#i will trans everyone's gender and you can't stop me

[unb1nding-t-b0y]

Hey trans girls! I love that y'all like estrogen so much better! I love that you like your transition and feel so much more free and fulfilled without the effects of Testosterone. That's great!!! However can we stop with the omg testosterone is evil talk??? Please? Cuz if you wanna go there I can. I could rant for hours about "why would ANYONE want girlmones???" and id have a mile long list of all the ways it made me feel shitty. However I keep that shit to myself because I understand that not everyones experience is mine. There's no excuse for the way so many trans women have torn down and insulted the gender affirming care that FINALLY made ME comfortable in MY skin. You don't get it and that's fine but save it I don't need to hear it everytime I go out and hang out with other trannies. Seriously Everytime I've gone to hangout with a group of mostly trans girls one of you can't resist insulting me and my transition and it's not fucking ok.

[genderqueerdykes]

just kind of throwing this at your wall, sorry in advance. saw the post about "kill all men" and got really upset

im a trans guy. my boyfriend is cis, and im the first guy hes dated before. (sees me fully as whatever i want to be, does not care about my gender expression and loves me for me. great guy). he doesnt have many friends from being asocial as a teenager, so most of his friends are my trans friends!

of course. like every trans group seems to fall prey to, theres always the "all [CIS] men are bad" conversation that comes up somehow. and i never really thought much of it, because in my head itd be "ah yeah all men Except My Boyfriend"

but he and i were talking after some drinks, and he made a point that really struck me. about how he doesn't like being The Exception to the point, that he's still a man and has no interest in being anything But a man. so when people say stuff like that, he gets uncomfortable; not because He IS The Problem (like everyone who gives the "if youre saying not all men, youre the men" argument) but because it makes him feel ostracized from everyone. and idk, it really struck me.

we say stuff like that way too often in an attempt to exclude certain groups of people; and i feel like we end up excluding people close to us by proxy.

thanks for listening

i really appreciate you for taking the time to send this. i've been meaning to talk about this and have been forgetting. the following is of course not directed at you, anon, it is directed at people who behave like this

you're not feminist, progressive, cool, pro-queer rights or funny for saying "kill all men". you are exposing that you are a violent and dangerous person for believing that people should be profiled and literally killed for their gender or PERCEIVED gender.

this doesn't make people like you more. it outs you as a danger. how do we know you won't turn that hatred toward women whenever you feel like changing the goalposts? i can't trust someone like that to not turn that hatred toward other genders, either. YOU are the dangerous person you are profiling men as. you can't use men as a scapegoat for everything. sometimes YOU are the violent person who needs help.

your boyfriend shouldn't have to feel like that. like people have never really cared about gay men but people just straight up gave up all pretenses that they do and i hate it. cis men are not inherently evil. cis men can still be queer. cis men can still be good people. your boyfriend shouldn't have to feel isolated because he's cis. that's profiling. he belongs. why do people assume that everyone with a partner who is a man hates them? not everyone is choosing to be in a relationship with someone they hate. i understand that some people will date someone no matter who just to have a partner so they're not lonely, but not everyone does this. some people genuinely love their boyfriends

i'm sorry you both have dealt with this. i hope things can improve because men don't deserve to feel like this. this is why toxic masculinity exists in the first place. we have to stop reinforcing that men are evil monsters. they won't stop believing that if we keep telling them that forever. stay safe. your boyfriend is not a bad person & deserves to have a wonderful life.

[mosoderbergh]

So as a trans guy myself, the way Veilguard deals with these topics has been really nice to see. Like... I am lucky enough to have a really supportive group of people around me, but I've had days where Emmrich's dialog options on the topic ("most people accepted me, but not everyone" - "they are fools") has meant more to me than I care to admit. This MIGHT have spun off into a little scenario in my head.

One where Rook gets wounded in battle. *Badly* wounded. He's pretty sure he's going to die. He can feel his life seep out of him. and even as someone else is already healing him, he calls for Emmrich. Even if all he's had with him were a few moments of passing flirtation.

Emmrich is at his side immediately, taking his hand, all practiced but warm-hearted bedside manner.

"You mustn't strain yourself now", Emmrich says, trying and failing to mask his concern. But Rook doesn't listen. He's wide-eyed, gasping. Panicked.

"Emmrich, my parents are going to bury me under my old name."

"No one is going to bury you, Rook."

"Please! They can't... Don't let them bury me as a woman."

And Emmrich, who still wants to tell Rook he's going to be fine, stops himself. Because he doesn't know. And because this is important. He leans in, professionalism replaced with rasped intensity.

"Never."

Then, and only then, Rook lets himself sink into unconsciousness.

He survives, of course. And after he's recovered a bit, Emmrich presents him with a stack of papers. Because it turns out it's not his first rodeo when it comes to this topic. And so he explains to Rook how, once your gender is cemented in Nevarran bureaucracy, there's nothing any ill-meaning relatives can do about it. And Emmrich was fully prepared to take care of this process for Rook - it's more difficult to do posthumously, but not impossible, especially not for a corpse whisperer of his standing.

"I must say, though: I much prefer doing it this way", he says as he settles in his library with Rook for an evening of tea and paperwork.

[versegm]

Reminders:

"Intersex" means "someone born with sexual characteristics that don't fit quite well in the male/female sex binary."

"Intersex" is not synonymous to "non-binary". In fact, being intersex has nothing to do with gender at all. Intersex and trans people have many struggles in common, but if you're talking about trans-specific issues you really don't need to say "intersex and trans people".

Intersex people can be trans. Intersex people can also be cis. Intersex people, in the majority of countries, are assigned a gender at birth just like everyone else.

"Intersex" doesn't necessarily relate to genitals. When I say "sexual characteristics" it can also mean secondary sexual characteristics, hormone levels, chromosomes, and probably a bunch of other shit I forgot about. Please stop reducing intersex people to their genitals.

(On that note, having both working sets of genitals is at best extremely rare and at worst physically impossible. Sorry, intersex people can't fulfill your futa fantasies. Please stop tagging futa shit as intersex. The two are unrelated.)

Please. This pride month remember that intersex people like. Exist. Intersex folks are not hypotheticals they're not "that one letter we gotta tack at the end of every queer post and never think about any further" they're. People. Remember that they exist. Every year I have to make a post like this one where I explain the very basic things you can learn by reading the intersex wikipedia page because people see "intersex" and make assumptions as to what the word means without actually reading the dictionary definition. Please remember that intersex people exist, I looked up "intersex pride" on tumblr and half the posts I saw were a variation of "happy pride to people of all genders and sexualities!" when being intersex has nothing to do with either gender or sexuality. Please. I understand that you guys don't mean any ill, but I am very tired of making basic posts over and over.

And inb4 someone tries to strike dumb discourse on this post: I live in a country where it is legal and encouraged to perform surgery on intersex infants. Looking up "intersex athlete controversy" returned to me like three different cases of athletes who were coerced into surgery without being informed of all the risks and having to lead with lifelong consequences for it. When I say "remember intersex people" I don't mean "uwu intersex people are valid" I mean they're a demographic whose literal human rights are constantly spit upon. I don't give a shit if you think intersex people belong or not under the queer umbrella or what you think are the proper qualifications to identify as intersex literally everytime I talk to an intersex person I hear a variation of "my doctor straight-up lied to me to get me to undergo medical procedures to make me normal without my consent or input" I think people should be aware of that actually I think it's more important than arguing over labels.

[aloeverified]

i love all of @gin-juice-tonic's trans stan twins comics and i've centered all my gf beliefs around them, but i can't stop thinking about how funny it would be for stan to be a trans man and ford to be a trans woman.

imagine you're stan and you've been disowned for about ten years and haven't seen your family at all since, and during that time you've found and lost yourself more times than you can count, but you've finally settled on the fact that you're a man and it's time for you to transition. and then as soon as can finally start testosterone, your twin brother wants to see you ASAP.

and so you're stressed out the entire way there, not just because your brother seems to have gotten into some trouble, but because you have no clue how he's gonna react to you now being his brother.

only for him to not even notice or say a single thing about your new wardrobe that still has some of the tags from when you shoplifted it or about the scruff on your chin that you've been pretty proud of.

no, instead he's going on about the fbi and people who want to steal his skin or something.

and so everything happens the same way, and stan has essentially gotten the life he's always wanted: everyone thinks he's his genius brother, he's still in contact with his family (though stanford didn't exactly call home everyday so neither does he), and he's a man — and not one person doubts it. except he's not the man he's always wanted to be because he doesn't have his brother beside him throughout it all, becoming a man with him.

and then stanford comes back and is impossibly autistic and bitter so he just assumes stan went through the process of transition (assuming he used some gender changing potion he found noted about in the journal) just to further steal ford's identity.

and stan explains, no, you fucking idiot, i've been a man for thirty-something odd years and you just didn't notice because you were too busy being insane. and so yeah, that's how stan's whole coming out goes.

and ford just responds with, "oh. yeah, me too. she/they is fine."

[pressureplus]

sebby x transmasc reader headcanons? i'm feeling self indulgent today >:)

Whoo, Yeah! I'm finally getting to answer this one! I personally have little to no gender at any point in time, and my lovely Co-Star has all of the gender and fluctuates fairly regularly between the shiny genders they've collected. So this is written from the shared trans braincell, gotta support the homies ✨

(Hope you have a wonderful day!)

Sebastian Solace x Transmasc Reader

[Warnings: Transphobia and misgendering (neither one from Sebby) and mentions of Dysphoria]

◞꒷◟ ͜ ͜ ◞ྀི◟୨୧◞ྀི◟ ͜ ͜ ◞꒷◟◞꒷◟ ͜ ͜ ◞ྀི◟୨୧◞ྀི◟ ͜

• Honestly, this fish bastard couldn't care less

• Your gender, job, and species are COMPLETELY irrelevant to him, the ONLY thing he really cares about is whether or not you are going to buy his stuff

• His gender? Shopkeeper. Now give him your data-

• If it's not addressed, you are literally just another man that Urbanshade sent on a suicide mission, he really doesn't care what is or is not in your boxers

• Can't stress enough that he's ONLY supportive when you or someone else brings it up, Sebby never pushes the topic. If you didn't know you told him or that he found out, you'd honestly think he didn't know

• Now, are there ways this becomes relevant to him? No, absolutely not, you are just another guy that's going to buy an expensive flashlight and then die several terrible deaths.

• It's not until one of the other expendables starts to misgender you that he even seems to notice

• "She? I don't particularly see any women in my shop at the moment- If you're sick I'm going to have to ask you to leave so we don't catch whatever nasty thing you have."

• "I think you meant 'Him', as in 'I am going to hand Him my gun and look away when He makes you a stain on my tile'. Do you understand me, expendable?"

• "It's funny hearing someone only packing 3 inches try to decide what is and isn't a man. I think we all know his is bigger than yours is, so if you could shut up about it that would be great."

• Sometimes he's more sassy, sometimes more outwardly aggressive, and occasionally he tells someone off in a way that's a bit more on the side of entertaining, but he does always make a point to stick up for you

• If you need your hair cut, he'll do it. He cuts his own hair and has for the last decade, so he's actually pretty good at it! Better at messy styles, but he'll try a clean one if you really want him to

• "If you die because your hair is in your eyes, I won't get your data. You must understand this is to my own benefit, Y/N."

• Sebastian is... Starting to call you by your name. You're not sure when you stopped being an expendable like everyone else and started being the name you actually chose for yourself, but you've surely become different to him

• Sebastian was born a man, and handles issues regarding your situation completely casually unless it 100% HAS to be verbally brought up, so you are left completely confused by what you did to get closer to him like this

• Was it somewhere between him validating you or defending you? Was it when he sat with you for the first or third time while you were wrestling your disphoria? Was it trust, or maybe pity... It couldn't be pity, right?

• One day you'll find out he's sees himself in you

• He says it like a joke when he starts to talk about how they treat you differently when they don't understand you. Researchers treated him the same way a handful of the other people down here treat you.

• He knows it's not quite the same, but it feels the same for him sometimes. When they call him 'it' instead of he... Sometimes he calls himself an 'it' or a 'thing', too even though he knows he hates that. Do you feel that way when they call you a she? He'll just go ahead and start banning those people for you both, he doesn't like them anyway.

• He isn't comfortable in his own body anymore either. He didn't choose what he is now the same way you didn't choose what you were born as

• Sometimes, his body doesn't fit right, either. He hates that he understands that feeling, but he does...

• He's starting to get comfortable with that familiarity, and with maybe not feeling so alone

• Is it wrong of him to enjoy having found someone he can relate to? If even just a little?

• Sebastian knows it's probably awful of him, but he's making a point to be good to you for it

• It makes himself feel better for a while when you can connect like that so naturally...

• It makes him feel human again.

[genderqueerdykes]

trans men and women learn a lot from each other when we get close and it's a wonderful thing. it's okay to be dysphoric about manhood. it's okay to be dysphoric about womanhood. it's okay to not like he/him pronouns, to not like she/her pronouns. it's okay to not like how strangers gender you. it's okay to talk about these things with each other, to share mutual disgust, to see how it affects one another and how it shapes our identities and experiences.

it's okay to talk about the things that make you uncomfortable together. it's not invalidating each other's experiences to have conversations like saying "i'm so tired of being seen as a man no matter what, and being around people who treat me like a man" to a trans man and having the trans man respond by saying "i feel the same way about people who treat me like a woman" and agree to not project one's trauma on to the other

it's okay to be vulnerable. it's okay to admit when we don't understand certain parts of each others experiences, too. we do NOT have to act like experts and like we've "read the book" on what another person's gender is. even if we think we know a lot about that gender, we don't know everything, because we don't know everyone. literally. it's okay to go "i don't understand, but I'll call you whatever you identify as." and be receptive without knowing exactly what they mean.

we don't understand many things in life. that's fine. it's okay to just listen and not talk for once. you don't have to try to speak as though you've lived as a trans man when you're a trans women, and you don't have to speak for trans women if you're a trans man. we are allowed to advocate for our own experiences and simultaneously listen to other queer experiences and respect their boundaries, spaces, and needs.

there is a lot to learn about the challenges that trans women face, the unique struggles that come with some being raised as boys and the troubles that come with that, being seen as a feminine boy, being subjected to homophobia- getting called faggots and other slurs. some were raised as girls, some are intersex, and some are afab or other birth sexes, and the mixing of masculinity and femininity and cause a lot of issues when it comes to how society treats that person

there are lots of conversations that have to be listened to when it comes to the transmasculine experience and how nobody but transmasc people can articulate what it's like to live as a transmasculine person. no one can speculate on it, because it is such a unique experience. it is a complicated matter of several different types of prejudice that no one else can quite understand where it comes from and how it feels unless they've been there

it is so deeply rooted in misogyny, where people treat us like "stupid, confused women," like we're "destroying children" that we're 'destroying our bodies', that our hormones make us "unstable, irritable and emotional," and that we are unreliable narrators. we get called hysterical. we get told we're "ruining a pretty girl" or wasting our "pretty" features. we get lectured about how we need to be attractive and how testosterone will ruin that by our own parents. we get told we can't dress masc because it will make us "ugly" or "butch" or "dykes".

people hate it when we bind our breasts, cut our hair, hide our curves, change our gait, and stop wearing makeup. they lose a "girl" to ogle and become enraged, upset or uncomfortable. while the transmasc person is trying to navigate life in a way where they don't feel objectified, it becomes a matter of even worse objectification because now antimasculism is introduced into the mix and the experience becomes transandrophobia.

people are so hateful and bitter toward manhood and masculinity. people ask us "why would you EVER want to be a man? NOBODY wants to be a man." they tell us "men are ugly, violent, and mean." people tell us that men are sexual predators, that they're inherently abusive. people tell us that testosterone makes people ugly. they tell us that men aren't or can't be queer. they tell us we can't be a feminine man. they tell us we can't be men at all, that transmasculinity isn't even a thing, that transmanhood isn't a thing. we even get told that the only way to be trans is to be transfeminine, and what we are experiencing is a delusion, hysteria, or a result of us being hormonal from being on our periods and/or HRT.

when we listen to each others' experiences we realize how people who are othered by society are treated. we learn that not only we experiencing this, but so is everyone around us. we do not have to try to make one side's experience more important than another's. we can hold each other up by having conversations and being vulnerable about what's going on, how we're being treated, how we want to be treated, and how the community is failing us and how we can do better.

we deserve to have conversations. there's a lot to learn, a lot to laugh about, a lot to relate to, and a lot to be curious about. these conversations are good to have. it's good to admit when you know nothing about transmasculinity or transfemininity or any other identity. it's okay to ask respectful questions. it's okay to tell people when you appreciate their identities, and them explaining it to you. it's okay to just listen. it really is. we have to learn to listen it's not something that can be avoided perpetually for life. listening to someone else's conversation does not erase yours, it does not take it away from the equation. they exist together.

[sorryitsmyfirstdayonearth]

hii !!

how do u think sam would react in a gender swap situation? like would he avoid everyone or ask for advice from his partner ??

First of all, can we all acknowledge how absolutely, insanely beautiful Sam would be as a girl? Tall, muscular, dark hair and eyes, strong features? Wait, why am I on one knee? Where did this ring come from? 💍

Dean already calls Sam a girl 24/7, so nothing much would change in that regard. I feel like Sam would already have good understanding of the female body - not just from personal experience of ravishing yours, but also because Sam just knows stuff. I also headcanon him as a feminist ally, and that entails knowing things about what women have to deal with (cis women in this case, but Sam's a trans ally too, cause he's a good person ❤️).

Anyway, while it's of course reason to freak out if you wake up in a different body, Sam remains mostly cool. He takes note of the changes, of how differently people look at him, talk to him. He knew all that in theory, but experiencing it is something completely different. He throws you a couple of unbelieving looks, and what can you do but shrug?

Maybe it takes a few days to reverse the spell. Maybe you and Sam lie in bed at night and he's staring up at the ceiling. He can't believe how different the world seems. He's still him, but it's like everyone else has changed. Dean's even more protective than he usually is, but it doesn't feel good. It feels a little condescending, even though he knows his brother means well. It's like simultaneously everyone decided he's much more breakable while at the same time making him feel like being that is the most important part of him.

He feels you stir beside him, looks at you as you slowly open your eyes. You haven't changed how you behave. You're still just you, give him shit, tease him. You blink yourself awake and look at his face, the features there softer. He's a little bit shorter now, but you say you don't mind. Easier kissing distance.

Except you haven't done any kissing since all of this happened. Touching, yes, like holding each other at night. But it makes Sam wonder.

"Can't sleep?" you mutter, and Sam nods. Keeps looking at you, until he finds the courage to say what he wants to say.

"Why haven't you kissed me since all this?" he says, indicating his changed body with the arm that isn't around you. You move your head, the skin of your cheek rubbing against the pillow.

"I didn't know if you wanted me to," you reply, voice still scratchy from sleep. Sam chews his lip.

"Do you want to?" he asks. Your gaze roams over his face slowly.

"Sam, I always want you," you reply and it makes his heart flutter. "I always think you're beautiful."

Sam knows better than to get comfortable with stuff like this. Leaning into spells and the changes they cause, illusions they create - he knows better, and so do you. But he feels you shift, press yourself closer to him.

He kisses you before he can think about it for another second, pulls you close. Your hand goes to his cheek, then slowly wanders down.

The spell is broken and Sam's turned back the next day. He's surprised how happy he is to be back in his body, considering he and it haven't always had the best relationship. But he actually missed it. You take his hand, squeeze it. Things are back to normal.

Except you'll always have the memories. Except Sam will always know what it felt like to have your hand cup his breast, thumb swirling over his nipple. What it was like when your hand slipped into his PJ bottoms. The feeling of wetness between his thighs. How he had to stop kissing you when you touched him, his breath catching with the intensity of it, how different it was and at the same time not.

When Sam came with two of your fingers inside him, your palm pressed against him, he was sure for a second something was wrong. Nothing should feel that intense, right? He turned his face to you, kissed you deeply, desperately. Felt you grin that sinful grin against his lips.

"And the best part?" you whispered into his mouth, your hand already moving again. "We can go again right away."

Sam smiles at the memory now. And swears that he will make the most of this new found understanding.

This was so FUN! Thank you for this amazing ask, I hope it sort of did what you were hoping for? ❤️ Also now I just want to immediately write a bunch of gender swap smut. Dang it! 😄

[certifiedsexed]

Hi Cert. Sex Ed!!

I'm a trans guy, and I'm thinking of going on over the counter estrogen blockers. I can't start T officially yet bc I'm a minor. Most of the sources I've read mostly say that going on them gives you menopause-like symptoms, and you should only go on them to avoid getting breast cancer. Is this true? Is this dangerous for me? Are the side effects worth it/will I end up looking/feeling more masculine? Please help, tysm :)

Hi! <3

Okay, so I'm not sure what sources you're reading on puberty blockers but they do not cause everyone menopause-like symptoms and they're Not only for avoiding breast cancer!

I'd suggest researching "puberty blockers" specifically, not estrogen blockers. You'll find more accurate information that way, especially if you include "trans" in your search.

Now, let me say first: puberty blockers are not dangerous. There are disabled people who can't take puberty blockers for health-related reasons but puberty blockers are not generally dangerous.

They have been repeatedly proven to help trans people with gender dysphoria, suicidal idealation and overall depression.

[Here and here are actually two articles about studies on that!]

As for side effects, funnily enough, though puberty blockers often stop certain affects of puberty, they can also cause things often related to puberty, like moodiness, acne, weight gain, etc. They don't always cause those symptoms but it is possible.

They can cause menopause symptoms like hot flashes, headaches, etc. Its more likely if you're an older teen but its not a guarantee, or permanent.

The people I know who've voluntarily gone on puberty blockers have found it very helpful for finding gender euphoria. They won't necessarily make you look masculine but they can stop things like breast growth, your period and types of weight distribution.

They halt your puberty where it is now. Which a lot of minors find helpful for dealing with gender dysphoria and the discrimination they face trying to get access to hormones.

Whether it's worth it or not is up to you to decide. But keep in mind if you go on puberty blockers, you can stop whenever you want and your puberty will simply continue as it was going before if that's what you want.

Hope this helps, Anon! Let me know if you have any other questions. <3

[rottingmalice]

mizuena/ena5 incoherent rant below bc i love them so much im losing my mind

I can't stop thinking about how much of mizuki's conflict in prsk is resolved entirely by ena's actions, not mizuki's own, and that's actually really fucking good. hear me out.

One of the driving emotions for Mizuki's conflict is obviously fear; she's afraid of being left once people know her secret, she's afraid she can only ever have shallow connections with people who wouldn't really accept her as who she is, she's afraid of losing the few friends she has and the one space where she feels like she can express herself through their shared art.

But beyond that, the other driving emotion for her is guilt. She feels guilty that she's been "deceiving" everyone else, she feels guilty that she's left Ena waiting for so long without telling her her secret, she feels guilty that everyone else seems to be moving forward and facing their fears while she seemingly can't. And when her secret is revealed, the strongest emotion she's going through isn't her fear of being left behind, it's the guilt that's been eating her away from the inside.

She tells ena that it can't be the same, that now ena won't be able to treat her the same, that she knows Ena and Kanade and Mafuyu are so kind they'll smile and tell her they're fine with it, but that they'll just be forcing themselves for the sake of kindness. That they'd rather not have to deal with everything that makes Mizuki complicated, but they would anyway because they're kind like that. That she can't bear that. She doesn't deserve that.

And all of this guilt is so real for this young trans girl to feel because it's what we're pushed towards constantly, even when we're supposedly accepted for who we are. The lie that we're deceiving others when we present as our own gender is so deeply written into our collective psyche, and even beyond that, even in "progressive" spaces, the violence we suffer is often treated as our own burden to bear, as something we have to deal with and not burden other people with.

So many basic bitch stories about trans women, with trans women protags written by cis people, have them struggle and "grow" as the story progresses, having to "face their fears", to come out to people they're scared of leaving them, to "trust their loved ones" and take that first step. I think a lot about The Missing, a game that gets a lot of the horror of being a trans girl and yet still has the protagonist, who is so terrified of how her mom would react to her coming out she tries to end her own life, learn the lesson that she should come out anyway, trust this person that's only given her reasons to fear her, because that's the only way for her to move forward.

Mizuki doesn't do that. She doesn't have to. Mizu5 is all about the horror of being outed before you're ready to come out yourself, even to someone you know would show you kindness. And it allows Mizuki to stew in her own guilt, the guilt that she never faced her fears herself, that she's burdening N25 with her suffering. But Ena5 is about Ena, so patient and unwilling to hurt Mizuki, finally being moved to action by kaito and meiko agreeing that it's up to her to be selfish and try to bring Mizuki back, to recognize that Mizuki doesn't want to be alone.

It's up to Ena to do the scary thing, for her to be open and vulnerable about her feelings. For her to go up to Mizuki, despite being ignored for so long, as someone who is so sensitive to being ignored- to being rejected- and to tell Mizuki what she needs- and deserves- to hear. That she's wanted. That Ena doesn't care if Mizuki thinks she deserves it or not, that Mizuki's guilt shouldn't factor in because Ena wants Mizuki beside her.

It's the ultimate transfem fantasy because it's the fantasy of being truly wanted, of being unconditionally loved. It's the fantasy of someone seeing you for who you are, and not just "accepting you" as if it's a favor they're doing you, but going as far as telling you that the way you've been conditioned by a lifetime of violence to feel and act to protect yourself is NOT your fault, it's NOT just your responsibility to deal with, that you deserve someone who will go through the effort of digging you out of that hole and that you're not a burden for needing that.

In a lot of subtle ways, Mizuki's story feels 1000% written by people who understand trans girls so far beyond the scope of the usual explaining-transness-to-cis-people style of narrative, even understanding ways that these narratives fuck up routinely and also understanding exactly what is needed to sneak this into a highly commercial hatsune miku gacha game. There's a lot of compromises made there for the sake of being this kind of story in this kind of game, but what we get in return is so much more meaningful as a transfem narrative than anything of similar popularity that I can think of, it fills me with so much emotion and I truly can't fathom believing it's somehow "bait" or "not real rep" unless you've never had to think about transmisogyny and how it emotionally affects you to this degree.

I'll never stop thinking about them. Congrats on the wedding mizuki and ena. someone like ena is exactly what every trans girl deserves, and never has someone proven herself more deserving of a trans girl's love than ena. i love them both so much my heart feels like it's going to explode whenever i think of them. huge thanks to everyone involved in creating their story

[genderkoolaid]

So odd to see people deny that trans mascs experience physical violence?? I have no legal record of how I was homeless because I couldn't go to any shelters. They are sex segregated in my city and I was warned by my social worker and shelter employees (both trying to do me a genuine favor) that I'd be beaten for being trans masc (I'm butch not even a man) and later when I asked a former admin the most she could muster was "...they'd try to protect you. But they wouldn't be able to stop anyone." And this was explicitly because I'm trans masc, butch, and can't pass as a gender conforming woman anymore (medical transition). I was direct about being AFAB and butch with everyone I talked to. I was still warned. (And on the systemic oppression end of things - bc I never went to a shelter I was/am intelligible for rapid rehousing programs, specific benefits programs, social and financial support programs, and student loan benefits. Just spent a few weeks in a car until my situation improved.)

Yeah, this aligns with what I've read about transmasc experiences with sex-segregated shelters. Both men and women's shelters can be unsafe for us to be in (almost like we're trans or something....)

[foone]

One thing I think about a lot is that how omegaverse is a sort of meta-setting that can and has been applied to many different fandoms, right?

So there's "omegaverse supernatural" (because that's where it started) and "omegaverse star trek" and "omegaverse Frasier" and "omegaverse Batman" and "omegaverse US presidents".

You can basically easily apply it to any fandom with lots of men in it, which turns out to be most of them. (and you can apply it to the rare female-majority fandoms with a bit of extra work).

But the interesting thing to me is that omegaverse depends on characters having subgenders: alpha/beta/omega are effectively gender roles on top of the regular male/female ones, but they're ones not specified in the original fiction, right? (I mean, not usually).

So like, you can watch NewsRadio and it makes it pretty clear Dave is a man, but it never specifies if he's an alpha or omega, because why would it? Also, why is my go-to example of a random sitcom one from 1995?

Anyway. So you've got a bunch of characters with canonical genders (not that that has ever stopped fans from headcanoning them as different! Dave is a trans man, Lisa is a trans woman, and Bill? All Phil Hartman characters are closeted trans women, so jot that down), but you don't have canonical subgenders.

So fans have to decide which characters in a fiction are alphas and omegas and so on. They tend to be pretty consistent for most characters, actually.

But the part that interests me despite not really reading omegaverse stuff is just those headcanons.

Like, I can take a show I know well, like say Star Trek: The Next Generation, and find out what the fans think their subgenders are.

Like, I'm gonna guess that Riker and Worf are alphas. Picard could go either way. LaForge is an omega, Data is... An android, but he's had sex, so... I'm gonna guess alpha? O'Brien is an omega, but that's mostly going off DS9. Maybe he wasn't in TNG yet? Wesley I'm guessing gets headcanoned as omega.

And see, now I can go look at ao3 and see what other people think for these! And for some reason that's way more interesting to me than just reading any omegaverse fic.

I think we should do more of this sort of shit. I mean, I guess we kinda do for things like top/bottom, dom/sub, trans/cis, but I demand more subgenders! Subgenders that aren't depicted in the fiction but fans have to headcanon.

I kinda want to make a sort of wiki website which works by scraping ao3 tags and assigning alpha/beta/omega to characters from shows, basically a fan vote on how people headcanon the subgenders of these characters.

Anyway I checked and oh boy yeah everyone says Wesley is an omega. Apparently Zefram Cochrane is an omega too.

And the one fic I saw with Data in it made him an omega. Huh. Interesting.

I dunno. It's weird: I've got no interest in reading a fic where these characters fuck in their weird omegaverse ways, but I can't not be interested in knowing how fans headcanon them.

[velvetvexations]

I can't help but see a striking similarity between transfem TRFs and the fuckin tradwife "coquette" "pink job/blue job" girlies like

Yes, the role assigned to your gender works beautifully FOR YOU. Forgive me if I'm not exactly thrilled that you refuse to stop forcing the whole worldview that makes it a "default" on ME because you can't feel #valid without convincing yourself that your experience is fucking universal.

Forgive me, ma'am, if I don't feel the need to treat you less like a person and more like precious unobtanium just because YOU feel more protected than objectified that way, let alone if I get really fucking skeeved out that you seem to think that requiring me to go through a cis man for MY healthcare decisions is more protective than oppressive and abusive. Forgive me if I'm not as convinced as you are that gynecological healthcare is a solved issue just because YOUR singular self-hating "theyfab" friend has a good doctor. Forgive me if I'm not convinced that your belief that it is my divine duty to live my life as a cold, stoic meat shield for every poor, defenseless, incompetent damsel in distress by virtue of being a man is as #feminist as you're trying to sell it as.

I get it. You feel neglected. You feel exposed. You feel unprotected and vulnerable. But stop just making up reasons to double down on what FEELS good immediately that basically amount to "women do X and men do Y and men are ALWAYS stronger than women and HAVE to be more responsible and if you say this ISN'T a rigid rule we all must follow you're INVALIDATING MY WOMANHOOD" fucking skill issue. Or are you telling me that every #girlboss you stan isn't a Real Woman either? Like these ideas don't become feminist just because you, personally, don't want to be hatecrimed (but think it should happen to OTHER people more often).

I'm a trans woman and I approve of this message! Everyone can reblog this justifiably angry statement with a trans woman backing it up!

Repeat after me: We should all protect each other. We are siblings. We are each other's guardian angels. I will do everything I possibly can for other trans people safe in the knowledge that they will do the same for me.

[drdemonprince]

so first off, sorry bc this is super fucking heavy.

re: commonalities between cis and trans men, and that other ask. something I've had to come to terms with is how even as a teenager before I had the concept of transitioning in my head - I still got all of the societal messaging wrt misogyny, etc. I totally benefited from it, even as a woman. I put other girls down. I was the cool chick. I cashed in where I could with it. i was absolutely a chauvinist when I transitioned. I felt inhuman as a woman, but I understood that ultimately that's the way women were *supposed* to be, as much as I wished otherwise. it took a long time to unlearn that.

my personal experience makes me very uncomfortable when I see other trans men talking about gendered socialization, or how overly negative people are towards men as a class. I wonder if they have ever sat down and really reconciled with the way they have, and do, benefit from their gendered position, or if they've convinced themselves they can't be a "bad person" by virtue of their birth sex.

I can't find a nuanced way to talk about this that won't be read in bad faith as essentialist rhetoric. rape culture is the system by which consent violation is normalized, its all the music and books and movies and bad relationships I assumed were normal and romantic as a young adult. I really, really hurt people, and I did it as men are encouraged to do, and as they are rewarded for doing. I found affirmation in hurting people, and it is so fucking easy to do this without even really thinking of it because it's the entire culture you've come up in.

I'm not even talking like, obvious cases here like phyrical domestic abuse & intentional date rape. there are so many subtle boundary erosions, there's weird gray areas around drugs & alcohol, there's attitudes and expectations in established relationships, there's the potential to exploit community for personal gain. there are partners who will fear you, and freeze and fawn and will not tell you "no."

a lot of the "we need a special word for masculine transphobia" types seem to also disavow the possibility that they hold male privelege. but we need to look at that shit, sexual or otherwise. it's scary to see guys who see women talking about it and they knee-jerk shout back "I'm not a rapist" and "not all men." guarantee some of them are, and just aren't aware of it. i was.

Thank you so much anon for this really brave, candid message. I think it's something that a lot of the trans guys crowing in my inbox about how cis men "are the bad gender" need to hear. (yes, someone literally said that to me). Portraying gendered categories, especially ones based on birth assignment!, as ontologically more evil or pure than others sets people up for abuse. Separating cis men out from trans men erases the ways in which trans guys can both leverage power and the ways in which toxic masculine norms are transmitted culturally to everyone regardless of assigned sex at birth. Lots of trans guys are palpably uncomfortable with their power, and can only see that relative to cis men, they experience transphobia and misogyny in greater amounts, and so they presume they must be in a highly victimized category. But they dont ever consider that as men they can and do often wield power over women -- especially trans women -- and they've got to fucking learn how to handle that reality responsibly, which many cis men actually do know how to fucking do. Especially multiply marginalized cis men who have been preyed upon and exploited themselves.

I think it's really powerful to hear you taking ownership of the actions you've taken that have hurt others, and the allure such actions had. Very few people have the courage to look their lower moments in the face and affirm that it's actually a part of them. If we're ever going to stop abusing and talking over women we've got to own up to our shit. I've seen what can happen when men come together to be vulnerable about their struggles, own their wrongdoing, and seek to change -- back when I was working in a men's drug treatment program. We can overcome this shit and take responsibility. But a lot of the birthday boy trans guy squad is incensed by even the idea of owing anything to anyone. Like a lot of MRAs.

[busket]

trans men i say this with love: we NEED to stop acknowledging comments from transphobes saying stuff like "you'll never be a real woman" and acting like it's sooo funny that transphobes can't tell that we aren't trans women, and being like "omg they tried to insult me but they were accidentally gender affirming!! like thank you!! 🤣"

we can laugh at transphobes for saying "we can always tell" despite being dumb as shit and never being able to tell. and I recognize that humor is a kneejerk response to someone attempting to insult you and failing horribly. but the joke is at the expense of trans women, they get caught in the crossfire. you're telling our trans sisters "omfg this person was incredibly VIOLENT to me because they thought I was YOU! isnt that funny? they tried to insult ME with the insult that is meant for YOU!" that's not funny. that's not kind.

and you know that transphobe is copypasting that hateful comment to everyone they read as trans, including trans women, and they're looking for a reaction. because that is what bullies want! you block and you move on. tell your friends if you really need to vent. you don't need to remind trans women that they are under fire for being hypervisible in our community. solidarity is not hard.

[genderqueerdykes]

I very recently came out as a trans man and I'm honestly starting to feel a little broken by everyone's reaction to us. My family are steadfastly ignoring my transition, using she/her and my deadname like it's going to go away if they ignore it long enough. Several of my friends have started make jokes like "are you sure you want to be a man?" When we're discussing their shitty ex-boyfriends like becoming a man is going to make me the same as the abusive cunts they dated. And then I come to Tumblr and everyone is talking about how trans men are oppressors who never experience specific discrimination and benefit from misogyny from the second they come out. Despite the fact that I'm built like Barbie and the binder is fooling precisely no one so if someone could show me exactly where I'm benefiting from misogyny that would be nice. At this point I just. Don't want to do this anymore. I made it to 30 without realising I was trans, maybe it wouldn't be so hard to just shove it all back in the box and not deal you know? I know realistically I can't but I really want to just go back to how I was before and pretend I never realised.

i'm sorry you're dealing with this right now. you're definitely not alone. i get so many messages just like this from other trans men. i'm glad you felt like sharing your story. it's really important for people to share their experiences with this right now.

Several of my friends have started make jokes like "are you sure you want to be a man?"

people are literally criticizing trans men for coming out. of course i'm sure i want to be a man, i am one. on no planet is that a bad thing. and even if i weren't sure, i should be able to decide whether or not it's right for me. people instantly correlating "man" with "oppressor" is missing the point. this isn't helping anyone. making trans men feel like shit for wanting to come out and/or transition isn't "helping women". it's not helping anyone. it's making those trans men miserable and everyone really should care.

you should care about the feelings of trans men.

people who try to tell you nobody but "the most oppressed members" of the trans community are the only ones who are allowed to talk or whatever are full of shit. transmasculine erasure needs to come to an end. people need to stop bullying us out of wanting to come out or transition. this isn't okay. it's not okay to harass people for their gender or belittle them. i'm so sorry you've been treated like this.

you're still allowed to be who you are and be proud of that as well. my advice is to try to talk to other transmascs and men when and where possible, especially those who don't self flagellate. sticking together right now is very important. stay safe. you deserve to be treated better.