#i will beat this storyline into SUBMISSION i will beat it to DEATH i will FORCE IT TO MAKE SENSE

[svtskneecaps]

friends and fiends if this truly spells the Over for the qsmp i may let the brainworms that have been festering in me for MONTHS--A YEAR, EVEN--win.

i may summarize the goddamn fucking lore.

[itsdappleagain]

BARK BARK ITS FINALLY TIME FOR THE STOCKHOLM SYNDROME CAPER

not giving up on my trademark of being late for csweekly even though i vowed i wouldn't be late on this one. i have an excuse. i was doing audition prep/submission for a musical

OKAY ANYWAY

i think if i ever actually visited the belltower i would take damage just from being in the space

notes under the cut as always!

OKAY starting thoughts. this is. literally my favorite episode in the entire show. my favorite. im so fucking stoked you don't even know i love watching my blorbos get beat up. me 🤝rueitae

anyways. biting this episode and shaking it violently

i like that the faculty tie actually makes sense and they have solid motivations. it isnt just a plot device for a tie

love this shiot/angle of bellum btw so behold her. she is so amazing

okay hi. immediately stopping to go on a rant about the atmosphere in this caper. its. fucking. incredible. the scenery is so perfect. the right balance of beautiful and desolate, and it changes as the mood does. i could do this later but i will do it now because idk i want to its my post

notice as the episode goes on how as the tone gets darker in carmen's plotline, the scenery and mood around her gets colder and literally darker as well.

ivy's backgrounds, meanwhile, stay pretty light throughout because she has somewhat of a more comedic and hopeful storyline while carmen dies in a ditch somewhere.

also, as soon as carmen calls chief, the snow/light of the hologram/shot composition away from the dark trees shows that there is hope now

just....hope that is tinted with cop fingerprints all over it. i just GOD i fucking LOVE how you can VISUALLY SEE HOW HER LIFE IS GOING its reflected by the very environment around her. compare any shot after she gets acme in to the very last one i put in that set of five.

no moment is darker for carmen than when she gives up, on the brink of death, and calls for help, submitting herself to prison and interrogation in the hopes that even if vile wins today, she can somehow survive to take them down again another day.

man, i am barely a minute into the actual episode and i have a lot to say. that trend will continue. sorry not sorry. back to the actual liveblogging.

fun fact the first time i watched this episode i did not notice the acme agents on top of the building watching "carmen"

i love the little hints dropped to audience members who arent entirely in the know yet (7 year olds) that its ivy, not carmen, and that something is up here. lack of gigantic poofy brown hair, different stature, ivys little smile as she goes past. of course, if you're obsessive like me, youve memorized every characters outline and can tell even with wigs on

OH hey my favorite acme agent hang on

its her. she is drop dead gorgeous and has a nose piercing. she also i think gets all of one line in the s4 opener telling crackle to do whatever (or maybe its her partner but anyway i love her)

I have already earned from her

have you been GAY for twenty years chief? julia has

julia slays so hard in this episode. wish devineaux stayed dead longer because she thrives when she's by herself

episode is literally so gorgeous

i love zari just being like oh my god this bitches gay. bad for them

that soft little "i should have known" smile julia does when carmen puts her hand on her shoulder guts me like an animal

live acme (ants to classify and monitor evildoers) reaction

hey!! next time ivy gets into a frozen adventure with carmen in germany she gets an earbud upgrade :D

zack too!!

that "but powerful" line is literally gay. happy pride month from ivy "muscles" "milady" "i feel powerful dressing in my girlfriend's clothing" lastname

obsessed with zack's little finger wiggles to emulate typing when he imitates player

i love just how. rrgh casual they are. yes carmen is super serious and focused this caper (for good reason. launch codes) but they get in a little. julia notices something small about carmen and that she's cold and the playful tone in the reply from carmen before everything kind of goes to shit. "had to loan my coat once I spotted your reinforcements!" its just a bit of information but its some that she trusts julia with. she asks julia if chief is listening but if she was. carmen would have already blown ivy's cover. i know she stole the pen for good measure but seriously she TRUSTS her

i love how julia pats her jacket and then does not react in the slightest she was just making sure that was HER pen not someone else's

ivy being horrible in snow gag is the best part of this episode

i love julia showing off. she doesnt get to infodump to anyone else but she knows carmen will appreciate it. and shes trying to be coy about knowing what carmen is there to do (sorry jules. you would have been right any other time)

i also like that as julia is infodumping shes absorbing MORE by walking backwards and gazing around the city hall

fun fact: i always wondered how the hell the acme agents got into/hid in the hall without anyone seeing them but there are doors in between all of those pillars!

also

this hallway does in fact exist! i mean considering the cs team probably went there to location scout in person (see below picture of duane and the team in san fran) it makes sense!!

anyway. should i made an "only vaguely related tangents" tally counter for these things at the end of the post lmao

i love how super serious carmen gets here. this episode is so much more mature in its theming than some other episodes. from the launch codes to the fakeout suicide to the continued death before capture thing carmen has going on. man. i cant tell if ivys comic relief section is good for lightheartedness or tonal whiplash lmao

she has for a split second the look of a mother who just heard her child say "i frew up"

ARGH and i also love how literally nothing julia can say in that time will help. she tries- oh, she tries- but "its not what you think" mistakenly sounds like she was still in on it. it looks, for the moment, like julia was trying to distract her or this acme agent missed her cue or something. of course later in the ep carmen has plennnty of time

interestingly cs does away with the doors in between the pillars for a more ethereal and sophisticated look but there are doors in my heart

i love how carmen turns to run sideways. girl even if there weren't acme agents there where were you going

i also just fucking love carmen's completely silent analysis once shit gets really serious. she calculates and recalculates what she needs to do to survive here. and she's RUTHLESS about it. i think this is kind of the one time we really see her vile training come out in comparison to someone other than vile itself. she takes those acme agents OUT

part of me wonders if carmen, in that little pause by the door, thought that maybe her chances were better backtracking but she didn't want to have to hurt jules to get out. maybe im just gay and wistful idk BUT okay here's my reasoning!! hang on! stay with me!! carmen equals BAD in tight spaces. saw it in rio, saw it in nz, saw it in poitiers. its everywhere- she does better with more space. however, she does like her high grounds, so honestly this is pure headcanon but like,,, not wanting to hurt julia. send post

also you can see in the background julia TAKING OFF after the other agents....no gun drawn of course

this fight scene with carmen is so fucking fantastic

she never. NEVER. EVER does full fight scenes where she does a lot of offensive but this situation is so different. she SPRINTS at that bitch she holds him HOSTAGE and while of course she's acting so that she doesn't get caught the fight almost portrays her a little villainously with the trail of bodies she leaves behind her as she goes

ALSO THAT FLIP OFF THE WALL MOVE IS SO DAMN COOL. she tricks the acme agent into gassing herself almost effortlessly and only takes a split second to coldly look behind her to make sure there's no one else coming before she takes off again

and then the other three who didnt get knocked out start going after her again which distracts her just enough to let zari catch her with the shot

the shaky "camera" and blurred vision pov as carmen fades in and out of consciousness while instinct alone keeps her going up the stairs is just ARGH chefs kiss

fun fact zari's "there after her" line gets reused in the series finale

btw carmen falling of the tower scared me so bad when i first watched this at like 13. suicide fakeout <3 scared me so bad

also how the camera keeps moving even when carmen doesnt even seem to be in the picture anymore before her glider catches up with it. top. tier

and then the stockholm music kicks in. hoo mama the music in this episode is fucking unparalleled. that incessant, chilling, repetitive string instrument motif as carmen's situation begins to get really dire. aurgh.

carmen's continued pov as player starts getting really concerned about her and she fades in and out. carmen weaving all over the sky and crashing into shit grggrgrgr its so good

ivy getting tazed. yeah.

ivy can pass as an....argentinian.. right boys

player and zack when two out of four of their active teammates just went mia in the span of a minute: 👁️👄👁️

man do you think they thought it was an ambush or something. like i mean it was but an organized effort by one team. do you think zack was scared he would be next and that player would be left in the dark. anyway

the way moose picks ivy up by the scruff like a cat kills me

the citizens of stockholm on this day watching a foreign police strike happen at city hall and then a tourist get tazed, mugged, and kidnapped by some locals: 👁️👄👁️

IN WITH THE HIGH NOTES ON THE PIANO IN THAT SAME REPETITIVE, INCESSANT, CHILLING STYLE OF MUSIC THIS EPISODE HAS AS CARMNE LIES MOTIONLESS IN THE SNOW ARGEHDHDHGDGSDGSDHD

i really enjoy that they show us this desolate, still shot of carmen, completely motionless, trapped in a ravine, miles and miles away from the city. she doesnt wake up. its just the cold, harsh reality. and its starting to snow a lot harder.

julia just snatching the pen gets me every time

i love the emotion dropping out of chiefs tone once she sees the 5'2" pissed off lesbian on the other end

YES julia GO OFF she should have gotten to do so much more. she should have gotten to kill someone.

julia glancing back at zari when she says "chase her away and squander her trust" and zari turning away and balling her first is such a juicy little character moment

the venom in "we had an agreement." fhrjhgfejsjjd step on me

you know how people want that throwback spinoff series for the owl house with the lost moments. that but cs. shadowsan's malaysia mission, how the team operated and the jobs while carmen was recovering, more of black sheep's time at vile/her holdover year, her and player learning together once she tours around after escaping, the shanghai job (not the tsonts one), the cairo job, the swiss bank job. how julia got into law, how chase chose his name, more on carlotta and dexter, the two years after vile's defeat and before their reappearance, more of evil carmen, player's backstory as told in silver lion. there is. so much i want to see. tangent tally.

god. player's decision here is such a hard one. he's like sixteen, and he's potentially juggling the lives of two of his best friends with that line. the decision seems obvious, but in this case it is completely, entirely wrong. player's choice to save ivy instead of carmen damn near kills her, and there's no way he could have known. player guilt angst, please!

once again the music. thank you.

carmen's cry of pure pain as she moves juuust tickles something in my brain. she has no one to put on a brave face for and that crash landing HURT.

also how hoarse her voice is

the more groans of pain as she forces herself off the ground they are so good.

i love this episode for its look into carmen's psyche. so much of her is playing off of others, but in this one she is utterly alone. we see her thought processes in the worst of times with no one to fight but the weather and herself. fantastic shit. never forgiving sarcastic chorus for skimming over this episode and saying nothing happens did you watch it

the puff of breath when carmen says "player"!!!

carmen's tone when she goes "oookay." just is so good. gina did not skimp out on this performance and part of me wonders if she could have done better if she wasnt always trying to play the emotionless, suave hero figure and she let carmen be more human, like in this episode. carmen is seeing that she is injured, acme is trying to reach her, her glider is broken, she has no protection from the cold, and that player and any other help is completely out of range and she is not happy about it

carmen crying out when she slips even more when she's trying to climb its so tangible and delicious

FUN ANECODTE because i havent gone on enough tangents for this post already but the first time i ever saw this episode my dad came to pick me up for his half of the week right here. i had to leave the episode right here, with ivy kidnapped and mia and carmen alone in the frozen ravine, the acme pen blinking. i didnt have access to netflix to finish the episode. for. four. days. let me tell you. um. this episode literally did not let me sleep. that first night i was lying in bed i stayed up until like 3am just staring at the ceiling replaying the scenes and making theories. i was dry in the mouth. when i fell asleep i dreamed about it and kept waking up in the middle of the night. i cornered my dad and recounted the entire episode to him and then reeled off my theories to him. i reeled off my theories to my friends. i was literally consumed by the ending of this episode that i could not see. it was Not Healthy and it impacted me VERY HEAVILY as you can see.

but anyway my one theory was that carmen was going to be forced to call acme for help and be arrested because they kept doing closeups on the pen. good job, thirteen year old me. the foreshadowing worked.

back to the episode

ivys literally so cute in this episode

look at her.

ottoman has chihuahua vibes

the ice lodge staff watching two guys drag some poor red haired white bitch into the hotel like a sack of potatos: im sure shes fine they probably told them she was drunk lmao

im goosebumping something wicked here is one of the phrases of all time

DUMSKALLE

that raw, desperate "no" and scream from carmen is so good. that fall hurt five thousand times more because it was a failure. and also she probably just broke all the ribs that weren't broken before

it took me a few watches originally to see that carmen hits her glider on the way down. first time around i was like where tf did she get that wack ass blanket

draw me like one of your moose boys

moose boy unironically seems like a nice guy who got dragged into this by otter

can you imagine if they showed up with ivy and were like HAHA. CARMEN SANDIEGO. what would the faculty do with this poor white girl who is definitely not carmen. probably wipe her memory and boot out otter and moose but can you imagine their reactions

MOOSE BOY IS VOICED BY SONIC THE HEDGEHOG?? SCREAMING

or maybe it was right here that i got cut off with the panning shot of the pen and carmen sitting away from it staring at it. whatever it was but anyway yeah

the sadness and defeat as carmen shivers and tells this imaginary chief that vile is winning today either way just kills me i love it so much. carmen's death before capture ideology (almost. capture wins but it almost doesnt)

LAUNCH CODES? AS IN NUCYULAH?

also team red. didnt know what was on the data crystal!! they didnt know what the handoff was!!! they just knew it was fucking serious and that makes this all the more scary. had ivy not gotten kidnapped they would have missed it. i mean carmen would have probably tried to drag her foot on deaths doorstep ass over to the ice lodge to try anyway but she would have gotten triple pulverized

someone swinging (insert wieldy object) at a gigantic villain and it doing nothing is my favorite battle trope

more ivy appreciation

she said NOPE

ivy is literally so cool in this episode. she's still herself but she's trying to channel carmen and fill her gigantic shoes by making her proud. but she isnt carmen, and thats okay. she ends up doing it with a mix of carmen's help and her own goofy, clumsy style

AND IVYS TWANGY LITTLE VERSION OF CARMENS THEME AS SHE SUITS UP. ITS AWESOME

again. ivy being terrible on ice gag is the best. winters in boston must have been torture

man it doesnt even show all of it but you can see the agonizing that went into carmen's decision to call acme. once she makes it she doesnt hesitate in grabbing and clicking it. she does it seamlessly and with resignation. shes already fought with herself enough in her own head.

carmen: literally in the middle of the woods, shaking like a travelling fair rollercoaster ride, and bleeding from a thousand cuts chief: oh hey! sorry about that

MAN CARMEN THREW THAT PEN A LONG WAY

i also like that carmen has to heave herself up from sitting, and that she's only standing as a last display of control when every other ounce of it has been ripped from her. she has to lean on the tree, still, even to manage it. as soon as she pushes off of that tree and starts walking towards chief she collapses.

chief those business negotiations. can you wait

i do appreciate that chief doesnt play dumb or think carmen is dumb. she's been calling that pen for as long as carmens been staring at it. she knows carmen knows what calling her means and doesnt try to hide that theyre coming for her.

haha. where in the world is carmen sandiego reference. get it

MAN AND THEN EVERYTHING GETS SOO BAD. you realize just how serious this is when carmen drops the tough act and just reaches out. she does a quip, but her face is just hopeless and she drops like a STONE. she was barely hanging on. already dumped this onto rueitae's post but i think that as soon as she knew she'd done everything she could do and had exhausted every single option except dying on the spot. well. she didnt have a reason to hang on anymore. she gave up every single ounce of control to chief when she clicked that pen and her body needed to shut down to save her. so so so good

i really really like chief running over and hesitating before she puts her "hand" on carmens shoulder. she knows she cant do anything, but she can pretend and she can hope

i really do think she was concerned about carmen here, not just about the intel she was potentially losing. this scene mirrors her past with wolfe nearly perfectly, and it NEVER gets talked about. once again a call chief made on a person who turned out to have innocent intentions (gun was really car keys, julia going off the grid was really just her and carmen talking it out) gets them killed- or, in carmen's case, almost. chief, this time, has the power to save her and fix this mistake. parallels are also fun because obviously carmen is wolfe's daughter so double angst.

ivy immediately switching to suspicious spy face after she slams into the bar is so funny

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW OFTEN I USED TO JUST RANDOMLY SAY "hello, im shady mcshade from some sleazy rogue nation, check out my briefcase full of untraceable cash!" to just RANDOM PEOPLE IN MY LIFE with NO CONTEXT

the bartender is not paid enough for this

I LOVE THE LADY WHO JUST GETS TF OUTTA THERE WHEN IVY CRASHES INTO HER CHAIR

the little trill of carmens triumph theme when ivy looks at the grappling hook is so good

girl. ivy. you missed that REALLY BADLY for someone who threw an anchor up three stories with pinpoint accuracy like a couple years ago

poor ivy she was doing so well with the quips and the competence until she announced it to the entire ice lodge

warrior cats girls on the playground

ivys unhinged scream as she barells towards otter is so fantastic

it would really have super sucked if zack had run ivy over

again. this episode is so beautiful

i love that otter and moose would normally have never even been glanced at for an episode because they suck so bad but because it was untrained baby ivy (who still kicked their asses) they could be there also who assigned them the nuclear fucking launch codes. who did that

oh man you can see the smile drop off ivys face when zack asks where they can find carmen. she doesnt even think that carmen is still missing. she probably thinks carmens back on track by now, not that it would be HOURS later and shes still missing.

zack getting to ivy on the other side of stockholm: 🐌🐌🐌 zack getting to carmen twice as far away in the middle of the woods: 🦔 (too lazy to find sonic meme. sonic meme.)

julia just giving zari the most disappointed look when zari kicks carmen when shes down

FUN FACT OF THE DAY! in the original storyboards, julia and zari were supposed to get a SHOOKETH reaction shot when chief offers carmen a way out with z and i. they cut it. rude.

the pen lowering down to reveal julia behind it has always felt like such an important shot and i dont know why. like theres some symbolism im majorly missing out on there

ahh, the heartbroken look between friends

AGAIN this episode punches you like an elephant on steroids with that quiet "is she going to make it?" CARMEN IS ON THE BRINK. OF DEATH. AND HER FRIENDS ARENT EVEN CERTAIN SHES GOING TO MAKE IT THROUGH THE NIGHT. MAN. it raises the stakes up so high like obviously she wont die but in a tvy7 kids cartoon this is so fucking serious

carmen, delirious with the cold and pain, wondering if someone made a clone of her:

addressing all groups of people from now on as "student body most vile"

hey vile has a sick waterfall wall

it is really interesting that they do in fact shut down the academy. no one is allowed at the castle anymore once they move there. its also cool that in s4 because bellum doesnt have to be there teaching she can go to the himalayas and tinker full time!

wow. zuko and luz are in that crowd <3

okay. so. best episode ever. i love it so much and ive already gushed about it way too much so i wont keep you much longer.

tangent tally final count: like at least five it depends how specific you are

sorry about how long this is take it up with a brick wall it will be remorseful than me

[evalolxo]

Fiction Turned Reality

Randy Orton x OC

Part 7

summary- two wrestlers are put in a storyline and it quickly becomes real.

warnings - jealousy, small amount of fluff, submissive randy, this part sets up smut!!!!!

word count - 1.1k

kat’s pov

"is it too much?" i asked trish as i looked at myself in the full body mirror and she turned from laying in my bed on her side to looking at me.

"that dress is perfect, you're getting dick tonight" trish smirked before turning back on her side making me chuckle and shake my head.

i was wearing a dress that hugged my curves perfectly because i had a date tonight, with randy of course.

i looked at myself and adjusted some things a few more times before saying bye to trish and leaving the room, i heard a honk from a car outside while i picked up my purse and quickly shuffled to the door.

i opened the door and shut it behind me not bothering to lock it because i knew trish was still in the house.

i walked over to the car and noticed randy leaning down looking at me through the window with a smirk on his face and his hand on the steering wheel.

"hello there" he spoke as i opened the car door and got into the seat carefully trying not to let my dress ride up my thighs which randy noticed and smirked even wider.

"hi, you look good" i told him, he was wearing a white shirt buttoned up and some black trousers.

"beat me to it" he smirked and leaned in to kiss me which i obviously went in for, as we pulled away he sat fully back in his seat.

"you do look beautiful" randy stated before starting the car which made me blush and i smile at him even though he wasn't looking at me.

"thanks randy" i spoke up and he smiled and put a hand on the inside of my thigh while still driving which made my stomach do flips.

we eventually made it to the restaurant after listening to music and talking shit about people at work.

we got sat down by the waitress who was clearly trying to impress randy.

"can i take your drink order while you scan the menu?" she asked and i looked up and she was staring at randy who was looking at the menu, after a few seconds silence he looked at me confused at the silence only to see me death staring the women who he then looked up at.

she was giving him a sweet smile and fluttering her lashes at him.

"i'll just have a water" he stated looking back at the menu and she rolled her eyes obviously not happy with the result she got.

"can i please have a water too?" i asked and she turned to me annoyed and nodded before walking off and i scoffed and rolled my eyes which made randy look up at me confused.

"she totally wants you" i stated annoyed picking up my menu and after randy didn't say anything i looked at him and he was smirking at me.

"you're so jealous" he stated and i scoffed and shook my head in disbelief at the assumption and he laughed and grabbed my hand.

"don't worry i'm not going to leave you for a waitress, i'm not leaving you at all" he told me and i felt my cheeks heat up and i couldn't hide the bright smile that slapped my face.

"you better not" i chuckled and the waitress came back with our waters placing them on the table.

"enjoy, i'll come back for your food order

soon" she stated and walked off still not paying me attention and only randy.

"have you noticed how she keeps just saying order and not orders, like she's only talking to you" i huffed and crossed my arms leaning on my chair behind me and randy chuckled.

"i'm just irresistible" he stated and i rolled my eyes but smiled which made him laugh.

"damn right you are and it's annoying as hell" i giggled.

time skip

"she was such a bitch, hope you guys enjoyed your food" i mocked the waitress as randy and i walked to the car and he chuckled.

when i got to the car door he stopped me from opening it and turned me round to face him, his body was very close to mine.

"what do you want?" i joked and randy put his arms on each side of me trapping me between him and the car.

he leaned in to kiss me but quickly swerved to my cheek and left me with my eyes closed and lips pursed making me gasp in shock while he giggled and dropped his head to my neck.

"you dick!" i laughed shoving him making him laugh as he pushed himself away and i got into the car shaking my head and he laughed while getting in the other side.

"have you enjoyed your date so far?" randy asked me starting up the car and reversing while putting a hand on my thigh making me put my hand over my mouth and smile subtly.

"i have, it's been brilliant, except that bitch" i mumbled and randy shook his head while still smiling as he drove with a hand on my thigh.

"well we're going back to mine now so who knows what can happen?" randy told me and raised an eyebrow at me smirking making me smiled and shake my head knowing where he was going with this.

time skip

randy tried to unlock the door behind me as his tongue delved deeper into my mouth and he eventually got it as we burst into the house still making out.

he slammed the door behind us and he gripped the back of my thighs as he slowly slid down my body until he was kneeling in front of me.

i smirked at the sight in front of me of randy orton kneeling in front of me with his hands gripping the back of my thighs looking up at me with pleading eyes.

"tell me what it is you want" i told him as he swallowed and gripped my thighs tighter pulling me closer to him so my crotch was touching his chin as he stared up at me.

"i want you" randy told me in the most submissive voice i had ever heard in my life.

i smirked as i slowly crouched down to his level so i was kneeling in front him too, making him taller than me again.

randy slowly trailed up my body before his hands landed on each side of my neck before leaning in slowly.

our lips met and he instantly grabbed the back of my head roughly pulling me in and as i tried to pull away out of surprise he wouldn't budge forcing me to stay kissing him.

i gave in and melted against his lips making him smirk and loosen his grip on the back of my head and i didn't even bother trying to pull away.

[sleepydross]

Chapter One, Route_B: A Hard Left Turn

A Chapter of the 'SEER' or 'Spontaneous Edifice Emergence / Reification' Storyline. This is Route_B. For Route_A, see the link included.

https://www.tumblr.com/sleepydross/736565213088858112/chapter-one-routea-clerks-too-a-chapter-of?source=share

CW: Gore, body horror, extreme death and dismemberment, surreal concepts, disgusting imagery, a lot of really quite rude words (I said fuck folks Im sorry), implications of loss, plainly stated memory alteration and manipulation, horror in general.

Excerpt, 'Dreams, And Their Implications,' Dr. Alex Sing, 2023

'…The understanding of dreams has come a long way, in recent years. We've seen sleep studies, and brain scans, and complicated medical procedures involving the implantation of probes in the brain and the use of radiological dyes. We have seen brilliant doctors, brilliant scientists, translate the language of the brain into perceptible images, things we can look at to see what people see when they sleep.

What most of you haven't seen is the secret, concealed studies that have been done into dreams and their… atypical side effects on local reality. In a number of cases, highly active psionics (Humans with the natural capability towards psychic phenomenon) have outright distorted reality around them during particularly intense dreams. This is, in fact, a detectable distortion due to the common presence of exotic particles and low level radiation.

In fact, the fabric of reality is what we are here to discuss. Some time ago, scientists working for the Department of Unnatural / Supernatural Knowledge, DUSK, discovered that this fabric could be willfully manipulated - and unwillfully. The very concept of luck is a manipulation of randomness in a local area, not a change in reality itself, but a wrinkling of probability…

And with this discovery came the first breakthrough in direct measure of the fabric of reality.

With THAT discovery, the scientists of DUSK discovered that the latent alterations made by dreams were growing more widespread, even in those not terribly active, those lacking psionic capability. Concurrently, a rise in psionic capability was recorded, and has been recorded every single year since.

But the reason why eluded them, has eluded them. Their experimentation began in 1971.

We have questions.

Did their experiment cause this? Or did they merely expand human consciousness into uncharted waters?

We don't know what could lie in those terrible, black depths, in the ocean outside of our collective thought based tidepool…

However, we are smart enough to fear it, unlike our predecessors.'

"I want to know what the FUCK is going on!" Haller shouted, standing in the action room. The site was deep black, so far off the grid and so unregistered that no one present even had so much as a dress shoe on - the FBI and CIA had erected it for counter terrorism reasons, erected being a strong word for appropriating an abandoned warehouse near a defunct rail line about six hours outside of New York City.

Outside of the blacked out windows, only forest and darkness waited. It was the middle of the damned night, and Haller had just arrived. The helicopter on the roof was already working up to beating gravity into submission, the soundproofing turning the thump-swah of its blades into weak vibrations one could only detect if they knew there was a helo taking off in the first place.

On the main screen, in place on the north wall, she stared at satellite photographs of an area approximately as far from NYC as the black site itself, which was little comfort considering that the area was apparently, very suddenly, taller than the empire state building and approximately a half mile in diameter.

"Ma'am, I assure you, we're trying to figure it out," Agent Muskwe said, quietly. Haller watched him sip his coffee and gesture at the screen. "Ground images."

An image replaced the satellite photos, digitally signed as being taken by field team November, one of Haller's favorite teams. Their names were classified, but she knew-

"What the hell?" she whispered. The image description said that the picture was taken five hundred and seventy yards from the 'border,' which had not been defined in any meaningful sense. All she could assume was that it meant the border of the gray, formless, bizarre zone they had looked at from above - a cacophony of squares and rectangles, impossible rooftop geometries laid in and around and over one another.

The 'border' looked like a wall of roiling, nearly oily fog. The next image was zoomed in, and appeared to show trees near to the border withering, branches blackened and dark and odd - wrong, stripped of leaves, coated in some shiny, slick, dark grease. On this image, the description said that even five hundred yards and change away, it stank like the parking lot of an abandoned fast food restaurant. Colorful descriptions were included, of disgusting rot stink and french fry smell and the hellish scattering of other disgusting odors…

Spoiled beef, rotting chicken, soggy and deeply moldy bread…

These descriptions were wholly unnecessary, but greatly appreciated. Haller needed every detail she could possibly get.

"Skip the pictures. November would've sent video," she said, already irritated when the next image was just a further zoom into the fog. Through it, she could see light, the pictures having clearly been taken in the dark. "Show me that, make sure everyone who needs them gets the images."

"Yes, ma'am," Muskwe replied, and the screen went dark. Moments later, a video frame opened, and then played. Compares to the hardware of the past, it was the highest quality video she'd ever seen, especially on a screen so large - save perhaps in a movie theater. Their video, however, had all sixty frames per second, crisp and clear.

"Check for the recording," November One said. "November one. Steadfast. Check."

"November two. Iron. Check."

"November three. Resolute. Check."

"November four. Eternal. Check."

"Alright, gang's all here," Steadfast, November One, said.

"Christ, this fucking STINK," Iron muttered. "We ought get goddamn hazard pay for this shit. It smells like a rotting corpse tossed in a dumpster near a particularly fucking shit drivethrough."

"Oil and diesel, too… gasoline, maybe propane. Smells like chemicals, under and around it all," Eternal added.

"Button up, whiners. Iron, light rig, take point. Etty, back him up with the shotgun, and don't fuck it up and shoot HIM. Reso, pull up the rear."

"Sir, yes sir!" they said in unison. Haller smiled. She liked November for a reason, a lot of reasons. November One's insistance they call her 'sir' was one of them. Out there, doing the work they did, they had some latitude to be weird. It was better than sitting in a goddamn field office all the time, poring over the most irrelevant shit on Earth.

The feed swapped then, to Iron's lightrig camera, and then… the rig flared on, bathing the fog in shockingly bright light. They marched across the field, orderly and in a line, a weapon in frame now and then as they walked. The closer they got the fog, the stranger it got, less white than before, and then swirling in a shiny, chemical-sick rainbow like a dribbling of oil floating on a puddle.

"Can't do it, sir," Reso said, finally. The line stopped. "I'm gonna pop, man, just fucking howl and puke."

"Professional," Steadfast muttered. "Mask up, though. Making me dizzy, too. Ought to call for hazzies. Reso, get out that vial of peppermint oil."

"It's like White River all over again," Rso muttered - but he complied, dabbing some of that oil on the filters of their gas masks. They sealed the high tech things with faint hisses, lenses shining. The peppermint oil was an old trick, from back in the before times, when Resolute was a nurse. Designated medic suited him better, with a gun in hand. "Feed's a mess, sir. We need to drop the rig. It's too foggy, ought to use mask optics."

"Make it so," she replied. In moments, after shuffling, annoyance, grunting and bad static, the light rig went dark, and then hit the ground. Pale, ugly green flooded the frame, and suddenly… they could see, the footage digitally enhanced and highly processed in near real time. "Better?"

"Clear as day," Reso replied. They returned to their march, approaching that ugly, roiling oil fog again. Through it now, a huge glowing sign could be seen, standing on a thick red pole, like-

"Huh… Megaburger," Haller murmured, baffled by that. She knew the colors, knew the ghostly specter of its shape. Silently, before the fog wall, Iron removed his camera and pointed it upwards without slowing their approach. It continued upwards apparently indefinitely, obscuring everything inside. Weather patterns in the area had gone to shit, it was what first alerted them - something was wrong when they were getting hit by sheets of rain in the middle of a New York winter.

"Rain's warm, what the fuck," Iron spat. "Feels slick, too. Droplets are milky white, contaminated with something… and I can just detect what seems to be a whiff of urine, through the damned mask. We gonna die, sir?"

"Composition from the rapid sample kit said it's just some kind of detergent, gasoline, a bit of oil… also piss, yeah, piss… yeah… it doesn't make sense, but it isn't toxic, mostly," Steadfast replied, evenly.

"Mostly! Wonderful," Eternal replied, sounding exhausted already - but they marched on, into the fog, as Iron reattached his camera. What followed was an engrossing twenty minutes of them walking in a white out, cable-clipped together so they didn't lose one another in the thickness of it. Three times, they stopped to dab new filters with peppermint and stagger their swapouts.

Whatever the fog was, it was clogging them, fast.

That made it all the more surprising when they emerged into the parking lot of…

A Megaburger franchise.

"Stop it," Haller said, and the video paused. "We have record of a Megaburger there? Lavar?"

"No, we don't. Look in the background, though, and around it… No roads. Nothing. The walls just extend outward, and then…" he trailed off, and gestured for the video to be played, and then he said, "pause. See? Suddenly, kitty corner, the bricks change to cement blocks, like… smoothly, and it becomes a Fast Jimmy's, complete with gas pumps."

"What the Hell?" Haller asked. No one had answers.

"Command, do you read?" Steadfast asked. After a long pause, she said, "no signal at all. Local comms working."

"Pull out? Something's fuckin' wrong. This shit wasn't here when we got here, before the fucking fog moved closer," Eternal muttered. "Did anyone transmit the recording, from when the fog moved?"

"Did, yeah," Iron spat. "What's the word, Steady?"

"Sir, to you, dipshit… and no. We don't pull back. No signs of life, no hostiles… we're going into that damn burger joint. I want material samples, though. Etty, split off with Reso. See where those bricks go all… blurry? Get samples there," she ordered. "Something is wrong, so we're going to find out what the fuck is going on. As soon as you have the samples, get inside."

A chorus of 'yes, sir!' met her, and she and Iron marched on, the footage continuing to follow them.

"Do we have footage from the Eternal or Resolute?" Haller asked, and got a displeasing 'nope, no transmit from them, their feeds cut out the moment they split off,' which made her want to put a hole in something. "Fucking why, precisely?"

"Interference, of some kind. That fog, maybe, something about it makes signal transmission inconsistent? We only got all of Iron's footage because… well…" he trailed off, and Haller blanched, falling silent and watching. Like every other Megaburger in existence, the restaurant that Iron and Steadfast were approaching was a squat sort of building with an overly decorative roof of red metal, atop which was perched an offensively oversized, bizarrely cartoonish cheeseburger, and a huge cup beside it. Both were lit up, casting an array of yellows and reds out into the parking lot. This was all largely washed out on the white lines of the parking spots out front by the bright fluourescent light coming through the windows that dominated every wall on the front and sides of the store, stopping right at the line where the kitchen began.

Despite that no one was visible inside, the doors were unlocked, and they pushed through them, weapons at the ready.

"It uh, appears to be a burger store," Iron said, quietly, turning slowly to film the majority of the restaurant in the sweep. Chairs were pushed out, food was piled up on tables, cups were stacked halfway to the ceiling and puddles of dark, bubbling brown liquid coated portions of the floor. None of this, critically, had been visible from the exterior. "Stead, sir, something… this place is a fucking mess. It was not, in fact, a fucking mess looking in from outside."

"I'd noticed, trust me," she muttered. "It stinks in here, like it was just jam packed and they all took a shit before leaving."

Rapidly, the camera approached one of the tables and was brought closer to the food - what was left of it. Huge bites, larger than any human mouth could make, were taken out of massive burgers, each one the size of a dinner plate. Thick beef patties steamed, red on the inside and ruddy brown on the out, too fatty, the 'ground' beef used to make them more akin to strange, mashed together chunks of flesh, a melange of unmistakably…

Meaty, fleshy colors. Biological, awful.

They were burgers in the loosest sense, the buns bizarre and over-dense and mealy looking but with an incongruous shiny brown exterior that looked like it was applied after the fact just to try and make it look good. In place of lettuce, there was some unidentifiable, vaguely leaf-patterned green gel mess, a few squirts of too dark, too bloody ketchup… mustard that was more white than yellow - or maybe it was mayo…

"Sir, this food is fucked up."

"This whole place is fucked up," Steady muttered, tiredly. "Weapon at the ready."

"Sir," he replied, and the shotgun came into frame. He squared up, following her to the counter. For a few long moments, they just peered into the half-shrouded kitchen through a cutout on the wall behind the register, and then Steady shouted.

"HEY! IS THERE A MANAGER IN THE HOUSE?"

The silence that met her in response was almost deafening. Slowly, Iron turned in a half circle, looking around - and then there came a sound, a terrible sort of sound. It overwhelmed the microphone on both his camera and its twin on his helmet, this awful air-raid siren parody that sounded more and more like hundreds of human screams forming this rising and falling tide of sonic ugliness.

As the video feed glitched and static flooded the image intermittently, they saw the building shifting, bricks and glass crystalizing outward in wobbly, overly organic sheets from the front of the store. Rumbling appeared to shake the building, and Iron was forced to grab a pillar to retain his footing. When he hunched, they got to watch tiles splitting and sliding and growing, a wholly unnatural ceramic mitosis.

When all was said and done, the entire parking lot had been subsumed, and the restaurant was twice as large from kitchen to doors, with new pillars erected haphazardly, still sluggishly sliding across the floor tiles towards presumably their final positions. These structural icebergs clawed trenches in tile that rapidly 'healed' in their wake.

Iron rounded as if reacting to something, staring at the staggered Steadfast clutching onto the counter as the tile rippled in bizarre, shattering ceramic waves drifting out from the counter, which itself was pushing her backwards towards the entrance as the behind-counter area expanded. She howled, screaming in agony, arms wrapped entirely around a cash register at that point. Red and pink and dark blackish pooled around her feet, those waves of ceramic shredding her up to the like they were made for shredding. Flaying flesh away from bone was horrifying enough, but something worse was unfolding itself.

Behind the counter, a widening, grotesque door peeled open, the wood flexing apart into shiny tendonous strings and awful flesh as a rose made of meat bloomed forth from within.

That screaming siren continued, grew louder even, and the video distortion worsened until all that could be seen, in the center of the frame, was a figure resembling a human being, if that human being was lit harshly and unevenly from the front, and cast a shadow consisting entirely of flesh, of meat and blood and bubbly yellow fat. The mass the 'person' was stuck to the front of slopped against the wall behind the creature, with the flesh seeping through the access window to the kitchen.

Sounds of hissing and popping made it through as the scream-siren trailed off into silence told them that this creature had carpeted over the fryers in back with gore, not giving a singular microfuck about the consequences thereof.

"What can I do for you?" the terrible, blistered avatar asked, a few moments after the screaming siren stopped. This mocking, sick parody of a human torso was still clawing and pulling its way from the meat mass, and as the stunned operators watched, clothing 'grew' over it. Disgustingly, it appeared to be made of woven hair, a chaotic hellscape of interwoven white and black that formed a button down shirt and a tie that were all one piece. Thick pads of calloused skin came next that blackened into a kind of belt-like construction, whose buckle was dark, blackened fingernail approximating shiny plastic polymer.

This same black fingernail formed an approximation of a tie clip, and then a nametag - unreadable.

There was a face, if one could insult the concept of faces so grotesquely, with a lopsided slash of a mouth where the lips were simply just bloody, blistered, skinless facsimiles, dribbling red and this sickly yellow syrup that made its chin all pink and slick.

"F-Fuck, I was just-" Steadfast said, slurring, sounding half drunk with blood loss and pain, but midword… the building went still, and her voice simply ceased. After a long moment, she half turned to Iron. Her lips parted, and thick black and red flooded out - and then the nearly naked bone of her right tibia and fibia, clothed only in tatters and leaking veins below the knee, broke. She staggered, and the top of her head fell away.

For only a moment they were treated to an awful anatomical cross section of her lower brain before blood covered that up completely.

Iron screamed bloody murder, cracking, and in the last frames they could see a thick meaty tendril draped over the counter, forcing what looked a lot like french fries into the sticky black-oozing meat that kept all of Steadfast's thoughts for her, one by one. With each salty new stick of nightmares shoved into what remained of he brain she twitched, or gurgled wetly.

The last man standing legged it, out into the parking lot, and then into…

Another parking lot, leading towards another building.

Towards a Pizza Jam.

"No, no, NO FUCK NO!" he barked, frantic. The poor man rounded, camera directed towards the burger joint, which was rapidly filling up with what looked like squirming, barely human bodies, a pale pink slurry of meat and breading, and enormous waffle cut fries so big they could've been swimming pool rafts. "FUCK! FUCK FUCK!"

While he shouted fuck several more times, he dug in his equipment pack and drew out a gray plastic box, slamming it on the ground and opening it. In a flurry of movement, he tugged something out, pressed something that beeped, and then jerked the camera off of his vest and turned it to stare in the lens.

"Look, I don't know what you FUCKING SHITFUCKS sent us into, but if you don't find a way to EVAC ME, I am going to haunt you until the end of time! EVERYONE IS FUCKED!" he barked, before setting the camera on what was identified in a small block of text in the corner as a transmission relay meant to burst transmit large quantities of audio visual data. He stood up then, and pumped his shotgun. "I'm getting the fuck out of here. If I make it out… I'll get back, I'll call in, I don't know. I gotta move."

When he stepped aside, they could see that strange plant-like structures were growing rapidly from the pavement of the parking lot. In seconds, they formed into beetle coated monstrosities nearly metallic in apperance. Seconds after that, the crawling, bug-covered blobs resolved into passable (At a distance) imitations of cars.

They then promptly rotted, leaving thick black sludge on the ground, from which more bugs, more plants and more cars began to rise.

"Fuck this," Iron panted, and he booked it out of frame.

The video ran for two more four to six minute cycles of 'cars,' and then… abruptly ended in static, with a disquietingly wet crunch.

For a long, long time things were silent in the action room (which was still just the main, large, open area of the . No one spoke. No one so much as breathed, not in any meaningful or audible way.

Finally, Agent Haller said, quietly…

"Well, what the fuck was that shit?"

"Ma'am, that was the last transmission from Iron. It was digitally signed, with little corruption beyond the visual distortion caused by that… management… thing," Muskwe replied, softly. "I did not feel it prudent to warn anyone of the nature of the footage, as… I was… concerned."

"You were fucking concerned? Muskwe, I'm FUCKING CONCERNED! What were YOU concerned about?" she demanded, a cold, hard edge to her voice.

"I was concerned, to be honest, that I had gone gloriously insane, sir," he replied, evenly. "…and I did not have time to ask one of the others to watch it, to confirm or deny my own madness."

"Well, you're not fucking mad unless we all are," she muttered, tiredly. "Everyone saw all of that, yes? Confirm with a yes or no. We saw a team enter a construction hellscape through a wall of oily fog and then get lost or massacred near a fast food restaurant that appeared, to my highly… highly trained eye, to be a fucking LITERAL NIGHTMARE."

A chorus of 'yes' came, then, like a soft rainfall made out of agreement. Really, Haller had hoped for one to thirty answsers of 'no,' because having simply gone batty would have been much easier and much less terrifying. This, this reality, that they had all borne witness to, was truly quite awful.

It bordered on deeply shitty that it hadn't been, in fact, some manner of hallucination - though that alone might have convinced her to go visit a bureau shrink.

"…so what's our theory?" she asked, softly.

"Theory is so often inadequate in the face of actual answers," a soft, faintly accented voice said. This voice was cool, steady, like a small stream flowing in the coldest days of early spring - and it was faintly processed, oddly digital. "Quite a bummer, really, that all of you are now in the fold. I really do find it tiring to orient newcomers, but, perhaps I will assign that task to someone else."

Every firearm in the room was trained on the newcomer before they finished speaking. This… person, of sorts, stood there right next to Haller - or had been next to, but was then in front of, having Haller's gun pressed to their forehead. All of this was well and good, as they had the intruder isolated and contained under threat of-

Death?

Haller stared at the gleaming lenses, lenses staring back at her. The creature, whatever it was, was covered in metal plating, their head all polished glass that might've belonged to a helmet if it weren't for the exposted struts and odd pistons of the neck that emerged from under their chin and around the base of the jaw.

"What the sam fuck are you?" Haller demanded. They chuckled, a strange sound like chimes and rings layering over one another. It was a musical sound, understandable only as a laugh because this creature's head bobbled a bit with it in unmistakable mirth.

"That is a big question with a complicated answer, Agent Haller - but I am, to keep it brief, a robot of a kind - but not a robot, really. Think of me as a mistake made right, but in the weirdest way possible," they replied, a smirk touching their smooth but undeniably digital voice. "I am Doctor Alex Sing, or… that is the name I use now, to conceptually distance myself from who I used to be - security reasons, you see. I've come to tell you all what you just saw."

"And what, the fuck, is that?" Haller asked, losing her patience rapidly - and she didn't have much of it to begin with.

"A 'Spontaneous Edifice Emergence and Reification' event. We call them SEER events, for convenience," Dr. Sing replied, quite pleasantly, waving their hand vaguely at the screen. "We know precious little about them… but we are aware that this is a new, far worse form than we have yet seen. You will ask for credentials. Here, look at this."

Haller looked, the machine person having produced from seemingly nowhere a badge holder. The badge ensconced in said holder insisted that the good doctor was part of an organization called DUSK - the Department of Unnatural / Supernatural Knowledge. In place of a typical shield and eagle so popular in governmental insignias, this bore a strange kind of… seal, or sigil.

"I've seen this before," Haller said, dizzily. The sigil was a pentagram, but its outer circle appeared to be a serpent, devouring its own tail - and in the central pentagon, there was a familiar sign. Brimstone, sulfur, the Leviathan Cross, in all its distorted, time-twisted glory. "I've… I've seen this…"

"A brimstone symbol? Yes, the satanists are rather fond of it, but we were using it first, before even the founding of this nation and our adoption of the DUSK name," Sing replied, blandly, as if this was all very boring to her mechanical ass self. Haller tried not to stare at her hand, a thing plated and padded to function like a human hand, but with open gaps showing moving metal beneath, rods and pistons and tiny little gears. For a moment, there was silence, and then Sing lowered the badge and leaned in, her camera lenses whirring as apertures tightened. "But you don't mean… brimstone. You've seen the DUSK insignia before? Fascinating, and of course, perfectly understandable."

"How the fuck is it understandable? My head hurts," Haller said, her last as she stumbled back and sat down. Muskwe rushed up, and handed her a handkerchief.

"Your nose, ma'am," he intoned, and she pressed her fingers to it, finding they came away bloody.

"Am I going to die?" she asked, a bizarre dread settling in her gut.

"No! My goodness, now, silly, no. You've clearly been geist hexed, some time in the past. You'll be getting memories taken from you back, which is so exciting, isn't it?" Sing replied, brightly. Silence so profound it weighed down on the room like a flow of molten lead followed this, and the doctor tilted her robotic head. "…or perhaps… not, to normal… people. Well, I will enjoy it, anyway, for your sake."

"Goodie for you. Someone fucking shoot her," Haller muttered. No one moved, so she stood herself, bleeding profusely into Muskwe's hankie, and drew her sidearm. Sing did not so much as flinch at the weapon being pointed at her - instead, she leaned in, peering at it.

"Custom work? Very nice, Agent. That's a real stomper of a pistol, and not remotely enough to do me harm," she said, pressing her 'forehead' to it. "I understand. I've violated protocol, entered a black site unannounced, and freaked you right on out. Go ahead. Blow a hole in me, if it'll help. The faster we get you FBI nerds acclimated, the better."

Haller, in a moment of raw rage, confusion and vague nausea, pulled the trigger. Dr. Sing's head snapped back with a loud CLANK, and then… with several heavy ratcheting noises, it returned to its previous position.

"Very nice," Sing said, one of her 'eyes' shattered, a curl of smoke drifting out of it. "High powered, effective, and you're strong enough to muscle down the recoil. Gorgeous weapon, truly."

"F-Fucking what?" Haller demanded. "You're fine?"

"Robot, nerd. Kind of," Sing replied, evenly, as if disappointed. With that, she clapped her odd mechanical hands together and turned to face the room at large. "Congratulations, everyone. You've been formally recruited into DUSK. Your lives as they were are officially over, bummer, but the pay is fantastic, our insurance is better than you'd even believe, and… you get to know all the things you haven't been told about. Vampires, psychics, magicians, nightmares and pretty little machines like me. Ghosts, demons, people who can alter their bodies, secret dimensions and dark dreams that don't die. Your families will be justly compensated after your mock funerals."

"Fucking WHAT!?" Agent Crenshaw demanded, stepping out of the crowd and stalking up to her. "Fuck you! I have a DAUGHTER! She was just BORN!"

"Then unrecruit yourself, dipstick," Sing told him, dismissively. "Divide yourselves into two groups! People who want to give up everything you have, go over there! People who want to keep your lives and forget this moment… over there!"

"F… Forget?" Crenshaw asked, his pale, watery blue eyes wide with a mixture of confusion and panic. "How?"

"Geist hexing will eradicate the memories, sever the pathways to them in an irrecoverable way, effectively removing it all from your mind. A cover story will be generated, and provided to you upon your waking," she explained, patiently, as if speaking to an infant. The doctor raised her arm, and pointed behind her, the limb at an unnatural angle so that an index finger could be directed right at Haller. "You, of course, have no connections, so you have nothing to lose, Agent Haller. I'd like you on this case."

"You can't just MARCH in here, you fucking ROBOT FREAK, and TAKE CONTROL of a literal FBI BLACK SITE. What I am GOING to do is detain your ridiculous metal ass and then call someone higher up the chain to tell me what the HELL is going on!" Haller all but shouted, thoroughly fed up with the utter helplessness she felt as that robot's head slowly tilted backwards like it had when shot, but slower, until it hung down her back and the camera lenses whirred, apertures tightening as they took her in.

"Agent, I am your superior, now," she said, simply, raising a hand. She snapped her fingers, and then… brought her head 'upright,' again, turning around. Haller ignored this, instead staring at her people, all of her people. They were frozen, creatures carved from dyed ice, flickering crystal effigies of themselves. They looked tesselated, rock candy, like models from some kind of videogame showing their triangles as each vertex undulated faintly outward and inward about its origin. "I really need you to stop freaking out, Haller. You're special, I can feel it, and I need your help with this. This is a problem, Haller, one that will kill people - a lot of people, if left unchecked."

"T-The… meat creatures? The manager, the… fast food place? That'll kill people" she asked, softly.

"There's worse about this than all that. Figments that fully instantiate are difficult to kill, for starters, and it will continue to spread… BUT, you have the ability to convince these people that what they do in my service will save the world. I can't convince them of that," Sing told her, quietly. "Get it together. You saw what you saw. That SEER event ATE your people. Working together, we can potentially reverse it, before it eats others."

"Doctor Sing, if you can just make us forget, why do you need to do this? Recruit us? Recruit me?" she asked, after a long pause in which she approached the frozen-mid-stride Agent Crenshaw. When she touched him, she touched what felt like softly undulating planes of glass, a few millimeters from his skin - but this glass was warm like flesh.

"Because you are necessary. When I have feelings, strong ones, I've learned to listen to them. If we are going to stop this, I… need YOU, Anna," the doctor said. Haller looked to the robot, and didn't bother to ask how Sing knew her first name - no one knew it, that was part of her position. She was an enigma, as fake as fake could be, because it kept her insulated from the threats they faced.

"What did you do to my men?" she asked. Sing approached, and drew from the pocket of her suit jacket a handkerchief. When she dabbed at Haller's cheeks, it came back damp, and the Agent didn't even know why she was crying.

"Nothing. There are six men in stupid robes outside, all of whom are affecting what DUSK calls a 'working,' using what we call a 'castgram.' Your men are unaffected, but in this place, time is having a bit of a problem moving forward, except for us. It's not something done… to them, but to the space they occupy, in a sense," she replied, quite forthrightly. Haller was deeply unsure how to deal with this information, but she was forced to accept it. Muskwe was in the middle of spilling a coffee, and it looked like a cascade of crystal that had made it only halfway to the floor. Touching the undulating crystalline surface just above that coffee, she hissed between her teeth and drew her hand back.

It had been scalding hot.

"Thermal energy makes it out," she said, softly. "They're going to freeze to death."

"Perhaps that's why I need you - you've only just seen what civilians call 'magic' for the first time, and you're already working out the flaws. It's true. In about six hours, they would reach a cold point so deep that unfreezing them would, ironically, flash freeze them - their arrested bodily functions no longer warming their insides and all," Sing told her. "So… return to your previous position. I will signal to the men outside to drop the working. Get your shit together, and ride the lightning into an exciting new career in saving the world."

"You're fucking insane," Haller said, shakily. "You know that, right?"

"I'm afraid sanity and insanity are far more complicated than you have been led to believe, Agent. Want to find out how?"

Haller stared at this machine, this woman, this doctor, this interloper and mystery and strangeness of a person. Her eyes, green and stippled with odd flecks of brown, were wide with a kind of feverish anxiety mixed with uncommon mania.

"Yes, I do. I do, god and fucking Jesus Himself Christ damn me."

"Your Christ has been dead a long time, and his so called father with him," Sing murmured, stepping close to touch the cross that Haller wore around her neck. "But, perhaps he was never your god. This was never your cross to bear."

"How could you possibly know that?" Haller rasped.

"I know what I have to know - and it's tarnished, and worn, and has not been well cared for," the doctor told her, in a soft, slightly processed whisper. "It is not something you love… it's someone you remember."

"I hate this," Haller said, in reply.

"You get used to it," Sing insisted, earnestly.

"Do you?"

"Not really. Are you with me?"

Haller stepped back, finding her feet had left softly glowing blue prints on the floor, showing her where to stand. The mechanical doctor sing reached up, and unscrewed what appeared to be the housing of the camera that Haller had shot out. As soon as it was removed, it started sparking and fizzling, molten metal running off of it. Sing threw it carelessly over her shoulder, and a metal plate slid into place beneath the hole, sealing it.

"I am, if that wasn't clear," the Agent murmured.

"Oh, yes, I had figured."

And the robot snapped her fingers, and time lurched back into motion with a sickening blurring of all lights and figures, and a heavy smattering of air shuddering around them like patches of broken, floating glass.

[kurottsukii]

Six | Mother's Daughter

Three months later

Vince lied, it's been three whole months. Three! And He never called her back or anything. So with that three months she just continued with her life. She gave up the women's title but kept the male one, booking and winning fight after fight. While she did that, she was also training in NXT like Vince told her. And it was harder than she expected, Sheamus went hard on her but that's what she wanted. But she didn't expect how difficult and brutal it was, she gained bruises on her back and arms from each training that sometimes left her sore but it was worth it, she got her moves down. Apparently she looked like a high flyer, according to Shaemus. So she learned some high fly moves, such as; the diving clothesline, the Moonsault leg drop, the Somersault leg drop, the Diving headbutt, the flying elbow, and the swan dive and oh my god, she almost killed herself with half of those because she didn't perfected the landing.

While learning those moves, she also learned some submission her aunt used, such as; The Handspring back elbow, the Gorilla press slam and the powerbomb. But the submission move she really liked was the move Mankind used on Shane, almost breaking his shoulder. Which she has now claimed as hers. Before it didn't have a name but now it's called the Death lock. And she was really good at it, she literally almost broke Shaemus shoulder a week ago, now she isn't allowed to use it on him again.

Boringgg.

Other than winning fights, and putting her body to the limit in training, the twitter war between her and Randy continued. The two has been exchanging harsh words at each other for a serious while now , even sometimes mentioning each other on tv.

The verbal shots at each other wasn't much, it was just mocking and throwing insults like they were bulets but, things took a turn once Randy mentioned her aunt and her overdose. WWE was known to use painful secrets in people's life to make promo's interesting but mocking someone's death was too far. This lead Yovanna to threaten Randy pubicly on Twittwer.

The tweet read; "When I see you, I'm going to break your arm and make you not only eat your words but make you swallow your fucking teeth." And that single tweet went viral for a few days.

Until today, today for Raw, Randy was supposed to have a little celebration for himself after becoming the first WWE world champion and today was the day Yovanna was supposed to make her debut and beat that hell out of Ortan to start their storyline.

Just the thought of breaking his nose made her pumped, she spent six hours at the gym than two hours training with Sheamus, her body was a bit sore, yes but the rage building inside her mix with the excitement about her debute overclouded it. She's actually supposed to head to the arena early today, to meet her makeup artist and get her ring attire. She was informed that her attitre was going to be a tribute to her aunt which just made the girl more pumped. Today was going to be the start of her career, it had to be perfect.

Right now she was in a car with Sheamus and Eva, listening to them bicker about which American cartoon was better, children..really.

"Oh for fuck sakes Shaemus! Flapjack is clearly better than Sponge Bob." Eva said in a fake Irish accent to mess with Shaemus. He was annoyed by her horrible impression, yes, but the sound of Yovanna laughing her ass off made his heart flutter, making everything better. The two continued their childish argument all the way to the arena. It was around 4pm so they were the only superstars there.

Yovanna's POV:

We walked in the arena with pep in our step and a smile on our face like it was our first day of school. Eva and I had our arms linked with Shaemus' as we walked down the empty hall in sync with each other. We looked like complete dorks but luckily no one was here yet to see us or to see Sheamus and Eva dragging me out the car a few minutes ago. I don't know, I was excited but also nervous...but also really excited. This was my start in this career, I had to make a great first impression you know?

I can feel Shaemus' hand on mine, giving me a light and resurring squeeze. I didn't even bother to look up at him, I can already tell he's giving me that pretty boy smile he does when I'm nervous. I swear, this man has been reading my mind from the start because he always knew what to do and say without me speaking on what's going on. I'm glad I met him, he's such a great guy and a really awesome friend to have.

Our little trio walk came to a stop once we made it to my makeup artist. Shaemus removed his hand and gave me a tight hug, and I swear, I could feel my spine breaking but I didn't care, I needed it. He soon let go, the warm and safe embrace leaving me which caused me to frown. He didn't even say anything, instead he placed me in my seat and kissed my hand before leaving. That one small gesture made my whole body flush with heat, I didn't even know I was smiling until my makeup artist spoke. I believe her name was Amber.

"You guys are cute." What did she mean by that? Was we giving her the impression that we was dating? Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

"Cute? I guess but we're just friends you know...Good friends I guess." I wanted to be straight forward and just shut down any assumptions she has in her head but I guess my answer wasn't good enough since she just laugh it off and did my hair and makeup. Who knew those two things can take slow long to do, it was either my face and hair was too complicated or she was trying to make me look like Kim K for my first day.

Either way, l looked good. I thanked her and made my way to the designer with Eva beside me. And let me tell you, once I saw my attire, my jaw dropped.

It was a cropped hoodie that was tied together in the back, following by matching black cargo pants that was decorated with lil metal holes on the sides, with chains and straps. Not to mention the cute ass harness and black combat boots. And last but not least, a matching ski mask I'm supposed to wear.

I don't even know how many times I thanked the designer, I can only tell you that I thanked her again six more times after she said I could keep it. This was exactly my style plus it was a tribute to my aunt, but in my style, you know? I don't want to seem like I'm copying her or anything but I want to be able to keep her memory alive in the place she called home.

We headed to my locker room so I can change and oh my god it was big, not to mention CLEAN. I quickly headed to the bathroom and change, I had to make sure not to mess up the hair and makeup once I put the mask on. Why was I putting it on Early? I don't know.

It was now 6:32 pm, superstars were now rolling in. I could tell just by how the silence in the hallway got replaced with footsteps and people talking amongst each other. I decided to stay in my locker room till it was my que to beat Randy's little ass.

Luckily there was a tv and snacks in here or else I would of went crazy with boredom, so whould Eva, who was currently laying on the couch, eating some candy bars which I'm assuming came from her bag. Moving her legs, I took a seat on the couch while mindlessly switching through channels till WWE started.It wasn't long though, watching Love & Hip Hop Atlanta took up most of the time, it almost made me forget that I had a job to do. Luckily I was supposed to make my appearance at the ending of the show, or was it the middle of it?

Shit I forgot.

Just as I was about to panic and call Shaemus, the speaker in the room turned on to let me know that I had to go to the gorilla. That's when I suddenly felt nervous, it was about to happen. All the training and hard work I put in for three months was all about to pay off.

Eva decided to go to the gorilla with me so I didn't have to go alone cuz god knows I would of had a panic attack, luckily shaemus was waiting outside our locker room to walk us.

And there we go, we were conjoined to the hip, walking down to the gorilla while earning some confused stares in the progress. Each step we took towards the gorilla made my heart skip a beat, at this point it was now just in my stomach. I wanted to just stop and run out the building but my feet kept moving. Why was they still moving?! God dammit feet, do as I say and run!

It was too late though.

We finally made it, the crew there was telling me that once the lights cut off, I had to run and hide under the ring, I didn't really know why but I really didn't care. My nerves was still bad, I felt sick, my legs were now jelly. I was beyond scared but I knew I couldn't go back now. I couldn't disappoint everyone. So...it was now or never.

Once they went to commercial, the lights went off like the crew said they would, so I did as told and ran down the ramp, sliding my little ass under the ring. Only to see tables, chairs, and a tv? Why the hell was there a tv here?!

Not even a second later the lights came back on and the show continued, I watched as Jerry and Cole talked about Randy's victory over a guy named John Cena, showing the clip of his win. Just seeing the dumb smirk on his face made my blood boil. My nerves soon got replaced by anger and annoyance. Like who did this fucking jerk think he was?

Definitely not champ worthy.

I continued to watch whatever was going on, not even a minute later music hits the arena. The crowd reacted with boos as three people walked out. Randy, Triple H, and that bitch Stephanie. Three people I hated with a passion, hopefully I could get a few punches on them too.

They soon entered the ring and Triple H was the one to start things off, which was him just gloating and talking about what's best for business and what was best for the company. Honestly, his whole speech almost made me pass out due to how boring and unnecessary it was.

The crowd agreed with me cuz they just continued to boo. Then it was Randy turn, he also decided to gloat and just talk bad about this cena guy. That's when he mentioned me, he started to go off on me honestly. Insulting my career in UFC, insulting my title run and fighting skills.

He had a lot of nerve...and yet he just kept going! I just laid there, laid under him, under this damn ring and just watch him bad mouth me.

"This little girl wouldn't have the balls to step in the ring with me. Not her, not her little ufc buddies, not even her slut of a aunt."

That's when the lights went off, I could hear how confused the crowd was but it was my que!

First POV

Sliding from underneath the ring, Yovanna quickly made her way inside the ring and positioned herself on the top turn buckle. All that adrenaline was rushing through her veins, it was like she was high off of something. She couldn't think, or even focus correctly. She was like a wild animal ready to pounce.

That's when the light came back on and all eyes were now on her. Triple H and Stephanie were the first to spot her with nothing but horror written on their faces, the crowd was silent, it felt like as if time froze for a second.

There was no movement or sound from anyone except for JBL, who was screaming from out side the ring for Randy to look behind him.

Yeah Randy, look behind you.

Yovanna's lips began to twitched, as she waited for him to turn. She knew that he knew that someone was behind him, it was only a matter of time. She mentally begged and prayed for him to turn around, you could say god heard her because within a second, just for a second; Randy faced her and he too was horrified but her? All she saw was red.

Jumping off the Turnbuckle, Yovanna landed on Randy, sending both of them crashing down onto the mat and that's when all hell broke loose. Yovanna just started sending hard blows to the face, it took Randy all his strength to bring his arms up to block her hits, that's when she started punching his sides. Everytime he tried to block her punches, she just kept finding new spots to attack, now everything was going good. The crowd was going crazy even though they didn't know what was going on. Yovanna was getting her revenge even though her knuckles was getting bruised. But everything came to a end once she felt herself being yanked off of Randy and thrown into the corner.

As that happened, Randy took the opportunity to escape, rolling out the ring and making his way down the ramp to Stephanie in a limp with his hand on his ribs. Now this made Yovanna pissed, she was beyond pissed. All that built up anger she kept just for Randy was now ruined and now she was going to take it out in whoever was stupid enough to pull her off.

Her attention quickly went to her new victim and to her surprise, it was no one else but Triple H.

The same Scumbag that broke her aunt's heart, the same bitch who cheated on her without even saying sorry or reaching out to her. Once again she saw nothing but red, that's when she tackled him to the mat, sending blows and elbows to his head until he started bleeding but he also managed to escape.

The crowd was going insane as she watched the three retreat, slowly making their way up the ramp, that's when she pulled off her mask with on yank. Yovanna wanted them to get a good look on who they decided to fuck with, to get a good look on who was now going to make their lives a living hell.

And just like that, the crowd roared with excitement, the arena was alive. You could feel the vibration from their screams and chants.

Yovanna began to smile wide like a lunatic, her eyes widened with excitement, not just because of how the crowd reacted but because of how the three rats of wwe reatced. Their face was written with horror, and she loved every bit of it. She could even hear Jerry and Cole scream with excitement too, I guess they were fans too, unlike JBL who wanted bad mouth her saying she brutally attack Randy and Triple H for no reason.

Randy stood on top of the ramp, completely dumfounded. Ignoring it, Yovanna rolled out the ring to grab a mic, making her way back in the square circle she calls hers.

She was so excited, so full of life and lust or blood, the girl couldn't even stand still. She just paced around the ring like a rabid dog , drinking in the the crowds chants before cutting her own lil promo.

"What Randall? It looks like you just seen a ghost babe. What happened to all that shit you was saying about me a few minutes ago. OH, Don't tell me you forgot? No, let's talk about it. Lemme remind you on what you said. You said, and I qoute, how I was just a weak little girl with...what did you say? Mommy issues? Oh! What about how I was an easy target to you! Or how I wouldn't last a week here. Well..it didn't seem that way when I was beating the shit out of you just now, can we get a reply on that?"

Just as requested, the clip of her attacking randy played and the crowd was eating it up. Her smile grew wide, as she watched the fear on Randy's face get replaced by shame and anger. You better feel embarrassed, you asshole.

"Don't get all pissed and shocked now Randall. You started this, you wanted this! And I fucking warned you. I warned you that when I saw you, I was going to break your arm and make you eat your teeth and it wasn't a threat...it was a promise and I'm not one to break promises. So get your ass in the ring and face me like a man!" She screamed into the mic before dropping it.

The crowd continued to show their support and interest to watch was going on. Shit, even she was pumped too!

She leaned against the ropes, just trying to get the pussy inside the ring.

Thats when the environment shifted.

The fear on Randy, Stephanie, and Triple H's changed. They all shared a evil ass smirk as she heard;

Sierra

Hotel

India

Echo

Lima

Delta

SHIELD

Yovanna, stood in the ring confused, but she couldn't just stay there unarmed. Knowing Triple H and Randy, they had back up, something she lacked. So once again, she quickly rolled out the ring, this time grabbing a chair from under it and rolled back in.

And there, she stood in the ring, looking around like a crazy person to only see three guys dress like a swat team, making their way through the crowd.

One was a big Tarzan looking motherfucker with tattoos on his shoulder down to his arm, the other was a ferret looking, two toned fuck boy, and the last one was probably the leader. He had dirty blonde hair with a hint of red, with a five o'clock shadow as facial hair. He too bad the same crazed look Yovanna had earlier. And this made her swallowed hard.

They all jumped over the barricade in their own weird way, soon surrounding the ring she was in. She looked to her side for a brief second only to see Randy up on the apran joining in too.

She was now in trouble...

But if she goes down, she's not going alone.

Haha!

Left you guys on a cliffhanger, Yovanna finna face a 4 on 1 attack. Is she going to make it?

Not to mention she just put her hands on the COO...if she do make it, WWE is going to be hell for her.

What's going to happen next chapter? Make sure to vote and comment guys! Hope you enjoy

The word count for this chapter is 3,280.

[laufire]

Bruce as a father across the multiverse 🔥

I'm going to put aside Bruce's that don't get children (which are. most of the ones coming to mind rn ngl xD), even if I think I could make a compelling argument for a few of those being primed to be better parents than comics!Bruce -like gotham!Bruce or nolanverse!Bruce lol.

honestly, other than those from animated versions, like yj!Bruce or gotham knights(cw)!Bruce (we don't see him that much because the show is NOT a batman show, but both him and the kids around seem more well-adjusted xD), or dcau!Bruce which I haven't seen in a long time but was overall alright, from what I remember... my mind is focused on the different versions of Bruce we see in the main continuity. aka the one whose fatherhood we see been explored.

first, there's pre-crisis/earth-one!Bruce. I'm less familiar with Bruce, especially with that particular Bruce-Dick dynamic (though what I've seen is complex and less defined than father-and-son. they call each other partners, brothers, and yes, they have a discussion about the more parental aspects of their relationship while Bruce is in a custody battle with earth-one!Jason). but I have read everything there is to this version of Jason and Bruce and it's... well, the most properly fatherly we ever see Bruce, probably? it's sweet. it's hardly perfect or straightforward (this Jason already served as a counterpoint to Bruce, in a much calmer way), and it could be easy to point out questionable aspects, I'm sure -but maybe because I inevitably compare it to the other versions, he comes out shining xD. he's incredibly flaky with women though, I don't know why they put up with him lol.

then there's post-crisis/new earth!Bruce. now this is the bitch I'm most familiar with xDD. and honestly, yeah, I would call him a shitty father figure. increasingly worsening with time, with things taking a nosedive after Jason's death, but he also pulled Some Shit with Dick or Jason (although with the later he apologised and recognised his mistakes once!!! woah).

what I will say for new earth!Bruce is that the concept of BatfamilyTM, while present, was much less conventional than it is right now. while I wouldn't defend any of the shit he pulled, I can acknowledge it was written with more attention to characterization, to the dynamics involved, and in a less... simplified and stereotypical way, iykwim? the ways new earth!Bruce screws up as a father/authority figure feel like they are meant to inform the character, at least most of the time. I feel like I'm watching a deeply troubled man stuck in his childhood trauma who arguably should never have taken a caretaker role over fellow troubled kids, who acts in controlling and damaging ways because of his own issues and might need to hit rock bottom before he could even think to really do better. but there's a sense that all this is in sync with the story, with the path it and his character follows, iykwim.

then there's post-reboot/prime earth!Bruce. current Bruce. mister "I'll beat Dick into submission to accept an incredibly dangerous job after he's already going through the worst time of his life". mister "I'll beat up Jason so badly he won't be able to hold a gun without his hand trembling a month later". mister "I'll brainwash my son and leave him defenseless because he once made choices I disagreed with and he might do them again". mister "I'll never face any consequences for this for longer than 5 pages, if that, and nothing will change no matter what."

the thing about this one is that he suffers the flaws inherent to prime earth: objectively worse writing that veers towards conventionality (if you try to push a more conventional father-kids view of the Batfamily, Bruce's abusive actions read much, much worse), and chronic inhability to commit to anything which leaves writers scrambling to return to a more comfortable status quo, while recycling storylines in a way that makes this come accross as a consistent, undeniable pattern. that, plus the framing of these actions (gotham war pending, but I'm not getting my hopes up) as Bruce-the-stern-Patriarch who must control these unruly kids is. hmmmmmmmm.

I'm not saying that new earth!Bruce didn't suffer some of that but... it does feel different to me because the kid and not so kid bats got to grow and evolve, if that makes sense? and to do it past Bruce. while in prime earth, everything feels in a state of arrested development. stagnant. and thus, unchangeable, unmoving. not all the "movement" in new earth was good or forward but it's a whole other beast, basically. and things now feel like they're more tied to Bruce, like a lot if not all the other bonds go *through him*? maybe I'm being ungenerous: I haven't read a lot of prime earth (and I'm not gonna xD), but that's the impression I'm left with after what I have read.

and all of those factors contribute to making current!Bruce such a despicable figure to me. if we crossed paths one of us would walk away a few appendages down xDD

Send Me a 🔥+ a Topic, and I’ll Tell You My Honest Opinion About It

[theterrorreversebang]

The Terror Reverse Bang 🔄💥 Event FAQs

FAQs under the cut. If you have a question and we haven't answered it, let us know!

Twitter | Tumblr | Discord

Can I submit more than one concept?

If you feel confident you can invest the time and effort to create artwork for two concepts then yeah, absolutely. There will be an option in the concept submission form to submit a 2nd concept. 

We’re expecting the number of writers to be slightly higher than the number of artists so two concepts is not at all a problem - so long as you have the time and energy to invest in supporting two writing partners!

During the claims period we will pair off everyone’s 1st concept first and then dip into 2nd concepts if we have additional writers. 

I’m not sure what you mean by concept?

Two weeks isn’t a lot of time to produce artwork (you speed demons aside!) but it should be enough time for you to come up with some early sketches that will help your writer understand the story you want to tell. Any references you’re using or a moodboard is also helpful. All we need at the end of the concept phase is enough content for the writers to be able to know which ideas they’re interested in writing for. If this still doesn’t make sense, feel free to ping the mods and we’ll figure it out together.

What should go in the blurb for my concept?

Imagine you’re describing your idea to a friend in their DMs. That’s what the blurb should be. It can be short and very vague, or hyper-detailed and specific. But there will be a 300 word cap, so the writers can read through all the available concepts in a reasonable amount of time.

With the art "leading" in a reverse bang, do I need to come up with a fully fleshed out storyline?

We're leaving it open to whatever the artists want to bring to the table. If you have a fully-fleshed AU in your WIPs that you've always wanted a fic for, that works. But if you have just a vague idea, or prompt, or setting and generic plot point (Hickey and Gibson beach holiday or some such thing), that's okay too! Your writer should be able to work with you to figure out how to create a fic from your art.

How will the writers know what I'm after?

When you submit your concept, you'll do so via a form that will ask for information like characters, ships, rating, etc. This information will help the writers pick the concept they feel best able to write for.

What if I don’t know all the ships or characters who will show up in the story?

That’s ok! Stories evolve as they go. But you should know who the main characters are, that way the writers can make sure they’re choosing concepts they know they can write for.

What if I don’t know what content or trigger warnings my story will have?

That’s ok too! But if you’re anticipating including content that falls under the standard AO3 content warnings (non-con, graphic violence, character death) or content that you suspect might be worth a content warning, call it out here. Again, this is just to make sure that writers choose the concepts that they’re best able to write for!

What if I don’t know what rating my story will be?

Mark down if you know your concept will involve NSFW content or not. Not all writers are comfortable writing explicit content - though some are and that’s absolutely what they’re looking for. Here’s a link to the rating descriptions on AO3.

Is there a threshold for what is expected for the finished artworks?

The idea of "finished" is subjective when it comes to art. We don't have any requirements for your artworks in terms of backgrounds, shading, etc. We only ask that it be of an equal level of polish and quality as other artworks you've posted online before.

What counts as "art" for this event?

Generally speaking, traditional or digital art (illustrative, sequential, etc). If you have an idea for something off the beat path, let the mods know!

Images created with a generator or manipulation of work that is not your own won't count as artwork for this event.

Will the Reverse Bang overlap with the regular Big Bang?

The Reverse Bang and the Big Bang are meant to offset each other and we do our best to make sure there's no overlap.

Can artists request certain dnw / do not wants (that aren't major archive warnings, but just things the artist doesn't enjoy) within the context of their pitches?

Yes. Absolutely. The form the artists fill out to submit their concepts will have things like rating, content warnings, etc, but there will also be a place for them to tell their potential writer what they're looking for in their story - including, content that they don't want included in the fic.

This way both partners get a chance to communicate before the claims! The artist can be clear about what they want and don't want, and the writers also have a chance to pick the concepts that best fit what they want to write for. And of course, the mod team is here to work to support all the participants however we can.

By "explicit content allowed and encouraged" does that mean artists can submit concepts and sketches that are straight-up porn?

You sure can! The Terror Reverse Bang is fully in support of cold boys keeping it hot. It gets a little tricky when it comes to posting explicit content on Tumblr, due to the content restrictions. But Twitter and other platforms still allow pornographic content, and AO3 as we all know is wholly welcoming to smut.

[magicshopaholic]

Suburbia (Namjoon x OC)

Summary: You give Namjoon an unexpected surprise, he meets your family for the first time, and you do grown up things in your childhood favourite spots.

Pairing: Namjoon x OC

Genre: fluff, banter, smut, a hint of angst; established relationship, slice of life?

Rating: 18+

Word Count: 9.3K

Warnings: mentions of parental death, moving on from it, semi-public everything, including snogging, dirty talk, palming, nipple play, fingering, mentions of sex, blowjobs, riding

A/N: Just Namjoon Namjooning with the love of his life. Set a couple of months after Industry Baby, but can be read stand-alone as well.

This is also a submission for the summer project hosted by @thebtswritersclub, under the theme "trail/campsite" <3

For those following my other members' storylines as well (hint: Taehyung), there's a cute little Easter egg for y'all :)

Listen to: "with you/for you" by prateek kuhad

namjoon masterlist | main masterlist

Close your eyes.

Namjoon does, feeling his shoulders relax as he takes in the sunlight, warm and comforting on his face. Sitting on the bench, the grass crunchy underneath his shoes, there’s nothing separating him and the light, no sound except for those in nature. The chilly air of the morning feels like a distant memory, and he hopes the flannel shirt he’s wearing over his t-shirt will absorb some of the warmth for later.

He tilts his head back and takes off his cap before running his fingers through his hair. He sighs; it’s only a matter of time before one of the stylists cuts it again, despite the freedom he feels in having his hair long and unstyled. 

Almost as importantly, his girlfriend loves it, too.

He could stay here forever. The air is clean and grassy; it makes him think of spring even though it’s autumn - no, fall. Kaya tends to say the latter and it reminds him every time of how far apart they usually are in distance - or, alternatively, how lucky they are to be together right now.

He bites his lip, feeling the smallest smile form on his lips. She’s the reason he’s here, more at peace than he has been in a long time. She’s the reason he’s anywhere, really, and his chest aches when he pictures her in his mind yet again. Doe eyes, dark hair and a smile that stole his heart for the first time over a year ago. Disney princess eyes. She is his peace.

“Fine, if we don’t get the survey results on time, he can write the analysis and submit it on the weekend. And I’m not proof-reading it!”

Of course, it doesn’t necessarily mean she’s always at peace.

Namjoon opens his eyes and squints at the sunlight to see Kaya ending the call, frowning down at the phone. In skinny jeans and a loose mustard sweater, she looks like an annoyed sunflower turning away from the sun. When she looks up to see him already smiling at her, she sighs.

“I might have a report to proof-read,” she mutters, pouting slightly and making Namjoon’s heart skip a beat. 

“Even on vacation?”

She gives him a look. “Was that something you were writing for fun in your notebook this morning? Or was it song lyrics?” She sounds rather like she knows the answer, the same doe eyes betraying amusement.

Namjoon shrugs. “Why can’t it be both?”

“Fair enough. Wish I could say the same thing about consumer behaviour surveys.”

“It sounded like some poor kid just lost his weekend,” he remarks, raising his eyebrows.

“It’s not that bad,” she says dismissively, sweeping her hair off her shoulders and tilting her face up to the sun like he was a few minutes ago, as though just remembering she’s outside. “It shouldn’t take him more than a couple hours to write, honestly. But it’s good to be firm,” she says wisely. “Keeps people in line.”

Namjoon grins. “That’s hot.”

Kaya laughs, and walks over to him when he holds out a hand. Linking her fingers loosely with his, she takes a seat next to him, exhaling deeply. “It’s so good to be back here.”

“Yeah?” He places an arm behind her on the back of the bench and nuzzles the top of her head, shamelessly inhaling her conditioner. Coconut and vanilla. An odd combination, to be sure, but somehow it just works.

“Yeah, it’s been a while.” She turns to him and nudges his side. “Thanks for coming, by the way. I know you didn’t want to admit it, but I could tell you were a bit nervous.”

“Me? Nervous?” He chuckles, shaking his head. “I wouldn’t say nervous, just… I want to make a good impression. On everyone.”

“And you have. Really,” she adds. “I had no doubt that you would. You know Jae-lin already worships you.”

Namjoon winces. “Ah, don’t say that,” he mutters, feeling his neck get warm. “But that’s good, too, I guess. She’s a sweet kid.”

“She would literally sell her family for your band.”

“Same thing.” 

Kaya grins. “Well, Jae-lin aside,” she continues, “Jieun and Jack already know you, kind of, from Seoul. And my mom really likes you, too,” she adds after a moment, patting his knee comfortingly.

“You think?”

“Absolutely.”

Namjoon nods, glad to hear her validate it. It’s only the second day he’s spent at her parents’ house in Connecticut, the house she grew up in, and while he did feel as though he’d made a decent first impression on her mother, he intended for it to only get better from here.

They’d discussed this a few weeks ago, when it had turned out that her annual visit to her parents’ house would be at the same time that BTS was wrapping up the North American leg of their tour in New York - also at the same time as his birthday. In fact, his birthday was the day of the last concert, something he’d been looking forward to immensely.

He’d been hoping that the days would overlap, that she’d come to visit her mother and be able to spend his birthday with him, too, but she’d cited quizzes to mark and research to complete, sounding genuinely exhausted and apologetic over the phone. He’d tried not to be disappointed; she had a career as well, and he wasn’t conceited enough to think that he was worth jeopardizing all her hard work over. 

He’d accepted her offer to come home with her, though. She hadn’t insisted but if it meant getting more time with her, he was ready to say yes in a heartbeat. The only thing making him hesitate was the reason she was going home at all; apparently it was tradition in Kaya’s family that on her father’s birthday, his wife, his daughter and his sister would get together to honour him. It had sounded far too private a family event for Namjoon to intrude but Kaya had reassured him that the grieving aspect of it had disappeared years ago; now, it was just a sweet reason for the family to get together, especially now that Jae-lin was older as well.

“You were up early today.” Kaya’s voice breaks him out of his reverie. “Where were you?”

“Couldn’t sleep.” Catching sight of her frown, he quickly explains. “I just mean… I’d gotten into the habit of waking up early, for the concerts. Plus, the view of the stream from your bedroom is really nice,” he remarks, watching her nod. “I couldn’t not go outside. Then I ran into Jack downstairs and he was making coffee,” he finishes.

“Say no more.” 

“And then I saw a picture of you with some sort of medal, on the mantle?” He says innocently, noting she suppresses an embarrassed smile. “And then your mom entered and told me all about how you were so sad because you came in second place in the spelling bee.”

“I’m still traumatised,” she points out. “The word was ‘thermometer’,” she adds scathingly.

He snickers. “Well, you looked really cute. Very squishy cheeks,” he adds, pinching hers between his index and middle finger.

Kaya brushes his hand away but keeps their fingers linked, shrugging. “I was a chubby kid,” she admits, “and I loved it.”

“You should.” Namjoon leans back against the bench again, closing his eyes in the face of the sun. “I like thinking that that’s what our kids will look like.”

The moment of silence that follows the statement is enough, as is the quiet chuckle he hears. “Our kids?”

His eyes open slowly. “Well, I mean, if… you know.” He turns to face her, noting her carefully blank expression but the restrained laughter just underneath. “Just hypothetically. Obviously.”

“Obviously.”

“I mean, not - not that hypothetically,” he stutters, wincing. “It’s not like it’s impossible, it’s just…” He sighs in embarrassment as she covers her mouth, shoulders shaking with laughter. “Christ, Kaya - do you want to have this conversation right now?”

Kaya bursts out laughing and shakes her head, swinging her legs onto his lap and reaching over to hug him. “No, I don’t,” she admits, kissing him on the cheek as he rolls his eyes, dropping one hand over her knees.

“Good. We’ll pick it up at the one year mark, maybe.”

“I’m good with one and a half, too.”

“Deal.” He gives her a mock glare as she smiles back radiantly at him, resting her elbow on the back of the bench. He closes his eyes again when she reaches out to touch the ends of his hair before gliding her fingers through it. Her touch is soft and comforting, and he tries with all his might not to think about the fact that after this week, it’ll be another couple of months at least before he can feel it again.

“I love your long hair,” she murmurs, her thumb brushing his ear.

“I know you do.”

“Yeah? Enough that you’ll keep it that way? For me?”

Namjoon turns to look at her adoringly, knowing that at this moment, he’d give her anything she wants. “Enough that I’ll want to, for as long as I can.”

She bites her lip. “Good enough,” she says softly, just as he leans forward to kiss her. She opens her mouth against his immediately, sighing when his tongue brushes lightly against her lower lip. Her hand comes up to his face and hair, tangling gently in the long strands as he pulls her slightly closer by the shoulders, his other hand travelling up her thigh and resting on her hips.

Her lips are as soft as ever, and he can’t help but feel a little sorry when she pulls away. She doesn’t move away from him, though.

“I thought you weren’t a fan of public displays of affection,” she says quietly, looking up at him, eyes dark and still a little glassy.

“I’m not a huge fan.” He brushes his knuckle against her cheek. “But to be fair, this is hardly public.” He gestures to the open woods around them, manicured and maintained to perfection.

“One of the perks of living in the suburbs,” she agrees, now sitting back slightly as she turns to survey their surroundings. “I’ll take you down my favourite trail later. It’s really pretty because it’s further in, with the stream and everything. Sometimes you can spot deer, too.” Her eyes land on something behind him and she grimaces. “And you can’t see your neighbour’s Make America Great Again lawn sign.”

“I’m in. For the hike, not the lawn sign.” 

“Good.” Kaya smiles, brushing a strand of his hair out of his eyes. “You don’t regret coming, right?” she asks, quieter this time.

“Of course not,” he says honestly. “And next time you come to Seoul, I’ll take you to my parents’ house, too. They’ll love you,” he adds, certain of it.

She raises her eyebrows and nods slowly before exhaling heavily. “Wow, that’s a lot of pressure.”

Namjoon chuckles. “What are you talking about? You’re in your mid-twenties and halfway through your Ph.D. You’re kind of the dream.”

“Your dream, maybe,” she says coyly, clearly trying to digress. “And I’m not halfway through my Ph.D; I’m only a year in. And,” she continues, holding up a finger, “I’m not the only one in my mid-twenties anymore,” she points out.

He nods, shrugging. “That’s true. We’re in the same boat now.”

“We are. Oh, by the way,” she says after a moment, “I have a… a birthday present, I guess?” She bites her lip, as though suddenly remembering a private joke. “And I really want to give it to you before you leave.”

He frowns, amused. “What are you talking about? New York was my birthday present. Right?” When she rolls her eyes, he tilts his head. “No?”

“Afraid not, baby.”

“Huh.” 

When the Connecticut plan had been finalized, Namjoon had tried to look at it as a consolation for spending his birthday in rehearsals and sound checks before going back tired and weary to an empty bed. The staff and the boys would surely try to make it special but it didn’t compare to having her there for his first birthday since they’d gotten together, especially after he’d already allowed himself to hope for it. 

At the stroke of midnight, he and the other members had been in the dressing room, warming up for a late night rehearsal before the concert the next day. There was singing, someone had brought cake which none of them could eat, and an embarrassing video was being filmed by Jungkook and Taehyung that they promised they would upload onto the internet soon (“Hyung, hyung! Make the face you made on stage yesterday when the canon scared you!”).

Namjoon was being a sport, playing along and posing half-heartedly for pictures. Even when Jimin and Seokjin struggled to take him outside to show him something, something they continuously assured him he would like, he’d gotten to his feet and followed them half-heartedly, wanting more than anything to just be done with this night. By the time they’d reached one of the private dressing rooms with the rest of the members skipping alone behind them and Taehyung insisting on covering his eyes the whole way, Namjoon just wanted to go to sleep.

All he’d seen there was the room lit up, a few balloons hastily tied to the mirrors which he supposed the staff had done. It looked cute but it didn’t make him feel much better, and was certainly a letdown given the fuss to get him here.

“Ah, thanks, guys. Really.” He’d forced a smile, knowing someone was bound to be taking pictures. Sure enough, when he turned around, Hoseok was holding up his camera gleefully, fingers zooming in and out on the screen. Namjoon couldn’t even understand what he was recording; there was barely any space in the room for more than two people, let alone seven full grown men.

“Namjoon, come on.” Seokjin had clapped him on the shoulder and squeezed it. “I know why you’re disappointed,” he said, voice slightly lowered in the din of conversation. He could vaguely hear Yoongi and Jimin bickering about something. 

“I’m not disappointed,” he’d said automatically. “Just… just tired.” It was untrue, obviously, and while he appreciated their efforts, all it had succeeded in doing was make him miss Kaya more. He’d sent himself down this rabbit hole, there was no doubt. Constantly thinking about her and hoping that she’d be able to change her plans was never going to go well, especially when he indulged himself in those fantasies when he was alone at night. At this point, he was sure he could smell her conditioner as well, a sweet, delectable scent that made him think insatiably of dessert.

When he’s spotted another flame somewhere in the crowd, he was done. The last thing he wanted to see was another cake that everyone would watch him peer at and blow out the candles, another one which none of them could even eat.

“I think I’m just going to head back,” he’d said, taking a step back towards the door. Interrupting the chorus of nooo, he’d held up his hands. “I’m tired,” he’d added in English, taking another step back when he’d heard her voice.

“Fine, I guess we’ll just see each other in Connecticut then.”

The next few minutes had been a blur. Turning around, hardly daring to believe it, to see Kaya emerge from in between the guys; her gorgeous smile as she locked eyes with his and made her way to him; the cupcake in her hand with the singular candle that she was holding, the one he could barely pay attention to because she was here. His feet had moved automatically and he’d reached for her, pulling her as close as possible and straightening up, realising only a moment later that she’d had to wrap her legs around him as she hugged him back.

“Babe, I have an open flame in my hand.” Her wry voice had been what brought him back, and he’d shook his head, nuzzling her shoulder and breathing in the same scent of her conditioner.

“What’s that smell?” he’d mumbled, inhaling again. He was starting to register other voices now, the sound of Jimin laughing, of Hoseok going “Oh, what a shot!”, of Jungkook asking what flavour the cupcake was - but he needed an answer. “Your conditioner,” he’d prodded, tilting his head and kissing her neck.

“Coconut and vanilla,” she’d murmured in his ear, tightening her arms around him. “Happy birthday, baby.”

Coconut and vanilla. He couldn’t believe he hadn’t been able to tell; it was so obvious now. It wasn’t until Seokjin yelled at something that Namjoon realised how inappropriate this possibly looked, but only a fraction of him could manage to care.

“We’ll be right back,” he’d said to the room in English before swiftly turning around and walking out the door, grinning when he felt Kaya laugh into his shoulder and heard the hoots behind him get fainter as he took a few steps down the hall before entering another dressing room. 

She’d hopped down the moment he’d closed the door behind them, holding up the cupcake with the flame blown out. “Sorry, it’s an airport cake,” she’d said, sounding only half-apologetic. “But it probably still tastes really good.”

Namjoon had taken the cupcake, turning it around in his hand and observing the pearly frosting as she’d wrapped her arms around his waist and pressed her nose to his collarbone. “It’s probably the cutest cake I’ve ever gotten,” he’d decided, placing it on the dressing table next to him.

“Well, I know you’re probably on a diet,” she’d reasoned, reaching up as he’d kissed her. It had felt like a breath of fresh air to finally kiss her, to finally have her in his arms after weeks of feeling sorry for himself. She’d seemed to feel the same, her hands going straight to his hair and her body pressing against his as he backed her up against the wall.

“God, I love you so much.” Namjoon had whispered against her lips before remembering something. “Didn’t the cupcake have a candle, though?” He’d murmured, his lips moving down to her jaw and towards her neck, ghosting over her skin.

“Mhm,” she’d sighed, tightening her arms around his neck, “but I think Jimin blew it out.”

She was so hot, he’d thought, feeling her curves against him and letting one hand travel down her hips and to her backside, squeezing it lightly and teasingly. “Don’t talk about Jimin right now.”

Kaya had let out a breathless chuckle before pushing him away slightly by the shoulders. “Don’t be mean. He’s the one who called me.” 

Namjoon had pulled away to frown at this unexpected detail. “Jimin called you?” This, because as far as he knew, Jimin liked Kaya well enough, but he’d always sensed some hesitance from the younger member, almost as if he was intimidated by her.

“Well, he asked Yoongi to call me,” she’d amended, proving his theory right. “Apparently, you’ve been very, very stressed lately,” she’d added, reaching up to snake her arms around his neck again.

He’d just been about to kiss her once more, his hands carressing her ribcage, when the door behind him had opened and Seokjin had poked his head in.

“Er, sorry, but we have practice,” he’d said in English, the words sounding foreign on his tongue.

Namjoon and Kaya had immediately sprung apart, and Namjoon had looked down at her, remembering only now that technically, he was still working. “Oh, right.”

From behind Seokjin, Jungkook had opened the door slightly further and peeked in as well, relief washing over his youthful face. From behind Namjoon, Kaya had snickered, and he was sure she’d noticed it as well and worked out that it was because unlike a year ago, Jungkook hadn’t walked in on them tonight. 

“You can, uh…” Jungkook frowned, biting his lip as he tried to remember the word.

“Skip?” Kaya guessed before Namjoon could open his mouth. When Jungkook had nodded, she’d immediately shook her head. “No, no, don’t skip anything because of me.”

“But I -”

“Namjoon, seriously.” She’d slipped out from between him and the wall and taken a step towards the door, fixing her hair as she did. Despite the fact that he knew she was being genuine, he knew that at least part of her reaction was because she was flustered at being caught with him in an empty dressing room. “Go, practice your heart out, okay?”

“Um -” Namjoon’s shoulders had slumped at the thought of being brought back to reality so rudely, but he knew he couldn’t make it so obvious, especially in front of the members. “Okay. I’ll see you later, though, right?”

“Of course. My luggage is in your hotel lobby,” she’d admitted sheepishly. “Is it too presumptuous of me? Or can I meet you back in your room?” she’d added in a lower voice.

At the thought of her waiting for him when he got back, Namjoon had felt himself stir without warning. “Sounds like a plan,” he’d said quickly, ushering the guys out of the room, Kaya right behind him.

It had been the best practice session of his life. They’d danced alright, sure, but the excitement inside of him at her presence her, just for him, was unparalleled. It had been unexpected and yet so delightful, that he honestly can’t think what she could now gift him that could top that.

“Can I have a hint?” he asks, now wracking his brain for any guesses.

“No. Come on, don’t ruin it,” she whines playfully, nudging his shoulder. “If you build it up too much, you’re just setting yourself up for disappointment.”

“Fine. But just so you know, you being there for my birthday was enough,” he says honestly, tugging her knees towards him affectionately. “Can’t believe Yoongi of all people went behind my back for this.”

“Why? He’s nice. Sensitive, but not annoyingly so.”

“Well.” Namjoon has his thoughts there but he supposes that Kaya would think so, given that Yoongi’s the member she’s gotten along with best so far. This trip, however, Taehyung had taken quite an interest in her as well, asking her about Amsterdam and Europe and whatnot, to the point where Namjoon had started to get a bit jealous before managing to gather himself.

“What?”

“Nothing.” He exhales, content, and kisses her cheek. “I’m just really happy you came. And I hope you enjoyed your first BTS concert that night, too?”

“I did,” she agrees, nodding. “My hot, sexy boyfriend rapped in a language I didn’t understand but I cheered with all ten thousand other girls there for him,” she adds, raising an eyebrow.

“I wouldn’t say ten thousand.”

“More than enough, in any case.”

“Jealous?”

Kaya shrugs. “Of what? I’m the only one he fucked in the shower that night,” she reminds him innocently.

Goddamnit. Namjoon shakes his head at her as she grins, his mind immediately flashing back to how good her body looked under the running water, how firmly he’d held her hips as he’d thrust into her, how warm and tight she’d felt around him…

“Also, Jae-lin really enjoyed her second BTS concert that night,” she continues, and he forces himself back to the present. “Plus, it feels like it’s been ages since I’ve been to New York. I must have had, like, two whole bagels that day.”

Namjoon nods, guessing that she would’ve roamed around the city during the day before returning for the concert. He’d offered to let her and Jae-lin watch from backstage, but Kaya had wanted the audience experience. He hadn’t been wholly comfortable with it, even though there was no way for anyone in the audience to know she was his girlfriend. Still, the thought of her out there, that exposed - it had occupied his mind more than it should have until he’d reminded himsef that there was nothing he could do about it.

“Where did you go?” he asks.

“Um… well, I met my friend Natalie for a quick brunch, and then I walked over to this cafe that used to be a dump five years ago but had the best coffee,” she lists, frowning adorably as she tries to remember. “I ran into one of my project partners from high school, didn’t have time for the Met, passed by NYU…” Kaya bites her lip, trailing off.

“NYU?” When she nods once, Namjoon hesitates before continuing. “Did you go inside?” he asks softly.

The remanants of her smile fade. “No.” She drops her gaze and Namjoon’s heart sinks. He starts to pull her to him gently, but she squirms. “Joon, don’t.”

“I’m not doing anything,” he murmurs, tugging her close again. This time, thankfully, she lets him. He wraps his arm properly around her shoulder and presses a kiss to her forehead. “What else did you do in New York?”

“Not much.” She doesn’t say anymore, momentarily dropping her head sideways against his shoulder. The coconut and vanilla scent wafts up again and Namjoon tightens his arm around her. Before he can ask anything, she sighs and pulls away.

“Kaya, what -”

“We need to get that stuff my mom asked for before she starts making dinner,” she says, swinging her legs down and standing up. Her tone is business-like, rather like the one she had when she was on her phone call earlier. “It’ll get dark soon and we wanted to go on that trail and everything…” She dusts off her jeans and starts fixing an invisible crease on her sweater.

Namjoon watches her, not fooled but also aware that this isn’t the right moment to talk about it. When she finally looks at him questioningly, he nods and stands up as well, running a hand through his hair before placing the cap back on it. 

Kaya notices and cracks a smile. “Your hair’s really grown long,” she murmurs wistfully, touching the ends of it before dropping her hand back to her side. In a move that makes his heart flutter, she takes his hand and loosely intertwines their fingers as they begin walking. “So she needed ginger garlic paste and a wine opener. What else? Oh, right, another box of paper towels…”

—

“We really should’ve made a list.”

Namjoon nods in agreement as they walk down the familiar path in town, passing by a clothing store. “I remember suggesting it, too,” he says lightly, nudging her side. “But someone claimed to have a very good memory.”

“I do have a good memory,” argues Kaya, playfully swatting his hand away. “It’s just… on standby, when I’m on vacation.” Her heart skips a beat when he chuckles and puts an arm around her shoulder and pulls hher in affectionately.

“Well, it didn’t account for what is our… third trip? Third trip to the grocery store,” he says helpfully.

“Yeah, maybe this time you won’t knock over a bottle of ketchup in the middle of the frozen foods aisle.”

Namjoon grimaces as they reach the store. “I swear, that bottle came out of nowhere. Why was ketchup even in the frozen foods aisle? It makes no sense!”

“Honey, let’s not talk about this. It’s only going to upset you.” She bites her lip and suppresses a smile when he continues looking disappointed at the layout of the local grocery store, when she remembers something. “You know, there’s a decent chance they won’t let you in again?”

He frowns. “Wait, seriously? Would they even recognise me?”

Despite the baseball cap perched low on his head, Kaya can hear the note of panic in his voice. “I mean… only because you’re six feet tall and gave them quite of cleaning up to do. Also,” she adds, subtly reaching out to squeeze his forearm, “it happened, like, fifteen minutes ago.”

“Oh. You should probably go in by yourself, then.”

“I won’t be long.” She raises her eyebrows. “You’ll be okay?”

Namjoon rolls his eyes. “No, I don’t think so. I might get lost,” he says sarcastically, as Kaya narrows her eyes, folding her arms across her chest. “I might ge scared, I might even start to cry. I might have to rely on the kindness of a stranger, only for the stranger to end up being… I don’t know, the Zodiac killer?”

“The Zodiac killer?”

“Sure, why not?”

“For one thing, the Zodiac killer operated in California. For another, he was doing his killing half a century ago. There’s no way he’s still alive.”

“Obviously, it’s not the same person,” reasons Namjoon as though it’s completely obvious, looking thoroughly invested now. “You see this in comics all the time, especially. It’s always a new person assuming the same persona, either because they admired the cause that the original villain was killing for, or because they’ve been brainwashed, or because they’re lonely and don’t know any better.” He shrugs. “It’s textbook.”

Kaya sighs. “I knew we shouldn’t have watched the movie last night.”

“It was a good movie, though,” he allows. “Think it scared Jae-lin a bit, though. And Jack.”

“And my mom. I don’t know why she agreed to it,” she mutters, recalling how her mother had situated herself comfortably in her favourite chair as the opening credits appeared on the screen, a glass of Pinot and a bowl of apple slices ready to go. “She hates movies like this.”

“Huh.” Namjoon nods. “So… Jae-lin, Jack and your mom. They were the only ones afraid?”

She gives him a look. “Are you implying I was afraid as well?”

“Well… if the change in seating from the sofa onto the floor fits.” He spreads his arms, a dimpled and knowing smile on his face. “In my lap, I mean.”

Kaya could melt, especially since she can recall every aspect of how it felt to be sitting there last night. It hadn’t been in his lap; she’d gone to the kitchen for a bottle of water and casually returned to sit in between his legs. His arms had come around her automatically, and she’d settled back comfortably against his chest as the movie continued. The living room was dark except for the light from the television and everyone else was too preoccupied to notice; the movie may or may not have had anything to do with it. 

“It was alright.” 

Namjoon’s grin widens as she rolls her eyes and turns around, starting on her way inside the grocery store. She hears exactly one footstep before she feels his arms wrap around her waist, his deep snicker in her ear. “All I’m saying, baby, is that the new Zodiac killer could absolutely be in Connecticut now. That’s all.”

She halts, processing his words, hardly feeling his lips brush her neck before pressing a kiss to her jaw. “That’s… genuinely terrifying, thank you.” Stepping out of his arms, she turns around and sighs, hands on her hips. “I’m going to go inside and get the gummy bears. It’ll take me two minutes, tops. Are you sure you’ll be okay? Or do I need to worry about a world famous serial killer popping up from behind a hot dog stand?”

“I’ll do my best to be prepared.”

“That’s the sprit, babe.”

As it turns out, it takes Kaya a whole five minutes to procure and pay for the gummy bears. Shifting all her groceries into one bag as she exits the store, she looks around the parking lot to see Namjoon nowhere around. Despite everything they quipped about a few minutes ago, she’s used to this. Ninety-nine percent of the time, he’s been too eager to explore, and she’s found him immersed in something nearby.

Sure enough, after walking a few metres down the street, she spots his tall frame with the red flannel shirt in the window of an antique store. As she nears it, she realises she remembers it from her childhood, except she’d never had a reason to go in.

When she steps in, a soft bell chimes and the cool breeze of the outdoors is abruptly cut off. It’s warm and slightly stuffy, but there’s a faint smell of incense that she instantly likes. There’s no one at the counter and she can’t see Namjoon either. Making her way through the tall shelves and trying to be careful not to knock anything down, she searches for him quietly, vaguely observing that the artifacts seem to be less antique and more bohemian than anything, with trinkets placed everywhere, including hanging from the ceilings.

Kaya is following a long, olive-green trainset whe she turns round the corner of a shelf and almost bumps right into her boyfriend. “Shit!” she gasps as he immediately grabs her shoulders to keep her from tripping. “Don’t sneak up on me like that,” she whispers, trying to catch her breath. When she notices him smiling down at her fondly, his dimples popping, she frowns. “What?”

“Does this remind you of anything?” Namjoon asks, letting go of her shoulders to pull her closer to him by the forearms. “Experiencing a bit of deja vu, maybe?”

It takes her a moment, but she realises he’s right. Unable to keep the smile from creeping up on her face, she moves towards him and bites her lip, nodding and reaching up to kiss him. 

“That’s a yes,” she murmurs against his lips, tugging at the end of his shirt. “Except this time I actually know who you are.”

“Better than most people.” Namjoon’s hands are light on her hips, fingers teasing and kisses lingering. It’s enough to get her into it, though, and she moans softly in frustration when he keeps trying to pull away teasingly, snickering when she pulls him closer by the collar of his shirt. “We’re in public, baby,” he reminds her, nipping softly at her lower lip before gently pushing her back but keeping his hands on her waist.

“This is barely public,” she replies, repeating his own words back to him, but she obliges, stepping back and surveying the shelves around them. “What are you doing in here again?”

“I saw a wind chime thing in the window,” he answers, and Kaya has to struggle not to say of course you did. He starts leading the way to the cashier. “I need something like it in my studio. I found something for your apartment, too - check it out.” He walks over to a hanging piece, a series of beige coloured birds with streaks of blue paint. “It matches the curtains in your balcony,” he adds, dimples popping as he takes it off the hook and shows it to her.

“Oh, wow,” she murmurs, touching the decoration, her heart floating serenely at the thought of him remembering the curtains in her apartment. “It’s really pretty. How much is it?”

Namjoon gives her a look and takes it back. “Don’t even,” he warns her, placing it next to a wind chime and an oxidized silver charm on the desk in the shape of an owl. “Oh, and I got this for Jae-lin, too,” he says, picking up the charm and showing it to Kaya. “That’s not weird, is it?”

“No… but what is it?” 

“She’s wearing these bracelets with all these charms and she mentioned she wanted to add more… and she wears a ton of owl-shaped jewellery,” he finishes, sounding doubtful.

“Yeah, those are hard not to notice,” agrees Kaya, remembering the gigantic pendant her cousin was wearing yesterday. “That’s really sweet, babe,” she adds, reaching up to kiss him on the cheek.

“She’s a nice kid. Plus, it’s the least I can do after I broke her mug this morning,” he mumbles, wincing slightly.

Kaya snickers. “I think she thought it was funny. Plus, I think you more than made up for it while you patiently ranked all of Taehyung’s favourite foods for her last night,” she says pointedly.

He raises his eyebrows at the memory as the shopkeeper returns to the desk. “Don’t tell her, but I made most of that up. He doesn’t eat much besides jajangmyeon.”

“Serves her right,” mutters Kaya, moving to stand behind him and leaning against his broad back as he takes out his wallet. He smells of his warm, chocolatey cologne and comfort, and she feels a tingling between her thighs, surely from their brief makeout session a few minutes ago.

Kaya sighs silently in frustration, even as she knows that at least part of this reaction is something he’d fully intended. He’d pulled the same move in New York, pressing his hips to hers in that empty dressing room and kissing her with passion, his hands slowly travelling up her torso. She’d more or less been ready for a quickie right then, about to start shedding clothes when they’d been interrupted.

She’d rushed out of there to go back to his hotel room before she changed her mind, to take a shower and freshen up until he got back. The entire time, though, she’d been unable to think of anything but what they’d been about to do - and what they’d definitely do once he got back. The struggle to not take care of it herself had been unbearable but she’d rallied, and when he’d finally returned, she’d been waiting for him in nothing but a t-shirt and her underwear.

Namjoon had looked exhausted, but the moment his eyes had landed on her, he’d silently strode up to her and pulled her in for a knee-wobbling kiss. She’d pulled him to her, already pressing her hips against his thigh for the friction. His hands had held her close, roaming around her body with authority.

He’d pulled away momentarily, though. “Baby, I’m all sweaty,” he’d murmured, possibly to dissuade her but it had only succeeded in making her even hotter for him.

“I don’t care, Joon,” she’d moaned, bringing his head back down to kiss him. “Just fuck me.”

He hadn’t needed any more convincing, and he’d proceeded to do just that. Throughout, she could feel how tired his body was but every single touch on her skin made her forget, and his voice murmuring in her ear as he’d thrust into her made her legs go weak. Towards the end, their bodies had become clammy with sweat as he rolled his hips into hers, his grunts and her moans echoing in the huge hotel room, until they’d cum together and he’d kept her hips pulled up against his until he’d finished inside her.

Kaya could barely register when he’d pulled out of her slowly, kissing her sweetly before stumbling off for a shower. The moment he’d returned, not even bothering to put on clothes, they’d fallen asleep instantly. 

She’d woken him up the next morning with her mouth around his cock. Seeing him so turned on and feeling his fingers in her hair had woken something in her, and she’d ended the session by riding him until she came, continuing with perseverance until he hit his orgasm a minute later. 

“Happy birthday, baby,” she’d breathed again, dropping down and resting against his chest, listening to his racing heartbeat. “I fucking love you.” By the way his arms had wrapped around her like he didn’t want her to move, she’d known his response.

“By the way, did you find the gummy bears?” Namjoon asks, startling her.

“Oh. Yeah, I did. Got a couple of yoga bars, too.” She breathes in his scent again, trying to be subtle and resisting the urge to wrap her arms around his waist. She can hear him muttering under his breath in Korean as he counts his cash, his deep voice the lullaby she never knew she needed. She closes her eyes, her heart skipping a beat when he hears him chuckle and say something in Korean, her eyes snapping open when she hears the lady behind the desk respond in the same language.

Stepping out timidly from behind him, Kaya looks up at him with a small, curious frown. Namjoon meets her gaze and nods, apparently understanding her question just from her expression. “The sign outside is written in English and Hangul,” he says, pointing to the door as the lady, possibly in her late forties or early fifties, packs his purchases. 

“Oh, I didn’t notice…” It’s true, for the sight of Namjoon inside the shop alone had been enough to lead her here. When the shopkeeper catches her eye, Kaya nods. “Um, annyeonghaseyo.”

“Annyeonghaseyo,” she replies, “but I speak English, too, honey.” Her smile is the only reason Kaya’s mortification doesn’t kill her on the spot, followed by something she says to Namjoon in Korean that makes him chuckle and nod in response.

As they head out, Namjoon loosely holding her hand, the lady says something else. He grins and turns around to respond in English, saying “thank you!” as they reach the door. Next to him, Kaya smiles at the lady awkwardly, who waves them out.

“What did she say in the end?” Kaya asks once they’re outside, the air suddenly seeming chilly in comparison to the warm interior of the shop.

Namjoon thinks for a moment. “It’ll kill you if I don’t tell you, won’t it?” He grins when she rolls her eyes.

“It won’t kill me,” she says dryly, already inwardly annoyed. “I’m just… mildly curious.”

“Alright, then.” He nods innocently, tugging at her hand and pulling her closer. “You were saying something about a trail? It’ll start getting dark soon.”

They end up retracing their steps halfway before taking a detour, taking a left in the fork road instead of the right which would take them back to the clearing they were at previously. The leaves get crunchier under their shoes and the greenery starts becoming a darker green and wilder compared to the manicured areas closer to the houses. It also starts getting more secluded, leading both to gradually drop the distance between them and walk closer together, stealing more kisses and allowing their hands to become freer.

“Tell me you finally get a break after this?” Kaya nuzzles his shoulder as they walk, appreciating his body heat as the air grows cooler. “Like, a longer break than this one?”

“Not until… December?” Namjoon frowns before nodding. “Yeah. Next month is the Japan concerts and then November is a lot of recording so we’ll practically be living in the studio.” He pulls her closer, lips at her hair. “Come to Seoul in December?”

She groans apologetically. “That sounds amazing, actually,” she allows, “but I’m going to have to work my ass off before January. There’s this new research project that starts in the first week that would look great on my resume, and I want as much of my thesis as possible out of the way by then. Plus, I haven’t booked tickets yet, and they’ll be super expensive if I do it now.”

He sighs. “Baby, you know I can -”

“Yeah, and you know I won’t.” When Namjoon doesn’t respond, his hand sliding loosely down to her waist, Kaya winces inwardly, already regretting her sharpness. Hesitating, she slips out of his arms and takes his hand instead, loosely linking her fingers with his and taking another turn. “This way,” she says softly, squeezing his hand and breathing a sigh of relief when he squeezes it back.

They walk in silence for a few minutes, but it’s peaceful silence, both just content to be in each other’s presence. Kaya’s gaze falls to the paper bag in his hand, the singular Korean character printed on the front, and presses a kiss to his shoulder when she remembers what he bought her.

“Did you finally get it?” 

Namjoon positions his camera and clicks, nodding in satisfaction at the final result. “Always wanted a good picture of a ladybug,” he states, walking up to her before they continue on the trail. 

“This trip has been good for many things.”

“Meeting my girlfriend being just one of them. Right after that churro we had in New York.”

“Liar,” she mutters, nudging his side playfully. “Are you looking forward to Japan?”

He exhales, shoving his hands into his pockets, the shopping bag dangling from his wrist. “Yes and no. It’s great to perform there but the schedule is always hectic. There are interviews, talk shows, all that stuff. This time they’ve got us making an appearance for Honda,” he adds, rolling his eyes. “I think we have to go to a Formula One race or something, in Suzuka. It’s literally the day after the last concert - we’ll have to leave Tokyo right after it.” He huffs before shaking his head. “Sorry, I shouldn’t be complaining.”

“I’m not one of your band members, you know,” she reminds him lightly after a moment. “You don’t have to manage my expectations. You can vent.” When he sighs and nods, ruffling her hair affectionately, she continues. “Plus, F1 races can be fun. I went for the Dutch one in the summer.”

“Yeah, probably.” He shrugs. “It’s fine. It’s work. Jungkook seems to be looking forward to it. Hoseok, too. Yoongi would much rather get back to the studio, though, and Taehyung has been bitching and moaning about having to go to this thing since the day we found out about it.” He shakes his head. “I swear to god, I think I’ll throw something at him the next time he suggests staying back in Tokyo.”

Kaya snickers before immediatey pursing her lips. “Sorry, I shouldn’t be laughing.”

“Don’t be. I’ll send you a video.”

“Great. Maybe I’ll show it to Jae-lin.”

“She’ll be the first person I text it to, now that you mention it.”

She laughs as they reach another clearing, the grass softer and the trees making shadows on the ground. There’s a huge tree trunk on its side, one that’s been there since Kaya was a kid, Namjoon makes a beeline for it.

“Hang on,” she says, taking out her phone. “That’s a great picture.” She clicks it, her heart skipping a beat when she lowers her phone to look at it; him sitting on the tree trunk, knees apart, his elbow resting on his thigh as he smiles into the camera. The dimples are visible even from a distance, the brightest spot in the sea foliage around him.

“Show me.” Namjoon slides down the trunk and settles on the ground, gesturing for her to come over, tugging her down to sit in between his spread legs, just like last night. Kaya obliges, leaning back against his chest as she passes the phone to him. “Not bad,” he remarks, returning it to her.

“Worthy of your Instagram?” 

“Definitely. That and the ladybug.”

“Will I get picture credits?”

Namjoon scoffs, tightening his arms around her. “You really want me to tag you on a picture of me sitting under a tree for some twenty million people to see?”

Kaya tries to think, finding it rather difficult in this position. It’s cozy and comfortable, and there’s that same old pang in her heart when she realises why her mind is insisting she make the best of it while she can. She turns her head to face him, his mouth inches away from hers.

“Fine,” she says, dropping her gaze to his mouth. “I’ll take credits in person, too,” she offers, leaning up to capture his lips in hers. He responds instantly, the space feeling private enough without him having to say it. His cap brushes her forehead as he kisses her, his arms and body enveloping her, his lips soft and deliberate against hers; teasing, once again.

“I’m going to kill you, Kim Namjoon,” she murmurs against his lips, her stomach doing a backflip when he chuckles quietly. 

“You know you like it,” he says, his mouth ghosting over her jaw as she turns back to sit the way she was.

“You know you’d hate it,” she says dryly, her eyes fluttering shut as he calmly brushes her hair off her neck. She shivers at the contact and feels him stir against her hips. 

“That remains to be seen.”

“Really?” Kaya bites her lip, deciding something on the spot. “Even if I tell you about what I was planning to wear the night I came to New York?” She feels him pause near her earlobe, listening intently. 

“What are you talking about? You looked incredible in my t-shirt, you know that.”

“Mhm.” She nods, breathing deeply when his teeth graze her ear. “I had something else in hand, though. You know, strappy, sheer, revealing… black.”

Namjoon swallows. “You’re not serious.”

“I’m totally serious. You were exhausted, though, so I took a raincheck,” she explains, feeling his hand tighten on her thigh. “God, but I wanted you to see me in it,” she says honestly, knowing it would drive him crazy. “I wanted you to take off everything including my thong with your teeth,” she finished, fighting the urge to press her thighs together.

His sharp intake of breath makes her tremble. “Tell me you have that outfit with you,” he says tightly. His voice, despite the urgency, is a deep murmur, resonating through her bones and culminating in between her legs. The hand on her thigh moves upwards, snaking dangerously towards the same spot. “Please, Kaya, tell me I get to fuck you while you’re wearing it.”

She drops her head back against his shoulder just as he reaches over and gently palms her core, pressing it through the denim. Kaya has to bite her lip to keep from making a noise out loud, but she simply wants him to continue. His other hand slips under her loose sweater to reach for her breast and she flinches, expecting cold but finding his touch surprisingly warm.

“You’re okay doing this in public?” she asks, involuntarily spreading her legs.

“You’re okay telling me you were wearing skimpy black lace for me and I didn’t get to see it,” he reasons calmly, now moving his hand up to the button on her jeans. His fingers fumble with it for a moment before Kaya throws caution to the wind and unbuttons it, pulling the zip down. Namjoon’s hand disappears under the sweater a moment before she feels it, large and warm, squeezing her cunt. 

“Oh, God…” She can’t hold it in this time and she honestly doesn’t know why Namjoon chuckles softly, as though in surprise. She’s been thinking about what they’ve done and what they’re going to do since he’d kissed her in the suburbs earlier this afternoon; it’s no surprise that she’s soaking through her underwear.

“I’m just imagining what this would look like in the… thong, you mentioned?” His voice is so deep; his breath is warm against her ear, his tongue darting out to touch her skin. “It would just be destroyed, I think. I’d make you so wet, your pussy would be soaking - drenched, even. Just ready for me to fuck you, yeah?”

Kaya nods, a whimper escaping her mouth. She can feel his watch against her chest as he squeezes her breast, his thumb sliding down the hem of her bra just the slightest bit to expose her nipple. He brushes his thumb against it, making her cry out softly at the teasing movement while his other hand makes small, deliberate circles on her clit through her underwear.

“I love your nipples,” he murmurs, his fingers still only brushing it, the nerve endings feeling as though they’re on fire. “I love it when they get so hard for me. Makes me want to suck them,” he adds, sounding slightly hoarse now.

“God, I want you to suck them…” She reaches for his forearm and squeezes it, pleading. “Fuck, baby, I want your fingers inside me,” she breathes, tilting her neck as she feels him suck a mark into her skin.

Mouth still at the hollow of her collarbone, Namjoon inserts his hand down the elastic of her underwear and slips two fingers smoothly into her outer lips, feeling her swollen clit with a sigh. “I’m going to make you cum all over my hand,” he promises quietly, rubbing circles around her clit again.

“Fuck, only you can, baby…” Kaya’s back arches, inadvertently pressing her nipple into his hand. “Make me, come on.”

His hand slides lower until he enters her with the same two fingers, making her gasp as he settles in. “Is it too much?” he murmurs, kissing her jaw.

She shakes her head frantically and slides slightly lower on the ground, wanting to feel his fingers as deeply inside her as she can. His large palm sits comfortably against her clit and Kaya grits her teeth and arches her back, hoping he gets the hint.

“What else were you planning to do wearing that outfit, huh?” His voice is getting tighter now and she knows she isn’t imagining him getting hard behind her. His fingers are pumping in and out of her slowly, his palm finally rubbing against her clit through the movement.

Kaya’s feet start curling in her toes and she knows she’s close. His thumb flicks over her nipple again and this time she moans out loud in frustration, a moment before she reaches up behind her and takes off his cap. She can see his thick hair fall from her peripheral vision and she snakes her hand up the back of his neck to clutch at it. 

Namjoon grunts softly and his fingers start moving faster, his lips at her neck, no longer teasing. “Come on, babygirl,” he murmurs, as Kaya’s moans turn into restrained whimpers. She can feel the orgasm approaching, the tingling in her core, the almost painful heat low in her abdomen. Right then, Namjoon finally pinches her nipple between his fingers and she shudders in his arms as he waits, before slowly retrieving them.

Right on cue, his arms come around her, holding her close as she comes down from the high, her legs still trembling.

“She said we look really good together.”

Kaya can barely hear him. Fastening the button of her jeans weakly, she frowns. “What?”

“The lady in the shop,” he says, kissing her cheek. “She said we look really good together.”

“Well, she’s right.” Kaya allows him to tighten his arms around her before he kisses the side of her head, inhaling her conditioner. Lips still at her hair, he sighs.

“You weren’t… making up all that stuff about the lingerie. Right?” Despite how controlled his voice is, she can hear the desperation in it, making her chuckle.

“No, I wasn’t,” she promises, reaching up to nuzzle his jaw and kissing it. 

He exhales. “Thank God. That would just be cruel.”

“Compared to where your hands were last night during dinner?”

“I followed through on that, like, an hour later. You’ve made me wait four whole days,” he whines into her hair before straightening up. “Wait, is this the birthday present you were talking about?”

It’s not, actually; she’d managed to procure a signed copy of one of his favourite books at a literary festival a couple of months ago that she knew he’d love. But, she wants something to remain a surprise, so she shrugs. “Sure.”

“Not bad, Madaan.”

“I try.” She reaches behind her between his legs, gasping when she feels how hard he is. “Fucking hell.”

Namjoon groans. “Are you really surprised?”

“Not really.” She turns to look up at him. “Your turn?” She starts to reach for his jeans but he immediately stops her.

“Yeah… we’re going to need a lot more privacy for that.” He bites his lip. “Let’s go home?”

Home… as in, her parents’ house. Trying to suppress the smile threatening to take over her entire face, she nods. “Let’s go home.

—

Thank you for reading. Don't forget to drop a review :)

Tagging: @kflixnet, @k-radio, @bbl32

[doctorstephenvincentstrange]

What If S1E4 Meta: The True “Heart”

The same way Stephen couldn’t let go of Christine in the fourth installment of What If...?, I haven’t been able to shake this episode off and out of my head since watching it. I’m pretty sure it’s put me through the grieving process. Lately, it’s been haunting me like a ghost, and while mentally revisiting it for the fourteen millionth time, I realized something BRUTAL that I just had to share ASAP!

Hear me out, homies. What if...

The running theme and title of the episode was Stephen Strange losing his “heart.” But although the setup and storyline seems to suggest the euphemism refers to Christine Palmer, it doesn’t! The “heart” of Stephen Strange is not the girl of his dreams he lost in that car accident, but the greater man he had gained.

OK LISTEN. Let me have a shot to show you what I see (even in shite quality, pardon my crappy screenshots). Let’s start with the DS1 recap, 'cuz I’m still not over the first movie, either, and it’s relevant.

Like the watcher explained, after the devastating and tragic death of the love of his life, Stephen Strange began to look for answers. Not different from Stephen Strange of the sacred timeline, he was obsessed with reversing the great loss and trauma he’d endured. It was with the same perfectionism that made him a great surgeon, that Stephen sought the power to “find his own way back.”

... By any means necessary. 

They both discover that “power” they were searching for when they stumble upon time magic. However, Stephen is lectured that time magic is something that could risk the stability of the universe, and should never be done lightly and certainly never for the sake of one person over all others. Although harm is not his nature and Stephen doesn’t want to hurt anyone, he struggles to give up on his quest to heal his hands, or alternatively, to resurrect Christine. He was told a solution wasn’t out there, but found it in the Book of Cagliostro.

Despite every person that told him it couldn’t be done, Stephen can’t accept that. He won’t admit there’s nothing that can be done, there has to be something he can do. He’s conceited with the delusion he can alter his past to better his present. And he won’t be swayed of it.

But when the Ancient One fell, Stephen Strange rose to take her place and fend against the invading Dormammu. He saw for the first time the world that was so much bigger than him, that he could do so much good for, more than good only for himself. He saw the millions of lives that had not yet been lost to tragedy he could prevent and save from it, even if not what hardships had already been done and could not be undone in his own life. Things he could save, not fix.

And it wasn’t his own life he saved with that time magic in the end, but earth itself. And Stephen Strange became something much bigger than himself. No matter what he’d lost in that car accident, he learned there was still much more he could gain, regardless of what he’d lost. He didn’t need to fix his hands. They were still good.

Better than his brilliant mind, was his beautiful heart. 

His capacity for goodness, not greatness.

And yet, for all the good he’d achieved and learned, on the two year anniversary of Christine’s death, Stephen can’t help but get sucked into his past, and in a moment of weakness, allow his grief power over him once more. He can’t stop reliving the past. He loops it over and over again, trying to reverse fate, trying to find a way to spare Christine and find that “miracle” that must exist to spare her.

The Ancient One has sensed his presence and meddling with the Eye of Agamotto, and warns Stephen that the path he had set himself on would lead him only to more pain. When Stephen refuses to be reasoned with, the Ancient One brandishes him with a single blow before he escapes into the past. He thinks she missed. She didn’t.

SHOT THROUGH THE HEART, AND YOU’RE TO BLAME! DARLING YOU GIVE LOVE A BAD NAME!

But *ahem* seriously, notice how Stephen was struck mid center his chest, directly over his heart. It was in that moment that Stephen Strange lost his “heart,” as the Ancient One had knocked it out of him, just as she had knocked him out of his own oversized head when they first met. Theory: she cast a spell to separate Stephen’s heart from his mind, the two halves that make one complete man.  

Because even if Stephen Strange’s mind was still set on Christine Palmer, his heart had been changed, and there was still hope for it. And Stephen Strange’s heart had enough with “living in the past for one day,” and chose instead to share drinks with Wong.

Meanwhile, Stephen’s “mind” searched the Library of Cagliostro for a way to reverse an absolute point and save Christine. Eventually, he found the answer he was looking for. He needed more power, that could be obtained by otherworldly creatures. Now, harm is not in Stephen’s nature. On his first attempt, he actually tries asking “nicely,” and ends up getting ass kicked.

O’Bengh, the librarian of the books of Cagliostro, patches up his body and tries to warn Stephen. He may have lost his heart, but if he he keeps going at this rate, he was well on his way to losing his mind.

But Stephen didn’t heed those words of warning. He distorted his body, darkened himself with every sacrifice he made for Christine’s sake. So caught up in the memory of Christine’s greatness, Stephen had forgotten he’d once had one of his own. Christine was all he saw. 

So obsessed with her, he lost himself.

When Strange returns to O’Bengh’s side, the librarian has aged and is dying. He reveals the passage of centuries Stephen has spent devoted to this madness. As someone Stephen thinks of as a friend passes away, Stephen can’t think to cherish these last moments or listen carefully to his final words. All he can think is to use his magic to spare O’Bengh, which O’Bengh refuses, trying one last time to reach through to Stephen before giving up and leaving hope to the “heart” to be strong enough to withstand and stop him.

*Wink, wink, wink.* Do you see it now?

Now, onto the confrontation between heart and mind. Stephen’s mind can’t achieve anything if his heart isn’t in it, and I love the symbolism of that. He must get it on board first, unite on both fronts.

Stephen’s heart can recognize that this isn’t love, but the work of his broken mind lost in a delusion. And Stephen’s so far gone down the rabbit hole, he won’t even listen to his heart. Instead he ignores it, even burns the cloak of levitation... the very symbol of his finding something new that could uplift him after spending so long down on his knees in the past... and he burnt it to ash. When his heart won’t be persuaded, he resorts to trickery, attempting to con his heart with the same delusion that haunts his mind. It’s the same Christine that Stephen first was hung up imagining when he picked up the eye of the Agamotto and got himself into this mess, his trump card.

But again, the heart cannot be deceived. It knows Christine is dead, and it realizes the fantasy his mind is pursuing is not the same as the Christine they once knew and loved. More importantly, his heart remembers that there are other people who need him now, people that are not beyond saving. And the mind is done playing.

If his heart won’t come willing, then he’ll just have to beat it into submission until it can’t make a single sound of protest, and then swallow it whole. Stephen makes the ultimate sacrifice the Ancient One had tried so hard to prevent, and abandons that heart she saw so much potential in and inspired her to teach him.

This episode AMAZINGLY tackles the narcissism and arrogance that hides in specific shades of grief and depression. In believing our problems are greater than anyone else’s, that no one else could understand as Stephen insisted “they didn’t know her!” The selfishness that comes with refusing to see the world or those around you that still need you and choosing instead to chase the memory of the ones you’ve already lost, who are beyond saving. If we choose those delusions over our reality, in the end, we will lose everything, and the ones who will pay the price for your arrogance won’t be you, but the ones you loved. Even the memory of the one you loved, that you twisted to fit your mold. There’s a selfishness in seeing only the bad of what was rather than the good of what could come.

Unless you want to end up alone inside a cold and empty shell, maybe it’s time to listen to your heart, and move on.

[myhiraeth]

JASON TODD. / DOSSIER

TAGS. /

                           iisms || headcanons || aesthetics || visage || wishlist

GENERAL. / all verses

name: Jason Todd dob: aug 16 (leo) orientation: bisexual / biromantic  traits:                  + outgoing, generous, brave, selfless, sarcastic           – temperamental, angry, assuming, accusing, snarky   physical features: numerous scars from Arkham torture and beating.                                 NO autopsy scar. NO ‘j’ brand.  occupation: vigilante  notable connections: Bruce Wayne (adopted father, estranged), Catherine Todd (biological mother, estranged), Dick Grayson (brother, estranged), Tim Drake (brother, former adversary, estranged but less so), Barbara Gordon (sister-figure, adversary, notso estranged), Cassandra Cain (sister), Stephanie Brown (sister), Damian Wayne (brother, adversary, friend, its complicated), Duke Thomas (getting to know him but brother), Roy Harper (friend, teammate), Starfire (teammate) 

BACKGROUND:

My major difference from other Jason Todd blogs is my severe love for the Arkham Knight storyline and I’ve incorporated it into my mainverse bio. For anyone that wants the FULL full breakdown, see [ here ] 

For everyone else, here’s a sparknotes of MY version of Jason as it is a mixture of several of his backgrounds / lores: 

Jason was a streetrat on the streets of Gotham with dad in prison and mom addicted. He was caught stealing tires off the Batmobile and taken in by the Batman. 

Jason was trained by Bats but sent to the Titans (hbo) to learn some control alongside Dick.  Jason was kidnapped, injured, and thrown off a skyscraper by enemy Deathstroke and afterward his mental health declined as PTSD took hold the rest of the Titans turned on him. He returned to Bruce not long after. (bruce did NOT leave in my verses, Jason returned to Bats and returned to training) 

*non comic compliant* Jason hunted the Joker down and against Batman’s orders went to confront him, resulting in him being beaten into submission with the infamous crowbar. Jason awoke trapped and bound in the basement of Arkham Asylum, where he'd spend the next 6 months being tortured, abused, broken down and brainwashed into The Arkham Knight.

Joker sends a video to Batman of Jason being beaten to death with the crowbar rather than shot and its Crane / Scarecrow that resurrects the boy in the Lazarus Pit to continue what Joker started. Once risen, Jason's mind is as broken as his body was, and with Crane now in charge, soon The Arkham Knight is all that's left.

From there the events of Arkham Knight happen as canon. 

RP typically picks up post-arkham. Jason took over the crime syndicate of Gotham as Red Hood, not stopping it per se but keeping it manageable, allowing low level baddies to do their business as long as their customers are of age & they keep the violence among each other. To go after children, to allow innocent death in your crossfire, will bring a very angry Red Hood to your doorstep, & you likely won't live to tell the tale.

Now he's living day by day as a vigilante, keeping tabs on "his" city and occasionally teaming up when he feels like it. He's often at odds with Batman and the batfam but always available to have their backs if necessary. He'll claim to not care about anyone or anything anymore, but trifle with his brothers and sisters at your own risk.

IMPORTANT NOTES:

1. Joker is not dead in any verse I play. Not in AK, not in Titans. Jason's resentment and drive for revenge is driven majorly by the fact that Joker brutally killed him and still Bruce refused to kill the clown for it. In my opinion, it's a huge thing for his character and I'm not compromising on it.

2.  Because I'm mixing lores so the timelines get messy, my Jason died&resurrected at 19 years old: 

Adopted by Bruce: 12/13 years old

Robin w/ Bruce: 13-17

Robin w/ Titans: 17-18

"Not" Robin, captured, tortured, killed: 18-19 

Arkham Knight: 19-22

Red Hood: 22+

BIO. / mainverse (default) genre: angst, generally  TW: violence, gore, killing, torture mentions, PTSD playable age: 22+ (generally ~25) 

Picks up in the timeline where Jason has become Red Hood post-Arkham-Knight.

Most open of the verses, available for a wide array of plotting as Jason's just flitting around doing whatever he wants to better Gotham

Default age will likely be around 25ish but will adjust to appropriate age-difference when playing with batfam members.

Jason has mostly come to terms with what happened to him in Arkham, but still has severe PTSD and certain things will still trigger him, usually to violent ends.

love/hate relationship with his family

best friend: roy harper

BIO. / titansverse (by request) genre: titans hbo TW: mentions of suicidal thoughts  playable age: 17

default to Titans-team-era Jason.

this verse takes place while Jason is in the Titans in San Francisco.

available for pre and post-Deathstroke capture

Post-capture Jason does have PTSD from being captured & the fall. This shows itself in disassociation, bodily hyper-vigilance ("muscle armoring"), irritability, flashbacks, insomnia, nightmares, suicidal idealization and an actual attempt after he feels the team has turned on him.

BIO. / #arkhamknightreigns (by request)

genre: Arkham Knight game  genre: canon divergent  playable age: 22+  TW: killing 

open to plotting, not as "easy" to plot as the mainverse or titans as it relies on completely alternate happenings to the universe.– playable age: 22+

alternate universe where Jason succeeds at killing Batman. He proceeds to kill Scarecrow live on air and "save" Gotham, becoming the new hero of the city. Arkham Knight takes over Gotham and establishes a military-style takeover where *he's* in charge and all crime is only what he allows to exist.

He takes control of Crane's henchmen, as well as Roman's after his death, and Arkham Knight's police state is born.– It's a funny loophole space for the Justice League where no one can really prove whether AK or Scarecrow killed Batman and while Gotham is in a martial law / police state situation, AK is technically keeping crime down and innocent bystanders are more scared but physically safer than they had been previously.

[dragonheart-swtor]

Sith Inquisitor Storyline: Drunk History Version

Y’all, and by y’all I mean one person (@sith-shenanigans thank you very much), asked for it, and I live to repeat this over and over for others’ amusement, so here it is. Have my summary of the pinball machine that is the Sith Inquisitor storyline, from memory, originally drafted a while back in DMs with a friend who’s never played SWTOR. Spoilers for the Sith Inquisitor storyline, obviously.

Without further ado: Let us begin.

- So your story begins as a recently sort-of-freed slave walking off a ship and onto Hell: The Planet. (The nonhuman Inquisitor immediately experiences 2483947 microaggressions.)

- You have to compete with a bunch of other people! Only one of you is not going to die and the overseer has already picked his favorite, seemingly purely because he happens to have red skin. They will both (the overseer and Teacher’s Pet) proceed to be as annoying as possible for the rest of the Korriban story.

- multiple people try to kill you, but you’re the protagonist, so fuck them

- “Teacher’s Pet, you go to the library and translate these texts. Protagonist, you go to this ancient tomb and figure out how to retrieve an artifact from a lock that no one has been able to open in ten thousand years.” “Libraries are boring anyway. Yawn.”

- You finally get to smackdown with Teacher’s Pet, which is satisfying as hell. Unfortunately the overseer gets pissy about it. Fortunately, the Sith you’ve been competing to be the apprentice of decided she liked you early on and has also been playing favorites, so you don’t die immediately.

- your master is great! much more into positive reinforcement than most Sith.

- at some point you semi-accidentally steal someone else's cult on Nar Shaddaa and now they worship you as a nigh-on god. whoops. you just kind of... leave and let them run their own business. you pay them visits later in the storyline.

- you also become part bug so you can go skinny dipping in radioactive waste. it’s fine, we promise.

- your master is trying to steal your body because turns out she's actually really old and kind of dying so she plans on kicking you out of your body, transplanting her own soul in your place, killing her old body, and assuming your identity after "you" "killed" "your master"! that's not great, better not let her do that.

-  you successfully didn't let her do that! wait, now she's sharing a body with one of your companions, an ancient monster who you kind of forced into submission and who serves you rather unwillingly now. there is apparently nothing that can be done about this so sometimes your eight-foot-tall monster not-friend talks in a high, unnervingly smooth feminine voice and tries to convince you she's on your side now that she's forced by this new body to not harm you. this is also not great but what are you gonna do. he is also Not Pleased about this by the way, and really who can blame him.

- some darth on the dark council named Thanaton decides to get pissy with you for reasons I don't remember and now he's trying to kill you. what the fuck.

-  he actually almost does kill you but your old master's other apprentices, who are now your apprentices, save you from the brink of death.

- (the apprentices, by the way, are very sweet and I love them. they’re murdered by thanaton almost immediately.)

-  your solution to "I need more power, fast", for some godforsaken reason, is "I'm going to learn to walk the line between life and death and EAT GHOSTS" and I wish I were exaggerating this

- you go out and eat a bunch of ghosts of old Sith on various planets

- subpoint to this: on one of these planets, you accomplish this by coercing the ghost's descendant, a Jedi padawan named Ashara, to get the ghost to appear so you can eat him. You end up murdering her masters in the process because one way or another they find out about your plan. She is understandably horrified by this turn of events and, feeling she has no chance of returning to the Jedi, reluctantly joins your crew and either (Light Side Quizzy) learns to balance light and dark sides of the Force and becomes ultimately stronger for it, or (Dark Side Quizzy) lives in abject terror of you for the rest of the storyline. I love her dearly as well. fortunately she is not murdered by thanaton.

- congrats! you ate enough ghosts to have enough power to beat thanaton up!

- unfortunately, you have Ate Too Many Ghosts Disease now and need immediate medical attention.

- your mind kind of just Shatters and you may or may not have hallucinations for a while iirc. either way you need help or you're just gonna disintegrate slowly until the ghosts overwhelm you and take over. you go to Voss and participate in some wild Force ritual they've got to take care of that. it's a fun time

- your body is also having a bad time and that also needs fixing; I don't remember where you go for this (Belsavis, I think?) but you end up checking out a machine made by a long-dead alien civilization and the machine turns out to a) be sentient and b) be responsible for CREATING A GOOD PORTION OF THE GALAXY'S NEAR-HUMAN SPECIES, IF NOT ALL OF THEM, AND DISSEMINATING THEM TO THE GALAXY AS PART OF THE RAKATA'S EXPERIMENTS ON CREATING FORCE-SENSITIVE LIFEFORMS IN HOPES OF KEEPING THEIR OWN SPECIES FROM DYING OUT BECAUSE THEY WERE SUPER RACIST AND EVENTUALLY THAT RACISM KICKED THEM IN THE ASS IN THE FORM OF A MASS REVOLUTION THAT WIPED THEM OUT COMPLETELY BUT THE MACHINE IS STILL HERE

- all right I’m calm sorry I derailed for a moment

- I have a lot of thoughts about things

-  anyway the machine bUILDS YOU A NEW FUCKING BODY and you're good to go now

-  (by the way, depending what species you're playing, it's entirely possible you learn at this point that your entire species only exists because of this machine!)

- (anyway.)

- okay, mind fixed, body fixed, ghosts consumed, we're good to go! time to murder a dark councilor!

- "we do that"

- except you don't because you're on corellia and this dipshit challenges you to a kaggath without really ever explaining in detail what a kaggath is or what the rules (if any) are, we just know it seems to be the ancient and very formal Sith way of saying "meet me in the denny's parking lot at 3am if you want an ass-kicking", and then hE RUNS OFF TO DROMUND KAAS WHICH DEPENDING ON WHAT GALAXY MAP YOU BELIEVE IS UP TO FIVE DAYS' TRAVEL AWAY

- YOU'RE CANONICALLY JUST CHASING THIS LITTLE BITCH THROUGH SPACE FOR FIVE DAYS AFTER HE CHALLENGED YOU

-  he then goes to the Dark Council to try to convince them to help him kill you and you literally have to just go to the Dark Council chambers too and kick in the door and go "HEARD YOU WERE TALKIN SHIT" in front of everyone

- (which to be fair is basically Sith philosophy in a nutshell)

-  Ravage and Marr spend this entire council meeting just exchanging tired glances and going "no, fuck you, why can't you kill them, they're your problem. fight for our entertainment now. fuck you"

- (Darth Baras did this exact same shit earlier the same day, by the way, with the Sith Warrior. and by “earlier the same day” I mean “like fifteen minutes prior to this.”)

- you fight Thanaton. to no one's surprise, because you're the protagonist and because he's being a little bitch about it, you kick his ass and slaughter him in front of everyone

- half the Council stands up and you just kind of go "oh shit I'm gonna die"

- but no

- you're being promoted

- congration you done it you're a dark councilor now

- someone complains because wait, they're not even a darth, you can't be a dark councilor if you're not even a darth

- first person responds with "well fuck you then, we'll make them a darth. hey you. your name is Darth Nox (dark side)/Imperius (light side)/Occulus (neutral) now. take a seat"

- "but - what?"

- "take a fuckin seat, babe"

- "o- okay" 

- "you run the entire Ancient Knowledge sector now, by the way, despite the fact that you may or may not be illiterate due to having been raised a slave, because that was what Thanaton ran and we only have the one job opening since the Warrior just killed Baras"

- (the Warrior, freshly coined the Emperor's Wrath officially, waves from their corner where they're cleaning Baras's blood off their boots)

- "I - okay, I guess"

and that’s the Sith Inquisitor storyline. That’s a wrap, folks, roll credits. if this gets enough notes and/or if literally anyone says they’d like to see it I may also post the Imperial Agent and/or do other class stories, I enjoy these way too much

[zawadni]

Okay, everything I say in this is very basic information about the characters that you find out early in their route or you find out at some point while playing anyone else’s route. Nothing is a heavy spoiler that will ruin the story line.

Julien - sexy as fuck I know, but is a whiny bitch and almost all of the fandom can agree he is a bottom or/and submissive. Of course there are people who head cannon otherwise, and that’s okay. I haven’t played his entire route just cuz he isn’t my type personality wise, but basically he is a wanted man of Vesuvia and a plague doctor. He likes spending his time in bars getting drunk and has been known to be a bit of a bard! However he is INCREDIBLY BOOK SMART! Man can read and write which is really great for someone in this setting, is a doctor, and I think he is bilingual if I remember correctly. That might be a popular head cannon. He is a little flirty if I remember correctly!

Asra - magician, cute lamb dude with a pet snake, IS NOT AN INNOCENT LAMB THOUGH. Technically like the 707 or Mammon of the game and loves you in every route. The MC is his apprentice in every route. We often see him visiting the shop the two of you run for brief periods of time before leaving to a mysterious location on a mysterious quest again. Mischievous and romantic. I have played his entire route and I like it but his reversed end is creepy as hell-

Nadia - the countess. Boss bitch. She is a bad ass bitch but so fucking kind and empathetic at the same time. She actually cares about her people and married into the family, does not have any kids, prefers when the MC is direct with her instead of lying or beating around the bush. Loves to tease.

Muriel - MOUNTAIN OF A GENTLE GIANT OF A MAN! I REPEAT- GENTLE GIANT! Big buff awkward man who lives in the woods alone with his chickens and wolf. Very sweet. Very large. Standoffish and cold at first but he opens up to you. He is pretty shy and doesn’t like big crowds- he has an interesting back story though that I won’t get into here.

Lucio - the dead count of Vesuvia. His death is a little bit a part of the storyline for every route and there is a lot more to the story than you think. HE HAS TWO ADORABLE DOGS! I love his dogs. They are hunting dogs and are absolutely adorable. We see them most in his route and Nadia’s route but they make an appearance in every route, they are characters. He himself is arrogant, self centered, overly confident, thinks he is beloved but everyone kind of finds him annoying, and likes goats. He has good points and so far I like his route. He is very prideful. You might not like him in other people’s routes, you’re not supposed to as he is the antagonist, but I’ve found his route to be pretty interesting so far. I’m also a sucker for a man who loves his dogs- dude he treats his dogs better than anyone else. Yes, he is a ghost technically but again, there is a lot more to that story than you think there is.

Portia - best friend. Bubbly, flirty, and so much fun! She will prioritize you and protect you even if she is just Nadia’s favorite servant. Has a kitty named PeiPei! She loves to laugh and is very curious. She doesn’t mind getting into some mischief. Has a brother.

The Arcana story line it’s self is mostly a romantic tragedy. There are adorable and gorgeous CGs you can get and the paid options I HIGHLY recommend saving up for because I’ve found it to be so worth it. You can obviously go back and replay chapters to see paid options and get cgs I think it just costs a key or something.

The arcana is also mostly just story. There is the wheel you can spin daily where your either get coins or a trinket. Collect the trinkets to unlock 3 specific side stories. After you’ve gotten them all and played them all then you can start selling trinkets. You have to sell them in groups of 10 and every 10 gives you 50 coins.

There is the post card game. It’s a mini board game where you can collect post cards from your favorite characters. You get three plays per day and at most can get one post card per play. I always suggest picking what character you go for based on what character you’re able to get to on the first roll. Once you play the game you’ll understand it better, I’m pretty sure they give you a tutorial. If they don’t, watch someone else playing it on YouTube really quick, it’s not hard concept I am just bad at explaining it which is why I’m in even attempting to right now lol.

And there is the daily coins you get when your log in. Every 7 days, instead of coins you get a tarot reading (that you don’t have to use immediately) that can be performed by Asra, Nadia, or Julien. (The original three game characters)

To get keys, it should give you keys after a set amount of hours. However pretty often they find something to celebrate and will have days of infinite keys or giving us keys and coins. It’ll take a little while but I’ve found that it’s one of the more generous games.

If you’re want to know anything else, I will happily share.

thanks dude

[kyndaris]

A Hero Lies in You

On April Fool’s Day 2019, a video was released showing the latest game in the Yakuza franchise. Many thought it was a prank. The reason why? The sudden change in combat. Gone was the brawler beat-em-up that was associated with the series. In its stead was a turn-based system reminiscent of role-playing games. Characters waiting for their turns before utilising special skills? In a franchise known for its hard gritty storylines about gangs duking it out in the streets of Japan? ‘Haha Ryu Ga Gotoku. You thought you could fool us, but we see right through you. This isn’t our first rodeo and you’re not Square Enix,’ was many a thought when the footage had been viewed by thousands online.

What gamers did not know was that this was no gag. Fast forward several months to August 2019 and it was confirmed that Yakuza 7: Like a Dragon, starring new protagonist Kasuga Ichiban, would actually incorporate turn-based battles. There would even be JOBS! 

As I had just finished playing through Kiryu’s story, as well as Judgment, in 2020 I was eager to see what new protagonist Kasuga Ichiban would bring to the table. From trailers, I could already see how much livelier Ichiban would be in comparison to the more stoic Kiryu. And, in contrast to Yagami, he was definitely more of an idiot. A lovable idiot, to be sure, but an idiot nonetheless.

Yakuza 7: Like a Dragon released in a huge week for video games. While I would have preferred to play it earlier, I had other huge titans to wrestle into submission first. Once I had managed to satiate my Ubisoft open-world needs with Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla, I dived head first onto the streets of Yokohama, ready to bust some heads.

The game opens on a play. For a moment, I thought I had somehow purchased the wrong game. But as the lengthy prologue progressed, it was very clear that this was most definitely a Yakuza game. It just needed to set up a little bit of the tale, starting with Arakawa Masumi - father figure and role-model for our erstwhile hero. It isn’t long before players are introduced to Kasuga Ichiban with his trademark ‘punch perm.’ Born in a soapland and raised by those that lived on the fringes of society, Ichiban, rather than being hardened by his experience, is empathetic and not afraid to show emotion. Tasked with collection, he interprets his orders in a way to benefit those that are struggling. His goofball attitude immediately makes him a character one can connect to. And it doesn’t hurt that he’s a bit of a nerd, having played Dragon Quest during his childhood and likening many of the people around him to things in the game.

It’s not long before the plot escalates and Ichiban volunteers to give himself up to the police. Sentenced to fifteen years in prison, he inadvertently extends his sentence when his Patriarch is insulted by one of the fellow inmates. After nearly two decades spent in prison for a crime that he did not commit, Ichiban is released with little fanfare and no waiting convoy. Disappointed, he takes it in stride. The first thing on his order of business: to get his signature punch perm and reconnect with his second father-figure and Patriarch of the Arakawa family.

Along the way, he is dogged by a former policeman: Adachi. At first, it isn’t made clear why Adachi seeks Ichiban for help. After all, Ichiban had supposedly killed another yakuza in Kamurocho, Tokyo. Adachi, on the other hand, was a detective in Yokohama. Why would he have any interest in uncovering the truth behind what had put Ichiban behind bars?

After a few shenanigans are had in and around Kamurocho, our protagonist is shot and left for dead - waking up in a homeless shelter in the heart of Isezaki Ijincho. Climbing his way from rock bottom, Ichiban embarks on a journey to uncover the truth, stumbling upon a series of events and unearthing a vast conspiracy in which he was to serve as a pawn.

Many of the earlier chapters felt a little contrived. In particular was the death of Nonomiya. While it served to move the narrative forward, it was most assuredly a means to an end that didn’t highlight any significant character growth. Poor Nonomiya was fridged just to bring Ichiban into conflict with the Liumang branch of the Ijin Three.

It was only in the later chapters that the story picked up steam - with the confrontations with Bleach Japan and the encroachment by the Omi Alliance. Joined by a menagerie of characters like Zhao, Saeko, Han Joon-Gi, Nanba and Eri, there was a lot to keep track on as the plot barrelled forward at a breakneck pace, connecting Ichiban’s past with his current present and all the while setting up a juicy conflict between two men that could have been brothers. And honestly, the ending with Arakawa Masato and Ichiban got to me. I loved how that Ichiban was finally able to reach his old charge by being vulnerable and finally letting out a little of his resentment at the life Masato led, despite the fact that he could not use his legs.

The characters were superbly written and their motivations were a good reflection of the human condition. The themes of family and finding a home were evident, right from the start, even though a lot of it was glossed over by Ichiban’s desire to be a hero in a video game.

(I also really liked Seong-hui and would love to see her be an actual playable character in possible future instalments. On a side note, Arakawa...you cannot simply say: ‘See you tomorrow, Ichi,’ and expect to walk away. You basically wrote your own name into the Death Note with that line!)

As far as aping Japanese role-playing games go, however, Yakuza: Like a Dragon falls woefully short. While the Tendo twist was a good one - it was pulled a little too early. Worse, there was no world-ending threat. Everyone knows that a Japanese role-playing game MUST HAVE A VILLAIN/ EVIL GOD FIGURE THAT INTENDS TO DESTROY THE WORLD. Yakuza: Like a Dragon was too focused on old childhood rivalries to extend it further afield. I mean, yes, Aoki Ryo hoped to pull the strings of the Japanese government as chair of the CLP, but WHERE WAS THE METEOR HURTLING TOWARDS EARTH? 

Honestly, 1/10 for holding true to Japanese role-playing games.

Other than that, the summons with Pound Mates was amusing. As were the side stories. Honestly, there can never be enough side stories to flesh out the wacky world of the Yakuza franchise. So many old favourites made their return. From Pocket Fighter (now dubbed Dragon Fighter) and Gondawara Susumu with his baby fetish.

Also, I didn’t think I’d be so obsessed with it, but I think they cracked property management this time round. Ichiban Confections, later known as Ichiban Holdings, was a blast to manage and accrue juicy money for.

The bartender of Survive also looked very familiar. I mean...what with the huge scar across his face. My suspicions were confirmed when I searched up Kashiwagi up on the Yakuza wiki page and was awarded with the fact that HE MANAGED TO SURVIVE THE ASSAULT HELICOPTER FROM YAKUZA 3!!

Other than that, my few other gripes involved the implementation of the levelling system and the way area of effect skills were handled. In particular, the pathing for how characters moved around the battlefield proved, at least to me, a bit of a frustration. Often, characters would be blocked by a knee-high fence or a corner. Sometimes they would be able to go around, but other times the game (after several seconds of watching them fail to walk through a solid building) warp to the enemy that I had targeted to launch their attack.

And even though the combat is turn-based, most of the enemies tend to walk around the battlefield - either clumping together or distancing themselves from each other. What truly annoyed me was when there were moves that could be used as an area of effect, with the MP cost to go along with it, but were limited by their effectiveness when the enemy combatants were too far away. Yes, it makes sense, but golly gosh, how much of a pixel measurement does it have to be for it to not hit?

Besides that, the levelling was also a bit of a tedious chore. Were it not for the invested vagrants, I feel like I might have put the game down with how much grinding there was - particularly when it came to the various jobs. The biggest hill to climb was from 20-30. Without the exp (experience point) boosting items, it would have been a torturous slog. I know that in the original Japanese release of the game, the cap for jobs was level 30, but if you change it to 99, please, for the sanity of all the gamers out there, tweak the requirements to make it easier. And maybe give normal trash mobs a bit more experience points for the playable characters to munch on. 

Goodness, imagine having to grind on level 55 Ornery Yakuza and receiving a paltry 1000xp for each battle (when, in order to level up a job, you needed almost a million).

Yakuza: Like a Dragon is a break from the traditional formula that’s been a staple of the franchise for many years. Much like Ichiban, it’s a bit of fresh air to liven up the experience that might have gone a bit stale after I slogged through the whole Kiryu arc last year. With a few tweaks, and a few more Persona 5 CD soundtracks, I’m eager to see how the story evolves and whatever contrivances Ichiban will somehow force him into.

Although, to be fair, is it still appropriate to call this franchise Yakuza when the game literally saw the dismantling of the two biggest clans? Then again, Civilian: Like a Dragon 2 just doesn’t have the same ring to it. In any case, I hope the next one comes soon and we’ll be able to have Seong-hui in our party. I feel like she’d be wielding a gunblade.

(Did I just use a lyric from Mariah Carey? You bet I did! I had been tossing up the idea between this line and ‘I need a hero.’ Why? Well, I think that would be self-explanatory after knowing Ichiban’s proclivities. And it fits so, so, so well!) 

[puroresu-musings]

NJPW G1 CLIMAX 30 Day 5 Review (Sept 27th, 2020, Kobe World Memorial Hall)

Yota Tsuji vs. Gabriel Kidd  ***

A Block

Taichi vs. Yujiro Takahashi  **1/2

Jeff Cobb vs. Minoru Suzuki  ***1/4+

Kota Ibushi vs. Tomohiro Ishii  ****1/4

Will Ospreay vs. Shingo Takagi  ****1/2+

Kazuchika Okada vs. Jay White  ***3/4

photos.

This was one of the strongest cards of the tour on paper, and whilst it didn’t exactly reach its lofty anticipation, it was still a great show which was a breeze to sit through. Gabriel Kidd defeated Yota Tsuji in the prerequisite good Young Lion opener with his impressive Butterfly Suplex, which then gave us a match I was dreading in Taichi vs. Yujiro. However, I’m pleased to say that whilst this wasn’t especially good, it certainly wasn’t bad, so thats a definite plus. The crowd were into this late in the game, before Taichi hit a low blow, then scored the win in 11 minutes with the Gedo Clutch. The win makes Taichi undefeated thus far, but I can’t believe that will last much longer. Especially seeing who he’s got coming up in the rest of this thing. Hey, does anyone remember when Shelton Benjamin went on that inexplicable undefeated streak in 2014?

Minoru Suzuki defeated Jeff Cobb next in a match up that, whilst very good, was something of a disappointment (a theme will occur). It was very short for starters (9:24), and Cobb, who really hasn’t looked all that great in this tournament so far, sold for pretty much the whole match. Which is something he does entirely too much for my liking. I mean, he’s a big, athletic guy, who was a legitimate Olympian, and could probably shoot kill most guys in most locker rooms, but spends most of these matches getting his arse handed to him. I mean, fine when you’re talking about Suzuki, but would Dr Death have bumped all over and sold 80% of a match for Taichi? Would the Steiners? Or Kurt Angle? Anyway, you get what I’m saying. I just think he needs to come across more as a badass shooter rather than... whatever he is now. Which is literally “just a guy”. Regardless of my gripes, this was a good match (even if there were a few ‘clunky’ aspects), which Suzuki won after locking in a choke then transitioning to the Gotch Piledriver.

After a brief intermission it was time to go to war as Ibushi took on Ishii. These guys have had three matches previous to this, all of which were absolutely fab, so expectations were high. This was an excellent, heated, hard-hitting battle, but for various reasons, it couldn’t hit the heights of their previous bouts, and the most  obvious reason being that it’s incredibly hard to have an absolute blow-away classic in the current environment. Literally, there’s only been one in my book; the Naito/Tanahashi match from last week, and that’s it. Regardless, they still had a great match, beating the hell out of each other for 15:41 with hard chops, kicks, forearms headbutts and Lariats. Just as we’d all hoped they would. Ishii started chopping Ibushi in the throat, so Kota hit those scary throat punches in retaliation, then landed on his feet on a German attempt and scored a near fall with Boma Ye on the originators bestie. Ishii counters Kamigoye with headbutts, then a Lariat. They exchange hard strikes, Ibushi hits a high kick, then Kamigoye to take the 2 points and render Ishii winless in this G1. They continued beating each other up in the post match.

Next up was a rematch from the best match of 2019, when Shingo Takagi sought to avenge his BOSJ Finals loss to Will Ospreay. This really was a fantastic bout, but obviously couldn’t reach the heights of their match last year, but was easily MOTN, in the top 3 of this tournament so far, and amongst the best in the pandemic era. These guys work amazingly well together and it produces fairly amazing results. Their counter sequences alone are a thing of beauty. Ospreay got a near fall after a Corner to Corner dropkick and Shooting Star Press, before Shingo battled back with a Pumping Bomber and Made In Japan for near falls of his own. The Rampage Dragon hit his old Stay Dream middle rope Death Valley Bomb, but Ospreay kicks at 1. Shingo obliterates him with a Pumping Bomber which garners a near fall, and Last Of The Dragon follows, allowing Takagi to get his win back at the 22:03 mark. This was a really great match, and, look, people were tying themselves in knots trying to explain how Ospreay’s match with Ishii last week wasn’t very good (it was excellent), and I fear that these sort of views are because of how these people feel towards Ospreay personally. I’ve always tried to remove the person from the matches (I’ve often loved a Michael Elgin match, despite him being fundamentally loathsome in many regards), and thats my philosophy here. I get he’s a very divisive character, but he has great matches consistently. Anyway, thats all I have to say about that.

And in the main event, Jay White once again pinned Okada in a really good, though ultimately disappointing, encounter that couldn’t hope to follow its predecessor. Honestly, this Okada Cobra Clutch storyline is doing nothing for me. It’s even more alienating to me then the red-headed balloon bandit nonsense he had going on 2018. I understand the story they’re trying to tell; that Okada has ‘retired’ the Rainmaker in order to make this Cobra Clutch/Anaconda Vice thing his primary finish, and its all building to him using the Rainmaker again later down the road, but I just honestly don’t care. It just ruins the flow of his matches. You could work dramatic sequences around avoiding or getting out of a Rainmaker, or even trying to hit it, but this submission just isn’t hitting the same notes as far as I’m concerned. I’ve said since January that Okada just seems lost at sea when he’s not champion, and this is as glaringly obvious now as its ever been. White however has looked great since his COVID induced hiatus, and he looked really good in this one. This was marred slightly by too much Gedo involvement, who kept distracting Okada throughout. After Okada hit a Rolling Rainmaker, he locks the Clutch on for maybe the 7th time in the match, which prompted Gedo to distract Red Shoes whilst Jay hits a low blow (we’ve seen a ton of these in this G1 already, by the way, and we’re only five days in!), then tries for Blade Runner, but again gets caught in the Clutch. Dear Lord. White counters into a Sleeper Suplex, then hit Blade Runner to take the decisive win at 18:48. I mean, in terms of wins over Okada, this is almost as decisive as it gets. Switch Blade cut a promo in the post match, taunting the crowd and proclaiming the G1 to actually be the “Jay1″. 

NDT

[tekka-dan]

I was informed of some disturbing news today regarding my best favorite boy Sasuke Uchiha and what his ultimate outcome will be in Borutrash.

Tumblr deleted my first initial rant, so I had to sit down and write it again. Not to fret though, re-writing has given me some clarity and all of you are going to witness my first hand unresolved, but subsiding, rage with the way Borutrash has handled Sasuke Uchiha’s character.

For anyone that’s new to my blog, content, posts: I am heavily against Boruto [as a character, manga, story, concept, anime] so if you’re a fan person of this series and you don’t like disputes or negative opinions your cue to dip is here.

You’ve been warned. Moving on.

Starting off, those of us who remember Sasuke Uchiha from the older days of Naruto [part 1] can easily summarize his character in one word: avenger. As the storyline progressed Sasuke became more than a so-called avenger and he started to gain some heavy handed, much needed, development. If you can recall that much, you would also recall that Sasuke was the “oppositional” character in the earlier days of Naruto. Meaning, Sasuke was the character that didn’t abide by rules, he did whatever he needed to advance but it was for his own sake and decision. He joined the academy to avenge his clan and become stronger to defeat his brother. When he meets Orochimaru that opportunity [to become stronger] arose and he took the bait (eventually—lets forget the part where he was kidnapped against his will, tortured and then kidnapped again).

So with all of that being addressed for his character, Sasuke choosing to follow under Orichimaru’s footsteps, this made Sasuke enter the “antagonistic” role. The reason this role was important for Sasuke [as a character] is because we are given context for his motives outside of the sunshine protagonist. Sasuke knew what his goals and ambitions were from the very beginning and also from the beginning he was being overshadowed by a bumbling fool that couldn’t even throw out milk on time. Sasuke didn’t have time for that, so he fucking bounced like the cool kid he absolutely was. Being on the “dark side” gave depth to this shallow story because once Itachi Uchiha made his appearance, and his role in the black ops and being a double agent was revealed — suddenly this sunshine village with its sunshine protagonist isn’t all sunshine.

Sasuke leaving the village was the best thing he ever did in this series and he is one of the four main characters that had a vision that he never got to achieve and questions he never got answers to. When Sasuke left the village, we are only in the mindset of him as a person and what he’s trying to achieve. We aren’t in Konoha village where the Will of Fire exists, where “I don’t believe in letting comrades die” comes into play — no, fuck all of that, we are simply inside Sasuke Uchiha’s mind and all Sasuke Uchiha thinks about is murdering Itachi for killing his clan and wanting to understand why Itachi would murder his clan in the first place. These are concerns far more prevalent than doing stupid ninja tasks or whatever the fuck Konoha participated in since all they seem to do is evoke war, genocide and havoc. Nothing seemingly important happened in this village up until Sasuke departed and suddenly everyone gives a fuck about saving the last Uchiha.

I seriously wonder what the Third Hokage was thinking. He (and Danzō) coaxed an actual child/teenager (Itachi) to slaughter his own clan in order to silence their people and then they are surprised when the surviving member of that clan flees the village.

Like Konoha is full of fucking dumbasses I swear. So that’s why I’m glad Sasuke did leave and it was eventually at his own free will. That also ties into my next point.

Sasuke represented oppression. His entire clan represented oppression. Them standing up against the Konoha System represented oppression. And it isn’t enough that every single member of them dies, it’s last member flees the village, and he goes on to save the same village that oppressed him to then become fodder and succumbing to pointless death in the continuation series?

Let me repeat that: Sasuke represented oppression. Now they are silencing him - and everyone that came before or after him - forever. Eternity. They expect Sarada to carry on the Uchiha genes but we aren’t remembering that she’s only half. We are forgetting that she [somehow] learned about the massacre from books in a library. She hasn’t learned anything from Sasuke or Sakura themselves. Why is that? Because they are trying to silence it forever.

This entire series feels like some massive “fuck you” propaganda because it doesn’t sit well to me. The character that represented oppression, stands up against the system as the last remaining member who can do so, he’s beat down without given a single answer to the questions he poses and then he’s forced to atone for sins he didn’t commit / shouldn’t be apologizing for to then go on to have an offspring he wasn’t ready for to then be killed off?

Is it not enough to just admit you wanted Sasuke Uchiha around for shipping bait and to ensure his uchiha bloodline succeeds him? Because that’s what it is.

They don’t give a single shit about his character and if Naruto didn’t spend 400 of 500+ episodes chasing him to reiterate Sasukes importance than guess where Sasuke would’ve died?

The same place Itachi would have.

Sasuke Uchiha and Itachi Uchiha would’ve both fought to the death, not a single brother would’ve walked away from that. And you know what? This would’ve been an honor to him as a person and as a character. Because up until he faces Itachi his only goal was to defeat his brother and learn why he did what he did. Itachi told him (albeit on his death bed) but I assure you they would’ve wrapped Sasuke Uchiha’s character up then and there and let him perish along with Itachi.

But they didn’t. Why? Because they needed Naruto to beat him into submission. They needed Naruto to remind the audience why Sasuke was considered an antagonist and why leaving the village is forbidden. They needed Naruto to brag about becoming hokage to preach about saving everyone, except the “everyone” excludes every single slaughtered and slain / deceased member of the Uchiha Clan, you know, the only people that ever truly mattered to Sasuke. Nah but it’s alright, sunshine protagonist Naruto needs Sasuke around to remind Sasuke that “he knows how he feels” and “believing in his word can make everything better”.

What makes matters worse about them killing Sasuke who represented oppression after they killed and degraded his character is that other characters who opposed the system were killed off long before their characters could be succeeded or milked.

Example 1: Yahiko / Pein.

Everyone knows what became of Pein and everyone is aware of the Yahiko that existed before the Pein. Everyone knows that Yahiko was the Naruto of his village, wanting to make a difference and have the world be a better place. Except, when the poor young sap tried to achieve this goal, he was killed tragically during an incident that was incredible miscommunication. Dying at the hands of his friend is what was supposed to make that moment less painful but it only sparked the rage in what became the Pein we all knew that destroyed Konoha.

Pein / Yahiko was the embodiment of oppression.

Everyone knows how that played out, I don’t need to repeat the entire chapter and how the questions Pein asked Naruto were never answered, rather he was given a mediocre bullshit half ass speech that made him surrender and sacrifice himself.

Example 2: Neji Hyuuga

Before Naruto’s dreams were drilled over and over into our heads, there was Neji who represented oppression in a literal sense, preaching it to his cousin during their battle and then to Naruto during theirs.

When Neji was killed off, people were upset because his character died for nothing without atoning for a single damn thing. Neji was born a slave and died a slave and we are supposed to believe (and be happy) that during death he was free.

Is this what people expect for these characters? That only in death can they find peace, freedom or happiness? What a pathetic and crippling message that presents.

You see the picture I am painting here? It’s not looking too good, is it? There’s a fucking pattern to it, that’s why. The only difference with Sasuke Uchiha is that his bloodline was extinct so they needed someone to carry it on. Pein (who was Nagato) is an Uzumaki so his bloodline continued. Neji is a Hyuuga and his bloodline continued. Sasuke is the only one who hadn’t and they couldn’t do away with his character until they had a certain someone he could procreate with, regardless if they had a lick of chemistry.

I’m not saying you can’t kill off characters from stories, sometimes characters do need to die, eventually they will anyway. However there are better ways to kill your characters and writing stories that don’t disregard their pasts or completely ravage their futures.

Sasuke’s entire history is being erased and everyone else who represents the same thing were also erased.

When Hinata speaks about Neji (if she does?) does she talk about the hierarchy and what it did to him and his father to her kids? No, because they want to forget about it, they are ashamed of it so they hide these facts.

When Naruto speaks to Boruto (if he does?) does he mention Nagato or even Jiraiya? Does he talk about his former sensei enduring a war, taking on an orphaned group of three and then having to return to their village being slain? Does he talk about the brutal systems the other villages carry on? Again, no. Because these are things they are ashamed of, they want to never have be mentioned or brought up again.

Those who don’t know their history are bound to repeat it, as the old saying goes.

What makes this worse for Sasukes character after death is that his reunion with his “family” feels cheap and downplayed. The only character trait they knew how to write for his character is to be distant and/or absent. Because of that Sasuke never “grew” on Sarada. I think that’s unfair as fuck to do to him, they already robbed him of everything else and even prior to death he can’t just simply be a fucking father.

How goddamn sad is that?

I gritted my teeth at Sasukes end in Naruto 699 but hearing the news about the current predictions / fate of his character has left me with unresolved despise for this series all over again.

It’s not enough that they keep taking everything from him, now he gets to die the same way he feels: empty..

First they killed his dream, then they killed his spirit and now they are killing his character.

[siirkaian]

its about time i actually started designing the antagonists instead of just daydreaming about where the protags occasionally meet them

i dont generally put warnings here but. some talk of suicide below def. worth the heads up............ the read more is just because its Fucking Long tho lmao

this one has actually been slightly fleshed out in my mind? they dont have a name yet, and its hard to know what Rank they are since ive been moving the story away from violence and A Coming War for a few reasons, most recent one being my friends story (tho they dont know about mine) has gone down the route of having a war at the end.. mostly tho i want to explore telling a good and worthwhile story without a focus on just who can beat up the other team better. The main protag Barren, for example, im bringing down the route of using their visions and ability to see inside peoples minds (in cryptic, symbolic landscapes and stuff) to take down people from the inside out, generally by working through their reasoning and traumas and whatnot to enable them to see clearer and with more empowerment........  and then one protag (Kindle) who joins later knows how to fight, and the third protag (Stardust) keeps them out of trouble, but later reveals that, well, spoilers that have already been seen a million times, hes actually one of the gods who fought in the huge war that happened in the past, and when thats revealed its when he has to fight again but......... he avoids it due to carrying the trauma and issues surrounding that war, as well as his own virulent self doubt and self hatred. so. this character to get back to the point? Wouldve been like a general or something, but im not sure how far I want to take them away from that, maybe to being a high priestex or something? the gods are supremely important to the story, and, spoilers, the main goal of the main antagonist is to bring back the original creator deity of the world, Siirka

I actually have a lot of appreciation for this particular antagonist character, they werent involved with Barren’s mistreatment when Barren was raised in their city by their masters so..... Theyre very much blinded to whats going on, I guess when youre raised in a city which glorifies what the leaders are doing and you get the chance to work for them, and you havent seen the depths of their evil youre going to work extra hard and...... push little red flags out of your mind............ They were extremely loyal and fully or. Mostly. on board with everything happening that they were told about, and worked super fuckin hard to get to the rank theyre at, always pushing boundaries and training and improving and grasping for any sort of genuine praise and signs theyre doing good that they can get, wanting to do their absolute best for the cause and. be worth something to someone. it gets very obsessive, especially as doubts and red flags start actually encroaching on their goals

As Barren and co start causing more trouble, this character’s storyline actually develops separate to the protags. Definitely influenced by them and their continuous defying of the antagonists, which doesnt plant seeds in their mind but waters the ones that are there....... They start realising things arent as peachy and golden as everyone was teaching them it was, they realise their betters either dont really know what theyre doing or may have selfish intentions, or, god forbid, intentions that could land everyone in a fucktonne of trouble - basically all the views they were raised on start having major cracks and Plot Holes in them and they have to come to terms with that. They do a lot of inner work struggling both with their crumbling view of reality and with the fight between either breaking it down more or trying to patch it up with lies, the sort of lies that even the person telling them doesnt know are lies. They get more and more frantic, more detached from reality as much as they try to hold on, struggling with their own identity and with dissociation, and with their mental state unravelling under stress and the inversion of what they were taught as right being morally dangerous, and what they were told to hate being morally good, until finally their boss is killed to further the protag’s goals......... before the protagonists can get to him............ by them. and then they end their own life to prevent themselves being tortured and imprisoned by their masters. I had a scene in mind where the protag’s spend a little arc trying to get to him because they need to take him out, and this character knows theyre coming, so the protags finally get to him at night and find him dead with this character standing over him. They get a brief chat before telling the protags to run, that theyll take the blame for it and the protags will get away without being harmed if they go quick enough, and then they step out of the window BUT its very fuckin important that its made clear that theyre left with no choice - or, more importantly, that theyve finally made their own moral choice in life with their own mind and own feelings - that theyre in their right mind/not acting on despair and need to go before theyre captured - both for theirself but also so they cant be interrogated and have no chance to spill that the protags were there. They basically redeem all the bloodshed and indoctrination theyve had a hand in - and oh, i forgot this bit of important context. Because of the whole staying away from violence thing, they do it to redeem themselves, to stop at least their boss spreading anymore shit, partially also to get revenge for all the lies and stuff, but also importantly because they dont want that on the protag’s conscious. They can handle it, and since they intend to die, they will bring it to their own grave. Death happens rarely in the story, because I want it to be as heavy and serious and soul-destroying as it is irl. They do the traumatising act of having to kill someone and live with the blame because theyve already planned out that they’re going to die to avoid capture. 

Im really.......... wary of portraying suicide in Siirkaia but given Stardust is heavily implied to be back from the dead (having the god of death, Mercy’s, black hair which only he has, though for most of the story its ambiguous as to whether hes working for or is Mercy ((its neither they were lovers lmao))) and Barren and Kindle’s mother Inferno also killed herself its............... im just gonna have to cave and realise im gonna need to address it. I mean, the protags already show (as being the grandchildren/children of and a suicide victim) that its a fuckin tragedy not a solution to anything, but, look. the story is intricately tied to my own mental health and thats shit ive dealt with for years so its going in the melting pot baybey! Also. as if i will EVER write this....... but i still want however i portray it to make clear that..... its a fuckin tragedy and honestly Not The Right Choice IMO

Basically, as a character theyre very hardworking, very Very ambitious, slightly obsessive, and i guess Unhinged because oh boy i am just giving out free personal issues to these characters huh. Their story is ideally going to be a bit more fleshed out than the other antags, because theyre meant to be a bit of the protags in that side of the story. Theyre like.... a case study in the complex and not black/white concept of redemption. The Demos, the people of the story, are at their core defined by submission and being led to terrible things. They were all originally created by the terrible god of life and chaos Siirka to be entertainment. Siirka had passed by Earth and took a liking to the pain and suffering of humanity, specifically loving the way they scream, and so built a fake Earth out of his own substance/power (in universe his body and hair) that was an unoriginal almost exact copy of Earth with.... absent details, like all the animal species being just identical copies of one example of each species, in all white, and a submissive race that looked like humans so that he could rule over them..... The Demos have since been taken from Siirka’s reign, since Siirka was banished in a war by Mercy and the trio of Stardust/Moonshine/Midnight (Siirkaia until i change it roughly translating to “Siirka’s absence”/”no Siirka”/etc), but its still central to the story of the world that the Demos are susceptible to being taken advantage of - though strangely they arent Super different to humans - and to being oppressed, since thats what they were made to be............. Like, Cool Backstory Bro, but its central to everything, it represents whats happening now both metaphorically and literally, the race thats susceptible to being betrayed and used is now starting to be betrayed and used again. Cycles of abuse continuing, learning the worth of the spirit, thats all the story of Siirkaia. The protags of the story represent the spreading empowerment, thats what Mercy gave to the Demos, the power to choose, to exist, to create your own path........ And this character represents that right to choose. Theyre a flower beginning to bloom in a garden full of frost. Theyre hope, and hope taking root and being received and acted on, showing that even if your actions just help one person they were worthwhile. Of course other Demos receive that enlightenment, but this character represents the hope in the Demos, but also the “good” in the “evil”, that, while most of the antagonists’ actions are unforgivable at worst and in no way exempt from criticism at best, theres a reason people are driven to do evil things, and theres a lot of corruption of the mind and personality that happens to drive people to those points. People can act in horrible ways, but its always for a reason, whether its their own trauma or not....  Even “I wanted to” has heavy implications of reasons behind it. This character is one of the few that did the work to begin to escape the cycles they were born into and its important they have their part in the story be heard

as much as i want them to be understood by everyone, as a schizotypal person i see that most people............ do not even try to Start understand people they find slightly odd, so making them “understandably mad” as in showing them show some of the Odd traits of being detached from reality/humanity with the reasons those things come about, and, you know, with the appreciation that its not just “ooo crazy random, unpredictable, youll never know what theyll do next!!” its....... actions that just seem different to those who dont do those actions..... Either way, however i push their character in regards to being misunderstood, i really want their end to be understood, or rather. I want them to be understood in the end. Barren can be incredibly empathetic and understanding, id really love for their final moments to be..... mutual? They did what had to be done for things to change and get better, and in the moments where they meet Barren/Kindle/SD, they finally get seen for what they are, they finally get seen as an entity beyond all the lies pushed onto them, a person who was led astray, who had the goodness in their heart and found the strength to multiply it, to try and right their wrongs, who was, although it looks on the outside like they had it all, actually been manipulated and mistreated by their higher ups and used as a pawn so they didnt have to get their hands dirty, they could just pass on the work to someone else. I really want them to, while they cant really be redeemed because of the damage thats been done, have a few moments of actual peace at the end of their story

.............................or maybe they could run away with the main trio lmao but no, that cant........ really happen because of the important dynamics and the personal (as in interpersonal not about me) nature of the protags and also. while i want the Demos to be revived again at the end, they do get swept away into Siirka’s hair when hes brought back through the big boss of the antags, Ka-UrenKa-, oo spoilers. so. i dont really know if i want to kill a protagonist it seems cheap (the main trio survive because they werent made by siirka........... literally a long fuckin story) because. at current, Siirka being brought back happens out of nowhere, and while the audience technically know its coming should they piece together the symbolism of Barren’s visions, its supposed to be unexpected and. idk man. 

anything else? Oh yeah i think they were originally conceptually conceived to Brutus by the Buttress so you fucking KNOW that i couldve skipped ALL this writing just to put that song in but hey. i would say its their theme song but while inspo was taken from theme and lyrics its actually not accurate to their life beyond a few lines?? and also the overall fucking Mood