#i wrote in senior year and i’m just now finishing it

[timothvy]

catlad montage for my fanfic (which i just finished wow!)

Nine Lives by Timothvy on ao3

Summary:

When confronted with the idea that there is someone or something specifically targeting the heroes of Gotham Red Robin turns to Catwoman for help. He takes on the title of Catlad and together they try to uncover the mystery eating Gotham alive from the inside all while the Batfamily realizes Red Robin is missing.

[kosagum]

i'll stop time for you — gojo satoru · fluff · 2.8k words

summary: with only a couple of months left before graduation, gojo wishes he could stop time, if only to be with you for just a little while longer.

“you know in an alternate universe, i would’ve walked out,” you scoff.

GOJO smiles at this and turns toward you. “but then you would have never gotten to know how cool i can be. and, i’d never get to know you. i’m happy you didn’t.”

it’s the middle of the night and sleep should be the only thing on your minds, but you both find yourselves discussing when the two of you first met.

as a student journalist, you interviewed gojo, a renowned student-athlete, your junior year for your college newspaper. now you both are well into your senior year, beginning to prepare for what comes next.

gojo’s apartment is a break from all the stressful preparation, a rendezvous point for when both of your schedules are packed. tonight you’re lying under the covers, facing each other. your bodies are intertwined, comfortably pressing against each other. the lights are off, but you can still make out his eyes, which are fighting sleep.

it didn’t help that the heat was cranked up high to oppose the snow falling just outside gojo’s window. the blanket you're under is cozy and soft. you’re freshly showered. gojo’s pajamas are fluffy and warm, coming directly out of the drier. you can still smell his floral-scented fabric softener.

the perfect conditions for falling asleep.

you take a moment to think about his words, hiding your smile with the blanket and looking at his nose to quell the butterflies arising within you.

gojo’s hand searches for yours under the blanket. once found, he pulls himself closer to you. now you’re nose to nose. his eyes, which were laced with sleep, are awakening. you can’t tell what he’s thinking, but he seems to be enjoying himself.

“you were so difficult, you know? i was just trying to have a good interview, but you didn’t even cut me some slack.”

gojo squeezes your hand and chuckles, “well i mean could you blame me? you weren’t giving me the reactions i wanted to see.”

“so you try to take over the interview?” you tease. “i was the interviewer.”

“i would never!” gojo insists, feigning shock, “i wanted to know more about you. you made an impression on me. and you’re definitely stretching the truth.”

“i’m not,” you laugh. “whenever i would ask you a question, you would answer me but then ask the same damn question back. don’t think i forgot how you would try to reword it, so i wouldn’t catch on either. i still don’t know how you thought that would work. you must really like the sound of your own voice.”

“it’s not that…while i do have a nice voice,” gojo begins, smiling after you lightly hit his arm and roll your eyes. “i just wanted to talk to you longer. it didn’t help that i didn’t know if we’d see each other again,” he pouts.

you pause at this, looking down at the blanket covering you two. your eyes make their way back to his, but you don’t say anything.

after the interview, you did cross paths again. more frequently than before. whenever you and gojo saw each other, he always made it a point to ask whether or not you finished the article. he’d try to justify himself by saying he wanted to see your hard work and his handsome face. you never failed to scoff at him. but that only seemed to spur him on further.

“why you staring at me?” he snorts. “falling in love?”

“i could ask the same of you,” you retort, pushing a piece of hair from his eyes.

once the article was published, you personally emailed him the link. to your surprise, he actually read it. he responded more quickly than you expected and praised you, saying he enjoyed your writing and appreciated that you wrote about him as a person, not just a student-athlete.

he then, not so smoothly, added his number to the end of the email followed by a winky face. despite being embarrassed for him, you still saved it.

gojo pauses when you fix his hair, flustered. he grins, taking your hand and placing small kisses all over it.

“well, i’m doing it because i think you’re beautiful. and i really like seeing you smile, even in the dark. so yeah, maybe i am.”

“don’t change the subject,” you blush.

“says the one who didn’t continue the conversation.”

“i was thinking!” you roll your eyes and glare at him. “i was so close to walking out and using whatever i already had from the beginning of the interview. it didn’t help that i couldn’t tell if you were trying to trip me up.”

gojo’s smile falters for a moment. “wait, did you really think i was trying to mess you up?”

you nod, looking at the pillow underneath you. sleep is starting to wash over you.

you shift around to find a comfortable position, still facing gojo and holding onto his hand. while settling on a position, gojo draws you close to his chest. he kisses your forehead before resting his head atop yours.

“i didn’t mean to make you feel bad about the interview. i was just trying to get to know the pretty girl in front of me.”

you never thought you would ever actually text him, but one day you went for it. you had just finished up in the campus newsroom and texted gojo to see if he was still on campus. he responded a lot quicker than you anticipated. before you knew it, he was standing outside, gasping for air.

“did you run here?” you questioned, fighting a smile.

“i don’t know what you’re talking about,” he grinned. “come on, let’s go. we’ve both been on campus for too long.”

gojo picking you up from the newsroom at the end of the day slowly became routine. you would take turns showing each other different parts of the city, of campus. slowly learning more about each other, and becoming closer.

“i know satoru, it’s fine. i wasn’t mad, just annoyed,” you kiss his chest, trying to assure him. “but you always annoy me, so what’s new.”

gojo lowers himself so you’re face-to-face again. he’s now fully awake. “don’t fall asleep on me now,” he sulks, poking your cheek.

you swat his hand away. “i’m awake, i’m awake. no need to be childish.”

a small gasp leaves gojo’s lips and he clutches his heart, earning a laugh from you. you sneak up to kiss his nose and try to pull away quickly, but gojo holds you in place and kisses you all over your face, grinning.

you pretend to grimace, but can’t hide the wide grin on your face.

“everything you’ve done is obviously impressive, but what i really wanted to know was who you were as a person. that’s why i wanted to do a feature piece on you. well, also because the sports editor wouldn’t shut up about it.”

“wait so the only reason why you interviewed me is because the sports editor wanted you to? and here i was thinking we had something special,” he laughs.

“it’s not the only reason, idiot. yeah, being a division one swimmer is cool and all. and you won the ncaa championship or something,” you mumble. “learning about you as a person was way more interesting, in my opinion. who would have known that satoru gojo is such a science nerd?”

“that’s not even true—”

“not true? i must have forgotten that someone told me you would sometimes sneak out of swimming practice to go to the physics club?” you giggle. “he said he was your friend, i think his name was geto?”

“i swear to god— of course that idiot said something,” he mutters.

you perk up after hearing this. sighing, gojo admits, “once this swimming stuff is over, i plan on focusing more of my time on physics. swimming is cool and all, but it just doesn’t excite me anymore. at first it was really fun, when geto did it with me. but then he quit to do something else, and it just became boring.”

“you just won a major championship and you find it boring?”

“i always win them, pretty,” he teases. you blush at the pet name and avert your eyes, groaning when gojo nudges your cheek. a defeated smile splays across your face. “but after a while, it gets stale,” he admits.

you and gojo lay there staring at each other. he did start winning more after geto left swimming. he and geto often battled it out for first place during collegiate meets. but once geto left, it became glaringly obvious how ahead gojo was from everyone else. he won the meet that qualified him for the ncaa championship and set a new personal record. he then went on to win the championship.

it seems that geto was the only one who could keep him on his toes.

you give his hand a squeeze. “so there’s more to you than swimming, that can never be a bad thing. not only do you have an ncaa championship under your belt, but i don’t doubt you’ll also win some physics titles too.

gojo’s about to protest when you interject, “if you never won all there was in swimming, then the feature piece would have never happened. i wish you didn’t have to experience so much boredom, but at least we met each other.”

gojo remembers how he would sometimes drop by the newsroom when he skipped swim practice instead of hanging around the physics club. you always pretended to be so annoyed, but could never hide the excitement in your smile. it was to the point where other people in the newsroom would remember him. some even talked to him too, much to your dismay.

one particular day, it was just you in the newsroom when he decided to come. he sat at the desk next to yours and asked you about the article you were writing before just watching you write in silence.

it was peaceful. after a while, gojo put his head on the desk and shifted his focus from your writing to you.

you were early into your relationship, but he already felt his heart ache at the limited amount of time you had with each other. he so desperately wanted to stop time. wishing to be with you as much as possible, feeling very thankful for these moments when he did get them.

he moved his chair closer to yours and put his head on your shoulder. you turned to look at him and tried to hide a smile. you lifted his head off your shoulder. gojo frowned at this, about to protest, but you put your head on his shoulder and then placed his head atop yours. you felt your face heating up and braced yourself for gojo’s teasing, but he simply shifted to kiss your head before settling back down.

without warning, you put your hand on top of his and weaved your fingers together. gojo’s eyes widened at this and his heart began to race. he pulled your entwined hands closer to him, and kissed yours.

stunned by your words, a blush forms across gojo’s face. “yeah, you’re right. i guess it all really was worth it,” he beams, placing a peck on your nose.

“if it helps, i know you’ll be amazing with whatever you choose to do with physics,” you assure. “to think, my boyfriend, a physics geek.”

“no way you just demoted me from a nerd to a geek.”

“it happens to the best of us,” you laugh. “and you’re my geek.”

you look up at him with affection in your eyes. gojo feels the urge to attack you with kisses, but restrains himself.

“enough about that stupid competition, i think you being offered a job at one of the best news publications is way cooler.”

“i guess we’ll have to agree to disagree,” you yawn. you snuggle deeper into gojo’s chest, feeling your consciousness slip.

he gives your hand another squeeze. “i said don’t fall asleep yet.”

“i can’t help it,” you yawn, pressing your forehead against his. “but you know, i am really happy i didn’t leave in the middle of the interview.”

your eyes start to droop, but you force them to remain open, “i found you cute when i first met you, so i felt like i had to work that much harder for the interview to go well. just for you to try to flip the script on me. i didn’t tell you at the time, but i kinda found it kinda funny.”

gojo smirks, “why would it make it harder? am i that irresistible?”

you roll your eyes. “you wish. but no, it’s because… it’s unethical to have a relationship with a source. we technically shouldn’t have happened, but…”

“you couldn’t resist me.”

you force down a laugh and shoot him a dirty look, “shut up! let’s just say, you maybe grew on me and i came to like you. a lot, even. especially when i got to see more of who you were. even though it was a risk, i really wanted to take it.”

you pause for a moment, “so i did. i guess you could say, i’m very happy with that choice too.” you grumble, avoiding his gaze.

gojo beams. you still chose to date him despite everything.

he cups your face with both hands, giving you as many kisses as possible. part of you wants to fight him off, but another is just as happy as he is. when he’s done, you give him a deeper kiss on his lips, feeling your stress and worries fading away.

you’ve both been running around trying to make any final decisions and plans for graduation while tending to your usual responsibilities, so you barely got to see each other. the thought of graduating always makes gojo tense. he rarely brought it up to you, but you knew. you felt the same way, but tried to keep it together in front of gojo.

one night, you showed up at gojo’s apartment unannounced. you threw yourself into his chest and just held him, and he immediately held you back. though no words were spoken, he understood. you stayed like that for a while until he moved you both to the couch.

it was also the first time gojo finally explained his worries about graduation and possibly losing you. though you reassured him countless times, he still vowed to stop time, just for you. you giggled at his words, but promised to do the same for him.

he looks at you slowly falling asleep. he can tell you’re doing your best to stay awake, but don’t have much fight left in you. giving you a peck on the lips, gojo whispers, “thank god you chose to write about me. i fall more and more in love with you by the second.”

delirious with sleep, you mumble something about him back. barely loud enough for gojo to hear.

“i’m going to take that as, ‘thank you, my prince, you’re so sweet’.”

you flick his forehead before nuzzling against his cheek, muttering, “i said, i might be in love with you too.” you giggle, finally succumbing to sleep.

gojo watches you for a bit, listening to your breathing. he starts to feel sleepy himself. he gently squeezes your hand once more. he feels you squeeze his back. he chuckles, wondering if you’re actually still awake or if it’s now become a reflex. he’s happy either way.

he looks at you with such yearning in his eyes, wishing he met you sooner in his life. maybe in another universe, you would be childhood friends. swimming might not have been so boring if you were there cheering him on, and he doesn’t doubt that geto would have loved you there too. he could have been the one to offer himself as the subject for a feature piece. he laughs to himself, thinking about your annoyance at that.

he would have loved to be with you from the start. he still worries about the couple of months you have left together before graduation, but he tries to push that away, thankful that he even met you at all.

he does his best to stay optimistic, knowing you’ll still be together after graduating. gojo will always be there for you, even if life has you in different parts of the world.

gojo smiles at this thought, feeling a blush spread across his face. squeezing your hand one final time, he snuggles even closer to you and slowly drifts off to sleep.

[gluion]

wish you were sober — seok matthew

seok matthew x reader, slight myung jaehyun x reader

wc — 6.9k genre & warnings — fluff, light angst, crack, friends to lovers, alcohol consumption, vomitting in one scene, kissing/making out, jealousy, zb1 friendgroup antics, HAOBIN AND GYUBRIK CANON SRY, boynextdoor and kiss of life cameo, reader has hair long enough to be tucked and held back playlist/inspired by — apt. by ros�� & bruno mars // sober II by lorde // wish you were sober by conan gray // urs by niki // lovers rock by tv girl notes — wrote this mainly bc my life changed the moment matthew read my sign in the jebewon con, finished it the day matthew was @ the prada event. and in both instances, i've gotten significantly more ill, so here's this very self-indulgent, self-insert fic (where aspects are derived from my own experiences) <3 if you enjoyed reading, please do reblog and leave feedback! request to be part of the taglist! masterlist

synopsis — as far as matthew knows, you still liked another man. yet, your friendship with him takes a sudden turn over a drunken confession... or three.

(or in other words, the three times you confess to matthew under the influence but he never believes you—until you tell him sober.)

the first time you confess to matthew happens on the night of hanbin’s graduation—no, not a confession of love but one of attraction.

if matthew has to be completely honest, he still doesn’t know what to make of your words. over the course of three years, he wouldn’t have suspected your interest in him. if anything, he’s under the impression you still like jaehyun. yet, everything shifts the moment he stumbles into the same bathroom as you.

“hanbin, have you found yourself a job?” gyuvin pops the long awaited question.

more than half of the group finds themselves in the kitchen. matthew knows that gunwook’s coming from soccer practice and yujin had to stay home for a doctor’s appointment the next day. as for you, he remembers seeing you with julie on the search for jaehyun and sungho.

the graduated fellow groans. “don’t remind me that i’m unemployed. this whole job search is going to kill me.” hao chuckles as hanbin rests his head on his shoulder.

gyuvin slings his arm around jiwoong’s shoulders. “oh, don’t worry! i’m sure this employed man can make something happen, right?” 

“me? you should be asking ricky!” all eyes land on the blond who sips away on a drink. “he’s the one with a family business. i’m barely making it in that goddamn nine to five that i’m still mixing shit for you college students.”

ricky elbows jiwoong’s side, causing the man to yelp. “you could be asking me for a job if you really hated the one you have now.”

“really? you could save me?” jiwoong almost gets on his knees until matthew holds him back.

“please don’t do that. not everyone knows you here.”

the man complies and puts his hands together. “ricky, please. i might just kill myself if i have to deal with another overtime. i mean, i can’t even remember the last time i properly hung out with you guys.”

“i don’t think anyone expects you to stick with us all the time. you have a job.” taerae’s point only brings him to a fit of laughter as jiwoong tickles him.

regardless of how loud taerae and jiwoong are, the rest of the group continues to discuss hanbin’s dilemma. “but yes, i could make something happen if you really want,” ricky offers.

“really? thank you!” hanbin hugs him. “it’s almost impossible to find a job. i don’t know why.”

“tell me about it. i can’t even get an internship. i’m already willing to settle for an unpaid one but no one seems to be accepting,” taerae complains as he leans against the wall. 

hao swishes around the alcohol in his cup. “that does make me wanna ask what the upcoming seniors are planning to do.” his eyes darted between taerae and matthew.

taerae grins. “the goal is to become a trophy wife.”

“of course it is.” gyuvin laughs before leaning against ricky. “i’m marked safe. i don’t know about you guys.”

jiwoong groans while taerae rolls his eyes at their public display of affection. “you don’t have to rub it in our faces.”

“yeah, whatever. what about you?” ricky looks at matthew. “are you still planning for medschool or is there another career crisis happening again?”

he shakes his head. “nah, i’m still pretty set on med school. next year is going to be hell for me.”

“ah, that means matthew is going to be the one providing for his partner! taerae, now’s your chance.” hanbin’s joke has everyone bursting into laughter.

taerae dramatically clears his throat, choking in between which only makes them wheeze. “matthew, can i be yours?”

matthew gets closer to his friend, his face only a few inches apart before saying, “not until you let me become yours.” at his double down, everyone starts to make gagging noises, including taerae who physically cringes.

“get a room!”

“damn, no kiss?” ricky’s joke in contrast to gyuvin’s complaint has jiwoong chuckling.

“yeah, you know what? fuck you, guys. i’m going to find someone at this damn party.” with that, taerae ventures off. jiwoong follows without another word.

gyuvin’s phone rings in his pocket. as he brings it out, he sees a message. “oh, gunwook’s already here! i’m gonna go grab him.” ricky trails behind his partner, leaving matthew with the other couple. 

hanbin looks around before asking, “hey, where is y/n?”

“last time i saw them, they were looking for myungjae and sungho.” matthew chugs down his drink before letting out a sigh.

“i wonder when they’ll finally grow a pair and ask him out, or just do something about it,” hao wonders out loud as he stares off into the crowd. “it’s almost painful to watch. i feel like i need to play cupid.”

“wait, why haven’t you been helping them out?”

hanbin’s question has matthew laughing in disbelief. “you think i haven’t? i’ve done almost everything to push them. i even told them all the signs that show he’s clearly interested, but y/n won’t budge. i’m surprised they’ve been sane enough to not say anything even while drunk.”

it almost seems like their conversation summoned jaehyun into the kitchen as he comes rushing to them. “oh, speak of the devil. we were just talking about you,” matthew says with a smile until he sees worry taking over jaehyun’s features.

“guys, i think y/n had too much to drink.”

matthew stands up straight. “where are they?”

“in the bathroom with julie.”

without another word, matthew makes his way to you while jaehyun follows. “what even happened?”

“y/n was fine, i swear. with how they were acting, we all thought they were just tipsy. but it was like watching a sudden switch from that to… genuinely almost passing out.”

it’s not that matthew doesn’t trust jaehyun. if anything, he would trust him any other day to watch over you, but tonight’s events only show that jaehyun still has much to learn about you. the guilt in his voice only shows how much he cares.

as soon as matthew spots sungho and natty outside of the bathroom, he rushes to them. “oh, thank god you’re here. julie is helping them freshen up right now,” sungho says. 

“we weren’t trying to get them blackout drunk, we swear. we really thought they were okay, but i don’t think they ate enough before drinking. me and julie were helping y/n as they were throwing up but they kept looking for you.”

matthew rubs his chin over natty’s explanation. “can i go in?”

“uh, let me check.” natty knocks on the door before swinging it open.

“matthew, we’re sorry. we really didn’t know,” jaehyun apologizes.

before matthew can say anything, julie exits the bathroom. “i think they puked out whatever they could. just make sure they stay close to the toilet.”

without another word, matthew makes his way to the doorway. he sees your hunched figure by the bathtub as you sit on the tiled-floor. in your drunken state, you don’t notice him as you quietly sing a melody.

matthew should’ve been filled with worry. yet, he thinks back to natty’s words, and the image of you looking for him plays in his mind—and it’s a smile that he can’t get rid of.

once he closes the door behind him, your eyes snap to him. “matthew! you’re here.” your slurred words bring him to a chuckle.

matthew remembers the last time you were this drunk; it’s funny to find you in the same situation after telling him multiple times that you wouldn’t drink that much ever again. he crouches to your side, taking in the sight of your disheveled state. “y/n, i thought we weren’t going to drink that much anymore.”

“i know,” you hiccup before your eyes shut, “i’m sorry.”

sure, you were always a mess whenever you drank this much, but you were never intolerable—never to matthew. (after all, he’d deal with you in your most intoxicated state over the others.)

his hand reaches out to tuck some strands behind your ear. at the presence of his warmth, your cheek snuggles against his palm. “you don’t have to be sorry. it’s okay.” you melt into his touch. 

without thinking, his thumb caresses your cheek, etching invisible shapes onto your skin. he watches you twitch over the action, and your eyes meet him once more. 

matthew’s ready to draw his hand back, help you stand up and escort you back to your place—

“you’re so pretty.”

his movements halt. matthew doesn’t know if he heard you right or if the alcohol is getting to him as well.

“huh?”

and the next thing you say stops him from breathing. “you’re so cute.”

it’s not unusual for you to compliment him, really, but something’s different about now. maybe it’s the alcohol or the distance between you two, but all matthew knows is that your words carried some weight different from other instances.

perhaps now is the worst time for matthew to be stuck in a daze. you’re drunk. he shouldn’t be making a fuss over the nonsense you spout, which is why he fails to catch the telltale signs of your impending nausea. (and you clearly wouldn’t have caught yourself in your intoxicated state.)

before you both know it, you throw up on yourself, and that finally snaps matthew out of a haze. he’s quick to grab the trashcan and bring it close to you. as you vomit, he holds your hair back. it keeps on going, and going, and going—at least matthew will take that as a clear sign that you’re done for the night.

on the next day, matthew asks if you remember what you said last night. when he’s met by your confusion, he knows better than to not think anymore of what you said then.

(and instead of sharing your slurred words, he tells you of the vomiting mishap in the bathroom. jesus fucking christ, i am not drinking ever again, you say in embarrassment.)

ever since that night, matthew has made it a habit to ask about your progress with jaehyun. it’s not that he’s running away from the events of that night. after all, hanbin’s right; matthew should do a better job in playing cupid for you and jaehyun. yet, all questions pertaining to your relationship with the boy were always met with a shrug and a refusal to dive into the details.

a few months pass. something romantic has yet to develop between you and jaehyun. at this point, matthew is feeling hopeless about the future you dream with that boy, but he isn’t the type to give up. he knows that there’s something between you two—all you need is a push.

“happy birthday, gyuvin!” everyone cheers as their cups clink against each other.

the birthday boy grins as he leans on ricky’s shoulder. “thanks, everyone. i’m glad you guys are here,” he mumbles. his cheeks have gone red and his words are starting to slur. considering how long the party has been going, matthew isn’t surprised to see gyuvin very much intoxicated.

for his birthday, he decided to invite his friends from his other social circles; basketball jocks, gaming nerds, and even student council folks take over his house as they talk and play over drinks. gyuvin thinks now would be the best time for all of his friends to meet. still, most of the group sticks together.

“you know, you should just hire me to bartend for your parties. everyone in this party seems to be chugging the drinks i mix for them,” jiwoong jokes as he bumps his shoulder against gyuvin.

“isn’t the next party going to be halloween? are we even planning to host one?” hanbin asks.

taerae tries to recall the previous arrangement. “didn’t we agree to spend halloween with yujin?”

“nah, we decided on christmas. yujin said he has plans for halloween, so we can host or just find another party to crash.” gunwook’s response brings the whole group to look at him. he raises his hands in defense. “don’t look at me! i’m not offering to host.”

“does myungjae not plan to host one?” hao’s question seems to be directed at matthew with how his eyes are on him.

jiwoong brings his hands together. “perfect! he might hire me.”

matthew rolls his shoulders back. ever since he tried playing cupid, he doesn’t know why everyone seems to go to him for anything related to you and jaehyun. first, it was when gunwook wanted to know about jaehyun’s schedule. next, it was gyuvin when he asked if jaehyun and his friends would be attending this party.

it’s not like matthew knew everything about myung jaehyun. 

(unfortunately, it doesn’t help that he only has jaehyun’s schedule because he had to find a way to make you spend time with him. what doesn’t help his case any more is that he only knew of jaehyun’s attendance because he wanted to make use of this party to push you to do something.)

“i wouldn’t know.” matthew takes a sip of his drink. “and, wouldn’t hanbin know? he’s closer to myungjae than i am.”

“we should just ask him. where is he, anyway?” hanbin looks around.

“probably with y/n, or something,” ricky jokes before swaying in his spot with gyuvin. “any update on that? what’s been going on with them.”

all matthew does is shrug in response.

“guys, hear me out…” gyuvin calls on the group’s attention. “truth or dare.”

a beat passes.

“let’s go find myungjae.”

“yah! it’s my birthday.” gyuvin pouts over hao’s reaction. “don’t you guys think it’ll be fun?”

jiwoong scoffs at gyuvin’s question. “fun? the last time we played, it resulted in someone losing their clothes and me almost losing my job from a tweet you guys made.”

“i thought you hated your job, anyway.” taerae’s comment results in a scolding from jiwoong. “what?! i’m just pointing it out.”

while some were against the idea, others were onboard with gyuvin’s idea. “i’m sure it’ll be fun. let’s get myungjae and the others to join in as well,” gunwook suggests.

then, it hits matthew that this is it—this is the opportunity that he needs to push you. under the guise of a simple and fun game of truth or dare, he could maximize whatever option you choose. “i’m in.”

everyone ends up agreeing with gyuvin’s game. from there on, all matthew needs to do is grab you and jaehyun and hope that his plan moves forward. (and get his other friends to join, sure.)

matthew is lucky that he’s able to spot julie in a sea of students. while she’s busy chatting with the seniors, he realizes that you and jaehyun aren’t with her. he continues to move through the crowd. the last thing he wants is to see you too drunk to function, especially when the universe presented him with the perfect opportunity for you and jaehyun.

yet, it comes to his surprise that he sees you in the corner, whispering into the ear of your crush with your hand against his chest. the grin on jaehyun’s face is enough for matthew.

maybe you didn’t need your friend’s help. just from the distance (or the lack of it), matthew thinks you might have everything under control. that means that matthew can sit back and allow you two to unfold this romance.

but there’s a sting in matthew’s chest. he’s sure it’s not a heart attack; it should come in a form of squeezing, and the pain should spread throughout his body. yet, the one he’s experiencing is merely an ache. maybe he should hold himself back from drinking any more.

“have you found y/n?” gunwook rests his hand on matthew’s shoulder. before matthew can respond, gunwook spots you and jaehyun. “myungjae! y/n!” at his call, you two snap your attention to them. matthew can already tell how intoxicated you are from how you spin your head to his direction. “come! we’re gonna play a game.” with that, gunwook takes his leave.

matthew’s suspicions are further proven with your inability to walk straight to him. “matthew! there you are,” you giggle as your arm links with his. your hiccup brings matthew to look at jaehyun.

“how much did they have this time?”

“less than the last time, but i’d still argue quite a lot.” 

while matthew and jaehyun try to find the group, you continue to latch onto matthew’s arm as you walk sluggishly. “do you not drink a lot?” matthew asks jaehyun.

the boy hums for a moment. “i do, but i think it’s better if i drink less when i’m around y/n. at least i’d be sober enough to take care of them.”

matthew has no reason to doubt jaehyun, especially with an answer like that. he knows that jaehyun would care for any of his friends; jaehyun’s always been the type to help out his friends with any task, but his choice to take that extra step tells matthew enough of his adoration for you.

“what are you guys talking about? are you talking about me?” you slur the question as you tug on matthew’s arm. “it better be good things.”

matthew can’t help but laugh.

as soon as matthew and jaehyun spot the rest of their friends gathering into a circle around a bottle, the three of you quickly find your own spots to settle into.

jaehyun takes a seat near sungho, leaving some space beside him. before matthew can go somewhere farther to sit, your grip on his arm holds him back. “hey, stay with me.” matthew’s eyes flicker between your drunken expression and jaehyun’s gaze fixed on him and you.

“you’re okay. you’ll be with myungjae.”

matthew’s confident that you would agree to sit beside jaehyun. after all, the boy took care of you for most of the night. yet, your grip never falters, and nothing could’ve prepared him for the last sentence you mumble, one only for him to hear.

“no. want you with me.” 

matthew stills. the music becomes muffled and the chatter surrounding him falls silent. instead, the beating of his heart fills his ears as heat rises to his cheeks—and he doesn’t know why. 

“hey! sit down!” gyuvin calls him out. with all eyes on you two, matthew doesn’t want to upset you any further. if he pushed to sit somewhere else, it would only cause a scene, and that’s the last thing he wants on his friend’s birthday. matthew finds himself sinking into a spot beside you.

the game proceeds accordingly, where most chug some more alcohol with every round that passes. secrets spill out of people’s mouths and laughter seems to fill the air. and for some reason, with all the times that’s passed, you stayed leaning against matthew.

at least you weren’t drinking along with the others.

after multiple interrogations and embarrassing dares, taerae spins the bottle. “please please please, don’t make it me again,” he prays as everyone watches the bottle go in circles.

“i’d laugh if you had to do another one,” gunwook says before taking another shot. “actually, i’m going to hope it lands on you!”

taerae tackles his friend to the ground over his comment, making him yell out complaints. yet, the universe works in taerae’s favor—and also matthew’s.

“oh my god, finally!” taerae cheers as he sees the bottle pointing at you.

you blink a couple of times. “oh, fuck me.” your head finds its spot behind your hands.

“i have been waiting for this one.” taerae rubs his hands together. “truth or dare?”

you have always been the type to choose truth. with the group’s history with dares, you weren’t the type to take that risk, which is why it comes as a surprise to everyone when you say, “fuck it, give me a dare.”

this is it. this is the opportunity that matthew needed. “i have a dare!” he beats everyone from spitting out any useless suggestion. as soon as all eyes are on him, he glances at jaehyun before saying, “i dare you to do seven minutes in heaven.”

your eyes go wide over matthew’s suggestion. “what the fuck?” you smack his arm. “no way in hell am i going to do that!”

“nu-uh! a dare is a dare,” ricky argues. “don’t try to get out of this.”

gyuvin speaks up, “if it helps, you don’t have to do anything with anyone. take this as your opportunity to bond with someone, get your heart-to-heart talk or something. but you can also make out with them, we don’t really care.” before he can take another shot, ricky stops him from doing so.

you groan at your friends’ insistence. “but with who?”

the stars are aligning for matthew. he’s about to chime in with the perfect name—

“what if we just spin the bottle again?” all hope shatters for matthew, and myung jaehyun is to blame. “that can determine who will be with y/n. it’s completely by chance.”

before matthew can interject, gyuvin claps at jaehyun’s suggestion. “you know what? you’re so fucking smart. let’s do that.” with how intoxicated the birthday boy is, no one seems to go against his idea, including you, and matthew fears what will unfold once that bottle lands on someone that isn’t jaehyun.

as soon as gyuvin reaches out to spin the bottle, matthew shuts his eyes in hopes that the universe would listen to him in the same way it did with taerae. he’s not even doing this for himself—it’s all for you. he wants you to win as much as you do with yourself. (he hopes that, at least. he needs you to believe that you have something with jaehyun as much as he does. if you didn’t, then this would go nowhere.)

“oh.”

matthew says one final prayer. he opens his eyes at the sound of gyuvin’s reaction, and what he doesn’t expect to see is the bottle pointing right at him. matthew’s convinced that the universe is going against him.

“well, lead the way, birthday boy,” jiwoong says.

matthew glances at you, expecting to see disappointment, but he only sees an expression he’s never seen before—and one he can’t decipher. 

it doesn’t take a while until you and matthew are shoved into gyuvin’s walk-in closet. gunwook says they’ll keep the game going, but matthew attempts one last time to get out of this dare, only for the door to be shut right in front of his face.

as the shuffling of footsteps grow distant, matthew finally accepts defeat. he looks back to see you sitting on the floor with eyes shut. maybe you need these minutes to sober up. after all, who is the best person to take care of you if not him? 

matthew finds himself on the floor with you. seven minutes could easily pass with you two; not a single word needs to be said. but tonight, time seems to stretch into an eternity. matthew hates it.

he takes in the sight of you; your shirt’s disheveled and your nose scrunches from the heat of the room and alcohol. still, most things remain the same. your arms cross with every moment your eyes long for rest and your steady heart sounds throughout the room from every exhale.

since when did matthew notice all the small things about you? it’s not like you two were friends longer than he is with hanbin. he still finds himself forgetting trivial things about his friends—with you, it comes easy.

your eyes peel open, and for the first time, matthew’s nervous around you.

“you feeling better?”

you nod before sitting up straight. “yeah, i think the alcohol is leaving my system.”

“that’s good.”

seconds go by.

“so,” matthew clears his throat, “how are you and myungjae?”

a laugh escapes you, not like the ones whenever he cracks a joke but something he’s never heard before. “we’re okay.”

matthew waits a couple of moments until he realizes you weren’t going to expound. “oh, so now, i don’t get to hear you yap about your crush?” his comment manages to earn a laugh he’s familiar with.

but it’s turned into a reality. he can’t remember the last time you actually talked to him about myung jaehyun. if anything, it’s almost like you don’t want to talk about the boy to him.

matthew’s never been the type to force you to share anything, really, but he realizes it’s been a while since you mentioned the boy’s name. it’s impossible for him to ignore that. and tonight, he can blame his curiosity on the alcohol.

“are you hiding something?” 

“it’s not that.”

matthew hums. “then, what is it? 

silence falls on you two.

he takes the lack of your response as a sign. to not push any further. to not be curious. to respect your privacy.

to sit back and watch it unfold.

to forget all that you’ve said on that drunken night.

“myungjae and i are just friends.” matthew’s eyes snap up to meet yours. “we’ve always been just friends.”

“but that can change. i mean, i could help you! i’ve seen how much he cares for you, i’m convinced he likes you—”

“matthew,” you cut him off, “like i said, we’re just friends.”

he frowns. “i’m confused. just because you’re friends now doesn’t mean you can’t be something more.”

your breath hitches, and his confusion deepens.

“you really think that?”

it’s at this moment that matthew spots something different about you tonight, one he’s never been on the receiving end of to experience—your glossy eyes filled with strong, bittersweet yearning.

and he holds his breath before saying, “yes.”

the bass of the music fades away. the heat of the alcohol means nothing. matthew could care less about who he came with to this party.

right now, it’s just you two. 

“i don’t like myungjae.” your reveal causes matthew to frown. “i haven’t liked him for a while.”

“oh.”

you nod. “yeah.”

matthew has a million questions running through his head. what caused the change or heart? how long ago did you know that? is there something wrong with jaehyun and he never saw? 

“i—”

“when—”

he shakes his head. “sorry, you go first.”

“no, it’s okay. what were you going to say?”

“it’s just… i wanted to know when you realized that.”

a chuckle leaves you. “even before hanbin’s graduation party.”

“you could’ve told me! if i had known, i wouldn’t have kept pushing you to do something with myungjae.” matthew hides his mouth in embarrassment. 

you shake your head. “it’s okay. i didn’t tell you because…”

matthew notices your fingers fiddling with each other, an unconscious habit of yours whenever you’re anxious, and his confusion grows.

he doesn’t want you to think he can’t be trusted with your secrets, your stories, everything about you. after all, he wants to be your friend—your person—and how can he do that if you felt an ounce of shame to tell him that? he needed to let you know that—

“i like you.”

time stills for a moment.

for once, matthew doesn’t know what to say. 

“time’s up!” the door swings open, revealing gunwook and taerae whose grins are lopsided. “did y’all enjoy the heart-to-heart?” gunwook’s question is an innocent, light-hearted one, but the silence hanging between you two is nothing of the sort.

before matthew knows it, you let out a giggle. “of course!” in your attempt to stand up, you almost lose your footing, causing taerae to reach out to you. “sorry. i don’t know why but i feel a lot drunker than before.”

your slurred words only makes taerae shake his head. “oh, my silly lil alcoholic. let’s keep it going!”

the three of you exit in high spirits. yet, matthew finds himself stuck in his spot.

stuck in his memories.

stuck in the last conversation.

stuck in your words.

stuck in denial.

“yah, matthew! hurry up! we’re still playing,” gyuvin shouts from outside of the room.

because you’re drunk. you probably didn’t mean anything you said, like how you didn’t mean what you said at the last party. 

for the rest of the night, you continue to enjoy gyuvin’s birthday.

matthew attempts to do the same.

it’s been two months since that conversation. on the morning after the party, you admit to the group that you lost recollection of the events that transpired on gyuvin’s birthday. with how much the birthday boy drank, he found himself in the same boat as you. taerae says that it’s only best that you don’t remember anything from that night, mainly to save his pride.

but matthew remembers it all. he remembers how you looked at him that night, how your breath hitched, how long the silence was all before you lied.

and he knows you lied.

all it took was one sight of you on a date with jaehyun for him to realize that.

matthew couldn’t believe he showed up to the halloween party, not because he wasn’t the type to deny an invite, but because it’s being hosted by jaehyun.

he has nothing against him, really, but the conversation in the closet shifted everything; his dynamic with the boy, his thoughts surrounding your relationship with jaehyun, his feelings towards you. matthew prefers to keep his distance out of respect for you two.

that doesn’t mean he won’t talk about it with others.

“i really don’t think they’re together.”

“hanbin, did you completely forget what i said?” matthew shakes his head. “they were on a date.”

he finds himself in the kitchen dressed as saiki k with an almost-finished bottle of soju in his hand. while the rest of his friends were off somewhere, hanbin and hao, who were dressed in stitch and angel onesies, stayed with him.

hao takes a sip of his drink. “how’d you know it was a date? they could’ve been hanging out for all you know.”

“well…”

“see! you can’t even defend your point.”

matthew groans. “that doesn’t change anything. i’m sure of it. i mean, they came in a couples costume!”

“they’re matching with sungho, you airhead,” hao points out.

hanbin laughs before adding, “as the incredibles, too!”

their doubtful reactions causes matthew to roll his eyes. he chugs the remaining contents of his bottle before grabbing himself another. “i thought i could trust you two.”

“and you can!” hanbin tries to snatch the bottle but fails. “dammit. just be responsible, okay? it’s already hard enough dealing with jiwoong and taerae when they’re drunk.”

hao sighs. “and you know, jiwoong’s drinking heavy tonight because he got laid off. hoping ricky can help him out.” matthew twists the cap open and drinks straight from the bottle once more. “hey, i’m still saying you should trust what we’re saying. whatever y/n shared in that closet might not be a lie.”

despite their attempts to convince matthew, he knows the truth. there’s no point in trying to prove him otherwise. so for now, he’ll drink the night away.

“i’ll see you guys later, or something.”

“matthew—”

he doesn’t spare a second to hear their protests. as much as he loves his friends, he needs some space to wallow in silence. all he longs for is a quiet space away from everyone with enough alcohol to forget everything.

“matthew!”

this is the last voice he wanted to hear, especially at his state. he sees jaehyun and sungho together dressed in black and red.

“oh my god, you’re matching with riwoo! you’re saiki k, right?” sungho asks.

matthew forces out a smile before nodding. “yeah. incredibles?” he points at the logo on their chests.

“yep! you should take a pic with riwoo!” jaehyun suggests

matthew would’ve agreed any other day, but he couldn’t talk to him. he didn’t want to ruin his relationship with the boy just because of his emotions. “myungjae, i would love to, but i have to go.”

“are you okay?”

when concern paints jaehyun’s features, matthew is reminded once more that there is nothing to hate about him. he needs to get over this whole thing. if you’re happy with jaehyun, he should learn how to be happy for you, too.

a sigh leaves matthew. “yes, sorry. i just need space, if that’s okay.”

“of course. i hope you’re okay. do you want me to bring you to a spot where it’s quiet?”

matthew shakes his head before reassuring the host, “it’s okay, i’ll figure it out on my own.” and with one final nod from jaehyun, matthew walks off.

he passes through the crowd, exchanging brief greetings with familiar faces, until he reaches a hall filled with doors. most rooms were already occupied, and the last thing matthew wants is to know what they’re doing. all he cares about is finding an unoccupied room where he can drink the night, the confusion, the pain, away.

once he reaches the final door, he quietly begs the universe to give him what he needs. as he swings the door open, he notices that the lights are off, and that’s enough for him to believe it’s unoccupied. without sparing a second thought, he shuts the door behind him before letting out a sigh.

it takes him a few seconds for his vision to adjust. with the moonlight cascading over the walls, he’s able to take in his surroundings. as soon as he spots a shelf filled with poetry books, he realizes he’s in jaehyun’s room. matthew couldn’t believe what the universe is making him undergo. he found himself in the bedroom of someone he desperately needed to get away from, but he’ll make do with the last unoccupied space—or that’s what he thought.

“matthew?”

“holy shit!” he jumps along with his heart. as he clenches his chest, his eyes dart to the source of the voice—only to see his friend, his supposed something. your chin rests on jaehyun’s mattress as you stare at him; the same, glossy eyes he witnessed in the closet. matthew clears his throat before standing up straight. “sorry, i thought i was alone.”

you shoot him a tight-lipped smile. “no, sorry i didn’t say anything as soon as you came in.”

a beat passes.

“why… uhm, why are you sitting in the dark?” his chest throbs as he asks the question.

what if you were there to meet with jaehyun later in the night? or what if you had already met with him? maybe he doesn’t want to know the reason after all.

“needed to be somewhere quiet,” you answer. he watches you take a sip from a big bottle of vodka. “somewhere away from the party.”

if you need space, matthew is going to give you that. after all, you were in this room before he arrived. “okay, i’ll go leave,” he says as he turns his back on you.

“no, it’s ok—”

“it’s okay. you were here first, so—”

“matthew.” 

how your voice wavers is enough to stop him. from leaving the room. from wallowing in pain.

from abandoning you. 

he looks back, only to be greeted by the sight of you in tears. the moonlight shines against your figure, making you glow in the dark room, and he feels all resolve crumble.

matthew rushes to you. as he takes a seat beside you, he sets the bottle on the floor before his hands reach out to cup your face. “what’s wrong?” he asks as his thumbs wipe the tears.

you don’t spare him an answer; all you do is stare right back at him as the tears stream down your face.

matthew think’s he fucked up. was he busy with his issues to notice yours? did you need him? (as much as he needs you?)

yet, as soon as your hand reaches up to hold his, he realizes that this is all wrong; the distance, the physical touch, everything about this doesn’t respect what you have with jaehyun.

“i’m sorry.” he rips his hands away. “i shouldn’t have done that.”

his apology brings another flood of tears from you. “i thought we were friends.”

“we are friends.”

“then, if we’re friends, why couldn’t you give me an answer back then?”

matthew’s heart stills. “w–what?”

“i remember everything.”

the axis of his world tilts. 

“from the bathroom to the closet,” you sniffle, “i remember what i said, and i meant everything.”

all he knew then meant nothing to the present.

matthew can’t tell if the alcohol was affecting his senses. maybe he’s hallucinating, or his intoxicated mind is planting delusions that he wishes were part of his reality.

but he blinks hard, and he still sees you.

“please say something.”

matthew takes one breath. “i just… i don’t understand. i mean, i’ve been going like, 5 months, thinking those were meaningless words. even in the closet, you said you were too drunk. and you always claimed you had no memory the next day. i even thought you were on a date with jaehyun the other day.” as you scrunch your eyebrows at his admission, he takes it as a sign to explain. “i don’t know. i saw you two alone a few weeks ago, and i just assumed so.”

“we were just hanging out. there’s nothing going on between us.”

he shakes his head. “well, how am i supposed to know that? when i’ve been going through these months thinking all you said was bullshit until now?”

when guilt flashes in your features, he takes a moment to let his words sink in.

he watches you fiddle with your fingers before saying, “i just want to know why you did all that.”

“is it enough to say that i was scared? i mean, i used the alcohol as liquid courage. but in both times, i couldn’t tell if you felt the same, so, i panicked and said i don’t remember anything.”

one thing that matthew knows about you is that you were afraid to take risks—no, not in decision making but in relationships. he knew that the first time you held yourself back from introducing yourself to jaehyun, and he remembers when you finally approached the boy with at least 5 shots into the night.

“can you say something? anything?” you ask.

and all times, he understood your hesitancy. every time you second guess yourself, he’s the only person who knows when to act as your safe space or a pushing force.

“tell me again. tell me what you told me in the closet, i need to hear it from you.” but when your mouth parts open, ready to repeat the three-word phrase, he cuts you off. “when we’re sober.”

this time, he wants to know if he’s a risk worth taking—without the alcohol.

“tell me when morning comes, then you’ll know.” he sees confusion flicker in your eyes. “because i can’t risk anything when we’ve drunk our hearts out tonight.”

if there’s another thing matthew knows about you, it’s that you hate unfinished conversations. yet, a nod from you is enough for him to know why it would have to wait until tomorrow.

from there, matthew stands up before taking his leave.

all he can hope is that you won’t forget the next day.

when morning comes, matthew can hear a knocking on his door. he makes his way to the doorway, rubbing the exhaustion off his eyes, before swinging it open.

“i like you.”

his eyes snap open to see you, whose eyes aren’t like the other nights but with something he’s familiar with—hope.

“i like you,” you repeat, “and i’m telling it to you now, without the alcohol.”

this time, matthew doesn’t have to doubt your words. he doesn’t have to shut down his friends’ attempts to comfort him. he doesn’t have to deny what he feels towards you.

without saying anything, his hands dart towards your waist before pulling you close to him. shock casts onto your features. as one thumb finds its way under your shirt, etching constellations that you two will only know of, his other hand reaches to tuck your hair.

his lips meet yours. as his hand travels down to caress your face, your arms slowly find their place around his neck. somehow, everything feels right, almost like you two had done this before. yet, the taste of your lips is one he’s never had. as your nose brushes against his, he can’t help but breathe you in like you’re the last thing keeping him alive.

as you attempt to pull back, he tries to chase your lips. “matthew,” you call out his name before he draws you back in for another intoxicating kiss, one where the buzz of alcohol could never compare to.

“don’t,” he mumbles in between, “let me have this.” he pulls you into his dorm with ease and shuts the door behind you. matthew pushes you against the door with his lips still on yours, hands exploring your figure.

from there, you don’t protest.

maybe he’s wanted you much longer than you did. maybe he’s wanted you ever since you revealed your crush on jaehyun and he never allowed himself to dwell on his own feelings. maybe he’s wanted you since the first time he’s ever set eyes on you. 

but one thing he knows is that he wants you—much more than you do with him.

(and he’d never allow you to think he wants you any less.)

networks taglist: @kflixnet @k-labels @blankjournal @zumblrnet @kstrucknet

zb1 permanent tag list: @deinsleeps

story taglist: @seokkiez @loserlvrss @itaerae

@blandtako @gong-fourz @rentenwins @pandagirl753

[scoops-aboy86]

By The Heart (Secret Admirer pt 2)

Steddie Week 2024, July 2: Hands / touch starved / Invisible Touch by Genesis

wc: 2136 / rated: T / set between seasons 2 and 3 / also on ao3

After the world fell apart a second time in November of ‘84, Steve had finished out the rest of his senior year in a daze. Partly because Billy Hargrove had broken a fucking plate over his head, giving him a small scar by his hairline that the doctor said would fade and recurring headaches that the doctor said might stick around anywhere from a few months to forever. 

It’s been more than a few months and the headaches are only slightly less frequent and a tiny bit less severe. 

He graduated, barely. His dad keeps dropping pointed comments about how his parents let him stay in their house rent-free after high school, how he’d saved up while attending a nearby college by not having to worry about the cost of a dorm or basic meals, and that it is his gratitude towards them that has moved him to offer the same to Steve. Usually said comments come after Steve tries to sidestep some sort of menial task, and it always feels like a threat.Steve just grits his teeth and takes it—refills his dad’s drink when the bottle is already literally right by the man’s hand, washes the family car after dinner when both his parents know that Steve has a shift at Scoops first thing in the morning, whatever. He can’t afford to get kicked out right now. 

His job at Scoops Ahoy is shit, all bright fluorescent lights and kids screaming and everything getting sticky for a measly minimum wage, but that probably reflects the quality of the job application he’d submitted. 

He has no friends, no prospects, no one in his corner except a bunch of incoming freshmen and the only one who really seems to want him around is off at some sort of smart people camp that he’d never even heard of… Go figure. 

But he has Secret Admirer. 

Okay, what Steve has is a pen pal who has a PO box and prefers to remain anonymous, possibly because Steve is an embarrassing person to have a crush on these days. And it’s really stupid that he thinks of them as first name Secret, last name Admirer, but it’s not like he hasn’t tried to come up with better names! Unfortunately, there are so many things Secret Admirer has called him (sweetheart, darling, dearest, honey, baby) that he can’t really think of anything original with those constantly rotating in his head… He can’t use them, though. It’d be weird. 

The first letter had been shoved into his locker in the last few weeks of school, looking like someone either wrote it with their non-dominant hand or had also suffered a blow to the head recently, and he hadn’t known what to make of it at first. In fact, he’d considered the possibility that Tommy or Billy were playing some sort of prank on him… but he didn’t think either of them could write “To Steve, the heart of my heart” without bursting into homophobic flames, and if it was Carol she would’ve done her girliest handwriting with hearts dotting the eyes. And his Secret Admirer had mentioned things no one else in his life seemed to care about. 

Like, 

I hope you’re feeling better. Sometimes I notice you squinting or grimacing in the classes we have in common… Are you still getting headaches? Do you get enough rest? You probably already know this, but mental and physical rest are super important for getting your handsome self all recovered, big boy. 

And,

I had a concussion once, not a bad one but it really left an impression. Felt like I was trying to think through a head full of soup for weeks. It sucks that teachers didn’t seem to cut you much slack because, just saying, I noticed they used to do that a lot more when you were still on the basketball and swim teams. Jock privilege placed above consideration of an actual, serious injury? I’m sorry, but that’s the rankest compound of villainous smell that ever offended nostril, sweetheart, and you deserve better. 

So, yeah. Clearly his Secret Admirer is a nerd who doesn’t necessarily have the best opinion of jocks… but still took the time to notice all those things and write kindly about them. It felt nice, knowing that at least one person out there noticed, maybe even cared. 

And when that letter turned out not to be a one-off, a few more letters in his locker and then one in his mailbox, postmarked and everything, after graduation? Steve was hooked, enough to start writing self-consciously back. 

Which has brought him to the point of wanting so badly to meet this person that he’s stooped to begging, and it’s not even getting him anywhere. 

It’s occurred to him that it could be a guy, of course it has. Steve might not be the sharpest knife in the drawer, but he knows it happens. He’d had a friend in middle school, Todd Fischer, nice guy, totally normal kid—got caught kissing some boy in the next grade up behind the gym and turned out to be the worst sprinter of the two. The Fischers had moved out of Hawkins a few weeks later and Steve hadn’t heard anything from or about Todd since. They’d been halfway through reading Romeo & Juliet in English at the time, and Steve remembers thinking when they got to the end of the play that at least things hadn’t gone that badly for Todd and whoever the other kid was. He’s old enough now to know that it could have; between Todd being such a nice kid, Barb dying in his own backyard, and the threat of government agents coming out of the woodwork if he ever breathes a word about certain secrets, the thought leaves a bad taste in Steve’s mouth. 

Anyway, if it is a guy, that would explain why Secret Admirer keeps dancing around his pleas to meet. And the initially disguised handwriting—which had been dropped by the second mailed letter, along with a brief, sheepish apology. 

But it could also be a girl who’s really shy or something. Steve doesn’t want to assume and then look like a total idiot further down the road. Whoever it is, all Steve knows is that he doesn’t want to lose them. He has to play this smart, play it cool… because he knows himself, and already knows that they have him by the heart based on words alone. 

The latest letter is in his hands, crinkled a little at the edges, and Steve can’t help himself from rereading the fifth paragraph yet again. 

… those indecently tiny shorts. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve thought about running my fingers up the inside of those thighs. Or my mouth. Whichever you think you’d like best, baby, I’m not picky. And while I do like ice cream, particularly strawberry with rainbow sprinkles in a cone, I can think of something else I’d love to wrap my hand around and run my tongue over before any drips can escape. You just think about that, hmm? Maybe share some of those thoughts in your reply, if I haven’t scared you off…

He’s not scared off. Doesn’t need to know exactly who put pen to paper to imagine hands and lips running up his legs, either, an invisible touch that sends shivers along his spine. 

Okay, maybe it’s been a while. Between striking out from behind the Scoops counter and not really trying all that hard anyway, the only action Steve’s seen is from his own hand… and this letter. He has thoughts, alright, but has a much better idea of how to translate them into action than words. And this is his problem with the whole pen pal only thing, his natural charm (if he has any left) is absolutely useless in this medium. 

The other problem is that he really, really wants to jerk off about this, except he’s got almost no details to fuel the fantasy. He knows that Secret Admirer had a concussion once, but not what color or length or texture or style their hair is; knows they’re on the fringes of popularity and not really into sports, but nothing about their height or build or how they might move against him. Hell, he doesn’t even know if they’re a girl or a guy, isn’t sure if he should try to imagine boobies and painted nails or stubbled cheeks and big hands. 

Secret Admirer has mentioned being a smoker though, of both tobacco and grass, and Steve is not exactly proud of how strongly this makes him want a cigarette just because it’s all he has to go on. He has work in under an hour and Robin hates the smell of cigarettes, will be extra vicious for their entire shift if he comes in reeking of smoke. 

He’ll have to figure out something else…

Dear Secret Admirer, Thanks for writing again, I was really glad to get your letter. I don’t sleep with them under my pillow because sometimes my pillow ends up on the floor and I don’t want to drool all over them. I keep them in a box in the back of my closet, because sometimes my parents have the cleaning lady do my bedroom without telling me and I don’t want her going through my stuff or putting it in weird places that I can never find again.  Sorry for laughing at you You must not have seen me last week when I threw a banana peel at my coworker for It’s not being humble if I don’t deserve Yeah, fuck high school.  Sorry for not rewriting this, I’m running out of paper and my dad’ll kill me if I break into his office to get more I definitely thought about what you said in your last letter. I thought about it a lot. It’s hard to figure out how to explain what though, because I wanted to picture you like you were probably picturing me when you were writing it. You obviously know what I look like, but I don’t know who you are so I had to get creative. (Which isn’t my strong suit. So if this is stupid maybe we could just never mention it again?) Since I don’t know what you look like and it’d be weird to try and picture you anyway, and then what if I’m not even close and that makes it seem like I don’t like you for who you are? I’m not sure if that makes sense. But anyway, since I don’t know what you look like I pictured you dressed like a ninja.  Hear me out, okay? You’re such a mystery. Ninjas are mysterious, and dressed all black to blend in with the shadows. You can’t see their hair or face and they wear gloves because you can tell a lot about a person by their hands. I guess what I’m saying is I imagined you sneaking into my room at night when the lights are off. Totally silent but with this powerful presence, you know? I think if I were in the same room as you it’d feel like that moment right before the whistle goes off at a swim meet, because that’s just like, holy shit it’s about to happen and your muscles are all tense but ready but you’re waiting, coiled like a snake. So I’m coiled like a snake and you’re still a ninja and I’m not very good at this. I’ve done it over the phone a few times but that’s different. I don’t know where I’m going with this just sitting writing this alone in my room with Genesis playing in the background so I’m going to stop. Just trust me, it was hot. If you ever want to exchange numbers I’d be happy to tell you all about it sometime.  It feels weird to end like that, so I’ll also tell you that I tried reading that Hobbit book you suggested and you were right, it’s a lot easier than the Rings book that the kids I babysit tried to bully me into reading. Bibo is freaking out about all these dwarves in his house and I can relate, it sounds like when those kids all show up and try to rope me into driving them around town. At least they haven’t tried to make me steal anything or try to take on a damn dragon yet. Hopefully this book won’t give them any ideas.  — Steve PS If that was so dumb you changed your mind about still writing to me, please let me down easy. Seriously it would be no hard feelings. At least I still have a great ass and great hair, so I’ve got that going for me.

Tag list (open): @hotluncheddie @lawrencebshoggoth @sofadofax @tangerinesteve @steviewashere

@cryingglightningg @theresebelivett @sleepy-steve @rozzieroos @lunaraindrop

@just-my-latest-hyperfixation @wheneverfeasible @swimmingbirdrunningrock @yesdangerpls @matchingbatbites

@ihavekidneys @p0lybl4nkk @grtwdsmwhr @cheesedoctor @thetinymm

@practicallybegging @fuzzyduxk @greatwerewolfbeliever

[rowdyluv]

Run to You - lh43 - timeless

summary: in which y/n’s first boyfriend is not a big fan of Luke and does one of the unspeakable acts to y/n. y/n needs luke.

warnings: TW! TW!: quick mentioning of significant other (almost) hitting other significant other, a lot of dialogue (I mean A LOT), soft luke, cursing, wrote this while half asleep and while at work sorry if it’s not my normal writing :(

word count: 1.7k

note: you are responsible for your own consumption of content on the internet. anything you interact with on my page is at your own discretion. this is piece of fiction. please do not take anything in this to be an accurate representation of anyone who is a real person to be literal. :)

time in life: senior year of high school

Rosey's heart raced as she walked down the sidewalk, her sneakers scraping against the concrete. Her thoughts were all jumbled up. She couldn’t understand what wrong and when it wrong. She was having the hardest time wrapping her mind around the fact Jason had just broke up with her. He was her first true boyfriend, and she thought he loved her. He said he loved her. Jason had given her a choice, him or Luke. She didn’t want to choose and she wouldn’t choose.

He lost his temper with her, his voice raised and eventually so did his hand.

Rosey dodged out of his reach just in time, if she hadn’t, his open hand would’ve connected across her cheek. Terrified of the man standing in front of her, she managed to blurt out a few words to him and charged right out his front door. Now she was walking toward the Hughes's house, struggling to keep herself composed.

Luke. She needed him now more than ever.

Jason lives two neighborhoods over from where her and Luke’s neighborhood is. It’s a quick drive from one place to the other, that is when you drive. Problem for Rosey is she was dropped at his place. Leaving her in a predicament of needing a ride home or to do exactly what she was.

Rosey didn't dare stop her trek, too paranoid Jason might be following her. She was approaching the Hughes’s house when she was brave enough to look behind her. Nothing. She slowed down enough to catch her breath. When she got close enough, she caught sight of Luke's figure through their living room window. Just the sight of him helped her relaxed. Jim and Ellen were out for the day with Quinn and Jack for one of their hockey games and she knew he'd be alone.

Rosey flung open the front door and raced into the house, slamming the door behind her. "Moosey!" she gasped, her voice echoing through the empty entry way. "Luke, I’m sorry for just barging in but I" Rosey couldn’t finish her sentence before her cries broke out as she entered the living room.

When she laid eyes on him and she knew she was safe in his presence, she couldn’t choke her emotions back any longer. Luke practically lunged off the couch, collecting her into his arms.

"Hey, sweet girl, what's wrong?" he asked, taking one of his hands to gently smooth across her hair. He paused halfway as she tensed then quickly relaxed.

"He..he almost smacked me," she sobbed, her voice breaking when she choked on her cries. "Jason, he just..” She paused, having to take a moment to catch her breath. “He got really upset with me when I told him I wouldn't stop being friends with you."

His eyes widened in disbelief. "He did what?" Luke’s question was rhetorical, he heard what she said to him, but he wanted to believe he didn’t though. He did his best to keep his tone even, he didn’t want to make anything worse.

"He was going to hit me, Moose.” She repeated, her face buried in Luke's hoodie. "He said I had to choose, him or you."

Luke's jaw tightened, the veins in his neck becoming more prominent. "That's such bullshit, Ro. Listen to me. You don’t have to choose.”

She didn’t say anything back to him, only squeezed his torso a little tighter and moved her head to where her forehead pressed against his chest so she was now staring at their feet.

Luke moved the two of them to sit down on the couch. He wanted to go over to Jason’s and take care of him, but his first priority was Rosey.

Rosey scooted closer to Luke leaning over onto his shoulder. In the most natural movement Luke moved her to where she was in his lap and he was cradling her close to him. “Listen, I'm here for you, no matter what. Always. The only person allowed to dictate who you are and aren’t friends with is you Rosey.”

"But he was my first boyfriend, and it isn’t fair.” Her body slouched in his arms, officially showing signs of being defeated.

Luke’s ears perked at the word was.

“What a way to ruin my outlook on relationships right?” If the way she entered the house wasn’t enough to shatter his heart the humorous laugh that just came out of her did for sure.

Luke started to rub her mid-thigh soothingly. “Ro, don’t let him ruin your view on relationships. Most people go through a shitty one, do you remember Mia? She basically killed me last summer, with how she chose to end things, but I got through it because I had you.”

Rosey scoffed at him, for the first time since the two had moved to the couch she turned her head enough to look at him. “Yeah, but you’re you and well. I’m me. You could have literally anybody you wanted if you tried.”

“Except you’re wrong, I can’t have the one girl I truly want.” His mind was fighting his heart. He wanted to risk it all and spill his heart to her right then, but what happens when she doesn’t feel the same way.

Rosey sniffled and wiped her nose on her sleeve. "What, are you kidding me?" she asked, her voice still shaky and Luke shook his head. “Don’t worry about that right now, we’re focusing on you.” He pulled her back towards his body, his arms strong and steady around her. "I'm sorry you had to go through that, sweet girl.. I wish I could make it better." She buried her face in the side of neck. The feeling of her warm breath on his neck making it hard for him to steady his heartbeat.

“Do you need anything?” Luke asks her wanting to make sure he makes her as comfortable as possible.

She attempted to shake her head from where it laid on his shoulder. “I already have what I needed" Her voice trailed off as she tried to figure out how to say her next few words. “I came straight here because I needed you.”

“Needed me?” He asked incredulously.

“Yes. I know that you’re always going to be here for me whenever I need you and you make me feel safe.. Always.” Her words were soft spoken but said with such conviction he wasn’t sure what he was to do or say.

Luke’s heart rate had to be at an unnatural level. He had just been debating on whether or not he should go ahead and tell her why he couldn’t get the girl. And now the girl was telling him, he was ‘what’ she needed.

Was our relationship really just a friendship to her too? Or did she ever think of me as something more. Did Jason see whatever Jack and Quinn seemed to think they see all the time?

While Luke was reeling from everything that was going on in his mind, he hadn’t realized he had dropped out of the embrace that he had been holding her in. Rosey had removed herself from his and sunk into her self, playing with her fingernails worried that she’d said something.

“Luke?” She finally called out his name after a few minutes.

He cleared his throat, trying to pull himself to the present. “Yes, sweet girl?”

“You spaced out, look a bit terrified, and then you slipped away.. Did I say something wrong?

Luke remained silent, shifting his position on the couch.

“Oh.” Rosey’s picking, soon turned to hair twisting signifying the increase in anxiety. “I didn’t think it was a big deal to ne”

In one quick motion Luke was back in her personal space, Rosey was silenced by the shock of his sudden movement. He placed two fingers below her chin lifting her head to look up at him. Their eyes meet and a split second later their lips are connected.

Stunned, was an understatement of how she was feeling in that moment. Still she responded moving and wrapping hers arms around his neck, kissing him back. Luke moved back slightly, breaking their kiss almost as fast as he had initiated it. He placed a hand on her cheek to softly rub his thumb across her cheek. Rosey pulled him back to her. “It wasn’t long enough.” She whispered to him and brushes her lips back across his.

Luke pulled his body back. He pushes his hands through his hair and blows out a big breath.

“The girl Rosey. she’s you. I never wanted to say anything because I’d rather know I have you in my life securely one way than risk it all by admitting how I feel but I can’t sit here any longer.”

“Luke.” Reaching out to cup his cheek and giving him her soft smile.

“Just think if you had said something months ago, you could’ve been doing that any time you wanted to.” She teased him, pulling at his shirt to pull him to her. “Because, what if I told you that the feelings are mutual?” She was grinning at him, their faces inches apart, awaiting his reaction.

He looked at the girl who had his whole heart in the palm of her hands. The girl he’s had to suppress his feelings for by forcing himself to try to have feelings for other girls. The one girl he did have some feelings for, knew that he would never truly love anyone but Rosey.

“Rosey, I’m not joking.. so please.”

“Neither am l Moose. I never in a million decades thought I had a chance of being with you. So are we figuring this out or are you just never going to kiss me again?”

“Oh trust me. I’m definitely kissing you again, many many times again. But first we’re figuring out today’s situation, I am making sure you’re absolutely okay with what happened. I want to make sure that he’s taken care of too. He’s not getting away with nearly hitting you, and then we talk about us. You, your happiness, safety, everything about you has always been and will always be my first priority.” He kisses her forehead as he confirms her hopeful question. “I’m definitely going to get ‘I told you so’s from Jack and Quinn” He chuckled a bit.

“You? They’re going to tease me for crying to them about how I never stood a chance.

The two sunk into the couch cuddling into one another comfortably sitting in the silence that fell over them. Luke’s mind going over what to do about Jason, while Rosey’s had already moved on to thinking of what her and Luke’s time together would be like. Sometime after the two fell asleep cuddled up, nothing their families hadn’t seen before. Only somehow it’s as if Ellen just knew something had shifted between her two beloved babies.

[tiyanasfantasy]

Marry Her Anway ❦.

wussup yall !

i just wanna say i haven’t wrote anything in over a year, mostly due to no motivation, but I’m back! i lost my other account so I’m starting fresh! ion want you to have no high expectations, lemme get used to it again ok? sorry if this is bad 😩..!

buttt i was just listening to this song called “Rude” and i wanted to write a lil story based off of it soo here i goo.

Warnings: Language, not proofread (i think that’s all)

Ony x BlackFem!Reader

Enjoy ❦.

you and ony have been dating for 3 years now. the two of you met during your freshmen year of high school but started dating during yalls senior year, and have been together ever since.

ony had met your family a few times before, they think ony’s a nice guy, i mean he has money, and makes sure you’re always safe and taken care of, and cares about your health, feelings and wellbeing. anyone who’s ever been around the two of you always says you compliment each other very well, your mother and the rest of your family loves ony.

well, everyone except your dad.

your dad HATES ony. why? he says he has a bad feeling about him, that he had bad intentions and he doesn’t want that “Weed selling thug” around his daughter. when you first brought ony home your father said “You’re not gonna last, i’ll give it a week before you’re crying and telling us he’s either in prison or cheated on you with some chick” long story short he’s a D1 hater

but to his surprise, 3 years later you and ony are still together, now 22 and 23 years old and still deeply in love with each other.

ony was very aware of your fathers dislike of him, that didn’t stop him from driving to his house on a saturday morning in the finest clothes he could find, and knocking loud and proud on his door. KNOCK KNOCk KNOCK

when your father looked out the peep hole and seen it was on the let out a groan and opened the door. “what?” he said with and irritation in his voice .

“g’morning sir” ony said with a big grin on his face. “i would ask to come in but-“ before he could finish he was cut off by your fathers voice “no, what do you want ? i don’t have time for this, i have things to do, where’s my daughter ?”

ony cleared his throat. “yns at her hair appointment, i wanted to ask you something tho, this is very important and i know you love your daughter a lot, so your opinion on this matters a lot.”

your dad raised his eyebrow at ony, motioning that he was listening.

“uh ion really know how to ask this but i know that your an old fashion man so uh..” ony pulls a ring from behind his back and holds it up to show your dad “can i… can i marry your daughter?”

as he was asking this question, your mother was walking by and was shocked by what she just heard and quickly ran over to the door and seen ony holding up a beautiful diamond ring

“Yes! Yes you can!” your mother said admiring the pretty ring infront of her husbands face.

meanwhile your dad stood there with a look of shock and disgust on his face. “he was asking me. and no, no you can’t. you’ll never get my blessing till the day i die, tough luck my friend, but the answer is no!”

your mom looked at your dad with a shocked look on her face “why you gotta be so rude??”

connie got tired of waiting in the car and came out to see what was taking ony so long “what’d he say?”

ony looked at connie and shook his head “man,he said no.”

connie looked over at your dad “that’s crazy man, whatchu say no for? you know how bad that must’ve hurt my man ego?”

ony looked over at your dad too “right, don’t you know i’m human and got feelings too?”

your dad rolled his eyes “i’ve been saying this for years, you’re no good for my daughter, i’m not gonna let you marry her then cheat and force her to go through more pain and a divorce”

connie mean mugged your dad “no disrespect pops, but ony been in your daughter since we was freshies, this guy got nothing but good intentions, i swear to you”

your mom nodding her head in agreement, seeing this made your dad scoff and shake his head “like i said you don’t have my blessing, if i don’t want you even dating my daughter what makes you think i’d allow you to marry her, the answer is no?”

your mother was standing there with her arms crossed shaking her head “you think i’d tell him he could if i tht out he had bad intentions?” your dad still feelings to remorse said “i don’t care, my answers no.”

“that’s fucked man, for real.” connie said.

ony just let out a dry laugh “Don’t worry bout it yall, im gonna marry her anyway” he said shrugging.

Connie laughed “that’s what i’m talking about” while your mother said “yeah, marry that girl!”

your father looked stunned as he repeated her words “marry that girl ??”

ony nodded his head saying “yeah, no matter what you say” he stopped and looked down at the ring one more time before closing the box and looking back at your after and saying “I’m gonna marry that girl, and we’ll be a family.”

ouuu girl yo daddy was soo mad, and his own wife was going against his word?? that bald headed ahh man was pissed baby, nobody cared tho, he walked back into the house mumbling under his funky ahh breath.

but that’s alll i’m writing tdy if u read this thank youuu and i hope you liked it (ts was mad corny no cap 😂😂) oh well ty for reading i love youuu!! kisses 💋💋 ! ❦.

[foreingersgod]

Hi, I just read the Caitlin Clark x tennis reader. Would you possibly do a Caitlin Clark x volleyball reader, where the reader is more femme. Something along the lines of maybe reader plays for Texas vb and wins the championship.. sorry for the poor wording. Keep up ur amazing work!!

-anon

i would love too! again, i apologize for any inaccuracies in how i wrote the volleyball aspect of this, i’ve never played before so bare with me ! <3

Championship . CC

pairing: caitlin clark x reader

synopsis: caitlin supports you during your big win

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

you had been working your ass off this season. it was your senior year at the college you attended and your last year playing volleyball with your team, you were very overwhelmed to say the least. there were so many nights spent on the court late at night, trying to perfect every move and every technique. you desperately wanted to take your team to the championship and win this title for them.

so you pushed yourself to your limits, still trying to maintain your grades and personal life. caitlin, your girlfriend, was incredibly understanding of course. she knew what it was like to want to win so bad, so bad that it felt like you were going to lose your mind. but she kept you grounded. you had always been there for her with basketball, and she wanted to show you that same appreciation for your dreams.

she attended every single game, often making the trip with you for away games. she’d bring flowers for you on occasion for your big wins, and she’d tend to bruises on your knees from diving and scrapes on your arms. she was so incredibly good to you.

you were lucky to have someone who understood the stress of the game and how it felt to struggle with wanting to win and not let down your team.

your hard work had paid off this season, though. thanks to your team, your coach, your family and friends, and especially caitlin. you led your team to victory and you were now heading to the final game in the champions ship. of course, your training remained intensive up until the game, stretching you thin.

the night before your game, caitlin made sure to treat you to a small night in to help you relax. she set up a movie and dinner, tended to your aching shoulders, completely shifting all of her attention to you. when you had woke up the next morning to get ready for the big day, she had even helped you get ready to help keep your mind at ease.

“you know i can braid my own hair, right?” you were finishing up your makeup, putting on some mascara and the lip gloss cait had gotten you for your anniversary a while back. caitlin had walked into the bathroom, offering to do your hair for you so you didn’t have to worry about it.

“yea i know, but i want to do it for you this time” she smiled at you through the mirror “like my way of sending you good luck, then you’ll know i’m always with you even on the court”

“that’s so sweet, cait” you turned around, pecking her on the cheek “just don’t do it too tight, please”

so there she stood, towering over behind you, twisting the 3 strands of your hair into a braid. her tongue sticking out slightly as she stayed focused on getting it perfect, just how you liked it. when she was finished, she proudly showed it off to you. you thanked her again before changing into your uniform and grabbing your bag.

once you arrived to the court for the championship, you and caitlin walked down to the locker room so she could give you a quick pep talk and a final kiss goodbye. “you’re going to absolutely kill it, babe, good luck!”

˗ˏˋ ´ˎ˗

after ages of waiting in the locker room; getting warmed up, strategizing with your team, talking with your coach, it was finally time to head onto the court. you could hear the entire audience cheering as the announcers called on each one of your teammates, the anticipation for the game sat thick in the air.

the game started off well, everyone was quick on their feet, prepared for the opponent’s next move. you were probably having one of the best games in your career and you could just about feel that trophy in your hands. you had managed to hold a lead for the majority of the game, but within the last few minutes it tied, all boiling down to one last play.

you held your breathe as your teammate served the ball, watching as it sailed over the net. you stood ready, feet planted, heart racing, and determined more than you had ever been. the ball bounced back and forth over the net before eventually hurdling your way. your muscles tensed, eyes glued to the ball. you leapt, body a blur of motion, hand connecting with the ball in a perfect spike. Time seemed to halt as the ball soared over the net, bypassing the outstretched arms of the opposing team. the crowd erupted into cheers as you all watched the ball land on their court. you had scored the final point.

your team immediately surrounded you, lifting you up and cheering your name. there were so many tears and so many hugs as you all cherished the win of your last game together.

once the excitement died down with your team, you noticed caitlin on the side, making her way over to you. you smiled so big your cheeks hurt, running over to her as fast as you could. caitlin scooped you up into her arms, spinning you around from how fast you ran into her. your head buried itself into the side of her neck as you cried tears of joy, her arms squeezing you tight.

“i’m so fucking proud of you baby” she whispered in your ear, praising you gently and setting you back down on your feet “the best fucking player out there, hands down”

“thanks, cait” you beamed, pulling her back into another hug. “i can’t believe it”

“i can! you’ve been working your ass off for four years to get to this point! you deserve it more than anyone, YN” she said, watching how you bounced with excitement.

you and caitlin celebrated a little bit more on the court before you had to spilt to go talk to your friends and family, she waited patiently for you, observing how happy you looked taking pictures with the trophy and talking to your friends. it was such a rewarding sight to see, she was the most proud a girlfriend could be.

even when you had both arrived home, still buzzing with the post-win high. she showered you with praise and attention, making sure you knew how happy she was for you.

cait made you feel so special, no matter how sad the loss or how big the win. you were so privileged to have her at your side, supporting you through such an amazing collegiate career.

[leeehye]

🫧˗ˏˋmy shy boy´ˎ˗ 🫧

[ summary ☁️] Seonghwa’s rejection to Y/n might turn out unexpected after time. But why did he reject her in the first place?

[ pairing ] nerd!seonghwa x prettygirl!reader /best friends to lovers

[ warnings ⚠️] none full fluff really. Just kissing- nothing happens, not fully proofread sorry

[ a/n 🍒] I’m sorry I’m taking long with the series, this is just a short drabble to make up 🌷

Y/n’s POV

I was finishing getting ready to go out with my best friend, Park Seonghwa, or as my other friends may know him, my long-time crush. Yet I have always lived a life of rejecting the truth ever since that day.

While putting in my earrings he came to my mind, and not like my best friend it made me remember that day, it was finals back in high school and I had invited him over to study for the math final.

We were sitting down on the floor in the living room each of us working and then tutoring each other like always and goofing around once in a while.

Until I caught myself admiring Seonghwa working on his iPad and then transferring information to his notes. His black hair, looked so soft and touchable, his big black eyes were focused on his work and his pretty lips gently parted as he mumbled what he wrote to himself.

I small smile formed on my face, before looking back at my laptop. I had developed a crush on Seonghwa probably since freshman year in high school and it was growing worse (bigger). We were in Senior year now, about to graduate and head to college and I was gathering the courage to tell him my feelings.

Though I had to admit it was scary, he was a really focused guy and he didn’t really talk about girls with me nor I have never seen him interested in love. As I was drowned in my thoughts his gentle voice let out a soft “oops” making me look. He had dropped his eraser and I smiled slowly reaching for it, and he did as well. Our fingertips gently touched.

We have held hands before, shared hugs or kiss each other’s heads but to me all of those little things mean more to me. But I am sure to him he just sees it as something normal. Like right now, the feeling of his warm fingers on my hand gave me soft butterflies on my belly.

Should I tell him right now? Gathering the courage I cleared my throat giving him his eraser before scooting closer to him our knees touching and I glanced at what he was looking at.

“um…Hwa?” I whispered to him, he hummed as he finished writing something before looking at me. I gulped softly swallowing the knot in my throat.

“have you ever…liked someone?” my question made his face turn into a confused one as his eyes moved to somewhere in the house as he seemed to think about it.

“oh…I had never actually thought about it Y/n…but I don’t think so…I think I’m just really focused on studying…I think I’m a weird nerd” he said laughing softly making me laugh with him shaking my head.

“no I don’t think so Hwa! Actually um…I think you’re really…cute” I finished my sentence quietly as he slowly stopped writing a formula in his notebook, but he didn’t look at me for a few seconds.

I was dying inside, wanting to take back everything but it was too late. I had told him what I thought of him but in a more honest tone. Which he quickly caught realizing I wasn’t joking, like we do.

His head slowly turns as his eyes meets mine. My body was hot, I couldn’t read him, his expression wasn’t good nor bad and I didn’t know what to expect.

Future me might regret it later but I slowly took the pencil off his hand and slowly his eyes watched my movements carefully and my hand slowly rested on his.

My eyes kept looking at him and taking the chance that his head was turned away, I leaned in a placed a soft kiss on his cheek. His eyes widened and his hand gently flinched under mine.

He looked at me, moving his hand away as his mouth gently opened and closed trying to find the words. I somehow got the feeling that he didn’t feel that same. Letting me know this was a one-sided love.

“Y/n…what—” Seonghwa stutter as his hand slowly touched the spot that I kissed. My shoulders slowly dropped looking down.

“Y/n I don’t…I didn’t expect this” he finished saying as my heart slowly broke, I looked at him quickly moving away.

“I’m…I’m really sorry…you’re right…um…I think we’re ready for the final on Wednesday…” I whispered trying to calm down and change the subject. Trying to forget what had happened.

“I’m tired…You should get home before it gets dark” I said picking up my books and notebooks getting up leaving to my room, and then a cried all night, from embarrassment, pain and for probably ruining my friendship with Seonghwa.

After that incident, at school Seonghwa told me to forget about what had happened and to act like it never happened and from then our friendship continued but I was mire reserved while working on moving on from him.

I came back to reality when my mom knocked on the door, I quickly grabbed my bag and opened the door.“Sweetie, Seonghwa is here. I think he hust parked” my mom said as I walked out

After she said that the doorbell rang, and we both smiled. “Yup that’s him mom” I said giggling and we headed down. I got the door and opened it seeing Seonghwa smiling as soon as he saw me.

“Hi…” I said sweetly as he returned the greeting before my mom appeared behind me.

“Oh good evening Mrs. Kim” he said to my mom giving her a smile showing his pretty teeth. My mom giggled and sneakily elbowed me.

“Just to let you guys know, don’t rush on getting back, just don’t be to noisy just in case—” my mom started making my eyes go wide.

“mom!” I quickly said stopping her from finishing as my cheeks turned red. Seonghwa was wearing his focused faced with what my mom was saying, which he probably understood. Before smiling when I stopped my mom.

After saying goodnight to my mom I got out of the house closing the door behind me. I awkwardly smiled at Seonghwa.

“sorry for my mom…um where are we going?” I said softly while we walked to his car as he opened the door for me.

“I was thinking we could go to the park, and maybe do some stargazing and just walk around and grab some snacks on the way” he suggested and I smiled nodding happily.

To some people it may seem boring, mostly for this society but I loved how we both were old fashioned, mostly me. The way he was simple in his ideas made me like him more, but we were just friends. Yet I couldn’t stop seeing him as the guy that would write you letters, have a cute lego building night, a reading date. He was perfect for that.

We had finally reached the park and started walking to out usual stargazing spot. I smiled noticing he was carrying a fluffy blanket.

“What? You didn’t think I was going to let you sit on the grass right? It’s really itchy after” he said making me laugh at his comment.

“thank you Hwa…” I quietly said earning a smile from him. While reaching our spot I noticed an old lady with an ice cream stand.

“Ooh Hwa, can we get ice cream?” I asked grabbing him by his sleeve pulling him over hearing him giggle. Reaching the ice cream stand I looked inside before picking chocolate for me and strawberry for Seonghwa.

“How you know?” Seonghwa asked as I looked at him. “Hm…I just do…That’s how good I know you” I responded playfully winking at him before looking at the nice ild lady getting some cash from my pocket but Seonghwa held my hand.

Bringing back the feeling of his soft hand on mine I stayed quiet watching him pay instead and I gently grabbed my ice cream and he took his, he still had my hand in his.

Not wanting to be reminded of that day I took my hand away from his and giggled.

“Can I try your ice cream?” I asked him sweetly and he just smiled allowing me to ad he got his ice cream come to me, as I softly tried his ice cream and that’s when he gently pushed it towards me getting it on my lips and some on my nose making me squeal.

“Hwa!!” I whined giggling licking the ice cream off my lips pouting trying to get myself cleaned while he was laughing. After a fee laughs he took out some napkins and came close to me cleaning my nose. He was close I could smell the strawberries 🍓 in his breath.

God, Y/n you need to contain yourself like you’ve been doing all along. He had a smile on his lips while cleaning me, his movements slowed down, and I see his eyes darken. His glance from my nose went to my eyes, and slowly to my lips.

I did want to get ahead of myself and took the napkin from him. “Thank you Hwa! Come on the evening is beautiful!” I said changing the subject going to our usual spot under a cherry blossom tree, it was so pretty. It wasn’t windy but it was just perfect and some of them were flying off.

Seonghwa laid the blanket down and we took a seat finishing our ice cream. I admired the evening as time went on and the sky started to tint itself with pink and orange.

“it looks so pretty, don’t you think?” I asked “Hwa—” I asked turning my head to him already staring at me as he jumped quickly shaking his head waking up from whatever thoughts he was having.

“Yeah, yes it’s…really pretty…” Seonghwa responded with his soft stuttering voice. I showed him a smile and gently hit his arm

“Um…Y/n? Did you ever…felt bad or…were you ever embarrassed of me? For being the quiet…nerd?” Seonghwa asked me making me look at him in shock.

“Of course not Hwa! What kind of question is that?!” I exclaimed gently touching his arm and he gently gave me a closed smile.

“I was just curious, since a girl like you back in…high school…it would have been strange…since you were the pretty girl…you know?” Seonghwa was talking nervously and started to make no sense but it only made me giggle.

“So does that mean? Wait…back then, god I wish I could turn back time” he whispered making me confused, I slowly tilted my head feeling his hand on top of mine. I looked down at it, we were now in opposite roles from back then.

He came close and my heart started raising, his strawberry breath reached my senses and the butterflies from high school were felt again. His big eyes were on mine before moving down, to my lips.

I opened my mouth to try and word something but I couldn’t, not because I couldn’t find the words but because before I could talk he crashed his lips on mine.

I was frozen, he was kissing me for the first time, and not on the cheek like I did, on the lips, they were so soft. The way he softly moved them, making me kiss him back after a few seconds. Our lips worked in sync sharing a sweet and soft kiss.

His hand slowly rearranged itself and intertwined our fingers together before moving his other hand to the back of my head, making us drop down slowly laying me on the blanket.

I had waited for this for so long I couldn’t let it go to waist. Still kissing him we separated a few millimeters to catch our breath before continuing and that’s when I gently licked his lower lip, I felt his reaction to my sudden movement making me blush.

We slowly pull away followed with a soft wet sound, and we just looked at each other with smiles on our faces and I slowly touched his shirt gently fixing his hoodie.

“W-why until now?” I whispered to him gently kissing his chin making him smile shyly.

“Because I was a coward Y/n I think that’s the only explanation there is…” he started as he looked down before tuning him glance back at me.

“I was scared? Of what others might think, imagine the quiet nerd dating the prettiest and sweetest girl, the class president? I just…I think you were to much for me Y/n” he whispered softly pushing a strand of hair behind my ear.

“and you don’t know how much I regret not responding to you that day…everyday I thought about it…and well…I hope I’m not to late” Seonghwa whispered to me making me give him a sad smile.

He was getting out of his comfort zone and expressing his feelings for me, of course it wasn’t too late, my love for him was still there and he was new to all this, I couldn’t blame him. He was so cute!

“Of course it’s not too late Hwa…yes I was sad that day but our friendship was way more important but now that…I know how you feel I’m so happy” I said gently cupping his face as his cheeks tinted red and looked down shyly.

“Do you…want to…give me a chance? I promise to show you all my love, because I’ve always wanted to be more than friends with you” Seonghwa whispered while admiring my eyes making me blush as I have him a gentle nod.

“Yes Hwa I will give you a chance, but you better not hurt me like that day” I said playfully kissing his cheek as he shook his head wanting to forget about that day before pecking my lips but I pulled him down into a more passionate kiss.

After sharing a passionate kiss he was laying down with one arm behind his head and the other arm around me as we watched the stars. I couldn’t ask for more, I loved my shy boy so much.

IM IN LOVE WITH PARK SEONGHWA 🤎 and this just made me love him more this is so cuteee!

I’m sorry for taking long on a dare after all and sweet truth I have been busy and I couldn’t really get into it fully! I posted this to update you guys with something ☕

Any interaction is really appreciated. 💕

[katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Prompt:

“PSA: Girls who wear Skechers don’t give BJs”

Have some high school Everlark, Anon. They’re seniors in this, so 18 or about to turn 18 years old. RATED M.

***

Peeta smirks slightly at the ridiculous graffiti on the bathroom wall. What, he wonders, does a girl’s choice of footwear have to do with her willingness to go down on a guy?

He digs a sharpie from his book bag and uncaps it before scrawling a response.

Or maybe you’re just an asshole no one would blow anyway.

He finishes and washes his hands, adjusting his bag on his shoulder as he makes his way towards his locker.

“What’s so funny?”

He glances up and blinks at Katniss Everdeen. Momentarily speechless at the sight of her, cheeks flushed and braid slightly disheveled.

“What?” he asks and she motions towards his face.

“You were smiling. That cute little smile you get when you’re amused.”

“Cute little smile?” he teases, his mouth stretching wider into a real smile. “You think my smile is cute?”

“Shut up, Peeta. It’s been six months,” Katniss mutters with a roll of her eyes.

“And what? I can’t still be in awe that the Katniss Everdeen not only actually agreed to date me but also thinks my smile is cute?”

“I’m dating you strictly for the cheese buns and the guaranteed prom date,” she retorts as she places a hand on his shoulder for balance. She works off one of her character shoes.

“I’ll take it.” He holds still for her and nods towards her feet. “Show choir practice ran late?”

“Trinket’s got a bur up her butt about the performance this weekend. You know how she gets.”

“Girls. You cannot hold back. Each movement must maximize the fabulousness of the routine!” He mimics and Katniss snorts slightly.

“I just wanted to get out of there as fast as possible,” she explains why she didn’t change her shoes before leaving the choir room.

“I’ll rub your feet later,” Peeta promises quietly. Katniss’s expression softens and her eyes dart around the hall before she leans in and presses a quick peck to his lips.

“And there’s another reason why I’m dating you.”

“Don’t get too excited,” he says. “I may ask you to reciprocate tonight. My calves are still burning.”

“Coach still pushing you guys hard over that bullshit second place last week?” He nods and glances down as she tugs on her sneakers. Sketchers.

His lips quirk and she freezes with her left shoe only partially on her foot.

“There it is again. That smile.”

“It’s nothing. Dumb graffiti on the bathroom wall.”

“Oh?” Her eyebrow lifts and Peeta sighs, knowing he won’t get away with distracting her again. He leans in close to whisper in her ear, even though it’s over an hour since school let out and they’re probably the only ones left in the halls.

“It says ‘PSA: Girls who wear Sketchers don’t give BJ’s.’” Katniss makes an indignant noise and Peeta chuckles lightly as he returns to his locker, finishing swapping out what he needs to finish his homework tonight. “Told you it was dumb.”

“And clearly wrong,” she says, sounding almost offended.

He shuts his locker and turns to her, amused now by how pissed off she looks. “Come on, Katniss. It’s probably just some butt hurt Nice Guy whining because no one would blow him anyway, Sketchers or not.”

“Then why were you smiling?” Katniss demands and realization of what she must be thinking about smacks him in the face. He steers her towards the doors, out into the parking lot where his beat up hand me down car is parked.

“Because I wrote something to that effect in response,” he tells her.

“Oh.” She says, but she still can’t quite meet his eyes. “So the other day, when I couldn’t… you know…”

They’ve reached his car and Peeta maneuvers them so that she’s backed up against it. He leans in close, nuzzling beneath her ear and lacing their fingers together at their sides.

“I don’t care, Katniss. How I feel about you isn’t dependent on whether or not you do something like that.”

“But… you want it,” she says softly.

“Of course I want it,” he whispers. “If it happens, I’m gonna love every second of it. But if it never happens, that won’t change the way I feel about you. Okay?”

She’s still biting her lip, but she nods and lets Peeta open the car door for her.

“Come on. Let’s get you home so we can take care of your feet.”

She climbs in and he makes his way around the car to do the same. They’re mostly quiet on the drive to her place, but when he parks in her driveway, he can’t resist leaning over to kiss her once. Just a quick little one because he knows how she feels about people seeing them. Mainly her neighbors, in this case.

“Besides,” he murmurs when they separate, “how am I gonna complain about it when you changed your mind because… what was it you said?”

He knows he’s got a shit eating grin on his face now, and Katniss is blushing and scowling at him.

“You know exactly what I said. And that smile is not cute,” she huffs, motioning towards him. But he still can’t wipe it off his face as she clambers from the car and he follows her.

He doesn’t think he’ll ever forget what happened when they’d gotten a little hot and heavy, tucked away in a dark corner of her backyard while her parents were working late and Prim was sleeping over at a friend’s. The sudden drop of his stomach when she tugged his shorts down and his cock bobbed up only for a dark scowl to take over her face. And Peeta started to panic that there was something off putting about his dick. Maybe he hadn’t washed well enough after practice and smelled a bit funky? He was about to suggest they try something else, about to call it off himself when she’d blurted out one of the biggest ego strokes she’s ever given him.

“How am I supposed to fit all of this in my mouth? Unhinge my jaw?”

Not that she’d never seen him before, but he supposed she’d never given much thought to sucking his dick until that moment. Her perturbation had put a rather abrupt halt to their making out, but Peeta sure as shit wasn’t gonna complain about it.

Her words had spawned an entirely new string of fantasies that had driven his frantic shower time masturbations for almost a week since it happened. Katniss getting him off with her mouth, without putting his cock in her mouth at all. Other than maybe just the tip.

Inside her house, Katniss calls out to make sure Prim’s already made it safely home on the bus, bringing him out of his memories and back to the present.

“I’m here!” Prim shouts back and Katniss double checks the notes in the kitchen so she knows when to get dinner started for her parents.

Peeta stands beside her and helps where he can. When they reach a point where Katniss can take a break, she takes his hand and leads him to her bedroom. Technically, her parents have a rule against Katniss having any boys in her room, especially when they’re not here. His palms sweat a little with nerves, that they might get caught, but this isn’t the first time they’ve broken the rules. And Prim’s already shown she won’t tattle on them.

He’s expecting her to sit on the bed and take her shoes off, but instead she locks the door and shoves Peeta back on the bed. A second time to get him to lay on his back.

“Foot massage?” he asks dumbly as she climbs on top of him, hovering over him on all fours. But then her mouth is on his and he gives up on talking. Resting his hands lightly on her hips, he follows her lead with the kisses. She’s being aggressive today and he shudders when she bites down on his bottom lip. Whimpers into her mouth when her hand slides down his body and starts palming him through his sweatpants.

“Katniss,” he whispers when she lifts her head and slides her hand back out of his pants. “Come here. I wanna taste you.”

He moves to push her hips up his body so she’s sitting on his face, but Katniss shakes her head. And then his throat constricts and dries out completely as she turns herself around, still on all fours, so her knees are on either side of his chest.

“Katniss what are you—?” He tries to ask as she shoves his sweat pants down his thighs. He obediently lifts his hips to help, hissing and gripping her thighs as she wraps one hand around his cock to pull him out of his shorts.

“I’m proving that asshole graffiti wrong,” she murmurs and Peeta’s eyes roll back in his head as her lips slide warm and wet over his tip. When he turns his head to moan into her pillow, his eyes land on her shoes, still on her feet. Her Sketchers. He’s staring at them a few minutes later when he warns her that he’s about to come. And he’s still staring at them when he resurfaces from the haze of his release, a slow smile spreading over his mouth.

[randomshyperson]

Spring Break - Cheerleader!Wanda Maximoff x Reader

Summary: Every year during Spring Break, you travel to a camp filled with outdoor competitions. It comes with a bonus of facing your rival from back when the whole thing started, and there's nothing more attractive than Wanda Maximoff kicking your ass in every game. Some might say you let her win just to see her smile, but maybe that's loser talk.

Warnings: (+18), enemies to lovers, so much teasing and bickering, a lot of making out and kissing, bottom!Cheerleader Wanda being a tease, soft first-time smut, semi-public, gays who can't keep their hands off each other, fluff, mild angst when they’re being stubborn, friends being done, high school but summer camp vibes, happy ending i promise. Words: 11.176k

A/N-> I’m back with enemies to lovers (and some smut finally). This fic is quite old, but it was abandoned; after seeing Wednesday and Bianca dueling I regained inspiration for what I was doing in the 5k that was already done. You can thank Netflix for this one.  I wasn't sure whether to split it into two parts or not, but I think I have longer fics than this one so I decided to post them all together. If you notice there's a pause, because I wrote it as two different parts, you didn't.

General Masterlist | AO3 | Wattpad

--//--

There was something about pissing you off that made Wanda twitch.

It started so long ago, when you first bumped into each other at Avengers Camp three years ago, and Wanda had the best and most stressful Spring Break since high school began; all because you were there and she was winning.

Now, senior year had arrived, and the annual tradition of joining the spring games for an entire week in the middle of nature at one of the most renowned vacation camps in the United States was going to happen again.

Wanda likes to believe that she was not expecting this. It would actually be absurd to admit that she waited, every year, for the familiar image of your old Danvers cap and your bored expression leaving the bus that brought your schoolmates, but if Wanda would be honest, now sitting in the driveway waiting for their driver to finish unloading the car while she lets her gaze run across the entrance courtyard of the Camp, pretending not to look for someone and yet feeling her whole body warm-up when she recognizes the female figure in the crowd of students from the rival school, Wanda has to admit a few things. First, you grew annoyingly attractive every year. The second, she couldn't wait to beat your ass at every game.

"Man, I can't believe we're competing with the Skrulls again, it's the third year in a row." Her twin's complaint made Wanda blink away, her face half-reddened with fear that she had been caught staring. But Pietro seemed busy enough with his own complaints. 

"Well, at least we're winning." Wanda retorted making him laugh. 

"Fair point." He said and looked at her. "Speaking of which, do you know what games you'll be competing in this year yet?"

"Um, I think I'll check with the girls first. I don't want to end up alone in swimming like last year." Wanda mutters and Pietro nods in understanding. 

Soon the monitors are addressing those who have already arrived, and Wanda loses sight of you - not that she was looking - and busies herself with going to the cabin that would be hers for the next week.

You, on the other hand, lose your bag in a pile.

"God, why does this always happen." You grumble in irritation as you manage to see the handle of your blue suitcase, below a few hundred others. 

"Every year, Y/N. And I keep saying, carry your bag on your lap, and you keep ignoring me." Your sister, Carol, comments beside you, throwing an arm around your shoulders. You roll your eyes, gently pushing her away. Carol is happy, with her dark, safe suitcase under her arm. 

"Stop bugging me and help me." You grumble and she laughs before trying to find a better position for you two to pull your bag together.

With a little effort, you manage to pull your backpack out, and you stumble backward with a grunt - bumping into someone who keeps you from falling to the ground - as Carol pulls your bag out of the pile.

"Yay, teamwork!" She celebrates on the other side, but you are busy turning to thank her who held you up, only to face your best friend with a small smile.

"Bucky!" you greet him excitedly, turning your body to hug him tightly by the neck, and laughing when he spins you in the air. 

You met Bucky at camp, and despite going to a rival school, you had enough things in common for the friendship to grow strong even though he was studying and living almost on the other side of the country. Fortunately, Skype and Whatsapp existed, and even as spring ended, you were still friends. 

"Hello, my favorite Danvers. " He greets like that only to annoy your sister behind you, who rolls her eyes and chuckles, moving closer to hug him as well as soon as you let go. "How was your trip, girls?"

"Y/N slept the whole way." Carol replies.

"And Carol ate the whole way." You accuse taking your bag from her hand and ignoring the grimace to add, "Oh, no, wait, I made a mistake. She was actually daydreaming about Natasha Romanoff."

"Shut up!" Carol grunted quickly, trying to hit you, a soft pink appearing on her cheeks. You fled from her hands, laughing and running toward the check-in booth where the monitors were calling out names, and Bucky shook his head for interaction watching your sister run after you.

Avengers Camp was huge, and besides the cabins divided up among all the students who stayed there during the vacation seasons, there was a lake, volleyball and tennis courts, an auditorium, and even an arcade. 

You were lucky to end up in a cabin with your sister and the other girls in your class - the brilliant Gwen Stacy and Darcy Lewis - who didn't seem too interested in the sports competitions but would surely win any of the scientific tests.

After packing up, all the campers were called to the main cabin, where there were tables scattered throughout the area, where the teenagers were seated ready to enjoy the delicious lunch and listen to the welcome speech.

Nick Fury was the Camp Director and no one could ever tell the real story behind his eye patch, each year new campers came up with new legends that made you laugh - like the story that an alien cat had been responsible for cutting the limb off.

"[...] It gives me great pleasure to welcome the honorary Skrulls from California!" Announced Fury and all the students of your school made a chorus of claps and shouts of celebration, banging on their desks. Fury laughed from his seat in the center of the room, waiting for the commotion to pass before announcing the other school. "And equally welcome, the so-far undefeated champions of the Spring Competitions, the Avengers!"

The rival school made an even better commotion, almost starting a food war. But you were having fun, even though your school had never beaten the Avengers in their home, it was to be expected that they would want to keep their camp as an undefeated venue. Even though last winter during the interclass event, the soccer team lost badly to another school. There was a taunt among the students that if the Avengers played away from home, they would lose. But you and the rest of your school were more interested in proving that you could beat them anywhere, and this was your last chance to be part of it.

As Fury continued with the general announcements - about the rules, and the competitions, concepts that were already very familiar to you after three years - you felt Bucky pull your cap off your head, muttering something about manners that made you laugh.

You were adjusting the tousled strands of hair when Carol gave you a gentle nudge.

"Your majesty will speak now." She sneers and you aren't even confused, knowing full well what this is about before you even raise your eyes to the center of the room again, and feel your stomach do a full turn at seeing Wanda Maximoff step up to the podium with the confidence and posture worthy of a queen.

You met Wanda in first grade, and from the first conflicting interactions, you have an obligation to call her a princess. Because the perfect little girl's posture is too annoying for you not to do so. This, and the fact that her father is a famous politician, and the family is deep in the money, kind of lives up to the nickname. Also, it gives you real amusement to see the pink in her cheeks when you call her that.

And Wanda, of course, is the representative speaker at the games. So every year until she graduates, she announces the competitions and collects the names, as well as basically running the whole thing with the other monitors. It's like Queen Bee and her subjects, and neither you nor any of your friends stop making fun of it.

"I didn't think the Maximoffs were going to come this year." Bucky comments low beside you, as Wanda announces that year's games. And you frown in confusion.

"What, but Wanda has basically been representing this competition forever." You reason, but Bucky shrugs his shoulders.

"I know, but I heard they were going back to their country for college." Bucky retorts. "And you have to admit, while Avengers Camp is fun, it's not worth much here for us to get admission points."

Carol murmurs in agreement. "Man, now I'm pissed they didn’t leave. Imagine a year without having to put up with Little Miss Perfect, a stolen dream." She mocks and you force a laugh, a strange feeling in your stomach. You should be happy at the possibility of not having to put up with Wanda. But it occurs to you that the games wouldn't be as much fun without her.

Clearing your throat, you poke at your food with your fork. 

"I think I'll sign up just for racing this year." Bucky comments beside you. "We have Football season, and I don't want to end up accidentally hurting myself before the games."

"But you love wrestling." You say but he shrugs his shoulders, offering you a small smile.

It occurs to you as the announcements end, and students have to move to leave their names for the competitions, that the seniors are not very excited. Probably the stress of college admissions, you can relate to that yourself, still, it's a little sad to see how little participation from classmates your age.

"Danvers sisters, good to have you back for another year." Fury greets you excitedly as soon as you and Carol approach the registration stand - where there is a small crowd of students trying to choose which games they will compete in, and put their names on the prepared murals. 

"Hey, Nick!" Carol greets back, doing a handshake that she never taught you with the principal. You merely offer him a smile. "How's the family?"

You took the attention away from your sister as you approached the mural that read Wildness Competitions, adjusting your cap slightly as you did so. There were many options for activities at Avengers Camp, and you usually chose mostly the ones that the public school wouldn't give you access to for the rest of the school year, like Hispism or Fencing, the latter being a secret talent.

"Well, if it isn't the Skrulls’ Golden Armor Knight." A female voice mocked behind you, and you were smiling before you even turned around. 

"Maximoff, it's always a displeasure." You retorted sarcastically, your hands in your pockets. Wanda doesn't flinch at your rudeness, tossing her hair to the side as she approaches with some buttons which she as a representative, needs to put on the murals to signal about the teams.

"Having trouble picking your sport this year, Danvers? A suggestion, try to remember that you are going to lose no matter what."

"Really? 'Cause as far as I remember, that shiny trophy up there has my name on it." You retort nodding to where the fencing awards are set in the corner of the main hall. Wanda rolls her eyes. "But don't worry, princess, I'll go easy on you this year."

Wanda lets out a wry laugh, her eyes glittering in defiance.

"I guess it's more the other way around, huh?" She retorts. "Or in case you've forgotten, the highest number of wins is still mine."

Wanda had a point. You could win at Fencing all you wanted - and get the ridiculous nickname of Skrulls’ Golden Armor Knight from the girl just to annoy you - but Wanda still won everything. From archery to fighting to spelling. Never in a million years would you admit that maybe you were losing because you were busier trying not to be distracted by her annoyingly pretty face.

"Let's see how this year turns out." You tell her with clear defiance in your voice, and Wanda smiles, moving closer, and you swallow dryly, your body tensing up. But she is just reaching for something behind you - a jar with other buttons - and offers you an innocent smile.

"Game on, Danvers." She says, grabbing one of the items and placing it in your hands before turning around, hips swaying more than necessary as if she knew exactly where you were going to look, and you choke softly, your face heating up before you shake your head and focus on the badge in your hands. The symbol of your school pinned on it.

–//–

The first day of competitions was a complete success for the Avengers, which means it was complete hell for you.

Unlike basically all the rest of your colleagues who were taking it easy, you almost destroyed a snack machine that refused to deliver your energy drink after you finished in second place for the fourth consecutive activity. If anyone asked, you were annoyed because of the little victorious smile Wanda had on her face all morning, but no one asked, because Carol had to drag you away from the brunette to avoid you jumping on her neck and pulling that little smile off yourself.

"It's so strange to see you like this." Your sister comments as soon as you guys are so back at the cabin, and you flopped down on the bed, grunting irritably against the pillow.

Gwen - who participated in the short race and was still wearing the same uniform as you - handed Carol the small bottle of energy drink that the machine released after you and Wanda got into a heated argument. 

"Like what?" you asked confused with your voice muffled by the pillowcase. Your sister laughed.

"So angry." She clarified by sitting down in one of the armchairs to take off her shoes. "I'm the hothead Danvers, you know? You're like, so good vibes all the time."

"I agree, and I don't even hang out with you guys that much." Gwen remarks before moving to grab her shower stuff. You prop yourself up on the bed with a chair.

"What are you trying to tell me?" You ask your sister, and she gives a short chuckle, shrugging.

"Nothing, I just think it's weird." She mumbles. "You're so calm usually, but just walk into the same room as Wanda and you turn into a ticking time bomb. It feels like she has some sort of switch, or as that other saying goes, of the matchstick and the spark-"

"This conversation doesn't make any sense." You interrupt by frowning and standing up. "I am as I have always been, and it's not my fault if Wanda is the most annoying creature on the planet who keeps wanting to beat me at everything. I'll be taking a shower before you come up with any other weird sayings."

The locker room was a complete mess, but at least you were distracted by Gwen's comments about the competition and about the Avengers planning a sleepover to care about.

Since the next competitions were not until the afternoon, you finished your shower and decided to put on a comfortable sweater to spend the next few hours with Bucky at the lake, and were just finishing putting on your socks when giggles attracted your attention.

Well, you recognized the sound, and you had a hundred insults ready to use, but when you turned your face and had the image of Wanda in a towel, they all disappeared with any other coherent thought.

She was laughing at some comment her colleague made, but when her gaze met with yours, her smile faltered.

"Hey, Danvers, nice running today." She complimented, the sentence loaded with sarcasm. 

"Yeah, Y/N, congratulations on the silver medal." Wanda's friend, you think her name is Monica, said and unlike the brunette, she seemed completely sincere. 

You didn't respond with more than a hum of understanding, suddenly hyperaware that Wanda was without clothes just a few feet away from you. Turning your attention back to your socks, you cleared your throat softly, trying to keep your gaze in front of you.

Wanda took up a locker three feet away from yours. You could see her figure out of the corner of your eye. Long legs exposed and-"

You cleared your throat again, shaking your head quietly. 

"Are you going to watch the boys' race, Y/N?" It was Monica who asked - from the locker behind yours - and you frowned slightly.

"Hmm, I'm not sure." You muttered, feeling your face heat up when you saw Wanda take her underwear out of the cabinet. " I don't really have anyone to watch there."

"Really? But I thought you and that long-haired cutie were going out." Monica comments excitedly, and you turn your head to her with confusion. "What's his name again? Ben?"

"Bucky." You correct and don't notice the way Wanda is glancing at you out of the corner of her eye, pretending to be busy with her own clothes. "And we're not dating, he's just my friend. Besides, he decided not to run."

Monica makes a noise of agreement, and you look away because she is suddenly changing and you don't want to be disrespectful.

"We'll watch Pietro race, but I'd honestly rather hang out at the arcade." Monica continues. "We can play something after the race, can you call your sister to join us?"

"Sure, Monica." You mutter finishing your shoes. You stand, and turn around, ready to say goodbye, but you face Wanda without a towel and simply freeze.

She, despite the soft pink appearing on her cheeks, holds your gaze, a small smile threatening to leave her lips as she works to put on her bra. You let your gaze lower, your heart racing in your ears as the image of full breasts and down to her belly and-"

"O-kay, I'll see you later." You gasp with a very hot face, stumbling off the bench and running so fast from the locker room that you leave Monica with a confused expression.

"What was that?" She asks, and Gwen, who you didn't even remember to say goodbye to, shrugs her shoulders.

"I think she may be trying to avoid arguments." She suggests, and the comment makes Wanda sigh softly as she finishes dressing. "Speaking of which, Maximoff, any chance you'll go easy on Y/N? She gets stressed when she loses to you."

Wanda chuckles. " Not a chance."

–//–

One of the afternoon competitions, besides the boys' race, was archery. Which meant watching Kate Bishop, a girl from the year before yours, destroy all the older students. Her coach, Clint Barton, kept smiling proudly with each completed trial, and you overheard some students from the Avengers saying how he was sure to write a letter of recommendation there when the time came for Kate to enter the university.

However, this year you were distracted. Bucky and Carol were sitting next to you, clapping and whistling for Kate along with her friends - Yelena Belova, who was coincidentally the sister of your sister's long-time crush, Natasha Romanoff, and Steve Rogers and Sam Wilson, the latter two being on the soccer team with Bucky.

While everyone was impressed by the long-range targets, you were trying to keep the image of Wanda out of your head. The problem was that ever since you saw her without a towel in the locker room, the curve of her waist, and of her breasts seemed to have stuck.

"Are you okay?" Bucky's voice snapped you out of your fantasy. "Your face is red."

"I'm fine." You mumble grudgingly, stretching out your legs and letting your cap cover your eyes. "I'm just resting my eyes."

"Kate just hit a target in the sky." He comments. " It was pretty incredible."

"I bet it was." You merely reply, the image of something far more interesting in your head. Bucky makes a confused face but doesn't insist. 

When the next contestant was announced, you grunted softly and started to get up, muttering that you were feeling queasy and were going to get some air. The ironic comment about you being outside already made by Carol was ignored.

You ended up in the back of one of the huts, and as you leaned your back against the wood, you took a deep breath.

Stop thinking about her. Stop thinking-

"Victory is already ours but you didn't have to skip the game." The teasing made you flinch. On any other day, before what happened in the locker room at least, any comment from Wanda would have been rebutted with an equally sarcastic one. But the image of her naked torso was still fresh in your mind, insistent, and you just wanted to be left alone.

"Fuck off, Maximoff." Aggressiveness failed in your tone, as your voice faltered hoarsely over your thoughts. You didn't have time to fix your mistake - Wanda was already mockingly chuckling, slow steps toward you.

"You know, I've been practically fencing back home. I even have a private tutor now." She informs you, to which you just roll your eyes without patience, trying to look at everything but the girl in front of you. "Maybe it's time for that trophy to stamp another name."

You chuckled dryly, stealing a glance at her.  "In your dreams."

"No, I'll just kick your ass in reality." She assures you finally close enough. "It'll be too easy, you're all distracted this year..."

Your breath hitched in your throat as Wanda simply began to move closer, eyes intense and provocative as her tone of voice. You stared at her in shock at the magnetic tension between you, wondering if she would have the courage to break the distance as you wished to do. Wait, since when did you-

"Maximoff, Danvers." The voice of one of the monitors broke the momentum completely and made you both jump in fright, away from each other as if you had been burned. "The game is still going on. What are you two doing alone here? I hope it's not another fight-"

"No, sir-"

"Go mind your own business, Logan." You cut off the apologies of the good girl next to you, practically pushing her out of your way as you moved away from the cabin wall. The monitor grimaced at the hostility, but you knew him long enough to know you wouldn't have a problem. Logan was like an older sibling, and you didn't need another in this position. "We were just talking, or rather, Maximoff was bugging me, as usual."

Wanda snorted angrily, but Logan rolled his eyes impatiently at the whole thing. "Back to the game, girls." He ordered, ignoring your grumbling that you were already walking anyway and waiting for Wanda to do the same.

She followed you back to the bow field - Surprisingly quiet. You were too busy trying not to think about her to notice, and at some point, you both took completely opposite directions, drifting apart in the crowd of students.

Carol, however, noticed you coming, and as soon as you were seated again, she looked at you with a frown.

"What were you and Wanda doing?"

The question startled you as if your sister had been able to read your last thoughts. You grimaced immediately, knowing that your face was blushing.

"What? Nothing." You assured quickly, irritation in your voice. "We just bumped into each other in the entryway."

Carol didn't buy the lie judging by the look on her face, but she didn't have time to question - Kate won the event undefeated, and a crowd of clapping and celebrations erupted in the open field.

With the last match of the day, and having won the vast majority of the challenges, the Avengers were happy enough for a Victory party - Which was nonetheless a direct tease to the Skrulls, who by some miraculous luck, if manage to win all the next day's matches, could win the tournament. In this way, the crowd took the celebration back to the camp's main campfire, where the staff arranged dining tables and benches for the first outdoor meal of the holidays.

Alcohol was obviously not allowed, and that never stopped campers from smuggling it between disguised water bottles. 

As one of the athletes for tomorrow's competitions, you decided to stay away from alcohol - quite unlike your sister, who took advantage of vodka shots to build up the courage to talk to Natasha Romanoff.

You were watching her awkward attempts from a safe distance with Bucky beside you, laughing softly when the boy announced that he was also going to try his luck with the one he liked tonight.

The thing was, Bucky didn't like anyone - As far as you knew. So the information caught you by surprise.

"Wait. What?" 

But he chuckled, waving to a front with his glass, and you frowned trying to find the person. It took you a moment to realize that it was Sam Wilson, Co-Captain of the American Football Team. Avenger.

"Wow, he's..."

"An avenger, I know."

You chuckle, hiding your smile as you look down at your soda glass. "I was going to say handsome."

Bucky was blushing. You gave him the privacy to keep your gaze on Sam, knowing it would get worse if you stared at your friend. 

"Fuck, yeah, I know." He gasped softly making you laugh. 

"When did this happen?"

He shrugged. "I don't know, back at school?" He starts half uncertain. "We played together and he started to follow me on Instagram. One day, just playing conversation and even insults until it turned into a habit..." He jokes with a short laugh. "We came back here and it made sense. You know?"

You giggle at your friend's nervousness and clumsiness, finding the whole thing kind of adorable. "Yeah, I guess so." You say. "Go ahead, talk to him."

He sighs, deciding to turn his glass all at once before waving at you and heading off to talk to Sam Wilson.

Alone, you think about joining some colleagues closer to the fire, but nearby laughter catches your attention.

There is something about Wanda Maximoff's beauty that takes your breath away. And it's not fair that it seems to grow in the dim light of the moon and the stars. And Wanda, surrounded by her friends, laughing at something she has been told, with soft dimples in her cheeks, it is even more unfair the way the image makes your stomach turn nervously.

Has she always been beautiful like this, since her first win, and you were too busy with the game to notice? Or somehow, the school has changed you enough in the last year to notice that although Wanda was the most insufferable person you knew, she needs to be recognized as the most beautiful girl you have ever seen.

And then, if you think about it as you notice her not minding having her moment with her friends interrupted to help a freshman camper who seems lost as to where their cabin is, you'll realize that Wanda, when she's not competing with you and testing all your buttons, is not so insufferable. You will notice that she has always been kind and thoughtful and that people don't make her the leader of everything because she is rich or beautiful, but because she is the best at organizing games, and guiding people. And if you think about it, you will recognize that Wanda is just as tired as you are at the races, sweaty and breathless, and just as bright and hard-working at everything. 

You suddenly think that Wanda deserved to win for the first time, as you have never acknowledged before. She must really be much brighter than you, because she surely wouldn't have taken all this time to realize what she was feeling.

Did it occur to you, so many years after you first laid eyes on her, that now you were really seeing her. There, near the campfire, accepting some more soda, so, so gorgeous.

'Fuck." You gasped in realization under your breath into the night, feeling something burn behind your eyes. 

Wanda, as if she could guess, even sense the moment you pined for her attention, looked away for her friends until she met your gaze. She hesitated before assuming the same expression as always - Ready to torment you - but this time, you looked on the verge of tears when you stared back.

The second she noticed, she frowned in concern, all the masked arrogance falling from her face. But you didn't give her any time to react, you left your glass on the first table you could find and practically ran away from there. From her.

And of course, Wanda would be stubborn and insistent enough to follow you. Not daring to call your name on the way as if she guessed that you were going to run until you disappeared, or worse, turn to her and tell her to mind her own business.

When you walked inside the fencing hall, empty of course, she let her head work without thinking straight about what she was accusing you of.

You barely reached the sword cabinet when she walked in through the ajar door.

"I should have known you would try to cheat." She sneered convinced that she had caught you in the act. You froze, not for the reasons she imagines, your hands still on the closet lock. "That's sad, even for you, Danvers."

"Shut up." 

She chuckled wickedly, crossing her arms as she stopped a little behind you. "Come on, if you admit it, I might consider not reporting you to the juries."

It was your turn to chuckle - Unlike her, almost tearfully. Wanda hesitated, confused, even more so when you turned to her, and your face had tears dried on the way there on your cheeks.

"Get out of here before I do something stupid." 

But Wanda uncrossed her arms, concern on her face. "I've never seen you cry before."

"Wanda, I swear to god-"

"Not even when you broke your arm back in the first year." She recalls as she takes a step forward, and another, raising one of her hands toward your face slowly. You know you should move away, push her before she could realize how much you were trembling, how hot your skin was, but you couldn't move a muscle it. Wanda touched your cheek and you gasped, unable to keep your eyes open. "Sweetheart, what happened?"

It was so tender, so loving that your heart jumped in your chest. You almost sobbed, but instead, your emotions mixed and you raised your hand to her wrist, gripping hard but not pushing away, your angry eyes hiding insecurity that Wanda could only see because she knew you well enough, perhaps better than anyone else, even if neither of you had ever admitted this.

"Why do you care?" That's what you retorted, and it took her by surprise because Wanda didn't expect to have to answer that question. Not to her father, when she insisted that she was going back to Camp this year and he demanded a reason, nor to Pietro who questioned her why she still kept the brooch with the Danvers name on it that you lost to her in a card game in sophomore year. And even less to you, with tears in your eyes inside the hall of the only game she could never win.  Her hesitation made you let go of her wrist, a tired sigh leaving your lips. "You don't. I...please, Wanda, just leave me alone."

You scared her. You looked so small, so insecure and uncertain, vulnerable. You? Never in a million years had you allowed Wanda to see you like this. She didn't know how to cope with it.

Your footsteps moved away, and by your breath, you were crying. She came closer but lost the courage to break your privacy. Her mind filled with anxiety - It didn't matter how long you had known each other. You were rivals, nothing more than that. Wanda had no right to invade your space.

"Go away." You insisted seriously with a voice hoarse with emotion and Wanda shuddered. It was different from the anger of losing - It was almost as if she had stabbed you in the back. Or had hurt you.

She swallowed dryly, and before you could repeat the order, she spoke:

"If I win tomorrow, you will tell me what happened."

The deal hangs in the air for a few moments, carrying the tension between the two of you. Wanda almost decides to leave without an answer when you sigh.

"What if I win?"

She smiles even though you can't see it. "You can pick your prize." She says and doesn't wait for you to think about it, clearing her throat before murmuring goodnight and leaving the hall.

You walk away to the trophy cabinet again and stare at one of the photographs of last year's Fencing team. You and Wanda are in it, in opposite positions. And for the first time in three years, you wish she were standing right next to you.

–//–

Sleep puts some sense into your head. 

You were practically mortified with shame after thinking about the whole interaction with Wanda the night before, imagining that it now gave her enough power to somehow humiliate you and then hating that you thought that way of Wanda, who despite the rivalries, didn't seem the sort of person who would use a moment like that to mock you in the least.

So you had a foolproof plan the next morning: You would win fencing, and ask Wanda to stay away from you for the rest of the summer as your prize, succinctly hiding any unwanted feelings until it was time to leave Camp so that you would never have to see Wanda Maximoff again.

You think you were lucky this whole thing was happening in the last year.

The next day of competitions seemed to have been more aggressive than the previous one. To your complete happiness, the Avengers were irresponsible enough about the previous day's party to get careless.

The Skrull won the day's activities - Tight, you have to admit - but still champions. It wasn't all of them, unfortunately, but it would put both teams through to the final day of matches the next afternoon.

Fencing was one of the last competitions. 

You managed to avoid Wanda and her worried glances all morning, and consequently, your friends and sister, who noticed the lack of fighting between you. 

The fencing hall was considerably full when you arrived. Although most people didn't share much interest in the sport, everyone enjoyed watching you and Wanda compete. 

She was already in uniform when you arrived, and you ignored with a tightness in your chest her attempt to search in your face for any discomfort from the previous night. 

"You're late, Danvers." Professor Jacques Duquesne warned, also in uniform and with a sword at his waist. You sighed wearily, taking off your jacket to put on your uniform.

"Sorry, I... I didn't want to come." You muttered quietly, and the man frowned in confusion.

"What was that?" he asked without having heard, but you forced a smile.

"Nothing. Shall we get started?"

The spectators arranged themselves around you just as the teams were getting into position to compete. As Captains, you and Wanda were the last.

Your team won most of the duels, which on any other occasion would have cheered you up infinitely. But not today, because you spent most of the competition stealing glances at Wanda, who did the same, unsure of whether or not to approach you.

You had to face the champions of her team, as did Wanda with yours, and so when you finally went to face each other, you shared the slightly breathless but undefeated posture.

Wanda removed her protective helmet to drink water, and her slightly ruffled hair and rosy cheeks made your heart soar. 

Somehow, you decided that teasing her was a better idea than complimenting her on how pretty she looked.

"Hey Maximoff, did Daddy pay for private lessons for the rest of your team as well?"

Your team laughed at the joke, but Wanda finished a long sip of the water leisurely, staring at you long enough to make you feel completely clumsy.

As soon as she returned the bottle to the table, she stared at you again.

"Are you really going to pretend nothing happened yesterday, Danvers?" 

Everyone who was paying attention to the conversation whispered in curiosity, and your body froze. Wanda didn't seem to mind the audience one bit, but you huffed impatiently when Carol asked what she was talking about.

Without answering either of them, you turned your back and walked to the mat, waiting for the competition to begin.

As it turns out, teasing and ignoring Wanda seemed to have infuriated her. The hall filled with tension once the last duel began, and you, and all your confidence as an undefeated champion faltered when Wanda became a beast in the sport overnight.

She scored two points in a row, moving so quickly and masterfully that if you didn't have a reputation to uphold you would have congratulated her.

"It looks like we're going to have a new champion this year." Mr.Duquesne commented proudly and teasingly, receiving a chorus of soft celebration from the Avengers present.

You've had enough.

She tried hard to maintain a defensive position, but you scored within seconds of the announcement that the round had begun.

With the tip of the sword still on her chest, you teased:

"I guess we can't buy talent after all." 

Wanda grunted angrily, without waiting for the next round to be announced, spun the sword striking yours, and resumed the duel. You fought back every blow with the mastery of a champion, but Wanda didn't back down once.

"What's the matter, Maximoff, can't get me?" You sneered between one defense and another, irritating her even more. When it looked like she was going to hit you, you spun your body around and hit her in the arm.

The audience, completely tense, split between boos and cheers of celebration. The teacher laughed impressed.

"It's a draw." He said. "Girls, get back to-"

But Wanda attacked you - For a microsecond, you managed to react in time and prevent her from scoring.

She seemed a lot angrier all of a sudden, and you kept up the defense, waiting for a gap that apparently she wasn't going to provide.

Long steps backward to avoid the sword in your direction, in an albeit hurried, fully coordinated dance, Wanda managed to take the fight to the outside. 

The crowd got excited and drowned out Mr.Duquesne's protests about rules, the whole group following you and Wanda outside. Any campers who had previously been uninterested in watching the match took an immediate interest in the fight taking place, and it wasn't long before there was a large number of people in an open circle around the huts, trying to watch.

In one of the deflections, you had to do a somersault between two haystacks to dodge a blow that was impossible to block, stealing certain victory from the girl behind you, who grunted in annoyance.

In the motion, you knocked the helmet off your head.

"Going to play dirty then, Maximoff? Fine." You gasped equally affected at the girl who had paused her attacks. "It's our last year, let's make it count."

Wanda removed her helmet as well, her sword still raised for any attempted attacks. "I'm listening, Danvers." She returns between teeth, and you have to smile.

"I invoke a military challenge." You announce then, surprising her for only half a second. "No masks, no tips." You continue, the audience getting excited. "First one to draw blood wins. I might give you a nice scar to remind you who defeated you."

Some Skrulls laugh, but Wanda is not intimidated. She throws her helmet away and raises her chin in your direction. 

"What about our deal?"

You swallow dryly, but try to disguise it. "Still standing."

A glimmer of a smile forms on Wanda's lips, and she has the nobility to wait for you to nod before attacking next time.

It's suddenly much harder to fight Wanda. You blame these stupid feelings on your chest because once you realize that if you hit her, you're going to hurt her, you just can't do it.

Wanda doesn't seem to have much of a problem with that, because she attacks you with fervor. You think you might lose, because of the way she starts cornering you, and no chance for you to do another flip, so you despair. If you lose, you'll have to confess why you were crying, and that's unacceptable.

She throws a low, clean hit, but you jump. Before Wanda can get ready for the next one, you grab her waist and pull her to you.

The protest about the rules is muffled in your ears as your lips crash against hers. Wanda gasps, closing her eyes and dropping her sword to the ground at the same second the entire audience goes completely silent, shocked.

It's good, no, it's incredible. As breathtakingly overwhelming as you imagined kissing Wanda Maximoff would feel. She gasps against your lips, pressing back, and your chest screams. 

The audience vibrates and you wake up, realizing what you had just done.

You let go of Wanda with a long step away from her, who opens her eyes at the same moment, her breathing now affected for a completely different reason. She looks at you dumbfounded.

"W-what are you-" She tries as she steps forward, her hand raised towards your wrist, but you flinch. You raise your sword, and with one clean strike, hit her palm. 

The cut is small, but it makes her grunt in pain and surprise. You feel like you might start crying again, but you declare in a hoarse voice:

"I won."

Wanda's eyes fill with tears, but you assume they are tears of rage by the way she begins to shout angrily in the teacher's direction, saying that you had cheated while trying to be heard as the audience begins to shout your name and spread out in celebration.

Duquesne is equally in shock and mutters that technically there isn't a rule about kissing your opponent.

They lift you into the air, with the trophy, but when you capture Wanda's head-down posture and the completely hurt look she gives you before turning away, you don't feel like you've won anything.

–//–

With an injury, Wanda was out of all the upcoming competitions, which were sure to count in the Skrulls' favor.

Your school couldn't be happier, and you couldn't be more miserable.

Wanda was walking around the camp with her hand bandaged and you just wanted to get away from the people who kept congratulating you on the duel. 

There was also the matter of the angry stares from the other Avengers, especially your opponent's twin, which only made you feel like the worst person in the world.

When night came, and a few groups decided to set up card tables from poker to blackjack, you slipped outside to breathe properly.

The universe was surely testing you when you met Wanda across the door, and to add to your misfortune, she wasn't alone.

Some stupid guy was cornering her against the wall of one of the booths - clearly flirting by whispering things in her ear that made her giggle shyly.

With your jaw locked, you approached them in hard steps.

"Hey, Maximoff, I want to talk to you." You announced impatiently, feeling your chest burn with the scene in front of you.

She flinched at your sudden arrival, but the boy let out a short laugh.

"We're already in a conversation, cheater." He sneered, his hand on the wall coming down to Wanda's shoulders. "Why don't you go back to your cabin?"

"Listen here asshole-"

But Wanda sighed impatiently, pulling the boy's arm off her with a shove. "Fuck off you two, my day was bad enough to deal with this now."

She stormed off annoyed without caring, and you huffed impatiently. When the boy made mention of following her, you stepped in front of him, receiving a wry laugh.

"Back off, Danvers." He warned. "You may be a girl, but if you piss me off I'll break your face."

The kick to the ball made him bend his knees, grunting in pain. You didn't let him fall, holding him by the shoulders to mock against his ear:

"It's more the other way, don't you think?" He couldn't answer, still shaking from the blow. You pushed him away, and he fell to the ground, holding his front. "Stay away from her, she's mine."

Despite the pain, he gasped in confusion, "I thought you two hated each other, you maniac!"

Without bothering to respond, you headed off in the direction the girl had left.

Wanda was clearly not in the mood for conversation, but you had to chuckle as you realized where she was going - or practically running at hard paces. 

The fencing hall was empty of course. Even the Professor had joined the rest of the staff for the day's celebrations, and so you followed Wanda without any concern.

"I don't want to talk to you, Danvers." She warned between teeth still on her back, hearing your breaths panting from the rush of having to catch up with her. You chuckle humourlessly, closing the door behind you.

"But you got time for some idiot to flirt with you?" your retort came out so bitter - so jealous - that Wanda turned her face to you with a frown in complete confusion.

"How is that your problem?" She demanded but you shrugged relaxedly. The lack of an answer only irritated her more. "I've had enough of you for today don't you think? Leave me alone."

You snickered taking a step forward that made her lock her jaw.

"Come on, what's this?" You teased. "One defeat and you get tired of all? Don't you even want to try a rematch?"

It was Wanda's turn to chuckle, the tension growing between the two of you with every second. 

"So you can cheat again? Hard pass."

You smiled, raising your hands in the air as a sign of surrender. 

"I don't need to cheat, Maximoff." You retorted. "Everyone, including you and I, knows I'm the best." You declare receiving a snort and a roll of the eyes. But you continue to smile, not losing your confidence. "In fact, I bet I can beat you even without a sword."

Wanda shook her head. "You know what, Danvers? You must have had a few beers, huh?" She deduced, motioning to the sword cabinet and continuing to speak without giving you a chance to deny it. "Any other day, I'd tell you to fuck off and leave me alone. But you were a brat today, that whole scene and whatever manipulation you were trying to pull off with the crying and then the kissing..."

You hesitate, losing your posture completely. "Wanda, I wasn't-"

But she chuckles, interrupting you. "Whatever it is, let's put an end to it." She says seriously, arming herself with one of the swords. "You got what you wanted. Me, out of all competitions because of this stupid injury and your team winning tomorrow. Yep, I admit it. Everyone knows you guys are going to win baseball, it's your school's specialty, and there's no reason to deny it. But let's be honest about today: you cheated. And I want you to acknowledge that I would have won."

You sigh, deciding to put an end to those games with each other, as Wanda wanted. But not in the way she expects.

Shrugging, you gesture with open arms. "I'm really sorry, Wanda." You say in a false tone of regret. "I'm sorry you're such a bad loser."

Wanda grunted in irritation, and in the blink of an eye, spun the sword around - Hitting your open hand and mirroring your bruises. You gasped in pain, taking a step backward.

"What the hell-"

But your shock was short-lived, Wanda moved and you reacted. Without a sword, your only option was to dodge and that was the hardest task. 

"Just admit it, Danvers!" Wanda demanded between one blow and another, growing breathless as the movements went on. "I am. Better.Than. You." Each word was punctuated with an attempt to hit you - Not really to hurt but to lean in and mark. 

She finally hit you for the second time when she trapped you between one cupboard and another. You protested in irritation at the gentle burning on your thigh.

"You little shit." You cursed low as you dodged her last. Wanda smiled in satisfaction. 

Somehow, you managed to get around her after a miscalculated blow that pinned her sword to a cushion. Wanda got busy trying to pull the item out and gave you enough time to jump on her.

Her healthy hand tried to pull the sword out to hit you but you kicked the handle, and the item flew to the ground. Wanda protested breathlessly, trying to struggle away, but you pressed her against the wall of the room by the waist.

Faces flushed from the exertion and proximity, she looked at you with a fury in her eyes that didn't just look like anger.

"Fuck off, Danvers, let me go!" She demanded clearly affected, her fists closed against your shoulders. You weren't thinking straight - Since when did Wanda look so beautiful when she was pissed off? - She tried to throw punches but you grabbed her fists, holding them tightly against you. "You just can't help it, can you? You know you can't beat me and you just keep cheating!"

"Yeah, I can't help it." You pant, letting your gaze fall to her mouth. Her breathing hitches and when you start to lean in, Wanda gasps, stopping struggling.

"Don't." She asks in a whisper, and you stop leaning in the same instant, worried eyes scanning her face. Wanda's fill with tears. "I can't take it... if it's just a game... if you don't mean it."

Your heart races in your chest, threads of hope burning outwards.

You stare into her eyes, trying to read everything she hasn't explained. "You... You want me to mean it?"

Wanda sighs incredulously, tired. 

"I've been waiting for you to notice me for three years, Danvers." 

"W-what?"

Wanda looks away, despite her rosy cheeks like your own, she looks sad.

"I'm just tired of all this cat and mouse between us." She continues. "Trying to capture your attention for the few days we have together each year. You've never seen me that way, and I just don't have it in me to keep trying to get you to notice me." She declares with a sigh. "Let me go, okay? It's our last year, you'll never see me again after this spring, it doesn't have to be weird on our last days. We can do a truce, and be mature about-"

Instead of letting her finish her completely meaningless monologue for feelings that Wanda has no idea are much reciprocated, you just kiss her. Though abrupt, your lips are soft on hers. She shudders, first surprised and then affected, ready to reciprocate when you loosen her.

"I notice you, Wanda." You confess in a husky voice and short breath. "Every damn day of this camp, from the first moment I saw you. I noticed you, and I liked you. So much, it infuriated me. All I could think about was you and your face and your jokes and every little smile of victory. I never hated you, Wanda, I just hated how much I cared about you."

She gasps softly, trying to believe the confessions. "B-but you never said anything..."

"Neither did you." You retort with a small smile. "We just competed. Yelling at each other, trying to... just put it out, never saying the right words. Well, I'll do the honors, I guess. Wanda, I like you. I'm in love with you. The whole puppy love, to the moon and back, lovey-dovey, carry a torch for-"

Wanda interrupts your sweet teasing with a soft, emotional giggle. "Shut up, you idiot." She says, pulling you by the collar of the blouse to kiss you again. Slower than the other time, bringing delicious shivers to your entire body. She breaks away only to say she feels the same way.

Then you just kiss her again, just to make sure. It's easy to get addicted to the feeling of her lips on yours until her tongue slides over and starts to get too hot all around. The sound of lips slapping together mingles with affected gasps until the pace picks up and all the accumulated lust from so long of rivalry burns between you.

Wanda grows impatient - Her mouth firmly pressed to yours distracts you from where her hands are moving. You grunt affected as she scratches under your shirt, your back, and your torso, trying to pull you over her. 

You press your hips together to keep her against the wall pulling out an affected whimper that makes you shiver - But surrendered to the urge, you forget about recent events and press your open palm to the wall for support. The pain is immediate and makes you break the kiss with a yelp.

Wanda opens her eyes worriedly, trying to push all the arousal away. "What's wrong?" She asks, but you're already bringing your bruised hand to chest height.

"I forgot about it." You mumble, trying to squeeze your hand to make the pain go away. Wanda bites back a smile.

"Karma's a bitch, huh?" she teases, getting a short laugh out of you. Your instinct is to kiss her again at the same intensity as before, but Wanda doesn't let you, breaking the session the next moment. "Easy tiger." 

A little breathless and definitely missing kissing her, you ask, "Don't you want it anymore?"

She licks her lips, looking away to try and gain some rationality again. "I don't think you'll be able to do much with a bruised hand, huh?" It's clearly a joke, but you're too turned on to catch it.

"Well, I have another one, and my mouth..." Wanda stares at you in stunned shock, her face burning and her eyes darkening a little. You grunt in shame, hiding your face in her collarbone. "Shit, you didn't mean it."

She giggles awkwardly, wrapping her arms around your waist. "You need a bandage, baby. We'll have time for this later."

You raise your gaze to her again, and Wanda stares at you doubtfully from your expression. "I like it when you call me that."

She smiles, teasing and loving at the same time. "Better than shithead, I suppose."

"They both have their charm, I guess." You joke back managing to make her laugh before stealing a few more kisses.

All the way to the infirmary, all you can think about is how happy you are - And how your friends are going to adjust to the new dynamic.

–//–

Falling into a routine with Wanda was as easy as falling for her.

The familiar teasing didn't end - In a way, it got infinitely better, because, after each little bickering, you and Wanda made up with lots of kisses.

The most absurd thing was your sister's reaction. No surprise at all.

"I mean, everyone saw you two kissing." She retorted unimpressed, continuing to eat her breakfast as if you hadn't spent the previous day preparing the best way to tell. You huffed indignantly, but Wanda sighed, giving you a pat on the back before going to sit down. The same reaction for your friends, who seemed even somewhat reassured that now they wouldn't have to endure the arguing.

As for the rest of the people, well, everyone else had their own lives to take care of to give a damn about what Wanda and you have been up to.

With the baseball game approaching and the end of Spring Break, there was an understanding between you and Wanda that your time together was coming to an end. You didn't want to talk about it - to avoid creating impossible expectations if you considered the distance between California and New York and the hurt of an inevitable goodbye. 

For now, you and Wanda were enjoying as much time together as possible, and that included escaping the game to make out before and between breaks.

Wanda giggled affectedly at the tickling your fingers did next to her hips, an attempt to make her relax to what was about to happen between you since the first kisses began. The question hung in the air and the way your breaths were uncompressed and your clothes crumpled.

"They'll start looking for us at some point..." Wanda recalled, the noise of the game resuming in the background, muffled by the closed doors of the empty locker room where you two were hiding. Despite the warning, her hands were entwined behind your neck, and her legs tight around your waist. The cheer skirt pulled up by your hands on her thighs.

You hum in understanding, distracted by the soft skin of her collarbone. You traced a path down to the valley of her covered breasts and Wanda shuddered, moaning in anticipation.

But as soon as your hands reached under her skirt, fingers playing with the fabric of her panties, Wanda tensed anxiously, biting her lips as she sought your gaze. 

"Is everything okay?" You asked immediately, stopping your movements and staring back at her. "Do you want me to continue...?"

Wanda let out a broken breath, the look full of anxiety made you frown. You were ready to assure her it was okay if she refused when she replied:

"I want to but... I've never done it before." She confesses in a small whisper, and your heart skips a beat. "And also, I had to talk to my friends about this, and they told me it would be special because we like each other but I just kept thinking that it's going to happen and it will be amazing and when you leave, I'll never be able to do it again without remembering you and I'll be missing you back home..."

"Hey, breathe." You interrupted her anxious babbling with a small chuckle, moving your hands to her face, and squeezing her cheeks for a moment. "God, you're so beautiful." You murmured staring at her adoringly. Wanda blushed, looking away, "Hey, look at me, sweetheart. You want to talk about leaving?"

She swallowed dryly, nodding. "I'm sorry." She mumbles immediately. "I know we kind of agreed not to talk about it, but... fuck, I really like you. If I, you know... have sex with you, I'm just sure I'll fall harder. And I don't know if I want to go through the pain of losing you in a few days."

You swallowed dryly, caressing her cheeks as you absorbed her words. Wanda was even more nervous at your silence.

"Say something, please."

You smiled, staring at her. "I'm sorry, I just... I really am in love with you, Wanda." You confessed tenderly, making her blush. "Sex or no sex, I really am. And saying goodbye to you will hurt." 

Wanda nods sadly before hugging you. "Yeah, I know." When she sniffles softly, you kiss her neck to calm her, until her breathing stabilizes again and Wanda releases you to kiss you gently, once and twice, until it starts to get hot again and she sighs against your lips, her trembling fingers groping your body unhurriedly as if she wants to memorize.

"Baby..." She called softly against your lips, her hands moving up into your blouse and making you shudder. "I want to make love to you." She whispered taking all the air out of your lungs. "Give me something to remember you by."

Despite the nervousness and excitement, you managed to tease as your hands retraced their way under her skirt. "What, the matching scars aren't enough for you, darling?" 

Wanda lets out an affected giggle at the proximity to your joke about the healed bruises on your hands, but the sound turns to a deep sigh when her panties slip down her legs. You maintain eye contact with her, pulling the item down until you take it off by her ankles. Wanda bites her lip hard as she sees you on your knees, moving up your way again with kisses on her legs.

Her muscles quiver as you kiss the inside of her thighs, and Wanda inhales a shaky breath, her hands gripping the table she's sitting on tightly.

"Be gentle." She asks as she feels the kisses coming closer to where she is burning. You let out a soft laugh, rising again to kiss her on the mouth. Wanda has no time to be eager for the delay of her relief, because you grab her waist and pull her closer, the friction between your hips making her whimper. 

Your tongue slides over hers hungrily, kissing her until she's dizzy with arousal, and instinctively starts forcing her hips against yours - The uncovered intimacy smearing the wetness on the fabric of your leg and making you moan against her.

One of your hands spreads her legs open by her thigh, fingers coming up fast to tease her entrance and make Wanda break the kiss with an affected whimper.

"Y-yes, baby, please, no more teasing." Wanda moans, throwing her hips against your hand. "I'm ready."

You grunt softly, tentatively cupping the folds between your fingers, spreading the wetness over the entire length. "Hmm, I can feel that." You teased softly, pulling your hand away to get a taste. Wanda choked, blushing heavily as she watched you suck your fingers one by one, rolling her eyes in pleasure as you tasted her. The next second, you moved your hand back between her legs, staring her in the eye before sliding a finger inside. She moaned at the intrusion, and you let her get used to it, encouraging her with your free hand on her back, relaxing her with a gentle massage.

"There you go... all the way in." You narrated softly, having to maintain all mental control not to fuck her roughly, feeling your body vibrate with the sensation of Wanda's soft wet walls on your fingerprints. She pulsed against you, her hands gripping your blouse tightly as the repetitive motion made her legs twitch. "God, you're so tight." You grunted, hiding your face in her collarbone and angling your palm to press against her clit as well. Wanda let out a loud yelp, wrapping one of her legs around your waist and increasing your reach.

"M-more, please-I just need-" She tried to formulate, starting to follow your movements with her hips. You shushed her against her neck, kissing your way to her ear. 

"Relax, I'll give you what you need, baby." Was your only warning before removing yourself from her, only to sink two fingers inside next time. Wanda gasped at the intrusion, but you swallowed her moan with your own mouth, not moving inside her until she was ready.

Soon, your movements had resumed, and with your mouth glued to hers, you swallowed each breathless moan as Wanda began to tremble in your fingers, squeezing as her orgasm built. 

Just as she was panting and restless, the locker room door opened. She raised desperate eyes to you, but you covered her mouth with your free hand and sped up your movements.

Your skin muffled her whimpers, and you bit your lips at the sinful image in front of you.

"Danvers? Maximoff? Are you guys here? The coach is looking for two." it was some of the monitors, probably checking the camp behind whoever was running away from the game. You reached a deep sweet spot inside Wanda and she threw her head back.

The monitor grumbled in frustration and the door closed again - You barely noticed, bringing the girl beneath you to her climax. Wanda spread herself in your hand, her body spasming against you and a long muffled moan against your hand.

Her pupils were so dark they nearly hold any green.

"Fucking gorgeous." You praised as you removed your hand to kiss her, and Wanda corresponded with difficulty, smiling breathlessly as she tried to recover from the intensity of her first orgasm.

As soon as she could properly match it, Wanda dominated the kiss - One hand moving up to the back of your neck, to tug at your hair as she bit your bottom lip, drawing a soft moan from you.

"Please, can we go back to the cabin?" It sounded like a request but felt like an order by the way Wanda dug her nails into your waist. A warning. "I want you to be comfortable when you go down on me."

"God, Wanda, you're such a tease." You grumbled in a mixture of arousal and embarrassment, moving like an obedient puppy as she stood up on shaky legs and guided you by the hand back to the cabins. 

Her panties are tucked tightly in your pocket.

–//–

Disgustingly adorable, is how your friends would describe the last few days in the company of you and Wanda, who have apparently unlearned how to function away from each other.

Especially the last day - Without any concern for the rest of the world while in an intense make-out session against the bus that was supposed to take you and Carol back to California.

"Jesus, I'm going to have nightmares." Your sister complained with a grimace to her now official girlfriend - Natasha Romanoff - who was putting away the last bag in the family car that was going to take her home. The redhead laughed, looking at where Carol was staring and knowing she was referring to your hand firmly squeezing Wanda's ass as she giggled between the kisses you two shared. 

"Why are they behaving like they're never going to see each other again? It's traumatizing." It wasn't Nat, but Bucky who spoke as he arrived with Sam beside him, who laughed in agreement. Carol made a mischievous face.

"Well, maybe that's my fault? I may have forgotten to mention to my lovely sister that Nat told me that Wanda was going to the same college as her next year."

"Pretty mean, Danvers." Nat commented with a certain pride in her voice. Carol laughed.

"When you share a room with a couple in love, you'll understand." She retorted. The group continued to watch you and Wanda, until you kissed deeply in farewell until she let you on the bus. Carol sighed. "Maybe if she starts whining on the way, I'll consider saying that she and Wanda chose the same college without even knowing it."

The group chuckled, saying goodbye one last time.

[rafeverse]

your daddy's got a gun

CW: mentions of a gun, overprotective dad!rafe

AN: this was the first rafe fic i wrote after not writing anything for 2 years and i fucking hate it LMAO but since it was the birth of the dad!rafe au, I'm not going to delete it

the day rafe had been dreading for months now had finally come. mia, your 17 year old daughter, was going to her junior prom. her first high school dance.

when mia was an underclassmen, she’d had countless junior and senior boys try to take her to the prom, but her dad shut all of that down, much to his daughter’s dismay. he had insisted she was too young and could go once she was old enough. he turned a deaf ear to all of her begging and pleading.

now, however, she was old enough to attend and quickly let him know that she was going whether he liked it or not. when he tried to shut her down, y/n would come to her defense and remind him that he “said she could go when she reached 11th grade!”

so there he sat, scrolling on his phone, on the soft, expensive, white sectional he and his wife had picked out when they first moved into their extravagant home (nothing could be simple with rafe). he decided to let you take mia around town to her hair and makeup appointments, while he sat at home and made a few phone calls and finished some paperwork.

he smiled when the door opened and he heard the most beautiful sound in the world- the sound of his girls laughing and talking.

y/n quickly ‘shushed’ mia and told her to wait as she ran ahead of her into the living room where she knew rafe would be.

“hey baby.” he greeted his wife.

“hello, my love.” y/n smiled.

“where’s my other girl?” rafe tried looking around his wife for his precious daughter, but couldn’t see her.

“hmm, are you sure you’re ready to see her, rafe? you might need to sit down.” y/n said loudly, causing their daughter to giggle.

“positive.”

“okay, sit down and close your eyes!!” once rafe was seated, y/n signaled for their daughter to come into the room.

“okay dad, you can open your eyes.” rafe quickly opened his eyes and gasped when he saw her. she wore a beautiful, long, pink dress and her hair had been curled. he couldn’t believe his eyes. his baby girl. his daughter was old enough to go to the prom.

“sweetheart, you look so beautiful.” rafe engulfed the girl into a bear hug, only pulling away when she pushed him off of her in fear that he would ruin her makeup or wrinkle her dress.

“thank you, dad.” she smiled back at him. y/n couldn’t help but notice how much the young girl favored her father. they had the same smile, eyes, and nose.

the sweet moment was interrupted by an alarm going off, telling y/n that they had to get mia to the spot where she’d be taking her pictures.

“oh! guys! come on, we need to get downtown so we can get your pictures done, mia! will you text jack and let him know we’re leaving the house now?” y/n scrambled to get everything she needed from the house before they took off again.

while she was scrambling, rafe was still. jack? who the fuck is jack? he stood, racking his brain for any recollection of this jack.

y/n noticed his stillness and his stare, and immediately knew what was on his mind.

“rafe, they’ve gone to school together forever. you know him. he’s alyssa and thomas’ son, remember? from the country club? i think he’s actually a waiter there. anyways, come on or we’ll be late.” y/n quickly explained as she walked towards the door.

however, this still didn’t really make rafe feel any better. for a moment, he felt himself seep back into his old ways, getting a bit angry that his wife would just let mia go to the dance with someone he barely even knew.

“yeah, babe, i’m coming. just let me grab my jacket.” rafe walked quickly to their shared bedroom and, when he was sure his wife was out of the house, he opened up his safe and pulled out his trusty 9MM. he put the gun in his waistband and threw his jacket on. he didn’t know this jack, and he wanted to be prepared in case the boy tried anything. plus, he could easily flash it if he felt jack getting too cocky.

mia: DAD!!!

mia: COME ON!!!

mia: WHAT ARE YOU DOINGGG

he was pulled out of his thoughts by his dinging phone. he rolled his eyes at the texts and put his phone back in his pocket before heading out the door.

-

when they arrived at the spot for pictures, jack and his family were already there waiting. jack walked up to the truck as rafe was putting it in park. he opened the door for mia and helped her out of the tall vehicle.

“wow, you look…you look beautiful, mia.” jack stammered and mia blushed. rafe rolled his eyes at the interaction and y/n noticed, slapping him on the arm and warning him to “be nice.”

when jack was sure mia was good to go, he went to open the door for y/n, only to be met by a larger, stronger rafe cameron.

“nope, i’ve got it, bud.” now it was time for y/n and mia to roll their eyes.

“dad,” mia groaned as she crossed her arms over her chest.

rafe opened the door and helped his wife out of the truck. as they walked to the photographer and jack’s family, rafe pulled jack back so the two could walk a bit behind the girls and talk.

“listen, jack. i don’t know what your intentions are for my daughter and honestly, i really don’t give a fuck. what i do know, is that if you even so much as think about laying a finger on her, it will be the last thing you ever do.” rafe paused and lifted up his shirt a bit, revealing the handle of the gun that was tucked away in his waistband. “are we clear?”

jack swallowed thickly and let out a shaky “y-yes sir.” rafe patted him on the back, smirking as he went to catch up with his wife.

-

“come on, you two! get closer together.” the photographer called out to the couple.

“yeah jack, you’re acting like you barely even know mia! scooch closer to her, son! put your arm around her waist.” jack’s mom directed her son.

jack froze as he made eye contact with mia’s father. rafe stood beside his wife and stared at the boy, coldly, tapping his finger on the grip of the pistol that only he and jack knew was there.

“i-i-um. yeah, okay.” jack shook his head and carefully moved maybe a millimeter closer to mia. when they wrapped up pictures, mia pulled jack aside as their parents were conversing with the photographer.

“dude, what the hell is going on with you? you’re acting so weird.” mia questioned jack as she had picked up on his odd behavior.

when he looked up, he immediately made eye contact with rafe. “it’s-uh-it’s nothing. i guess i’m just a bit nervous because you look so pretty.” jack gulped and mia rolled her eyes.

“jack, seriously, what’s really wrong?” mia huffed.

“um,” he knew he couldn’t win against her, she’d just keep pressing the issue until she got the answer she wanted. (her mother would tell her she was just like her father when she did this.) “mia, your, um, your daddy’s gotagun.” he said the last few words so quickly and quietly that she barely even heard him.

“my dad what?”

“your daddy’s got a gun.”

mia’s eyes widened before an annoyed look covered her face as she let out a groan. she turned to look at her father, who was already looking at her, smirking proudly.

[1lostsoul0fishbowl]

20 questions for fic writers

I was tagged by @sevenmerrymagpies for this, thank you so much darlin! 🥰🥰🥰

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 18 (one of them is just links to artwork though)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 417,209… that’s the equivalent of almost six novels. Damn, I wrote six novels in just over two years!!!

3. What fandoms do you write for? Right now just Stranger Things

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

With a Little Help From My Friends ❤️ Why Should I Cry For You ❤️ Not-so-iron Maiden ❤️ Tattoos and Trash Talk ❤️ Next Time I Fall

5. Do you respond to comments? Yes, even if it’s just a short “thank you!!!” because I appreciate every single comment so much.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I think it’s Into the Shining Sun, but even then it’s a hopeful ending too.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Anyone who knows me knows I ADORE happy endings for all the characters! But Little Help ends with Eddie and Chrissy’s wedding, and Next Time ends with El and Gareth at her senior prom making plans for their future together, so those two are probably the very happiest.

8. Do you get hate on fics? Thankfully no— if anyone hates me/my fics they’re keeping it to themselves. I don’t actually know how I’d handle it. Probably not well!

9. Do you write smut? Nope. I don’t know how. I can barely write the word ‘tongue’ without cringing. Lmao

10. Do you write crossovers? No, but if I could think of a good one I wouldn’t mind trying!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? No, thankfully.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? No, but if anybody ever wanted to they’d be welcome, all they have to do is ask.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Not yet, but Pearly and I have big plans!

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? The only one that has endured the test of time— Mulder and Scully.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I only have one WIP right now and even though I’m taking a hiatus from it, I do hope to still finish it sometime.

16. What are your writing strengths? I’m not sure, I don’t feel too great about my writing lately (hence the wip on hiatus). I’ll let my dear friend and favorite commenter Rich speak for me— “You have written a world that I really want to live in and populated it with characters that I really want to meet and be friends with.”

17. What are your writing weaknesses? (I’m trying to be realistic and not unnecessarily self-loathing here.) My weaknesses are: not creating strong beginnings and endings, adding too much dialogue, adding too much description to the point of infodumping, unable to write smut, and lately, recycling plots. Sigh.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I’ve tried it, sprinkling little bits of Welsh into Gareth and my imaginary Emerson family, and it’s not as simple as just plugging things into google translate. I don’t think I’d be willing to do more than an occasional word or phrase here and there. Although cariad as a pet name is a permanent part of my lexicon now.

19. First fandom you wrote for? NSYNC. I don’t want to talk about it.

20. Favorite fics you’ve written? Not-so-iron Maiden and Tattoos and Trash Talk will always be two of my favorites, Gone Away because I love uncle Wayne so much, and of course Next Time I Fall which despite its rushed ending is still the work I’m proudest of.

✍️📖📝📚☕️

No-pressure tags: @pearlypairings @justhere4thevibez @smokefurball

@hellcheercaine @chornayadrakoshig @the-unforgivenn @hellishchrissy

@gingertumericlemon @uwusillygirl @erythromanc3r @krakoansam

[flooffybits]

What The Heart Wants

Idol: Wong Kahei (Loona)

marshmallow: So again hi, I here scenario coined, so 13 member in the first time fell in love with girl, and she fell in love with Vivi, and it account for contain emotions under itself, because she fears that its love not will accept, so she writes all their feelings in diary, and also she wrote letter for senior. And once s/o is a little late due to schedules, and her diary read, Junior, and then 12 girls were waiting for s/o to talk to her and then when she came the girls told her that love is normal and accepted it, and then all flushed s/o and Vivi well understood in senses (I'm sorry, but then my imagination flew away). The fluffy end. P. s There are no scenarios for Loona where there is a love line with Vivi, and if there are then there are few of them.

Word count: 2.7k

A/N: What’s up guys??? i know it’s been a long long  while and it might take me another century before i finish something but i hope you enjoy this little Vivi fic. i had to change a few things but i hope the mallow who requested this likes it 🥲

☕buy me a coffee☕

“Is there something on my face?” You blink a little when a sudden voice penetrates through your thoughts and you find yourself face to face with the eldest member of your group. Her gentle eyes have a hint of curiosity and mirth within them as she awaited your answer and you felt heat rise to your cheeks when you realized that you had been caught staring again.

“I, uh, sorry, I was just lost in thought.” You try to say, mentally cursing yourself for stuttering, but she only giggles before ruffling your hair. “You’re so cute, Y/n.” The compliment makes your face burn brighter and you duck just to hide the now very obvious blush as you muttered a thank you.

You can’t find yourself to say anything more after that, and you’re just relieved that Kahei doesn’t find the silence awkward when she rests her head against your shoulder. She’s always had a calming aura around her.

Which was what made you fall for her in the first place.

You knew that you were screwed the moment you realized that what you felt for her had surpassed the same friendly emotions you felt for the rest of your members. There was just something about her that just enraptured you and you would constantly find yourself on your toes just to keep up with everything she did and said.

You were in deep.

But instead of talking about your feelings to anyone else, you resorted to writing it all down, too embarrassed to let your feelings be known. Since you weren't exactly out, or sure about your sexuality to begin with, you opted to write every thought into your trusty notebook just to relieve the little bit of panic you felt when you realized your attraction towards the eldest.

All those feelings, all that confusion, every little detail was put away in a little notebook that you made sure to keep out of the curious eyes of your members. At first, you'd opted to write in your own mother tongue, for extra precautions in the event they do catch a glimpse.

But after a while, you'd gotten more and more comfortable with the Korean language and you ended up writing it halfway.

It was tiring having to keep it a secret, and it was even more exhausting when you realized that maybe you weren't straight. You had to be careful with the things you said and did, still finding it hard to pluck the courage to tell at least one of your members since Korea wasn't exactly a very welcoming place.

Over the years, you managed to hide your affections for the eldest, admiring her from a distance and even convincing yourself that you'd gotten over that silly little crush, even going out on a few dates with a few other idols you'd gotten to know throughout your career. But after everything, your eyes would still search for her.

Your heart still longed for her.

..

Putting your pen down, you stare at the latest entry to your worn out notebook, humming as your fingers gently traced over the pages.

It's been a while, but writing again ended up spurring new and old feelings in your chest. The nostalgia made your lips quirk up a little before letting out a breath and stretching your limbs. The satisfying pop brought out another sigh from your lips before you checked the time.

"I wonder what the others are up to…" You mumbled to yourself, rising to your feet to head out, making sure to put your notebook away in the corner of your table.

The girls have learned to respect your privacy so you're confident that no one would come snooping in here to see. And even if they did, you doubted that anyone would be able to understand a single thing, considering that the majority of your entries were written in your own mother tongue.

You did pick up after Kahei though and opted to write your members' names in Korean, for extra measures.

The memory made a smile effectively creep up your lips when you remember Jungeun whining when she managed to see her name mixed in with unfamiliar words. She didn't stop bugging you for minutes until someone else managed to steal her attention away, but she did bring it back up when the two of you were on a live together, telling Orbits that you were probably saying something to tease her, which you only laughed at before assuring her that it was all good.

Hyunjin had seen her name at one point, too, and her brows pinched together before she was calmly asking you about what you'd written about her. When you refused to budge, then she began to act and you found yourself trapped between her and the cold floor, whining and trying to escape her onslaught of tickles as you gasped for air.

And it was just a domino effect from there.

At some point, you would share with the girls what was written in some of the pages, but they noticed how you would skip others. They've learned not to push after you and Yeojin almost had an argument about it. Luckily, Haseul was able to intervene along with the others before it got too bad.

"Boo!"

Flinching, you stopped in your tracks as Sooyoung popped up from the corner, smirking when she sees the look on your face before she's full on laughing, Hyeju recording the whole thing from behind with a giggle of her own. "Not cool!" You whined out, pushing the taller girl a little as you walked by to reach the kitchen and Hyeju ended the recording as the pair followed you in.

"It was pretty funny, unnie." The wolf claimed and you shot her an unimpressed look. "You, siding with Yves unnie? Now that's something." You joke, making the older girl playfully scoff. "Oh, please, she does everything I tell her to." Sooyoung sassed with a flip of her hair, causing the younger girl to scrunch her nose up.

When she wasn't looking, Sooyoung failed to see Hyeju sticking her foot out in front of her, catching the yyxy leader and causing her to trip, earning another set of laughter from you and Hyeju.

"Yah!"

"What's going on here?" A calm voice mused and you damn near shut up when your eyes landed on Kahei smiling at the three of you. "Hyeju tripped Yves unnie." You answered and the younger girl pouted at you. "Why are you snitching?" She complained and Kahei only giggles at your antics before patting your head. "Just try not to get yourself hurt."

For some reason, your face flushes at the affection from the eldest and the pair are quick to notice, silently giggling at your display.

Once Kahei has exited the kitchen, Hyeju speaks first. "So… when do you plan on telling Vivi unnie that you like her?" You nearly trip over yourself, the red becoming more noticeable this time as you spun around to look at the pair who were already staring at you.

"I don't!" You say a little too quickly, voice raising an octave and Sooyoung mock sighs while shaking her head. "Oh, Y/n, you have to be more honest with your feelings or else you're not getting any girls." She stated like it's the most normal thing in the world.

"Who told you I liked girls?" You retort and the pair both give you a knowing look. "Unnie, you're not that good at hiding." Hyeju tells you while taking a seat. "Maybe you're a little more subtle after being around everyone, but we can still tell. Even Lip unnie is tearing her hair out whenever she has to see you become a mess just so you can talk to Vivi unnie."

Now you're sure you're as red as a tomato. Even Jungeun could tell? Were you seriously that obvious?

"Don't worry, Vivi unnie doesn't know, and neither do Yeojin and Haseul, though she does have a bit of a hunch." Sooyoung informs you, quickly squashing down your hopes of possibly redeeming yourself from this embarrassing situation. “Oh, don't worry so much. All you have to do is confess your undying love-"

“Who said I was confessing anything?" You ask with wide eyes and Sooyoung cocks her head in confusion, almost as though she thought you were on the same page. “I thought you wanted a way to tell Vivi unnie how you feel about her?"

You said nothing of the sort and Hyeju just busts out laughing when she sees the incredulous look on your face.

“Are you out of your mind, unnie? I'm not doing that!"

Due to your increased volume, it's not long before Hyunjin hears the commotion and walks in, puzzled as she does.

“What are you being forced into doing?" The cat questioned and you spun around, letting her see your face which was a deep shade of red. “Nothing! I'm going out!"

You don't even wait, just rush out of the room before you're cornered and Hyunjin’s confusion only amplified before turning to the pair.

“What was…”

"Don't worry about it, unnie. She's just stressed." Hyeju promises, sensing that you needed the space, but Sooyoung only frowned in response. “It's gonna keep stressing her if she doesn't say anything soon."

Hyunjin blinks before she's quick to piece things together. “You mean Vivi unnie?"

Yeah, you weren't obvious at all.

..

“Vivi unnie can you please help me?" Jiwoo asked when she saw the older girl. “I think I left my notebook in our room after I finished writing. Can you please get it for me?” Seeing that her arms were full, Kahei was quick to agree, smiling gently at the younger girl. "Sure thing. Give me a moment.”

Upon entering your shared bedroom, Kahei was quick to search for the said notebook, humming when she checked the desk and smiling as soon as she saw the opened notebook.

However as soon as she picked it up, the eldest of the group blinked at the words written on the pages before quickly realizing that this was not Jiwoo’s notebook.

She recognized your handwriting right away and when she looked at the words spilled on the pages, she was quick to shut the notebook and then looked around.

When she sees the notebook with a penguin sticker and various doodles on it, she immediately picks it up and hurries out of the room. Kahei doesn't say anything when she gives Jiwoo the notebook, just hops into the van and looks around.

Her eyes are quick to land on the other van parked outside and she realizes that you're not riding the same van that she was in. It's likely due to how she took a while to get to the parking lot because usually you would be seated somewhere near her if you could.

So when you all arrive at the company for your scheduled practice, you can feel eyes on you as you converse with some of your members. When you attempted to look, Yeojin whined about you not paying attention to what she was demonstrating, causing you to quickly turn back to her and apologize.

“Sorry, kiddo, I'm paying attention now. I swear." You tell her and Haseul chuckles while the maknae puffs her cheeks out, earning a poke on the cheek from Jinsol before a new voice cuts in.

"Can we talk?"

Your head turns and a smile is quick to form on your features when you spot Kahei standing there. However upon seeing the conflicted look on her face, your smile was quick to fade away.

“Is everything alright, unnie?"

But instead of a verbal response, the older woman presents you with an all too familiar notebook, catching you off guard as you carefully took it from her grasp. “Where did you-" But she cuts you off before you can even ask, fear settling in your stomach as she speaks.

"You… " She looks slowly among the members currently present before she's gently taking your hand and leading you to a more secluded area in the room, earning confused looks among yours members. Though Heejin does throw you an encouraging things up whilst Yerim gives you a wave.

Once you're both alone, you're becoming antsier with each second. You're only assuring yourself that you're alright because there was just no way that Kahei would understand a word you'd written aside from her and the others’ names.

“Is there… something you aren't telling me?” Okay, so you could still play this out. "Did you see your name on here again, unnie?” You nearly cringe with how you force a chuckle out but Kahei doesn't budge except for a nod of her head. "I did… and I was able to read some of the other things written about me."

Your smile faltered and your fear was steadily growing. She's joking. She had to be.

“Okay, so maybe I wrote about how much I appreciate you a lot, but there's really nothing wrong with-"

"... I've been doing some studying, Y/n. I understand what's written on it.”

Your stomach dropped and your face grew pale at her proclamation.

Seeing how you've lost your voice, the eldest only frowns before letting out a sigh. "Hey, talk to me." Kahei had zero intentions of harming you. She just wanted confirmation for what she's read. It was impossible for her to just keep her mouth shut. Not when she's seen something so personal.

“I…” Chewing on your bottom lip, you can feel yourself start to tremble because there was just no way you could come out and tell her just how you actually felt about her. Not like you could do much now that she's read basically the depths of your heart with just one accident.

“I'm sorry." You croak out and Kahei is quick to wrap you in her arms when she sees the tears threatening to come spilling from your eyes. “I don't… I tried to brush them off, I swear, but they just wouldn't go away. I didn't want you to hate me so I wrote all my feelings down just so I wouldn't end up exploding.”

The latter only rubs your back as you sob into her shoulder, listening to every word even when some might now be too comprehensive for her as you continue to pour your poor heart out.

"I could never hate you.” She whispers once you've calmed down, but she makes no move to separate from you. "There's nothing wrong for feeling the way that you do, so never feel sorry about it.” She assures you before slowly pulling away but keeping you within arms reach.

Her eyes meet yours and she gives you the same warm smile that she always does. The same smile that's made you fall for her in the first place.

“Do you wanna know why I studied speaking and reading your mother tongue?" Shaking your head, she only smiles more before cupping your face, wiping your tears away as she studies your features. “It's because I like you and I wanted to impress you for when I could tell you that in your own language." She explains softly as your breath hitches. “But then I read your little letter and I realized that neither of us would be ready unless one of us actually did something instead of continue to let doubt control us."

All this time you'd been hiding, but Kahei had already been looking for a way to find you. You felt utterly embarrassed at the fact, but she's quick to throw all your worries away when she places a gentle kiss to your forehead.

“Don't ever be afraid to come to me, okay?"

“I won't." You finally manage to say, finally calming down from your crying and gripping at Kahei’s shirt.

There really was nothing for you to be afraid of. Your members made sure of it when they found out. Kahei made sure of it as she held your hand through it all.

You could love who you wanted to love.

And you loved all of her while she did the same with you.

[musewritingsforyou]

A Normal? Day

Summary: A normal day in the life of Beacon Hills Favorite Couple

Warnings: unbearable Fluff, plot points that wont make sense just yet

Word Count: 1.6k

A/N: I realized I dont have any of my Stiles work updated yet! This is just a short little oneshot to show people what my stiles writing will kind of be like. I wrote it to be included in a season rewrite that I am doing but It didnt fit great so now im just giving it to you for fun!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*somethings that wont make sense to you will be explained if you go read my series rewrite in the next few weeks!*

A normal day in a supernatural world. 

Step one, wake up. 

Waking up is a long process for me. My lovely hyperactive boyfriend did what he always does for me each morning, wake up about thirty minutes before me, sit there as still as he can (which is not very still) to let me sleep in, give up after ten minutes and then get out of bed. Stiles woke up at six this morning, playing with my hair as I slept before he finally got out of bed. Like every morning since we started doing this, he placed his pillow and a spare flannel in my arms so I wouldn't  ‘get cold and lonely’, and then went to get himself ready for school. This was a relatively short process, throw on some pants, decide between a sweatshirt or a flannel, find the backpack and then he's pretty much done. For me on the other hand, it's a little different.

“y/n/n, I gave you five extra minutes. You gotta get up.” I groaned and moved the pillow that was in my arms to cover my face. To my disappointment Stiles took it off and started peppering me with kisses until I opened my eyes with a scowl on my face.

“I love you but I really hate you.” He gave me a classic Stiles grin as he moved backwards off of the bed. 

“I know, you make sure to tell me that every time I wake you up.” 

After walking out the door, and then back to it within seconds to make sure I was actually getting up, Stiles went downstairs to make some coffee and left me to get ready. I was running late, per usual, but by the time I made it to the car all of my things were there waiting for me, along with Stiles who held out a travel cup of coffee just the way I like it and forcibly handed me a banana.

“Eat.” I shook my head and motioned for him to drive. 

“Too early, If I eat right now I'll actually puke all over your car.” He started the car and drove with one hand as he kept the banana extended. 

“Babe, we do this every morning and every morning I remind you that-” I snatched the fruit from his hand as I finished his sentence. 

“Breakfast is important and if you don't eat it in three hours you're going to come to me during class with a panicked look on your face telling me you think you're about to pass out. I know, I remember.” 

I sound sarcastic like this every morning, but even through the snide remarks and the occasional unnecessary and undeserved insult, Stiles still looks at me like I'm the answer to the universe.

Step two, school. For this one I recommend that you don’t do what I manage to do every year, fill your schedule with all honors and AP classes, zero breaks or study halls, and more than three extra-curriculars.

I won't bore you with the rather slow details of a highschool senior. I will however give you this, classes are hard, I don't think I will ever be able to use a red pen in my entire life, and with each passing day somehow I find a way to be even more stressed than the day before. 

The day ended with me sitting on a bench with Lydia and Malia, watching our boys play lacrosse from across the field and inevitably laughing our asses off whenever either of them would look over to make a face at us and get tackled or hit with something from the field. Ah the simple pleasures, you know? As we both waited for Stiles and Scott, Lydia and I spread our various school textbooks out on the bench in front of us, in all about sixteen heavy books set open as we studied. When Coach finally blew his whistle with one ear shattering blow after another the boys ran to us, practically dripping in sweat. Stiles bound up the bleachers, skipping some of the steps and leaned down in front of me, waiting for a kiss. I didn't look up from my textbook, and neither did Lydia as she responded to the boys while hovering over her calculus homework.

“Nice try boys, but before you even think about going anywhere but a dog kennel, you need to take showers.” There were a few mumbled protests but again without looking up she shooed them with her hands. 

“Come on, off you go.” I giggled a little as they marched away in defeat, their cleats making a crunching sound when they reached the grass. 

Step three, finally to get home, only to have to go to a pack meeting. 

Like every other Friday the pack all met in Scotts living room, this time all agreeing to stay away from anything breakable. I promised Melissa I wouldn't let them destroy the house while she was out, and I keep my promises. At the moment there were no big problems. Though I still wince a little when I say it, it seems like everything in Beacon Hills is… normal. As weird as that sounds. But we still meet once a week, every week it becomes more of a group study/hangout than a real meeting, but spending time with our friends was more valuable than any solution we had come up with before. The only issue to discuss at this meeting was me. I wouldn't call it an issue exactly, but after finding out about my… species? People? Clan? I don't know what to call it, but after finding out about what I am, we still have almost no information about what that really means, for me or for them. 

“Liam, as much as I appreciate the input, I don’t think being a truth seeker literally means that I can cheat on multiple choice tests. Even if it did, morally I will tell you again, cheating is a bad thing, and also none of my classes use multiple choice.” 

They all tried their best to put Stiles and I at ease, telling us that in time we would figure it all out. But that was the thing, we didn't have time. We’re seniors just a few months from leaving this town for college, and once I leave I don't see myself flying across the country once a week just so that I can make sure I know the “truth” of Beacon Hills. The sun finally set and Stiles and I said our goodbyes, walking hand in hand out the jeep before heading to his house for the night. 

Step four, stay up until three in the morning looking for answers about what supernatural powers you have. yeah , I know, that one's a kicker. 

As soon as Stiles and I stepped foot in the door of his room we threw off our bags and changed into sweatpants. I took the flannel he gave to me this morning and placed it over my tank top as we stood in front of his clear board as if waiting for an idea to come to us by itself. The board was still blank, nothing there but a picture of me and Stiles together at the lookout in the woods. A little reminder that no matter what crazy ideas are thrown onto this board, we always have each other. We settled into our usual spots, Stiles standing and pacing in the middle of the room while I spread books and papers out over his bed, laying on my stomach and staring into the pages. 

Finally, Step five, wait for the full frustration to kick in, and then once it's there, find a cute boy to calm you down.

I was laying flat on my stomach with four books in front of me, two from school, two from Lydia on the supernatural. I was hoping that in between my AP calculus homework and my college physics textbook I could figure out something new about my identity. News flash, it wasn't working. I groaned at the words in front of me, frustrated that for some reason the letters were swimming in and out. I took the books (all four of them) and slammed them shut before throwing them aggressively onto the ground in front of Stile’s bed and then taking the papers and just tossing them onto the air without any thought of aim or purpose. Stiles stopped pacing and stood still in front of his board, which now had a few red squiggles here and there along with the photo and a horrible attempt at drawing a wolf. He turned slowly to me with a marker in his hands.

“You good?”

“Not really.” He nodded and walked over, sitting beside me on the edge of the bed and putting the marker down. While I was still lying on my stomach he placed a hand on my back and rubbed it slowly.

“baby, do you know what time it is right now?” I placed my head in my hands and responded. 

“No. Do I want to?” 

“No, but I'm going to tell you anyway. It's three in the morning.” I said nothing and just signed into my hands. Stiles ignored my angry sighs and continued. 

“Babe do you know what that means?” I shook my head. 

“Well first of all it means that you are probably exhausted, which is why you're getting so frustrated with yourself, but more importantly it means that we have two hours before that night time diner downtown closes.” I looked up fast. 

“Are you talking about the one with the pie, and the fries and the shakes.” He looked at me very seriously and nodded. Without another word I popped up on the bed and threw on a pair of crocs.

 “Stiles, no matter what I say in the mornings when you wake me up, I love you so much I think you might even be higher on my list than eating pie at three in the morning.” He gave me a broad smile and kissed me on the cheek. 

“Say no more, love.”

[akslz]

"You must be an angel"

---- Hello!! this is my first post here so apoligies if its not formatted well. Regardless; here is a mediocre ( orignally written on a03 by me, linked here) story I wrote on a whim, about a broken family put back together once they move to Nockfell after an incident with Knives (our main character) and her mother. She and her brother meet the gang and silliness ensues. AKA a shitty modern day SF fanfic because head full, this is a self-insert character so sorry no y/n. she is loosely based off of me so blah blah ok here backstory time & yes there is homestuck refences and NO I do not care ☹ let me do what I do #autism !! English is a poor language for me so apologies for mistakes!! None of the fanart/ images used are mine, credits to owners!-----

CHAPER 1:

End of the Beginning

what seem like decades ago, Knives lived with her semi put together family in the ever so urban Houston Texas. With her twin brother Vinnie (or Vin) and her eldest brother Silas everything was just peachy. That was until their father had died of heart complications when Knives was just 11.

After that sad excuse of a day the widowed Miki became a pathetic shell of a mother. She lived by her ever empty bottle of wine or shitty canned beer. To the point where she became more of a roommate than a mother. Knives had to do something about this.

She wasn’t going to sit back and watch as her older brother work his senior year of high school away at some mediocre grocery store just so Miki could blow most of his minimal paycheck on alcohol. On April 14th, just days away from knives & Vins’ birthdays, knives decided to confront her mother. Here’s how the interaction went down. (First person pov)

“You crazy bitch who do you think you are?!” you mother slurred as she quickly tried to grab the bottle of wine that you started to pour down the drain.

“Me? Crazy? Please.” You said in a monotone voice as you finished dumping out the bottle and swiftly moved out of the way of your monstrous mothers’ grasp. Your brothers used to go onto the roof when things were easier, they taught you how to fight, or ‘strife’ they called it. You had gotten well at defending yourself over those couple of months. even being able to use your newfound skills against a creep at the mall.

“Please don’t do this, I just want to help you momma I promise!” you said grabbing her hands and looking up into her glazed eyes.

“Let go of me! You brat! I’m an adult and I can do as I want! Do not tell ME what I can and can’t do!” she said as she pushed you forward; causing your smaller body to hit the counter behind you.

As brush your long hair out of your face and you steady yourself you look back to your mother to see her lunge at you. You could never hurt your mother. Not ever. She’s just a little girl who’s distraught over her husband and best friend of 16 years dying. You couldn’t punish her for lashing out. She’s just scared.

 You feel warm now, you have a stinging spot on your head so instinctually you went to scratch it. Then comes the pain, it’s almost everywhere; you groggily open your eyes to look at your hand as it feels wet, blood. It was blood. You jolt up, now realizing you’re on the dining room floor. Your full vision slowly comes back, and you’re horrified at the sight. Chunks of your beautiful hair is sprawled around you.

 Your hair that held the last memory of your father. You used to crawl into bed with him and your mother in the mornings that you woke up before them. He used to always tuck your hair behind you bejeweled ears and hum you back into a light sleep. You grasp a chunk of the mangled hair and spread it between your fingers. Slowly beginning to cry. The pain on your extremities was nothing compared to this. You just slowly lowered yourself back onto the fake hardwood floor and cried, cried because you didn’t know what else to do.

 You wanted nothing but for everything to go back to the way it was. You starred at the entrance to your apartment, watching the very minimal light from the peep hole shine in, casting light on the dust particles in the air. It felt like the world was spinning in slow motion. You were dreading the time Silas and Vin come back from the music store. You cried for what felt like hours. You eventually sat up and noticed the keys to one of the two cars your family had owned was missing. You weakly stood up and hobbled to your mothers’ room, seeing drawers strewn over the already messy room.

“Great. Pansy ass bitch.” You said as your voice cracked. Crying again as you realized your mother had fled.

 You didn’t care though as you heard your brothers obnoxiously loud keys jiggle the lock open. You shuffled into the dining room, quickly observing the scene left behind. A broken wine bottle, small spots of blood with of course your white hair scattering the room. You dropped to your knees and touched your head for the first time since you woke up. You began sobbing again. The rest was a haze. You vaguely remember your older brother cupping your head; asking what happened. The only thing you could mutter was ‘’ Momma”. That’s all he needed to hear.

After that it’s a blur. Due to your mothers fleeing and your brother being freshly 19, he gains custody of you and your twin.

CHAPTER 2:

Beginning of the End

~Time skip: 3 years after incident, age:15~

You innocently lean against your bed, plucking mindlessly at your well-loved bass. The vibrations running through your fingers.

“yo“ Vinnie says as he comes into your shared room, pushing up the shades he always adorned and swooping his platinum hair out of his face. You found it funny, you rarely see him without the sunglasses.

“Hey man, did Bro mention anything about what school we’ll be goin’ to after we move?’’ you questioned as you shut off your amplifier and faced him fully. He sat down at his desk and kicked his feet up on the nearby bedpost.

“Yeah, actually he did, it’s near the shithole surprisingly, so we could probably skate to & from the hellhole instead of riding in the bus” He referred to the apartments we planned to live in as the ‘shithole’ because in all honesty, it wasn’t lavish. On the website it looked quite old, but it’ll do for the three of you. The real name of your new crib was ‘Addison Apartments’.

You set your bass down as you glanced at your mostly packed room. The stacks of cardboard boxes occupying most of the free space.

‘’I can’t believe this our last weekend in Texas...” Vinnie sighed and got up to stand next to you as you turned to glance out the window of your Highrise apartment. You’re not going to miss the hustle and bustle of urban Texas; the constant traffic and shouting kept you up frequently. You leaned onto your brother as he comfortingly wrapped an arm around you and sighing.

“I know, it’ll be a nice change though, Nockfell looks chill.” He said rubbing circles onto your arm.

Later on you go into the bathroom to take off your makeup, when your mother defaced you she gladly didn’t do as much damage as you initially thought. Your long hair now was medium length with layers. You honestly loved the change of appearance. You also decided to dye the tips of your hair a dusty rose because you’ve always liked the idea of a colorful head of hair, even if its just a little.

-

“Finally, I finished packing the moving van with my and my brothers’ shit’’, you thought, never understood why they needed so many electronics, turntables, keypads, electric pianos, they had it all. They sure did love their pop music. You, Knives, on the other hand liked all music types, but you really loved heavy metal. The way that Sanity’s Falls bass shook your head every time you listened to it just make your love for metal grow. You laughed at how ironic it was that your name was Knives, AND you liked heavy music, how metal is a name like that?

Vin stumbled out of the entrance to the apartment building, his headphones sitting heavily on his shoulders as he chucks his skateboard and your roller skates in the back of bros’ pickup. You had all finished getting ready for the drive, you and your twin glances at each other and then to your guardian.

Bro wiped sweat from his forehead and adjusted his pointy shades “Alright y’all let’s get this show on the road, its a long drive so let’s get started. I wanna make it at least halfway by tonight.”

You and Vin were going to drive the pickup while Bro drove the chunky U-Haul. Although you both couldn't legally drive, your brother decided on a whim to teach the both of you a couple months ago so you had a general idea of what you were doing. You were nervous to make the lengthy drive because you had a fear that if you got pulled over that you and your brother would both be sent to juvey.

Regardless, you made the drive. The 48 hour journey was taxing but when you stepped out of the car in Nockfell you realized that this place was way different than Texas and you had no clue what was to come.

After reconnecting with your eldest brother after the long drive you made your way into the lobby as your brothers unlocked the moving van. You realize that there was no receptionist desk only a small mail cubby area. you remembered that Bro mentioned you would be staying in unit 403. So you made your way over to that cubby and you realized that you needed a key to unlock. \

You did not know where to obtain such key so being the genius you are you stuck your smallest fingers' nail into the key slot and tugged & wiggled out a little bit to see if it was unlocked and thankfully it was! you grabbed the few pieces of junk mail that had already gathered and threw them away, then picked up the thin envelope that contained the apartment keys and gently opening it and removing the keys

you made your way to the elevator and hit the button for your floor you jogged quickly to your apartment and unlocked it. You push open the door to see a glum looking room with a green-gray carpet that held a few stains.

You scrunch your nose due to you smelling heavy cleaner and bleach, but at least it was clean, you quickly set down the keys and make your way out leaving the door open so you and your siblings can easily go in and out without having to worry about the door.

-

After you brought up all the boxes with your name on it and set them in your room you put your hands on your hips, sighing, and glancing around the room. You were excited to finally have your own room away from your brother, but it would be a change because you had been bunking with him since you two were little. Reminiscing about all the times you had spent together was making you feel nostalgic.

Vin and Bro had made a quick run to the grocery store so they could stock up on some essentials for the fridge. You sat down and sliced open one of the cardboard boxes that was labeled “CDs” you were rummaging through it when you heard some mumbling coming from outside your room and heavy footsteps. You were surprised because you thought it would take your brothers a longer time to arrive back home, so you brushed yourself off and pushed the door open.

Your eyes widened in shock when you realize that the two people you heard in your apartment were in fact not your brothers but two strangers. One being a tall male with tanned skin and long brown hair having deep set eyes that carried bags heavier than anything. This person wore a cannibal corpse shirt with a beat-up flannel and gray jeans. The other person that you couldn't assume the gender of had electric blue pigtails hanging from each side of their head & wore red ripped jeans with fishnets underneath, combat boots along with a black crew neck, you also noticed that this person wearing what looked like a mask, you didn't think twice though because a lot of people these days were very expressive. It looks quite cool.

“uh…. hi...” you said sweetly but quietly, slightly hiding behind the door frame because you didn't know if these people were a threat or not. Just in case you reached over to your desk and put your hidden hand on it to feel for the box cutter you had laying on it.

“Oh! Hey man” the tall one with long hair said as he lifted his ringed hand and waved “sorry to intrude like this dude just wanted to give an introduction because we were told that a new tenant would be moving in, I’m Larry, Larry Johnson.” He took a step closer to you holding out his dominant hand for to shake.

“Hi... I’m Knives, yeah me and my brothers just moved here, nice to meet you” you reluctantly grabbed his hand your long nails accidentally brushing against him.

“Knives? Like the utensil? That's a cool ass nickname!” He said smiling noticing the gap in between his two front teeth. It kind of made him look like a Bunny.

“Thank you! But that's my real name.” You said awkwardly smiling leaning your head fully against the door frame of your room.

“Oh, and uh this is my friend Sal, but you can just call him Sally face! It's kind of like his nickname.” Larry said elbowing his shorter friend getting a low toned laugh out of Sal.

So, the mystery person is a guy, good to know. You could tell that you and Ben would get along well with them both.

“So, you said you had brothers, right? Where are they?” The bluenette questioned while stuffing his hands into his pockets.

“They went to the store I think but they should be back soon. How old are you guys?” you questioned. Quickly stuffing the box cutter into the backside waistband of your shorts and quickly tucking your Motley-Crue band shirt over it. You swiftly moved away from the door frame and took a step right outside the door and leaned against the wall, kicking one of your ankles over the other while withholding eye contact with Sal.

"we're both fifteen, how about you?" Larry questioned eyeing you 

"same. My twin is fifteen too, His name is Vin, I think you two would get along well. He likes cannibal corpse." you lied straight through your teeth, not knowing why. Vinnie never really liked metal. Hopefully he'll lie as well to cover your white lie. You were never good with people.... safe to say you're nervous for what's to come.

CHAPTER 3:

Every story starts somewhere

Hi hi I somehow forgot to mention that this story is NOT following canon events, i.e. no cult, just some vague paranormal activity   !All original characters belong to me, none of the canon characters mentioned are mine and do not have the rights to them!

You had spoken with the two for about 15 minutes before they saw themselves out. After they’d left you had mentally slapped yourself for being so socially inept, Vin and Silas would definitely make fun of you for this one.

“Hey hey Knives! We’re back with some food!” Silas said as he loudly slammed the door with his foot.

“And we bought apple juice! So come get some before I finish it all.” Vinnie barked as you made your way out of your now unpacked room.

“Thanks bro!” you said smiling widely at your older brother as he messed up your hair

The three of you lingered in the kitchen as you unloaded the groceries and unpacked the kitchen essentials.

“Something really weird happened earlier-“you said turning to face them both, you were met with darkened plastic sunglasses awaiting you to continue speaking

“These two guys from the apartments came to introduce themselves, Larry and Sal, surprisingly they were very chill. I kinda lied about you liking cannibal corpse to Larry though vin...” you said sheepishly smiling and covering your face with your hands.

“ Man what the hell why? I don’t dig metal that much” Your twin asked jokingly.

“They were just so… intriguing! I got embarrassed and it just slipped out!”

“Chillax sis its alright, don’t sweat it. So, these guys are what? Hardcore church burners?” Vin said making the demon horn motion with both of his hands.

You and Silas laughed as he obnoxiously headbanged.

“No not really, at least not from what I could tell. They were very nice. I’m pretty sure they go to our school since we’re all the same age. “Vin nodded for you to continue.

“Larry is a tall dude with what I have to say is the most beautiful hair I’ve ever seen on a man” you said throwing your hands up in defeat. Both of your brothers scoffing sarcastically.

“Then there’s Sal- “you began to remember the sight of the boy, something about him captivated you. Whether it was his unique hair, His killer style, the tone of his voice…...or the way his hands looked with all those rings on them… and the way you thought they’d look on you…

Girl, what the hell are you thinking?! You just met him? Stop being weird. You seriously needed to stop letting your hormones take control of you like this.

You’d realized your brother was looking at you strangely.

“Hellooooo? Anyone in there?” Vin said waving a hand in front of your face.

“Is she having another episode?” Silas asked, setting down the box he was moving and walking over to you.

“What? Oh sorry, No I’m fine, I just got lost in thought you guys don’t worry” you nervously laughed as they back away from you, relaxing their attention.

“Shit man you really worried me for a second…Anyways continue with what you were telling me about this Sal girl” Vinnie sighed now sitting on the counter across from you.

“Sal is a guy- “you said rolling your eyes “– but anyways. He’s sweet, he has this bright blue hair that’s really dope. He also wears this mask? I’m not sure what its about but it fits him, he has the same style of Larry he’s just a liiitttlllleee short…” you said making a “small” motion with your index and thumb.

“Hey, it’s not like the little guy can control it!” Vinnie said getting off the counter and poking at you.

You and he laughed as you made your way to his room to help him unpack his belongings.

-

The next day was Saturday. You were making your way down to the lobby with your brother to explore the area when on your way out of the dingy elevator you bumped into someone, accidently knocking something out of their hands.

“Oh my god I’m so sorry!” you apologized quickly kneeling to pick up papers and a purple school folder off the ground.

“It’s okay! I should’ve been looking where I was going” the feminine voice said giggling.

You handed the girl what you assumed was her schoolwork.

“Hey…are you new around here? I’ve never seen you before? And I think I’d remember someone this pretty” the girl said.

This girl was also quite pretty. With long brown hair and piercing green eyes, she wore a long purple shirtdress with purposely torn black tights. Along with a chunky black choker and heavier makeup, you started to really like this girl already.

“Thank you so much! You’re pretty too, and uhm yeah! Me and my brother just moved here recently, My names Knives. This is my brother Vinnie.” You said gesturing to Vinnie who threw up a weak wave to her as he seemed in awe.

“Knives?! That’s so awesome! My name’s Ashley but everyone just calls me Ash. Do you have insta or anything like that? You seem realllyyyy cool and I’d love to get to know you-“she said as she pulled out a lavender iPhone from her sleeve “- but I’m supposed to be tutoring with my friends right now and I’m already late, I’m afraid they’ll think I’m dead if I’m any more late” she said holding her phone out to you.

“Yeah, I do! Also, no problem I understand, you seem pretty chill as well!” you said slightly smiling as you typed your username into the search bar and then clicked on your profile as it came up. You handed Ash her phone back, she waved goodbye and jogged into the elevator.

“she seems nice, It seems like everyone here has awesome hair…” you said looking to Vinnie

“DID SHE FOLLOW YOU YET? LET ME SEE YOUR PHONE NOW, GIVE IT GIVE IT GIVE IT” he said reaching for your phone which was in your hand.

“Jesus man here fine, have a look god!” You laughed handing it to him. Vinnie snatched it out of your hand and flying to Ash’s’ profile.

You looked over his shoulder as he looked through her pictures, she had about 15 posts. Most were landscape but there were some of her and her friends. She was friends with Sal and Larry! That’s convenient! Vinnie swiped through the post of her and the guys on the 4th of July, there was also a pair of boys you hadn’t recognized yet. Safe to say you were excited to meet them both as well.

“Yo are these the guys you were talking about yesterday?” Vinnie said clicking on the profile mention on the picture, pulling up Sals’ account.

“Yeah! That’s cool that they’re friends. Makes me excited to hangout with them.”

Your brother finally handed your phone back after sending Ashley’s account to himself, you internally laughed at how eager he was to swoop this girl off her feet. You somehow made your way back to those pictures of Sal and everyone else on the 4th. You admired Sal, eventually tapping onto his profile, your thumb hovered over the ‘Follow’ button and you hesitated.

What if he thinks I’m a stalker? He didn’t even mention his socials so what if he thinks negatively of me just following him out of the blue? What if-

Then your eyes glance up at the notification you’d just received,

“New follower: @TheOG_SF – Sal Fisher”

CHAPTER 5 (4 was an update on the story):

Why is everything different now?

Heyyyy, finally got this damn story updated, my apologies, im learning more English now so they should be more frequent!

Holy shit, you thought, quickly swiping up the notification to dismiss it.

Were you hallucinating? You truly hoped you weren’t.

“ Yo are you alive?” you glanced up to Vinnie with a wide eyed expression

“ah yeah sorry…don’t know what washed over me, lets go” you said walking past him to the main doors to exit

-

You and your brother had eventually made your way into a nearby resale/music store. The both of you going to see if you could replace some of the CDs you’d had before you moved.

Unfortunately for you and him some of the discs were snapped or scratched up during transit from Houston to Nockfell. The two of you slowly made it outside; you rummage through your cluttered tote to get the keys to the truck. You eventually find them and toss them to vin.

-

Once we pulled into the parking lot of the music store vin took the keys out of the ignition and glanced to you. You were chewing on your fingernails again, that’s something you did when you were nervous. Or in deeeeeepppppp thought.

You just kept starring at the follower request, not knowing what to do. You’ve combed through all of ash’s’ friends’ profiles except sals. You were just…too nervous. You were never this nervous.

“Dude just follow him back, it’s been like 20 minutes.” Vin said leaning over to watch your phone. “Absolutely not! What if he thinks I’m weird? Or what if he just did it on accident, or what if-“ you kept talking as your brother slothed his arm over and gingerly accepted the follow request. You sat silently in shock as he shrugged. “Well alright... ill just leave my phone in the car I think” you said hooking your purse over your shoulder. Overthinking everything that could happen if he didn’t accept your request.

-

You rummaged through CDs, you only had a couple stuffed in your hands; Bring Me The Horizons’ “Suicide Season”, Pierce The Veils “Misadventures”, Madonna’s ‘’like a virgin’’, and finally Dark Thrones “Transvilaian Hunger”. Quite opposites if you ask me, you thought to yourself as you maneuvered through the thin isles of the shop. As your sifting through discounted vinyl’s you hear the chime of the electric doorbell, the one that annoyingly chimes every time someone enters or exits. You decide to ignore it and continue looking.

“Speak of the devil” Vinnie breathed out quietly and smirked as he gestured to who entered the store; Of course, it was Ash and her group of friends. One of those friends being Sal. You swiftly turn back to the vinyl bin. Pretending to be interested in its contents to seem busy.

“Oh hey! Look who it is” you heard the deep grungy voice of who you assumed was Larry. You still didn’t look up, frozen from anxiety. You never really felt like this… you didn’t understand why everything was changing so suddenly. You reluctantly turned around and smiled. “Hey knives! Looks like you discovered our best kept secret” you heard ash giggle as she threw her hands up in defeat.

“yeah” Sal laughed “This record store is one of the only good things in Nockfell” he continued. “Oh yeah? Well, I’d have to say its awesome, glad I found out yall’s ‘little secret’ “you said making air quotations.

“Believe me, we have better secrets than this.” Said an unfamiliar voice. “Well its nice to finally meet you, only today had they mentioned meeting you and trust me, they were all eager for me to meet you, I’m Todd” A shorter ginger boy with rounded glasses appeared from behind the other three. “Well, it’s nice to meet you too, Todd” you smiled; “Also, this is my partner, Neil” Another guy emerged, the same height as Todd. He waved sweetly and grinned.

-

“You having a party without me? Unbelievable.” Your brother jokingly scoffed as he finally came to take some of the spotlight off you. “Yo, nice to see you guys in person, I’m Vinnie, but I just go by vin.” He said as he shoved his rap CDs into your arms to go fist bump your new friends. “Nice to meet you man! I heard you liked cannibal corpse, right?” Larry said enthusiastically as he looked at vin.

“Yeah man...I love them…!” Vin said side eyeing you through his shades. Making you giggle

“Oh word? That’s sick, I love them too.” You heard Sal say to your twin. You caught yourself starring at Sally. He was just a lot to look at to be fair, not in a bad way. In a way you’d look at a renaissance painting, just taking in the intricacy. The guys were all conversating about what-not, you noticed how Sal spoke with his hands a lot. That’s funny, you do that too….

“Knives? You alright?” Ashley said waving a hand in front of your face, Todd furrowing his eyebrows confused while waiting for your response. “Huh? Oh yeah sorry I was just starring off into space.” You said as your eyes widened. You catch Todd exchanging a look to Ashley, and she returned that look; you had no clue what language they were speaking with their eyes.

-

You and your group checked out with your minimal items, you and Vinnie ended up leaving with the group. The five of them somehow walked to the record store? They must really like this place. The six of you have to somehow fit into Silas’s truck. Vinnie and Larry in the front seats, Ashley, Todd, and Neil in the back seats… Where were you going to sit? Where was Sal going to sit?! They definitely did this on purpose. 

------------------

Chapter 6 coming soon, thank you!!!

[manicpixxiedreambitch]

When I was eleven, my fifth grade teacher was ableist to me, not that I believe he was doing it intentionally. But he knew I had ADHD and got mad at me when I showed symptoms. He called me lazy and disobedient. He told me not to use my ADHD as an “excuse to be lazy”. He nicknamed me energizer bunny because I was showing symptoms like talking too much, going too fast, etc. One moment that stuck with me the worst though was when he pulled me into the hallway and towered over me (this part might be a little biased though, seeing as he was a grown adult and I was a small child) and he yelled at me, threatening to fail me.

For doodling on my papers. Said that even if all my work was done correctly on the assignment, if I doodled on my paper he would fail me.

And so I cried because what else was I supposed to do? I was eleven. And looking back, I know now that the doodling was a compulsive thing I did to help myself focus.

But when he saw the tears he just yelled “I don’t care if you cry!”

And I remember saying in a small voice “I know.”

I stopped doodling so much on my papers after that. Sure, I’ve drawn the occasional flower or eyeball on my papers, but not as wildly, not as freely as I used to do as a child. He engraved that fear of failing in me so bad that for years I was terrified of doodling on my papers.

Now I am in my senior year in high school. My last semester. And I just realized, that he can’t hurt me anymore. He can’t fail me. And because I’m starting a new chapter in my life, I want closure on something that hurt me for years. So last night, I sat down, and I respectfully wrote the teacher a four page letter. First I explained who I was. How I knew him. And then I apologized, and explained that this was probably not the kind of letter he was expecting. How I was writing the letter for closure. I let him know I do not hate him, and that I do not expect a response, nor do I want him to feel any guilt as a result. The letters main purpose was for him to know he hurt me.

I explained that I understand that a lot of my childhood actions had deserving consequences, however I did not deserve to be treated the way I was in his class. I told him how I was being bullied a lot, and had no friends at the time. I told him how I had ADHD, and how the way he treated me for showing symptoms was wrong. I said I felt like an alien, and I was treated like one. I brought up the nickname he gave me, how to this day I hate it. I wrote about that horrible day in the hallway, how it was from my perspective and how what he said stuck with me. How I did not realize teachers could be bullies until I entered his class. I stated that I did not deserve that. I was a child. How I am not being sensitive or a “snowflake”. How I am not saying he should have let me get away with doing anything I wanted, but he could’ve handled me as a student a little better. That my teacher was supposed to help me swim, not scold me for drowning. I was not a bad kid. I was a troubled kid. And yeah, I know you can’t help everyone, but it still hurt me.

And then I explained once again that I was sorry that this wasn’t the kind of letter he expected to receive from a former student. That perhaps to another student he might have been Mr. Falker, but not to me.

I am not lazy, I am not willfully disobedient, I am a human being. I have a human voice, and human emotions. And he did not treat me as such that day in the hallway, or when I was in his class. How the phrase “I don’t care if you cry” will forever sting at me any time I am upset.

I told him that I am in my senior year in high school. I am looking into a career in the field of art. And I write books, I am an author. And unfortunately, I can give no credit to that man for these accomplishments.

And after I finished writing the letter, I started doodling all over the margins. It was uncomfortable at first, it felt like I had artists block for doodling. But then I remembered all of the doodles I used to draw all those years ago, and I started doodling more. And as soon as most of the margins were covered, I know this sounds dramatic, but I swear I heard my fifth grade self laughing. She was saying “You’re gonna get in trouble! He’s gonna fail you!” And I was hit with the most sobering thought. “He’s not.”