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vanaera · 5 years ago

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The Heart Holiday | Act 1 | myg

Synopsis: Valentine’s Day is declared as an official holiday. However, private companies’ standards dictate it’s only for the people who are currently in a relationship. Unluckily for Y/N, she doesn’t have this year’s PRS’ (Proof of Relationship Status) “in a relationship” box ticked – the only ticket out she can have to enjoy one paid week of holiday leave away from her hellish job. And more unfortunately for Y/N, everyone around her is oh so conveniently currently committed in a relationship. Except for one person: Min Yoongi, Y/N’s biggest critic in every pitch meeting, the picky guy who always picks on her, and the most annoying jerk of the century. Desperate for that holiday leave, Y/N strikes Yoongi up with an offer: Fake date each other two weeks before February 14, just enough time for the Department of Relationship Management (DRM) to consider processing your PRSs. After Valentine’s Day, they will go back to their own ways and never speak about whatever that may happen during the plan. Good, plain, and simple. That is until, Yoongi uncharacteristically oh so enthusiastically agrees to Y/N’s offer, leaving her thinking that she may have bitten something too much more than she can chew.

Characters: Yoongi x Female Reader

AU/ Trope: Office AU (Creatives manager!yoongi x PA!reader), enemies to lovers, fake dating

Genre: fluff, angst, comedy (the triple t(h)reat)

Wordcount: 11, 798

Warnings: Lots of curses from two emotionally-constipated characters (PG-15 Rating)

A/N | This fic is in part with FWL’s Valentine’s project, The Luv Library: Romance. I had this premise about a Valentine’s holiday for a while and finally, I got to use it for this fic.

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Ten seconds are enough to look at Min Yoongi. Two seconds to look at his unkempt, unprofessional, and stupid fringes that nonsensically cover his already small eyes. Three to look at his stupid, smug smile. Another two for his overly-confident stance—leaned forward in his chair, elbows on the table, hands clasping together—as if he’s better and of higher power than anyone else around the room when he’s just a measly representative of the day for the Creatives Team. And the last three seconds—they are enough to look at his mocking eyes, his jeering gaze, and the arrogant quirk of his brow.

This is the same look he gave to Y/N when he got promoted ahead of her. This is the same look he flashed to Y/N when he berated every word choice in her reports. And, this is the same look in his face when he ruined her presentation which could have been her ticket way out from this hellish job. Smug, arrogant, and proud, Min Yoongi is set to ruin Y/N’s life. And all Y/N could do now is glare at him and hope her eyes could set him on fire so it will be easy for hell to swallow him up and—

“Y/N?”

Y/N whips her head to her right, “S-sorry?”

Nancy Kim clicks her tongue, “Why are you just standing there, glaring at the windows? I told you to distribute the copies among the room.”

“R-right,” Y/N gulps and rushes forward. She hands the copies of last month’s Travel Loca issues among the representative of each department. Gracie from the Marketing Team sneaks her a small smile, which Y/N returns. However, that smile falls into a frown when she reaches the devil himself.

“Good morning, Y/N,” Min Yoongi greets, chin rested on his palm. When Y/N doesn’t greet back, Yoongi takes it upon himself to wink at her. With a huff, Y/N slams down the copy on the table in front of him, enough for the glossy, firm cover page to hit his pile of notes and cause some pages to fly off the table.

“Thank you, Y/N,” Nancy calls out, sighing. She waves away at Y/N and the latter takes it as a cue to sit back on her chair. Nancy leans back in her huge black chair, “Okay, let’s get the ball rolling. Now tell me something I don’t know.”

Y/N seats herself on the chair by the corner of the room, behind Nancy’s chair, far from the round meeting table. Every team representative starts to report their progress last month and their suggestions for the next, next month’s issue. Meanwhile, Min Yoongi is still busy picking up his notes on the floor. When he’s gathered them back, now in a sloppy stack, he looks from his crouched position and flashes Y/N his middle finger. She flashes back a finger at him, grinning. Y/N looks down at her small pocket notebook.

“Y/N – 1. Yoongi – 0.”

So far, this morning is really good.

Y/N hates Min Yoongi, and this is beyond an understatement. She hates him so much that the word “hate” started to become insufficient to describe her tantamount distaste for that man. Y/N blames his last name for that. “Min” should not be how his last name spelled. It should be M-E-A-N because that man is beyond mean.

When Y/N first met Yoongi, she knew there’s something off with him. He stands so arrogantly, so prideful as if he deserved every bit of the floor space of Travel Loca’s Main Office when he just got hired because there’s no other job-seeker that has actually applied. Yoongi looks at other people as if he’s any much greater than them. Lazy eyes, far-off gaze, indifferent façade—he just looks at you as if he’s listening when he’s actually just hearing so he can make some witty comeback. And Yoongi talks like a dictator know-it-all. He corrects every word people say here and there, like “Y/N, are you sure it’s ‘demonstrate,’ not ‘visualize’? We can’t physically see something if there’s nothing to see,” or “Y/N, you shouldn’t say ‘Xerox.’ It should be ‘photocopy.’ Xerox is just a brand, our junior high teacher told us so,” as if every word anyone says but him, will always be wrong. Yoongi talks as if no one but him will always be right and that everything around him does not deserve a bit of his attention unless they prove their worth to him.

And it frustrates Y/N to no end that no one seems to see his real form but her. Because apparently, Yoongi is “amazing.” Yoongi knows a lot of foreign places, having traveled to Malta, New Zealand, Hawaii, and yaddah yaddah, making his first-hand knowledge essential to the Writing Department. Yoongi has a lot of expertise in various editing apps, and he’s willing to teach the tricks and nicks to it to anybody. Anybody but Y/N. Because behind closed doors, Y/N knows his true face: Min Yoongi is a thick-skinned, double-faced bitch. That even if his name is on the tip of the tongue of anyone around the office every single morning, his quick promotion as manager of the Creatives Team a never-ending topic starter, Y/N knew the real story. Because Min Yoongi started out as Nancy’s Personal Assistant…just like Y/N.

Nancy Kim is the best photojournalist in the history of travel magazines. God-tier even, because when Nancy is just an intern in The Traveler’s Foot, she wrote the best articles Y/N has ever read. It didn’t matter if they were about a cliché tourist spot that has been featured over and over again or something bizarre that could make anyone wonder someone in their right mind would actually go there. Nancy is the goddess of travel journaling and Y/N obsessively consumed every article she wrote during her entire senior high and college life. So, to be able to get accepted in a company Nancy built, as Nancy’s personal assistant, is a sweet as fuck dream come true. Y/N didn’t care if she has to go home by 12 A.M. or 1 A.M. as Nancy said PA’s always have to leave the office after their bosses left. Nancy just shows the dedication to work one must have. Y/N didn’t find it tiresome when Nancy has to send her back-and-forth for errands both for work and personal life. She’s learning how to be resourceful while being good at time-management all at the same time. She’s learned a lot from Nancy. So, seeing Min Yoongi be so lax at work after getting hired frayed Y/N’s nerves to no end.

Yoongi doesn’t keep a tab on Nancy’s schedules just like Y/N does. He says there’s no reason for such rush to keep every event on track because Nancy will just cancel or push forward them anyway. It’s true, Nancy does sometimes mess up the week calendar Y/N arranged for her, but still, not tabbing anything on your work diary is still an evident proof Yoongi slacks of. He even takes a nap in between work hours for God’s sake. Yoongi also likes to talk behind Nancy’s back: of how inconveniencing, overbearing, and unnecessarily over-the line abuser she is as a boss. He tells this to Y/N day in and day out. Yoongi even mocked Y/N’s work ethic as a “willing subservience to work slavery.” He mercilessly reduced her dedication to work as blind obedience to an authority for the sake of monthly paychecks instead of hard, honest efforts to learn the essential skills in travel journalism.

And, it’s not a miracle no one finds out about this. Because when Yoongi is indeed caught, he finds one loophole in his and Y/N’s dynamic as co-PA’s for Nancy and implicitly, oh so subtly, turns it around against Y/N. Y/N remembers one time when Nancy berated them two for not inserting her friend Rosa’s son’s first birthday party into the 6 PM slot of one Monday in March. After her long sermon, Yoongi apologized for not encoding it into Nancy’s Schedule Work Sheet. Y/N handles Nancy’s Schedule Work Sheet, not Yoongi. Nancy knows this. So, after her 9-12 shift that same Tuesday, Nancy reminded Y/N of her replaceability in Travel Loca during one of the most tension-filled elevator rides in her life. She went home to her flatmate, Mina, in tears which did not permit her to get an ounce of sleep. Y/N turns up the next day at work, red eyes and red nose close to make Rudolph the reindeer run for his title, only to know from the call logs that Yoongi did not receive Rosa’s call because he was sleeping when Y/N outright told him to take over the phone because she needed a bathroom break.

Min Yoongi is mean and Y/N has seen the last straw of her respectful tolerance to people ticked off by this insufferable man one cursed Thursday night of September.

Thursdays are horrible. It is always assured to be the worst day Y/N will have in a week. Either an investor will change their mind about a deal with Travel Loca, or Nancy will lash out at her because of stress from stupid shenanigans of her rebellious teenage daughter—Thursdays always have it out for Y/N. Y/N can already tell this so when Nancy called for her at 10:30 P.M. to give her a run-down of her schedule for the weekends and the upcoming week. It is already an established routine that Nancy will have Y/N over to her office to give a schedule report at any time of the day. It’s just happened this day that Yoongi took a leave and Y/N shouldered every task to be done, easily wearing her out in the afternoon.

Y/N is close to crying right now because of exhaustion and it does not help that Nancy is wearing a sour face. She does not even look up at Y/N from her laptop when she said, “Tell me this week’s schedule.”

Y/N pulls up her notebook and traces her pen over her notes, “Tomorrow you have an 11 AM meeting with investors from VanTae Apparels. At 1 PM you will have an online meeting with our overseas partners, JM Restaurant Group. We also have to submit the Kim Yuna special feature by 2 PM and at 3 we have the Travel with RM to interview. And–”

“Push the Travel with RM to 2. We’re holding the Yuna feature ‘til next week because Jennie is writing as if she’s still in college.” Nancy presses a hand over her forehead and huffs, “The Writing Department has been consecutively disappointing me with boring, generic articles. Are fresh pieces non-existent nowadays?!”

Y/N looks up, eyes wide, hands sweaty.

Nancy turns back to her laptop, “What else is on my sched?”

“Um, O-on Saturday 4 PM, you are invited to your friend’s, Rica’s baby shower, and for 5, you are invited to Jungsoo’s son’s 1st birthday party. Then Sunday 2 PM is Hana’s sister’s daughter’s 1st birthday party. You are also invited to Nick and Ken’s wedding on Friday and–”

Nancy clicks her tongue, “Cancel them all. I have no time for these parties and meaningless chit-chats that always have these housewives bragging how great their husbands are or their children’s stupid what-nots.”

Y/N nods and slashes through her notes, “Okay.”

“So send them my apologies and give them a $300 gift instead.

“Okay, ma’am.”

Nancy turns her swivel chair to face her, “Did you get my daughter the unpublished sequel of The Swallowing?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Y/N smiles, recalling her last week’s adventure and success. Maybe Nancy’s mood will lighten up if she knew how she accomplished such an impossible task. “I got to grab a copy after weeks of talking with R. Lewis’ manager. Luckily, R. Lewis caught wind that it’s for your daughter. So he agreed to give me the copy. I actually have it right now, let me go back to my table –”

“You don’t have to. Suzie changed her mind. She doesn’t like The Swallowing anymore. Return the copy and get her the unpublished sequel instead of Bird and Foe.”

Y/N’s jaw nearly falls as she stammers, “S-sure, no problem.” Deep inside, Y/N cannot help but think to herself, “Yes, Nancy may be fickle-minded and forgetful of differences in company protocols that intervene with such transactions, but she cannot just disregard my hard work! All the money in my train tickets and brain cells have gone all in the drain for nothing—Okay, calm down, Y/N, this is Nancy. Nancy can help you to write the best articles in no time. This is just training for the real deal—

“Y/N, did you hear me?”

“S-sorry, what?”

“I said, where’s the USB I told you to get from my laptop at our home? I need the files for the JM Restaurant Group.”

Oh shit. The USB. Y/N told Yoongi to get it since he lived nearer to Nancy’s residence in West Street than her. And since, Yoongi’s on leave, the USB is—!

“And first thing in the morning, I want you to go to the Writing Department to get some fresh stories. I do not want to personally see them or else I will be able to fire one whole department in a day.”

At this, Y/N fiddles with her fingers. “Umm, I think I have a story.”

Nancy quirks her brow.

Y/N wrings her hands behind her back. “I-it’s not yet polished and I still have more to cover on–”

“So, you’re already telling me it’s bad before you even pitch a formal proposal –”

Y/N’s eyes widen and she rushes to Nancy. “No! I-it’s about the Write and Backpack Trip Club. The-they’re a club of unpublished writers, usually late 30s, who met on Facebook and decide to travel together to the countries or places their stories are supposed to take place.” Nancy tilts her head and Y/N picks up her tone. Her hands start to quiver with her voice as she says, “People think—people think it’s hopeless. Like, like, they’re wasting their lives on something so trivial instead of focusing on their jobs. But this club gave them a purpose to still reach for their dreams even when people tell them it’s already too late. And I just,” Y/N wipes a stray tear on her cheek–which she doesn’t know if it’s because of her attachment to the club, Nancy’s new orders, or her frustration at Yoongi for leaving all their responsibilities on her–but she sucks them up and breathes out, “I find it really inspiring to have the courage to seek out your purpose when everything in the world is against you.”

Nancy stares at her, brows furrowed. Another drop of tear falls from Y/N’s eyes. Nancy fixes her eyes back on her laptop. “The USB, Y/N, I need it now. A.S.A.P., capiche.”

Wiping her cheeks again, Y/N nods, “Ye-yeah, capiche.”

Y/N could not remember any time she’s rushed out the office as fast as now. Yoongi’s cell is out of reach and nothing is present in Y/N’s mind but to just run out of the building. She needs to clear her mind. She has to think of a solution. She can’t go back to Nancy empty-handed. Nancy’s already unimpressed of her sloppy work for this day, much more at her uncalled emotional breakdown in her office. She will definitely get fired for sure this time.

The cold dry wind hits Y/N’s face the moment she pushes past the large glass doors of the Rockfort Building. The night sky has blackened into dark indigo and the establishments that dot the neighboring grounds of the building have blurred into monotonous dim shops. With just their solar lights left on, the rest of the complex looked like a washed-out commercial center. The only thing that stands out has to be the small mango tree just a meter away from her—the center-piece and quite the only humanizing element of the harsh Rockfort Complex.

Okay, this is great. Y/N always tend to get the best ideas and solutions when she’s standing near this tree. She proved this twice. First, when Nancy demanded her to re-do all their presentations for VanTae Apparel. Y/N managed to slay it by getting inspired by the mangoes and editing the templates to look like nature’s rendition of Van Gogh’s starry night, which happened to be the favorite painting of VanTae’s CEO. And second, when Yoongi messed up Y/N’s schedules for Nancy’s personal events by misnaming each invitation, this mango tree provided her peace to quickly fix everything up before Nancy gets to the office.

Put your thinking cap on, Y/N. What should you do? Should you rush to Nancy’s house now? Oh no, maybe Yoongi already got the USB. Should you go then to Yoongi’s house? Shit, I don’t know his house address—

“Here’s $25, sir. Thank you!”

Y/N freezes. It can’t be.

Y/N turns to her right only for her eyes to land on a man with a familiar jet black mop of hair, standing about two meters before her, talking with a blue-vested delivery man.

No. No. No. NO. Min Yoongi cannot just swoop out of nowhere and sound so chirpy like that while I have to stress over a problem that I DID NOT create. I cannot get fired in a company I’ve spent my life on for two years just because of this man’s unreasonable incompetence!

Fueled by the purest form of aggravation, Y/N stomps ahead and brushes Yoongi’s shoulder, making him turn back to her.

“Oh, hi, Y/N.”

“‘Hi?!’ ‘Hi,’ yourself, Min Yoongi!—"

“Oh my God,” Yoongi rolls his eyes, “she’s Adolf Hitler again.”

“Adolf Hitler?!” Y/N scoffs, “Say it for yourself, Min! You’re Hitler because you’re twisted enough to ruin my career because doing shit in yours is not enough. Where’s Nancy’s USB?!”

“If you’re going to talk about work again, I gotta leave. If you didn’t know, a ‘leave’ is a leave.” He emphasizes the last syllable as he starts to walk toward the street.

Letting common sense knock into her, Y/N momentarily disregards her pride and runs after him. When he rounds the corner of a clothing boutique, she slips by his side and places herself in the middle of the sidewalk, blocking him.

Unlike his usual work attire, Yoongi is clad in a black hoodie and denim ripped jeans, an ensemble that remarkably turned to look horrible in 0.5 seconds just because he’s wearing it. Y/N deduces it’s just Yoongi ruining fashion because he 24/7 looks like an asshole.

“What, are you just gonna stare at me?”

Yoongi’s voice brings Y/N back to her purpose. “No, I’m here to tell you, you forgot to do your job—Nancy wants her USB for JM Restaurant Group right now.”

“Well, I don’t have it, sweetheart. Work hours are already over so practically, I’m in no responsibility to do whatever the fuck Nancy wants,” the man quips back, smiling.

Y/N cannot help but snap. “Why are you even here in Rockfort, then? You didn’t turn up for work and now you’re just casually strolling in front of our building. You didn’t take home at least a quarter of our tasks and dumped everything on my shoulders like an irresponsible, signature free-loader high school groupmate. And now you think it’s okay to tell me ‘sorry, I don’t have the USB’ when I told you yesterday to bring it today?! I cannot believe what an asshole you can be, Yoongi.”

Yoongi raises a hand. “Okay, chill, tiger. To answer your question, I am here because my friends and I hung out at a bar near here. Not that you will understand, of course, considering your whole life revolves around work, work, and work. Ooh, and Nancy,” Yoongi grins. “How can I forget you idolize Nancy? Actually no, you worship her.”

Y/N’s face falls into an indignant scowl, “I do NOT worship Nancy! I respect her. Which you also should do because she employed you, not the other way around. Also, I have friends! Mina is my friend!”

“Correction, Mina is your only friend at work. And she happened to be your flatmate and college buddy first before you both had luck to also be co-workers. So no, your friendship with Mina is out of the equation.”

Y/N opens her mouth to tell him Mina cannot be out of the equation when Yoongi beats her, “And second, how could I be a free-loader? A leave is a leave. Our job description did not say we should also take work home. You are the only one who does that because you’re paranoid. So don’t impose your so-called work ethic, that is actually masked obsession, to me because I am a mentally healthy person. I don’t want to have a stick in my ass like you do.”

Y/N steps closer to Yoongi, making the latter cock a brow at her. “I’m not paranoid, Min. It’s you who is the problem. You don’t take this job seriously. You don’t take on responsibilities like a mature adult. You think you’re so great just because no one told you you suck at something when you were a kid. Well, let me tell you now. You suck at plain human decency, something that should be innate in every people. You’re so high up your ass you think you can just do anything and get away with it and you–”

“If you’re just going to insult me, can you do that tomorrow? My food is getting cold.”

Oh no. Nancy’s USB. Y/N closes her eyes and releases a long sigh. She thinks her eyes already did a 360 by the time she managed to fix her composure. She looks up at the man in front of her, currently giving her an amused look. Y/N’s voice cracks as she says, “Yoongi…This is the only time I will ask a favor from you. Please help me with Nancy’s USB. I just want to end this night and go home peacefully without her chewing my head off further more. So please, please, please, can you just help me for once?”

“Hmm,” Yoongi scratches his chin, “let me think about it first.”

“Yoongi, please!”

“Okay, fine,” Yoongi grimaces, “considering you practically begged to me for dear life, I, as a human with pure soul will help you out despite all the shits you said to me—”

“Just help me out!”

Yoongi slaps your reaching hands, “Stop, I’m not yet done with my speech. Anyway, considering this as a favor, not a request, I expect a return of favor, too.”

“Sure, fine, anything!”

“Okay, I think I may or may not have slipped in Nancy’s USB in my bag,” Yoongi breathes out as he reaches for his black satchel. “Oh yeah, I totally have it,” he says, flashing the orange 32 GB USB in front of you.

What the fuck. All this time-!

“Why didn’t you tell me you already have the USB?!”

Yoongi nearly guffaws, “Didn’t I tell you a “leave” is a leave? Wait, oh my god, you should see yourself, sweetheart. You’re about to pop a vein.”

“Min Yoongi, I fucking hate you!” Y/N snatches the USB from Yoongi’s hand and stomps back to the direction of the Rockfort Building. The man doesn’t seem to go on his own way though because Y/N hears him holler “Same sentiment too, Y/N!”

Y/N doesn’t turn back. She just raises a middle finger up that she’s sure Yoongi will not miss. And he did not, for the man’s faint chuckles only continued.

The travel back up to the 12th floor seems like the longest elevator ride Y/N has ever been on. Every additional second into the constricted metal box feels like a one-second deduction from her own lifetime. So when the elevator doors open to Travel Loca’s floor, the air is immediately knocked off Y/N lungs. But not because of relief. Nancy stands in front of her, bags in hand, and obviously upset.

Y/N quickly steps out of the lift. “Nancy, here! The USB!”

“You took too long. Just e-mail them to me. I have to cram-reading them in the morning anyway because a certain someone forgot to do their job.” Nancy brushes by her shoulder and steps into the elevator. “You know, Y/N, if I’m paying you to make my life easier for me and instead, you’re making it harder, your position in this company is useless.” Nancy presses the button for the parking lot. The doors close in front of Y/N, letting her see the disappointment on Nancy’s face for the last second of the night.

Y/N goes home twenty minutes later, worn out, and ready to sleep the second she reaches her floor. But when she opens the door, Mina’s smiling face greets her, and she immediately rushes to the sofa next to her bestfriend.

“Mina, oh my god, I have so much to tell you.”

“Me, too!” Mina giggles, wrapping her arms around Y/N’s arms, “Can I go first though?”

“Yeah, yeah, sure,” Y/N smiles, fixing her seat.

“Well, remember last week when I told you I finally confessed to Mark?”

“Mark, as in, the café barista Mark Tuan?”

Mina jokingly hits Y/N’s arm, “Yes, what Mark would I be talking about?”

“Sorry, you know how I get so spaced out when I’m tired and groggy. Anyway, what happened?”

“Well, Mark finally said yes!” Mina bursts into a wide grin, arms outstretched in joy. “I finally get to date Mark!”

“Oh my god, I’m so happy for you, Nana,” Y/N engulfs Mina into an embrace, “I can’t believe you’re finally in a relationship! I mean, who would not want to date you? You’re smart, pretty, and funny. The boys have missed out on you for seven long years. And now, there’s finally someone who has eyes and can see what a gem you are. And damn right, Mark would see that. It’s not every day he can have a gorgeous girl court him for six months after getting rejected twice.”

“Oh my god, stop bringing that up!” Mina playfully slaps her back and Y/N chortles.

“Okay, okay, I’m just joking. What I really mean is: Mark is a lucky guy. I’m glad he finally realized what an idiot he will be if he rejects you again for the third time when you’ve been with him through all his problems. He won’t find another beautiful girl willing to ride his motorcycle with him in a huge-ass dress just to help him deliver orders in time. You’re the total package Mina and I’m so happy Mark has realized it.”

“Oh, Y/N, you’re making me blush,” Mina laughs. She sways the both of them in their hug, “Mark has an impossibly high standard to meet now because of you.”

“Mark doesn’t have to meet any standards,” Y/N snickers, “You already drool at his face the moment we enter The Daily Bean.”

Mina detaches herself from Y/N and dramatically places a hand over her chest. “How can you remember that so well and not who Mark is?”

Y/N shrugs, “Because I’m not staring at Mark and eye-fucking him 24/7.”

“Oh my god, I do not!” Mina giggles, making you laugh again as she hugs you tight once more. Mina’s fingers card through your hair as she murmurs “But you do know, Y/N, even if I’m in a relationship now, I’m not gonna leave you alone. Even if Mark will start to occupy the top priority in my life, it doesn’t mean you will lose your spot in the top-pest part of my list. You know you’re still and will forever be my number one, right?” Y/N hums at that, closing her eyes from the head massage Mina is currently giving her. She feels Mina nod, “Right, you should because you’re practically my baby.”

“No, I’m not.”

“Yes, you are! Who would wash the red stain on your pants and underpants in the girl’s CR while you prance around the cubicle only in a top because you bled through your bottoms during your period, much more, on our Christmas Party, other than me?”

Y/N grimaces, “Oh god, you didn’t have to bring that up.”

“You hit right through me when you said I eye-fuck Mark so yeah, eye for an eye, bitch,” Mina cackles as she finally unlatches her arms around her friend. “Anyway, I’m finished with my story of the day. Your turn. What happened tonight?”

Y/N bites her lip, unconsciously easing an inch between her and her bestfriend. Mina is in a good mood today. Y/N doesn’t want to ruin it by ranting off about how horrible Yoongi is again. She knows Mina. She will listen to her rant about another bullshit done by her co-PA and she will also indulge in an insult-fest against the man. That’s just their dynamic: Y/N’s enemy is Mina’s enemy and vice versa. So as Y/N looks at Mina’s smile which doesn’t do much covering up her dark eyes, which have grown from staying up late to wait for her to come home for multiple nights on end, Y/N decides it’s enough negativity for the day.

“It’s nothing, Mina,” Y/N shakes her head, forcing a smile on her face, “just another tiring day from work.”

Mina tilts her head, “Are you sure?”

“Yeah,” Y/N flashes her another smile as she heads for her room, “I’m totally fine. Just tired. Congratulations to you and Mark again.”

“Yeah, thank you,” Mina replies, but the look on her face tells Y/N she’s unconvinced of what she said. Seemingly aware that her friend needed space, Mina turns back the TV. Before Y/N closes her door, she hears Mina chuckle to a punch-line in the airing sitcom.

Y/N flops on her bed face down. If Yoongi didn’t put much of a fight and just handed her Nancy’s USB when he knew he already had it, then maybe this night won’t be so horrible. Y/N would have given Nancy her USB in time, and her boss could have acknowledged it as a peace offering to her unremarkable work performance that day. Y/N would have totally rejoiced with Mina with her full heart into it and not force a smile on her face when such an announcement deserves much more celebration.

Y/N releases a stifled scream into her pillow. Thursdays are really the worst and it’s all Min Yoongi’s fault.

However, what Y/N didn’t expect is that the following week will get much worse. The Writing Department is late in their deadline, causing the online publication of the September issue to be pushed in the first week of October, a big deal late to the releases of their magazine competitors. Thus, Nancy became more pissy and naggy, giving Y/N a cold shoulder for the longest streak in her work life. Nancy became more frigid when Y/N failed to get Nancy the copy of the unpublished sequel of Bird and Foe. Y/N tried her best, she really did. It’s just that the publishers of Russell Park refused to give another copy because they said they cannot give out two unpublished copies at the same time. Of course, this turned out as a lazy excuse to Nancy, making her dump additional workload on Y/N’s already staggering pile. But that was not what made Y/N’s last week of September the worst week she’s ever had. It was Min Yoongi getting promoted as a staff member to the Creatives Team after giving Nancy the unpublished Bird and Foe sequel.

Ringing phones, staff members running to- and fro- the beige faux wood office floor, and the occasional requests for coffee from the break room–Travel Loca is buzzing with life as usual. But not for long though, because the clock hands are currently on 12:49 P.M. At 12:57, it seems everyone on the floor have gone silent. Almost everyone taps their foot against the floor. All eyes were set on the digital wall clock. Some have even glanced on their own wristwatches to check if the wall clock was right. The hands start to move. Everyone gulps.

The hands hit one o’clock. Everyone scrambles off their swivel chairs. Some have bee-lined for the break room. Meanwhile, a huge mass had created a bottle-neck of office workers at Travel Loca’s main door. No one is left on the staff chairs, except for one: Mina Young.

The accountant slides her swivel chair to the left. Her hands meander through her large file cases and when she feels a cold, ribbed metal surface on her index, she smiles. Mina pushes the on-button and immediately, the then-silent office space has now become a replica of her own flat.

“Good morning everyone! Today seems an extra sweet day than yesterday because you know what? I can smell and see the sweet aroma of those dark, chewy chocolates and those pretty pink balloons surrounding our streets. That’s right folks, Valentine’s Day is just around the corner! Which also means–drumroll for me, Alexa–Holidays are about to sweep in! It’s just three weeks to go, folks, note that! So, for our dear, sweet listeners, I hope you already got your hotels booked and your plane tickets ready so you can finally have that amazing buffet, relaxing spa, or a fun tour around places you’ve never been with your very lovable significant others! I’m sure all of you will have that wonderful, exciting, and pleasurable rendezvous away from school, work, and any responsibilities. Just make sure to channel in on our station if you want the best playlist to get you in the mood for some steamy, passionate, and intimate time–”

“Mina, will you turn off that radio?”

The short-haired brunette frowns at her friend, whose also frowning at her. Mina pushes up her glasses on her nose, “Why? You know I always listen to this station during break time. Plus, Nancy is not here.”

“Still, it doesn’t excuse how irritating that DJ sounds.” Y/N rolls her eyes as she plops herself on another swivel chair. “His voice sounds like there are two styrofoams gyrating each other in a sweaty club.”

Mina’s jaw drops as she turns off her portable mini-radio on her desk. She faces Y/N with a frown this time—actually a scowl now. “Kim Seokjin’s voice is like creamy velvet to the ears! Also,” she scrunches her nose in disgust, “you did not just sexualize non-living objects so casually as if you’re not aware that the mental image you’re painting is so disturbing.”

“First off,” Y/N turns to her, swivel chair squeaking in her abrupt movement, “you’re already seeing Mark Tuan for you to have any weird fantasies about Kim Seokjin and his voice or how cute his laugh is when it literally sounds like he’s an old man dying on a choked-out old joke. And second, sexualizing objects is not illegal by law and even if it so, I did NOT sexualize them. They are just the perfect representation of how Seokjin’s voice sounds.”

Mina purses her lips and props her elbow on her desk to cup her face. “Cut to the point, Y/N. Just tell me what is with you today. You barged in furious in here for no reason, threw a fit at the break room, and now you’re ruining lunch by insulting Seokjin for something so trivial.”

“Trivial?! His voice is fucking irritating! Just because he’s handsome does not mean his voice will also sound good on the radio. It’s like listening to a whale dying while making mating calls–”

“The point, Y/N?” Mina cuts you with an unamused look.

You deflate in your seat. “Fine, it’s Min Yoongi. He made it a point that he is more intelligent and capable than me in our 10 AM meeting with Nancy for this month’s spread. Said he knows more about weird facts and trivia about Sweden because I never got to travel outside this fucking country when I damn well know he only uses some advanced search engine to look for info like the computer whiz that he is! I went so many times on his Facebook to know he posts nothing in his wall but his work achievements—and his dog! Of course, if you went outside the country, you will post pictures in your wall, ‘cus social media sites are just platforms masked as an outlet for free expression when we damn well know it’s just a place where you can brag and be not called out for being arrogant. And damn hell, Min Yoongi does not have any out-of-the-country pictures posted there. What only comes close is his picture of that gumbo he said he made—yeah, quotation marks—because it looks too good to be made by his ugly crooked hands and even if it’s got this aesthetic background not expected to come from this fucking country, I still think he just photoshopped it.” Y/N crosses her arms, “Bet that gumbo did not even taste good.”

Mina scrunches her forehead, “Are you the only flawed person Min Yoongi sees? Why does he always have to nitpick every single bit of your work? He just criticized your last week’s report because of your ‘poor articulation.’”

“Right?!” Y/N leans back on her chair. She groans, “I still remember how he sabotaged my files for Nancy’s professional and personal events. Who in their right mind would change the contact names to mythical creatures? Rica’s 2nd baby shower was named ‘Merlin’s Demon Baby’s Party?’ It’s a baby event for God’s sake!” Y/N looks at her friend, “I swear Mina, one day I will get a brain hemorrhage because of Yoongi’s shits.”

Mina winces, “Please don’t. I don’t want to be the one to tell your mother you already died before you even managed to pay your housing loans.”

“Hey! Don’t attack me like that,” Y/N slaps the back of her friend’s chair. Mina, choking on her spit first, erupts into a fit of giggles.

Unfortunately, it seems lunch’s fun will be cut short as Y/N hears Nancy’s megaphone’s speaker start up, “Calling for Y/N to come into my office. A.S.A.P!”

Y/N scrambles from her seat as Mina sees her off with a sad wave. Pushing through Nancy’s glass door, Y/N could see the lines of ridges forming on Nancy’s forehead before the latter can even eye her.

“Y-yes, Ma’am? You called for me?”

Nancy pins her a look, “You’re asking me if I called you? Are you deaf? Did you not understand what I said?”

“Yes!—I-I mean on the understanding part, yes, not about being deaf or something hehe-“

“Y/N,” Nancy clasps her hands on her table, “I called you here because I have something important to tell you.”

Y/N nears her table, pulling up her notebook and pen.

“I need you to work in the Creatives Department for the next two weeks.”

Y/N’s fingers freeze. She looks up at Nancy with eyes as wide as a goldfish. And before she can brain-filter out her words, they’ve already escaped her mouth. “What do you mean I have to be in the Creatives next week? I’m your personal assistant, not Min Yoongi’s!”

“Y/N, I didn’t say you will work for Yoongi. He’s not the head of the Creatives. Steven Spielberg is,” Nancy gives the girl an unamused look, waving her off from her desk. Y/N bites her lip as she takes two steps backward. She didn’t know she’s rushed up too close to Nancy’s table just at the prospect of Yoongi and her working together came from her boss’ lips.

Nancy leans back on her chair, “I know you two have this petty children-in-the-playground fights ever since the start of October last year. I get that your differences are too great to be bridged anytime soon, thus the reason why I grew tired telling you to stop doing your cat and dog thing because I know you two wouldn’t listen anyway. You two just like to bang heads whenever you like—”

“But, it’s Yoongi’s fault-”

Nancy raises a finger, “But, Y/N, this is really important. I will be out-of-the-country for the next three weeks for both some business and family matters. Hence, why I cannot bring you with me as usual. And why I will need you to work under Steven for the meantime: to report to me about any of their progress. The Creatives’ current designs will have us late into this month’s deadline and I do not want this business going down anytime soon because of a weak holiday cover. So, as my PA, you will report everything about their progress to me, and you will report my feedback to them. At the same time, you will tame your childish fights with Yoongi to a minimum so Travel Loca will function as well as it can be while I’m not physically here. Understand?”

Y/N nods, “understand, Ma’am.” She doesn’t have a choice even if she wanted to object. Whatever Nancy dictated is already set in stone.

“Also,” Nancy looks at Y/N, “since I will be off the next three weeks, my schedules for the weeks in my absence will be pushed and packed on the following week. So, I expect you to still work on your station—and work even harder after I came back. Understand?”

More workload? Y/N internally groans. She doesn’t like work getting reduced early into the week then doubling into hell in the latter part of the month. She likes them evened out—everything is balanced, familiar, and predictable. Nevertheless, Y/N only nods, “yes.” “No” doesn’t exist in Nancy’s dictionary.

Nancy returns to her laptop and waves her off, “Okay. Then, capiche.”

“Yes, ma’am, capiche,” Y/N makes a quick bow and scampers out of her boss’ office.

When Y/N reaches her station, she sinks herself into the cushion of her seat. First, Min Yoongi belittles her researching ability in the morning meeting. Then now, she will work with him for the majority of three weeks. After that, another hell will start because of Nancy’s incoming packed schedules.

Y/N’s eyes land on her laptop and she immediately sees her calendar. January 16, 2020. Thursday. Y/N releases an inhumane groan. Of course, the goddamn Thursday curse. When will she ever live?

“When will I ever die?” Y/N sobs into Mina’s shirt. Her friend keeps her arms around her tight as she cards through her hair.

“Hey, don’t think so negative,” Mina coos, “Think of this as an opportunity to finally have Nancy off your back.”

“Yeah, as if working with Min Yoongi is better than that. He already ruins my life when we only physically encounter each other in meetings and breaks and lunches. Imagine working with him for a whole fucking day!”

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry, I take that back,” Mina hugs her friend tighter.

Y/N continues, “And after enduring all that, my workload will quadruple when Nancy comes back after three weeks! I already experienced this during her daughter’s debut last year. When Nancy said a pile of work will come, it fucking means four metal file cases of work. I spent the last two weeks of August plunging myself into an abyss of papers. I did not sleep for two weeks straight! And now— I will have three weeks-worth of hell work to come after spending three weeks working with the personification of Satan. Can the world just eat me up?!”

“Wait, wait, wait, wait,” Mina pulls away to hold her bestfriend at arms-length, “What did you say will happen in three weeks?”

Y/N closes her eyes, “Another hell will come because a shit-pile of work is coming in three weeks! Mina, I’ve been telling you this since morning-”

“Y/N, after three weeks, it’s Valentine’s Day.”

Y/N’s eyes immediately shoot open, “What?”

“Look,” Mina clicks on her phone and flashes Y/N her calendar app. “Today’s January 17. Exactly after three weeks is the Valentine’s week.”

Y/N’s jaw drops ajar, “Oh my god.”

“Yes, Y/N, oh my God. It’s the fucking Heart Holiday.”

“…The country’s long-time problem with their low birth rate has driven the government to build another department that will help its citizens build, manage, and maintain healthy relationships. The Department of Relationship Management was established in 2015, and ever since then, there have been impressive developments in our country’s birth rate. One of the best programs of DRM behind this wonderful growth is the Heart Holiday, the holiday held in the week of Valentine’s Day. It grants any person employed in a private sector one week of paid holiday vacation leave as long as they are currently in a relationship. Meanwhile, education establishments and students are given one week off their academic calendars without regard to their relationship status. Isn’t that sweet? The only downside to that, folks, is that government employees can only have two days of paid holiday leave on the 14th and 15th. But, still, a holiday is still a holiday! So for our lovely listeners, start planning your vacation trips and hangouts! Especially when Cloud 10 Airlines is there to make your holiday week even sweeter with their 70% discount on local trips! Just contact 675-9859 and 568-987—”

“Mina, can you turn off the radio?!”

“Again?!” Mina heaves, “What’s with your aggravation streak these days against Kim Seokjin’s voice?”

“It rattles me,” Y/N half-screams, plopping into the swivel chair next to her friend’s cubicle. “Yesterday, he already announced that goddamn timeline of the DRM and ‘all hailed’ importance of the Heart Holiday. Why does he have to repeat it again today? In that overly-enthusiastic voice, too, as if he’s never read of that script again and again?!”

“Y/N, it’s how broadcasting works. It’s one of the most awaited holidays in the year, so of course, they will nab as many advertisement deals as they can.”

“Well, I don’t like how they work!”

“You cannot just tell a radio company to stop working,” Mina turns in her chair to face her friend, “Also, stop venting your frustration on Seokjin. He doesn’t even know you hate his voice. Routinely doing this noise pollution doesn’t do anything at all. Just tell me what made you upset today.”

“It’s Yoongi!” Y/N scowls. “He won’t explain to me the technical editing terms on Steven’s report for Nancy! He said a five grader can even know what they are. I went through fifth grade, Mina, and I did not freaking know about any photoshop shit!”

“Well, that’s because you’re old.”

Mina looks up and sees Yoongi hovering her cubicle.

Y/N’s scowl deepens, as she turns her chair to the direction of the intruder. “As if you’re any much younger. From what I know, you’re four years older than me, dumbass.”

“Well, at least I know what Steven is talking about,” Yoongi props his chin on Mina’s cubicle.

Y/n rolls her eyes, “Because it’s your freaking line of work! Of course, you’ll know about it!”

“Well, you’re now working most of the time in the Creatives Team and you don’t know it. What does that make you, then? I’ll give you a hint: It’s what you called me three seconds ago. Starts with the letter ‘d’ and ends with the letter ‘s.’”

“What? You think you’re so smart now just because you know that vector-mask-thingy?! News flash, Yoongi, you did not graduate with any Latin honor. I did! So, who’s the real dumbass?!”

“You damn well know Latin honors doesn’t actually have any effect on real life. Practical knowledge has—especially knowledge about terminologies used in digital designing. Which you need because you won’t be able to report anything to your god Nancy. Because, well: You. Don’t. Know. Anything. Like. Always.”

“Min Yoongi, fuck you–”

“Guys, guys, guys, can you stop?”

Y/N gives Yoongi another glare before fixing herself back in her seat. Mina puffs, “Yoongi, can you leave us alone for a while? We’re talking here and you just invited yourself in our conversation.”

Yoongi chides, “Well, tell your friend that if she wants to shit-talk a person just a meter away from her without the said person barging in the conversation, she should keep her voice on the down-low. Not screaming around like a crazy ape.”

Y/N’s jaw drops open, “What crazy ape?! You’re the crazy ape! You look like a fucking gorilla who accidentally get dwarfed by a tooth fairy and-”

“Min Yoongi, just leave us alone,” Mina gives the man a pointed look.

Yoongi shrugs and detaches himself from her cubicle. He heads back to their office but he doesn’t completely leave the room without giving Y/N a middle finger.

Y/N’s mouth drops open in disbelief. She turns to Mina. “See? Isn’t it obvious he just wants to make me the bad man to Nancy again? What kind of person are you to not cooperate with your co-worker like a goddamn adult? I don’t get why no one sees this bitch’s true face but you and me! I just want to freaking tear off his face, make him wipe it in his ass, then place it back on his head since he’s such a literal ass—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Mina clasps a hand over your shoulder, “don’t get too homicidal. What you just said, aside from disturbing, is very disgusting.”

Y/N slumps in her seat and crosses her arms.

Mina sighs. “Okay, yeah, I know, Min Yoongi is the worst. But I don’t want you to do anything stupid so let’s not talk about him for a while, ‘kay?” Y/N nods. Mina leans back in her seat with the nth sigh for the day. “Okay, I got some update from Jaehyun.”

Y/N leans forward. “What did he say?”

Mina gives you a sad smile, “He already has a fiancé.”

“So soon?” Y/N scoffs. “He was just courting me two months ago.”

“Yeah, well he’s getting married this week. Whatever,” Mina waves off, “I don’t like him for you anyway. He dresses like a college fuckboy.”

“Okay, what about Dahyun?”

“Already married.”

Y/N’s eyes widen, “and she didn’t tell us?”

“Yeah, I already nagged her on the phone. She said it all kinda happened too fast–her and Sana. And the marriage was in New York. We’re too broke for out-of-the-country trips to attend anyway if we were informed.” Mina smiles, “She said she’s gonna invite us to the Christening of their baby.”

“Okay, I’m glad she still cared about us. Oh,” Y/N pipes up, “what did Jackson say over the phone?”

Mina gives you a tight smile. “Getting married, too. And guess what, the invitations were already in our mail box when I went to get our bills.”

“Momo?”

“Engaged. She and Heechul just broke out the news a week ago.”

“Sam?”

“Married. And 4 months pregnant.”

“Jongdae?”

“Engaged. Also has a baby in way.”

“Hana?”

“Engaged.”

“Changmin?”

“Engaged.”

“Jaebum?

“Engaaaaaged.”

Y/N throws her hands in the air, “Why is everyone getting married?!”

“Well, we’re in our late 20s. It’s the “marrying age” they say. It got more enphasized when DRM’s programs had succeeded in encouraging hundreds of people to marry in the recent year. Even my mom already expects Mark to propose by next month. We’re just dating for 6 months!” Mina cringes. She pulls Y/N’s chair closer to her to hold her hands. “Y/N, I’m really sorry. It kinda slipped my mind that we always apply together for the Heart Holiday every year. It’s just that Mark and I—”

“Hey, hey, don’t blame yourself. You’ve been pining after Mark for about two years and now look at you—together, stable, and in-love half into the year! I don’t want you to fret having a relationship with the boy you liked for so long.”

“Yeah, Y/N, I know,” Mina closes her eyes. “It’s just sad and unfortunate everyone we know are already in relationships.”

“Yeah…” Y/N nods and the two fall into silence. Why is everyone conveniently in a relationship just in time with the Heart Holiday? What, the whole world suddenly knew the loophole in DRM’s program? Y/N and Mina studied that for a whole year! This is unfair. Y/N cannot be the only single person out there who’ll miserably work in the office while everyone gets to have the time of their lives—wait.

Y/N grabs Mina’s hands. “Hey, Nana, I know we said co-workers are off-limits because Nancy will definitely know it’s a ruse. She’ll block my application form before it can even have the seal from the HR. Especially when she found out our lesbian “relationship” was fake after you and Mark updated your civil statuses.” Mina winces and opens her mouth to apologize again but Y/N cuts her with a finger to her mouth. “Nancy will definitely call me a liar and grill my head if she finds out what we’re planning to do now. But look, Nancy’s out of the country. Teddy is the general supervisor and she’s the next in the hierarchy. We damn well know her 45-year-old heart is soft for some nicely-woven romantic story. Even more, in an office setting—the bane of every middle-aged woman’s sappy romantic heart. So, what do you say?”

Mina lets out an exasperated breath, “That crossed my mind, too, you know. But, Y/N, the thing is—the whole Accounting Department is in a relationship. And the same goes for the Writing, Marketing, Logistics, and HR. All of them are either in a relationship, married, or getting married.”

“What?” Y/N’s eyebrows curve up high, “How come I didn’t know this?”

“Uh, because you’re busy working for Nancy day-in and day-out? Also, I just happen to be friends with Jisoo from HR. She’s in charge of the company’s relationship records. Sometimes, she slips in everyone’s stories while we listen to WWL Radio during break time.”

Y/N bites her lip. This can’t be happening to her. Not now. Not when the most un-objectifiable reason for a break from Nancy is about to slip through her fingers like fine sand.

Mina scratches her nape, “I…may have someone in mind though.”

Y/N’s eyes look straight into Mina’s. “Tell me.”

“Well, the entire Creatives Department is either married or engaged save for one.”

Y/N holds Mina’s hands tighter. “Who?”

“Min, Yoongi.”

Y/N must be going crazy. She thinks she must be growing a nest of vultures in her brain now, the mother routinely picking on her numerous dead brain cells to feed to her young. It doesn’t help that the bags under her eyes have started to droop like a waterfall, forming a sad saddle of grey on her cheeks. She cannot even remember the last time she had a decent meal. All she remembers is the finger foods Mina hands to her station every once in a while.

The universe is being unfair to her and it is all taking a toll on her body. They weren’t kidding when they said adjusting to a new environment is an entire whole work in itself. The Creatives Team runs a completely different routine. Large monitors crammed with multiple editing softwares Y/N cannot understand surround the studio-size office space. There are drafted papers and previous issues scattered in every possible corner, some even gathering dust by the floor-to-ceiling windows. Y/N is not even sure if anyone has re-arranged their desks in the last few months. The Creatives’ work ethic is loosely bound on schedules and everyone seems to be doing everyone else’s job. Except for Y/N, because Steven is the only one willing to share their team’s progress to her. But that alone is not enough for her daily report to Nancy because Steven is always busy in his computer. More unfortunately, everyone is wary of her. Y/N’s sure she even saw Kim Myungsoo clutch their design folders closer to his chest when her eyes glanced at his cubicle.

Sure, Y/N expected everyone will have their guards up on her. Who wouldn’t be when they know Nancy still has eyes on them even if she’s countries away? But still, it doesn’t lessen the pain on Y/N’s self-esteem and the stress on her back. If Y/N can’t get someone to talk to her, she won’t be able to provide a more substantial report to Nancy more than just reading Steven’s printed reports verbatim.

Y/N is desperate to find a workmate to discuss everything happening in the Creatives with her, but unluckily for her, she only has someone she wishes to not even breathe the same air with. Of course, no one in the Creatives wants to talk to her except for Min Yoongi. He’s an insufferable ass who doesn’t know when to shut up. He welcomes Y/N every single day with an annoying “Yo, Y/N” and an unneeded commentary about her outfit, like how yesterday he told her “I know retro is in but I didn’t know grandma blouses are deemed stylish again.” He blabbers about his unnecessarily extensive general knowledge about every South Asian country, even if Y/N countlessly told him she didn’t care. He brags about the cover designs and templates he did in the previous issues, flipping the pages too close in Y/N’s face while he speaks about colors and mixing like Y/N is an imbecile about basic color combinations high school students used in their PowerPoint presentations. Yet despite them all, Yoongi still refuses to explain to her the jargon in Steven’s reports.

Y/N tried her best to keep herself from bursting and giving Yoongi an earful of sense. Yes, everyone knows she does not like Yoongi but Y/N doesn’t want them to know to what extent she can go to express them, afraid of embarrassing herself. But in her defense, three days into the first week without Nancy, Yoongi has gone as far as to chip a small bit off Y/N’s mug in the break room. The mug with the “creative juices” in cursive printed around its body—Mina’s gift from college. Y/N’s patience meter was blasted off the roof. It will be safe to tell that at the end of the day, Y/N has screamed the hell out of Yoongi that everyone can be sure the latter’s ears may have fallen out of his head. Steven was close to reporting to Teddy what just happened. It was just Y/N’s remaining luck that helped her successfully and implicitly begged Steven not to do so by telling him calling Yoongi “a mean, inconsiderate, self-absorbed jerk who should eat his shit because people are what they eat and he is obviously the biggest shit in her life,” is just her “unique” way of expressing co-worker appreciation to the man.

Aside from putting up with Yoongi’s Satanic attitude, Y/N has to endure Nancy’s intermittent calls with her forever pissed voice coming in first thing in the morning until in the late, ungodly hours. And despite Teddy’s patient guidance over Y/N’s “transition” to the Creatives Team, Y/N’s still close to digging a six-feet deep hole in her station. No, not because of Teddy or Nancy. It’s because she poured her remaining effort dedicated for work by spending the entire week going through every staff member of Travel Loca. Y/N thought Mina must have overlooked a face. That it’s possible Jisoo skipped on a detail she told to her friend. But despite learning Lee Minyoung from the Writing Department is going to call it quits to her boyfriend just after Valentine’s, or how Michael Park from Marketing is about to pop the ring to his girlfriend just right on Valentine’s Day, the looming fact Y/N dreads presents itself on January 24, two weeks before Valentine’s: No one else in the office is single but her…and Min Yoongi.

Of course, it didn’t surprise Y/N, Yoongi must be single. With that know-it-all façade and condescending tone wearing you out like a 24/7 walking instruction manual no one even asked for, who would even like to date him? One week with him as a co-worker alone already makes Y/N want to throw herself into the flaming hot pit of the nearest volcano.

But it’s only two more weeks before Valentine’s and Y/N is desperate and desperate times call for desperate measures. Y/N did a last-minute check-up on her and Mina’s lists of contacts—phone, social media, e-mails, everything under the sun—only to come up with nothing. Mina’s “marrying age” theory must be true because everyone, every single one, of their acquaintances are already married or getting married. Y/N then changed up her game. She started to opt for resources she never thought she will ever use in her life: dating apps. Tinder, Bumble, The League, Grindr—name it, Y/N had made every account for every conceivable dating site. She even spent the most of her break time this week hiding her phone beneath her desk and swiping right. But even this last considerable option proved to be pointless as all the replies she received are either honest “sorry, not interested,” rude “you’re no fun,” or out-right salacious “suck my dick.”

This then left Y/N no choice but to consider the most unspeakably horrendously unfortunate option she didn’t even want to have. Min Yoongi is her only choice left. And for that, Y/N spent two days making an elaborate plan. She can’t afford any loose threads or plan-holes that can further make her at the mercy of the infuriating jerk. However, even if she made everything as seamless as it can be, Y/N knows it will be the worst decision she’ll ever make in her life. Mina also expressed the same concern, even apologized for planting that small information about Yoongi in her friend’s mind. But even her friend’s day-by-day discouragement to push through with her plan is not enough to deter Y/N.

Because even if just thinking about the plan makes Y/N feel the world is about to crumble and swallow her down in its unending, fathomless depths; even if it makes her want to set up an appointment with an exorcist, Y/N knew she won’t back out. It’s not viruses or bacteria, it’s a seeded idea that is the most contagious living entity that can take hold of any human being. And the moment Y/N realized there’s no other ticket way out of her dilemma but Yoongi, she knew this thought will haunt her for nights on end.

This is the reason why Y/N’s currently standing by the corner of the Creatives’ office when it’s already 6:46 P.M. while almost everyone has left the office. Almost, because Yoongi, apart from her, is the only one left in the office as Steven requested him to finish a color palette by tonight. Y/N gulps a thick blob of saliva. Sweat runs thick on her forehead. God, if Mina could see what Y/N’s about to do, she will be already by her side, yelling for her to just give up. Y/N shakes her head. This is Mina’s fault anyway. If she didn’t plant the idea in her head, she wouldn’t have to do this. She wouldn’t be creeping behind a door like a disgusting stalker. She wouldn’t be profusely sweating in an air-conditioned room like a guilty murderer. She wouldn’t be-

“What the hell are you doing behind the door?”

Y/N shrieks and jumps a half-foot away from her spot.

“The hell—what’s gotten into you?!” Yoongi frowns, “And why are you even here?”

Y/N’s brows meet together in her forehead. But before she can speak, Yoongi’s snickers drown out the words in her throat.

“Wait, don’t tell me you’ve come as far as spying on my work. I didn’t know you’re going to be this petty,” Yoongi sighs and puts his hand on his waist, “Well, if you think going through my work laptop will get you to understand Steven’s report, I’m sorry to say you won’t get anything, little girl.”

Yes, it’s true. The words did die out in Y/N’s throat. It’s just flames of anger sweeping in the valleys of her mouth. Y/N surges forward, fists clenched tight, “‘Little girl’? I am not a fucking little girl!”

Yoongi grins, “Then what should I call someone who’s a foot smaller than me?”

“What fucking ‘foot’?! We’re just inches apart! Have you ever seen yourself in a mirror? You’re not even that tall!”

“Says the one who’s looking up at me just to level her eyes with mine,” Yoongi raises his brows, “and who’s now standing a little too close to me because apparently, standing a socially-decent foot away won’t enable her to see my face.”

Y/N’s eyes widen and she immediately takes a step back. She doesn’t get how easy it is for Yoongi to rile her up that she instantly forgets how to control her body. When she looks up at him, the man is smirking at her. Her mouth aches to tell him he actually looks stupid with that lopsided smile if he thought doing it will make him a tad bit inch sorry excuse of “sexy.” But then, Y/N remembers she has a purpose tonight. She didn’t just waste an hour waiting in the excruciating office space of the Creatives Team just to get nothing done.

Y/N closes her eyes and breathes out. When she opens them again, she looks at Yoongi in the eyes. “I’m not here to fight with you, Yoongi. I’m here to make an offer.”

Yoongi scoffs, “An offer? You? Are you hearing yourself right now? In case you weren’t informed, I don’t need anything from you. And I didn’t—”

“You’re single right?”

Yoongi gawks at her, “W-what?”

“Well, I’m single, too. And Valentine’s week is coming in two weeks.”

“So?”

Y/N tries not to grit her teeth, “So, that means the Heart Holiday is also coming. Nancy is bound to come back during that time, too, with an obvious incoming large workload to come for me. I can’t afford to hole myself up in this office while everyone gets to enjoy a paid holiday week. And since you have an affinity for disliking your job, I figured you also wouldn’t want to go to work during Valentine’s week.” Y/N crosses her arms, “So I’m here, Min Yoongi, to give you an offer: Fake date me for two weeks to make it to DRM’s PRS’ application deadline. When our application gets approved, we part ways and never speak about what happened in these two weeks. It’s a win-win situation. I don’t get to work during Valentine’s. You also don’t get to work, and we both will still get paid. So, what do you say?”

Yoongi just stares at her. Y/N could feel cold sweat running from her scalp and down to her back. Why is he looking at her like that? Why is he being so silent? Is he about to make fun of her and bring it up to work tomorrow? Oh God, Y/N shouldn’t have even gone through with this plan. This is a bad idea. A bad, bad, bad, idea that should have never been entertained and buried in a trunk of embarrassing memories, never to see the light again—

“I’m in.”

Y/N freezes, “W-what?”

Yoongi takes a step closer to Y/N. He leans forward, closing the distance between their faces into mere six inches. Y/N doesn’t need to crane her head up anymore because this time, their eyes are finally leveled with each other.

Yoongi smiles, “I’m telling you, Y/N, I’m in in your plan.”

Y/N looks at him. She just looks at him. Five seconds have already passed. Yoongi should be laughing in her face right now. But the man did not, and takes a step back away from her. He fixes his satchel on his shoulder and closes the Creatives’ glass door behind him shut. When Yoongi looks back at Y/N, he gives her a shrug, “Hey, if you’re not going home, I am.” He heads for the main door, hands dug into his pockets. Y/N’s eyes just follow his figure. Before Yoongi completely gets out of the office, he hollers, a hand cupping over his mouth, “I said I’m already in in your plan. You can go now. See you tomorrow.” He sends Y/N one last smile.

It takes Y/N five more seconds before she breaks her frozen stance. What did just happen? Yoongi didn’t laugh at her. He didn’t put up a fight. He….agreed? Just like that? This is impossible. This cannot happen! Yoongi doesn’t agree, he argues! Always! And he just doesn’t bid her goodbye and “see you tomorrow.” Yoongi annoys her with one last hit of “goodbye, grandma.” And Yoongi doesn’t smile. He smirks. He just pulls up one side of his lips, squints his eyes, and snorts. Y/N must be going crazy. This is not Yoongi! A whole different man has suddenly appeared before her. This cannot be!

But despite all the things going back and forth in her head right now, there’s only one looming thought on top of them all that had Y/N release a staggered breath:

What the fuck did she just get herself into?

next | series masterlist

Disclaimer: This first chapter is based on Netflix’s Set It Up (2018), particularly Nancy’s briefing scene and the USB scene. Netflix’s Set It Up (2018) is the inspiration for this fic and so I based Ms. Nancy’s personality on Lucy Liu’s portrayal of Kirsten Stevens! Ms. Lucy Liu was fantastic in her performance! That being said, all scenes and references from the movie used in this story are the property of its respective owners. The rest belongs to the author. This work is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement is intended. Anyways, if you wish to watch the movie, don’t worry about encountering any spoilers in this fic!

A/N pt. 2: Hi hons! I decided to cut this fic into parts as this will be very long (hello banter dialogues). Writing a 25+k wordcount (so far, this is my assumed final wordcount) may overwhelm a lot of readers and make them not want to read this anymore ☹ Anyway, the succeeding parts will be released soon as I already have a detailed storyboard and outline for this mini-series so you don’t have to wait that long. Thank you for giving this fic a chance, hons. Also, feedback is more than appreciated. Tell me what you guys think! ♡♡♡ \(> u

Taglist: @fangirls94 @ditttiii @chogiyeol-utopia

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a-life-lesson-in-submission · 3 years ago

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Inside a Submissives Soul

Dear Diary -

I am often asking myself whether I write too little about this journey. There is much more going on than what I have wrote previously. Some things, like the exchange of emails between myself and Sir M I tend to re-read in my quiet moments. They're very personal, educational, refreshing and amusing all at the same time, it is very much a blessing to have such open communication. I am a fairly simple being in terms of what I need to feel wanted by someone. The complexity comes with the rest in time, I find I am having to do alot of self talk to make sense of my emotions and keep them realistic but it can be incredibly hard. Sometimes I feel I just need to hear the right thing to help my insecurities settle but it has to be meant.

Some things are better kept to myself and strictly between myself and Sir M, however some things I do overthink and to an extent fear, as I do not want it to impact negatively on our relationship. One day I will find out what is too much and too little I am sure...

Met with Sir M again, I was completely wired, so excited to see him, I didn't shut up rambling. His poor ears must have felt like hot pokers were being pushed through them. I like that we can talk about anything and everything, it's natural and comforting to have such a connection. No awkwardness, even if it is silent, it isn't awkward.

Saying hello with affection brings such warmth to our meetings. Feeling his kisses against mine, feeling him against me. I ache for him as it is, then when he is actually infront of me the ache deepens further. He is irresistible to me.

I feel incredibly self conscious yet again, my skin has flared up everywhere and I feel embarrassed by it. I don't know what he says or what he does but it vanishes quickly and I feel less concerned as we get closer.

With his guided tone he tells me we may not always have sessions filled with play, sometimes just being with one another, to talk, to relax, to communicate freely is equally important. This is very reassuring, we are only human after all, we all have off days.

A very short time passes and I lose my top and bottoms. He took his time with the bottoms, enjoying himself, they sat at my knees, a very slight movement from me and they dropped to the floor. He assumed I had done it on purpose, playfully I said I hadn't, I couldn't stop grinning which gave it all away. He turns me to face away from him, he only has to show slight guidance with his hands for me to follow through. My hands up and away, peaches pushed out towards him, he remains seated, just underwear to cover my intimate areas, he begins with the spanking and I can't help but smile.

When he stands, I feel his hands all over, teasing, caressing, damn he feels good. I can never help but to push against him, taunting him to play further. He resists very well. I am now to lean over, arms infront of me, he removes the clasps on my bra, off it comes, panties stay on, his fingers feel me through the fabric. He disappears for a moment, I know he's there, he returns, pulling my panties to one side with a cool feeling on his fingers. This always makes my body jolt, something surges through me head to toe, my natural reaction is to flinch. He finds this amusing, I'll get him back one day I'm sure.

He probes between my peaches, the feeling is fantastic. I feel him planting kisses on my body here and there, subtle touches to make me tingle even more. He leans in with his almost whispered words, I am a bad girl... I have 2 fingers between my peaches... All I can do is smile and push back alittle.

I always seem to lose my voice, when he works his magic, I am gone, somewhere I want to stay for eternity. It doesn't take much my mental state to get this way when I am with him, he doesn't need to touch my sensitive areas for me to feel this way either, it just happens.

Remaining in position, which I don't think was for long, I move a foot and realise from my knees down, they are numb. I tell him this, I know pins and needles followed by cramp isn't far behind. He has me sit and begins massaging my feet and lower legs, he stopped the cramp from occurring, such a gent. Very much like no other.

On regaining feeling, he asks me to kneel, I am not on the ground so I am almost level with him. The flogger comes out against my front, it doesn't hurt, he is fairly gentle, a couple of strikes grab my attention at times but I enjoy it nontheless, somewhat relaxed by it.

He stops and comes to pull my panties down, just under my thighs, continuing to rub and probe around. I am melting from the inside out. He applies a firm grip around my throat, my insides churn and I feel myself blurring the more he plays. Asking, more than demanding me to cum. Just the way he says it, gawd I wish I could, it's there, I'm ready but she will not release. It is infuriating beyond anything I've ever known. I've waited all week for this (years to be more specific), and it just sits there, hovering around in the background. It's so close. I feel desperate. I want to. I need to.

He doesn't give up easily, spends quite alot of time on me, this alone is bewildering, I have never received such attention to this extent. I am told to lean over, I do, he continues. His fingers are magical, I tense, I relax, I ache inside, I breathe heavier, I moan and groan. I am eager to release but to no avail, it doesn't happen. I am cursing myself, cursing her. I deliberately saved myself and this is how she repays me.

He slows his pace and stops briefly to tell me his is getting the big guns out... the wand... As per his request, I turn around, lose the panties then onto my back. Open to him, he wastes no time and sticks the wand to the most sensitive parts of me. The sheer intensity I feel, it is almost impossible for me to contain any form of control of my senses, my hands are automatically drawn in to attempt and adjust. Of course, I am not to touch, I clench my fists, he then places my hands on my stomach, holding them there for a moment. As my body alternates between tensing and relaxing, it takes time even though I felt it would be immediate, I finally have a release. My body arched, curved, the grip of my fists tightened. Such a bugger, he doesn't stop, I writhe, I squirm, I breathe, I twitch and shake but he keeps going, the unbearable bliss. One rolls into another, then another.

When he comes to a stop. I know he's there. I felt so high, I couldn't think, I couldn't move, I just was. My thought processes stopped, I knew I was alive, I was just being. He is leaning over me, monitoring me. He observes me a lot, a kick for him but also to look after me. My eyes meet his, they're beautiful, they say so much, I only wish I could read them and his thoughts. I remember touching his face, my hands on him. It brings comfort and let's me know he is real, that it isn't all just a vivid dream. I always want my hands on him, the contact brings me closer emotionally. I don't ever recall being that high, I felt drunk, grinning ear to ear, total mush. It was quite a while, we must have lost quite some time before I came about and became aware of my surroundings.

When I am somewhere back on planet earth, I am somewhat able to maintain conversation, although there must have been occasions where I made no sense because he said as much. We talk about anything and everything, so natural, so open. How we made the conversation get to the point it did, I tell him where I place the wand when I am alone, it doesn't even touch my sensitives, it sits just above and I can roll out a few releases as a result. He is interested and grabs the wand again to trial and sample. Starting where I would start, he then explores further finding my most intimate part which is covered by my natural being. My word, I nearly hit the roof. His words 'this one is mine', he damn well sure got it. Wow... back to the world of mush and no senses about myself. I hover there again for some time.

Reality finds its way back to me and our time is coming to a close once more. This is the part I wish didn't come, I wish it didn't have to end. On the other hand, absence makes the heart grow fonder. I was concerned that he hadn't had any physical intimacy of his own, he reminds and reassures me he does not need it and gets much satisfaction from seeing my satisfaction. I understand, I don't need a release either necessarily to have a good time. It doesn't mean I don't want to at least give him some physical indulgence in some way.

It took me a lifetime to get myself together, I just wanted to be with him, touching, holding. Part of me didn't want to although I knew I had to. I enjoyed teasing him alittle, making it known despite the releases, I still craved him massively. Instead of him "grrr'ing", I was very much "grrr'ing". Sir M wanted to concentrate on me releasing, he would like me to get relaxed to the point I will on command, to a point I can completely control them. His self restraint is admirable, honourable, above all, it shows he cares. I really cannot wait for the day I finally have no doors, no walls, no barriers. My subconscious plays a massive part in holding me back and although he doesn't see it as an issue, it still frustrates me. I hope he is right that it will come, just to give myself time. I've had over a decade of time, I genuinely expected myself to implode, then explode and not stop. I want to seize and soak up every moment with him I possibly can. I never want this to stop. I don't want anyone else, just him. To belong to one another, like no other, is all I want, it's all I need.

As always Sir M is right in his explanations and expectations. It is all very new, performance anxiety is a real thing and we don't need to be so hard on ourselves about it. Yes we are playing but we are also building on the 10 year foundation we have been lucky to have, these things take time. Small steps, we can take plenty of them.

I felt incredibly cheeky with my attitude, so wired being excited to see him again and he knows it. I'm sure I will pay for it later, I did apologise for this and my neediness, he says its not really something to apologise for.

Sir M, ever the gentleman. Unique, 'rare and impossible'...

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sourcherrybomb · 4 years ago

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SoKai Week 2020 - Day 2 - For ____ Eyes Only

Synopsis: During the time period Kairi was within Sora’s heart, she kept a handy mental diary of all the places and people she encountered. Let’s take a peek at it, shall we?

Sneak Peek: I’ve been in Sora’s heart for a little bit as of now. It’s a nice kind of… warm, if that makes sense. Like a perfect sunny day on the Islands. Knowing what kind of person Sora is, it’s unsurprising.

Tags: Light Romance, Adventure, Comedy, All Ages, F/M

Prompt for the Day: First Meeting / Unseen Adventures

Words: 3.5k

Fanart By: @softpinkbee

Entry 1: Welcome to Sora’s Heart. Population: 1 (I think)

Sooo… This is a thing that’s happening. All because of a stupid, literal world ending storm.

Oh wait, aren’t I supposed to start with “Dear Diary”? Not like I’m physically writing in a journal since I don’t have a body anymore… Ugh, Sora and Riku would probably poke fun at me if they found out that I kept one. Well sorry that I like to be sentimental and have a way of remembering and planning our future adventures, lazy bums.

I’m getting ahead of myself, aren’t I? I’ll do this once to get it over with.

Hello there (mental) diary, my name is Kairi! I’m 14 years old and I lived on the Destiny Islands before I somehow ended up in Sora’s (my BFF and lazy bum #1) heart. That little mishap took place right after I met this weird old guy in brown robes in our Secret Place. I don’t know where Riku (my other BFF and lazy bum #2) ended up, but somehow Sora got sucked into a black hole that sent him… Or is it us? To another world called Traverse Town.

I mean the boys and I always planned to travel to other worlds, just not like this. We were supposed to travel by raft, I was supposed to have a body, and it was going to be all three of us… Okay maybe I asked Sora if he wanted to go alone with me, only to end up chickening out at the last moment, but this current situation is not what I had in mind!

Apparently these monsters called the Heartless destroyed our world, sending us to Traverse Town. I feel bad.

Sora was lost and alone. I knew because I felt it in his heart.

Luckily, Sora has met a lot of new people since arriving. There were these two girls, Aerith and Yuffie, that I would have loved to talk and meet with. Selphie definitely would have loved to meet Aerith, she was so pretty! Besides them, Sora also met this edgy guy named Leon (who kicked his butt) and a cranky old mechanic named Cid. More importantly, Sora met this talking duck and dog named Donald and Goofy. They’re pretty entertaining, so I hope they can keep Sora company since I can’t speak to him and we lost Riku.

I’ve been in Sora’s heart for a little bit as of now. It’s a nice kind of… warm, if that makes sense. Like a perfect sunny day on the Islands. Knowing what kind of person Sora is, it's unsurprising.

I just can’t shake off the feeling that there’s something… no, someone else in here.

Entry 2: Topsy? Turvy? Definitely Crazy.

Is it possible to have an out-of-body experience and a fever dream at the same time? Because that’s what Wonderland feels like.

Geez, where do I even start with this one? I guess with the talking rabbit entering the talking doorknob? Granted that rabbit was kind of cute, if not panicky. I could get used to that. Sora shrinking and entering a place full of playing card soldiers and a cat with a decapitated head (I think? He reattached it) are things that are going to take a bit to get used to.

Gosh, that feels like the understatement of the century.

I knew other worlds would be different than the islands. It’s just that going from a quiet city to a place where gravity is bonkers and playing cards can kill a person makes a girl really question what’s out there.

I wish I could take pictures so people would believe my words. Luckily this cricket named Jiminy has a journal where he keeps track of Sora’s journey. He stays safe inside Sora’s hood, so it’s sort of like we’re neighbors and journal buddies! I’d love to give him my point of view on things once I get my body back.

Oh one other thing before I forget, there was this one girl named Alice. I don’t know why, but she was giving off this really familiar aura. I couldn’t help but feel oddly drawn to her.

I feel like this won’t be the first time we come into contact with her.

Entry 3: Anyone else hear horns?

Like seriously, Sora and I both hear horns coming from this world, but neither of us have any idea as to where they’re coming from. This (extremely small) world is the Olympus Coliseum.

Sora, Donald, and Goofy got thrown into some challenges and ended up fighting waves of Heartless. Really makes me think about how I should have tried sword fighting with Sora and Riku. Sure, I’ve picked up some things by just watching them, but I think actually practicing with them would have helped me in the long run. I mean, I totally could have fought off that weird guy in the brown robes.

Ugh, just thinking about him gives me bad vibes.

Going back to the challenges, Sora totally got his butt handed to him by this guy, Cloud. It was way worse than the loss Sora took against Leon, I don’t think Cloud was holding back.

I’m thankful he didn’t finish Sora off. Partly because he’s my best friend, but also because if Sora bites the dust, then I’m also gone. It was rough seeing Sora lose again, but watching him take out a giant three-headed dog right after certainly was a sight. Although I swear I heard Hercules whisper to his little red friend, Phil, next to him that he weakened the monster.

Maybe. But since it felt like I was fighting alongside him, I’m not ready to count Sora out just yet. He’s grown so much stronger day after day.

Entry 4: Note to Self, Never Let Sora Drive

You know, if the three of us did leave on that raft as planned, I always had a feeling that Sora might fight with Riku over where to take us. Sora’s never been one for his directional skills, that was always more Riku’s forte. Because of this, I always mentally prepared myself for the event where Sora would get us super lost.

WHAT I DIDN’T MENTALLY PREPARE MYSELF WAS FOR SORA TO CAUSE A GIANT SPACESHIP TO CRASH BECAUSE HE ARGUED WITH A TALKING DUCK!!!

That’s not even where it ends! This Deep Jungle is nuts! There’s a leopard that’ll attack you like every five steps, there was a giant Heartless that turned invisible, and Sora even got a gun fired at it! Granted that last one was because of some hunter jerk with a stupid mustache, but if he’s from this world, he’s part of the problem.

The only saving grace was the fact that there are giant tree trunks that act like slides and as many vines to swing on as I wanted to. Tarzan has got to give me some tips when I have the chance to meet him, it was like he was flying through the trees! I’d honestly enjoy the chance to talk to Jane myself as well. She seems so smart and would have so much to talk about. I think she’d make pleasant conversation. That being said, when she showed Sora a picture of a castle in the slideshow, I couldn’t shake this sense of… familiarity. Like I had seen it or something like it before. But where…?

Even though this world and I got off on the wrong foot, once I get my body back, I’m definitely making Sora bring me here so I can do all that!

Although I still have no idea how that’s gonna happen.

Entry 5: I don’t know why, but this place feels oddly familiar

Today may have just been one of the best days I’ve had since I’ve been living in Hotel Sora’s Heart, over here!

For starters, dogs. Sooooo many dogs! Leon told Sora about all of these Dalmatian puppies that got scattered across the various worlds. They’ve been taking the time to rescue all 101 of them, and they’re absolutely adorable! Ahhhhhh, I can only imagine playing with everyone one of them.

Secondly, I’m finding Traverse Town a lot more comforting than I originally did. Something about the tall building walls makes me feel nostalgic. I never was from the Islands to begin with, but where I originally came from is a mystery to me. I don’t think it was Traverse Town, but maybe it was another city. I’m sure that in travelling to other worlds, I might be able to remember more!

Today I even got to talk to Sora a little bit, albeit by accident, when he and his friends wandered into this old tower. I looked around and said to myself that it reminds me of the Secret Place, all dark and surrounded by stone. I never expected Sora to hear or see me! I had so much more to say, but when this wizard guy showed up, Sora couldn’t hear me anymore.

But that’s not even the best news: Right after, Sora ended up running into Riku! He’s safe! It was brief, Riku ended up disappearing moments after, but now we know he’s out there and can protect himself. Sora was even able to protect Riku from one of the Heartless!

Never thought I’d see that day where the roles were switched. It suits Sora.

Entry 6: I hate sand.

I may find not having a body to be a major inconvenience, but for once I’m quite pleased at the fact considering Agrabah, the world Sora and his friends just left, was full of sand.

At its worst, sand was rough, coarse, and irritating. It already got into my clothes back on the Islands, but around here I’d imagine it gets everywhere.

That being said, this world has got to be one of the most adventurous we’ve been to so far! Desert temples filled with treasure, magical genies, all in a faraway kingdom? It’s like all the games Sora, Riku, and I used to play when we were younger. If only Riku joined with Sora back in Traverse Town, he would have loved this!

One odd thing though, we ran into another woman, Princess Jasmine, who gave me the same vibes as Alice! Turns out she’s more than just a regular old princess, but one with special powers. I wonder what it could all mean...

Entry 7: Did you know that the stomach would eat itself without the mucus lining its walls?

Back on the Islands when Sora, Riku, and I made plans to leave on the raft, we always wondered what kind of animals we’d see. The one that would always pop into our minds was a whale since they might be big enough to swallow us whole.

We always laughed it off and went back to working or playing, so actually getting swallowed whole by one feels very ironic. It’s a lot grosser than I thought it would be. Smells like fish everywhere you go, so I really hope Sora, Donald, and Goofy take some showers once they leave.

This whale named Monstro even swallowed this old man and his son, Gepetto and Pinnochio. The latter is somehow a walking, talking puppet!

But what’s even crazier is that out of all the worlds, Riku shows up here, only to kidnap Pinnochio! And not just that, I think he knows where my body is. Geez, Riku was being a real jerk about it, though. Said that Sora was fooling around and not helping, when I know for a fact that he’s doing more that Riku has! I mean, I’m in the guy’s heart, that’s gotta count for something!

I wish I could tell Riku that all this time, Sora has been protecting me. I know I give him a hard time every now and then, but out of all the people in the world, I’m really glad I ended up in his heart.

Entry 8: Rival Redhead Acquired

I know that my last entries make me seem like a jealous person, but mental diary, trust me when I say that I’m not usually one to be envious of others.

Until now.

Being in Sora’s heart, I sort of get a feel for his emotions. By all means, even without being inside him, Sora is pretty much an open book to begin with. It’s just that in being directly connected to his heart, I can feel almost every emotion he has. That includes the mess of emotions he felt when he came into contact with this mermaid named Ariel.

Yup, a mermaid. Atlantica is full of them.

It’s a pretty cool world! There are sunken pirate ships, an underwater kingdom, even a giant sea witch that Sora defeated! But nope, the thing that makes Sora’s heart flutter is another red head when he already has one right here! Ughhh, I’m really glad this diary isn’t physical, I might die if Sora or Riku ever found out I think stuff like this.

Still, Ariel isn’t a bad person so it’s not that I dislike her. She also loves adventure and wants to see other worlds. Moving past my jealousy, I think I’d love to be friends with her some day. Ariel and I are similar, but I think I at least have something over her.

Sometimes when Sora talks about me, he gets this squeezing feeling in his heart. Now I’m not gonna let Sora or Riku tease me over my feelings, I’m sure gonna tease Sora about his once I get my body back.

Entry 9: A lot more tricks than treats!

Halloween has always been one of my favorite holidays. I enjoy going around to houses and getting candy, but I enjoy scaring Sora even more so. I mean, I definitely did that outside of Halloween, it’s just that the holiday made it feel special.

Needless to say, Sora finding a world exclusively dedicated to it is probably one of the best things I’ve ever found out! When Sora, Donald, and Goofy arrived, they even got special outfits to blend in! With Sora being a vampire, I could see Riku being a werewolf, but when it comes to me, I can’t choose between being a witch or a scarecrow.

There are even monsters! There was a talking skeleton who was surprisingly nice, a mad doctor, and a giant living sack of bugs! (It was super gross when he was defeated.) Sora got a bit squirmy when he died, so I really wish I was there to double down and make Sora sora yell out loud!

I definitely want to go to Halloween Town when all of this is said and done.

Entry 10: I miss candy…

So Halloween Town was fun for the thrills and chills, but felt severely lacking in candy. I may be a disembodied heart without a body, but my heart aches for something sweet! Which is why the 100 Acre Wood was torture for me.

Pooh Bear and I would get along. He loves honey, I love candy, it’s like we’re two peas in a pod. I too would probably get myself stuck inside a tree if I was desperate enough for a sweet snack.

Pooh’s other animal friends are all so cuddly and adorable! Out of the cutest, I’d have trouble choosing between Piglet or Roo. Tigger reminds me of the stuffed animals I keep in my room. Part of me really wants to hold onto him and see if he can bounce around with me on it, like a pogo stick! When it comes to Eeyore, in all honesty I kind of just want to give him a hug...

Honestly this place is a nice change of pace. No Heartless to be found, it’s always a clear and sunny day out. When it’s night time there aren’t any clouds so you can see all the stars in the sky. I remember all the stories that Sora used to tell me about the constellations instead of learning how to find his way with them. That was more Riku’s job.

I’m glad to know that what I’m feeling when I look up at the sky, Sora is feeling the same. Take your time and relax, you’ve earned it.

Entry 11: It’s a bird! It’s a plane! No, it’s Sora, Donald, and Goofy!

Forget swinging through trees, forget playing with countless puppies, and forget scaring Sora, when I get my body back, I’m making Sora take me to Neverland so I can fly up high in the skies!

Wait no Kairi, focus, there are more pressing things at matter. Mainly, Riku has become a full on jerk, has sided with the Heartless, and is dragging my lifeless body around with him! I mean, my eyes were open, but my body was basically a ragdoll without me in it. I mean on the brightside, Sora was absolutely brimming with joy when he realized my body was safe.

That may or may not have made me feel an indescribable amount of joy and embarrassment, mind you.

I mentioned having an out of body experience in Wonderland, but having a literal one felt even weirder. When Sora got close enough it was possible for me to twitch my hand a little, sort of like I was reconnecting with my body. Sucks that it ended up being dragged away, I was this close to getting it back. What sucks even more is that Riku ended up fleeing to this Hollow Bastion place with it.

Still it wasn’t all bad. Body or not, I was still able to fly around with Sora. He doubted that I’d believe him if he told me.

I don’t think he’d believe me if I told him what I’ve been up to in his heart.

Entry 12: Riku…

I’m back in my body. I wish it was as simple as Sora making contact with it, but things took a turn for the worse this time around.

I need to start from the beginning.

Right before we reached Hollow Bastion, Sora was able to connect with me. He awoke a memory of mine that I’d long forgotten since I came to the island: my favorite story that my grandmother would always tell me. Remembering it gave me this warm feeling, one that intensified when we arrived at Hollow Bastion.

Only to have that feeling crushed when Riku took the Keyblade from Sora.

I’m glad Sora was able to get it back and knock some sense into Riku, but for a moment Sora really felt at his lowest. Sora was able to become his old self again, but deep in his heart was so much hurt at the fact that he lost Riku to the darkness. Not just any darkness, but from this man named Ansem. He was the one who revealed I was inside Sora’s heart. Sora was able to beat the possessed Riku, but in the end he made a sacrifice I don’t think I could ever pay him back for.

Losing Sora in my arms made me feel even more useless than I did while I was inside his heart. Interestingly enough, when my heart left Sora’s body, I felt another leave as well. It wasn’t like Sora’s heart, but certainly had similar vibes to it.

Regardless, somehow I was able to bring him back from being a Heartless, but the feeling of losing him in my arms like that is something I don’t want to experience again.

We ended up leaving Hollow Bastion shortly after that. When Sora and I were alone, I was finally able to tell Sora that I was with him the entire time. I had so much I wanted to tell him, but there wasn’t enough time in the world. Not to mention all the unfinished business we had back at Hollow Bastion. I wanted to come with Sora, but he was right. It is dangerous, and as much as I didn’t want to admit it, I didn’t really have any ways to protect myself...

I gave Sora my lucky charm. Wherever he goes, I’ll be there with him.

At least, that’s what I keep telling myself.

Entry 13: For Our Eyes Only

Hi there diary, this might be the last time I update this formerly mental journal.

Sora’s gone off on another adventure to save Riku. He saved all of the worlds, but wasn’t able to save his best friend. If I was in Sora’s shoes, which I might as well have been, I would have done the same thing for either of them. As for me, I’m back on the islands safe and sound. Part of me wanted to jump across the darkness and into Sora’s arms once more. But after fighting for so long to keep me safe, I think the best I can do for Sora is to let this one wish come true.

I know he’ll come back for me. After all, he still needs to give me back my lucky charm. And when he does, I’ll make sure to give him this handwritten diary to help him understand just exactly what I went through on this adventure. No…

Our adventure.

---

When I started this fic, I was honestly thinking about dropping it and starting from scratch with a new idea. Quite frankly, I’m glad I decided to keep at it. I’m pretty proud of the result and feel that I’ve made a somewhat creative little oneshot!

Once again, thank you to the Sokai: Destined Oath Discord server for introducing me to SoKai Week 2020! Special thanks to the server member Gee for acting as my Beta Reader.

Thanks for Reading!

#sokai #sokaiweek #sokaiweek2020 #day 2 #kingdom hearts fanfiction #sora #kairi #fanfiction #oneshot #F/M #sourcherrybomb

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scripttorture · 5 years ago

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Hi, how are you? I hope you're having a great day. If it's not too much to ask, I read the articles you linked about child soldiers, and they were very helpful, but not exactly what I'm looking for.. Do you happen to have links of first account stories or diaries of child soldiers? Two lead characters in my wip have been child soldiers in multiple wars in their country. (The setting is light fantasy, think non-European medieval times) (Child soldiers ask/1)

(Childsoldiers ask/2) Theyserved their country, and outside of war time, they received militaryeducation but were under significantly less pressure and stress, sowhile they never felt patriotic toward their country, they didn’tfind a reason to leave yet. That is until they turned 15-16 and wereforced to fight in the front field, where they saw the brutality oftheir own country by themselves, they tried to escape right then andthere, – (Child soldiers ask/3)–but were Captured by the enemy and spent a few weeks doing forcedlabor in an enclosed camp, before they were sold into slavery andbecame house slaves for a nobleman of their country’s enemies. Theymake friends with a slave there, who with a story of his own, hastried multiple times to escape but was always captured, punished(whipped), and forced to work right away. (Child soldiers ask/4)Theyfinally escape when the nobleman’s child bride kills him on the veryfirst night and joins them in a long escape out of the country,before they were rescued by the other slave’s friends. The storydoesn’t go too far in terms of time span, they don’t finish a year inslavery and then after that they help out (but don’t participate inbattle) in another war, before the story ends, maybe another 6months. (Child soldiers ask/6)Sowhile I have the elements of their rehabilitation into the peacefulcivilian life completed, I’d like more in-depth information about howthey would personally feel in that situation. The girl feels a lot ofshame for leaving her country, but has no wishes to return until theyfix the system, while the boy absolutely hates it and – (Childsoldiers ask/7)–onlyfeels resentment for it because of the abuse he suffered, but that’sonly after they learn what normal children their age should be doingand how they’re treated. Symptoms of anxiety and PTSD are prominentin their lives, but should I add more? And would the abuse the boysuffered from be counted as torture? I know this is long so thanks inadvance for your patience :) (Child soldiers ask/8)

I don’t think you will find the kind of in-depth first hand accounts you’re looking for without paying for them. That said there are books by former child soldiers that might fit.

I’m not aware of any diaries, most of these books were written years or decades after the fighting stopped. On a basic level I’m not sure many children that young keep a regular diary and many adult diarists have found it impossible to keep one going through a war.

This is a research book based on interviews with child soldiers that I’m ordering (M Wessel’s Child Soldiers: From Violence to Protection). This one is a first hand account, I Beah A Long Way Gone. There’s also E Jal’s War Child: A Child Soldier’s Story. Girl Soldier co authored by G Akallo and F J H McDonnell might also be useful, it draws heavily on Akallo’s experience as a child soldier. Child Soldier by C Keitetsi may also be useful.

I have not read any of these first hand accounts. I find it… telling that all of the detailed first hand accounts I can find in English are by Africans. The difficulty finding accounts from European and Asian child soldiers may reflect a bias in the publishing industry, or simply one in the search engine I’m using.

Searching for the Khmer Rogue, recent conflicts in the Balkans and memoirs from Poland during world war two will probably all bring up more memoirs from child soldiers. However those available for free may be shorter and vaguer, while more detailed memoirs may be untranslated.

You can also find accounts by using Amnesty International’s search function. There are 171 results relating to child soldiers. I have not read all of them and Amnesty’s interviews tend to be on the short side but these do contain useful first hand accounts.

In terms of whether the characters ‘count’ as survivors- I think it’s important to remember that we’re talking about a purely legal distinction and I think you could argue the case either way.

The UN declaration against torture says that to be torture something must cause severe pain or suffering. But it explicitly says that need not be physical. Something that is intended to cause mental distress (desecration of corpses or religious sites, forcing Hindus to eat beef or Muslims to eat pork, etc) can be defined as torture.

I think that the systematic exploitation and bullying of a child by armed forces could count under modern law.

However there’s no indication in this that these soldiers have been ordered to bully this child or that they’re doing it for one of the four very well defined motivations the UN declaration outlines.

But the argument about whether it meets the strict legal definition seems like a distraction from the real question here which seems to be: ‘how traumatising is this scenario? Is the symptom level appropriate?’

I think it could be however it’s unclear to me whether the characters are both suffering from PTSD and anxiety or whether one has PTSD and the other anxiety.

I don’t think it’s a good idea to give all the survivors in your story the same symptoms. There is variety in survivors in real life. If you’re writing multiple survivors in the same story then it’s important to try and reflect that variety.

Two symptoms seems like a perfectly reasonable level for the girl to me. It could also work for the boy. But personally if I was writing this scenario and trying to put forward the idea that the boy has lived through more I would give him more symptoms as well. If you are trying to establish something as ‘worse’ in the narrative then you should be prepared to back that up with consequences for the characters.

The slave character, who has been tortured and forced to work for a relatively long time, should definitely have more then two symptoms. I think something more in the range of 3-5 would be appropriate.

I get the impression from the other asks you’ve sent that you tend to consistently underestimate symptoms.

Try not to look at symptoms as flaws or limiting factors on your characters. They are not things that you have to struggle to reduce.

Try instead to think of them as opportunities for you, the author.

Disability and mental illness should not be an insurmountable barrier to the plot. Because it is not an insurmountable barrier in most people’s lives.

These things do create difficulties and problems, often problems that are socially constructed. But people who live with disabilities and mental illness find ways around these problems every day. This necessary creative thinking is an addition to any story.

If your character is in a wheelchair and the important plot device is up a flight of stairs then that shouldn’t mean the character can’t succeed. Instead it means they need a different, less obvious, way to get what they need.

And the solution you choose tells readers more about the character. They might build a device that lets them glide right to the top or plant explosives around the foundations and bring the tower down or hire someone to carry them up. Each of those solutions tells you something about the character as a person.

Symptoms are like that. They are narrative opportunities.

Think about why you’ve chosen PTSD and anxiety. Think about which character they work best with. Think about what those symptoms add.

And consider the other common symptoms and the common memory problems your characters could have. Use them to create varied survivors with different responses.

I worry any time I see an author say their character ‘only feels’ a particular emotion. Because this is never true for people. And while authors often mean ‘this character feels that particular emotion a lot’ sometimes they mean it literally.

A well-written character is not one emotional note, whether they’re a survivor or not.

Resentment towards the adults who exploited and hurt him isn’t unreasonable. Shame about the atrocities she was forced to participated in isn’t unusual.

Think about how to build on these starting points.

If the girl feels ashamed about what she did how does she feel about the people she left behind? Does she think they’re immoral or does she feel sympathy for them and the way they’ve been manipulated?

Does the boy primarily resent the people or what happened to him? Does he associate everyone from his country with what he endured? If so does he view the country that enslaved him differently? Does he see the girl he’s escape with as an exception or does his view of his country effect how he sees her?

Even if these emotions are experienced more often these characters should feel more then one thing. Think about what might prompt other feelings.

If the girl is trapped in a depressive spiral what could pull her out of it for a while? Anger or defensiveness on behalf of her friend? An odd incident that prompts a laugh? Awe or pride at the realisation of how much she’s already done? Because by escaping an active army and enslavement in a foreign country she has already achieved much more then most.

Similarly what could puncture the boy’s rage? What would shock him? What would make him cry?

Is he holding on to anger because he’s afraid of what he might be or feel without it?

A lot of this boils down to standard writing advice for any character: they should feel like complete people.

That doesn’t mean they can’t be flawed, or wrong or missing something important in their lives. It means that they need to feel ‘real’; as if they have dreams and fears and personalities that are possible.

Writing survivors is more complicated but that doesn’t mean the usual approaches to character creation don’t apply. Personal history or traumatic events shouldn’t replace a character’s personality, wants or worries.

And that can be hard to write. Because you’ve got to do all the same work you would for a non-traumatised character, then add another layer of work on top of that.

In fact it’s more then that, because you have to merge all these things and make it look seamless, effortless for the reader.

I emphasised a lot of the planning and thinking part of character creation here. And that is important.

But if you’re struggling with your confidence or character creation generally there is no substitute for practice.

Give yourself permission to experiment, to learn, to get things wrong. This is part of everyone’s writing process.

So yes, think, plan, search for opportunities with things like symptoms. But also practice. Write short scenes or stories. Write multiple versions of the same scene. Try out writing the same character with different symptoms to figure out which you like best.

I hope that helps. :)

Availableon Wordpress.

Disclaimer

#park-chimchim #writing advice #tw torture #tw child abuse #tw child soldiers #tw slavery #writing victims #writing survivors #mental health #rehabilitating child soldiers #child soldiers #survivor accounts #diverse responses are not only realistic #they make a fictional world seem more real

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hazzabeeforlou · 4 years ago

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Digging Deeper

Thanks @alienfuckeronmain for the tag, this I’ve loved reading everyone’s, and I tag @taintedlav @rahashirley @raisemybody @twopoppies @cuethetommo @metal-eye and @seasurfacefullofclouds1 if anyone wants to play!!

1. Do you prefer writing with a black pen or blue pen? ink color matters less than ball-point-ness...

2. Would you prefer to live in the country or city? I want a witch’s cottage with a giant messy garden on the edge of the moors and a forest a million miles away from everyone. So country.

3. If you could learn a new skill what would it be? I’ve actually stretched myself this summer! Am learning French and guitar, and idk if it counts but learning my new job which I NEVER thought I could handle lol since I’ve never worked retail

4. Do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar? Honey ;)

5. What was your favourite book as a child? Well I have to say Narnia and Redwall, but when I was very tiny I loved this book about a girls who could whistle and speak to animals (named Mable) and the Velveteen Rabbit, and a book called “The Lost Princess” which is fucking amazing, by the precursor to CS Lewis, George MacDonald

6. Do you prefer baths or showers? I usually take showers because baths take too much time. Also baths are romantic and that makes me sad, and also I have to look at my body which, ug, not prepared to do that all the time rip

7. If you could be a mythical creature, which one would it be? Mer. Fucking. Maid. Though I’ve always wanted to fly too, I used to spend HOURS in the water just underwater swimming with my legs stuck together just pretending to be on ocean adventures

8. Paper or electronic books? I usually much prefer paper, but since I got these blue light blocking glasses I am finding i’m fine either way physically. Soul-wise though, yeah, paper

9. What is your favourite item of clothing? Probably my mango colored crop hoodie that I once smashed melting frozen blueberries on and then spent hours and days getting the stains out...

10. Do you like your name or would you like to change it? My real name is super boring and typical, though I do like it. I enjoy my tumblr name a lot, Toni, and it feels more genderless and constrictive than my actual name lol

11. Who is a mentor to you? I’ve had so many great teachers, but the biggest lesson I’ve learned in life is that so many you admire can be deeply flawed. I have lots of trust issues. I only take advice from a select few people, and they don’t include anyone ‘old and wise’ lol

12. Would you like to be famous and if so, what for? Oh for sure, I used to want to be an actress or a rock star or whatever. Famous author. I would fucking LOVE to have a platform and help people and cheer people up and see people grocery shopping and have instant friends. I know that sounds terribly naive but I’ve said before I share a lot of Harry’s personality, and I just love flirting with people and smiling with them and giving hugs. Now, I would want to be famous as TONI me and not real me, because then I could never be myself because my fam would find out rip

13. Are you a restless sleeper? Depends on my mattress. Currently, yes, ugg. I wake up in an omega nesting scene from a fic every morning

14. Do you consider yourself a romantic person? Unfortunately yes.

15. Which element best represents you? idk I usually say fire but I’m feeling more water lately

16. Who do you want to be closer to? I’m working on getting to know my amazing sister better, and that’s been lovely.

17. Do you miss someone at the moment? All my friends have been long distance for actual years, so i don’t miss anymore more than normal. I am missing just... the POTENTIAL for someone. This indefinite distancing is wearing on me.

18. Tell us about an early childhood memory. I was like two or three, and we were out on a full moon walk and I was in my stroller in the red sheepskin bundled up, and I remember coming up our sidewalk and looking at the world and moon and thinking, “remember this moment, or you’re going to grow up and forget how wonderful it was.” Also when I was five I had a breakdown on my mom’s lap because “I’m going to grow up and be too big to be sung lullabies to!” and I didn’t want anything to change EVER

19. What is the strangest thing you have eaten? I used to make a concoction of rye crackers, mustard, and pickles. Don’t ask

20. What are you most thankful for? all the opportunities I’ve had in life. I’m so massively privileged

21. Do you like spicy food? depends on how hot

22. Have you ever met someone famous? I saw a few celebs in NYC, Shosh from Girls, the guy from Monk, Tim Gun, John Oliver (and his golden retriever) and I passed a drunk as a skin Alec Baldwin outside Lincoln Center one day. Probably other people I didn’t recognize. Oh and S**** M***** rented my instrument right before covid hit here, and drunk him (or high him) couldn’t believe he had a h*** to play around on, and then I saw him staring at mountains being the most stereotypical rich white boy ever, also he did not send out gay vibes but don’t let that stop your Shiall, please don’t let it

23. Do you do you keep a diary or journal? I almost always start with the new year and do like. A day. And then forget.

24. Do you prefer to use a pen or a pencil? PEN

25. What is your star sign? Aries sun, Aquarius moon, Pisces rising

26. Do you like your cereal soggy or crunchy? Depends on the cereal, those golden grams were BEST thoroughly soaked in milk fight me

27. What would you want your legacy to be? make the world a little better

28. Do you like reading, what was the last book you read? Yes but you know, i’m the worst at making time for it. Still getting through that Brief Interviews with Hideous Men or whatever it is

29. How do you show someone you love them? Just thinking of them and doing little things to surprise them, I think

30. Do you like ice in your drinks? Yep the smaller and more crush friendly the better

31. What are you afraid of? I really do not. like. limb loss. no horror movies for me EVER

32. What is your favourite scent? wet Labrador because it means there’s a WET LABRADOR

33. Do you address older people by their name or surname? surname always unless I’ve always known them by firsts. Religion, man

34. If money was not a factor, how would you live your life? I have this dream of buying up all the land shitty developers snatch up in this country and ceding it back to its rightful owners. I’ve legit cried over little forests turned into parking lots, thanks Joni Mitchell

35. Do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? pools are so clean and have no sharks or jellyfish. that said, they also have no waves...

36. What would you do if you found £50 on the ground? turn it into the store it was closest to. I’m the lawful good box and yes I hate it

37. Have you ever seen a shooting star? YES in Breckenridge one year I saw a fucking meteor shower! I’ve wished on some, they’ve never come true I don’t think.

38. What is the one thing you would want to teach your children? I’m too scared to have children even if I could (I can’t) because of the pressure of what would fuck them up and what wouldn’t

39. If you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it? I love my baby tat @alienfuckeronmain gave me, idk if I’d want another one someday, maybe a sister tat with my sis

40. What can you hear now? The fan, my typing, my parents watching old TV shows

41. Where do you feel the safest? With a pet outside in nature somewhere

42. What is the one thing you want to overcome/conquer? putting limits on things /myself/people

43. Of you could travel back to any era, what would it be? You know I used to really DREAM about this shit, but since I realized I would have genetically DIED in any other era, and that my dreaming was a literal result of white privilege since it would fucking SUCK to be anyone else (I mean even now it’s awful wtf) I just. Stick with the present.

44. What is your most used emoji? the laughing face. oops.

45. Describe yourself using one word. Supercalifragelisticexpialidocious

46. What do you regret the most? I have so many. social. anxiety. nightmares from my 28 years of life that haunt me

47. Last movie you saw? l think it was the Downton Abbey movie?

48. Last tv show you watched? Monk

49. Invent a word and it’s meaning. Surplumn. a really divinely wonderful thing, like ‘oh her lips are surplumn’ like a juicy chocolate mousse and perky breasts idk

#tag games #this was fun but did take forever lol #about me

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fortheheavenssake · 5 years ago

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MM Anon 5

Dec 1

MM ANON, I’m watching series 1 of the crown, BRILLIANTLY WRITTEN AND EDITED. The filming is so accurate and attention to detail. I remember Norman Hartnell designing the Queens wardrobe for the commonwealth tour. My mother was a dress-maker so I watched everything she watched. Methinks the Queen had something to do with this because it’s so accurate. Reason, she’s 92 ‘ what a visual legacy. I can imagine her throwing a ashtray at Philip, and HIS secret dalliances. EPIC!!

—————-

Dec 1

MM ANON ……… the king in waiting ……… “Mmmmm , not many diversions left”……… in need of some TLC. ……… financial scrutiny ……… financial mutiny !!! ………… “ Don’t piss down my back and tell me it’s raining!!!!!!”………… “Catherine ‘ it’s HM” ……… “ Catherine, I want your discretion”………… “ it would be my privilege ma’am”……… “ That’s a tough one, old thing” ……… “she can do it!! “…… “makes you proud old thing, he looks the part” ……… “backseat ,a Philip?” ………… “ dot The Is…………”

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Dec 2

MM ANON … “when we are born, we cry , that we are come”…… “your RH. that’s why you didn’t go” ……… “Four” ……… ahhhhhrrr , I hate mornings!! ……… “give a dog a bone …” ………… “ yes , we’re all watching it! It’s very addictive “ ……… “ How the f***did they know that!!!”………… “ I told them Philip!!” ……… “bloody snoops” …… At the last count sir , all was Ticketyboo.

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Dec 3

MM ANON ……… “Darling’ please pass the Wrinkle cream” ………”she’s on this blog I read”💜……… “ we’ve been invited to the Boxing Day shoot” …… WoW ‘ that’s a beautiful photo Kate …… “he’s to young ‘ good grief William!!”…… ‘This cobra has no fangs ……… “The service, maybe bring C&G.” ……… “ The spring diary ma’am’ was thinking they could do The America’s and Canada” ……… “ the Children too”…… “what say you Philip?” …… “indubitable , old thing” …… “ Settled!!”……” Sidney’ more refreshments”

——————

Dec 4

MM ANON ……… lovers not-on or emerald??…… Alexander McQueen green machine??……… Clean sweep!!!……………Trump wants his ball back…… Banquetiquette ……… “ One has to watch the hot mike Donald!!”……… Meanwhile’ crying in a corner……” a clash of Wills”……… “come on old thing,tell me all the gossip”………” Sydney ‘ gin and Du……” “ Ones a tad exhausted “…… “ you looked stunning Catherine “……… “yes ‘ I saw your killer 👀side eye “…… 👑👑💕💕And so to bed Zebedee!!……… “ Lottie ‘turn your pad off!!”…George’ sleep!!

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Dec 5

MM ANON …… “ no, not the service”……… Strip and rip…… IRSt in peace……” I think you’ll find it best ma’am”…… “ exactly ‘ peace and quiet”…… Distant thunder ……… “On Her Majesty’s secret service”…… No!! Not the whole enchilada………… The dossier, almost complete!!…… “Yes!! It certainly is personal”……… “she lived by the sor-did…… “gather thee rosebuds …………”…… “ not a word,old boy”. ……… “ Mmmm, unfortunate name for a club”……… “a sticky wicket,what!

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Dec 6

MM ANON … BREAKING NEWS ……… ‘ PGs WRINKLE CREAM FAILED MEGHAN-MARKLE AFTER EXHAUSTING APPLICATIONS. 😱😱😱😱 . Beautician suggests plastic surgery, no hope on skin care ……… laser treatment doesn’t cure problem. 🤣🤣🤣

————

Dec 6

MM ANON …… megbots in crisis …… megs spotted on ISS…… megs searchers internet for archificial upgrade …… megs still breastfeeding …… frogcott staff witness meg and Harry in screaming row 😱……… meg accused of bugging KP……… meg and archbishop in risqué photo shoot …… Archbishop denies clergy gossip …… meg ,VF interview ‘ I hate my chicken legs ‘…… Harry in GQ interview, I want a divorce ‘…… GQ, shock ‘horror, Harry’s OK’…… meg pens, ‘confessions of my yachting years’. … $20 million advance.

Thank you MM Anon😊❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

MM ANON, todays post is a light hearted look at the relationship between M&H. ……… to all who interprets, my sincere apologies. 🤣🤣🤣 KEEP CALM AND MEGXIT.

———-

Dec 6

MM ANON 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻Prayers for victims of shooting at navy base in Florida. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 God grant the serenity to accept the things you cannot change. God bless the families involved. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

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Dec 6

MM ANON …… Muffin the mule…… looby loo & Andy pandy …… 95 , time!!…… “no’ not chaz”’……… “ I’m Meghan Markle and I indorse this massage” ……” An American Christmas card”…… betrayal in B&W……… “ it’s HMTQ your talking about!!!”…… “ tell her to PO ‘ it’s the Boxing Day shoot”……… 🎼I’m dreaming of a right Christmas 🎼…… a shortie but goody.

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Dec 6

MM ANON …💜💜💜💜💜💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜💜💜💜💜💜DEAR SKIPPY, WE HAVE EARTH ANGELS IN OUR HUMBLE MIST. GIANTS OF FORTITUDE, GODS OF DIVINITY AND LOVERS OF QUIET HUMILITY , TO ALL WHO WALK THE ROAD LESS TRAVELED WE ARE BLESSED BY YOUR AURA OF PROTECTION AND LOVE.

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Dec 7

MM ANON …… subpoenaed to swim uphill…… “withdrawal with notoriety”……… “pony!! “ she has no fear Catherine”……… “wherever did she get this wilfulness ?…… YOU!!!!…… “Philip will help me write it!!”……… “caution ma’am”……… “no colourful language”…… “ are you pensive LG”…… “frighteningly apprehensive ma’am”…… “I trust my subjects”………”one communicates with Netflix” ………”OMG😱😱”……”The Diana Years”……” it’s confidential LG!!”

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Dec 8

MM ANON …… not an engaging situation …… my LITTLE pony……… WOC-less……… We’re just mild about Harry …… a charitable laundromat ……… expenses,expenses ………”it’s a Multi million business, trim it”…… hangers OFF!!……… ‘‘twas the night before Christmas”……… a conservative Royalist ……… 12th night ……… morning sic -ness……… “ say goodnight Gracie.

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Dec 9

MM ANON ……… Re-Hab-itual behaviour ……” Gone In sixty seconds”…… ( six weeks?) ……… no sight, sound or visual,no optics???? …… old photos, photo shops and disinformation!!……… “ there OK, ma’am!!”…… “ones duty is, keep muddying the waters”…… The Peoples Princess, WHAT!!! ……… “capitalise on it ma’am”…… “AMERICA”…… “are you a gambling man LG?”……… “ only on absolutes”…… Charlotte’s wish-list Web 🤣🐴🦄🎼💕……… “what’s that racket basil”… “It’s Brahms, Brahms 4th racket”🤣🤣🤣🤣

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Dec 9

MM ANON, Dearest skippy, your blog is a cutting-edge example of investigative information and in depth research by your helpers. This community YOU have created is visited by world tabloids , broadsheets and cable TV. Some even associate royalty and the establishment. How many times “ RIGHT HERE,RIGHT NOW!!” has the SKIPPY 20. been spot on. EPIC POSTING,EPIC INVESTIGATIVE DIGGING. ‘JUST EPIC!! BRAVA SKIPPY.

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Dec 10

MM ANON, Soooooo, Nutmeg … The merchandisers whore, has been reprimanded after 2 years of pimping out anything she wears for financial gain …… NO OTHER MEMBER OF THE FIRM DOES THIS, the salacious saleswhore and professional grifter has soiled the monarchy enough!! “ listening H !!! ‘ the public see right through this obnoxious interloper, the gathering of unhappy people are testimony to this couples blatant disregard of royal prerogative. This nonentity must go. ⚖️⚖️⚖️⚖️Justice must prevail.

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Dec 10

MM ANON …… Predictions Guaranteed …… W&K increases commitment …… 🎼”no other love have i”🎼……… mummy serves a Christmas ace……4-0-tee-love…… advantage HMTQ …… nutmeg, FAULT!! …… DOUBLE FAULT!!…… Game, Set and scratch🤣🤣🤣…… “ these are actors,as I foretold you “………” thar’s gold in them thar Hills”………… 🎼”HOLLYWOOOOOOOD”🎼……… “An exit strategy LG.”……🎄 seasonal Sandringham🎄…… “I WANT A POOOOOOOOONY” ,please.🎅🎅😘😘😘………… “ ask your father!!……… ask your mother!! ……… ask Gan Gan. !!😂😂😂

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Dec 10

MM ANON, The first with the most news breaking!!!! The DOC is with child. PG said back in Nov. did I give a clue????? Can’t remember what yesterday’s riddle was 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I’m a mess of jumbled messages,and perhaps a little nuts. RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW. speculation of course.

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MM ANON! ……… TRIBUTE TO TRUTH!! 💜💜💜💜 SALUTATIONS PG. TO SKIPPY AND THE BLOG COMMUNITY OF DEDICATED CONTRIBUTORS AND HELPERS. FOR HMTQ AND GBHMTQAOGC. TO THE curious who visit skippy, royal family,establishment and aristocracy. Thank you for your support. even the intellectually challenged misguided sugars who visit the bloggers blog. SALUTATIONS ALL. the truth will out. 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

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Dec 10

MM ANON , re-Full work mode. Don’t loose track of the fact that this full on grifting colonial carpetbagger has Sunshine Sucks!! It’s a desperate juggernaut of spin , lies and everything in between. That’s why they call it “pubic relations.” ……… just think ‘ sex lies and video tapes. So PLEEEEEEZ. take this bull$h!t with a pinch of salt. Nutmeg lives and dies swimming in PR turds. It’s the nature of that particular beast. It’s simple physics, shit floats to the surface. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

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Dec 10

MM ANON …… Dear anon, a big juicy revaluation?????? Well dear friend,I give what ,and all information I’m given by my esteemed sources. Those sources are well under the establishment radar. Total anonymity,TOTAL!!! The wonderful information is sometimes current,sometimes elaborate and embellished sometimes “spot on!!!” So’ I’ll continue to inform and enlighten as is my want and skippy’s indulgence. GBHMTQAOGC

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Dec 10

MM ANON. , dear hearts , The loneliness of the long distance grifter, the isolation and contempt of the family “ she never had” and desertion of former associates in crime are deserting her in proverbial droves. The lifetime gravy boat she contemplated has listed ,and is rapidly sinking beneath the sea of turds she created for her self centred indulgence. This is our observation and her reality. NB. There is video evidence of her “ habits” from the , “ good old snorting days”. Allegedly!! 🤣🤣🤣

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Dec 10

MM ANON, Trolls have one positive point, they validate the existence of those they resent , they justify that resentment by insults and jibes infantile name calling and illiterate smears. Trolls are degenerate operatives of fallen social climbers,those sad creatures of the ones who once tolerated them but now have nothing left but contempt. Nutmeg is such a creature, an abysmal product of her own greed and failed dreams. How the might have ,have fallen. 🤣🤣🤣

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Dec 11

MM ANON, The anomaly that reportedly exists called archificial is a mystery of unfathomable proportions. The vision of it at the Tutu audience is somewhat baffling, nutmegs obvious unease and awkward stance when trying to hold the poor child,who reaches for… somebody it knows. The whole situation has never been experienced within a minor Royal situation. Nutmeg & Harry are causing ripples 🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣’ will the Christmas card explain more?????? Curiosity awaits!!!!

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Dec 11

MM ANON ………🎼 jingle smells, jingle smells 🎼……… 🎼” I’m dreaming of a POC Christmas”🎼…… “ no Christmas chemicals or alcohol in re-hab”……… “ on a whiter note”…… “ come on Lottie ‘ aunties found a little pony” …… “ So !!! You caved darling.”…… “well ‘ it’s Christmas!!”……… “not turkey ‘ Dover sole!!”… “ but it’s tradition Philip”……“ f**** tradition !!”…… “I’ll inform Sydney”…… “are you going to announce it old thing?”…… ANOTHER COUNTRY … “He’s a brilliant speech writer” …… “you’ll bloody need it

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Dec 11

MM ANON, 🎼she wore blueeeeeeeee velvet 🎼 and the lovers knot,and HMTQ In emeralds

Ok you all! These are hints she gave us….now let’s match to the riddles…..and of note…..she kept talking about the Emeralds….we presumed Kate……she never said Kate…..❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Dec 12

MM ANON ………emeralds should do the trick …… they certainly did…… W&K the lovers knot ………💍 a ring (Rock) of ages…… No Sin-ders you WON’T go to the ball😂😂……… 🎼”re-hab’ I said ,know know know!!!”🎼…… “ we ALL KNOW nutmeg!!”…… “GOD’ she’s in all the papers Philip”…… “ I see, she’s beautiful old thing”…… “she shines Philip”……… Wanta Konta and Kate🎾🎾…… Boris the spider…… “ doesn’t matter who you vote for, the government get in !!”…… sneezing ponytails 🐴🐴

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Dec 12

MM ANON, …… Princess Margaret’s Limerick at President Lyndon Johnson’s dinner party ‘ I quote … “ there was a young lady from Dallas, … Who used dynamite as a phallus,… blowing her tits to bits , Her vagina to China ,and her @sehole to Buckingham Palace. …… forgive the colourful language, but it is funny. 😂😂😂😂😂

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Dec 12

MM ANON , We all remember Fergie and the toe sucking/ pool screwing photos so for her to aligned herself with nutmeg is probably a “ girl’s of a feather “ both are ageing slappers , and who in God’s dear sweet world takes Sarah bloody Ferguson seriously , really REALLY !!! She’s always been an embarrassment to the firm , hated by PP and PC/Camilla PA. so it’s all a smoking mirrors BS-fest. And her association with Epstein, ……… give me a break!!!!!

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Dec 12 - Election Day, UK

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Dec 12

MM ANON, WELL ‘WELL ‘WELL …… nutmeg is apoplectic in re-hab after this mornings papers are FULL of photos of The fragrant Kate and HMTQ in Vlad & lovers knot tiaras. Her sugars are like Lemmings jumping of off Beachy Head 😂😂🤣🤣 and Fergie facedump is identifying with the old slapper because they both caught shagging by the poolside. 😂😂😂. EPIC

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Dec 13

MM ANON …… Cor’ bin a long night!!…… “ Darling ‘ it’s an allagee-gee” ……” majori-ty and crumpets ma’am”…… “ “That’s all ,I’m orf to Sandringham”……… George&Kate set and match…”that’s it Lottie ‘ walk on !!”…… “ I did it auntie Zara”…… “ Ducks in a row then Netty?”……… “Nurse!! What’s the bleeding time”?…… A little procedure!!…… “ the lids screwed down ma’am”……… “ones writing ones screech”…… “he’s coming Philip!!” …… “backlash old thing?”………… “it’s a Norwegian Blue Philip 😂😂”

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Dec 13

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Dec 13

MM ANON, NEVER A LONELY CHRISTMAS 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄Dear hearts , never will the soul that is Skippy abandon you this Christmas ,or her community of spiritual warriors, there love is endless, this is the land of earths angels 👼 and animal amazements. Join the fellowship of friends and hugs. God bless you all ,thank you Dearest skippy, no lonely soul this Christmas. 💜💜💜❤️❤️❤️💚💚💚

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Dec 14

MM ANON ……… Blueeeeeeee velvet …… pop pop Poppins ……… she met Mary ………” Mmmmmm , a bit sneeeeezy”……… “ we’ll go and get something really silly for her” …… it’s not a phone, it’s a MPC…… “ it’s all very Cloak & dagger”…… “ Catherine, I’m deadly serious!!”……… “meals on bloody wheels!! piss orf”……… Shut down everything!! ………… “A new broom,old thing”…………… “ well, ones not amused “………… “I’ll inform Sydney”……… From Cromer!!……… “Cromer???”

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Dec 15

MM ANON, sidebar’ thank you skippy,my favourite colour ROYAL BLUE / INDIGO mix. or blue velvet ‘ a joy. as you inform all the community in a couple of weeks we won’t remember anything else. I have a question dear heart ❣,are you broadcasting over Christmas 🎄 ? My Christmas is spent with a few friends of likeminded opinions. Belgravia is alive and festive. We shall wander into Chelsea to people watch and mull the wine and mince the tarts. Looking forward to wishing all a healthy Christmas 🎄.

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Dec 15

MM ANON ………… 🎼” give a little, take a little”🎼…… “Mary, Mary, quite …………”……FBI , (under the stones)……… “ very succinct old thing”…… “ blunt’ Philip!”……… “its a beautiful yacht ma’am” ………… “ I fear 20, more than 19” ………TO THE VICTOR……”………… a little late dear friend ……… WHITEHALL NOW!! …… only one came ……… IF , dear boy IF”……… “ you were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off”

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Dec 16

ANON, OMG’ something every royal father and mother dread…… “ can’t we take them back to our house, it’s HUGE!!” ( homeless inquiry’s by G&C. ) it’s like “ what’s electrickery” …… or “ why is the sky blue?”… so , Catherine’s response, “ I’ll ask Gan, Gan darling, maybe they’ll find a safe space for them ……… “ I know mummy, they could all live in Gan gans house” 😒😒😒😒 side eyes to William, William changes subject to pony’s and tennis.

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Dec 16

MM ANON, Sooooo’ Nutmeg And himself won’t be At Wednesday’s Turkey nosh at BP ,Mmmmm , no surprise there Ma’am. The insolent obnoxious self indulgent hoe and her now husband see’s it fitting to snub the invitation. Truth be known everyone is waving flags that she’s staying with her Calipornia besties , if they exist?? The anomaly in this puzzle, no comment from himself?? WHY? One would expect one to” come clean” and stop the speculation, strangely strange!!! On the fence? What’s happening?

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Dec 16

MM ANON, praises, salutations, respect, recognition, I stand in awe of the interpretations that anons gracefully post when sifting through the mine field of riddles. It’s an almost psychic melt of another’s thinking 💭 🤔 THANK YOU DEAR ANONS , AND MAY YOU CONTINUE INTO 2020 WITH TENACIOUS DILIGENCE AND APTITUDE. 💜💚❤️

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Dec 17

MM ANON , There used to be British comedy called Kevin and Perry…… two obnoxious teenagers, Kevin always used the argument “ it’s soooooo unfair!!” , this reminds me of that self pitying tw** nutmeg crying over perception of her importance!!! HOW CAN SOMEONE WHO IS IRRELEVANT BE IMPORTANT ???? THEIR PR IS IN OVERDRIVE DESPERATELY SEEKING EXPOSURE AND DEAR K&W IS KNOCKING THEM BACK EVERY DAY. nutmeg hiding in a cubicle screaming and kicking “ it’s sooo unfair” 🤣🤣🤣

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Dec 17

MM ANON , Methinks anon may be on the right track. Nutmegs Christmas card will be something that flips the bird at the establishment. Giving the middle finger to the royal family and her critics, bet whatever it is it won’t be subtle. The vacuous tart is resentful and insecure so she’ll be out to insult and justify her existence , although we all know it’s irrelevant, expect the unexpected. Tutu, B&W , archificial playing football, tits and bums , expect anything and everything

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Dec 17

MM ANON, A very Mary Christmas,has knocked the irrelevant one from the tabloids and broadsheets. W&K are right,left and centre of ALL stories today. What seems to be obvious is that William and Kate come across as relatable and normal, unlike the portentous and phoney nutmegs. Forgive my observation ,himself looks like he’s shot himself in both feet, all the stroking,touching claw holding, is sickening to observe. You could have fooled me he’s not with her. BUT!!! we’ll see at Sandringham.

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Dec 17

MM ANON …… The Christmas Royal choreography ……… Homeless hope……… “not just for Christmas”…… quiet compassions ……… Brits rage at nutmeg……… “ it’s Harry Jim,But not as we knew him”……… “ what’s the answer Spock?”……… EST…… “ eat your vegetables!!”……… “ but mummy, that’s sooooo unfair” ……… “no veg, no pony!!”……… “well from a PR standpoint, it’s an annual thing now”………… “ front and centre ma’am”……… “quite agree!!” ……… “Philip ??” ……… “people identify old thing”……… “ The Sandringham songbirds”

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Dec 18

MM ANON, Today The HMTQ will retire to the warming confines Of Sandringham. Reunited with PP and relaxing evenings in front of a real log fire 🔥. Sydney will be on call to deliver copious amounts of ones favourite tipple. Writing her speech and watching back episodes of Downton Abbey. Occasionally taking trips around the vast estate in the royal Land Rover. A relaxing few days before the tribe descend on them for the festivities 🥳. CHRISTMAS CARDS PLEASE !!!!

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Dec 18

MM ANON …… we are in the age of fast transport. Depending on what mode of royal conveyance Sandringham is one hour from London. ( to anon stuck in the 18th century). A cool Yule to all anons 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄

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Dec 18

MM ANON ……… 🎼tis’ the season’ ……… 🎼……… “Tighter than ones ducks @ss under water ma’am”…… “indubitably LG, send the letters!!”……… “ Netty has it stitched!!”……… I think they were spotted on Elba……… someone saw them in Calvi ……… “Hmmmm, the historical significance doesn’t escape me”……… “ what say you Philip?”……” who gives a sh**, fancy a drinky?

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Dec 18

Anonymous asked:

MM ANON, The dynamic trio’ GC&L , these three children are about to embark on their life adventure, and yes’ I can see them taking over the world, first George, moulded by and coached by his father he will be diplomatic and educated in high tech and security of the family ,think oxford illuminati crossed with Bond. He will grow into a handsome man , followed and pursued by bright well educated beautiful women. He’ll be guided by his parents on who is a suitable girl friend, there will be many.

skippyv20 answered:

Oh yes indeed! Thank you😊❤️❤️❤️❤️

skippyv20

MM ANON / Part 2, Charlotte, Now this young woman to be will become the conflict within herself, opinionated and self willed she will be a laser focused neutral beauty of formidable character, mindful of her station she will develop compassion and empathy with her loving public, this will be a PRINCESS OF AND FOR THE PEOPLE, much loved in all circles of society, willing to get down and dirty and attend diplomatic banquets on the same day. Versatile perfection and stunning looks, 👀. Look out!!

MM ANON. Part 3/ Louis, this young man to be will find himself in a singular activity, I can see him as an explorer of his chosen passion. Space will become very important in 2040. and this young man could well be a pioneer in his chosen field. There may be a conflict and he will be part of that environment. No fear this soldier of fortune, And Again a handsome man followed by swooning beautiful young ladies. He will be advised once again to choose wisely. Speculation of course.

Sounds so wonderful! Thank you😊❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Dec 19

MM ANON …… Kate’s Christmas present to nutmeg …… Wrinkle cream!!😱😱…… new year getaway W&K……The Firm views pre-recorded QS. ……… A Royal decade, the 20,20s. …… “ up a gear ma’am”…… “ Keep calm and ostracise LG”…… 🎬it’s a wonderful life 🎬…… “ FROZEN mummy!!!”………”STAR WARS daddy!!”……… OMG ‘ it’s her Christmas card ……… “ we never received one” …… “ bloody lucky you!! “…… 🎼bye bye miss American pie🎼……… Kate’s tabloid cull…… “ what’s your 20?”

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Dec 19

MM ANON, THE CAMBRIDGE CHRISTMAS CARD. The M/ Cycle is a Triumph engine in a Rickman-Mettisse frame/ sidecar. Circa, 1955 ish’ The Duke being an ardent Biker, (photos of him sitting on a Norton Brietling at the IOM last year.) I’m sure he still goes on “race days at Brands Hatch”. Fast and safe ,all of this is testimony to a visionary CCard to show the world a relaxed and tight family unit. Unportentous and normal. It could be any family in any decade.

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Dec 19

MM ANON, Spending two thirds of your life with your legs open is a consequence of ones occupation, nutmegs stance has been an open book (legs) since we first saw her trundle into KP gardens. At every photographic opportunity she has her legs apart it’s a habit of the life she chose. ‘S’pose life transactions that include money in your hand ,smile on ones face and legs apart can only suggest what your occupation was ?? Yachting takes its toll, only speculation 🤣🤣🤣.

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Dec 20

MM ANON. BREAKING NEWS/ PP TAKEN TO KING EDWARD VII HOSPITAL IN LONDON THIS MORNING. OUR THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS🙏🏻

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Dec 20

MM ANON ………an unwelcome intrusion ……… “ and it was all going so well” …… “ sweeping the the whole bloody house!! “…… fun and games ……… C&G play charades …… Def-Con 4……… “150 million expected ma’am”…… “ my little Pony”…… mini scrambler,🏍Wow!!…… “grouse for the grown-ups”…… “dial it back ma’am?”……” what happens in Sandringham, stays in Sandringham”…… “Charles, see to the RPOs”…… “ night before Christmas,and all round the house “………… Great Expectations

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Dec 21

MM ANON ……… “ it’s a tad cautionary ma’am”……… visiting hours only!!! ……… “ no bloody fuss, piss off” ……… “ and SYDNEY!! no drinks !!!”……… she’s here until January …… Diplomatic immunity…… one way in, one way out!!……… Full cover’ face recognition and sleeper van. ……… “ 🎼the kids are alright!!👀🎼”……… “ to start with’ it’s a 50cc Yam.”……… “ a pony has more torque” ……… “stop worrying Catherine!!”…… “It’s His Decision”……… “ I’ll meet, just say when!! “.

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Dec 22

MM ANON ……… George in the mix. …… a royal blackout …… pensive at the Forth Bridge …… “ Royal Bostic sir”…… “ unity ma’am!!”……… Done and Dusted ……… No Card???……… Christmas IG word salad and virtue massage …… …… rapidly dissolving PR……… “ when in doubt use mental health” ……… “we need a distraction ma’am”……… it’s a win, win !!……… “that’s a silly jumper William”

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Dec 24

MM ANON …… yesterday’s riddle?? ……… Christmas Eve prayer’s …… 2.09 pm in England …… not on my watch. ………… Father Christmas 🎄 comes to Sandringham …… nutmegs not here 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳…… Mike incognito ……… Lost in Space ………” Yes , but dress them warm”. ……… A long wait for the faithful …… everyone is vetted and counted. …… it begins for little royals……” Andrew!!!”…… “Bloody hell’ I’m here you know!!” ……… “Ahhhh, Lobster 🦞 Bisque!!” ……… “Overtired!!”

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Dec 25

MM ANON …… Security , at church service is stitched up like a kipper. RPO is unobtrusive but very present. Notice HMTQ never left alone, always surrounded. GBHMTQAOGC

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Dec 25

MM ANON …… Lottie kills it with pink flamingo … 🥳🥳absent madam🥳…absentee ginger …… K&W now it’s a new monarchy!! …… happy Christmas to all our readers …… UK migrant terrorist alert …… PA on silent running …… skippy breaking news about Lottie on Christmas walk way back……… right here, right now!! ……… DM follows skippy …… dogs behind.

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Dec 25

It’s the time lag. ……… MM ANON ……… to all on the bloggers blog!! 9.26 am. At time of post. A Very special day to all , Christmas, pets , those flying, those being cuddled. Happy Christmas 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄💜💜💜💜💜💜💜 skippy Family, 💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻PG💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻LK🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜to all 🙏🏻🙏🏻💜

Thank you dear MM Anon! Merry Christmas💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

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Dec 25

MM ANON 💜💜💜 HAPPINESS TO ALL THIS CHRISTMAS 🎄 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

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Dec 26

MM ANON ……… Morning paper!! ……… OMG………… she’s a superstar ………… “ your the one who wanted this” ………… “we’ve started a monster”……… 🎼I’m alumberjackandimOK🎼………… don’t go and tell them……… just friends!! ……… 🎼Substitute 🎼……… tumblr is a crap site……… you’ll miss me ……… stop listening to the static. ………… we need the space

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Dec 27

MM ANON …… Right here,Right now!! …………… lots of faithful followers ……… Skippy for news going into New year ……… sales of wrinkle cream skyrockets ……… Vancouver, Smancouver ………… DISINFORMATION …… “ May the force be with you “……… “ Lies, she tells, grifter she is!!”…… hiking,shmiking ……… Archificial in-samination…… happy new lies ……… PR incredulous …… Canada turns its back!!……… “ not another bloody photo!!”…… “ stupid bloody card!,”……… “ another Snifter old thing?”

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Dec 28

MM ANON ……… illusions of grandeur ………not in my Restaurant ……… Canada snubbing you. …… Britain will boo you……… LA New Years …… go to Alaska!!! ……… C&G new found fame ……… W&K , curb there enthusiasm ……… mid-wife’s helper……………United monarchy ………New Years at the Middletons. ……… “who said it.” … “he used to be more accommodating” ………… an empty £4,000,000 joke……… “ he’s not impressed” ………… “ that ship has sailed

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Dec 28

MM ANON … Many thanks for your input in 2019. Wishing you a happy new year. ❤️❤️❤️

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Dec 29

MM ANON, …… Thank you for all you diligently working on the riddles. 💜💜💜❤️❤️❤️ You are the real stars of MM ANON, you are the ones the skippetts look forward to reading. You’re there ( make it easy) day. To understand the riddles and give us the answers is a selfless action of altruism. Thank you all , especially PG and LK 💜💜💜❤️❤️❤️ God bless you all and a happy new year.

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Dec 29

MM ANON …… I have a minor task……… Due Diligence ……… 🎼And here you go again 🎼……… “ They will encounter a heavy work load”…………”it’s not impossible”………… The one thing we can’t take for granted ……… SNAKES and ladders ……… “she only comes out at night” ………… A challenging time ahead …… not their best decision ………… They have all the answers ……… The return will be difficult, if they return??………… make or break!!

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Dec 30

ANON , On New Year’s Eve Eve , we give thanks for the tribulations of 2019 because without them we couldn’t face 2020. We know what to expect, more two faced lies , action and disinformation via their PR. So expect more of the same and more of us with skippy’s help and the help of anons can plough through the coming year. Mutual support and tenacity demands our continuous vigilance. Joyous new year.

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Dec 31

MM ANON …… “ happy new year to all our readers”…… 20.20. predictions ……… MM implosion ………Keep it quite!!………G&C in the viralsphere …… K&W keep it real ……… C&C relax duties ……… The best of the best……… 🎼if your sweet heart sends a letter 🎼………🎼 keep on runnin 🎼………… lack of vision ……… “ she’s blind as a BAT”……… Times Squared…… “ ring out the old, welcome the new”

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28 notes · View notes

aivaehdaevis · 5 years ago

Text

The More Things Change: Ch 1

The More Things Change

by Aivaeh

Disclaimer: Familiar characters, plot elements, and settings belong to L.J. Smith, Julie Plec, and the CW. The author of this work of fanfiction has made no money from it. Summary: I have no idea how it happened, but one morning I woke up in the world of The Vampire Diaries. Which, aside from the insanity of waking up inside a television show made real, might not be so bad—if I weren't stuck in the body of vampire magnet and doppelgänger herself, Elena Gilbert. Pairing(s): OFC x Damon, OFC x Stefan, OFC x Elijah, OFC x Klaus Rating: M Word Count: 5,549 Warning(s): Graphic descriptions of violence on par with the show itself. References to sex and drug use. Mind control and all the issues of consent that go along with it. Character death. Author's Note: I know there are a ton of these fics out there. Still I recently got into the show, and I can't get enough of these types of stories. The urge to write my own wouldn't leave me alone so here it is. Hopefully someone enjoys reading it as much as I enjoy writing it. Master List Next Chapter External Links: AO3 | FF.Net | Wattpad

Chapter One

The color of my arm as I slapped the top of the alarm clock was the first clue something was wrong. Confused by the sudden shift in skin tone, I stilled. Stared down my shoulder to the tips of my fingers. Sitting up, I stretched out my other arm. A quick flip revealed that they were the same shade. Perfect mirrors of each other.

It wasn't until my sights drifted from my mysterious overnight tanning that I realized I wasn't in my room, either. From the steep slanted ceiling to the built-in bookshelf, nothing was familiar except the white walls. The bed wasn't my bed. The cream bedspread and wooden headboard were a different style from my purple comforter and modern piping headboard. Now that I was paying attention, I realized the mattress felt firmer, too.

Where was I? How did I get here? My memory came up blank.

I shuddered and closed my eyes. But no matter how many times I squeezed them shut and reopened them, the room was the same. Wondering if I were trapped in a freakishly realistic dream, I tried to pinch my arm. The sharp pain pulled in an equally sharp a breath, but it didn't jolt me back into my own bed. Not that I'd had much hope it would. I wasn't a lucid dreamer, but I knew when I was awake. And I was awake.

I rubbed my arm, encouraging the pale patch of skin to fade back into the darker golden olive I was now sporting. Waiting for the bruising pulse to fade, a few strands of hair fell across my face. I pinched the lock and brought it up to eye level. It was straight, not the crinkled mess I usually woke with. The shade was a darker brown, too. Nearly black out of the sunlight.

I caught sight of a full-length mirror. If my arms and hair were different… But the angle made it impossible to see myself from the bed. Swallowing, I swung my legs out from beneath the blanket and was both surprised and not to find the same golden coloring so different from my typical pale. My thighs were softer, lacking the sharp definition of muscle. Another twist from my stomach warned me I was starting to freak out again, but I couldn't help it. I took in the hips that flared, and then a chest more generous than mine.

I rose up onto quivering legs, dread deepening with every careful step towards the mirror. When I stepped in front of it, lips parted but with nothing to say. A hand flew over the mouth that wasn't mine. Wide open eyes a deeper shade of brown stared back at me in horror. The head shook side to side, denial in the steep pinch of sculpted brows.

Nina Dobrev's horrified reflection stared back at me.

The face finally lost a shade, and if it went any lighter, it might end up closer to my own. Her hands curled into the straight strands of shining hair, ran across the crown of the skull, tightening into a grip that pulled. I sucked down each breath, watching as the actress in the mirror mimicked every move. The reflection blurred, colors smearing. I shut my eyes before the burn in my eyes manifested into tears.

This was insane. It couldn't be real. I had to be dreaming.

Eyes open again, I looked around. Like a shift in perspective had shown me the full picture, this new understanding painted my surroundings in a very different light. I'd seen this room before. On a television show. Elena's room. The bed where Damon would lounge and wave at Elena with her teddy bear—that was on the floor next to her bed. The window seat Elijah would lean against as he bargained for Elena's friends and family's lives at the price of her own life.

Wrapping my arms around my stomach, as if I could physically hold back the wave of nausea threatening to spill over, I gazed around and shivered. I tentatively moved back to the mirror and pressed the tip of a finger against it. Cold. Smooth and solid. Real. I pressed against the wooden frame. Slightly less cold, but still chilled. Slightly less hard but still solid, small imperfections beneath my skin from the grain, even smoothed with varnish. Real.

I moved faster, as if trying to outrace the truth to the other side of the room, to a desk pressed against the wall. There were candles that gave under my fingertips when pressed hard enough. Real. Notebooks that my fingers slid across until my nails caught the metal spiral. Real. My toes curled into the cold hardwood floor smoothed with a coat or two of lacquer. Real. I picked up a framed picture of Elena smooshed between two adults I'd never seen before. My finger squeaked across the glass as I slid my thumb over their smiles. Real. Brought it up to stare at a younger Elena. This wasn't some prop for a television show, with carefully set lighting and a professional eye. It was the naturally lit and awkwardly shot photograph of an amateur. The faint smell of vanilla lingered in the air. Real.

The picture clattered back onto the desktop. My free hand curled back into a fist that pressed into my stomach. I turned and stared at the frightened girl in the mirror.

Shuffling back to the bed, I settled onto a bottom corner. I stared at the alarm clock. Six thirty in the morning. Early? Or was Elena Gilbert a pre-dawn riser? An insomniac?

Like a song set to repeat, my mind circled back around to the unbelievable situation I was in. Wondering, over and over, how this was possible. What had happened after I'd gone to bed? How did I wake up as a character in a television show? Was this some kind of nervous break? Had I gone mad? Was I dead? In a coma? How real was real? Really real? What'd happen to me if something happened to her?

Rubbing a hand down my face, I struggled with all the questions I couldn't answer. What I did know was that I liked the show well enough to watch it, but I'd never want to live it. Let alone as Elena. Not that I had an issue with her, she served the purpose she was written for. She just wasn't my favorite. Not like Caroline, who'd shown amazing growth. She didn't have any powers like Bonnie. Unless you counted attracting danger.

Since I wasn't craving blood—at least, I didn't think I was—I guessed she was still human. Realizing vampirism was a possibility I had to seriously consider, a snort of laughter bubbled up and escaped before I could stop it. As if a dam broke, I let loose more laughter, this time sounding frantic and half-crazed. What absurd turn into insanity had my life taken?

A door opened somewhere beyond the closed one separating Elena's room from the rest of the house. The sound choked my laughter abruptly short as my heart shot up and got stuck in my throat. The floor creaked outside. Footsteps grew closer. Came all the way up to the room's door. The rap of knuckles set my heart pounding. "Elena?" I knew that voice. Jenna, Elena's aunt. "Better get in the shower if you don't want to be late."

I swallowed back a scream. "Okay." Oh god. I even sounded like Nina Dobrev. Elena. Whoever.

I took a steadying breath before adding a tentative, "Thanks."

"Sure." The footsteps moved back and away as she walked down what I was guessing was a hallway.

Well. Still somewhat dazed, but a little steadier after my bout of mad laughter, I found clothes laid out on a dresser after a moment of unfocused gazing while my brain rebooted. Getting up and going over, I picked them up and turned towards the built-in bookshelf, beside which was another door. One Jenna hadn't knocked on. I had vague memories of a bathroom—one the ghost of Bonnie's ancestor trapped her inside.

Sidling up to it, I hesitated for a second before pushing it open. A connecting bathroom, and not just to Elena's bedroom. The opposite door must've led to Jeremy's. It wasn't large, but it had enough room for two sinks, a toilet, and a shower tucked behind the inward swinging door.

Discomfort had my hands gripping the clothes tighter at thought of washing somebody else. Did she have a bathing suit? No, I'd still have to undress. But that was better than scrubbing.

I chewed on my inner cheek before sighing. This whole situation was a can of worms. What were the ethics of a fictional character's bodily autonomy, if they weren't so fictional anymore? At first it seemed cut and dry—treat it with the respect you'd give any other body—except for the fact I was the one currently occupying it. Which made me wonder what had happened to the real Elena. Or was she real? Had someone's consciousness been in this body before? Was she still in here, somewhere? What about Jenna? Was she real? She'd sounded real. Would she parrot lines from the show, like some sort of scripted character? Was I? Had I already been doing that all my life? Was I doing it now?

Already overwhelmed, I wasn't up to parsing through all the metaphysical questions that went along with finding myself in a fictional universe populated by fictional characters. Nevermind all the implications and ramifications. Knowing jack shit about what had happened to me, I couldn't even venture towards any sort of guess, educated or otherwise.

I turned to the more concrete and immediate issue instead. Could I get away with not washing? I raised my arm and sniffed. Nothing funky but—ugh. Going a day without showering had my nose wrinkling as if I'd caught a whiff of body odor. Besides, at some point, I was going to have to use the toilet.

I compromised with myself by making it quick and not looking at anything.

I kept hurrying as I wrapped myself up in towel before daring to go in front of the mirror. Elena, hair plastered against her head and neck, looked freaked out. I frowned. So did she. Eager to banish the surreal sight away, my gaze dropped like a stone to the sinks. A separate toothbrush holder for both, one tube of toothpaste between them. I took hold of the purple toothbrush, hoping I'd picked the right one. I concentrated on finishing up the morning's ablutions.

Back in the bedroom, I shut the door behind me. I was about to unwind the towel and dry off before wrapping up Elena's longer hair when a sound broke the morning quiet and sent a chill through my blood.

"Caw!"

My arms and neck prickled from all the hairs now standing straight. My head turned, slow and reluctant. A light cotton curtain shifted in a breeze from an open window. A window I knew had been shut earlier when I'd examined the bedroom. On the thick boughs of an old tree standing beyond perched a great black crow, watching.

Head tilting, its small black eye remained fixed. On me. After a minute where we stared at one another and it—he?—stayed still, I took a few careful steps to the window. Its head straightened and a wing shook. I paused, but it didn't hop away or take off, so I finished crossing the final bit of space between me and the window. I ignored the curtain as its edge brushed along my bare arm. I stared into that black gaze, searching for something more than animal in its eye. Something intelligent. The very idea was crazy, but at this point, it was a drop in an ocean of madness.

"Caw!"

Sucking down a breath, I gripped the windowpane and pushed it shut. The crow stretched its neck and dipped its head. Standing back up, it launched itself into the sky with a powerful flapping of its shining black wings.

The air rushed out of me, taking the worst of my anxiety with it. "Perv." Forehead falling to the glass, I shut my eyes to shut out this fake world and let my skin soak up the cold. The sun's light glowed red behind my eyelids. I stared into it for as long as I could stand before opening them back up and shutting the curtains. Not that they'd do much good, white and thin as they were.

Hurrying to dress, my sights darted around to all the windows. On the plus side, I was so preoccupied with avoiding any peeping crows I didn't have time to worry out about dressing a body that wasn't mine. Since I hadn't wrapped my hair, the back of Elena's red shirt dampened. Swearing, I snatched the towel I'd discarded from the bed. I tried massaging the worst of the wetness out of it before wrapping it up.

With Jenna still alive, Elena was a seventeen-year-old Junior. She had to have a hair dryer somewhere.

Not hearing anyone or anything stirring out of the bathroom, I went back in. I found one in cupboards beneath the sink, along with a set of curling irons and various other beauty paraphernalia. A power strip laid nearby for the plug. Rummaging through the rest of the drawers, I found Elena's makeup.

With an unfamiliar face, it took me longer than normal to apply it.

As soon as I was ready, I ventured beyond the bedroom door and into the hallway. It looked fairly normal. A generic pastoral painting hung on the wall above a low side table. More doors, one that must have led to the bathroom. Jeremy's had to be beyond it. I supposed that meant Elena's parents had the room across. Jenna must be sleeping there now.

The stairs were at the end of the hall. I paused at the top, listening for any sounds of life down below. Sure enough there was a slight clatter and the running of a faucet. Kitchen?

Only one way to find out.

The stairs were well made. They didn't creak as I descended. Pictures were arranged on the wall. Family portraits. The two adults from the framed photograph in my room featured in these, too. Elena's parents, maybe. I don't remember the series ever featuring either of them.

The faucet was shut off before I reached the landing. Drawers were rolling open and closed, though, punctuated by the creak of a cabinet door. The controlled orchestra of domesticity led me to the right and down a narrow hall that led into a wide-open archway. The smell of freshly brewed coffee grew stronger with each step. Beyond the arch sat a full-size dining table. Scooting around, I approach an island counter separating the kitchen proper from the dining area.

Jenna was moving back and forth between the cabinets and island, various breakfast paraphernalia spread out on the other counter lining the wall. Boxes of cereal and pop tarts, bowels of fruit, a loaf of bread beside a plate of butter. She was muttering, but it was too low to make out.

I stopped at the outside of the island, next to the stools, and leaned on its marble top. "Jenna?"

If she noticed my hesitation she didn't seem to think it was a big deal. "Elena! Morning." Her smile was almost manic, stretched way too wide and revealing way too many teeth. "I made breakfast!" She paused before adding, "Well, I pulled it out of the fridge and cabinets. But. Breakfast!"

I swept my sights along the strange horde of food.

Jenna followed my lead, twisting at the waist to take in her work. "Too much?"

"Little bit." I squeezed my hands together. Somewhere up above, a toilet flushed. Surprised, I looked up. That's something I never heard on the show.

"Oh, good. Jeremy's up." Jenna shook her head. "Was not looking forward to dragging him out of bed."

It was a guess, but, "First day of school."

Jenna looked over and must have seen the trepidation in my face and interpreted it as nerves. "You'll do great, Elena. No one expected you to keep up your grades last year after—" she trailed off into an awkward silence before shrugging. "Anyway. It'll be better. You'll do better." Before I could think of a reply, that slightly panicked glaze came back over her eyes. She held up her hands, "Not to place undue expectations on you. Fine is good. You'll do fine."

Wow. The woman was a bigger wreck than I was. And I was an unwitting body snatcher plopped into the start of the Vampire Diaries' pilot episode. I managed a careful smile. "Right."

Jenna brightened. "Right!" She turned and thrust a hand towards a box of frozen Eggos. "Waffles?"

The thought of food threatened to churn my still sour stomach. "Oh. I'm… not really hungry this morning."

Jenna looked as if I'd shot a dog. "Nerves. Should've thought of that," she fretted. Before I could assure her it was a nice gesture, she burst into motion. Sweeping the food back into her arms before carrying it back towards the fridge. "How about coffee?" she asked over the tower of boxes and plastic containers. "Just brewed a pot."

I wasn't really feeling up to that, either, but didn't want to make things any worse. I wasn't entirely certain she wouldn't disassemble the keurig. "Sure." The shiny coffeemaker sat beside a sterling silver sink. I pushed myself off the counter and carefully sidestepped Jenna to the percolating pot.

Then I realized I had no idea where the mugs were.

Casting an eye to Jenna, who kept shoving the food back into the fridge, I wondered if she'd notice me searching the cabinets when a loud stomping moving swiftly down the stairs signaled Jeremy's impending arrival. The boy himself appeared a moment later, bangs swept across his drooping eyes. He slouched past the table and the island, coming to a stand beside me. The smell of teenage boy was very strong—the hoodie must have come off the floor, and I hadn't heard the shower—when he reached over my head to the end cabinet.

"Breakfast?" Jenna asked, voice hopeful as she half-straightened from the fridge.

"Coffee," Jeremy grunted, plucking a mug from the cabinet.

Jenna sighed and went back to putting away the food.

Jeremy took a glance at the remaining debris from Jenna's impromptu buffet and arched a brow before dismissing it with a shrug. Apparently, the coffee pot was more interesting.

I took a moment to soak in the presence of two fictional characters. From Jenna's frenetic movements to the languid shuffling of Jeremy Gilbert as he moved back towards the island and one of the stools.

Surreal didn't begin to cover it.

I reached up into the same cabinet I'd seen Jeremy take a mug from to get my own. The coffee smelled good as it flowed into the cup, releasing an especially strong aroma. I took a moment to just let the scent wash over me, ground me. How could this be a dream? How could it be real?

Noticing my hands were beginning to shake again, I forced the questions back and wondered which one of the ceramic chicken-shaped jars standing alongside the backsplash were filled with sugar. Tentatively I checked the rooster. The contents were white and powdery but looked too fine. Probably flour. I checked the next, a brown hen. Bingo.

Shit. Where were the spoons?

"You both have rides?" Jenna asked as I surreptitiously tried to pull open a drawer to peek for silverware.

"Yep." Slurping resumed from Jeremy's place at the counter.

"Bonnie's picking me up?" I didn't mean to make it sound like a question, but it's not like I knew what Elena's plans had been prior to possessing her body. I had no idea how close to the show things were. If I was even in the 'show' or some alternative universe. Or if I was going insane. Maybe I was trapped in a hallucination. Maybe it was about to go bad, and killer clowns were going to jump out of the next drawer.

I opened it very carefully. Turned out it was where the big utensils like the bar-b-que fork went.

Where the hell did these people put their spoons?

"Okay. What else? Lunch money?"

I had given up the search for the spoon and decided to drink the coffee black when Jeremy's free hand lifted.

Jenna grabbed a purse off the end of the counter and fished inside until she emerged with a few bills. Jeremy plucked them from her hand and had them shoved into his pocket before Jenna had the chance to hand them over. Swiveling around in the chair, he got up and wandered back out of the kitchen, mug traveling with him.

Did he actually have a ride?

Trying to remember, I started to take a sip. Soon as the edge of the mug touched my lip, it became clear it was too hot to drink. How'd Jeremy manage? Hoping to cool it some, I blew out a breath.

"Elena?"

I froze, eyes wide as I looked over.

Jenna had another ten in her hand.

"Oh, I'm… I'm good." I had no idea if that was true, but I wasn't about to emulate Jeremy's grabby hands. That was just rude.

"Okay." Jenna folded the cash back into her wallet before plopping it back into her handbag. The purse-o-phile in me admired the supple white leather in a quilted pattern. "That's it? Don't need anything else?" She ran her eyes over me. "Backpack?"

"Upstairs?" Probably.

"Don't forget it." Jenna squinted. "What am I missing?"

I stared back, face blank, heart racing.

Her eyes widened. "Crap! My thesis adviser." She snatched the handbag off the counter and hurried out another door that must've led outside. "Good luck!"

As soon as she was gone, I collapsed on top of the counter. The mug clattered against the marble top, and a splash of coffee hit my hand. I hissed, snatching it away and lifting it to my face for inspection. Well, no third-degree burns. Just stung like a bitch. I blew on it, stomach again dropping like a stone as I realized there was no way I'd sleep through a burn, even a minor one.

With the rest of the house's occupants elsewhere, I conducted a proper search of the kitchen. Having no idea how long I'd be stuck in this… situation… I tried to remember where everything was. Or, at least, the important stuff.

Turned out the spoons were in a drawer on the other side of the island.

The coffee had cooled by the time I got sugar into it. A digital clock on the fridge read the time as twenty minutes after seven. If Bonnie was picking Elena up, it probably wouldn't be much longer before she was here. I was pretty sure most schools started at eight. Give the girls fifteen to twenty to get there and find their home rooms—Bonnie was probably on her way right now.

High school. Again.

I grimaced into the mug before taking a longer drink. Did I have to go? I could claim I'd gotten sick. Then I remembered Jenna's frantic need to be helpful, to get her two charges sent off fed and ready for the day. Even if she wasn't real, she'd seemed real enough. I didn't like disappointing people in general. I really hated the idea of disappointing someone working so hard to make sure things went well for—well, Elena, technically. Which was me. For now.

Besides, this might not last. Elena would have an easier time adjusting if her attendance didn't take a nosedive.

Or maybe this was a lucid hallucination and I was wasting my time.

I set the mug down and rubbed a hand down my face. Well, what else would I do? Watch television? Play games? Might as well play along. I didn't know what was happening. Seemed safest to go along with what I knew. Disrupt as little as possible.

But man. High school.

With as much excitement as a sewage treatment tech headed off to work, I trumped up the stairs and back towards Elena's room. I remembered which one it was. Granted, mostly because I'd left the door open and rock music was emanating from the other closed door. Yeah. That was definitely Jeremy's room.

Back in Elena's domain, I hunted around for a backpack. If the girl had her outfit laid out, I was willing to bet she'd had her school supplies ready to go to.

Sure enough, I found it leaning against the chair tucked under the desk. It was one of those bags that looked like a giant purse or laptop case, but in leather. Really nice. I swung it onto my shoulder and squeezed the straps. They gave a comforting little creak.

I paused to look around for anything else I might need. Catching my reflection in the mirror, I paused to stare. God. This was Elena Gilbert. I mean, I was Elena Gilbert. Headed off to her first day of Junior year.

She'd meet Stefan Salvatore today.

I didn't know how to feel about that. On one hand, I thought Stefan—or Paul Wesley—was ridiculously handsome. On the other, he was a vampire. He was a vampire that tore off people's heads when he got in a feeding frenzy.

It was a great relationship to stream from the comfort of my couch. But living it? Um, no. I didn't like the idea of being the doppelgänger with the magical blood that every male vampire seemed to want for one reason or another.

I was still staring at Elena in the mirror when a chime went off downstairs. Doorbell. Probably Bonnie.

I squeezed the handles of Elena's bag again and just stuffed all the questions and worries back down. I mean, vampires? Doppelgängers? Witches? Werewolves? Curses? I couldn't function if I thought about all this craziness. Who could? What I needed to do was take my dad's most often given advice: Go with the flow.

I retraced my steps back downstairs, but this time didn't turn back towards the kitchen but hurried for the door. A glance through the peephole showed Bonnie freaking Bennett waiting patiently on the other side of the door. A weird sensation of being slightly out of it came over me as I pulled the door open and was greeted with a bright smile.

"Hey!"

"Hi." I tried to return her blinding smile with one of my own.

It must not have gone very well. Bonnie's immediately slipped into a slight frown and furrowed brows of concern. "Nervous?"

I laughed. To my credit, I sounded only a little crazy. "You have no idea." Bonnie Bennett. I was talking to Bonnie Freaking Bennett!

Bonnie fixed another smile on her face, this one far more empathetic. "Ready or not, we'd better get going."

"Okay." My stomach was still flipping. Good thing I hadn't taken Jenna up on her offer of food. I wondered if I should let Jeremy know I was leaving, then figured he wouldn't hear over the music. He probably wouldn't care even if he could.

Stepping out, I shut the door behind me. Jeremy would lock up, wouldn't he? When Bonnie didn't say anything about walking away without locking up myself, I felt my shoulders loosen slightly. I followed dutifully behind her.

The Gilbert's maintained a nice front lawn, and I didn't doubt that the back was as meticulously well kept. The bushes were all evenly trimmed, and the grass had been cut recently. I wondered if it was all Jeremy, or if I shared in the outdoor chores.

We followed the sidewalk to the driveway where Bonnie had parked her blue Prius. We settled in, buckled our belts, and were off with a turn of the engine. Imogen Heap's electronically altered voice filled the car with the chorus of Watcha Say.

Bonnie leaned over and turned down the stereo before straightening back up and shifting the car into drive. I turned my sights to the front windshield, watching as she turned left and headed down the street. I tried to make note of every sign we passed and subsequent turn she made. But I started losing track before we hit what I guessed was Mystic Fall's main street.

The two-story homes turned into brick buildings sporting various signs proclaiming one type of business after another. The street itself was lined with old fashioned black streetlamps rather than the newer curved sort that had dotted the neighborhood. I didn't doubt they were electric, but it was a nice touch. Hanging from the occasional stop light were banners announcing an upcoming festival.

"Night of the Comet," I muttered as we passed beneath another gently rippling advertisement.

"This Thursday. Can you believe it's already here?" Bonnie kept her eyes on the road.

"Nope," I answered in complete honesty. "I cannot."

"Grams says it's a bad omen." Bonnie huffed a scoffing laugh. "She says a lot of things nowadays."

Giving up on following the route to the high school, I turned to look at Bonnie instead. A distinct sensation of déjà vu washed over me. I swallowed before trying for a casual, "Like what?"

I must have succeeded, because Bonnie launched into the topic with gusto. Clearly she'd been waiting to get this off her chest. "All sorts of crazy stuff. Like, apparently, I can see into the future." Her mocking tone left no doubt as to what she thought of that. "Woman's finally lost it, Elena."

"Can you?"

"What?"

I tugged at the seat belt. "See into the future?"

Bonnie glanced at me, brow raised. "If I could, don't you think I'd have a winning lottery ticket in my hand right now?"

"Maybe it doesn't work that way."

"Right." Skepticism dripped off the word. "Not very useful then, is it?"

"I don't know about that."

Bonnie shrugged. "Well, I did predict Heath Ledger. And Obama."

Oh, god. I remembered that line from the show. My mouth went dry and I wiped my hands down my jeans. I cast about for something to say. "How about Trump?"

"Huh?" Bonnie asked, glancing my way before the traffic light turned green.

"Never mind," I muttered before sinking further into the seat. Something about this… why did I remember this so well?

"O-kay." Bonnie shrugged the comment off. "Anyway, Grams says were descended from the Salem witches."

"There weren't any witches in Salem," I muttered.

"Right? That's what I told her. She just gave me this look and says, 'Not that they caught.'" Bonnie huffed. "Convenient, huh?"

"I guess." I glanced at her. "If there were really witches there, though, they probably would've used magic to escape."

"I guess." Bonnie frowned. "Don't tell me you believe Grams' cra—"

A black shape flew straight at the glass, thumping into the windshield. Bonnie and I let out startled shrieks as the thing suddenly disappeared over the roof of the car. Bonnie gave the wheel a sharp turn and slammed on the breaks. We hit our belts as the car came to an abrupt stop.

I didn't realize I was breathing so hard and fast until Bonnie's hand on my shoulder startled the ringing from my ears. "Elena? Oh my god. Are you alright?"

I took a slower, deeper breath. Ignoring the sudden sweat that had broken out over my forehead, I turned with a forced grin. "Yeah," I breathed. I cleared my throat and tried again. "Yeah." My voice was stronger that time. "Just startled."

Bonnie collapsed into her seat. "I know!" She leaned forward and looked up at the windshield where a slight smear was the only evidence something had hit the glass. "I swear, it was a huge bird or something." She turned to me, eyes big and pleading. "I didn't see it."

I managed another shaky smile, rubbing a hand across my clavicle, where the belt had caught me. "It's fine. We're fine."

Bonnie frowned. "I know. I just—I figured—" She waved a hand, as if to encompass the whole of the car.

Right. The accident that killed Elena's parents. What had she said? "I, uh. I can't be afraid of cars forever."

I must have gotten it right, because Bonnie's answering grin was far more relaxed. She grabbed my hand, squeezing it tightly. "I predict that this year is going to kick ass. And I predict that all the sad and dark times are over and you are going to be beyond happy."

I remembered that line. It was—so wrong it wasn't even funny. I summoned a smile for her anyway. It was a nice gesture, after all. "I hope so."

But a shiver traveled down my spine. It was real. Somehow, impossibly, it was real.

All of it.

I turned my head towards the passenger window and looked up to one of the signs lining the street.

A black crow looked back and cawed.

#fanfic #the vampire diaries #tvd #damon salvatore #stefan salvatore #ofc #the more things change #damon x ofc #stefan x ofc #elijah x ofc #klaus x ofc #oc #elena gilbert #klaus #elijah mikaelson #bonnie bennett #caroline forbes #jeremy gilbert #jenna sommers

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themimsyborogove · 7 years ago

Text

G I A N T . C H A R A C T E R . S U R V E Y

[ tagged by ]: @eloquated

[ tagging ]:

G E N E R A L

[ name ]: Catarina Loss

[ nicknames ]: There has been no avoiding Cat as a nickname, but I prefer to be called Catarina.

[ birthday ]: September 9th

[ birthplace ]: Spain

[ age ]: 396

[ eye color ]: Blue naturally, brown glamoured.

[ height ]: 5’4

[ weight ]: 112 pounds, last time I checked.

[ nationality ]: Spanish, I suppose, though my mother was Moroccan.

[ astrological sign ]: Virgo

[ location ]: Magnus’s living room for this silliness.

[ siblings ]: None.

[ pets ]: I don’t have the time to keep a pet. I can come visit Chairman Meow if I need to hold a cat.

[ in the morning i’m ]: In desperate need of coffee.

[ all i need is ]: The ability to help people.

[ love is ]: Something to be treasured.

[ i’m afraid of ]: Needles. No, I’m kidding. I’ve seen a lot, and I’m not afraid of much.

[ i dream about ]: Work, usually.

H A V E . Y O U . E V E R ?

[ pictured your crush naked? ]: He does look very nice naked. And he turns such an interesting color when he gets flustered. Like right now.

[ used someone? ]: No.

[ been used? ]: Yes.

[ been cheated on? ]: Not that I know of.

[ considered cheating? ]: Never.

[ been kissed? ]: Yes.

[ done something you regret? ]: Yes. Everyone has regrets.

F A V O R I T E

[ food? ]: Anything with a lot of spice and garlic.

[ fruit? ]: Melons.

[ candy? ]: I’ve always liked hard candies, through they’re terrible for your teeth.

[ color? ]: Haha, I would have to say blue.

[ number? ]: I can’t think of one.

[ animal? ]: I’ve always liked dolphins.

[ drink? ]: Coffee, wine, wheat beers

[ soda? ]: I don’t drink soda much.

[ book? ]: Hmm, I’m not sure off the top of my head. I like reading, but I don’t have much time for it. The books kind of blur together.

[ room? ]: The bedroom. I don’t spend much time at home.

[ movie? ]: I did like those Lord of the Rings movies.

D O . Y O U ?

[ have a boyfriend/girlfriend? ]: Ragnor, though he’s always complaining about how childish of a word ‘boyfriend’ sounds.

[ like cleaning? ]: No.

[ have a tattoo? ]: No.

[ have any piercings? ]: My ears, though I don’t bother to wear earrings much.

[ cheat on tests/homework? ]: No. You don’t learn if you cheat.

[ drink/smoke? ]: I drink occasionally, but never smoke.

[ swear a lot? ]: Not usually. It loses its impact if you overdo it.

[ like watching sunrises or sunset? ]: I like sunsets.

[ pray? ]: No.

[ go to church? ]: No.

[ have secrets? ]: Yes.

[ have a best friend? ]: I’m lucky to have Magnus.

[ like your own handwriting? ]: I haven’t thought about it. But usually I can read it. Ragnor, why are you laughing?

A R E . Y O U ?

[ obsessive? ]: I don’t think so.

[ excited? ]: Not right now.

[ bored? ]: No, watching Ragnor answer his questions is hilarious.

[ happy? ]: Yes.

[ missing someone? ]: Always.

[ confused? ]: Not usually, no.

[ tired? ]: Always.

[ mad? ]: Rarely.

[ sleepy? ]: Always a little. I work very long hours.

D O . Y O U . E V E R ?

[ wait around just to talk to someone? ]: I have, yes.

[ write about those ‘special’ moments? ]: I’ve tried before, but I can never seem to keep a regular diary.

[ wish you were a member of the opposite sex? ]: There have been times in the past, when women didn’t have the rights that we do now. I lived through some bad times.

W H O . W A S . T H E . L A S T . P E R S O N . W H O ?

[ you talked to? ]: A coworker before I left the hospital.

[ you hugged? ]: Ragnor.

[ you kissed? ]: Ragnor.

[ sent you a letter? ]: Ragnor left a sweet letter on the nightstand before he left for work a few days ago.

[ you sent a letter to? ]: Simon Lovelace.

[ you laughed with? ]: Magnus and Ragnor.

[ slept in your bed? ]: Ragnor.

[ you shared a drink with? ]: Ragnor and Magnus.

[ you went to the movies with? ]: Ragnor.

[ yelled at you? ]: A patient. I try not to take it personally.

[ you called? ]: I don’t remember. I don’t talk on the phone much.

[ you kicked? ]: Ragnor. He did deserve it.

[ you saw? ]: Magnus and Ragnor, again.

W H O . I S ?

[ the most handsome person you know? ]: Oh no, they’re both staring at me. And Magnus is going to make a scene when I say Ragnor.

[ the weirdest person you know? ]: Magnus and Ragnor are both too weird for words.

[ the funniest person you know? ]: Magnus.

[ the loudest person you know? ]: Also Magnus.

[ the quietest person you know? ]: Jem, I think.

[ the sweetest person you know? ]: Ragnor, he just buries the sweetness deep down.

[ the most serious person you know? ]: The Silent Brothers as a whole.

[ your best friend? ]: Magnus.

[ the person you hate the most? ]: I have lived through many years and many evils. I couldn’t name the one that was the worst.

[ the person you see most? ]: Ragnor.

[ your soul-mate? ]: I don’t think people have a single soul-mate, or that soul-mates are necessarily romantic. Magnus is my soul-mate as much as Ragnor is.

W H A T . I S ?

[ the first thing you thought of when you woke up? ]: How long I could stay in bed before I was late for my shift.

[ the song that best describes you? ]: I don’t know. Magnus could probably answer that better, I don’t pay much attention to lyrics.

[ your best feature? ]: You would have to ask Ragnor.

[ your most treasured memory? ]: Holding my son.

I N . T H E . F U T U R E

[ what is the age you hope to get married? ]: I’ve seen people murdered for their spouse’s crimes. I don’t think I could get married.

[ number and names of kids? ]: One. Cecil.

[ where do you see yourself at age twenty? ]: Hahaha

[ describe your dream wedding? ]: *shudders*

[ when and how do you want to die? ]: I don’t want to die. If I have to, I hope it’s to save someone else.

[ what are your career plans? ]: I’m a nurse. It’s not a career plan, it’s just what I am.

[ some place you’d like to visit? ]: Ragnor, we should take a trip to Loch Ness and start those monster rumors up again. Oh, don’t make that face.

L A S T . T I M E

[ last time you went out of state? ]: A week or two ago, I think.

[ last time you were outside? ]: On the walk from the hospital to Magnus’s apartment.

[ last time you had a snowball fight? ]: When Ragnor and I went hiking last month. I won.

[ last time you were listening to music? ]: Magnus is playing something to wind Ragnor up. It’s working.

O T H E R

[ how many people would you say are good friends of yours? ]: There are a handful.

[ what hurts the most, physical or emotional pain? ]: Emotional.

[ have you felt this recently? ]: Yes.

[ what do you wear to bed? ]: Nothing. To sleep in at least. Ragnor, are you okay?

[ when’s the last time you slept with a stuffed animal? ]: Not since I was a child.

[ have you ever used a ouija board? ]: Goodness, no.

[ how many rings before you pick up the phone? ]: I usually don’t even notice that it rang.

#warlock squad

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ccorinnef · 6 years ago

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How Do I Find Inspiration To Create?

Inspiration seems to be a tricky and elusive thing. For so many of us it can be flighty and inconsistent, kind of like sunshine in Scotland. I think many people view inspiration as a mad frenzy of activity and creativity from which amazing things are born. And sometimes it can be this way; sometimes I get the urge to create something right at that moment - I just have to get it out of my head into a physical form. Those bursts of creativity, though, are more about the activity than the product, they often stem from a restlessness in my soul.

More often than not, though, inspiration, to me at least, is more of a gentle nudge - a tiny glowing ember in the back of my mind. I’ll get an idea for something and note it down immediately in case I forget, but, usually the ideas sit at the back of my mind, on the edge of my consciousness for days, weeks and months before they come to fruition. I like to ponder over ideas, flip them upside down, think about the process and the outcome, incorporate other ideas, and think about mediums and messages.

As defined by Oxford Dictionaries, inspiration is, “The process of being mentally stimulated to do or feel something, especially to do something creative.” Historically, in Greek, Latin and Norse cultures, inspiration was seen as a gift from the gods. The inspired person would be given access to the thoughts of the divine and would no longer be in control of their (the artists’ or poets’) creation. These episodes of inspiration were seen as a frenzy or ‘ecstasy.’ French Renaissance poets also ascribed their inspiration to the divine. Pontus de Tyard described four different categories of heavenly inspiration: “(1) poetic fury, gift of the Muses; (2) knowledge of religious mysteries, through Bacchus; (3) prophecy and divination through Apollo; (4) inspiration brought on by Venus/Eros.”

It wasn’t until the 1700's that inspiration was separated from the divine and located within the mind. John Locke suggested that although entirely random, inspiration was a “natural association of ideas and sudden unison of thought.” While Edward Young described inspiration as “the god within,” Ralph Waldo Emerson and Percy Bysshe Shelley viewed it as “madness and irrationality.” Sigmund Freud decided that inspiration came from within the psyche as a result of psychological conflict, a more scientific way of saying ‘mad frenzy.’ In response to Freud’s analysis artists of the Surrealist movement attempted to tap into the unconscious; they used dream diaries, automatic writing, Ouija boards and poetry. Carl Gustav Jung suggested that artists are “attuned to something impersonal, something outside of the individual experience.”

In their study, ‘Imitation, Inspiration, and Creation: Cognitive Process of Creative Drawing by Copying Others’ Artworks,’ Takeshi Okada and Kentaro Ishibashi sought to understand the “cognitive processes underlying creative inspiration.” They found that participants were inspired to produce new and unique artwork having studied another unfamiliar artists’ work. Okada and Ishibashi suggest that exposure to unfamiliar artwork relaxes ‘cognitive constraints’ and inspires new perspectives.

Another study by Todd M Thrash and Andrew J Elliot found, among other things, that inspiration is uncontrollable, subjective, and linked to ”psychological resources, including self-efficacy, self-esteem and optimism.” People who have more instances of feeling inspired also feel they are more creative. They found that those who are open-minded about feeling inspired were more likely to experience inspiration. “Mastery of work, absorption, creativity, perceived competence, self-esteem, and optimism were all consequences of inspiration, suggesting that inspiration facilitates flow, creativity, and important psychological resources.”

Inspiration is clearly a significant component to creativity; “Inspiration transforms a person from experiencing a culture of apathy to experiencing a world of possibility.” My main source of inspiration has always been nature, in particular, Scottish landscape. I grew up on the North coast of Scotland where there wasn’t much to do except enjoy the scenery – the connection between the people and the land/sea is so ingrained in Northern Scottish culture it is impossible not to love it. You might have noticed that most of my acrylic paintings are skyscapes and seascapes; these are all based on real references from Scotland, the colours and shapes in the sky have always fascinated me. I am in constant awe of this planet that we call home. The more that is discovered through science about planet earth, the more in awe I seem to get. If you think about the massively wide diversity of life that grows here, in plants, animals, land, water and air, it’s hard not to be inspired.

I feel such affinity for this planet; when I think about all the damage humans have done to the environment I feel physical pain and sadness as though I were feeling the miners digging into my own being and the gas clogging my own air. My focus on natural untouched landscapes, mostly of the Scottish highlands, is driven partly through extreme admiration for those places, and partly through the hope that by focusing on these wild spaces I can raise awareness of global warming, climate change and environmental disaster. I gravitate towards natural inspirations because I hope that people will see by work and be struck by the desire to preserve and protect wild natural spaces and animals.

I am also inspired by other artists, everyday life and culture. One of my absolute favourite paintings is William McTaggart’s ‘And All The Choral Waters Sang.’ At the time, he was criticised for painting so loosely that parts of the blank canvas could be seen but I love how bold he was with this painting. I have been to visit it many times in Dundee’s McManus Gallery and every time I see it I’m struck with how real it seems. The waves come alive, I can hear the gulls cry and feel the wind lash my face with salty spray. I will always aspire to paint such a powerful painting as McTaggart did with this one.

Another of my favourite inspirational artists is Frida Kahlo. Her paintings are so raw and her use of symbolism shows the viewer exactly what she’s feeling. Her work was pure expression and feeling and it is glorious. I can’t help but be moved whenever I see her work.

Some current artists that inspire me include Frances Cannon, Derek Myers, Holly Exley, Minnie Small, Owen Hope, Elly Smallwood, Henrik Aa Uldalen, Alistair Horne, Krystle Wright, Irina Cumberland, Shawn Coss, Katie Jobling, Sarah Caudle, Anna Llorens, Marianne Lock and so many many many more.

It’s not always easy to find inspiration; some days are just completely blank. I keep a list of ideas of things I want to practice or things I want to draw for those days when I’m not following a particular idea. Always pay attention to your senses when you are out and about, you never know what can strike inspiration. As director Ian Rickson once said, “Inspiration can come at any time, even after it feels like you haven’t been getting anywhere. Keep your stamina up, don’t force too hard, and trust that you will find your way.”

#art #artist #inspiration #creative #findingart #find #inspire #creativity

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bhawin · 4 years ago

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10 things you should do before turning 30

10 lessons

1. Pamper yourself - you don't have to be like everybody else , when you compare two human being you might analyse the difference. NO, not in physical appearance but probably in thought process and might be in vision. HOW ? , lemme explain , suppose i gave you a word " WINTER " when you asked a group of people to put a view on this word some may compare it with love and other may in sorrow. Similarly, when you talk about yourself you should know how you differentiate yourself from rest of the world , you are special in your own way ,you don't have to be like everybody else. Pamper yourself with treats and gifts when you achieved something.

2. Be ambitious - " A person with vision can do anything " . you should have some aim some path to trail it might be treacherous, beautiful or filled with obstacles. But the tough people never quit , when you become clear with your dream you can easily eliminate negativity and time wastage activity from your dream lens. Life is all about getting new opportunities and distraction on the way but when you are clear about your dreams these are just a small things that you can step on without any dilemma.

3. Meet with new people -we all have dreams , dream about better life , better job , better home, better lover, better society so basically we all are optimistic about our life. Being an introvert till age of 25 i never let people to get into my comfort circle and somehow i lost the luxury of getting loved by people and end up getting no suggestions from other folks because i never shared myself with anyone , but as i grow up i feel i should have someone to whom i can bank upon, with whom i don't have to be fabricated.Friends and family will always give you back to your dreams , when you start reading other people you will analyse life and might be you get prepared for your future self, its so hard to cry in dark and wake up with smile in dawn , when your little paradise is shaking . For me reading and writing always help me to grow myself and i make my diary and having little library at home as my best friend.But a diary will have patience to listen you but unfortunately they never write you back .cherish the friendship and bound that you have with others .

4. Talk with old people - Being a boy who is brought up in a city with chaos and dreams , with remote part of India city called Junagadh I always try my best to analyze the people why they are different what makes them to do a particular thing which society doesn't accept , why they are so different , i always try my best to visit a NGO and spending my birthday at old age home with old people , after spending an hours with them i almost be able to vision my life with future glance , they taught me love , they taught me pain , they make me know that you got leave the things that is bothering and not going to help you in coming 5 years before you get left .

5.Do not expect - expectation leads to disappointment its better not to expect anything from anyone because i know how it feels when you your expectations leaves you stranded and all you left with is sorrow and heavy heart .

6. Play with kids - kids are always most adorable living being to get fancy , when you play with them you be able to get into the world where you were before few years , when you play with them you becomes yourself your judgments your attitude your ego just go banished cuj kids are the purest flower of god.Accept the kids with down syndrome they are the precious stones that everyone should treasure. Kids taught me many lessons like how to get happy without expecting anything from anyone, they have all the freedom to dream because no one have ever taught them about there limitations, when i was 20 i told my mother that maa, i wanted to be a writer , she told me that i cant because i have to study and get into good mba college so that i could have a better future , there is set a bar for me , but when i was 5 years old i told her that i m going to build a castle on sky she was like yes you can do anything , So, is that age set a bar for us or the responsibility ?

7. Do not hurt anyone - sometime i get too hard with myself and ended up by hurting myself only , once i was travelling in a metro, filled with lots of beautiful people i noticed a woman who entered the coach with a beautiful kid , he was screaming so loud and somehow everyone in the metro get disturbed one man came out and shout at lady can you please keep your baby shut , she replied i don't know how to keep him shut i just lost my Mom and dad in a car accident and my husband is deadly injured admitted in comma , could you please help me to keep my kid shut ? , that was the moment when i shattered and every one started showing sympathy but no one actually cares , it might become a story for them .I have a car and i generally travel on it for some work one day i went to market to purchase vegetables and i parked it in the middle of road , i analyze a ambulance is waiting for me to park my car properly , that time i feel so bad due to just 1 min of struggle for parking i m trying to compensate it with someone life in ambulance . I learnt the best lesson that day . what is yours? mail me your response .

8. Easy means difficult - I worked as an analyst and one day my manager asked me to put my creative ideas , think out of the box ,I need innovation. He was so simple but too tough to decode , I have to be clear with my mind about the box , so, what box exactly means ? Its not your brain you cant get out of your brain . Right ? so, Box for me was boundary, A line that i have created for myself .So i asked myself if i actually have to be into that circle or can i go out ? I challenged myself to get the idea and put it in front of my team .Guess what ? My presentation get appreciated by whole team and somehow i cleared it and get the appreciation from all.Everyone try to get into there box why ? cuj getting out of it will bring risk and threat for reputation , that how our mind is framed cuj no one has ever challenged our brain. do you dare to think out of your box? what is your box ?

9. 4 AM - do you know what 4AM looks like ? Heaven , everyone have 24 hours ,but some waste it on sleeping hangouts and doing nothing , get your schedule tight , wake up when the whole world is sleeping , chase your dreams try every single minute that bring you closer to your dreams cuj someone somewhere in the corner of bed is studying is working hard to get your dreams , you have to be one step closer than them . This age is too crucial to build up your dreams . Its totally depend on you if you wanted to waste it or invest it to make your future better . If you struggle for these 5 years your coming rest of the years will be luxurious . Ask yourself what you want .

10. Analyse your environment - It was 24th November of 2018 , Mumbai was covered with the blanket of fogg everything was blur i was standing on the corner of street with some handouts ,I was rush to the place which i love the most . My eyes suddenly got tangled on a man of about 65 in age , he was a walking with his head up with pride , he walked 10 step ahead of me then he suddenly step back and put something from the street and throw it into the bin . I with heavy voice asked him , excuse me? what you just did, Betta (son) he replied, that was needle if someone will walk barefoot that person might get injured , you should analyze things around you and become a leader to lead your society in good way. He taught me a lesson on that day , have you ever pluck a needle from someone life ? when it comes to me i hardly remember anything that i have done anything like this. But, shall we all together become a man like him .

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reryanblogs · 7 years ago

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re:ryan

Hello my fellow adventurers! I’ve been occupied by tons of side quests that I’m coming back only now. Anyway, if you haven’t noticed, I’m going to reboot and rebrand this blog, babam! This was actually formerly known as elachrophant.tumblr.com but decided to kinda change it into a more honest and more “me” self-brand.

I’ve been putting writing this on hold for such a long time. Hmmm, I don’t know why but I want to time it when my mood and emotions are rather neutral. I’m not sure if I’m neutral enough right now thou, considering I just had my third cup of coffee ㅋㅋㅋ.

It’s been years but I’m trying to REALLY do something about my inner conflicts only now. Looking back, they were really just facades and faking, after all; to convince myself and create the illusion that I manage my shit quite well. Well, maybe even right now might still be an act, but at the moment… I don’t care, I guess? Hahaha. I don’t know what sparked inside that I suddenly got all these motivations and inspirations. Maybe a muse finally entranced me. I hope it live inside me forever until I can be a muse to others.

In the lieu of all of these, I established three pillars I can always go back to if I find myself off track.

r e w r i t e | r e v a m p | r e c r e a t e

○rewrite

•I’m actually taking AB Journalism but you don’t know how much I hate writing, hahaha. Well, to be precise, it’s not hate on writing but on physically writing with a pen or typing on a keyboard itself. What a drag, right? Lololol. I want to get back on not just writing, but also reading. I shit you not, I can devour five and more books in just a day back then. The bookworm me died long ago for some unknown reasons. I really miss that ecstatic feeling of travelling to various places, dungeons, dimensions, parallel universe, and just being engrossed to a story through books. I also really want to turn the notes I jotted down: those pieces of ideas, epiphanies, what ifs, and fragments of story concepts, into something that can make people feel the same addicting feeling I felt reading others’ worlds. I only told few about this, but one of my dreams is actually to be a storyboard writer for games. I enjoy playing games, and I played a lot where I felt so involve because of the story line it served. Persona 3, Dragon Nest, these are only few that inspired and amazed me. I want to write more. That’s also one of the reasons why I pushed myself into blogging. With this I can practice not just writing but also letting the chaos inside out of my system. Journaling, too! I had more than ten unused notebooks for journaling but I never really touched them. I used to keep a diary back in elementary, but someone read a rather personal content from it aloud, and it caused a lot of fuss on our section. Woah, I guess that backstory wraps it up why I hated writing, hahaha, we’ve got some introspection going on here right now.

○revamp

•I’m not really good at Math and Sciences. I think that’s why I tend to fall on the artistic spectrum type of person. You know what, I’m gonna claim it! I’M AN ARTIST! I’m still on search for my own style, thou, that’s why I included “revamp”. I know sooooo many artistic and inspiring people both on the internet and “real world” if you may. I’m always wowed and awed by their artworks, and it has this tingling effect inside that screams “I wanna do that, that, and that too.” And since I’m still on search for my own style, I’m incorporating a part of their crafts into mine. Don’t get me wrong thou, it’s not to copy someone else’s work but to get an inspiration from it and turn it into something I can call myself mine. This applies, not just to me but to everyone. Don’t steal someone else’s hard work. If you’re going to use their art, ask their permission, credit them and help them gather the prominence they need and deserve, or if you can afford, buy and support their crafts 😁 Finding my own style… uniqueness is one of the things that always traps me in a rabbit hole of thinking. Brushing your teeth, going to school, sleeping, waking up, and repeating all these boring courses and routines, how can we say that we are unique from one another when at the end of the day, our existence doesn’t really matter and insignificant on a greater scale? I guess this stems from that unreasonable desire of wanting to make a name for myself and leaving a mark on the world. I want to, if not be, at least create something that can inspire and resonate to others ❤

○recreate

•Speaking of creating, I used to think that creating art was just a hobby of mine. But now, I create in order to survive. Therapy? Escape? Salvation? Call it whatever you want. Creating made me able to breathe again. I want to keep creating. I want to put my everything into all of my crafts. They serve as the materialization of my joy, rage, pleasure, sins, punishment, glee, vanity, of every emotion and thoughts I have. They are my desire, insecurities, hostility, and vengeance. My art is both me and not me. They are fragments of myself, for either something that completes me or something that would make me lose myself. No matter what the canvas is, I’d strive to forge something. Stories, design and layout, photographs, makeup, coffee—I want to explore all of them and get the first-hand experience of doing it.

The idea is to “re:ryan” meaning to “ryan again”, to claim my old self back. As much as I hate and cringe over past me, I would say I’m much more happier and bolder back then.

The whole brand also revolves around self-love and self-empowerment and embracing the darkness within one’s self. I want to tell everyone that monsters indeed live within us. It’s embedded to us. It’s what make us humans after all. And it is okay. It’s okay to feel insecure to that rich and pretty girl in your class, it is okay to feel jealous on someone else’s life, it’s okay to feel unreasonably mad about something. The important thing is, being aware of it, and what you do after realizing and accepting the reason of why you’re feeling a certain way. Embrace your darkness, it what makes you who you are. It’s the negative space that makes your passion and personality stand out ❤😁

Yeah… talking about that… I’m admitting something. The first pillar, rewrite… is actually meant for something else. It’s to keep rewriting that letter. I call it the “Letter of No Return”. For years, a temporary logout doesn’t work anymore, more than a reset button, I want to completely terminate my account and delete my character from this crappy game called “Life”. If you ask me, nowadays, I still want to end it all, actually, I don’t really mind if a sudden “Game Over” came flashing to me. But, for some whatever reason it may be, I want to finish this game without regrets, I keep wondering, how strong the “Last Boss” would be, how many shitty and fun side quests would I receive, on what “level” would I reach, how many “EXP points” would I cringe and be proud of. I keep wondering. That’s why I want to keep rewriting that letter. Rewrite and rewrite until I can proudly tear it off and not rely on it as a cheat code to “Esc”.

#word artes #design artes

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elsanish · 5 years ago

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2020

To another anticipate year, 2020. whatever happens in 2019, i hope everyone’s liked it or if not let’s forget about the past and move on. it’s been a while since i write, either in book, or blog, or anywhere. i miss writing in my diary, i never skipped writing my diary since school but, uni life changed me. aaa i hate it. i loooove to write. even to the most foolish things. so today, i’m gonna write anything in my mind// resolutions, achievements, heartbreak, etc.

to 2019 me, which i was 21 years old, and i was in my second year of degree doing physics.. (uhm okay but is it ok to write to my past self. lol nvm) ermmmm what to say. from what i remembered, i did many things for the first time;

160219; i met my sebongs!! oh my god. it was a really roller coaster kinda day. HAHA but it was worth it. i guess. anyways i’m still gonna grateful because i get to witness my eyes see them, and it was free entrance! so i don’t lose anything, except.. it was ot11 huaaa my junhui and minghao :/ i hope i can get to meet them ot13 next!! do i want to write my journey here hm ok malas

300319; i went to jk’s exhibition!!! like finally a jk solo exhibition in my country. hihi i feel like the happiest girl that day. really, i’m so happy!! and i get new friends too, but i didn’t contact them till today.. huhu

310319; i went to a june’s cupsleeve event with freebies!! my own freebies!!

200419; physics dinner!! i sit at the same table with my crush. hell yeah, i really didn’t know he’s coming, and obviously i wouldn’t know where’s his seat because he didn’t replied in the class group. so when i entered the hall, i feel like dreaming and passed out because mf sits the same table with me and the only vacant seat was in front of him. hah.

270419; hellooo i met andi T_T my crush huhuhu ok celeb crush. at freaking kl sentral HAHA ok who wants to miss this ohmygod who missed this she’s insane lol. and it was also a roller coaster ride. hahahah. i was at a cupsleeve event before i met him lol. and i get to witness him sings his 2 songs that i loved the most and it was really near and i was like ok what did i do to deserve this haha i still feels like i’m dreaming y’alls. i also get a video with him :((( though we only have 10 mins to m&g. i pity him. that day, he had to go to 3 events you know. wow must be tiring.

170519; i entered a Korean speech contest!! for beginners. i include bangtan!! hahah i didn’t get any number. but, it’s okay! i still get a certificate, and souvenirs! and experience! and my fav milkiss! hahah. and that’s on my suggestions too, prof asked us what did we want for the foods/drinks since we were fasting that month. so we didn’t get to eat Korean food that day T_T like the years before. sobs.

190519; i met andi for the 2nd time T_T hello, in a span of not even a month, i get to meet him again!! he was near at my house so why would i blow this chance away?!! so i went. i get to take a pic with him!! BUT NO VIDEOS :( and i was too freak out so i didn’t get to think to make a hideous video. so yeah. no vid... but i get to record when i said thanks, and he replied you’re welcome, and i get possessed by listening to that recording. i feel like screaming and when i was thinking about this again, why would i be like this.. //omg am i getting older that i don’t like this kind of behaviour whatsoever hm k

i bought jk slogan and mingyu slogan!! it was my resolution when i went to a concert, but no concert 2019 but i still get them because i can’t resist them so they were taken last year lol.

i went to national art gallery! twice!! lol.

290719; i met alia and ichaa T__T ayy, at first i was planning to meet alia only since we were in our long semester break, and we haven’t met ever since we get out from matriculation college last 2017 huhu. but thennn, when i was waiting for her, she came with icha!! eeee i was too shocked and panicked for a while that i didn’t believe it was icha lol. i took 10 secs to come back to reality and it was really icha! ish. aaa and that concludes my happiest day!! couldn’t be more happy than that day, oh but i’m a bummer because i can’t join sleepover together ugh.

070819; Bring The Soul the movie! AND MY FIRST PIERCING

180919; i went to national nuclear agency hee. for my final year project purpose. omg and i haven’t contact them till today.

091119; i went to Malacca with my classmates!

151219; i went to Twins of Faith 2019 with farah! <3 really, it was a good experience despite i went one on Sunday since they had 2 days events sobs. and i met quiah too hehe.

sooo, that’s what i can recall, hihi. i hope 2020 can be better! for me and everyone!! i really have the urge to hurt people idk argh since i let too much hurt people lend to me. and cliche cliche, new year new me😜

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midoridragonuus · 7 years ago

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< previous | compendium | next >

- x -

from: [email protected] to: [email protected] cc: maeharamahouji subject: hey

hey gabe can you log into siims? thanks

- Secretary and Head of Divisions, Ellie Schwartz

- x -

from: [email protected] to: [email protected] cc: subject: RE: hey

hey elliepop! u ok??? this doesnt sound like one of ur usual mails dont think ive ever seen u write wo grammar n punctuation also y cc that guy

- gabe bar owner. business guy. stud.

- x -

from: [email protected] to: [email protected] cc: subject: FWD: RE: hey

ellie? gurl whats ^ reply soon i miss u

- gabe bar owner. business guy. stud.

- x -

from: [email protected] to: [email protected] cc: subject: FWD: FWD: RE: hey

ok ok ill be right on dont b mad at me ily

- gabe bar owner. business guy. stud.

- x -

gabe69 has signed into the Schwartz Ind. Internal Messaging System (SIIMS)

gabe69: hello??? anyone here?? woo hoo????

schwartzellie has signed into the Schwartz Ind. Internal Messaging System (SIIMS)

gabe69: ellie! hey honeybuns. ive missed u whats ^

gabe69: ellie?

maeharamahouji has signed into the Schwartz Ind. Internal Messaging System (SIIMS)

gabe69: whats going on here

maeharamahouji has uploaded a file: sserver470.exe

maeharamahouji: hey gabe. can you test this for me? thanks. send me a report when you're done.

gabe69: what

maeharamahouji has signed out of the Schwartz Ind. Internal Messaging System (SIIMS)

gabe69: whats going on

gabe69: ellie cmon what the hell

schwartzellie: Click the file, stupid.

schwartzellie has signed out of the Schwartz Ind. Internal Messaging System (SIIMS)

gabe69: fuck

gabe69 has signed out of the Schwartz Ind. Internal Messaging System (SIIMS)

- x -

> initializing sserver470.exe > protocol and logs will be erased upon exit > "hope it helps. - m."

gabe69 has signed into SSERVER470

gabe69: what is this place?

schwartzellie: Oh thank the Gods.

gabe69: elliepop? what the entire fuck is going on?????

schwartzellie: Look. I couldn't talk to you sooner. I wanted to. I really did. I couldn't... I was afraid to contact you.

gabe69: what? y? whats wrong with me? hon if u didnt want a follow up

schwartzellie: It's not you. It's who's listening. I'm pretty sure my office is bugged. My phone is too. I've had to be really careful with what I say in case it's distorted. I don't know how to explain it better than that.

gabe69: ellie i dont get what ur saying can u start at the top?

schwartzellie: Okay. Okay. Do you remember a few weeks ago when Carlos interrupted our dinner and told me it was an emergency?

gabe69: vaguely. i remember his smug ass ruining a nite w ur beautiful face ♥♥♥

schwartzellie: Right so, I went with him. He was silent through the whole walk to the archives.

gabe69: the archives?

schwartzellie: Yeah. Where we keep files on literally everyone and everything. You know. Contracts. Secret info? Well, we got stopped by security, so I know there's at least one witness out there that knows we entered the archives; that the whole thing really took place.

gabe69: what do u mean "took place" ???

schwartzellie: Shut up and let me type!

gabe69: k

schwartzellie: So we entered, and we walked into the middle of the room. I'm not sure if it was the exact middle or anything, but that's what it felt like neck deep in the rows of file cabinets and servers. Anyway, the archives are heavily guarded. I'm pretty shocked he had clearance but in hindsight, but also? Not really. I told you his files were a fucking mess and his permissions were probably redacted as well.

gabe69: uh huh

schwartzellie: There's cameras all over. Lasers. Devil's traps. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if any flat surface read DNA or heat signatures or something. Schwartz is really out-there about security. I mean, there's less than a handful of people who can get into the archives, and they're 99% accompanied by Schwartz herself.

gabe69: sounds high key

schwartzellie: It is. As far as I know, the only people with permissions to enter the archives are Schwartz, Irkalla, myself, and now... Carlos. It's under such heavy security that two people on shift have to watch it. One physically, and the other in a special cam room somewhere on site. Like... it's really guarded.

gabe69: and u 2 just waltzed in there huh?

schwartzellie: Yeah. And when we got to the middle, he just stood there and wouldn't look me in the eyes. He literally titled his head back and locked eyes with one of the, what I assume was, a camera. Stared into it the whole time we talked.

gabe69: what a fuckin weirdo. whatd he tell u babe?

schwartzellie: I don't.... I don't really remember. I was so weirded out by the whole experience... I remember getting goosebumps. My stomach hurt. I was feeling pretty nauseous and

gabe69: ok but it wasnt my food so

schwartzellie: Oh my Gods, I didn't say it was!

gabe69: just makin sure ;)

schwartzellie: Ugh. But...

gabe69: but?

schwartzellie: I remember staring at him really intense-like. Squinting and trying to figure out what his motive was. What he was saying. Like, his mouth was moving and words were coming out, but my brain couldn't figure out what they were! I even tried to remember later on, but none of the sounds or words I made felt right. I don't even remember leaving, or how I got back to my room... I slept with a diary that night in case I remembered anything in my sleep, but my dreams were blank. When I went to the security office, there was no record of us visiting the archives. And the guy on duty who stopped us outside the door? Gone. Vanished. I asked around and no one knew of anyone who matched that description ever working at SI. No one knew who I was talking about, and by then, his face was too blurry in my memory to ask again. After a few days of frustration, I asked Jade to help me. He reads lips, you know. So I tried to make the same movements I remembered Carlos making with his mouth, but Jade had no idea what I was trying to say. He said it was just gibberish.

gabe69: ellie this is fucking weird

schwartzellie: I know.

gabe69: so what ur telling me is that that dick took u 2 a place w heavy security did some mumbo jumbo magic shit that u cant remember and now ur phones being bugged and a guys missing???

schwartzellie: No, there's more to it than that. I think...

gabe69: ???

schwartzellie: So I tried to do some more digging about him, in hopes that it might.... I don't know... tell me something? Anything? But then more people disappeared.

gabe69: what do u mean? who disappeared?

schwartzellie: I... don't know.

gabe69: then how do u kno theyre gone??

schwartzellie: I have a list of employees on my desk for the monthly newsletter that have left the company. We publish goodbyes every month, but I don't remember any of them on this month's letter ever working here.

gabe69: well SI is a big company! surely a few slip by ur ever watchful eyes. u cant do everything doll

schwartzellie: No, but I sign every employment contract as Schwartz' witness. Even when they're mostly redacted. I've seen every person who enters this company, including business partners in different districts, contracted/affiliated help, and even have the names for people who work FOR our associates. But I don't know any of these names or faces.

gabe69: and ur sure they worked for SI

schwartzellie: The list is from Schwartz. I'm sure of that. But even she's been... off? There's something going on with her too. She won't reply to any non-related business mail.

gabe69: and ur surprised by that of all things?? ms unfeeling not talking about feelings?

schwartzellie: Well, no, but you don't know her, Gabe. It's like she's shutting down.

gabe69: uh huh

schwartzellie: With SI off the table, I told Wendy I had to look up something in Crowley's office, so I shadowed her to work. I wanted to check if maybe the city had those names on file, somewhere. They didn't.

gabe69: and?

schwartzellie: What they did have, though, was a blank space where those names SHOULD be. I don't think the person who was supposed to clean up got rid of the dividers.

gabe69: elliepop this is nuts like wacky pistachi kiddo! people fuck up on putting dividers in. it happens. i sometimes order double my stock on accident

schwartzellie: Okay, one? Wasteful. Two? I know I sound paranoid, okay? I know it. But something's going on. There's more, okay?

gabe69: more?

schwartzellie: Yeah.... After I left Crowley's office, Wendy stopped me on my way out. She asked if I found what I needed, and I told her I did. As she turned around to go back to work, I saw something around the corner. At first I thought it was a shadow. Maybe my eyes playing tricks on me. Shit happens, right? But I know someone was watching me.

gabe69: ellie

schwartzellie: No, listen! So I.... I didn't go straight home. I decided to take the bus, rather than get a cab, just in case. Better safe than sorry, right? And as I was waiting at the bus stop, I felt eyes on the back of my head.

gabe69: ellie....

schwartzellie: Gabe will you shut the fuck up? I know I sound crazy, but just let me finish. Please. You owe me this.

gabe69: ok elliecakes. im sorry :((

schwartzellie: I felt really antsy, rocking back and forth. I knew someone was watching me. I just knew it, okay? So I get on the next bus, not knowing where it was going. If someone was really following me, they probably wouldn't go somewhere random, right? Risk being seen by a lot of people? Turns out the next stop wasn't too far from Karen's, so I got off there. I went in, grabbed a latte, and sat down until my nerves returned to normal. I thought I was also being pretty ridiculous and letting weird events turn me into some sort of conspiracy theorist. Half way through my drink, I looked up and... there was nothing wrong. I didn't feel anyone looking. There were just some random people in there eating breakfast and drinking coffee. I was so relieved. Honestly, I felt so stupid.

gabe69: :( i love ur smarts

schwartzellie: So I paid my bill, and waited for the next bus. I rode back to SI, got off, and felt like a huge idiot for being so nervous. I was home! No reason to feel afraid when we have the best security in the District. I waved to Kat and sat in the lobby for a minute with weak knees. Like, I was just really relieved it was all in my head.

gabe69: that sounds good

schwartzellie: Until

gabe69: o

schwartzellie: I checked my phone for any alerts I might have missed while snooping, or trying to chill in Karen's. A few e-mails, a few texts, and then one weird notif from an iSpy app? But... I never installed anything like that. I checked my apps, but there wasn't one installed on the phone or the SD card. I started to get really freaked again. I mean, iSpy? Of all the alerts that could be the result of some virus or something... So I took the next elevator to the Tech Division. Mahouji was on shift, so I gave him my phone to look at.

gabe69: let me guess he found something

schwartzellie: He sure fucking did. He ran a scan while I was standing right there. The first one didn't pick up anything, but I insisted that there was something on it that I didn't put in there. After another unsuccessful scan, he ran his own with his.... I don't know. Whatever it is he works with. Personal code or program or something? I don't know. But he looked really disturbed. He fiddled with it, then downloaded an iSpy game from the app store.

gabe69: what

schwartzellie: Yeah, I was really confused too. He explained to me that it was probably just an advertisement for a new game that was mass spammed from a link I might have clicked and that, with the actual app in, he was able to turn off the notifications. But that's what he said, not what he showed me.

gabe69: what i dont get it

schwartzellie: While he was telling me all this and pointing my phone at me with his left hand, he pulled some paper and a pencil out of his own desk and wrote on it with his right hand. "Ellie, there's a nasty program on here. I don't know what it is, but I know it's not something anyone should tamper with. I don't even want to try to debug it. It has access to everything, including your cam and mic. Getting rid of the phone will only make whoever's watching suspicious. I recommend playing dumb while I investigate."

gabe69: holy shit

schwartzellie: I... I thanked him and left. I thought that it might just be a huge prank on me, but I don't think he's that kind of guy. I mean, we're not close friends or anything, but of all the people in this company? I think I can trust him.

gabe69: u sure u dont trust him just bc he validates w/e ur thinking is going on

schwartzellie: So you don't believe me?

gabe69: no elliecakes its not that. u kno im always on ur side. i just gotta play devils advocate yea???

schwartzellie: Yeah. Yeah. So.... Like.... I took the phone with me. I tried to keep it pointed away from me unless I had a message. I've been really jumpy and trying not to give too much info away in my emails or texts. I've tried changing my writing to kinda make it seem like it might not be me in case I disappear so people can figure out the dates things went wrong.

gabe69: ellie wtf nothings gonna happen 2 u. not when im around. i promise. u kno that.

schwartzellie: No, but-

gabe69: that y u emailed me the way u did earlier??

schwartzellie: Yeah, I wanted to leave a trail, okay? So anyone else who looked into it could tell something was up and I wasn't just making things up. And I thought that things were finally going back to normal, you know? I wanted things to be less weird, and they were, until earlier today.

gabe69: what happened??

schwartzellie: I was coming back to my office. I was thinking about finally getting back to my social life.

gabe69: so me

schwartzellie: Sure.

gabe69: :( cmon u love me

schwartzellie: Sure.

gabe69: ;*

schwartzellie: And on the way, I saw a guy standing in front of one of the windows in the hall. I didn't recognize him, so I asked him who he was. He didn't answer. I asked again, and still nothing. So I approached him from the side.

gabe69: ellie!

schwartzellie: I know it wasn't the smartest thing. Approaching some rando? But he was weird. Out of place weird. Because I know all of the employees. I know who has access to my floor. And this guy! Was just standing there! Looking out the window! I sent a text to security as a precaution, and then went to tap him on the shoulder. Then I blinked, and the window was broken. Alarms were going off. There was a woman screaming from below. The wind blew my hair out of place! I remember the tears coming down my face at the shock because what the fuck just happened?

gabe69: wtf i dont remember any alarm

schwartzellie: My legs gave out, and after a few seconds, I crawled to the window to look out. I was expecting to see the guy on the pavement below, you know? All bloody and broken and... yeah... But the window was fine.

gabe69: what

schwartzellie: The window! Was fine! It wasn't broken. There was no one below but regular day traffic! I was still on the floor, still with tears, but nothing happened? I checked my phone for the text I sent and it was in my drafts folder, saying "Message failed to send. Try again." I called the security office to ask for video of the hall, and got sent a video where I just walk by the window like nothing happened. Then I come back, sit down, and cry.

gabe69: ellie

schwartzellie: Gabe, please. Please just... I'm almost done.

gabe69: ok

schwartzellie: I called Mahouji and asked him to come pick me up from the hallway. He thought it was weird, because one? He was asleep. Two? We're not friends. Not really. And three? He's def. not security. So he was concerned.

gabe69: yea so am i y didnt u call me babe??

schwartzellie: Because when he got there, I showed him the video and told him that I must have not been paying attention because I was playing my iSpy app. He's smart enough to figure out the hidden meaning there. He asked if I needed to go to see a doctor in case I hurt anything falling down, but I told him that no, I'd be alright, but I did want to see you. Privately.

gabe69: oh hon hon hon baguette

schwartzellie: Can you be serious for one fucking second? Like, this is my life, Gabe!

gabe69: sorry go on

schwartzellie: Again, being the smart man he is,

gabe69: >:|

schwartzellie: he figured out what I meant. Told me that maybe it wouldn't be smart to go see someone if I was dizzy from the fall, and that I should message you instead using his computer.

gabe69: that y i had 2 click that weird file?

schwartzellie: Yeah. It's something he made to delete all records after we're done talking. It's safer that way. Because Gabe? I'm scared.

gabe69: ellie....

schwartzellie: I'm really scared. I don't know what to do now. Mahouji told me to try and back off. To forget the whole thing.

gabe69: suspicious

schwartzellie: No, I think he's really just concerned. He doesn't seem weird? Not like that hallway guy. Not like Carlos. I think he's worried. I think he knows there's something going on but I don't think he knows how weird it is. How twisted it is? There's something going on, Gabe, and it's so big. People are disappearing. Things are happening and not happening at the same time. Schwartz is off. I'm going crazy. There's something going on and someone who's not this deep in needs to know before I don't know anymore. Does that make sense?

gabe69: ellie where r u? u still in the tech div?

schwartzellie has signed out of SSERVER470

gabe69: fuck

gabe69 has signed out of SSERVER470

>initializing shut down of sserver470.exe >initializing self-deletion sequence >del470.exe in progress, authorization m confirm >ERROR >ERROR >ERROR >ERROR >ERROR >ERROR

- x -

from: [email protected] to: [email protected] cc: subject: HEY

um where are u elliepop? wanna get a coffee? nite cap? ;))

- gabe bar owner. business guy. stud.

- x -

from: [email protected] to: [email protected] cc: subject: RE: HEY

Downstairs at the cafeteria. Why? Wanna join? lol

- Secretary and Head of Divisions, Ellie Schwartz

- x -

from: [email protected] to: [email protected] cc: subject: RE: HEY

error

- Secretary and Head of Divisions, Ellie Schwartz

- x -

#drabble #c:ellie #c:gabe #c:mahouji #long post

10 notes · View notes

victimofthemusic · 7 years ago

Text

Music, Cars and Pizza, Of Course (With M&M’s)-A Princess Diaries Fic

Hi guys! It’s been so long since I’ve posted anything on here and for that, I’m sorry. My life has been hectic and I’ve been taking some time off from writing, but I’m slowly getting back into again. I’ve got a few things in the works, but I decided to take a detour from my usual and I’ve become OBSESSED with the Princess Diaries and I’ve been marathoning the movie and now I’m reading the series, which is great by the way! Hopefully you guys like this and let me know what you think! :)

Summary:

"Like a date?"

"No, not a date, just music, cars-"

"Will it include pizza?"

"Of course, pizza's a given."

"With M&M's?'

"Of course."

"Well, then I'm in."

A simple 'what if' Mia had realized her mistake of ditching Michael for Josh and that apology pizza came a little sooner.

~~~~~~~~~~

Mia fluttered nervously around her room, digging through her dressers, flipping through her closet, trying to find something, anything to wear that wouldn't make her look like an asparagus like the current fashion faux pas she was wearing. Which, she supposed, was a shame considering she always liked this top on her. Now, however, all she’d see when she looked at it was a gangly green vegetable.

Her mother was watching her, with thinly veiled amusement, from her position on the love seat, pretending to sketch. However, Mia hadn't heard the scratching of her pencil across the page of her sketch book in last fifteen minutes.

She pretended not to notice.

“I guess I’ll just wear my blue suit.” Mia sighed, digging said swim suit out from underneath a pile of clothes that had been flung haphazardly from her dresser not five minutes ago, in her haste to find something that didn’t remind her of one of the main food groups.

“Are you nervous about the beach party?” Her mother asked after a beat of silence.

Mia opened her mouth to answer, when her eyes landed on a picture taped to her dresser mirror. It was taken last year, at her fifteenth birthday party. Her mom had been away for the weekend, an art dealer that had just opened a new museum in LA had fallen in love with a line of her mother’s paintings and had begged her to come out for opening night of the new exhibit that now housed Helen’s paintings. Helen had initially refused, but Mia knew how much her mother’s art meant to her and after much persuading and an offer for Mia to stay at the Moscovitz’s for the weekend, Helen took the offered trip to LA, but not after promising Mia something special for her birthday.

Mia was just expecting a quiet weekend with Lilly, helping her edit her TV show or make flyers to plaster around school concerning her passion about a new cause. And when she got tired of that, she’d wander down to Michael’s room, and help him write a new song for his band or watch an old black and white film with him, the only person, beside her mother, who shared her affection for old films.

However, when she crossed over the threshold of the Moscovitz’s townhouse that Friday evening, she was greeted with streamers and balloons and a ‘Happy Birthday Mia!’ banner strung across the fireplace in the living room. Lilly was standing next to a smirking Michael and had rushed over to give Mia a hug, guiding Mia further into the living room. The lights had been dimmed, music was playing from the state of the art stereo system and the kitchen had been transformed into a small buffet with a small birthday cake nestled in the middle amidst all the snacks and soda.

Michael had invited his band and Lilly had invited their friends from choir and Mia had found herself at a loss for words, incredibly touched by her friends kindness.

Lilly, who among her many other hobbies, dabbled in photography and had snapped a picture of Mia and Michael, nestled together on the couch while Michael was trying (without much success) to teach Mia how to play guitar. Neither one of them had been paying much attention to anyone, let alone a sleuthing Lilly armed with a camera. It was taken a few minutes before Michael had given Mia her birthday present, a silver chain bracelet with a dainty silver charm in the shape of a guitar pick on it. He said he’d found in the antique store next to the garage and when he’d saw it, he thought of her. Mia, incredibly touched, had never taken the bracelet off.

Lilly had given her a copy of the picture the week after and Mia had shifted a few pictures around on her dresser and it now hung proudly in the center of all of her photos, where she could see it every day. Usually, when she looked at Michael’s warm smile, the smile he always wore before he started that slow, deep laugh that only occurred when he was genuinely amused by something—and Mia attempting a G Chord on the guitar? Definitely cause for such laugher—filled her with such a warmth that sometimes, she forget that she was invisible.

Now, when she remembered the look of disappointment in Michael’s eyes when she told him she was going to the beach party with Josh instead of spending time with Michael on their date that wasn't a date—with just music, cars and of course, pizza (with M&M’s) that was a complete given—she was filled with nothing but guilt.

Her mother cleared her throat and Mia remembered that her mother had asked her a question and usually, when one asks you a question, you generally have to respond with an answer.

“No,” She found herself saying, “I’m not nervous, more excited, I think.”

Mia bit her lip, smiling shyly at her mom, “I think I might actually get my first, real kiss tonight.”

Her mother raised an eyebrow, her eyes glinting in a way that made Mia suddenly nervous, “Oh? Who from?”

Mia shifted, her cheeks turning a bright red, “Josh Bryant.”

Her mother’s eyes hardened, narrowing into slits, “That Backstreet Boy clone who you’ve had a crush on forever?” she demanded, pursing her lips.

It was never a good sign, when Helen Thermopolis pursed her lips.

“He’s not a Backstreet Boy clone,” Mia sniffed defensively, “he’s a…a sailor.” she added lamely.

“I thought he was never nice to you.” Helen added, her eyes suddenly filling with concern. Mia shifted, suddenly very uncomfortable with the topic of conversation. Instead of meeting her mother’s eyes, she pretended to be looking for something amongst the mess on her dresser.

“Well, I don’t know, he is now.” Mia said softly, but the answer sounded weak, unsure, even to her own ears.

After Mia had floated back down from Cloud 9 and after Josh’s voice had faded from her mind, where it had been playing him asking her to the beach party on a constant loop, Mia’s insecurities had reared their ugly head. The truth was, Josh had never been nice to her. He’d never even spared her a second glance before her whole Extreme Princess Makeover, unless it was to join in on the teasing that was often lead by his equally as snotty girlfriend, Lana.

So she had been curious where the sudden change of heart had come from, especially when just the day before, he’d been swapping spit with Lana and ignoring her very existence. She had wondered, for a brief moment, if all of this wasn't just some publicity stunt, to be linked with the newly discovered princess.

She had dismissed those thoughts, thinking that she was just being insecure, that it was okay Josh had a change of heart and that maybe, her little makeover had just made him realize what he’d been missing out all along.

Doubt, once again, filled her mind and eyeing the bracelet that Michael had given her that, for the first time she had been given it, was laying innocently in her jewelry box, the silver glinting in the fading after noon sun, she wondered, not for the first time in the last few days, if she was making the right choice.

“Mia? Honey, you better hurry up and change if you want to make it in time for your bus, Joe should be here in a few minutes to take you to school.”

Her mother’s voice brought Mia out of her thoughts and nodding absentmindedly, she hurried into the bathroom and changed into her blue bathing suit, that, once Mia had looked into the mirror to make sure she looked okay, deiced that it didn’t make her look like one of the major food groups.

It made her look like a Smurf.

~~~~~~~~~~

Josh, Mia had decided, was one of the most boring people she had ever met.

She had been in his presence for all of an hour and the only topics of conversation Josh seemed to be well versed in was boating, hair gel and talking about his ex-girlfriend, Lana.

Mia was miserable, to say the least and had never wanted an evening to come to an end quicker more than this one. She didn’t think she could last another five minutes in his company, let alone anther three or four hours or until Josh decided he wanted to leave.

And to make matters worse, whenever Josh or one of his buddies cracked some lame joke, all she could picture was what Michael would say to such asinine comments and thinking of Michael only made the guilt weigh heavier in her stomach. She wondered what he was doing right now, if he had continued with band practice, if he was working on her ‘Stang with all the concentration and careful preciseness he gave to his music or if he was at home, writing or watching a movie.

Or maybe, he found someone else to spend his Saturday night with, maybe the pretty blonde band groupie that was always hanging around the garage, flirting with Michael in between songs or cornering him after practice, when he’d start to work on her ‘Stang.

The thought made Mia hurt in a way that she had never felt before. Her heart physically ached at the thought of Michael being with someone else, of sharing his new music with somebody else. That had always been their thing and the thought of it not being their thing anymore, made tears spring to her eyes and her guilt worsen.

And it was in that moment, when she was slow dancing on a beach, underneath the moon light with sound of the waves crashing in the distance with Josh Bryant, something she’d only dreamed of doing for the last year, that she was with the wrong guy.

The thought made her stop so suddenly that Josh ended up stepping on her foot, but she didn’t even feel it. Her sudden stop interrupted Josh’s story of Lana and the first Christmas they had spent together and while it was such a riveting story, it was one Mia didn’t care to stick around for.

“Mia? What—“

“I have to go.” Mia said abruptly and that was all the explanation she gave a rather confused and annoyed Josh Bryant before she made a mad dash to her bag, digging through her belongings until she found the slim silver cellphone that Joe had given her before letting her board the bus.

“I don’t trust this over-gelled Backstreet Boy clone,” he explained gruffly when he handed it to her.

Mia, too stunned that Joe even knew who the Backstreet Boys were, didn’t even protest when he pressed it into her hand and through her shock, she heard him tell her to press one and it would dial his number and to call him if she needed him.

Pressing one, the phone automatically dialed Joe’s number and he answered on the first ring.

“Joe? It’s Mia, can you pick me up? There’s some place I need to be.”

~~~~~

Mia shifted nervously outside Doc’s garage, the warm pizza box tipping precariously in her grasp and with quick reflexes she didn’t know she possessed, she saved her peace offering/apology pizza from becoming a new welcome mat.

The bay doors were closed, which she expected this late at night and if it wasn’t for the faint guitar strumming she could hear coming from the inside, she would've thought that no one was here.

She knocked on the metal doors and cringed at the loud sound breaking the silence of the neighborhood around her. When the clanging died down, she could hear a pause in the guitar strumming and a beat of silence, then the metal door rose slowly, squeaking loudly on the tracks and if it wasn't for the pizza box in Mia’s hand, she would've covered her ears.

They stopped about half way, enough for someone to duck under and Mia didn’t have enough time to work herself up into a proper panic before a familiar head of dark hair popped out from underneath the door and then Michael was standing in front of her, arms crossed and unwavering stare in place.

“Hi,” Mia said, giving him a small, unsure smile.

Michael didn’t reply, so Mia took that as a sign to continue.

“Look, I’m probably the last person you wanna see right now,” she began quietly, “but I came here to apologize for choosing to go to the beach party with Josh instead of being here, with you,” she looked down at the pizza box, suddenly feeling very exposed underneath Michael’s gaze, “Josh is, well, Josh is a total idiot and the shallow end of a kiddie pool has more depth than he does and it wasn't until after his sixth story about Lana, that I realized that I had made a mistake. If I’m being honest, I knew I made a mistake the minute I accepted his offer. I got so caught up in the fact that Josh Bryant wanted to take me on a date, that Josh Bryant might want to kiss me—“

Had Mia paid attention, she would've noticed the way Michael’s jaw clenched at the latter admission, but she couldn't seem to take her eyes off of the pizza in her hands.

“—and I chose to ignore the fact that up until two days ago, the only reason Josh Bryant even knew I existed was because his girlfriend loves to make me the butt end of her jokes.” Mia scoffed, rolling her eyes, but Michael didn’t miss the hurt in her voice and not for the first time, anger rose at the thought of anyone teasing her.

“I know I hurt you,” Mia said, risking a glance up at him from underneath her lashes, “but I’m hoping, that even though I showed up late and it took me longer than it should have, your offer for music, cars and pizza still stands,” glancing down at her still full hands, she offered the pizza box out to Michael, “I brought the pizza.” she said lamely, giving him a sheepish smile.

“You forgot the M&M’s.” He said after a minute of silence, before turning and ducking underneath the garage door.

Mia’s shoulders sagged in relief and she waved Joe away, who was waiting patiently by the limo and with a simple nod, he got into the driver’s seat and drove away, but not before Mia caught the little smile on his face.

Mia took Michael’s statement as an offer for her to follow him and being very, very careful, she ducked underneath the garage doors and offered the pizza to a waiting Micael, who set the pizza on an oil drum so he could close the bay doors with a loud clang that made Mia jump.

“Sorry,” he said, giving her an apologetic smile before he grabbed the pizza and made his way over to one of the couches where he set up camp, his acoustic guitar leaning up against the couch and an open notebook laying out on the coffee table. He closed it before she could see what was in it, shoving it off to the side before setting the pizza down where his notebook had been.

He opened the box and huffed out a laugh at the Sorry that was written out on top of the otherwise plain cheese pizza in different colored M&M’s.

“I didn’t forget.” Mia said softly, giving him a small smile.

Michael smiled back, shaking his head, “You’re something else, Thermopolis.”

Mia flushed bright red, but there was no denying the small smile on her lips or the flutter her heart gave when he gave her a smile like that.

Michael managed to scrounge up some paper plates and napkins and, after snagging a couple of sodas out of the fridge Doc kept just outside of his office for his employees, he sat back down on the couch next to Mia. He offered her one of the sodas and a plate, which she accepted with a grateful smile. She didn’t hesitate to open up the pizza box and after a few seconds of deliberation on what slice she wanted, Michael watching in fond amusement, she picked one and took a bite, not even bothering to scrape off the M&M’s, she was that hungry.

“What, Josh didn’t feed you?” Michael asked, picking his own piece and taking a bite. The question came out innocent enough, but Mia could hear the mocking underneath the attempted casualness of his tone.

Suddenly feeling self-conscious, setting her slice of pizza down on her plate, shaking her head, she said, “No, um, I took the bus with everyone else and I wasn’t there long enough to hit the snack table.”

Michael hmm’d, chewing his pizza thoughtfully, but didn’t add anything else to the conversation.

They sat in silence and Mia couldn't help but feel a little awkward. She wasn’t sure if Michael had completely forgiven her yet and if she was being honest with herself, she wasn't sure if he would. And Mia could understand, really, if she was in his shoes and Michael had canceled their date that wasn’t a date, to hang out with someone else, she’d be a little hurt too.

He deserves better, she thought to herself.

Because, if Mia was also being honest with herself, she had always cared about Michael a little more than just a ‘he’s-my-best-friends-older-brother-so-by-extention-I-have-to-care-about-him’ sort of way. She’d known Michael as long as she’d known Lilly and while Mia loved Lilly dearly—really, she did, there wasn't a thing on this earth Mia wouldn’t do for her best friend—she could be a bit, well, much sometimes. Lilly was Mia’s opposite in every way and sometimes, Lilly could be a bit harsh with her criticism of Mia. Mia knew that she meant well, she was always trying to protect Mia from the cruelty of some of their classmates and encourage her to stand up to other people and not be so concerned about what other people think of her. But still, sometimes, her critiques hurt.

And Michael, bless him, never hesitated to come to Mia’s defense where Lilly was concerned. Michael was a lot like Mia, quiet and reserved and it wasn’t unusual for Michael to stay locked up in his room all day, working on his music or reading or down in the Moscovitzs’ garage, music blasting and tinkering around with his parent’s cars. When Lilly got too much to handle, Mia wouldn't hesitate to wander down to the garage and hangout with Michael. Michael, quiet and reserved Michael, had a way of making shy, awkward Mia, open up and feel normal, for once in her life. He never rolled his eyes in annoyance when Mia went off on one of her rants when she got excited over a new book she’d read or a new movie she’d watched with her mother. They shared common interests in music and books and movies and Michael always had this way of making her laugh, with his quick wit and dry and sarcastic remarks that could render even Lilly speechless. He always exuded a calm and collected demeanor and it always soothed Mia’s often frazzled nerves and one look or one smile from him and it could make Mia forget about whatever hurtful remark one of her fellow classmates said about her.

He’s always been more than just her best friend’s older brother to her and maybe it was selfish, knowing she’d hurt him so badly, but she didn’t want to lose him.

“I can practically hear you thinking from over here, princess,” Michael said, his tone teasing. She looked up from her pizza—which other than the one bite she’d taken almost ten minutes prior, had remained untouched—to see Michael gazing at her from underneath his dark fringe. Behind the teasing, she could see genuine concern swimming in those unfathomably dark brown eyes. After all she had done to him, he was concerned about her.

Her

He really, really deserves better.

“Michael, I—“She started, but stopped. She wasn't sure what she wanted to say, but looking down at her pizza, she suddenly wasn’t hungry anymore.

“Didn’t you promise me music?” Mia asked instead, standing up so abruptly she almost knocked over her soda and if it wasn't for Michael’s quick reflexes, it would've ended up all over the half eaten pizza. She blushed bright red, hurrying over to the stereo system in the corner of the room, flipping through the stacks of CD’s Doc’s had to offer. She chose a CD at random and put it in the CD player, the Red Hot Chilli Peppers filling the silent garage. She pretended to be engrossed in the back of Def Leppard’s Greatest Hits album when she heard Michael get up from the couch and make his way over to her.

He plucked the CD out of her hands, setting it down on the table where the other ones were scattered, ignoring Mia’s protest.

“You hate Def Leppard.” He said in response to her protests, leaning casually against the table, crossing his arms across his chest.

“You don’t know that.” Mia sniffed, picking the CD back up.

Michael rolled his eyes, taking it away from her, again, “I do, because every time Felix puts this CD in when you’re here, you scrunch your nose up and start rubbing your temples, like you have a headache.”

“And here I thought you were supposed to be working on my car, not studying me.” Mia quipped, giving him a teasing smile.

If Mia didn’t know any better, she would've swore Michael’s cheeks turned a soft shade of pink, but it was hard to tell in the shadowed lighting of the garage.

“Speaking of your car, I uh, finished it for you.” Michael said, changing the subject, pushing himself off of the table and walking over to where her ‘Stang was parked. Mia followed, excitement building in her stomach at the thought of driving the beautiful car her mother had worked so hard to get for her. Two of her best paintings, which Mia knew she could sell for a pretty penny, had been traded in order for Mia to have the car of dreams.

Michael lifted the hood and began explaining what all he’d done, things Mia had absolutely no grasp or concept of, but she listened with rapt attention, following his finger as he pointed out each section of the car that had been either rebuilt, repaired or tweaked in order for her car to purr like Fat Louie when you scratched at a spot just behind his ears.

She was at a loss for words and once again, she was struck by just how perfect Michael Moscovitz was. And how stupid she was not realize it sooner.

“—and when I test drove it, I noticed it was slipping a bit in third, so I had to take the transmission out and dig around with a flash light in order to find what was wrong and it turns out it was just something loose—“

He glanced up during his explanation, dark eyes glittering with pride and excitement and that’s when Mia knew. Like really knew.

She was in love with Michael Moscovitz.

And it was there, in the middle of Doc’s garage, bent under the hood of her ‘Stang, that she kissed Michael Moscovitz.

The guy she loved

It didn’t last longer than five seconds, maybe, but in those five seconds, she felt it. The warmth of his lips, slightly chapped from biting them when he was really concentrating, the stubble on his cheek from not shaving recently and the way her heart fluttered at all of these sensations hitting her at once.

She pulled away, looking anywhere but at him, surprised at her actions and mortified that she practically assaulted him, because her actions couldn’t of been wanted. This was Michael, Lilly’s older brother, her best friend.

SHE JUST KISSED HER BEST FRIEND’S OLDER BROTH—

“Mia.” Michael breathed, bringing her out of her momentary panic and when she glanced up at him shyly, he simply stared at her, dumbfounded before his expression melted into something else. His eyes, dark with something Mia couldn't name, glanced down to her lips and before Mia could even blink, let alone think, Michael was kissing her.

Kissing.

Her.

His lips were warm and pressed firmly to hers, his hands coming up to cradle her cheeks, tilting her head slightly to the left and oh. Gently, his lips began to move against hers, encouraging Mia to follow his lead and she did, chasing his lips with a fervor that warmed her from the inside out. Fireworks exploded behind her eyelids, igniting a heat that settled low in her belly, her cheeks flushing and just like in the old movies, she felt her foot slowly rise and this was it, her first, real, foot popping kiss.

Michael pulled away slowly, thumbs brushing against her cheeks and when Mia opened her eyes, slightly dazed, Michael was staring down at her with a look of wonder on his face, that if her cheeks could, they’d be flushing redder than they already were.

“Why me?” he murmured, brushing back a stray tendril of her newly straightened hair, tucking it behind her ear.

There were so many ways she could answer that question, but none of them felt right. This was Michael, who she’d known forever, who stood up for her against his own sister when she thought she was out of line, who helped Mia forget about her tormentors with a well timed joke, who let her escape his sister wrath and hang out in his room or the garage with him, who took time out of his day, every day, to get her dream car running for her. Michael, who never treated her any differently after the whole princess thing came to light. Michael, who cared about her, even when she was just plain old Mia, with frizzy curls and glasses and clumsy beyond belief.

“Because you saw me when I was invisible.” She answered softly, truthfully.

“You’re the only one who hasn't treated me any differently because of the whole princess thing. You liked me before the hair and the makeup and the contacts, before I was, well, y’know, pretty.”

“You’ve always been pretty.” Michael whispered, dark eyes earnest.

Mia blushed, looking down at Michael’s t-shirt, playing absentmindedly with a loose thread.

“I know this whole princess thing is intimidating,” she continued as if he hadn’t spoken, “but it doesn't have to change anything. I’m still clumsy and awkward Mia. I’m still me. Except, now I have balls to attend and a country to rule.”

Michael smiled, “Josh looks better in a tux, maybe you should reconsider before it’s took late.”

Mia shook her head, giving him a soft smile, “I don’t know, I think my boyfriend might have an issue with that.”

“Boyfriend, huh?” Michael asked, raising a teasing eyebrow.

Mia’s cheeks went up in flames, “Is that okay?”

“Hmm, I don’t know,” Michael murmured, his dark eyes flickering over her face, settling on her lips, “will there be pizza at these balls?”

Mia smiled, “Of course, pizza’s a given.”

Michael grinned back, pulling her closer to him so she was cradled in his arms, “Then I guess you have yourself a date, princess.”

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And he sealed it with a kiss.

~~~~~

I hope you guys liked it and as always, if you have any suggestions for future stories, want to give me feedback or just come say hi, my inbox is always open! I promise to return soon with something new! Much love :)

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