#i’m off the rails rn ignore me

[osamucide]

on that note i wanna fuck him with cigarettes involved. i wanna smoke a cigarette while he eats me out. i want him to ash carelessly on the floor while he whines and moans as i blow him. i wanna lean up for him to put the filter between my lips after im done sucking him off. i want a cigarette dangling from between his teeth while he hits it from the back. i want him to hold my head down on the mattress and force me to take a drag. i want him to shotgun the smoke into my mouth in missionary before he keeps fucking me hard. i want the room cloudy. i wanna smell like tobacco and sweat when we’re finished. i want him to light up another one as i curl up exhausted into his side and i want him to hold it to my mouth while im drifting off and call me a good boy while i take a pull of it even half asleep. cigarettes are sexy argue with the wall

[genshin-obsessed]

When Someone Flirts with You! | Honkai Star Rail

Someone saw this coming and I'm very proud of you for figuring it out. Yeah, I've been getting into star rail and I thought I'd just write since I can't really think of genshin things to write right now lol this is barely edited, so have mercy <3 idk tags rn so please help me out :') ✧ Includes: Dan Heng, Welt, Sampo, Gepard, Jing Yuan, Luocha, Blade ✧ Extra: Luocha and Blade might be ooc, I'm not too familiar with them as of right now. ✧ Come one, come all! See what happens when someone flirts with you in front of your men!

Dan Heng

Dan Heng is a really private person, he’s not a fan of showing off everything. So he’s not one to flaunt you around, but it’s not hard to tell you’re both in a relationship. He’s around you like… all the time.

He’s not one to follow around like a helicopter boyfriend, but he’s got an eye on you. If he sees someone bothering you, he’s behind them in an instant.

0/10. Dan Heng’s not super scary so they could ignore him and continue flirting with you. For a moment, he’ll just stand there as he listens to some of the dumb things they’re gonna say. You two make fun of them later for it. But then he hears something along the lines of, “come on, i’ll treat you better.” he don’t like that. 

How is this creep better than him?! They couldn’t even tell you were uncomfortable. Dan Heng will usually place a hand on their shoulder and his grip gets tighter every second the creep is still in front of you. Paired with his glare…

10/10 the creep is gone. You sigh in relief and walk to Dan Heng quietly, wrapping your arms around his waist. He immediately hugs back, stroking your hair a little.

“Let’s go somewhere else. I don’t like it here anymore.” You agreed.

Welt

Well, he doesn’t hang around you 24/7, he’s a busy man. But it’s also not hard to tell you’re dating either. Welt isn’t crazy about PDA, but he’ll give you a quick kiss every now and then and often gives you hugs (per your request).

He believes you’re capable of taking care of yourself, so he’s often not paying attention. That doesn’t mean he won’t look over at you every now and then. This time, he just happened to see some creepy creep trying to creep up on you. 

“Are you ok, (y/n)?” Is the first thing he asks when he walks up to you. He will literally ignore the existence of the creep beside him. Usually what happens here is that you’ll nod and he’ll “accidentally” shove the creepy away and urge you to come talk with him and his friends. The creep is usually so confused they walk away. But sometimes- sometimes- they follow.

Welt does NOT like that. I mean it was one thing to not take the hint from your face, but then to stop you when you’re actively trying to leave?

Welt will turn around and just glare at them. Like that silent, “I will kill you” kinda glare. It’s a staring contest for a moment before the creepy creep just kinda turns away and leaves. Sometimes, Welt does have to smack them with his lil cane. Sometimes.

“Anyway, we’re over here. Would you like a drink?”

Sampo

Sampo is all over you, usually. He loves you and the world should know? Sometimes, he can go too far so just let him know. Anyway, since he’s always over you, people know you’re dating him.

Usually at parties and events, he’s hanging off your arm, but sometimes he’s gotta go talk to some of his other friends and acquaintances. He keeps an eye on you.

Here’s the thing, he’ll come up and flirt with you too but try to one up the creep. “You look fine, darling,” - the creep. “You look so beautiful, every star in the sky and the moons pale in comparison.” - Sampo.

0/10. Of course, the creep gets irritated and asks what the hell Sampo is doing. Sampo just gives him a condescending smile and says, “that’s my partner you’re talking to. I’m not gonna let you just creep up on them.” There’s… a glint in his eyes that’s unnerving. Even you can see it.

69/10. The creep runs off, making some excuse or whatever. Sampo watches them for a minute before turning to you and smiling. You rush to give him a hug and he happily returns it.

“Wanna go home? Seems like that idiot trashed your mood a little.”

Gepard

Gepard is a very shy guy and he’s not one to be all touchy-touchy without you doing it first. He gets all flustered and looks away��� but he’ll lean into your touch.

He usually sticks around you, keeping your attention so no creepies come by, but sometimes he gets pulled away. He always lets you know he’ll be right back and leaves for just a few moments. Enough for a creepy to sneak in >:0

When Gepard notices the creep, he wastes no time walking over to you. “Is everything ok?” He asked, looking at you. If you shook your head, that was it. The captain of the silvermane’s came out!

The first glare is usually a 50/50. Sometimes, the creeps acted all annoyed and walk away, pretending they’re not scared but other times… they challenge him. Gepard just places a hand on their shoulder and shoves them back. It’s actually surprisingly strong- they’ll fall over sometimes.

10/10, that usually sends them running. On rare occasions there’s that ONE creepy who just stands up and tries to take him on lmao. You know to take a step back because Gepard kinda skips the arresting and just goes to ass kicking. And he’s the shy boyfriend.

“So… we should go now. Yeah, no, just leave the creep there.”

Jing Yuan

Jing Yuan isn't the most affectionate boyfriend, but he doesn’t mind letting people know you two are together. Depends on your comfort level.

He’s a busy man, so at that fancy event, he can’t always be at your side but he tries to keep you by him. Of course, you decided to go get a drink, he happily agreed. You went off and he kept greeting more officials. You didn’t return, so he looked over and he just saw you turning away from a creep who just grabbed your arm!

Jing Yuan elegantly excuses himself and basically sneaks up behind the guy. He’ll stand there which brings you tons of relief, enough to let the creep ramble and ramble and ramble. “I could take you out to dinner, (nickname you don’t like). I’ll buy you (food you don’t like).” “Actually, they don’t like that. And they don’t like being called that.” The creep jumps away and is standing beside you at that point.

5/10, honestly, some just get scared and leave. There’s the other half though that just kinda scoff and look at you. Before they can even say anything, Jing Yuan grabs them by the shirt and force them to look at him. “Do not speak to them like that. Do not look at them, and don’t even think about them. You leave now or I’ll drag you out myself.”

10/10!!!!!!!!! They are GONE. No sign of them for MILES. Jing Yuan huffs and looks down at you. At this point, everyone’s looking at you two, making you extremely uncomfortable. He’ll stand beside you and pull you close, using that half of his jacket thing to cover you.

“We can leave. I’ll deal with everything else later. Come on.”

Luocha

This man is unpredictable. Sometimes, he’s grabbing your hand to prove your dating, others are just a straight kiss. You don’t mind. Either way, the world knows you two are together.

Luocha doesn’t mind leaving you alone, he’s got confidence in himself and you. That doesn’t mean he’s not there as your backup. Creeps creep on a daily- he’s gotchu. He sees the creep and he’s already walking toward you.

“No!” You exclaimed with a frown, “I'm not interested. Leave me alone.” Luocha didn’t mind scaring the creep off… but it was when they grabbed you that kinda set him off. “Hey.” Is all he says as he grabs their wrist to shove their hand away. 3/10. SOMETIMES people do get scared off by his demeanor. But there’s always that one. Our favorite.

For those guys, he’ll just get physical. There’s just this switch that goes off when it comes to you. 10/10. They’re either gone or out like a light.

“Come, we should go somewhere else.”

Blade

Lol. First of all, people know you’re dating this dude because you’re still alive while hanging off his arm. He’s not affectionate in public other than some sweet words. “You look nice today.” “I think you did well.” Things like that.

Blade can… be a helicopter boyfriend because he just has a 6th sense for creepies. You can be doing your own thing and he’s just standing there. Menacingly. There are days where he’s away from you, but he keeps a sharp eye on you. Then he notices the creep.

“Go away.” You say with a huff as you turn away. “Stop!” You yell, trying to pull your hand away. Suddenly, the creep is silent and frozen. You probably know exactly what happened.

You feel your arm come loose and look behind you to see Blade pointing… well his blade at the creep. He doesn’t say anything and the creep can’t help but just feel the icy fear in their veins. 10/10, Blade doesn’t fail.

“Thank you.” You say with a sigh as you run and hug his arm, looking up at him. Blade sighs and looks down at you, feeling that relief in his chest knowing that you’re fine and right beside him where you should be.

“It’s because you look cute today. Let’s go somewhere else.”

[britany1997]

OH HOLD UP REQUESTS ARE BACK OPEN?!

Bestie, I am begging on my knees for that smutty vampire reader × poly lost boys fic/idea we discussed 🙇🏼🙇🏼 (If you're not feeling that rn, no sweat 💋)

Hot Vampires In Your Area

Yes absolutely I can do this!!! Vampires Everywhere is my most popular fic to date! I hope you like this!

Poly! Lost Boys x GN Vampire Reader

Warnings: SMUT minors DNI, biting, handjobs, penetration (But no mention of reader’s genitalia) mentions of blood, brief daddy kink (again, Dwayne is daddy always) I think that’s it

🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇

Blood stained the back of your hand as you wiped harshly at your mouth. Your clothes were practically falling off your body, the signs of your victims struggle apparent from the many rips and tears.

You breathed deeply, brushing hair out of your face and leaning back on the bar of the dock. You zoned out looking into the ocean as bubbles sprang to the surface, likely from the bodies that had sunken beneath.

You were broken from your trance however when you felt a pair of teeth nipping at your neck. You sighed and leaned into the touch of whoever was nibbling at you.

“What are you doing Paul,” you hummed, your eyes fluttering closed as he continued to nip at you.

He chuckled as he licked a stripe over his fang marks, pulling a gasp from your lips, “don’t be a hypocrite babe,” he purred, “you were all ready to take a chunk outta me earlier,” he reminded you, “I’m just returning the favor,” he whispered into your ear before nibbling at the lobe.

You hummed and smiled as he toyed with you, smearing blood from his lips onto your neck and ear. “You’re such a messy eater Paul,” you teased him, spinning out of his grip, “why don’t you clean yourself up first.”

He laughed, “worried about a little blood babe?” He asked, “c��mere and lick it off me sugar.”

You caved and walked into Paul’s awaiting arms, he caged you in his embrace as you placed your hands on either side of his face and licked his lips clean.

Once you were done, he shifted you till you were pressed up against the railing of the dock. He slid his tongue into your mouth and kissed you deeply. You snaked your hand into his hair, pulling at it lightly and prompting a moan to fall from his lips.

You smiled into the kiss as he kept you pinned where he wanted you.

“Paulie,” David sing-songed from the other end of the dock, “don’t forget to share,” he said smirking.

You pulled away from Paul to shift your gaze to the other boys as they began to walk towards you and the blond vampire currently attached to your neck.

David smirked as he stood by your side, stroking your hair as Paul sucked hickeys into your skin. Marko stood at your other side, his head cocked as he bit hit thumb. His eyes raked up and down your form as he watched Paul ravish you.

Dwayne came up behind David to stare at you as well. You squirmed a bit under his soulful and curious gaze.

The boys all watched you as Paul dug into your neck. Him you could handle, but with the all of them surrounding you, it was…intimidating.

“Can I help you?” You squeaked. You’d meant to sound sarcastic, but you came off nervous instead. David shot you his signature smirk as he continued to play with your hair. “We were actually thinking we could help you,” he whispered into your ear.

“Paul,” he barked, snapping. Paul groaned and rolled his eyes, but pulled away from your neck and passed you into Dwayne’s awaiting arms. Dwayne cradled your form against his chest and crossed his arms over you. He trailed kisses from your cheek down to your neck as he began to suck hickeys to match the ones Paul had given you on the other side.

You sucked in a breath as your brain went fuzzy with the feeling of Dwayne’s teeth on your skin. Where Paul had been passionate and eager, Dwayne was sensual and slow, almost as if he was savoring you.

David faced you, ignoring Dwayne as he spoke, “it must have been so lonely in your little coven of one,” he pouted at you as he stroked your cheek.

“For us,” he began, “feeding always satiates one appetite, but awakens another,” he raked his eyes up and down your body and you gasped as Dwayne hit an especially sensitive spot on you.

“We have each other of course,” David told you, “but it must have been so frustrating for you to spend all those nights on your own.” You blushed at his implications, furrowing your brow and looking down so you didn’t have to meet his eyes.

He tilted your chin upward until your gaze met his. “Why don’t you let us take care of you baby,” he whispered.

Your eyes widened, unsure of how to reply. “c’mon babeee,” Paul whined, “we could make you feel sooo good.”

David chuckled at Paul’s enthusiasm, “my boys are very well-trained,” he told you as Dwayne bit down on you for emphasis, causing another gasp to spring from your lips. “Why don’t you let us have you,” he proposed.

You turned your head to look at Dwayne, he pulled away from your neck to meet your gaze before pressing a gentle kiss to your lips. You felt your eyes close as you returned it.

You pulled away after a bit to look at the other boys. David smirked at you, his fingers still twirling the ends of your hair, as if he already knew your answer.

Marko’s eyes were fixed on you in a lust filled stare, his teeth grinding into his thumb so hard you thought he’d bite straight through the leather of his glove.

Paul was practically begging you with his eyes. You could feel the desire radiating off him. His hands were shaking lightly, as if they couldn’t wait to be on you once more. His lip stuck out in a pout as his brow furrowed. There was no hiding how badly he wanted you as he bounced on his feet in anticipation. He was so wired you thought he might explode with need.

Dwayne lowered his lips to your ear, “we can be gentle if you’d like,” he told you softly, licking the shell of your ear when he finished speaking.

You moaned softly, your eyes fluttering closed as he kept you wrapped in his arms. “No need,” you assured him. He smiled at you.

“Dwayne,” David prompted, jerking his head to gesture toward Marko. Dwayne nodded and passed you to Marko, who picked you up and sat you on the dock’s railing.

Marko shrugged off your jacket and tore your shirt off, revealing your bare chest.

“You guys wanna do this right here?” You asked nervously. Marko gave you a devilish grin, “why wait to go all the way back to the cave babe? We want you now.” He said, his eyes flashing yellow.

“If you’re worried someone will see, don’t be,” David told you. “It’s too dark down here anyway, and if someone were to get an eyeful…well let’s just say they wouldn’t get far,” he grinned, before placing a hand on Dwayne’s shoulder. “Dwayne’s a growing boy,” he said.

“But if you’re not comfortable…” Dwayne offered, searching your face for signs you wanted to stop.

“No I’m fine, that makes sense,” you said as Marko stood between your legs and began to caress the sides of your hips gently, “I want this,” you breathed as you whimpered at Marko’s touches.

Marko leaned down to place soft kisses on your chest, licking and sucking the skin as he went. You moaned as he carressed you. You snaked a hand into his hair and stroked and pulled it as the boys watched the two of you.

As Marko kissed all over you, you trailed your other hand down his abdomen, before reaching down and palming him through his jeans.

He groaned as he pulled away to unbuckle his pants and free himself from his boxers for you.

You wrapped your hand around the length of him and began to stroke softly when something caught your eye.

Paul was biting his lip so hard you thought he’d rip it open, his hands were wrapped around himself in a tight hug, his cock straining in his pants as he watched you.

You smirked and beckoned him over, “don’t worry Paul,” you assured him, “I’ve got two hands.”

He moaned loudly as he raced to the side of you. Marko rolled his eyes but laughed at the sight of Paul struggling to rid himself of his pants as quickly as possible.

The other boys snickered too as they watched his face contort in pleasure as you wrapped a hand around his length as well.

You stroked the two chaos vamps up and down as you rubbed your thumb in circles around their tips. Marko purred softly at your touch, while Paul let out low moans and words of encouragement. You’d lost count of how many times he’d said, “yeah baby,” and “right there.”

You smiled softly as they both came undone in your hands. When he came down from his high, Paul pulled Marko from his place between your legs before picking you up from the railing and placing you down. He caged you in once again with an arm on either side you.

He captured your lips in a searing kiss and let out a growl. He took your lip between his teeth and pulled, making you moan.

“Your ours babe,” he growled, “we’re never lettin’ you go, not after that.”

You smiled back at him, leaning forward to peck his lips, “I’m not goin’ anywhere pretty boy,” you told him.

He groaned before sealing his mouth over yours once more and plunging his tongue past your lips to explore you.

The kiss was cut short as David pulled Paul away by his collar, he grasped for you as he squirmed in David’s grip.

“Paul,” David spoke firmly, “you had a turn, now be a good boy and watch,” he ordered, flinging Paul towards Marko.

Paul fumed from the sidelines as Dwayne came up to you.

You blushed, Dwayne’s mysterious and imposing demeanor made you nervous.

“Hi,” you said meekly as you stared up at him. “Hi,” he said back to you, bending down to place a kiss to your forehead.

His treatment made butterflies bloom in your stomach.

“Turn around for me?” He asked.

“Ok,” you whimpered.

You turned to face the ocean as Dwayne wrapped his arms around your middle and nuzzled his nose into the crook of your neck. He reached around you pull off your pants and underwear, leaving you completely bare. You blushed as you were totally exposed before him.

You didn’t have long to dwell on your shyness, as you felt him prodding at you from behind. You gasped as you felt the size of him, he was definitely bigger than the other boys.

“Is this ok?” He asked you, concern and gentleness present in his voice.

You smiled at his care for you, “yes,” you told him, “yes it’s ok.”

He leaned down till his lips were against the shell of your ear, “You can call me daddy if you want,” he whispered, causing a flush to rise to your cheeks. “They all do,” he told you as he gestured towards the other boys.

“You can fuck me now daddy,” you breathed as you grinded against him.

He smirked as he pushed into you slowly, allowing you to adjust to his size, but you still sucked in a sharp breath at the intrusion.

As he rocked back and forth into you, soft moans fell from your mouth, he caressed the deepest parts of you with every stroke.

The other boys looked on with lust filled eyes, taking themselves into their hands as they watched Dwayne turn you into a pile of moans and whimpers.

After awhile Dwayne spilled into you, prompting your own climax as well.

You turned over and rested against the railing on shaking legs as he slipped off his jacket and placed it over your shoulders.

He picked you up in his arms and held you against his chest. Marko and Paul grabbed your clothes from where they were scattered on the dock.

You shot David a confused look as Dwayne carried you, “what about you?” You asked him.

He smirked, “you wanna take care of me baby?” That’s sweet,” he teased. “Trust me babe, I’ll get a taste of you too, but you’ll wanna be lying down for that,” he told you laughing.

Your eyes widened as you breath caught in your throat as you pictured what was yet to come. Daytime was hours away, and you knew that eternity with the boys would give you many more nights of passion, just like this one.

🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇

Taglist❤️ (comment to be added):

@solobagginses @misslavenderlady @pixielostboy @ghoulgeousimmaculate @anna1306 @6lostgirl6 @its-freaking-bats @heyriojude

[aemondsbabe]

A Promise is a Promise

summary: promises & phone sex || tom's trying his best to make it home to you by christmas, but a snowstorm derails his plans

pairing: tom bennett x f!reader

warnings: mature/explicit, 18+ (minors dni!), no use of y/n, afab reader, phone sex, dirty talk, fingering, masturbation, breast/nipple play, very slight angst but happy ending, probably not historically accurate bite me, let me know if i missed anything!

word count: 2.3k

a/n: happy day eleven of 12 days of smuff and happy christmas eve to everyone who celebrates!! hope y'all enjoy this one! Can be read as a part 2 to Homecoming or as a stand alone!

12 days of smuff masterlist!

gif creds to @rxyl

likes, comments, & reblogs are very appreciated but never required!

🌟add yourself to my taglist to be notified when i post new fics!

Your breath fogs up the window as you look outside one last time, sighing heavily as you watch puffy snowflakes rain down from the sky, scattering through the pale yellow shafts of light from the street lamps. You peer up and down the quiet street, frowning at the sight of all the twinkling lights and festive candles that decorated so many of the townhouses, feeling decidedly un-cheery this year. 

Deciding that it wasn’t worth it to torture yourself further, you pad up the stairs to your bedroom, trying to ignore the soft glow from the Christmas tree in the front room. Your footsteps sound much louder than normal in the quiet house since your parents were out for the evening, attending some holiday party at a friend's house, one that you were in much too foul of a mood to even consider attending. 

You’ve hardly had the chance to change your clothes before the phone in your room starts ringing loudly, making you jump. Sitting on your bed, you roll your eyes as you reach for it, expecting it to be your parents or some friend, calling half drunk from a party no doubt. 

“Hello?” You sigh, pressing the phone to your ear as you stare disdainfully out the window, watching more and more of the traitorous snow fall from the dark sky. 

“Well, try not to sound too excited.” A familiar voice chuckles, instantly making you perk up.

“Tom?!” Your eyes widen as you press the phone harder against your ear, “Where are you? Are you okay? I thought you said you’d be home this afternoon!”

You can hear him laugh on the other end of the line at your rushed questions. “Relax, love, I’m fine,” he sighs, you can hear springs squeak softly in the background, like he’d sat down on a bed, “The train’s just got delayed, ice on the rails or some fucking nonsense, and with the damn snowstorm, well…” He sighs heavily.

“Delayed for how long?” You ask, crestfallen. 

“Dunno, the man at the station said maybe a day, maybe two,” you can practically hear his frustrated sneer, “What with it being Christmas eve, everything’s just a damn wreck, apparently.”

“Oh…” You try not to sound too heartbroken, not wanting him to feel worse, “Well, did you find somewhere to stay in the meantime? I hate the idea of you sitting at the station.”

“Yeah,” he scoffs, “Some shoddy little inn. The train had to stop at some farming town in the middle of God knows where, but a bed’s a bed, I suppose.” You can hear two thuds in the background, no doubt him tossing his boots off somewhere carelessly. 

“I’m glad you’re somewhere safe, Tommy,” you smile sadly, idly fidgeting with the bottom of your night shirt, well, really his nightshirt, “I wish you were with me, though.” You whisper, trying to ignore the sad little squeeze your heart gave. 

“Wish I was too, love.”

The two of you sit in a comfortable silence for a moment, happy to simply listen to each other breathe after so many months apart. You really are trying not to let it get to you too much, but he only got so many days of leave from the RN and once he got shipped back out… you dare not think about it too deeply. 

There’s some rustling on the other end of the line and you furrow your brows as you listen, hoping the storm isn’t interfering with the phone lines too. 

“Tom?”

“‘M here,” he reassures you, springs creaking again as he settles back on the hotel bed, “Was just taking off my shirt.” He cooed, making you roll your eyes as you picture his playful smirk, your cheeks flushing as you imagined that cheeky little head bop that followed most of his lewd comments. 

“Now there’s a sight I’d like to see.” You hum, reclining back against the many pillows on your bed with a small smirk.

“Bet you’d be falling all over yourself for it,” he laughs, propping up a knee, “It’s a miracle you’ve lasted this long without it.”

“Without what?”

“My cock.” He answers, voice confident and cocky. 

“Tommy!” You squeak, giggling despite yourself, which makes him chuckle on the other end, “And here I was hoping months away would turn you into a romantic!”

“Fat chance, love.” He laughs heartily, smiling genuinely for the first time in months. 

Again, a comfortable silence washes over the two of you, each of you clinging to the phone like it was truly a lifeline, feeling closer than you have in months although you’re God knows how many kilometers apart. 

He sighs again, though this one makes you smile. It’s a familiar sigh, one he only does before he says something he knows will get a rise out of you.

“What’re you wearing?” You can hear his smirk, you can practically feel it on you as he speaks, his voice already low and raspy. 

You can’t help the tittering little giggle you let out, biting your lip as your cheeks flush further. “Erm, just your button down, actually,” you say, shy all of a sudden as you squirm atop your covers, “The one you wore in secondary some days… oh, and knickers.”

“And knickers,” he murmurs, quiet for a moment before continuing, “My girl in my shirt n’ I’m not there to see it. A real shame.”

“Yeah…” you whisper, fidgeting with the small buttons lining the front. 

“D’you have my shirt buttoned, love?”

“Yes?”

“You think you could unbutton it for me?”

The way he asks for it has your heart racing, excitement building steadily within you as you rub your thighs together, already seeking something to lessen the tension within you. Almost automatically, your hands reach for the buttons as you cradle the phone on your shoulder, holding it in place with your cheek. 

“Yes, Tommy.”

“That’s a good girl, love.” He praises, chuckling lowly as a small, delicate whimper just barely makes it through the phone lines. 

You scramble, all but ripping the shirt in two until finally the fabric falls away. You’re already breathing heavier, chest heaving enough to have the shirt slip off your chest instantly; your nipples harden quickly in the cool air of your bedroom, the small radiator only doing so much to heat the space. 

“It’s unbuttoned.” You breathe, squeezing your eyes shut as you desperately try to envision him doing the same. 

“God, I wish I was there,” he sighs and your ears perk up when you hear a soft tinkling in the background, cheeks heating up at the thought of him slowly taking off his belt, “I miss those perfect fucking tits, lovely girl. Got off thinking about them every night.”

“Yeah?” You ask breathily, your fingers skimming softly over your stomach, coming to rest in the valley between your breasts. 

“Mhm,” he murmurs, already breathing hotly into the phone, “Pinch them for me, pretty girl, yeah? Like I would.”

You gasp and quickly do as he requests, not being able to hold off any longer yourself. You whimper into the receiver as you tweak your nipples, your eyes roll back in your head at the thrill that shoots down your spine and settles right between your legs. 

“Fuck, good girl.” He praises again, sounding like he’s speaking through clenched teeth.

“What’re you wearing?” You ask breathily, lightly tugging at your stiff nipples still as you rub your thighs together, your center already aching, “What’re you doing?” 

“‘M rubbing my cock through my boxers,” he sighs heavily, “S’all I’ve got on.”

The thought makes you whimper again, imagining him cupping his already twitching length through the thin fabric of his underwear. Your mouth waters as you picture a wet patch near the tip, his cock leaking at the thought of you. 

“Tommy,” you sigh as your back arches into your own touch, “Can I?” 

Your meek question makes him chuckle. “Can you do what, love? You’ll need to be specific.”

You whine this time, biting your lip as your cheeks flush. “C-Can I…” you start, still feeling so impossibly shy around him sometimes, “Can I touch myself?”

“Thought you were already touching your tits?”

“Tommy!”

“C’mon, pretty,” he laughs, licking his lips as he imagines how cute you must look, cheeks all blushed with embarrassment, “Y’know what I wanna hear.”

“Can I touch my cunt?” You murmur, voice high-pitched and breathy.

“Fuck,” he breathes, head lolling back against his pillow, “Yeah, y’can, love, lemme hear you.”

Mindlessly, your hand drifts down. You don’t even bother to take off your panties, too impatient to go to the trouble as you shove your hand inside. A moan is punched out of you at the first touch, your core already throbbing as you glide your fingers through your slick folds. Tom groans along with you as your fingers finally begin swirling around your clit, your thighs spreading further. 

“What, shit,” you sigh, a shudder rippling up your spine, “What’re you doing now?”

“Got my cock out,” he rasps, his voice catching, “Thinking about you while I fuck my hand, God, I wish it was your tight cunt, pretty girl.”

You whine again, back arching once more as your fingers skim over your clit before dipping down to gather more slick from your dripping entrance. You all but see stars when you rub yourself again, core clenching around nothing. 

“Wish you were here…” You murmur, breath catching as you move your hand a little quicker. 

“Yeah?” He asks in a low voice, “What would you want me to do?”

“Fuck me,” you whine, wiggling your hips impatiently, like he was just at the end of the bed teasing you instead of lost somewhere in the countryside, “Want you to fuck me, Tommy.”

He groans, louder than he probably should in a small inn. Your face flushes when you hear him spit, imaging his cock glistening as he uses it to stroke himself. 

“Christ, I miss that pretty cunt,” he mutters, breath catching, probably speeding up in time with you, “Get a finger in there, love, fuck yourself like I would.”

Obediently, you do as he says, rutting against your own hand as you unceremoniously push two fingers into yourself, marveling at how tightly your walls already clench around them. 

“Fuck, Tommy!” You squeak, clit tingling every time your palm smacks against it as you fuck youself. 

“God, that’s it,” he groans, “Keep going, fuck, ‘m not gonna last.” He warns, knowing it’s been too long since he’d last had any privacy. 

“‘M not going to either,” you assure him, shaking your head to your empty room as if he could see you, “Feels too good, oh!” You gasp, your whole body tensing up as you crook your fingers up, expertly locating that sensitive spot within you. 

The two of you pleasure yourselves together for another few moments, heavy breaths and moans passing between the phones. Finally, Tom groans lowly again and swears through gritted teeth. 

“Fuck, ‘m gonna cum,” he pants, the slick sound of his hand streaking over his cock in the background nearly makes you unravel, “Cum with me, pretty girl, please.”

The whiny way he says please is your undoing and you finally break, calling out his name breathily as you arch against your sheets. Slick sounds fill your bedroom as you peak, breathless at the way your core clenches rhythmically over your fingers. 

Tom isn’t far behind you, his rough groans only adding to your pleasure. You whimper when he hisses out your name as he finishes, envisioning the way he paints his lower stomach with spend, cock twitching against his palm. 

You breathe heavily for a moment as you both come down before you dissolve into giggles, your sour mood from earlier almost completely gone. 

“Fucked you dumb n’ I’m not even there,” Tom gloats, sighing as he wipes away his cum with his boxers, too tired to get up and clean himself off properly, “You’re gonna make me blush, love.” 

“Tommy!” You groan playfully, admonishing him through a giggle, “You’re horrible.”

“You love it.” He laughs tiredly, yawning quietly. 

“Tired?”

“Yeah,” he huffs, the bed squeaking again as he makes himself comfortable, “Sorry love, s’been a long day.”

“I would imagine so,” you smile sadly still, twirling the phone cord around a finger, “I’ll let you sleep.”

“I’ll get to you tomorrow,” he promises, his voice heavy with sleep, “I swear, told you I’d be back for Christmas.”

“Tommy…” You sigh, glancing out the window to see snow still pouring from the sky.

“I mean it,” he murmurs tiredly, “A promise is a promise.”

You wake with a start, jerking up in bed as you look around blearily, unsure of what woke you. Your eyes narrow as you glance at the clock on your bedside table, too early still for even your alarm to be going off. 

You jump as you hear a knock from downstairs, someone pounding at the door. Rolling your eyes, you slip on a robe before making your way downstairs. 

“I’m coming, I’m coming.” You sigh, rubbing sleep from your eyes as you reach for the doorknob, tugging it open with a frown. 

“Wha–” You stop in your tracks, gasping loudly.

“Y’gonna let me in or are you gonna leave me out here to freeze my bollocks off?” Tom asks with a grin, laughing when you practically leap into his arms and pull him into a suffocating hug. 

“Tommy!” You gasp, clinging to him, “How did you, when did you?” You stutter, a million questions running through your mind. Finally, you pull back just enough to look at him, nearly crying as you at last look into his familiar blue eyes, “How?” You breathe.

“A very nice famer with a truck,” he laughs, holding you tightly to him, “Told ya I’d get home to you by Christmas.” 

Not being able to hold off anymore, you press your lips against his, feeling warm despite the cold.

tagged lovelies: @helloworldiamnotarobot @drakonflames @marysucks-blog @watercolorskyy @valeskafics @iamaegontargaryenwife0 @aemshaircare @1997babyyyy @lovellies @little-moonbeam-666 @blackswxnn @alerisc @fan-goddess @wickedfrsgrl @moonriseoverkyoto @echos-muses @schniiipsel @avidreader73 @marvelescvpe @imawhorecrux @grsveeth0m

(tags are based on your answers to my google form; if you were mistakenly tagged, please contact me & update your answers on the form! thank you!)

[mylevisdontfitanymore]

Hear me out I am very high from a edible rn but HEAR ME OUT DUDE

so we all know Chris Evans and his absolute slutty build like cmon he literally was nicknamed the human dorito bc slutty waist

Anyways thinking about that one promo pic of Chris in the cap suit with his back turned to the camera and his ass is just perfect ANYWAYS FR THIS TIME

Thinking about stucky but not like dating but Bucky being obsessed with Steve’s absolutely slutty figure and once the two get close to being fully retired Steve gets bigger as he slowly grows accustomed to taking it easy for once. but not exactly just fatter everything is the same but somehow softer and bigger. His thighs spread out more when he sits his chest is massive not quite defined pecs but far from being flabby moobs they’re just huge, his abs are long gone but he doesn’t have a round gut (Atleast when he’s empty) and the best part that makes bucky go crazy is his love handles , ass, and thighs, all perfectly packed together in one big package that makes Bucky lose his shit. Steves ass has nearly doubled but it’s still a perfect bubble butt, and his thighs have filled out enough to close any gap that might’ve occurred even when he has a wide stance. (Think those really chunky frat boys that manspread and their thighs are still somehow touching) BUT Steve’s suit and most of his wardrobe hasn’t changed so his clothes just accentuate his assets. His thighs and ass taking up most of the room in his pants and they perfectly leave Steve’s bulge completely on display almost like a gift from god to Bucky. Anyways I’m sure if you did add to this you’d be able to express that better than I could! And if you don’t THATS ALSO COOL (pls by no means feel like you have to answer this right away )

THIS HAS VIBES 🤤🤤

You know what kind of vibes? Exhibitionist Captain America vibes from this post by iwritetheweirdstuff

And I assume you're talking about this photo, which I nabbed from forchrisevans

Okay, shit...

Now you just have me thinking about chunky but still super fucking muscular Steve. I’m going off the rails over here, biting and clawing at my enclosure. I don’t think this rambling is actually totally related to your original idea, so just know I love your original idea!

But this reaoly gets me because Steve would be such a fucking classic MAN. Yanno? Big and heavy and robust. He looks like he could take Bucky in his big, beefy arms and rip him apart. He’s healthy. Hefty. Rippling muscles hidden under this layer of pudge.

Yum.

Unbeta'd stucky belly kink ahead. Warning for weight gain, muscle chub talk, tight clothes, Bucky being a little creepy by drooling over Steve before they're an item, etc.

Before gaining weight and when he was wearing the title of Captain American so tightly that it was suffocating him to the point that he was unforgiving of himself, never good enough as Steve Rogers, Steve was like a Thoroughbred. A racehorse, smooth and lean, with a single objective. Win. But now that he’s looser with the title and deciding what he wants for himself, more often calling himself a nomad than going by Cap… now he’s gruff, ignoring the rules (ignoring them even more than he did before, which is saying something for a troublemaker like him), and he’s like a Clydesdale. He’s a tank.

A fucking beast.

When he’s running, you get out of the fucking way because of all the mass behind that force. If you let him collide with you at full speed, full force… it ain’t pretty. His feet pound the ground. Jesus wept. These days his chest, belly, and ass shake when he runs, even when his big, big body is wrapped tightly in all that deep, navy-blue Kevlar. The sight just destroys Bucky.

Bucky can’t fucking fight next to him anymore when they’re called in for Avenging every now and again, half-retired as they are. It was bad enough when Steve was that Thoroughbred, rippling lean muscle and a shiny, bright blond head of short hair. Always distracting Bucky. But now it’s worse because Steve is a Clydesdale with this heft to him and his dirty blond hair and dark, thick beard. He’s even letting his body hair grow in, and it’s all Bucky can do to not faint, landing face-first into the deepening cleavage between his robust pecs, inhaling the musk of him. Every time Steve grunts with the effort of punching or kicking or tearing some offending villain to pieces, Bucky swears he feels faint. He has this completely involuntary feral reaction to the burly man he’s become. Hunky. Stocky. Ripped. Hefty. Whatever fucking word there is for the built he’s got going… it makes Bucky’s mouth water.

Of course, Steve’s still only two inches taller - 6’2” to Bucky’s 6’0” - but suddenly he feels a whole foot taller, and he feels twice as wide as Bucky. Those broad shoulders are only made wider, reinforced by the extra protein he’s eating, thickening his muscles and adding soft pudge; his pecs are still high and tight but even more… they’re swollen almost, added to by an irresistible layer of fat that Bucky has the primal urge to bite; the abs he had once upon a time, defined enough to use as a washboard have softened, especially after a hearty meal like a good lumberjack’s breakfast or a caveman’s dinner, just, these big plates with plenty of meat piled onto them, which turn his stomach into this drool-worthy curve, a little belly that sticks around until he somehow manages to digest it all; that fucking ass made even rounder and more shapely to the point that his pants all strain across it, his sweats especially, nearly splitting down the middle whenever he gets out of his comfy recliner; his thighs, oh, Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, they’re ripe, rubbing together and trying to bust outta his jeans, his sweats, even his Captain America uniform.

Bucky has it bad.

If he weren’t so focused on trying to not let his animal out, growling and just fucking tackling Steve to the floor, he would feel terrible for how much he’s sexualizing his best pal. It seems no matter what he’s doing, Bucky’s caveman brain is thinking about how to best peel him out of his too-small clothes. Too tight when he was lean with rippling muscles, barely any body fat on him, and especially too fucking tight now when he has this delicious extra give to him. He looks like a size two sausage stuffed into a size one casing. Bucky curses his wardrobe at the same time that he would fall to his knees and thank it with his hands pressed together, praying to it. He wants to be there for the day that Steve busts out of it after a heavy, hearty, indulgent dinner.

‘Cause, listen, Bucky’s spank bank is just overflowing these days:

When the most recent battle is done and Steve bends over to pick up a fucking massive slab of concrete, he unintentionally gives Bucky a front-row seat to his thick ass. His curves barely fit in his uniform these days. Honestly, Bucky doesn’t know how he puts that godforsaken, tight-as-hell uniform on by himself anyway. And he doesn’t want to think about it. Not in public! The only way he can imagine it happening is with Steve naked save for a jock strap, alone in his room. First, he steps into the legs, then he works it up his calves, getting it to his thighs where it gets stuck. He’s outgrowing it. It’s a tight fit, but he still fits for now. At least, he fits when he shimmies and wiggles into it. Better than a damn stripper. Moving his body in this unintentionally, totally sexy way. Wiggling. Pulling. Squirming. Even jumping while he’s at it, pulling hard at the thick Kevlar, his biceps bulging - they’re bigger than Bucky’s fucking head now - grunting as he holds his breath, sucking in. Sucking in! His chest expanding without his pudgy, starter belly going anywhere, stubborn and jiggly.

Whenever he bends over, he gives Bucky a show, really. It doesn’t matter where they are...

When he’s bent over looking at the leaky pipe under their kitchen sink, his waist filling more of the open cabinet than it once would have. While he’s down there, his shirt rolls up over his soft little hips, the new weight just beginning to accumulate there. The start of what could be real love handles someday.

When he’s looking through the bottom drawer of the fridge, doing a head count before they head out for groceries. He’s not dressed yet, though, so he doesn’t have a belt to hold his pants up and his sweats slide down the shelf of his ass, displaying just enough of his asscrack for Bucky to feel starved, meaning he’s extra grumpy at having to wander around an overcrowded store. Shoulder to shoulder with strangers. Hungry and horny.

When he’s drawing on the couch and he accidentally lets a pencil fall onto the floor, so he has to get up, but, oops, it looks like it must’ve rolled under the couch so he gets even lower. Onto his knees and forearms. Searching blindly for the pencil… blind to Bucky’s eyes, perving out on how his thighs touch from the back now, his legs getting just as thick as his ass is. And it’s thick.

When he’s doing stretches on their balcony in the morning, breathing in the fresh air, doing some cat-cows, and inadvertently displaying his new belly that’s still rumbling through last night’s dessert. A classic, couple 'a slices of pie and ice cream. Too much pie and ice cream judging by how distended his belly looks.

When they’re getting some of their energy out now that they’re not constantly going out and avenging, half-retired, by sparing with each other in the gym. Sparing, kind of wrestling, too. They’re not trying to be tactical about it, they’re just having fun, being big kids, reminiscent of the days when they’d pull the mattress off the bed and start to play fighting on the floor. But they aren’t kids and Steve isn’t so much smaller than him, so Bucky doesn’t have to focus on finding that perfect balance of holding back just enough where it doesn’t seem like he is but he’s also not at risk of pushing Steve’s frail body too far. Now they can really whale on each other. Which is fun… until it isn’t. Because Bucky is laughing and sweating and actually starting to feel tired, and then he’s pinned, and he’s choking back a moan, sweating harder. Steve is on top of him. Steve is crushing him. Steve’s big, hot chest is against his back - Bucky can feel how he’s sweating through his skintight white t-shirt, his thick pecs squishing against his shoulder blades. Steve’s delightful, chubby, little belly is slotted perfectly into the small of his back. While fighting, Bucky’s shirt has risen up, and apparently, Steve’s has done the same, despite how firmly it had been clinging to his soft middle the last time he dared to sneak a peak because now their sweaty, hot skin is pressed together. Steve’s hairy tummy is tickling him, making Bucky want to squirm. He wants to moan. It’s a good fucking thing he’s face-down with Steve on top of him. He wants more than just to squirm and moan, he wants to hump the floor like an animal because with Steve’s tits pressed to his back and his belly squished to his back, it aligns his crotch right up against his ass. Bucky can feel Steve’s dick on his ass through the thin layers of their sweatpants and underwear. He can feel how heavy it is. And he’s thinking about how Steve’s dick probably blushes a dusky pink and gets wet at the time and how it probably curves a little and gets so thick when he’s hard and… this is where Bucky dies because Steve readjusts himself, making it worse by spreading his killer thighs to either side of Bucky’s legs, practically grinding into him, trapping him between his watermelon-crushing thighs. “Had enough?” Steve teases him with a shit-eating grin. God. Only if the fucker knew.

When Natasha adopts a new, abandoned kitten that she’s named Liho and they go over to play with him at Tasha’s apartment and Steve decides to grin like he does, always breath-taking, his smile the sweetest, most affectionate thing as he lifts Liho up above his head like Simba in the Lion King (yes, they’ve caught up on that modern pop culture reference, thank you very much). Bucky nearly goes cross-eyed, staring at his pecs. His t-shirt clings to his round, heavy tits. With his arms up, it forces his pecs to move up, too. High and plump. Bucky can see every detail of them, he can see every breath he takes, making them heave, and he’s almost able to pick out the tiniest creaking groan of the seams of his shirt screaming under all that pressure. Tasha doesn’t bat an eye, at the treatment Steve is giving her new companion, she just squeezes past Steve in her kitchen (is the apartment that small, or is Steve that big?), flicking one of his hard nipples. The points of them are obvious through the straining, thin fabric. She refills her mug with coffee but she doesn’t take a sip until she reminds Steve that if he wants to see how much more comfortable running can be, he only has to say the word and she’ll show him the magic of sports bras. Everyone can see that he needs it, and he might as well embrace it. They can even get matching ones if he wants. Her smile is razor-sharp, teasing. Bucky nearly chokes on his tongue, imagining the heavy mounds of his tits hoised up higher, giving him even more cleavage than he normally sports. Guh. Bucky wouldn’t survive.

When later during that same day, Steve decides he’s going to lie down on Natasha’s couch as they watch a movie - some Russian production that Tasha’s been telling Bucky about forever (he’s hardly paying attention and it’s Steve’s fault that he’s going to have to watch this again, on his own, during one of his sleepless nights when he can pay attention to it) - and Liho decides that Steve’s his favorite. So, he wanders back over to curl up on his soft chest and belly and starts fucking kneading his plush chest and belly like it’s the comfiest, fluffiest pillow ever. It probably fucking is! And Bucky can’t blame the kitten for purring so loudly - despite Steve’s and Tasha’s amusement at it - Bucky would be no better. He spends the rest of the evening biting the inside of his cheek and trying to banish all the mental images of his own hands kneading and squishing and groping those tits until Steve’s blushing, his mouth open, eyes heavily lidded, sweat beading at his hairline, begging Bucky to move on and touch him somewhere else, anywhere else! His nipples swollen and so hard. Irrestable. Bucky would indulge him… sort of. He would move on. But he’d have to give the same thorough attention to his soft belly, his growing hips, his thick thighs, and his fat ass. His body deserves to be pleasured until he’s out of his mind.

When Steve’s loose and warm, they’re hanging out in some back-alley sports bar in Brooklyn for a game, watching the feed on TV, downing beers and greasy bar food with Sam and some other guys from the VA, and a sip goes down the wrong pipe so Steve has to pound his chest with a closed fist, ending up not coughing but belching loudly. For everyone else, the sound is covered by the rowdy cheers filling the crowded, dimly lit space. But not for Bucky. For Bucky, Steve is the only thing in focus. Steve, with his looser fit shirt disguise, blending in, his baseball cap tugged down low on his forehead, shading his eyes, his beard grown out, thick, and… Bucky can’t take it. His body. The way his belly scrunches up when he sits down, bulging out further. The way his throat moves when he chugs from a long-necked bottle. The way his pecs jiggle when he jumps up excitedly, cheering loudly, and the similar way his belly wobbles at the same time. The way he groans at the end of his beer burp, voice rough from yelling all night and soaked in hoppy, malty richness. The way his thighs spread out over his bar stool, expanding, stressing the seams of his jeans. He’s taking up so much space with his broad shoulders, excitable hand gestures as he talks, and his manspreading. Yet, it’s still not enough. His thighs fill out his tight, dark-wash denim so well that even when he’s manspreading, his thighs still touch. Bucky aches to curl up in his lap and kiss him, feeling his beard tickling his face. He wants the heat of that big, big body underneath him. He wants to feel the hot line of his erection when he grinds down into him - their stomachs pressed together, Steve’s heavy with bloating, greasy, fattening bar appetizers.

Bucky’s spank bank is over-fucking-flowing as Steve starts putting on weight and if Bucky didn’t know better, he would think Steve is doing it to him on purpose, teasing him, trying to get him to jump his bones 😏

[branches-and-thorns]

Listening to Epic on shuffle P2

Because there’s a second power cut!

This time I’m listening to a playlist of mine that has some covers included.

11:44am: Open Arms! My light just came on for 2 seconds and scared the shit outta me (it’s off again now). I’m vibing why is Polites’s part so good—

11:47am: MUTINY GODDAMNIT. IMMEDIATELY GETTING WHIPLASH. God this song is amazing tho. Armando Julián’s singing is top tier. AND JORGE IS GREAT AS ALWAYS. THE SINGING THE MUSIC I. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

11:54am: RUTHLESSNESS! It’s the Annapantsu cover but god it’s good and I am VIBING so much rn. I also think I should draw one of my OCs (Vivienne) with this song. Or Kore, actually. Idk I’ll decide when I can actually do animatics.

11:59am: JUST A MAN! Gonna zone out and think about OCs (Lucius) for a second. Okay now I have a non OC art idea.

12:02pm: SCYLLA! Pretty voices for the win! Gonna ignore the insane whiplash I’m getting today and just vibe with the voice. Actually listening to it the second half of this song would be great to draw Lacey to.

12:05pm: DONE FOR! 12pm is just murder girl hour I guess. God I love this song tho. Honestly the Circe saga is probably my favourite overall. Like I like Monster the most but if I had to add all their scores up the Circe Saga would win.

12:05pm: Warrior of the Mind, Caleb Hyles singing Athena and Annapantsu singing Odysseus. I haven’t heard this cover in a while so I’m just gonna vibe. Okay I forgot how much range Caleb has this is great.

12:07pm: No Longer You, Lydia the Bard. This cover sounds kind of…tragic? To me? Idk if you get it you get it I guess.

12:14pm: There are Other Ways! This really is girl’s hour wow— last time I talked about the tapping beat reminding me of a dance scene so I can’t talk about that so I will talk about the characters I mentioned then until the songs end. Nobles in a fantasy autocracy, sirens, friends to enemies, shared crush, severe violence issues, hypocrisy, and frankly I should draw them with the ‘no I’m not a player I’m a puppeteer’ line. AND TIME.

12:17pm: SURVIVE! Girls hour is over sadly. So funny story when the new versions got released I switched the versions over in my playlists planning to check them out after listening to the thunder saga and then had to leave home due to noise and forgot about it. So the first time I heard this song it was on shuffle on the Millia playlist and the squelch made me JUMP.

12:23pm: Warrior of the Mind, Annapantsu singing Athena, Caleb Hyles singing Odysseus. The girls are back and I’m gonna vibe again!

12:26pm: The Horse and the Infant. Okay I’m gonna vibe for the first half and cry for the second. ZEUS PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GODS. FUCK. OFF.

12:39pm: (took a break to get water and check on the electrics. Still nothing!) Full Speed Ahead! No thoughts just vibes.

12:42pm: The Underworld! I am preparing tissues. However I am also just. Vibing to the music. God the music in this whole musical is AMAZING. OKAY I CAN DO THIS. OKAY I DID IT BACK TO VIBEY MUSIC.

12:46pm: No Longer You, Caleb Hyles covering. I have listened to this one a lot and the ending goes off the rails so looking forward to that. Beginning to wonder what Epic would look like as an stage production. OKAY THIS IS THE BEST BIT!!

12:49pm: RUTHLESSNESS! See I think this version would be good for a Cain animatic because that bastard gets PISSED. Blind fury isn’t a Vivienne thing, but Cain? YES.

12:53pm: MONSTER! God. Favourite song. Hands down. Part of this is for sentimental reasons I mentioned last time but a lot is just that I feel like it really suits one of my blorbos and I really think I should draw him with this song. Especially considering the different reactions from the rest of the leadership…hm. Thoughts.

12:57pm: DIFFERENT BEAST OH MY. Okay so last time I was beginning to have oc thoughts about this song and it relates to the same oc I associate Monster with. It’s not even the revolution routes that triggered this it’s the siren route. Aka the one time Lucius went too far for THORN. I should draw it.

13:07pm: THUNDER BRINGER! God I swear I have the first minute of this song committed to memory. I think that’s slightly concerning. I might have slightly hyperfixated on the song while doing a very difficult art piece shortly after it came out. Okay gonna cry now.

13:12pm: MY GOODBYE! God this also carries a lot of OC associations, and it was really early in these characters development, so it stuck. Neither of them are gods so there’s that, but just…the I’m left to deal with the strain bit. THEM. AND ALSO OUCH. I am absolutely going to draw them to this song when I can draw things to songs.

13:16pm: WOULDNT YOU LIKE! I should draw this to SOMEONE in my catalogue but like. Who. I’m not getting any immediate ideas. I should think about this a bit. TBD!

Gonna wrap up there before my data runs out!

[drivestraight]

Omg hi so I read your newest fic which was so good, I’m a very casual Landoscar enjoyer but I like how your portray them, specially after Hungary!

I also read anatomy of a joke for the first time and omg it was so good, one of those fics that you read and you know what’s going on is a train wreck but you are oddly enjoying it even though you shouldn’t

This max had so many layers I was desperately craving to peal back, especially every time the fact that he had a gf was brought up, I would kill to know if Kelly really gave the thumbs up for all that mess. He is also very funny in here like damn I respect you for somehow always win despite everyone else losing their minds around you.

Lando…everytime he appeared I felt like I was that friend that he never listened to when they told him his man ain’t shit, probably what oscar was at some level lol. I like the vagueness around what are his true feelings regarding oscar and max, at some points I was convinced he was actually in love with max and at other I doubted everything.

Prayers for oscar, i was yelling at my screen for him to dip out of that mess and save himself, I wonder what happened after the last scene with max

Anyways I like your writing and I will be reading the rest of your fics! Also I kept wondering about why the title was “anatomy of a joke” and after thinking about it I think I got it lol

thank you so much! i obviously don't write landoscar that much dsjf;lkdfjsa and it's more of a new thing i'm doing on a whim so i'm happy you like how i write them!

and YEAH haha with anatomy of a joke i knew that there was no way i could introduce people to it fairly... you just have to jump right in... and it takes you places... i remember finally reaching austria and it was like. hehe. This is where it goes off the rails. it was supposed to be so much lighter but then it just progressed the way it did, and i liked how it was turning out, so then i just went with it! happy it turned out well :)

and yeah like. one thing i was trying Not to do was overexplain anything or belabor the point. keep things a little unsaid and let people intuit what they wanted/read between the lines and interpret it the way they wanted, but also leaving enough space/intrigue that you felt compelled enough to like, think about it. what it means, etc.

the girlfriend mentions were important... is it really purely casual on max's side? no feelings just friendship handjobs etc etc. but there is the weird possessiveness and needing to take up every space he shares with oscar/remind him that lando is his, etc. but yeah god he really was just. reading the room but also ignoring all of the signs and being like. So you want a threesome tonight. at every change he got 😭😭 love this guy

and exactly with lando... does he like max? eh. idk. it means something to him, though. waves hand vaguely weird intimacy issues. we gotta keep it semiotic. all the signs are there but if it's in a language you can't decipher, you're just left staring at it wondering what it all means, re: what oscar was going through the whole time, while also trying to tell himself he didn't care/give off the air that he didn't care, when he's had a flame for lando for like 6 years. fun little topsy turvy moment to me to write, that flashback.

and after that last scene with max he went back to his hotel room and Wallowed. I think. maybe. <3

it's called anatomy of a joke because... well... oscar's the joke...

if i do end up writing lando pov, the "joke" will become clearer. idk if i will, even though it's pretty planned out rn, but on the off chance that i do end up writing it, i'll keep lando's side of things a secret... get back to me in like a month on this...

anywayyyyy thank you thank you! i always love to get little messages like these - ik i don't reply to ao3 comments really, because it gets rly overwhelming at times, but i always read everything people comment/send me on tumblr about my fics, and i really appreciate it all! keeps me feeling encouraged to write more. tytyty

[zafiiwho]

𝔀𝓮𝓽 𝓭𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓶𝓼🔥🔞

𝕡𝕒𝕚𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤 : 𝕙𝕖𝕖𝕤𝕖𝕦𝕟𝕘 𝕏 𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕖𝕣

——————————————————————————

heeseung POV

“ahh I’m finally done from work. so tiring , I miss y/n - so I’d better rush home” heeseung stretched as he unlocked his car .

end of POV

[ time check - 10:30 pm ]

“i have been waiting for him - it’s been almost 2 hours .. I think I should go to sleep . What if he comes at 1am :( im sleepy so I shouldn’t waste my time waiting for him” you said madly, as u lied down on bed.

me and heeseung were a new married couple and this was an arrange marriage and you wished that you could have married jungwon, the love of ur life .. but sadly , your mafia dad insists that you should marry heeseung as he was strong and a literal workaholic.. I mean he earns a lot so I wouldn’t mind. But I really miss being with jungwon. Me and him lasted for almost 10 years ! but my dad messed everything up and it was pretty upset because we love each other a lot and I had to marry heeseung. I mean I wouldn’t mind because we are compatible in zodiac and life path number wise . Sooo I guess it’s alright 🤷‍♀️.

- 20 minutes later -

hee POV

“I’m finally HOME! can’t wait to rest 💤”

i entered home and when I walked into the room , I saw y/n fast asleep. Poor girl must have been too tired waiting for me. I quickly got changed and sat on the bed , beside her while using my phone before being asleep. That’s when….

end of POV

——————————————————————————

I was already in a deep state of sleeping- when suddenly I had a dream about heeseung fucking me aggressively. I let out a soft moan. Everything felt so real !

[ what the dream was about ]: I was simply cooking for lunch and heeseung had his day off! so he was up in our bedroom doing some paper work while I was cooking sumi ramen. As he was doing his work , he came down because of the fresh smell of ramen and he was looking forward to eating it since he loves ramen a lot. Finally I had finished cooking and was at the kitchen counter , resting but I was standing cuz my thighs were hurting a lot. Suddenly a pair of hands were wrapped around my waist.

“bb? that you?” you questioned

“shush babygirl. Daddy is really needy rn . So do u wanna get railed baby?” He said in a Low tone.

ok ngl . This man always turns me on whenever he groans or talks in a Low tone and he knows that he sounds hot but just ignores the fact and focus to turn me on. without letting u answer , he started to attack your neck with hickies , u let out a moan and daddy hee got hard just by hearing your desperate moan.

He placed u on the kitchen counter table and took ur pants off with his teeth and threw it aside. He ate you out, hungrily . U started getting more wet and grabbed a fistful of his hair as he inserted his tongue in u. You were a moaning mess , but he wanted u to moan louder . So without hesitation, he took his pants out and inserted his erection in u .

“oh fuck…” you moaned loud as it was a sudden hit

He started off slowly and you were enjoying it lowkey , u kept ur eyes shut and gained balance with ur elbows and u leaned back , giving him more leeway to fuck u deeper

he starts to fuck you faster - he tried to find for ur sweet spot to abuse it.

“O” u opened ur mouth as he finally found ur sweet spot

“moan louder baby, let the neighbours hear u” heeseung shouted as he was fucking u harshly on ur sweet spot and was fucking at that exact place just to hear ur loud moans.

“FUCK ! DADDY FASTER, OH GOSH” you shouted

He slapped u and opened ur legs wider so that he could thrust faster in u . You both started sweating and u kept moaning uncontrollably. He bite ur lips and squeezed ur thighs as he was fucking you mercilessly .

“DADDY IM ABOUT TO-” you screamed

“let it out baby” he groaned

He covered your mouth with his hands as he inserted a finger in ur mouth and making u suck it . He went faster and without saying a word , you came . But he wasn’t done .. he put u in doggy and fucked u harshly as he pulled your hair and started growing more in u. He pulled ur body up so that ur back was touching his chest and gave hard thrusts. You were crying and begging him to finish. As you said , he finally came - a lot of cum was ejected in u and u let out a moan .

He gave u a kiss and that’s when…

[ end of dream ]

————————————————————————————————————————

heeseung POV : I see . This girl is having dreams of me fucking her. Alright den I shall do what i am suppose to be doing to her rn ….

he wakes u up and u were all In a mess , you were even wet down there .. hee looked at u and started with a deep kiss …

——————————————————————————

OKAY HELO HELO! I am done with this heeseung smut <3 was also requested ‼️, drop by ur request yah :)) saranghaeeee :D

he is a qt and he knows it 😩🤞❗️

[speliviya]

So you’re telling me…. Their most successful ship, the most developed love story… they decided to make one half of it an antagonist in the others story as relationship drama because apparently a college athlete and journalism college intern couldn’t POSSIBLYYYY be together healthily without their dream careers conflicting..? Like the complete insult to our intelligence with some bulllshit ass last minute fight that was waaaay too premature for 18 year olds to even be dealing with anyway. Well, actually not even because ASHER’S career goals are more conflicting for Spencer than Liv’s really is. They’ve let them fight and make up. They didn’t even allow the story to go in the direction of making Asher a villain in Spencer’s story despite him literally using personal information against him to have an advantage on him. Like that’s actual natural conflict and even the clear wrongness of that situation, the audience STILL took that man’s side. But with Liv, the one person who has alwaaaaaays had his back, is now turning around angry at Spencer for being in the way of her job????? Besides 4.19, where was the build up of Liv being increasingly annoyed with Spencer about the arguments they were having. She literally told him in 4.17 she wasn’t going anywhere sooooo what’s this 2 episodes later where she is absolutely fed up and can’t do ‘it’ anymore? What even is IT. 2 days later and I honestly still don’t get her point. She completely ignored every line about not communicating and instead proceeded to be upset that he didn’t validate that she was right. Like okay, whatever stance she has is already odd and ooc anyway but they could’ve at least let her speak very clearly about what she was saying instead of speaking in haiku poems. I’m so frustrated that a character this fandom all knows WELL and loves are confused with her behavior and dialogue. At what point did the switch come where her advancement in her EARLY career was more important to her than fighting for her healthy relationship and partner who would quite literally move the world for her. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t believe she should sacrifice her dreams for him but their writing this like that’s basically the conflict rn. It would be more in character for her to say I don’t want you working with shady and evil people because that ultimately affects your game but no, she’s saying “I can’t miss another big opportunity to advance my career because of you”. (……..) so is this tension coming from Spencer about to fight Wade over her? Like I just am so frustrated that they really are making her completely disregard Spencer’s perspective and feelings in all of this. Some people are just like “they’ll be fine, they probably won’t actually break up” well sure, maybe, but I’m more concerned for the HEALTH of this relationship. It’s not looking good at all. It’s making her look completely selfish and all consumed without her even fighting for this man and what they’ve built their relationship to be over the last year. This is not an authentic crossroads for them, this is forced drama that ‘had to happen’ to show that they’re not perfect and what balancing ‘careers’ look like for them. Spencer seemed to have figured it out well but they have her spiraling off the rails. And again, fair if that’s just where she’s at mentally but why couldn’t the root of the spiral be from work and not tension with Spencer over work she chose to do in his career field. She’s quite literally stepping at every turn to write about topics in HIS field and getting upset that he’s in her way. Like HE’S the roadblock. Well duh hun! It’s HIS TEAM!!!!

I mean on top of all this… because of her story on Wade she inadvertently almost got her and her friends killed by the SWAT team…… and now she’s teaming up with the same sociopath that almost got them killed/arrested to take down a GROWN man with even more power than the idiot who framed all of her friends just a night ago. WHERE IS THE LINE!!! Trust me, idgaf about Garrett. He probably should get taken down and exposed but she’s SO pressed to get her name on an article that she’s willing to risk that all over again just to be right?! It’s one thing when SHE was getting slut shamed in online posts, when SHE was receiving weird calls and threats but it’s a whooooole other clusterfuck where your actions in some capacity led to MILITARY GRADE WEAPONRY being pointed at your brother, boyfriend, and friends HEADS!!! And STILL the privilege of Coop working for her mom who was the literal DA of Los Angeles County got them out of that situation. Where does NK’s social justice warrior agenda END?! Destroying my favorite character for WHAT!!! I mean and the worst part about all of this is that it will all be wrapped up in a pretty nice bow because this show doesn’t even know how to commit to the catastrophes they write.

Sorry I’m just beyond frustrated with these writers more than anything else. I’m still going to be seated come fall lmao but wow! All of this roundabout nonsense just to avoid cliches. We could be joking it up about baby Crenshawn after the cliffhanger revealed a pregnancy scare arc for Spelivia but no, I’m fighting for my life trying to make sense of nonsensical ass plot lines. Why is the logic for cliffhangers to do something that will piss us OFF and not make us feel excited, intrigued, and on the edge of our seats. I’m not on the edge of my seat to find out whether my favorite ship will break up or not because I’ve already seen some of the damage done and I have little faith that the writing will redeem it in a way that does both of them justice.

[shobioo]

Plus One ❀ 021// Do you love me?

❀START || PREVIOUS || NEXT

You and Tsukishima stood outside away from the current reception that was taking place. The night was still as you looked up at the sky, the both of you seemed to act oblivious to what had happened at the pool. Pretending everything was normal, though sometimes it wasn’t. Distant silence that used to be easy to fill seemed a lot harder now, as you wondered how he would react to the certain sentence. You look up at the moon and the millions of stars that accompanied it.

Tsukishima didn’t seem to bother to try and break the silence.

“So, what’s your best man speech sounding like?” You ask breaking the silence and looking at him. He shrugged, “To be honest I might not even go.”

“What? Why not? It would be our last wedding going together. And we agreed we shouldn’t do this alone.” Your face twisted in confusion as you stared at him. “We never talked about it. But how come you never want to.” Kei sighed, “I just don’t want to think about him getting married.”

“Why not?”

“Cause I just don’t.” He replied bluntly, making you lean back slightly. “Sorry, I was just wondering.” You wave your hands in defense. To be honest, Tsukishima didn’t have a valid enough reason on why he didn’t want to be his brothers’ best man, he wasn’t still bitter from what had happened between them when they were kids… (Well, sometimes he wasn’t and sometimes he was). “Well, if you still go…I’ll always go with you, so you don’t need to go alone.” You smiled at him, you seemed to stare at him with loving eyes. You stared at him like that each morning you both spent together, and it filled him with guilt.

“(Y/N) I have a question.”

“Nah, I’m not getting tattoos with you anymore since you didn’t wanna do it last time.” You joke. Kei would have laughed if his question weren’t serious, you looked as he didn’t give a reaction. “Oh? You are asking seriously? Uhm okay. What’s wrong?” You turn to lean against the railing, you watched as he hesitated slightly, which was the first time you’ve seen in a while for him to do. He then looked at you and you slightly tilt your head, mouth open to ask him ‘what was it?’ but you were stopped.

“Do you love me?”

You close your mouth quickly. You face seemed to flush at the sudden question, “Uhm? Where did that come from?” You slightly shout, as you pushed yourself away from the rail. “Are you seriously asking me?” And by his blank expression you know he was being profoundly serious. All in all, this was a conversation you hadn’t expected…nor wanted to have. “You could say no.” He stated turning back to look at the night scenery before him.

You chew your lip, why was this all happening? He couldn’t have known what you meant at the pool, and if he had why didn’t he ask before? Questions swarmed your head before you sigh defeatedly.

“Yeah, I love you. Why? Do you love me?”

The silence was more than enough for you to understand. “So…no?” You ask, “I don’t know.” You nodded a little. “It’s a no, Tsukishima look it’s fine.”

It wasn’t, you were lying. And it was noticeable too, “It’s not like we talked about it…I don’t even like care.” You try waving it off and ignoring your eyes that seemed to swell with tears. “(Y/N), I – I just don’t know.”

Tsukishima didn’t know. Why, he didn’t know like why he didn’t know why he didn’t want to be a best man. You sniffled, “What are you scared?” You asked, and his eyes slightly widened at that. Maybe, he was.

Then you continued, you were so desperate to know why. “Kei, I don’t know what you’re so afraid of. But you can give this a chance and I’m not asking you to move in or marry me. This could be good, what do you need can’t you just— “

“I can’t!” He yells at you. Your eyes were wide, and you looked down, rubbing your eyes. “I don’t want to hurt yo-.” Your eyes snapped at him as you glared slightly. “Don’t say that to me, because right now you’re hurting me more than you understand.” Your voice broke as you glare at him.

“I want to love you, you deserve it. You do. Just not from me.” Tsukishima tells you. You bite your lip, your heart felt like it had shattered. “I’m right here, you don’t need to be afraid. Because though it sounds so stupid, I think I’m different. I’m standing right here, ready to love you and you can’t- “Your voice trailed off as you hiccup and glared at him. His features were soft as he stared back at the pain in your face, he was about to say something, but you quickly shake your head.

“Don’t. Don’t fucking say you’re sorry. Because you aren’t. I’m…I’m going home.” Tears streamed down your face and that was the last image Tsukishima had of you engraved in his mind as you stormed off.

❀) IM SORRY. I hope you all can forgive me 🥲 I’m writing my notes apology rn...HWJDIXK...I’m hurt no wonder word didn’t want y’all to see this-

❀) we’re super close to the end of this, I hadn’t even noticed - thank you all so much for the support this far :))

❀) I’m sorry about the last two days, but I’m happy to say we’re back on track now!!! ^^ and I’ve reached like 209 followers and I cannot thank you all enough :> you all mean the world to me!

(TAGLIST): @queerys-blog @knucklestuff @masaquette @ashtheticals @lucyheartfilias-wife @yongboxerrr @1-800-simpingcowbaby @fourcansofpringles @obsidianandturquoise @fuckinuchihas @shawtiie @tsukkis-little-platonic-whore @cvlliesstuff @mirikusashes @haikyuubabygirl @kac-chowsballs @saikishairclip @bluefaeriefury @owlnymph @hisokaoncrack @so-lo-stuff @thechaosoflonging @backwards-bun @ifuknowmenowudont @losertsukki @ryusex-wife @oreogutz @m01k @mer-majesty @definitely-yours @levylovegood @devilkittymusic @hogwarts--imagines @kokogxddess @tanakasimpcorner

[tofuwhale]

Genshin Impact Boy Headcanons!! [Kaeya, Childe, Zhongli, Xiao & Diluc]

Me and my friend (Tofu) decided to make a bunch of headcanons while we were hyped up about the boys!!!! Please excuse our fangirling lol they’re mainly SFW with a little NSFW mentions in some

I might write one-shots based on these headcanons in the future lol, we’re also open to more headcanon prompts/characters so please leave us an ask!

Enjoy <3 

-🐋

Type of Tiktok boys they would be

Kaeya

Kaeya would own a roleplaying account with the subtitles and shit where it’s like ‘POV: you’re on a date with me’

Smooth asf, actually makes you blush when you watch his tiktoks

Diluc

He would have an account where he’s just mixing cocktails and showing off his skills as a bartender in front of a window

Zhongli

Fashion icon asf

Mainly formal fashion like suits and shit 

He’s confused by the comments because they all say “rail me” and Childe thinks it’s hilarious so he just doesn’t tell Zhongli what it means

Childe

WHITE BOY 

STRAIGHT TIKTOK 

he probably dances like noah beck

Xiao

Bitch doesn't know tiktok 

OR he’s the anonymous type, he uses his mask to hide his identity and shows his hands only 

Comments are horny 

You bake a chocolate cake for your best boy!

Kaeya

So sweet would appreciate the cake

Tells you to close your eyes to spoon feed you asf 

You start blushing and he laughs at you for being flustered so easily

Ends up plugging ur air holes with the cake bc he smashed it to your face

Runs off laughing as you run after him

Diluc

Just thanks you and eats the cake 

If it turns out bad, he would ask to help you next time OR he just wouldn't say anything and smile at you painfully as he eats it 

Offers to get a cook to make you something as well like a true gentleman but you refuse

Zhongli

Confused by the concept of chocolate cake, but tries it anyways to make you happy

Don’t get too happy, he’ll criticise your baking so hard till you have tears spewing out your eyes

Childe

LAUGHS AND SMILES His smile is so bright it blinds you 

HEAD PATS!!!!!

Calls you a ‘good girl’

“Let’s eat it together, okay?”

Xiao 

Says to you he doesn’t like chocolate when you give him it, but eats it when you leave anyways

Asks you to make more, not directly but hints it out later like

“I’m in the mood for some cake rn” 

A total tsundere 

What they’d be like if they’re jealous over you, or if they would even get jealous at all

Kaeya

He’d tease you about it but probably be hurt on the inside 

“Woooow, is this your new boyfriend? Personally I think you could do much better,” and then winks at you

You’d pay for it in bed ;) 

Diluc and Zhongli

They’d pretend not to be bothered, having trust in you and the relationship but would also secretly maybe ask around the city about who the dude you’re talking to is 

Childe

SUPER JEALOUS!!! He’d make sure to let the other guy know that you’re his by hugging you really close and kissing you while the other guy is around 

Maybe a little bit overbearing at times but he’s yours and you’re his so it doesn’t matter <3 

Xiao

Wouldn’t know the concept of jealousy since he’s been alone all his life but he’d feel uncomfy seeing you talk to another person

He’d probably furrow his brows, pout and walk back to his balcony

Being a sad puppy, arms crossed and resting on the rails waiting for you to come back

What they would do if you got a cold and had to stay in bed

Kaeya

Teases you calling you stupid and laughs at you when you say it’s because you tried to pet a cryo slime 

But he makes sure to take care of your commissions and work at the Knights’ while you’re sick 

Diluc

Would personally see to it that you’re taken well care of at the winery

Would walk into the bedroom while he thinks you’re asleep and pet your head and tell you cute stories about his day so that you have good dreams

Zhongli

Silently makes you soup but fails immensely 

you drink it anyways to be nice

Would crawl into the sheets with you while you're asleep to cuddle and then catch your cold

Childe

Holds your hands while you’re in bed and makes sure you get enough sleep, is actually concerned as hell and won’t make any jokes about it 

Won’t be able to do any work or anything, he’d be worrying if you’re ok or not

SOOOOo happy when you’re feeling better but gives you a whole lecture about not staying out so late when it’s cold

Xiao

HE’D MAKE YOU ALMOND TOFU with soup on the side perhaps

Tells you to be more careful

Runs his hands through your hair when you’re about to sleep

First “I love you”

Kaeya

He’d teasingly say “i love you” 

But he says it all the time so you can’t tell whether he’s being serious or not

Would let you suffer alone trying to figure out his intentions when he definitely knows he loves you

Diluc

He’d say it while you’re bedridden with your cold, thinking you’re asleep

It’s because he’s too afraid that one day he’ll eventually lose you 

Zhongli

He never actually says it but shows it through his actions, like buying you plushies and sweets when you’re sad 

He uses your mora to buy the plushies and sweets but you don’t really care anyways because it’s the gesture that counts!!

You know he loves you anyways so he never has to say it <3

Childe

He’d just say it out of nowhere dead serious while you two are goofing around during a pillow fight

You’re really shocked but before you can say anything back he throws another pillow at your face while laughing

‘Pretends’ it never happened after but gets soft when you finally say it back

Xiao

He’d confess during the lantern festival

You’d both be watching the lantern’s

While you’re watching, Xiao would turn to you to see your reaction

Smiles slightly before whispering “i love you”

WOULD REACH FOR YOUR HAND AFTER THAT and squeeze it bc he doesn’t want to lose you either by him dying or you leaving him

The perfect date

Kaeya

Sex. period.

Just a lot of sex like a sex marathon because he loves seeing you being pleasured by him

TONS OF CUDDLING AFTER!!! And sleeping!!! Aftercare yes. 

Diluc

FIGHTING TOGETHER 

He’d think doing things you both love together is best date anyone could do

Y’all have each others backs

Power couple

Zhongli

Shopping. Duh. Mister spends all his mora or wtv buying anything and everything he sees because he’s thinking of you while he buys them

When he runs out he asks for you to pay even though they’re gifts for you

He’s hilarious

Childe

Would be a fun date

Going to the beach to swim or an amusement park with a ferris wheel

The day would end with the two of you sitting on a bench eating ice cream together and he laughs when you get ice cream on your nose

Xiao

Would rather stay at home/hotel room and not get disturbed by anyone

Probably sleeping in because he’s always tired for having to fight nearby enemies

BREAKFAST IN BED!! The two of you eat almond tofu until you’re sick of it 

You drag him out of bed because you want to try to make almond tofu for fun

It tastes bad but you two have fun making it together and that’s what counts!!!!!

(Angst) What an argument with him is like/ What he’s like when you two are fighting or mad at each other

Kaeya 

Annoyed and passive aggressive as hell, probably makes a couple low blows while you’re fighting

He’d click his tongue while you’re running your mouth and leaves the room to let out some steam

Either by drinking and talking to Diluc (who doesnt listen)

Or he goes and fights some slimes

Diluc

He would ignore you until things reach a boiling point where one of you snaps and starts yelling

Busting your lungs out at each other screaming and yelling, you’re crying and both of you blame each other 

After you two get all your emotions out, you start crying and the both of you are emotionally vulnerable af

While you’re both in this state you have a conversation about what bothers each other in the relationship

Zhongli 

Both of you are stubborn as hell, and would refuse to apologize to each other despite knowing that you’re the one in the wrong

Childe has to be the one to get you two to talk to each other constructively about your issues 

Childe

You’d ignore each other for a bit but unlike Zhongli, Childe would probably apologise first because he feels bad and he’s too smart to lose you over a petty argument

The two of you would go over the argument again to sort it out properly and resolve the issue maturely  

Xiao

Silent while you yell at him, just stares at you with an indecipherable emotion on his face 

He just nods and accepts everything you have to say, knowing you need to get it off your chest

Feels like he messed up big time since this is his first real relationship, and goes to the inn’s balcony to think about it

After you yell at him you feel awful and go to apologize

[jayflrt]

this IS LONGER THAN I THOUGHT 😭😭

my studying is long gone and I’m here reading a-list I don’t even know how to being how much I like it no I LOVE IT. the way they had the tension from the fucking stART LIKE URGHHHHHDHNDJDMD yes beautiful.

“I know you do, princess,” Jongseong replied, a smirk tugging at his lips. “You’ve always loved being on Gossip Girl’s A-List.”

oh to be called princess by him 💳💳🗣🗣 I’m not even a fan of pet names but if it was him sign the fuck up.

I LOVE JAYS CHARACTER SO MUCH YES !!! i want a best friend like him ??? no imagine jay as your bestie like it would be so cool. random drives or just randomly spoiling you. he would be such a great listener and giving advice like omg !!! THE HUGS HE GIVES OR RANDOM KISSES. 🥴🤍 ALSO LIKE IMAGINE CALLING HIM AT NIGHT AND HE SINGS FOR YOU or talks about the most random thing at 3am on a school night AHHDINDKEKEK my guy friend could never 🙄 WAIT IM OFF TRACK I SWEAR THIS HAPPENS WHEN IM TALKING ABOUT JAY 😭😭. no i literally re read it cuz I wanna show my favorite parts, and like, how am I supposed to even supposed to take few parts from the whole masterpiece???

ok enough talk of jay, let me give some spotlight to my girl. pls I love her character so much urgh!!!! like she is kinda spoiled but she is considerate of things nice of you and thank you for having an idea of jay actually being head over heels for you. she gave off a lot of girl boss vibes minus her chasing hoon. stop flexing you got the PARK JONGSEONG wrapped around your fingers we KNOW 🤧🥲🤚🏽🤚🏽 give me a chance ig or something I can be your maid thank you 😊 ALSO STOP CHASING MEN THAT DONT LOVE YOU BAVK LIKE JAY PLS BABE !!! no I REALLY LOVE HER CHARACTER ITS SO NICE ?!??!! You SHOULD HAVE CONFESSED SOONER LOVE 🗣🗣🗣🗣 ngl this part made me laugh a little

“I’ll bite you,” you taunted. “Let’s see if you can even do that with my cock down your throat.”

ok I’m big curious but do you write these filthy part and be like damn,,,,, I just really wrote that, woah that’s cool 👍🏽👍🏽 or something but I’m curious what’s your thought process after writing any story like, do you stare at what you wrote and be like “damn that was something” and ignore your assignments???? the songs gave more feels to it like sexy. i loved how you described all the scenes so well and gave the feel to imagine it like hdjdjdk. maybe we deserve a small bit of jay and sunghoon “fight” or whatever. don’t you think 🤔🤔

OH MY GOSH 😭😭😭 YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH IM GUSHING OVER THIS ENTIRE ASK RN LIKE ??? YOU WROTE ALL THAT FOR ME:?;9;8 😭🥺💖

thank you so much for reading angel :(( and ditching your studying to read 😭😭 i’m honored BUT ALSO ITS OKAY U CAN READ AFTER STUDYING 👉👈 and pls i’m so glad you could pick up on the sexual tension i was hoping i wrote it well :’)) AND THE FACT THAT YOU TOOK THE TIME TO PICK OUT A QUOTE YOU LIKED ILL JUST CRY RN BYEE E 🏃‍♂️😭💝

sorry this is long i must read more this 😞

but pls i hate pet names myself but oh 2 have park jongseong call me princess 🧎‍♀️lord i’ve seen the things you’ve done for others 🙏

PLS IF JAY TREATED ME LIKE THAT AS MY BESTIE HE BETTER CUFF ME RIGHT AFTER BC THATS TOO BOYFRIEND FOR ME 🥸 but pls i would Love to have him be my bestie :((( like late night drives at night and getting food together and watching movies together <33 that’s how my friendship w my guy friend kinda is except i question his driving so midnight drives r me holding on for dear life 🤕 but it’s spooky szn now so my thoughts r simply best friend or boyfriend jay helping u hand out candy or watching horror movies together 😞😞 ITS OKAY MY THOUGHT OF TRAIN GOES OFF THE RAILS BC OF JAY TOO :’)) also you reread it 😭😭😭 i’m so touched rn oh my god 💗💗💗

AHHH IM SO GLAD YOU LIKED THE MC :’)) her character is very blair-esque in that she’s pretty self absorbed but the pedestal she holds herself at makes her just want to be loved bc it’s lonely at the top yk D; so that’s where she’s coming from with chasing after sunghoon (esp when she has that competitive nature and sees him so enamored by ningning). BUT THIS WAS SUCH SELF PROJECTION I JUST WANT JAY TO BE IN LOVE W ME 😞 in reality i am the one wrapped around his finger

LMAODJF MY SMUT DIALOGUE ALWAYS NEEDS HUMOR IN IT HERE AND THERE 💀💀 like is that sexy ?? maybe not but 😀 also OMG so i was kinda surprised by the turnout of my smut scene in this fic because i usually don’t write multiple orgasms (??) LMFOAJD BUT NO I GET MY WORK DONE 🤧 like yesterday i had finished my assignments due on that day and i had to wait at school for like 5 hours for a meeting so i sat down and just wrote :’)) the smut turned veryyyy self indulgement LOLL also it makes me so happy that you think my scenes are vivid ☹️💝 i draw a lot of inspiration from real life and i guess just have a good imagination LMAOAO so it’s p easy to write :’))

as for the sunghoon and jay fight :o i didn’t write it since the fic is from mc’s point of view and i didn’t want her intervening in their convo but the way i envisioned it was just sunghoon and him hanging out like they usually would, and then jay just dropped the bomb. sunghoon was just shocked, anger building up, but he knew jay’s feelings from before so he didn’t explode. the black eye was kind of provoked by jay, like him egging sunghoon on to just punch him, half for sunghoon to have an outlet for his anger and half for him to feel less guilty about his feelings for mc. afterward they would just laugh after their little fight and go back to talking about how they made mistakes in past relationships and should’ve been more communicative with each other :’)

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Would you like to elaborate on that dream?

Okay all I know is I went out with my sister but I live in an area that is borderline shady after dark. But my sister is an extrovert and she always collects friends so we were headed home but she had like six friends with us. She was going to catch the bus with them and Loki was just there. Like it felt like only I noticed.

Well I went to leave my sis at the stop with her pals and Loki's like I live around here, I'll walk you to your building. I was like nah bra, it's not far also I never mentioned my apartment. He didn't listen and followed me anyway.

Anyway, I closed the front door on him because it automatically locks. But I'm waiting for the elevator and look back and he's just standing on the other side of the clear door, watching, no emotion, just watching.

I get up to my floor at last and he comes around the corner and I try to close the door but the shoes keep rolling off the mat and keeping it from shutting all the way. I look up and he's right there, right in front of me but he can't enter.

He keeps asking to come in and I'm like dude my bf is literally snoring on the couch rn, go away. And so I finally get the door closed but I look out the peep hole and he just there. Just standing there.

I woke up my bf and he went to look and Loki was gone. So I was like right I'm checking the locks and we're going to bed.

I lay down and my bf passes right the fuck out. I look over at the window, it's beside our balcony but doesn't look onto it. I hear metal scraping.

I try to ignore it but can't sleep. I go out to look through the living room windows and Loki's on my balcony sitting in my patio chair, running his nails down the railing. Then suddenly he's looking on tapping on the window.

I fucked off into the bathroom and woke up.

[autisticshadowthehedgehog]

Filmverse!Knuckles is gonna be Tikal’s Little Brother and if he’s not I’m suing Sega

[ID: Two images; one of clipart of Knuckles the Echidna beside a poster for Sonic the Hedgehog (2020), and another from Sonic X of Knuckles and Tikal together while Tikal is injured. End ID.] 

Thankfully, this might be shorter than my last couple theory posts but unfortunately I am possibly more passionate about it because this could conceivably happen and if it doesn’t I don’t know what I’m gonna do. 

So in this theory, I will endeavor to prove these points:

Knuckles will very soon be present in the filmverse. 

In the Filmverse, Pachacamac (and by extention, Tikal) are no longer four-thousand years gone, but exist at the same time as Sonic.

Knuckles is going to be in this clan not just as any member, but as Tikal’s brother. 

We’re going off the rails and I’m going to tie this all in to the Chaos Emerald Filmverse theory. 

Who’s ready to go? Everything under the cut. 

1. Knuckles is Coming #2k22

[ID: Another edited photo, placing clipart of Knuckles beside a promotional photo for Sonic the Hedgehog (2020). End ID.] 

This will probably be a short section but... there’s no way Knuckles won’t be in the filmverse very soon. Likely, in the second fucking movie. 

Let’s start with the basics: Knuckles was originally going to be in the first movie, but was cut in order to better establish the Sonic vs Robotnik rivalry. Director Jeff Fowler made the following statement: 

“For this first film, we really were just looking at the 1991 game and just see where it all started and keep it simple…Just really try to nail Sonic and Robotnik and just set up their rivalry because you don’t…I mean, I love…There’s a lot of great characters in Sonic universe, but it’s the most important thing is just to get Sonic set up and just tell a little bit of an origin story with him, and just do it in a way that really makes everyone fall in love with him as a character and just be rooting for more.

And then, if all that goes well, then we can kind of open it up and bring in some of these other characters that fans know and love. And yeah, I mean, no one’s more excited than me to have that opportunity.”

[x]

As well as this, co-writer for the film, Josh Miller, has stated he really wants to bring in Knux. 

“I will only hint that we wanna bring in some of the other characters from the games. But, really, it’s all about Knuckles’ love.” [x]

Second, voice actors have, reportedly, already been considered for Knuckles’s voice, including Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. [x, x]

And third, Mushroom Hill. 

[ID: Two photos; one of the Mushroom Planet from Sonic the Hedgehog (2020). The second is a screenshot from Sonic & Knuckles, where Knuckles is running through Mushroom Hill. Both photos feature gigantic mushrooms resembling trees and an orange tint. End iD.]

The “Mushroom Planet” is a direct reference to the first level of Sonic & Knuckles. The first level of.... the game with Knuckles’s name in it. 

So, you wanna hear something funny? What’s the first thing Knuckles does in the game timeline? 

[ID: Screenshot from Sonic & Knuckles. Sonic is standing on the left side of the screen, beneath a mural of something holding an emerald towards something that looks like SuperSonic. On the right side of the screen is Knuckles, ready to fight Sonic. End ID.]

Well... Robotnik shows up, convinces him that Sonic and Tails are gonna try to steal his emerald, and sends him off to fight them. 

And where’s Robotnik at the end of the 2020 film?

[ID: Robotnik on the Mushroom Planet in Sonic the Hedgehog (2020). End ID.]

While the Mushroom Planet may not be where Angel Island is in filmverse, the direct reference would definitely generate fan attention. And it implies that Robotnik, wherever he is or is going, is headed towards Knuckles. And with the game inciting incident of Robotnik having Knuckles fight Sonic for him... well, wouldn’t that be a wild introduction? Especially for casual fans who don’t have Sonic Lore memorized and may not know that Knuckles was originally an antagonist/rival to Sonic. 

Oh, and there’s one more piece of evidence that Knuckles is gonna show up... the fact that his tribe already has. 

And among them, by the way, are Pachacamac and Tikal. 

2. Pachacamac and Tikal are no longer 4000 years old

So. Let’s talk about the opening scene of Sonic the Hedgehog (2020). As many of you have probably noticed, Sonic and Longclaw are attacked not just by any masked intruders, but by... the Knuckles Clan of Echidnas. 

And we’re sure they’re not any other clan, because they have the trademark Knuckled Gloves. 

[ID: Multiple gifs of the echidnas attempt to attack Longclaw and Baby Sonic. They are dressed in vaguely tribal wear, and have gloves featuring pointed knuckles, signifying them as the Knuckles Clan. End ID.] 

Now, that’s not evidence of Pachacamac/Tikal itself; we know the Knuckles Clan lasted at least long enough to spawn our Knuckles. What is evidence, however, is in the specific Echidna who shot Longclaw. 

[ID: Gif of the Echidna who shot Longclaw, isolated in the frame. End ID.] 

Look familiar?

[ID: The echdina who shot Longclaw in the 2020 film next to a render of Pachacamac. The mystery echidna’s helmet has the same forehead markings as Pachacamac, along with a design that looks like his mustache. End ID.]

And fun fact: this isn’t me reaching for once. This was confirmed by Tyson Hesse, film character designer and savior of Sonic, on his twitter. 

[ID: Tweet from Tyson Hesse, showing the pictures of the Echidna and Pachacamac. He says, “Late to the #sonicwatchparty but this is an easter egg I haven’t seen many people catch.” End iD.]

Pachacamac is canonically in Sonic 2020. As director Jeff Fowler has said he believes Sonic as ~13 during the events of the film, we could say he’s about three years old in that intro. And we know this because it is specified specifically that the main timeline takes place ten years after the prologue. 

[ID: Screenshot from Sonic the Hedgehog (2020), the first shot following the logo. It is a landscape shot of a street in the middle of a green field, and the caption reads, Green Hills Montana: Ten Years Later. End ID.]

Meaning... Pachacamac was alive ten years before the film takes place. Quite the departure from the four-thousand year time jump in the gameverse. Seeing as Pachacamac is alive so close to this timeline, we can reasonably assume that Tikal is, too- she’s his teenaged daughter, canonically ~14 when she is turned into a spirit, which would put her as solidly alive during this timeline. 

...wanna know who else would be alive in this timeline? 

Knuckles, who is only a year older than Sonic. 

And, um, obviously a member of the Knuckles Clan. 

3. Where is Knuckles in this Filmverse Canon?

Okay “Knuckles” is going to stop sounding like a word so can we just call the Knuckles Clan the KC rn? okay? Okay. 

Knuckles is canonically a year older than Sonic- listed as 16 while Sonic is 15. So if Sonic’s alive, Knuckles is alive. Basic logic there. 

In the gameverse, Knuckles’s backstory is as thus, paraphrased from Sonic Wiki:

Knuckles was born and raised alone on Angel Island as the last surviving member of the Knuckles Clan, a long-lost race of echidnas devoted to protecting the Master Emerald from being abused. However, Knuckles’s own past was a mystery to him; he knew nothing how he came to be and believed himself to be the last of his kind entirely. The one thing he did know was that he had always been living on his island, protecting the Master Emerald. Knuckles knew from an innate knowledge that his duty was his fate, and he was content with that.

While we can’t expect his backstory to stay exactly the same, seeing as Sonic now has a dead owl mom and knows how to Fortnite dance, but Knuckles’s backstory does fuel a lot of his character and decisions in the games. Here are what I believe to be the two main points of this backstory:

Knuckles is, or at least believes himself to be, the last member of his race 

Knuckles considers it his sacred duty to guard the Master Emerald 

[ID: Screencap from Sonic X of Knuckles the Echidna holding the Master Emerald above his head. End ID.]

Now... if Sonic was three during that backstory, the KC was around at least when Knuckles was about four. Most children don’t develop long-term memories til then, but if 3yo Sonic could remember his backstory in Green Hills near-perfectly, then clearly mobians are a bit different. We can reasonably assume that Knuckles would then remember at least part of his tribe or family, so that’s a definite change. 

Thing is, what would be the reason for this change? Even ignoring Pachacamac, it was definitely intentional for the clan attacking Longclaw and Sonic to be the KC, which does change quite a bit of Knuckles’s backstory. Which isn’t a problem, you see- it’s a drastic change, but character changes aren’t bad if there’s a reason behind them. 

So what would be the reason for Knuckles having memories of his tribe? 

Well... how easy would it be, then, to get that Sonic Adventure flashback via Knuckles instead of a glowing ball of Tikal/Navi? 

[ID: Screencap from Sonic Adventure, showing Knuckles the Echidna staring down Chaos and the glowing ball of light that symbolizes Tikal. They are standing in front of the emerald shards. End ID.]

Would be an easy way to get any chaos emerald/Master Emerald exposition out of the way, as well as establish some basic and early Sonic Lore- Chaos, echidnas, chao. And if Knuckles, um, remembers his entire race being massacred by an elder god?? That would definitely affect him in a way that he’d consider protecting the Master Emerald, the controller of the power Chaos used to do such a thing, a duty for himself. 

And... what would be the best way to get that backstory out? 

4. Knuckles is Tikal’s Baby Brother

Here’s the thing- the KC citizens don’t seem to know much about what’s going on outside of Pachacamac’s orders. From talking to them in Sonic Adventure flashbacks, we can see they’re quite a bit... confused, I think is the best way to put it. 

[ID: Dialogue screenshots from Sonic Adventure that I had to nab from a Game Grumps video because nobody else had these online. The echidnas say, “The daughter? I saw her in front of the shrine.”, “Well... I.... I just can’t sit still!” and “I think, therefore I am.” End ID.]

So if Knuckles was just an ordinary tribe member, it’d be unlikely for him to know enough to provide the necessary flashback details. And if Knuckles’s past was changed in order to provide an easier connection to the SA lore, he’d need to be very near to the action. Of course, he could just be a curious child, but even then, he’d likely be left out of several conversations surrounding Tikal. 

Most of Tikal’s flashbacks are spent alone- she only has a few arguing with her father, but most of her scenes are spent with the Chao and Chaos themself in the Chao Garden. Considering Tikal seems to be the only echidna frequenting the Chao Garden- the chao are afraid of her when she first approaches, Pachacamac arriving is basically seen as a declaration of war- there’d be no reason for an echidna to be there unless she brought them herself. 

Who would she bring with her? Perhaps... her little brother. 

[ID: Screencap from Sonic X of Tikal, surrounded by flying Chao while at the Master Emerald Shrine. End ID.]

First off, let’s get over the age thing-- I know you’re gonna say “Knuckles is 16 when Tikal is 14,” HOWEVER, TIkal did not age while inside the Master Emerald. She could go in at any point in Knuckles’s life, which means she could be anywhere from ten years older than him to a twin sister to two years younger. 

There’s no real concrete evidence of how old Knuckles would be in filmverse when the SA events happen, seeing as we have only seen Pachacamac existing and have no idea where this is in his timeline. However, from a writing standpoint, if you want to keep a bit of Knuckles’s backstory of living alone for a good chunk of his life, I’d say the massacre happening when he was ~8 seems likely. Old enough to have clear memories of the SA events but young enough to have his life completely sidetracked and feel like he raised himself. 

It’d be very easy for the flashbacks to feature Tikal taking a baby Knuckles to the Chao Garden, just telling him “don’t tell Dad, he won’t understand,” to talk to him about the grandmother he doesn’t remember who used to teach peace, to explain Chaos and the Master Emerald to him. 

And it’d be very easy angst for Knuckles being dragged along with the rest of the clan to take the emerald(s), watch his father basically doom his sister and his tribe murder innocent chao, and then see everyone he’s ever known murdered by Chaos, with his older sister stopping the rampage only by sealing herself and the destructive god in that emerald, leaving Knuckles completely alone. That’s all severe angst that pretty much no writer would pass up. 

Especially because it means Knuckles guarding the Master Emerald has now turned into Knuckles guarding his sister. 

[ID: Sonic X screenshot of Knuckles and Tikal looking up, surrounded by fire. End ID.]

So that’s the general theory. But let’s talk about something more fun: how it all ties into the Chaos Emerald Filmverse Theory. 

5. It all ties into our Chaos Emerald theory shh 

If you haven’t read Cori’s manifesto on the Chaos Emerald Filmverse Theory, allow me to summarize: 

Sonic is definitely a living Chaos Emerald, meaning that there are six other living Chaos Emeralds running around that we’re gonna need to track down. At least one of them’s Tails. 

First thing’s first... Robotnik going after Knuckles then makes perfect sense. If Robotnik somehow figured out exactly what Sonic was, he’d want a way to dilute his power. And the Master Emerald literally nullifies the power of the chaos emeralds. So whoever has the Master Emerald can severely nerf Sonic. Imagine Sonic getting within the boundaries of the ME and then immediately losing speed and falling flat on his face. Big oof. 

Second, it’s possible that Knuckles will also know what Sonic is. Because, well... what was Pachacamac after in Sonic Adventure?

[ID: Pachacamac attempting to talk down Tikal, who is t-posing in front of the Chao Garden in attempt to keep them out. Behind him is an echidna army, ready to attack. Pachacamac is saying, “We need those seven emeralds to give us total power!” End ID.]

The Chaos Emeralds. In order to use their power as weapons. 

And what was he after in Sonic 2020? 

Sonic. 

Interesting, huh.

Conclusion

Knuckles is gonna be the last member of the Knuckles Clan, guarding his older sister’s spirit inside an insanely powerful emerald, and will definitely be manipulated by Robotnik into using his Master Emerald to fuck up Sonic. 

And it’ll be really awesome. 

[ID: Sonic X screencap of Knuckles giving a thumbs up. End ID.]

[derekmorganscrocs]

Nancy Drew 2x10

Thoughts While Watching

Spoiler Alert!!

YO- THE- WHAT IS THAT-

Pls the Ryan puns, I can’t even lmaooo. Wholesome Nancy? PLEASE LMAOOOOO OK OK THIS GIRL IS MAKING ME LAUGH. oh no- the straw: SHE KNOWS. ms reporter is gonna DNA test nancy.

Is aces contact info for his bro “long lost brother”? GEORGE IS A RENTAL CAR? Pls. George has abs- I think I have a crush ngl. Bess knows- ODETTE IS CRUSHING ON BESS. Nick and Bess are about to be sister wives no cap.

Apparently he is Tamura, not Tamara... I’ve been calling him the second this whole time- was no one gonna tell me?! Oh enemies to lovers 250k words I see how it is. JOKING, JOKING. We don’t ship nancy and tamura.

“I thought I smelled bacon” OH PERIOD GIL. Sass king, I love. Oh Nancy getting all up in his space is something else. Good to see that Gil is rockin with ghosts, as he should.

“Typical waitress occurrence” okay, Tamura is kind of growing on me. He’s a little funny. “Whatever do you mean, another?” Ace stop trying to lie please. HOW OLD IS TAMURA- oh he’s like a history guy... I really just thought he was like an eternal being for a sec. “the supernatural detective and the basic one”

OMG BESS IS FALLING FOR ODETTE IN GEORGE’s BODY. and nick is seeing a contractor. (Awkward thumbs up). I STILL THINK GRANT IS A MURDERER. pls Nancy’s lil cheesey smile is so cute and funny.

Ryan coming off all smoldery, okay Riley smith. Own that swag.

Bess falling over made me laugh. Odette coming thru with the skating skill. Odess? Bessdette?? I love. Ace’s brother??? ALCOHOL- ODETTE. ACE HELP A GIRL OUT HERE!!!?

Tamura got left at the alter. NO WAY I WAS RIGHT LMAO sorry Tamura lol I know you got left at the alter or whatever but I like being right. PLS HES SO SARCASTIC ABOUT THE DRESS THEORY NO- AHAHA HES KILLING ME. (poor word choice but the point stands).

OH NO I SAW THIS NICK CLIP ON THE IG- IF THIS BITCH LIGHTS MY MAN ON FIRE I STG. NAH NAH NAH HES STUCK IN THERE. WITH A MURDERER.

OH M G. I SAW GAY SO I SAID GAY. THEYRE IN LOVE. ODETTE AND BESS IS SO CUTE. I love the French accent too.

OH NO NICK- DON’T GET LIT ON FIRE MAN, YEAH DUH THE DOOR IS WELDED SHUT- OH THEY BUSTED THAT DOWN LIKE NOTHING. Fire extinguisher fight.

SALT AND BURN, HOES. WHY WOULD YOU BREATHE IN THE SMOKE WTF

My girl nancy just fainted omg. I’m cackling at the prospect of what’s about to happen. BESS AND GEORGE GOT ARRESTED- GEORGES HAIR. what’s going on rn. “My face isn’t working yet” MOOD.

IM CACKLING OMFG TAMURA SLOW MO- pack it up property brother number three. “Were you just waking in slow motion” MY GIRL IS STRUGGLING. she’s trying so hard. GIL TOO- OKAY BUT GIL IS HOT- “so smoldery” YES MAAM HE IS. GOOD TASTE GIRL. She’s petting him? “No seriously get me away from them” the way she said that is sending me- she’s so freaked.

FANSON RIGHTS!! NANCY NOOOO. NO NANCY. STOP PETTING GEORGE’s BOYFRIEND PLEASE NANCY. THE HAIR- THE HAIR. I don’t blame her not gonna lie, I would also want to touch his hair. “I’ll kill Annette” MAAM JEALOUS MUCH OMFG. “Your palms are really sweaty” ACE STOP OMFG. Wow sis snapped there omg.

They locked her... in the freezer.

He FOUND the brother- ACE HARDY ACE HARDY ACE HARDY PLEASE. Ace half Hardy? Okay we’ve paused the show so I can do some math: so Ace’s dad was the Marshall for mom 1 and father to brother. And also father to ace but different mother. Okay we got it. Bess and Ace are such a cute friendship.

Aw FANSON YAY. “We’re gonna work on it okay? And we’re gonna get better at it.” PLEASE SOMEONE TALK TO ME LIKE THAT OMG. o nancy ruined the moment.

“She’s okay. Just a lil boy crazy” RYAN IS SO CONFUSED OMG.

Nancy having a breakdown in the freezer is a mood. Is she about to stab someone- NO SHES BREAKING OUT OF THE FREEZER. THEYRE ALL THERE OH NO. why’d she go over the railing like that I’m laughing so hard- SHE JUST BODY SLAMMED GEORGE OMFG IM SCREAMING LMAO

OH GOD THEY CAN HEAR GEORGE AND NANCY FIGHTING FROM THE FRONT- i love the absolute dragging that’s going on here, honestly vibes. it’s like they’re feeding a child.

The girls are fighting (Tamura and Gil) NICK JUST KICKED THEM OUT.

I thought she was gonna escape lmao. WHY DOES SHE RUN LIKE THAT OMG AHAHHAHA. oh no Tamura is... they’re gonna kiss Rn I’m gonna barf ew. STOP MOVING SO SLOW JUST GET IT OVER WITH SO I CAN LOOK AWAY PLS. oh nvm she’s good now. She just dipped and Tamura is like: what now

LOVE THIS GIRL TALK OMG. YES PLS NANCY. Did George just emoji? AW GIRL HUG. I love the friend moment here, pls the sleuth sisters are the CUTEST trio.

HIS BROTHER IS IN TOWN? PETTY BESS I LOVE HER.

aw poor Tamura... oh no omg I actually feel bad for him now :( aw besties!!! Teamwork moment here, I love. HE TOTALLY HAS A CRUSH ON NANCY AND IDK HOW TO FEEL 😭

WHAT OMG DID ACES DAD GET KIDNAPPED? That might just be an old photo I’m kinda dumb ngl

NANCY CHOSE GIL? ARE THEY ABOUT TO KISS RIGHT- yup they just kissed.

RYAN IS SMILING WHEN HES TEXTING HER OH NO. HES GONNA GET HIS HEART BROKEN 😭

DAMN IT VAL. NO NEED TO OUT NANCY AS THE GRANDCHILD, HOLY CRAP.

Okay, so the episode is over, but I KNEW one of them was gonna fall in love with a ghost. KNEW IT! But on the down low, Bess and Odette are cute.

Sister:

Literal GASP at Ryan’s photo shoot. Like sat up like she rose from the dead and gasped SO LOUD- Yeah we’re both Riley smith groupies, what about it.

(When they locked nancy in the freezer) “I gotta ask. Is the meat hook still in there?”

Here are some more (ignore the contact image please lmao the vibe in my phone is random pics of my friends/family):

So the only explanation you really need is she LOVES Riley Smith, and is definitely crushing on Ryan lmao. She literally GASPED so loud at model Ryan.

And she’s not a huge fan of Tamura x Nancy. Tbh idk how I feel yet.

[vic-chaos]

Do you have any headcanons for buttman (i cant with the name lol) and kenman? Or of course bunnyman.

jsdksdjsdjsjds I go with cartters/cutters sometimes too which can be easier to tagging/searching sometimes, but I’ve thought of it as buttman in my head for so long I can’t stop 😭 though the fact that its a really stupid and funny ship name does suit the two of them LMAO

and YESSSSS ahhhh I have SO MANYY...... I’m not gonna get into all of it with all these ships or I’ll literally just be typing an entire novel 😂 but let me see if I can pick one of my favourite headcanons to think abt....

I think Butters has a kind of weird crush on Cartman (this honestly like borderline canon confirmed imo lmao) but here are my heacanons on Why......... I think actually it’s a combination of things? Part of it is a sense of protection, Butters used to get pushed around a lot and he doesn’t really anymore. Cartman does mess with him, but nobody else really does. There’s very few characters who would intentionally fuck with Cartman or someone he’s protective of considering his reputation, and I think Butters knows this lmao... Something else that I think attracts him is that he likes the disobedience. Ever since they became friends he’s become a lot more rebellious and is standing up for himself, towards his dad and others, and intentionally misbehaving because he enjoys it. He’s lowkey kind of an asshole already (a part of his personality I feel like a lot of people ignore actually?? sjdjsds) so when he really goes off the rails he can sometimes go too far. But he’s at a point in his development where he’s exploring this side of his personality that he probably kept buried for a long time while his parents were abusing him, which we can see him exploring with Chaos too, and I think its interesting!

I actually think there’s even more to it... but I wanted to mention these details in particular because considering these things, I think that combination of feeling simultaneously safer and more brave when he's around Cartman is probably intoxicating enough to explain why he sticks around him when nobody else does, and why he continued to do so despite all of the mistreatment at the beginning too.

(Speaking of which, despite the bad beginnings.... it makes me happy to see a genuine love and care for each other starting to develop out of this 🥺)

Also!! While I’m still going - I feel like a lot of people think Butters is still being dragged into things against his will or manipulated, but that’s not the case anymore!! By now Butters has demonstrated multiple times that he’s more than capable of holding his own and saying no to Cartman if he wanted to. I mean:

So...... now we know he's choosing to continue to be close to Cartman because he wants to, and because he genuinely likes spending time with him and doing all of the ridiculous shit they do together lmao. And bc he genuinely likes him too... like:

(source: @haertshapedbox)

Since I’m thinking about it rn, kenman feels like its my comfort ship and it’s the one I’ve had for the longest.... buttman is a lot messier and I have some complicated feelings about it, but at the same time I can’t let them go because something about them really just makes me crazy jsjdsdjsjs

Bunnyman (also a top tier ship name) is definitely one of those “[character] has two hands” type solution ships for me, which USUALLY I’m not into, but for some reason I actually really love it with these 3?? I feel like they actually balance each other out very well. Kenny has a more calming and stable personality that both Butters and Cartman could benefit from being around, and although Cartman and Kenny already have a really good balance together, Butters can bring a kind of positive high energy that neither of them has