#i would put him in a little cuck box and shake him all about

[jrueships]

bruh

For a second i thought this just said bruh LMAO it made me laugh but then that joy was zapped away when i saw stefon diggs .

OKAY. UMMMM. LETS TALK ABOUT THIS....

By this i mean the most horny photos in that very horny photoshoot, so basically almost all of them 😭 i tried picking the most horny cus i didn't wanna exceed pic limit, but i may have bcs stef could not stop sl*tting

ANyWAYS. THIS PHOTO. It's kinda... it's a little... it's giving scene kid.... he IS the 'Emo Girl' you fell in love with. Allen fell in love with. He IS the leather jacket leather pants cool guy tattoo artist working in the tattoo parlor next to Josh Allen's flowershop and he wants EVERYONE to know it !!!!! If his mind must be tortured by this main character romance dream au he is living in, EVERYONE must be tortured by it. The green... socks ???? THE CUT OFF PANTS (THAT CAN ZIP UP HIGHER TO REVEAL MORE LEG FOR SOME REASON???????? A LITTLE WH*RISH BUT OK???) TO SHOW THE GREEN SOCKS???? It's the way every piece of clothing is meticulously crafted to fit his punkjock aesthetic. He's not a diva, he just knows what he wants and how to get it Always .

.... i think this is the photo that made me go 'oh. So THIS is the thot photoshoot.' And this was literally the second photo like. OK. This really says something. What it says? I may not be allowed to say on a good tuesday eve. But like. What was the.. strategy here. What was the PURPOSE? HIS SLIGHTLY PARTED LIPS SHOWING GLIMPSES OF PEARLY WHITES???? THE TIRED LEAN AGAINST ANY OBJECT HE CAN FIND? W H * R E ‼️‼️

. You've got to be fuckin with me at this point. Not a smile nooo this is his. I don't even know if i should describe it. Expression. But this is a gesture of Want. A MAJOR one. The first photo was a little goofy a little cool edgy pose to stick out in the group photo yearbook whatever stick the tongue out 😋LOOOL 😝😝😝! but THIS???? THIS WAS. A SHIFT. He's like. Mentally role-playing a steamy session with himself. The brother thirsty .

I've said Enough about This. But if you didn't get my point from the first ones, here's the hammering evidence.

His hole spirit shyguy sweater... the little hands behind the back.. knee slightly bent.. toe pointing dainty at the ground (probably).. the scrutinizing squint downward nose upturned... what more can i say that the details don't convey ?

Just the sweet innocent Girl Next Door who DEFINITELY didn't take THOSE pictures in the leather pants oh NOO this is BABYGIRL stef. He has done no wrong EVER !!!! Jus a liltf.. guy pleading eyes emoji. He just roleplayed his redemption arc all by himself.

Sitting like this. With these ugly ass cut off zebra print pants. Gayass .

If he fits, he sits !

[reeleev]

The Banging from Above - Kiho

Summary: One night, Kihyun gets fed up with his hot neighbor from upstairs banging around. But, what he finds when he goes to complain is most certainly not what he expects… 6D��h.*

Word Ct: 987

AO3 Link

Kihyun just about screams in frustration, throwing down his highlighter as he glares up at his ceiling. The banging noises from the dorm above echo throughout his room, accompanied by the sound of blaring EDM music. He swears to god… How can anyone in their right mind have a raging party the night before finals???

He takes a deep breath, burying his face in his hands as he just tries to clear his head. He knows the exam stress is getting to him, so he really shouldn’t try to talk to anyone right now. He’d even managed to scare Changkyun off earlier with his frantic state.

But, this constant noise is so damn distracting... and he's got finals tomorrow!!! AT EIGHT IN THE DAMN MORNING!!!!

He can't even thump on the roof of his room, either, as that'd probably start a war with his upstairs neighbor, and that's most certainly not how he wants to spend the next semester... He'll just ignore it. That's all he can do. Surely it won't last too much longer, right?

Just as the hopeful thought comes to Kihyun's mind, a particularly loud thump resounds, and the student has had it. He stands up so quickly his chair falls backwards, and stomps out of his room. His roommate, Minhyuk, glances up at him lazily from the tiny couch.

"Where are you going?" he asks, his raspy voice a bit drowsy due to the lateness of the hour. Kihyun huffs out a breath of annoyance as he slips on his shoes and puts on his coat.

"Do you not hear that cuck???" he demands, glancing up at the ceiling. "The guy upstairs is stomping around like crazy. I swear, he's just throwing down bowling ball after bowling ball to the beat of that stupid music..." Minhyuk blinks, shrugging as he turns his attention back to the boxing match on the television.

"Whatever," he says. "Just don't get beat up. I don't feel like driving to the store to get first-aid supplies." Kihyun waves a dismissive hand at the oh-so touching concern from his same-age friend, and then leaves the dorm without another word.

 His breath comes out in aggravated, short little puffs of smoke as he takes the stairs instead of the elevator. That thing is creepy as hell, and he'd much rather appear at his neighbor's door blushing and slightly out of breath than completely composed if that meant avoiding it. So, with his rage and need to get out of the biting cold of late November fueling him, he takes the stairs two at a time to the second floor of their dorm building.

 Hoseok almost doesn't hear the knocking that comes from his front door over his own music. He's in the middle of reworking the choreography he has to perform in lieu of a final for his class tomorrow, and the steps he's just thought up are quite difficult. But, it's always better to risk getting a bad grade for a gutsy routine than perform something only mediocre and get an A, in his opinion.

He pauses the music, frowning at noticing something slightly off-beat. When he realizes its coming from his door, he gulps and scrambles to answer, worried that it could be the RA. It wouldn't be the first time he'd gotten such a visitor. His neighbors don't particularly appreciate his music blaring into the wee hours of morning. Not that he can blame them, really, but it can't be helped. He has to have his music to do work for his dance classes.

So, needless to say he's quite surprised to see a blushing little man, heaving slightly out in the cold.

"I live in the dorm below you," the shorter states simply, without even saying hello. "I'm trying to study for finals, and your music and partying is distracting. Could you turn it down... please?" It seems the 'please' is more of an afterthought, but Hoseok is too embarrassed right now to be indignant. Or, at least, that's what he's telling himself right now, and that it most definitely isn't because of the stranger's adorably red, puffy cheeks.

"Um, th-thorry," Hoseok stutters out, bowing slightly. "I didn't mean to be so loud, I was just practicing for my dance final tomorrow. I'll turn it down."

"Oh..." the stranger mutters, seeming surprised. "Thanks, I guess. I didn't realize you were doing it for a class. I just thought you were having a raging party or something." He chuckles to no one in particular, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. Hoseok shuffles on his feet, unsure what to say to that. He could say the truth, that no one he knows is really into raging parties, but that'd sound a bit lamer than he wants to come across to the other. "Um, sorry, I didn't introduce myself. I'm Kihyun, Yoo Kihyun."

Hoseok quickly offers a hand to shake as he replies with, "I'm Shin Hoseok. It's nice to meet you."

Kihyun takes the hand, shaking it with a bemused light to his eyes. He hadn't realized the neighbor in question would be so damn attractive, or else he'd have come up here to complain a long time ago.

"Well, good luck on your final," he says, smirking as he drops his grip on the other's hand. "Maybe we'll run into each other again~"

Hoseok gulps thickly, nodding adamantly. Kihyun chuckles under his breath, raising a single brow in intrigue as he turns and embarks on the way back to his own dorm. Hoseok watches him go for as long as he can, kneading on his bottom lip as the shorter rounds the corner.

He closes his own door and sits on the couch for a short break, massaging the hand Kihyun had touched with his other. He has a feeling he'll be seeing that particular neighbor again, if the stranger has anything to say about it...

[fmlfpl]

Lineup Lamentations - GW3

Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s for the week!

—

WALSH

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Robinson & Aubameyang

IN: Pukki & De Bruyne

CalRob riperino

As shouted on the pod, I did these early to catch the rises with no midweeks it felt fine to do. As much as I am sad to bin Aubz it just seemed like the best place to get money while also addressing a massive problem in my XI - the countymaker Cal.

It looks foolish to continue going without Kevin given how he's looked at the price he's at. As pod partner mentioned - pure value here.

Pukki was also talked about at length on the pod so nothing really to add to that. Just looks a strong long term pick.

GK:

Pope (wol)

Pope at Wolves seems pretty great. Could easily haul here since Wolves suck and are really just a bus + 2 attackers. Up the Pope.

DEF:

Alexander-Arnold & Robertson (ARS)

Standing by Trent and Robbo in a tough on paper fixture for a clean. It's definitely sketchy, but I'm going to still stick with the lads here for a few more games at least.

Doesn't feel like a place where I'll really be getting ahead fo the field by fucking around with them when I have other more pressing issues in my team so here we are. Attacking returns always an option as well so feels fine.

Montoya (SOU)

Montoya is actually getting his first start for me this weekend home to Soton. Not really sure what to make of this game in the battle of the beach towns but it's a good on paper fixture so we'll see how it goes for Monty. Still playing as a wingback so maybe a cheeky assist could come in.

Söyüncü (shu)

Finally, soy sauce umlaut man Soyuncu is at SheffU in a pretty good defensive fixture in my view. I expect this one to be tight and Leic might get their fair share of set pieces in this one...starting Soy feels great.

MID:

De Bruyne (bou)

New friend Kevin is in to increase my City player count from 0 to 1. 1 is better than 0 I think.

Salah (ARS)

Mo has a nice normal week of chill vibez before Arsecast roll up to Livp. I like that people are selling Mo. I have no plans on removing him anytime soon.

Martial (CRY)

Tony M has been fantastic and I am well pleased with myself that I started on him. Feels like a long term hold and United finally have their first good fixture of the season. I expect him to keep banging.

Pérez (shu)

Finally, Ayoze gets a stay of execution after two blanks in two. I'm not expecting much from him this weekend, but if Br0dge would play an attacking lineup that would be a nice start. He looked to be getting into reasonably good positions last game so will keep an eye to see if that keeps up. I still believe in Ayoze but a good performance with even just an assist would do a lot to calm my nerves on him.

FWD:

Kane (NEW)

Kane with a big game this weekend. If he can outscore Raz by a bit I will be flying. One time Harold you cuck don't cuck me.

Pukki (CHE)

Next to Kane is Pukki. Rough on paper fixture but in reality the game should be open based on what both of these teams have shown us so far.

CAP:

Kane (NEW)

It's gotta be Kane. I don't own Raz so it's not really in question. Hopefully Spurs just dominate and Kane gets in there with a double return. Rose hasn't been swimming around in the box much..maybe he'll trick VAR for a pen15 this game? One time please, dealer.

—

ALON

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Wilson

IN: Pukki

Kinda weird to just follow the herd and auto transfer out Callum after he’s returned in 2/2 for me but Bournemouth don’t look very good and of course the City fixture weighs heavily in the decision as well. Also the Pukki train, as mentioned on the pod, feels like it actual comes from a real place (the team, the eye-test, the previous success, etc etc...).

It’s an extremely slow and passive move for me but like I said on the pod, and Walsh had to say it all back to me as I was panicking last night, I have my eyes set on the right guys for next week. I’m just taking my time and riding a few good fixtures and making my moves soon...

At least I hope I’m being passive and not just scared. Sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference.

GK:

Ederson (bou)

I find that I can’t root for City despite owning the guys in FPL. Owning Eddy is like a job for me - I’m just clocking in... Maybe I’ll get points, but also if Harry Wilson wants to bang one in from 30 yards I’m down for that.

No Stones this week so an Ota red card is right around the corner too.

DEF:

van Dijk & Gomez (ARS)

Real tough clean shout here. We’ll see how attacking of a lineup and a setup Arsenal go for... My gut tells me that Emery will learn from last season’s spanking at Anfield to go a little less gung-ho but who the fuck knows.

Not expecting a clean at all but it’s possible.

I think Gomez will be straight back in after he was rested from the Supercup 120′ nightmare... If not then he’s another major issue that I need to deal with next week.

Söyüncü (shu)

This seems early doors like it might be one of the best fixtures for a cleansheet shout... I don’t think Sheff U. are terrible but they are pretty conservative and Leicester are pretty tight and good. I expect Leicester to totally control this match.

Digne (avl)

Villa have been putting up pretty solid attacking numbers and decent attacking performances. I do not expect a clean in a match where Villa will feel they need at least a point to get their season going, Villa Park is going to be insane.

All that aside Everton have been cleaning for fun and Villa’s defense can definitely be ripped to shreds by Digne so let’s cheers to that. Digne to Rich please fucking god.

MID:

Salah (ARS)

Pretty ok attacking fixture for Mo and the boys.

Mo got absolutely no service whatsoever against Southampton - for example Trent passing to Mo did not happen one time - everything was up the left through Robbo and Mané... I expect a lot more action with a week off for the team.

Sterling (bou)

After dropping points last week I fear for what Pep’s boys will do to Bournemouth this week.

Pérez (shu)

Extremely tough start.

Also don’t feel like he’s gotten a fair shake playing super wide being asked to do things that he can’t do or at least has never done at this level... It’s been a feels bad man so far for Ayoze but I believe in the player and Brodge and the team.

While Sheffield United are tough to break down and Leicester have home Bourney next week, it may be do or die / now or never time for Ayoze in FPL.

Richarlison (avl)

Rich has gotten chances in both matches so far and just not put’em away... Away Villa is his time. Come on you Rich.

FWD:

Pukki (CHE)

I straight up agree with what Walsh said on an open match above and also add to that potentially no Kante is just even more open for Pukki and the boys.

I actually fear for Chelsea here and I think this is a trap game for them. Norwich can slice them to bits on the break if the boys are up for it... I love Norwich.

Deulofeu (WHU)

Another rough start for Team Alon with Gerry D...

Created the best chance of the match last week but also didn’t take a shot... Watford in general from the end of last season and through how they’ve started off this season look baaaaaaaaad. Like, relegation levels of bad.

They need to figure out something and I hope it’s not sacrificing Gerry D but who the fuck knows.

West Ham might be the best attacking fixture in the league for FPL? They’re up there. So if Gerry keeps his place then I really do expect points. Praying for points... Here we go we’ll see.

CAP:

Sterling (bou)

Anything less then a 0-3 would stun me from City this weekend.

And Raz should have a big day.

Easy call for me with no Kane.