#i’m also here for fox/maul

[rooksunday]

in the halcyon days (about ten of them) between geonosis and being condemned to coruscant, fox goes on a mission that—thanks to an unlikely series of events involving a space narwhal, two shinies with a metallurgy obsession, and the inadvisable phrase “i’m sure it’ll work out fine”—diverts their squad to renowned dump of the galaxy, lotho minor.

maybe fox helps out a weird kid with a generous helping of legs and talks him around from licking batteries. maybe that happens. i don’t know. you didn’t see shit.

anyway then fox is on coruscant and everything is how it is. how it is is shitty but what, fox is gonna complain to a union? sure. he’ll get right on that.

before long, there’s an attack on the senate by some spiky red kid and fox ends up space spider-man-ing him in the middle of a chase across coruscant’s mids.

kid gets away. of course he does.

… then he lurks his way back through the warren, about as subtle as a scream, and fox makes himself a cup of caf (the first one held between those tattooed hands) and thinks, hell. we’re all red here.

[tarre-was-right]

ROUND ONE: MATCH-UP EIGHT

Remember, this is NOT about who would win in a fight. This is about who makes the best leader for Mandalore as a whole.

Explanation post

Seeding

Propaganda below the cut! You can submit more on this post and I will reblog it back to here!

ALPHA-17

@ihuntmonsters: He’s uhhh super badass and sexy and kicks ass and is really awesome and I’m in love with him Perfect propaganda yes. He shall lead Mandalore

Anon: He's pretty good with training children! He is very good at inspiring loyalty! He is very willing to go after sith lords with just his teeth if he has to!

Anon: Vote for Alpha he’s got Cody’s thighs, Fox’s tits and Wolffe’s ass. He’s also a DILF, if you consider the shebse squad/command batch headcanons. And who wouldn’t want a Mand'alor like that?

Anon: Alpha-17 would be a great mandolorian leader I mean look at those Pecs! What else do u need in a leader?

Anon: HERES WHY ALPHA-17 FOR THE WIN: HE WILL ASSASSINATE ALL OF THE OTHER POLITICAL FIGURES WHICH MEANS DEAD SKEVY SHEEVY PALPATINE AND WHO DOESNT WANT THAT?

Anon: What a guy. I love him so much. He's such an asshole. Alpha-17 was part of the second test batch of clones of Jango Fett, one of a group of 100, and as such he was trained directly by Jango Fett in the art of war; these early batches who had more contact with their Mandalorian trainers are commonly considered to have a stronger claim to 'Mandalorian-ness' because of this exposure and learning experience than clones from the later, larger batches

Anon: Propaganda for Alpha 17: tall

Anon: Alpha-17 should rule Mandalore because a good king doesn’t want the power of the throne and he does not want that at all. also he’s the funniest choice. might have the skills to not get killed by maul

JANGO FETT

Anon: Jango became Mand'alor (according to Legends) at the tender age of 15 immediately after the death of his adopted father Jaster Mereel. While another of Mereel's men (Montross) made a grab for the position Jango brought up the betrayal Montross had done to Mereel causing the older man's death. The other Haat Mando'ade fell in behind Jango as he had become Jaster's Legacy. He led the Haat Mando'ade for 8 years and seemed prosperous. - And then Galidraan happened, between poisoned information and tensions being high between the Jedi and Mandalorians it only took a spark for it all to be blown to hell.

Anon: Jango was trained to be Jaster's successor to the title of Mand'alor from the time he was adopted at about 8 years of age, following the death of his blood family - when Jaster was killed, Jango was chosen by their people to step into the role despite being a young teenager at the time, suggesting that he was already known to be a good leader, and one who had earned their loyalty and trust over even Jaster's formerly-trusted second-in-command - while his time in the position was short, he did seem to command great loyalty and respect from his followers, although his focus seemed to have been more on their faction's mercenary work than on serving as a ruler or even cultural figurehead for the people of Mandalore at large - regardless, Tor Vizsla saw him as enough of a threat to his own claim to the throne to seek his swift removal from the political field - even after having disappeared from the field of politics for years following the incident at Galidraan, many Mandalorians still answered his call to come and serve as trainers for the GAR, suggesting that they took his claim seriously as well

Anon: Jango Fett, while a man of many mistakes, inherited the role of Mando'alor from Jaster and tried to do the same as he did: honour their past, move forward and provide for their people - He took care of Montross and tried his best to protect the people who followed him, to make sure they had a future and didn't fall apart and get scattered to the winds again.

@lightsaberwieldingdalek: I mean. Jango’s got the best brand recognition? Absolutely everyone for centuries with recognise the Jango Fett look, and that army that Jango was kinda sort of responsible for did conquer at least half the galaxy, just…. Not in the name of mandalore

[kimageddon]

This is an archive of my one shots, prompt challenges and requests. If you are looking for my two main series, A Prince of Dathomir or Sins of the Father, please check out my pinned post or my AO3 account.

Fanfiction for characters in the Star Wars Universe

Tech

Reader Edition - The Wedding | The Reception | The Honeymoon

OC edition - The Wedding | The Reception | The Honeymoon

Crosshair

Shoot Me Down

Couldn't Resist (NSFW)

Boba Fett

Impatient (NSFW)

The Witch's Familiar (possible series, Fantasy AU)

Masterlist - Coming Soon

Introductory Blurb

Comedic Series for the Star Wars characters and Universe - a cantina where all characters coalesce OOC, no timeline specifics

The Pants Challenge

Drinks

Prompt List - | - NSFW Prompt List - | - Who I write for

Ideas sent in via asks from the prompt list (CLOSED)

Clone Trooper Jesse

29: "I'm going to give you five seconds to take that back"

Cad Bane

34. “That’s it! I’m killing them all.” / “Wait, but what about the plan?” / “Forget the plan! These idiots keep getting on my nerves. They have no one to blame but themselves.”

31. "Good, I meant it to hurt."

ARC Trooper Fives

8. “I think I have found the cure for happiness.” / “What’s that?” / “Falling in love.”

Commander Wolffe

4. “But you…. You went drink for drink with Wolffe. How are you not hungover?” & 20. “You're so tiny compared to me.”

9. "“Have you lost your damn mind?!” / “Yes, but in all fairness, I was left alone.”

Clone Medic Kix

16. “You can’t die. Please don’t die.”

Clone Trooper Hardcase

1. "That was my favourite blaster.”

Commando Captain Gregor

23. “Don’t cry. We’ll find each other again.”

Sergeant Hunter

46. "Kiss me like you mean it."

Coruscant Guard Commander Fox

12. “Aaand just like that I have lost all the fucks I had to give.”

Lord Savage Opress

7. “I love you! No time to explain – gotta go.” / “Wait… WHAT?!” & 40. “I want to take you to all the beautiful places, sunsets over oceans and listen to the rain. I want to dance with you, make you smile and laugh… but– I also want to kiss you so hard it leaves marks on your body, I want to watch you writhe beneath me and scream my name until you can’t say anything else.”

Requests from DMs of Ko-Fi

Maul and Savage - They discuss the dichotomy of siblings

Comfort with Darth Maul - Maul x Reader

Captain Rex - On shoreleave he decides to visit the barbers

If you wish to be tagged in my fic posts or my art posts, join my tag list here.

[ninjababypowpow]

Hi there !

So. You said something about A DETROIT BECOME HUMAN AU ???? AND A SPIES AGENCY AU ?????

Tell me everything you want to share please please please !!

I'll buy you in cookies in exchange 🥺🥺

*cracks knuckles* BUCKLE IN CHUCKLELOVE

The Detroit Become Human AU (Words in the Heart, bc I am pterry trash) borrows liberally from the gameand also a bit from a tv show called Almost Human, which is VERY GOOD and it has Karl Urban in it. Basicallly Bacara is Hank, more or less, without the sad backstory, he's just a grump who doesn't like androids. Obviously, he gets assigned a new partner, who is an android. Prototype Model CC-1010, who is at the same time exactly and not at all like Bacara expected. TOGETHER THEY FIGHT CRIME They eventually stumble upon a string of murders done by androids who then...basically committed brain suicide? They deleted their own memory core and programming. (During this they meet a host of supporting characters, like Android Rights Activist Maul Opress and his brothers, who specializes in being an asshole to humans and nice to androids and who may or may not run a scheme to smuggle androids out of the country to more openminded ones, rookie!Cop Rex who once almost puked on a corpse and is forever on Bacara's shitlist for that, pleasure bot Cody who may or may not be leader of an extremely subtle revolution and many more! For you, a snippet!

The drive to the scene was awkward as shit. Bacara kept glancing to the man - machine - sitting next to him, who kept staring at him. Eventually he couldn’t take it anymore. “What?” “Nothing, Detective.” Bacara ground his teeth. “You’re staring at me.” “Yes, I am watching you.” “It’s fucking unnerving. Stop it.” “Would you like me to close my eyes?” “What? No, just - just look out the window or something. Jesus Christ.” The android turned his head and began staring out the window. The ride returned to the previous awkward silence. “What’s your name anyway?” Bacara finally asked, prompting the android to look over at him again. “My designation is CC-1010, Detective.” The duh was not spoken but heavily implied. “That’s a fucking mouthful to say. Don’t you have a name I can call you?” The LED flashed yellow, whirring for a long time, then very abruptly turned red and stopped completely. The android’s face remained completely passive throughout, but when it turned red he frowned for just a moment. Then the LED returned to blue and his face smoothed out. “You may choose whatever alternate designation you wish.” Bacara huffed. “I’m not naming you like you’re a pet or something. Pick your own damn name.” The LED went yellow again. Back to blue. “I…will think about it, Detective.” The android looked at him for a moment more and then turned his gaze back out the window. Bacara grumbled. Leave it to Androids to make everything complicated.

woooohoooooo

THE SPY AGENCY AU (Who Wants To Live Forever) features the good guys, FORCE and the evil organization SITH feuding against each other for years when SITH send their currently best asset, one of KaminoLabs most successful trainees, Cipher Nine (also know as Fox), to "defect" and thus infiltrate FORCE. Fox does this, thinking it will be easy. And it really is, too, these agents of FORCE are so soft it's kind of embarrassing SITH has so much trouble with them. And then Fox becomes part of the squad. And experiences what living is for the first time, instead of existing. But he is still technically a double agent, even as his loyalties slowly, but inexorably shift... This one borrows a lot of Marvel stuff - SHIELD and HYDRA and so on. Fox is Black Widow completely with the Red Room (here KaminoLabs) Another snippet!

Time to start acting.  It really didn't take much. A few faked moments of vulnerability here and there, carefully avoiding civilian casualties, handing coins to a few homeless kids. Acting reluctant to kill the agents during an encounter. "You're Cipher Nine, right? We saw you were on a mission here." A show of hesitation. "So what?" Fox let a slight tinge of curiosity into his voice. Hook… "We saw how you avoided harming innocents." Innocents, Fox rolled his eyes mentally. "I…" another hesitant pause. "I achieved the mission goal." "Yeah, sure. But you don't really want to do these things, right?" "I don't have a choice. SITH doesn't tolerate failure or…disobedience." Line… "We can help you. You can leave. FORCE would take you in, I swear." Fox let relief show in his eyes, along with a heaping dose of tentative hope, and lowered his gun. "Really?" He asked with a wavering voice. He could almost see Agent Lightning puff up in morally righteous protectiveness. "Really. Just lower your gun and let me bring you in." Sinker.

they are both really big projects and are mocking me mercilessly, but I love them. They're both Foxcare, too, though Fox has to die in the spy au first before something really happens there. (Also, Ponds gets his leg blown off, sorry Ponds)

I really, really appreciate your excitement and love! It makes me smile so wide and really fires me up to write more, even though I am currently in MtaS porn hell.

[]~(￣▽￣)~*

[celestialtangle]

I can rattle off every thought that goes through someone’s head when they see me for the first time.

Their first thought, depending on how good they are at recognising big cats, is always something along the lines of “jesus christ, is that a lion?” Most people aren’t very good at that.

Their second thought starts with the question “what’s the king of the jungle doing in the middle of suburban Melbourne?”

There’s a lot of answers they might come up with for this question.

At least one person apparently thought I escaped from the zoo, despite the nearest zoo being miles away and not even having cheetahs. I've also had people think I'm an off-duty circus performer. That's certainly one answer to that ethical question, but I'd make a terrible acrobat. Others have dismissed me as just being native wildlife, like a wild fox or kangaroo. I’ve managed to convince the kangaroos I’m not stupid enough to attack them, but even if there were any big cats native to the area, I wouldn't be.

If I’m with someone else, people think for a moment that he’s taking me for a walk, before thinking “why the hell would someone take a jaguar out for a walk?” Of all the thoughts I’ve mentioned, that’s the most accurate.

At some point, they notice the things that cheetahs normally don’t have, like hair or hands or clothes. It's usually sometime around here that they relax a little, realising that I'm not trying to kill them. They never fully let their guard down, of course, and I don't blame them.

If they’ve heard the stories of doors left open, kettles knocked over and printouts of Claire Harner’s Immortality, they’ll make a note to check their local news for any maulings or people gone missing. Shortly after, when they realise just how well my clothes fit, they usually erase that note.

Most people don’t bother to ask all their burning questions. They think it’s impolite, or don’t know how to ask them, or just assume I don’t speak English. I’m tempted to just write “yes, idiot, I can understand you” on my coat - but then I'd miss out on all the things they think I can't hear.

I blame the media. Most people, if they even know Ferals exist, don’t know anything about them aside from “near-complete loss of humanity” and all the baseless scaremongering. The “loss of humanity” thing is true, but it's not as nice as it sounds.

But then again, I’m not a Feral.

There isn’t a word for what I am yet, or more accurately, there’s too many words and none of them are right for me.

But one thing’s for sure, the sight of someone bold enough to risk their life, their identity, everything they know for the reward of seeing it through new eyes… It always inspires awe, wonder, fear. Every time. And I never get tired of seeing it.

Do I regret it? No. Just because I’m not a human doesn’t mean I’m not human.

So will you please stop petting me without asking first?

…I would have let you, you know.

[sticks-and-souls]

8, 22? :)

Thank you so much for sending this ask, I've always wanted to do one of these!!

8. What projects are you currently working on?

Long fics! (mostly) Which ultimately means I’m doing a lot of writing and not a lot of posting. I’ve never posted long fics before and I’m discovering that—because I’m trying to aim for certain places in a story—I need to have a strong foundation in my opening chapters. So I’m reworking them and revising them (hopefully not to death) every time I build another chapter. My two main long fics are:

a) Foxiyo political intrigue! I fell into Foxiyo on tumblr by accident (the way most of us have) and was so in love with them and came up with all these fluffy scenes between them that made me want to try my hand at a multi-chapter fic. Except I had no plot.

e.g.  Me: They’re hiding in a supply closet and overhear critical info! The ambiance! Such atmosphere! 

        Also me: What info, Souls??? How did they get there? How can you describe people plotting against them if you don’t have any plot???

…And in the process of finding any plot, I ended up coming up with a LOT of plot. But I really really like it so far and I’m really proud of the world building that I’ve done on the Coruscant political scene and imagining how Riyo and Fox each exist in that world and how they need support (and find it in each other). I’m hoping to start posting this fall/winter.

b) Maul redemption arc via Force Quest(TM) with Ahsoka. I have no chapters written but an entire outline composed of many staple fleshed out scenes, overall plot/character arcs, and main themes. This started as a casual musing of “what would cause Maul to turn to the Light?” that has ended up tackling the big questions about what makes people do evil acts--and when does that cross the line into them becoming evil people, whether people deserve forgiveness, is the world inherently uncaring, covered with loads of my own interpretations of the Light and Dark sides of the Force. 

In the meantime, I miss actually posting, so I have a thranto short-fic of loosely related one-shots tied together (the thranto brain rot is so real) that I’m trying to fit in to my writing time, and also the vibes for Battle Scars just refuse to let up and I have a 3rd chapter idea that’s starting to take shape. 

I have two other WIP ideas with enough of the plot/narrative sketched out that I haven’t let them go yet, but based on how long it takes for me to write content for the projects above that I really care about, I’m not sure I’ll ever get to them. (but if anybody goes rabid over them posted here I’ll consider them more closely). They are:

a) Codywan Pride and Prejudice AU. It would be a parody vibe and I would be trying to practice writing humor but I watched P&P this summer and I think my idea of execution is solid. 

b) Rexsoka Modern-day Road Trip AU. I actually really love this one and if I come back to Rexsoka, I would love to do this. Anakin wants to do the Great American Road Trip for his bachelor party; themes include coming of age, you can never go home but maybe that’s not as bad as it sounds, and found family. 

22. Do you know how your fic will end before you start writing?

If you define writing as “opening a file and starting to create a chapter that will eventually make it to AO3”, then, for the most part, yes (Battle Scars being the glaring exception). The details of that ending are vague, but if I were to give a summary of the entire work, I can tell you the sentence that describes the ending before I decide to start writing. In fact, it’s usually the realization that I have enough plot/character points for a full story that incentivizes me to finally start writing “Chapter One”. 

That said, at least 75% of my “writing time” is a Notes file with my story ideas and completely informal scene sketches. Even for my two “probably never write this” ideas above, I have Notes files several pages long outlining the plot points, random scene details, story ambiance, and even some dialogue for key scenes that I didn’t want to forget. And I seriously will probably never find time to write them. 

Thanks again for asking and I would honestly love to ask these same questions back to you!

[henrike-does-writing-sometimes]

When the Battle Is Over

A little drabble for my magical boys that I started months ago and only now finished lmao. Just lighthearted fluff of the boys recovering from a particularly tough battle :)

(I do wanna write some real angsty fluff with them some day, some good ol’ hurt comfort-)

Word count: 1826 Warnings: Mentions of injuries and blood, but nothing graphic Wip: The Divine Characters: Rei Yamada, Andie Calinao-Fox, Timothy Murphy, Nico Morales, Mike Chandler

: Taglist - @vacantgodling​​​ :

Let me know if you want to be added/removed !

//

"Blinding,"

"Penta,"

"Strike!"

The attack made the ache in their bodies stronger, but it did manage to nullify the monster. Dispelling whatever force had taken hold of it, returning it back to its original form; A pick-up truck, as innocent as can be. Like it hadn't tried to maul them just moments prior. The Celestial responsible for it had been detained and brought to the Sanctuary for questioning hours ago. Leaving the Champions to deal with whatever monsters he'd left behind. It had been quite a handful, more than they were used to in one night.

When the dust had settled, when they were sure the monster was gone, Rei collapsed. Finally able to breathe again. The cold air bit at his lungs, and at his bruises and cuts. Rei hissed as the pain made itself known once more. Especially when his bruised left hand was lightly pressed against the ground.

"Is everyone alive?" Nico called out with a tired voice. 

"Barely." Timothy answered. The same could be said for Andie, who was leaning against the ravenette for support.

“That should’ve been the last one.” Mike said, eyes scanning the area still on high alert. 

"It better have been the last one." Rei muttered. He looked around, only no able to notice how unfamiliar the scenery was. "Does anyone know where we are?"

"The old folk park, I think." Timothy said. "Looks way different during the night, though."

“We’re on the other side of the city?” Andie groaned. 

"That light post monster sure could run." Nico hummed. He then shivered as a near freezing wind swept past. The cold temperature was another thing they’d barely noticed during the battle.

"My house is closest from here," Mike said, "And my parents aren't home for the night so that’s a plus. Though it’s still a bit of a walk to get there…"

“If I remember correctly, the should be a bus stop nearby.” Timothy noted, much to Rei’s disdain.

"No, please. Can we not?" he protested.

"Dude, you can barely stand." Andie pointed out. Rei was about to claim his collapse had nothing to do with his ability to stand, when Nico appeared before him— a hand stretched out for him and a warm smile on his lips. "It's okay, we'll cover you." 

Rei pouted, because while he could stand just fine and hated people looking at him, he was also exhausted. Almost enough to bear the embarrassment. Almost. "Fine." he mumbled and took Nico's hands. 

They walked to the bus stop in a herd, with Rei shielded in the middle. The youngest blocked out the event of getting on the bus. Truthfully, he blocked out most of the ride itself. Because of course there were a few people already seated. And of course they'd occasionally turned their heads to the back of the bus— catching glances of the technicolored, glowing, and very injured Champions. Thankfully no one did more than look, and soon the bus was driving away from them as Mike guided them back to his house. Using his last bit of power to shield them with an illusion as they made their way inside.

When the door closed behind them, the world outside was forgotten if only for the night. Monsters no longer had meaning, the coming day decades away. All that mattered as they piled into the spacious kitchen was then and there. And their several injuries.

It was then they de-transformed. Their Lumens appeared by their side, and immediately curled up on their shoulders. Them too exhausted after keeping the Wielders aetherium in control so it wouldn't kill them after the prolonged battle. 

"I'm gonna get these wee yins some place more comfortable." Timothy said, carefully moving Oid into his arms before gathering up the rest of their Lumens. 

"You can put them in my room," Mike said. "Third door to the left." Timothy gave a curt nod, and as he left he said, "Nico’s bleeding on the floor."

"Wha- shit!" indeed, blood was still running down the side of Nicos head, following the soft edge of his jaw to gather at his chin where it then dropped down onto the floor.

"How has that not dried yet?" Nico questioned out loud as he swiped the blood from his chin. He then went to do the same to the bleeding injury— stopped quickly by Mike catching his wrist in a soft yet stern grip. "Probably because you’ve been picking at it since we got on the bus." he grinned. He then cocked his head towards the sink. “I’ll help you get it cleaned up.”

“How’s your hand doing?” Andie asked and turned to Rei. The boy held it up, and they both scowled at the dark bruises and swelling. “Ok so, not good.”

“Yeah that sums it up.” Rei hummed, then shuddered as the scene flashed before his eyes. It had been the third monster they'd battled that night. By that point they'd started to be affected by the fatigue, which made them less careful, less organized. The monster had landed an easy blow on Rei, sending him to the ground. It had then pinned him down with a foot pressed against his wrist. Adding more and more pressure until Rei screamed. Bones threatening to break. 

"Here." Andie said, snapping Rei back to reality. They pulled out two of the dining chairs, motioning for Rei to sit in one while they plopped down on the other. "Let's have a look at it." 

Rei sat down and carefully held out his arm for the other boy. He winced at their touch, tensing up before quickly relaxing. Andie knew what they were doing, and Rei trusted them.

“Move your fingers?” they requested and Rei did. Slow and shaking. There was a dull ache in the limbs, static buzzing through him as he wiggled his fingers. It was painful, but bearable. 

“Well it’s not broken,” Andie concluded with a smile. “Most likely a sprain. Mike, you wouldn't happen to have anything that could work as a wrist brace?"

"Yeah! I got a few spare ones from when I got carpal tunnel. They're in the bathroom cabinet. First door to the right."

"Thank you!" Andie smiled before leaving the room. 

“Ouch!” Nico’s pained hiss caught Rei’s attention. The auburn-haired boy was sitting on the counter next to the sink with Mike by his side, quickly retracting the wet towel he’d been using to clean Nico’s wound with. “Sorry!” he apologized.

“It’s alright.” the other assured with a smile, and Mike went back to work.

"It doesn't too look too deep, thankfully." he assessed after a few more dabs.

"It’s also a lot smaller." Rei added, recalling how the injury had appeared the size of a saucer when they'd first seen it. Back when Nico had been unresponsive for a few dreadful minutes after having been thrown to the ground like a ragdoll. Had it not been for their uniforms, Rei was sure they’d all been long dead.

Mike hummed. “That’s good, but we’re going to need something stronger than water for this one either way. Hey, Andie? Can you bring-!”

“Disinfectant?” the boy filled in as they and Timothy appeared in the doorway. Both carrying anything and all they might need.

“Yes, thank you.” the older smiled as he took the bottle from Andie, who then turned to help Rei with the wrist brace.

They soon fell into a familiar flow, tending to their wounds in comforting silence. Bandages were wrapped around Mike's upper arm, where a blade had sliced into him. It wasn't deep, but it had gone much further than simply grazing his skin. It had bled a lot too, leaving a dark stain on his teal uniform shirt. Ice bags wrapped in towels were held to Timothy's injured nose. Nothing seemed to be broken, but it was still swollen and bruised, with dried scabs of blood from small cuts along the bridge. Colorful bandaids were littered over Andie's olive skin, hiding the many scrapes they'd gained that night.

When all physical injuries had been attended to, they moved into the living room— collapsing on the couch in one big pile. 

“What time is it?” Nico asked, officially breaking the silence. 

“03:17,” Andie read form their phone screen, and grinned. “Officially friday.”

“Don’t you have cheer practice on fridays?” Timothy said, and Andie’s grin fell immediately as they let out a groan. “Fuck me sideways.”

“You could always call in sick.” Rei suggested. 

“Nah, I can’t do that to my team. Nationals are coming up and we've got a streak to keep up."

"Does it count as a streak if you've alternated second and third every year?" Mike questioned.

"Yes, duh. It's a top three streak, obviously."

"Oh but of course." Timothy drawled.

"Dude fuck off."

“Question,” Nico spoke up. “If you get first place two times in a row does that replace the top three streak or are you on two streaks?”

“Can you even be on two streaks at the same time?” Rei arched his brow. 

“Yes you can,” Andie stated. “Just wait and see, dude.”

"I hope you get fourth this year."

"And I hope your stupid sweaters shrink in the wash." Andie quipped back at Timothy.

"Alright, alright," Nico chuckled and held his hand between the two. "Knock it off, you-" whatever he intended to say next was drowned out by a big yawn.

“Let me know when and I can drive you guys home.” Mike said, failing to fight off a yawn of his own.

“Mike, you’re half-asleep. You’re not driving anywhere tonight.” Timothy muttered. 

“You also have an injured arm,” Nico pointed out, “I’ll just tell my parents I stayed over at Adora’s place or something. They don’t care.”

“If Nico’s staying then I’m not getting up either.” Andie declared. 

"And besides, Rei is already asleep, so." Timothy's voice slurred slightly as he slowly began drifting off. 

“Okay. But we’re getting up early tomorrow, so I don’t want to hear anyone complain more than usual.” Mike smiled as he leaned further back on the couch. The rest seattle down in similar fashion, and soon the whole house had drifted off to sleep.  

Except for Rei. The youngest had been first to close his eyes, intending to fall asleep, but it took some time for him to get there. It always did. In the strange and timeless limbo of not quite awake, not quite asleep, he remained for a while. Listening to the gentle breathing of the others, and occasional snore from Nico. It would’ve startled him, had Rei not gotten used to it. Had he not found comfort in it, odd as it may be. But considering the odd group of people he trusted with his life, he shouldn’t be surprised. 

When, some time later, a big yawn pried his mouth open to escape, it took his last bits of consciousness with it.

"Goodnight, guys." he mumbled gently.

[dmkwrites]

White Wedding

The gang all goes to Alma Bonnet’s wedding. It goes about as well as one could hope.

Blackbonnet with some other stuff

5500ish words

It was the afternoon before Alma Bonnet’s wedding, and she was near giddy with excitement. By this time tomorrow, I’ll be Mrs. Robert Jones, she thought to herself as she flitted from room to room, checking on her dress, the food, her dress again, the dining hall, the flowers, her dress again, as though it might have got up and walked off somewhere. Tomorrow night, Mr. Robert Jones would be ripping that dress—

Don’t go down that road right now, Alma, she chided herself. There’ll be plenty of time for that tomorrow. And the next day. The next morning. And afternoon. And again after tea, of course. And—

Alma screamed into a pillow and then went to go check on the food again, her cheeks flushed.

Mary watched her daughter ducking in and out of rooms like a madwoman, then turned to Doug. “I don’t recall being this worked up when I got married.”

“To be fair,” Doug said lightly, “You very much did not wish to be married in the first place.”

“True,” Mary conceded. “Come to think of it, I did used to spend hours picking out my clothes the night before my painting lessons.”

Doug blushed, but also looked incredibly pleased.

Just then, as Alma was rushing by yet again, there was a knock at the door. Alma screamed, making her parents jump and causing the cook to crush a whole egg into the cake batter. Alma flung open the door, and screamed again. “Robert!”

“Alma!” Robert replied in cheeky falsetto. “My darling, you look like you’re about to need a fainting couch. Sit down a moment.” He took her hand and lead her to the settee.

“What are you doing here?” Alma asked. In the kitchen, the cook had got about halfway through fishing out bits of shell before giving up entirely. “It’s bad luck to see me before the wedding.”

“The day before? Surely it starts after midnight.” Robert sat down next to her, and their knees touched, and Alma thought she might explode. “Anyway, a little bird told me there was a ship in the harbour with a rather exotic looking crew, and my mind immediately went to your seafaring Uncle. Jeff, wasn’t it? You said you invited him.”

“Yes, I did,” Alma said, enraptured by the cut of his jacket over his broad shoulders. “Yes, old uncle Jeff.”

Mary and Doug exchanged a look. “Jeff?” Mary asked, raising a brow. “You… he does know the truth about… uncle Jeff, doesn’t he? You told him?”

“What? Oh!” Alma laughed. “Goodness, yes, I completely forgot.” She took Robert’s hand and beamed at him. She loved the feeling of his broad hands in hers. Mrs. Robert Jones. “Uncle Jeff is Blackbeard.”

Robert laughed. Doug and Mary laughed. Alma laughed. Robert abruptly stopped laughing. “Alma, you’re not serious? Blackbeard was hanged years ago, you know.”

Alma snorted with laughter. “Yes, and my father really was mauled by a wildcat and crushed by a falling piano. Don’t be so naive, Robert.”

Robert drew back his hands and put them stiffly on his knees. “Your father is alive?”

“Well,” said Doug, “This is going about as well as expected.”

***

“Oh!” Stede exclaimed. “You shaved it off already.”

Edward rubbed his chin. “Practice run. Haven’t done it in awhile, worried I might do a hack job.”

Stede gave him a peck on the cheek. “Has been a long time since I saw your chin, come to think of it,” he said. Edward frowned and pulled Stede down for a proper kiss, and Stede giggled.

“Do you prefer the shave?”

“No, you know I’m very fond of your beard,” Stede said. “But it’s kind of fun once in awhile. Jeff the seafaring accountant is quite the fox, you know.”

“Oh?” Ed—or rather, Jeff—strode forward, the heels of his boots thudding authoritatively on the wooden boards. Stede backed into the wall, and Ed leaned over him. “Well hello there, Mr. Bonnet. My ears are burning.”

“Jeff,” Stede said, “I don’t know what you’ve heard, but if my lover Blackbeard catches us in such a compromising position…”

“Blackbeard? Phhff.” Jeff scoffed as he toyed with Stede’s hair. “I’m not afraid of some washed up old seadog.”

“He is NOT washed up!” Stede exclaimed hotly, and Jeff—Ed?—leaned in closer and kissed him hard, pressing their bodies together. It was a full minute before he let Stede come up for air. “Well,” Stede said, feeling faint, “Now I’m not sure which of you I’m rooting for.”

“As long as it’s one of us that’s good enough,” Edward said, and he leaned in again.

“Captains!” Lucius said, bursting through the door. “Augh!” He spun around. “I didn’t see anything!”

“Lucius!” Stede instinctively covered himself, though he was in fact fully dressed, and fully… well. Edward stayed where he was, pinning Stede against the wall, which did make it a bit difficult to converse, but both Stede and Lucius were used to that. “I’ve told you, you don’t need to call us captains, you’re a passenger today.”

“Okay, then why did you make me organize your library though?”

“That was voluntary, and anyway, none of the rest of the crew can read, who else can I get to do it? Don’t be a nitpicking Nelly, Lucius.”

Lucius rolled his eyes. “Well, Stede—“

Stede made a face. “Oh, I’m not sure I like that. Maybe we will just go with captain for now, yeah?”

“Captain—”

“You can call me captain as well,” Edward said. “If he’s captain I want to be captain.”

“Captains—“

“By the way Lucius, I’ve been meaning to ask, how did you manage to retire, anyway?” Stede wiggled out of Edward’s embrace, to which he gave a pout before retreating to his favorite chair by the window. “I mean, I paid well, but not THAT well. You were very hush-hush about it when you left.”

Lucius perked up. “Actually wanted to talk to you about that. Well, I was going to wait until we were on dry land in case Captain Ed wanted to toss me overboard again, but you both seem to be in,” Lucius paused and raised a brow, “exceedingly good moods, so I suppose it’s relatively safe.” He drew a small paperback novel out of his breast pocket and handed it over. Edward popped out of his seat to come look. “I’m a novelist!” Lucius beamed. “A saucy one! It’s an absolute smash hit!”

“The Captain and I. Sounds steamy!” Stede flipped through a few pages. “Using your pirate life as a bit of an inspiration, eh?”

“You could say that,” Lucius said.

Edward’s eyes darted across the page. “That’s the first time you and I met.”

Stede frowned. “What?”

“Right there,” Edward jabbed his finger at the page. “The fearsome pirate king sat at the injured captain’s bedside day and night, smoking his pipe and gazing at his prone form with his smoldering desire barely hidden, that’s me, I did that. I mean, I guess it was pretty smoldering, yeah.”

Stede flipped forward several chapters, to a page where the spine was nearly worn through.

“Hey!” Edward exclaimed, “That one’s the first time we fucked!”

“Ed!”

“Made love,” Edward corrected himself.

“No! I mean… Lucius!! This is—“ Stede caught himself yelling and instead lowered his tone to a very dramatic stage whisper, “This is actually the first time we made love! Verbatim! Were you listening!?”

“Oh yeah, obviously,” Lucius answered, “you can hear everything that happens in here from the galley, you know. Pete and I went down there for some alone time and we were treated to QUITE the show.”

Edward kept flipping through the book. “Gosh, this sure takes you back, doesn’t it Stede?”

“We can walk down memory lane later!”

Lucius held out a rather largish sack of coin. “I did bring your cut, naturally. For the inspiration.”

Edward snatched the sack without looking up from the page. “Feels a bit light.”

“Based on what!?”

“Based on the cashmere scarf you’ve upgraded to,” Edward said, flipping the page.

Lucius made a face. “I just have poor financial management skills, thanks very much.”

Stede had retired to Edward’s chair, hiding himself behind the backrest. “Ed, would you put the book down already? You need a primer on that right at this moment?”

“No, I remember every moment of that night,” Edward said, and Stede grinned a giddy grin in spite of himself, “but it’s nice to read about. Quite poetic actually.” He held the book open by the chair and Stede peeked over the back. “Look at this bit here, that’s downright lovely.”

Stede read a few lines and sat up straighter. “Oh, that’s actually rather tasteful.”

Lucius laughed. “Yeah, the lonely noblewomen demographic eats that nonsense up like candy. You two are disgustingly cute, it makes me a bit nauseous honestly.”

“I suppose since it’s already published… wait a moment.” Stede frowned. “Lucius, what did you come in here for to begin with? This?”

“Oh! No!” Lucius gestured to the deck. “Alma is out there and she is crying like anything. Absolute drama queen.”

***

“The wedding’s off!” Alma cried. “He’s left me! What am I to do?”

“There, there, darling,” Stede said, holding his arms open to his distraught daughter. She walked right past him and instead buried her tear-stained face in Edward’s chest. Stede couldn’t blame her; it was an exceedingly comforting chest to sob into. He settled for awkwardly patting her back. “What’s all this about the wedding? There must be some misunderstanding.”

Alma sobbed harder, then suddenly stopped and looked up angrily at Edward. “It’s your fault!” she cried, jabbing her finger in Edward’s face.

“Me? What did I do?” Edward asked, just as Stede sighed and said “What’s he done now?”

Alma beat her fists against Edward’s chest with surprising force. “I told him your were Blackbeard and father hadn’t been mauled by a wildcat and he just up and left! It’s all your fault! If you hadn’t got a stupid crush Stede would have just died at sea years ago and I could just be normal instead of having three dads to deal with!”

Edward looked at Stede. “She called me dad!”

“Yes, I heard!”

Alma made an unintelligible cry of rage and frustration, and rushed by Stede’s outstretched arms again to cry into Lucius’ shoulder. He rubbed her back. “Oh Alma,” he said, “You were doomed never to be normal.” She cried harder. “But that’s fine! You know I’m brilliant at breakups.”

“Why did you tell him today of all days?” Stede asked. “His nerves must be shot.”

“You only come to visit every year or two, it’s not exactly at the forefront of my mind, is it? I have my own life, you know.”

“That’s a good point.” Stede walked over and ruffled Alma’s hair the way he used to when she was a girl. His little girl. “Now listen," he said, quietly but firmly, “there’s not going to be any breakup. It’s just a case of wedding jitters is all. Ed and I will sort it right out. Alright?”

Alma sniffed and wiped her snotty nose on the back of her hand. “Thank you,” she said.

***

It was early evening when Stede knocked on Robert Jones’ door. Robert came from a family of merchants, and with the death of his mother several years earlier, he had moved in to the rooms about the trading office while his father stayed in their family home and got progressively drunker. Stede admired the building, modest but obviously well-crafted, with a lovely view of the harbour.

“Not bad,” Lucius said. “Could use a woman’s touch.”

“Good,” Stede said, “Keep that in mind, we can use that.”

“Do you have a plan?”

“No,” Stede admitted, “But these things usually work themselves out.”

There was the slow thud of footsteps coming down the stairs, and a tired voice, “Alma, I really can’t…”

“Hello!” Stede said cheerily. “May we come in? Important business afoot, you know. Well, I’m sure you’ve heard.”

Robert looked around in confusion. His eyes were red and his hair terribly askew. Stede reflexively reached out and smoothed it down, which confused the poor man even more. “I’m sorry, do I know you?”

“No, but I know you! Your reputation precedes you, sir. I’m Mr. East, and this,” Stede gestured behind him towards Edward, “Is Mr. India.”

“Who is?”

Stede turned around. Edward was gone. “Lucius! Where’s E—where’s Mr. India?”

Lucius shrugged. “Went off for a piss maybe? I’m not his keeper, am I?”

Stede forced a grin. “Ah, that scallywag! Well, go fetch him, then!”

“I thought I was just a pass—“

“Lucius!”

Lucius sighed and trudged off to wrangle Edward.

Robert was getting quite suspicious now. “Mr. East and Mr. India? As in, the East India Company?”

“Oh good! You’ve heard of us. May I come in?” And Stede barged past Robert and up the stairs.

The rooms above we done up in dark mahogany and teak and sumptuous fabrics to rival his own chambers on the Revenge. Stede’s eyes were nearly popping out of their sockets. Alma had landed a whopper. “How lovely…” he said, awestruck, and then, catching himself, “Sure could use a woman’s touch though! Bit of lightness, yeah?”

Robert smiled a thin little smile and pointed at a needlepoint pillow on the chaise, done up in garish pink hearts and and ghastly skulls. Stede choked back a laugh. Oh, Alma.

“I suppose I’ll have to give that back, though,” Robert sighed. “I don’t need the reminder.”

“Oh?” Stede squeaked, “Trouble in paradise?”

“You could say that.” Robert sat down on the chaise and picked up the pillow, tracing the little hearts and skulls lovingly with his fingertips. “She… kept a big secret from me. A couple. I’m not sure I can move past it. It would be an absolute scandal if anyone found out.”

“Scandal? What fun!” Stede said, and he sat down next to him. “Come on now, you strike me as the sort of fellow who can appreciate a bit of notoriety, eh? Spices things up!”

“I guess.” Robert clutched the pillow against his chest and slumped sideways. “I don’t know.”

“Maybe… it’s not the scandal? Maybe it’s the secrets?”

Robert peeked up at him. “Perhaps… it’s the secrets. They’re some big secrets. I thought we shared everything.”

Stede nodded sagely. “Why do you suppose she chose not to share this particular secret, then?”

“Well, if it were anyone else, I would think they were ashamed, but since it’s Alma…” Robert looked into the middle distance, pondering, “…honestly, she probably just forgot.”

Stede laughed heartily. “Yes, that does sound like Alma. I mean!” Stede panicked. “Alma is a lovely name, but does lend an air of… well, you know.”

Robert smiled a little, and sat back up, his shoulders held a little straighter. He had a dimple, in only one cheek, when he smiled. Charming. Alma really had done well. “You must be Mr. Bonnet,” he said. “I’m pleased to see you were not indeed mauled to death by a wildcat.”

“Actually, it was the piano that did me in! The wildcat was just for the drama.”

“Wasn’t a piano dramatic enough?”

Stede shrugged. “You only die once, you know.” Robert actually laughed at that one, a hearty laugh from his gut. Stede smiled warmly at him. “You also only live one life, you know. Mary told me that, and it’s always stayed with me.”

“So,” a voice came from the doorway, “What life do you want lad?”

“Absolutely I want to marry Alma,” Robert said, “Like, so so much. She’s amazing. Do you know she made this herself?” He thrust the pillow into Stede’s face.

Edward walked over, Lucius close behind. “Look at that, she used the design I sent her!”

“Where were you?” Stede hissed.

“Nowhere,” Edward said.

Stede turned to Lucius. “Where was he?”

“Oh, I can’t tell you,” Lucius replied, “It’s too good.”

Robert stood up and brushed his wrinkled jacket flat. “Terribly sorry for the state of things,” he said, gesturing to a half-eaten pound cake sitting on the side table next to a piled of damp handkerchiefs. “You must be Mr. Bonnet’s crew, then.” He held out his hand. “Robert Jones, pleased to make your acquaintance.”

“Lucius Spriggs.”

Edward griped Robert’s hand with such force it shocked him. “Blackbeard,” he said.

Robert nodded, and immediately started hyperventilating.

Edward rolled his eyes and looked at Lucius. “Why does everyone react like that?”

Lucius rolled his eyes right back. “Introduce yourself as Edward instead of Blackbeard then, yeah? You’re obviously doing it on purpose.”

Robert cleared his throat and tried his damnedest to act cool, and failed. “I thought you’d… uh… have a beard? Is it like an irony thing?”

“Blackbeard has a beard,” Edward said, then tapped his head. “Jeff does not have a beard.”

“I know it sounds stupid,” Lucius admitted, “but it honestly is that simple. Most people are idiots.”

“…is your finger made of wood?”

Stede stood up and started slicing into the poundcake with a strained smile. “Rob, you wouldn’t happen to have some tea would you?

***

The three passed a very pleasant afternoon. Stede told Robert flowery tales of their recent adventures in the Chinese seas, Robert playfully chided Edward for plundering his father ships a full six times, and Lucius ate the entire remaining poundcake slathered with marmalade. It was going to go straight to his thighs, but he rather liked his thighs, so that was fine by him. Finally, once Edward had drunk through Robert’s entire sugar bowl, they took their leave.

Robert felt a kind of lightness in his chest. Everything he’d thought about pirates had been wrong. Being the Gentleman Pirate’s son-in-law might not be so bad. He was just like his dear Alma, after all. And Blackbeard had been nothing like the stories. He was downright lovely, in fact.

Edward shook Robert’s hand vigorously at the door. “Wonderful to meet you, just fab, I’m so looking forward to the wedding. Alma will be so pleased, so pleased indeed.”

Lucius breezed past with a “Bye,” a little too ashamed to thank him for the tea he’d absolutely demolished.

Edward went last, and he paused at the door while Stede went ahead, and he turned back to Robert. Robert suddenly felt uneasy. It was like a switch had gone off. In that instant, he had no doubt in his mind he was actually meeting Blackbeard for the first time.

“If you break Alma’s heart,” Edward said, softly, in the kind of voice that knows it commands a room, “I’ll pull your guts out by your nose and string you up in the town square. For fun.”

Robert went pale.

“You understand me, boy?”

Robert swallowed and nodded slowly.

“Say it, then.”

“I understand you, sir,” he squeaked.

Edward nodded, then strode back to Robert and clapped him on the shoulder with a wide grin. “Welcome to the family, son!”

***

“Where were you, really?” Stede asked when Edward caught up with them.

“Just now?” Edward replied, and he thumbed back at Robert’s place. “Just having a bit of a laugh with old Rob.”

“Not that,” Stede said. “Earlier, you disappeared all of a sudden. Where did you go?”

Edward pushed on ahead. “Was I gone?”

Stede frowned.

***

Edward squinted at the clouds at sunset and proclaimed the next day would be clear and sunny, and so it was, a perfect spring day with a refreshing breeze blowing in from the east. The crew and passengers of the Revenge made their way to the church, the only time some of them would step foot in one in their lives. Lucius was dressed in a modest but stylish tailored jacket and incongruously ostentatious cravat. Edward was dressed like a doll in all Stede’s fanciest dress, though the little flowers twined in his hair were his own doing. The rest of the crew were outfitted in a combination of Stede’s odds and ends and their own least threadbare clothing.

Stede, in disguise as “Jeff’s” servant, was wearing plain brown linen borrowed from Doug, and a pair of spectacles that made him rather dizzy. He trudged along next to the lying, no good, conniving Edward, and pouted.

“What’s the matter with you?” Edward asked. “Too underdressed? Do you want to borrow my pocket square?”

“You know what was really the issue with Robert and Alma?” Stede said, refusing to look at him, “It was the LYING. LYING ruins relationships. One shouldn’t LIE to their partner. Breeds nothing but trouble. Don’t you agree, Lucius?”

“Don’t bring me into this please.”

Mary waved at the bunch from the door to the church. “You’re late, you’ll all have to sit at the back. Except Jeff, of course we saved you a seat at the front.”

Stede sighed, but made to sit in the back pew.

“Mary, dear,” said Edward, loudly, for the rest of the church to hear, “Can’t we squeeze old Easton here into the front with me? I don’t want to trouble you, but I’ve got a flareup of the old gout, you know. All those Chinese delicacies. Goes straight to the toe.”

Mary smiled knowingly. “Oh, I’m certain we could make some room. He can have Louis’ place, he’s away at school.”

Edward looked back at Stede and winked. Stupid sexy wink, Stede thought, but he also thought of seeing Alma from the front pew, and he scurried to Edward’s side. He offered him his arm to lean on, to keep up the charade, and Edward took it, closing the gap between them, close enough for Stede to smell lavender soap as the walked together down the aisle. He breathed in deeply.

They took their seats without incident, and the ceremony began.

Alma was resplendent in her mother’s veil and a dress adorned with yards of French lace, plundered from a trading vessel several years prior and set aside by dear uncle Jeff for just this occasion. Once the ceremony started, Stede noticed the dress quivering slightly, and wondered if it was nerves, but then realized she was tapping her foot impatiently as the vicar droned on.

“I don’t get all this god stuff,” Edward muttered, “What’s he got to do with love anyway?”

“Well, I think it’s nice,” Stede whispered tersely, though he very much agreed. He’d almost fallen asleep at his own wedding, and only managed to stay awake because he’d also felt like vomiting the whole time. Alma and Robert exchanged rings, and Alma was beaming, and Robert’s hands were shaking as he tried to slip the ring on Alma’s finger. Stede remembered Mary’s sullen look, and his own shaking hands.

Suddenly Edward’s hand was on his, and Stede realized his own hands were shaking now, and he didn’t know why.

The vicar joined Alma and Robert’s hands together. “Those whom God has joined together let no one put asunder,” he cried, with much more dramatic flair than expected. There was a loud sob from the back of the church, and half the guests turned around to look.

Black Pete was attempting to comfort a blubbering Lucius. “He always cries at weddings,” he said apologetically.

***

Jeff stood up after the ceremony and invited all the guests who wished to join them on the Revenge to celebrate and “indulge in a taste of the orient,” which was code for get wasted on rice wine and century eggs. Most of the guests happily obliged, and the odd procession wound its way down to the docks and on to the ship. Stede tossed away his glasses and went straight for his hidden cache of brandy.

Edward watched, quietly.

***

Some time later, as the Swede was singing an aria in tribute to the newlyweds to a confused but enraptured crowd, Stede stumbled up to Mary and Doug and sat heavily on a nearby barrel. “Was there a brothel by the docks? And how long does it take to go to a brothel, anyway?”

“You’re spiraling,” Mary said, sipping her drink.

“I’m not!” Stede replied, eyeing Edward across the deck. “I’m barely… I’m barely even going in circles!”

Mary turned to Doug. “He’s spiraling.”

“You don’t have to tell me.”

***

“You married Spanish Jackie!?”

“Yeah,” Frenchie beamed. “It’s great! We fuck now and then, and when she dies I get half of everything.”

Jim frowned, tapping the tip of their knife against the table. “Why half? Doesn’t she have like twenty-five husbands now?”

“Yeah, but I’m her favorite!” Oluwande and Jim exchanged a look. Frenchie’s face slowly fell as he came to a realization. He slumped forward and put his head in his hands. “I own half a pyramid, don’t I?”

Jim howled with laughter and Oluwande patted Frenchie’s arm. “Sorry mate.”

“I mean, the sex is still great, so.”

***

“A toast to dear Buttons!” Wee John cried.

Roach sniffled. “He’s with Carl now, it’s what he’d want.”

“To Carl!” the Swede yelled, raising a bottle.

Buttons coughed and rolled over.

“Oh, never mind,” said Wee John.

***

“How are the kids?” Stede asked, his words hardly slurred. He wasn’t spiraling.

“The orphans?” Jim shrugged. “Fine, I guess. Alive. Eating all Nana’s oranges.”

Stede nodded. “Alive, yes! Fab! A good thing to be! Any luck finding them some parents, then?”

Jim gave Stede a quizzical look. “Why the hell would I do that?”

Stede’s smiled wavered in confusion. “Isn’t… isn’t that the point of an orphanage? If you’re not trying to find them homes, don’t you just… have children?”

“Shut up,” Jim said, and stormed off to get another drink.

“Don’t mind them,” Oluwande said, “they’re in denial about the whole being a parent thing. Sorry about that.” He pulled his chair up next to Stede. “I, however, embrace it wholeheartedly.” And he proceeded to gush about his daughters for a full half an hour, and Stede ate up every moment.

***

Pete sidled up to Lucius. “So… you still have the finger.”

“Shut up.” Lucius grabbed Pete by his shirtfront and began to pull him down the nearby corridor to the galley. “You’d better be leaving with me this time or I’ll really never speak to you again.”

“Yes sir.”

***

Alma turned to Robert. “Having any regrets joining this motley crew?”

Robert smiled. “You know, your ‘uncle’ threatened to string me up by my own guts if I hurt you.”

Alma smiled wryly. “That sounds like him.”

Robert took Alma’s hand and rang his thumb across her wedding ring. Her heart sped up, like it had the first time he took her hand, helping her out of her carriage. “Do you know what I thought about that, Alma Jones?”

“Fuck me, I guess I have to go through with it now?”

“No.” Robert turned his gaze back out to the party, where Edward was drinking Doug under the table. “It made me think, Good Lord, if Alma can wrap the fearsome Blackbeard around her little finger like that, what chance did I ever stand after all?”

Alma laughed. She stood up and tugged at Robert’s arm, shooting him a coy look in the lamp light. “Let’s get out of here,” she said.

***

“Let’s get out of here,” Edward said.

Stede looked up from his drink. “What? Why? Mary and I were catching up.”

Mary waved her hand. “It’s fine, it looks like I’ve got to help Doug stumble home before he passes right out.” She slammed back the rest of her rum, and Stede thought again how much more fun it was to be her friend than her husband. She wavered across the deck and kicked Doug lightly in the ribs before helping him to his feet.

“Come on,” Edward said, and Stede followed, because what else was there to do?

The pair made their way across the docks and up a nearby hill, a place Stede had often come to watch the ships passing in and out of the harbour in his old life. The Revenge danced and bobbed with laughter and music and lamplight. Edward set about starting a fire while Stede watched him, admiring the skillful way he arranged the kindling. Stede never got tired of watching him, honestly. Everything he did was fascinating. The version of him who’d sat on this hill dreaming fifteen years ago would have never have imagined this. Could never.

“You’re mad at me,” Edward said, lighting a match.

Stede snapped out of his thoughts. “Right! Yes!” he said, remembering he had been upset with Ed earlier, and then immediately, “I mean, no! Of course not! What are you talking about?” as he remembered that he hadn’t wanted to let him know that he was mad.

Edward added a few more branches to the fire and looked at Stede over the flames, the smoke wisping about his face, and Stede’s chest ached. Edward came around and sat next to him, and Stede leaned against his shoulder, and completely forgot what he’d been upset about.

Edward reached into the pouch at his waist and took out a small box. “I got this for you,” he said. “Yesterday. That’s why I was gone.”

“Oh?” Stede said in embarrassed falsetto, feeling an absolute fool. “Were you gone?”

“You literally asked me about it. About four times.”

“Ah, that.” Stede said sheepishly. He took the box. “Thank you. I should have trusted you.”

Edward shrugged. “You get all weird when we come here,” he said. “Not your usual weird, mind. Different kind of weird.” He put his arm around Stede shoulder. “You’re not that guy anymore, you know? That bloke got mauled by a tiger.”

“Jaguar,” Stede laughed. “Or was it an ocelot? Some wild cat. Very cool death, anyway, I have to say. Mary said the boys in town talked about it for months at the pub…”

“Open the box.”

“Right, right.” Stede fumbled the little box open, and then gasped. Inside was a gold ring, beautifully fashioned to resemble two hands clasping.

“I know it’s not as fine as most of the rings you have,” Edward said. He could feel the heat rising in his cheeks, and cursed the absence of his beard. “Apparently they don’t keep the fancy things in stock at the shop, stupid business model if you ask me. But I dunno, I kind of liked this one.”

Stede’s eyes went wide. “You BOUGHT this? At a store?? With money???”

“With the money from Lucius.” Edward frowned. “Shouldn’t I have? I thought you’d be mad if I just robbed him…”

“No, no.” There were tears in Stede’s eyes as he took the ring out. “It’s beautiful. I love it.”

Edward smiled, relieved, and he took the ring from Stede’s trembling hand and put it on his ring finger. “I don’t know about before god or any of that nonsense,” he said, looking Stede in the eyes, “But I swear to you, Stede Bonnet, I will never leave your side so long as there’s still breath in my body, and beyond.”

“Oh my.” Stede shook out his damp, balled-up handkerchief and wiped his tears. “You’re going to haunt me, then? Is that supposed to be romantic?”

“A little, don’t you think? It’s a bit romantic I reckon.”

“It’s awful, just wait for me in… wherever. Hell, I suppose.” Stede laughed. “Come to think of it, perhaps it would be better to be a pair of ghost pirates. Anyway,” and he laughed again, “This is so silly, but I actually have something I wanted to give you as well. I suppose now is as good a time as any.” He fished a small brown paper packet out of his breast pocket and handed it to Edward, his hand still shaking.

Edward raised his eyebrows and unwrapped the small packet. Inside was a gold ring set with a giant ruby surrounded by diamonds. It sparkled in the firelight like nothing Edward had ever seen. “You bought this for me?” he asked, awestruck.

“Of course not!” Stede exclaimed. Then he leaned in with that conspiratorial grin of his, and whispered, “I stole it off a corpse!”

“No!”

“Yes! That raid we did last month where all those idiot Frenchmen died of scurvy, you remember. I’d been looking for a ring for ages and when I set eyes on that I knew it was perfect for you.”

Edward laughed. “You’re the only one who would see something like this and think of me.”

Stede wasn’t laughing now. He took the ring and slipped it on Edward’s finger. “I’ve told you time and time again,” he said quietly, “you wear fine things well.”

They sat like that, hand in hand by the fireside, for a few minutes, the kind of silence where you didn’t need to say anything at all.

“Aren’t you going to say a vow, though?”

“Oh, right!” Stede panicked. “I… um… I’ll haunt you as well!”

Shit. That wasn’t right. But Edward was laughing, and then Edward was kissing him, and that had never once lost its shine, so Stede supposed it was fine anyway. He cupped Ed’s face, stroking at the rough stubble, his heart as full as it had ever been.

“I love you, Mr. Edward Bonnet.”

“I love you, Mr. Stede Teach.”

Just as the two leaned in to kiss, there was a loud sob from behind a stand of trees. Stede looked up, brow furrowed. “Lucius?!”

“I’m sorry!!” Lucius peeked his head out, tears streaming down his face. “I told you I always cry at weddings!”

[biohazard-inevitable]

I’m just gonna ramble into the void here about my Overwatch Self insert but soley in actual gameplay terms and stuff like- no plot is in this ramble its just how i would work mechanically in game if I were in game because I’m a fuckin dingus about that kinda shit.

Still here? Okay so-

First of all, I’m a tank hero, my health is right around that of doomfist and junker queen in the area of about 400 with some shield health as granted by my fox spirit, Shugo.

Main weapon is either a claymore or dual wielding katanas, though i also think having kunai knives as my main skill and then having a katana or claymore as like a big slash skill similar to junker queen since we are currently in the poke meta it seems with heroes like rammatra and junker queen being introduced. So i’d need some long range and close range capability, and while yes story-wise I can use a bow, I think also story-wise since i trained mostly with the blade i would use a blade in combat rather than a bow (plus it just looks super cool)

As for skills, i can create a shield that can be placed similar to sigma’s (and ow1 orisa) that is a permenant shield and can be recalled. It looks like giant shrine gates to tie me into kiriko since me and kiriko are twins. I can also do a self heal similar to roadhog, but it doesnt do as much as hog’s and its similar to kiriko’s where the animation is i put talismans on my arm, its mainly just for survivability.

As for passive things, like every dhimada, i can wallclimb, but thats about it.

I’ve tried thinking about alot of things for my ult and compared them to current tank ults in game and i think i’ve settled on having a giant square of shrine gates appear and anything within them gets mauled by my fox spirit in an animation similar to hanzo’s scatter arrow, and it’s basically a giant aoe scatter arrow confined to the square that my ult puts up. Square is about the size of lucio’s aoe heal/speed if you were to measure it with something.

Anyways thats all i have for the ramble kk goodbye

[subbyfoxelf]

[movie review] teen wolf (1985)

i’m actually a little in awe of how thoroughly teen wolf delivers on just about everything you might expect when you hear its premise. dork who gets bullied? check. said dork is pining away for an unattainable girl? check. he has another friend who is pining away for him while he’s pining away for her? you bet. his newfound powers make him good at sports which results in him becoming uber popular which results in him being kind of a dick to people in his life? totally. inspired by a newfound sense of humanity, he plays the championship game without his powers and helps his teammates discover that it turns out the basketball was inside them all along? that would be telling. (also, yes.)

so, okay, there’s actually a key point at which this could’ve been a much more predictable, and (if you ask me) probably a much worse movie: michael j. fox’s character could’ve hidden his werewolf nature at all costs and most of the dramatic tension in the film could’ve been about him being in various social situations trying not to wolf out. a lot of other movies would’ve taken exactly that course, and i probably would’ve fallen asleep. (though, maybe not, because this movie is so quirky in other ways that i can’t imagine it being “normal” even if it had taken that route.)

there are definitely some things here that bug the crap out of me (casual homophobia, the fact that the film had to make such a big deal out of michael j. fox’s character snubbing the pretty/popular girl at the end), but it’s all pretty standard-issue 1980s hollywood stuff which i’m pretty much always prepared for when watching a movie like this. it wasn’t nearly enough to ruin it.

as hot as it was seeing a werewolf dominate basketball games, though, the wolf makeup was pretty fucking ugly. he didn’t even have a snout! disappointing.

also i kind of hate how in both of these movies the protagonist has to learn humility by not being a werewolf. werewolves fucking rule! you shouldn’t be ashamed of being a werewolf if you are one, you should come here and maul the fuck outta me!

i mean, yeah, these movies are hardly the worst offender in that regard. like especially in older movies you just want to groan out loud at all the guilt & angst people have about transforming into hot furries once a month. but it’s still disappointing to see both of these movies go from “werewolves are awesome!! fuck yeah!!” to “actually you should try not being a werewolf.” just not my vibe, man! b-rank

[speckles-the-pupper]

1- I am a werewolf! Meaning, a human who has wolf shifts. Wolf therian is fine too, but I find werewolf to be a much cooler label

2- I am a black wolf! (which is technically a gray wolf, species-wise) While not being theriotypes to my knowledge, I also have fursonas being a bat-eared fox, dog, reindeer, sparklewolf, velociraptor, and cinereous vulture! I am also pupgender.

3- I do have shifts, which for me if the primary reason for identifying as alterhuman. I’m not sure what’s meant by “most common shifts.” My shifts don’t seem to have a trigger that I can tell. When I shift I just go wolf brain, crawling around, chewing on stuff, rolling on the floor, etc. For phantom shifts I mostly get it for my tail and fur, and sometimes my ears.

4- It actually doesn’t come up very much. The only significant thing is that I’ve started doing cardio so that wolfy can have more stamina when I shift.

5- Here on Tumblr, I’d say it’s pretty kind and inclusive! Over on TikTok though, I think there’s a huge amount of watering down going on. Such as the huge focus on gear and quads, saying things like “therians don’t actually think they’re animals” (plenty do!), and just in general lots of misinformation. I swear, the community looks so much different as an outsider, as opposed to when you get involved yourself. I just think the TikTok community is trying too hard to look normal to the non-therians to a point of watering us down. But hey, that’s just me.

6- I like to make dog treats for myself! This is the recipe I use. They’re pretty good I’d say, but nothing too sweet. Using a dog bone cookie cutter makes it twice as euphoric!

I also get euphoria from sticking my head out of the car window, chewing on my dog bone chew toy, howling at the moon, growling, laying in my dog bed, and drinking from my dog bowl! That’s a fun one to try I’d say. Drinking water by lapping it with your tongue is mega dog.

7- I actually don’t! All my disphoria is gender related. I’d say I feel human through and through, but sometimes I become a wolf. I don’t feel as though I’m a wolf in a human body. Rather, a human and a wolf together in a human body.

8- I’m not sure! I’m recently awakened myself! I guess for one, don’t feel the need to rush into things, or force yourself into a label just to finish the self reflection process. Just observe who you are to the best of your ability, and go from there!

9- I do! I have a black wolf mask I made! It’s actually made on a plastic cat mask that I’ve had for years. It used to belong to my aunt who was an artist. I’ve inherited most of her art supplies when she died, but I’ve been incredibly hesitant to use any of it since it’s so finite. However, using the mask (which has been catching dust for years) to create something that’s so important and representative of my true self feels like something she would have loved. And because of that, the mask means all the more to me! I also have a ton of fursuits, though unrelated to my theriotype.

10- Probably the autism, I’d say. Maybe trauma or something or another. I do remember concurrently as a child whenever something incredibly distressing happened, I would imagine myself as a wolf taking revenge. Like if it was a person, I would maul them in my mind. I don’t really have that anymore, and it’s possibly unrelated, but that’s the only instance of wolf behavior from when I was young. As of late, it seems to have popped up almost spontaneously.

11- I don’t know anybody yet, rip. I’m new here (not to Tumblr but to the alterhuman tumblr community) so hopefully I can get equated with some fellow creatures soon!

If you are a alterhuman, reblog and answer these questions!

(don't be afraid to write a lot, do what you want ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯)

1/ Which category of alterhumanity do you belong to?

2/ What/who is/are your type(s)? (if you have any)

3/ Do you experience shifts? If so, can you tell us your most common shifts and your strangest cameo shift (if you've ever had a cameo shift)?

4/ How do you experience your alterhumanity in everyday life?

5/ What do you think of the community?

6/ What are the things that make you most comfortable and euphoric in your alterhumanity?

7/ Are you experiencing species dysphoria?

8/ What advice would you like to say to a young alterhuman who has just awakened?

9/ Do you have/want to have gears?

10/ Do you know/have any theories about the origin of your alterhumanity? If so, tell us! (all beliefs are legitimate)

11/ Tag someone/a creature to answer these questions!ㅤᵕ̈

[tarre-was-right]

ROUND TWO: MATCH-UP FOUR

Genuinely did not expect this one to happen, but here we go!

Remember, this is NOT about who would win in a fight. This is about who makes the best leader for Mandalore as a whole.

Explanation post

Seeding

Propaganda below the cut! You can submit more on this post and I will reblog it back to here!

TARRE VIZSLA

Anon: He was both a Jedi and a Mandalorian warrior. This means he had at least some knowledge of politics and how people work, and was a badass fighter. Both are important for leading a culture with a heavy focus on combat. He could also get advice from the Force, even if it was just a vague sense of whether or not something's a bad idea. (Also he was the one who created the darksaber, which isn't important on its own, but since it's his saber being used as a symbol of leadership, that implies he was at the very least a decent leader.)

ALPHA-17

@ihuntmonsters: He’s uhhh super badass and sexy and kicks ass and is really awesome and I’m in love with him Perfect propaganda yes. He shall lead Mandalore

Anon: He's pretty good with training children! He is very good at inspiring loyalty! He is very willing to go after sith lords with just his teeth if he has to!

Anon: Vote for Alpha he’s got Cody’s thighs, Fox’s tits and Wolffe’s ass. He’s also a DILF, if you consider the shebse squad/command batch headcanons. And who wouldn’t want a Mand'alor like that?

Anon: Alpha-17 would be a great mandolorian leader I mean look at those Pecs! What else do u need in a leader?

Anon: HERES WHY ALPHA-17 FOR THE WIN: HE WILL ASSASSINATE ALL OF THE OTHER POLITICAL FIGURES WHICH MEANS DEAD SKEVY SHEEVY PALPATINE AND WHO DOESNT WANT THAT?

Anon: What a guy. I love him so much. He's such an asshole. Alpha-17 was part of the second test batch of clones of Jango Fett, one of a group of 100, and as such he was trained directly by Jango Fett in the art of war; these early batches who had more contact with their Mandalorian trainers are commonly considered to have a stronger claim to 'Mandalorian-ness' because of this exposure and learning experience than clones from the later, larger batches

Anon: Propaganda for Alpha 17: tall

Anon: Alpha-17 should rule Mandalore because a good king doesn’t want the power of the throne and he does not want that at all. also he’s the funniest choice. might have the skills to not get killed by maul

NEW: @ihuntmonsters: more propaganda for alpha-17: - he takes no shit from anyone he will kick ass - sassed obiwan the sassmaster multiple times - oh god oh god oh god oh god i love him i love him i love him

[irresponsibility101]

hi i’ve done something stupid again

CLONE WARS AS GEMMA COLLINS QUOTES

because i need something to do with my time, also no the first one is not ob*kin, because that’s fucking whack

Anakin: i told [obi-wan] i love him. it’s proper cringe.

Padme: kiss my designer vagina

Obi-Wan: I’m 34 I’ve earned my divaship

Obi-Wan, after order 66: get that fire exit door i’m off

Ahsoka during the mortis arc: no i don’t want to play anymore games, i’m fucking gamed out. i’ve had enough of playing games. fucking hell—

Fox: i’ve just seen something really fucking scary in the mirror

Rex: this is very expensive hair. it’s fucking frazzled because you’ve only got straighteners in here, you haven’t got heated rollers. straighteners are what fucking weirdos use on their hair

Cody: i’M CLAUSTROPHOBIC [GENERAL]

Fives: it’s like having a job, working 24/7, for two days on the trot

Echo: i’m a massive fan of the dictionary

Ventress: i just want my life back, instead of playing fucking stupid tasks all day for a £200 shopping budget

Dooku: i’ve never seen gruel in my life, i thought it was something made up for oliver twist films.

Maul: like that’s death, that’s death, death, death, death, death. it’s all death.

Mace: these [senators] are fucking idiots

Kix, narrating: [Hardcase] and [Jesse] are playing with a lemon in a sock

Quinlan: sometimes i do wish that i had someone who’s very financially stable

[dannybobany]

THIS IS ALL SO FUN OMG HEHEHE

some of it is accurate to the au and some of its not- and some of this I plain haven’t thought about

To say that Micheal, Elizabeth, and CC had better lives here then In canon is partly true

Even in death I think the only one who ended up suffering was Elizabeth (she fell face first into a springlock suit, I’m saving the full story for another time) but after her death Elizabeth made friends and generally had a better experience than she would have (her and Fritz mci have a goldenduo kind of thing)

Micheal’s death on the other hand was a lot quicker, like canon cc he dies in the bite of 83, but in this scenario it’s by is own hand and not someone else’s- basically him and his buddies were fooling around with a camera getting pictures with the animatronics and they’re taking pictures with this side stage animatronic “lovely the fox” when one of them says it be cool to get a picture that made it looks like the fox was mauling them right? So Mike sticks his head in the mouth and he really should’ve listened to mommy about how delicate the springlocks can be because SNAP-

And funny enough it’s still cc’s birthday, poor kid, can’t catch a break

Speaking of cc (I’m going to call him Cecil from this point because that’s his name here and it’s a little easier for me) one thing you said about him is actually something I never considered but I do think is true, Cecil wanting his mother’s attention

I think it’s in a sort of different way than Elizabeth, something about Cecil and how he treats himself (especially after his siblings die) is that he can never really be satisfied with who he is as a person for a lot of the time, how could he be? They say when a young person dies their image is eternally attached to innocence and a sense of perfection in death because they didn’t get the chance to be bad people

So in Cecil’s eyes he can’t really live up to that can he? Everything they did would be more valuable because they’re gone now, and the only other living family member he has is his mother who is also this perfect person to him, everyone likes mom, moms good at everything, everybody wants to be like mom, so he thinks- and concludes that he also wants to be like his mother

So he spends his life trying to mimic her, he tries to make animatronics though he’s not the best at it, he’s better with the designing then the construction and.. actually doesn’t like to get his hands dirty so he’ll end up putting half built little dolls away for months a time because believe it or not forcing yourself to do a hobby can make that hobby not fun!

So he tries other ways to be like his mother, he starts working at the different locations as early as he’s allowed (16) and he works hard too! A waitress called out? Get the bosses son over here! The hostess quit? Get the bosses son over here? We need a spare technician? Get the bosses son over here! He gains a reputation for filling in wherever they need a spare hand, people think he’s a good kid, and that he works too much for his age…

And yet, after all he does, he can never seem to be this unobtainable standard he’s set for himself- and you know what? Clara sees him doing this to himself and she doesn’t intervene, she’s got a work-based philosophy and thinks that this IS the point of success for him and she’s proud of him for achieving that (even if she doesn’t say so)

Wow ok that was a ramble and a half !!! I think I will be done for now but further statements will likely be made as separate posts because you got me thinking bout Cici and thus I must go insane !!!

So given one of the main bits of my fnaf au is “Clara is the killer instead of William” I haven’t actually been talking about William all too much- a shame!

William in the au is a really great guy actually, he’s a devoted husband and father and he even gave up his career to stay home with the kids— although maybe he’s a little too devoted, because even after he finds out his beloved wife kills people and even after she kills HIM he’s still very in love with her

It’s awful it really is the guy cannot move on even though he’s trapped in the clown bunker- even as he’s forgetting her face day by day, he knows he loves her

(YOWZA SOMONE GET THIS GUY A COPEING MECHANISM !!! THIS ONES NOT VERY HEALTHY !!!)

[fandom-imagines-stories]

Saving Grace S2 E2: Nowhere to Hide

S2 E2

Fox Mulder x Reader

Words: 2496

Summary: The reader  and Alex’s investigation is interrupted by a familiar face. Something about this case isn’t right and the reader and Scully both know it. 

Notes: Making my timeline is a little difficult, but I believe I’m using the years from the character Wiki pages so nobody come after me for inaccuracies haha. The timeline for this series is extensive. Also, sorry this is late, I honestly forgot yesterday was Monday. 

More Mulder Imagines: HERE

-

The map glared back at him with mocking lines and smeared red ink. Three shiny pins blinked and shined under the fluorescent light. Around him, the clutter of files and records and photos had turned his office into the den of a mad man. Well, at least more than it already was. 

“Three missing scientists… one corrupt research institution…” He slammed his hand down on a blurry security photo with the subject just barely caught in the frame. “And Krycek.”

His musing turned to rambling, as they often did, and he paced around his office, trying to make it all connect. Somehow, he knew. If he followed the trail of Zimtech trying to clean up its mess, he would find you. 

The door opened and his phone started to ring. Scully entered, her expression unreadable. She stared at the report in her hand with an intense perplexion. Before she could share her information, however, Mulder quickly answered his phone. 

“Mulder.” His greeting held that desperate hope that only Scully recognized. As if every time he answered the phone, he expected it to be you. And, like each call in the past three months, she watched his demeanor fall. This time, however, whoever was on the other line piqued his interest. Mulder shot across his office, phone tucked between his shoulder and his ear, and jammed a new pin into the map on the wall. 

“What is it?” Scully asked. He put a hand up and listened to the voice. 

“And you’re sure the name is Greenwich?” He inhaled sharply. Scully just continued to watch in confusion. Mulder’s intense focus was something she’d grown used to, but this was different. He seemed almost hopeful. 

He slammed the phone down on the receiver and looked at her with wide eyes. The fax machine beeped. Scully remembered the report in her hand. 

“Mulder, there’s something I think you should-”

“Greenwich, Scully,” He exclaimed. “I’ve been having the Lone Gunman keep tabs on all of the missing person reports that connect back to Zimtech.” Mulder took the paper from the fax machine and pinned it next to the map. “Dr. Albert Greenwich- one of the lead scientists at Zimtech was reported missing by his wife under the alias of Marc Plum.” 

He pointed at the side by side picture of Dr. Greenwich and the missing persons report for Plum. The same man- though Plum looked significantly more disheveled than the doctor in the Zimtech uniform- looked back at her. The connection to his excitement was still unclear. 

“We’ve been tracking missing Zimtech employees for months,” she said, “what’s different about him?”

He started pacing again.’ “When we started investigating Zimtech, Y/N had an informant form the research department. She never told me much about him other than the name he gave her- Mr. Green.”

Scully nodded, understanding now. “And you think if you find her informant…”

“I find my wife.” 

There was a long pause. Scully wanted to believe he was right, but the case in her hand kept coming back to her mind. She handed him the paper. 

“Dr. Mira Lagosi was also one of the head researchers in Zimtech’s zoology department. She specialized in DNA and altering the genetic makeup of mammals.” 

Mulder glanced over the paper with confusion. “What does this have to do with finding Y/N?”  

Scully handed him another page. “Dr. Lagosi’s body was found in her apartment this morning. She appears to have been mauled to death. Due to the state of her body, the coroner is having difficulty with some of the details, but he put the time of death around three days ago.” She cleared her throat. “Apparently, there was a gas leak in the building so no one was there to notice the smell.” 

Mulder looked over the case for a moment, but handed it back to her. 

“Greenwich has been missing for only 36 hours, making him the more recent case. Y/N will be there.” 

“I don’t think we can just toss this aside,” Scully said. “This is the first time we have a body to examine.”

“Which tells me that it probably wasn’t Zimtech.” He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. “My best bet is to keep following the trail Y/N is leaving for me.” 

“How do you know Y/N is the one leaving it?” She asked. “The only person you’ve connected anything to is Krycek.”

“She’s with him,” he said. His shoulders slumped slightly. “I know it.” 

Scully hated seeing him like this. Desperate. Defeated. But something in her told her this case was the one. 

“We can’t ignore this case,” she sighed. 

Mulder nodded. “Then I’ll go to Nevada alone.”

“Mulder-”

“I’ll look into the Greenwich case while you find out what happened to Dr. Frankenstein.” His tone was final.

Scully didn’t see any other option. She tucked the file into her bag and started towards the door. 

“I’ll call you if I find anything,” she said. She turned back towards him. “Be careful, Mulder.”

He simply looked away, staring at the pins in the map. 

-

It didn’t make any sense. You’d tracked Lagosi’s every move since she’d become Professor Maggie King at the local college. Alex and you canvassed the whole damn town, playing the happy couple on vacation, and nothing was turning up. Three days was too long to stay in one place. If you don't find her soon… well you certainly weren’t looking forward to that phone call from Zimmer.

You waited in the car, listening to some crappy talk show while Alex stood at the payphone. He never told you who his informants were, but whoever it was certainly pissed him off. You absent-mindedly observed the world around you. People out on morning jogs, older couples grabbing breakfast at a diner, a young boy tossing out newspapers. 

One paper landed close enough to the car that you could see the headline. Your heart leaped into your throat and you scrambled out of the car. 

“What the hell?” You muttered. 

“I thought I told you to-” Alex whined, but you thrust the paper at him before he could finish. 

Police Investigate Death on 42nd Street.

“At least it explains why we haven’t found her,” you said. “Looks like something got to her first.” 

“That isn’t possible.” He read the article in disbelief. “We would have heard about it. Zimtech would have heard about it.”

“Unless they set us up.” You said through gritted teeth. There was no way your lack of information was an accident.

Alex threw the paper to the ground. “Well, Mrs. Carter, looks like our job just got a little more complicated.”

You sneered. “Stop calling me that.” 

-

Blood stained altex fell into the trash. Scully turned off the light about the table and removed her goggles. The autopsy- of what was left of the body- revealed what she’d expected. Dr. Lagos was essentially ripped apart. Cause of death was blood loss, but several of her organs had also been removed. They appeared to have been clawed out of her chest cavity. By what, she had yet to determine. It almost seemed feline. 

She finished gathering her things and made a mental note to call Mr. Y/L/N to check on Grace. She’d also need to call Mulder and tell him what she’d discovered so far and see if he’d found anything about Greenwich. The thought of calling Y/N entered her mind before she could stop it. 

This was easier when you were here. 

Dana shut the door and started down the hallway of the coroner’s office. Facts floated around in her mind, attempting to cling together to form theories. Nothing stuck. How could a predator like a cougar or lion have gotten into Lagosi’s locked apartment? Sure, the window was open, but she lived on the seventh floor. No such creature could have climbed the fire escape like that. Not unnoticed anyway. Mulder would probably suggest some kind of werewolf. She almost wished he was here to distract her with his crazy theories. 

She’d need to go back to the crime scene to see if the local authorities had missed something. Plus, the drive across town would give her a little time to think. All of this meant something. It just didn’t make sense yet. 

She didn’t know that someone had gotten there first. 

“What the hell happened?” You grimaced at the gruesome scene before you. While the body was gone and investigators had already gone through everything, the blood stains on nearly every surface painted a clear enough picture. 

Alex stepped over a shattered lamp. “That’s what we’re here to figure out. Time to break out all of that Academy training. You used to be Violent Crimes, right?” His tone made it sound more like a jab than genuine interest. 

You ignored him. He seemed to think now was a good time to push you. 

“Yeah…” He mused. “That’s how you met Mulder. The weirdo genius kid from BSU.”

You gritted your teeth. “How do you know that?”

He chuckled. “When are you going to get it through your head? I know everything.” He smirked at you, satisfied that he’d hit a nerve. 

“Less talking. More looking.” You snapped. You had to fight to keep the memories from flooding your head. They were too painful now. But he knew that. 

“I can see I’ve struck a nerve, Carter.” He still said the name with a smugness that made you want to punch him. Thankfully, he stopped there. 

Christmas lights framed the doorway of the building. Scully noted the lack of police cars. Shouldn’t there be a team watching the crime scene? Her phone rang before she could finish the thought. 

“Hello?”

“Scully, it’s me.” Mullder’s disappointed voice greeted. “I think you were right. There's no sign of Greenwich or what happened to him. No sign of Y/N.” She could hear him kick over something, probably a chair. 

She took a deep breath. “I was about to call you. I think something seriously strange is going on here, Mulder.” She hit the elevator button, still observing the odd quietness around her. 

“I’ll take the first flight to North Carolina.”

Dana sighed. Until she had any evidence that Y/N could be involved, there was no need to get his hopes up. Reaching the floor, she walked towards Dr. Lagossi’s apartment.

If Alex had still been making his snide remarks, you wouldn’t have heard the footsteps outside, accompanied by a voice that shot panic through your chest. You grabbed Alex by the lapel and shoved him into the closet. Unfortunately, the small space only fit one. 

“What the hell?” He objected. 

“I’ll handle this.” You slammed the door just as the front door opened. 

“No. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve. Go home and spend it with your daughter.”

You could almost hear his voice on the other line. Scully closed the door behind her and looked up. She froze, eyes locking with yours. 

“Mulder… I’ll call you back.” 

-

1992

You sat at your desk. Mulder sat at one of the tables looking through slides. You had a mountain of memos and taxes to go through before Blevins started breathing down your neck. A knock pulled you out of your work, but Mulder didn’t lose his focus.

“Sorry, nobody down here but the FBI’s most unwanted,” he said. 

You rolled your eyes. “Fox.” 

He looked at you the same way he always did when you called him by his first name. Annoyed, but affectionate all the same. 

A woman you didn’t recognize entered tentatively. She had red hair, bright eyes, and curious air about her. Your desk was closer, so she approached you first. 

“You must be Agent Y/L/N,” she said. She held out her hand to you with a kind smile. “Dana Scully. I’ve been assigned to work with you and Agent Mulder.”

“Isn’t it nice to be suddenly so highly regarded?” Mulder had turned around, his usual cynicism thick in his tone. 

“Ignore him.” You stood, taking a little more effort with the weight of your eight-months pregnant belly. “If it were up to him, I’d be working as soon as I could stand after labor.”

“You make me sound so insensitive,” He said in mock offense. “I’m actually very interested to see what Blevins is concocting by sending Dr. Scully to us.” He stood, crossing his arms and leaving back on the table. “So, who did you tick off to get stuck with this detail, Scully?” 

“Actually I’m looking forward to working with you.” She turned back to you. “Both of you, once Agent Y/L/N gets back, of course.”

“Please,” You smiled, “call me Y/N. Unlike my partner, I’m not into the whole last name only thing.”

“Alright, Y/N.” From the look of her polite, yet intrigued smile, you could tell you were going to like her. “I’ve heard a lot about the two of you.”

“And I was under the impression you were sent to spy on us.” Fox snarked. 

Mulder proceeded to be Mulder, but Scully didn’t seem deterred. Yes, you were definitely going to like her.

-

You just stood there, frozen by her stare. Her expression morphed from shock to disbelief to confusion and back. 

“Dana-” You started. She cut you off with a hug. 

“I thought I’d never see you again.” She said. You could feel the tears welling in your eyes and hugged her back. For that short, perfect moment, it felt like you had a part of your life back. But then you remembered why you were here and who was with you. You pushed away. 

“Dana, you can’t be here.”

“What?” She exclaimed. “Y/N, we’ve been looking for you for months. What are you doing here? Where have you been? What’s going on?”

“You have to leave. They probably already know you’re here. When they find out you saw me-”

“What are they making you do? Are you the one that’s been killing those people?” She stepped back. 

“It’s…” You took a deep breath. “Complicated.” You put your hands on her shoulders. “I need you to go home. Keep yourself safe. Keep them safe.”

She shrugged your hands off. “Do you have any idea what this has done to him? He’s driving himself insane trying to find you. He goes home to a daughter who doesn’t understand why her mother isn’t coming home and he has to try and be both parents.”

“I’m doing this to keep them safe,” you cried. 

She shook her head. “It’s time for you to go home. Y/N, please. We can-”

A flash and a thud stopped her. Scully fell to the floor. You rushed to help her, pulling her into her arms. Alex stood over her, having hit her with the butt of his gun. 

“What the hell?” You exclaimed. He looked at you furiously. 

“Nowhere to hide now.” 

-

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Mulder: @posiemax; @muldersufo; @springholland

[everybody-loves-purdy]

... but the instances of dogs killing the cats ARE few and far between? Four dog killings in 20 years of stories and hundreds of cats over even more time in series? That doesn't even keep up with real life. The cats run into dogs constanly that just chase them or are even friendly all the time, and they live out on the farmland where I presume they're dealing with farm dogs who are trained to attack predators like foxes and coyotes to protect livestock. They aren't running into some well trained tiny show dogs, its a whole pack of dogs that have no owner in sight out in the farmland obviously something's gone wrong.

Also it's a series about cats, they're gonna use their "natural enemy" for the drama and of course no matter what it's going to be brutal and horrifying from the perspective of the animal being killed in the scenario. Also they're predators, maybe some dog lovers don't wanna hear anything bad about their precious babies but dogs sometimes just kill small animals, like all the time, even when they're just playing. There is a reason you leash train them, and don't just let them wander, and you have to replace broken toys. They are predators. And this is before you bring the fact that these books are simply dramatized from the perspective of cats.

Two instances of an onscreen mauling across nearly 100 books where cats die left and right does not indicate they "hate dogs". Honestly given how incredibly rare it is despite how close these cats live to dogs and how every single time there's a clear excuse even if it isn't outright stated shows the opposite, and given they go out of their way to show cats who have dog companions it comes off as the opposite.

Dogs are one of the cat's predators that they face, it's not hatred to depict dogs being predators, or do they also hate badgers and snakes? Especially snake bites get significantly more greusome kills. But I guess no snake lover is going to accuse them of portraying snakes doing what snakes can do from the perspective of their victims as "snake haters." Do they hate cats because of cats like tigerstar and darktail who are depicted specifically with malicious intent and even the good cats have kills under their belt? If the series was told from the perspective of the mice they kill every day? No, I don't think anyone would.

Out of curiosity just because I’m not sure of the connection- but why would UK authors have anything of relevance here? Just genuinely curious since I’m from the UK and I wouldn’t know the relevance here.

We were just talking about how recently the brutality of dogs attacks has seemingly increased while there are less dog encounters overall. In Vicky’s era curious, boisterous, presumably not too harmful dogs popped up from time to time and chased the cats around for a bit but that seems to be much less so recently. Now when dogs are used at all they only seemed to be used for the purpose of causing a particularly brutal death rather than chase scenes. I remember a chase scene in Hawkwing’s Journey and maybe one in apprentice’s quest? But in Vikcy’s era these chases did seem to have more frequency.

And I am extremely aware dogs are predators, and will kill things (in the warriors universe they are the non-cat animal directly responsible for the most known animal attack deaths), but the recent portrayal of dogs in warriors just seems to generally be more savage as a whole than they used to be.

Like I mentioned (but I don’t think I made clear sorry) I really don’t think it’s dog hatred I just think it’s a case of “ok we need a brutal kill - dog attack is effective here” because let’s face it, for books set in the UK bloodlusted dogs would be the most dangerous animal threat for a cat to face. What I’m trying to say is that there seems to be a slight shift in how dogs portrayed recently - but again I should stress I don’t think this is dog hatred, just a convenient threat paired with probably not having enough time to put a chase scene with a terrier or something in at another point.