#i’m doing push-ups
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hold my hand but please don’t touch me.
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had an interview for a plant job in Nevada and afterwards the interviewer emailed me a list of all the known plants there confirmed by the organization and I keep considering responding with ‘Wow, and all these plants are running casinos you say?’ and every time I restrain myself
#i probably could do it because the interview went very well and we just talked plants for an hour#he read me so well dude at one point he asked me what my favorite basal angiosperm was#and I was like I’m gonna be honest it’s gotta be that one singular shrub found only on an island off the coast of Australia#that has no vessels only trachieds for moving water around like it’s some kind of pine tree#breaking news: local shrub must push water through a bunch of tiny tubes instead of a mix of tiny and large tubes. imagine doing this#i looked it up and it’s Amborella. that’s the plant in question
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this broken leg experience has made me realize how much muscle you need just to move around the house. I can walk without the cast now, but squatting to pick something up? kneeling and then rising? even standing for a long period in the kitchen takes a lot. and carrying things too, that’s something I couldn’t do while hopping about on crutches. every night I’ve been going to sleep with sore legs and arms just from performing my normal non-intensive household tasks.
#my body also holds onto muscle tone very poorly#like to an unusual extent. I could never keep up with my peers when I was a kid#and I’ve never been able to do a push up#it’s why I dedicate so much time to working out (when I’m healthy enough to)#I have to train hard just to reach the bodily strength of your average desk worker lmao
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For the sketch request I'd love to see you try hookfang >:)

Had to do it to em! (What if Hookfang gave Toothless some mating dance tips??)

This one’s a lot messier than the others, hope that’s ok, Hookfang is hard to draw in my opinion but after studying the concept art I think he turned out ok here!

#hookfang#httyd#dragon sketch#julesdraws#julesasks#opposite hand challenge#how to train your dragon#sketch request#monstrous nightmare#girl hookfang#fanart#I think my left hand is getting better at this!#sorry if it takes me a while to get to requests they take ages with my left hand but I’m determined to push through and do them all!!#as you can see my left hand really struggles with control#especially in the tail like GODSSS it took me ages I just decided to give up at one point lmfao#ty for the ask crow!!
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Leo getting hit with a truth curse but instead of forcing him to admit to super sad or worrying things it’s things like “it was me who broke the remote” “I saw Mikey prank Donnie and helped hide it because it’s way funnier if he didn’t know who it was” “I rip my clothes to look more like Raph’s because he’s really cool” “my stripes aren’t even red they’re pink!”
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rise leo#plot twist he COULD be admitting angsty stuff but he’s pushing the less oof truths forward instead on purpose#raph: hey leo what do you want for dinner#leo: *about to bare his soul on all his internal torment but pivots* I’m afraid of snakes#(no but fr Leo’s stripes being technically more pink instead of red is cute ngl)#(a very reddish pink to the point that in certain lighting it looks red but at the base they’re p pink)#(i also am very fond of the idea that Leo doesn’t just have questionable taste in fashion he also just loves Raph a lot and looks up to him)#but yeah I think that something like this would be 99% Leo admitting to unimportant things or admitting to how much he values everyone#like they all KNOW Leo loves them and he’s talked them up enough for them to know but it’s different when he’s like#‘I just wanna read my comics with you guys around - it’s my favorite place to be’#or again just random bs that doesn’t REALLY have a lot of weight like#‘I like using my portals to prank random people around the world’#‘I’m worried about being a bad influence on hueso jr’#‘sometimes I kinda wanna see hypno’s plans succeed’#‘it’s been way too long since I found this out and honestly it’s embarrassing but I actually don’t have a di-‘#SORRY COULDNT HELP MYSELF#(<-but did u know that that pink rather than red observation actually ties into this headcanon as well if u know about red eared sliders)
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i’m so unbelievably pissed at this show for having the gall to make ellie and dina walk through the capitol hill bookstore and rather than have it be a moment of connection and discovery for the two of them - thinking specifically of dina saying “ellie look it’s us” when she found that lesbian pulp novel - they instead have them cracking jokes and making fun of it, with witty remarks about the “happy proud rainbow town” as if the decorations all came from some naive happy-go-lucky folk who had never known the hardships of the apocalypse
and then they turn around and give dina the same contrived sad homophobic parent origin story that every other queer character has. stripping away her confidence and her history and everything that made game dina stand out. dina, who not only was bisexual but was jewish, and therefore knows better than most about both the sadness and pride that comes with having faced the worst and come out the other side. and instead they made dina some scared, ashamed little girl too uncomfortable to even say the word “sex.” why does shame get to exist in your apocalyptic world but not pride. you have to be joking
the very least we expected of this show was to have respect for their queer characters in the same way the game did. and they can’t even do that. if you won’t respect me as a queer person then why should i respect your work. go fuck yourself
#im honestly this close to just giving up and not watching anymore. i’m over it#grow tf up#like it’s one thing to just do a bad job at transferring a story across different types of media. i can at least respect the attempt#but it’s another thing entirely to completely disregard the source material in favor of pushing your own stupidass beliefs#tlou hbo#dina
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At its core the most important relationship arc in Avatar the last air bender is the one between Zuko and Aang honestly if you can’t see that then I don’t think we watched the same show.
Aang and Zuko are the true Yin and Yang in the show the push and pull. Fire and Air right down to their personalities.
It is both of them that have to go on the journey of learning that fire is more than just destruction can be used for more than just to hurt.
And that right there is the point it doesn’t matter if Aang defeats Ozai and they bring the fire nation to heel. Without a character like Zuko the fire nation would be lost forever to distrust and unrest, balance would never be reached. Because despite everything they have done all the damage they have wreaked the world still needs the fire nation and to work with the fire nation they need to know that fire can do more than hurt. And who best to show them than a prince who’s been burned himself?
The war started with the fire nation attacking the air nomads in a bid for control and it will end with the fire lord embracing an air nomad and taking ownership of his nations actions. You must first close a book before you can start a new one.
Aang needed Zuko just as Zuko needed him because to get peace a true lasting peace you can’t just cut off the head of a snake you have to change its mind. The world already lost the air nomads the balance is already precarious, it cannot afford to lose the fire nation too.
Afterall Air can snuff out a flame and it can also fan them. But when the two elements are balanced one existing in peace with the other it can also make a warm hearth for the home.
#they are literally each others foils even when they are on opposite sides they help each other grow into who they are meant to be#of course there are still dissenters and Ozai supporters#but the country is not in upheaval like it would have been if a whole new leader was put in place by the alliance#or if the alliance had to take up temporary rule#also having zuko already on their side means they could mostly just kick off on rehabilitation#Atla#avatar the last airbender#zuko#aang#avatar aang#Prince zuko#atla analysis#atla meta#atla zuko#atla aang#god the fact that pro Aang is an established tag kills me 😭#fire nation#air nomads#character analysis#I know a lot of people claim tui and la for zutara but honestly katara and zuko are far too alike to be push and pull#but again do as you please I’m just giving my opinion on my blog please do not attack me#zukaang
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Happy new years… let’s stay hydrated together ✨


#I didn’t end up going to the rave just stayed in with my buddies and had KFC (( Korean fried chicken )) and laughed til we cried so#it was still a wonderful start to the new year 💞🥰💞#but the fwb wanted pics of my potential rave look so I figured eh I brought the stuff anyways#and now I’m imagining locking eyes with a stranger on the warm and writhing dance floor#the beat thumps and shakes and rattles the air in our breath as the spotlights dance in the reflections of our held gaze#he pushes his way through the crowd with a singular stare and a wicked smile on his face#I smile and turn my back on him arching myself so he knows I am giving what he’s looking for#I take careful steps through the revelry toward the edge where the crowd thins out#I prop myself up on an available stool in a lonely corner of the club as he closes the distance between us#“now I wonder why you dragged me all the way here” he utters in a playful growl “trying to get far away from the crowd?”#I smile and I nod. “obviously. can’t really do what I want with you out there”#his eyes perk up and his smile gives away the desire building inside him. “yeah? why don’t you show me then.”#“I thought you’d never ask” I smirk. I reach down into my pants and pull out my phone#“so this one is blue. he’s the oldest but he’s sooooo sweet. and that’s Eva. my only girl she’s sassy but she loves swea-” he leaves#whaddahell I say demurely whimpering even… whaddahell…#gpoy
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I don’t quite know how my brain got here right now - but I’m thinking thoughts about the way the show has been paralleling Buck and Eddie with each other - as well as with the canon couples on the show - but in a very specific and interesting way - because when you take Abby and Tommy as a collective - they are a parallel of Shannon.
All three are firsts and not lasts for Eddie and Buck.
Abby and Tommy have been intentionally connected on the show (yes making use of a fluke name commonality but that’s what makes it especially clever and interesting) on several levels as being basically two sides of the same coin - Abby was his first serious relationship and Tommy his first queer relationship - they are both Bucks firsts and not his lasts. In the same way that Shannon was Eddie’s first and not his last - the show chose to have buck point out that Shannon was the first girl Eddie slept with - implying she wasn’t his first girlfriend (something that was confirmed in the cut Eddie/Chris conversation about the lake.
If you think of Shannon as two entities instead of one person - Texas Shannon and LA Shannon - it becomes easier to spot the parallels.
Texas Shannon is paralleled with Abby - both leave their respective homes and don’t come back - both Buck and Eddie expected them to return when they had done taking some time for themselves - finding themselves.
While LA Shannon is paralleled with Tommy - LA Shannon asks for a divorce after Eddie wants to have the second child he thinks is coming and to get remarried etc - to go all in with her and their relationship. He is making a decision based on flawed thinking and external expectations after a conversation with a ‘elder’ (supposedly wiser figure - Bobby).
Which is very much a parallel to Tommy dumping Buck after Buck decides to go all in and ask Tommy to move in and starts talking about marriage - after the hurdle of discovering Tommys past with Abby and having talked to an elder (in this case Josh who is a queer elder).
Both narratives are connected to commiting to something due to societal expectations - for Shannon it was becoming pregnant outside of marriage in a Catholic dominant society and therefore ending up married to Eddie.
While for Tommy it was having to mask himself as a straight man because he was in the army and firefighting - both environments that were toxicly masculine and heteronormative at the time Tommy was in them and so he ended up in a relationship with Abby - which then sets up the circumstances for Abby to feel the need to run to find herself.
Both Texas Shannon and Abby then feel the need to run - to find themselves because of the environment they find themselves in and this sets up LA Shannon and Tommy as second firsts for Eddie and Buck. And both LA Shannon and Tommy have grown and evolved since Texas Shannon and Abby and both can see that their respective relationships are not meant to last - that they’re not the right fit - that they are forced and they have the personal development to choose end them before they cause more hurt and damage.
It’s a great play on being firsts and second chances but not lasts and it ultimately shows the suitability of buddie - they make the same mistakes in a different way - both having their first independent of each other but having their second chance/ second first whilst within each others orbits - and because they are ultimately looking for the same thing it is all serving to spin them closer to each other to a point where they can understand what their lasts look like - and that it’s each other
#honestly this show is just insane#I love it here#it’s such good storytelling - to be able to take the backstories each character has had on the show and to then intertwine them to make#a deep and meaningful narrative that feels intentional - purposeful - it’s the best type of retcon - because it comes from a deep#understanding of the characters and narratives you’ve created and a willingness to let those narratives and characters lead the way instead#of trying to control them. that is why buddie as a slow burn is as good as it is - because Tim et al have let the narrative#and buck and Eddie lead them - it’s why s5&6 are weaker seasons - because outside forces were pushing the story in the wrong direction#and why Tim is doing a bit of a redux to reset things - so that the place the narrative wants to go is where it gets to go#I’m rambling and probably not making any sense at this point but all this to say#they are setting up a slow burn going canon in such a clever and satisfying way - weaving the narrative tapestry intelligently#thought thought thoughts#kym rambles#911 meta#911 abc#eddie diaz#evan buckley#buddie#911 spoilers#kind of I guess but probably not really#this got long!!!
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Just a girl who wants to be her mother’s daughter in the ways that matter
#Such a tenacious go getter & the smartest woman ik#Has NEVER looked back at a man twice. Knows she’s beautiful & that attention is guaranteed. Never desperate for male validation ever#The best fashion sense ik. She’s the epitome of classic & vintage#Doesn’t gaf what others are doing / is always tunnel visioned on her own goals#A mega workaholic and like. Maybe I’d rather balance but still she’s still an overachiever#I feel im becoming more and more like her by the day but still I have some work to do#Need to be more focused & to stop entertaining little boys fr#I just want to move w the unshackling confidence & elegance she seems to emanate effortlessly#I swear that woman was born that way!!!! So unfair for the rest of us mortals#Why does no one talk about the psychological torture that comes w having a naturally gorgeous genius mother#I’m dying over here I just wanna be like her but im pushing that boulder up the hill all the time#Meanwhile she’s always just On#HOW#Just an eldest daughter having a crisis about her mother who is also#The eldest daughter out of her and her two brothers#I need to journal about this I need to meditate#How to manufacture the drive that your mother was simply endowed with at birth#Not even joking I just got off my internship and now im sitting on a swing under the late May sun having a crisis about this
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We could just kiss like real people do
#elden ring#white mask varre#varre#tarnished oc#varre x tarnished#tarnished morigan#varrigan/varré x morigan musings below#I was hit with feelings so I drew this instead of sleeping#(shoutout to varréblogger/gracie for the sudden inspiration)#I didn’t get to elaborate on this in my ship guide so here’s some rambling#their relationship is a constant push and pull when it comes to who holds the reigns#because they both despise relinquishing control#morigan has SPD and varré…. is a deeply traumatised person#it’s basically a game of who can unveil more vulnerability in the other (at first)#so they can reach their own ends (Varré is sincere in seeking a recruit and comrade + Morigan is looking for Miquella and Trina)#yet they’re also people who desire deep connection and love and they do find it in each other#Varré is just more honest and open about it than Morigan is#it’s really up to Morigan to decide if Varré matters more to her than Trina (who she essentially has a dog/cat(?)-master relationship with)#projecting my own schizoid traits/mental illnesses on them#I’m sleep deprived so my ramblinh might not make sense but thank you for coming to my Ted talk
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“your favourite coat” bears in trees, april 2024 // “i’m doing push ups” bears in trees, october 2021
#bears in trees#lyrics#dak.post#something i noticed while listening :) thought it was near#*neat#your favourite coat#I’m doing push ups#how to build an ocean: instructions#and everybody else smiled back
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my manager is trying to get me to go to our boston location again and asked me to go this friday and i said no !!!!!!! and i gave no explanation !!!!!!!!! this is a first for me 🫨
#my sister is visiting friday !!! absolutely not#AND I HATE IT THERE!!!!!!!!!!!#i hate driving there and being there and everything about it#going there sm this month is one of the things that pushed me to finally quit#bc she can’t find anyone to manage it#and she started saying stuff like. oh you can drive up once a week to check in !!!#as if this doesn’t make me extremely anxious#bc it also takes time away from my store and my team#and we’re already running thin on coverage#anywayyyyyyy im kinda sick about it but i said no <3#i told her today that one of my coworkers quit and she looked. so stressed#little does she know that another one is quitting in a couple weeks#i’m trying to give her a heads up like hey you need to prioritize this store#bc she’s focusing so much on boston when it doesn’t make any money !!!#my store will make 10x what they do ! and yet she’s about to see it fall apart bc she doesn’t care enough to check in#idk. i was sad about leaving but now im excited lol get me out of here pls#gg txt
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thinking about trying to do rangeland firefighting for at least one summer while I’m still in my 20s with derangements that make me love toiling like a medieval peasant but in order to do it next summer I would need to undergo a second, less illegal and contentious but some would say more difficult transition with my body. theatre kid to jock
#it would be such a cool experience but as you can imagine you need to meet a fitness requirement so the fires don’t destroy you etc etc#classic fire behavior but anyway you need to be able to walk 3 miles with a 45 pound pack in 45 minutes#it’s a test given by the forest service#however there are also a few other guidelines which are:#-can run 1.5 miles in 10 minutes 30 seconds#-can do 25 push ups#-can do 40 sit-ups#-can do 7 pull ups#easy for anyone who played footed ball in high school but unfortunately I was too busy not lifting things up and putting them down#but now I’m like. perhaps I could also pick heavy things up and put them down
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Canon Star Trek relationships always fail to interest me
#they either come out of nowhere or they make so much sense that it’s ridiculous it took so long#let’s set up a relationship that makes sense and then just not do it#even better if last minute they just switch to another relationship that never made any sense#like I love Star Trek so much I just wish they would stop trying to shove romance down my throat#the relationships they choose to push make me want to puke#99% of ‘romantic’ scenes in any Star Trek show just make me horrendously uncomfortable#like an I the weird one? maybe I’m alone on this#star trek
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honestly i just dont get why sometimes people get all weird about quadrants and insist they’re unhealthy always no matter what
like yeah im not stupid i know they CAN be fucked up and can be weird and toxic but so can any romance. human romance has been toxic and fucked up for me many times. tbh if we take a step back and just look at the basic ideas of all of them i don’t think any of those have to be evil and terrible necessarily
like oh no me and my boyfriend have a fun rivalry that we both like being in and both agreed to where we have fun competing with each other and talking shit and then make out! FUCK!!! that’s horrible i would NEVER want that! i would never be guilty of forcing my boyfriend to play tetris with me over and over and insulting him the entire time
oh no my boyfriend has anxiety and i calm him down! oh god we like cuddling and talking about feelings! we both agreed we like this relationship dynamic and feel fulfilled by it! AAA SCARY!!! GET SCARED!!!
oh no sometimes my boyfriends are both annoying and i voluntarily get between that and make people be less annoying! FUCK!!!!!!!! we are going to DIVORCE!!!
#it’s cool if you don’t personally want any of those things#and yeah#alternia is fucked up#big fucked up murder planet#they love insane fucked up rules that are bad for everyone#but idk i feel like all romance is kind of fucked up#and you usually always have to do an insane amount of work to make it healthy and normal lol#and none of these dynamics by necessity HAVE to be horrible#you don’t HAVE to only rely on your moirail and not talk to your friends about your feelings#you don’t HAVE to get fucked up with your kismesis#you don’t HAVE to be a sad unfulfilled auspistice who kinda gets pushed into the relationship#if i’m thinking about the dynamics purely just as concepts#none of that shits a requirement#idk if this makes any sense to anyone else lmao#i just mean like#i don’t think any of those things are uniquely terrible i guess not in any ways that human romance isn’t#and people manage to have ok human romances all the time#not as often as they should lmao#but sometimes#so why not quadrants#i can get being uncomfortable with them#they’re weird#and definitely more complex than i went into in the post#but i don’t think they’re uniquely terrible
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