#i’m so excited about intelligent life ahhhhh

[shipsonmymind]

Kickstarter Link:

Since apparently some people genuinely haven't heard this yet??

(And that's okay! We're all here to keep each other informed!)

Six of the seven Tinlightenment projects will include DIGITAL TICKETS (and the one that doesn't is just the London version of an earlier project that will have digis. The only difference will be that the London performance will have a somewhat different and likely smaller cast)!

One of those projects is a new musical, the bread and butter of this fandom! Gross Prophets! Like Spies Are Forever and the fourteen Starkid musicals! And like those it will be put up ON YOUTUBE FOR FREE for everyone to watch as many times as they want!

One of their other projects, the comedy panel gameshow The Great Debate, will be put up ON YOUTUBE FOR FREE as well!

Starkid and TCB have a grand history of making the most accessible quality theatre out there, and Tinlightenment will be no exception! So if your only reason for not backing is that you think you won't be able to see the shows, think again!

And then think about it some more--what would have happened if only people in LA had backed TGWDLM and it hadn't met its goal?

[softrozene]

Sacrifice

@luna-hatake-uchiha​ requested: Hi. First of all, I want to wish you a happy new year. I read on Archiv of your Own that your request box is open... Soo could you please write a scenario where Law and his s/o are having a daughter and after a few years their daughter shows symptoms of the Amber Lead poisoning? And Law doing everything he can to heal her? (This is my first time doing this and I'm sorry if I sound rude somewhere.)

You were perfect in requesting Hon! Apologies for how late this is (I hope you had a good start to the new year!) but omg- That would be so heartbreaking ahhhhh. This came out pretty angsty but I tried to give it a neutral ending! I hope you enjoy it!

This turned into a one-shot oops.

Trafalgar Law x Female Reader

Warnings: Fluff/Angst- Spoilers of Law’s past. Can be considered a good or sad ending! Uhh Post-Pirating au? Law is retired from the pirate life lol, grammar

*Instead of 2nd pov I wrote this in 3rd pov for a change. : )

Also, yeah- I am pretty sure that Law would be able to cure his daughter of this because of his Devil Fruit and it’s “Miraculous” abilities but I went for the more angsty side, so I made it more complicated than that lol. I just love the idea of protective dad Law.

Words: 1983

-

The smell of coffee is usually a scent that brings the pregnant woman, (Name), a comfort since that means she can sneak a sip from her husband’s cup but right now… It is too early for coffee. He should be in bed with her, but the sun is not even up. With exhaustion evident on her face and the goal of finding Law and bringing him back to bed- She regretfully leaves the warm bed.

The house they have is a decent-sized home. Two bedrooms- The one they share together, and the guest room, a nursery that Law and (Name) have been working on and of course, Law’s office to store his medical books and journals, a kitchen, a bathroom, and a small cozy living room.

It felt like bliss living here.

Even more so with the bun in the oven. Law was in shock when he realized his wife was indeed pregnant, but it made the joy of retiring from piracy to enjoy a domestic life with her all the better. It most certainly eases his thoughts that most of his crew also retired here on this peaceful island.

Things could not have turned out more perfect for them.

Though… That was about to change as (Name) walks into his office- The light from it leaking out into the hallway. The smell of coffee gets stronger, and she smiles upon seeing how serious her husband is looking through some of his books.

No matter what he is doing, he looks so handsome.

Something he got used to arguing with her saying how she is crazy for thinking his eyebags are attractive. It was all jokes sure but (Name) was serious and proud to say he was handsome. His personality definitely that too. She can rely on him and him on her and that is something hard to do for the both of them.

Law is too in the zone in the book so (Name) uses that to her advantage. She sneaks up behind him and is quick to wrap her arms around his neck, planting a kiss on his cheek. His tense body immediately relaxes within her hold and he turns to offer her a tired smile.

“Did I wake you?” He asks softly as a hand comes up to meet her swollen belly.

(Name) laughs and holds his hand to her stomach. “Yes, but it is fine. I just got cold without your warmth. That and the beautiful smell of coffee. I think our daughter wants a sip.”

Law’s face turns into a scolding one immediately making his wife laugh as she continues, “Hey! You said I could have some in moderation! I think a tiny sip is less than that and yes, I know we do not know if our child will be a girl, but I just have this feeling…”

Law sighs but… Then smiles as he just shakes his head. He gives in knowing full well that his wife’s point was mainly about getting her daily sip of coffee in. He pulls away from his wife’s loving hand to reach for his mug of coffee. Being careful of the still-hot contents in it. He hands it to her and watches as she smiles and takes her desired sip. Handing it back to him he puts it on the desk and immediately pulls the pregnant woman onto his lap earning himself a giggle from her.

“Anyway, what are you doing up, my love?” She asks as she nuzzles her face into his neck the best she can.

At this question, Law turns tense. His sigh comes out stressed as he hesitates to speak. He thinks it would be better now to share his concern, especially when it is such a valid one.

“I… Fear that our child may get Amber Lead Poising. It is a hereditary disease,” Law mumbles.

This makes his wife freeze up. She knows his pain with that. The fear of it. He must have been bottling it up until he just could not ignore the possibility. With a gentle sigh, (Name) places a tender kiss on his lips, momentarily distracting him from his painful thoughts.

“My love, please come back to bed. After a few more hours of sleep, you can come back in here… And no matter what happens with our child- I have faith that you will find a cure. Until then, try not to worry. Otherwise, you are going to send yourself into an early grave by putting all that stress on your heart,” (Name) says as a yawn escapes her.

Law can only smile now. She truly is his best friend. His other half. She knows how to ease his worries even if it is temporarily, but what she said… It also rings true. He vows to find a cure in the case that their child will get that stupid disease.

~*~

The rest of the pregnancy goes by quickly and as soon as the baby, a girl, is in their arms it feels like total bliss for them. It is everything they never imagined having but makes their lives totally complete. Her middle name is in memory of Law’s younger sister. The full name being Trafalgar Lami Lin.

“She looks like you already- Look at those wide (eye color) eyes,” Law says with a gentle smile on his face.

He never imagined he could allow himself to be this soft and vulnerable. To share it with (Name). His wife laughs as she leans against his arm as he holds their little girl in his arms. Both (Name) and the baby are exhausted.

“Thank the gods she does not look like a mini sleep-deprived version of you. Well, if she takes my looks, I only hope she gains your intelligence,” (Name) jokes.

Law smirks at the playful tone and as if he remembers sighs- “I forgot to tell you. What is left of the crew will be coming here tomorrow. They were even more excited than us combined.”

“Looks like we got a couple of free babysitters… I trust Bepo with her. Sachi and Penguin might drop her.”

Law sweatdrops at this and wishes he could argue back but… His wife is right. He makes a mental note to have Bepo be their go-to babysitter.

~*~

Days pass by fast when you feel joy and they pass even faster when you feel like the world suddenly has a time limit on it. Law promised his wife to enjoy the days with them and he did, but he spent countless nights trying to find a cure- Getting so close to finding something that can help in the case his daughter gets the disease.

The baby grows quickly into a child, but it was the age of five when Law realizes that she has those stupid white spots on her skin- Meaning she has Amber Lead Poisoning. He felt like he was suffocating. She was not supposed to get it. He paid his dues during his piracy. His loss of Rosinante. His loss of family. He paid whatever the hell life thought he owed it, so she was supposed to be in the clear.

She was not.

He knows that is just wishful thinking. His whole family got it and Amber Lead is a hereditary disease. He was supposed to die at age thirteen. He did not all because he ate a fruit thanks to Rosinante. Just because he ate a fruit and cured himself does not mean he could actually cure Amber Lead with his fruit.

He could try and cure Lin as he did himself. Using the fruit’s "miraculous" properties which is having the ability to cure any kind of illness. However, this requires some extent of medical knowledge in order to be utilized effectively. He has that knowledge, but he does not have the full knowledge to cure others of this disease. He cured himself because he ate the fruit.

He needs a real cure. One to ensure that this disease does not follow into the genes anymore. He wants to ensure that if his daughter wants a family of her own- If she makes it to that age, he wants her to be able to not have to think about her own children having the disease.

He estimated she would only have a few years left. Until those white spots grow big enough to almost devour her. His blissful life turned into a nightmare for him. He always could not stand the thought of losing (Name) and the feeling was deeper with their daughter Lin since she was only a child.

She deserved a long and happy life.

He was going to sacrifice his time to ensure that.

It was during one of these nights when he cursed out life for being cruel that Law had an epiphany. Something in his research began to make sense for a cure- It was uncertain, but it was something and it was this night that his wife was woken up when he got up out of excitement to begin writing on a large board he put together. He accidentally dropped a book nothing too alarming, so he was surprised to see his wife checking on him.

Her large eyes watching the board- Trying to decipher his valid obsession of finding a cure. He could not contain his excitement as he pauses briefly to place a kiss on his wife’s lips.

“Whoa. You are super cheery for once,” She notes.

Law can only smile. “I think I am close to finding something. A cure. It would still be a while before I have something solid but… This is it. It has to be it.”

Hearing this fills (Name) up with excitement too. Only to see Law experience a crash. He is at his limit for tonight since he spent all day shopping with his daughter and wife to go to Penguin’s birthday (definitely an alcohol) party. He should be totally spent after today.

(Name) only hugs him feeling his body immediately relax into hers and he freezes upon remembering something. Pulling back slightly he looks at his darling wife and places a kiss on her forehead.

“Hey… I do need to tell you something. If this lead goes nowhere. I am going to use the Ope Ope no Mi fruit on her,” Law states.

(Name) freezes in his grip. Understanding these words. That means he is going to sacrifice his life for their daughter if he can’t make a cure. He is willing to use the fruit’s powers for what others have wanted it for. Immortality.

He is willing to grant their daughter “eternal youth” if it means she can experience life without the disease affecting her.

His mind is dead set on that backup plan so all (Name) Can do is nod. He smiles at her though as to reassure her.

“That is just a backup plan. We still have a few years left but as of now, I do believe it is time to get in contact with that crazy pirate- Luffy. I need him to bring Chopper here. With Chopper’s help this should work,” Law murmurs more to himself.

He is exhausted.

“Alright Love- I will go get in contact with them. I will send a letter. Though… I think you should head to bed. You did well. You are such a good father,” (Name) murmurs.

Hearing this… Law really feels like he might break. All of these restless nights are going to be worth something. He is going to do what his dad almost did for his younger sister. He will cure his daughter and be able to watch her grow.

“Law… You are getting my hair wet with your snot and tears.”

“Shut up,” He mumbles as he holds his partner.

She laughs and the two stay like that- Content that there is hope for their daughter.

[story-scribbler]

ACOSF - My Nesta Thoughts

I fell in love with Nesta so fast. I went into this book absolutely loathing her and I positively adore her now. She's so strong and such a freaking badass! 

These are basically all my Nesta thoughts. 

SPOILERS AHEAD!

1. I love how Nesta’s journey and growth wasn’t a simple journey. She made progress, took steps back, and made some more progress, and finally emerged as an amazing, intelligent, loyal, cunning, and caring woman. I loved the little milestones she sets for herself throughout the book: whether it was walking down the stairs to the House of Wind, or forcing herself to sit in front of a fire and work through her trauma. I cried when she had her final moment in the wilderness with Cassian, when she finally admitted out loud how broken she thought she was, because it just showed how she truly confronted her emotions. I teared up when she knelt to Amren on Starfall to apologize to her, because in that moment, Nesta exposed her true heart and vulnerability to one of her friends. I cried, yet again, when she forced Emerie and Gwyn to finish climbing Ramiel without her, as she made her final stand to protect her friends. In short, I love Nesta Archeron, and she is an amazingly beautiful character. 

2. Can we talk about the Valkyries? I definitely knew, from the little tidbits dropped in ACOMAF/ACOWAR/ACOFAS about the female Illyrians that Nesta would play a huge role in that. Her creating the unit with the priestesses was nothing short of incredible. She saw other women who had endured unspeakable traumas, like herself, and decided to reach out a hand to help them, despite not caring enough to help herself. It was amazing to see Cassian and Azriel’s reactions as they realized what Nesta was trying to accomplish, and as they realized that where they had not succeeded, Nesta could. 

3. The dancing. That’s it. And watching Nesta play Eris at his own game, and leave him in the dust. THE POWER.

4. Nesta and Emerie and Gwyn, aka the Sisterhood, the Valkyries, the overall BADASSES of the series! I am ecstatic that Nesta found her people, like Feyre did with Mor and Cassian. Their friendships were so wholesome, and they saw each other, with all their flaws, and extended their arms around one another. They lived, laughed, and teased each other endlessly, and their friendship was such a tangible, beautiful thing. It was such a powerful moment when they finally each opened up about their pasts during the Blood Rite. They all fully expected to be shunned by each other, but instead they forged even stronger bonds of love and loyalty. I CANNOT believe that she, Emerie, and Gwyn had MAGIC FRIENDSHIP BRACELETS.

5. Nesta and Cassian: I ship them, but to me, the book didn’t have as much of a focus on Nessian as I thought it would, and I’m totally okay with that! I liked how it focused more on Nesta’s healing, as well as the plot with Koschei. 

6. Nesta and Feyre. 

AHHHHH! I was so excited to read this book, mainly to see how Feyre and Nesta repair their relationship as sisters. It was interesting to see Nesta’s perspective on the events of their childhood, as Nesta felt like she failed her sisters by letting Feyre go out into the woods. I could really feel how the guilt and shame of those moments attacked Nesta, and clung to her. The same thing applies to Feyre and Nesta’s actions during the war, as Feyre was able to go save Elain, not Nesta. As revealed through Cassian’s POV, Feyre also had a lot of guilt when it comes to Nesta’s situation. She herself felt like she failed Nesta for letting her grief overwhelm her. Seeing how Nesta slowly started to realize how her actions hurt their relationship (not that Feyre is blameless, but this is from Nesta’s POV!) was amazing because she was able to face her faults. When she screamed at Feyre that the IC had been lying to her about the dangers of her upcoming childbirth, you could feel all the rage and pain that Nesta felt in those words, as well as the agonizing guilt that Nesta felt at causing her sister such pain. For her, her final redemption with her sister came as Feyre was about to die in childbirth, her stillborn baby and Rhysand with her (can we talk about how heartbreaking that moment was?). It was an incredibly loving, powerful moment when Nesta donned the three items of the Dread Trove to breathe life back into Feyre, Rhysand, and their unborn child. She showed true growth as she sacrificed her power to save her loved ones, and I definitely cried when she told Feyre “I love you,” the very first time she ever said those words, to anybody. With that moment, it was like Nesta and Feyre’s relationship was forged anew. Rhysand knelt, knelt, to Nesta for saving his family, his wife and mate, and his newborn son. The final piece of the puzzle was when Feyre painted Nesta fighting at the Breaking, as she hung her portrait among the others of her family. In short, I now love Feyre and Nesta equally (rot in hell, Elain). They are the image of strength and power, albeit in different ways. Feyre is softer than her sister, yet strong and unbreakable. She faced the news of her potential death with no small amount of courage. Nesta is sharp, cunning, quick. She is a fierce warrior like her sister, and is endlessly loyal. I will protect my powerful Archeron sisters forever and don’t y’all dare to turn them against one another. 

[wild-karrde]

Almost caught up, almost caught up, I will be DEVASTATED when I've run out of track here, but ALMOST CAUGHT UP.

YES. LOVE A GOOD QUICHE. DO THE THING, KAZI.

She was interested in Wolffe.  She was lonely and wanted a friend. She thought Wolffe might be interested in her. She was dramatizing her life and looking into nonexistent corollaries.  She wanted to be with Wolffe. Wolffe was a man she respected and trusted, and she was deluding herself into believing he wanted her.

Kazi, girl, I once again must reiterate, YOU HAVE IT BAD.

And yet she yearned for it. She yearned for the intimacy of trust and emotional connection. She yearned for the vulnerability of private conversations, lingering looks, and quiet moments. She yearned for soft touches and held hands and comfort beneath sheets.  She yearned for Wolffe in a way she didn’t deserve, and it scared her too, too much.

God, I get this. All of it. The wanting someone to share life with and to be safe with and to confide in, to be known by someone like that. And the feeling that YOU DON'T DESERVE IT WHEN YOU FIND IT. OOOOOOF.

Alright, is Fehr about to get a character moment that makes me like her more? It CERTAINLY seems that way.

“The clones made demands during negotiations.”

STARING.

“One of the clones’ demands was to release you from your work for the network.”

AHHHHH THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT.

The beginnings of rebellions were always simple, numbered with people willing to make immediate sacrifice for the long term. But as weeks turned into months, and months turned into years, one thing became clear: You couldn’t win through morals and ethics. 

I am nodding my head enthusiastically as this is also a theme that gets used in my fics. You are so right here. They always bloom with the best of intentions, but at some point, someone realizes the need to get in the mud and fight dirty. YES. JUST YES.

Also, I do really love Fehr talking through how her mindset has changed and warning Kazi. It makes her more human, and makes it clear there's a larger threat to Kazi, and how that unnerves her. This is JUST SO GOOD, Alli. This whole conversation is fantastic.

The men started for the house and, hastily, Kazi turned her attention to folding an already folded-blanket.

LOOOOOOOL

AND THEY'RE PLANTING THE SEEDS. THE METAPHOOOOORRR.

“You’re intelligent, Ennari. You’re a brilliant analyst.” Wolffe ran his tongue along his teeth. “And yet you’re fucking oblivious”—he shook his head—“Never mind.”

Oh God DAMMIT. (he's not wrong)

“I don’t want to pretend anymore.” Tentatively, he lifted a hand to her face, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “I don’t want to pretend I’m not interested in you.”

*screeching Karrde sounds in the distance*

“Kazi.” He said her name like it was a question and an answer; he said it in such a soft, intimate way she wanted to run far, far away. 

MARBLES ARE LOST. FORGOTTEN. NONEXISTENT.

THE KISS??

THE KISS.

IT'S EVERYTHING. IT'S PERFECT. IT'S SOFT. IT'S HOT. IT'S FILLED WITH PROMISE AND EXCITEMENT AND NEED AND JUST BRAIN IS EXPLODING PLEASE STAND BY.

WAIT. WUT. WHAT. NO. FUCK OFF. FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK.

COCK BLOCKED BY A FOOKIN' STAR DESTROYER.

ALLI HOW DARE YOU (affectionately). YOU WILL BE HEARING FROM MY LAWYER (affectionately).

I Yearn, and so I Fear - Chapter XVI

Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

General Summary. Nearly a year since the Galactic Empire’s rise to power, Kazi Ennari is trying to survive. But her routine is interrupted—and life upended—when she’s forced to cohabitate with former Imperial soldiers. Clone soldiers. 

Pairing. Commander Wolffe x female!OC

General Warnings. Canon-typical violence and assault, familial struggles, terminal disease, bigotry, explicit sexual content, death. This story deals with heavy content. If you’re easily triggered, please do not read. For a more comprehensive list of tags, click here.

Fic Rating. E (explicit)/18+/Minors DNI.

Chapter Word Count. 5.1K

Beta. @starstofillmydream

20 Yelona

Like most people, Kazi maintained certain self-destructive tendencies that, when willfully ignored, could and would fuck her over. 

In particular, her tendency to avoid a problem created an unhealthy handling of her emotions.

So, it wasn’t a surprise when her early-morning attempt to prepare quiche went awry. 

Originally, when she first prepared the dish for the men a month ago, it was her way to show her appreciation for their respectful cohabitation. A simple meal for them to take on their mission.

Eventually, though, her childhood interest renewed. Preparing the traditional dish reminded her of chilly mornings at the harbor. 

Sitting on a barrel while the ships prepared for their journeys, she listened to the sailors tell their tales of oceanic beasts and tumultuous storms. She snacked on her father’s leftover quiche, and when the ships were secured, she stood on the dock watching her father’s ship disappear on the horizon, eager for new stories upon his return. 

Unfortunately, this morning’s quiche preparation couldn’t distract her from her thoughts. Her emotions were scattered, and when she tried to pinpoint one, a conflicting one arose.

She was interested in Wolffe. 

She was lonely and wanted a friend.

She thought Wolffe might be interested in her.

She was dramatizing her life and looking into nonexistent corollaries. 

She wanted to be with Wolffe.

Wolffe was a man she respected and trusted, and she was deluding herself into believing he wanted her.

Gritting her teeth, Kazi glared at the lump of dough she was kneading. It was too floury. Too thick and coarse.

With a defeated sigh, she tossed the inedible batch, cleaned the counters and dishes, and washed her hands. Movement outside the sunroom’s windows—both Wolffe and Fox were outside when she returned from her swim, the former tending to the garden while the latter sanded the tree trunk he fell weeks ago—convinced her to leave the house and skip another awkward morning with Wolffe.

The past six days Kazi tried to act normal. Pretended her revelation lacked depth. Her attempts to remain casual and unbothered came across as aloof and apathetic. 

Ever observant, Wolffe commented on her unusual behavior yesterday morning. Flustered by his shrewd gaze and her tiny, persistent tug of yearning she tried and failed to snip away, she told him to mind his own business and then left. They hadn’t been alone since, though she had felt the heat of his gaze on her face most of dinner last night.

The drive to Hollow’s Town blurred in a tunnel of green and lightening skies. Typically, Kazi would appreciate the watery streaks of orange and the tendrils of a blooming sun, but her mind was too focused elsewhere. Namely, on the fear choking her. 

As a child, her mother told her stories about shooting stars. The stories were all the same: When you wished upon a star, your wish would come true. It might take months, perhaps decades, but it would come true. 

Over the years, her wish remained the same. A wish for romantic companionship. It was a secret she shared with dying stars, and dying stars only. Daria used to tease her for her secrecy, but she didn’t care. Her wish was special.

As she matured, though, Kazi realized the foolishness of her wish. 

Solitude couldn’t hurt her. 

Companionship could ruin her.    

Because it would never last. 

And yet she yearned for it. She yearned for the intimacy of trust and emotional connection. She yearned for the vulnerability of private conversations, lingering looks, and quiet moments. She yearned for soft touches and held hands and comfort beneath sheets. 

She yearned for Wolffe in a way she didn’t deserve, and it scared her too, too much.

“Kazi?”

The voice startled her from both her spinning thoughts and aimless wandering and, straightening, she nodded at Fehr. The older woman was dressed in loose trousers and a long-sleeve work shirt, her hair braided in an elaborate crown atop her head. She appeared ready for a long day at her farm. But it was the knowing look in her sharp gaze—the scrutinous intrigue belying her insouciant expression—that disconcerted Kazi. 

“Early morning?” 

“Something like that,” Kazi said, surveying her current location and noting her position on the outskirts of the Square. 

Fehr glanced at the chrono on her wrist. “You can join me for breakfast.” 

Her unapologetic tone brokered no room for argument, and Kazi bit the inside of her cheek, silently berating herself for not being mindful of her surroundings. She exhaled a mirthless breath and followed her fellow rebel. 

Fifteen minutes later and they were sitting outside a local café, the sole eatery open this early in the morning. A basket of cinnamon bread and mugs of steaming chocolate mush littered their cozy table. Kazi let her gaze wander from Fehr to the distant sky. 

Since the Square sat on a hill, it provided a stunning display of Eluca’s orange sunrise, the clouds flickering flames of a fire. The top of the sun, dark yellow and demanding attention, had breached the horizon. 

Sipping from her drink, Kazi observed the few patrons of the morning. A weathered man stood beside his flower stall, a girl—most likely his granddaughter—was cutting the stalks of the bouquets she was preparing. Kazi returned her attention to Fehr. 

Months had passed since she last connected with Fehr or any of the rebels, outside of Carinthia. She hadn’t minded the distance and lack of communication. She still harbored a grudge against Fehr’s political maneuvering. 

Setting aside her mug, she breached the silence. “Is the network in need of something from me?” 

“No.” Fehr plopped a piece of cinnamon bread into her mouth, chewing pensively. “We can speak together outside of the network. I hope you’re aware of that.” 

Kazi lifted an eyebrow. “The network is the only thing that matters to you.”

“Your assessment is more accurate for Bash.” Fehr paused. “Possibly Carinthia.”

“But not you?” 

Fehr eyed her warily. “You think poorly of me, Kazi, and I don’t blame you. I took advantage of your circumstances and used them to benefit the network’s mission. I wouldn’t trust myself either.”

The honesty in her voice surprised Kazi and she studied Fehr closer. Assessed the wrinkles deepening her eyes and the heaviness dulling her silver eyes. 

“When I met you, I saw a young woman burdened by the Empire,” Fehr said quietly. “Your skills, while not truly exceptional in the grander scheme of the network, were good enough for us to use. I thought you would be enraged, and I wanted to channel your rage to the detriment of the Empire. I was wrong.”

Kazi clenched her mug. “What do you mean you were wrong?”

“You lacked the rage I wanted—”

“I was angry at the Empire. I still am,” she interrupted. Her left hand started to tremble and she fisted it in her lap. “Don’t think for one minute that I wasn’t affected by the Empire’s invasion of my planet—”

“You were upset, but you were too distracted by other things.” Fehr stared at her pointedly and Kazi pursed her lips. “I thought you would jump at the opportunity to infiltrate the Empire and secure the intel we needed. I thought you could become an essential spy. But you lacked the desire to do so, and I realized, belatedly, my analysis of your character was inaccurate.”

A waiter joined them on the patio, readjusting the floral vines decorating the front of the café. Kazi took the moment of silence to neutralize her expression and collect her thoughts. She hadn’t known the depth of Fehr’s planning—the expectations. Knowing the network wanted to hone her anger to their benefit unsettled her. 

The moment the waiter returned inside, Fehr leaned across the table. “The network has one goal: to defeat the Empire.”

“I’m aware,” Kazi deadpanned.

“You’re not aware of it all.” Fehr’s voice was sharp, full of warning. “Command is willing to do whatever is necessary to achieve their goal. They’re not bound by morals and ethics. They’re willing to damn themselves for their cause.”

It wasn’t news to Kazi, and yet the seriousness lining Fehr’s features—the way her eyes darted around the café, as if she feared someone was listening or watching—sent a shiver of unease down her spine. Surreptitiously, she reconsidered their surroundings, noting each person present.  

“Command believes in playing by the Empire’s rules,” Fehr said, “and they will sacrifice anyone.”

Disregarding the erratic falter of her heart, Kazi lounged back in her chair, forcing herself to appear detached. Unflappable. “Are you threatening me?”

“I’m warning you.” Fehr glanced at the street, her lips pressing together. “Don’t upset Command.”

“I wasn’t planning on it.”

“What about the clones?”

Her eyes narrowed. “What of them?”

Fehr started to speak and then paused, her gaze sweeping across Kazi’s face. “The clones made demands during negotiations.”

“I was there.” 

“We renewed negotiations a month and a half ago. Bash, Carinthia, and me, along with the three commanders.”

She blinked her bewilderment. “Why?”

“They had certain demands and we felt you weren’t needed.” The woman seemed unsurprised by Kazi’s irritation, finishing her drink with an uncaring grace. She tilted her head to the side. “I wasn’t aware you had grown so close to them.”

Kazi chuckled bitterly. “Cohabitation will do that to people.”

“One of the clones’ demands was to release you from your work for the network.” Kazi dug her fingernails into her thigh, trying hard to hide her shock. It must not have worked because Fehr offered her a small, tired smile. “Bash struck it down but the clones were persistent. We came to an agreement: The work we requested of you would be vetted and approved by the clones first.”

Looking away, toward the black panther statue prowling the Square’s fountain, Kazi mulled the news, clamping down on her annoyance. Of course Wolffe would interfere without telling her. Of course he would ignore her requests to stay out of her business. 

“This angered Command,” Kazi assumed.

“Command doesn’t know the entirety of the story.” At her nonplussed frown, Fehr released a heavy sigh. “The network’s most recent actions have…bothered me.”

“Is that so?” She ran a finger along the side of her mug. “Have you realized they’ll sacrifice you for their cause? That they’ll do it without even hesitating?”

“I joined the network out of a self-righteous desire to save the galaxy,” Fehr said. “A year ago, the network was small and confined, dedicated to undermining the Empire. But we had morals—we had lines we wouldn’t cross.”

Kazi nodded in understanding. The beginnings of rebellions were always simple, numbered with people willing to make immediate sacrifice for the long term. But as weeks turned into months, and months turned into years, one thing became clear: You couldn’t win through morals and ethics. 

Most people never realized the true cost of rebellion. The cost of yourself. Because war—rebellion—required apathetic decision-making and a willingness to set aside personal ethics for a greater good. 

“I saw people hurting,” Fehr said. “And I was willing to do what was necessary to undermine the Empire. I didn’t question the actions of the new leadership.” She searched the Square once more and then lowered her voice to a whisper. “There are fanatics in the network. Bash is one of them. I will do what I can do to protect you and your family, but don’t cause trouble, Kazi, and tell the clones to lay low.”

The sheer vehemence in Fehr’s tone, her constant vigilance, unnerved Kazi. Unease slithered beneath her skin and she flattened her hands beneath her thighs to mask their shaking. “Is Bash going to reveal the men?”

“Their intel is too good to lose.” Fehr wrapped the remaining piece of cinnamon bread in a napkin. “So long as they remain necessary, they’re safe.”

All this time and Kazi hadn’t considered the precarity of the men’s situation with the network. And now, knowing Wolffe intervened—knowing the men were painting targets on their backs because of her—was both frustrating and disquieting. The network was her problem. Not theirs.

“Commander Wolffe seems…protective.” The comment drew her from her musings and Kazi tensed, throwing Fehr a bland look. Shrewd assessment narrowed the older woman’s gaze. “How are you getting along?”

“Fine,” Kazi remarked.

Fehr studied her for a long, quiet moment, her expression akin to sympathy. The woman chuckled and pushed herself to her feet, setting a handful of credits atop the table. 

“Solitude is a lovely thing,” Fehr said conversationally. “And more people should appreciate its beauty.” She levelled Kazi with a hard look. “Solitude feels safe and empowering. But spend too much time alone, and you’ll have to ask yourself: Is your solitude freeing, or is it lonely?”  

Frowning, Kazi eyed the woman before her.

Fehr smiled tightly. “I never opened myself to the possibility of being vulnerable with someone. Of loving someone. And I regret being so afraid.” 

Half an hour later, still seated alone at the bustling café’s table, Kazi searched the sunrise for an answer to a question she refused to ask herself. 

I regret being so afraid.

The phrase whispered in her ear like a haunting ghost. She hated the whisper; hated the hopelessness in the words; hated her understanding.

Kazi watched the arcing sun for a long time. 

“I can read to you.” The offer was out of her mouth before Kazi could consider its merit, and she winced, biting the inside of her cheek to mask her embarrassment.

Cuddling the stuffed animal Cody gifted her a week ago, Neyti looked up from the half-open book on her lap, surprise furrowing her eyebrows. 

It was later than usual, far past Neyti’s bedtime. But, since the men spent the late evening outside indulging in an expensive bourbon Fox had stolen from the last base they infiltrated, Kazi decided to make the night fun for Neyti, too. 

Together, she, Neyti, and Daria baked a cherry pie, and they enjoyed it while watching a holofilm Neyti chose. A popular film about a fox and a hound. One of Kazi’s favorites. 

Grinning, Neyti scooted to the edge of her bed and patted the vacated seat. Kazi chuckled her relief, settling into the pillows.

“Where do we start?” she asked. Neyti flipped the pages to the latter half of the book, and Kazi smiled, starting on the new story. “Once upon a time there was a princess.”

Five minutes later and Neyti was deep asleep, her stuffed whale cocooned between her arms. 

A bookmark placed for tomorrow night, Kazi pressed a light kiss to Neyti’s forehead, turned off the lights, and returned downstairs. 

The front door’s lock was checked. The living room and kitchen’s windows’ curtains were closed. The couch blanket was folded. Pillows were fluffed. From an open window in the sunroom, the hum of nocturnal bugs thrummed, and as Kazi started to pull the curtains together, she paused. 

The men were sparring. 

Shirtless, sweat slicking their skin beneath the moons’ light, Wolffe and Fox circled one another. The former sported a cut to his lip and the latter a bluing bruise on his cheek. Fox said something—a taunt based on Cody and Nova’s laughter—and Wolffe grinned, his teeth bloody. A sharp jab earned a harsh huff from Fox. 

Kazi shook her head, but she didn’t look away.

Chests heaving, the two men exchanged punches. A jab at Fox’s ribs turned into a punch at Wolffe’s stomach.

Blood trickled down Wolffe’s chin and he spat a wad of it into the ferns. It was a feint. And Fox fell for it. Wolffe threw him to the ground. Cody called the match.     

The men started for the house and, hastily, Kazi turned her attention to folding an already folded-blanket. The back door swung open. Wolffe and Fox moved to the partition separating the sunroom and living area. They both paused, standing together, their murmurs quiet. An effective barrier to her escape. 

Sighing her exasperation, Kazi straightened Wolffe’s puzzle, mindful of his color-coordinated piece groupings. Cody and Nova trudged into the house, bid her goodnight, and left. 

The sunroom was tidy—someone had recently cleaned, and it wasn’t her, which was confusing—and she glanced at Wolffe and Fox. Either noticing her stare or finished with their conversation, they broke apart. Fox clapped Wolffe on the shoulder, winked at Kazi, and then followed his two other brothers.

Kazi and Wolffe were alone. 

It wasn’t a novel situation; they spent lots of time alone, considering their morning routines overlapped. But something about tonight—something about the calculation in Wolffe’s gaze—made her well aware of their aloneness. 

Wolffe approached her, the top clasps of his shirt unfastened and his sleeves carelessly rolled to his elbows. His lip was slightly swollen; a hint of blood darkened the corner of his mouth. Nighttime shadows complemented his appearance, emphasizing the strength of his jaw and the black of his hair, caressing the veins of his forearms and the muscles in his neck. 

“You’ve been avoiding me,” Wolffe said. 

The warmth of his voice told her he was teasing, and a smile tugged at her mouth, the urge more common these days. She rubbed her arm, awkwardly trying to scrub away the truth. The truth that he made her smile.

“I haven’t planted the seeds you gave me.” She angled her chin to the packet sitting on the game table beside his puzzle. The packet she had brought downstairs before the holofilm. “I wasn’t sure if they had specific instructions, and I didn’t want—”

“I can show you.” Wolffe closed the distance between them. The beginning of a smirk revealed itself. “I’ll go slow for you.”

“How magnanimous.” She rolled her eyes to hide her amusement. 

Apparently Wolffe had been waiting for her request because he was quick to retrieve a large black pot from the garage. A pot he purchased weeks ago. It was large enough to house a lissome tree, and heavy enough he grunted from exertion as he set it beside a window. 

Kazi stood back, shifting between her feet, wanting to help but not wanting to get in his way. Wolffe left a second time and returned with a nine-kilogram bag. 

“It protects against disease,” he said, noticing her subtle attempt to read the fertilizer’s package. “This plant isn’t native. And it struggles to survive outside its home planet. The fertilizer should strengthen it.”

Bemused by the plant’s history, Kazi considered the tiny seeds in her palm. “What is it?” 

Wolffe ignored her question, and she decided not to press him, sprinkling the seeds into the soil. Together, they buried the seeds. The soil was cool to her hands, drier than Eluca’s natural soil and it smelt familiar—

A flash of lightning splintered the black sky. Thunder roared, a lulling echo across the jungle’s hills. 

Chilled dirt clumped her palms and Kazi sat back on her haunches, wiping her hands clean with a rag Wolffe tossed her. She watched him clean his own hands. “When were you going to tell me about your deal with the network?”

His shoulders grew rigid; annoyance clenched in his jaw. Wary eyes met hers. “Who told you?”

“That was dangerous,” she said, bypassing his question. “You now have targets on your backs—”

“It’s not your concern.” Wolffe continued to wipe his hands on the dirty rag. “We knew the risks. The reward outweighed them.”

“Why would you do that? Why would you interfere?” She frowned at him. “You don’t owe us anything. You shouldn’t risk your lives for us.”

Slowly, Wolffe folded the rag and set it atop the table, levelling the full weight of his gaze on her. His expression was unapologetic. Unflinching. “Why do you think I did it?”

“I don’t know.” She curled her fingers into the brim of the pot, trying to steady the increasing beat of her heart. She didn’t want to assume things—she refused to assume things. “I don’t…”

“You’re intelligent, Ennari. You’re a brilliant analyst.” Wolffe ran his tongue along his teeth. “And yet you’re fucking oblivious”—he shook his head—“Never mind.”

Sighing, he raked a hand through his hair and pushed himself to his feet, leaving her alone. The sound of the kitchen sink drifted to the sunroom.

Kazi moved to the windows. Loosening her braids and slipping the ties into a pocket, she watched the electric storm outside. Flashes of lightning burst; the clouds they hid behind glowed eerily. 

It seemed nature roiled with its emotions. Kazi could relate. 

Soft footfalls alerted her to Wolffe’s return. 

The silence between them hesitated, teetering with unspoken confessions. 

Wolffe stood close enough their arms brushed. The back of his hand grazed hers.

“We had storms like this. On Kamino,” he said quietly. “When I was young, I thought the waves would swallow our building and we’d drown. I woke up early every morning to practice my swimming in case it happened.”

“Always so prepared,” she murmured.

“I like to be.” He rolled his shoulders back. “I don’t like to enter a situation without knowing my advantages and my opponent’s strengths. I assess the complications and calculate the risk and reward. Only then do I make a decision.”

Another flicker of lightning seared the sky but her eyes remained on Wolffe.    

“I don’t want to pretend anymore.” Tentatively, he lifted a hand to her face, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “I don’t want to pretend I’m not interested in you.”

Her hands started to tremble.  

“I want to try things,” he said.  

His tone was resolute in his decision, but she detected a modicum of vulnerability. A hint of fear.

Cottony panic suffocated her lungs. 

Yearning, soft as an embrace yet insistent as a kiss, urged her forward. 

But she couldn’t move. 

Such cold, teeth-aching fear swallowed her, a creature of dark pits latched onto her ankle and dragging her far, far below. She looked away, out the window at the harshening lightning.

Because she couldn’t bear the intensity of his gaze. The unspoken desires. The gentle promises. 

“Look at me.”

Her heart cowered in her chest and she shook her head. She wasn’t meant for the softness in his voice, the longing in his eyes. 

She was meant to be alone. Solitude couldn’t hurt her. 

Solitude would never abandon her.

“Look at me.”

His tone was harder yet still gentle, like a steadying hand on an elbow. No longer a request, it was a command. An order. 

But to look him in the eye would quiet her doubts and unleash the yearning she was struggling to withhold. It was escaping, a rope burning her palms as the control of her head gave way to the want of her heart.

She was scared. She was so fucking scared.

“Kazi.” He said her name like it was a question and an answer; he said it in such a soft, intimate way she wanted to run far, far away. 

Two fingers tilted her chin back and forced her to meet his gaze. His thumb slid along her jaw and she shivered.

“You’re overthinking things,” Wolffe said calmly. He cupped her face, his thumb grazing her cheekbone. The expression on his face was steady. An anchor for the worst of a storm. “Trust me with this.”

“I don’t know how to,” she whispered.

“I know.” Softly, a hand palmed her waist and Wolffe lowered his face to hers. “But I’ve got you.”

“You don’t want this.”

He released a hoarse scoff. “You have no idea what I want.”

Their lips brushed, the barest of a grazing, and Kazi angled her head back, wanting more yet withholding herself. Wolffe paused. A mere hairsbreadth separated their faces, and she leaned forward, just enough their lips touched, her lashes fluttering as she sighed. 

An unspoken permission; an unspoken request. 

Wolffe moved, his mouth skimming hers. He pulled back a fraction. Their eyes met, and he closed the distance, seeking her, his upper lip embracing her cupid’s bow. 

He was soft, chaste in his intent. 

Warmth flushed her cheeks, honeyed and thick, and, gods, she wanted more. Needed more. She reached for his bicep, squeezing him, feeling the sheer corporeality of him. His muscles tensed beneath her touch, and Wolffe gripped her waist harder, his fingers slipping beneath her sweater. They were coarse against the skin of her lower back, exploring her spine, touching and grasping and desperate. 

Desire quivered through her body and she snagged his belt. Pulled him closer. Pulled him flush to her body.

Wolffe released a low groan that had her nipples tingling. The restraint he exercised—the control of his kiss, the careful patience in his touches—snapped. He kissed her harder, and Kazi clung to the back of his neck, silently begging for him to stay. To not let go. To taste her and pleasure her and know her.

The hand on her cheek drifted beneath her jaw, hooking. Gentle possessiveness flexed in his fingers. Wolffe teased the seam of her mouth, and she parted her lips, his tongue brushing hers, light and cautious, a playful plea to indulge. So she did, flicking the tip of her tongue to his. 

At her gasp for air, Wolffe moved lower, kissing beneath her jaw, trailing light touches down her neck while guiding her backwards. Her back hit the windows and she tilted her head back, sighing at the ardent press of his mouth to her throat. He reached her collarbone and sucked on her skin, sucked and bit. 

Heat thrummed in her blood; her breasts were heavy, tight with need. She played with the soft curls at the nape of his neck, shuddering and gasping as Wolffe sucked on the joint between her neck and shoulder. Desperation groaned against her skin and Wolffe pressed her fully against the window, the hand on her neck trembling. 

Their breaths were heavy when Wolffe leaned back, just enough to stare her in the eye. Darkened desire, near feral in its intent, contrasted the gentle brush of his thumb beneath her jaw. 

Wolffe kissed her again. Slower, deeper. She could feel him smiling against her lips, and her own smile answered in return.

With each of his kisses, with each curious, slow stroke of their tongues, Kazi wanted more. She wanted to feel him—to feel his skin against hers, to feel the shiver in his muscles as she touched him, to feel the heat of his body consuming her. She wanted his naked body pressed to hers, his arms around her and his legs entangled with hers until their bodies were inseparable. 

She wanted all of him, and it was so, so wrong of her. 

Nestling a palm between the unbuttoned clasps of his shirt, Kazi flattened her hand to Wolffe’s chest. Heated skin licked at her fingers. The rapid beat of his heart kissed her palm.

Even though the touch was minimal, Wolffe moaned a ragged “Fuck.” 

The rasp of his voice was hoarse and he ground his hips into her stomach. He was hard, and the feel of him—the reminder of what they were doing—made her pull away. Wolffe lowered his gaze to the spot where he was grinding against her. His breaths were uneven, and he slotted a thigh between her legs, pressed it against her—

“Oh.” A jolt of pleasure, sharp and acute, ached between her legs and Kazi smacked the back of her head against the window. 

“Ah, fuck.” Wolffe moved his thigh against her, his eyes half-hooded. “I’ve wanted—”

He cut himself off and kissed her. Kissed her with such need she was lost in him. Lost to his touches and unspoken demands for her attention. 

The steady pressure of his thigh rubbed her harder. She moaned against his mouth, rolling her hips against him, seeking the relief he was providing. Uncontrollable thrusts rolled into her stomach and she slid her hand between their bodies, squeezing his cock. 

“Fuck,” Wolffe hissed, jerking into her palm. 

She watched him, watched the bob in his throat and the way his lashes fluttered, as she squeezed him harder. His groan, strained and pained, made her smile. 

Distantly, she wondered if she got him off now, maybe he wouldn’t want to have sex. Maybe this would be enough for him, and then tomorrow, when she was thinking clearer, she could figure out what the fuck she was doing. Because the thought of sex—

Wolffe grabbed her wrist, pulling her away from his cock. She frowned at him.

“Will you…” He searched her face, swallowing. His gaze dropped to her mouth and he cleared his throat, inhaling a harsh breath. A subtle guardedness sharpened his eyes. “Will you regret this tomorrow?”

“No,” she said. And it was the truth—she could never regret him. “Will you?”

A small, sad smile curved his mouth.

“Never,” he murmured. “Never, Kazi.”

He pressed his forehead against hers, his hands clinging to her waist like he feared she might try to run. 

It was late and she was tired and she wasn’t thinking, but she wanted him because it was only him she trusted; and she was so desperate for him to see her and choose her; and she needed to know that maybe she wasn’t so unlovable. That maybe this man she yearned for perhaps yearned a little for her too. 

So she closed her eyes and, just for this moment, allowed herself to rest in the secure warmth of his presence, her hand still flattened to his chest. The beat of his heart caressed her palm, like the echo of a promise to his words. 

Soon, though, Wolffe tensed beneath her hands, pulling his forehead from hers. He looked over his shoulder, his head cocked to the side, and then he straightened. A muscle flexed in his jaw and he glanced her over, adjusting her shirt, flattening a few pieces of her hair. 

Understanding his intent, she buttoned his shirt. He hastily adjusted himself. They stepped apart just as Cody stalked into the room. Fox and Nova followed, the former glancing between her and Wolffe, suspicion furrowing his brows.

Tension radiated from the three men as palpable as Eluca’s humidity. Clenched jaws. Squared shoulders. Narrowed eyes. 

Their unease made Kazi stiffen; her stomach coiled with apprehension. 

“What happened,” Wolffe demanded.

“Just received an alert from Rex.” Disappointment hardened Cody’s voice and he nodded at the window. “See for yourself.”

Fisting her hands to hide their trembling, Kazi looked outside. Her heart stumbled to a halt. 

For outside, bracketed by brilliant flashes of lightning, hung a Star Destroyer.

The Empire had arrived.

Masterlist | Chapter 15 | Chapter 17

A/N: I will be taking the next two weeks off to allow myself some time to relax between chapter postings. Thank you for understanding. PS: We're halfway through this story!

Next chapter release – May 9th   

Tag: @ulchabhangorm

[amixedwitch]

🦆

ahahaha thank you anon for sending another duck!

another mutual that has had a profound effect on my Tumblr experience so far has been @thusatlas

For one, she’s just an amazing mutual to talk to. You can tell that her mind is so rich, sophisticated, and full of information. I just would love to spend an entire day just picking through her brain. LIKE SHE JUST RADIATES INTELLIGENCE LIKE WHAT THE HECK. 

SHE’S BASICALLY THE DREAM CREATIVE FRIEND AND THE IDEAL PERSON YOU WANT IN A WRITERS GROUP BECAUSE A) HER STUFF IS AMAZING AND B) WHEN SHE ASKS YOU ABOUT YOUR WELLBEING AND CREATIVE PROCESS YOU KNOW SHE GENUINELY MEANS IT FROM THE BOTTOM OF HER HEART!!

Secondly, HER FICS ARE FUCKING AMAZING. ALL OF THEM!!!! If anyone wants an exciting HP post-war slowburn fic with all sorts of twists and turns that is drenched with philosophy, metaphysics, and spirituality I STRONGLY RECOMMEND THAT YOU THE CROWNLESS: PART I -THE FUCKENING BECAUSE IT’S SUCH A SEXY FIC LIKE HOLY FUCK. And by I mean that everything and everyone in the story is so intriguing and electrifying that it’s intellectually and creatively sexy!!!!!!! I AM HOOKED TO THIS FIC!!!!! BUT SERIOUSLY READ EVERYTHING!!! I LOVE HER DEPICTION OF DRAMIONE AS BOTH A COUPLE AND AS DYNAMICS!!!!! YOU BECOME SMARTER BY READING THIS AND YOU WANT TO BE JUST AS SMART AND SEXY AS THE CHARACTERS!!! AHHHHH

(Side Note: As a fellow fanfic writer, that The Fuckening is magnum opus level stuff. like you read it and you’re just soooo inspired to create something of your own that is soooo epic) 

I JUST SIMP SO HER SO HARD AND HER REBLOGS ARE SO FUCKNG AMAZING LIKE SHE’S SO FUCKING COOL LIKE I’VE NEVER WANTED TO EMULATE A MUTUAL SO MUCH IN MY LIFE. I LOVE SEEING WHAT SHE REBLOGS BECAUSE SHE HAS JUST GOOD TASTE IN ART AND CONTENT AHHHHHH I LOVE HER SO MUCH

Also I remember when I first wrote about my temptation to delve into fanfic, she slid into the replies and simply wrote “DO IT” and it gave me the necessary push/excuse to just do go for it!!!!!! She really gave me the necessary courage and bravado i needed to fully delve into writing HP fanfic and becoming a full time HP fangirl. 

Basically what I’m trying to say is:

@thusatlas SUPREMACY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

AHHHHHHH I LOVE YOU AND YOUR WORK SOOOO MUCH AND BEING TAGGED BY YOU IN THINGS IS LIKE HAVING YOUR EXISTENCE ACKNOWLEDGED BY DA VINCI OR MICHELANGELO  

(Send me emojis for my 800 celebration!)

[sharonaw]

OC Interview

Tagged by @marvilus73, I’m so sorry I have been so bad at getting around to these. School has been AHHHHH.. lol

name ➔ Louise Nora Smith, General Smith to you...

are you single ➔ No. Maybe. It’s complicated.

are you happy ➔ Am I happy?... That’s a loaded question… Am I happy overall? No, but I try to find happiness every day.

are you angry ➔ Yes, almost all the time. It just bubbles right under the surface.

are your parents still married ➔ I never knew my real parents but my adoptive parents were happily married until the war.

NINE FACTS

birthplace ➔ San Francisco, California… At least that’s what my birth certificate says.

hair color ➔ I’m a burnett. Nothing exciting.

eye color ➔ My eyes are hazel. 

birthday ➔ May 5th, 2049.

mood ➔ Apathetic… at best.

gender ➔ Female

summer or winter ➔ Winter. It doesn’t get cold anymore. I’m kind of bummed I slept through the nuclear winter part.

morning or afternoon ➔ Can I cheat and say evenings?

EIGHT THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE

are you in love ➔ Yeah, I really think I am. It’s not like I set out to look for someone after Nate and it was very difficult to trust anyone after what had happened but… Yes, I love someone.

do you believe in love at first sight ➔ That’s how I fell in love with Nate...

who ended your last relationship ➔ A mercenary putting a bullet in my husband.

have you ever broken someone’s heart ➔ Yeah, and it almost killed me.

are you afraid of commitments ➔ At one point in my life I didn’t. Now is a different story. 

have you hugged someone within the last week? ➔ Most definitely. 

have you ever had a secret admirer ➔ Not that I know of. Not like in the “drops off letters in your locker” sort of way.

have you ever broken your own heart? ➔ Yes. I had no choice.

SIX CHOICES

love or lust ➔ Last time I checked they don’t have to be exclusive.

lemonade or iced tea ➔ Ever heard of an Arnold Palmer… Damnit! Now I want one.

cats or dogs ➔ I have a pupper. He’s one of the best things to happen to me recently.

a few best friends or many regular friends ➔ A few best friends. Earning trust is everything to me.

wild night out or romantic night in ➔ Wild night out. They are few and far between.

day or night ➔ So, it was cheating by saying evening?

FIVE HAVE YOU EVERS

been caught sneaking out ➔ Yes, countless times.

fallen down/up the stairs ➔ Today?

wanted something/someone so badly it hurt? ➔ I think that's a prerequisite to being human. 

wanted to disappear ➔ Only once, but that wasn’t for me.

FOUR PREFERENCES

smile or eyes ➔ Eyes. Perceptive ones that seem to see through you.

shorter or taller ➔ Taller. For obvious reasons. 

intelligence or attraction ➔ Intelligence. I have to be able to hold a conversation.

hook-up or relationship ➔ Relationship. Hook-ups have a place but I prefer relationships. 

FAMILY

do you and your family get along ➔ I am the last of my family.

would you say you have a “messed up life” ➔ It started off that way, then wasn’t, then it was again.

have you ever ran away from home ➔ No.

have you ever gotten kicked out ➔ No.

FRIENDS

do you secretly hate one of your friends ➔ No. That’s not what a friend is...

do you consider all of your friends good friends ➔ Yeah or they wouldn’t be a friend.

who is your best friend ➔ I don’t want to hurt anyone's feelings. So, I’m just going to say I have a group of best friends.

who knows everything about you ➔ Deacon knows more than he probably should, stuff I didn’t even tell him. Then there’s Danse, I’ve told him everything, all of it.

Alrighty, I’m tagging @tarenel, @maxrev, @derelict-blade, @sneakywitch-thief, @tess-etc, @gaeadene, and anyone else who wants to do it! 

[ramblesofadreamerofthestars]

Anne With An E S03Ep08 “Great And Sudden Change”

 - Ka’kwet! Oh you brilliant starfish child, you saved yourself and got away. Also, this milkman, is this the same one from the beginning of s1? 

- Ahhhhh Diana and Anne. This h u r t s

- Fucking hell I knew it.They burned down the school. Bitch what the Fuck. They really going to try and pretend like this was an accident? You Stole the Printing Press.

- Wow props to the actors for this scene, their devastation over this cruelty cuts deep. And Ms. Stacie coming through once again as a brilliant teacher, and someone to look up to. 

- Anne your fury is as always righteous and you’re doing amazing sweetie but Rachel probably isn’t the right target. Oh... Rachel. Her character definitely has it’s ups and downs but I’m glad she’s taking an active stance in this.

- Ka’kwet is so capable and intelligent, I Love Her. I hope she makes it home so badly, she deserves to be loved and cherished and I hope I hope I hope that this leads to the rest of the children at the residential school being saved. Knowing what I know of history, I doubt it. 

- Once again, I’m really glad Moira chose to include this and made it such a major plot in season 3, because this is a part of history that is glossed over in classrooms and absolutely should Not be

- Ooooh Hazel LaCroix has arrived. This should be interesting, based on how Bash has spoken about his mother in the past. I hope she’s here to reconcile and make up for past mistakes, Bash could really use some good things going for him right now. 

- lksjdlfjfldsj Moody and Ruby are so cute they snuck up on me and I adore them

- Anne and Gilbert sitting together by the window... completely relaxed and bodies angled to each other... poetic cinema

- Lol, Ms.Stacie being a mood as always

- Shirbirt is so cute I can’t

- aslkdckej what is this trilling music?? Is she casting a spell???

- oof. sorry Anne

- OOF. DIANA AND JERRY. WOW THIS HURTS! WOW THIS HURTS A LOT. Diana. Diana you don’t have to do this. Literally all you have to say is “no of course I’m not too good for you. This is just... painful. 

- AUNT JOSEPHINE? how did she know to come? Disturbance in the force? Also loving this music as Diana walks toward herself in the mirror’s reflection, very reminiscent of montage music set to a character undergoing a significant change in who they present themselves to be.

- Diana. I could write an entire essay on my feelings about Diana. She feels so trapped and for a few brilliant moments it seemed like she was breaking free and learning to take what she wanted in life, but she seems so scared now, and so lost and confused. Of course she’s going to say she’s going to finishing school - it’s what her parents have been molding her into for her entire life, and of course in this moment when she’s so lost on what to do next she’d fall back on the already laid out plan for her. And yet even so, I wish  she would write the exams, just like Josephine says. Better to try, and know that it’s an option then shooting yourself in the foot. Oh Diana, my beautiful imperfect daughter, I want you to have all the happiness and freedom you deserve, not to be stifled by ridiculous notions of society

- (I have a lot of feelings about Diana Barry)

- ayyyyy Auntie Jo really went “ya basic” huh. Diana please wake up, listen to your aunt. But wow, this must be heartbreaking for Diana, it must really feel like everyone is leaving her. 

- Oof and here we have Hazel’s first big indicator that her son’s life is not the same as her own. I really don’t blame her for falling back on the only thing’s she’s known her entire life, but you can see where that desire and drive to protect her son ends up hurting him. 

- ... Anne’s geometry prep seems so easy is this really all you needed to get into uni

- Matthew. “You’re as smart as they make them” he as so much faith in her, both him and Marilla and WOW I love the Cuthberts. 

- LET! KA’KWET! MAKE! IT! HOME! SAFE!

- this is the most awkward tea everYES! YES DIANA PLEASE BE GOING TO WRITE THE QUEEN’S EXAM. Josephine’s little knowing smirk is everything I Love This

- Wow. Ya ok wow this is exactly what exam prep is like and I feel this panic in my soul. Y’all are going to do great!

- Ahh! Their shouts of Diana are so good for the soul and look at how alive she looks this is So Good!! She’s so happy and proud of herself, I’m so proud of her

- No seriously, was this literally all it took to get into university....

- ... Y’all this pen going to come back isn’t it

- ahhh this is giving me flashbacks and anxiety No Thanks. Good luck to all of them (except Billy if he’s there, fuck Billy)

- Absolute legend Marilla teaming up with force of nature Rachel, get fucked you angry old boiled socks

- YES! YES LOOK AT THEM GO THEIR SO BRIGHT AND BEAUTIFUL AND ALIVE AND THEY’RE STILL CHILDREN AND YET NOT QUITE ANYMORE AND LOOK AT HOW HAPPY AND FREE THEY ARE RUNNING OUT OF THE EXAM.

- wow it’s real “Excitement over one stage of life ending but what comes next hours” huh

- yes Diana live your best fucking life! I’m so proud of all of them but her especially I’m so glad she chose this. 

- Ah. The Rose household. So glad we’re here.

- In all seriousness though, nothing against Winnie she’s amazing in her own right but she’s not the one for Gilbert and the sooner he realizes this the sooner they can both move on with their lives.

- Wow. Mr. Winnie’s Dad sir, you’re sure being super subtle about this

- Side note, I know their all growing up and it’s different back then with expectations of age, but he’s just... so young. Gilbert is so young and Winnie is already so much more experienced then him. 

- Yes! Yes this is what I want! These kids deserve a night to just Have Fun and be as wild and carefree as their hearts desire. Their growing up yes, but they’re not grown up now, and I’m so happy with the pure light and joy emanating from these kids. 

- Oh my gods. Oh my Gods. The soft fairy music, the fire light. Anne is a beautiful creature of sparks and magic, ethereal and fae and look at how Gilbert looks at her. He loves her so much oh my gods this is perfection thank you Moira for my life. 

- ...I’m so soft

- Holy Fuck my heart. “Just...one thing” he’s so gone on her and she’s falling so deeply for him. 

- lmao Anne’s drunk out of her fucking mind Gilbert this was a terrible time to do this is2g these two

- He’s so fucking heartbroken baby. Y’all need to learn to communicate Gilbert she wasn’t rejecting you I’m so ahhhhh

- Wow! These two really be on the same braincell energy. Soulmates!

-Bash, I adore you so much his and Gilbert’s relationship is so well done and I love him and the way he teases Gil. Also Bash has been team Shirbert since the beginning and his little dance is everything. Lmao the difference between when he though Gil was going to marry Anne vs when it was Winnie...telling.

- “Now now, no need to be hysterical” FUCK EM UP MARILLA AND RACHEL!!! FUCK EM UP RACHEL!!!

- I have no words for Ka’kwet’s reunion with her mother and her people besides that now I’m crying

- wow, Minnie May serving up truth to both Diana and about the unrealistic expectations placed on siblings when placed in competition with each other

- yes Marilla! look at her go! Also Anne I know you’re dealing with a lot but like... you maybe want to show a bit more enthusiasm?!?!

- thank you. Thank you So Much for Diana and Anne, this is amazing and I’m so glad my two beautiful daughters have come through this stronger and better than ever. 

- “ Here's the truth: friendships between women are often the deepest and most profound love stories” - Emily Rapp            ~perhaps a point was made

- Wow that’s really how we’re going to end that huh!

Final Thoughts:

F i n a l l y Anne has said it out loud. I can’t wait for the absolute disasters that are sure to prevent these one braincell geniuses from actually talking to each other. No but for real, I’m so excited for the next stage of their relationship, though I’m sure it will be just as agonizing to watch them figure out how to move forward. Ka’kwet is home safe! While I really just want her to stay and be happy with her life, I doubt that is what will happen. Nevertheless, she’s amazingly strong and intelligent and the injustices done to her in the series are sickening, and it’s important to remember that all these things really happened to the indigenous population in Canada, and that reconciliation and amendments are still in the works today. The last residential school in Canada close in 1996. This is not a distant memory of the past, it is a crisis, the ripple effect still being felt in the indigenous communities today. Bash and his mother have such an interesting dynamic, as it’s clear that her life experiences and her love for her son cause her to act in ways that while done with the best intentions, end up hurting him, and it will be interesting to see how awae handles this. And finally, my girls, Anne and Diana. I’m so proud of Diana this episode, for taking yet another step closer to her own freedom, and I’m so proud of the two of them for recognizing their mistakes and refusing to let it come between them. Next episode, I assume will deal with the fallout of Ka’kwet running away from the school, Gil about to propose to Winnie and what Anne plans to do now that she knows what she is feeling, and expansion on Bash and Hazel’s relationship and I can’t wait. 

[harry-leroy]

the give you a character meme: Henry V and Henry VI. (it's lisa btw)

“Hi! Thank you so much for this:) (And I hope your tumblr gets fixed soon because that is no fun :/ ). 

Henry V will be above the cut and Henry VI below! 

HENRY V 

do I like them:

Like… what a man yes I love him. 

5 good qualities:

strong, spiritual, knows when to be jocund and when to get down to business, excellent politician, unyielding 

3 bad qualities:

anxious, sometimes harshly brutal, also like if you’re going to conquer France then learn some French my sweet summer child (if we’re using Shakespeare’s version hehehe) 

favourite episode/etc:

I love him in Henry IV, Part I the most. But any Hal is wonderful. (I am so excited for The King though ahhhh) 

otp:

Hal x Catherine (otp: take a soldier) I just have so many feelings about these two. The Hal Survives AU is like one of my favorite AUs of all time because I love these two so much - and their son is such a sweet summer boy and I love that entire family dynamic. Also, best wooing scene in Shakespeare’s canon, hands down. 

brotp:

Hal x Poins (Will I ever get over the fact that Poins calls Hal “my sweet honey lord”? Absolutely not.) 

Hal x Falstaff (one of the most beautiful and heartbreaking friendships in the canon) 

ot3:

Hal x Henry IV x Richard II (every fic I read where these three are in it is just an absolute joy. Sometimes a little angsty, but I love this dynamic more than words.) 

Hal x Catherine x Henry VI (I would absolutely adore more fics with these three because again, the Hal Survives AU gives me so much life. Like, it waters my crops and clears my skin. Hal and little Henry have so much in common - even though they have a world of differences between them too - but what they share is so so powerful and ahhhhh I just need more of them in my life). 

notp:

I don’t think I have a notp for him?? At least, not one that I can think of off of the top of my head. 

best quote(s):

“If I could win a lady at leapfrog or by vaulting into my saddle with my armor on my back, under the correction of bragging be it spoken, I should quickly leap into a wife.” - Henry V; Henry V (5.2.) - conquer France that’s all fine, but get to conquering a woman’s heart? Now we’re stumped, we’re speaking in prose, we don’t know what the heck is going on. She doesn’t know what the heck is going on and if only she could understand me! Ahhhh you didn’t think this through, did you Hal? 

“Shall not thou and I, between Saint Denis and Saint George, compound a boy, half French, half English, that shall go to Constantinople and take the Turk by the beard? Shall we not?” - Henry V; Henry V (5.2.) - one of the many reasons why I think Henry VI would make a wonderfully heartbreaking Chorus to this play, especially if you’re going to stage the histories in a marathon. This moment is so pure, there is so much hope in this statement. Not only hope for these lovers, but for these two countries, and how quickly it is all lost is just absolutely heartbreaking. But at that point, you see that Henry VI, our Chorus, is that boy. Though he and Constantinople fell in the same year, and how much guilt lies on him then would be utterly, and uncomfortably palpable. 

“Francis!” x 15 - Hal; Henry IV, Part I (2.4.) - this was the scene that made me fall in love with the histories. 

head canon:

Hal Lives AU because I’ve been hyping it this whole post 

(Also possibly modern AU too - when his son gets into a highly prestigious university, Hal is probably more excited than Catherine is. They’re both proud as heck of course, that’s their boy, but Catherine was totally expecting it. And of course, Henry is a shy bean about it.) 

HENRY VI  

do I like them:

I LOVE him ahhh protect this darling boy 

5 good qualities:

wicked intelligent, sweet, just needs the people he loves, modest, honest (I could go on…) 

3 bad qualities:

anxious (just like his dad - but it’s like ten times worse), sometimes sacrificial of others for his own self-preservation, doesn’t always think through the consequences of his actions 

favourite episode/etc:

Henry VI, Part II is my favorite play of the H6 cycle, but like I adore him in everything he’s in. (Except TV shows that are really Yorkist centric… cough, cough The White Queen hehehe) 

otp:

Henry VI x Margaret of Anjou (otp: fit for none but for a king) - again, can you imagine how powerful these two would be in a modern AU?? I get chills just thinking about it. All Henry really needs is Margaret, Edward, some of his favorite books, and some animals to take care of and he is 100% content and at peace. And Margaret (especially in the modern AU) totally knows that. Ugh just… I love them so much. 

brotp:

Henry VI x Humphrey of Gloucester - just let these two be happy please ahhh 

(also poor darling boy he needs more human friends >-

ot3:

Henry VI x Margaret of Anjou x Edward of Westminster (aka my favorite family ever. This little family will always and forever end me. I adore the AU where nothing bad happens to Henry and he and his family just live happily ever after because it’s what they deserve.) 

notp:

Again, I don’t think I have one? Maybe like Henry VI x Richard III because bad things happened, but also like give me an AU where these two become friends and Henry is like, ‘no Richard, killing is not the answer’ >-

best quote:

“Whether it be through force of your report,My noble Lord of Suffolk, or for thatMy tender youth was never yet attaintWith any passion of inflaming love,I cannot tell; but this I am assured,I feel such sharp dissension in my breast,Such fierce alarums both of hope and fear,As I am sick with working of my thoughts.” - Henry VI; Henry VI, Part I (5.5.) 

This for me is actually such a gorgeous passage and if you ask any of my irl friends it’s my entire personality (especially those last three lines). Whenever my friends and I are like ‘tag urself’ with a TV show or play or anything really, I’m always the precocious, anxious one who thinks too much for his own good and most importantly, is trying his absolute best (and it’s usually a guy - which I find interesting). I got told just last week by two different people in my playwriting class that they wanted to “spend an hour in my brain” and like big yike >-

head canon:

(modern Plantagenet AU) 

Coffee makes Henry wayy too jittery, so he doesn’t drink it (there was that one time, and mistakes were made), but Margaret loves coffee, so Henry spends an insane amount of time learning how she likes her coffee, but also just learns an insane amount of coffee knowledge in general this boy could probably write a book. 

[typicalmidnight]

iron man 2 running commentary

okay so watching iron man 2 for the first time and i have a feeling im gonna have lots of commentary to share so it will all be under the cut! i’m gonna keep updating it as i watch!

*starts watching iron man 2 without watching iron man first cause it’s not on netflix and is only 2 minutes in but completely confused*

*questions my intelligence because i was able to understand the other marvel movies without watching other ones first*

*wonders if somehow i haven’t seen enough tony stark on tumblr to understand but i’ve somehow seen enough of other things to understand other movies*

*cue suprised and upset anon* sorry anon!!

okay anon!! help me pls! is the guy in the very beginning of iron man 2 someone from the first movie, and if he is who is he?? or is he new in this movie? edit: nevermind i looked it up

omg the first scene we see iron man is so cooool i love it!

holy sh*t he just landed on a stage omggg *freaks out so much because WOW*

im not even 7 minutes in yet but WOW IM SHOOK

i litterally just watched that first scene of tony/iron man in awe the whole time

“the possibility of world peace” BAAAAAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAAAAAA there’s a whole lot in store for the world, and i can guarantee it wont be peaceful lol

the stark expo is year long?!?!!?!!??? wow....

oooh oooh oooh that’s happy!

tony with kids awww

OMG THATS PETER PARKER RIGHT

STAN LEEEE OMG AWWWW

wait what did tony do??

AHHHHH pepper!!

does tony like pepper yet?? are they dating??

god tony. his sense of humor omg.

pepper isnt impressed lol

tony is so savage we stan a queen lol

you’re right, it isn’t canada cause we’re AWESOME and dont have ppl trying to get rid of iron man

rhodey!! i know who that is!

litterally everything tony says is amazing

oooooh whats tony up to?...

world peace? dream on tony

did he just say f**k you to tony stark? UM NO YOU DID NOT

oof the scenes with this bad dude are boring

wait i take that back HE JUST CUT A TV IN HALF!!

“wake up, daddy’s home” god i love tony

i think im getting too excited about everything lolll

tony insulting that robot arm thing gives me life

whats that thing in tony’s chest?? im guessing it has something to do with him being iron man and was part of the first movie

im confused about the relationship between pepper and tony

oooh shes ceo congrats to her!!

is this actually good tho?? the look on her face isnt great

oh okay its good she was just suprised

are those like fake documents or something?

OMG ITS NATASHA!!! AHHHHHHHH I LOVE HER SO MUCH SHE’S LIKE MY FAVE MCU WOMAN OTHER THAN MJ

i got way too excited there and hit my wrist on my wall and now it hurts

wait he doesn’t know nat yet??? HOW?!

also ummm natalie rushman?? that name kinda suits her?? ish idk

NATASHA IS A QUEEEEEEN!!!! I STANNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i also got so excited about nat that my eyes started to water

“i want one” okay tony nat could knock you out in a second and she for sure doesn’t need a man! also PEPPER!!!!!! LIKE WHAT ABOUT HER!

its the grand prix! it looks just like it does in cars 2!! lollll i was super shooketh about that when i made the connection

OMG ITS NAT AGAIN YAY!

WAIT is tony gonna drive that race car??? is he gonna race??? OMG i hope he does

also my wrist still hurts

wait pepper is suprised?? tony you didnt tell pepper? TONY YOU DIDNT TELL PEPPER??? TONY COME ONNNNNN

OMG TONY WHY PEPPER IS CONCERNED NOW

also is nat working for tony or something

oof its 12 am i should sleep i have school tmrw

haha bish that reporter lady left cause ur boring and nobody cares about you

AHHHH TONY’S GONNA RACEEEE

omg tony is racing tony is racing TONY IS RACING TONY IS RACING!!!! TONY PLS DONT DIE OR SOMETHING

hello my name is leea and i’m a huge drama queen that loves and cares so much about tony stark

OMG ITS THE VILLAIN GUY ACKKK TONY IS GONNA DIE

im still super dramatic lol

and also 100% convinced tony is gonna die even tho i know that wont happen

IM GETTING SO MUCH ANXIETY FROM JUST WATCHING THIS AHHHH

THE VILLAN GUY IS GOING SOMEWHERE ONTO THE TRACK OR SOMETHING ACKKKK

i hit my elbow and my head (not too hard dont worry) and the elbow is the same arm that i hurt my wrist so now my arm hurts from my elbow to my hand

WHAT IS THAT GUY DOING HE JUST WALKED ONTO THE RACE CAR TRACK

i litterally pressed play and then pressed pause two seconds later ooooof

peppers face omg she is shooketh lol

WTF IS HE DOING??!!!!!! also wth is he wearing on his chest?

OOOOOOOOOMG he has his slicy electricity weapon thingies TONY IS GONNA DIE AHHHH

HE JUST HIT A CAR OMG I HOPE THE PERSON IS OKAY

^big example of me being a drama queen and innocent and sweet at the same time

HAPPY HAS WHAT IM ASSUMING TO BE IRON MAN SOMETHING

TONY IS ABOUT TO DIE!!!

i paused it right before he hits the car omg the suspense!!!!!

ANXIETY LEVELS RIGHT NOW

OMG TONY NOOOOOOOO

IM BREATHING SO DEEP AND FAST RIGHT NOW IM PANICKING FOR TONY (it’s called hyperventalating. future me remembered the word lol)

dude WHYYY would you take off your helmet??!!!!

there is a dude coming to kill you and i think a helmet would help protect you idiot!!

OMG THERES A CAR COMING AT THE VILLAIN GUY

WHAT IF IT HITS HIM AND THEN HITS TONY

THEY JUST EXPLODED OMG

i just choked because i was like WHAT JUST HAPPENED

there are cars exploding behind him and this dude just doesnt care!!

why have i started saying dude?

owww my wrist hurts

typing hurts

owwww

its actually really not that bad im dramatic

is pepper gonna save tony????

does the case have the rescue armor ive read about?????

HE JUST TRIED TO KILL TONY

*facepalms* tony WHY did you just hit him on the head with whatever that was??? what did you think it would accomplish??????? this dude just sliced your car in half and tried to kill you, do you think you can take him out by hitting him on the head??? just get tf out of there!!!

OMG HES GONNA KILL TONY

i just hit my head again (not hard it fine)

OMG DID HE JUST HIT TONY

I THINK HE JUST HIT TONY

IM NOT OKAY

AND I DONT THINK HE IS EITHER

AHHHHHHHHHHH

okay i’m going to bed cause its almost 1 am and i have school. anyway, this is the 100th comment which is kinda good to leave off at! i’ll finish watching tmrw and keep posting!

okay i’m back! about to start watching the movie!

ahhhhhh poor tony!!! i’m only a few seconds in but already panicking for him!!

omg hes getting ready to kill tony!! and tony is just lying on the ground!!!

pepper and happy come save him! ! ! ! ! !!!!!!!

or nat!!!!

ahhhhhhhhh tonys gonna die!!!!!!!!!!!!!

with every second i freak out moreeeee

oh thank GOD tony moved!!!

that car just exploded omg tony almost diedddd!!!

AHHHHH TONY IS ON FIRE

how tf is he so calm!!!!????!?!?!?!?!?

i mean hes not that calm but way calmer than any normal human should be in this situation

is he just like used to people trying to kill him??

OMG thats soo saaaaaaaddddd

OKAY HERE COMES PEPPER AND HAPPY

please run over him!!!

OMG THEY ALMOST HIT TONY

but they hit the bad guy yay!!!

awww tony is bleeding!

well i mean thats kinda expected lol

oof tony is mad

OMG PEPPER IS SO PISSED

shes acting like a mom lol

OMG THE GUYS WEAPONS ARE POWERING ON

THEY’RE ALL GONNA DIE

TONY JUST GET IN THE CAR

OMG THE DOOR

TONY GET IN THE CAR AND HAPPY GET TF OUT OF THERE!!!!

tony just GET IN THE CAR

OMG THE AIR BAG

HE JUST CUT THE WINDOW

THIS SCENE IS SO INTENSE OMG

okay pepper i love you but JUST GIVE TONY THE CASE

tony your armor is taking WAY TOO LONG to get on!!!

AHHHHH LOOK AT THE ARMOR!!!!!

ITS SO OLD

like not old

but compared to his current suit

the “it’s nanotech. you like it?” one

its nothing

AHHH HE HIT TONYS ARM

AHHHH TONYS GONNA DIE

AHHHH PEPPER IS SCREAMING

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

#drama queen much? #yes thats me

AHHH COME ON TONY

love how i’ve only gotten 3 more minutes into the movie and i’m already at 47 comments

OMG HE JUST WHIPPED TONY TO THE GROUND

omg poor tony!!!!

can everyone just leave my dad alone PLEASE

YAY TONY!! NOW THE BAD GUY IS ON THE GROUND!!!

oh thank god tony is okay hes not dead he won for now

eww he just spat out a bunch of blood

“you loose” how??? like what???

ooooooooooh wait no is tony gonna get in trouble.......

i forgot to say this yesterday but this whole scene with the guy on the track and stuff and the exploding cars in kinda similar to cars 2

i guess you cant have a racing scene in a movie without a car exploding tho

what is up with that guy with glasses?? like hes weird i dont trust him

why arent there subtitles translating whatever language they are speaking in (french? idk)

ya its french

ofc tony talks about the technology lol

and critcizes the bad guy’s

tony this guy tried to kill you WHY are you sitting down next to him??!!?

that guy is weird and kinda creepy

okay just f off senator dude nobody likes you, your opinion isnt valid, and i wanna punch you

“these suits exist now”????? wtf b*tch no they dont!

wait what ever happened to nat??

pepper is really responsible shes great i love her

what does that note say???

omg is that a bomb or something??!

why do guards always help prisoners escape like seriously

is that guy gonna take his place or something??

also he kinda looks like haymitch from hunger games

omg wait WTF WAS THAT

ALSO GUARD WHAT THE HELL

i was right! it was a bomb!

why did they throw him in a truck??

omg why are they in an airport?!

are they gonna help him escape??!!

why is there a table and people....

is that glasses guy sitting at the table?

i was right it is glasses guy!

i didn’t trust him from the start

why is he helping him tho...

friend? fan? what is going on?!!!???

YAYYYYY theres nat!!!

“erratic behaviour”??? what are you talking about???? he just saved himself from being killed how is that erratic?????!!

awwww poor tony

i beleive in you tony, and i love you, but no honey, you don’t know exactly what you’re doing you need help!

“software sh*t” aaaaaaaaaaahahahahhaahhaaaaa

make iron man look like an antique? ya no way is that gonna happen

is nat his assistant or something im a bit confused

aww tony is like so depressed i feel so bad for him!!

stannnnn nat

back on watch? what does that mean...

omg tony is so drunkkkkkk nooooo

ohhhhh tonyyyyy noooo come onnnn

you’re so drunk dude stopppp

god tony you’re so drunk pleaseee

wait why is rhodey fighting him anyway?

wow this is my 101 comment today and i’ve only watched 20 mins today

omggggg people are recordingggg this isn’t gonna end well

*sighs* oh god tony dont yell at them whyyyyy

omg tonys in the fire place!!!

omg that just happened. they just fired at each other.

also just saying tony, he does have what it takes to be war machine cause he continues to be...

ohhhh is tony okay??

im confused tho why did they start fighting in the first place?

okay i just looked it up, it was because he was being irresponsible and drunk, and putting people at the party in danger, and he wouldnt stop

ngl its getting kinda tiring to keep updating this but i’m gonna keep going cause i want this record for myself, and i’m not gonna quit something

ok i’m gonna continue the movie tmrw cause its prob gonna be a snow day (lol i left off at 111)

[realtalk-princeton]

To Maybach -- Anon 2023 again. Honestly, my other major option is Brown (and Penn, but that's out by now) and I'm concerned that I'd be sacrificing happiness if I choose Pton. "Happy" is a part of the Brown brand, whereas "ahhhhh" seems to be a part of Pton's. I want the name and the opportunities Pton would afford me. I suppose that's not a question, but how would you respond? Do you understand what I mean? Is it so awful to pick Pton 4 name/opportunity (in addition to the other stuff)

Sorry for the delay everyone, I just got caught up in a lot of obligations. Due to multiple popular demands from both pre-frosh and current students, I decided to structure my Brown and Princeton story in the following manner. In the first section, I’ll give my background context prior to starting college and my feelings throughout the years on the subject. In the second section, I’ll specifically address the above question in more detail with my many thoughts on key distinctions between the two schools. I think the combination will serve the purposes of everyone quite nicely. Lastly, if any pre-frosh ever want to talk to me, feel free to reach out and ask for my contact information. Or even better yet lol, I just remembered that PREVIEW started, so I guess it might be easier to just talk in person to me. I actually don’t even have class tomorrow haha. I just think that talking is sometimes easier than writing and also in these responses sometimes I have to speculate. For example, I can pretty safely state that if a pre-frosh is almost certain of being a pre-med, Brown is probably going to be a much less stressful experience, but I have no idea if this applies to you beforehand.

So anyway, even though it was four years ago, I still remember it like it was yesterday. Boy time flies. I was not the most studios or stand-out HS student. I wasn’t the valedictorian or salutatorian of a rather small school far away from major cities. While some Princetonian HS students spent summer doing lab research at universities, I spent mine goofing off with friends and traveling. We used to actually have a bonfire at the end of the school year and burned stacks of our HW up to 4 feet high lol. When it came to applying to college, I did not actually even again acceptance to NYU or BC lol even though my stats were more than up to par. I guess maybe they were concerned that I wouldn’t be a very hard-working student. Luckily, I am very fortunate that despite coming from an extremely educated family (grandfather and mom went to Columbia, Dad went to Berkeley, etc.), my parents never put that much pressure on me. So as you can imagine, I was super excited when I heard that I got into Princeton, Brown, Cornell, and some other schools. For a period of time, I was actually getting ready to go to Brown. My SO at the time had committed to URI and I was psyched by the super expressive culture of Brown. Students prided themselves on being true to themselves and also took full advantage of freedom with responsibility. The location was close enough to NYC and some kids from my HS were already there. I always hated excessive structure and authority growing up and the prospect of 70%’s A’s granted, no +/I’s, and pass/failing anything was totally alluring! On a side note, I always laugh when they say that people don’t abuse pass/fail and use it only like 10-15% of the time. Well, maybe that’s because they’re already handing out A’s like it’s water and all A-’s become A’s haha. But anyway, I was psyched. Who wouldn’t want to live at camp Brown and take it easier than HS, but still be guaranteed a legit degree on your resume? However, after I visited Princeton, connected with a large number of alumni, and actually started putting real thought into my education, my perspectives slowly, but surely started to change. I think what I really underestimated was the power of the Princeton degree and how impressive our alumni network truly is. The people I met and still meet to this day are absolutely brilliant in several respects (e.g. they aren’t just nerds in one subject) and many are focused on maximizing their impact and allocation of influence in this world. The alumni donation rate is nothing short of incredible and the chance to be part of this network was alluring. I remember meeting a guy actually who got waitlisted and was already attending Duke when he got the chance to go to Princeton. He lived every moment to the fullest with his academic pursuits, the social network of brilliant, but diverse persons, and solid career plans. Anyway, it just became more clear to me over time that while Princeton was rigorous, it’s academic qualities could be much more intimate and engaged than Brown and the intellectual horsepower of its students (mostly) created truly incredible and impactful people. Jeez lol I forget sometimes how many alumni we have on the SC, in politics, business, arts, etc. At Brown, all they do is gush over Emma Watson in an almost cult-like way (sarcasm). But anyway, I was getting pushed as you can imagine, but I was still worried as I wasn’t the best HS student and grade deflation had literally only ended the year before. But eventually, the offer was just too good to pass up. Once you become a Princeton student, your life truly does change and people will treat you give you credit solely based on this fact (whether it’s right or wrong is another story). I remember before I even committed, I was hanging out at the Princeton Club in New York and a few days later some of the guys (who literally knew me for like a few days), invited me out and basically paid of lunch at Smith and Wollensky and lauded me on my “accomplishments” lol and how they could always be resources to bolster a Princetonian. Pretty soon after I committed.

As for answering your specific question, I’m already seeing red flags. Whenever you choose a school for the name, that’s setting yourself up for a bad time. Yes, our opportunities are better. Look at the difference in endowments lol. It’s like that for a reason even though they have way more students and more grad schools. It’s also reflected as well in our post-graduation salary averages. Brown is more creative with RISD and it’s curriculum, but that doesn’t always equal more opportunities. Princeton has the most power and resources of any university on a per-student basis and gives us an incredibly powerful brand and network. That said, you should probably explore why you want to go to Princeton other than the name and brand. One of the miserable people I know picked Princeton over another school because it was the “Best” school she got into and that’s just not fun when you didn’t research enough beforehand. By contrast, I know someone who turned down Harvard for a small liberal arts school in the middle of nowhere and she had an amazing time. If you feel like and click with Brown’s social scene, that’s another reason for not going to Princeton. Academically, Princeton is better for people who want rigor and want to truly maximize their learning in a short period of time and be around amazing minds. Our depth is much better than Brown’s and it shows with how strong our students are in critical thinking skills both inside and outside of their majors. However, there is a downside to this. For example, if you want to major in physics at Princeton, you better adapt fast or be damn good at it. You can’t just “love” physics and be relatively bad at it (compared to your peers) to succeed here because we teach you to be the best students possible from professors who literally wrote your book. At Brown, sure you don’t learn as much or go as deep, but you can major in almost anything because you just aren’t held to the same standards. So there’s a tradeoff. If I majored in Brown’s business program, let me just say that I would not NEARLY be perceived by others to be so intelligent (even though I’m not lol). I know the kids in the degree, it’s not like they are dumb, but jeez lol is it a joke a bunch of the time. Relating sociology to business for example on the surface can seem like a good idea that teaches people until you actually see what they’re writing and working on. I would probably have a 4.0 without working as hard too. And I don’t mean this to mean I’m like super smart or anything. It’s just not comparable to Princeton. However, I am super blessed and thankful that I did take Economics here seriously. The kinds of critical thinking skills and the ability to analytically dissect complex multi-faceted problems that I have developed serve me very well and I feel so rewarded. I literally got a position at a hedge fund with no experience at all because the interviewer liked how I wrote a research paper on guns an applied rigorous statistical analysis in many novel ways to answer new questions. This is no different in many ways than using public information using novel techniques to find value where nobody else sees it. But overall, I think that I’m feeling Brown for you unless you are willing to work harder here for greater depth of learning. I just want to say too though that despite me working hard, I still don’t pull-allnighters almost ever and I still have achieved very high grades. You don’t have to be a genius to do well here. Take it from me. I had piss-poor test scores (by Princeton standards) and was not a valedictorian, but if you are strategic and work reasonably hard and are disciplined, the work is more than doable. I don’t want to brag because I think it promotes bad culture, but you ought to know that a student like me can succeed academically and perform at the top of their class without working in the library all the time. So you should really evaluate what kind of learning experience you want and where you will be most likely to be happy and healthy. Some people just want a break after HS and don’t care about going super deep into their learning development. That’s totally fine, but then Brown is probably better (assuming you also like the culture). Some people would really abuse Brown’s system, not really learn, develop unhealthy and bad habits, and be kind of bored. In that case, Princeton is better. It really depends on you, but if all you see here for you is a name, you’re probably shooting yourself in the foot coming here.

Anyway hope that all helps. I can answer specifics if you have them too.

Edit. also I realized how long this all is and noticed that maybe some of you should just call me or I can connect you with people I know who love Brown lol. It’s sometimes harder to write these things and express everything properly compared to like a 30-minute dinner conservasation. Just putting it out there. I’m also exhausted lol from staying up until 4am the past few nights for this huge deal coming up. I did this tonight so that I wouldn’t mess up my sleep schedule any further and avoid taking a nap lol.

[holocenerpg]

Congratulations, MEGAN, you have been accepted for LORCAN SCAMANDER with the face claim of BOOBOO STEWART! It’s so rare that both of the Scamander twins are taken in a roleplay, sadly, and not only am I so happy to have them both here, I’m honestly so excited to see more of Lorcan and Lysander’s dynamic on the dash! From what you’ve mentioned in their app about the twins complementing each other so wonderfully, I can already tell that I’ll be in love with the family dynamic. Moreover, your interpretation of Lorcan is so unique. I hardly ever see a Slytherin Scamander, much less one who’s always a werewolf. I can’t wait to see more of Lorcan! Welcome to HOLOCENE, we’re so excited to have you here! Your requests for LORCAN to be a SLYTHERIN PREFECT and a SLYTHERIN BEATER have been accepted. Please send in your account to the main by twenty-four hours or send us a message if you need more time. Make sure that your theme is accessible and that your characters’ name, house, gender, year, and pronouns are stated somewhere in the description. Remember that your second character can be on a sideblog if you’d like, but we do not allow MUMU blogs.

Congratulations, JINX, you have been accepted for RILEY GOLDSTEIN with the face claim of MARGARET QUALLEY! As someone who is Jewish, I always love seeing Jewish characters, and honestly I can already tell you’ve put so much more thought into the Goldstein family than JK Rowling ever did. I loved reading all of the little details in her biography because it really fleshed-out her character, and your second headcanon about how she and her mother reconnected with their Jewish heritage after so long really touched me. I’m so excited to see more of the Goldstein/Kowalski family on the dash! Welcome to HOLOCENE, we’re so excited to have you here! Please send in your account to the main by twenty-four hours or send us a message if you need more time. Make sure that your theme is accessible and that your characters’ name, house, gender, year, and pronouns are stated somewhere in the description. Remember that your second character can be on a sideblog if you’d like, but we do not allow MUMU blogs.

Congratulations, EL, you have been accepted for SAHAR KOWALSKI with the face claim of ODEYA RUSH! El, we completely love her. It’s so cool to have an exchange student here at Hogwarts this year —- we have a few transfers from various schools (including one from Ilvermorny) and we’re excited to explore exchanges! I adored her relationship with intelligence & intellectualism, and how she just can’t quite manage it, no matter how hard she tries. It was great hearing about her life in NYC and I’m super excited to see her start Quodpot club —- and, of course, how she slots in with all the students here. Welcome to HOLOCENE, we’re so excited to have you here! Your request for SAHAR to be SLYTHERIN RESERVE CHASER has been accepted. Please send in your account to the main by twenty-four hours or send us a message if you need more time. Make sure that your theme is accessible and that your characters’ name, house, gender, year, and pronouns are stated somewhere in the description. Remember that your second character can be on a sideblog if you’d like, but we do not allow MUMU blogs. (Sahar will be filling Lily Potter’s girl gang connection. This connection is now closed with this acceptance until further notice.)

Congratulations, KAY, you have been accepted for SOFIA KRUM with the face claim of MAISIE WILLIAMS! Ahhhhh! Sofia is absolutely adorable and we, in turn, adore her. I love how different she is from Evgenia and yet how much her love for her sibling shines through —- as it does with her whole family, really. I’m always excited to see more Hufflepuffs around, and I think Sofia will be an excellent addition to this current cohort of Fifth Years. We can’t wait to see this absent-minded, loyal girl in action! Welcome to HOLOCENE, we’re so excited to have you here! Please send in your account to the main by twenty-four hours or send us a message if you need more time. Make sure that your theme is accessible and that your characters’ name, house, gender, year, and pronouns are stated somewhere in the description. Remember that your second character can be on a sideblog if you’d like, but we do not allow MUMU blogs. (Sofia will be filling Evgenia Krum’s younger sibling wanted connection and Lily Potter’s girl gang connection. That connection is closed with this acceptance until further notice.)

[purplesurveys]

324

What are you excited for? I have a two-week break before I start midyear classes and I’m just ecstatic at the thought of finally not having any deadlines for the time being and sleeping in when I want. I enrolled for midyear though because my depression hits me the hardest during the summer, so I wanted to do something that would keep me occupied all throughout. What is your name? How nice of you to ask. I’m Robyn. Who was the last person to talk to you? Well Audrey tweeted me and that was the most recent time someone talked to me. I dunno if that counts. Are you part Irish? I am 0% Irish.  What was your last facebook status? I never post statuses on Facebook. If I do post anything it’s always a profile photo change to promote my org.

Do you find musicians or athletes more attractive? I don’t have a preference. What is your favourite colour? Pastel pink or black. Do you email often? Very often for school matters, yes. Rarely for anything else. How was your night last night? It was pretty cool! I hung out at Gab’s dorm from afternoon to evening so I could help her with 90 packages that she had to assemble, and watched BuzzFeed’s Worth It while doing that. Then we caught the Friends finale on her TV so I made her watch it and she loved it ahhhhh after that we just kind of went from channel to channel because there was nothing to watch. At around 9 PM she watched this show she’s currently following while I took a nap. All in all, solid glimpse as to how our home life would be. If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? I’d love to meet my maternal great-grandfather. He was a very respected and intelligent man. The only trace of him I see today is at our old house, where his library of law books and encyclopedias still exists. Do you own any action figures? I own wrestling figures.  Do you like reading? I used to go with one book every two weeks when I was younger. Since then school just kind of took all my time and I never got back to the hobby anymore. What's your favourite thing about your hometown? It’s in between the city and the mountains. It’s easier to get to either when you’re in between. What did you do over Christmas? I don’t remember...I also get hugely depressed over the Christmas season so I don’t make memories from it. When I was younger I wanted to be a: Firefighter. Do you have a lucky number? No, I don’t pick lucky anythings. How many vowels has your whole name got in it? Nine all in all. The last thing you downloaded onto your computer? A PowerPoint presentation that I needed to study for my broadcasting finals. Do you like cats? I like all animals but I have very little patience and enjoyment with cats. Do you have an iPod? Yeah from like a decade ago. I still have it, just as an artifact now haha. Are you wearing jeans? No I HATE jeans. I had an unplanned sleepover at a friend’s last Thursday and I had been wearing jeans, which meant I had to wear them for two days straight. In hot. Humid. Weather. It was torture and I’m never doing that again. Do you prefer nighttime or daytime? Nighttime. Have you got any piercings? Yes, my mom got my ears pierced as an infant. I’ve since damaged one of my piercings though. Is the window in your room open? A couple of them are always open in the summer. Do you own a gun? No. Do you chew on ice cubes? Not really, no. Do you hold grudges easily? Yes. I find it satisfying. Do you play any instruments? The recorder, I guess. Super lame. Have you ever thrown a surprise birthday party? I’ve participated in numerous surprise parties, but very seldom have I directly planned one myself. If you celebrate Christmas, do you get a real tree or an artificial tree? Everyone here in the Philippines gets artificial ones, so it was incredibly weird to me when I found out other cultures get real, actual trees. What's the last thing you watched? Brooklyn Nine-Nine. What websites do you go on more than others? Twitter. What is the hardest decision that you have ever had to make? Accepting that my first relationship with Gab was no more. I had been hanging on to it in the hopes that we get to mend it, but we were on different pages at the time and it was a hard pill to swallow, especially knowing that I exerted a lot of effort into trying to make it work.

Another one that I have in mind wasn’t exactly a hard decision to make per se, but answering university application forms and filling which courses I plan to take was a bold step for me and really solidified that I was going to be on my own from that time on. Private Catholic schools babysit you for 14 years, so filing out each form was a big achievement for me every time. How long ago did you take your last survey? Like 9-10 hours ago, I dunno. This morning. Have you ever been told you were a good writer? I get that a lot, mainly because that is my forte. What do you want to be when you're older? Financially stable. What colour car do your parents drive? We have two white cars and another that is blue. The latter drives me nuts, as I’ve always thought an all-white lineup looks so much nicer. Are you shy? Yep. Do you change depending on who you're with? No not really; the only difference shows when I talk to people I personally dislike. Have you ever liked someone and they were taken? I haven’t. Do you own a camera? If so, do you use it often? I’ve since given away my DSLR to my sister so no, I don’t use it anymore. My only camera is on my phone and I use that a lot instead. What's your biggest wish right now? I wish I could be guaranteed a happy and secure life in a couple of years. Do you believe in fate? Not really. Does it take a lot to make you cry? Nope. Do you have a Twitter? I do. Do you often find yourself eating just because you're bored? Ahahaha you got me. I make trips to the fridge every time there’s nothing to do. What are your worst habits? I have trichotillomania, so hair-pulling is a big aspect of my life and one that drives me nearly crazy. Would you rather be alone or in the company of other people? Depends on my mood. I love my own company, but my friends are my family. When was the last time you flew on a plane? Last month. Do you watch music videos? Not really. Do you ever wish you were someone else? I always wish I was richer, but I’ve never thought about being a particular person. Do you know much about your family tree? A fair amount. What is your favorite home-cooked meal? My maternal grandmother’s kare-kare and paternal grandmother’s crabs. Do you own an account on club penguin? LOL Do you like lemonade? No. Is there someone who means a lot to you but they don't know that? A lot of my friends probably think that because I’m shy most of the time and don’t really express my feelings. But like I said, friends are my established family and I’d take a bullet for anyone I take into my circle. Who are you currently talking to? Just this survey. Is money important to you? Extremely. What are you afraid of? This is always a super broad question. Uh flying cockroaches? First person to come to your mind: The first being I thought of was my dog honestly. But since Cindy tweeted me like 30 seconds ago and the notification popped up, I remembered her first. Who was the last person to call you? My girlfriend. Is there someone you trust more than others? Yes, see above.

[strangeremembrances]

Is the film as good as the book Megan? 🙏

WORLDS COLLIDE! Hannah! 

Oh god, this is a question. I have a free evening so you’re getting my full attention and I’m always in the mood to talk CMBYN and unleash my ridiculous love so here goes!

First off, I will try not to be spoilery…. BUT THIS IS HUGE AND I HAVE OFFICIALLY GONE INTO HEART EYES MODE BUT HERE IS MY OVERVIEW.

I have loved the novel for so many years that it holds such a special and important significant for me so that’s difficult to compare anything to. I was 19 when I first read the novel and I’m nearly 29 now so that’s nearly 10 years of adoration….

That’s why I was terribly nervous when I heard they were making a movie. That kind of changed when I saw Armie’s instagram wayyyyyyyy back when in January 2017 around the same time as Sundance and he tagged it #billowyblueshirt - I pretty much lost my mind!!! I mean, THAT IS OLIVER. That’s how I pictured him  (minus baby Harper of course!). He was a little younger looking in my head but Armie looked SO MUCH like the Oliver in my mind.

And then this came out:

I was so stunned because I didn’t really know much about Timmy. I recognised him from Homeland but that was it and yet, he looked like Elio. Again - I had the same response! He looked like the Elio I’d imagined in my head and that tiny clip made me so excited. It still didn’t stop me from being nervous as you can’t get much from a little clip but by the time the main trailer came out, I was BEYOND excited because so much of what I’d imagined was in front of me and so close to how I’d always pictured in my mind. Plus, the shots were so pretty and almost art house that it didn’t feel like they’d cheapened it or gone for the obvious adaption they so easily could have. 

The trailer I first saw was this one:

I swear to you, the moment I saw the part where Elio says “listen, when the time comes, this is how he’ll say goodbye to us…Later”, I stopped being nervous. Completely. That scene still kills me.

I desperately tried to get tickets to the BFI screenings but they sold out so I could only see the movie opening night in the UK on 27 October but it was one of my favourite and one of the most memorable cinema experiences I’ve ever had, second to possibly seeing Titanic when I was a kid.

Yes, there are parts of the book that I wish were in there that sadly didn’t make the cut. I made a post about that ages ago. I have a tag on here that has all my ramblings under (HERE!) but I think I talked about that. 

Does it have some flaws? Of course! There are a few editing moments that I thin would make non-novel readers unsure and some of the dialogue remains unexplained… unlike in the novel but I do wonder whether some of that is by choice to allow the viewers the ability to make up their own mind. I am definitely able to cast a critical eye but I am so fond of the movie as a whole and a novel!fan that I can’t help but be overly descriptive and gushy haha. It’s a marmite kind of thing for many and none of the characters are perfect in the book or movie but that’s what I love. They just happen to be fascinating and interesting to me.

SO NOW FOR THE RAMBLING……

The movie is different from the novel. There is about 1/3 of the novel in the movie. The entirety of Ghost Spots is gone. Most of San Clemente Syndrome is also gone. But yet the movie doesn’t suffer because of it. Luca has talked endlessly (and oh god i have wanted every single interview he’s done for this movie, I’m sure. I’m sure an admirer) about his decisions for the movie and one of the big ones is that he wanted the audience to grow with Elio. He didn’t want the novel’s reflective nature or the Proustian thing clouding the audience’s judgement of what was happening. He didn’t want voice overs or a narrator and, in my view, it is HANDS DOWN the best thing he did. You experience EVERY SINGLE MOMENT with Elio. From start to finish, you’re with him during his summer and you disappear. The movie is so immersive and beautiful for that, I’m so grateful to him. 

PLEASE GO SEE THE MOVIE IN A CINEMA. That’s the best advice I can give. I hope it’s showing in the UK still where you are. Just take that time out and go see it. I can’t tell you how wonderful it is. From the second the credits start (and i swear, they’re some iconic bloody credits. The second I hear Hallelujah Junction *goosebumps*) it’s just the kind of movie that lifts you out of your life, drops you into Italy in the Summer and you spend every moment experiencing every second with these characters.

As for the comparison of the characters in the novel to those on screen. THIS IS WHERE I GET EMOTIONAL. Elio. Oh Elio Perlman is my sweetheart. The first time I read the book, I got him. He taught me so much about being brave. But novel!Elio is DRAMATIC as I’m sure you’re aware if you’ve read the book. He is hormonal and ridiculous and weird as hell. He’s so OTT and it the world’s most unreliable narrator so to play THAT right is just the most difficult task and it was what I was most frightened of. Let me tell you…. everything, EVERYTHING, that critics said about Timmy’s acting and his portrayal of Elio is spot on. It is one of my favourite piece of acting I’ve ever had the pleasure of witnessing. All of those Elio thoughts and feelings in the novel, all the internalisation and the intense thoughts he has… getting that across is a TASK and you read them all on Timmy’s face. I can’t even list them. It’s every damn scene. Moments of note are the dinner table scene where Oliver doesn’t show up. I even made a post of this because it stunned me to much (HERE!). The scene in Mr P’s office when Oliver’s showing off about his apricot knowledge and novel readers know that Elio is already enamoured and thinking filthy thoughts…. it’s ALL THERE on Timmy’s face. I could go on and on and on about him and how he quite frankly blew my mind but the main thing I keep coming back to is that movie!Elio is a JOY. He is an absolute delight to behold. Novel!Elio is so intense and because you’re inside his mind, it’s difficult to see him the way the world does. Movie!Elio is so lovely. He’s every bit as intense and kind of difficult and bold and hormonal as novel!Elio but he’s also light and fun and playful and SWEET. He’s EXTREMELY SWEET. There are some tiny little moments that are so effervescent and make me smile so much because Elio sparkles on screen. He dances and shimmies and lazes about, he touches everything in sight, he climbs Oliver like a tree, he smiles and argues and fusses and swoons and is just PERFECTION. I’m not going to go on and on because I’d spoil stuff…. the ending thought. The very final 2 seconds of the movie are forever etched into my brain. 

As for the movie itself. It’s blissful. The cinematography is breathtaking. You feel part of the home and the landscape and Luca’s heart is in every frame. It’s like a painting. The music is wonderful and fills every scene with nostalgia and this sense that the Perlman’s are effortlessly cultured. The editing AHHHHH. GOD. There are some editing choices that I could kiss Walter Fasano for. It has an arthouse feel (MY FAVOURITE), and is SO LONG. It’s a very long movie and that was the biggest treat. There are directorial choices that I want to cuddle Luca for, namely how certain scenes are framed - especially the nosebleed scene and the entire MIDNIGHT sequence. That sequence is long and drawn out but constructed with little details so beautifully.

The other characters are so RICH and I was devastated to let them go when the movie ended. Annella is so much more than in the novel and I adore her. Marzia is WONDERFUL. Mafalda is every bit as sassy and great as the novel even if her part is smaller. But the VP is Mr Perlman. Reading the novel, anyone will remember and feel moved by his speech to Elio about life and love and letting yourself experience life: good and bad. The movie version moves me to tears from start to finish, every single time I see it. Mr Perlman is a GIFT in this movie. Every single character was so real and warm and the family moments are some of my favourites from movie.

Finally, the chemistry. Everyone has chemistry with EVERYONE. Notably, Elio and his parents. The level of affection in this movie is off the charts. Everyone hugs and kisses and cuddles and touches and it’s the most refreshing thing. But obviously the chemistry everyone wants is between Oliver and Elio and it’s so natural and almost unstaged (especially the midnight scenes) that I was speechless. They are wonderful together. It’s so clear that Timmy and Armie became friends. They shot the movie chronologically and much of the way the movie developed and occurred was how Timmy and Armie met and became friends. Watch any interview… haha. They are special on screen together.

My absolute FAVOURITE thing though is how the movie is so thin on dialogue. Compared to most movies, it is sparce and treats the audience intelligently because so many of the BIG moments are simple and delivered through nuanced acting (specifically by Timmy and notable by Armie in the goodbye portion of the movie). There’s no exposition, very little emotional talk as it is SHOWN and that is hands down the reason this movie resonated with me so well because that’s what I wanted from an adaption of the book. I didn’t want Elio TELLING us, I wanted to see it. And you do. VERY WELL.

So yeah, ESSAY DONE. I could ramble on and on. I truly ADORE the movie. It is up there with my all time favourites and I said after seeing it for the first time, that gratitude is the overwhelming thing I felt when I walked out of the cinema and after I’d picked my broken heart up off the floor…. my feelings haven’t changed.

If Luca sticks by his intention on sequels to follow Elio’s life, well I’m on board. I’d have NEVER said that last year. I’d have never wanted anyone to touch the novel or expand on the novel for a second. But I trust Luca. I’m pretty much a bloody disciple at this point hahaha. I fell head over heels for these characters and I don’t want to never see them again - especially Elio. Once you’ve seen Timmy’s Elio, I’d defy anyone to NOT want more.

So, in summary. THE MOVIE IS MAGICAL. It is different from the novel in some areas, in some it brings to life the pivotal moments in the first portion of the novel and although it misses out some of my most cherished portions of the novel, in my view, the movies doesn’t suffer for it. I hold them both dear for different reasons and they compliment one another in the loveliest way!