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tarmac-rat · 1 year ago

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Then and Now

I saw a few people in the fandom doing this and I was a bit hesitant to put this together because I started screenshotting comparably late through my timeline-- I didn't have the confidence to attempt it until 1.5, and in some cases I still am a bit resistant to sharing-- but I thought "meh, I haven't talked about Riley and I still have all my old files, let's go back in time". So here's a bit more of an in-depth look into my V's evolution from launch until now:

Click images for better quality.

Version 1-- V1.0 - 1.2

This is probably the most radically different version of Riley I've made. I used different scarring, different facial cyberware, and different eye makeup, though I believe her body, eye, freckle, and earring presets have always been the same. Her chin is squarer and her face is a bit more angled, but back in the day I really enjoyed what I had come up with even if I never took her out for photographing.

The blue hair was darker than I really wanted it to be, but back in 1.0 it was pretty much the only option for light blue so I stuck with it lol. I ended up using the bob solely because I didn't really like 95% of the hairstyles and this was one of the only ones I could tolerate, but I honestly grew to dislike it for her after a while. I hated that it covered up her ears and I never found it really photographed that well because it hung in her eyes.

I actually still really like this facial build-- it doesn't suit Riley but I like how mean it looks, like a built in RBF-- and honestly I would probably try to reuse it for a different OC if I ever made one.

Version 2-- V1.2 - 1.4

This was the new version I built for another run-through on 1.2 and serves as the bridge between the original Riley and the current Riley. I switched the scars and the facial cyberware out to what I would eventually end up sticking with, but I still stubbornly stuck with the bob and somehow I made her face....softer? That wasn't my intention but her whole face has lost the bite it originally had-- I always refer to this version as my "Valley Girl" preset because idk I just always imagine that drawl coming out of this face.

Looking back on it I hate her lip preset on this face. IDK why they look so pink bc I don't have lip makeup on (I literally checked when taking the photos) but UGH they're just not a good fit for her they make her look too...is it mean of me to say "too happy"?

Yeah this one in hindsight is my least favorite it just doesn't look good on her based on what was I going for. Feel like I missed the mark big time.

I don't know why I added that neck tattoo lol it was spur of the moment.

Version 3-- V1.5 - 1.6

Current Riley! Remade during 1.5 when 1) I wanted to finally make a V I could screenshot and 2) we got the new cosmetics and finally got light electric-blue hair I always envisioned her having.

Finally buckled down and spent more than 15 minutes in the character creator. oven so I could properly sculpt her face. Got rid of the softness, gave her a bit more angles and a bigger nose, lightened her freckles a bit, gave her thicker eyebrows. AND I DITCHED THE BOB. BYE BOB GET OUTTA HERE.

Also finally got the chance to show off her ears-- bronze was another new preset added into 1.5 so that's what I chose, but I believe before that update all her piercings had been silver.

The one thing I wished I had done was give her a bit of a broader nose, but overall I'm pretty happy with this design and I've used it for over a year now.

I've always claimed that my V is about 55-60% accurate to how I imagined her because there's just so much I can't add in vanilla basegame, but this is probably as close as we can get with what I've been given haha.

Bonus: Below are first ever photos I took when I finally mustered the confidence to use my XBone screenshotter around the 1.5 drop. Vanilla definitely has it's limits, but I can at least say I've improved from my starting point-- definitely enough to know what decent lighting is:

#Cyberpunk 2077 #CP2077 #V #My V #Riley Aldana #Long Post #God that second build ages like sour milk the more I look at it #It REALLY does not suit her Idk what I was on back in June 2021 but whatever it is please keep it away from me again #We also won't talk about her 30 minute stint with the short mohawk it was a different time and it ain't like that no more lol #Aldi speaks

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brianamorganbooks · 2 years ago

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Title: "Eleven"

Short Stories | Novels | Novellas | Plays | Other

Queer Horror

How far would you go to see a dead loved one again?

Kayla discovers a chilling Internet game that might let her see her dead girlfriend and give her one last kiss... as long as she follows the rules.

TW: Grief, death of a loved one, drug and suicide mentions, overdose mention, blood, vomit mention, religion mentions

Kayla opened her car door to the reek of gas fumes and the sounds of people arguing. For a moment, she hesitated right outside the car. As far as she could tell, no one was yelling at her. She hunched as she approached the gas pump, shoulders rising around her ears as she kept her head down.

The gas pump clicked as Kayla filled her Toyota Corolla up with gas. Her pulse raced as the numbers climbed, and her hand went to the wallet in her front pocket.

Annoyance pricked the back of Kayla’s neck. She shrugged it off. She would’ve had to get more gas; the game had just pushed her to do it now. Besides, she was better safe than sorry. That was a philosophy she wholeheartedly believed in.

It had taken her so long to go through with this. An entire season had passed since Alexis’s death, and she was only now facing it. Her mental block had lifted enough for Kayla to remember the empty pill bottles, Alexis lying facedown on the bed, a pool of vomit on the pillow—

The click of the gas pump jolted Kayla. The Corolla’s tank was full.

The commotion she’d heard when she arrived died down as the couple returned to their vehicle. Someone blasted Lynyrd Skynyrd as they turned out of the station and peeled off down the road. Kayla’s shoulders rolled back. She sighed.

As she hung the nozzle back up, her stomach growled. Her gaze turned to the convenience store, with its bright fluorescent lights and flashing OPEN sign, glass doors and windows plastered with cigarette ads and information about the lottery. Maybe she should get a snack. Maybe that would help her make it through the night.

But the rules had said nothing about eating.

Kayla swallowed and got in the car. She fastened her seatbelt and sat behind the wheel, staring straight ahead. Every muscle in her body tensed. Her eyes fell shut. Breathe, she thought. She could do this. She had to.

Keep your eyes on the road and drive, Kayla thought. That’s all I have to do. Keep my eyes on the road and remember Alexis.

Before she could second-guess herself any further, Kayla started the car and pulled out of the gas station. She turned onto the road and kept going, trusting her gut or whatever higher power hated her to tell her where to go. According to the rules, she had to look for a road leading into the forest. Also, the road leading in had to go through the forest too. For all Kayla knew, it also had to be at least eleven miles long, but the game would handle that one for her.

Kayla picked at the skin on her cracked lips. Without even music to distract her, the silence only heightened her anxiety. Fear sat in the pit of her stomach like a feral cat, clawing its way into her throat.

Maybe a little music wouldn’t hurt. The game hadn’t started yet.

Her hand leapt to the first radio preset button. “Uptown Girl” sprang from the Corolla’s speakers. Kayla’s mom loved eighties music, and Kayla turned to it whenever she felt lost. She didn’t think she’d ever been more lost than she felt right then. Maybe Billy Joel could soothe her.

Alexis had hated eighties music. Kayla had never learned why. Her favorite decade had been the nineties, which, as far as Kayla thought, sounded the same, albeit darker, grittier, grungier. Maybe that was what had drawn Alexis to it.

If only I’d noticed the signs, Kayla thought, but hadn’t she? Hadn’t she watched the light leave Alexis’s eyes and the spark drop from her body? Hadn’t she felt the fresh scars in places no one else got to see and wondered what more might appear?

And hadn’t she refused to acknowledge the truth for fear her life would unravel?

The wish, she reminded herself. Think about the wish. Hold it in your mind. Keep your eyes on the road and drive now. Don’t stop.

Trees rose on either side of the road. A side street beckoned her. She turned onto it, the turn signal clicking and blinking as she did. The road into the woods wound deep into the trees, which meant it would be perfect for the evening.

She could start the game now.

Instead, she parked and turned the car off. Kayla’s heart thudded against her ribcage. It wasn’t too late to turn back. The game hadn’t started. She still could go home.

But home was where her pillow still had blonde hairs on it, where Alexis’s jacket hung in her closet, still smelling like vanilla and soap. Home was where she could never escape the memory of Alexis, no matter how hard she tried. If she couldn’t go through with this, she couldn’t go home. She’d never be able to forgive herself for letting this opportunity pass.

One chance. One moment. One last kiss. That was what she wanted. She would go through hell or whatever horror lay ahead for the chance to see her girlfriend again.

Her gaze fell on the beaded necklace hanging from her rearview mirror. Alexis had made it for her. She’d done all she could to make Kayla feel special.

Kayla inhaled. She pulled up the mile counter app on her phone, set it to notify her at each mile, and hit “start.” She turned the car on. She exhaled.

Now or never.

The indicator ticked as she turned onto the road. From here on out, she had to keep driving, no matter what happened.

Mile one. She had to keep going for eleven miles, and she couldn’t turn the engine off or leave the car. Those were the rules. All the sources Kayla had considered before coming out here said so, even if they didn’t agree on much else.

The beaded pendant hanging from her rearview mirror swung as she drove. Kayla tried not to watch it.

Truth be told, she wasn't looking forward to what lay ahead. All the firsthand accounts she'd read online and all the speculation had made her more than a little nervous, and for good reason. Some people talked about how good it felt to get their wish, but on most of the forums, all she found was account after account of people who had failed to do the game the right way, or people whom the game had traumatized.

What did they say about mile one? she asked herself. It’s the easiest mile, but something is off. Something should be off as proof that I’ve started the game.

She wanted to check her phone and review the rules again. The last webpage she’d visited had a thorough breakdown of each mile, advising the reader what to expect from the journey ahead. She needed it now.

But she couldn’t turn the engine off, couldn’t get out of the car, couldn’t park it. Not until mile eleven.

The first mile was the easiest. According to the rules, all she had to do was turn her heater on. Since it was November, it was already running. She didn’t have to do anything. Her heart fluttered, and she kept driving. The mile counter pinged.

Mile two. Harder than the first, but Kayla couldn’t see why. She already had her heater on, and as far as she could tell, nothing else was happening. Was something else supposed to happen? She wanted to look at the rules, but she couldn’t stop driving. She had to keep going.

The mile counter pinged again. Kayla took a deep breath and tightened her hold on the steering wheel. Out of the corner of her eye, she glimpsed movement in the trees. Shadows that looked like people. She ignored them.

Kayla took another deep breath. Her pulse steadied, and she relaxed her hands on the steering wheel. Maybe this game was going to be even easier than she thought.

The first four miles seemed like a walk in the park. Kayla felt some of her uneasiness ebb, replaced by fiery determination. She kept thinking about Alexis and how good it would feel to see her again, to touch her, to hold her, to kiss her. Her thoughts consumed her as she drove, and when her phone chimed to announce the end of another mile, she barely heard it.

Mile five. Although she tried not to look around too much, the trees had gone missing. The entire forest had vanished. Somehow, it had all gone without her noticing. Was that supposed to happen, or was it unique to her journey? Not for the first time, she wished she could check her phone, scan the resources she’d collected, but she couldn’t.

She’d read about what could happen if you didn’t follow the rules of the game, but she couldn’t remember the specifics. Anyway, the possibilities her mind dredged up were probably a thousand times worse than what the Internet proclaimed. She pictured herself stopping to check her phone, only for her car to burst into flames. Or maybe she’d slow down, spend too much time looking around, make eye contact with a shadow person. God only knew what could happen to her then. She didn’t want to dwell on it.

Kayla gripped the steering wheel tighter. She checked her surroundings. Light sparkled on the surface of a lake on the right, one that hadn’t been there before. A glance at the moon confirmed it too now glowed brighter. What did any of it mean?

“Kayla.”

The voice sliced through the silence of the car and jolted Kayla from her musings. Maybe she was hearing things.

“Kayla. We are here.”

The voice came again, low and gravelly, followed by a chuckle that raised goosebumps on her skin. She’d forgotten about the voices. How did they know her name?

“We know, we know, we know.”

“We know everything, Kayla,” a high-pitched voice chimed in. “We see you and we hear you. We even know your thoughts.”

A muscle jerked in Kayla’s jaw. She had to keep her hands on the wheel, had to keep driving, had to keep the car moving no matter what. She’d have to ignore the voices, along with whatever else the road threw at her.

“Kayla.”

“Kayla Kayla Kayla.”

“Alexis is here, Kayla. She wants to talk to you.”

“Foolish girl. You can’t win this game.”

“You can’t beat us, Kayla.”

More voices joined, saying crueler things she couldn’t block out. The volume rose to a fever pitch. Slurs, epithets, and curses drowned out everything, even her own thoughts. More than anything, she yearned to stop the car and stop the screaming, but she couldn’t do that. Instead, she gritted her teeth and kept driving.

Mile six. The chime of the phone sent the voices away. Relief washed through Kayla’s body. She’d never been so grateful to sit in silence before.

Out of the corner of her eye, the trees reappeared. She recognized the shapes of the pines and shadowed firs. Their branches dipped and lifted with the wind—a sight she only saw because she’d switched to fully looking at the forest once again. Her hands gripped the wheel, and the car kept moving, but her gaze riveted to the trees.

Kayla…

The gravelly voice returned, but it was just inside her head. She brushed it off like she’d walked through a spiderweb.

Outside the car loomed an impossible darkness, like all the stars had gone out. Maybe they had. Kayla didn’t risk looking up at the sky. If the moon was still there, its glow had diminished.

Headlights flashed and flickered, glaring off the dark asphalt and bright-white lines along the sides. Kayla reached up to adjust the headlights, but no matter how far she twisted or how much she pulled, nothing affected them. They acted like sentient creatures capable of setting their own destinies. The lights continued to go haywire as she drove what she hoped was the last part of the mile.

“… as the end of the world is closer than ever! Hell, damnation, fire for all eternity!”

The radio roared to life, spewing some evangelist’s fire-and-brimstone sermon. Shit, that was the last thing she needed right now. She ran her fingers over the dial and hesitated. Should she turn the radio off? Her gut told her no, so maybe she’d just have to grin and bear the onslaught.

“The LAKE OF FIRE! I SAID, LAKE OF FIRE!”

Like the voices and the headlights, the radio was proof that the game was toying with her, doing all it could to make her break the rules and lose.

Kayla had never been a good loser. She refused to lose this time. So she kept driving.

She couldn’t stop the car. She couldn’t turn off the radio. She couldn’t forget Alexis.

No matter how terrified she was, she couldn’t forget Alexis.

Kayla swallowed her fear and the lump in her throat. Her hand fell from the volume dial and settled back on the wheel. She pushed down on the gas pedal a little and readjusted her posture. Mile seven waited.

“Let’s go,” she murmured.

Kayla dissociated. Mile seven didn’t differ from the others, so she let herself dwell on her wish again. Alexis. The heat of her mouth as it slanted over hers. The tug of her hand tangled in Kayla’s hair.

Her phone pinged. Mile eight. She let off the gas and let the car roll almost to a stop, tapping the pedal just to keep the car moving. She couldn’t stop. Ahead, her headlights flickered. They cast eerie shadows over the trees. She tried not to look at the shadows.

Cold crept into the car. It brushed the back of Kayla’s neck and draped itself over her shoulders. If she hadn’t turned on the heater before, she bet it wouldn’t have worked now. Somehow, that logic fit the game.

The chill stiffened her joints and burned her lungs. Her breath fogged up the windows. She used her sleeve to wipe off enough of the windshield to see. If she couldn’t see, she couldn’t keep going. She had to keep going no matter what happened.

Her teeth chattered. She shivered. Still, she kept driving.

Alexis appeared on the road.

Kayla kept herself from braking. She couldn’t stop the car. Still, she couldn’t fathom hitting Alexis or the image of Alexis, even though she was dead. Even though she’d hurt herself worse than Kayla ever could.

Right before she hit Alexis, Kayla squeezed her eyes shut. When she opened them again, Alexis had vanished.

Her phone pinged again. She’d begun mile nine. Two more until she’d see Alexis for real.

The Corolla’s engine sputtered, and the vehicle stalled. Kayla swore.

Alexis appeared again. This time, blood dripped from her mouth and eyes. Kayla hesitated. She had to do something… was she supposed to close her eyes? If she closed her eyes, how would she know where she was going?

Maybe the game would get her car moving and guide it along the road again. Maybe she should close her eyes and trust the process.

Kayla closed her eyes. She let out a shuddering breath. It was still so damn cold in the car. She knew without opening her eyes her fingertips were blue.

Kayla latched onto her car keys. With all the strength she could muster, she turned the key in the ignition. The car grumbled and sputtered in protest.

Shit. She tried again, this time muttering a prayer to whatever god was listening. The engine sprang to life, along with Alexis’s vocal cords.

“Don’t you want to see me, Kayla?”

The voice was just as she’d remembered, and pain knifed Kayla’s heart. Her eyes were still closed. She knew beyond a doubt that she couldn’t open them. Now that the car had started, it was time to hit the gas.

“Kayla,” said Alexis.

Kayla hit the gas. She kept her eyes squeezed shut as the car surged forward and the mile counter sounded off.

She’d survived mile nine. Only one more to go.

Her eyes burned as she opened them. Unshed tears threatened to spill. After Alexis died, she thought she’d used up all her tears. Maybe it was fitting she shed some for her again.

Something flashed in the rearview mirror. Teeth, or maybe scales? Kayla ignored it.

The counter went off. Mile eleven. The end was in sight. She swore she could do this.

The car whirred as it powered down again. Kayla remembered that was supposed to happen. Even if the engine stopped, the car would still move forward, propelled by unseen forces.

Kayla relaxed and tried to fix her eyes on the road again. A traffic light sprang into view, wrought iron, with a stoplight hanging from it. The stoplight glowed an eerie red.

Kayla closed her eyes and covered her ears. Flashing lights and colors shone through her closed eyelids, and terrifying screams and threats slipped between her fingers and into her ears. The radio started up again, blaring more of the preacher’s sermon. Alexis’s voice floated about the din, whispering Kayla’s name before dissolving into tears.

The dam holding back Kayla’s own tears finally broke. She kept her eyes shut and her hands over her ears. What if this never ended? What if she’d lost the game somehow, and this was her punishment?

Her heartbeat faltered. Her breathing went shallow, erratic, and quick. Panic rattled her nerves. She wanted to scream, but somehow, adding to the chaos felt like it might make it worse.

Then, she remembered: Mile eleven, she could stop. Kayla put her foot on the brake and pressed until she couldn’t press down anymore. The voices and the lights died down. She sat for a moment and breathed.

Success was so close she could taste it. It was the cherry-scented lip gloss Alexis had always worn. Kayla didn’t think she’d ever forget the sticky sweetness of Alexis’s mouth as they kissed, her vanilla perfume swirling around both of them, the snake tattoo that curled up the side of her neck—

The road ended abruptly. Kayla didn’t notice the yellow DEAD END sign until it was almost too late to stop the car. According to the rules, once she reached the dead end, she could stop the car and make her wish.

Kayla let out a shaky laugh in relief. She’d made it this far. Her journey was over. All she needed to do now was ask for what she wanted.

Her tongue darted out to wet her lips. She closed her eyes. She thought again about kissing Alexis and telling her how much she meant to her.

Let me see her, she thought. Let me kiss her, please. One last time. That’s all I need.

In the quiet of the idling car, with her eyes still closed, Kayla could almost pretend she wasn’t taking part in a terrifying game in the middle of the night. She could almost pretend she’d done something logical, something to give her closure without risking her life.

Almost.

“Kayla.”

Kayla’s eyes flew open. There, standing in front of the sign, was Alexis. No longer dripping blood, she looked as she had the last time Kayla saw her alive, blonde pixie cut and bright brown eyes, snake tattoo, and a smile. Kayla’s heart leapt.

What was she supposed to do next? This was the end of the road. She’d won.

Kayla beamed and wrenched the driver’s side door open. It screamed in protest. Kayla climbed out of the car and stepped into the glow of the headlights. The air chilled her skin, still somehow warmer than inside the car, even with the heater on. Alexis was there. She was really there.

And Kayla was going to kiss her.

Her heart fluttered in a bittersweet way she recognized as she crept closer to Alexis, who was still smiling. Recognition flashed in her eyes. Kayla wiped tears from her eyes. Damn it, she wouldn’t ruin her wish by crying.

“You look beautiful,” Kayla said.

“Mile eleven,” Alexis replied. “What did you wish for?”

“You.”

“Was it worth it?”

“Of course.”

Kayla took another step closer to Alexis. She pulled her girlfriend into an embrace, marveling at how warm and solid she felt. Alexis leaned into the contact. As Kayla’s eyelids drooped, Alexis flashed seven rows of suddenly serrated teeth at her. Kayla screamed and looked into Alexis’s eyes. They were blood red and slitted and nothing she knew.

Right before the monster lunged, Kayla remembered the last rule:

Don’t get out of the car until you’re back home.

#I haven't posted any writing in a while #so here!#lmk if you want to be tagged in my snippets/excerpts in general #queer horror #short stories #my writing #my stories #writeblr #horror writing

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alltimefail-sims · 1 year ago

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OKAY SO LITTLE UPDATE AND SCATTERED THOUGHTS ON THE NEW EP

It turns out that removing 95% of your mods will improve the game's overall ability to run. Not shocking, but it's definitely a thing lol. I've also learned that some mods, while amazing conceptually, will probably not be added back into my game. This isn't on the modders: some mods are just so complex that I honestly can't keep up with them and therefore can't enjoy their features to the full extent. I do miss my custom recipes, wonderful whims, and a few lumpinou mods though (but that's really it so far).

I also removed all my custom sliders because I have no idea what is broken and what isn't at this point. Shocked to say I don't miss most of them, so I think it might be time I clean that folder out. I did, however, miss my presets!!! Especially body and mouth presets! Likely gonna tidy up those folders and then add those back in.

Kijiko eyelash remover seems to be working perfectly fine in my game, so if you use that one you are probably good to go.

The new pack's CAS items are good! I don't think I'm going to use a lot of it outside of sims in Tomarang, but that's okay. As of right now I am not planning to do an in-depth review of the CAS items because I pretty much just feel "fine" about all of it across the board: I don't hate anything but I'm not absolutely in love with anything either. Idk if I'm just feeling this way or if others are as well, but it seems like a lot of the items (especially the hairs) aren't really new and they're just modifications of things we already have... but that could be just me. I will say the cute dress with the slit up the side... chef's kiss. Needed more swatches though!

One unexpected item that I did love was the tea kettle!! I'm never buying a tea magic brewer or tea pot ever again. I never realized how badly I needed the ability to only make one cup of a tea/hot chocolate/coffee at time but it has been a game changer. I don't have much to say about the build/buy... it's all really nice. 🤷‍♀️ Wish there were more items that really stood out, but for the most part it's all just good, simple pieces with a few beautiful wall hangings (nice posters, a few good plants, love the baskets, standing toilet is a nice addition, adore the plastic garden chairs, etc.). Functional radiators, water tanks, etc. were fantastic additions with this pack and I would have been happy if they were just decor tbh (and was expecting them to be) but the fact that they aren't makes me very happy. Compatibility across packs is done far too rarely, so I'll let the sims team have this one crumb of a win.

I'm still testing this pack out so gameplay features are being dicovered bit by bit. Haven't ran into some of the big bugs people have been having, but I'm still early in the save and playing as a tenant (I stand by the fact that I have 0 interest being a property owner). The tester sim I made (Riley, she/they) vibed so hard with Vanesha Cahyaputri. Like the two of them have "amazing compatibility" and had full bar friendship almost instantly and I did not make Riley with any partner in mind... I didn't even know Vanesha was a canon lesbian! But they haven't had a single negative interaction soooo brb I'm on my way to make her over ASAP because I loooooovee a good sapphic friends to lovers arc. 😂

Lastly: I have some asks in my inbox. I swear I'm not ignoring you if you've messaged me, it's just been a chaotic few days as December is always so busy. I will answer them as soon as I can! Until the holidays are over I'll probably be posting sporadically! I'm still going to be here, but I'm enjoying just playing the game without any pressure to post about it.

Also, with updates breaking cc and sliders like crazy, it's unlikely I'll be sharing any sims outside of sim requests for a while. I'll still crank out builds, happily chat about my OCs, and reblog other people's content on here. For now I plan to just enjoy my time with my family and play the game stress free! ❤

Okay bye now!

#also idk where that gif is from but it's hilarious #okay I'm done now haha update over for real #update #personal #gif warning #ignore spelling errors this is a mess of thoughts

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chilipowder9 · 1 year ago

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I'M LOW ENERGY, SAD I CAN'T SEW YET, AND TERRIFIED OF MY DEPRESSION CAVE

I'm going to ignore EVERYTHING and be creative in a lazy way that still makes me feel good!!

I'm going to give a preset sim a makeover!

I respect real people's style choices...

...BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN I HAVE TO RESPECT SIMS' STYLE CHOICES THIS IS HIDEOUS!!!!

Context: I have a sims world were my sim has a industrial diy shack that's a repurposed warehouse with a bunch of cheap or upcycled things, and I allow friends and other sims I make to be friends to move in, often just adding yet another bunk, or even a tree house

so let's start with the first sim who asked to join our little punk found family (even though I've been working on making my best friend in the sims, I would show y'all my current sim but she is literally me built into the sims - my name included - and I do not wish to show that around the internet, the little portrait in the corner is too much to me anyway but I'm too lazy to do anything about it

I'm not messing with her outfit one bit yet, I'm changing her first, I love what they tried to do, but they failed to do it, so I'm going to try and make Lilith Vatore still Lilith Vatore, but more to my liking... oh yeah, the eyebrows are gone

okay maybe I like them just a bit toned down

now remember guys: I don't want a model, just someone I don't mind seeing every in game night (vampire sim)

her lips don't need to go but they do need adjusting

basically just make them wider, she's already almost model in my opinion

while I understand some people may be in love with her hairstyle, I am not

this is a similar hairstyle that doesn't throw me off for the perfectly square bangs (seriously, if you have perfectly square bangs good job idk how y'all do it)

and literally with that her physical existence is done! Now I'm gonna mess with her makeup!!

I already can't remember what she had so I'm gonna wing it!

I'd say I did good since I never do makeup

now....the outfit...

got an upgrade!

I'm antsy to get this posted so I'll just update when I do Business

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maxbrodbeckfilmblog · 8 months ago

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Lola’s Room: Colour Grade

I was the colorist on Lola’s Room.

I didn’t design a LUT for Lola’s Room, as we did test shoots the day before the shoot, and I didn’t have time to use it to build a look for the film. This is something I regret and really helped on The Man who Fell in Love with the Sky, and I wish I’d spent time on for Lola’s Room in pre-production.

I spent 2 & 1/2 12 hour days on the grade for Lola’s Room. The grade was a good opportunity for me to compensate for any problems I had with the images I shot, and I am significantly happier with my cinematography post-grade. A lot of the work was spent on directing the eye, and balancing the levels of exposure and saturation across the scenes, which used quite different lighting setups.

The node tree I used was the same for Lola’s Room as The Man who Fell in Love with the Sky. I was colour grading them at the same time, so using the same workflow avoided any confusion and sped up the process significantly.

The first row of nodes balances the images in exposure, contrast, temperature, saturation and skin-tone, allowing for controlled and easy manipulation of the colour. In the parallel nodes I highlighted areas of each shot, and used them for more specific changes to individual elements of the image.

The opening scene was the most consistent, and fits the soft but saturated intentions I had with the cinematography. It was relatively easy to grade. I made use of tracked masks on faces, with inverted versions to lower the exposure of anything that wasn’t the faces, directing the eye to the action and making the lighting feel more placed and deliberate. I am not entirely happy with the bathroom scene and the following scene, which stand out from the rest of the film due to different lighting, a none of the pink hue which dominates the rest of the film. The final results don’t feel out of place, but aren’t consistent with the visual style.

I added the Kodak 65 film look Davinci LUT preset at 20% intensity across the film, as it separates the luminosity scale towards a filmic look, as well as altering the hues into gently complementary positions. I added varying amounts of noise reduction to deal with some of the grain of the corrupted cards, as well as the colour noise of the grade itself.

I worked through various drafts of the grade. Paula met me at screen academy to work through the grade and give feedback on the consistency of the images. A second opinion really helps, as my eyes adjust to the current conditions of the grade, leading to the picture getting more and more contrasting and saturated.

Log Footage -> Final Image

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riddlerosehearts · 9 months ago

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more bg3 thoughts with my half-elf bard elenion. first i want to mention that i actually changed his face/head a bit because it had started bugging me that his ears looked longer and pointier than a half-elf's should really be--they were too much like a full elf's. so i took a closer look at what options were available in the head presets mod i have installed, and i found one that's really similar to what i already had with the biggest differences i can notice just being the ears, and also it has freckles built into it which i was thinking of adding to him anyway. he looks like this now:

i may or may not have cool dyes really early because of mods lol. also, i get really sad about gale in this post!

first thing i came across in the mountain pass was some lady who wanted us to steal a githyanki egg for her so i said no because that just sounds like bad news and i don't think my character would do it. yes i'm locking myself out of quests for the sake of roleplay LOL (i also said no to helping the zhentarim with whatever the fuck they were doing) but it is technically still open if i change my mind, and if not, then it's something i'll get to explore on another playthrough.

HEY IT'S ELMINSTER. I KNOW HIM. and elenion does too because bards get a whole class-specific conversation for this!

i don't usually reload just to try different options but i figure if there's class-specific stuff then i might as well, so i tried all 3 of these and saved elminster's responses. this is what he says about each option:

i actually liked the sound of the last one's title, but elenion hates anything written by volo on principle because of exactly what elminster is describing and therefore that is not going to be their actual response. i think they probably like the first one best.

???? and now elminster is telling us that mystra will only grant "forgiveness" to gale if he stops the absolute by killing himself. and gale is just not objecting to this at all. that is NOT one of the many things i was spoiled about. what the fuck.

well yeah, and elenion is a half-elf who's falling in love with a human and is already keenly aware of the difference in their lifespans and how little time they might have with him (they're not thinking about gale being a powerful wizard who could magically extend his lifespan because they'd never assume that someone would want to do that for them. and more importantly he kind of has a bomb in his chest). there is no way they'd let that time be cut even shorter by allowing gale to kill himself for mystra, and neither will i 😭😭

seriously. it is insane how chill gale is acting about this and how little self-worth he has. part of elenion's story is that they feel responsible for the death of their father so they are not going to let someone else they love die if they can stop it. also i hate mystra right now because literally what the fuck?! what kind of goddess asks that of someone?! before i started playing this game i saw people hate on gale and complain about how "he never stops talking about his ex" but they left out the fact that his ex is the actual goddess of magic who is abusing him!! of course he's going to talk about her!! i'm so sad wtf.

this is actually so completely insane that i'm considering having elenion eat some of the mindflayer parasite specimens and using this as a justification for them feeling desperate enough to do it, because what's the point of any of this if they once again aren't strong enough to save their loved ones? but i'm also still torn because on the one hand the power the guardian is promising could still just be a trick and i'm sure there will be some sort of story consequences down the line for putting more tadpoles in your brain. on the other hand whatever consequences there are might make things more narratively interesting. why am i so indecisive about this omg.

anyway:

this entire conversation is incredible LMAO. i love karlach. i now desperately wish we could see gale's live reaction to karlach telling him that.

you know... maybe lae'zel's words here would help convince elenion that he doesn't need to use the illithid powers to be strong enough to protect gale, when he's got such a powerful group of allies backing him up. this also definitely makes him like and respect lae'zel more, when he's spent most of the game so far finding her abrasive and frustrating to deal with but unfortunately necessary to have around.

THIS on the other hand is not going to make him dislike astarion any less. i think you could look at this dialogue as astarion trying to express in his own fucked up way that he cares, but elenion would definitely interpret it more as "caring more about controlling the cult than about gale being ordered to kill himself" and think it was crazy insensitive of him. so it is probably going to take a long time for them to be able to be friends.

YESS THANK YOU WYLL. wyll is so sweet and good and is basically saying the exact same thing as lae'zel. and elenion puts a lot of stock in his opinion because i've got 97 approval with wyll so they're definitely besties lol. so you know what. i'm going to continue ignoring the tadpoles and i'll roleplay my own indecisiveness as elenion himself having felt really torn up and afraid after talking to elminster and gale, and very strongly considering listening to the dream guardian before speaking to everyone and feeling reassured that there must be another way that doesn't require giving himself more brain worms.

and speaking of wyll and elenion being besties--when i crossed over to rosymorn monastery i got a bit of banter between shadowheart and wyll where he named off a couple of dramatic-sounding titles and was like "i'm trying to decide on a title for this chapter of the blade's adventures!". so they are definitely bonding over wyll being kind of an overdramatic dork who loves talking about his heroic adventures.

after wandering through the monastery area a lot, i found my way to the creche. i checked out a portrait of vlaakith and had a dexterity check option to draw a new face onto it. elenion would not vandalize artwork like that but i couldn't resist so i did it and then reloaded to do the history check instead LMAO. i'm obsessed with the fact that not only is this possible to do but your tav gets this ridiculous grin on their face while lae'zel gets mad:

exploring the creche and seeing the cruel and unforgiving environment that lae'zel has been shaped by is fascinating. in the classrooms they force children to fight to the death, and i had to pass a very high persuasion check to convince the teacher to leave a student who didn't want to kill someone alone. in the infirmary, lae'zel says that if certain protocols are broken then kids are hit with barbed whips. in the hatchery, only one egg has yet to hatch and there's a letter to its caretaker that says that if it can't hatch on its own it should be destroyed--and according to lae'zel, most caretakers would do so. it really is no wonder she's the way she is, and i can't wait to see how she develops.

but also if you tell the caretaker you want to take the egg to another creche that's more forgiving lae'zel approves and then says she feels drawn to its warmth omg 🥺 i just know she has a soft spot for kids.

i keep going back and forth on how i think elenion should feel about the dream guardian. i guess i can roleplay that as them being conflicted, like they were about consuming the tadpoles. i think they definitely want to trust the guardian and believe that she's not just protecting them as a way to use them for her own motives, and generally they do choose to trust her, but they've also been afraid of what could happen if they use the tadpoles and something goes wrong. however, i also think that after getting to meet the dream guardian face-to-face and learn all of these insane things about the githyanki and vlaakith which were then backed up by kith'rak voss, they've become more inclined to believe her.

anyway i am really glad i went to the mountain pass!! and now i definitely don't want to pass up on whatever cool story beats are waiting in the underdark. so, roleplay reasoning for this is that we were already planning to double back anyway after going to check out the creche since it was seemingly the most reasonable lead on a cure, but that uhhhh did not work out and now continuing to travel through the mountain pass feels especially dangerous.

#star plays bg3

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godsnameisjoy · 2 years ago

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EFFORTLESSLY PEACEFUL

Date: 18 February 2023

Duration: 68 minutes at 11:01 PM

Depth:

There have been many nights in the past when I have wished for effortless obtaining of a decent meditation duration. Last night’s meditation seems like a first to me. Since I haven’t experienced such a degree of effortlessness at meditation in a while, it feels like a first.

Usually, I enter my deepest best concentration of mind the moment I begin meditating. Usually, my attention takes about half an hour to change directions. My attention can go inwards and remain at its best depth of mind without distractions for about half an hour. Thereafter, my attention will come around, without me wanting it to.

My attention will take a breather from deep meditation without my permission. In the past, there have been months at a stretch when I have attempted returning my attention to the deep in a given meditation, but I have been unsuccessful. During such phases, I have accepted my shortcomings as a meditator and ended the session. Back then, I had figured that the way around the short durations was adding more sessions daily.

Last night is different from all the nights before it simply because of the effortlessly achieved goal of one hour of meditation. Life energies flowing in the head give the perception of Peace. Peace makes much possible. The feeling of Peace is powerful enough to hold one’s attention to it. One can be with Peace while one’s head is being shaken involuntarily by the very energy that is being perceived as Peace.

I want to be able to remember in as much detail as possible the last 34 minutes of last night’s meditation. Those are the minutes when I expect to lose concentration. I know that beyond the surface level consciousness of memory, I don’t have any conscious control over my attention. I also know that my attention behaves fine only for about 30 minutes without me interfering with it.

The second half of last night’s meditation went by in a breeze just like the first half. When I came around, the timer app asked me to add 6 minutes to a preset 61 minutes. It felt good to have exceeded the one hour mark without making a conscious effort. I spent 2 minutes affirming for harmony and then stopped meditating.

#meditation #paramhansa yogananda #god #hong sau #intuition #inner peace #kundalini #18.2.2023

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2034734comp · 2 years ago

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Etude 2 - Thematic and Variations Development

Now was the time for our first piece of work. I did struggle a little bit with this task. Not due to my aptitude, but it took me a while to chose a scene.

I first tried to do the opening scene from Gulliver's Travels, from 1939. I had the right idea I think with the music in terms of textures and genres, but my execution wasn’t there. I found myself stuck writing horns and it’s not a style I feel comfortable working in at this point in time. Maybe I should of persevered, but I also think the age of the material just wasn't terribly exciting to work with. And I found myself not wanting the use the scene.

Work in Progress:

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I decided I needed to find another scene to work with, and as I had to use the same film for the next etude, I wanted to chose something that would make me want to fully engage with the material. I was thinking of using scenes from the film Eraserhead. But after some internal debate as to what I could actually add to the work, I opted to use scenes from Waking Life by Richard Linklater.

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I watched this film on a whim one Saturday afternoon and fell in love with it. There isn’t really a plot and it’s just a film about conversations and ideas. I found it really refreshing and hypnotic to watch. I started by finding a cutting point between the start and when the dialogue ends which leads to the music.

I cut the audio at 33s in. In order to not make the cut jarring, I added some wind sounds to play through the whole scenes, and recorded some foley sounds for when the paper folds at 37s. I also recorded some footsteps and placed them accordingly, whilst making sure the wind was still blowing.

Tonally, I wanted an arpeggiating synth playing two notes in the background with the filter cut off down as low as it goes but with it opening up as the scene builds tension. Also adding some more notes to the arp and some panning. I was conscious of not overdoing it, as I wanted to scene to feel a bit tense and forward in motion. Especially as its the opening credit. The notes on the arp are E-G-G#-A#-C. These notes modulate and pan between different synthesisers.

I really enjoyed doing this scene, I think I did a good job with it, especially as to not overdo it. Part of me wishes I had pushed myself to do the original scene, but I am happy with the work that came out.

Part 2

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For the second part of the etude, I opted for this scene from Waking Life. In the original scene, there isn’t any music. So it was quite easy to just use the dialogue and score underneath.

As the scene is a monologue, I found it really important for the music not to take over but also for it to not be unnoticeable. I used the same notes as in the previous task, but kept the filter cut off low during the entire scene.

What we do have that is different, is as the character gets angrier and more frustrated, he turns more and more red. I found a preset that when you play a note, it goes up through the octaves, and with the more notes you put in, the more frustrated the narrator seemed to get. So this fit in really well thematically.

Every time his face changes colour, I add another note, and hold them until the scene ends and the tension is cut.

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galindaelphaba · 2 years ago

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Hi so I’ve had a couple of anons asking me how I make my gifs (some specifically hsmtmts gifs lol) so I’ve decided to write up a tutorial of the basics of how I make my gifs. I’m going to try and make it as detailed and clear as possible - but I have been pretty busy with uni and stuff so if I miss anything or anything isn’t clear just lmk and I will do my best to clarify. I’m going to try and include any resources or other tutorials which may be useful as I go along. This is going to be quite long and detailed so tutorial follows under the cut. For some basic steps I know of good tutorials for - I will link tutorials rather than re-explaining :)

Before we begin with the tutorial part bear with me there are a couple of screencaps which I took out of sequence because I forgot to take them at the step I did it - and the final gif colouring result looks kind of different from the rest of the screencaps because when I was adding the gif to the gifset I was making it for I decided it needed to be brighter because the s3 scene was much brighter than the s2 gif I made for this tutorial (none of this really matters, just explaining the slight discrepancy in some of the caps).

1. SOFTWARE

To make all of my gifs I use Photoshop CS5 (this is the version I use). Any version of Photoshop should work with the methods in this tutorial and you can find a masterlist of cracked photoshops here

2. FINDING HQ VIDEO

When making gifs I always use 1080p video - but not all 1080p is created equally. Generally remux files and larger file sizes will produce better quality screencaps so this is what I search for when giffing. I know a lot of gifmakers who swear by using 4k, but personally I find 4k is more trouble than its worth in my opinion (screencaps always come out weird on my computer - like with a full on green tint, and they take forever to download). For HSMTMS in particular I like to use the release labelled 1080p SALT.

In terms of finding videos, this is a good guide on downloading.

3. SCREENCAPPING

I use mpv player to take screencaps for my gifs. This is a tutorial on how to use and install mpv. When taking your screencaps make sure you have continuous screencaps and no frames are skipped or duplicated. These missing/extra frames will make your gif look choppy and the animation won’t be smooth.

After finishing my screencaps I put them all in folders and move the folders to my desktop (but it can be anywhere you easily can access the folder) to import into Photoshop.

4. IMPORTING SCREENCAPS TO PHOTOSHOP

Open Photoshop. Open the Menu path "File > Scripts > Load Multiple DICOM files” and select the folder where the screencaps for your gif are.

5. CROPPING AND RESIZING GIFS

Click the ‘Crop’ button on Photoshop (the little button shown in the screenshot below). Typically I like to use a preset so that all the gifs in the set I make are the same size. For this set I used the 4x5 crop preset because that is what I typically use.

Position the crop where you want the gif (typically I like the character in the center).

Then push enter (or the tick next to the crop buttons) to confirm your crop.

Use the keyboard shortcut Ctrl + Alt + I to resize your image. This will bring up a little pop up like this:

Resize your gif accordingly based on the width. It is important to use the correct dimensions for the size of the gif you wish to make. These are summarized in the below image.

When you change the width to the correct size (e.g. in this case 540px) the height will automatically change as well.

Click Ok to resize.

6. ANIMATING YOUR GIF + SHARPENING

There are quite a lot of steps to turning your frames into a timeline animation. They are covered in detail in this amazing gif tutorial (which is the main one which helped me learn to gif).

It would be useful to have a read of how the process works, but to speed things up for myself I use a Photoshop action (shared here) I made that does all these steps for me plus my sharpening😊 (Here is a tutorial explaining how to create & install Photoshop actions)

I just highlight the word animate click the play sign and it does all the tedious steps in a couple of seconds. Note it is important to keep the reverse frames one unticked as shown in the screencap otherwise your gifs will move backwards

After that runs through we have our gif in timeline mode sharpened and ready to colour :)

7. BASIC COLOURING TECHNIQUE

My basic colouring process is very simple and honestly it may shock some people but I primarily colour my basic scene gifs using only the curves and vibrance adjustment layers. There a few reasons for this – 1) The curves tool is a powerful tool and you can do a lot with it 2) Less adjustment layers = better quality gifs 3) This works for me and it is what I find easy. Essentially, I like to keep things simple where ever possible.

First I add a curves layer by clicking on the highlighted adjustment layer

This gives you a menu that looks like this:

The great thing about Curves is that Photoshop will do a lot of the work for us if we use the eyedropper tools.

First I click the white eye dropper – then I pick a white point on the gif and see how it goes. This can take a few times to get right and often I will try a few times to see which I like best.

For this gif I selected the white light in the background but it looks a little green to me

After I have selected my white point I will usually do the same thing except with picking a black point of the gifs. I don’t always pick a dark point it kind of depends on how much I like what Curves has done with the white point and if I think the gif needs more contrast.

For this gif I picked a black point of the area behind Ricky. This is what the gif looks like now with the dark point chosen:

This looks a little better to me than just the white point – but the screencap still looks kind of yellowy and dark to me. So what I do now is I go into each colour channel for the curve and manually adjust it to my liking.

Since this gif is yellow I start in the blue channel and add more blue. I do this by changing the drop down menu on the curves screen from RGB to blue. This gives me something like this to work with:

Essentially I adjust the amount of blue in the gif by sliding the white arrow down the bottom up or down to add more or less blue to the gif. For this gif I am going to slide white arrow at the bottom to the left to make the gif more blue (i.e. neutralise yellow). If I think I have added too much blue I slide it back to the right to add yellow back in.

This is what I adjusted it to and it already looks a lot better

I am actually pretty happy with the overall colouring of this for the moment and I don’t think I need to go into the red and green curves. But I will briefly explain what they do/how they work by showing what some adjustments to these curves looks like.

Red curve – here is our starting point

Dragging the curve to the left will introduce more red into the image

Dragging it back to the right will take out red (the gif will become more cyan)

Green curves: this is our starting point

Dragging the green curve to the left will add more green to the image

Dragging it to the right will take green out (adding pink/magenta)

So after I am happy I have coloured the image in curves If I want the gif to be a little brighter I go back to the main RBG Curves screen and drag the white arrow a little up to the left to add some additional brightness

After colouring with Curves I add in a Vibrance layer (highlighted adjustment layer)

Typically I set the vibrance somewhere between 50 and 60.

This is what the gif looks like now:

At this point I also have another quick look at the gif and see if I think I need to go back into curves and tweak the colouring a bit and add a bit of extra brightness. When I add in the Vibrance I find it easier to see if there is any underylying colours I want to go back and neutralise/adjust in my curves layer again.

This is what I end up with after making my adjustments post vibrance layer:

Another step I do sometimes is grabbing the black slider on curves and dragging it just a little bit to the right to add some depth and contrast to the gif. As s2 of hsmtmts is really dark I didn’t do it for this gif because I don’t think it needs it. But I will show an example of what this might look like:

This is basically it for my basic colouring. Of course there are a lot of different steps to making my colourful gifsets, but this is just a basic tutorial for the way I gif standard scenes so I will move on to subtitling gifs.

8. CAPTIONS

My go to subtitle font is Arial Rounded MT Bold. I have Faux Italic and Faux Bold Selected for this. I like bigger font sizes because I have bad eyesight so usually I will opt between 20 – 24 pt font size

I click the T button to add text then I type out my caption.

Obviously we don’t want our text here so I align it to the bottom and centre of the gif I do this by first selecting the move tool then going ctrl + a (this selects our gif as the boundary for our alignment). You will know this is done based on the border that comes around the gif (also please ignore that drop shadow and outline settings have already been applied here lol – I added this in because I forgot to screen cap/ explain this part initially)

Then I align my text using the following menu buttons:

Next I Ctrl +D to remove the selection (you need to do this to be able to nudge your text up for the next step). This is the result of the alignment:

Now I nudge the caption up by selecting the text layer and pushing ctrl + shift + up

This is the result:

This looks ok, but I always add an outline and dropshadow to make the text more readable. To do this I go into the blending options for the text layer. You can do this by right clicking the layer and selecting blending options or by double clicking the layer (but not on the text).

First I add Stroke with these settings

Then I add Drop Shadow with these settings:

9. SAVING GIFS

To save your file use the keyboard shortcut Ctrl + Alt + Shift + S to open the save for web settings. You will get a screen like this. The settings shown in this screen are my typical save settings (except it should say ‘Forever’ on looping options)

However, Tumblr’s gif limit is 10mb so the size of this gif is too big to upload (it is nearly 12 mb) so we have to go back in the timeline to shorten the gif a bit so we can upload it to tumblr.

I do this by dragging the red preview thingy (idk what else to call it) around till I find a point where I feel the gif has a natural end. Then I grab the timeline bar thingy (idk what it’s called but the silver gray bar at the end of the gif) to the red bar to shorten the gif.

Now press Ctrl + Alt + Shift + S again to save your gif and make sure you set the Looping Option to ‘Forever’. Sometimes I have to shorten the gif a few times to get it under 10mb - but luckily I got it first go this time :)

Now your gif is saved but there is still one step left to do. Photoshop has a glitch where it automatically sets gif speed to 0.7 after saving from the timeline function – we don’t want that! The gifs look very slow and are not very smooth.

So what we do is we open the gif that we just saved and this will open in the frame format. All we have to do is select all frames and set the gif speed to 0.5 – I also have this in my action so I go back to the actions and highlight the line that says ‘set frame speed’ and play the action through

Then we just save the gif again as we just did 😊

This is the end result:

and what the gif looks like without any colouring or text:

One other helpful tip:

If you are giffing from the same scene you can do your colouring and text manually as per the tutorial on the first gif for the set and then drag what you did across to the second (after cropping, resizing and animating it). All you need to do is drag the colouring outside to a different window then highlight your adjustment layers + text and drag them to the new canvas off of the gif (If you drag it on top of the gif it will place it where you put it. Make sure to go off the canvas to so it will keep you positioning/alignment of the text you made 😊)

Basically - you drag the text, curves, vibrance (and any other layers you need) to the gray area of your photoshop document and your colouring will be applied and your text will be placed in the same position as your source doc.

Ok so that is my super basic gif tutorial - if anyone has any questions feel free to ask!

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