#i would have liked to run into her at the fish pond
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goodlucktai · 1 day ago
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till you can breathe on your own
rise of the tmnt word count: 20k i wrote this fic for the turtle trenches server’s november gift exchange ! my giftee was @acewithapaintbrush and ace’s prompts were “found family, leosagi, wholesome disaster twins, and splinter being a good dad to the boys.” instead of being normal and picking one i decided to create an au that included all of those things at once and this is what i came up with. ace i really hope you enjoy it <3 happy turtle day ! title borrowed from keeping your head up by birdy
read on ao3
x
When Leonardo was eight years old, he and his best friend survived a house fire.
The blaze was put out thanks to a passing yokai with a magic spell for rain newly purchased that she was happy to use to help, but two of the children attending lessons there came up unaccounted for. Panicked neighbors searched for upwards of an hour only to find the boys fast asleep in a cart of clean linens parked out front of the bath house. 
There was a faint trace of mystic energy lingering around them but no one came forward as the one it belonged to, and they wouldn’t be able to explain what had happened. One minute they were trapped and frightened, and the next everything was blue and they were safe. 
Ultimately the rescue was credited to a powerful good samaritan who wished to remain anonymous, and the townsfolk collectively decided to be grateful for the miracle without unraveling it any further.
Leonardo’s friend moved away while his house was repaired, and Leonardo was returned to where he belonged at the local orphanage. He smiled when the matron fussed over him, even though he didn’t feel like smiling, and continued to pretend like he didn’t hear the other kids calling him bad luck.  
“You’d think someone would want him,” one of the older kids whispered during lunch. “Last time we had a turtle here they got snatched up in like a week.”
“Miss Toto says that way of thinking is archaic,” a tiny otter yokai piped up with remarkable authority, given that he clearly didn’t know the meaning of the word he was repeating. “Kameko has as much of a chance as the rest of us do.”
“Clearly,” the older kid muttered. 
Leonardo, who wasn’t Leonardo yet—who was called Kameko by the orphanage matron because she wasn’t especially creative, and Lucky by the other kids so they could be mean in a sneaky, underhanded way, and Stripes by his best friend, who mattered more than any of them—spent a lot of time dreaming of having a chance. 
He had no way of knowing that at the same time, miles away and a city above, an early-middle-aged man run ragged day in and out by three energetic children and sloughing through a persistent sadness was dreaming, too. 
The man was dreaming of his own childhood; a garden with a pond and lines of laundry drying in the late summer sun, a delicious smell sneaking out the kitchen window where jiji was grilling fish for dinner, his mother lifting her head to grace him with a smile he once took for granted. 
In the dream, she had to reach up to hold his face, because he was the same age now as she was when she died and several inches taller than her in adulthood. She didn’t mind his fur or snout or big rounded ears, and if anything the involuntary twitch of his whiskers only made her smile deepen. 
“My sweet boy,” she murmured, “I’m so proud of you.”
“How?” he choked out. He clung to her arms. He had a thousand things he wanted to tell her. All that came tripping out was, “How can you be?”
“Because I know how big your heart is,” she said, her tone leaving no room for argument. “You love so richly and earnestly. Even after that was taken advantage of and betrayed, you found more room in your heart for your little ones. Your little turtles.”
The thought of his sons pierced through the gloom of self-hatred like an arrow of light, as simple as flipping a switch in a dark room. He wouldn’t trade a moment with them for anything—not even for another moment with his mother. The overwhelming grief and love coexisted as naturally as two little otters holding hands at sea.
“But don’t you know?” she asked. “Can’t you feel it? Did it get lost in that big heart of yours? One of your children is waiting for you.”
He jerked as if electrocuted, going stiff and still beneath his mother’s hands, because she couldn’t mean to say what it sounded like she was saying. 
That tiny fourth turtle with the blue-patterned shell and bright gold eyes—the first one to smile and reach up to be held, the one that had fallen during their frantic escape and was left behind in the crush of the destroyed lab—the one the little shrine in his room belonged to, even though he didn’t have a proper photo, or a decent idea of what Blue would have looked like grown into personhood—the one that a corner of his heart belonged to, even now, even still—
“He’s alive, my darling,” his mother told him. In the dream, she sounded so certain. The clan symbol on her obi seemed to glow, a warm, shining thing that cast all darkness and doubt aside. “Go and bring my grandbaby home, okay?”
Hamato Yoshi woke up with a gasp, half-blinded by tears. 
——
The boys took the news as well as they possibly could have. It would have felt wrong not to tell them—cruel to keep them in the dark, even if it would shelter them from a hope that might only lead into a dead-end. 
They already knew of their fourth sibling, having long-since discovered the little shrine in Splinter’s room during a pre-Christmas snooping several years ago, but there hadn’t been much that Splinter could offer them when they peppered him for information and eventually those eager questions tapered off. They had only had a few months together in Draxum’s lab before Splinter could stage their escape and bring the facility down behind them—before tragedy had carved a hole into their brand-new family—and that wasn’t long enough to have more than a handful of stories to share. To do the baby’s memory anything resembling justice. 
But since waking up from that dream, Splinter had reached out with his ninpo in the way he hadn’t done since he was very young, like stretching out an atrophied limb, and he felt it. A fourth presence in his heart. It was a very faint echo somewhere far away, like an imprint of smoke left in the sky after a firework. Distant now and fading, but once-bright. Once-blue. 
And he knew. He knew Leonardo was alive.
“Red, you are in charge,” Splinter said, jittery with anticipation. He spared a moment to cup the snapper’s cheek in his palm, brushing his thumb over the rosy-colored diamond pattern there, and added, “Aunt June’s phone number is on the fridge if anything happens—but nothing had better happen! April can visit but you are not allowed to leave our home until I return.”
Red nodded several times, twisting his fingers together. He had inherited Splinter’s anxious heart, but he took being the oldest very seriously, and failure more seriously than that, for all that he was only nine. 
“Are you going to get Leo?” Orange piped up, bouncing in place. He had, in fact, not stopped bouncing since he had gleaned the gist of the conversation that began nearly a full hour ago. “Are you going to bring him home?”
“I am going to try,” Splinter said, kneeling so that he could poke his youngest baby playfully in those ticklish spots on his sides that always elicited a sunny giggle. 
Orange trilled in glee, and then he pulled his limbs and head into his tiny shell the way he often did when he was overexcited or overwhelmed and continued making turtle noises to himself from inside there. 
Splinter caught the talkative box shell before it could clatter to the floor and offered it to Red, who held it to his front the way he hugged his stuffies. 
“Okay my sweet boys,” Splinter said, “stay here and be good and I will see you in a short while.”
Purple trailed him to the front door, or what served as such in their repurposed underground home. After tugging on his coat and boots, Splinter turned to him and crouched down so they were at something approaching eye-level, even if eye contact did not seem to be on the table this morning. 
“You said we hatched at the same time,” Purple surprised the hell out of him by saying. His recalcitrant softshell son very rarely spoke aloud unless asked a direct question, and here he was volunteering whole sentences without preamble. “You said he came out of his egg right after me. He had stripes, and eyes like mine. You called us twins.”
Leonardo was not a forbidden topic in their home, but he was a bit of a sore one. It ached to press on the bruise that was their missing part. Purple in particular had a difficult time making himself understood and being understood in turn. He was also incredibly stubborn, and hard to match wits with. 
A twin must have sounded like a dream. Splinter wondered when Donatello had first shaped this little wish out of clay, and how often he spent taking it out and admiring it, wearing the rough edges into smoothness, giving it substance and character until all that was missing was the life. The color. 
“He was not the same species of turtle as you,” Splinter said. “But you did hatch together, and you did have the same eyes. Blue would fuss at bedtime until I placed him on your shell. You tried to take chunks out of the alchemist’s fingers whenever he parted the two of you.” For tests, he didn’t feel it was necessary to add. He offered his hands, and added, “So that is what I called you. My twin babies.” 
After a moment, Purple took his hands. His mouth was a firm line, golden eyes glued to the floor. There was enough of a wet shine in them that Splinter’s heart strained with the need to right every wrong for him at once. 
“I will find him, Donatello,” Splinter said. “Now that I know he is out there waiting to be found, there is nothing that can stop me. It might take a long time, but we have waited quite a while already, haven’t we?”
Purple nodded, and then stepped forward to bury his snout in the front of Splinter’s coat. It meant that a hug would be not only tolerated but appreciated, and Splinter didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around his little boy. 
“Go on now,” Splinter said, only when Purple had extracted himself. He turned the child around by the shoulders and propelled him back to where Orange and Red were waiting. “I love you, little monsters,” he called loud enough to be heard by all three of them. “If the lair is still standing when I get home, you will get ice cream.”
Their noisy cheers followed him down the tunnel, warming him more effectively than direct sunlight ever could.  
And now Splinter was back in the Hidden City, although he had sworn to himself he would never return. 
His heart was racing, every nerve a livewire, so prepared he was for danger around each corner. He had hoped that the mad alchemist died in the destruction of the lab—had comforted himself with the fact, even, on those nights he woke up from bad dreams—but with Blue’s miraculous survival, Draxum might very well have lived too. Like a cockroach. 
And so he was hesitant to trace his steps back to the ruins of Draxum’s lab. He was not even sure if he would be able to find it. There was a restless, dislocated thing inside of him that made standing still a painful exercise, he so badly wanted to run and run until he found the little turtle he was looking for—he just didn’t know where to go. Where to start. The Hidden City was larger than he remembered.
“Excuse me,” someone said, startling him. He turned to find a short beetle yokai in a rumpled button down shirt and slacks standing just behind him, mandibles clicking idly. The beetle smiled and said, “I’m sorry, I couldn’t help but notice you seemed lost. Can I help in any way?”
It was Splinter’s first instinct to deny the apparent kindness. Lena—or Big Mama as she was called—had carved out the remains of his idealism as deftly as a gardener pulling up the last stubborn weed in a flower bed. People, he had been taught, were rarely kind for no reason. 
But April’s mother was a force of nature in her own right, and had bullied Splinter into friendship with her within a week of their children meeting. A New Yorker to her core, June O’Neil had only needed a moment to adjust to the sight of a mutant rat and three mutant turtles, at which point any lingering strangeness was overshadowed by the relief of finally having another single parent to commiserate with. She was on-call for every scare, every tantrum that left Splinter feeling out of his depth, every milestone. She refused to allow him to wallow in self-pity while he had three little boys to raise. 
June was the sole reason that there were a few shoots of hope growing in the ruin Lena left of him, stubborn and resilient and flowering. People were rarely kind for no reason, but rarely did not mean never. There was goodness to be found if one took the time to look for it. The risk did not always pay off, but the reward when it did was worthwhile every time. 
And so Splinter took his heart in his hands and faced the stranger and said, “Yes, please. If you’re able. I need help.”
The beetle yokai, a friendly, down-to-earth character named Cricket, listened to the bare bones of Splinter’s story and immediately began to guide him down the street. It was a street that would not have looked out of place in Osaka in the 80s. There were storefronts with neon signs and restaurants with enticing noren doors and the steady foot traffic of thousands of yokai milling about their day. No one paid a tall rat mutant any mind. 
“You’ll want the Chamber of Decisions,” Cricket said with a certainty that settled one small inch of the chaos in Splinter’s heart. “There will be someone there who can help you find your son.”
The beetle yokai took time enough out of his own day to show Splinter all the way through a startlingly mundane municipal building to a floor with a placard on the wall declaring it the Civil Courts. He even waited in line with Splinter, making pleasant conversation, until it was his turn to step forward and address the employee behind the front desk.
“Goodbye,” Cricket said at that point, stepping away. “And good luck!”
He was gone before Splinter could thank him, and the gazelle yokai behind the desk repeated, “Next,” in a tone that suggested she would be deeply unhappy to say it a third time. 
“Yes,” Splinter said quickly, “sorry, that’s me.”
“What is your name?” the yokai asked briskly. She had long spiraling horns and a long, narrow face, deceptively delicate. She wore a badge on a lanyard around her neck that read Helena, Court Clerk, and then a mess of characters beneath it that did not look like English or Japanese. 
“Hamato Yoshi,” Splinter replied by rote. When he spoke, a small crystal hovering unobtrusively above the desk glowed a clear spring green. It seemed to indicate his truthfulness, because the yokai didn’t request any further proof of identity. 
“Hamato?” the yokai, presumably Helena, said with a spark of interest. She read something from the text that populated on the holographic tablet in front of her and then added, “We have a backlog of forms here for you. It has been a long time since someone has claimed tenancy of your clan’s branch house in Neo Edo. I assume that’s why you’re here?”
“Uh,” Splinter said intelligently, “no. What?”
“The Hamato Estate,” Helena said. She seemed less than impressed with him. “The one that has been sitting in disrepair and bringing property values of the neighborhood down for more than a century. That has nothing to do with your visit today?” 
The Chamber of Decisions was very human in structure, and the bureaucracy was completely disarming. Splinter didn’t know what he showed up expecting to find here but he sort of felt as though he was walking through a lucid dream.
“Sorry, no, I—I was unaware my family had any dealings in the Hidden Cities at all. I was raised in Japan. In—a human city in Japan. And now my children and I live in New York.” 
Helena’s expression cleared with understanding, her attitude suddenly more helpful as she seemed to realize Splinter was not being willfully obtuse. She opened a drawer of the filing cabinet beside her desk and rifled through it until she came up with form after form that accumulated in an intimidating heap. 
Splinter bit the inside of his mouth so that he wouldn’t say something unfortunate. He was catching up to himself, the surprise and uncertainty of the situation he had found himself in fading into the background, his single-minded focus sharpening into a point once again. 
Blue had waited long enough to be found. It was deeply unfair to make him wait even a moment more. And unfair to Splinter, too, who just wanted to be given a direction that he could run in until he could scoop his son up and never let him go again. 
“Excuse me,” Splinter said, wrestling with himself until a semblance of good manners won its cage match with snarling impatience, “but I am here because I was told you might help me locate a missing child.” 
The gazelle’s head jerked up, hooved hands stilling. “What missing child?”
For the second time that day, Splinter explained his situation to a stranger. Not the whole thing; not the nature of his or his sons’ mutations, or the desperate life-or-death struggle that preceded their flight from the destroyed lab into the nearby city—this city—and then ultimately New York. But the gist of it. The fire, and the baby who fell from his arms, and the long years he has spent mourning a son he thought had died. That much he imparted as succinctly as he knew how. 
Helena punctuated his story with clipped nods, listening intently. She sifted through the stacked bundles of paperwork and withdrew two or three that she placed on the top of the pile. 
“We will register you and your children as citizens of the Hidden Cities,” she said firmly when Splinter had finished detailing the dream that led him to believe his son was alive. “Your clan has already been established here for centuries, so this will not take long. As a citizen you will have the full weight and reach of this court’s resources behind you. We will locate your son.” 
If there had been a chair behind him, Splinter would have collapsed into it. As it is, he only swayed on his feet for a moment, before mustering a hoarse, “Thank you.”
After the dream of his mother, Splinter had been feeling acutely guilty of the way he had left his family name well behind him, crafting a new identity for a new life in America. Now he was only grateful that Lena and that lunatic Draxum would not think twice about a rat mutant named Hamato Yoshi, or his children.
It felt surreal to write down their names—Raphael, Michelangelo, Donatello, Leonardo. For so long, they had been only his precious joys. The human world was not one he could trust to appreciate them. The O’Neils were a shining exception, one in a million. So his little family was kept a well-guarded secret. 
And now here he was, signing an official document that gave his turtles another place to belong, a place that could not be taken away by a mad alchemist or scheming spider. 
“If you come with me, I can take you to the appropriate department,” Helena said, cordial and efficient as she placed the last of the paperwork in a folder that glowed a friendly green before disappearing into fragments of light that spelled out ‘FILED.’ “It’s lucky you came when you did. We have a witch on retainer, and we would have called her in for this, but she’s already working from the office today.”
“Right,” Splinter said, smoothing down his shirt with nervous fingers. 
He didn’t know what his expression was doing, but it seemed to give the gazelle yokai a sense of urgency. She hustled him down a couple of halls and through more than one doorway that seemed to lead to another building entirely, until he was hopelessly lost somewhere in the depths of the administration.
But the office he finally stepped into was one that wouldn’t have looked place in any of the high rise buildings in FiDi, with an executive desk of solid wood, a neat row of filing cabinets, a less neat wall of overflowing shelves, and sparse, impersonal decor. There were a few oddities—self-watering hanging plants suspended in front of the window, and a glowing crystal levitating above the desk where a computer might have sat otherwise—but nothing that made Splinter’s animal hindbrain balk at the door. 
The young woman sitting behind the desk looked up and smiled, round brown face dimpled and kind. Half of her voluminous braided hair was piled on top of her head in a neat bun, while the rest framed her shoulders in interchanging plaits of black and mint green. Her long, pointed ears were pierced a dozen times each and dripping in tiny precious gemstones. 
“Hello there, Helena and friend,” she greeted. “Can I help you?”
“Nimue, this is Hamato-san. He recently had a prophetic dream that a child he lost in infancy is, in fact, alive,” Helena replied promptly. “We’ll need a spell for finding.”
It sounded actually insane when put so plainly, but she spoke in a way that reminded Splinter of his former account manager, no-nonsense and judicious. The young lady behind the desk took them both seriously and stood, brushing her braids back over her shoulder.
“I’ll start at once,” Nimue said. “It’ll only take a few minutes.” 
“Summon me if you need anything else,” Helena said briskly. “I’ll be finalizing the documentation up front.” 
Both yokai and witch were very perfunctory about the whole thing, as if it was business as usual. It went a long way in disarming that last kernel of doubt that Splinter had harbored every step of the way here.
With the doubt uprooted, there was space at last for painful, smothered hope to burst into full and violent bloom. 
He was shuffled into the adjoining room and into a squashy loveseat. This area seemed much more like a witch’s workshop; there were tricky, delicate glass instruments whirring away under their own power at a carved wooden table in the corner, and stacks of heavy leather volumes on all the shelves and flat surfaces, interspersed with jars of things like feathers and stones and shiny beetle shells. Dried herbs and flowers dangled in neat bundles from a rack on the ceiling, where motes of something too colorful to be dust floated in wandering circles. There was a small furry animal curled up to sleep on the arm rest of the chair opposite Splinter’s, light brown with a darker brown band across its eyes. When it lifted its head at the sound of the door closing, Splinter realized it was a ferret. 
“Please excuse the mess,” Nimue said, “I’m really not here that often so I tend not to prioritize organization. I know it’s a sad excuse.”
“I’m a single father parenting thr—four boys,” Splinter replied, heart skipping a beat at the self-correction. He would be parenting four. “The last thing I am qualified to judge anyone on is tidiness.” 
Nimue laughed. “I’ll take it! Now, I told Helena this would only be a moment, and I meant every word. There are lots of disclaimers and policies I could bog you down with, and probably ought to, but I know they’ll just go in one ear and out the other. You’re here to find your son, and that’s what I’m going to help you do.”
“Yes,” Splinter breathed. “Please.”
“Of course! A spell for finding is one of my favorites, not in the least because it’s super simple.” 
Nimue sat across from him, lifted the ferret off the arm of her chair and into her lap, and then held out both her hands. Splinter took them without second-guessing it. 
“Magic draws so much from nature,” the witch went on. As she spoke, various pieces of glass or crystal in the room began to glow, as if her voice contained a brilliance that could be caught and reflected back. “In our spells, we use plants, stones, animal shed—things given by the earth—and sometimes energy generated by a storm or the sea. A friend that I graduated university with channels power from lightning. Very flashy, but very hard to pin down.”
A pool of light formed between them, beneath their joined hands. It was flat and still, like the surface of calm water. Four little jewels in bright candy colors shone through—red, orange and purple clustered together, and blue clear on the other end. Splinter’s heart ached; he knew them. He knew them. 
“At its core, it’s orderly,” Nimue said, her voice calm and smiling. “The most powerful rituals I know of are tied to star charts or phases of the moon, because even celestial bodies follow a pattern. Magic wants to make right. It wants to return things. And so a spell like this costs absolutely nothing. A lost child belongs with their family; that’s as fundamental a thing as gravity.”
She let go of Splinter’s hands and turned her own to catch the pool of light in the cup of her palms. She closed her hands together, as if compressing something as tight as possible between them, and then with a sudden jerking motion, flung them up and open. 
The light spread between them in a translucent, shimmering curtain. It looked like a chart, or a map, though not one Splinter had any hope of reading.  
Nimue hummed in what could either be surprise or delight, her smile showing teeth. 
“Oh, look at how clear and bright they are,” she cooed, “shining like stars. You must be so proud. And here’s little boy blue,” she added, pointing out the lonely light living by itself, isolated from the others. “He’s in Sawara Town, not too far from here.” 
Splinter’s heart was a frantic drum inside his chest. He wasn’t sure if he’d taken a single full, deep breath since he woke up from that dream that brought him to this moment in the first place. He twitched with the urge to scoop those colorful, twinkling little lights out of the rest and hold them close, hold them safe. 
“So what now?” he managed to choke out. “Are you going to teleport me there or something?”
Nimue laughed again, scritching the ferret’s ruff with the tips of her fingers. 
“Teleport? I’m good but I’m not that good! I’ll call you a cab.”
Not even two full hours later, Splinter was walking up the main street of Sawara. It was a bustling rural town with a mighty canal for a heart, filled with wooden fishing boats and framed by thin wisps of willow trees. Machiya-style houses rambled along in tight rows on either side of the waterway, most of them with front doors and shutters slid open to display shop spaces. 
Splinter stopped at a dry goods store to ask for directions to the orphanage, and the storeowner pointed him toward the sprawling estate at the edge of town, tucked into the natural bend of the river. 
He was floating in that dream feeling again. Everything was two inches left of reality. He was half-prepared to discover that this day felt impossible because it was impossible and he should have known better than to believe it could be this easy. He was half-prepared for someone to yank the curtain back and reveal the wizard was just some guy running a long con the whole time. Splinter had always, always been the punchline of a bad joke. 
But he promised the boys he would find their brother. He thought of Purple’s eyes, wide with hope, and his quiet voice saying, “You called us twins.” He thought of that sweet baby he had only briefly been anything like a father to, the first of the four to smile at him, the first one to want to be held by him. 
Resolve filled every chamber of his heart until it overflowed from there and filled the rest of him for good measure. That floating, dreaming feeling scattered into painful cognizance. 
He was Lou Jitsu. He was Hamato Atsuko’s only son. If life had taught him anything, it was how to take a punch. He would follow this road to wherever it led, and if Blue was not at the end of it, then he would find another road to follow. He would walk forever if he had to. He would let his heart get broken a hundred thousand times. 
Splinter let himself through the gate and strode up the meandering path toward the front of the house. He wondered if he ought to announce himself, and then discovered a doorbell half-hidden beneath the leaves of a drooping hanging plant. He rang it, and squared his shoulders, and waited. 
After about a minute, the door slid open to reveal a harried-looking pangolin yokai with a squirming raccoon child in her arms. It was a scene immediately familiar to Splinter as a pre-naptime battle of wills. 
“Oh, hello,” the pangolin said, offering a smile as she managed not to drop the uncooperative toddler with a deftness that spoke of years of experience. “My name is Tomomi, I’m the matron here. How can I help you?”
“Hello,” Splinter replied, returning her bow automatically. He realized suddenly that he probably should have been practicing what he would say in this moment, because he was coming up blank. “Ah, my name is Hamato Yoshi, and I’m—I’m, uh—I’m here for my kid.” 
Nailed it. 
“You may need to be slightly more specific than that,” the matron said, bemused. 
“Right,” Splinter said. Specifics. He could do specifics. “I had a dream. And then there was a whole thing with a witch and a finding spell. Uh, I have documentation? That the court clerk sent with me?” 
Tomomi maneuvered the child into one arm and reached for the papers Splinter offered with her freed hand, all of them stamped with Helena’s imposing seal. As she read, her eyebrows made a shocked jump toward her scaly hairline. 
Splinter’s heart fluttered madly. His chest felt like a cage full of restless birds. 
“My son was lost to me when he was a baby, and I believed that he was dead. Something happened recently that—that revealed him to me. It showed me that he was still alive. If he’s here, I—I want him. I have always wanted him. He has three brothers who have been missing him, too. He has never,” Splinter faltered, and had to swallow twice before he could go on, “he has never been unwanted, not even for a single day.”
“Oh, my spirits,” Tomomi murmured, crouching to let the little raccoon yokai slide free and then dart victoriously away. She straightened again, a hand pressed flat to her chest as she passed the papers back, perfectly stunned. “If he’s here, and he’s yours, I’ll help you however I can. What can you tell me about him?”
Splinter said, “He’s—he’s a little turtle. Eight years old. His shell is—just, one moment.” 
With shaking hands, he crammed the documents into his jacket pocket and withdrew his phone instead. His pictures weren’t sorted into albums, because 99.99% of them were all pictures of his children or April, rendering any attempt to sort them entirely redundant. That did mean he had to swipe for a moment before he found a decent photo of Orange’s carapace, and the warm yellow pattern of his scutes. 
“His shell pattern would be very similar to his brother’s, you see? And his eyes were this color,” Splinter went on, swiping to a picture of Purple glaring resolutely away from the camera, golden eyes distinctive even when narrowed and averted behind thick prescription glasses. “He was—he was very sweet. Very talkative. He wanted to be held all hours of the day. He—”
“He’s here, Hamato-san,” Tomomi blurted, eyes huge. 
“He’s… oh.” Splinter stared back at her, phone still extended dumbly in his hand. He felt frozen in place. A gust of wind would probably have been enough to knock him clear over. “He’s here?”
The matron seemed to be in disbelief herself, staring at Splinter as though he was a figment of her imagination and if she moved too suddenly he might disappear. 
“I can’t believe it. After all this time.” Then she shook her head, and wrapped professionalism back around her shoulders like a trusty cloak. She said, “Please come with me to my office, I’ll have Kameko brought to us there.” 
Kameko. Turtle child. Splinter didn’t know how he felt about that name, but kept it to himself. He was minutes—minutes— away now. If he absolutely had to go crashing through every single wall in this building one by one to find his child, that was entirely within his power. He would save that as the nuclear option, but not remove it from the table entirely. 
“He really is the sweetest thing,” Tomomi said. “No trouble at all, helpful as can be. Incredibly smart for his age—he’s leagues ahead of his classmates.” 
Like his brothers, Splinter thought, with a sort of dazed, wondering pride. All of them were happy little boys with distinct, dynamic personalities, but June—who had been a parent for one whole year longer than Splinter and had the added experience of helping to keep a dozen nieces and nephews alive, and was therefore the expert between the two of them—had often expressed surprise at how quickly the turtles tore through their learning material. 
Donatello was an unstoppable force that had yet to encounter an immovable object, but Raphael and Michelangelo were both well ahead of the curve, too. Splinter wondered, sometimes, if that had been part of Draxum’s design for them. 
“The younger kids adore him, though the older ones ostracize him a bit,” Tomomi was saying. “He’s had a number of failed placements, I’m afraid. Just bad luck.” She winced, as though the word left a bad taste on her tongue, and hurried to add, “It’s been hard on him since his friend moved away. He really deserves this. You’ll see.”
She was clearly trying to upsell the kid, as if to preemptively change Splinter’s mind about giving him up. As if there was any force in the universe that could even dream of being strong enough to compel him to do that. 
The orphanage as they walked through it was noisy. Kids in clothes that were second-hand but clean and well-fitting chased each other down hallways and in and out of rooms at speed. The building itself showed the inevitable wear and tear that came of hordes of children putting their marks on the place, but it was not dirty, or drafty, or in any sort of disrepair. No one looked hurt or underfed. There was a comfortable amount of clutter, plush toys and books and electronics scattered about the den they passed by. In all corners of the house there was shrieking and laughter and the thunder of little running feet. 
Yoshi was feeling a hundred thousand things right now, all of them in immediate conflict with each other and jostling for first place, but relief was chief among them. He had, in a shadowy corner in the back of his mind, feared the worst upon hearing his child was living in an orphanage. At a glance, the bulk of those fears were dispelled. It was good to know that he probably would not have to raze this place to the ground for their poor treatment of Blue. He could not imagine that would endear him to Helena. 
Tomomi leaned into an open doorway and called out, “Ren, please find Kameko and have him meet me in my office, okay? It’s important that he comes quickly.”
“Okay, Miss Toto!” someone called back, and then a tiny otter yokai went zipping away.
“I don’t know all of his hiding spots, I’m afraid,” the matron murmured, opening another door further down the hall and inviting him inside. “I don’t want to take you on a wild goose chase and waste a second more of your time. You’ve waited long enough already.”
“Thank you,” Splinter said. He sank into the seat she offered him and twisted his fingers, a nervous tic that his eldest son had inherited from him directly. “You said—he’s ostracized by the older kids? Why?”
Tomomi moved around the office, preparing cups of tea with hot water from an electric kettle. She said, “Yokai are very superstitious, as you well know.” Splinter did not know, actually, but nodded to maintain the ruse that he had been a rat yokai his entire life. “Turtles are viewed as—well, lucky. But since every single one of Kameko’s placements failed for some reason or another, some of the children decided he must be an omen for bad luck instead of good. It’s silliness, Hamato-san. But as much as he claimed it never bothered him, I’m sure it must have.”
Splinter had to take a moment to absorb that. Blue was a miracle. The fact that he was alive at all—the Hamato clan in its entirety must have spent every scrap of its allotted good fortune for the next billion year
Bad luck, he thought with a bewildered scoff. Where?
He held the teacup between his hands but forgot what to do with it. He was doing his best to listen to Tomomi but all of his attention craned toward the door instead. Riveted to each pair of footsteps that thundered past, each bright, energetic voice, each unfamiliar spark of qi… 
Splinter stopped breathing a second before a knock sounded on the doorframe. 
“Miss Toto,” a young voice called. “Renren said you wanted to see me?”
Tomomi glanced at Splinter sidelong and then called back, “Come on in, sweetie. There’s someone here who wants to meet you.”
He was unaware of moving, but somehow Splinter turned in time to watch the door rattle open, and there he was. 
In a neat coral pink and cream-colored jinbei, knees dirty from playing outside. Not quite grown into his stripes yet, still huge bright red crescents that took up most of his face. Eyes the same color as Donatello’s, the same shape as Splinter’s. Alive. Healthy. Small for his age. The brightest thing in this little riverside town. 
Leonardo. Blue. 
A painfully dislocated piece of Splinter’s long-broken heart clicked neatly back into place.  
The boy blinked and then smiled widely. He was all at once perfectly charming, happy to be standing there. Tomomi smiled back at him like a knee-jerk reaction and ushered him inside. 
“Hi!” Blue said brightly. “Nice to meet you!” 
Splinter could only sit there and take him in. His smile. The sound of his voice. He was so alive. 
“Kameko, this is Hamato Yoshi-san,” Tomomi said, steering the turtle closer to Splinter’s seat. “He’s come all the way from the human world to find you.” 
Blue’s smile faltered for a split-second, giving away his confusion. He had probably been fed a lot of lines from people looking to adopt a lucky turtle into their family over the last eight years, but this one was brand new. 
It was hard to explain to his little face that he had been—left behind. That Splinter had spent the entirety of his life mourning him. That looking at him was like looking at a ghost. Splinter did the best he could, grateful that Tomomi stepped in to pick things up wherever he faltered. With her help, he didn’t make an entire mess of the conversation.
“I have brothers?” was the first question Blue asked when they had finished. “I really do?”
“Yes, you—here, you can look,” Splinter said clumsily, offering his phone again. Offering anything. 
The turtle looked up into his face, and then over at Tomomi, and only took it after their combined reassurances. He was hesitant with the device even then, as though half-expecting Splinter to change his mind and berate him for handling it at all. 
But when the camera roll came up, Blue’s breath hitched, and all his uncertainty blew clean away. He blew up one of the photos and swiped through them that way, full-screen snapshots of a life he had missed out on. He stared intently at each picture as though doing his best to memorize each one in as much time as he was allowed to look. 
“What,” he started to ask, and then darted a quick glance up at Splinter again. Splinter nodded, heart in his throat, and Blue dared to continue, “What are they like?”
Carefully, Splinter shifted closer, until he and his son were side by side. Reaching around him, Splinter said, “Raphael is your biggest brother, and a year older than you. He may appear spiky and imposing, but he is actually very sensitive, and fond of stuffed animals and Barbie movies. I call him Red because of his rosy diamond patterns.” 
Blue mouthed ‘Raphael,’ drinking him in. 
The next few pictures were a blurred mess, Splinter’s attempt at taking photos while managing chaos as his boys helped in the kitchen the morning of April’s tenth birthday. Finally he landed on a clear one of Orange, covered in a dusting of flour, a comically large mixing bowl of funfetti cake batter in his arms that he had insisted he could handle without help. 
“This is Michelangelo. He is the youngest, only seven now. He is silly and spirited and will probably take over the world one day. We’ll all be better off with him in charge, I think. He would work all day long to win a single smile from someone he loves. Can you guess what his nickname is?”
Blue traced his little brother’s sunny spots with his eyes, overwhelmed. Still he guessed correctly, a soft-spoken, “Orange.” 
“Yes,” Splinter said. “Our crazy Mikan.” 
“Then this is—” Blue said, swiping on his own to a picture of the only remaining sibling. “Purple?” 
“Mm. Donatello. He is about a minute older than you, if that. He is smarter than any one hundred people put together, and creates spectacular things out of scraps and discards. But he struggles to make himself understood, so often opts out of talking at all. It does not mean he does not have anything to say.” 
This final photo rattled Blue completely, because there was an obvious likeness there. Donatello’s striking eyes were a mirror image of Leonardo’s own. There was no argument to be had about it—they were related. 
Remembering Purple’s burdened little hope, Splinter can’t help but add, “I once made the comment to him that the two of you could be twins, because you hatched together, and you were inseparable for every moment after. Donatello has latched onto the idea. And because of who he is as a person, I’m pretty sure he will die on that hill.”
Tomomi looked politely confused by the slang, but Blue huffed out an involuntary laugh, which was Splinter’s goal in the first place. 
“What’s, um,” Blue asked, “my name? Those ones—they all match. They’re artists. We talked about them in class once. Did I—did I match, too?”
“You did,” Splinter replied at once, trying to sound completely normal about the question. “I named you Leonardo. You were fearless, you wanted to see everything, you wanted to be everyone’s friend. Nothing could slow you down.” He reached out, telegraphing every inch of the move as he made it, and cradled that precious striped face in one careful hand. “My little lion. My Baby Blue.”
Leonardo didn’t cry, though it looked like he would like to. He reached up and seized Splinter’s wrist in both hands instead, clinging with the disproportionate strength Splinter was used to from raising his brothers. The four turtles were meant to be weapons, genetically altered to that end, but Splinter had taken one look at the freshly mutated babies and instantly resolved that he would secure a normal life for them if it was the last thing he ever did.  
He felt every inch of that resolve rekindled in this moment. He would do anything. He would topple a hundred laboratories, fight a thousand warrior alchemists, survive a million rounds in the Battle Nexus. If that was what it took to keep his Blue, to bring him home. He would do all of that in a heartbeat. 
“Well,” Tomomi said, unselfconscious about the tears she was blotting away, “let’s just get a few things signed away, and Kame—ah, Leonardo can start the first day of his new life! Sweetie, how about you go and get your things packed? You can say goodbye to your friends, too.” 
Blue pressed his cheek more firmly into Splinter’s palm, not wanting to go. Not wanting to test the limits of this strange, perfect dream. Splinter understood completely, and would prefer that his second-youngest child never left his sight again. 
But he didn’t want Blue to be afraid. He didn’t want to teach him fear.
So Splinter packed away his own anxieties and said, “Why don’t you hold onto my phone for me? It seems I will have my hands full with paperwork. It would be a lot of help.”
“Okay,” the little turtle said, reluctantly drawing away. He kept the phone in a tight grip. “I’m a good helper. And a quick packer! I’ll be right back!” 
“Don’t forget to say goodbye!” Tomomi called after him, but she was only talking to an empty doorway, the door itself left open and Leonardo’s running footsteps already halfway down the hall. “I wish I could bottle up some of that energy and keep it for a rainy day,” she said lightheartedly, getting up to close the door herself.
“I know what you mean,” Splinter said, fully sincere.  
“We really don’t have a lot for you to sign here, since the Chamber has already processed the lion’s share of the paperwork, and he’s rightfully yours to begin with,” Tomomi explained. “I just need you to hear a few things.” 
Splinter nodded, giving her his complete, undivided attention for the first time since he arrived. She didn’t seem to know what to do with it, flustered as she shuffled through a drawer of file folders.
“Ka—Leonardo,” Tomomi corrected herself again ruefully, “has had a rather hard time. I’ll give you a copy of his file, since he’ll pop back in here at any moment, and I hate to discuss it in front of him, but it’s important for you to fully understand. He’s been handed a lot of disappointments in his life. Please be patient. It might take him a long time to really trust you.”
“Then it’s a good thing we have the rest of our lives,” Splinter said firmly. “Blue could be a crazy man-eating alien for all I care—but if he’s going to terrorize humans, he can do it at home.”
The pangolin yokai laughed. “I’ll quote you on that. I also wanted you to be aware that we had a bit of a scare recently. He used to go into town to practice kendo every evening. A few nights ago, some of the other students decided to run around and cause trouble by the hearth,” her curt tone made it clear what she thought about that, “and started a fire that consumed the house. Leonardo was one of two children trapped inside.” 
“A fire?” Splinter parroted, halfway out of his seat in a second. He thought of the densely populated town down the way, the rows of houses he had passed that were all made of wood and straw and rice paper. Houses that would go up like tinder with a single misplaced spark. 
His baby, in a burning house. 
“He was rescued, and only sustained some minor burns and smoke sickness,” Tomomi was quick to reassure. “We had the boys both seen by a healer first thing. I’m letting you know because I would want to know, and Leonardo is unlikely to mention it at all.”
For a moment, Splinter could only imagine the horrifying what-if scenario; what if Leonardo hadn’t been rescued? What if Splinter’s dream had come a day too late? What if they had discovered Leonardo had been alive and that they had already lost him a second time? What if they had never discovered him at all, and he had died as a child that everyone believed nobody wanted?
Yoshi, he could almost hear his mother scolding him, clear as day, what good does it do you to think about that? It did not happen. Life is happening now. You will miss it if you don’t pay attention. 
“Yes,” he said belatedly, bobbing his head. “Right. Anything at all you feel is important, please tell me.”
They only had ten or so minutes to talk before Blue came back at top speed. Along the way he had collected that little otter yokai, as well as a fluffy owl in a pink yukata and a lizard whose green scales shimmered into a dull yellow as Splinter watched. 
“Koko’s leaving again?” the lizard demanded. “Is Ren gonna get that whole room to himself now? That’s not fair.”
“Shut up,” the owl said to her sharply, then turned to ask, “Is he really leaving, Miss Toto?”
“I’m afraid so, Susumu,” the matron said. “Have you all said your goodbyes, darlings?”
The question caused the otter child to burst into tears instantly. Leonardo was quick to drop his bag, shove Splinter’s phone into the pocket of his shorts, and scoop his little foster sibling’s face up in his hands. 
“Renren, don’t cry! How am I supposed to be brave if the bravest person I know is crying, huh?”
“I’m not crying,” the otter sobbed miserably, “I’m just, just so happy for you!”
“Great, I won’t even have to miss you, because Ren’s gonna keep repeating every single stupid thing he’s ever heard you say,” the owl complained, but she put her winged arms around them both and squeezed. “Bye, Koko. I hope these are your people for real this time.”
“Thanks, Suzy,” Blue replied, bonking their heads together lightly. “Take care of yourself or I’ll haunt your dreams!”
“Haunt your dreams,” Ren parroted thickly. 
“And if you see Snowy—” Blue added in a quieter voice. 
“I’ll tell him everything, don’t worry,” Susumu said, and hefted Ren away with her when she stepped back into the hall. 
That left the lizard girl, who looked as though she wanted to shrivel into a tiny bug and disappear through the floorboards with the attention of everyone else focused on her. Shoulders hunched, she whacked Leonardo in the shins with her long tail. 
“I think you should start biting people,” she announced.
“Niji,” Tomomi said warningly. 
The lizard lifted her chin, scales shifting from yellow to defiant red. “I mean it. If this new dad is mean just bite the hell out of him. Then he’ll send you back here and no one else will want you and we can age out of the system together and go start a gang.”
“Niji!” 
“Deal,” Blue said, and they shook on it. It was precious. 
Later, when all goodbyes had been made and Blue had been cried on by the pangolin matron and it was finally just the two of them making the journey back into town, Blue looked up at Splinter and said, “I won’t really��bite you, Hamato-san. I just wanted to make Niji feel better. She tries to sound mean but she worries a lot.” 
“You have my full permission to take a bite out of any grown-up who tries to hurt you in any way,” Splinter said, smiling at him. He was carrying his child’s bag over his shoulder with one hand, the other clutched tight in both of Blue’s. “And you can call me whatever makes you comfortable, but Hamato-san is a little stuffy, don’t you think? If you don’t want to try ‘dad,’ how about Splinter?”
“Splinter?” Leonardo bounced on his feet. “Is that a code-name? Do you have a secret identity?”
The walk was long, but it went by quickly, peppered by question after question once Blue seemed to realize Splinter did not mind answering them. 
Where do you live? Have you always lived there? What’s California like? What’s New York City like? Do you know lots of humans? Are they nice? Who’s April? Will my brothers like me? 
Splinter answered, and explained, and reassured. Mostly, he listened to Blue’s animated voice that did its best to fill any empty space it found. Blue was not the jaded, angry child that Splinter himself once was, even if he had just as much—if not more—reason to be. But he was not a naïve boy, either. Hope had been all but trained out of him by now, the way it had clearly been trained out of Niji back at the orphanage. It was still there, clinging on with the tips of its fingers, but only just. 
And when Splinter tilted his head back and laughed at the clever joke Blue came up with on the spot, he saw that fragile little hope peeking out at him in the form of a crooked smile, shy and earnest and daring. 
Afternoon had given way to evening by the time they arrived at the edge of town where the cab was waiting. The driver, a skeleton yokai, was a local, and seemed happy to idle there and let the meter run since it was on the City’s dime. 
He glanced up from his sudoku book when Splinter and Blue approached and belted out, “Well, look who it is! Hey, kiddo!” 
“Hi Benny!” Blue shouted back. “¿Cómo estás?”
“Estoy bien, niño. And you’re doing just fine, too, huh? Guess I won’t be giving you many rides anymore. Hopefully this one sticks.”
Despite his flippant tone, the last remark was clearly aimed at Splinter. Splinter, for his part, held his son’s hand a little tighter and tried not to let the implications sting. Blue was so used to being shuttled back and forth that he was on first-name basis with the guy doing the shuttling. Blue had a reputation in this town as being an unwanted, oft-returned orphan. 
Splinter was simultaneously offended by anyone who would deem his precious child an unworthy addition, and endlessly grateful he had not been snatched up before his family had a chance to claim him. 
“This one,” Splinter said, flinty, “will stick.”
The driver muttered something in Spanish that made Blue muffle giggles behind his hand, and Splinter magnanimously decided to ignore that. The two grown-ups affected a playful antagonism for the duration of the hour and a half car ride, bantering back and forth, because anything that made Blue forget himself enough to lean forward against his seatbelt and fill the cab with chatter was worth doing. 
Benny did not let them go after dropping them off until Splinter agreed to bring the children to visit Benny’s cousin’s restaurant in Neo Edo sometime soon. Only then did he lower a bony hand out the driver’s side window so that Blue could bounce forward and bump their fists together.
“Nos vemos, chiquito,” the skeleton cabbie said fondly. “Have a good life, got it? We’ll have problems if you don’t.” 
He pointed warningly at Splinter, letting him know exactly who the problems would be had with.  
“See you, Benny!” Leonardo said. His eyes were wet, but he did not let his bright smile slip an inch. Splinter had worked with professional actors less talented than this nine year old boy. “I’ll be good, promise!”
“You are already good,” Splinter couldn’t help but interject, brushing a hand over the crown of the little turtle’s head. “That’s quite enough of that. Let’s be happy instead.” 
——
Raphael’s initial impression of his newest little brother was that he was very brave. 
He was tiny, not much bigger than Mikey, with bright yellow stripes on his arms and legs, and two big red ones on his face that curved over his cheeks and eyes. Pops carried him into the lair when he first brought Leonardo home, because the tunnels that wound to and around their house were dark and maze-like. Sometimes Raphie got lost in them if he strayed too far and he’d lived there forever. 
Raph remembered thinking how small Leo was, in a huge, confusing place, surrounded by people he had never met before. It would have been overwhelming for anybody, but he didn’t cry at all. He smiled instead, big and silly, like there was nothing in his whole life he needed to be scared of, actually. 
As Raph got to know him, he realized that Leo very rarely wasn’t smiling. 
He was even smiling a little bit as he poked his head through Raphie’s doorway in the middle of the night.  
“Hi,” Leo whispered, even though he could tell Raph was awake. 
He was doing that thing he always did, greeting first and then hanging back to make sure he was welcome. He never just walked into a room or jumped into a conversation. Raph probably wouldn’t have noticed Leo did that if he hadn’t heard Aunt Junie and Pops talking about it a few days ago. 
Raph wiped his eyes on his blanket quickly and tried to sound like he hadn’t been crying. 
“Hi, Leo. C’mere.”
The smaller turtle crossed the room at a run, climbing up into the bed and under the offered comforter. Raph pulled it up over both their heads when he was settled. The dark, warm space beneath the blanket felt the way Raph imagined the inside of his shell would feel if he could hide there. He squeezed Lamby until she glowed from the star on her belly and laid her between them so they had just enough light to see each other by. 
It was a familiar ritual for Raph. It was what he always did for Mikey and Donnie when they sought him out after bedtime. 
“Are you okay?” Leo asked in his quietest voice. 
“I’m okay,” Raph assured him quickly, feeling stupid about the tacky feeling on his cheeks and his puffy eyes. “Don’t worry about Raph.” When Leo’s brow wrinkled, not comprehending why he shouldn’t worry if he felt like it, Raph quickly said, “What about you, buddy? Why are you up?”
He had definitely been asleep when Raph had peeked in on him and Donnie earlier, but that didn’t mean a whole lot. Leo only seemed to sleep for a couple hours at a time. He always dragged his feet at bedtime, as though a good night’s rest was a concept that applied to other turtles, but not to him. If he didn’t share a room with his twin, it would probably be impossible to convince him to go to bed at all. Raph wasn’t looking forward to the contest of wills they’d probably have every single evening once Leo’s bedroom was finished.  
‘Miss Toto says I’m a night owl,’ Leo had announced at breakfast during his first week at home when Pops asked him how he slept. ‘I don’t know what kind of turtle that is.’ 
Mikey giggled, and Donnie said, ‘It’s not a kind of turtle, it’s an idiom.’
Overly-offended, Leo squawked, ‘You can’t just call people idioms!’
The conversation got so silly from there that Pops forgot about asking in the first place. Leo was really good at making people forget they asked questions. But that just made Raph hold onto his questions really tight until he got an answer. Even if it didn’t really matter—he didn’t want Leo thinking he could get away with sneaking around it when it did matter. 
His little brother’s eyes were big and dark in the blanket cave. Sure enough, he didn’t try to weasel out of answering. 
“Sometimes I lived in places where I couldn’t sleep,” he said. “I got used to it.” 
“Why couldn’t you?” Raph asked, frowning. 
“In one house it was really noisy,” Leo said easily enough. “The badger family that lived there was crepuscular. That meant they mostly were awake before the sun came out. Just a little bit of noise is enough to wake me up, so I started being crepuscular , too. Only kendo practice and all of my school classes were in the daytime, so it didn’t work out.” 
To Raph, that sounded a lot like Leo wasn’t able to sleep at night and didn’t have time to sleep during the day. He can feel anger stirring deep in his heart, because it wasn’t fair. That badger family got to have Raph’s brother when he should have been here, and they didn’t even take care of him. How hard could it have been to give one little turtle a quiet place to rest? Pops found a quiet place for four of them in New York City.  
He reached around Leo to lay a hand flat on his carapace. The scutes there were hard and smooth, unlike Donnie’s spiny, leathery shell and Raph’s rough spiky one. It was slightly flatter than Mikey’s domed shape, but otherwise entirely familiar. And it was second-nature to rub in slow up-and-down motions, because that’s just what you did with little turtle shells when the little turtles inside couldn’t sleep. 
Leo blinked a couple times, all fast and surprised, as if he’d never had a shell-rub before in his life. Raph hoped that wasn’t true. 
“Why are you up?” Leo asked, never one to be waylaid for long. 
Fair was fair. Raph felt embarrassed about it, but since Leo had answered his question, he said truthfully, “I had a bad dream.”
He was maybe a little bit prepared for Leo to laugh or make fun or—something. But Leo said, “Sorry, Raphie. Bad dreams are the worst. Do you want to talk about it, or talk about something else?”
It sounded very practiced, like he had either said it a lot or heard it a lot before tonight. But it still loosened a tight little fist deep in Raph’s chest somewhere that was clutching really hard to worry. 
Carefully, each word picking its tentative way out, Raphie described the dream he’d had the best he could. It had already faded from memory for the most part. The definite edges were gone and all that was left was the nightmare soup—the dark room and his pounding heart and the loneliness that was big enough to eat him whole if it wanted to. 
“I dreamed I didn’t have anybody,” he mumbled out. “I was all alone. It felt like I’d be alone forever.”
“I had one like that before,” Leo said quietly. “I ran all the way to Snowy’s house to make sure he was there. He let me in through his window and we had a sleepover. Why didn’t you have a sleepover with Donnie or Mikey? You wouldn’t even get in trouble for leaving the house like I did since they’re just right down the hall.” 
“I’m the biggest,” Raph said, the truth of his life that had always been and always would be. “I’m responsible for you bozos. I look after you three, not the other way around.” 
He made sure Leo knew it wasn’t a bad thing, poking him playfully on the end of his beak until he scrunched it up. It wasn’t a bad thing. It was the best thing about being Raph. 
“All by yourself?” Leo asked. “Everybody needs help. Even Jupiter Jim has a sidekick.”
Ever since his siblings had shown him those movies, Leo was a big fan. And it was hard to argue his logic, because Red Fox was a character they all loved beyond reason, and Raph would never dream of saying Jupiter Jim didn’t need her. 
But it was different. 
Raph knew that he could be bossy. He didn’t mean to be. Sometimes it took Donnie crossing his arms and baring his teeth to make Raph realize he’d been nagging. Sometimes he didn’t know until Mikey started shouting that Raph had been talking over him. He really didn’t mean to. 
He just hated not knowing what was going to happen. Every accident and surprise—Donnie wandering out of his room for bandaids when his latest build managed to cut past his gloves, Mikey’s experimental stir fry setting off the smoke alarms, Pops juggling too many things at once and dropping something that shattered on the floor—made Raph feel sick. It made him feel unsafe. 
“I just want to be careful,” Raph managed to force out. “That’s all. I don’t want anything bad to happen. I don’t want it to be my fault. I don’t want to mess up and let you guys down. I don’t wanna be—”
Alone. 
Leo nodded solemnly, his cheek pressed against the pillow. Eyes all big and serious and older than the face they peered out of. 
“You’re the best big brother I’ve ever met,” he said, sounding so certain that Raph was a second too slow to doubt him. “You care so much. You care enough for a hundred turtles. I didn’t know anybody could have a heart that big.”
Raph blinked, feeling fresh tears sting his eyes and slide down his face. Donnie would have frozen in distress, like the whole world stopped spinning when one of his siblings was hurting and Donnie stopped spinning right along with it. Mikey would have jumped in for a sticky octopus-style hug, because there was nothing broken that he couldn’t fix by wrapping his arms around it and holding on tight. 
Leo didn’t freeze and he didn’t jump in. He landed somewhere in the middle of those extremes, shuffling closer and putting his problem-solving face on. He tugged on a corner of the sheets beneath them until enough of the blanket came up that he could use it to wipe Raph’s face free of tears. He did everything so earnestly, as if each tiny moment meant the world to him.  
“But guess what?” he went on. “Everybody cares about you that much, too. I can’t even think of something you could do that would make us not want to see you every single day. If you were ever alone it’d only be ‘cause you got lost, and then we’d just burn the whole city down to find you again. We’d never leave you behind.” 
Leo smiled, not the big shining one. This one was different, lopsided and sweet. Raph had only seen this smile of Leo’s a handful of times and it was already so important to him. 
“You know that in your heart, I think,” Leo said. “You just get stuck in your head, that’s all.”
“Yeah,” Raph whispered, feeling wobbly and see-through. 
“It’s okay, Raphie. I can remind you. Just give half of what you’re worried about to me and we’ll share it. I’m on your team! I’m your sidekick! Nothing’s as scary when you have backup. As long as I’m here you don’t have to be scared of anything.” 
Raph’s words got stuck in his throat. He had no idea what he might have said if they hadn’t. Instead he pulled Leo in snug against his plastron, safe beneath his arm. Lamby ended up smushed between them and her glow turned off. Leo wasn’t afraid of the dark, so it was for Raphie’s sake when he worked the stuffed animal free and squeezed the light in her middle back on. 
Maybe Raph cared enough for a hundred turtles, but Leo was brave enough for a thousand. He wasn’t afraid of anything. 
“Deal. And as long as I’m here,” Raph said, “you can sleep.”
“Raphie, I told you,” Leo complained. “I’m a night-owl-badger-turtle. Can I just play Professor Layton on your DS? I’ll be really quiet.”
But Raph knew all the tricks. He put his hand back on that slim shell and scritched idly along the blue-patterned scutes. Leo’s eyes drooped almost immediately, though his big frown was slower to fade. He was so small and so stubborn and Raphael loved him completely.
“Everything you wanna do tomorrow will still be there when you wake up,” he said, borrowing those words straight from Pops, as well as the fond tone he said them in. His own bad dream was the last thing on his mind. It was easy to smile and add on, “You can sleep. Raph’s not gonna let anyone bother you. I’m on your team, too.”
Leo didn’t reply right away. He leaned back enough to look up at Raph as though he was waiting for him to take it back. When he didn’t, because of course he didn’t, Leo curled his arm tighter around Lamby and tucked his head back under Raph’s chin and didn’t say anything at all. 
Raphael imagined what it would have been like to grow up together—having Leo’s certainty and cleverness in his corner when Raph didn’t know what to do, Leo’s courage and silliness when Raph was scared, Leo’s smile that made the darkness shrink no matter how big and impossible it seemed to be at first. 
Imagining it made Raph’s heart ache. He thought about the future instead, and how they’d live in it together forever, and keep each other safe and make each other brave.
When Leo finally dozed off, Raph was only a few minutes behind him. He didn’t have any more bad dreams.
——
Sometimes Mikey felt like he had to shout to be heard. 
Raph and Donnie were his big brothers, and they were also his best friends and secret-keepers and partners-in-crime, but Mikey was their little brother first. He just wished that wasn’t the only thing he was. 
Donnie liked Mikey’s company and never kicked him out of his room, but Mikey wasn’t allowed to touch anything in there, because Donnie didn’t know how to share. Raphie loved to carry Mikey when he got tired or the stormwater runoff in the tunnels was steep, but he didn’t seem to understand that sometimes Mikey didn’t want to be carried. He could walk just fine on his own! He could outrun all of his siblings, actually, without even breaking a sweat. 
Michelangelo knew that he was loved—he had never wasted a single second wondering about that—and he loved his family so much that he could fill the sky with it the way the sun filled it with light in the summertime. 
But he wasn’t listened to. It would be nice to just be listened to sometimes. 
Today Mikey watched avidly as Leo showed off his cool sword. He had been folded into their afternoon martial arts training seamlessly, like he’d always been there. Dad assessed his skill-level and announced that he was not very far behind the rest of them at all, because he had been training in something he called kenjutsu ever since he was little. 
“You are little, pipsqueak,” Raphie said playfully.
“Everyone’s a pipsqueak to you!” Leo retorted.
Splinter smiled proudly and said, “My Blue. You’ll be unstoppable one day, you know that?” Leo radiated joy at Dad’s approval and threw himself headlong into learning ninjutsu alongside his kendo, eager to do well. So he split his time, and in the last half Leo broke away from his brothers to the other side of the dojo, where he practiced the sword. 
He hadn’t brought much with him when he moved in, but his bokken was his pride and joy. It was made of shiny red wood and the handle was wrapped in bright blue cord and there was a little white rabbit charm dangling from the guard. 
“Last year Snowy’s big sister snuck up to the human world for a senior trip with her friends, and she brought us both souvenirs when she came back,” Leo had explained the charm happily. “Like hush money, only bunny-shaped! So way better.”
Dad snorted, and Leo seemed to grow two inches taller at having made him laugh. 
Unlike everything else he owned, Leonardo didn’t offer the sword out to be held or touched. It wasn’t quite like the way Donnie guarded the things important to him, because Mikey didn’t think Leo would hiss at anybody for getting too close—Leo probably wouldn’t even get mad. But at seven whole years old, Mikey knew a thing or two about hurt feelings. If Leo wasn’t willing to snap at somebody for taking his stuff, Mikey would just have to do it for him. 
An hour into training, Mikey was about to snap for a different reason. 
“Mikey, you’re doing it wrong,” Raph said again. “You keep going too fast.” 
“I know, ” Mikey said back through his teeth. He’d done it a billion times, he knew that. Raph didn’t need to keep saying it. 
“If you know, then do it the right way,” his biggest brother replied, not giving an inch. “I know cartwheels are fun but we’re doing kata now. You can play later.”
Frustration boiled inside him. Mikey knew the right way to do the forms, but he was bored. He wanted to do it faster, he wanted to add a flip or a handstand, something to make it more interesting. He didn’t like training at all sometimes—Donnie was quiet and unenthusiastic, and Raphie was bossy and made them start over until they got it right. It was better when April was there, because April could quell the boringest and bossiest of brothers with a single sharp look and then take Mikey out for froyo, but their sister only joined in on the weekends. 
Leo glanced sidelong at Splinter as he slowly began to lean his bokken up against the wall. When Dad didn’t stop him, he put the sword down quicker, then trotted over to fearlessly interject himself into the middle of the brewing storm. Donnie watched him go with round eyes, always one to remain adamantly on the outside of any confrontation.  
“That was really cool, Mike,” Leo called out, beaming. 
Mikey, who had been clenching his fists and preparing himself for another big brother to gang up on him, blinked. 
“Huh? Really?”
“Yeah, really! I can kind of do a handstand, but I can’t flip all around like that.” He thumped his knuckles on Raph’s carapace as he passed by, but his shining smile was all for Mikey. “Can you teach me?”
“Really?” Mikey said again, and then excitement swooped in before he could be confused for longer than a second. Bouncing on his toes, he exclaimed, “Of course, Lee! I can teach you right now!”
“I still have to learn this tricky ninja stuff first,” Leo said. “Can we do it after training instead?” 
“Sure! I can help you with the kata, too, I’m really good at it,” Mikey said eagerly, falling into line beside him. He demonstrated the proper form carefully, so that his newest big brother could follow along. “Like that, see? You’ll get it! Try with me this time!” 
He didn’t realize he was mimicking the same thing Raphael told him every time he fumbled in the dojo—his mind jumped straight to the first helpful thing he could say and that was it. He also didn’t catch the wink Leo sent at Raph over his head, or the way Raph’s shoulders loosened from where they had been bunched up by his ears, the way they always bunched up before a disagreement. 
When Leo first came home, Aunt Junie had said that they all needed to be patient with each other and give Leo time to adjust. Like when Piebald’s tank water needed to be changed and they had to do it a little bit at a time, because even a whole bunch of good, fresh and clean water would be bad for her all at once. 
Aunt Junie was right about everything, but maybe she just didn’t know Leo well enough yet. Maybe Leo wasn’t like Piebald at all, and jumping straight into a brand new tank was actually the best thing for him. 
Because Leo seemed so happy to be there, always smiling and in a good mood. Teasing Donnie like he knew exactly where to poke to elicit playful snaps instead of vicious ones—talking Raph’s ear off about the Disney movies their big brother watched with him and singing along once he knew the words—forming inside jokes and super-complicated extended handshakes with April within minutes of meeting her—following gamely wherever Mikey tugged him along to like he couldn’t wait to be a part of the fun. 
The immediate problem was that Donnie, Raph and April loved Leo just as much as Mikey did, and they all wanted to spend time with him, too. But they didn’t always want to spend that time doing the same things. That afternoon, it became an issue.  
“Me and Leo always watch a movie after lunch,” Raphie was saying, brow knit stubbornly. 
“Yeah, so let him do something else for a change,” April replied, poking Raph in the shoulder with the corner of her bedazzled phone case. “I told him about Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of Nimh and he wanted to read it. I downloaded the audiobook for us to listen to.”
“Can’t you do that later?”
“We’re building something,” Donnie bit out, impatient enough to speak up instead of just slinking away on his own. 
For his part, Mikey tugged on Leo’s sleeve. “Leeeee, color with meeee.”
Leo didn’t say anything to any of them. He seemed to be frozen in place by all their noise.
Once, when Mikey was way littler than he was now, Dad found a baby bird that had been swept through a grate into the tunnel during a heavy rain. He let Mikey hold it after Mikey promised he’d be careful. They emailed a video of the bird to a wildlife rescue person they found online who said that it looked about three weeks old, and had probably only just left the nest when it hurt its wing. It was a quivering palm-sized ball of brown feathers and beady eyes. Mikey could feel its frantic heartbeat in his hands. It didn’t look big enough to have left its nest. It was hard to believe anything that small could just be on its own in the world. 
Right now Leo reminded Mikey of that bird. His smile had faded to almost nothing, eyes round and worried under their bright red stripes. The longer the arguing went on around him the bigger and more worried his eyes got. 
Then Dad said, “ Enough.”
He had his disappointed frown on as he strode in from the kitchen, sleeves still rolled up from washing the dishes in the sink. He didn’t miss a beat in lifting Leo up into his arms.
“What did your Aunt June tell you all?” Dad said sternly. He included April in his pointed look, even though Aunt Junie was mom to her. “If the four of you can learn to share pizza and video games without killing each other, surely you can learn to share your brother’s time.”
They all shuffled, feeling scolded, and April was the one who said, “Sorry, Leon.”
“It’s okay!” Leo said immediately, smiling brightly at her. But he was still clutching Dad’s shirt with both hands and wasn’t squirming to get down even a little bit. It made Mikey feel bad all the way to the bottom of his stomach. 
“Why don’t you let Blue decide what he wants to do this afternoon?” Splinter suggested in that tone that made it obvious it wasn’t actually a suggestion. 
“Yeah, Leo, you should pick!” Mikey said right away. 
Leo hummed, looking much more like his normal self than he did a moment ago, but he still had one fist bunched in Splinter’s sleeve. Very, very carefully, like he was afraid it wasn’t the right thing to say, Leo offered, “Raphie, you said you’d show me how to skate. Can we?”
“Sure, big man, that sounds fun!” Raph said, all fast. He came over and put out his hands, and when Leo reached back, Splinter allowed the snapper to take him. Raph tossed Leo in the air and caught him again, surprising a squeaky noise out of him that became a giggle. The mood in the lair shifted back towards bright, like magic. “You’re gonna be skating circles around me in no time, Fearless.”
“I wanna watch!” Mikey shouted gleefully. And even though Donnie hated sports, he settled next to Mikey to watch, too, close enough that their shoulders bumped. When Mikey swayed playfully to the side, it made Donnie sway, too. 
April rolled her eyes, like it was very typical of one of her little brothers to want to waste the afternoon skateboarding, but she insisted upon getting pictures of Leo all kitted out in borrowed helmet and knee- and elbow-pads, in poses that got sillier and sillier by the second.  
The afternoon raced by like it had somewhere important to be, punctuated by the rolling and click-clacking of skateboard wheels on the wooden ramp. Leo learned to ollie and shuvit, picking up speed and gaining confidence as he went, but he also learned a lesson the rest of his siblings had learned years and years ago. 
He learned to trust Raph’s hands to catch him. He learned not to be scared of falling because Raph would always catch him. 
In no time at all, Leo’s laughter was bursting out of him in bright, ringing peals. It was easy to forget, just for a minute, that he hadn’t been right there with them all along.  
Mikey felt like there was a sun inside him, he was so happy. He didn’t know what to do with all of it, where he could possibly hold it. So he did what he always did when he felt too much. He popped inside his shell. 
From outside, there was an instant clatter and a thud, the fast-rolling sound of a loose skateboard shooting away, and April calling out, “Woah, Leo, are you—”
Then Mikey felt the familiar sensation of being picked up. His shell was compact and the perfect size for other little turtles to hold. Mikey felt warm and snug, and loved to be held, so he just curled up happily like a cat in a box. 
Outside, he heard them talking.
“He didn’t mean to!” Leo said, so fast it was all a jumble of words bumping into themselves. 
“Who didn’t—Mikey?” Raph said. “‘Course he did, he does that all the time.”
“No, he—he’s good, he doesn’t—” Leo sounded alarmingly like he was going to start crying—something Mikey hadn’t even known it was possible for him to do. “Please don’t let him get in trouble, he’s good. He’ll be good.”
“Of course he is good,” Splinter said, his voice coming closer from where he had been keeping an eye on them from the sofa. He sounded the way he did when Mikey or one of his brothers was sick, worry and love all twisted together. “All of my babies are good. Even when they are dissecting kitchen appliances or flooding the bathroom or sneaking the last donut out of the box that I had been saving, April.”
“I have no idea what you mean,” April said unconvincingly. “What’s a donut?”
“Mmm-hm. That crazy little citrus fruit you are holding is not in trouble, Baby Blue,” Splinter added. 
“Why would he be in trouble?” Raph asked, sounding like something was hurting him. 
“Sorry! I had different rules before,” Leo replied. The arms holding Mikey’s shell were tight, and he could hear the heart he was being held against racing, quick and frantic thump-thump-thumps. “I’m really sorry!”
“No one needs to be sorry,” Splinter told him gently. “No one has done anything wrong. And for future reference, in case you are confused, you will never be punished for hiding inside your shell. You are a turtle, and it is an important part of you. Would you scold a caterpillar for spinning a cocoon?”
“No,” Leo whispered. 
“There you are.”
There was a beat of silence, heavy and thick. Mikey wanted to come out and look around but he thought that if he interrupted the conversation they would start to talk about something else. 
“It wasn’t that bad,” Leo finally said. “I was only there for a little bit, the house where they—so it wasn’t that bad.”
“I’ll be the judge of that,” Donnie said in a loud voice. He said it like ‘judge’ meant ‘monster who bites people until they die,’ even though Mikey was pretty sure it didn’t.
It surprised Mikey at first when Donnie started interjecting loudly at things, because he never used to do that. His jokes were always ones slid in under his breath, and his smile when they made Mikey laugh would be quick and sideways and half-hidden in the collar of his bulky hoodie. 
Now he didn’t hide near as much as he used to, and was a lot less secretive about things he wanted his brothers to hear. Mikey thought that maybe he had wanted to be close to them all along, he just didn’t know how to get there. There wasn’t a bridge between where they were at and the island he ended up on. Then his twin came along. 
Aunt Junie called Leo an instigator. She said it laughingly, and told him he was just what this family needed. She was, after all, right about everything. 
“We’ll discuss it later,” Splinter said. He came closer, and Mikey’s stomach swooped as he was lifted up higher from the floor than he already was—Dad must have picked Leo up again, and Leo was still holding Mikey. “Come here, my little turtles. Ah-ah, you are not getting out of this, O’Neil. In fact, you must hug twice as hard so that your mother is here in spirit.”
Silliness was the best medicine. No gloomy mood could outlast six people cramming together for a big group hug. Raph tripped on the skateboard and almost toppled everyone over and the sudden lurch made Leo giggle. Mikey came out of his shell to join the embrace, managing to get one arm around Leo and the other around Donnie and squeezing for all he was worth. 
Mikey and his brothers kept close to each other even after Splinter left to take April home. A pillow fort was constructed in the TV room and they turtle-piled in there with all the best blankets and stuffed animals and snacks. Leo was quieter than usual and sat tucked against Donnie’s side, like he was absorbing his twin’s strength and stubbornness since his own had run out. 
“Hey, Leo?” Mikey asked, when the movie Bolt was over and Raph was snoring and Donnie was a tiny ball tucked under the snapper’s sprawled arm. Mikey knew that Leo would still be awake.
Sure enough, Leo said, “Yeah?” 
“Why don’t you cry when you’re sad?”
For a little while, the only sound besides Raph’s honking snores was the song playing on TV as the credits rolled. I made a wish upon a star, I turned around, and there you were, the song went. 
“People don’t like kids who cry,” Leo finally said. “No one will want me if I don’t behave.”
Mikey blinked, turning his head to find Leo’s face in the dark. His heart was twisting around unhappily in his chest. It hurt. 
“Raph cries all the time but we still want him,” Mikey said. “He’s Raph.”
“Yeah, of course,” Leo said quickly.
“And I cry, too,” Mikey added, the hurt moving up into his throat. “People want me.”
“Because you’re the best, Angie,” Leo told him. “You guys are the best.”
“Whoever told you that stuff before lied,” Mikey said, clinging to his hand. “They lied. You’re my Leo, and you belong here, and we want you. Don’t ever leave us no matter what. Okay?”
Leo nodded, short and punchy. He was shivering like he was cold. Mikey scooted over so he could curl into Leo’s side, because he was a lot of things, but he was a little brother first. And sometimes—when that meant that he was always welcome, and arms would always open for him, and he could snuggle in and be held tight no matter what—that was the best first thing to be. 
“Promise?” he checked.
Leo turned his face, so he could press his cheek to the top of Mikey’s head, and whispered, “Promise.”
The thing Mikey remembered the most vividly about that injured bird they once found was how restless it had been. How ready to fly it was. All it needed was room to get better and grow a little more. A safe place to land. 
‘Look at this guy,’ Dad had said the morning they released it, smiling at the eager noises happening in the shoebox in his hands, ‘ready to leave us in the dust.’ 
‘Will he come back?’ Raphie asked.
‘I don’t think so, my dear. This isn’t his home.’
It was Leo’s home, though. His place to come back to. They just had to keep showing him that they’d catch him. It wasn’t scary to fall down here, because someone would always catch him.  
——
A true photographic memory had never been proven, but Donatello was a scientific marvel in more ways than just the obvious. He remembered everything he had ever seen. The farther back his memories went the less clarity they retained, until they were mostly just emotion given body and movement—but they still were.
When Donnie, Mikey and Raphie found the shrine in Papa’s room, and Papa sat them all down to explain that they used to have another brother, who couldn’t be with them anymore, Donnie suddenly remembered a steady weight on his shell. He remembered not being able to settle for bed unless the weight was there, clicking and purring until they both drifted off to sleep. 
Oh, he thought, we’re orphans. 
The thought didn’t make sense, because Donnie knew what the definition of orphan was, and their parent hadn’t died. He had never abandoned them. He was, at that moment, gently wiping tears off Raphie’s face and trying to come up with answers for Mikey’s endless questions that didn’t all boil down to life is unfair. 
But it was the only word that felt weighty enough for the truth of it all. 
Donnie was a brother who had lost a brother. A twin who wasn’t a twin anymore. There wasn’t a word for that. He looked it up. 
And then, when Donnie was eight years old, he didn’t need a word for it anymore. 
When he had imagined Leonardo growing up, he imagined someone who was just like him in every way. Someone who understood him effortlessly because they were two halves of a whole. Ten minutes after meeting him again, Donatello felt silly about his initial hypothesis. 
Of course his twin would be his polar opposite—they filled in each other’s empty spaces. Leonardo, who was friendly and talkative, spoke up when Donnie’s voice failed him; Donatello, who was observant and defiant, had no trouble baring his teeth at every hurt that Leonardo would have let roll off his back. 
Leonardo lied with every inch of his body and he did it cheerfully; Donnie would always default to the truth even if a lie would have been kinder. Donnie wanted so badly to be close to his brothers but didn’t always know how to get there, a closed door standing between them that he didn’t have a key to; Leonardo had never met a locked door he couldn’t circumvent and pointed out a neat shortcut here, a handy window there. 
Leo took Donnie’s hand and led the way forward; Donnie held on tight and made sure Leo didn’t stumble, since he was always looking up and never down. 
They found each other in the middle. Maybe if they’d had that middle place all along, Donnie would be able to communicate better, and Leo wouldn’t need to pretend so much. Maybe that’s still the way things would be one day. Donnie imagined a drawing of them, purple leaking past his lines and blue leaking out of Leo, like Mikey’s watercolors mixing on the page, spreading until they filled every gap, completing the picture.
All four turtles were in the dojo, doing cool-down stretches. Mikey had skipped the post-exercise routine and moved on to rolling around on his carapace instead, singing Fireflies to himself with twice as much energy as Owl City. Raph just rolled his eyes and made sure to step around and over his littlest brother as he cleaned up. 
Splinter, who had been checking his phone repeatedly all afternoon, stood up swiftly and said, “You boys stay here and finish up. I think we’ll order in for supper today, so agree on something or I will order the worst soup you can think of. ”
Mikey stopped rolling and sat up with a horrified gasp, because he had opinions about soup. 
“Manhattan Clam Chowder!” 
Ignoring that, Splinter said, “I will be right back.”
Donnie watched Leo watch him go, and knew that his twin’s mind was racing even though his breezy smile hadn’t budged an inch. Leo worried constantly, maybe even more than Raphie did. He was always buzzing with what-ifs, like his brain was a jar filled with angry bees—what if he did something wrong? What if he made someone mad? What if he was too noisy, took too much at supper, didn’t help enough with chores, what if, what if, what if? 
Donnie knew, because sometimes Leo told him. After bedtime, when they had to whisper so Splinter’s keen ears wouldn’t catch them staying up late, sometimes Leo would ask, “Did I mess up today?” 
And Donnie would have to jerk his thoughts onto this new track—this crooked, narrow road that Leo was always running on, with its confusing roundabouts and bridges to nowhere and unpayable tolls. 
He wanted to say that Leo could mess up a billion times and still never reach the end of Donnie’s love. Like how the unobservable universe was so big that light from the Big Bang still hadn’t reached Earth from over there. It was as big as that. 
But Donnie struggled with words even when they weren’t monumentally important ones. And Leo’s face would look so afraid in the dim light of the glow-in-the-dark stickers on the ceiling, those constellations in Leo’s new room that matched the ones in Donnie’s down to the last star. He would be convinced that this was the day he did something bad enough that Papa sent him away. It didn’t matter that that would never happen, because even impossible things could be scary.  
So instead of what he wanted to say, Donnie would tell him, “You were good.” 
It would always make his brother smile and sink into the pillow, like all that worry was the only thing propping him up. Then they would talk about a hundred other things until they forgot to whisper, and Papa or Raph inevitably found them out and carted a giggling Leo or an unrepentant Donnie off to his own room. 
One day, Donnie was determined to make it stick. Even if Leonardo was the worst person in the whole world, he would still be Donatello’s person. That made him the best. It was unquantifiable. No one was a better subject matter expert than Donnie was. He’d stake the scientific reputation he didn’t have yet on it in a heartbeat. 
For now, he nudged Leo’s knee with his foot. 
“Hey,” Donnie said, “let’s be ninjas.”
Leo’s smile turned into the grin that Donnie preferred, the crooked laughing one. He only cared about good behavior when he thought he was being graded on it. Otherwise he was the first to encourage sneakiness, because if there was one thing Leonardo believed in, it was having all the information available all the time. 
Donnie knew that was how Leo kept himself safe in those other places he lived in before he came home, those places he didn’t like to talk about. The ones that taught him not to cry when he was sad and not to hide in his shell when he was scared. 
If there was one thing Donatello believed in, it was that Leo should feel safe, even if that meant breaking a rule or two or a hundred. 
“Where do you two think you’re going?” Raphie said suspiciously before they’d made it more than two steps. “Pops said to stay here.”
“Or else we’ll get gross soup,” Mikey piped up. “Instead of really good soup, like creamy chicken chili. Or minestrone!”
“Angie, it’s too hot outside for soup,” Leo said patiently, verbally dodge-rolling Raph’s question by humoring Mikey. “If we ordered a bunch of soup the delivery person would cry. You don’t want taco salad in a tortilla bowl? Or an Italian hero with extra pickled cherry peppers?”
Reminded of the whole wide world of food delivery possibilities, Mikey started rattling off all of his favorite meals without pausing for inconsequential things like air. Raph sighed, because it instantly became twenty times harder to agree on supper. Leo beamed up at him, like he didn’t just do that on purpose.
Donnie knew an opening when he saw one and slipped out of the dojo first, following the sound of Splinter’s voice to the front of the lair. 
“...haven’t told him you were coming. I did not want to give him a reason to be anxious all day,” Papa was saying, sounding anxious himself. “He’s so prone to worry, it just eats him up. I thought once you arrived, I would go back in and let him know you were here, and we’d—get it rolling fast, get him all swept up, so he didn’t have a chance to be afraid.”
“Dad knows best,” an unfamiliar voice said kindly. 
It made Donnie’s spine go straight, all of his attention sharpening to a point at this sudden proof of a stranger in his home talking about his twin. He inched forward on silent feet to peer around the corner. 
A big creature stood with Splinter, a few inches taller than him and covered from nose to tail in large overlapping scales. She had a curved spine that created a hunched-forward posture and a long narrow head similar to an anteater’s. With the big tote bag hanging off her arm and the green sundress she was wearing, she looked like an animal librarian straight out of one of Mikey’s chapter books. 
She didn’t seem dangerous. But Donatello watched her with narrowed eyes and wished he hadn’t left his bo behind in the dojo. 
“As for moving,” Splinter was saying, “I am still uncertain. My boys would be able to—to go to school, and make friends, and play in the sun. That would mean the world to me. But the house in Neo Edo needs a lot of work, and the Hidden Cities are dangerous, too. For a multitude of reasons.” 
“And you have family here in New York, as well,” the stranger said, her tone understanding. “It is a lot to consider. You haven’t brought up the possibility to the children yet?”
“I haven’t. Blue’s life has been in upheaval enough as it is. I wanted him to have more of a chance to get settled. Besides, it is not a decision that needs to be made right away. We can discuss it as a family and decide together.”
“Of course, Hamato-san,” the stranger said warmly. “These follow-up assessments are mandatory, and, I’ll admit, an excuse for me to visit with my little ones again. But there isn’t a doubt in my mind that you’re doing right by him.” 
Donnie let go of his suspicion just long enough to wonder about the possibility of moving away from New York City. He wouldn’t want to be apart from April and Aunt June for any extra amount of time. But it sounded like he would be able to go to school in that Neo Edo place and he would like that a lot. 
“Here I am,” Leo’s voice said in a whisper as he stepped up beside Donnie. He was holding his bokken across his shoulder, probably because he wouldn’t have had a chance to store it properly and come listen in on Papa’s conversation without Raphie catching him again. “What’d I miss?”
But he was already looking around the corner for himself, and that smiling expression he was wearing changed in a heartbeat to something pale and shocked. His arms fell to his sides. 
“Miss Toto? Why is she here?”
His voice was too loud. Both adults glanced over at where Donnie and Leo were standing, and Donnie felt caught. But Leo took a couple quick steps closer, dragging his sword behind him like he didn’t care at all that the shiny finish might get scuffed on the concrete. 
Papa looked pale himself somehow. “Blue—”
“Am I going back?” Leo said, getting louder. “Are you giving me back? Why? What did I do?”
“You didn’t do anything,” the stranger said, hands clutched tight in front of her chest. Her eyes were wide. “It’s okay, sweetheart.” 
“No, you said!” Leo shouted at Splinter. “You said, you said you wouldn’t, you said I could stay, you said I was good! I was good, I was! I did everything I’m supposed to!” 
“Baby, I would never send you away, ” Splinter said, arms open to scoop him up, but Leo stumbled backwards out of reach. Leo couldn’t hear him or anybody else, heaving in frantic gulping breaths. 
The sword in his hand started to glow, as if a light had turned on inside it and was shining through patterns carved up and down its length, even though the whole thing was solid wood and didn’t have any carvings a light could shine out of. The shine got brighter and bluer until Donnie had to squeeze his eyes closed against the glare. 
When he opened them again Leo was gone, but the light was left right where he’d been standing—a perfect circle cut out of thin air, the color of the sky in summertime. It was humming, the way things with an electrical charge hummed, and spinning as playfully as a pinwheel.
“Oh, my spirits,” Miss Toto breathed. 
“Did he just,” Splinter croaked out. 
Of course, Donnie thought, finally solving that big puzzle in the back of his mind.  
Donatello was the first of Leo’s siblings to notice the healed burns on his hands, if the others had noticed them at all. Faint discolorations, smoother than the rest of his textured skin. They didn’t seem to hurt anymore but Donnie worried about them anyway. 
He had gone straight to Splinter with his observations, hovering at the other side of the kitchen table waiting to be acknowledged; but Splinter had been too engrossed in the contents of a folder to notice the round eyes level with the tabletop staring unblinkingly at him, like a fox stalking a bird.
‘Papa,’ he said. Splinter jolted in his seat, slopping tea over the rim of his mug.  
‘Holy—Purple! You will give me a heart attack one day, and then who will feed you?’ He closed the folder and turned his chair, and Donnie trotted around to his side. ‘What’s up, buttercup?’
‘Leo burned his hands,’ Donnie said.  
Splinter’s face did something funny, and he asked quickly, ‘Did he hurt himself just now?’ 
‘No. They were there already. How?’ 
‘Ah. How did it happen?’ he clarified. Donnie nodded, and Splinter weighed his words for a moment before he said, ‘A few days before he came to live with us, the house where Blue took his kendo lessons caught on fire. But someone rescued him—plucked him and his friend right out of danger and left them safe in a basket of clean blankets. We are all very lucky.’ 
Donnie had shivered, and bonked his forehead against Splinter’s arm so his father knew to wrap him up in a tight hug until the shivering stopped. He didn’t want to think about Leo trapped in a fire, so instead he thought about the person who had rescued him. 
‘Who?’ he asked when he could manage it.
‘Who saved them? No one seems to know,’ Splinter said. ‘The boys only remembered a blue light.’ 
Leo saved himself, Donatello realized now. He always saved himself. It was the only thing that made sense. The proof was right in front of them, burning like a star in the living room. 
But now the edges of the circle were wobbling, and then compressing, the whole thing beginning to shrink. A door closing, with his twin on the other side. 
Donatello didn’t need to think about it. He heard a cut-off gasp from the scaly anteater, and Papa yelled “Purple!” but he was already running. He ducked his head to clear the top arc and hopped over the bottom, disappearing neatly through the blue seconds before it dwindled into nothing. 
In just one step, he had gone from the lair under New York to a big open countryside. He’d never seen so much greenery in his life. It was cooler here, and quieter—even with the rush of the river nearby, it was easily half the average decibel level of Manhattan. He could smell fish and sesame oil and salt, a hint of smoke, damp wood—town must have been behind him. Ahead of him, the footpath he was standing on winded away toward the water.
Donnie headed forward. There was a big house up the hill to his left and he could hear other children there. But the door hadn’t taken him to the house. It had led him here, trudging through mud and weeds along the bank, until he rounded the bend and found exactly who he was looking for. 
On the opposite shore, Leo was hiding under a rocky outcrop, where the stones of a towering cliffside formed a secret alcove. Sunken boulders in the water created a natural ford where Donnie could cross and he plunged right in. 
Leo must have heard him coming, but he stayed curled up small. He was crying so hard his face was red and his eyes were squeezed shut, which made Donnie’s eyes sting, too. He hated when his siblings cried. He hated not knowing how to fix it. One day he’d invent a solution for everything that hurt them.
Until then, he’d crawl into this muddy hole, and scratch his knees and palms on the rocks, and put his arms around his twin. It was the right thing to do because it was what Raphie and Mikey would do. It made Leo cry even harder, and that hurt Donnie’s heart more than anything else in his whole life ever had, but he just held on tight.  He’d be one of those stones that the river crashed against. Nothing would move him until he decided to move. 
When Leo quieted into hiccups and wet-sounding sniffles, Donnie thought it was safe enough to let go of him with one hand. He used the other to wipe Leo’s puffy face with the balled-up end of his purple sleeve. 
“Don’t leave again,” Donnie said. “You promised Mikey.”
“I don’t want to,” Leo choked out. “But they—” 
“That anteater wasn’t there to take you away,” Donnie told him matter-of-factly. “Otherwise Papa would have caused a scene. She was just there to visit. It sounds like we have a house around here somewhere, and Papa is thinking about moving. But he hasn’t decided yet. If we did move, you’d come, too.” 
Leo pulled back to stare at him, all dirty and wet and miserable. After a moment, he mumbled, “Miss Toto is a pangolin. Anteaters don’t have scales. You’re dumb.”
“You’re dumb,” Donnie replied, heart lifting like a balloon at Leo sounding more like Leo. “Papa will never let anyone take you away. You don’t have to be good all the time.” His twin’s eyes fell down to look at the muddy stones between them. He didn’t say anything, but Donnie could tell he didn’t believe it yet. So Donnie presented the facts: “Raph is bossy and acts like he’s right even when he’s wrong. Mikey never does what he’s supposed to and makes huge messes with his paints and cries when he gets in trouble. And I’m mean. And I bite. But Papa loves us, even when he says we make him want to tear his hair out. And he loves you.”
“How do you know?” Leo asked, like he’d like to be convinced, but he was still clutching at his old truths instead of this new one. 
“Because I know everything,” Donnie told him plainly. “I’m smarter than you and the older twin so you have to listen to me.” 
Leo made a quiet noise somewhere between crying and laughing. His eyes were gold like Donnie’s. Would that ever stop being amazing? Probably not. Here was Donnie’s other half, the most important part of his heart, back where he belonged. He really was dumb if he thought Donnie was ever going to lose him again.  
They walked hand in hand to the house on the hill, which turned out to be the orphanage where Leo used to live. A few of the kids in the yard gave them strange looks, but Leo didn’t stop to say hi to any of them, which told Donnie everything he needed to know. 
A boy with amphibian features stepped right in their way. He had big protruding eyes and webbed hands and a round, flat head. His mouth stretched from ear to ear when he opened it to call out, “Back already, Lucky?” 
It caused a twitch to pass through Leo’s whole body, not a flinch but not not a flinch, either. He smiled back automatically, and Donnie knew he was about to play along with whatever mean joke was being played on him, because Leo was smart and always knew what the quickest way out of a bad place was. 
But Donnie was smart, too. And he didn’t care about getting out as much as he cared about getting results.
He stopped in his tracks and twisted his head around on his neck in the way that always freaked April out. She said it made him look like an alien from a horror movie, so naturally Donnie practiced it in the mirror a bunch of times. 
He’d never had the chance to use it on anyone else until now. He was pleased with the way it made everyone in the yard stand really still. 
“You know turtles eat frogs, right?” Donnie said. “I heard they taste good with ginger and scallions.”
Heard from his baby brother who had an unhealthy obsession with the Food Network, anyway. 
The frog boy shut right up, his throat ballooning defensively—prey instinct to make himself a more difficult meal. 
“It was nice to see you guys,” Leo said brightly to the terrorized crowd of his former foster siblings, circling behind Donnie and pushing him bodily into the house. Once the door was closed behind them, he added, “They all think you’re an oni now! It was just a nickname, Tello.”
“Good,” Donnie said, smug. “And it’s not just a nickname if you hate it, Nardo.”
Leo took his hand again and led him down the hall. There was a landline phone in the matron’s office that they could use to call Papa. It seemed like a majority of the kids were out of the house, making the most of the sunny day, because they didn’t run into anyone else.
“It’s ‘cause I’m bad luck,” Leo said suddenly. “Turtles—you know, in the stories—they’re good. Since I kept coming back to the orphanage, the older kids started saying it’s ‘cause my luck got messed up. That’s why they call me that.”
“You’re not bad luck,” Donnie said, wishing he’d taken a good bite out of that frog kid after all. “You’re the luckiest thing that ever happened to me and Mikey and Raph and April and Papa and Aunt June. That’s a lot of luck for one turtle and you saved all of it for us. But if you don’t like that name I won’t let anyone call you that anymore.”
Leo hesitated long enough that Donnie knew he was about to do something very brave, like tell the truth, even though a lie would be safer. 
Sure enough, he said, “I don’t like it.” 
Donnie nodded. He’d make sure their brothers and sister knew, too.  
The door slammed open again behind them. Donnie turned around, ready to pick another fight with another stupid bully and maybe show off his sharp canines this time, but the kid who appeared in the hallway wasn’t one of the ones they’d passed by in the yard. 
It was a white rabbit with long ears tied in a topknot. He had a bokken strapped to his back, glossy black where Leo’s was cherry red, handle wrapped in gray cord instead of blue. The rabbit was completely out of breath, bracing himself with a hand against the wall while his shoulders heaved, and he stared straight at Donnie’s brother like Leo would disappear into thin air if he so much as blinked.
“I saw the blue light and ran all the way here,” he huffed. “Give me your hand.”
Donnie bristled at this stranger telling his twin what to do, but Leo’s face was pure sunshine. He shoved his hand out immediately and the rabbit took it, neither of them bothering with so much as a hello. Uncapping a marker with his teeth, the rabbit scrawled something on the inside of Leo’s palm. 
“This is my new phone number,” he said, not letting go of Leo’s hand even when he was done writing and the marker was put away. “When you didn’t call at our usual time,  Auntie asked if you even knew her number, and I realized you only had the number for our house that burned down. And when I called here, Miss Toto said I’d just missed you. And Suzy said you got adopted for real and went to live in New York and weren’t coming back.” 
His eyes were big and wet and his mouth was wobbling, but he stubbornly wasn’t crying. From this close, Donnie could see the charm dangling from the guard of his wooden sword—a little blue turtle. 
“Don’t ever disappear again, Stripes,” the rabbit said. “We promised to stick together forever.”
“Forever, Snowy,” Leo told him, in his voice that meant he meant it. “I always come back.”
It wasn’t until Donatello and the rabbit were sitting in the den, watching two tiny sheep yokai kill each other for their turn on an ancient Nintendo 64 while Leo used the corded landline in the office, that introductions were made. 
“Who are you?” Donnie demanded bluntly. He’d heard enough about ‘Snowy’ that he could probably write the guy’s biography if he had to, but somehow Leo had never mentioned his best friend’s actual name. 
“Usagi Yuichi,” the rabbit replied. He hesitated, sizing Donatello up, then asked, “Are you his family? His actual one?”
“I’m his twin,” Donnie said, feeling prickly and overprotective. He’d only had Leo for thirty-two days and he would defend his spot in Leo’s life with violence if the situation called for it. “He has a big brother and a little brother at home, too. He doesn’t need any more than that.” So there, he thought. 
To his credit, Yuichi got the gist of Donnie’s bottom line quickly. Instead of any of the reactions Donnie was waiting for, Yuichi wrinkled his nose.
“Yuck, I don’t want to be his brother. I’m going to marry him someday.”
Donnie considered that carefully, and decided it was acceptable. They shook on it then quickly jumped apart when Leo wandered back into the room. He collapsed on the sofa between them with a gusty sigh.  
“I think we’re grounded,” he said. “But everyone was shouting too much for me to be sure. They’re coming to get us now. Splinter said stay in this exact spot and wait for him or he’ll have a conniption. What’s a conniption?”
“It means he’ll cry a lot,” Donnie replied. 
“I don’t know how to get to New York,�� Yuichi piped up, frowning. “Nee-chan says it’s really big, too. How am I supposed to visit?”
Leo slid his bokken from his belt and laid it across his lap. There wasn’t a single etching or carving on it anywhere, the glossy lacquered finish completely unbroken. If Donnie hadn’t seen those strange glowing runes for himself earlier, he’d have a hard time believing in them now. 
“When I really need to go somewhere, a door opens,” Leo said. “It happened when your house burned up, Snow. We were trapped inside but I got us out. I’ve never done it on purpose before but I think I could. Maybe.”
“Not by yourself,” Donnie said immediately. He didn’t want Leo to get the wrong idea that his family would let him go traipsing off through magic windows all alone. “Or Papa really will have a conniption.”
Leo smiled down at his hands, that crooked, happy smile. He didn’t say anything, which Donnie knew meant he still didn’t believe it all the way yet, but he would someday. He was too smart not to. 
When Splinter arrived nearly two hours later, Donnie didn’t notice him at first. He and Leo were busy conducting experiments, since they had a magical sword on hand and some time to kill. They had collected a bit of a crowd at that point, Leo’s actual friends clustered around him—including a tiny otter who made it abundantly clear why Leo was a professional Mikey-wrangler within seconds of meeting the kid—as he tried to make his bokken glow again. 
“It’s not gonna work,” Niji said with absolute authority. Her scales were teal for now and she kept hitting Leo’s foot with her tail to be annoying on purpose. “Or it would’ve worked already.”
“Google how many tries it took to invent the lightbulb and get back to me,” Donnie replied without looking up, scribbling notes on the back of an algebra worksheet he stole from a bookbag lying on the floor nearby. The lizard girl hissed at him and he hissed right back. 
“Your brother’s mean,” the tiny otter dangling over Leo’s shoulders said with obvious delight. “He made Midori cry.” 
Midori was, of course, the frog yokai that Donnie had threatened to eat. Word got around quickly it seemed—half the room was keeping a healthy distance from the turtles. Donnie tried not to look smug about it, but he didn’t try very hard. 
“He’s nice to me,” Leo said, squinting in concentration. “I think he only makes bullies cry.”
“Doesn’t Midori make fun of you, Renren?” Yuichi asked, poking the otter’s diamond-shaped nose. 
“Yup!” Ren wriggled happily, getting in everyone’s way, obnoxious and noisy and loved for it. “That’s why Koko’s brother is mean and cool. Next time Midori tries to call me a name, I’ll show him the picture Suzy took of his face all puffed up like a balloon!”
“I shouldn’t encourage this,” the Suzy in question, a fluffy owl named Susumu, said primly. “But Midori is such a jerk. I made like twenty copies of the photo in case Miss Toto finds out.” 
“Then I expect to find twenty copies on my desk before bedtime, young lady,” Miss Toto announced firmly, and a ripple of chaos spread through the room as a dozen kids realized their guardian had come home without warning. Even some of the ones who weren’t actually doing something wrong scattered with the ones who should have been working on chores or homework. 
That’s when Donnie realized Splinter was standing in the doorway, looking like he’d just been watching over them for a little while. 
He waved and said, “Hi, Papa. I found Leo.” 
“Don’t you wave at me,” Splinter snapped. “You are in so much trouble, mister. Jumping face-first into a portal! Who raised you?”
“Is that a trick question? I don’t like those.”
Leo shrugged Ren off his shoulders and stood up fast, shoving both his sword and the otter into Yuichi’s arms. When he faced Splinter, he looked like he wanted to hide inside his shell and live there forever, but he only hunched his shoulders and tucked his chin instead. 
“It was my fault,” he managed to say. “I yelled at you and ran away and I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I won’t ever do it again. I’ll be—” 
But by then, Splinter had crossed the room in a few swift strides, and scooped Leo up into his arms the way he’d wanted to back in the lair, and Leo was too startled to speak.
“You can’t just disappear like that, Blue!” Splinter chided fiercely. “Red and Orange are frantic, June keeps forgetting herself and trying to call the police, April just about stormed the Hidden Cities on her own, and I was ready to sell my soul to the nearest witch for another finding spell! It is a whole mess back home!” 
He rubbed his furry cheek on the top of Leo’s head and closed his eyes. It was the closest Donatello had ever seen his father get to tears and it made him feel uneasy. Donnie shoved his notes into Yuichi’s already-full hands and scrambled over to tug at the front of Splinter’s jacket. He was lifted up immediately and Splinter held them both. 
“You are my precious treasures, and I had no idea where you were. Do you have any idea how frightened I was?” Splinter said. 
Donnie watched Leo’s face wobble and scrunch up miserably as he struggled not to cry again. His twin was the only person he’d ever met as stubborn as him.  
“Sorry,” Leo mumbled, “sorry, I’m sorry.” 
Papa’s next breath shuddered out of him. He squeezed them extra tight, and kissed each of their foreheads, and then said, “It’s okay. It’s okay now. We are all going to go home, and have a long talk after this, but it is okay .” He looked right at Leo until Leo nodded slowly. Then he added, “But you’re both grounded until you’re at least thirty! You are never leaving my sight again! If you think I’m joking, you have another thing coming!” 
It was his silly-scolding voice, and it soothed the last of Donnie’s worries. Leo’s worries weren’t gotten rid of so easily, but somehow he managed to have more hope inside him than fear. 
So he was brave enough to lay his head on Splinter’s shoulder and say, “Okay, Papa.” 
That surprised Papa so much he nearly fell over. The tiny yokai children in his path squawked in alarm, and Donatello laughed because the suddenness of the almost-fall made his stomach swoop. 
A moment later, just a second behind, Leonardo laughed, too. 
——
When Leonardo was fourteen years old, he split his time between the yokai world and the human world almost evenly. 
Neo Edo was where their ancestral house was and where they went to school. It was where they had nosey neighbors and block parties and parents night at the junior high, where people recognized Leonardo and his brothers at a glance and collectively referred to them as ‘Yoshi’s boys’.
But there was a part of Leonardo’s heart that belonged to New York City. His portals to the lair always opened up easily, even eagerly, giving the truth of the thing away to anyone who knew what to look for. 
It was home. The first one Leonardo had ever had that he could believe was his to keep. 
“Blue,” Splinter called from the doorway of the living room, pausing on his way through to the kitchen, “what are you doing?” 
Leo, more out of boredom than anything else, was poking Raph in the face while he tried valiantly to read the last chapter of his book, and then looking innocently away every time his big brother leveled a glare at him. 
“Nothing, daddy,” Leo called back in his sweetest voice.
“Orange, what is Blue doing?” Splinter tried next. 
“Invoking the Cain Instinct,” Mikey answered without lifting his eyes from his canvas, three days in on his latest painting and fully in that headspace where time and space didn’t exist and he would only eat if someone physically put a sandwich or something in his free hand. That didn’t stop him from knowing exactly what his brothers were up to at any given point.  
“For what purpose?” Splinter asked.
“Dee went to pick up April from work and the twins are like ninety percent of each other’s impulse control,” Mikey said. “Also Lee is just like that as a person.” 
“That’s true,” Splinter conceded, and stayed to watch the show.  
When Raph finally slammed his book down it was Leo’s cue to gleefully scramble to his feet and run for his life. He shrieked with laughter when he was caught and scooped right off the floor in seconds. 
Raph’s act of revenge was aggressively nuzzling the top of Leo’s head with his cheek, rumbling playful turtle sounds at him that wouldn’t have convinced a single living person that he was actually angry.  
Leo could have hidden in his shell if he wanted to—and no one would yell at him for it, or threaten to crack it open to get him back out, or do anything more than carry it as carefully as they carried Mikey’s until they found a comfy place to put it down—but he didn’t want to. 
Ever since he was a little kid who first crawled under his big brother’s blanket after a nightmare, who first learned to skate while holding onto his big brother’s hands, he knew where he was safe. 
“Is that the sound of Nardo making someone’s life more difficult than it needs to be?” Donnie’s voice rolled drolly from the entrance of the lair. “Note my tone of utter disbelief.”
Leo squirmed around in Raph’s arms until he could free one hand and make a grabby motion toward the sound of his twin. Even if he couldn’t see him, he could smell him, and Donnie had definitely come home with Starbucks. 
“I’m rolling my eyes,” Donnie said, but he crossed the room and put an iced coffee in Leo’s waiting hand anyway. 
“Boys, I got the keys to the roof!” April hollered from the turnstiles. “It’s go-time, baby!”
“What roof?” Splinter asked suspiciously. 
“One that I’m definitely allowed to be at and have keys for,” his honorary daughter replied, lifting her chin. Not even the FBI would be able to crack her. 
Raph set Leo on his feet, then swiped his cup away and took an annoying slurp before Leo managed to snatch it back. 
“You don’t even like coffee!” he complained. 
“Big brother tax,” Raph replied unrepentantly, making his way over to begin the perilous undertaking of extracting Mikey from his creative process without losing a finger. 
“Try not to end up on the news,” Splinter said, knowing when to pick his battles. “April, you are in charge. Red, you are also in charge. Blue, you are in charge in a third and different way.” 
“Can I be in charge of Donnie?” Mikey asked, raising a paint-smeared hand.
“Of course you can, Orange,” their dad said. 
“I’m running away,” Donnie announced to the lair as a whole. 
The familiar noise washed over Leo like sunshine. He totally understood why regular turtles could bask in that stuff for hours. He sipped his latte and drew a gleaming silver katana from over his shoulder, an ancient bunny charm dangling from its bright blue guard. 
Leo smiled up at Splinter as he passed him in the doorway, never missing an opportunity to duck in for a hug. His dad always tucked him under his chin and held him tight, as if he was still that little eight-year-old boy terrified to death of being abandoned. 
“Have fun, my Baby Blue,” Splinter said. “And if you don’t come home with a cheesecake for your poor father, don’t bother coming home at all.” 
Leo snorted and started to laugh, and by then Mikey had had enough lingering around, whining at the top of his lungs, “Come on, Lee, let’s go already! It’s Cannonball Day!”
“Yeah, Fearless, lead the way,” Raph rumbled fondly.
Donnie stood there watching him with steady gold eyes exactly like his own, and said, “We’re all waiting for you.”
Leo grew up in an orphanage, an unwanted bad omen, and now he had two houses and two hometowns. He was one of four brothers and he loved them with a conviction that he hadn’t known existed outside of storybooks when he was a child. He had a shortcut home from anywhere and a family who would fight god to keep him. 
Hamato Leonardo—who was called Koko by his old friends, and Stripes by his best friend, and would always be Blue to his dad—was a very lucky turtle. 
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mi-i-zori · 15 hours ago
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A Tiny World - 2
CoD - 141 x Snail (OC/Fem!Reader)
SYNOPSIS : Stardew Valley time with Snail, Gaz and Price.
Warnings : None. But please read the Author’s Note below.
Author’s Note : Snail is an OC that can be read as a Fem!Reader - I do my best no to describe her too much, but may sometimes say that she’s small (height) and has long hair.
I do not give anyone permission to re-publish and/or translate my work, be it here or on any other platform, including AI.
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Aside from Animal Crossing, Snail really likes playing Stardew Valley.
Actually, scratch that. She loves it.
She bought the guide to make sure her farm is as efficient as possible. She planned it all thoroughly, from the kind she chose at the very beginning, to the animals and crops she wanted the have, where she would put them, and so on.
She’s got a part of her land fully dedicated to mystic trees associated with mushroom logs, because it wouldn’t be her farm if she didn’t make a gargantuan amount of profit based on them mushies.
The chickens, ducks and dinosaurs are all on one side of the road situated at the bottom of her farm, while the cows, goats and pigs are on the other side. All the tools she needs to make cheese, mayonnaise and dried resources are placed right next to each other, not far from the ponds. All the products she makes are close to a selling box, so she can sell everything right after collecting it.
She’s working really hard to offer tons of void mayonnaise to Kroby so she can ask them to be her roommate. For now, she’s got a cat named Mochi that’s always sleeping on her bed and proudly wears a green top hat she got on St Patrick’ Day.
Believe it or not, Price loves to watch her play. The whole setting of the game reminds him of the time he used to spend at his grandparent’s farm in the English countryside, all those years ago. He remembers helping them with all kind of crops and animals, and running across their land and the nearby village with other children his age. Good, simpler times.
He also has to admit that the way she organises her findings in the museum by colours is extremely satisfying to watch. And seeing her get all excited when she finally finds something new to add to her collection is also pretty endearing.
She also got Gaz to play too !
They help each other out with their farm - they’ve become pros at it, at this point. Both their greenhouses are filled to the brim with ancient fruits, which immediately go into an army of kegs to be brewed into wine. They make plans on how to deals with the upcoming seasons together.
They also switch consoles to help each other with the tasks they like the least. Snail isn’t really fond of going into the mines - she’d rather enjoy the rainy days and go fish and forage all around the game. Kyle, however, enjoys doing challenges into the mine more that running around trying to look for resources. So they efficiently help each other to level up and fill the chests on their farms with everything they need, sprawled on top of each other on their beds in a comfortable silence.
They rule over every single event in the game.
And they absolutely love gossiping about the characters - to the point that other soldiers on base think they’re actually saying mad shit about real people.
They don’t bother correcting them. Their confused faces as they realise they’ve been talking about marrying or divorcing three people in the same week make it all worth it.
It gets a good chuckle out of the team.
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superiorsturgeon · 5 months ago
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out of curiosity, why do you like sturgeons so much?
A chance to info dump about my favorite fish…?!
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I grew up in the Great Lakes area of North America, where fishing is pretty popular but everyone knows that fish populations aren’t anything like “the good old days” when people took out huge numbers of fish while messing up their spawning sites. I got pretty into fishing when I found out that I could catch bluegill in the surrounding farm ponds, and once in a while my family took me to an isolated fishing cabin for vacation, but for years I never encountered a wild fish bigger than a kilogram or two.
BUT THEN…
I found out about sturgeon! They were HUGE fish that had once lived in the rivers and lakes all around my home, and better yet, fish almost exactly like modern sturgeon had existed all the way back in the Cretaceous period alongside the dinosaurs, and they STILL EXIST TODAY!!! The fact that small numbers of these huge dinosaur fish still existed made them seem almost like a real-life lake monster/cryptid, except that we had proof of their existence!
Furthermore, there’s just nothing else like them. Sturgeon get big. Like, REALLY big. The record for the largest sturgeon was almost 11 meters/24 feet long, which is colossal for freshwater animals. They have armor plates of bone running down their sides, and at the same time they don’t have bony skeletons. They also have a crazy mouth structure, which allows them to actually pop their jaws out like a tube and suck up food. And on top of all of this, the adults are absolute tanks. I’ve seen skin nearly 8mm thick, and it’s so tough that people make leather out of it, and they occasionally lose fins or even entire gill plates and just keep on swimming! (I found out about that last one when I tried to wrestle a big female out of a river and my hand went straight into her gills. She didn’t seem that bothered by it!)
For a long time I filed sturgeon along with Alligator Gar, Giant Mekong catfish, and Yangtze paddlefish as a semi-legendary fish that may still exist, but I was never going to see except possibly in an aquarium, until I enrolled in graduate school. For those unfamiliar with grad school in the US, it typically involves both high-level classes as well as an independent research project the student designs and carries out with help from an experienced professor. When my mentor asked what kind of thing I wanted to study, I tossed out “sturgeon” as one such possibility, expecting to hear that I would probably have to limit myself to more common/accessible species.
I was blown away when she said “Actually, I think I know a guy…”
For the next several years, I got to ride along collecting wild adult sturgeon, gathering eggs, and raising the baby fish in a lab and in a hatchery. I was holding something that I had thought of as a semi-mythical lake/river monster in my own hands! I got to see a river choked with giants as big as 2 meters long, and I got to hold a 5-centimeters mottled baby whose armored scutes were still sharp and possessed the little arrowhead shape and big black pectoral fins that remind me of Mickey Mouse ears! In the video below you can even see a little heartbeat! (Don’t worry, this little guy was returned to the tank soon after to recover from his anesthesia!)
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Sadly, I didn’t find anything super groundbreaking in my research, but my experience DID land me a job working in sturgeon aquaculture! If you’ve ever had caviar that wasn’t poached, it probably came from a sturgeon farm, and if you want to see a lot of big fish up close, this is a good place to do it! I probably personally handled more individual sturgeon than there are wild fish in several sturgeon species. In addition, while the wild broodstock I mentioned above might reach 2 meters and over 50kg, the sturgeon I dealt with at the farm would easily double that, and there were a LOT of them! I got to see sturgeon behavior that had never been recorded in field guides, and even a few crazy one-in-a-million mutations like the infamous “ghost” sturgeon!
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I even got the opportunity to cook my own sturgeon meat (Yeah, I basically turned into the Touden siblings from Dungeon Meshi except for sturgeon instead of RPG monsters). I got pretty good at making smoked sturgeon, but the meat is also good on the grill or baked, and people have been cooking them in various ways for centuries.
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My favorite part of the job was physically wrestling the big fish! Sturgeon are easier to grab than other fish with the right know-how, but a human-sized fish often has its own plans for the day and won’t always cooperate. I was pretty good at moving the adults by the time I left that job, but it was still a wild rodeo every time!
Even more exciting was how we spawned each new generation of sturgeon. In the wild, they form massive spawning runs in big rivers that in the past would be enough to tip small boats, but in a lab or farm we have to use other means. I’ll spare you the details, but I am one of a small number of people who have surgically extracted eggs from a live sturgeon and sutured them back up to swim another day.
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The tldr of this essay is that sturgeon are a big, crazy-unique fish that have been around a long time, and I’ve spent a lot of my career handling and working with them. There’s just nothing like them for a fish nerd and they’re damn cool!
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(Clip art not mine, I think @sturgeonposting drew or shared it!)
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m1sa-w1sa · 6 months ago
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Animal Party!
The harbingers finding out you had a pet
(Some of the animals are tigers lions bears sharks etc etc, characters might be a bit OOC cuz this is kinda a crackfic but if yall want more srs ones lmk)
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Tartaglia
For him Lets say you had a pet bear it would go kinda like this, since you and him live in a big house you wanted a big backyard, he never knew why but he Never said no, his siblings could run around there so when he came home from work you were not anywhere to be found.. until he heard you call someone a “goodboy” from the backyard, his bow was already drawn as he would have a stern expression on his face until he saw you with a bear. “[NAME]…” “So i forgot to tell you…” “WHY DIDN’T YOU THEM ME SOONER?! HE’S SO CUTE!” overall tatamis loves the bear
Scaramouche
For Scaramouche you had a cat a fluffy white one, this time you went over to visit him with your cat just hanging out in her purse “Took you long enough-… What the fuck is that..” “Its [CATS NAME]…” I deeply feel like scaramouche would be jealous if the cat took to much of your attention but would warm up to the cat, not enough to not show at least a HINT of jealousy
Arlecchino
So You had a spider for this (if you dont like spiders then imagine something else) and again you went to visit her, Arlecchino actually does like spiders (or just insects in general based on voice lines) so wheb she sees one crawling on you she was surprised that you had one just hanging around, She doesn’t mind it and also gets close to the spider, Leney (idk if i spelt his name right) almost killed it becuase he thought it was creepy😞
Signora
You have a silly little snake!!! This can go either way you visit her, she visits you..OR she sees it slithering around and she calls you over “[NAME]! WHAT THE FUCK—“ “Signora! You found [SNAKE NAME]! Thank you!!” Signora would be surprised and confused..how can you live with that…THING?! Why is it built like that… Signora is ALRIGHT with your pet she isn’t to fond with it but would take care of it for you
Pantalone
You have a cat! Not the small one a BIG one so.. a lion for him you TOLD him you had a cat..just not what KIND of cat “Pantalone do you want to see my pet?” “Of course [NAME] it cant go that bad..” It went that bad, when he came to visit you and saw a whole ass LION he froze when did you get the beast?! “Ha..[NAME] you said you had a cat..” “I know! This is [LIONS NAME]!” “Why didnt you say that you had a lion?” “It was less fun..” hes alright its pretty tame, (might get a little jealous from all the attention the lions getting…)
Dottore
Simple way to put it, you have a shark said and done same with Pantalone you TOLD him just not that detailed in your words “Dottore you like fish right? You wana meet mine?” “Sure, I suppose it wouldn’t be that much of a hassle..” Well when he cane over he wondered why your house had a pool in the backyard, until he saw the fin sticking out of the water “See Dottore? This is [SHARK NAME]! “You said you had a fish” He doesn’t really care for it because he doesn’t go swimming often or study the oceans yet but he isn’t going to tell you to give it away
Columbina
You had a swan, a elegant animal it was plain and simple so there isn’t that much convincing that the animal WONT hurt them, You and Columbina have hang outs (aka dates..) by the pond, She only REALLY opens her eyes around you (she wears the mask so she wouldn’t fall in love with someone else again but your a exception) and saw that you had a swan with you she was like a kid in a candy shop in her eyes it was a perfect animal for someone as perfect as you! She loves your swan and has a good relationship with it
Sandrone
You had a hamster (a FAT one) it was just in your hands eating sunflower seeds (ofc it is..) as you were going to find your beloved Sandrone “[NAME] whats the dust in your hand for?” “Its my Hamster!” “What..” Sandrone is sarcastic so she does make jokes how its a fucking FATASS but she secretly thinks its cute and would do anything for that little fur-ball
Capitano
You have a fox! I feel like when he found out you didn’t know he was off today, so you were outside playing with your little fox friend while he looked at you, even if his face was covered he had a small soft smile who ever knew that his s/o could be so cute..but he doesn’t know much about taking care of animals so he loves hearing you talk about it and slowly warms up to your fox!^^
Peirro
Last but not least! You owned a monkey (or a spider monkey) but you and your monkey go EVERYWHERE together so its not hard for him to figure it out, since you two starting dating he was introduced to your monkey, he doesn’t mind that silly little fella he just wants to spend time with you and sometimes when your off doing errands or something else, your monkey just hangs out with Peirro, one time, Peirro had the monkey on his shoulders while in a fatui meeting (I feel like any of them would take your pet to a metting when there good with them, besides the shark… sadly)
(We are finished! I really hoped you enjoyed this!!^^ Tags: @jadestone2 )
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aphroditesmoon · 10 months ago
Note
Hi!! Same person who requested the Hades oneshot lol! I loved it alot and I know it's like super early to request another but I wanna get this out before I forget ^^. Okay so what about a Fem!Reader who is a mermaid or siren. Poseidons daughter, who is usually aggressive to anyone who enters her waters but Clarisse somehow is dating her, reader only has a soft spot for clarisse so when they need to cross her waters during capture the flag only clarisse can convince her ^^.(also reader often adopts random fish and clarisse is always swarmed with them when in her pond/waters.) Thank you!!
love letters from the sea to the shore
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clarisse la rue x fem!siren!reader
warnings: reader doesn't like demigods, possibly ooc clarisse.
wc: 2k
a/n: i hope u like this🩷🎀
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If there's one thing you hate more than demigods is their little capture the flag game. You view these half breeds as unresponsible, mischievous, and disrespectful beings.
You never saw the appeal in gods mingling with mortals and making children with them when they are so many other creatures they could be with.
Your father have tasked you into protecting the waters, and that is who you are. Lady of the lake, guardian of the sea.
The job isn't exactly glamorous, it have been more than a few time that you have caught some sneaky, filthy demigods canoodling in the waters, making out or doing worse.
Your ways into scaring them to leave have gotten less and less subtle as the years pass by and more aggressive. A few weeks ago, you had come close into strangling a kid from the Hermes cabin who had thrown his empty Snickers wrapper into the sea. You were deeply reprimanded by Chiron that same day.
You never see the boy near the waters anymore since that event.
But today...today is different. Every year, the demigods participate in the game of Capture the flag, and though every year they would try and use different routes and strategies, passing through the waters is always necessary. Which meant that whether you liked it or not, the demigods would pollute your waters anyways.
"I'm not going in." You could hear the kids argue among themselves. "Last time someone did, they got jumped by that thing."
"Mermaids don't jump, dumbass." His brother countered, only to be corrected by a familiar voice; "She's not a mermaid, she's a siren, and we don't have a choice."
Both of them were right. You would try and scare anyone who dares enter in, but you would let them in sooner or later. Even though you knew that rules must be abided.
"Move aside, I'll talk to her." Clarisse spoke again.
You weren't that close to land, but swam up nearer when you heard her approaching your territory. "Hey-hello?", she called out as her feet steps into the water.
"Lady...protector, I ask permission to speak to you." The daughter of Ares spoke as if she was unfamiliar with you, and either it was because her siblings were there or because she still considers the concept of your relationship a strange anonymity.
You knew who Clarisse was, you first met her 2 years ago. You wish you could say that she's different from the other obnoxious children, but she isn't.
The girl is as foolish as she is brave. She did not believe in other's warning to tread carefully around the waters, and so when you appeared despite her doubt that you would, she ran off in fear just like all the kids before her.
But a day after that, she came back.
She sat by the edge of dry land and waited for you to appear. And when you did, the same anxiety you've seen on many people's faces before was etched on hers.
But she did not run off that time, instead she gave you an apology, and a gift. A string bracelet made of tiny seashells. An offering, she called it. As if you were one of the gods.
You told her to stop collecting seashells, but thanked her for it anyway.
Since that day, she would come down ny the water more often, not too much that it'll annoy you, but enough times for you to grow a liking for her.
Some nights, when you're in a good mood, you'd even let her meet your sea creature friends. Not a lot of people manage to get close enough to not scare the fishes and crabs.
You are not in a good mood today.
Small waves were sent back up as a response to Clarisse, but it seemed that she needed more. "We need to cross the water." She informed, straight to the point.
She knew you wouldn't be answering her verbally, it isn't like you to appear in broad daylight. You kept the waves coming to indicate your presence and waited for her to speak again.
"Let us pass quickly, and we won't bother you for the whole year again." Clarisse attempted to bargain.
The truth was, she didn't need to ask you at all and you would've still let her pass. But she didn't know that and neither does her siblings, so you act as if you're still contemplating her deal. A few minutes later, the waves slowed down until they completely stopped, a finalised decision has been made.
"Is that a no?" Her brother asked. They couldn't read you like they could.
"Just get in the water." Clarisse instructed with an annoyed sighh as she lead the way, letting the waters surround her legs. That was another thing you had in common with her, you both agree that everyo e else in camp is insufferable.
You watched them waddle their way through from below, hidden from the side of the sea until eventually, they crossed over to dry land, getting closer and closer to the flag.
No one else tried to enter the waters again for the rest of the day. And 20 minutes after you had granted Clarisse safe passage, you could hear the cheers coming from the red coloured team.
---
As midnight approaches the hour, a rare sight comes into view around your space.
Fireflies dances above the large body of water, glowing over the places where the moonlight couldn't.
It's time like this where the most glorious parts of nature would come out of their hiding, the quiet is inviting. And the peace, comforting.
This has been your life since you could remember. And you were content with it. Despite your mother merely being a siren, your father acknowledged you and gave you responsibilities that he'd only give to people he trusted. The creatures of the water and the trees are your friends, a distraction for boredom and repetition.
And though you've had no problem repeating the same cycle of routine daily, you only knew what yearning meant after you met Clarisse La Rue.
Before her, you never knew what it felt like to wake up waiting on the best part of the day. You never knew what loneliness had meant up until you met her.
Only after Clarisse, did you realize empty and unfulfilling your life had really been. To be so good at what you're doing and yet, not having anyone who notices it or to care for you the way you've been caring for the sea and rivers.
But the thing with Clarisse is you never know when she's gonna come. It's impossible for her to visit you ever night, what with Chiron's guarding. And she had her own life apart from you.
Your infatuation with her soon lessened moderately when you realized just how ridiculous it is for you to assume that she views you as more than anything but a fascinating mythical creature, but your liking for her never truly leaves you.
You were not expecting her tonight, knowing full well how taxing and tiring their little game was. The children would all sleep like babies tonight.
And yet, from where you're sat, back leaning against a boulder, you hear her footsteps entering your grounds.
You tilt your head slightly, sneaking a glance at her before you turn back to your front, watching the fireflies disappear and the fishes lurking near your feet.
You felt her presence behind you and said nothing. It isn't uncommon for you to be silent around her, after all there is a risk of you accidentally affecting her with your voice.
You only turned to her when she knelt down to your left. Her face is shadowed by the darkness, without the fireflies, it was harder to see things.
"Hey." She greeted in a hushed tone. You stare at her quietly, responding to her in your mind. "I wanted to see you tonight, to thank you." Clarisse explained.
Her team had won, thanks to your cooperation. You offered her a small smile, something that is rare even between the two of you. Clarisse grinned back, encouraged by your positive attitude.
"I know how much you hate it when there's people over. You didn't have to let us cross, but you did."
You did have to let her cross, there are rules even you had to follow. But she didn't need to know that. Plus, if it were anyone else, you would've made it harder for them to cross.
The tiny goldfishes are surrounding your lower half that's still soaked inside the water, as if guiding you back under, you ignore them as your eyes remain on Clarisse. She looked beautiful like this, with her hair down and sleepy eyes that only you have the privilege to see before the sun rises.
She was pulling something out of her pocket suddenly and fixing her sitting position."I also got you something, a gift."
You had expected this. Clarisse often came to you with little gifts. Flowers, shiny rocks, dead butterflies.
Her hands are wrapped around the item strategically to hide it from you. If she was trying to get you excited, it's working. You push your neck out to try and get a peak on it, but it's gripped closely.
Clarisse pushes her hands outband slowly opened up her palms to you, exposing a circular bracelet, covered in a bright yellow colour.
"Gold." You noted aloud and looked up at her. "It is. Do you like it?" She asks, smiling.
You nod your head once and extend your wrist to her.
Clarisse easily puts it on over your hand, the size fitting perfectly. You wondered if this notion have somehow changed something in your relationship, but didn't know how to ask.
"I had someone from the Hephaestus cabin to make this for you. I wanted it to mean something...not just for you, but for me too." She had said it all so well, your heart skipped a beat over her words.
Clarisse probably didn't know, but for your species, gifting and offerings are usually considered as courting methods. And so you found it genuinely amusing how easy it is for her to be going around, getting you stuff unprompted.
You also had a gift for her. Something you've been keeping to yourself for months, contemplating on whether or not you should actually give it to her.
But it's been sitting down deep in the water, safely waiting to be retrieved.
And so without saying anything, you moved away from her and dived into the waters. You made sure to be quick, swiftly reaching for the closed shell into your palms.
And as you make your way back up onto the shores, you see that Clarisse is thankfully, still waiting.
Your fingers found hers as you tried to climb back up onto dry land. She does not hesitate to wrap her long arms under your elbow, pulling you up towards her.
Once you're seated next to her again, you nudged the shell onto her hand and waited for her to open it. Clarisse cracked open the pouch and opened her mouth to let out a soft breathy sigh at the sight of a singular white pearl that sat inside of it.
"Are you...giving this to me?" She asks, turning her head towards you. You nodded as a yes.
"You know, I think this would make a decent ring." She tells you, thumbing the stone. You raise your hand up to lightly graze over her collarbones. "You think I should make it a necklace?"
You nod again. Clarisse seemed pleased at how engaging you've been throughout this whole meeting, trying her best to coax a conversation out of you.
There are so many things you want to tell her of. Things you aren't ready to tell her yet. And so for now, whatever this is would have to be enough.
Clarisse shoves the pearl into her back pocket after. “Thank you.” She says gratefully. The silence was no longer excruciating nor suffocating. Instead it is loud in unsaid confessions and comfort in understanding.
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stargirlrchive · 2 years ago
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song chord ✩ jake sully
masterlist ⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
summary: jake sully x female!reader but no use of y/n, arranged marriage, sunshine!jake x grumpy!reader, kind of lmao. angst, jealousy, mentions of death, feelings of insecurities. fluff. <3 i think that is all, pls lmk if i missed anything 
word count: 5,112
tìyawn (n) - love
comments: first fic in a few months, first avatar fic ever <3 i really loved writing this, so i hope you all love it too, okay mwah mwah bye ⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
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You had not wanted your night to end like this, angrily picking at your song chord as your mother whispered to the elders of her desire to have you wed, and to the Olo’eyktan none the less. Every stone, every achievement, you had earned felt as though it was taken from you. Ripped from your fingers just as you were starting to enjoy the fruits of your labors.
Toruk Makto sat across from your mother, listening closely as the elders proposed the idea of uniting your family. Joining forces to strengthen the clan, providing security and faith to the people he led.
You had wished so much more for yourself, to have your accomplishments be only your own. Not tied to a man you would never be equal to. All your life you had fought to be perfect, to be an accomplished warrior and fight for your people. Your eyes welled with tears as your fingers ran across the newest bead on your song chord. An iridescent pearl that your father had picked for you, that you held so dearly and were waiting for the perfect culminating moment in your life to add to your chord. Your Iknimaya was given the grace of bearing the pearl.
Your mind swirled with the prospect of being wed, being mated to a man you knew very little about, a man you had only met in passing. As much as you tried to find a way to fix this you couldn't, it felt like your thoughts were running a millions miles a minute and getting no answer. It was very clear that you had no way to object, your family would be so disappointed and the fear that nestled into your chest far outweighed the fear of sacrificing your future, it was almost debilitating. Either way you ended up losing.
You roughly wiped at your eyes and tried to calm your breathing, quietly counting to ten as you willed yourself to object, to tell them your future was yours and no one else's. You had lost so much due to the war with the sky-people, you did not want to lose this too. The words were on the tip of your tongue but your eyes locked onto Jake’s and his fear was clear as day within his eyes. It comforted you, a bit. Knowing you were not the only one silently suffering, but he was the last person you wanted to find comfort in.
He cleared his throat and the room was silenced instantly, causing a lump to form at your throat. “Before I agree I would like us to speak, privately.”
You nodded as he stood, following after him outside of the tent. He walked outside of the camp, towards the dark forest that was only illuminated by the fluorescent lights of the plants and small insects native to the land. Normally you would question why he was leading you away from everyone, but it felt as though all the energy was taken from you.
Not too far into the forest there was a clearing, a small pond with glowing fish. He grunted quietly as he lowered himself to sit, dipping his feet into the pond as he sighed quietly. None of you said anything for a while, you had stayed standing by the trees and looking up into the sky. Silently praying to Eywa to give you the strength to fulfill your duty with an open mind, and even an open heart.
He turned to look at you, watching as your brows furrowed even more as a shooting star passed by, “Do you mind sitting with me?”
A small huff left your lips but you did as he asked, slowly approaching him and keeping a sizeable distance between the two of you, dipping your feet into the water just as he had. “I did not expect to be mated, the thought had never really crossed my mind.”
You kept quiet, trying to focus on his words as you fought the tears trying to fall from your eyes, he took your silence as a sign to keep speaking. “I know a lot of the Na’vi still blame me for what happened, I do too.” His throat tightened, gruff with guilt and unshed tears balling up, and for the second time tonight you found comfort that you were both suffering. “I am trying to be better, and I will prove to you everyday that I am no longer loyal to the sky-people. Believe me, the Clan’s best interest is my main priority and I would never again willingly do something to harm them.”
Silence.
“I know it is not ideal, having to marry a skxawng like me, but I would like to continue the engagement if you wish.”
You sighed quietly and tucked your knees in, resting your arms on them to lay your head gently, “I do not blame you.”
He nodded and averted his eyes to the pond, not believing your words, “I-I just did not picture my life to be this way. After my father died I tried so hard to accomplish everything he wanted for me, that is why it took me time to complete my Iknimaya, I wanted everything to be perfect.” His ears twitched as he listened to you.
“I just do not know if this is what he would have wanted for me.” Your last words were whispered quietly, almost as if you did not want him to hear.
“I fear everything I have ever accomplished will be stripped from me, and I will just be seen as Toruk Makto’s wife. Expected to be the next Tsahik and I can barely interpret the will of Eywa for myself, how am I expected to do so for the rest of the clan?”
He laughed loudly, as if what you said was the funniest thing in the world. As if your worries were comical and before you could stop yourself you hissed in his direction, making your way to stand up. “I’m sorry-wait I’m sorry-you made me laugh but I did not mean to offend you.”
You stopped yourself from leaving, “See what I mean? Skxawng.”
Your lips barely twitched at the end and you hoped he hadn’t caught it. He did.
“I am a warrior JakeSully, I will not sit back and watch the people fight. I will be front line.”
He smiled at your words, “I would also like to get to know you better, no wedding within the next two-three weeks, yes?”
He leaned back on his arms and looked up at the night sky, millions of tiny stars scattered all across you. “Ok, no wedding soon.”
He sent you a warm smile and it eased the gnawing feeling in your chest, “One final request, I wish to be seen as your equal, taken into consideration when it comes to decisions of the clan, not just your wife but your partner.”
His silence scared you, fearful of what would leave his mouth, “That is all I want.”
A small smile made its way onto your features, feeling far more content then how you expected this night to go.
You were both silent for a long time, just enjoying the beautiful forest of Pandora, “I must go, it is well past Eclipse and my mother will be worried.”
Jake nodded and stood up, leaning his arm forward to help you too. You both silently made your way through the short distance back to the camp, quickly making your way to your tent. You were about to go in, without sparing him another look but his hand reached for your forearm to stop you from walking, “We are in this together, from here on out it is you and me. I am not taking this lightly and-and I will be your friend through all of this.”
Your eyes welled with tears again, having to come to terms with your future in those few seconds as you looked up into his golden eyes. “Thank you, I will try my best too.”
You sent him a small smile before moving into your tent, hoping to sleep away the still overwhelming fear of having no control of your life.
-
You blinked the sleep away from the night before, trying to relax the nauseating feeling that nestled in your stomach as you recalled the events of last night. Why had you so willingly opened up to JakeSully, why?
You did not know him, and from the whispers that followed him around you were one of the few Na’vi women that did not want to. You had opened up some of your deepest concerns last night, and for the life of you, you didn’t know why. You soothingly rubbed the beads of your song chord, trying to ground yourself and push the tears down that seemed to flow like a never ending river.
Your ears twitched gently as you heard movement outside of your tent, “Who is there?”
Someone cleared their throat as you sat up, fixing your chest beads and loin cloth on your way to stand up. “It’s Jake, um-I wanted to spend some time with you. As friends do.”
You tsk’ed lowly, slowly making your way towards the opening of the tent, head peeking out only to be met with a gentle smile on the Toruk Makto’s face. You refrained from rolling your eyes at the tall man, going back into your tent but leaving it open so he could follow. “Give me a few minutes and I will be ready.”
He hummed quietly as he stepped in, eyes jumping from corner to corner of your tent. Curiously walking towards a make-shift shelf, filled from top to bottom with your trinkets. From your first arrow, to dried flowers and pretty stones you had collected since you were a child. You observed him, feeling your heart jump to your throat as he reached to pick something up. Feeling exposed to him in a way you couldn’t describe.
Your mind eased as he gently picked up the only picture you had on there, one that Grace had taken of your mother and father that she gifted you on a random day during her classes. “My condolences for your father, I never got to meet him.”
You said nothing as you continued to ready yourself, turning your back to him and making sure he was still occupied with the shelf before changing quickly, adjusting the straps on the cloth that fell on your hips as he turned towards you. “What will we be doing, JakeSully?”
His nose twitched softly at his full name.
“Is it your hunting or training day?”
You shook your head no, “Perfect, let’s go for a ride.”
Your eyes lit up softly, anytime you got to spend with your Ikran was so special to you, your sweet Pey’lal. Following behind him happily as he threaded through the forest where the claimed Ikran’s rested. Your tongue instinctively started clicking once you made it to the large tree, looking towards the sky for a large blur of purple and blue.
There was a large gust of wind and a powerful thud as Pey’lal landed gracefully in front of you, nuzzling her head against your cheek as you laughed happily. “My sweet girl, I have missed you.”
You cooed happily as she made happy clicking noises at the attention you were giving her, Jake clearing his throat made you snap out of your happy bubble. Pey’lal looked up as if just noticing him for the first time, moving her head to the side in question, flapping her wings as a warning sign. Your hand reached out to soothe her, letting her know to stand down. She relaxed instantly. “This is Pey’lal, my Ikran. Isn’t she beautiful?”
Your smile reached your eyes for the first time and Jake nodded, “This is Bob.” He patted his Ikran’s head who huffed in slight annoyance and it caused a laugh to ripple from your throat, “Bob?”
Jake’s face flared as his ears twitched, “I think it fits him, he is quite goofy.”
“If you say so, JakeSully.”
There was a beat of silence before you connected your queue to Pey’lal’s, jumping smoothly onto her back, “Well, let’s get to flying.”
In the next instant you were off, looking back momentarily only to see Jake jumping onto his Ikran to catch up.
-
It had been several weeks since Jake had taken you out to fly, or out on a date as he called it. But ever since then it was as if he was glued to your hip, accompanying you even when it was not necessary. Like when you went to pick fruit or went hunting, Pey’lal was even growing accustomed to him being around. Just yesterday she nuzzled her head against his chest as he called out for Bob, something she had only ever done with you.
You had tried to be annoyed with him, wanting to keep him as far away from you as possible but he had slowly, very slowly, started to crack the walls you had built up and began staking claim.
Like even now, as he sat across from you and smiled at your annoyance towards him, your tail swishing in frustration. “You are Olo'eyktan and cannot even pronounce basic words.”
You tsk’ed quietly as he leaned back on his arms, not focusing on what you were saying. He laughed deeply, one that you could tell started in his chest, “I cannot focus today.”
“You can never focus.”
“You are distracting me.”
Your brows furrowed together, confusion evident on your face. Another laugh left his throat, “I do not like being laughed at, JakeSully.”
“I am not laughing at you.” It continued, the sound warming your chest as you feigned being offended, purposely dropping your ears, “I just think you are so-so-interesting.”
You huffed and moved away from him, “You really know how to woo me.”
His face dropped and you bit back the smile that threatened to crack across your face, tucking your tail away as he scooted closer to you, “I meant that in a good way-I did not want to offend you.”
You turned your face to him, the laugh escaped you as soon as your eyes locked onto his, face full of concern, “I was only kidding you Skxawng. I think you are interesting too.”
He pushed your shoulder with his own, smiling so hard his cheeks felt sore.
A comfortable silence settled between the two of you, and in the next instant it hit you just how close he was, the side of his thigh pressed against yours and you flushed deeply. Ears twitching as you tried to stop your body from going rigid against his.
Jake's finger twitched softly as he contemplated reaching for your hand, he wouldn’t put it past you to flick him with your tail if he tried to, but even still he wanted to know how your hands would feel against his.
Your face was turned away from him, clearly trying not to face him and he swore you knew what he was up to, your fingers twitched softly as it rested on your leg. Before he could think about it too much he slipped his hand under your own, tangling his fingers with yours and closing, rubbing gently along your knuckles.
Your hand had tensed as he held it, still avoiding his gaze and he almost retracted but slowly your fingers relaxed into his, his tail swished softly in excitement as you folded your fingers to hold his hand.
“Your hands are sweaty, Toruk Makto.”
He refrained from laughing, “Yeah well-you make me nervous. One wrong move and I know it will earn me a tail flick to the head.”
You laughed at his words and turned to him, cheeks still blazing as he got a good look at you. Your cheeks were a soft purple and a smile that reached all the way to your eyes.
“Do not tempt me.”
Your tail gently flicked against his arm and he felt a warm sensation start in his belly and make its way up to his chest, causing goosebumps to rise all across his arms.
After a beat of silence he began speaking again, “So, how do you say it? Kalultal?”
“No-no! Kelutral!”
-
The weeks had started to bleed into each other the more time you spent with Jake. Your eyes instinctively looked through the sea of Na’vi as you searched for him, a proud smile on your face as you lugged around the Hexapede you had hunted not too long ago.
You had noticed him a couple of feet away, his back towards you and there was an instant smile that made its way to your face, trying to get to him faster. Your eyes were taking in his back, a small heat rising to your cheeks as you let your stare run across his shoulders and down to his arms.
You opened your mouth to call out for him but you clamped up almost instantly, ears twitching in question as his head was thrown back and a loud laugh left his lips. Your eyes finally shifted to who was in front of him and felt a sting begin to settle in your stomach. It was Neytiri.
They were talking animatedly between each other, laughing and you were not sure why it left such a bitter taste in your mouth. Cheeks now flushed but for an entirely different reason, anger bubbled in your chest. You tried to wrack your brain for what it could be, you had always gotten along with Neytiri so why had you started to feel a sense of insecurity in yourself as you noticed how easy it was for them to get along? How easy it had been for them since the beginning.
The realization scared you even more so when you came to the conclusion that it was jealousy, you had started to feel some sort of claim to the Toruk Makto and it hurt. You felt so stupid, how could you think he wanted you when Neytiri had been a part of his life from the moment he was introduced to the clan? She had shown him the in’s and out’s, he had fallen in love with your people, with your home, through her.
You felt a lump rise to your throat as you handed off the Hexapede to be skinned for the feast later in the evening, rushing past the crowd of people behind you. You wanted to be far away from him, from her, from everyone. Your ears had turned inward and all you could hear was the beating of your heart. It came in loud thuds, deep and sorrowful.
You had made it towards your tent, not noticing that Jake had clocked you dropping the animal off. He had called you several times which you had not heard. He had noticed how your shoulders were tensed, a look so unfamiliar to him on your face and he knew something was wrong. His fingers tangled around your forearm before you slipped into your tent, you jolted back against his chest showing him just how distracted you were.
Jake called your name softly and his brows furrowed together as you refused to look at him. “Is everything alright?”
You hissed in his direction and yanked your forearm from his grip, Jake stepped back in astonishment as he took in the anger swirling in your eyes. “Leave me alone, JakeSully.”
“Woah-what? Did I-what’s wrong?”
You ignored him and walked into your tent, pacing the perimeters as you tried to keep the emotions from erupting into something uglier. You felt like an open wound and hated that it was caused by the man who only a few months ago you wanted nothing to do with. Your tent was opened as Jake stepped in, confusion evident in his face.
Your angry haze landed on him, his hands up in surrender trying to not overwhelm you as he neared you, “I do not want you near me, Toruk Makto. Just go!”
“I am just trying to figure out what’s wrong, yeah? Let me help.”
“You are the last person I would want help from, get out!”
Your hands had reached up to push at his chest and even Jake knew you were going easy on him, but the pushes were persistent. The frustration more evident each time your palms landed on his chest.
His hands reached out to grab at your wrist, the beads of your song chord digging gently into your skin. Your wrist felt like they were on fire at his touch and felt the anger surge through your body all over again. Hands wriggling angrily against his as he stepped closer, concern clear as day on his features but you could not bring yourself to care. All your deepest insecurities rearing their ugly head at you, a sob threatening to escape from your throat as an uncomfortable feeling settled into your stomach. A feeling that you would not be enough, not for your family, not for Jake, not for the clan.
Your anger peaked, a scream was ready to erupt from your throat as Jake was not letting your wrist go, he was still trying to calm you down. You ripped your wrist from his grip in a whip of anger and felt all the air leave you at once. Your song chord had tangled along the leather braided clasps on Jake's wrist and ripped from yours, the beads falling like a waterfall all around the two of you. “No-no-no!”
Your eyes and hands frantically searched around for the pearl your father had given you, not locating it anywhere and a small whimper left your mouth as the tears flowed from your eyes and down to your neck.
Jake was on his hands and knees instantly as you wept, helping you gather the stones that had been placed on your chord, “Please just leave, Jake! Go with Neytiri and leave me alone.”
Your voice was raw with emotion and it made his heart clench, his ears twitched in confusion but he said nothing as he continued to gather all the beads he saw, an uncomfortable sting making its way to his wrist.
He could tell your holding back from sobbing, you had folded into yourself after all the stones were gathered, your back shaking from your tears. “I will help you build it back, I will weave the chord with you. I am so sorry.”
His hand had reached out to your shoulders pulling you up against him and into his chest, there was a strain on his wrist at the awkward way it bent causing a low hiss to fall from his lips. His hand settled on your head, rubbing soothingly as he felt you calm in his arms, a pinch each time his hand dragged forward but he didn’t care. “Will you let me help you?”
You whimpered quietly as you melted into his embrace, “There is no point.”
“What do you mean, tìyawn?”
You felt your heart flutter at the affectionate name, but your heart felt heavy as you realized you had lost the pearl your father had gifted you, “I lost the pearl for my Iknimaya. It was a pearl my father had gifted me, it meant so much to me and-and I waited for something that felt worthy of carrying the stone and now I have lost it. I no longer want a song chord.”
You broke out into another fit of tears, only this time wrapping your arms around Jake’s neck to find solace in him, and he comforted as best he could, wrapping his arms around you as his fingers traced your back to calm you down once again.
He felt the pinch against his wrist again, an irritation settling softly in his chest at the persistent sting. He pulled his arms closer to you so one rested on your hip while the other tried to unclamp the leather bracelets that sat on his wrist. When the bracelet was off he felt instant relief, his ears twitching at the sound of a pebble landing on the floor. He swore a silent prayer to Eywa fell from his lips as his eyes locked onto the pearl. It was iridescent and had small scratches since you wore your song chord almost everywhere. His fingers reached for the stone, picking it up gently as if he feared it would break under the weight of his fingers. “Is this it?”
Your head lifted from his chest, looking into his palm and a watery laugh left your throat, still thick with emotion as you reached out for it. You looked up into Jake’s eyes and it seemed like hundreds of tears kept flowing from your eyes, Jake's lips were turned downwards as he rubbed at your cheeks, trying to erase the evidence of your sadness. He hated it, he hated seeing you hurting and in that instant swore that he would spend the rest of his life trying to keep you happy.
“I do not like knowing you are sad.”
Your emotions consumed you once again as you stared up at him, eyes flickering to his lips for a brief second. Sniffling softly you leaned your face closer to him, pressing your forehead against his and you let your eyes flutter closed. You could not bear to look at him, he consumed you in every way and the clarity hit you like a ton of bricks. You were in love.
You let your lips fall against his in a quick motion, it was soft even though it only lasted a few seconds. When you pulled back his eyes were closed, cheeks a deep purple, ears twinging pink as he reeled from having your lips on his. “I am no longer sad, Jake. Just sorry, and embarrassed for how I behaved.”
He was all over you in the next instant, lips pressing into yours almost bruisingly as if he tried to forever engrain the feeling of your lips on his. Hands gripped at your hips tightly, pulling you flush against him and a small whine left your mouth. He used the gap between your lips to his advantage as he gently slipped his tongue, almost as if asking for permission. Your teeth softly bit down on the tip of his tongue, soothing it by sliding your own across his. He felt the groan come from the center of his chest, he felt all of you as he wrapped pulled you in closer.
You were the first to pull away, Jake’s lips chasing after your own as you sucked in a long breath, trying to fill your lungs with as much air as possible. You turned from him slightly and placed the pearl with your other stones, turning back to him as your eyes scanned all across his face. “I only want you, my tìyawn. No one else, do you understand me?”
You nodded and let your forehead fall against his again, whispering the words that told him just how you felt, “Oel ngati kameie.”
A laugh rippled from his throat and he placed a kiss to your cheek, “Oel”, a kiss to your nose, “Ngati”, a kiss to your lips, “Kameie”.
You finally pulled away from him, looking at the beads that Jake had gathered for you. “So you will help me?”
He nodded happily, watching your every move as you stood up, picking up a small box that was on your shelf. He couldn't stop the smile that fell on his lips as your tail switched softly, contemplating what material you wanted to hold your beads. You settled on a weaved tan thread, sitting back down next to Jake and you hummed quietly, “You do not have one right, Ma’Jake?”
Jake swore his heart was going to fall out of his chest, “No I do not-no one ever told me to make it so I did not think to do it.”
“You must make one now, we sing the song chord to remember. Each bead is a story in our life.”
Your fingers brushed Jake’s as you handed over the extra piece of string for him to use, placing the box in between the two of you, full of beads, some simpler than others but just as beautiful. The two of you settled into a comfort silence, Jake pausing on occasion to think on certain events that were important enough to add to his chord, digging his fingers into the box.
You had finished your chord quickly, knowing it by memory and Jake noticed you had not added any new beads, until the last one, that one was new.
It was a soft shade of blue, it stood out beautifully against the majority of white and brown of it. “That is new.”
His fingers ran across your song chord, it was so much more intricate than his, showing just how proud you should be of yourself, now a constant reminder how he will always be proud of you. “It is for you, Toruk Makto.”
You flushed and shied away from him as his ears twitched, pulling his own chord out to share it with you, explaining what each one meant. When he reached the last stone, it was a deep red, one that shined if light reflected on, “This one-It’s for you. My tìyawn.”
You reached for his hand and wrapped the chord twice around his wrist, “I am ready, to be mated.”
He let his fingers trace your palm, going over each line and scar, even tracing over the small callouses the tips of your finger had accumulated from training with your arrow. He was smiling so hard, cheeks hurting as he leaned over to pick up your own chord and wrap it around your wrist, it looped three times. “I want a huge ceremony, with a huge feast and lots of music and dancing.”
Your hand flew to your mouth as you tried to stop the laughter that bubbled at your throat, “I do not need such a big fuss over me, Ma’Jake.”
He brought you even closer to him, pressing a kiss to your cheek as he announced, “But I do, I want all of the Omaticaya clan to know I am mated to you. Forever you and me.”
Another burst of warmth fell over you, pressing a kiss to his lips before you moved to sit against him, your back pressed firmly to his chest as his arms wrapped around your frame, “Now tell me, what do the other beads represent?”
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the-badger-mole · 1 month ago
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It All Comes Down
He hadn't meant it. He hadn't. Katara looked around the disaster zone that had once been one of King Bumi's finest stone gardens. The statues were all smashed to bits, and the earth torn violently in several patches, but that was no problem for a master earthbender like Bumi. The trees were a lost cause, though. Several dozen koi flopped helplessly in the mud that had once been their pond, but the palace gardeners were too frightened to come out and try to save them. Katara lifted her hand slightly, absently thinking she should pull as much water as she could back into the empty basin, but she barely felt the water around her.
"I'm sorry," Aang said, looking at his feet, shamefully. "I didn't mean it." Katara's eyes drifted from the dying fish, to her boyfriend. She nodded stiffly, feeling numb. Of course he hadn't meant it.
"Katara!" Sokka's shouting sounded like it was coming through water, but that couldn't be. The fish wouldn't be dying if there was that much water.
Sokka, Zuko and Toph were running towards them from inside Bumi's castle. There was worry on all of their faces, but Katara didn't know why. They should be as used to this as she was. After all, Aang was the Avatar. Things like this happened when he got upset.
"What's going on?" Zuko demanded. "Are you okay?" Katara started to say yes, but then Zuko grabbed her arm and held it up. There was an ugly gash on her arm- from an errant stone, she guessed. It was shallow, but it was wide, and blood was trickling down her arm, making her torn sleeve stick to her skin. Zuko tore the fabric away from the rest of her shirt and held it to the wound to stop the bleeding. He didn't ask why Katara wasn't healing it herself.
"What happened?" Sokka asked. He looked around at the wreckage in confusion, as if expecting to see signs of an attack. Aang's face had gone beet red with embarrassment.
"I-I got upset," he said.
"Yeah, Aang," Toph snorted. "We gathered that when a bunch of servants ran screaming that the Avatar was destroying the garden. What we want to know is why."
"I-I don't know," Aang shook his head helplessly. "I just...Katara was saying that she agreed to help her father work on some trade deals with Bumi and King Kuei, and she's going to have to spend more time in the Southern Tribe." A look of confusion passed through the group.
"And?" Zuko pressed. He looked up from where he was tending to Katara's injury.
"I got upset!" Aang said, as if that explained everything. His friends started at him blankly. Uncomprehendingly. He took a breath and tried again. "I've barely seen her at all this year. She's been in the Southern Tribe so long working on the school, and all these projects that keep popping up. I thought she was going to be done, and we could get back to helping the rest of the world. When she said she would have to go back for even longer, I just..."
Aang held his hands up and gestured weakly around the ruins. There was a long silence as his friends tried to process what he was saying. Sokka caught up first. He looked from the broken statues, torn up trees and the dying fish, to his shell-shocked and bleeding sister.
"You had a tantrum because my sister wants to stay home for a couple more months?" Rage rolled off of Sokka in almost tangible waves. "You did all of this- you hurt my sister because she wants to help our home?"
"I'm so sorry," Aang stepped forward, his hands opened in supplication, but Zuko stepped between them.
"Stay away from her." He glowered at Aang. Katara watched her boyfriend flinch away. Zuko hadn't used that tone with Aang in years. Not since they'd been on opposing sides of a war. Katara thought she should scold him for it, but her tongue felt so heavy. Then everyone else had joined in on shouting at Aang.
Katara's gaze drifted back to the fish. Their movements were slowing. A few of them had stopped altogether. She should have saved them. That was how this always worked. She would get Aang out of of the Avatar State, and then she would help him clean up. That's how it always worked.
But she was the reason he was upset this time. She had anticipated his disappointment, after all, he had been dropping hints for a while that he wanted to move forward. He had marriage on his mind. He wanted her by his side always. That had sounded romantic once. Now, surrounded by broken earth and dying fish, it sounded like a threat.
"I can't do it," she said quietly.
"What did you say?" Zuko asked, whirling back around to Katara
"I can't do this anymore," she said a bit louder. She stepped forward, pushing past Sokka, Zuko and Toph, who all seemed about ready to throw blows, and stood in front of Aang.
"Katara, I'm so-"
"Stop," Katara cut him off. She swallowed hard past a lump in her throat. "I can't do this anymore, Aang."
"I know," Aang said. "I'm sorry. I promise, I am working on controlling the Avatar State, but it's so hard-"
"Aang," Katara's voice was sharp, and it echoed against the walls surrounding the courtyard. "Stop. I can't do this anymore. I'm not talking about pulling you out of the Avatar State. I mean, this. Us. I can't do this anymore."
"You don't mean that." Aang moved forward again, reaching out for Katara, but Zuko and Sokka stepped up to flank her. The ground shook slightly, only just enough to feel it, but Toph's threat was clear. Aang shrank back, but kept up his pleading silently.
"I mean it Aang," Katara said stonily. "Look what you've done. And it's not the first time. When we were kids, I could understand it. You were still learning. But this? Aang, you've had seven years to get this under control. What happens the next time I upset you? Are you going to blow up something in my face again? Are you going to accidentally hit me with rocks? I can't live like that." Katara shook her head, trembling with dread at what her life with Aang would look like.
She could imagine spending the rest of her life walking on eggshells, trying to avoid setting him off. Her ambitions would be set aside for fear that they might take her away from Aang's side for too long. What if her children were waterbenders instead of airbenders? Would she have to protect them from setting Aang off too? Would the rest of her life be spent cleaning up Aang's messes?
"You don't mean that." Aang's eyes had filled with tears. He tried to step towards Katara again, but his feet were suddenly cased in stone to his knees. He turned to Toph, his eyes wide with betrayal.
"I mean it, Aang." The finality of Katara's words settled over the group like a heavy blanket. She sighed, suddenly exhausted, and pulled as much water as she could to put back in the pond. A few of the koi began swimming sluggishly. Many stayed at the bottom. Katara had done what she could.
One last mess, she thought.
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thewritetofreespeech · 2 months ago
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Could I request Gojo with an s/o who can manipulate all sorts of liquids and fluids?
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Gojo knew he was strong, but there were limits to his abilities.
The first and most glaring of which was that there was only 1 of him. Though his powers were almost infinite, Gojo could really only be in one place at a time. Sure, with his speed he could get to any number of spots quick as a flash, but that wouldn’t help anything at the moment as they were over run. Besides which, who would he chose?
Yuji? The boy who was scheduled to die, but Gojo stuck his neck out for. The physically strongest but arguably the weakest of them as he didn’t have the life time of training most of them had. The boy thrust into this world with the hardest of shoves.
Nobara? Their big fish in the small pond. Though she was adapting to the bigger pond remarkably fast, the limitations of her curse technique were starting to show. He would have to teach her some ways to overcome that. He couldn’t do that if she was dead, but would it be sexist to save the girl first?
Megumi? His notable favorite. The student he had had the longest. The stray he had taken in. Genuinely the strongest of his kids from a technique standpoint but had a blind spot in his need to help others. He was spending so much time trying to save Yuji & Nobara on his own, he seemed unable to see that he was about to get swallowed up on his own.
Who was he supposed to choose? How was he supposed to choose?
The choice became irrelevant rather quickly as suddenly there was a flood of rushing water that whizzed past them. Coiling through the mass as pipes burst, one after the other, in the abandoned subway. Washing away the transfigured souls and curse spirits away like leaves on a stream.
“Are you all alright?” The group looked up to see [Y/N] there. Descending on a mirror like pool from the air towards the ground.
“Of course we’re fine.” Nobara insisted. “We had it under control.”
“Of course you did dear.” [Y/N] didn’t believe her either.
“Where do you think they all went [Y/N]-sensei?” Megumi asked as he looked down the once again abandoned tunnel.
“Who knows.” They told him. “Legend has it that there is an apex at the middle of all subways where all the lines collect. That’s where the rat people live.”
“The rat people?!” Yuji questioned.
“Maybe that’s just New York.”
Gojo chuckled. He came over and kissed their temple. Glad to have them here, and his students safe. “Thanks for the assist babe.”
“Don’t mention it.” They reply with a soft smile. “Now, as for where they were all going…” [Y/N]’s hand flinched, and suddenly a figure came out of the shadows. Clearly against their will as their limbs moved on their own like puppet strings and blood beaded out of their locked jaw. “I think this one might have some answers.”
Gojo smirked. “Oh ho... you’re in trouble now…” He might be the strongest, but his partner was the scariest jujutsu sorcerer around. Especially when you messed with their students & lover.
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sukioyakio · 4 months ago
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Siren Sukuna
an:just more headcannon on this au,and more in sight of reader. Also maybe edited or not 😭 Part|, Part||, Part|||
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TheifReader who has been stealing stuff all her life,and now she’s this Sukuna company for life.(and she did once not come back with food and ended up sleeping in an empty alleyway.And she after that day she learned her lesson about the spell he put on her,her whole half body hurted)
Theifreader Who completely amazes and terrified of Sukuna.And at times she wonder if she will one day his lunch.
It was a good afternoon at the new place,and reader was very pleased with watching the little fishes in the pond.Your smiling at how cute the fishes look. Until A large sea creatures with reddish scales just bite off the fishes body and then killed them with his hands.In which your mouth dropped in sadness and disgust. And then Sukuna coming up to the coming up to the shore where you were.Just to show you how he brutally killed the fish with just his teeth and nails. “W-wwhat ..w-why the Fishes,I-i would’ve got food” You said completey upset at him eating the fishes.As you watch him tear up the fish head so easily and eating it. As you see him look at you with a Uninterested look. “Don’t care about your opinions brat,I was hungry” he replied while he sides another fish in his mouth.As you gulp down saliva in horror. ‘Oh lord,why did you give me to him,he just gonna eat me up’ You mentally said,shaking your head to the horrible thought of it.
TheifReader Who just gets lost in sight of staring at Sukuna body,and at times you wonder how such a beautiful creature would have a scary presence.(Girl is completely oblivious to her little feeling for the damn fish),Whenever she get food in the afternoon and if she has extra time she’ll looks though rich folk house and try not to get caught up in the act of robbing jewelry or jewels that reminds her of the scary siren.And then brings to him as a gift from her. After she done running away from the guards.
After running a while from the guards and making sure that the food wasn’t too shaken up by all the running (she gets her food from a old friend who had known her since she started her life a thief and treated her like a family friend) when you got to the large pond,you walked around the grass and announced your arrival to a particular siren fish.You were more happy to show the jewelry you ahem borrowed from. ”Sukuna!!Im back from My visit” You announced once again,now continue walking towards the water fall,As you wait near where the water fall to see if the red siren would appear. As you watch the sky and sun shine turn it into it most beautiful colors.You put the plates of food onto the ground so you could glance at the jewelry you brought. Dangling it in the sky The red ruby shines with the sunlight making it look so beautiful and divine.It was a Necklace with gold base but the charm was a skeleton case in a ruby gem. ”Brat im here” Sukuna response with a big yawn on his mouth as he swim where your at.His face shows disinterested in what your holding. As you turn to see him at the shore of the pond,you smile at him;you quickly put the jewelry’s in your pocket and grab the plates of food.Now Sitting off in the shore as you give him his plate of food (ever since your first day of giving him food he clearly didn’t like vegetables very much but liked meat). You haven’t look at him or touch your plate yet. He quickly grab the plate and began chomping on the cooked meats.He could see that you had something to say to him,either it was another question or another story time. ”What is it women,You haven’t touched your plate yet or it because you think very highly of me and give it to me” Sukuna says with a tease and a smug smile as he plotted another steak into his mouth. You look at him with an ‘Are you seriously think that’ kind of face.You just mutter ‘as if’ underneath your breath.As you sip out a heavy sigh.And began talking.And as observant Sukuna is when reading your expression,he couldn’t read this one.Which has him curious about what it is. “It nothing,I swear” You said with an awkward smile waving your hands as to dismiss it.Sukuna wasn’t going to have you ditch what bothering you. ”Spilled it already brat” He replied with a glare of irritation at your attempt of dismissing your point. You flinch at his gaze as you started to speak. ”o-ok alright,I’ll just didn’t think you’ll like it,but I got you a small little gift,Well it almost got me stopped by the guards but I couldn’t stop myself from getting these jewelry.It reminded me of you so here it is” You rapidly spoke with a little shy smile scratching the back of your neck. As you go into your pocket and show the necklace and the other jewelry such as rings with red gems on it. You even stole some from the those stands that sell jewelry. As you show the necklace,while holding it with delicacies. If anything hearing you talk about how stuff reminded you of him made him feel something in heart that he had never felt in his entire fish existence. Which get this scary looking fish cheeks and ears red.Who just flick your forehead off,making you groan out in pain. You put the necklace down to rub your forehead But without asking him a simple question. “So Do you like it?Can I put it on you”You asked him with a cheeky smile,As you watch him covered his face his large hand.He doesn’t want to appear weak.He just grumble about how stuipd of a brat you have to be. “Ugrh no now just eat your food before I do it for you”
Siren Sukuna who still allows you to put on the necklace on;on the very next day.With some Grumbling and hissing he allow you.In which he couldn’t admit that he didn’t enjoy seeing how you smiled at him When you were done with puttting the necklace.
Siren Sukuna who at random days Tells you mini stories about his life,either it would be about the spells he could do or how many people he had killed in one day.
“I have family out there in the ocean” He says nonchalantly without a single thought to what he said,floating in the pond watching the clouds move and the sun shining down onto them with it warmth as well it breeze of cool air. As you were doing the same watching the sky with a small smile on your face,as you lay on the bright green grass. ”that cool. .. must be nice to have family there” You breathlessy says without a the need the need to continue on. You pause for a moment before riseing up from your position and turning your head to him with a confused face. ”arent your family just fishes,how can you called them family if you literally eat them?”You answered him with your hands animating how he eat fishes. ”No you fuck tard,How dumb are you,Brat.Never mind what I said.” He replied with irritation creeping up his face. “Nuh Uh!!Your not leaving nor swimming out this conversation”
Siren Sukuna hates whenever you ask him to do your hair,or help you brush the nuts off.Like what is he your maid or somthing.(he still does it,but at times he will tug down on your hair on purpose)
”OWW!!!Please Don’t fucking brushed so hard” You said with a mumbbling of how your head hurted. It was technically your fault for asking a siren to do your hair,and the first thing he bring is a fork (I could never use a little mermaid reference 🙄)He just replied with it your fault that you don’t have a high pain tolerance or not being able to do your hair. “Shut it brat you want your hair down or not”He harshly says. “Urghh fine stupid brunt fish” you replied as soon as you finish speaking another tug was done again.You cried out in pain and curses at Sukuna. And Sukuna smirking devilish.
Siren Sukuna Who randomly blurs out that he can use a spell to give him a human form just to see your reaction.
”WAIT!!Really?!?Then why don’t you use it fish!” You exclaimed loudly as you shakes your hands up in frustration as an angry pout is painted across your face. And a smug expression is painted on his as well. ”I Still dont believe you,Fried fish,how About you show me your big fat lie of a spell!” You announced to Sukuna with a disbelieving eyes staring down at Sukuna red orbs. ”And what make you think you are deserving to see my human form or matter of fact spell,maybe if you don’t talk for a whole day then I’ll be willing to show it to you” He says with confidence and proud,his voice carrying himself as you pout for a bit then put on a fake smile. ”you know how your pretty voice of a siren would do for me when I do my job aka stealing,quick answer FUCKING EASY!” You yelled at him with your hand crossed at him. You felt a sense of pain flatter on your shoulder,making you cry out in pain. You glare at Sukuna.Ofc Sukuna pinches you if you become to loud.
Siren Sukuna who doesn’t know or want to understand what he was feeling when you came back from the city all hurt and bloody.But he hated the most is when you came back to him like your left leg isn’t broken or the fact your shoulder is bleeding out blood because of a arrow.With a reassuring smile to think that he’ll be alright to see you like that.
It was your fault for thinking that you’ll be able to steal something from the royals house.The First thing that was wrong,was that you decided to steal something in daylight.You didn’t even get anywhere near the castle.Because you landed off and broke your left leg. But you push yourself to walk into the house and quickly walked into whatever room and steal anything.But right when you were going to walk out one of the royal guards saw you and yelled at you and yelled for backup.In Which your body was in fight or flight and you started to run as fast as you could even if it meant hurting your left leg. You were able to get on top of houses to jump onto other house so the royal guard couldn’t get you.But even that they were able to land a arrow onto your shoulder. All you thought was going back to the pond. When the guard shot you in the should you were going to jump down the last house,but you slip your landing badly,hitting your head onto the building but your made it,and continue to push the pain and run down onto the grass of the exits. But your head was bleeding and blood dripping from your head onto your face. Full on running,toward the pond and fully escaped the guards.You try to maintain your breathing while trying to keep focus on your movements and not the pain that radiates through your body.As you pass through multiple trees. When you made it to the pond you couldn’t even see clearly,holding your right arm close to at least stop the bleeding.You couldn’t think properly as you called out for a fellow fish. “S-sukuna!!-You cough up a bit of blood walking more closely to the pond before-Sukuna. . . I’m back.”You breathlessly spoke up,as your breathing was becoming more heavy and unsteady. Sukuna lazily got out of the little cave inside the water fall and now swimming up to the surface with a completely disinterested look. That until he saw you in that state,His eyes widened in fear or in shock or in anger he couldn’t tell. ”What the fuck happened!”He exclaimed in a harsh tone but lance with concern.Already in your direction.He could see that your breathing isn’t steady. And the fact you couldn’t even stand properly. “O-oh hi Sukuna… L-look what I got for. . Y-you” You replied barley properly with each other word your breathing get more shaky. You took out two bracelet pieces with a weak small. ”Fucking Brat!! I didn’t ask for that! I’m asking what the fuck happened to your body!!You can’t even walk or breathe properly!!Stop fucking smiling at him like that When your ass is fucking bleeding out so much”He yelled with a stern and cold voice as his eyes were filled with anger,fear,and worry. His heart beating and pounding against his heart.He fucking didn’t even know why he so scared if that what he calls it. “Ha-ha … you should look at . . . Yourself. . it was.. T-the guards”You said so weak and small before you could even get to give his bracelet.your vision turn black and you collapse onto the grassy ground. When Sukuna saw you collapse onto the ground his heart sank into a thousand pieces,He scream your name out as he quickly transformed into his human form and carried you into his large body. He started to perform his healing spells on you,as he curse multiple times underneath his breath,about how dumb you are and that he hates how you brings him things that he doesn’t need like your jewelry’s. He nevers wants to see you like this ever again.You made a deal with him and you will keep it.
Siren Sukuna Who makes sure to visit the city,especially to the royal guards and burn and killed multiple people with the same logo of the arrow that was used to shoot you in the shoulder. And when he was done he cancel his fire spell and Grabs him clothes for him to cover his naked body and some clothes for you too. (He says that he did this not for you,yea right.But for him to remember that he is still the strongest creature alive)
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That all I wrote today,I hope you like this one,even though I Think I wrote a little too much 🥲
But if you have any suggestions or ideas or opinions on this please feel free to share them in the comments.
Made by @sukioyakio
also thank you for 180 followers
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threepandas · 3 months ago
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Bad End: Heroic Collection
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New Haven wasn't a major metropolis. Some big city like Delhi or Tokyo, Jakarta and the like. It was big for the area. A major hub for commerce and crime on a local scale. But Nationally? INTERNATIONALLY? Not even close. No matter WHAT the great ambitions that haunted the Mayor, late at night, may tell you.
So, really, there was NO fucking reason for any A Listers to be here.
NONE.
Our biggest exports were fancy fucking jams and that one fashion line I couldn't pronounce. We had honest to God Jam festivals in the fall. It was a circuit, Mayor gave out awards. There were pies. Firestrike always ate himself sick. Agent always laughed at him. I... Fuck, my head was ringing. I'd hit that last building HARD. Was pretty sure I tasted blood. Not... not sure if that was because I busted something in my mouth or...
Over my comms, I could hear my teammates fighting. Trying to hail the Alliance. If we could... could just hold on...
Long enough for the major players to GET here?
Then what? I had to wonder. Staring at a burning bus in front of me. It was half way lodged through Mrs. Brahimi's shop. Please, God, let her and the workers have got out all right. I'd been there just this morning. She made me those stuffed flatbread things. Said I was still too skinny. Should rest more.
I use the twist remains of a book return to lever myself to my feet. Book..? Oh. I'm by the library. Which..? Fuck. Main one. That's city hall.
Smoke rises around the city I've lived in all my life. Fires everywhere. I'm supposed... supposed to be a hero. But I can barely stand. Feel sick as the world sways. My body is one big bruise. Gotta... gotta keep fighting. Helping. Save people.
In the distance, I can hear screams.
I'm coming. I promise. I'm coming!
I make my screaming body move. Stumble. Catch myself. Then keep going. The hiss and spit in my ear tells me that my communicator is probably half broken. I don't try it, in case that breaks it the rest of the way. Wrench doors from half crushed cars to free trapped civilians. Lever wreckage, hold it with trembling limbs, so people can crawl to safety. Run. Please, god, RUN!
We aren't strong enough.
He's here, The Collective.
A hivemind super threat. Alien supposedly. So far above my team's pay grade we know basically nothing. The kind of thing we were expected to never realistically see. We're nobody's. Fuck it, we're HAPPY being nobody's. It meant we got to go home each night. Didn't face The Horrors. Like him.
He CONSUMES.
Hungry. Trying to fill some void that's never going to fill. Supposedly a planet eater. Gutting worlds for resources, materials, to continue his own expansion. Now fixated on Earth for it's continued refusal to die. For its defiance. Some A+ sort of monster, to our high C rank. At best.
Fuck... we dealt with HUMANS. Fought gimmicks and tech. Little fish in our little pond. Now this tsunami was bringing the ocean to US and it was all we could do, to swim and survive.
I leaned against a half smashed car. Braced myself against it, more then anything, then started pulling pot shots. I... I was gonna black out soon. With a concussion like this? Probably wasn't gonna be waking up. Especially if those THINGS found me before a friendly did.
All across the city I called home, The Collective had Drones tearing the place apart.
They'd almost be pretty. Tall, elegant, androgynous lookin, supermodel twinks in battle armor. Drones apparently covered their lower face. I'd know the "commander" by their uncovered face and "use of adornments". Useful! Except they could fucking SWITCH on command, so you have to take out ALL of them.
Because they weren't a collection of different soldiers.
THEY weren't a THEY. That? Was a fucking HE. Singular.
You don't consider each of your individual cell as people. Each follicle of hair. Why would HE? God damn it. It was like fighting a giant. Against Gods. They just kept coming. And my ammo? Was not endless.
Worse. The drones had stopped looking. I don't know WHAT they had been searching for. But now? They started to converge on me. On city hall. Fuck. I... I couldn't even really stand anymore. My vision was blurring. I knew for a FACT my shots were shit. But dense as they were crowding? It seemed enough. Kept them back.
Three cartridges left.
Two.
Only one more...
The Alliance was coming. Half my team had gone silent. I could hear tears in the voice of Tech, back in the office. They had our life signs. Built into our armor. I could only imagine what mine looked like. Prayed, like I hadn't since I was a kid, that the others were just unconscious. Safe somewhere.
Someplace this nightmare couldn't reach them.
I doubted I was that lucky.
Tech was begging me to hold on. Giving me ETAs. And... And I was out of bullets. The block half full of Drones. I had escrima sticks. A fucking tazer. It would have to do. Sticks came out, as I swayed to my feet. No longer letting the car behind me hold my weight. What's a little... let's say, hundred or so, on one? Eh?
Bring your friends. Let's make it a fair fight.
I'll go easy on you.
Bravado until the end. Remember, never know who's watching. You are a symbol. Before you are a man, you are their HERO. Don't you DARE let them down. Even if you die. Especially when you die. B.. Bravado until the end. Plaste on a smirk and say a one-liner, we got hope to shoulder.
I took down about three Drones... I think... before the rest swarm me.
Feel hands pinning my arms. My torso. Everything. A weak point between the panels is ripped open. High grade military fabrics doing jack shit against their impossible strength. The distinct pinch tug of a needle in my skin. Cold spreading. The sudden exhaustion of a powerful sedative. I... am gone.
Time... is blurry.
Now and Then running together in my senses. My brain. The concussion doesn't help. Or... or didn't? It feels... gone? Gone-ing? Oh... look, sky. Clouds. Pretty. Wasn't I standing? I am standing. No... no being dragged. Chair? Not chair. Stairs? Carried. Pretty window..... where am I? Fuzzy. Bluzzy fuzzy purple beans~ he he he~ oh! Those are the... watch'ma call it! Gucci chairs! That rich lady had! Neat. Plurble.
Ouch! Why'd you pi...?
My mouth is dry as sand. But suddenly? I am hyper aware. The floating drift of my mind VIOLENTLY gone, replaced by alerted and focus. Drones surround me in a vaguely familiar hallway. Shit. I think it's that rich designer's place. My helmet is off, but my mask is still in place, thank god. The Drones stand far to close for my liking. Their many eyes, amused.
So glad to entertain, you Fuck.
I am frog marched down the hall. Damn near dragged. They were too smart to restrain me with my own cuffs, unfortunately. So my hands are bound behind my back with something tight I can't get a good feel off. Bastard secured it to my belt, too. Great.
The Collective's "Face" is surrounded by what must be every jewel in the city. Piled high in some vague sorting pattern I refuse to even try and comprehend. He's trying on rings. One on every finger, to see what matches his skin tone. Looks good. Already, he has a pearl stud and some earrings he's decided he likes. He looks up as I'm dragged in, and I realize immediately what one of "a few other differences" between him and the Drones are...
It's the EYES,
They GLOWED.
Metallic almost. Nearly neon. They reflected the light in a way the Drones simply did not. It made their face... horrificly predatory. Made for WATCHING, somehow. Unnerving and haughty. Beautiful still, but uncomfortable to be near.
Sitting up on a table that basicly swallows the room, dead center like a show piece on display, with one long leg tossed over the other and no fucking shirt on? The Face looks almost carefully, artfully, staged. To maximize some "haughty yet coy, alien prince who maybe wants to fuck you" shtick.
Does... Does he not realize I'm NOT one of the usual opponents? I mean. Flattered at the "join me! The Darkside has sex and cookies!" set up. Always fun. Classic, really. But, like? I would be... at BEST... a solidly MID goon.
Also "NO".
Gonna preemptively throw that out there. Maybe some expletives for flavor. Suggest someplace sunless to shove it. SOLID "No". Good try, though.
Around me, the Drones are shaking with silent laughter. Staring down at me, their pale eyes dancing with amusement. It's creepy as hell. Unnerving to be the center of attention like this. For this many eyes, utterly in synch, to surround and watch my every twitch. Act fascinated and amused, like I'm some little animal performing tricks.
The Face hasn't dropped his Seduction to the Darkside routine. If anything, he seems delighted by the defiance. Which... yeah, that tracks. It's why he's harrasing out planet to begin with. That one's definitely on me. So, better question? Not that I'm not glad and all? Why the FUCK am I not dead.
"And lose my HERO? Perish the thought~" drawles The Collective, the posture light and lazy, even as something dangerous threaded itself through their tone. It sounded... possessive. But that couldn't be right. "I would NEVER do such a thing! In fact, we are going to have to be far more careful with that little processor of yours. Far too fragile. Just the one, too. Horrifying, really."
Thanks. Just what every guy loves to really make 'im feels special. Insults.
Fucker.
More laughter from all around me. I grit my teeth. Come oooon, Alliance. Where the hell ARE you guys!? Could REALLY use a rescue! The hands holding me still are drifting. Fucking handsy. Damn near stroking even as they hold me immobile. They're looking for the clasps and buckles on my armor. Have already found the obvious ones. Fingers oh so casually drifting over, to grip, flex, and tear them apart.
I do NOT like how loose my armor is starting to feel. Barely able to hold on. Protect me. Limited as that protection may be. I think I'm developing a horrifying empathy for clams. Crustaceans in general. Anything that gets slowly pried from the safety of it's shell, too certain doom.
The Face casually tosses the rings he was playing with aside. Tens of thousands of dollars bouncing off to God only knows where. He slides from the table to stand. Shit. He's huge.
The androgynous twink supermodel thing he has going on? Fucking LIES. Twists your perception of how, EXACTLY, strong the Face body IS. He clears seven feet easily, is muscled in that distinctly "never see me coming until it's too late" sort of way all the ninja types are.
The tattoos. It's the FUCKING tattoos! They give the illusion that he's slimmer then he actually is.
It HIDES MUSCLE MASS.
I can't tell if that's vanity or strategy and I hate it. Glare as he sashays towards me. Hips rolling in that elegant catwalk strut. I'm forced to my knees. Because of course I am. How ELSE will the bastard loom and gloat? Though really, weak as I currently feel, it's more that the Drones holding me up? Stop doing that. My knees more or less just give up on their own.
"Like what you see? You're staring so intently~" He mocks. If he were being genuine, I'd call it teasing. Flirtatious. But I know better. "It IS a pretty body, isn't it? I worked hard on it, you know. All sort of fun little details~ Might honestly be one of my favorites. If you're good for me, I'll let you explore it~"
THERE it is.
Darkside. Sex and cookies. Sign up today. Fuck you and not in the fun way. Keep your hands to yourself, Collective. You're not convincing me. You could tell me the sky was blue, and I'd make three presentations with a PowerPoint, on why you were a liar. No, still No, and a hefty fuck off No for spice.
Three steps away. Two steps. One.
A man that tall and dangerous? Frankly did NOT need heels. Figures he'd wear them anyway. Sharp enough to kill a man. Right infront of my folded knees. I refuse to look up. No more fucking games. Did have to wonder, though, if those pants... if they even WERE pants? Were painted on or not. Very tight. Looked vaguely metal yet leather.
Shit.
Fingers, splayed wide as they run themselves through my sweaty and probably bloodstained hair. Couldn't have been nice to touch. Wrong angle and just a touch too big to be a Drone. Light as a lover, sweet almost, soothing. Before it inevitably tightens, gripping the strands. Honestly not as hard as I expected, didn't even hurt.
Still, my head is forced back.
Back and back and back, forced to arch my spine, hang awkwardly at some forty-five degree angle. My thighs and abs already screaming. A Drone grabs the back of my armor and, with an almost casual yank, my chest plate is violently snapped free. Both tossed to the floor away from us.
"There we are~" the Face hums down at me, eyes nearly hypnotic in how the light moved from within, grin full of sharp and deadly teeth. "No more of that ugly thing in the way. I much prefer this~"
"Tell me, Little Hero, do you remember? Becoming mine."
No, I certainly do fucking not. What the HELL is he-!? From behind the Face a Drone steps. Dressed differently to the others. Casual clothes. Like... actual street clothes. If they weren't GREEN I never would been able too-...
In horror, I watch as the pigment of the Drones skin melts away to a middling average. So utterly nondescript a blend of ethnicities that it's genuinely hard to place, but won't stand out no matter where he goes in the city.
I... I had seen that face.
SAVED that man.
Thought he was CUTE! T..Thought WE were having some sort of MEET CUTE! Oh God. That was at the festival. I was out of costume. Saved him from getting crushed. Then my teammates handled everything before I could slip away. So I just... stayed. Showed the cute tourist the festivities.
We ate FANCY JAMS, YOU FUCK!
I pined our that cute tourist for WEEKS. Was UNBEARABLE. Tech threatened to shove me off a roof! Oh my god.
Laughter.
Dozens of mouths, laughing in perfect sync. The noise layered and bouncing strangely around the room. Deeper then it should be, higher as it swings. Like a radio or voice modulator that someone is messing with. A momentary loss of control. My anger fizzles out to fear. Oh... oh yeah...
I forgot I was fucked.
At.. at least I know why?
A step forward. Past too close and now basically in my lap. A foot on either side of my knees. I try not to think exactly where my face would be pressed if I wasn't dragged back, to hang near painfully arched, so he could lean down and I could be forced to make eye contact. That way lay madness.
He moved his other hand to my face, cupping it. Dragging his thumb possessively across my mouth. He hummed, pleased.
He pressed closer, sliding down my front to his knees, straddling my lap. REALLY hoped that WAS, in fact, a weapon in your pocket there, buddy. Because I am not liking the handsy direction this is going, nor have I come to terms with my meet cute being a monstrous planet killing warlord. Not feeling sexy, my guy.
....okay, a LITTLE sexy, but that is hormones and we ignore those.
Fuuuuuck, wandering haaaaands! Now would be a GOOD TIME for door kicking rescues! I do NOT want to learn anything new about myself today! I want to go HOME. Sleep forever, maybe! Have a burrito the size of my head! Oh god. Think unsexy thoughts. Math. Sad puppies! Sad puppies doing MATH!
The Collective had dragged me upright. Pressed my face right up against their Face's bare skin. All I could smell was expensive cologne and man. Warm skin. Oh god, I am so gay. This is hell and I am very, VERY gay. If evil, why sexy hot hot hot? Hormones are making very convincing arguments. Horny brain says let's make terrible life choices.
No! Nooooo. Stop it, Me! We are fucking better then this! God damn it, you trainwreck, you are a ROLE MODEL! Act like one! (But horny...) (NO!!!)
God I was never going to mock the fuckers who hesitates at the "sex n cookies" speech again. Persuasive mother FUCKER!
"Aah~" he sighed contentedly, far too close to a moan for my sanity's liking. Hands having finally found the hidden zippers of my undersuit. Slowly dragging it open. "You are FAR too cute~♡"
"I can't wait to get you off this worthless little rock. Back to ME. I'll have so many WAYS to take care of you~ Backups and rudimentary supports we can set up, at least until I get you something proper."
Horrifying. Deeply Horrifying. REALLY never wanted to know what terrified and horny felt like, but here we are. Distantly, I hear thunder. There's no clouds. A flash of red through the skies. Green followed by metallic purple. Oh thank fuck. Keep his attention. Just... just keep his attention.
"We'll use me as a base. Keep you in stasis. Away from all these ugly, dangerous things~! Just you and me. Perfect. BETTER. Infinite and beautiful. I'll make all sort of bodies just for you to play with. Even let you keep this one! If you want. It'll be a precious memory for us, of where you began. How we met."
A mouth on mine. I can't breathe. Can't escape the arms wrapped around me. My protests do little more then waste oxygen. I feel light headed. Come one, team Alliance! He's here! HE'S HERE!!!
"You're going to be MINE, little Hero. I finally figured it out. What I was missing. It was YOU~♡! My beloved, delicate, little thing~. I'm going to take SUCH good care of you."
"Forever~"
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fayes-fics · 1 year ago
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Moments: Like Father, Like Son
Moments Masterpost
Pairing: Benedict Bridgeton x fem!reader
Summary: One-shot set in the Moments universe. Thomas inherits a rather embarrassing trait from his father...
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Artwork credit: @margowritesthings 
Warnings: none... this is pure fluff and humour.
Word Count: 1.8k
Author's Note: It's been AGES since I did anything in the Moments verse. This idea has been kicking around in my drafts for six months, maybe more. Thanks to @chaoticcalzoneranchsports, who came up with this idea with me all that time ago. This is very silly, light-hearted family nonsense. Enjoy! <3
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“What the…?”  Benedict’s voice fades out, standing by the window.
“What is it, my love?” you ask mildly, taking a bite of toast as you read the newspaper.
“Thomas… he is running full pelt down the lawn… absolutely nude,” he answers, perplexed, “.... and there goes Abigail…” he adds, referring to your nanny, “she can barely keep up, poor thing.”
Wiping the toast crumbs from your fingers onto a serviette, you get up, walk over to join your husband at the window, and have to stifle your giggle behind the back of your hand as you observe the tableau before you.
Out in the early morning sun is your youngest child, now four, running circles around his nanny, giggling loudly. As naked as the day he was born.
“You know you could go help her. Round up your son?” you twist your mouth into a bemused pout and look up at him, bumping him gently with your shoulder.
“She seems to have it in hand,” he responds as you both watch her change direction and fool Thomas, catching him and picking him up to bring him back indoors. “I do hope this doesn't become a habit,” Benedict comments airily as you retake your seats at the breakfast table.
“What makes you think it would?” you frown.
“No reason…” he responds, a little too hasty. 
Something in his tone makes you think there may be more to that story.
_____
“Mummy, Thomas has taken all his clothes off again.”
“Amelia, what are you talking about? And what do you mean by ‘again’?” you question your daughter as she throws herself into the chair next to yours on the terrace outside your home.
“He is always doing it, Mummy. Last week he lost a game of tag and took off his clothes in protest. Nanny Abigail had to give him bonbons to put them on again before you and Daddy got back from your walk,” she breezes, pushing a strand of hair from her face.
“Hmm, I never heard about that.”
“Well, now he’s done it again,” Amelia rolls her eyes.
“Where is he?” you ask.
“He's down by the fish pond. He's upset about something,” she shrugs.
“And his answer was to take his clothes off?” you check.
“Apparently,” she says dryly, with an almost world-weary expression of someone who has seen such a thing far too many times.
“Let's go find out what is going on, shall we?” you offer your hand to your daughter and round the garden to the pond where sure enough, your son is naked—and looks absolutely furious.
“Thomas,” you call gently, “what on earth is the matter, my love? And why are you without your clothes?”
“Frogs.” He opines—as if that one word explains everything.
“Explain to me, please, and put your clothes back on.”
“Do not want to,” he pouts.
“That was not a suggestion, Thomas,” you warn firmly and raise an eyebrow. All your children know better than to argue when you use that tone. 
Thomas stomps back to the pile of clothes and starts to redress with tantrum-like dramatic flair, and again, you have to stifle your giggles about his antics behind your hand.
“Now come here, my love,” you kneel now he is back in his shirt and trousers, holding your hands out wide for a hug, “and tell me what the problem is.”
“The tadpoles are not frogs yet, and Daddy said they would be soon. I want to see frogs Mummy,” he huffs into your shoulder as he accepts your embrace.
“Of course, Thomas. As soon as they are frogs, Daddy will show you. But why did you take off your clothes?”
He just shrugs as if even he doesn’t know why.
“Next time, rather than take off your clothes, please find me or Daddy, and we can talk about whatever is upsetting you,” you soothe.
“Alright,” he grumbles mutely.
_____
Later that night, as you lie in bed, you raise it with your husband.
“Thomas took off his clothes again,” you comment casually.
“Why?” Benedict puts down his book and frowns deeply as if he appears very troubled by the idea.
“He was upset about the tadpoles not being frogs,” you sigh, nonplussed.
“And his answer was to remove his clothes?”
“Yes.”
“What did you tell him?”
“To come and speak to you or me before taking off his clothes next time.”
“Let's hope that works,” Benedict hums thoughtfully. Again you get the sneaking suspicion there is something he is not telling you.
_____
You are hosting a party the following week with all the Bridgerton clan visiting your cottage when it happens again. The dinner table chat is lively and convivial as dessert is served. Suddenly the door swings open, and in runs your youngest son.
“Mummy, where is MooMoo?” Thomas calls loudly, asking about his favourite cow toy.
Everyone stops talking, their attention drawn to your child, completely unphased by his audience as he stands there. Once again, completely naked. 
Hyacinth snorts so loudly that apple juice shoots out of her nose just as Benedict slumps his head into his hands, mortified. As you go to stand and move him, Abigail bursts through the doorway, out of breath.
“My sincerest apologies, my lady,” she puffs, “he managed to unlock the nursery door somehow,” she adds very contritely, curtseying and picking Thomas up, bundling him out of the room before you can reply.
“Apologies for the interruption, everyone,” you call a vaguely embarrassed smile painted on your face as you gesture for them to continue talking as they were before. 
Conversation restarts, but as you take your seat at the far end from Benedict, you notice that Violet sitting next to you is trying valiantly but failing to control a bout of silent giggles. When she sees you looking at her, she attempts to school her expression and calm herself to speak.
“Oh my. I was wondering if this would ever come to haunt my darling son,” she stutters between laughs.
“What do you mean?” You ask, genuinely baffled.
She clutches her sides and dabs her eye. “Your husband was quite the nudist himself as a child,” she says drolly. “He would embarrass Edmund and me by bursting into soirées completely without his clothes. And he was so fast no one could ever catch him, the little scamp.”
Your eyes drift to Benedict at the head of the table, who looks deep in conversation with his eldest brothers, almost like he knows what his mother is saying and wants to look very much otherwise occupied to avoid the topic.
“I KNEW IT!” you exclaim quietly. “He keeps saying things like ‘Oh, I hope this doesn’t become a habit’... I just knew there was something he was not telling me,” you shake your head as Violet continues giggling in sympathy. “How on earth did you get him to stop?!” You quiz with a touch of desperation.
“He grew out of it,” she shrugs, reaching over to pat your hand, “I'm certain Thomas will too.”
“And in the meantime, I just need to accept this will happen?!” you decry.
“Or a stronger lock on the nursery door,” Violet suggests, giggling louder.
Just then, Benedict glances down the length of the table to you; you shoot him a look of daggers that makes his brow knit in confusion.
_____
“What was that look for?” Benedict asks as you guide your guests into the parlour after dinner.
“Thomas. It's all your fault, this nudity thing,” you scowl.
He has the decency to look contrite. “Mother said something?” he guesses, looking sheepish, folding his lips under his teeth and averting his eyes. 
“Yes, she did,” you volley, “why did you not inform me?”
“I did not think such things would be inherited!” he argues defensively.
“Well, I need you to think back. What would have stopped you from doing this when you were a child? Your mother seems to be under the impression nothing can be done. That we should merely wait for him to grow out of such behaviour….”
“I… was three… I honestly cannot recall,” he confesses.
You sigh. “Fine, but next time this happens? It is all upon you, husband.” You raise an eyebrow indicating the finality of your opinion on this topic.
“Understood.” he nods, chastened.
_____
The following day you are all gathered around the lake, having a relaxed afternoon watching the children all playing together spiritedly - Simon and Daphne’s, Kate and Anthony's, as well as your own.
Isobel and Amelia tag out of the games and come to sit with you under a parasol with Violet.
“Hello, darlings,” you kiss them both on the head as they snuggle against you, panting a little from their gameplaying, reaching gratefully for the glasses of water laid out for them on the little table behind.
“Mummy,” Amelia begins, “why did Daddy just give Thomas bonbons and tell him he can have more if he keeps his clothes on?”
Out of the corner of your eye, you can already see Violet shaking with laughter behind the back of her hand.
“He did what?!” you cannot prevent your outburst.
“It is bribery, Amelia,” Isobel pipes up, ever your family’s straight-talking lawyer.
“If I take off my clothes, do I get more bonbons, Mummy?” she asks, twisting to look up at you with fluttering eyelids.
“Most certainly not!” you scoff. “Girls, please remain with your grandmother here,” you add, brushing your dress and going to stand up.
“BENEDICT BRIDGERTON!!!” you yell sternly, striding purposefully towards him, your irritation barely contained. 
As you walk through the assembled family, they all move aside, smirking, already knowing what is about to happen. If there is one thing the Brigerton men are known for, it's their spirited wives.
“Now, ladies,” Violet leans in to whisper with her granddaughters, “pay great heed to your mother. If there is one thing that a man must know, it's when he has done something unacceptable to his wife.”
“Daddy said he likes it when Mummy tells him off,” Amelia answers, between gulps of water, watching you remonstrate with Benedict as he looks suitably chastised.
“When did he say that?” Violet inquiries intrigued.
“I heard him say it once when they were in bed and wrestling noisily,” Amelia sighs, matter-of-fact.
Violet turns bright red and almost chokes on her tea.
“I had left the nursery to ask for biscuits when Nanny Abigail was sleeping, but they didn't hear me, so I just went and got some from the kitchen myself,” Amelia continues, finishing her story with a shrug.
“The lock on the nursery is broken, by the way, grandmama,” Isobel adds, as if sensing this is the right time to announce such a thing.
Just then, Thomas wanders over, fully clothed for once. “Grandmama, more bonbons, please?” he grins toothily, nodding to the glass jar next to her, his eyes so hopeful.
Some family moments are very entertaining indeed.
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Benedict taglist: @makaylan @foreverlonginguniverse @iboopedyournose @colettebronte @aintnuthinbutahounddog @severewobblerlightdragon @margofiore @writergirl-2001 @heeyyyou @enichole445 @enchantedbytomandhenry @ambitionspassionscoffee @chaoticcalzoneranchsports @nikaprincessofkattegat @baebee35 @crowleysqueenofhell @bridgertontess @fiction-is-life @lilacbeesworld @angels17324 @broooookiecrisp @queen-of-the-misfit-toys @eleanor-bradstreet @divaanya @musicismyoxygen84 @benedictspaintbrush @miindfucked @sorryallonsy @lilithseve @cayt0123 @hottytoddyhistory @truly-dionysus @fictionalmenloversblog @zinzysstuff @malpalgalz @panhoeofmanyfandoms @kinokomoonshine @causeimissu @delehosies @Mlovesbridgerton @m-rae23 @last-sheep @kmc1989 @desert-fern @starkeylover@corpseoftrees-queen @jeanfreau @magical-spit
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mayullla · 1 year ago
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Title: Little Sunshine!
Characters: Douma (/Doma) (Demon Slayer)
Summary: You were taken into the Paradise Faith cult with Kotoha (Inosuke's mother.) And like her, Douma became rather fond of you. When Kotoha ran away, she had no choice but to leave you behind as Douma hid the truth away from you and turned you into one of his own kind.
Warnings/tags: Platonic yandere, fem!child!reader, the reader gets turned into a demon (drinking blood is mentioned here / forced), manipulation
Note: Part 2 is here!
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You were holding the hand of Kotoha Hashibira, a pregnant woman who brought you along with her when she was welcomed into the Paradise Faith cult.
You were around 3 to 4 years old that time, if Douma remembers correctly when you walked in curiously looking at everything around you so naively and sweetly asking Kotoha who these people welcoming you and her were.
If he was right, Douma remembers that you didn't belong to Kotoha. That two of you weren't blood-related, but she picked you up somewhere as she found you abandoned and alone. It was a common occurrence, no doubt, that kids get abandoned by their own parents. Maybe it was due to poverty or maybe for other reasons but Kotoha told Douma that was hard to ignore you as you look at the world with something in your eyes. Something that she could not pinpoint.
Yet Douma definitely found something common between you and Kotoha, these cheerful and innocent personalities that the two of you have. The two of you would always play together, as you followed along when Kotoha sang or times when you played alone but always invited him to join you when you noticed him.
Even now after years you still do the same, as you toss the ball high up into the air and then catch it the servants watching from far away clapping their hands and they look fondly at you the daughter of Douma having but age only one year after so long.
"Dear," Douma stated, gesturing that you come to him. Looking up from your ball, you trotted over to him, tilting your head curiously. Sometimes you remind him of how he fondly looked at you and Kotoha, the days when he would watch you play around and laugh in delight trying to ask him to carry you as you looked at the koi fish inside the pond. Your eyes were innocent even years later, but then again, you sleep more than before, so maybe mentally, you wouldn't age as much...
"Ah, my lovely child, you are awake! Why didn't you tell me so? I would have come sooner." Douma stated, patting your head. While it has been made this idea that you and Douma were father and daughter, it couldn't have been far from the truth.
It was a public ritual that had been made between you and Douma. The followers envied you, a small child who was forced to drink the blood that came from Douma's hand sliced with a knife and poured into a small cup. It seemed that you didn't remember such a situation occurring as he once brought it up only to get a confused look from you.
You cried so much that day when you were forced to drink from the cup, as the followers all held you down, telling you that you should be grateful and happy that you have been given this honor. That you and Douma would now be related, and there was nothing more privilege than to be related to the man who they worshipped.
With a smile, Douma continued to watch. Your body wanted to curl as you felt the pain in your body as if thorns were stabbed everywhere. Maybe this wouldn't have happened... maybe you would have stayed a human for a long time till you died as one if Kotoha hadn't found out about his little secret.
He remembered when Kotoha tried to run away, she wanted to get you too, but with Inosuke in her arms and him on the way she wasn't able to do so.
Your cries of pain were what he listened to as he thought about the past.
"Where is Kotoha-san and Inosuke?" You asked one night after searching the whole day for them.
"They have left, dear child." Douma smiled down at you, his face covered by the shadow made by the moonlight. His eyes glowed brightly as he watched your reaction to the news. "Oh... are they coming back?" You asked, looking down at the floor fidgeting in your spot. "I am not sure, dear..." Douma replied, watching.
How confused you were, then a sort of realization, then betrayed, sorrow, acceptance, and lastly, loneliness. He enjoyed watching your emotions very much, how expressive your eyes were, a smile still on his face. He wondered what you would do next. Would you curl up in a corner and hide away mopping that you have been abandoned once again, or would you just cry here screaming why?
"Will you stay with me?" Your question almost barely a whisper surprised Douma, as his eyes widen, and somewhere in his body jumped at your words.
It was unfamiliar to him. He wasn't able to reply as silence draped through the room. You stared at him with a cautious hope that started to dim little by little every second he didn't answer.
"Yes.." That word surprised Douma a lot, such a common word held an unfamiliar, heavy feeling that he never thought he would experience. Covering his mouth with his fingers as he wondered if he really was the one who said it. Looking at you, he saw your eyes just light up just a little, and as you smiled.
It was at that moment he thought that his heartbeat, or whatever similar thing there was for a demon. But other than that, there was something else he noticed in his heart, one he could not recognize at all. Yet he thought it was such an erratic, crazed feeling. It was almost addictive.
Douma thought that maybe through you, he might... might just be able to experience these emotions that he never thought he could. The feeling of just being a little more... real.
It was his own amusement that led to the decision to turn you into a demon just like him. When he had done just a good amount of work for Muzan when he asked for a little prize for his work. Mozan stared at him with disdain when he had asked, wondering if he had gone crazy. But to get him out of his sight, Muzan let him do as he pleases, allowing you to become a demon.
Douma watched as you cried your eyes out in pain. Your eyes ever so slowly became more and more crazed. The want for blood you crave would be soon as you tried to find someone to eat, yet Douma noticed how you also looked as if another side of you was fighting. Not wanting to spill blood, as tears fell from your eyes begging yourself to stop.
Instead of eating a human, before Douma could even call for one and offer that dish to you. You passed out.
How... boring... he thought as he stared at you, poking your cheek.
You slept for a long time. A few months or more, he didn't count. Douma sent you to another room to be cared for by the worshippers and almost have completely forgotten about you tired of waiting after a while.
When Douma had asked Muzan about turning a child into a demon, almost all the upper-rank demons were there then. Akaza wondered what has gotten into Douma to ask such a thing but it wasn't like he once understood the guy. So did the other demons they all looked at Douma as if he went insane.
Douma didn't care. He didn't really care what they thought of him, but imagine his surprise when he after a year saw you with Akaza. You were laughing cheerfully as the man carried you on his shoulders. His face was a little confused, but letting you do as you please as you raved about how high up you were. He watched as the smile on Akaza's lips became a little more genuine as he continued to play with you.
... it was a dirty feeling, ugly and disgusting that he wanted to vomit out. It felt like he was drowning in thick mud as he watched you play with Akaza. Just a year ago, he was the one to do this for you.
And he doesn't know why...
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Note: I think it was really obvious to those who follow me that I would pick writing demons rather than the demon slayers... hehe
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fancyfeathers · 9 months ago
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Ngl im very Interested in that au with Zhongli,what If Reader accidentally was affectionate with him? And than she be Like „that was on accident dont think about me being affectionate with you“ and Zhongli just smiles gently.
You sat at the edge of of water of the ponds at Yujing Terrace, you leaned over the edge your hand petting the fish that swam by. With your domain being related with water the creatures of the water never feared you, your husband was another story.
“May I ask what are you doing, my love?”
Seems like your husband finished his business at Bubu Pharmacy. You did not look at him, your eyes fixated on the fish that were fighting for your attention. You know your husband is not a fan of what lays in the water, unlike you, needless to say this effected you. There was a time, centuries ago, when you went swimming in the waters of what would one day be Liyue Harbor, and when you came out he was in a panic and rage, panicked that you could have been hurt, and in rage that you may have run away. But nothing that calls the water it’s home would ever hurt you, or dare to try.
“I’m petting them, perhaps you would learn a thing or two if you tried something new.”
“Hm… very well then.”
You only looked at him when he shrugged off his coat and rolled up his sleeves and came to kneel down next to you, and he reached down into your water. The moment his hand broke through the surface of the water the fish all swam away, almost like they were running away.
“Not so quickly, you’re scaring them.” You corrected him before grabbing his hand and guiding it to touch the scales of the closest fish. The fish jumped at first but brushed against Zhongli’s hand willingly, which drew a chuckle from your husband as you smiled. “See she likes you.”
“She?”
“Yes, she. Look at the pattern of her scales.” As you were pointing them out you noticed it, you were holding his hand. As his thumb brushed against your palm you harshly snapped it back and with some what intentionally splashed water in his face. You stood up, turning your cold shoulder to him again. “We should go, it’s getting late.”
Zhongli hummed as he stood up, grabbing his jacket and putting back on, and out of the corner of your eye you can see that smile of his, the one he gets when you give him the tiniest bit of affection.
“Very well, my love.”
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natashaslesbian · 2 months ago
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We Saved Each Other (Part Ten)
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It’s your first birthday with your new mama, unfortunately it doesn’t go to plan
Word Count: 2.7k
Content: Autistic Meltdown
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“A little to the left” Natasha guided Clint in hanging up yet another banner. “I’ve tied all the balloons up” Maria called as she came into the room. Today was your 7th birthday and Natasha had promised it would be a day to remember. You had never celebrated your birthday having grown up in the red room and with a father who didn’t care, it was something Natasha had been excited about since she adopted you last year. Your day so far had been filled with breakfast in bed, a few presents and now you were at the zoo with auntie Laura and your cousins, Lila and Cooper (and you were very excited that Laura was expecting another baby). You had begged your mama to come with you but she told you she had paper work that needed to be done. Little did you know, Natasha had sent you on a trip in order to decorate your house for a surprise party. After living in the Barton’s barn for a few months, Nat found an adorable cottage in the countryside. You loved your new house, it was perched on a small hill and overlooked fields filled with sheeps and horses. The back garden had a small pond and you’re favourite part of the day was feeding the fish and having Natasha push you super high on the swings. It was the perfect hideaway when the avengers tower got too much, it had been especially crazy since the organisation had formed a few short months ago.
You were currently waiting in line to feed the alpacas, something you had been talking about non stop all day. The line was moving quickly and you could hardly wait “Auntie Laura is it my turn next?” You asked excitedly. “I think so birthday girl, you ready?” Laura asked as she guided you forward, you nodded excitedly as you grabbed your bowl of grass. “Here we go then, lift up some food for them” your auntie leaded you. you smiled widely as one of the alpacas came over to munch on some grass “look Lila!” You cheered as you twisted to see your cousin. In turning your back you accidentally moved the bowl away from the alpaca, making it harder for him to grab some grass. Not thinking anything was wrong, you turned around with your big rosy cheeks and came face to face with an angry alpaca who immediately spat roughly in your face. You screamed loudly as the goo landed on your face “auntie Laura!” You yelled as you dropped the bowl into the pen, distracting the alpacas. “It’s okay sweetie he just got a little angry” Laura said as she lifted you off the small podium you were placed upon. “Get it off me!” You sobbed as your hands began to flap, the first sign that your autism was starting to take over.
Back at home, Natasha was adding the final touches to your decorated house. There were banners on every wall and balloons filled the hallway. Maria was finishing decorating your cake when Clint came running in with his phone held to his ear “Nat, we need to go get y/n” he said breathlessly. Natasha dropped everything as she came to talk to Clint “what’s happened?” She said in a panicked voice, a million thoughts racing behind her eyes. “Some animal spat on her she’s having a meltdown” Clint said as he guided Nat towards the door, the two didn’t waste a second as they climbed into the car and headed to the zoo. “I knew this was a bad idea” Natasha sighed “she’s been so overwhelmed lately I should’ve just suggested the park or something I just wanted today to be special for her” she said in a panicked quickness. “Breathe Nat” Clint said as he placed a comforting hand on his friends shoulder “she’s got her coping mechanisms right?” He asked. “Yeah but she’s never had to use them without me there, she’s never had a meltdown without me, I should’ve gone with her Clint” Natasha mumbled as her eyes filled with tears. “She’ll be okay, she always bounces back, just like her mom” Clint smiled as he consoled Natasha.
Peoples heads were starting to turn at the zoo, some in understanding and some in annoyance. Lila and cooper stood back as they watched their mom try to comfort their dear cousin. Lila still didn’t really understand why you got so upset at what she felt was a tiny problem but Cooper was slowly learning how to help and interact with you. “Where’s mommy!” You cried as you gripped onto Laura’s sweatshirt “she’s on her way y/n okay, deep breaths sweetheart” Laura said. Your knuckles were starting to turn white at the sheer force of your grip, the material being twisted and pulled in between your fingers. Laura had attempted to get you to count to 10, tried the ‘5, 4, 3, 2, 1’ method but so far nothing had calmed you. “Mommy look it’s daddy and auntie Nat!” Lila called as she saw Clint’s car pull into the car park, pointing over with a wide smile. “Y/n hey, look who’s here” Laura cooed, trying to get your focus onto Natasha. The widow came rushing over when she saw your state, pushing past the small crowd of people who had gathered. “Can you give her some space please?” Clint said to all the bystanders. “Y/n baby!” Natasha called as she came over to you, you ran straight into her arms when you heard her voice. “Mama I don’t like it” you sobbed into her arms “I know sweetie it’s ok mommy’s here” Natasha said as she squeezed you with all her might, something she learned early on helped to ground you.
You couldn’t quite remember the actual events that happened next but in your next moment of consciousness you felt the familiar beanbag underneath you and the weight of your blanket was wrapping around you perfectly. You peaked out through your half opened eyes and realised you were at the tower. Your mom had created four calm spaces for you at your most visited locations, your house, Clint’s house, the avengers tower and S.H.I.E.L.D HQ. You opened your eyes fully when you realised it was dim, small lava lamps illuminated the corners of the room just how you liked it. The black out curtains were pulled tightly shut and all the electronics had been unplugged (Natasha spent weeks looking for a battery powered lava lamp). You saw a flash of red hair in the corner of your eyes and were immediately calmed by the presence of your mother. Noticing you were awake, Natasha slowly made her way over to you, sitting close by but far enough away. She began to sign slowly, something Clint was teaching the both of you for when you needed absolute silence. Taking her time to get it right, Natasha signed for ‘voice’ and you nodded slowly letting her know it was okay to talk. “Hi baby” she whispered “is there anything in the room that needs to be adjusted?” She asked. You looked around the room quickly and shook your head no. “Do you want touch right now?” Your mom said, you nodded quickly and reached out for your mom.
Still wrapped up in your weighted blanket, Natasha gently picked you up and sat you on her lap atop the beanbag. She swayed slowly as she held you close, adding the perfect amount of pressure. “You’re not having the best of birthdays are you baby girl?” Natasha said. “No” you mumbled quietly, rubbing your face against the bare skin above Nats t shirt. Your mom pulled her shirt over her head, cooing gently when you whined at the brief loss of contact. You settled again instantly at the feeling of her soft chest. “I think I have something that might make it a bit better, if you want it?” Natasha said as she pulled you close. “What is it?” You asked sceptically looking up at your mom through your eyelashes “well it’s a very special present I got for you” she said as she shifted you in her arms. Now perched comfortably on your mamas knee, you questioned her further on this special present “why is it special?” You asked. “Because it’s more than a present, it’s something mommy has been thinking about getting you for a long time. I think he’s gonna make you really happy” Natasha said. “He?” You asked inquisitively “is it a person mama?” You said. “Not quite, shall we go and find out?” Nat asked. “Yes please” you said as you wrapped your legs your moms waist and held on tight behind her neck.
Natasha made sure you had fully adjusted to the light before she walked down the hall with you on her hip, after pulling her shirt back over her head. She’d given you a fidget toy to help soothe you further, the worst of your meltdown had passed but she wanted to keep you from going backwards into another one. It was a Saturday so the tower was quiet, the avengers floor practically silent, the crew cleaning up after the attack on New York didn’t work weekends either. You passed through the empty halls unfazed and happily stimming with your fidget snake, only when you heard a familiar voice did you look up from your hands. “Hey little spider” Clint said when you smiled wildly at him “are you feeling better?” He asked. You nodded slowly and made grabby hands towards him, wanting to feel the softness of the familiar sweatshirt he was wearing. You settled in his arms until a sharp bark took you by surprise, you covered your ears at the sudden noise but quickly calmed and flashed an inquisitive look at your mom. “What did you hear baby?” Natasha asked you with a wide smile. “A woof woof” you said questioningly “is there a doggy?” You asked as you scrambled out of Clint’s arms to investigate. “Why don’t we go and see where the woof woof came from?” Your mom said as she took a hold of your hand.
You tip toed down the corridor, listening intensely for another sound, particularly a bark. “It’s coming from in here mama!” You beamed as you came to the avengers common room. “Maybe you should go and have a look” Clint said as he pushed down on the handle. Natasha nodded as she encouraged you to enter the room, you walked in slowly to the dimly lit space. Looking up to your right you saw a pink balloon gently flowing around the room. “A balloon mommy” you said as you jogged slowly around the couch. Your eyes went wide when you saw a fluffy grey husky sitting beside the coffee table “a doggy!” You exclaimed as you looked down into the bright blue eyes of the feline “look little spider he has a note with him!” Clint said, pointing towards the folded card on the table. You ran towards it and picked it up to have a look, it read:
‘Hi y/n. My name is Joey. I’m a special doggy to help you with your autism. I am really friendly and will help you need me’
You finished reading and looked back at Natasha “he’s for me mommy?” You asked. “He is” your mom said as she crouched down beside you, calling Joey over to you both “he’s specially trained to look after you when you get overwhelmed” Natasha said as she gently brushed through the dogs hair. You cautiously placed your hand out for Joey to inspect and he wagged his tail excitedly when he sniffed your fingers “he’s funny” you giggled when Joey came up to lick your face, the gentle strokes of his tongue and his soft fur soothing you. “I think he likes you” Natasha said as she released her hold on Joeys collar, she was delighted when he came to sit at your feet and looked up at you with his adoring eyes. “I like him too mommy, can he sleep in my room?” You begged. “Of course, he’s your special doggy y/n, so he can always stay with you. He’ll always be there if you need him, he can tell when you’re upset so he’ll come and help you and he can alert me if you need mamas help” Natasha explained. “Thank you mommy! I love him so much!” You shrieked as you ran into Natasha’s arms.
Nat stood back as she watched you play with Joey, he was so gentle with you that it brought a lump to her throat. Clint wrapped an arm around his best friends shoulder as he watched on too. “I think they’ll be best friends in no time” he said. Clint had spent months helping Natasha research for therapy animals and he’d taken her to all the meetings. Natasha knew as soon as she met Joey that he was the perfect dog for you and after making sure he was fully trained, she couldn’t wait to bring him home. “I’m guessing the party’s off?” Clint asked as he stepped back. Natasha watched you run around happily while Joey chased your balloon. “I think the party’s right here.”
10 years later.
“Sit Joey” you said as you called your husky to your side “good boy” you praised as you slipped him a treat. Natasha came around the side of your truck after securing the last of your boxes. “You’re all set” she said with a slight quiver in her voice. “Mama don’t cry again” you laughed as you pulled the redhead into your arms. “I can’t help it” Natasha said as she took your face into her hands “my grown up baby girl, off to college. Have I told you that I’m so proud of you” Your mom smiled. “Many times mama” you said as you lent your forehead against Natasha’s. Joey whined at the lack of attention and Nat crouched down to stroke him “oh Joey I’m gonna miss you too. The house is gonna be so quiet without you stomping around” she giggled. You took a glance up at your house, remembering all of the memories you never thought you would have. Natasha had made up for every year of love you were deprived of and along the way you found yourself the best family in the world.
Clint and Laura also cried the day you got accepted into Harvard and Tony threw you the biggest going away party, abiding closely by the many rules Natasha had set to make sure you were comfortable. Yelena was gutted that you two wouldn’t be able to take Joey and Fanny for their doggy play dates. After you, your mom and Yelena had taken down the red room, you had gotten so close with your auntie you couldn’t imagine life without her. But she had promised to face time very day, though you knew it would just be to talk to Joey. You never thought you’d be doing this, leaving your family, going to college. There was a time when you thought your life would only ever be spying and killing, but as soon as Natasha came along you knew you’d be okay. She’d been there through it all. Holding you after every nightmare. Being by your side during each meltdown. Comforting you when the PTSD hit in your teenage years. She’d given you the life you never thought you would have.
Opening the door swiftly, you guided Joey up into the truck, making sure his tail was tucked away before closing the car door. “I gotta get going” you frowned. Natasha lifted your chin with her manicured fingers. “Hey, you know I’m always with you, wherever you are. If you need me, you call me and I’ll be there in seconds. It’s time for you to live your life y/n” she said as she gently ran her fingers through your hair. “You’ve already helped me to live my life mommy. I love you so much. You saved me” you cried softly. “Oh baby” Natasha said as she looked into your eyes “we saved each other”
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And that’s it! The end of the WSEO series. Thank you for all the support on this story!🤍
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Taglist<3
@saraaahsstuff / @dannipotatoo / @tobiaslut / @nevaeh-daughterofvalcarol / @marvelnatasha12346 / @yelenasdiary / @mousetheorist / @ashadash0904 / @strange-night-owl / @kkreader78o / @hatergirl-69 / @asv-xx
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idkfitememate · 11 months ago
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Idk if it's obvious or not but I love the boar!creator so much! Could you possibly do one where they spend time with klee going fish blasting (fish blasting™ is not jean approved) and they run into razor? I really want to see what razor thinks of fish blasting :D then maybe we could get a little more andrius content? Ahh this is just such a cool concept!
Fish Blasting With Friends
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૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა Pairings : GN! Boar Reader x Klee & Razor
૮꒰ྀི∩´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა W.K. : 542
໒꒰ྀིᵔ ᵕ ᵔ ꒱ྀི১ Tags/CW&TW : Fluff & Crack
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Being surrounded on all sides by wolves was an amazing feeling.
The warmth, the fuzziness, the feeling of Razor’s hands running up and down your spine. Knowing Andrius was just a snort away.~
Yes life was good.
*BOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMM*
…Uh oh.
Klee.
You jumped up, making Razor flinch. You immediately apologized with a small huff to his face, which made him giggle. You tried to get out of the pile, only to be picked up by a certain blue wolf. You allowed yourself to be carried like a cub by the wind spirit. You also noted that Razor had climbed on Andrius’s back.
Now you’d have to witnesses. Neato.
As the three of you wondered out of the Wolvendom, you immediately found the child solider at a nearby pound. Blowing it sky fucking high.
You struggled out of the larger’s maw and ran towards the child, snorting the whole way. She must’ve heard your steps because she turned around immediately and gasped.
“Boar-boar! Razor! Mr. Andrius!” She said with the cutest smile agh your heart-
You ran up and nuzzled against her and she hugged you back. Andrius bounded over and let Razor off his back. Noticing this you rush back, grab his pants, and pull him towards the lake, Andrius chuckling.
“Would you like to fish blast with me!” Klee asked, Razor looked confused and you urged her to continue.
“Oh! Fish blasting is when we blast fish! Like this!” She summoned a bomb and threw it into the pound, the water bursting towards the sky was the explosive beneath the surface exploded.
Razor watched as fish flew through the air, some landing on the ground and some landed back in the water. He glanced at you and you looked… well you looked more than happy to be here.
He nodded and Klee bounced in joy, stepping aside so he could take his turn. Summoning his blade, he slung the weapon into the water after charging in, causing the pond to erupt into a brilliant purple.
Both you and Klee awed at the sight, and cater it was done Klee ran and jumped up to give Razor a hug, completing him over and over for his skill.
And now it was your turn.
You back up, before running up and jumping into the pool. The duo looked into the water…
Before it exploded upwards in a supercharged explosion! Fire and electricity danced with each other in the air and the smell of singed fish filled their noses.
Soon enough - after the water fell back into the pound - you crawled out, your fur drenched and you wagging your tail at the accomplishment.
“WOW!!! THAT WAS SO SUPER DUPER AMAZING BOAR-BOAR!!” Klee cried. She ran to you and hugged you hard.
“…That was… cool..” Razor said. He was still a bit start struck from the display, but he was able to bring himself to running a hand through your fur.
You looked for Andrius to see if he’d give you a compliment… only to see him eating the singed fish. You both made eye contact.
And you burst out into snort laughter. Rolling in your side, Klee and a Razor also began to laugh.
Today, was a good day.
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໒꒰ྀི˶˙Ⱉ˙˶꒱ྀིა Author’s note : Mmm fish blasting with Klee. I wanna do that so bad- MMMM WHY CANT KLEE BE REAL
૮꒰ ˶꒦ິ꒳꒦ິ˶꒱ა♡-
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teyamsilly · 1 year ago
Text
YOUNGEST SULLY ii
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summary the youngest daughter of the sully family is just two years younger than tuk. just how the sully family treats her!
pairing sully! reader x platonic! sully family
note this is not proof-read!
a/n it's been months since i paid attention to my stories lmao. i'm so sorry for the late post! i hope this is good enough for all of you
part one | part two
jake shared a special moment with each of his children, and he wants to make one with you
out of the siblings in their younger years, you are the most adventurous, even more than lo'ak
you had the knack of throwing everything everywhere and jake wanted to turn that into a hobby
what's better than archery?
jake brought you to a small pond that he brought neteyam when he was just younger. now that he's fifteen, he's more focused on his warrior duties. although they are small, neteyam always exceeded in his tasks. he secretly hoped that you shared the same passion as your big brother.
"daddy, look! this fish has blue and green on it's skin!" you exclaimed, your face nearing the water.
"that's beautiful," he smiled. jake made sure to note what the fish looked like to avoid hitting it with the arrow. just as he was about move closer, all the arrows he had on his arms fell on the ground. groaning, he picked them up. "so, sweetie. here's the plan for today…"
jake began explaining without even taking a glance at you
you were fascinated with the fish, until you weren't
the sounds of leaves ruslting in the forest made your ear twitch, looking at your father to see if he recognised it, but he didn't
you pondered over your decision if you should follow it and alert your dad, but you knew he would say no
you learned a lot from your big brother, lo'ak. he says, "dad will always say no, so learn how to do things secretly."
jake continued to explain the basics of archery. of course, he told you how archery was your mother's and neteyam's forte and how it could become yours too— he wishes you do. "you ready, babygirl?" he asked with a grin presented on his face, however, it quickly vanished when you weren't there.
"y/n?" jake yelled, running through the forest. 
he trailed back to the path the two of you used, but you weren't there. the area close to the lake was clear too. distraught, he gripped his dread locks. where could you have possibly gone? or perhaps someone took you at his vulnerable moment? what if something happened to you? oh, jake wouldn't be able to forgive himself.
jake then ultimately decided to get back home to inform neytiri about what's happened, and then call his warriors to go do a search for you. just as he was about to turn back, the sound of your giggles caused his ears to perk up. he quickly rushed to the direction he heard your voice.
"y/n!" he called again. 
"daddy!" 
jake assumed, from your heartily laughs, that you found something intriguing again
like a flower with colours that you have never seen, or a baby pa'li that lost his mother and you brought it home with you to make it a family pet (jake had to make a dramatic story about how it left because you didn't want to let it go)
but to his horror, you were playing with a palulukan
he stood frozen in his place as the palulukan guarded you from him, hissing
"y/n, come here."
you furrowed your eyebrows. "but, why? it's luka!"
it was jake's turn to look at you with confusion. "a what?"
"luka!" you groaned and rolled your eyes like it was supposed to be the easiest thing known to pandora. "he found me days ago when i went to the forest alone."
"you went to the forest alone?"
you nodded proudly. "uh-huh! when no one was watching!"
it took a while for luka, the palulukan, to let his guard down around jake
apparently, you created the bond with luka a few days ago
you didn't think it would be a big deal. you've seen your mom and dad bond with creatures, why can't you?
jake started to regret describing palulukan as creatures who only acts to defend themselves in a heroic way to you because who knew you would bond with one?
he's just glad that you were safe
when jake finally convinced you it was time to go, you hugged luka by the head and he only nodded his head
the plan he had now were long forgotten, the first thing he wanted to do was tell neytiri how their youngest daughter, who was only 5 years old, tamed a palulukan
their little palulukan makto <3
neytiri never imagined having a big family
she thought that she would stop with two children, but as her children grew, she realised that she wanted more until she didn't
five was already enough for her
each of her children had distinguished personalities that separate themselves
neteyam is responsible and composed. truly what the eldest should be
kiri is connected to everything around her, yet she could be mischevious at times
lo'ak is famous for his rebellious attitude
tuk is charming and funny, well expected for her age
but you, however, are different. you were a well mix of your older siblings. you could be responsible sometimes, scolding tuk and even lo'ak for the things they did. you tamed a palulukan at a young age! and you love walking around the forest, something kiri loves to do everyday. most of the time, you would engage lo'ak in his activities and get scolded by your father together. and tuk, she's your partner in crime.
neytiri thanks the great mother every night for the family she received
"mama," your small and soft voice calls for her.
neytiri hummed, her eyes staying on the top she's weaving for you. recently, you complained about your top being old and repetitive, so she decided to make you a new one. 
neteyam and lo'ak were out with jake for warrior duties, kiri was with mo'at for her tsakarem duties, and tuk was with her bestfriend. you didn't feel like playing with anyone, and stayed at home with your mother.
"i want to be like you when i grow up."
"is that so, little one?" neytiri smiled.
"yeah! i want to be a mother."
neytiri's eyes widened, instantly her gaze left the work from her hands and to you. you were smiling up at her innocently. she thought that when you said you wanted to be like her, she assumed that it would be a great hunter.
"a mother?" she repeated, still flabbergasted. "why is that?"
"because it's beautiful, don't you think? you and papa raised us, we turned out great. neteyam's recognised as a promising future olo'eyktan, kiri is connected to Eywa than grandma, lo'ak's outgoing nature makes him easy to talk to, and tuk makes anyone feel special. i want to raise a family as great as ours, mama! but maybe it's because you did a good job though…" you trailed off. "doesn't matter! i'll do a good job too!"
neytiri only watched you with tears welling in her eyes
of course, she knew she did a good job. she sees it everyday and was told by jake with any opportunity he gets
but to hear it from one of your children, moreso youngest? 
you paused when a tear fell from your mother's eyes, trickling down her cheek
"mama, is everything okay-"
neytiri placed her hand on the side of your head, smiling fondly, her thumb brushing your temple. "you have grown too fast," she whispered. she leaned closer and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead.
you smiled brightly at the action. "did i grow taller?"
neytiri laughed, "oh, yes. really tall."
"do you think i would grow as tall as neteyam?"
and one by one, her children came back to their home
neteyam and lo'ak were first. tired from their duties, lo'ak didn't waste his time to sleep on his mat while neteyam joined them
kiri and tuk were next. tuk joined the circle and began telling her adventures with her bestfriend today
because of the noise, lo'ak woke up and couldn't go back to sleep. neteyam beckoned him to join them, because he didn't have a choice. he begrudgingly joined the circle
soon, the kids were lively and conversing with one another
neytiri observed them, her smile never leaving her face
she sighed happily, "thank you, great mother."
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