#i’m sure she didn’t even mean anything by it!!!! but like. it felt like a fucking sucker punch

[stargirllanaa]

Death Grips. III - R.C

Dark!Frat!Rafe Cameron x f!reader

Warnings: Dv( physical abuse),NONCON, Mentions of Dv, Cheating, mentions of cheating, abusive relationship, gaslighting, manipulation, frat!rafe, blackmail, emotional abuse, underage drinking, he’s an asshole guys

Summary: inspired by ‘death grips’ by Etta Marcus/ After a messy break up with Rafe Cameron your freshman year of college, he can’t seem to leave you alone. Whether you’re awake or asleep

Series Masterlist

A/n: hey guys, I just got back from out of the country so this took me a little longer than I wanted it to but hope u enjoy and pls leave feedback and lmk how u like it whether it’s an anonymous ask, reblog or comment I do read all feedback and try to incorporate what you guys suggest!

Part: III

…….

The beach was alive with noise and chaos. Voices carried across the sand, blending with the pounding of the waves and the crackle of the bonfire. The night should have felt carefree and fun even, but as soon as you saw Rafe leaning against a log near the fire, his easy laugh cutting through the hum of the crowd, it was like every muscle in your body locked up.

You froze, but Mia nudged you forward, oblivious—or maybe just willfully blind. “Come on,” she said with a grin, already scanning the crowd for Topper. “He’s not going to do anything. Just stick with me.”

You didn’t respond. Your eyes stayed locked on Rafe as he glanced up and noticed you. His reaction was immediate—his laugh froze mid-sound, his blue eyes narrowing just slightly before he recovered. He raised his beer in a lazy toast, smirking in your direction.

Mia didn’t notice. “See? He’s being chill. You’re fine,” she said breezily, dragging you toward the fire.

But you didn’t feel fine.

At first, you stayed on the outskirts, keeping your distance and nursing the drink someone shoved into your hand. You told yourself you were just being paranoid, that Rafe wasn’t paying any attention to you. But it was impossible to shake the feeling of his eyes brushing over you whenever you moved too close to the firelight.

It wasn’t long before he was beside you.

“Hey,” he said, his voice casual, almost soft.

You didn’t look at him. “What do you want?”

“I’m not trying to bother you,” he said quickly, hands raised as if to show he meant no harm. “I just—look, I wanted to say I’m sorry. For everything.”

You stiffened. “What?”

“I mean it,” Rafe said, his voice dropping. “I know I messed up. I’ve been… I don’t know. Trying to figure my shit out.” He took a step closer, his gaze steady. “I just want us to be cool. That’s all.”

“Cool,” you repeated flatly. “Right. Sure.”

You wanted to walk away, to shut him down and make it clear he wasn’t welcome. But something in his tone—his softness, his willingness to admit fault made you hesitate. It wasn’t like him.

“I mean it,” he said again, holding your gaze. “You don’t have to forgive me, but I don’t want things to be like this. It doesn’t have to be so… heavy.”

You didn’t answer. You couldn’t trust him. He’d proven that over and over. But he didn’t press. He just lingered, staying close but not too close, offering you drinks every time your cup got low.

You didn’t realize how much you’d had to drink until you were laughing at something—God knows what—with a girl you barely knew. The firelight blurred, the edges of the world softening as the alcohol worked its way through your system.

Rafe wasn’t far, leaning against a log a few feet away, his eyes on you.

“You’re finally relaxing,” he said, his voice light as he moved closer.

You rolled your eyes. “Don’t make it weird.”

He smirked, holding his hands up in surrender. “Not trying to. Just saying it’s nice to see you like this. You’re always so tense around me.”

“Damn, I wonder why,” you shot back, though your words were starting to slur.

He laughed, low and warm. “Fair point.”

Before you could respond, he tilted his head toward the darker stretch of beach beyond the fire. “Let’s go for a walk. Too loud here.”

“No thanks,” you said immediately, shaking your head.

“Come on,” he pressed, his tone light but insistent. “I’m not gonna hurt you. I just want to talk. No bullshit, I promise.”

You hesitated. Part of you screamed to stay by the fire, to not let him pull you away from the safety of the crowd. But the alcohol muffled your thoughts, loosening your grip on the fear that always kept you guarded around him.

Against your better judgment, you nodded.

The sound of the party faded as you walked, the waves swallowing the noise until it was just the two of you under the moonlight. You stumbled slightly, the uneven sand throwing you off balance, but Rafe’s hand steadied you.

“Careful,” he murmured, his voice closer than you realized.

“I’m fine,” you muttered, shrugging off his hand.

He didn’t let go immediately, his fingers lingering on your arm for a moment too long before he finally stepped back.

When you stopped walking, he turned to face you, his expression unreadable.

“I miss you,” he said softly.

You blinked, the words not quite registering at first. “What?”

“I miss us,” he said, his voice low and almost vulnerable. “I know I screwed up. I know I hurt you. But I want to fix it.”

You stared at him, the alcohol dulling your initial burst of anger. “Are you serious?”

“I’m not asking you to forget everything,” he said quickly. “I just—I want another chance. I can be better. I know I can.”

You laughed, sharp and bitter. “Another chance? Are you insane?”

“I’m serious,” he said, stepping closer. “I’ve been working on myself. I’ve been trying—”

“You’re fucking delusional,” you snapped, cutting him off. The alcohol loosened the words, pulling them out of you before you could stop. “You cheated on me. You hit me. You made me feel like I was nothing. And now you want me to just… what? Forget all of that and give you another chance?”

Rafe flinched, the softness in his expression hardening into something sharper. “I was messed up back then. I didn’t know how to—”

“No,” you said, your voice shaking with anger. “You knew exactly what you were doing. You always knew. And you loved it.”

“Don’t act like you didn’t have a part in it,” he said, his voice rising. “You knew how to push my buttons. You knew how to make me lose my shit.”

You took a step back, your body trembling. “You’re disgusting.”

The silence between you stretched, heavy and suffocating. For a moment, you thought he might lash out, that he’d grab your arm or raise his voice. But instead, he smiled—cold and sharp, the boyish charm replaced by something cruel.

“You’re drunk,” he said simply, stepping closer. “I’ll give you a pass. But you’re not over me. You never will be.”

You turned and walked away, the sound of his laughter following you as you stumbled back toward the fire. You didn’t care if you looked unsteady or ridiculous; all you cared about was putting as much distance between you and him as possible.

When you reached the edge of the crowd, Mia was nowhere to be seen. Your stomach twisted, a fresh wave of anger rising as you realized she’d probably disappeared with Topper again, leaving you to fend for yourself.

Your hands shook as you grabbed your bag, your breaths coming in uneven gasps. You didn’t look back toward the dark stretch of beach where Rafe still stood, watching you.

~~~~~~

You slammed the door of your dorm shut, the sound echoing through the small space. Your clothes still smelled faintly of bonfire smoke, your hair damp from the salt air, but none of that mattered. The only thing you could focus on was the lingering sensation of Rafe’s smirk, his words still ringing in your ears.

“You’re not over me. You never will be.”

The audacity made your stomach churn, and as you tossed your bag onto your bed, you couldn’t stop your hands from trembling. You needed to talk to someone to make sense of everything that had happened at the beach. But when Mia walked through the door minutes later, her laughter bubbling over as she scrolled through her phone, something inside you snapped.

She looked up, startled. “Whoa. What’s with the death glare?”

“Where the hell were you?” you snapped, unable to hold it anymore.

The smile on her face faded instantly. “What?”

“At the beach,” you said, your voice shaking. “You said we’d stick together, that you wouldn’t leave me alone, and then you disappeared with Topper like it was nothing.”

Mia’s brow furrowed, her confusion quickly morphing into defensiveness. “Hold on, what happened? Did Rafe—”

“What do you think happened?” you snapped, cutting her off. “He cornered me, got me drunk, and then tried to tell me he wants me back. And you weren’t there, Mia. You left me alone with him.”

She blinked, clearly caught off guard. “Okay, but nothing actually happened, right? I mean, you’re here, you’re fine—”

“Fine?” The word came out sharp, almost bitter. “Are you kidding me? You know what he’s like, Mia. You know how much he’s put me through, and you still dragged me there like it didn’t matter. You’re literally fucking his best friend.”

Her mouth opened, then closed, like she wasn’t sure how to respond. “It’s not like that,” she said finally. “Topper’s not Rafe, and I thought—”

“You thought what?” you interrupted, your voice rising. “That I’d just magically be okay? That I’d be fine hanging out with my abusive ex at a party while you played house with his best friend?”

“Abusive?” she repeated, her eyes widening slightly.

You froze, realizing the word had slipped out before you could stop it. But there was no taking it back now. “Yeah,” you said, your voice quieter now. “He was abusive, Mia. And you still keep putting me in situations where I have to see him. Do you even care how that feels for me?”

Her expression shifted, guilt flickering across her face before she crossed her arms defensively. “Of course, I care,” she said. “But it’s not like I’m dragging you into this on purpose. I mean, what am I supposed to do? Ghost Topper because you and Rafe had a shitty relationship?”

The words hit you like a slap, your anger twisting into something deeper—something closer to hurt. “I’m not asking you to break things off with him,” you said, your voice trembling. “I’m asking you to have some fucking empathy. You’re supposed to be my friend, Mia.”

“I am your friend,” she shot back. “But maybe you need to stop blaming me for everything. I didn’t make you date him, and I didn’t make you stay with him when things got bad. That was your choice.”

You flinched, the accusation cutting deeper than you expected. For a second, you thought about yelling, about telling her to leave and never come back. But instead, you turned away, your chest tight with something between anger and sadness.

“Just… go, Mia,” you said quietly. “I can’t do this right now.”

She hesitated, her arms still crossed. “Fine,” she said after a moment, her voice tight. “But don’t expect me to keep putting up with this shit forever.”

The door clicked shut behind her, leaving you alone in the silence of the room.

~~~~~

You were sitting on your bed, the faint glow of your desk lamp casting long shadows across the walls. The air felt heavy, the silence broken only by the sound of Rafe pacing in front of you.

“Let me see your phone,” he said, his voice low and clipped.

You froze, clutching the device tighter. “Why?”

“Because,” he snapped, facing you with a sharp glare. “I saw Bella texting you earlier. What did she say?”

“Nothing important,” you said quickly, your stomach twisting.

He didn’t believe you. “Show me.”

You hesitated, your fingers trembling as you unlocked your phone and handed it over. He snatched it from your grasp, scrolling through your messages with a storm brewing in his eyes.

His jaw clenched as he stopped on Bella’s most recent text:

“r u ok? im rlly worried about u and rafe. u don’t have to stay with him yk. u deserve sm better. <3”

“Worried about us?” Rafe said, his voice dripping with mockery. “What’s she so worried about, huh? Did you tell her we had a fight? That’s cute.”

“I didn’t tell her anything,” you said quickly, your chest tightening. “She’s just… she’s just being a good friend.”

“She’s not your friend,” he said sharply, tossing the phone onto the bed. “She’s trying to break us up. You think I’m stupid? You think I don’t see what’s going on?”

“She’s not trying to break us up,” you insisted, your voice trembling. “She’s just—”

“Shut up,” he interrupted, his tone cold and final. “You’re done talking to her. Do you hear me? You’re going to block her, and you’re not going to say another word to her. She’s gone.”

“No,” you said quietly, your voice barely audible. “You’ve already made me cut off everyone else. Bella’s the only friend I have left.”

“You still have me... you have Mia,” Rafe said, stepping closer, his shadow looming over you. “That should be enough for you. You don’t need anyone else.”

Tears welled in your eyes, but you didn’t let them fall. “This isn’t protection, Rafe. This is fucking control-”

The words barely left your mouth before his hand slammed against the wall beside your head, making you flinch.

“What did you just say?” he demanded, his voice dangerously low.

You didn’t answer.

~~~~~~~~

You woke with a gasp, your heart pounding as you sat up in bed. The room was dark, the faint glow of your phone the only source of light. For a moment, you couldn’t breathe, the weight of the dream pressing down on your chest.

Even now, after everything, he still had a hold on you.

~~~~~~~~

It was late when you found yourself outside, the cool night air brushing against your skin. You hadn’t meant to leave the dorm, but sitting in that room, surrounded by memories and silence, felt unbearable.

You ended up at the campus library steps, the faint glow of streetlights casting long shadows across the pavement. It was quiet and peaceful in a way that almost felt foreign.

“Couldn’t sleep?”

You turned, startled, to see Cam leaning against the railing, a book in one hand and a thermos in the other. His smile was easy, and his presence grounding, making you feel like you could finally take a breath.

“Something like that,” you admitted, sitting down beside him.

He didn’t press or ask why your eyes were rimmed with exhaustion or why you were out so late. Instead, he offered you the thermos, the warmth of it seeping into your palms as you held it.

“I saw you at the beach,” he said after a moment, his tone careful.

You stiffened but didn’t look at him. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” He hesitated. “You okay?”

You thought about lying, about brushing it off like you always did. But the words slipped out before you could stop them.

“No.”

He nodded like he’d expected that, his gaze steady as he looked at you. “If you ever want to talk…”

“I don’t,” you said quickly, cutting him off. Then, softer: “Not yet.”

“That’s fine,” he said easily, leaning back against the steps. “I’m not going anywhere.”

You didn’t respond, but for the first time in what felt like forever, the silence didn’t feel so heavy.

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

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Wanna see more? Check out my fic ‘i don’t smoke’

[bonkaii4]

Mel being an empath

(Okay i just got say arcane has sparked passion in me i haven’t felt for a show and fandom in yeeeears i haven’t written a meta in forever so bare with me.)

Anyway at first watching act 3 the reveal of Mel being empath felt crazy like that’s such a huge bomb that we didn’t get build up on or much follow through but i do think it explains so much about her character. Traditionally empaths are written to be overly emotional or sensitive sort of like telepaths and being smart but Mel wasn’t written like that she’s quite calm and collected her most emotional outbursts are with her mother and jayce and even with jayce it’s only because he’s hurling accusations at her and she still remains relatively calm in her responses. I think her knowing people’s emotions wether she was aware of this or not plays into this she knows Jayce is coming from a place of hurt and confusion where as her mother back in season one she knows she’s being disingenuous with the reasons of being in piltover.

First watch this just seems like a disgruntled daughter and her mother trying to get on her good side but knowing that Mel can read people’s emotions adds another layer she see right through her mother which not only from just being raised by her but through her her empath skills.

also wanted to bring this up someone pointed this out tiktok and someone else pointed out that this maybe because we’re seeing this scene through Mel’s POV and since she is empath she see that Maddie is secretly enjoying executing Caitlyn. This got me thinking about her career as council member/politician I’ve wondered how she got so high up while seemingly not only being the youngest member but being young period if she’s assumed to be Jayce’s and Victor’s age this makes her about 24-27 in s1 which is extremely young for council member which essentially this region’s governing body. Being able to sense people’s true intentions allowed her to know who to align herself who not to, knowing when people agreed and disagreed with her, or when people sympathize with your views, causes, or concerns on certain issues which all helped her advance quickly her career. I’m sure being from a high born house helped but we see other high born houses in council positions but they’re all older.

She also seems to be somewhat bored with politics and somewhat disillusioned when we meet her i mean giving a fellow council member a child’s toy almost like a practical joke doesn’t seem like someone who views politics and her colleagues with utmost seriousness it isn’t until she meets Jayce that we see the passion for change. I think being empath she saw that Jayce and Vicktor’s vision for hextech and Piltover and Zaun were pure and genuine which is why she supported them. I also hate the rhetoric that Mel never loved jayce and just manipulated for her own gain she does everything in her power to stay true to him and Vicktor’s vision she doesn’t push him to do anything that goes against their morals and goals. When Jayce is worried about Vicktor and his absence at the council may lead to she reassures she won’t let them corrupt their dream. Like i said early she isn’t written like a typical empath she also isn’t written like a typical manipulator(if you can call her that) she is genuine in what she’s says to Jayce she just also knows how people work and his feelings on the matter so she’s able to play on that.

Ambessa describes her to be too soft and she tells Jayce she didn’t Medarda standards i think the way she operates as empath is the cause of that I don’t think Mel is welling to corrupt herself or others when getting what she wants unlike her Mother and the rest of her family i think they operate much more cut through in their goals.

Whew anyway mind any typos i didn’t mean for this be as long as turned out just wanted to share revelation i had!:)

[water-to-drink]

Be a Gladiolus in a Field of Belladonnas pt17

“Degenerates Like You Belong in Prison”

(Synopsis): After being captured by Fontainian authorities you are placed in confinement and are forced to come to terms with the fact that you’re on your own

Part 1 Last Part Next Part

✧ Masterlist ✧

(Characters): traveler!Lumine, Paimon, abyss prince!Aether, Childe, Wriothesley, Sigewinne, Neuvillette, Jean, Al haitham, Kujo Sara, Ayato, Ganyu, Ningguang, ???, ???, ???, & ???

(Tags/Warnings): This takes place before Fontaine’s archon quest, gn!reader, harm is done towards the reader, not beta read, possible ooc characters, (if i missed anything lmk)

(A/n): I can’t embed links in post anymore, if anyone has any suggestions or ideas than please feel free to share

(Word Count): 2k

Heavy footsteps echo throughout the lavish halls. A soldier clad in golden armor makes her way to a large door that leads to their Grace’s quarters. With an equally heavy hand she pushes the door open and there she sees your doppelgänger sitting on their golden throne

They turn their attention towards the lowly soldier and the look in their eyes sent shivers down her spine

“What is it?” Your doppelgänger spoke coldly

The soldier bowed before them and hesitantly whispered “Uhh, the imposter… was captured, your Grace…”

“Where are they being held?”

“In a maximum security prison in Fontaine, your Grace…”

Suddenly the room was filled with a maniacal laughter, the soldier looked up to see your doppelgänger doubled over in laughter

“Finally! That rat has been caught! I bet they’re a crying mess!” Your doppelgänger cackled out while falling out from their throne before standing up at full height, towering over the kneeling soldier. “Hehe, you’re dismissed. I have to make arrangements for that filthy imposter’s execution.” They said with an evil smirk that also uncanny

Rough and calloused hands grab your arms and drag you into an underwater prison, which you learned it’s named the Fortress of Meropide

Your feet drag against the iron floor, the guards don’t let you walk, preferring to drag you wherever they are taking you. You take in the surroundings and see that the walls and floors are all made of iron and has dingy atmosphere, you just can’t help wallow in your own misery

Finally the guards stop in front of a door with a deadbolt lock on it, a third guard presses in a code and the door opens. The guards shove you into the room and slowly walk through the door. You look up at them to see they’re taking out their batons. Realizing what’s going to happen you instinctively curled up into a little ball, making sure to protect your head and stomach

The guards bring their batons down on your helpless form, their blows mercilessly and brutal. You don’t know how you were beaten for you just pay attention to the floor, mainly the bolts protruding from it. Examining each unique scratch the bolts have was all you could focus on, even counting every scratch you could see, you were so focused that you didn’t notice the loud sound of the door opening

“What is the meaning of this?!” The strong voice broke you out of your trance and made the guards stop beating you

“Your Grace! We’re just-”

“I don’t want to hear it! Get out before your punishment is worse than it is right now!”

The footsteps of the guards quickly became more quite as they rushed out of the room. You lifted your head to see a muscular man with black and white hair kneeling over you

“Don’t move, I’ll get Sigewinne to look at your wounds.”

Your eyes felt heavy and before you knew it

A small girl with two unusual horns on her head that look soft to the touch entered your room, she looked uncomfortabled in your presence. She slowly walked towards you and stopped by your bed

“I’m going to need you to take off your jacket.”

You followed her instructions and put the Fatui jacket right next to you. A look of horror filled the young girl’s face, you saw a few tears forming in her tear line. Before you could ask Sigewinne what’s wrong she blinks away her tears and starts to bandage your bruised arms

The two of you didn’t utter a word to each other and after she finished patching you up she handed you a cup filled with a strange liquid

“Drink this, it’ll help with the healing process.”

You wordlessly took the drink and examined it, the concoction gave you an uneasy feeling like this drink wasn’t meant for human consumption

“Don’t worry, it’s not poisoned.” You looked up to see the same man from before. “It’s safe to drink but it will taste weird.”

Your eyes felt don’t have much confidence but at least if is poisoned your death won’t be at the hands of your imposter. You downed the drink and instantly your mouth is filled with an unpleasant taste, it almost taste like that awful medicine your parents forced you to take as a kid whenever you were sick

Your parents…

You wonder how they and your friends are doing?

How long has time past since you’ve been gone? Have they filed a missing person case? Your taken out of your thoughts when Wriothesley speaks

“Since you’re an usual case, I have decided that you will be in solitary confinement. You will be given 3 meals a day and be allowed some time out of your room.” He heads towards the door and Sigewinne hesitantly follows him, before he could close the door you see Sigewinne wordlessly mouthing a word that you can’t quite understand

Before you think you a grasp on it the door is closed and you hear it locked leaving you alone with only your thoughts to keep you company

Outside Wriothesley walks into his office and makes a phone call

Half way across the world a phone rings and a woman picks it up

“Hello this is the Liyue Qixing, Huixin speaking.” The secretary spoke with a little hesitation due to her limited experience working a telephone. “Yes, he’s here. Wait one moment.” Huixin stood up and handed the phone to a man with long white hair. “Mister Neuvillette you have a call.”

“Hello?”

“Neuvillette, the imposter is in my custody, they’re in solitary and have way of escaping.”

“That’s good to hear. I will let them know.” Neuvillette puts the phone down on the base before turning towards the other envoys and sharing the news with them

“That’s a relief.” Jean said

“We shouldn’t celebrate just yet, we must take every precaution to ensure that they don’t escape again.” Al haitham stated

“I don’t know why their Grace insist on waiting and not killing that vile imposter.” Kujo Sara crossed her arms

“Questioning their Grace’s actions, that’s almost blasphemous.” The Natlan high priestess joked

“Chimalma is right, we are no position to question the actions the highest among the gods.” Ayato advises

“So who is going to make their Grace, aware of this recent update?” Ganyu asked looking around towards the others in the room

“Their Grace is already aware.” Nigguang announced causing the others to look at her in surprise

“H-how did they take the news, relieved I bet.” Ganyu asked

“They weren’t relieved. I would say more elated.” Ningguang explained while leaving the part out where your imposter looked maniacal. The Tianquan won’t forget the look of fear on the poor soldier’s face as they described their Grace’s features to look almost demonic like

Staring up at the same wall you’ve been staring at for the past couple of days, the only reason you know a few days have past is because of the food the guards have given you

You can recognize some breakfast food items, like toast with butter, eggs, pancakes, and a few strips of bacon. The food is okay, most times the food is tolerable while some it feels almost inedible. You miss the food you grew up with, the smile on your face it brings to your small features

Without anything to do you think back on your home

Your friends and family

How are they doing? Have they notice that you were gone? Have they even file a missing person report? All questions that rumble around in your mind

Another question that you often asks yourself is where are the twins and Childe?

Were they captured along with you? No, Aether could easily open up a portal to the abyss when things get too hot, so why hasn’t he opened a portal in your cell? Have they decided that your too much trouble to save? All of this mess started when you first arrived here, everyone was happily living their lives until everything went out of whack

Perphaps the twins and Childe thought that it was better for you to be killed off by your doppelgänger

Tears filled your vision, you curled up into a ball and cried

You cried and cried

Until you had enough of crying

“I going to get out of here.” You told yourself. “I’m not going to lay here and wait to die.” You stood up from your cot and wiped away your tears. “No matter what. I will get out of here!”

You hear the lock on the door and it opens to reveal Wriothesley. He has a lunch tray in his hands, he walks in and put the tray on the desk in your cell, a pleasant and welcomed surprise compared to the guards just throwing your food on the floor and making it spill onto the floor

Wriothesley looks around to see the baroness of your room. “I came in to see how you’re holding up.” Wriothesley sees your tear stained face and had to fight the urge to go over to you and to hug you, take you somewhere that isn’t this hellhole. He doesn’t know why but he composed himself before continuing on. “Since you aren’t allow out of your cell like the other inmates, can I offer you some form of entertainment? Within reason of course.”

You took a while to think of what you want to say before deciding on something that might help you

“I want a book.”

In the depths of Teyvat, there a sky of deep blues and purples is looked at by a certain harbinger. A sense of nostalgia fills his chest, but before he can get too wrapped up in his old memories he turned towards the twins, mainly Aether who is trying and failing at composing himself

“What do you mean, their Grace is in the Fortress of Meropide?!” Yelled the prince

“That is what our intel suggests, your highness.” Spoke an abyss mage

“If their in the fortress of Meropide, then why can’t we sneak in and take them out of there?” Paimon asked

“It isn’t that simple, all of Teyvat knows that we’re on their Grace’s side and will do everything in their power to stop us. They might even try to kill us if they see us approaching the prison.” Lumine explains

“Maybe we can get one of the lectors to disguise themselves and enter the prison?” Aether wondered aloud

“I don’t think that’s necessary.” Childe spoke

The twins and Paimon turned towards the ginger, Aether stormed other and grabbed him by the collar

“What the hell do you mean, harbinger?!” Aether hissed out. “Their Grace is in a maximum security prison and their execution is quickly approaching, time is of the essence!”

“We both know that the Fatui wants their grace safe and sound, so don’t think I’m not as concerned as you!” Childe grabbed onto the blond’s wrists

“You two, stop it! We’re all worried about their Grace!” Lumine shouted as she got in between the two men

“I know that the news has already reached Snezhnaya, and knowing a certain associate of mine, she’s already has a plan to get their Grace out.”

In the overworld of Fontaine, rounds of applause are held in a theater

Even some roses are thrown on the stage where a young magician and his assistant are standing. The two look nearly identical except for his sister who had cat ears and a tail

“Thank you, you all have been wonderful tonight!” Spoke the magician before walking off stage and returning backstage

There a blonde boy was waiting for them with a phone in his hands

“Lyney. You have a call, it’s Father.”

Going up to the young man, Lyney takes the phone and puts it against his ear

“Hello Lyney.”

“Hello Father.”

“I have a special assignment for you and Lynette.”

Taglist:

@chuuya-brainrot @creation-magician @tartarsaucechi1de @vvyeislazzy @aludicpoet @undecidingfate @annoying-mary @randomnatics @bore2808 @esthelily @yurivision @angelamelamela @chocolatekuns @mmmhyperfixation @legendaryexperthideout @lapinaenmicoche @sinsdumbdrabble @ghost-mint @rebeccawinters @imyme20 @nymphsdomain @sun7lowxr @blackcoffex @itz-luna @flowerpesky @land-of-eternity @deathcvltcivilofficial @d4y-dr3amer @yuriclouds @artwitch @mercy-not-merci @xyaxyn @starxvs @dreamoffireflies06 @desirabletravel @bidisasterforever @dxprived4-starboys @angstylittleb1tch @lhaol

[fortunxa]

I gave myself some time to think after watching act III, and I can finally share my thoughts. Let me break it down episode by episode so it’s more coherent because I’m itching to talk about it. Buckle up because this won’t be short.

cw: mentions of sh, depression, borderline personality disorder, suicidal tendencies

episode 7 — Pretend Like It’s the First Time

This whole episode felt like pure fanfiction and fan service, and I genuinely can’t believe how Timebomb shippers are still standing after this. Throughout this whole episode, it’s been clearly shown how Ekko will only accept one version of Jinx—the easy to digest one. The one that hasn’t been traumatized. How can someone call it love? Love isn’t picking and choosing what you accept, you either love the whole person or you don’t. Alternate universe Powder is the epitome of the manic pixie dream girl archetype for the current timeline Ekko. Would Timebomb work in that alternate universe? Sure, but that’s because it’s their reality. They don’t know anything else—Powder doesn’t become the Jinx we know now. Alternate universe Ekko isn’t faced with Jinx’s mental health problems—he has nothing to pick and choose from.

Do I hate Ekko? No, I actually like his character, but he’s torn between reality and fantasy. Can I blame him? Also no, because we’ve seen his childhood. We can only imagine what damage losing everyone he loved and cared about at such a young age (and so suddenly) did to him mentally. I can’t fault him for holding onto the past (even if he denies doing so), but it is an issue that stands in the way of current timeline Timebomb.

To him, there’s only Powder or Jinx, but she’s so much more complex than that. It’s been shown repeatedly how Jinx is a part of Powder (the whole act I of season 1), and how Powder is still a part of Jinx (until the very end, no matter how hard she tried to get rid of her).

BONUS: The necklace Powder has speaks for itself. A blue rose represents, and I quote, “Unrequited love, a longing for the impossible. A yearning for someone out of reach or a relationship that cannot be fully realized.” Both Ekko’s and Powder’s side profiles aren’t on the same side of the necklace to begin with. They only merge once she spins it.

BONUS 2: Other than “Ma meilleure ennemie” by Stromae & Pomme being an absolute bop, some of you simply didn’t translate it, and it shows. Here are some highlights, specifically Pomme’s lyrics (clearly depicting Jinx):

episode 8 — Killing Is a Cycle

The episode that started to break me. We see Jinx, absolutely drained, sitting in that cell because Isha’s death was her breaking point. No one and I mean no one, showed that girl the love and acceptance she needed and deserved other than Isha. Not Silco, not Vi, not Ekko. Building that beautiful storyline for two acts straight just to rip it away from her in such a traumatizing way—a parallel to the explosion at the warehouse, too? Wow. They were setting the stage for Jinx’s breakdown since the very beginning of this season. Making us watch the hope in her bloom, find something (or someone in this case) worth living for again, be loved and accepted for who she is just to watch it all burn and leave her with nothing again—pure evil.

“I didn’t know your mom was there.” Can you hear my heart breaking even further? That brings me to my next point: Jinx in relation to Caitvi.

After watching all of what Caitlyn did this season, not only to the city but to Vi, and then still believing Caitvi is healthy? Are we watching the same show? Season 1 Caitvi stood a chance, but this? So shallow and underdeveloped. Cait became a whole dictator. She was Vi’s breaking point, too, and the reason why she hit rock bottom in the first place. Jinx saw that firsthand, and she still thinks she’s the one standing in the way of Vi’s happiness? The only person standing in the way of that is Caitlyn herself, who isn’t even being held accountable for her actions whatsoever at any point. “We can’t erase our mistakes.” but we clearly can pretend they never happened, right?

“She’s being held in the bunker while I decide what to do.” What exactly did Cait expect from that? Telling Vi, her apparent love interest—who knows what it’s like to suffer in prison, not even physically but straight up mentally—that she’s keeping her mentally ill little sister in a cell while she decides what to do? What’s there to decide? And who are you to decide?

“I’m giving you this one chance to account for your actions, all the pain you’ve caused.” Is this projecting I hear from Cait? Can’t even tell since she never did what she’s expecting from Jinx, having done far worse things than her by that point. She let martial law take place for fuck’s sake. She used the grey to gas the Undercity (which still boggles me that Vi agreed to it). She was ready to risk Isha’s safety (a CHILD) just to get to Jinx.

BONUS (while I’m at it): Caitlyn would’ve missed the final shot, no matter how much she believed that she wouldn’t. She missed the shot twice right before that: first, when she shot Jinx’s finger off, and second, when she accidentally shot at Vi. They gave us this shot of Cait looking crazed out for a reason. She was losing her mind.

She was blinded by grief, yes, but I was waiting for the moment where she finally admits to her wrongdoings (other than screaming “I know!” while tossing a boat figurine, that is). “No amount of good deeds can undo our crimes.” Sure, and a lousy sex scene can?

Let’s talk about it.

When Jinx leaves Vi in the cell, she’s clearly suicidal and mentally unwell—even more than what we’ve seen from her so far. The dialogue they gave her, again, making her believe that she was the issue all along was just heartbreaking to hear. Yes, it’s Jinx’s perception of herself, going back to her believing she’s a jinx and how everyone close to her dies, but that perception of herself shifted when Isha came into the picture. And like I said, they took that away, so going back to the topic at hand.

Vi just being ready to hear another ‘I told you so’ from Caitlyn when she finds her, and then they just end up having “sex” (or actually, just giving Cait the pleasure Vi deserved instead after everything she put her through). We’ve seen crumbs of unsatisfying communication between them about what happened, and that sex scene in the cell was the last straw for me at this point. What do you mean Vi saw her suicidal sister sitting in that very same cell (starving and self-harming herself, may I add) and instead of running after her, she pounces on Cait?

“But the parallel to their first meeting back in s1!” I don’t care. That’s just fucked up to witness. In what world would Vi—who swears to care about her family—do that? We see her as this family-oriented person, who doesn’t give up on Jinx despite it all, and this was just so out of character in the name of fan service.

episode 9 — The Dirt Under Your Nails

Starting off strong, we see depressed and suicidal Jinx right off the bat. How did Ekko manage to get through to her? Well, it’s not like he would’ve stopped either way. He would’ve kept using his z-drive over and over again until he finally got it right.

What do we gain from that? Hopeful Jinx again, yippee! Wrong. She’s back for her sister, and it’s beautiful to witness. “I’m always with you. Even when we’re worlds apart.” Fighting with and for her, ready to die for her—we saw time and time again how Jinx was never the true jinx she believed she was. She managed to fix things with Vi—and even Ekko at this point—and managed to find and bring joy. That was the true ending both sisters deserved.

What do we get instead? Implying that Jinx sacrifices herself for Vi. Other than the pure rollercoaster of emotions they put Jinx through, making a suicidal character kill themselves (or even implying so) is just plain insensitive. What message does that send? As I said in a comment section, the writers aren’t blind, and they’re not dumb either. They know how many mentally ill fans Jinx herself has. As someone who struggles with bpd too, I related to her character in so many ways. More than I’m willing to share in this post, so that finale just left a bitter taste in my mouth. Speaking with other people who are struggling with their mental health helped me see that I wasn’t the only one affected by it. Quoting my friend: “We need to normalize considering the effects of the narrative on the fans.” And this isn’t to say that every suicidal character should magically get better, this isn’t how the real world works. But Jinx’s storyline had no reason to end on that note by that point. Forced and rushed.

Dead or runaway, leaving her with the “everybody’s better off without me” narrative was just the wrong way to go about it. Plain and simple. It was rubbing salt into the wound, spitting in the face of her development. They decided to end the show with an underdeveloped Caitvi “endgame” when they spent all this time developing Jinx’s arc. And all of this for what? Such a disappointing way to wrap things up, with literal crumbs as hints that maybe she’s still alive.

And the bitter cherry on top of Caitvi’s messy relationship this season, other than the complete lack of communication—Vi comparing herself to the dirt under Cait’s nails. What a cute (not really) way to remind us of their differences and Piltover’s stance on Zaun for the majority of the show—seen as nothing more than dirt. When Sevika joins the Council after the war, she’s still being looked down on. This just makes me sick.

BONUS: No mentions of Isha in Act III was pure evil (no, the paint on Jinx’s new outfit, the bunny ears on the balloon or even Isha’s doll were not enough. I wanted her death to be properly acknowledged. No, I don’t think it was too much to ask for). We got this beautiful found family arc between her, Jinx, and Sevika, only for it to be completely forgotten the moment Jinx reconciles with Vi.

BONUS 2: Jayce and Viktor were the perfect example of bromance. A friendship between two men can be gentle, affectionate, and loving without them being gay. No need for the ship, but I guess that’s the least of my worries.

BONUS 3: If anyone brings up the “beauty in imperfections” monologue to defend the ending, know that I’m not listening. They had such a beautiful show going for so long. Imperfections aren’t the problem here, it’s the plain disappointment.

EDIT BONUS 4: Singed out of all people getting a happy ending was so disrespectful. What a cockroach that man is. Nothing and no one can get rid of him.

Media literacy is important. Thanks for coming to my rant.

disclaimer: this isn’t me saying that the entire season was bad. But damn, do better.

[robbyykeene]

also shannon keene........

Not sure what exactly you were referring to with this anon but I’ll take this as an opportunity to go on a rant about Shannon and her place in this story because man, I have so many feelings about her. They introduce us to her as a deeply flawed mother, an addict who abandons her son for long periods of time without any means to care for himself, who parades strings of sleazy men through the house where her child sleeps, who lets her son drop out of school and turn to a life a crime just to pay the bills. And I’m not absolving her of her responsibility for these things. But when she was introduced in this show, to me more than anything else this all felt like a condemnation of Johnny’s absence. Like, look at what happened to Shannon. Look at how Robby was forced to grow up. How different things could have been if Johnny had been there, for either of them, at all.

But then season 5 comes along and we have Shannon apologize to Johnny. He says he’s sorry for not being there and Shannon brushes him off, says she’s sorry too, they were both young and dumb and didn’t know any better. Except Johnny was 35 years old when Robby was born, and Shannon was what…19? 20? 23 at the very oldest. And she didn’t get to be young and dumb. She didn’t have the choice to walk away, to just not be there at all.

And I think all the time about that line Robby says to Tory, how his mom used to be a dancer. Like, when do we think Shannon stopped dancing? When she met Johnny? When she got pregnant? When she gave birth? When Robby was a kid? Was she an addict before Johnny came into her life, or did that only come after? Did Johnny know from the outset what kind of person he was abandoning his son with, or was it something he discovered over the years and just did nothing about? When did she start engaging in survival sex—because that’s what that was—to pay the bills?

And even more than that—what was their relationship like to begin with? Was it a one night stand? A casual on and off hookup? A serious relationship? How did they meet? When she found out she was pregnant, what was Johnny’s reaction? What was hers? Did she want an abortion, and Johnny convinced her not to? Did he want an abortion, and Shannon refused? Was it too late for that by the time she found out? Did Johnny promise to be there, to be involved? Did Shannon think she was giving birth to a kid who would have two loving parents, or did she already know he was doomed from the minute she saw the positive test? How did she feel about all of it?

And ultimately none of these questions will be answered or even matter, because it’s not her story it’s Johnny’s. And I guess that was always the point. She was an object to him then, an object to him now, and nothing but an object to the narrative. But still. I think about her.

[docholligay]

I have no idea how wild the fandom for Hadestown is. If you don’t know me, if we’ve never exchanged words, and you have BIG FEELINGS about Hadestown that any level of critique will set off, I very much encourage you to move it along. I can’t do Hamilton 2 or whatever. (If I know you I will give you more leeway FOR SURE. I just want to keep strange weirdos out) 

First, I have to provide a little bit of context: I got in on the ground floor with Hadestown. 

Yes Doc, I too, have been obsessed with it ever since it was in previews--no, I mean, i saw folk singer Anais Mitchell perform the whole thing like 15 years or whatever ago in a converted garage venue. 

I wasn’t even in town to SEE HER, I was in town to see a different artist and this was back when live music was a bigger thing and not a dying scene, and people just bought tickets to whatever was playing on a free night. I like folk music, I liked the idea of what was then being called a folk opera. It was instant love. Orpheus and Eurydice is one of my favorite myths, I am from a rural and exploited place, I loved everything I heard, some absolutely glorious poetry going on there. Bought the concept album, forced so so many people to listen to it all the way through. Forced jetty to listen to it on our road trip! Before the musical came out even!

I have been following this musical ever since then. I kind of thought it would never get made! I followed the original version, and then the broadway one. What I’m saying is, I have what now amounts to about fifteen or so years of history with this musical, and all the changes it has gone through, and all my individual feelings about each of those changes. My evaluation necessarily lives within that context. 

This was part of the reason it took me so long to see the Broadway! I wanted the emotional space to feel however I felt about it, even if that ended up being, “I fucking hated that” and it’s hard to have that when someone buys very expensive tickets and a trip for you to see something you’ve been following for years. Part of jetty’s gift of this was “And you can hate it!!” and I knew she meant it, because when you watch something move and be workshopped and change, you get a lot of feelings about it. 

So I can’t really go, “I liked Hadestown/I didn’t” I mean, I have loved hadestown for a very long time. If all you wanted to hear was , ‘Did you like it?” oh yes! But I have at least four versions sitting my head right now, and they are all next to each other for evaluation in a way that someone who has only experienced the broadway can’t have. 

I want to provide this knowledge because my thoughts about it go so far beyond what is currently being staged on Broadway. No, this is not going to be me saying, ‘Everything was better with the concept album!” no, some things are, but this isn’t that I promise. 

Everything below this is spoilery

So, originally Hadestown was a slightly different story and admittedly, one that spoke to me more than the story I saw last night. It was a lot more specific in its earliest days--it was about an impoverished mining town. Hadestown was the company town, underground, and there was basically no mention of Hades and Persephone being actual gods, anything was winked to, but it was mostly about how the holders of capital have all the accountability of gods. The whole thing had a much stronger anti-capitalist framework, and Orpheus and Eurydice were basically naive kids who thought they could avoid involvement with the mine. Obviously, this very much spoke to me. It was matching my freak exactly. 

It is not that now. And that’s both totally expected, and disappointing to me personally. The show now is much more of a, I’m trying to put this in a way that feels less insulting because I don’t mean to be, very Captial L Liberal. Audiences who can afford Broadway tickets will eat up the vague notions of wishing for a better tomorrow and ‘show the way the world could be’ and putting this back into the framework of a story of the gods instead of the utter lack of choices available to people, that the game is rigged from the start, and Orpheus even having this chance is both an exception and a test hades expects him to fail. I get why this happens. Literally every story that has ever been brought to Broadway has had to be made more palatable to a broader audience. The story it is now, is much much more broad, much more life affirming or whatever, and much more easy to hear. I think I would like it better if I didn’t know the story from the very first versions. 

But that was not a problem last night! That was a problem when i heard the previews out of Alberta! So I’ve had years to adjust to knowing that they were going to blame Orpheus a lot more. Which I love that the Broadway seems to have backed off of! The Alberta production really sort of LAID INTO THE BOY in a way I aggressively did not care for, because it was the antithesis of the story as I understood it. Love that they took that back a step. 

Anyway, so, things I loved about the musical last night:

The staging of Wait For Me fucked SO SEVERELY that honestly it makes me forgive like 90% of the things I don’t care for in the final Broadway version, that I thought were done better in other versions. I almost cried, it was EXACTLY what I would have pictured in my head after hearing it all those years ago. It was incredible. I wish I could see it again, and study it. I am thinking about it right now! It will live rent free in my head. Perfect. 

The gal who played Eurydice has clearly listened to Anais Mitchell albums, because she sounded SO MUCH like Anais that it even took me back for a moment. 

I’m not sure if this is praise or a criticism: 

I don’t know how I feel about having Hermes as an overall narrator! I go back and forth on it and have since the Alberta came out. If I were going to do it I would do it differently than it is currently staged. Jetty was talking about how she loves when the instrumentals are onstage, and I’m the exact opposite--I mostly find it crowds the stage while not bringing much interest for me. But in general, i both like it and do not like it, to give a very useful critique. I don’t hate it, for sure. I love the opener for Wait For Me II. But overall I will probably need to think about it for another 15 years. 

Frustrations I have:

 I think I have decided that even for the MASSIVE INSANE BUCKWILD flaw of seemingly blaming Orpheus for Eurydice’s decision, the Alberta is the best version. I think I prefer the concept album on a personal level for a lot of things, but I think the Alberta is, well for starters, definitely more complete--the concept album has some massive gaps in it that desperately needed filling--but it preserved a lot of the poetry that the Broadway version seems to have stripped out while being much more mass appealing. I was particularly GALLED by the rewrite of Epic III, one of the things in the Alberta version that made me say, ‘Wow I am prepared to forgive a lot of horseshit for this song, my god” 

NEVER FORGET WHAT THEY TOOK FROM YOU

They took out "The heart of a king who loves everything like the hammer loves the nail" imagine writing that line and scrapping it, are you HIGH, fuck me running.

And I think this summarizes a lot of my frustrations about the changes between the Alberta and the Broadway. It no longer sounds like a folk opera. It has lost a lot of the poetry of the original, folk music being very grounded in lyric and somewhat less in vocal theatrics. 

Also, and this might just be an actors thing, I did not get any sense that Persephone and Hades love each other…at all. Part of the appeal for human beings named Doc who are me is that they love each other, and they can’t stand each other, and I didn’t FEEL that at all. Like i said this could be an acting thing--I was not overly impressed by our persephone broadly. But taking out her part in Chant II I think also really contributes to this problem. 

This is both the Alberta and Broadway versions: I MISS THE FATES BEING A REALLY TIGHT 40s STYLE GIRL GROUP SOB SOB SOB. In the original, the fates were the only characters ‘outside’ the story, and this was indicated stylistically by the fact that everyone else was singing folk music, and they were singing in this very different style. The idea fifteen years ago was that they actually would be dressed all in that style, but yeah, none of this happens now and i find it SOOOOOO disappointing personally. I hate their stupid costumes I hate the ‘rougher’ style of vocals I hate it so much ahahahahha. If I was going to force Anais to change one thing it would actually be this, even though it is insanely petty and silly. 

The best version of when the chips are down:

I don’t know if literally any of this is what you were looking for but I somehow deeply suspect not. I am IN THE SHIT with Hadestown though, so if you have any specific things you wanted to ask about or have me talk about, let me know! I am just cutting this off now because it’s already at 1700 words and I’m not sure anyone cares that much about my journey with the only musical I can truly say I knew about when it was still a twinkle in someone’s eye. 

(Yeah Doc, I have a question: Do you have anything mean to say about the concept album? OH BOY DO I. Some of it is to be expected like, "Uh, Anais you need the rest of the story here girl." but a huge one is I fucking HATE that she got Justin Vernon, who you know better as Bon Iver, to do Orpheus. He SUCKS. He sounds bored the whole time because that is how that motherfucker sings. I have HATED it since day one. Reeve Carney is perfect and literally what I started my local women's prayer and casserole circle to petition the Lord for.)

[pctcrparker]

With the force the blonde used when she shoved her shoulder, Sol lost her balance a little, though it made her chuckle that this was her friend’s reaction to the teasing. Bea made it hard not to tease the girl. She still wasn’t sure how the two of them had even become friends at all, given how different they were. But somehow it worked. “Ooh, neighbors at the summer house,” she teased again lightheartedly before giving the other girl a light shrug. “The neighbors down the hall are—” She paused, furrowing her eyebrows. “—were huge potheads. They’d constantly order out. One time I wear there were three different delivery guys dropping food off at their front door at the same time. But… Well, I’m not really sure if there’d be anything left.” The two guys that lived in the apartment she was talking about had stuck around pretty long once everything started to go down. She’d hear them all the time. Until one day, she didn’t anymore. She could only assume that they probably ran out of food and left, and then never came back for one reason or another. Glancing down when she felt Beatrice take her hand, Sol gave the blonde a soft smile and a nod as she helped the other stand up. “I know it. We should definitely get down there then if that’s where we’re meeting him. There tends to be a lot of people who like to go check it out - the pharmacy, I mean. There’s not much left at this point, but people still try.” Making sure they both had what they needed, Sol began to lead Bea out. When they moved down to the first floor and exited the building, Sol took a few steps behind the blonde, just in case. Chances were she’d be better equipped to handle that sort of situation more than her friend would. “It isn't a long walk to there. But why’d he want to meet there?”

Beatrice couldn't believe that Sol managed to survive this long. Had it not been for her father, Beatrice knew that she would have fallen apart. She basically did when the world shut down. She was running around like a chicken with her head cut off. Beatrice's father was genuinely the family rock and the only person who seemed to have their head on straight. Rolling her eyes when Sol continued to tease her, she playfully shoved her friend and scoffed. "Don't be mean," she said playfully. "I'm just saying, don't you have like better neighbours or something? I mean, our neighbour at the summer house turned out to be those survivalists. Tell your neighbours to pull their weight," she joked. "I'm ready," she confirmed, grabbing Sol's hand and groaning as she stood up. Heading to the living room where Gucci was, she grabbed her baby and nuzzled her face on his snoot. "We should head out and meet my dad soon," she mumbled. She wasn't sure how long it had been but it felt like it was getting to the time where her father and her were supposed to meet. Grabbing the lighter backpack, the one she packed, she then waited for Sol. "My dad said to meet us at the pharmacy just down the corner to your place. Do you know it?"

[vigilantejustice]

uh. first shift back at work went ok but was intense in a few ways. skipped out on the second shift because my anxiety said capital n no thanks 2 this real fear of feeling trapped in a high anxiety situation for eight hours and now it looks like i haven’t been rostered on this week so now for personal reasons i will be passing away :-)

[corrodedcorpses]

Boys on Film. Part ii.

Pairing: PS!Steve x PS!Eddie x Virgin!reader

Summary: It's been a week since you watched that tape and you haven't been able to get the images of Eddie and Steve out of your head since. Scared you'd say or do something weird around them, you've decided to avoid them instead. But of course, they show up announced just to torture you.

Warnings: Smut (18+), light angst, Masturbation (female), Voyeurism, Oral sex (m)

Word count: 9.5k (god damn)

a/n: Here's part 2!! Finally! Thank you so much for the love on the first part and I hope everyone enjoys this part!! Definitely more parts to come 🫢

Part 1 // Part 3

It’s been a week since you’d watched that damn video. A week since you’d even dared to touch yourself, the feelings of guilt growing each second that past since you’d come down from the most intense orgasm of your life. 

Ever since that night you hadn’t been able to bring yourself to see them, or hardly even talk to them. They’d been ringing you nonstop but everytime you picked up the phone and heard their voice you could practically hear them moaning through the receiver. Each time you’d given them some excuse to end the call early, opting now to just not pick up the phone at all. 

Of course they wouldn’t know what you’d done but you couldn’t shake the intense feeling of guilt. You felt guilty for seeing them like that, sure but you mostly felt the guilt at how much you ached for them now. How you would do anything to swap places with the girl in the video. 

How you wanted your first time to be them. 

You’d thought about nothing else and had imagined every scenario of you asking them to be your firsts. But every scenario you played out in your head ended with rejection. There’s no way they would ever see you like that, you were certain.

You also knew that they would sense something was wrong and you were certain Steve’s charm and Eddie’s smirk could convince you to confess to murder. There’s no way you would be able to keep your mouth shut.

But, even if you did somehow manage to just not mention it you weren’t sure you could be around them with all these new and weird feelings bubbling inside you. How could you stand to be around someone when your whole body longed for them? 

***

Steve waited outside his house as he heard the familiar sounds of Eddie’s van coming down his street, the usual beat of some metal song Steve automatically recognises being heard before he could even see the van. I definitely hang out with Eddie too much, he thinks to himself with a fond smirk. 

He nervously picks at the skin on his fingers as he waits for Eddie’s van to park before jogging down the driveway to meet him. He isn’t nervous to see Eddie, it's you. You've been distant with both of them and they’re worried. It’s not like you to push them away no matter what. So they both decided to show up at your house tonight, favourite takeaway in hand and get to the bottom of what was going on with you. 

Eddie greets Steve as he climbs into his van. 

“Do you think she’d prefer Chinese or Pizza tonight?” Eddie asks while backing out of the driveway. 

“You choose,” Steve mumbles back. He’s uncharacteristically quiet and maybe even a little sad, Eddie notices. 

“Hey, I’m sure whatever’s bothering her isn’t that big of a deal. She’ll talk to us, don’t worry. 

Steve sighs in response, “you’re probably right, I guess I’m just thinking the worst. But what if we’ve done something, what if I’ve done something? Like something really bad and I didn’t realise?” Steve rambles. 

Eddie tries his best to listen intently as Steve goes through the list of scenarios swimming around in his head. 

“What if she has a boyfriend?” Steve questions, practically spitting the last word. He freezes as he realises how that must have sounded, “No- ah, I don't mean like that, of course she can have a boyfriend, it's not like she needs, my- um our permission and I wouldn’t like care, just, her last boyfriend was awful and I don’t want her hurt like that again”.

“Yeah, shit, I hated that guy,” Eddie agrees, brushing over the other awkwardness but Steve sees a weird and unreadable expression on Eddie’s face at the mention of your possible boyfriend being the cause for you pulling away so suddenly. “We only saw her less than two weeks ago anyway, there’s no way she could have met someone that fast,” Eddie reassures Steve, although it sounds like he’s trying to convince himself more. 

“Well, ah that’s not exactly true man,” Steve says sheepishly, “I did see her a couple days ago at the grocery store, right before I called you actually”.

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I said hi and she was weird man, she was looking around too, like anywhere but me as if she was looking for someone maybe?” 

“Oh.” Eddie clenched his jaw as his knuckles turned white against the steering wheel. 

***** 

You had just gotten home from work and changed into something comfortable, contemplating what you wanted for dinner tonight when you heard the unmistakable sound of Eddie’s van pull up your driveway 

Shit. 

You knew it was too good to be true that you would be able to keep your distance. Your goddamn amazing, sweet and thoughtful bestfriends of course knew you were avoiding them and of course they couldn’t just let you. 

You quickly check yourself in the mirror, brushing down your hair and feeling weirdly self conscious in the tiny lounge shorts and singlet top both Eddie and Steve had seen you in countless times. 

You contemplated changing into something more baggy but didn’t have time as you heard a rap at your door. It’s just Eddie and Steve you tell yourself as you open it. 

The minute you see them they’re pulling you into tight hugs, telling you how much they both missed you. You mumble back that you missed them too but can’t help feeling tense under their once comforting touch. 

“We bought your favourite”, Eddie sang as you let them inside, jiggling the plastic bag in his hand.

Your gaze lingered a little too long on Eddie's fingers as he gripped the bag, thoughts immediately going to how they looked wrapped around his cock or tangled in Steve’s hair. It’s not like you’d never noticed Eddie’s hands before, especially with those bloody rings he wore but it seemed as though you were seeing them, really seeing them for the first time. 

You felt arousal pool at your core at the thought of them exploring all over you, inside of you. 

I’m going to ask them.

You jumped as you felt Steve’s hand on your shoulder, realising you’d been staring at Eddie for way too long. 

“You okay honey?” Steve asked, concern scrunching his features. 

“Y-yeah, yeah sorry, I’m just a bit tired I think,” you replied with a weak laugh, “let's eat.”

Eddie and Steve share a look but don’t say anything as you all sit at the table at your usual spots. The spots you’ve all sat in millions of time, eating, laughing and drinking with the closest friends you’ve ever had. Friends that meant the world to you. Friends you couldn’t lose. 

I can’t ask them. 

Eddie and Steve started up a conversation, talking about a new scene Steve had done, how it was “by far one of the craziest”. Usually you’d be interested in what it was but as Steve kept rambling on, you just couldn’t get yourself to listen. Too caught up in your own thoughts as you mentally battled the ache between your legs. 

It’s not like they’d care right? I mean they do this for work. It’d just be like work. It couldn’t hurt to ask at least… unless they completely reject you and you ruin the best friendship you’ve ever had. 

But they did that scene together, they even kissed and did… other stuff and it didn’t ruin their friendship. If anything they seem closer now, it would be the same for you, right? 

But that’s their job. It would be different with you. You’re less skilled, less confident, this isn’t your job. 

Maybe it would be better with you? You’ve known them forever, maybe they’d be even more comfortable if it were you? 

God, you’re not even listening to what Steve’s saying. You feel like such a bad friend. Here you are thinking about fucking both of them instead of listening and having a nice dinner with them. A dinner of your favourite food that they surprised you with because they knew something was off with you. 

How did I get lucky enough to have these two boys in my life?

But you were lucky. These two boys knew you. They knew everything about you and would never judge you. Even if they didn’t want to do it with you, you knew they’d be nice about it. God knows they’ve said and asked you more embarrassing things, they’d forgive you, they’d be kind. 

You want your first time to be them. 

You knew you’d never be able to think straight unless you just asked them. Before your brain could catch up with your mouth you suddenly blurted it out.

“I wanna fuck,” you cut off Steve suddenly, almost yelling it out and startling them both, “me, both of you, want you to fuck me.” The last bit comes out in barely a whisper. 

Wow so smooth 

Eddie all but chokes on his food while Steve lets out a shocked what????

You look down at your lap, fiddling with your fingers as your cheeks flush with embarrassment… this wasn’t how you were going to ask and that definitely wasn;t the reaction you’d hoped for. 

They both stare at you, waiting for some kind of explanation. 

“I watched the tape,” you mumble. 

“Ohhhhh,” Eddie says as Steve looks at him confused. Steve didn’t know that Eddie dropped the tape off, shit. 

“The tape, Harrington,” Eddie explains, “you know, of the two sexiest men alive doing some very naughty things together.”

It finally clicks in Steve’s head what you’re both talking about. “You gave her a copy of the tape?” He asks. 

He sounds angry, you think as shame washes over you. 

“How did you even get extra copies yet?” Steve asks Eddie. 

“I gave her my personal copy,” Eddie shrugs. 

They’re glossing over your question. 

You sink in on yourself further. This was such a bad idea, of course they wouldn’t want to fuck you. The girl in the tape was so confident, so experienced. Why would they want to go for someone like you? There’s no way they’d have any fun with you. 

“Didn’t want her to have to wait until it was fully released and good thing I didn’t. You liked what ya saw that much huh sweetheart?” Eddie says cockily.  

You know he doesn’t mean it to come out mean but it has you on the verge of tears. You feel so embarrassed, contemplating running to your room and locking yourself in until they leave. You can’t bring yourself to look at them. 

Steve kicks Eddie under the table at seeing your reaction to his comment. 

“Ouch! Dude what the-“ he goes to scold Steve but quickly stops at the look on Steve’s face. Steve cocks his head towards you and gives Eddie a look of shut up, look what you did. 

Eddie looks over at you, seeming to only just notice how much you’ve shrunk in your seat. Tears threatening to fall out of the corner of your sad, embarrassed eyes. 

“No, sweetheart, I’m sorry please don’t cry,” Eddie tried to console. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have teased you I just ah, did not expect that.” 

Steve seems somewhat pleased with that and tries his best to sooth you too. “Come on honey, we’re not mad or anything, promise,” Eddie nods in agreement and mumbles out a “yeah absolutely not”. “We were just a little shocked is all.” Steve continues with a laugh. 

You finally chance a glance at them. You’re surprised to see no anger or teasing looks on their faces. They look kind, safe and maybe like pitying you just a little bit. Still not what you were hoping for but you’d take it over them being angry and hating you forever. 

You take a deep breath before finally talking properly for the first time all night. 

“I’m sorry, I should’ve found a better way to ask, it’s just,” you sigh, trying to form the right words this time, “you both know I’m not the most experienced - or really experienced at all- and the little experience I do have… wasn’t the best.” 

Eddie snorts, recalling you ex- douchebag with a scoff of “understatement”. You smile slightly at how annoyed he still is at how your ex treated you. 

“And I just,” you continue, “when I saw both of you, with that chick, and how much she was enjoying it and how much fun it looked, I guess I just felt like maybe I was missing out.” 

“Hey,” Steve coos, taking your hand gently in his,”you’re not missing out on anything, there's no timeframe for when you have to do that stuff.”

“I mean, it is definitely fun,” Eddie expands, “but only if you’re comfortable and feel like it’s the right time for you.”

You give them both a small smile. They’re so nice, but they still didn’t say yes. 

“I’m sorry I asked,” you say sheepishly, “I just feel so safe with you both and I guess just thought that maybe sex would actually be good with you. I know that was stupid because you’re my best friends and I wouldn’t know what I’m doing so I know you wouldn’t have fun with me. I can’t do the things that the other girl did.”

Their hearts swell at your confession, you feel safe with them. But they grow confused as you mention the girl from the tape. 

“Hey,” Eddie tries, “experience doesn’t mean shit -”

“Eddie, I can hardly even make myself cum!” you practically yell at him, you appreciate them trying to be nice but you’re growing frustrated at the whole situation, “I know you both don’t want to and I know you wouldn’t have fun, it’s okay.”

“Wait seriously?” Eddie exclaims before he can stop himself. 

Great, another thing to feel shame about.

This earns him another look from Steve.  “No not like that,” Eddie tries to rectify what he said, “it just seems like a real shame that a pretty thing like you hardly ever gets to feel good, even from herself.” 

You roll your eyes at his trademark flirting but have to hide the smile trying to grace your lips at him calling you pretty. 

Steve and Eddie share a look, seemingly having a silent conversation. You really hate how much closer they’ve gotten recently. 

“Alright,” Eddie says with a nod, “we'll do it.”

“What?” you question.

“We wanna help you out,” Steve explains, “we want to be your firsts, if you still want to.”

You’re hearing things. You must be. The shame got too much and you passed out, this is now some weird and cruel trick your brain is playing on you. It has to be.

“A-are you sure?” you question hesitantly. 

“Positive,” Eddie says while flashing his gorgeous smile, “hell, if I’d known it wouldn’t ruin our friendship I would’ve been all over you since highschool sweetheart.”

You shake your head and bite back a smile. You know he’s joking and just trying to butter you up - but you’re only half right. 

“Well, how do we start?” You blurt out, you want them, need them right now. 

“We’re not going to do anything tonight babe” Steve says sweetly. 

“Oh, right,” you say embarrassed but they both smile sweetly at your eagerness. 

“I’m free Tuesday and Wednesday next week, what about you two?” you ask. 

“Yeah Tuesday works for me.”

“Me too.”

“Perfect,” Eddie says, “so Tuesday we’ll meet here and then we can sit down with you and figure out your likes and dislikes, what you have and haven’t done, and what you’d like to try. Just like we do before any scene we’re in.” 

You’re kind of surprised to see Eddie so serious, all business. But you guess that makes sense, this is his job after all. 

You appreciate how serious they’re treating this but can’t help but feel a little nervous now, you’re not even sure what you like. 

Sensing your nerves, Steve quickly reassures you, “don’t worry, we’ll walk you through it okay?”.

“Yeah, we’ll figure all that stuff out together,” Eddie adds.

“Okay”, you reply. 

Steve gives your knee a reassuring squeeze while Eddie flashes you a smile. You can’t believe how much you trust both men in front of you. 

The rest of dinner went by smoothly. You felt like a huge weight had been lifted off your chest and you finally felt like your old self again. It was back to normal, just you, Eddie and Steve. 

****

Wednesday comes around faster than you expected. You thought that the days in between would drag on but as Wednesday approached you found your nerves easily drawing the excitement you’d once felt. That’s when Wednesday seemed to be in front of you too quickly. 

You’ve spent all afternoon after you got off work frantically cleaning, showering, drowning yourself in nice smelling things, washing your hair, moisturising, your whole routine practically 5 times over. 

You hear a knock on the door, yelling that it’s open as you check yourself over once more in the mirror. You wipe your clammy palms on the front of your singlet top and shorts while trying to huff out all of your anxieties. 

Come on you can do this, you wanted this.

You reach for the door with shaky hands, slinking out of the bathroom on jelly legs. You find them both relaxing on the couch, looking much more comfortable than you feel. 

“H-hey,” you stutter out sheepishly. Their heads turn to you as they hear you enter. Comforting smiles adorn their faces, melting a tinge of your worries as soft heys leave their lips. Eddie pats the couch in between the two of them and you plop down between them, not meeting their eyes as you pick nervously at the skin on your fingers. 

Eddie puts his arm on the back of the couch, absentmindedly playing with a strand of your hair as Steve places his warm hand on your knee. The gestures are supposed to be comforting but you can’t help but flinch slightly under their touch. 

“Are you okay?” Steve asks softly, ducking his head to try and meet your gaze. 

“Y-yeah,” you respond shakily, hating how small your voice sounds. 

“Hey, you know we don’t have to do this, yeah?” Eddie asks reassuringly, “say the word sweetheart and we’ll just hang out and watch a movie or something.”

“No, no, I want to… I just have no clue what I'm doing,” you respond with a nervous laugh.

“That’s what your own personal sex gods are for darling,” Eddie quips. 

This earns a chuckle from you and Steve, your shoulders relaxing slightly at the familiar feeling of Eddie. 

“So,” Steve announces, “what are some of your “hard no”s?” And at the confused look on your face, “what’s something that, no matter what, you do not want us to do.” 

You looked away from him as you thought long and hard…. You came up blank though, how could you know what you didn’t like if you didn’t even know what you do? 

“Hard No’s could be something like you hate neck kisses or in more intense situations you’re not a massive fan of face slapping, things like that.” 

Your eyes widened at that. 

“We’re not gonna do anything like that now! No slapping or anything, yet,” Eddie emphasised that with a wink, “but those are some examples.” 

“I-I like neck kisses… I think,” you mumble, “and if we’re not going to do anything that… intense right now I guess I don’t really have any?” 

Eddie and Steve nod as they hang on to your every word. The care in which they’re approaching this definitely helping to lower your rapid heart rate. 

“Okay,” Steve continues, “anything you really want to try right now?” 

“Umm… I guess I wish I was better at kissing,” you say with a cringe, embarrassed at how tame that request was, you try to cover yourself as your cheeks heat up. “I mean, I have kissed before, obviously, I just haven’t for a while and I dunno I feel like I kind of do it weird I don-“ 

Eddie cuts off your rambling when he brings his hand to cup your cheek. You look in his eyes hesitantly as you subconsciously nuzzle into his calloused hand. 

A small smile adorns his lips as he searches your eyes, his own chocolate orbs darkening slightly as he glances at your lips. 

He slowly brings his thumb up to ghost over your bottom lip, causing goosebumps to rise on your arms. 

“We can definitely help with that, sweetheart,” he whispers lowly as he moves increasingly closer to you. 

You nod slightly. Trying to will him to close the sliver of a distance between your lips. 

“Words,” he whispers.

“Please,” you breathe. And it’s all Eddie needs to hear before closing the distance, his lips barely pressing into yours as if too much pressure would break you under him. 

Feeling a surge of confidence you push your lips into his more. It’s all the confirmation he needs before he’s deepening the kiss. It’s all consuming, years of emotion, comfort and longing all coming to the surface as you kiss each other with vigour.  

You feel Steve’s soft lips travel up your shoulder to the slope of your neck and up along your throat. You audibly shiver at the feeling, causing Eddie and Steve to smile into your lips and neck. 

“Yeah you definitely like neck kisses,” Steve teases in between the feather touches. You don’t know if it’s from Steve’s tone or the kisses themselves but you can feel arousal pool in your panties because of it. 

You feel all consumed by Steve and Eddie but before you can lose yourself in them completely you feel Eddie pull away. He smirks as you chase his lips but uses the hand still cupping your cheek to gently direct you towards Steve. You see that he also has his other hand cupping Steve’s cheek as he brings you both together. 

Steve’s kiss is gentler than Eddies, where Eddie was all consuming Steve is controlled, where Eddie was intense and a little messy Steve is gentle and longing. Eddie’s hand on your face means he can slightly manoeuvre your face, gently guiding you as you and Steve explore each other's mouths. 

Eddie then pulls you away from Steve, you’re about to protest but before you can Eddie leans forward on the couch, dragging Steve with him before crashing his lips against Steve’s in front of you.

You watch in awe as they practically devour each other. You can tell they were definitely holding back for you as this kiss is feral and bruising. It has you clenching your thighs together, longing for them to handle you like this. 

You’re also very aware of Eddie’s hand still cupping your face and Steve’s hand still on your knee, both of them rubbing soothing circles in your skin to let you know they haven’t forgotten about you. 

You whine as you watch the continued onslaught, causing Eddie and Steve to finally break the kiss. 

“This is supposed to be about her,” Steve breathes into Eddie’s lips, faces barely pulled away from each other. 

“Couldn’t help myself,” Eddie mumbles, staring at Steve’s raw and glistening lips. 

“I don’t mind,” you say quickly, as much as you’d love for their attention to be back on you, you cannot deny how erotic it was watching them together, “trust me.”

They chuckle at how breathless you sound just from some kissing, but it only spurs them on more. 

Eddie leans away from Steve then, dropping his hand from Steve’s face to bring both hands up to your face, palms pressed into your cheeks gently, contrasting the fierce kiss he seers into your lips. 

The kiss still doesn’t match the roughness of Eddie and Steve’s kiss but it’s by far the most intensely you’ve ever been kissed. It’s all consuming and leaves you breathless but aching for more. You subconsciously press yourself further into Eddie as you let him consume you. 

Eddie can’t get enough of you either, wishing he’d had the courage to do this years ago. He expertly hooks his hands under your knees and drags you on to his lap, swallowing the gasp you let out into his mouth, lips never leaving each other. 

His hands venture up the sides of your plush thighs, you can tell that he’s holding back, doing his best to not overwhelm you but you need more. You tangle your fingers in his soft, frizzy hair, pulling every so slightly, as you start to timidly rock your hips against him, earning the most beautiful groan from him. 

You hear Steve shuffle closer, sitting with his thigh pressed into the side of calf as you straddle Eddie. His hand travelling up your back soothingly until it comes to rest on the side of your neck. 

At hearing Steve shuffle forward, Eddie pulls back from you again, so that Steve can capture your lips but also so he can take a breather, self control drastically slipping away the longer he feels your body move on his. 

Steve matches Eddie’s intensity, causing you to let little moans and sighs slip into his lips as you continue to grind against Eddie. Your little shorts and soft fabric of your underwear were almost soaked through.  

Eddie watches you both, pupils blown completely black from lust. You rock your hips at a particularly good angle, dragging sinfully over Eddie’s almost hard dick. He hisses and throws his head back, willing himself to stay softer for long. This is about you, he tries to remind himself. 

“We should take this to the bedroom,” Eddie sighs with a shaky breath, desperation lacing his words.

You giggle and hop off his lap, taking both of their hands and pulling them up off the couch before turning to lead them to your room. Boy are they thankful for you going first, their eyes watching your ass jiggle in your incredibly tight and tiny shorts as you walk. 

You stand awkwardly in the middle of the room as they both filter in after you. 

“So, we’ve talked about it,” Steve breaks the silence first, “and we think the first thing should be you showing us how you get yourself off.”

“That way at least you know how to make yourself feel good and it's a real shame you’re missing out.”

“O-okay,” you mumble, but don’t move, you’re not really sure what they want from you and you’re frozen from the fear of making a fool of yourself. Also trying not to think about the fact that they’ve talked about it, talked about you and how to make you feel good without you. But also very thankful that they’re obviously taking this very seriously. 

After a pause Eddie continues, “why don’t you take your shorts off for us, yeah?”

You nod, and with trembling fingers you slowly slide your shorts off. Both boys eye your core, clad in cute cotton panties. 

“These are cute,” Eddie whispers, ghosting his fingers along your bare thigh before snapping your waistband lightly against you. You jump and giggle, ducking your head as your cheeks turn crimson. 

“Hop on the bed for us?” Eddie asks, but it’s more of a request, “Get nice and comfy against the headboard.”

You do as they say, leaning back against your pillows half propped up as the boys come to kneel at the end of your bed, watching you intently. You’re confused as to why you’re not fully naked, or at least have your underwear off but don’t have time to dwell on that. 

“Whenever you’re ready, beautiful,” Steve coos. 

Before you can overthink it you move your underwear to the side, plunging your finger in straight away. “Whoa whoa whoa, hey,” Eddie stops you and you freeze and take your finger out instantly, looking up at him with worried eyes, anxious thoughts swimming in your head, “you just put your fingers in straight away?” 

“Well yeah…” how else were you supposed to finger yourself? 

Steve smiles at your innocence, trying not to laugh at how adorable you look right now. 

“Jesus well no wonder you can’t make yourself cum, there’s no foreplay” 

You just look at them confused. 

“You know,” Steve tries, “you gotta get yourself warmed up.” But you still just stare confusedly at them. 

They exchange a look, wondering how else to explain it to you.

“Hang on I got an idea,” Steve says, climbing towards you on the bed. Your breath hitches as you watch him crawl towards you, very aware of his proximity to your half naked form, even though you just had your lips all over his minutes ago. “Sit up and scoot down for me a little bit honey?” 

You do as he says and he comes to sit behind you, legs outstretched on either side of yours. He softly drags his fingertips down your arms, until he reaches your hands, you go to hold his hands and you feel him smile against the side of your head. 

“Other way,” he whispers and you flip your hands so that the back of yours is resting in his palms. 

“That’s it,” he coos, “now rub your hands up your thighs, yeah, just like that.” Goosebumps started to rise on your skin from the slight touches, running up and down your legs, sometimes dipping in between them but never actually touching your core. 

“Give those gorgeous tits some attention Stevie,” Eddie demands softly, eyes burning holes into you and Steve in front of him. 

Steve complies silently. Bringing your hands up for you to cup one of your breasts, squeezing softly as your other hand teases the waistband of your panties. Everything feels so good and so sensual but it’s not enough. You start to get antsy, whimpering softly and arching into your own touch, willing Steve to give you more. 

Your eyes meet Eddie’s silently begging him to make Steve do something. You’re lucky that Eddie seems to be in a gentle mood today as he smirks at you. 

“Why don’t you show us those pretty tits properly huh?”

“Please,” you whine desperately. 

Steve lets go of your hands to lift your shirt over your head, discarding it somewhere on the floor. You suddenly feel very self conscious but the look of awe on Eddie’s face and the sharp intake of breath you hear Steve take behind you has you feeling more confident than you thought. 

You can’t help but think back to the look on their faces as they watched the other girl on the tape. You feel almost pride as you realise the way Eddie is looking at you is different, better. He’s looking at you not just with lust but with awe and adoration. 

Steve finally brings both of your hands up to cup your tits firmly, nudging your thumbs up to rub your nipples into hard perks. You moan at the feeling, head lulling back against his shoulder and grinding into the mattress to try and gain some friction. 

“God, look at you,” Eddie practically moans, “wish you could see how pretty and needy she looks right now, and so wet.” You whimper at his words, grinding harder and pinching your nipples. 

“Yeah?” Steve whispers, lips grazing your ear, “that feel good princess? You ready for some more?” 

“Please more, n-need more,” you beg. 

“Mmm good girl using your manners,” Eddie teases, as he inches his hands towards your core, hooking his fingers in the waistband of your panties. Your stomach flips at the praise, breath hitching. Finally you get to be their good girl. Steve takes note of that. 

Eddie pauses, looking at you for confirmation before pulling them down your legs once you nod. 

Any previous nerves you might have had at being fully naked before them, especially while they were still fully clothed is gone. Replaces only with lust and your need to come. 

Eddie repositions your legs so that they’re spread open and bent before him as he leans back on his heels between them. Steve finally directs your hand to your core. 

“Think you can do this part yourself?” He checks, “we’ll still walk you through it though okay?”

“Yeah, I can,” you reply. 

“Good girl,” he coos much more sweetly than Eddie, smirking when he gets a similar reaction, “leave this hand up here though, keep giving these tits some love.” 

You nod and Steve lets go of your other hand, it’s all up to you now. You dip your fingers near your core, but this time you run your fingers over it, surprised at how wet you feel as you smear the slick around. 

“That’s it, pretty girl, nice and slow,” Eddie coos.

You finally dip your finger into your dripping cunt, moaning at how much more intense it is compared to usual. You pump your finger inside you, and try your best to remember to play with your nipple at the same time. 

Slowly you add another finger, pumping them faster. 

“Do you usually play with your clit too baby?” 

You shake your head, “it’s never really felt that good.”

“You’re nice and wet, trust me it’ll feel good,” Eddie assures you, “use your thumb but keep those fingers going in your pretty cunt.”

Your eyes roll back at his words as you bring your thumb up to circle your clit. You jolt as you feel the pad slide over the wet bud, 

“Fuck it feels so good,” you moan as the boys smirk at you. 

You speed up your assault on your sopping pussy. Feeling the telltale signs that your orgasm was rapidly approaching. 

“‘M close,” you warn desperately. The sounds of your fingers flying in and out of your dripping core filling the room. 

You vaguely hear them tell you that you can cum before your orgasm crashes into you. It's so intense it has you practically screaming, legs shaking as you drench your hand and wrist. 

It lasts for what seems like hours as you continue to finger yourself through it before slumping back against Steve, fingers falling from your abused hole. 

You’re a panting, whimpering mess as you finally register Eddie and Steve whispering sweet praises of you did so good for us, you’re so pretty baby and bet that felt good sweet girl. All while Steve caresses your shoulders and arms as Eddie smooths circles in your ankles. 

When Eddie can see you’ve finally returned to earth he asks how it was, a smug look gracing his features. 

“So good,” you moan with a laugh. 

Eddie then climbs in between your legs, giving you a soft kiss as he mumbles “you look so pretty when you cum for us little one.” The old nickname has your heart swelling and cunt pulsing. 

“More,” you whimper against his lips. They chuckle at you as Steve presses a kiss to your temple. 

“Not today sweetheart,” Eddie responds, “wouldn’t want to overwhelm you”. 

“But what about you two?” you ask innocently, wanting nothing more than to get your hands on more of them. 

“It’s okay sweet girl,” Eddie coos, “you don’t have to worry about us.” Steve mumbles in agreement, pressing more kisses to your temple and cheek. 

You suddenly remember the position in the tape that made you get to the edge fastest, Steve on his knees in front of Eddie. You need to see them fully, you need to see what you got a glimpse at on the tape. 

“Hey you know, in the- ah, in the film,” you start, nerves suddenly returning. Eddie cocks his head, interested in where this is going. “A-after you,” you nod towards Eddie, “had fucked her and then Steve um… knelt in front of you and um-” you try your best to explain it but you can’t seem to form the words you need. Brain foggy from your orgasm and nerves. 

 “You wanna watch Stevie suck my cock baby?” Eddie asks cockily, finishing your request for you. 

You nod.

“hmm guess it’s a good way to teach her how,” Steve reasons.

“Mmm,” Eddie hums in agreement,  “and I’d be lying if I said seeing you cum didn’t make me as hard as a rock sweetheart”. You look down and blush at the obvious outline of Eddie’s hard cock in his pants, eyes bulging slightly. You knew he was big, you saw it in the tape, but seeing even the outline in person was completely different. You meet his eyes again and he gives you a wink, causing your cheeks to heat up. 

“Yeah shit,” Steve replies, “me too.” That’s when you realise you can feel his boner pressed against your back, causing you to blush even further. Surprised you had the effect on both of them. 

“Besides,” Steve continues, tone flirty, “would love to get my mouth around that pretty cock of yours again Eds.” You whimper at his words which causes both of them to chuckle fondly at you. 

“Hop up baby,” Steve instructs while patting the sides of your ass fondly, “We’ll go kneel in front of Ed’s on the floor while he sits on the bed, everyone can be nice and comfortable like that.” 

You nod as you hop off the bed. Eddie rids himself of his shirt as he sits at the end of the bed, grabbing one of your pillows to place on the floor before helping you to kneel on it in between his spread legs. 

Your eyes wander over the expanse of his chest and stomach unabashedly. Feeling much bolder in your post orgasm haze. You take in the black ink that lines his chest and arms, a few more than you realised he’d had and that you’d definitely missed while watching the tape. In your defence you were a little preoccupied then.

Your eyes linger a little on the happy trail that dips into the waist of his jeans. You’re suddenly very aware of the fact that you’re going to see Eddie, all of Eddie in person. Something you'd be lying if you said you hadn't thought about, many times, since that first week at highschool. 

Your eyes travel up and take in how his curly locks cascade over his shoulders, almost covering the demon that adorns his upper chest. Your eyes finally meet his and you realise he’s been watching you watch him the whole time, an amused expression on his face. 

He brings his hand up to cup your face, rubbing soothing circles in your skin. Your eyes flutter slightly as you nuzzle into his hand. 

You notice Steve as he comes to stand next to you, having taken his shirt off too as well as his jeans, leaving him in nothing but his boxers before you. His dick has softened slightly but you can still make out a pretty clear outline of it in your boxers. The site makes you ache for them, but you know they’re going to make you take this painfully slow. 

You look up at him in awe as he comes to kneel beside you, capturing your lips with his, smiling as he kisses you sweetly. 

“Ready Eds?” Steve asks tauntingly, pulling away from you, already knowing Eddie’s answer. 

“Yep,” Eddie replies, popping the last letter of the word. 

Steve’s hands smooth up Eddie’s thighs, looking up at him innocently. He goes to pop open the button of Eddie’s jeans but before he can, a thought crosses your mind. 

“Do guys need to be, like, “warmed up” too?” you ask innocently. 

“Not exactly,” Eddie responds with a sweet, gentle smile, “maybe a little bit to get hard but trust me, watching you cum and having you two pretty things kneeling in front of me is more than enough warming up for me.” He chuckles with a shake of his head, like he’s in disbelief of the sight in front of him. 

Steve finally unbuttons Eddie's jeans, pulling his pants and boxers down as Eddie lifts his hips to help. You and Steve move back slightly so Eddie can get his pants off fully. 

You watch, mouth slightly agape as his dick springs up against his stomach, tip red and leaking precum. Your mouth waters at the sight, but you wait for Steve to demonstrate. 

You watch as Steve takes Eddie in his hand, gripping loosely as he licks from his balls all the way to the tip. Your eyes flick to Eddie’s face, watching as his eyes flutter softly as he sucks in a breath at the feeling of Steve's tongue on his shaft. 

After licking up and down Eddie’s length a couple of times Steve finally takes the tip into his mouth, sucking wetly on it. You watch with lidded eyes as Eddie’s head lulls back, exposing the length of his gorgeous neck as he moans out “jesus Steve.”

Steve smiles as much as he can with Eddie still in his mouth before bobbing his head up and down along the length, taking more and more into his mouth with each movement. He suddenly brings his hand up to the length not in his mouth before pulling off Eddie fully with a pop and spitting a string of saliva over the tip. 

You watch it drip slowly down the length, mouth opening slightly at the urge to lick it up. 

Steve then brings his hand up, catching the spit and rubbing it all over Eddie before taking him back in his mouth, Eddie’s hand flying to Steve’s head to tangle his fingers in the golden locks. You feel more arousal coat your slit as you watch Steve suck Eddie’s cock desperately. 

You hear pretty, soft moans coming from Eddie. You tear your eyes away from Steve to glance up at Eddie’s face. You look at him through lust filled eyes. His lips parted slightly as his moans fall off them, eyebrows furrowed slightly as his face contorts with the onslaught of pleasure, his bangs sticking to his sweaty forehead. He looks breathtaking. 

Eddie notices you staring, dark, chocolate orbs finding your lust filled ones as he holds your gaze, staring deep into you as he continues to moan and whimper. 

Your body feels like it's on fire. You need to feel Eddie down your throat. 

“Can I try?” you ask suddenly. Tearing your gaze from Eddie back to Steve as he releases the older boy from his mouth. His lips are red and swollen, mouth wet from a mix of saliva and Eddie’s precum, his hair dishevelled from Eddie’s fingers and tears pricking the corners of his eyes. 

“Sure thing pretty girl,” Steve rasps, his throat raw from Eddie’s cock, “you think you got it?”

You nod before leaning forward, tongue darting out to rub along Eddie’s slit as Steve still holds the shaft for you. The salty, musky taste of the mix of Eddie’s pre and Steve’s saliva invades your mouth, you need more. 

Cautiously you take the tip into your mouth, sucking on it lightly. You hear Eddie suck in a shaky breath in response, your confidence growing as you start to suck more harshly. 

You start to bob your head before Steve pats your head mumbling out a one second. You release Eddie from your mouth with a confused look on your face and Steve just wants to kiss it away. 

He grabs your hand with the one not around Eddie and brings it to his lips. Kissing the palm before spitting directly on to it. You gasp slightly at the action, not realising how turned on that would make you. 

Steve then directs your hand to Eddie’s length, replacing his hand with yours. You take the tip in your mouth again, using the other hand to jerk off the length not in your mouth, as Steve had. 

You start to bob your head faster and take more of Eddie into your throat. His moans increase and you can tell he’s trying his best not to tangle his fingers roughly in your hair too, knuckles white as he grips the duvet instead. 

“God, you’re such a good girl,” he moans.  You get a little too cocky when his head hits the back of your throat violently, causing you to gag on his thick length, you hear Eddie moan in surprise before you’re pulling off of him, spluttering as tears prick your eyes. 

Eddie rubs your head soothingly, while Steve rubs your back, cooing softly at you until you stop coughing. 

“Sorry,” you mumble, feeling embarrassed by your reaction. Eddie wipes away a stray tear that’s fallen down your cheek 

“S’okay baby,” he reassures, “you don’t have to go that deep.”

“I just wanted to make you cum,” you mumble, looking down at the floor. 

“Oh sweet girl, trust me you will,” he expels air, almost in disbelief at how good you were making him feel, “you were getting me so close.” 

“Really?” you ask, eyes twinkling up at him. 

He nods with a fond look on his face, “wanna try again?”

You nod vigorously, gripping on to his shaft again. You remember how Steve had licked the length of Eddie before taking him into his mouth. You repeat his action from earlier while maintaining eye contact with Eddie, earning you a low moan of oh fuck before taking him into your mouth once more. 

You bob your head a couple more times, speeding up and making sure you keep jerking off the part you can’t fit into your mouth. Eddie's hand flies to your head but he tries his best to not push your head or grab your hair too tightly. 

His head tips back with a groan, orgasm hurtling towards him after holding back and being edged for so long - not that he minded, he wanted to make this good for you, even if that meant being edged all night. 

Eddie turns into a babbling mess, “fuck baby I’m getting so close, yeah just like that, you’re such a good girl for us, yeah, don’t take it too deep, just keep going like that sweetheart.”

You feel Eddie’s dick get incredibly hard, pulsing in your mouth and you know he’s close. 

“Oh fuck baby, if you don’t stop I’m gonna cum in that pretty mouth,” he warns. You only look up at him, maintaining eye contact as you continue to suck him. 

“Shit, you want it, don’t ya baby? My dirty fucking girl,” he drawls out. 

You moan in response, the vibrations shooting straight up Eddie’s spine. It’s all Eddie needs to send him over the edge. 

“I’m gonna, fuck sweetheart, I’m gonna-” Eddie cums down your throat with a loud moan, you do your best to swallow it all but some of his cum dribbles out the side of your mouth involuntarily. 

Once you’re sure you've got the last drop you let Eddie fall out of your mouth with a pop. Eddie and Steve stare at you in awe, you look completely fucked out with you glassy eyes, swollen lips and cum dripping down to your chin. 

Steve can’t help himself - he’d missed the taste of Eddie too much-  he leans forward, licking from your chin to your mouth before capturing your lips in a sloppy kiss. Tongue frantically exploring every crevice, savouring any taste of Eddie he can get. 

Eddie watches you both, panting as he comes down from his high. He can see the outline of Steve’s hard cock straining painfully against his boxers, his mouth waters as he gets an idea. 

“I’d hate to break you two up but I think Stevie more than deserves some attention from us too sweetheart.”

You break the kiss with a wicked smile on your face, oh he definitely does.

“Wanna help me babe?” He asks you. 

“Please,” you reply too sweetly. 

“Alright, swap with me Steve,” Eddie instructs. 

The boys swap positions and Steve rids himself of his boxers before sitting in his spot on the bed. You swallow hard at the sight of his thick cock before you, much thicker than Eddie’s is and you’d struggled with his. Your uncertainty must show on your face because Steve tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. 

“Don’t worry, Eddie’s gotcha honey,” he reassures cockily. 

“I’m gonna put my hand on your head okay?” Eddie explains, “then I’m gonna move it so one of us is sucking him off while the other plays with his balls and then we’ll swap, sound okay?”

“Jesus…” Steve pants at the idea, there’s no way he’s gonna last with both of you playing with him. You nod at Eddie’s question as his hand comes to tangle softly in your hair. 

He guides you to Steve’s balls while he takes Steve’s tip into his mouth. Steve groans loudly at the sudden onslaught of pleasure from you both. 

You lick Steve’s fuzzy sack sloppily before chancing at taking one into your mouth and sucking lightly. He gasps at the feeling, accidentally bucking at the feeling. You expect Eddie to gag but you’re surprised at how easily Eddie takes him almost all the way down his throat before continuing to bob on him lazily. 

You feel Eddie tug your hair lightly, making you change positions with him. You open your mouth as far as it’ll go before taking Steve’s glistening tip into your mouth. The stretch to your jaw was intoxicating. 

You feel Eddie’s head move up again towards the tip so you release Steve from your mouth, thinking you’re swapping positions again but Eddie doesn’t let you move your head back to Steve’s balls. You watch as he continues to lick all over Steve’s shaft and tip, so you decide to copy his motions instead. 

You both lick messily around Steve, a mix of saliva and pre coating every inch of him. Every now and then you feel Eddie’s tongue graze your own until you’re both practically making out over the tip. You can hear Steve panting and moaning above you. Every time you glance up at him he's watching you both with a dazed, almost pained expression. 

“You guys are, fuck, I’m getting close,” Steve warns. 

At Steve's warning Eddie directs you back to Steve’s balls and you gleefully take one back into your mouth. Eddie takes most of Steve’s length into his mouth, deepthroating him and swallowing, before hallowing his cheeks and dragging his mouth up to the tip . He repeats this over and over until you feel Steve start to shake above you. 

Steve doesn’t even get a chance to warn you both before he’s cumming in Eddie’s mouth with a broken cry, hands flying to both of your heads, holding you both close to him. You’re the first to pull back, watching as Eddie sucks the last out of Steve’s tip with a whine. 

Eddie hears it, and before you see him swallow he’s crashing his lips to yours, shoving his cum covered tongue down your throat. You gasp as it invades your mouth but the sound quickly turns into a moan as you taste Steve on your tongue. 

The kiss is heated and dizzyingly dirty. You’re moaning into each other’s mouths, hands gripping on to each other as your bodies start to inch closer together. You think you’re finally going to feel Eddie’s body pressed against yours when he stops suddenly. 

Eddie could feel himself getting worked up again, and knew if this continued he would have a hard time holding back, wanting nothing more than to make you cum over and over again on his fingers, tongue and cock. Another time he reminds himself. 

All three of you sit panting, none of you willing to break the silence that’s fallen over the room. 

You laugh breathlessly, “holy shit”, you exclaim in disbelief at how the night had unfolded, it was perfect. 

Eddie and Steve copy your breathless laugh. 

“That good huh?” Eddie asks

“It was, shit, it was so good.” 

“Good,” steve responds, “it was fucking good for us too.”

“Fuck yeah,” Eddie agrees. 

“Alright,” Steve groans as he stands up with a stretch, “I desperately need a shower.”

You and Eddie roll your eyes and chuckle at Steve fondly, he sees and give you both the finger while walking back to the living room to grab his and Eddie’s bag, throwing it at the other boy, earning a full blown laugh from you. 

Eddie then stands up before flopping on to the bed, grabbing out to you until you crawl up beside him to join him. He lays on his back while you snuggle up on your side next to him, barely touching each other but close enough to take in the comfort of the others presence. 

“Ya know, if I didn’t know you better I’d think you were lying about being a virgin babe,” he says with no malice behind it, tucking your hair sweetly behind your ear.

You snort and roll your eyes at him. 

“I’m serious!” he assures you, “one of the best blowjobs of my life.” 

You shake your head at him but take the compliment anyway, a smile plastered to your face. 

You lie like that for a while, staring at each other in comfortable silence. Eddie loses himself in your gentle eyes, all the feelings he’s harboured since highschool threatening to spill once again. 

He keeps them to himself though, not wanting to ruin the moment and knowing that wasn’t what this was about. This was just about helping out a friend, so she could be more confident. So she can finally show everyone else the amazing person he’s always seen. 

He watches as your face seems to fall slightly, it’s a subtle change but he picks it up either way. 

“Hey,” he coos, “you still with me?”

“Y-yeah, im fine,” you insist. He doesn’t buy it. 

He gives you the look he always does when he sees straight through your lies, you know there’s no point hiding it. 

“I, um, I don’t know if I wanna be alone tonight,” you whisper. 

You hadn’t noticed the shower had stopped until you hear Steve walk into the room, beating Eddies to reply to you. 

“Duh, of course we’re staying,” he answers. You look up at him in the doorway, drying his hair with a towel and you notice the green and white plaid pjs hanging low on his hips and soft cotton shirt tight against his chest. 

“You’re staying?” you exclaim excitedly. 

“Of course,” Eddie chuckles, “Great sex always needs great aftercare little one.” He plants a sloppy smack of a kiss to your forehead before going for his turn in the shower. 

Steve flops down next to you on his stomach as you roll onto your back, looking up at his damp face and hair. 

“You have fun?” he asks, even though he already knows the answer. 

“So much fun,” you confirm with a smile.

“I think I died and went to heaven when you and Eddie were sucking me off together,” he laughs and you giggle at his dramatics, he’s definitely been spending too much time with Eddie.  

After your laughter has died down he looks at you seriously, tone softening “hey, I’m glad you trusted us enough to do this.”

“Me too,” you reply, soft tone matching his own.  

“And I know eds is glad too,” he continues, you can tell there’s something deeper behind that statement but you’re too tired and blissed out right now to care. 

“I hope so,” is all you reply instead. 

Eddie comes back into the room in his own black pj pants and worn band shirt, letting you know the shower is all yours.

You grab some pjs out of your drawers before having the quickest shower of your life, scared that you’ll take too long and by the time you get out they’ll be gone. This whole evening some sick hallucination your brain made up. 

After you’re dried and dressed you practically run to the room, heart swelling when you see the two men tucked into your bed, facing each other as they whisper softly, Steve on the side closest to your door. They’ve turned off all the lights bar your bedside lamp and have cleaned up all the stray pieces of clothing, all now in a pile at the corner of your room next to their bags. 

At hearing you enter the room Steve rolls on to his back, arm outstretched to you. You take his hand and he helps you climb over him and into the middle of both of them. They mumble hey pretty girl and hey honey and you snuggle up between the two. 

Eddie pulls you on to his chest as Steve snakes an arm around your waist, cuddling up to your back. You’ve all shared a bed together many times before but this time feels different, more intimate. You slowly drift off into a peaceful sleep to the sounds of Eddie’s heartbeat and Steve’s steady breathing. 

Tag List: @andvys @pxrxcxa @wroteclassicaly @eddiemunsonfuxks @usedtobecooler @translatemunson @glorykaterina @bandofoxxking @littledemondani @hellfirebabes @eveatethefruit

[ladyintree]

her eyes narrow in on her,   offended that she’s speaking like that isn’t something on tai’s mind.  it always is,   because she hates that mikayla didn’t get the life she deserved—  free of her father but more than that,  too.   not what actually happened to her.   she wants to ask if she was supposed to stay with her out of some obligation—   but she has enough restraint not to go there,  not when it doesn’t feel accurate.   she loved mikayla,   she loved her more than anything even when they did break up,   but it’s because she loved her that she felt like they couldn’t go on like they were.  she always thought that someday,  there would be a chance for them again — when they were both in the right place — but that never happened.  she didn’t realize then that saying goodbye was final for her.  ❝  that was not my response to … that,  ❞   she mutters in frustration,   quickly glancing to their surroundings,  then back to her.   ❝  i wanted to be there for you, ❞   she reminds her, like it’s simple to her.  ❝  i wanted to be the person you could still come to when you needed to talk, but—  but that wasn’t enough for you, ❞   she reminds,  letting out a scoff.   her eyes close when mikayla admits to never reading them;  part of her always expected that,  because surely,  something would’ve caught her attention,  but it still hurts.  taissa was still trying.   ❝  that’s not what i was doing.  what the fuck?  i cared about you,  ❞    she says,  voice slightly louder now,  growing with frustration.  

 it’s starting to feel embarrassing, the way mikayla throws that in her face.  it does feel like it’s spiting her—  but she didn’t necessarily believe mikayla would do that on purpose.  this is just her own insecurities getting the best of her,   a blatant reminder of how much she’s failed,  despite giving up on the love of her life to try to make something of herself.  ❝  excuse me if i don’t want you to do something you hate, ❞    she argues with a scoff.  ❝  i know it’s not about me.   you’ve made it clear you don't think about me at all,  ❞    she points out, rolling her eyes at the thought,  because even the worst company from the wilderness,  those still alive to run into at any moment,  tai still thinks about them,  so she can’t fathom why it's so easy for mikayla to have let go of her— her wife.  she holds her hands up as she shakes her head.   ❝  no.  good for you, mikayla.  ❞   her words come off condescending,  but she doesn't actually mean it that way.  she's is happy for her, despite it all.  ❝  if you're happy—  good for you.  that's all i wanted.  ❞    she just couldn't have the weight of it all on her own shoulders;  it felt consuming,  like it was going to suffocate her trying to be everything mikayla needed in there.  leaving entirely might not have been the best option,  but it felt like the only one back then.     

her jaw clenches, and mikayla doesn’t have to finish her sentence for taissa to know what she’s suggesting.  but even now, as angry as she’s been with taissa, and even given how estranged they feel—   she still thinks she would do anything for her.  taissa knows she’s alive because of what mikayla did for her out there,  not just physically,  but mentally.   she believes the same is true for her, too—  but mikayla keeps suggesting she’s wrong.   ❝  she—  i didn’t give up on you,  ❞  she corrects.   ❝  maybe you just never understood me.  ❞   but taissa doesn’t believe that, either.   she thinks mikayla would’ve understood her better than she understood herself.  her eyes narrow in on her and she shakes her head.   ❝  maybe if you listened to anything i said that day,  or let me finish,  or —  read my fucking letters —  you’d know the truth.   but i guess you like your story better,  where i’m just the bad guy.  ❞

taissa rolls her eyes,  because mikayla doesn’t need to defend herself for that—  she’s already made it clear she doesn’t care about taissa.  ❝  didn’t say you did,  ❞    she mutters,  taking a deep breath and forcing herself to stand taller,  trying to pull herself together again.   ❝  seems like you’ve been sitting on that one for a while, though,  ❞   she says, nodding back to her,  wondering just how long she’s been antsy to call taissa out on it.   her jaw clenches when mikayla goes on,  because that’s not what she thinks.  it’s never been what she thought,  even when so many people did assume the worst of her before things got bad.  taissa always saw more in mikayla.  she’s also never been loved by anyone the way she was loved by mikayla—-   which is exactly why it’s so difficult for her to comprehend mikayla wanting absolutely nothing to do with her now,  because how did she just turn that off?  ❝  i don’t think you're heartless,  mikayla.   you know that,  ❞   she reminds, her eyes narrowing in on her.   ❝  there’s a difference between being heartless and being so willing to give up on people when things didn’t go your way,  ❞    she adds, ignoring the fact that that’s basically exactly what she did to her first.  

after everything has mikayla on the verge of snapping the way she promised asher she wouldn't. her jaw clenches tightly, teeth grinding together as she takes a slow, deep breath, holding back the rant that's going on in her mind— how it was taissa who gave up on them after everything, who decided that what they had meant nothing out here, like it was just something to get them by in the wilderness, something they no longer had any use for anymore. “ i just killed my dad, tai, ” she reminds her calmly, because it feels like tai's forgotten. “ i almost died. and your response was to— to fucking dump me. so yeah, i cut you out of my life. but you're the one who decided you didn't give a fuck first. ” maybe tai never said that specifically, but it felt that way. “ i didn't read them, ” she admits, keeping her voice flat. “ wasn't really in the mood to hear you try to make yourself look better. sorry doesn't really erase what you did. ” it killed her, not knowing what those letters said, throwing them out before the temptation could get to be too much, but she figured it was what was best for herself— and since it was clear that tai didn't care about what was best for mikayla, she had to focus on that instead, even if it meant ignoring the only woman she'd ever loved.

she looks away, annoyed, because she doesn't think she could ever get tai to understand, not when she got to grow up with parents who supported her, while mikayla only had a man who put her down, who used every opportunity to make her feel like nothing. “ i just fucking told you why. it's not my fault it's not what you want to hear. because you'd rather hear me tell you it's to spite you, right? that it's about you, not him? ” she lets out a cold laugh, her head tilting slightly. “ well, i'm fucking sorry, but not everything has to do with you. ” it doesn't feel like tai knows her, because playing out of spite is something mikayla would have always done— especially now, when most of her choices have been stripped away from her, forcing her to turn back to soccer, because it's one of the few things she's ever actually been good at, whether she liked it or not. “ i'm not miserable, ” she lies, but she's trying to believe her own words more than anything. “ it sounds like you're just pissed off that i'm doing fine without you. ” she's not, but she's learned to accept that, telling herself that happiness no longer mattered, that it wasn't even something she wanted anymore, because she can't stand the thought of losing it again.

mikayla doesn't want to have this conversation at all, but her pride won't let her walk away. she can handle the pain, she thinks, because it's all she's ever felt anyway, but that doesn't mean she enjoys it. “ i was in love with the person i was with out there, ” she clarifies. “ you know— the girl i married. the one i would've— ” killed for, died for, done anything for, but she stops herself before she could go there, feeling like she shouldn't have to. “ but you're not her, taissa. and maybe i was just wrong about you, and you never actually were the person i thought you were, but— the girl i loved wouldn't have fucking given up on me just because it was hard. she would have tried. so i don't know who the fuck visited me that day in prison, but— that wasn't her. ” that's what she's told herself the last few years in her determination to move on— because it was easier to separate tai into two different versions: the one she loved, and the one who hurt her, because that made it easier to come to terms with the fact she lost her.

her jaw clenches again, realizing she fucked up, but it's easy to brush it off like it doesn't mean anything, her shoulders lifting in a small shrug. “ nat, obviously. but trust me— i never fucking asked. ” that's not entirely true, either; there's been a few times when mikayla has, telling herself that it's just because they went through something horrible together, so of course she's curious, never stopping to consider the fact that she can't say the same about some of the other survivors. her head falls back in annoyance when tai, again, accuses her of not giving a shit, because it's not true, and she's sick of hearing it. “ okay, yeah, you got me. i didn't give a shit, ” she agrees sarcastically, because arguing against it seems pointless when tai won't listen. “ nice to know you think i'm as heartless as everyone else does. ”

[shawtuzi]

“She say I’m obsessed with thick women and I agree”

cw include: chubby reader, black coded reader but you can picture her however you’d like <3, slight talk of body image, size kink, drug and alcohol use, basketball player eren bc that deserves a warning, oral both receiving, unprotected sex, choking n a little manhandling, pussydrunk eren, squirting, lots of dirty talk and praise, mating press, sex standing up, backshots, creampie, eren has an abnormally huge dick...i think that's about it///wc: 4.3k

Eren Jaeger was known as a legend on campus. Not only on the basketball court but with the ladies as well. If you had a girlfriend it was common knowledge to keep her away from him because lord knows once a girl catches sight of him all morals are thrown out the window. Fortunately he did have a type; short and little on the chubbier side. Of course Eren thought all women were gifts from god in their own way but something about manhandling a chubby short girl into any position he wanted until she was crying made his dick jump every time he thought about it.

That’s where you come in.

It was a Friday night after a game and per usual there was a party in Eren’s honor seeing as though he carried the entire team through their last game of the season. Eren was sitting on the couch nursing a red solo cup filled slightly with Hennessy taking small sips every now and again (eren is a dark liquor type of man i wont be elaborating). In the other hand he had a blunt pearled and ready and to be lit until he laid eyes on you. “Holy shit…” he whispered, taking your physique in.

Short was one way to put it, everyone in the room was basically towering over you. The tight black dress you were wearing hugged your curves in the best way possible, the skimpy material barely covering your ass. “Hey Con” Eren grunted slapping Connie in the chest but not once taking his eyes off of you, “who the fuck is that.” Connie looked in your direction and smirked, “that Y/N but don’t even waste your time she just got out of a breakup with Jean he dumped her” he chuckled making Eren roll his eyes.

Jean was the schools quarterback as well as the frat president of the house he was currently partying in. Eren had now noticed you were following Jean around like a lost puppy trying to get his attention but he ignored you pretending you weren’t even there. Poor baby he thought to himself his heart wrenching when he saw tears brim your eyes. You were about to just call it quits and leave but Eren was quick hopping off the couch and right in front of you. “U-um excuse me” you mumbled, bringing your eyes up to the gorgeous emerald ones above you.

“Sorry I didn’t mean to scare you I just saw how upset you were looking and was wondering if you wanted to share this?” he smiled holding the blunt in front of your face. You bit your lip contemplating if you wanted to take the risk of being seen with Eren. The girls here were very protective and cutthroat when it came to him plus Jean was not too far away and- what were you thinking??

“Yeah sure” you gave Eren a small smile and he beamed, grabbing your much smaller hand and bringing you to his previous spot on the couch. “I don’t think there’s enough ro- oh!” you gasped when Eren pulled you onto his lap, his arm finding purchase wrapped around your back. Normally you would’ve gotten right back up and just found literally anywhere else to sit but it felt oddly comforting being in Eren’s strong arms. “So what’s wrong you looked like you were about to cry back there” Eren chuckled lighting the blunt as if he already didn’t have a good idea.

“Well…my boyfriend broke up with me and I thought if I got all dressed up he would- I don’t know it’s stupid. He’s stupid” you pouted and it took everything in Eren not to kiss the adorable pout off your face. “Well for what it’s worth I think you look beautiful” Eren smiled passing the blunt to you, “if I was Jean I wouldn’t let you go for anything in this world.” You were absolutely speechless. Was the Eren Jaeger coming onto you? There’s no way.

Instead of responding you took a couple drags of the blunt trying to ignore Eren’s intense stare. His words kept on replaying in your mind like a broken record until you decided to speak up. “You really think I look beautiful? To tell you the truth I wasn’t so sure about this dress” you giggled starting to feel the effects of the drug. Your body image was never really a problem for you until you met Jean, it’s not like he ever straight up told you but the little microaggressions he would make here and there made you a tad self conscious.

Eren smirked, tightening his hold on you, “of course I mean it Y/N I don’t know if anyones ever told you but I prefer my women on the thicker side. A little tummy on a woman never hurt nobody” he laughed downing the rest of the Henny that was in his cup. By now Eren was the kind of fucked up to where he’d say whatever was on his mind and by the looks of it you were hanging on to his every word. “To be truly honest with you it’s probably a good thing the two of you broke up, Jean wouldn’t have any fucking idea what to do with all this” he whispered the last part in your ear making you whimper quietly.

“Can’t believe I’ve never seen you before, why were you hiding from me?” he chuckled, pulling you impossibly close until your faces were inches away from each other. “J-Jean didn’t want me going to your games, but I did go tonight which is probably why he’s not talking to me” you laughed breathlessly, “you did really good tonight I never actually realized how tall you were until I saw you next to all the other players.” You couldn’t help but trail your eyes to his abnormally large hand rest on your thigh squeezing it every so often.

“Well I am six-seven so yeah I’m pretty tall, I’m assuming you’re about four-eleven? Five foot?” he smiled, giving your thigh another squeeze. In the corner of his eye he saw Jean standing in the kitchen, smoke practically coming out of his ears at the sight of his ex-girlfriend in Eren’s lap. Before you had the chance to answer his question Eren lifted you off of his lap with ease urging you to stand up.

“Let’s get a drink yeah?”

Eren enveloped your small hand in his bringing you to the kitchen, completely ignoring Jean. He grabbed an empty solo cup pouring a shot of Henny into it, “drink up!” he smirked holding the cup in front of your face. You shakily took the cup out of his hand and he could tell you were hesitant so Eren being the sweetheart he was decided to help you out. He leant against the counter and pulled your back into his chest. It took all his willpower not to pick you up and fuck you on the counter with everything he had but he managed. “I’ll take this” he mumbled, grabbing the cup from you and wrapped his other hand around your throat making you squeak in surprise. “Now tilt your head back, open your mouth, and swallow” he grunted and you complied making a smile grace his face once more. He poured the foul tasting liquid down your throat until there was nothing left, “good girl” he whispered in your ear squeezing your neck softly before letting go.

You turned around and looked up at him lust swimming in your bloodshot eyes,”Eren” you whimpered clutching onto his hoodie. “C’mon follow me” he growled, grabbing your hand once more and dragged you upstairs but not before shooting Jean a wink, a quick way of saying ‘I just took your girl and there’s nothing you can do about it’.

Eren went into the first room he could find that was unlocked and pulled you in pushing you roughly against the door once it was shut. “You want me?” he asked tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, “because I sure fucking want you.” You couldn’t speak too horny to even function. It was embarrassing. “Haven’t even touched you yet and you’ve already gone dumb how cute. Just nod your pretty little head and I’ll take care of you Y/N.” You were nodding before he even finished talking, feeling your wetness begin to trickle down your thighs.

Eren pushed his hand under your dress cupping your sensitive pussy, the both of you moaning at the contact. “Shit you’re fucking soaked. Good thing too I’m gonna need to prep you before you take me” he growled rubbing your clit over your panties. You brushed your hand against the bulge in his pants gasping at how thick he was, “I’m not even fully hard yet either I’ll let your imagination run wild with that while I eat your sweet little pussy ‘kay?” Before you could reply Eren was on his knees hoisting your thighs over his broad shoulders. Being the good girl you were, you bunched your dress up to your waist giving him better access to your soaked center.

“That’s my girl” he whispered, pressing multiple kisses to your thick thighs sucking on the soft skin every now and again. “Don’t worry about me dropping you either, you weigh as light as a feather to me” he smiled, making your heart flutter. He could sense the hesitation on your face the second he picked you up and had to let it be known now and so on your weight would never ever be a problem in his eyes for as long as you would let him indulge you. “Eren you’re too- oh my gosh!” you squealed when you felt him lick, kiss, and suck at your pussy over your panties, the mixture of your wetness and his saliva soaking the material further.

You pulled your panties to the side to give him better access and his eyes nearly popped out of his head at the sight of your dripping, bare pussy in front of him. “Oh Y/N…” he whispered, making your heartbeat quicken negative thoughts beginning to swarm in your head. “I don’t know if I’m gonna be able to leave you alone after this, you’ve got the prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen…never wanna let you go” he spoke more to himself than you. He licked a fat stripe up your pussy then wrapped his lips around your clit, his eyes rolling back at the taste of you. Sweeter than he imagined.

His shoulder length hair that was usually in a bun was down tonight and although he did look beautiful with his hair down from this angle it was slightly affecting his performance. “Baby” he grunted looking up at you through his eyelashes, “would you tie my hair up please it’s getting in my way” he chuckled, pressing a soft kiss to your clit. “Mhm” you whimpered, taking the hair tie from him with shaking hands. “You’re a doll” was all that was said before he dove back in, bringing your body closer to his face. Tying his hair up felt like mission impossible every time you bunch up his hair enough to tie back he would suck hard on your clit faltering your grip, almost like he was doing it on purpose.

“E-eren you’re making it- ah really hard to do this” you whined almost giving up until you felt a slap on your thigh. “Put my hair up or you aren’t cumming” he smirked spitting on your pussy before lapping at it once more. You moaned pathetically letting your head fall against the door and just when you thought it couldn’t get worse you felt something push against your entrance. “Ease up for me baby it’s just one finger” he chuckled, pushing his finger in slightly groaning at how tight you felt around him. “Just o-one?!” you gasped gripping at his soft locs. “Yeah and I actually think you’re ready for two now yeah?” he sent you a wicked smile before shoving a second finger in without warning.

The obscene squelching of your pussy made your cheeks heat up in embarrassment but Eren didn’t seem to care curling his fingers in a way that had you dripping on his palm down to his wrist. You bit your lip impossibly hard and tied Eren’s hair up sloppily strands of hair falling out of the bun by the minute. “There it’s tied up can I cum? I need to Eren” you whimpered feeling your thighs begin to shake. “Of course you can baby be a good girl and cum on my tongue” he growled bringing his mouth back to your pussy. Within minutes you were cumming high pitched moans and whines escaping your lips, “E-Eren” you huffed out attempting to push his head away.

With one last kiss to your clit Eren pulled away setting your legs down gently, standing at his height once more he brought his fingers to your lips a single to open your mouth. You sucked on his fingers greedily gagging slightly at how big they were. He pulled them out of your mouth with a string of saliva connecting to your lips, “you know I haven’t even kissed you yet and here you are sucking your cum off my fingers…cute” he smiled squishing your cheeks together. “You want me to kiss you Y/N?” he whispered resting his forehead against yours and you nodded tears brimming in your eyes at how bad you actually wanted him.

Eren licked his lips taking in how adorable you looked before pressing his lips against your shoving his tongue in your mouth. One hand was wrapped around your throat squeezing ever so softly while the other was possessively gripping your waist. Eren was relentless, barely letting you pull away for air then shoving his tongue down your throat. A smile graced his face when he felt your small hands pawing at his cock through his pants, “you want it?” he asked breathlessly, making you nod quickly. “Get on your knees.”

You obeyed, getting on your knees with quickness eager to please him. Eren slowly undid his belt then pulled his pants along with his briefs an accidental laugh escaping when he saw your reaction to his dick. It was a well known rumor on campus that Eren had a massive dick but this was nothing compared to what you thought. “Ten inches the most people can take is about half, but I think you can take all of it because you’re my good girl now right baby?” he smiled answering your question before you even had the chance, he stroked your cheek with his thumb looking at you with pure adoration. “Yeah m’your good girl” you whispered, taking him in your hand. He was so thick your hand could barely fit around and he was heavy, balls full and ready to fill you with every drop he could. You started off slow, taking only the tip in your mouth but as time passed Eren grew impatient insisting you needed a hand so being the sadist he was he grabbed your hair roughly shoving more of his cock into your mouth.

“Yeah that’s it fucking take it” Eren growled the tightness of your throat making him want to cum already. His dick was more than halfway in your mouth which made him adore you even more. He knew his good girl could take his cock with ease. “Just a little bit more c’mon baby you do it- fuck yeah there you go good fucking girl” he praised once his dick was fully sheathed in your mouth. You looked completely wrecked. The eyelashes you had glued on were coming undone and your makeup was streaked due to the tears that were streaming down your face. The glittery lipgloss you were wearing was no longer there, the remnants coated on Eren’s cock along with your saliva. His balls slapped against your chin roughly and you made sure to run your tongue over them adding to his pleasure.  

“So fucking good” he brought his free hand to your throat feeling the bulge of his dick and that’s what finally did it. In seconds ribbons of cum were shooting down your throat and of course Eren made sure you swallowed every drop. “Fuck I don’t think I’ve ever cum that fast c’mere” he grunted bringing you to your feet for another sloppy kiss. You brought both your hands to Eren’s softening cock jerking it until you felt him start to harden up. “Mm Y/N” he moaned softly against your lips bucking into you every time you stroked his sensitive tip.

“Lay down…wanna fuck you now” he whispered and you complied taking off your dress before you did so, Eren following your lead and taking off his hoodie giving you a full view of his body. All those years of working out and playing basketball paid off wonderfully. You couldn’t help but drool at his physique. A tanned toned chest, swole arms, and deliciously thick thighs. He was every woman's dream but he was yours tonight.

“Look at you” he spoke softly, settling himself between your open legs “so so beautiful.” He pushed his cock slowly between your folds, coating his dick in your essence. “Look how far I’d be if I put my dick in all the way baby I’d be in your stomach” he chuckled, slapping his cock against your soft tummy, “you gonna let me put it all in you? Want my dick in your tummy?” he grinned at your quiet pleas finally giving into you. Eren gripped your plush thighs pushing them back until they were practically touching your ears before slowly pushing his cock in the both of you moaning in unison. “Eren I-” “I know baby I know so fucking tight” he growled halting his movement to let you adjust.

He was about halfway in and he wanted nothing more than to fill you up, to see the bulge in your tummy every time he fucked into you all he needed was the green light to do so. “You good? Gonna let me put the rest in?” he whispered, bringing his thumb to your swollen clit rubbing slow circles. “Y-yes please Eren” you whined squeezing around him. “F-fuck okay baby tell me if it hurts too much” he groaned pushing the rest of him cock in your already stuffed pussy. Eren rested his forehead against yours, his eyes fluttering shut. You were gripping him like a vice already making him want to cum but he held back using every ounce of strength he had.

After taking a moment to gather himself Eren began fucking into you at a brutal pace the loud claps of his pelvis against your ass echoing throughout the room. “Ohhh shit” you cried, digging your acrylics into Eren’s flexing biceps. Eren brought one leg onto the bed and you knew he was about to put in some serious work. His pace went from fast and shallow to slow and deep, his swollen tip bumping against your cervix every time he fucked into you. “That feel good?” he grunted removing one hand from your thigh instead finding its place on your throat. “Yes Eren s’good” you sighed dreamily bringing both your hands to his face caressing the smooth skin of his cheeks. The moment was so raw, so intimate it honestly made you want to cry. “Feel so good-fuck you’re so beautiful should’ve been with me not him” he growled tightening his grip on your neck. “M’all yours Eren you can have me please please take me” he whined the lack of oxygen making your head fuzzy.

“P-put your arms around my n-neck” he panted planning to show you right now why he absolutely loves shorter women. You complied wrapping your arms around his thick neck, but what you weren’t expecting was for him to lift you up keeping you securely in his strong arms. His dick still remained inside you, the new angle sending shivers down your spine. “Don’t worry baby I’m not gonna drop you just pay attention to me and me only” he pressed a sweet kiss to your swollen lips before bringing both hands to your ass and proceeding to fuck you.

“Yes yes fuck Eren right there” you squealed burying your face into his cologne scented neck. You kissed and sucked at his neck and normally he wouldn’t be into that with his usual hookups but you were different. He wanted you to mark him up in fact he’d show the scratches and bruises proudly around campus letting everyone know he had the honor of fucking you.

Eren roughly pressed your body against the door fucking into you like his life depended on it. Before you knew it you were cumming covering Eren’s lower abdomen and thighs. Your thighs were shaking violently, tears of pleasure beginning to fall from your eyes. “Holy shit did you just squirt?” Eren laughed gripping bringing one hand up to grip your cheeks smushing them together. “Mhmm” you whimpered trying to recover as best as you could from your earth shattering orgasm, “never done that before” you mumbled feeling your cheeks begin to burn. “Want you to do that again… this time in my mouth.”

“Wha-?” before you could muster out anything else Eren was on his knees for you once more, your thick thighs caging his head. He took it upon himself to shove three fingers in your sopping pussy, his lips wrapping around your puffy clit. His fingers were consistently brushing against that spot that drove you crazy and he knew in no time you’d be cumming once again. The pleasure was so overwhelming you hadn’t even realized you were pushing Eren’s head impossibly close against your pussy giving him little to no room to breathe, but he didn’t care too drunk on the smell and taste of you to come up for air. In no time you were cumming once again soaking the entire bottom half of Eren’s face and his chest. “So fucking sweet I should really punsih you for keeping this pussy away from me too long but we’ll save that for next time yeah?” he grinned up at you, his heart rate quickening at your impending answer.

“Yeah…next time” you smiled back down at him, the thought of there being a next time making your heart flutter. Eren picked you up once more, bringing you back over to the bed and he could tell you were getting tired but he couldn’t stop, not until he's filled you up with his cum. “C’mon princess, arch your back for me” he huffed, wiping the excess cum off his face with the back of his hand. You being the good girl for him that you were arched your back giving him a mouth watering view of your swollen pussy. Eren wasted no time slipping himself back inside of your comforting heat feeling his orgasm quickly approach.

He grabbed both your arms pulling you against his chest putting you in a chokehold with his strong bicep (OMFGGGG IMAGINE okay anyways). “I’m so fucking close Y/N can I cum in you? Please lemme cum in you” he moaned pathetically, feeling his balls tighten. “Y-yes Eren please cum in me” you cried your eyes crossing from the lack of oxygen and immense pleasure you were receiving. “Ah fuck!” Eren growled pushing your face in the mattress pounding into you like a madman. With one final thrust he was filling your pussy with his cum so much it began to dribble out of your cunt trailing down your thighs. Eren’s legs gave out making him collapse on top of you, his eyes fluttering shut.

“Um Eren?” your voice was muffled due to your face being smushed into the bed, “you’re kinda crushing me” you giggled. “Oh shit my bad” he grunted rolling onto his back, he pulled you into his side stroking your back softly. The perfect moment was ruined though when the two of you heard the doorknob rattle and then hard knocks at the door, “who the fuck is in my room?!” the voice cried and your heart froze when you recognized it. Jean fucking Kirstien. “We’ll be out in a minute, asshole!” Eren snapped slightly annoyed at the fact that Jean has ruined this soft moment with you.

Eren stood up on shaky legs beginning to put his clothes back on, “get dressed m’gonna take you to my dorm so I can give you some proper aftercare” he smiled tossing you your dress. He sensed the skepticism on your face and looked back at the door trying not to show his annoyance, afraid you would think it was towards you. “I won’t let him say shit to you okay? You don’t need to worry about him anymore plus…I’ll give you a piggyback ride” he chuckled, giving you a cheeky smile that you returned. “Okay okay fine” you giggled putting your dress back on but something was missing. “What about my-” “Oh these?” he smirked holding up your damp panties between his fingers, “I think I’ll hold onto them for a bit.”

Once you looked semi presentable Eren finally unlocked the door revealing a gaping Jean too stuck to say anything. “Great party Jean and we’d love to stay but Y/N needs a little bit of tending to if you couldn’t hear” he smirked wrapping his arm possessively around your shoulders. After leaving the party Eren kept his promise and carried you all the way to his dorm making sure to kiss every mark he left on you along with multiple praises about how gorgeous you were and how lucky he was you gave him a chance. It turns out that Eren was right after all, Jean would never know what to do with all you had to offer…not like Eren does.

<3

[theoreticslut]

「 like she hung the stars 」

steve harrington x fem reader

summary: although you’ve been with steve for nearly a year, you can’t help but wonder if he’s using you as a stand-in for nancy. 

requested: yes

word count: 3.1k

warnings: pretty angsty but it has a cute, fluffy-ish ending; mentions of alcohol consumption & being drunk, insecure relationship, pet names (baby, babe & sweetheart), mention of future relationship, mention of marriage & children

a/n: this request was so cute!! i had to write it asap, & i’m lowkey in love with it if i do say so. it’s really kind of angsty the entire way through, but there’s a cute ending. i really have a hard time leaving a fic ansgty. it’s a weakness of mine. anyways, i hope you all like this! Xx

It’s been well over an hour since you and Steve arrived at this house party, which has given you plenty enough time to drink your fair share of the spiked punch. It was potent, but it was drinkable, and it got you drunk which is all you wanted. 

You hadn’t ever told Steve that you felt insecure in your relationship, mainly because the reasoning behind it felt silly. He had asked you out a few months after he and Nancy broke up last year, which shouldn’t be of any concern, but you had seen them while they were together. It was clear that Steve loved her - deeper than you’d ever thought possible. 

Having noticed this, you couldn’t stop the thought of him still loving her - even though he was currently with you - from settling in the recesses of your mind. You couldn’t stop the thought from tormenting you late at night, even when he slept beside you.

Within the last few months the thought had only become more incessant, tormenting you not just late at night anymore, but throughout the day as you went about your classes and your clubs, even when you sat around talking with him and his friends. It was exhausting, but you couldn’t easily ignore it anymore. Not when you’ve been finding Steve staring at her more and more whenever she was around. 

Hence why you’re getting drunk off of shitty punch at some house party that you’re not even sure who’s throwing. You were simply tagging along with Steve, and even he had wandered off from you.

At first it was fine, you knew he was popular around school and it had been a few months since he graduated. You figured he was just catching up with old friends and classmates. 

Within the last half hour though, you spotted him chatting with Nancy and her boyfriend, Jonathan. You didn’t want to think anything of it, knowing they were trying to be friends, but as you watch him laughing and smiling at Nancy, you can’t help the ache that settles in your heart.

Not thinking much of it, you find yourself taking a deep breath before cautiously making your way over to the small group. You didn’t want to come off as insecure or jealous, but you couldn’t sit back and watch the scene any longer. Figuring that you’d test the waters by nonchalantly approaching them, you do just that.

Although worried that Steve might get upset with you joining them, you’re relieved when he smiles as you come up next to him. Wrapping an arm around your waist, you let your head rest on his chest as he continues talking.

“No, th-that’s really cool, man. I hope you like it.” Steve comments, replying to something that had been said before you came over.

“Yeah, I-I do. It’s nice. Pays decent enough, you know?” Jonathan mumbles, chuckling awkwardly as Steve nods.

Without even being a part of the conversation you can tell it’s been awkward like this for some time.

“Nance is actually, uh, looking to apply there this summer too.” 

“Really? That’s awesome. I mean, y-you do like journalism. I’m sure it’ll be, you know, a great fit.” Steve mentions, Nancy nodding politely with a terse smile on her lips. 

“‘M gonna get another drink, Steve.” You murmur, wanting to leave the awkward aura of their conversation. That and you really don’t care to hear how much Steve knows about Nancy.

“You’re not done with this one though?” He questions, having noticed your cup was still about half full when you first came over here.

Tilting it to make sure he hadn’t seen it incorrectly, he frowns when he realizes it’s actually more than half full. Only then does he notice just how much you’re leaning against him for support while your eyes are half closed.

“Baby, are you drunk?” 

“No, just tired.” You huff, your speech sluggish as you answer him. 

As you do so, though, you attempt to take a step back to look at him, but you stumble and spill your drink all over yourself.

“Shit. Let’s get you cleaned up, baby. Yeah?” He questions, taking the cup from your hand as he holds you up.

“Sorry guys.” You hear him apologize to Nancy and Jonathan and you can’t help but feel a little hurt.

You know it’s irrational, he’s essentially just excusing the two of you from the conversation, but in your intoxicated state you feel like he’s ashamed of you - like you’re an embarrassment he didn’t want them to see.

As the thought settles in your head, you pay no attention as Steve leads you through the crowded house to find the bathroom upstairs. You don’t even realize you’re in the bathroom until he closes the door behind the two of you, starting to  look for a cloth he can wet and dab your shirt with.��

“I don’t know how you’ve been drinking that punch all night, sweetheart. Shit’s strong.” He chuckles as he crinkles his nose at the smell of the cup as he tosses it out.

“Not that bad.” You mumble, staring at your hands as you sit on the sink counter while he continues searching for a cloth.

“Aha, found it.” Steve smiles, not even acknowledging that you said anything. Truthfully you’re not even sure he heard you, but it doesn’t matter.

You watch as Steve wets the cloth, squeezing the excess water out of it before he brings his attention to you and the stain on your shirt.

“You liked this shirt, too, babe. You gotta be careful.” He comments, voice gentle as he begins to dab at the stain, holding the material away from your body as he carefully presses the wet cloth to it.

You figure he’s just talking to fill the silence so you let him, not worrying about responding.

“‘M not sure how well this is going to come out, but we’re going to try, okay?”

~.~

Steve frowns lightly when he doesn’t hear anything from you. He wasn’t expecting a long answer of any sorts, in fact he wasn’t even expecting a single word, but he did expect a little hum or something from you. 

Bringing his attention to your face, he realizes you’re staring at your shirt as he works, but that your mind is somewhere else entirely.

“What’re you thinking about, sweetheart?” He murmurs, continuing to work on the material in his hands, using a hand to lift your chin to look at him briefly.

“What’s on that pretty little mind of yours, huh?” 

He can’t stop the small smile that comes to his lips as he glances up at you, taking a moment to realize just how pretty you are sitting here.

“Nothin’.” 

“Nothing? You sure, baby?” He frowns, having noticed how your shoulders dropped when you answered him, not to mention the fact that you started wringing your hands together - a nervous habit of yours.

He doesn’t like the idea of you keeping something from him, especially if it’s something that upsets you. 

“Do you love me?” You suddenly question, voice seeming scared.

“Do I lov-? Of course I love you, y/n.” He splutters, not sure where this would have come from.

“Why would you think I don’t, sweetheart?” 

“You’ve just, you’ve been watching Nancy a lot when she’s around.” You mumble, still wringing your hands together as Steve settles his hands either side of you on the counter, a soft sigh leaving his lips as he frowns. 

He can’t help the ache that begins in his chest as he listens to you already sounding defeated. Scanning over your face, he can’t help but sigh deeper when he realizes you won’t look at him.

“Will you look at me, y/n?”

~.~

You can feel him watching you still as you softly shake your head, being too anxious to do so if he’s going to study you, which you know he will. He may have portrayed himself as an asshole most of his life, but deep down he’s always been a softie, taking great care to notice things about those he cares for. 

He doesn’t like hurting people, which is why he’s so meticulous when it comes to reading others emotions. He doesn’t want to miss something.

“I’ve seen the way you look at her, like she’s the moon on an otherwise dark night. You look at her like she hung the stars in the sky…” you start, needing to get all of this off your chest.

You can’t hold onto the ache any longer without some sort of an answer. You can handle the hurt that would come if he does still love her, but you can’t bear this ache of not knowing if he actually loves you like he says he does.

“It’s…it’s the same way you looked at her when you were dating. When you loved her.” You murmur, feeling your throat tighten up with the threat of tears.

Taking a moment to breathe through the onslaught of emotion, you will the ache of threatened tears to fade away so you can finish your thoughts. You need to tell him how you’ve been feeling, not smother them into coercion. 

“I can’t shake the feeling that you maybe still love her. That I’m just…a placeholder until you can have her again.”

A silence falls in the small bathroom as you get the words out, only glancing up to him to see if he’s still listening. At the extended lull of conversation, you feel your stomach start to twist with dread. 

You had a feeling that you were simply a distraction for him, but you didn’t want to admit it, afraid that if you did it’d make it a reality.

“I’m not going to lie…” he starts, clearing his throat.

“I do still love her, and I think a part of me always will. She woke me up from the dreamworld I lived in for so many years.”

You nod, a fat, unannounced tear falling from your eye straight to your anxiously-tangled hands.

“But I’m with you, sweetheart, and I plan to stay with you until you get sick of me.” He smiles, grabbing one of your hands in his and squeezing to let you know he’s there with you. 

A moment passes without a word before he lifts your chin up with a finger of his free hand so he can meet your eyes.

Finding them filled with fat, unshed tears, he frowns with an aching heart. Wiping the tears away as they begin to fall over your lash line, he brings his lips to your forehead with a soft kiss.

“I am so sorry to have made you feel this way, sweetheart. I never meant to make you feel so insecure in our relationship. I love you, and I don’t ever want you to feel like I don’t.”

“Nancy and I are in the past and I know it. I accept it. I wasn’t what she wanted, and that’s okay. She left me so I could find you, and everyday I’m happier because of it. You make me happy, baby, and I don’t want you to forget that.”

“I-if that’s true, then why have you been watching her so much? Why are you so awkward around her?” You question, sniffling as occasional tears still roll down your cheeks.

“I watch her because I do still love her and wonder what would have happened if things worked out, but I know she’s happy with Jonathan so I let it be. Her and I are done, y/n, I promise you.” 

“If she were to say she still loved you too, would you go back to her?”

“I don’t know.” Steve sighs as you nod, heart feeling as if it’s cracking a little more as you drop your head back down to look at your lap.

“I’m not sure she ever really loved me if I’m honest. I was a shit boyfriend to her, baby, and she realized that. She’s the one who ended the relationship in search of something better, and I don’t blame her one bit. I needed a wake up call and she gave me that.”

“She gave me the push I needed to change myself and be a better person so I can be better to you. I want to be better for you, and I don’t think I could leave you just because of her saying she still loves me. You mean the world to me, sweetheart.”

~.~

Steve simply watches as you nod at his words and he can tell you don’t believe him. He doesn’t blame you, knowing how ruthless invasive, insecure thoughts can be. He especially knows how hard it is to let go of them when you’ve got actions to back them up.

It pains him to think he was feeding into your insecurities of the relationship by watching Nancy. He never meant anything by it. He was simply thinking of the “what if’s,” but he never once thought about leaving you for those daydreams. 

He knows that they’re irrational anyway. Him and Nancy don’t work, and even after he’s bettered himself, he’s positive that it still wouldn’t work between them. 

You and him on the other hand? He can see you two working out. He can see himself marrying you and settling down here in Hawkins - or wherever you want to go. He can see the two of you having children together, both of you running around outside with them with wide smiles on your faces. 

He can see himself making you coffee before you’re even awake only so he can wake you up with it and a kiss day after day for the rest of his life, and he can see himself loving you even when the two of you are old and gray. He can see himself with you, and he only hopes you can see it too.

Watching you sit here, though, heart breaking in front of him on the counter in the bathroom of some long-forgotten house party, he can’t help but feel like he’s screwed everything up. He loves you and yet you so easily believe that he loves someone else.

“Y/n, I love you. I love you more than I ever thought possible, and it honestly scares me.”

He can see you let out a shaky breath even though you’re refusing to look at him. He’s sure his words are simply going in one ear and out the other because you’re already convinced that he doesn’t love you even though he’s been trying to prove otherwise.

“I can see us getting married sometime down the road, you know?” He mentions, voice soft as he lets himself be vulnerable with you. 

Sure he’s been honest with you about everything so far, but he hasn’t been vulnerable. He’s been trying to reassure you with empty words instead of letting you see how he actually feels. 

“I think about our wedding quite often actually,” he chuckles, embarrassed to admit that fact.

“I think of how it’ll be filled with everyone who loves us and wants us to be happy. I think about that first dance we’ll have together, and how I’ll say something cheesy just to get you to smile and laugh as we pretend there’s no one else in the room.” 

“I think about all the planning we’d have to do for it, and how I want to be there for every part of it. I don’t want you to do all the planning and stressing when it’s just as much my day as it is yours. I mean, it’ll be the day I marry the love of my life. How could I leave all the planning for such an important day to one person when I’m the only one who can answer for what I want?”

“I mean, what if you choose seat covers with a bow and I want simple seats with personalized place cards?” He asks, smiling when he hears you chuckle at the absurdity. 

“I can see us sharing that first kiss as husband and wife, and it makes me all jittery inside at the sheer happiness it brings me.”

~.~

“I can see this, y/n. I can see us, and I never once saw it with Nancy.” 

“With Nance, it was more of a ‘I see us sitting at lunch together’ thing than it was a ‘I see us, still married at the age of 85’ thing.” 

You can’t help the little snort that leaves your lips as you think of yourself and Steve at 85 years old. It surprises you, but you find it easy to see the picture yourself. You’ve never thought much about it, too afraid that it’d be getting your hopes up, but you can see yourself marrying Steve and it makes your stomach tingle and your chest feel light.

“All the big stuff, though? I see you at my side for all of it, y/n.” Steve finishes and you take the risk to look up at him.

Meeting his eyes you catch a glimpse of uncertainty within him. He can see this, but he worries that you can’t, and for some reason that’s enough for you to believe him.

Laughing at how pitiful you must look, you wipe at your cheeks before you grab one of his hands, playing with his fingers as he watches you. You love him, and for the first time in a long time you believe that he loves you too.

“Just for the record,” you start, blushing a bit as you think about the words about to leave your mouth and the sheer absurdity of it all.

“I think specialized place cards are a must, and that seat covers with bows are terribly tacky.” 

Looking up at him as you pause your anxious playing with his fingers, you watch as a smile breaks out on his face, wider than you’ve ever seen from him as he laughs in disbelief.

“I love you, y/n. I love you so fucking much.” He smiles, not hesitating to bring his hands up to your jaw as he kisses you fiercely and yet still so soft.

You can feel all the heartache he was feeling at your admission through the kiss, just like you can feel all the happiness inflating him now. He wants you, and you’ve never felt more sure of that fact. 

As he keeps his lips on yours, although the kiss grows softer and more smiley, you feel your heart slowly being glued back together, and you can’t help but smile at the realization that all you needed was a little bravery and honesty in order to feel so secure with him. It’s a new feeling, but one that’s pleasantly welcomed as you let yourself completely melt into the kiss - and into Steve - for the first time since he asked you out.

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[maximoff-pan]

steve and reader drabble about a secret relationship mayhaps? 😫

you know I can’t resist writing for this hunk of a man ;)

pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader

word count: 2.4k

warning(s): some swears, being caught red handed 🤭

quick a/n: hi lovelies! sorry for being m.i.a recently. I’ve gone back to school and it’s been too busy for me to write anything. I apologize for this being rushed/incoherent, please forgive me….

part two

Fucking girls night…

Whatever possessed you to think this was a good idea, you’re not entirely sure. Honestly, you can’t even remember who convinced you to come; they’d all been begging you for weeks to finally show up to one of these things. And now that you’re here, you’re quickly realizing why you’d been so hesitant before.

You don’t think you’ve ever felt this flustered or uncomfortable in your life, and that’s definitely saying something. Really saying something…

It’s not the fact that everyone here has a significant other that bothers you. It’s the fact that everyone here has a significant other, and they think you don’t. Because as far as they’re concerned, you’re as single as single can be.

Which would be fine if it was the truth. But it’s not. And the guilt is starting to eat at you. How many more times do they have to try and set you up before you break?

Quite frankly, at this rate, it feels like you’re almost there.

“What about Peter Wilson?”

Robin recoils at Nancy’s suggestion, picking her nails in disgust. “Absolutely not.”

You remain quiet. They’re trying to find you a boyfriend, again.

“What’s so bad about him?” Max inquires.

El adds, “He’s kind of cute.”

“Sure,” Robin scoffs, “If you’re into delusional sociopaths.”

Tilting her head, brow quirked, Nancy asks, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Robin’s pitch drops slightly. “Let’s just say, that incident where Stacy Mathers almost drowned last summer, wasn’t so much of an accident.”

Max’s eyes widen. “You mean he tried to–” she trails, too disturbed to even finish the sentence.

Robin nods. “That one’s as sadistic as they come.”

“Okay.” Nancy agrees, moving the conversation along. “So that’s a no on Peter.”

“Ooh.” El claps, eyes locking with Max. “What about Adam?”

“Adam Richards?”

Max and El nod together.

Your head has never whipped around faster. “You can’t be serious!”

Your voice catches Robin’s attention. “First of all,” she smirks, “welcome to the conversation! And second of all, what could possibly be wrong with him?” She knows exactly what’s wrong with him, she just wants to see you squirm.

“Rob, he’s fucking sixteen.”

“And?” Max joins in.

“I’m almost twenty.” You state. That should be reason enough, but as you glance between them, they don’t look convinced. The concern on your face is evident as you say, “I am not about to be some cradle robber!”

“But he’s like,” Max pauses adding on a valley girl accent, “the hottest Junior at Hawkin’s High.”

Your face scrunches in disgust, mimicking the accent back. “Fucking, ew.”

Nancy and El giggle at the interaction.

“Okay, so you’re not into younger guys then.” Robin teases, a sparkle of mischief in her stare. “Noted.”

These girls are going to drive you into madness…

“You know what else I’m not into?” The cadence of your voice carries with a hint of amusement. “My friends desperately trying to set me up because they think I’m pathetic and lonely.”

“But you are lonely.” Is El’s retort. Three pairs of eyes widen at the remark, but not yours. El’s bluntness has never surprised you. It’s actually pretty comforting, because you know she’d never lie to you.

Nancy hisses with a whine. “El.”

You’ve been around the Wheeler’s long enough to know that Nancy was raised to be a proper young lady, one who would never dare offend anyone. That alone causes your lip to quirk in bemusement.

You chuckle, feelings quite intact. “Oh good.” Your smile is cheeky. “At least you don’t think I’m pathetic.”

“She never said she didn’t.” Max points out with a grin.

“Hilarious Maxine.” You mock a sarcastic and melodic laugh.

“I don’t think you’re pathetic.” El cuts in before Max can say anything else. “I just think you need a boyfriend.”

You have half a mind to say ‘I’ve already got one,’ but you bite your tongue.

Just like you have for the last six months.

That’s half a year of trying so hard to keep your relationship status on the down low. Because things with Steve are new, and after many years of denying any feelings towards each other, you finally decided to go for it. But, on the off chance you both found that you were better off as friends, you came to the mutual decision that waiting to tell the kids (and everyone else) was the best idea. As much as you think they’d be happy to see you two together (and boy have they pushed for it), it’s not something you’d want to get their hopes up for.

You’re serious about Steve, more serious than you’ve ever been about anyone before. As much confidence as you hold in your love for him, you know he’s serious about you too. And maybe now that you’re certain (at least on your end) that you’re both sure, you can start to tell everyone about your relationship. For tonight though, you’re going to have to continue playing the role of the lonely single.

How tragic…your mind wanders.

“Oh my god!” Nancy’s interjection catches you off guard. She’s masking her smirk well, but you can still see it. “How could I not have thought of this?”

Her surprise feels more like it’s been planned, like she’s been thinking of a way to bring whatever she’s been thinking about into the conversation without rousing too much suspicion.

“Thought of what?” Robin asks, feeding into it.

Your eyes narrow.

Nancy leans over to whisper something into her ear. The chain continues with Robin leaning in to tell Max, and Max whispering it to El, leaving you thoroughly left out.

What is she planning?

“Uh, a little inclusion might be nice.” You tutt.

Four pairs of eyes bore into you, excited smiles resting on each of their faces.

Here it comes, you think.

“All this talk of boys…” Nancy starts. “What about Steve?” She asks.

And there it is. “Guys.” You groan. “Not this again.”

“C’mon (Y/n), please?” Max’s whine is on the verge of a full on beg. “I know you’ve thought about it. We all see the way you look at each other.”

“Like I do.” El’s matter-of-factness is not so comforting in this moment. “With Mike. And Max, with Lucas.”

“Oh!” Max exclaims. “Remember when Nancy and Jonathan first got together? They were really good friends, like you and Steve.”

You take a quick glance over to Nancy who’s now gone quiet, a pink blush covering the softness of her cheeks.

“Guys. Steve and I are just that,” you eye each of them with a deep intensity, “friends.”

Nancy remembers saying the exact same thing to Murray Bauman after he’d accused her and Jonathan of suppressing their feelings.

She hadn’t quite known then how strong she felt about him, as she does now. But as she glances in your direction, she reads an expression on your face that she wasn’t expecting: guilt.

You don’t exactly look like someone who’s freaking themselves out over their newly discovered — and to everyone else, totally obvious — feelings for their best friend like she had. Instead, you look like you’ve accepted them, and more so, if Nancy is as good at reading you as she thinks she is, you look like you’re hiding something.

“You’d be perfect together.” Is one of Max’s last attempts of the night at convincing you. She only wants to see you happy. Maybe if she just pushed a little more.

Your heart wrenches at her words.

You hate lying to them, you really do. You’re almost not sure why you’re doing it anymore, but you can’t seem to stop yourself.

God, you wish a black hole would suck you into the abyss. “Max, you know that’s not how it works. You can’t decide you’re going to be with someone just because you want to be. There’s a whole other person to consider.”

“Semantics.” She puffs a breath of air, waving you off. “And not if that other person is already head over heels in love with you.”

“Max.” You warn with the tilt of your head and an extremely deep breath.

Robin jumps in, lips pulled into a cheeky grin. “I’m not hearing a no.”

If that’s what it’ll take, you think, “Then no.” You finally say.

Robin catches your gaze, her eyes softening. All hints of teasing seem to be gone. There’s no way this can mean anything good.

“I know I don’t do this often,” she starts, “but I’m going to say something in all seriousness here.”

“Please don’t.”

Robin’s unimpressed stare tells you that she’s not only going to ignore your request, but she also really means what she’s about to say. Her voice is steady and calm as she speaks, “Steve likes you.” She says like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, and you suppose it is. At least now.

“He’s told me. I mean, he really, really likes you… like marry you this instant, thinks about having six kids with you, likes you…” She drags the words slowly trying to emphasize her point.

You know this. But you have to play that you don’t. “Jeez, I don’t know about the six kids and the marriage part, I think you might be getting way ahead of yourself there Rob,” your voice drifts slightly. “But I’d hope that at the very least Steve likes me. It’s not like he’s one of my best friends or anything.”

Max lets out a low groan. Robin has basically confirmed that Steve (despite everyone else already knowing this) is in love with you, and you’re still refusing to acknowledge it.

It’s beyond frustrating. “You’re so hopeless.” She says.

“Am I?” You jest. As guilty as you feel, this is sort of fun for you.

“Terribly.” Is her reply.

You grin, happy to change the subject. “Can’t make things easy for you now can I?”

“We’d never expect you to.” Stormy blue orbs catch yours, a flicker of recognition flashing back to you.

There's a hint in Nancy’s voice and demeanour that tells you she knows more than she’s letting on. The look she gives you says it all: your secret’s safe with me.

You shouldn’t be surprised that she picked up on it. She’s probably known for months. Because not only does she know you and Steve better than almost anyone else, she knows exactly what Steve looks like when he’s in love.

With a soft smile falling onto your lips, you breathe a sigh of relief in the moment of brief silence that rests between you. Someone knows, and they approve. Your eyes glimmer gratefully. Thank you. Your signal is nonverbal, but she understands nonetheless.

You’re welcome.

• ж • ж • ж •

Steve wonders how you’re doing right about now. Because at the moment, he wants nothing more than to be with you, hanging out and not having to worry about keeping this a secret.

For the past hour, Dustin, Lucas, and Mike have been driving him up a wall. Susie this. El that. Max, blah blah blah.

Mike had started it all with a quick, ‘Hey Steve, why don’t you have a girlfriend?’

Then Lucas had joined in. ‘Yeah, what happened to you man? I thought you were supposed to be some kind of God or something?’

“He used to be.” Dustin had assured them. “Still is. The God’s somewhere in there.” Dustin poked at Steve’s chest. He’d seen Steve in action before, he knows the charm is real.

The pale raven haired teen beside Dustin then snorted. “Bagging my sister doesn’t count.”

Steve almost punted Mike over that one. Smug little bastard…

And that’s not even the worst of it. Steve can take the constant teasing of his romantic failures; he’s been doing that for years now, taking blow after blow to his ego. It’s Eddie’s creepy staring that’s sending him over the fucking edge. Every time he looks over, there’s Eddie, already looking at him.

Steve shudders at the thought. He can feel Munson’s pair of deep brown eyes burning holes through his back, the hairs on his neck raised in discomfort. It’s like with every breath Steve takes, Eddie is analyzing it. He’s this close to smacking Eddie upside the head and telling him to cut this shit out.

It’s only when they get a moment alone does he discover the reason for the Hellfire club leader’s strange behaviour. They stand awkwardly in Mrs. Henderson’s kitchen, fumbling for snacks for the boys when Eddie finally breaks the silence.

“So,” his smirk is apparent. Steve didn’t know someone could smile that wide. “I was thinking.”

“Ah.” Steve hums trying to settle the nervous pit in his stomach. “Is that what that was?”

Eddie chuckles. “You know what Steve-O? Just for the ‘tude, maybe I shouldn’t tell you what I was thinking…” he trails.

That’s a challenge if he’s ever heard one, and he’s not about to bite. Eddie is anything but patient.

“Fine by me.” Steve claps a hand on Eddie’s shoulder as he passes him to grab a bowl from one of Dustin’s cupboards.

Eddie’s brow raises in surprise at his response, running a hand through his curly mop of hair.“Woah, c’mon.” He moves swiftly following him. “I was only kidding! Of course I’m going to tell you.”

Steve grabs the bag of popcorn from the cupboard, and pops it into the microwave. “Alright.”

“Okay.”

A couple of moments pass before:

“So?...” Steve’s fingers drum across the countertop in anxiety.

Eddie’s eyes widen. “Oh right.” He says, watching the time tick down on the clock. “It’s more of a question really.”

Steve moves to grab the bag out of the microwave as the timer beeps. “Shoot.” He replies, gently dumping the popcorn into the big plastic bowl. He’s kind of proud of himself for keeping this calm when he feels so on edge.

“Stop me if I cross the line or anything,” That’s never a good start to a sentence…

Eddie’s voice lowers in volume, but his tone grows in confidence. There’s something else to it, amusement…satisfaction maybe, Steve can’t quite place it. But he doesn’t like it.

Amber eyes meet a honey brown. Steve’s not sure how many seconds pass before he hears Eddie say:

“How long have you and (Y/n) been fucking?”

Well, fuck.

[bethdutten]

think of me

bucky x temporarily enhanced!reader 

summary: a mission gone wrong transfers wanda’s powers to you. now that you can read minds, you find out all sorts of things bucky has been keeping to himself.

words: 2k

a/n: another random fic no one asked for!

It happened so quickly, you didn’t have a chance to stop it.

The villain-of-the-week appeared beside you, grabbing your arm. You flinched, a hand immediately flying out to shove Wanda back and safely out of the way before you kicked this guy’s ass, but—

The second you hand touched her, you felt a wave of power ripple between you, and you hit the ground as everything went black.

—-

“How’s she doin’?”

“Same as yesterday.”

“Yeah? Shit. It’s been, what, a week? What if she—“

“Don’t say it.”

“… Jesus, I didn’t mean—“

“Man, if you’re going to be an ass, just get out of here.”

“Sorry. I didn’t mean— she’s gonna be fine.”

“Yeah.”

There was silence for a really long time, your brain registering the voices as Bucky and Sam before it drifted off into sleep again. When you woke again, it was to Bucky’s voice, panicked and scared.

“What if she doesn’t wake up? Fuck, why wasn’t I there? I’m so useless, if I can’t protect her why am I even on the team? Why didn’t I tell her? I should have told her—“

“Buck?” you mumbled, eyes fluttering open as you searched him out. You expected to see him pacing the room, that angry look on his face he always got when he was putting himself down, anxiously running his hands through his hair maybe—

Instead, your eyes met soft slate-blue ones sitting by the side of your bed, a book in his left hand and his right one holding yours. His face was filled with relief for a moment, settling into one of ease.

“Thank fuck. You’re okay.”

You frowned, the light pouring in from the window hurting your head, giving you a headache. “Are you?”

Bucky tilted his head, watching you strangely. “Why are you asking me that? You’re the one that’s been out cold for week.”

“She’s got a concussion, great. I should call the doctor.”

You froze. Bucky’s voice, only Bucky wasn’t speaking. But—

“You probably have a concussion,” he sighed, squeezing your hand gently before he let it go and stood up, “I’ll get a doctor.”

As he left the room, you blinked and tried to figure out what was going on. Did you just… read Bucky’s mind?

When he came back with a doctor in tow, you knew for sure something was seriously wrong. There was a voice in the room you didn’t recognize until after the doctor introduced himself, then it was vitals and confusing stats being repeated but he wasn’t speaking them. Bucky’s voice was all around the room, although he was silent.

Is she okay? Why isn’t he saying anything? Of course she’s not okay, but what’s wrong with her? I’m going to strangle this guy if he doesn’t do something to help my girl—

Suddenly your heart monitor was beeping a lot faster, the doctor furrowing his brow and focusing on your pulse now. His girl? Since when did Bucky think of you like that?

“Are you feeling dizzy?” The doctor asked, but you turned to Bucky instead.

“Um, where’s Wanda? Is she okay?” you squeaked, allowing yourself to be prodded as the doctor’s thoughts lingered on a low-grade concussion.

“She’s here with Sam. No injuries, but her powers are gone,” Bucky explained, his thoughts still on various ways to injure the doctor if he didn’t give him an update on how you were. You just nodded, partially zoning out as the doctor finally told you it was definitely a concussion, and the broken ankle you got when you fell was already healing when you were out.

Did you somehow get Wanda’s powers? You didn’t have time to think too long on it before the woman herself was bursting in, quickly pushing out Bucky and the doctor, ignoring the scowl and practically a snarl of warning from the former.

“You’re wake, dulceață.” And you can hear me, right?

You gasped, nodding. “Wanda, what’s going on? Why can I hear what you’re thinking, and Bucky’s—“

Wanda gave a knowing smile, but shook her head. “The latest bad guy. He was able to transfer my powers to you, when we all had a point of contact. When you pushed me out of the way.”

“Oh, shit. I’m so sorry—“

“Stop, you were protecting me, you have no way of knowing,” she soothed, her accent coming out stronger when she was like this.

You bit your lip, sitting up carefully. “Is this… permanent?”

She considered it for a moment, then shrugged. “We should probably go to Bruce, get checked out once they release you. But until then, I don’t think we should worry anyone by saying anything.”

You frown, staring at you. There was silence-- both in the room and in her head. She was blocking you out, because she knew you could read her thoughts. Yeah, you could see how people knowing would get annoying for you. “Okay. But--”

“And a bit of advice?” she began, raising an eyebrow. “Don’t act on anything people think but don’t say. They keep it to themselves for a reason.” She gave you another knowing smile, which only made you think back to Bucky, and how he called you his girl--

“What do you know?”

“Nothing you won’t know soon,” she answered, leaning in and pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “He will tell you when he is ready,” she said quietly, then pulled back with smile. “Shall we get you home?”

You didn’t know what she meant, but it was already killing you.

---

It was torturous, knowing what everyone was thinking and not being able to do anything about it. No wonder Wanda was always on edge-- hearing things like how miserable on Earth Thor was all the time, how horny Natasha really was, all the pointless facts Clint remembered throughout the day that made you forget why you walked into the room-- it was driving you insane.

But the worst was Bucky.

Once you were released from the hospital, he insisted he stayed with you. No matter the weird looks everyone gave him, he was relentless.

It didn’t help that his thoughts were making you want to either punch him or kiss him.

You’d always had a huge crush on Bucky. He’d been stuck with you as a partner when you joined the team, and by some miracle, you worked well together. He was always there when you needed him, and you tried to do the same for him. You never thought that he would be thinking of you that way.

You loved him, let’s be honest. It was impossible not to. Hearing him think about you like this was driving you insane when you couldn’t let him know.

I don’t give a shit what anyone thinks, what if she doesn’t wake up? It’s my fault, the least I can do is stay up and make sure she’s okay.

“Bucky, it wasn’t your fault--”

He stopped from where he was making up a bed on the couch (which he refused to let you take, no, you had to have the bed) and gave you a funny look. “What?”

You felt your cheeks heat up, realizing you were responding to things in his head, not anything he’d said. This was going to be harder than you thought. “I just... don’t want you to feel guilty. About what happened. If that’s why you’re doing all this.”

I’m doing it because I love you.

“I’m doing it because you’re my partner, and I don’t want you to have a stroke and leave me without someone on my six, idiot.”

You almost choked, what he was thinking taking you by surprise, and what he said being so nonchalant. He just rolled his eyes. “I’m kidding.” I love you so much, damn in.

What the fuck was going on?

He ushered you into his bedroom, giving you a death glare and reassuring you he was just outside, then he left you to panic on your own. 

What were you supposed to do with that information? Bucky loves you? Since when? And why wouldn’t he say anything? Now you had to just keep this to yourself knowing he could have you if he would just--

You reached for your phone, quickly texting the one person who would understand this whole fucked up situation.

what the hell? u could have warned me? bucky????

w: took longer than I thought

???

w: what’s he thinking now

how much he loves me? since when?? I'm freaking out

w: ha. ya he does that a lot. since forever?? you love him too, shut up

ok but... why doesn't he say anything? what am I supposed to do with this information?

w: TELL HIM U IDIOT. its not like he won’t love you back ;)

You threw your phone to the foot of the bed, trying to talk yourself down from a panic attack. She was right. You may not be able to confront Bucky and tell him you know he loves you, but you could probably tell him you liked him, too, and there was a guarantee he wouldn’t reject you.

But did you want that? Wouldn’t that change the dynamic of your partnership?

Or was it already too late?

You fell into a fitful sleep, dreams of Bucky while his scent surrounded you tormenting your mind all night.

---

“Hey, time to wake up. Come on, you’ve been asleep too long, don’t make me drag you out of bed.” Is she okay? Shit, I should have woken her up earlier, do I call a doctor? God damn it--

You groaned, letting Bucky know you were awake before you felt a hand on your cheek, turning your face towards him. You were half asleep still, mumbling, “I’m fine, calm down.”

I am calm, I’m fine, sorry I care if you’re alive or not, sweetheart.

You let out a huff of a laugh, burrowing further into the blankets that still smelled of Bucky. “I’m alive, sweetheart.”

You felt the hand on your cheek suddenly pull away, a sharp intake of breath startling you to full awakeness.

“What did you say?”

You blinked, sitting up slightly. “What? Nothing. What did you--”

“Can you read my mind?”

Shit. Half asleep, you couldn’t tell what was Bucky must have been saying versus thinking, and accidentally responded to a thought he was having instead. You blushed, stuttering. “Uh-- n-no, I mean, I might, but I didn’t”

Bucky stared at you, a studying look on his face. It was that last mission, when you and Wanda went down, right? You got her ability to read minds? You’ve been doing it this whole time?

You looked down, ashamed, like you’d just invaded on his privacy and crossed so many lines, because you did. But it wasn’t your fault-- you didn’t ask for it. You couldn’t stop it, at least not until you spoke to Bruce today. You nodded.

“So, there’s no point hiding it anymore, is there?”

You met his eyes, surprised at his soft tone of voice and a hint of a smile on his lips. You tilted your head in question, heart beginning to beat faster at what he was possible implying. “Hiding what?”

Bucky sat on the edge of the bed, suddenly looking very small and nervous. “You’ve heard everything I’ve been thinking, right? It’s not like I’ve been subtle about it.” About how much I love you.

You had to bite down on your lower lip to stop from smiling, shrugging. “No, I guess not.”

He searched your face, taking a breath out before he asked, “And? It doesn’t freak you out?”

You paused, before finally giving in and smiling. This stupid man. “Why would it freak me out, Buck? I love you, too.”

“Wait, what?” He visibly relaxed, shoulders dropping and jaw unclenched as his eyes met yours again, full of hope. “Really? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Why didn’t you?” you teased, shoving at his shoulder. That earned you a grin, and he shrugged.

“Technically, I did.”

You shook your head, sidling a bit closer. “Technically, I’m the only one who has said it.” 

Bucky gave you a fond look, his metal hand coming up to cup your face, making you move in automatically until your lips were a breath away. 

“I love you,” he whispered, just as he thought it, then he kissed you. It was slow as molasses, his tongue licking into your mouth and even tasting like the honey he liked on his toast. 

But he pulled away before you could really savour it, asking, “Wait. Is this permanent? Like, are you always going to be able to read my mind?” Because sometimes I think of you in some very inappropriate ways. Very fun, but very distracting.

You rolled your eyes. “Unfortunately, no, Wanda and I are going to see Bruce this afternoon to see what he can do. It should be reversible.”

“Too bad,” Bucky murmured, leaning in to press a kiss behind your ear. You shivered, hands clinging to his shirt.

“Guess you’ll just have to tell me all those thoughts out loud, then.”

[sanjisblackasswife]

Anon again! May I please get Zoro, Sanji, and Law walking in on their fem!S/O masturbating?(She tries to cover up but sje wasnt fast enough)

A/N: 🫣 Okay I gotchu tho thank u for requesting! Enjoy! Sorry for the late response I’m trynna be as a fast as I can w all requests lmao

The One Piece Men Catch You Playing with Yourself (NSFW)

Black Fem Reader in Mind

CW: Use of Toys (im Like 75% sure vibrators wasn’t a thing back in their time but let’s pretend for the sake of this HC it is…..so yeah), It’s no detailed mention of sex, but it’s heavily implied….I may do a part two

Ft. Zoro, Sanji, & Law

Zoro

Zoro hates sex toys. He thinks they’re numbing and annoying and if anything he should be the only toy you should play with for your needs.

He also hates that you own a vibrator and once you both got in the more sexual side of your relationship he didn’t want you to own it anymore

“I can make you cum better than that stupid ass thing.”

It was almost like he was jealous of it and you just didn’t understand WHY he ain’t like it.

But you seen how annoyed it made him so you did stop. However just because you stopped using your toys didn’t mean Zoro gave you more attention.

There was a few times you were tempted simply because it has been almost a month since you last had sex and you’re getting irritable especially after the last few fights you’ve all encountered the past few weeks

Today Zoro went to go handle some business with Brook, Luffy and Sanji so you and the remnant of the ship kind of went to do your own thing after hanging out for lunch.

You were alone in your shared room with Zoro to clean up a bit when you found the little play thing under your piles of underwear. It was clean and still had plenty of juice since last used months ago.

You felt a hint of nostalgia holding the little cute vibrator remembering how fast it would make you cum and the pressure was always set to high like how you like it

You peaked out your room, it was quieter, nothing but the small chatter of Usopp, Nami, and Robin while Chopper was occupied in his room studying

You were all alone.

“Z-zoro…”

You took a risk doing this in the bright day of a beautiful afternoon. You took off your panties and pants, your legs was spread probably way wider than they should be and you were laying on Zoro’s side of the bed. It was a bit easier at night so you had the vibrator under a few pillow to reduce the volume.

Never failing, the vibrator did what it did best and you were so so close to reaching that orgasm you’ve been in need for for the past few weeks, your eyes was shut, granted you did wish it was Zoro making you feel this good and not some stupid toy, but desperate times calls for desperate measures.

“Oi, Y/N you in—-“

It was almost like time stopped. How did you not hear Luffy hollering out the door? How did you not hear Zoro’s voice call out your name? Why didn’t you lock the door?

So many questions that your pretty little head couldn’t answer in time because you were too busy shutting off the toy.

It was almost as if Zoro was amused. He shut and locked the door behind him, doing what you should have done before pleasuring yourself and he sat on the edge of the bed beside you. He didn’t even look at you he kept his eyes on how tightly you were hugging a pillow with your legs.

“I thought you said you threw that stupid ass thing away?”

His voice was deadpanned. His eyes were dark, he clicked his tongue before getting up hearing no answer from you, but you reached out to grab his arm.

“Wait Zo, don’t leave!”

“Who said I was leaving?”

He pulled off his black tank top with one hand and began to undo his belt. You’d be lying if you said how he was aggressively taking off his clothes in silence didnt make you feel butterflies in your stomach.

“Matter of fact…I want to spend the rest of the day with you, sweetheart.”

“Why?”

Zoro did a dark chuckle dropping his boxers to the floor, he was still soft but big none the less, you swallowed the small lump in your throat, but was interrupted when his fingers wrapped around it instead. He threw the pillow to the ground climbing over your half naked body heavily breathing on your mouth.

“Because I want to remind you my cock is better than that stupid ass toy. Now bend over for me.”

Law

He doesn’t necessarily care.

He is aware that you can be needy but he is usually busy or not in the mood sometimes when you are and you respected that

He has seen you masturbate before but today he felt flustered

Of course he is a blushing mess seeing your legs spread wide on HIS bed wearing HIS shirt

You looked too good whimpering his name with such need

He didn’t want to stop you, as a matter of fact he wanted to enjoy the show but he needed to get something from his room he left prior

So he thought for a moment, “should he knock or should he burst in”?

You have been quite a nuisance lately, but you did use your free time to do this

Hmmmm so many possibilities

But Law is a damn menace just like you so he room’ed himself inside

“L-law!” You cried throwing your blanket over your half naked body, you felt the blood rush to your face seeing you in your most venerable in front of him.

“It’s nothing I haven’t seen before…why are you so shy now?”

“Get outttt! I was almost finished!”

He chuckled to himself and placed his sword down by the door. He thought you looked so cute hiding yourself from him as if he wasn’t going to just snatch those covers off.

And he did.

“So that’s where my black shirt went.”

“Law get outtt stop ittt!” You tried your best to use his thin shirt to cover your lady parts but your thick body never properly fitted his clothes anyways leaving your helpless.

Law climbed beside you on the bed and sighed heavily rubbing your embarrassingly wet inner thigh.

“Shit..you were so close of cumming too, huh. You’re always so damn needy Y/N…fuck.”

You found out early in your relationship Law really likes to watch you play with yourself which is another reason why you didn’t stop once you both got together, but he never done it with you. But seeing the glint in his eyes with lust and the tent in his pants as he was licking his lips you wanted to finally take advantage of the situation.

“Law…” you mewled palming his covered cock, “Why don’t you do it with me then…I mean since you’re already here..”

“I…” Law had difficult time tearing his eyes away from between your legs, your pussy was just so tantalizing he nearly had a shiver up his spine thinking about your moaning out his name in HIS shirt rubbing your clit thinking about him, leaving your event all over his bed. “I can’t Y/N I have to fini—“

You stopped his excuses by sucking his bottom lip and licking his mouth, kissing him to the point his own hat falls off and smiling back at his now flustered face.

“You’re such a fucking tease..” He mumbled grabbing your free breast and rolling his finger and thumb on your nipple making your bite your lip as you now straddle him.

“Just a quickie…pleaseee…” You kissed his ear rubbing your clit on his bulge leaving a small wet spot. “Oops…I made a little mess on your pants…sorry, Captain.”

It didn’t take much after that for the tatted pirate to lower his pants and have you lay back down in front of him and start the show.

Sanji

Horny ass has been waiting his whole life for this to happen lmao

The moment he found out women can masturbate he been wanting to see it so badly, and you have been the one to grace him.

Sure you both have had sex but he wanted to see you at your most vulnerable and helpless.

It was a rainy day on the Sunny and everybody was either inside their rooms or exploring inside the ship for the day. And you spent your day cleaning your room

While finishing up you actually found a very old adult magazine you owned, but thought you lost it and haven’t seen it since

Yeah you were a little pervert like Sanji too that’s why you both are together

You looked through the magazine almost laughing to yourself at all the old material you used to pleasure yourself and seen a short doujin in the back of it and you don’t remember reading that so you did. It was a story on a guy peeping in on the girl he likes taking a shower. The story was pretty straight to the point and it reminded you of Sanji actually.

You thought if he has ever done that to you now that your both are together. I mean he was a pervert. But then you thought again….would it be that bad if he did?

NO! No! It is bad! You shouldn’t watch people as they are bathing! Even if it’s your boyfriend! Everybody deserves privacy.

But thinking about Sanji panting watching you clean your supple body through the bathroom door fucking his fist to you was something you caught yourself biting you lip to the thought.

And that’s how you were here:

Laid on your bed plunging your tiny fingers into your needy cunt thinking about Sanji. Imagining your blonde boyfriend cook was finger fucking you instead of yourself.

“Y/N, my love! Can you come—“

You felt your heart sink to your stomach. Really? They say speak of the devil and he shall appear but who would of thought that applied to thinking too.

You were under a blanket but it hardly covered your entire lower body. Your panties were dangling from your ankles and if you had any color on your face it was no longer there. You and Sanji made brief eye contact before you covered your face under the thin fabric.

Sanji was Frozen, his cigarette fell in awe, he didn’t think he’d be able to see such a sight. Granted he couldn’t see the best part, but he wasn’t stupid he knew what you were doing. He pulled down his tie and locked the door behind him, whatever he came in your room for was now irrelevant seeing this new treasure in front of him.

As much as he wanted to really relish in the moment he felt kind of bad. He seen the horror and embarrassment in your eyes and even though he has seen you naked and he always wanted to see you like this it wasn’t as he expected seeing how you’re now blabbering apologizes and cries under the blanket.

“Y-Y/N…! It’s okay! Don’t be scared I’m not—um—..I should have knocked.”

You didn’t say anything, you felt the weight on the bed shift beside you and his hand rested on your exposed thigh.

“You don’t have to feel embarrassed…I do that a lot too…when you’re busy….”

His voice sounded so soft and sincere you began to lower yourself from the blanket and look at him with glossy eyes. Sanji’s lips curled into a warm smile,

“If it makes you feel any better you looked so sexy like that…”

“Sanji!” You groaned back into the blanket, but he chuckled.

“Can I make it up to you?”

“How.”

“By letting you finish on my fingers….it has been a while since we….ya know…”

You looked up at him only showing your squinting eyes at his offer, he smiled and began to take off his clothing leaving himself only in his boxers. He took your hand crawling back on the bed noting the remnant of your arousal still on your fingers and sucked them in front of you.

“Damn I missed your taste…common let me see…”

He was so gentle with his words, tossing away the blanket to show your squirming body. He licked his lips at the mess your made between your legs.

“How about I use my tongue instead…just how you like? Hm?…wanna make you feel good.”

[steddiealltheway]

Steve confesses to Robin that he has a crush on Eddie. She has a minor shut down moment and asks under her breath, “Why do all the gays flock together?” - having had both Max and Will come out to her recently.

She’s hesitant about Steve’s crush because… the bandana. And Steve isn’t dumb, he knows when Robin isn’t saying something she wants to. So, when he asks what’s wrong with Eddie, she asks Steve, “Have you heard of the hanky code?”

Steve shakes his head.

“It’s… it’s a gay code. Like people put a certain color handkerchief in a certain back pocket to flag others about what type of sex they want,” Robin explains, knowing her description isn’t as in-depth as the code, but hoping that will make Steve get the point.

“Okay?” Steve says as he doesn’t connect the dots.

“Steve… have you noticed the black bandana in Eddie’s back left pocket?”

“Yeah, of course,” Steve says. Robin gives him a look. “Oh.”

“Yeah, ‘oh’ is right.”

Steve’s eyebrows furrow together. “So what does it mean?”

Robin links her fingers together and takes a deep breath. “I’m not one hundred percent sure. Just about ninety-nine point nine nine percent sure. Plus, I did some research with Nancy who also noticed. And we’ve come to a conclusion. Granted… it may not be the correct one but-”

Steve puts his hand on Robin’s wrist and pleads, “Robin.”

“It’s for sadism and masochism top,” Robin finally blurts out. Steve freezes. “Please tell me you know that means because I really really don’t want to explain it to you.”

Steve scoffs, “Of course I know what that means.” His eyes widen. “Not like… I know it like that,” he clarifies.

Robin nods as Steve processes the information. She hesitates before saying, “I just… thought you should know before you said anything to him. That doesn’t seem like… you. Especially after the whole Russians and getting a plate smashed over your head-”

“Yeah, Rob. I got it,” Steve says. He runs a hand through his hair. “And you’re right. Thank you for telling me.”

“Of course,” Robin replies sincerely before launching into a full monologue about her time spent researching with Nancy.

-:-:-:-:-:-

Steve finds himself staring at Eddie while hanging out with him - specifically at the black bandana. And truly, he can’t see how Eddie could have that side to him. He’s not kink shaming, but Eddie’s just so… sweet and caring.

Plus, when Eddie had been recovering from the bat bites, he had confessed that he felt kind of bad for killing and hurting the bats. Even though they had been eating him alive. “Some metal things we have to leave to the heroes,” Eddie had explained, ignoring when Steve insisted he was a hero too.

Steve snaps out of the memory when Eddie waves his hand in front of his face. “I was starting to worried that maybe Vecna was back,” Eddie jokes. Steve’s learned that’s one of his coping mechanisms as Nancy calls it.

“Just lost in thought,” Steve replies.

“About what?”

Steve stares at Eddie. What an unintentionally loaded question. “You,” he replies without thinking.

“Steve Harrington, what could you possibly be thinking about me? Pray tell,” Eddie says with the widest grin.

Well, he asked for it. So here goes nothing. “I like you,” Steve states, watching Eddie’s eyes go wide. “Like, I really like you. And I was going to tell you, but Robin implied something that I didn’t know how to bring up.”

Eddie nods his head, eyebrows furrowed, but his expression remains frozen, processing what Steve has said. He does this for a few seconds and suddenly snaps out of it. “Wait, what did Robin say?”

Steve swallows. “You know that black bandana you wear?”

Eddie nods in response.

“Well, Robin explained it to me. And while that’s cool and everything. It’s just… not me. You know, after the whole getting tortured by Russians thing-”

“The what?”

“I don’t think I’m ready for any of… that. But hey, it’s cool that you’re so open about that. Plus, it must be fun to talk in code. I mean, who knew a black bandana in your left pocket could mean being a S&M top.”

“It means what?!” Eddie yells, standing up, face in full shock.

“You know, sadism and masochism… but why am I explaining that to you?” Steve says with a huff of laughter.

Eddie stares down at Steve in horror.

“Wait…” Steve trails off. “You didn’t know it meant that?”

Eddie throws his hands up and begins pacing. “I just thought it made me look cool! Jesus H. Christ! I’ve been wearing that bandana for months and-” He abruptly stops and looks at Steve. “Did you say you liked me?”

“Yeah.”

Eddie sits down and puts his head in his hands. “Hold on. Let me process everything you’ve told me.”

Steve patiently waits, staring as Eddie seems to go through a mini crisis for a few minutes. Steve checks his watch a couple of times, wondering if he should ask Eddie if he’s okay or leave him to his inner turmoil.

As Steve checks his watch for the fifteenth time, Eddie sits up and sighs. “I think I’m okay now.” He looks at Steve and says, “Nope, I’m definitely not.”

“What’s wrong?” Steve asks.

Eddie leans forward poking Steve’s chest. “You like me?” Eddie finishes the thought, poking his own chest.

Steve nods.

Eddie continues staring.

Steve offers him an awkward smile.

Eddie stares harder and nods. “Cool. Cool. That’s cool…” he trails off. “And you’re sure about that?”

Steve laughs. “Yes, Eddie.”

A thought crosses Eddie’s mind. He asks, “Will you kiss me, if I promise I’m not a S&M top?”

Steve laughs again and replies, “Yes.”

Eddie dramatically whips the bandana out of his back pocket and drops it on the ground, immediately rushing forward to meet Steve who was already leaning in for a sickeningly sweet kiss.