#i’m actually on the verge of a full on mental breakdown

[oncamelliastreet]

please send me asks if you see this literally everything is SO shitty in my life rn i need a distraction so bad

[butnotbubblegum]

using the tags to vent my current emotional state into the void bc ig story feels like a bad plan for this, don’t read them if you’re having a bad day, they’ll probably not help in the slightest.

[jcbmcdrmtt]

Sorry if I am not as good about tagging stuff for the foreseeable future. I shattered the screen of my tablet (to the point where there are chunks missing and glass dust coming off under your fingers and you can see the electronics under the screen), and I normally use that + a keyboard case to browse tumblr. I’m using my phone now which means a.) no physical keyboard, and b.) I don’t have as much battery life so my time is more limited. I do not see a point where I can replace the tablet or get it fixed anytime soon either.

All that coupled with the fact that I normally use tumblr in a browser, not the mobile app, means it’s a lot harder to tag things now, especially if I can’t just tap to apply OP’s/the reblogger’s tags because they didn’t add any or i don’t like what they used etc.. Tumblr mobile is honestly tiny and kind of crap on my phone browser - the keyboard makes the screen elements squish together and some things like tag rearranging are broken.

TL;DR: You may possibly see more untagged posts from me in the coming weeks. I apologize, understand if you unfollow, and just. Yeah. I guess I just wanted to explain myself as I normally pride myself on my tagging etiquette.

[hyuckswoman]

alumnusbf!mark helping you study

pairing: alumnus mark (who’s also your bf) x reader

genre: fluff

summary: you’re stressing over this one subject until your bf appears

“fucking hell” you mutter, your finals were in a week and you were currently studying the subject you have been dreading since the beginning of the study period. Studying for exams was not fun. Especially when you had this gnawing feeling in the pit of your stomach telling you that you were 100% going to fail.

markie

hey babe, you busy?

upon hearing the notification, you cursed at yourself as you swore you put your phone on do not disturb to avoid distractions .Yet here you were grabbing it to check the notification. turns out you did put your phone on do not disturb but since your boyfriend (who had to practically beg you to get removed off there texted you) was the origin of the notification, your phone still notified you.

being too lazy to write back, you just decided to call him

“hey, what’s up? I’m studying for my finals right now” you say after greeting him “oh really? I’m sorry to disturb then, how long have you been studying?” your boyfriend mark asks “hours. i literally had a full on mental breakdown studying the course because i suck at it and it feels like no matter how hard I study I just keep on failing” you say sighing “did you cry?” mark asks, maybe he knows you a little too well. “yea” you sigh yet again, it bothered you to see how big of a toll your academics were taking on you

“that’s a good thing then! wait no I don’t mean you crying is a good thing I meant it’s a good thing I’m on my way with food and stuff to give you a break” your boyfriend says making you laugh “mark, look I really truly appreciate it but I also really need to study” you say. honestly seeing how fucked you were because of this one course you couldn’t allow any distractions, and lord knows mark was a pretty big one

“no I know, we’ll just eat and then I’ll help you study. trust when I’ll leave you’ll be back in your academic weapon antics” mark says. after weighing your options (not that you had much of a choice seeing as though he was already on his way) you figured that maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea. you had the chance of having a boyfriend who already graduated which meant he already passed this course so maybe it’d actually help

“hi babe, i brought food” your boyfriend says, you were glad you had a boyfriend that supported your big backed antics. “i might make you my male wife at this point” you said as he hugged you. you guys then decided to turn on the tv and put a show none of you cared about for the sole purpose of having some background noise.

“okay, we’ve been slacking off for long enough, let’s get to studying now” your boyfriend says. you almost forgot about your finals for a second.

“okay, we’re done making the flash cards, quiz time” mark says quietly laughing upon seeing your face. “every right answer you get, i’ll kiss you” he says finding a way to motivate you as you looked like you were on the verge of dying. “I don’t think it helps, you distract me too much. i’ll probably only remember the kisses and not the actual class material” you reply. As much as it didn’t look like it you were seriously (for once) in the mood to study, you couldn’t let this pretty man distract you no more.

a short while after you were thrown over your desk defeated because what do you mean you only got like half the questions right???

“I don’t understand I’ve spent literal hours trying to memorize this shit I’m sick of it I just want it to be over” you sigh, this is the first time you’ve struggled this much over a school subject. usually being a bit above average doesn’t require you a lot of efforts so you never really tried that hard to pass your classes throughout the years. college beat the shit out of you tho!! you found yourself completely taken aback by the difficulty and you had to learn how to properly study throughout the years. if somebody asked you, you’d say you’ve got studying covered but seeing how this study session was going maybe you didn’t…

“I think you’re getting those wrong because you don’t understand this part” mark says patting your head as you mumble an ‘i know’. being the very considerate boyfriend he is, he then proceeded to explain the entirety of the material, dumbing it down whenever you looked up at him confused or when your eyebrows frowned a little too much. he also was so very patient, explaining the same things to you three different times as you had already forgotten what he said as soon as he moved on to another topic.

the dedication mark put into your academics was just too much for your heart to handle, you loved him so much and the fact he didn’t mind spending his evening studying with you instead of doing literally anything else warmed your heart. that’s why you didn’t have it in you to tell him you were getting gradually sleepier and were fighting your mind to stay awake because how could you when he looked so good concentrated trying to explain to you what you deem as the most incomprehensible subject ever.

“y/n? i feel like I’m losing your attention are you- oh.” mark says finally looking up from your study sheets seeing you asleep on your desk “pft, I didn’t know I was this boring damn” he laughs. since you were already in your pajamas and were in a position where the man could not carry you to bed he decided to gently shake you to wake you up “hm? I’m sorry I fell asleep markie, thank you for studying with me I love you. let me read the cards again to make sure I understand better” you say your voice a bit groggy “what? no go to sleep, nothing you read now will be effective just rest and sleep will take care of the memorizing for you” mark says preparing your bed for you “okay but only if you join me” you say already laying down under your covers “of course dude, let me put the things away and I’ll join you” mark says as he looks over to your half awake self that’s seemingly waiting for him

being in front of your final paper makes you realize even more how lucky you are to have mark in your life because you knew damn well that if the study session never happened you would have been shitting bricks internally crying over how much you don’t understand but now you got out of the final feeling confident you didn’t fail. you ran up to mark who was waiting for you to celebrate final period being over and he couldn’t help but mimic your immense grin as you told him how the final went better than what you had expected and thanked him for his help. He did refute by telling you it was all you and your mind but settled on taking a little bit of credit after you threatened him.

it was kinda crazy how mark made everything easy, every single thing without exception. looking at your boyfriend eating his meal you couldn’t help but smile thinking about how much you loved that man and how lucky you were to have him in your life.

[stardust-sunset]

lol crying headcanons??

Ponyboy Curtis

He is a quiet crier

Like he just sits with his mouth slightly open and his eyes shut for a moment before he just lets out the quietest, most pitiful sob you’ve ever heard

He’s very sniffly and gaspy when he cries

I feel like he’s the type to apologize for crying because he has a toxic mindset when it comes to emotions

“I’m sorry, I *gasp* don’t know wh- *gasp* what happened, I…”

He can’t even finish his thoughts

He kinda likes to be held when he cries. He never openly admits it but the gang knows he just likes to be hugged so he can bury his face in someone’s shoulder

NEVER cries in public. Ever.

He waits until he gets home and locks himself in his room

Sodapop gets to him the fastest in terms of calming down. Darry is still learning but he’s Pony’s second best bet

He always cries after a nightmare. Every single time.

Soda wakes up almost every night to Pony’s face buried in his chest while he just trembles and he feels his chest getting wet with tears and snot

He doesn’t mind at all

One time Pony actually went to Darry and nearly scared the shit out of him until Darry realized it was just Pony

Hes very hiccupy too when he cries

Sodapop Curtis

Oh my god, the loudest crier you’ll ever hear

He sounds like he’s being strangled when he cries (out of sadness or anger at least)

Hes a huge bawl baby. I’m sorry. Even as a baby he constantly screamed and cried.

When he’s genuinely sad he literally just dinks to his knees. He’s not even trying to be dramatic. It’s like everything is weighing on his so hard he can’t stand up

When he’s angry crying that’s when you know he’s on the verge of yelling. He only goes off on Pony and Darry one time and it was directly after the death of their parents because Pony said something downright nasty to Darry about how if it weren’t for his birthday their parents would be alive and Darry shoots back with if Pong used his head more maybe they wouldn’t have had to go back for it

And Soda just bursts into tears and blows up

“SHUT THE FUCK UP! BOTH OF YOU! YOU DONT FUCKING TALK LIKE THAT ON MY PARENTS NAMES! YOU DONT FUCKING DO THAT! THEIR DEATHS WERE NEITHER OF YOUR FAULTS SO DONT YOU DARE FUCKING SAY THAT! DONT SAY THEIR GODDAMN NAMES IF YOURE JUST GONNA USE THEM IN YOUR ARGUMENTS! DONT EVER SAY THEIR FUCKING NAMES AGAIN!”

Pony and Darry just go quiet because Soda is standing there trembling like a chihuahua, tears streaking down his cheeks, his blonde hair a mess and his cheeks red as he quietly gasps for air and hiccups between words

That was the only time he ever really fully angry cried

When he happy cries he’s a straight up delight

His cheeks get all rosy and he has this big smile and he just lets out a mic between a laugh and a sob as he gathers whoever made him happy enough to cry in a bone crushing hug

Hes genuinely a pretty crier (fuck him honestly like stop being pretty for two seconds god)

His cheeks get all red and his brown eyes get all glimmery. He’s straight out of a fucking soap opera I swear

Bro uses up all his fuel crying. Whatever emotion it is afterwards he’s always like “Darry I want food :/“

Darry Curtis

Darry like…never cries. Ever.

But honestly? When he does cry he’s having a full blown mental breakdown or something has to happen to make him cry

In the book, Pony kinda said his chest shook when he sobbed and I kinda see that happening

He tends to tremble a lot when he cries. His hands get all shaky. That’s usually the first indicator he’s working himself up.

Second indicator is that his legs start bouncing and he starts pacing like a caged animal

Then he just starts sobbing. And it’s rough.

Like in the book I feel like when Pony came back he just ended up holding Pony in a bear hug while he ugly cried into Pony’s shoulder

He’s kind of a mess when he’s crying

He tries to soothe himself but honestly it doesn’t really work. So Sodapop takes over for a bit.

Soda knows exactly what to do and post book, Pony starts helping more too

Soda is the one to ground Darry when he cries. He’ll hold Darry, rub his back, rub his neck, play with his hair, whatever

Pony is more vocal. He helps bring Darry back to reality because usually Darry’s crying bouts come from anxiety and things from the past that pop up and give him a hard time

Pony knows all the breathing exercises and tends to help Darry out a lot with regulating breathing

Darry honestly just needs alone time after he cries. He cries so hard sometimes he just needs to go to sleep after

When this happens, Soda and Pony will do little things around the house. They fold the laundry, wash the dishes, one time they even deep cleaned his truck

They also leave little notes of envouragment around where they know Darry will see it. That also helps calm him down.

maybe i’ll make a pt 2 lol

[rainydawgradioblog]

New College Freshman Anthem: Taylor Swift’s “You’re on Your Own, Kid”

Okay, okay, I know. Since Taylor Swift’s Midnights dropped on the 21st, it’s been talked about a LOT.  But...as the token dazed and confused freshman of the Rainy Dawg blog, what I’m about to write about felt pretty fitting for my first post. For any of you out there having a rough transition to college, or any big life change, give this one a solid listen. 

The emotional devastation of this song starts off strong with the line “Summer went away, but still the yearning stays/I play it cool with the best of them”. After going out, night after night, for weeks and spending the whole time thinking about the people I used to hang out with in high school, I was (needless to say) intrigued. The combination of discussing the feeling of desperate, nostalgic yearning with the act of playing it cool in a setting full of new and absurdly awesome people takes a magnifying glass to the exterior of nothing but fun and an unbothered attitude that I myself and countless other freshmen have put on for the last couple of weeks. (Plus…“I touch my phone as if it’s your face,” which also made my jaw hit the floor since I had done that exact thing about 2 hours prior) 

Then, the highlight lines of the pre-chorus, which repeats twice, are the similar “I search the party of better bodies just to learn that you never cared” and “I search the party of better bodies just to learn that my dreams aren’t rare.” The combination of these two lines is perfect to model the slow and devastating deconstruction of what is well known and familiar that happens at such a drastic and quick change like moving into college. This pre-chorus leads into just two brief lines, the refrain and title of the song, which says “You’re on your own, kid/You always have been” which sums up that lonely, jarring feeling of moving out all too well (pun intended). 

Finally, it would actually be a federal offense to write a detailed post about this song’s lyrics and how a college freshman could relate to them if I didn’t talk about the actual star of this song (and dare I say the entire Midnights album), the bridge. She starts with the same melody and first line of her pre-chorus, “From sprinkler splashes to fireplace ashes,” following that line up with “I gave my blood, sweat and tears for this,” a common sentiment among all burnt out high school graduates who actually managed to make it to the school they dedicated so much of high school to getting into. “I hosted parties and starved my body/Like I’d be saved by a perfect kiss” rubs salt in the wound, evoking classic freshman pitfall images, and all the momentarily satisfying but crushing things that sudden freedom offers. Another heavy hitter? “My friends from home don’t know what to say” After the daily phone calls to friends 3 time zones away, simultaneously elated and on the verge of a mental breakdown? Ouch.

But before you start wondering “who is this kid writing a depressing rant about how she’s scared of college for her first blog post?” Wait! Because the most important thing about this song is how it ends. The hope and reassurance that this song ends with is the exact message I think so many freshmen, and anyone who’s feeling a little lost and caught off guard, really needs to hear. As she turns the corner and reminds her audience that “Everything you lose is a step you take” the song feels less despondent and more inspirational. “So make the friendship bracelets/Take the moment and taste it/You’ve got no reason to be afraid” reads like the gentle advice of a big sister, as the melody and beat pick up in the background, and she ties up the mental journey that this song represents cleanly as can be. So to anyone reading this that’s a fellow lonely freshman, feeling a little lost, or with some reservations about your future, me and Taylor are here to remind you that “Yeah, you can face this”.

Stay cool,

K-MURPH!

[oldsoulplato]

Emoji

I am 34, and I still respond to texts with emojis, reactions and random gif memes.

Often, in the official context, as baffling as it may sound, when I’m having a real-life conversation, my mind wanders off to find which emoji would’ve been perfect for responding. I’ve just aged, somewhat horribly, over the last decade and a half, with only parts of my brain coping with the emotional intelligence required for being a grownup. Despite my reluctance, I’ve lost hair, and traded a few for grey ones. Growing up comes with a price.

In our twenties, we read about independence in the thirties. But here, in my mid-thirties, I realise that unpaid, prepaid and postpaid bills hold us captive. My life now revolves around office, doctors, bills, recession, inflation, simply put – enslaved by the 9 to 5s/6s/7s/8s, while the 1520 mm mercury pressure of work, office politics, ‘poor communication’ squeezes the life out of what little free time we might have in our hands.

‘Poor Communication’. Such a vague-ass word that’s thrown around in the professional world as if it’s supposed to mean something. On one hand, if you ask for help, you’re incapable. On the other hand, if you don’t ask for help – you failed to communicate on time. You present facts – you need to summarise. You summarise – you must communicate in full. ‘Communication’ is an art – the kind of art everyone understands – except for the communicator of course. The biggest loads of cliched rubbish in the world. If a simple emoji can work for our personal lives, why do we chain ourselves with words that don’t matter in our professional world?

Pardon my blabbering. I am on the verge of having a breakdown, and I’m holding myself together with duct-tapes. It’s frustrating that we can’t talk to anyone but strangers about nonsense surrounding our lives. I loathe myself for being a serial procrastinator. I can’t help myself. My anxiety and depression often cripple me to the point that I keep self-sabotaging myself. I’ve been circling around this avenue since 2001 – since before my teens – and I am trapped in this bottomless abyss.

As I write this, I realise, I am only prolonging my misery by not getting on with the work that I am actually supposed to be doing now. I can’t help myself. I only wish I could communicate to someone the fragile mental state I am currently in. I’m bitter, angry, anxious, sad, glum. I only wish I had an emoji that could appear on my forehead screaming for help.

[thesecondface]

don’t look up

first order of business on christmas day: watching the nihilistic satire that is don’t look up. I have not laughed like this in a year, it is utterly FABULOUS, doesn’t at all take itself seriously (and let me just tell you how pleased I am that they made the comet a rubble–pile in their models, they actually scienced the small details!)

highlights include:

AILF (astronomer I’d like to fuck)

jennifer lawrence, timothee chalamet and leo dicaprio walked into a (car) 

jennifer lawrence is a “phd candidate” who looks like rooney mara from the girl with the dragon tattoo, timothee “you’ve got some church game” chalamet is an evangelical skateboarder, leo dicaprio is a scientist on the verge of a nervous breakdown with no science communication skills and the general scientist’s lot

the general scientist’s lot: panic attacks, crashing depressions, high blood pressure, restless leg, weight gain WHEN I TELL YOU I DIED

“the world is ending in 6 months and 14 days” followed by “can I meet your mother in 7 months?”

“michigan state? really? let’s get this information to the ivy leaguers... and cambridge”—did me in, because as per usual, nobody ever knows any other unis outside of the oxbridge and the american ones

leo dicaprio: such palpable on–screen anxiety that I felt it where I was sitting this poor dude

ariana “I have a tattoo of a shooting star” grande, going on instagram live saying “guyyyysss this comet stuff is really stressing me out” in the face of literal annihilation 

nobody cares that the world is about to end, a solid third of the world is more concerned with ariana grande, another third thinks it’s a conspiracy theory, and the final third are capitalists who want to exploit the situation

the phones that autobuy ariana’s new song

“I’ve been thinking about the free snacks... why would they make us pay for free snacks?”— jennifer lawrence’s fixation on this with the looming extinction level asteroid incoming (and the commentary on the capitalism in general, where the only thing that trickles down is the mentality and not the goods)

ariana, the fucking SONG, the beautiful subtitles of “you’re about to die soon everybody [vocalising]”

“was this even peer reviewed?” WHEN I TELL YOU I DIED PT II

teddy “I just have more skin pigmentation than you, because your ancestors migrated to europe” oglethorpe getting arrested my poor bae

cate “my grandfather invented flash–freezing and I have four master’s degrees, know three languages and slept with two former presidents” blanchett

all the commentary on corporate capitalism: president meryl streep taking on a trump persona, in the pocket of billionaire not-elon with his company not-space-x, diverting the mission to blow up the asteroid because it’s chock full of PGEs and that’s trillions right there

america: the saviours of mankind (and virtually no mention of any other country; I think this was an intentional dig at all the american–oriented disaster movies)

the NEPOTISM: president meryl and her son jonah hill (who she later FORGETS, I—)

timothee chalamet introducing himself with “hi i’m firepuma162751585 on twitch, do you game?”

the conspiracy theories; “there is no comet” and the whole commentary on intentional ignorance of clear evidence, denial mentalities, sheer stupidity etc. with the “don’t look up”. fabulous

the tide-pod cinnamon blast off challenge

an american ‘hero’ on the mission to save the world, giving a speech live to said world about saving “all those beautiful white folk working hard at home”. same american shooting the comet with a gun going “YOU’LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE”. 

the repeated “just a different generation” STILL DYING, I AM

the chris evans cameo and the goddamn movie poster, for camp sit on the fence (look up AND look down!)—they covered every camp, lemme tell you

surprisingly poignant dinner table scene at the end of the world. the cheery, trembling voices, the premature use of past tense while ignoring the shaking house, lauding the store–bought apple pie. fabulous acting

the billionaire ship at the ending, and the garden of eden vibes before prompt carnage via space dinosaurs

jonah hill, last man left alive

they did not hold back. the societal commentary was real, it was frighteningly realistic in some ways and hilariously fatalistic in other ways. it was depression with a side of hilarity come to life, and I loved it. 

[avpdpossum]

sometimes i forget that other people can feel embarrassed at all because i forget that other people don’t experience embarrassment as the unbearable, life-ending, earth-shattering thing it is for me

because there is no such thing as mild embarrassment for me, if i’m embarrassed at all there’s a 110% chance that it’s putting me on the verge of a pretty spectacular mental breakdown — being embarrassed has caused me to totally lose the ability to do the thing i was doing when i got embarrassed and have to spend the next 6 years working toward even being able to do it alone, being embarrassed has made me throw away job opportunities that i desperately needed, being embarrassed has almost always been the cause of my suicidal ideation and has triggered the closest thing to full psychosis i’ve ever experienced, every time i’m embarrassed feels like the whole world is crashing down around me

so the idea of someone being embarrassed and then not spending the next month agonizing over it and trying to shift everything in their life around to ensure that it never ever happens again is just...so unrealistic to me that it’s easier to assume anyone who can do something embarrassing and not react that way must just not feel embarrassment at all

i’ve only really just started realizing that yeah, actually, everyone feels embarrassed from time to time, most people can just...do things anyway and be embarrassed and maybe even intentionally do things that they know will embarrass them (shock! horror!) and then move on with their lives after because for them, it’s not nearly as intense and is ultimately just another feeling

i wonder what that’s like, to not have to rehearse and scrutinize and second-guess every single thing you ever want to say or do or even think because embarrassment is just an annoying but manageable inconvenience and not literally the worst, most excruciating thing that could ever happen to you

sounds fake to me tbh but apparently that’s a thing some people experience...fuckin wild

[kremeforkian]

kian lawley x female reader

once again, all fluff. whatever that even means. (not a writer).

summary: you never asked for help as your mental health slowly got worse, not liking when you seemed vulnerable or weak.

ignore the random paragraphs. the app decided to let me know that my paragraphs were too long. so judgemental. i’m not sure if i even like this one, my writing was all over the place. anyway, don’t let me stop you from reading.

It had been a hard month. you’re anxiety was creeping it’s way back, eliciting old habits to plague your daily life. you felt held back. a sense of dread had found a home in your stomach, tossing and turning, always making you feel like something bad was ahead. you kept brushing it off. it’ll go away. you, of course, had kept this from kian. you felt that him knowing wouldn’t do him any good. putting others first had always been a natural instinct of yours. it had been especially bad that morning. on the verge of a full breakdown, that was ignored, you had gotten ready as usual. waitressing at a cafe down the street had been a side job of yours for a few years, never getting tired of the homely, welcoming space you felt safe in.

as soon as you stepped through the door, the small bell signalling your awaited arrival, you felt all eyes on you. casuals greeted you with a smile whereas others took a quick glance in your direction, completely uninterested. you still couldn’t help but feel on-the-spot. you went about your shift as normally as possible, taking orders and greeting customers. the welcoming atmosphere had changed into something that made you uncomfortable. you felt that peoples smiles and happy attitudes towards you were not genuine. running away and finding somewhere to hide was a very seemingly ideal option for you.

nearing the end of your shift you found yourself in the alley beside the cafe, phone in hand, pacing. the number at the top read ‘ki’. you pressed it, yearning to hear his voice. after a few rings he picked up. “hey baaaaaby” kian said, giddy about you calling him during your shift. “hi ki” you said casually, trying to rid your voice of the nerves that filled you. “hey, are you alright?” he asked you softly. “mhm” was all you had found yourself being able to say, suddenly feeling choked up by that one question. “y/n..what’s wrong?” he had suspected for awhile that you hadn’t been feeling your best, but with your skills of hiding your emotions, he couldn’t be sure. the concern and care his voice had almost made you burst into tears then and there, standing in the middle of the cafe’s change rooms, a dirty cloth in hand. “..nothing-uh..nothing. i’m fine. just wanted to..say hi.” you forced out, voice heavy. “y/n…” “oh shit, my boss is calling me back to work. bye kian.” you rushed, voice shaky, “y/n, isn’t your shift about to en-” you hung up amidst his questioning. what is wrong with me. you scolded yourself, feeling embarrassed.

you decided a stroll would be good for you. you clocked out a bit early, your boss urging you to once seeing the flustered state you were in. instead of hearing straight home, you ended up finding yourself on a boardwalk that reached out into a vast lake. you wanted to go there to think but your mine seemed blank. you were upset and tired, but no tears came. you sat there, time ticking by, phone occasionally lighting up with calls and texts. you found it hard to find the motivation to actually get up and go. you’re mind was someplace else. the buzzing of your phone caught you off guard. your mind finally becoming more aware. you didn’t check who was calling you, just lazily answering. “y/n?” kian’s voice cracked out of the speaker. ”hello?” you said in a small voice. “y/n!” he sighed out of relief, “are you okay? where are you?” he rushed out, in a panic. you were a bit confused as to why he was so worried. “why? did something happen?” “what! y/n, no one knew where you were for two hours!” he sounded worn out, frustrated and confused. two hours? you could tell he was pacing as he spoke. “oh” you replied. he picked up on the distant vibe that came from each reply. you sounded drained. “y/n..” “i’ll be home in 5 minutes.” you hung up the call.

walking up towards the door, you were fiddling with your keys, getting ready to let yourself in. before you could even get to the unlocking part, the door flung open, a warm body enveloping you in their arms. kian’s cologne filled your nose, his taller figure making you feel safe. you could hear his heart beating rapidly. your tense body suddenly weakened. you felt like you’d reached your tipping point. all the silent, hidden struggling weighed down on you. unable to hold yourself up anymore, you collapsed into kian’s hold. he gripped you tight, making sure you wouldn’t fall. he slowly brought you both down towards the floor, seating himself against the wall beside the door, leaning you up against himself. jc, oscar, crawford, ryan and will were inside. they had obviously been called over when kian was freaking out. they were watching in deep concern, also being some of the many who had been trying to contact you. they had not known the extent of your struggling. seeing you in that way shocked them. they worriedly mumbled to each other whilst walking away, deciding to give the two of you privacy.

his hands brushed against your back soothingly as your body shook with each silent sob. tears rushed down your face. “shh..it’s okay y/n,” he said softly in your ear, “you’re fine, y/n, i’m here.” you felt so, so tired. once your body had stopped trembling, kian lifted your head up, holding your face between his hands. tears still rapidly ran down your cheeks. the sight of this made his heart wrench. he attempted to dry the wetness of your face with his sleeve but it was a futile attempt. he whispered “why didn’t you say anything y/n..” you stayed silent. “you don’t need to be scared to tell someone that you’re not feeling okay.” he was right. you were scared. that was not something you wanted to admit. the look on your face said it all. he pulled you into a hug, holding your head against his chest. your body slowly became more tired, weakened from your previous display of emotions. he stood up, still grasping on tightly to you. he walked you both towards his room, you leaning against his side for support, red eyed with pink blotchy cheeks. the sound of the door closing alerted the boys. they looked at you, eyebrows furrowed in worry. you didn’t look at them, deeply embarrassed. they looked at kian, silently asking if talking to you in that moment would be a good idea. kian shook his head. the boys silently mimicked that they were leaving, ryan mouthing ‘text us later’.

you both lay in kian’s bed, his hand running through your hair. “y/n?” “hmm?” you hummed quietly, exhausted. “from now on, i need you to tell me when your not feeling okay, even if you’re feeling the tiniest bit off. i don’t want you to keep struggling by yourself. i’m here for you and i want you to feel like you can tell me anything.” kian said. “i love you ki” you whispered, lifting your head up to look at him. the care he had for you was evident in his eyes. “i love you y/n”.

[saltwatersweetner]

Forever and Ever and Ever

Armin x Reader

You were a lost cause way before you even knew.

CW: Manipulative Behaviors, Cheating, Lying, mild strangulation, Gaslighting, love bombing, obsession, minor violence, reader is the work of year's of manipulation.

In all honesty, you liked the attention at first.

To have someone so wholly and devoted to you was amazing. Never having to question his whereabouts or do all the other things your friends had complained to you about was like a dream.

Until Annie came along and suddenly; it was like you didn’t matter anymore.

It's not that you didn’t trust Armin, you trusted him so much. You knew he wouldn’t intentionally hurt you right? At least you thought he wouldn’t—but you also weren’t blind to the way they acted with each other—like two long-lost lovers.

Like now.

You were supposed to be hanging out but he’d arrived late, the remnants of laughter painting his lips and red-tinged cheeks.

It almost felt like he was mocking you.

“Sorry I’m late Annie needed— wait where are you going?”

You didn’t even let him get a word out before you were walking away. You honestly wanted to be as far away from him as possible you felt...unstable almost.

Like you couldn't breathe; like you were close to screaming and tearing your hair out.

“We were supposed to meet at 12 o’clock, the movie started at 12:45; it is 4:16.” Breathing through your nose you yank your arm from his grip and continue walking.

Of course, he runs after you, not seeming to quite grasp how you were actually feeling.

He manages to grab your arm again completely stopping you in your tracks. He didn’t look it but Armin was strong as shit.

“H-Hey im sorry Annie needed my help with something and I lost track of time I didn’t mean to—“

Yanking your arm from his hold you give him the meanest look you could muster. You could tell the look on your face surprised him because you’d never looked at him like that before with so much malice and contempt.

“It doesn’t matter what you meant you stood your girlfriend up for 4 hours.”

Armin huffs and tries to grab you again but you evade his grasp “You just want me to abandon my friends when they need help?”

You felt violent.

You never felt…violent; towards your boyfriend before.

There surely must be something wrong with you to want to hurt him in such a way, to make him feel the way you did…but you didn't find it in yourself to care.

“No, but as your partner I expect a lot more communication than a on my way text! Do you know how embarrassing it was to stand here without any clue as to if you were coming?”

You had no regard for the other stragglers around at this hour who were just a little invested in the drama goin on on this side of the sidewalk. Armin however did care expressed by the way his neck and ears were turning a bright red. He puts his hands on your shoulders to keep you in place, distress, and embarrassment painting his features.

“You’re making a scene, lets's talk about this at your place.”

Objectively his place was closer and you both knew this. That's what puts all the clues you didn't want to see together and confirms at least one suspicion.

Laughing you can only shake your head as hysteria starts to set in “She’s in your dorm isn’t she that's why you want to go to mine.”

You were on the verge of a mental breakdown. Your emotions just felt everywhere and you couldn’t even think of how to get your thoughts back in order.

Why did you feel like this? How could Armin of all people make you feel like this?

“No your dorm is just closer.” He says it so confidently that you were almost inclined to believe him if you didn't already know that he was full of shit.

Something like a bell goes off in your head.

Pushing him away, you can't help but laugh “No my dorm is a 10-minute walk from here your dorm is around the corner.”

Armin's eyes search yours almost calculating something before nodding faintly “….yeah she's in my dorm.”

Sadness is a secondary emotion.

Anger takes hold much quicker...and then you just feel empty.

“So is it fun fucking her while your girlfriend is waiting for you?” Your voice is so quiet that if he wasn't so close to you he wouldn't have barely been able to hear you.

Armin looks panicked again but also almost, relieved? The expression is gone from his face before you can even take actual note of it.

“We’re not fucking, she just needed my help. I would never do that to you." Armin's hands find your face trying to convey his words "I love you so much, I wouldn't ever think of doing something like that. You know me (Y/N).”

Your jaw ticks under his warm palm “Do I?”

The violent urge had subsided by this point but you were nowhere near a forgiving mood. You didn't like being angry, much less being angry at someone you loved.

“You do." His thumbs rub pseudo soothing motions into our skin and you almost felt the urge to lean into him. You brain was playing tricks on you "You're the love of my life, my future, my everything. I would never think of cheating on you, you have to trust me its nothing going on between us.”

He punctuates each word with unwavering eye contact that makes your anger start to waver but you stay strong.

“I don’t believe you.”

You wanted to, you really, really; wanted to but something inside of you refused to let him sweet talk his way back into your good graces.

“Then I’ll spend all the time I need to convince you—starting now, let's go get dinner I wasted enough of your time today.”

You let him pull you into a hug that almost made you relax if you weren’t so pissed off. You didn't believe him but what other choice did you have? He was being so sincere and apologetic it was almost too tempting to believe him.

Armin does make it up to you however, and many times over almost to the point where he was back to normal after letting Annie steal all his time from you. It was almost like falling back into routine living in pure relationship bliss.

But sometimes—just sometimes when he came to see you. You could just barely smell a hint of a perfume clinging to his skin.

You trusted Armin, you did; and you couldn’t even find evidence that he was lying about not cheating on you. So why couldn't you let it go?

Why were you obsessing over this?

Were you just being crazy?

“Girl I hate the stressed look on your face, just confront him.”

Biting your thumbnail you keep your eyes locked on Armin’s back. He was sitting around with his friends no more than 600 feet from you and as far as you could tell unaware of your presence which at this moment in time you preferred considering he would probably coerce you into sitting with him.

“I tried that I need actual proof.”

Your best friend gives you a look filled with pity that you ignore completely. You’d rather die than continue with your accusations without knowing if you were just filled with paranoia and insecurity.

Turning away from them you pull out your phone and send a precautionary text to Armin which is replied to almost immedietly. The fact he was replying like nothing was wrong made you almost feel guilty for borderline stalking him.

Your best friend's voice breaks your train of thought “She’s laying her head on his shoulder.”

Waving her off you plan out another text to test if he would start lying about anything. You just wanted to catch him doing something, anything, really. “Mikasa does that.”

She tries again “They're holding hands?”

Hitting send you almost feel irritated at her voice “Mikasa does that too.”

You wished she would give you something with substance something that finally proved you right.

To make you stop feeling so fucking obsessed.

”Well damn do Mikasa kiss your boyfriend on the mouth too??”

Your head whips up at breakneck speed and you’re gifted to the sight of Armin giving Annie one of the softest kisses you’d ever witnessed. He only kissed you like that when he was feeling particularly sweet.

Armin lied?

Honestly you almost expected it, no boy could ever be so perfect.

A terrifying numbness takes hold of your heart.

Your phone finally buzzes with a response but you ignore it in favor of gathering your things “Let's go.”

Your best friend looks worried and unsure. Even she hadn't expected this outcome either “You’re not gonna confront him?”

Slipping your phone into your pocket you shake your head. You felt like your entire world was silently imploding “And get embarrassed? No thanks.”

“You ok pumpkin?”

You could only shrug in response, you didn’t have a real answer for her and you weren’t gonna hurt yourself trying to find one.

Silently parting ways with your friend you head back to your dorm and pack anything of his that you could find into a bag. You wanted every trace of him scrubbed from your room.

You wanted him to stop existing.

Your minds a blur as you somehow materialize into his dorm building. The plan was to get in and get out and hopefully not cry and make a bigger fool of yourself.

The second you appear on his floor you're greeted by Jean who seemed to be on his way somewhere but immediately changes his mind the moment his eyes land on you.

“Oh (Y/N) whats up! Armin's not home right now so—“

Connie, who was in his room jumps up and pokes his head out the door once he heard your name; trying and failing to look inconspicuous behind his tall friend.

You don't question their nervousness because of course they would know anything that had to do with the whole thing; they were his friends after all.

“You can stop covering for him I already know now move so I can give him his shit and be done with it.” Narrowing your eyes you try to go around him but he blocks your way.

"Move."

When Jean doesn’t move but starts to look apologetic you get mad enough to shove him completely out of your way sending him tumbling to the ground.

Connie jumps having watched the whole exchange with wide eyes “Oh my god Jean are you ok?!”

Swinging Armin's door open has Annie jumping out of his lap in surprise. Armin's staring at you like a deer in headlights and can't even bother to get a word out before you’re throwing the bag filled with his things onto his floor.

“Fuck both of yall.”

You’re barely out the door before he’s following after you calling your name along the way. He doesn't even have the nerve to look shameful as he buttons his pants along the way.

You originally planned to take the elevator back down but with him following after you the stairs were your best bet.

Armin latches on to your wrist before you can make it through the doorway. Once again you’re reminded just how physically strong he actually was as he pulls you firm against his chest.

“Armin let me go.”

Armins grip only tightens the more you struggle against him, his arms were practically an iron cage at this point and the longer time went on his hold on you turned almost painful.

“No, not until we talk about this.”

Still squirming in his arms you huffed in almost defeat “There's nothing to talk about, I don’t want anything else to do with you!”

If you could see his face you’d have watched the mild panic drop into something a little more sinister.

“So you wanna break up with me?”

You strangely feel conflicted at his question but you still find it in you to answer "...yes.”

“Why.”

You turn your head to try and catch a glimpse of his face “Are you serious?!”

He seriously had to be fucking with you it's the only thing that made sense.

“We can work through this it was a mistake—“

Trying to kick him you huff when the hit doesn't land “You don't mistakenly cheat on somebody!”

“You’re making a scene we can talk about this in my room.”

Technically the scene was made as soon as you sent all 6’1 of Jean Kirstein flying down the hall but, details.

“No im not going anywhere with you especially not in the room you fucked your little girlfriend in!” Kicking your feet out your thrashing is only temporarily quelled by Armin pressing you against the wall.

“I didnt fuck her!”

Stomping your foot you just narrowly miss his foot “Bull. Shit.”

You had never been so angry at him before, he’d never done something to hurt you before so you weren’t even sure how to emotionally react.

Your emotions were just...everywhere.

It was almost unhealthy.

“We almost did and its no excuse for it—“

Kicking the wall you almost manage to knock him back “Then why would you kiss her?! I saw you, you little fucking liar; you kissed her in front of everybody do you know how embarrassing that is—why are you crying?!”

Armin's tears were landing on your shoulder in burning hot trails. “You cant leave me you cant.”

Groaning you try once again to force your way out of his grip; to the same result. Meanwhile, Arkin continues his monologue.

“You’re the best thing thats ever happened to me you’re right im fucking terrible but you have to give me another chance I can fix this.”

Armin's grip tightens significantly at that.

It was so tight in fact that it was starting to cut into your oxygen. Patting his arm in a panic you shift in his grip only making it worse.

“Armin—Armin that hurts let go—“

Your ribcage felt like it would snap at any moment. Like one wrong move would kill you.

“No, im not letting go until we fix this.”

He squeezes tighter not giving you any other option. Your heart was pounding wilding in your ribcage with a mixture of lack of oxygen and fear.

“Armin im—cant breath pleas—I cant—“

If you could see his face you’d know just how unhinged he truly looked. “Not until you hear me out, I’ll let you pass out if I have to.”

Black spots were starting to cloud your eyesight and in pure desperation, you managed to croak “ok…talk.”

Armin lets you drop just barely managing to catch you before you fell. You were beyond dizzy and while you struggled to catch your breath Armin lifts you into his arms and robs your back in an attempt at being soothing.

“It's ok my love breathe we can work through this together.”

Weakly pushing at his shoulders you try to get out of his arms but can't. Your energy felt strangely zapped and you quickly give up on trying to get him off of you. With all the fight drained out of you all that was left was how hurt you truly felt.

You couldn’t believe that this was the boy you loved. That he could manage to rip your heart out in such a way.

“I hate you so much, why would you do that to me?”

Dropping your head onto his shoulder all you could do was cry while Armin took you back to his room.

“You don’t really hate me; you’re just upset right now, it's ok we’ll work it out.”

While you two had your scene down the hall Annie had been putting her clothes on at the behest of Jean who was still bright red from embarrassment. He hadn’t expected you to be able to basically fling him down the hall considering the huge height gap.

Did he kind of deserve it? Yes. Would he admit it? No.

The blonde girl after dressing herself quite literally refused to leave as now she had a bone to pick with Armin.

When he comes down the hall Annie felt a shiver roll down her spine. Something about him was fundamentally—wrong.

He wasn’t looking at her with those sparkly eyes anymore and if she knew any better she’d see that he looked downright disgusted with her.

Ignoring him she immediately sets her sights on you “(Y/N) I swear I didn’t—”

Armin cuts her off “Please leave she doesn’t want to talk to you.”

Annie blinks back in shock not expecting Armin to interject so rudely “Im not talking to you—I know it doesn’t fix anything but I’m really sorry.”

You don't even turn your head to address her eyes shut firmly and pressed into Armin’s shoulder “Are you really?”

“W-what?”

You weren’t stupid enough to think she didn't know you two were together—everyone knew you were together. Where one went surely the other followed.

And you really weren’t mad at her…maybe a little bit…but you didn’t blame her. She owed you…nothing.

It was Armin who betrayed you after all.

And now you were crying again.

Annie nearly flinches backwards at the animosity that seemed to pour out of Armin now. He was angry at her like it was solely her fault for your tears.

“We don’t forgive you, do we?”

The use of we is manipulative, strictly there to put you on the spot and to give a false sense of comrades. He wanted you to feel like this was only between you two, like Annie was the enemy.

You knew what he was doing.

When you don’t answer his soothing hands turn slightly violent on your skin, you knew his grip would leave dark bruises in the morning. To everyone else it looked like he simply adjusted his grip but you knew better.

Armins voice is tight and threatening “Do we, (Y/N)?”

Annie watches confused as you practically lock up and then shake your head slowly. She couldn’t explain it but all of a sudden she was very deeply afraid. Her stomach turned with an unknown sickness and finally listening to her instincts gets the hell out of there, but not before spitting out;

“You’re fucking weird!’

Armin hums somewhere back in his throat and takes you into his room without speaking a word to Jean or Connie all his attention seemingly attached to you. In reality, he was thinking of every way you’d try to break up in the coming days and every way he could stop that from happening.

“Its ok baby we’ll get through this together, it’ll be like it never happened, like she never existed.”

You somehow felt like he had a double meaning there, a sinister one. It's emphasized by the way Armin tilts your head back forcing eye contact. He’s cradling your face like you're the most precious thing ever; he’s beautiful like this, so soft and doting. 

But Lucifer was also beautiful.

“ You want to forget about her right? All you have to do is tell me so and she’s gone for good.”

He runs a thumb over your lip sending a tingle down your spine. He seemed almost mesmerized by your mouth. Like he wanted to devour you from the inside out.

You don't know why you were allowing him so much of you at the moment. You should be disgusted by his hands roaming your body so quickly but you felt strangely, relieved?

“Armin...”

He surges forward before you can get the thought out and latches his lips to yours. He invaded every one of your senses forcing you to feel nothing but him, like the true dictator he was.

It was messing with your head.

As much as you didn't want to admit it Armin was the air in your lungs, you couldn't breathe without him, and you couldn't sleep. It was sick but it was true. You'd been together for year's, he was the only solid thing to ever grace your life.

But, he finally hurt you.

Even in this moment, where your guard was considerably lower; the betrayal still felt almost like a fever. Like something you could never be prepared enough for. It felt like he’d personally carved out your heart. 

And as greedy as he was; here he was once again demanding it.

That was something you would not be able to live through a second time.

Pulling away you put a hand on his face to stop him from chasing your lips “If you do that. If you hurt me like that again...I’m really leaving, I promise you.”

And you were serious.

Your heart wasn’t fragile by no means but who wanted to be cheated on? You’d already look dumb taking him back now and if it were to ever happen again you couldn’t bare the shame that would bring.

“You would leave me?”

Armin’s stare is cold and calculated. A look you only ever saw when you'd made him unreasonably angry. It was rare but familiar.

You nod without fear “without a word.”

“Leave me?” Armin laughs under his breathe and that look is in his eyes again as he forces your back into the bed. He makes a show of climbing over you; imposing his body weight onto yours, stealing the few bits of oxygen he so graciously gifted you. “That’s funny that you think you even have a choice.”

“Try to leave me if you want, you'll hate every moment of it. I'm welded into your bones you cant tell where I end and you start and you want to leave me?” he laughs again truly amused at your boldness while his hands explore your body is warm waves.

“You’re mine forever do you understand? I own every inch of this body. Death couldn’t even keep me from you.”

You stare at him incredulously, almost wanting to feel shocked at his declaration “Armin I’m serious.”

“So am I,” He forces your legs open and makes himself comfortable between them “You may not realize it yet but you need me. You need me so much it hurts but its ok i’ll make sure you never forget.”

And he did.

And just like he told you, every waking moment afterward was spent pressed to his side. You truly didn't know where one began and the other ended. You didn't even have time for anyone but him nowadays so that was ok too.

Armin was all you needed right?

You were his and his alone after all.

[kittydemon9000]

SO MERLOPIAN KAI PART 2 ELECTRIC BOOGALOO

So, with Kalmaar, he ofc immediately goes to his parents about his feeling, slightly placing his revenge on hold. They are...dubious about it, but Maya raises the point of how there has never been a human/merlopian hybrid before, and from what Ray has told them about having two EM parents it’s possible for Kai to have some water abilities himself, which could be what gave Kalmaar his feeling. So, they agree to look into it.

Moving on..... Uh. Kai doesn’t have a fun time in S6, as briefly as he’s there. You see, Nahdakahn knows exactly what buttons to press and is able to get Kai into a panicked state where he, on the verge of a panic attack and mental breakdown, just says “I wish that I could just be normal! I wish I could just go home! I wish I could be with dad and mom and father and Kal and Bentho and Nya!!!”

The “normal” comment comes from how they weren’t able to completely hide Kai’s heritage since yeah, there were other people on the boat who saw him. That and he also tried a lot less to keep it hidden. And because some humans are assholes, he has to deal with that.

So ofc, Nahdakahn interprets it in the worst ways and as two wishes. Kai is now a full human yes….but was also sent to where the fish fam currently were……which just so happened to be at the bottom of the ocean.

So yeah, double trauma for both groups. Kai got to experience what drowning felt like, and his fam was essentially forced to watch him die since there was nothing they could do. They were too far under to take him to the surface and too far from the palace to take him there.

But dw, it gets even worse.

You see, the whole reason Nahdakahn is being this malicious about Kai’s wishes is because he learned that Kai was the reason the Preeminent was destroyed, thereby destroying Djinjago.

Nahdakahn is then able to do a “oh? Is this not what you wanted? I thought you wished to be normal.” Which ofc sounds really bad since it’s in front of his family. “But, I understand. You grow tired of the stares in the street, how they whisper behind you back about what you are. Not human, not merlopian, not normal. Just a freak masquerading as one of them.”

This ofc supremely pisses off the fam. Like, weapons drawn ready to commit murder.

But then Nahdakahn stop them with a “ah ah ah, I wouldn’t do that if I were you. After all, I am the only way your son has a chance at living. So go ahead. Make a wish.”

Trimaar ends up being the one to do it, and is smart enough to know this uh will twist it in anyway he can so says. “I wish for Kai to be sent safely to the surface without harm done upon him.”

Blah blah blah, your wish is yours to keep, Trimaar realizing “wait there’s a lot that could be interpreted” but too late BAM now Kai’s kinda stuck on the Misfortune’s Keep.

And he....generally has a pretty bad time. Think Jay but this time it’s personal.

However, Kai’s appearance had Trimaar get the Merlopian army and start heading to the surface. The remaining ninja have a brief moment of “are you kidding me two enemies at once” before learning that this is Kai’s lost family and they’re here to help.

So now the ninja have a whole ass fish army to help them, plus a very protective, very angry fish family.

But for the rest of canon, the only difference is that when they’re leaving Tiger Widow Island, Nya gets snatched along with Jay(who was taken because he hadn’t used his wish yet) and they aren’t stuck on the island, and then later that Kai gets sucked into the sword when the ninja launch their rescue mission.

But yeah, it gets all Un-Happened by Jay’s wish(which at seeing Kai physically hurt and being emotionally torn apart at his baby sister dying, wished that none of this ever happened and that Nahdakahn was never found), only like canon Nya and Jay still remember what happens.

Nya is now firmly on team Kai Is Alive and tells her parents everything about what happened and the wish Jay made, and more importantly where Kai is.

Unfortunately, they need to take some time and prepare. Trimaar and Maya have been doing their best over the years to open the populace possibly making bonds with the humans, but now it’s finally happening. They can’t just go up there out of no where, since from what Nya has told them 1) most humans don’t even know they exist and 2) in the past few years they have been subject of many attacks, mostly from non-humans, so they need to make sure the humans understand they don’t mean any harm.

So DotD happens, then the beginnings of S7 :)

Right out, Kai never liked the museum curator. Up to that point he’d only ever caught fleeting glimpse of him but something about him Kai just despised. As a result, he also visited the museum as scarcely as possible, and thus didn’t notice a very interesting painting containing a two very strange figures.

When he learns his name was Dr.Saunders.....things don’t go well.

It happened when Kai brought the helmet with his dad’s symbol on it. As much as he disliked the curator, he was the most likely to be able to recognize what kind of helmet it was.

Then in his anger he gets himself captured.

He’s taken to a special cell lined with vengestone and has guards around the clock, and Krux takes extra care to make sure Kai doesn’t know where Ray is.

ofc it’s around this time that the Merlopians arrive and express their wishes for a possible alliance between their two races. Unfortunately they showed up at literally the worst time, and double unfortunately the people in charge of diplomacy decide to bring some of the ninja in as an extra precaution because of the villains have been running around.

So the people who join the meeting are Lloyd and Jay from the ninja(they would’ve brought Kai but he hasn’t returned from his missions yet and isn’t answering their calls) as well as some police officers and from the Merlopians is the whole royal family plus a few guards.

Both Jay and Nya have a silent moment of staring at each other since “I know and I’m not sure you know but I think you know but I don’t want to say anything since you might not”

And just as they’re about to start, The Time Twins attack. Because why the hell not.

They’re actually able to hold them off for a while, but unfortunately there are too many Vermillion. Then Kalmaar whips out his Water Powers which causes him to get kidnapped since they need both Fire and Water masters for the blade.

While they’re recovering, Lloyd then gets a panicked call from Zane saying that he checked the museum footage and Kai has been captured. The gets overheard by the royal family, and then Lloyd asks why they looked so upset at which they learn(sans Jay since wish) that Kai is royalty. The eldest son actually, and thus first in line for the throne, as well as being presumed dead for the past five years.

So basically Krux has kidnapped the King and Queen’s husband, the crown prince, and the second in line prince(if anyone knows a more fancy term for this please let me know)

Maya, Trimaar, Nya and Benthomaar are not happy. Not with the Ninjagian people, no they’re fine, but they’re bout ready to murder Krux, and they don’t even know about Ray yet.

So they offer any help they can.

Zap back to how Kai and Kalmaar are doing.

Kalmaar is….kind feral tbh. Like, he’s biting, clawing, trying to strangle them with his tentacles, and before they got vengestone cuffs on him was trying very hard to drown anyone.

Ofc, this does little to the Vermillion and soon Kalmaar finds himself in the cell right next to Kai’s. He’s overjoyed to see his brother again, albeit upset that this is why.

They both reluctantly come to the conclusion that there isn’t much they can do at the moment, and there are many Vermillion guards right outside their cells, so they decide to start catching up.

And for pretty much the rest of the season canon is pretty much the same, just shuffle around the characters a bit and add a protective Fish Fam. 

Though their little trip back in time is quite sight for the Past EMs, especially because of how Kalmaar is using his powers, which leaves Kai mostly stuck in his Fish Form. This time they don’t even bother trying to explain, just give instructions on how to defeat the Vermillion and jumping into the battle. 

And I mean just imagine that from the EMs perspective. An enemy you thought you defeated just returned with a giant metal creature and an army of snake things that don’t look like any kind of Serpentine they’d ever seen. Then a shark person and squid person??? show up and not only do they know how to fight the snake things but they also seem to be Elemental Masters???? Despite the fact Ray is very much alive and they didn’t even know there was a Water EM. Then the two not only summon dragons but they also fuse their dragons into an even bigger one with two heads.

And then all of them disappear into the sky without a trace.

W i l d

But yeah, after that it calms down quite a bit. Kai spends the time skip before S8 reconnecting with his family and his dad, and through some tech courtesy of Borg they're able to bring Ray with them :D

And Kai actually goes to meet the Jade Royal Family since y’know. He’s the crown prince. He’s kinda important and legitimately forgot about it. Luckily Kalmaar is able to help coach Kai through it, but is also a bit smug about how he finally has something to teach to his older brother. Kai was actually the one who suggested asking the ninja for help protecting the mask.....but we know how that inevitably ends.

Bentho, Kal and Nya were actually on the ship for this particular adventure, and then Nya and Bentho were dragged along when they got sent to the First Realm. Bentho, despite being the youngest sibling and to the surprise of literally everyone, was actually really good with kids and spent the most time with Little Wu, right behind Cole.

But yeah S9......Nya and Bentho have a really bad time in the First Realm beause of the heat, but at least they don’t get captured. Kai on the other hand....

Yeah at some point he gets accidentally splashed with water and well.....it definitely doesn’t help with the Oni accusations. The Dragon Hunters decide to burn him along with the Wind Dragon, which moves up their Build Our Own Dragon time table.

After they escape Faith is actually pretty chill about the whole fish thing, but she does ask a lot of questions. 

And then S10..... kinda the same. They end up dropping off as many people as they can with the Merlopians since the smoke can’t reach them.

I might make a Part 3 for the rest of the seasons, but yeah. this is where we’re at.

[cherry-pop-soda]

I know nobody asked but since i’m now officially an upperclassmen (with a wonderful set of undiagnosed mental health issues and neurodivergency, might I add) here’s my tips on how to vibe through the school year (or, at least things that really help me vibe through the school year)

those popular kids who have everyone convinced they’re hot shit? They genuinely aren’t. as a junior I can tell you it’s anarchy after freshman year bc nobody gives much of a shit about popularity anymore. Those popular kids just haven’t had middle school wear off yet. This doesn’t mean some people still won’t be cliquish, they will be, but it’s less common after freshman year. But keep in mind, if someone is cliquish and judgy to you, they probably weren’t worth your time anyways.

you don’t have to fit in. I KNOW it’s so fucking cliche but you seriously don’t have to. You are not less than anybody else just bc they have a shitton of friends they barely know or are rich or anything like that. You are not less than anyone else period. And those people who act like they’re so cool really probably don’t think they actually are that cool. that’s why they try to maintain a high social status.

Your self worth has nothing to do with what other people think of you. If someone is going to judge you for everything you do they aren’t worth your energy anyways. As long as you’re happy being you, that’s what’s important. You should NEVER feel ashamed of being yourself. you do not have to change who you are to be important to this world as a whole.

this is specifically for group projects when you don’t know anyone in the class (I really really needed to hear this as a freshman): just straight up ask people. I know it can be hard but chances are nobody is going to be like “ew no” or something shitty like that. The worst case scenario is really that their group is full so they have to decline in which case you ask other people. And if somebody really IS like “ew no” I would bet money that they would be a horrible person to be in a group with anyways. It’s just weeding out the trash. And honestly, everybody usually just wants to get the assignment done so they don’t have to do it later so they won’t mind you being there.

for homework: USE TIMERS!!!!! THIS SAVED ME!!! Estimate how much time it’ll take you to do something, set up a timer, get some music playing if that helps you, and hit start. Then just work on the assignment until your timer rings. If you need more time set another timer!! And set your phone in a place where you won’t look at it! with the timer going, you’ll feel the urge to try to get the work done before the timer goes off, kind of like when you’re trying to finish work really quickly before the end of class so it doesn’t end up as homework!! It makes work go SO much quicker and it makes it much easier to focus.

for when you have homework in a bunch of classes: make a priority system. I’ll give mine as an example. I do homework in order of when it’s due. If I have an assignment due tomorrow and another due in three days, I do the one that’s due tomorrow first so if I get tired and can’t finish the rest I still have time and don’t have to force myself to do extra work while being super uncomfy. And then if stuff is due at the same time, do the shortest things first. Long assignments are much more tiring, so then when you finish them it’s hard to have energy left to do the other stuff. But if you knock out the short assignments first, it gets you in the roll of doing your homework and is still less tiring.

If you get tired, stop. I’m not kidding at all. If you have some assignment that’s just a ton of work, see how much you can get done, but if you get tired, take a rest and either work on something else or be done. I know that it seems counterintuitive but you can get way more work done when you aren’t on the verge of a breakdown.

pretend. your life. is a movie. this is general life advice honestly but this vastly improved my mental well-being. pretend your life is an indie coming of age movie and you’re the one that’s coming of age. keep in mind that you get to pick the soundtrack!! something’s bothering you? that’s part of the plot and working through it is just part of your growth as a character. That doesn’t mean you aren’t allowed to be upset about it, it just serves to remind you that it will pass and as you fight through it you��re growing as a person. romanticize everything that makes you happy (so long as it is appropriate to do so and doesn’t hurt anybody else or you). Driving down the street listening to your favorite band?? romanticize that. Studying late into the night? romanticize that. it makes everything a little bit brighter and it’s really nice

remember: you are still growing and developing and learning about life. You are still trying to find where you belong in the world and grow into yourself and learn how to feel comfortable in your own skin. You are still trying to understand who you are and who you want to be. You are learning what it means to be YOU, and you are learning how to stop being ashamed of that. And all of that is a process that takes time. Do it at your own pace.

[galactic-magick]

Something New: Jimmy Woo x Reader

Summary: You become pretty fond of the cute FBI agent that comes to your coffee shop every morning.

Words: 900+

Warnings: none, maybe spoilers for episode 6 and 7 if you squint (it’s only mentioned in subtext)

Author’s Notes: I don’t think I’ve ever written an actual coffee shop AU before lol, but I had to write this idea with Jimmy, he’s one of my faves hehe

Taglist: @banner-swift​

-

-

-

You can’t help but wonder who this mysterious man is, always coming in at the same time every morning, ordering the same three coffees, and wearing an FBI jacket.

Even when you’re not working at the counter, you’re usually hanging out somewhere in the coffee shop, doing whatever you need to on your laptop in the calming environment. Since he’s come here every day for the past couple weeks, he knows you by name and always waves to you as he heads out wherever you are. It almost feels like you have an unspoken friendship, despite not exchanging any words besides “hellos” and “how are yous.”

You always look forward to seeing his handsome face, even though you know you’ll probably never know him any deeper. He seems like a nice guy, and you suppose the three coffees he always orders are for friends or family.

“Jimmy! Hey!” you greet him as he walks up to the register. “The usual, I assume?”

“Yes, thank you,” he nods. “Actually, could I add another one to that?”

“Yeah, sure! What would you like?”

“Could you make me your favorite drink?”

“My favorite?” you question.

“Yeah, I’m feeling like I want to try something new,” he smiles. “It can be anything, be as creative as you want,”

“Alright!” you laugh, finishing punching in the numbers and sliding his credit card.

You turn around and get to it, the first three drinks you already know by heart. Then you start on your personal favorite, taking advantage of all the secret ingredients available to you. You’ve never asked exactly which of the three coffees is his, so you’re not sure what his personal taste in coffee is like, so you hope it’s not too disappointing.

Before you put it in the tray, you hesitate. You don’t want to overthink it, but did he ask for your personal favorite for a reason? Did he like you, maybe?

No, no, you can’t get caught up in daydream land again. He was probably just curious, wanted to be friendly.

But writing your number on the cup wouldn’t hurt, would it?

Before you can convince yourself out of it, you scribble it down. You double check that all the lids are secure and then hand him his order.

“Have a great day!” you say.

“You too!” he waves, going on his way.

 -

 The next morning, he doesn’t show up at his normal time.

Or any time, for that matter.

Was it you? Did you scare him away?

Did something come up? Should you be worried?

You try to ignore all the questions bouncing around your head while you work. You need to be focused, and other customers are still counting on you.

You’re halfway through making an iced mocha when your co-worker comes up to you, “Hey, where was that cute FBI guy today?”

You shrug, finishing pouring the drink and labeling it, “Not sure,”

“I heard there’s been some weird government agency stuff over near Eastview, maybe he’s involved with that,”

“I don’t know,” you shake your head, continuing to make drinks. “I barely know him,”

“Oh come on, I saw you write your number on his cup yesterday,”

“Shut up,”

“Hey, no need to get defensive, I was just wondering if you knew anything,” they laugh. “You better claim him quick though, or I might shoot my shot,”

They walk away and you roll your eyes.

Maybe he really is just on a top-secret dangerous case, or maybe he had to move somewhere else last minute. It’s not like you know anything about all these agencies, especially the ones involved with superheroes. He’s probably fine.

 -

 You have another shift later at night, the time of day where the shop is mostly full of college students on the verge of mental breakdowns. It’s pretty slow, as most people buy what they want and then sit down for a while until the shop closes.

You spend the free time cleaning up a bit early, so there’s less to do when you have to help close. You sweep the floors and wipe down all the counters, and start putting away the extra syrups and sauces.

“Y/N!”

You whip your head towards the familiar voice, coming from none other than Jimmy. He runs to the counter, completely out of breath.

“I wanted to get here before you closed,” he exhales. “Sorry I wasn’t here this morning, something happened at work, but I really wanted to see you, and I didn’t want you to think I was mad at you or anything,”

“Oh! Yeah, that’s okay,” you laugh nervously, realizing all the customers and your co-workers are watching you. “Um, do you still want your usual coffees?”

“No, no, my hearts beating too fast already, and I’d only need one now…” he trails off.

“Alright, that’s cool,” you sigh.

“Do you want to go somewhere?” he blurts. “Like, with me?”

“Really?”

“I would’ve called you before, but I…lost the cup,”

You laugh, “That’s fine. Although my shift still has 15 minutes-“

Your co-worker mouths a “we’ll cover for you,” and you nod in appreciation.

“Okay, yeah, let’s go,” you take off your apron and grab your things, following him outside.

You start just walking down the block with him, attempting to process what just happened.

“It was delicious, by the way,” Jimmy says.

“Hmm?”

“The drink you made me. I can see why it’s your favorite,”

“Thanks,” you chuckle.

“Sorry I’m not very good at this,” he ruffles his hair. “I did get across that I like you, right?”

“Barely, but yeah,” you laugh. “Hopefully I did too?”

“I think so,” he nods. “Is it too late for some dinner?”

You shrug, “I didn’t have time to grab some before my shift, so nah,”

“Great,” he smiles, holding out his hand. “Shall we?”

You take it with a grin, hoping tonight is the start of something new.

[youranxiousnerd]

Showtime Thoughts

bc i am in love with julia lester

spoilers below

First off, why is this episode so short?

ngl i forgot mazzara was a regular

ricky ded besties

awww nina and the letters 

she looks very good in her dress

ashlyn and ricky look so good

“We’re screwed!”

ash and ricky are too funny like where were they this season?

chaotic and pretty best friends

sidenote, why did they go see north high’s production? 

oh my god ricky and nina are talking

SEBLOS IN THE BACKGROUND

i am taking what i can get

RICKYS FACE WITH THE CARD!!!!!!!!

my favorite part of the episode

his makeup looks very good

he looks very good

as @organic-guacamole said, he is very pretty

its been like three minutes and it already is so chaotic

yessss kourtney’s mom!!!

so howie and kourt are fine? gah since when?

“look for the shortest fork” mood

I CANNOT TAKE EJ SERIOUSLY HE LOOKS LIKE AN ANGRY BIRD

big bird ej comin at you

oh

PORTWELL DATE

wait isnt this ejs last show? is he going to miss his last afterparty for a date?

true love bitches

GINA MY LOVE

“Is he with us?”

NORTH HIGH SET OUR BEST BOI ANTOINE ON FIRE APS GET READY

seb being a supportive boyfriend is everything i needed

jenny is frazzled

i love how all the techie turned actors are nervous at some point during the episode

REDLYN CONTENT

awww thats so cute love the callback!!!

ooo howie is here

love how the writers leave a cliffhanger and then close the book before it turns to tragedy with one line

mazzara and ej, thats it

jenn what

why is mike there?

that was so unnecessary like aren’t mike and jenn over?

LILY

“did we forget to build a moat around the school” 

let ricky be single challenge

she just said “lol” i cant

props to ricky for keeping calm during the show after he saw mike and jenn

ah so lily is a child of divorce?

“lily scram”

RICKY AFTER THE CURTAIN OPENS WHY IS THIS FUNNY

STOP MAZZARA IS THE VOICE OVER

HE SOUNDS REALLY GOOD

how did ricky do that so fast-

put on gloves over the cast, makeup, and a mask?

i dont work with costumes 

AMERICA EXPLAIN

The one scene we get from the show...

Yay Steph!!!!

“Big Red has not thrown up in twenty minutes” ashlyn’s little smile

“she heard wrong”

someone please explain how spotlighting the judge is a good idea it makes it seem like things went wrong

“Carlos is a seasoned professional” honey carlos is on the verge of a mental breakdown

“He says help

Communication

Seb translating for Carlos is beautiful dramatic, yes, but im right. 

im so proud of them. they go from not talking for a week to seb being able to tell how carlos is feeling based off a stoic expression.

SOULMATE SHIT

IM SORRY NO BOP TO THE TOP CALLBACK

LIKE NONE

WHO WANTS TO RIOT WITH ME?!?!

wait so carlos goes from on the verge of a mental breakdown to full on performing and speaking?!?!?!? Speaking well too, not stumbling.

he looks so comfortable on stage when not even ten minutes ago he looked like he was going to vomit?

h e l p

ashlyn’s little laugh!

NINI IS A FORK IM LAUGHING THIS IS GREAT

big red lookin’ at his girl

ricky what are you doing?

ASHLYN AND GINA

I QUIT THEY’RE ADORABLE

GET IT KOURTNEY

howie’s little mouth drop

i cant with sebs costume i should not be laughing how is he able to do a kick line

ASHLYN MY LOVE

be our guest was enjoyable. it had a lot of moving parts. frankie and dara sounded really good. it’ll probably grow on me the more i listen to it.

is it just me or did be our guest lack some energy?

NATIALIE IS SO AGGRESSIVE

awww gina bb

portwell!!

“my mom sent me jordan fisher”

big red and ricky!!!

...what is big red doing? has he been faking sick?

“PLEASE EVERYONE REMAIN IN THE SAME ROLE YOU STARTED IN” 

BEST LINE OF THE SEASON OMFG 

alright what the hell is up with howie?!?

kourtney is so excited and then downer howie comes to ruin it

nina just write “thanks for being the best bro and glad youre not dead”

btw kourtney and gina look really good in their costumes

ASHLYN!!!!

SHES SO PRETTY THANK YOU

redlyn!!

gina and jamie!!! 

he looks so proud

glad gina gets to see her family!

cute scene, jordan is a nice addition!

RICKY AND THE BOWL

julia lester is killing it with the vocals

big red is so in love

seb bouncing in the costume 

“she’s never looked at me that way before” evil smirk

PORTWELL GLANCES

my heart fricking stopped when carlos went on stage 

being early on your cue/missing is awful would highly not recommend

a bop to the top callback after this would have been perfect

those harmonies!!

THEYRE SO IN LOVE

ummm phone call?

CHIPS BIG SCENE

...why wasn’t seb cogsworth? 

alright that was really good. everyone (even the backup) sounded really good. portwell rights! ashlyn rights! kowie rights! acting rights! 

so mazzara and jamie?

Ashlyn is the perfect Belle fight me

“Eat it Zackey Roy!” how about “yay kiddos, nice job!”

ej’s little dance

“bc you’re ginas brother” 

he is enamored by her it is adorable

EJ CASWELL RIGHTS

“hey, jordan fisher, would you like to f up one of three stableish ships in hsmtmts?” “sure, im in!”

ej!!!

aww hopefully he doesnt take the conversation too heart. they both like each other so much.

Portwell is so enjoyable to watch.

return of the bro

ej go get your girl dont worry about her brother please

SOMEONE TOUCHED THE PROPS

all hands on deck

“Can you just jump off something high”

I seem to remember Ricky falling from something high last episode, is that correct? 

She tells this to one of her most UNSTABLE kids

Oh shit

Miss. Jenn

Wtf

like what the actually hell

look at the kids faces they’re heartbroken

Miss. Jenn why. You’re stressed about the show, but you’re not performing it. They are. They have to worry about lines and cues and pitches, not you. Miss. Jenn has literally gone at the kids this season. Opening night speech too Ash and Ricky, shutting Seb down, that comment. She has become obsessed with the Menkies and North High. It has gotten really bad. These kids have put everything into this show, even their relationships (both platonic and romantic) and that is how you repay them? 

I didn’t think they would address this, I lost hope after last week but I am so glad they’re going too.

Someone send Seb after Miss. Jenn please, let him rip into her, he would do very well.

Miss. Jenn is supposed to be the role model and she just told a kid to jump off something high.

nina has been a godsend this episode, props to her!

haven’t been the biggest nini fan this season (off and on for me), but she was very behaved this episode. 

if there is anything the east high kids are good at, it’s bullshitting their way out.

“aim for my face” character growth

I KNEW IT

LILY WHY HOW WHEN WHY 

WTF THEY END THERE I CANNOT WITH CLIFF HANGERS

I liked the episode. Didn’t love it, but liked it. I really wish we got to see more acting, like we didn’t even see Big Red and E.J go on stage. Not even the iconic yellow dress. Some of the drama is so unnecessary, like why Mike and Jenn? What is with the Kourtney and Howie drama the writers insist on having, can’t they just be happy?

Besides the whole harness incident (burn that harness and mask it is causing so many problems) the production went very well, too well. This is East High we’re talking about.

Promo thoughts because what

oo they’re sneaking, maybe Big Red’s thingy

YES ASHLYN GETTING THE LOVE SHE DESERVES

oo Kowie confession?

portwell please be okay

what is up with carlos’ hair?

so seb, miss. jenn, and carlos scene? this has the potential to be very beautiful.

“It’s not over” not this again... 

i’m thinking carlos and seb are going to talk to miss jenn.

Sidenote, if we do not get a good seblos scene I will riot.

Hopefully Miss. Jenn apologizes with a billion sorrys

rini you just broke up please dont get back together 

im scared

if it is a scene where they close the book i will be very happy

Are we getting a flash forward scene? I’m pretty sure Miss. Jenn said Menkies aren’t till two plus weeks after the show.

We know based off the promo pics Ej and Gina are at the cast party, what went wrong?

Wait do we not get to see the finale of the show?

We better see the goddamn transformation

how does lily home and core four song fit in? im more curious about the lily one.

In conclusion, I am not ready for this to be over and the transformation needs to be sent to hell.

[hoedorokishoto]

Trust - Part 5

Shoto Todoroki x Reader 

+ Minors DNI 

previous | part | next 

My lids felt heavy as I struggled to open my eyes to the bright room. The furniture in Hitoshi’s room becoming clear as my vision cleared, and I could take in all my surroundings. A very silent and stoic Mr Aizawa standing by the door, arms crossed, his face unreadable. I pulled the blankets up, becoming aware that I currently only had one of Hitoshi’s shirts on over my underwear. Something I was comfortable showing Hitoshi, but not so much the Erasure Hero.

“How are you feeling?” He asked, his voice deep and even though I knew he wasn’t accusing me of anything I still felt like I was in trouble. Guilt still seemed to be the only emotion I could manage.

“I feel fine. I didn’t have much to drink at all last night.” I answered, trying to laugh off his question.

“Even though I’m not thrilled about the underage drinking, I think you know that isn’t what I meant.”

I knew what he meant, my head dropping to my bare thighs where I fidgeted with the hem of the shirt. Memories of last night came flooding back and I couldn’t help but cringe at the feeling. The feeling of being overwhelmed with all those emotions, feeling things that I wasn’t meant to be feeling.

“I- um, I’ve got it under control now, I’m sorry about what happened last night. I should have um- I- It’s all my fault.” I barely got out before a tear ran down my face.

“Y/N. What happened wasn’t your fault, you and Sen are both almost adults and weren’t doing anything wrong. I think there was just too much alcohol and not enough communication which was the cause of the outburst. Don’t blame yourself for the actions of others.” Mr Aizawa said lowly, walking over and sitting on the desk chair across from me. Despite his gruff exterior, he was one of the most noble men you had ever met. Also, one of the best heroes.

“Um, did… Todoroki. Is he okay?” I asked, heat rising up my neck and making its way across my cheeks. My body betraying me and my intentions of trying to come across cool, calm and collected.

“He went to shower; he didn’t leave you at all last night. I’m sure it was quite cozy with all 3 of you in here last night.” Aizawa stated, standing, and making his way over to the door. He stayed? Why? What could Shoto Todoroki gain from laying on the ground like a dog and guarding me? Was he worried that I was going to have another meltdown and his ice would be able to help?

“Put on some pants, come downstairs. Everyone was worried about you, and they made breakfast.”

“I have to go finish some paperwork because Bakugo and Denki decided to defend you honour last night. Noble but stupid.”

My eyes widened; they really did that for me? I wanted to smile but thought it best to wait before the teacher was out of the room.

When the door clicked, I jumped up and found some spare clothes that I kept here. A pair of leggings that covered my bare thighs and a sweatshirt that added warmth to my cold body. I thought it best to have a quick look at my appearance before leaving the room and scaring any students. Knowing that sometimes my hair could be exceptionally large and in charge. Pleasantly surprised that someone, I would guess Hitoshi had taken off my makeup, and left a thick hair tie on the corner of the mirror, the tie perfect for restraining the small afro that had started to form on my head.

Before I could talk myself out of it, I left the room and headed to the direction of Todoroki’s dorm, wanting to thank him for all his help. My body moving before my mind could decide this might be the worst decision I had ever made.

                                                            *

The knock on the wooden door seemed to echo throughout the hall. The only noise in the empty hallway.

“It’s fine, just say thank you then leave.” I said to myself. Eyes closed and breathing in heavily. My anxiety through the roof. Caught between wanting to thank Todoroki for all his help but also never wanting to see him again because the last time I did, our faces were inches apart and I was hysterically crying. On the verge of an actual mental breakdown.

“Leave? You only just got here.” The voice shocking me out of my thoughts. My fidgeting hands stopping by my sides and going completely still. Maybe if I didn’t move, he wouldn’t notice me, and I could make a quick escape I thought to myself. My eyes still looking down at my feet, seeing Todoroki’s bare feet opposite mine.

“I hope you don’t think that if you stand still, I won’t see you.”

Feeling defeated, I looked up slowly. Taking in the sight before me. There was Shoto Todoroki, still dripping wet from the shower, towel hung low on his hips. Almost everything on full display. His whole body was toned and clearly built to be a Pro Hero. I didn’t think I had seen anything so sexy. The muscles of his body clearly from all the years of training.

“I- um. Thanks.” I choked out, trying to keep still, my eyes travelling up and down his body. Wanting to take it all in, knowing that I’d never be seeing this again.

“I told you I could see you naked.” I said quietly, recalling the conversation we had in my workshop. Wanting to relieve some tension. A hearty chuckle leaving his lips and reaching my ears.

“Do you want me to drop the towel? Technically I’m not fully naked yet.” He said back, voice flirty and lighthearted.  For a second you forgot the awkwardness you were feeling moments ago and laughed. His hand coming out and resting on your elbow.

“Are you okay?” He asked, the mood shifting again, becoming serious. His hands still firmly on me, warm to the touch. I hardly knew him, but he was comforting, his presence very quickly becoming one you didn’t know if you could live without.

He was charming, funny, smart and dedicated. All facts you had learned from him being in your workshop every afternoon for the past week. Both of you learning about each other, casually flirting and making jokes with each other. He had definitely come along was from the little first year who thought that if he smiled people would die.

“Thank you, seriously. I’m glad you were there.” I said honestly. Not sure what would have happened if he didn’t find me and help me get a hold of my quirk. The thought of feeling all those emotions for any longer making your stomach drop and fill with dread.

“You also didn’t have to stay with me last night, I know those cots aren’t too comfy.” I said, playing with a stray curl that had fallen out of the tie awkwardly. You felt bad for him really, you knew how small and not suited for someone so tall and broad they were.

“I wanted you in my room but Shinso took you off me. I didn’t want to let you go.” He admitted lowly, dropping his head and bringing it down next to my ear. His breath warm on the side of my face. My cheeks heating up, stepping back and out of his grip.

He looked sincere, his eyes honest as I looked into them, but I couldn’t fall for it. I wanted to believe him but deep down I knew how people really were. I knew that I couldn’t let anyone else in.

My friendship quota full, no matter how wet and handsome they currently looked standing before me.

“I’m going to wear you down Y/N.” He almost whispered, stepping out of his room to make up the space I made between us. His body pressed flushed against mine, the water from his torso wetting the material of my sweater. His hand came out and played with the bottom of the sweater, toying with the material between his fingers.

“Wear me down? Don’t say it like it’s so easy.” I admitted, looking up but not moving back. Our bodies, still pressed up against each other.

“I like a challenge.”

“I’m nothing like any of the villains you’ve face before.”

“I’m excited to find out just how different you are.” He said lowly, small smile on his face as his hand shifted under the sweater and rested on my waist, his other hand coming up and resting on my cheek. Holding me in place.

“I can feel it, this wall you have put up. From a past heart break or family drama, doesn’t matter. I’ll learn soon enough. Just know that I’m going to break it down and you are going to want to be with me just as badly as I want to be with you.” He stated so surely, his mouth inching closer to mine, his breath fanning my face. Stopping short of our lips touching, Todoroki shifting and kiss the corner of my mouth, right on the cheek.  

“We should go get some breakfast. Give me a minute.”

Without another word Todoroki turned and went back into his dorm, closing the door slightly to get changed. No, evidence on his face about what had just happened, or almost happened. Definitely the opposite of me who was beyond flustered, cheeks red and a little turned on.

                                                              *

The common room and kitchen looked different from when I saw it last. The couches were pushed back together, no empty bottles littered the floor and the space was completely bare of drunk teenagers unlike how it was when I left last night.

“Girl… so how are you feeling?” Mina asked, sitting next to me scooping food onto my plate.

“I have never been better; I feel so good about everything in my life right now. So balanced.” I said, looking over at her as she rolled her eyes.

“Sarcasm isn’t real humor extra. If you feel like shit you should just say it!” Bakugo said from the other side of me, nudging me with his arm. I had already thanked him for last night, feeling honored that he would stick up for me like that whereas Denki’s thanks would have to wait until he decided to emerge from his room.

“You have no reason to feel shit by the way. He is a fuck. He deserved the punch he got.”

“Not that I don’t agree with you, but I definitely think I should be held accountable for some of it. I mean he wouldn’t have acted like that if we weren’t sleeping together.” I stated, shrugging my shoulders and scooping food into my mouth.

“Just because you guys had sex doesn’t mean he can touch or talk to you like how he did. Once a dickhead always a dickhead.” Bakugo said back, sipping his tea.

You had to agree, the situation you were in last night had scared you. Watching Sen act like that startled you and reminded you that anyone was capable of anything under certain conditions. Before you could reply two large hands came down on your shoulders, squeezing lightly.

“Morning Y/N, sorry about last night. Sorry I couldn’t be there to help.” Kiri said sadly, concern clear in his tone.

“Where were you last night shitty hair?!” Bakugo yelled.

“I was with um Aiko… and Kameko and um whatever her twin sister’s name is.” Kiri said nonchalantly, scratching the back of his neck and sitting down in one of the spare seats at the table. I almost choked on my coffee, the fact that Eijiro Kirishima was casually talking about having a foursome over breakfast blowing my mind.

“Dude, you are my hero.” Mineta said, practically drooling as he looked at the red head.

“How do you even make that happen? What do you say?” Mineta asked.

“I do this thing called um respecting women and being a top guy. Something you clearly haven’t grasped.” Kiri said, slapping Mineta’s hand away that was held out for a high five. Bakugo chuckled to himself, turning back to his food as Mineta still probed Kiri for details. Which the latter absolutely didn’t divulge.

The mood felt nice. Comfortable. I was grateful to call these people my friends and know that we could talk and be like this together. As I looked around I didn’t miss Todoroki who kept his eyes firmly on me, which he seemed to be making a habit of and Momo, who had her eyes fixed on him