#i’m assuming there will be a fight for it to be picked up

[sunarryn]

DP X Marvel #29

Jazz Fenton did not mean to become a Black Widow. It just kind of happened. One minute she was babysitting Danny’s mess because he decided to pick a fight with Kang the Conqueror (again), and the next she was knee-deep in S.H.I.E.L.D. files, covered in blood, and being hailed as “one of the most promising Red Room graduates they had ever seen.” Which was strange, considering Jazz had never been to the Red Room. Or Russia. Or… spy school at all. She was a licensed therapist. She had a degree. She paid taxes. She made salad. She was a normal woman, damn it!

“You killed fifteen HYDRA agents with a clipboard, Fenton,” Director Fury said, pinching the bridge of his nose as Maria Hill silently sipped her coffee and refused to make eye contact. “That’s not normal.”

Jazz folded her arms stubbornly. “In my defense, they attacked me first. And they insulted my handwriting.”

“You wrote ‘Your unresolved childhood trauma is not my problem’ on a sticky note and taped it to one of their foreheads.”

“And it wasn’t my problem.”

Across the room, Natasha Romanoff watched with the wide-eyed horror of someone seeing their own ghost. “She’s… she’s me,” Natasha whispered, pointing at Jazz. “But worse. Worse.”

Clint Barton leaned in. “I think I’m in love.”

“Shut up,” Natasha and Fury barked at the same time.

Things had spiraled out of control after that. Somewhere along the way, some Russian spy network got hold of a very blurry surveillance photo of Jazz decimating an entire mercenary squad with nothing but a heel, a pair of chopsticks, and a very aggressive therapy session. They promptly assumed Natasha had gone rogue (again), and put out a bounty. A very large bounty. The kind that made even the Winter Soldier raise an eyebrow and go, “Damn.”

Naturally, Danny found out.

Naturally, he panicked.

“JAZZ,” he screamed through the phone while flying upside down over Manhattan traffic, “WHY IS THERE A TWENTY MILLION DOLLAR BOUNTY ON YOUR HEAD?!”

“I don’t know!” Jazz screeched back. She was currently riding on the back of a stolen motorcycle with Deadpool (who thought she was Natasha and wouldn’t take no for an answer) while simultaneously answering frantic S.H.I.E.L.D. calls and rerouting an emergency therapy hotline. “ASK THE RUSSIANS!”

“WHICH RUSSIANS?!”

“YES!”

Meanwhile, Deadpool, wearing a T-shirt that said “I Heart Therapy,” shouted over the wind, “YOU’RE MY FAVORITE AVENGER NOW, NATASHA!”

“For the last time, I’m not Natasha—”

“I LOVE YOU TOO!”

Things escalated when Bucky Barnes appeared out of nowhere, tackled Jazz off the motorcycle midair, rolled into a perfect crouch, and then pinned her to the ground with a knife to her throat.

“I thought you were dead,” Bucky hissed, eyes wild.

Jazz blinked up at him. “Buddy, I don’t even know you.”

“That’s what you used to say before,” Bucky whispered, full of tragic anguish.

Deadpool sniffled loudly from behind them. “I love a good forbidden lovers-to-enemies-to-strangers-to-lovers again trope.”

Jazz kicked Bucky in the face and ran.

Within three hours, every major faction of Marvel’s expanded universe was hunting her down—S.H.I.E.L.D., HYDRA, the Russians, Deadpool, Bucky, a very confused Peter Parker who thought he was supposed to save her, the X-Men (who thought she was a rogue mutant), and Kang the Conqueror (who thought she might be a time-displaced Natasha clone sent to assassinate him).

Thor, meanwhile, simply declared her “a most worthy warrior maiden” after she threw an entire food court table at Loki during a hostage situation.

“It’s about time Midgard produced more women of valor!” Thor bellowed, swinging Mjolnir with dangerous enthusiasm. “I SHALL TAKE HER TO ASGARD.”

“Get in line,” Deadpool snarled, adjusting his “I Heart Therapy” shirt.

Meanwhile, Natasha was trying to commit actual murder.

“I swear to GOD,” she growled, stalking down a S.H.I.E.L.D. hallway, “if one more person says I’m being so quirky today—”

“Natasha, babe,” Tony Stark said, popping out of a side door, “your emotional dysregulation is off the charts and honestly? It’s refreshing. You should get cloned more often.”

Natasha shot him a look so cold that even JARVIS’ firewalls froze.

Tony raised his hands. “Okay, okay, chill, Strawberry Shortcake. No need to murder me. Save that for—” he pointed dramatically— “your emotional support twin.”

“She is NOT my emotional support twin.”

“That’s not what the footage says.”

On a giant monitor, Jazz was currently choke-slamming Sabretooth into a dumpster while shouting, “YOU NEED TO LEARN HOW TO HANDLE REJECTION HEALTHILY!”

“Icon,” Clint whispered, wiping a tear.

Even Steve Rogers, paragon of old-fashioned dignity, was looking a little starry-eyed. “She’s very… efficient.”

“Efficient?” Natasha barked. “She’s deranged!”

“I like her,” Steve said firmly.

Jazz, blissfully unaware of the chaos she was causing, had holed up in a New York City bookstore, eating chocolate muffins and trying to finish her psychology notes while surrounded by six unconscious mercenaries she had “politely discouraged” from kidnapping her.

Danny phased through the ceiling with a pop and immediately tripped over one of the bodies.

“OH MY GOD, JAZZ!”

“Don’t use the Lord’s name in vain, Danny,” Jazz said absently, underlining a particularly important point about cognitive-behavioral therapy.

“YOU’RE IN A BOOKSTORE FULL OF CORPSES.”

“They’re not corpses, they’re just resting. Violence-induced naps.”

“WHAT—”

“Keep your voice down, you’re disturbing the literature.”

Meanwhile, Nick Fury was in a meeting with the Avengers yelling so loud birds outside fell out of the sky.

“I WANT HER ON PAYROLL,” Fury shouted, slamming his fist on the table. “GET ME FENTON.”

“Already tried,” Maria Hill said wearily. “She hung up and said we needed therapy more than she needed a paycheck.”

“She’s not wrong,” Bruce Banner muttered.

Tony smirked. “I mean, I am kind of curious. What happens if we just… hire her?”

“World peace,” Clint said instantly.

“Or total annihilation,” Natasha said darkly.

“Either way, it’ll be entertaining,” Deadpool chimed in, somehow already sitting in one of the chairs with popcorn.

“WHO LET HIM IN HERE,” Fury bellowed.

In the bookstore, Jazz finally looked up from her notebook to find Deadpool holding out a bouquet of slightly singed daisies.

“For you, my queen,” he said solemnly.

“I will mace you,” Jazz promised.

“Just like Nat used to,” Deadpool said, sniffling again.

Peter Parker dropped down from the ceiling. “Hey, uh, hi, Miss Fenton? I don’t really know what’s happening but I think you’re amazing and could you maybe not kill me?”

“I don’t kill people,” Jazz said, affronted. “I help them confront their inner demons and process their suppressed trauma through intensive violence-based therapy.”

“That’s… oddly comforting,” Peter said.

It all came to a head when Kang, exasperated beyond mortal comprehension, opened a portal above the bookstore and tried to yoink Jazz into the timestream.

He succeeded.

Sort of.

Danny grabbed her ankle mid-yoink. Deadpool grabbed Danny’s ankle. Peter grabbed Deadpool’s ankle. Clint Barton, swinging from a grappling hook, grabbed Peter. Then Thor decided he wanted in and hurled Mjolnir into the pile for good measure. The portal overloaded with a sound like an air fryer exploding in a church.

When the dust cleared, Jazz was standing on top of Kang, holding his own dislocated arm in one hand and a muffin in the other.

“HOW?” Kang wheezed.

“You tried to abduct a woman during her muffin break,” Jazz said sweetly. “Actions have consequences.”

Thor roared with laughter. “TRULY A MAIDEN OF WORTH!”

Fury appeared, looking absolutely done with existence. “You’re hired.”

“I don’t want a job.”

“Too bad. You’re in.”

“Can I negotiate for dental?”

“You already have dental.”

“…Sold.”

And that’s how Jazz Fenton, licensed therapist, ghost expert, and once-proud civilian, accidentally became a Black Widow. She wasn’t trained. She wasn’t programmed. She wasn’t brainwashed.

She was just tired.

And honestly? That was worse.

By the time she got back to Amity Park, her parents had no idea why Nick Fury was sending them fruit baskets or why Deadpool kept showing up at their front door with mixtapes titled “For My Future Therapist Wife.”

Danny refused to speak to anyone for a week.

Tucker made it worse by posting “Jazz Fenton, New Black Widow” memes online. Sam bought Jazz a leather catsuit “for the aesthetic” and refused to take it back.

And Jazz… Jazz just made another cup of tea, put on a sheet mask, and scheduled herself a very long therapy session.

Because someone in the family had to be sane.

It just wasn’t going to be today.

[cheesycatz]

Spamton EX and addisons crumbs you can lick off the carpet because I feel a little bad for abandoning him for 8 months

- read lore here -

plot scraps (yapping session) below

First, I’d like to establish my interpretation of the relationship between Spamton and the addisons. I like to see their conflict as two-sided. They weren’t mean to addispam, but, because they saw him as “just another addison,” they never truly understood him or his desires. They couldn’t understand why he refused to settle for a simple life, why he wanted to be at the very top. Spamton didn’t want to conform, he wanted to be his own person. I don’t know if he could even put it into words at that point. And, because he felt so alienated, it was easier for the voice on the phone to manipulate him. It was the only one who truly understood him.

(My canon addisons have the same personalities as they do in the Wormton AU. I’m just going to ignore the fact that they’re like 20 years younger in Wormton’s universe lol)

The addisons noticed that Spamton started acting differently after his big break, but they didn’t understand the reason behind it. They assumed it was just the riches and fame warping him. And, when they inevitably have their fight at the Cyber Grill, poison is spat from both sides. Spamton doesn’t want them to know that he's completely reliant on outside help, and he’s become so paranoid that he shuts them out of his life. He doesn’t feel safe with them, both because of the manipulation and because they never previously understood him. The addisons respond with varying degrees of hostility, because all they really know is that Spamton barely talks to them, is suspiciously rich, and acts like he’s above them.

If one of the addisons visited Spamton before it was too late, maybe something could have changed. Spamton had no one for company but his crumbling mind. The calls stopped coming, whether Spamton was the one to break away or not. Whatever was going on with him and Tenna’s crew dried up. Jevil, the few times he showed up, was not exactly a therapist. Swatch used to listen to him vent, but their sympathy vanished once he discovered NEO and started worshipping it. He revered it as a god, the only hope he had left of escaping his disintegrating life and this world that saw him as nothing but living garbage destined to be forgotten.

Spamton’s puppetification started as soon as he made contact with the voice on the phone, but its progress was exponential, starting out undetectable, showing subtle signs as he reached the top, and growing rapidly by his decline. More and more of his fur fell out, never growing back. His skin slowly died and flaked off, only made worse by the fact that he anxiously picked at it. By the time he was evicted, he had peeled all the skin off his hands, revealing the segmented plastic that had been growing underneath. Between his corpse-like appearance and Queen’s general dislike of him, every mention of his name had been scrubbed from the city. The more drastic changes to his body–the warping of his teeth and face, the drastic shortening of his legs, the loss of his tail, toes, and claws–took place during his first months on the street. Starving, disoriented, and even more isolated, Spamton was in denial of his new form for a long time. He never accepted it, just replaced his denial with complete and utter hate for the body he was trapped in, and a determination to finally take NEO.

The addisons assumed he was dead. Spamton did have a missing person’s report, though it was hard to find. They were the only ones who ever searched for him. They probably did accidentally catch a glimpse of him in the 20 years since, but his glitched voice and completely different appearance would’ve made him unrecognizable. The fact that he actively tried to avoid them didn’t help. I think, given how horrific of a state he was in, they probably would want to help him, especially if he came clean, but you really can’t blame him for not wanting anything to do with them anymore. His view of them gets warped over time, seeing them as just traitors. He remembers the good times, but the bad times are so much more vivid. 

------

Due to the fact that Spamton EX kind of just roams around eating out of dumpsters all day, one of the addisons is bound to stumble across him eventually. While he can still remember the addisons in his compromised state, and automatically doesn’t trust them, he’s pretty easily placated with food. I think any one of the four could accidentally find him first, but I drew Blue because I’m very biased towards them thanks to the Wormton fic. The last time they’ve seen his face is when his ads were plastered all over the entire city, so he’s completely unrecognizable in his current state. He can comprehend the questions the addisons ask him, but it takes too much brain power to respond or think critically about it for the most part. 

I drew Blue meeting Spamton EX early on, when he’s around five ft tall. They recognize his jacket and the shape of his glasses, and eventually discover that he responds when they call him by his name. The fact that the probably homeless, half feral, weird puppet-bird-dragon thing is somehow Spamton is, frankly, horrifying. He was a missing cold case. He was supposed to be dead! No matter how bitter some of the addisons feelings are towards him, I don’t think any of them can look at him in his current state and say he hasn’t been through enough (though, they don’t have to be nice about it).

Blue interacts with him over a few days, not close enough to realize that he’s already gained several inches. They tell the other addisons about him, too. They notice just how terrible his wings look. The muscles aren’t weak enough for them to start dragging on the ground yet, but they look like the inside of a dryer vent that hasn’t had the lint cleaned out in 30 years with the sheer amount of downy fluff and old feathers stuck to them. He doesn’t react as they touch his wings, pulling them open and witnessing a waterfall of Spamton-themed asbestos falling out. Orange realizes that the downy feathers, alongside the too small holes ripped through the back of his jacket, imply that the wings grew in recently. He lets his wings lay limp against the ground once they let go. 

Blue tries to question him about his wings, and, once he finally realizes that, no, that's not a heavy blanket attached to him and is, in fact, a completely new pair of limbs, he freaks out, overheats, and blacks out. NEO uses his voice box to produce an error message, which is the only comprehensible phrase they’ve ever heard him say at this point. Blue tries to carry him to their shared house, but he’s so heavy that they need help. 

At some point while trying to treat him, Spamton’s soul comes out (HIGHLY concerning, because an addison’s organs aren’t, you know, supposed to burst out of their chest), immediately revealing the source of the problem, a sickening bloody disk wedged directly into his heart. They assume it's responsible for all of his appearance, and is some really weird form of malware. Spamton wakes up, tries to scratch the addisons with the precision of a newborn kitten, manages to breath a Spamton-shaped white fireball at the wall, and stumbles out the door on all fours once one of the addisons opens the door for him.

He avoids the addisons for a while, during which he gets found and preened by Swatch. Between Blue trying to get him to fold his wings properly and making him aware that he has wings in the first place, his wings aren’t atrophied in this version, and he can move them when he's awake. Though, they still dangle when he’s unconscious, and he never cleans them. Eventually, he accidentally finds an addison again, and is willing to tolerate them as long as he still gets his free food. He’s over 7 ft tall at this point, his jacket torn to shreds. Blue feels bad for him because of his lack of clothes, but Orange doesn’t see the point in making him clothes if he’s going to outgrow them in a week. Pink figures he doesn’t even care, considering he’s been missing pants the entire time. 

Spamton’s size continues growing, much to the addisons’ horror. His claws leave white streaks in the concrete, his body weight dents their dumpster, and the feathers he leaves grow as long as their entire body, then even longer. Spamton, the shortest addison, is now as tall as their house, wings massive enough to knock them over with one flap. While they made him aware of their wings, Blue didn’t realize he was also unaware of his size until he picked them up like a doll, prodding at their limbs and making a confused sound. He doesn’t hurt them, but they are painfully aware that they are much more fragile than the dumpster he had already smashed like a tin can.

When Spamton regains his mind, he doesn’t remember a lot from his time wandering around Castle Town, but he remembers the addisons being involved in some way, because he somehow knows exactly where their stores and house are. He decides to avoid them while adjusting to his new body, living in Ralsei’s castle. 

Eventually, Spamton does confront the addisons, a little disgusted by how civilized they’re suddenly being, because he still sees them as backstabbing traitors. If they cared about him so much, why were they only doing something about it now? They’re 20 years too late. He’s already broken beyond repair, and he isn’t going to come crawling back. But, the addisons never had any idea the extent of what Spamton’s gone through, and he was never going to tell them. No matter how angry some of them were, they all still looked for him when he went missing. Everyone made mistakes, and everyone played some part in this mess. He doesn’t have to forgive them, but they’re willing to try again if he’s willing to.

Spamton slowly starts to interact with the addisons again, usually one on one. I could imagine Orange making him some clothes that actually fit, Blue trying to be nice while also pretending they’re not still scared, Pink making fun of his goofy ass, and Yellow getting stuck as the unqualified therapist. This would be a lot more nuanced and complicated than I’m willing to fit in a short what-if scenario post.

I think it would take him a really long time to forgive them. And, maybe he’ll never be truly comfortable with them, never reveal what actually happened to him. But, they were at least willing to try to understand him. And, he’s been alone for far too long. Worst case scenario, he can blast them to smithereens if they try anything. Perhaps he could befriend someone else from the future chapters? Or maybe he’ll just be making frequent assassination attempts at Tenna.

There’s my lil idea for how the addisons could be incorporated into my Spamton EX. He’s mostly the same, but goes through a little more angst in exchange for some reconciliation. I don’t think I described it much in my original EX lore post, but he’s still very much a cryptid after his recovery. I could see him monetizing it or using it as free publicity. The poor Castle Town citizens would be terrified of the building-sized bird man that randomly pops out of alleys and threateningly tries to sell you fake car insurance. Or, seeing the glint of his glasses in the sky right before he descends onto the dumpster in front of you like the mother of all seagulls. Maybe he’s metaphorically like the dragon that the village barely tolerates, but gives a sheep every once and a while so he won’t burn down the entire village.

I keep worrying about being in character, but I suppose most Spamton EX's are almost unique characters on their own, so I'm trying to get myself to have more fun with it. I'm thinking about bringing back the magenta suit jacket my old OLD (so old he doesn't even exist on my tumblr) EX had, to lean into that pink and green color scheme more. Who knows when I'll get to that, but hopefully it won't take me another 8 months, woops

[edandstede]

they were going to get married. we were going to see them struggle with the inn, and grow together, and overcome new obstacles. we were going to see how the crew’s journey came to a close, where the revenge ended up, what happened with their plans for prince ricky. we were going to see them fight for each other one last time. we got a happy ending in case this very thing happened, but we didn’t get THE happy ending - the one david jenkins has had in mind the whole time. ed and stede weren’t finished, the crew weren’t finished, their stories hadn’t truly concluded and i am so sad.

[badolmen]

I’m being so brave about it. <- enough annoyance to poison the sea, beaching whales and washing the shores in millions of rotting fish

[discoinfernos]

❝ i have to take you back. ❞ From @lost-shades to Angel (Justiceiswrath side blog)

❝ like FUCK you do, ❞ Angel snaps, offended at the very idea of some fucking nobody he’s never even seen before being sent after him like he’s some fucking package that can be delivered. heeled boots clack against the pavement as he turns and continues walking. to where? he’s got no goddamn clue. AWAY. ❝ you can tell your d-bag employer to leave me tha HELL alone! ❞

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

We NEED more soft!Rafe after the new season. He moved out and got a whole house to himself maybe he could ask his girl to move in? Becasue he wants her there and to be part of his life...his new life where he's a better person

Request: SOFT RAFE PLSSS

I don't know when I found time to write this, but enjoy soft!Rafe asking his girlfriend to move in with him! Feel free to send more requests, I'll write when I find time

Warnings: soft!Rafe, relationship moving quickly, mention of Ward's death

—

‘’Rafe, I truly can’t see. I’m not cheating,'’ you promised as you walked with Rafe’s hands over your eyes.  

He had picked you up in late afternoon and refused to tell you where you were going. Just that he wanted to show you something...and that you had to close your eyes during the whole drive. 

Rafe laughed a bit, trusting you. ''Okay, okay.'' 

You walked a few more steps, then he stopped and removed his hands from your eyes, revealing a large two story house. 

A frown formed between your eyebrows. ‘’Who's house is this?''

He wrapped his arms around you from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder. ‘’Mine,'' he whispered in your ear, giving you a gentle kiss on your jawline. ‘’As of this morning.'' 

Surprise filled your face. ‘’You bought a house?’’ 

Every time Rafe showed up to your place after a fight with his family — most often his father —, needing a bed to crash in for a few days, you tried talking to him about getting his own place. It would solve a lot of conflicts. But Rafe always said he wasn’t ready to leave the family nest. 

Behind you, Rafe hummed. ‘’I bought it with a part of my dad’s inheritance money. Sharing a house with Rose is not possible anymore. Too much has happened...’’ 

You covered his hands with yours in silent support. You’d heard the ugly stories about Rose and Rafe. He hadn’t always made the best decisions in the past, but Rose constantly blamed him for everything bad that happened to the family. Rafe may have deep personal issues, but it was wrong of her to villainize him.

‘’Do you want a tour?’’ he asked, his voice brimming with excitement, and the eagerness in his eyes made it impossible for you to refuse.

You followed Rafe up the steps to the porch of his new home. He fumbled briefly with the key before pushing the door open, but just as you were about to enter, he pulled you to a sudden stop.

“Wait,” he ordered, his strong arms wrapping around you as he effortlessly lifted you up.

You squeaked, startled by the sudden move. ‘’Rafe, we're not married, you know,’’ you said with a soft laugh, looping an arm behind his neck. ‘’You don't have to carry me over the threshold."

He set you down gently on the wooden floor of the entrance hall and shut the door behind him. 

Inside, the house felt big and empty, its openness accentuated by the sunlight streaming through the uncovered windows.

‘’I don’t know why, but I expected it to be fully furnished,’’ you admitted, glancing towards what you assumed was the living room. 

Rafe chuckled, his fingers lacing with yours as he guided you further in. ‘’Some people do buy them furnished, but this one wasn’t. You’ll have to help me pick out furniture because I suck at decorating.’’ 

The kitchen was massive and even had two ovens — a rich people thing. It was unfortunate Rafe didn’t cook. The backyard had a large patio where Rafe mentioned wanting to set a barbecue and a firepit, and maybe one of those large daybeds. He wanted his house to be cozy and feel like a home, not look straight out of a fucking magazine.

As he led you into the last room upstairs, the master bedroom, Rafe's voice grew soft. The words were burning on his tongue, but he didn’t know how to say them. 

‘’And here's our bedroom. I mean, the bedroom.’’ He made a mistake on purpose, just to see your reaction. 

You tried to hide the smile that spread across your lips, your heart beating fast in your chest. The slip of his tongue hadn't gone by unnoticed. Did he truly mean for you to live here with him? Was this why he took you to the house and insisted on making it a surprise? 

‘’There’s a big bathtub in the master bedroom, and—’’ Rafe continued, moving toward the bathroom to show you the bathtub, but you were not listening. 

Moving in with someone is a huge step in a relationship, not something you can decide on a whim. You and Rafe had only been together for a few months, so it felt a bit early to take that step. But then again, everything in your relationship had moved quickly from the start. He met your parents two weeks after your first kiss, and said ‘I love you’ after twenty-six days of dating — yes, you had counted them. 

When Rafe glanced back at you, he noticed you seemed deep in thought. ‘’Is everything okay?’’ he asked, an eyebrow raised in concern. 

You snapped out of your thoughts, shaking your head. ‘’Yeah, everything’s good,’’ you replied, smiling at him. ‘’I was just thinking of all the time it’ll take us to christen our house.’’ A mischievous grin curled on your lips as you walked toward him. ‘’Maybe we should start now. It’s a big house.’’ 

Rafe’s eyes flickered with surprise as he heard what you were implying. He expected you to refuse, to say it was too soon. 

‘’You’ll move in with me?’’ he asked, a hint of disbelief in his voice. 

You nodded, and a smile curled on Rafe's face. He's never been happier.

—

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[whytheylosttheirminds]

you knock me out, i fall apart

being a new dad is the scariest thing in the world for rafe, until his baby girl smiles at him for the first time...

When his daughter was born, she cried so loud that Rafe thought something must be wrong. But then he saw your face, full of relief and joy as they placed your baby girl on your chest.

“She’s a fighter, huh?” The nurse asked with a chuckle.

“Just like her dad,” you said, leaning back onto the pillows and gazing up at Rafe with so much affection and relief in your eyes he thought he might be dreaming. He hoped you didn’t see the blood drain from his own face.

The baby’s little fists clenched as she kept crying out, letting the world know she was here and she was not going to be quiet about it.

“Wh-what’s wrong with her?” Rafe looked at the doctor with a panic stricken face. “Is she hurt?”

The doctor didn’t seem worried, which irritated Rafe. Could he not hear her? She was so tiny and helpless, why did no one else seem worried?

“It’s a good thing, healthy lungs,” the doctor told him casually. “Got a name?”

“Josephine Cameron,” you answered without a second thought. 

You’d picked the first name only a few weeks after discovering you were pregnant, but you and Rafe had never talked about her last name. He assumed you didn’t want to offend him by saying it’d be better if your baby girl didn’t have the weight of his name strapped to her. Her life would be hard enough with a fuck up like him for a father.

“You want her name to be Cameron?” Rafe asked in surprise, his face still ashen while yours was glowing with sweat and color and new mom joy.

“Of course,” you said simply, eyes fluttering shut with exhaustion. “Mine will be too soon.”

He was stunned, but he tried not to show it, hoping everyone in the room would attribute his teary eyes to the exhaustion of your twenty-four hour labor. He’d been awake and at your side for every single second.

For just a moment, all was quiet. Then, Josie’s face scrunched with a fury he’d only ever seen in the mirror. Her scream built like a wave, crashing over the room when she finally wailed with all the force of her tiny lungs. Rafe’s heart shattered at the sound. All he wanted in the world was to help her, to take away her pain, and he hated that he had no idea how to.

He didn’t understand how you could be so calm while something was clearly wrong with the baby. But you just rubbed her back, Josie settling under your gentle touch and nuzzling into the soft skin of your bare chest. Looking down at the two of you, he’d never been more in love, or more sure that he wasn’t cut out for this. Not like you were.

“Can you take her?” You requested through a yawn.

“I-I can’t…I don’t know how.”

You smiled at him, your heavy eyelids struggling to stay open. 

“Just cradle her head, like this.”

You demonstrated for him before passing the little bundle in your arms over to him. 

His hands were shaking, shoulders tense. He held her away from his chest, eyes wide with panic.

“What if I drop her?”

Beneath his words, his truest fear - what if I’m too much, and it hurts her?

But you were already slipping into well-earned sleep.

“You won’t, baby,” you said dreamily.

Rafe wasn’t so sure. He met Josie’s eyes, her little blue irises identical to his own as she blinked up at him. She was only a few minutes old, but he thought he saw something knowing in her gaze, her face reading something like, this guy? Seriously?

He had the strange urge to apologize to her: yeah so sorry, this was all a big misunderstanding. I’ll go get your real dad now.

But he couldn’t, because he was her real dad, no substitutes would be coming to rescue her from that fact. 

Josie’s blanket came unswaddled as Rafe continued to struggle to hold her properly. You couldn’t fight off the sleep that took over, so a nurse rushed to his side and mercifully pulled Josie from his arms to place her in the bassinet. He was grateful, but felt strongly like he’d just failed his first fatherhood test.

Just like her dad, you’d said.

For Josie’s sake, he sure hoped not.

------❤︎------

Rafe had committed to getting clean the second he saw that little pink plus sign on the pregnancy test. And he’d kept his promise. His body took a long time to adjust, but now he was healthier than ever. He woke up with you for every feeding, hair messy and eyes half closed as he went to the kitchen to get you water and a midnight snack.

“You can go back to sleep, love,” you’d assure him sweetly.

“If you’re up, I’m up.” He’d say.

You stopped trying to convince him to go back to sleep, grateful for his partnership in the exhausting early hours.

One night, only a few days after you’d gotten home from the hospital, you finished feeding Josie and set her on the boppy laid on your mattress. She wriggled and stretched, drowsy in a milk haze. 

“I’ll be right back,” you told Rafe, standing to head into the shower.

“Oh, uh, okay.” He tried not to let you hear his nerves. He hadn’t spent much time alone with the baby since carrying her in from the car a few days ago. He was still so sure he’d break her if given the chance.

Josie settled for a minute, he thought she’d gone back to sleep. Just as he was breathing a sigh of relief, her little eyes blinked open, staring unfocused at the ceiling above her. Her vision hadn’t developed yet, but he could tell she sensed her mother’s absence already. Her face scrunched in the unsettled way Rafe was quickly learning led to her cries.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, shhh.” Rafe pulled the boppy closer to him, letting it sit between his legs as he bent over the baby, his bare shoulders casting a shadow across her tiny body in the dim lamplight.

“She’ll be right back,” he tried to sound assuring, but his eyes flicked nervously to the cracked open bathroom door, hoping you’d change your mind about a shower and come back to them.

He looked down at his daughter and took a deep breath, reaching tentatively to place a hand on her little belly. Since she was born, you’d been trying to determine who she looked more like - you or Rafe. But now, gazing down at her, it was strikingly clear how much she looked like a Cameron. 

Her chubby little cheeks concave in tiny dimples, just like her dad’s. Her bright eyes are deep blue, just like her dad’s. Her little forehead scrunches and her little lips purse when she’s upset, just like her dad’s. 

The sudden realization that she looked so much like him warmed Rafe from the inside out, something completely new blooming in his chest. She was his. His baby girl. His eyes grew damp as she squirmed and squawked, looking around the room like she was still trying to find you. He gently settled the tips of his calloused forefingers in the dips in her soft cheeks, unable to resist a gentle squish.

“Hi baby,” he said lovingly.

The deep, soft sound of his voice caught her attention, her eyes locking on him. And then she smiled.

Rafe’s heart leapt in his chest, he looked up, considering calling out for you to come see, but he was speechless. He was tempted to take a picture, but no image could capture how perfect this moment was.

“Hi Jojo,” he repeated, his voice cracking. “Are you smiling at dada? You’re smiling at dada! My girl!” 

The parenting books stacked on his bedside table had taught him most babies don’t smile until they’re six weeks old, but the longer he looked at her in amazement, the wider she smiled at him. 

“You’re better than most babies, huh?” He cooed. “Yeah. ‘Cause you’re my smart girl. You’re dada’s girl.”

Without even thinking about it, he scooped her into his arms. She was already nestled against his chest, skin to skin, before it hit him how natural the movement had been. He was finally holding her the way she needed him to. She scrunched up her little body, curled on his chest in perfect peace.

Rafe dropped a featherlight kiss to the top of her head as she drifted off to sleep.

“My girl.”

------❤︎------

a/n: wait I loved writing this sm. I might do some more dada rafe and baby jojo fluff soon <3

update: here's the au :)

divider credit to @qqmariztwsse !

[reidrum]

how dare you think it's romantic, leaving me safe and stranded

A/N: if i stared at this any longer it would never see the light of day...so here she is! this is the longest fic i've ever written and i'm kinda gagged about that but i really hope you like it and if you don't that's okay too this is just silly angsty brainrot anyways thanks for reading this my inbox is open if you wanna yap more summary: in which your kidnapping forces you and spencer to face the fallout following your recently ended relationship cw: angst, hurt/comfort, reader is kidnapped/held hostage, implications and mentions of SA to reader but nothing happens, cm type violence, ex!spencer, lowkey lovers to enemies back to lovers, cat adams, medical jargon, miscommunication trope, the bau team is family, afab!reader, pet names wc: 5.1k

Every case you and Spencer have been on has been insufferable for the rest of the team since your falling out, if it had to be given a name. Everyone always had to deal with your constant bickering and harsh words. It was the same in every case, a difference of opinions that led to incessant fighting between you two, Hotch would have to separate you both and use your joint intelligence separately for the sake of keeping everyone alive.

This last case was nothing different, a serial killer in Athens, Georgia who was religiously sacrificing young women in the name of a cult. Both of you fighting over what you believed the other to be wrong about in their part for solving the case. Spencer thought the unsub would have struck in a zone closer to his home, you assumed he was only going after women who resembled someone in his life. The real problem was that you were both wrong.

And it ended with you being held hostage.

It all happened so fast. You were in the car with Spencer and Rossi driving out to the unsub’s house to check for new evidence when you had stopped at a gas station about 15 miles out from the house to refuel. Rossi got out of the car to pump the gas, Spencer sat in the passenger seat, and you went inside to use the bathroom and grab a quick snack.

You quickly washed your hands after finishing in the bathroom and wiped your hands on your pants, still slightly damp as you turn the handle of the door. As you’re perusing the aisle looking for a snack, you can feel the presence of watchful eyes on you. Casually, you slowly look up and around at the source and clock a figure an aisle over with a cap turned downward blocking their face. 

Your gut was sending flares up, telling you that danger was near. You nonchalantly walk over to the aisle he’s in, pretending to look at the nuts and dried fruits while attempting to get a look at his face. In a (maybe not so) bright idea, you think to knock a bag of nuts on the floor next to the lurker’s feet in the hopes he’ll bend down to pick it up for you.

With a push of your hand, the bag knocks off the shelf and onto the floor and you both bend down to pick it up.

“I’m so sorry about that,” you chuckle lightly, “I’m such a clutz.”

“No problem at all, Miss—.” He stops talking all of a sudden, you’re unsure why. You follow his gaze to your left hip where your FBI credentials are peaking out.

Shit.

He draws a weapon faster than you’re able to react with getting your own out, and by the time yours is out the barrel of his is flush with your forehead.

“Drop it.”

You quickly recognize the man as your unsub, miles away from his hunting ground and about to stray from his victimology with you.

“Come on, up. We’re going for a little ride.” He snarls, glancing outside at the black SUV with your colleagues. He grabs you by a hairful and drags you out the back door, shooting the gas station clerk before making the escape with you to his pickup truck. You’re shoved against the car door, back facing him, as he place a zip tie on your wrists and opens the door to sit you in the back seat. The unsub gets in the driver’s seat and starts the car, glaring at you through the rear view mirror, “I’m gonna have fun with you, fed.”

Meanwhile, back in the car Rossi stands at the pump waiting for the tank to fill and Spencer remains in the car looking over the case details once more. He can’t help but feel something is wrong, but can’t place his finger on it. He looks over the details again meticulously, searching for a fault anywhere in your, or even his own logic. Rossi closes the tank and hops back in the car, “She’s not back yet?” he pondered.

Spencer hadn’t even realized you weren’t back yet, “I guess not,” something wasn’t right, “She went ten minutes ago right?”

Rossi nods, opening his mouth to speak when a gunshot coming from the gas station cuts him off. The men look at each other, eyes widened and rush out of the car, weapons drawn.

“FBI!” Rossi enters, looking for any sign of you but coming up empty. Spencer takes note of the disheveled store, produce and cans lying astray. He steps around the mess to find an out of place bag of sour gummy worms on the floor in the middle of an aisle only filled with nuts and dried fruit. 

Sour gummy worms were your favorite.

A sinking feeling settles in Spencer as he tries to fight the reality his brain is trying to tell him. He looks to Rossi with a pained expression, and Rossi matches it back.

“He took her.”

___

The next few hours are a blur for Spencer.

Rossi called the team to meet them at the gas station, already telling Garcia to hack into the security cameras to find any clue of where he’d taken you. Emily and Derek were checking out the crime scene, Hotch and Rossi talking to the sheriff. JJ finds Spencer staring off onto the one road connected to the station.

“We’re gonna find her, Spence.”

He whips his head up at the sound of her voice, “I should’ve realized sooner. I knew there was something off about his MO, a—and I just couldn’t place it. And now she’s gone and it’s all my fault and I never—“

“Spencer,” JJ interrupts softly, “You couldn’t have known. None of us did, even her.”

“I should have,” he laments, “And if she…if something happens to her because I wasn’t paying attention…” He trails off, too afraid of what his brain thinks is the ending of the sentence.

JJ offers him a sympathetic look, understanding the conflicting emotions, “We’ll find her, she’s strong. You know that.”

He stares back at her hoping, praying, that she’s right and you’re going to be okay. You have to be.

He’s pulled out of his head by Morgan calling him and JJ over, telling Garcia on the phone to repeat her findings.

“Okay, I think I have a lead based on the security camera footage on the car he has and where it’s been last seen. I’m sending the last known coordinates to your phones now.” 

An idea springs to him, “Garcia, can you also check the gas station records and see how much he filled his tank?”

The clacking sounds of her keyboard ring through the phone before she speaks again, “He didn’t fill a full tank, only like, fifteen miles worth of gas.”

Everyone looks up at each other in realization of what the new information means. You had to be close by. Morgan walks over to tell Hotch, who immediately talks to a state ranger about setting up a 15 mile radius around the gas station with monitored roadblocks, no entry or exit without inspection. 

After Hotch finishes he walks back to Spencer and lays a hand on his shoulder, “Good job, Reid,” He nods back with a thin lipped smile and fiddles with his pen anxiously, “Are you okay?”. Spencer can’t tell if he’s genuinely asking him or if he’s asking him for the sake of him being able to do his job properly considering the circumstances. Ever the profiler that man is, he thinks.  He nods again nonetheless and walks over to meet Derek at the car.

Spencer and Derek get into the car and set the route for the coordinates Garcia gave, ETA 14 minutes. He swallows nervously, do you even have 14 minutes? What if he’s too late? What if you’re not even there? What if he never got to tell you—

“Reid. Are you even listening?”

“What?”

Derek raises his eyebrows as he glances at his friend, “Got something on your mind?”

“Nothing.”

“You’re a shit liar, man.”

“I’m not lying.” Even he doesn’t believe himself.

“Spencer—“

“I’m just worried! Okay? We’re all worried, it’s not a big deal.” he snaps.

Derek stops at a red light and looks over the console, “I’m going to ignore whatever that was,” guilt sweeps over Spencer’s face as he continues, “I’m not stupid kid, I know how you’re feeling. But you can’t let whatever turmoil you got in that big brain of yours affect this case. Not now.”

“I know that, Morg—“

“No, you don’t. I know you’re thinking about her, we all are. And we all want—need—her to be okay too. We will find her, but we can’t let the unsub get away too.”

Spencer sighs outwardly seeing the truth in his words. As concerned as he was about you he needed to remember this was still an active case. He couldn't let your past with each other cloud his judgement, even if the fallout still haunts him every day of his life. He needs to save you, but he also has a job to do. He just wasn’t sure if he’d remember that when they finally found you.

——

A pounding in your head stirs you awake, the bitter taste of metal flooding your senses as you come to. You blink a few times adjusting to the lowlights of the unfamiliar environment, hoping to find something distinguishable to ground you back to reality. It doesn’t help once you realize the blood crusted over your eye is the reason for your obscured vision. You attempt to rub it off on your shoulder ignoring the sharp pains shooting up from the abrasive contact. 

Once you think you’ve cleared enough you blink a few more times registering your surroundings to be a house, a cabin more accurately. Your memory is a little fuzzy as you try to recount what happened before you were knocked out cold.

Gas station. Unsub. Unsub at the gas station? But where was I…I went to the bathroom… and was getting…gummy worms?… But Rossi and Spencer were just outside… now I’m here…so does that means the unsub—

“Oh good, you’re awake.”

You jolt at the voice—the unsub you’ve come to remember—and you realize your hands are tied up behind your back, quickly coming to the second realization that you are rendered both injured and immobile.

“What do you want, Jason?” you say hoarsely after a minute.

He chuckles, “I didn’t know they made them so pretty at the academy…” he walks over and kneels in front of you, gripping your chin between his forefinger and thumb to move your head, “They probably kept you around for…entertainment right?”

You whip your head, “Don’t fucking touch me.”

“Oh, you’re feisty. That’s good, keep it up. Makes this more fun.” he walks back over to the table and fiddles with something, you can’t really tell from the floor, “So how’d they make it work back in—what is it called—Quantico! They take turns with you or? There’s so many of y’all, probably had a system.”

The pounding in your head makes it more difficult to process anything he’s saying, “The hell are you talking about, take turns with what?” you ask, wincing through another wave of pain.

He turns around holding a metal rod and walks over, angling the rod under your chin to tilt your face up to meet his as he snarls, “I can’t wait to see how it feels to fuck a federal whore.”

All the color drains from your face and you kick into whatever gas is left in your autopilot. Your feet are flailing in every direction, body thrashing violently to prevent Jason from getting a good grip on you. You quickly learn the purpose of the metal rod hearing the clang! first, a millisecond passing before the pain and threat of unconsciousness spreads through your brain. 

The hit takes you out long enough for him to pin you down on the floor, the weight of his body landing on you before the metal rod goes for your limbs. It’s then you realize the throes of death have wrangled you for what appears to be the last time, and it’s probably wise to start saying—thinking— your final words.

To my parents, I love you. To Derek and Penelope, thank you for letting me third wheel with you. Emily, I’ll miss our weekend Sin City excursions. JJ, please give your boys the biggest hug from their favorite aunt. Rossi and Hotch, you always cared for me like I was your own—I am so grateful for you.

And Spencer…Oh, Spencer. How I hoped I would have the time to say I’m sorry for what happened, I hope you’ll forgive me in due time. I wish I told you that nothing about us ever changed for me. You were and will always be, My Spencer, I just wish I could tell you one more time how much I lov—“

“FBI, Drop your weapon!”

A clattering sound of something dropping rings directly next to your ear and the weight that was on you alleviates at the same time. You groan out and instinctively curl up on yourself, the pain spreading throughout your body. The sensory overload is so much you don’t hear the approaching figure crouching next to you.

“Hey Hey Hey,” Spencer stutters, quickly making work of the ties on your hands and holding you gently as he lays your head on his lap cradling you close, trying to hide the forming tears when he hears your whimpers of pain, “You’re okay, it’s okay. The medic’s coming.” He looks back to where the unsub was and watches Derek put him in cuffs, nodding at Spencer before walking out with Jason.

“…Spencer?” you whisper out weakly. You think you’re dreaming honestly, that in the wake of death you learn heaven isn’t a place but only his arms.

“Yeah, honey, it’s me.” he chokes out looking back down at your bruised face. He’s unsure how you still look angelic even when you’re hurt, but it doesn’t surprise him that you do. You were always good at defying the laws of nature, he prayed it extended to your immortality.

“It hurts.” you pout pathetically.

He brushes a strand of hair out of your eyes gently, “I know it does, honey I know. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry this happened. I should’ve been there. I’m sorry, baby.” he whispers tearfully.

You cough out and whimper in pain, “I’m sorry too.”

Spencer shakes his head vehemently, “No, don’t apologize. Don’t do that, just keep your eyes open for me, okay? I’m right here, I won’t leave you.”

The tiredness soon wins and your eyes flutter close. Before Spencer can even panic and beg you to open them again the medic finally comes and asks him—pulls him— to move so they can start working on you.

He reluctantly backs up and watches on with glossed over eyes, barely registering all the things they were sticking in you to wake you up. The medics stabilize your neck with a C-SPINE and lift you onto the gurney, wheeling you back to the ambulance. The same medic who asked Spencer to move comes up to him again, “We’re taking her to Georgetown Medical, you’re allowed to ride in the back with us if you want.”

You slowly come to again on the gurney and Spencer meets your open eyes before you even realize they’re on you. Without hesitation he says, “Yeah, I’m coming.”

The medic team lifts your gurney inside the rig, and right before Spencer gets in he feels a hand on his shoulder. He turns around to find Hotch, “You’ll be okay?” 

It’s a loaded question. He’s not asking if Spencer is okay at this moment, because it doesn’t take a profiler to see that he’s the farthest from it. He says it as a grounding reminder knowing how Spencer gets about you. It didn’t matter to the team if you both fell out, the pair of you never faltered in your subconscious for each other. Both of your actions always moved faster than your brains, especially when it involved the other. 

That’s what worried his Unit Chief.

He nods and Hotch gives his shoulder a light squeeze, “Keep us updated,” the concern clearly etched in his eyes breaking through his usual stoicism as he looks inside the rig, “We’ll meet you there as soon as we can.”

Under the bright lights of the ambulance he’s—unfortunately—able to really take inventory of the injuries you sustained. The blue and black bruising scattered your limbs, the congregation of it on your stomach telling him you have at least two broken ribs. His eyes trail further down your body before abruptly stopping, but not on an appendage.

Spencer’s face pales even further than it already has staring at the glint on the undone button of your trousers shining in the reflection of the light.

If they didn’t get there when they did…If he got to you a second later…He can’t even fathom to think about what would’ve happened.

He’s broken out of his spiral by the EMT sitting next to him offering a tissue, which is when Spencer feels the tear and snot streaks rolling down his face. He takes it and wipes his face mindlessly before muttering, “Can I just…” hands reaching out to you before his words come out. Spencer doesn’t notice the EMT tearing up as he gently buttons your pants.

——

You were a fighter.

At least, that’s what the doctors told Spencer when they came and updated him in the waiting room. He blanks out for most of the conversation, eyes unfocusing and ears on low lest your name be spoken.

“She’s stable and awake now, the nurse can take you back to see her.”

He shakes his head to recenter and mutters a thank you before following the nurse through the double white doors. His senses are heightened as he walks closer to your room. The scuff of his shoes on the linoleum floors, the pedantic beeping of machines in the rooms he passes, until he hears the only voice that’s ever been enough to calm the warzone in his mind.

“Hi, Spence.”

His feet move on their own accord right next to your bedside, hands hovering awkwardly at his side. He’s silent for the first couple minutes, just a faint sniffle here and there before he takes a seat near your bed and hears you speak again.

“You can touch me, Spence. I won’t break more than I already am.”

“Don’t say that,” he chides quickly, “It’s not a joke.”

“Well, someone should be the comedic relief here.”

He lays the tips of his fingers right on top of the tips of yours, “You could have died.”

Your face softens, “I didn’t though.”

“You could have.”

“Spencer—“

“Stop down playing it. You don’t know what it was like finding you like that.”

“I mean I have some idea, ‘cause like, I was there.” 

Spencer deadpans at your poor attempt at lightening the mood, a faint smile peaking through while he shakes his head, “Insufferable even at your deathbed.”

“Yeah, the Grim Reaper heard me yapping and said ‘keep her’.”

He chuckles softly as his hand moves further up to rest the front of his palm on the back of your hand, “How are you feeling?”

“I’ve…been better. The doctor said one of my broken ribs punctured an artery, a big one apparently,” you flip your hand over so both of your palms are touching but not laced, you softly continue, “Told me I was lucky I came in when I did. Any later the internal bleeding would’ve spread to my lungs.”

Spencer feels the tears springing again and a lump forming in his throat, “I’m so sorry, sweet girl,” the pet name slipping out before he could realize, “I should’ve gotten there sooner, or realized something was wrong at the gas station.”

“Hey. Don’t do that. You saved my life.” your fingers intertwine with his and squeeze with whatever strength you can muster, which isn’t a lot and it makes his heart clench tighter. “I’m here.”

He lets out the breath he’s been holding since he walked in, “You’re here.”

“I didn’t forget what you promised me when we…broke up,” God you wish it didn’t sound so terminable as it did, “I knew you’d find me. You always do.”

Another sniffle leaves him as he rubs his thumb soothingly on your hand, “I always do…Look, there’s something I need to tell you—“

He doesn’t get to finish his sentence as Penelope & Company burst into your room bearing balloons, chocolates, and many, many stuffies.

“How’s our girl doing?” Penelope huffs, hauling an entire Hallmark catalog worth of gifts in tow.

“She’s doing fine, Penny.” you chuckle lightly, trying your best to hide the wince of pain from your side, “You did not need to do all this.”

“Nonsense, everyone knows bear stuffies are the real medicine of the world.” she gleefully ignores the nurse onlookers, “I also brought you this, of special request by someone who shall not be named.” From her back she produces a bag of your favorite candy—sour gummy worms. A fact that you knew only one person was privy to.

You act surprised nonetheless, “My favorite! Thank you, Penny. And all of you, for coming to see my crippled self.”

Spencer watches the team take turns doting on you. Emily, JJ, and Penelope sit with you for about four Gilmore Girls episodes—another lost relic of modern medicine, according to Penny—after which Morgan, Rossi, and Hotch keep you company for a little bit before bidding you good night with forehead kisses and well wishes. Spencer stays with you the whole time, never once leaving your side. 

You are so loved, he thinks. He didn’t realize how much he liked watching you be loved. It makes him miss the times when he could do that for you too.

——

Weeks pass since the day of your kidnapping. You still find it weird to call it that, even though it’s literally what happened. You’ve been on house arrest—bed rest—begrudgingly, and while Penelope’s very glittery visiting schedule has kept you entertained, it’s been hard when the only person you really wanted to see has refused to come visit since you left the hospital.

You’ve asked Penelope why Spencer hasn’t come, and all she can offer you is a sad smile and a ‘He said something come up sweetie, sorry.’. Texting him seemed even more daunting, more because you weren’t about to beg for his attention if he obviously doesn’t want you to have it. 

The doorbell steals your attention and you glance over at the schedule before you walk over to open it, not expecting a visitor at this time.

Spencer looks up from his shoes hearing the door open, “Hey.”

A minute passes, “Why are you here?” you ask bluntly.

He looks confused, “I came to check on you, brought you takeout from the Indian place you like.” The food in his hand smells heavenly but you can’t seem to enjoy it yet without getting an answer.

“Why are you here, now?” you ask again with an addendum.

He either really wants to piss you off or his ear blew out on the way over but he chooses to ignore you and enter your apartment, “You having nightmares again?”

“What? No…” you lie poorly, straightening up your back, “Just tired.”

He chuckles, “Good to know you’re still a terrible liar. Did you know you wear Doctor Who shirts when you’re feeling anxious?”

Your brows fuddle in confusion but he elaborates, “It’s probably subconscious, something you find comforting and naturally gravitate to in times of distress. It’s a normal stress response but…you’re wearing an Eleventh Doctor shirt.” My Eleventh Doctor shirt, he thinks.

“That doesn’t mean anything.” you feign.

“Maybe it doesn’t,” he nods, “But you are anxious aren’t you?”

“Spencer, what the fuck is going on, why are you here, really?” your eyes narrow, arms crossing defensively.

“I told you, I came to check on you.”

“You just woke up this morning and decided it was convenient for you to see me today?” Spencer opens his mouth to speak but nothing comes out. You stare at him with tearful eyes and the emotion spills out of you before you can stop it. You speak again after a few moments, voice barely above a whisper, “You left me. Again.”

He tilts his head, “No, I didn’t.”

“Yes, you did.” you grit out, “You were rooted at my bedside the entire time I was hospitalized, and the second I was discharged you were nowhere to be found. I thought, maybe with Penny’s schedule you’d come by, but then I came to find out that you didn’t even put your name down.”

“You almost died!” he retorts, “You almost died, because I made a mistake and you got hurt because of it!”

“So, that gives you the right to abandon me for the second time?”

“I didn’t…” he sighs out roughly, “I didn’t abandon you. I just, couldn’t…face you.” Face you, in pain, as a result of his actions.

“Is that what happened the first time you left?” you bite back.

His eyes steel over, “That was different.”

“I don’t see how.”

“You know why I left.”

“I don’t think I do, Spencer—”

“I left because I was putting you in danger!” he yells cutting you off, “I left because loving you meant dragging you into all the messed up stuff that happens to me, stuff that’ll keep happening to me.”

Tobias. Mexico. Cat.

A single tear rolls down your face, “That’s bullshit, I’m sorry. We work the same damn job, the risks are the same if we’re together or not.”

“You don’t understand—“

“Then fucking enlighten me, Spencer.”

He stares at you, fighting an internal battle of whether he was really willing to admit his truth to you, one that he knows you deserved to know but wasn’t sure if it would put you more in harm's way.

“Cat had details about your family.”

That’s not what you were expecting to hear. Your face drops, “Wh—What?”

His eyes dart around the room nervously, “After I got out of Millburn and we went to see Cat, she was trying all these tactics to get me to break. I was doing fine, until she started talking about you. She was saying things that only you told me, stuff that’s not even on record.”

You remember that day. You were supposed to go with him and JJ to the correctional facility but ended up stuck at the BAU because your skill set was more valuable in helping Penelope locate Mr. Scratch. You remember how he came back to you that day, distant and glassed over. It was easy to chalk up his behavior following it to his recent release, but when you woke up a few weeks later to an empty bed and a throwaway note saying ‘I’m sorry.”, you couldn’t figure out for the life of you why all of a sudden you didn’t exist to him, like you didn’t matter.

“I made a choice, one that I knew would protect you.”

“That’s not a decision for you to make.” you snap.

“I had to,” he says lowly, taking a step closer to you, “If being with me puts your safety at risk…” another step, “I’d rather live in a world where you hate me and are still here…” one more step, “Than one where you loved me and died because of it.” he manages to choke out, taking one final step towards you.

It’s quiet for a couple minutes, save for the soft whistle of the breeze coming from your open window. The resolve in you has long faded, leaving behind nothing but the skin on your bones to weather the damage. It makes sense to you why he did what he did, and you don’t know if the roles were reversed would you do the same thing. But you knew that you loved him and he loved you, and that alone should have been enough.

You can’t help but let out a whine, sounding like a petulant child, “That’s not fair, Spence.”

“What’s not fair, baby?” he softly whispers.

Your whine turns into a cry, “That, all of this. The fall on your sword act in which you decide what’s best for me is to leave me stranded, thinking I did something wrong that made you stop loving me.”

He steps forward a little more, his face mere inches from your own, “You think I stopped loving you?”

“Was I supposed to think otherwise? You couldn’t even stand being in the same room as me.”

His hands raise to gently cup your face, thumbs positioned under your eyes to wipe the fallen tears. He’s missed looking into your eyes as close as he is. For a man who doesn’t believe in religion he’s pretty certain the gates of heaven lie within your irises.

“I was selfish,” he swallows, “I wanted to keep you safe but I did so in a way that I felt was most logical, which turned out to be so fucking wrong regardless since you still got hurt.”

He brings your face impossibly closer, the warmth of his breath gently hitting your face.

“There isn’t a waking moment where I don’t love you. Even when we weren’t together, I still looked out for you and I made sure you were safe in ways I couldn’t tell you. I meant what I said. I told you I’d find you in every lifetime. I love you, in every lifetime, angel girl.”

The ache in your heart only grows with his words, reminding you that he always was and will forever be, Your Spencer.

“You can’t do that again,” you stutter out through tiny sobs, “You need to tell me what’s going on, whatever it is. We figure it out together.”

He nods softly, the hair on his forehead faintly brushing up on yours, “We figure it out together. I’m so sorry for everything, baby.” his lips press a long kiss to your forehead, “I’m here now, I’m not going anywhere.”

You rise on your toes to meet your lips with his, the missed time and unspoken words flowing silently between you both. His hands wrap gently around your waist and pull you flush to his chest, with yours entangling with the brown curls you had missed so much.

Finally back in his arms, you sigh with exhaustion and relief, “You’re here.”

“I’m here, honey.”

[andypantsx3]

contents: general bakugou x princess reader; fem + afab virgin reader. nsft; oral (f receiving) & missionary. semi-sequel to this drabble. 3.2k.

Your wedding day arrives far earlier than you are prepared for.

It’s a tense affair, for you at least. The country depends on it, and you feel the scheming eyes of the nobility hot on your skin as you pronounce your vows to Bakugou. They will not take kindly to your having chosen him over their sons and brothers, over their own desire to rise to power. There will be a price they will want you to pay, soon enough.

The chapel is resplendent with sumptuous decor, the court in their finest. But the room is fringed with Bakugou’s men in their military leathers, a reminder that this is not a happy day, but rather a dangerous political stunt. It keeps the noble houses docile while they are in the room with you, but you know they will return to their estates and their plans. 

Your fate is in Bakugou’s hands, now, in more ways than one.

The ceremony is dizzying, and impossible to wrap your head around. The preceptor pronounces Bakugou your prince-consort, ostensibly to remain so while you assume the throne after your father’s passing. You will continue to rule him as his sovereign. But your vows to Bakugou also promise him your obedience as his wife. 

It is a contradiction, an impossible trap, the very reason why the general is the only man you could stomach the thought of marrying. If a husband is to rule you after all, Bakugou will do so justly. 

The thought does not stifle your nerves, however, as you make your way back down the aisle, sit down to the reception, and take your meal. A disquieting, anticipatory feeling settles over you, fizzing under your skin. You barely pick at your dinner, and drink too much of the wine.

You can tell Bakugou notices, scarlet gaze ever-perceptive, though he does not say anything until you are shepherded to the bridal suite to consummate.

Various aides try to follow you in to prepare you, but Bakugou slams the door closed on them, propping it shut with one broad shoulder. He barks at them to scram.

“Lord General—that is, Your Highness,” one of them stutters through the door. “We are required to witness the consummation—to verify that it is complete.”

A bolt of shame goes through you at this, and you catch hold of one of the intricately-carved wooden bed pillars. Bakugou grunts, holding the door closed with one palm while spinning to the nearby dressing table and chair. He grabs the chair, wedging it forcefully up under the door handle.

“You’ll be sure of consummation when I’m done here,” he growls through the door. “Don’t need you little fucking perverts making eyes the whole damn time. Now beat it.”

A weird sound escapes you, something between a gasp and a laugh—at his promise, at his gruffness.

“Your Highness,” comes a plaintive entreaty through the door. Bakugou slams a fist against it, and you hear a squeal and a sound like someone’s fallen over their feet.

An absurd laugh seizes you, and Bakugou eyes you pettishly.

“The fuck’re you laughing about,” he says, but there’s no heat in it.

Your fingers twist on the bedpost, nervously tracing the lines. “You’re taking to your new post well.”

Bakugou’s features twist into something dangerously satisfied, a smirk painting his mouth. Your breath comes short.

“My post,” he echoes, raising an eyebrow. “As your husband.”

Your stomach swoops. The disquiet flames back to life under your skin, settling heavy in your gut like a stone. 

“I supposed it is a post like any other,” you say, fixing your gaze on the ground. “There are responsibilities and… marital duties.”

You hear the soft tread of Bakugou’s boot as he steps away from the door, the rustle of his doublet as he draws closer. His many medals and ceremonial sword belt clink softly. It is a fashion you know he does not prefer, always living in his shirtsleeves—the better to fight in, to train in.

A calloused hand takes your chin, tipping your face up to his.

“You nervous, Princess?” he asks. His tone is obnoxious, as usual, but his crimson gaze traces your face.

You barely suppress a shiver under his touch. Your stomach churns with a thousand emotions and you find you don’t know how to feel. Relieved that you’ve made it this far. Annoyed with Bakugou’s composure and general manner. Apprehensive about what is to come. And warm, suddenly, all over. You do not want to examine why.

“Nonsense,” you sniff. 

A feral smile curls the corner of Bakugou’s mouth like he sees right through you. “You’ve never been with a man.”

Your face burns but you force yourself to return Bakugou’s assessing stare. “I’ve never been to Musutafu, either, but I know it well enough. I should think I am… prepared.”

Something hot alights in Bakugou’s gaze, burning like a coal. It’s not unlike how he looked at you that night in the dark outside his chambers, when you’d first come to him with this wild proposal.

“And what do you think you know,” he says, flatter than a question.

Your nose grows hot. “Enough.”

A thumb slides along your jaw, settling against the pulse in your neck. “Answer the question, angel.”

Your face just might be on fire. You steel yourself, reciting dispassionately. “You will undress me and then… enter me. I shall lie still—they say you can breathe through the pain and it will go away after some time. You will… work yourself to completion. And then we shall be done.”

A snort comes from Bakugou. “Is that how you royal tightasses do it?”

You feel your eyes narrow. “That is how everyone does it.”

Your ladies in waiting had been very emphatic. All of them had spoken of the same mechanics. The initial discomfort, the pain, the way a husband moved upon his wife until he was satisfied.

“You don’t know shit, Princess,” Bakugou says.

You reach up to pull his hand from your face, but he tenses, arm growing solid and immovable. 

“Explains why all you nobles are such fucking tight-buttoned pricks if that’s how you’re doing it.”

Your reply is startled out of you when his hand finds your waist. You take a step back, and then another, startling again when your back finds the wall. Bakugou follows you, eyes hot.

“You are insufferable,” you inform him hotly. “I am sure of the matter.”

“You’re always sure of a lot of things, Princess,” he says. His hand is back at your waist, and suddenly all your skin feels too hot and tight, stifling like a velvet dress in summer.

“I am sure you are the most obnoxious man on earth,” you say. “Now be quiet and commence with it. Let’s have done with it.”

Bakugou’s face is suddenly closer than you’d remembered it being.

“I’ll have done with you alright,” he says. “But I’m not gonna do it like you little uppity prudes.”

You find you can’t think of what he means, all of your thoughts clouded with his proximity, the feeling of his hand moving to your skirts.

“I—but there is only the one way,” you manage. None of your ladies had mentioned anything else.

Bakugou’s mouth cuts into a smirk again, and you hate him for how pretty it is. 

“We’ll fuckin’ see about that,” he says.

And then his mouth is pressed to yours. 

It’s nothing like the stilted peck you’d been obliged to give him at the ceremony—one that still left your face burning, for some unknowable reason. This feels entirely different in its intensity. Bakugou’s mouth is hot and soft and tempting and eager, and your body thrills with it.

Every inch of your skin feels like it zings with lightning when he licks into your mouth, and he presses you harder into the wall. You feel his groan all the way down to your toes.

“B–akugou,” you pant when his mouth leaves yours, only to stifle a yip when he moves down to your throat. He sucks a mark there, laving over it with his tongue, and you feel like you're melting in his hands. “That’s—not my—ah!—mouth,” you manage.

The tiniest scrape of teeth has you yelping again, and you find yourself clutching his bicep for purchase.

“No shit,” he says, leaving another mark lower, mapping his way towards your chest. Calloused fingers come up to cup one of your breasts, thumb swiping over your nipple through your stays. You catch hold of his hair, yanking a fistful of that flaxen blonde, clenching your thighs together.

“What are you doing?” you hiss. 

Bakugou looks up at you, expression annoyed. “Consummating.”

“But you’re not undressing me,” you say. “And shouldn’t we—on the bed?

Bakugou raises a blonde eyebrow. “They tell you it needs to be on a bed, too?”

You blink, momentarily disarmed. It was quite literally called sharing the marriage bed—where else were you supposed to do it?

“Are you sure we’re talking about the same thing?” you eventually ask him.

Both of Bakugou’s eyebrows shoot for the moon, and he looks very suddenly like he wants to laugh. A grin yanks at his mouth, sharp and beautiful.

“I knew you’d be a fucking handful,” he says, his tone somehow both annoyed and delighted. “Don’t even know what the fuck you’re talking about and you’re still trying to give me orders.”

You yank at the fistful of his hair you’re still clutching and he hisses, hand shooting out to grab yours. He works your grip off of him, pinning your wrist to the wall. The air in the room suddenly feels a hundred times thicker, like trying to breathe through honey.

“Listen closely, Princess,” he tells you, leaning in. “We're going to consummate, alright. But I’m not just gonna squeeze my eyes shut and stick it in. I’m going to do what I want first, and you’re going to be good and let me.”

Your face ignites in flame. You want to disagree reflexively. “If it’s going to be painful I’d rather just have it over with, if you don’t mind,” you say.

Bakugou stares back, scarlet gaze roving over you. “It’s not gonna be if you shut up and let me do what I want.”

You blink. You hadn’t heard that there was a way around the pain—why hadn’t anyone told you?

“I—really?” you ask.

Bakugou nods. “Really.”

“Oh,” you say. “Well then… you may proceed, I suppose.”

“You suppose,” he echoes, staring you down. The look on his face makes you want to lean forward and bite it off.

“Well get on with it,” you say, arching your eyebrows.

Bakugou looks for a moment like he wants to shake you. But he ducks his head instead, lowering his mouth to yours again.

“Gonna fuck that bossiness right out of you,” he mutters, low like he’s promising himself and not you. But then he kisses you again, muffling your gasp in his mouth.

You’ve never kissed another man, and do not have a frame of reference for what he’s doing. But Bakugou is a good kisser, you think. Every flick of his tongue feels like someone has uncorked champagne and poured it beneath your skin, and every brush of his mouth against yours sends a liquid heat racing through your veins.

You moan into his mouth when calloused fingers delve beneath the collar of your gown, dipping into your stays and pinching a nipple. He rolls it carefully, and you arch against him without any say-so from your brain. 

“Been thinking about this, Princess,” he says. “Ever since I saw you in that little nightdress. Gonna show you what it really means to be with a man.”

You’re excused from answering by his mouth back on yours. Not that you think you could, with the way his fingers feel in the cups of your stays, or the press of a strong thigh between your own.

“Bakugou,” you gasp when he peels off of you, only to sink to his knees before you.

“It’s Katsuki,” he says, busying himself with the hem of your skirts. 

“B–Katsuki,” you say. “What are you doing?”

Long fingers roll up the hemline of your dress, then yank at your underthings, exposing you to him. You gasp again, moving to cover yourself, but Bakugou pins you to the wall with an arm across your stomach, catching your thigh and pulling it over his shoulder.

“Husbandly duties,” he replies, another smirk on his mouth.

And then your head thunks against the wall as that mouth moves, pressing to you.

“Katsuki!” you shout, biting off into an embarrassing moan when he laves over you. No one had told you about this part—about how a man’s mouth there would make you feel like fireworks had just been lit off in your veins. About how a man’s mouth could even go there at all.

Bakugou doesn’t reply, kissing you there as he had your lips. A delicate suck from him over the cleft of you has you arching in his hands again, and you can quite literally feel him smirking against you.

He works you thoroughly, licking and sucking for what feels like torturous hours, but must only be minutes, until you’re a writhing, panting mess, only held upright by the arm he has banded across your lower stomach. There’s a pressure rising within you, pooling in all your limbs, making you shake and shiver with it, and what feels like no way to release it.

“Katsuki—I feel strange,” you say, bucking against his mouth. “Oh—oh!”

“Just hold on, sweetheart, and let yourself feel it,” Katsuki tells you, before licking back over you. A finger presses up inside of you, foreign but strangely good in conjunction with his mouth. Then another one presses in and they curl as if seeking something, making you twist in his grip.

And then something makes you jerk—the press of Katsuki’s fingers inside you in just the right spot, while he sucks on you, feeling like he’s touching the same place inside of you from both sides.

Something inside you snaps, uncoiling, pleasure flooding down you like a mudslide. You cry out Bakugou’s name, tears in your vision, riding out your pleasure against his mouth. Bakugou licks you through it, groaning low in his throat with appreciation.

“That’s it, Princess,” he says, tone rough. “Now you’re ready for consummation.”

You hear his words as if through a haze, and it’s only once you’re moving—being picked up and carried over to the bed—that you register what he’s saying.

He frees himself from his breeches, and stretches out over you, kissing your mouth. You’re embarrassed to taste yourself on him, but the press of him to you overrides that concern. In one smooth stroke he presses in, and you are shocked to find that he slides home easily, your core slick and ready.

It feels strange, but not at all unpleasant—absolutely nothing like what they’d told you.

“You alright, Princess?” Bakugou asks.

“I—yes,” you say, voice fluttering off when he flexes his hips, moving inside of you. The slide of him inside of you is unexpectedly good, especially when he lowers a hand to your core, pressing a thumb to that bundle of nerves at the hood of you.

“Feel good?” he asks, his eyes hot on your face. You cling to him, hips lifting into him unthinkingly as his thumb pets over you again, as he presses in and out of you a few more times.

You nod, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of saying it aloud.

He grins anyway, feral and fever-bright. His pace picks up into something faster, and you’re embarrassed to hear the slap of him against you, the eager way your body welcomes him in.

The band of pressure builds up inside you again, slowly, with every sure stroke of Bakugou inside you. He’s hot and hard and heavy over you, pressing you into the mattress, and the tops of his cheeks are flush with effort—the way he looks sometimes when he’s just come in from the training pitch.

He’s beautiful—handsome and strong and hot-headed and determined. And it dawns on you that he’s yours now—not just your subject but your husband, your prince consort, and now your lover.

It makes all your skin turn molten hot again, especially when you look down and see your knees have rucked his shirt up. You can see the flex of his abs as he thrusts between your thighs, all that golden skin and dense muscle.

The slide of him inside you and the sight of him over you is suddenly too much, and you feel yourself tip right over the edge again. Bakugou catches your hand as you lift it to muffle your cry, kissing over your knuckles.

“That’s it, Princess, that’s it,” he says again, ducking his head to kiss you.

You moan into his mouth as he fucks you through it, and he groans with the clench of you.

“Feel so fuckin’ good,” he says against your lips, pace picking up faster. “Knew you would, sweetheart, yeah.”

Embarrassingly you feel almost like you could come apart again with the praise. Bakugou groans once more, and you can hear his grip tighten in the blanket next to your head. His hips buck and flex, wildly uncontrolled now, until he gives one final hard thrust.

His weight pins you down when he relaxes over you, his breath tickling over your shoulder. You find you like the weight of him on you, covering you, like a shield against the rest of the world.

Apt, for a general.

“Better than how you wanted to do it, wasn’t it, Princess?” he asks, smug.

You scoff, but you catch the flash of a white grin in the corner of your vision. There is really no question that he’d had the better of it, this time.

“Knew you’d see it my way,” he says.

Over him, you can hear the flutter of feet outside the door, some muffled discussion. Heat rises to your face when you realize the castle aids most definitely heard you cry out under Bakugou’s ministrations. There will be no doubt of your consummation now, regardless of whether you were observed.

“Nosy fuckin’ perverts,” Bakugou says, rolling off of you. You catch another flicker of his chest with the way his shirt gapes, and he looks doubly smug when he notices.

“Not done yet, angel?” he says.

“I am, thank you.” You flush, embarrassed at having been caught. But Bakugou stretches an arm out to yank you over him, pressing you down over his hips.

Your stomach flutters.

“Give me a couple more minutes, Princess,” Bakugou says, scarlet eyes flashing with heat once more. His hand raises to trail through your hair, catching in the wedding hairstyle they’d pinned you into. 

“Five more minutes,” your new husband promises you, with a grin like the devil. “And then we'll give them something to really listen to.”

[moonstruckme]

love of my life, queen of all things smut and marauders..........I have a request if you don't mind 😈 I was thinking of this with Sirius, but it could truly be whoever you think fits. But what do you think of a fic where reader x Sirius have sex for the first time (FWB, relationship, whatever fits the vibe), and Sirius finishes and moves his attention to reader who goes "oh it's alright, I've never been successful at that part of sex before...." & then it becomes this fun challenge for Sirius who spends the rest of the evening finding out what works for her until he finally gets her off 😃 xoxoxoxooxoxoxo

Thanks for the request and for weathering the long wait gorgeous Elle <3

cw: smut mdni, reader is afab and has trouble with orgasming

fwb!Sirius x fem!reader ♡ 1.2k words

“Fuck.” Sirius’ forehead crashes into yours, his breath hot on your lips. “Are you close?” 

“You should come.” Your voice is tight, strained, though not nearly so much as his. 

“Not before you.” 

“Please, Sirius.” You both moan as he thrusts deeper inside you, your legs squeezing tight around his middle. “Please, I want you to.” 

“I don’t—shit.” 

His brow tenses along with the rest of him as he spills into you. You feel the condom fill up with a heady satisfaction. You run your hands up his back soothingly, until he relaxes into you. 

“Fuck, gorgeous.” Sirius tilts his face to kiss at the slope of your cheek. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think I would…you just feel too good, have you gotten that complaint before?”

You laugh. “It’s not usually a complaint.” 

“No, but in this case…” He tuts, picking his head up to look at you. You expect to be self-conscious—it’s your first time seeing each other like this, and part of you is still fighting the urge to cover up and preserve your modesty—but the heavy drag of his gaze only makes you feel admired. “Well, anyways, sorry. How close are you?” 

“Oh, it’s okay.” You smile at him. Your finger traces the line of a tattoo on his bicep. “Don’t worry about it. I had fun.” 

Sirius blinks, and then his brows come down. “Hold on, that’s not fair. I want to get you off.” 

“Sirius, it’s really fine. I’m not…” You hesitate. You and Sirius have been friends for a while; it’s not as though you haven’t shared secrets before. And given what you’ve just shared with each other, you shouldn’t probably be embarrassed, but… “I haven’t exactly been…successful at that part of sex before.” 

Sirius’ eyebrows furrow as though he doesn’t quite understand what you mean. 

“I haven’t come,” you clarify. 

His eyes widen, lips parting. It’s horrendously attractive, worse with him still inside you. “You haven’t?” 

You shake your head. 

“Not ever?” 

You shake your head again. 

“Not even by yourself?” 

“Let’s just assume the answer to all of these questions is going to be no.” He shifts in you slightly, and you squirm. “Can you…?” 

“Oh. Yeah, sorry.” Sirius pulls out of you, looking somewhat awed. “So, forgive me, but what exactly are you getting out of this if you don’t expect to come?” 

You give him a droll look. “I guess I’m just a giver.” 

It’s more true than you let on. You enjoyed yourself more than you expected just now, watching Sirius come, knowing it was the sight of you and the feel of your flesh under his hands that did it. You hope he lets you do it again.

“I don’t have to come to have good sex,” you say in a more genuine tone. “It’s still fun for me.” 

“Right. Right, yeah, but—” 

“Listen, I’m only telling you so you don’t take it personally. It’s not a you thing, it’s just…” You gesture helplessly. “I’m not sure I can.” 

Sirius looks indignant. “I’m sure you can.” 

“I haven’t found any proof.” 

“Well, it’s—there’s a first time for everybody, doll. Can I try?” 

You sit up, drawing your legs closer and forcing him to sit back. “I told you, it’s not you.” 

“It could be me, though.” He grins roguishly. 

You roll your eyes, fighting a smile. “Don’t make this a pride thing.” 

“I’m not. I’m not, babe.” Sirius scoots towards you. He looks at you, sincere. “But it could be any number of factors, you know? Maybe you just haven’t tried the right thing, or there’s a lubrication issue, or something. It would be fun to try.” 

You rub your lips together. “It’d probably be a waste of time. And I don’t want you to be disappointed if it doesn’t work.” 

“I won’t be,” he promises. He crawls toward you on the bed, taking your ankle in hand to tug you closer. Your heart riots at the sight. “Let’s waste some time, gorgeous. I’ve got nothing else to do tonight. And you said you have fun even if you don’t finish, right?” 

“Right,” you admit. 

Sirius grins, flashing canines. “Lay back, then. Let me play with you a while.” 

It doesn’t take long to figure out that lubrication is not the issue. Between Sirius’ hands and his mouth, you’re spilled like warm honey across his sheets in minutes. He bites marks into your thighs, goes from gentle to masochistic to gentle again with his hands on your breasts, curls his fingers inside you so that you make sounds you don’t recognize. All the while, he calls you sweet names rolled up in taunts, making your cheeks burn and your body seem to give up any will of its own. It begins to feel cruel; the combination of who Sirius is and what he can do to you.

But it’s when he uses his tongue that you start to tremble. 

Your hand clamps blindly down on his shoulder, caught between keeping him close and pushing him away. Sirius’ hum, heavy with smugness and intrigue, is a vibration like you’ve never felt before. He takes your clit into his mouth. 

It’s altogether too much and not enough. You shift your hips, gasping, but after a while your breaths even into a steadier pant. You start to adjust to this new pleasure. Just when you think you’ve got it under control, you’re safe, Sirius slips his wicked fingers into your entrance again. 

“There you are.” His voice thrums with satisfaction as he kisses your clit. “You’ve been so good, sweetheart. So patient.” 

“Sirius, I—”

“What?” 

“I feel—” 

“What, pretty girl?” 

“Sirius.” 

“Okay, I’m sorry. I’m being mean.” He nibbles ever so gently at your clit, making you jolt away from him. Your walls clench around his fingers. “You’re just so much fun when you’re worked up like this, I can’t help myself.” 

He curls his fingers into that torturous spot along your inner wall, and what you want isn’t more sensation, but you can no longer find the words to tell him so. You dig your nails into Sirius’ shoulders and squeeze your eyes shut, feeling on the precipice of something great and terrible. Some kind of wreckage. 

“You’re okay, doll,” Sirius soothes. “You’re just fine. You like this, don’t you? Don’t you want to come?” 

With his low, sweet question, you do. You wreck like a ship against the shoreline. Splintering, screaming, crashing and drowning. Sirius laughs like the enemy vessel as you do.

It’s some time later when the stars clear from behind your eyes. You let out a shuddering breath. “Fuck.” 

“Mhm. That’s usually how it goes.” Sirius is all tenderness now. He kisses up your sweaty, overworked abdomen until he reaches your collarbone, where he nibbles rewardingly. “Good job, sweetness. And good job me, if I do say so myself.” 

You open your eyes to peek at him through your lashes. “Aren’t I supposed to say so?” 

He chuckles, pressing a kiss to your chin. “Fairly sure you just did. I wouldn’t have guessed you had sounds like that in you.” 

“Me neither,” you admit. 

“Well, now I’ve got something new to work towards, I suppose.” 

“Sirius,” you sigh. “That was the first time I’ve ever come, and it took nearly an hour. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to do that again.” 

“Oh, such a defeatist.” Sirius cups your face in his hands, thumbs moving sweetly down your cheeks as he presses a firm kiss to your lips. “I meant getting those sounds out of you again. But don’t worry, gorgeous, we’ll manage both.”

[science-hoes]

Safe & Sound

Jack Abbot x Reader

Warnings: PTSD, panic attack, hallucinations, graphic descriptions

Description: A stormy night in Pittsburgh causes Jack Abbot to fall into a PTSD-induced psychosis episode, and the reader does everything in her power to bring him back.

——

The night shift was slow in the Pitt (but you didn’t dare mention it aloud). Aside from traumas coming in by ambulance, there weren’t many patients in Chairs. Nobody wanted to go out in the severe weather that night. The winds howled against the building, creating ghostly whispers with the rain that slapped concrete.

You were fascinated by the unusual weather. Usually, if it stormed at all, it was quick with little fanfare. But the system moving across Pennsylvania tonight had every local news station showcasing their meteorologists like it was coverage for the Olympics. In fact, that’s what the TVs in Chairs had on constant loop since you arrived for your shift.

Gloria had reminded everyone at shift change of the protocols in case of severe weather, usually reserved for blizzards. Backup generators, spare on-call rooms, yada yada yada.

But the storm outside was majestic. So dangerous yet so powerful. Something about it intrigued your deepest curiosity. You could only see the flashes of lightning from the exit to the ambulance bay, but the growling thunder supplied a nonstop soundtrack for your shift.

“We’ve got a high school basketball player coming in via ambulance after passing out during a game. He’s conscious again after some IV fluids but still needs some electrolyte labs and monitoring. About five minutes out.” The charge nurse snapped you out of your daydreaming.

You quickly sat up and nodded. “Yes, ma’am. I’ll head on out there.” You replied.

The nurse raised an eyebrow. “You mean in that hurricane?” She questioned.

You shrugged, standing up from your desk. “I’ll stay under the bay. Don’t want them to get lost in all this rain.” You joked.

The doors to the ambulance bay glided open as you approached them. You snatched a sterile gown and tied it loosely around your waist. Finally, you were able to stand outside and watch the storm. The sky lit up with magnificent cracks of lightning followed by rolling thunder, and the rain was thick enough to blur the bar across the street, only its neon “OPEN” sign visible.

You heard the automatic whirring of the doors behind you, along with wet footsteps trudging through the tiny river formed by the slope of the bay combined with heavy rain. “You’re gonna catch a cold if you wait out here.” The voice warned.

You peaked over your shoulder to see Jack Abbot wrapping a sterile gown around his waist to match yours. You rolled your eyes. “Thanks for the advice, grandpa.” You teased.

Jack scoffed, coming forward to stand beside you. He assumed his usual soldier stance, broad chest puffed out, arms crossed behind his back, head held high. “I’m not old enough to be a grandpa.” He defended.

You smirked, admiring the way the lightning in the sky reflected off his silver curls. “You look like you are though.”

Another look of disbelief washed over his face, his mouth agape at your audacity and those whiskey eyes rolling back. You couldn’t tell if he was seriously offended or not. “I look exactly my age.” He said.

“Which is…?”

“Classified.”

You giggled, and he couldn’t help but smile as his eyes remained fixed on the path to the ambulance bay. The red lights of the rig danced off the pools of rain in the street as it approached. The sirens were nearly masked by the looming thunder. Suddenly, the wind picked up, blowing the rain horizontally. You screeched as the freezing water drenched you head to toe in a matter of seconds, but laughed at the cathartic feeling. Jack held his hands over his forehead, trying to shield his eyes, a practiced maneuver he learned for billowing sand instead of water.

“It’s just some water, you won’t melt!” He called out to you, his voice fighting to be heard against the gusts of wind.

You flashed a grin at him and hurried over to the ambulance as it rolled under the cover. “Come on, old man!” You yelled back.

The EMTs hopped out and pulled the gurney out of the back, trying to work quickly in the rain. Within seconds, it was clear that speed had no benefit in the situation. Every single person, including the young patient, were soaked from the monsoon.

As you introduced yourself to the basketball player, a flash of lightning, more brilliant than the others, nearly blinded you. The ensuing sound wasn’t like the rumbling thunder that had plagued the night, but more of a deafening crackle. After you regained your senses from the sensory overload, you could see the flag pole sizzling, burning hot at the top.

“Holy shit!” You screamed, standing straight after realizing your body naturally cowered to the ground in response.

The rain had plastered your hair to your face, obstructing your view, so your hands gripped onto the metal rail of the gurney as you helped push it inside. “Let’s go!” You screamed, leading the way to the automatic doors.

Once you were out of the rain, you swiped the hair over your forehead and gave a smile to your patient. “Sorry about that!” You said. “We don’t usually waterboard our patients before treating them.” You teased.

The kid laughed and wiped the water off his face. “It actually felt pretty good. I was really hot.” He replied, but you noticed the shivers hitting his body from the cold air of the Pitt.

You pushed the gurney with the EMTs into Central Three at the instruction of the charge nurse. “Are you cold, baby?” You asked the patient, using the same term of endearment that you used with all pediatric patients.

He nodded. “Yeah, just a little.” He underplayed, his teeth involuntarily chattering.

You tilted your head to the outside of the room. “I’ll go get you a warm blanket.” You offered.

The rest of the team began to help the kid move to the hospital bed, and you began your journey to the linens closet. You turned the corner to the secluded room in the corner, a bit inconvenient when every room had to have new sheets after every patient.

The scanner beeped at the proximity of your badge when you pulled it from its reel, and the lock illuminated green to grant you access. You opened the door and stepped in, making a beeline for the coarse, white blankets.

But you heard breathing. Loud breathing. Fast breathing. In the darkness, only illuminated by a distant fluorescent light, you spotted a body slumped in the corner of the room. When you stepped forward, the squeak of your Hokas on the wet floor alerted him. His head snapped up.

You saw a ghost. Pale, clammy skin. Eyes blown wide. Breathing anything but normal. But you recognized the reflection of the silver hair in the light.

“Doctor Abbot?” You called his name, unsure if the apparition was truly your stoic attending.

His breathing was staggered but quick. Too quick. “I think I was hit.” He grunted.

You noticed his hands putting pressure on his abdomen. You ran to his side and placed your hands over his, still beaded with raindrops. “Let me see.” You ordered. “From the rig?”

His hands only pressed down harder, refusing to let you move them away from his injury. “No, no. It needs pressure.”

“Doctor Abbot, please move your hands so I can help you.” You demanded, your tone hardening.

He shook his head, grunting through pain, sweat and rain dripping from his forehead. You grabbed his wrists, trying to pry them, but your strength was nothing compared to his. “I can’t. I can’t.” He mumbled over and over.

You finally grabbed his face, squeezing firmly on either stubbled cheek. “Jack. Look at me. I need you to listen to me. I’m going to help you.” You said. “But you have to let me.”

Jack’s bronze eyes focused on yours, looking for any signs of danger, any signs of an enemy. Finally, he reached up with one hand to your wrist and pulled it down to where his other clutched his abdomen. You peeled the damp black shirt up, revealing rippled muscles and stainless steel dog tags hanging around his neck. In another situation, you would have spent an eternity trying to memorize each toned crease of his upper body.

He hissed at the air exposure, throat flexing his Adam’s apple to hold in yelps of pain. But the further you went up, the more you realized what was going on. He had been putting pressure on a deep, ragged scar. One that was no longer pink but beginning to blend into its surroundings, stretched like a lightning bolt across his skin, twisting and turning, mirroring the ones in the night sky. The pads of your fingers brushed against the slightly raised marks, and Jack let out a strangled cry of pain.

“Jack.” You breathed.

But he wouldn’t look at you. His chest heaved, and you knew he was going to get dizzy from hyperventilating. He clutched the dog tags around his neck.

“My name is Lieutenant Colonel Jackson Abbot. I was with the-“ he cut himself off at another wave of pain. “O Neg. I’m…I’m O Neg.”

“Jack. Baby, look at me.” You tried the term of endearment like you did with pediatric patients, just like you did with the patient back in Central Two.

No change. The sounds leaving his lips were desperate and frightened. Finally, you grabbed his face again, forcing him to look in your eyes. You could see that he was far, far away. Not in this place. Not in this time. A psychosis episode.

“I saw…I saw Simmons. He got hit in the neck, and…” He trembled, voice cracking like a teenage boy’s.

“No, Jack. No. You’re here with me. We are in Pittsburgh. We’re at work.” But your words fell on his deaf ears.

You felt powerless in that moment as well. You were an emergency room resident for fuck’s sake, but you had never seen a PTSD-induced psychosis episode, not like this. Standard protocol would’ve been an injection of haloperidol to reduce hallucinations and alleviate his agitation. To sedate him. But that would draw administrative attention to Jack, and something deep in your chest told you to keep this as private as possible.

Without wasting another second, you took in a deep breath to your chest, expanded your soft palette, and began to sing.

Just close your eyes

The sun is doing down

You brushed your thumb up and down his grizzled cheek in the same tempo as your words. Jack didn’t react to the touch, but his eyes fixated on your mouth as your lips moved.

You’ll be alright

No one can hurt you now

Your other hand came to rest on his bare chest, over his heart, icy hands sending a shiver across his warm skin.

Come morning light

You and I’ll be safe

And

Sound

Your soft mezzo voice drifted away in the silence of the room. Jack’s breaths had more depth now, more consistency. His glassy eyes reminded you of a recently passed patient, devoid of life and emotion. But he wasn’t hyperventilating anymore.

Just when you thought he might be coming back to your reality, he reached into the pocket of his cargo pants. With tears in his eyes, a new addition to his wrecked appearance, he handed you a concealed pocket knife. “I need to to stab me in the foot.” He whispered in between pained grunts.

You shook your head, pushing his hand away. “Jack, I told you. Listen to me. You are in Pittsburgh, and-“

“I know where I fucking am!” He cut you off through clenched teeth, threatening to crack at the sheer force. “I have a prosthetic right foot, and I need you to stab it like it’s a fucking snake. I need to see you do it.”

The desperation in his voice was unsettling as he shoved his pocket knife back to your grasp. You hesitated for a moment, but his next cry of pain spurred you into action. You took the knife from his hand, brushing your fingers against his rough knuckles, and switched the blade out of its safety position.

“Right foot.” You said aloud as your oriented yourself to make sure you didn’t slice the wrong foot.

You reached for the hem of his right pant leg to expose his leg, but Jack jerked back. “No!” He snapped. “It doesn’t work if you do that. Just stab my foot.”

What a fucking crazy situation. His chest heaved, dog tags glistening in the dim fluorescent light. The look in his eyes would haunt your dreams forever. The pain, the desperation, the helplessness.

Finally, you drew your arm up and came down with a searing force, the blade slicing through his shoe and coming to an abrupt halt as it met the titanium inside.

Jack let out a groan that you could only describe as orgasmic, the tension in his body dissipating. Your hand trembled as it let go of the pocket knife, stuck in his foot like an axe in a tree. Just like he said, it was a prosthetic. No blood, no additional yelps of pain.

Tears fell down your cheeks, and you took in a deep breath that you had been depriving yourself of. Then another. And another. And before you knew it, you were crying in full force.

Jack stared at you through heavily hooded eyes for a few moments, but then he reached out a shaking hand. “Come here.” He breathed. “Please.”

Wordlessly, you accepted his offer. He wrapped his arm tightly around you, concealing you against his warm body. For the first time since you entered the room, you realized how cold you were from your soaked scrubs and cold hospital air. One of your arms wrapped around his back, and the other rested on his shoulder. The hot tears from your face began to roll his chest, a sensation that helped ground him further.

When your own cries began to wane, Jack grasped your hand on his shoulder. “I’m sorry I made you do that.” He whispered, pulling your knuckles to his lips.

Your eyes remained fixed on his foot, pocket knife sticking out. A sight you had seen in many other patients before for one reason or another. But not like this. Usually in a real foot.

You had heard about stories like this before. Amputees needing mirror therapy or acupuncture to get rid of phantom pain. Once before, an old attending of yours from med school told a story about a veteran who needed his prosthesis stabbed to confirm that it wasn’t real, that he couldn’t feel the pain.

Jack shifted, reaching for his right pant leg, and pulled up. You moved out of his embrace, away from him. He froze, eyes fixed on you like a hawk.

“Please.” He whispered, with a desperation that differed from his tone earlier. “Don’t leave.”

Your eyes met his, and it was a new vulnerability that you had never seen before. Like he was scared. Not psychosis-induced.

“I’m not going to leave you alone.” You promised, and moved back to the opposite end of him, settling on your knees at his feet. “Can I help you?” Your fingers brushed at the hem of his cargo pants.

Jack let out an exhale of relief and slumped against the wall again, tension leaving his shoulders. His silence was confirmation. Slowly, you rolled the wet fabric up, up, up. Until metal ended and his skin began, around his knee. There was an obvious strap that kept the prosthesis in place, and you tugged it loose. Carefully, you removed the artificial limb, and he let out a slow exhale as the pressure changed.

You realized that most of the prosthesis was a socket for his shin, that his amputation was below the midline of his tibia. He absentmindedly reached for the prosthesis, and you handed it to him so he could set it aside. Your hands hovered over the newly exposed skin.

“Does it hurt?” You asked.

Jack sighed. “Just aching. It always aches.” He mumbled.

Your eyes flicked up to meet his. “Can I…?”

A question you couldn’t finish. You didn’t know how. It felt weird to ask. Bordering inappropriate or offensive. But still he nodded, knowing the end to your intimate request.

Your fingers slid against his skin, pushing deeper and deeper. Massaging the truncated muscles. Kneading against the scar line from the closure. The tiniest sounds of relief fell from his lips, and if you had listened closely enough, not as focused on helping him feel better, you would have heard your name involuntarily falling from his lips like a prayer.

“Am I hurting you?” You asked, unable to decipher his sounds of pain from pleasure.

Jack shook his head, swallowing hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat. “No.” His voice was hoarse. “No, it feels…”

He wanted to say ‘good.’ But the truth was that it didn’t. It still hurt. Still ached. But not as intensely. You were numbing him. Distracting him. Pushing the pain into different areas to give the hotspots a break.

“I was discharged six years ago…” He breathed.

You shook your head. “No. You don’t have to explain.”

“We were away from camp. Routine checks in the field. Then, an IED…” He swallowed hard. “I didn’t know what had happened at first. I didn’t have a seatbelt, so I was thrown from the Jeep. Simmons was, too. The rest of them…they burned.”

You had halted your soothing hand motions unconsciously, listening to every word, every breath like your life depended on it.

“Simmons had shrapnel to the neck. Carotid was lacerated.” His voice began to shake again. “I was the only survivor.”

The silence that followed was heavy. Jack didn’t look at you, just stared up at the ceiling, trying to forget the memories he recited to you. His hand traced over the wretched scar that slithered across his abdomen, his fingertips brushing against the uneven skin.

“I heard an explosion tonight, and…I was there again. In the sand. Bleeding out.”

The confirmation to your diagnosis. PTSD-induced psychosis. In that moment, you were grateful you hadn’t gone to get help. You weren’t equipped to handle the situation yourself, but…

“And you brought me back.” His voice cut through your thoughts. “With that siren call.”

Jack had that half smile on his face, the one you had seen only a handful of times when he thought you weren’t looking after he’d whispered praise for a risky procedure. Your heart skipped a beat, but you matched his smile sincerely.

“Music makes new paths in the brain. I thought I could reach you that way.” You explained.

His lips pulled up until his smile was complete this time. “Like a fucking angel.” He mused. “Grabbing my deformed ass from hell.”

The compliment seeped into your chest, and you knew he could see your blush in the low light. In a surge of bravery, you leaned down until your lips brushed again his knee, searing a kiss against the skin. Then another, a little lower on his shin. Another below that. And one more on the ridged scar.

His breath shuddered at the foreign contact, and you felt him shift under your touch. Your name passed his lips, louder this time, in the same cadence of his prayer from earlier. Your doe eyes locked on his as you pressed a final kiss on his scar.

“You are not deformed.” You scolded, rubbing a hand up his shin. “You’re perfect.”

—

A/N: Thank you for reading!! This will probably end up being a two-part fic with the second part being more focused on the reader reminding Jack how beautiful his body still is, if you know what I mean 🤭😮‍💨

[ventismacchiato]

OIKAWA AS YOUR MUTUAL THAT YOU HATE IRL

oikawa x gender neutral reader

you and toru have been mutuals on twitter for almost a year as you both run and met through twice fan accounts. you talk to him more than your irl friends atp. on the other hand you and oikawa don’t get along irl, as you’re both on opposing college teams and constantly competing for nationals. since then he’s always picked on you at games, but that all changes when you finally decide to meet your favorite oomf in person.

notes — karasuno is a mixed gender team in this to keep it gn, and instead of highschool these are college teams / the messages in the first section are like throughout the week before you two meet up

ooc idk? it’s been a while. assume everyone is 20ish, i cud make this a cute mini au one day but rn i’m lazy so this is fast paced

also here’s the soobin version i wrote a while ago

__________________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Your stomach was swarming with nerves as you made your way inside the cafe, the scent of freshly made coffee and sweaty college students from the stadium surrounding you as you slid into line. Admittedly, you never thought you'd get the chance to meet Toru, he was just your cute internet friend and nothing would ever happen.

That was, until today.

It was a bit embarrassing that you stared at the selfie he'd sent for longer than you should've. It was difficult to comprehend the boy you'd been talking to for so long was hiding such a pretty figure. Even with the emoji hiding his face you could tell he was cute.

You eye the display of cakes and decide to pick one up for the both of you as Toru had already promised to get you guys coffee. You felt bad going empty handed after finally meeting him.

You reach down to grab onto the last chocolate slice and your hands meet another. Usually, you'd let it slide and choose something else even though you touched it first. But, when you looked to your left and locked eyes with your self-proclaimed enemy, Toru Oikawa, those thoughts washed away. You were going to fight for that slice of mediocre cake.

"Not you again," Oikawa sighed, tugging the slice towards him, "Don't be obnoxious."

"Says you," you scoff, tightly grabbing onto the plate, "Why are you always so rude towards me? Is it because we annihilated you in the game?”

"You were just lucky," He grins, his large hands tugging the cake closer towards him, "Choose something else.”

"You choose something else. Losers don’t deserve nice cake! I got to it first!”

"Ok and?" Oikawa questions, like the little shit he is.

"Fine, just take it," you sigh, not wanting to make Toru wait. Good Toru, not this evil one beside you. But as you let go of the cake and step back you notice Oikawa’s outfit. He was adorned in clothes that oddly resembled the photo Toru had sent you.

"You made me lose my appetite," Oikawa mutters, dropping the cake and shuffling past you. You shake off the familiarity and make your way towards the back. Most men wore the same clothes, it was nothing.

__________________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

__________________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

You eye the walls of the cafe until you come across the wooden tables from the photo.

You start scouring the seats for someone that resembled Toru but the only person in your vicinity was Oikawa.

You inch your way closer towards him with morbid curiosity, hoping that your suspicions would be proved wrong. But as you got closer the drinks on the table and location of your rival were too similar to the photo Toru had sent you.

Unfortunately, Oikawa locked eyes with you.

"What do you want? Are you here to apologize?" he questions, playing with the straw of his drink as he barely gave you a glance.

"Toru? From twitter?" you tentatively ask, your voice hoarse from the nerves. This couldn't be happening.

Oikawa pauses.

"What?" he slowly asks, turning to look at you, "What did you call me?"

"Oh my god," you gasp, "Are you ruluvyeon?"

"What..," he starts, catching on, "You're urmomoyn?"

Your username sounds foreign on his tongue but it was him. Oikawa was your Toru. Evil Toru was your sweet Toru.

Your beloved Toru was the same guy you've been on bad terms with all year. Just your luck.

Before Oikawa could comprehend anything or you could answer, you decide to do the most mature thing anyone would do in that situation.

You run.

And he doesn't follow.

__________________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

a week later

__________________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

The street was dark apart from the flickering lamps on the side of the walkway as you made your way towards Oikawa - or well Toru’s - house. It still felt odd.

Your palms felt clammy and you were clad in your pajamas, in too much of a rush to change. Which was a decision you were regretting since the flimsy fabric did nothing to protect you against the wind.

Before you knew it you spotted the complex Toru supposedly lived in, and as you walked closer you could see his tall figure waiting for you in the dark. It would've been rather creepy if not for the fact he was drowning in a large hoodie and sweats with a beanie tugged on his hair.

His arms were crossed across his chest as he rocked back and forth due to the cold.

You swallowed your nerves and made your way towards him, not quite knowing what to do with your hands other than give him an awkward wave as he spotted you.

"Hey," he breathed out, gesturing for you to follow him inside.

The warmth of his apartment was far more welcoming than the freezing night. He shut the door behind you both and tugged off his beanie as he gestured for you to sit down.

"Hi," you greeted back as you sank down on his couch. The entire place felt very lived in.

Toru’s face scrunched up into an sly smile.

"I missed you," you added, "I'm glad you reached out."

"I am too," he hummed, reaching out to take his hand into yours. His palms felt warm against your own freezing ones.

"What was your last text about?" you question as his thumb rubs circles on your palm.

"I don't know what you’re talking about?" he smiles, "What did I say?"

"You know damn well what you said," you huff.

"Okay, well I meant it," he answers, "I convinced myself to try and forget you since you were an online friend. But having you right in front of me changed things."

"Changed things how?" you say, warmth creeping up your cheeks.

"Well, for one I can actually see you," Oikawa notes, "And do things like this," he adds, his voice going quiet as he reaches over to push a loose strand of hair behind your ear. "And, instead of fantasizing about kissing you, I could actually do it."

"You fantasized about it?" you ask in disbelief, still flustered at the touch of his hand so close to your face "You didn't even know what I looked like!"

"You were kinda just a blob in my mind," he shrugs, a smile tilting his lips at your offended face.

"A cute blob though, right?”

"Of course."

“You never imagined me as my icon?”

“Only when you changed it to Gojo.”

“Oh fuck off,” you laugh.

"So, you really don't hate me?" you muse, playing with his fingers, "It's so weird seeing you be so gentle."

"Would you rather me go back to being rude?" he replies, "But I really don't. I feel a shitty at how I used to treat you. You just get me riled up.”

"It's okay, I did the same," you assure, patting his hand, "Let's start fresh."

"Okay," he agrees, clasping your hand in between his, "Let's go out."

"Straight to the point?"

"I don't think we should waste any more time," he replies, “And my entire team thinks I made you up.”

“I need to make it up to you,” you sigh.

"Kiss me and consider yourself forgiven," Oikawa easily grins, looking at you with the usual look of arrogance he sends you through the net when he wishes you a terrible game. But this time it looks different. Like he wants you to win.

“Alright,” you manage to croak out, your throat closing up at your false confidence.

Honestly, you were qute irritated with yourself on how you treated Oikawa for the past few months. You desperately wanted to move on and start fresh.

Oikawa let out a surprised laugh and you wanted to ingrain the sound into your mind. He brought up his free palm to his mouth and let out a small giggle into it.

“Go ahead then,” he smiles.

"Okay," you manage to say, taking a deep breath.

"Any day now,” Oikawa smirks.

"Shut up, I need a moment-," you started, but were interrupted as he reached over and yanked on your top to slot his lips against yours. He stumbled and you both fell backwards onto the couch as he caught himself above you, both knees outside your hips as you snaked your hands around his waist.

He stared at your for a mere moment in disbelief before leaning down to capture your lips with his. His lips felt pillowy against your own and his warm body right on top of yours made it feel just as good.

You had to remind yourself not to laugh into the kiss.

[mossangelll]

Late Night Call

pervy man x innocent reader blurb

a/n: change of pace from my usual arcane fics, i was thinking about some anime boys and well…yeah

been a while since i’ve watched some of these animes so i’m hoping my picks aren’t too ooc than they already are >.>

enjoy ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

cw: dubcon, noncon, nsfw - mdni 18+

his call comes late at night, rousing you from sleep when you hear your ringtone going off.

“o-oh, hey? what’s up?”

your voice drips like honey, so sweet and slightly rough from being woken up and he just knows you’re rubbing sleep from your watery eyes, none the wiser to what he’s doing on the other end of the line.

he tells you he’s feeling…ah, under the weather and he just needed a friend to talk to but don’t worry if you’re tired! he would absolutely hate to disturb you and he’s already lost too many friends from talking about his feelings.

needless to say, he’s got you hook, line and sinker. he won’t even be doing much of the talking.

easy prey.

his hand palms over his rock hard dick, it’s been that way since the mere idea of this popped into his head, as he listens to you chatter away about something he couldn’t care less about; he isn’t even trying to hide his breathless panting and the non-stop wetness of his dick, sloppy with precum, thrusting into his tight fist. the tip throbs an angry red as he holds back his release again and again and again just so he can continue getting off to your cute voice.

at some points, you ask him if he can hear some noises too and for a moment his heart stops and he wonders if you’ve caught him red handed.

but then he remembers that it’s just you, coddled and blissfully unaware of the sin that surrounds every aspect of life, so all he has to say is that his tv is on in the background and you’re back to talking again. perfect.

his blood is pumping red hot as his strokes grow uncoordinated and even more furious than they were before and he finds himself fighting the urge to ask you what you’re wearing. no that’s too much, too soon, so he instead chooses to bite down on his lip until the taste of iron fills his mouth. a small price to pay.

“helloooooo still there?” you call out after ten minutes of him being seemingly unresponsive, assuming he’s finally managed to fall asleep. you don’t bother to end the call, after all you know how comforting it is to sleep with your friend still on the phone after a bad day.

he imagines shoving his dick into your wet mouth mid-sentence, cock growing impossibly harder at the mental sight of your surprised face, you gagging because you’re unaccustomed to a dick his size - scratch that, any dick and all the debauched things he would teach you.

eventually he hears your gentle snores, of course you fell asleep before the main event, throwing his head back and grunting way louder than he did before knowing you definitely won’t be waking up. his chest heaves and legs shake from the orgasm that overwhelms him and he almost ends the call from the guilt rising inside of him - almost. but then he catches sight of his thick cum splattered right where your contact photo was and his cock twitches as if he didn’t just come seconds ago.

good thing you didn’t end the call; he decides he can have a little more fun with (or without) you - he still feels a bit under the weather, of course.

——————————————————————————

tomura shigaraki, dabi, takami keigo, togata mirio, kai chisaki, l lawliet, kei tsukishima, koshi sugawara, kenma kozume, satori tendo, yuji itadori, satoru gojo, denji, chrollo, hisoka morrow, shalnark, katsuya serizawa, reigan arataka

masterlist

[meelusinee]

NOW SHE HAS ME UNDER HER SKIRT | M.R x READER

word count \ 3.7k | fluff & stuff | slash / mattheo riddle x reader

in which mattheo is absolutely in love with you before you two even talk for the first time (part one to lovesick!mattheo) author's note at the end!

part one | part two | part three | part four

NOW SHE HAS ME UNDER HER SKIRT | M.R x READER

Mattheo didn’t know much about love. 

Between being raised by a dictator and his craziest follower, he already didn’t have a very good start. Especially whenever he would get in trouble, the Cruciatus Curse was definitely no joke. Not to mention everyone pestering him about the legacy he led. News flash to the Gryffindors who would try to pick on him, he found it quite obvious that he was Voldemort’s son.

Suffice to say that he didn’t know much about love. He never had a true showcase of it, never had an example of it to compare to anything. The closest he ever had being another stunted teenager by the name of Theodore that considered him his brother, but even then there was still distance.

That was until he met you.

You, the most beautiful person he had ever met in his entire existence on this Earth. Anything he  lol looked at on you he would find absolutely perfect, from the color of your eyes to the way your hair bounced in the sunlight.

That alone made it hard to approach you. Your nice demeanor seemed to make it even harder.

So, he settled with admiring from afar. Mattheo knew your schedule, the classes that you would take and every time that it varied. He would subtly watch you in classes, hang around the same areas you did during your break periods, or even where you went for fun. And, to the best of his ability, he tried to avoid things that looked bad. No more fights or cursing, not unless he was truly provoked.

His mind also got its grubby hands on the idea of a journal. A place he could write about you freely, one he charmed so only he could read it. Entries, song ideas, anything he could think of. You made him an artist, you as his perfect muse.

And it all got even better when you two finally met.

You had just walked down to the courtyard, Mary Janes clacking along the rocks as you made your way over to a small pillar.

Recently, you noticed someone sitting by the pillars a lot more than usual. He was tall, his face usually covered by his brown curls as he wrote inna small journal he always carried with him. Said tall man with a face covered by his brown curls was your current potions partner, you had both been assigned to create a Liquid Luck potion.

“Hello?” you called out gently. face tilted down just a bit as you looked down at him. His eyes locked with yours when he looked up, the most beautiful shade of molten honey you had ever seen meeting your eyes. “Hi there, stranger.”

“Hello?” he whispered back at you, eyebrows furrowed as he spoke. His face looked rather cute when it was all scrunched up like that, a light blush covering his cheeks.

“I’m your Potions partner.” you said with a smile, flattening your skirt before moving to sit down next to him. “For the Liquid Luck project.”

“Oh,” he whispered, nodding as he closed his journal. It had a rather pretty leather cover, the pages aged and covered in ink from what you could tell. “Yeah, I remember. Y/N, right?”

“Yeah,” you smiled, nodding. “And you’re Mattheo.”

“Yes I am.” he said, a soft smile coming on his face as he heard that. He looked at you with something special in his eyes, eyes that carved themselves deep into your soul with the most intricate patterns you could think of.

The trance both of you seemed to be stuck in was broken when he cleared his throat, fingers tapping on his journal. “Did you have any ideas for the project?”

“Oh,” you whispered, nodding. “Yes, yes I do. I was thinking that we head to the library and research different potion methods and whatnot. Based on Slughorn’s instructions, I’m assuming that the instructions in the books won’t help much.”

“You’re a genius.” he whispered, barely loud enough for you to hear.

“What was that?” you asked him, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“Nothing,” he said, clearing his throat as he began to sit up. “Do you want to go now?”

Mattheo thought that he was dreaming, if he was being honest.

The girl of his dreams, the girl that he had wrote almost obsessively day and night about for almost six years, that same girl was currently sitting across from him. Laughing.

“You’re ridiculous,” she smiled at his joke, her voice sweet like a piece of cotton candy melting on your tongue. He didn’t even remember what he had joked about at this point, his mind turning to mush the moment he heard that sound pass your lips.

Those lips that haunted his dreams every single night, the image of them so plush and pure he wanted to worship them like one would a holy angel. They looked absolutely perfect.

“Thank you,” he whispered, smiling softly as he rested his chin on his hand. He probably looked like a lovesick puppy, but he didn’t mind. 

“I found something really interesting in this book  by the way,” you said, Mattheo’s eyes instantly darting to where your hands were resting on the page. “It says in the recipe that we need to juice a squill bulb, which most people just cut it for. But this recipe here notes that squeezing ingredients over a funnel gets more juice out.”

“That’s really interesting.” he whispered, his gaze looking at your face as you spoke. 

“Isn’t it?” you asked with a smile. “And here it says that adding the entire Murtlap makes the potion last longer, rather than just growth.”

“That’s also really interesting.” he whispered again, gaze still stuck on your face. You looked so pretty whenever you were concentrating on things, the way your eyebrows furrowed making him think of a million different songs and rhythms. 

“Is it?” you asked with a chuckle.

“Well,” he muttered, looking at you with a small smile on his face. “I always found Potions an interesting topic.”

“Always is not a word. It’s more of a concept.” you said, humming as you continued reading the pages. Mattheo chuckled softly, looking at you like a lovesick puppy.

“You’re lovely,” he whispered. 

Theo was sitting in his bed reading a book, his curtains almost completely closed as he flipped between page to page. At least, he pretended to.

Recently, he had noticed Mattheo’s obsessive journaling habits. How his hands would be covered in ink by the time he was finished, or how he’d write until his new candle burnt out. Sometimes Mattheo would write even when the candle burnt out, instead opting for yet another one.

It was rather concerning to Theo, to say the least. Out of all of the things Mattheo could do, he was changing who he was. Self-improvement was one thing, but it seemed like he changed an obsession from fighting to writing.

“I can feel you staring at me.” Mattheo mumbled, looking back over at where Theo was sitting.

“I’m surprised you can,” Theo said under his breath, closing his book and standing up. “With how much you’ve been writing, I’d assume you get sucked in by a black hole sometime soon.”

“Oh hush,” he whispered, looking up from the journal. His hands were stained black and red with quill ink, the candle beside him still burning brightly. “Why do you keep staring at me? You’ve been doing it all week.”

“Your journal.” Theo smirked, walking behind Mattheo and placing his hands on his Mattheo’s shoulder. “What’s inside?”

“Why would I tell you?” Mattheo grumbled, continuing to write in the journal. Theo’s eyes squinted as they tried to read whatever was on the page, but the words were too jumbled to make any sense to him. No doubt a charm.

“You charmed the journal?” Theo asked curiously, looking down at Mattheo.

“Like you care.” he whispered under his breath, the quill scratching loudly against the paper. The room was quiet other than that, nothing but the quill scratching and the candle crackling.

“I do.” Theo said, his voice a bit more stern. He pulled up a chair next to Mattheo, resting his elbow on the table. “Mattheo, you’re pushing everyone away. Even me, and it’s not healthy. All you do is write in this journal, it’s kind of worrying.”

“I just like writing,” Mattheo whispered, moving his legs to rest his knees near his chest.

“About what?” Theo asked, his voice more soft than teasing.

“You’ll judge.” Mattheo whispered again, flicking the quill back and forth as his eyes glanced over at Theo. “Why do you want to know?”

“Because you’re my best friend.” Theo whispered. “I promise I won’t judge.”

Mattheo sighed before turning to the journal, pressing his wand against it as the words came into view more clearly. His handwriting was a lot more cursive than Theo first remembered, no doubt changing the more he wrote. 

“It’s a journal about her,” Mattheo whispered, flipping through some of the pages. “Love letters, poems, songs and stuff.”

“Her?” Theo asked curiously. “Who’s her?”

“Her,” Mattheo muttered to Theo, picking at his fingernails as he spoke. He looked like a blushing schoolboy who found his first love, it was rather cute to watch. “It’s, like, she’s a girl I just really like. I think about her a lot, you know? And I’m just trying to improve myself for her.”

“What’s her name?” Theo asked, resting his head against his hand as he crossed his legs.

“Y/N.” Mattheo sighed, like the word itself was a part of some holy prophecy. “She’s so beautiful, you know? Like something from heaven, just beautiful. And I just can’t get her out of my head.”

“Have you ever tried talking to her?” Theo asked, a small smile on his face.

“We have this project together right now.” he said, chuckling softly as he spoke. He was so down bad. “She took me to the library to research more about potions. Merlin, she’s so smart Theo. She figured the reason why nobody could make the potion was because the instructions were wrong.”

“So you both started researching?” Theo asked.

“She researched, yeah,” Mattheo said, before chuckling again. His hand moved to scratch the back of his neck nervously. “I kind of just sat watching her the entire time.” 

“Mattheo,” Theo chuckled softly, shaking his head. 

“You said you wouldn’t judge!” Mattheo protested.

“I’m not judging.” Theo chuckled, looking down at the journal. “I’m just confused on how you think you’ll get your girl if you can’t even talk to her. Journaling can only go so far.”

“I know,” Mattheo whispered, looking down at his journal again. “But it still helps.”

Theo nodded, looking down at the journal again. “What are you writing about right now?”

“Uh,” he muttered, looking at the pages. “It’s a song. She said something at the library that made me think of a song, I haven’t been able to get it out of my head.”  

“What’s it sound like.” Theo asked, leaning back in his seat.

“Uhm,” he whispered, picking at his nails again as he pushed the journal towards Theo. He hummed softly as he picked it up, eyes squinting as he tried to read his handwriting.

Darling, just calm with your voice

Let your heart sing, how I always enjoy 

When you say “always” is not a word

You think love is a bit absurd.

“That’s really nice,” Theo said, looking up at Mattheo with a small smirk. “This is a lot better than I thought it’d be, to be honest.”

“What did you think I was writing about?” Mattheo asked confusedly.

“Dark magic or something.” Theo chuckled softly, shaking his head. “Like you were possessed by a ghost to figure out how to resurrect themselves.”

Mattheo chuckled at that, taking his journal back. “I think you’ll find someone like this, you know. It makes life really nice.”

“Being in love?” Theo asked, an eyebrow raised.

“Yeah,” Mattheo whispered. “In love.”

“Well, there’s always an opportunity for that. And when it happens, it’ll happen.” Theo said, patting his pockets and pulling out a box of cigarettes. “But until then, there’s cigarettes.”

“You know the way to my heart, don’t you?” Mattheo snickered at that, using the lit candle to light his own cigarette.

It had been a couple of weeks since you and Mattheo had started working on your project. You had figured out how to maximize the efficiency of your potion brewing, including changing methods of brewing and preparing ingredients. After about three different trials, you had finally found the perfect way to brew the potion. 

“That’s perfect.” Mattheo smiled softly at you, chuckling softly as he scratched the back of his neck. In all honesty, it looked like a regular potion to him. “I think that’s perfect, right?”

“That is perfect.” you said, giggling softly as his reaction You found it rather cute, if you were being honest. He seemed rather nervous around you. “Thank you for doing all of this with me, the potion work and all. Most people would probably just leave it to me, you know?”

“Why would they leave?” Mattheo asked, eyebrows furrowing.

You shrugged, looking down at the potion still set in the cauldron as you spoke. “I don’t really know. I guess people consider me weird or something like that. Someone said that I was whimsical once, I don’t think it was a nice way though.”

“That’s absolutely ridiculous.” Mattheo spat. He couldn’t understand the logic of that. In his eyes, you were absolutely perfect. He would give anything in the world to hang out with you more often than he got too, and people gave that up for free? The thought was absolutely ridiculous.

You chuckled quietly at that, smiling softly. “Yeah?”

“Definitely. I mean,” he paused, looking up at you like that was the most absurd thing in the entire world. He had a small flush on his face, no doubt questioning what he was going to say. “I mean, you’re such a nice person. And I think that hanging around you is comforting.”

“And I think that you’re rather sweet.” you chuckled, looking at him with a soft smile.

“I’m being serious!” Mattheo said, looking you in the eyes. You hadn’t heard him talk this much in the entire time that you had been working with him, and you especially didn’t expect it to be him defending you. “You’re just, like, you. Which is really sweet, you know? I really like you and your whimsy, or whatever they try to call you.”

You giggled again, smiling softly at him as you scooted a bit closer. “You’re rather nice yourself, if I do say so myself.”

“Thank you.” he whispered, his voice raising a pitch as he looked at the potion. “Do we need to test this?”

“I think so.” she nodded. “Do you want to do it?”

Mattheo looked at the potion, a small frown coming on her face. If anything went wrong with the podcast, he wouldn’t want you to be hurt by it. Which led to him nodding, the best option for him obviously being him taking the potion himself. 

“I’ll bottle it for you.” you said, grabbing the small ladle and pouring it inside the potion vial. “Here, one vial of Liquid Luck for you.”

Mattheo smiled softly as he took a sniff of it. “Is it meant to smell like something?”

“No, just air. I mean, clean air. Not like toxic air or anything.” you said, before ending your small speel. “It doesn’t smell like anything.”

Mattheo nodded again, taking a swig of it before coughing. “That’s definitely hot.”

“It did just come off the cauldron.” you chuckled, fingers fidgeting slightly. “Do you feel lucky?”

Mattheo looked up at you with a look you could only describe as a lovesick puppy, a small flush covering his face as he admired you. You could only assume the amount of thoughts running through his mind were plenty, some very hard to sort through. 

“Yeah,” he whispered, blinking slowly as he looked at you. “Very lucky.”

You chuckled softly at that, your face flushing as you watched his eyes lock onto your lips. “Do I have something on my lips or something?”

“No,” he whispered softly, his Adam’s Apple bobbing as he spoke. “No, I just,”

“Something on my teeth?” you asked, shining your teeth to him.

“I want to kiss you.” he whispered. 

Your mouth closed again as you heard that, eyes locking onto his after he spoke. That didn’t last long though, as his eyes focused back on your lips again. “You what?”

“I want to kiss you.” he said a bit more clearly, his voice hoarse as he spoke. “I mean, I don’t want to pressure you. But I really want to kiss you.”

“You can kiss me.” you whispered softly to him, scooting a bit closer to him in return. 

Mattheo blinked for a couple of seconds, the shock of your answer plastered on his face. It filled you with a small sense of confidence, the blush on his face fueling your own. “I can?”

“You can.” you smiled.

Mattheo smiled brightly at that, the burn of it brighter than the sun sucking his lips in like a blackhole would. His lips immediately met yours, burning like fireworks against his skin. It was absolute bliss to him, burning through his skin and turning him into nothing but lovesick ash.

“Your lips are absolutely perfect, my love.” he whispered, his eyes boring into yours with a gaze full of adoration. “So perfect.”

“Was your luck to try and kiss me, Riddle?” you chuckled softly at him. 

“This is the luckiest moment of my life.” he whispered. 

“Theo!” Mattheo spat out, opening the dorm room door as he stormed in. His palms looked sweaty, and his face was absolutely covered in a bright blush. 

“Mattheo.” Theo said his name back, closing his book as he looked at where Mattheo had stormed in. He looked absolutely wrecked, almost drenched in sweat. “You look like you just got your ass kicked on the Quidditch field.”

“I just,” he whispered, walking closer to Theo as he paced around the room. “I just kissed her.”

“Y/N?” Theo asked, a small smile crossing her face. “You kissed her?”

“It was so perfect.” he whispered, laying down on Theo’s bed. “Like, it was like her lips had a magnetic pull on me. I couldn’t stop for the next hour. A whole hour!”

“That’s wild, mate.” he chuckled softly, patting Mattheo on the head.

“It was just perfect,” he whispered under his breath, sighing softly. “Like, I don’t know how else to describe it. Maybe like looking at a supernova for the first time.”

“You are down bad, Mattheo.” he chuckled softly at that, continuing to pat his friend on the head.

“And then we, after that right?” he said, the smile on his face only growing larger. “We snuck off to this broom closet. You know the ones. And we did, we had,” he paused, sighing in frustration as his words jumbled in his head. “You know?”

“I know.” Theo chuckled.

“I have a song idea again.” Mattheo said, sitting up again as he rushed to the journal he kept so dearly to his heart. “I will be dead to the world for the next few hours.”

“You want me to go tell Y/N that, lover boy?” Theo smirked.

“She can come in whenever.” Mattheo said, dipping his quill in black ink. “I already gave her our dormitory password.”

“You what?”

“I have a present for you.” Mattheo whispered under his breath, a small smile on his face as he walked towards you.

It was the 6 month anniversary of one of the happiest relationships you had ever been in. There was communication and there was love. Small dates near the Black Lake at midnight, with breakfast you stole from the Great Hall earlier. Times where he’d take you into town and let you dress up however you wanted, all on the cards he stole from Malfoy. Or small get-togethers like this, hangouts at the top of the Astronomy Tower. 

And the presents were always lovely. Small poems that he wrote for you, or love letters that he hand wrapped himself. A small blush or dress you had been eyeing for more than two seconds, or room decor that went with your forever indecisive aesthetics. 

“You do?” you giggled softly, gasping softly as he pulled out a small guitar. “A song?”

“I’ve written a couple for you,” he whispered. “And I wanted to sing them to you. For our anniversary.”

“I love you.” you giggled, smiling as he sat down.

He cleared his throat as he made sure the guitar was in tune, strumming a few chords before eventually developing a melody. It seemed almost hypnotic the way his hands moved, his voice humming along as he figured out the rhythm.

“Yesterday, I was a word. Left with no voice to speak it,” he hummed softly, his voice and the guitar both vibrating through the walls. You smiled brightly as you heard his voice, not realizing how pretty his voice actually sounded.

“Now I am a happy song, placed on the lips of a woman.” he sang, winking at you. He continued for a few lines, a small smirk growing on his lips as he got to the instrumental part.

“What are you going to sing next?” you asked, watching him giggle softly. “Seriously!”

“Patience,” he whispered, chuckling as he strung the melody again, his eyes darting down at the guitar. “Now she has me, under her skirt,”

“Mattheo!” you flushed, slapping his arm and breaking the rhythm of his song. “My skirt?”

The both of you burst out into a laugh at that, the sound breaking through the cold night air that breezed through the alcove you sat in. Or maybe you just felt warm in his presence, a constant feeling of love rushing through your body.

“Can I finish my song now?” he smirked.

“I suppose you could.” you whispered, resting your head on his shoulder as he continued to sing.

AUTHOR'S NOTE

my second post oh my GOD this one took a hot minute to get through. beta-reading and proof reading is definitely not my jam, and there's definitely things that i missed in this. but i hope it still works out well, especially the whole lovesick angle i was going for. if you guys haven't already, please please please go check out tamino's music. it is actually so. good. if you listen to hozier or adrianne lenker, i think you'd really like his songs (my favorites are the first disciple and habibi)

if you would like to read the second part, click here!

as always, please like, comment, and reblog! it really helps out, and i really appreciate everyone who does! if you guys have any requests or something you can request in the ask box!

[chelseeebe]

yours, forever

18+ mdni. smut. mean!exhusband!eddie;) breeding kink if you squint a lil

a/n: i was not expecting to post again so soon but this genuinely couldn’t wait lol. i have another parts to this little piece so lmk if you’d like to see it. someone posted a really really good exhusband!eddie fic like a month ago and ive lost it, but they inspired this entire thing!

^it was this post by @madelynraemunson !!!

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗

eddie wasn’t expecting to find you standing on the other side of the door, nor had he expected you to barge right past him and into his kitchen. 

you seemed to show up with zero rhyme or reason, typically wanting something from him. 

that was fine, appreciated even. 

he just wasn’t a fan of you waltzing into his home with the sole purpose of talking about your pig of a husband. 

“david wanted me to ask you if he could take the kids up to washington to see his parents,” you stand awkwardly at the kitchen island, his apartment a shell of the house you once owned together. 

eddie pauses, launching the dish towel onto the counter and laughs, deep and gravely as he swings back around, ���no.” 

“why not?” you huff, blinking expectantly at your petulant ex. he’d always been a sucker for your eyes, divorce couldn’t changed that. 

“because i said so,” leaning against the marbled counter, “he asked you to ask me and i said no, that’s it. done.” 

“you’re being stubborn,” crossing your arms over your chest, scolding in the way you talk to him. 

“i don’t care.”

“eddie,” stepping forward. 

“sweetheart,” his tone disapproving as he also steps up, closing the gap between you, “no,” enunciating the word in hopes that you’d actually understand now. 

“don’t be an asshole,” you frown, a couple years ago you’d pout and get your own way but now eddie found great satisfaction in telling you no.  

“i’m not being an asshole, you asked me a question and i answered, dave can go to washington, but you and my kids can’t,” his lip twitching into a dastardly smirk. any minute now you’d crack, really let loose on his ass. 

“oh, so now i can’t go? who the fuck are you to tell me what to do?” poking your sharp finger into his chest, a fury behind your eye that almost instantly made him hard. 

“the father of our kids? or have you forgotten about that?” 

“unfortunately not,” rolling your eyes, nonetheless you make no effort to leave, your bag already on the counter, signifying that what he assumed would happen next was definitely going to happen next. 

“you don’t mean that,” sidling closer, trapping your body between the counter and his chest, “because if you did, you wouldn’t let me keep fucking the shit outta you.”

eddie’s rock solid now, this was foreplay for him, getting high off of the way you argued with him, degrading him right to his face. 

“shut up,” rolling your eyes to the back of your head, fingers curling into the hem of his shirt, “you’re so pathetic,” glancing down at his boner now pressing against your cunt. 

“mmhmm,” he wouldn’t fight it, in fact, he’s proud of it, “only for you though,” finding your hips, palming at the doughy flesh. 

your lips twitch and he knows he’s won this fight, planting your lips to his, a firm hand on his chest just to remind him who was really in charge. 

sighing into your mouth as you move against him, his hands running beneath the seam of your skirt, feeling his way up the backs of your thighs to settle on your ass. 

“eds,” you hum, pulling away from his lips, “i’ve gotta go pick the boys up,” making zero effort to stop the inevitable, your chest flush against his.

“well better make it quick this time then,” he growls, walking your body into the countertop, manhandling your body to face you against the hard counter, pressing up against the swell of your ass. his belt clinks as his jeans fall down around his thighs, boxers following behind. 

“this is.. i have to go,” you gasp, rolling your head back to allow his lips room to find your neck, nuzzling right into his favourite spot just tucked underneath your jaw. 

“then why don’t you leave?” his gruff voice vibrates against your chin as his hands slide underneath your shirt, spilling your tits from your bra to get a full handed grope of them. 

your hand rests atop of his, the other gripping to the countertop for dear life. 

you’re not going to leave, that much is obvious. eddie’s also fairly certain that you’ve got at least an hour before you have to go. he’s not stupid, you play the game just as much as he does, pretending to leave just to pounce on him straight after. 

“that’s what i thought,” sarcastic as ever, threatening to score violet splotches behind on your neck, though his lips detach before he’s able to. 

eddie lets his thoughts slip back to the reason you’re even here, letting himself get frustrated by your blind audacity all over again. 

“you must be fucking stupid coming in here, asking me shit like that,” his large, calloused hand pawing at your tits, the other yanking your panties down to hang around your thighs. 

“no i’m not,” arguing back though you’re completely docile, allowing him to bend your torso over the marbled countertop, his hands groping your plush skin. “he’s my..” sigh, “husband now and you need to- fu-uck respect that,” fingers curling around his arm, pinching at the skin when he slides inside with no warning. 

“what was that?” eddie mocks, slamming into your cunt with little remorse, full of years of pent up frustration and a tiny dose of regret. 

once upon a time, this was his everyday. having you absolutely anywhere he wanted, and now it was solely reserved for times you really needed him to agree to something. or perhaps david had done something stupid, as he often did. sending you running back to eddie like a feeble little deer. 

“shut up,” sighing in time with his rough strokes, the sound of his hips slapping against your ass echoes through his barren kitchen, filthy sounds of sex wailed through his apartment far more often than they should. 

before you’d met david, he’d see you once a week while dropping the kids off, maybe he’d get to taste you a couple times a month, if he was lucky. it was only after you remarried that you’d come around unannounced, asking about something that most definitely could’ve been a call. 

eddie doesn’t care, you’re the only woman for him anyway, a couple divorce papers couldn’t change that. 

“you fuckin’ love it,” he growls, grabbing a fistful of your hair and fiercely tugging your head back, “y’gotta drive all the way over here just to cum, ain’t that sad?” speaking low right into your ear, his arms keeping a strong hold of your torso as your knees grow weak. 

“you don’t.. you’re- fuck you,” knuckles glowing white with your grip on the counter, other hand desperately nuzzling between your thighs, circling your neglected clit. 

“have to speak up honey, i can’t hear you,” the tip of his cock nudges against your soft spot, eliciting a strangled mewl from your pretty wetted lips. 

“i can make myself cum,” you speak proudly through gritted teeth, voice bouncing around with every slam of his hips, “i don’t need you,” rubbing your clit harsher, as if to prove a point. 

“oh yeah? show me baby.. let me see you cum,” slowing his strokes but keeping his cock firmly enveloped inside, jaw clenching with every squeeze and quiver of your cunt. 

eddie palms your tit, getting as much satisfaction from this as you were. your whimpers alone could make him cum, hell, just a look and he was rock solid in his jeans. 

“oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck,” gasping into the air, leant back against his shoulder, head turning to hide in the nook of his neck as you teeter over, waves of pleasure shocking your body. 

“shit,” he grunts underneath his breath, feeling you writhe around in his arms, “that was good sweetheart, my turn,” resuming his assault on your cunt, breath stuttering as his hips begin to rock again. 

his hand replaces yours, slipping between your thighs to find your clit, thrusts becoming sloppy and weak as the blood rushes to his head, sending his stomach into a series of somersaults. 

even in your separation, your pleasure came first. an important pocket of information wayne had awkwardly handed him when his voice started cracking and girls no longer had cooties. 

you’re putty in his arms, fully relying on the countertop to keep you upright, thighs quivering with the intensity of your orgasm and the anticipation of the quickly approaching next one. 

“oh.. my.. god,” whining with every thrust, your voice thick with lustrous air, too fucked out to stand or even think straight. 

“i’m gonna, sh-shit cum sweetheart,” pounding recklessly into your trembling pussy, dripping in a mixture of your juices. 

you clench around him, tipping over the edge once more, barely able to hold yourself upright with shaking knees and a harsh grip of his arm. 

eddie isn’t, nor had he ever been one for pulling out, he liked running that risk, the thrill of maybe knocking you up again. 

three kids don’t happen without at least one accident, that’s for sure. 

he doesn’t now, pumping the thick ropes of his release into your cunt, groaning belligerently as he does so. praying to god this was the time it stuck, pregnant with his child once again. 

you fall flat against the counter, heaving for breath with the last of his pathetic strokes, growling into the stuff air. 

he slaps a harsh palm to your ass for good measure, trailing his hand down your trembling thighs, “so you run along home now and tell him exactly what i told you,” fingering the lace of your panties as he hikes them back over your thighs.

“no.”

[lilhughesy]

Sunshine Smiles | Luke Hughes x Fem!Reader

warnings! slow burn (ish), friends to lovers, mentions of SA (please skip this one if this makes you comfortable!), underaged drinking, fighting, brief mention of blood, toxic ex boyfriend. word count: 13.2k

summary: Luke and Y/N have been best friends after sharing a science class together, and always have been just friends... right? They go through the adventures of high school together, dating other people but it never seems to work out because what if the person they have been looking for has been right in front of them this whole time?

a/n: oh boy, this one has been in the works for a while, especially with having 8 final exams this month! but here we go! first Lukey fic! I hope you like It <3

You and Luke met in sophomore year of high school, you had biology together and sat beside one another in the seating arrangement. The two of you would make small talk at the start of every class, the casual “how are you?” or “did you watch last night’s game?” but not anything more than that. It wasn’t until you noticed him struggling with the genetics unit where you asked him if he needed help.

Usually, the two of you would sit quietly and scribble down notes into your booklets throughout class. Luke with one ear bud in while the teacher talked. He was pretty good at keeping up with the material being taught, but with his hockey season picking up — both the school’s team and his club team, he started slowing down.

You noticed how he would space out about 15 minutes into the lesson, often looking towards a spot on the ceiling rather than at the whiteboard. Minutes would pass before he would snap out of his daze temporarily before slipping back into his daydream. You couldn’t blame him though, biology first thing in the morning wasn’t pleasant.

“Do you want to copy my notes?”

His eyes widened at your question before he nodded, “Please, that would be great.”

“Do you have time during lunch? I assume your schedule is pretty busy after school.” You asked him, towards the end of the period, “I’m flexible for basically anything.”

“Yeah, lunch works for me or after school on like Thursdays and Sundays — I don’t have any practices then.”

You scribbled down your phone number on the corner of your page before tearing it and handing it to him, “Sounds good! Just text me.” You said with an easy smile.

The tips of his ears turned a faint shade of pink as he took the slip of paper from your hands. He hummed a small response before turning back to focus on the teacher.

Well, realistically, he was flustered that you gave him your number that quickly. Luke had expecting you to give your Instagram or Snapchat, like any other high school student would do. You weren’t extremely popular in your grade, but that doesn’t mean that people didn’t know you. People knew you as the sweet girl, you constantly wore a smile and treated everyone you talked to like a friend. Everyone was comfortable around you, and honestly no one had anything bad to say about you. Other than the girls who were jealous of your easygoing personality that had different guys talking to you. Anything they said behind your back was typically dismissed, no one actually believed what they had to say about you.

Luke first noticed you in the midst of the fall semester of his freshman year. He saw you standing a few lockers down from his, talking to two of your friends. You laughed, your perfect teeth shining through at whatever your friend told you. One of his own friends, greeted you as he walked past you, “Hey Y/N! How have you been?”

“Hi Dylan, I’m good! How are you? How’s your sister liking college?” You asked back to him. The two making small talk before he waved goodbye and approached Luke,

“Hey Hughesy,” Dylan said, leaning on the locker door next to Luke’s, “Ready for geometry?”

“Yeah.” Luke nodded, following Dylan as he lead his way to the math wing. Luke looking behind him once to take another look at you before walking to his class. You looked at him when he did, and you gave him a small smile.

You made it look so easy, to know everyone who knew you. You made people feel seen, remembering small details from past conversations with them that others would have easily forgotten by then. Just like how Luke forgot that he had mentioned how he grew up in Toronto and enjoyed watching the Leafs play during a random conversation during ninth grade. You brought it up about two weeks into your shared biology class, asking him “Did you watch the Leafs game last night? It was a great game!” He was shocked, slightly confused, that you knew that he liked the Leafs. It allowed you two to fall into a short conversation before the lesson began that day.

After you started helping Luke out with catching up and understanding the biology lessons, the both of you became friends — outside of just being seat partners. He found himself texting you more frequently outside of school. Conversation came easy and they never felt forced, which he appreciated. They were never awkward or uncomfortable, it was like you two knew each other for years.

You two had shared two more classes in the spring semester of tenth grade, quickly falling back into routine of being study buddies. He claimed it was to help him stay on top of schoolwork because he was so busy with hockey. In reality, he knew it was because he liked being around you and listening to you talk when you explained the topics to him. He swore that you taught significantly better than any of the teachers he had, something about the way you talked about it made it click in his head. Maybe it was because you managed to make a reference towards sports every time he was stumped, allowing him to grasp a better understanding of it.

Before either of you noticed, you became best friends. Considering how you two would spend your lunches in vacant classrooms to study, whether it be you teaching him or just hanging out together. You appreciated your new friend, Luke Hughes, who had actually took his time to get to know you. Of course you loved talking to other students in your year, but you weren’t blind to the fact that they didn’t really pay attention to you. Conversations often swirled around them and their lives, not so much your own. They never really cared to ask you about your break or the other things going on in your life. You didn’t really mind, you liked to keep to yourself.

Until it came to Luke, who got the time to know you for you. He knew that you also watched the Leafs since your mom grew up in Ontario, or how you would visit Canada during winter break each year to visit family, or even your slight obsession with Harry Potter. Luke learned that you didn’t like to wear your hair up often since you claimed to hate the way the end of your ponytails felt against the back of your neck — yet when it came to really focus on your work, your hair would be tied up to avoid strands getting into your line of vision. The conversations that flowed between the two of you were two way streets, not just the one way street that you had grown accustomed to.

As April came around, his hockey season started to trail to an end. Only allowing you two to have more time to hang out after school. The winter months had you two hanging out for an hour or two at either of your homes, typically working away at assignments beside each other. Now with the warmth of spring and less constraints of his busy hockey schedule, you two could do more together. With his home being significantly closer to the school than your own, you two would often walk to his house together once the end-of-day bell would ring.

He would kick around a rock on the sidewalks as the two of you talked. Sometimes it would be about your friends or his, other times it would be about random questions that you two would think about.

“Do you think that chicks in their eggs gain a sense of like consciousness which makes them want to break free of the egg?” You asked him, causing him to pause in his strides, “Like maybe they get super claustrophobic, you know?”

“What kind of question is that?” Luke laughed, before continuing his movements, “It is a good question though… Or it could be just a natural reaction or reflex to break free.”

You shrugged, “That too.”

Ellen loved having you around, she knew that you were a good influence on her youngest son. Her boys were never the academic type, always drawn towards activities like sports or games in general. She never expected for Luke to tell her about him spending lunches catching up on class notes or having a friend over to work on essays. She was surprised, to say the least, she expected him to be like his older brothers. Always hanging out with friends during lunch, complaining about having to do class work, or having friends over to play on the PlayStation and being typical teenage boys.

You were a bundle of joy and sunshine to her. Whenever you saw her, you would ask her about the book she recently read or ask her about what she was cooking in the kitchen. You were genuinely interested in conversations with her, not talking to her just to make a good impression.

“Hi honey!” Ellen’s voice sang out from the living room as you shut the front door behind you and Luke. He kicked off his beat air forces, placing them on the shoe rack,

“Hi mom, Y/N’s here too!” He told her. You following him towards the living room. She looked up from her phone, seeing her son and you standing in the doorway.

You smiled at her when she saw you, “Hi Ellen! How have you been? I’m sorry I came unannounced.”

She chuckled, placing her phone screen down on the coffee table, “You never have to worry about that, you know that I love having you here. Do you guys have any homework?”

Luke shook his head, “No not really, we caught up during lunch.”

“Wow, good for you two!” Ellen beamed, standing up from her seat, “Can I get you two something to eat as an afternoon snack?”

“We were planning on maybe walking over to the ice cream shop in a bit,” Luke explained to her, trailing behind his mom when she made her way into the kitchen.

“Are you sure? I just went to the store and I loaded up on groceries.”

“It’s okay, mom. Thank you though!” Luke said to her, “We’re probably going to head to my room to hang out for a bit.”

Ellen hummed, waving you two off as Luke led you to his room. He tossed his school bag towards his desk before flopping onto his bed. You placed your bag next to his, settling for his chair,

“So,” He propped himself on his elbows to look at you, “What’s up with you and Josh lately?”

You blushed at the mention of the boy’s name. He was on the lacrosse team at school and was in your shared English class with Luke. Josh knew you since middle school and started to talk to you more recently because of your shared lessons. You liked Josh as friend prior to this year, he was always nice to you and gave you his notes on days you were absent. It wasn’t until this year, when he seemed to have his teenage glow up with him getting a lot taller and growing out his blonde hair, where you started noticing him more than just a classmate.

“Nothing really,” You told Luke, who only raised a single brow, “We’ve just been talking.”

“Right,” Luke chuckled, tilting his head to the side, “So it has nothing to do with his long hair now and his defined jawline?”

Your face turned red, “What?! No, why would- If anything it sounds like you have a crush on him!”

“Who said anything about having a crush on Josh?” He teased, knowing he managed to put you into a corner.

“Wha- I just- I didn’t- I meant,” You sputtered out, before covering your face with your hands in embarrassment, “Okay fine! Maybe I have a bit of a crush on him.”

Luke laughed, his neck craning back, “Oh this is too good!”

“Shut up!” You whined, face still hidden away from the boy, “You act like you haven’t been talking Mallory!”

It was his turn to become flustered, “We aren’t talking though?”

“Yes you two are! I see you checking your notifications every five minutes, you waiting for her snap reply.” You giggled as his ears turned more red.

“I do not!”

“Yes you do!”

Luke groaned in defeat, “Can we call a truce on this?”

“Fine, but if you decide to ask her out, you have to tell me.” You told him and he shook his head slightly as a brief laugh fell from his lips,

“Same goes to you then.” He grinned, you rolled your eyes playfully, “Let’s go get that ice cream now.”

Luke had asked Mallory out a few weeks after. She played on the school volleyball team, and she was what you considered popular in your grade. Her and Luke became the new ‘it’ couple when they became official at the end of April. The hockey star and the cute blonde volleyball player. You were so happy for him, being the one who stood in front of him minutes before he asked Mallory to be his girlfriend — you were giving him a pep talk and hyping him up, giving him the confidence he needed in that moment.

They were a cute couple, he would sit next to her at her table during lunch with all of her friends. Somewhat ditching you to be with Mallory. He had fit right in at the table of athletes, mixed of guys and girls. You never blamed him though, his priorities moved around and you knew that Luke spending every lunch with you in a quiet classroom wouldn’t sit well with his new girlfriend.

You liked Mallory, she’d give you small smiles in the hallway and give you brief ‘hello’s’ when she came by Luke’s locker midst conversation between you two. You gave them space, not wanting to wedge yourself into their relationship.

So you remained as the sweet sunshine girl, talking to new people during lunch hour since you would rather socialize than to sit alone in a classroom. People would come by for a few minutes to talk to you before leaving to be with their own friend groups. You were never a fan of the cafeteria, too much noise and the stereotypical cliques of high school being extremely evident in the large room. Different tables for different groups. You much rather walk around the school, stand in an area with a small group of friends before continuing your way.

One person who seemed to consistently keep you company was Josh, the lacrosse player you had grown to have feelings for. He would stay with you for a good while during lunch, often jogging a few steps towards you with a call of your name.

“Y/N!” You spun around to the sound of his voice, you feel a smile grow on your face when he approached you.

“Hi Josh,” You said, giving the boy a wave, “How were your classes?”

“They’re good! Hey, I was wondering if you were busy after school today?” He asked you as the two of you walked as a leisurely pace by the outdoor track.

You glanced at him, trying to hide your brewing excitement, “I don’t think so, why?”

Josh let out a nervous laugh, his hand running through his hair, “I was wondering if you’d like to come to my game today, and maybe go get food after?”

The two of you had stopped your walk just moments before, him now looking directly at you. Josh’s cheeks were tinted pink as he waited for you to respond,

“Yeah, I would like that.” You smiled, moving a loose strand of hair out of your face.

He beamed, “Awesome! Oh, and you can wear this too!”

Josh quickly moved off one strap of his backpack to rummage through it, handing you a navy jersey. You took it from him, holding it up in front of you to see your school name on the front along with his number and name on it.

“It might be a bit oversized, but I think you would look good in it! But, I guess you don’t have to wear it if you don’t want to,” He rambled on, sort of laughing at himself whilst being embarrassed at his own behaviour.

You placed a gentle hand on his arm, “I’d love to.”

After that afternoon where you sat on the bleachers watching him play his game and the two of you going to a diner for a meal. He had finally asked you to be his girlfriend after multiple weeks of talking to each other in school and out of, hanging out together, and him walking you to your classes. You were ecstatic when he asked, feverishly nodding your head and excited giggles when you accepted.

You texted Luke later that night about it, he was happy for you. The two of you caught up for a little, given that you rarely spent time together anymore considering how things have changed. Neither of you seemed to want to talk about the shift in dynamic nor did either of you want to jeopardize your own or the other’s relationship.

Josh had stuck to your side since, walking around school with an arm around your shoulders to show off to everyone that you two were together. He brought you to his hangouts with his friends, where he kept you right next to him the entire time. Josh seemed to be more protective of you whenever you two would see Luke. Always pulling you closer or whispering something in your ear to distract you from the curly headed hockey player.

It was a few days before summer break, and for the first time since you started dating Josh, you were left alone. Given that his family had taken him on a trip, starting his summer break early this year. You stood by your locker at the end of the day, rearranging the things in your bag when a familiar person appeared next to you.

“Hey,” Luke said, leaning his back against the next locker, “Where’s Josh?”

You looked over to him, “I could ask you the same thing.”

“Mallory had a doctor’s appointment.” Luke responded, now waiting for you to reply.

“Josh left for his family trip yesterday.” You explained to him while zipping your bag, “How have you been Lukey?”

He chuckled, following you towards the exit, “I’ve been good, I’m excited that it’s almost summer.”

“Me too,” You grinned at him, the two of you falling into an easy rhythm, “Any plans this summer? I’m assuming you have hockey camp like always?”

“You know it,” Luke’s eyes softening slightly at you remembering, “And we’re going to the lake house for the whole summer when Quinn flys back on Saturday.”

“That’s so exciting!” You bumping your shoulder to his, “How have you and Mallory been?”

“Good, she’s really great…” Luke paused before letting out a small sigh, “I’m sorry that we haven’t been hanging out and for me kinda ditching you for her.”

You waved your hand off, falling into your typical easy going mood, “Don’t worry about it! I know you have my back even if we don’t talk every day.”

Relief washed over his face, “Okay good, I was worried you were pissed off at me or something.”

“No, never! Besides I’ve been busy with Josh and being around him all the time, so you also have the opportunity to be mad at me.” You told him, “Are you mad at me?”

“At you?” He questioned, “Never.”

The two of you walked in a comfortable silence, simply enjoying each other’s company. You reached the street intersection, both pausing momentarily,

“I would invite you over, mom has been asking about you and it’s been so long but you know…” Luke mumbled, “Mal wouldn’t be too happy.”

You gave him an understanding look, “Don’t worry, it’s not just Mallory who wouldn’t be happy about us hanging out.” You chuckled, referring to your protective boyfriend, “If I don’t see you before school ends, I hope you have a great summer, Lukey.”

He gives you a sad smile, “Thanks, Y/N. I hope you have a good summer too.”

You give him another short glance before heading your way back home. You hadn’t realized how much you missed Luke and hanging out with him. A sigh escaped your lips as you adjust the straps on your shoulders.

Luke watched you from his spot on the corner, seeing you slowly walk away to the direction of your home. In the similar head space, he wondered what happened to your friendship. Curious if neither of you were to be in a relationship, if you two would be heading towards his house in routine. He liked Mallory, of course he did. Though he somewhat hated that it was at the cost of your friendship. Luke knew that at the end of the day, you were always there for him — similar to how you acknowledged knowing that he had your back. He missed you nonetheless, he missed your random questions and the comfort of being in your solace.

He resented Josh, how he now had your full attention at all times. Luke would never say it out loud but he didn’t think Josh deserved you. He barely knew the lacrosse athlete but something about the way Josh carried himself, he knew something was off about him. Luke had just yet to put his finger on it.

Luke went home to see Jack already lounging on the couch, barely paying attention to the game on the screen and was much more interested in his phone.

“Hey Lukey,” Jack called out to his brother, Luke only mumbled a minimal response, “What’s up with you?”

“Nothing.” Luke sighed, grabbing his Gatorade bottle from the sleeve of his backpack and plopping into the empty spot next to the seventeen year old.

Jack’s eyebrows furrowed at Luke’s behaviour, “You sure?”

“Yeah.”

“What’s wrong with Lukey?” A voice asked, Quinn poking his head from the hall and entering the living room.

Luke’s head snapped up, breaking his focus on his water bottle, at his eldest brother’s voice, “What the hell?” Luke letting out a shocked chuckle, “What are you doing here, Q? I thought you were flying in on Saturday?”

Quinn grinned, pulling up Luke by his arm and hugging him, “Glad to know you missed me too.”

“Sorry, sorry,” Luke replied, embracing Quinn, “I’m glad you’re here.”

“I got an earlier flight last minute,” He explained to the youngest Hughes, pulling away so the three brothers could sit. Quinn taking the single seater next to the couch, “What’s going on with you?”

Luke shrugged, knowing that he couldn’t lie to both of his brothers, “I don’t even know, it’s just Mallory doesn’t like me hanging out with Y/N.”

“Y/N, that’s the girl who’s been helping you with school?” Quinn asked, making sure he was understanding Luke’s situation properly.

Jack nodded, “Yeah, she’s really cool. I’ve met her a few times. She’d been helping Lukey with school, his grades have never been better.”

“Is she like your tutor?”

“No,” Luke shook his head, shifting further into his seat, “She became one of my best friends. She’s got like photographic memory, so she is really good at helping me with staying on top of everything.”

Quinn smiled, “You’re pretty lucky to have her then.”

“Yeah, I am.”

“Q,” Jack said, catching his attention, “Y/N is cute too. She’s got that whole happy-go-lucky personality, Mom loves her too.”

“Oh really?” Quinn, raising his brows, “What, so you like her, J?”

Jack scoffed, rolling his eyes, “I wouldn’t date one of his friends, relax dude.”

The eldest brother rolled his eyes in amusement, knowing that Y/N being Luke’s friend was probably the only reason stopping Jack from shooting his shot. He turned his attention back to Luke, who was still slumping,

“How’s it like being with Mallory?” He asked, changing the subject slightly, “Mom mentioned her once or twice to me, saying something about wanting to meet her.”

“Yeah, is she coming to the lake with us?” Jack added, shifting his posture to face Luke, “I haven’t even met your girlfriend yet, why’s that?”

“I dunno,” Luke sighed, moving his hand to play with the curls at the back of his head, “She hasn’t told her parents yet about us dating and wants to wait to meet everyone until she tells them.”

“Oh,” Jack’s eyes widened, “She’s one of those girls… Didn’t you say she was pretty popular too?”

Luke shrugged, “Guess so.”

“Mhm, one of those girls,” Jack chuckled, leaning back and using one of his arms as a makeshift cushion for his head, “I wish you good luck, solider.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“I’m just saying, those girls have been trouble every time I’ve got mixed in with them,” Jack reasoned with his hands raised in surrender, “I, personally, would rather go for a girl like Y/N. She’s smart, she’s nice, friendly, sweet, and she’s pretty.”

“Sounds like you have a crush on Lukey’s best friend,” Quinn’s eyes having a glint of his teasing manner that matched his tone, “Is Y/N coming up to the lake house with us?”

“I didn’t ask her,” Luke told his brothers.

Jack pouted, “Why?”

“She’s probably headed to Toronto this summer.”

Quinn sat up, “Toronto?”

“Yeah, duel citizenship or something. Her mom is Canadian.” Luke said, like it was the most obvious answer.

“Even better, no wonder why she’s so nice! She’s Canadian!” Jack exclaimed, “What are you now going to tell me that she likes the Leafs too?”

Judging off the look Luke gave Jack, his eyes widened, “So, she’s perfect is what you’re saying!”

“Jack” Luke groaned, “Shut up dude.”

“How did you fumble that?!” Jack asked exacerbated, shaking his head as he adjusted the hat on his head, “It’s like you don’t listen to my advice when it comes to girls.”

Quinn, seeing Luke’s face, rolled his eyes, “Alright Rowdy, leave him alone.”

“She’s literally just my friend,” Luke told him, “She has boyfriend too, he’s obsessed with her.”

Jack mumbled something amongst the lines of ‘rightfully so’ under his breath. Eventually going back to his phone.

“So it’s just gonna be Caufield and Z this summer?” Quinn questioned, the middle brother nodding, “It’ll be good.”

Summer turned out great for the Hughes family lake house. The boys all enjoyed going out of the boat, wake surfing, swimming, and drinking then coming back to house in the late afternoon to shoot pool. It was their annual boys trip, taking the time to be around their friends and family while also enjoying off season. They would drive to the nearby arena to practice on days with Jimmy coaching them. Often spending the morning in the makeshift gym in their garage to get a workout in.

You on the other hand, decided to take some summer classes to get ahead on course credits — flying through the material. You also enjoyed working at the local coffee shop, gotten to meet new people and becoming friends with your regulars. Besides, it never hurt to have some extra money in your pocket. Josh came back from his month long trip, revolving around visiting his family, sometime towards the end of July. You two would hang out whenever you weren’t working. Spending time in your home, cuddling on the coach or in your bed, watching movies at the neighborhood drive in, and occasionally going up to his friends’ lake house on some weekends.

It was a productive summer overall, you couldn’t really complain. Hours on your resume plus seeing your boyfriend every day. You loved it. The only thing that was keeping getting under your skin was Josh hinting towards the two of you having yet to sleep together. You were freshly sixteen and you didn’t feel ready yet, you felt too young and you didn’t want to make a decision that you might regret.

Although you hid this from him and everyone else, deep down you wanted your first to be with someone you loved. Someone that you genuinely cared deeply about and had that connection with. It had to be with the right person. He told you he loved you, how he’ll never leave you, and that he wanted to marry you. Josh was nice, he was your boyfriend and you cared about him — but did you love him? You weren’t exactly certain about that yet. You didn’t feel the magnetic pull or the connection that you wanted for your first time. It was also too early, you’d only been together for about five months and dating for almost four of those months.

So, you kept brushing it off every time it was brought up: you had work later, you’re too tired, you didn’t feel well, your head hurt, your parents were on the way home, you’re on your period. The excuses kept coming. Even if you didn’t acknowledge it in your head, but the underlying fact was, you were not going to sleep with Josh.

“I have work tomorrow and I want to get a good night sleep.” You told your boyfriend, who was relaxed on the couch with an arm resting behind you, “I start early.”

“But baby it could help you sleep,” He replied, placing a tender kiss on your lips, “Your parents aren’t even home tonight.”

“I know but I’ve been exhausted from work.”

Josh gave you a small understanding smile, his lips forming into a straight line, “Alright babe, it’s okay.”

You kissed him again, your fingers playing with his dirty blonde hair at the nape of his neck, “Sorry baby.”

“I think I should head home then.” He sighed, standing up and stretching his shoulders, “You should get that sleep you’ve been waiting for.”

Your face faltered for a brief second, “Yeah okay, I’ll see you tomorrow then?”

Josh only shrugged, “Maybe, might go hang out with the boys.”

He left soon after, leaving you alone in your home. You sighed, heading to your bathroom to shower and start getting ready for bed. The soft scent of strawberries filled the steamy bathroom as you shampooed your hair. The hot water running over your body as you stood under the stream. Your head was hurting, full of anxious thoughts and energy from Josh’s recent behaviour. You gave him the benefit of the doubt that this was just a phase he was going through. That he would eventually drop it and the two of you could continue on without the silent tension that existed between you. You didn’t know how long you stood under the shower head, before deciding to step out. The soft material of your towel patting down your skin before you applied your vanilla body lotion everywhere.

You relaxed in your bed, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire playing on your TV screen as you scrolled through your phone. Unexpectedly, you received a call which you picked up after the first ring,

“Hello?” You asked, still confused from the caller id.

“Hey, Y/N.”

“Hi Lukey,” You said, fully aware that he could likely hear the smile through your voice, “How’s the lake house treating you?”

His voice was low and had a slight tinge to it, “Mallory and I broke up.”

You paused, “Oh my god, are you okay?”

There was some heavy breathing from his end, you knew that this must’ve just happened. You could hear some rustling, assuming that Luke was settling into his bed or the couch by the sounds of it.

“I- uh, I don’t even know.” He sighed, “She just called me and said she found someone new.” His voice breaking towards the end of his sentence before he cleared his throat.

You knew he was either on the verge of tears or was already crying, and your heart broke for the boy, “Oh, Luke…”

“Just wanted to talk to you,” Luke mumbled, “I hope I’m not keeping you or your parents awake by calling you.”

You chuckled lightly, classic Luke always so considerate, “No, not at all. I’m home alone and just watching a movie.”

“No Josh?”

“No, he left an hour or so ago.” You told him, shuffling down to lay on your back with your phone to your ear still.

Luke hummed, “How are you guys doing?”

He could hear you hesitate and how the air hitched in your throat, “G- Good. We’re fine.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, I guess so.” Trying to keep up with the somewhat lie, before deciding that it was only Luke and you could tell him the truth, “Well maybe a bit rocky right now.”

You imagine him having an expression of confusion mixed with some curiosity, “Why’s that?”

“He keeps bringing up the idea of us sleeping together,” You told him, cringing slightly at your own words, “And I keep giving him excuses to not.”

“Sleeping together? Why wouldn’t you? I guess unless your parents don’t like you two sharing a bed?”

You laugh lightly at his innocence in that moment, “No, not like that sleeping together. Like the, having sex, type of sleeping together… Sorry if that’s TMI. And he’s just kinda gets upset everytime I make up an excuse.”

“He’s trying to sleep with you?”

“He’s just been asking about it,” You shuffle deeper into your blankets, “You make it sound bad when you say it like that.”

Luke lets out a brief scoff, a combination of disbelief and a pinch of frustration, “Is it not though? He should’ve just backed off after you told him no.”

“I think it’s just because his friends have been talking about losing their virginities. Can we just talk about something else? Please?”

“Yeah okay,” Luke replied, voice bland, “Just don’t do it because you feel pressured or anything, it’s not worth it.”

You sighed, knowing your best friend was in the right, “Yeah, I know.”

Luke sank further into his own bed, staring out the window as he spoke to you over the phone. He watched how the moonlight danced over the lake and how the stars twinkled in the night sky. He could hear the distant conversations between his brothers downstairs, not paying much attention to the conversation he was missing out on. Luke felt the strange surge of emotion that bubbled in his gut when you mentioned that your boyfriend was constantly asking you about sex. He knew that you were capable of making your own decisions, but it didn’t wave the bad feeling he felt.

School started, the warm September air with its nibble of the Fall breeze in the mornings. Luke had a few classes with you, allowing you to sit with your best friend — without worrying about Josh getting upset over it. Josh was very pleased to hear that Luke would be away all summer. He wasn’t the most keen of you two hanging out, having to ask you to spend less time with Luke and more time with your boyfriend. You promising Josh that you saw Luke as only a classmate, even if that wasn’t necessarily the truth.

You found yourself at a party on a Friday night, mainly because it was Josh who was hosting it. The entire junior and senior year were invited to it. A red solo cup in your hand, cradling it close to your body. Josh stayed right next to you, his hand dipping lower than your waist to squeeze your ass every so often. He kept you no further than an arm lengths away as he talked to his teammates around the pong table. Josh was a couple drinks deep, on occasion his words would slur.

Luke walked into the space with two of his own teammates from the school hockey team. His eyes landed on you, widening at the sight of you wearing a short skirt and a pink tank top. You gave him a small smile as he looked over to you while getting himself a drink.

He looked good. He always did. He wore a flannel over his grey hoodie and a baseball cap over his head of curls. He laughed at whatever his friends said to him, making you wish you were next to Luke at this party rather than Josh.

Josh’s hand toyed with the bottom of your shirt, “Hi baby.” He said to you, his eyes scanning over your figure, “Did I tell you that you look so hot tonight.”

Your cheeks heated up, “Thank you, baby.”

His lips landed on yours, kissing you passionately and pulling your body closer to his front. You kissed him back, placing your hands on the back of his neck. His arms wrapping tightly around your middle as he groaned into the kiss.

“Wanna go somewhere more private?” He whispered into your ear before kissing your jaw, “Don’t know if I want everyone here to watch us make out.”

You giggled, moving your head to give him more access, “Okay.”

Josh pulled away, looking at you. His pupils were dilated and were a bit glassy from the alcohol coursing through his body. His words were slurring together but other than that, he didn’t seem super drunk, “Okay, I’ll go up first and you come a few minutes after?”

You nodded before kissing him quickly, he grinned at you before walking away towards his room. You headed towards the kitchen to get yourself another drink. Weaving through the few bodies to reach the vodka bottle. You poured a bit of the alcohol into your cup before adding juice to it.

“Hey,” You looked to your side to see Luke there.

“Hi Luke,” You said to him, taking a long sip of your drink. Your face cringing slightly at the strong taste of the liqueur that burned the back of your throat.

He moved closer to your side, to hear you over the loud noises, “Where did Josh go?”

You pointed upstairs before giggling, curtesy to being tipsy leaning into your drunken state, “I’m meeting him up there soon.”

“How many drinks have you had?”

“Three? This is my fourth,” You told him, slurring your words slightly, “Or maybe my fifth. I forgot.”

Luke’s face now wore a small frown, “Are you drunk?”

“Me?!” You exclaimed, your voice louder than you were expecting it to be, “No, I’m not drunk.”

“You’re slurring your words.” He stated, crossing his arms over his chest, “I don’t know if that’s a good idea, Y/N.”

You huffed, slamming your cup onto the table, “I can do what I want.”

“I didn’t say that,” Luke sighed, “I’m just saying…”

“No.” You interrupted him, putting your finger into his face, “You just want to ruin my fun because Mallory broke up with you.”

You knew that you shouldn’t have said that. The air around you two thickened as you both paused. Your head felt like it was pulsing from the warmth of alcohol in your body. You didn’t even mean to say that, the words coming out of your mouth faster than you could process them. You cursed yourself mentally for saying something like that to Luke, who was only just standing next to you. You saw his face falter at you, an expression of hurt washing over his features for a brief moment before his masked it.

“Alright,” He mumbled, stepping away from you.

“I should go.” You sighed, moving past him. His hand wrapped around your wrist. Your skin tingled at his touch and a shiver ran down your spine. You glanced down at his hand holding you and back up to his face.

His eyes softened when your eyes connected, “Don’t have sex with him while you’re drunk.”

“Luke,”

“Promise me that you won’t.” He said gently, don’t daring to break the eye contact. You stared into his eyes, seeing the silent pleading behind them,

“Okay.”

Luke’s eyes darted over your face before he released your wrist from his hold. He watched as you made your way towards the staircase, seeing you glance over to him one last time before disappearing to the second floor of the house. He looked at his barely touched can, deciding to throw it out. He wasn’t in the mood anymore. Luke rejoined his friends, hoping to take his mind off the fact that his drunk best friend was upstairs in a room with her boyfriend — the boyfriend that kept giving him a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach.

“Hey dude, you good?” Dylan asked the boy, giving him a gentle nudge. Luke snapped out of his daze,

“Yeah man, I’m good.” Luke nodded, giving Dylan a tight lipped smile, “Probably gonna head out in a bit, practice in the morning.”

Luke felt conflicted, he wasn’t sure if he wanted to leave or stay at the party. Part of him didn’t want to stick around, knowing you were upstairs with Josh but the other part of him wanted to stay because you were upstairs with Josh. What if you needed him and he wasn’t there?

He eventually decided on leaving, Jack coming to pick him up, “How was it?”

Luke shrugged, closing the car door and tilting his back against the headrest, “Can we just go home?”

“That bad?” Jack laughed, “I thought you said Y/N was gonna be here?”

“She was.” Luke mumbled while Jack started to drive, “She left with her boyfriend.”

Jack glanced over to his brother, giving him a knowing look. He expected that Luke had feelings for his best friend, it was hard not to like the girl. She was sweet, easygoing, and she was cute. With Luke freshly out of a relationship, Jack expected him to be a lot more down but it seemed as though having Y/N around kept Luke occupied. Jack opted to not say anything more to his younger brother.

Luke kept his distance from you a few days following the party, he wasn’t sure when and why his emotions towards you changed. He avoided your eye contact in class, answering your questions with short and bland sentences, and immediately leaving once the lesson ended. You sighed, closing your notebook as Luke had once again scrambled out of the classroom. You put your things into your bag before slinging a strap over your shoulders.

When you left the room, you spotted Josh leaning against the nearby lockers. You sharply inhaled at the sight of him, mentally groaning of his presence. It’s not that you were upset that he was waiting for you, per se… It just felt like as of recently, the two of you weren’t on the same page anymore. He was insistent on losing his virginity to you, talking about another one of his teammates losing theirs, and how he loved you so much and is wanting to take the next step with you. You on the other hand, would just brush off his words — you didn’t want this. He didn’t seem to understand either, which was the worst part. You often got to take your mind off of your crumbling relationship by hanging out with Luke during classes, but with him ignoring you lately, you didn’t get that either.

“Hi baby,” Josh grinned, immediately slithering an arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest and attempted to kiss you.

“Josh, I told you not at school.” You scolded him, pushing him away, “You can do that after school, just not here.”

He groaned, rolling his eyes, “Oh come on, everyone already knows we’re together.”

“I don’t care,” You scoffed, already walking towards your next class, “I don’t like PDA and not everyone wants to see us making out in the hallways.”

Josh was right behind you, “Who cares what people think? I think it’s hot as fuck.” He smirked, his hands once again on your hips.

“Josh, please.” You sighed, brushing his hands off of you. He looked at you, almost with a smidge of disgust or maybe disappointment. You avoid his eye, looking anywhere but at him.

“Fine, have a good class.”

You let out a breath of relief as he turned around sharply, disappearing into the crowd of teenagers in the school hallways. You tightened your grip on your backpack strap, and tilting your head against the wall.

“You okay?” Glancing back towards the voice, you see Luke’s friend Dylan standing in front of you with concern over his features. You slowly nod,

“Yeah, I’m fine.” You told him, hoping that he’ll drop it. Dylan was nice, typical hockey player guy, but he had good intentions. Besides, he knew you were Luke’s best friend so nothing he did was with malicious intent.

“Okay…” Dylan said, still somewhat suspicious, “I’m here if you wanna talk though, Lukey too.”

“Thanks,” You replied, giving a tight smile, “How’s your hockey season going?”

He beamed at the mention of his sport, going onto talking your ear off about the most recent game as the two of you walked into your next class. You tried your best to keep up, but it was hard when you were thinking about Josh. You weren’t sure if you still wanted to be with him, you didn’t think relationships were supposed to be like this. Granted, this was your first 'official' relationship. You've had crushes in the past, been in a few talking stages, but at the end of the day — you were too much of a sweetheart and no guy wanted to be the one to break a sweet girl's heart. You and Dylan eventually make it to your biology class, sitting towards the back of the class waiting for the lesson to start. Luke walked in, right before the bell, plopping into the empty seat next to you. He gave Dylan a single nod before glancing at you,

"Hi Luke." You greeted, a warm smile on your face.

"Hey." He replied, rather plainly before shuffling through his bag for his notes. You wondered if something had happened at the party that caused him to act like this, the fact that you also didn't remember much of the party wasn't much help either. Waking up the next day with a raging migraine was a strong indicator of the amount of alcohol you consumed.

He continued to keep to himself, keeping himself occupied with the starting hockey season. The pressure was on with Jack officially playing for the Devils, and knowing that there were scouts from various colleges that were watching him play. Luke dived deep into his training, ensuring that he was eating and sleeping properly, and always coming early and staying later at practices. Quinn had teased Luke about his recent dedication to hockey as a response to being broken up with, calling it forbidden motivation. Luke only brushing off his brother's comments.

Luke wouldn't lie if he was asked whether he missed Y/N, of course he did. He was a smart person though, he knew he would only cause issues between you and your... boyfriend, if he continued to stick around. Plus you seemed happy, including how you was acting around him at that party.

But Luke didn't know about your second thoughts on your relationship with Josh, Luke didn't know that you weren't exactly happy with the lacrosse player.

"Luke!" You called out after him, seeing him a few feet ahead of you on the side walk. He paused in his steps, looking over his shoulder to see you jogging behind him,

"Oh hi, Y/N."

The two of you fell into a comfortable pace as you walked home from school, "Have you been avoiding me?"

"What?"

You chuckled, putting your AirPods back into their case, "I mean it feels like you're ignoring me, you barely even talk to me in class anymore."

He let out a sheepish laugh, running his fingers through his curls, "I've just been busy with hockey."

"Oh okay... So it wasn't because of what I did at that party a month ago?"

"No, I don't care about that. I know you didn't mean that and I don't care if you slept with him. It's not my business." Luke shrugged, still not looking at you even though you kept your focus on him.

"I didn't sleep with him." You told him, "I haven't yet."

"Good for you?"

"Luke..." You sighed, tugging at the sleeve of his sweatshirt, "C'mon, what's bothering you?"

"Nothing, I swear." He huffed, placing his hat back on his head, "Sorry, I have to go. I have practice."

You watched as he turned at the streetlight, making his way back to his house. You frowned at your interaction with him, still unsure of what was causing the distance between you and Luke.

It was now the weekend before Christmas break and you were yet again at another party. One of Josh's teammates was hosting it and it was packed in the small house. You came a bit later than most of the crowd, given that you had an afternoon shift at your job. You walked in, wearing a tight long sleeve with baggy jeans. Josh was nowhere to be found, so you decided to get yourself a drink.

You grabbed a cooler and poured yourself a double shot, you had to catch up to everyone else — who were all clearly intoxicated. You brought the shot glass to your lips, cringing at the strong taste of vodka running down your throat.

"Hey," Luke said to you, grabbing a beer for himself, "I didn't think I would see you here."

"Hi Luke," You give the boy a smile, "I didn't think that you would be here, given your hockey schedule."

He chuckled, "Yeah, practice was cancelled for tomorrow morning so Dylan asked me to show up."

"How have you been? Are Jack and Quinn coming back for Christmas?" You asked him while sipping from your cooler.

"Yeah, Quinn came back last night, Jack is in Jersey until Christmas. He has a Christmas game." He explained, "I've been alright though, sorry again for ignoring you, I was just going through some stuff."

"It's okay, I get it." You replied, a part of you sad that he was going through stuff and wasn't able to talk to you about it, "I'm here for you if you ever want to talk."

"Thanks. When do you leave for Toronto?" Luke bumping his shoulder against yours. You giggle, already feeling the effects from the two shots kicking in,

"The 26th."

"Y/N!" You and Luke's head snap to the shouting of your boyfriend’s voice, to see Josh leaning against the doorway. You could tell by the way he was standing and the look on his face that he was drunk, "What are you doing?"

You feel your shoulders drop, "Sorry, I was just getting a drink and catching up with Luke."

"Come on baby, let's go upstairs." He slurred, grabbing your arm rather harshly and pulling you behind him. You winced at the aggression, bowing your head as you followed him. You looked past your shoulder to see that Luke had pushed himself off of his leaning position against the counter, as Josh dragged you away.

"Not while you're drunk." He told you, though it was mainly you reading his lips due to the loud music. You nodded, "I know."

Luke couldn't shake the weird feeling building in his gut as he watched you get pulled away from your boyfriend. It was chewing him apart as he stood in his spot, contemplating of his next moves. He hesitated for a moment before he decided to go after you. Luke didn’t like how Josh had grabbed you and knowing that you were intoxicated.

“Hughes, where are you going?” Dylan called out after Luke, “Dude!”

Dylan, more inclined to get Luke towards the pong table followed after the taller boy. Luke’s feet led his way as he was still trapped in his own head, his feet carrying him up the steps when his blood went cold. He could hear your voice, your scared voice behind the door.

“J- Josh! Stop!” He heard you cry, “Get off!”

“Is that?” Dylan paused, glancing over at his friend.

Luke’s facial expression hardened before he used his shoulder to forcefully open the closed door, “What the hell is going on here?” He demanded, not thinking twice of his actions before approaching Josh and pulling him off of you.

“What the fuck man?!” Josh snapped, venom in his voice as he glared at the hockey player, “This isn’t a fucking gang bang!”

In front of him, there was you. You never looked so terrified in your life. Your hands were clutching onto your shirt, trembling. Your eyes were brimmed with tears.

“Get the hell away from her.” Luke told Josh, stepping towards him. Luke had a few inches over the lacrosse player, “Dylan, take Y/N.”

Dylan immediately darted towards you, his arms protecting you, “You’re okay, you’re safe. We got you.” He whispered into your ear as he pulled you away from the bed and into the hall. You were violently shaking in his arms while he guided you outside the house.

He continued his attempts to calm you down, though appreciated, you wanted your best friend.

You don’t know how long you and Dylan were outside, he had guided you towards a more quiet area near his car. Your heart was pounding in your ears, your chest felt hot with the adrenaline and alcohol circling in your system. You kept running your hands over each other, attempting to crack your fingers to sooth the anxiety surging in your veins.

Luke eventually walked outside, clearly still heated from the way his legs carried his body. He was glancing at his knuckles, stretching out his fingers and shaking out his hand. His eyes landed on you and his pace immediately picked up to a jog,

“Oh, Y/N…” He breathed out, opening his arms out for you.

You met him halfway, colliding your body into his — allowing for his strong arms to wrap around you like a shield. His scent, the woodsy musk with a tinge of mint, embedded in his clothes comforting you like a warm blanket. You could feel him place a kiss on the top of your hair when you choked on a few sobs,

“I got you.” He reassured, holding onto your smaller frame, “He’s never going to touch you or ever come near you again.”

“L- Luke,” You whimpered, peering up from his chest to look at him. His entire face softened at your tear stained cheeks, his thumb carefully brushing away your tears.

“I’m right here, sweet girl.” He told you, “I’m right here.”

Dylan had gotten into the car that he and Luke drove in to the party, Dylan also being the designated driver for the night. Luke held you in his arms until you seemed to calm down slightly, no longer crying nor shaking. He carefully helped you into the backseats, without a doubt sliding into the seat next to you.

The drive was silent, the occasional sniffle from you while you rested your head on Luke’s shoulder. He kept an arm around you the entire drive,

“Is your home okay?” He asked you, his tone gentle as ever while brushing your hair out of your face and tucking it behind your ear.

“I don’t want to be alone.” You choked out. Luke immediately nodded, “It’s okay, you can stay at mine if that’s okay with you.”

You gave him a small smile.

Dylan dropped the two of you at Luke’s house, “Let me know if either of you need anything.” Dylan said to Luke as you two climbed out of the car, “I mean it.”

“Yeah, I know,” Luke replied, draping his flannel over your shoulders, “Thanks man.”

“No need to thank me.”

You mumbled out a quiet ‘thank you’ to Dylan before Luke led you to his home. He retrieve a few bottles of water from the kitchen before the two of you made his way to his room. You sat on his bed, focused on your lap while he pulled out a shirt and spare boxers for you.

“Do you want a hoodie?” He asked you, looking over at your saddened position. Luke knelt down to your level, taking your hands into his, “It’s over now. I promise I won’t let him ever come near you.”

“Luke,” You breathed out, noticing his already bruising hand, “Your knuckles…”

His gaze dropped from you to his hand, the dried blood over the swelling skin, “It’s not my blood, don’t worry.”

You eventually made your way to his bathroom, where he left the clothes and a clean towel on the counter. The hot water from the shower head ran over your cold skin, the feeling of his hands ghosting over your body. You tried scrubbing away the feeling again and again and again with Luke’s body wash; tears threatening to fall yet again as the skin turned red from irritation.

His clothes were warm when you slipped them on. They smelt so distinctly like Luke. You made your way back to his room where he was lounging on his bed with his pajamas on. His eyes glancing at the redness of your arms from the excessive force you used whilst washing yourself.

“Come,” He invited you, patting on the empty space of the bed. You crawled up to him, curling into a small ball before he handed you his favourite UMich hoodie, “Here’s a hoodie for you.”

You gave him a little smile while you pulled it on. The edges of the sleeves were thinning from the amount of wear and the drawstrings were tied into a small ball. It was well worn and a few sizes too big but it was perfect.

“Are you feeling a bit better? No, sorry that was a stupid fucking question,” Luke quickly apologized, his hand already going to play with your hair in a comforting manner, “Did the shower help at least?”

You hummed out a response, inching closer to him on the bed. He had your favourite Disney movie already on his TV, quietly playing. Luke adjusted the comforter over the two of you, allowing you to relax further into the bed as the two of you watched the film in a peaceful silence.

Your eyes got heavier and it was harder to keep them open as the exhaustion from the night was getting to you. Luke seemed to notice, “Let me know when you wanna sleep, I’ll head to Jack’s room or something.”

You poked your head up from the makeshift pillow of his chest at his sentence, “Can you stay?”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.” You confirmed, watching a content expression wash over his face, “Plus, you’re comfy and warm.”

“I’m glad that I’m at least good for one thing.” He chuckled, snuggling his head into his pillow once he knew that he didn’t have to move for the night.

You sighed, content for the first time since leaving the party. You knew you were perfectly safe when you were with Luke. You allowed your eyes to close, your breathing slowing to a relaxed and calm pace. His arm still around you while you used him as your pillow, tucking your body into his side.

Luke replayed what he saw from that room, from how scared you looked to when he shoved Josh against the wall before finally punching him in the face repeatedly. It was completely out of character for Luke to pick a fight, a physical fist fight. But he would do it for you, any day. Josh had no right to be that close to you, to scare you to the verge of tears. Luke felt himself slowly get more upset the more he thought about the situation, but he felt you shift against him. He looked down to see you, cuddled up against his body.

He smiled as he looked down at your figure, carefully using the remote to turn off his TV and grateful for having longer limbs to reach over to shut off his lamp. The room fell into darkness as he settled for sleep.

“Thank you Lukey,” You mumbled against the material of his shirt, “For everything.”

His heart swelled.

“I’ll always be there for you.” Luke whispered into your hair, planting a soft kiss against your forehead, “No matter what.”

And he was. He stayed glued to your side, whether it be physically or theoretically — due to the both of you separating for winter break. Luke texted you constantly, occasionally calling you in the evenings. When school started again in January, he didn’t leave your side. He waited for you at the street intersection every morning, so the two of you could walk the rest of the distance together. Josh only attempted to talk to you twice, which Luke and Dylan were immediately able to shut him down. Not even giving the lacrosse player a chance to even look at you. Luke would hang around you between classes and during lunch, slowly but surely falling back into your old routine.

Lunches spent in vacant classrooms to complete homework assignments together, going over to his house after school until he had to leave for practice. In which he would always drop you off at home, since he didn’t feel comfortable with you walking back. Sometimes you would go to his practices to do your homework in the stands, or just to simply watch him play the game he loved so much.

You were healing.

Luke was helping you heal.

He kept you company by staying on FaceTime on the nights that were harder for you. You two wouldn’t even be talking, just having each other propped up on the screen as you did different things. On some nights, he would drive to your house to pick you up — the two of you going on long drives with no destination in mind. Aimlessly driving down different roads, making turns here and there. His country playlist that you’ve grown to love so much would be humming in the background as the two of you would park in the middle of nowhere to talk. Even though you two were conjoined at the hip everyday, you both had endless things to talk about. It was so easy, it came so easy.

He would show up to your house every Saturday night with his Nike backpack filled with snacks for your movie nights. You two would lay on your bed comfortably, with a random movie or hockey game on the TV. Luke would have a lazy arm around your shoulders as you lean into his side, both of you cracking small jokes or commentating whatever was playing.

Sunday afternoons were reserved for finishing any leftover homework or class notes in the Hughes kitchen. The two of you would sit at the dinner table, writing away in your notebooks. Ellen would bring you two water or snacks on occasion, and remind you two to take breaks. During those breaks, Luke would often drag you to basement to try to teach you hockey. You weren’t great but it was fun to try, and it was better since you could physically see how much fun it was for him. He would wear a constant bright smile and laugh at your attempts to shoot a goal.

Luke Hughes was easily your favourite person, he was your favourite player on the ice. You wouldn’t miss a single game. You would sit next to Ellen and Jim in the stands, an old blanket draped across you and Ellen’s laps. He would wave at you from the ice each time he skated by.

Junior year had its highs and lows but it was by far your favourite so far. There was an end of year party that was coming up and Dylan had been begging you and Luke to go with him.

“Please! Everyone is going, we should definitely go.” Dylan explained to the two of you, “It’s the last one of junior year.”

“I don’t know,” Luke sighed, leaning back in his chair and placing his pencil down, “These parties are always so ass.”

You laughed at Luke’s comment, “I mean, if you really want us to be there Dyl, then I’m sure we can go.” You glanced over at the curly headed boy, his eyebrow raised slightly.

“See! Y/N knows what fun is!” Dylan exclaimed, “Come on Hughesy, worse case if you leave early.”

“Fine.” Luke huffed, straightening his posture, “We’ll go but I’m not drinking.”

“All good with me!” Dylan chuckled, “More for me.”

You, Dylan, and Luke all entered the house together, weaving through the bodies in the hallway to reach the main area of the house. Dylan had immediately gone towards the fridge to get a drink. You survey the crowd, trying to pin point people that you know. Luke stayed next to you, with a light hand on your lower back as the two of you weaved through the drunk teenagers.

You greeted a few people that you knew as you passed by, them being a bit too intoxicated to say anything more than a "hey!". There were people dancing in the middle of the living room, the neon colours from the LED lights flashing, and the music from the speakers pounding your eardrums.

"Did you want something to drink?" He asked into your ear, his posture slouched to near your height. You shrugged, "I'll start drinking in a bit."

You pulled Luke towards a more empty area, where the two of you could stand whilst leaning against the wall. Dylan had eventually found you both, him handing you a Twisted Tea which you thanked him for before cracking the tab open.

"I want to dance." You told the boys, "And I will need another drink."

"Sure, go have fun!" Dylan exclaimed, "We'll keep an eye on you if you want."

"Don't you want to dance too?" You questioned, finishing the rest of your drink.

Luke raised an eyebrow, "Since when have we ever danced at a party?"

You giggled, slowly pulling away from the two, "You can always join me!" You sang out.

"Have fun Y/N!"

You rolled your eyes in a playful manner as you spun on your heels to grab another cooler. There were a few girls from your English class that you chatted with while finishing your second drink, which the four of you had agreed to take a celebratory shot of tequila for finishing the semester — before you all made your way towards the group of dancing teens. The alcohol was flowing through your body, allowing you to feel the rhythm of the music and move your hips along to it.

"You are the coolest and nicest girl in our year, Y/N!" One girl, Abby, exclaimed with her voice loud to over come the volume of the music, "Like, seriously girl! You're so smart and you're so fun!"

"No literally!" Sarah laughed, placing a hand on your arm, "Like you're so popular but so humble about it! You literally have every boy on their knees for you. Josh completely fumbled with you!"

You let out a small chuckle, attempting to ignore your ex-boyfriend's mention, "I'm not popular, I just try to be nice to everyone!"

You weren't sure how much time had passed nor the number of drinks you've had since you had originally arrived at the party, but between the drinking, socializing, and dancing — you were feeling the exhaustion creeping up on you. You bid the girls a quick goodbye before excusing yourself, pulling away from the crowd. You searched the room for the tall curly headed boy, sighing happily once seeing him against the door frame with an easy smile drawn on his features.

When his eyes landed on you approaching him, his entire face lit up as he tightened the lid of the plastic water bottle. Luke's eyes darted from one of his friends and back towards you. He lifted his arm up, allowing you to tuck yourself into his side. Your smaller figure fit perfectly under his arm, you leaned your head against his chest as he continued chatting with Dylan and their other friends.

"Hey Lukey," You said to the boy, tilting your head upwards to making eye contact with him.

"Hey you," Luke chuckled, brushing a lone strand of hair out of your face, "Did you have fun, drunkie?"

"I'm not drunk." You mumbled into his sweater, "Just had a few drinks."

He hummed, "Yeah, I saw you hammer out those three cans of Mikes and down a few shots with the girls — definitely not drunk." Luke teased, "You okay?"

"Yeah, just getting sleepy."

"Hey Dyl, we're heading out now. You need a ride?" Luke asked Dylan, who was still engaged in conversation. Dylan waved him off, saying something about either finding a ride or taking an uber home later.

Luke kept his arm wrapped around your shoulders as he guided you out of the house party and towards his car that was parked a little ways away from the party.

"You looked like you enjoyed the party." He told you, supporting your body while you stumbled in your steps.

"Yes! I saw so many people we knew!" You giggled, leaning further into Luke's body.

Luke chuckled, pulling your body to keep you upwards, "You gotta keep standing upright to walk, sweet girl. Keep leaning into me and you're going to be sideways."

"What's the matter with that?"

"We gotta make it to the car." He said back, "We're almost there."

You let out a dramatic sigh, "Can't you carry me? You're strong from hockey and I'm tired."

"The car is right there." Luke laughed, pointing at his car ahead of you.

"Why are you laughing at me?" You whined.

He rolled his eyes at your drunken state, "Not laughing at you, I promise. Come on."

Luke opened the passage side door for you, you climbed into the seat with both of your legs hanging out of the vehicle. He carefully readjusted your body to slide your legs into the car. His hands brushing over your front as he fastened your seatbelt, "You comfy?" He teased as you rested your head on your hand that was propped up on the centre console.

"Mhm, I like this car." You yawned.

Luke placed a light kiss on the top of your hair, "Alright, let's get you home."

He closed your door and slide into the driver's seat, "You wanted something to eat?" Luke asked you as he pulled away from the curb.

"Oo! Can we get McDonald's? I want nuggets so bad!" You exclaimed, immediately sitting up in your seat.

He laughed, lightly pushing you back into your seat, "Okay, we can get food and then I'll drop you off."

Luke pulled into the drive through at the 24-hour McDonald's, ordering your go to along with a Dr. Pepper for himself. He paid for your food, handing you the brown paper bag. He parked his car in the empty lot to let you eat.

You excitedly opened up your box of nuggets along with the sauce, you nearly letting out a moan of satisfaction when taking your first bite, "You're the best, Lukey."

"Oh yeah?" He said while taking a sip of his drink, "You're saying that because I bought you food."

"No, that's not true! You buy me food, you bring snacks when we study, and you drive me to your hockey games. You've always been the best and no one comes even close to beating you," You explained, still feeling the effects of the alcohol as words left your mouth faster than you could process them, "Like, seeing you and hanging out with you and talking to you is the best part of my day. I could be having an absolutely shitty day but the second I see you and your smile and your perfect curls, suddenly my day is not so shitty and is good again."

Luke's eyes widen slightly as you spoke, his body comfortably lounging in his seat as he listened. His drink untouched in his hands. He watched you as your eyes sparkled while you talked, even between bites of your food.

"And you always watch out for me and you listen to me, like actually listen to me. I know a lot of people but no one sees me the way that you do, no one knows me the way that you do. It's like, whenever I'm with you, I just know that everything is going to be okay because I have you. You're everything I want in a person." You told him, your cheeks flushing a shade of red. Your hands instinctively covering your face in slight embarrassment as you sobered up slightly from the food entering your body. The realization of everything that you 'casually' told Luke, who sat in front of you, crashing over you.

"Oh my god," You whisper to yourself, "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to make this weird or anything. I shouldn't have said anything."

"Why are you sorry?" Luke asked, carefully putting his drink into the cup holder. His eyes were still on you, his hands gently moving yours away from your face. His facial features softened even more as he took in your shy expression and rosy pink brushed across your cheeks.

His larger and calloused hands held yours, "You shouldn't be sorry because I feel the exact same way, and I have for a while."

"Really?" You asked, your voice small and infused with the same nervous feeling that was engulfing you.

He smiled, "Really. I think there was always something about you since we first became friends that I was always drawn towards. I thought I could move away from it since I didn't want to ruin our friendship... But when you started dating J- you know who, I got jealous because I wanted to be in his spot."

His thumb brushed over the skin of your hand drawing faint circles, "I think it has always been you. You make me a better person and you always bring out the best of me."

"You're going to make me cry," You pout, the surge of happiness and loving emotions filling your chest as tears brimmed your eyes.

"I mean everything I said," Luke reassured, placing a kiss on your knuckles, "And I don't know what is going to happen next between us but I'll be okay with whatever you want."

"I think I want you to kiss me right now." You replied.

His face flushed as a small smirk drew upon his lips, "Yeah?"

You nodded. One of his hands brushed over your cheek, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear and bringing your face closer to his. Your chest leaning over the centre console to be closer to Luke, the close proximity of you two allowed you to breathe in his scent that was so distinguishably his. You could see every freckle that was sprinkled across his nose and the flecks of green in his blue eyes. His pupils were dilated as he gazed at your big doe-like eyes and flickered towards your lip-gloss coated lips.

His thumb caressed your chin — tilting your face upwards. Your eyes fluttered closed as his lips met yours, fitting perfectly with each other. You let out a happy sigh as you bring your hand to tangle with the curls at the back of his head whilst his hands cup your face. His tongue brushed lightly over your bottom lip, asking for entrance into your mouth. Your lips part open, allowing for his tongue to dance with yours.

His hands traveled down to your waist, "Come here, gorgeous girl." Luke mumbled against your lips, guiding you to climb over the console and onto his lap. His hand reached down the side of the seat to push his seat backwards to give the two of you more space. His hands trailed down to give your ass a gentle squeeze, causing a small moan to leave your lips which Luke swallowed up with his mouth.

You kept a hand in his hair, loving the feeling of his curls while the other hand rested on his upper chest. Luke had his hands on your waist, keeping you in place on his lap as your lips moved together. You pulled away for a second to catch a breath, your eyes opening to see his slightly swollen lips and blown out eyes. A giggle slipped out of both of you as you leaned down to rest your forehead against his.

"You're perfect." He breathed out, planting a kiss on your cheek.

"What does this make us Luke?" You asked him, "I don't know if I can go back to being just friends after a make out session that good."

"I would ask you to be my girlfriend right now, but I refuse to you in the middle of a McDonald's parking lot at one in the morning."

"Tomorrow then?" You laughed, pecking his lips.

"Mhm," He hummed, connecting your lips again for a brief moment, "Do you want to spend the night at mine or do you want me to drop you off at home?"

"That's a stupid question and you know that," You teased, feeling his smile against your lips, "Yours tonight."

"Alright, let's get going then," Luke chuckled, "Get back into your seat, I promise cuddling in my bed is much comfier than the driver's seat of my car."

You giggled, climbing off his lap and sliding back into your original seat. His eyes stay on your smiling self, his eyes full of adoration and love as he started his vehicle. While he drove, the two of you fell into an easy conversation as usual. Mainly debriefing the party that felt like hours ago and the drama that you had found out about from the girls you were with.

When he parked, he rushed over to your side of the car to open your door. His hand holding yours as he guided you through his house and to his room. Luke gave you a change of clothes and let you get ready for the night in the bathroom.

You climbed into his bed where he flipped open the comforter to allow you to snuggle up to him. You laid your head on his chest, feeling the strong muscles of his pectorals from working out and playing hockey over the years. His legs tangled with yours and his arms wrapped around your middle.

"My mom is going to be the most excited about this when we tell her." Luke said to you, his voice low and quiet. His hands lazily brushing through your hair, "Or Jack, he's been on my ass since the start... Although for a while, I thought he had a thing for you."

"Really?" You asked, tiredness seeping through your words as the rise and fall of Luke's chest brought you closer to sleep.

"Yeah, always told me how sweet and cute you are." Luke chuckled.

"Jack said that?"

His hand paused in its movements, "That's my brother, relax."

"I'm just teasing," You giggled, "As long as you think the same thing."

"Of course I do." He mumbled, "Good night, my gorgeous girl."

"Good night, Lukey."