he bites his lip hard to keep it together. “I love her. I told her, properly this time. At the beach. And she—she looked at me like I was her whole world.”
Namjoon is quiet for a moment. Then, softly, “Then trust her, Jungkook.”
Jungkook sniffles. “But what if—”
Namjoon cuts him off, echoing his words from when he’d given him advice a long time ago, “Then that’s a risk you have to take.”
Jungkook hates that answer. Because it’s not the reassurance he wants. It’s not a guarantee. But he knows Namjoon is right.
His fingers loosen around his phone, exhausted, defeated. “I watched her fall asleep earlier,” he murmurs, his voice thick. “She was just… there. So warm. So peaceful. Like she knew she was safe with me.”
Namjoon hums again, quieter this time. “And you’ll have that again. Maybe not soon. Maybe not next month. But you will.”
Jungkook swallows down another sob. “I don’t want to do this without her.”
“You’re not doing this without her,” Namjoon corrects him. “She’s still with you. And if she’s the one, she’ll still be there when you come back.”
Jungkook doesn’t reply. He just breathes, listening to Namjoon’s steady presence on the other end. It’s quiet, the only sound their breathing, and somehow, that makes it easier.
Eventually, exhaustion wins.
Jungkook drifts off, his phone still in his hand, with Namjoon still on the line
——
When Jungkook wakes up, it’s to his alarm blaring at 5 AM.
His head is heavy, his throat is dry from crying, but he doesn’t have time to dwell on it—he has to meet his family soon.
Without thinking, he reaches for his phone. His fingers type out a message before he can overthink it.
Jungkook [5:07 AM]: hi baby, im coming in like an hour. do you want anything?
No response. You’re probably still asleep.
He sighs, pushing himself out of bed, rubbing at his tired eyes. Then, he hops in the shower, letting the water wash away everything from the night before. There’s still some remnants on lipstick on his chest and his abdomen and he scrubs away even if it physically hurts him to.
When he steps out, he doesn’t check his phone right away. Because if you haven’t responded yet, he’s not sure if he can handle that feeling right now. Jungkook gets in his car, barely even processing the motion of turning the keys in the ignition. His mind is elsewhere.
Two days.
Two days is nothing.
Today and tomorrow.
He exhales sharply through his nose, gripping the steering wheel a little too tight as he pulls out onto the road. He knows today is supposed to be for his family. He’s not mad about it—he misses them, and he wants to see them before he goes.
But at the same time…
He’d rather be with you.
He shakes the thought away, clicking his tongue against his teeth as he focuses on driving. Not like it matters. He still has this morning, at least.
His stomach grumbles, but instead of stopping somewhere for himself, he takes a sharp turn, heading towards a tiny, shitty food truck that he knows has just opened for the morning. The kind of place that only locals know about, nothing fancy, nothing overhyped—just good, simple food.
You’d love it.
So he pulls up without hesitation, quickly placing an order for pancakes and waiting impatiently, checking the time on his phone every other second.
5:30 AM.
He still has time. It’s not enough, but it’ll have to be. His fingers tap against his thigh as he debates his next move.
The field.
His chest clenches at the thought.
Fuck it. By the time he gets his order, he’s already made up his mind. The drive to the field is second nature at this point, muscle memory guiding him as he turns onto the small, secluded road leading there.
When he finally parks, he steps out, stretching his arms with a sigh as the cool morning air washes over him. The sun isn’t fully up yet, but there’s a soft golden glow in the distance, and for a moment, Jungkook just stands there, taking it in.
He wonders if you’re awake yet.
He wonders if you’d be mad if you knew he was here without you.
But he doesn’t dwell on it for long—he steps forward, wandering into the field, eyes scanning for the small patches of daisies that always seem to grow in the same spots.
It takes a few minutes, but he finds them, crouching down and picking a few with careful hands, letting the scent of the fresh petals fill his nose.
And then, without wasting another second, he’s back in his car, pancakes in one hand, flowers in the other, driving straight to your apartment.
Jungkook knocks, shifting his weight from foot to foot as he glances down at the bag of pancakes in his hand and the small bunch of daisies in the other.
It’s almost six now.
It takes a bit longer than usual for you to answer, and he figures you’re probably still asleep. He doesn’t mind waiting.
And then, finally—
The door creaks open, and—
Oh.
His heart clenches so hard it almost fucking hurts.
You’re standing there, still groggy with sleep, wearing a t-shirt that barely covers the tops of your thighs, your hair messy from sleep, one eye squinted shut as you rub at it lazily. You let out a soft yawn, blinking at him like you’re still processing the fact that he’s even here.
And then—
Your eyes widen, fully waking up as you beam at him, and before he can even get a word out, you reach forward, tugging him inside by the sleeve of his hoodie and wrapping your arms around him.
Jungkook barely has time to react before he’s melting into you, inhaling the faint traces of your shampoo as he buries his face in the crook of your neck.
You’re so warm.
And it sucks.
It fucking sucks that he only has two days left with you.
But for now—for you, and for himself—he pretends that he’s not leaving at all.
Jungkook expects you to pull him into the kitchen like always, maybe tease him for being up so early, maybe sit across from him at the counter as you both eat.
Instead—
You take the bag from his hands, peeking inside curiously. “What’s this?”
He raises a brow. “Pancakes. And flowers. Duh.”
You smile, stepping closer to press a soft kiss to his cheek. “Thank you, baby.”
His heart stutters.
But before he can say anything, you drop the bag on the counter and—
Take his hand.
And pull him toward your bedroom.
Jungkook blinks. Wait.
He’s confused for a second, expecting you to sit him down or do something—but you just stand there, looking a little sheepish, rubbing at your arm before mumbling—
“Can you just… hold me?”
His chest tightens.
For a second, all he can do is stare. And then, he tugs you in gently, leading you back to the bed without another word. You follow without hesitation, crawling under the sheets as he settles in beside you.
You snuggle into his side immediately, arms wrapped around his waist, face tucked into his chest, your breath warm against his skin. Jungkook exhales deeply, pressing a kiss to the top of your head, his arms winding securely around you.
Two days.
He pretends it’s forever.
The room is quiet.
Neither of you really sleep. You just lay there, wrapped up in each other, lost in silence. Jungkook keeps his eyes on the ceiling, willing himself not to cry. He counts his breaths, focuses on the steady rhythm of your fingers tracing slow, absentminded circles against his ribs. Every touch feels like a memory being burned into his skin.
He swallows.
Two days. And then, he feels it.
The slight tremble of your body against his. The way your breath starts to hitch. Jungkook’s brows furrow, and he tilts his head to look at you.
And that’s when he sees—
The tears slipping down your cheeks, soaking into his shirt.
His stomach drops.
“Baby…,” he whispers, heart clenching as he cups your cheek, trying to tilt your face toward his. “Are you okay?”
You don’t answer. You just break.
“Please don’t go,” you sob, gripping his shirt in your fists like it’s the only thing keeping you together. “Jungkook, please, don’t—please—”
His chest caves in.
“Baby,” he whispers, his own voice shaking now, his throat burning as he tries to hold it together.
But he can’t. Not when you’re begging like this.
Not when he has no choice but to leave.
He tightens his grip around you, presses his face into your hair, kisses your temple between ragged breaths.
“I’m sorry,” he chokes out, because he doesn’t know what else to say. Because what else is there to say?
You keep crying.
Jungkook just holds you tighter, like maybe if he holds you tight enough, neither of you will have to let go.
Jungkook exhales shakily, his forehead pressed against yours, his own tears mixing with yours. Your breath is uneven, your body trembling against his, and he doesn’t know what to do. Doesn’t know how to make this better.
So he kisses you.
Soft, at first. A silent plea, a desperate apology. His lips catch your cries, drinking them in like they’re the last thing he’ll ever have of you. He feels the way your hands fist into his shirt tighter, pulling him closer like you want to crawl into him, like you never want there to be space between you again.
And then you kiss him back.
It’s messy, wet from tears, but you don’t care. Your lips move against his with urgency, with something bordering on desperation, and Jungkook groans softly when you press closer, shifting in his lap, making it impossible for him to think of anything but you.
You break away for a moment, but he doesn’t let you go far. He chases after you, lips brushing yours as he breathes out, “Y/N—”
And then you’re kissing him again.
Harder, needier.
Jungkook tilts his head, deepens the kiss, one hand slipping under your shirt to press against the warm skin of your waist. His thumb traces over your hip bone, slow, teasing, grounding himself in the feel of you.
Because this—
This is what he wants to remember.
The way you taste, the way you sound when he swallows down another whimper, the way you need him like he needs you.
And when you shift again, rolling your hips against his, your hands slipping beneath his hoodie—
Jungkook loses himself completely.
Your hands tremble as they push his hoodie up, fingertips trailing over the warmth of his skin. You’re not just touching him—you’re memorizing him, pressing your palms flat against his stomach like you can carve the shape of him into your skin, like you can hold onto him in a way time won’t steal from you.
Jungkook shudders beneath your touch, a sharp breath stuttering against your lips. “Baby,” he whispers, voice wrecked, pleading, but he doesn’t know what for. For you to slow down? To never stop? To let him drown in you until he forgets he ever has to leave?
He doesn’t know.
But then you’re kissing him again—slower this time, softer. Like you’re trying to soothe the ache neither of you can put into words. Your lips are swollen, warm, and Jungkook melts into you when your fingers slide into his hair, pulling, tugging, grounding him.
His hands roam too—sweeping over your back, gripping at your waist like he’s afraid you’ll disappear if he lets go. He feels the way your body moves with his, how perfectly you fit against him, and it makes something inside him snap.
“Please,” you whisper, pressing your forehead to his. “Jungkook, please.”
And he knows what you’re asking for.
His hands shake as he peels your shirt off, as he presses reverent kisses down your throat, over your collarbones, his lips mapping out every inch of skin he can reach. His name leaves your lips in a breathless sigh when he takes one of your breasts into his mouth, his tongue slow and worshipful, hands gripping your hips like he’s trying to hold himself together.
But it’s useless.
Because you’re moving against him, rolling your hips in time with the soft sucks of his mouth, and his resolve is crumbling.
You tilt his face up, guiding him back to your lips, and when your thighs tighten around him, he knows he’s lost.
Your fingers tremble as they trace the shape of his face, committing every dip and curve to memory. The slope of his nose, the fullness of his lips, the sharp cut of his jawline. You look at him like you’ll never get to again, and the thought alone makes fresh tears sting your eyes.
Jungkook notices. Of course he does.
“Baby,” he whispers, voice thick, strained. He lifts a hand to wipe at your tears, but before he can, you’re leaning in—pressing a kiss to his forehead.
He stills beneath you.
He’s always the one giving you forehead kisses, tucking you close, making you feel safe, adored. They’re your favorite—always have been. But now, it’s you pressing one to his skin, letting your lips linger against the warmth of him, as if you can pour all your love into this one kiss.
Jungkook exhales sharply. His throat bobs as he swallows hard, like he’s trying to hold back something thick and uncontainable. But you don’t let him—don’t let him retreat into that quiet sadness.
Instead, you kiss him again. And again.
Soft, lingering presses of your lips along his temples, down to the curve of his cheekbone. Then his nose. His jaw.
“I love you,” you whisper between each kiss, voice trembling but sure. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”
Jungkook shatters.
His hands tighten on your waist, like he wants to pull you in, fuse you to him, but he doesn’t move, doesn’t interrupt. Just lets you continue, lets you map out every inch of his body with your mouth.
You kiss down his throat, feeling the way it vibrates as he exhales shakily, his pulse hammering against your lips. You don’t stop. Your fingers slide beneath the hem of his hoodie, peeling it away from his skin. The fabric lifts easily, exposing the smooth planes of his chest, and you waste no time pressing your mouth to the skin there, too.
His collarbones, his shoulders, the firm stretch of his arms—everywhere you can reach, you kiss. Slow, reverent. Worshipful.
By the time you’re tugging at his waistband, Jungkook is a mess beneath you—his chest rising and falling rapidly, his fingers digging into the sheets like they’re the only thing tethering him to reality.
And when you press a final, lingering kiss to the inside of his thigh, Jungkook exhales a shaky, wrecked, “Baby…”
Like he’s already breaking.
Like he doesn’t know how to survive this kind of love.
Jungkook’s hands tremble where they grip your waist, his breath ragged as you press kiss after kiss into his skin—his chest, his stomach, the sharp cut of his hip. You’re not thinking anymore, not planning. Just feeling. Memorizing.
Your fingers slide beneath his waistband, tugging. He lifts his hips instinctively, letting you strip away the last barrier between you, and you don’t waste a second. You straddle him, chest heaving, tears still streaking your cheeks as you take him in your hand, guiding him to where you need him most.
Jungkook stiffens. “Wait, baby, you need—”
You don’t let him finish.
You sink down in one motion, gasping as he fills you, as your body stretches to accommodate him, as he presses so deep it knocks the air from your lungs.
Jungkook’s head snaps back against the pillow. His mouth falls open, a choked groan breaking from his throat as his hands fly to your hips, gripping tight like he’s trying to ground himself, trying not to lose it completely.
“Fuck—” His voice is wrecked. “Baby, you—shit, you didn’t—”
You shake your head frantically, cutting him off, pressing a palm over his mouth as your whole body trembles. You don’t care. You don’t care. You just need him.
“Please,” you whisper, your voice breaking, your nails digging into his chest. “Please don’t go.”
Jungkook’s entire body tenses beneath you.
Your hand falls from his mouth, sliding up to cup his face, thumbs brushing his cheekbones as you lean in. Your lips ghost over his, but you don’t kiss him. Just breathe him in, feel the warmth of his skin, the way he’s shaking from the effort of holding himself together.
“What am I gonna do without you?” Your voice cracks. A fresh wave of tears spills over, dripping onto his cheeks. “I don’t know how to be without you, Jungkook.”
His jaw clenches, his brows furrowing in raw agony. He shakes his head, like he wants to say something, like he wants to comfort you, but he can’t. Because he doesn’t know how.
Because he doesn’t know how to be without you either.
And then you move.
You roll your hips, slow, deep, and Jungkook breaks.
A strangled groan rips from his throat, his hands flying to your ass, gripping hard, as if he can somehow press you closer, somehow keep you here. His head tilts back, exposing his throat, and you kiss him there, feeling the way he swallows thickly beneath your lips.
You lift yourself up and sink down again, choking on a sob as he fills you, as he stretches you so perfectly it hurts. But it’s good. It’s right. Like he belongs here.
Like he belongs with you.
Jungkook pants beneath you, his fingers digging into your skin, but he doesn’t rush you. Just lets you take what you need, lets you set the pace, lets you use him the way he wants to use you.
For comfort. For love. For something to hold onto when everything else is slipping away.
And when you look down at him, when your eyes meet his—
Jungkook looks ruined.
His bottom lip trembles, his dark eyes glassy, pleading, like he’s trying so fucking hard not to cry, trying so fucking hard to be strong.
And you can’t take it.
You bury your face in his shoulder, sobbing against his skin, whispering please, please, please between every ragged breath.
Jungkook presses a hand to the back of your head, cradling you close, his lips finding your temple.
“I love you,” he breathes, voice shaking. “I love you, I love you—”
And then his hands are gripping tighter, his hips rising to meet yours, and you know he’s losing himself, giving himself to you the same way you’re giving yourself to him.
Because there’s no tomorrow.
Not yet.
Right now, there’s only this.
You don’t know how you find the strength to do it.
To lift your head. To force your hands to loosen from their desperate clutch on his body. To just look at him.
Jungkook is barely holding himself together. His chest rises and falls in uneven breaths, his lashes damp, his lips swollen and parted like he’s trying to catch the words before they escape him. But you see it in his eyes.
He’s breaking.
And you don’t have time for that.
You don’t have time for any of it.
So you do the only thing you can.
You push through it. You suck it up.
You exhale shakily, press your forehead to his, and whisper, “Jungkook.”
His eyes flutter shut for half a second, like he’s trying to memorize the way you say his name, the way your breath warms his lips, the way your voice trembles but still holds him.
And then you move.
You wrap your arms around his neck, holding on like it’s the only thing keeping you from falling apart, your fingers slipping into his hair as you rock your hips against him, slow, deep, dragging him into you over and over and over again.
Jungkook sucks in a sharp breath through his teeth, his hands skimming up your back, gripping tight, his nails digging in just enough to ground himself.
And then he’s breathing it back.
“I love you.”
You whimper, squeezing your eyes shut, pressing your lips to his jaw, his cheek, his temple.
“I love you, I love you so much—”
He gasps, his grip tightening, his head tilting back just slightly, enough for you to kiss down his throat, to feel the way he swallows against your lips, to hear the way his breath hitches.
“Please don’t go.”
Jungkook chokes on a sound that’s not quite a sob, not quite a moan, something raw and shattered and so fucking helpless.
And then his arms lock around you, crushing you against him, as he buries his face in your shoulder, his voice breaking completely.
“I don’t wanna go.”
Your entire body tenses. Your breath stutters in your throat.
“I don’t wanna go, I don’t wanna go—”
It’s the first time he’s said it. The first time he’s let it slip, the first time he’s let himself admit it—that he doesn’t want to leave you. That it’s killing him. That if he had a choice, if the world would just fucking let him—
He would stay.
Your nails sink into his skin, your hips grinding down harder, desperate, frantic, like you can somehow make him stay, like you can fuse yourself to him, like you can press him so deep inside you that he’ll never leave.
“Then stay,” you whisper.
Jungkook’s breath shudders against your skin, his fingers curling into your flesh like he wants to.
Like he wants to so fucking bad.
He doesn’t know what to do with this, with you, with the weight of everything pressing into his chest like a vice. He’s gripping onto you like you’ll slip through his fingers the second he lets go, like he’ll wake up tomorrow and you’ll be nothing but a dream.
“Then stay.”
Your words echo in his skull, looping, endless, clawing at something deep inside him.
He can’t.
He wants to. But he can’t.
And so—he panics.
“Gonna miss this pussy so much,” he mutters, his voice strained, desperate, trying to ground himself in something, anything, trying to fill the unbearable silence that follows his own fucking admission. His hands skim down your back, gripping your hips, fingers digging into your skin.
“Miss feeling you wrapped around me like this—”
You inhale sharply, body tensing, and—fuck.
No.
No, that’s not what you need.
Jungkook realizes it the second the words leave his mouth. The second he hears himself, hears how it sounds—like he’s trying to distract himself, like he’s trying to make this just about fucking when it’s so much more.
He hears the way your breath shakes, how your grip loosens ever so slightly, how you start to pull away—
And he panics again.
“Shit—baby—”
His body moves before his mind catches up.
He flips you over in one swift motion, pressing you into the mattress, his breath ragged, his heart pounding, something frantic and terrified behind his eyes as he cages you beneath him.
Your wide, tear-filled gaze meets his, your lip trembling, and Jungkook’s entire body locks up.
Fuck.
He nearly loses it right then and there. Nearly breaks. But instead—he just moves.
He doesn’t know how to make this better. He doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t know how to fix the mess he’s made.
So he just— Kisses you.
Soft.
Deep.
He pours everything into it, every unspoken word, every apology, every ounce of guilt, every single part of him that belongs to you.
His hands trace up your sides, slow, deliberate, like he’s trying to commit you to memory.
Like he’s trying to hold on just a little longer.
Jungkook collapses against you.
All of his weight, all of his warmth, all of him—pressing you into the mattress, crushing you, suffocating you, swallowing you whole.
And you let him.
Because if he’s on you, if he’s in you, if he’s covering every inch of your body with his, then maybe—just maybe—you won’t have to face the sight of him leaving.
“Fuck—”
His breath stutters against your neck, his voice wrecked, helpless, and the only thing keeping him from fully melting into you is the slow, deep drag of his hips, the way he’s sinking into you like he never wants to leave.
Like he never wants to stop.
“Jungkook—”
His name leaves your lips in a desperate sob, your hands clawing at him, grasping, clutching, threading through his hair, pressing into his back, like you’re begging him to stay.
His jaw clenches, his fingers digging into the sheets on either side of your head, his entire body trembling with the weight of his own emotions.
“I love you,” you whisper, voice breaking, lips brushing the shell of his ear. “I love you so much—please, please—”
Jungkook’s body locks up.
You feel the sharp, unsteady inhale against your throat, the way his hips slow, the way his entire frame shudders above you.
And then. He moves. Faster. Harder.
Like he’s trying to drown himself in you.
Like he’s trying to answer you in the only way he can.
“I don’t wanna go,” he chokes out, voice thick, breath ragged. His hands find yours, fisting them into the sheets, lacing your fingers together, grounding himself in the way you squeeze back. “Fuck, baby, I don’t wanna go—”
But he has to.
And you both know it.
You barely notice when Jungkook shifts, when he maneuvers you onto your side with him, pulling you flush against his chest, his body curving around yours like he’s shielding you from reality itself.
But you do notice the way he rolls his hips against you, slow, deliberate, grinding against your soaked, swollen folds like he’s trying to commit the sensation to memory.
And fuck—
Maybe he is.
“Jungkook—”
His name comes out in a breathy whimper, your head tipping back against his shoulder, your hand scrambling for purchase over the strong muscle of his forearm, his bicep—anything to keep you grounded.
Because his cock—hot, heavy, throbbing—keeps pressing against your entrance, sliding through the slick mess of your arousal, teasing, toying, like he wants to sink in but can’t bring himself to do it yet.
Like he isn’t ready.
“Shh, baby—” His voice is hoarse, thick with something unreadable. His lips press against your bare shoulder, dragging over your skin, his nose brushing along your throat as he breathes you in. “Just let me—”
His mouth trails lower.
And lower.
Until he reaches your chest.
His arm tightens around your waist as he dips his head, lips finding the curve of your breast, pressing a soft, lingering kiss there before his tongue flicks over your nipple.
And you swear—
It’s not even lustful.
It’s worship.
The way his mouth latches around the sensitive bud, the way his hand cups your other breast, kneading, memorizing, the way he hums against you, like he wants to take his time, like he wants to savor every inch of you.
“Jungkook, please—“
He shudders. You feel it against your spine, the way his breath stutters, the way his hips jerk forward, pressing his length right against where you need him.
“I know, baby,” he murmurs, voice strained, mouth still pressing kisses over the swell of your chest, over your racing heart. “I know—”
And then he grabs your chin. Tilts your head back—forces you to look at him.
That’s his breaking point.
Because the second your glassy eyes meet his, the second he sees the devastation mirrored in them, the reality of it all crashes into him.
And he crumbles. “Fuck—”
A strangled sob rips from his throat as he buries his face in your neck, pressing impossibly closer, hips stuttering as he finally pushes inside.
And then—
You’re both crying.
Sobbing into each other’s skin, moaning between gasps of breath, holding onto one another like it’s the last time.
Because it is.
Jungkook’s hand slides under your neck, cradling it, supporting your head as he tilts your chin back, exposing the vulnerable column of your throat to him. And then—
He pulls you closer.
Flush against him, like he wants to melt into you, fuse your bodies together until there’s nothing separating you anymore.
“Baby—” His voice is broken, wrecked, his breath hot against your skin as he presses his forehead into the back of your head, lips parting against your damp, heated flesh.
And then—
He opens you up.
His hand skims down, trembling fingers slipping between your thighs, urging them wider, needing to feel more of you, needing to bury himself so deep you’ll still feel him even after he’s gone.
And you let him.
You let him spread you open, let him take you, let him push in harder—
Until he’s slamming his hips against you in deep, desperate thrusts, shaking with the force of it, choking on every ragged breath, every shuddering gasp.
And god—
You’re both crying.
Crying into each other’s mouths, into each other’s skin, tears mixing with sweat as you claw at his arms, at the hand cradling your neck, clinging to him, needing him closer, harder, deeper.
“Jungkook—please—”
You don’t even know what you’re begging for anymore.
To stay? To never stop? To love you forever?
But he does.
And it destroys him.
“I don’t wanna go—” he gasps, voice cracking, hips jerking forward as he buries his face in your neck, body shuddering against yours. “Fuck, baby, I don’t—I can’t—”
You feel his tears hot against your skin, feel the way his arms tighten around you like he’s afraid to let go, afraid to leave, and god—
You can’t stop touching him.
Your hands are everywhere—gripping his wrist where it holds your neck, clutching at his forearm, dragging over the sweat-slicked muscle of his thigh, his stomach, memorizing the hard planes of his body the way he’s trying to memorize you.
Because this—
This is all you have left.
Your hands come up—shaking, desperate—gripping his wrists, stopping him from moving.
And then—
You push him.
Jungkook barely has time to catch himself before he’s on his back, chest rising and falling in unsteady gasps as you hover above him, eyes wet, cheeks damp, tears slipping down your chin.
You sniffle, rubbing at them frantically, like if you just wipe them away, maybe this won’t feel so real.
But it is real.
He’s leaving.
And there’s nothing you can do about it.
A broken sob spills from your lips as you lower yourself back down, knees pressing into the mattress, hands trembling as you splay them over his chest—warm, solid, here.
And then—
You nuzzle into his neck.
Curl into him like you’re trying to disappear inside of him, like if you press yourself close enough, maybe you won’t have to let him go.
His hands find your hips, big and steady, guiding you gently—up, down, slow, like he’s trying to lull you, soothe you, even as his own breath shudders with restraint.
“Shh,” he whispers, lips brushing your temple, voice thick, aching.
But you can’t.
You can’t stop crying, can’t stop the way your fingers tangle in his hair, can’t stop the way your lips press to his forehead like you’re trying to imprint the words into him—
“I’ll miss you so much—”
A sharp inhale against your skin.
“I can’t believe you’re leaving me—please, please don’t do this—”
His arms tighten around you, pulling you closer, but it’s not enough.
It’ll never be enough.
You sniffle again, shaking your head, pressing your forehead against his, tears slipping between your lips as you whimper—
“I miss you—”
And Jungkook breaks. Because you say it like he’s already gone.
A strangled noise rips from his throat as his grip on your waist tightens, arms wrapping fully around you, locking you against him as he thrusts up, rolling his hips into yours, trying to chase something he doesn’t know how to hold onto.
“Baby, please—”
His voice cracks, raw, wrecked, and god—
He’s getting harder.
Because he can feel it—the grief, the desperation, the fucking longing—twisting into something unbearable, something that only makes him want you more, love you more, need you more.
“Please don’t say that,” he rasps, burying his face in your shoulder, breath hot, uneven. “I love you so much—so fucking much—”
And then—
He takes over.
Because your pace is faltering, your body trembling from the weight of it all, from the sheer, devastating force of what you’re about to lose.
And Jungkook—
Jungkook can’t let you bear it alone.
But then—
Jungkook pulls you back.
His hands come up—big, warm, trembling—and they cup your face, fingers pressing into the damp skin of your cheeks, thumbs catching stray tears that refuse to stop falling.
You resist.
You don’t want to look at him.
You can’t bear it.
But he won’t let you hide. “Baby—” His voice is a wreck, breathless and broken, and he forces your forehead against his, holds you there, his grip firm but careful, like he’s afraid you might shatter in his hands.
“I love you,” he murmurs, over and over, lips brushing yours with every shaky exhale. “I love you so fucking much, I’ll be back, I swear I’ll be back—”
And you just shake your head, tears slipping onto his skin, slipping between your lips as you sob.
“But you’ll be gone—”
Jungkook squeezes his eyes shut.
“You won’t be here—”
His chest is heaving, his entire body shuddering beneath you, his fingers digging into your skin as you whisper, “I’ll miss this. I’ll miss you.”
And then he breaks. “I know,” he chokes, voice cracking, eyes squeezing shut. “I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry—”
And then—
“Just—just let go for me.”
It’s not a command. It’s a plea.
Because it hurts—
It hurts to feel you like this, to hear you like this, to know that he’s about to leave you like this.
So you do. You let go. You both do.
You scream.
It’s not just pleasure.
It’s everything.
It’s grief and desperation and love and loss, and Jungkook takes it all, swallows it down as his own release rips through him, as he gasps into your mouth, as he lets go right alongside you.
And then—
Then he breathes.
He breathes into your mouth like it’s his only supply of air, like he’s trying to fill you with everything he has left to give.
Like if he breathes deep enough—
Maybe he can stay.
——
Jungkook is still moving inside you.
Barely.
Just these tiny, barely-there thrusts, like he’s trying to soothe you, like he’s trying to lull you down from everything, from the wreckage of it all.
Your sobs have quieted.
You’re just breathing now. Blank, staring past his shoulder, into the dark, your body heavy against him.
And Jungkook hates it.
He rubs a hand down your back, slow and steady, pressing you closer, whispering soft things against your temple—your name, baby, I love you, I’ve got you.
And then, gently— “Baby, can you lift yourself?”
You just shake your head. Barely make a sound, just this tiny, broken grunt that he feels more than hears.
And he laughs.
Sniffles, still recovering, his chest still shaking from the mess of it all, but he laughs—just a little, just enough.
“Okay, okay,” he murmurs, voice thick, and then—
He lifts you.
His cock bends in an uncomfortable way, and he hisses, but it slips out, and he doesn’t care—not about the sting, not about the way you’re leaking onto his stomach, not about anything except the way you nuzzle into his neck like you never want to leave.
And then—
“That was really fucking sad.” Your voice is hoarse, barely above a whisper, but the words cut through the thick, heavy silence, and Jungkook laughs.
Like, actually laughs.
Because, fuck, it really was.
He keeps laughing for a second, shaking his head, still wiping at his face, still recovering, and then—
Then he softens. Then he looks at you, tucking the damp strands of hair away from your face, and says—
“I’m sorry.”
Soft, real.
And then he leans in, kisses your forehead the same way he always does—
The same way that makes your heart ache.
The same way that makes you feel loved.
And you breathe.
You breathe, and you whisper, “I know. I’m sorry for breaking down like that. I don’t know why—”
“No.” Jungkook shakes his head, firm. “No, you’re not the one who should be sorry right now. It’s me.”
And for a second, you don’t say anything.
You just look at him—his wet lashes, his swollen lips, the raw emotion still lingering in his eyes—
And then—
You press a kiss to his forehead.
Just soft. Just gentle.
And Jungkook freezes. Because you’ve never done that before.
His breath catches, his eyes flicker shut, and when he exhales, it’s shaky, but so, so full of warmth. Jungkook doesn’t say anything at first. He just breathes, coming down from the high of you, his fingers absentmindedly tracing patterns on your bare hip, grounding himself in the warmth of your skin.
And then he sees the time.
Shit.
He doesn’t let you notice, though. He forces himself to stay in the moment for a little longer, brushing your hair back, pressing a soft kiss to your temple before he sits up, slipping out of bed.
“Come on, baby,” he murmurs, voice low and raspy. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”
You let him, let him help you into the bathroom, let him be gentle with you. He doesn’t make a big deal out of it, just wets a washcloth and runs it over your skin, his touch careful, reverent. He presses another kiss to your forehead before handing you a fresh pair of clothes.
“Go eat,” he says. “I’ll be out in a sec.”
You don’t argue, slipping into the kitchen while he gathers himself. When he finally comes out, you’re already halfway through your now cold pancakes, sitting on the counter, swinging your legs absentmindedly.
He watches you for a second, committing it to memory.
Then, finally, he checks the time.
Eight. He’s already late.
He sighs, rubbing the back of his neck. “Baby, I gotta go.”
You pause mid-bite, your expression dropping just slightly before you school it into something neutral. “Oh,” you say. “Right.”
Jungkook steps between your legs, hands coming up to hold your face. You lean into his touch immediately, and something about it makes his chest ache.
“You’ll be okay,” he murmurs, thumb brushing over your cheek.
You know he doesn’t just mean tonight.
You nod, forcing a small smile. “You’ll text me?”
“Of course.”
And then he kisses you, slow and lingering, like he’s trying to make it last. Like he wants you to remember.
You will.
Jungkook lingers in the doorway, looking at you like he doesn’t want to leave. Like he’s willing himself to step out, to break the moment before it breaks him.
“I love you,” he says, voice soft.
Your throat tightens. “I love you too.”
He presses one last kiss to your forehead, squeezing your waist before finally pulling away.
“Bye, baby,” he murmurs.
You swallow hard. “Bye.”
And then he’s gone.
The door clicks shut, and you just… stare at it.
You don’t know how long you stay there, sitting on the counter, breakfast forgotten, staring at the empty space where Jungkook just was.
It’s weird.
For the past few months, every single day has had him in it. Whether it was just a text or a call or him physically showing up, he was always there.
And now, in two days, he won’t be.
Your stomach twists, and just as the overwhelming realization starts sinking in—
Your ringtone blares from your bedroom.
You already know who it is before you even check.
You scramble for your phone, pressing it to your ear.
“Hey, bitch, you getting ready?”
You barely have time to answer before your voice wobbles. “Yeah.”
There’s a pause.
“You sound sad,” Nari says suspiciously. “What’s up?”
And then— The floodgates open.
“I don’t want him to go,” you wail, the words tumbling out before you can stop them.
“Oh—”
“I don’t, Nari! I really, really don’t!”
There’s a shuffle on the other end, like she’s sitting up straighter. “Oh, babe…”
You squeeze your eyes shut, pressing a hand to your forehead. “I just— We just—” You suck in a breath, chest aching. “It was so much. It was—” You shake your head, unable to find the words. “It wasn’t just sex, it was—God, I don’t even know how to explain it.”
“Like love?” Nari offers gently.
You let out a watery laugh. “Yeah. Like love.”
She sighs, softer this time. “I know.”
“I can’t believe he’s leaving,” you whisper, staring blankly at your reflection in the mirror. Your mascara is already smudged again. “I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to wake up and not have him here. I don’t want to go back to how it was before—”
“You won’t,” Nari interrupts. “Even if he’s gone for a while, it’s not the same as before. He’s yours now, isn’t he?”
You open your mouth, then close it. Because… is he?
You’ve never said it out loud. Never defined it. But it feels like he is. Right?
“…God, I don’t know anymore,” you groan, rubbing your hands down your face. “I hate him.”
“You don’t,” she says simply.
“Yes, I do.”
“No, you don’t.”
You huff, frustrated. “That’s the problem!”
Nari laughs, and despite everything, you find yourself smiling weakly.
A beat of silence. Then, gently, “You’ll be okay, babe. I promise.”
You take a deep breath, trying to believe her. “I’ve had to redo my mascara, like, seven times.”
She groans. “And you’re gonna redo it an eighth if you keep crying. Now hurry up before our boss has another meltdown.”
You sigh, sniffing one last time. “I hate you.”
“No, you don’t.”
“…No, I don’t.”
“That’s my girl. Love you, bye.”
You close your eyes. “Love you, bye.”
You hang up, taking another deep breath, shaking off the sadness.
Work. You just have to get through work.
You pick up your mascara again. Round eight.
Nari pulls up to your building, glancing at you with a smug grin. You really didn’t wanna get the bus today, so Nari had kindly offered to take you.
“You look pitiful,” she says.
You groan, throwing your head back against the seat. “I literally just was crying, that’s not my fault.”
“No, it’s Jungkook’s.”
You glare at her. “So are you driving me to work, or what?”
She hums, dragging it out, tapping her fingers on the steering wheel. “I don’t know. It’s a lot of effort.”
“Nari.”
“Maybe if you beg.”
You groan. “Pleaseeee, oh my god, you know you were gonna take me anyway—”
She smirks, finally shifting gears. “That’s all I needed to hear.”
“You’re a demon,” you grumble, crossing your arms as she pulls out.
“Yeah, but you love me.”
Unfortunately.
The drive is short, and Nari makes sure to grab your face before you step out, inspecting you like a concerned mother.
“Okay, you look fine. Let’s go.”
You drag yourself inside, already dreading the day.
The morning is slow, as usual. The diner hums with the same familiar sounds—the coffee machines, the occasional chatter, the soft rustling of newspapers from the old man who sits in the corner every morning without fail.
You’re zoning out, trying to will yourself to get back into your normal routine when your phone vibrates in your pocket.
Jungkook [9:14AM]: are you at work rn? you probably are. just checking in.
You bite your lip, quickly typing back.
You [9:15AM]: yeah, just started. slow morning. where are you now?
It doesn’t take him long to reply.
Jungkook [9:15AM]: im close to my parents house now. kinda excited actually. but i miss you.
Your chest tightens a little.
You [9:16AM]: i miss you too.
You keep texting back and forth for a bit—him telling you about his plans for the day, you filling him in on how your boss has already screamed about a missing bag of coffee beans. It feels normal. Comfortable. Like he’s still here.
And for now, you let yourself enjoy that.
#jungkook smut#jungkook x reader#bts smut#jungkook x you#bts#jeon jungkook#bts paved the way#jungkooksmut#kpop#ot7#jungkook angst#jungkook x#jungkook fic#jungkook fanfic#jeongguk x reader#jeon jk#table 3#justarkive#bts jungkook#bts x you#bts fluff#jeon jungguk#jeongguk fic#jeongguk smut#bts jeongguk#jeongguk#jungkook#jungkook fluff#bts army#bts fic
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His True Name
Summary: Not many were curious enough to ask Alucard about his name, except for you.
(The reader is 18+ and is gender-neutral. The ethnicity/race is preferably Black/person of color.)
The sound of the burning wood in the fireplace brought a pleasant peace to the castle. Everyone was in their rooms resting, their bodies tired from cleaning and repairing parts of the castle damaged from past battles. Greta had left to rest hours ago, her body and mind also tired from dealing with the repairs and handling the kids and villagers. She had bid Alucard and you a goodnight and left you both in the living room, enjoying the quietness that had suddenly become rare these days.
You could feel the exhaustion in your body growing by the second, but your mind refused to rest like the others, so you chose to stay up with Alucard, not minding the vampire’s cold but content presence.
“You’re tired,” he stated, sitting on the sofa across from you, his golden gaze sparing you a quick glance before looking back to the fireplace’s flames. “You should go to bed.”
“I know. I can’t sleep, so I’m here. You don’t mind, do you?” You knew the vampire had lived by himself for a long time and assumed that he was naturally just a loner.
“No, not at all. And you don’t need to be nervous.”
“What?”
“I can sense your anxiety whenever I’m around. I don’t know why you’re anxious, but I assure you, I’m no danger to you.”
The anxiety you were feeling was quickly replaced by embarrassment at his words, your cheeks growing warm.
“Sorry. Didn’t mean to make you think I was scared of you or anything. I know you’re not some terrible person or monster-”
“It’s fine. I’m not offended.” He moved his eyes to you again, offering you a small grin that showed a small bit of his fangs.
You quickly gave him a smile, grateful for his politeness before returning your attention to the fireplace, letting yourself become slightly mesmerized by the dance of the flames. His words weren’t a big surprise to you as you had noticed how different Alucard was from others. His gentle personality, his patience, soft speech, and even the way he stands was something that entranced you. You had heard that much of his personality and his demeanor towards humans came from his mother, and you could see it in him everyday.
“Speaking of being offended, can I ask you something?”
He turned his head towards you, letting his silence answer your question for you.
“Your name…Alucard. No offense, but whose bright idea was it for your name to be your father’s name backwards?”
His grin came again and you heard a small huff of amusement leave him before he responded.
“Alucard is not my name. It was given to me.”
“By who?”
He seemed hesitant to answer but answered anyway. “Those who opposed my father... they called me Alucard. I represent everything that is opposite of my father and a sort of savior to the people who survived his wrath.”
Hearing this made you sad. Even though he is the opposite of him, from what you’ve heard, you could tell it must not have been easy for him to have people only see him as the opposite of Dracula, never his own person.
“If it’s not Alucard, then what’s your real name?”
“Adrian.” A content but somewhat dejected smile was upon his face as he said it. “My mother chose it so I could have my own identity.”
“Adrian. That’s nice. Do you want us to call you that instead? Adrian?”
“No, you don’t have to,” he told you, but you could tell that maybe the name, Alucard, was not one he was truly fond of.
“What if I want to,” you asked, turning your attention back to the fire, your exhaustion growing stronger. “Can I call you by your real name?”
“Sure. You can.” Your gaze had left him already, so you were unable to notice the look in his eyes as he said this. Not many ever bothered to question his name or much else about him, usually out of fear that he would be offended or simply because they were uninterested and only saw him as ‘The Sleeping Soldier.’
“Okay, then, Adrian.” You said, smiling.
It was too bad you were human. You had no idea how much his dead heart filled with joy at your use of his true name.
#castlevania#netflix castlevania#alucard#alucard castlevania#Adrian Tepes#castlevania imagine#alucard imagine#Castlevania Alucard imagine#Adrian Tepes imagine#alucard x reader#alucard x black reader#alucard x black!reader#adrian tepes x reader#Adrian Tepes x black reader#adrian tepes x black!reader#alucard x you#alucard x y/n#Adrian Tepes x you#adrian tepes x y/n
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title: all those words hidden in the silence
pairing: kitt azer x (first person reader)
synopsis: you break into the castle for a mission where you may have to assassinate the king but you fancy teasing him a little first… given your history
warnings: swearing, intense-ness
a/n: don’t ask me how or why this idea came to me but it was super fun to write :)) btw the crossed out parts are to represent her ‘forbidden’ thoughts
taglist: @fleuriosa @midiosaamor @whatsamongus @zaraaaabear @lovethornes @emelia07 @sweetreveriee @userxs-blog @anintellectualintellectual @off-to-the-r4ces @hermesenthusiast
“Pretty night for a murder don’t you think,” I grin, swinging my dagger between my fingers nonchalantly.
The king turns around. The look of shock on his face leaves me satisfied but like any addiction, a part of me craves more. I watch as he slowly pales when he meets my eyes. I wasn’t sure he could pale any more, he looks like he hasn’t eaten in days. The king is weak. Perfect.
“Very pretty,” he muses, keeping on the diplomatic mask he’s crafted for himself, “the blood will match your new outfit.”
“Taking notes about what I wear now?” I raise an eyebrow, approaching him slowly. My steps long and swift, almost a glide. I watch as his Adam’s apple bobs in his neck as he swallows and wonder if he’s nervous.
“Don’t flatter yourself,” he sighs with a blank stare, “it’s just a change from seeing you in rags, did that little seamstress friend of our silver saviour sew it for you?”
He hits a nerve and he knows it as the corner of his mouth turn up to form malicious smirk. I want to rip it off of his cruelly beautiful face and tear each part into a million pieces of nothingness. So he can finally be the nothing he made her.
“You murdered Adena,” I growl, not bothering to hide my burning rage. Unlike the king, I’m not a fan of wearing a mask. I don’t play pretend, I don’t mess about, I’m real.
He dares to take a step closer to me, “she was collateral damage.”
“Why don’t I make you collateral damage?” I snarl, gripping tighter to my dagger. My knuckles turn white.
“It’s my talent sweetheart,” he tells me, “I’d be careful if I were you.”
His green eyes blaze with a synthetic fierceness. I laugh, throwing my head back and holding my stomach. He’s taken off guard and stares at me in bewilderment.
“Oh sorry,” I snort, trying to pull myself together, “it’s just hilarious to me that you think you’ll be doing the killing tonight.”
“I wouldn’t get so giggly sweetheart,” he murmurs, getting closer still, looming over me to cast his cowardly shadow, “you know I could if I wanted to.”
“No I don’t actually, you’ve had countless opportunities to do it,” I scoff, “so tell me, brave king, noble king, why haven’t you killed me yet?”
He paralyses for a second and I have the golden opportunity to end him right there. Lunge forwards and impale him with my handmade dagger. Watch the blood leak from his lifeless body. See as the last flicker of light leaves those hypnotising emerald eyes. But I don’t. I don’t do it and I don’t know why.
“You know why,” he whispered, sending a shiver down my spine. It’s like he’s answering both the question in my head and the one I had said aloud.
I quirk my eyebrow upwards and fold my arms, I won’t let him do this to me, he can’t play the vulnerable card before I do, “do I?” I ask.
“Are you going to make me say it?” he murmurs so quietly I can hear my heart thumping my chest, “is that what you want from me?”
So it’s true. He still loves me like I love him. And he won’t kill me because of it. Good. I have an advantage.
“Are you brave enough to say it?” I mumbled, tilting my face upwards to really look at him.
He’s still my Kitt. I can see past his pretence, far past it. I always have been able to. And even with his tired eyes and hollowed cheeks, colder gaze and harsher tone, beneath all of that he’s the boy I used to know. The boy I fell for in too many ways. The boy who was vulnerable with me. The boy who I was vulnerable with.
“I have guards posted on every door,” he diverts the conversation, “how did you get past them?”
I get the answer to my previous question. He is not brave enough to admit it. He’s still a coward then.
“Wouldn’t you like to know,” my lips draw into a thin smile.
“You know I could have you killed in an instant,” he muses, “my guards will obey my every wish, it wouldn’t be me to do it.”
He won’t call them. I already know it. But I’ll play his game, as tedious as manipulation is it serves well in the end.
“Too bad you won’t be able to reach them,” I shrug softly.
His face hardens, “what did you do?”
I don’t reply, staring at my nails to prove my disinterest. He tries calling for them, for help, for anyone. I yawn and roll my eyes. They won’t come. They don’t come. I see a flicker of rage in his eyes, a furious spark ignites somewhere inside of him. At least he looks less like a dead man walking when angry, at least now he had passion about something.
“What did you do!” he yells, his booming voice remaining me of his father, making me feel a little queasy.
“Demanding me isn’t going to make me tell you,” I say fiercely, “I’m not one of your subject Kitty.”
He flinches at the nickname. It’s like a reflex he has no control over. The mask cracks slightly. Whoops.
He glares at me, regaining his pathetic royal composure, the facade that is everything but him, “where’s my brother?”
“I don’t know,” I say.
“Yes you do,” he insists.
“No I don’t,” I exclaimed.
“TELL ME!” he screams, madly clawing at my arms, pinning me to the wall behind us.
My back hits it with an awkward thump. Pain rolls across my body and I bite my lip. He has me at the wrists, forcing me to drop my beloved dagger. Our faces are so close they nearly touch. I wonder if he can see the scar on my left eyebrow, the one he gave me. I don’t tear my gaze from his and for what feels like hours he stare at each other panting like exhausted dogs. His hands slowly drop my wrists and trail gently down my face. I’ve missed his touch. They reach my neck and in a sudden jerky movement he clasps his hands around it. I gasp, he smiles something blazing in his eyes. He’s hungry to witness my pain. Shame he’ll have to starve tonight.
“Go on,” I murmur, “strangle me, do it, I dare you.”
He breathes heavily, looking into my eyes like he used to after all those times we’d kissed. A mix of emotions rise into my chest, a bittersweet mixture of all I want to forgot. Part of me thinks it might be worth dying, if it’s at his hands.
“You can’t,” I whisper, “can you?”
“What do you want?” he asks hoarsely, dropping his arms and taking a step back. Disappointment hits my stomach. I didn’t want him to let go.
“Oh honey,” I say, strutting past him, “there’s a long list.”
“Tell me what you want,” he walks infront of me, stopping my tracks, “and I will let you walk out of here alive.”
“You won’t kill me either away,” I say, “what good is that promise?”
“Don’t be so sure,” Kitt says, “I might not do it myself but there are others who will. So what do you want?”
“At this current moment,” I ask, taking a step closer to him so I can feel him breathe.
He nods, “name it.”
“I want your blood,” I whisper, pushing him down harshly onto a chair, “on my dagger, your cold lifeless body in my arms,” I say, your lips on my lips I don’t.
A ghost of a smile haunts his empty features, as he grabs my chin, “you’re a pretty liar, but not a good enough one.”
“Do you want to test me?” I ask, straddling him so I’m sat on his lap. For the plan to work I need to be a distraction, that’s all this is, I reassure myself. I ignore the fact that I want to be in this position.
“Tell me this makes you feel nothing,” he says in a low voice, running his soft hands up my thighs and then up to the small of my back where he holds me like I’m weightless, like I’m a dancer.
I gasp sharply. All my oxygen stolen by a thief with emerald eyes. The same theif who stole my heart.
“Look me in the eye and tell me this makes you feel nothing,” he repeats again.
I can’t do it. And he knows it. This makes me feel more than I’ve felt in a long time. I open my mouth to reply but two rough unfamiliar sets of hands grab my arms. I look behind to see two guards on me.
Kitt grins, something cruel in his smirk make my heart ache, “two can play at the manipulation game sweetheart,” he says.
Sweetheart. My toes curl at the thought of being his sweetheart. I want to kick myself and then sob in a heap. I’d let my guard down again. I’d been vulnerable again. I’d let myself take it all as one big joke again. He wasn’t my Kitt anymore and I was naive to think he could be. I’d failed the mission, I’d failed to kill him, I’d failed to manipulate him, I’d failed to play it smart.
He just stands there, over me, crown looking too heavy for his head. I hate that look he’s giving me. I attempt to lunge at him but the guards’ grip is too strong and I’m held back. He’s still smirking at me. I spit in his face.
“Aren’t you beautiful when you’re angry,” he taunts, unbothered by my undignified behaviour.
I’d been so cocky before. How stupid did I look now?
“Fuck you Kitt,” I shout, a rawness in my voice that I didn’t recognise.
He chuckles, “not so sarcastic now are we?”
“I’m going to kill you,” I look at him, a dead seriousness set in my expression.
“That’s what you came here to do though and as it happens I’m not dead,” he shrugs at me. I wish his eyes weren’t so pretty to stare at.
“They’ll end you Kitt,” I tell him, “they’re planning to end you.”
Am I threatening him or am I warning him? I can’t tell anymore. My mind is too conflicted to decide.
“And I will destroy every last one until there’s just you and I,” he murmurs, before standing up and issuing his kingly orders, “take her to a holding cell boys.”
a/n: thanks for reading 🤍🤍 I promise more of my req fic will be posted soon
powerless masterlist
#bella writes 🤍#powerless fics#powerless oneshot#kitt powerless#powerless lauren roberts#kitt azer#kitt azer x reader#powerless#powerless fic#reckless lauren roberts#lauren roberts#kitt azer x y/n#kitt azer x you#kitt azer oneshot#kai azer x paedyn gray#kaipaedyn
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Okay so this is me talking about everything that is wrong with Double Exposure because my first post about it was an angry reaction at the pricefield breaking up news and it wasn’t really diving into it. Obviously don’t read this if you haven’t played the game and do not want to get spoiled. Also, this is going to be long.
First of all, what I really want to speak about and what a lot of people are refusing to accept is how painfully out of character Max is throughout the whole game. “Yeah but she’s ten years older—” Don’t care. That doesn’t mean her entire personality has to change. I’ll say it over and over again, 2014 Max Caulfield would have absolutely despised her adult version. The thing that bugs me the most about 2024 Max Caulfield is how careless she is with her powers. She’s not asking herself where they came from, she doesn’t even freak out, or actually care. In the first game, right after she first rewinds, she constantly has to remind herself that she isn’t dreaming, and that this is real. In this game, she just accepts it, and goes on with her day, and uses her powers for the most useless reasons possible. What about the Max from her nightmare who represents the guilt she felt for using her powers wrong and putting all of those people in danger, you say? Absolutely forgotten. Max uses her powers so she can find items easier and so the people who rejected her in her main timeline want her in the other one. (Yes, after Chloe breaks up with her and expresses her worries about the fact that Max — apparently — uses her powers so things go her way — which is already incredibly out of character, because no, 2014 Max wouldn’t have used her powers on Chloe to avoid conflict, especially after what happened.) That is incredibly manipulative and shitty. SHE WOULDN’T FUCKING SAY THAT. And also, why on Earth would she try and use her powers to avoid her friend’s death when she KNOWS where this is leading. Did she not learn anything from the past? Apparently, she didn’t! And proceeded to completely forget about it all.
Something else that is incredibly annoying and gets tiring after like ten minutes is the amount of awkward sex-related jokes that Max (and every character, somehow) keeps making at any given moment. Pretty sure this was supposed to show us that Max is an adult now and that she hangs out with adults and knows what sex is but that is way too much. Nobody talks like that in real life (and if I ever meet someone who does I’m leaving the conversation). Max also makes cringey jokes all the time, because her dialogue (and hers only, which makes it sound even weirder) is the same as the 2014 one, except it was 2014 back then and it was acceptable. Now, if Max Caulfield says ‘let’s trash, shakabrah’, you’re only making it obvious how much fan-service you filled this game with. It would be funny if she said it to Chloe, because then it would have sounded like an inside joke, except she says it to her new lame love interest who has no idea what she’s talking about, and just. Why. Why would she, Deck Nine. The main problem about the fact that those jokes are thrown at us all the time is that Max’s inner dialogue is almost only focused on them. Something traumatic happens to her? Who cares. She’s gotta make a joke about the rock you pick up and then bring to another universe’s lame love interest who’s gonna reject her anyway and say ‘I’ll never apologize for my dad jokes’ because apparently, we’re never seeing the end of the fan-service in this game.
Chloe is out of character too the only few times we hear of her, but that’s only because Deck Nine makes it obvious how much they despise her. She leaves Max through a very underwhelming letter, which is already out of character enough. She then proceeds to never reach out for years (which is something Max has done to her and that has hurt her, so why the fuck would she do the same thing right after?) And apparently, she doesn’t care. She just moves on, and parties, and kind of starts flirting with Max’s high school bully, and makes cringey posts on the Internet that make her sound like an extremely corny player. That isn’t Chloe Price. That’s someone Chloe Price would make fun of, at most. I kept picturing 2014 Chloe reading the things her adult self apparently posts on social media and freeze in terror. Genuinely. Also, the whole ‘Joyce is dead and Chloe is angry at Max for it’. Sigh. Chloe gave Max the choice. She said ‘you’re the only one who can (make this choice)’. And then, when Max choses her, in front of her, and lets the town get blown away, Chloe says ‘I’ll always be with you’. Why the sudden switch up? Never explained. Chloe is just angry at Max for something she originally wasn’t angry at her for.
The writing in this game is super weak, too. There are a few cool scenes (I’m thinking the one where Safi tells Max to pulls the trigger in the middle of the storm, if you manage to make it past how boringly similar to LiS 1 it feels), but it’s mostly just…meh, at most. For instance, Safi asks Max about Chloe, we learn that Chloe and Max broke up, or that Chloe died, and then without giving us any time to process that, the game forces us to friendzone or flirt with some random girl that is apparently into Max. We don’t have any time to decide if we like her or not, you just take a look at her and decide if Max wants her. The dialogues are more often than not awful too. It sounds like something ChatGPT would write. Nearly every single interaction Max can have with basically anyone feels forced, and like people talk too much, or not enough, people say random thing that makes no sense and nobody cares, we suddenly hear Max’s thoughts in a middle of a conversation, there are awkward moments of silence. Painful to witness. Max has NO chemistry with either of her love interests (though the guy is somehow more interesting than the girl to interact with), and manages to have more romantic moments with her best friend who she’s not supposed to be into than with them. Both those love interests are useless and suck anyway, because they will both end up rejecting Max by the end anyway, and apparently won’t even return, which strikes the question of why the romantic plot lines were even involved. (Which also made me hate Amanda a lot. I guess she is somewhat likable at the beginning of the game, but she gradually becomes annoyingly pushy and ends up telling Max she’s too much to deal with at the end of the game anyway). Also, it’s annoying how obvious it is that the romantic plot line is way more explored with Amanda than it is with Vihn. Stop making Max look like she’s basically a lesbian but not completely because she hooks up with guys sometimes. Stop bisexual erasure, basically.
The game gives up on its own plot in the middle of it. It was promoted as a murder mystery but stop being one after a while to become a What The Hell Is Going On With Safi kind of thing. Also, there’s the whole thing with the detective. Why did they even create him only to treat him as a joke and never explain what happened with him. One of the most confusing thing about this game. What the hell was that for.
The nightmare sequence. God, how I hate it. If you want to deal with Max’s trauma, do it WELL. It’s a go big or go home thing, not a ‘let’s put some sort of references but never properly deal with anything’. IT WAS SO FRUSTRATING. There’s references about Chloe everywhere, and never Chloe. I get it, you don’t want her to be in this game. But if you do want to talk about Max’s trauma, you gotta swallow your pride and put her somewhere anyway. Max can’t have a nightmare about the things that traumatized her without Chloe being there. It just makes it even more obvious how much the studio avoided to put her in the game on purpose. The bathroom scene? God, please, what the fuck was that. Why would Max think of herself as some kind of Nathan Prescott parallel?? The only thing they had in common was pointing a gun at someone. That’s it. That was another poor attempt of the game to try and not put Chloe there but still say ‘look!! Max still thinks about her and is traumatized!! But she somehow dreams about it without seeing her face once!!’ like just stop. And the Dark Room part felt very underwhelming too. Kudos to Hannah Telle for the amazing voice acting on this, but the scene lasted ten seconds. Just don’t put it there, please.
The nightmare isn’t needed in every LiS game. So isn’t the Storm. So aren’t the nosebleed. Why does Diamond get nosebleed because of her powers? That was a Max thing. Daniel didn’t get nosebleed, Alex didn’t get nosebleed, Chris didn’t get nosebleed. (Rachel didn’t get nosebleed either). Why is this suddenly something everybody get because of their powers?? And why do every powers suddenly create Storms. It’s not a common Powers Problem, it was a Rewind Powers thing. God, this makes me mad.
And last but not least. The final choice. It felt so??? Underwhelming??? I use this word a lot, but it’s how the whole game feels for me. The LiS choices are hard to pick. There’s no morally wrong or right answer. It depends on who you are, what you stand for. The first game was about learning how to let go or refuse to let your friend get ruined by fate. The second game was about giving your life up for your brother to have a chance or refusing to give up on what you believe in and what makes you who you are, no matter what. Before the Storm was about protecting your loved ones from the truth or refusing to lie to them and let them hurt. True Colors was about forgive the unforgivable in the name of compassion or hold a grudge in the name of family.
And then there’s this game. ‘Do you wanna join the X-men me and my team of supervillains and take over the world lol’. Why would Max say yes to that. Just why. If you want to play the game in character, it’s obvious that you have to pick ‘refuse’. If you want to play an out of character evil Max just for the sake of it because it’s fun, alright! I don’t blame you. It’s fun. But why on Earth would Max Caulfield agree.
Also, they take you for an idiot with the cat content. Do NOT waste your money on it, you will regret it.
Anyway. This game would’ve been okay if it hadn’t been apart of the LiS franchise, and if it had starred a different main character. I still would’ve thought it was confusing and generally not great, but at least it wouldn’t have felt like such a let down. (Side note: everything I’ve said doesn’t include Moses and Gwen. I want to put them in my pocket and carry them around with me forever. Love them a lot.)
And congratulations if you’ve read this far. I probably would’ve gone ‘I ain’t reading allat’ and scrolled
#life is strange#lis#max caulfield#life is strange double exposure#lis de#life is strange double exposure spoilers#nobody’s reading all that but oh well#at least i got it out of my system
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Back to black
John Egan X Pilot! Reader
Summary: The relationship of Y/n and Bucky when they're both at their lowest.
Warning: Toxic relationship/ manipulation/ cheating/ mention of sex/ swearing/ use of Y/n/ abuse of alcohol/
Word count: 1.2k
He left no time to regret
Kept his dick wet
With his same old safe bet
Me and my head high
And my tears dry
Get on without my guy.
Their relationship was toxic, they would fight and make-up all the time. Their arguments would always end up with them being naked in the bed. She was a female pilot; he was a pilot too. They were on the same base, so they always saw each other. Some of the other pilots grew tired of them always fighting, but no matter what happened, they’d still be in love with the other, they were addicted to the thrill and the highs and lows of their relationship. It distracted them from the horror they saw all the time, the sex was an occasion to let everything out, it was often raw and real, they tried to get a grip on reality. But when he drank, he could be really mean. Y/n tried to get out of the situation, but she was like a drug addict, always needing more. So, she would cry in her room, her tears represented all the things she couldn’t have with him; a walk in a park, slow dancing together, going on dates and having deep conversations with him. She had to face the fact that the relationship she was in wasn’t the one her mother described, it was the one her father warned her about.
You went back to what you knew
So far removed
From all that we went through
And I tread a troubled track
My odds are stacked
I'll go back to black.
‘’What do you mean you’re going to London?’’ she asked as she looked at him packing his bags. ‘’I need a break from all this, I need to drink, to get out of here!’’ he said, putting his shirt in his bag. He was going to drink in London, getting back to his old coping habit, or he was going to find another woman to have sex with, his ladies-men reputation was well known by the woman. ‘’Right, cause running away is easier than stay and talk about your feelings’’ she chuckled, but it was filled with anger in her voice. He clenched his jaw as she gritted her teeth. There it was, the anger building up in her stomach, she wanted to punch the wall, choke him and hit him, but she contained herself, like always. ‘’I’m going to London, so whatever you say, won’t change my mind’’ he mumbled, with hint of frustration in his voice. Talking to him was useless, he was going to get drunk, probably going to cheat on her, come back with flowers and do it all again. She felt her throat squeeze, she didn’t want to cry in front of him. ‘’Why did I come here, anyway.’’ She whispered. Bucky looked up at her. ‘’Have fun in London, you know where to find me when you come back. Or I’ll probably be rotting in a potato field in Germany, enjoy your weekend, John’’ she said as she slammed his door. The idea of her being dead didn’t sit well in his mind, but he needed to get out of here, he was starting to lose his mind.
We only said goodbye with words
I died a hundred times
You go back to her
And I go back to
I go back to us.
She coiled up against her door, crying again. They had a fight, she looked at the letter in her hands. A woman named Lexie wrote to him; saying how much she enjoyed the night they spent together in London, and it went on with details of their steamy night. He cheated on her many times before, but it was never confirmed, now, to hold a letter, she felt like her heart was shattering with each word she read. Tears fell on the paper as she continued to read it. Bucky could hear her cry when he entered the building, since she was a woman on a base filled with men, her and the other woman had a private building. He knew that she was crying because of him. She thought she was dying, her heart was painful, each breath she took was hurting her lungs, her head was pounding from all the crying. It wasn’t the first time she ‘died’ it happened multiple times before. When he knocked at her door, he didn’t expect her to open it that fast. ‘’What the fuck do you want?’’ she tried to yell, but her voice cracked, showing all the pain she was in. ‘’Darling, I’m truly sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you, I feel so fucking bad right now, please let me in’’ he pleaded. She didn’t have any energy to fight with him, she let him inside her room, he closed the door, slowly, as he looked at her. She looked so tired, in pain and hurt. ‘’I know you won’t forgive me, and I’ve said it before, but this time, I promise you that I truly fucking mean it, she meant nothing. It’s really hard for me to talk about my feelings, I was about to go crazy, the second I kissed her I regretted it. Y/n, please look at me’’ she didn’t want to hear him, but he sounded so sincere. ‘’How do I know this time is different?’’ she whispered. ‘’I don’t know what to tell you, but I swear on everything I have, I’m going to change, no more messing around, I love you, and I can’t keep hurting you.’’ His eyes filled with tears. ‘’Y/n, I love you and I’m begging you, please you have to believe me, you can ask Buck, I’ve thrown away all my alcohol, and I – ‘’ Y/n cut him off, placing her hands on his. ‘’Just shut up and kiss me’’ she said, her voice filled with pain, again. Bucky kissed her, putting his both hands on her cheek. He tenderly kissed her lips. ‘’I love you so much’’ he praised between kisses.
She didn’t know if that promise was true, but she was going to take whatever he was willing to give, because they needed each other, one couldn’t live without the other. The adrenaline, the love; they craved each other. So whatever he gave her, she was going to take it, or she was going back to black…
#john bucky egan#john egan x reader#major john egan#john egan#john egan imagine#master of the air imagine#master of the air#callum turner#callum turner x reader#Spotify
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Can we have a yandere who fell in love with reader because she was quiet and gave off the air of some sort of elegant princess or something while also being kind (because she'd look out for the people around her without expecting anything in return, and that includes him. And him being the oily haired, awkward, friendless little freak he is couldn't help but latch onto her), but when he starts stalking her/befriends her (or both), he learns that she's actually really fucking talkative and highkey autistic? As in, stims a lot (constantly fiddling with objects, making strange noises, clapping, shaking her head or the classic, flapping her hands) or info-dumping or poor regulation of vocal volume because he finds her at a point where she's relaxed and no longer masking!
And I say "she" or princess", but if you so please, you can definitely make it gender neutral. I just use feminine pronouns because I'm a girl.
I'm hesitant to write this request though since some authors are hesitant to write neurodivergent characters if they have no prior knowledge, so it's okay to ignore this request <3 I completely understand the discomfort of writing something so unfamiliar. Or, you don't necessarily have to diagnose reader with anything, and simply write them off as someone that acts vastly different when they're relaxed and is free from judgement.
If it's not obvious, I'm an autistic mascot🥰 (dubbed by my friend, lol).
I was going to do this anonymous but then I realised that cringe is dead and I've requested for worse things. Shyent represents!!!
Also, is it embarrassing that I made 2 requests in a day? But then again, how many of y'all are making several requests anonymously🤨
But also, I talk too much!! So additionally, hi, you like jazz? (what's your favourite song this month)
...Atp, you should actually just ignore me.
i love hearing people yap like this lowk lit my soul up a bit like this is so cool of you. you’re epic. 😾
my favourite song this month… ‘nope youre too late i already died’. obsessed with it from the moment it was released last month and after his suicide. literally crazy oh my days, i was so heartbroken </3 rip wifi skeleton. ❤️🩹 🕊️
cringe doesn’t exist, i have a fucking yandere blog i genuinely do not judge people at all. PLEASEEE never be shy with requests like i promise you i love hearing the amazing ideas people come up with. and when i tell you waaah this one filled me with joy.
i’m all too pleased to write about an autistic character! …i am… also… autistic! 😂 boo! did the autism scare you! 😂
okay that was genuinely so unfunny it feels like an inside joke but it’s not idk what possessed me to write that oh my days yk that trend where people think autism is all cool and silly, yeah.
on a real note, i received my diagnosis years ago and oh lord 🤦🏾♀️. living hell. i’ve become a lot more comfortable being myself and i don’t see it as a negative thing at all. gives me an excuse to use my special interest as a reason for excessive merch and i adore info dumping. autism definitely isn’t the ‘funsies’ that a lot of shitty social media pages try to make it seem like, but i could never see it as anything less than a blessing either. <3
anyways ahahshs corny rant im so tired im deadass gonna crash ill try to have this out tmrw. bonne nuit.💝
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summary: hoseok worries about y/n burning herself out again and jumps at the chance to help improve her dance skills for her groups comeback so she doesn't get sick again
warnings: mentions of burning out, fainting, breakdowns, depression and su!c!dal thoughts
pairing: fem! idol! reader x jung hoseok
genre: angst, fluff
face claim: no one
author note: n/n means nickname. y/n is also a “bad” dancer, so if you’re good, i’m sorry but you’re gonna have to pretend that you’re “bad”.
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦ ✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦
y/n breathed heavily while staring into the mirror. she couldn’t remember how long she’s been in the practice room for, but it felt like ages. her members had already left while she stayed back in hopes of improving and not standing out as the groups “dance hole”. in the eyes of her company, she wasn’t bad, but fans think the complete opposite. every comeback, y/n worked herself until she collapsed, she needed to prove to them that she’s just as good as her members; but, every comeback was filled with the same negative comments about her dancing.
“y/n is so bad bro 😭😭 kick her out atp”
“why do they even have her move to the centre when she can’t dance?”
“it’s so obvious they’re only keeping her for her ( vocals / visuals )”
y/n read them all. they thought she wouldn’t see them, but she does.
y/n was broken out of her thoughts at hearing her phone ringing. she tiredly walked towards her bag and sat down with a groan, everything hurt, but she couldn’t stop.
[ incoming call from… ☀️💜 ]
“hoseok?” she mumbled out before answering
they had only been dating for a few months and in order to not get caught, y/n made sure to put emojis as his contact. their companies were aware of the relationship and warned them about being careful, especially y/n as she’s a junior and her group isn’t even close to being as big as his. they were worried about the backlash and thoughts of netizens thinking she had seduced him and was just using him to make herself and her group more popular.
“n/n!” she tried to smile at hearing his voice, but couldn’t bring herself to. she was just so tired.
“hi, hobi” concern washed over him as he heard her voice
“did i wake you?”
“no, no. just practicing, the usual, you know?” she slumped down onto the floor and released a breath at feeling the cold wood on her sweaty body
“you shouldn’t practice so hard. you’ll get sick again” his reminder made her look at herself into the mirror
she had gone on hiatus a while ago because of her deteriorating mental health and he had been the main person that looked after her since her group was busy promoting. y/n didn't want to see her family during it, she felt embarrassed for letting such negativity get to her and make her feel like she should end everything: they were harmless comments, they didn't know better, right? they were just saying things to hurt her, they didn't actually mean it… or so she tried to convince herself. hoseok understood what she felt, though the negative comments about them have been significantly different, he knew how to deal with what she was feeling and y/n couldn't help but fall in love with him even more.
hoseok represented the sun, and she the moon. his bright smile and positive words helped y/n feel better, although it did take her a while to understand that he wasn't doing it just because it might be a requirement due to them dating, but he actually cared about her. a lot of tears were shed and they both had to repeat their words as they couldn't understand the other through their sobbing, but y/n slowly managed to feel okay again.
"can you help me?" she asked softly
"of course!"
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦ ✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦
the phrase “practice makes perfect” has always stuck with y/n, but no matter how much hoseok helped her, she just couldn't get certain moves right. her body didn't bend in the same way her members or his did and she hated it — it just made her stick out even more.
"it's alright, you still have time" he eased her worries as she sat between his legs with her back pressed against his chest. they weren't worried about anyone seeing them as the door was locked and the window that was on the door had a curtain that he could pull down
"the others should be here soon, do you want to watch us?" y/n felt rather intimated about meeting the other members and hoseok understood as he was once in her position so he never pushed y/n into meeting them. however, his enlistment date was growing closer and the youngest four were rather noisy about wanting to meet her before he left as they knew she wouldn't interact with them otherwise. hoseok also wanted them to meet her and potentially take care of y/n while he was away in case anything happened and her own members weren't with her
"sure" he perked up and hugged her tightly making y/n laugh
one by one they came into the practice room and each of them froze at the doorway upon seeing hoseok coddling y/n who was embarrassed with showing such affection around others. they were use to him being strict during their own practices, but he was so soft with her.
jungkook felt very offended.
“she’s my girlfriend, of course i treat her better” he rolled his eyes as jungkook gasped dramatically, y/n looked between the two as they reminded her of two of her own members
throughout the practice, y/n sat against the wall and just watched. she knew they were human and could make mistakes, but seeing them shocked her a little. y/n saw them as bts: her seniors and one of the biggest korean idol groups to ever exist. it was strange yet oddly comforting?
mistakes are made and they laugh it off. y/n remembered when she did that too. once she tripped over herself and fell onto the floor which made her members burst out laughing before asking if she was okay. as trainees, all of them were rather sensitive and wanted to be perfect, but nowadays ( stan ) they didn’t judge her and reminded y/n that she wouldn’t have debuted if the company truely believed she was such an awful dancer like the internet said.
“practice makes perfect” they say. y/n has always been determined to become a better dancer and prove everyone wrong, but this time she’s going to work on doing it without burning herself out and making everyone worried
“hoseok” she called out to her boyfriend softly as he sat beside her in silence, the other boys were spread out and in their own worlds as he hummed and looked at her
“thanks” he tilted his head in confusion before asking what she meant
“for everything” she kissed his cheek softly which earned a loud gag from jimin, but they both ignored him
“i’m going to go home. practice with me, tomorrow?” he beamed and nodded happily before leaning in to kiss her
a shoe was thrown which made them jump apart and a loud; “GET A ROOM” echoed through the practice room. hoseok glared before getting up to chase after the younger members who ran out of the practice room.
#bts#jung hoseok#bts hoseok#hoseok x reader#hoseok x y/n#jhope#j hope#bts hobi#bangtan hobi#bts jhope#j hope bts#jhope x reader#bangtan jhope#j hope x reader#j hope imagine#jung hoseok imagine#bts imagine#bts one shot#Hobi one shot#hobi imagine#hoseok x you#hoseok imagine#jhope imagine#j hope x y/n#jhope x y/n#j hope x you#jhope x you#hobi x you#hobi x y/n#hobi x reader
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Your Person
Bobby Goren X neurodivergent F!reader
Summary: Bobby has spent most if his life feeling like he didn't belong, that it wasn't possible for him to connect with someone the way everyone else does, that is until me meets you, his person.
Warnings: Cannon level violence and language. So much fluff, love and acceptance. mentions of Panic, anxiety and death/dying. Minimal use of Y/N. Very little physical description of reader
Authors note: This is story was a labor of love and my love letter to Bobby Goren and the way Vincent D'Onofrio played him. I've never connected with or seen myself represented in a character the way I do with Bobby Goren. I dont think you need to of seen Law and Order: Criminal Intent to enjoy this story.
The midsummer sun shinned down on Bobby’s face as he walked to the coffee shop. The sun feels similar to warmth that spreads throughout his chest whenever he sees you. The smile you always give him. God that smile. It’s different than the smile you give everyone else around you.
He can’t help but smile thinking about the day you met. How flustered and embarrassed you were when you’d run into him causing his coffee to spill everywhere. How he felt something tug In his chest when your big hazel eyes looked into his when you realized it spilled on him. He wanted to wrap his arms around you and tell you it was ok when it was clear you were prepared to be yelled at.
Bobby knew the moment he started falling for you. He tried to fight it at first because it scared the shit out of him. Pretty much resigning to the fact that he’d always be alone. His job was demanding, which was hard for a lot people to deal with. So he had stopped entraining anything that wasn’t serious. He wanted someone to share a life with, someone that would accept him, quarks and all. So he didn’t want to waste what little free time he had with someone who only wanted sex.
As he dips into the cafe the cashier greets him with a tired smile.
“Welcome in, just to let you know we close in 10 minutes”
“No problem, I’ll have a large coffee cream and sugar”
“Oh, Ah is (y/n) in today?”
“Umm I’m going to grab the owner” she replies eyeing him suspiciously.
Bobby doesn’t blame her, she doesn’t know him, he hasn’t been in, in about a month. She’s doing the safe thing by getting someone.
“Hey, theres this guy out front that I’ve never seen before asking for Y/N”
“Ok, I’ll go up and check it out. Why don’t you start your end of day tasks”
Stacey makes her way to the front to see who’s asking for you. She’s very happy to see it’s Bobby, the one person you’ve really taking a liking too since he started coming in.
“Hey Bobby, sorry about that”
“It’s no problem, I know she was just being safe, doing the right thing”
“She’s here, back in her usual spot doing some ordering on her laptop” Stacey says as she hands him his coffee.
“I wont stay long, I know your trying to close up”
“You’re welcome to stay as long as you want. She’ll be really happy to see you, but you didn’t hear that from me” Stacey chuckles.
She’ll be happy to see me?
Bobby is rounding the corner into the seating area at the exact moment you happen to look up from your laptop.
The way you light up sends a sea of warmth crashing against his chest. He waves awkwardly and you return the wave.
“Hi” he say unable to contain the smile dancing across his face.
“Bobby! Hi. You’re alright?” The smile creeps across your face.
“What do you mean I’m alright?” He asks tilting his head to the side to watch your expression as he sits.
Fuck. You can feel your skin heating up as you pull your eyes down too your laptop.
He realizes by your reaction that he sounded accusatory when he didn’t mean too.
“I didn’t mean for that to sound that way”
“I didn’t mean anything by it, it’s just been a while since I’d seen you in…uh not that I expect you to come in. I know you’re busy. I um just was worried when it had been a while.” At this point youre face is on fire, you’re making an absolute fool of yourself with your word vomit.
She worries about me
“We’ve had several intense cases back to back. We pretty much were working around the clock. Only went home to sleep. Not that I was really sleeping either.” He says studying you intently, trying desperately to figure out if you feel the palpable connection that’s between the two of you.
“I wish I’d know, I would have brought some stuff from the cafe down for you and your partner.”
“That’s really very sweet of you”
“It’s not like you come in everyday, but regularly enough that I just thought something might of happened to you in the line of duty” you say without thinking, almost like you’d forgotten you were talking to him.
Bobby tilts his head trying to look at your face.
“You really were worried about me. I didn’t mean to worry you”
The realization crashing down on you like a brick. Fuck. I really said that out loud.
“I ah. Man I’m saying a lot of things. I’m sorry I’m trying not to be weird. Didn’t really mean to say that out loud” you say dragging your hands down your face as you pull your eyes up to find him already looking at you.
His deep brown eyes are soft, his smile kind as he watches you.
“No it’s not like that. It’s nice to know someone’s worried about me.”
“I’m sure lots of people are worried about you, you’re pretty awesome.”
OH MY GOD. I need to stop talking. What the hell am I doing. This man is not interested in my flattery. Where is literally anyone to cut into this conversation to save me from myself.
Just then as if you materialized her yourself you notice Stacey over Bobby’s shoulder coming towards the two of you.
“Did our girl over here tell you she’s testing out some new recipes for the bakery case? And that she’s knocking it out of park?”
“No she didn’t, she must of forgotten to tell me how much of a badass she is.”
Your face is beat read at that point, meanwhile the both of them are smiling ear to ear talking about you.
“Yea she’s like that, she’s too modest really. I tell her all the time she needs to brag about her pastries more often”
“Man you two are quiet the pair today” you laugh
“Besides, why brag about myself, I’m just an average baker. I’m no Gordon Ramsay”
“I don’t see Gordon Ramsay making apple danishes and apple bread. I bet you could kick his ass” Stacey adds as you all begin to laugh.
Bobby relishes bring included in this moment of banter. Seeing how light and free you are when your wall is completely down and there’s no anxiety in sight.
“I’d love to try them, can I?” Bobby cuts in.
He doesn’t miss the way your face lights up at his comment.
“Sure, I think there’s still some left from my test batch this morning let me go check”
You say before going out back to check.
“Can I ask you something about her?” Bobby asks, his voice soft with a hint of hesitation.
“Of corse you can, though I might not give you a answer”
Bobby can’t help but smile at Stacey’s direct protectiveness of you. He’s happy you have a friend like her.
“Does she have a boyfriend?”
“No she doesn’t” Stacey says arching your eyebrow in curiosity.
“Do you think she’d want to go to dinner with me?”
Stacey looks over her shoulder to see if you were coming before answering.
“I’m going to be real honest for a second. Yes, honestly I think she would love to go to dinner with you. She really enjoys when you come in and truly was worried something had happened to you when you didn’t for a while. But with that being said don’t ask her if you’re not serious about going actually. Don’t ask her just to blow her off or to only get what you want when it’s convenient for you.”
“I get where your coming from”
“I’m not trying to say you’re the type to do that. She just-she has a big heart and people love to take advantage of that. She doesn’t trust or open up easy. At times she has crippling anxiety. So just be patient with her. Your smart and perspective, I’m sure you’ve noticed that her anxiety eases when she sees that you’re here”
Bobby knows exactly what Stacey’s talking about. He picked up on your anxiety immediately, notcing that over time when he’d come in at peak times you’d sometimes be drowning in your anxiety. But he swore you’d look up and connect eyes with you and he’d see your expression soften, your body become less tense. He always thought it was his eyes playing tricks on him, letting himself see what he wanted to see. But Stacey confirming it was real made the fire in his chest burn hotter.
As they can hear you coming back Stacey leans in quickly to Bobby so you don’t hear.
“She finds comfort in you, please don’t take that for granted”
Bobby nods, you’re too close now to respond. He appreciates the serious heart to heart with Stacey.
“Hey sorry it took so long, I think they taste better heated up so I was waiting for the little oven to heat up so I could warm them up for you”
“Well I’ll leave you guys to it, I’ll be in the office for a bit doing payroll. Welcome back Bobby, it was nice to see you” Stacey offers before leaving the two of you alone.
“Thank you, you didn’t have to go through all that trouble for me”
“Oh no it’s no worries, really. Oh I ah should have asked do you need it packed up? You probably need to get back to work.”
“Im actually all done for the day. But I can go, I’m sure you want to go home.” Bobby says as he starts to stand, worried he’s over stayed his welcome.
“Oh ok, here let me pack these up for you”
You’re disappointed, Bobby can tell by your tone. He feels clueless navigating stuff like this sometimes. He never wants to come off as over baring or clingy, he’s been sold so many times that needy guys aren’t attractive.
“It was nice to see you today, hope you like the pastries” you offer unable to tamp down your smile. There was just something about Bobby that drew you too him, that made you feel like there’s this electricity between the two of you.
Bobby’s half way through the doorway when he doubles back. His hearts pounding but he just has to do it.
“Sorry, one more thing. Would you like to go to dinner with me sometime?”
“Like…on a date?” You ask shifting on your feet nervously. It couldn’t be could it?
“Yes, If you’d want that. If not id still like to go as friends.” Bobby wonders if you can see if his heart pounding in is chest because, fuck- he was nervous.
“I’d really like that…to go on a date with you”
A genuine smile rolls so quickly over both of your faces as both of you look at each other in awe.
You go around the counter to get a piece of paper and a pen.
“Here, this is my number just let me know when it works with your schedule and I can make it work with mine”
“Heres mine as well”
The way your fingers graze his when you take his card send electricity shooting through his whole body.
“I’m off the whole week because of all the over time I’ve worked, are you free tomorrow or is that to short notice?”
“No, that works for me I can do that”
Your smile makes Goren feel like he’s the only person in the world.
“Does 5 o’clock work?”
“Works for me”
“Where can I pick you up?”
“You can pick me up here”
“Oh ah I don’t want to rush you, making you get ready here”
“Oh” you let out a little laugh. “I just live upstairs. Stacey and I both do”
“Just ring the buzzer for Apartment 1 next to the graffiti covered door and I’ll come right down”
——————————————————————
The buzzer sounds as you quickly pad across your apartment to the call box.
“Hello”
“Hey it’s Bobby, sorry I’m a little early”
“It’s ok, let me grab my shoes and I’ll be right down”
Bobby fidgets with his hands, rubbing his thumb into the palm of the opposite hand while he waits.
He can’t help the smile that comes at just hearing the door click open and it only grows as you open the door and step out on to the sidewalk. The way the early evening sun hits you makes you look ethereal.
“You look beautiful, I like your dress” Bobby beams.
“Thank you so much, I had to get it when I saw it, but never had a reason to wear it” you smile.
“You look very handsome” you try to turn away but he catches a glimpse of you blushing. Bobby thinks it’s so cute when to get shy like this.
“I really like your suite, it’s a nice color on you” you say reaching over and rubbing the fabric between your index finger and thumb. “It’s soft too” you say with a smile.
Bobby lets out a content hum, the sound makes you painfully aware that you actually did in-fact feel the fabric of his suite coat.
“Oh god I’m sorry” you say pulling your focus to the ground. “I have this bad habit of feeling the texture of things”
“It’s ok, I get it. You’re a tactile person. Please don’t feel bad. I also have a bad habit of touching things. Picking things up and checking them out or playing with them. And most people really don’t like it when you touch their stuff. I try not to but I just can’t help myself.”
“You can feel my dress if you want”
Bobby can’t help but smile at the gesture and the meaning behind it.
His finger tips lightly graze the bare skin of your arm as he takes the fabric of your sleeve between his fingers.
The little giggle that bubbles out of you when the sensation of his touch tickles you leaves him breathless.
To any just passerby this scene unfolding must look awkward. And it is, but it is the must beautiful kind of awkward. The both of you showing vulnerable glimpses of yourselves to one another and being met with nothing but acceptance.
“Do you like Italian food? There’s a great place near here I thought I could take you too, if you’d like”
“I love Italian, that sounds great”
The two of you fall into comfortable small talk as you walk to the restaurant.
The two of you are met with a warm happy welcome when you walk into a quaint restaurant.
“Welcome back, Bobby! Your usual table and meal tonight?” The hostess says with a smile.
He comes here often
“I…ah actually would like table for two tonight” Bobby responds as he turns to smile at you.
“Wonderful, right this way” the waitress beams
“Their food is very good here. The veal parmesan is my favorite but you really can’t go wrong with anything here”
“Can I get anything else to drink besides water for the two of you?”
“I’ll have a glass of red wine please”
“And for you miss?”
“Oh, just water is ok for me”
“I’ll ah I’ll just stick with water too”
“No, no it’s ok, please have the wine”
“Sorry I should have asked if you were ok with alcohol.”
“Really it’s ok. It’s not like that. I just… I’m admittedly very nervous about tonight so if I mix that with alcohol, I’ll just talk your ear off” you laugh.
“I think I’d like that” he smiles. He could listen to you talk all night long.
It’s at this point you’re painfully aware that the restaurant is getting very busy. A huge party arrived taking over one whole side of the tiny space. You’re trying to ignore it, to just focus on the sound of Bobby’s soothing voice. You so badly want tonight to go well, and certainly having a panic attack within the middle of the restaurant would not help in that.
The two of you order dinner, as the loud drone of conversations are crashing together. Your heart starts pounding as all the chatter becomes impossible to sort through. You squirming around in your seat as you try to sooth yourself doesn’t go unnoticed by Bobby. He sees your pulse quickening in the glow of the restaurant, as your eyes squeeze shut. He knows right away you’re having a panic attack without you having to say anything as he springs into action.
Quietly he goes up to the hostess, explaining that you’re not feeling well and asks to pay for dinner and for it to-go.
When he turns back you’re gripping the table so tightly your knuckles are white.
Bobby kneels down next to you,smoothing his hand up and down your back. The way you relax into his touch fills his chest with that familiar warm sensation.
“Why don’t we go” he softly says into your ear.
I really fucking did it now
Letting out a pained sigh you slowly stand. You can’t even bring yourself to look at him as he guides the two of you out of the restaurant, his hand never leaving your lower back.
“Are you ok?” He tilts his head trying to look at your face.
You can feel yourself retreated further and further inward, embarrassed and upset with yourself.
“I should go, I’m sorry I ruined your night. Thank you for taking me out, or atleast trying too”
You turn to walk away but Bobby reaches out for your arm, stopping you in your tracks.
“Please wait. I’ll take you home if you’d like. But you need to know you’d your not ruining my night.”
“That’s very nice of you but…” you start but Bobby cuts you off when he sees tears in your eyes.
“Hey, do you like ice cream? What if we got ice cream and walked around the park?
“Wait you want to continue our date by getting ice cream when we couldn’t even get though dinner”
“I won’t tell if you won’t” Bobby smirks
“Ok” you smile
“Maybe there will be a lot of ducks at the pound” you say smiling up at him as the two of you exit the ice cream parlor.
“You like animals” it’s less of a question and more of making a mental note out loud.
“I do. I love animals. I like them more than most people because all they want is to give and receive unconditional love. They don’t judge you. They’re just there for you.”
“I never thought about it that way, but you’re right. It really is unfair that some of us have to feel that way.”
“It is because I don’t think you ever fully get used to being an acquired for most people. I just wish It hadn’t taken me so long to realize most people were just using me.”
Bobby’s both saddened and surprised by your comment. On one hand it hurts him that you’ve ever had to feel this way, that you’ve had to experience that same kind of loneliness. And on the other hand he’s never had someone pull the thoughts right out of his own head, to be able put to words to what that exact feeling is like.
A thought occurred to Bobby- Would she let me hold her hand. Before he can stop himself hes sliding his hand softly down your fore arm to lace his fingers with yours.
“Is this ok?” Bobby asks bashfully asks as the two of you enter the park.
The way you lock eyes with him when you answer, the way you’re filled with pure happiness radiating off of you makes the breath catch in his throat. He’s never felt this free before with anyone and he’s prepared to make sure you feel that you’ll always feel that way too.
—————————————————————-
That one date turned into the two of you seeing eachother every day that week that Bobby was off.
That week turned into months, 4 months to be exact and as you burst onto the street below, your arms full of bags Bobby cant remember a time he was happier.
“What’s all this?” He laughs as he takes the bags as you two wait for a cab to his place.
“We havnt gotten to see each other in a couple weeks, I though I could cook dinner for us and we could just relax, watch some movies or read.”
“You don’t have to go through all that trouble”
“Well I want too, besides I got a new cookbook with some of the gift cards you gave me for the bookstore. So there’s some stuff I’ve been dying to make.
“ you know.. you didn’t have to do that you know. You didn’t have to send that gift card over”
“I know. But I was upset I couldn’t take you to the book store to get that new book you’ve been excited about. Were you able to get it?”
“Yes! I was able to get the last signed edition they had” you beam up at him, unable to contain your excitement.
“I havnt finished it yet, but it’s so good Bobby! I brought it so you could see it, can I show you?”
“Of course” he smiles as he leans against you, looking on as you show him the book.
“Do you mind if shower quickly?”
“Of course, no rush. I’ll get started on dinner. Take your time, don’t worry about me” you coo, wrapping your arms around his neck as you push yourself up on your tippy toes to kiss him.
As Bobby wipes the steam covered mirror with his towel he can’t help but stare at his own reflection, desperate to see himself the way you see him. Everything about being around you feels like a dream, still In disbelief that a girl like you would choose to spend time with him. That a girl like you who’s so kind, patient and loving wants him in her world.
Bobby knew he wasn’t for everyone, that most people thought he was to weird, obsessive and by the book. He had a short fuse when it came to other peoples bullshit and could be somewhat of a loose cannon but the moment someone made comments about him he would shrink back into himself because deep down he always believed their hateful words.
But when you look at him, your eyes are always filled with a level of love and empathy that he’s never received from anyone before. Bobby knows he’s weird, that there’s a lot about himself and his personality that he can’t help. When it comes to you though he feels free, he never feels out of place or like he doesn’t fit into society when he’s with you.
The sight of you swaying to the music you have on as you cook makes his heart thunder in his chest.
I love this women
“Dance with me for a moment while dinner cooks” Bobby whispers, his breath fanning your neck as he wraps his arms around you nuzzling into you.
“I don’t know how too” you giggle, never getting enough when he’s like this- clingy and playfully romantic.
“It’s ok, follow my lead. I’ll teach you.” Bobby relishes moments like this. He loved teaching you things.
“There, that’s it, just like that” he coos as the two of you glide around the kitchen.
You let out the cutest content hum as you buried your face in his chest. He gradually slows the two of you to a stop as he holds you In the middle of the kitchen.
“What are you thinking about?” He asks kissing the crown of your head.
You tilt your head up to find his deep brown eyes watching you intently.
“I’m thinking about how happy you make me”
Just as he’s about to reply Bobby’s work phone starts ringing. He lets out a gravely growl.
“I’m sorry, that’s work I have to get it”
“It’s ok” you whisper stepping back to busy yourself taking dinner out of the oven. You try to hide the fact that you’re sad, but it’s useless, Bobby knows he can feel it, he knows your micro-expressions like the back of his hand.
“This is Goren” he answers the phone as he steps into the living room.
The rest of the phone call is in a quick hushed tone. You can tell Bobby’s frustrated by the call.
“I-I have to go. I’m really sorry. There’s a huge development in our case and they need me”
“It’s ok. I’ll just put this in the fridge and go too”
“No no. It’s ok please stay. Make yourself at home. I will be back I just don’t know when.”
“O-okay”
This couldn’t have come at a worse time is all Bobby can think as he makes his way to the station. You’re always so good about his schedule but this is the first time he’s had to leave abruptly like that for work and while you were at his place no less. A place you havnt been many times and he knows your probably anxious right now about being there alone.
“What’s the update?”
“The manager of a motel in the Catskills called the tip line saying a father and two children matching Nathan and his kids checked into his motel a couple of hours ago. Chef wants us to go out there and stake it out.”
“Alright let’s head out then”
——————————————————————
“Sorry to have to call you in Bobby” Eames says finally breaking the silence in the back of the stake out van.
“It’s fine, wasn’t trying to be short on the phone” Bobby waves his hand as he’s looking out the window.
“Eames I think I got something” he says handing her the binoculars.
“Over there at the vending machine, I think that’s Lilly, Nathan’s daughter”
“She was pretty glued to you when we were there for questioning drew you that picture, maybe she remembers you. If she does she could get us access to Nathan.”
Eames and Bobby cautiously approach the little girl at the vending machine.
“Hi Lily, do you remember me and my partner Alex? We came to your house a few times.”
“Yes, policeman Bobby. Did you hang my picture up?”
“Of course I did, right next to my desk just like I said.” Bobby says kneeling next to Lily.
“You did! I hope everyone likes it!” Lily’s eyes light up as she scoots closer to Bobby.
“Can you tell us where you dad and brother are?” Eames asks
“They are in the room. Dad and bothers hair is turning blonde but the room is really stinky so I came out here. Dad said mine would change too.”
“He’s bleaching their hair” Bobby says locking eyes with Eames.
“Sweetheart, do you think you could take us to the room, we’d like our hair blonde too.”
“Ok, but could I have some more chips? I’m hungry”
“Yes, let’s get you some more chips” Bobby says pulling a dollar from his pocket and slipping it into the machine and handing the chips to the girl.
“Can you show us the way? we don’t know where to go?”
“Mmhmm” Lily hums happily as her little hand grabs Bobby’s.
Bobby and Eames hang back a moment as Lily enters the room.
“Daddy! My friend are here and they got me some chips!”
Nathan looks up to unexpectedly to find the pair starring back at him, scrambling he draws his gun.
“Hey..hey point your gun at me not my partner.” Bobby’s voice booms
“We’re just here to talk Nathan, we walk to help you.”
“Bull shit you don’t want to help me. You don’t give a shit about me. You just want to take my family away.” Nathan gestures angrily, turning his attention back towards Eames.
“Hey what did I tell you focus on me, not my partner.”
“We do want to help you, and we will. We will make sure that you have access to therapy and meds on the inside.”
“Fuck you man I’m not going away, you’re not putting my kids with strangers” Nathan reaches for Lilly while waving his gun at Bobby.
“Daddy please stop shouting at my friends”
“Shut up, they’re not your friends, they want to take you away from me just like they did with mommy”
“Why don’t you let my partner take the kids to the diner to get some food and you and I will have a talk.”
“Give her your gun and phone, put them on the floor and slid them over to her, no funny business” Nathan motions his gun towards Eames.
Bobby does what he’s told. He knows it’s risky but he needs to get Eames and the kids out of here.
“Lily can you draw me some new pictures to hang up at work?”
“Ok I can do that” she says as she takes Eames and her brother’s hand and they all leave.
“You know she looks up to you, ever since the two of you came poking around the house asking question she’s talked about you guys nonstop. It’s pretty cruel to tell a child you care just to get what you want.”
“I’m not lying. I hung the picture up next to my desk.”
“You’re the one lying to her about us taking her mother away.”
“If you hadn’t of been hanging around asking questions….” Bobby cuts Nathan off mid sentence.
“Nathan. Your embezzling money, stealing from your clients. We’re doing our jobs asking questions.”
“If you didn’t come around asking questions that made my wife suspicious she’d still be alive.”
“Don’t put that on me. You killed your wife not me.” Bobby shouts unable to keep his cool any longer.
“You don’t get it do you? This is a eye for a eye situation”
“So what, you want to hurt me? You want hit me? Go ahead, give me the best you’ve got.” Goren snarls.
Nathan laughs
“Only one of us is leaving this room and it’s not going to be you Bobby”
“You’re really stooping to a new low threatening a detective.”
“It’s not a threat. Your not leaving this room alive”
Bobby’s starting to panic, his heart pounding against his chest as he try’s to figure a way out.
“If you kill me youll never see your kids again, you’ll loose everything.”
“I already lost everything when you forced me to kill my wife. My only choice is to take you out.” Nathan says as he takes a step closer
“And what are you going do when your daughter comes in here and sees you’ve killed her friend.”
“Do not talk about my daughter. She needs to learn that the world is cruel and that not everyone is what they seem” Nathan spits as he digs the gun into Bobby’s chest.
Bobby’s mind races as he try’s to slow his breathing. He knows Nathan wants to see him panicking, he’s desperately trying to ease his mind. In all of his career he’s never felt this close to death, he can’t do that to Eames or to you.
“Hope you told the person you have at home that you love them because you’ll never see them again”
In an instant all Bobby sees is your face, the way you looked into his eyes as he lead you around his kitchen in a dance. Everything about it was so simple and romantic and then you told him how happy he makes you. And then he never got to tell you how happy you make him, how he’s never loved anyone the way he loves you. The idea of never getting to see what life would be like with you makes him see red and he snaps.
“Well come on, do it if you’re going to do it” Bobby Growls. The pain of his thoughts being flooded with moments that would never be with you, hurts worse than death it’s self he’s sure of it.
A rapid secession of bangs rings out from the other side of the door rendering Nathan distracted for a slipt second. Bobby lunges forward grabbing ahold of the gun and kicking his knee trying to knock him down.
He pushes against Bobby causing him to stumble back, he attempts to take a shot at Bobby but when does he pushes hard back into him. The bullet lodges into the wall as Nathan regains his footing holding the gun on Bobby.
Eames bursts through the door in this moment.
“Nathan drop your weapon” she shouts holding her gun on him.
“Your going to have to shoot me or I’m going to shoot your partner”
Nathan lunges torwards Bobby and with out hesitation Eames shoots him in the b chest in self defense.
Bobby sits there in the back of the van, his head in his hands as they make the couple hour drive back to the city.
“Are you alright, Bobby?” Eames asks needing to check on her partner.
“Am I am ok? No I’m not ok. I almost died. Almost never saw her again.” He grits out, frazzled and shaken by the whole ordeal.
“Ugh sorry. I didn’t mean to yell, I’m just shaken up”
“I heard what he said to you. You love her don’t you?”
Bobby nods in response, afraid to say it out loud.
“Does she know?”
“No” Bobby shakes his head with a low voice. He lets out a long breathy sigh as he leans his head back against the wall of the van before closing his eyes.
“I feel loved too” Bobby breaths out into the dark quietness of the van as they pull back into the station garage.
Bobby never talks like this, so Eames knows he’s being genuine and vulnerable with her.
“You go, I’ll go up and do our paperwork before I go home.”
“No it’s ok”
“You’ve had a long night, you deserve some rest. Take a few paid days off. If the captain has an issue with it he can take it up with me”
“Thank you, Eames” Bobby gives her a tight lipped smile before heading to his car.
You’re all he can think about on you his drive home. He’s so distraught and disheveled over tonight’s events. All he wants right now is for you to crowd his senses, to be in your arms with your hands messaging through his hair as you tell him everything going to be alright.
As Bobby pulls up to his places he hope that some luck is on his side, that you’ll still be there but he fears it’s unlikely. After a few minutes he drags himself inside. You left the light on above the sink for him, there’s a note telling him that dinner is in the fridge for him. He takes this as a sign that you’ve left and his shoulders sag a little.
He just stairs at the small plate of food on the counter. His nerves are still through the roof from work but he knows he needs to eat, not really remembering the last time he did. He’s aimlessly pacing around the kitchen picking at the plate of food when he notices warm dim light coming from his bedroom.
Maybe she did stay.
Bobby stops in his tracks at the sight of you sound asleep in his bed with a your book laid across your chest. He can’t help but tear up as he sinks down on the bed next to you, leaning over you to grab your bookmark off the bedside table. As he gently takes the book off your chest and places the bookmark inside he notices your wearing one of his undershirts as a bed shirt.
Softly he lets his body fall onto yours, his head nuzzling into the crook of your neck.
“Mmhmm Bobby” you hum sleepily as you wrap your arms around him tightly, one hand instinctually messaging through his short greying curls.
Bobby lets out a ragged breath as he melts further into you.
“What time is it? I should go and let you get some rest.”
“Please…don’t go. Don’t leave me alone” Bobby chokes out.
“I-I I’m not going anywhere Bobby”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not tonight, not right now. I’m just to-I was just to scared I’d never see you again. I just want to be near you”
“Why don’t we take a shower, that will help sooth you.
Bobby watches you in complete awe of the way you move around the bathroom getting the shower ready, at how caring and loving you are with him. It’s hard for him to believe that all of this is real. That someone like you would truthfully care for him, would want to spend time with him. It’s hard for him to trust people because of his line of work and the life hes had, but opening up to and trusting you was the best decision he ever made.
Taglist: @malindacath @aselys @jupiteress @yesalwayswelles @samfromstardewsgf23 @pixiehex1985 @celticwitchofsorrow @capondi @thatsjustdandy @storywriter12 @namesirrelevant @lzrdonaleash @thegirlthatwillstealurman @modestlyabsurd @cheyanne-chan @darkangelforever333 @gertieisayellowjeep @shuilian @elefrog25-blog @nightsore @dumbasswalkinghere @liviadrusilla44 @musicalwayshelp0193-blog @malevolent-muse @mandy426 @missingfromthephotographs
#neurodivergent#bobby goren#bobby goren x reader#bobby goren x f!reader#robert goren#law and order fanfiction#law and order criminal intent#criminal intent#dick wolf#Law and order#vincent d’onofrio#fanfic
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Reyna, Sova, Fade and Breach getting proposed to.
ℙ𝕣𝕠𝕡𝕠𝕤𝕒𝕝

Words: 951
You had gone to Brimstone with the request of a week off, as you and your partner, Reyna or as you call her by Zyanya, were going back to Mexico. She was ecstatic to return, you were as well but you had another idea in mind. And the locals were more than willing to help.
The first day was spent browsing some jewelry stores before commissioning a place, specifically for a ring. The metal was the best gold they had, with shining magenta stones placed in it.
For the next few days while the ring was being completed you let her show you around, not surprisingly all the locals loved you. At some point they started guiding you both towards the area’s centre, with everyone surrounding it. So she got rightfully suspicious.
“What have you done?”
“Zyanya, I think everyone can agree with me here,” Taking a deep breath before you continued, grabbing the ring to show her. “You’ve changed my life, and everyone’s for the better, and I’m hoping you’re willing to do it for the rest of my life?”
It was almost laughable at how you looked right now, but not maliciously.
“Of course, Estimado.”
Letting you place the ring on her finger before pulling you close for a kiss. Hearing everyone cheer for the two of you.
***
Estimado - dear
The room was filled with conversation and the crackling of the fire. Sasha sat next to his Babuska while you were on her other side, this was a night she would love to have again. Soon enough he noticed how fidgety you were slowly becoming.
“Голубь, are you alright?”
Taking a deep breath as you stood up, reaching into your pocket to pull out the box.
“Sasha, ты выйдешь за меня?”
The other two paused, his Babuska wasn’t surprised, she was waiting for his response. Relaxing as he started laughing, reaching around into his back pocket. Only to pull out… another box.
“Y/N, it seems you’ve gotten quicker.” Covering the space inbetween you two in a few steps, “But yes, I’ll spend the rest of my life with you.”
***
Голубь - Dove
ты выйдешь за меня? - will you marry me?
She never thought about marriage.
It was generally hard to think about it when almost every thought was a nightmare, but that's all you were thinking about. Hazal was the only girl you want to spend the rest of your life with, unable to imagine yourself with anyone else.
With hope in your mind you brought the rings, one with a light blue gem, representing her right eye colour. You could, and have spent hours staring into her own eyes, and you’d never get tired of it. The other one held a [colour] gem, matching your own. Keeping them safe in your pocket until the right time, which came soon enough.
You were still awake until the late of night, unable to sleep knowing what you were planning. Hazal on the other hand fell asleep easily enough, staying asleep was the difficult part. At one point she gave up opting to lay on your stomach while on her phone, talking about anything that came to mind.
Reaching over to the bedside table, grabbing the two rings.
“What happened this time?”
She sighed before responding.
“They went after you, I don’t know what they did but…” Hearing her voice crack broke your heart, pulling her closer. “You didn’t return.”
“Well, you don’t have to worry about that anymore,” Curious, she looked up, eyes meeting yours before moving to the rings. “Please Hazal, let me into your mind and do whatever I can to help.”
Her eyes teared up slightly before she blinked, moving up to pull you into a harsh kiss. Showing you how she felt at that moment, mumbling something before going in for another kiss.
“I won’t let them touch you, benim rüyam.”
***
benim rüyam - my dream
Marriage wasn’t something Erik thought about often, maybe once or twice in his younger years. Ever since he started dating you though, those thoughts have skyrocketed. It wouldn’t be your normal wedding due to… ya know, everything really.
Luckily enough for him you have also been thinking about marriage. For anyone else you would’ve spent a good chunk of your paycheck on a ring, but this is Erik you’re talking about. He doesn’t care for expensive rings, so something personal is what you are looking for.
So you went to one of his closest friends about this, Raze. She was ecstatic to take part in this, starting on it instantly. She had finished within the day, pushing aside any other projects to complete this one. Handing them and a necklace over to you she shoved you out of the room, following you all the way to the gym.
Which is where you found him, Skye and deadlock. The latter two were across the room, while Breach had just grabbed his bag to leave. All three of them paused and looked over to the now open door.
“Babe!”
“Erik, I have something to ask you.”
“Did I do something?”
Silently laughing at him before pulling the rings from behind your back. Looking at him as you opened your hand.
“Erik Torsten, will you marry me?”
The room went silent, you held your breath. His eyes went wide while his mouth opened, his arms moved slightly before pausing.
“YES!”
In seconds he had dropped his bag, moved over to you and threw you up into the air before catching you. Holding you close as your arms wrapped around his neck, careful to not drop the rings. Leaning back just enough to clasp the necklace onto him, Erik placing you down soon after.
He took your ring and ever so carefully, placing it on your finger. Beaming when he succeeded.
#valorant x reader#valorant x male reader#valorant reyna#valorant reyna x reader#reyna x reader#valorant sova#valorant sova x reader#sova x reader#valorant fade#valorant fade x reader#fade x reader#valorant breach#valorant breach x reader#breach x reader#wisteria♥
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“Meu Amor”
pairing: inês bettencourt x oc
fluff
prompts:
inês is out playing with the portugal team and you surprise her
“meu amor, i miss you so much” inês said with a slight pout on the face, she was on her fiba europe tournament representing Portugal in Lithuania. she had been extremely excited all summer over that tournament and had been telling you on how she hoped she was picked so she could represent her country. “ i miss you too baby, so much, i wish i could be there with you” i said not lying in a single word, i truly missed my girl and being 30 hrs away from one another with a 7 hour time difference was heavy on both. “ i wish i could hug you and kiss you, i miss those big cheeks “ she said with a sly smile at the last phrase. i laughed the least i could because being sick in the summer sucks and not being to able to be with your girlfriend for something she loves also sucks but laughing and your throat hurting sucked even more.
“i’m finally on my last days of meds, i’m definetly feeling better! how was your game? how did you feel?” i said trying to get some words out of her “ well in all honestly we were pretty tense at first, i guess we were nervous but after a while we got the hang of eachother and did pretty well. i dedicated you a basket”
“oh yeah? which one?” i laughed know she just came up with that, whenever she plays she is always locked in and doesn’t think about anything but the game,but i let her keep talking. “the one where i did a right handed reverse layup” a big smile came out of her proud of her accomplishment on court. “well ok, if you say so” i was getting tired the time delay had me crazy and all i wanted was to be with my girl, she was doing some stuff around her hotel room “hey babe” i said “i’m going to sleep now, it’s late and you know i’ve got to get some rest” “ oh yeah of course, i love you, sleep well and get better please” i smiled hanging up the phone.
to her surprise she didn’t know i was lying, i was sick and did feel bad from time to time but i was on my way out of being sick and on my way to Lithuania. ever since she got the news on her secured placed for the team i knew i had to give her a big surprise, i told her that i wouldn’t be able to go and that i had to stay over summer for work and family, when really i had bought plane tickets and reserved my hotel to watch her in every single game. knowing how much this meant for her i knew she would love this. i was on my way to the airport and finally after a couple of layovers i was exhausted. in the process i had received messages from inês that she wanted to facetime but i had to make up excuses saying i was too tired and felt bad. i actually felt kind of bad for lying to her but i knew it would be so worth it. a whole day without hearing her voice i was exhausted from all the traveling.
as i took a taxi to take me to my hotel i swear i was going to faint, how do people deal with this it’s just too much. arrived at the hotel checked in and had my room ready, i ran like a little kid as fast as i could to my room, key in hand i opened the door and as soon as i was inside i plugged my phone and fell asleep hard.
i woke up to my ringtone and checked the screen, inês was calling “ shit” i said to myself, what would i say to her? she will notice the background being unusual, maybe i will just tell her i am out somewhere, yeah let’s say that. with my hair in a big mess and the darkest eyes bags in the world i ran to the bathroom coating my face with cold water to wake up,knowing she might get upset if i don’t respond since it’s been almost two days of my traveling, then i hear the ringing stop but a bunch of notifications sounds came up. oh was she worried now. “shit, ughhh” this surprise was going heaviness than expected.
i read her messages and they went something alike ‘are you feeling better?, goodnight love you, we won!!, goodmorning to the most beautiful girl!, are you okay baby?, are you okay? in worried you haven’t been answering’ and in all honestly i was so tired i lacked mobile service the whole trip and all of the wifi sucked so i most definitely had not been notified of her messages through the whole trip. i now feeling bad for everything called her. “inês hello baby” i tried to say as cheerful as i could with all the little energies i had, i put on a big smile for my girl. “ meu amor, você me deixou preocupado” she said quickly definitely as she said worried. “ oh no, don’t worry i am ok it’s just been really long couple of days and you know they are heavy” “ oh, i’m glad you are okay, i was so worried, how are you feeling now ? do i finally have a healthy girlfriend to kiss when i get back home?” i laughed out loud “yes i am officially well of health” yeah right ms.big eye bags “i’m so glad” “ i’ve been seeing your games! but how do you feel?you have been doing amazing bringing the team good points and amazing assistance as always”i commented changing the topic so she didn’t notice and would concentrate on something else,”the girls have been good” and she went on ranting about everything going on. god i cant wait to kiss her again she’s so beautiful and i’m only watching on a screen cannot wait to see her in real life.
the morning went on as our talk was cut short because she had a game later in the evening so she had to warmup and all that. i took my opportunity to shower, get ready, did my make up and dressed cute in her UConn jersey. took a taxi to the stadium and i was so nervous to surprise her, thankfully i had reached out to one of her closest friends from the team and was getting updates from everything going on. she and i had been communicating and she was the only one who knew i would be surprising her and helped me get everything set up. heading to the stadium and arriving i made sure to text anya that i was here and also sent a good luck text to inês like always just so she didn’t start suspecting anything. i sat in the public section and hoped she didn’t see me till the end.
as the game went on portugal was a couple points down but they still had 5 minutes in the fourth quarter. inês was in the game, as you cheered from the bleachers still not spotted by your girlfriend, you kept screaming and cheering for the team. they were catching up and were only five points apart and in that moments inês had just banked a three and as loud cheers came from your mouth , celebrating that your girl had been closing the game up. her teammates kept playing a to a near lever of the actual floor and as inês and the team were going into the hall to go to their locker rooms, anya had spotted you and told you exactly at what time the team would go to the bus so that you could come out of it before everyone went in.
you followed her instructions clearly, as you were now on the bus that would take them to the same hotel you were staying in. a few minutes passed and you were talking to the driver about stupid and common things, you received a notification “ babe! we won!!” a text from inês came in, along with a bunch of smiley face emojis. in that exact moment you also received a text from anya saying they were on their way, which made cut the conversation with the driver as she closed the doors so you could surprise your girl.
as you saw them walk out of the building all in their uniforms with their sweats and full of bags you knew this was the time. they kept approaching the bus and as soon as the doors were opening you waited until someone stepped in , anya. as soon as she was in she told you that everyone in the team knew and that it’s for to go out, those words fell out of her mouth which made me run out of the bus. i went down the steps and every turned to look at me while my girlfriend was looking at something in her bag, a teammate poked her arm, then she turned and looked up.
she stayed still, but a big smile started to form on her mouth, she ran as quick as she could dropping everything and went straight to hugging you. the hug was so full and felt so comfortable, finally being back into my girlfriends arms. we separated and her questions came right up “meu amor,what are you doing here omg” she looked at me in shock, inspecting my face to look out for any answer “i though you were in connecticut, i can’t believe you are here”. “surpriseee” i said with a big smile, she hugged me again and gave me a small peck.
while the team was on their way to the hotel on the bus i had to call a taxi once again. as soon as my ride arrived at the hotel, inês was waiting for me at the entrance. “let me hold this bag for you pretty lady” she said in an exaggerated deep voice, i only laughed as we started talking. arriving in my room now ours, i went ahead and explained her my whole plan” i know how important this is for you and i wnat to make it known that i’m willing to be there for you always” i told her, my words full of sincerity “meu amor, i love you, thank you for this”
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Can we have some TFOne Starscream x Elita headcanons?
I was gonna say no but this is such a comfort ship, because its so good i decided to do a fanfic instead. This is very short because I’m tired
DISCLAIMER: if you don’t like Starscream x Elita, pls scroll ^^
[ STARSCREAM ] x [ ELITA-ONE ]
[ starscream x elita-one ]
Part 2
FANFIC
Let's say that Optimus Prime and Megatron had an agreement and were able to make-up. Instead of the war, it was the rebuilding of Iacon City. Optimus and Megatron ruled the city together and were heavily known for being truthful and real.
Starscream was the second-in-command for Megatron and Elita was the second-in-command for Optimus. Because of this, they had quite a lot of alone-time.
The alone-time they had consisted of awkward silence, tension and disagreements. They never really got along because of their opposing personalities. Starscream was cowardly, betraying and he thinks he’s the best while Elita was demanding, on task and fearless. Starscream thought she was too uptight and willing, sometimes even oblivious to Optimus Prime’s commands. Elita thought he was not deserving of his place as the second-in-command because of his every aspect.
Elita and Bumblebee were just having a small break together, sipping energon in a cozy room seemingly representing a living room. Her and him were just sitting around, each on a seperate couch.
“Why don’t you like Starscream? He’s fun to hang out with!”
“He’s incompetent and bratty. No point in trying to fix him. I don’t understand why you actually enjoy his company so much..”
“Heyy! He’s a good man, he told me that he enjoys your company a-“
“Bumblebee, did I hear you correctly?”
“Uh, no you didn’t. I meant that Starscream doesn’t mind hanging out you.”
“Bumblebee, I’m not stupid. Does Starscream really like my company? I don’t understand… All he does is make a fool out of me, even if it doesn’t make sense.”
“Okay, let me explain to you real quick. You know how I am friends with Starscream? He trusts me with most of his secrets because he thinks I’m really nice soo… He has told me many times about how much he wants to see you and how he wants to ki-“
“Stop, you’ve said enough. I’ll figure this out with him personally later.”
“Oh, well come to me when you need my help!”
Elita stood up with a hint of light-blue spreading across her face, swishing her glass and taking a last sip. She immediately made her way over to Starscream’s quarters with no plan, needing immediate answers.
She makes her way through the work-in-progress building, suddenly slamming the side of her fist on Starscream’s door repeatedly. The door slides open with a grumpy Starscream on the other side. Seemingly his grumpiness changed pretty quickly as he then smirked and crossed his arms.
“Why so sudden?”
“Starscream, I know about your feelings about me.”
“… Well duh, I hate you. What more is there to say?”
“…”
“… Bumblebee told you, didn't he?”
“Yeah, but I’m not complaining.”
THE END
This was more of a funny fanfic than anything else :)
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Okay. I am annoyed by the everything so I’m gonna go ahead and debunk all the arguments against the Francesca X Michaela storyline.
In case you weren’t aware of all the complaints going around, here they are:
they’ve completely changed the storyline from the books! francesca’s infertility storyline was sooo important and now it won’t happen!
eloise would’ve made more sense as the queer bridgerton, her and cressida or some other female character would’ve been great over francesca.
by immediately making francesca attracted to michaela they downplayed john and her’s relationship that was built up this season, they cheapened the book storyline into a cliche love triangle!
michael was the best book hero ever! I can’t believe they’ve changed him to michaela.
I am taking all these criticisms/complaints at face value and ignoring any lesbophobia undertones (for now) just to prove how flawed they still are on their own.
Firstly, saying that Francesca’s infertility storyline has been ruined is far from the truth. Instead it can be done in a different way. Think about Francesca in a queer relationship and wanting kids in the kind of society she lives in. It basically mirrors the infertility storyline from the books except her struggles would become representative of the struggles that queer people who want kids face. If they went for this storyline in her season, I think it would be really really nice, we’ve seen a straight infertility storyline play out so many times, this would be great.
Secondly, I am so tired of hearing that it should’ve been Eloise over Francesca. I don’t think Eloise would’ve made more or less sense as a queer women. I think any and every character has the potential to be written as queer or straight. Being an outspoken women with little interest on marriage shouldn’t make Eloise more queer. I also really liked the idea of a potential Eloise X Cressida romance but that does not mean Francesca cannot be queer. In fact, I’m excited to see this introverted autistic queer girl rep! Francesca, go prove we exist.
Thirdly, Francesca’s season hasn’t even happened yet! Getting mad over one scene of Michaela, saying that John and Francesca’s relationship has been downplayed and that we’re in for a cheapened love triangle story is so unreasonable. It was a single scene and people are choosing to get mad over something that hasn’t even happened yet? Besides, if this storyline plays out, it wouldn’t mean that Francesca shouldn’t have been made queer but simply that the writers didn’t write the storyline to your liking. The fact that there’s this much outrage over this is so ridiculous to me. Wait till her season. We have no idea how they’re going to play out the storyline just yet so stop hating already (there may be some lesbophobia implications to this claim which I have spoken about below).
Fourthly, I know it’s not a nice feeling to not get the chance to see a beloved book character onscreen due to this gender swap. It may feel unfair but I mean but…give Michaela a chance? We haven’t seen her personality yet and we don’t know how Masali will bring her character to life. If your qualms are that the love interest is no longer a guy you can fetishise and fawn over, then well…log out of the internet, rant to a friend and stick to the books. Let the sapphics have their wlw romance that we rarely get these days because we keep getting cancelled since streaming services hate gay women. And no that is not an exaggeration but our plain reality. So let us have this.
Finally, to end things off, let us address the lesbophobia aspect to this separately because it is 100% worth mentioning.
The treatment towards queer women onscreen is hardly the same as the hype around queer men.
We can see it in the way streaming services and the internet hype up gay romances whilst sapphic romances are largely ignored and cast to the side (just to make it clear I have nothing against people enjoying mlm romance I enjoy mlm romance all I’m saying that it’s a real shame that wlw romance doesn’t get the same amount of appreciation).
The response to Francesca X Michaela has been largely negative and it’s frustrating. Outside of the cosy gay rabbit hole that tumblr is, there’s just outrage over this storyline/pairing for a number of different reasons that well…all feel ridiculous.
Bridgerton has gone off the books many times yet there’s more outrage than before when it comes to Francesca X Michaela?
Fans are getting a lot more defensive of John and Francesca’s relationship despite knowing he was never going to be endgame all because of Michaela? I’m sorry but I’m sure that if Michaela was Michael and we got the exact same scene with Francesca, do you think there would be as much outrage over John and Francesca’s relationship being downplayed? No. Let’s be honest. People wouldn’t be as mad because there’d be an attractive man involved.
I think the sapphics deserve so much more and better treatment from fellow non-sapphics. Instead of a show of appreciation, we keep getting unreasonable amounts of fire onto this storyline that hasn’t even happened.
What’s worse is that I know that Francesca X Michaela’s romance could follow the story beats of previous seasons that were eaten up by fans and still be bad to people because sapphic romances are just judged more harshly as straight audiences refuse to connect with them. If their romance isn’t phenomenal and just good, then it won’t be enough which is just frustrating.
So yeah, the hate towards Francesca and Michaela is unwarranted and unjust. People need to calm down and realise that their claims are contributing to lesbophobia whether they realise it or not.
#all this hate on pride too smh#bridgerton#bridgerton spoilers#francesca bridgerton#michaela stirling#francesca x michaela#lgbtq#wlw#bridgerton season 3
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𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕡𝕣𝕠𝕗𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕠𝕣 𝕟𝕖𝕩𝕥 𝕕𝕠𝕠𝕣


ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝟙: 𝔽𝕚𝕣𝕤𝕥 𝕥𝕚𝕞𝕖 𝕚𝕟 𝕊𝕙𝕚𝕓𝕦𝕪𝕒
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Author’s note: Just got invited to a debutante party this February since yesterday on Saturday, so pretty busy this days with my mom.
Another note: Got a little inspirational with Coffee and Vanilla and that one manwha: Tears on a withered flower.
This works includes/warning: All images aren’t mine, grammars ahead, vulgar language, smoking, an alternate universe where they live their own lives in the real world and no borderland, two year age gap; Y/N is nineteen and had a little sister in this story.
Summary: Y/n and her sister visited Shibuya one year ago, now they move in to their new share house as well as it’s a big start for them.
—Pink text represents Y/n’s POV
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When I was eighteen, about one year ago. I was looking after my five year old little sister, Kitachi Aine, who’s walking around in the streets. We were from Yokohama. It was the first thing in the morning, going on a trip with her coming here in Shibuya, while hearing my sister giggling around. I was walking slow as I watch her, the only thing I do as a sister was to take care of her as if I were a mother to my own sister.
“Onee-chan!” she yelled with excitement and that big smile on her face. “Look at everyone in here!”
I weakly laughed and smile back at her, “Hmm…” as I nodded as she continuing running away. I slowly frown just by watching her happy as if everyday I had to raise her like she was my daughter, “Onee-chan?”
I saw her looking at me and came towards me, “Yes?” I asked her, while shrugging everything off my shoulder and smile just for her. While I was squatting down to look at her; my sister was unhappy when I always felt sad.
“Did I do something wrong?” the way she says, made her look so mature for her own age to understand. I casually shake my head and tell her, “Nene, I’m just a little tired,” I said, patting her head while she’s indeed unhappy that I always act like it’s not a big deal, “you can continue running around, I promise I have my own eyes on you.”
I boop her nose as Nene crossed her arms and she was grumpy that I blink, “Onee-chan, just be happy!”
I laughed and smile at her, touching her face gently as I was fixing her hair and nodded, “Yes, I am happy.”
“Smile!”
I smile a little.
“Not that! Real smile!”
I tried to smile.
“No! No! No! Big smile!”
My little sister sometimes pinch me so hard, that it hurts as she tried to make me smile. “Just be happy!”
“Nene!” I move her strong hands away from my face, then I force myself to smile at her. “Okay, is this what you wanted?” as I was clenching my teeth while smiling forcibly.
“Better!” she shouted, squeezing my face.
“Nene!” as I removed her hand away from my face again. Then she crossed her arms and turned around as I heard her, “Hmph!” I simply sigh at the sight of her sass.
When we were at the convenient store, she was just looking around when I told her to only pick one and not more than two or three. Yet, I was responsible in looking after her everyday, because it’s just only me and my little sister having this little adventure ahead. Then I watch her pointing at the one on top of the shelf: it was an onigiri. So, I only pick one just in case if she may not be finishing it, I also pick up some drinks that she likes including me.
Y/N payed it as the cashier lady begin to ask her, then they start talking while Aine was holding hands with her. Her hands slipped away when Aine notice a guy with his motorcycle, “Wow,” she mouthed. He watches him remove his helmet, then he came inside of the convenient store as he bow down at the cashier lady, that she smiles and bow back. While Y/N was too distracted on talking to the cashier woman, that her little sister begin to walk away from her as she followed the guy with the eyebrow pierce, as he was likely picking some food.
He was wearing a black mask and that the only appears was his black eyes and that piercing from his eyebrow, Aine looked around in the candy isle as she was looking at him picking up something from there. She was glaring at the bun then to his eyes then to his whole style; the guy notice her as he squat down and that he glances while smiling underneath the mask. “Are you lost?” his voice was muffled from his mask, but she could hear it clearly.
Her big eyes stares onto his dark ones, Aine shake her head as she was a little afraid of him. Then she pointed at Y/N as he move his head and look behind her, “Is that your mom?” he asked.
Aine nodded and lies about it, the guy chuckles and saw her staring at the lollipop then he turned back to her, “Sweetie, you shouldn’t be walking away from your mom,” he told her and pat her head. “Just return to her, she must’ve been thinking you walked away on her.”
She walked back while he stand up and watches her walking back to her mom (her older sister), he was smiling and then he turned back as the guy took out a lollipop. Then he takes out his phone from the pocket of his leather jacket and that his phone rings as he pick it up, “Hello?”
“Oh, hey sir,” as he was nodding at the sound from his calls. “Yes, I’ll be there in three hours, no worries, I’ll be there shortly.”
He hung up the phone, Y/N and Aine were sitting by the table and stool in the convenient store, while the guy take out the lollipop then look over for cigarettes as the guy went to the cashier lady, “Oh hello, young man, it’s been a while.”
The guy laughed and replied, “Hayashi-san, I haven’t seen you in years after I came here all day.”
The cashier lady laughed and smiled, “You’ve grown so much after your sophomore year at sixteen and always want to eat somewhere alone,” she said. “Anyways, did you grow any muscles? You’ve gotten muscular.”
The guy scoffed and nodded, “Yeah… I am, just took exercise with my boss and it was horrific.”
“Hmm…” she said, looking at Y/N and Aine then turn back to him, “…have you seen anyone yet?” while he put down a cigarette and lollipop.
“No, what do you mean by that?”
“Well… since you’re no longer having high school crushes, you would perhaps have someone in your life by now.”
“Hayashi-san,” he looked at her with an empty glare at her, “from your question, I do not need someone in my life plus I’m very busy at the moment, instead of thinking of someone.”
“I understand… but believe me, you’re gonna,” she said, but the guy shakes his head.
“No, I am not.”
“Yes, you do,” she said, already gotten payed and give him the bag to him.
“No, I am not,” as he took the bag away and walked away.
“Okay, see you later!”
“Uh-huh.”
The guy went outside and heavily sigh, rolling his eyes as he went at his motorcycle. He sat down and took out a cigarette and begin lit it up, then check his phone and texted someone.
Me and Nene were sitting down and looking out of the transparent walls, while I was helping her open the onigiri just for the both of us to eat. She was smiling at me while smile back at her, then I feel my phone vibrate as I took out from my bag and it was my boyfriend: Yui Hitsuji. I was surprise and then I tell Nene, “Stay here, okay?”
She nodded as I get off the stool and walked away, picking up the phone and that I was taking a deep breath. “Hey,” he said to me, as I didn’t know how to respond to him and that it’s been years, that I hadn’t return to Shibuya ever since me and my sister moved in. Hitsuji was my first boyfriend or as you know, we knew each other ever since were both neighbours at that time; it’s been so long I hadn’t thought of him when I moved to Yokohama, sometimes we just talk or chat but now it feels different.
It’s only just me and my little sister and that it’s been busy, I take a deep breath, “Hey, Hitsuji,” I replied back to him.
“How are you beautiful?” he asked, that I rolled my eyes and smile.
“I’m fine, just me and my little sister, visiting Shibuya,” I told him, and that the only thing I ever felt happy.
“Well, I can’t wait to see you there.”
I blinked in surprise, “Wait, you’re going to meet me in person?!”
I covered my mouth after being surprise from my own boyfriend, “Hitsuji… I-I hadn’t even fix myself, are you for real that you’re gonna show up?”
“Well who’s gonna say that I have a lucky girlfriend, who’s naturally beautiful without one,” then he laughed, “see you there.”
“Wait! Wait! Hitsu—”
I was hung up, yet, I gotten embarrassed that my boyfriend is going to show up somewhere in the streets in Shibuya. I take a deep breath and when I turned back to my sister, she was gone. I calmly panic and said, “Nene?” then I turned around, “Nene?”
But then I notice her outside.
Aine was outside as the guy quickly notice, then he dropped his cigarette and crumbled it, moving his hands just to blow off the smoke away and put back his mask. So that Aine wouldn’t catch the smell, “Hey mister?”
“Ah, it’s you, kid, aren’t you supposed to be with your mom?” He said before lifting his eyebrow at her.
“Well, I’m curious about you.”
The guy pointed at himself and asked, “Me?” then Aine nodded in response, while her eyes looked at him. The guy heavily sigh and start to squat down just to looked at her, “What do you want to know about me? But how old are you?”
“I’m only,” as she hold five fingers, then he laughed and just smiles at her, “five.”
“Five? You’re too young to go walk on your own, and you shouldn’t be talk to me,” he said, concerned and very aware for her. “I mean your mom is going to think I was going to do something to you, or else she’ll be very upset with me.”
“I know… I just like those piercing you have on, mister, mama thinks I shouldn’t come near to people who had piercing because they’re bad people.”
“Really?” he didn’t expected of her mother, even he didn’t know that the mom was her older sister. “Well, at least she taught you not to talk to strangers, but for me. I was offended that she thinks every people who had piercing are bad people.”
“I don’t think, you’re a bad person, mister.”
“Kid, I appreciate that you think of me that way, but I’m worried about your mother that she might think you’re missing.”
“Who cares.”
“Who learn you to talk like that?”
“Mommy did.”
He nodded and laughed.
“Well tell your mommy that she should be careful to act around, while you’re here with her.”
She nodded and giggled as he slowly smiles at her underneath the mask, “What’s your name?”
“Kitachi Aine.”
He blinks after hearing her last name, Kitachi, then Niragi slowly repeated her full name but then he asked about her first name, “Can you pronounce your first name and spell it?”
“I-ne, A-I-N-E.”
The guy nodded but hadn’t heard that name before, probably a unique name that must’ve been her mom naming her. “But mama call me, Nene,” she said,
“Nene?” he asked, proceed to nod. “Hmm… can I also call you, Neko-chan?”
She giggled and nodded, the guy pat her head and said, “Nice to meet you, sweetie, call me Niragi.”
“Niragi-san?” as she wasn’t so sure to pronounce it right.
“Hmm…” he nodded, that suddenly his mind start snap when he forgot something. “Oh, I forgot to give you something,” as Niragi takes out from his leather jacket, “I know that you love that lollipop, you always keep looking at,” then he laughed.
She takes the lollipop and bow down, “Thank you,” but then he shushes her for a moment. He curled his open fingers as she knows that he wanted to whisper, “Never tell your mother that I give you this, just hide it for now.” Aine giggled and become all cheeky as she zipped her mouth, then they become friends at the moment as well as Niragi notice Y/N. He quickly stand up and moved back, when she already came and shouted, “Nene!”
“Mama!” she hugged her as Y/N was confused when she call her, mama, but at the same time she feels grateful to be called mama.
Y/N carried her gently then she finally met him eye to eye, “What did you do to my daughter?”
She glares at him as Niragi held his hands without anything, but empty while looking at her. “Apologies for the intrusion, ma’am, I didn’t do anything wrong. I was just looking after her while you didn’t look after her.”
Y/N rolled her eyes and sigh then she whispers to her, “Nene, cover your ears,” as Aine covered her ears and then she glares at him.
“Don’t you dare fucking touch my daughter,” while he nodded at her own words, “if you ever come near her again,” then he proceed to nod, “I’ll fucking kill you,” again he nodded, “you asshole,” lastly he nodded. As Y/N walked away while Aine uncover her ears and looked at him, Niragi wink and wave at her, then she wave back and wink at him.
Weird, that asshole tried to lay his hands on my little sister. Ugh! That asshole!
While I carrying her during at Shibuya in the streets, I feel very irresponsible for taking care of her as I put her down gently. Looking at her so seriously, “Nene,” she was looking down and not look at me, “what did I ever tell you?”
She looked at me in upset, “Stay at the table…” as I heavily sigh after hearing her, so I hugged her. Then I told her, “I’m not mad at you, Nene, I’m worried about you.”
Nene nodded at me and slowly smile at me. But suddenly I heard a familiar voice behind me, “Am I interrupting over something?” then I turned to him as I was surprised.
Hitsuji was right in front of me as I begin clinging my hands around his neck, then I kissed him as I stand back a little and smile. “I brought you flowers,” he said, as I look at a bouquet of flowers.
“Hitsu…” in fact, these are my favourite flowers: white and blue roses.
“Of course, I wouldn’t forget my girl’s favourite flowers, and oh…” then he took out something as Hitsuji gave it to my little sister, “…I wouldn’t also forget that Nene’s favourite snack.”
“Thank you, Hitsu-oniichan!” as my boyfriend fist bum with her and that I laughed.
I was surprise that he gave so much effort, just for me and my sister after being far away; Hitsuji smiled at me as of course, he really missed me so much that I keep forgetting about everything.
◤◢◣◥◤◢◣◥◤◢◣◥◤◢◣◥◤◢◣◥◤◢◣◥
For a while now, we were sat somewhere in a random restaurant, my little sister was playing along with the other kids in that playground. While I was sitting there and my boyfriend was making eye contact around me, “What are you looking at?”
“Just looking at how cute you are, babe,” he said, making me blush as I was playing the straw. “Or did you easily forget about me all of a sudden?”
“What, no! I just didn’t think after a whole year I was in Yokohama. I mean… I missed you for all my life, but why am I not acting like I usually do?” my boyfriend gently touched my hand and look at me.
“Well, you’ve been stressed so much after… you know…” He knows what I’m going through, the fact he kept it for so long as he knows about why it’s just me and my little sister. Since I’m the only one, an eighteen year old girl taken the part as a mother to my little sister, who’s only five years old.
I sigh and looked down then nodded. “How long are you gonna stay at Yokohama?” he asked, looking at me as we haven’t been talked about this.
“Hitsu… you know, I’ve been thinking of planning on moving back to Shibuya and find somewhere for university. I’ve been earning a lot of money from my part-time job,” I confessed, then he looked at me in surprise.
“Really?” as I laughed and nodded from looking at his silly surprise look. “Oh my god, babe, that is so good to hear, I mean… when are you going to?”
“Well, next year,” I answered, then he was excited and smile at me.
“I am so thrilled, I better should plan something just for you and your little sister when you guys move in,” as he takes out his phone and begin texting notes, then I laughed.
“Honey, you don’t need to be—”
I was cut off and stop me from interrupting his plan for next year, “No, you ladies need to relax and let the man do the effort for your guy’s welcoming.”
I always laughed as I feel like myself again, when he was around, “Okay, mister, do whatever you want. I’ll always love you, no matter what you put on the effort.”
“And I love you back, babe,” he said and blow me a kiss, then wink at me that I smile.
About one year later, it was barely my birthday today as I was almost nineteen. But I don’t really often celebrate and that I was too busy moving out some of the things, then I met my landlord who’s also living here in a share house. He seems not so much sociable or that close towards me or my sister, and when my sister comes near to him, I panic over it and said, “I’m so sorry!” as I stopped Nene from going any further.
“Oh no, it’s fine,” he said, no reaction but casually frowns as his hands were on the pocket of his pants. “I’ve always wanted to look after a little one.”
I never suspected of him being naturally nice to us as if thinking, he may not been bad after our first interaction since we moved out.
“Oh… umm…” I awkwardly bow and looked at him, “…sorry for not introducing myself, I’m Y/N, Kitachi Y/N,” then I introduce to my sister, “and this is my sister, Aine.”
“Aguni, Aguni Morizono,” he moved his head down and look back at me, then he pass me the note for the rules. “Here, are the rules,” he told me, then he walked away quickly as I tried to catch up with him. Aguni went downstairs while I was holding my little sister’s hand. “Downstairs, is where you should be moving your stuff here,” he told me, showing a very big space in here. “You guys have everything privately and your own room… but the kitchen and the bathroom, that would be upstairs.”
I bow down and thank him as he came back upstairs, then I turn to look at my little sister with a smile. “So, what do you think?”
“Big!” she giggled and happily jump.
“Y/N!” I heard Aguni shouting so loudly upstairs, I stand up as I carried my little sister back upstairs.
“Y-Yes, Aguni-san!” I suddenly freak out from his voice.
“Your lover boy has been waiting for you at the door,” he said, as I gently put down my little sister and ran to the door.
“Oh hi, Hitsu!” I said with a big smile, then I hugged him as I notice that he was holding a big flower of bouquet as I laughed. “Aww, you shouldn’t have.”
Aguni cleared his throat as we look at him, “Yui… I should’ve known that this is your girlfriend.”
“Yes, she’ll be living with you.”
“You should’ve told me, unless I hadn’t slipped that plan from yours,” then I watch him trying to take out something. “Kitachi, this is your clue for tomorrow’s tonight,” as I looked down at the note and take it.
“Well, see you tomorrow,” he said. “Aguni-san, nice seeing you!” then he left as I was left with bouquet of big flowers.
“Don’t worry about the big flowers he gave you, I can bring you a big display for that,” said Aguni, as he tried to be more nice.
“Oh no, no, no, I’m fine. I got my own.”
He nodded and said, “Look, I know this is really a hard to re-adjust things for you two, I just wanna know if you need anything I’ll be there upstairs at the third floor,” as he pointed up there by the circular staircase where his working out room and his own room were.
“Thank you,” she bow down again, then he walked away and went upstairs.
For quite sometime to look everywhere at their new share house: there were too many space and it’s very big. The two of them hugged each other and smile, then Y/N carried her and twirl around as she stopped and laughed. “This is going to be a fun day, Nene!”
“Yeah!” she giggled.
#alice in borderland#alice in boderland x reader#x reader#character x reader#imawa no kuni no arisu#niragi suguru#suguru niragi x reader#fanfic#niragi alice in borderland#alternate universe#alice in borderland characters#oc#oc x character#fem y/n
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Just wanted to pop on here and say I’ve been reading all your wenclair works ever since sweet and sour and not a bit nice which was the first wenclair fic I had ever read and I still struggle to find wenclair ficts that reach that level of love that I have for it! Don’t even get me started on jealousy, jealousy I am yours-I know you often get a lot of love for it-and I hope you don’t ever get annoyed with people telling you that-but that fic is a comfort fic to me personally. Anyway, I look forward to all your ficts and even the small updates you do about Enid’s brothers ages 🤣 thank your sticking with wenclair for so long! Now that I got my fangirling over with, what did you think of the teaser? Any predictions? Netflix finally showed Enid! And her look is adorbs!
It’s time for a re-read of hold my hand it’s sunny outside for me! Hope this makes you smile even a tiny bit. ❤️
Hi! Thank you so much! I could literally never get tired of people telling me they love my works. That goes for any of them. It gives me so much motivation to hear. Even if it’s for finished works like “jealousy, jealousy” and ahhh !!! That’s so awesome that “sweet and sour” was one of your first! Thinking back on that one and how it was the 90th fic posted on ao3 for wenclair Will always blow my mind. It makes me happy to hear, and that even my small updates about Enids brothers you look forward to. I always wonder if people care about stuff like that so it makes me really happy to hear! And I’m not just saying that, it genuinely does make me happy.
I’ve actually been trying to work on “hold my hand, it’s sunny outside” recently. I’ve written a little bit for it and probably one of the funniest sequences is about to occur in it. At least, it is currently one of my favorites because of how ridiculously high school and teen drama it is.
That being said, here is a little sneak peak with absolutely zero context. I wrote it like the day before yesterday or something. But hopefully I can get a chapter out soon :)

Okay, now THE TEASER!!! Oh my godddd! I was absolutely estatic! Waiting for it to come out and knowing when I’d wake up it would be there had me going through the roof. I’ve stalked the Wednesday IMDB page so many times I knew there would be a TSA security check and that scene did not disappoint! And ENID IS SO CUTE. I am still sad they didn’t keep her scar because I personally really wanted face scar Enid but I do understand how much of an effort the makeup department would have had. We had like one picture of enid and that tiktok so it was awesome to get the “howdy roomie” again.
The doll! Okay, I have thoughts. Most of them is me trying to pull anything out of thin air. I am absolutely dreadful at theories. The only theory I ever got correct was Wednesday meeting Enid at the boat which took me by surprise. It was literally the stupidest prediction that became correct.
My first thought regarding the dolls was that each doll signifies a person. I don’t want to say voodoo dolls. I was honestly thinking about that one really horrific episode of criminal minds. And that each doll is supposed to represent someone Wednesday either cares about or someone around Wednesday.
Secondly, I think the kidnapped photo of her tied to the chair could be a vision. Maybe that’s insane of me to say, especially since we know she gets the doll. But it’s just one thought out of many. A lot of people have been talking about the blood so it made me wonder if we would see the blood both in the vision or out of the vision.
If it’s *not* a vision then I would say she 100 percent has one in that chair. It’s the first episode (at least it should be a lot of people are saying it is especially since the doll) but also like ??? I’m kind of like how do we know she even GOT the doll from that creepy place. Sure, I’m sure she does. Whatever. But also what if she didn’t? I feel like an idiot looking at one photo from every angle and pulling all its strings. That doll is definitely fucking cursed though.
We could totally start the season with her being kidnapped with her stalker and that immediately being gotten out of the way. That doesn’t have to be the main plot of season two. We know there’s a slasher themed ep that I’m really excited for. I do think the masked villain is either morning song, or apart of that slasher episode. But a killer doll AND a masked killer would go kind of insane. Im really interested in hearing more about morning song though. We did get one shot of Bianca and I know there’s theories about her becoming Tyler’s master but I just don’t like that one. It could be true, maybe, but either way I don’t think I care. I also don’t know what she would use Tyler for besides killing morning song and her mom, maybe. I don’t know if even Bianca has the balls to kill her mom though. Her step dad who is running the cult tho??? She would DEFINITELY kill him for sure. Wouldn’t it be insane if the new headmaster is the cult leader of morning song. I can’t remember if it was a guy or girl (the new headmaster not morning song cult leader) but I’m pretty sure it was a guy.
At this point I am fully rambling. Let me think—
Okay I watched the teaser again. Every family has dark secrets could just be about what we’ve already seen. Like Morticia warning Wednesday away from keeping secrets. On the other hand the Addams are the Addams so it could literally be ANYTHING I would say though if it’s Morticia and Gomez hiding something *again* it would be a little eh. The whole family being in on something would be interesting. I can think of like sacrifice’s from old ancestors that gave them power or something but then I feel like that might throw off the outcast lore they kinda have built. Wednesday keeping a dark secret and Morticia knowing it would also be insane. I could see maybe Wednesday drew what she saw or someone drew a prediction??? If Morticia is a dove I don’t see how she would see a *dark* vision like Wednesday unless it has some sort of good ending. But I guess that also depends on Morticias definition of good. I’m trying to think about who drew in the journal is what I’m getting at. Like Morticia snooped and found something about her daughter and is now warning her about keeping secrets or something ridiculous. there could also be a thing about the Ravens being hurt/dying painfully because of their visions and that is the dark secret. That could explain the graves as well. It did say Addams, and it could be an old Addams but it also could be wednesday.
I know a lot of people talked about the Enids grave. Spoiler if you haven’t seen that— sorry. It definitely has to be in a vision(Dear god I hope) but if it’s in the same graveyard as the addams one I can maybe guess that she has a vision they ALL die ??? And I mean like everyone she cares about. Or maybe just the people she cares for the most. Her family, and Enid. Obviously.
This has been really long- sorry. I don’t really have anyone to talk to about Wednesday so I guess I took the chance and ran with it dhdhdh all my thoughts are really dumb and don’t really hold any ground but there they are!
Thank you for the message and all the nice words! I really appreciate them!
#fadingmoon fics#fadingmoon asks#wenclair#wednesday season 2#wednesday theories#wednesday netflix#my theories are awful#I have half a brain cell and a dream ok
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I am a SUCKER for enemies to lovers
So hear me out, reader is part of the mantis crew as a healer and for some reason cal and them just don’t get along. at. all. And maybe like, they put their differences aside for the sake of getting the holocron first (not without some tension and snipping at each other) but after that’s over, neither of them have anything to take their mind off the other so they end up sniping at each other and getting into arguments a lot more often and eventually reader storms off after cal had said something particularly scathing and she maybe gets into trouble in some way? Like she’s not the best at fighting but then her blaster jams up and she thinks she’s done for but cal had followed her and saves her? Anyway, it all ends in a super heated kiss? Idk just a thought lol
(If you did write this, could reader be short? Like I’m 5’2” and I don’t see many fics where my height is represented? If that makes sense? And since I headcanon cal as six foot..)
Anyway sorry for the longish request! Just thought I’d drop in something lol
Have a good day/night!!
Can't Stand to be With(out) You
summary: after getting on everyone’s nerves with their bickering, Cal and reader are put in time-out to finally make up.
relationship: Cal Kestis x gn!reader
warnings: second hand embarrassment, making out
word count: 3k
A/N: to be frank, this was one of the hardest Cal fics to write. the request and idea in itself is great and i’ve been trying to come up with something since the moment you sent it in, but it’s been SO hard to find a way to convincingly portray cal like someone reader doesn't get along with because i literally love him sm i can’t imagine him ever being anything other than a sweetheart with the people he cares about 😭 so yeah i hope i did your request justice!<3 i love short!reader so please do send in some more for cal when i open reqs :’)
[all masterlists] 🪶 [star wars masterlist] 🪶 [ao3]
(english is not my first language. constructive criticism and grammar corrections are very appreciated!)
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
Ever since the holocron was retrieved and destroyed, some deeper troubles seem to be coming to the surface amongst the Mantis crew. Or rather, between you and Cal specifically. Cere decided that the team should lie low for some time until comm chatter about them calms down again, so you currently find yourself on a moon somewhere in the Outer Rim.
Cal and you accompanied Greez to the local market to get provisions, and even in small things like these, you notice how much friction has bubbled up between you and the redhead.
If you’re being honest with yourself, you’re so tired of Cal’s way of going about things. The way he always goes in sabres and blasters-a-blazin’ instead of strategising a little more. That one time he literally jumped off the Mantis mid-flight on Kashyyyk? Absolutely insane.
Cal seems to think that stims or bacta will cure anything. He comes up so beat up sometimes that you’ve questioned his self-preservation instincts more than once. You give him a piece of your mind as well when he comes back to the Mantis like this, that he has to better take care of himself out there, as one day he might be so injured, he might not make it back in time for you to patch him up again.
He suggested that the solution might be to take you with him, and for a low stake reconnaissance mission he did drag you along, but you both quickly realised that that was not your strong suit. You know he probably didn’t mean to, but still, he made you feel like you were slowing him down. And you were pretty helpless against local fauna and enemies, still not completely skilled at shooting your blaster, since you had never had to use one before.
And if that didn’t make you feel pretty useless that day, then you had to swallow your pride and ask him to get some supplies from the top shelf, as you’re too short to reach. This was, unfortunately, not a rare occurrence. And while he never openly made fun of your height, this was just a reminder of yet another aspect where he was “superior” to you.
Bringing your focus back to the task at hand, you point to a basket of fruits, saying that you should get some. Meanwhile, Cal is looking at some pre-packaged food instead of fresh produce; he vouches for practicality, while you insist you should focus on nutrition. Greez rolls his eyes as you butt heads for what seems like the hundredth time today.
Merely seeing Cal’s face brings up anger in you now. Your mind trails off again as he goes on about ration bars, thinking about how insufferable he is. The way he thinks the whole weight of the galaxy resides on his shoulders; what’s up with that? He is so harsh with himself when something doesn't go as planned. And then the whole team has to deal with his sulking.
Having had enough of your antics, Greez sends you both back to camp to cool off while he takes care of the food.
“And by the time we’re back, you better be best friends!” he calls as you leave the market.
Cere is currently elsewhere with Merrin getting intel. As you’re both walking side by side in spiteful silence, Cal takes out his comlink, hitting up Cere and asking if he can join her. The gall of this guy! You shoot him an incredulous look. Cere says no, however, and in a hushed voice makes it clear that she, too, is fed up with your bickering, so you should make up already. Then she hangs up.
The whole walk back, Cal is restless and frustrated. He claims to be stuck on the moon, and he feels like they’re losing time, that he could be doing something.
You stop dead in your tracks, and he looks back at you questioningly.
“You're always going on about doing more and more. Why can’t you take a break and be happy about what you’ve already accomplished?” you blurt out, unable to hold back any more. “You’ve saved all those kids on the holocron list. In the past months, you’ve almost died so many times I’ve lost count. I understand the cause, but you’ve neglected yourself for too long. Heal and rest properly so you can still go out there to do… whatever it is you do.”
You regret your poor choice of words the moment they come out of your mouth. You didn’t mean to downplay Cal’s actions and the danger he gets himself into to save people or get intel. But at the end of the day, you don't actually know exactly what he does and how. You only see the end result in the state he comes back in.
“‘Whatever I do’?” he repeats incredulously with a scoff. “What do you think I do? I’m sorry I can’t stay inside the ship all the time playing nurse.”
Whatever intention you had of backtracking and rephrasing is thrown out the window. His words sting.
“Playing…?”
You haven't told him about the nightmares plaguing you, where you see him over and over, bleeding out, falling to his death, unable to rescue him. He dies in your arms every time.
But you’re not about to tell him that. So you storm off. Where to, doesn’t matter, you just need to get away from him.
You can hear Cal calling out to you as he tries to keep up with your hasty pace, navigating through the maze of narrow passages that make up the village. At some point, you manage to lose him after squeezing through a rather small opening in the wall, and you stop to catch your breath. Your mind is reeling, and there are so many things you want to tell him but know will get you nowhere. The team wants, needs you to make up to function properly again, and you know it. You’re aware it’s not just him but you as well who has become extremely irritable, causing the team morale to sink considerably.
Leaning back against the brick wall, you groan in frustration. Why does it always have to be you to give in, and swallow your pride and words for the sake of a moment of peace on the Mantis? It’s not fair.
As you’re mulling over this, you don’t hear the steps quickly getting closer. By the time you realise what’s happening, a bandit is standing in front of you, holding a knife in his hand. You don’t really have anything to give him, so you quickly push yourself off the wall and make a run for it. Turning around mid-run, you try to shoot at the bandit, but of course your blaster gets jammed, so you throw it at him instead. The guy easily dodges the weapon, quickly closing the distance between you two.
When he inevitably reaches you, he harshly grabs onto your arm, bringing you to a forceful stop and slamming you against the wall. There’s a blur of lights as Cal appears out of seemingly thin air, fighting off the bandit, who quickly escapes with a yelp of fear.
You shake your head at Cal’s actions, so much for “lying low”; here he is, yet again, sabre out.
“Put that thing away before someone else sees,” you reprimand him, looking around the passage, but luckily there’s no one.
Cal retracts his weapon, clipping it back to his belt, hidden under his coat. He looks around one last time to make sure the coast is clear, then turns to you with a frown, surely to scold you, but whatever he was going to say dissipates, as does his anger, his face instead morphing into worry.
”You’re bleeding,” he points out, his hand coming up to your temple. But you swat him away, hissing as you touch the wound caused by getting slammed face-first into a brick wall. You look at the blood on your fingertips accusingly, like it’s to blame for this whole situation.
You walk back to camp in silence, not without retrieving your blaster that you threw a couple streets further back. Cal follows a couple of steps behind you, and you don’t look back at him once.
When you arrive, you’re glad to see the rest of the team hasn’t come back yet. You get your things and go to the refresher to use the mirror to patch yourself up. Cal wants to help, but you swat his hand away for the second time that day. So he leaves you alone to clean your wound and apply some bacta, then you place a little gauze over it.
When you come back out, you find him sitting on his bunk, and he calls you to him, so you sit next to him, both of you surrounded by uncomfortable silence until he speaks.
”About what I said earlier–“
“Don’t,” you cut him off, shaking your head. “You’re so concerned about the entire galaxy out there that you forget the people right here with you.”
“What do you mean?” He looks at you, offended.
The sound you produce is something between a scoff and a groan of frustration, starting to turn away.
“I don’t forget about any of you!” he remarks, gently holding your shoulders to make you face him. “I couldn’t do this without you, and if anything, we’re doing this also for ourselves. Because we can, and others out there don’t have the chance to fight back.”
“Ugh!” You free yourself of his hold and stand up, pacing up and down in front of him. “You’re like, this all powerful being of legends, moving stuff with your mind, effortlessly picking your enemies off, while I'm back here, worrying about you to the point I can't sleep. All the time, but especially ever since we destroyed the holocron, you go around picking fights, going after imps without thinking of the consequences that could have for the rest of us!”
He looks at you, and you can feel your whole body shaking.
“Is that what you’re worried about?” he asks. “Nothing will happen to any of you, I’ll protect you.”
“But what if you can't!” Now you’re close to tears, sitting back down on his cot, looking up at him almost pleadingly. “What if you don’t come back?! Do you know how terrified I’ve been every time you left and I didn’t know what state you’d come back in, if at all?”
“Wha–”
This time, it’s your hands that come up to his shoulders, and you shake him back and forth lightly to emphasise your words.
“You say you’ll protect us, but who’s protecting you, Cal? I can’t go out there with you, we’ve already established that. But what if you need me? What if I can’t get to you in time? I could never forgive myself.”
“You’ve got it all wrong,” he says, taking your hands in his and giving them a reassuring squeeze. “The reason I can go out there in the first place is because I know you’re safe, and that you’ll be here when I come back.”
“That’s not sustainable at all,” you say with a huff.
“It’s worked this far, though, hasn’t it?”
There is a moment of silence as you hold each other’s gaze, and while you’ve seen his eyes a million times, for the first time you realise just how deep of a blue they hold. Were they always this beautiful?
“So all this time, you’ve been worried about me?” he asks almost shyly.
“Obviously,” you answer.
“I thought you disliked me. Some days even hated me.”
“What? No. I mean–”
He raises his brow questioningly, and as you’re trying to formulate an answer that encompasses that some days you can’t stand him but he, in fact, means so much to you, you look down at your hands still in his, and he holds onto them even tighter, as if scared that you might let go.
“I mean, I, uhm,” you stumble over your words, looking back at up him, aware of the heat spreading on your face. “We’ve been part of this crew for a while now. I guess I’ve become rather… fond of you. As a colleague, you know.”
“Colleagues, huh,” he says, and a grin spreads on his face, an adorable blush adorning his freckled cheeks. “That’s too bad, because I think I just realised I, uh, like you. A lot, actually.”
You can’t help but laugh at the timing of such a confession.
“To think that all this time we were giving each other such a hard time,” you say, shaking your head.
“Maybe it’s better that way, though.”
“How so?” you ask.
“Had I known back then, it would have been infinitely harder to leave for missions. I know it certainly will be from now on.”
“I could still join you,” you joke, and you both laugh, knowing that that’s a bad idea for a multitude of reasons.
“Absolutely not. I’m not putting you in danger,” he says, his hands momentarily letting go of yours to gingerly run up and down your arms as he looks lost in thought, cherishing this moment. Then his eyes snap back to yours as if he suddenly remembered something.
“You said earlier you're so worried that you can’t sleep?”
“Ah, well, yeah,” you say with a slight shrug, trying to brush it off. “I’ve been having some nightmares, but nothing serious.”
Cal gives you a deadpan expression.
“Yeah well, you know,” you try to come up with an explanation that holds the least amount of detail as possible. All the while, his soft caresses seem to light your whole body on fire. “You’ve come back pretty bruised at times. I was, am, scared that one day I won’t be able to patch you back up.”
“Believe it or not, I do know my limits. I wouldn't ever put myself in actual danger if I knew I was in over my head.”
“And I believe you. What I'm worried about is your ability to assess the situation.”
“Ouch,” he chuckles. “Maybe I can just see more from where I stand.”
You narrow your eyes at him.
“Do you mean through the Force, or are you actually calling me short right now?”
He grins.
“Oh, you better watch out for your kneecaps, young man, they might go missing one night!”
“Yeah? I’d like to see you try… shortie.”
“Oh, that’s it!”
You play wrestle him, and he scoots further back onto the cot, so you follow, throwing half-hearted swipes at him, until you realise that you ended up climbing on top of him.
“Ah, sorry–” you apologise, trying to lift yourself off of him, but he holds you down, bringing you closer by your hips so you’re straddling him, and he sits up with you on his lap.
“It’s not just blind arrogance, by the way,” he says, bringing his hand up to run his knuckles over your jaw. “I trust the Force and my Master’s teachings more than I trust myself. They haven't failed me yet. I'm here. I’ll be here tomorrow, and the day after. So please, the last thing I want is for you to lose sleep over me.”
“I’ll try.”
Cal properly cups your face with both his hands now, and you place yours over his, leaning into his touch. Your faces start inching closer, like a magnetic force is pulling you together.
“It might help if you’re there when I fall asleep, though,” you whisper, lips ghosting over his. “Just a hypothesis.”
“I’m sure that can be arranged.”
When he finally kisses you, it’s like all the pieces of a puzzle fall into place. Everything makes sense now; the tension between you two, which had been there from the very beginning, was and had always been attraction. Disguised as snarky comments, arguments, glares and grumbles; in the end, you’d always find yourselves together, seeking out each other’s company.
As this realisation hits you, you feel a weight being lifted from your shoulders. But there’s a different weight on you now, one that you welcome, as Cal pushes you onto your back on his cot, climbing on top of you. He kisses you with desperation, as if making up for lost time, and you pull him closer, but it’s not enough. Everything you feel, taste, and breathe is Cal, and you don’t want this moment to end. He breaks the kiss momentarily for some much-needed oxygen, and attacks your throat instead. You bring one hand to your mouth in an attempt to stop the sounds threatening to escape, but it doesn’t work, and they only spur him on. Bringing his lips back to yours, his tongue finds your own. He snakes an arm around your back, further arching into him.
Suddenly, Cal flinches in surprise and pulls back, leaning on his elbows on either side of you.
“W-what?” you ask, out of breath.
“Cere is outside,” he merely says, a violent blush going from the tip of his ears all the way down to his neck.
“How do you…?”
“She was, uh, checking in, to see if we were here,” he says, unable to look at you.
“Well, can you tell her to… wait a bit longer?” you ask, running your fingers through his copper hair. His eyes find yours again and he tilts his head to the side, a smug smile starting to spread on his lips.
“Hm… You’re cute when you’re needy,” he says.
“Shut up,” you say with no snark whatsoever, chuckling.
“Maybe we can take this somewhere else,” Cal proposes, leaving a trail of small kisses on your jaw. “There’s a pretty good spot up by the hills, it has a nice view.”
“Should we pack some dinner too?”
He takes a moment to look down at you underneath him, then smiles with hungry eyes, towering over you.
“Good idea, I’m starving.”
— — — — —
Meanwhile, outside: Cere pinching the bridge of her nose with a groan, Greez giving her a confused look, while Merrin looks strangely proud.
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