#i will never forget the time one of the. submitted a completely different assignment even though the proper template was right there 😭

[thesingingrevolution]

i helped a football player pass theology last semester maybe i can eventually cash in a favor and get him and his buddies to recreate this with me

[johnbrand]

Breeder Boy

Adam hoisted the suspenders up slowly, his mind numb as he went through the motions of tightening each strap around his shoulder blades.

“Yeah, that's a good boy,” his best friend Isaac affirmed from behind. “That's my good, obedient breeder boy.”

Adam blinked. He could not remember why Isaac had taken to him after college. The two were practically opposites back then. Isaac was a popular lacrosse player with girls constantly at his side. Adam had been a data analytics nerd who had only managed to kiss one boy in his entire life. And it had been an accident. Their social circles would have never intercepted if it had not been for the Intro to Psychology course they had both taken as an elective.

They had been paired as partners in a simple project exploring different subsects of therapy. Adam and Isaac had been assigned with hypnotherapy, although going in it had been obvious which one of them was actually going to do the work. That was until Adam explained to Isaac what their subject was. The nerd had been shocked to see the jock’s sudden enthusiasm for the subject. Inspired by Isaac's curiosity, Adam had tried his best to answer every question Isaac posed to him.

"You are about to have one of the best days of your life.” Adam stood still as Isaac’s arms dropped around his head, a black bowtie ready to encircle his throat. “You will smile, laugh, maybe even cry at the sheer beauty of your woman. The ceremony and reception will be branded into your memory forever.”

Adam gulped, his face still emotionless as he tried to process everything. It was like his life had changed after meeting Isaac. After that project, they would be together almost all the time. Whenever Isaac was not at practice, partying, or getting laid, then he would be with Adam. At first, Adam did not understand the sudden friendship that emerged between them, but Isaac had told him to disregard it. In fact, there were a lot of things Isaac had told Adam to forget about.

While it had been too late to completely change his major, Isaac had reasoned with Adam that an accounting degree would be much more beneficial than his current computer sciences. That way, by focusing on business, he would have more time to do what he and Isaac loved, sports. Adam had protested at first, but after Isaac’s well-crafted arguments, his opposition was cleanly dismissed. 

After graduation, Isaac was able to spend even more time with Adam. The two often discussed so many different topics that Adam could not quite remember everything they had covered. It was strange how Isaac, someone he had known for only a tiny portion of his life, had known more about Adam than even Adam did. Isaac had clarified early on that he had understood Adam’s wants, goals, and needs. Isaac had joked that Adam should just forget about his former aspirations, as he knew them better anyway.

“Yup, don't resist it…atta boy,” Isaac praised as he secured the bowtie. Adam fidgeted with his ring, the cold metal foreign to his formerly naked finger. 

“That feels good, doesn’t it?” Isaac took notice. “You like knowing you're about to be married to a woman. You like that I helped you become an alpha male. You like to submit to the patriarchy and uphold the traditional masculine supremacy.”

Adam said nothing. It had been just over five years since they had first met. Five years since Isaac had begun reshaping his life, and where was he now? At 27, Adam was a successful businessman at a firm downtown, often working with clients beside Isaac. Adam now enjoyed lacrosse, tennis, and frequent pickleball. Adam spent mornings at the gym and evenings at the bar. And right now, he was about to marry his girlfriend of almost two years, the woman he had fallen in love with and was preparing to dedicate his life to.

“Just think, back in college you were nothing more than a faggy partner for what I thought would be a blow-over of a psych class.” Isaac, his best man, brimmed with excitement. “Now you’re worthy of being a man, a real man, who’s gonna slide that straightened cock into a fertile, tight pussy tonight."

“And at the heart of it all," Isaac sneered. "you were the one who began this whole thing. My good breeder boy.”

Adam blinked. Butterflies bounced around in his stomach as he tossed the suit jacket over himself. He was excited and nervous as he approached the doors, one of the the best days of his life beginning he entered into the church hall.

"Looking good, man!" Isaac cheered before whispering. “And don’t forget, that baby you're making tonight should be named Isaac.”

Adam chuckled. Isaac had been his best bro, had known more about Adam than he himself had after all. That honor only felt right.

[soobieedoo]

Formula of Love CH. 14 - we have “chemistry” together (written + smau)

word count: 1,154 (sorry yall i got carried away..)

the clinic was busy today, a saturday night closing shift meant every university student coming to the campus clinic to get medicine for preventing hangovers, condoms, or from time to time people asking if they can get what beomgyu likes to call "fun pills".

usually haechan would be out right now, if he was still at his old school you could always catch him at some kind of party on saturday nights.

but, he’s not even thinking about going to any party. yes he’s stuck at work, but he’s stuck at work with a pretty girl who happens to smell like flowers. why would he trade that for a house that would smell like weed and sweat?

haechan has never been so confident to be at work. after his last shift, he’s convinced that y/n has finally warmed up to him. his thoughts confirmed when she ACTUALLY waved hello to him first. he couldn’t help but smile.

despite hours of being together you haven’t had a chance to talk, he also hasn’t had a chance to ask about the chemistry assignment…which was totally his only intention. In between restocking and dealing with customers. it’s been hard for haechan to get a word in with you. but thankfully, the rush finally went down, everyone going to their respective parties.

side by side packing orders he debates for a few minutes in his head, until he finally asks “hey y/n, i didn’t get to ask how r u today?” last time he asked this question all he got was a quick one word reply. you obviously had wanted to end the conversation quickly, to his surprise this time was different.

you look over at him slightly shocked he’s talking to you after what happened last time, but hey! you promised you wouldn’t ice him out so you reply sincerely “ehh could be better, that rush was crazy.” haechan almost couldn’t believe it, you actually answered…and more than one word.

“it doesn’t help that yesterday i spoke to professor kim, which btw was absolutely useless and a COMPLETE waste of time” he watches as you angrily straighten out any wrinkles that may have formed on your coat “i mean HONESTLY you’re a professor, isn’t it your JOB to help your students?” you scoff.

haechan finds it cute, seems like when you’re angry you rant to anyone without a care in the world.

you seem to realize that you’ve spoken a lot more words than usual to him and quickly apologize “sorry…i got carried away”

“nah you’re fine, feel free to rant about him all you want. why’d you even talk to him?”

“the recent assignment has my brain melting, i talked to him about a question after i finally submitted it and he gave me THE MOST vague answer. i had to retract my submission cause it made me doubt my work so much.” you sigh.

“ahh yeah, that assignment is impossible i swear. i tried to talk to jeno about it but he didn’t give me shit, said to ask other classmates but no one knows either” haechan hears you laugh.

“that’s crazy, i would have thought that having the chemistry TA as your friend has its advantages. i guess not.” haechan smiles

“yeah, he’s useless too.”

haechan can’t believe it, he’s actually having a conversation with you.

haechan hears you sigh, multiple times actually. he looks over to see you hunched over at the counter, working on the assignment you both just talked about. the clinic was dead, the shelves were restocked, and the orders for tomorrow had already been packed. haechan offers to sweep the clinic and you kindly asked him if it would be okay to work on the assignment where he of course, agrees.

he goes over to you and looks at your paper, instantly recognizing the question. its the same one he’s been stuck on for days. “yeah that question has me stumped too”. you jump, having so focused on the assignment you forget for a while that you’re still at work…with haechan.

“its impossible i swear, he’s doing it on purpose so we lose a mark. its like he wants to see his students fail.” you slump down in your seat.

“i’ll be right back.” you watch as haechan goes towards the door and flips over the “OPEN” sign to “CLOSED” shuts the blinds and runs back into the locker room. he comes out with a backpack and a folder in his hand.

he sits next to you and opens up his folder to the same assignment.

“see i have this formula here but it makes zero sense, i have no idea what the next step is and the answer doesn’t match anything at all.” he hands over his paper and you quickly look over it.

you look back at your assignment and realize you have two different formulas “wait let me try something” you take the first part of his formula and second half of your formula, he watches as you scribble down the numbers quickly mumbling to yourself. suddenly, you get up from your seat. “THATS IT!”

haechan is shocked, he’s never heard you this loud before. he watches as you clap almost in tears “HYUCK this is IT i figured it out look!” you sit back down and explain it to him, he can’t focus though, you called him “hyuck” the last time he heard that was the very last time you guys talked on call.

“donghyuck?”

“huh?”

“do you get it?”

“sorry. i blanked out, can you say it again.” he feels embarrassed, one nickname shouldn’t affect him this much. he focuses now, ignoring the memory.

“y/n youre a genius.”

“we both are! without your formula i wouldn’t have figure out what was wrong with mine. so thank you.” you smile at him.

haechan feels like the world has stopped.

“i guess we just have chemistry together” he jokes

your eyes widen, his subtle joke affecting you way more than it should.

“im kidding, cmon dont act so scared! im serious though we could work together on assignments like these, i don’t really know much friends from my chemistry class so it’d be nice to have someone to talk to”

“y-yeah that’d be nice” you scratch your neck, slightly flustered. how is he acting so normal?

“is your number still the same?” he gathers up the strength to ask.

“oh no…i changed it after i lost my phone. here i’ll put it in your contacts! feel free to message me about any chemistry related questions!”

“sounds good thanks y/n, and you too feel free” he once again smiles at you. its quiet for a second, just you two staring at each other, “um we should probably lock up the store, don’t want an angry text about responsibilities from doyoung!”

“right right…really dont want that” haechan shudders as you laugh, both of you quietly cleaning the store together.

note: are we finally making some progress 👀👀

taglist: @bloomyroses @lionzyon @ourbeautifulaffair @yewshi @injunnie-lemon @nessaassen02 @dudekiss3r @jianreadsaus @haechsworld @catpjimin @onlyhyunjin @stqrgr7

masterlist | previous | next 𐙚˙✧˖

[jebewonmorelike]

Young and Rich, Tall and Just Ask Me Out Already

wc: 2.1k pronouns: n/a; none used warnings: none really? maybe the tiniest bit of angst... fluff... and i used the word d*ck once, my bad also you can pretend they're in college or high school, doesn't really matter summary: prepschool!ricky/richboy!ricky just can't get scholarshipkid!reader to go out with him no matter how many helicopters he lands in the school courtyard ~masterlist~ ♡ ~kofi (no pressure at all)~ guys... whoah... rich-boy-with-a-soft-side ricky just kind of hits different? i must say i outdid myself with this one so please, please, please enjoy :)

Ricky has been trying to convince you to go on a date with him for two weeks now.

The first time he asked you was after Chemistry one afternoon. You had been assigned as lab partners at the beginning of the semester and shared a desk during class every Monday, Wednesday and Friday from 1:10 to 2:40 P.M.

At first, you'd found it kind of difficult to relate to Ricky. His dad was a CEO at some big tech company and he didn't really let anyone forget it. Always flaunting his designer watch with the newest phone model in hand, entire classes full of students couldn't help but fall for him as he draped his Louis Vuitton jacket casually over one shoulder.

But you were just "the scholarship kid". A humble upbringing and a borderline genius IQ, attending this prep academy was an opportunity you and your family could never have turned down.

Working on labs with Ricky wasn't difficult-- mainly because he let you do all the work while he listened to music and played on his phone. But if you were being honest, you didn't really mind. You enjoyed working on the labs at your own (fast) pace and you didn't have to worry about a lab partner messing up your data.

You never disliked Ricky. But you also could never really figure out what to say to him when he talked so expensive and acted so expensive...

And looked so expensive.

But after a few weeks of silent lab work together (and a handful of flunked quizzes returned to Ricky's desk), the tall blonde suddenly turned to you with his latest graded test in hand.

"What did you get?" He asked, eyes peering over to try to get a glimpse at your paper.

"Oh, um..." You placed it flat on the table.

His eyes widened in surprise. "105? Again!?"

"What do you mean 'again'? How do you know that?" You questioned, looking back at him suspiciously.

He completely ignored your question. "There wasn't even a bonus question on this one! Where did the extra points come from?"

"The mini-essay I submitted last night on chemical kinetics."

He stared at you for a moment. "You're kind of weird, you know that?"

You nodded. "I guess you would think that."

"What's that supposed to mean?" He questioned, dark eyebrows furrowing.

"Do you want me to help you or not? I would think calling me weird wouldn't really help persuade me," you quipped, snatching his test from his hand and reading the grade circled in red pen: 63.

"Hey! Don't--," he protested, trying to steal the paper back to no avail as you slid it into your bag and zipped it closed. "I didn't even ask you for help yet."

"You were obviously going to. You've barely said one word to me in four weeks, so. I'm pretty sure you weren't just making friendly conversation."

Ricky blinked back at you silently for a moment. "It's not like you've said anything to me either."

"I'll look over your test to see what you need to improve on. Do you have the rest of the quizzes from this month with you?" You asked quickly, standing up from your seat and slinging your bag over your shoulder as the bell rang.

"Uh, no I don't," he admitted, not making any move to get up now that class had ended.

"Okay, well--."

"But I'll bring them tonight. To the library," he interrupted.

You stood there silently, not really sure what to say.

"Be there at 9," he said definitively, a grin suddenly spreading across his face as he stood up, grabbed his bag, and started walking towards the door.

"You--... Do you think I don't have a life or something? I... What if I had plans!?"

"You did not have plans," he said with a laugh. Just before he walked out the door, he turned over his shoulder to add, "But now you do. With me."

~

It was like that, how you started tutoring Ricky late nights at the library. You met after 9 P.M. the days that you had class together, going over the material you'd covered that afternoon. He was a surprisingly passable student and you started to wonder if failing his classes was somehow intentional. He started offering to help you with lab work as the weeks went on, messing up detrimentally only a handful of times but you did appreciate his effort if nothing else.

Your tutoring was definitely helping; Ricky's quizzes came back now with passing grades that had even once reached the height of a 91. But what you didn't want Ricky to know was that he was helping you, too.

He had been right that day: you hadn't had any plans that night. And you rarely did. It was hard to fit in with the other students at your school when they had all led such different lives than you. You could have never guessed in a million years that Ricky would eventually become something like your friend.

Ricky made you laugh. He sharpened your pencils for you. He brought you snacks you liked. He'd let you borrow his Nintendo Switch for the day, as long as you promised to give it back to him in class. You hated to admit it, but a few weeks into your tutoring sessions and there was much less studying going on than was originally intended.

And another thing you hated (not really) to admit: you liked Ricky.

Sure, he could be a little overconfident. A little braggadocios. A little too reliant on his daddy's money.

But late at night in the library, you both grew tired together and the sleep deprivation gave way to a much more vulnerable Ricky. He'd tell you about his family, his childhood, his favorite things, his troubles, his dreams... and he'd listen carefully to you when you shared yours, too.

One time, after sharing a surprisingly upsetting childhood memory involving his father, you could see Ricky's eyes start to water. He tried to brush it off, adjusting his watch as the walls of the persona began to build back up in defense. But before you could stop yourself, your hand had reached across the table and landed on top of his.

He stared at it for awhile before looking up to meet your eyes. "Thanks," he said quietly, swallowing with uncertainty.

You removed your hand and placed it back in your lap. "Sorry," you replied awkwardly.

"No, no, you're cute," he said quickly, a hand flying to cover his mouth when he saw the expression on your face and realized what he had said. "I--I--... I meant 'cool'. Like... Like I meant to say 'you're cool', as in, like, 'don't worry about it'."

His babbling just made you smile. "Freudian slip?"

"Exactly," he agreed hastily. "Wait, no!"

"Too late, no take backs," you blurt, flipping your textbook to the next page to continue with your notes. Your heart absolutely raced inside your chest when you heard Ricky lightly breathe out a laugh before following your lead and resuming his note-taking.

~

Ricky certainly had a public image he wanted to portray, but whenever he gave you a glimpse underneath the facade... that was when you couldn't help but fall.

So when he asked you out for the first time, sun shining as you walked together from Chemistry to the student lounge on a Friday afternoon, your stomach absolutely flipped with excitement.

"I'm gonna take you to dinner," Ricky said, hand combing through his blonde, coiffed hair.

"Like--... Like on a date?" You clarified, looking up at him to try to read his expression. But much to your dismay, he was looking straight ahead, not at you.

"Yeah," he responded flippantly, hands finding his pockets. "There's this new place that opened downtown that's, like, mega exclusive. Figured you can't say no to that."

"No."

"Exactly... Wait, what?" Ricky stopped in his tracks, eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

"No thanks," you repeated. Looking at him now, you could tell exactly who was standing in front of you. No matter how much you liked Ricky, you didn't want to go on a date with this persona of his.

You wanted to go on a date with Ricky.

"Oh..." He replied, shock written all over his face. He swallowed hard and you swore you could see his cheeks start to redden with embarrassment.

"I really like you, Ricky," you clarified with a smile as you watched his eyebrows shoot up at the confession. "But no thank you."

You didn't wait around to field any possible questions. Turning on your heels, you headed off in the direction of your dorm leaving Ricky absolutely dumbfounded in the campus courtyard.

The next time he asked you out, it was in the hallway before class the following Monday. He handed you a small, light blue gift box, his eyes looking everywhere except at you.

You suppressed a smile, opening the box to find a dainty, rose gold bangle with the signature Tiffany T-shaped cuff ends. After having a mini heart attack over how much the bracelet in your hands must've cost, you took a deep breath to maintain your composure.

"I can't accept this," you managed, though you had to admit you were a bit sad to refuse it (and to refuse him a second time).

Ricky stared back at you, absolutely astonished. "Why... Why not?"

"I really like you, Ricky," you confessed again. "But I'll have to say no thank you."

As your professor called for everyone to take their seats, you hurried inside the classroom and left Ricky to trail in behind you completely stunned once more.

~

Ricky has asked you out about eight more times since that day. Each time, the simple question is skirted around and instead replaced with more and more elaborate and expensive gestures.

Now, it's 9:30 on a Friday night and you're typing away on your laptop, working on a paper that isn't due until the end of the semester when Ricky bursts through the doors of the library and darts straight towards your usual table.

"Are you seeing someone else?" He blurts out, catching his breath as he stands in front of you waiting for an answer. His hair falls boyishly across his forehead and he's dressed in a a hoodie and black joggers. You get the impression he had rushed here suddenly without any preparation and he looks so stupid cute.

"No," you reply, chewing on your cheeks to keep from smiling.

"Are you interested in men?"

"Unfortunately."

"You keep saying you like me and then you refuse to go out with me. Do you like me?" He asks, a little too loud for a library, but you're both lucky there's no one else that would be studying on a Friday night.

"I do," you confirm, watching as his eyes grow a bit more pleading as he wrestles with his own confusion.

"Then... Please... Will you please go out with me? I like spending time with you so much. I like talking to you so much. I really, really like you, (Y/N). Will you please just give me a chance?"

"Of course," you answer immediately.

"Yeah, I get it, I get--." Ricky's eyes suddenly light up as he realizes what you said. "REALLY?"

You nod, biting your lip in a satisfied smile and throwing your laptop into your backpack. "Let's go right now!"

He blinks quickly, following you as you stand up and walk towards the door. "Right now? But you--."

"Ricky, I don't really have any time to waste. I've been waiting for you to ask me out for two weeks now! Can you blame me for being a bit eager?"

"What... what do you mean? I've asked you out, like, a dozen times," he says as you step outside into the cool evening air, grabbing your wrist to stop you in your tracks.

You smile up at him. "No, you haven't."

"Yes, I--," he starts to protest, but you cut him off.

"You've told me you're taking me to an exclusive restaurant. You've bought me designer jewelry. You've given me an autographed poster from WayV. You've hired the Vienna Philharmonic to play at the student lounge. You've landed a helicopter in the middle of the courtyard..."

You watch as realization begins to wash over his face. His mouth hangs open a bit as he processes his numerous missteps. Then, a hand finds its way to the back of his neck as he smiles at you sheepishly. "Oh."

"So I've been waiting very patiently, you see."

"I'm sorry to keep you waiting," he says with a smile, and then more solemnly he adds, "And I'm really sorry for being a total dick."

"Well, you're in luck. The only way to make it up to me is to get late night pancakes with me. And it just so happens, that I am incredibly hungry right now," you say, taking his hand and starting to pull him in the direction of the parking lot.

Ricky laces your fingers together as he falls in step with you. "Oh! I know the best place for pancakes, it's--."

You clear your throat and he stops his thought in its tracks.

"The diner?" He asks, looking to you for approval.

You nod, giggling back at him. "The diner."

[nc-vb]

𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐞𝐬, 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞

Happy Birthday, Kaveh! ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و ♡ I'm only two hours late in my timezone, sue me!!! just something quick & small for the loml.

pairing -> kaveh x gn!reader

warnings -> none, minor stressors/triggers.

notes -> extremely self-ship coded. totally never had any of this happen to myself; certainly not.

wc -> 2k

Procrastination. Exhaustion. Forgetfulness. Then, last minute responsibilities.

You didn’t mean to leave things to the last minute. Usually, it isn’t so bad that you would leave such a thing to the day before. Thesis writing, yes— guilty as charged; your closest friends and family have watched you scramble and panic to complete and submit your assignments before their due date, have watched you fly out of the library or out the doors of your house with a thick package in hand containing some kind of assignment. Even putting off doctor’s appointments out of sheer laziness for having to get yourself there became a habit— when was the last time you’d gone for a check-up, anyhow?

But this is different, this time. This, you think, is unforgivable. If it had been anything to do with your own birthday where you’d forgotten something, you wouldn’t have paid much mind nor care much about it. But it’s not. It’s Kaveh’s.

This simple, nearly-overlooked fact is why if anyone decides to walk through your front door, they’d find only chaos within your modest home. Your first attempt at baking a vanilla-flavoured cake from scratch had ended in utter failure, having turned the temperature of your oven one hundred degrees higher than you’d meant to, while the second became due to having slipped on a drop of cake batter and sending the newly-filled cake pan flying through your kitchen and into the brand new diamond-shaped crystal vials you’d purchased to put various types of home-brewed essential oils into. Suffice to say, the strength of your throw meant there were no survivors. Oh… The flowers left out to dry outside had been forgotten about in the meanwhile, and it’d taken only a short sun shower for your plans to make potpourri with them to become completely scrapped.

Broom in hand, you mindlessly sweep up shards of glass from the broken vials into a pile in the middle of the floor.

Anything that could have possibly gone wrong, went wrong. After all the time that it took to find all of the ingredients, all of the flowers for the potpourri and the oils, and all in the nick of time to bring over to Lambad’s for Kaveh’s surprise party— what can you even tell him? Knowing Kaveh, he’d still try to placate you and calm you down when you finally tried to explain the situation to him, that the only reason your efforts ran out had been because you forgot it was his birthday.

Your movements are quick to end the longer you find yourself stewing on things. Because everything really should have been foolproof once you had a plan in place: Cyno and Tighnari would swing by to collect the cake and your gifts and bring them along to the tavern, and when Kaveh was due to arrive a half an hour later under the ruse of you taking him out for a simple dinner, he’d arrive there, pleasantly surprised by the faces of his friends and by the cake you’d painstakingly made. It would be an entertaining night of food and drink and friends, and by the end of it, Kaveh and yourself would return to your own home rather than Alhaitham’s, an arrangement neither of them minded to have arranged.

At least the cake will have made it, you say, glancing to the dome-covered thing resting on your counter. Covered in berries of various types and split through the middle and filled with a vanilla custard, it awaits the arrival of your General Mahamatra and Forest Watcher friends. And when they finally do, surprised is barely the correct word to describe their expressions.

“… under… normal circumstances, I would’ve thought up a joke to try and cheer you up,” Cyno admits quietly, his one visible amber eye flitting about the entirety of your kitchen. “I don’t think this is one of them.”

Tighnari sighs almost exasperatedly at him. “Well, I’m glad to hear you at least know how to tell the difference.”

“Sorry for the mess,” you say from your place at your dining table, a hand still raised in greeting from when they first walked in. “It’s all yours, the cake.” You gesture to the damned thing sitting a few feet away from you. “Thanks for coming to get it.”

“Sure, ______,” Tighnari says. You watch him carefully tiptoe around the piles of glass and batter splotches in order to reach, and just as cautiously lift it from the counter to secure it in his arms.

“Are you sure you don’t want any help cleaning up?” Cyno asks.

“If these were normal circumstances, I might’ve said “yes” to your first offer,” you start to explain, “but since they aren’t, and given the fact that I’m probably going to start crying the second you both turn around to leave, no. I’m sure I don’t want help.”

The two exchange a look with the other, their mouths curved down into frowns.

“After I’m done throwing myself my own party of a most piteous kind, we’ll meet you for Kaveh’s.”

“All right, then,” Tighnari says. “Deep breaths, okay? You're alright.”

“Y-Yeah.” And just as you’d predicted, the second they leave, salty liquid is quick to gather along your waterline and completely spill over and down your cheeks. “Damn it.”

Just once, could something go right? If not for you, then for the things you do for others? You’d swear you’d been either cursed in another life or just saddled with an unfair amount of negative karma in this one, and would give anything for just a smooth ride of a day.

“Deep breaths,” you repeat to yourself, voice thick from your tears, using the broom to sweep up the piles into a dust pan. “Deep breaths, deep breathing, c’mon…”

You manage to tidy up with kitchen with less than a minute to spare; in wiping down the last of the mess off the counter, your front door clicks open, swinging creakily on one of the three hinges and revealing the man of the hour.

“Ah, ______! I’m back.” Per his typically routine, Kaveh rests Mehrak on the miniature settee sitting by the door, hangs your house key on the hook above it, and slides off his flats before moving quickly over to you. Before you can even lift your arms all the way, your movements still delayed, Kaveh wraps his around yours, pulling you tight into his warm chest and placing a lengthy kiss against the crown of your head. “I missed you.”

“Welcome home,” you say, voice muffled by his scarf. “Missed you, too.”

For a moment, he hums, before forcing you away from him to examine you.

“What’s wrong?” he insists. Slowly, you shake your head.

“It isn’t anything special… Just that the things I wanted to get done today didn’t… exactly get done.”

“Oh.” By the look on his face, you can tell he’s trying to stifle his relief. “Were they important things?”

“… yes. I’ll try again tomorrow, but I’m just… still a little overwhelmed by it to go into detail right now.” You sigh heavily, only to collapse back against him. “I really missed you so much.”

Softly, Kaveh chuckles, and gently squeezes you to him. “Thank you. Whenever you’re ready to talk about it, I’m here. Okay?” You nod.

“… it’ll definitely have to wait until later, though. Don’t want to ruin the party’s mood before we get ther—” you instantly seize on the spot, sleep-heavy eyes quick to widen at your blunder.

Sensing you having gone stiff within his hold, Kaveh pulls back and smiles bashfully at you.

“D-Don’t panic!” he says. “I’ve known about it for a little while now. Ah, w-well… sometimes, you talk in your sleep.”

“Ah. Oh.” Damn it. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, either.” He plants another kiss against your forehead. “Surprise party or a regular one— I’m happy, regardless. Besides! I’m a good enough actor.”

You scoff playfully at him. “I’m glad I’m here to be able to tell you that you’re really not— everyone’ll know, instantly.”

He huffs. “You don’t believe me, huh?”

“Alhaitham will know instantly,” you decidedly correct. Kaveh purses his lips.

“… okay, fine. Alhaitham will know.” His next breath is harsh. “He’s really coming, too, huh?”

“Now that’s how you should act when you walk in,” you muse. “You’re really that surprised by this?”

“Well… it’s just… it’s Alhaitham.”

“And?”

“A-And—””The two of you were once good friends,” you say, interrupting his lame attempt at reasoning with you. “Just because he’s always short with you or sarcastic, it’s not for a lack of caring. You two being polar opposites isn’t a bad thing. Hm…” An unnameable expression rises onto your face. “If not for me in the picture, I’d have bet you two would eventually start dat—”

“Argh, this again?” You giggle into the hand he’d lifted to cover your mouth. “Anyway… I suppose we should be going soon, or he’ll have another reason to get sarcastic.” Placing a kiss upon his palm and successfully flustering him, you grin.

“Can’t have the birthday boy late for his own birthday, right?”

“Right.” Hand in yours, he leads the way back to the front door, only to pause and look to the kitchen wall. Your eyes widen at the batter splatter you’d missed. “Uh…”

“L-Later, okay?”

As foretold, Kaveh’s acting is below average, but as you both agreed, only Alhaitham is the only one to notice. Arms folded over his chest and legs crossed in his seat, he sends a raised eyebrow and a flat expression in your direction.

To your relief, everyone who had responded to your invitations sent out a month ago had been able to make it.

Cyno and Tighnari and Collei had easily been definite “yes’s”, their answers sent back the very next day.

Alhaitham, you didn’t have to question, despite his response of “if my schedule isn’t full, I’ll make an appearance”.

Dehya and Candace had been a long shot. With Dehya and her commissions, she’d been a little difficult to track down, but eventually, you’d managed to pin her at a desert Eremite outpost during a reprieve. Candace, you knew might’ve been the only flat-out “no” due to her duties at Aaru Village, and had even said she may not be able to send a proper response in time.

Nilou decidedly tracked you down to give you an in-person response, and even tell you she’d work on a dance just for Kaveh.

The Traveler and Paimon, who were only bondable thanks to their connection with the Adventurer’s Guild, managed to find you on the streets of Sumeru at the tail-end of their own commission to tell you they’d be sure to make it.

But certainly, the most surprising appearance goes to the Vahumana representative— Hat Guy. Quite obviously, his name had been a moniker, but even still, you can’t help but to laugh every time you have to say it. Okay, maybe he noticed Kaveh’s poor acting, too. He looks young, but still as though nothing could escape such watchful eyes.

After the day you’d had, yes; it really is such a relief. Even the cake made it in one piece! you happily realize, spotting it over Collei’s shoulder.

You drag your eyes away from the scene and focus them specifically onto Kaveh. He’s glowing. You’d argue that he always does, even on his darkest days. Golden and ruby red— he’s truly dazzling, so much so that you find yourself squinting.

“______?” he calls, and perhaps not too non-suddenly. “Are you alright?”

“I get to spend the birthday of the man I love with them,” you answer proudly, returning the few gentle squeezes he gives your hand with a tug of your own. The skin at the corner of his eyes crinkle when he grins. “I'm great. Happy Birthday, Kaveh.”

@c-a-v-a-l-r-y @leis-stuff @auraee @rvisn @plinkuro @vcvoxu @minty-vxnilla @ChaoticHearts-19 @stygianoir @imeanwatever @N-akaharachuuya @katelynwithpaint @sadflightlessbirds @sunnyf4lls @mydickisbigger @endlessmari @chocogi @hunterluv @kwelibeeery @okadahimiko @junephantom @kom4ya @barbatosfavouritenun @amilium @whorerificstuff @swivy123

© nc-vb/niicevibe 2022-2023 please don’t repost! reblogs & comments are always appreciated.

[lythea-creation]

Broken Toys - Johanna Mason x fem reader (Chapter 22)

Chapter 1

Previous Chapter

word count: 2.449

------------------

None of us was able to sleep properly tonight. At least I was not freezing thanks to Finnick.

I was drifting in and out of sleep when I heard Peeta's voice: “The issue is that I don't know what is real anymore.”

“Then, you should ask, Peeta. That's what Annie does”, Finnick suggested.

Right. Due to Annie's mental state Finnick was great at dealing with broken people. Maybe that was why I was feeling so comfortable around him and somehow safe. I knew that I could trust him to support me when I needed him.

“Who should I ask? Who can I trust?”, Peeta questioned.

“Well, us for example”, Jackson assumed. “We're your unit.”

“You're my guards”, Peeta shot back.

“That too. But you saved many lives in 13. We don't forget such things”, she proclaimed.

Silence erupted until Peeta addressed Katniss again: “Your favorite color … is it green?”

“Yeah.” She nodded. “And yours is orange.”

“Orange?”, he wondered.

“Not a bright orange. A muted orange. Like the sunset. At least that's what you told me”, Katniss recalled.

When Katniss, Gale, Finnick and I returned from our propo the next day, Jackson had invented a game for Peeta: 'true or not true?'. He told us about a memory and we agreed or corrected him.

We were divided into different groups for guarding him.

Gale and Katniss were each put together with one of the other soldiers while Finnick and me were assigned together to one. Of course that had a reason.

Gale was an expert when it came to Peeta's questions about district 12.

Finnick and I could tell him about both his games as we had been mentors during Peeta's first games and his allies during his second. Though Finnick was a greater help than me because I had mostly concentrated on Rue during the 74th Hunger Games. And Finnick had been together with Peeta almost the whole time during the Quarter Quell.

The rest of the questions was up to Katniss, which was not an easy task for her. I could only imagine how Katniss was feeling by imagining Johanna in that state. I was extremely grateful that at least Johanna's memories were alright.

On the next day we were sent to a blocked off street district for more spectacular video clips. We were all wearing special protective clothing just in case.

Gale was the chosen one to hit the actual pod while the rest of us was shooting around aimlessly once again.

Pretty frustrating being a great sniper and never hitting a target at the same time.

The explosion led us to throw ourselves onto the ground.

Afterwards Cressida made us replay the situation over and over again to get a better shoot. Though it was difficult to stay serious as Mitchell was an even worse actor than Katniss.

“4-5-1, get a hold of yourselves!”, Boggs scolded us, although he was barely hiding his grin.

He was still looking at us when he stepped onto an orange brick and triggered a mine.

Once again an illusion turned into reality. Our laughter turned into screams as Boggs' blood tainted the ground and the fake smoke was replaced by real.

Another explosion erupted leaving me completely disoriented.

I took a deep breath and carefully made my way through the smoke. I could not rely on my ears as the loud noise of the explosion had influenced my hearing.

Finnick came into my sight first. He was desperately trying to revive Messalla, who had been flung against a wall by the explosion.

I nearly slipped when I approached Katniss, Homes and Boggs. The ground was covered in blood and parts of Boggs' legs.

Nausea overcame me, but that was not new to me.

Boggs had lost both legs and literally clung onto the holo. He had to be in a lot of pain. Considering the blood loss he would not survive.

“Incapable of command. Submit the top security check to unit 4-5-1, soldier Katniss Everdeen. … Say your name”, I heard Boggs' weak voice through the ringing in my ears.

“Katniss Everdeen. What did you do?”, Katniss wondered.

“Get ready to retreat!”, Jackson yelled.

Finnick shouted something back and pointed to the sector we had come from.

A black, oily substance streamed out of the street and the gaps of the buildings were creating a black wall. Knowing Snow it was definitely deadly.

I watched Homes and Katniss pulling Boggs with them. The substance was approaching us quickly.

“It's fruitless! We have to leave him behind. He's going to die in a few minutes anyway. That'll just spare him more suffering!”, I realized and made Katniss and Homes let go.

“I'm sorry, commander”, I whispered.

He simply smiled at me, showing me that I had evaluated the situation correctly.

Suddenly I heard a lout sound. Peeta had tried to hit Katniss with his gun, but had hit the ground instead.

Mitchell managed to hold Peeta to the ground, but the latter was stronger and kicked Mitchell a few steps back, making him stumble into a trap.

Mitchell was lifted into the air trapped between barbed wire. The blood was streaming out of his body.

“Don't move”, Katniss yelled at him, although we both knew that he would not survive.

In the background I heard explosions.

Gale and Leeg one had been shooting at the ground the whole time to create us a safe way to the next building.

Peeta moved to attack Katniss again, but I pushed her out of the way, dodged Peeta's punch and kneed him in the groin.

Castor and Pollux dragged him away while I pushed Katniss toward the building.

Gale and I were entering the building last and now I was feeling seriously sick.

A few seconds later Gale and I were throwing up, because of the fumes we had inhaled.

In the background I heard Peeta resisting and kicking against something. Later I noticed that they had trapped him inside a wardrobe.

Leeg two, Mitchell, Boggs. We had lost so many already and the real games had just started a few minutes ago.

The surveillance cameras had definitely filmed us after all the pods we had activated and we could not contact our allies.

Jackson was the new commander now and of course wanted Katniss to hand over the holo, which the latter refused to do. Katniss lied that Boggs had given her the holo because she had gotten the special order of Coin to assassinate Snow.

Now the unit split up as we pointed our guns at each other.

It seemed like either Jackson or Katniss was about to die, when Cressida interjected. The one who was not on anyone's side: “It's true. That's why we're here. Plutarch wants us to film everything because he believes that the war will be over when everyone sees how the mockingjay kills Snow.”

Jackson hesitated. Then she pointed at the wardrobe Peeta was in. “Why is he here then?”

“Both interviews with Caesar Flickerman have been filmed inside Snow's private quarters. Plutarch thinks that Peeta could lead us there because he's the only one familiar with the area”, Cressida resonated.

Impressive. She was lying convincingly without a second of hesitation.

That settled it. Although Jackson was still suspicious and grumpy, she helped Katniss handling the holo.

We decided to get out the same way we had entered the building as the substance had probably activated the other pods and made the cameras useless.

So we put on our gas masks and followed Katniss.

The substance had turned more or less hard. We did not sink into it and did not leave any footprints. At least one positive thing on such a terrible day.

Homes was carrying the unconscious Peeta while Cressida and Leeg one supported the light-headed Messalla.

On the way further into the city I realized that Katniss had been right about the activated pods. I spotted dead tracker jackers and destroyed buildings.

The further we got away from the source of the substance the thinner it covered the ground.

We hid inside one of the Capitol's buildings to reorganize and evaluate the situation.

More explosions erupted from where we had come followed by the TV turning on startling us.

“Don't panic! It's just a special broadcast. All TV's in the Capitol turn on automatically”, Cressida soothed us.

The screen showed the video of us since the mine Boggs had accidentally activated.

But the cameras had not seen us escaping out of the building again, that was now nothing more but a burning ruin. They happily declared our death.

“Finally we have some luck”, Homes stated.

True. Though something else was bothering me.

I imagined this broadcast being shown in district 13 where our families and friends were waiting for us to return.

I thought about Johanna who had probably just gotten over her relapse and had to deal with the fact that she was in 13 instead of the battle field, far away from me.

I thought about the pregnant Annie, who had seemingly lost her husband and father of her unborn child.

I thought about Prim, Katniss' mom and my family who had after two Hunger Games finally lost their children.

But that was another difference to the previous Hunger Games. No trackers.

“And what are we planning to do next, now that we're dead”, Gale cut through the silence.

“That's obvious, isn't it?”

I had not even noticed that Peeta was conscious again. “Next … we are killing me.”

“Don't be silly”, Jackson shot back.

“But I just killed one of us!”

“You pushed him away. You couldn't know that he would stumble into a trap”, Finnick tried to soothe him.

“So what? He's dead, isn't he? I didn't expect that. I've never felt like that before. Katniss is right. I'm the monster. I'm the mutt. Snow turned me into a weapon”, Peeta cried.

“It's not your fault, Peeta”, Finnick reminded him.

“You can't take me with you. It's only a matter of time until I kill the next. Maybe you think it'd be more human to leave me behind, but then you could just hand me over to the Capitol right away. Do you think you'd do me a favor by sending me back to Snow?”

Gale promised to kill Peeta before that could happen, but Peeta wanted a nightlock pill. A poisonous pill everyone of us had gotten for the case that one of us got captured. Coin did not want more Peeta's and Johanna's. Honestly I did not want to share their experiences either.

In the end Katniss somehow persuaded Peeta to trust us and we started looking out for food.

Luckily Messalla knew where the citizens of the Capitol were hiding their food. They even had cookies! Each of us got one of the thirty food cans.

When we had switched to dessert and were handing around some cookies, the TV turned on again and our portraits were shown on the screens, like the pictures of the fallen tributes in the arena.

Then President Snow himself appeared on the screen and talked about the victory over the mockingjay. He presented her as one girl out of many, randomly chosen and made to the face of the rebellion.

But Snow's speech did not last too long as district 13 still had Beetee. Mixed feelings spread inside of me when I saw Coin. “Dead or alive, Katniss Everdeen will remain the face of the rebellion. If you should ever waver in your resolve, think back to the mockingjay because there you'll find the strength you need to free Panem from the oppression.”

“Didn't know that I mean so much to her”, Katniss joked earning laughter from Gale and me and confused stares from the others.

Were they not aware that Katniss' death was actually her wish?

A picture of Katniss in front of sparkling flames was shown before Beetee let Snow take over again.

“Tomorrow morning, when we will gather Katniss Everdeen's dead body from the ruins, you'll see who she is. A dead girl who could not save anyone, not even herself.”

Coat of arm. Hymn. TV off.

“Though they won't find her”, Finnick said what we were probably all thinking.

Katniss turned on the holo and I watched all the blinking lights.

“How are we supposed to get through that labyrinth of pods? They're growing in numbers and the pods earlier haven't even been detected by the holo”, I pointed out.

“Let's exclude anything that won't work first”, Finnick suggested. “The streets aren't an option.”

“Neither are the roofs”, Leeg one assumed.

“Maybe we can retreat by using the way we came from. But then our special order would have failed”, Homes noted.

Katniss confessed the truth. That there had never been a special order from Coin.

“That doesn't matter now”, Jackson stated.

Most likely she had not believed Katniss anyway.

“We can't stay here. We can neither go above nor to any side. So there's only one option left.”

“Underground”, Gale concluded.

After a huge discussion Peeta 'agreed' to accompany us because we refused to kill him.

When we arrived underground we were welcomed by the suffocating smell of chemicals, moldiness and sewage. Pollux was completely pale and shaking.

“My brother worked here for five years before we've been able to buy him out. He hasn't seen the sun once”, Castor explained.

Out of all people Peeta was the one who found the right words: “Then you've just turned into our most important ally.”

Both brothers smiled.

There he was, the old Peeta. The kind, gentle boy, who always found the right thing to say. The selfless boy who tried to help wherever he could.

His words turned out to be correct as we were moving fast.

After six hours the exhaustion overpowered us. It was three am. And therefore it would take the Capitol some more time to figure out that we were still alive.

I took the first watch because I was not exhausted enough to have a chance against the nightmares. Sometimes I was lucky enough that the exhaustion shut them down.

Indeed I managed to sleep several hours in a row later on, only to be woken up by Finnick.

I was busy waking up when Katniss told us to stay silent.

Actually I thought that everyone obeyed, but there was still a sound moving through the tunnels. A whisper calling out Katniss' name.

-----------------

Next Chapter

[acerace]

...you have opened my eyes to a vast universe of VintageBeef lore that I was unaware of. I knew about the New Hermit Order, of course, and the UHC invention, and I've watched a few of his CTM things but -- I will take all the info and lore you feel like giving out because Beef is amazing and my knowledge is so small.

Vintagebeef my beloved <3

So the thing is, right, until about 2016 I only watched two (2) youtubers- Vintagebeef for Minecraft and aDrive for Pokemon (and funnily enough both of them are named Dan irl). So I've watched most of Beef's videos over the years and have a general knowledge of most of his stuff, except because it's been like a decade I don't remember where most of the lore comes from XD

The thing with him is that he doesn't do Lore tm the way other mcyters often do lore- he doesn't have an extensive RP series to draw from like Grian, doesn't have a solo world with steadily increasing amounts of lore like Etho or Zisteau, and while he's played on SMPs and been involved in storylines before it's not really the focus of his episodes unlike with Evo or Legacy or Empires

So where does that leave us?

IRL, Beef always has multiple series running at the same time. Often he's playing on an smp while doing a singleplayer, often modded, series as well as a CTM or modpack with a group of friends. For example, right now he's playing on Hermitcraft, doing weekly Pixelmon and Building a Zoo episodes, and a CTM map with Slip. And to me, this translates to one thing: Beef is an adventurer. He travels frequently- he explores a world and when he decides he's done, he leaves for the next one. That's the basis of my personal interpretation of his series and his character for my writing.

Ok so reading this back, this got extremely long and didn't explain much in the way of lore, somehow? If anyone has any additions to add please do so, I am very definitely leaving out a lot and would love to see what other lore people remember and are using for Beef! I didn’t include the Hermitcraft stuff since my memory of season 4 is blurry (his base was themed after the Martian, that much I know, and he and Iskall were buddies :D) and most of the s5 NHO lore is best watched from Bdub’s perspective from what I remember, and the only s6 stuff is a single line in Hermitgang and then the Area 77 arc with its possibility of an NHO reunion which we did not get rip. And s7 of course had the cloning machine and also the Podzol Party as the main lore. So all the original rambling is still below the cut though it is very long, and I'm gonna bullet point the main stuff here instead:

Actual canonical things:

Invented UHC and was the only survivor of the first ever uhc (Mindcrack UHC s1)

Married to an ender dragon (one of the UHCs I think), later father to a different dragon (Mindcrack season 3? I think?)

Might not have legs if you choose to take that joke as canon (Mindcrack s2)

Was a wizard (RAD)

is a zookeeper (Building a Zoo) 

Had a wife and kids (Sims in Minecraft)

Part of the Trial of the B Team court case (Mindcrack)

NHO founder, founder of the Podzol Party (Hermitcraft)

Created a cloning machine that sort of works (Hermitcraft)

Played the Forest which is I believe the first time he and Keralis played together (look up the trigger warnings for this one, it's a horror game)

Was the creator/owner of Sourceblock SMP (featuring some familiar faces if you know Legacy, Empires, or MCC) and there is literal magic from a mysterious sourceblock of water that teleports people and summons mobs and probably more stuff that I haven't seen yet since I'm still watching it myself

Things you can infer:

Good with animals (Life in the Woods, Pixelmon, Ark)

Is a car nerd (irl and all of the car games he's played)

Is a highly experienced adventurer who has traveled through dozens of worlds both vanilla and modded, across multiple dimensions (Twilight Forest, the Aether, the Betweenlands, Limbo), completed dozens of monuments, fought in blood sports, survived apocalypse after apocalypse, tamed dinosaurs, and played a lot of prop hunt and golf with your friends

If you're looking for what to watch for lore purposes, I'd say the Mindcrack UHCs and Team Canada's RAD series are pretty good, definitely Sourceblock and HC s5, plus the Diversity CTM maps and Ruins of the Mindcrackers maybe? And Mindcrack Prank Wars for the chaos and the origin of Team Canada. And if you can handle horror than the Forest is fun and if you don't do horror you can watch the Pojkband play golf or prop hunt they're hilarious I love them sm I want a Pojkband reunion So Bad 

Beef's first series was a singleplayer series in beta 1.4_01 though he had played the game extensively before that, and was a big fan of Guude, having watched his own Minecraft videos. The series was functionally a hardcore one where if he died Beef would delete the world and start again! I haven't actually Watched this series so idk if he died or how often lmao. When Guude made Mindcrack, which was btw one of the very first Minecraft SMPs, he also hosted a competition for people to join, and Beef submitted a video (which is still viewable on his channel I believe!) and won, and was added to Mindcrack in season 2 :D (fun fact, Guude said that even if Beef hadn’t won he would have added him anyway) 

Two running jokes emerged from Mindcrack- pulling a Vintagebeef and Beef doesn't have legs. The first is a reference to Beef dying of fall damage (I believe the exact instance was him trying to jump into his swimming pool and failing spectacularly) and after the incident, every time someone died of fall damage they were pulling a Vintagebeef. The second joke comes from Guude, who joked that the reason Beef wasn't going to a convention was because he didn't have legs, and then he pranked Beef's base by building a giant pair of legs at the entrance to his castle so you had to walk between them to get into the base. This joke has long since died and both Beef and Guude feel pretty bad about it iirc because there were people who genuinely thought Beef was disabled and were emailing him supportive messages and stuff oops. So if you go looking on the Salad or find old Mindcrack fics, you might see references to Beef having prosthetic legs!

Mindcrack also brought about the creation of several Player groups- Team Nancy Drew, Team Canada, and GOB to name a few relevant to Beef. Team Nancy Drew consists of Beef, Pauseunpause, Guude, and Baj, who formed to investigate a prank on one of the members but I forget who. They're named Nancy Drew after the detective! Team Canada also formed in retaliation to pranks, with it consisting of Beef, Etho, and Pause, the three Canadian members on the server (not including Adlington who moved to Canada but never joined the group). There was also a Team America who pranked them with American flags everywhere. GOB is Guude, OMGChad, and Beef, who played stuff like the Ragecraft, Pantheon, and Monstrosity ctms together but that's way down the line lol

Team Nancy Drew is also notable for inventing UHC. It was Beef's brainchild but it was the four of them who first played it! The first UHC had the four of them working to kill the dragon with no natural regen, with everyone dying but Beef, who "won" the UHC. The second uhc was still dragon focused and iirc is where Beef married the dragon? Memories are hazy but they do kill the dragon in this one I think. UHC was then revamped as a pvp event and became a regular Mindcrack game every few months, featuring most of the Mindcrackers and several special guests, including Dinnerbone, who as we know Thanos-snapped Doc's arm out of existence as a result of Doc killing him in one of them

In one of the seasons of Mindcrack, Beef invited swedish Mindcracker and good friend Anderzel to go caving with him and invented ABBA Rules caving, where the winner takes it all. ABBA Rules is a game where each ore (and also dungeon loot like nametags) is assigned a point value and the person with the most points at the end wins and gets to keep all the stuff collected from the game.

In Mindcrack season 3?, Beef punched the ender dragon in an... awkward area, so when the dragon died and left the egg behind, Guude said Beef was the father of the egg XD I don't remember if I watched s3 so I have no idea if anything Happened with this concept but *history of the world voice* you could make lore out of this!

So Team Canada has played a Lot of CTM maps (which fun fact were pretty much invented by another Mindcrack member, Vechs, with his Super Hostile series! Super Hostile has a bunch of things called "Zistonian", which are references to another Mindcrack member Zisteau, who has a very wild singleplayer series with even wilder lore but I digress). In Ruins of the Mindcrackers, they had a running joke that Beef was Etho and Pause's mom, which is a joke we can leave in the past actually /lh. They also played all the Diversity maps, Sky Factory, Terra Restore, Uncharted Territory uhhh and a couple more ctms and adventure maps! Each map kinda has its own story so in Diversity 3 for example they were trapped in a simulation? I think? Team Canada also recently played the Roguelike Adventures and Dungeons modpack, aka RAD, in which Beef was a wizard with a magic staff that could do anything from summon lightning to control hostile mobs.

Sourceblock SMP is a vanilla survival 1.14 series that ran for one season and the series starts with each of the Players being drawn to a strange sparkling water source that, once they touch it, brings them to the Sourceblock world. It also summons a giant zombie at one point. There's probably more lore for this series but like I said I haven't watched it all the way through yet 

He has a Patreon server called VintageCraft and has done a series or two on there as well, and played a few UHCs with them, so lore that how you will! 

Beef also played a few popular mods, notably Pixelmon, Life in the Woods, and Feed the Beast, with LitW being singleplayer and the other multiplayer. He's also recently played the Zoo and Wild Animals mod a lot. He did a short series with the Minecraft Comes Alive mod where he married one of the villagers and had two children, so that's canon now :D he’s played a Lot of Pixelmon starting when the mod first came out iirc (he chose Turtwig in his first series and built a Grass gym, then made a Normal gym in another series in uhh 2016) and he still plays to this day. Quite a few Hermits played on his Pixelmon servers with him, like Wels, Etho, Iskall, Stress, Slip, Zueljin, and also Guude and Phedran (a Mindcrack adjacent player and creator of the LitW modpack) and a few Mindcrackers on the older servers 

Mindcrack and friends played a lot of other games too- 7 Days to Die, Ark Survival Evolved, Unturned, to name a few, so you can pull a lot of lore out of these as well. Speaking of friends and non-Minecraft games, Beef teamed up with Pause, Keralis, and Slip (a former Hermit) to play the horror game the Forest, which saw them stuck on an island trying to survive against terrifying mutated human... things. They played it a few times as the game updated but as afaik it's the first time Beef played with Keralis and possibly Slip and since the game starts with the Player's airplane crashing, that could totally be how Beef first met them in-universe 

I... think? that’s everything I mentioned in the tags? There is probably way more stuff I’ve forgotten that stems from inside jokes and things that happen within each series, but I hope that was a) helpful and b) at least somewhat comprehensible lmao 

[fallingappleshurt]

hi! I'm the anon that sent that other writing prompt with wilbur being all sneaky and detective mode. Here's another one if you want! :D Tommy and Techno are being bullied and Wilbur notices them acting slightly differently and just goes and fucking beats them up. If you cant tell i really like the idea of wilbur just going full detective mode and techno and tommy just never realize it

Wish you were who you said you were

Brrrrrrr I’m bad at answering asks but here we go!

To be completely honest I really hate how this came out, I tried to make it seem better but I don’t know what else to do, anon I’m really sorry but here we go.

Some of this is actually based on real life experience! So that’s fun.

This is based in the fd!au by Antarctica bay! Go love her! But I’m not tagging her in this shit story, sorry.

TW: For Some Bullying, nothing too graphic or extra

“I’m just saying that I don’t think that it was that good of a character arch,” Tommy said, pushing the apartment door open.

“That’s because you can’t read, did you try gettin’ good?” Techno said, slipping off his shoes, ignoring Tommy’s rebuke, he looked up to the living room and saw Wilbur sitting on the couch with someone he didn’t recognize.

He was going to ask who it was but Tommy beat him to the punch.

“Hey Wilbur, who’s that?”

“Oh this is Griffin, he’s a new student and one of my teachers asked me to show him around and he’s pretty cool,” Wilbur said, gesturing at the boy next to him, he gave a little wave, ���Hi,”

“Hello!”

“Hullo,”

“Griffin these are my brothers, Techno’s got the pink hair and the gremlin is Tommy,”

“Shut up,” Tommy flipped him off, heading towards his room. Techno sat down at the kitchen table, pulling out a homework sheet. He grabbed his earbuds when he heard Wilbur swear.

“Wait, where’s my phone?” The lock on Tommy’s door clicked, “Oh come on!” Wilbur jumped over the couch and ran up to the door, pounding against it furiously, “You child! Open the door!”

Griffin looked nervously between Techno at Wilbur, as if asking if this was out of the ordinary, Techno shrugged, calling to Wilbur, “Careful, we don’t want to get another noise complaint.”

Wilbur pounded on the door harder, “You gremlin! Don’t make me Jimmy the lock because I will then you’re dead!”

After a few minutes of fruitless threats and pounding Wilbur snapped and started digging around the hall closet for a wire coat hanger. Techno continued with his Government class’s work, he was so focused he didn’t realize Griffin had sat in the chair next to him, trying to start a conversation.

Griffin yanked one of his earbuds out, “Why are you ignoring me?” He asked, Techno raised an eyebrow.

“I’m not, I was just caught up in my work,”

Griffin rolled his eyes, “Sure, anyways, I wanted to ask you, why do you look so mad all the time?”

“You’ve known me for like 10 minutes-”

“I saw you in the hallway a lot earlier, I guess we have a lot of classes near each other, but you looked really mad, or annoyed I’m not really sure, but you just seem to constantly have a resting bitch face,”

Techno shrugged, “I’ve heard that before, I guess I do but-”

“Did you know a lot of people stare at you?”

“What?”

“A lot of people stare at you, or are you too caught up with yourself to notice that?”

Techno sat there, not sure how to respond, Griffin being in their apartment and him just casually insulting him.

“Heh, wow, can’t believe-” Griffin was cut off by Tommy shrieking. Wilbur had managed to unlock their door and jumped at Tommy, wrestling him for his phone back.

Griffin watched the scene before them, confusion sparking in his eyes, “Is that- is that, how do I say this, normal?”

“It’s a semi-normal thing,” Techno said, peering around Griffin, trying to get a better view of his brothers.

“Wow, I get what they said about you being pretentious,”

Techno shook his head, “What?” He paused, “Did I do something to offend you?” Griffin shrugged and walked over to Wilbur, who was just coming out of Tommy’s room with his phone in hand, hair disheveled and clothing wrinkled. They sat back down on the couch, chatting and laughing like nothing happened, Techno started back on his work.

He got in the zone, music back on, he fell into a rhythm and finished his Government work and half of his math work when their front door opened and Phil stumbled in. His shoulders were tight, clothes wrinkled and bunched, he set his stuff down on the table next to Techno’s backpack.

“Hey Techno, hey Wilbur, who’s this?”

“This is Griffin, he’s the new guy at school and he’s actually pretty cool,”

Phil snorted, “He’s ‘pretty cool’? That kind of sounds like an insult Wil,”

“I didn’t mean it in a bad way! He’s just shy but once you start talking to him,” Techno rolled his eyes but said nothing, yeah he seemed ‘real shy’. Phil smiled, “Is he staying for dinner?”

“Griffin wanna stay for dinner?” Wilbur asked, looking him in the eye, Techno silently hoped he’d say no.

“If you’ll have me,” Griffin said.

“Of course, I’m heating up leftover lasagna, are you okay with that?” Phil asked, turning on the oven. Griffin nodded, “Yeah!”

Techno bit his tongue and tried to go back to his mathwork. Soon he cleared off his and Phil’s stuff off the table, Tommy, after some prodding, came out and set out plates and utensils.

They all sat down, Tommy talking about the next basketball season and Phil telling them of some ridiculous customer who tried to use a coupon that was 3 years past the date. Griffin was quite for most of it, laughing along with Phil and rolling his eyes as Tommy talked about the stupid things the other boys on the team dared him to do.

“This is really good,” He commented about the food.

“Thank you, it’s just a recipe from the pasta box though,”

Techno stayed quiet, working his brain, trying to figure Griffin out. He didn’t say anything rude or backhanded and seemed like a normal, slightly nervous guy. Techno didn’t know if he had upset him in someway or what, maybe Griffin was just having an offday? Techno knew he wasn’t always the friendliest person and he could have been more accommodating, maybe it would have made Griffin feel less on edge.

The rest of the night seemed to go off without a hitch. Griffin helped them clean up, thanked them for the meal and Wilbur for showing him around, then left.

Techno had trouble falling asleep, thinking about the stuff Griffin said and Tommy shifting restlessly in the bunk above him, sleep was near impossible.

People had called him sarcastic and pretentious before but it never really bothered him, so why did Griffin saying it make him feel nauseous? The other thing was Griffin said people were staring at him? That was never good, were they talking about him or making fun of him behind his back?

Techno didn’t sleep much that night.

He managed to get about 3 hours of sleep between anxiety flashes and panicking to make sure he submitted the assignment on google classroom but he was able to forget about Griffin.

Until someone yanked on his hair while he was walking down the hall, hard. He stumbled back, surprised, when an arm was sloppily thrown around his shoulders.

“Hey man, you’re heading to Green’s bio class right? For the first period? I missed that period yesterday,” Griffin said, Techno frowned, trying to pull away but that only made Griffin tighten his grip.

“Yeah,” Techno said curtly, trying to avoid Griffin’s gaze, “Why do you care? Aren’t you a grade ahead of me?”

“Not in this subject, I was just wondering, could you show me the way?”

Techno eyed him up and down, he really didn’t want to be around Griffin but if they were going to the same place then there really was no avoiding it, begrudgingly nodding, “Sure.”

Techno led him down the hall with Griffin still gripping his shoulder sharply, Techno didn’t know if he was aware of what he was doing or not. They entered the classroom when Techno was finally able to pull away and get to his desk, he sat down and followed the directions on the board while Griffin talked to the teacher.

More students filed in, sitting on the deks, wandering around, chattering amongst themselves. The bell rang and Miss Green introduced Griffin;

“Hello everyone, I hope you had a good day. We have a new student, Griffin, would you like to say a few words about yourself?”

He stepped forwards nervously, waving, “Hi, My name is Griffin, I moved here from Taiga Township, I’m 16, I like weightlifting and I play the trumpet,” He chuckled, scratching the back of his neck, “Sorry, I’m not very interesting,”

Techno started zone out, Griffin made his brain hurt, he seemed so shy and awkward around other people, he was polite and despite his height was overall none threatening. So why did he say that stuff last night? Techno knew he didn’t imagine it, he hadn’t even met Griffin before that so he didn’t know if he offended him or not- it all made Techno’s head spin.

Griffin shuffled to his desk, the empty desk behind Techno’s, and sat down. Techno could feel him staring but chose to ignore it, trying to focus on the lesson. Mindless note taking calmed his head and nerves slightly, it felt nice just to follow along. The class was relatively easy, Miss Green finished with their notes and gave them a worksheet, saying that if it wasn’t finished in class it was homework. Techno worked on it until the bell rang, then packed up his stuff and headed towards his next class.

As he walked down the hall he heard footsteps coming up behind him when someone threw their arm around his shoulders again, gripping the same sore spot on his arm tightly.

“Hey man, could I get the answers from Bio?” Griffin’s strident voice filling his head. Techno shifted his shoulder.

“The notes or the worksheet?”

“Both?”

“No, you should have paid attention,” Techno responded curtly, he had a short internal argument about how he was being a hypocrite.

“Oh come on man! Cut me some slack, I just moved and everything has been really stressful, please?”

Techno bit the inside of his mouth, he didn’t want to just hand Griffin the answers for something he did jackshit on but at the same time he did just move…

“Fine,”

“Ah yes! Thank you man! Wilbur invited me over after school today so I’ll get them then!” Griffin suddenly released Techno, half jogging through the mosh pit of people in the hall, “Thanks again!”

Techno just sighed and continued to his next class, arm aching, hoping this wouldn’t become a routine.

It became a routine.

Everyday after bio Griffin would do the same song and dance of running up behind him, wrenching his hair, throwing his arm around his shoulders and asking for notes or homework answers. Techno would oblige, he didn’t want to disappoint Griffin and add stress after the guy had moved from the town he spent his whole life in.

But after a week it got old, Techno grew tired of it, he didn’t mind giving his friends answers if they had an off day or needed help or a break but this was pushing it, Griffin didn’t even do anything in class! He would just sit there and throw little paper balls everywhere, he didn’t even attempt to try.

Techno heard footsteps behind him and tensed up, a familiar arm tossed around his shoulders.

“Hey man, I can’t make it over after school today-”

“I’m not giving you the answers,” Techno interrupted, Griffin balked, “Wh-what do you mean?”

“It’s been a week, you need to start paying attention, I’m not giving you the answers anymore,” Techno tried to keep walking, wiggling his arm against Griffin’s now tightening grip.

“Come on- we’re friends! You wouldn’t leave a friend-”

“We’re not friends, you and Wilbur might be but we are just acquaintances, classmates at best. I don’t owe you anything-”

Techno was cut off when Griffin yanked him to a locker bay, slamming him against the metal.

“You think you’re cool? That you can talk down to me? That’s not the case,” Griffin gripped the front on Techno’s hoodie, other hand grasping the same tender spot on his arm. Techno’s heart was in his throat.

“You either give me the answers for our Bio homework or I’ll beat the shit out of you. If you’d like a reference your little brother has seen me in the weight room, are we clear?”

Techno’s mouth was dry, sharp tendrils wrapped around his chest. He felt small under Griffin’s dark stare. Eventually he was able to choke out;

“Okay-okay,”

“Good, I’ll get them from you later,” Instantly Griffin let go of his shirt, walking away, leaving Techno to try and collect his thoughts.

Tommy didn’t really talk to Griffin all that much, he had spent a lot of time at their apartment and seemed rather nice, just a little shy. He spent most of the time with Wilbur, doing homework or talking loudly. Tommy’s hand hurt from the constant pounding on the walls to get them to shut up. He had never seen them without each other.

Which was why he was surprised to get home and see Griffin sitting on the couch, scrolling through his phone.

“Uh, what are you doing here?” Tommy asked, taking his shoes off, Griffin looked up nonchalantly, “Just hanging out,”

“But Wilbur isn’t here, he’s at work,” Tommy pointed out, how did this guy get in?

“He said I could still come over,”

“That’s... weird,” Tommy trailed off, trying to find the right word.

“What is?”

“You just-just being here without Wilbur, it doesn’t seem right,”

“I don’t see what the big deal is, you’re just being aggressive but I guess that’s normal,” Griffin didn’t look up from his phone.

“What the hell are you on about?”

“I don’t want to repeat myself, of course that would also mean you would have to be shut up for once and listen,”

“Wow, you’re an asshole,” Tommy walked into the kitchen.

“You’re one to talk,”

“Stop talking shit, you don’t know me,” Tommy shot back, voicing growing louder, grabbing a cheese stick from the fridge.

“I know enough-”

“No you don’t! Shut-”

“God you are so loud man, do you ever shut up? Like at all? How about for once you just try to use your indoor voice? Or did you forget? This is why Phil always has a headache.”

Tommy paused, had he been making Phil more stressed?

“Wh-what do you mean?” Tommy cleared his throat.

“No but it’s obvious, he constantly talks about having headaches and how he wants some peace and quiet, it’s pretty clear he’s talking about you.”

Tommy swallowed, the apartment suddenly seemed too small, or he was too big, Wilbur had always teased him about his sudden growth spurt.

“What no come back?”

“Shut up man,” Tommy retorted but it had no real bite, he shuffled into his room and stayed there, he wanted to be along. He also locked Techno out, who was not happy about that, he ignored everyone until Wilbur pounded on the door telling him that dinner was ready.

Tommy walked out, heart dropping when he saw Griffin at the table. He stayed quiet throughout most of the meal, he’d laugh along with his brothers but didn’t offer much to the conversation.

Once they had finished Techno started on the dishes and, surprisingly, Griffin helped.

The rest of the night was normal, Griffin hung around for a while more before leaving, Tommy stayed in his room most of the night, anxiety getting the better of him. He didn’t want to cause Phil more stress, he already worked so hard. Wilbur helped with the bills and Techno did most, if not all of the chores, and Tommy realized he didn't do anything for them.

He messaged Tubbo, trying to take his mind off the panic that started to burn itself into his chest. They got into a call, Tubbo talking about the stray cat in his neighborhood and how it finally got close enough for Tubbo to pet, and how he now has a bandaged hand.

They continued to talk, Tommy’s anxiety starting to drip away, at least he wasn’t a burden to Tubbo, completely.

Griffin was spending more and more time at their apartment and it was starting to fry at Tommy’s nerves, the man was always there. He had also started to join in on his brother's teasing, which wasn’t a big issue.

But it also kind of was.

His brother’s jokes were always fun and lighthearted, they usually didn’t go too far and they were just that- jokes. Griffin’s jokes were stupid and borderline hurtful, a person can only go for so long hearing things like, “You’re such a fucking moron, how’d you even pass preschool?” or “Look, it’s the human version of a headache,” or “This is why you have to cheat off Tubbo, too fucking stupid to understand,” before it got too draining.

The only time he seemed to get a reprieve was when he stopped talking or just left the room all together, leaving the room was too noticeable and could ruin the mood so Tommy would just sit there, biting his tongue, and he continued to do that even after Griffin left.

He was tired.

When Wilbur had invited Griffin over he hadn't expected it to go so well. Griffin was easy going and funny, he and Wilbur would talk for hours, Techno and Tommy seemed to tolerate him and Phil liked him so their fate was sealed. He had been hanging around for a few weeks when Wilbur started to notice a few things.

First off Tommy was quiet, not every once and awhile but all of the time, he just didn’t seem to speak and if he did it was in an intentionally quiet tone.

Secondly Techno; he had been more jumpy then usual, Wilbur had tried to mess with his hair like he normally would but Techno would jerk away. When Wilbur asked Techno shrugged, “You scared me,” Wilbur grabbed the sides of his face, chittering at him in a singsong ‘baby’ voice “Awwww! I’m sorry my little Technoblade I’m sorry,”. Techno flipped him off and shoved him away.

Phil would randomly mess with his hair when bored or zoning out but most recently when Phil had gone to, Techno had ducked away.

Wilbur briefly considered if Griffin had anything to do with it but quickly pushed it away, he trusted him. Wilbur had racked his brain trying to think of reasons as to why his brothers were acting differently but he kept coming back to Griffin. They had started acting this way when Griffin showed up but Wilbur didn’t want to point fingers just yet, he’d just have to watch.

He got his answer in two days.

Wilbur had been heading to his math class when he saw Griffin run up behind Techno, grabbing his hair and pulling him back. Techno turned to face him, shoulders slumping, he pulled a folded piece of paper out of his pocket and handed it off to Griffin, whose eyes lit up.

He took the paper then walked past Techno, shoving him too hard to be friendly. Wilbur frowned, changing course, he walked up to Techno and tapped him on the shoulder.

“Hey what the fuck was that?” He asked sharply. Techno’s face faltered and gave him away but he still tried to play dumb.

“What was what?”

“The thing with Griffin with the paper, what was that?”

Techno froze, just staring at him, Wilbur could see the internal panic in his eyes.

“Don’t mentally check out on me,” Wilbur said, snapping his fingers in front of Techno’s face, “What happened?”

They stood there for a moment, much to the dismay of the other students, before Techno bolted. He dodged away from Wilbur and slipped into the crowd before Wilbur could grab him.

Wilbur groaned, calling after him, “What good does running do? We live together!” But he got no response.

Which is why he jumped Techno right as he got home from school. He had cut through a few neighborhoods and hoped a couple of fences to beat Techno home.

He grabbed his wrist firmly, trying to drag Techno into the living room, “I’ll give you credit, you managed to weasel out of the conversation for, like what, three hours or so? Nice going Tech, real clever.”

Techno said nothing, just staring at him with a blank expression.

“I’m not letting go of this so you can space out as much as you want, I’ve got nowhere to be,”

Techno scoffed, “I can definitely space out long then you can,”

“You’d think that-hey wait! Do not try to distract me, now tell me what happened earlier or I’m going to crush you,”

Techno shrugged, avoiding his gaze, “It’s not a big deal, just the answers for our Bio homework-”

“Why?”

“What do you mean why? He just needed some help-”

“Yeah but you don’t give answers, I’ve never seen you give direct answers to anyone other than Skeppy and Niki, that’s not like you.” Wilbur stared Techno down, trying to get him to break.

“So? People change, why are you so fixated on this?”

“It’s just that- You’ve been- both you and Tommy have been acting differently recently, it all started when Griffin showed up and I just- I don’t know, I’m kind of worried,” Wilbur trailed off, not sure what else to say.

Techno sighed, tapping his fingers on his knee nervously, “Uh, well, you're not wrong on the Griffin thing, uh, he,” He groaned, “Why is this so hard? Griffin did kind of threaten me and I know he has been saying shit to Tommy and he just laughs it off but I can tell it bothers him-”

“Hold on, he what?” Wilbur’s eyes narrowed, “He’s been talking shit about Tommy and threatening you? What the hell is wrong with him! He never seemed like the type of person to do this- are you okay?”

“I-I’m fine Wilbur, It’s not that big of a deal and-”

“It is a big deal! He acted like he was my friend, like some timid shy guy, and then he does this shit to you guys- what the hell is his problem!” He had stood up and started pacing, fist against his mouth, eyes flashing with fire.

Techno stood up, placing a hand on Wilbur’s shoulder, “It’s okay! It’s okay, it’s not that bad,” He wasn’t sure what to say to placate his brother when he was this mad.

“Oh I gonna kill him,”

“Don’t, you get suspended and then it’ll mess with your job and-”

“Okay fine, I’ll get him some other way but he’s never coming back here.”

It had been two days, Wilbur was just waiting for the right opening. He had acted pleasant around Griffin but everytime they would run into his brothers Wilbur saw what they were talking about, things he had previously tried to ignore, Tommy’s forced smile after a joke, Techno trying to pull away from Griffin’s iron grip on his shoulder, Griffin’s not so friendly shoves, and it made his blood boil.

Wilbur knew he had to confront him that day. It was after lunch, they were cutting through an empty locker bay when Wilbur shoved Griffin into the wall, arm across his chest.

“Wilbur what the fu-”

“Did you honestly think I wouldn’t find out how you’ve been treating my brothers?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about-”

“Don’t lie-”

“What has gotten into you? I haven’t done anything to your brothers!”

“Shut up, you can blabber and lie all you want, I don’t care, but if you ever even come close to my brothers I will beat you into the ground, do you understand me?”

Griffin said nothing, he just glared back at Wilbur.

“They are very important to me, never forget that,” He let go of Griffin, who half slid down the lockers.

Wilbur walked away, feeling confident that Griffin would stay away, otherwise he’d make him.

[impaladolan]

Capture - Grayson Dolan [8/-]

summary: y/n is quick to plot revenge.. but does she get away with it..?

warnings: swearing, alcohol consumption, and smut :)

a/n: i seriously love you

Anonymous said:

Ooohoohohoh I’m excited for her to steal his Rolex haha omg maybe she wears it and doesn’t give him it back when he asks for it OMG u know what would be cute!! if one day she goes snooping in his bedroom and tries on his chain necklace n rings and he walks out the shower n he’s like ummmm ok ily

Anonymous said:

i want y/n to ride gray’s thigh in his office, like he’s just got in still fully in his suite w his gun on his belt and she just walks in and strips 👀👀

Anonymous said:

I have an idea hehe!! WhYi f y/n gets drunk like she f inds alcohol in graysons office or kitchen or something and shes being really bratty but it’s so cute and she’s giving him nose kissies and hugging up and telling him stuff and he’s just listening and loving her

Relaxation.

That's how you'd explain the certain state of euphoria I'm embezzled within. Young love is a treacherous trap that can either end in favor, or be torn to shreds in only mere moments. To feel so passionate and fervently invested in someone you've only ever known and loved is such a thrill, and you could never forget those memories embedded in your mind.

Like right now, laying in bed while the sun's first shine leaks through the window and gleams down upon the two of us, nuzzled under the covers. His leg was wrapped over mine and his arms hung loosely around my hips, sheltering me from ever possibly leaving his grasp. I was the first to wake, but I dared not to move an inch.

The world around me was motionless, so peaceful and calm. Nothing could bother or disrupt the atmosphere around me. Everything felt so perfect, embraced by the one I love and the man I admire. Nothing, and I mean nothing, could ever unsettle me in this moment.

At least, that's what I keep telling myself...

A darkness warped over my newly sunken eyes, shielding the world around me. I called out his name, but nothing came out. The warmth I once felt upon my body, vanished into the air and seemed like it'd never return. The world became cold and useless, all the positivity and tranquility that once surrounded me was blown away and now, I sit in darkness;

All by myself.

Him.

-

It seemed too early in the morning to be awake at such an hour, but you had crashed shortly after making it back to your room last night. You were so mortified and embarrassed, for all those men to see you so vulnerable and being punished. Though, the crazy inside you kind of liked it, but still, it pushed boundaries.

Initially, you had wanted to sleep in all day, and hopefully never leave your room ever again. Although, today's forecast decided otherwise. A ground shaking rumble of thunder made you awaken and the shoestring lighting bolts strung across the darkened sky had drawn you in. Since you essentially have no concept of time, whatsoever, you had to believe it was early in the morning, unless you really had slept in all day...

It's been presumably an hour or so since you first fluttered your eyes open. By now, you had plotted a sickening revenge to his outrageous acts he had committed only a day ago. Of course, you had created horribly ill plans that even you could never pull off. Such as vandalizing his expensive vehicles or even trashing the entire house. You had even gone as far as to planning an "accidental" fire in the kitchen.

But something inside you had put a halt to those thoughts.

Other than not wanting to be known as a malicious arsonist, you had some sort of pull towards him— but what that pull was, you couldn't figure out. The phrase; " Darling, I may be a stranger to you, but you're no stranger to me," has been left in your mind ever since the words first left his mouth. You couldn't possibly help but wonder what that even meant. You felt like you've known him from a past life somehow, and that could potentially explain the affection you have towards him. All of that aside, you have to remember that he isn't who your brain morphs him in to be. He's a felon who's abducted you and has pulled you away from society and everything you've ever been a part of.

For some reason, that's hard for you to mentally consider.

Aside from criminalizing yourself too by creating a fire or becoming a vandalizer, the best option is to state your assertiveness and trespass the "laws" that he has forbidden you ro break. Unlike yesterday's escapades of you ruining the dining room table, today you were up for higher anticipated endeavours. You had it all planned out and you knew what you'd do in order to complete your vengeances.

And he's not going to be very happy...

The atmosphere above and around you still rumbles with the loud, crackling thunder and the strikes of lightning flooding certain increments of light through the surrounding windows pave your path to the daunting door. You were still dressed in the white shirt that could barely pass as acceptable in the public eye, and your feet were frozen at the first touch of the wooden floor. You kept on like you have done in the previous times you have left your room for mischievous reasons. You silently open the door, leaving it wide open as you crept out of your assigned room and into the hallway. You knew that the very first place you would go would be the kitchen. No, you aren't creating a fire or any of the sort, but you were going to raid the fridge and have your fill with what it has to offer.

You walk straight past the opening and right into the glorious establishment of cookware, like it was your very own home and you were just up for a midnight snack. In all honesty, you could get used to living here.

If only it weren't forced onto you, that is.

Your fingertips soon collide with the long, frigid handle of the refrigerator door and pull it wide open, marveling at the large display of different beverages and foods strategically set up. Of course, it was mainly veggies and several healthy-looking meal options. Which didn't surprise you whatsoever.

He has a nice physique for a reason...

You couldn't find anything that made your stomach growl with hunger, until you opened up the freezer drawer and spotted a nice looking ice cream container. Still, it looked healthy and it'd make you all the more frozen, but it would manage to subside your aching sweet tooth for now. You pop open the lid and fish around the drawers for a utensil. With a content sigh, you plunge a huge spoonful of the solid liquid and empty it into your mouth, savoring every last flavor like it would be the last time you'd ever eat the sugary treat again. It was delicious, the absolute best ice cream you've ever devoured in the entirety of your life.

You almost ate half the jar until you decided you were parched and needed a nice drink to soothe your throat. Luckily this time you were familiar with where the glasses were kept and already had your hand wrapped around a large wine glass that was a little bit higher up than the rest of the glassware. You set it down quietly, trailing your eyes upon the clean and prim counter.

A tall, fancy upscale bottle of what looked to be whiskey was settled in the corner, nicely organized with the other alcoholic beverages that were of the same importance.

Now, you weren't exactly a "drink-whiskey-out-of-a-wine-glass" type of gal, but as they say; desperate times call for desperate measures— and you were on the search of something to loosen you up a bit, and that was that.

You brought the glass over to where you had stationed your cup, not even flinching when you uncork the liquor and pour its contents out. With improper proportioning of the said liquid, you put the whiskey back how it was.

"Fuck, here we go." You inaudibly groan to yourself, just knowing that you'll regret every decision you've made in the near future. Raising up the plum-full glass, you tip it back into your mouth and down a whole gulp.

Nasty.

It's definitely an acquired taste, but the barely detectable taste of vanilla made it hardly feasible. You dared to not put the glass down until you were finished with it and had that sour taste submitted through your fiery throat.

The least you could say was that it's pretty smooth, but not something you'd drink in your free time.

In your head, you knew you'd feel a bit wonky, considering your nearly empty stomach and your abstinence from alcohol for the last month or so. It'd be easy to feel the side effects and overall feel much better, like you were aiming for.

Once you drained the glass of every last drop, you held your breath and rushed to the sink. The overwhelming want to just regurgitate what you ingested had drawn upon you, but you refrained from doing so. Waiting out the sickly feeling, you run a bit of cold water over your hand and press it against your forehead for a moment. Everything became hot, even with the freezing temperatures, you felt like breaking a sweat.

All just the side effects of alcohol, I'm sure.

Within the passing minutes, the faintness flew away and the sounds of the thunderstorm filled your ears. A large banging of the clouds above frightened you and you knocked over the glass you had just rested your lips on.

You didn't even feel bad about all the shattered pieces on the floor, it actually brought a smile to your face and you were ready to begin the fully planned extravaganza.

First stop; his room.

You skipped back the hallway, still quiet but not as careful as before. You weren't afraid of any consequences and whatever he was going to do to you wouldn't be too harsh. It's not like he's embarrassed you enough already anyway.

You easily find his door, pushing the handle down as slow as possible, just in case he was asleep in his room. His door didn't creak as you opened it, and nor did his floorboards as you walked straight into his marvelous bedroom. It was extravagant, but yet it still felt homely. You check the bed, no sign of him or anyone for the matter. He probably at a meeting, or something.

Not that you care..

You continue your stroll, glancing around his room for anything that could spark your immediate attention, considerably his desk. It held a lot of his more—fashionably inclined belongings. Such as his masculine jewelry and expensive watches. There was even a small, purple ring that reminded you of something you had worn a long time ago. You brush that off, it brings up sore wounds from a time where you were a lot happier and everything was simpler.

I wish I could say that now..

You began to pick up the neatly placed objects, slipping a couple of heavy necklaces around your neck and the large rings upon your fingers. You laugh at the size difference of your hand and how they barely stay on your fingers.

The stationary mirror attached to the desk caught your eyes, and you begin to make funny faces at it. Which sends you into a hushed giggle fest that makes you double over in your seat. Still caught up in your laughter, you take off all of the rings, just leaving a couple on the desk and tossing a few over to his bed. You do the same with the necklaces, except for the two that you threw into one of the drawers.

That’s when your eyes caught the nice watches, stuffed in clear pouches with the brand labeled across them. Rolex is the first you saw, and the first one you picked up. You weren’t thinking clearly. Hence the reason you tore it out of it’s protective packaging and brought it up above your head, throwing it down to the ground and watching the tiny glass fragments splatter everywhere.

It’s not like he can’t buy a new one, right?

Feeling content and a little less frustrated, you left the messy scene and followed your footsteps back into the hallway. He didn't seem to hear you, so the determination to find out his name came across your mind and you became dead set on finding it, so you basically sprinted into his ominous office and delved into his comfy chair without care.

Your motor skills were altered and it seemed to take for ever to lift yourself out of the chair and tap on the computer keyboard for it to wake up. While it began its process of turning on, you led your hand down to the drawers and pulled at them. And that’s when you found the very first locked up thing in this house.

“Care to tell me what you’re doing in here darling?” His alluring voice blasted through your ears and made you leap upward. “It’s not been a day and you’re already back to being a brat?” You couldn’t see what he looked like, but his silhouette looked suited and enticing.

Very enticing, actually...

“M’trying to find out your name, Daddy.” You spoke before you could think, crossing your arms over your chest while your lips form a pout. His body leaves from the doorway, and you’re barely able to see him as he strides over towards you. Suddenly, a light flips on and you’re met with his beautiful frame, a smile daunting his face as he looks down at your innocence.

“You have no idea what you do to me, do you?” He moves closer, wrapping his hand under your chin while his other has his blazer hung on his finger and thrown towards his back. He looks cute in a smile, until it forms into a confused frown.

“Have you been drinking, Y/N?” Your eyes widen and you quickly nod. You knew you’d be in trouble with him anyway, so might as well be honest now. “I c-couldn’t sleep and I- I just wanted a sip of somethin’.” You shrug, looking downward as you give him an okayish explanation.

“You know what helps me sleep?” He lets your chin go, dropping his jacket and beginning to roll up his dress-shirt’s sleeves. You shake your head, chewing your bottom lip as you take in his appearance. “A nice cocksucking does.” Thunder crackles loudly outside as his husky voice deepens and makes a cool wind run down your spine.

“Then let me help you..” You wrap your arms around his neck, twisting him around and forcefully pushing him down in the chair you were once sitting in. You were about to fall to your knees to “help” him, but he pulls your hips towards him and sets you on his lap. You replace your hands around his neck, sinking your fingertips into his hair and massaging the silky softness of it. He sweetly sighs, readjusting the leg you were sat upon.

And that’s when you feel the sensation you’ve been craving for however long you’ve been here.. you think..

“M’hm, do that again..” You ask, your voice barely above a whisper. He actually obliges, his brows furrowed as he watches your face contort. “Like riding my thigh, huh?” He asks as he placed his large hands around your waist. You nod, moving your hips in the same direction. You eyes shut, your head falling back a little as you smoothly move against his muscled thigh.

It felt so good, everything felt so good actually. He somehow looked so much more attractive, the beard dotting his face and his hair styled nicely. Even what he was wearing had you wanting more.

You open your eyes for a moment, watching his pleased expression as he watches you needingly thrust yourself upon his warm, clothed thigh. He even steadily lifted his knee in the correct places, aiding in the pleasure that him alone could bring you. Your eyesight seemed foggy but visible enough to see the gun at his waist side, and you almost froze when you saw it. Even in your intoxicated state of mind, you knew that just the weapon could possibly help you escape and make it back to your own home.

You didn't think it through thoroughly..

You lean in, your lips next to his ear as you practically collapse upon him, though your movements to further yourself towards releasing didn't halt. You slipped your left hand down to his waist band, sensually gliding it over his tented groin. He shutters under your touch, clearing his throat as his heads falls back slightly. As quick as your body would let you, you grab for the handle of the gun and raise it up towards his forehead, stopping all your movements and gaining his attention.

"Y/N—" He starts, gliding his hands up your bare thighs.

"Don't fucking move, or I'll— I'll shoot you." You sounded clear as day in your head, but your words became slurred as they left your mouth, and he smirked at your innocence. Just as quickly as you pulled the gun, he took it away.

He grabbed the barrel and snatched it from your grip, placing it back into its holster at his side. You yelp as he grabs your wrists, twisting them around your back and slamming you into the table with an evil chuckle. "Better keep those hands pretty little hands to yourself, princess. You're too innocent to commit murder anyway." He continues his hoarse chuckles, licking a stripe up his hand before striking your slick pussy. "D-Ahh!" You hiccup, pressing your legs as close together as you can.

“Better fuckin’ pray that you can walk tomorrow, darling...”

to be continued...

[luzial]

I recently commissioned @salesart to do a portrait of Solas (aka “Song”) and Lavellan (aka “Ink”) from my fic, In And Out Of Time Again. I’m so thrilled with how it came out, especially all the little details that reference their codenames. Thank you SO MUCH to Sales for all your work on this piece, and for asking me all the hard-hitting questions like “what’s their height difference.” I had so much fun collaborating with you!

The first chapter of In And Out of Time Again is below the cut, and you can read the completed work on AO3.

Song has had many names. The latest suits him no better nor worse than the others. If he has one complaint, it is that this name lacks specificity. Fen’Harel was a name that was a lie, and a lie that has long since become irrelevant, but he cannot argue that it painted a clear and awful portrait. His other name, the one that came both before and after, he is only too glad to be rid of. He rarely thinks of it now.

Song is in his element in Strands like these, when he can submit to the demands of his teeth and claws and blessedly forget the version of himself that is not like this. It is simple here in the verdant expanse of his home, his first love. When a mountain stands in his way he moves it with a thought. When a beating heart must be silenced, he rips into it and tastes warm blood on his tongue.

His assignment today is a wonderfully simple one: a death. The target is ancient and powerful, though only in comparison to the other things of its world. Beside an agent of Music, it is nothing. He longs for a crush of strength against his own and for the moment when uncertainty asks him whether he can snap his target’s neck before it breaks him in two. The answer, of course, is that he will hear the crack of bone and hold its dying form within his jaws too quickly to satisfy the hunger that burns within him.

Still, he will try to afford it a fair fight.

When he finds the edges of its lair, Song realizes something is wrong. Demons should swarm around him, challenging his right to intrude on their master’s territory even as he cuts them down. There should be whispers here, a choir of disembodied voices singing the Melody’s secrets for those who know how to listen. Yet all that greets him are emptiness and silence.

The raw Fade has begun to reclaim this place, the green waters of its currents rising up to erode the poisoned ground that has been here for three thousand years. Song wanders farther in, his paws sinking deep into the muck, until finally he finds the corpse.

The fear demon that claimed this part of the Fade is gone, reduced to a husk of tangled limbs and fangs that still drip with venom. Song has arrived too late. The death has already been administered, but this means that the timing is all wrong, and for Music, timing is everything.

Whatever killed the demon has done so before it had a chance to strike a bargain with a young mage girl in Kirkwall. Now she will not murder her family and dozens of others; she will not leave alive one angry, orphaned sister. Thanks to this single fault in the rhythm, the entire Strand is lost.

Song is so annoyed by all the absences that at first he does not notice the addition. It is so impossibly out of place that for a moment he simply stares at it. Stuck to the venom on the dead demon’s fangs is a piece of finely-made paper that smells of sugar and flowers, its perfume somehow drowning the stench of the rotting carcass. He reaches out for it with a hand and fingers; it is a thing too delicate to be held by claws. The venom stings but he pays it no mind, for he has seen the single line written on the page in a delicate script: Touch me with fire that I be cleansed.  

It must be a trap. Not the venom, of course. Whoever left this certainly knows it will take much more than that to wound him. It would be best to leave the note here and let it rot along with the rest of this discordant Strand. But this is a challenge and an invitation - words that hint at more words.  

Song ignites the paper between his fingers and it is as if he has turned the first page in a book. He reads, and when he is done he has become the wolf again, mouth twisted to a snarl. When he has committed the words to memory, he shreds what’s left of the sweet-smelling paper between his claws and grinds it into the mud.

When Song is gone, a shade steps into the pawprints he left and searches until it finds every piece of the burned, shredded, filthy paper.

--------

Tell me I have sung to Your approval.

I’ve always been fond of the Canticle of Transfigurations, or at least of the versions that I’ve penned. Hopefully you have more than a passing familiarity with it as well, or the cosmic cleverness of what I’ve just done will be totally wasted on you. (But I suspect your familiarity is more than passing. If you are who I think you are, you’ve probably written versions of it yourself. If so, how do you deal with the bit in 10:1 about the moth and the flame? I feel like I can never get it quite ominous enough, you know?)

I’ve barely just begun and already I’ve distracted myself with all the questions I wish to ask you. But that just speaks to my point (that I’m about to make).

Is there anything in this world more insidious than words? It took me eight of them to grab your attention. Honestly, I could have managed it in fewer if I didn’t want to make a dramatic entrance. But I did.

I’ve been curious about you for a while now. It’s not like there are many things left to be curious about when you have all of time to catch up on anything you might have missed, so I should thank you for that novelty. I think the first time I saw you was during that bad business in the Deep Roads in Strand 398. I was the hurlock, you were the Grey Warden recruit. Our eyes met as I bit into your commander’s neck and tore out his windpipe. (Sorry about the mess, by the way - I really enjoy getting into character.)

You were definitely meant to lose that fight. I know - I’ve gone back and checked a lot of other Strands and that recruit always dies, the darkspawn always swarm, and the Third Blight always begins. But then you single-handedly cut down the horde after everyone else in your party had died. (I know because I stuck around after you chopped off my head with that broadsword - I just had to see what would happen!) You killed enough of them to prevent the swarm, even though you died for it in the end. (And of course you died for it - you’re good but no one’s that good.)

My point is: do you remember how it felt when that shriek bit into your arm and the Blight burned into your veins? Do you remember the way it spiraled into you, burrowing in your lungs and your heart and your gut until it felt like your body had always been its home? (I’ve been Blighted a lot so I’ve got some pretty good descriptors for it.)

Anyway, let me spell it out in case my metaphors are getting too convoluted: In this letter, I’m the shriek and my words are the Blight. I’ve bitten you and poured my words into you. Your memory will pump them through your mind just as surely as your heart pumped the Blight to the tips of your fingers and toes. Want a cure? Too bad, there isn’t one.

I’m not only writing to gloat. I meant what I said above - I appreciate the novelty you’ve brought to the battlefield. Things are dreadfully dull most of the time. Mainly the Story sends me off to retcon the occasional plot holes your Music introduces to the narrative. There’s very little chance for improvisation, so I have to find amusement where I can.

And this has been very amusing.

Sincerely, Ink

(Keep reading on AO3)

[cosmiclatte28]

6 Shots of Coffee (Jaemin x you + Dreamies)

a/n: I am back! With a sudden wild oneshot. Please be aware that this is purely fan-fiction. Anything happening here is mere pure imagination. I did not intend to connect any disorders with the idols in real life.

Warning : characters with disorders, a lot of dozing off characters, character with slight adhd (i tried my best to picture them correctly but I’m sorry if everything is wrong, i only did a short research). Mentions of orphanage, drunk parents, and a broken family. HAPPY ENDING! 

CHARACTERS : dream (minus Hyuck and Mark), Taeyong, and Yuta also our brave (y/n)! 

here we go, 

If there are three things in life you hate, that will be Jaemin, Jaemin, and oh god another team assignment with Jaemin!

Jaemin has been the most excruciating classmate you ever have! Not only did he tease you about your freakin need of keeping things in their proper place and keeping things spotless, but he also keeps using you to help him pass his classes. Yet no teacher minds your complain, and all the school girls think you're a freak for being mad about sharing a group project with the handsome guy.

No you’re not sick or weird. You just love organizing things and you like clean things a bit too much. Why? Coz you've had some bad memories with dirty things. Okay Jaemin is just another naughty kid in your class who likes to play and have fun with others, but you certainly did not find his jokes funny.

“Come on calm down (y/n)! It's only coffee, we can clean that.” Jaemin tries to laugh it off despite seeing you standing completely frozen in front of him with an empty cup and you with a  brown uniform. Although you clearly see there is a slight worry in his eyes.

You hold yourself back. How come the worst day has to become worse?! You woke up to period cramps, you forgot a homework thanks to late night distracted room cleaning, and as you were about to rush to type your homework in the library, Jaemin decided to meddle and spill his coffee on your white uniform.

A part of you want to scream and yell and pull his hair apart, but you're too tired to talk with Jaemin. Let alone think about Jaemin, there's just so many things you hate related to Jaemin.

Despite him trying his best to apologize and to help you wash your clothes, which is something new… Jaemin never cared if he messed up with you. You ended up slapping his hand away when he wants to drag you to the office to ask a spare uniform.

“Go away! I have to rush,” you push him aside with your shoulder and run to the library. Knowing so well you'll probably get another minus score and a weird look from the library thanks to your stained uniform.

You hate the feeling of sitting down with this coffee stained shirt, and as much as you want to open that shirt and change into something else, you don’t have the energy. So, after sitting down on the table with the library's laptop you stare into the keyboard only to focus more on your uniform and the least wanted thing happens.

You cry. You cry by yourself in the corner of the room and you don’t really mind the stare they give. You just want to end life here, can anyone just stab you? Or can the ground split and swallow you?

There’s another thing you hate other than Jaemin meddling with your ugly life. It's dirt and unorganized objects. Why? Well you were once a very regular kid, always playing in the rain mud and all kinds of sand. You don’t mind having dirt all over your body you know when you go home you can shower. That's until you grow up and notice how your family is different. Your parents look like they are okay, but every night you hear them argue and argue. The argument gets stronger and scarier, they shout, scream, throw things down and you were always awaken to the no longer comfy homey house. You realize one day you woke up to seeing your dad getting drunk, your mother depressed, and the house super dirty like a tornado just hold a party. It’s awful to wake up to the smell of cigar and alcohols instead of bacons and eggs. You had to keep one plate with you or else it will end up like its friends, lifeless, prickly, sharp, on the ground.

Your maid stopped working, you're moved to a new school, this middle school where you meet Jaemin and some other annoying problematic students. Your once colorful life turned dark and gloomy. No longer you woke up to morning kiss and breakfast. You find yourself sitting alone in the dining room, preparing your own sandwich from some cheap dry bread. No more nutella and you're grateful for butter.

You tried to understand, keeping all to yourself as you grow up and noticed your family is broken. You thought everything will get better, one day mom and dad will love each other again and you'll be back with the bright family you love.

Life is not that kind. Life is cruel, on your 14th birthday your dad left for another woman and your mother dropped you off to an orphanage. She said she can no longer pay for your school and living fees. Heck she even had to borrow money to buy you your monthly pads.

The cheerful friendly you turned 180° into a mournful secretive teenager. You hate everyone who looks bright and you hate every single dirt. Seeing unorganized things and dirty objects just remind you of the dark memories you want to forget.

The orphanage found your smart talent and you got a scholarship making you still able to attend the school. The orphanage you live in has a rule where there is a schedule for cleaning up and preparing dish. You meet a similar boy who has the same problem with you; just that he looks like he had overcome his bitterness and chooses to live a happy life. Which you deadly want to do but cannot.

Renjun, is the only person you talk to in that house. The adults taking care over you, still cannot make you talk comfortably with him and you're not planning to do any sooner.

“Hey, it's me. Should we make a letter to the office and go home?” Renjun's soft voice comes to your ear and you look up to him with blood red eyes.

“How long have I been crying?” you sniffle.

He shrugs his shoulder “I just came an hour ago when I noticed you're missing Chemistry class and Jaemin too. I thought he was with you.”

You scowl “Why would I be with Jaemin?”

Renjun scratches his head “I don’t know… you were always assigned a team with him… I thought both of you are rushing a task.”

“I am having a bad day.” You exhale.

Renjun shakes his head “That is more than a bad day. Here, put this on that coffee is hot or cold?” he gives you his school blazer and you gladly put it over your stained uniform.

You sigh, of course Renjun noticed. He is also like you, despise any single speck of dust.

“Jaemin spilled his cold coffee on me. Now I am late to submit my work, I'll never get the essay done and I am skipping classes. GREAT! Looks like I will be kicked out of school next week.”

Renjun shakes his head again “Silly, you're dramatic. They won’t kick you just because of that. What about your achievements?”

You scoff “They can always find another better painter. I could barely tell difference in colors.”

Renjun smiles well that’s what makes you different. The school honors your brilliant talent of drawing although you have a hard time distinguishing colors. But your emotions are well delivered on every picture you paint. That gives honor to the school when the art teacher secretly sent your works to different curators and exhibitions.

“Come, we will go home. I'll make your letter. Can you wait for me in the lobby by yourself?” Renjun smooths your hair away.

You shake your head and clearly looks afraid “Can I join you?”

He nods and lets you go with him, blaming himself for ever offering you that option.

You got home, Renjun fixes your mood by giving you new clothes. Yes, as simple as that, and you’re already less scarier than before. He makes you tea when he saw the circled date on the calendar and drops you some pain killers.

“It's that month, sorry for not noticing had I known, I'd bring you home when I heard Jaemin looking for you around the school.”

You pause from cutting the potatoes, well you need to start cooking dinner for the others. “Jaemin looked around for me?”

Renjun nods “Uh huh that's also how I know something is not right. Jaemin never looked for you except when he needs your score.”

You curl your lips “Weird. He also wanted to bring me to the office, which he never did before.”

Your sudden emotional change is a regular thing to Renjun. Although at first he has to bear with your monthly exploding sensitivity since you're the first teenage girl in this house, Renjun manages to tame you down when he calmly offer you a cup of warm chamomile tea you love.

“Maybe it’s the coffee.” You shrug it off. Come to think of it, you never see the school selling coffee but Jaemin always brings his cup of super dark coffee.

“Oh home early?” Taeyong, the oldest son of the orphanage owner, greets you both. Well Taeyong is like the head matron here, every school letter directed to him and every new kid will meet him.

“It's not her day. I brought her home before she spent another day dozing off in the school's garden.” Renjun whispers to Taeyong and the older just nods his head.

“Oh! Did I mention to you we will have a new family tonight? Please be nice, he comes from this neighborhood and we actually had been waiting for his arrival since last month, but he always escaped before his vise parents want to drop him here.

You grow annoyed at this news. Well you don’t really like having to act kind and good in front of the others. Especially when meeting new members. Taeyong always asked you to at least be welcoming and less patronizing but you cannot keep your resting bitch face to yourself.

“I might as well skip dinner.” You taunt at Taeyong “No way I am acting kind in front of that person when I had a shitty day.”

Taeyong just hums to your threat, it is nothing new. You're a stone heart and he doesn’t want to have to slap you because of your stubbornness.

“I don’t mind. Just try to be welcoming, he had a rough time too.” Taeyong waves his hand and disappears behind his study room.

“I wonder who is going to join us. Our dining table is empty after Mark and Hyuck got adopted.” Renjun is excited to welcome the new family, maybe because he really likes it better here and therefore, he wants to make sure everyone else is welcomed.

Unlike you who still can't swallow the bitter truth. For you, your real family was the best, yet you didn’t know when everything started to fall apart.

The other comes home, you see Jisung, Jeno, and Chenle coming from the backyard and you hide yourself back on your room. Dinner is ready they just have to heat it up. The stew.

You close your window and come back to sit in front of your paper. Trying to remember what project you missed and have to do.

You look around the room, you used to have a bigger room, but after Taeyong knew you cannot stay still when there are mess, he moved you to a smaller room where you cannot store so many things. He said its for your own good. He doesn’t want you to stress yourself and distract your studies just to clean things up.

You feel your stomach rumbling but when you hear the noisy sound downstairs, you remember the new family. Actually, you are curious, so you sneak from your room and take a peek from the walls.

Your mind might be playing tricks on you, you rub your eyes and focus more to the familiar man in the same uniform as yours. You want to doubt it, but when you hear Jisung repeats his name you want to jump away from this house and run far away.

Life must have hated you so much to send Na Jaemin not only to your school but also to your “house".

Although you try to ignore him, your mind wonders what makes him come here. He looks like he is okay, only naughty, but he doesn’t look like an orphan.

“Dinner?” Yuta, Taeyong's younger brother asks you when he was about to go down and greet Jaemin.

You quickly gasp and shake your head before making a quick run to lock yourself in your room.

You try to think of any reason why Jaemin is here… from dinner to nine you cannot think of doing other thing rather than fiddling with your pen as you let your brain wonder and wonder.

Only around twelve did you suddenly jolt and realize you've wasted another night without doing your paper. You hear a step on the squeaky floor, and you have to stay quiet. Taeyong and Yuta wouldn’t like seeing you still awake this late. However, you don’t recognize the footsteps. Must be Jaemin’s.

The next morning, you escape earlier from the house. Leaving before breakfast for the sake of not meeting Jaemin. You're still mad at him and you hate him. You hate him for giving you hard times at school and now at “home".

You were waiting in the class when suddenly Jaemin comes into the class with a nervous face. You wonder did he just see a ghost? Jaemin really looks out of his place. Did he finally realize he is thrown away to the orphanage? Or did he finally realize you're secretly writing foot notes to the teacher that Jaemin is only leeching on your grades? Did he get called by the office?

You try your best to stop distracting your mind and continue working your essay. Thank goodness you can submit the work when the teacher leaves the class, only then did you see Jaemin's frozen state on his chair.

“Jaem?” you surprise yourself too for calling out his name. He also looks surprised.

“Yes?” he puts on his damn sickening pretty smile back like he always did to other students.

“Erase that smile. It's creepy.” You mutter and the other girls in your class is wanting to end you up there and then.

“Sorry, it’s just that… I … I didn’t get my coffee this morning.”

You raise your brow, oh right. Taeyong and Yuta are not giving us caffeine until we are 20.

You raise a brow “And? Can’t you skip once?”

His feet thump on the floor and he looks around nervously “You're right. I- don’t mind me.” He stands up and suddenly leaves you with bigger question mark in your head.

He sure is weird. What’s wrong with skipping one cup of that bitter liquid?

--

“(Y/n)! Come let's go home.” Renjun greets you on the lobby as you wait for the youngers to come too.

“Noona, you should meet Jaemin hyung! He is so sweet last night!” Jisung tugs on your uniform.

You frown and shudder your shoulder “Jisung, I hate that man.”

Jeno just laughs at your words and at Jisung's surprised expression “So, should we wait for him?”

You click your tongue “Actually that weird man left class after the first session and did not come back to class. Maybe he ran away. Let's go before it rains.” You start leaving the lobby, but no one follows you.

“Is it because of us?” Jisung worriedly asks his brothers.

Renjun thinks for a while “You mean what happened this morning?”

Jisung nods. Your ear can still hear them, for they start walking after you too. You have to hold yourself from turning around and asking them what happened this morning that made him weird!

When the five of you enter the house, that's when your brain finally clicked on what Jaemin must be suffering.

There in the middle of the living room, is Jaemin looking so uncomfortable as he forces his hand to write on a paper with a textbook opened by his side, but what comes out of his hand is just scribbles of lines and curves and he looks like he is painting instead of writing an essay.

“So damn hard to be productive!” he suddenly throws his pen and pulls his hair. All five of you are shocked to see this. Even you! You never see this side of Jaemin in school.  He always looks like the charming prince every girl’s crush, but this is definitely not the same man.

His lips are trembling, limbs unable to stop shaking and he looks in pain. And he starts to hit himself as if scolding his body for not cooperating.

You are in awe and you have to quickly usher Jisung and Chenle away.

“Jaemin! Calm down okay.” Jeno and Renjun quickly stand by his side and tries to keep the boy from hitting himself.

You bring Jisung and Chenle to their rooms while your head is quickly thinking of what to do. You sure see he is panicking and he's throwing tantrum. Taeyong and Yuta are not here yet but when you see your reflection on the window with a clean uniform suddenly your mind reminds you of the incident yesterday.

Coffee. Na Jaemin needs coffee. As silly as it sounds, you've read somewhere that coffee can help someone with ADHD or something like that. You're not sure, but you want to give it a chance. You run to your room, break your saving jar and pick out the bills you've been saving.

“Jaemin, how many shots?” you ask him when you pass through him.

Renjun and Jeno look at you with question in their face but Jaemin understands you and holds out a number with his hand.

Your eyes widen but you run to the nearest coffee shop, the one with the brand you always see Jaemin holding.

“Give me americano with six shots of espresso. Cold I don’t know with water or not.” You sound as mad as a hatter, but the barista seems to notice something.

“Are you by any chance taking an order for Jaemin?” he asks you nod your head baffled that he is a regular here until the shift knows his order and name.

“I was confused when the morning shift told me Jaemin skipped his coffee today. Alright i'll make it like how he always orders.” The man with a name tag Mark punches the bill and gives you the amount.

You don’t mind paying such high price for the black bitter drink you never like, as soon as Mark hands you the drink you walk as fast as you can back to the house.

You see Renjun waiting for you in the porch and he looks pale.

“Where did you go?! I was worried.” Renjun almost scolds you for leaving suddenly.

You walk past him “Jaemin! I have your coffee.” You yell at him, who is currently staring on the TV that's off. Jeno is still sitting next to him, afraid that Jaemin will do anything dangerous.

Jaemin's eyes widen as he quickly takes over the drink and gulp it down like his life depends on it.

All three of you wait for him to finish half of his drink and like magic, Jaemin looks calmer.

He closes his eyes and leans on the couch. His head rests on the small pillow Jeno tosses to him and you can see his usual self back.

After ten minutes, he opens his eyes stretches his body and like a robot who has his reset button pressed, Jaemin shoots a “what?” look to the three of you.

“Sorry if I freaked all of you out. I…” he shyly scratches his head “I have a minor ADHD and … coffee seems to be helping me focus and calm down.”

Now everything clicks. You understand why the teacher actually always assigned you with him, because no one else can handle Jaemin as patient as you and you're too blunt to notice he has his own trouble. You understand why he always brings a coffee to the class and why he looks calm when he has them. Unlike yesterday when he spilled it over you, you clearly see a slight terror in his eyes, and he disappeared from class. Maybe he was shy of showing his true self in class. You now know the reason he skipped class today because of the lack of caffeine and you just didn’t know he is also as wrecked as you guys.

That night, Jaemin knocks on your door and invites you to join dinner.

“You skipped dinner last night, I don’t know if it’s because I was there… and yesterday I was really ruining your day. I'm sorry I wasn’t a good friend too at school.” Jaemin speaks rather in a calm tone and you're taken aback he can speak in a soft kind voice and not the high pitch annoying teasing voice you regular get in school.

You're flustered, but you quickly put back your cold face “It's okay. T'was my fault too not looking the way.  Don’t worry I skipped dinner last night coz I am not hungry.” You lied.

No way you were going to spill the truth to him, not when you already know how hard his days are. He was not as bright and happy as he looks like.

“Renjun told me last night everything about you. I am so sorry…I didn’t know my jokes were very painful and disturbing to you. I should’ve stopped but you know I sometimes cannot hold my brain back.” Chuckles Jaemin nervously.

You sigh and place a hand on his shoulder “Life is hard right?” He nods his head and you squeeze his shoulder, “We also find it hard. But at least we're not alone now. We have each other and the others too. I am also sorry for picking on you to the teacher for leeching my score, but I promise I won’t do that again. I'll help you Jaemin.” You smile sincerely to him.

His face brightens “You're the best! I always have hard time focusing! Well coffee helps me, but still it's not healthy.”

You take his hand in yours “Na Jaemin, you're a part of our family now. Since we're family, we will get each other's back! Don’t worry things will be okay and you too will be okay!”

He Smiles and that is a new smile you've ever seen on him. A smile that's pure and true. That shows he too is also a human who can feel pain not just the angelic handsome boy in class.

“We should eat. The others are waiting,” Chenle's appearance in the hallway makes you and Jaemin turn your heads to him.

“She's right. We're family, now family eats dinner, together right? Come on! Taeyong hyung got us some pizzas for your welcome party.” Chenle drags the taller man's hand which automatically pulls you too.

A smile comes to your face when you realize just how perfect this imperfect family is!

Yes you also struggled focusing on a certain job, yes you also hate messy stuffs, yes it's true Renjun took three months to open his mouth and speak complete sentences, it also takes Jeno five months to be true about his feelings, and Jisung plus Chenle? They also have their fish to fry. Now Jaemin, is here with his own battle that will soon be shared within us.

Just like the famous quote, Ohana means family and family means no one is left behind.

Looking around the table, although you really wish you have a sister or a mother figure here, you're more than happy to call the 7 men your brothers and families.

end

please let me know if there are anything I can fix. I am trying a new genre and it’s a bit challenging but I am happy with finishing this. 

Contact or reach me out if you have any curiosity of what happens to the members or maybe you wonder what their problems are. 

Thank you for reading :D 🤗💖

[morningfears]

Nontraditional Graduation

Rating: PG

Summary: Calum feels bad that you have to miss graduation so he takes it upon himself to give you the best nontraditional graduation he can. || ((The class of 2020′s graduation isn’t exactly looking like the traditional graduation and as a member of that class, I was a little upset about it. So, here’s my take on a comfort fic.))

Word Count: 2.8k

Quarantine was, for lack of a better word, strange.

There were parts of it, namely spending your days with Calum and Duke in some sort of domestic fantasy, making up for lost time, that were almost nice. Not having to leave your home and go out into the world was almost nice, too. Under any other circumstances, you would’ve relished in these things. However, life felt a bit surreal and reality weighed heavily on your shoulders.

The street you lived on was never busy but as neighbors hunkered down and waited, the street (and city itself) was quiet. You saw the occasional neighbor out for a walk, never straying too far from their own home, and the mail carrier making their rounds but the streets felt eerily quiet. Life, understandably, felt like a movie that was placed on pause in March and forgotten about. 

Time had always felt like a stable concept, something dependable and easy to count on, but it no longer felt that way as days passed with seemingly no rhyme or reason. Four in the morning felt no different than four in the afternoon, Monday no different than Friday. If it weren’t for Calum’s weekly video chats with the boys - on Thursdays, of course, as Thursdays were for the boys -, you were afraid that you wouldn’t even know what day it was.

Before quarantine began, you’d been good about keeping your schedule written in a planner. Your work schedule was always there, right beside your class schedule, and your assignment due dates were even color-coded. It was helpful, a way to keep your hectic life in some sort of balance, and you’d managed to keep up with it for the first few weeks of quarantine. However, all of your organization flew out the window as the fatigue and discomfort of the situation really began to set in.

March and April had come and gone without so much as an indication of their passing and May’s arrival hit you much harder than you imagined it would.

Thankfully, your final semester of college was a light one. You’d planned it that way from the beginning, thanks to your advisor, and had ensured yourself a light course load that was supposed to leave you with time to job hunt and hang out with friends before everyone inevitably went their separate ways. You were grateful to your past self for that decision as you’d only had a few short Zoom meetings and a handful of easy assignments to submit in the month and a half between spring break and graduation.

If you were honest with yourself, graduation was something that you’d been looking forward to since August. It was a major achievement and you were excited to walk across the platform and gather the degree you’d busted your ass to earn. You and your friends had taken cliche photos in front of campus landmarks with a silly sign that read ‘Last First Day’ before classes began and had planned to make one that read ‘Now what?’ for after the ceremony. Your more artistic friends agreed to help decorate graduation caps, something you’d been looking forward to, and you’d even planned a Disney trip for the weekend before so that you could take photos in your cap and gown.

To make things even better, Calum had been able to book a later flight than the others so that he could stay in LA long enough for your graduation before heading out on tour with you by his side.

On paper, your plans were picture perfect. Everything felt like it was falling into place, like it was meant to be, and you were beyond excited. You were ready for something, anything, to celebrate the hard work you’d put in over the years - the late nights holed up in the library, studying and writing; the breakdowns over grades; the stress from trying your best to earn a degree.

But the universe had other plans.

You’d been the realistic one of your friends, cancelling plans and coming to terms with the fact that you most likely wouldn’t get a graduation the moment stay-at-home orders were announced, and spent the majority of your time trying to stay positive. There was nothing you could do to change what was happening and you knew that the cancellations were happening for the best.

Everyone was safer at home.

However, the positivity came at a price. Every time a negative emotion began to bubble, you swallowed it. Whenever you felt sad that you would no longer have late night dinners with friends after a rough class, whenever you felt disappointed that you had to cancel a road trip or a Disney trip, whenever you felt hurt that you wouldn’t get a graduation ceremony despite the hard work you put in to earn your degree, you bit them all back and reminded yourself that things could be worse.

You didn’t allow yourself to feel the emotions that were festering beneath the surface because they made you feel guilty. Feeling anything other than grateful for your health and comfort in the fact that you knew this situation wouldn’t make you or break you lodged an uncomfortable feeling in the pit of your stomach so you avoided those thoughts altogether.

However, as desperately as you avoided the negative thoughts for yourself, you were quick to comfort your loved ones and encourage them to experience their emotions fully. Calum, especially.

You knew that he was heartbroken - as were the others - that their plans for the album had had to change so drastically, so quickly. They’d all been so excited, so ready to release the album they’d put so much of themselves into, and things came to a grinding halt. You knew that they were devastated that the release of such a personal album had to be under such conditions. They couldn’t celebrate with the fans and, even worse, they couldn’t celebrate with one another.

Calum never complained but he did acknowledge his feelings. He talked openly, to you, about how disappointed he was that things were going the way they were even though he understood it all. He got it off his chest and moved on. You understood, he’d worked hard and deserved to have the album release they’d all been planning for. You told him as much in the days immediately surrounding the release, words of comfort leaving your lips as you ran your fingers through the blonde curls you were praying he kept.

And that was why he was completely and utterly baffled when he learned that you didn’t feel you deserved the same.

You’d never outright told him that you were upset about having to cancel your travel or that graduation was cancelled - in fact, you’d joked that you were glad because it meant you didn’t have to deal with crowds or packing - but he could tell just how much it was hurting you. You avoided bringing up those topics yourself and when you only offered enough words to move past them in a conversation, he learned to leave them alone. He could tell that you felt guilty for feeling sad and it broke his heart.

You’d worked so hard for graduation, for the things that were coming after, and to see you trying to pretend that it didn’t matter that they were cancelled worried him.

You were upset, more so than he realized, and he wanted to do something to make your nontraditional graduation a little easier on you. You’d been so kind and understanding when he was upset over the album release, when your friends were upset over their own cancelled plans, and to him, graduating college was an astounding accomplishment that deserved a celebration.

So, with the help of friends, he set out to make it a day that you would never forget.

Distracting you in order to set up for the impromptu graduation ceremony and party he was planning was much easier than he’d imagined it would be. You forgot that it was even supposed to be your graduation day - to be fair, you’d forgotten what day it was generally - until the calls from your family started rolling in.

You spent your morning on the phone, thanking relatives for their well wishes, but as everyone lamented the loss of a traditional ceremony on your behalf, he could tell that even though they meant well, the calls weren’t exactly helpful.

He knew that you didn’t want to talk about it, not yet,  and that you wanted to be alone so he encouraged you to go for a walk with Duke around the neighborhood. He sent you off with a kiss and he was glad to see that you felt better when you returned thirty minutes later. Your shoulders were lifted and your eyes were lighter as you watched Duke settle onto the couch for a nap after his adventure but your movements were still sluggish as you wandered around the house in search of something - anything - to entertain you.

In an effort to keep you out of the backyard for just a little longer, he guided you to the couch and encouraged you to take a nap with Duke, to cuddle up and watch television - binge something now that you were officially done with school and had time to properly enjoy it without the guilt of putting off schoolwork. It was easy, getting you to settle in, and he felt his heart break slightly as he watched you fight tears.

He took a little over an hour to finish decorating the backyard, each piece of his elaborate plan falling into place finally, before he returned to the living room. The first thing that Calum saw was you, curled up on the couch beneath a heavy blanket a friend had given you for Christmas, with Duke lying on your stomach and tears in your eyes as you watched a scene that would have pulled a few tears from you, already sad or not.

He bit back a laugh, both at your emotional investment in the show and at Duke’s annoyed huff as you made a noise at the scene, before he crossed the living room and kneeled down beside the couch. He waited a second, just until the credits began to roll, before pausing the television and nudging your shoulder.

“You okay, love?”

His words were soft, quiet in the still air of the living room, and he knew that the answer was no but, as expected, you nodded. “I’ve never seen this episode. All the good characters are leaving the show,” you answered, a pout on your lips as you shifted to glance at him.

He smiled, a barely there quirk of his lips, and shook his head before he stood from beside the couch and offered you his hand. “Come on, let’s get some fresh air. Give you time to process those feelings before you start another episode,” he teased, a grin on his lips as he watched you lift Duke and place him back onto the blanket as soon as you were out from under it.

“I don’t want to keep watching but I’m too invested in the story to stop now,” you mumbled, your voice muffled as you wrapped your arm around Calum’s and leaned into his side.

“You want me to hate watch it with you? I’ve been told my commentary’s excellent.”

“Your commentary is excellent, when it’s directed at the boys and not my television shows. Only I’m allowed to make fun of how bad it is. Deep down, I still love it,” you defended, a laugh leaving your lips as you followed Calum out into the backyard. He stopped, right by the door, and it took you a moment longer than it should have to notice. But when you finally lifted your head, confused as to why he’d paused before you made it to the swing, you were awed by what you saw.

The backyard had been transformed. Calum’s laptop sat on the table near the swing, a Zoom call open with the boys and family - both yours and his -, and beside it sat a box from your favorite bakery. There were balloons and string lights and shiny black and gold confetti littering the area and it brought tears to your eyes as you took in the amount of work Calum had done to give you some kind of celebration.

“It’s not the same, I know,” he began, gently tugging you closer to the setup, “but you deserve a celebration. You worked hard for your degree and I’m sorry you don’t get a traditional ceremony but we’re all really proud of you. Is this okay?”

It was hard to answer his question with the tears threatening to spill so you nodded and threw your arms around his neck in a tight hug. “Thank you,” you whispered, your voice low as you tried to fight your emotions, and Calum nodded his acknowledgement as he gave you a smile.

Although it wasn’t the traditional ceremony, far from it, the graduation that you got was one that you knew you’d never forget. Your families didn’t stay long, only long enough to watch Calum hand you a rolled up piece of paper with a wide grin and for you to toss your cap into the air after turning your tassel, but the boys and their respective girls - and Mali - stuck around after to celebrate.

“We’re all really proud of you,” Ashton commented, a smile on his lips as he watched the others nod their agreement. “You’ve worked really hard and this isn’t the party we wanted to throw you but it’ll have to do for now. It was really inspiring to watch you put your all into getting your degree and all of your hard work has paid off.  I’m excited to see what you do next because I know it’s going to be amazing. Congratulations!”

“When we’re allowed to see each other again, we’ll do something fun,” Michael agreed, “but for now, just know that we knew you’d get your degree and put us dropouts to shame.” Michael’s comment was teasing, he had a grin on his lips as he raised his drink in a toast, and Calum muttered a faux-offended ‘hey!’ by your side. “Seriously, we’re really proud of you and happy for you. Congratulations!”

“I don’t know what I can say that they haven’t already said,” Luke laughed, “but it’s worth repeating that this is an accomplishment and we’re really proud of you. You did it! You graduated college! I’m not going to ask what your plans are now because no one has any plans right now but I know that whatever you do next, you’ll do it just as well. Congratulations!”

You leaned into Calum’s side, a wide smile on your lips, as you watched them all toast to your graduation. It was surreal, celebrating such an event via video call, but you were grateful for your friends as they all shared stories and jokes with the goal of making you laugh in mind. You spent nearly two hours chatting with them, your mood lifting significantly, before it came time to end the call.

When the last person was gone, Calum turned to you and offered a sincere smile. “I hope that made missing graduation at least a little easier. I know it was hard on you but you achieved something amazing and I’m proud of you.”

“Thank you,” you repeated, your heart light for the first time in weeks. “I was really upset about having to miss the ceremony but I think this more than makes up for it. Except I’ll be really glad to get my actual diploma, not a-“ you paused, taking a quick glance at the paper Calum had used, “oh my god, Cal! Not an instruction booklet that came with your awful wifi router.”

“Hey, it was the only paper I could find,” he defended, laughing just as hard as you as he realized what he’d handed you in lieu of your diploma. “But I’m glad this was a suitable stand-in. Michael was joking but it really is impressive. I dropped out of high school and here you are, getting your degree. You never let anything get in the way of achieving your goal and I’m really proud of you for working so hard.”

“I love you, you know that?”

“I do,” Calum nodded, a soft smile on his lips as you leaned in closer to him, “and I love you, too. Congratulations, love.”

In the end, you never could’ve predicted your graduation would end up turning out this way but the love and support from your friends and family, and from Calum, made your nontraditional graduation one that you would never forget.

___________________________________________________

Author’s Note: Yesterday should’ve been my graduation day. I technically did receive my MA but there was no ceremony. Even though I’ve already experienced one college graduation, having to miss this one hit me really hard and I spent yesterday in a bit of a funk. But, as I said, I’ve already had one college graduation so I consider myself lucky. To the class of 2020 experiencing their first graduation, I’m really sorry things didn’t turn out the way you were expecting. Just know that everyone is incredibly proud of you and it’s okay to be sad that you didn’t get a ceremony. I hope this is at least a little comforting. This isn’t the best but my mental health has been on the decline, as has my writing. I, of course, don’t mean to make light of the situation. I understand why graduations were cancelled,  I really do. But I still felt a loss and know that I’m not alone. So, to the class of 2020, congratulations and good luck on your future endeavors. I believe in you!

Tag List (like this post or message me if you want to be added!) : @toolazymyguy , @irwinkitten , @jamieebabiee , @glittersluke , @spicycal , @lusbaby , @everyscarisahealingplace, @brokenvirtualheartcollector , @if-it-rains-it-pours, @blisshemmings , @calumscalm , @lovemenowseemenever , @ijustreallylovezebras , @rhiannonmichelle, @p0laroidpictures , @tomscuddles , @loverofmineluke , @harrytreatspeoplewithkindnesss , @blueviiolence , @loveroflrh , @empathycth , @luckyduckydoo , @tobefalling , @bandsandbooksaremykink , @watch-how-she-burns , @megz1985, @wokeupinaustralia , @lucidlrh , @canterburyfiction , @cal-is-not-on-branding , @t-i-n-y-d-i-n-o , @jaacknaano , @findingliam-o , @mindkaleidoscope​ , @idk-who-i-am-anymore1 , @sammyrenae68 , @flowerthug , @calumsphile , @caitdaniels, @drummerboy794 , @writingfortoomanyfandoms , @x-lover-of-mine-x , @miliefayy , @sunaaii , @canterburyfiction , @sebrox40 , @nati-nn , @opheliaaurora23 , @bitterbethany , @sunnysidesblog​ , @333-xx​ , @thesubtweeter​

[iimaginebts]

I can’t love you

+ Paring/ Fuck buddies!Jimin x reader 

+ Genre/  Fluff, angst, romance and smut 

+ Summary/ Jimin came home one night all drunk after a huge fight with his boyfriend,Yoongi. Unable to suppress his needs, he turned to you to have a one night stand which unfortunately turned into many nights. After agreeing on being fuck buddies with no feelings involved, you can’t help but start to grow feelings for Jimin. Would you confess to Jimin about your feelings or keep it to yourself as you try to shut him out of your mind?

Jimin pounded into you as you grabbed the headboard for support. This is the third time you are about to orgasm. “ J-Jimin p-please. “ 

“ What’s it babygirl? Use your words. “ Jimin replied, still pounding mercilessly into you. 

“ It’s starting to hurt Jimin, please let me cum, I’ll be a good girl I promise “ you breathed out.

“ Okay, let’s cum together, on the count of 3, 1... 2... 3! “ 

A wave of relief flooded through you as the hot liquid poured out of your body, onto Jimin’s huge cock. You watch as his cock twitch and spit out cum. You felt so tired but relief at the same time, you fall onto your bed, feeling the soft pillows beneath you. Jimin went out of your room and returned with a cloth as he wiped your cum and sweat. 

“ Are you going to Yoongi’s again? “ you ask while Jimin busy himself with the cloth, picking up his own shirt and heading to the toilet. 

“ Yes, he says he wants to Netflix and cuddle tonight. “ came the reply as you heard the sound of water splattering onto the floor. You sigh deeply. You miss waking up with Jimin by your side, the last time was probably when you were on your period and begged him to buy you some necessities while he was already half-way walking to Yoongi’s apartment. He ended up having to lie about how he forgot to complete some assignments that needed to be submitted by the next day. 

Jimin lives in the same dorm as you, your bedroom literally five steps away from his but that night with Jimin, you have been sleeping at his room most nights. He goes over to Yoongi’s apartment almost every night hence sleeping in his room doesn’t make a difference with yours. You’ve met Yoongi before, a few times when he came over to find Jimin when Jimin was too busy to go over. 

You and Jimin have been fuck buddies two months after he and Yoongi starting dating. It was when Jimin got drunk after a big fight with Yoongi, he had mistook you for Yoongi and drunkenly fucked you. Honestly, you didn’t know how he managed to do that especially after he strip you off your clothes, he didn’t look surprise to see a pussy instead of a dick. Or maybe he was too drunk. That’s what he told you. You’ve always had feelings for Jimin, since the first week of moving into the same apartment as him and seeing him shirtless for the first time when you were cooking pancakes, you didn’t realize how this mochi-looking guy could be so hot. Your heart fluttered when Jimin pulled you by your waist and kissed you that night, looking at you with his small moon-shaped lusty eyes, making you weak instantly. To your dismay, Yoongi turned up at your front door the next day and patch things back up with Jimin. You felt bad every time you see Yoongi, trying to avoid his gaze as much as possible. You even wanted to stop things between you and Jimin but he assured you that he will never let Yoongi find out and even if Yoongi does, Jimin will take all the blame. 

After the one night stand, Jimin felt himself unable to control his needs in-front of you. The way your hips move, the way your lips parted slightly whenever you’re sleeping and the way you call his name, his heart melts a little every time he looks at you. He didn’t know what he was feeling, he knows he love Yoongi too. Could he possibility like two person at the same time? It would be ridiculous right? Not wanting to lose either of you, he decide that being fuck buddies with you can help to keep you by his side while dating Yoongi. He knew that he was being selfish and unfair to both of you, but he couldn’t help it. He made sure you and Yoongi know none of this, he tried to suppress his feelings towards you by making sure he leaves right after fucking you to make it up to Yoongi. 

Jimin got out of the shower as the water ran the last piece of his thoughts into the drain. He got off the shower and dried himself then changed into fresh clothing. Walking into his room, he picked up his phone by the nightstand and texted Yoongi that he is going over. You watch as he picked up his bag and leave your room throwing a casual ‘bye’ over his shoulder before you hear the door close and keys rattle. 

You felt lonely instantly. Staying in bed, you picked up Jimin’s sweater at the end of the bed and threw it on, wanting to go to the kitchen to look for food. Bad idea. Your legs gave up as soon as you stood up, it felt so sore and tight all over, Jimin was being extra harsh these days, you could still see the slap mark on your thigh that Jimin gave you a few days ago. You picked up your phone and scroll through Instagram, liking every post you see on your feed. Your eyelids were growing heavy and before you knowing it, you were soon fast asleep. 

You woke up to the blaring sound of your phone, Jimin’s name flashing on your screen. Your thumb slide right as you put your phone to your ears “ Jimin it’s 10 A.M. , you know I don’t wake up until past noon. “ you groaned lazily. 

“ I know but Yoongi said he wants to go over at later so you gotta get out of my bed asap, don’t forget to take your clothes along! “ Jimin warned over the phone, his voice was a hushed-whisper. You sigh deeply, why of all time, now? Your whole body feels sore and heavy, you didn’t even want to get out of Jimin’s bed today. After hanging up, you stepped out of the warmth of Jimin’s bed and collect your panties and bra on the carpeted floor before heading back to your room. You slammed onto your bed the moment you reach it and dozed off again. 

By the time you woke up, it was already mid-noon and you heard some shuffling and whispers coming from the living room. You rolled out of your bed and walked out of your room as the shuffling noises became louder and louder. You should have known it. What were you expecting? 

You were greeted by the marvelous sight of Jimin passionately kissing Yoongi on the couch, their legs straddled together. You stunned at the sight before you, not knowing how to react. Yoongi, who was on top of Jimin, finally broke the kiss after what seemed like hours of kissing, panting, he seemed to realize your presence. 

“ Oh Y/n! Hey! “ he said, getting off Jimin, coming over to give you a warm hug, as if it’s the most normal thing to do. Sure, you’ve sen them kissed a few times, but he last time you saw it was before any of your feelings started to develop for Jimin, so now it’s different to see them kiss. You could smell Jimin’s scent on him as he hugged you. You almost wanted to push him back out of jealously but managed to control yourself.  You awkwardly hugged him back before glancing over at Jimin. His cheeks were a bright shade of pink as you notice the bulge in his sweatpants. You felt your eyes water as Yoongi pulled away. 

“ Whoa are you okay? Why are you crying ? “ Yoongi asked as he looked at you. You quickly wiped away your tears and smiled at him “ Oh it’s nothing. I just get teary eyes whenever I just woke up. “ You lied. Of course, Jimin would see right through your lie, but he didn’t say anything. After a few small talks, Yoongi went to the kitchen to get you some food that he brought from home. Just as you were about to leave to help Yoongi, Jimin held you back. You turn facing a pink-cheeked Jimin. 

Jimin pulled you closer to him as you see his eyes turn lusty. The obvious bulge is still there but you tried your very best to not look at it. He was about to say something when Yoongi suddenly emerged asking whether you want a glass of milk. Jimin immediately let go of your arm and scratched the back of his neck as you see his ears turn red. You were hurt at his actions but you remind yourself for the third time today that Yoongi and Jimin are the official couple here and you have no right to be jealous. You took a deep breath before walking over to Yoongi while shaking your head. 

================================================================

Hey, I’m not sure if I should make this a series, let me know if you guys liked it... Thank you for reading <3

Part. 2 

[hold-my-hand-kuroo]

tendou as my favorite naruto!! openings-

it’s midnight where i am right now, so a big hbd to one of my favorite nerds!!  here’s something quick and dumb that i did while i’m still functioning,,,this is what he would’ve wanted, i’m sure of it.

also before someone @’s me, i have more than four favorite naruto openings, but i just don’t have the time to write them all- (i am a “lovers” supremacist though).

pairing: tendou satori x reader

i. “We’ve pretended to forget the things we held dear, so we can just laugh and say it’s nothing.”

Tendou can’t say that quitting volleyball after high school was a bad idea. No longer does he have to ache throughout his legs and arms, and no longer does he have to practice inside a stuffy gym until the sun was gone. He can finally rest on the weekends or take time to work on assignments before midnight. It’s liberating and less stressful on his part. Plus, even if he slightly missed volleyball from time to time, he could just watch one of Ushijima’s games during his now-open weekends. For sure, Tendou can’t say that he regrets leaving the sport.

But he also can’t say that he doesn’t miss his paradise.

His favorite spot at university is the secluded spot in the back, hidden away from most students. It’s where you find him during long breaks in between classes or during lunch, and it’s where you sit under the shade of a tall tree, watching Tendou as he bounces the volleyball back and forth against the brick wall. The sound is soft, gentle, and steady, and it helps you concentrate on your work. Sometimes, after the long, grueling hours of an all-nighter, you find the noise to be lulling, almost hypnotic. It wasn’t hard for you to nod off.

Today is no exception. Procrastinating and leaving your final papers to the night before wasn’t your best idea, and after what seemed to be the strangest period of limbo, drifting between dozing off and waking up, you found yourself finally submitting and missing your entire night’s worth of sleep. You take your lunch break as an opportunity to finally get some rest, and when you round the corner, Tendou’s already there. He’s humming a tune, fingers pressing against the white ball. Hearing your footsteps, he turns and gives you a wide smile. Even then, he doesn’t stop tossing the ball.

“You look terrible,” he comments, stifling his laughter. You groan, settling against the wood of the tree but make no effort to respond. Tendou changes his song, picking a melody that is more calming while continuing to play. The gentle breeze sets you into a deep slumber with the redhead acting as your lullaby.

When you wake up, you find yourself leaning against his shoulder. Your eyes flutter open and then close almost immediately at the sudden intrusion of sunlight. Tendou chuckles from beside you, placing his hand over your closed lids and whistling to himself. Feeling around for his other hand, you trace your fingertips over his own, lingering touches dancing on his skin. You can tell that he’s in a good mood based on the song he’s humming. It was either that or the kiss he places on your cheek after letting you open your eyes.

“Satori?” you murmur, voice still tinged with drowsiness. He pauses his singing, signaling you to finish your thought. “Why aren’t you in the volleyball club?”

“Babe, are you getting sick of me? Or do you just hate me?” he laughs. “I’d run out of time to breathe, let alone see you on the regular.”

“You don’t miss it?”

“Are you really asking me if I miss being bruised all over and struggling to meet deadlines?” He laughs again and pokes your face with a teasing glint in his eye. “Y/N, I’m hurt!”

“You seem to like it a lot considering that you’re literally playing on your own every day.” You put extra emphasis on the last two words and give him a knowing look. Tendou just shakes his head.

“Nah. I only played in high school because joining a club was required. I don’t really care about it now.” His response is simple, less wordy than his usual elaborations, so you let the topic rest. Closing your eyes again, you take part in the humming. The melodies, completely different, clash like day and night, and it makes both of you laugh.

Tendou watches as you fall back to sleep, eyes filled with fondness. In truth, maybe Tendou misses his volleyball club a little bit. His paradise. Not the sport itself per se, but the people around him. It was hard finding classmates that didn’t find him utterly repulsive, so he wasn’t surprised that he fit well into a team that was filled with nothing but the most eccentric people he has ever met. Ushijima and his love affair with volleyball and Semi with his drive to risk it all were standouts, but he supposes that there were others too. Yeah, he misses them more than he’d like to admit, and he misses spending all his waking hours with them. Just a little.

“You stopped humming.” It’s more of a comment on your part rather a complaint, but you can tell by his jolt that you had unintentionally snapped him out of his deep thoughts. “There’s nothing wrong with missing high school, you know?”

“No, it’s okay.” He lies through his teeth, and you’re aware, but you decide to stay quiet.

ii. “I will never let go of your hand. Tell me what is on your mind.”

Tendou works hard because he knows he’s not enough. Because he feels undeserving.

When you waltzed into his life, he hardly had any time to prepare. It’s the first time someone has ever liked him back, and he’s still surprised to this day. Tendou’s not sure which qualities exactly that have caught your interest, but he’s almost 100% sure that your taste is terrible. There isn’t a day that goes by where he doesn’t think that the person holding your hand on the street could be someone so much more attractive, so much more appealing. Someone who didn’t make kids hide whenever they saw him or someone who could embrace you and say with full confidence that you deserved each other. You don’t need someone that constantly makes you worry. You definitely don’t need a guy like him.

He knows your entire schedule and pays special attention to your free periods so that he can visit you. His head is now space for him to keep notes on every little thing about you from your pet peeves to your favorite snacks. It’s counterintuitive for sure, thinking that he’s not worth your time but also desperately trying to keep a hold of you. It’s paradoxical, he knows, but he’s stuck in a limbo of wishing you the very best while also craving your touch and affection at any moment given in time. It’s selfish, and he finds himself wondering if the title of ‘Monster’ is fitting after all.

“Are you sure you’re okay like this?” he asks nervously one Saturday with you sitting by his side. You look at him curiously, setting your book down.

“What do you mean?” His eyes become shifty, looking away.

“I mean, aren’t you bored just reading manga at my house?” he asks, chuckling nervously. “We could go to that restaurant you wanted to go to instead-“

“We’re always doing the things I want though, Satori,” you whine. “That’s why today’s date is something you like. You’ve been wanting to catch up with this series for a while now, right?”

“Yeah, but-,” he tries to protest, frowning, but you just shake your head, silencing him. You don’t know much about the series, but you whenever you see Tendou’s eyes glitter at something particularly cool that his favorite characters did, your heart becomes warm. It’s incredibly endearing, and you definitely want to spend all day just watching him pursue his interests instead of fussing over you. You want to know more about his hobbies, his likes, and dislikes, but he’s oddly reserved about those topics.

“Which character is your favorite?” You ask in hopes of having Tendou open up and maybe give you a passionate rant, a sight you’ve been wanting to see for a while now. Nudging at his lanky arm, you crawl under, placing yourself in his lap. He immediately sets the volume down and pulls you into a tight embrace, balancing his chin on top of your head. You’re not upset about it, but you’re just a little disappointed. You were hoping that he’d keep reading.

“Do you know any of the characters?” he responds teasingly. You shake your head and pick up the book. “I can start from the beginning if you want-“

“No, no, no! Keep reading.” You’re urging him to continue, practically holding the pages over your head so that he can see them. Tendou laughs, shifts his chin to your shoulder, and complies, taking hold of the book once again. You’re not sure if he’s actually paying attention to the storyline since he keeps peppering you with kisses every few pages or so, but this is a good start. “What’s going on?”

“Curious, are we?” He clears his throat and points to one of the characters. “You see this guy over here? He’s the villain. My favorite, since you asked.”

“Is he…your type?”

“You’re my type,” Tendou coos, stifling another fit of laughter. He continues describing the plot, however, going through what has developed since volume one, each pivotal character, his favorite moments, and unbelievably deep analysis on symbols and events. He’s usually a chatty person, but you’ve never seen him rave over something so personal to who he is as a person. It wasn’t like when he would talk endlessly about something funny that happened or something he saw. Rather, his glow and animated gestures, his sense of comfort, and his lack of restraint keep you mesmerized, and it’s then that you realize that Tendou rarely talks about his hobbies in front of you. You wish he would.

“This is nice,” you murmur, returning a kiss onto his cheek. He immediately stiffens, and you’re a little bit startled. “What’s wrong?”

“Sorry for rambling,” he says rather on edge. He quickly closes the manga, arms returning to wrap around your body. “It was boring listening to me just talk about-“

“I thought it was cute though.” You sigh and turn around to face him. Pressing your nose to his, your lips are just barely a few millimeters apart from his. “I could listen to you talk about this all day, Satori.”

Tendou’s not sure if it’s the kiss that you press on his lips that intoxicates him or if it’s the fact that you smell like his shampoo, but for a moment, he feels himself wondering if it’d be okay to let you in onto his hobbies, his likes, his dislikes, and everything that he tries so hard to keep from you in fear of driving you away. Just for a second, he thinks that maybe, just maybe, it’d be fine for him to open up.

iii. “You cried just now like a sobbing child. Even if the future becomes invisible, I will protect you.”

An angel. That’s what Tendou thinks you are when you let him rest his head on your chest and wrap your arms around his shoulders, pulling him even closer into your comforting warmth. He’s calmed by the gentle rise and fall of your breathing and the soft beating of your heart. The way your fingers rake through his hair, the way your humming fills the emptiness, you’re his safe haven, his sanctuary. His new paradise. He likes how you just seem to know what’s wrong, because he hates to complain, especially to you. He would much rather prefer making you laugh with a funny joke or story, but for now, he lets you play with his hair and caress his back.

You’re humming the song that he often sings for you when you’re feeling down. While you’re not exactly the perfect vocalist, straining at some high parts, you wonder if it helps Tendou at all, even if minimally. He cries quietly, and you wonder if it’s because he’s spent years being sad alone. The thought pains your heart, so instead, you take his palm and place it against your lips, quietly whispering praise. Things about him being more than enough and things that you wonder if he’d laugh at, you pour your sincerity into it all. You know he’ll tell you when he’s ready, so you find a way to pass the time.

“Let’s take a bath, Satori,” you mumble into his hair, waiting to see if he’s willing to get off of you. His movement is slow, reluctant, but you do feel him nodding, getting off of you with his head hung low. He doesn’t mean to be so down, so annoying, and he doesn’t hold it against you if you get irritated. But you don’t, and he feels like he’s the luckiest man in the world. “I’ll wash your hair for you. Come on.”

He holds your hand all the way to the bathroom, refusing to lose contact from the warmth of your skin. Even when the two of you are getting undressed, he’s quickly back to leaning into you in the tub. It’s a little bit difficult since his limbs are so long and lanky, but with a bit of curling up on Tendou’s part, you make enough space for yourself. He practically sinks into your fingers rubbing through his scalp, and you see his shoulders begin to lose their tension. You hum, satisfied, and work the soap around his body, helping him wash up. The smile that spreads across your face when he starts humming back is wide. You feel a little bit dumb, but you’re just so relieved that Tendou’s energy is finally back. The giggles that spill from your lips as he splashes about practically pour out from your pretty lips that Tendou wants to kiss so, so badly, but he decides to wait for a more comfortable position.

He hates to admit it, but he loves the feeling of being pampered. Granted, he was always more of a giver, but he supposes that being on the receiving side of things isn’t as bad as he initially thought, especially when you take the towel to rub against his hair and sit him down on the couch with hairdryer in hand.

“My hair is gonna get all puffy if you use that,” is the first complete sentence that leaves his mouth after returning home that night. He lacks his usual energy, but you don’t blame him. Rather, his soft chuckle sends your own spirits flying. “I’ll look ridiculous.”

“Really?” you muse, plugging in the device despite his protests. “I think you’ll be cute, all fluffy and stuff.”

“Why don’t you get a pet or something instead then?”

“Wouldn’t you get jealous if I paid too much attention to a cat over you?”

He pretends to think hard, then nods his head rapidly. You giggle again, maneuvering the hairdryer around his head. The machine is a little loud, but you can hear Tendou back to his usual humming, moving his body around ever so slightly just to make your task a lot harder than it was supposed to be. You watch as he swings left and then right with a certain mischievousness about him, twiddling with his fingers and then casually flipping on the television to his favorite channel. You’re not sure if he actually likes the show that’s being broadcasted or just the BGM, as he never really watched it and would much rather prefer to listen to the audio only while doing something else.

“Babe, can this be our song,” he jokes before going back to sing the opening lyrics to the children’s show.

“Satori, I don’t even know this show,” you reply, trying to sound exasperated as possible. He knows you’re pretending though and raises a curious brow. Then, he breaks into a grin. “I don’t have a good feeling about this-“

“What do you want to watch then?” His question is abrupt, but his eyes glint impishly. You’d be nervous if you weren’t overjoyed at his newly regained energy. “You sound like you want to do something else.”

“You’ll catch a cold,” you try to scold, but he pays no head, grabbing the hairdryer out of your hand and shutting it off. He tugs at the chord gently, unplugging it all together, and reaches for your waist. He places you securely on your lap. You can only stammer short retorts that are muffled by the energetic kisses he places all over your face. He relishes in every giggle and every squeal that escapes your mouth. Even the ways your eyes crinkle when you’re smiling makes his heart go insane. Suddenly, he stops to rest his forehead against yours. Your gaze almost absorbs him completely, but he doesn’t have qualms about that part.

“What’s wrong, Satori?” you ask, barely above a whisper.

He takes a deep breath. “Do you…mind if I vent a little?”

“You know you never have to ask for permission about that, right?” You kiss him on each of his eyes, each a little bit puffy, and then on his cheek. “I’m all ears.”

iv. “So keep trying to break free to that blue, blue sky.”

It’s always a fun, albeit loud, time when Tendou invites his old Shiratorizawa friends over for his reunion parties. You don’t mind at all, of course, considering that you were the one who encouraged this gathering in the first place. To be honest, you’re a little bit curious about how he acts around his closest friends that he talks so much about. You even wonder if a man like Ushijima Wakatoshi, the one you only see on TV or in interviews, is actually as funny as Tendou makes him out to be. In other words, you expect your home to be loud, but what you didn’t expect was that it’d be loud over you.

“Guys, Y/N’s super-duper gorgeous, right?” he asks for what seemed like the thousandth time that night. He’s set on making Ushijima give in to the fact that you’re the most beautiful person in the entire universe, but you wonder how many times you have to witness the professional’s utter silence at the question before Tendou would give up. “Toshi, you should just give it up already and say it!”

“I haven’t seen every single person in this universe, so I can’t answer,” his friend answers, brushing him off. Shirabu snorts from Ushijima’s side.

“Boo,” Tendou whines, kissing your face. From the corner of your eye, you catching Goshiki gagging. “Can’t you be a little bit more excited over the love of my life?”

“We are excited.” Semi chuckles, whacking Tendou a few times on the back to which the red-head responds with feigned pain. “But we know you’ll start sulking if we go overboard with the compliments.”

“I do not sulk that easily!” Tendou huffs, chest puffed out, and slaps Semi back. He only laughs. “I can’t believe I’m being bullied by a guy with no sense of style at all!”

“I asked you about this jacket before I bought it, and you told me it was fine!”

“You shouldn’t have asked him at all.” Shirabu smirks from across the table, arms crossed. “I bet this smart ass thought it was Y/N texting him instead of you, Semi.”

“You didn’t have to do him like that,” Kawanishi mumbles from beside the former setter. Still, that doesn’t wipe away the smirks they’re both wearing, and Tendou can only chuckle sheepishly.

“Well, what am I supposed to when Y/N looks good in anything?” Tendou sighs. His exasperation and added theatrical flair make you giggle even though you’re slightly embarrassed that he’s showing off to everyone from his old team. “Semi Semi, if it was Y/N wearing that jacket, it’d look great. You? Not so much.”

“That’s the most roundabout way of insulting me.” Shirabu and Kawanishi snicker quietly, earning a glare from Semi that goes ignored. “I suddenly remember why all the underclassmen thought you were such a hassle, Tendou.”

You turn to him in fascination. It wasn’t a surprise to you that he liked to tease and poke fun of other people, but you never thought that he was a bully. You initially had imagined Tendou to be a well-respected senior based on his reputation as a middle-blocker. Never in a million years did you think that it was the exact opposite.

“Goshiki, is that true?” you turn to ask, and the younger man nods emphatically. He’s agreeing with Semi so much that his nods make his hair fly all over the place, earning a loud laugh from Tendou.

“Y/N, Tendou was the absolute worst,” Goshiki answers, setting down his drink so forcefully that it almost spills. “He’d always ignore us when we did something good, but then he’d compliment us for absolutely nothing. It messed me up so much that instead of expecting him to cheer for landing a really good serve, I waited for praise for turning off the lights or something. Tendou was awful.”

“That was probably you being dumb, but I do agree that Tendou was never quiet during practice.” Shirabu grimaces, but you’re not sure if it’s because he just remembered something particularly annoying or if it’s because he’s agreeing with Goshiki. “I never want to go back.”

“I remember one time, he thought it’d be funny to salt the water,” Kawanishi mutters and the entire table breaks into a loud groan. “Yeah, I think I have to agree with you guys. Tendou was a handful.”

From beside you, you hear Tendou tsking and catching him wagging a disapproving finger. “Guys, you can’t insult Y/N like that! I’m gonna beat you guys up if you keep going on.”

“Dude, we get it.” Semi punches him once on the arm and then another time for good measure. “You’re married. You’ve told us a million times.”

“There’s that and the fact that we were, you know, at the wedding,” Shirabu sighs.

“Congratulations.” Ushijima’s comment is a little out of place, especially since the ceremony was already a month ago, and he had been one of the first people that Tendou told, but you only smile and thank him again. “It was an honor to be the best man.”

“Toshi, you don’t have to be so formal, you know?” Tendou grins, resting his chin on his hand. From underneath the table, you feel his other hand reach for yours, running his digits over the silver band sitting on your ring finger. “But really, I’m just reminding you guys that Y/N and I are married. I wouldn’t be surprised if you forgot since you’re all always so busy.”

“Oh, what would I give to forget you?” Shirabu sighs, earning another chuckle from Kawanishi and even Semi.

You laugh at the playful banter between Tendou and his friends. You squeeze his hand gently, and even while he’s participating in a heated debate with Semi over the gray-haired man’s best album, your husband makes sure to return your squeeze. In full truth, Tendou’s still aware of every little thing that you do. It’s one of the many things that have stayed the same over the years. He still sings, and he still likes to mess up your hair, but most importantly, he makes it a point to keep remembering everything about you. Tendou’s aware that something in him has changed, so he reasons that maybe you had your little changes too. And he’d remember all of them.

“Hey, spill the tea, Y/N,” Semi jokes. “Doesn’t Tendou make for a terrible husband?”

“Yeah right,” Tendou scoffs. His grin doesn’t falter and only widens when you shake your head at Semi. “That’s absolutely correct! I’m the best husband ever."

[finalexit]

07/31/21 (prose)

I wonder, is there anything sadder than knowing that home exists and that, for whatever reason, you are not there within its comforting embrace? Yes, that’s homesickness, a very simple despair that we are all familiar with.

But here’s what no one ever tells you about being homesick: once the feeling comes into your life, it never goes away. You spend time -- months, years, an entire lifetime -- trying, in earnest, to forget the way homesickness, that simple act of wanting, somehow empties you out. The way that absence fills that empty space like water in a bottle. It effortlessly reaches every crevice, unthinkingly molds itself to your unique ridges, and it makes its home in you. For good.

And now that you know this, now that I’ve told you, what will you do? Are you searching, now, trying to locate every last drop of that longing? To drain it out of you, to watch it evaporate at your feet, to be free of what you know, as well as I do, still resides somewhere inside of you? Maybe everywhere inside of you?

You can keep looking, but it has already reached the deepest parts of you, places you could only dream of reaching.

Hey, did you know that our cells are constantly dying and being replaced? Every cell that performs its duty to the bitter end gets replaced with that homesickness, and, sadly for you, and for me, and for everyone who has had this curse bestowed upon them, homesickness isn’t like a cell. It does not die once it has served its purpose. It does not get replaced by anything else. It is the one that replaces, and the more it replaces, the more you will find that you’re more of a yearning than you are a human.

Yearning is too big, it asks for too much, and there is no room for us in the equation. The only thing we can do is submit to it.

I learned of homesickness on a trip away from home. Not my first trip, but my first trip since I had become able to retain memories. I was young. And I was inconsolable because I knew that, while my soul had the capacity of being in two places at once, both at home and in this new, exciting place that was someone else’s home, my body could only be in one. And it was not in the place that I needed it to be.

But a child does not think like that, in so many words, so what I thought was: I miss Mommy. In an effort to console me, my brother called my mother and handed me the phone. We talked about various things, and I marveled (in awe and horror) at our distance. I wondered what my mother was seeing. Was she seeing the moon, while I was still watching the sunset? Or worse -- was she watching the sun rise, seeing a sight completely opposite to mine? These were all absurd questions, I realize now, as we were still in the same timezone and therefore were seeing very similar sights.

___

I know it would only make sense to finish that story. To perhaps divulge more of the trip. To talk about what it was like to arrive back home. But that story, the story of arriving back at home, is not nearly as important as the time that I didn’t.

And, anyway, I did not come here to tell you a story. What started as a simple question has evolved into this amalgamation of half-formed broken narratives. I hope you forgive me this crudity, and I hope you allow me to continue on in spite of it.

By the time I had my next major trip away from home, I was almost a legal adult. Though I perhaps seemed much the same to my mother and brothers, I had greatly changed in the years that had taken place between those two trips. I had held something in childhood, some purity or perhaps some tenacity, that I hadn’t retained as I aged. Perhaps even something as seemingly minor as that had made all the difference.

The vacation itself was a slurry of highs and lows, with the highs being fairly pleasant and the lows being devastating, paralyzing in their newness. Yes, I missed home -- there was nothing new or particularly surprising about that reality. But, this time, I had this deep-seated sense, a knowing, that I would never make it back home.

At the time, I took this feeling very literally. I would die, perhaps by purposeful violence or by some senseless accident, and my last moments would be spent in a place that didn’t look all that different from home but still wasn’t home. The sun had already set at home, but it was still bright where I was. This small difference was only natural, and I’m sure that even if that hadn’t been the case, I still would’ve taken issue with being somewhere foreign, but the fact remained that I wasn’t seeing the same sky as the one I was supposed to be seeing.

And the idea of my body dying somewhere that was still bright when it was supposed to be growing dark was just too much for me.

The anticlimactic ending to this “story,” (that I’m ending with some amount of haste because I know you do not really want to hear this story), though, is that I did go back home. I got off the plane, I met with my mother, she brought me home, and we quickly returned to the daily rhythm of our lives.

But I wasn’t wrong in my prediction that I would never return home. The me who came back was not the me who left on that trip, nor were they the me who had wanted more than anything to return. I felt them inside of me somewhere, still wishing to get back home, but they would not -- or perhaps simply could not -- recognize that we’re already home. The me that came back, the me who I still am now, tried and tried and still tries to speak to that version of me that wishes to return home. To console that me, to reassure that me that home still exists, and it can still be reached, and you have already reached it, it’s okay.

In that version of me, I also see the the version of me who had made that first journey, the one who had made it home. I see the version of me that learned what homesickness was, who allowed it to lie in wait within us like a sleeper agent until it could fulfill its own duty of wreaking havoc within me. All it needed was for me to leave home one more time, and then it did what it was assigned to do: Replace.

I see that trip as a turning point of my life, the point wherein my fate was sealed: I would cease to be human, and I would instead only be yearning. I tell this story to you, now, because I still find myself surprised at how much of me has disappeared, how much my own wanting has taken and taken and taken from me. At how much my own wanting can take without ever being satiated. At how my own wanting will continue to take, and it will only ever grow stronger, and it will only ever take more.

I asked you, earlier, if there was anything sadder than knowing that home exists and yet not being there in it. You didn’t have an answer, so I’ll provide one now. The thing that hurts more, much much more, is the knowing that home exists and that you will never be able to reach it again.

[bottomlouisficfest]

The first half of the Bottom Louis Fic Fest is complete! We posted 21 fics in the first month and we know it was a lot to keep up with, so we wanted to compile them all so you can make sure you’ve read every single one of these incredible fics. Please give all of these fics a chance and be sure to give the authors kudos, reblogs, retweets, and comments so they know how appreciated they are. And look out for even more amazing fics coming up!

Note: You can find the part 2 masterpost of the 2019 BLFF fics here.

Now That This Old World Is Ending

A fic by daggerinrose on AO3 | @thetommmo on Tumblr | @real_thetommmo on Twitter

49k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Needing a good distraction from his broken heart, Louis Tomlinson goes on a camping trip with his friends to Northern England. However, a different kind of distraction arises when his friends disappear from their camp. Hellbent on finding them, Louis soon discovers that the area has been taken over by a cult and teams up with a resentful archer with fire in his eyes and blood on his hands.

Far Cry inspired AU.

Listen To Your Heart

A fic by lovelarry10 on AO3 | @chloehl10 on Tumblr | @oneolddirection on Twitter

35k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post  | Twitter post

Louis has always been comfortable being Harry’s one and only. When Harry starts to branch out, Louis has a hard time letting him go.

Harry is very lucky to have someone who listens to what he has to say, despite the fact that he’s deaf. He’s finally feeling like he’s coming into himself, but Louis seems bothered by his newfound confidence.

You'll Find Me (in the region of the summer stars)

A fic by sweetmelodrama on AO3 | @peakmelodrama on Tumblr | @peakmelodrama on Twitter

50k | Mature | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Niall had never been exactly perfect at choosing young boys to become the next hero of Olympus, but there was just something in Harry that told Niall that this boy was going to be changing things around Mt. Olympus forever.

Or the one where they're all greek gods except for Harry, who thanks to Niall has to defeat everything from sirens to giants to dragons in order to survive. What Harry doesn't know is what could be waiting for him at the end of his quest -anything from nymphs to dryads... or even a certain soulmate omega.

the world is vast

A fic by Harryskiwiposes on AO3 | @hadtobelou on Tumblr

26k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

“I hate this. I fucking hate this so fucking much.” Harry began to cry. “She was only 17 for fuck’s sake. She had her whole life ahead of her! She should be researching colleges and skipping school to hang out at the mall. She should be playing with her little brothers and helping her mother in the kitchen with dinner. This is bullshit! Complete bullshit! I thought I could do this, I thought…”

He didn’t finish his sentence. Instead he kicked the brick wall before collapsing against it, his head back, rain beating against his face, mixing with his tears.

They stood in silence for a few moments before Harry looked to Louis. He saw the same sadness and sorrow as the night before. He felt the same connection, the same feeling that he and Louis were alike - both broken looking to belong.

Or - The Killing Au

Pour Decisions

A fic by hazzahtomlinson on AO3 | @watermelonwalls on Tumblr

12k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Prompt 80: AU where drunk!Louis fills out a fake job application for hot boss Harry Styles, including lurid details about his ‘desired position’ and ‘qualifications,’ and accidentally submits that instead of the real one.

Bloom

A fic by bitter_leaf on AO3 | @bitter-leaf on Tumblr

24k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Harry tucks the flower into the top pocket of Louis’ jacket, patting over his heart just once.

“What is it?” Louis asks, eyeing the sunny little yellow flower, a bit like a buttercup, “It’s lovely.”

Harry pushes a piece of hair behind his ear and smiles, “It’s a primrose. I got them in this morning, reminded me of you.”

When they first meet at Harry’s flower truck, Harry falls hard but Louis’ unavailable. Only before long, Harry reignites a spark that Louis thought long forgotten.

sweeter still when we're alone

A fic by louisjewels on AO3 | @louizsv on Tumblr | @perfecltnow on Twitter

20k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Louis is looking up at him, eyes glazed over and fucked out. His hair is a mess and Harry truly feels like he’s fallen under Louis’ spell.

“That’s right, you little witch,” he groans. He grabs the back of Louis’ hair and pulls it so that his head is tilted so far back that they’re barely centimetres apart, breathing in the same air. Harry closes his eyes and moves closer.

Nobody ever tells you that love potions taste like cherries.

Ours are the moments I play in the dark

A fic by edensrose on AO3 | @holdingthornsandroses on Tumblr | @thetrashpigeon on Twitter

30k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Jane Austen's Persuasion AU. Nine years ago Louis Tomlinson was persuaded to break off his engagement to Harry Styles, a poor sailor. Since then Louis has come to regret being so easily convinced to give up his one chance of happiness. Now Louis' family is in debt and his childhood home is being sold. In a complete reversal of fortune, Harry has returned to England a wealthy bachelor looking to settle down. Events conspire to bring them together once more though Louis is- must surely be- the last man on earth that Captain Styles would think of now.

Warming Up To You

A fic by youreyesonlarry on AO3 | @youreyesonlarry on Tumblr | @youreyesonlarry on Twitter

56k | Mature | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

“I feel you,” Harry nods along as he zips his bag open, carefully pulling out his fancy looking camera before pressing a button to turn it on. “I love taking pictures for a number of reasons, but I think the best part of the whole thing is that I’m able to go through my older pictures and have all these memories from those moments come back to me.”

He puts the camera against his eye and points at Louis, and before the shorter one can even react, he hears a ‘click’, and Harry’s smiling down at the screen of his camera.

“And I don't think I want to forget about the day I got stranded in a cabin with a pretty stranger,” he finishes off.

The Time is Now for Me and You

A fic by grimouis on AO3 | @ratherhear on Tumblr | @grimouis on Twitter

9k | Explicit | Louis/Liam | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Louis inhales shakily and then buries his face into the crook of Liam’s neck and cries. Liam just holds him close, keeping his hand moving lightly along Louis’ spine to let him know that he’s here and that he will be alright, despite Liam not knowing what’s going on.

It doesn’t take longer than a few minutes of crying before Louis extracts himself from Liam’s embrace, seemingly having collected himself enough to not break down again.

“Do you wanna tell me what all this is about?” Liam asks gently, keeping a gentle hand on Louis’ arm.

“We broke up.”

or; Liam is a weenie and Louis is a mess.

Ready To Fall

A fic by whoknows on AO3 | @crazyupsetter on Tumblr

21k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

“Ninety and rising,” Nick says triumphantly, as though making Harry’s heartbeat pick up by thrusting an obscenely attractive person in front of his face is any kind of success. “Louis Tomlinson has just walked into our control room and suddenly our dear Harry Styles has lost all ability to speak. Could this be some kind of strange coincidence?”

“I hate you,” Harry hisses, forcing his eyes back into Nick’s direction, uncaring that the mic must have picked it up. “I thought we agreed that you were going to play fair.”

“I’m sure I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Nick denies, except he’s holding up a picture of Louis’ face now, sharp cheekbones prominent, soft lashes nearly sweeping against his cheeks as he looks down, and his fucking mouth –

“A hundred and two!” Nick crows, all but clapping his hands together in glee. “The highest it’s ever been!”

“To be fair, I did bend over the desk on purpose,” Louis’ voice comes crackling in the headphones. Harry practically breaks his neck whipping his head around at the sound of it, gaping at him through the glass panel. “You can’t really blame him for getting a little excited about that, can you?”

Just a Little Taste

A fic by amomentoflove on AO3 | @daggerandrose​ on Tumblr | @dagger_rosefics on Twitter

13k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Louis works at The Blind Bat as a bartender during one of the busier times of the night. Typically, there’s one bartender on duty, his best mate Niall Horan, but Louis steps in to help with the demand. There’s always someone who needs a drink, a menu, or something to replenish their energy. He also has to look out of the humans who willingly allow vampires to feed on them. He’s quite protective of the regulars who come to get their kicks with a quick drink and a bite. A vampire’s bite, and the rush of endorphins that come with it, can be addicting. He should know.

Should Be, Meant To Be

A fic by thecheshirepussycat on AO3 | @the-cheshire-pussy-cat on Tumblr

9k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Prompt #65: Louis signs up for a Sugar Daddy dating website on a drunken dare. He forgets for a while, until one night he gets a notification for a message request from none other than his really hot (really rich) boss, Harry Styles.

Don’t Call Me Angel

A fic by larryent on AO3 | @larryent on Tumblr | @benicegivelove on Twitter

16k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Manhattan is a dangerous playground for the rich and entitled Alphas of New York. Those same wealthy Alphas are robbed after spending one night in the presence of a blue-eyed Omega and Officer Styles is assigned to the case.

Absolutely Smitten

A fic by MyEnglishRose on AO3 | @lwtisloved on Tumblr | @darlinlou on Twitter

20k | Mature | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Adopting Clifford was a way for Louis to finally cope with his loneliness, as a lively dog would spice up his life and his boring daily routine. Now, he surely didn’t expect Clifford to lead him to meet one strange man obsessed with his cat that he walks and cooks with.

Somehow, Louis falls in love pretty fast along the way.

Or. Louis is walking his dog. Harry is walking his cat. Leashes get tangled, and feelings too.

Somebody Gets Hurt

A fic by LashtonTommo on AO3 | bottom_tommo on Twitter

6k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Louis Tomlinson and Harry Styles have been romantically linked for years. The couple threaten their careers after trying to amuse themselves on a slow day.

By the Still of Your Hand

A fic by summerwine on AO3 | @smrwine on Tumblr | @SMRWINE on Twitter

10k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Louis has a little insecurity, Harry makes him feel better about it.

written in the stars (that's you and me)

A fic by fackinglouis on AO3 | @fackinglouis on Tumblr

22k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Louis pushes himself up on one elbow and stretches enough to just barely trace his fingertips over Harry’s jawline. Harry’s eyes drop to track his movements as he does it again. “D’you feel that?” he whispers.

To him, it feels like all of the universe’s magic lives just beneath his skin when he touches Harry with intent. It feels like something special. Louis watches Harry’s lips part and wants to touch that too. He almost does, but then Harry shakes his head. “Feel what?”

Written for the prompt: Louis is a funny and bratty psychic and Harry is set on proving he's a scam.

thinking about the t-shirt you sleep in

A fic by nonsensedarling on AO3 | @absoloutenonsense on Tumblr

52k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Harry's alpha fraternity donates to a local thrift shop (because of Liam's latent crush on a cute beta in his lecture). Louis' financial situation  (and confusing omega instincts) lead him to make some interesting fashion purchases. Lots of pizza, feelings, and not-really-lying.

Paint me a Literature of Love

A fic by bottomlouiswriter on AO3 | @xoxo-hl on Tumblr

18k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Harry loves literature. It also just so happens he falls in love with a painter who is the perfect subject for prose and poetry.

Louis loves art, specifically acrylic. It seems perfectly fitting that he finds a man that inspires him to paint with all the colours in his supply.

Or - The 90's au with art teacher Louis and literature teacher Harry.

building me up (but buttercup, you lied)

A fic by sakturen on AO3 | @softhie on Tumblr | @28pxls on Twitter

31k | Explicit | Louis/Harry | Tumblr post | Twitter post

Harry’s mouth felt dry just saying those words. What he had with Louis was so much more than a simple ‘fuck buddies’ situation. It was slow kisses in the morning between soft sheets and shy smiles, it was holding hands in the afternoon while walking and eating ice cream. It was breakfast for dinner, laughing and licking honey from each other’s lips as they shared goals and even some secrets, it was happiness, it was glow.

To Harry, what he had with Louis meant everything. Until Louis decided it meant nothing.