#i would love to draw something different since Im too lazy and Im too afraid haha

[istisah]

She angr- Irritated Pleas not repost thank

[act-addict-actors-matchups]

@anonymous said,

hello !! can i get a matchup? im a pisces, infp & a ravenclaw. i am 5'0.5 and have medium length black wavy hair and brown eyes. i like to try new things though i can be shy & hesitant sometimes. i like things to remain light-hearted but i can be serious too when required. i have a different type of persona for every person,, if im comfortable with someone i get really really talkative and bubbly. (1)

also im like super addicted to my phone,, it's hard for me to even function w/o it. im pretty much a night owl and my sleeping schedule is messed up. i really like fashion, listening to music, travelling, photography, video games & SWEETS. I don't think im very good at comforting others but im a great listener. I'm super lazy & a big procrastinator. (2)

I cannot call or text anyone at all without dying like every second unless we're close. Usually, if i don't get my space i get really annoyed. I'm really stubborn too. I don't really have a hobby except listening to music, reading manga, webnovels or drawing? im so sorry this was so long thank you tho!! (3)

✧ Thank you so much for requesting a matchup anonnie. I don’t know when you send this but I hope you’ll see this and like it. 💓

I’d match you with: . . .

➜ HOW YOU TWO FIRST MET ; You were an intern at his company. One day, while everyone else was at lunch break, you were struggling to finish the assignment you were assigned which was due tomorrow and it didn’t help you at all that the person who was supposed to help you weren’t doing their jobs at all. With a groan, you pushed yourself off your office seat and made your way to the kitchen to get yourself a cup of coffee. It looked like you were staying overtime anyway. While walking towards your destination, you heard the background music of your favorite game and stopped in your tracks. At first you thought you were imagining the sound since it’s been a while since you last played it and there was literally no one else in the building aside from you but after listening more carefully for a while you were sure that someone in the office was indeed playing your favorite game. Careful not to make any noise, you basically tiptoed to the source of the sound only to be greeted with dark blonde locks. The celebrity of the company himself, the person who earned the trust of his coworkers and superiors alike like it was nothing, the one and only Chikasagi Itaru was playing YOUR favorite game. His pink eyes, which reminded you the stone Star Ruby, was glued on the phone in his hand deep in concentration under his bangs. You didn’t even realize you were in a daze until a curse left his lips and he threw his head back in frustration. That is when Itaru noticed that you were here and saw the whole thing. Now, don’t get him wrong, normally he wouldn’t even think of gaming while he was at work but there was this rare event he absolutely had to participate and rank. His game addict instincts basically took control over his mind. With a small smile on your lips you approached him and offered to help while he was desperately trying to think of any excuse to get him out of this situation. You knew you weren’t going to participate in this event no matter how much you wanted to anyway so you might as well use your skills to help someone in need, right? After convincing him to lend you his phone, which took a lot of effort ngl, you cleared the level he was stuck on with ease and handed him his phone back with a smug grin on your face. That was the moment when you became a gaming goddess in his eyes and as a thank you, he helped you with that assignment and miraculously, you managed to finish it before the deadline and started a new friendship with the hardcore gamer.

➜ PERSONALITY COMPATIBILITY ; First of all, you two compliment each other in a “we’re so similar I get why you’re like that”-way. You two can relate to each other with pretty much everything. He also has two different personas although it’s a bit different from yours but whenever Itaru is in professional mode, he is gentle and charming like a prince who genuinely cares about others but he somewhat maintains his distance and likes to keep his private life to himself but when he’s in home mode, he is not afraid to curse and be rude who also starts to get a bit lazy and outright competitive. I feel like he’s the type of person who would procrastinate as well so i’m just imagining you two lying down and telling each other that you should get up soon but none of you actually makes an attempt to do so.Cue you two rushing to finish whatever you were supposed to do afterwards. Don’t worry about not getting any space because Itaru is not the clingy type unless he’s like, really tired from work but who wouldn’t want to cuddle with their lover time to time? Also, I feel like he can manage your stubbornness because he’s a pretty chill guy.

➜ SHARED ACTIVITIES ; Like I said before, you two are basically two peas in a pot so if you really want to you can manage to do everything together. The fact that you like video games is a big plus in the relationship. Sometimes you two just game until the sun rise on your day offs since both of you are night owls and your sleeping schedule is basically nonexistent. If you’re in need for an extra player, Itaru personally drags Banri in your gaming sessions as well so you’re also good friends with the high-spec delinquent. Of course, he will take you out from time to time on normal dates like a mall, arcade, fun fair or a expensive restaurant, but this generally happens when you’re celebrating an important day like anniversaries or birthdays. I can picture you two sitting at a bakery, enjoying whatever you’ve ordered and passionately discussing if the newly released gamer keyboard is actually worth buying or not or going to an arcade and compete to see who can get the most tickets at the end of the day. I can also picture him dropping by your house with your favorite desserts after you’ve accomplished something amazing at work. In short, you’re literally the only person he’s willing to go all out for and he wouldn’t want to have it any other way.

➜ ZODIAC COMPATIBILITY ; Itaru’s birthday is on April 24 which makes him a Taurus. The connection between a Taurus and a Pisces will be built on sheer love and adoration for each other. The earth sign and water sign are complementary to each other. They are both caretakers of those around them and will thus nurture each other, and their relationship, with immense devotion and absolute dedication. Taurus helps Pisces to stay grounded and to focus on the reality. Pisces, on the other hand, soothes the rigidity of the Taurus to unwind themselves from the constant stress of expectations. This aids the bull breathe a little lighter and infuses their with self-assurance and optimism. This relationship will survive the test of time if both parties involved have unbreakable trust in each other and nurture that connection they have painstakingly built over the years. They must remember to be honest and committed to their partner through all times. If natural communication flows between them like clockwork, this will be a beautiful love story with a prominent tag of 'happily-ever-after' pinned right to it.

[clownbeep]

This is gonna be kinda brutal. But I want to put it into writing

Big vent/whats been going on

Hah... I guess this is like my life story or some shit...

Trigger warning ahead.. Depression and a bit of gore/suicide talk so if you are sensitive to that please, for your own sake and mental state you might not want to continue.

For those who dont want to hear a pretty dark vent, I understand.

And those who are just scrolling by feel free to scroll past. I just personally want to get this out.

If you have dealt with emotional neglect/abuse and need to know it isnt in your head this might be the post.

By writing this it feels like hopefully someone else will read this and realise certain things are NOT healthy.

If you are questioning if you are being emotionally neglected/abused (im speaking in a parental sense but even romantically or sexually) im not someone to give you answers, but the fact you are questioning it raises some red flags. In a healthy relationship you dont wonder those things.

Sorry for the long prelude but heres what I wanted to say

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.

.

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Ever since I was young, ive had bad ADHD, manic bipolar/depression, and sensory issues.

I was diagnosed around 13 I believe. My family (I didnt realise it then) always showed pity. Like I was some wild animal that couldnt be tamed and there was nothing they could do. Id do and say stupid attention seeking things just to try and get a shred of empathy.

My family didnt care.

When I was in the hospital for a suicide attempt regaurding pills and my liver had a chance of failing.. None of my family members cried over me. But a family friend. Someone not. Even. Related. Wept over me.

My family didnt care.

I cant say they never cared. They give me food water and luxuries like internet and a phone. For that I am grateful.

But in many other ways they have hurt me faar more than helped.

Once I got out of a short term stay in an inpatient mental facility I desperately needed contact with anyone who would care for me.

I have a younger sister, quite young probably around 7 at the time. She was a close friend of mine for that time. Id hang out with her so often to fill the gap in love it felt my family didnt give. One day I walked into the dining room and overheard my mother and father talking to my little sister. They told her to keep away because I wasnt "stable" because I was "dangerous" and could give her bad Ideas. And with one single action my only friend at the time and way to find happiness was taken away.

My family did not care.

When I stay in bed every day for months on end not knowing which day ill snap and end it all.... I get called lazy.

My family did not care

When I beg for medication to make me a functional human being they brush me off for years on end. Im losing my grip. I can barely remember things that have happened last week because I try so hard to forget everything its my automatic response to everything.

When I cant get to sleep because all of the memories come flooding back and im hit by wave after wave of horrific memories and the feeling if worthlessness... When I cant watch any videos or read posts about families because it brings on unwanted memories and emotions....

Is it me being dramatic then?

When you hear your family openly mocking and laughing about how stupid and dramatic and fake trans people are... How weird and unnatural and mentally insane these people are not knowing they are the very reason grsm and trans suicides are so high...

Am I a liar now? Am I insane?

When I tried to talk to them about my mental health issues. They took my only way of contact and made me feel like it was my own fault.

My family didnt care.

When I was nearly passed out shaking in a bathtub covered in wounds and blood all over... They showed pity, then lectured me for an hour for not telling them or for being impulsive and basically cleaned my wounds and sent me into my room.

My family didnt care.

Yes. I do agree, they cleaned my wounds, the physical side of showing care. However emotionally they were not there.

When my father drinks so heavilly every day he is home from work that he forgets half the things he tells you and can barely function.. They lecture my older sister for having a glass of wine (legal age)

They did not care.

My sister (23) tried for so many years to cling to what little attention she would get by getting good grades and going to college... She realised that it changed nothing about how my family felt toward her.... She snapped.

My family did not care.

She starves herself for a disease she does not have, she uses religion as an exuse to be one of the biggest christian extremists I personally know. Half the days she doesnt eat... Other days she burns book and gets rid of items for being demonic.

My lovely sister used to be kind and quite normal. However she couldnt find comfort in what little live her family gave. Starved for care she turned to religion to un unhealthy degree. Finding any way to keep her mind busy. Now I worry she will end up in the hospital for weighing so little.

My family did not care.

My oldest sister (27) Is married to a continuously cheating husband who she keeps letting back into her life. She was raised with a failing marrige and doesnt seem to see when she should call it quits.

Not to mention her husband has touched someone legally under the age of concent. Did she report him to the authorities? No.

All of these horrific things stemming from bad parenting. Unhealthy relationships and neglect.

Neglect emotionally can cause just as bad things as physical neglect. They are both horrifically dangerous in different ways.

These are the only big things I can remember... Basically age 15 and below are a complete blur to me and I cant remember much of it without thinking for a looong time. Even then I cant remember a lot of it... I feel like ive lost my whole damn childhood. And it hurts more than if they had just hit me or physically harmed me.

Im not underplaying physically harm. But in my personaly opinion I would rather my family have beaten me badly because at least then id have an easier way to prove to people how severe the abuse was. You can see bruises and confirm broken bones... But years of feeling completely useless and being shut off from most of the world other than the internet... It fucks you up in a way I dont think can be healed.

I dont know if I can ever love myself or... Remember things. Its terrifying to think Ill post this and a few weeks later probably not even rememner unless its brought up. Or meeting people and having conversations... And they are just... Gone.

Gone.

I suppose the biggest reason im writing this is well... In the future I dont want to forget in some ways.. I want like to be 100× as awesome knowing itll start as soon as im out of here..

If I dont have anything to compare it too then what is the point?

Ive layed out basically most of what I remember

A large amount of time I look around and nothing registers... Everything is familiar but I cant remember anything for a moment or two.. I feel like my memory is slipping so fast and im terrified.. I cant do anything to stop it and I cant make my mood be stable without the medication my family cant be bothered to get ...

I suppose this is a bit of a vent. I know its kind of everywhere and unorganized..

If im honest.. Tumblr is the only place where people have given me a home I wish I had..

I came out as trans here... Everyone was so damn supportive.. I didnt say anything but I cried hard and the kindness.. It was amazing.. It was such a jarring difference to how I feel when I say anything in real life.

Ive met friends here and ive had some much fun here. If youve stuck around this far thank you so much.. If you didnt I dont blame you.

I just wanted to share what has been flashing in my head these past few days.. It hurts a lot and ive even considered suicide recently..

Im trying hard. As hard as I can.. I have no escape though.

I cannot leave home. I cannot escape. Im not being dramatic.

I

CANT

LEAVE

And its terrifying because I know without medication or at least being somewhere AWAY from family.... I feel like im going to break soon.

I dont want to do anything stupid.. But some days I cant think straight and do things that harm myself and its not good. Its not okay. Im aware that I need help but I have no idea where to go/turn.. I have no ID or drivers liscence.. I have no transportation to and from a job to get money so I can leave... I live in the middle of nowhere.... I just..

I dont want to lose touch. I dont want to do anything bad.. I want to be functional.. I want to do more than eat and sleep my life away because I have nothing else to do..

Im so damn sick and tired of this all.. And at times I really do feel like there is only one way out.

Its always there and I just feel like one of these days im gonna be pushed over the edge and not be thinking clearly enough to stop it.

Im thinking semi clearly right now which is my im posting this.. Because im afraid and alone.

I have nowhere to go irl I have no friends Irl i just have tumblr and media and thats it. I dont expect anyone to be able to help I just wanted to write this so anyone knows what happens if I leave media..

If I tell my family my issues they will blow me off again for the 11th time or so (not exaggerated)

And if I do something to get sent to the hospital and get the help I need the cycle will continue with them being pissed and me getting sent home in a month or less anly for my family relationships to get worse..

Im spiraling fuether and further and I cant keep up the facade of being fine. I need help. And i have no way to get it. Ive just been suffering for years...

Sitting around and doing nothing but using your phone or drawing or whatever sound fun in theory... But if thats all youve been able to do for years with little to no real life social contact its gonna mess with your head... I dont want to be a shut in... I just

I dont know what to do.

Im sorry for rambling. I will most likely delete this later feeling embarrassed I posted this...

Im just tired..

[algrenion]

#addiction_tw #depression #overdose_tw

before the overdose/detox hybrid officially kicked, i took one pill of nefopam and it got me so hyperactive. SO hyperactive. Before i knew it id taken maybe up to twenty in a night a few days later and i didnt even realise it. I’d just sort of went on autopilot. I remember doing it. I remember my teeth grinding and my body seizing up on me all night, and i remember reaching off the side of the bed to get more and more and more in hopes it would bring me DOWN probably - but by then i couldnt remember taking the last one, every time i took one id forget i took one five minutes before. It felt like hours in between each pill, the pain was so intensse. I was too afraid to ask for help. I didnt know what it was doing to me. I thought it was supposed to be like an opioid without being one. I guess i hadnt done enough research, i was so desperate to get off codeine that to an extent, it didnt matter. Nothing mattered more than getting past my addiction but i didnt want to bother people with it, so i suffered in silence till my body shut down.

I think i was too late. I dont know if i’ll be the same again but i hope i can recover. All i know is for a month now pretty much, since it happened, every morning i wake up and one side of my body is slack. I feel like my joints keep trying to pop and rip away from my body. My hands move on their own. My ears always hurt, i have migraines. Sometimes my face goes numb and my eye or both eyes go lazy and i cant control them.

I really fucked up this time. Drawing hurts. Thinking hurts. Being creative hurts, because i feel like im not going anywhere that i can express that creativity. Like i’ll be housebound. 

And stress makes it so much worse, which is why going back to the college where i went to classes that... kind of sucked the life out of me, stifled my creativity, and where i felt nobody believed i was really disabled based on how some people would talk to me, sounds like too much to bare. I don’t want to go back. I love some of my tutors but i look at others and all i can think of is how that course was sold to me as something that it wasn’t. I thought it was going to be my way to finally make it up the ladder into finding work and a place to be happy with myself and my life with Conor. I also know i’m not the only kid on that course that felt ruined by its lack of flexibility.

Instead i feel like it vacuumed me dry of my passion till all i could do is just sit at my computer and hope that Conor was doing something he was happy with. Till it wasnt worth even trying to complete my assignments because i knew the feedback would be “Oh, I don’t know what’s so different about this course to what you did in Glasgow, but none of this is good enough.” (No joke, this was said to me)

i feel like i have very little to live for anymore. Like the only value i have left is the concepts that i’ve fostered and hoped to do something with, except that i’m losing my output for those ideas. I’m losing my skillsets. I’m losing my passion, because i can’t take it anywhere.

 All that makes me happy now is thinking that maybe, with my encouragement, Conor will find a field to work in that he’s really, truly happy in. Because what really makes me happy now is seeing the smile on his face when he makes a drawing or a song that he’s genuinely proud of. I just want to find him a ticket out of this shitty self-loathing business.

[boysandsuicide]

1-100 😜

First of also sorry for my English. I know it’s bad 🙄 these are actually hella fucking cute y'all1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?Idk. Idon’t eat often cereal haha2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?Sometimes yes , but mostly not 3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?Starbucks Card , handkarechiefs, paper uns other stuff 4: how do you take your coffee/tea? I love black coffe, but also with milk and suggar. Same with tea . Like it depends in what mood I am and which kind of coffe/Tee it is.5: are you self-conscious of your smile?No 6: do you keep plants?Nope. I even made a cactus die😂7: do you name your plants?No 🤔8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?I think none. Just tumblr haha9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?Yes, but only when no one is around10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?I have like 1000 different sleep positions every night 11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends?I don’t have really good friends, but the most ones are about people from school in Russian 12: what’s your favorite planet?Never thought about it 13: what’s something that made you smile today?A friend,whom I don’t know very long ,but I really like haha14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?I think like a ikea catalog 😂15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!Uranus is tilted on its side16: what’s your favorite pasta dish?I think Bolognese but this also depends on my mood . All in all I love food and eat nearly everything 🙄 17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?Platin blond ,but many said ,that it would look good and so i didn’t dare18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.I think there’s nothing 19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it?I don’t habe one . I just draw or write something during school,when I’m bored af 20: what’s your favorite eye color?I depends on the person but I like grey-green 21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. I don’t have one 22: are you a morning person?Definitely not 23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?Netflix , sleeping or reading 24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?There’s somebody from tumblr whom I don’t know a very long time , but I think one day I could tell him everything 25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into?None 26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit?It changes like every ½ year , but now it are my black vans 27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor?Purple airwaves 28: sunrise or sunset?Both but I like more sunsets. Sunrise it too early in the morning 29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing?Idk haha30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared?I get often scared ,but i remember , when I was small and I was flying somewhere and there was turbulence and I thought that we will all die haha31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.I like socks because they’re covering foot but I have only black and white ones and yes I do sleep with socks 32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.I don’t remember something happened while I was with friends after 3AM. This even didn’t happened often 33: what’s your fave pastry?I love cake but I’m working at bakery so I don’t really like pastry 🙄34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?It was called karkusha(Russian ) it was a bird puppet and I got it on a flight and my grandmother always played with me. It’s somewhere in our flat but idk where 35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?Nope 36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now?Idk haha 37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean?I like it when my room is clean but I’m a messy person 38: tell us about your pet peeves!I don’t have pet :((((39: what color do you wear the most? Black, than white and grey 40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you?I got and gold chain from my grandmother , but I’m not wearing it because it breaks often and it doesn’t really having a meaning from me . Only that it’s from my grandmother 41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?Scythe and night school 42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!Starbucks 😍😍😍😍43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with?I never did this but i want to :(44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything?Idk. Last time I felt , that I can be who I am , was with a friend ( I hope is one , because ideally like him , we just don’t know eachother for a long time ) His name is Noel and he also has tumblr 🙄 45: do you trust your instincts a lot?I depends on the situation but often i do 46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. Idk hahaha47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?Oysters . I hate it and the smell 48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?Spiders , falling somewhere down from a high place - I’m still afraid of both today; dying - I’m not afraid anymore of dying 49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?Nope and it was a long time ago I bought one so idk 50: what’s an odd thing you collect? Different stuff but I collect flight tickets but I lose them in my room 😂 and I collect nearly everything 51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them?There’s no52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far?Too many 😂 53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? I watched None of them 54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?I think some school-friends on Friday - we got our certificate 55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?Idk 56: what are some things you find endearing in people?It depends on if like Theo person or not . But I like when someone truly smiles a lot and cares about someone 57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? I like this song and it made me fell like sad or something like that but also happy haha🙄58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why?And again no friends haha59: what’s your favorite myth?There’s no . But maybe aliens ?🤔🤔60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? I like Russian poetry . Pushkin 61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?I got many stupid ones and gave many stupid ones , but I think the stupidest givt was a bottle opener which looked like a bottle cover haha but again I am/ wasn’t invited often to birthdays or something like that 62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?Nope . I’m allergic against fruits 63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?Nope I’m not . Just put like the first , second etc. Part of a book series together 64: what color is the sky where you are right now?It’s dark blue/ black . At home 65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? Yes a girl who I know a long time but we like drifted apart and a boy from tumblr whom I saw some days ago ( I know it’s not a long time, but I miss him)66: what would your ideal flower crown look like?Pollen allergy 😂67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?I like them when I’m st home with a hot drink and read book/ watch Netflix or a good friend is around me and you can talk about deep topics haha68: what’s winter like where you live? Like shit . It’s rainy and maybe there’s snow for 2 minutes but then it melts :(. But it’s typical german winter and it’s often „very called“69: what are your favorite board games? I like monopoly70: have you ever used a ouija board? Nope 71: what’s your favorite kind of tea?I love bubble tea , but also black , green tea or some with fruits . It’s depends on my mood. 72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it?Sone things yes . Some I will still remember in 100 years 73: what are some of your worst habits?There to many . Some of them : I am very annoying and clinging 74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.I don’t have good friends (now)75: tell us about your pets!I wanna a cat since I’m 5 years old but allergy :( but it’s one of my biggest wish which will never come true 76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t?Homework, learning 77: pink or yellow lemonade?Both 🤔78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?Definitely Fanclub 79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?Hugged me a long time , cared about me , wrote me a very long and cute birthday text me 80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?White and grey . I wanted something normal and I like the colours black , white and grey 81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.I don’t remember they’re eyes and eye colour😂82: are/were you good in school?Im good but not good Enough for me and my mom . My average is 1,8 but I wanna 1,5 or better 83: what’s some of your favorite album art?Idk 84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?I wanna a tattoo but Idk which one . Maybe something with rose(s)85: do you read comics? what are your faves?I don’t 86: do you like concept albums? which ones? Yes I do but idk which ones 87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?Idk. It depends on what kind of movies the person likes 88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?Idk Hahahaha89: are you close to your parents?I don’t know my father . I hate my stepfather and don’t talk to him but I’m also not close to my mom 90: talk about your one of you favorite cities.I love Moscow . It’s besutiful af and it’s big and it’s like full of live and not dead in the night and I just love it 91: where do you plan on traveling this year?Moscow92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?I drown my pasta into cheese . There’s never too much cheese 🤷🏻‍♂️93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?Idk how it’s called haha 94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday?I think the brother of a school friend 95: what are your plans for this weekend?My plans were sleeping as long as I want ,Netflix and homework because I have to get better grades 96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?Mostly I procrastinate on them a lot 97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?Intp, Lion , idk haha but Irving the one Harry Potter was in 98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?I don’t remember it and I don’t want to and I hate it . So please never talk about it again 99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.Leer-KC Rebell Hold on -chord overstreet Take on the world -you me at sixMAD world - Riverdale cast Many from little peep , kizaru, troye Sivan and russ

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?I think the future one . Like I wanna know how my future will be. Will I be still alive ? Will I be happy ? Will I reach some of my goals ? But on the other hand I also wanna be surprised but life etc.

BTW I needed nearly an hour to answer so questions but I think no one will read everything haha. But I you did , maybe you can message me 🤔

[flcwerstudies]

cute tag!

pretty long post coming up!! Thanks to @cafedetude for tagging me!! im tagging: @hermiionegrcnger​ @studying-frenzy​ @belledoe​ @tiny-notes​ @theteadesk​ !! You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to ofc and if u want to do it and i haven’t tagged you go ahead!! 

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? there must always be more milk than cereal, but that amount must not exceed a certain amount do you get me? when i scoop my cereal there has to be proportionate amounts of milk in each scoop, consistently, until i have finished my bowl. my mind is a strange and lonely place. 

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? yes! its so refreshing and i feel like all your lethargy just evaporates... i love taking walks in the winter around my neighborhood in the evenings.

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? spoons, lipsticks, i once used another book to bookmark a book, hair elastic, my contact lenses case, compact mirror....im a mess, i know 

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? tea: scalding hot with lots of sugar and some milk. coffee: lots of milk, so much sugar 

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? no? i just want my braces off!!

6: do you keep plants? yess

7: do you name your plants? yes! i am currently growing two wild roses and I’ve named them Calliope and Polymnia. 

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? journaling, writing, reenacting musicals and dramatic renditions of songs? 

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? yeah ofccc it keeps me sane 

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? back and side 

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? CAROL THE LESBIAN LIBRARIAN // mary walks by // too many to list here tbh 

12: what’s your favorite planet? mars! and also venus 

13: what’s something that made you smile today? my friends 

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? a hurricane flew thru the entire place, empty wine bottles on the ground, beanbag chairs, stacks of books and movies, maybe a cat and a dog lazing around on the couch 

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! there’s a gigantic cloud of alcohol wayyyyy out in outer space that could produce over 450 trillion pints of beer 

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? give me all the pasta. i love all pastas. 

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? im ok with my hair color now 

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. GETTING A CAPUCHIN MONKEY AS MY PATRONUS ON POTTERMORE

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? yes! i rant a lot and i sort of write down reflections? on my day and things. its really emo and angsty lmao im 16 pls 

20: what’s your favorite eye color? brown eyes. so gentle. so sharp. so kind but so cruel. so ambiguous! 

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. my tote bag from myanmar! the straps are falling off but i love it so much 

22: are you a morning person? depends on if i slept early enough 

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? sleep, watch a movie, watch youtube, read 

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? absolutely not. it always pisses me off when people are like ohhh you can tell me anything??? no i can’t???? 

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? my friend’s house lmao 

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? my peach converse! they’re so pastel and they seem weird but converse generally go well with a lot of things 

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? i don’t like gum tbh 

28: sunrise or sunset? both 

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? sticks his tongue out when he’s concentrating and its so cute i die everytime 

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? yes but i will never ever go into detail with anyone about this lmao 

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. i love socks, i like wearing weird socks except for toe socks, people who sleep with socks on are Immune to Heat and Not Afraid Of Dying?? no white socks get nasty real quick and they’re so bland, i love socks i have this grey pair with french bulldog faces allllll over it and i wear them all the time and even though people can’t see them i still get happy and tell people about my dog socks. 

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. HA LMAO we had just watched a scary movie so obviously we turned on my little pony and watched that for two hours 

33: what’s your fave pastry? cupcakes! anything tbh i have an enormous sweet tooth 

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? my dad used to go on a lot of business trips and he came back once with a huge stuffed bear from switzerland and its so fuzzy its still on my bed. it’s name is Fred and it wears overalls and it has brown fur! 

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? yes to all!!

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? paul anka lmao he’s not a band but ya know 

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? clean

38: tell us about your pet peeves! wHEN UR JAMMING OUT TO MUSIC AND THEN SPOTIFY JUST STOPS WORKING?? people asking me if im mad when im just being quiet and then making me mad by continually questionning me, people who will ask dumb questions (yes, there are always dumb questions. google is free and im not going to tell u the homework, it’s written on the board quite clearly u moron), racist/homophobic/ableist/ generally offensive and disrespectful people 

39: what color do you wear the most? grey and navy 

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? I have mismatching earrings that my grandmother got me for my birthday! 

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? Fifteen Dogs by Andre Alexis! 

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! the starbucks on center street it’s very Starbucks, exactly what you would expect, but I always sit in the corner spot near the windows 

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? My family! 

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? sitting in the sand in shell key, florida. my feet are in the water and i am watching my family swimming. I am very sunburnt but my mind is completely blank in a good way 

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? absolutely 

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. ofc they used a baby lion as their mascot. it’s simba-lic. 

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? there’s this food in korea that’s just stir fried rice with soybean sprouts and the sprouts..... aw god....they refuse to be bitten in half and it’s so gross i hate it sm 

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? darkness! and no it is different today!

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? there are scarce places to buy CD’s now but the last one I bought was Micheal Jackson’s Bad 

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? bottle caps and paperclips and also pens i pick off the ground 

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? my dad. any aretha franklin song 

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? the spongebob one and the gif of the white man who blinks a lot....u know the one 

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? i loved all of them and i want to be able to quote them in all of my speech but i dont think people have watched all of them 

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?  i was working on homework last night and when i was turning on my laptop to work on my project i met my reflection in the screen 

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? been incredibly bitchy like damn.....i surprise myself and i really hate it 

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? when people use weird shit as bookmarks, when they laugh with their eyes shut, laugh lines near their eyes, dimples, kindness, when they aren’t afraid of making eye contact with me bc i have weirdly intense eyes  

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? it did not fit the mood of my day but yes i did reenact the lyrics 

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? my friend diana is the wine mom but i am the vodka aunt. why?? she is infinitely more caring and kind and sophisticated and also wine gets u lowkey, calm drunk, while i, the vodka aunt, am caring, but i have a bit of a laissez faire attitude and go with the flow and ‘damn what the hell fuck it’ kinda vibe and vodka gets u sloppy shitfaced drunk with none of the sophistication that comes with wine. 

59: what’s your favorite myth? icarus

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? i dont LOVE poetry but i like haikus they’re like clever one liners ha 

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? I gave my friend a notebook that i’d hastily made the night before and I have received a box of pads which in retrospect is not even a stupid present bc pads are expensive 

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? i drink oj when i can 

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? i organize them every month bc i am ridiculous and i can’t function if my bookshelf is weirdly organized 

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? pale grey almost white.

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? my oldest group of friends (TNT lmaoooo) OR YOU KNOW callixtus from volunteering holyyy. you know those people who u meet and u immediately click with?? he’s on of them magical people and he was hella funny too i miss that guy to all hell 

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? small roses! peach blossoms and cherry blossoms too. one huge ass hibiscus or lotus flower as a statement piece 

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? cozy and sheltered. valid excuse for not going out 

68: what’s winter like where you live? terrible but i love it kinda 

69: what are your favorite board games? monopoly 

70: have you ever used a ouija board? NO WHAT 

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? barley, green or reallllyyyy black tea with loootss of sugar so that it makes your teeth ache 

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? yeah how’d you know 

73: what are some of your worst habits? expecting everyone to be on the same page 

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. dedicated and brash, loud and hilarious, soft, amazing, i love them a lot 

75: tell us about your pets! i dont have pets!! T-T  

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? studying BUT DONT CALL ME OUT LIKE THIS OK

77: pink or yellow lemonade? pink 

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? hateclub sorry 

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? done my makeup for me while gossiping with me

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? pale green and yeah i did. i chose it bc i love green! and the old color was boring and i didn’t like it  

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. no edges at all, soft bovine eyes , shaking leaves, crocodile tears 

82: are/were you good in school? yes! it’s a source of a lot of pride for me! 

83: what’s some of your favorite album art? amsterdam by nothing but thieves omg 

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? oohh nahh im not planning on getting tattoos im scared of needles 

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? through the woods? i used to read a lot of them but you know i grew out of them 

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? not especially no 

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? the drop, double indemnity, back to the future, idk there’s a lot 

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? the rennaissance! it was so extra and i loved it a lot 

89: are you close to your parents? yeah

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. TORONTO-soaring skyline from the highways at night near the lakeshore, the lights from the condos are like stars and its ridiculous but i also loooooveee dubrovnik in croatia and hanoi in vietnam and kaunas in lithuania and kyoto in japan.....in dubrovnik the wind blows in from the shore and at night when the lights are on in the walled city the stone glows amber. In Hanoi in the old quarter, motorbikes flash by and there’s yelling and the smell of pork skewers and there’s old buildings and new ones, huge stalks of bamboo leaning up against the walls. In Kaunas the wind is so cold and sharp and the buildings are so clean and there’s that old fortress and the tower! it’s so beautiful. and Kyoto is old and archaic but so modern it hurts and the streets are too uniform and the houses creep me out a bit bc they’re so quiet. 

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? i dont think so 

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? i will bury my pasta in cheese just you watch 

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? my hair is one style fits all bc its short 

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? my friend!

95: what are your plans for this weekend? study and work on projects and homework and stress and nap and have dinner with a guest 

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? no updates. we die like men. 

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? isfj-t, aries, ravenclaw 

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? sometime in september? it was nice! 

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. put your head on my shoulder by paul anka....there’s a lot and im really lazy sorry 

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 years in the future, just to see where I end up 

[zairehyun-blog]

do ask memes :o

ALL OF THEM!? ON THE ENTIRE WEBSITE!? no but since i love you i will ~

Halloween asks : done

‘Let’s get personal’: done

Sweet asks:

vanilla - how has your week been?

An honest to god mess, but that’s okay. It’ll get better soon~

chocolate - what do you crave right now?

Attention.

red velvet - what type of music do you like?

All tbh

ice cream - if you were an animal, what kind would you be?

I WOULD BE RILAKKUMA (u may be like zaire that’s not an animal. shhh let me be rilakkuma)

cake - describe your ideal location

like.. im just gonna say what i consider home

new zealand or osaka 💫

mocha - what are three things that make you feel warm inside?

my bby

the stars

writing abt my day at night

frosting - describe your appearance

uhm Mmmm i don’t know how i would.

marshmallow - do you sleep with plushies? if so, which are your favorites?

I DO INDEED i sleep with my moomin

sorbet - describe an ideal summer day

Going on adventures ;; especially car rides n stuff like that ✨

butterscotch - describe an ideal autumn day

going outside and walking around and the cold wind n i m happy it’s autumn 🍂

caramel - describe an ideal winter day

DRINKING HOT CHOCOLATE AND WATCHING TV IN AN OVERSIZED SWEATER WHILE IT SNOWS AND THEN GOING OUTSIDE TO PLAY IN THE SNOW ❄️

pecan - describe an ideal spring day

sitting outside n just enjoying all the flowers c”:

mint - what’s new in your life?

my bby

pie - “home is where…”

he is

macaroon - list three things you feel inspired to do

draw again

to cosplay

2 mAKE HOT CHOCOLATE NOW

Send me a number:

1: where are you from?

I was born in London but I was raised in New Zealand

2: how old are you?

I’m 18

3: when is your birthday?

March 13th

4: what is your favorite music genre?

It all depends on my mood

5: religious?

Yes

6: do you believe in ghosts?

Yes

7: would you want to be immortal?

Yes and no, I would hate to lose everyone who isn’t but I would love to see how the world will evolve idk

8: favorite book?

Alice in Wonderland

9: favorite song?

MIC DROP ASJGHSD

10: favorite band/singer?

I have too many but between bts and exo :3

11: sexual preference?

Indifferent to gender

12: virgin? If not, how old were you when you had sex for the first time?

No & 16

13: do you drink, if yes, tell me what?

Nah.

14: do you smoke?

No

15: ever did drugs?

No

16: ever visit a festival?

Yes

17: do you have pets? tell me about them!

I have 2 cats ✨

Ayumu & Kiyoshi

18: how many countries have you been to?

A lot , my dads travel 2 much

19: do you speak another language besides english? If yes, write a sentence in that language!

Korean - 안녕 사랑해!

Japanese - やあ、君を愛している！

and Arabic - مرحبا انا احبك!

They all say Hi, I love you! C:

20: vegan, vegetarian or meat eater?

21: be creative! write a short story about something that comes into your mind!

ASGIJSDHKJf i hate

one day we all heard zayn left the band and it was the worst day ever like they had a song called the best day ever no bitch this is the worst day ever and we all went 2 bed and it was all a mutual dream we all had (WTF WAS THIS ASKJGHKSD)

22: put your iPod on shuffle and tell me the first 10 songs

i don’t have my phone near me either

23: grab the nearest book and give me the last sentence of page 124

I have no books near me....

24: tell me about your crush

i’m answering his ask

25: any weird habits?

If i get scared i start sucking on the back of my thumb

26: ever been rude to a teacher?

Yeah

27: ever talked to yourself?

I always do...

28: extrovert or introvert?

In the middle

29: the most embarrassing moment in your life?

WHEN MY DAD GOT DRUNK AND STARTED FLIRTING wITH MY OTHER DAD AND WAS LIKE “u single”

and my other dad said “no.” and MY daD cRIEd AJHKGDS

30: what keeps you going?

🍯 you c: 🍯

31: ever thought about suicide?

Always

32: do you suffer from a mental illness?

Yeah

33: I'm bored, tell me something funny that happened to you!

I once fell down a flight of stairs because I thought someone was walking up them and I wanted to beat them, but like as I was falling I realised I was walking downstairs and no one was there.

34: your 5 favorite blogs

1. @spook-hyun

2. @lucidyeol

3. @hosvoks

4. @ultchen

5. any suggestion blog tbqh

35: 10 facts about yourself

1. I can bend my pinky all the way back lmao

2. It took me one night to learn Korean :’)

3. I’m a self taught artist

4. the first cat I ever had, I randomly found and I nursed him back to health and he never left me C:

5. I used to want to be a vet/or just someone around animals at all times

6. I used to live by the ocean and yet i’m lowkey afraid of it askJGHKSD

7. I started this blog as a safe space ✨

8. I have a twin sister who’s older than me by a minute

9. I have a younger sister who still calls me her little brother....

10. i’m madly in love

36: 3 things you like about yourself

Nothing

37: 3 things you hate about yourself

Everything

38: biggest turn on?

AHEH IM NOT DISCLOSING THAT I have a stalker who’s gonna try shit so no

29: biggest turn off?

someone who’s controlling. ;e; like i get if you’re like warning me abt something but if you’re like thisthen yeah fuck off.

30: when did you join tumblr?

January 2014

Luxury Asks:

bubble bath: do you have any routines before bedtime? like skin care, etc. what are they?

AHA YALL READY FOR THIS

I wash my face n then i brush my teeth and then i put lotion on and i change and then i drink green tea and watch anime lmao and that’s it

champagne: what topic could you talk about for hours?

You

crushed velvet: have you ever used your charm to get something you want?

AHEH HOW DO U THINK I GOT HYUN

diamonds: how do you feel about excessively spending money?

I mean, if it’s for a shopping spree for good reason (like u got cheated on and are trying to make yourself happy) then yeah, but if you do it everyday then no

faux fur: describe your wardrobe.

lots of oversized sweaters and jeans and cosplay outfits

glitter: describe someone special to you.

His eyes look like honey when the sun shines on them and every time it happens I fall in love

gold: describe what you would call the most perfect meal.

mY DADS KIMCHI COME FOR ME

jazz: name a song that resonates with you and your emotions. explain the reason why.

Go go because 

“I want to be cruisin’ on the bayI want to be cruisin’ like NemoNo money but I wanna go far awayI don’t have money but I wanna relaxNo money but I wanna eat Jiro Ono’s sushi

Worked hard to get my payGonna spend it all on my stomachPinching pennies to spend it all on wasting itLeave me be, even if I overspendEven if I break apart my savings tomorrowLike a crazy guy”

lace: what is something in your life completely different from last year?

My happiness

lingerie: do you consider yourself a promiscuous person?

If I remember the definition correctly 

kinda? but I stopped being that way

lipstick: do you enjoy talking to strangers?

n...no not at all lmAO unless it’s like at a comic con or something like that then yeah

pearls: what's something about your personality that surprises others?

I open up to people when I feel comfortable with them, like, I seem really shy and reserved but I open up to everyone I meet as long as I’m comfortable. 

penthouse: what would you consider your dream home? describe it.

AAAH my old house

perfume: if you could make your own signature fragrance, what would it smell like?

Ironically my cologne is really strong but it’s not so strong you’re like *dies inside*, it’s like, it’s strong so you remember it and if you smell it somewhere, you’re like “Zaire?”

robe: how do you prepare for an evening alone with a loved one/date?

I HYPE MYSELF UP AND THEN I GET READY LMAO

roses: If it had to be winter, autumn, spring or summer for the rest of your life, which would you choose?

AUTUMN AUTUMN AUTUMN LIKE 

AUTUMN ABT TO TURN WINTER YES

satin: what is your most favorite article of clothing?

this oversized as FUcK black sweater that says “fuck off” in japanese on the sleeves asghsdjkfl 

sheet mask: what's your favorite lazy activity?

drinking tea while watching anime

silk: do you have more inner or outer beauty?

Inner

silver: do you have any obscure hobbies? what are they?

I’ll draw on the wall and then i’ll paint over it??? unless i rlly rlly like it

sparkling water: what are your top three songs for the summer?

ew summer

wine: what kind of drunk are you (happy/affectionate, angry, sad, fun/wild)? if you don't drink, what kind do you think you WOULD be?

Well, 

one dad acts all normal and like he’s not drunk and he makes perfect sense and he’s fully aware of everything and can walk perfectly and cook

my biological dad on the other hand is all emotional and affectionate n happy n soft lMAO so i guess i’d be like my biological dad

wow bby i hope you enjoyed this

[rosenmarille]

rosenmarille’s embroidery tutorial

hey anon you made my entire week and i love you

Let me preface this by saying that I’m in no way an expert and I’ve literally only been doing this for less than a month, so most of what I do is making it up as I go along. hopefully you find my tips helpful though!! <3

I wasnt sure which part you wanted to know about so i made a rundown of everything from start to end

1) List of things you’ll need:

Embroidery frame (I just went to the nearest crafts store and got them in two sizes. Theyre quite cheap and sometimes also come in plastic or different shapes)

Fabric (the less stretchy the better, though if youre planning to decorate clothing I think it really depends on how determined you are. what ive got here is some leftover polyester fabric from cosplay and other sewing projects. you can even sew different pieces together if one isnt big enough for the frame but in that case you need to iron the sewed piece flat or else it will be very difficult to keep straight and neat)

Embroidery yarn (see pic) (theres two types, and ive only used pearl yarn (top) so far but the other one allows for more precision since you can pick how many strands of yarn you need)

Needle (see pic) (properly pointy, not like the crappy one above. I mainly use that for crochet things because it actually bends and that’s NOT what you want here)

Scissors and a pencil

2) Sketch: Pick an image of what you want to do. I’ve found that at first, practicing with basic shapes and colours is a lot easier to get used to the whole thing, it helps give you a feel of how the yarn ends up looking stitched to the fabric. So far I almost only did screenshots, and I didn’t have to draw something up myself. In mobs case, I based it off a doodle I did in class and added a little colour to it 

3) Pick fabric and yarn: That’s mainly up to you, depends on what youre going for, but as a fair warning, very light fabric colours will show the stitches and leftover yarn from behind, so you need to tuck them behind the main body of your embroidery later on

4) Apply to fabric: 2 ways, both pretty much self explanatory, only heres where the stretchiness of the fabric comes into play. As you can see ive developed a fool proof technique, ive had tape stuck to the top of my laptop for weeks now, im not about to waste it? (use more than one tape, this is an old pic i took because the concept was hilarious in the moment) Pro tip: don’t draw your sketch on paper advertising dnd game sets because youre gonna have a hard time seeing the pattern through everything and youll curse yourself for doing that instead of paying attention in class  Pro tip 2: dark fabrics demand a white colour pencil, you literally wont be able to see anything else

5) Stitches: heres a LINK to the page I use to find all the different stitches I could possibly use. Practice makes perfect, i spent about two hours trying each of these out on an irrelevant piece of fabric to see how theyd work and how difficult they are, and still use that bit as ref to consider how a stitch would look on my current piece. Of these, ive only used about three in my finished broids, since theyre mostly for decorative things I think. Don’t let that stop you though, get creative and use the things im too lazy to incorporate!! (ill be using these terms for the rest of the tutorial, so if you dont know a word its probably in there)

6) Outlines/shading: Start by outlining your sketch with a few backstitches to get a feel for where everything needs to be. If theres shading then itd be useful to do those lines in the other colour already, or youre going to have to fix all that later and itll be a huge pain and make you want to stop altogether. It happens

Im not sure if that’s how its supposed to work but I fill in the shades first, it gives me a good sense of what direction the main colour stitches need to go to make it look dynamic.

7) Fill in mains: This is where all those handy dandy stitches from that library probably wont help you too much if you want to do something relatively simple. Ive only used normal satin stitches to fill in colour so far, though what the link doesn’t mention is that it wastes a shitton of yarn. Yarn is expensive, so what you can do is come up for point 3 not back next to 1 but instead next to 2. Warning: that does warp the way the yarn lies though, so use that one accordingly (for example: I do Not use it when doing small delicate places, or things that need to be detailed in general)

Mob was fairly simple as far as that went since i didnt add a lot of pattern, but ritsu is a little more complicated. Like i said earlier, adding shade before the main colour helps because now i know where the folds in his clothes are and how the fabric would bend to accommodate it.

8) Add details (like faces!):

Again, here I cant tell you exactly how you need to stitch to get everything looking good, just try to follow the way a face has its dynamics. Is it a long face, make lots of long vertical stitches, is it a round one, try to stick to the edges (but don’t spiral)

Facial features are a little more difficult because its hard to make a round nub or dots for pupils on something very small but its better to try 5 times and get it right the 6th instead of leaving the 1st try (i took ritsus entire face apart at least 3 times and t b q h i still think it doesnt look good but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

9) Background: Get real fancy on that shit, heres where you can try out those cool rose shaped stitches from up there in the link, go wild lol

10) Lastly: PATIENCE

I cant stress this enough, this WILL take a loooot of time, the first ritsu I did took me a literal week, while the second one took me roughly four hours in total (and that was a rather simple design). 

Accept the fact that it wont look as good as you imagined it. That may sound harsh but for me that’s been my main issue, imagining how a string would lie exactly and then looking on in disgust when that doesn’t work out. You’re not drawing, the medium doesn’t exactly translate, but that doesn’t have to be a bad thing! Try to figure out what methods work best for embroidery exclusively. 

Don’t be afraid to undo, be careful about it though. I use those big scissors and it’s a bad idea, don’t do that. Unpicking from the back to save the yarn also works but it gets difficult (and at some point impossible) once the strands start getting woven together on their own

And there you have it, a finished piece of embroidery!! 

You can now either hang it up in its frame and cut away the excess fabric at the sides or tie it around a piece of cardboard like so. it’s a little hard to get right at first but practice amiright

I hope i could be of help!! if you have any more questions feel free to come to my ask anytime!! ^^ <33