#i will pipe bomb you

[duothings]

Reincs Roadtrip From Hell (2351 words) by DuoTrauma Chapters: 3/? Fandom: Original Work Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Original Character(s)/Original Character(s), Original Character(s) & Original Character(s) Characters: Original Characters, Reinc Zero Cimex (OC), Time | Typhus (OC), Aelius (OC), KMA10 | K | Luck (OC), Sciz (OC), Anpu (OC), Akari Cad (OC), Eryn (OC) Additional Tags: Road Trips, Original Character(s), Original Fiction, Major Original Character(s), Original Character-centric, POV Original Character, Original Universe, Original Mythology, Minor Original Character(s), Fluff, Found Family, How Do I Tag, no beta we die like SPACE, ocs getting displaced in space time for my amusment, Violence, defenestration (throwing someone through a window), lots of curse words, also reinc using fictional gods names in vain multiple times, Time Travel, Dimension Travel, earth has no idea whats coming for them, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff and Crack, Minor Character Death, all the characters that die are unnamed and only show up for a few sentances, original magic system Series: Part 1 of InterTempus Summary:

time goes on a vacation, so they send any freaks that could mess with the timeline while theyre away to earth to go on a roadtrip (this cant go wrong at all)

this whole thing is self indulgent oc crack, i could talk about my ocs and their world and world building and magic systems all day lets hope i tagged this right

[moeblob]

No fun allowed.

[youvebeengalindafied]

Why did you call Elphaba a violent terrorist? I don’t recall her ever attacking anyone in the show - thought that was just the Wizard’s propaganda??

SHE VERY FAMOUSLY TRIED TO MURDER A TWELVE YEAR OLD OVER SOME SHOES

[its-a-me-mango]

anYTHING FOR THE BIIIIIIT

*magically impregnates you*

im so sorry tumblr this was funnier when it was an inside joke on discord

...

Hey Nova, here's my epic art of Hexy dying in a glue trap just for you, peace and love on planet earth! <3

[cyberdragoninfinity]

rin: actively getting annoyed that yugo's just going around giving free hugs to all the bgirls

also rin: immediately bristles and flips out at the mere suggestion that she and yugo are 'going out'

ALSO RIN: IS CONSTANTLY TALKING ABOUT HER BOND WITH YUGO AND ALSO HER UNLOCK SPEECH IS ALL ABOUT HOW SHE WANTS TO CHASE HER DREAMS WITH YUGO

(not to mentioned her one duel win voiceline where she's like "if my closest friend never gives up, neither can i!!)

my aromantic ass: GIRL I KNOW WHAT YOU AAAREEEEEEEEEE!!!

ARO RIN TRUTHISM BEGINS NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PEACE ON EARTH!!!!!!

[stump-not-found]

This idea has been haunting me and I wanted to ask if there is any truth in it. My head canon is that every year on their “anniversary” Ford and Bill have an unspoken “truce” where Ford doesn’t try to kill Bill for the day and Bill does his best not to torture Ford. They just get to be cute and romantic then resume their usual crazy shenanigans the very next day. Thoughts?

flip it & you've got it about right

[silverware-is-interesting]

Random things related to object shows

bleugh

[leaderofmany]

Yo if any of yall in germany hanging out in an abandoned hospital rn you better gtfo bruh the security crackers r looking for yall

[boatboysrowout]

i am So Very Interested in the burger king vs mcdonalds au if you're willing to share more 👁️👁️

i'm so glad you asked

it's all grian's fault, of course. 'it'll be great if all my friends got a summer job around the same place!' he said. 'it'll be fun hanging out on our lunch breaks!' he said. 'this is a genius idea, nothing will go wrong!' he said.

it goes wrong in less than a day.

it all starts with scar's job application getting rejected from burger king. he takes this very personally, as the man who interviews him is grian's friend who had just been hired the day before, and scar had been assured he would get an easy in. ren, however, didn't like how many questions scar was asking about their ice cream machine and where their security cameras were placed.

so out scar goes, sulking his way through a successful interview to work at the white castle down the road, joining bdubs and cleo. the rest of grians friends end up scattered in shops around the two restaurants with varying degrees of satisfaction with their summer jobs.

grian, as he is wont to do, waffles around a bit before committing to a job. he's pretty sure he's going to join bigb at the library, but before he decides, he goes to pay scar a visit to make sure he's still not sulking about the burger king fiasco.

that, too, is a mistake.

grian doesn't know what happened. he swears he just meant to stop in and say hi. and maybe play a little prank! just a funny little joke! only he didn't realize how much hair spray bdubs uses and how flammable that made his hair, and really, how could grian have known that the second after he fled the scene of his crime, scar would walk in at the exact wrong moment holding a lighter, making him look like the guiltiest motherfucker on earth?

it's absolutely not his fault.

but.

now scar is out of a job again, and he's gotten it in his head that the only way to get his revenge on ren is to work at the mcdonalds across the street from the burger king and, to quote scar, "make him regret not taking my offer." and listen. this is the third job scar's had in two days. it kind of feels a little bit like grian's responsibility to make sure he doesn't get fired from this one too. but it'll be fine. what else could go wrong?

so much. so, so much.

scar almost immediately goes off the rails. he creates his own customer rewards program in which he refuses to serve a customer if they don't pledge their undying loyalty to the mcdonalds in exchange for scar certified McReputation points. this somehow is remarkably successful despite grain's repeated warnings that this is a scam- scar pulls some strings and grian is forced into kitchen duty after he tries to warn one too many customers. martyn and ren catch word of this and try institute a similar program, albeit to a much less successful degree. scar, however, cannot let that stand.

grian also cannot let that stand, but this is more due to martyn coming over every day during his lunch break and annoying grian by telling increasingly convoluted jokes all ending with a punchline relating to the mcdonald's broken ice cream machine.

so that afternoon grian and scar pay the burger king a visit. scar goes up to the front counter and gives ren and martyn the longest sales pitch of his life, something about cereal, and while they're distracted grain climbs through the drive through window and smashes their ice cream machine with a baseball bat.

that's the beginning of the end.

ren takes the attack way too personally. he gets naked, makes martyn crown him with a shitty cardboard crown, dubs himself the burger king, and declares war on the mcdonalds.

he and martyn set out to recruit for their army amongst the rest of their friends in the area to varying degrees of success. they first go to visit joel in his art shop, but quickly decide to leave after the first thing they hear upon walking in is a conversation in the back room in which someone appears to be blackmailing joel over something in the basement.

they decide to try impulse and tango down at the arcade, and both of them are so confused by ren's sales pitch they just agree to make him go away (they do the same thing when scar and grian visit them a few hours later).

ren and martyn's visit to the white castle is the worst yet. instead of walking in and recruiting bdubs and cleo with their impassioned speech and thirst for justice, the burger king and his hand walk into an active warzone.

there's smoke everywhere. bdubs is screaming. martyn swears he hears a gun go off. cleo is cackling. someone runs past them entirely engulfed in flames. as ren and martyn make a hasty retreat etho cheerfully greets them from his seat on a bench outside the building, tinkering with something that looks suspiciously like a pipe bomb.

they decide to take a break from recruiting after that.

meanwhile, scar and grian have been busy. they've recruited jimmy and scott from the florists down the road to launch a yelp smear campaign against the burger king, tanking them from a respectable 3.8 stars to 1 star in an afternoon. to a normal human being, this would mean nothing, but they text a screenshot of this to martyn and ren with the caption 'this u?'

martyn and ren have never once reacted to anything normally or proportionality in their life.

skizz, one of their regulars, also takes great offense to this. he insists that this is a devastating blow against the burger king's honor, and vows to get revenge.

no one's sure exactly how he does it, but within an hour he manages to trace one of the bad reviews back to jimmy and promptly doxes him, getting him fired due to the content of his surprisingly popular google+ account.

scar and grian, after laughing hysterically for an hour over the fact that jimmy was a google+ influencer, continue their reign of terror over the burger king by taking a selfie of them next to the burger king drive through menu, which they somehow have relocated to the roof of the mcdonalds.

it's the last straw for ren.

decked out in a red cape made of the burger king curtains and armed with a spatula and the fury of a thousands suns, ren marches across the street to the mcdonalds and challenges scar and grian to a winner-takes-all duel.

a crowd begins to gather, with nearly everybody grian knows save for the people involved in what has been dubbed the white castle war, forming a loose arch behind ren and martyn as they begin to chant for a fight.

grian and scar, who came outside to see what all the commotion was about, both predictably panic at the sight of two men in capes charging towards them backed by a crowd chanting for blood. grian tries to claw his way back up the roof while scar, possessed by the spirit of apollo, does the only thing he can and chucks a potato at ren's head.

that potato hits ren square in the forehead and knocks him out cold.

the crowd goes silent.

martyn, thinking ren is dead, drops to his knees and cradles his unconscious body close to his chest and dramatically confesses his everlasting love, vowing to never leave ren's side and to never stop spreading the tale of ren's 'grey long and strong' bits.

grian, upon witnessing this, realizes to his abject horror that he also has gay feelings for his manager.

he has no idea what to do with these feelings, and the crowd is still chanting fight, and he's experienced a lot of stress and unexpected emotions in the last five minutes, so he really can't be blamed when he turns on his heel and punches scar in the face.

scar, surprised but absolutely willing to go along with it, punches grian back, and they begin beating the shit out of each other in the most pathetic fist fight a mcdonalds parking lot has ever witnessed.

meanwhile, there's police cars and fire trucks with sirens on speeding down the road past them, and someone in the crowd realizes 'oh shit are those all going to the white castle?'

so the crowd immediately abandons the world's worst fight to go see what the hell has been going down in the white castle.

it takes a bit, but, with martyn still confessing his love and sobbing over ren's unconscious body, grian finally manages to land a lucky hit and knocks scar out, sending him crumpling to the ground. for the second time that day, grian realizes with horror what he's done, and frantically tries to run to get a medic only to trip over scar's unconscious body and knock himself out as well.

The headline of the local newspaper the next morning reads as follows:

...anyone wanna ask me about my last life mall au

[loneliness-of-spring]

For all your Valentine's Day needs (THIS IS A JOKE. HAVE FUN WITH YOUR PARTNERS OR FRIENDS OR YOURSELVES GUYS. HAPPY VALENTINE'S!!!)

Also, my requests are open!!!

Textless version:

[PLEASE DO NOT STEAL, REPOST, OR USE FOR COMMERCIAL PURPOSES.]

[gojinka]

Actually I don’t care if people are horny towards my characters… Like that’s literally a fish with fat tits I don’t give a shit what ppl feel towards that.

[illarian-rambling]

Channeling the spirits of my smartest ocs to help me pass this exam because jesus fucking christ O_O

[thebad-lydrawn-sanses]

ARSON GETS TO WHAT?! NO!!

SEND IN ALL UNITS! GET THE CHOPPER! RELEASE THE K9s! ALL SQUADRONS, LOCATE THAT PERPETRATOR AT ONCE.

- 👮

Yes ma’am!

- 👮‍♂️👮‍♂️👮‍♂️👮‍♂️👮‍♂️👮‍♂️👮‍♂️👮‍♂️👮‍♂️🐶🐶🐶🐕🐕🐕🚁

German Shepherd Dog: (barking)

Civilian 1: what the dog doin?

Civilian 2: when you die and it's time to weigh your soul, the table it's on is going to shatter under the weight of your sins

[starlos-soulmate]

okay I don’t go here (undertale) so i may have missed some stuff from his sprite but i was scrolling the tl with artblock, saw ur posts about wanting art, and blacked out and woke up with this in my possession. enjoy

also didn’t feel like drawing a real gun so he’s giving finger guns now

[mechaseraph]

Sincerely wish for Kaito Kid to explode

[oddtripps]

I think ppl have to stop complaining to my face about how I draw YG cute when I yassify Roy to this extreme.

like. Who even is this man?? Not my alcoholic puppet father who will eat people on a whim. Not a borderline sex pest who ignores his kid and lives rent free in the walls. Not someone who has several restraining orders and eats out of the trash.

I just can’t draw balding ppl and like…..my best attempt at him was from months ago. And he’s STILL got more hair than canon.

I just like em old and unwashed and creepy with greasy shoulder length hair is that too much to ask for 😔😔😔