#i will not say i wasnt ever like that but like i grew lmao

[mostlikelyshutup]

reading zutara fic sometimes is like ah yes you dont understand aang at all do you

[sonknuxadow]

sorry i dont really understand the hyping up the mario movie as this incredible masterpiece of a movie or the best video game movie ever made i finally watched it recently and i just thought it was ok. not Bad there were things i enjoyed about it. but not best movie of the year or best video game movie that will ever be made and can never ever be topped idk what people are talking about there

[badgyalshii]

ITS NEVER OVER | II

Paul Atreides x Reader (always safe for POCS+ Plus size)

2.6k word count

warnings! idk really you tell me lmao. just sad really, flashbacks, etc. proofread, uhhh most of it.

A/N: im so happy i got the results that I did in the first part, im thinking of starting a taglist for this series maybe so just send me an ask saying you wanna be in there and i gotchuuuu! thank you to everyone who reads my stories, i was supposed to post this yesterday but i was pretty busy. i am overall happy with how this series is going! i was gonna leave it simple and end it here, but honestly i feel like i could keep going with this, love you guysss!😘

Access Part I here. I . II . III . IV .

¨its just protocol¨ ¨it wasnt necessary, i watched. Ive watched you, standing behind you. Who are you, paul?¨

¨y/n? Helloooo, y/n¨ chani waved her hand in your face as the memory slowly faded and you came back to your vision and seeing chani infront of you. You both laid on the small bed, hot when the sun was up or down. Chani wanted more, she swore she did. When she wasnt talking to you she was searching for something to make this ¨house¨ feel comforting, like a home. You closed your eyes as the flashback completely faded in your head. You both were laying down, she was across from you with a worried look on her face as you blinked. ¨yes chani?¨ ¨are you prepared?¨ she asked. You struggled to remember what she was talking about, and her concerned look never left her face. ¨To leave¨ chani whispers gently. She knew you still had feelings for paul, and she couldnt fight to win you over in your constant mental battle. You never felt like this before. Wanting only one person- no, needing them. Under your eyes grew heavier and heavier. Days grew longer and you hardly slept and when you did it was of paul, had you have no life of your own? Have you grown depressed? You sighed, stood and you dressed, taking a deep breath in as you pulled up your pants and grabbed your mask.

Its been 6 years, 6 years on arrakis with chani, and you never forgot. You never forgot the life that you used to have, the life you missed so deprately, and you never came to terms with your new life, even if it was with chani. You missed stilgar, you missed everyone, grouped together, eating, small laughs between you and your friends, paul picking at your plate whenever you didnt really feel like finishing your food. You loved chani, you love her, youve became closer and closer like sisters. She taught you her own individual skills that shes learned along the way, but you guys barely talked. Her company was comforting, but all you really thought about was paul, and his new marriage, and his new wife. Was it just…..protocol? You could tell when you spoke to chani that she was extremely uninterested in the topic of paul, but thats all you ever thought about.

You found another place in arrakis, it took about 6 sandworms to get to your destination and you lived in once again, another large rock. You and chani hunted for water and when you found it you both started to make another ¨tent¨ in the rock to live at for a while. You both sat down and ate.

¨whats on your mind?¨ chani asked worryingly, she worried, she worried so often. She only wanted whats best for you and it hurt to see you this way but she covered it with her toughness. ¨paul. Maybe he was right-¨ ¨y/n, it has been six years since then. Please-¨

¨maybe… i should go¨ you thickly swallowed, looking at your hands before you looked back up at her. Her jaw was clenched before she released it, she has an irritated look on her face before she released her eyebrows. ¨im coming with you”

As you got dressed to go back to him, you thought of him. Maybe it was because of the way he laughed so softly against your lips that made you miss him. Maybe its because of how his warm and rough fingers softly grazed your face and on your body sending butterflies in your stomach and tiny shocks wherever his loving touch landed, eager to touch you, the way his green but now electric blue eyes looked at you with pure admiration. He was so perfect. Everything you wouldbe thought you wanted on paper was right infront of you, waiting on you. You couldnt lie, you were excited to see him and thankful chani allowed you to go back. You wondered about him, wondered how he looked now, was he more mature? Did his voice get deeper? was it just protocol? Did you make a mistake? Is he safe? Is he still there? Does he still love you?

Anxiety crept through your throat before you swallowed it back down. Chani was already ready to go as soon as she shes going with you. You looked at her, she was sitting outside of the giant rock, waiting for you and if she wasnt already so smart, she turned feeling eyes on her back almost as if she could sense you, one eyebrow raised as she then crossed her arms and leaned on her left foot. You sighed before picking up your things, walking up to chani she put her hand on your shoulder and patted it. ¨can we just sit here? we just got here! look at the view¨ she said before crossing her arms again and looking at you with a smile.

The view was clearly beautiful. The sun coming down as it usually does but in this particular rock, there was something different about the scenery. ¨pretty cool for a shit planet¨ you muttered, dropping your things before you got down and sat criss cross. Chani joined you, enjoyed the view for a little longer before she looked over at you.

¨why do you like him so much, Paul?¨ she questioned kindly, usually she didnt like talking about him, she was never a fan. You looked at her, studying her face you could see she had a serious face beside her eye slightly winched from the sun, she waiting on your answer before she lifting her knee and laid on her elbow. you sighed before sitting with your legs flat out with your hands in your lap, it wasnt a hard question, it just caught you off guard. Why were you so attracted to him? . ¨i….i dont know, actually¨ you looked back into the view, chewing on the side of your cheek before continuing. ¨its not everyday you get a new comer who is so emotionally strong but you could see he is so lost in those gorgeous eyes. Someone so intelligent, beautiful, kind, and wise. Who wants to learn and is¨ you did an exaggerated sigh before raising your fingers to quote ¨so humble, as stilgar says¨ chani laughs before laying flat out. ¨he was new, wasnt like us. us growing up, we were used to the same routine, everyone around everyone. So when he got here, when he wanted me.. I just…felt…different. Everything felt different¨ a small smile played on your face as you thought of him.

“ever thought of kids?” paul asked, playing with your hair. “why are you thinking of kids in your current situation, paul? wouldnt that be too much?” you reply, your arm laid across him and your head in his chest. he chuckled in return, you felt his heartbeat skip and pitter patter before you felt the vibrations from his voice, “i wouldnt wanna have a kid unless its yours, y/n” and with that you smiled and looked up at him, pressing a kiss to his lips before he wrapped his arms around your waist to flip you guys over, you both chuckled before paul pulled up the sheets.

You wanted to feel his warm embrace again. You wanted him again. ¨i had a vision- well a dream that one day, he would be ruler. Be so wise and so gentle, which he already is. But i would be at his side, carrying his kids. Happy family. Getting to see his eyes… looking into him and only seeing love, i wouldnt ever grow tired of it. Y/N atredies, queen of atredies, me and him. You and stilgar, everyone around each other. Happy family, happy life. Of course war, but-¨ you cut yourself off, ¨i just want love, ever since i experieced it with him, its hard to let go. He teached me genuine love, nothing less, nothing more. The way he was so honest. How could i ever let that go?¨ you questioned, a puzzled look on your face as you waited on chani to answer. She took a pause, she once again looked back at the view before looking at you.

¨you do understand that he isnt the same anymore, right?¨”she said, looking up. ¨i understand,¨ you nodded, ¨ and i saw it, when he said he was waiting for me. He changed when he drunk the water of life. I dont think he really… values relationships anymore. I remember, i remember before he drunk the water, way before. He would tell me about these nightmares he had and how he was going to do everything to stop it¨ you pursed your lips to the side, as the conversation flowed, your confidence in your relationship was going lower and lower. As much as you didnt want to hear it, you needed to. ¨he lost himself, y/n¨ chani says. ¨are you sure when you walk back into his life hes gonna be the same old paul?¨

You bit your lip before looking down at your hands and let out a breath, ¨thats what were going to find out, right?¨ ¨to be honest,¨ chani sighed and put her hands behind he head, looking at the ceiling of the rock. ¨ i dont really trust him, never did. nor do i like him. He took advantage of us y/n. Tricked us, making us fight for him¨ chani said without filter. ¨he is the preacher, its written. I believe in him¨ you said pridefully, showing humility as you will always stand behind your one true love. ¨you got your sight taken by the vision of love¨ chani looks at you, she felt bad that you were so blind. But you were often like this, always have been. Soft, sensitive, caring. Its true, you and muad´dib are perfect for each other, chani could see that, but you honestly didnt wanna talk about it if she wasnt even gonna try to understand. ¨white savior¨ she finishes and looks up at the ceiling of the rock again before she looks back into the distance. ¨i love him¨ that was your finishing statement.

It was as if nothing faded, like you didnt grow, like you saw paul yesterday, like you never left. Chani felt so bad, so bad that you kept searching for paul in sleepless nights. But she also felt slightly angry, as if she didnt take you under her wing and teach you something brand new, a new way of life. It was like you totally discarded it, like you didnt want it, you didnt want to. Paul or nothing. Did you not value chanis friendship? Her love? She would never ask, shes too dominate for that. But it bothered her.

¨we should leave before it gets too late¨ chani mutters, letting out a slight groan before she stood and wiped her hands off on the pockets of her pants. You followed suit and picked up your bag before something dropped. It was pauls necklace, a family heirloom he trusted you with, he wanted you to have it. You looked at it before picking it up, rubbing over it and placing it over your neck before following chani.

The sand crunched against your shoes as you followed her, she was silent as she held the tools to get a sandworm. It was offly hot today and you both lacked water so she viewed it at that point, she already discussed with you that she wasnt gonna work for muad´dib, wasnt gonna fight for him, only gonna fight for her people. You looked at her, the sweatbeads on her forehead visible but it didnt make her look bad. You sat while you waited for the sandworm to appear.

When you arrived the foundation looked huge, guards around the premises dressed in black, all tall, muscular, and you could easily tell they were worthy of their place. ¨follow me¨ chani said, her walk bold and strong as you followed behind her in suit. Chani walked up the the guard and the guard had a strong bold look. ¨who are you?¨ the guard asked. ¨chani¨ she replied, taking off the mask that covered her eyes. ¨freman¨ he muttered, he looked over chanis shoulder and saw you. ¨and you?¨ he questioned, ¨freman¨ you replied. He stepped aside and allowed you both to enter. Chani pushed the door open, coming inside and you followed.

You werent used to this, spending all your life living in a rock. The walls were long and you looked at them, wanting to touch them, study the whole place. But there was something else you wanted to see to, the love of your life. ¨y/n, im gonna try to find stilgar. Be safe¨ chani whispered to you. ¨chani, this is home. Everyone we know is here, this is family¨ you said with a smile on your face. ¨its been six years. Foundations couldve changed, family couldve changed. Who knows what paul did, y/n¨ she said stern. You nodded your heard and she did too, leaving you off to find the one you wanted to see do desperately.

You walked, the building was so silent that you could hear your own footsteps, sand fell off your shoes as you walked, leaving a trail. A smile played on your lips as you walked throught the halls, checking every door, seeing your people. You asked them, ¨wheres paul?¨ in return they smiled, ¨not so sure. I dont even know where his room is at. Maybe check the throne room. Honestly, i havent seen him in a long time, y/n¨ and you did, no one was there. You furrowed your eyebrows and continued to look through the rooms, paul just wasnt there. Your happiness sooned turn into sadness and insecurity. Tears were on the edge of brimming your eyes. You exiteded the castle and sat down, leaning against the wall. You held your knees up to your chest and put your head on your forearms.

Where is he? Wheres chani? This is his place he cant be impossible to find, can he? Why cant i find him? Wheres his wife? All these thoughts coursed through your head as you waited, you ended up falling asleep, outside.

¨y/n?¨ you heard. Your neck had a crane as you looked up. ¨y/n!¨ it was a voice you recognized, ¨why are you outside?¨ they laughed, you finally looked up after rubbing your eyes and it was stilgar. ¨stilgar!¨ you yelled, he came down to your level and hugged you. He laughed ¨look at you, all dirty¨ he wiped your face. ¨wheres paul?¨ you questioned, his smile dropped and his eyebrows furrowed. This took you aback, ¨wheres paul? I was gonna ask you that¨ he mutters, wiping the dirt off of your cheek. You dropped his hand and looked at him with desperate eyes, ¨what-what do you mean?¨ you asked, desperate for an answer. ¨paul left 2 years ago, y/n. He said when he came back, he would come back with you¨” stilgar looks down as he reveals, you stood, paced, questioned. ¨he said he would wait for me- i….i dont understand! Stilgar¨ you let out a whine, trying to fight the tears. ¨where is he? Stilgar please, please!¨ you begged, dropping to your knees. Stilgar couldnt muster to come up with anything to say. In honesty, he mightve been more sad than you. The messiah is gone, lost. No where to be found. How could he find him? Where could he possibly be? Two years. Two. this was like heartbreak all over again. Before, you knew he was alive, but now. You know nothing. Should you go back? Is he still searching for you?

[fuga-impossivel]

celltw with their weird cannibalism thing going around made me think, if we make fpac the past version of qpac, and same for cell and qcellbit, the reason that cell was so "obcessed" with fpac more even than with fmike (they also had a little thing) could be explained by two hypotheses.

1. Cell could have fallen in love with pac, I think that's the most popular hypothesis about what was going on with them, bc it MAKES SENSE. pac and mike were probally the nicest people that cell ever meet until that time probally, he dont REMEBER hos childhood at all, first memories were blood and eating a body in order to survive. Pac and mike were innocent and weaker at the time, and were not that mean with Cell, especially pac. Cell wasnt in contact with "love" until that moment, he dont remember receiving love and giving love until that moment. When pac "betrayed" him? He was heartbroken and confused with new fellings and a possible future freedom, like that he decided to take a part of pac. Pac, a very quickly thief, always using his legs to run from crime scenes. I dont have much stuff to say, this is the most popular hypotheses about their relationship and the strange cannibalism around them :P

Now the second hypothesis is my own theory that complements the first one :)

2. I trought for some time about this and I think that the first hypothesis that I wrote here is like 99% true Canon, but i like to think that the headcanon about pac being a half-god plays a good part here, bc what if him having a "god-like meat" could affect a famous cannibal in love with him? Maybe something primal on cell minds, already a canibal mentally unstable, got "awaken", maybe pac meat was the best thing that he tasted, and maybe only by smelling pac blood ended up with him canibalizing him? I also like to think that in quesadilha island pac was always being kidnapped/attacked/threatened bc of a part of his dna/biology that him, himself dont even recognize and notices (mike too bc they grew uo together)

Just some hypothesis on ours favorites toxic yaoi :3

Also sorry for english mistakes lmao im writing this faster as I can LMAO :')

[query-quadrant]

AVICE NEEDED !!!!11!!!!!!11!!

HELP!!! HOW2 ??? ASK SOMEONE OUT PITCH ??//?? NEED GOOD ROMANTIC GESTURE SO THEY KNOW I AM SERIOUS ABOUT THEM

BEST MOST ROMANTIC WAY YO ASK SOMEONE OUT AS KISMESES: ??!??/

ok im gonna start this off with a warning dont start shit off with a bang if you cant keep up that momentum

not to be all sparkly spade emoji vitriol emoji sparkly spade emoji on you but the most over the top romantic way ive ever been asked out is when grey sent me that insane hate letter virus thing and that idiot could NOT keep it going really set himself up for failure there

if you start shit off with a grand romantic gesture you gotta be prepared to keep that energy going 

but anyway here

dubiously good ideas: 

1. once asked a dude out by pouring bleach out in his lawn ring in the shape of a spade so it killed all the grass it was really funny and was stuck like that till it grew back lmao dude got a lot of questions about it

2. one of my best friends got a bunch of calligraphy supplies and ye old ink and a quill and wrote a very fancy looking list of all the things wrong with the girl she sent it to like it looked fancy but the actual letter wasnt it was mostly swear words and shit like “thats why youre so fucking stupid youre a freak youre a freak and your clothes are ugly" and sealed it in a fancy envelope with a wax seal and everything and like a kiss mark on the envelope with her best lipstick it was really funny

3. ok this ones gonna be long and really fucking abnormal but lets be serious here if you actually need something big and grand and unique and dont wanna ask them out normal style and also im not just yapping at you and regurgitating shit i already did or a friend of mine did or that you can find in a list online already like "buy them dead flowers teehee and make them a ransom note winky face kissy emoji five exclamation points" then i mean obviously doing something personal is best i mean grey and i have the internet feud thing going on so tech based shit is it but for you your rivalry is probably based on something else doing something rooted in thats sappy and stupid and sparkly spade gif for real

what i mean is pick something you both already compete in and do it way better than they can or make it a custom challenge for them and mix your confession into it like the stupid virus i got

if you both do baking do something really difficult and annoying or time consuming that you know they cant in the shape of a middle finger 

mod a game or just boot up marioh maker and make them a stupidly hard but also well built custom troll level and hide the confession at the end 

write a custom flarp thing and when you beat their ass have your big evil character monologue be the confession 

a whole custom pitch themed escape room could be really funny if youre rich or have the right friends 

or who knows whatever it really depends on what youre into some of these are insane and embarrassing as fuck but if it works for you it works

oh man this shit got away from me lmao but basically do something specific to your rivalry that says im challenging you im better than you and i want you idk why i didnt just say that youre not dumb you dont need examples anyway

finally heres bad advice youre here for that shit probably lets go bad advice: 

1. ok i have a new idea thats going to totally revolutionize the pitch dating sphere what if instead of asking people out pitchways you try and have the worst possible confession in a different quadrant possible just really shitty awkward insulting badly timed the works 

see if you can piss them off enough with it that they just have to have you as their kismesis its called reverse psychology its very smart and sophisticated and could never go wrong

2. you can always kill their lusus killing their lusus is totally not famous for almost always backfiring and only working in insane romance novels and really shitty movies dont worry about it

3. steal a confession from a fanfic make sure its from a fandom theyre into so you can recommend them that same fanfic later

3. ask them for advice on how to ask people out pitchways and do exactly that 

wait ok actually that one could be good thats hilarious never mind put that on the good list i mean its not romantic but it could be so funny if you did it right

[dailyoyo]

thabk yoi a lot dailyoyo your brains are very compelling to me it kind of makes me want to study you like ants . i quote you all the time like i tell my friends " i stole this sentiment / headcanon from a deranged yoyo tumblr account " . you are aspirational really Truly we need more dailyoyos in the world i cant stop thinking about lawyer yoyo now .... also i beg for more dissecting of yoyo and mew dynamics if ur Into That . theuve always been really interesting to me but honestly like 4 pieces of canonexist in jsr ever so

VERY DELIGHTFUL ASK TO GET. i love to hear that i have had a net impact in making people get weirder. its so important to me. making the jsr fandom worse one post at a time <3

a lot of the way i post in here is inspired by both my friends but also some of the crazy bitches (affectionate) ive seen around over in the dragon ball z fandom in particular, but really i think ANYONE in the world no matter the fandom has the god-given right to tear characters apart with their teeth and make them fail as fuck and really really really sick in the head in ways they were probably not intended to be read as in canon. Everypony out there get eviler!!!!!!!!!!!! Now.

IM GLAD YOU LIKE LAWYER YOYO I THINK ABOUT HIM A LOT TOO. hes fascinating to me in that like hes technically not a Bad Ending (MOST of that au technically isnt!) and yet objectively he is a worse outcome because in regular(paradox) canon theres an avenue for yoyo to heal and become less bastardous. because like he has genuine friends and positive interactions and reasons to Want to be more than a self serving shithead. and also hes 16 of course hes an asshole hes 16.

but with lawyer yoyo its like. Its too late. He grew up and he stayed like that and he does not care to change and he has no impetus to change. hes definitely living a safer and more comfortable life and he has much higher self-esteem but he is Staying dead inside. Like ok regular yoyo and lawyer yoyo are both mentally at the bottom of basically the same exact well but lawyer yoyo was like "fuck it" and built a house down there. do you get me

Oh fuck this post is getting so long and i havent even talked about mew and yoyo yet.

okay so liek. beat was yoyo's first proper Friend in the ggs (as opposed to "just tolerating him being around"). because beat kind of totally fell for yoyo's whole harmless schtick lmao. but mew was the first Real Friend in that she picked up on how much of a fake fuck yoyo was and decided to hang out with him anyway.

which. ADMITTEDLY. this was originally BECAUSE she was fascinated by yoyo being so insincere (for a while he was also really playing up the "ohoho i'm TOOOTALLY not a double agent" thing for shits and giggles even though he literally wasnt.). and as previously mentioned yoyo had a crush on her which is why he didnt realize mew could see right through him. honestly for a while he kind of thought he had totally had her under his thumb but the whole time mew was like "Awww hehe he thinks im only hanging out with him because of his manipulations, thats so cute ^_^" (<- DERANGED)

and in a way while they were already friends their friendship didnt Truly start until after yoyo confessed his love and was rejected. because like the whole thing was kind of a wakeup call for yoyo - mew had noticed his feelings all along and was waiting for him to say something Just to reject him, and like among normal people that would probably be a lot more hurtful but in that circumstance it was like... she'd outplayed him. easily. and he didn't even notice, but she's still here anyway. and she still wants to hang out with him even though she can tell the kind of person he is.

because the thing is like. mew may play up her innocence and naivety but she IS genuinely kind at heart. a lot of her strange desire to examine nasty people under a microscope is because of her desire to see the humanity in everyone, to understand Why people do the things they do. and she's not under any illusions that she can """Fix Him""", god knows she's not sure she can even "fix" herself, but she saw yoyo for what he was and could respect the survival mechanisms at play for what they were. (this is also why mew was so immediately like "idk Yoyo doesn't seem like that kind of person..." when the nt-3000 thing happened because. like. she Understood his modus operandi and that simply Wasn't It.)

and like when youre the kind of person who thinks that as soon as someone sees under your mask that they'll want you dead in a ditch, knowing someone who recognizes your mask and is just like "oh cool, i got one too" is kind of world-shaking. paradoxically them recognizing each others' insincerity makes them be a lot more sincere with each other.

Oh fuck this post long as hell. yoy

[c0rinarii]

These guys have been living in my head rent free for more than 4 years at this point and i find it criminal that i did not ever post my HCs about all of them publicly.

So here yall go for the 3 people who keep up with the original Red Embrace; 5 headcanons for my 5 specialest boys. Threads into pretty heavy topics (depression mainly) and light spoilers for the game below. Play it if you havent and are intrested in them 🫵

Ash:

- Bisexual with a slight m-spec lean

- His impulsivity and recklessness is mainly caused by depression, which i think he suffers substantially from. Too many lines point towards how unhappy he was with his life before meeting his love interest :(

- HUGE anime nerd. A gut feeling tells me he would be a huge mecha nerd. But generally, he enjoys more abstract and "nonsense" anime. Unsprisingly because of this, his favourite anime is eva LMAO

- He has the most relationship experience out of the 5, having been both with women and men before meeting them. His longest relationship at that point was with a college frat boy (and the fall out was MESSY)

- Him and Troy arent best friends per say, but Troy and him went to the same college. They were accquainted with eachother when Ash got with his boyfriend at the time. When they broke up, Troy had Ash's back throughout the aftermath. I like to think the apartment he's living in currently was sponsered by Troy.

- [He gets an extra one bc he is so special to me] Deep down, Ash is someone that had been hurt so much by his life that he thinks he doesnt deserve to be loved unconditionally. Despite his tough and wry behaviour, he is a HUGE people pleaser; thinking that he needs to cater to everyone as best as he could so he has even a chance to survive.

Dominic:

- Bisexual with no paticular preference

- Prior to being bitten, Dom was an A+ student, a jock and mega popular. Literally everyone who was in the same school as him described him as "a student so perfect, he's almost alien" Despite this however, he was still described as a quiet boy with not much to say. He also got into similar shenanigains Rex did when he was back in Phoneix, but to a much lesser degree.

-The necklace on his chest is a locket! it has his family photo inside and he clutches it when he's feeling reaaally sad :(

- He and Rex are exes and he curently has some sort of weird fling with Isaac. He was the one who broke it off between him and Rex due to personal reasons (depression). The breakup wasnt a big deal initially. But when Rex found out that Dom was Seirei and pretended to be Helgen to date Rex, he felt incredibly betrayed. His feeling of hatred only grew when he realised how much disrespect and contempt he actually had for the clan system.

- He would never admit it upfront but he is a sucker for romance. He has a small stash of romance novels hidden away in a library he visits. He would have thrived on Wattpad.

Rex:

- Pansexual with an m-spec lean

- Shockingly mature when it comes to social situations. This guy is king at figuring out social ques and what is required of him to fit in (he's hopeless in any other fronts of smarts though rip). This is why he was such a vunerable target to peer pressure :(

- As such, this is why he hated Dom so much outside of clan shenanigains and because of what happened during their relationship. Seeing the absolute disrespect he had for his clan yet still being somewhat respected regardless made him incredibly envious and jelous of him. But if anything, he cant fathom how one could live completely alone like that to cope with unlife.

-He got his eye tattoo as part of a dare to see who was the "most hardcore" out of his Phoneix friend group. The dare only required them to get a sleeve tattoo, but Rex took it up a notch by getting a half body and a cheek tattoo to boot. He is really enthusastic about him and Ash getting matching cheek tattoos (which Ash rejects, but he promises that he'll consider a matching shoulder tattoo)

-He says he feeds of junkies and homeless people, but this man will actually try his best to source bloodbags instead when he can. He actually really hates seeing people scream in pain when he feeds bc he feels guilty 🥲

Isaac:

- Gay. gayyyy. fuuull fruits basket. He thinks women are great friends but he would never find any romantic interest in them. He's known this since he was a young teen and had christian boy guilt over it when he found out.

- He isnt as flirty, straightfoward or heartless as one may think from him!! A good chunk of it is a front to hide the fact that he's actually someone who gives way too much shits about people he cares about. His demeanour may not show it but his actions definitely does (Lets Ash in on what's actually going on in San Fran at night so he doesnt find out the hard way, Opting with a more "peaceful" option to overthrow Bishop that instigate a full bloodbath despite his resentment to vampires, LITERALLYYY SELLING HIMSELF OUT TO KEEP LUKA SAFE??). He flirts agressively to tease but he makes you genuinely comfy cozy right after.

- As such, he is suprisingly very easy to tease back. You out-flirt this man he is melting into a flustered puddle in the corner of the room. Ash and Dom have done it multiple times and his flustered expression never gets old.

- He does eyeliner, and has gotten so good at it that he can make a wing with a few swipes.

- Is currently in a weird fwb limbo with Dom where they're comfortable enough to vent to eachother about minor frustrations and fuck nasty, but still too aprehensive to talk about their actual feelings and struggles, as well as set aside their differences (ESPECIALLY Isaac towards Dom). Will they ever figure it out? Who knows!

Luka:

- He's currently unlabelled, but has a very strong m-spec lean. What's funny is that he actually went throgh that period where he becomes homophobic after realising his "gay" tendencies. He only got over this when he started working, and put aside questioning his sexuality completely when he set out to look for David. He's too busy to dick around with whether or not he was lame for liking boys LMFAO

- He is the only one out of the 5 to have a drivers license and a basic grasp on how to "function like a normal person of society". Also the only one of the 5 that had a legitimately established, moderately high paying job (even if it was because of nepotism)

- His previous job was as a photographer for his dad's magazine company! At the side, he also did some modelling.

- He is also extremely enthusiastic about trees and types of trees! Everytime he gets to stroll in a forest he'd lowkey geek out about any tree he finds interesting. While usually whiny about everywhere else, he will never complain about being in nature.

- He doesnt really hate Isaac as much as he lets on; and I like to think he's aware of his acts of service towards him despite having treated Isaac terribly. He holds a considerable amount of guilt for not being brave enough to say sorry and thank him for his show of kindness throughout the year and a half(?) period. He never ever forgave himself when he found out that Isaac went as far as to sell himself out to protect him.

[catgirl-catboy]

I don't understand how people think bakugou is a bad person. Like.. did you all just stop reading/watching after the first chapter/episode? Even my friend, who HATES bakugou agrees he developed over the series and isnt a bad person. Take it from someone who was bullied once- i WISH my bullies went through the same development lmao. I sure as shit never got an apology. I sure as hell wasnt obsessed with my bully and considered him one of my closest friends (if not my CLOSEST friend) at all. Thats not to say suicide baiting is okay, but this is the same mentality that causes people to dig up tweets from 10 years ago and is why people think people (fictional and in real life) are completely incapable of change ever. I think people project their own situation onto bakugou, and that's fine and all, but that's like... to say he's a "bad person" because of how he USED to be is a bit unfair... and you're right about the autism thing- a lot of us autistics SUCK! And a lot of us are capable of being mean or unkind, and also complex, not just "bad" or "good" people. Some of my friends used to be antis- really outspoken ones too- I don't approve of their actions, but do i think they're bad people for being shitty 15 year olds? No. They grew and changed and became more understanding and remorseful about their behaviour.

Sorry for the little rant btw just, yeah, sharing my thoughts!

One thing that completely throws MHA discourse off, is that what people consider a good person in the MHAverse does not equal a good person IRL. I'd say the crimes MHA does and doesn't care about are quite ???

Examples, Iida and Todoroki Rei.

For Iida, its cool motive, still attempted murder. He's not a good person just because he happens to be class pres. Mha be like "I can excuse attempted murder, but I draw the line at bullying"

If Bakugo deserves an arc for his crimes, so does Iida, I'm sorry. Honestly, they could combine Iida and Todoroki (have Touya "die" in place of ingenium) and nothing would be lost. Sorry Iida fans.

And Rei isn't the morally pure victim the fandom and canon thinks she is. Being in an abusive relationship and having mental health issues doesn't mean you aren't responsible for your actions.

Besides, what a large amount of fandom doesn't get, and this isn't MHA exclusive is that sometimes wish fulfillment is better than realism. Is it realistic for people to change for the better, I'd say so! I've never called myself an optimist. Does it make us feel slightly better about shit that happened to us, yes!

That being said, if you want to write realism commit to the bit, you know?

[away-ward]

Did you notice the conversation that the horsemen had in that Lolita class in high school perfectky describe their characterisation.

Michael thought the teacher, Lumbert loved Lolita, when in fact, Lumbert groomed Lolita. Now what have Michael been doing to Rika since she was born? Grooming her as a show of his "love"! Especially after that snippet in Corrupt's epilogue. (Michael grew up always being denied what he wants, and he felt restricted with his options, so he always made sure to go against everything he thought was "rules" to him.)

Kai thought its was abuse and it wasnt on the fault on the girl to be responsible of the situation. And how did he responded to Banks' love with Damon? Yep, he called them out because their co-dependency was borderline abusive and weird as fuck. (Kai grew up to a good home but his father was strict with him, from his choice of friends, manners, education, etc. and Katsu didnt like Gabriel and Damon. AT ALL lmao.)

Damon said "abuse felt like love" because of his relationship with Natalya and Gabriel. Gabriel grape Natalya and Natalya grape Damon. It's a cycle. So Damon's response was like how he felt being Lolita instead of looking at the situation in a birds eye view. The difference between Lolita and Damon though, Damon kept on excusing his problematic behaviour and inflict those similar pain towards innocents, especially the ones he loved most like Banks, Will and Winter.

Will said something like "why did Lolita still went back to hop on Lumbert's dick and not speak up then" and this solidifies Will's characterisation of making things about himself (because he always felt like nobody would choose him) instead of putting himself in Lolita's shoes. And look at the way he responded to Emmy's abuse, it was always "why did she never told me about anything", "you couldve told me and my parents wouldve yada yada yada", instead of just being there for her after he found out something weird about her situation. He was insensitive about the whole situation, not because he was naive or thought the world was good, but because his character was selfish and unkind first before he was anything else. At that age of 17, only a person who's so unkind and selfish would ever say something like that. Mind you, i never went through what lolita, emmy and damon went through, but i cannot ever imagine go so far as being insesitive like that to people, even at the age of 14. It was too much. Will's response, even at worst, shouldve been like Kai. There was no excuse for him here.

I think the Lolita class conversation was very interesting, but it was never really brought up much. It perfectly shows us how, even if the horsemen would help emmy then if she asked, they most likely wont halp her the way she needed to be help, patiently, kindly, and sincerely. They just werent ready for this conversation yet, if not, Damon wouldnt have kept his problem to himself and thought nobody woukd help him with everything, no? Thats why this story was never as easy as just "opening uo to people". The people that they open up to, should be on the same wavelength as them, because then, they would be like Corrupt Michael who just shouted at Rika when they found out about Miles Anderson. Even if Damon who had spent his youth wth the horsemen cant ever fully open up to his friends about his home situation, why would Emmy, a stranger to them was able to open up to the horsemen too.

And as much as Emmy knew about Banks, and even though we never git much Emory Banks in the past or presence, i was glad that this story didnt took the ridiculous route of an 18 year old girl suddenly manage to defy patriarchy and high profile men and criminals to save a girl her age in a well restricted mansion. Like think about the security, their financial situation, Banks education... the logistics of having another live in your life after saving them... crazy. I like that PD didnt do some Wonder Woman shit with their storyline, because i dont think its possible.

What do you think about these?

I did notice that! But I haven’t been able to put it into words like this. Thank you!!!

I wouldn’t say Will was selfish and unkind in his response though. Not to disregard your opinion, but the way I see it, he wasn’t intending to be insensitive. He was just privileged enough to be ignorant of what abuse can look like and how it can make a person feel. He needed to have his eyes opened to reality. But Will’s always had autonomy, so it makes sense to me that he wouldn’t necessarily understand how someone who appears to have free will would choose to stay in a bad situation. The key word being “appears.”

If he understood the reality of how abuse can make a person feel, how autonomy can be stripped away from a person even though it doesn’t appear that way, and he still called them weak and blamed them for their situation, that would be a different situation for me. I’d be more inclined to agree with you. And this isn’t to say that I think Will handled everything in the correct or right way, but people grow and mature at different rates and a big part of Will’s story is how he resisted growing up and accepting reality for so long. Understanding and sympathizing with an abuse victim takes maturity, which he really didn't have at the time.

Whether his ignorance was intentionally turning a blind eye to the obvious, or a byproduct of his privilege is up to the individual, I guess. I choose to think it was a byproduct.

I haven’t thought about why they were discussing Lolita, other than it was a quick way to bring up abuse and for Damon to get in that quotable line. But what I took from it was that none of these kids, save for Damon, were really thinking something like that could be happening to in their midst.

I still think Damon would have kept everything to himself. I don’t know if it’s pride, or shame, or him just being messed up, but I have no doubt that even if he were sure that his friends could and would help him and not judge him, he would have kept that to himself as long as he could.

The horsemen get mad when they see what they perceive to be injustice. They don’t think about why they think that way, just that they feel angry because they saw or heard something they didn’t like. And that’s part of the problem throughout the series: they reaction to things, and not always with thoughtfulness. And we can disagree with how they react – their actions – but not always why they’re upset.

Of course, they’re mad about Anderson. They think he’s scum to begin with, and now they know he’s attacking women. They don’t like men attacking women, so now they’re mad. It’s as simple as that for them. As a reader, removed from the narrative, we know it’s stupid that they yelled at Rika. But their reason for being mad is valid.

And it goes on like that. They learn of a situation, they react, and then they think. So, I don’t think Damon was worried about their reaction – even if they didn’t understand, they would have been of his side. I truly think this was a pride thing. Or Damon being Damon. He likes his secrets.

With Emmy, obviously it makes sense to us that she wouldn’t open up to them. She has no reason to rely on them for anything. She’s been so alone for years, and they certainly aren’t her friends. But from their perspective, obviously they wouldn’t have let the abuse continue if they’d known about it. Does she think they’re heathens????

easy answer: “yes, you idiots, because you haven’t shown anything different,” but they don’t know that.

Oh yeah, when Damon told Emory about Banks my first reaction was “why? What is she gonna do? You already know that Emory is barely handling her own situation, why are you trying to add to it?” And didn’t Banks have people in the house and a mom she can turn to in truly desperate situations? Like, I know she never went to high school, but she’s been doing his homework and we know she isn’t dumb. But Damon is Damon and like the rest of them, his reactions aren’t usually the most logical.  

Thank you for sharing your thoughts! I really enjoyed reading them.

[cringefail-kh-battle]

HAHA I SAID SOMEDAY BUT I MEAN NOW TAKE THE INFODUMP

Set the scene here

The world she grew up on was . Lets just say not friendly to her or her mom

Theyre witches, like biologically. Not human. Theyre very similar to humans, but not actually human. The main difference is the blood, which unlike human blood is pinkish, kinda sparkly, and has magical properties. They can also see through time but those are person specific powers and not an overall thing like the blood

Lexax can see into the past (including other peoples pasts but only if shes touching them) her mom can see into the future

Lexax has tried to see into the future but her eyes temporarily exploded so she doesnt do that lmao

Before lexax was born her mom used a love potion on her dad and that cursed not only the relationship, but any child born out of it (meaning poor little lex)

Things go fine until lexax (then iris vae) turned 6. The people in the nearboy town got some kind of proof of what her mother had done, and . Well. You know the typical execution for witches right ?

With orchid (her mother) dead, the spell she had used on lexaxs father was broken. Because of this, he panicked, abandoned his poor already very traumatized child and fled the town.

With no one left to protect her, the kid had to learn how to survive on the streets, and FAST. And she did. Though not without consequences.

She became sharp, but bitter. Fear and rage drove pretty much her every action.

With her survival skills, she had to learn to steal . The theft, paired with no protection, had her getting beat fairly often. It wasnt until she was around 12-13 that it got Bad, but she could mostly patch herself up with the potions she could brew from her blood (the magical properties i mentioned)

Eventually, someone New showed up in the town. He saw this kid passed out from her wounds in the middle of the square, saw no one helping her, and decided "well damn clearly this kid has no one" and helped her.

When she came to, the man asked for her name. Trying to distance herself from the father that abandoned her, she gave him a new name she came up with on the spot. Axel.

He stuck around for a couple years, watching out for her, teaching her how to wield a weapon, teaching her how not to survive but to Live,

He taught her about worlds other than the one she lived in, about creatures called heartless, about keyblades

If you havent guessed already, the guy is xehanort

Except a much "kinder" version (to thsi day lexax doesnt know if it was an act she shed trust him or if it was real. Shell never get the answers she wants now)

When she was 14-15 ish, she came home to find her "dad" beaten half to death and fading fast. She was fully convinced he died in her arms, but when she returned from digging the grave, the body was gone. She didn't think twice about it, only assumed it was the townspeople taking away her chance at closure, like with her mother.

This was the final nail in the coffin for her to become fully closed off, bitter and angry and frankly would rather die than make any connections ever again

Not to mention is fully willing to kill, if it would protect herself.

Like 11 years later, heartless start popping up everywhere. While trying to take one out, she almost accidentally skewers some goofy lookin kid in a red jumpsuit with an oversized housekey.

Apparently, the townspeople had told the kid, sora, that she had summoned the heartless. Complete lies, she was the one who was keeping them at bay, but prejudice will have people believe anything.

It becomes clear pretty fast what happened, and sora and his friends end up growing really fast on her. A day or two after that, she and sora found themselves completely surrounded by heartless, with no end to them in sight.

She made sora run and leave her behind, sacrificing herself to hold back the tide so he could escape. She didnt stop fighting for a second, even as she watched them tear the heart from her chest.

When she came to, the heartless were gone, but strangely, so was all the rage and fear and sorrow she had relied on to keep her going for all those years. And for some reason, she ... didnt care.

For about a year, she went on like that. The townspeople largely left her alone now, as apparently she had been seen "die and come back"

It made them more afraid of her, but whatever worked.

Eventually, two men showed up at her house. One with a ponytail, and one that both, in a weird way reminded her of her "dead" father figure and also SUPREMELY creeped her out.

They offered her a way out, a new name -- lexax --, and a job as a weapon of sorts, and she took it. Anything was better than where she was.

She passed out when she agreed, and when she woke up, her vision was. Wrong. When she looked in the mirror, her left eye had been replaced. The new eye was red and had an x shaped pupil, and when she looked at herself, she could see every last one of her weaknesses. It was unnerving. Immediately she made herself an eyepatch to cover it, and changed up her appearance, a way to signify her new life. Her made her originally dark brown hair blonde, and shaved half her head. Why not right never too late for an emo phase

OH SHIT I FORGOT SOMETHING WHEN SHE WAS LIKE 15 SOMEONE TRIED TO KILL HER . They tried to burn her at the stake like her mom

She managed to kill her would be executioner and get away, but not without extreme burns on her legs and severe pyrophobia

ANOTHER THING I FORGOT at like age 16-17 for a few months she was able to go to the realm of darkness in her dreams. She ended up finding/making friends with/having a bisexual awakening over a girl there. One with blue hair and a keyblade.

But it wasnt long before she lost the ability to go there.

Anyway, her first day she gets paired up with some rehead guy. Something about "proving himself" after losing... someone. she was really not paying attention to anything that was being said unless it was being said to her directly

The guy doesnt seem too jazzed about it, but hey, neither is she.

They get their mission done, but last second get swarmed by a random hoard of heartless. It seems like theyll be fine, but then she realizes. This guy is fighting with *fire*. Lexax freaks out and bolts, so the guy has to go hunt her down

They have a little bit of a bonding moment, but shes not here to make friends so as soon as they get back she locks herself in her room

Over time, as much as she was trying not to, she ends up making friends with the redhead guy, along with the ponytail guy that originally came to get her, but ESPECIALLY demyx who is the only one who gets to be named here. Best friend privilege lol

Well. The main events of kh2 happen. Finding out about the demise about 2/3 of her friends but especially demyx, lexax goes a little. Apeshit. Initially she wasnt going to fight sora because he was her friend too, but after finding out he was the one that killed demyx, and being lied to abt him "being the one that killed axel" (she was purposely very much kept out of all the loops and lied to at every turn because that worked SO well with roxas and xion) (speaking of. She was made xv but no one knew why . If she tried to ask x*mnas he would just give her this look that really creeped her out until she left)

Anyway she vowed for revenge and hunted down sora when he went for his whole seige on tctnw

Problem was her whole rage thing made her sloppy. She ended up with a whole ass keyblade through her gut and was forced to hear soras side of the story as she laid on the ground half dead

Realizing how badly her head had been fucked with, she forgave him and wished him luck going forward, then forced him to leave her, since she wanted to die alone

Before she could die though she realized she had One healing potion left. It brought her back from the brink of death, but not by much.

By the time lexax had caught up with sora and co, the only one left was x*mnas. So, she does what any reasonable person does and shows up to the fight, claiming that bc it was just the two of them now that there wasnt an organization left for her to betray and she was just there to watch the fireworks. After all, she never fuckin liked him anyway.

In a show of power, he attacks her by surprise and force chokes her to death. She didnt get any words out but she Did flip him off on her way out

She comes to back in her old home, and while she cant use dark corridors anymore, she Does have a form of teleportation she can use, provided she has the right ingredients for the potion + has been where shes trying to go

So she goes somewhere she always thought was peaceful and calm, which, frankly, is something she fuckin needs at this point -- twilight town.

She also decides to keep her name and new appearance. If she came back, her friends might too, and it would be better if they could actually recognize her when they did.

Just a heads up beyond this point is when the romancy stuff starts to kick in bc she deserves love so much forever poor woman has experienced The Horrors for 27 years let her Rest (oh . Yeah . I should mention i hc kh2 to take about a year in itself. 6 ish months at the very least there was so much happening in it its the longest kh game by far) oh yeah also now that shes no longer a nobody the red eye is gone so shes just kinda normal now

Anyway shes minding her own business in her little house in tt and she hears a voice that she hadnt expected to hear again and quite literally falls out of her 2nd story window in shock. Dw she lands in the bushes shes fine shes survived way worse

But when she wrestles herself Out of the bushes, there he is, one of her friends that is Supposed to be dead

She had told herself that if she came back, they probably did too, but it wasn't much of a hope. More of a bandaid on the bullet wound that was the despair she was feeling over it

Anyway she sees axel (or lea now but how would she know that) and shes just. Standing there. Because thats all she can think to do . Shes in shock but she manages to say his name and he turns around and she just fucking. LAUNCHES herself at him in the biggest fuckin hug shes ever given

Yknow at least until her legs turn to jelly and she starts Bawling because no one has ever come back before

They catch up and then eventually the start of kh3 happens

Sora shows up and warns her the org is back but doesnt mention xehanort

No one knows her connection to him except xigbar who is keeping his mouth shut about all this because its funnier to just watch it all happen

Well guess who shows up in her house to try and sway her over to his side

Lexax feels Every Emotion At Once on finding out her long lost father figure wasnt actually dead. She goes to hug him but last second, surprising both herself and xehanort, FUCKING DECKS HIM GET HIS ASS LEXAX

All the joy she felt at realizing he was alive turned to rage in an instant when she realized that he abandoned her after he PROMISED he would get her out of that world, knowing full well the amount of danger she was constantly in

This turned to even more rage when she found out that technically he was xemnas and he fucking killed her

She went apeshit and kicked him out of her house, as she should

So then immediately he sent in xigbar, because they were friends so hes probably got a better chance at swaying her

Well shes overjoyed to see him too

But then something clicks about a reaction hed had to her in the past and she realizes. He knew abt xehanort the whole damn time so now shes pissed at him too

Not quite so much, he doesnt get decked, but shes mad nonetheless

This is when she officially joins up with sora.

But because of that, theres a last ditch effort from Daddy Issues to try and bring her over

And of course, its the most logical move anyone can use

Fucking. Remotely EXPLODE lexaxs left eye and have the red one grow back in its place ! It doesnt have its old powers anymore, but instead has a new function -- he can watch her every move, and she knows it.

Fucking scary right

Anyway she tells sora about this and he sends her to radiant garden because if anyone can help its the biggest emo nerd with the most lab unsafe haircut ever ienzo

Well. He cant help.

So lexax, being the badass she is, decides to take it upon herself and fix the problem.

By gouging out her own eye.

After this, she decides that xehanort needs to be dealt with, and he needs to be dealt with NOW. Fuck all his plans for whatever

So she sends a message not only to sora (by the way i forgot to mention her nickname for him, she calls him starboy :] ) but to lea as well that shes taking him on herself and if she doesnt contact them in like 10 minutes to assume shes dead

The element of surprise worked in her favor, but not enough to kill him like shed planned. Instead, she cut off one of his arms. Before she could get a second swing in, he got her in a move similar to how xemnas had killed her

But, learning from her mistakes, she had a teleportation potion locked in her teeth in case of this exact scenario, and was able to bite down on it and get herself out of there before she died, with only some heavy bruising around her windpipe

Lexax girlboss moments

Fast forward to the scene with everyone in the mysterious tower bc like hell she isnt getting involved in that (somewhere in there theres a reunion with demyx and now shes One Happy Lexax. Also he lives in her house now (meaning he just kinda showed up and she never told him to leave))

She and aqua have a whole pointing spiderman meme moment like "HOLY SHIT YOURE REAL???" and also she comes clean to everyone abt her ties with xehanort and everyone gets a little freaked out abt that, and rightfully so but its still a little insulting its pretty clear no one wants him dead more than her

During the whole fuckin battle sequence where Everyone Dies she focuses almost solely on keeping lea safe . She lost him once, no way in hell shes gonna do it again thats her Fuckign Boyfriend

When the maze shit initially happened, the L&L duo got separated, and lexax ended up fighting xigbar

During this fight, she manages to make a sort of whip out of tangible darkness. Xigbars like "dont you think youre getting too op lol" and lexax hits him with the "i had to take out my own eye i think i earned this" and it comes out. He had no fucking idea what she had been put through. And considering they are still friends, hes a little bit Shook about it

Like he hides it well but theres a certain air of horror to his reaction that you can tell hes a little fucked up over it

And, deciding he doesnt wanna fight her anymkre, just fuckin. Teleports her over to The Boyf.

She meant to stay by leas side during this and protect him, but as soon as she saw x*nmas she got Revenge Tunnelvision and went all out attackjng him and only him.

Her sword shatters in the fight, leaving her with just a jagged stump of metal to attack with . Fucked up

When x*mnas goes to attack lea, lexax goes a Little Bit Apeshit and tries to attack him with said jagged stump of metal, only for (in the most anime way possible) it to turn into a whole ass keyblade

But then she immediately catches saixs claymore in the guts and gets flung into the wall and left to bleed out in the dirt

Maybe dont wear a crop top to war next time, lexax

Fast forward to right before everyone care bear stares xehanort with their keyblades. Turns out, he had replaced his lost arm with one made of darkness, not unlike the whip lexax had made

Like father like daughter yknow

Well just to taunt him, lexax cusses him out and shows off her new keyblade, because the main reason he had left her was her inability to manifest one

Anyway fast forward Again to his Defeat Defeat

While the wayfinder trio is having their moment with force ghost eraqus lexax ends up clinging to xehanort and sobbing, saying that she "hates him so much"

All he can do is hug her back and say "i know"

Then following his Peaceful Fuckoff With His Ghost Ex, she has a full on breakdown. Screaming, crying, punching the ground. He hurt everyone so much, he hurt HER so much, why should he get to have such a peaceful happy ending???

She tells everyone she needs to be alone for a bit and fucks off back to her original world for a few hours, and comes back to her house in like the middle of the night

Cue the epilogue cutscene era

Lexax is genuinely so much happier now. Found family is the best drug out there /j

She doesnt live alone, instead in her house its her, lea, demyx, isa And xion

She tricked out the basement into the coolest room a 15 year old girl could ask for for her (with the help of the boys in the house + roxas) (demyx didnt help. but he did buy the pizza)

Shes happy and gets to have soft domestic moments and is jsut!! Not being traumatized for the first time like ever!!! Look at her go!!

[gaypleasantview]

A, F, I, L , P, V and Y (lmao so many but i'm curious)

TYSMMMMM

A: Favorite CC creator

Honestly its so hard to say bc i love so many 😭 naturally im a fan of creators that create or used to create something essential and super cool like platasp, jacky93sims, moni lisa sims, skittlessims, leto mills, linacheries, pooklet and azaya, mrs mquve, riekus13, rockethorse, applewatersugar, pforest, kestrelteens, vidcunds, sammy sundog, and probably a whole bunch of other creators that i forgot... if i had to pick someone i have a special love for it would be leaf-storm because im such a huge fan of their cc 😭 and naturally i got to mention you and dirk as my beloveds that im always so excited to see new stuff from 🙏🙏

F: Gameplay with or without cheats

Well im a legacy challenge kid, thats where i came from and thats i will forever be, and those require you to abstain from cheats so i got used to making money myself and its super fun, as a kid i would always abuse rosebud and motherlode and honestly when it comes to the first one its probably justified bc playing ts1 with cheap furniture is hell 😃 but with the other games its not the same! i gotta say i started building more recently so the basic building cheats are as necessary as ever but also i think i love testingcheats so much im just gonna have this mod tattooed on me literally bc its so scary and gives you too much power but the fun of it cant be described. i used to abuse it as a kid as well

I: Your Bella Goth theories

Honestly im a bit tired of all the bella business but i accept any theories, i havent decided on one myself but i lean towards thinking bella is in strangetown but is strangetown bella The bella? idk. i also dont like that bella from psp said she married for money and i dont believe her bc her and mortimer are the only true love in the universe it feels sometimes

L: Have your sims ever cheated?

As a kid i made Chester Gieke successful and he was my favorite sim, i also grew up with a lot of christian guilt but it looks like i played chester before that happened bc once i opened his save after a few years i was completely shocked betrayed and upset when i saw that he fucked four women two of which were his robots? i love that i had fun with it as a 8 or 9 yo bc later in life i cared for sims too much to make them cheat 😭 i do wanna play as a romance sim sometime bc i never truly experienced that but i still feel bad when my sims are sad so we'll see

P: Pose or play your sims?

I may not be super good at it but i loovvee posing sims with animations, everything else mostly just looks too basic to me bc once youve seen a pose a few times youre gonna recognize it everywhere and its not as fun anymore. but i still like them regardless! i just think im mostly better off using parts posers, animations or just literal gameplay so that people wont be annoyed with my pictures (honestly tho who cares. its my game) but in general gameplay is my favorite, even though ive always been a big fan of screenshotting, esp in ts3

V: How did you start playing the sims?

When i was about 5 yo we moved into a new place and we got a computer and my sister heard from her classmates about the sims, of course we had to go to our insanely-popular-at-the-time book market that had many many ill*gal game cds lol it was really hard to get a real copy back home bc ts2 wasnt localized in my language and ts1 wasnt even published in any nearby countries at all i think so people had to localize it themselves. we found a stand that had every ts1 expansion on display and we couldnt pick between makin magic and superstar i think. but superstar had xtina on the cover so of course we picked it, turned out it was superstar and literally everything that came before it (that is everything ts1 had except making magic). so that was my first sims game and i kind of dedicated my life to my love for it ever since. i dont remember how we started playing ts2 but i remember my first time playing it

Y: Favorite career

Paranormal probably 😭 bc i loved resurrecting sims. and idk maybe culinary and science? i love ghost hunters in ts3 🙏

[dzchris]

hello, it's jamie, again, still, this time here to introduce absolute piece of trash chris kwon. i still am also the mun of @dzyuanjun and @dzyena i will not let you all forget i fear. yet again no plot page here (yet, i say hopefully, delusionally even) buuuut do feel free to read his profile and biography respectively. or don't. i'm not here to tell you what to do. i'll leave a rundown of them (derogatory) below the cut so feel free to check that out too. feel free to like this post or send me an im or if you prefer discord, just say so and i'll add you there

triggers: parental neglect, bullying 

chris kwon... my beloathed... can't stand their bitchass

non-binary, goes by he/they pronouns in general, just he/him works tho, in work settings and stuff

a cali boy (gender neutral), grew up in the states hence their perpetual 'relatable western-korean idol' stint that baekho media shoves down everyone's throats

grew up in a rocky family situation, mother's side is korean diaspora that settled in the us and their dad was a korean nepotism baby studying in the states for pretentious rich people reasons. no shocker that chris' dad was out the door the second he realized he had knocked his not all that serious fling up

chris' mom is... not that much better. kind of a hot mess of a person. def not capable of raising a child, leave alone one she kinda rlly didn't want

chris isn't privy to the fine details but at some point during very early childhood they almost got put in the system on grounds of child negligence but his aunt (his mother's sister) stepped in at the last moment and took over custody, chris and their mother both have been living with his aunt and her family ever since (which tbh is as long as chris can remember)

so obviously his bond with his mom is also Not Great, his aunt always tried her best as far as she could but tbh with his uncle and his older cousins also kinda despising chris' bitchass, family stuff has always been tricky

school wasn't much better, chris got picked on a lot as a kid and he always retaliated with outbursts or violence or something that vein which in turn always got him in even more trouble

yeah, chris has always been an angry defensive kid,,, still is a i fear

went to an alpha entertaiment audition with friends and somehow??? got in??? they were also kinda surprised by that but hey they were more than willing to take the excuse to get out their family situation and just yeet to korea instead, so they did

training under alpha ent was... not a good time... not for chris or any of the other trainees tbh. chris didn't really have much experience backing him up and quickly found himself with a raging inferiority complex which in turn only... made them Angrier and More Competitive

ngl they spent most of the 5? 6? years under alpha just arguing and fighting with just about anyone he could

ofc, clover debuted and chris wasnt in the debut line-up lmao

what did he expect 1) he couldn't stand any of these bitches and 2) i think they would have combusted on the spot if they had to sing baby

chris stuck another handful of years in alpha after that, continuing their shitty attitude vibe, not rlly sure what else to do with himself

until eventual baekho media hit them up like hey bestieeee wanna join our label if you do we'll promise you a spot on our upcoming survival show as one of our own label's representatives

and what was chris gonna do? say no?

they were kinda rlly popular on top five? they had like 5/6 years worth of trainee experience and baekho milked tf out of that 'former alpha trainee that was supposed to be in clover' narrative

was it true? no but it did earn chris the number one spot in the very first episode, not falling out of the top three for the first half-ish or so of the show

chris seemed kinda set for debut but ofc, like all good things in their life, they had to ruin it for themself

as he acted all around selfish, difficult, confrontational and sometimes straight up Mean to the other competitors, aided by very dramatic evil editing, chris found himself slipping down the rankings until he was actually not in the top 5 for the first time since the beginning of the show by the last episode before the finale

they ended up scraping in at fifth place, barely, and tbh chris has a tiny personal conspiracy theory that maybe baekho media rigged them into that fifth place spot. no real evidence for that. just cuz chris doubts he could've brought anything to a good end by himself

so yeah, top five is over now, 5ummit set to debut and chris is,,, impossibly struggling with overcoming the urge to fistfight their new members on a daily basis, to not see them as competition but as coworkers anymore

needless to say chris is bad at making friends, he's generally guarded and mean and callous, which as a not-even-debuted-yet idol is something that makes it very easy to come across as rude or disrespectful

chris can be charming and flirty in that fuckboy-y (gender neutral) sense when they want to be, the cool badboy (gender neutral) archetype

but most of the time he's just, a poorly held together pile of anger issues and feelings of inferiorty

so yeah,,,, have fun trying to befriend chris,,, they're a piece of work

they're??? kinda trying to no longer be evil, just want to experience love and affection now but it's an uphill battle, that's for sure

[tuiyla]

thank you for answering :) i wasnt sure if you were tired of this discussion hahaha

i think that it's a little strange how they wanted to make tatum the s1 leighton and tried to villainise her but then accidentally wrote her to be a little too nice to leighton earlier. had she been just a little bitchier or that they showed another scene of her not being too nice, it wouldve come across better and we wouldnt have this wtf? moment. im not sure if you're familiar with the show, but another tweet pointed out how accidentally likeable tatum is and compared the reactions to her (assumed) departure to how the reactions were to penelope from legacies (the tvd spinoff). and that kind of hit the nail on the head for me. i think it doesnt help that gracie dzienny pulls off that "mean top bitch you would root for" so well. maybe they shouldve watched her in first kill 😂

i just wonder how theyre gonna write leighton and alicia now since they sort of used up quite a bit of plot they couldve used for s3. and considering midori is on greys now, i wouldnt be surprised if they had to rip them apart just to accommodate any potential scheduling conflicts. it just feels like they shot themselves in the foot here a little. had they not write off tatum so quickly, they couldve given themselves space just in case that happens as well.

it all just feel like wasted opportunities. youre right in saying its easier for us to sit back, judge it and think we couldve done better after they already finished the job. especially considering how volatile the fate of hbo's projects are right now. but it just feels so wasted because the show already had a good chunk of people loving it and it also naturally grew this season. it couldve just been so much better, but of course we dont know what went on behind the scenes.

not that i dont deeply love the show, i really do and i get really excited every week. but if this happens again next season, then it'll just a little painful to watch subsequently because all i'll think of is how it couldve been better. and thats saying a lot considering its already quite a great show.

I’m really just missing the nuance from how Tatum was written. I mean, there is a way to have her be as supportive as she was and for her to still, ultimately, be someone who reminds Leighton too much of a version of herself she wants to change. But to pull that out of their asses and toss Tatum aside despite all the good qualities she’d been given, nah that ain’t it.

But in that sense I’m not sure Tatum was accidentally likeable. I think they cast Gracie for a reason, surely, a reason beyond that she kinda resembles Reneé Rapp. I do think the creators put enough thought into it to consider that Tatum would inevitably be likeable to many and I don’t think the intention ever was to completely villainize her. Nor would that be a good story. It’s just... there’s such a disconnect between her first three episodes and how easily she’s discarded. Once again I can only say that it was lazy writing and that’s what I find upsetting.

I’m just curious to see how Leighton’s journey continues, and I do hope they put more weight behind her social awakening in season 3. There is the question of how she can continue being with Alicia when Midori might not be available for as much as a love interest of a main character should be, but really I just care about Leighton. If they write Alicia out in episode one I am gonna be upset ngl lmao because then what was the reason? Ah well, we’ll see. I take comfort in the show’s apparently good numbers and that it was renewed for season 3 so quickly. But one can never know in today’s fragile streaming market and especially with HBO Max and their bullshit so I hope the show doesn’t alienate its audience in season 3. I fear the season 2 finale might have done some damage; valid or not is another matter, but yeah it’s tricky with audiences nowadays. But also, like you say, it is a great show and I enjoyed season 2 very much despite my criticisms, and I just wish for the pacing and other adjacent issues to improve in season 3. I feel like by the third season a series should be mature enough to have that stuff figured out.

[razette]

Ive been struggling a lot lately with the idea of building a life.

I might have been loved growing up, but I wasnt raised. Ive had to figure out shit in my 20s that supposedly people are expected to figure out in their teens. I wasnt taught how to do things or manage basically a million mundane emergencies, so much as I was just expected to just... handle them. given shocked pikachu faces when I couldnt because I didnt know how?

It turns out this is a pretty common experience, but that doesnt make it easier to... recover from? to fix? case and point, i guess, I dont really know.

Theres some kind of... banal comfort to not being raised. People kind of have expectations for you that are based on their general expectations about life. but also life has exactly zero direction. Which kind of makes it feel like life goes no where and nothing ever really happens except when it does, which is annoying and inconvenient.

Honestly, I kind of just expected it to end at some point.

sometimes i *wanted* it to end the same way people in the middle of a moderate car crash would like to not be currently experiencing a moderate car crash. The horrors show themselves for exactly 5 seconds, and if you are "lucky" the aftermath sticks with you for years. everyone says its a blessing or a miracle but they didnt see the horrors with their own eyes! Except ??? they probably have and are pretending they didnt. why do we pretend? well, because it was horrible of course! what else should we do about it?

Other times it was a lot more like generally waiting for a meeting to end. A long, redundant, boring corporate meeting where no one REALLY makes any practicle sense but if you SAY that theyll look at you like you grew a 2nd or 3rd head. Like you arent dedicated to company vision. like you dont really fit within the company "culture" and should look for new employment. but EVERY company is exactly the same! an isolated bubble of unreality that maaaybe pays the bills, but probably not. So you dont say the meeting should have been an email. it goes on forever and youre supposed to come out it profoundly changed and pulsing with a heightened ferver that kinda sounds more like a fever dream, or something. honestly youre just hungry and tired.

This all says SO MUCH about me as a person rather than about the world as a whole, I know. I KNOW. Im grappling with it on tunglr.com.edu.org!

And YET life just continues on. suddenly im 30 something. things feel pretty alright! huh. lmao haha that was all so weeeeird! Turns out if you dont die you keep living! absolutely wild. Kinda fun even! sometimes. holy shit what was literally any of that?

And now what? I dunno. I thought writing it all out would clarify something, but it didnt?

I guess I will go do dishes.

[fizzbot]

I L O V E U (For the ask game :3333)

AWWW thats cute :33333 but of caurse!!!!! <333 love u too!!!!!!!!!!!!!

fandom ask game og post here!

I - Has Tumblr caused you to stop liking any fandoms, if so, which and why? uhh. a couple, probably?? but i cant think of any off the top of my head :PP most of the ones that i can think of ALSO come from things like. me growing up. like, south park?? i grew out of that one HARD, but also seeing all the incredibly weird/bad takes on tumblr really sped up the process LOL. other ones i have never been into but their fandom just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. like, welcome home?? yikes

L - Say something genuinely nice about a character who isn’t one of your faves. (Characters you’re neutral about are fair game, as are characters you merely dislike. Characters that you absolutely loathe with the fire of ten thousand suns are exempt, as there is no point in giving yourself an aneurysm over a character that you hate.) uhhhhhh......okay.........ill say charlie. as much as i dont really like her character, i will say. she makes up for it by how well her energy bounces off others. even though im basically never interested in her by itself, its almost HARD to come up with a dynamic with her that ISNT interesting in some way!!! one of my favorite little pasttimes is looking up rarepair edits/art, and even if none of them are ROMANTICALLY compelling to me, its really fun to imagine what charlie would be like with basically anyone!!!!!

O - Choose a song at random. Which ship or character does it remind you of? LOVE this question!!!!! LMAO one of them immediately jumped to mind, but i decided that wasnt "random" enough so i hit shuffle on my music playlist and. it landed on that song, anyway. so this isnt hellaverse related, but my (current) favorite song of all time is 'sin eater' by penelope scott!!! i associate it with basically the entire smith family from rick and morty, esp rick prime :PPP thats not hellaverse related though sooooooo skdfhsjkfd 'twist the knife' by that handsome devil is THE MOST vox/radiosilence coded song ever. like come on

V - Which character do you relate to most? like. ever? out of all characters ever made? not that is matters because the answer is (unfortunately) blitz.

E - Have you added anything cracky/hilarious to your fandom? If so, what? LOL we basically dont do anything else <33333333333 the stupid bit of lore we came up with of "the deadly sins went on a roadtrip and mammon let (baby) charlie wander into the woods of wrath where she got lost for 3 hours" gets me literally every single time. also just. madam. they are insane

U - Three favorite characters from three different fandoms, and why they’re your favorites. OH FUCK YES. umm. im gonna combine all of the hellaverse here to say "striker" as my number 1 over all. hes my favorite because he is the only one in his show that has ANY SENSE. plus his character design is good, his voice acting is great (i miss you norman reedus) i cant imagine not liking him the most. thats my snake boy. extra points for being so hot. umm.......rick and morty came to mind next, again, bc thats what we were into last. birddaughter is my fave character in that one :) she has.....what, 20 seconds of screentime?? and yet she is perfect. shes emo, shes got the CUTEST voice, i am so goddamn obesessed with herr!!!!!! i need to see her more NOWWWWWW SEASON 8 OF RNM PLEASSSEEE. annddd the last character, a classic, im sure you know who im gonna say, is papierwaite from sam and max!!!!! before the hellaverse i wouldve said he was the guy i related to the most, he takes easy second place. i love him to death, he FASCINATES me. skunkape release the remaster for devils playhouse PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU

[v-r-i-s-vris-v-r-i-s]

I LOVE BAD ART

hiii im thyme (ze/zir/they/them), one of the 4 ppl w accces to this acct, and sry for spelling, im dysgraphic + actualy typing and not using speach-to-text like normal

ANYWAYS

i LOVE bad art, and i HATE when ppl get upset i say that!

i grew up w a lot of pressuer on me to be good, definetly in general, but also absolutly w art!! my mom was an artist, and i grew up VERY christian. everything i did reflected on god, and more importantly to my mom, on her.

she was so exited to have a kid who LOVED art and stuff like her, but i was never good enough. she would always tell everyone how good i was, how i was gifted by god, and how much i took after her. (she was v self centered and would majorly talk up anything that made her look good, yikes i know)

so ppl would be naturaly interested and exited to see! and then i would be forced to show them some art, which, keep in mind, was verry age appropriate and full of the generally goofy stuff i loved, and 9/10 they would be dissapointed. even if they werent my mom decided to constantly pressure me to do better.

this was really stressful obv, and i stopped drawing for the first time. when i got into middle school, i started again, this time not really ttelling my mom. i was happier, but had already had it impressed down onto me that my art had to be good to warrant existing or taking my time. i was v stressed by it, and as i slowly started to get more comfortable i was imedietly bombarded with competition.

i struggled to get better in the ways that seemed easy for anyone else, PDA kicked in as soon as i felt something NEEDED to be done, and i was compaird to everyone my age and younger and told how much better theye were.

i never wanted to make it a competition, i just wanted to have fun. i wanted to do something hands on that could express me better than my words ever could (undiagnosed autism at the time made me feel verry weird and thuroughly broken, and explaining that wo imedietly getting invalidating and patronizing answers simply did not happen)

i stoped drawing again. i changed schools and had a better art teacher. she wasnt a dick bout my art, but definetly acted overly suportev(possibly im anxiose and projecting past art trauma onto her lmao and she was just being normal, she was cool af tho). i starded drawing more, on and offf, and got REALLY depressed and burnt out. one of the ways it manifested was being unable to be creative.

but things did get better!!! got an autism diagnosis and educated myself more on my dysgraphia diagnosis(got in elementry school), came out, made freinds who brought me to queer music and caberet shows(tysm phoenix), and was able to move out!

as im now on my own, my art drive has rissen signifigantly, especily as im surounded by other art enjoying weirdos(complementary). but i still hate when someone says that my art is good or bad. constructive advice and support is always valued, but there are so many mediums and people and styles, how on earth do we judge that?? having to be good enough for everyone to warent my own existance and hobbies almost killed me, and sucked all of the joy out of my life.

ive seen people who got so happy to doodle, only to stop forever when someone makes a remark on skill with their age. ive seen family stop bc someone joked abt their stick figures or car drawings, because even if the joker didnt mean it outside of a goofy remark, the joke was meanspirited and ment to put the artist down. I HATE THIS??!?!

WHO DECIDES WHATS GOOD ENOUGH TO EXIST??? capitilism? christianity? the example of two dead ppl from history???

obviosly i dont fuck w that.

art is something made to express something, how are you going to take such a broad catagory and shove it into your biased and sad binary?

so i proudly call my art bad. as an ongoing rebelion against everyone who thought and thinks that something has to fit their binary of goodto exist. i say bd to help myself unlearn the shitty things that were pushed onto me, and as a way of saying i dont have to be anyone's good to warent my own joy.

some ppl will cut in here, theyll tell me not to talk badly about myself (im not). theyl say even if i dont mean it bad, my brain will internalize it as a negative(i dont think that applies here?) or theyll spew some capitlistic bs (HUH, GUESS HOW I FEEL ABOUT THAT.)

no hate to others reclaiming their art and love for it in different ways,this is just how it works for me. in in my art vocabulary, bad means not locking itself into the harsh expectations of good, and i find that incredibly freeing :)