#i wouldnt mind at least finding out if she's gay
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Once I went to pick up a friend from his work and his workmates asked him if I was his girlfriend the following day. That's how he came out at the workplace, after years. By just saying "oh, no. I'm not really into girls". Maybe you could "create" a somewhat similar situation? Good luck!
hahah thats normally how i like to do it, i want it to come up naturally because i feel super awkward trying to conjure up a situation to tell people! I will cross my fingers for that kind of a reason to bring it up
#like i already know she's cool about trans folks and such which is a good sign bc#we don't live in the most bustling metropolis of forward thinking folks but she never misgenders the trans patients and is accepting#so im like thats a good sign etc#anyways i didnt even think of her in any romantic interest way at first but after a while i just really started liking her personality and#i think shes v kind and cool and chill and checks a lot of good boxes so#i wouldnt mind at least finding out if she's gay#also i am only working with her for 1 year so at least it wouldnt be an inifinitely awkward workplace situation if things didnt work out#when i shot my shot#i keep thinking about how i told her i used to have a crush on one of the male patients when i knew him as a kid and wishing i didnt say#that now bc thats like the only thing ive ever said about my preferences to her but it was just like a grade 7 crush#not like a real actually would date him crush#but for all she knows about me so far im just straight probably#anyways my new mission is to be more obviously gay without feeling cringe and forced about it wish me luck#ask#anon#p
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chapter 1
“Thank you good sir” i havent seen this in a serious manner in a long time, and laughed cuz it sounded like 1890s memes 😭 im sorry
pulls the door open with ease. NO WAY I PUSHED AN PULL DOOR BYE U DIDNT HAVE TO ATTACK SOME OF US LIKE THAT 😭 violence i will be meditating
ALSO IS IT TAE OR JIN AAH HOLD ON JOON IS TALL TOO maybe kook??
“I’ve been a student here for quite some time actually” this sits at the same table as "how long have you been 17? a while"
oh it was jooniebug WHY IS OUR PRESIDENT A DICK 😭😭
“At least I don’t look like a stoner from the seventies” JIN STOP, HOBI U LOOK AMAZING
funky what is funky why is funky when is funky where is funky how is funky who is funky
what is she studying to have history and human anatomy together?/srs. ooh literature with different stuff for minor
boi i havent heard the word coolio in a decade, the last time probably while reading ff in 2014
oh my god its the bad boy. is it yoongi? YES I WAS RIGHT
4 HOUR LECTURE ON ONE TOPIC?? BOI I WOULD HAVE DIED AND RESURRECTED IN THAT TIME. i have 2 hour lectures with 5 minute after an hour and its amazing
"No reason really”, *plays why u always lying meme
Hoseok agrees with a quirk of his perfectly styled eyebrow. YES HIS EYEBORWS ARE HOT AS FUCK
ofc kook is a sports major
rest of the Alpha dirt”, damn hoseok really got beef with them
status from royal blood? eww hoseok is slay for that *me acting like i wasnt being a thot while reading yoongi, tae, kook drabbles/oneshots
FUCK SOCIETY
“Dear lord, give me strength”, jin and joon with bangtan
JIMIN WTF U WERE SUPPOSED TO BE LIL FLUFF BEAN *bitch stop u knew how they were in the beninging(yes i misspelled for the meme) YES KICKING IN THE SHIN SUPREMACY
what is a hacky sack? i found out its a game? but what is he exactly studying lol?
also its the way she is making friends and talking to people LIKE SHE SPOKE WORDS YALL could never be me, sure i would have asked someone to help me to my classes but i wouldnt be talking after that, would have said im busy even though im not
if you would excuse me, but you’re quite weird, BYE IM LEAVING THE EARTH THIS IS THE 2ND TIME IM EMBARRASSED you can find me in 134340 business days, where i will be rotting under my blankie bye
“Perfect, now that everyone is welcomed accordingly. an example of when theater theaters in the most theater form
It leaves you wondering what he meant with that. u know what he meant by that, this is where you do the whole twilight thing
“I feel I just witnessed a man high on three different drugs theatre kids in a nutshell (apparently people on tumblr are either gay, english major or a theatre kid, and i sent the meme to my friends, guess what they said................... "looks like you fit all three category" our schools dont have it, but im apparently a theatre kid to them 😭)
WHY DOES THIS MAN WANT TO KILL ME SHUT UP I HATE YOU GO AWAY *gets closer again
How is he walking that quietly you walk with your entire feet, part by part, like in those "special" shoes ads, that helps in reducing sound. slow yet quick
“well, that is indeed a predicament.” oof so elegant, classy, AND RUDE (there 2seok, happy?)
your voice actually comes out squeaky. girl mine would have came quiet yet squeaky way before 😭
BABY CONNECT THE DOTS HOW DID THEY GET THAT FAST QUIETLY??
let’s get the 1860 one.” IS SHE THAT SPECIAL?? WHATS GOING ON AAAH
Seokjin actually answers him with a quiet “yeah!” OFC HE WOULD DO THAT
THEY GOT DEAD BODIES IN THE FREEZER
If you died here tonight EXACTLY U GONNA DIE BYE GIRL, YOU WILL (NOT) BE MISSED jk jk lol
ig kook is scared of girls *eww that was cringe bye Maybe he just needed to take a really urgent shit OH MY GOD PLS😭😭 this is going to stay in my mind forever, everytime i see him running im gonna think of this no doubt
“exactly, that is the reason. He is really shy.” aww such a shy lil bean OK BUT IK THATS NOT THE REASON *inserts suspicious hobi eyes
you must have the crispiest oxygen sounds like an indian water ad, that said "more of oxygen " Arrey yaar h2o water has not turned into h2o2 toxic hydrogen peroxide 😭
i love ur descriptions, they are very picturable and i love the vibes. it is soo good, i could smell the place? the seats, library, just the university smell, restaurant. it was great. i dont think my words do any justice lol
NO WAY I PUSHED AN PULL DOOR BYE U DIDNT HAVE TO ATTACK SOME OF US LIKE THAT 😭 violence i will be meditating
I think this is like a universal human experience to push a few pull doors lmaooa
ALSO IS IT TAE OR JIN AAH HOLD ON JOON IS TALL TOO maybe kook??
questions over question mhmhmmhm
oh it was jooniebug WHY IS OUR PRESIDENT A DICK 😭😭
QUESTIONS OVER QUESTIONS INDEED
what is she studying to have history and human anatomy together?/srs. ooh literature with different stuff for minor
honestly? i gotta be honest with you, don't think too deeply about the logistics of her studies. i chose her courses for the sake of plot and nothing else LMAOAO
boi i havent heard the word coolio in a decade, the last time probably while reading ff in 2014
coolio still slaps like 10/10 word (also you see how I made them using "outdated" words wink wink almost as if they were from a different time wink wink)
oh my god its the bad boy. is it yoongi? YES I WAS RIGHT
BADBOY YOONGI AWOO
Hoseok agrees with a quirk of his perfectly styled eyebrow. YES HIS EYEBORWS ARE HOT AS FUCK
THEY ARE THANK YOU FOR SAYING THAT
ofc kook is a sports major
djjfja thinking back, it makes no sense for him to also study JFJDAFJ (you'll understand it later fasdjfj)
JIMIN WTF U WERE SUPPOSED TO BE LIL FLUFF BEAN *bitch stop u knew how they were in the beninging(yes i misspelled for the meme) YES KICKING IN THE SHIN SUPREMACY
HAHHHAHAH he may have tricked you fadjfjas
what is a hacky sack? i found out its a game? but what is he exactly studying lol?
yes it's a game fakdsfka in theory he studies dance PLEASE don't think too much about the logistic I literally just went with vibes
also its the way she is making friends and talking to people LIKE SHE SPOKE WORDS YALL could never be me, sure i would have asked someone to help me to my classes but i wouldnt be talking after that, would have said im busy even though im not
i get both sides like i would want to make friends but would be too scared that they would hate me FADJFJ if people like 2seok talked to me though? helloooooo :)
if you would excuse me, but you’re quite weird, BYE IM LEAVING THE EARTH THIS IS THE 2ND TIME IM EMBARRASSED you can find me in 134340 business days, where i will be rotting under my blankie bye
hahahahhaha this part is actually so embarassing bHAHAHHAHAHAH
“I feel I just witnessed a man high on three different drugs theatre kids in a nutshell (apparently people on tumblr are either gay, english major or a theatre kid, and i sent the meme to my friends, guess what they said................... "looks like you fit all three category" our schools dont have it, but im apparently a theatre kid to them 😭)
i don't get the hate on theater kids, all I see is people who don't fit into the "societal norm" and are therefore labelled as weird losers. we don't have stuff like "theater kid" or "sports kid" in Austria either becuse school is solely there to study not to offer clubs but I still never understood the weird hatered some clubs get in America jfdjfa
THEY GOT DEAD BODIES IN THE FREEZER
👀👀👀👀
ig kook is scared of girls *eww that was cringe bye Maybe he just needed to take a really urgent shit OH MY GOD PLS😭😭 this is going to stay in my mind forever, everytime i see him running im gonna think of this no doubt
as for now it seems like he is ooooh 👀
“exactly, that is the reason. He is really shy.” aww such a shy lil bean OK BUT IK THATS NOT THE REASON *inserts suspicious hobi eyes
SUSPICIOUS INDEED MHHHHM
i love ur descriptions, they are very picturable and i love the vibes. it is soo good, i could smell the place? the seats, library, just the university smell, restaurant. it was great. i dont think my words do any justice lol
OMGG THANK YOU!! gosh this is actually such a big compliment :( I'm so happy to know that I managed to really make you exprience the place gaaah thank you for this review heheh 💜💜
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Hey sorry about the delay on this post but here is the phantom bomber ship dynamic breakdown post
I will not pull any punches and i will be blunt, if i forget anyone its because ive litterally never seen them shipped before, this post is also under the assumption that all of the characters listed are 18+ (covering my bases here, ykno?)
Starting out with ol' reliable phantom/blue. This ship dynamic is the most canon fueled and widely shipped out of the dynamics ive seen.. for good reason! They make good foils for eachother in a way that meshes really nicely and that can make for undeniably sweet n cute moments. Beit blue snuggled up and snoozing while phantom does late night work or simply the homoerotic tension that comes from blue beta testing his code and absolutely exploiting every bug, i think blue would be quite healthy for him. 5 stars. Good ship.
While discussing the bomber siblings, ill address a ship dynamic i have been told ive forgotten in the past. Being phantom/black, a ship I've seen that presumably cites the credits of sbr1 on the grounds of them seeming to interact post R. While i didnt pay much mind to it, i can see the merit given that interaction in canon is like looking for water in the Sahara desert. Black, being blunt... Is a dumb bitch (affectionate) which could bounce off phantom pretty well, likely the two bonding over a fondness of the theatrical... if feelings do develop i cant shake the feeling that phantom would be the first to engage.. i think phantom would engage as hes the least awkward about romance out of the two by default. And i think black would be hesitant and have a crisis about "oh my god am i gay???" (No honey youre bisexual its ok) . The entire relationship hinges on whether or not you think they could both get past their own egos and not beat eachother to death about it. ultimately could be a decent ship! I think they work better as friends personally. 3 stars.
Ok, now onto the dastardly bombers oriented ships, these will probably get a little controversial
phantom/magnet is a ship that i find VERY funny because i think itd not work at all romantically. Sorry to the exactly one person ive seen ship this but im taking R at face value for this post, they would constantly squabble and could honestly not stand eachother in any intimate situation besides the bedroom and even then i think that wouldnt be satisfactory for either of them lmao. Magnet would INSIST on topping and it would suck really bad. 1 star. Not a fan they seem more like friendly rivals instead tbh
phantom/golem on the other hand would make a GREAT dynamic imo, always pops into my head every now and then. Golem, despite not really speaking much is a kind and gentle soul. Making for a great anchor to phantom. I tend to think of them more platonic, but i DO think they'd have good romantic chemistry. They like to hang out and sit near eachother like cats and simply enjoying eachother's company... Phantom could study his mane of flora and tell him about every little insect that inhabits his garden and i think golem would happily listen making inquisitive beeps about things. And i personally headcanon phantom tends to have issues remembering to maintain himself in his working hours, i think golem takes time to remind him to. Sweet dynamic. 4 stars. One of my favorites.
Ok so. I think phantom/karaoke *could* work... But phantom/pretty could not. You feel me? Like hands down theyre good friends either way, but karaoke amd phantom have a little more of a spark there. since pretty is... Bland in R. To say the least. Im not a fan i can see her visiting him and them holding good conversation, nothing more really. But karaoke has classic pretty mannerisms, being quite charismatic and flirty in a way i think could absolutely decimate him. Like after a long ramble about his latest project she would stare him dead in the eye after picking up about half of what he said and asking him if he wants to make out or something to fuck with him and he would go bright purple. Decent ship. 1 star for pretty but 3 for karaoke. Round it down to a 2 if you want
Ok onto the ship i think i may have brought into existence... phantom/plasma, I honestly think plasma would also make a good supportive anchor to phantom, similar to golem but in a more active way. I think they'd mesh well personality wise, theyre both seemingly quite good natured at heart if the snippets from R can be trusted, i think their shared compassion could breed understanding and trust between the two, trust blossoming into something more down the line. Not a relationship that would happen over night but one that i honestly am a sucker for. They should curl up together and watch movies in the cold winter. Good comfort ship. 5 stars. Fight me over this im not budging.
Phantom/me.
I love him. That is all phantom ships. Goodbye.
#phantom bomber#lunar myth rambles#ship post#shipping#im not tagging everyone else.#im unsure if ive posted the full art i used at the end of the post but its cropped from a larger sketch sheet of blood moon#i left out the brain ship breakdown because i realised some genius would mistake it for selfcest </3
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fuck it games i played update post
tonight was just Chicory? i think? yeah
i wanted to play mc as well but i got so into chicory that i didnt have time
anyway spoilers for Chicory under cut
(also storytime and screenshots; at the end a little analysis about parallels between chicory and hollow knight)
ok so screenshots first(there's a lot of them)
ok so first of all i managed to diagnose the bug that made it so my cursor would randomly snap to the bottom-right for a single frame. playing in windowed mode seems to solve it. not ideal, but at least drawing isnt as frustrating
^ thanks for the reddit gold trash kind stranger!
^ hullo! ^-^
^ it's shit but i wanted to show off the holey design i made
^ the facial expressions of everyone lmao
^ still dont really know who the vandal is. anyway butts ehehe
^ I'm sorry but Nintendon't won't show mercy for that
^ her face expression (again) lmao
^ ace icon? or gay icon? queer icon nonetheless (yes that there is a very crude attempt at drawing little ghost)
^ love him (disregard the paintings)
^ somebody's horny on main
^ POTATO
^ Horn't shirt
^ ok fuck you game given the tools given and my skill level im actually kinda proud of what i managed to do fuck you (<2)
^ I forgot to make screenshots with the other lines related to this but... fuck i relate to chicory so much. The impostor syndrome. the self-hatred. except that im actually shit compared to what she canonically does but like. That only made what she did to Cupcake (idk i named my character like that. They asked for food it's not my fault) hit even harder on me. I am talentless. I do have no experience. But fuck you (<2) for being so relatable to me specifically and for making me see myself in both characters
^ why, hello there
Ok now i shorter analysis of connections between Chicory and Hollow Knight (maybe also Celeste?) cause it's 1AM and I'm kinda tired
(spoilers for both games)
(also have in mind that i still havent finished chicory)
Ok i first of all find really interesting the theme and the title of both chicory and hk. The title represents a character. Not hte playable character like in other games, but the final Boss, or at least the (apparent) source of Bad in the world. Granted i do no know for sure the final boss of chicory. and technically hk isnt the final boss of hk. I wouldnt be surprised if the final boss in chicory is my own depression. But that's beside the point.
Both characters, Chicory and Hollow, were left with immense responsibilities upon their shoulders. And both of them failed due to mental roadblocks. Because there was nobody to help them. Because they were supposed to be the best. And while they were extremely skilled, they became their own enemy. This caused in both cases, Corruption. Now, in one case it's the manifestation of a literal god that acts like a hivemind. In the other it's the negative thoughts of someone wielding a tool with pretty much godly powers. Same thing really.
Moreover, this Corruption manifests itself onto the entire land (we do not take into account the exceptions in HK and the possible exceptions in Ch. once again, i havent finished the latter). And it is in the hands of the player, representing somebody that was cast out, rejected by the ones they looked up to, but in the end becoming the best out of everyone, to fix it all.
The point is i dont know. But im excited to see how the plot of Ch unfolds
(also the idea i had about celeste was how Madeline and Chicory are in similar situations with their mental health. But unlike Madeline, Chicory does not accept any outside help, nor does she seek help herself (at least not yet)) (yeah this idea has even less sense now. disregard it if you will)
#green bear spam#my gamefiles#my savefiles#chicory#hollow knight#my essays#<that might become a thing? idk
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Can you do a zuko x male reader or gender neutral. It could be about the reader witnessing the agni Kai and watching zuko get banished. The reader tries to go with zuko but zuko doesn’t want the reader to get hurt. Years later they meet at the boiling rock. You can take it from there. I love your writings and I’ll keep supporting you 💕
a/n: oooooh! thank you anonnie!! i appreciate your requests!!!
lets get it!
okay so you and zuko were TURTLEDUCK BUDDIES
attached to the hip basically
azula HATED how close you two were bc hello she’s right here???
i mean you and zuko trained together
fed ducks together
best buds
you knew you liked zuko alot but you didn’t understand?
like you started to get flustered around him
same with zuko
and azula was PLOTTING NOW
she doing a think rn with one of her BRILLIANT ideas 😐
“oh n/n! zuzu! come play a game with us!”
zuko’s flight or fight reflexes are triggered and he’s ready to DIP
but you r unfortunately intrigued
“oh okay ‘zula! cmon zu!”
cue azula’s smug lil grin
she puts an apple on your head and makes you stand in front of the fountain
you’re like ???? is this the game?
azula’s like it is n/n it’ll be fine
it was NOT fine
she damn near burnt you to a crisp if it wasnt for zuko tackling you into the fountain
now azula, ty lee and mai are LAUGHIN
but we all know mai lwk a lil jelly
you and zuko are embarrassed as fuck
you both are soaked and he’s hovering over you
mr zuzu looking real pretty
he just turns red and pulls you up before running away
zuko is like ???? boys are cute especially this one???
you two still remained close after this incident
two lil gays boys who are trying to not crush on e/o
(im sorry the only thing i can think about when i think of zuko is his gay ass lil scream in the prototype pilot episode)
(nigga said wwAHHH)
anyways
azula teased you about zuko speaking out against a general and their dad is angry and you’re like oh shit
suddenly you arent allowed to visit zuko anymore
and you’re like wtf no no let me in
the guards said no
you’re so paranoid too
is he okay?
what fully happened?
soon the agni kai is announced to happen
and you are seated next to iroh and azula
you’re clutching onto your pants as you watch zuko walk into the arena
you really dont want him to get hurt
your eyes widened as you watched zuko’s father walk into the arena and your heart drops
zuko is clearly surprised and frightened
tears are rolling down your cheeks bc you are so so so scared for him
iroh covers your eyes as he looks away when zuko got burned and you could feel your heart break as you listened to his cries of pain
you cried out as iroh pulled you into a hug
you and iroh immediately rushed to the infirmary to get to zuko
you push past those guards and nurses bc you are on a MISSION
aint nobody getting in your way like this bc you will STOMP they asses out
you are not leaving his side
“z-zu are you okay? can you hear me?”
“m-m/n? where are you? i cant see”
zuko is starting to panic due to the fact his left eye is patched close
you hold his hand “i’m right here zu. shh im here”
he’s so overwhelmed too poor baby
“u-uncle? w-where is he?”
“right here zuko.”
you help him sit up and he grabs a mirror immediately
he frowns at his reflection
“you’re still handsome zuko.” you said
iroh pretended to not see that blush that sat on zuko’s cheeks
“i-i’ve been banished, m/n.”
“what?”
“i’m banished from here. the only way i can come back is if i capture the avatar.”
“but he’s been gone for years zuko! let me come with you”
“no! it’ll be too dangerous”
“how? we trained together! grew up together? how is it too dangerous?”
“no m/n! i dont want to lose you!”
“you wont lose me zuko.”
“you dont know that. you arent coming with me.”
you and him went back and forth
after he shaved his hair and was about to board his boat you pulled him away
then you confessed right then and there
i mean you didnt know when you’ll see him again
“i like you zuko. more than a friend”
“what?”
“i like you.”
“are you for real? this isnt a joke right? like azula didn’t put you up to this?”
“no she didnt.”
“oh thank the spirits. i like you too.”
and yall have this lil awkward ass kiss
just a short lil peck?
i mean yall are 12/13 and two boys you think they gonna go all out tonguing niggas? lmao
you two hug before iroh calls him over
“i’ll wait for you zuko”
“i’ll try my best.”
and he’s gone
over the years zuko was gone he was so sad
“if i capture the avatar i can come back to the fire nation and m/n”
but clearly the whole LeMmE cAtCh tHe AvAtAr thing was dropped when he got that glow up
(neya said 🦋🦋🦋🦋 whenever they look at zuko cmon NOW.)
now they’re otw to boiling rock
“my first girlfriend turned into the moon.”
“that’s rough buddy.”
and sokka’s like you ever dated someone before?
zuko’s like..... two people?
“that knife throwing girl?”
“her and m/n. though we never got to date bc at the time i was literally banished. i miss him alot though.”
bi king ✨
“what if he’s at the boiling rock?”
“then i’ll find him.”
sokka’s like yes my man get your MANS
“okay so we look for my dad, suki and your husband”
“he’s not my husband sokka.”
“..... my dad, suki and your husband”
“omfg shut your trap.”
these pair of himbos finally get inside and are on a MISSION
sokka’s like heheheeh suki time
KAJDJAJDJJSKDJF
zuko’s hopeful that you’re here or at least alive
after sokka and suki have their lil reunion zuko wanders off and asks around
“do you have a prisoner by the name of m/n?”
“why do you ask, newbie?”
“uhhh the warden sent me to him.”
“oh. there.” pointing to a door
zuko has to CONTAIN the excitement and nods before speed walking off
he throws open that door so quickly
you on the other hand is ready to rumble “i TOLD YOU I DONT FUCKING HAVE IT”
zuko just closes the door behind him and takes off his helmet
you’re like hol up wait wait zuko????
and he nods with a big ol grin on his face
you just hug him so fucking tight
maybe there were some tears shed
you pick him up and twirl him around
zuko’s like holy SHIT
and you pull back to just look at him
“you’re still as handsome as i remember you, zu.”
“so are you, n/n...”
he’s just so awestruck
the person he has been looking forward to seeing for 3/4 years is right infront of him
yall just kiss
sokka now gotta pull a zuko and bang on that door
“yALL DOING THINGS IN THERE??? HURRY UP”
“shut UP sokka”
zuko puts his helmet back on and grabs your hand
yall finally dip and are otw tf outta there
“oh shit zuko he’s cute”
“back off”
“im happy with suki relax sir”
zuko is clingy and was hugging you the whole time
not that you minded bc you missed him dearly
when yall got back and he introduces you
the group minus toph is like “ZUKO’S GAY????”
toph is like “I FUCKING CALLED IT”
alls well
except for the fact zuko wouldnt let you go anywhere by yourself
#atla zuko#prince zuko#sokka would clown zuko 100%#zuko x reader#zuko x male reader#zuko x black reader#atla x black reader#atla x reader#avatar the last airbender x reader#avatar the last airbender
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a very bleak christmas
wolfstar fic /// one shot
word count ( 6.2k ITS LONG SORRY)
fluff, not much smut
this turned out awfully long IM SORRY😭 having that said i hope you enjoy <33 ily mwahh
"you ready wormy?" james said, shutting his trunk and looking at his bed and around the dormitory to make sure hasnt forgotten anything. he looked over at the shorter boy with sandy coloured hair who was bending down apparently trying to get something he dropped from under the bed, but struggling a great deal. he nervously shot his head up giving james a weak smile and said "yes, im ready, i just dropped something here im not sure what-"
"just tell moony to fetch it for you while we're away" james said and peter just agreed and left the dormitory trailing after james with his trunk, shutting the door on his way. the gryffindor common room was emptier than usual, but the fireplace was lit with a couple of people huddling around it to shield themselves from the ruthless cold of december. despite this however, peoples spirits were as light as ever as almost everyone was departing for two weeks to spend christmas with their families, even lily evans stopped rolling her eyes every time james breathed, and started spending more time with him and ( to james' great delight) enjoying his company. speaking of lily, she was standing by the fireplace with her hair up in a ponytail with a furry winter cap on her head. james noticed her at once and made his way down the flight of stairs and tapped her shoulder softly, she turned around and gave him a warm smile, a short hug followed.
"happy holidays james!" she smiled so widely it watered james' eye. she called him james, not potter.
"happy holidays" he managed to respond, taken aback by the sudden affection she just showed him. she looked around furrowing her brows slightly then spoke, "wheres your trunk? have you not packed?"
"oh no i have! i left my trunk with peter to um, you know, come and say hi" he said the second part of the sentence quietly, she let out a soft laugh, god he just wanted to kiss her so bad. "wheres yours?" he asked quickly. she turned around slightly to show him her trunk which was standing behind her, tapping it twice.
"alright then, lets go down to breakfast, minnie wouldnt want us to be late" he told her, taking her hand and leading her out of the common room with him. he looked back at peter who was struggling with his own trunk and james' but peter just shot him a thumbs up as if he got everything under control.
"alright wormy, dont be late" he muttered. the pair of them walked down from the gryffindor tower to the entrance hall and right to the great hall where elaborate christmas decorations were encapsulating the place, giving the entire castle a more homey vibe. the four house tables were emptier than usual, james and lily made their way to the gryffindor table where they were met by a handsome boy with long hair that he managed to scruff in a very messy pony tail, and a taller boy sitting across him who seemed to find his buttering his toast to be a very intriguing activity. lily and james took seats next to them.
"morning" sirius spoke, looking at lily then at james.
"morning sirius, how are you" lily replied, who also began buttering her toast. sirius didnt respond right away, instead he eyed her then finally spoke, "oh im, im very good" it didnt really seem like it, sirius didnt seem to be in his loud, arrogant and flirtatious mood today, instead a rather dull and quiet one. lily looked at james silently trying to understand what had caused the sudden change in sirius behavior, she was met a mere shrug from james. the four of them sat in silence for the next ten minutes, no one breaking silence that seemed to have swallowed them. remus then looked up for the first time and sighed loudly, which made sirius look very attentively at him, waiting for him to say anything.
"im gonna go, im in the dorm if you want me pads. enjoy your holidays james, you too lily" he said lowly, also clearly in a dull mood in contrast to everyones mood right now. he got up and left, shooting them a weak smile before disappearing out of the great hall.
sirius watched him so closely even when he had gotten out of sight. it was common knowledge that the pair are in love and clearly fancied each other, almost everyone in school knew that. maybe its because of sirius' shameless attitude, cuddling with remus in the common room, sitting on his lap in the middle of the great hall, or pushing remus against a wall and just stand in front of him doing god knows what. the only problem was... neither sirius nor remus knew they liked each other. they obviously knew they had a different relationship than anyone else but they were so oblivious to the fact that theyre in love that it sometimes made james just want to scream it in their face.
"you okay pads?" james said mockingly, sirius had been staring at where remus left for at least ten minutes completely transfixed, he came back to his senses at once and looking abruptly between james and lily then back at his doughnut, fiddling with it slightly. he then shot james an alarmed look and said, "dont call me that james". he spoke so firmly, he knew james knew this is what remus calls him. no one was really allowed to use that nickname with him, even he and james who had a light hearted friendship that was basically based on jokes and pranks, sirius pronounced the words looking into james' eyes, which made james know he was being one hundred percent serious. james didnt respond, feeling a rush of guilt in his stomach, he just took a bite of his oatmeal.
"how are things with you two" james asked. sirius once again didnt respond right away but instead took time to ponder his answer.
"what do you mean how are things"
"you know, have you guys had a row or anything?" james asked, stuffing more oatmeal in his mouth.
"oh- um yea no. not really no" sirius hesitated a bit. the truth is that remus and him didnt have a row, but today was one of these occasions where sirius woke up finding himself on remus' bed not knowing how or why. it had happened a couple of times before and when it did, remus would immediately smile warmly at sirius and pamper him with kisses here and there on his cheek and his jaw. however, today, remus woke up a bit more shaky to the fact that he was in the same bed as sirius. he straightened his pyjamas quickly giving sirius an awkward smile and leaving without a word.
james dropped his oatmeal and looked at sirius looking serious for the first time, giving him a smile that carried something between sympathy and support.
"are you ever going to tell him?"
"tell him what" sirius said bluntly
james smirked. even lily suppressed a knowing look. sirius rolled his eyes.
"you guys are not onto that bullshit the whole school talks about right?" he asked cringing slightly.
"if the bullshit includes you and remus being blindly in love then yes" james gave a small laugh.
"literally blindly" lily mumbled, but sirius heard her and gave her a look.
"guys- hes my best mate"
"doing a lot of canoodling with your 'best mate' ?" james smirked rolling his eyes.
"first of all, what the fuck is canoodling james, this isnt the eighteenth century" he ppinted out the weird choice of wording.
"whatever, point is, people dont sleep on their 'best mates' chests every day padfoot" sirius opened his mouth to protest but james cut him again "just save your breath will you. im trying to help"
sirius sighed heavily burying his head in his hands and shaking it.
"i dont fucking know what to do prongs. fuck ugh i hate this so much why cant it be simpler" sirius' voice got weaker.
"mate just talk to him, remus cant read your mind. and its pretty obvious the feelings mutual" james tried to convince him.
"i dont know if hes into- you know, into me" sirius tried to explain. sirius had come out to the entire school three years ago so it was common knowledge that was gay.
"oh he is" lily said
sirius blinked.
"i mean, i spend a lot of time with him in our prefects meetings and in the library and stuff" she explained. sirius blinked again.
"i mean" she began again, "he talks about you an awful lot and seems to be quite fond of you" she smiled.
"look, you'll never know if you dont ask" james said again. "look at me, i had to ask lily out at least fifteen times-"
"james what the fuck this isnt the same, why are you even comparing it" sirius interrupted
"oh of course its not the same, but communication is key, no matter what the relationship is"
"yea and when i ask him out and he just says i misunderstood all his soft affectionate gestures, then stops hanging out with me because im gay and he would know i have feelings for him, that clearly arent mutual. i'll just ruin everything, and i'll lose probably the only person that likes me in this lousy world" sirius spilled, laughing bitterly.
"sirius! you know remus would never stop hanging out with you because of that, you know it!" james said, his voice getting a bit louder.
"yea but it'd be a sticky situation when your gay friend has feelings for you" sirius said, his eyes filled with tears that he wiped right away hoping james and lily didnt see that.
"sirius.." lily said lowly
"lily can you please check up on peter and help him if needs any assistance" james told her firmly, she didnt need telling twice, knowing he wanted to be left alone with sirius. she made her way out of the great hall until she was out of sight, then james look at sirius again who had his head buried in his hands once again.
"sirius i dont know whats gotten into you today, but you know damn well that neither moony or i would ever think of you any differently because you're gay. stop saying that as if its something that hinders you" this was one of the rare occasions where james was serious and firm. he wanted sirius to know meant every word that left his mouth. at this moment he heard a sniff followed by a weak sob.
"james, i sometimes wish i wanst- wasnt, you know, gay" he managed to say between sobs. james' face fell suddenly.
"no dont say that. please dont say that, you know we love you the way you are and we dont give two damns if you're gay or not" james got up and made his way across the table to sit next to sirius rather than in front of him.
"you're me best mate, i dont like seeing you like this. i love you a lot sirius and nothing your little overthinking brain comes up with could change that" he said, pulling sirius into a hug, so hard that he mightve broken a few ribs. he wasnt gonna let go before sirius does, he could stay here all day until sirius was ready to let go. he heard strong sniffs and felt his chest going up and down. sirius broke the hug after a few minutes, looking a lot more content than he had a few minutes before. james gave him his usual cheeky smile.
"your fucking snout sirius" james laughed, picking up a handkerchief trying to clean his shoulder.
"fuck off" sirius managed to laugh, sniffing again.
"thank you" sirius said quietly
"come off it, dont thank me" james smiled at him. he watched him grab a cigarette and right when he was about to light it with the tip of his wand james stopped him hesitantly. james never really liked to mother him about smoking or give him lectures about the effects smoking had, but he noticed sirius was eating less and smoking more the past couple of days. sirius shot a "what-do-you-want" look to which james responded, "um, can you please just eat something before you smoke" james said. he knew this was a touchy subject, he never liked to mention it but they were alone and he knows he's the only one sirius would listen to. sirius gave him a hesitant look, before stuffing the cigarette back in his pocket.
"just for you prongs" he rolled his eyes, taking a bite of his doughnut. james however was filled with so much joy seeing his best friend do that just for him.
"what are you smiling so much at you prat" sirius said between bites. james shook his head softly before saying, "im very proud of you sirius, i hope you know that" sirius smiled and laughed dismissively at that statement, james knew it touched him but sirius never really knew how to respond to affectionate words.
"you're very sappy you know that" sirius laughed slightly.
"whatever" james felt his cheeks go red. "anyway i have to get going before i get minnie mad on christmas" he said, getting up, swinging his backpack on his back leaving the hall.
"tell moony i say merry christmas" james called, leaving the great hall also disappearing out of sight.
~
later that night, james and lily departed home to spend the upcoming weeks with their families to celebrate christmas, so did most of the school. as homey and welcoming as the school felt, everyone loved going back to their family, everyone except sirius. sirius was never fond of his family, he never had a good relationship with them and all they did was make him more miserable, he would take any chance to be away from them. sirius was sat in the library that was emptier than usual (but the ceiling was enchanted to fake snow) he was sitting with two giant books opened in front of him, yellowed by age. he looked over at the books, he hadnt read a single word despite being here for nearly an hour. he came here in an attempt to distract himself from the intensifying amount of nerves and stress, however, he was so lost in his thoughts that not even that gigantic book can save him from his exhausting overthinking. he sighed heavily, feeling the weight of the world on his shoulder, shutting the books that made a loud thud and put them back in their place. sirius swung his backpack on his back and left the library making his way to the gryffindor tower. he just wanted to sleep. yes, sleep, thats what he needed. he went through the fat lady's portrait and climbed up the stairs to his dormitory, finding remus sitting on his four poster bed completely engulfed by a book. remus shot his eyes up the second he heard sirius walking in and gave him a wordless smile, going back to his book. sirius' stomach did a funny lurch.
"i was starting to think youve forgotten your way around the castle" remus said, flipping the page of his book, still reading it. sirius looked at him nervously, not sure what he meant by that.
"what?" sirius asked, he was going to take his shirt off and get in his pyjamas but stopped abruptly. he didnt wanna make remus uncomfortable around him, especially after what happened this morning. they always had a very intimate relationship though, changing in front of each other was never a problem. remus suppressed a chuckle which made sirius look at him, unsure what he found comical in this very intense atmosphere.
"you can take your shirt off if you want sirius" remus said, still poured into his book.
"how can you even see me?" sirius couldnt stop himself. remus looked up from his book and gave him a is-that-even-a-question look. sirius slipped his undone tie, unbuttoning his buttons his fingers shaking horribly for a reason he didn't understand. he knew remus was looking in his book (not that he didnt want remus looking) but he still felt like all the worlds eyes are on him. a couple of awfully long minutes passed and sirius finally was in his pyjama and got into his bed under his blanket and stared absentmindedly into the wall. remus flipped the page once again, he hadnt read a word on the previous page. how could he? he was so preoccupied by sirius changing in front of him. remus did freak out when he found himself on the same bed as sirius this morning. he doesnt know why he freaked out the way he did, its not like its the first time. he knew that this had made sirius extremely self conscious the whole day, he was wearing a very dull look. he had to make up for his unexplainable actions, he cant stand seeing sirius this upset, especially if he was the reason hes feeling like that. he couldnt stand seeing him in such a bad mood on breakfast this morning that he had to dismiss himself early. but sirius' loss of his loud flirtatious attitude was what stirred the pot for remus. he didnt walk in the dorm and try to slip in bed with remus, or get a kiss from him, or remotely try draw any attention to hismelf from remus rather than that book in his hand, which was as un-sirius as one can get.
"why were you late?" remus asked sirius, knowing hes not asleep. sirius mumbled something inaudible from his bed that remus didnt catch onto. remus furrowed his brows slightly. he shut his book and put it on the bed side table, the sound he made when he shut his book made sirius shift in his bed to face remus who was staring back at him.
"where were you?" remus asked
"in the library" sirius said simply, avoiding any sarcasm or any joking around. remus face wore a surprised expression.
"oh- by your own will?" he said with a breathy laugh.
"yea" sirius replied
"what were you reading?" said remus, sounding excited. sirius didnt exactly know why he wad being interrogated by remus about his absence.
"um, i was just doing homework"
"oh, thats actually nice pads" remus smiled. sirius' stomach did another flip at the nickname. god this was so awkward and tense, sirius thought.
"sirius are you mad at me?" remus said, going straight to the point. every muscle in sirius' body went tense and completely still.
"no" sirius said bluntly.
"sure?"
"yea"
"okay. great then. um do you wanna come lay here with me?" remus offered, this was quiet foreign for remus as it was never him who initiated anything sexual or intimate. but he was willing to go out of his comfort zone for sirius. just for sirius.
"uh- sorry moony im really tired" it pained sirius to say these words, if he was being honest, he wanted nothing more than to lay in remus' chest right now and give him soft pecks and kiss his stupid plump lips.
"oh, okay" remus said lowly. "okay then" sirius wasnt sure what he meant by that tone, and before sirius has any other second to think about it, he felt his bed dip slightly and remus climbing on him, placing himself on top of sirius with his legs wide opened around his waist. sirius felt like all the oxygen in the world had escaped his lungs.
"tired, you said you are pads? want a little massage?" remus cooed softly. he leaned down on sirius' chest undoing his pyjama buttons revealing his tattooed chest.
"remus-" sirius tried to stop him. sirius promised himself he wasnt going to do anything like that with remus because he doesnt want to make him uncomfortable or possibly hate him more, however, this is different. its remus thats initiating it. it remus that did it.
"what pads?" remus continued cooing softly, completely stripping sirius of his shirt and attaching his lips on sirius' neck. at this exact moment, sirius moaned louder than he intended. he shifted slightly in his bed and put his hand through remus' hair. remus continued nibbling sirius' neck. he bit and licked at all the right spots, leaving a soft trail of kisses all over his neck and made his way up to his chin and on his lips, where he left a soft peck. sirius however pulled remus' head back towards him to kiss him properly, remus licked sirius' bottom lip which made sirius moan approvingly into the kiss. remus slipped his tongue in sirius' mouth and deepened the kiss, he felt sirius' hand wandering around his shoulder and slipped in his shirt to touch his bare skin.
"god this is so" remus moaned breaking the kiss only to attach his lips on his once again.
"remus-" sirius stopped him abruptly. remus looked down on sirius, his eyes mobing fast between his godly features, furrowing his brows slightly not understanding why sirius stopped him. did he make him uncomfortable? was sirius really not in the mood and remus overstepped a boundry? remus felt a horrible tingling feeling in his stomach as his brain raced between all the possibilities.
"remus im sorry- i cant do this" sirius said, as soon as the words left his mouth he felt horrible, reading the shocked and bewildered expression on remus face, he looked very hurt and unsure of himself.
"oh- fuck okay im sorry" remus said quickly, getting off sirius and leaving his bed, but sirius held his arm to immobilize him and not make him leave. they stared at each other for a few seconds that felt painfully long. both of them felt confused, upset with themselves and unsure of what to do or say next.
"can you please stay" sirius said quietly avoiding remus' eye. remus didnt respond which made sirius feel a horrible pit of nerves in his stomach.
"i- i don't understand. you just asked me to stop and told me you cant do this" remus spoke lowly with a soft rasp in his voice. sirius buried his head in his hand, he was on the brink of tears, he honestly didnt know what or how to explain his confusion to remus. how could he explain it or put it in cohesive words when he himself didn't understand.
"sirius please talk to me" remus said softly, holding sirius' hand
"rem i dont know how-"
"do you trust me?" remus cut him off.
"what- yes of course" sirius said sternly.
"then please tell me how you feel"
"how i feel about what?" sirius asked
"about doing this" remus tried to explain, sirius knew at once he was referring to all the sexual stuff they do.
"remus i love it. i enjoy it a lot, i sometimes just want the day to end only to get in bed with you. i- i dont know how to word my feelings because it's honestly just all a mess inside me" sirius spilled. this was the most he'd spoken all day. remus smiled at the last sentence. "what about you?" sirius asked, feeling the same horrible pit of nerves in his stomach increase. remus however smiled.
"i do things for you pads that id never do to anyone" he said, smiling more. he leaned closer to sirius' face and brushing a few strands of his hair out of his face. "but, if you feel unsure about this, we can stop and just be friends. i'd completely understand"
"no what the fuck moony" sirius said before he could stop himself, remus looked in his eyes. "no im unsure about your feelings to me, not about my feelings to you" he tried to explain.
"you think i dont like you?" remus asked quickly.
"well not exactly but im not sure how you feel towards me". at this, remus leaned down to kiss sirius lips a soft and tender kiss. he took his time to savor every bit of his mouth he could.
"maybe this would give you a good idea about how i feel about you" he smiled at him. "we're both exhausted, its best if we just go to sleep"
"right okay. can you sleep with me?" sirius asked, remus gave a breathy laugh at his sweet request.
"yes darling i can" he said with his usual rasp apparent, getting under the blanket and spooning sirius playing with his hair for the the next foreseeable hours until both of them were sleeping.
soft sun rays illuminated through the window of the gryffindor tower and on the entire hogwarts grounds. the translucent curtains that were in the dormitory were not doing any shielding from the sun rays whatsoever. it fell gently on the two boys that were sleeping together, tangled together, their bodies almost intertwining so perfectly with each other as if they were jigsaw pieces. sirius' head was on remus' chest, remus hugging sirius' body towards him and their legs just tangled. they looked so peaceful, their chests raising and going down every couple of seconds, it was all so perfect that one could confidently bet that even their heartbeats were in sync.
an owl came knocking its beak on the window above the bed theyre on, breaking the gentle yet majestically peaceful the state they were in. sirius shifted slightly in his sleep, opening his eyes to find uninvited sunlight penetrating right through his eyeballs. the owl made another knock on the window trying to grab their attention.
"fine okay" sirius said rasply, he got up sitting upright opening the window for that stupid owl that interrupted his sleep. the owl had two parcels tied on its leg. sirius untied them and the owl flew out at once.
"whos that from?" a raspy voice spoke he immediately knew it was remus.
"um, i think its" he turned the parcel around to see if there was any name, he smiled when he saw the senders name.
"yep, its from prongs" he said looking at remus who also smiled warmly.
"well, we'll open it later, lets just get up quickly now before we miss breakfast" he said, sitting up right and sliding his legs out of the bed. the two boys changed into their normal clothes. remus got into a hand knitted sweater and pants, sirius also got into a baggy sweatshirt and sloppily tied his hair up.
"pads is that mine?" remus smiled looking at the sweater sirius was wearing.
"maybe" sirius replied with a cheeky tone.
"course it is" remus rolled his eyes. "you literally have the biggest closet out of all of us, yet youre never wearing your shit" sirius gave him a weird look.
"not that i mind it darling" remus said softly, playing with sirius' hair slightly. they both left the dormitory and walked down to the common room with the intention to leave to the great hall, however they were met by a small table that was put in front of the fireplace with breakfast food laying on it. they looked at each other exchanging weird looks.
"there was no point of making you leave the common room only to go down and eat when its only you too in the whole school" professor mcgonagall's voice spoke. she was sitting on an armchair wearing her usual green dressing gown. "well anyway, im going down to have breakfast with the rest of the teachers. you two have a merry christmas" she smiled slightly and left the common room.
remus and sirius were just left there standing stupidly in front of the food table.
"well, i guess we're not leaving. sit down lets eat im starving" sirius said sitting himself down and starting to eat toast. they both ate until they were full and just laid on their armchairs to take their breath.
"wanna open the parcel prongs sent?" remus asked after ten minutes of silence.
"uhh sure" sirius said, getting the parcels, handing remus one box and he opened the other one. he tore the wrapping and opened it, a smile breaking on his face.
"he got me a wand polishing set. oh and look, he got me some hair bands" remus laughed a little. sirius put the hair bands in his wrist.
"what are you laughing at, i love it" sirius smiled "what did he get you?"
"he got me part six of 'crows or crowns'. its my favorite book and he knows i couldn't find that volume anywhere" remus' face wore a very big smile from that present. "oh and look! he got me a vest, it's beautiful"
"i'll be wearing that" sirius said at once
"of course darling you can wear it whenever"
"remus open my gift!" sirius said with so much excitement, remus held the huge box wondering what he has inside. he stared at sirius before opening it, unsure of what will meet him when he opens it. his suspicion grew larger when he was met by a cheeky smiling sirius.
"its not gonna blow up in my face right?" remus laughed a little
"only one way to find out" sirius shrugged
"oh god" remus joked. he opened the box and the first thing he saw was a big box inside labeled 'book polishing kit' remus' face fell with shock.
"sirius! sirius is this a book polishing kit? oh my god" he was gasping. sirius felt his cheeks burn by the fond expression on remus' face.
"holy shit pads where did you get this, these are so rare and expensive" he held it close to his face examining it with so much excitement.
"shhh its a gift" sirius was kind of embarrassed fora reason he doesnt know. "theres more stuff"
remus looked inside the box and laughed out loudly when he saw at least a doesnt bars of chocolate.
"what are you laughing at! this is the muggle chocolate you told me you like" sirius said flustered a little.
"yes yes i love it" remus smiled. "thank you"
sirius shrugged, not knowing what to say in situations like this.
"um, right open my gift" remus said looking nervous. remus' gift was something a little different and not very expected, he spent a lot of time thinking whether its a good idea or not. hes so nervous for sirius to see it, he felt his stomach lurch so badly he might vomit. he handed sirius an a4 piece of parchment that was folded into quarters. sirius gave him a confused yet excited look.
"are you giving me your transfiguration homework as a christmas gift moony" he joked.
"oh shut up and open it" every fibre in remus' body was screaming in anticipation and nerves. sirius unfolded the paper and read:
"dear sirius,
i am writing this in the dormitory for the fifteenth time at least. i thought so much about this and decided that its perfect. six years ago when i laid eyes on you for the first time, you had this aura that carried so much charm, something about your stupid gorgeous personality was so seductive and made me in complete lust for you. there aren't enough words in the english language to explain how you make me feel, nothing will come close to describing how i feel when you slip in bed with me every night, when i play with your hair, when i hear your heartbeats, when i hold your hand and stroke it with my thumb, when you kiss my scars, when you sit next to me in class sit there looking pretty doing nothing. i came to the conclusion that every little thing you do has me in utter awe. no one has ever made me feel like that, for a long time i was so confused as to why and how you could do that so effortlessly. i was confused about how i felt about you for so long, i was so confused about myself, and you helped me come to terms with who i am, by being so unapologetically you. at the end of a hard day you're always there to cheer me up, even in my darkest days, when nothing felt like it'll be okay ever again, you're always fucking here to change that. the number of times you've saved my life sirius, i couldnt tell you, by just merely being here. i figured that no matter what happens and no matter where life takes me, i want to always be with you. i never want to see that day i have to depart you, i dont ever see it coming because not even the strongest force from the gods above will make me leave you. im in love with you. im so fucking in love you idiot. im in love with the way you talk, the way you tie your hair, the way you dress, the way your eyes crease when you smile, your bark like laugh, your stupid jokes that i find funny unironically, your chirped nail polish... just in love with you. so sirius, this is me asking, do you want to be my boyfriend?"
sirius read the letters at least three times to make sure he wasnt missing anything, to make sure he was reading it correctly. was remus asking him out? was remus actually in love with him? none of this felt real. sirius felt like he's seeing stars in his vision, like he was going to pass out any second right now. he looked up at remus who was staring attentively on him and watching his every reaction. he met eyes with him and felt like all the worlds oxygen was being drained.
"so?" remus asked, his voice quivering.
"so?" he repeated as if this was a incredulous thing so say, " fuck yes i wanna be your boyfriend" sirius threw himself on remus on his armchair and splattered him with kissed everywhere he could reach.
"i never thought id be the lucky person to actually end up dating you" sirius breathed
"please, im the lucky one here" remus rolled his eyes.
"i mean hell yeah you are" sirius said sarcastically.
the pair of them spent the rest of the day sitting on the armchair cuddled up with the heat of each other, sharing soft intimate touches every now and then. they spent the whole day in peace and delicacy and made the most out of each other’s company. soon enough before they knew it, the holidays were over and students were returning to hogwarts for their second term.
“hi remus! hey sirius, good holiday? how are you two?” james showered them with questions enthusiastically when they saw him come in the gryffindor common room, he seemed to be in a cheerful mood.
“yea, great holiday” remus mumbled finding himself an armchair and sitting in it. the rest followed and sat on armchairs around him but sirius sat on his lap which remus scooted over a little to make space for him. james and lily looked at each other rolling their eyes playfully but happy that theyre on good terms, unlike the last time they saw them.
“what about you two? and you wormy? how was ur holiday” remus asked calmly, playing with sirius’ hair absentmindedly.
“great we had a great a time, i invited lily and wormy over, wormy couldnt make it though. but lily and i had fun, my parents liked her a lot” james smirked looking at her. “obviously they knew her because i always talked about her to them, but they’ve never really- woah WOAH” james’ speach was cut abruptly when he saw sirius attach his lips to remus’ and remus kissed him back fondly. they all exchanged shocked looks but they werent too shocked, they knew something was happening between the pair of them.
“woah guys” james laughed as they broke the kiss apart and giggled at their reaction.
“yea um, remus and i are dating” sirius said, lookinh flustered slightly. remus was still playing with his hair softly.
“does that mea we can go on double dates?” james said at once
“james potter i am not going on double dates with you and sirius thank you very much” lily said sarcastically.
“suit yourself, james and i are going on dates” sirius shrugged
“james and you are what-“ lily looked confused but cant help a laugh.
“thats right evans” sirius said in a dignified tone.
“dont you talk to my girlfriend like that black!” remus said at once. they all laughed at the sitiuation but lily said with a serious voice, “guys im so happy for you, youre finally together” she smiled wamrly. remus and sirius scooted closer next to each other smiling back at her.
“really proud of my mates” james said, trying to keep a serious tone but smirking at the same time.
#the marauders#incorrect wolfstar quotes#hp marauders#incorrect marauders quotes#marauders headcanon#marauders era#sirius orion black#siriusxremus#sirius x remus#remus lupin#sirius black#padfoot#moony padfoot and prongs#wolfstar#wolfstar fic#wolfstar one shot#james potter#lily evans#prongs#jily
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SERIOUS RISE OF THE TITANS SPOILERS
BUT I NEED TO RANT
SPOILERS ARE UNDER THE CUT I PROMISE
I STARTED ROTT TEN MINUTES AFTER IT CAME OUT AT 5:01 PM AEST AND FINISHED ROTT AT ROUGHLY 10 TO 7
I FINISHED THE MOVIE AND SAW 8 SPOILER POSTS WITHIN 2 MINUTES ON TUMBLR
PLEASE BE CONSIDERATE OF OTHERS AND PUT ALL SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT FOR YOUR POSTS AND TAG THEM PROPERLY
FIRST OFF
Everyone who said Blinky would die because of"and blinky" in the trailer
Fuck you
It was very fair but still I was so scared
Same to if those who said Archie died because he wasn't in the trailer
Again fair but I was terrified and anxious as hell
My heart could not have handled if he died or Douxie's grief but I'm still upset about what actually happened
And I wish Zoe showed up so they could give her some characterization
We find out she's known Douxie and been friends with him for over 900 years but she doesn't help with the Arcane Order?
And none of the hedge witches show up to help fight them to defend their home?!?!?!
SECOND!!! THE TRAIN SCENE!!!
YES
LOVED IT
GREAT
Jim you stupid string bean, I love you though
Claire, good job, that was some hard magic
Toby, go duke!
Douxie my husband, YAAASS QUEEN, GET IT BABY
The Police Station
It was so funny
Everything about it I loved
Douxari confusing the officers and being neutrally chaotic
Claire trying to be tough and silent
Toby spilling ALL the tea and the officers not believing him
Archie just being Archie and enjoying the confusion of the humans
KREL SHOWING UP WITH RICKY AND LUCY
YES
OMFG
Keep casually listing just about every spy agency in order
and then just
"And your mum"
What a legend
Literal King 👑
Honestly
Walter and Barbara
Them being engaged and happy
Y E S
Jim being best man
Y E S
Walter DYING before they could get married
N O
H E L L N O
ELI GREW UP!!!!!
MPREG STEVE
Very unpopular opinion
I loved it, so fucking funny
I don't even like mpreg normally
But I loved it as a random side plot cause they probably couldn't find an import part for every character and still give them their deserved screen time
Also, funny!
Krel was way too smug explaining to Steve that he would be pregnant, not Aja
You know how we as a fandom have all decided Krel is Aro/Ace icon or at least Aro spec and/or grey ace (something like that) I have no problem with this and love it, it makes me feel very validated, but what Krel just doesn't want kids and decided it's easier to not have romantic relationships, that's also a legitimate thing a lot of woman do
Does that mean gay guys can have biological kids on Akiridion 5?
BACK TO STEVE
I wish there was a bit where Steve called Lawrence on the phone calling him "dad" or "coach dad" and being like "Hey, I know you're probably busy, you're at school but I'm seriously freaking out and I need your help or advice" and explaining the whole Akiridion pregnancy and Coach just reassuring him gently and telling him that he and Steve's mum would support him and he wasn't alone and they weren't mad at him.
Douxie figuring out the sigil
Good job baby! Smart boy! I am very proud
You very smart
The Order bringing the Titans with Nari mind controlled
😬
That's all
Numora dying
Why! It's was so unnecessary!
I don't necessarily love her by any means
But still!
Dndndbebhsvehehrdidjbdisbeurbvtisjbsgsneosbsyneyjsosnsjdbdynsvsidbfindbzhndhdushdhushdbudhnm
*key spams in frustration*
This began much irritation that just increased
THE BRIDGE
ARCHIE LEFT DOUXIE HIS LONG LIFE FRIEND AND PLATONIC SOULMATE (NOBODY CAN CONVINCE ME THAT NOT JOW FAMILIARS WORK IDC)
YES HE WAS STAYING WITH HIS DAD AND I RESPECT THAT
BUT GODDAMN IT CHARLIE
CHARLEMAGNE COULD HAVE JUST LIT THE TROLLS FOLLOWING THEM ON FIRE AND THEN FLOWN OUT
THE PORTAL WOULD HAVE CLOSED AT THE SAME TIME
OR THEY COULD HAVE FREED THE TROLLS
EITHER WAY
THEY COULD HAVE GOTTEN OUT
WTF HAPPENED THE WHOLE FOUND FAMILY THING THEH WERE PUSHING IN WIZARDS
WHY PUSH A GRIEVING DOUXIE TO ESSENTIALLY GET OVER IT AND ACCEPT ARCHIE AS HIS FAMILY CUZ HE WAS ALWAYS THERE JUST TO GET RID OF ARCHIE ANYWAY
DOUXIE WOULD HAVE NEVER SEEN HIM AGAIN
HE WOULD HAVE JUST SEEN "TELL DOUXIE I SAID GOODBYE" IN THE KRONOSPHERE AS HIS LAST MEMORY OF HIM
*INCREASING FRUSTRATION*
"No More Running"DOUXIE ALMOST DIED BRINGING NARI BACK
I KNEW HE WOULDNT DIE BUT I WAS STILL SCARED
I was sad
NARI AND SKRAEL'S BATTLE WAS PERFECT
CINEMATIC MASTERPIECE I WAS NOT PLEASED WITH NARI DYING
NOR DOUXIE BEING HELD BACK ONCE AGAIN FROM SAVING A LOVED ONE
"Nor more running"
Simple line
Sweet
Shattered me and my very being THE SWITCHING SPELL
AMAZING.YES.ILOVEDIT.
DOUXIE YOU SMART BRILLIANT BOY I AM SO FUCKING PROUD
Douxari was so chaotic and funny and pure in a very weird way
I was sad that THAT screenshot of Douxie and Archie wasn't actually Archie because he looked so happy chddling his familiar but it was still cute
Narxie was so fucking sarcastic when the Arcane Order realized the spell didn't work and I live for it
Walter and Barbara
Them being engaged and happy
Y E S
Jim being best man
Y E S
Walter DYING before they could get married
N O
H E L L N O
ELI GREW UP!!!!!
MPREG STEVE
I loved it, so fucking funny
Krel was way too smug explaining to Steve that he would be pregnant, not Aja
You know how we as a fandom have all decided Krel is Aro/Ace icon or at least Aro spec and/or grey ace (something like that) I have no problem with this and love it, it makes me feel very validated, but what Krel just doesn't want kids and decided it's easier to not have romantic relationships, that's also a legitimate thing a lot of woman do
Does that mean gay guys can have biological kids on Akiridion 5?
BACK TO STEVE
I wish there was a bit where Steve called Lawrence on the phone calling him "dad" or "coach dad" and being like "Hey, I know you're probably busy, you're at school but I'm seriously freaking out and I need your help or advice" and explaining the whole Akiridion pregnancy and Coach just reassuring him gently and telling him that he and Steve's mum would support him and he wasn't alone and they weren't mad at him.
Douxie figuring out the sigil
Good job baby! Smart boy! I am very proud
You very smart
The Order bringing the Titans with Nari mind controlled
😬
That's all
Numora dying
Why! It's was so unnecessary!
Dndndbebhsve hehr didjbdisbeurbvtisjbsgsneosbsyneyjsosnsjdbdynsvsidbfindbzhndhdushdhushdbud
*key spams in frustration*
THE BRIDGE
ARCHIE LEFT DOUXIE HIS LONG LIFE FRIEND AND PLATONIC SOULMATE (NOBODY CAN CONVINCE ME THAT NOT JOW FAMILIARS WORK IDC)
YES HE WAS STAYING WITH HIS DAD AND I RESPECT THAT
BUT GODDAMN IT CHARLIE
CHARLEMAGNE COULD HAVE JUST LIT THE TROLLS FOLLOWING THEM ON FIRE AND THEN FLOWN OUT
THE PORTAL WOULD HAVE CLOSED AT THE SAME TIME
OR THEY COULD HAVE FREED THE TROLLS
EITHER WAY
THEY COULD HAVE GOTTEN OUT
Titan Nari
I was so scared when Douxie nearly passes out from lack of oxygen trying to save her
Claire did a great job and I like her but I feel like they're overpowering her without developing her
Nari and Skrael's battle was a cinematic masterpiece
Coach Lawrence seriously needs a break
NARI DYING WAS UNACCEPTABLE
DOUXIE BEING HELD BACK FROM HELPING HER WAS UNACCEPTABLE
"No more running" destroyed me
I AM STILL NOT OK
I DON'T THINK I EVER WILL BE
The 9th configuration
FOUND. FAMILY. CENTRAL.
I'M THE CHOSEN ONE BUT I CAN'T DO IT ALONE
YES
The Final Battle
I don't even know what to say
Aja. QUEEN.
RIP Varvatos
Rip Douxie that fall would have really fucking hurt
He definitely had broken ribs from that
I'm surprised he could walk after even while being supported against someone else to stand
Jim should have just stabbed Bellroc instead of talking
Jim should not have been able to walk and run perfectly fine after being stabbed even with all the adrenaline
Toby WTF MAN
GOOD JOB BUT FUCKING HELL
I LEGIT CAN'T EVEN FIGURE OUT HOW IT HAPPENED
THE MOVIE CAME OUT 4 DAYS AGO (IT TOOK ME FOREVER TO WRITE THE RANT DONT JUDGE) AND I'VE WATCHED IT 5 TIMES AND I STILL DON'T KNOW HOW I MISSED IT EACH TIME
HOW DID TOBY CRASH?!?!
ANYWAY
TOBY DYING WAS NOT ACCEPTABLE
JIM SCREAMING OUT HIS NAME AS SOON AS HE REALIZED TOBY WASNT THERE
BLINKY AND ARGH LOOK OF PANIC AND WORRY CUZ THEY REALIZED TOBY DIDNT COME BACK WITH JIM
DOUXIE REALIZING HE FAILED TO PROTECT SOMEONE ELSE IMPORTANT TO HIM (EVEN IF HE DOESNT HAVE MUCH OF AN ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIP WITH TOBY, I REFUSE TO BELIEVE HE DIDN'T ADOPT THEM ALL AS HIS YOUNGER SIBLINGS)
"Always was, always will be" hurt my entire soul
The Time stone
This frustrated me so much it took me 3 days to write just this bit
Go back in time and save everyone?
Yes! Awesome!
Go back to the start the start
No
Also, I love and adore Toby
BUT IT MAKES NO SENSE
JIM GIVING THE AMULET AND RESPONSIBILITIES AWAY WHEN HE HAS 2 YEARS OF EXPERIENCE AND KNOWS ALL OF HIS MISTAKES AND HOW TO FIX THEM
WTF
AS I SAID I LOVE TOBY AND I LIKE HIM ACHIEVING STUFF
BUT HES NOT TREATED AS BADLY AS THE FANDOM ACTS LIKE HE IS
AND LOGICALLY JIM MADE A STUPID DECISION CONSIDERING WHAT HE KNOWS
I get that he was tired of being the trollhunter
Largely because he was tired of not thinking he would do a good enough job
But odds are Toby will make some of the same mistakes and they'll be right back in that same position except maybe Claire will die that time around
And if you're sick of the trauma and responsibility of it than why would you dump it on your best friend
Once again I say, it was an illogical and dumb decision
I WILL BE RUNNING TO FANFICTIONS TO ESCAPE THIS CANON
#toa spoilers#rott spoilers#trollhunters rott#movie rant#toa#toa archie#toa wizards#toawizards#toa rott#toa zoe#douxie#hisirdoux casperan#douxie casperan#toa douxie#toa nari#toby domzalski#claire nuñez#jim lake jr#stricklake#walter strickler#barbara lake#nari of the eternal forest
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Jisung
Pairing - Jisung x chubby*Reader
Genre - Fluff
Warning - Suggestive content, insecurities
A/N - Soo this is a Jisung timestamp but this is done differently than how most do their timestamps also the Jisung in this is different than “usual” Jisung just to let y’all know. He’s getting older so I feel as if the content in here is not that bad and if any of you have problems with Jisung being a regular teenage boy with hormones then oh fucking well. If you want to keep seeing him as a child then this is not for you.
W. Count - I don’t really know I didn’t look this time but ik it’s longer than I intended
5:30
As you laid sideways across your bed trying to find the perfect position. You heard your mom in the kitchen cooking what you hope is dinner. Your stomach wailing as soon as the thought crosses your mind. ‘Ah I found it’ you think as the immediate comfort of the perfect laying spot begins to set deep within your body.
You take a look at your phone and start back reading your story that was shining on the screen. It was starting to escalate as the currently featured side gay couple finally stopped lying to themselves and admittedly jumped each others bones. You feel the little tingle start in the pit of your stomach, it was just getting good when a message came through.
Jisungpwark 💚💚😗🤤🥰🤪:
BABEEEEE
AHHHH
IM BOREDD
Come play mario kart with me
You:
UGGHHH
But I just found the perfect laying spot
And my mom’s cooking dinner
Tell me why I should get up and come over? what’s in it for me
Jisungpwark 💚💚😗🤤🥰🤪:
Maybe because you love me and dont wanna see me
suffer from boredom
You:
Do I really love you that much though?
That’s the question of the hour
Jisungpwark 💚💚😗🤤🥰🤪:
First off that hurt
Second of course you love me or else you wouldnt be
dating me for 7 years now
You:
You forget about that time we broke up in fifth
grade
Jisungpwark 💚💚😗🤤🥰🤪:
That was for ONE DAY ok
If you come over I promise to let you win at mario kart
“What the hell?” you exclaimed slightly outraged at the bullshit he just sent to your phone. Sitting up you feel the competitiveness start to spike. “Did he really just challenge me like that?”
You get out of bed and start to put your shoes on, “He knows damn well that I can beat his ass without him ‘letting me win.’”
You:
Stop fucking lying whore you know damn well I can
beat your ass I mario kart
See now I have to come over and whoop you at your
own video game
I’ll be over in 10
Part of you knows Jisung said that on purpose but that didn’t stop you from taking the bait still.
Walking out of your room you go into the kitchen and see your mother almost done with dinner, the sweet aroma of the food has your mouth watering, stopping for a second you ponder if you should really go play mario kart.
“Hey sweets, dinner is almost ready.” your mother turns to you and smiles, taking in your jacket and shoes and she looks at you questiongly.
Walking around to your mom you give her a hug and a kiss on the cheek as you grab your car keys that sit behind her. “Hey I came to let you know that I was gonna head over to Jisung’s for a little to beat him at mario kart. He threatened me so I have to show him what’s up.” Hearing your statement, one that she has heard before, your mother laughs and gives you an ok before she recommends just staying the night, knowing that you won’t be back anytime soon.
Thinking about it you go and pack a bag. Going towards the front door you’re about to step out when your mom calls you back in the kitchen to which you see her sitting at the table with a plate of food as she slides a container with enough for both you and Jisung. “Thank you mama.” you say smiling so wide that it almost hurt, feeling happy that you get to eat some of f/f(favorite food).
“You’re welcome sweets. Oh and before I forget, be safe.”
You left out a huff of air telling your mother that you will be careful driving so she has nothing to worry about.
In a sing-song voice she goes,“That’s not what I meant.” As you open your mouth to ask what she meant she cuts you off by sliding something across the table.
“Mom...what is that. ‘Please don’t let it be what I think it is.’ But as you read the box your fears are confirmed. It is condoms. “Mom what the- EW mom no it’s not, we’re not-” she cuts you off with a raised hand.
“Sweetie you’re not in trouble. I know you and Jisung have been together for a very long time, and I trust and love you both. But you’re of the age where you do things like that and you may not feel comfortable telling me, but love safe sex is nothing to be ashame-”
Never having been this flustered in your life you frantically tried to get her to stop,“MOM. I…” Fidgeting with your hands you start to awkwardly look around the kitchen as if it was the first time you had ever seen it. “...We don’t do those types of things.”
“Ok darling, but you never know what might happen.” She states with the smuggest look on her face, winking as she hands you four condoms. “I’m not endorsing it but I know that if you want to do it then there’s nothing I could do to stop you so take these. Also you might want to go ahead and get to his house, your phone has been buzzing for a while now.” She states whilst she started to eat the food that was on her plate.
You couldn’t get out of that house quick enough, seeing as how you almost fell walking out of the door. Settling down in the car you release the biggest cringe you’ve ever had in your life. “AHHH ew what the fuck was that!” you exclaim feeling the condoms that burned in your pockets, as if they were trying to set your pants on fire so that they could get put to good use.
Finally calming down your phone buzzes with another message from Jisung. You see that he’s left various messages questioning where you are or what's taking so long. Some stating that you must be dead. You shake your head at your silly boyfriend as you reply to his many messages. With a light sigh you put the key in the ignition and back out of your driveway.
It was then that you started to look back at you and Jisung’s relationship. You guys started dating in fifth grade when you both got dared to spend seven minutes in heaven at you guys long time friend, Jeongin’s, birthday party. He still holds the fact that the only reason you too got together was because of him, but ever since then you and Jisung have been going strong.
Except for that one day in fifth grade when you guys broke up a week after you had gotten together because Mina Jameson had convinced you that Jisung would never want a ‘bludder whale’ like you. Ha jokes on her she’s had five STD’s this year alone and at least two pregnancy scares and she didn’t even know how to say blubber so who’s on top now.
Ever since you were a child you’ve always been bigger than most girls and it did make you feel insecure for a very long time, but if it wasn’t for Jisung who reassured you and showered you with as much love as he could every time you slipped you don’t know what life would be like.
You loved him with everything you had.
You and Jisung had never gone past small makeouts. They barely even involved tongue, there’s no way that things would just escalate tonight out of basically nowhere. Right?
Yea. Anyways Jisung is too shy for that even though sometimes he could be a cheeky asshole and I don’t know if I’m ready.
Seeing that you’ve made it to Jisung’s house you take a look at the time and see that it had been almost two hours as it was 6:45. Damn, well at least I brought food.
You greeted your soft looking boyfriend clad in a hoodie that is slightly big on him and Nike joggers, he almost tackled you to the ground when he saw the food in your hands. When he asked what took so long you just told him it was the food. You guys ate the food that your mom gave you and started playing mario kart.
8:23
After about 15 rematches most of which you won Jisung’s mom called him into the living room. She had an emergency at work and she wanted him to know that she wouldn’t be back till tomorrow.
“So babe, what are we gonna do now? We could watch a movie or...” Jisung whispered, trailing off as he got in bed next to you and started to survey every inch of your face. It felt as if he was looking into your soul. You felt like he could see every single flaw on your face and you did not like it. As soon as he started leaning in moving his hand to your pillowy waist your mind flashed to the conversation you had with your mother.
‘Is this it? Does he want to do it?’ Overwhelming thoughts started to cloud your mind and pretty soon you found yourself jerking back once you felt the tip of his nose touch yours. The sound of the sheets moving filled the room as you stood up off of the bed.
“Uhh it’s getting late, A movie sounds nice I think I’m just gonna go shower right quick and we can watch the movie when I get out, ok?” You state as you quickly gather your shorts that you brought and a hoodie out of Jisung’s closet, and rush into his en suite bathroom almost slamming the door behind you.
Turning on the shower to make sure he didn’t hear you, you immediately start to whisper shout, “Ah! What the fuck was that, who the fuck was that and what did he do with my boyfriend. Jisung has never been like that before.” Tying your hair up you hop in the shower feeling the water pelt your skin as you decided to forget about it, but you couldn’t deny the twinge you felt in your stomach every time you thought about how he looked when he stared at you like that.
9:34
The movie was boring so you guys decided to play games again. Only for Jisung to see that he was about to lose against you in Mortal Kombat and in an effort to be a little bitch he tackled you. Now wrestling you yell at him in mock anger for ruining the game before you could kick his head off. As you flipped the both of you over so that you were on top you started to pettily slap his arm.
“Ahh Park Jisung you dick! I almost won why’d you do tha-” You had gotten too comfortable and loosed up your legs that were caging him in and he was able to flip you mid sentence. It was then you noticed what a compromising position you both were in, it looked somewhat akin to the basic missionary.
Letting out quickened breaths you started to heat up as Jisung stayed in between your legs. You could see the slight perspiration sort of dampen his hair. The game made a sound that surprised you a little causing you to sort of jerk your body. At that Jisung let out a groan that sounded like it was painful.
Your body alerts and you start to question him,“Jisung I’m sorry are you ok? What happened?” A ferocious blush starts to race across his cheeks. He avoids your eyes and tells you that it was nothing and that he’s fine.
“Jisung stop lying and would you let me up now, you’ve been laying on me for a while an-” Cool slightly wet lips touch yours. A little startled at first you tense up but then his lips start to move against yours and the tension in your body slowly unwinds till nothing is left but pure bliss. His lips slowly caress yours and this feels like nothing you’ve ever felt in your life. The passion and the want that he puts into kissing you has you going crazy.
Once a steady rhythm is set you move your lower body in an effort to get comfortable and Jisung groans again, and you immediately feel something against your leg and you get flustered because now you know why he groaned and you feel like an idiot for not figuring it out sooner.
Jisung wants more, more of you, more of this. The high that this is putting him on is euphoric and for now he doesn’t want to stop. He didn’t say anything but when you came out of his bathroom in his hoodie that fit just like a dress because of the height difference and the illusion that you had nothing on under got him so riled up that he almost couldn’t breathe. It was always like that when it came to you. He loved you so much that it was at most times suffocating. He slips his tongue out of his mouth and just barely grazes it against your bottom lip as if he was testing out the water temp in a pool.
You feel something wet against your lips realizing that it was Jisung’s tongue and you quickly almost embarrassingly so open your mouth to let him in. His tongue ventures farther into your mouth and for a little bit there you both are, in the middle of the floor in his room exploring each other, tasting each other, and it is as if there is no one or nothing in the world except for you two.
Soon enough without realizing Jisung starts to slowly grind his semi-erection right on to your heated core. The feeling was heavenly and neither of you wanted to stop.
He lifts off of your lips so that you both could breath but he soon started to kiss all over your neck, and you throw your head back and release a moan that sounded like heaven to his ears. Grabbing your soft plushy sides he starts to feel anywhere that he can and you tense up out of slight fear at what could be his reaction. He runs one hand down to your thigh, lifting it so that it’s placed on his hip softly squeezing while the other starts to make its way to the hem of your hoodie pulling it up slightly, and that’s when the thoughts came.
You quickly pushed Jisung off of you and sat up trying to pull the hoodie as far down your body that it could reach. You looked toward Jisung to see that he had a blush the color of a strawberry and his lips were swollen to look even more soft and inviting than normal. Standing up you rush to his bathroom and close the door leaving a severely confused and turned on Jisung on the floor.
Looking toward the mirror, multiple hickies are splattered across your neck and when you lift your hand to rub against them you jolt a little at how tender they were. You could also see where it looked as if you had taken a shot at the kylie jenner lip challenge. But that wasn’t where your mind was at, you were focused on what just happened out there. Thoughts of Jisung possibly seeing your chubby stomach riddled with stretch marks made immediate panic course through your veins.
You normally were so good with not thinking about things like that Jisung having helped you be able to get here, but now when he was on the precipice of Jisung seeing your body you couldn’t think about anything but the possible disgust at what you really looked like.
It’s not like you didn’t trust him or anything but when insecurity strikes it strikes hard. You consider telling Jisung about these feelings considering you always have in the past, but what if he feels as if you’re doubting his love for you and he gets mad.
You realize that you’ve probably been in the bathroom for a long time and you didn’t want Jisung to worry so you muster up the courage and with a determined release of air you open the door. Only to see that Jisung is not where you left him.
“I wonder where he’s at?” You speak into the air until you wonder what time it is and see that it’s 10:15. ‘WTF we were making out for that long’
Thirty minutes have passed and Jisung is still not back. As soon as you get up to go look for him he walks into the room.
“Where were you? You’ve been gone for a little over half an hour.”
Jisung looks at you and when he sees your truly confused face he shyly thwarts his eyes and lifts his hand to rub his neck at the realization that he’ll actually have to explain. But before he can you see his shy gaze and it clicks in your mind what he could’ve been doing regarding what you felt earlier. Biting the inside of your lip you tell him nevermind stating that you already know. He apologizes and says he had to do something because he didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.
11:00
The last fifteen minutes have been filled with an agonisingly awkward aura in the air. You and Jisung have been sitting up against the headboard of his bed staring at some movie on tv but you knew that neither of you were actually paying attention. Jisung’s warm hand slides toward yours and upon contact you jump up and away.
“Babe what’s wrong? You’ve been jumpy ever since what happened a while ago. Is everything ok? Did I do something wrong?” Jisung asks with slight guilt in his voice thinking he was the problem. You told him no but he didn’t believe and you kept trying to deny his accusations saying that you were just tired but he wouldn’t take that for an answer.
He grabbed your chin and sort of gently forced you to look at him and when you saw his warm eyes filled with nothing but love you had no choice but to break down and tell him.
Hot salty tears ran down your face and he took his thumb and used it to wipe your tears as you described what happened when he tried to go under the hoodie. You had to continuously reassure him that it was not his fault, but your own.
“I promise Jisung you did nothing wrong. I love you so much we’ve been through everything together. It’s my fault for feeling this way even when you constantly shower me with love. I just sometimes, I feel like you shouldn’t like me and when you tried to reach under my hoodie it’s just like I didn’t want my fears to come true once you see my body.”
“...Babe I- I don’t know how to approach this like I want you to know how much I truly love you. I honestly love your body so much but I don’t want you to think that's all though.” Jisung stated nervously mildly irritated at himself for not being able to properly express his feelings for you. Starting to think you honestly couldn’t believe why you didn’t trust him. He was your mouse, your tall boi, your marshmallow, your love, and possibly even your life.
“C’mere” Jisung stated in his deep soothing voice as he pulled you into his lap in a straddle position.
What Jisung didn’t know was that you loved whenever you got to sit in his lap, it made you feel giddy inside.
Jisung totally knew that you loved to sit in his lap.
“It’s ok, we don’t have to rush. If you don’t feel comfortable showing your body too me yet then that’s ok...One request though.” He states with a small smile and a single finger held in the air. “Can we at least keep making out like this because I’ve been holding myself back and after tonight I don’t think I can do that anymore.” He promptly flashes a slightly cocky smirk to which you answer with a smack on the arm earning a laugh from him.
Wondering why you even date him you give him a lingering kiss on the lips and snuggle into his chest.
“Y/n, I noticed that earlier when you were talking about what happened you called this hoodie yours. I just wanted you to- ACK stop choking me- AKKK.”
Although he was currently being choked he was happy, because he knew that you were ok.
#jisung#park jisung#jisung park#nct#nct dream#nct blog#nct fluff#jisung timestamps#jisung fluff#nct jisung#nct jisung fluff#suggestive#chubby#chubby reader#nctxchubbyreader#nct x chubby reader#nctxreader#nct x reader#MY STORIES
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Aristocats Au (Pt.2)
-------------------------
Patton awoke to the sound of singing, he ran his tail along the kittens bodies before slinking out of the basket.
Patton had never had the best hearing for a cat, but lucky for him, he could see the cat who was sounding off the noise.
He was large, with matted brown fur, there was a burn scar across one section of his face, his eyes were an odd honey yellow color. Patton smiled as the tom's eyes locked with his own, following his gaze to a nearby tree, laughing as cherry petals fell upon his fur.
"Abraham Delacy, Giuseppe Casey, Janus O'Malley, Janus, the alley cat, and I'm very proud of that," Janus said finally as he hopped down from the tree.
"Well monsieur, your name seems to cover all of your ups," Patton said with a laugh.
"And might I request yours?" Janus said, raising his head slightly with a smile.
"Patton," the smaller cat responded.
"Patton, beautiful. . ." Janus' eyes fell on his own.
"And your eyes- the shine like sapphires, radiant, and light," Janus said, circling Patton a few times and brushing his tail along his fur.
"You're quite the flirt, arent you Janus?" Patton responded.
"Well it's not every day a damsel like you shows up in my neck of the woods now is it?" Janus purred.
"Well I wouldnt know, I'm not from here," Patton said, now remembering their situation.
"Oh?" Janus' tone quickly switched to one of worry.
"Sanders Manor, I havent got a clue how far from it we are, though," Patton responded, tail swishing anxiously.
"Oh! You mean that big building in the fancy section of town!" Janus exclaimed, his ears perking back up again.
"That'd be the one," Patton said with another laugh.
"Oh I can get you there, we can fly over a paris on a magic carpet, just we two," Janus said, smiling at Patton.
And suddenly, Roman was sitting next to Patton.
"Three?"
Then Remus.
"Four?"
Then Logan.
"Five?,"
And then Virgil fell out of the basic with a thud.
"Six," Janus said, mildly astonished.
"I suppose you only had in mind a magic carpet, built for two?" Patton said sadly.
"I wouldnt take up much room," Roman said, looking between the two older cats.
"No no darlings, its alright, let's not bother Monsieur Janus, theres far to many of us to worry about," Patton said, ushering the kittens away with a flick of his tail.
Janus sat there for a few minutes, looking sullen. Until finally he decided to chase down the retreating cats.
"You know what? I promised a magic carpet, so magic carpet you'll get," Janus said as he reached them. He stopped short of a nearby road, trotting over and marking something in the dirt with his claws.
"And its gonna stop right here," Janus said as he moved away from the spot.
A few minutes later a car came rumbling up the road, Janus leapt out in front of it, jumping up onto the window and causing it to veer of course, allowing the other five cats to hop into the bed while the driver was distracted.
"Monsieur Janus! You could have lost your life!" Patton scolded.
"All in a days work for an alley cat," Janus replied. Patton held the kittens close as the truck started up again, watching as Janus began to shrink, still saying his goodbyes.
"Goodbye Monsieur Ja-" Roman's sentence was cut short as the ginger and white tabby was booted out of the truck bed. Quicker than Patton couldve hoped for, Janus had rushed over, picking the kitten up and placing him gently back in the truck, climbing up himself shortly after.
"Oh Roman you scared me half to death!" Patton said, circling the kitten with a worried gaze, checking for injuries.
"I didnt mean to do it," Roman said.
"Thank you again Monsieur Janus- we must seem like awful trouble for you hm?" Patton said.
"Oh come on Pattie I've seen worse, believe me," Janus said, checking over the other three kittens.
"Papa I'm hungry," Remus said with a groan, stretching the front of his body slightly.
"Oh really? Well I think I have a solution," Janus responded, slinking back to the front of the truck bed.
"All you have to do is close your eyes," the kittens followed the instruction.
"Wiggle your nose," they followed again.
"Rub your stomachs," and as the kittens finished the last step, Janus pulled a milk jug out from under a cloth. He and Patton sat together to keep watch on the kittens, so none fell in.
But of course, he'd failed to account for the rearview mirrors. The truck came to a screeching halt as the driver raced to the back and chased the cats back into the wilderness.
"My! What a horrible human!" Patton said as they reached an abandoned building, pressing his nose to each of his kitten's foreheads to calm them down.
"Well some humans are like that," Janus replied.
"Alright, theres train tracks up ahead, we'll follow those," Janus said, ushering the kittens into a line, with Patton following close behind.
"Virgil's the caboose!" Remus said from the front, letting out a laugh at the offended look on Virgil's face.
For a while the only sounds were the fake train being generated by both Remus and Logan, but soon they became all to realistic.
"Under the bridge! Quick!" The cats leapt onto a wooden plank under the tracks, holding the kittens closely.
Soon enough, the train had passed, only to replaced by a different sound.
"Papa papa!" Virgil had fallen into the river. Janus leapt down from the wood and into the river, while Patton ushered the other kittens to safety.
"Hold on Virgil!" He called, swimming as fast as he could. Virgil latched himself onto a nearby log, Janus pushing it towards the shore, before sinking under the water.
Patton waited anxiously at the bank before he saw Janus, leaning on the backs of two geese, being carried to the shore.
Janus let out a grumble and shook himself off when he reached the shore.
"Oh Monsieur Janus are you alright?" Patton said, rushing over to check on him.
"He stayed upright quite easily," said the goose with the pink bow around her neck.
"Sunk like a log at the end there though didnt he?" The black bowed goose said with a HoNk of laughter.
"Thank you for rescuing him for us," Patton said, laughing, earning a disappointed glare from Janus' direction.
"Well of course! It was the least we could do," said the pink-bow goose.
"Oh- we havent even exchanged names yet have we?" She continued.
"My name is Aphrodite Sable, and this is my sister, Adrestia Sable," Aphrodite said.
"We're twins! You might say we're related," Adrestia carried on. Patton laughed, Janus merely made a confused face as he left to check on the kittens.
"Your husband doesnt seem to have a sense of humor does he?" Adrestia said.
"Oh he's not my husband-" Patton said, the geese's facial expressions seemed to change, they leaned closer to each other and began whispering.
"Hes taking us back home! Court Avenue," Patton replied quickly.
"Oh how wonderful! We're heading that way as well, to meet our Aunt Melpomene," Aphrodite said.
"Do you think you could escort us?" Patton asked.
"Of course," the geese replied.
The octet continued on in a v-formation, Logan spouting facts about bird migrations as they went. Virgil had fallen asleep, and so Janus had decided to carry him on his back. Things picked up after their meeting with the geese's aunt, which had put Janus in a much better mood.
"Well, it's getting late, we should probably find a place to stay," Janus said, and they continued down an alley, Patton and Janus talking more and more, and Patton feeling much more distressed at the prospect of having to leave him once they got home.
----------------------------------------------
Tag list:
@just-a-gay-fae
@3-has-charm
@littlestr
@idkanameatall
@thefivecalls
@willowaudreykeyes
@pricklyfish777
@the-sad-strawberry
@extercs-experiences
@theonetruebeepboop
@mycatshuman
@teamplutoforlife
@melodiread
@meowthefluffy
@frawkeye
@cemmy
@nerosdayinhell
@thecolorfulolive
@frog-candy-bee
#cori writes#aristocats au#long post#ts patton#ts remus#ts janus#ts virgil#ts roman#ts logan#tw drowning#tw trains#tw cars#tw cats#moceit#romantic moceit
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mods are asleep post more gay drabbles it's the only flavor i can write
modern human au where L and Luigi are seperate people who have to deal with each other, and then they also have to deal with Dimentio. because that's the only other flavor i can write.
((will format correctly in the morning because fuck tumblr mobile))
~~~~~
L wasn't entirely certain when a street performer had set up a magic show in front of his mechanic shop, but it didn't seem to be driving away business, so for now he ignored it. For several weeks, actually, he did a stellar job of ignoring it.
The performer stopped him one day on his way into work, sauntered into his path before the crowd with a dazzling smile. He conjured a rose for L and offered it with a bow, the trick met with cheers and applause.
L scoffed and moved to step around the attention whore, but his path was blocked again. "Not one for flowers, then?" the shorter man sang. He pulled the scarf from his own neck, wrapped it around the delicate rose, and pulled it away with a flourish.
He now held a bouquet of rusty wrenches and screwdrivers wrapped in colorful paper.
L couldn't help it, he laughed, the whole crowd laughing and applauding as well. The man bowed again, and this time L accepted the gift, and he was at last allowed to go on his way.
He pulled the bouquet apart once he entered the shop--not excellent tools, gathered probably from the dump, but the gesture was still hilarious. Once L had unwrapped the paper, he found a card nestled among the tools. No number to call, no elaboration on the givers identity. Only a name.
"Dimentio"
L tried very hard not to hope Dimentio would be hanging around outside his shop again, but he couldn't help being glad to see the thin boy stood up on a box and talking excitedly to the crowd before him.
L elected to spare five minutes to be late for work and watch a couple of Dimentio's tricks. Dimentio smiled when he spotted him in the crowd, asked him to pick a card at one point and summoned it from a little girls knit cap. The girl was delighted, her mother twofold, and she let the little girl hand Dimentio a sizeable tip at the end of the show.
L was more than disappointed he couldn't spare the cash to at least tip Dimentio. He knew Luigi often liked to leave a parting gift for hard working performers that had made him smile, and Dimentio had done that two days in a row. Which was not an easy feat, given L's situation.
The thought pressed firmly at the back of his mind all day. Eventually, he decided to take an early lunch and bolted to catch Dimentio outside.
The performer was gathering tricks and props into a worn duffle bag by this hour, moving onto a different spot. L called out to him before he could go, and Dimentio seemed surprised to see him again.
"I'm afraid you've missed the encore," he teasingly replied, slinging his bag over his shoulder.
"Nah, I got enough of your flashy tricks, thanks," L returned. He jogged over to meet Dimentio on the corner, and it was more apparent without the box that Dimentio stood more than a full head shorter than him. It was also more apparent he wasn't wearing shoes.
L frowned down at the sidewalk, taking in the boys pale toes and wondering if he was okay. It wasn't the coldest of the year yet, but it was still far from warm.
Dimentio shifted in place, seemingly eager to get on. He smiled at L anyway. "To what do I owe the pleasure then?"
L ran a hand through his messy hair. He was never very good at this. "You eat yet?"
There was a laugh, and L smiled again. It was different than the stage laugh. Dimentio choked on it a little suddenly, and his voice cracked on the end of it. "Was than an invitation?"
L snorted and jerked his head over his shoulder, walking back towards his shop. He was thrilled that Dimentio followed him.
There wasn't much to the shop, but there was a small, worn couch tucked away in a tiny back room where L could retreat to relax and warm up a little. Dimentio left his pack at the door and happily settled onto the couch with his legs folded under him. L tried not to sit too close to him, but it was difficult to not squish in the small space.
L brewed hot coffee for them both and they shared the sack lunch L had brought for the day. He tried to get Dimentio to eat the whole sandwich, insisting he could make something later, but Dimentio refused to touch more than half of anything.
They sat and talked in the warm little nook for some time longer than they probably should have, but eventually Dimentio went on his way.
L didn't mean to go on and on to Luigi every time this happened afterwards, but eventually Luigi encouraged him to take enough food for L and Dimentio to both have a decent lunch. Gradually, their dates became routine enough that Dimentio swung by the shop even when he had been performing elsewhere that morning.
L didn't quite realize he had a crush until the afternoon the windchill picked up and he gave Dimentio an old coat. It swallowed him up, but he had thanked L sincerely, and stood on tiptoes to give L a kiss on the cheek before he left that day. L didn't want to admit he had spent the rest of the day finding his fingers softly touching the spot, but he did.
It was three dates after that when L finally worked up the nerve to scoot closer to Dimentio on the couch and kiss him fully. Dimentio was so quick to slide his arms around L and return the deep kiss. They wound up making out on the couch, and it wouldnt be the first time.
------
Luigi got to meet Dimentio three weeks after the first time L had invited him to lunch. Usually he kept to the quiet, shambly part of the city, but he'd been visiting a friend on that end of town and ran into Luigi on his way to work, mistaking him for L. They had laughed at the mix up, but Luigi was glad to meet Dimentio at last, and Dimentio was thrilled to discover L had been talking about him.
Dimentio had neglected to tease L about it later that day, but when Luigi told him that night his boyfriend was indeed very cute, the flowers and lovebites L had to come home with suddenly made sense.
Luigi and L both began to look forward to Dimentio brightening their days, either in the silly gifts he would conjure for Luigi before work, or the warm kisses he snuck around L's shop to steal. It wasn't uncommon for Dimentio to come up in conversation while Luigi and L ate dinner together.
Winter rolled around, and they began to wonder more and more where Dimentio called home. If he was safe at night, or at least warm.
L stayed up later pacing some nights, wondering where Dimentio might be and if he was okay. Some days his make out session with the preformer turned into something more, and L could give Dimentio an hour or more of warmth and comfort. But Dimentio always left into the bitter cold with L's old jacket pulled tight around his thin form, bare feet against the cold sidewalk, but no less a spring in his step or spark in his smile.
L began working late and hoarding spare change, cutting little treats for himself where he could to gather up a little bit of extra cash. When Luigi finally asked what he was up to, if he needed help with anything, L admitted he wanted to get Dimentio something warm to wear. At least some new shoes. Luigi gave him the sweetest, warmest smile, and began working overtime as well, adding extra tips to L's fund.
L was beyond tickled the day he finally could lead Dimentio into his worn shop hand in hand. After they ate and exchanged their usual quips, L reached behind the couch and handed Dimentio a very large plastic bag. They couldn't do much to wrap the gift, but Dimentio took it with a bewildered grin. "What is this, now?"
"Call it an early Christmas..." L muttered, sitting back and trying to appear as casual as possible. He was sitting on pins and needles, praying Dimentio didn't notice.
Dimentio eagerly set to digging through the bag, but his motions soon slowed. He pulled out two large, fluffy sweaters in bright colors, and a wool scarf with matching hat, holding all the items in a bundle against his chest. He turned and gave L a shaky smile, like he was waiting for the punchline. "...is this for me?"
"Yeah, it's for you," L almost laughed. "Don't want you to fuckin blow away in the wind out there."
Dimentio turned very quickly back to the gifts in his lap. He looked like he might cry. He busied himself instead pulling the box from the bottom of the bag and opening the lid with a quiet gasp.
"They're a little worn..." L apologized as Dimentio ran his fingers thoughtfully over the black boots. "We found them at a thrift store but, uh... I really didn't want you to freeze..."
Dimentio smiled, and choked a little. "I love them." he said quietly.
He tried them on, and they were a size too big, but only half a size with the colorful wool socks Luigi had tucked into the box. They were big and bulky especially since Dimentio didn't bother lacing them, but they somehow suited him when he kicked his legs back and forth on the couch, and L couldn't help smiling.
He pressed his face into L's shoulder and wrapped his arms tightly around the larger man. "I love them," he repeated.
L tried not to respond "I love you too."
Dimentio hung out around the shop the rest of the day, leaving only when L locked up for the night. L insisted he might as well come over for dinner, but Dimentio fidgeted anxiously and insisted he couldn't owe L any more favors.
L wrapped both arms around Dimentio and kissed him slow and deep. "You don't owe me. Just stay safe, okay?"
Dimentio winked, adjusting his scarf around his face to hide the bright blush coloring his cheeks. "No promises."
L bit his lip, but he steeled his nerves and tightening his grip before dimentio's fingers could slip from his. He had to know. "You got somewhere warm to sleep right?"
Dimentio gave L a peck on the cheek and squeezed his hand. "I'll find somewhere."
And then he left.
L couldn't sleep that night.
The thought of Dimentio huddled in the freezing streets was keeping him up. He had already been sick with worry, but previously he could chalk it up to paranoia. Now it had been confirmed, Dimentio was homeless. It wasn't fair. Nothing was in this awful city, but that especially tore L up.
Four times, L almost asked Luigi if he could invite Dimentio to stay. But every time he tried to come up with a reason, he felt like he was asking to keep a dog, which was both insulting to Dimentio's independence and throwing another burden on Luigi. L hated both of those things, so four times, he shut his mouth.
The fifth time had been an impromptu trip to the grocery store, stocking up on essentials. L had commented idly on people looking like they were preparing for the apocalypse.
"Its probably the storm," Luigi had carelessly reminded him.
"...what storm?" L asked, face melting to horror.
Luigi sighed a little as he compared their cart to their list. "I told you, there's supposed to be a blizzard rolling in tomorrow. They say the streets are going to freeze. Oh--remind me to leave the water running tonight, we're fucked if the pipes freeze too."
L couldn't help his knee jerk response. "Dimentio's homeless."
Luigi's eyes flew up to meet L's, wide and shocked. He knew what that meant. "What?" he asked anyway.
"Dimentio's homeless," L repeated, his voice shaking. "He's out on the streets, I don't think he has anywhere to go."
Luigi took that in for about three seconds, then took a deep, steadying breath. "Let's hurry up here and get this home, then we'll see if we can find him."
-----
Luigi almost wrecked the car when L spotted Dimentio from the passengers seat and just jumped out onto the sidewalk. L ignored the frustrated scolding behind him and bolted towards the performer.
Dimentio had taken shelter from the falling snow on a high slope beneath a bridge, but when L climbed up he discovered that Dimentio was already shivering. He was bundled in several layers, but his nose and ears were already a pale shade of blue.
"Get up, you're coming with us," L said sternly, not waiting for a reply as he grabbed Dimentio's bag and slung it over his own shoulder.
"N-no, L, it's... d-d-don't--" Dimentio tried to stutter out a protest, but he was shivering too hard in the howling wind.
His effort was interrupted by L scooping him up off the ground--all the clothes put together probably weighed more than Dimentio himself. "I don't want to hear it. We're going home."
Dimentio didn't argue with that.
Luigi had managed to stop the car nearby when L struggled back down the hill with Dimentio in his arms. L didn't think much about taking the backseat on the ride home and holding Dimentio in his lap, but the preformer didn't seem very intent on moving, so no one questioned it.
Granted the rickety apartment wasn't much, especially for three people, but anything was better in a blizzard. Luigi took Dimentio immediately into the bathroom and showed him how the shower worked, told him to get clean and more importantly, warm. He left Dimentio a soft towel and some of his own cozy pajamas, and Dimentio still seemed at a loss for words.
While he was in the shower, Luigi made a warm soup for dinner and L busied himself cleaning space in his own room for Dimentio's things and piling spare blankets onto his bed.
Dimentio arrived in Luigi's pajamas and the coat he'd been wearing, and L traded it for a softer hoodie. He was still a little uncertain, but he seemed happier and at least the color of a healthy human again.
The three piled on the couch together and ate soup out of mismatched bowls, watching TV as they chatted late into the night.
Before they headed to bed, Luigi got Dimentio to gather up what little clothes he owned so he could wash them in the morning. Luigi also produced a spare toothbrush for Dimentio they "happened" to have, and certainly hadn't bought that day hoping and praying they would find Dimentio tonight.
Dimentio was grinning ear to ear by the time everyone was getting ready to settle into bed. L insisted Dimentio keep his bed tonight, and went to the couch himself, but the preformer clung to him and bashfully asked if L would be willing to stay.
They snuggled into bed together, squished in the small space, but warm and happy to hold onto each other. They whispered in the dark for several hours before falling asleep, sneaking in soft kisses here and there.
The storm did end up snowing them in for several days, and Dimentio was happier to be in the house with each passing hour. Dimentio taught them both several card tricks, and Luigi taught Dimentio new, flashy ways to shuffle the deck. They traded stories about the ongoing struggle against the upper class, laughed over preparing meals, and snuggled together in the quiet.
On the fifth day, news reports began to state that the worst of the storm had passed, and streets should begin to get clear. The weather in the early morning channels also seemed to indicate that the danger of freezing outside would be gone.
L found Dimentio staring out of a window soon following the newscast, watching the snow fall on the empty streets outside. L sat behind him and slid his arms around Dimentio's thin waist, and the smaller man leaned back against his chest. "So I have bad news," L began with a sigh.
"Mm." was all Dimentio said.
"The truth is, we've kidnapped you," he announced grimly.
Dimentio snorted, and L could just make out his smile in the window reflection. "Is that so?"
"Unfortunately, yes, you've actually been a hostage this entire time," L went on in a deadpan, sarcastic tone. He propped his chin on Dimentio's head, and a sigh ruffled his curly hair. "I'm afraid you're going to have to stay forever."
Dimentio's grin crept a little wider. His hands wandered up and rested over L's. "Unfortunate indeed... and if I were to refuse?"
"Well, Luigi gets attached easily, so you might make him cry," L informed him.
"Hmm. Tragic." Dimentio hummed. "You're not one for tears, are you?"
L shrugged carelessly. "Nah. I'd just drag you back here. What do you weigh, like eight pounds?"
"Probably six," Dimentio agreed. He squeezed the toned muscle of L's forearms latched around his waist and teased "Hardly a struggle, even for a weak shrimp like you."
L laughed into Dimentio's hair, and squeezed the performer tighter against him. He pressed a kiss to the top of Dimentio's head and murmured "I want you to stay. We both do."
Dimentio bit his lower lip - a failed attempt to control the excited grin on his face. His hands squeezed awkwardly around L's wrists, and he sucked in a short, thrilled gasp. "I'd love to," he managed.
#dimentio#mr l#luigi#superstars#writing#drabbles#lmentio#back 👏 on 👏 my 👏 bullshit 👏#i love my shitlord L i want to write and draw him again
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she apologized for how she handled the situation and apologized for brushing off someone's honest criticisms as hate. what more is she meant to do? throw herself onto a pyre? is she not allowed to feel lousy that this whole thing blew up in her face? because she's an adult and she made a mistake, she's not allowed to be sad or stressed? she's still an imperfect human. apologizing immediately usually means people are still sensitive to their own hurt of being called out because it's fresh and on their mind so it tends to slip into their apology, but if she had waited any longer to compose herself, you guys would probably have an issue with how long she took. also, in aaaaaallll of this, I've have yet to once see what exactly about her work is so problematic? I've read her fic and I personally can't see anything wrong, although I will admit that yes, I'm a white ciswoman but I'd like to think I'm aware of negative tropes. but the only thing touted is "it made an mlm uncomfortable" but HOW??? honestly, I want to know! if anything so I can avoid doing the same thing! how is anyone meant to learn when you're not bringing up these points as often as you're explicitly laying out the problems in her apology and whatnot. I've seen 6 posts about how shit the apology was and for why and I've not once seen the original comment detailing why the fic was problematic, and I've been looking on twit, tumblr, insta, and ao3. if it's been deleted, why isn't anyone stating again and again what's wrong? also, if someone is making fic/art you don't like, don't. interact. with. it. there's tons of stuff on ao3 and twit that I don't like, some of it that I think is disgusting (do you know how many fics there are with keith/kosmos?) and I just scroll past it cause it can't hurt me if I don't read it. there's one artist that's pretty popular on Twitter and I personally really hate they way they draw klance but it's all over my tl. I respect that person's art style and creativeness and keep on moving. other people enjoy it, good for them. and if I start reading something and get surprised with something I dont like, I leave! find people who write things you like and stop engaging with creators who's things you don't like, as far as I know no one is holding a gun to your head making you read problematic fic. also for as much as you rag on her for the words she used to apologize, you don't seem to be considering your own words when offering criticism. if Taylor mistook the person's words as hate, couldn't it have been because the way he worded the complaint was done hatefully? lastly, no one, absolutely no one, is required to talk about world issues when they're running a fandom account,no matter how "big" they are. we all know what's going on in the world, we're surrounded by sad and stressful stories practically 24/7 and if someone isn't, they're probably curating their social feeds to be that way (like you should do when it come to kl content creators you don't like). people sending hate in Taylor's defense are in the wrong I agree, and this isn't hate its critism its a discussion, but Taylor isn't responsible for, how many people did you say? 16k on twit? even if she said hey guys stop, you think they would? she's can't control all those people and expecting her to is nonsense. I see so many younger fans expecting perfection in their fandoms and that just isn't going to happen. yes we should be striving to be better but no one is ever going to be perfect. not you, not me, not the mlm person, not Taylor, not anyone on any side of this argument. the only way to avoid this kind of circular dog piling and hate sending is to better curate your fandom experience by ignore those you have issues with.- 🦛
she apologized for how she handled the situation and apologized for brushing off someone's honest criticisms as hate. what more is she meant to do?
im pretty sure i said its good that she realizes she handled it poorly. but she makes the whole apology about this, doesnt directly talk about the issues and i know someone went to her to talk about it. also, it took her a day to say something about it so it wasnt exactly immediate (in the sense people had already stopped talking about it but that doesnt mean they werent still bothered). the apology was directed at mlm, and i havent seen one saying it felt genuine. of couse she can be hurt but when you apologize to a marginalized group the focus shouldnt be your feelings, but the feelings of the ones you have hurt.
I've have yet to once see what exactly about her work is so problematic?
she admits to be projecting on lance. so she makes him very femine and keith very masculine. and ok, gay couples like that do exist, but she is a woman projecting in this situation so this bothers people. putting mlm in this position is a harmful steriotype, bc it feels very heterosexual. this is a trope, it unfortunately happens a lot and its harmful. women need to be aware of what they are representing when drawing/writing mlm because well, real mlm are going to see it, and no one likes to feel like a fetish to others. and its not our place to question if the criticism is right or wrong when we are not mlm, so if you read this and think “but thats not a problem thats not a fetish etc” well, its not your place to judge that. theres more to it and you probably could get a better answer from a mlm sorry.
if someone is making fic/art you don't like, don't. interact. with. it. there's tons of stuff on ao3 and twit that I don't like, some of it that I think is disgusting (do you know how many fics there are with keith/kosmos?) and I just scroll past it cause it can't hurt me if I don't read it.
please, lets not compare a minority pointing out harmful tropes with. something fucking illegal.
as you said, you are a cis woman, of course its not going to hurt you in this case. but if people are making harmful content its not a simple matter of “dont interact with it” because they will still be promoting it, other people are going to read it, and media influences how we see minorities so of course people will not like when they see bad portrayal of them. also, tumblr sucks so even if you want to just “dont interact with it” its hard because even after blocking you can still cross the content of someone. not sure how it works on twitter but anyway this discussion started on tumblr and tumblr doesnt stop people who were bothered by her to avoid her by blocking.
if Taylor mistook the person's words as hate, couldn't it have been because the way he worded the complaint was done hatefully?
i think she deleted the ask by now, but i dont remember the ask being hateful. i remember someone asking if she was a fujoshi, and another person mentioned that mlm didnt like the way she portrayals klance. i dont remember it being hateful. but again, she apologized for handling it badly. its just that she stops there.
no one, absolutely no one, is required to talk about world issues when they're running a fandom account,no matter how "big" they are. we all know what's going on in the world, we're surrounded by sad and stressful stories practically 24/7 and if someone isn't, they're probably curating their social feeds to be that way
ignoring world issues is a privilege. if someone is able to turn off from all the problems in the world, its a privilige. yes no one should talk aobut it all the time thats not even healthy, but to never talk about it is a privilege. thats what black people are saying, they cant just turn off from racism, so yes they are going to expect white people to do something. online honestly i cant do shit, i dont think anything i reblog here does a difference and i do what i can in my own country, but she has a plataform that could help bring awareness. again, its a privilege to be able to curate your social media to be a perfect happy place.
even if she said hey guys stop, you think they would? she's can't control all those people and expecting her to is nonsense.
maybe they wouldnt, but if people were doing this type of thing in my name, in my defense, i would at least say something about it idk. she cant control them but she makes nothing to show that she disagrees or look for the people being harassed to say something about it.
the only way to avoid this kind of circular dog piling and hate sending is to better curate your fandom experience by ignore those you have issues with.
when it comes to simple things like “i prefer taller lance and i dont like taller keith” yeah, its fine to ignore people who draw taller keith and move on with your life or something like that. but we are talking about mlm, a real group of people, being upset for being portrayed in a harmful and steriotype way. its everywhere in fandom, and in real life. they cant escape from real life, and then they come to fandom where everyone wants some escapism and have to deal with more issues. its tiring
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a comparison of both my setups, one at the university studio, and the one i have at home. evidently, my setup at home is quite limited, and mostly makeshift. both setups had the same issue where the glass would reflect whatever was above it, like the checkered ceiling at the studio.
to solve this, a black blanket was laid across the camera stand and the unused lights, and black tape was used to cover the logo of the camera as well. at home, i stuck another blackboard to the bottom of my shelf, and bought a black phone case. even with these solutions, however, i still had to zoom in with the camera lens in both cases because the glass still reflected the edges, leaving me very little space to work with.
to further enhance the appearance of the paint, lighting had to come from either side of the glass so that it was even, and you could see the path of the rubbed-out marks left behind and the textures of the paint. with my home setup however, i had to make do with the only “lamp” i had which is a ring light i use for video calls. i positioned this to one side and hoped that the mirror on the other side of the glass reflected at least a tiny amount of light to illuminate the other side of the glass (it probably didnt work but i did it anyway). i think next time i might have to borrow someone elses lamp or a torch.
as for my research on method, i did some digging and found an interview of miyo sato, a paint-on-glass animator who inspires me through her work on the anime mob psycho 100. here, she talks about her experience animating with the medium, and reveals the setup she has in her studio. i watched a tutorial/demonstration by patrick jenkins on his method, and found that he uses gouache mixed with vegetable glycerine and water. i was also warned that using too much colour would brown my work, so that was another thing i needed to watch out for. class discussion and consultation from fellow students helped to confirm my findings, and i was finally able to animate using this medium.
i found that: 1) watercolour and oil paints are far too liquid and easily dull in colour with the application of water 2) i would rather avoid the smell of oil and spirits in my room 3) acrylic would dry too fast, so would be harder to move around and 4) gouache was a good midpoint between these paints as it can maintain both its viscosity and colour when wet.
with this in mind, i also drew inspiration from incredible paint-on-glass films like black soul by martine chartrand and the music video monotonous purgatory by saori shiroki for matryoshka.
here, i drew a rough storyboard that i wouldnt necessarily follow to the letter, but would serve as concepts for the progression of the paint as it morphs and moves from one image to another. i also noted down materials i would need for the days that followed.
as the theme of the project is about identity, i decided to focus on what part of my own identity i felt strongest about at the moment. at the same time, i had been listening to a lot of mitski, a japanese-american singer songwriter whose music frequently discusses themes of isolation, having to live up to white western cultural standards of beauty, and issues of self acceptance. as i find myself actively relating to all of those themes, i found that it was appropriate to use a section of her music as a first reference of expression, to express the turmoil i have every so often with being gay. in the studio, i would play the song “geyser” on repeat for hours while i painted, checking the strength of every frame against the strength of the emotions building up in the music.
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you know what i could go for?? [late night ramble journey ahead // i did not re-read this so who knows!!]
an in-depth fic about klaus’s ten months in vietnam.. but with ben there. klaus getting pants and a gun shoved at him and ben is just as confused and freaked out. klaus finding out where they are, or ben finding out and telling him. klaus meeting dave and ben is sitting next to him, side eyeing dave because who is this soldier and why did he come all the way from the back of the bus to introduce himself. ben sees it / can tell when klaus shoves the briefcase under their seat right after and ben’s just like ‘are you fucking kidding me??’ and of course klaus would make stupid decisions because of an attractive man with a sweet smile. so he’s exasperated but also concerned because it’s 1968 and people like klaus are treated even worse now than they are in 2019, way worse, and all of these men are probably straight - dave included. and if any of them are gay they’re not gonna say anything let alone act on it. it wouldn’t be worth it. klaus could get himself hurt or killed just for being himself, if he acts too.. well.. himself after that he stays by klaus’s side more than he did in their own time, which is really saying something. offers advice and wisdom like he always has. he warns him about snipers and mines and bullets and in turn klaus warns his squad. ben can’t lie - it feels pretty fucking good to be responsible for saving lives without having to take any. he still wishes klaus would just try the briefcase, he has it, but at some point he stops pushing. because he does think klaus needs to go back and soon but everytime he brings it up klaus gets defensive and angry - he can do what he wants. he has friends here now. he has a family that actually likes him. that actually cares. he’s considered useful and important and he’s on drugs!! he can get high and none of them think any less of him for it. why can’t ben see that maybe this is where he belongs?? maybe the middle of the fucking vietnam war is where he fits?? and it’s not like he has anyone or anything back home. the only thing he could have missed is ben and ben’s with him in 1968 so there’s literally nothing. and ben wants to yell back, he wants to argue that there’s plenty for klaus to go back to, but he’s realizing that klaus.. might be right. and that hurts. and of course pisses ben off but it hurts because nobody should have to travel back in time and fight in a pointless war to find basic respect, especially not klaus. klaus who has been through enough - who deserves good things more than anyone ben knows. so after that conversation he doesn’t bring it up anymore. he looks at it sometimes, and thinks about their siblings, how they just gained their missing brother only to lose another, how are they doing? have they noticed klaus is missing yet? did they see the motel room?? did they know that all of that blood was klaus’s?? (shh patch didn’t die, hazel and cha cha escaped by knocking her out but she lives because i said so. diego shows up and finds her, freaks out at first but is relieved that she’s fine. he manages to get her to wake up and she tells him that klaus was there. he was hurt, very very hurt, but he got away. she doesn’t know where he went, he crawled through the vent, and he’s gone, diego. you need to find him - he needs a hospital. ahem anyway) ben thinks on these things and it never takes him long to get disgusted looking at it because it contains, in a way, their family. and he thinks he knows the answers. he gets to a point where he decides he wouldn’t be upset if they never had to see those jackasses again. his loyalties lie with klaus, after 13 years together there’s no way they wouldnt be. and if doing what’s best for klaus, doing what makes klaus happy, is staying right where they’ve found themselves than he can deal with it. that’s where he ends up anyway but its definitely not a quick or easy point to reach. he’s there for every battle, all the days of marching, watching klaus kill people and knowing how badly it’s affecting his brother and yet he doesn’t stop. he doesn’t pull back without orders, doesn’t put his gun down until he knows his squad is safe. and that fierceness grows as he gets closer to dave. ben doesn’t know what to think of dave at first, probably doesn’t trust him - knowing every man klaus has ever found attractive or had a “relationship” with before - but ben literally watches this - admittedly handsome - soldier boy fall in love with klaus, and klaus with him. ben witnesses the disco. the private conversation - from a distance, he’s doesn’t feel quite right listening in and he can still see them. the way they look at each other. how gently dave approaches every moment with klaus - the hand on his cheek, their first kiss (which he WILL tease klaus about later) when they head back to the hotel that was booked for all the guys for r&r, ben decides to wander saigon instead because he’s pretty sure he knows where things are going to go considering klaus and dave are roommates (oh my god they were roommates) by the time he gets back they’re both passed out (in the same bed. as he expected) from that day forward klaus is happy, genuinely happy in a way ben can’t remember him ever being, and dave has of course gained ben’s full approval (especially when klaus tells dave about the ghosts and dave believes him. even turns to where klaus is pointing at ben and tells ben that he’s happy that klaus has at least one good sibling, that he’s happy to know ben is there. when dave knows ben is there he always greets him. it’s not anything that grand really but it means a lot to ben. and when klaus finally tells him about the time travel, a little later on, dave believes him then too. said it made sense because he always thought there was no way someone as incredible as klaus could’ve come from the same place as he himself - let alone the same time. it never seemed to.. fit) SO ben is a fan. and he stays by both their sides - keeping them alive as best he can - along with a few other ghosts who are coherent, previous members of the 173rd, who pass things on to ben when klaus is too high. they talk, as long as no one but dave is around - dave who adapts pretty easily to klaus holding a whole conversation with someone he can’t see or hear. and ben.. stays ben. the only thing being in the war really changes is the way he views their siblings and he now has one other live person that he can “talk” to. eventually, almost 11 months in, they find out they’re getting sent to the frontlines. even closer to the danger. and klaus has a bad feeling. this is when ben brings up the briefcase again, hesitantly, and before klaus goes off reminds him that they could take dave with them. if he wanted to go. klaus can return to their time, to relative safety, and still have dave. it’s no longer a ‘one or the other’ situation. all they have to do is get dave to say ‘yes’. he says it very quickly of course (if you think i’d let dave die you’re out of your goddamn mind) he can be tough and feral when he needs to be, when pushed if klaus is in danger but he isn’t a killer, he doesn’t want to be a killer, he wants out. but he also wants a life with klaus and while they talked about going back to the states in.. well.. dave’s time and getting a little house and all that - doing that in 2019 sounds much better. especially after the night klaus told him softly about how things were different for lgbtq+ people, how they could hold hands and be as out as they wanted. get married. adopt. all things dave spent his whole life believing he’d never be allowed to have. so they do it - right then. klaus pulls out the briefcase and they gather the few things they wanted to keep and in a bright light they’re gone. (maybe they said something, or goodbye, to each squadmate before leaving. maybe they didnt and it hurt but if they waited around to get through everyone it would be too late to run) AND OH!! they take the ghost soldiers with them / the ghost soldiers find them in 2019, because i’m a slut for klaus having good ghosts, friend ghosts, who - even if they died horribly, are still the same person they were alive. and maybe sometimes they look like their deaths and sometimes they can look normal - ben teaching the soldiers how to be ghosts?? including how to appear as you were; whole, no holes or blood or missing limbs or chunks of head blown off. they’re all grateful and so is klaus. tho listen: he still gets high because i fucking said so - however, at least until the world is saved, he sticks to cigarettes and - for sleeping purposes - pot, dave does as well. because dave isnt a square. maybe he sticks to that path afterwards. maybe not. i for one support everything except 100% sobriety 100% of the time in this instance anyway: later on when klaus can make ben corporeal for any amount of time he wants ben tells their siblings about the real life romantic drama he got to watch close up, from their first meeting all the way to the return to 2019. he also mentions a lot of things about the war, the sights and sounds of senseless murder - something their brother and his boyfriend were forced to take part in - the wounds they had to deal with, heal through. klaus and dave definitely have some scars. the fear. and that’s after telling them about hazel and cha cha and the almost two days they had klaus and nobody noticed. (maybe klaus lets his siblings meet the other soldiers, maybe not. maybe he lets them wander the mansion corporeal to scare the shit out of people. who knows) ben wants to make their siblings feel bad. he wants them to hurt and feel guilty. it’s the very least they deserve he thinks, when it’s all said and done. he hasn’t been able to say anything to them for 13 years and he’s got a lot of things built up - but gotta say, the last year (five-ish days?? starting at ep.1) have really taken the whole goddamn cake. klaus is embarrassed and shocked and actually quite touched that little benny is really going feral for the first time - though he keeps trying to tell him none of it is a big deal. he doesnt like confrontation. dave however is extremely pleased by the whole thing. klaus kept saying he and ben would get along if they ever got to meet and he was right. ben had, with a serious face, dubbed them the klaus hargreeves love & protection squad (bc dave doesnt know what the fuck even a ‘meem’ is yet) and that’s that. they make up a handshake and everything. klaus has never felt so loved.
aaand eventually klaus and dave and ben (because of course he’s invited) do get that little house away from the city - someplace with few to no ghosts. someplace they can make their home. they make sure it has a room they can make up for ben even though he doesnt sleep (he still deserves his own space. a place to get away from them if he wants. somewhere to put his books and such. ben doesnt get emotional about that at all. absolutely not.) and they get pets and klaus gardens and ben reads books about gardening so he can help and dave works (mechanic is always a good time. or bookstore owner!! coffee shop?? listen. those may or may not be my favorite aus) and maybe the siblings get to visit and maybe they mend things and bond or whatever idk THE POINT IS:: Ben is a good brother and i think the idea of him going through vietnam with klaus is interesting and if someone with more ideas/thoughts ever wrote this i would be on that like cheese on broccoli honestly. THE SECOND POINT IS:: Klaus and Dave deserve to be happy and have the life they dreamed about together and if they shared their home with anyone it would be the Bentacles SO… OKAY… that definitely did it’s own thing but i really really genuinely love thinking about what those months would have been like with ben there - what he would have thought or said or done about things yknow?? and how that would have affected klaus/changed things. i didnt give a lot of examples in this because my brain didn’t want to stay on track (as if it ever does) but it’s 1:30 in the morning and im so fucking tired lsdfd;lk if you actually read this.. first of all: im sorry. second of all: thank you. and literally if anyone ever wrote something about this topic (not like.. this post specifically, just the ben in vietnam plot) and nobody important dies i’ll love you and give you a lil smooch on the noggin s m ooch. smooches. you know who likes smooches?? klaus. you know who deserves smooches?? klaus. you know who’s getting smooches?? THAT’S RIGHT. KLAUS. because dave has a degree in giving them and he can’t let that education go to waste amiright??
this post.. may or may not have been brought to you by wine as well..
ope
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sorry in advance for how long this post is but i am going to talk about animal crossing villagers for an hour because i am bored
fuchsia was one of my bffs in acnl and i still love her. i do not like hair on furries usually but fuchsia is GAY and has GARISHLY BRIGHT COLORS so i am in love with her. she has... blue tummy also which is extremely cute. she was one of my first 2 villagers on my island and she is Still There
i REALLY like this personality type but im not a fan of most of the designs that come with it... cherry, agnes, and reneigh are the exceptions IMO. katt i like less because i think she’s cute and more because of the gay vibes.
i dont like.. most of the smug villagers, or really the dialogue options that come with them in this game. marshall lives in my acnl town (this is a pattern that will pop up with my preferences across this whole list lmfao) and i think he’s cute. i was caught off guard by how popular a villager he is though lmfao
raymond is cute and i like “office worker cat” because it is silly
everyone else is mediocre IMO
hrhrhghhgh i LOVE the lazy villagers. mostly, honestly, because of how they acted in acnl. stitches and pudge both live in my acnl town and they are EXTREMELY cute and talk about food and napping all the time and are Very friendly. i could give or take all the talk about bugs in the new one, BUT i think their dialogue options generally give off the vibe of “silly little animal that is being translated into humanspeak” and i really like that
i love the absurd memes that Bob is in and i want him on my island. i currently have stitches (acnl nostalgia and cute design, bones (looks good in every outfit and is Just Baby), papi (same as bones), hornsby (one of my early villagers that i will probs Eventually get rid of but im attached to him so maybe not, he’s also Baby), and Moe (originally had him in the F tier but then he showed up at my campsite and now i love him and his little buck teeth). i used to have zucker but he made me hungry every time i interacted with him so i booted him.
yes half of my villagers are lazy. yes i love living like this. i am constantly bombarded by dumb little animals who want to tell me their houses are full of bugs and then sprint off in a different direction to smell a flower
i do not like the jocks, which perhaps makes sense considering how much i stan the lazies. kid cat is cute and i have his amibo card by chance, so i am not prioritizing finding these guys. i think antonio is also cute and has good colors and patterns, but is kind of boring looking. everyone else i could NOT care less about. i got the emoji sheep in my campsite once and didnt even bother talking to him.
flora is my BEST friend in acnl and YES im saying that without a shred of irony. her house is right next to mine and she constantly jokes about moving in with me. one of my rooms is decorated for her. she’s! my! friend!!!!!!!!! she’s nice to me and i love her.
i have not yet gotten my grubby little paws on her in this game but i will not rest until she is on my island. i love her little house interior that is modeled after wild flamingos vs the pink explosion that was her house in acnh. I Want Her. Give Her To Me.
ruby and rosie are also good but they are leagues below flora. ruby i like because of that one edgy comic that starred her back in the day (u know, the one with like, Experiments Gone Wrong that was all animal crossing characters). rosie i like cuz she was my favorite in my gamecube world.
i just kicked out twiggy, whom i will MISS because she made an adorable stupid face with her beak when she was crafting. she was really cute but i wanted to get stitches. sorry twiggy u were nice to me u_u
i currently have ketchup who is also cute but i would boot her in an instant for basically anyone else on her row and above. i just saw piper on an island when i was finding stitches and she was really cute so she got bumped up from the meh tier even though i passed her up. everyone else is fine
normal personality is Also rife with good designs.... i want kitties on my island.
i have gladys and coco right now, both of whom arrived pretty early on. unfortunately the dialogue for normals in this game is so unbelievably bland that i do not feel any sort of connection with either of them, despite liking their designs a lot. gladys is in my acnl town and shares the “top fav” spot with flora in that game, but here she is Just Boring. so i would probably let her leave if i could find.. a kitty cat. and then coco i just like cuz i want to be edgy. look at her spooky little O_O face next to all the cutesy villagers lmfao. she’s good
snooty personality is not one of my faves, but the designs here ARE pretty good. i like pink wolf. i currently have 0 of these guys on my island just by happenstance. had portia at one point but i dont think she’s that great so she left.
mathilda DID show up in my campsite recently, but i decided against including her bcuz my memories of how she acted in the gamecube version were SO disjointed with her current personality. she was so mean in gamecube and i wanted even a shadow of that -- but instead she was..... polite. it was weird. maybe if she shows up again i’d change my mind, but the character design not matching up with the personality bothers me enough that i probs wouldnt
i like the cranky dialogue in this game. i had lobo on the gamecube and i was obsessed with him because i was a wolf girl at that age, so i would be delighted to slap him onto my island, BUT.. i have fang currently and he’s a good boy. very distinguished, has a lovely classy house, and i like his design. butch is also cute.
now here is this monstrosity. the past games are just gamecube and new leaf. each row (aside from the last 2) are arranged in most to least liked also. the “passed up on” and “let move out” lists are incomplete cuz i forget things immediately in this game
and now. to summarize:
thanks for coming with me on this journey
#text#ramblings#long post#acnh#doing this got me out of a depressive spiral so actually? time well spent#im like very carefully arranging it to get the max amt of personalities but i REALLY dont care about snooty or jock so i might. MIGHT#axe kid cat and pink wolf in order to keep 2 more lazies lmfao#WE SHALL SEE.... this is assuming i have the patience to to villager hunting for more than 1 hr#also can you guys tell i like cats and wolves. can u.#i really REALLY want to play my DS animal crossing game but i packed it up for my move to colorado which is taking 10000 years unfortch#can i get an f in the chat :/#im sposed to be sleeping rn but i had caffeine at 5 pm because someone brought me a soda as a gift to show she was listening to me earlier#it was very sweet and then i drank it and NOW! i will be awake until 2#i have no regrets tho it was important to show my appreciation for the gift#do you guys like how i put bob above stitches in the lazies box and then put him below stitches in the final 2 rounds#insert that walt whitman quote about contradicting myself here#coco is so fucking funny to me because it's a bunch of sweet-faced cute villagers and then just O_O#hey if you read through this entire post AND the full paragraph of tags: i am impressed with u
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I've come to the conclusion that I am gay for Nejire so..! Can I have possibly a scenario of a shy fem reader secretly crushing on Nejire, but is too nervous to tell her? Until she gets the courage she leaves Nejire a lily with a note saying that by the time Nejire receives (however many flowers you want) her secret admire will reveal themselves, but the last flower is fake and when the reader comes clean she says it's because she will love Nejire until the last flower dies which won't happen.
"Come on y/n, you gotta tell her some day!"
Violently shaking your head as you talked to Tamaki, you stared at Nejire - the beautiful periwinkle haired girl who you deemed your crush. Even though you were friends with Tamaki, you rarely spoke to Nejire, becoming too nervous after your initial introduction.
"I doubt shed like me... shes so popular, she probably has dozens of people asking her out every day."
Tamaki sighed, shaking his head. "No she doesnt. And besides, you know Nejire, even if she doesn't like you - it's not like shes going to be rude. Worst case scenario you two end up best friends."
Tamaki was close to the girl- so you felt he was telling the truth. But still, how could you ask out someone as amazing as her? Then again... youd probably just end up suffering more if you never did, at least this way theres still a slim chance of her accepting.
"Tamaki, what's her favorite flower?"
Lillies. You ran back to the dorms - a dozen lillies in your hand, this was how you'd ask her. A girl like Nejire deserves something grand, and romantic. And you bet your butt that you're going to give it to her.
Barging into your dorm room, you carefully put the flowers into a vase you had readied earlier, and sat down at your desk, writing a note to go along with the flower.
"Nejire, I've liked you for a while now - and I've finally gotten the courage to tell you. But, you'll have to wait. This is the first of a dozen lillies, and with the last one, I will show myself."
You drew a little heart next to it for good measure, but your hands were shaking at this point. Gah, you were so nervous! Now all you had to do was drop it in front of her dorm room and knock, then hide of course. Could you do it though?
You had to do it. You've come so far, you have to finish now. So you shakily stood up, grabbing the first of many lillies and drying it off before placing it in between the note you folded in half, and quickly walked to her dorm.
Before you could even think you were there, and you stared at the door, nervous about what you were doing. But you looked around and no one would see you, so you carefully placed the note and lily on the floor before knocking- and then booking it away so she wouldnt have the chance to see you.
Once you got back to your dorm, you pulled out your phone to text Tamaki.
"I did it."
"I know, shes telling me and Mirio about her new 'secret admirer.' Good job!"
You blushed and smiled as butterflies filled your stomach- she seems happy at least. You can only hope shell still be happy when she finds out its you.
Every day, you continued your routine. Write a note, take a flower, drop it at her dorm, and run, except you did it at a different time every day so that she couldn't catch you. In each note you took the time to compliment her, telling her the things you liked about her.
"You're beautiful."
"You're the kindest person I've ever met."
"You're so strong and caring."
The 11th note, you wrote "Are you ready to see who I am? I hope you're happy with me."
Finally, it came. The 12th day. You nervously walked towards Nejire's dorm, only holding the final lily in your hand. Arriving at her door, you hesitated. Maybe you could leave right now - shed probably be disappointed, but shed never know it was you.
No, you're literally at the end point. You cant quit when you're so close to being done.
So, you slowly raised your hand - and you knocked.
You heard rustling from inside the room accompanied by an excited squeal, and you smiled at her cute antics. At least she was excited - hopefully you're good enough to meet her expectations.
She swings the door open, and her eyes widen as she sees you standing there. At first she thinks you're there for some other reason, but then she notices the flower in your hand. Except - its fake.
"Y/n? You're my secret admirer?"
You nodded, trying to be confident even though you were shaking with anxiety and your face was burning. "Mhmm... Nejire, I really like you. I think I love you. I was too scared to just tell you so I did all this to help me prepare for this."
You held out the plastic lily to her, and she took it with a soft smile on her face. "Y/n.. thank you, this is the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me! If you dont mind me asking, why is this one fake?"
You shifted back and forth on your heels, embarrassed to say it. But - "its... well, it symbolizes my love for you, because I wont stop until every last flower has died - including this one."
Nejire was quiet for a minute, and you were so nervous that you stared at the ground. Why wasn't she saying anything? Shes probably just thinking of the nicest way to tell you she just wants to be friends.
"Y/n, I love you too."
Shocked, you finally looked up, and you were met with the happiest smile you had ever seen. You felt tears well up in your eyes at her confession, and you couldnt help yourself as you hugged her.
"I've been wanting to ask you for a while, but it seems you beat me to it. So let me ask you this, will you be my girlfriend?"
Tamaki smiled as you and Nejire walked into the cafeteria hand in hand the next day - maybe next time youd listen to his advice sooner.
#m e t o o fam#nejire headcanons#nejire imagine#nejire hadou#nejire x reader#nejire#bnha#mha#boku no hero academia#my hero academia
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ive bought harrow the ninth and am now attempting to reread act 1 so that i may understand it better
ianthe clearly proposes that Harrow not get herself killed trying to bring Gideon back - reading it over again. instead to take the future and somehow?? be really powerful together and forget about their cavaliers. but harrow says no
im once again struck with how offhand this book introduces the concept that the empire goes out to deliberately kill planets over a couple of generations
now im not sure....there also seems to be an implication that there’s no aliens - because they say only humanity has a soul - but client planets were said to rebel - i guess the human colonisers rebel against central solar system command sometimes? but then what enemy does the Cohort fight? possibly it’s just bigotry that they think aliens dont have a soul
but like - they find LIVING PLANETS and then - kill them slowly. to the extent that they need to move the entire population. WHAT? why do they do that??? just so they can do some bone tricks???!
what the fuk
so how did the planets get murdered again? and which solar system planets could really have been said to have had enough life to have a soul?? cos like, only one of them is really known for that
why did God give Harrow the choice to go back home TWICE if he was never going to let her?
once again, why mess with the Hand candidates if God was always gonna come for Cytherea? just to mess with him more?
yeah - harrow keeps hearing and saying ortus ninegad but the rest of the world remembers gideon.
Harrow truly is totally mentally shattered AND time is totally fucked up
but sometimes in the fake-ish timeline Harrow remembers but doesn’t remember Gideon - like how she notes that there were two womb-bearing members of the Ninth who were the right age...but only elaborates on herself
for some reason - Harrowhark remembers Ianthe’s arm ripped from her by Cytherea - but now it’s whole. for some reason
that letter is still so what the fuck
‘like you did the last time’ - hm harrowhark sewed Ianthe’s lips shut? how did she come by the power?
is ianthe - calling Harrowhark God?
throughout the first act, they keep referring to time, having too much time, or not mastering time, or not having enough time, ‘this time’ etc.
the eggs you gave me all died - that’s DIRECTED at Harrow, is my theory
ok but the planet revenants come after Lyctors and also God (- God became God when? at the Resurrection) before the Lyctors happened - God was still at Canaan House - despite the Revenants already coming right...
is Teacher criticising god and lyctors for leaving Canaan House lol?
ok so yeah Canaan House WAS part of a ‘last sacrifice’
ok so - Harrowhark is a little resurrection miracle. This implies that God killed a lot to resurrect the Houses.
wow God is being a very dad to Harrow
Blood of Eden - BOE - they turned their back on the solar system. now they hate necromancy. in other words - when the solar system died, God resurrected it - but before that point some humans had fled - lived. and they can see what absolute fuckin horror necromancy is ACTUALLY
so what im getting is...maybe...god resurrected humanity by killing the planets...?
i just realised that Ianthe has taken Gideon’s place as the smartass in the room - the counterweight to Harrow’s portentousness
what the fuck do augustine’s comments to Mercy mean???? why is she unloveable? why would he say that God doesn’t need her? and why is it obscene that Augstine calls God John? What is the dangerous game she’s playing? What was the foul implication??
‘Then that is your downfall’ OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Harrow BURN!!!
what i don’t get is - the Cohort is an army - when they land they die because they’re being killed by an enemy at the front - NOT in pure sacrifice for thanergy. so why does only the death of humans and planets produce thanergy. why is the death of the enemy not good enough? they don’t have fuckin souls?? they MUST be complex life. and doesn’t a planet produce a constant stream of thanergy? but i guess it’s not dying enough - generally its life maintains itself in ecosystems.....unless a fuckin lyctor ‘makes the juice flow’ i guess!
sometime in the next book there IS gonna be a ‘are we the baddies’ meme. muir loves memes and she stuck skulls on absolutely EVERYTHIGN. Like WHY THE FUCK would you colonise planets if you gotta kill them for it? LOL????
huh? augustine just said that they can’t use necromancy when in the river - but mercy mocked harrow for having hypothermia ? implying her fundamental failure was not being able to necro while in the river? Harrow’s inability was what was wrong partly right?? oh no ok it’s how Harrow tried to compensate for her body going lights out while in the river. alright. that was written confusingly
how and why is this a completely different story???
The Sleeper.......is Harrowhark? the suit is too close to what she was wearing killing the asteroid. and the sleeper is lying on ‘something’. oh they just straight up say it lololol
ortus got into trouble 19 years ago...hhmmmmm wasn’t Gideon 19??? huh? which is why Mercy started at Harrow’s peculiar YELLOW eyes that Harrow can’t see herself i think
‘i do things face to face’ ortus says after stabbing harrow. HUH? why go for a stab if decapitating would have done the job? just to give her a small chance to fight back? (face to face?)
why not tell God that ‘his’ attack dog is trying to kill you?
why does Ortus the First want me dead? ‘who?’ ---uh. has she forgotten him completely (time shit) or is she saying the wrong name? mercy wouldnt reply like that then right?
she told him and he’s like - oh well guess you gotta just get through repeated almost-successful attacks on your life. ???? THANKS GOD!!!
‘you, with your unfortunate memory for poetry’ HA! i love how we are reminded that she knew all the fuckin damn books nearly by heart which is insane!
Teacher suggests his dying at least three times a day?? hahaha what?.........................is this purely a meme reference. is that meme the mental image im supposed to have of Teacher??????????? is this trying to say that this meme was preserved in the amalgamation of human life that is Teacher?? oh my god....
no.....palamedus and camilla....did old Harrow really kill them.....
seems like all the murders were consensual maybe?
it’s probably too straightforward that Harrow created and alternate timeline and made for a Harrow Lyctor without Gideon dying and kicked her to the original? maybe she took Ianthe and Coronabeth with her bc she needed Ianthe’s help
is this Cytherea or Dulcinea? Pro seems real this time. why does Dulcie call Pal and Cam strands and cords?
did muir put in a fuckin secondary school S - muir’s just like - im gonna put in all the memes as a nod to ancient human culture
still no idea what the messages are that Harrow is getting
This Harrow is so goddamn sick. I mean she was sick before, but at least she had Gideon. Really do feel that that helped her. now she didn’t have that -- AND she’s getting slapped with trauma another five times
if ortus can undo the thanergy of her own bone then why not simply crumble HARROW into dust? cos there’s a core of thanergy fusion in her that he can’t undo?
FLKJDFKLJSDLFSD fucking IANTHE ‘Wow! Not how I imagined this happening, at all.’ FUCKIN HELL
Harrow with her fucking fucked up dramatic inner monologues about weakness and Ianthe comes in with this shit. she really is doing Gideon proud here.
Did love Harrow’s musings about how only a truly idiotically obedient Cavalier would be the only one to keep to a vow of silence. HAH! nice one muir
‘have you taken the time to rest lately?’ asks God, YOUR FUCKING SAINT IS TRYING TO KILL HER IN THE FUCKING BATH YOU IDIOT AHAHAHAHA
JEZUS FUCKING CHRIST - try and be normal Harrow! try and make some soup and read a book! Harrow: *does and then hyperventilates hidden under her bed after 86 hours of zero sleep*
she was trying to remember what cutlery did. why is this so goddamn funny hahahaa. this book has ONLY been Harrow being in extreme states of misery ALL THE TIME both mentally and physically to the point of death
GOD IS HAPPY THAT SHE MADE SOUP AND DOESNT EVEN FUCKIN NOTICE SHE’S NOT SLEPT FOR A WEEK SOMEHOW THIS IS THE MOST HILARIOUS SHIT
thats what you fucking GET you piece of shit god! you push a prodigy teen to the brink and she fuckin explodes your lyctor and feeds you her fuckin marrow. maybe you shouldn’t have ignored her goddamn fucking understandable distress
SHE FUCKIN HITS HIM WITH THE FUCKIN TRUTH what an IDIOT of a God. he truly doesn’t understand mortality anymore huh
I LOVE HOW MERCYMORN CONTINUES TO MAKE HARROW YOUNGER IN HER HEAD AHAHAHAHAHAHA she’s only nine years old!!!hahahaha
naturally God focuses on how - wait- actually harrow is truly an INSANE necromancer - INSANE
still no idea what the fuck is going on in the not-past
aww. ianthe’s scent soothes harrow now. begrudgingly of course.
i thought this was gonna be lovely angsty harrow/gideon but naturally that did not happen
harrow is comfortable! first time in the whole book! one moment of comfort!!!
‘love my twin, also murder’ tridentarius pffjlfjdljf
‘how i crave your honeyed words’ hah
wow this scene sure is weirdly sexual with these similes lol ‘as though she had shyly undressed for you’ ok there Harrow you about to chop her arm off calm it probably sex repulsed thirsty teen
i do love how....there is this theme again that’s everybody underestimating the main character - who is actually a prodigy. Gideon had that with the sword and Harrow also has it with being a Lyctor now
it’s so telling that these Saints would rather be shits to these babies than help Ianthe grow a new fuckin arm
i dont see why Ianthe can’t work off this bone construct which is her own stuff and put some flesh on it since SHES A FLESH NECRO?
Ianthe that’s super gay
wow muir really never delivers on full gay does she??? i dont mind but i think it’s so striking hahaa
how are Harrow and Ianthe still hung up on the Saint of Duty? i mean, if they dont have him against the RB they’re dead anyway
why is the First going through rain and ice?
Harrow haunted? naawwww
i cant help but like mercymorn though - she cares. it’s soured ages ago but she cares.
awww Harrow needs Ianthe to sleep
Ianthe constantly poking Harrow for her prudishness is so goddamn funny.
‘It’s the type of energy i wish to take into my future’ AHAHAHAHAHAAH IANTHE MY GOD
‘i always forget you were an honest to go nun ... and six years old to boot if you listen to mercymorn’ HAHAHAHAHAHA
‘you look good enough that im proud of my handiwork but not so good that i’ll be consumed with lust and ravish you over the nut bowl’ fpdfjsdfkjsd this is what harrow means with crude japery and yet....
mercymorn has started to call harrow three years old. i will NEVER tire of this gag
all of the blood of eden stuff happened in the past 25 years??? god was on the erebos, but he also remembers ortus kicking the commander out of an airlock? that was in the last 25 years??
Ianthe‘s carressing the nape of Harrow’s neck. hmmhm
its honestly super weird if you think about it for more than 10 seconds that theyre talking about their cavaliers whom they murdered (im still not sure if all consensually) ten thousand years ago (!) and how hot they were that just seems.....fucked up
Harrow is like WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! basically all the time but especially now. yep well that was to be expected i guess lololol
Harrow being painfully frozenly fascinated by (god having) sex and deeply repulsed is very Harrow
oh nooooo well that was a perfect kiss between them really
the funny thing about Harrow is that though she is so completely fucked up - just like Gideon - she is fundamentally a helper.
why wouldn’t Harrow have thought of blood wards! she knew he could only bleed thanergy! it;s the first thing i thought - just use not bone wards then!
ortus thinks anastasia is in Harrow - which makes me think - why does he think that’s possible?
mercymorn now calls Harrow a two-year-old. i am waiting for embryonic genius
so did they use the river to get to the planets theyre killing?
Harrow feels the peace and pleasure of a stroll through nature that she has come to kill
oh my god - Harrow somehow saved Cam and Pal is still attached to the mortal plane!!
Harrow helps Cam risking herself entirely just like that. yknow as she does
i wonder if Pal has realised that Harrow is not who he remembers
i think he realised once he realised haz mat suit was Harrow also...
ianthe xo’d harrow.....lol
im sad that original harrow is definitely dead.... :( loved her. guess gideon’s not coming back either. not sure how the second adept survived. she didn’t survive in the original timeline either. but she was ‘killed’ in the other - just like coronabeth..so that means soemthing
this whole ‘flashback’ stuff to Canaan House is Harrow being in the River the whole time. the cold temperatures, the blood, the creatures theyre fishing from the sea that apparently abominations
after all, we’ve just learned about river bubbles and a haz!harrow that can change their parameters.
all the people ‘dead’ she’d not spoken to much or at all beforehand. like they’re NOT real, in the River. the only one not like that is Dyas...
the fact that the narrative keeps calling Dulcie, Dulcie means she’s really Dulcie.
there’s giant organs falling from the ceiling. this is definitely the river
they talk about time AGAIN
the Body is the devil who let herself be used to complete the work of Teacher and the Lyctors in his mythology....hmm. and when they realised the price (AFTER? the work was done?) they wanted her dead but he buried her....SHE allowed them to become Lyctors?? I still don’t understand why the heck that was necessary
the king is dead, long live the king. hmmmm
Harrow comes onto a hallucination of the devil who was her first crush with the voice of her parental figures and the eyes of a love interest she can no longer remember - which is actually not precisely a hallucination probably - and gets summarily rejected lol OUCH (the Body didn’t mean it that way ofc)
Harrow is so repressed on every single front but definitely sexually
I love Mercy
so there is death beyond death. does everybody go into the river and become a mad horrid ghost? like - is that everybody’s fate? how awful
ok so God DID resurrect the planets also. ? but like. then why are there resurrection beasts?
what does resurrection mean? and who killed the planets in the first place?
BECOMING NONE HOUSE, LEFT GRIEF
oh.....my god.
ARE YOU AND IANTHE BEING SAFE!!?!?!?! HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
HIS BODYGUARD IS THE DEVIL??
so the destruction of Earth somehow made God? as though it was something that simply followed from it
A.L. was destroyed in the first assault? Of an RB
so the RB’s were happily running off in the other direction until they decided to fuck around and kill their mates to become immortal and powerful - then the RB’s turned around and came towards them - which meant leaving the planets God had resurrected forever.
what the fuck god??? hahahahaa
God always seems so likeable goddamn.
Harrow is such a dramatic bitch. Affection??? JUST KILL ME!!! KILL ME!! LET ME SMASH THE GLASS SO I CAN KNEEL IN IT AND BLEED ALL OVER THE FLOOR!!!!
Harrow goes into her fun kid's game of not dying to traps.
But she instantly calls him father. OH MY GOD
HE DOESNT BELIEVE HER!!!
'then that will be your downfall' - is what Harrow said to Augustine AND IT WILL BECOME TRUE FOR THEM ALL
to be dismissed like that where it hurts most - to have God Dad dismiss her only slip of comfort her only pillar of truth in this crazy old world
'nobody had watched you leave'
SOMEBODY HAD - I love all the deliberate references to Gideon
Temporal lobe!!!! Again the temporal lobe!!!
So why was it again that Harrow refused to be locked in with the Emperor?
So isn't God gonna check out Harrow's temporal lobe? He's just gonna let that mystery go to its death?
WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKKKK
Muir what the fuck??!!!!!!!!
Oh it was.....a hallucination?
Always love how this dips into genuine horror sometimes
What's weird is that Lyctors seem made for the task of going into the river and killing Resurrection Beasts - instead of the other way around.
So say - that the sword somehow holds Gideon's soul (we've just learned that that's possible from Pal and also Ortus trying to get Pent to summon his grandma by his sword) - does it not make sense that Harrow 'for some reason' stabbing Cytherea's corpse with it transferred it to her? Or maybe it's SOMEHOW Anastasia if Ortus was macking on her. But Ortus thought HARROW had/was Anastasia.
IANTHE WANTS TO MARRY HARROW - HAHAHAHAAHAHAHA
Every fucking chapter doesn't make things any clearer. This is worse than Gideon the ninth
Hello???? Am I reading a canon alternate universe roleswap au??? What the FUCK is going on. This is like - if they hadn't gassed the 200 and her parents instead adopted Gideon for her clear necromantic gifts which nobody noticed somehow the other time round
I do love how Aiglamene was the sole source of slight comfort in Gideon's life. And Crux was Harrow's - apparently in any sequence of events.
Harrow is tumbling through timelines. But how can you do that just by messing with the lobe?
WHAT!! WHAT!!!
Is this...is this what I think it is??? Is thi
The fanfic roots are STRONG in this one. In fact I believe I've READ this fanfiction
Harrow's temporal fever dream (in the river?) HAD HER (Decidedly Not) VYING FOR 'HER DIVINE HIGHNESS' hand, which is either the Body or Gideon or both lololol. Seeing as the previous had Gideon as the main unnamed titled character - I bet it's Gideon ahahaaga
A fucking. COFFEESHOP AU. OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDD
We've had roleswap, 'ball' au, and coffee shop au populated by the ghosts of the dead LOLOL,
I knew it!! I knew that they were ghosts and that they were in the river!!
Ok so but when did Harrow shoddily create the bubble? When she adjusted her memories at the start? When is this. Ah Harrow has the same thought hahaa
So the stage is a - she was building her memories while sleeping?
Why is that she cannot access her lyctorhood like this...
I just realised that Harrow's mind made the party food taste like SALT based on Ianthe's cooking!!!! Hahahaha
THE NARRATOR IS GIDEON. But it doesn't sound like Gideon though
There's more to the work than simply preserving Gideon's soul though. There are next steps that Harrow prepared for that Harrow doesn't know about yet
Who was the sleeper and why was it in Harrows riverscape of memories that she ACCIDENTALLY??? made
Ok she sounds like Gideon NOW
Gideon no it's not because she didn't want you! It's because she wanted you to live!!!!!
And she succeeded....your soul is INTACT in her body!!!! You're protecting her with full consciousness!! How the fuck. And why didn't that happen before when she went to the bubble?
Are the ghosts of the contestants happy that they got pulled out of the River briefly? Or were they so briefly in there they couldn't remember?
She returned them to the RIVER???? is that really such a kind fate????
Something has gone wrong in the River - yeah because why r all these ghosts going insane and stoppering it up like slib
Do love how Muir has found a way to give these characters more screentime
I actually said 'oof' when Harrow screamed at Ortus - oof that really is embarrassing. GodDAMN Ortus you stepping up with the emotional support!
I've EVEN read the damn fanfic in which they switched bodies. My god.
A. L. apparently is thought to wander about still. I think she's the body....I do believe she's the body. That's why the Lyctors are scared of her
She thought - what. Mercy is talking about blood of Eden's commander. What is going onnnnn still!!!! Mercy is the traitor I guess. But how is blood of Eden connected to the ninth house and the body?
Why is Mercy awake on the mithraeum and not in the River anyways?
Gideon.... And the commander were in cahoots? So did A. L. and Anastasia an the body and the commander all have the same eyes?????
What the fuck is going on indeed.
Cytherea seems to have had a plan B for getting revenge on the Emperor. Or something had a plan B with her corpse as the main weapon.
If guns are so effective against people why aren't they still used.
The messages are from the commander. I.e. Gideon's mother. I.e. Anastasia? We never explicitly did learn how she met her end no? Gideon was convinced that Anastasia had taken the baby. It just seems incongruous how the Emperor spent like 80 years on the Erebos and the Lyctors were faffing about - meanwhile there was this drama going on in the last half century?
I love Abigail Pent. Love that I got to see more of her.
I'd honestly forgot that Judith was alive by the end of all of that shit
The sleeper is -the sleeper is Gideon's mother. Also. She's haunted by her mother. SOMEHOW. what the fuck? They couldn't drag her spirit back from the river they said!
'you wizards never learn' there's a whole modern regular sci fi world and culture out there! Or maybe it's just a. L.
Is it? Or is it Anastasia? Or is it the commander? Or are they the same thing?
The sleeper wants Harrow's body. Somehow invaded it - probably from the river? - which means its Anastasia or the commander. Which means that whatevers possessing Cytherea is someone else.
In retrospect - Harrow's coldness to Ianthe talking about - to what her - seemed nonsense at the time - in the very first part - doesn't quite fit.
Oh my fucking GOD Gideon is fighting Ianthe for messing around with her fucking girlfriend - who is HARROW, who actually, Ianthe wants to marry.
They just went from ramping up to a serious fight to Gideon dropping Corona's name and suddenly they're like - ah we got more important priorities actually.
Augustine's first thought at thinking a.l./the body (?) is in Harrow is John - and the Second is Joy!(mercy?)
'How I was gonna have to take showers with all your clothes on.' fuckin Gideon hahahaha
Wonder if Ianthe truly believes what she's saying - that Harrow was trying to rid hersel of Gideon. It's preposterous. It's just hurtful talk.
GIDEON REALLY THOUGHT THAT LOOK TO MEAN THAT HARROW DIDNT LOVE HER??? THIS IS A CONSTANT BARRAGE OF ALL THE ANGSTY DRAMATIC SHIT IVE BEEN YEARNING FOR
Oh my fucking god Gideon calling Ianthe out for being in love with Harrow in the most iconic way ufsojdjdodnd 'she wants the D - the D stands for dead'
Crazy brain-mutilated Harrow sure made it seem that way I can tell ya that!!
Hahahahahaha Ianthe remembering Harrows prudish Ortus/Cytherea shit. Amazing
Aw Gideon really went and fell right into the cavalier/bone mistress shit huh. And trying to shield Harrow - well as noted before - very necessary because harrow has been having a godawful miserable time - mostly because of herself.
Gideon appreciating Ianthe's pun xD
Love how neither of them position themselves as the love of Harrows life but instead as inexorably attached to her by the sheer role they play in her life - they don't dare aspire to what they think they can't get.
Muir realises this is gonna end up as a Gideon/Harrow(/theBody)/Ianthe ship right?
Oh WOW THIS IS AMAZING. nonius the legendary nonius!!! Come to protect Harrow!!!
For some reason the Sleeper can manipulate the rules of this River bubble and doesn't seem surprised about it
If all her cavaliers were this excited for death, she was definitely the problem.lololol. somehow Harrow, you inspired undying loyalty in even a person that you treated abominably
Yeah Harrow you slowpoke. If the Sleeper can adjust the rules - so can you
If the sleeper was not Harrow's invention - but planted itself - then they're very lucky it got to the ghosts that weren't actually there - first.
So it was the commander....a portrait in a shuttle of blood of eden - can only be the commander. And redhaired? There are too many red haired people in this book!!
It's nice how all these ghosts got to have lasting impact from beyond the grave
NONIUS KNEW ORTUS/GIDEON?
Ok so ....there's the bed of the River with stoma. But there might also be the other side.
Did Harrow really not account for steps beyond her plan to mutilate her brain?
Is this book really gonna go: fuck you Gideon will die anyway ?????
But.wait. the sleeper had a two-hander. Where did that go???
I don't get it. If they go into the river - won't they also go insane?
SO NYAH!!!!!???
Ok but - what? The Commander ALSO -somehow - took over Cytherea's body?
'did the ten billion give you that too' I KNEW CANAAN HOUSE HELD EVEN GRUESOMER EXPERIMENTS AND SACRIFICES THAN LYCTORHOOD. God is made of ten billion souls. I think they killed humanity on earth to spare it 'slow inexorable apocalypse' and used the power to make the Empire from the resurrected. There was an extremely vague implication by Teacher to the amount of souls violated in Canaan house in the first book.
So God knows the commander went for the ninth house? Firstly, how. I don't understand how Anastasia fits in here!!! It would explain though how the commander
So the commander found the ninth house - and she died right? They tried to call her spirit but couldn't. But she became a revenant?
Ah. God THREW the bomb.
A fuckin wake me up inside joke jskdjskdnd
So Mercy and Augustine ( not Gideon ?) had all turned against God? And they were working with the commander to -... Make a baby????? And then evacuate the houses???? (For when God dies - there being a risk that Dominicus would go out I guess)
Make a baby/body to lever the one who lies in the tomb into....?
Love how the book foreshadowed Mercy and Augustine manipulating and lying to God - and turns out they did that on much bigger scale
They....meant to kill the baby to break the blood ward?
'The woman who I was pretty sure was my mother, wearing the body of the woman I'd had a crush on, who in turn had been wearing the identity of a woman she'd murdered -' KSNFKDJDKFJJFC
So why did they want this consistently characterised as kindly and humane god dead?
GIDEON THOUGHT IT WAS HIS!!!! But he called Wake Anastasia then????
They really are the same???
Oh my god I know what they're gonna say. Gideon is the daughter of God. WHICH HARROWS FUCKIN ROYALTY AU FEVER RIVER DREAM FUCKING FORESHADOWED HAAHAHAHAHHAA
Isn't it fucking ironic that God told Harrow that - HE WANTED HER TO BE HIS??? WHILE GIDEON HIS ACTUAL DAUGHTER WAS SPINNING INSIDE HER CHEST LIKE A LITTLE NUCLEAR FUSION REACTOR
They've been trying to kill him for more than 500 years???? Did mercymorn actually genuinely learn the extremely fine knowledge of the body for THIS purpose? How many thousands of years ago did they decide to kill god?
A fucking DAD JOKE
GIDEON REMEMBERING HOW SHE USED TO TELL HARROW HOW HER OTHER PARENT MIGHT BE THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IN THE WORLD SO STOP PICKING ON HER
I am fucking DELIGHTED I AM SO GODDAMN OVERJOYED
It segues into a reminder of how shit their childhoods were and how their suffering had them lash out at each other endlessly and how it made Harrow suicidal and shit though - which is great
ALECTO'S EYES. THE A. FOR A. L.
A. L. The cavalier of God....but she walked. She had a body.
Ohhhhh. That's why they betrayed him. That age-old hurt. Ten thousand years old but still the bane of their existence, the seed of their madnesses. The loss of their cavaliers. Oh how did they manage to keep that from him?
I honestly thought - is Mercy saying she knows he killed humanity? But that's not what she couldn't have forgiven?
But why did he hide it? Why did he hide the perfect way? ('it would be easier' why???)
Ah. Yes. The expansion, why would the Emperor do that?
Uhhhhh. Couldn't Mercy have done that all along??????????????????????? Couldn't Mercy have killed God all along? That was both a trick and utterly sincere.
Augustine and Mercy were trying to do the right thing..... Mercy.... :'( Augustine was right. God is much less sentimental than he seems.
'im not even mad that you failed to either fix or put down Harrow' hm guess the constant kill quest HAD come from God after all. What a goddamn bitch of a man
What was the original plan? Unleash a. L. ? And then what? How would that help with the whole Dominicus going out problem?
Had God ever really thought to make up for all the bullshit he put his Lyctors through. He seems so affable and human but he's caused so much suffering. He's as good at manipulation at them - better!
The resurrection beast can't kill him, but he let his Lyctors die to them one by one anyway. So why??
Why are they punching each other in the River? They can use theorems right? God could blast Augustine to pieces same he did mercy?
Yes! It's true! Pyrrha and Gideon both exist in the same body - foreshadowed by his cavaliers build. There was something so fishy about it.
I love how Gideon has exactly the same response as me: what the fuck. Pyrrha??? Gideon??? What the fuck??? Why did they BOTH have an affair with their enemy??? So ok. Pyrrha stayed underground from Everybody for the thousand years. SOMEHOW their compartmentalisation let her pop up in his body regularly and not just when Gideon remembered her - because the hadn't fucked up his brain. But then how did THEY do that.
This absolutely galactic balsiness
The stoma thinks John is a resurrection beast. Might it be.....because he's..... A revenant. A 10 billion souled kinda- revenant ? A bit like.....Harrow is? Which is why he felt kin to her? Which is why he compared her creation to Resurrection?????I've really gotta reread those messages from commander wake.
A fucking jail for mother meme. Jail for one thousand years. Gideon how do you know this one????
I KNEW Ianthe would do that. Knew it. She doesn't want the system to die. Coronabeth is still out there. Well guess what - she's on the opposite side babe. Ok I realised that Gideon's mum apparently stuck to Gideon and then the sword? But also did Harrow manage to break the blood ward because of of her proximity to Gideon? Did Harrow uhhhh get put into a pocket in the river? But the emperor wasn't murdered!!! Fuckin chapters kept lying. They're on a hold planet. Finally - we meet the people. Alecto and Camilla and Corona? And Judith.? Did Alecto somehow do a time twisty around to come save Gideon at that moment in the river? Once again nothing much more is clear.
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