#i will be seeing alternate selves tonight

[to-shards-you-say]

good morning cosmere tumblr its my 25th birthday and i've been gifted a bottle of nonspecific alcohol with metal flakes in it. they got me the mistborn booze

[hxxsxxng]

the thing about roommate jake is…

pairing : roommate!jake x fem!reader ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡.• mdni

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡.•

roommate jake is ALWAYS craving physical touch. he is always coming up with excuses to be in your room, cuddled with you in your bed. some nights it was an innocent reason like he was ‘washing his bedding’ or ‘it was too cold in his room’. but the vast majority of nights, it was for a more sexual reason. he would wrap his arm around your waist, sliding under your shirt to cup your chest while he nuzzeled his face into the back of your neck. just scooting a little closer, you could feel the tent in his pants pressing against your ass. “jake!” you sighed. “whaaaat, babydoll?” he acted oblivious.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡.•

roommate jake would browse online to find the lingerie he thinks you would look perfect in and wraps it up and leave for you for when you got home. he leaves a cutely wrapped gift box on your pillow as a supprise. some times he would leave a card with it too, reading things like “you looked so beautiful tonight” or “i miss you”.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡.•

the only way you could ever repay jake for buying you such expensive gifts was letting him see you wear it. this is probably why he liked spending so much time in your room, you doing little fashion shows for all of the sets he has bought you. eventually, when the pressure in his pants builds up enough from viewing each of your outfits, he would throw you on the bed, and tear it right back off of you. each night that he left the presents, you sent a little thank you photo of you wearing it. different poses flattering each different set that he bought, he kept a folder of your ‘try on’ photos in his camera roll.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡.•

roommate jake makes sure you are taken care of. he hated seeing you sick, or in pain. he had a pretty good immune system, but you on the other hand, got a sinus infection practically every week in the winter. he would make sure you had warm soup brought to your room every night along with some antibiotics. he would sit on the edge of your bed and graze your legs with his fingers, trying to distract you from your uncomfortableness. or maybe he would lay in the bed next to you, brushing your hair behind your ear, admiring you while you spoke. sometimes doctor jake would suggest engaging in alternate treatment methods as well.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡.•

he is very handsy but is also careful when touching your body. though jake has done these things a thousand times over, he will still ask if it is okay every. single. time. he is a gentle lover, he likes the little things. wrapping his hand around your waist when y’all are grocery shopping. gripping your thigh when his is driving. they are all little reminders how much you drive him crazy. on those nights when he has found himself in your bed, instead of kissing you senseless, he would gently trace your skin with his calloused fingertips, and press soft kisses to your jawline and neck. he couldn’t keep his hands to himself.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡.•

roommate jake has an oral fixation. he loves biting and sucking on any of your body parts that he can. but his favorite was definitely your nipples. he would effortlessly swipe his tongue across them while having his eyes closed, humming with contentment. he was patient and slow. jake wasn’t one of those men who were quick to jump into bed. he preferred to explore you first, before diving in headfirst. it gave him the chance to savor your reactions and focus on your pleasure, rather than his own.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡.•

roommate jake loves cooking with you. him in the kitchen with his selves half rolled up, and your cute little maroon apron was so adorable. you were never really the greatest cook, so jake took pride in the fact that he was your own personal cooking tutor. he stands behind you with his chest pressed against your back, and guides your hands measuring each ingredient, like a marionette. he would lean down and smell your vanilla scented hair and leave kisses on the side of your neck while you attempted his recipies.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡.•

taglist : @jakeflvrz

inspo from : @heeseungsbm ��

[blue-blue-blooms]

A Little Crush   

Eddie Munson x Henderson!Reader

Part 1

Summary: In which Eddie develops a crush on the Henderson sister.

You weren't sure exactly when your life had gone to absolute shit. Was it when you found a strange, superpowered adolescent girl living in Mike Wheeler's basement? Was it when you walked in on a baby demogorgan eating your cat? Or was it when you were drugged by evil Russians operating under Starcourt Mall? You couldn't even remember a time when life was normal. If someone had told you that you would become best friends with Steve 'The Hair' Harrington and fight literal monsters from an alternate universe alongside Nancy Wheeler and Jonathan 'The Creep' Byers a few years ago, you would've laughed in their face. Now? You'd survived the most traumatising events of your life alongside these people. You were bonded for life.

The last few years had also made you closer with Dustin. You loved your baby brother and his weird friends, especially since you'd spent so much time babysitting them. But no amount of love could make you say yes to what they were asking of you.

"Please?" Dustin begged, following you down the hallway as you made your way to Ms. O'Connell's class.

"No! I have, like, three essays due this week, Dustin. I don't have the time to sub." You respond.

"It's only for tonight! Lucas can't make it and we really need a sub. We're nearly done with the campaign and Eddie will kill us if we make him reschedule!" Dustin pleads.

You were really happy that Dustin and Mike had found a safe space in high school. Lord knows those two idiots needed it. Freshmen year is probably the toughest of them all. You're new, scared, and lonely. You were really glad that they'd found friends, a place where they could be their nerdy selves and feel accepted. Hell, even you'd dabbled in their interests when you'd babysat them. DnD wasn't half bad, and not nearly as hard to undertand as you once thought. You'd spent many nights in Mike's basement playing with them. The first few times, you'd get your character killed in the first fifteen minutes. But after a while, you started making progress (even though you're convinced that the party was exceptionally lenient with you after you once burst into tears over getting killed off).

"I'll do your half of the chores for a week!" Dustin exclaims.

That makes you stop.

"A week?" You turn around to look at him, "Make it two weeks and I'll sub."

"Two? Are you insane!?" Dustin yells, making a few people lingering in the hallway turn and look at you both.

"Two or no deal, Dusty Buns," You tease, "And be quick, I'm late for my class."

"Fine!" Dustin says, "And stop calling me 'Dusty Buns'"

"Why? Is that nickname just for Suzy Poo?" You tease.

Dustin glowers at you as you walk off.

♡♡♡

"So, who's the DM?" You ask as you walk alongside Dustin and Mike.

"It's Eddie, Eddie Munson. He's a senior. Long hair, wears a hellfire T-Shirt, I talk about him constantly. God, do you ever listen to me?" Dustin claims exasperatedly.

"Oh! Eddie as in your new favorite older male best friend who Steve's weirdly jealous of?" You ask, "I've seen him around. Is he the one who jumps on lunch tables and yells a lot?"

"Yup." Mike responded, "He's a bit scary when he's revved up. Just warning you beforehand in case he comes off...a bit intimidating."

You nod.

"Hasn't he been held back, like, three times?" You ask.

Before either of the boys could answer, you reach the room. The first thing you see is the table where the game is set. There are three boys sat around, all with Hellfire T-Shirts on. Your eyes fleet from one to the other until finally landing on Eddie. You recognise him immediately from the amount of times you've seen him yelling in the cafeteria.

Dustin and Mike failed to mention how cute he was, you think.

His hair was long and wavy. He was wearing multiple rings. And he was covered in tattoos. You're pretty sure you saw a few bats peeking from under his sleeve.

"Who's this?" One of the guys asks, making all three turn around and look at you.

"This is Y/N! She's subbing for Lucas!" Mike says, the words spilling out fast and nervously.

Why the hell are they so jittery?

"Yeah, she's my sister! The one I mentioned a couple days ago." Dustin adds.

"Does she even know how to play DnD?" The other boy asks.

"Okay, excuse me, I wouldn't have come if I didn't know how to play," You finally speak, waving your hand a little to get their attention.

"So, this is your infamous sister?" Eddie finally speaks, his eyes landing on you, "You know, I thought he made you up. What's your class and level? Level One Elf?"

Elf? Is he mocking me?

"Are you mocking me?" You ask incredously.

"Is he mocking me?" you turn towards Dustin and Mike who immediately start gesticulating, probably asking you to shut up.

"My name is Aeren Sirenfall and I'm a level 14 chaotic good half-elf rogue. I will sneak behind any monster you throw my way and stab them in the back with my poison-soaked kukri. And I'll smile as I watch them die a slow...agonising...death." You say, your voice slow and hard as you glare at Eddie, "So, are we gonna play this stupid game or not?"

You're pretty sure you hear one of the boys mutter a 'she's terrifying' to Dustin.

You watch as Eddie's eyes slowly soften and a grin emerges on his face, "Welcome to Hellfire Club."

[afyrian]

ch. 9 - march 10 masterlist

    rin lays down on the couch, his broken foot propped up on a pillow. headphones rest over his ears as he scrolls through instragram on his phone. you continuously peek over at him as you finish up ordering pizza for dinner. it's hard for you every time you catch a glance at the boot on his foot, or the cut on his forehead. always feeling guilty about it.

  to the point where the both of you don't hang out as much. you don't watch movies together or play video games over stream anymore. the house is divided and you don't want to end up like romeo and juliet.

  therefore, you figured tonight would be the night you finally fix it. you'll get over the anxieties you have surrounding what happened and you'll also give him pizza. which can only result in a positive outcome. "it is ordered and i have the perfect movie that we can watch," you walk over to where he’s laying, sitting on the floor in front of the couch.

  "you can sit on the couch if you want-" he pulls off his headphones, setting down his phone.

  you shake your head, shrugging your shoulders in his direction. "it's fine rin, you need the room for the foot and everything and i want you to heal properly," you shrug your shoulders, grabbing the remote from the coffee table.

  "well i could just move it to the coffee table," rintarō blinks a couple times, already feeling your guilt.

  awkwardly, you turn on the television, taking in a deep breath. of course his example is a viable alternative, but making him move could possibly be hurting him. or if the coffee table isn't high enough for blood to flow properly, it could damage him further, "yeah.. yeah, but i just want to make sure that you'll- it'll be okay."

  rin tilts his head, letting out a sigh, "what did i say when all of this happened? didn't i say that this isn't your fault? none of it is. and if you don't sit down on his couch and watch a movie with me, then i will eat all of your pizza."

  his tone clearly becomes lighthearted at the end. his eyebrow raising in a suspiciously mischievous manner, arms crossing in front of his chest. "you'll eat all my pizza?" you narrow your eyes, pursing your lips.

  "yeah, i get that you're worried. that you feel guilty, i can see it on your face every day," rin pauses for a moment, sitting up in his spot, "but it's not your fault, it can't be. because you have every right to leave a party early. and honestly, if we were both hurt in an accident, if you were.."

  very little gets rintarō to become emotional. the only times you having ever seen him cry are at family events or when he played volleyball. so seeing him looking away from you as he swallows a thick ball of mucus nearly sends you into a crying fit. "if you were hurt, i don't know what i would've done. so come sit next to me, let's watch a movie and you have to get over the whole guilt thing. or i'll eat your pizza."

  "you know you give great prep talks for such a stone face,” you grab the pillow from under his foot, moving his leg as well before sitting down, resting both of them on your lap. 

  “stone face? what are you even talking about?”

  “you have such a resting bitch face! you do know that right? like even when we were kids you would-” you continue talking, finally feeling a little normal again, back to your old selves.

a/n: shorter than i would’ve liked, but not bad!

[darling-i-read-it]

Would you be willing to maybe write Giles headcanons from btvs. Like about his love languages and how it would go? Much love 💕! Please and thank you ☺️.

angel? spike? no. giles. it'll always be giles. (ps thank you for this request im knee deep in watching buffy so this is on my mind lots)

this is love language headcanons or alternatively: different scenarios in giles house. (gentle warning for some insinuating jokes lol)

acts of service

Giles appreciates when other people do things without him having to ask. He's very used to be in charge and likes that position; it makes him feel important

but goddamnit it sure would be nice for someone else to shoulder the weight. it would be double nice if it was someone other than buffy who also never gets a damn break.

it also doesn't have to be big things. Setting the tea bags out for him, buying the kind he likes when he's low.

Bringing him books you think he'll like or putting away the ones he had left out.

This also goes for things like helping research or helping Buffy if she needs it. A lot of his life is surrounding helping her so if you help as well it takes some of the pressure of his shoulders.

Giles ran his hand through his hair as he left the bedroom. You had stayed over the night before but weren't in bed when his alarm clock went off. He looked around the corner, seeing only himself in the mirror coming down the stairs. He wanted to call out your name but didn't, out of sheer exhaustion.

When he emerged into the living room he could hear you. You were in the kitchen, gently humming to yourself. His eyes opened wide, the sleep leaving them, when he saw you.

"Mornin sleepy head. You forget to turn your alarm off?" He gave you a confused look. "It's a holiday today. No school." He looked back up the stairs, trying to find what day it was in his head.

"Why are you awake then?"

"Couldn't sleep." His eyes drifted down to your hands. You were making breakfast. You had pancakes on the counter already made. Bacon was sizzling.

"Breakfast?"

"Figured it was the least I could do. You were so generous last night," you teased. He smiled, shaking his head.

"This..this is a lot of bacon." There was a whole stack already made.

"I figured your scoobies were going to be stopping by sometime this morning with a problem. Don't want them to starve." His eyes floated to your face with the most adoring look. You met his gaze. "You okay?"

"I love you. I love you so much."

quality time

Giles doesn't have a lot of free time, at least not in the first few seasons. He was technically always running around and doing something with the library or with Buffy or with the council. Constantly stuck within a losing battle of his free time and his sanity.

Spending all the time he could with those he loves and appreciates is important to him. He attempts to make time.

It's just...not easy.

It isn't actually his fault necessarily but yeah...he can barely finish a book for pleasure.

But when he has that time he does not like to waste it.

"I've taken the phone off the hook," Giles announced. You looked up from the couch where you were sitting. He looked quite proud. "Buffy is patrolling with Angel. She'll be safe for the night."

"You don't have to convince me," you told him.

"I know. I was convincing me." You gave him a sly smile. He sat down beside you. He had a stack of books in front of him on the coffee table. You were cuddled up in the corner of the couch with a blanket and a mug. "Has your tea gone cold?"

You shook your head, no.

"Good." He picked up the stack of books and rested them on his lap. You watched him with big heart eyes. He was about to talk about something he was extremely passionate about. You were excited to listen.

"Which one are you going to read to me tonight Rupert?"

"I have options."

"Naturally."

physical touch

we all saw the episode where they reverted to their teenage selves

growing up, Giles had the tendency to be handsy in relationships. That wasn't something that exactly faded away as he grew older, he just became slightly better at hiding it

It was something you were surprised about when you started a relationship with him but it was something that was simple to ease into. It became natural fast

He likes to have his hands on you whenever you're alone. the whole time. all the time.

in public he's okay, he's sophisticated, he's borderline shy/timid. He does not want to traumatize the children he is constantly around. Even when Xander makes joke after joke after joke after jo-

Will pull you aside privately if he feels the need to though. Stern talking to. You look too good. That's literally not his fault.

but ALONEEEEEE

"Rupert," you muttered. He had his arm wrapped around you tightly from behind as you sat on the couch. He had his book up but was holding it with one hand. Everytime he turned the page he would set the book down and turn it so he didn't have to take his hand off you.

"Yes?" he questioned. You looked up at him. You sat between his legs, your back flush with his chest.

"I need to go to the bathroom," you said. He raised his eyebrows, floating his gaze back to his book.

"Can it wait?" You laughed.

"No." He let out a hearty sigh as though you had just told him grave news.

He moved his arm off you so you could get up.

"Hurry back," he said. You smiled, face scrunching. The warmth in your chest expanded out towards to your face as you walked away.

"I'm hurrying."

[beautifulpersonpeach]

I'm so full. I'm so happy. This is everything that I wanted for the tannies. It's so amazing. Never mind its 144p and I'm still learning the lyrics. I had such a blast! Jimin was so cute. Yoongi was so funny and cute and sexy and awesome and just,,, just,,, JUST!!! Couldn't stop grinning while watching their wlive and burst out laughing as Yoongi ended it so abruptly. lol Love you, Yoongi. Love them. Who's doing it like them? Have you seen the Tiffany crowd? Have you seen the concert crowd?!!?

***

It’s a different sort of high being a fan of BTS, isn’t it?

It’s a different sort of joy seeing them be their remarkable, awe-inspiring and goofy selves. It’s so beautiful to see the love they so clearly have for each other. It feels a little too intimate sometimes, and in my experience, this is a feeling that’s unique to BTS. This group is very special. What they’ve got feels genuine because it is.

Jimin was vibing hard. Yoongi’s performance felt electric from start to finish. They spent time together, [*]riding to the venue and leaving afterwards. Its clear as day that Yoongi is happy Jimin is with him, and Jimin wears the respect and love for his hyung on his face. It’s just so easy with them.

And can I just mention Yoongi’s energy during tonight’s concert?

The way he attacked HUH?!

AGUST D???

Christ.

It’s like he gets stronger, wilder, every concert… lol, like I suspected, he’s already a bit too good at this. I’m gonna need him to calm down before the Cali dates. And now that we know we’re getting Tony Montana at a future date, I think we’re all going to really learn to pace ourselves. This could get crazy before long.

Because we’re only three days in and I’m already hanging on by a thread.

What he’s doing to me with these performances cannot be written on the internet.

He fucks me up so bad y’all.

Let me go on a short tangent here:

STD is an acronym that’s known in Korea to mean what you think it means. Everybody knows it. Language isn’t a barrier in this case. When people in Korea hear “STD”? They know what it’s referring to.

Now, what do you think about the way Yoongi introduced his alternate persona: AGUST D in 2016? The way he enunciates that phrase is sickening and intentional. The very mention of his name in the mouths of his detractors is a sickness they get from him fucking them. Or ‘fat dicking’ them, to quote Yoongi. And on that song he spits one of the sickest bars of his entire career. You’re guaranteed to be fucked just by hearing it. I mean just in his name there’s already triple entendres.

It’s mad.

Yoongi has a very peculiar energy. It’s very catlike, but also serpentine and there’s an undercurrent of barely restrained lunacy deep beneath the surface. Hobi is actually more crude than Yoongi in speech and flow, but Yoongi can be so cruel. And that quality, one he doesn’t shy from turning on himself too, coupled with his pragmatic and caustic delivery… lord. He sets himself apart from every other artist alive. Nobody in BTS cuts to the bullshit faster than Yoongi - he’s lived through the consequences of deluding yourself that you’re okay when you’re not. He’s a man who is constantly examining himself, checking his worst tendencies, but never compromising on what he truly believes.

Ugh.

Times like tonight, I look at BTS and feel so much calm. They are so competent, and I’m certain whatever they make, it will be very good. Yoongi has proven that so far with this tour. Yoongi’s D-DAY concert tour is easily the best solo concerts I’ve been to this decade, and I haven’t even attended one yet. But it’s easily the best one. Easily. And I’ve been to a lot (actually been to them), especially in the last 12 months.

That crowd Jimin pulled for the Tiffany’s event is no joke. We’re now at the point where Western celerities know they’re not the main popularity driver if Jimin is also involved. They know the crowds are there for Jimin. And when he eventually showed up, he looked magnificent. Elegant. Polished. Understated. One of these days I want to see Jimin bejewelled and dressed in all primary colours - something more vibrant and queer. But that Tiffany’s event went for traditional and understated and that’s okay. It worked, because Jimin can work anything.

**

Edit [*]: Typo correction. Should include "after", meaning after arriving at and leaving the concert, Yoongi and Jimin spent time together. They arrived separately and left together, spent time together also before and after.

[widowwaddles]

Casualty of Love (Snippet)

Summary: The Scarlet Witch’s path to reunite with her kids was filled  with destruction. And now you must fan the flames in order to help your  family adjust to your new life afterward.

A what-if story continuing the aftermath of the Scarlet Witch's dream walking but of Wanda who had never awoken her powers. She is now plagued with the memories of her alternate's life. Would you be able to support your Wanda through this new journey or will you lose the Wanda you fell in love with in the process?

A/n: Excuse me as I just just drop this here and fade back into the background. Something short to test this idea out, let me know your thoughts.

Masterlist

The New Normal

Your slumber was interrupted by tossing and turning from beside you.

Your eyes burn as you open them. It’s a struggle to keep them open, as your body desperately craves the one thing it’s gone without for the past month. Between the hotel rooms, family therapy sessions, and the legal repercussions of proving your wife’s innocence for the Scarlet Witch’s tirade, a good night's sleep became a luxury you could no longer afford. You craved the mundane normalcy that your life once had before She wrecked havoc in your lives. But a part of you knew that things could never go back to how they were, and that was a grieving process in itself. It broke your heart to look at your family every morning and all you see is a hollow shell of their former selves.

You felt useless for being unable to do anything as you saw your wife’s eyes become filled with a scarlet glow as she murdered those in her path. The woman who could never hurt a fly, disappearing from the house without a word and returning covered in blood with no memory of where she was or what she’d done. That moment should have been your first clue that something was wrong and you should have prepared for the worst, but as you held your shaking wife that night you couldn’t think of anything other than cleaning her up and making the tears stop. Her breaths finally evened out as she lay on your chest, the steady rhythm of your heart lulling her into sleep.

You hear Wanda begin to mutter in her sleep as her hands clench the sheets under her grasp. This was the third nightmare tonight.

“Wanda, baby” you call out softly.

“Please, don’t hurt them” she pleads, still trapped within the nightmare.

Sitting up, you turn on the lamp. Getting a better look at your wife, her face is in distress with sweat covering her forehead. You knew that you needed to wake her now. Shaking her body, you call out to her again. “We’re safe baby, please open your eyes for me”

This seems to do the trick and as she opens her eyes, you are greeted with a flicker of scarlet before they return back to green. The adrenaline from her nightmare still plaguing her body as her chest rises and falls with a quickness. Pulling her body into you until her head rests against your chest, you knew this was the only way to prevent the start of her panic attacks after these types of dreams.

“Detka” she cries out. “The boys, where are they? I need to find them”

She attempts to thrash away from your grip, but you don’t let her go. “They’re okay, I promise. Today’s a big day for them, remember it's their first day” You shush her, rocking your body as you remind her of the day’s schedule. School was the (reluctant) first step to gaining stability and normalcy in their lives. Silence fills the air, and when you felt her breaths calm down you thought she had fallen back to sleep once again.

“Y/N, please. I need to see my babies” she begs, her voice so small and broken.

“Okay,” you give in, knowing just how much she needs reassurance with her own eyes. “But, we can’t wake them or else they’ll never go back to bed,” you say lightly, in hopes of gaining a smile from Wanda but all you hear in response is Wanda rushing out of the room like a woman on a mission.

Sighing, you get out of bed and tread to the hallway. As you approach their room, you see Wanda is already sitting on the bed, slowly stroking Tommy’s cheek before moving to Billy’s. Ever since the incident, they’ve reverted to sleeping in the same bed again, in fear of one day waking up to the other being gone forever. As you enter, you approach the window that overlooks the beds and adjust the digital baby monitor you’ve had to purchase since moving into this new house. The boys are still adjusting to the new house and after the first night waking up to screams of horror, you both wanted to ensure their safety from the convenience of your room. You could still remember the glare you received from Wanda when you mentioned the idea of returning to your bedroom at night instead of sleeping with the twins for a night. You would have thought that you said the evilest thing in the world from the way she refused to speak to you for the rest of the day. It wasn’t until you brought it up again with their therapist that she had actually agreed it would be better to start the transition now that you were in a new city. Wanda was reluctant to agree but only under the condition that cameras were installed around the house in case something happens. You didn’t think that you needed to do something that drastic yet, so you both eventually compromised with the baby monitor. It hasn’t even been a full week yet, but the boys were handling it far better than you had expected. Ever since the move, they’ve taken things even better than you and Wanda had. It made your heart swell with love when you saw how peaceful and carefree they looked as they slept.

Wanda leans forwards, pressing a kiss onto each of their cheeks before standing up. She lets out a shaky breath, reaching out for your hand now that she’s been able to believe that her family was safe. You grab her hands and guide her back to your bedroom.

As you lay back down in bed, you could tell something was still preventing Wanda from fully relaxing again.

“What’s going on in that head of yours?”

“I… I don’t understand these dreams. It's a life that’s so different from mine, one without you or the boys. And it scares me so much” she confesses, her grip tightening on your hand. “I don’t know what I’d do if I ever lost this, lost you. Each night I’m reliving the same nightmare that always ends with me alone, with everyone around me dead”

You kiss her head and rub her back.

“What if she’s still inside of me? And I try to hurt you or the twins again, I would never forgive myself” she says frantically, working herself up again.

“Wanda look at me” you say firmly, before grabbing her hands. “We are safe, and you are safe. The tests have all confirmed that she is gone and she’ll never come back. You’re my wife, and the mother to the best kids in the world. I know you’ll never do anything to hurt our family. And I will never let anything happen to you or the boys, again” You speak with so much conviction that it springs tears in Wanda’s eyes.

“It won’t be easy but soon we’ll heal from this, and it’ll become a distant memory. Our love is strong enough to get through this, but you can’t bottle it all in. I need you to trust and let me be there for you for as long as it takes until it happens, you’re not alone and you’ll never be as long as I’m here”

“Okay,” she sobs out. “Don’t ever let go, I’m afraid of what I’ll become if you did. I can’t do this without you”

“Never. I’m not going anywhere” you promise.

You don’t remember how long you spent holding Wanda until all you heard was her soft snores. You look towards your alarm and instantly know that your time to rest has come to an end. You get up and begin preparing for the day, deciding to start with the kitchen knowing your wife would be happy to see it clean before she makes breakfast. It feels like your body has been moving on autopilot for the past month, and you had no idea how much longer you could sustain the current pace of your lives.

You have to fight the urge to break down every time you see the pain in their eyes whenever something accidentally triggers them to that hell. It’s something you should have gotten used to by now, but the aching behind your eyes reminds you that you weren’t invincible (even though you wished you were). You felt weak and useless, not knowing what you could do to help but you’d never let that show. It is up to you to hold this family together. The only thing motivating you now was the hope that tomorrow would be better than today, and with this glass-half-full mindset, you could see the progress. So you had to remain strong, for the good of your family. All of the sleepless nights and tears would all be worth it in the end. But until that day comes, you’ll just have to accept that this is your new normal.  

[taliaxlatia]

Rating: G

Summary: Xehanort continues to haunt Kairi's dreams. She hopes to find a way to uproot his phantom presence for good.

Wordcount: 2,011

Notes: Written for @kairizine with illustrations by @mellekist! This was super fun, so glad I got to be a part of it!!

XXX

In the Weeds

Sweet scents fill the crisp spring air, wafting up from blossoms of every shape and color. The flowers are separated within geometric plots: tall from short, leafy from bare, vibrant from muted. Blue-gray paving stones wind between each bed, like island chains connecting blooming continents. 

In the center of it all, a fountain gurgles. Shimmering water flows out like spokes of a wheel, giving life to flowers spreading past the horizon.

It’s a beautiful world. It resembles what would’ve been, should’ve been, her world—if not for the silver-haired man kneeling in the plot of flowerless dirt before her. 

“Good evening, Kairi,” he says, even though the sun hangs directly overhead, casting no shadows on the world below. He doesn’t look up from his work—though why he’s bothering to weed a plot of nothing but weeds is anyone’s guess. “I hope that your day was sufficiently pleasant.”

How can it be, when I have to see you at the end of it? she wants to snap, bitter as the violet garlic blossoms in the plot behind her. 

It doesn’t matter what she says, though. Nothing has been able to uproot this shadow of Xehanort from the soil of her dreams.

Tonight, he resembles his complete self—the one who had taken her as a child and sent her adrift. The one who had connected her heart to Sora. It’s his favorite form, from what she can tell, though he seems as helpless to choose between his alternate selves as she is to banish them. 

His purple ascot hangs untied around his neck. His lab coat has been set aside, folded neatly on the ground between the budding plants, leaving him in a collared shirt under a ribbed gray vest. His sleeves are rolled up to his elbows, but dirt has still managed to stain his cuffs.

If he’s a phantom, he’s a very vivid one. And if he’s not…

“Ah. No words to spare for me tonight? And here I was rather looking forward to your clever barbs.” He plucks a thorned weed from the plot of leafy stalks, twirling the stem between his fingers. 

She doesn’t know why a magical dream garden grows weeds at all, much less why Xehanort bothers to remove them, night after night. If not for his sisyphean effort, she would attribute the thorns to his corrupting influence. Of course, maybe he’s the reason this plot lacks the blooms that color the rest of the garden.

“I’m not here to entertain you, Xehanort,” she sighs.

“I suppose that’s true.” He nods thoughtfully. “I am meant to entertain you, more likely.”

She snorts, plopping down on the curved beam that edges this flower bed. If she has to be awake during her dreams, she can at least stop standing like she expects to be attacked.

Xehanort won’t harm her. He can’t. He’s tried a few times, when he first began invading her dreams. He seemed to believe that destroying her would free him from this dream-prison, but she’d just respawned, more frustrated than ever. 

His idea of “entertainment” is likely just as violent. If she hadn’t sparred so much today, she might’ve picked a fight with him, just to see if her training would show. 

Not that she expects to destroy him, either. No matter which form he’s taken, she hasn’t been able to best him—unless she counts the one time Sora had projected enough of his consciousness to assist her. 

(She doesn’t.)

“Well, if you have nothing to say, then you won’t object to me filling the silence.” He hums, inspecting a narrow, slightly yellowed leaf that looks just like every other narrow, slightly yellowed leaf in this plot. “I have not been able to determine what time of year this place is meant to mirror. Every bed seems to run on its own timeframe. I’ve spotted zinnia and hellebore blooming in plots barely two stepping stones apart.”

“It’s a magic garden.” Kairi yawns. “You don’t expect it to make sense, do you?”

“Not particularly. But that’s why this bed is so fascinating. None of these plants have flowered, despite every other species’ state of perpetual bloom.”

Kairi’s brow furrows as she inspects the plants. A few leafy stems end in tiny bulbs, with the hint of orange petals hiding within. For the most part, though, they just resemble tall grass.

It is strange. Not as strange as hearing Xehanort sound so interested, though.

“I assume you are familiar with these flowers, considering this is your garden,” he continues. “Asclepias tuberosa. More commonly known as butterfly weed. But are you aware of their significance?”

He’s wrong. The garden is as much a mystery to her as it is to him. She hesitates to give him any more power by admitting her ignorance, though. 

“So… they are weeds?” she asks tentatively. 

“‘Weed’ is merely a title given to any plant that grows where it isn’t wanted. It isn’t a very useful classifier, botanically.”

She frowns, leaning forward to pick at one of the leaves. 

“Something that grows where it isn’t wanted, huh? Sounds like you might know something about that.”

“Ah. There’s that wit of yours.” His smile looks entirely too genuine. On anyone else, she’d call the expression warm. “But yes, I do. What about you? You haven’t answered my question.”

She sighs. Unfortunately, she has nothing better to do than humor him. 

“I don’t know anything about butterfly weed,” she admits, deciding that his opinion of her doesn’t matter enough to pretend otherwise. 

“Really?” His eyes go wide with surprise. “I must reevaluate my hypotheses. That is what I get for assuming, I suppose…” He shakes his head. “Butterfly weed. In the code of flowers native to Radiant Garden, it is gifted as a goodbye—particularly to someone from which one desires long-term distance. The literally translated meaning is ‘let me go.’”

“Let me go…” she echoes quietly. 

If only the buds would bloom. This is the only flower she’d want to share with Xehanort.

“How do you know all this?” she asks, caught between suspicion and curiosity. She can’t imagine him studying flowers alongside the experiments that plunged her homeworld into darkness. 

“Ah. Let’s just say my former Master had plenty of chores for me to attend to… and my former companion had plenty of trivia to distract from the menial labor.” He smiles again, reminiscing fondly. “Of course, the meanings he assigned to each flower weren’t always accurate. I recall him trying to convince me that daffodils meant someone was ‘daft and smelled like dill.’”

He snorts softly, and Kairi’s teeth grind together to keep a shocked laugh from escaping. 

How can he sound so normal? This is the man who stole her from her birth family, who used her as a pawn against Sora time and time again. He doesn’t deserve to be here, tending flowers without a care in the world.

“It would be wonderful to see him again…” he murmurs while caressing one of the stems.

“You should’ve thought of that before you tried to destroy the worlds,” she says sharply.

Before you destroyed me. 

She can’t listen to this anymore. She doesn’t care if she’s stuck here all night; she’ll find another section of the garden to hide away in. 

She stands, only to be stopped short by his melancholy voice.

“Yes… I suppose I should have.” He sighs. His hand falls to his side, index finger tracing aimless trails through the dirt. “If I had only been content with what I had… perhaps my life would not have ended alone.”

His form flickers like static, and a black coat replaces his gray vest and pants. The spikes of his hair split and darken a shade. 

Xemnas. The Xehanort who delivered her up to her final fate.

“If that’s your way of apologizing for kidnapping me, it could use some work,” she huffs.

She refuses to flinch away from his more intimidating appearance. He’s still kneeling in the dirt. He still can’t hurt her. Not this time.

“You would accept an apology from me?” he asks, brow furrowed. His voice is at least a half-octave deeper now. 

Jarringly, it reminds her of when Wakka’s voice dropped in junior high. At least the ridiculous mental comparison makes it easier to stand up to Xemnas.

“No. But it wouldn’t hurt.”

He chuckles ruefully, dipping his head. 

“Very well. I am sorry for the pain you have suffered at my hands…” He takes his original form again, and his shoulders relax a little. “Though it is impossible for me to honestly apologize for everything.”

She frowns. She doesn’t believe he’s honest about anything—but if he’s going to lie, why not go all in?

“What do you mean?” 

“Radiant Garden was already doomed, before any of my actions took effect. The Ansem you call ‘Wise’ made sure of that.” He snorts. “But you… you were our hope, Miss Kairi. If not for your bond with Sora, who would have come to pull us from the dark?”

He snaps a closed bud from its stem, holding it out to her like a peace offering.

“I sent you off. And you found a home that you treasured, did you not? The same home that half of me hailed from.” His visage flickers to that of Master Xehanort, but thankfully becomes his younger self again. She can’t look into the Master’s eyes without feeling like she’s choking. “And so the wind blows the next generation of seeds back out to sea…”

She does treasure the Islands. But most of all, she treasures the friends she has there. Her adopted parents. Sephie, Tidus, Wakka. Sora and Riku… 

Sora, trapped in a realm beyond her comprehension. Riku, searching for him alone.

“I just want my friends back.” Her throat tightens. She doesn’t take the offered bud. “If you really cared, you wouldn’t have sent me to them just to take them away.”

“This is true.” Xehanort’s arm drops, letting the snapped stem fall. “I did not care. It is only in death that I can see how shortsighted that was.”

He looks up, and for once, she believes the regret in his brown eyes—a different color from the other Xehanorts. 

(Why? It can’t be Terra’s influence. Terra’s eyes are blue.)

“But there is nothing I can do for them now. I’m sorry,” he murmurs. “You and I are both seeds drifting far from those we called friends.”

“Don’t—don’t compare yourself to me.” She shakes her head, her hands trembling.

He can still hurt her. He doesn’t need keyblades or magic—he just needs to be human. To nurture her sympathies the way he attempts to nurture this garden. 

She hates that she wants to fall for it. She wants to believe the man trapped in her mind isn’t as evil as he appears. Is she really this desperate for someone to understand her?

Xehanort simply nods, returning to his silent plucking of weeds. Red wells from the pads of his fingers where thorns prick them.

It’s what he deserves. To be alone and forgotten. 

(As alone and forgotten as she is.)

…Light, now she’s comparing them. The seed he’s planted has already taken root.

She brushes one butterfly weed bud—and a single petal peels free, facing the sun.

Her breath catches. How…?

Xehanort looks up at the sound, then to the opening orange bloom. His eyes widen.

“How did you…?” he echoes her thoughts.

She nearly says she doesn’t know. But—but she does.

She knows. And she knows how to make him leave.

(Asclepias tuberosa. “Let me go.”)

The flower bloomed when her hate had wavered. The question is, can it waver again? Can she let go of this pain for good?

Not yet. Not yet, but eventually. Hope blooms in her chest, bright as the flower in her hand.

“It’s my garden, remember?” She grips the blossom tight, its stem leaking warm sap against her palm. “I still hold the power here.”

And with that power, she’ll set herself free.

[desultory-novice]

I'd gotten a shocking number of asks in over the past few days so it was inevitable I'd hold another... Lightning Round!!

Featuring: King D-Mind, Magolor, Adeleine + Noir, Dark Meta Knight, Sectonia, Dedede, Dark Taranza, Leongar and...

...SPECIAL NECRODEUS THEORY INSIDE!

Edit: OOPS! I meant to set this post up for tonight instead of unleashing it at some ungodly hour of the morning. Amateur mistake. Don't mind if you see me reblog it later when people are awake.

-

Considering regular Dark Mind has some strong callbacks to Nightmare in his design (being a visual melange of Nightmare + Zero) you could believe they were partners/allies/frenemies at one point. It's possible that it was Parallel Dark Mind (because it pretty much as to be the Parallel of Dark Mind, right?) who decided, after possessing Parallel Dedede, that they had surpassed their fellow long-faced wizard rival-friend and stopped answering his calls.

Speaking of friends, I wonder if Parallel Nightmare had any underlings of his own akin to Dark Taranza and Pres. Parallel Susie. Ones that maybe wouldn't stab him in the back? ...Hmm, I wonder where Parallel Magolor and Parallel Marx are right now?

(If they're still vicious trouble makers, I wonder if it was one of them who was like "Oh, you TOTALLY ought to reach out to this guy if you get in trouble." "For sure! The results will be a real spectacle, I bet!")

Haha! I wonder if I could start alternatively calling DMK x DMK (Shadow Dedede vers) DMKx2 or DMKsquared? But now that I think about duplicates and parallel selves (thanks to Crash's ask above) isn't it a little worriesome (/lh) that there are probably MANY "parallel" versions out there? Because again, D-Mind is probably possessing a Parallel Dedede but NOT the Parallel Dedede from Star Allies. And there may also be yet a third Dedede in the Clash verse who isn't possessed by anyone?! I mean, when it comes down to it, "parallel" just means "a universe that turned out differently!"

There could be dozens of "same character" down the line...

I certainly think the potential for this idea is HUGE!

I myself am a fan of Magolor having to confront versions of himself that turned out wrong but the idea that he'd run across a version that was "wrong" but also did HARM to his friends...

Yeah, the "pay for one's sins" guy would definitely step in.

And I agree that is probably how he learned so much about events he wouldn't otherwise be around for. Dark Matter Clone? Susie's Father? Although I feel there's a chance he knew about Joronia from earlier all on his own. After all, he includes an accurate description of her in his weapon's catalogue in his shoppe! (And again, we've got the portraits on the abandoned TDX castle to suggest Magolor and Taranza communicated on some level in the past.)

As for the equipment, it's possible that those were in a way his "redemption" to Kirby - the only Kirby he had access to until he was able to "return to Dream Land" - and so keeping them didn't make sense. They were gifts. I also get the feeling that he doesn't have a huge interesting in physical fighting, and at least half of the gear is swords and axes. (The way he uses his version of the Ultra Sword is very particular and indicates no proficiency in swordsmanship on his part.) But if he really is dimension hopping on a semi-regular basis, he may also just need to keep it in stock at the shop!

Awwww...! Dess will never admit this ask actually got Dess to draw a super quick sketch of Noir as an angel watching over Adeleine from heaven(What even is "heaven" in the Kirby-verse anyway?) right after reading it! Oh fudge, I just admitted to that very thing didn't I?! Nooo! What have I done?! It's so DeviantArt-tier sappy though that I don't want to post it. It's so cliche it would utterly ruin my rep! Definitely don't politely ask me to post it because then I might give in...!!

...A-ahem. But yes, Adeleine will be okay!

As to whether poor, poor Noir will ever learn that for himself, all I can say is... hold out hope for the final two parts of the story!

I feel so embarrassed because I had to go back and look at the pic to realize they were even there. It was completely subconscious on my part. I guess that's the thing about being a novice artist. Sometimes you stumble upon something really cool without even noticing!

But now that you've pointed it out, it's something I think I'd like to keep doing. DMK as a sort of chipping crystal ball is neat~

Despite all that I wrote in my initial post about this...

...I kinda want her to come back too! She was a great tragic villain! And the possibility of a Triple Deluxe remake... it could still happen!

(I mean, we just got Amazing Mirror with modern online multiplayer! It feels like they went the extra mile for that and so I think the Kirby series is still in a good place for receiving (good) fan service!)

Yesss! It is SO good! Big, muscle-guy Dedede being tech-oriented?! It's out of type in the best way! I love that Dedede continually unlocks his potential, both in the changes to his personality but what he's capable of in skill sets too! It is, to me, the reason WHY he is Kirby's rival rather than Meta Knight or another character.

And if Meta Knight pilots a ship anything like he does a car in Dreamy Gear, it's a good thing he isn't the pilot. I wonder if there's a disconnect for him between flying and piloting? Like going from playing a 2D side-scrolling/overhead shooter where "up" is up versus playing one in first-person with reverse camera controls?

Poor Vul must put up with so much...!

It could just be me (I think multiple interpretations are best) but I've always taken Dark Taranza's garb to not as a sign he took over Sectonia's role but as...a form of mourning for her?

Like he dresses and styles himself that way as tribute? So I suppose in that sense, I don't think Mirror Sectonia got corrupted.

Oh boy, I suppose my brief theory there works REALLY well for the people who think main world Sectonia got swapped with her Mirror World self if Dark Taranza "lost" her and then took up her "style."

(Although I also adore your "Mirror Sectonia started crazy and became good" theory too! It's wild in the best of ways!/genuine And just because I saw Dark Taranza as dressing that way doesn't mean Evil King Taranza isn't also an amazing idea!)

Y-You know, my family often catches me on my accidentally using phrases that are maybe a little more coded and/or have different and deeper meanings than I probably intended. ^^;

So :cough: to clarify, I wouldn't necessarily say Leon's worthy of a full on diagnosis, but in his short pre-fight monologue (11 text boxes long) two of those contain a variation on the phrase "left behind."

And two more talk about long-held dreams and years of planning.

It suggests to me that Leon thinks about the animals being left behind by humanity a lot. Which is really interesting when you realize that as the literal King of the Beasts with a pack, nay a whole planet full of animals at his call and the entire run of the natural landscape to their own... he should really WANT for nothing??

Having Humanity ditch would be ideal for an animal-led society. And Leon doesn't specify what he wants the miraculous power for but...I get the feeling he wouldn't mind a chance to sink his teeth into AHEM "talk" to the ex-Forgotten Landers.

Now, whether Leon has felt their being ditched happened enough for it to become a reoccurring condition, uh... I guess Elfilis did shatter his soul and leave him for dead?  But the truth is I probably just exaggerated a wee bit. (But it got me this ask and a chance to talk about Leongar and I love the Beast Pack so it's all good!)

Also, you know, I'm just generally pretty notorious (?!) for reading a LOT (...too much?) characterization into very little! 

Heh. I just know some of you are out there patiently trying to persuade me to become a Necrodeus fan~! XD

That said, I think the idea of him being a "...for the cost of your soul" Devil is very neat. It's a role the Kirby-verse doesn't have currently and could surely benefit from, at least when it comes to interesting interactions with the cast as a whole!

But, heh, you see, I think it's MORE interesting if he's not...!

...BecauseI pored back over the Skull Lord's wiki page for this (I wanted to see if he had some kind of title that would support the "devil" interpretation) and I spotted something that was of EXTREME interest to me given my obsession with the theory that :cough: 

All Ancient Artifacts Corrupt Absolutely!!!

Because Daroach says that the Skullys as a whole "changed" noticeably AFTER Necrodeus got ahold of shiny new Magic Staff...

Gosh! What's this?! Sudden personality changes associated with the acquisition of a magical artifact?! You don't say!!

And look at the dang thing! I point specifically to the clawed talons clutching the center jewel. Like the talons of a certain crown...?

Also, how else could someone like Necrodeus (no offense to Necrodeus fans) split OUR nearly invincible Kirby into ten weaker copies? ...Sounds like an Ancient Artifact at work to me!

(Necrodeus another victim?! Uh oh, I may become a fan after all!)

Edit: ...Actually, I just got a weird sense of deja vu. Did I write about Necrodeus' staff being a Master Crown-tier object before??

That'd be embarrassing! (I've crested 1k posts though, so it wouldn't be too surprising if I start repeating myself at some point. ^^; )

[snow-system-wol]

A moment behind closed doors -- a different perspective on that attempt on S'ria's life, G'raha helping him clean up and calm down. (~2k)

The original incident is not confirmed canon, so this isn't either.

(moderate discussion of blood, implications of past trauma, non-sexual phys intimacy)

You were almost surprised S'ria wasn't made anxious by this carry – almost, but not quite. S'ria was surely too dissociated to panic over being lifted wrongly at this moment.

You'd felt him retreat as you'd healed him... not into another of his selves, but simply into temporary absence. With him sat in front of you, arms clasped tightly behind your neck, face buried in your chest – there were few options if he remained locked in place. When you held the back of his thighs and stood up with him like that, the lack of flinch scared you more than the alternative. 

One step at a time. 

Being clean would help you both. You hoped Ria's apprentice would be alright while waiting. You feared the process may turn out to be a slow one. 

Once in the bathroom, you temporarily put S'ria down on a bench by the tub and started the water. After quickly rinsing one hand, you plucked a linkpearl from one of your pockets. This one was a shared line amongst all of the… well, they still were the Scions to you, always. S'ria was still your highest priority, and you only wanted to make him wait a handful of moments.

You described the situation in a few sentences. In the chaos that followed, it was all you could do to remind them you needed to return your attention to your husband immediately, and that the danger was past for the moment. 

They would have to wait their turn – the linkpearl wasn't going anywhere near the bath anyway.

While the tub continued to fill, you took stock of the damage to each of you and your clothing.

…You feared they might be beyond saving, but you intended to make an effort all the same. Your life was a simple one, after all, even if you technically had access to funds for a more expensive retirement.

Yours were less bad, at least. Your knees were soaked from kneeling, and S’ria clinging to you had bloodied much of your shirt, but it was not a complete travesty.

S’ria's, on the other hand…

Well, you'd at least let them soak in water and see what happened. You held a washbasin under the faucet and placed it off to the side with a bit of detergent. It would have to do, while you dealt with everything else tonight.

Planning was one thing – this would be the delicate part, you knew.

It was not without precedent, though, even if under circumstances far less dire – bad pain days rather than being in shock.

“Ria?”

He at least turned to look at you.

“I am sure you must not be feeling your best, to say the least – will you be alright if I am assisting you?”

He stared at you for a long time, tired and disoriented. You took waiting time as a chance to stop the faucet before the tub became overly full.

His voice was low and raspy, but he did eventually respond to you. 

“Just… Just don't undress me while you're still fully clothed. That's worse.” He paused for a moment, lost in thought. “Maybe don't be totally naked, though.”

You smiled gently at him. “Of course. That is quite doable.”

Your shirt came off easily. Your trousers, nearly tacky at the knee where fabric touched skin, did not. You almost hoped to hear a stifled laugh from S'ria as you awkwardly hopped your way through removing them.

Maybe it was now your goal to hear a genuine laugh from him sometime that night – it would at least be a good sign. 

When you dropped your clothes into the washbasin, the water immediately turned pink. You cringed and reminded yourself the water would need to be replaced after the bath at the very least– you'd feel conscious of waste if you did not have a more renewable source of water than average, a water crystal converter placed where a natural well would be.

You approached him cautiously, despite permission being granted. He stared up at you from his seat, quiet and still, but his eyes were lucid.

“Alright, shirt first, then.”

It was an odd thing, trying to lift a shirt over someone's head with them only partially attempting to help. Your eyes followed a vivid pink line on his side, the remnants of what you'd immediately healed when you found him. You could only be agonizingly grateful that S'ria had managed to avoid what was surely meant to be lethal. If you let yourself dwell on that for too long, you'd have a breakdown.

You were certain that S'ria's would-be assassin had a deeply painful and personal reason for coming here. 

…You could not muster any pity for the corpse downstairs, though. What S'ria did in panic, you may well have done quite intentionally, if it came down to it.

S'ria shivered slightly and you returned your attention to the task at hand. Your hands hovered by his hips in a moment of hesitation. “Are you still alright with this, Ria?”

This was the part you had worried more about – unbuttoning trousers, working them off his legs with utmost care around his bad knee, lifting him a few ilms to divest him of what layers remained. You did your best to not let your hands touch bare skin more than necessary in dangerous spots – you could not imagine he'd bear such a thing for long without problems.

He looked tired, not panicked, and you were far more pleased with that than the latter option. 

He also looked cold, shivering, but that would be remedied in a moment. 

The bench was already right next to the tub, so lifting S'ria those couple of fulms barely required you to move. He sighed in relief at the hot water, melting once he was fully lowered into the bath.

It was the most relaxed S'ria had looked in this last half-bell. Thank the gods.

You dragged a stool over from near the sink. This part, this was finally truly more familiar territory. 

All you needed here was within reach – soap, washclothes, shampoo, scented oils for hair and body. You put a few drops of lavender oil into the water, to cover up some of the coppery scent of blood in the room. You knew it would not fix the problem for two miqo'te, as sensitive as you were to smells, but it may make it easier to forget for the moment.

S'ria's eyes were half-closed, cautiously watching you soap up a washcloth.

“May I?”

“Mhm.”

You gave him a small smile as you leaned over the tub. It was a verbal response, at least – he was coming out of the worst of it.

“Here – prop your legs up for a moment.”

He obliged, letting you clean what traces remained on his legs – luckily only really from the knee downwards. On his right leg, you were so gentle, but he still winced at the pressure on his knee.

…He didn't normally have such difficulties, even on the bad pain days you could gently massage the joint. You would have to see about pain medication later, with how little healing could help this many years later. S'ria must've moved wrong during the scuffle, you suspected.

You took one look at the water in the tub and pulled out the drain stopper, turning the faucet back on at the same time. It'd cycle to being clean water eventually.

“Your hands, please?”

The intimacy was normally something you'd cherish. Wiping his hands clean with such care, working your way up his forearms, the hint of a self-soothing purr in his chest – you liked having this. You just much preferred the comfort of such a thing on peaceful days. It felt wrong to even find it pleasant on a night like this.

Perhaps that was thinking about it backwards. Perhaps, because of the fear and chaos, choosing to accept a gentle moment without guilt was the best thing to do.

Removing the rest of the blood from his skin was mostly an easy thing. His shoulders and upper chest, cautiously cleaning off his face – simple. It was only near his collarbones that you paused. This absolutely needed to be dealt with, tacky and half-dried as it was, but…

“Ria?"

He hummed, looking only half awake.

“Ria, your neck. I… I dare not…”

His eyes snapped open and he stared at you for a long moment, before he reached for the washcloth. His hand stopped several ilms away, fingers twitching. He snatched it away from you in a flash, hastily bringing it near his neck – and then truly froze. After a long moment, where the only sound was the running faucet and a faint clock ticking, he slowly held the washcloth back out to you.

“Just do it.”

You opened your mouth to ask whether he was sure, but there was a look in his eyes that made you feel as though that was the last thing he wanted.

Instead, you casually shifted closer – just enough time for him to tell you to stop, if he wanted. He did not.

Once you actually reached his neck, you dropped your leisurely speed in favor of efficiency. Oh, you wanted to keep a light touch, of course, but you also wanted it over as soon as possible for S'ria.

It could not have been longer than ten seconds, but it felt like so much more than that. S'ria shook violently once your hand pressed over his throat, eyes squeezed shut and a plaintive noise bit back behind clenched teeth. You were not fully conscious of what you were saying, just low-voiced reassurances as you swept the washcloth over scarred skin.

...He'd asked you to touch there, once, with your bare hands. Trying to prove some point to himself, and yet not letting go of your wrist for some semblance of control. It was not long before he wrenched your hand away from his neck.

Though he had not panicked at the time, either, and that'd been what he wanted to know – if he could handle it after so much time had passed.

You hoped he wouldn't hold this reaction right now against himself. It was hardly a normal state of mind to evaluate his healing – there was a reason you'd been so hesitant.

“Shh… ‘tis done, Ria – can you look at me? Give me a nod if you know where you are.”

The air left your lungs in a rush at his tiny nod – good. Good, he was still here with you.

“Are you going to wash my hair?”

You jumped at the suddenness of his voice returning.

“That was the plan, unless you would prefer otherwise?”

S'ria shook his head slowly. “No. I want you to.” He managed a weak smile. “Feels nice.”

You'd already meant to assist – cringing as you look over the blood already drying in his hair – but you were all the more willing if it was something that he'd personally like as well.

And it was so familiar too. It was not so uncommon that you'd stick around to wash S'ria's hair on some of the more physically difficult days for him. 

You returned the smile. “Could you duck your head under the faucet for me?”

S'ria shifted obligingly. His ears flicked in annoyance at the first bits of water that hit them, but he soon settled into sitting calmly under the running water. This was a bit out of order, an extra step, but you wanted his hair somewhat clean before you began using soap.

He jolted when you began running your fingers through his bangs and fringes – just shy of smacking his head on the faucet, really, and you murmured an apology at the missing warning. You pulled back for the moment, telling him he could turn. You moved your perch to the head of the tub while he stretched out, wiggling to rest his head on the edge near you.

As soon as you began washing his hair, he melted completely. You had a very good sense now of what would hurt his scalp or pull on his hair versus what qualified as an excellent massage, and before long he was properly purring. You could not help but return the noise.

Perhaps a timely bath was in order, considering you'd most certainly heard a familiar set of voices in the main room nearly a quarter bell ago now.

Perhaps, but you felt that taking care of S'ria was a higher priority than fully discussing the matter with the others. So you lined up the more optional luxuries, oils that would leave his hair soft and pleasant smelling. If nothing else, he would have that bit of niceness for the rest of the night.

S'ria was nearly asleep by the time you were done – which was no small wonder, given the Incident itself had already been past midnight. He was quiet as you helped him out of the bath and got him into a soft robe, but a sort of quiet that was more tired than absent.

You grabbed a bathrobe of your own and let him lean heavily on you to compensate for the lack of cane. When you reached for the bathroom door handle, with a questioning look at him, he gave you a nod.

Yes, it was surely easier to face the situation now.

[rae-arachne]

🕸the spider's gaze: horror film reviews🕸

Welcome to the spider's gaze, where I pluck something from the Cave of Carnography and see what it has to say about drugs, sex, violence, and the human condition. Tonight's film...

American Mary (2012)

(Does the Dog Die) (🏴‍☠️)

Horror: 4/5 (Very gory at times but only rarely horrific)

Horny/Homoerotic: 3/5 (the sex is not very sexy. the surgery and blood however...)

Good as in well constructed: 2.5/5

Good as in I like it: 4.5/5

Overall: A-

Summary: American Mary is a movie that is obsessed with the body and the things people do to it. It sees sex as violence, surgery as sadism, and extreme body modifications as love. It's part the story of an impoverished medical student overcoming the sexism of the medical field to do great things, and part the story of the birth and death of a monster. It is a modern classic to me.

The movie opens with close up, almost erotic, shots of a turkey having surgery done on it to the sound of classical music, so you know you are in for a ride right away. We soon learn that Mary is a medical student who is the granddaughter of a Budapest immigrant and is plagued with financial troubles. These troubles are relieved one night when she goes into a strip club looking to become a dancer, and leaves as an emergency, off the books surgeon and extreme body modifier. At first reluctant to accept this role that has been thrust onto her, Mary soon dives in head first after being assaulted by one of her professors and subsequently dropping out of medical school and taking revenge on her assaulter.

This is where a lot of people might be turned off of American Mary, and see it as another "woman scorned" story, and that is definitely valid. But what I love about it is that it never seems like this story line removes Mary's agency. She never becomes a complete monster or loses herself. She does plenty of fucked up shit, and becomes petty and dangerous and sadistic, but she also tries to help people become their "true selves" through the power of extreme body mods. She really feels like an underdog trying to improve the world with the skills at her disposal.

Dr.Mary Mason (if Frankenstein can be refereed to as a doctor, so can Mary) is a slasher on the order of Norman Bates and honestly should have been just as impactful. Unfortunately, this movie came out about 10-15 years too late for that to have happened. She is iconic and unique in everything. Katharine Isabelle pulls off the complexity and contradictions of the character beautifully and makes her unlike any "woman turned monstrous by the patriarchy."

Personally, the character of Lance, who becomes Mary's bodyguard, is my favorite. I love a big softy who is capable of incredible violence, and this line gets me every time. It is delivered perfectly.

I do agree that the ending leaves something to be desired, as does the toxic straight-yuri plotline that goes nowhere. Dr.Mary is eventually killed by the husband of one of her clients after he finds out she has been "dollified". While this does have thematic appropriateness (the theme of men only valuing women when they can provide them with sex) it does feel anticlimactic. This is a movie that leaves you wanting more in a bad way. If Mary had miraculously survived and disappeared into the night, Michael Myers style, that would have felt more complete. As it is, it feels a bit disappointing that she can never escape patriarchal violence.

It is still a love letter to the alternative freaks, creeps and sickos trying to make it in the world, and something of a comfort movie to me.

[alexisazria]

The Most Dangerous Phrase In Education

The Most Dangerous Phrase In Education https://www.teachthought.com/education/dangerous-phrase-education/ What Is The Most Dangerous Phrase In Education? by Terry Heick I was speaking (tweeting) with Mark Barnes tonight, and he mentioned the idea of challenging existing forms and practices. And then someone tweeted the above image–a quote attributed to Rear Admiral Grace Hopper, according to the image source globalnerdy.com–and I was happy and favorited and saved and blogged. “We’ve always done it this way” implies legacy and tradition, which can be good. But it’s also one of the most dangerous phrases we can use—and this danger extends to education, as well. I talk a lot about disruptive teaching and paradigm shifting in teaching and learning not because I’m inherently rebellious, or some kind of academic anarchist. I’ve just taught long enough–in a wide variety of places–to realize that this idea of progress–and slow iteration–through data and sharing and ‘opening our classroom door’ just isn’t sufficient. It’s not bad, it just doesn’t reflect the priority and urgency of our collective challenge. At best, students come to school to play the game and be thought of as smart and successful; at worst, they come to disrupt and resist and simply make it through the year because they see no value in what they do. We have to create laws to force students to come to school, and it’s often the students that need school the worst who aren’t ‘made’ for it; that is, school is made for students who are strong readers and writers that can manage their work while learning to play nicely with others. Changing lives usually comes from relationships with teachers rather than the power of curriculum. But talking about mobile learning, self-directed learning, new content areas, adaptive learning, or valuing questions over answers can kill conversations in school and elicit polite smiles from teachers, mainly because those aren’t the rules of the game they know. The problem with the safe approach to teaching is that it won’t yield anything other than what we’ve always had. Without doing things radically different, the most we can hope for is some kind of increment. This isn’t a plea for chaos, but rather the courage to make mistakes. The phrase, ‘We’ve always done it this way’ symbolizes stagnant thinking and a resistance to innovation, reflecting an unwillingness to question established methods or consider new ideas. This mindset often stifles creativity, limits progress, and prevents growth by clinging to outdated practices simply because they are familiar. It can also create an environment where change is seen as a threat rather than an opportunity for improvement, discouraging individuals from challenging the status quo or exploring alternative solutions. Over time, this rigid adherence to tradition can lead to missed opportunities, decreased efficiency, and a lack of adaptability in a rapidly evolving world. To foster innovation and continuous improvement, it’s crucial to replace this mindset with one that values flexibility, embraces change, and encourages forward-thinking approaches. To ‘experiment’ on students (because that’s what’s already happening anyway). Dream, try, and collect data. Do something different this year. Don’t necessarily–and mindlessly–do what you’re told.  Light up a new pathway. Creatively, professionally, and persistently agitate your department, grade level, school, or district to not just become the best version of their existing selves, but become something else that they didn’t think was possible. The same hope you have for your students. The Most Dangerous Phrase In Education The post The Most Dangerous Phrase In Education appeared first on TeachThought.

[epitomees]

Chihiro had a scrapbook hobby. A hidden side Kazuki hadn’t known until, well, she had been gifted one. The topic had been decided, but the details were a mystery. Nothing too cliché, trite or anything else. Which proved to be rather difficult if all the ready made sets contained things like those. She highly doubted Chihiro appreciated floral flowers or smiling bees.

No, Naoto pulled out some origami books, spines showing some wear and tear along with age, some instructions from various websites and began to work. All of them 2D for scrapbooking purposes. It ranged from simple to complex and by the end of it, her hands were tired from near constant folding and unfolding. (If Chihiro were to look closely at one, she’d find that it resembled a certain guinea pig.)

All were placed in a clear plastic case, which doubled as another item for Chihiro to use.

“Something custom for your birthday is always appreciated, no?”

Anything, at this point during the day, was greatly appreciated. Much of her day's activities consisted of sorting through heaps of detective paraphernalia construed for the sole purpose of appeasing 'Naoto-sama's' favor. Some may see such actions as admirable, even downright praiseworthy depending on the person's own self-fulfillment issues, but it left a very bitter aftertaste in Naoto's mouth. These people praised and worshiped an icon. A false idol, even. A faux personality erected upon the basis of society's ideologies.

That wasn't Naoto Shirogane. That wasn't her anymore.

"I would say your current company is appreciated as well." A long sigh passed through pursed lips, sounding as if she had kept that frustration and annoyance bottled up for quite a long while. Evening soon settled upon the surrounding environment painting the skies with its classic hues of pinks, oranges, and yellows. What an enjoyable birthday it turned out to be. "You have something for me?" No surprise, this time. Each passing yearly cycle made Naoto grow more accustomed to being handed gifts from others, including her own alternate selves. For this year's celebration, a simple bag of folded paper creations. The common swan was instantly recognized without even unzipping the bag, but closer inspection revealed a plethora of various other designs hidden deeper within. Some very simple and straightforward, requiring very little effort, while a few turned out to be quite complex. More intricate in their folds, but satisfying when the end product worked without a hitch.

And yes, that guinea pig did not go unnoticed.

"...you must have had a good amount of spare time on your hands if you managed to craft a fairly sizable amount of origami." Just for herself, to use however she pleased. She returned each piece back inside the bag in the same exact order Chihiro slipped them out. Keeping them in their original positions meant less chance of it being damaged or for inverted folds to overlap between others. "They are...very nice." Perfect for hobby purposes...

...which must have been the intended desire of use when Kazuki decided to give these as her gift. She remembered.

"Please...it is almost dinner." Chihiro gestured towards the front entrance. "You are already here, so you are welcomed to stay and share a meal with us. Yakushiji has prepared..." She looked away, clearing her throat in the process. "...a favorite of mine...for tonight's dinner. I'm sure you will find it enjoyable-" And delicious. "-as well."

[tekras-iszovh]

"= i am certain from what i have heard that i would do fine. i would need to take a step back and get back into a certain mindset, but, not much else. my horns have very sharp tips, and. i will leave it there. ="

"= eh see, i would rather put that off onto someone else. i tried to do it with a number of my alternate selves and letting them come up with something from scratch but they are much much more interested in fighting eachother. and that's no fun. ive seen it all before. i guess i could go and fuck around and dig through other societies to find the one i want, but. hm. to know i am responsible for it, if it ends up useless? ha. no. i will let nature work, maybe. ="

"= oh, it is for gambling? i will politely not gamble on your world on account of competitive advantage but. interesting, i have seen a wide variety. most sports are bloodsports on the home planet, and regularly televised, too. it's not special but i am desensitive to it. i am interested in the mech stuff but seeing it all get torn apart might just make me wince. you've mentioned mazes like three times this conversation, just the topic of tonight? i can get behind it. ="

"= you have people close to you participate? ... ah. i would never trust it, not unless i rigged it. ha. ="

Hahaha someone's hacking my personal system.

Guess who's going to hell for the rest of their life as I literally rip them outta their seat and into my OS.

[moocowofdoom]

Tbh I'm pretty happy with just how fast my dreams went from like a 6/10 to an 11/10 on detail and length and insanity now that I havent smoked weed in about a week. I also have em like every night instead of like every other or every 3rd.

[chaos-writes-fanfiction]

You’re in love with him

A/n I gave his mom the name Mei.

Warnings: none just some fluff, friends to lovers

Pairings: Aone × fem!reader

Being best friends with Aone came easily having your mother’s being best friends and living down the street from one another meant spending lots of time with him becoming close friends your selves. Always going to school together and waiting for him during practice so you can go home together. Having weekly sleepovers alternating who’s house unless he was away for a game, tournament or training camp.

And today you made your way to the gym to watch practice while doing homework, before staying at his house for the weekend. When you walk in the guys were still stretching.

“Hey guys” you said walking in

They greeted you with several ‘hey’ or 'hi’ from them as they started to warm up. Taking your normal seat and starting on your homework. When suddenly a volleyball comes flying at you unexpectedly and smashing into the side of your face. The whole team freezes except Aone who is running up to you.

“Way to go” Futakuchi said sarcastically to Koganegawa “dont be surprised when Aone kills you for hitting her”

“Let me see” Aone said softly moving your hand away from your cheek

Your cheek was very red and bruising already as tears fell down your cheeks. He ghosted his thumb over your cheek to wipe your tears

“Ow” you whimpered

“Here” Sakunami said handing Aone a ice pack that he wrapped a towel in so the ice wasn’t directly on your skin

He took it and gently placed it on your cheek holding your face so gently in his hand. You gently place your hand over his on your cheek.

“Thanks bear” you whisper his childhood nickname

He smiled softly at that. Then his smile dropped as he removed his hand from your cheek your hand still holding the ice pack as he turned and glared at Koganegawa.

“I promise it was an accident I didnt mean to” Koganegawa said quickly

“Then why haven’t you apologized to her?” Sakunami asked

Koganegawa ran over to you hanging his head

“I’m so sorry Senpai” he said “I didnt mean to”

“Please be more careful Koganegawa” you said

He nodded and they went back to practice you packed up your things as you waited for them to clean up to walk home with Aone. Your cheek still hurt and it had potential to give you a black eye from where it hit your cheek.

“Let’s go” Aone said when they were finished

“Can I get a piggyback ride to the train station?” You asked

He nodded and crouched down. You climb on and he holds your legs as you wrap your arms around his neck as he starts walking to the train station, resting your non bruised cheek against his his back. He set you down while waiting for the train. When you finally arrive to his house you walk in taking off your shoes in the now permanent space for you since you were over so often.

“Are you kids home?” His mom calls from the kitchen

“Yes we are Mei” you said

“Dinner is just about ready if you want to wash up” she said

Aone walks up to the bathroom to shower quickly before dinner. As you walk into the kitchen washing your hands to help finish making dinner.

“How are you dear?” Mei asked her back to you

“I’m good” you said as you move next to her cutting up some green onion

“What happened to your face?” She asked alarmed seeing the bruise

“I was watching practice and I got hit with a stray spike” you said

“Oh dear” she said “have you iced it?”

“Yes, bear made me right after it happened” you said

She smiled at the use of Aones nickname “of course he did” she said “but it looks like it still going to be around for a little while.”

“Yeah unfortunately” she said “the first year that accidentally hit me felt so bad I thought he was going to start crying”

She giggled softly and you both finished up making dinner which was shoyu ramen (soy sauce based)

“Will you go get him for dinner?” Mei asked

You nod and go upstairs to his room the shower wasn’t going anymore. So you walk to his door and knock. He opens the door letting you in. Hes drying his hair from his shower wearing black sweats and a white tshirt.

“Dinner is ready” you said smiling up at him.

“What are we having?” He asked putting the towel in his basket

“Ramen” you said

“Good its going to be cold tonight” he said.

He lightly touches your cheek again.

“I’m okay” you said

“I know I worry still” he said

“You always do” you said leaning into his touch and turn to kiss the palm of his hand “let’s go eat”

You take his hand in yours not noticing the wash of pink on his cheeks as you lead him down to the table and taking your normal seat beside him. After dinner and helping him clean up, his mom left going to the store to get some groceries and some snacks for the both of you for the weekend.

You go upstairs with him, he started on his homework and you lounge on his bed keeping him company when your phone started ringing.

“I’ll be right back” you tell him as you leave his room

You walk to the living room. And sit down and answer your girl bestfriends call

“Hey, Yachi” you said

“Hey honey” she said

“What’s up?” You asked

“I wanted to ask if you wanted to have a sleep over this weekend” she said “me, kiyoko and Saeko are here”

“Oh I can’t, I’m already staying at Aone’s this weekend” you said

“Have you confessed to him yet?” Saeko asked

“What do you mean? Hes my best friend we’ve been friends our whole lives my mom and his mom are childhood bestfriends too” you said

“You spend all your time with him unless hes away for volleyball” she said

“Well yeah…” you said

“Did something happen?” Kiyoko asked

“I got hit with a stray spike in the face” you said

“And how did he react?” Yachi asked

“He ran over right away and checked on me and gave me an ice pack after wiping my tears away” you said

“And after practice?” Saeko asked

“He gave me a piggyback ride to the train station and we took the train home, I helped his mom finish making dinner and we ate, I was keeping him company in his room while he did homework until you called” you said

“I hate to be the one to say it but you and him act more like boyfriend and girlfriend not friends” kiyoko said

You sat in silence for a little while thinking about everything.

“Hey are you still there?” Saeko asked

“Oh god” you said

“You’re in love with him” kiyoko said you could hear the smile in her voice

“Yeah…” you trailed off

“Then go tell him” Saeko said

“Is everything alright dear?” Mei asked

You hang up the phone and look up at her as she stood in front of you

“I just realized something” you whispered looking down

“What?” She asked concerned

“I’m in love with him” you whispered afraid to say it too loudly

“Who?” She asked tilting your chin up “Takanobu?”

“Yes” you whispered nodding

She smiled and kissed your forehead “I’m happy you finally figured it out” she said

“What?” You asked confused

“Your mom and I were wondering when you’d finally figure it out” she said

“Really?” You asked “you both knew?”

“Oh my dear, I’m pretty sure the only ones who didnt know were you and him” she said smiling “now, why dont you go tell him”

You nod a little hesitantly but go back upstairs after texting yachi why you hung up so suddenly. When you walk back in hes closing his text books

“Finished already?” You asked

“Yes” he said standing up and walking over to sit on his bed

You go and sit beside him.

“Can I tell you something?” You asked

“Of course” he said

You take a deep breath and let it out slowly resting your head on his shoulder “I love you, more than just friends” you said

He stiffened for a moment “you do?” He asked turning to look at you

You look back at him and nod

“I-I” he started but took a breath “I love you too, more than just a friend”

“You do?” You asked

“Yes, I have for a while” he said and he reaches into his bedside table and pulled out a letter and handed it to you

“What’s this?” You asked

“Read it” he said

You open the letter and read it;

'My dear,

We’ve been friends for as long as I remember and I’ve never been good with words; but I want you to know I cherish our friendship, but lately I find myself wanting more, I want to hold your hand when we are walking together, not just around town but at school too, I want to hold you in my arms when we have our weekly sleep overs, to wear my volleyball jacket when you come to my games. I guess I’m saying that I want you to be my girlfriend. I’ve loved you for a while now and it’s taken me this long to tell you how I feel.

-Love your Bear’

“I’ll gladly be your girlfriend” you said as tears fell down your cheeks

He wiped away your tears and kissed your forehead. You look up at him and lean towards him and gently kiss his lips, he kissed you back gently before pulling away smiling. You smile back and cuddle up to him as he gently plays with your fingers and his hand in yours. The both of you end up falling asleep cuddling.

A few weeks later, you’re getting ready, Saeko is picking you up to take you with her to a training camp to surprise Aone. You hear her honking and you run out and climb in handing Hinata your bag.

“Okay go” you said

“Are you excited?” Saeko asked

“Of course I am” you said “I’m always excited to see my boyfriend”

“Dont you see him every day?” Hinata asked

“Yep but he doesn’t know that I’m coming” you said smiling

About 45 minutes later and nearly dying from Saekos insane driving three times you finally arrive at the training camp, the first ones out are Hinata and Kageyama. Then you and Saeko got out walking towards the gym where the teams were taking a short break between games. The next team’s going up were Date Tech and Karasuno. Kiyoko and Yachi see you first.

“You came!” Yachi said smiling as she runs over and hugs you

“Saeko picked me up” you said and hug her back

“Good, we needed a few other girls” Kiyoko said smiling taking her hug

“Please, shes ditching us for her boyfriend” Saeko said rolling her eyes playfully

“Boyfriend?” Nishinoya asked “this beautiful goddess has a boyfriend?”

“Yep” you said smiling

“Who?” He asked

“Watch” Yachi said

Just then Date Tech walked over and you smile as you see your boyfriends eyes widen seeing you here. You run up to him jumping into his waiting arms wrapping your arms around his neck as he held your thighs, giving him a kiss on the cheek

“Hey” he said softly

“Hey baby” you said smiling hugging him tightly

He was holding you close not paying any attention to the stares from the other teams. As they watched the iron wall be soft for his girlfriend. He sets you back down on your feet, but holds your hand.

“Come meet my friends” you said he nods and follows you over, “this is, Kiyoko, Yachi and Saeko, kiyoko and yachi are Karasunos managers and Saeko is Tanakas older sister”

“Hi” he said “I’m Aone”

“Oh we know a lot about you” Saeko said smirking at you “this one talks about you all the time”

“Saeko I do not” you said blushing deep red

“Except you do” Kiyoko said

You whine a little bit embarrassed and hide your face in Aones chest. He starts stroking your hair.

“Its fine dear, I dont mind you talking about me” he said.

“Aone were about to start” Futakuchi said calling him over

“Go, good luck” you said

He lets you go and kisses your lips quickly before running back over to his team.

“Its definitely safe to say that you’re in love with him” Kiyoko said

“Yes I am” you said smiling watching your boyfriend getting ready to play

“So should we expect wedding invitations after you graduate?” Saeko asked in a teasing tone

“Maybe” you said blushing.