#i will be eating super noodle so i can see my crush he had better appreciate this

[kingexpl0sionmurder]

Mutual Misunderstandings - Kirishima Eijirou - Smut

Author: @kingexpl0sionmurder​​ Pairing: Kirishima Eijirou / F!Reader Rating: 18+ (Contains smut) Words: 5,866 Warnings: Quirkless AU, Aged up characters (they adulty adults!), unprotected vaginal sex, oral (male receiving), very very light choking, reader has a bit of a size kink. AN: Another entry for the BNHAREM collab! This time we’re writing roommates, and I somehow managed to snag Kirishima! I’m super excited for all of the fics coming this time around, so make sure you click on the link below and read some of the other submissions!

This is my first time writing Kirishima and I’m super nervous about it. I’ve always really loved him because he’s just the best boy and he’s so brave and strong and gentle and I just want to cuddle him into oblivion. I also firmly believe he’s going to be a huge tank of a man when he gets older and I’m going with that vision of him here.

Collab Masterlist is HERE My Masterlist is HERE Buy me a KoFi if you’re feeling froggy HERE

------

You stood in your living room, your jaw hanging open, staring at him in shock. Kirishima had a similar look on his face, the two of you pointing at each other like that Spider-Man meme. 

“You mean to tell me you’ve had a crush on me this whole time?” You finally choked out, blinking owlishly at your best friend and roommate. “I thought you liked Mina!”

Kirishima sputtered, shaking his head. “No way! She’s my friend, we’ve known each other since middle school, you know that.” He moved to cross his arms across his broad chest. “And anyway, there’s no way you like me, you have a crush on Bakugou!”

There was no way this was happening right now. “No! I don’t like Bakugou like that! He’s a pain in my fucking ass, and I think about murdering him on a daily basis.” Facepalming, you groaned. “Are we really this stupid?”

How did you end up here?

It started back in your first year of college. 

The parties and the seemingly endless studying had become a comfortable routine for you. So what if you were sleep-deprived and living on cup noodles? You were getting your higher education and ready to tackle the real world head-on in just a few short years.

A pipe dream, but still.

You had your best friend Shinsou by your side and a customer loyalty card at the campus coffee shop and everything was right with the world. You’d even managed to get paired up with Hitoshi’s (sort of) boyfriend for an English project, which was a better outcome than what you could have hoped for, not having to work with some rando on something that would be a large chunk of your grade.

Kaminari had suggested that you work on it at his place with the promise of Doritos, and you agreed. Who were you to turn down snacks? Poor college students needed those cheese dusted carbs to survive. 

The Upsilon Alpha fraternity was one of the best and most popular on campus, and at first, you found it almost laughable that Kaminari was a member. At first glance, he seemed like a total space cadet stoner who didn’t belong in college, much less as a member of such an esteemed frat. However, after getting to know him, you knew that he was most definitely all of those things, but he was also insanely smart when it counted and kept above average grades in his classes (except for math, but with him being a bisexual disaster human, it came with the territory).

You had made some decent progress on your project after about an hour. The outline was done, and you were discussing how you would be presenting it since you had a choice between a written essay or a PowerPoint presentation. 

Without warning, the kitchen door flew open, the doorknob slamming into the wall behind it.

“Well, the quiet was nice while it lasted, huh?” Kaminari blinked, completely unfazed by the commotion, leaning back in his chair and eating a chip.

Your gaze flitted over to the man who was glaring at the two of you from the doorway, his hands shoved in his pockets. Blonde hair that looked so much like an explosion was sticking up in every direction on his head, and you felt his red eyes trained on you as he took in the room. “What are you doing, Dunceface?”

Kaminari didn’t answer right away, raising his eyebrow and grinning at the new arrival. “Hey, Kacchan.”

If the bulging vein in the man’s forehead was any indication, Kaminari had said the wrong thing. He opened his mouth, and you assumed it was to threaten your project partner, but he was interrupted by a hand on his shoulder from behind.

“Bakubro, be nice. Kami has company.” 

The man that appeared beyond the angry pomeranian took your breath away. He was...big. Like, his shoulders were so wide you wondered how he was going to fit through the doorway. And he was tall, with spiked red hair making him look even taller, big red eyes and sharp teeth, and the most beautiful smile you’d ever laid eyes on.

Blonde and grumpy grumbled, moving aside to let giant and red into the room, who then turned that megawatt million-dollar smile on you, and you tried your best not to stare at his biceps or the way his shirt clung to his chest.

Was it hot in here all of a sudden?

“Hi! I’m Kirishima, and this ray of sunshine is Bakugou, we’re some of Kaminari’s frat brothers!” He held out his hand for you to shake, and you smiled up at him, taking his giant hand in yours. The size of his fingers sent your brain reeling, and you knew you needed to get yourself under control before you started moaning out loud in front of him. 

“I’m Y/N, it’s nice to meet you! Kami and I are just working on an English project.” You explained, grinning back up at him, trying to keep the lust off of your face. You didn’t want to look like some kind of freak.

He took his hand back and crossed his arms over his chest. “Oh, you must be Shinsou’s friend! Kami told us you’d be coming over, I forgot about that.” He turned, watching as Bakugou slunk over to the fridge and opened the door. “Don’t let us bother you, we’re just grabbing some water before we head to the gym.”

Kaminari snorted. “Dude, if you get any beefier we’re going to need to remodel the doors so you can fit through them.”

Kirishima turned as red as his hair, glancing at you, before he grinned at his friend. “If I stop, no one will be able to bench press you and Sero at the same time at the next party.”

“Bro, that is my favorite party trick of yours.” He sat up straighter, looking forlorn at the thought of it not happening anymore. “Okay, fine, go to the gym.”

Bakugou grumbled from behind him something that sounded like “I could bench press four of you if I wanted to.”

“Of course you could, buddy.” Kirishima slung his arm over Bakugou’s shoulder. “Okay, we’re out of here. It was nice to meet you, Y/N. Good luck with your project!”

Bakugou grunted and shoved a water bottle at Kirishima, shrugging out from under his arm and leaving the room. Kirishima smiled at you when you said goodbye, hurrying after his sour-faced friend and leaving you and Kaminari to your work.

“Your housemates are...interesting.” You managed, still trying to wrap your head around the red-haired man.

Kaminari snorted. “Kirishima is the walking definition of sunshine, and Bakugou is...well, he takes some getting used to. But he’s not a bad guy.”

You just hummed, chewing on your pen absently. “Can he actually bench press you?”

“Fuck yeah. He does it one-handed. You should come to our next party and see for yourself.”

Keeping your face as neutral as possible, you nodded. “Maybe I can convince Shinsou to come with me.” Wiggling your eyebrows at Kaminari when he blushed, you turned back to the notebook that lay open in front of you. “Come on, let’s figure this out so we can talk more about your intentions with my best friend.”

--

You did show up to the next UA frat party, Shinsou in tow. Your purple-haired bestie was grumbling the whole way, his hands shoved in his pockets. It didn’t stop him from making fun of how short your skirt was and teasing you about how you’d done nothing but talk about Kirishima since the day you’d met him.

“He’s like Clifford the Big Red Dog, Y/N. Clumsy and adorable.”

“He’s definitely big. I’d like to climb him like a tree.” You linked your arm with his, walking up to the giant house, the windows already rattling with the bass pumping through the speakers inside.

“You’re disgusting. I am appalled and also proud to call you my best friend.” Sarcastic as usual, he let you drag him along without a fuss.

“That sounds about right.”

The party was in full swing, half the campus milling around inside the house with red plastic cups in hand. You found Kaminari almost immediately, shoving Shinsou towards him and making your way to the kitchen to find yourself a drink. 

“Y/N!” Kirishima was in front of you almost immediately, giant cat eyes and his shark tooth smile lighting up the room. “Kami mentioned you might show up!”

Blushing, you nodded, suddenly losing the ability to form words. He was wearing a tank top, his arm muscles on display, and you took a moment to thank the Lord for the blessing before you. 

“You want a drink?” 

You realized you were staring, so you cleared your throat and smiled at him. “Yes, please.”

His large hand wrapped around your elbow gently as he tugged you through the crowd in the kitchen and out towards the back porch. You tried not to think about how your skin was burning under his touch. You needed to get a grip.

He got to work on the keg, pumping the handle on the top and grabbing you a cup, tilting it a bit as he filled it with beer. 

“Hey, shitty hair! Beer pong!” You turned to see Bakugou standing on the other side of the large wooden deck, his arm resting on the shoulder of a tall and lanky brown-haired boy. “Sero here wants to break up the dream team! Find a partner!”

Kirishima chuckled, shaking his head. “Yeah, hang on!” He turned to you, handing you your drink. “So, you play beer pong?”

Bringing the cup to your lips, you tilted your head back and chugged your beer, wiping your mouth off with the back of your hand when you’d finished. Kirishima was staring at you with wide eyes, looking surprised but pleased. “Yeah. I’m better when I’m drunk, though.”

He held out his hand for the empty cup, moving to fill it up again, his grin never faltering. “Let’s go kick their asses.”

--

That was the beginning of your friendship with Kirishima. What had started as a crush on the red-haired man had turned into a companionship that you couldn’t ever see yourself without. That was why you never said a word about how you really felt.

As cliché as it was, you didn’t know how you’d survived without the guy. He was nothing short of amazing. He was a great listener, and he gave good advice. He was always there when you needed him, bringing you soup when you were sick, going on late-night snack runs when you were up all night studying for exams, showing up with chocolate and tampons when it was your time of the month.

Shinsou had always done those things for you, but he was spending a lot of time with his boyfriend now. You weren’t upset about it though, you thought they were the cutest and you didn’t want to third wheel their time together, so you hung out with Kirishima and Bakugou a lot more often. 

As Kaminari had told you on that first day, Bakugou truly wasn’t a bad guy. His attitude got on your nerves though, and you envisioned punching him in the face at least four times a day, but you didn’t dislike him. He and Kirishima were best friends, so he was a part of the package, and you learned to deal with him.

So it was a no-brainer when Kirishima and Bakugou approached you and asked if you wanted to get an apartment with them once you’d graduated. With the three of you living together, you were able to afford a nicer apartment than you’d ever dreamed of having that was in a central location and only a few train stops away from where your respective jobs were located.

Things were going well, and you’d done a decent job of keeping your true feelings for Kirishima to yourself. It helped that he’d never dated anyone, and you were free to lust after him quietly, under the impression that no one had caught on to how you really felt, perfectly content to continue as you had been since the day you’d met him. 

The only wrench in your plans of quiet pining was Mina Ashido.

Mina was awesome, and you loved her to pieces. She was one of the only other females in your friend group and had been around since you’d gotten closer to the boys in the frat that first year of college. She was the perfect person to go to when you needed some self-care nights, always down to put on a face mask and paint your nails, and she was the best shopping partner.

However, you were thoroughly convinced that Kirishima liked her. 

You’d noticed, as far back as your freshman year, how they always gravitated towards each other in social settings. Mina was always one of the last ones to leave when you went out back then, always the one Kirishima threw his arm around when you walked back to campus from the bar.

It was part of the reason you’d become close with Bakugou in the first place. Whenever Kiri was with Mina, you always sidled up to the explosive blonde, teasing him to distract yourself from the way your heart was squeezing in your chest. 

Neither of them had ever mentioned having more than just a platonic, friendly relationship with each other, but you couldn’t shake the feeling you got whenever you saw them together.

It’s called jealousy, you idiot.

You had nothing to be jealous about though. Kirishima was your friend, and that’s all he would ever be.

--

Things had been going well, at least that’s what you’d thought. And then this morning had happened.

It was Saturday, which was your normal grocery shopping day. You and Bakugou had taken on the burden of shopping for groceries for the apartment. You’d allowed Kirishima to go once and he came home with more junk food than should be allowed in one cart, and half of the things on the list you’d given him missing, and more protein powder than should be legally allowed.

Bakugou had worked out a system and your grocery shopping trips were like a well-oiled machine that took no longer than an hour out of your day, and you were grateful for your grumpy friend and his penchant for being overly organized.

You finished getting dressed, ready to get this over with so you could use the rest of the day to play video games and be generally lazy. Walking into the living room, you stopped in your tracks to see your roommates glaring at each other, which was normal for one of them, and uncharacteristic for the other.

“Everything okay?” Your eyes darted between the two men, taking in Kirishima’s stiff posture and clenched jaw. 

“Fine. I’m going shopping alone today.” Bakugou grunted, turning away from his best friend.

Puzzled, you frowned. “What? Why?”

Bakugou stopped in the doorway, turning to face the both of you, looking thoroughly fed up. He lifted his hand and pointed. “The two of you are making me want to commit myself. I’ve been dealing with this shit for years, and it ends today. You’re in love with each other. Figure your shit out and fuck already. I’ll be out for the rest of the day.”

You gaped after him as he turned again, giving you both the middle finger over his shoulder as he left, the door slamming shut behind him.

And that brings us up to speed.

“Are we really this stupid?” You asked, shutting your eyes and leaning your head back.

Kirishima sighed. “This doesn’t make any sense. Since when?”

Snorting, you flopped down on the couch, rubbing at your face tiredly. “Truthfully? Since the moment we met.” You guessed the cat was out of the bag, so you might as well tell him everything. “In the kitchen at the frat house.”

“When you came over to work on that project with Denki?” His eyebrows furrowed, an adorably confused look on his face. “Are you telling me I’ve been pushing you at Bakugou for nearly 5 years for no reason?”

“Yeah, you could stop doing that at any time and I would appreciate it. Unless you want me to strangle him to death.”

Kirishima flopped down on the other end of the couch, his shoulders slumping in defeat. “I’ve liked you just as long, you know? I saw you sitting in our kitchen and I thought I was going to throw up.”

“If that was supposed to make me feel good about myself then you’ve failed miserably.”

“No! I just mean, the butterflies-” He groaned. “Shut up and let me get this out okay?” 

Smirking at him, you turned your body, leaning against the back of the couch. “Okay, sorry, keep going.”

Taking a deep breath, he continued, red eyes trained on your face. “Do you remember the frat party?”

“Which one?”

“That first one, when you chugged that beer in front of me and then helped me kick Bakugou’s ass at beer pong?” He waited for you to nod before he spoke again. “I’d never felt so enamored with anyone in my entire life.” Kirishima let his gaze fall to his hands. “You were so awesome and funny and beautiful and you kept up with my friends and their dumbass antics like a pro and I just...I couldn’t believe you were real. I just kept telling myself that you would never be into someone like me, so I decided that if we could be friends for life then that would be enough.”

“Ei…” You trailed off, frowning. You’d always known he tended to get down on himself. You and Bakugou had done your best to convince him he was worth much more than he let himself believe, but sometimes he needed a reminder.

“I know, I know. I don’t feel that way anymore, but at the time I did.” His hair was down, tied back in a loose bun, bits of his fringe falling in his eyes. He pushed a piece of it behind his ear and kept going. “So I tried to keep my distance, kept on hanging around with Mina, tried not to think about how much I wanted to be with you. She kept telling me I needed to tell you, kept rubbing it in that I wasn’t being manly about it. But you were hanging out with Bakugou so much I just figured you liked him and I didn’t want to get in the way.”

Closing your eyes, you let your head fall forward. “I was hanging out with Bakugou because I couldn’t stand seeing you with Mina so much. I was jealous.” Realization hit, and your eyes snapped open. “Mina knew?”

“Yeah, she’s the only one I told.”

“All those times we hung out and she never said a word.” Chuckling, you shook your head. “I told Shinsou. It’s like the only secret he’s ever kept from Kaminari. I threatened to mutilate him beyond all recognition if he mentioned a word to anyone.” You grinned sheepishly at him.

Kirishima huffed a laugh. “You’ve been spending way too much time with Bakugou. Your threats are just as creative as his.”

“Speaking of, I guess he figured it out on his own then.”

Humming, he shrugged. “He was always the smartest one out of all of us.” He looked over at you again. “So, now it’s your turn.”

Raising an eyebrow, you blinked at him. “For what? A heartfelt confession?” 

“It’s only fair. I told you how I felt. What did you think when you first met me?”

You felt your ears get hot. “Do you want the truth? Because it’s kind of embarrassing.”

Shifting himself on the couch, he leaned against the arm, tanned forearms resting on his knees. “Oh, this should be good.” He teased, grinning.

“Shut up.” You sighed, preparing yourself for his reaction. “When you walked into the kitchen that day, my first thoughts were...uh...pretty dirty. Like X rated.”

Eyes wide, he stared at you. “Really? How dirty are we talking here?”

You covered your face with your hands, mumbling your answer behind them.

“Sorry, what was that?” He was fucking with you again, you could hear the smirk in his voice, and you were tempted to smack him with a throw pillow.

Taking a deep breath, you moved your hands from your face, looking him right in the eye. “I said, I wanted you to step on me.”

Sputtering, he blinked a few times. “What?”

“I mean, you were this...tank, Eijirou. Like this giant man with gorgeous eyes and a killer smile, with the personality of fucking sunshine and you had these big hands and I wanted you to wrap them around my throat and-”

“Whoa whoa whoa, seriously?” His cheeks were as red as his hair, his hands flailing as he stopped your tirade. “You wanted me to…?

Nodding solemnly, you looked him dead in the eyes. “Yes, and I’ve thought about that like every day since then.” 

“I am learning things about you today that I never even imagined.” Blowing a breath out he slumped back, looking shook.

You hurried on, wanting him to know it was more than that. “I mean, after that I got to know you and I love everything about you, Ei. I just, you’re such a good person, better than I could ever be. You care about everyone and you’re always there for me, for all of us, whenever we need you. You’re strong and funny and brave. I always know that I can rely on you.” Sniffling, you couldn’t help the emotions bubbling to the surface. 

“But you also want me to step on you.” He was grinning, his eyes a little wet, too.

Wiping at your eyes with your fingers, you chuckled. “Yes, exactly.”

Sighing, he leaned forward, grabbing your arm and tugging. “Come here.”

Crawling across the couch, you laid down between his parted legs, your head resting on his chest. He wrapped his giant arms around you and kissed the top of your head. 

“Now what?” You asked, realizing you were afraid of the answer. What happened now?

He hummed, and you heard the sound vibrate through his chest. “I was going to suggest a nap, but now I keep thinking about what you said…”

You lifted up to ask what he meant, shifting your body and freezing when you felt something hard brush against your thigh. Eyes meeting his, you bit your lip at the look on his face, feeling a blush creep over your face and down your neck. “Yeah?”

“I figured we can do things out of order a little bit, right? I’m going to take you on a real date and court you properly, like a gentleman and all that, but right now all I can think about is, well…” He sat up, grabbing you around the waist and lifting you like it was nothing, until you were sitting properly on his lap, straddling his hips. When he was satisfied, his hand moved to your throat, putting the smallest amount of pressure on the sides of your neck with his calloused fingertips.

The moan that tore from your throat was low and quiet, but he heard it, muttering a curse under his breath as you became nearly boneless in his lap. “Eijriou.” You managed, licking your lips and gazing at him through half-closed eyes, your blood pounding in your ears.

It was ridiculous how turned on you were in that moment, and he’d barely done a thing. You felt his cock twitch beneath you, and you couldn’t help but grind down on him, the small amount of friction making you shiver.

Suddenly he was guiding you towards him, your noses bumping and breath mingling as he held you in place, his lips just out of your reach. “You don’t know how much I’ve always wanted you, Y/N.” 

Letting your eyes slide closed, you ran your hands up his muscled arms and rested them on his shoulders to keep yourself upright. You were tired of waiting, of keeping yourself from what you wanted. “Show me.”

If you were to die right here on this couch it would have all been worth it. The feeling of his lips on yours, the way he ran his thumb lightly over your throat as he kissed you, had your eyes rolling back in their sockets. You couldn’t get enough of the taste of him, of the feeling of his hard body beneath your fingertips. He was careful with his sharp teeth, tugging at your bottom lip lightly, your tongues sliding together as he rolled his hips against yours.

You pulled back for air finally, taking in his kiss bruised lips and dilated pupils. Reaching down, you tore your shirt over your head, tossing it across the room, never breaking eye contact. You watched his gaze fall to your heaving chest as he worried at his bottom lip for a moment, obviously lost in thought. 

Before you could ask him what he was thinking about, he’d shifted again so that his feet were on the floor. Kirishima lifted you off his lap and put you on your feet in front of him, hands moving to your waist, fingers slipping into the elastic of the leggings you were wearing. He pressed his face to your bare stomach, kissing your skin as he worked your pants down your thighs, slipping them past your knees. You played with his hair, moaning softly as he kissed along your hip.

When he sat back you stepped out of your leggings, feeling exposed. You forgot how to be awkward when he was looking at you like that, hungry and wanting. Stepping forward, you pouted. “Why am I the only one half-naked?”

Chuckling, he pulled his shirt off, and you sucked in a breath, trying to wrap your head around the fact that this man, with a chiseled and perfect body like a Greek god, wanted you.

You didn’t even have time to admire him, because he was moving again, pulling you closer by your thighs, sharp teeth hooking into the front of your panties and dragging them down. Tugging the tie out of his hair, you slid it on your wrist, letting your fingers card through his red locks. He let his hands do the rest of the work until the offending garment was tangled around your ankles. 

Pushing him away gently, you watched him settle back on the couch, red eyes gazing at you as you reached back to unclasp your bra, letting it fall to the floor, finally fully exposed to him. Kirishima sucked in a breath, blinking a few times in disbelief. “God, you’re so beautiful.”

You kicked your panties to the side, moving to kneel in front of him, reaching up to grasp the top of his grey sweats, mouth-watering when you started to tug them down. Kirishima was huge everywhere else, so the size of his cock was of no surprise to you. He was massive, long, and girthy, and you couldn’t wait to feel him inside you, stuffing you full.

Rubbing your thighs together for some relief, you left his sweats around his ankles, leaning forward and grasping his cock in your hand. It was almost comical how small your hands looked compared to it. Your eyes locked with his as you licked a long stripe up the shaft, tracing along the prominent vein on the underside, and lapping at the precum dripping from the head. 

Kirishima’s head fell back to rest on the cushion behind him, his fingers tangling in your hair as you took him into your mouth. Your jaw ached almost immediately as you did your best to swallow all of him down, willing your throat to relax. You’d spent so long thinking about how he would taste and sound as you sucked his soul out through his dick, you were going to make the most out of this moment. 

His breathy pants filled the room, along with the obscene slurping sounds of your mouth around his cock. Gripping your hair and tugging lightly, you could tell he was holding back, his thighs shaking with the effort to keep from fucking up into your face. You pulled off, opening your mouth to let him know he could wreck you however he wanted, but he had other plans.

“Come up here, baby.”

The pet name sent shivers through you as you stood up, straddling his lap, his cock pressed up against his stomach. His thumb brushed over your lips, wiping away the spit and pre that spilled down your chin. Cradling your face in his large palm, he pulled you forward and kissed you deeply, his free hand sliding between your bodies. Thick fingers parted your folds, and you lifted up on your knees to give him better access. You moaned into his mouth as he brushed over your clit, gathering the dripping wetness of your cunt along his digits and sliding one finger inside your hole.

You clenched around him, breaking the kiss and keening loudly, your hips involuntarily bucking against his hand. His finger pumped in and out, curling slightly and pressing against your inner walls, stretching you. Gripping your hip with his other hand, he kissed his way down your jaw to your neck and chest, tongue flicking out over your nipple, hot breath ghosting over your skin with a chuckle when you grabbed his head and pulled him towards you.  

One finger turned to two and then three as you rocked and mewled in pleasure, his thumb finding your clit again and pressing against the bundle of nerves, whispered praises reaching your ears as he sucked and bit at your breasts. You were on the edge, wanting to fall over and drown in him, needing to cum all over his fingers and then again on his cock, wanting nothing more than to feel this way forever. 

“Ei I’m gonna…” You panted, unable to form the words.

Grunting, he moved his fingers faster, pressing his thumb in a little harder, his words of praise streaming steadily, telling you how good you were, how pretty you looked. Eyes rolling back, your body tensed, a moan in the sound of his name leaving your lips as you shook, cumming harder than you ever had in your life. 

You were still clenching when he pulled his fingers out of you, his hand slick with release as he tugged on his cock and lined it up with your entrance, your body mourning the loss for mere seconds before he was filling you again. The slick glide of your arousal had you taking nearly all of him, the two of you groaning in tandem at the feeling. Gripping his shoulders, you lifted slightly, slamming your hips back down and taking him to the hilt. The stretch was just on the edge of painful, but his thick digits had stretched you just enough that the pleasure superseded any discomfort.

Still trying to gather yourself after your orgasm, you took a moment to breathe, studying his face, your gaze tracing over the scar on his eyelid, and his dark lashes fanning over his cheeks. An hour ago you never could have imagined you’d be here, panting shakily, drenched in sweat and skin to skin with your best friend and roommate. 

Clenching around him, you held his shoulders, rocking forward and lifting yourself slightly. Kirishima gripped your hips, fucking up into you in a steady rhythm, his lips finding yours once again to swallow the panting moans leaving you. You bounced on his cock, relishing the feeling as he kissed down your neck, his fingertips digging into your flesh, sure to leave bruises for you to admire the next day.

You weren’t sure how much time had passed, but it didn’t even matter. Just being this close to him, feeling him filling you so completely after wanting him for so long, it could have been minutes and you’d be happy. Knowing he felt for you as strongly as you felt for him was enough. 

His fingers trailed along your front and dipped in between your bodies to rub your clit again, and you felt the pleasure race down your spine, coil tightening again and ready to break. “Oh fuck, Eijirou!”

Growling, he grunted your name as his hips snapped up to meet yours, chasing his release. “I love you, Y/N.”

His words tipped you over again, your breath catching as you came, the wet sounds of his cock plunging into you increasing as you gushed around him. You buried your face in the crook of his neck, completely spent. You held onto him as he slammed into you a few more times, rhythm faltering and hips stuttering until he was filling you up with a loud groan.

Collapsing back onto the couch, he held you to his chest, the two of you gasping for air. It was quiet for a few minutes as he rubbed his palm along your back comfortingly. You felt relaxed and sated, a pleased smile making its way to your face when you thought about what he’d said.

“Hey, Ei?” You pulled back slightly to look at him, giggling when he peeked one eye open to gaze at you.

“You okay?”

“Mm. I just wanted to tell you that I love you, too.”

He looked sheepish, opening both eyes and biting his lip. “I didn’t mean to tell you like that. I wanted it to be romantic.”

“That was plenty romantic, Eijirou.” Rolling your eyes fondly, you shifted in his lap. “I’m just happy to hear you say it.”

“Man, we did this all wrong. I should have at least taken you to dinner first. This is so unmanly of me, I just couldn’t help it.” He frowned. “I’m sorry-”

“You’re too good sometimes, Ei. I’m not complaining, am I?” You raised an eyebrow. “We should go get cleaned up before Bakugou comes home and finds out we fucked on the couch.”

“Please don’t talk about Bakugou while you’re sitting on my dick.” He made a face that caused you to bust into gasping laughter. 

“Oh my god, I can’t.” You wheezed. “You’re ridiculous.” You moved to get up and he stopped you.

With a serious look on his face, he pushed your hair away from your face, his hand lingering near your ear. “I do love you though, Y/N. And I’m glad we finally got here. I didn’t think we ever would.”

Expression softening, you leaned into his palm, smiling at him. “Me too.”

Maybe if you had just told him how you felt all those years ago, you would have been able to have this sooner. But you promised yourself that you wouldn’t dwell on the past, deciding to focus on the future, because you knew it would be filled with more moments with him just like this.

[lancermylove]

Troublesome Brothers (HC)

Fandom: Obey Me

Pairing: All x Reader, Luke platonic.

Warning: None

Requested by: Anon

Prompt: Can you do one where a female mc is like exhausted from having to fix all the brothers problems so they're just sleeping for like a week straight. How would the brothers react? And... Maybe the undateables if you can! Thank you 😁😁

A/N: This request is great but poor MC!  I can imagine the game having an event like this. 😂

———————————————

Lucifer

Who do I need to punish!? 

Then a line of questions follows. Who would tire you out to this point? Is Devildom getting to you? Does he need to send you back to your world? What will he tell Diavolo?

Lucifer doesn't know where to start, but then Simeon hints that he and his brothers are the reason behind your fatigue.

He swallows his pride and let's guilt take over. How could he be so careless? He's supposed to be watching over you, yet...

Lucifer calls his brothers for an emergency meeting and explains the situation to them. All the demons feel guilty and decide to write an apology letter to you. 

Once you wake up, Lucifer hands you the letters and asks you to take it easy for the time being.

If any of his brothers dare to fight in front of you, he will glare them down until they shrink into a corner. 

Mammon

OH MY DEVIL, SHE IS DEAD!

Mammon runs around the House of Lamentation crying and calling his brothers while yelling that you're dead. 

All the demons drop everything and rush to your room. Lucifer checks on you while Satan hits Mammon upside the head for scaring them.

Once he learns that you're just sleeping, he calms down a bit but is still worried. 

Mammon waits for you to wake up next to your bed. He doesn't even leave the room to sleep or eat. Beel has to bring him food half-eaten food. 

When you wake up, he greets you with a bone-crushing hug and tears in his eyes. Then he asks if you're okay and what happened. He adds that he was afraid that he lost you.

If you choose to tell him the truth, he will be upset at himself for letting this happen to you. Mammon will promise that he will not cause you any trouble. 

He doesn't tell you this, but Mammon got into a habit of watching you sleep. So sometimes, at night, he sneaks into your room and sleeps there. 

Levi

NO NO NO NO NO!!! This can't be happening! 

Levi starts panicking, then freezes, then starts panicking again. Blood is rushing to his mind, and he feels dizzy. 

Did I do something to hurt her? Did someone else hurt her? Did I keep her up too late? Maybe I shouldn’t have forced her to watch me play video games the entire night! 

Levi sits against your bedframe with his knees to his chest, holding his head in his hands. 

Only when his brothers come to check on you does he learn that you are just sleeping. 

When you wake up, Levi is restlessly pacing around the room. As soon as he sees you awake, he nearly throws his arms around you but then blushes and backs away. 

"Normie, can't you take care of yourself? You had all of us worried."  

No matter how much he pressures you to tell him the reason behind your tiredness, please don’t say a word. Levi will not be able to handle the truth, so spare the poor demon.

Asmo

Oh no! My lovely sweetie is not waking up!

Asmo is truly worried about your health. Your skin will be well-rested, but not washing cleaning your skin will cause issues. 

You will no longer be tired, but your muscles will stiffen. You need to eat to survive, so not eating is going to be an issue. 

Asmo already feels wrinkles appearing on his skin from worrying so much. He asks Solomon for help, much to Lucifer's dismay. 

When you wake up, Asmo immediately apologizes to you and tells you that you need to take better care of yourself. 

"If you don't care for yourself, then you won't be able to care for us!"

Asmo becomes your partner in crime from then on. Whenever his brothers cause issues, he tries to help you, so that you don't take on too much stress. 

Satan

WHY ISN'T SHE WAKING UP? WHOSE NECK DO I NEED TO SNAP!?

His rage gets to him, and Satan nearly wipes out half of Devildom. Thankfully, Lucifer, Beel, and Diavolo are about to stop him. 

While the eldest brother searches for answers, Satan stays in your room and looks at you.

A thought crosses his mind...will a true loves kiss wake her up? Humans and angels are going to school in hell, so it's not a farfetched idea, right?

Wrong.

He kisses you, but you continue to sleep. Satan has never felt this embarrassed in his life. 

"I need to stop reading romantic novels." 

He is thankful that none of his brothers are there to witness this moment; otherwise, they won't let him live it down. 

Satan patiently waits for you to wake up, and when you do, he can't look in the eyes. One thought keeps racing in his mind: what if she finds out I kissed her while she was asleep? 

Beel

When Beel hears that you have not woken up for a whole day, he runs into your room and flings open the door so hard that it rips from the hinges. 

He tries to wake you up by shaking you, hugging you, asking you to wake up, and even offering you your favorite food. 

Beel gets so worried that he binge eats more than usual. He even eats inedible objects. 

When you open your eyes, you see Satan sitting on the edge of your bed. He tells you to hurry and get ready. 

"Beel has been eating so much that all the grocery stores in Devildom are out of food. Now, he is trying...no...I am sure he has already started eating Diavolo's castle. Only you can stop him." 

Belphie

She's not waking up? Great, I have a nap partner!

Belphie takes this chance to nap with you every day. He is worried about you, but what better way to watch over you than sleeping by your side? 

Belphie learns from Beel that the brothers are the reason for your condition. He makes up his mind that he's going to force you to nap with him daily. That way you can at least get some rest, and he can use that as an excuse to spend more alone time with you.

His brothers ask him to leave you alone, but Belphie doesn't listen to them. He doesn't want to miss this chance to snuggle with you. 

When you wake up, you see Belphie's face in front of you. He is fast asleep with his arms wrapped around your waist. 

Diavolo

She hasn't woken up in days? YOU TELL ME THIS NOW?

Diavolo drops everything and visits you. After seeing your exhausted face, he asks Barbatos to cancel all his meetings and appointments. 

The King of Demons carries you back to the castle and asks the best doctors to attend to you. On the side, he also asks Barbatos to look into the situation.

When the demon butler informs him about the reason, Diavolo isn't sure how to react. He is angry, but he doesn't want to point fingers without getting your perspective first. So, he holds back on taking action until you wake up.

When you open your eyes, you see Diavolo's large form cuddling with you. He looks like an angel a puppy while sleeping. 

Diavolo mumbles something in his sleep. Something along the lines of “(Y/N), wake up soon...I love you". 

Barbatos

Oh dear, I was hoping this would not happen.

When you last visited Diavolo's castle, Barbatos noticed that you were exhausted. He even asked if you were alright, but you brushed his concerns aside. 

It didn't take him long to learn the reason behind your fatigue, and the demon butler was unhappy, to say the least. 

After getting permission from Diav, Barbatos shifts you to the castle.  

Once you are settled in the castle, the butler sends the brothers a basket of their favorite foods along with a note saying to take care of themselves. 

The brothers are delighted to eat their favorites, but their excitement diminishes as soon as they put the first bite into their mouths. 

The flavors of the food are completely opposite; Asmo's wicked cupcake is super spicy; Mammon's spicy noodles are sickeningly sweet; Belphie's sushi has nothing but wasabi...

While the brothers are shell-shocked, Barbatos watches them through a window with a smile. 

“This is just the beginning.” He chuckles before heading back to the castle to tend to you.

Simeon

I should have stopped her from pushing herself too hard. 

Immediately comes to see you when Asmo tells him that you haven't woken up in two days. 

You told him that you were tired and hinted that your fatigue was a result of helping the brothers and worrying about them. So why didn't he stop you?

Simeon feels immensely guilty for not catching your hint. 

He asks Lucifer if he can take you to Purgatory Hall. When the demon agrees, Simeon decides to tell Lucifer the truth. 

By no means does Simeon blame the demons, but he asks Lucifer to give you a break. 

When you wake up, you see Simeon sitting on a chair next to your bed. His head resting on your bed, and his hand gently holding onto yours. 

Luke enters the room and is happy to see you awake. He tells you that Simeon hasn't slept in the past few days as the angel was too worried about you. 

Luke

SEE DEMONS ARE BAD! 

Luke is upset with the brothers and blames them for your condition. Simeon has to hold him back. 

The young angel tells the demons that you're much safer in Purgatory Hall, so henceforth, you will be staying with them. 

Luke asks Simeon to carry you back to their dorm. When the brothers protest, the angel says demons are not to be trusted.

When you wake up, you see Luke sitting next to you, watching you with sad puppy eyes.

The angel immediately throws his arms around you and says, you're in a safe place now. He also promises that neither he nor Simeon will cause you any problems.

Luke asks if you are hungry and hands you a plate of your favorite sweets. 

Solomon

Solomon is shocked and considers using a potion to wake you up. But when he sees you resting well, he reconsiders. 

As a punishment for the troubles they caused you, Solomon comes to visit you every day and causes a few mishaps here and there.

He also makes sure to irk some of the brothers Lucifer in the process. 

If Lucifer asks him to leave, Solomon taunts him by saying someone has to care for you since you're too busy sorting out OTHER people's problems. 

When you wake up, your entire room is filled with firefly-like orbs and your favorite flowers. 

Solomon greets you and gently strokes your hair before kissing your head. He immediately asks if you want to consider moving to his dorm. 

———————————————

➣Obey Me Masterlist ➣ Buy me a Ko-fi or Commission?

[midnight-on-pluto]

Accidental Confession - Shoto Todoroki

Summary: during lunch, Shoto accidentally confessed to you

Genre: Fluff

masterlist

—“Want some?” Todoroki asked, offering me his Soba. My head tilted and I shook my head.

“No, thanks though.” I smiled.

“Are you sure? You always end up stealing some later on anyways,” he pointed out.

I giggled and pulled out my own lunch. “Thanks, but I’m good, really.”

He nodded and started eating while I pulled out the rice I’d packed for myself. It looked really good, sticky rice with some chopped up cucumbers and a few bits of crab mixed in.

We ate in silence per usual until Izuku and Uraraka walked over.

“Hey, Y/N!” Uraraka smiled at me. “Hey, Todoroki.”

He gave her a nod as he ate a noodle and I gave her a quick smile before going back to my food. Uraraka had just gotten something from the cafeteria and Izuku seemed to just not be eating.

“What’s up?” I asked him, curious as to why he didn’t get food.

“Oh, I ate with All Might earlier so I’m not super hungry.” He admitted, rubbing the back of his head.

I nodded softly and finished off my food. I packed up the container and looked over to Todoroki, who was doing the same.

“Wanna walk to the dorms to drop off this stuff before class?” I asked him. He nodded and stood up, outstretching his hand for me to use.

“Thanks,” I mumbled as he pulled me out of my seat. “See you guys later,” I waved to the other two and walked off with Todoroki.

Walking with him was mostly silent, but I didn’t mind. He never made it awkward when we walked and I appreciated that from him.

“Y/N,” Todoroki stopped. I looked back to him expectantly. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” I nodded and walked closer to him.

“Why do I feel differently towards you than Midoriya?” His question was sincere and it took me back a little bit. Was he insinuating that he likes me less than Midoriya?

“Huh?” I tilted my head again and his eyes widened slightly. “What do you mean, Todo?”

“Like that,” he pointed to my tilted head. “The things you do make me feel weird. Like this fluttering.”

I blushed, did he not realize what that was? I could see his face was confused, almost concerned for his own health.

“Todoroki, I don’t think you meant to tell me that,” I told him.

“No, I did.”

I studied him, the way his eyes focused on me when I was talking and no one else. How he listened to whatever I was saying with such content.

“Butterflies in your stomach,” I mumbled. “They’re butterflies in your stomach.”

“But I never swallowed butterflies, what are you saying?”

“Todo, the fluttering happens when you like someone.”

His eyes widened further when he realized. Immediately his cheeks turned red and he nodded.

“Are you okay?” I asked, concerned. I never saw any emotion on his face so seeing him heat up like that was quite scary.

“Y/N,” he spoke softly now. “I think I like you.”

I was stiff as a board now. Sure, I’d thought about him in that way, possibly crushed on him but I never thought he’d reciprocate the feels.

“I-I...” I didn’t know what to say. “Todo...roki.”

“Sorry was that awkward? Are you uncomfortable?” He was moving closer to me now.

“No!” I yelled, startling him and a few other students around us. “No, sorry I’m not uncomfortable.”

“Then why does your face look like that?”

“I-I’m....” His hand grabbed onto my wrist slightly, reassuring me. “I like you too.”

His eyes lit up and a small smile that was rarely seen grew on his face. “Good,” was all he said before slipping his hand in mine and walking again.

“We better hurry to the dorms, class starts soon.” He was tugging me along now, almost in a light jog. “Oh, by the way, I left some Soba for you later, I’ll leave it in the fridge for you.”

“T-Thanks, Todo.” I muttered through my smile.

[dennymilkus]

pt.2: things the team does for/with a fem teammate

wow! y'all really loved these so I felt inspired before my major test today so here is some more😌eat up. most of these ended up being about sleepovers, pictures, and mortifying period moments but some are just random!

see pt.1 here! and pt 3

contains: Karasuno team

After getting to know the team a little better, you feel super comfortable talking and you really feel like you're all one big dysfunctional family!

When the team has team sleepovers, Daichi has to have a talk with the boys that if any one of them makes you uncomfortable they will feel his w r a t h.

When they set up sleeping matts in the gym, they let you either sleep next to the managers or closer to the boys, depending on how comfortable you are with that.

So when it's time to sleep Tanaka and Noya bounce right up to you, smiling so wide, it almost hurts you to see their faces fall (because Hinata has already asked you to sleep next to him)

Whenever you want to take pictures Suga is ON IT with the angles and lighting.

Want to take a cute selfie for a crush you have? He forces the 2nd years to turn on their flashlights for good lighting.

Want to take some bomb ass photos with the other managers? He is posing and positioning you and crouching and stretching (see: bending over backwards) to get that perfect picture.

And when you want to take a selfie with the team? Asahi offers to use his long arms to hold the phone far enough away to get in everyone.

When you go to take a selfie with the first years, and can't get you arm to fit everyone in, Tsukishima rolls his eyes and takes the phone, but raises it a little too high and ends up getting a that middle aged mom angle. does it on purpose sometimes too.

Kageyama does NOT know how to smile so the most you can get out of him for a picture is just 😬. He's trying you guys.

(just a warning, period stuff for the next like, 3 bullet points))

I can imagine this very specifically but one time you were on your period, and during break at practice you went to grab a tampon out of your bag, and it fell out. No biggie, except Noya was behind you and had the entire Playtex Sport™ commercial memorized and started saying it behind you! You were mortified! Literally refused to turn around and just ran to the bathroom 🏃💨

But Kiyoko, Yachi, and you have mastered a sneaky handing off system where you roll your sleeves up and slip the pad/tampon through the other persons sleeve.

Kageyama saw one time and figured it out so he just deadass asked you what you were doing. You had to explain to him what a period was. He apologized after that.

After saturday practices at lunch or when buying snacks, Daichi always offers to pay for you; you of course tell him no (or maybe you don't and let him buy the onigiri for you), but you always appreciate the offer and tell him that.

If you ask one of the 2nd years to grab something from your (wallet, pencil case, phone) they first ask what pocket it is and oh so gently stick their hand in as to not grab something by accident that you didn't want them to

Tanaka offers you a piggyback ride almost every single day. When you say yes, he is ECSTATIC and ends up sweeping you up bridal style to show you how strong he is.

Noya tried it (because he wanted to prove that he was big and strong) and Suga ON VIDEO got Noya trying to pick you up and buckling under you, sending both of you to the floor. Tsukishima has never and will never shut up about it. Hinata tried it one time too! didn't go so well either.

When Tsukishima starts to tease Noya and Hinata about it, you challenge his skinny ass to pick you up thinking he'll realize his noodle arms aren't any better. To prove his point, he bends over for you to hop on his back, rolling his eyes of course saying "of course it's easy for me, i'm-" "CATCH ME" when you jump on him he's taken aback and almost falls forward! catches you tho and rubs it in the shorties' faces.

You milk this opportunity of course😈(idk abt y'all but the first time I got a piggyback from a tall person i was starstruck that they could see over other people's heads) and order him to go walk around with you so you could assert dominance and because you were generally amazed this is how he saw the world. cue the "damn bitch you live like this?" and him saying "yes im not an oompa loompa" cue smack on his little blonde head

Anyway, this started a teamwide tradition of the shortie squad™ and others to jump at people on the team and scream "CATCH ME", expecting them to catch you.

The game is so fun and all is well until Noya screams "CATCH ME" and Tanaka, who knocks into Ukai who's drinking a scalding cup of coffee. The game was fun while it lasted.c

[snackhobi]

prompt: “Is that my shirt you’re wearing?”

thank you to my darling @yeojaa​ for sending this in and thank you to my darling @hobi-gif​ for beta reading it for me, you are both such lovely stars in the night sky of my life xoxo

pairing: seokjin x reader / word count: 1.9k / genre: fluff (sfw/general) / warnings: none!

--

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single woman in possession of a hot roommate, must want to jump his bones.

Like. C’mon. Kim Seokjin is nothing if not easy on the eyes. It’s not enough that he has the body proportions of a god—broad shoulders, lovely thighs, everything in its place and perfectly in line with his height and his poise—he has a beautiful face, too. Those lips. That jaw. Those eyes. You don’t want to wax lyrical but it really is like God decided to take his time making Kim Seokjin and everyone else (like you) was just left with the dregs; the stuff that wasn’t good enough for Jin and was thrown aside.

The worst thing, though. The worst thing. The absolute worst thing about Kim Seokjin is that he is A Nice Person. 

You’d barely known each other, only a month into your cohabitation when he’d come across you crying into a tub of ice cream in the kitchen, sobbing over the guy who’d finally grown bored of stringing you along with promises of eventually becoming your actual boyfriend and had just cut you off altogether after one final lay. You were utterly heartbroken and entirely mortified when you noticed Jin standing in the kitchen doorway as you clumsily tried to dig your spoon into the still-hard vanilla, but he’d just slid down onto the floor next to you with a spoon in one hand as the other came to rest on your shoulder. He’d listened to you snivel and sniffle, quietly eating the weirdly chemical-flavoured chocolate ice cream in the own-brand Neapolitan tub you favoured—your least favourite and the one you always left till last.

Once a guy’s seen you crying your eyes out on the kitchen floor in old pyjamas, and you’ve seen him eat five pots of super hot instant noodles on the trot and chase the whole thing down with an entire box of doughnuts, you sort of get to know each other as people—both things are revealing in different ways—and it’s hard for that to not lead to friendship.

You could have dealt with Jin if he was just hot. But he’s hot and nice and funny, utterly ridiculous; he doesn’t take himself seriously while also knowing how to rein himself in when necessary to not overwhelm people and basically you’ve been crushing on him in a major, major way for a while now.

And like. Seokjin is single, so technically you have a chance. But you also have absolutely no chance at all, because? Hello? Kim Seokjin? You? You? Kim Seokjin? He’s so far out of your league he may as well be in another galaxy. And he’s also probably the best roommate you’ve ever had (cleans up after himself, doesn’t microwave fish and stink up the place, likes the same TV shows as you so there are no arguments over the remote), so you’re not about to throw a wrench into the mix by doing something stupid like confessing that you like him.

“Right, I should be back around ten,” says Seokjin. He’s all dressed up for a noraebang night with his friends—well, not dressed up really, they’re just gonna get drunk while wailing songs at the top of their lungs in a small room so it’s not like he has to go all out, but Seokjin makes everything look good. “Are you sure you don’t want to come?”

Seokjin is nice and hot and funny and friendly. Honestly, he’s just a dreamboat of a roommate and a man, with great friends too. Normally you would have leaped at the chance to spend a night out with Seokjin and the other guys, but you’d spilled your drink on Yoongi last time and were still convinced that he was plotting your imminent demise. Even if Seokjin insists otherwise, you want to give Yoongi a wide berth for a little while longer in the hopes he’ll suddenly suffer a bout of amnesia and forget that you spilled a very boozy and sticky Oreo and Baileys cocktail(/glorified milkshake) on him and ruined his shoes.

“I’m good,” you say. “But make sure you don’t have any fun without me and you have to let everyone know that it’s because I’m not there.”

Jin laughs, a wet squeegee of a sound, and it goes straight to your heart. “I’ll pass on the message,” he promises, blowing you a tiny kiss as he goes. 

(Ugh, he’s so cute. You hate him.) (No, you don’t.)

You seem to be setting a trend for yourself in the drink-spilling department, though. During an ad break you decide to get yourself a drink, and even though it’s just a Boys Over Flowers rerun that you’ve seen multiple times, you rush as you pour yourself a glass of orange juice—you don’t want to take too long and miss anything. Suffice to say you Fuck Up and end up with a shirt and trousers covered in juice and pulp and you miss a bunch of the episode as you clean it up, huffing dramatically to yourself the whole time, before scarpering towards your bedroom for some new clothes. 

At least, that’s the plan. You pass by Seokjin’s open door and pause, taking in the sight of a few discarded bits of clothing on his bed and across the back of his chair, things he’d clearly decided weren’t worth wearing out tonight. The one that’s caught your eye is the vibrant pink shirt strewn over his duvet, one of your favourites, one you haven’t seen him wear in a while. It’s one of your favourites because he just looks so cosy in it—Jin ends up with a lot of oversized clothes so they can fit over his shoulders, but he practically swims in material when he wears this shirt, flapping the sleeves at you and then laughing at his own antics. He could wear it as a dress if he wanted to, probably.

… so could you, if you wanted to, probably.

… but you shouldn’t. Like, that’s weird. Jin is your roommate and even if he’s made it clear that he has an open door policy, going in through said open door to get a bit of his clothing is weird. Definitely creepy.

But… you’ve already kicked off your dirtied outfit and you’re just in your underwear so you can’t be blamed for being worried if you’re going to get cold, right? You’re just grabbing the closest bit of clothing, aren’t you?

… You’ll take it off before he gets back and put it in the laundry with everything else; he won’t notice. You’ll just take this awful awful secret to the grave and never tell anyone about your invasive actions.

Oh, man, the shirt smells so good. You share the same laundry detergent but Jin had clearly tried this on before discarding it, the scent of his cologne lingering in the air as you end up swamped in the shirt (/shirt dress), and you don’t regret this. Well, you do, but also you don’t. It’s like being wrapped up in Jin’s arms. Jin’s not shy about giving you hugs but there’s something altogether different about wearing someone’s clothes.

You end up curled up on the sofa as you watch more Boys Over Flowers, knees to your chest and revelling in how cosy and small Jin’s massive shirt makes you feel. You have to hitch the material up so that your hands peep out the ends of the sleeves. Sweater paws are cute on everyone, even yourself, and you giggle as you fumble for the remote so that you can check how many more episodes there are before it turns to something else. You can indulge yourself for a bit. As a treat.

“Unbelievable, I can’t believe Minji did that,” you mutter, so caught up in the drama of it all (as if you haven’t seen this episode four times) that you don’t hear the key turning in the lock, nor do you hear the footsteps that are heading towards you—what you do hear, however, is the sudden sound of Seokjin’s voice, freezing like a rabbit caught in headlights when you do.

“I forgot my wallet,” he says. “I—”

And that’s how he catches you, wide-eyed as you stare back at him, wishing that you could bury yourself between the sofa pillows so that he can’t see you. His keys are still in his hand and his mouth is open around an unfinished word as he takes the sight of you in, scrunched up against the armrest in some ridiculous attempt to shrink yourself small enough that he would have missed you.

He stares. You stare. You both stare. And then—

“Is that my shirt you’re wearing?”

“No!” A high-pitched shrill of an obvious lie. “No, uh, nope. Nuh-uh. Haha, oh, Jin, always such a jokester, you.”

You want the sofa to suddenly develop sentience and swallow you whole, just so you can be out of this situation. So you wouldn’t have to watch as a smile starts to spread over Jin’s face, the way there’s a little glint in his eyes, the way he opens his mouth and says—

“You know, you didn’t have to turn down noraebang just so you could wear my clothes. You just had to ask, I would have said yes.” He doesn’t seem creeped out, just amused, which is—well, it’s better, but, what? He’s laughing at you? You don’t know if that’s worse, somehow, actually.

“I didn’t! I spilled orange juice on my shirt and then I saw this shirt and you weren’t home—”

“Aha, so you admit it, it’s not your shirt,” Jin proclaims. He looks smug.

“Oh my God, I am full of regret,” you groan. “My life is a disaster. Can we pretend this never happened? I will pay you literal money. Please.”

At this, Jin’s eyes turn soft. “Do you really want that?”

“I—wuh? Do I really want us both to pretend you didn’t walk in on me wearing your shirt like some weird stalker or something? Absolutely. Yes. Let’s do that.”

“I wasn’t joking about letting you wear my clothes,” he says. There’s a note to his voice, something a little doughy, yielding and warm for you, and—you know what your gut is screaming at you, but— “I always thought you’d look cute in them, and I was right.”

You splutter. Jin thought you’d look cute—he’s been thinking about you wearing his clothes—the sort of thing that, you know, couples do. But this is Kim Seokjin you’re talking about. There’s no way he’s attracted to you in the way you’re attracted to him.

… but he is looking at you in a way that’s soft and tender, the same look you give him when you think he isn’t looking.

“Jin,” you say, slow. “Are you…”

“The most handsome man alive? Yes, I am.”

You make a face at his interruption and he laughs at your expression before going quiet, eyes so big and lovely and warm as he smiles at you, and you continue to speak. “Are you saying you want to, y’know. See me wearing more of your clothes? Or, uh... Less clothes in general?”

You can feel the blood rising in your cheeks as you say this, and you can see the red that starts to tinge the top of Jin’s ears, exquisite and wonderful. “I’m saying that I’m happy to give you what’s mine, including my clothes,” he says. “And my time. And love.”

You end up pulling the excess material of the shirt over your head as you turn into some sort of bright pink turtle, overwhelmed and in disbelief but so happy.

Judging from Jin’s laughter and the warmth of his hands reaching for yours in their too-long sleeves, he is, too.

[illegal-spiegel]

Can We Kiss Now?

Pairing: Hitoshi Shinso x gn!reader Genre: fluff Warnings: none Summary: there’s a big misunderstanding between you and your best friend on Valentine’s Day but you eventually sort it out  Word Count: 2.8k words Prompt #24: “Okay, we all get it. You’re in love with me. Can we kiss now?”

1k Followers Event

The fateful day finally happened. 

Shinso was let into the hero course and not only that, he was put into class 1A. You swear you had never seen him smile more in your life. Well, that is until the day you two finally started dating after dancing around each other for months. The way it happened still makes you laugh and tease Shinso relentlessly, it never seeming to get old for you. 

His first day in class 1A was chaotic, to say the least. Everyone was super friendly towards him, to his surprise. Especially Iida. The guy was so nice when he was introducing everyone, offering him to sit with him at lunch, and making sure that Shinso never fell behind with his studies. It made you want to be a better person too. 

“Hi, I’m (Y/n). It’s nice to meet the infamous Shinso,” you say playfully while offering him your hand to shake. He looks up from something he’s writing to look at you, his, almost bored, eyes seeming to light up a fraction more. 

He shakes your hand, a lazy smile gracing his handsome features. “Nice to meet the infamous (Y/n). I’ve heard quite a bit about you, you know,” he informs. You smile brighter than before, letting his hand go to lean against the desk next to his. 

“I hope all good things,” you reply, making him chuckle and set down his pencil. 

“Mostly,” he teases. You hum and look around at your classmates, finding most of them up and talking to others while waiting for your teacher to show up. 

“Well, if you heard anything from Kaminari, ignore him. Everything that came from him is a lie,” you joke, knowing Kaminari would never talk badly about anyone. Shinso huffs a laugh before a smirk suddenly crawls onto his face. 

“What if he said you’re cute?” he argues, raising a brow up at you. Your eyes widen at this, a blush instantly starting to spread across your face. 

“Why that little—” you start before stopping from Shinso laughing. 

“I’m just pulling your leg,” he reassures, making you puff out your cheeks before letting all of the air in your lungs go. 

“You jerk,” you insult jokingly, tapping your foot against his leg. He hums and smiles at you, his eyes giving you a once over before turning to look back at his paperwork. 

“Say, do you think you could help me with this? We hadn’t learned this yet in my class,” he asks softly, making you perk up and push off the desk. 

“Oh, sure. I can try,” you sweetly reply as you come to stand by his desk now, looking over what he was working on. From there you helped him to the best of your ability, smiles and laughs being shared between you two every once in a while. 

And that’s how your friendship first formed. You two ended up getting closer and closer, soon becoming best friends and being practically inseparable. It stayed that way for a while. That is until February came around. 

Going to school on Valentine’s day kind of annoyed you. You were surrounded by chocolates, flowers, stuffed animals, cards, you name it. All the couples, new and old ones alike, are always all over each other and this year, it just reminds you that your crush doesn’t like you. 

Yeah, it didn’t take you long to fall for the sarcastic male with a terrible sleeping schedule. The girls and some of the guys in your class always tried to reassure you that he likes you back but you just never saw it. Despite knowing what you think about it, they tease you both relentlessly. You don’t really mind it but Shinso seems to get annoyed by it? Or maybe irritated? You aren’t sure. He always has this far away look on his face whenever it happens. 

You walk into the room to see goody bags on everyone’s desk, a smile coming to your face. You checked the sticker on it to see that it was from most of the girls in the class. They each added their own personal touch to the bag. You noticed that you got more candy than the others though, making your smile grow wider. You thank them and pop a sweet into your mouth after taking your seat, starting to look around the room. 

Kaminari seems to be nervous, despite his bragging that he was going to nail a date today. You follow his jittery gaze to Jiro, a smirk coming to your face. Saw that one coming. You hope he asks her out, knowing that she likes him back. 

From there, you continue to look around the room, seeing some looking tired and annoyed while others are blushing and holding gifts. It’s nice to see that some people are enjoying the holiday. 

Just as class is about to start, Shinso comes in and takes his seat. You wanted to say hi to him before class started but you didn’t have time to do it now. Oh well, you’ll talk to him at lunch. 

When the bell rang signaling lunch, you got out of your chair and stretched your limbs. You then turned towards Shinso’s desk, only to find him gone. You look around the room, wondering if he went to go ask Iida a question about the homework, only to find him nowhere in the room. Your brows furrow as a pout comes onto your face, a small sigh escaping you as you head out of the classroom to head to the cafeteria. After finding a seat and starting to eat, you find that Shinso isn’t in your usual spot, and after further examination, he wasn’t even in the cafeteria. 

Where did he go? Is he having lunch on the roof? Was he not feeling well so he went back to the dorms? Or maybe he’s in the nurse’s office? Question after question swirled through your mind but with no answers, you felt a little bummed. You perked up though when the three musketeers sat down with you. 

“Hey, (Y/n)! Where’s Shinso?” Deku asks as he sits next to Uraraka. You look between the two, hoping that Deku will ask her out soon. Uraraka had been telling you yesterday that she hopes he gives her a flower or something. You’ll have to ask her how that went. 

“I don’t know,” you answer honestly. 

Uraraka raises her brow at you when you say that, her big eyes showing you just how confused she is. “Wait, really? But you two are practically always together. You both have like a sixth sense to always know where the other is,” she says half playfully, starting to dig into her noodles once she finishes speaking. 

You smile a bit at her teasing but shrug your shoulders, still trying to think of where he could’ve run off to. “Yeah, I’m not sure where he went. The bell rang and when I turned to his desk, he was gone,” you explain. You look down at your own food, missing the look the three shoot each other. 

“I’m sure he just went to the library or something,” Iida reassures, sending you that kind smile of his. You can’t help but return it, slowly nodding your head with a sigh to let out your nerves. 

“I know. You’re right.” You let it go for now, deciding to just enjoy your lunch with your friends. When you four make it back to class, Shinso is sitting at his desk eating his lunch. You frown as you break away from the three to go over to your best friend. 

“Hey. Why are you eating your lunch in here?” you ask worriedly. Is he mad at you? Did you do something? He looks up from his lunch for a split second before focusing back down on it again. 

“I forgot my lunch at the dorms, so I just went back to go get it,” he explains. The frown still hangs heavy on your face, your arms crossing over your chest. 

“Why didn’t you join us in the cafeteria after getting it then?” you pry further. This time, he doesn’t look at you, merely chewing on his lunch instead of answering you. Just as he swallows, the bell rings. You huff out a puff of air before leaving his desk to go to yours. The rest of the day seems to drag on, boredom covering every crevice of your mind. 

That and Shinso. 

You just couldn’t figure out why he was acting so weirdly. That’s when it hit you. 

Is he going to ask someone out? Is he acting weird because he’s nervous? Or maybe that’s where he ran off to at lunch, to ask them out. But he seems so down. Did he get turned down? Or maybe they agreed and they said that they didn’t want him hanging around you anymore.

Your gut twists at the thought, your hands starting to shake a bit from how much you’re worrying. Is he going to stop being your friend? You can handle not being his but you at least want to be friends with him. You almost feel sick to your stomach, your entire body slouching in your chair as you stare blankly down at your desk. 

When school finally came to an end, everyone rushed out of the school with excitement. As you walked down the hallway, you heard chatter of who asked who out and where so and so is going to go for their date. You just stare at your shoes, your back starting to hurt from all the slouching you’re doing. 

“Hey, why didn’t you wait for me?” you hear a familiar voice say from behind and then beside you. You pick your head up to see Shinso, his brows furrowed together a bit as he hefts his bag further up his shoulder. 

“Why didn’t you have lunch with me?” you fire right back, your eyes staring into his. He’s shocked by your surprise, his mouth dropping open for a moment. 

“What? (Y/n)—”

“Look. I get it. I just wish you would’ve told me.” You just reach the dorms, letting him come to a stop. It takes you a moment to realize that he’s not beside you and following you inside the dorms. You stop now as well to turn back and face him, raising your brow at him. 

“You know what’s going on?” he asks, disappointment filling his tone and features. You scoff at this, crossing your arms over your chest. 

“Yeah, I do. Don’t look so disappointed,” you snap before spinning around to continue walking away. You hear his feet scurry to catch up to you, his eyes wide when you glance at him. 

“Sorry. I just wanted to be the one to tell you. Who told you?” he asks softly, a sigh escaping him. You ground your teeth together, getting angrier by the second. 

“No one did. It wasn’t hard to figure out. I just don’t know why you didn’t tell me,” you hiss. He stays quiet for a moment before letting out another sigh, a hand coming up to drag his hand through his hair. 

“I was going to today. I guess I should’ve told you sooner. I’m sorry,” he says weakly. You turn to look at him again, a sigh leaving you now.

“Look, it’s fine,” you reassure, sending him the best smile that you can manage at the moment. Your crush just confirmed your worst nightmare but he’s your best friend, so you’re determined to be here for him. You wonder who it is. He smiles right back at you though, some color seeming to fill his cheeks as he reaches out to take your hand. 

You stop at the door and pull your hand away, your brows knitted together as you stare at him. “What are you doing?” you ask, showing him just how muddled you are. He tenses up at this, realization seeming to dawn on him. 

“Oh, sorry. I just thought that since you knew how I felt that you…” he starts before trailing off, his face a dark color. You didn’t think that it was possible to be this lost. 

“Thought that I what? Wanted to hold your hand after you just told me that you like someone else?” you ask for clarification. When you say this though, his jaw drops as he stares at you with an unreadable expression. 

“What?” is all he says back to you, continuing to just stare on and leaving you bewildered. He’s starting to look just as you feel though. 

“What do you mean ‘what’?” you ask, wishing he would just spit out what he’s thinking. He suddenly sucks in a deep breath and can’t seem to make eye contact with you, his face darker than Kirishima’s hair. 

“(Y/n), I, um…” he says clearly before mumbling things, making you sigh. 

“What was that? You started mumbling and I couldn’t understand you.” 

“I really, uh…” he tries again before just doing the same thing as before. At this point, you’re starting to get a little annoyed. 

“Shinso, just say whatever it is you have to say,” you say as calmly as you can. He goes quiet, staring at your shoes instead of meeting your eyes. Instead of saying anything though, he tugs his backpack off and unzips it. He tugs out a stuffed animal and some candy, silently handing it to you with slightly shaky hands. 

You slowly take it, wondering why he’s giving you this stuff. He doesn’t say anything to you though, leaving you in the dark about what’s happening. It takes a few seconds but it finally hits you what he’s trying to do. 

He’s trying to confess. 

And he’s failing miserably, but you find it so cute that you can’t help but smile. A blush comes across your face but with his head down, he can’t see your smile or blush. Deciding to tease him further, you drop the smile and bring out your best acting skills. 

“What’s this? Do you want my opinion on whether to give it to the person you like or not?” you ask, it taking everything in you to not laugh or grin. You decide to head in now since the wind is picking up, leaving Shinso to wordlessly follow behind you. 

“What? No! It’s…” he trails off again, a smile coming to your face since your back is to him. You look at the people sitting in the common area, shooting them a wink before turning to face Shinso again. 

“It’s just what?” you ask, wanting him to think that you’re beyond confused. He sighs, starting to get angry. At himself, you’re assuming. 

“It’s...I just...I want…” He starts before trying again, deciding to change his sentence over and over again. You can tell he’s attempting to find the courage to say the words that you want to hear but you can also tell that he’s scared of rejection. 

You can see why though. All his life people have been scared of him and assumed that he was going to end up being a villain. All he’s ever been is rejected. That is until he came to class 1A and became friends with you and the others. You sigh and walk over to him, starting to feel bad for dragging this on for so long.

“Okay, we all get it. You’re in love with me. Can we kiss now?” you joke, shooting him a smile. He snaps his head up at you, his jaw hanging so far open that it’s practically touching the floor. 

“You knew?” he asks confusedly before gasping and pointing at you, “You knew!” He glares at you now, a pout coming onto his lips. You giggle and walk over to him, cautiously wrapping your arms around his neck with a warm smile. 

“It took me a while but I eventually figured it out. Now, where’s my kiss?” He huffs and tries to look mad at you but even he can’t deny the overwhelming joy he’s starting to feel. When his lips connect with yours, the people that are in the dorms start to cheer and wolf whistle, causing both of you to blush as you pull away. 

“Take me on a date,” you command, a big smile on your face. He snorts a bit as he raises a brow at you, pulling away to gently take ahold of your hand. 

“Aren’t you supposed to ask for me to take you on a date? Or better yet, why don’t you ask me on a date?” You scoff at his reply, starting to drag him right back the way you two came. 

“In your dreams, lover boy,” you tease before giving him another quick kiss.

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[lloydskywalkers]

heLLO i’m so sorry this took so long!! tumblr did not, in fact, eat your ask this time, i just took five years with the response T-T i did very much want to write something about Jay and Cliff (because that’s a criminally underused relationship), but unfortunately season 12 has come out since i wrote All I’m Asking For and kind of...made things...a lot angstier :’( so this leans much more on the angst side than the fluff, but!! there is some in there, i promise

It happens mid-battle, which is never a good time for anything to happen, really, other than a spontaneous victory. If it had happened at any other time, Jay would’ve gone with him. Any other time, he tells himself, he would’ve found the time to talk.

But it’s mid-battle right after Sensei Wu’s gone missing in time, and ironically enough, time is the last thing Jay has on his hands.

It’s not even the worst of battles — just some jerks who actually happen to have too much time and advanced high-grade weaponry on their hands — but it’s enough to send the city’s civilians screaming for cover as another chunk of building comes raining down toward them. Normally Cole would take this kind of thing, since Jay’s more about the agile, dynamic stuff (not because his arms are a whole lot like half-cooked spaghetti noodles next to Cole’s, not at all). But Cole’s on the other side of the city running collateral damage watch with Zane, so Jay’s the only one around to snatch the poor man out of harm’s way before a chunk of concrete squashes him.

“Whoo, that was close,” he breathes out, as dust mushrooms out from the impact nearby. Jay carefully sets the man down, coughing briefly and tugging his mask into place. “You alright?”

The man doesn’t reply, staring at Jay with wide, eerily familiar eyes. “You,” he breathes, as if Jay is some miraculous apparition — which, sure, Jay just saved his life, but like, he’s Jay. He’s a whole two or three inches shorter than this guy, he’s not super impressive.

“You’re the lightning ninja,” the man continues. “You’re — Jay?”

Caught between being pleased he’s recognized and being slightly creeped out, Jay opens his mouth to reply. Then he looks at the guy, actually looks at the guy, and immediately shuts it. And a good thing, too, because Jay’s mouth suddenly goes so dry it kinda feels like a dust vacuum.

“Y-you’re Cliff Gordon,” he manages, on a wheezing kind of whisper. “H-hi. Hi, hello, it’s—”

An honor? Jay’s half-hysterical mind throws at him. What is he supposed to say? Hello, long-lost father who gave me up as a baby, I figured that out, by the way? Does Cliff even know Jay’s his son? Does he even know his name’s Jay? Oh, why oh why has Jay put off acknowledging anything that happened with Nadakhan for this long, just because the entire thing’s a minefield worth of trauma and it makes him wildly nauseous to think about it at all, it doesn’t mean—

“Jay,” Cliff Gordon repeats, his eyes wide and shiny, and Jay’s stomach drops like he’s on a roller coaster. Because the way he says his name — it’s like he knows, it’s like he cares—

“You, uh,” Jay swallows, utterly oblivious to the exploding building two blocks back. “I think…you knew my mom?”

Alright, points for Jay for the lamest segue into this possible, but the beaming, almost-painful smile that splits Cliff’s face at least drowns part of the shame out.

“You could say that,” he murmurs, looking part-overjoyed, part-terrified. “If you know that, then — you must know I’m your — I never meant to lose—”

Cliff cuts off painfully, dragging a hand through his graying hair. Jay vaguely notes the puffs of dust that go drifting off from it, before the awkward silence gets too heavy and his mouth kicks back into action.

“Yeah, kinda…figured that out,” Jay laughs, nervously. “I don’t, um, I’m not mad…? If that’s what you’re worried about, but it’d be uh, nice to…”

“Of course,” Cliff nods fervently, as if he’s somehow psychic and can mind-read the ten thousand words’ worth of questions barraging across Jay’s brain. “Of course, we should talk, there’s so much I need to explain, I—”

Jay’s radio interrupts him in a bursting screech of static, leaving them both wincing.

“Jay, any day you wanna get back in the game, we could use a little help here!”

Kai’s voice is strained, and Jay glances from the battle to his — Cliff — with wild eyes. Cliff shakes his head, waving toward his teammates.

“Go on, go on,” he says, something like pride in his voice. “You’ve got a much more important job to do.” He pauses, his eyes bright and painfully hopeful. “But you’ll — you’ll come and visit me sometime, will you?”

“Yeah,” Jay nods, feeling oddly shaky. “Of course, I’d — I’d really like that.”

Cliff Gordon’s face splits into full smile, and Jay takes that as his cue to leave before he does something hideously embarrassing, like run his mouth or try to — to hug the guy. His eyes catch the bright flash of the Destiny’s Shadow, and he jumps up as Lloyd tilts the plane, Zane reaching a hand out to snag Jay and haul him in.

“Nice timing,” Jay gasps in thanks as he finds his seat, fumbling once with the tight squeeze. “Sorry about the wait.”

Zane simply squeezes his shoulder briefly. “I am merely glad to see you in one piece,” he says, wincing briefly as another explosion goes off. Jay cringes as his eyes rake over the smoking flames. Man, they’re gonna be stuck doing repairs here forever—

“Who was that?”

Jay startles back to himself at Lloyd’s voice, blinking rapidly. He opens his mouth, prepared to unleash a floodgate’s worth of “you’ll never believe this”—

Then stops dead as Zane and Lloyd stare curiously at him, awaiting answer. Jay shuts his mouth, and swallows.

How is he supposed to announce he’s met his father — his second, whole father, in addition to the super great one he already has — to them? To Zane, who barely got any time with his only parent before he died? To Lloyd, who's still actively grieving having lost his only dad for like, the third time? How’s that gonna go over, huh, motormouth?

So Jay shakes his head, forcing an easy laugh instead. “Just some random fan.”

************

He means to follow up right after. He does, really, but everything goes to hell in a handbasket so quickly Jay barely even has time to breath. First it’s the months of searching for Sensei, then it’s guarding the royal family, then they’re on the run, then they’re watching Garmadon brutalize their baby brother on live television and he’s dying on a table and the city’s being destroyed by a giant and the Bounty’s being crushed with them on it and they’re running for their lives in the First Realm and Sensei Wu’s a teenager and—

They’re kind of busy, that’s the point he’s trying to make.

Eventually, there’s a brief spot of time he could go, maybe. It’s right after they’ve returned from the First Realm, though, and that’s...not a great time.

The city’s still stumbling back to its feet, for one, and the loss of the emperor and empress doesn’t exactly help. Their little family’s left stumbling back to its feet even slower, as beaten down and utterly exhausted as they are. The four of them had their own run of it in the First Realm, but Lloyd and Nya didn’t have it any better back in Ninjago, and the whole thing’s just — just a big mess. And sure, maybe reuniting with his long-lost biological father now could like, actually benefit Jay’s half-shredded mental state, since the guy seemed pretty happy to see him, but…

But fathers.

Lloyd still wanders their apartment like a ghost at night, his eyes dull and haunted from whatever night terror he’s been graced with now. He wanders a little bit like that in the day, too, eyes glazing over and hands trembling at times. Jay knows why, of course — they all know, it’s not a secret. Not with the high-definition TV footage that keeps circulating. And they — they try to help, of course, they do their very best, but there are some things only time can fix.

Jay watches Lloyd’s eyes shutter at the mention of his father, and wonders if his entire life is enough to fix whatever’s been broken with his own.

In other words, Jay decides to be a coward.

Ironically enough, however, it ends up being Lloyd that encourages him to go. Not that he realizes that.

“Don’t bother making extra for dinner tonight, Zane,” Lloyd announces wearily, as he trudges through the kitchen. “My mom’s on the road again.”

Zane blinks at that, then frowns. “Where is she off to now?”

“Don’t know,” Lloyd says shortly, before promptly stalking off toward the rooftop exit. Jay and Zane stand there in silence for a moment, Zane still methodically stirring the rice. Then he turns to Jay, and fixes him with a look.

“Grumpy-about-parents Lloyd is normally Nya’s job, you know,” Jay huffs, but he relents, following Lloyd’s quiet footsteps to the roof. Lloyd’s curled up in his usual spot, close enough to the edge that it frightened the life out of Kai the first time they found him. Jay doesn’t exactly get why, because Lloyd’s sad, yeah, but he’s not—

Well, maybe Kai’s just scared Lloyd’ll trip and fall off the roof. That’s what Jay’s choosing to believe, for his own sake.

Either way, Lloyd looks pretty sad now, so Jay plops himself right down next to him with a huff, neatly startling Lloyd so badly he almost does trip right off the roof.

“Woah, hey, it’s just me,” Jay says quickly, throwing his hands up. Lloyd glares at him, and Jay makes a face. “Don’t give me that, you’re the one that’s supposed to have ninja reflexes.”

“Hmph,” Lloyd grumbles, wrapping his arms back around his knees, but he looks slightly less likely to zap Jay’s nervous system full of energy, so he takes that as a go-ahead.

“So, your mom, huh,” Jay starts, with all the intent of comforting Lloyd and comforting Lloyd alone. “Hey, random question, but how did, um, why’d you decide to let her back into your life, in the first place?”

“What?” Lloyd stares at him. Jay cringes. Oops, that wasn’t supposed to come out. Classic Walker, he’s brought his own issues right into the middle of it, like an absolute selfish—

Great, now he wants to throw himself off the roof.

“Sorry, sorry, forget I said that,” Jay babbles, desperately trying to re-route the conversation. “Just — forget I opened my mouth, okay? Please?”

Lloyd shakes his head, looking more concerned than sad now. He’s even unfolded from his tight little Lloyd-angst-ball, which Jay would count as a victory if it weren’t for all the wrong reasons. “Jay, is everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, of course!” Jay blusters. Lloyd stares at him. Jay gives him a bright smile back. Lloyd continues to stare.

“Okay, fine, not really, but — that’s not why I came up here,” Jay admits, cheeks flushing.

Lloyd’s eyebrows furrow in concern. “Is everything…okay with your parents?” His voice is tentative, as if he’s almost scared of Jay’s response, and Jay can’t have that.

“My parents are fine,” he replies, firmly. “But, uh, thanks for asking. I’m just…” Jay trails off, abruptly realizing that explaining this is going to require mentioning Cliff Gordon, which is going to require mentioning that he’s adopted, which is going to require explaining why he hasn’t told the rest of his team this. None of which are options Jay wants to explore at the moment, so he desperately tries to backtrack.

Lloyd, faithfully caring brother that he is to the bitter end, beats him to it. “Well, even if they are fine, um. To answer your question, I guess I…I needed to know.” He blows his breath out, glancing out over the skyline, half-broken buildings forming dark silhouettes against the setting sun. “I needed to know why she - she left me. If it was me, or if it was her, or…whatever, you know?” Lloyd bites his lip, and Jay suddenly feels like a horrible person for putting him through the mother thing right after the father thing’s been blown to smithereens.

And yet.

“Yeah, I get that,” Jay says quietly, letting it sink in. And he does, really. More than he thought he would, and this is probably a big glaring sign from the heavens, huh.

“But I don’t know,” Lloyd continues, sounding small as his hands tug on a frayed thread from a torn spot in his gi. “Maybe sometimes it’s better to cut people out entirely, too.”

He looks terribly worn when he says that, too young and too old for his age all at once, and Jay decides he hates the expression on his youngest brother.

“I’ll remember that, next time you steal the last of my coffee stash,” he says.

Lloyd gives a startled huff of laughter, before jabbing him in the side with his elbow. “That’s not what I meant,” he rolls his eyes, but there’s a smile edging his mouth now — not quite the Lloyd smile he’s used to, but it’s not as frail as it’s been, either. Lloyd doesn’t look so much like porcelain that’s been stepped on anymore, and the proud spark of joy Jay feels from that is enough to convince him that it’s a good idea.

He did promise Cliff Gordon he would, after all, and besides — knowing can’t be that bad, and Jay’s a firm believer in the wisdom of knowledge, and all that.

He’s also a firm believer of closure, but he’s stopped claiming to be one, since it probably comes off pretty hypocritical lately.

************

Jay doesn’t tell anyone where he’s going. He doesn’t even tell them he’s going at all, he just…waits for a convenient opportunity to slip out when no one will notice.

He wishes he had. He wishes he’d told Cole, told Nya or - or anyone he was going, and at the same time he’s glad he told no one at all. He’s not quite sure he could bear anyone else seeing whatever look’s on his face right now, on top of everything else.

“Oh, sweetheart, I’m so sorry,” the woman at the estate tells him, her eyes teary. “Cliff Gordon passed away a month ago.”

That…doesn't make sense, at first. It takes a minute, to sink through the odd roaring noise in Jay’s ears, and finally reach his brain.

“Passed…away,” he repeats, blankly.

The lady nods, looking at him with so much pity Jay kind of wants to kick her shins. “It was his heart, poor man. He hasn’t been so well the last few years, you know.”

“Right.” Jay feels a little like he does when he’d used to jump off his dragon, except this time he’s been tossed from it and he’s free-falling to a short and sudden stop.

“Did you know him?” she asks, curiously.

Jay tries to make some form of response, like “I was his son”, except all that comes out is a whole bunch of nothing. Nothing, just like what’s left in Jay’s head. He blinks rapidly, trying to banish the image seared into his brain.

Cliff Gordon’s eyes, bright and painfully hopeful.

You’ll come visit me sometime, will you?

Jay swallows thickly. “Sorry, if you’ll, uh — excuse me, I think lunch was bad.” Then he ducks for the nearby bushes, and proceeds to be horribly sick.

He tells himself, through heaving gasps, that the hot tears are only reflexive.

************

And that’s that. Jay, stupid, selfish Jay, waited too long and now he’s lost his chance forever. Because he was — what, scared? Nervous?

He’s not scared now. He kind of just hates himself, which isn’t the newest thing in the world, but this time it burns like the worst of scrapes and crawls up on him in the middle of the night, screaming what-if’s into his brain until Jay’s biting down on his pillow before he starts screaming himself.

It hurts, but he’s got no one to blame but himself. Jay messed this up all his own and he sure as heck doesn’t deserve any sympathy from his team for it. So he’s not going to even give them the chance, because they’ll never know. Jay will take this secret to the grave, because imagining the looks on everyone else’s face when he tells them he ruined this makes him want to put himself in the grave.

How long did he wait for Jay, how long did he—

Jay’s just going to drive himself insane with his own stupid brain and that’s that.

Well, that’s supposed to be that. It would’ve been that, except Cole is perceptive and Cole knows him too well, and Cole spots the look on his face when he’s telling him everything he’s found out about his mother, since Jay can’t even hide that from him.

And maybe Jay’s just weak, or so desperate for some form of reassurance or - or attention that he cracks, and spills the whole sorry thing to Cole. To his undying credit, Cole doesn’t even look like he despises Jay once. Instead, he looks at him with all this sympathy and kindness and oh, if Jay was a crier—

Well, actually, Jay is a crier, and ends up bawling into Cole’s gi at two in the morning, but what else is new.

The important thing is that Cole is Jay’s very best friend and possibly favorite person in the whole entire world, and Jay is going to murder him in cold blood for dragging him to Cliff Gordon’s estate and forcing their way in.

“If he cared enough to want to meet you, he’ll have cared enough to leave you in his will,” Cole reminds him, staunchly. “He knows how busy your life was, so I’ll bet you anything he understood.”

“Stop trying to make me feel better,” Jay hisses, as Cole manhandles him down the mansion’s — the mansion’s! — hallways. “I don’t deserve it.”

“For the love of—” Cole cuts off with an exasperated huff. “It is not your fault this happened. This is not on you. How many times are we going to have to do this, Jay.”

“Until the time you let me wallow in miserable peace,” Jay mutters. What does Cole know, it’s not like he totally bailed on his parent and then let them die. Not that Jay could do anything about that last part, sure, but the rest of it.

Cole stops them in one of the massive living rooms, finally fixing Jay with one of those stares. Uh oh.

“At least read the letter,” Cole says, suddenly pleading. “You don’t have to look at anything else if you don’t want to, but please read the letter. For me?”

Oh, Jay hates him. He tells him so, even as his glare falters in the face of Cole’s stupid puppy eyes.

“Is that a yes?” Cole replies hopefully, offering the letter they were handed with the estate key. Jay gives him a last, withering glare before snatching the letter from him.

“You’re the worst,” he mutters, as he tears open the envelope with shaky fingers. He hesitates for a beat, before mustering whatever pathetic courage he has and tugging the paper out, unfolding it as his eyes find the carefully scrawled words.

My dear Jay—

He promptly bursts into tears.

“Jay wha — Jay what’s wrong, is it that bad?” Cole is frantic as he hovers over him, his hands half-caught between reaching for Jay and reaching for the letter in his hands. Jay shakes his head, trying to stifle the sudden waterfall’s worth of tears that decided to make an appearance, and clutches the paper tighter.

Cole makes an anxious sound. “Jay, you know he’s — if he’s said something bad, it’s — he doesn’t know anything, right?”

Oh no, now Jay wants to cry harder. Cole sounds desperately concerned, kind and caring and genuine like Cole always is, and Jay feels like the worst person in the world.

Stupid, Jay, he scolds himself hotly, swiping angrily at his eyes. Stupid, selfish Jay. He’s got nothing to be crying about. Zane only had one dad, and he doesn’t go around whining about it. Lloyd’s got one dad who’s died three times, and may as well be dead now ‘cause he’s such a jerk. Kai and Nya didn’t even have any parents until last year. And Cole lost his mom who he loved, he loved so much, and he’s still here supporting Jay — stupid, selfish Jay, who’s got two entire stable parents who he’s never once doubted love him, and yet here he is, crying over the one he never really knew.

“Jay,” Cole tries again, quieter this time. “Jay, you’re allowed to be sad about your dad. It’s not a contest.”

Stupid, perceptive Cole.

“He said he loves me,” Jay finally croaks, swiping at the tears all over his face. “He didn’t even know me, Cole, how was he supposed to know that?”

Cole’s eyes soften, all melty and gross. “You’re his son, Jay, he knew you.” His lips quirk up in a smile. “Besides, he talked to you once, right? You make some pretty impactful first impressions, motormouth.”

Jay can’t decide whether to be insulted or more flattered than he’s been in the last six months. He decides to punch Cole weakly in the shoulder, before crying harder. Cole doesn’t even flinch at the hit, built like a rock as he is, and simply snatches Jay’s arm and tugs him close, wrapping his arms around him tightly. And oh, Jay wants to pull away, he doesn’t want to break down in his dead father’s mansion like this, Jay doesn’t have a lot of dignity but he’s at least got his shreds, but—

Cole gives the best stupid hugs in the world, and what’s Jay gonna do, deny such instant love and comfort? The risk of hurting Cole’s feelings far outweighs Jay’s tattered dignity, he tells himself. That’s why he clings to Cole like an overgrown barnacle and wails into his shoulder like a broken faucet. That’s the only reason, obviously.

“It’s okay to cry, you big moron,” Cole says after he’s calmed down, briefly squeezing tighter. “I get it. But you really should read more than the first lines of that thing. I think…I think it’ll help.”

“This is all I’ve got, though,” Jay sniffles. “I don’t — I lost any other connection I’ve got to him.”

“Sometimes you just gotta work with what you have,” Cole says gently, a little bitter, a little sweet. “And somehow, you have to make it enough.”

Jay pauses at that, thinking back to the statue miles and miles beneath a mountain, the delicate locket Cole had turned over in his fingers. He looks back to the letter in his hands, the lines and lines of all the words his father left for him, and remembers Lloyd’s words about knowing.

His fingers tighten on the edges of his letter. Jay, he decides, is done being scared. He’s got Cole at his side — what’s he got to be afraid of, anyways?

���Okay,” he says, swiping once more at his eyes, and giving Cole a watery smile. “Okay. Help me read through the whole thing?”

“I wore my old sweatshirt for a reason,” Cole replies, making a show of wringing his sleeve out. Jay whacks him with the envelope, but the laugh he shudders out feels real, this time. He gently spreads the letter out atop his lap, focusing on the words again.

It’ll be enough. It’ll sting, but…it’ll be enough.

Like Lloyd’s tattered photograph, like Cole’s mother’s last words — it has to be.

[toomanyfandoms02]

The Photographer // Matthew Gray Gubler x Reader

So I made a one-shot based off of the picture down here!

Word count ~ 3.1k

Summary - y/n is a celebrity photographer, and Matthew's birthday is coming up. This calls for a birthday shoot.

Ever since I was in sixth grade, I dreamed of being a photographer. But back then, I was just taking candid pictures of my cat (Peanut Butter), and random flowers that my mom had graciously planted for me. I really never planned on taking nice, professional pictures of people.

But here I was.

I went to 'California College of Arts' in San Francisco for 4 years. After that, I had a bit of trouble getting myself out there. I had a decent following on my instagram. People liked the pictures of my dog, and the pictures of nature that I took on my many travels. But likes and follows don't get you money, at least not enough. So I switched my focus onto more interesting things.

Advertising yourself as a photographer wasn't an easy task. You had to be ruthless, and be willing to get rejected and not back down. So I did what any semi-sane person would do.

I messaged over 50 celebrities asking of they wanted to do a shoot with me. I sent them my prices, and what kinds of shoots I was willing to do. I didn't have much hope for it, but it was worth a try.

And that's where it began.

Out of all of the messages, Andrew Lincoln, AKA Rick from The Walking Dead messaged me back.

*Hello Miss y/l/n! I've actually seen quite a few of your nature shots and I have always wondered how your photos would turn out with people. I would love to be your Guinea Pig.*

He sent me days he was available and I did his shoot. After posting his pictures, my popularity shot from there.

That was a few years ago, I was now taking photos for multiple celebrities. I was ultimately known for my black and white shoots. I had, in fact, just gotten done with a shoot of A.J. Cook. She had requested *me* to take her pictures for an up and coming article that was being written about her. I, of course, gratefully said yes, being a huge fan of hers, along with the whole Criminal Minds cast.

I emailed her all of the pictures I had taken, edited and all, while simultaneously posting them on my instagram.

It was mere hours later before a notification popped up on my phone of an email that I could not believe. Theres no way that he was emailing me, right?

*You have an Email from Matthew Gray Gubler*

*Hi there! I saw your shoot on AJ's instagram and my birthday is coming up. My manager wants me to do a birthday shoot, and we both like your black and white style. I know it's not usually the kind of thing you, birthdays, do but I figured it was worth a shot, and I think you have some real talent. Let me know when you are free next. I am on a break so my schedule is relatively flexible.*

I could safely say that it was a good thing that I lived alone because I don't think I have ever screamed louder into a pillow. Matthew has been one of my favorite celebrities for the longest time. If we were going to be completely honest, once I started watching Criminal Minds, I immediately had a crush on him. This wasn't exactly the profession to be in if you were going to have a celebrity crush. I was often invited to red carpets and movie premiers, so I met quite a few stars. I never thought I would have to worry about slipping up on my professionalism.

Because I never thought I would even meet him.

My obvious answer to his request was yes. I would never *ever* miss an opportunity to have a photoshoot with someone so inspiring and meaningful to me. So I started writing an email back.

*Hi Matthew!*

Should I address him like that? Is that unprofessional?

*Hi Mr. Gubler*

Abso-fucking-lutely not.

*Hi Matthew!* We are gonna stick with that. *I don't know if this is too short of a notice, but I actually have a free spot tomorrow. (Of course if that doesn't work for you, I can figure something out for later, and try to fit it in before your birthday). I have a few ideas for props that I can send you? Let me know how I can help.*

I sent it and ran my hands through my hair, tossing my phone back onto my comforter. I had taken pictures of so many awesome celebrities:

• Selena Gomez

• Robert Downey Jr.

• Dylan O'Brien

• Grant Gustin

• Holland Roden

• Danai Gurira

But this was by far the coolest one, in my mind at least.

While waiting a little to anxiously for a reply, I decided I was going to make myself some lunch, Ramen. I set my phone on the counter as I boiled my noodles, peering over at the blank screen every few seconds (but really they felt like **minutes**).

Just as I was adding the flavour packet to the bowl my phone buzzed. I jumped slightly, spilling part of the packet out of the bowl.

"Damnit." I quickly wiped the salt into the trash can and snatched my phone, seeing another email.

*Tomorrow is actually perfect, and I would love to hear your recommendations on props, clothes, anything really. I'm going to leave my number on this email so we can have easier contact of that's okay with you.*

Wow, alright. I will now have Matthew Gray Gublers number in my phone. I made a contact for him.

**It's y/n, soooo for props. I figured I could bake you a cake! I took a few baking electives in college so I could make a really nice one and we can do something with it. I recommend you bring clothes you like to wear that are black and white. (Other colors work too, but it just looks and flows better if it's black and white). I will set the rest of the stuff up. I will be ready for you by 1 pm if that's okay.**

*You would bake me a cake?! That would be super cool thank you! I would love that. I will bring a few black and white outfits. Would it be weird if I brought a black and white Kimono?*

A chance to see Matthew in a kimono? Please yes.

**Oh my gosh please do. I would love to take pictures of you in an infamous kimono of yours.**

*Awesome! I will see you tomorrow at 1. Heres my managers info for you to sell the billing to.*

He attatched his managers email. I just sat at my kitchens island, smiling like a true dork at my phone.

**And here is my address, I run the studio at my house. What is your favorite cake and icing by the way? :)**

Was a smiley face unprofessional?

I need to chill out.

*Vanilla cake and chocolate frosting possibly? I will eat anything though probably. :)*

Now I was really smiling at my phone like a psycho idiot.

**Alrighty, see you tomorrow**

Since I didn't want to wake up too early tomorrow, I decided I was going to start the cake tonight. I had quite a few recipes held in my cabinets. I located my vanilla cake recipe and put my pre-made chocolate frosting on the counter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After about an hour of preparing, making a cake from scratch, and putting it in the oven. The cake was finally done and cooled. I added black cocoa to the frosting to make it completely black and got out my white gel.

*You made it 3 decades :)*

Was scrawled in calligraphy on the top of the cylindrical cake. I added white drips down the sides and white multi shaped sprinkles to the bottom part.

I set it in my fridge and got ready for bed. I know it's going to be hard to sleep just thinking about tomorrow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My alarm woke me up at 10 am, never before this had I woke up with a smile on my face before 12.

I took a quick shower and dressed in a white and blue floral romper with my hair in a high ponytail. Now it was time to set up backgrounds for the shoot.

I had two stations downstairs where I took all my photos. I set the first one up very normal with a white background and a rustic black stool. The second one was set up with another white background but littered with black streamers and big *30* black and white speckled balloons strung at the top.

Once I was done with all that. It was nearing 1. I slipped the cake out of the fridge and slid it onto my island. I glanced up at the clock above my stove.

*12:49*

Since I just had a little bit of time, I went a put some simple makeup on. I usually don't wear makeup when taking pictures of people, but for obvious reasons, I was making an exception.

Just as I was leaving my bathroom I heard a knock at my door. I walked swiftly to my door and opened it shakily.

"Hi!" He held up the clothes that were hung lazily over his arm. He smiled that million dollar smile and I could have sworn he looked me up and down.

Wishful thinking I guess.

"Welcome!" I stepped out of the doorway, silently inviting him in. "If you wanna set your stuff down, those stairs to the right lead you down the the studio."

"Thanks." He scurried down the stairs as I grabbed the cake and followed him down. I set it on a table that I had down there, he peered over at it and immediately burst into fits of laughter.

"I knew you had a sense of humor, so why put something normal and boring on the cake." I laughed with him as he tried to catch his breath.

"This is so perfect." He laughed a little more. "Thank you, so much." I shrugged with a smile. I posed him in front of the streamers with the cake.

He made some silly faces and smiled like there was no tomorrow. Next I brought him to the more plain station, sitting him on the stool. I looked through the lenses of the camera and glared a bit.

"Hey can you put your left leg up on the second peg of the stool?" I asked, pointing to his leg.

"This one?" He put it on the third. I shook my head. "This one?" He moved it down the the fourth. He was smiling a sly smile, seemingly challenging me.

"Let me do it for you." I had to pose people often, but posing him was going to be a little harder for me, considering I found him painfully attractive.

I moved his leg up to the second one and patted it.

"Now leave it there, so I don't have to help you again." I giggled, walking back to my camera. Taking a picture of him leaning forward on the stool and smiling. I then made him laugh and got a good genuine one of him leaning back and laughing. After all that, I proposed that we eat some cake and took a break.

I cut him a slice and handed it to him with a smile.

"So, tell me about yourself." He said, eating a bite of his cake.

"Well, I have always enjoyed photography. I love all types of art, so I also draw and paint often. And I have a black cat upstairs. His name is-" and I stopped, blood rushing to my cheeks. He is most certainly going to ask me the name, and I do not want to tell him.

He stared at me expectantly. "What is his name?" He motioned me to go on.

"Uh," I laughed a little awkwardly, setting my hands in my lap and staring at them. "His name is Spencer. As in Spencer Reid..." I glanced up at him and saw a huge grin break out on his face.

"So you like Criminal Minds? I never would have guessed. You just don't seem the type."

"Well all my memorabilia is in my room, just so people don't think I'm weird for having quite a few framed and signed posters." I smiled up at him, pushing around the remaining cake crumbs on my plate.

"One, That's not weird, that's awesome. Two, can I please meet Spencer and take pictures with him in my kimono."

I don't think I have ever heard a better sentence in my entire life.

"Yes, absolutely! I'll go get him." I clunked up the stairs on my search to find Spencer. I went to his usual spot first, my bed. Luckily he was sitting there, licking his outstretched foot. "Hi baby! You are about to take pictures with the guy you are named after. He almost as cute as you!" I grabbed him from the bed an headed back downstairs. I walked in with the accidental impeccable timing to see Matthew in his barely tied kimono, showing off his chest. My eyes widened a bit and he tied it off fully.

"Is this the famous Spencer?! He is so cute!" He reached his arms out at Spencer. My little fluff ball curled up into him instantly, cuddling into his silky kimono.

We took many many pictures of Spencer and Matthew together. I think maybe my cat likes him more than he likes me now.

"Okay, last idea. How about we just take some more up close pictures of me feeding you some cake?" It came put as a question because I didn't know how comfortable he would be with it.

"Perfect!" I cut another slice of the cake and brought it over to him. We were both sitting on the floor.

"This might be a little awkward, okay?" I giggled as I leaned back to get his whole face in the shot. This proved to be very difficult as I was using my left hand to take the picture. I fed him the cake with the right as he looked at the camera with a more seductive look. I could have melted into the floor.

I decided to switch hands so I could take the photos better, but now my very uncoordinated hand was the one picking up the cake. As I went down to get another section of the cake for another angle of feeding this sculpture of a man, I instead dipped my thumb right into the deep black frosting.

"Shit, I'm so sorry hold on." As I went to stand up and grab a napkin to wipe my thumb off, Matthew grabbed my wrist lightly.

"Hold on, uh, I have an idea, before you do anything." I sat down with a confused look. "I saw someone do this in another shoot. But we totally don't have to do it. I just thought it would be a different idea." His words were more rushed than usual.

"I'm sure I've done weirder things for other shoots, don't worry. It's *your* shoot." I reassured him, though my head was swimming wondering what he was going to do.

"Ok. So. What I'm going to do is put your thumb in my mouth, and I'm basically gonna, uh, suck on it while kinda smiling?" He could barely get through the whole thing without laughing.

"Alright, weird request but I like it!" I giggled for what seemed like the 30th time today. "And to make you feel better, yes, I have done weirder."

"Thank God."

"So I am guessing you want me to do something like this with the rest of my hand, ya know, the part that's not in your mouth." I stated as I placed my hand on his cheek. He let a slow breath out, staring into my eyes.

"Yeah, exactly."

"Okay." I said with a shrug, grabbing my camera from the ground. He opened his mouth with an all too familiar wide grin as I placed my thumb in. His mouth closed around it and he smiled, just a little. I brought my camera to my face, capturing the moment that I would have forever in my mind and in a small frame on my bedroom wall, for sure.

I slipped my thumb from his mouth and watched as his face turned extremely red. To save him embarrassment, I immediately stood up and grabbed a napkin to wipe the rest of the frosting off.

"Can I see it?" He motioned to the camera. I nodded, sitting down right beside him, showing him the picture. It showed off a closer look at the rose tattoos I had near my wrists and the shiny watch that was gifted to me by my mom. "It turned out good! I really hope I didn't make you uncomfortable."

"Oh no! Of course not. Total opposite." As soon as I said that I regretted it.

"So that made you extremely comfortable?" A sly smile was making it's way onto his face.

"That's, that's not- You know what? Sure, yes." I chuckled. "You don't really make me uncomfortable at all to be honest. So no, you didn't make me uncomfortable."

"Well I'm glad." He smiled and we sat in silence for a moment.

"Well I guess that's it yeah?" He nodded. "Well this was fun. Thanks for being an excellent subject to take pictures of."

He gathered his stuff as we went back upstairs. Once at the door, Spencer came up to him, rubbing on his leg. He bent over to pet him.

"So, I'm not sure if you are single or not." I could feel the blood draining from my face. Was this really happening right now? "But I wanted to know if you wanted to go on a date?"

Yes, this was happening right now.

"Really?" I could tell I sounded extremely excited, but at this point, I didn't even care.

"Yeah, you are super laid back, funny, talented, and you aren't scared away by how weird I am." He laughed, "So yes?"

"I would absolutely love to."

"Great. I'll text you." He winked and waved as he closed the door, leaving.

My back went against the door. I couldn't keep in the squeal so I just embraced it and squealed my heart out, doing a little dance.

Which was quickly ended when I heard a knock at the door.

"I'm sorry, I want to get to know you better immediately." He let out a nervous chuckle. "Are you free for the rest of the day?" I was sure that my face was red as a tomato.

"Yes I am." He grabbed my hand, dragging me outside.

"Then let's go."

[radishaur]

What about Zuko having a crush on the reader? Like it’s season 2, Uncle Iroh and Zuko open the Jasmine Dragon and reader is just a regular customer who comes in for the tea. Would Zuko deny his feelings or try to flirt or blush alot 🥺 thank you!

I absolutely love Season 2 Zuko so I’m super excited to write this! There’s just something about “Lee” that makes my heart melt. But then again, that’s just Zuko for you. Anyways, I hope this is what you were looking for!

- Zoe

•••

Jasmine Tea (Zuko x Reader)

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff

Part: 1/1

Summary: See Request

•••

Working in a tea shop was the last thing I wanted to be doing. Having to force a smile onto my face while serving tea to useless civilians who were likely going to complain about their orders was not the life I wanted. Uncle insisted that this was necessary in order for us to pay for the small apartment we had.

I had to admit that he was right, but that didn’t make me feel any better. I was used to living in the palace like I deserved, not having to slave away all day to barely pass by.

“Lee, there’s a customer at table 2. Why don’t you go take their order?” Uncle said, snapping me out of my thoughts.

He was looking at me with a mischievous smile. I rolled my eyes and went to table 2 as he asked. I grabbed the notepad and pen out of my apron before stopping at the table.

“Welcome to the Pao Family Tea Shop. What can I get for you today?” I asked, trying my best to not gauge my eyes out.

The person sitting at the table lifted their head to meet my gaze and I felt my heart flutter.

“What would you recommend? I’ve never come here before,” she admitted, a pleasant smile on her face.

I blinked in shock for a few seconds. The girl sitting in front of me was shockingly beautiful. Her (h/c) hair flowed freely around her face and her (e/c) eyes shone with the light of a million stars. I blushed profusely when I realized that I was staring.

“I uh... W-Well uh, my favorite is the jasmine tea,” I stammered, furiously fighting the blush that was spreading across my face.

“Jasmine tea sounds lovely. I’ll have one of those,” she said, giggling slightly at my sudden change of demeanor.

I nodded and immediately turned around, making a bee line for the kitchen. I shut the door and hit the back of my head against it. It felt like there were butterflies in my stomach. I groaned. Why did this have to happen to me now?

“She’s very pretty,” my Uncle mused, startling me into a standing position.

“Uncle!” I hissed as the blush that had just disappeared began to come back.

“What did she order?” he asked, beginning to heat a pot on the stove.

“Jasmine tea,” I mumbled.

“Ah. Isn’t that your favorite, Prince Zuko?” Uncle asked, smirking over his shoulder at me.

I could feel the tips of my ears heating up. Agni, this was embarrassing. Why did he always have to do this?

“I’m going back outside,” I huffed, glaring at him before going back into the front.

I continued to take orders and bring people their tea, all the while sneaking glances at the girl at table 2. There were a few times when my eyes met hers and I could immediately whip my head around. My blush only grew worse when I heard her giggling quietly after each time.

Uncle handed me the tray of tea and winked at me, causing me to hiss another Uncle at him before walking out towards her table. My hands were shaking slightly as I walked. I placed the tray down on her table, which caught her attention.

“Oh! Thank you, uh...,” she started, trailing off when she realized she didn’t actually know my name.

“Uh, Lee,” I said softly.

“Thank you, Lee. My name is Y/N,” she introduced with a smile.

I felt my heart flutter once more and a small blush once again dusted my cheeks. Her voice was beautiful. I wished she could have said my real name.

Wait, what?

I found myself blushing harder upon realizing what I had just thought. What the Agni was I thinking? This was no time to start crushing on someone. I had more important things to worry about.

“Y-You’re welcome. Nice to meet you,” I mumbled.

I began to walk away when I heard her say my name. I stopped and looked at her, my heart rate increasing tenfold.

“Not that I’m complaining, but I believe I only ordered one cup,” she pointed out.

I was about to ask what she meant, but when I looked at the tray there was two cups. I blinked in surprise for a moment. I had been so nervous about serving her her tea that I hadn’t even noticed the extra cup.

“Oh. I’m sorry,” I apologized, not sure what more to say.

“You said jasmine tea was your favorite, yes?” she asked, smiling slightly.

I nodded, not trusting my voice at the moment. My heart was racing so fast I thought I might just croak out nothing if I tried to say anything.

“Why don’t you have it? I’d love the company if you’d like to join me,” she offered, the pleasant smile from earlier gracing her featured again.

“Uh, well I’m actually uh...technically I’m still-“ I began to say before my Uncle cut me off.

“Lee! I believe it is time for your break,” he called out from behind the counter.

I glared at him, not missing the knowing smile he wore. He had totally planned this out.

“So, does that mean you’ll join me?” she asked hopefully, bringing my attention back to her.

“Sure,” I managed to say.

I slid into the seat across from her and began to sip my tea. Our conversation flowed quite easily and I was surprised to find myself genuinely enjoying the company. At the end of my break, I realized that somewhere along the way I had begun to smile.

This became our routine. She would come in every few days and I would spend my break and then my lunch talking with her. Sometimes she would stay late and help clean up.

One day, she came in with an even wider grin than usual. It made my stomach feel all warm and fuzzy.

“Hi Lee. Mushi,” she greeted, leaning against the counter excitedly.

“You seem happy today,” Uncle pointed out, a lazy smile greeting the girl.

“Today’s the first night of the festival! Of course I’m excited,” she exclaimed, clutching her hands to her chest happily.

“A festival?” I asked, curious as to what she was talking about.

As my Uncle brought out her usual jasmine tea, she began explaining to us that the festival lasted all week and was made to celebrate the Earth Kingdom and encourage the peace and happiness of its citizens. There were food carts and street performers and even fireworks at the end of the night. By the end of the explanation, Y/N was practically glowing.

“That sounds like fun,” I said, a nostalgic smile on my face as I remembered the festivals I had gone to back in the Fire Nation.

“It is! I’d love to take you,” she said, a gentle smile on her face.

“W-What?” I stammered.

“He would love to,” Uncle answered, placing his hand on my shoulder with a smile.

“Awesome! I’m so excited. I’m gonna get ready and then I’ll meet you outside the shop,” she said, smiling happily before taking off.

My Uncle insisted on helping me get ready, despite my constant insisting that this was not a date. He mumbled something under his breath about young love and how naive I was and forced me to let him do my hair. I sighed and relented. As soon as he was done, I walked outside the shop and began looking around for her nervously.

“Lee!” she exclaimed from further up the road.

I turned to her and smiled. I felt my heart stop as soon as my eyes landed on her. She was breathtaking. She had done her hair beautifully and she had dressed up for the festival as well. The beautiful greens and browns of her outfit complimented her eyes perfectly. I found myself blushing once more as she came close and hugged me. She pulled away before I could hug back.

“I’m so excited! There’s so many things I want to show you,” she exclaimed, grabbing my hand and dragging me down the street towards the festivities.

I felt my hand light up as soon as she touched it and my heart practically burst. I was desperately fighting a blush as she weaved through the crowd. I held onto her hand tightly so I didn’t lose her.

“First stop, food,” she exclaimed, stopping in front of a noodle cart.

“These are just noodles,” I sighed, knowing they wouldn’t compare to the spicy noodles from home that I was so used to.

“Ugh, just look at the menu and order something. My treat,” she insisted.

I rolled my eyes but did as she asked. To my surprise, they actually did have spicy noodles although I figured they wouldn’t be nearly as spicy as the ones I was used to.

We ordered and I watched as she handed me my bowl excitedly. I was about to start looking around for somewhere to sit before she began dragging me behind her once more.

“Where are you going? Aren’t we gonna eat?” I asked as she held my wrist.

“We are! With a show,” she said, stopping in front of a wooden stage.

“A show?” I asked, tilting my head in confusion.

She yanked me down to the floor, spilling some of my broth in the process. She giggled and apologized as she sat down next to me. She began eating as someone walked onto the stage.

“Welcome to the show ladies and gentlemen!” he explained, throwing his arms out to either side and bowing.

The crowd went wild.

“This is Quinn. He’s one of the greatest performers in the city. He works with fire,” Y/N explained.

“He’s a firebender?” I questioned in shock.

“What? No silly. He just performs with it. Big difference,” she joked, poking me slightly in the side before adding, “Truthfully I think it would be cool if he was.”

“You do?” I asked warily.

I wasn’t even paying attention to the man as he swung around poles of fire. I was fully focused on what Y/N had just said.

“I think it would just prove that not every firebender is bad,” she said softly, the pleasant smile returning to her face as she watched the show.

I let her words sink in as I watched the show. Quinn was twirling and throwing the poles around and masterfully avoiding the fire. He almost looked like a firebender. His final trick was to blow the fire out towards the crowd. The whole crowd burst out into cheers and clapped as he took a final bow and left the stage.

“That was amazing,” I admitted, setting my now finished bowl of noodles to the side.

“I know, right? Now there’s one last place I want to bring you,” she said, taking hold of my hand once more before taking off.

I followed dutifully after her, not that I had much choice. Her grip was surprisingly strong. The sounds of the festival grew quieter and quieter the further we got from the city. Pretty soon, we were on the outskirts of the town and heading up a small hill. It had a tree in the middle of it and a small dirt path leading up to a bench underneath.

She squealed excitedly as she raced up the hill, leaving me to trail behind her. She sat down on the bench and I sat next to her timidly.

“What uh.....what are we doing here?” I asked hesitantly.

“This is the best view of the fireworks,” she grinned, gesturing up at the sky that was filled with stars and would soon be filled with fireworks.

“Oh,” I said, letting myself relax slightly.

“So, I feel like I should admit something,” Y/N sighed, turning to face me.

“What is it?” I asked, the nerves slowly coming back.

“I haven’t been honest about who I am, exactly....,” she trailed off, picking at her nails out of habit.

“Who are you? I asked quietly.

“Remember how I told you I was a refugee from another Earth Kingdom town? Well, that was kind of a lie,” she admitted, turning to look at me nervously.

“Are you from one of the Water Tribes? You don’t look....uh..... like a waterbender,” I mumbled, caught off guard by her admission.

She sighed, letting a painful smile take her face. It made my stomach churn. I wanted her happy smile back.

“I’m.....actually from the colonies. Both of my parents are Fire Nation. And...I know who you are too,” she whispered, tears brimming on her eyes.

I sat, shocked into silence. I could hear her sniffle and begin to stand, muttering something about how she was sorry and she would go. I grabbed her wrist and kept her from leaving. She turned to look at me and I couldn’t help but stand and wipe the tears off her cheeks.

“I’m so sorry,” she cried, regret written across her face, “I didn’t mean to keep lying, I just didn’t know what to say. I didn’t want you to think I was using you.”

“Were you?” I asked quietly, afraid to hear the answer.

The fireworks were now bursting in the air, sending spurts of color across the sky. I dropped my grip from her arm, but she didn’t run. Instead, she looked up at me and took a step closer.

“Not even for a second. I swear. I.....I really like you,” she answered, her genuine smile back on her face.

I brought one hand up to her cheek and glanced at her lips. I felt like they were calling to me. I slowly wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close to me. I wanted nothing more than to close the minuscule distance between us. I looked down at her for permission.

She gazed up at me and smiled. I took that as a yes.

The fireworks cast a blanket of colored light over us as our lips met. I had never felt happier than in that moment. Kissing her felt like no other kiss I’d ever had. It was special.

I pulled away and rested my forehead on hers.

“Zuko, I- I mean Lee,” she corrected blushing slightly as she spoke.

“No. Call me Zuko. I like when you say my name,” I whispered, blushing as well.

“I love you, Zuko.”

“I love you too, Y/N.”

[hockeynascarfan91258]

A/N: Links to Chapter 1-3 posted at bottom of page!

Chapter 4

It had been a few days since Eden left Sids after they raped her.    She called out sick from work she couldn't face them.    The team was headed out to California and Eden asked if she could fly out and meet the team there.    They said that was fine.     Eden went out a day early and did some sight seeing.       It was nice.     The team arrived later that day.     She had just gotten finished eating when there was a knock at the door.    Eden goes and sees it was Sid.

"Eden please open the door." Sid says.

He had carnations her favorite in his hands and a stuffed Panda bear too.   Eden figured she might as well hear him out.    She opens the door.  

"What Sid?" Eden says.

"I am sorry for what I did to you the other day." Sid says.

"Oh you mean raping me when I said no." Eden replies snarky.

"Yes I am sorry baby.   It will never happen again.     Kris is sorry too these are from us." Sid says.

"Look let's just let by gones be bygones.   I  won't say anything about what happened.   I won't tell your secret." Eden says.

"Please baby.    Think about it.    We really do love you." Sid says.

"Okay I will think about it okay." Eden says.

"Good baby.    We love you and don't want to loose you." Sid says.

"I will think about it okay.   Now I just want to go lie down.   I am not feeling well." Eden says.

"Okay feel better." Sid says kissing her softly on the lips.

"Thanks Sid.   Goodnight I will see you at practice tomorrow." Eden replies.

"Okay baby." Sid says kissing her head.

Eden took the flowers and Panda and shut the door behind him.    She wasn't thinking about anything she was walking out of this and going to be with Chase.  

That was when her phone went off. It was Chase.

"Meet me down in the lobby." Chase texts.

"Wait you're here!" Eden texts back.

"Yup got a race here in Cali and then racing Phoenix and Vegas." Chase says.

"Let me change and I'll be right down." Eden says.

She throws on a pair of jeans and a black be brave shirt.    She then heads down to the lobby.

Chase was standing there waiting for her. She runs to him.

"Chase." Eden exclaims practically jumping on him.

"Hey princess." Chase says kissing her.

Eden kisses back not caring who was watching.

"I'm so happy you are here." Eden says.

"I am happy too I get too see my girl. Now let's go I have a special date planned just the two of us." Chase says.

They link hands and head out to them rental car. They both get in. Chase takes off towards San Diego.

"Where are we going?" Eden asks.

"You will see." Chase says smiling at her.

45 minutes later they arrive at the zoo.

"The San Diego Zoo!" Eden  says excitedly.

'Well I know how much you love animals especially pandas so I figured I needed to bring you." Chase  says.

They park. They then head to the entrance. Chase  pays for them them. They find out there was a bus called the Kangaroo Bus that would drop them off at various parts of the park. They get on the bus and it takes them to the first part of the zoo. The Australian Outback. Inside there they see the Australian Wander which was full of plants that come from down under, along with Camels, Koalas. Laughing Kookabura's, Tasmanian Devils and Wombats.

It was fun. They got to hold a koala, play with a kangaroo and ride a camel together.

Eden was taking all kinds of pictures.

From there they head into the Lost Forest exhibit,. There they see Bog Garden, Bonabo's , Fern Canyon, Flamingos, Ginger Garden, harpy eagels, Hawaiian pants, Hippo's, Mandrills, Monkey's, Okapi's, orangutans, Otter's and pygmy Hippos pygmy marmosets, Tapirs, terrace lagoon, and Tigers.

"I want a hippo for Christmas is one of my favorite Xmas songs so I love hippos." Eden says.

"They are intriguing animals." Chase says.

They continue on. They were holding hands and acting like a real couple and Eden was loving it. They then get on the Kangaroo bus and head to the nest spot for them. They then do the Panda Canyon, where they see Amur Leopard's, Giant Panda's red pandas and Takins.

"Pandas are my absolute favorite animal in the whole wide world." Eden says.

"I know now come with me." Chase says.

They head behind the habitat where they met a zookeeper. Chase paid extra for them to be able to play with one of the panda's. It was one of the Cubs born not that long ago. Also Eden was adopting it and could name it. Eden was having the time of her life. Chase had them take picture and a video. She ended up naming the bear Chase. Finally they leave.

"Thank you for doing that for me. I love it." Eden says.

"I am glad baby." Chase says.

That was when Eden ran to the trash can and threw up. Chase held her hair back. He also got her ginger Ale.

"Do you want to go home?" Chase asks.

"Nope I'm okay now." Eden says.

They then head to the Africa Rocks where they got to see and play with the penguins.

They head around the zoo seeing more different animals. They saved the best for last where Eden  got to see the polar bears another one of her favorites. It was neat to see them out playing. Eden  took more pictures.    Finally they headed to the gift shop and Eden got a few things. Chase got her a few things as well and they left.

"Thank you Clyde for a much needed fun day." Eden says.

"You are welcome Princes." Chase says.

"Our first official date." Eden says.

"And it's not over yet." Chase says.

They hop in the car and head back towards Los Angeles.    Chase heads to Disneyland and parks.

"Disneyland baby?" Eden asks.

"But of course. Have to take my Princess to the happiest place on earth." Chase replies.

"I love you." Eden says.

"I love you more princess." Chase replies kissing her hand.

He then gets out of the car and gets her door. Eden gets out and they head to Disneyland hand in hand. They head inside and   stop first at Sleeping Beauty's castle and have someone take a picture of them in front.   

They got a few different ones including of one of them kissing.   After that they head to start riding rides.   They  get on Alice and Wonderland, Astro Orbiter, Autopia, Big Thunder Mountain, Buzz Lightyear Astro Blasters, Casey Jr. Circus Train, Chip and Dale's tree house, the Disney Gallery, Disney Railroad, The Disneyland Story presenting Great moments with Mr. Lincoln, Donald's Boat, Enchanted Tiki Room, Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage, Frontierland Shootin' Exposition, Gadget's Go Coaster, Goofy's playhouse, Indiana Jones adventure, It's a small world, Jungle Cruise, King Arthur's Carrousel, Mad Tea Party, Main Street Cinema, The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh, Mark Twain Riverboat, Matterhorn Bobsleds, Mickey's house and meet Mickey, Minnie's house, Mr. Toads Wild Ride, Peter Pan's Flight, Pincchio's Darin Journey, Pirates Lair on Tom Sawyers Island, Pirates of the Caribbean, Roger Rabbits Car Toon Spin, Snow Whites Scary adventure, Space Mountain, Star Tours The Adventure continues, Star wars Launch Bay, Star Wars Path of the Jedi, Storybook land canal boats, Tarzan's treehouse, Dumbo the flying elephant, Haunted Mansion, Main street vehicles, Splash Mountain, Davey Crockett's Explorer canoes, and Sailing Ship Colombia.  

"I am hungry." Eden says after they finished riding the rides.

"Me too." Chase  replies.

"Let's  eat and then we can continue on." Eden  says.

"Sounds good.:" Chase  says.

They decide to eat at the Carnation Café.    They both get burgers and fries and milkshakes.    After they eat they head and do a few shows.   They do a Star Wars Character Experience and then they do Jedi Training.   That was fun they then meet fairy friends at Pixie Hallow and meet the Disney princess at Royal Hall. Chase took a few pictures of Eden. He got a her few things. He figured for Halloween she could be a princess and he would be a race car driver.

They  continue on and get on Animation Academy, Fliks Flyers, Francis Ladybug Boggie, Golden Zephyr, Goofy's sky school, Guardians of the Galaxy: Mission Breakout, Heimlich's chew chew train, it's tough to be a bug, Jumpin Jellyfish, King Triton's carousel, The Little Mermaid: Ariel's undersea adventure, Luigi's Rollickin Roadsters, Maters Junkyard Jamboree, Monsters Inc. Mike and Sully to the rescue, Princess Dot Puddle Park, Radiator Springs racers, Red car trolley, Silly Symphony Swings, Soarin around the world, Sorcerers workshop, Toy Story Midway Mania, Tuck and Rolls Drive em buggies, Turtle Talk with Crush, The Bakery Tour, California Screamin, Games of the Boardwalk, Grizzly River run, Mickey's Fun Wheel, Redwood Creek Challenge trail, Frozen at Disneyland resort, and Guardians of the Galaxy: Monsters after dark.

They then head and see Ana and Elsa's Royal Welcome, Frozen Live at Hyperion, Meet Olaf, and Meet the Residents of Radiator Springs in Cars land.

Finally, they head back to the car and head to Universal Studios.   They go inside and get on rides.   They ride on Harry Potter and the Forbidden journey, The Wizarding World Of Harry Potter, Flight of the Hippogrif, Fast and the Furious Supercharged, King Kong 360, The Walking Dead attraction, Despicable Me Minion Mayhem, Jurassic Park the ride, Transformers The ride, The Simpson Ride, Revenge of the Mummy Ride, Super Silly Fun Land, Sill Swirly Fun Ride, Special Effects show, Water World, Universal's animal actors, and Charter sightings.

They finish everything they wanted to do at the park before heading back to the car.

They then head back to the car and back to the track. Chase  had something special planned for them. He had it set up and ready to go.

"What's this?" Eden says seeing a table set up for two.

"Dinner for two baby." Chase says.

"Awww Clyde." Eden says kissing him.

Chase kisses back. He then helps her sit down.

He goes and heats up their food. He had made chicken parmigiana and noodles along with a salad. When it was done he sits it in the table and then takes his seat. They each take a piece of chicken and some noodles.   They then add a little bit more sauce to each before sprinkling it with parmesan cheese.   They put some salad in their salad bowls and add the dressing.   Chase pours them each a glass of wine.

Eden takes a bite of the food and then says

"Oh my god it tastes as good as it smells."

"Thanks.   The sauce is my mothers homemade recipe." Chase  says.

"Well it's good." Eden  says.

They eat and enjoy each others company.   Once they finished Eden helped Chase  clean up and put the leftovers away and load the dishwasher.

"The flowers are for you." Chase says to her.

"Thank you Clyde.  Carnations are my favorite flower and pink is my favorite color." Eden  says.

"I know baby." Chase says.

"So wha are we going to watch?" Eden  asks.

"Since  I know how much you love scary movies I have the Conjuring universe movies ready to go." Chase replies.

"Lead the way." Eden says.

Chase lead her to the game room.   They both sit on the couch as Chase turns on the Nun.   The movie starts.    Not even five minutes into it Chase jumps at a scary part.

"Damn." Chase says.

"You really hate scary movies don't you?" Eden asks.

"Yes I do.    But I will watch them because I know you like them." Chase says.

"Well I will keep you safe Clyde." Eden says.

"I know." Chase says as another scary part happens.

They movie went on.   Eden felt him get a little tense and knew he was scared so she leaned in a little closer trying to comfort him.   Chase puts his arm around her pulling her closer to him.  She leaned her head on his shoulder.  

It got to the part where the priest was buried A alive.    Chase started to shake.   That was one of his phobias being trapped someplace not being able to get out.   He was claustrophobic.

"Oh Chase." Eden says leaning in placing a soft kiss on his lips.

She would do anything at that moment to make him feel better.   She never experienced a man so vulnerable.

Chase kisses back putting his hands on each side of her cheeks.  Eden parts her lips slightly.   Chase deepens the kiss exploring her mouth with his tongue.

"Mmm." Chase moans deep in his throat.

"Mmm." Eden moans too.

"God Princess ." Chase says once they both come up for air.

"You are a good kisser Clyde." Eden says.

"So are you Princess." Chase replies.

  She looks deep into his eyes and sees a bunch of emotion swirling in them.

Chase leans in kissing her again pulling her all but into his lap.   His hands roam up the back of her shirt setting her skin on fire. 

"God Clyde take me to bed." Eden moans when he let her up for air again.

"God baby are you sure?" Chase asks.

"God yes." Eden says she wanted him so bad.

Chase picks her up carrying her into his bedroom.   He sits her on her feet closing the door.    Once the door was closed Eden pushes him up against it.

"Eden." Chase moans.

"I want you and I am going to take you." Eden says.

"I want you too." Chade says.

She starts to lift his shirt up placing soft kisses along his chest as she does.

"Fuck." Chase moans.

Once she gets the shirt up and and over his she throws it to the floor.

"You have the most amazing body Clyde." Eden says running her nails lightly down his chest to the band of his jeans.

"Thanks Princess oh god." Chase moans as she pops open the button and pulls the zipper down running her finger up his happy trail.

She works the jeans down his hips kissing his stomach with light fluttery kisses as she does.  Chase just moans.

She then works his boxer briefs down as well freeing his rock hard cock.   Eden licks her lips.  She places soft kisses on his stomach again before running her tongue down his happy trail.   She places soft kisses on each thigh before slowly taking his cock into her mouth.

"Fuck Eden." Chase moans running his fingers through her hair.

She sucks him in nice and slow running her tongue along the underside of his shaft.   She looks up locking eyes with him.   She keeps sucking him in and out of her mouth slowly.

"Fuck Eden that's it suck my dick baby." Chase moans gently pulling her hair as he starts to thrust.

Eden kept going slowly torturing him bringing him to the verge of cumming.

"God baby I am going to cum." Chase moans he didn't know what she wanted.

Eden gently starts to play with his balls never taking her eyes off him.

"Princess oh god." Chase moans as he cums hard down her throat.

Eden swallows every drop before slowly licking him clean.   She then slowly works her way back up his body pulling him in for a kiss.   She explores every inch of his mouth with her tongue letting him taste himself on her lips and tongue.   Chase slowly backs her towards the bed.  He breaks the kiss long enough to pull her shirt over her head tossing it.

"Jesus Eden that bra." Chase moans seeing it.

He pulls one strap down kissing her shoulder as he does.  Then kisses the other as he pulls that strap down.   He sucks and licks the tops of each breast peaking out from the cup.   He pulls the cups down taking one in his mouth running a circle around her nipple with his tongue before sucking on it gently nibbling on it bringing it to a peak.

"Clyde." Eden moans running her fingers in his hair.  

Chase moves to the other breast doing the same thing.   He slowly unclasps the bra pulling it off tossing it aside as well.    He then kisses softly down her stomach to the band of her jeans. 

He uses his teeth to pop open the button lightly nibbling on her belly as he slowly inches them down her hips and legs. Eden steps out of them kicking off her shoes.

"God baby those panties.  God so wet." Chase moans running his mouth over her pussy smelling her juices.

He then slowly works them down over her hips and down her legs.     Eden kicks them off.   He then slowly kisses his way up her legs placing a kiss on each thigh.   He blows cool breath across her mound as she slowly spreads her legs.   He runs his tongue up and down her slit before pushing inside starting to fuck her with his tongue. 

Not long after he started Eden gently pulls his hair pulling him away from her.

"Fuck me Clyde." Eden  says all but begging him.

"God okay baby."  Chase says kissing his way up her body.   He picks her up kissing her letting her taste her on his lips and tongue and gently lays her down on the bed.

"God please Clyde I need you inside me now." Eden moans.

"God baby." Chase moans as he gently pushes inside her.

"God yes." Eden moans as he starts to thrust gently at first.

He wanted to go slow letting her adjust to his size.   She was so tight and wet.

"Jesus Eden you feel so good.  Like a glove." Chase moans.

"God fuck me Clyde hard and fast." Eden moans digging her nails into his back.

Chase moves a little harder and faster.   Eden wraps her legs around his waist letting him go deeper inside her.

"Eden oh god." Chase moans going even harder.

"Clyde god that's it." Eden moans as he stretched her even further.

She throws her head back arching into him.  It felt so good.

"God baby I am not going to last." Chase moans

"Cum baby let me feel it." Eden monas.

"Eden sweet Eden." Chase moans looking deep into her eyes as he cums hard deep inside her.

"Clyde oh god." Eden moans shuttering as her orgasm rushes through her.

She cums with him feeling him coat her insides.   She just moans as her body shutters from the pleasure.

Chase kisses her gently on the lips and then the jaw and neck as they ride it out.   

"God Clyde again  I need you again." Eden moans.

She just wanted to feel that good again and not think about anything.

"Okay Eden but this time it will be nice and slow." Chase says.

"Please." Eden begs.

Chase starts to move again inside her taking it nice and slow.

"Eden god." Chase moans loving being inside her.

"Clyde god." Eden moans as he slowly builds her up.

"So close." Eden moans.

"Cum baby." Chase moans.

"Clyde." Eden moans as she cums.

"That's it baby milk my release." Chase moans as he cums again inside her.

They make love a few more times before Eden's eyelashes started to flutter.   Chase gets up.

"Where are you going?" Eden asks sleepily.

"Shhh baby I will be back." Chase says kissing her softly on the lips.

He goes into the bathroom grabbing a wash cloth wetting it with warm water.   He then comes over and gently wipes her down cleaning her.

He goes and tosses the rag in the hamper and then climbs into bed beside her.   She curls up to him laying her head on his chest.   Chase pulls the blanket up over them kissing her head as they both fall asleep.

**************************

The next morning Eden and Chase woke up when the alarm went off.

"Good morning baby:" Chase says.

"Good morning, oh god." Eden says getting up and running to the bathroom.

She made it just in time to empty her stomach in the toilet. Chase was right behind her. She got her everything up. Chase then picks her up gently and carries her back to bed.

"Sorry baby." Eden says.

"For what?" Chase asks.

"Getting sick." Eden replies.

"It's okay." Chase replies.

"I need to go back. I have to change before I head to practice." Eden replies.

"Yeah I know. I am glad I was able to see you." Chase says.

"Me too I will try and make the race on Sunday." Eden adds.

Chase smiles. He gives her a few shirts from his collection. They then head to the car and head back to Eden's hotel.

"I will see you later princess. I love you." Chase says.

"I will see you later Clyde. I love you too." Eden replies.

They share a few more kisses not wanting to part ways. But finally Eden heads inside and up to her room. She showered and got dressed and then heads down to the bus. Once everyone was on they head to the arena. Eden goes and gets the exam room set up in case they would need it for anything. That was when she felt arms snake around her waist.

"Hey baby, I missed you last night." Sid says.

"Hi Sid. Sorry I was so tired. Still getting used to the time change." Eden replies lying.

She didn't know what he would do if he knew she was with Chase. She was scared of him. It sucked cus she had a contract and had to work with the Penguins until the end of the 2021 season. Even though she wanted to quit.

"I know it can take effect on you but you will get used to it." Sid says.

"I know. Don't you have practice?" Eden asks.

" I do but I wanted to know if you were doing anything after?" Sid asks.

"No I don't. Sunday I am going to the NASCAR race before the game that night. But nothing today." Eden replies.

"Okay maybe I can come to your room, we can order room service and watch movies." Sid says.

"Okay." Eden says.

"Good see you then." Sid replies.

"Is Kris coming too?" Eden asks.

"Nope just me this time." Sid says.

"Okay." Eden replies.

Sid kisses her and leaves to attend practice. Eden grabs a little something from the snack bar and goes and watches practice. Halfway through Kris took a high stick to the face and there was blood.

"I got it." Eden says.

Kris comes down the runway and into the exam room. Eden follows him in. Kris was sitting on the table.

"Damn that hurt like a son of a bitch." Kris says.

"Sorry Kris." Eden says dabbing the blood away with a towel.

"It's okay. Is it bad?" Kris asks.

"Yes going to need stitches but shouldn't keep you out of the game tomorrow." Eden says.

"Good." Kris says.

Eden stitches him up. Kris puts his hand over hers.

"Thank you. Sorry for the other day Eden. Are you okay?" Kris asks.

"Yeah I'm okay. And your welcome it's my job." Eden says.

"I know. Im still thankful for you." Kris says.

"I know. I don't know what's going to happen between us but I promise I won't tell anyone about you and Sid. I just don't think I can do this. It took me to moving away and being away from him to realize how much I love Chase." Eden says.

"I know I can tell. Look if you want out that is fine. I know you won't tell anyone about me and Sid but I don't know if Sid will let you go." Kris says.

"I know." Eden says.

"Did you ever love us?" Kris asks.

"I loved you Kris you never hurt me.   Sid in the other hand." Eden says looking down.

"I'm sorry he hurt you Eden." Kris says lifting her head up.

He leans in and kisses her.    Eden kisses back.

"God." Eden moans as she pulls away.

"Go lock the door." Kris says.

Eden goes and locks the door.     She comes back over and climbs into his lap.

"God." Eden moans as he shreds her panties.

"I like skirts." Kris says.

"God." Eden moans as Kris pushes up into her.

"Ride me pretty girl. You know you want to." Kris says.

"God Kris." Eden moans as she starts to move up and down.

"That's it pretty girl." Kris says grabbing her hips.

They needed to be faster. Kris took control of their movements. Eden bit her arm throwing her head back to keep from screaming out. Kris nips and sucks her neck as they move.

"Eden fuck." Kris calls out as he cums hard deep inside of her.

"Kris. "Eden moans out as she cums with him.

They ride it out and Kris picks her up off of him. He stands up and fixes himself.

Kris then kisses her head before walking out the door. Eden collected herself. She then cleans up the exam room and prepared it from the game tomorrow. She then heads out and gets on the bus.

Once all the boys were on board they all head back to the hotel. Eden goes up to her room. She changes into her new Chase Elliott shirt and a pair of lounge pants. She wasn't feeling the greatest. She was laying down when there was a knock at her door. She gets up and opens it. Sid was there with room service and flowers.

"Come in." Eden says letting him in.

"Thanks." Sid says kissing her cheek.

Eden shuts the door.

"What did you bring?" Eden asks.

"Chicken noodle soup and ginger ale. Because I know you said you weren't feeling good." Sid says.

"I am not." Eden replies.

"I am sorry. Well let's eat and then we can relax and watch something on Netflix or something." Sid says.

Eden nods her head yes. So far it was going okay and she wasn't afraid. This was the Sid she started dating. They ate the soup and Eden nibbled the saltines. She sipped the ginger ale. Finally they laid in bed and Eden turned on Netflix. She turned on Sweet Home Alabama one of her favorite movies. She started to think about Chase. This movie was the story of their lives. Sid started to kiss her. Eden kisses back closing her eyes. As they were making out Sid runs his hands down her body. He runs them down her pants and under wear rubbing her pussy before sticking a finger in.

"Hmm nice and wet for me pretty girl." Sid says.

"Yes." Eden moans. She was pretending it was Chase.

"Want me to fuck you pretty girl?" Sid asks.

"Please." Eden begs.

Sid slides her pants and panties off followed by his jeans and boxer briefs. He then hovers over her running his tip along her entrance.

"Soaking for daddy." Sid moans.

"God don't tease." Eden begs.

Sid pushes into her and starts to move thrusting hard and fast.

"Fuck baby." Sid moans as she moves with him.

She wrapped her legs around his waist letting him go deeper.

"God." Eden moans digging her nails into his back.

She still had her eyes closed pretending it was Chase fucking her.

"That's it pretty girl milk my cock baby get ready to take my cum." Sid moans.

"GOd." Eden moans she was almost there.

"Fuck Eden god." Sid moans as he cums hard pumping her pussy full of his cum.

"Clyde oh god Clyde." Eden calls out as she cums too.

"What the fuck did you just call me?" Sid shouts slapping her.

Eden's eyes flashed open and she realized that by her fantasizing about Chase she called out his name.

"Umm." Eden says.

"Did you call me Clyde? Were you thinking about another man while I was fucking you." Sid screams at her.

Eden was so scared she didn't know what to say.

"Answer me you ungrateful ass whore." Sid screams.

"Yes I am so disgusted by you and how you treat me that in order for me to even attempt to have sex I have to think about Chase so I can get off." Eden screams out pushing him off of her.

She gets up off the bed. She was going to hide in the bathroom or something. She had her cell phone.

"You fucking whore. Don't you ever push me again or I will rip your hair out and choke you with it." Sid yells grabbing her hair pulling her back to him.

"Ow you are hurting me." Eden says.

"You think I fucking care. I hope it hurts. Remeber I am the only guy besides Kris who can cum in your sweet pussy. We are the only ones who can fuck you." Sid says.

"Fuck off Sid. I want out of this. I can't stand you. I fucking hate you. Get out." Eden screams turning around wailing out on him.

"You want to hit me bitch. I am going to show you." Sid says.

He picks her up throwing her back into the mirror glass shattering. He bashes her head against it not caring that it busted her head open. He then throws her down onto the floor throwing the mirror down on top of her covering her in glass.

"I will kill you before I ever let you leave." Sid says.

"Please I need help." Eden cries out.

"Fuck that bleed for all I care. If I can't have you no one will." Sid says as he kicks her hard.

Eden whimpers. Sid then leaves the room door slamming behind him. Eden still had her cell phone. It took everything in her to dial his number.

"Hey Princess." Chase says answering on the first ring.

"Chase help. I am hurt." Eden says.

"Eden? Where are you?" Chase asks panicked.

"Hotel Chase. Hurry." Eden says before she blacked out.

"Hang tight princess. I am coming to get you." Chase says.

You ever love somebody so much

You can barely breathe, when you're with them, you meet

And neither one of you, even know what hit 'em

Got that warm fuzzy feeling, yeah them chills, used to get 'em

Now you're getting fucking sick, of looking at 'em

You swore you've never hit 'em, never do nothing to hurt 'em

Now you're in each other's face,

Spewing venom in your words, when you spit 'em

You push, pull each other's hair, scratch, claw, bit 'em

Throw 'em down, pin 'em, so lost in the moments, when you're in 'em

It's the rage that took over it controls you both

So they say it's best, to go your separate ways

Guess that they don't know ya 'cause today, that was yesterday

Yesterday is over, it's a different day

Sound like broken records, playin' over, but you promised her

Next time you'll show restraint

You don't get another chance

Life is no Nintendo game, but you lied again

Now you get to watch her leave

Out the window, guess that's why they call it window pane

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn

But that's alright, because I like the way it hurts

Just gonna stand there and hear me cry

But that's alright, because I love the way you lie

I love the way you lie

I love the way you lie

[rhiezus]

Special Q&A with Moon Nayoung.

now that you’re not an actress anymore, the world is dying to know: what is moon nayoung doing?

what a pesky devil of you. it’s not like i��m very busy but it’s not i want to be busy, so eating well, sleeping well, travelling, picking different hobbies, spending a lot of time on youtube. i’m unemployed, but gladly.

do you ever plan on acting again?

noo, i loved acting but that phase of my life is over. i am ready to be myself and no else for quite some time. i encourage acting though, it’s an exercise and it was an experience.

we saw your cat a lot on your social media, what’s is their name?

oh, when we started this i was crossing my fingers thinking: please talk about my cats. in all forms expect physical, i’m a cat. so i found manwol in a shelter, she looked me in the eye suspiciously and i thought “she is testing me”, so i took her home to complete her task. she is always watching me, i don’t know if like a affectionate way, however she is very jealous of the people around me and for that reason i think we identify with each other. i don’t remember my boyfriend’s cat names though, he has many and they just keep adding, i just call them what i feel like calling them and they always answer, it’s like an unspoken connection.

when are you and keun getting married though?

it’s that a thing you’d like to see? think we should live it for the world and charge a few to enter the livestream?

what’s the most used app on your phone?

it’s between my yoga app, subway surfaces and piano tiles. people often underestimate how good i am with phone games, not that i am bragging but i’ve had years of boredom and that adds to the experience.

we heard you like cooking, what’s your favorite dish to cook right now?

my favorite thing to cook... is spaghetti, there is like a hundred ways to do them differently and i love noodles. garlicky spaghetti, vegetable spaghetti, crock-pot spaghetti, the famous carbonara... there is baked spaghetti, it’s one of my favorites, chicken spaghetti, there is even a million dollar spaghetti that’s great and super easy. but last week i aced the tagine, it’s from maroccos. fun fact is most people think the word tagine is the meal itself but tagine is actually the cookware used to cook the meal. the reason for using a tagine is to make a dish tender and bring out its natural flavors. 

what’s the place you want to travel the most?

i would love to go somewhere on the american continent, because their food is rich and it’s very different from asia but at the same time i don’t like travelling for long periods and spending too much time on a plane. i would like to see mexico or argentina, maybe even cuba too. 

which of your friends are you most proud of? and why?

i don’t have that many friends, it’s not that hard to choose between them. the one that most accomplished things this year was bonghu, but that’s mainly because she got pregnant and i admire her nerve. she is a great friend, mom, person, woman and all in general so that makes me proud. 

what’s the song you sing along when you hear it?

ring ring.

who is the last person you texted? and what as the text about?

it was my friend group, i send a bear emoji with a blinking heart. i can’t recall what was the conversation about, it just called for a cute bear emoji.

how is your morning routine? 

i wake up, look into my phone for like fifteen minutes to an hour (there is no in-between), i go pee and take a shower, do my skincare, feed the cats, cook breakfast, eat breakfast, go jogging or hit the gym. now in quarantine i would do yoga at home, but since it’s better now i just go jogging again. and that takes about my whole morning.

who was your first celebrity crush?

i think it was patrick swayze, but also harrison ford. 

what’s on your mind like right now?

this. i mean? what else? i don’t know. 

what do you spent way too much money on?

masterclass online classes! i find it so interesting even though i know i don’t have the vocation of being a professional in that area, i mean... it’s just so great. i started paying for gordon ramsey’s classes, because i love that man but now i think i’ve even seen natalie portamn, anna wintour and even usher’s classes. 

what’s the most cringy worthy thing you’ve seen someone post on social media?

i’m not one to judge cause all i have are cats and food, and that’s the most cringy worthy you can ever get on social media but i hate when people do this long captions like, no one is gonna read it and they know it but they just do that too sound smart and meaningful. i mean there’s nothing you can really say that can’t be said in private, right? i don’t know.

what was the last show you binge-watched?

finished you a few days ago, don’t know if it was worth it, but i did it anyways. there was stranger too, season two was very well done.

what is your favorite item of clothing?

my favorite item of clothing? hm, i think is black high waist pants because one) it’s comfy. two) it’s cheap. 3) it goes with anything in your wardrobe. 4) and with any weather or mood.  

what are you passionate about?

i think... i’m passionate about just living, i mean. focusing on the present feeling and go from there, you know?! no need to be anxious about things you can’t see, while being responsible about the things you do right now and just work with that, like, make your lemonades. 

what’s the best part of your 20′s? what are you taking from this age?

hm. there is a lot of figuring out, from yourself and from others, nothing is certain and everything is fragile but also soothing and exciting. like there is many things i wanna do but also i don’t feel like doing, it’s a contradictory age that’s just hard to understand. i was not one to feel nostalgic or regret things, but as you get older you start to do that and you have to remind yourself that is a way to learn and be better. so for me, the best part is truly looking at yourself differently everyday, changing is inevitable so you have to keep remembering who you are and what you stand for in order to keep going. i hope that i am taking a better person from this. also make good friends, that’s probably the best advice and best part of your 20′s.

who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

i don’t have many deep conversations, i am more the type that listens. but when i do it’s just thoughts, like now in this interview. so probably my last deep conversation is this, because you’re asking me things that are hard not to be deep about.

best advice you received from someone.

advice’s can be fragile and change from time to time, so the only one i think is right is about being kind to others, that sounds basic but that’s because it’s suppose to be. 

what’s the one food you can’t bring yourself to eat?

funny enough, i don’t like egg. like fried egg, i mean if it’s in the food and as an ingredient, i don’t really mind but as a meal itself... i don’t really like it. i don’t care for tofu either, i can eat it though.

if you were in a band, what kind of music would you play?

i would go for r&b but it would become popular quick so i’d have to make it pop but with still a little r&b vibe, know what i mean? but i can’t really sing, or play any instrument.

if it would have a movie about your life, what would be the title?

did you listen to folklore, the taylor swift album? i came across mad woman, and i really like that song, i think something like that... it doesn’t need to be something big and meaningful, just moon nayoung it’s fine. but i don’t want a movie about my life, there is many other important stories to tell.

do you believe in astrology? 

i don’t really have an opinion. i’m a sagittarius, who are suppose to be really free spirits, curious and idealistic, which i don’t know if it’s me or not. so i think is funny but i don’t really care.

do you consider yourself romantic? what’s the most romantic gesture you have done?

me? i don’t know. i don’t think i do things in name of romance, i do them because i want to. that sounds sooo bitter, but i swear it’s not! i may be a romantic though, but i am not hopeless, at least not anymore. cooking for your partner counts as big romantic gesture? cause i’ve done that a lot.

what was your favorite book as a child?

peter pan and little women. i probably didn’t wanna grew up, right?!

do you prefer baths or showers?

i like both, but i prefer showers because it takes less time and it’s more practical. cold showers in the summer all the way.

tell something you learn that you wish more people would too.

pay your bills before due date, mark them on your calendar or something and try to pay them before it’s due. even if it leave you broke for a few days, if you take your time it will only make you more lazy and it will become a habit. 

now leave us with a secret that no one knows about you.

there is not much people don’t know about me anymore and if there is, that’s the reason why it’s a secret, am i right? but maybe i call tell you that i already cheated on a text or something, cause that’s all i have for you. sorry.

[leebrontide]

A true, 30 year, tropetastic, queer love story. (Part 1)

Pls open the link if you'd like to read a 30 year, trope-tastic true queer romance featuring pining, instalove, swords, childhood-friends-to-lovers and a happy ending.

We THINK the story begins in 1991. We know it starts at theatre day-camp for kids, a summer when we were both in elementary school.

The earliest memories are vague- I remembered a super cool kid from the older class with dark eyes who I was desperate to eat lunch with every day.

It's taken us years to reconstruct the timeline. We have figured out I did go to her house outside of camp that first year, because I remember her bird that tried to bite me. We can only guess at years based on camp themes.

Because we were little kids. I was 7. So we lost touch.

But here's the thing- we kept going to the same camp. She was always in a class ahead of me, because I'm a year and a half younger.

And every year- apparently without remembering we'd met before? We became summer best friends. Drawn together over and over.

But, being disorganized kids in a world of lesser tech, every year, when camp ended, we lost phone numbers- we lived a good 30 minutes away from each other, so I have to imagine our parent's weren't exactly heartbroken at the loss. It was a lot of driving.

In 4th grade, when I was 9, I made a new best friend, named Meredith. My parents heartily recommended the summer theatre camp to hers, and she was sent with me, the next year.

She, was older than me, so she was in Ty's class. & having excellent taste, also made friends with her.

The three of us played together all summer.

Then came the fall, and the inevitable lost contact. I remember being sad about that much more clearly, that year.

BUT, the big change happened when I was 10.

Again, sent to camp. Again, my friend Meredith was there to.

At lunch, I found them playing together. I went to introduce myself to the obviously cool older girl.

For some reason I tried to shake her hand? Little weirdo.

Ty reacts to me the same way- oh hey! Cool new person! I want to be friends!

Meredith looks at us both like we're out of our minds.

"You know each other. We played all last summer."

And suddenly, the spell of childhood amnesia was broken.

I DID know her. We were FRIENDS.

We HAD BEEN FRIENDS for years.

She LIKED ME.

SHE LIKED ME.

(love with memory disabilities is a trip, folks. And her lil ADHD kid brain was struggling right alongside mine)

We were elated.

But that wasn't the last shock to my little 10 year old heart that 5 week summer camp would bring.

Meredith was, and is, a poet. Somehow she had a habit, at 11 years old, of making up poems about people's eyes.

Weird stuff. I remember a pair of green eyes being compared to a deep sea, were the bones of drunken drowned sailors floated.

Very Anne of Green Gables.

And- I remember this part with perfect clarity. She turned to me and said, do you know who has pretty eyes? Ty.

We were crossing the stage, Ty was carrying a box of props like 15 feet ahead of us.

I said "does she?"

And then, ever the romantic I screamed "HEY TY TURN AROUND I WANNA SEE SOMETHING!"

She did.

And for the first time, I looked into the dark eyes I'd been drawn to for all those years, and saw them anew.

There's a reason cupid's supposed to have arrows.

I swear to you that this is true. It felt like an actual blow to my chest. Like a physical blow.

I was stunned. My little heart was hammering out of control.

I have no idea what I said, or did, or looked like after that.

But I figured out pretty quickly what that was. It was not subtle, even to a prepubescent nearly 6th grader.

But I was a pragmatic little almost-6th-grader.

This was a crush. Middle schoolers have crushes.

And they're supposed to fade over time.

I don't remember if I was worried that my crush was on a girl. I just remember the certainty that this was just a child's crush, and therefor nothing that would last or cause problems.

And when fall came, I lost her number again.

But this time I was devastated.

But, this time a hero saved the day! Meredith, sweet, wonderful, more-organized-than-either-of-us Meredith, still had the number.

And this time, I held on to it.

We became year round besties.

For the first year of adoring her year-round, I didn't worry about my little crush. It'd go away in time.

By 7th grade, it started to be a problem.

We were having sleep overs, and I started to feel guilty about how much I wanted to look at her and cuddle her all the time.

I don't think I told anyone right away. But Meredith was always the smartest of us three.

She's the one who proposed we play "wedding". She presided over the ceremony herself, and her little sister was our wedding photographer.

Oddly, even though I didn't know about this photo till years later, this is a game both of us remember playing.

It meant... something.

Image

I started to feel guilty. We were having sleep overs, talking every day on the phone. I wanted to look at her all the time- I wanted to be with her all the time. I wanted to kiss her, and started to realize she might be bothered by that.

I never wanted to hide anything from her.

So, I confessed my love. I didn't think of this as being especially radical or brave, but in retrospect, I'm impressed by 12 year old Lee's behavior.

She smiled brightly, and said she loved me to!

As her best friend.

I clarified my position.

She repeated that she loved me as her very best friend.

And these feelings were a bit scary and BIG, so that was all good. She still wanted to hang out all the time. Life was good.

By 8th grade, I was starting to worry. The crush hadn't worn off yet. Everyone told me these things wore off.

But I was more in love with her than ever.

And when Meredith moved to Nashville, we got even closer.

We joined the MN sword club. Made new friends. In the way of these things, a whole lot of them turned out to be some evolving variety of queer. Friends started coming out.

I barely needed to, my crush was horrifyingly obvious to all our friends.

Image

I promised you swords. The swords don't feature prominently, but the club was a major connection for us for years, and this detail has always struck me.

I'm not an especially good fencer. Especially then. I was constructed out of raw spaghetti noodles and moved like creaky budget claymation most of the time. I was calculating, but slow.

She was fast, and brash, and more skilled than me. She eventually beat some nationally recognized fencers. We called her "fiery Tybalt" because we're a bunch of big ol nerds who wanted to sound smart. She eventually took her name from that nickname.

Even at only 5ft tall, she should have beaten me handily and reliably. She could hold her own against much better fencers.

But we actually got BANNED from sparring together, because we were so evenly matched we could never get enough points for a win.

My one and only expertise in fencing was knowing her. But she knew me just as well, so there was a stalemate.

Our friends laughed at us.

I confessed my love again in 8th grade.

And 9th.

10th.

11th.

I never wanted to lie to her. It was important to me that she knew what I was thinking and feeling, but it was also important that I not burden her with it.

She always gave me the same answer. She loved me. She loved me SO MUCH.

What a shame she was straight.

Now, readers, let me remind you we're looking at two queer kids in the 90s at this point.

There were pressures at play.

When I was in 11th grade, she left for college. And she was far enough away that long distance calls were expensive. I couldn't call her every day.

What I remember most about senior year was being depressed and lonely.

But also, that after years of my family despairing of my ever learning to type, and eventually getting me the (then very expensive) dragon speech-to-type program so I could type my homework and not fail school- my contact with her was suddenly all in text. AOL messenger.

People have commented at all my workplaces about my typing speed. I type 120 words per minute now.

Specifically because it was the only way to talk to her most days.

I went to college the following year. We both got boyfriends. Both nice boys who liked and admired us.

BOTH broke up with us because we so obviously preferred each other over them. To an embarrassing degree.

The boy I was dating- bless him he only lasted 3 months- specifically told me "if I go out with you any more I'm going to fall in love with you. And you're in love with her."

Slick bastard.

He was right tho.

I couldn't be mad at him.

But this is when I started to really panic.

It'd been 6 years. My first crush was still absolutely roaring. Nobody else came close to tempting me.

And nobody else wanted to, when it became obvious they couldn't compete with her.

And she was still my best friend, so of course I told her. I told her I was miserable, because I was going to be single forever because nobody else would want me, because I was so in love with her.

She felt bad. She loved me so much. So much she'd been dumped to.

Such a shame she was straight.

I wouldn't find out till much later that that conversation had started something on her side, that, for once, she knew to keep from me.

She spent the next 6 months in intense contemplation.

She DID prefer me to all the other boys (and girls) who were chasing her in college.

And there were a lot of them.

She did think I was pretty, and she did love me. And she did want to be with me forever.

She'd been as dedicated to me as I was to her through this whole time. As caring, as invested, as, frankly, obsessed. Everyone could see it.

But she wasn't straight. She was bi.

And ace.

We wouldn't learn that word for many more years. All she knew was that the story of falling in love didn't match the love she was feeling.

But then she realized- she'd never felt the feelings she was "supposed" to feel for her boyfriend, either. She was not more attracted to him than to me. And he was a good looking guy. A catch by most any standard.

And she also hadn't loved him.

But she did love me.

So, my sophomore year of college (her junior year), we were preparing our trip to the Renaissance festival. A bunch of her friends were driving into town for it, and we'd see each other again at last. (we'd been back at school like 2 weeks, so naturally were desperate to meet up)

I am still flabbergasted as the next series of events.

She asked me out. On AOL instant messenger. After over 7 years of my pining, and adoration. After 7 years of choosing the pain of being near her and not being able to kiss her, over the desolation of not having her beside me

She very logically explained her reasoning.

I had a meltdown.

My poor room mate walked into our room to find me crying and throwing things at the computer screen.

I was convinced she was offering to date me because she felt bad for me. Because she loved me and wanted me to stop hurting and feeling alone.

So I turned her down.

That, friends, was HARD. REALLY HARD.

Thankfully, she was having none of it. She insisted it only made sense for us to date. I tried to stay firm. I refused repeatedly, all in that damned AOL messenger.

We reached a compromise- one date, at the Ren Fest, as a test.

And if it failed we'd never speak of it again.

Because the prospect of dating and breaking up was terrifying to us both.

If we were going to be together, we'd be defacto engaged. Neither of us could tolerate breaking up.

The weekend came- my college friends all knew, and accompanied me, made sure I was decked out in the best fair garb we could cobble together.

She drove up with her friends- including the ex- who had no idea what was happening. She had on her finest cape & boots & a swishy dress.

We could not manage to be alone together. Like it was a proper rom-com ridiculousness. All damn day.

But at least we were together.

She came back to my dorm that night, to spend the night, and drive back the next day.

Shout out to my room mate who stayed at her boyfriend's house that night. Love you, Lindsay.

We finally managed to kiss.

She abruptly decided kissing wasn't some weird thing people only pretended to like because it was normal, and was in fact an amazing wonderful thing we should do frequently.

I don't actually remember us deciding that the experiment was successful, and we'd be a romantic couple from then on.

Pretty sure the kissing melted my brain.

It was not like kissing my old boyfriend at all.

She went back to college the next day.

I do remember, that, MORE THAN ONCE, I nervously asked my roomy if this had all really happened. I was truly and genuinely concerned that I'd dreamed or fantasized the whole thing. I'd done both enough times before.

I couldn't just ask outright so I'd say something like. "Hey did anything- important happen yesterday?"

And she'd look at me like I was speaking some alien language, and tell me I was dating Ty now.

I wandered around in a dream-like stupor for a WEEK.

This is a good place to stop for now. More tonight. I need to go snuggle my baby and help my wife with lunch. 💖

Popping in briefly for the next installment.

All our friends knew immediately. Some of them- the newer ones, were confused because they had assumed we were always dating, on account of how blatantly in love we were all the damn time.

We decided tho, to hold off on telling our families. We decided to date a year first, to show that it was serious, and that we meant it.

It was a good year, full of the kind of pining that is regularly rewarded by happy weekends and spring breaks and summers.

The next august, before we went back to school, we each sat down our own parents. Hers were sort of "yeah ok whatever." I was not there for that conversation.

I went to my favorite restaurant with my own parents, and told them I was seeing someone. Dad was enthused. Wanted to meet him.

Well. I said. You have.

Because it's Ty.

[najoah]

First Chance [Chapter 5]

Jay fumbled on his phone, trying to connect it to the car’s sound system. He was dressed in his own clothes now – a white oversized tee, wide-legged jeans and the leather jacket I gifted him a few years ago. Despite the long, overdrawn interview, no trace of fatigue graced his face.

“Joah, listen to this track.” Buzzing with excitement, he turned up the volume. A soft, R&B melody fills the car as I pulled out of the parking lot. Shivers ran down my spine as I listen to the music closely, remembering the time he told me how he wished he was doing R&B instead of the kitschy, pop songs GOT7 were releasing. I smiled at the thought. “Remember how embarrassed you were when I heard Just Right the first time?”

He groaned in agony next to me. “Fuck, why you got to bring that up?”

I laughed. As we pulled up into the highway, I listened closer to the song. Then I noticed the words he was singing along to, and I felt my cheeks turning red. “The lyrics… are something.”

“No longer a JYPE baby,” he said proudly, his right hand beating his chest.

As the night grows deep, girl I know what you want You want me inside You want me inside Girl tonight's special because of you, girl Just give me what I want Want me inside Want me inside

“Really? Want me inside?” I moaned in disgust. “I can’t listen to this anymore.”

“Why? Why not?” He watched as I turned the music off. “Why can’t you appreciate a good song?”

“A good song doesn’t have to be about sex. Also,” I continued, trying to change the subject. The thought of Jay B having sex is not only scarring to imagine but also violates professional boundaries I’ve drawn between us. “What are we having for dinner? Are we ordering in or should I stop by somewhere and pick up something to eat?”

Jay’s hand reached out to touch the ends of my hair. Twirling it between his fingers, he asked, “Honestly, I’m a little surprised that you agreed to come over so fast. Joah, do you have a crush on me?”

“Please,” I said sarcastically. I pulled down the visor of the passenger seat. “Please take a look at yourself in the mirror and tell me which part of you is really worth fawning over.” He released his fingers my hair and leaned in to admire himself in the mirror. “I see a really good-looking man. So, all parts of me are worth fawning over, no?”

I dismissed his pretentious comment. “Can you please let me know what you want to eat? Or else, I’m driving myself home.”

“Actually,” he said as he folds the visor to a close. “I want some of your fried rice. You know, the Malaysian fried rice that you used to make? You haven’t made me some in a while.”

Back in the early days of GOT7, Bambam and I took turns educating the boys on different delicacies of Southeast Asian Food. Bambam proved to be the better cook – but that may be because Thai cuisine had always been superior to Malaysian. But the boys loved my rendition of a typical Malaysian fried rice. Especially Jay, who would insist on having the dish the night of every GOT7’s comeback.

“You know the one you used to make? The Malaysian fried rice?”

I nodded. “So, my punishment is slaving over the stove for you?”

He smiled. “Yeah, and your undivided attention.”

I frowned sarcastically at his remark. “You know, if you say those things to other girls, they’ll think you’re flirting with them.”

“But not to you, right? You’d never think it of me flirting with you, right?” It wasn’t the question that took me by surprise but the hint of sorrow in his tone.

“Yes, because you’re my client.”

______________________________________________________

The Southeast Asian market was quiet, except for a few customers who were strolling the different aisles occupied in their own thoughts. Jay had wanted to come along but I refused. Despite the market being the least likely place to spot a former GOT7 member, I didn’t want to take my chances. We have been “caught” by fans way too many times to be reckless about it now. JYPE had been quite understanding about our dynamic, but I’m not entirely sure how Higher Music were to react should news come out of Jay and his coordi, hitting the market late at night.  

I looked over the items in the basket, ticking off the ingredients I need to purchase for dinner.

Belacan. Anchovies. Sweet soy sauce. Fried onions.

Eggs. I need eggs. Does Jay have any eggs at his place? Placing the basket on the floor, I texted Jay to inquire the status of his pantry.

He replied with: It is as empty and cold as your heart.

Of course. So, eggs. Carrots. Onions. I made my way over to the fresh ingredients section of the market when I passed by the instant noodles’ aisle. Might as well pick up some of Jay’s favorite Indomee Goreng. And the latest snack craze in Korea, Super Ring, that Jay have yet to try himself.

The bill came to a whopping KRW300,000 won, which I wasn’t surprised by given that I’m filling Jay’s pantry with a month’s worth of food. As I placed the items into the two tote bags I brought along, a hand reached out to help.  

I turned to thank who I assumed to be one of the store attendants only to find Kyu, smiling at me. “Wow, twice in one day. That’s a new record.”

Stifling the audible shock coming up in my throat, I took a step back. Instinctively, I reached out to grab the onions he was holding. “I got this,” I said, my voice surprisingly calm – unlike the emotions I was feeling inside.

“This is a lot of stuff,” Kyu commented, “cooking a feast or something?”

I looked to his forehead, resisting the pair of browns that I’ve melted into for the past decade. “Just some things for the month. This market is really far from where I live,” said I, indifferently. Or at least I hoped that it came across that way.

“Where is that?”

My eyes fell into his. “Where is what?”

“Where do you live?”

“Why?” I snapped. “Why does it matter to you?”

“Because I’ve been trying to reach you for three years.” His tone was exasperated. Brows furrowed, nose flaring. He was angry. “I know you’ve been avoiding me. Don’t tell me otherwise because I can see it. How much you want to run away from me. How uncomfortable I make you feel.”

Placing the last item into the bag, I diverted my gaze. “I have to go.”

I rushed to the exit with hastened steps, but Kyu followed, calling my name between his lips. We were in the parking lot when his hand, grasped my wrist for the second time today. “Ahna, look at me.”

“Let me go.” Desperately, I tried to wring my wrist away from his touch but the two bags on my shoulders consumed all the strength I have. “Kyu, let me go!”

“Not until you tell me what I’ve done to make you hate me.” His grip tightened around my wrist.

“Let me go, please,” I pleaded, tears brimming my eyes. “Please, Kyu, please.”

“She said let go.”

Jay stood between the two us, his hand on the same wrist Kyu was holding. Eyes locked onto Kyu’s, he swiftly pulled my wrist away before dragging me behind him. “Anything you want to say to her, you have to say through me,” Jay gritted through his teeth, tone menacing.

“Jay, stop.” Holding his hand, I stepped back between the two.  I looked to Kyu whose face was riddled with questions. “Kyu, I’ll text you. Give me some time and I’ll reach out to you.”

Kyu turned his eyes to me, his face softening. “Okay, I’ll wait for your call.” Kyu turned and walked away. The two of us stood in silence, watching Kyu disappearing back into the market.

Jay places his hand around mine and pulled me towards the car. “Who the fuck is that?” Anger was still lacing his tone, but somehow, I found it to be comforting.

“He’s no one.”

“Joah, he’s not fucking nothing.” We were by the car when he turned to face me. Seeing the two bags I was carrying on my shoulders, his demeanor immediately softened. Taking the bags into his hands, he whispered, “Don’t tell me it’s nothing, Joah.”

I, myself, was not ready to come to terms to what has transpired between us. Talking about it with Jay is simply not an option I can take.

“Let’s not talk about this anymore, please.”

“Jay, I think I’m going to go back home. Can I cook for you some other time?” I could feel the tears welling up behind my eyes. “I’ll drop you home, okay?”

He lets out a huge sigh of defeat upon seeing the look on my face. Pulling my hand in his to his lips, he whispers, “I’ll drive you home.”

[bigbrotherlouis]

the bag of chips scene from 'i ate you up the day we first spoke' for the director's cut meme!

whoohoo i actually loved writing this scene and i’m so glad someone asked about it yeeee

(director’s cut meme)

everything eases back into normal. tk picks nolan up for practice, because nolan’s car is inexplicably always out of gas, (this is true, i read an article about it somewhere) and ties nolan’s ties for him on game days, and follows him into his living room to eat all the good snacks nolan hides on increasingly higher shelves.

“how did you even get those?” he asks when he comes out of the washroom and finds travis eating illegal all-dressed his mom had sent down in his last care package. he’s pretty sure they were hidden, like, on top of the cupboards this time. he literally had to throw them up there. (food, when you move countries, is a really big deal. i always want to keep the mutlicultural aspect of a lot of hockey players in mind, because i was a young multicutural person in the united states, and home foods is usually a good way to do it. all-dressed are pretty distinctly canadian, and my cousin gets her parents to send them to her in california, so i borrowed that from her. also i liked the image of TK climbing on the counters to try and get at a bag of chips.)

tk shrugs and crams a handful of chips into his mouth. “smart thinking.”

“those are mine.”

“i don’t see you eating them,” tk says smugly and nolan thinks about it for precisely point two seconds before he launches himself at the sofa. (no thoughts, head empty)

it’s a familiar ritual, this one. tk cackles, going limp so he can noodle off the cushions onto the floor, the bag still clamped in his hand. he scrabbles backwards until he’s out of reach of nolan’s admittedly long arms.

“sucks to suck, babe,” he gloats, except nolan is not emphatically giving up, those are his chips, and he’s not going to let his idiot of a best friend eat them all. tk grunts when nolan lands on his lower half, hard, and pins down his legs so he can’t escape. he sits on tk’s knees and ignores the yelling. (travis “has never shut up once in his life” konecny strikes again)

“mine,” he says savagely, snatching the bag out of his hands. tk huffs, shoving at his legs.

“it’s rude— not to— share— fuck, patty, what are you doing in the gym?”

“some of us don’t skip leg day.”

“yeah, well, some of us aren’t built like a fuckin’ ox,” tk complains, as if he’s not just as in shape as nolan is. “i can’t even fuckin’ pinch you because you’re wearing jeans.”

“now who’s the smart think—  fuck!” (not you, pat. not tk either but still not you.) he shouts, flinching and rubbing at his side. that pinch is definitely going to bruise. tk uses it as a distraction to roll them, nolan’s shoulders thudding painfully against the floor, and straddles nolan’s stomach with his thighs. there’s another struggle but tk gets hold of nolan’s arms, pins them under his knees so nolan’s fists are at his sides. he’s effectively trapped. (too many nolans but what do you do when writing m/m. also this isn’t specific to this scene, but especially in hockey with all its nicknames, i like to write people’s internal narrative with whatever name they probably think of themselves as. that’s why nolan isn’t pat/patty here, and why tk is usually not travis)

“still me,” tk says, grinning at him with undisguised glee. he works the chips free and sits up, putting his weight just under nolan’s ribs so all the breath gets knocked out of him for a second.

“fucker,” nolan hisses, trying and failing to wriggle his way out. “what the fuck, teeks?”

“that’s what you get for not growing up with brothers, bro. gotta fight to survive. survival skills.”

“bud, you don’t even know. sisters have nails and they’re not fucking afraid to use them,” nolan says, his best murder glare in effect. he probably still has the scars in some places. (i know i do) tk snorts.

“sorry, i don’t see you scratching me here,” he says.  

“let me go and i’ll scratch you up real good,” he threatens and then his brain catches up with his mouth, his face going red as he realises what he’s maybe implied. “uh.”

tk doesn’t take the obvious chirp, just raises an eyebrow. there’s a considering look on his face, one that makes nolan want to squirm more and it settles somewhere down deep in his stomach. (so i wrote this scene because i needed a turn for both of them, relationship-wise. iirc, there’s been a few places where tk’s interest might be noticeable, but nothing super concrete for pat or for the reader. meanwhile, on tk’s side, he needed clear signals that pat’s into him before he tries to tell him again.)

“uh,” he says again because his brain is just fucking offline and his arms are still locked under travis’ legs and travis burns hot because nolan can feel it against his skin, through his t-shirt, and this is all going to get incredibly, incredibly awkward in about three seconds. (unfortunately, i love a good run-on sentence to build tension) he’s pretty sure popping a boner because a teammate is sitting on you is, like, not something you can get away with by laughing.

tk shifts, sitting up the tiniest bit, and reaches out the hand that’s not currently occupied with the fuckin’ chips— probably all crushed to hell now, anyway (foreshadowing!! also strategic last mention here so we know that tk is still holding them, and then they aren’t mentioned until the shoe drops for optimal dramatic effect) — and brushes his fingers against nolan’s cheek. he traces the blush from his cheekbone carefully down his neck, pausing to thumb at his jaw, and then bumps his fingers against his collar, where it disappears down into his shirt. (i really liked building the tension here. also this is fully just projection bc i would love to touch patty’s blush once in my life)

“you’re glowing, pat,” he says, so soft, and it makes nolan go redder. he glowers at a spot by tk’s ear, unwilling to look him in the face and see whatever is written there. (would tk actually tell nolan he’s glowing? probably not, but fictionally it gives the reader a good picture of what nolan looks like to someone else. i didn’t want to overuse red-- which didn’t quite feel like a strong enough word-- or blush, so glowing it was.) tk hooks his index into the collar and there’s a moment when nolan thinks he’s going to pull it down, see if his blush goes all the way down his chest— it does, if he’s embarrassed enough. it’s fucking terrible— and he turns his head away, dragging in a breath through his nose. he’s, like, so incredibly fucked that he can’t even think about it without going dizzy. (you’ll probably see this a lot if you look for it in my writing, but i like to add in a “like” or something similarly bro-ish when things get particularly emotionally fraught, to keep it more realistic. also i think it’s funny. anyway, i like the contrast of tk not being able to take his eyes away from something he wanted and nolan not being able to look at it. characterisation, wahey!) it’s better to just not look.

of course, it’s the exact opposite of what tk wants.

“hey,” he says. “look at me.”

nolan refuses, a muscle ticking in his jaw. (this is hot to me idc) tk lets go of his collar to pull on his hair instead, just a little tug of a piece by his ear, and nolan can’t quite bite back the punched-out sound that he lets out. (also hot.)

“look at me,” tk says again, an edge to his voice, and nolan does. tk won’t stop until he does, he knows that well enough. (another look at their dynamic and how well they know each other) he lifts his chin, just a tiny bit, because he’s not going to do anything without a fight. tk’s hand tightens in his hair and it keeps him in place, nailed— ha— to the floor. (i write for the people whose brains make inappropriate jokes at the wrong moments) he couldn’t move if he wanted to, watches helplessly as tk leans down.

the hope in his chest is so thick, nolan thinks it might actually smother him, stop his heart. he’s breathing fast and shallow, almost on the verge of panting, and jesus fuck, isn’t that embarrassing. he’s so desperate, he could squirm with it and he briefly remembers travis months ago, writhing on his very rug and how much nolan wanted to help. he can smell snow again, sharp in the back of his nose. (this does the double work of calling back to an earlier scene-- ya girl loves a good callback-- and also building the anticipation some more. the snow reference reminds the reader that this is still a werewolf au, even in the midst of this. also, once when i was like fifteen, i read something about how to write kisses/romance and it talked about picking one or two aspects of the kiss to focus on-- breathing, hands, the feeling of someone’s mouth, etc. i still use that advice.)

tk shifts his weight and nolan has enough time to think holy fuck, is this happening? before travis fucking konecny upends the bag of all dressed-flavoured crumbs all over his face. (OKAY a lot going on here! it’s one of my favourite moments, really. first of all, here’s the resolution of all the chips talk! sure, i could’ve just abandoned them, but the subverting of expectations was a lot more fun and the story still wasn’t quite ready for them to kiss yet. second, this is tk chickening out. he had two choices and he chose violence. or, like, the buddies option, which is amusing to me because this is not buddies, boys. finally, the full name was necessary to convey nolan’s disappointment and anger, as was the full description of the chips. nolan is upset, and he’s going to notice these things, and that shows up in his internal narrative.)

“got ‘em,” he crows over nolan’s sputtering, letting himself get bucked off onto the floor. nolan wipes furiously at his face, all his feelings a confusing mix of horny and angry and confused, all with the thick overtone of humiliation.

“you’re a fucking dick,” he says and it’s flat, but tk is gloating too much to care. (he’s not, he’s trying to cover, but nolan’s too embarrassed to realise)

“you should’ve seen your face, pat.”

nolan glares daggers at the carpet, the chips spread out everywhere. it’s going to be a bitch to clean up. tk had better help. (makes sure the punch landed, and to give a final resolution.)

he leans against the sofa and waits for tk to tire himself out, listening to the laughter and trying not to get too angry or, like, cry. his neck feels hot, prickling uneasily. he rubs at it with his hand, startles when tk kicks him gently in the ankle. (in order for tk to not come out of this looking like an asshole, i needed him to make up his obliviousness by being observant in other times. and in order for tk to notice patty being mad, i needed to give patty actions that could be noticed, like not laughing along with the joke)

“sorry if i made you mad,” tk says quietly, all the giggles finally worked out of him. “you looked tense (no shit bud) and i thought it would make you laugh.”

it’s not tk’s fault nolan thought he was gonna, like, kiss him. (”like” again, to break up a too-honest moment) it was a dick move but tk doesn't have a cruel bone in his body, so: “it’s fine,” he mumbles and shrugs his shoulder. “it was funny.”

tk preens for a second. “i know.”

“you owe me a bag now.”

“i’ll buy you a family-sized pack. i’m sure they’ll ship it down here, amazon or ups or somethin’.” (patty’s attempting to be normal and tk is attempting to make amends.)

nolan nods and scratches at his face, tipping his head against the couch cushions. (little motions like him scratching his face aren’t super necessary for like plot or development, but it helps humanize characters and i like to add them in whenever i can, as long as it’s not overkill. they can also be helpful in pointing to emotional state without directly saying it.) it’s quiet for a few seconds, just the sound of them breathing heavier than usual, and it would be so normal. should be normal, by all counts, but nolan still kind of wants to crawl into a hole for while. wants to push tk out of the apartment and eat ice cream and google ‘how to stop a crush,’ like his sisters used to do when they were upset. he’s already googled it, a few days ago, and there was nothing but maybe someone’s offered good advice since then. (people make an impact on you, and family even more so, and i always like reminders of how close nolan seems to be with his sisters. also, it’s funny.)

tk flicks him on the wrist. (this is something that tk does consistently through the story, and even though it’s not super important to this scene, it establishes a behaviour in the larger story. that’s important too!)

“pat,” he says and it sounds it’s not the first time. nolan blinks.

“yeah?”

“i just asked you if you were hungry.”

“oh. uh. no, not really,” he answers truthfully. tk wrinkles his nose.

“do you, like, have anything in your fridge to eat?”

“mm, probably not.”

“typical,” tk mutters under his breath, as if he ever has anything regularly stocked besides protein powder and bacon. (protein rich foods that are easy to eat after a full moon, or after a workout) at least nolan has eggs pretty consistently. (also a protein rich food that’s less easy to eat after a full moon, but are easy to make when you aren’t a werewolf) “wanna go get sushi?”

nolan thinks about it. shoves his sweaty hair behind his ear and considers going out to their favourite place and pretending he’s not still fucking mortified. and, like, a little turned on. it makes him nauseous. (i get such physical reactions to emotional things that i write everyone into having them) 

“no,” he says. he’s not facing tk but he can still see him deflate, his shoulders hunching over. “i don’t— no.”

“okay. that’s… okay.”

“i think i’m getting a migraine,” lies nolan. “think i’m just gonna lay down.”

“do you need me to stay with you? keep you company?”

nolan’s shaking his head before tk even finishes the thought. “no, trav. i’m fine, i promise.” (the trav here works as a signal that something isn’t right! it’s why tk looks at him for so long in the next line.)

tk studies him for a long minute, his eyes searching the side of patty’s face presented to him. nolan keeps his expression as blank as possible and stares hard at his feet.

“text me if you need anything,” he says finally, the words coming out slow and gentle. it’s a lot to handle. “i’ll come back.”

“i know. i will.” he won’t, but that’s not for tk to know. he doesn’t move when tk goes out the door, squeezes his eyes shut when the door doesn’t slam into its frame, (tk’s taking care of him, still!) and decides to leave the pile of crumbs to deal with later. (the climax of this scene happened a while ago so this is another little reminder of what happened, just so it’s solidified in the reader’s head after the longish comedown. i end scenes a LOT like this-- two actions, and then a callback-- because they’re simple and effective, and usually sound great!)  /fin

ahh thank you so much for asking!! this was really fun to, like, process through and remember my logic for! i was actually really nervous writing this scene, because i knew the tension and the break had to be PERFECT for it to land right. but i do like how it turned out so at least there’s that. ily!!

[in-class-daydreams]

Parlay (Kuroo x Reader) | Chapter 5

-Pairing: Kuroo Tetsurou x Reader (ft. Roommate Kenma)

Word Count: ~2,300

Genres: Fluff, angst if you squint, general buffoonery

CW: Some more swearing, secondhand embarrassment lol

Summary: (Y/N), a first-year student attending Tokyo U, is living with her best friend, Kozume Kenma. Little did she know, her life would be turned upside down after being exposed to Kenma’s volleyball teammate and close friend, Kuroo Tetsurou. One wrong move, and the parlay’s stakes only get higher each time.

Chapters: First | Previous | Next 

Grandmother had nearly given herself a stroke from agreeing so fast to (Y/N)’s request for a half shift that day.

“Is it for school? Is it for friends? Oh, (Y/N)-chan, is it for a man or a woman?” the old woman bombarded the girl she treated like a grandchild with questions. It was rare for (Y/N) to take a day off, much less request one. She shook her head.

“Nothing like that, Gran. My friends invited me to watch their volleyball game. Our school is very highly ranked.”

“Ah, your Tooru-kun plays on that team, doesn’t he?” (Y/N) watched as Grandmother cut a mango into slices and presented them on a bed of sticky rice. The young girl served the dish to a table by the window: a young father and his young daughter.

“The usual, for my favorite father-daughter duo!” she smiled sweetly at the pair. The father looked up from his computer.

“Thank you, (Y/N)-san. Look, Miki! What’s this?” he asked his 2-year-old. The little brown-haired girl looked away from the window to meet her father’s gaze. She had plump little rosy cheeks streaked with dried milk.

“Mangey!” she chirped. Before her father could react, the child had taken a fistful of mango and shoved it mostly into her mouth, though, the majority ended up on those round cheeks of hers. The man sighed, but not without a nonetheless adoring look at his daughter.

“I’m glad she likes it, “ (Y/N) giggled, “I’ll be back to check on you two in a few minutes, Suzuki-san.”

Making her way back to the kitchen, leaning against a side table covered in clean glass cups, (Y/N) took a moment to bask in the warm embrace of the place that felt like her true home. The kitchen was smaller than most tea houses of that size and of that popularity than the average place would normally have. Grandmother, however, made sure the place was immaculate. (Y/N) looked over the small plastic bins of ingredients, each one placed based first on health code requirements, then by frequency. Filling for songpyeon took up the largest bin. Continuing her conversation with Grandmother, she said, “Yes, Tooru is on that team,” she chuckled, “They practically begged him to play for them.” Grandmother dried her hands on a dish towel.

“Well, if you ever manage to pull him off the court, feel free to bring him around. That boy’s always neglected to eat,” the old woman griped.

Opening her mouth to reply, the ringing of the front door bell interrupted (Y/N)’s reply. With a quick swipe her hands over her apron, she swung out of the kitchen and greeted their new guests.

“Welcome in-- Oh! Hi, you two! Welcome in.” Before her stood her best friend and roommate and his tall, stressfully attractive childhood friend. Kenma’s dyed-blonde hair was mostly grown out - he’d been too busy (and too lazy) to get it redone. Kuroo’s catlike eyes crinkled as he smiled at her.

“Good morning, (Y/N)-san.”

“Hi, (Y/N).”

The female led the two boys over to a booth across from the kitchen entrance. Away from the volleyball players’ line of sight, the other three servers working today poked their heads out from the kitchen doorway. Chisato, Grandmother’s actual granddaughter, was fanning herself dramatically, while Shusei and Tamaki were busy ogling Tokyo U’s handsome spiker. (Y/N) rolled her eyes at them. The boys took the menus she handed them.

“Can I start you two off with anything to drink?”

“Water, please.”

“Just a water,” because they were in college, and broke ass college students can’t afford not-water.

Kenma didn’t even open his menu before handing it back to her.

“Something with pork,” he said, after which he pulled out his phone and started scrolling through his emails.

Without batting an eye, the server girl replied, “You got it!” Then, she turned to Kuroo.

“Would you like something specific or if you want, you can give me a general preference like Kenma did, and I’ll give you something you’d like.”

The menu was somewhat thick for a tea house, which Kuroo noticed was because they didn’t just have one country’s dishes, as Chisai’s selection contained an incredible variety.

Now, Kuroo wanted to say either, ‘I trust your judgement’, or ‘I’ll enjoy whatever you put on the table in front of me.’ Sadly, the poor mess of a boy was so preoccupied with thinking about how the girl in front of him was definitely not super adorable in her white collared-shirt and her totally not endearing plaid apron, much less how absolutely unlovable it was that she had flour in her hair from tucking it behind her ear so often. He ended up making a strangled choking sound and saying, “I table.”

Everyone blinked. Forget being a cat, Kuroo fought to repel his inner badger that wanted to dig a hole, crawl inside, and never come out. Kenma was turning red keeping his laughter contained, and as if the universe hadn’t decided it wanted to be a complete dick to the wild-haired boy, he accidentally glanced up at (Y/N)’s cute expression with her brows furrowed, and her lips puckered in confusion.

‘Ahhhhhhhh,’ he thought as his brain short-circuited. Finally, finally, (Y/N) smiled at him gently.

“It’s alright, I do that a lot. Try again?” Oh sweet Karasuno’s resident Jesus, what a sweetheart. Desperate to redeem himself, Kuroo cleared his throat.

“Ahem, I-- Uh-- What’s your favorite dish here?”

‘Amazing job, Tetsurou. You fucking nailed that, Tetsurou. You, sir, are a smooth criminal,’ he told himself. (Y/N)’s bright expression from his question was almost worth making a fool of himself. Almost.

“Ah! Well, I love everything here, and I promise I really do, I’m not contractually obligated to say that, hehe, and it really depends what you prefer personally - everything is delicious.” Kuroo’s soul left his body when she shuffled to his side and leaned over him slightly to point at specific dishes on the menu. She smelled of fresh linen and of fresh baked goodies.

‘Hngggghhhhh, smell good, good smell,’ the poor boy’s brain cells were failing him at the moment, and had been for the past couple of minutes.

“So, if you like shrimp, the har gao comes in orders of 4 and they’re more filling than they look--” (Y/N)’s voice faded away as Kuroo’s brain kept trying to figure itself out like a computer with too many open tabs and had a software virus called, ‘(Y/N) Smells Divine And It’s Not Fair.exe.’ Kuroo knew he was better than this. He knew he was charming and likable. There was no reason for him to totally crumble like he was. From knowing Kuroo so long, Kenma could tell he was struggling, and, out of pity, he lightly kicked his ankle so the girl above him wouldn’t notice. Luckily, that little jolt woke him up enough to catch the tail end of her explanation.

“--you can get it with egg noodles, which I love personally, and Gran gets the duck from a nearby vendor, so you know it’s fresh. It’s especially popular around this time since it’s getting a bit cold,” she finished. It looked like he hadn’t been zoned out for too long. Steeling himself, Kuroo shifted in the cracked burgundy seat.

“That last one sounds great, thank you,” he croaked. Taking the menu from him, (Y/N) told them their order would be out “in a jiffy,” and Kenma’s wheezing stopped him from short-circuiting again.

“What-- Hah-- What was that?” he cackled. Kenma didn’t laugh very hard. Even when he watched Plant compilations or looked at memes, he mostly just blew air through his nose, at best, but here, Kuroo was starting to worry about the shade of blue his friend was turning.

“I--uh” Kuroo started, ‘got distracted by the way she was being adorable and the way her perfume--NO! Tetsurou! BRO-CODE!’. “I’m just a little out of it today I guess.”

“Clearly. You stumbled your words in front of (Y/N) like a panini-head.”

Kuroo couldn’t deny that statement one bit. How had he managed to look like such a panini-head? Why now of all times? Was he nervous? God forbid if he thought he might have a slight crush on this girl because for heaven’s sake he wasn’t about to break the sacred Bro-Code. Before he could go off on his own tangent, (Y/N) walked over to their table carrying a couple of plates in her hands.

“Alrighty, so I’ve got the house cha siu bao for Kenma, and the egg noodle soup with roast duck for Kuroo-san. Is there anything else I can get for you guys?”

“I’m good for now thanks, (Y/N)” Kenma replied as he quickly began eating the fresh, hot pork buns.

“It looks great!” Kuroo responded, his face gleaming with excitement and anticipation of how the food will taste. His expression suddenly changed to a sly smirk, “but you know (Y/N)-san, this meal would be much better if you join us~”

‘Nice, I’ve redeemed myself. Ten points to gryffindor.’

“I’m sorry Kuroo-san, but my shift doesn’t end for another couple of hours. If I end early, I might not be able to make it to the game like I promised.” (Y/N) smiled back innocently.

Before Kuroo was able to say anything, he heard Kenma let out a small, “Pft, rejected”, from beside her.

‘Aaaand, just kidding’

Kuroo miraculously recovered, somehow, and managed to say, “Ah I see. Well thanks for the food, I’m really looking forward to it!”

“Of course! Please enjoy, and let me know if you guys need anything else.” And with that, (Y/N) went back to the kitchen to get more food to serve to customers.

Kenma was deep into his second pork bun when Kuroo dug into his own meal. The duck was perfectly moist with a savory skin. The egg noodles were boiled to a perfect texture. He could’ve wept. The exquisite flavor of the egg noodle soup distracted him from his horrific failure as a human being just a moment ago. Once he’d sated his appetite, he leaned back in his chair. The setter across from him looked totally boneless, a satisfied smile on his face. Kuroo rolled his head over towards the window.

There, the young lady that had been messing with his mind all day was squatting in front of an adorable little girl while the girl’s father laughed heartily across from them. The little girl clapped in delight at the funny faces the waitress was making for her. Kuroo’s heart beat a little faster.

“You’re staring.” Kuroo jumped. Kenma’s intelligent eyes were boring into his soul. Suddenly feeling even guiltier than he already was, Kuroo looked away.

“Kenma, I swear I—“

“Relax. She’s cute. Flirt, stare, call yourself a table, I don’t care.”

Kuroo spluttered at the reminder of his royal screw up. Then, he was puzzled at how Kenma could be so nonchalant about anyone looking at his girlfriend like that, especially his own best friend. He knew for a fact that if Kenma truly didn’t like his ogling at his super cute girlfriend, he would have said something. Maybe they were one of those open relationship-type things? Sounded pretty odd for Kenma, but Kuroo supposed that people change in college. If he were in Kenma’s place, though, he doubted he’d be so willing to share (Y/N)’s affection. Not that he wanted it, of course. Nuh uh, no ma’am.

When (Y/N) gave them their check, they tried to politely decline taking her generous discount, but once she threatened to bring Grandmother from the kitchen, they ended up just tipping her a little extra to make up the difference and exiting the tea house.

~~

“HEY, HEY, HEY.” The ace spiker with the interesting hair crowed as he landed after a vicious spike that went untouched by the other team. Tokyo U’s other team members came together and gave a quick cheer before quickly resuming their positions.

“Damnnnn, how the hell is this entire team so fine?” Shusei moaned.

“Mm, especially that number 6. He’s so pretty,” Tamaki nibbled on her thumb nail.

“Ooh, the handsome guy from this morning is up!”

(Y/N) blushed as Kuroo rotated into the front row. Gone was the stuttering, flustered mess from earlier, and he was replaced by Nekoma High’s scheming captain, all fire in his eyes ,and supported by skill and years of experience. (Y/N) leaned against the rail. Something about that focused look in his eyes captivated her completely.

Kuroo was an excellent blocker. He was smart and had the technique to support it. But despite this, the other team had powerful spikers and was starting to close the gap just enough to make the crowd uneasy. The coach leaned over and whispered something to one of the managers, who scurried off through the door to a side gym.

(Y/N) had already been a little (a lot) thirsty since Kuroo stepped on the court, but Akaashi tossed the ball into the air, Kuroo jumped up, and hit a straight right by the blockers. Suddenly, the gym air felt too stale, her cardigan too hot.

“Ohhhh my goddddd.” (Y/N) shushed Shusei and Tamaki’s moaning.

“Jealous much?” Shusei sassed.

“Wha—? Just— Just stop being weirdos!” she said louder than expected.

Tamaki wiggled her eyebrows, “Oh, so you admit you were jealous?”

(Y/N)‘s face felt hot. Her retort was interrupted by squealing all around them.

“Kyaaaaaa!”

“Omg he’s here!”

“I want his babies!”

…yeah, people get weird when they’re thirsty.

Shusei cheered and clutched Tamaki’s shoulders, “Whooo! What are we screaming about?”

“Some things never change,” Tamaki mused.

“Bitch, what?”

They stopped their bickering when their friend chuckled. She had a fond look in her eyes, but they also held something else they couldn’t quite place. (Y/N) smiled softly. She turned to them, “The Grand King loves making a grand entrance.”

~~

(A/N): You know who’s coming soon, and I’m really excited about this next chapter! Thank you all for the support you’ve shown us so far in the series, and please look forward to the next few chapters as well! Chapter 6 is planned to be released in about two days or so. See you guys soon!

- Admin Kiwi-Chan

Kuroo, honey, I’m so sorry to do this to you lol. I make this boy do stupid stuff in this series, but it’s fiiiine.

- Admin Mango-Chan

~~

Taglist: @joyful-jimin @nekomas-kuroo

[littlemusings2020]

Notes on Rice

The first thing I purchased in preparation to move out of my mother’s home was a rice cooker from a closing Zellers (I still use it religiously)

I had never made rice until I was living on my own, my mother never wanted me in the kitchen

It’s a huge privilege to appear ‘ethnically ambiguous’, the first time I remember talking about my background was at my new school in Grade 2 with my crush at the time, he responded something like “me Asian, me so horny, me eat rice”, I was mortified and stopped talking about it until years after (he never saw me eat rice)

I can only eat rice with chopsticks or recently, my favourite spork I took from Lufthansa Airlines, everything else seems morally wrong

I first suspected I had celiac disease while on my paid internship in Berlin, Germany. Germany is land of bread, but I was pretty content with only eating rice. My most frequented restaurants were the Thai restaurants on Gleimstraße and the Middle Eastern late-night fast food (found all over the city)

When I used the rest of the Shantz styrofoam cooler money to visit my Indonesian family in the Netherlands for the first time, I ate Rijsttafel or ’rice table’ (a Dutch dish adapted from nasi Padang) alone in an Indonesian restaurant in Amsterdam before travelling to Tilburg, ‘nasi’ means ‘rice’ in Indonesia, I used to be obsessed with Indomie brand nasi Goreng instant noodles but it is made of wheat noodles, not rice, I need to learn how to make the traditional rice version

Right now, I have jasmine and sticky rice stored in my designated cupboard, lately sticky rice has been my favourite, but I want to see what kind of rice is best in soups

The first time I had rice in soup was during my last birthday weekend when I was staying with Kristena. It was a Vietnamese soup with bok choy and regular white rice, I’ve made it multiple time since that afternoon

I once started resenting a former lover when they told me ‘pureed soup is fancier and better than broth soup’, my favourite soups are broth soups,  whole rice definitely goes better in broth

My old boss at a job at Chinatown Centre made herself a backpack out of one of the big fabric rice bags and I thought that was so cool. She asked me to bring her any bags I had and to ask my other Asian friends for them. I agreed, but had never purchased one myself until after this conversation (I’ve still been thinking about making one of those backpacks but haven’t yet, Segal’s has tiny bags with handles that I’ve been eying, maybe it could be a cute handbag)

My friend and colleague, Racquel Rowe, did two performances this past year where she washed rice, washing rice isn’t common in Canada, but she told me it’s common in Barbados where she is from, I wasn’t surprised about rice washing because I wash my fabric bag rice, it says to do so in the instructions, I felt comforted by her performances and I wish i saw them live

My French roommate made me rice the first night I moved into my flat in Tiohtià:ke (Montreal) and it was so soggy, they didn’t use my rice cooker and I lol’d and then the next time they made rice they did it again lol steam your rice, don’t just boil it

I am generally a bad cook but my Virgo Venus structure comes through with my rice

My mother bought me Minute Rice a couple years ago and I was so offended, I made her take it back

I asked my friend Kaythi about emotional connections to imported food while researching for Frying Krupuk and she told me “I remember feeling really alien and singled out for the kinds of foods I ate but idk whether this was real or imagined bc it was so long ago 😂I was also being bullied super viciously @ school around this time. my azn-ness feels very rooted in food bc it was also one of the only ways I ever got to experience anything from any asian culture and the only thing it made sense for my fam to practice since my burmese family is really dispersed...RICE! My partner and I keep three different kinds of rice in the house bc one of is is inciting it’s indispensable 🍚🍤, we always have basmati, Thai jasmine, and calorie rice in the house, I don’t eat as mush rice as I want tho”

The last time I bought rice was in Waterloo, ON at the beginning of quarantine. I went to the Bridgeport Sobey’s and felt stressed from the empty shelves and panic buying and left to go to T&T where it was quieter with better stock. I only shopped at T&T until I left mid April

DM me your favourite recipes with rice xx

b. wijshijer/ shrimpychip