#i’m a behaviorist by training right

[dykedykegooses]

listen

[pokemonshelterstories]

I’m only asking because he eventually fixed the problem, but I’m still curious: my brother has a kirlia who used to absolutely HATE when he and his girlfriend kissed. Like, she would yell at them pretty much lol. She’s fine now after some training and getting her used to it, but I was wondering why you think that was? For reference, this was when they first got together, and she was fine enough with them hugging and with my brother kissing me on the head (the behavorialist wanted us to check)

it's not an uncommon problem for trainers of the ralts line, especially if the ralts is captive-bred. the ralts line form monogamous, often lifelong bonds with their mates in the wild; in place of a proper mate, they can sometimes project that onto their trainer instead. while they're not the only pokemon that can struggle with this, it's exacerbated by the fact that the ralts line turn the positive emotions of their mate and friends into energy; if that energy is directed at someone else, they can become territorial about it. it's not uncommon to see captive-bred ralts line pokemon surrendered to a shelter or rescue because they became aggressive towards anyone who took their trainers' attention. the reason why she was specifically upset about them kissing is likely because it was causing a stronger emotional reaction in him, and she could feel those emotions.

i'm glad things are doing better! your brother did the right thing by consulting a behaviorist and working through this with training.

[modern-day-bard]

Other Duties As Assigned: A Joel Miller AU Fanficiton

Content Warning: 18+ Minors, do not interact. This story includes mature themes such as drinking, stalking, violence, and explicit smut.

Chapter 11: Shatter

word count: 3.6k

Gwen

The Personal Security Nightmare needs to add nutritionist, sound expert, and fucking psychic to his resume. Apparently.

I suppose he could have become somewhat of a behaviorist over the years in his line of work…not that I really knew much about his work anyway. And I don’t plan to know. My interest has spiked in a very real, very stressful way, and I need to snuff that out as fast as possible. I know Nyah started to catch onto something being off when I asked her to give me Theo’s number. It had been a running gag for at least two years that every time Nyah had a photoshoot with Theo, he would find a way to ever-so-subtly bring me up in conversation.

He was about as subtle as a fog horn in a library. And he kissed like a fish out of water.

I tried to cleanse myself as much as I could in the car ride home which was increasingly hard to do with The Problem looking back at me every thirty seconds. I wouldn’t have had to go on that date in the first place if I hadn’t been so…moved by Joel’s arms around me the other day. Training me how to defend myself, and I can’t even fend off a few improper thoughts. Pathetic.

Joel was bolder than I gave him credit for. I figured Nyah would know I wasn’t telling the truth over the phone. I mean, she knew Theo. There’s no way I’d want to go on another date with that guy. And, she also knew me and how I view dating. I’m praying to any god who will listen that Joel could not hear Nyah say that this should push me enough to finally start dating. There would be no reason for Joel to have that information, and I have an icky feeling that he could somehow use it against me. Or that he would…look down on me or something. I’d expect him to react like he did with the guy from the club. What I hadn’t expected was not only for him to catch on so fast, but to call me out. How am I supposed to tell him that I’m not lying to Nyah, but instead trying desperately to distract myself from whatever happened the other day?

Thankfully, work has kept me busy. I might have wanted to set my desk on fire when I realized my dad refused to put me on the Isla Foundation, but attending meetings during the week and actually getting my hands on even analytical data has been a surprising reprieve from everything else. I missed working. I used to love to visit Russell Corp. and bounce around throughout the different divisions. Up until last year. Then I loved to travel, to leave.

Listening to Harper’s airy laugh though, that is one thing I loved about being home; my friends.

“I mean, you would’ve asked her to leave the wings on too, right?” She dabs a tear from her eye, still right on the verge of another fit of hysterics. In hindsight, Landon’s gallery opening might not be the best place to recount Harper’s private birthday festivities, but Nyah and I were too locked-in to worry. And Landon was too busy doing what they do best. They were currently flitting around the gallery, confidently chatting up what I could only assume were VIPs in the art-world.

“They didn’t, like, get in the way?” Nyah tips her head to the side, biting back a round of laughter herself.

“Well, I actually did get poked a couple times but…I sort of liked it.” Harper’s suddenly earnest expression is enough to make both Nyah and me crack up now.

“Oh, you got poked alright.” I wink at her and she hits my arm hard enough for a bit of my champagne to splash out of the glass. Immediately, she looks horrified by what she’s done, and I focus my attention on a painting a few yards away to keep from losing it again.

The atmosphere here was lively, but it wasn’t rowdy. Landon had successfully brought in dozens of New York’s finest, with Harper, Nyah, and me being the exceptions. Or as Landon liked to put it, “moral support.” We knew nothing about the beautiful pieces that surrounded us other than that they were, in fact, beautiful. I’ve been trying to pick up keywords for the past hour and failing miserably. Nyah and Harper have already given up, and the past three paintings we passed by, we decided it was best to admire them in silence.

“Oh!” Harper finishes a sip of her drink before setting her sights on me, “Landon told me you went on a date! How was that?”

“I mean I was trying to follow Landon’s advice…” I trail off, glancing around until I spot Joel. With the amount of people in the room, he’s certainly out of earshot, but he’s still close by. When I had seen him get into the elevator with only a black t-shirt and dark jeans on, I thought he’d look monstrously out of place. But he fit in here, surrounded by the paintings and sculptures. He’d even slicked his hair back a little today…I would never know he was on the clock if I was a passerby. He looked like any regular guy.

“You’re staring.” Nyah murmurs.

I whip my head around to face her, “I was double-checking his whereabouts. I don’t need him listening in on every conversation.”

“Especially if he can figure out you’re lying again.”

Harper’s curious eyes ping-pong between the two of us. “Were you going on a date to be normal and vet someone for once or is this…something else?”

“I just went on a date,” I say.

At the same time, Nyah says, “Oh, it was something else.”

“Someone just tell me before I get a headache.” Harper whines.

“Gwen freaked because she got hot and heavy when Joel was teaching her hand-to-hand combat so she went on a date with the first guy she could think of.”

“Hand-to-hand combat? It wasn’t military training, Nye.” I glance over at Joel, well, Joel’s arms again, avoiding their gazes.

“Joel turned you on?” Harper whispers, excitement sparkling across her freckled face.

“No! You know me, I’m only used to that sort of…closeness when I’m hooking up with someone. That’s all. It was a physiological response.”

The two of them exchange a glance.

“What?” I ask incredulously.

“Are you still trying to make him uncomfortable?” Nyah asks.

“Um…” I glance at Harper, knowing the entire story will alarm her too much. “Not exactly.” There’s no real reason to tell them that someone was able to gain access to my apartment.

“So you like him then?” Harper asks with a smile.

“Absolutely not. I’ve just decided that maybe a bodyguard isn’t the worst idea. And as we said, they’ll just assign me someone else. Plus he seems to be immune to everything I tried anyway.” Hopefully that will ease her nerves slightly. If what Landon said the other day was accurate, she has been worried about my safety.

“That, I can buy. He didn’t even notice when I flirted with him.” Nye adds.

“Or the bottle girl at the club, or the waitress on Monday.” I mumble into my drink.

“The waitress was flirting with him on your date?” Harper asks.

“Mhm.”

“All I’m hearing is that you notice every time someone makes a pass at him. Territorial, are we, Gwen?”

I narrow my eyes at Nyah. “Not at all. It’s human nature to notice.”

Her amber eyes are just as challenging in return. After a pause, she grabs an extra glass off the tray of a passing waiter. “In that case, you won’t mind if I offer him a drink?”

I grip the stem of mine a little tighter. “Not at all,” I repeat.

“Lovely,” Nyah swishes away, leaving me seething and Harper dumbfounded.

Joel is still situated close-by, near the entryway. I’ve had my back turned to him the majority of the evening, so I’m not sure if he’s still doing his classic, ‘look at me until I look away’ bit. I try to subtly stand next to Harper so I can get a good look at him now.

“I am…glad that you’ve decided to keep him.” Harper says softly.

“You make it sound like he’s a kitten we found on the side of the road.”

She smirks at me. “You know what I mean.”

“I know,” I say, linking my arm with hers. “Landon told me that you’ve been nervous.”

Harper clicks her tongue, “They weren’t supposed to say anything—”

“I’m glad they did. I’m fine, Harper. Seriously. This whole thing is just a nuisance more than anything else.”

“That’s what worries me, Gwen. Even I have viewed you as untouchable before, but you’re not. People are clever. The technology available now can make anyone vulnerable—”

“Harper, I’m keeping him. He never lets me out of his sight. You don’t have to worry.”

She studies me for a long moment. “Okay, fine. It makes me feel just a little bit better.”

“Good. Knowing that will make it easier for me to swallow.”

We both turn our attention to Nyah and Joel now. She’s giving him her best doe-eyes and he’s smiling politely at her. I’m mildly shocked and moderately irritated that he accepted the drink from her, but I’ve yet to see him take a sip of it. Nyah throws her head back, laughing presumably at something Joel said, but he just looks surprised.

“You’re gripping my arm a little tight there, love.” Harper murmurs.

“Sorry,” I let go of her, feeling my cheeks heat up. A rarity for me. And the shame of knowing your embarrassment is on display for everyone else just makes it worse.

“Anyone with eyes would agree he’s attractive, Gwen.”

“It’s not that I don’t think he’s attractive…” Nyah places her hand on Joel’s forearm and squeezes.

“But?” Harper raises a brow at me.

I feel my chest get tighter. There’s been too many moments like these in the past few months. Times where I teeter on the edge of the cliff of truth, and I hope someone or something will come along and push me over. I want to explain everything, all the things I can’t tell her. How Joel could be planted here to track and report, not just to protect. How long I’ve been in limbo, and how he throws a massive wrench into my barely-formed plans. But the weight of what it would mean for my family holds me back from the edge, and I give Harper a small smile.

“That part is irrelevant. I think a lot of people are attractive, and a lot less aggravating.”

Not wanting to watch Nyah essentially shove her chest against Joel any longer, I fill Harper in about how he called me out for lying.

“Damn, he’s fearless, you have to admit.”

“We’ve barely spoken since. I’m trying to ice him out… He’s gotten too comfortable.”

“Maybe he’s just trying to protect you,” she tries.

“From what? Protect me from lying to him?”

“No, maybe he doesn’t know if you feel like you can trust your friends. Maybe he’s just trying to suss out who you are, I don’t know. It wouldn’t be that wild. Especially since he seems so uncomfortable with Nyah now…”

That gives me enough encouragement to glance back over at the two of them. I try to ignore the glimmer of delight when I see him bending backwards to create more space between them. I know Nye is just doing this to test me, but I still don’t like it. And, fine, maybe it makes me a little relieved that he doesn't seem to like it either.

“Ooo!” Harper squeals, pointing in Landon’s direction, “Boyfriend! He’s here. We have to meet him.”

Sure enough, Landon was embracing a cute, curly haired man on the other side of the gallery. Just when I thought I couldn’t be more proud of Landon, they actually invited their date to the opening. When they pulled back from each other, I saw that bright blue glasses rested on the tip of Elijah’s nose, and his eyeline reached Landon’s shoulder at best. He’s perfect.

Harper is already dragging me over, but not before she uses her champagne-filled hand to wave down Nyah, pointing frantically toward Elijah. She’s mouthed boyfriend three times before she splashes any alcohol over the rim, which is an impressive feat. Nyah waves us on, much to my chagrin. I can feel Joel watching me walk away, probably wondering if he’ll have to move to ensure that I stay within his sights.

Landon looks apprehensive introducing us to Elijah, who is understandably startled by how tightly Harper hugs him. I’m just surprised she didn’t start jumping up and down.

I make an effort not to joke about how Landon has never introduced us to anyone. I’m sure Elijah knows this by now, but I don’t want to embarrass them. Especially not tonight. I’m no gallerist, but it seems to be going well. The place is packed, people seem happy, and most importantly, they are engrossed in the art. The last thing Landon needs is their group of friends teasing them about their love life.

“We’ve heard so much about you!” Harper exclaims, and Elijah’s cheeks turn slightly peach. It makes me beam at Landon like an idiot.

“I’ve heard so much about all of you. I’m surprised we haven’t met before, we run in so many of the same circles I feel like we keep missing each other.”

“That’s probably because we only dip our toe in the art circle when we have Landon to guide us,” I say.

Landon smiles, “You all hold your own just fine.”

“I’m lost on some of this, even. I might be in the art sphere but I’m a sculptor. I start to get confused when it comes to paintings.”

“Maybe we could all get drinks sometime instead? Drinking, I understand.” Harper holds up her glass as a demonstration.

“I would love that!” Elijah has a smile that could warm your toes, and the way Landon drapes their arm over him makes my heart sing.

That is, until I’m startled by a hand on my lower back.

“Sorry,” Joel’s gruff voice sounds low in my ear. The hand is gone immediately, and I try to ignore the small tug of disappointment in its absence. To my right, I notice Nyah making her way over as well, eyes set on Elijah and Landon.

“Could I speak with you for a moment?” Joel asks softly.

I nod, giving an apologetic smile to Landon, though they're already busy introducing Nyah.

Joel and I round the corner to another section of the gallery near the restroom. There’s less people in this corner, though a few waitstaff and patrons are milling about. The quietness of the area doesn’t seem to help, as Joel is wringing his hands, looking at anything except for me.

“What is it, Mr. Miller?”

With the mention of his name, his contemplative eyes meet mine. “At this risk of offending you again, I need to ask what that was all about.”

For once, I don’t have to feign ignorance. “What are you talking about?”

“Just give it to me straight, Miss Russell. Do you plan on making another escape tonight?” He places one hand on his hip, clearly agitated.

“At this moment I would like to escape, but no, I can’t say I made any preparations.”

“Then why send that friend of yours over to try to distract me?”

So he does understand flirting.

“By friend of mine, I’m assuming you meant Miss Abiola. And I’m shocked you were able to take the hint.”

His brown eyes turn molten. “It was supposed to be a distraction then?”

Exasperation coughs out of my lungs as I toss my hands up in the air, “No, Miller. It was meant to be a grown woman trying to get your attention.”

“My attention…?”

“She was flirting with you. Is having a thick skull a requirement for people like you? Does it double as armor?”

A spark of amusement appears and vanishes on his face in an instant. “Well, if that’s the case—”

“That is the case.”

“—If that is the case, I’ll need to have a discussion with your friends about those things. I can’t be distracted while I’m on the clock.”

I give him a once over. “I’m sorry. You had an actual model vying for your attention and that’s what you’re focused on?”

Joel takes another step toward me, and this corner, we’re less than a foot apart. “I’m focused on you. And I don’t want anything to get in the way of that.”

“Is that the same excuse for ignoring the bottle girl on Harper’s birthday? Or the waitress at the restaurant on Monday? You’re too focused on your job?”

He’s visibly confused. “What? They weren’t—”

“Oh, yes they were.”

“Miss Russell, I can promise I won’t entertain anything while I’m working. Is that what you’re worried abou—”

Glass shatters, and someone lets out a loud scream. In a split-second, Joel’s arm shoots out, pushing my torso until my back presses against the wall behind me. He turns, pressing his back into me with one hand resting on my side, as if to confirm I’m still there. The entire movement takes place before I can even register what’s just happened, before I can even take in another breath. I’m completely boxed in. A notion that would normally make me want to scream, to fight, to demand to be let free. But I didn’t feel trapped. I took one of my deep, calming breaths, and the smell of old leather and a spicy soap filled my senses. I felt…secure. Even though the only thing I could see was the cotton covering Joel’s shoulder blades.

A moment later, laughter ensues. I can hear an apology, someone explaining they startle easily, and another waiter saying they were going to grab some paper towels. I look down to my left, seeing Joel’s tense hand splayed wide, gripping my hip, and a familiar coil in my stomach forms. I shake my head a little, willing myself to focus.

“Um,” I clear my throat, forcing my voice back to normal, “Mr. Miller? I think we’re okay.”

Joel takes a half step away from me, turning to me first, examining my face as if something could have gone through him to get to me. I hold my breath, realizing his hand is still on my hip. I hate to admit it, but it makes me wish I had worn a skirt short enough to feel how calloused his hands were against—

Nope. No. Enough.

“It was just an accident.” My voice is much gentler than I expect it to be.

This seems to jolt him back into reality. He removes his hand, and gives me a nod that would have confirmed his time spent in the military, if Arthur hadn’t already said as much.

Joel peers around the corner, to confirm what I already suspected. It was just a spill, and one broken glass. Nothing so much as splashed on to one of the pieces. I haven’t seen him this…on before. He’s always a looming presence, but even now that we know it was nothing, he’s more electrified. His broad shoulders are still stiff returning to me, and the way his hands are pulled just slightly away from his body, it makes it look like he’s either going to grab me or knock someone out at any turn. For a moment, I actually want to apologize for Nyah’s flirting, especially since I gave her the go-ahead. When he said he was on the clock, he was really on the clock. But the moment passes when I remember his audacity to call me out on my lie the other day.

“Can I return to my friends now? Or would you like to detain the rest of the glassware on suspicion of grievous bodily harm?”

This time, there is no amusement on his face. Not even a flicker. He doesn’t look angry, exactly. Almost…pained.

“You can go,” Is all he says.

I pause, feeling like I should say something else. What I would say, I don’t know. Something to…calm him, I guess. Instead, I just look him in the eye one last time before rounding the corner, and finding Harper and Nyah by the front of the gallery. Landon is busy introducing Elijah to some of the older crowd whom I assume are very important.

“What was that about?” Nyah asks, inclining her head toward the direction I came from.

“He thought I sent you over as a distraction.”

“I see,” Nyah smiles proudly to herself, “Did you tell him I went over to prove a point?”

“Not exactly. I’m not even sure what point you were trying to prove.”

“Oh, the point was that it bothers you when other people flirt with your bodyguard.”

Harper’s eyes widen, but she keeps them on the floor.

“If I admit to your trivial point will you agree not to do it again?”

Nyah beams, “Of course.”

“Then fine. It bothers me. I feel…bad, Nye. He’s on edge. When we were talking, that glass shattered and you would have thought there was a bomb threat.”

They both glance in Joel’s direction, Nyah’s gaze curious, and Harper’s empathetic. “Well, don’t look!” I whine.

“Not going to lie, he does look tense,” says Nyah.

“Not to be a know-it-all, but maybe this just confirms what I was worried about.” Harper says, still looking at Joel.

“What do you mean?”

Her sad eyes rest on me now. “I just have the feeling that we need to start taking some of these threats seriously. He was hired for a reason. He knows that. He acts like it. And…maybe you should, too.”

Next Chapter

Previous Chapter

Masterlist

[melodytaylorauthor]

Positive reinforcement

I have a dog training and cat behavior service as a side hustle.

Not because it makes me a ton of money, but because I love animals, have worked with them for years, and because I enjoy helping people understand their pets better. If I can get a few bucks for that, great. The whole business is more for me and the animals.

When I got started training my own pets, I studied clicker training and how to use it, and I absolutely love it. Animals pick the clicker up so fast, and the principles of a reward-based system are incredibly useful.

Clicker training is where I learned the behavior terms “positive reinforcement,” “negative reinforcement,” “positive punishment,” and “negative punishment.” “Positive” and “negative” in behavior connotations are more like the positive and negative used in painting or photography — “negative” doesn’t mean bad, or punishment, it means “goes away” or “empty.” Thus:

“Positive reinforcement” means to reward desired behavior. So something pleasant happens in response to desired behavior. For example, when you tell your dog “sit,” and she does, and you give her a treat.

“Negative reinforcement” means to remove or withhold a reward for unwanted behavior. Something pleasant goes away in response to undesired behavior. For example, if your dog barks when you tell her to sit, you don’t give her a treat, even though she can see it.

“Positive punishment” means to punish unwanted behavior. Something unpleasant happens in response to undesired behavior. For example, if you tell your dog to sit, and she barks instead, you yell at her or hit her.

“Negative punishment” means to remove an ongoing punishment once desired behavior is given. Something unpleasant goes away in response to desired behavior. For example, your dog pulls on the leash, so you jerk on her collar, and when she stops pulling, you stop jerking.

FYI, punishment never works. Neither negative nor positive.

Reinforcement works. Both negative and positive, though positive is more effective. A better response to undesired behavior is to ignore it or ask for a desired behavior that the animal knows and reward that.

You may have noticed that yourself if you have a dog — jerking on their leash never gets them to quit pulling. People say things like “dumb dog!” when it doesn’t work — no, dumb human. What you’re doing isn’t working, maybe try something else?

Here’s why I’m bringing this all up on my writing blog:

People, for whatever reason in our current society, are taught from birth to use punishment. It’s used on us, we’re taught to use it on each other, on our pets, the police and justice system uses it to keep order, it’s used in schools on students, it’s used at businesses to keep employees in line,  and we use it on ourselves in our own minds when we think.

It. Doesn’t. Work.

I was wondering why we keep doing that, to each other and to ourselves, when behaviorists teach us that there is a more effective way. I wasn’t looking to answer the world’s problems or anything, just pondering imponderables. And suddenly, something important hit me right between the eyes.

When you don’t sit down to write, because you’re tired, because you don’t feel inspired, because your favorite show is on, because your brain is wrung out, whatever, you are trained to think: “I should be writing. I’m bad at this. I’m not a real writer. If I don’t sit down and get 100 words right now, I can’t have ice cream. Bad writer.”

You know what happens? Nothing. You don’t write, and you don’t get a break you probably need because instead of resting, you’re beating yourself up about not writing. So then the next time you “should” write, you’re tired and stressed before you even begin. So that makes it even harder to get started.

Instead of making you more likely to write, it makes you LESS likely to write.

It kind of sounds like “no ice cream” in my example is negative reinforcement, but reinforcement is all about what the subject actually wants. Some dogs want food only. Some want kind words, or a pat on the head, or a favorite toy, or a minute of play time. Humans can be a little more complicated. What you ACTUALLY want is not ice cream — you want to be proud of yourself. Ice cream is incidental. And in this instance, you’re implementing a negative punishment on yourself — shame — until you go write. Just like a dog on a leash getting yanked on, it doesn’t work. Or if it works one time, it doesn’t feel good, and you say things to yourself like, “Why was that so hard? I must be lazy or stupid or not really want this. Bad writer.” None of which helps you to write the next time.

When you sit down to write for five minutes, and then you give yourself a mental high five and go get some ice cream, you know what happens? You finish the longest book you ever wrote in half the time you ever wrote any other book, that’s what happens. Ask me how I know.

This is important information. We should be taught this all over the place, from the time we’re born. This is how you get your friends, family, kids, pets, and yourself to do the things you want. Ignore or redirect unwanted behavior, reward desired behavior.

Instead what we’re taught is the exact opposite. We’re taught to punish everyone. And then we get all pissy and butt-hurt when we don’t get the results we’re after — from anyone, including ourselves. “Well, I gave them consequences — why aren’t they acting better??”

“Consequences” are punishment.

Punishment. Doesn’t. Work.

This is also information it’s taken me far too much time to put together. I’ve been trying to figure out why I was able to write my longest book in the shortest amount of time. I wrote that book in 2010. Thirteen years ago. I could never figure it out. But I wrote the book so fast because I had just come out of a two-year bout of writer’s block, so ANY writing done felt amazing. It was easy to write for five minutes and be super proud of myself. I’d spent two years not even being able to write one single word. But once writing became commonplace for me again, my old habits of guilting and shaming myself fell back into place. It’s taken so much longer to write any other book — including the ones I wrote after that long one — because I’ve been shaming myself over how long it’s taking. And I only just realized this.

It’s time to retrain my brain back to that reward system.

Come on girl, stop barking and sit!

Good girl!!

[whumpcereal]

behavior modification

WRU has hired renowned behaviorist Dr. Ivan Peters to refine their training protocol for Romantic acquisitions. When Jack Kenyon--the brilliant young partner of one of Ivan’s med school rivals--applies to be Dr. Peters’ research assistant, he has no idea what he’s signing on for. Maybe reblog or leave a note if you feel so inclined? This is my first real whump offering, and I’m excited! 

part one: jack and ivan at dinner

content warnings for creepy whumper, implied future captivity and noncon, dehumanization, and vague references to childhood trauma and specific psychiatric disorders 

The restaurant is crowded, but not too loud. It isn’t the sort of place that ever gets out of hand. White linen table cloths, soft lighting, a gentle undercurrent of piano, polished stemware—everything exudes taste and class. Ivan knows it’s impressive; doing business here always gives him immediate caché with his potential interns. They want to be what he is. They want what he has.

Jack Kenyon is no different. At least, in theory. He is young and eager. He is looking to improve his resumé before applying to doctoral programs. He’s heard of Ivan’s work and wants to be a part of it.

But Jack Kenyon doesn’t know that he’s already been handpicked for a very special project.

Jack says all the right things, of course, and as he talks, Ivan lets his eyes move over the boy’s face, his body. Darling Jack takes pride in his appearance, that much is clear. Straight shoulders, lean jaw. Dark hair, thick, but neatly trimmed. Big blue eyes beneath a fringe of black lashes, the kind people always say are wasted on boys. Lips, sweet and pink; one corner lifts higher than the other when he speaks.

Ivan’s fly is tight just imagining what he’ll be able to do with those lips, the way those eyes will look up at him when sweet little Jack is on his knees where he belongs.

Ivan smiles at the thought and takes a careful sip of wine. “So, you’d want to focus on trauma work?”

“I do.” Jack nods eagerly. “I—it’s very important to me.”

He looks at Ivan for approval. It’s cute, Ivan thinks, how badly Jack already wants to please him. That will be useful. But Ivan will not tip his hand. Not yet.

“And why is it so important?”

It is a pointless question. Ivan already knows the answer. He’s done his research. But Ivan enjoys seeing the sudden alarm in Jack’s eyes anyway; it suits him. It is an animal’s unconditioned response.

“Oh, uh—”

“You don’t have to say, Jack. Not if you don’t want to.”

But darling Jack knows better. If he wants this position, he has to answer. And Jack wants this position.

At least, he thinks he does.

“No. It’s fine. I—well, I was in the system when I was a kid.”

“Foster care?”

“Yes.”

“I suppose you saw a lot of things.”

“I did,” Jack says softly. “I was a really angry kid. Oppositional-defiant disorder, intermittent explosive disorder—”

“Post-traumatic stress disorder?”

Jack nods, Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat.

Ivan’s seen the boy’s records, of course. Seven foster care placements before he was twelve, then a series of halfway houses and group homes until seventeen. And a stint in juvenile detention at thirteen, for attacking his foster father. The man had gone after Jack, and not for a beating. And Jack, sweet little Jack—he’d fought back.

Ivan hopes Jack still has some fight left in him. It’ll keep things interesting.

“But I got help,” Jack is saying. “There was—one of the group homes, it was actually run by someone who gave a shit—” he winces, and it’s adorable, “I’m sorry—someone who knew what they were doing. They hooked me up—connected me with my first counselor, and it was maybe the first time in my life I didn’t feel like what had happened to me was my fault. I—I’d like to do that for other kids—other people like me.”

Ivan nods. Jack will never do any of that, of course. But that doesn’t mean he won’t have his uses. Ivan will make sure of it.

“That’s a noble goal, Jack. To be of service.”

And he will be. When Ivan is done with him, Jack’s only use will be to serve.

“Thanks. But I’m not doing it to be noble.”

“Of course not,” Ivan agrees. “We’re all in this because we want to help people. Because we want them to find what they’re meant to be.”

Jack’s blue eyes light up. “Exactly. That’s exactly it.”

“You understand that my work isn’t exclusively trauma-based, yes?”

It is a white lie. What Jack doesn’t know won’t hurt him until Ivan decides that it should.

“Oh, yeah. But behavioral analysis is key to a lot of trauma-related therapy, right?”

Ivan nods. “Of course.”

“Then I’m sure working with you would be an incredible opportunity.”

“No need to flatter me, Jack. You’re doing quite well, you know?”

Jack’s cheeks flush a beautiful shade of red, and he fumbles for his own wineglass. “Well, thanks, Dr. Peters. I—I really wasn’t expecting to hear from you.”

“Your resumé is very impressive. And you’re just what I’m looking for. You understand that this project is at the request of a corporate investor?”

Jack nods. “I was going to ask—”

“Oh, we can’t discuss specifics,” Ivan says. “Not until final decisions are made. Legal matters, you know. But I need someone to, ah, sell the company on my research. And you, Mr. Kenyon, are a very strong candidate.”

Darling Jack looks quite pleased with himself. Ivan wonders what the boy will look like when he realizes what’s going to happen to him, what he’ll become. Perhaps those blue eyes will fill with tears before they go blank forever.

It will be beautiful.

“That’s wonderful to hear,” says Jack.  

“It’s the truth,” Ivan demurs. “Your graduate transcripts are outstanding, and to already have some publications under your belt? That’s quite impressive. I want someone with a sharp mind.”

The sharper the mind, the more fascinating it will be to dismantle. He smiles at Jack.

“I certainly hope I can offer you that,” Jack says with a laugh.

“I’ll take all you’ve got,” Ivan promises. He leans back in his upholstered chair, swirling the dregs of his wine. “Speaking of—this position is rather an intense commitment. I’d have to be sure that the person who takes it has the time necessary to devote to our research.”

“I mean, the semester is over soon. I’d be all yours after that.”

Oh, does Ivan like the sound of that.

“Would you? You don’t have any—personal entanglements that might weigh on your time?”

Jack grimaces, and Ivan feigns concern, even though he knows what Jack is about to say.

“Actually, I—”

“Yes?”

Jack scratches self-consciously at the back of his neck, and Ivan can’t help but imagine what that long, white throat will look like when it’s collared. There is an insistent twitch low in Ivan’s belly, and he spreads his legs just a bit wider beneath the table.

Jack’s cheeks are red again. “I—about that—well, you’re going to think this is crazy—I mean, it’s a small world, right?”

“Is it?”

Ivan knows precisely how small the world is, but he waits patiently for darling Jack to explain. The boy runs a nervous hand through his hair. An unconscious defense mechanism. Gorgeous.

“I’m actually involved with—I live with—I mean, I’ve been seeing Dr. Joseph Prescott?”

Ivan laughs. “Oh, of course. Old Joe.”

It was a minor scandal among their graduating class. Joe Prescott and his handsome infant of a graduate assistant, shacking up together. Jack was at least ten years their junior. But perhaps Joe and Ivan had more in common than Ivan had ever realized. Perhaps they both liked easy prey.

Jack bites the soft pink of his bottom lip. “I, well, I know that you two went to med school together. And that you didn’t really—I mean, you weren’t—uh—”

“Don’t worry your pretty little head, Jack,” Ivan purrs. “No, Joe and I were not close. But then we can’t all be psychiatrist to the stars, can we?”  

“That’s an overstatement. But Joe says that you were brilliant. Are, I mean. You are brilliant.”

“I am.” Ivan drains the last of his cabernet, politely blotting his lips with his linen napkin when he sets the glass back down. He is sure that Joe Prescott has other things to say about him, things that have nothing to do with his brilliance, but he won’t bring them up just now. “And you’re brilliant too, my boy. Your—relationship with Joe has no bearing on our work together. It’s immaterial.”

Or, at least, it will be. When Ivan is done with Jack, if all goes according to plan, the boy won’t even remember that there is a Joe Prescott. And even if he does, old Joe won’t ever see his pretty little boy again. Of course, Ivan’s work with Jack is about scientific knowledge—but watching Joe Prescott suffer will be an added benefit.

“Oh,” Jack says. “Well, that’s—that’s good, right?”

“Terrific,” Ivan replies. He nods to the sommelier, who returns to the table with what remains of their bottle of wine and fills Ivan’s glass again. Ivan leans forward. “You know, I saw that your Dr. Prescott is on the list of keynote speakers at next week’s APA conference.”

Jack beams, holding his glass out to the sommelier as well. “He is, yeah! On trauma-informed practices in combination therapy. He’s practiced for me. It’s going to be great.” He smiles to himself. “Joe’s the best. If I can be half the clinician he is someday—”

“—he is, isn’t he?” Ivan interrupts. “Will you be attending the conference then, Jack?”

And there’s that pretty blush again; Ivan hopes he never loses it.

“No. I mean, someone has to stay at home with the dog, right?”

“The dog?”

Jack laughs, and Ivan is not immune to the sharp line of the boy’s jaw as his head tips back.

“Carl. Our Berner. He’s a bit of a diva—he’d never forgive us if we left him all alone.”

Ivan clicks his tongue. “But you’ll miss Joe’s presentation.”

And Jack will be all alone.

“I told you—he’s practiced for me. I don’t mind. Besides, it’s the end of the semester. Finals to proctor, papers to grade.”

“No rest for the wicked, then?” Ivan says warmly.

“There’ll be other conferences.”

There won’t be. Not for darling Jack. No conferences. No papers. No doctorate. Nothing that requires thought or choice. He’ll be a sweet little lab rat.

Perhaps Ivan should be more concerned about depriving the psychological community of what Jack Kenyon has to offer, but he is not. Jack certainly has other charms that Ivan will enjoy taking for himself.

“If I get the job—” Jack hesitates, and then he smiles nervously at Ivan, “If I get the job, who knows? Maybe we’ll present our research together the next time.”

Ivan only raises his eyebrows. WRU certainly won’t want this research made public, and if Jack knew what he was in for, he wouldn’t either.

“Dr. Peters?”

“Hmm?”

“I—I know the interview isn’t over, but—”

Ivan smiles. “I’m looking forward to working with you, Jack.”

The boy’s face lights up. “You are?”

“Of course. The interview was mostly a formality; I just wanted to put a face to the name.”

“That’s amazing! I can’t tell you how grateful I am for the opportunity.”

“I know you’ll be perfect for me,” says Ivan.

“I’ll do my best not to let you down, sir.”

If Ivan were more committed to the bit, he would tell the boy not to call him ‘sir,’ but he does not; after all, it’s one less thing that sweet little Jack will have to learn.  

“Is all the information on your resume correct, Jack? Phone number, home address, that sort of thing? It’s important that my office can get ahold of you next week while I’m at the conference.”

Jack nods. “Oh, yeah. Everything’s current.”

“Perfect.”

It is, too. With Ivan out of town, no one will be able to tie him to Jack’s inevitable disappearance. And with old Joe at the conference, no one will know that Jack’s gone. Not until it’s too late.

Ivan raises his glass. “Someone from my office will be in contact next week with all the necessary paperwork. Shall we toast to our new arrangement, Mr. Kenyon?”

Jack’s smile is infectious. “I think we shall.” He clinks his wineglass gently against Ivan’s. “Thank you so much, Dr. Peters. I can’t wait to get started.”

Oh, sweet little Jack. “Neither can I.”

next >

[followthebluebell]

Can I ask your opinion on Jackson Galaxy? I like his stuff because it tends to be very easy for people to understand and implement, but I heard that he’s recently been backing vegan cat food?

I like his cat behavior work.  He’s done more to bring cat behavior into the public conscious than anyone else, and he’s done it effectively.  I advise my clients to read his books for the reasons you’ve already outlined: they’re easy to understand and implement. 

I’ve seen a few episodes of his program and largely agree with what he says.  There are DEFINITELY times when he stresses the cat purely for views---- there have been times when he’s deliberately antagonized a cat to get it to scratch or bite him multiple times.  Like, the cat clearly warns him ‘i am going to hurt you if you push me any further’, but he goes ahead anyway because the drama is great for views.  I’m not a fan of that.  But, this sort of drama goes hand in hand with tv shows. 

He also has said in the past that he’s not a fan of ‘silly cat tricks’.  I personally view cat training as a great source of enrichment, but I feel like this is just kinda getting nit picky.  It’s a personal opinion rather than a strong mark against the man.

As far as I know, he’s never endorsed a vegan cat food---- he endorses raw diets for cats, which I’m not a fan of in general anymore.  I HAVE fed my pets raw in the past, so it’s not like I’m perfect either.  I’ve advocated for raw in the past too.   He has endorsed a vegan DOG food in the past:

This was from November, 2018.  I don’t know if he still endorses this or not.  But, in this post, he clearly points out that cats are obligate carnivores and can’t thrive on a vegan diet.

If anyone has screenshots or evidence of him endorsing a vegan diet for cats, I’d appreciate seeing the proof.

He DOES still endorse using ‘flower essences’ to correct behavioral issues.  He’s peddling snake oil, which is downright shitty, especially for a behaviorist who knows better.  Using your image as a behaviorist----as a goddamn professional---to bilk desperate people out of money is fucking shameful. 

His toys are also pretty low quality, in my opinion. 

so, yeah.  Mixed bag of opinion right there.  I still tell people to buy his book (from a thrift shop preferably, or they can borrow it from me if I know them in person and I can trust them to bring it back) and to watch his show, but everything else is pretty bad. 

[imalayla]

After a year of time with Declan, I think I am going to be sending him back to his breeder. I'm not bonded to him at all, and the temperament and behavior issues he has are just way more than I bargained for or wanted to even deal with. He's made a lot of progress while living with me but my brain and my lifestyle do not allow a dog that requires a ton of management and keeping him away from everything. It sucks a lot and I really wanted this to work out but I haven't bonded with him at all, even with all the work and training we have done. Bringing him to conformation and other events and even traveling to friends houses is so stressful because of how much management he needs to not go after other dogs (he's not aggressive but he's reactive and struggles to settle without behavior meds.) I have to be mindful of my physical, emotional, and financial limits for a dog that requires this much.

It's gonna be hard but I went to a breeder specifically for a stable, well adjusted dog knowing I couldn't handle more than that, and unfortunately Declan is a hot mess express. Poor guy. He also has a hard time living in the city because we share a fence with the neighbors and he fence fights their dogs (he starts it 🥲) and goes after anyone walking by our house (we are on a corner lot that's pretty heavy with foot traffic) and we have to walk late at night to avoid him seeing anyone else.

And for context, I got him as a two year old and he's three now so. And yes I've worked with a trainer and my vet behaviorist. But I still feel like this isn't the right fit for either of us.

Now I have to work up the courage to email his breeder 🙃

[darkwood-sleddog]

I saw your comments on the dog training industry and the need for credentials and I found it pretty interesting, not only that but I have to agree with you. There are times I wish that there was something that could actually regulate the field but I don't think that will be happening any time soon.

While I'm still here I wanted to ask, does the behaviorist you work with have certification? I know most dog trainers I've met in person who think certifications are bullshit and I do agree to a little extent, but I find that someone having some kind of certification (CPDT-KA, CDBC, IAABC-ADT, etc.) shows that at least they've done the bare minimum. They might not be good trainers, but it shows that they know something more than someone who doesn't even know what the four quadrants are.

Yes my behaviorist is a Certified Dog Behavior Consultant, a Canine Good Citizen Evaluator and has nearly 20 years in the field doing behavior consultant work or other adjacent work with a long term interest in dogs that need alternative communication efforts such as deaf & blind dogs, primitive dogs, fearful or aggressive dogs etc.

The other behaviorist and owner of the facility I go to is also a Certified Dog Behavior Consultant and a Certified Professional Dog Trainer as well as a ASPCA Professional Responder amongst other credentials and I'm happy to work with either of them for their knowledge and experience.

Dog training would be a very difficult field to regulate and even if there was a regulatory body, those that dissagrees with those standards will likely put those standards down as being 'bullshit' or 'paid for' etc. etc. There is already so much contention and debate over what is correct in this field. Like certifications aren't everything to me, my behaviorists long history working with dogs that need very specific attention taken to their communication and her experience working with non-biddable dogs made her more appealing to me than her certifications, but still.

I think trainers that complain endlessly about the 'bullshit' aspect of certifications come across as very negative and I would not be happy to work with somebody that had that sort of attitude putting down other trainers. If certifications aren't your vibe simply move on. But if the certifications are so 'bullshit' why not just take the test and find out? If it's bullshit it should be easy enough to get those credentials right? What is so bad about taking these tests other than it rendering your ability to feel better than the others you talk negatively about obsolete?

[ask-a-vetblr]

Do u guys have any tips for training cats to do tricks like sit or give you their paw

vet-and-wild here.

The biggest tip I have is to manage your expectations. Cats can be very trainable, but they’re not dogs, so don’t expect them to behave like a dog. Personally, my cat is very food motivated and enjoys training, but has a much shorter attention span. My dog seems to handle an hour long class with no issue, but my cat I’m lucky if I get 5 minutes before he loses interest. Something I’ve noticed with other species too is that they’re less forgiving of mistakes. With a dog if your timing is off you can probably recover and still get the behavior you want (eventually, at least). My experience working with non-domestic canids, ferrets, and cats is that they are more likely to lose interest/walk away if you don’t get it right the first time. Figure out what motivates your cat. Is it food? Catnip? Play time? Petting? Cats can be a lot of fun to train, you just need to be patient while you both learn how to communicate!

Petshrink here:

Training cats is one of my favorite things of all time! As vet-and-wild pointed out, cats are not dogs. Once you find the right motivator for a cat, I would argue that they learn faster than most dogs. Cats that are very food motivated are the easiest to work with, but there are so many other things that can work. 

All of my cats have learned to sit on cue and wait quietly for their food. Chupie has a specific whistle noise that brings him running to me and he also loves touching a target stick with his nose. Training cats is a blast!

See the following resources for information on understanding and training cats: -clickertraining.com -The Trainable Cat by John Bradshaw and Sarah Ellis -Decoding Your Cat by the American College of Veterinary Behaviorists

[groenendaze]

do you have any tips for dealing w reactive breeds? my dog is a reactive breed and has gone down hill since abt 6 months and I’m at a loss for what to do since it is a breed trait and we worked really really hard to prevent it :y

im sorry anon :( reactivity really sucks and is super frustrating! finch is also reactive. 

my advice comes in two parts: the first part (1) is to find a licensed behaviorist or trainer that has experience dealing with reactivity and ways to manage it but also follows what YOU are comfortable with training. this is hard during a pandemic, but i know some trainers are offering 1v1 sessions through zoom. also (this sounds hypocritical) i would cation against listening to anyone who’s giving online advice and doesn’t know your dog. different things work for different people! 

the second part (2) is trust your instincts and stand up for your dog. no one knows your dog better than you. if you feel uncomfortable in a situation, you have the right to get out of that situation no matter what anyone else wants you to do. i sought out help for finch, listened to a qualified trainer, and ended up following directions that i would never do as training now. looking back on it, it probably made finch’s reactivity worse. 

[happyhealthycats]

The Alpha Argument

I see it a lot, many times when it comes to adopting cats.

“Well the girl cat is an alpha so I can’t adopt another cat.” 

Or

“My one cat is the alpha so they beat up the other cats.”

And I just wanted to say,

I understand what you mean, but please stop using the term alpha.

That term came from a dated canine training theory, so I’ll link y’all a few articles, since I’m not actually a canine behaviorist. 

https://www.whole-dog-journal.com/behavior/debunking-the-alpha-dog-theory/

http://content.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,2007250,00.html

https://www.animalhealthfoundation.net/blog/2017/10/the-myth-of-the-alpha-dog/

Essentially this theory cropped up as a behavior modification “technique” (heavy use of the quotation marks there), when some wolves were observed in what was assumed to be a pack exhibiting pack behavior. The observation and theory was later debunked in wolves, for several reasons (lack of sample size, relation of wolves to each other), but also the very important addition that dogs are not wolves.

So I’m gonna kinda drop a truth load on y’all.

If dogs are not wolves, cats are definitely not wolves.

I know. It’s shocking. But I’ve checked. Trust me. 

That is to say, felines behaving in an aggressive manner towards other cats is absolutely still -a thing-, but identifying it as “alpha” behavior is 1) incorrect and 2) allowing you to let a behavioral problem slide by simply by dismissing the behavior as something that just exists, when in reality it shouldn’t.

Don’t get me wrong, cats get upset at other cats. Anxiety and tension can get high for various reasons, from fighting over food resources when cats lack options of feeding, to literally “I saw a bird out the window and I can’t get it so now I’m HECKIN’ U P S E T and I WANT TO KILL IT but I CAN’T. So I guess I’ll give the other cat in the house a mean right-hook.”

There are a MILLION and a half reasons for your cats to fight, or not get along, but literally none of them are because your cat is an alpha.

In the “wild” (heavy quotes here considering Felis catus is an invasive species literally almost everywhere), cats do a LOT of stuff together. They will share food, they will communally raise kittens, they will protect what they deem as their territory, but it’s more akin to cats living in a communal building with some shared living space, but with a ton of extra rooms so you and your fellow housemates only HAVE to interact when you WANT to (like communal din-din). You know your roommate likes to read from 12-4 PM, so you stay out of the reading room during that time, because you have like three other rooms to choose from to do the thing you wanted to do. You can go use that room later when your roommate isn’t there.

So yeah, cat “territory” functions more as a time-share instead of like a hard black-and-white concept.

What happens when a new roommate comes into the house, though? Maybe that roommate doesn’t know the 12-4 reading room rule, so they barge in with something that roommate REALLY doesn’t want to deal with.

“What’s up, dude? I was thinking we could listen to some heavy metal! You like Dimmu Borgir?” “Hey, I’m reading right now. It’s my reading time. I always use the room at this time.” “Pfft, that’s boring. I want you to listen to Progenies of the Great Apocalypse. It’s my favorite.”

You can see why Reading Room Cat would be upset, right? Reading Room Cat might decide to lay down the law with a “Hey, you’re new here, you don’t make the rules for the reading room, take your heavy metal into the music room where it belongs”.

And yeah, cats can be pretty compartmental about what they allow in what area. Like play time should not happen near where they go to the bathroom, for instance. That’s weird. Cats don’t like the idea of getting through this level of Angry Birds while relieving themselves. The fact that they don’t like eating where they go is a little more obvious, but even playtime should be separate. 

This is just a single example, though. Like I said, there are MANY reasons why cats may not get along with another cat.

-They may not have the option to avoid the other cat in the house for whatever reason. They don’t have the choice to get up and away from them, they don’t have the choice to hide from them due to lack of ways around a room. Only so much we can do about that aside from knocking holes in the wall, but there is a lot we can do to help. Shelving, hides, tunnels, things like that. -One cat may want to play when the other one REALLY WOULD RATHER NOT, THANKS. -Cats may be fighting for a resource, such as food, water, or a litter box. Not having the option to get to choose where they can pee when all of the litter boxes are being used can definitely cause some inter-cat aggression. -Cats may be introduced too quickly to each other, or may be experiencing just a general issue sharing their space. It’s why I advocate for INCREDIBLY long socialization periods, and even re-introducing cats that have known each other for years should their relationships start to come into question. -One cat may be getting increased anxiety from an external source and may not have the adequate blow-off tool required. This is when increased play, puzzle feeders, and monitoring window-watching is important.

Those are only a few things, though. Things like illness, injury, sudden changes, a specific occurrence, and more can change how a cat interacts with another cat.

And yes, there are aggressive cats. There are cats that become aggressive more easily than others, and yes, those cats may live a happier and more fulfilling life without other cats in the home, or with limited interaction with other cats. They may need medication to help you figure out the best way to get them to live their best lives. There are definitely things you need to consider with cats, and some cats may just be more aggressive by nature, or by upbringing.

But it’s not because they’re an alpha.

So chose your words wisely! Try not to perpetuate a debunked theory for a different species by also tacking it onto feline-kind.

Unless you’re writing some fanfiction, maybe keep the alpha talk to discussing some Greek letters.

[twoterriblekids]

Ok soooo... a balanced trainer on FB said that his dogs enjoyed the ecollar. It was like a TENS for him and the dog.

Now, my nit to pick, is that I've never heard of an ecollar being positive reinforcement. Which is what the ecollar would be in this situation he proposed, right? His dog finds the sensation pleasurable or rewarding.

But earlier in that same thread he said ecollars were negative reinforcement. But that's not what he later described.

On another note... why do people say that their dogs are happy to wear their ecollar/prong/choke as if that's validation that their dogs like that tool?

I'm not saying this because I'm anti-aversive... I have a PERSONAL goal to be as LIMA as I can but I know not every situation is the same. But I also think there's a LOT of ways people can fuck up more with aversives if they're not being trained appropriately.

In any case, my point of contention is the fact that you can't try to persuade me 1 thing only to later say the opposite. Esp when the intent and use of the tools is the opposite of what you're saying. And if for some reason those tools are having the opposite effect on your dogs, that doesn't mean the same effect would happen... especially on a fearful and anxious dog that has been evaluated by a vet behaviorist that did not recommend those methods.

AND THEN THIS GUY SAID EACH DOG IS AN INDIVIDUAL ETC SO WHY ARE YOU SO HELLBENT ON CONVINCING THESE PEOPLE TO GO AGAINST THEIR BEHAVIORIST? And that was actually his whole point to responding. He wanted to make sure there was no propaganda etc for this person to read. WHEN ALL SHE ASKED FOR WAS POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT TRAINING. And he wanted to just say "well all training uses 4 quadrants and nothing is truly without negative reinforcement etc" ok but that's not what she asked. He wants to be pedantic to muddy the waters so she just goes against her behaviorist and it pisses me off.

don't tell someone to go against their vet behaviorist when you have not even evaluated their dog!!! How fucking irresponsible!

[cruelfeline]

Do you have any thoughts on Kevin Richardson, the Lion Whisperer?

I have to admit that I don’t really know too much about this individual. I really try to keep from watching too many non-documentary animal things in general, because many tend to be unpleasant for me to watch.

After doing a bit of research, I’d say my thoughts are somewhat mixed. Of course I support efforts at wildlife conservation, but I don’t necessarily support these sorts of interactions with captive wildlife, especially when they are posted on social media for all the world to see.

Too often, human interactions with other animals end up very focused on what the human finds pleasant or meaningful, while the actual experience the animal is having is less than stellar. There are often misunderstandings in terms of communication that lead to both animal and human being placed in dangerous situations. While it appears that he and the captive lions are enjoying one another’s company, that could change very, very quickly, resulting in severe injury or loss of life.

That said, if this man wishes to take those sorts of risks, of course it’s up to him; it’s his life. However, I don’t condone portraying these sort of animal-human relationships on social media, because social media often glosses over the significant time and relationship building and real risk involved in such relationships. In my experience, people are pretty stupid about animals; they don’t actually understand how many animals think, what they enjoy and don’t enjoy, and what safe, mutually enjoyable animal-human relationships really entail.

One only has to see people cooing over any random video of an uncomfortable dog being hugged or kissed (and complaining when informed that no, the dog is not actually happy, because how dare you ruin their fun?) to understand that putting videos out there without extensive education efforts is irresponsible. And by “extensive education,” I don’t mean a little blurb; I mean like, physically taking people aside and educating them. Because again: people tend to be dumb and more into seeing what they want to see than what is actually there.

So: conservation, yay! Publicizing these sorts of interactions? Boo. I know the usual excuse for putting these things on social media is to “raise awareness,” but I promise you most people seeing it don’t magically become more aware. Their thoughts tend to be limited to “oh wow how amazing I want to pet a lion!” And that’s about it.

I experienced the “awareness” that something like Finding Nemo brought to the ocean reef plight; it mainly involved me working in a pet store during undergrad and losing more faith in humanity every time some idiot tried to buy a clownfish to keep in a goldfish boy because wow their toddler loved Nemo so much; people end up caring less about the actual animals and more about their own personal feelings; it’s not a fun time

EDIT: I also don’t really enjoy the fact that he’s not a scientifically trained wildlife behaviorist, but another one of these “whisperers” who just kind of does what he feels is right with the animals. I see that sort of thing a lot with domesticated animals: “I’ve always had dogs, I’m great with dogs, I know dogs!” while reading a dog’s body language completely wrong. It’s the difference between these sorts of “self-taught” people and those who really put in the effort to understand the science and fact behind animal behavior, beyond just kind of winging it based on anecdote and subjective experience.

[darkwood-sleddog]

Do you have any tips on how to reward recalls? Like urgent ''Holy Crap Come Here Right Now'' recall reward VS a more relaxed recall reward I guess would be the best wording? Also I love your dog sledding videos they give me serotonin

Do you mean how do I reward for that kind of recall? I’m not a dog trainer by any means, just a person that trains my own dogs but this is what I do for the Moots:

For a more relaxed recall (non-immediate, more of a “this way” or “follow me” type of behavior) I use vocal praise and attention, low value food reward occasionally and then the dog is immediately released to run again. It’s important that the dog understands that recalling does not = the end of fun time. And changing up the type of reward and value of the reward can keep them guessing and coming back to check in and see what you have to offer.

For a more immediate recall my tone is more firm. I start with a leash loose and call the dog’s name and then add my recall word when the dog is near me in a low distraction area. Dog is rewarded the second they pay attention. I like using “party” type rewards for this (give the dog several high value treats not just at the same time, but one after another and generous affection. They’ll be held either with collar or re attached to the leash for a short time and then released again. Eventually I’ll work to long line and increasing distractions, occasionally giving a tug to the dog to indicate the behavior and eventually they’ll wean off that. High value rewards are very dog dependent. Slash likes ham, Sigurd & Zombie like turkey. Peanut butter is a big favorite and so is cheese (getting squeeze tubes of cheese/baby food made for toddlers has been a game changer for winter time high value rewards, my behaviorist is genious). I think high value rewards (be it the treats you carry or the ability to keep running free, both of which are incredibly enticing to my dogs) in ADDITION with genuine praise is an important partnership. Sometimes you won’t have treats or the ability to let go to run again in an emergency situation and our dog associating our genuine praise with other good things like treats and rewarding behaviors is important for times like those, they’ll be more likely to respond in those emergency recall situations. But my dogs, as sled dogs, are VERY used to vocal only praise.

Overall I really enjoy the primitive dog friendly methods laid out in THIS article by Couch Wolves (although I start my recall work much earlier than maturity...however my dogs do tend to relapse during their adolescent phase so I don’t work or expect anything regarding to recall at that time. I find they build more bad habits like ignoring me and it is really easy for them to self enforce those bad behaviors. I pick recall back up when they have their brains again and it’s worked better for me this go around with Slash as he is much more engaged and responsible than Sigurd for example).

I am not an expect by any means and I feel more secure hiking in public spaces with my dog’s leashed. I hate the idea that my pack of 75, 86, and 104 pound dogs would barrel up the trail and come across a young child, small dog, reactive dog, or person who is afraid of dogs (especially in woodland areas like mine where the trails are very tight and winding).

[snarky-badger]

Hey Snarky. I know you're busy unpacking and your askbox is technically closed. But I'm in dire need of fluff. I watched Keeanu Reeves get drunk, answer questions, and play with puppies and awwwwed the entire time. Could Shepard do this to Garrus? Garrus playing with many many puppies while buzzed.

Well, I don’t usually write Shakarian (because I’m afraid I’m not that good at them), but for you, yeah, I’ll give it a shot. This is after the Destroy Ending, Shepard’s alive and mostly well, if still recovering. It… didn’t turn out like what I originally came up with - it mutated while I was writing. But the mental images are fun! XD

                                                    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Shepard sighed and checked her Omni for the fifth time in as many minutes before shifting her weight from one foot to the other. Her left leg - or rather, the stump of her leg just below her knee - ached. The prosthetic, while state of the art, was still new enough that it caused her some pain from time to time. And standing there, waiting for a late Garrus, wasn’t helping.

Already, the muscles in her shoulders and neck were tightening, her heartbeat rising a little. Things since the Citadel - where she’d been buried under tons of rubble - had been a little touch and go. It had taken her months to recover after being found half-alive amongst the carnage, her body broken, spirit exhausted, but not extinguished.

Cerberus’ tech in her body had saved her, kept her alive though trauma that would have killed anyone else. More cybernetics had been added to her form as she’d recovered, pins and plates reconstructing her shattered bones enough for them to heal.

She’d never had made it though the painful rehab had it not been for Garrus. Even after the destruction of the Relay, he’d never given up hope of finding her again. Had practically reconstructed the downed Normandy himself in a near-frightening, tunnel-visioned, desperation to make his way back to her. It awed and shocked and stunned her, every time she thought about it.

Another glance at her Omni Tool made her left eyebrow twitch. She loved Garrus, but if he didn’t show up in the next five minutes, she might strangle him.

She hated being late.

Sighing, she leaned heavily on the cane that had been provided to her while she got used to her new leg, index finger tapping against the handle as her keen gaze cut across her surroundings.

You could take the soldier out of the battlefield, but the instinct to identify potential threats, scope out exits and cover for any firefights wasn’t something that just went away - no matter how much of the Citadel had crashed down onto her.

Finally, finally, she spotted a familiar form amongst the crowd, her gaze locking onto the scarred Turian in civilian clothing that was sauntering towards her.

Oh, lords, he was strutting a little too.

Someone save her, Garrus was drunk.

It wasn’t readily apparent to anyone who didn’t know him, but his gait, the slight tilt to his head, the smirk of his good mandible - dammit, he’d gone drinking without her!

She was somewhere between irritated and mildly jealous when he reached her, the low rumble of his subvocals lightly slurred, blue eyes a little glazed.

“I know, I know. I’m late–”

Shepard huffed, blowing a strand of her overlong red hair out of her eyes. “You went drinking without me.”

Garrus blinked, then spent a moment looking anywhere but at her, raising his right hand to scratch at the back of his neck. “Ah. Uh, a little? Chellick - you remember him right? He’s… well, I suppose you can say he’s getting married. Found his bondmate and everything! Never thought he had it in him. Joker used to think I had a stick up my ass but Chellick–” He glanced at her, saw the look on her face, and coughed a little. “Right. Well, I went to say congratulations and then some of the old squad wanted to treat him to a drink and… yeah. But I’m alright, really! We can go see the large hamsters now.”

It took an inordinate amount of willpower not to facepalm. “Puppies. Dogs. Not hamsters, Garrus.”

“Wrex said they’re furry, wimpy, varren.”

“Wrex would.” Even though she was still a little miffed, Shepard accepted the arm that Garrus held out to her, linking her arm through his. He easily shifted his stance to help support her, which was good, because standing around waiting for him had caused the muscles in her bad leg to cramp a little. “I guess it’s a good thing you’re a friendly drunk.”

“I am not drunk,” Garrus huffed, trying for affronted and failing, settling for a grumbling growl of his subvocals. “I’m not as think as you drunk I am. Wait. Wait, that didn’t sound right.“

She heaved a sigh that she usually only made when dealing with the Council. “Just… let me do the talking.”

It was, as it turned out, good that she did the talking. Whatever the hell that Garrus had imbibed must have been strong, because even his ability to ‘fake’ sober seemed to be cracking at the edges. It didn’t help that a drunk Garrus was also a slightly handsy Garrus. Normally she’d be all for her Turian purring things to her while nipping at the shell of her ear, but this was just not the time.

The quest to adopt a dog - by the suggestion of both her therapist and rehab specialist - was off to a rocky start. Personally, Shepard did miss having a pet, and she’d always loved dogs, but she’d never thought she’d be interviewing to adopt one with a touchy feely Turian attached to her hip.

Still, they managed to get to the Adoption Centre with little trouble - minus a couple of elbows to Garrus’ ribs to get his wandering hands off her ass.

She planted him in the nearest chair, then hobbled over to reception. The Asari there didn’t pay her much mind until the receptionist looked up, and Shepard had a grand view of the usual shock and awe that most people got on their faces when they recognized her.

Ugh. She doubted she’d ever get used to receiving that look.

Still, it did expedite things. She and Garrus were quickly led to a small private room to wait while some of the staff went to fetch a few of the dogs that the resident behaviorist thought would be a good match for them.

Garrus was weaving a little in his chair while Shepard filled out a few necessary forms on her Omni - did she have a veterinarian picked out, did she have previous experience raising dogs, etc, etc, etc. Spirits, some of the questions  were more in-depth than some of her Spectre applications.

Finally, she send the forms off with a soft chime of her Omni tool, then poked Garrus with her cane when he shuffled his chair closer to hers and leaned in to rest his chin on the top of her head. “If I sit on the floor, I’ll need your help to get back up again.”

“I can do that,” he rumbled, the vibrations of his voice echoing into her, the familiar sensation making her smile despite herself. Garrus’ right arm slid around her waist, tucking her close, and Shepard automatically leaned into him, letting his presence ease her nerves and calm her.

She was just relocating his hand from her ass back to a safer spot on her hip when the Asari came back in carrying a large basket. The sounds of whimpers and soft barks perked Shepard’s interest, and she carefully eased herself down off her chair to the floor, grimacing a bit when her left hip twinged.

Garrus landed next to her with a graceless thump, his gaze locked on the basket, the curious subvocal rumble that left him vibrating her bones. Who knew that whimpering puppies sounded like to a Turian?

“So, I thought I’d start with some puppies. These are a mix of German Shepard and Labrador Retriever. Both breeds are known to be very affectionate, intelligent and obedient with the proper training, which I doubt would be an issue for you two.”

“How old are they?” Shepard asked as the Asari - her name tag read Jaelta - knelt and set the basket down. Six rolly polly puppies instantly scrambled to climb over the edge, bright eyes and perked ears obviously taking in everything around them.

“These are six and a half weeks old. We’ll keep them for another two weeks just so they finish weaning and grow a little more. So if you decide to adopt one of these little ones, you’ll have time to accessorize your home.”

The sextant of puppies - one of whom decided to front flip it’s way out of the basket and land on it’s head with a yelp - instantly swarmed her, and Shepard couldn’t stop the laugh that left her as they climbed over her legs and into her lap, wriggling and yipping for attention. She pet as many as she could manage, feeling some painlessly knaw at her fingers while others crawled high to lick at her chin.

“I still say they look like large hamsters,” Garrus quipped, and Shepard rolled her eyes at him as she scooped up a puppy and then deposited it in the Turian’s lap.

He reared back a bit like she’d thrown a live grenade onto him, mandibles clamping tight to his face in apprehension. The puppy sniffed at him, probably the first Turian it had ever met, little tail waggling it’s entire little body. It’s final happy bark seemed to be an invitation for the rest of the pack, because Shepard found herself abandoned as they others piled themselves onto an unsuspecting Garrus.

“Uh, Shep– What do I-? Ow! Hey! Don’t chew that!” He reached down to disengage a puppy from his left spur, blinking into brown doggy eyes as he picked up the pup to stare at it. The puppy wriggled happily in his grasp, barking, little paws churning the air as it tried to get closer.

The biggest of the bunch gave up trying to climb him, and merely launched itself into the Turian’s stomach. Garrus’ eyes widened as he went down with a started ‘oof’, landing on his back and warbling in shock when the other dogs swarmed him.

Puppies: 1. Garrus: 0.

Grinning, Shepard took a quick picture with her Omni Tool. The universe’s King of Bottle Shooters and Reaper Advisor to the Primarch, taken out by a pack of puppies. No one would ever believe it.

“I think we’ll take that one,” she grinned to Jaelta, nodding at the puppy who had headbutted the Turian in the gut and was now perched on the edge of Garrus’ cowl, licking at his mandibles, despite the sniper’s attempts to twist away from excited, wriggling, happy, puppy kisses.

Garrus flailed, trying to be gentle as he pushed one puppy away just for two more to wriggle into the firsts’ spot. There was one attached to his left spur again, hanging on with determination while the Turian’s legs spasmed on the floor. Another was chewing a hole through his glove, using his tough plates to teethe on. “Shepard, help, Sniper down! Ack! Pfft! Ew! It’s tongue was in my mouth! Ah! They’re so fuzzy! Geditoff–!” Her Omni Tool glitched at what followed.

She’d have to send a copy of the image to Tali or the Quarian would never forgive her.

[doberbutts]

And the followup post, here.

Okay folks, this is one I’ve resisted posting about for a while, but enough people have sent it to me (including a link from WADTT from a group where the author goes further into detail on this subject, thank you darling <3 ) that I guess it’s time.

I’m going to start with- this is why I don’t like it when people who are not involved in something decide they want to judge something they don’t know anything about. I’m, of course, not saying this woman doesn’t know anything about dog training- her credentials are enough to say otherwise. But the phrasing of both of these articles indicate that she has never taken her dogs through a CGC before and, indeed, has never done any sort of AKC event before. In fact, one of her main problems with it (and one of her source’s main problems with it, but I’ll go into that later) is that the AKC is an organization that makes money because people do stuff with their dogs with said organization. Her source is more talking about puppy mills- in which it exaggerates a bit and implies that the money the AKC makes yearly is mostly coming from litter entries (ignoring the large sums coming from show entries, titles, etc) while her post implies that they’re getting quite a hefty sum from CGC entries (ignoring... all the other stuff the AKC does). Another reasons she gives for not liking the CGC is that the rulebook states that they don’t care what method you use to teach the items- something true of all AKC titles- as long as your dog is in the approved back-clipping non-restrictive harness, flat collar, martengale collar, or slip collar come testing day. She even does not like that the CGC allows the slip collar to be used during the test, despite the fact that- like all AKC titles- it’s not meant to be used during the test, as correcting your dog even verbally will fail you.

Far be it from me to claim the CGC is the end-all of dog behavior. We have had dogs right here on dogblr that decidedly were not the epitome of good temperament pass CGC and even CGCA. I’ve passed a dog that I know is dog aggressive, but he was not during testing time or class, so I also could not fail him. I just had an argument with a high profile dobe breeder about why the CGC program is not an ideal standard for service dogs. I have my own problems with the program, and my own problems with the AKC, and I can’t really say either is perfect.

I’ve taken close to 50 dogs through the CGC in 2018 and the first couple days of 2019 alone at this point. As most of you are aware, I am not a +R trainer by the strictest sense of the term. As most of you are also aware, I am required to be so while at my job. That means the vast majority of my students must adhere strictly to force-free methodology, and exceptions may only be made when there is a serious safety concern regarding strength of dog vs strength of human. This also means that the majority of my CGC students have run through the CGC without ever feeling any sort of pressure or compulsion. While, yes, the rulebook does state that whatever methods you want can be used for teaching the items, my job states that I am much more limited. Besides that, I’m pretty pro-don’t-punish-your-dog-for-not-reading-your-mind and anti-use-corrective-collars-to-fix-your-shitty-foundation, so there’s that too, even with my personal dogs aka dogs I’m allowed to actually do whatever I want with. Just as an aside, but I took CGC classes at Petco as well when I ran through the program with Creed because I can and they’re free for me, so I also was not allowed to have him on anything more corrective than a martengale during class or test. This means no slip collar either- something allowed by AKC rules but not by the testing facility. Clearly the CGC can be passed while sticking firmly to a +R ideology.

But that’s not enough- in the group where she discussed her reasonings for this, the mere fact that the CGC rulebook states that it allows slip collars, that you can do whatever you want in training, and that the AKC refuses to totally ban metal aversives is bad enough to never want to take a CGC. Simply funding the organization with your $10 is bad enough to not want to do it. That, to me, is more than a little ridiculous.

Onto the next point- the fear that more people beginning to require a CGC to insure or rent to dog owners would split up dogs and humans- specifically fearful or aggressive dogs, and low income families. This is a tricky one to navigate, and one that I’m very much wishing she hadn’t thrown human social talking points into (misogyny, violence against women, income status, etc). First of all- there is no current punishment for failing your CGC besides a little bit of embarrassment or frustration if you thought your dog was ready, so the whole “scarlet letter of bad citizen” is exaggerated hyperbole at best. Second of all, no insurance company to date has required a CGC that I am aware of, but has given discounts for one being present. Third, HOAs and landlords have actually changed from disallowing pets completely to saying that they will allow a pet if it’s trained to a visible standard- this is a good thing. This is not “landlords and HOAs used to allow dogs all the time but now they require your dog pass a test”, it’s “landlords and HOAs used to not allow any dogs or only allow dogs smaller than 25lbs or have breed bans and now instead of that they just want to make sure your dog is somewhat trained”. Forward progress. Creed failed his CGC at 13 months. He passed it at 22 months. Failing it the first time had literally zero effect on his ability to pass it the second time, except that I knew what things he still needed practice with before our second go around.

If your dog is too fearful or too aggressive to pass a CGC test with dedicated training, you probably shouldn’t be renting with it. These are easy things to pass and things your dog will have to navigate at some point in its life. Your dog is going to need to be touched by strangers at the vet or groomer. Basic obedience- positions, recall, stay, those are things that literally save lives in emergency situations. Your dog is going to need to be able to peacefully coexist with other dogs when going outside to pee, on a walk, at the vet, at the groomer. With the increasing number of vets that take the dog into the back, away from its owner, for simple procedures like shots and blood draws, your dog is going to need to be okay not being next to you for a whole 3 minutes. Not everyone likes dogs, so it’s imperative that your dog can walk by strangers without bothering them, especially if you have neighbors in the same building. While loose leash walking and distractions are perhaps the most easily discarded of all of these items, the #1 complaint I receive as a dog trainer from new clients is that their dog pulls on leash. The #2 complaint is that the dog is easily distracted by everything and thus “doesn’t listen”. That’s your 10 items on the CGC. If your dog cannot do those things with a combination of training and management techniques, then, yeah, your dog probably shouldn’t be in a rental and you should look into additional training. Additionally- dogs that bark constantly, especially at movement/sound from neighbors or due to seperation anxiety, get their owners evicted. That’s the hard truth. Dogs that are not properly housebroken get their owners evicted, or at the very least get their owners charged thousands of dollars for repairs when an angry landlord has to replace flooring or carpet or furniture. That’s why the dog owner pledge exists.

HOAs are much the same- barking dogs get neighbor complaints which then get you evicted or fined. Leaving a dog outside to bark in the yard is one of the biggest reasons animal control gets called on dog owners. A pesky neighborhood gardener has the right to work in peace- if your dog won’t stop barking, nothing is stopping you from bringing it inside or moving it away from the windows. I don’t know why we suddenly jump to taping the mouth shut or surgical debarking- unless the dog cannot be calmed once it starts, in which case a visit to the vet and a behaviorist (or trainer otherwise skilled in BAT) is in order to determine what combination of management techniques and medication is required for the dog to have its extreme anxiety or aggression calmed to a more reasonable point where it stops being unfair to the dog to exist in such a stressful mindset. The pledge does not say you can’t do that- and anyone working with a trainer to pass the CGC should be provided that option should they request it.

People don’t like it when dog owners let their dogs poop in their yards. Even if you clean it up, there’s still residue. It’s also pretty terrible for the environment to not pick it up in your own yard, as well as a public health and safety hazard if allowed to collect over a long amount of time or if there are multiple dogs. E.coli, salmonella, coccidia, giardia, and various parasites such as roundworm and tapeworm can and do spread to humans if on contaminated ground- a worry for children who may not know better than to put their hands in grass a dog has recently pooped on and, since there’s no visible trace of poop anymore, then puts their hands in their mouths. Distemper, parvo, and lepto spreads to dogs with weak immune systems that cannot be vaccinated, or puppies who have not completed their vaccinations yet. Rain water pushes these diseases out of a dog owner’s yard and into other ground as well as into rivers and other sources of drinking water. Making sure that your dog only uses certain areas to go to the bathroom, and then immediately doing your best to pick up after your dog is the only acceptable compromise. And people are very bad at even doing that- outside of my store, where there is a poop bag station every couple of feet, we still completely fill a trash bag full of poop weekly because people will not pick up after their dogs. That’s why the dog owner pledge exists. At least daily inside of my store, we discover a trail of feces and urine down an aisle from a dog owner that either wasn’t paying enough attention to their dog to see that it was doing that, or that didn’t care enough to clean it up, even with several easily accessible clean-up stations within the store. Sometimes it’s right at the clean-up station.

That’s why its phrased the way it is. Good citizen- or in Canada, good neighbor. It’s an attempt to curb bad human behaviors while also teaching dogs a very simple, easy-to-pass test. If the CGC or CGN isn’t your cuppa, there’s also others such as CLASS and SPOT and even various things from DMWYD. But all of them are similar in that they attempt to solve this problem as more people with more dogs becomes more widespread.

As for the rest- dogs that growl get dismissed from the test. This does not mean dogs-that-growl-ever. This means, dogs that growl during the test. It’s included because the AKC got tired of evaluators and judges and other dogs being attacked by dogs. Any aggressive behavior whatsoever displayed during the test is grounds for automatic dismissal in the vast majority of AKC events. This prevents the owner from attempting to “work through it” and invariably flooding the dog and getting someone bit. Instead, the dog is dismissed, and the owner is forwarded to someone who can find out why the dog is growling and how to make the dog more comfortable with whatever the problem was. Dogs that cannot hold their urine for the 30 minutes max each test takes, yes, get dismissed, because nobody likes a dog that pees all over everything. This includes dogs that submissive or excited pee, because the owner should be working with a vet and behaviorist on proper management solutions. Dogs are allowed to startle during distractions, as long as they do not attempt to flee, run, or bark. It even says the dog may look at the distraction with (mild) interest, as long as it is neither pulling towards the distraction nor running away from the distraction.

Once again, far be it from me to be the white knight of the CGC or even of the AKC, but this article is, frankly, mostly the same type of nonsense I always hate seeing from people who wish to make talking points about things they’ve never experienced and thus don’t have any idea what they’re talking about. Again, I am not saying this woman doesn’t know what dog training entails. Her credentials alone say otherwise. But I am saying that it’s very clear she’s never even attempted the CGC, nor attended a class of people attending the CGC. Again, in the FB group where she discusses her reasoning, she even says that while she understands people do go through the CGC with all forcefree training, her problem is that it allows people to not do that, and so it’s still unacceptable. So all training is required to be forcefree, written in the rules, or else there’s the potential that someone somewhere might do something to their dogs that she doesn’t like, and so it’s bad. That’s... ridiculous.

There’s also some things at the end about wanting legislature to require forcefree only training, about wanting all dog trainers to pass a certification that requires people to only use forcefree training, and some bits about people like me who occasionally use tools not allowed by +R methodology in certain circumstances being inhumane and unethical, but I won’t go into those more than my warning that I always have for things like this.

Always be careful about strong opinions formed by people who have never done or experienced or worked with the thing they have strong opinions about. Especially so when they are strong opinions that may become enforced by law. At that point, everyone loses.