#i will be alright

[stemacademics]

behold the list for today:

27-02-2025, monday

study toc

study 50% (at least) syllabus for stat phys quiz on 29th

study theory for lab

revise today's symmetry class

***

get to yesterday's to-do

________

I've already studied a 25% of the syllabus for the quiz. And another 10-15% are portions that only need revision (though are a bit longer than others). Then I'll revise today's symmetry class. Was very important; we started doing symmetries in R^3 today. I need to stare at those solids long enough so it's easier to flip and rotate them in my mind (I face some difficulties in keeping an image/scene in my head for longer than 5-6 secs; it gets a lot better with familiarity, or practice).

I could've made much better use of my evening hours, focusing on coursework; I spent it on Euclid's Elements and Hartshorne TT <3 [huge heart, but crying because midsems are next week and I am doing all that I can to not focus on coursework. why why why. but I also did a good thing by downloading the books on geometry. I can read up a bit before I go to my prof (hopefully, future project supervisor and advisor TT; lord knows how much I want this ahh)]

[sailingonagaydream]

keeping feelings to yourself cause you don't want to bother or worry anyone.

I’m okay.

[frogofalltime]

i'm going to be okay !! my partner sent me some supportive messages and called me their boyfriend !! it made me feel all warm and affirmed and happy. (how do you always know the exact right thing to say ?) you're right i Am strong. i Am brave. i can survive today. i can survive tomorrow. and i will get home tomorrow evening ! that's not too far away ! i'll be able to see my friends without having to keep up a persona around them. i'll get to see my partner when they get home too. (i miss you so much). also the binder that i ordered arrived in the mail so i can finally try it on !! there are so many good things to look forward to. i'm going to be okay !!

[winnie-daze]

Redraw of the twins I Stan

[hotcinnamonsunset]

The Tiger (from the poem by Nael, age 6)🐅

[inkskinned]

she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.

my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.

my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.

my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.

at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.

my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.

i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.

two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.

it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.

[qvert]

[gumy-shark]

made a beautiful google slides infographic in 60 seconds on why u should Fucking Vote

[dxkjf]

Elita please he's trying his best :[

[pillowspace]

GIRLY JUST FOUND OUT ABOUT CYERCE ELEGANS

If Cyerce nigricans is a butterfly, then this is a fairy... Cyerce nigricans for comparison:

[trafficpan-ic]

Well this makes me want to cry

[lullabyminds]

You didn't waste time by surviving.

Getting through a flare up amd getting through a bout of illness or time with your shit parents, it wasn't a waste. College wasn't a waste because you had to drop out.

You were alive and in survival mode. You made it through. You learn things about yourself and learn where your limits were. Learned how your body said I cannot do this anymore.

That's never a waste. All the time you have is yours. Nobody else gets to use it for you and for their own exceptions.

Surviving is enough. Learning to live is enough. Maybe you will never be the hero of a great story, showered in respect and riches.

But you still are part of a story. And you mean a lot to other people's stories.

You might not get a redo but you are alot less alone this way.

Surviving is not a waste of time. Surviving helps you make it to the next part.

You cannot waste time. It all has a purpose.

You're learning how to live. Never shame yourself for that.

Be gentle, you have the time.

[idontmindittakestime]

In July, should the impulse to relate to others strike, I'll watch the Virgin Suicides and join the clouds in their weeping over this equatorial plateau.

[koobiie]

A lone swordsman stands in the chamber. He seems... quite lost.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Dog Meshi.

[aleisters]