#i will answer the rest of the asks eventually

[lovscb97]

railway (b.cc.) ༉‧₊˚.

╰┈➤ˎˊ˗ TRACK 001: part of the step out series

synopsis: you didn’t mean to get tied up with your best friend’s ex-boyfriend, but sometimes all you can do is hold on tight for the rough ride ahead of you, even if it means going against all the pre-written rules of friendship.

tags: best friend's ex!bangchan x fem!reader, angst, forbidden romance, mutually toxic relationship, morally grey characters, chan and reader are both kind of awful, mention of other idols (rest of stray kids, stayc, enhypen, etc), oc as chan's ex-girlfriend (aeri), mentions of alcohol and drinking, kissing, use of nicknames (baby, darling, etc), very brief pussy slapping, possessiveness, mild dacryphilia, car sex, fingering, sir kink, squirting, jealousy, slight exhibitionism, bathroom sex, unprotected sex, rough sex, degradation (bitch, slut, etc), dirty talk, very brief mention of strength kink, mirror sex, breeding kink, creampie, brief choking, slight overstimulation, etc

theme board: www.pin.1003 / song link: prod:b.cc

wc: 7.85k

add. notes: welcome 2 the first course >:] i've offered my insights n analysis on railway alr but delving into the meaning of the song n creating a whole fic based off of it was very intriguing for me esp cus i don't usually write based off of music i listen to. i knew i wanted smth wrong to put out but i don't like infidelity n the usual story on toxic situations is tough to pull of so i decided to go down the more 'scandalous' route of sorts n make chan ur best friend's ex instead :3 there's a pinterest board i made for all these fics which for this one u can find linked above to grasp the aesthetics of it n i'd recommend reading this while listening to railway ofc. as always plz make sure u watch out for the tags n dni if ur a minor. also sidenote but aeri (the oc) is not meant to be seen as giselle from aespa but rather i just used that name bcs it's pretty lol just thought i'd lyk that. either way i hope u all enjoy! 

. . .

19:23 PM from: dni!!! Wyd? 

you swallow thickly at the sight of the text which lights up your screen, eyes zeroed in on the simple three letters which still hold thousands of words worth of meaning in themselves when combined. if it weren’t for the rubber case at the back, you reckon you would’ve dropped your phone with how instantly sweaty your palms become upon having received the message. the way you’re staring at your app, maybe even enough to bore holes into the words displayed back at you, doesn't go unnoticed either, and you barely manage to pocket the device as quick as you'd pulled it out just in time as your best friend approaches you. 

“everything okay? you look kinda pale.” aeri frowns once she’s in front of you, voice laced with concern so sweet that it almost makes bile rise up your throat as you attempt to lean back against jake’s kitchen counter to stabilise yourself. she doesn’t seem to buy the eventual shaky nodding of your head that you offer after realising she’d just asked you something that required an answer, but even if she wants to probe you further, she doesn’t, deciding to immerse you in conversation about something your other friends had told her; another one of her gossip sessions with yoon and jungwon, you presume.

her storytelling fades into background noise at some point, for you can’t ignore the heavy weight of the object tucked away in the back of your jeans, still incessantly burning and buzzing with notifications you know you shouldn’t pay half a mind to. you’re well aware that they’re all most likely from the same person; the one individual you shouldn’t and have no right to indulge and mix with to this day; whose bedsheets you’ve found yourself tangled up in late at night alongside dirty noises slipping past both your lips; the very man who remains as sin personified in the storyline of your current life, and honestly might stay that way for as long as you live.

or in other words, aeri’s ex-boyfriend, chan.

your best friend met chan in her final year of university, bumping into him on chance encounter outside her lecture hall and exchanging textbooks by accident. chan had been all smiles when she’d invited him to lunch as an apology for the mix up, often tagging along with her after that until soon enough, they grew close enough and began seeing each other romantically. he seemed to treat her well for the most part, and you were happy for aeri that she’d found a good man worth her time and effort in the world. she’d drag you with her on their outings one too many times, and you’d gotten to know him from those instances, finding him to be a decent match for her.

unfortunately, all good things come to an end, and the spark between them started dwindling. you’re not sure what exactly happened, only able to recall bits and pieces from what aeri had told you mid-sob on your calls about her previous lover slowly becoming distant nearing the final stages of their relationship, so you’ve always just thought it was a mutual decision to cut ties for the betterment of each other. according to her vividly detailed breakdowns though, chan had been the one to suggest calling it off first, and everything came to a screeching halt three years down the line with much screaming and tears from her side. to an extent, their split did shake up things a little between all your mutual friends, but it also didn’t fully stop everybody from engaging with each other. all this brings you to your current situation— waiting in jake’s apartment for the rest of your friends to arrive for a random party he’d decided to plan on a whim.

“yo, guys!” speak of the devil, you think, tugging yourself out of your thoughts as you turn your body to let jake’s figure come into view. he beams at you like a big puppy, his hair flopping in a way that loosely resembles dog ears, and you remember after a split second that that’s just how your friend is referred to as in your group; the resident golden retriever. he parades up to you and aeri as one too, his vibrant smile lighting up the atmosphere in a way that you can’t stop relief from flooding your system at his presence.

“how are my favourite girls doing this fine evening?” he smirks, his usual flirting the same as always, causing aeri to roll her eyes as you chuckle. “har har up yours, sim.” she sticks her tongue out, prompting jake to do the same as he ruffles her hair, to which she shrieks. “oh, by the way,” jake perks up as if he’s just thought of something, completely ignoring your best friend smacking him on the arm lightly over his actions. “y/n, would you be so kind as to get the pack of beer from my car?” he pleads, doe eyes twinkling under the light of the room. 

you’re about to groan in protest, not wanting to go back out in the cold and freeze your ass off for a measly few cans of alcohol, but the front door swinging open accompanied by the all too familiar voice you’ve grown acquainted to fills the air, making your stomach drop— chan. chan is here. suddenly, you’re not too opposed to getting far away, and you quickly nod your head rapidly in agreement, not bothering to wait for the way jake lights up at you accepting his proposal before snatching the keys from his hold and darting towards the lift. 

chan’s jaw tightens at this. he barely manages to catch a glimpse of you from how you rush out past him, not even able to take in your outfit or face in the dashing haze you leave in. he points his thumb to where you had exited, bluffing something about helping you when jake responds how you’d gone out to grab the load of drinks he’d been too lazy to heave upstairs himself. nobody makes any work to question him when he turns on his heel to catch the elevator himself, thinking nothing of his usual gentleman-like behaviour.

nobody except for a pair of eyes lingering on his disappearing frame that neither one of the visitors in the house manages to grasp onto.

meanwhile, you quickly find yourself in the outdoor parking lot of jake’s building, hugging your shivering body tightly in an effort to warm yourself up against the chilling wind that blows past the trees. the sky has basically turned dark by now, but the streetlamps hanging overhead on the sides of the pavement serve as enough illumination to carry out your task. your breath comes out in heavy smoke to the point you can see it, and you try your best to spot your friend’s car as soon as possible, cheering internally when you manage to do so. after having jogged on over to it, you enter the key into the trunk lock with trembling fingers, twisting it until that same latch you’ve grown used to feeling with your own vehicle opens and makes way for you to push up the boot lid. 

you’re about to hook underneath to manoeuvre it open, that is, until a sudden cold hand tugs on the bare skin of your arm, making you jump out of your own flesh. you open your mouth to yell out loud, ready to alert your friends a few floors upstairs that someone is trying to kidnap you potentially when that same hand clamps over it. only when your vision stabilises in your dimly lit surroundings do you recognise chan in front of you, and you feel your shoulders physically drop as you put down your defences, glaring at him when he removes himself.

“why the hell would you sneak up on me like that? i—“

“are you avoiding me?”

his question comes out gruff and annoyed, causing you to blink at the way he’s glowering at you in suspicion. his arms are crossed against his chest, hiding the black button-up you’ve seen him wearing and committed to memory one too many times from how it clings perfectly onto his chiselled shoulders and biceps. it makes you gulp, but you attempt to hide your affected reaction anyways, delivering a scoff in his direction which only makes chan grit his teeth at your attitude. “so what if i am? you know damn well either way without needing me to spell it out for you.” you bite back, moving to turn around when he catches you by the elbow, leaving you to scowl at him.

“what’s gotten into you? just a few days ago, we were fine, yet now you’re ignoring my texts?” he narrows his eyes, holding you in place so you can’t budge away from him. you let out a faint tch at his words, more so at your own susceptibility to succumb to his advances, but chan tongues the side of his cheek after assuming you’re just being blatantly disrespectful towards him. his voice drops to a lower, seductive tone as he speaks up again. “need me to remind you again? you came over last saturday and humped my thigh before squirting on my tong— hmph!“ 

“god, yes, i fucking remember, okay?” you exclaim in a whisper after having slapped a hand over his mouth this time, eyes darting around frantically to make sure no one heard that. “could you be any more louder? jesus christ.” chan peels you off of him shortly afterwards, his expression souring at the way you address him. something about the anger in his features makes your own rise, and you feel any or all remorse you'd experienced prior to seeing him in person today vanish, replaced with a bubbling hatred of sorts.

you and chan began your weird affiliation with one another around two months ago, exactly a few days after he and your best friend broke up. to this day, you don’t know why he made a move on you, much less why you yourself reciprocated it. sure, you’d always found him objectively attractive when he and aeri were together, and while he may be your exact match of an ideal type to a tee, you would never think to act on the growing tension you experienced for him, especially when he was in a long term commitment with the closest person in the world to you. 

it all happened in the most random of occurrences too. you still remember meeting him the night you were out at the convenience store to run errands, catching him hunched over a table in a hoodie and messy hair with two bottles of soju in front. he’d flashed you a polite smile and offered to drink together, which realistically, you should’ve declined. you should’ve turned the other way in disgust and walked out on him to tell your best friend what he’d attempted to do, regardless of whether that would’ve led to something or not. instead, you found yourself in his bed that day, moaning his name as he ravished you under the moonlight streaming through his curtains in your combined drunken craze.

the next morning had been full of hiccuped cries, chan cradling you in his arms despite the scalding touch of his hold gnashing against you and leaving metaphorical imprints that you would never be able to scrub off. each time he soothed you, rubbing your back and kissing your hair, you felt the waves of guilt wash over harsher than the last. he continued to reassure you throughout anyways, telling you it’d be okay and that no one would have to know. blindly, you’d believed him, promising yourself and him to never act on either of your arbitrary lust by not letting go of your inhibitions.

that was the first lie you told yourself. 

“y’know, i’m really not a fan of this whole backtalk towards me.” chan criticises, and you laugh bitterly after picking up on his audible disappointment as it hits your ears. “see? there it is again. maybe i’ve gotta teach you some manners, hm?” his tone is sultry once more, leaving you fighting the urge to flush under his gaze. you ultimately lose though, wanting nothing more than to punch him in the face with the way he snickers at your cheeks reddening crimson. instead, you try retain the little dignity you have left as you push against his chest, scanning your parameters with paranoia when he steps closer to you.

“we can’t.” you mumble, clearly slipping. chan’s only response to that is a breathless huff, warm against your face as you peer up at him through your lashes, finally getting a good look at him. he’s wearing his signature hoop earrings today, hair brushed down so his bangs fall over his forehead. the collar of that same dress shirt he’s got on is popped despite a few buttons being undone, leaving the styling choice to highlight his collarbone. that same milky skin you’ve ghosted your nails over multiple times hides underneath the black fabric, leaving you to shiver at the memories of it. it also doesn’t help that the way he towers you is sending your mind reeling into submission way too easily, and you only manage to shake out of it when his fingers trail down to wrap around your wrist, allowing you to feel the cold metal of a ring you recognise all too well press into your joint—

the same half of a promise ring you’d helped him pick out for aeri a year ago.

the realisation that he’s still wearing it hits, and combined with the once again forming shame in the back of your head, it all makes you want to shove him away in favour of storming out of here to tell your best friend everything once and for all. a part of you can sense undue jealousy simmering inside at the fact that he’s still got a piece of her with him too, something you know you have no right to feel, but you try ignore it to your best ability. “chan, we can’t.” you repeat with a hitch in your breath, more so for yourself than him. and yet, you don’t even believe your own words, finding the less rational and weak side of you surrendering to the temptation chan tantalises in you; it overshadows whatever morality you have left.

“d’you really want me to stop?” he breathes out, body sagging far too close into yours for it to be friendly, although you suppose none of your interactions since starting this scandalous relationship have ever been that. his fingers, the very same ones bearing the ring on them, move to wrap around your throat, forcing you to tilt your head up and lock eyes with him. goosebumps prick your skin when you catch sight of the way his gaze is hooded, orbs swirling with black desire he’s begun to reserve only for you in these coming weeks. “because, if you want me to stop, i will.” chan points out. “say the word and i’ll turn around. out of sight, out of mind.” he makes a statement out of it by retracting his hand from you, but the very distinct whine you let out is all the confirmation he needs to press his mouth to yours.

kissing chan always feels like playing with fire. it scorches, and singes, and sears, reducing you to a burnt crisp, yet you can’t help but yearn for the flame he ignites in you. even the way he’s clutching onto you now, pressing forward with a fervour only you bring out in him, has his lips moulding against your cherry stained ones despite not fitting as perfectly as you’d want them to. the two of you are by no means a compatible match for each other; neither of you has made a single good decision ever since you began indulging in whatever you’ve got going on, but you also can’t help but crave the scandalous nature of everything. you’re truly a despicable pair, you think.

“get in the car.” chan’s voice cuts through your thoughts when he pulls away. he doesn’t even give you time to think when he walks over and opens the door, gesturing inside to the warm confines of the backseat. ideally, you shouldn’t, you know you shouldn’t, but alas, you’ve never been one to listen to yourself, instead finding your legs scrambling and following suit to shuffle into jake’s vehicle before the weight of your actions even sinks in. chan’s hot on your trail too, and before you can even get comfortable in the cramped space, he’s returning to making out with you, fingers roaming greedily around the expanse of your skin. 

“t-they’ll know we’re gone.” you stutter, moving your face out of his reach to try and stop chan’s movements when it finally dawns on you that your friends had sent you out on an errand you’d taken far too long to complete by now. chan’s only response is to grunt though, tugging you back in for another smouldering kiss that knocks the wind out of your lungs. his hands grasp, pinch, and squeeze whatever part of you they can, until he’s finally decided that he’s had enough foreplay, opting to cage you underneath him and hike up the tight, red dress that’s adorning your body for today’s occasion. “i’ll be quick. i always am.” he winks, and you’re too far gone now to understand that he’s responding to your previous comment, a fact that only makes him chuckle.

“wore this to tease me, yeah?” chan clicks his tongue at the way he has to practically peel off the bottom half of your clothing, the snug fit of the fabric around your curves leaving nothing to the imagination as he bites his lip. he debates whether he’s glad you chose this outfit to show off for him, or if that pisses him off because it means everybody gets an eyeful of your figure; he decides on the latter. “wanted to slut yourself out for my attention? all you had to do was ask, baby.” you shake your head with a whimper, and he raises an eyebrow at your reaction. “d-didn’t.. didn’t wear it for you.” you manage to breathe out, which proves to be the wrong answer because next thing you know, his hand is coming down to smack your clothed core.

you yelp at the sting of his actions, teary eyes blinking up at him in a way that makes chan’s boxers tighten. he’s so close to losing his composure, but he holds back for your sake, not wanting to let you see his cool slip. “is that so? i guess you’re just a dirty girl then.” he sneers, yanking down your soaked panties in one swift motion, leaving you to gasp as the cool air hits your sticky folds.

chan wastes not even one second, knobby digits dragging through the wetness he’s not surprised to find whatsoever. he spreads it over your clit, getting you messier than you already are, especially from the way you appear to leak even more arousal from his movements. he touches you until you’re twitching under his hold, biting back the sounds that threaten to escape you, which seems to be a fact he doesn’t approve of from the way he pinches your nub between his fingers; you cry out softly from the rush of stimulation it shoots through you. “eyes on me.” chan growls, sliding his hand down to circle your oozing hole before he’s abruptly shoving two fingers inside.

“fuck.” you moan this time, loud and clear. this seems to satisfy him, seeing as he rewards you with a steady pump of his digits thrusting into your heat. his speed in fingering you increases quickly, and it isn’t long before he’s scissoring you open, the sloppy sounds of your juices slicking up his fingers and echoing in the stuffy space of jake’s car. you’re probably staining the leather of the seats, but neither you nor chan seem to care about that right now, not when he’s knuckle deep inside your wet cunt and you’re making such pretty noises all for him.

“just filthy, aren’t ya? getting finger fucked in the back of your friends car. i bet your dumb little brain can’t even understand what i’m saying right now.” chan mocks, his tone laced with a level of condescension that only makes you buck your hips up to chase his movements. you know he’s completely right too, because the way he’s thrusting his digits inside you, stroking your warm walls with the tips of them has you seeing stars to the point you can’t even respond back something snarky in return. “all you’re good for is being a nasty toy for sir’s use, hm?” you barely even register his question, only remembering you need to answer him when he pulls his wet hand away to smack you once more, this time over your swollen bundle of nerves.

“y-yes, sir. only a toy for you. jus’ you.” you mindlessly slur out, and chan groans at that. not even a moment passes before he’s sinking his fingers back inside you, curling them up to massage that rough spot which always has you clenching down on him. his expression twists to a smug one when you jerk forward instantly. bingo, he thinks. “that’s that spot there, yeah? the one that has you losing yourself on me?” he coos, but his voice drips with a smidge of venom you can’t quite fixate on just yet. instead, you nod dumbly, spasming around him as you try grind upwards to chase the rising sensation of your climax. 

chan leans into your frame, one hand splayed flat onto jake’s backseat above your head to maintain his balance whilst his body hovers over you. by now, your eyes are clenched shut, but he can’t even find it in him to get mad at you over that, not when you’re dribbling down his wrist and mewling so pretty under the glow of the night as he works you towards your orgasm. “c’mon, baby. cum f’me. wanna see you cum so pretty for sir.” he encourages, jaw locked with concentration. 

it only takes about one or two flicks of his expertly trained thumb pressing on your puffy clit, combined with the pads of his fingers hitting your g-spot with terrifying accuracy, before you’re shuddering through your climax. a small, clear stream of liquid sprays out the sides of where he’s got you plugged up, and he pulls his hand away in favour of rubbing you over to coax out the last remnants of your high. your quivering body thrashes when he tries to draw out the remaining few droplets again, weakly bringing your arm up to push him away gently when the shocks of overstimulation begin to take over. chan dips down to place one, final kiss on your lips, smooching down to your chin as a way to say you did well. his actions make you heart beat out of your chest, but you don’t say anything about the domesticity of them. 

you wonder if he ever treated aeri like this after having been intimate with her.

“go in first. i’ll clean up the car.” chan clears his throat after a short while, not daring to make eye contact with you as he quietly pulls your underwear back up your legs. you watch in silence while he sits up, looking for a rag to fix the mess you two made when that same awkward air you’ve gotten used to facing with him enters the atmosphere, leaving you to try and ignore how it tugs at the strings of your soul as you give a curt nod. “don’t forget the beer.” you remind him before swinging the door open to step outside, finding yourself back in the nipping cold of the winter night.

you try and stand on your wobbly legs to straighten out the creases of your dress, paying no mind to the way your skin echoes with the ghost of chan’s previous touch. behind you, you can hear him rolling down the windows to let the musky smell of sex out of jake’s backseat, and you almost dare to sneak a glance back until deciding against it, knowing it’ll just hurt more. instead, you close your eyes and take a deep breath, opening them to land on the small balcony of your friend’s apartment where the rest of your group seems to have already gathered from the silhouettes you can see through the foggy glass. your conscience feels heavy with the weight of the knowledge that aeri is up there too, but you brush it off, just like all the other times you have.

i didn’t do anything wrong, you tell yourself, i’m still in the clear. that’s the second lie you’ve tried to believe in these last two months. a long sigh escapes your lips at that realisation, but you bite it down when making your way back inside the building, choosing to rack your brain on what shitty excuse you’ll have to provide this time for being gone so long.

. . .

to your surprise, nobody bothers to question why either you or chan disappeared, simply whisking you back in conversation about unrelated topics when you walk in through the door a few minutes before him. as per usual, your heart still feels heavy when you watch aeri laugh at something heeseung and sieun are arguing over, but you cover it up by letting out a noise of amusement yourself, hoping it throws off any suspicion that might be directed your way. you don’t bother turning your head upon hearing jake’s delight at the sight of chan entering his apartment with the very much requested pack of beer too, deciding to force a smile at whatever point heeseung is busy making over looking back no matter how much your body itches to do so.

it’s even worse how from the corner of your eye, you can see aeri shifting uncomfortably on her feet at her ex-boyfriend’s second arrival, her expression dropping in the slightest so as to not draw attention to herself, but it’s still enough for you to notice. it only makes the weight of your actions dawn on you further, and you can’t help but let your mind wander as to what she’d say if she knew what truly went on behind closed doors. despite your best efforts to bury those thoughts beneath you though, you know there’s nothing you can do to make amends to the problems you’ve created yourself. after all, you’ve got to reap what you sow.

the party continues to kick in on full swing after that, with you and aeri both doing your best to keep your distances from chan for all too different reasons. it doesn’t help that you can feel someone’s stare raking across your figure throughout the duration of the evening, and when you finally do decide to sneak a glance in that direction with expectations of finding chan ogling you over, you’re met with a different answer—

for it isn’t you he’s busy looking at, but rather your best friend that’s been glued to your side since the beginning of the night. 

he averts his gaze as quick as he’d cast it when you catch him, seamlessly blending back in discussion with whatever nonsense changbin is rambling about this time, acting like he hadn’t just been getting an eyeful of his ex-girlfriend moments prior. you also don’t miss how he fiddles with the old ring that adorns his right hand, long fingers twisting it around the middle digit in a way that’s reminiscent of his past behaviour, or at least based on what you’d often find him doing back then. 

his actions spark a memory deep from the confines of your brain, one you wish you hadn’t remembered as the vision of chan asking you to help pick out promise rings for him and aeri crosses your mind. it was raining heavily that day, but he’d insisted that the two of you go out in secret anyways so he could buy his then girlfriend a token of his love and appreciation. he’d claimed you knew her taste the best and could therefore help in selecting a better possible gift for their upcoming anniversary than he ever could. 

you’d hesitantly agreed, and although you weren’t sure how it would all play out, you later found yourself sharing an umbrella and visiting various jewellery stores to point out all the designs you knew your closest friend would adore. chan had settled soon on a matching pair for the two of them, beaming in your direction with a bright smile that left you weak in the knees despite however much you tried to hide it. a few days later, aeri excitedly showed off her own silver band to you, buzzing about how he’d chosen the perfect present that she couldn’t wait to replace with a real one in their future; you couldn’t help then but think if he ever told her it was all your idea instead of his.

“hey, can you hold my phone?” your best friend’s voice cuts through your inner replay, and you blink in a daze to find her facing you, expression innocent. “hyunjin asked to play beer pong, and i don’t have any pockets to put it away in safely.” she explains at your confused face, but all you can do is nod as you robotically outstretch your arm to take it off of her. unfortunately or fortunately, that’s when you notice it—

the same matching ring on her hand.

aeri doesn’t pay you any attention when she drops off her device into your awaiting palm, not even realising you’re zeroed in on the jewellery that decorates her left hand with a fire burning in your eyes that you’re both ignorant of. you don’t stop gaping even when felix shakes your shoulder, asking you what you’re so fixated on before leaving you be under the impression that you’re probably just drunk out of your head. meanwhile, you’re still frozen in place, everything around you seeming to slow down.

why is chan wearing a ring he bought for his ex-girlfriend two years ago to a party he knows she’s going to be at? no, why does said ex-girlfriend also have her matching pair of the ring on her hand at a party she too is aware he’s going to be present for? much less, why are either of them hung up on each other to the point they’re carrying around reminders of their past relationship with one another? you know the answer to all these questions, but you don’t wish to sit and delve into them in fear you might throw up at the conclusion they’ll give you. instead, all you can do is squeeze the can of seltzer you’d spiked in your hand dangerously tight out of unwanted emotion, enough for some of the liquid inside to spill out. you can’t be bothered to care about it though, just like how you can’t be bothered to care about how anybody in their right mind could probably see you gawking at chan right now.

you watch as he cracks up at a joke seungmin makes, his head falling back in a fit of laughter you’ve been a happy witness or recipient of multiple times, yet this time it fills you with emotion that you don’t wish to identify in fear it’d mean something more than what you’re capable of confronting right now. even so, you can’t stop the train of questions invading your thoughts at the view in front of you. did he laugh like that with aeri? smile so wide with her? couldn’t help the joy that spread across due to her presence? maybe that’s why he came today, because he couldn’t take his mind off of her, especially seeing as he was wearing a symbol of their time spent before right now. 

but, what does that say about you in this picture? were you just a scapegoat to escape all those feelings for him? had you been one this entire time, only deluding yourself into thinking what you both had translated into a situation deeper and could potentially progress into one even more had things happened under different circumstances? the more you think, the more you feel nauseous, and you can’t stop yourself from diverting your gaze to where your best friend is, observing her concentrated face as she attempts to aim a ping pong ball into one of the lined up solo cups. your eyes involuntarily flicker to the ring on her finger once more, its evident shimmer reflecting in the light causing you to clutch your drink tighter. 

you’re not a jealous person by any means. you know your boundaries, hence you know chan isn’t yours. he isn’t an object you can own, and neither are you to him. that was the unspoken agreement you both nodded on when you got into this entire ordeal— you’re both free to see other people openly in front of aeri as long as it’s not each other, because the latter you manage in secret despite the shame that surges in you two upon doing so. it doesn’t matter if you wish to stake your claim on him, to see the marks you leave on him evident on his skin the next morning for him to show off other girls who think they stand a chance at him taking them to bed. it doesn’t matter how much your heart aches when you wake up to the blanket strewn aside from his absence, the sheets long gone cold to indicate that he’d left hours ago. it doesn’t matter how much you wish to cling onto his arm in public and profess your.. feelings for him in front of everyone else.

it simply doesn’t matter, it never did. chan’s never been yours, and he never will be anytime soon.

20:51 PM from: Myself meet me at the upstairs bathroom in five

you punch in the message before you can even think, watching it turn from delivered to read in a matter of seconds. the three dots next to chan’s side of texts appear, indicating that he’s typing, but you choose to lock your device rather than waiting like a dog to see him reply. instead, your feet lead you to your designated location, taking one step at a time leisurely as opposed to in a rush so as to not draw unwanted attention to yourself. right as you reach the door handle, your phone pings with a familiar ringtone.

20:52 PM from: dni!!! Reacted with “👍🏻” to your message

you sigh. tonight was going to be a long night.

. . .

skin slapping. heavy panting. low grunting. 

that’s all you can hear from where you’re splayed across the sink in the small confines of jake’s bathroom, aside from the occasional thumping of music booming from downstairs. if you strain your ear enough, you’ll be able to make out the lyrics to the cliche song that’s come up on shuffle, but you honestly lack the mentality to care about that right now, especially considering the way chan has your legs pushed apart in favour of drilling his length into you. each thrust is rapid and fervent in nature, seeming to knock the wind out of your lungs to the point you don’t even realise how loud you’re being until his hand comes up to shove two fingers in your mouth. “be fucking quiet.” he sneers, leaving you to drool everywhere. the only reaction he spares when you try muffle out an apology is a sickening smirk at that too. 

“needed this, didn’t you, slut? always need to be filled with some cock like a bitch in heat.” chan chuckles, but there’s a dark edge to his voice that sends shivers crawling up your spine. he presses down on your tongue with the pads of his fingers, and you can’t stop the garbling of spit choking past your lips from the way his thickness nestles deep inside you. each heavy drag of his dick against your rough walls leaves you clenching and attempting to buck your hips forward, but you can’t even manage that with the grip he has on your waist. the mere idea that all chan really needs to restrain you is the simple strength of his one hand sends your mind reeling, so much so that you don’t even realise he’s speaking to you until the hand that was previously in your mouth pulls out to slap light and wet against your cheek.

“i asked you a question, whore.” chan growls, the sound resonating warm within your stomach despite the mean undertone to it as his movements still. you blink up at him in confusion at this point, doe eyes brimming with tears that threaten to spill from the loss of pleasure in a way that has chan damn near finishing. it doesn’t help that he’s buried to the hilt currently, hissing painfully at how you squeeze down on him in involuntary instinct. for a split second, you swear you see the ridges on his face soften, and the manner in which he looms over you feels filled with more comfort than intimidation, but that smidge of emotion vanishes as soon as it arrives. “i said,” chan’s tongue swipes over his bottom lip. “do you wanna get caught?” you rapidly shake your head no at that, and chan cocks his head to the side.

“oh, really?” he muses, nails sliding over to dig into the supple flesh of your thigh, making you whine out loud. “‘cause with the way you’re making so much noise like that, i’d have assumed the opposite.” with a click of his tongue, his actions resume. luckily, all that escapes you is a loud gasp this time, an anxious clamp of your palm over your mouth barely covering up the rest of your lewdity. you wish so desperately to refute, to plead him in favour of slowing down and having some mercy, but the sensation of his bulbous cockhead slamming roughly into that one spot only sends stars in your vision and prevents your previous desires. 

your body jerks in chan’s hold even more when his same hand still lubed with your saliva finds it way between where you’re connected, leaving you to suppress a pathetic whimper that longs to bubble out of your throat as he presses the tips of his fingers to your swollen clit. his touch is harsh, filled with an overwhelming need to make you burst at the seams, but the fear that lingers in the back of your head refuses to let you fall apart so easily, not when aeri is barely a flight of stairs from your vicinity. chan decides he isn’t fond of the silence you’re giving him though, pulling out with a quiet mumble for you to get down and face the mirror. he sheaths himself back in just as quickly, setting an unforgiving pace from the seemingly more accessible position, and this time, you really can’t stop the long drawn out moan that escapes you. 

“j-just like that, yeah, baby? all those filthy noises are just for me, aren’t they?” he sounds more delirious this time, presumably drunk off the essence of this situation from the possessive gibberish he’s spouting, just like he always does in the heat of the moment. unfortunately for you, you’re no better than him, nodding furiously in agreement as you babble high-pitched and breathy. “so good, sir! s-so, so fucking good, feels so good! wan’ cum f’you, p-please. ‘m a good girl, please lemme cum, please, please, please.” small stutters spew out of you mid-sentence, but neither of you can be bothered by them, too wrapped up in the throes of all-consuming passion and contempt even to register what’s being said. 

“such a nasty, nasty girl.. getting fucked by your best friend’s ex. don’t you feel a-any shame?” chan groans almost wearily in midst of his lust-filled haze, eyes catching yours from the reflection of the mirror that’s displaying you getting absolutely wrecked right now. the sight of you so fucked up and in bliss, no coherent thought visible by the looks of your dazed expression and tongue halfway lolling out— it all has him burning with hot, rampant hunger. hunger for you, hunger to claim you. “look at yourself.” he rasps, fingers clutching at your chin to force you into meeting where he is. “look how dirty you are, fuck. what would she say about you wrapped so warm and snug around my cock? hm? think we should— ah. think we should call her in and find out?” 

the tears that were brewing in your waterline are streaming down your face by now, horrifically mimicking the disgusting manner in your wetness seeping and dripping down chan’s balls. you feel awful. downright terrible and tainted, forever branded by the searing touch of chan’s skin grazing against yours because that’s what you are, that’s what you have been for the past two months. down from the night you let him lead you into his sheets, following the countless occasions you found yourself returning there, and finally falling to now, your underwear strewn across the tiles of jake’s bathroom as you spread your legs for the same man who broke your best friend’s heart; the same man who you’ve let into yours after very consciously disregarding the repercussions of your actions. 

you’re truly a loathsome piece of work.

“think she’d like to watch me fill this pussy up? watch me shoot my load deep inside you over and over again until i’m sure it’s taken?” chan mutters, hot breath fanning against your sweaty neck. “maybe i should breed this stupid cunt full of my seed and send you back out there with it spilling past your legs. that way, every time you sit down, you’ll feel it inside you.” the mental image of his release lodged in your walls as you’re surrounded by all your friends, surrounded by the one person you’ve both been hiding from, all of them oblivious to the way he’s staked his claim on you except for the shared knowledge between you two and you two only— it has you quivering to the point you physically keen in his hold. chan, however, just laughs sadistically at your reaction. 

“you’ll feel it as a reminder of me, yeah? a reminder that you’re just as terrible as me. coming to me to get this slutty cunt stuffed even though you know you shouldn’t.” he continues to whisper. “after all, it takes two to tango, darling.” chan makes it a point to tilt his hips up in an effort to ensure his mushroom tip hits your g-spot with precise force, all the while breathlessly uttering more sickening words in your ear in hopes of fulfilling your need for relief. 

surely enough, the combination of his cock shoving itself past your opening and his guilt-inducing remarks that only make you sob harder work you up to the point of no return. all it really takes after that is one touch of his thumb to your pulsating nub to eventually have you seizing up in no time, your pussy messily tightening and gushing as your high crashes over you in large waves of ecstasy. it seems to trigger him too, because by the time you even realise you’re there, chan’s twitching and leaking spurts of thick cum inside you. there’s so much of it that it trickles past where he’s got you plugged up, and you barely comprehend yourself pushing a hand near your oozing hole to catch it on your fingertips. 

you both come to slowly, ragged breathing that fills the air growing quieter to pair with the musk of the room. chan’s gaze is still trained on you through the mirror, unreadable just like always whenever you’ve made the same mistake again, but you take the opportunity in this instance specifically to raise the hand that’s collected his seed in it to your mouth, proceeding to lick up the droplets of his excess release. even though you don’t catch his stare in the reflection, you can still feel it burning holes through your head, a fact that only leaves goosebumps rising over your skin. it’s only when you pull your hand away once more to catch the last of his remaining cum that he decides to finally interject, grabbing your palm in his coarse one with hooded eyes. they’re blown out when he tugs your back flush into his chest, the impact leaving his length pushing deeper inside, and they’re blown out when his fingers wrap around your neck to give it a slight squeeze, the little loss of oxygen making your mind spin.

“you think that’s funny? teasing me even after i just fucked you? after i left my mark on you and made sure you know that you’re mine?” chan murmurs, lips sultrily ghosting the shell of your ear. you want to fixate on what he’d addressed you as, let it marinate in your thoughts and brood over it for the next weeks to come even if it was just an absentminded slip of the mouth, but your focus is interrupted by the moving of his hips against yours picking up once more. the previously repeated actions send his dick driving into you again, breaching your cervix and pressing deliciously into every nook and cranny in a way that has you nearly losing your footing, but chan is quicker to hold you up with his free hand. “w-wait, ‘m still sensitive.” you manage to tremble out at a particularly well-placed graze of his cock, but chan doesn’t seem to care, grinding into you even more eagerly at your admission to the point you struggle to keep the sounds spilling out you at bay.

there’s a resounding knock on the door all of a sudden, one that makes your breath hitch and your chest twist in uneasiness. some part of you feels wary and on edge, and you would assume chan’s movements would halt at that, but he doesn’t show any signs of stopping, ignoring your frantic attempts to make him do so by holding you in place instead as he begins to pick up the pace. “s-stop, we’ll get caught.” you heave out upon the noise of skin slapping rising in volume. you do your best to stand your ground, to avoid the gradual closing of your eyes and the mushy fog of your brain clouding over in euphoria, but it’s to no avail. you’re about to let go of your inhibitions completely, to forget about what had just happened and throw caution into the wind in order to lose yourself in the moment, until—

“y/n, i know you’re in there with chris.”

. . .

comments and reblogs are always appreciated! <3

© all rights reserved to @/lovscb97, do not plagiarise, translate, re-upload, etc 

[whysoblue2]

Could you tell us how Kallamar and Shamura reacted to the arrival of Helianthine? It seems that Heket loves to be an aunt, while Narinder's is somewhat complicated role. What about the rest?

That's a good question! Sorry for taking ages to reply but I wanted to put it in on silly long-ass comic format as usual because I have no self-restraint! 🤣💙 Let's start with Uncle Kall!

It is said that since Helianthine started getting uppies from her Uncle, Kallamar had been sick way more often! But he won't complain... well... won't complain too much! Also Answering Anon as well with this, so hope you see it and like it!

Auntcle Mura was hard to crack... but eventually, even war bends down in front of cuteness! Thank you, everyone, for asking about Helianthine, I am starting to think she is going to need a spin-off... this was a lot of work Phew! Hope you all enjoy 🌻💚🐛

[thursdayinspace]

ficlet: breakfast of champions

Here's a smutty little thing because you know Mulder has a favorite place in the world and spends as much time there as he can. tagging @today-in-fic

Sometimes he asks himself how he used to spend Saturday mornings before he and Scully started sharing a bed. He never wants to go back to that time.

She’s trembling through her second orgasm and he licks her through it, ignoring his own painful hardness. He’ll get off eventually, but he’s not done with her yet. He’s never done with her. It’s unfortunate that they can’t do this all day, but they still have to do things like eat and sleep and work. It’s too bad really. He’d live down here if he could.

“Mulder,” she whimpers, and he rests his cheek against her thigh. Her fingers go slack in his hair and the muscles in her thighs relax slowly, and he closes his eyes.

“Good?” he asks.

“Oh god.” She sounds wrecked and it makes him proud, so proud. “Do you need me to answer that?”

He lifts his head and grins up at her. “Yes, please.”

She laughs breathlessly, her face flushed, her hair a wild, flaming-red mess. “Yes,” she says. “And you know it.”

“I’m glad to hear it.” He catches her hand and places a tender kiss against her fingers. “I can make it even better.”

“I don’t know if I can come again,” she says, but her eyes are still hungry, and he thinks he might die if he doesn’t get his mouth back on her.

“You can,” he tells her. “And I’ll prove it to you.”

Her hands run through his hair and the look in her eyes is challenging. “You can try,” she says.

Oh, he thinks, he’ll do more than that.

Hooking his arms underneath her thighs, he spreads her legs as wide as he can and sets to work. She lets out a shuddering exhale as he licks through her folds. She’s swollen and wet and so sensitive, and this is his favorite thing in the world, drowning in the smell and taste of her until nothing else exists in the world. Just Scully and Scully’s pleasure and the pleasure of doing this for her.

He sucks on her clit, pushes his tongue deep into her, buries his entire face in her cunt until he can’t breathe. God she’s perfect.

Her fingers pull his hair hard as she comes on his tongue, her thighs shaking as her hips rock up against his face with the frantic rhythm of her third orgasm.

He only takes the time to tell her, “I told you so,” before he dives back in.

She doesn’t tell him to stop, she keeps her hands in his hair and her legs open, his name falling from her lips like a prayer over and over as he worships her the way she deserves.

And he makes her come again. Again. And again.

When she can’t anymore, when she’s done, she guides him into her and he lasts a handful of thrusts, mere moments before he groans out her name and falls apart in her arms.

They shower, they get dressed. They go about their day. In the afternoon, she’s making coffee in the kitchen but turns to him eagerly as he pulls her pants down and off and sinks to his knees, slinging one of her legs up over his shoulder.

He’s never done with her. For as long as she wants him, he will never be done.

[hoe4hotchner]

Another idea I have for Hades Hotch & Persephone Reader also has them blending in with humans with Hotch still being the Unit Chief and Reader being a botanist, but this time the rest of the BAU team are also Greek Gods.

Hotch and reader are the only ones who remember being gods, and like to discuss the others and whether they'll remember being gods too, and poke fun at the different relationships the team has compared to their old lives.

The gods I have in mind for each member are:

Reid — Athena

Morgan — Ares

JJ — Hera

Rossi — Zeus

Penelope — Hermes or Aphrodite

Emily — Artemis

You can change them if you think another Greek god fits them

Imposters | [A.H]

Pairing: Hades!Hotch x Persephone!reader | WC: 1.0k | CW: loss and longing, exile and punishment, kind of existential undertones, melancholic tone.

A/N: I changed Reid to Apollo based on a moodboard series that @h0tchnr made a few years ago.

The first time you and Aaron sat down for coffee after another day at the Quantico headquarters, it had been beneath a planter overflowing with marigolds and ivy. The symbolism wasn’t lost on you—bright blooms and creeping vines thriving in the shadow of the lord of the underworld. It was almost poetic, if not a little on the nose.

Mortals might have called it fate, but you knew better. Fate, as the Fates themselves would tell you, was rarely so subtle.

You cradled your mug in your hands, the warmth soothing against your skin, but your mind drifted. The gods may have been scattered, their power diminished, but remnants of their true selves clung stubbornly to their human forms. You saw it in the flash of Penelope’s dazzling smile, in Emily’s ferocity, in the way Derek strode into a room as if it were a battlefield waiting to be won.

“Do you think Morgan’s figured it out yet?” you asked, tearing your gaze from the window, where Derek and Penelope laughed together like soldiers who’d just won a great victory.

Aaron’s dark eyes followed yours, his expression as still and unreadable as the River Styx—oh, how you missed accompanying Charon on his boat occasionally. “Ares?” He took a slow sip of his coffee. “Not likely. He’s too busy trying to win over Aphrodite to notice why he’s so drawn to conflict.”

You couldn’t suppress a grin. “She’s entirely too charming for her own good. Then again, Aphrodite always was.”

“Charm has always been her weapon of choice,” Aaron replied, his voice low, almost reverent.

Your laughter filled the space between you, light and melodic. For a moment, it felt like you were back in another life, in another world. One where your throne was surrounded by endless fields of flowers, and his by the shadowed expanse of his realm. But this was the mortal world, where you were no longer Persephone, Queen of the Underworld, and he was no longer Hades, its ruler.

Still, you both remembered.

“She’s not the only one,” you mused, your gaze shifting to Spencer, who was absorbed in a book across the room. “Reid might piece it together eventually. Apollo’s curiosity will get the better of him. It always does.” Aaron chuckled quietly, a rare sound that felt like it was meant only for you. “Apollo always fancied himself all-knowing, but even he can be blind to the obvious. He’s human now, just like the rest of them.”

That was the cruelest truth of it all. The others didn’t remember. They lived their mortal lives, echoing their divine personalities, oblivious to the power and grandeur they once held. And you and Aaron? You sat in silence, watching it all unfold.

Your eyes drifted to Emily, standing apart from the others with her arms crossed, her gaze sharp and watchful. Artemis, goddess of the hunt, protector of maidens, and champion of independence. She carried herself with the same fierce grace she always had, though she was unaware of it now.

“Do you ever think we should tell them?” you asked softly, your words barely audible.

Aaron didn’t answer right away. Instead, he watched the others, his gaze lingering on Rossi—Zeus himself, laughing boisterously as though his thunder still rumbled—and JJ, her poised demeanor a quiet testament to her role as Hera.

“And what would that change?” he asked at last, his voice steady but tinged with the gravity of someone who had borne the weight of a throne. Who knew the issues it would cause. “We were exiled for a reason.”

You nodded, though the ache in your chest remained. Whatever crime led to the gods’ fall, it was severe enough to shatter Olympus and scatter its rulers among mortals. Now you lived among them, stripped of your divine power, haunted by memories of what once was.

Still, in the chaos of this second life, you’d found each other. As always. Aaron’s hand brushed against yours, his touch grounding you. “We have each other. That’s enough,” he murmured, his voice carrying the weight of an oath made long ago.

“For now,” you replied, your smile bittersweet.

But as you watched the others, their mortal facades wearing thin under the weight of their forgotten divinity, you couldn’t help but wonder: How much longer would they remain in the dark? And when they finally remembered, would the mortal world survive the return of the gods and their wrath?

The next time it happened, it was late afternoon. The sun hung low in the sky, casting shadows over the city streets. You and Aaron had taken a detour from your usual route home, walking past the row of shops where the scent of fresh bread mingled with the distant scent of fresh-cut grass.

Then you saw it—just for a split second, a dog running across the sidewalk, its movements eerily familiar. The way it barked and wagged its tail, the way its fur shone in the golden light. You froze.

Aaron noticed your stillness immediately, his eyes narrowing. “What is it?”

You blinked, but the image of that dog remained—its three heads swirling in your mind like a forgotten dream. Cerberus, once your companion, now reduced to this—an ordinary canine in a world where gods had no power.

Your heart sank. “Do you think we’ll ever find him?” you asked quietly, your voice trembling ever so slightly.

Aaron’s brow furrowed as he followed your gaze, the intensity of his thoughts mirrored in his eyes. He placed a gentle hand on your shoulder, his thumb brushing over the fabric of your jacket. “I’m working on it,” he said, his voice steady despite the sadness in his gaze. “But a three-headed dog turned into a single-headed one is not so easy to track down. Especially when he doesn’t even know he’s ours anymore.”

You swallowed hard, the ache in your chest spreading. “He was always so loyal. To you. To us.” Cerberus had always been more than just a guardian. He had been a symbol of your connection to the Underworld—loyal, protective, and steadfast. He had been your first real friend when you had arrived in the underworld. And now, like everything else, he was lost.

“We’ll find him,” Aaron promised, his voice carrying the weight of the oaths he’d made. “We always do.”

You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding and nodded again. Maybe the gods had been cast down, but you and Aaron—Persephone and Hades—would never stop searching for the ones you’d lost.

[semisasseater]

ᴄʜ-ᴄʜ-ᴄʜ-ᴄʜ-ᴄʜᴇʀɪsʜ ᴍʏ ʟᴏᴠᴇ !!

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childhood!best friend se-mi x fem! reader

Summary: you had the biggest crush on your childhood best friend the biggest, so what happens when you accidentally ask if you can kiss her when you were thinking about it?

Tw: fluff, pillow fights, romance tension, jealousy, wuh luh wuh, very little suggestive things, very very little angst ig if you squint, reader is just down bad.

authors note: ahh i really wanna become a writer now!! i hope you’ll like this though because my mind was BLANK butttttt any tips or suggestions or requests would be great!

Not proofread!

Word count: 576

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“Would it be okay if I kissed you?”

“What?”

Your head spun as you tried to process how you ended up in this situation.

You had a crush on Se-mi—a huge one—for as long as you could remember. Ever since elementary school, you admired her, but you always tried to brush it off as simple friendliness. After all, you were both girls. What if she wasn’t into girls? What if she never saw you as someone she could date?

Those questions lingered in your mind for years. The first was answered when she started dating a girl in eighth grade. You’d felt an unexpected surge of rage and jealousy when you saw them together. You wished more than anything to be in her girlfriend’s place, but life didn’t work that way. Now, years later, you were both in college, yet your feelings hadn’t faded. If anything, they’d grown stronger.

Every time another girl tried to flirt with Se-mi, your jealousy would flare up. You’d lie and tell people the two of you were dating or convince her not to hook up with them. Se-mi never questioned it. She always listened to you. Why? You didn’t know. Maybe it was because you were her best friend—or maybe, just maybe, she felt the same way you did.

“Se-mi can you help me with this math problem?” you whined, sprawled out on her bed with your face buried in her pillows.

She walked over, smiling as she ran her fingers through her messy hair. Plopping onto the bed beside you, she scooted closer and glanced at your laptop screen, giggling.

“Wow you really don’t know this?” she teased.

“Shut up! You know I’m terrible at math” you retorted, grabbing the pillow you’d been lying on and swatting her with it.

Laughing, she tried to block your attacks. “O-okay okay! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” she said between bursts of laughter.

But instead of stopping, she grabbed a pillow and swung back. What started as a playful hit turned into a full-blown pillow fight, the room filling with the sound of laughter and giggles.

Eventually, you tackled her, pinning her down and crawling over her as you both laughed breathlessly. Exhausted, you flopped onto her lap, resting your head against her shoulder. Her arms instinctively wrapped around your waist, holding you close.

Your thoughts wandered as her warmth surrounded you.

“Would it be okay if I kissed you?” you wondered aloud, the words slipping out before you could stop them.

“What?” Se-mi asked, her voice soft but surprised.

Realizing what you’d said, your face flushed a deep red, and you scrambled to sit up. “O-oh my gosh, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to say that! I-I was just—”

You couldn’t finish your sentence. Panic surged through you as you tried to explain yourself, but Se-mi’s grip on your waist tightened. Her free hand cupped your cheek, pulling you closer.

And then she kissed you.

It was deep and passionate, her lips soft and warm against yours, fitting together like two puzzle pieces that had been waiting for this moment. The kiss wasn’t rushed or hesitant; it was filled with unspoken emotions, affection, and love.

When she finally pulled away, your face was flushed a hot pink. She chuckled softly, running her fingers through her hair again, a habit you adored.

“So…” she murmured, pressing a finger to her lips. “How long have you been wanting to kiss me, pretty girl?”

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@semisasseater

[hollyhomburg]

Prey Animals (7)

—  Pairing: Poly Ot7, hoseok x Ot6, Yoongi x reader, Bts x reader,

—  Genre: Omegaverse, Mafia au, Polyamory au, Found family, Suspense, Eventual Smut, enemies to friends to lovers, Healing & Themes of trauma,

—  Summary: In a world where Beta's are rare, valuable, and often have more than one pack; Beta Min Yoongi does everything he can to keep his mafia heritage a secret from his primary pack. Little does he know he's not the only one who's living a double life.

—  Words: 4.7k

—  Warnings: Past Emotional abuse, past psychological abuse, referenced mistreatment, referenced sexual manipulation, breakups, brief homelessness, Hoseok has PTSD, hurt/comfort

—  Check in at the end for my notes on this chapter! — 

(Yoongi, 1 year and 3 months ago)

Yoongi brings Hoseok home one day. Like a little kid would bring home a stray puppy. Apparently, they work together somewhere.

Namjoon and Jin and the others have long stopped asking what Yoongi does for work, used to his cagey answers. But it’s normal as far as beta’s go. Each of them gives Yoongi his space because they understand that all beta’s need it. They’ve all had the same sentiments shoved on them.

Don’t crowd him. At least he comes home. If it was something we needed to know, he’d tell us. He’ll tell you if you really want to know Koo.

Seokjin’s not really surprised that Yoongi does something with music now, that’s always been his first love (before Seokjin of course) he’s always saying this and that, someone showed me this song during work, do you mind if I play it? It’s stuck in my head. And now because of Hoseok- they know why. 

It’s easy to see how a person could get stuck in your head, the same way a favorite song might. Especially when it comes to Hoseok.

It’s the first time they learn of Yoongi’s occupation in nearly a year. The pack tries not to be jealous that Hoseok knows more about what their beta does during the day than they do. That he gets to spend more time with him. Hours and hours the same way that Seokjin used too.

They work at the same record store that gives Yoongi the freedom to make calls in the back (as long as he pays the owner off. As if that’s difficult at all. The owner is just like all the others, and bows to kiss Yoongi’s feet.)

But Hoseok doesn’t know that. Hoseok is just…Yoongi’s friend. Not his best friend yet but by far the person Yoongi likes the best outside of the pack. The only person who knows him that isn’t pack or family.

Hoseok is perplexed that the others don’t even know where Yoongi works. That he’s never shared it with them and that they don't talk about it. But Hoseok has never been in a pack with a beta- so it’s understandable that he doesn’t know.

It's Taehyung that explains it to him weeks later. "It's not that we don't want to know it's just- hyung likes his privacy and you know- he's a beta."

Beta. It's almost a dirty word. Hoseok doesn't like the way that Taehyung says it. Not when Yoongi makes him feel so clean. Hoseok doesn't have the best first impression of Teahyung in general but if Hoseok was being honest, it's mostly because he's jealous. 

Jealousy is hard to admit. Even more when you’re at your lowest.

The day Hoseok meets the rest of the pack is a bad one. Arguably the second worst day of Hoseok's life (the worst day will come a lot later, about 900,000 words from now but you can be patient, can’t you?).

Hoseok doesn’t know what he would have done if Yoongi hadn’t seen him crying on a street corner outside of their workplace. The young alpha looked wrecked- smoking a cigarette with shaking hands and bloodshot eyes. Holding his shoulders oh so carefully. His heart between them aching with fresh wounds. The kind that takes a lifetime to heal.

Yoongi can never leave anyone to wallow- and he gets the story from Hoseok over a warm cup of hot cocoa in the shitty break room. Eyeing the old telephone and begging it not to ring. And the whole time Hoseok feels like he’s drinking down the beta across from him.

Yoongi smells like hot cocoa, warm and comforting. Comfort that he needs desperately right now.

Under Yoongi’s gaze, Hoseok certainly feels like he’s the one being devoured or judged. Like the weighing of the hearts- will Hoseok be able to weigh enough to be loved? Or will Yoongi find him unsatisfactory just like his last pack? Unable to give enough. Undeserving of any and all affection. 

It takes Hoseok a long time to come clean about it, to tell Yoongi what his last pack has done to him. It takes even longer for the beta to understand. Years and years of friendship and love.

But the short answer comes sooner. Yoongi asks him why Hoseok’s pack kicked him out later that night when he’s curling up in the pack’s apartment. Because Hoseok didn’t have another place to stay and Yoongi wasn’t the type of friend to let Hoseok sleep in his car when they’ve got a perfectly good couch. It feels a bit too much like how Seokjin came into his life. But Yoongi keeps his parallels to himself.

Yoongi asks why Hoseok’s pack dumped him out of the blue. Yoongi honestly hasn’t seen one red flag in Hoseok, and Yoongi would know because he’s naturally suspicious of people.  

Jung Hoseok has always seemed nice enough. They’ve worked together for a few months now. Their banter over records and cd's and old sound systems that honestly weren't worth much is as good as his banter with Jin. His opinions on 90's rap are a little pedestrian sure, but they've both bonded over their mutual love of music quite a bit over the last few months. Enough to be friends. 

"In another life, I think I could have been a producer."

"Really? You strike me more as a dancer." Yoongi had rewarded him with a shitty impression of the worm and in turn, Hoseok had rewarded Yoongi with a bright laugh that's almost better than 99% of the music he's ever listened to.

Almost- he still thinks Stick Season is a perfect album. 

Hoseok is basically homeless. Functionally homeless. He’d be sleeping in his car tonight if it wasn’t for Yoongi. He’s a deadbeat alpha without a pack to call his own. A lone wolf if ever there was one. This morning, just this morning he’d woken up to the apartment empty. Everything but the bed gone. The walls vacant of pictures and the hallways silent of laughter. The lease expired; the keys handed over. Alone and on his own and without a place to sleep tonight.

But thankfully, not for long. Yoongi had found him crying in the rain outside of the record store, dragged him inside, and that was that.

Yoongi’s pack has been so kind to him. Kinder than he deserves, offering a place to stay after a short phone call. Yoongi’s phone lighting up across that small table in the breakroom with approval and invitation’s that Hoseok is almost too insecure to accept. Almost.

But he does need a place to stay.

Standing in the doorway of the pack’s apartment. He shouts apologies and thank you’s to anyone who will listen while two of Yoongi’s packmates help carry in his boxes and the other three finish clearing a corner of their spare bedroom for him. (Hoseok does deserve it, it's just his stupid and shitty internal monologue that has him convinced otherwise.)

They set him up in his own space down the hall from the pack’s bedroom. Half a reading room with a cot and the other side occupied by an honestly massive pile of clothes. Hoseok doesn’t mind- it smells good in here. Like their fresh-smelling fabric softener but also a little bit like the inside of a sweet shop with how sugary everyone smells. 

Not like his scent, his old pack mates had always told him he smelled like sugar burning, caramel, Heavy on the burn. 

Hoseok has maybe three plastic bins full of clothes to his name that act as a side table to the single bed. Apparently one of Yoongi’s alphas (the one who smells like cinnamon and pepper) likes to stay up late and read in here instead of keeping his pack mates up with a reading light. Ownership of this space has easily been transferred to Hoseok. They’d made this small space for him. Although the books were taken out regardless of Hoseok's mutable protests not to make a fuss for him. He didn’t need much space.

Hoseok can’t remember the alpha's name or remember if he’d even heard it. They’d called him darling so much that it might just as well have been his name. Jealousy chafes and Hoseok's never been a good enough alpha to receive that kind of affection. He’s never earned that kind of pet name. 

It had been a bit of a slap in the face to see the two omegas treat that alpha with such a kind hand, ruffling his head and loosening his tie for him. Being tactile with him in a way that Hoseok had only ever dared to dream about. Now he and Yoongi sit on the edge of the small bed that smells like that alpha; an appropriate distance away on the too-fluffy blanket and Hoseok- Hoseok just feels so touch starved it hurts.

He won’t get casual affection like the other alpha did, least of all from Yoongi. He’s the beta- the desirable one. Maybe in the next life he can be reborn as a beta, so he’ll get that easy affection. It seems only right when he’d been denied it so much in this life. Hoseok has had the hope burned out of him; he doesn’t have much faith in this this- that things could change enough to accommodate what he wants.

Yoongi’s eyes are warm in the half-light, so warm even if the question is so cold.

"Why did they dump you anyway?" 

Hoseok’s hands play with the blanket, thick and fluffy. “I don’t think they ever really wanted me, just an alpha.”

“All omega’s?”

“Yeah,” Yoongi sighs.

It’s hard to admit when Hoseok had tried so futilely to earn their love for so many years. But he vomits out the words now, begging Yoongi to understand. “As long as one of them wasn’t in heat they basically just ignored me. They’d make me go on suppressants for my rut so that I didn’t have them, but they were making me sick. When I told them I wanted to go off of them and spend my rut with them- they cut me off- and said no one would want to deal with an alpha who has ruts as bad as mine. That I was asking for too much.” The tremble in Hoseok’s hands is a near thing, covered by Yoongi’s and a reassuring squeeze. “I just wish they’d done it directly instead of leaving a note.”

Yoongi looks nearly breathless. “They didn’t have the balls to tell you to your face?”

“No, and remember, all omega’s.”

Yoongi rolls his tongue against the inside of his teeth, it feels…special, and important. Having someone angry on his behalf. Hoseok hasn’t had anyone angry for him and not at him in a long long time.

“What a bunch of assholes.”

A day ago, Hoseok would have defended them, now, he’s just silent.

Internally, Yoongi snorts and thinks that no one's ruts can be worse than Jimin’s. He still has bruises from the last time- hickeys shaped like a literal heart on his happy trail hidden by his thick sweater. But he has more pressing issues right now as he watches the gentle tears drift down Hoseok’s cheeks. Hoseok’s hands tighten on the coverlet.

“Hyung, was I? Was I asking for too much?”

Hoseok sees Yoongi’s jaw roll again, and the beta goes from smelling like chocolate to smelling like the ocean entirely, the sweetness dimming. Yoongi smells like the ocean at night when he's angry, salt and hidden brine. So at odds with his chocolate scent. So opposite. Beta's always smell a little despondent. Their happy and sad scents never match up. Hoseok’s almost sorry he asked.

“No Hobi. You weren’t asking for too much at all.”

Yoongi pulls Hoseok’s head to rest against his shoulder. Letting him stay there until Hoseok’s tears have dried and his sobs have become little hiccups.

That night Hoseok sees the two omegas kiss each of their pack mates on the forehead. They spend special time with the pack alpha. They linger in the hallway outside of the spare bedroom, door open because it’s not Hoseok’s door to close. Completely aware that he’s there, that he’s watching, and yet the pack alpha does nothing about it.

He- Namjoon- is a happy sandwich between the two omegas’, with a hand on either side of their waists. He smiles good-naturedly at Hobi from the doorway and tells him he can stay as long as he wants too.

Wants too, not needs. Namjoon is very careful with his words. Generous with them.

Hoseok doesn’t understand why they’re treating him so well. Namjoon’s alpha instincts must be screaming at him to not let a stranger get close to his omegas or his pups (he’s heard him, and his omega refer to the three youngest as such- it’s an affectionate title, similar to calling someone ‘baby’).

It would be natural for them to feel uncomfortable with a stranger in their den. But Hoseok never senses any distaste from Namjoon nor from the other two alphas- Taehyung (darling) and Jimin.

Hoseok hardly sleeps that night, tossing and turning, nose itching from all the new scents echoing from down the hall. He gives up sometime after 4 am, quieting the restlessness in his bones in the one way he knows how.

By being useful.

Namjoon usually wakes up first. He has to be at the hospital by 7 am for his shift and waking up early has always been difficult for the alpha. He almost walks into the wall, the thud resonating in their apartment. Blinking dimly when he looks at the spread stretched out before them on the dining room table tucked into the corner of the kitchen. Hoseok smiles and finishes wiping off the counters with a beaming smile.

He hopes it’s enough. 

“Good morning! I hope you don’t mind but I wanted to show you how much I appreciate you letting me sleep here- I’m not the best cook but breakfast is my-” Hoseok’s smile fades when he takes in Namjoon’s wide eyes. The alpha blinks away his sleepiness in the doorway. Before rubbing at his eyes like what he’s seeing can’t possibly be real. “Specialty…”

Hoseok is panicked, all but ringing his hands. “Of course you don’t like it- oh my god did I overstep? I’m sorry pack alpha I know this is your den I shouldn’t have been so-”

  Stupid . Hoseok had fucked up. Again. He’s barely been here for 18 hours. Must be some sort of record.

Before Namjoon can answer Seokjin stumbles out of the bedroom nearly hip-checking Namjoon. Not expecting the alpha to be just standing there dumbly. He’s pretty tall for an omega. Both of them a bit uncoordinated especially half asleep. Namjoon almost trips, Seokjin catches him. “Don’t bump into any more walls I’ve got you I’ll make coffee in a second just let me-” he blinks too, stopping. 

Hoseok has made Omurice and cinnamon toast with sugar. A plate of poached eggs and a bowl of cut bananas and strawberries. Creamy hollandaise sauce too. Pancake batter is in the works, the coffee pot already gurgling. Ready to be pipped out at request. And the dishes, the dishes are already done and on the drying rack. The table set for seven people.

Hoseok even had time to water Tae's plants. a plant collection that will nearly triple in size in the next few years because Namjoon won’t be able to resist giving them to Hobi. A gentle alpha. An alpha like him- that likes to see things grow. There will be bonsai trees and cyclamens and itty-bitty orchids from trader joes. Everything that grows will point to Hoseok. Like a sunflower tilting in the direction of the sun.

“I have a bit of a green thumb. I hope you don’t mind. I noticed your pithos was a bit dry.” Seokjin can’t help but look at Hoseok and think that taking care of things for someone is it’s own special type of flirting.

Dimly, Seokjin remembers last night, quiet questions over dinner, “do you like to cook Hoseok-shii?”

“Not really, I’m really good at making breakfast foods but everything else is sort of out of my depth omega-shii. If you want, I can do the dishes?”

“Please, call me Hyung, everyone else does, and the dishes can wait for the morning. You’ve had a tough day, you deserve some rest.”

The two of them blink and blink at Hoseok stunned that the alpha has made them a full breakfast. And did it so quietly. None of them are heavy sleepers (besides Yoongi and Jungkook) Namjoon doesn’t know how he didn’t hear anything. 

The alpha is quiet, stealthy almost. And Jin’s heart hurts when he thinks of why that might be. Even now, the alpha struggles to meet Jin’s eyes. He doesn’t have the same problem with meeting Namjoon’s.

Seokjin all but pushed the pack alpha in his direction.

A few minutes later Hoseok tries to hide his shy smile as Namjoon and Seokjin both let out simply pornographic moans at the taste of Hoseok’s food. Sitting on either side of him, Namjoon piles his plate high with food. “I'm only really good with breakfast food, I can’t make anything else.” But neither of them seems to hear him. Seokjin pouts down at Hoseok, a little bit of runny egg yellowing the corner of his mouth. Narrowing his eyes.

“Can we keep you?” 

Namjoon's words are muffled by the 6th pancake of the morning, hunched over his plate. "phfuck off he's phmine." 

Hoseok falls into their pack easily. It's not all romantic at first.

He walks with Tae home and helps Jimin with the laundry. He cooks breakfast and wears Seokjin’s apron and helps do the dishes. He likes being helpful. He goes on runs with Jungkook every morning to keep an eye on him- in case he has an episode while he’s running. He’s the only one who can really keep up with the youngest. He’s the one who has the idea of getting Jungkook a smartwatch to track his heart rate and therefore his seizures. All of them connect their phones to the app and check-in. Especially when they don’t want to bug Jungkook but still want to make sure their precious youngest omega is okay.

Even if Hoseok is wary of omegas in general given his history; he’d never let the younger suffer through it alone.

Yoongi’s only known Hoseok for a couple of months and still- He’s the jumpiest alpha that Yoongi’s ever met. He puts Jimin to shame (Jimin’s job keeps him so on edge, the tenseness that he only loosens when he comes home). Flinching especially around Seokjin and Jungkook. But every inch of him goes calm when Yoongi is in the room.

Yoongi had noticed the same thing in the record store.

The Flinching, the tentativeness, the fear that lurks underneath Hoseok’s skin. That only points to one thing. Hoseok checks his phone obsessively the first few weeks but then less as time goes on and Yoongi thinks good.

Good, they didn’t deserve you.

Hoseok never brings up any physical abuse that he might have suffered at the hands of his old packmates. Hoseok won't even say their names, still too trauma-ridden that all he can say is ‘this one’ or ‘that one’ or ‘the pack omega’ when Yoongi asks him about his old pack. Usually on their late-night drives when their hands tangle over the center console and Hoseok feels safe enough to talk about them. 

He'll feel safe enough to talk about them with the others too eventually, but it takes baby steps to incorporate him into the pack. He still can't even say their names and after the first few months as they fade from relevancy, Yoongi doesn’t ask.

All in all, that’s probably a good thing, Yoongi had half a mind to track them down and orchestrate some sort of accident for them otherwise. But if you could manage to hurt a person like Hoseok, as sunshiny and as genuinely good as he is, they must be twice the monsters that Yoongi is. It’s probably for the best that Hoseok never mentions them by name.

Names have weight.

At work, The record store owner’s beady eyes flicker from Yoongi to Hoseok. He notices when they start to come and go from the shop together. And he starts to sync their shifts. Anything to keep someone from the Min family happy. Maybe Yoongi would carry that good opinion back to his grandfather and lead to better business. Yoongi knows the owners motives and as much as he hates to admit it- It’s nice to lean into Hoseok on their walk to the subway, to sit close and share a pair of earbuds while they scroll through some YouTube videos.

He and Hoseok have a lot of the same interests. But as time goes on- Yoongi starts to get a little worried about Hoseok’s proximity to Yoongi’s job- the one he doesn’t talk about with anyone in his pack. Hoseok just assumes he does acquisitions and inventory for the store owner, which is why he’s constantly ducking into the backroom whenever the old phone rings.

It was the same way at the coffee shop, but Hoseok and Seokjin never knew to compare notes.

Sometimes the family needs more from him than a simple phone call, and Hoseok is too close to it now. It’s easy to lie even if Yoongi hates lying to his packmates. He tells Seokjin that he has to work and tells Hoseok that he doesn’t. And it’s easy to slip away. 

Usually, Yoongi finds himself at a hotel or to a different part of the city, far away from his packmates. Yoongi hates meeting in person but sometimes it can’t be avoided. Often times the rooms he enters are too fine and expensive for his tastes. Chandeliers dripping with diamonds and fine velvet interiors at odds with his ripped jeans and old band t-shirts that make him feel wholly out of place. 

Yoongi’s conducted these meetings in so many places, in the back of limousines, the back rooms of bars and clubs, a pool on top of the city's most expensive apartment complex, and even once an underground bunker. Anywhere and everywhere. It helps that most people are willing to travel for him- since Yoongi is firm on his decision to not leave his city.

The secretaries at this hotel eye his appearance like he’s nothing but street trash. Which, granted, he is. But he’s beta street trash and that makes all the difference.

“The reservation should be under Min.”

That gives them a start usually, a subtle widening of eyes, hands fumbling for the phone to call the hotel director.

“I take it they’re already expecting me?” 

On the days that Yoongi actually tends to his day job, he does a good job keeping an eye on the record store owner. If only because Hoseok has such a proximity to him. Yoongi’s noticed whenever the owner comes into work a lot more people frequent the store. And he’s seen him slip small bags of white powder into the sleeves of records before. But Yoongi knows how to keep quiet about that sort of thing. And Hoseok has so much on his plate that he never notices.

The rest of his pack doesn’t mind stepping around Hoseok when it’s clear he’s having a bad day. They come less frequently as time goes on and soon, he feels just as comfortable curling up with the omegas as he does with the alphas. But the adjustment is slow, he meets Jin’s eyes only sometimes. Sidesteps Jungkook’s teasing. Bows under the weight of Namjoon’s hand on his shoulder.

The adjustment is slow but noticeable. He play wrestles with Jimin, with Taehyung. Ducks his head under Jin’s fussing but doesn’t out right reject it. He takes the packed lunch and a sleepy scent mark without gnashing his teeth and growling. Far from it- he blushes.

But the first time they invite him into their nest Hoseok looks like they’ve just doused him with a bucket of icy water.

“I’ve never been in a nest before, at least not outside of a heat." Jungkook flinches, and Jin hisses. Hoseok pales before Jin’s had the chance to realize his mistake. But still, the border gets pushed back. And Hoseok waits. Taking one step closer than anther before he gently puts a knee on the border.

It hurts them that he sits in it- rim rod straight. Worried that he’s going to be booted out of it for messing up the edge or accidently spreading his scent in it. But Seokjin and Jungkook just surround him with their favorite nest-making items and sit chest-to-chest with him. Hoseok shivers with every easily given touch. Through his hair, over his shoulders, on his scent glands round and pudgy at his neck. Jungkook kisses into his mouth soft and sweet. 

“Love it when our nest smells like you Hoseokie.” 

It takes them a while- but eventually, he opens up to the others about his old pack. How poorly they treated him. He names specifics that have Jin hiding his mouth, that have Namjoon’s hands tightening on the back of the chairs. That make Jimin grit his teeth and growl. That have Tae folding his book and tossing it to the side in favor of pulling him in.

To them, he’d been an add-on- nothing special. The only alpha in a group of four female omegas.

Comparatively, their pack feels more balanced now with two alphas for each omega. When Jungkook and Seokjin’s heats eventually come he’s very happy to take the lowest spot in their hierarchy even though he’s the oldest alpha. He doesn’t know how to be a good alpha he says (though he’s never done anything wrong) Namjoon needs to show him.

But it’s just reassurance that Hoseok needs and that’s easily given. Hoseok is so honestly happy to please. 

He’s everything to them- the most special and desired person in their beds and in their lives. Jung Hoseok is the one to wake them up with coffee in the morning, and also the one who tries to say every night, “you don’t have to do this, really guys I’m good.” Even when they know having his back rubbed is his favorite way to fall asleep. They pet his hair until the touch-starved shivers subside into happy grumbles, the alpha version of an omega purr. They love how shivery and cutely hazy he gets when they shower him in affection.

Things are good, for a while- they're so so so good. Things get so good that Hoseok almost forgets.

Almost.

~-~

(Yoongi, 124 days before).

But someone always leaves, someone has to go first- it’s just the way things are.

They just never expected it to be Yoongi.

It happens when Yoongi least expects it, after a group date with the seven of them. It's probably the last truly warm day of the summer, warm enough that it has them all escaping on a Sunday to go to the ocean again- Hoseok's favorite place. The sand sticks to Yoongi's bare feet. His ankles are cold. Fall is just on the horizon. Not far now.

Yoongi's phone rings and he walks away from their big picnic blanket to take the call. Jimin’s laugh rings in his ears, almost drowning out the sound of the ocean and the person on the other side of the phone.

Hearing fluent unaccented Korean is so jarring through the speaker that Yoongi almost misses it. He's so used to Jimin's slight drawl, Seokjin's crisp syllables, the way that Taehyung sounds as he flips from English to Korean and back again words and grammar all tangled.

He'd forgotten what his family sounds like when they talk.

“Harabeoji is dead.”

Yoongi's blood goes cold, and his hands start to shake. They don’t say anything else before they hang up, but they don’t need to. The message is clear. Yoongi is well trained. Yoongi is a good pup, a good beta. He knows to come when called.

“What is it Yoongi? Is everything alright?” 

Yoongi schools his face into a neutral expression while his pulse roars in his ears as he turns around. “I’m perfectly fine Jinnie. Nothing is wrong.” He lies effortlessly. The words couldn’t be further from the truth. 

(Sometimes, people leave not because they want to- but because they have to).

~-~

(Read the first Version of this story Here)

Notes:

- Honestly this is another chapter where the title??? Why am I even bothering with chapter titles??? I mean I love them but half of them are! Not right and I don’t know how to fix it (yet) I feel like this chapter being the bumblebee chapter is too on the nose. (edit, I did actually go back and change this just a few days later.)

- Reading this I’m reminded that everything is up to interpretation. And I think because we see this scene again a lot later in this story. this is what happened from Yoongi’s perspective and later- that’s from Hobi's pov you know?.Just trust me if you look at them next to each other it makes sense that this one you’re seeing right now is a biased view.

- Some of Hoseok’s chapter feels a little bit fanfictiony, but I don’t hate it, like I think that I’m trying to hit somewhere in the middle of a published book and a fanfic, it doesn’t need to be one or the other right now.

[delugyu]

thinking about bsf gyu (specifically your take on him) and he’s like pecking your lips “playfully” in hopes that maybe you kiss back (you never do) and all your friends hate him cause he’s so bad for you ughhhh love me a toxic possessive bsf

GAHHHHHHH THIS IS SO GOOD.. 😵‍💫😵‍💫

(warnings: manipulation, kinda suggestive?)

best friend beomgyu who knows no boundaries… his hands linger in places that aren’t so friendly, his eyes trail over you with more heat than what friendship allows… but you always dismiss his actions and shrug it off as him being clingy.

his lips on your skin isn’t an entirely unfamiliar feeling. he’ll take your hand and kiss the back of it, and you meet his eyes to see a wide smile already adorning his face. how could you tell him off when he looks at you like that? he’ll wrap his arm around you during a movie night and turn to peck your cheek, completely unphased. the first time it happens, you try desperately to fight the heat that threatens to take over your face. you tell yourself this is normal, this is beomgyu. he’s just like that sometimes.

he starts getting braver, letting his hand rest so far up your thigh you’re scared to move and accidentally push him towards your center. his kisses to your cheek move closer and closer to your lips, but you don’t dare turn your head to reject his affections. his arm brings you closer and closer to him, until eventually you’re halfway onto his lap, legs thrown over his own and body pressed tight into his side.

the first time he places a peck against your lips, you can’t control the way your eyes bug out. all he does is laugh at your display of confusion, patting your head and calling you cute. the two of you were in public—not a very crowded place, but public nonetheless. you try to control the way your heart hammers against your chest. this is beomgyu. this is normal.

it’s not a one-time thing. the action follows into your homes, into your friend dates, into the car, truly anywhere beomgyu wants—but what’s most horrifying is when he does it in front of your friends.

“are you two dating now?” your friends ask you. you get texts and calls piling in, even from friends who weren’t at the stupid party with you and beomgyu. it’s a chore having to explain your dynamic to everyone, because no one believes you. no one thinks that beomgyu’s behavior is just friendly, no one thinks he’s being sweet or cute. it leaves you second guessing your friendship.

beomgyu’s offended when you bring it up to him. who are they to dictate what’s right and wrong in your relationship? they don’t know him like you do. you shouldn’t listen to them, they don’t get it. why do you even need them anyway? they’re just trying to split you apart.

you’re so unsure of everything now. your friends are adamant that this is weird, that he’s taking things too far. beomgyu is persistent in promising you everything’s okay, and even more persistent in telling you to stop listening to what everyone else is telling you.

“how about you just stop hanging out with them?” he suggests one day. “all they’re doing is making you confused. wasn’t it easier before they all came in convincing you of things that aren’t true?”

you don’t know. you feel like you’re in the middle of a tug of war, being pulled to either side, but you’re threatening to split now. you guess you should make a choice; it’s pretty clear you can’t have both beomgyu and your other friends in your life.

“if i stop hanging out with them, then i’d only have you,” you say. he doesn’t seem to find anything wrong with that. he takes your hands and pulls you close.

“is that a problem?” he asks in a whisper. you can feel his breath on your face as he speaks.

you know you can’t say the wrong thing here. he wouldn’t react well to anything other than the answer he’s expecting. “no,” you say.

he smiles at that, pressing a kiss to your lips. he got what he wanted, but he’s frowning when he looks at you again.

“what?” you ask, eyes darting between his, trying to find the issue.

“you never kiss me back,” he says. his frown doesn’t leave his face.

“i’m sorry.” you don’t know what else to say. his hand cups your face, thumb brushing your cheek. he doesn’t conceal the longing or the hurt in his eyes. it pangs your heart.

“do you think it’s wrong?” he asks. you blink at him in confusion. “for me to kiss you?”

you try not to feel so nervous, but you can’t help the way you tense up a bit. he gives you an illusion of choice: if you say no, he’ll be happy, but if you say yes, he’ll be upset and pester you.

you look away and choose to not say anything. he grabs your waist and pulls you closer until you’re flush against him. your eyes land on his face again in shock.

you don’t get very long to question his action when his lips are on yours again the next second. you pull your head back and place a hand on his face to keep him from lunging at you again.

“everyone told me it was wrong,” you answer finally.

“are you them? or are you your own person?” he asks. he’s losing his patience, his eyes hold his irritation.

you pout. “i’m my own person…”

“that’s right. only we get to decide what we do as friends,” he spits out the last word as if it holds some sort of derogatory connotation. his mouth finds your jaw, and you gasp.

he pulls away to continue, “so this is okay… right?” he places a kiss on your neck.

you gulp and nod. you don’t want to argue with your best friend. “yes.”

[willowsnook]

sweet sister (18+)

You can make one with Lance x Ocon reader. She is Esteban's sister but she never participated much in the races and which she was Lance didn't pay much attention to her. But now he is newly single is invited to Esteban's birthday and finds her and ends up rolling a mood. Then they have a relationship hidden from the media and families but being discovered later, some interaction of Lance and Esteban being brothers-in-law!!

Lance stroll x ocon!sister

—----------------------------------------------------------

“Happy birthday, Estie,” you cheered as you found your brother talking with Flavy in his kitchen, with a drink in his hand. 

“Thanks sis,” Esteban replied warmly. He was hosting a small party at his Swiss apartment to celebrate and you were happy to finally get time off of work to make the trip this weekend. You had thrown on a casual fit with an oversized cardigan in your favorite shade of blue and were ready to let off a little steam. 

“Come on Flavy,” you said, pulling your brother’s girlfriend away to the outdoor patio area. She giggled as you dragged her, and the cool air had you clutching your outer layer when you finally made it. 

“So what’s new?” She asked, sinking down on one of the outdoor couches, resting her feet on the patio table. You joined her, not letting go of your glass of wine. 

“Not a lot. Work is boring, but there is a chance that I’ll get to start being remote,” you said excitedly. You were a data analyst and while you enjoyed being in the office, you wanted to live the nomad traveling life while you were young. So being able to be remote would be perfect. 

“Wait does that mean you’ll come to more races,” she asked, her eyes wide. She squealed as you nodded. “Thank god, I’ve been so bored.”

“You hang out with Kika, though right?” You asked.

“Yeah, but she’s been hanging around with Alex more which is fine, but then I get lonely. And now that Lance and Marilou broke up, there really isn’t anyone else I’m friends with.”

“Oh yeah, I heard about that,” you said. “A couple of months ago right?” 

“Yeah,” she said giving you a teasing look. “Trying to swoop in?” 

“Esteban would kill me,” you muttered with a small laugh. 

You didn’t even know Lance that well, but something about him intrigued you. By the time him and Esteban had gotten close you were already in college so you weren’t even 100% sure if he remembered who you were. 

“He’s nice,” Flavy said thoughtfully. “I think he gets a bad rep because of who he is but he’s always been a sweetheart to me.” 

“Didn’t he cheat on Marilou, though,” you asked, thinking back to the gossip account’s post you had seen. 

“I don’t think so,” she answered. “To my knowledge, they had been broken up a while before the media knew so the girl they referenced was post-break.” 

“Ahh,” you said. Turning your head to look back inside you saw the man himself, talking to your brother and some others in the living room. Dressed in all black he managed to look casual but still put together. 

As you watched Lance through the glass doors, he suddenly looked up and caught your gaze. For a moment, your eyes locked, and you felt a flutter in your stomach. You quickly looked away, feeling your cheeks heat up.

"Ooh, someone's blushing," Flavy teased, nudging you with her elbow.

"Shut up," you muttered, taking a large sip of your wine.

Just then, the sliding door opened, and Esteban stepped out onto the patio. "Hey, stop hiding out here and come join the party.” 

You and Flavy exchanged a glance before standing up. As you followed your brother back inside, you couldn't help but steal another look at Lance. To your surprise, he was still watching you, a small smile playing on his lips.

Throughout the evening, you found yourself gravitating towards Lance. You chatted with some of Esteban’s old friends and eventually found yourself beside him. 

“It’s been a while,” he said, breaking the ice between you. His eyes lingered on your body before he brought them back up to your eyes, a small smirk on his face. 

“It has,” you agreed, trying to act casual. “Tough season so far?”

“Already busting my balls?” He snorted, leaning back against the wall. 

“Someone has to,” you teased. As nervous as you were to talk to him, it all seemed to melt away now that you finally were. “You aren’t in the bottom five of the grid though, so I guess that’s a good sign.”

“Only a matter of time,” he mumbled, and you caught a flash of dejection on his face that he tried to brush off. 

“The car or you?” You asked gently. Having been around your brother’s racing career, you knew that was usually what it boiled down to. 

“A little bit of both,” he admitted. “The car isn’t great which is resulting in me not being confident which makes for easy mistakes.” 

You nodded sympathetically. "That must be frustrating. I'm sure you'll find your groove again soon, though."

Lance gave you a small smile, his eyes softening. "Thanks. It's nice to talk to someone who gets it."

You felt a warmth spread through your chest at his words. "Well, I've been around racing my whole life. It's hard not to pick up on a few things."

"Thanks, that means a lot. You know, I always wondered why we never really got to know each other before."

"Probably because I was always busy with school when you and Esteban started hanging out," you replied, suddenly very aware of how close you were. “I’m surprised you recognized me.” 

"Well, I'm glad I did," Lance said, his voice lowering slightly as he leaned in closer.

Your breath caught in your throat at his proximity. You could smell his cologne, a subtle but intoxicating woodsy scent. You were too caught up in his intense stare to see your brother coming towards you.

“Hey guys,” he said, shooting Lance a warning look. You instantly stood back and blushed, looking anywhere but the man before you. “Flavy and I are hungry, you in for late-night dinner?”

Looking around, you realized that everyone had filtered out. Lance agreed to food and you found yourself nodding along as well. The four of you called a ride to a nearby restaurant that Lance had called, asking them to stay open. Esteban sat in the front with the rest of you in the back; you being in the middle meant you were pushed alongside Lance, making you flush. 

Pulling up to the spot, he got out and held his hand out for you to help. His big hand enveloped yours and he held on for an extra couple of seconds before you shot him a curious look. 

Late night dinner was a great move, and conversation flowed as the four of you enjoyed being the only ones there. You had missed your brother a lot. A couple of hours later you were dead and watched as Esteban and Flavy got into a car back to his place. You were staying in a hotel, so Lance insisted on waiting for your car with you, to make sure you were safe. 

“Are we going to go another few years without seeing each other?” He asked and you smiled. 

“I hope not,” you said. “I’m going to try to be in Austin.” 

“That would be good, I can get you an Aston garage pass,” he said. 

“Not sure how Esteban would feel about that,” you teased. 

Lance chuckled, his eyes twinkling mischievously. "What Esteban doesn't know won't hurt him, right?"

You bit your lip, considering his offer. "I suppose one little garage tour wouldn't hurt..."

"Exactly," Lance said, taking a step closer to you. The streetlight cast a warm glow on his face, accentuating his strong jawline. "And maybe we could grab dinner after the race?"

Your heart raced at the suggestion. "Lance Stroll, are you asking me out on a date?"

He grinned, running a hand through his hair. "I guess I am. What do you say?"

Before you could answer, your ride pulled up to the curb. Lance opened the car door for you, ever the gentleman.

"I'll think about it," you said with a coy smile as you slid into the backseat. 

As the car pulled away, you couldn't help but look back at Lance, who was still standing there, watching you go. You felt a mix of excitement and nervousness about what might happen next.

—---------austin gp—--------------------

This was your first time in Austin and you loved the southern culture. You insisted on buying three different pairs of cowboy boots when you came. You knew people didn’t really dress like this all the time here, but it was fun. 

It was warm on race day so you chose a lighter-weight dress paired with the favorite boots you had bought. Flavy matched you in a cream dress and you both fit right in with everyone else in the paddock. Lance was talking to Esteban after the drivers parade and you blushed under his gaze; he clearly was a fan. Esteban was too infatuated with Flavy to notice. 

“Embracing the cowgirl lifestyle,” Lance teased as you reached him. You did a little twirl for him, smiling widely. 

“Yeah, do you like it?” You asked innocently, already knowing the answer. 

“A lot,” he said simply. 

One of the Aston Martin media girls was nearby, holding a cowboy hat that seemed ot be for Lance. You reached out your hand and she gave it to you so that you could place it on his head. 

“There,” you said, breathless from the lack of distance. “Now we match.” 

Lance's eyes darkened as he looked down at you, his hand coming up to adjust the hat. "I like matching with you," he said softly, his voice low enough that only you could hear.

You felt a shiver run down your spine, but Esteban called out to you before you could respond. "Hey sis, come here for a sec!"

Reluctantly, you stepped away from Lance, shooting him an apologetic smile. You could feel Lance's eyes following you as you walked towards your brother.

The race was intense, and neither your brother or Lance put on much of an impressive performance. Lance texted you when he had his phone again, asking to meet up for dinner in a bit, which you agreed to. 

“Are you coming out with us?” Esteban asked, and you faked a yawn, looking at him apologetically. 

“I’m honestly beat; I’ll probably just get room service and call it a night,” you lied. He nodded in understanding before hugging you goodbye and leaving with Flavy. You felt terrible lying to your brother but you wanted to enjoy whatever was going on between you and Lance just the two of you for now. 

You changed into comfier clothes and took off your makeup right as Lance knocked on your door. 

“Still want just to do room service?” He asked. You nodded, waving him in. 

“Yeah, I honestly am tired,” you said. 

“Good, me too,” he agreed. You let your eyes drop to his shirt that was tightly clung to his torso before meeting his smirking gaze. 

You rolled your eyes, moving to look at the menu. He leaned back on your bed, resting his head on the headboard while watching you with amusement. 

“There’s too many choices,” you muttered, unable to decide between chicken tenders and a burger. 

“What are you between?” He asked. 

“Chicken or a burger.”

“Just get both and we’ll split it,” he said and you nodded, calling in the order. Once you had the food, you sat a respectable distance away from him on the bed, letting him talk you through what the race was like for him. 

“Sorry for boring you,” he said sheepishly and you smiled. 

“I’m not bored, I like seeing you get lost like that,” you said. “If only those gossip accounts knew that you actually liked racing.” 

He rolled his eyes, “I don’t know where they come up with that stuff. Didn’t peg you as a gossip follower.” 

“It’s amusing,” you said, shrugging. 

As the night wore on, you found yourself inching closer to Lance on the bed. The conversation flowed easily between you, covering everything from childhood memories to your current aspirations. You were surprised at how comfortable you felt with him.

"You know," Lance said, his voice soft, "I've really enjoyed getting to know you these past few weeks."

Your heart skipped a beat. "Me too," you admitted, meeting his gaze. 

“I should probably get going,” he said, and you felt a wave of disappointment wash over you. 

“Yeah, it’s late,” you said, sliding off the bed to walk him to the door. 

“Esteban said you were remote now, does that mean I’ll see you next week?” He asked, one hand on the handle.

“If you’re lucky,” you teased and he smiled before pressing his lips against your forehead. 

“I’ll see ya,” he said and you were glad he had already turned so that he couldn’t see the red on your face. 

—----------Mexico GP—------------------

Lance was having a good race, slated to get some much-needed points but a last-minute push by Pierre crushed his hopes. He was frustrated coming out of the car, snapping at his engineer before retreating to his driver's room. He rarely lost his cool, but something about today had him trying to simmer down his frustration. Being so close to finishing in points and then having it ripped away was not a good feeling. 

Your brother was pulled away for debriefs so you wandered around the paddock for a bit before running into Fernando. You had gotten to know him a bit when him and Esteban drove together for Alpine. 

“Hey y/n,” the older man greeted you, pulling you into a quick hug. “Your boyfriend is scaring everyone away.” 

“Boyfriend?” You asked confused and Fernando smirked. 

“Yeah your lover boy teammate of mine,” he said. “Since he can’t talk to Esteban about you, I have unfortunately become the sounding board.”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” you said, mumbling, a slight flush on your cheeks. “Is he okay?” 

“Just pissed, snapping at people, try to calm him down will ya?” He asked, not giving you a chance to answer before walking away. 

Sighing, you made your way to the Aston garage, heading towards the room that everyone seemed to be avoiding. You knocked once before pushing open the door to see Lance, shirtless with a scowl on his face. 

Your breath caught in your throat at the sight of Lance's toned chest. Despite his frustrated expression, you couldn't help but admire his physique. Shaking yourself out of your daze, you stepped into the room and closed the door behind you.

"Hey," you said softly, approaching him cautiously. "Tough race, huh?"

Lance looked up, his scowl softening slightly when he saw you. "Yeah, you could say that," he muttered, running a hand through his hair.

You sat down next to him on the small couch, close enough that your thighs were touching. "Want to talk about it?"

He sighed heavily. "It's just... I was so close. Those points would have meant a lot, you know?"

You nodded sympathetically, placing a gentle hand on his arm. "I know. But you drove well out there. Sometimes things just don’t work out.” 

You could feel the anger radiating off of him and could tell he was trying to stop himself from snapping at you. 

“Can I help you relax?” You asked and he scoffed. 

“I don’t think anything can help me,” he said. 

“I can think of a few ideas,” you said, moving off the couch onto your knees in front of him. His eyes widened at what you were suggesting, but the way you were staring up at him had him instantly hard. 

“Y/n…,” he trailed as you started to pull his suit, further down, leaving him just in his briefs. 

“Let me take care of you, baby,” you whispered. 

Lance's breath hitched as your fingers trailed along the waistband of his briefs. His eyes were dark with desire as he gazed down at you.

"Are you sure?" he asked, his voice husky.

You nodded, maintaining eye contact as you slowly pulled down his underwear. His erection sprang free, and you couldn't help but lick your lips at the sight.

Without hesitation, you wrapped your hand around his length, stroking him slowly. Lance's head fell back against the couch, a low groan escaping his lips. Encouraged by his reaction, you leaned forward and took him into your mouth.

"Fuck," Lance hissed, his hand coming to rest on the back of your head.

You worked him with your mouth and hand, alternating between long, slow licks and quick, shallow bobs. Lance's fingers tangled in your hair, pushing your head deeper, causing you to gag. 

You pulled back slightly, adjusting to his size before taking him deeper again. Lance's hips began to thrust gently, matching your rhythm. The room filled with the sounds of his low moans and your muffled whimpers.

"Y/n, I'm close," Lance warned, his grip on your hair tightening.

You doubled your efforts, hollowing your cheeks and swirling your tongue around his tip. With a final groan, Lance came undone, spilling into your mouth. You swallowed everything he gave you, continuing to suck gently until he was completely spent.

Pulling away, you wiped your mouth and looked up at Lance. His chest was heaving, a thin sheen of sweat glistening on his skin. He gazed down at you with a mix of awe and affection.

"Come here," he said softly, helping you up onto his lap. 

“Better?” You asked, and he pressed his lips gently against yours. 

“Much,” he said. 

You played nervously with his hair, his arms wrapped snugly around you as you both sat silently. 

“What’s on your mind, pretty girl?” He asked. 

“I really like you,” you admitted boldly, looking down to see him grinning widely. 

“I really like you too,” he said. 

“I’m not sure if I’m ready to be dragged through the media thought yet,” you said softly. “Or have my family harass me.” 

“We can take things slowly and quietly,” Lance assured you, returning his lips to yours. The kiss was soft and you melted into him. 

—--------------------------------------------------

The next month went by quickly and you didn’t go a day without talking to Lance. You hadn’t seen him much, not being able to go the Brazil GP, which was sad considering how well your brother did. But you facetimed him constantly and he had flown out to London everytime he had a break. 

He was such a sweetheart and made you feel so special, always showering you with compliments and affection. You knew your brother was starting to get suspicious, especially since Lance had bailed on hanging with him multiple times. With that in mind, you decided that maybe it was time to go public, at least with him. 

Flavy had called and said that she and Esteban were renting a cabin in the Alps and wanted to know if you wanted to join. 

“Yeah, I’m free. Can I bring someone?” You asked. 

“Oooo who??,” she questioned over the phone. 

“My boyfriend,” you said quickly, and you heard her scream. 

“Are you joking me?” She complained. “Why didn’t you tell me? Is it who I think it is?” 

“Yes,” you admitted. “Just make sure Esteban is in a good mood.” 

Your flight landed at the same time as Lance’s, and Lance greeted you with a kiss once he saw you come down to baggage claim. 

“Hi, angel, I missed you,” he sai,d and you beamed up at him. 

“I missed you too,” you replied. He took your luggage from you, carrying it to the waiting car as you drove up to the cabin. 

“Nervous?” You asked, noting how Lance bobbed his knee up and down. 

“I can take him, so no,” he said and you playfully hit his shoulder. 

“It’ll be fine,” you reassured him. 

You had thought Flavy would let it slip to Esteban that Lance was coming but based on his shocked face, that was clearly not the case.

As you and Lance stepped out of the car, Esteban's jaw dropped. He looked between the two of you, his eyes narrowing as he noticed your intertwined hands.

"What's going on here?" Esteban demanded, his voice a mix of confusion and anger.

You took a deep breath, squeezing Lance's hand for support. "Estie, Lance and I are together. We've been dating for a little while now."

Esteban's face turned red, and for a moment, you thought he might explode. But then Flavy appeared behind him, placing a calming hand on his shoulder.

"Babe, remember what we talked about," she said softly. "Be happy for your sister."

Esteban took a deep breath, visibly trying to compose himself. "How long has this been going on?"

"Since Austin," Lance answered, his voice not wavering. You both waited in silence for Esteban to respond but he just kept looking from you to Lance, not saying anything.

“Fine.”

That was all he said before he spun on his heel and stormed into the house. 

“That went well,” you muttered. Flavy shot you an apologetic look before following him inside and Lance pulled you into his body. His hands found your jaw as he cradled your face. 

“He’ll come around,” he promised and you couldn’t help but smile. Leaning up, you pressed a soft kiss against his lips before heading inside. 

Inside the cozy cabin, the tension was palpable. Flavy had ushered Esteban into the kitchen, leaving you and Lance in the living room to settle in. You could hear low murmurs from behind the closed door as they spoke, but you couldn’t make out what they were saying. Lance gave your hand a reassuring squeeze as he helped you unpack your coat.

After what felt like an eternity, the kitchen door swung open, and Esteban stepped out, his expression unreadable. Flavy trailed behind him, giving you an encouraging nod.

“Lance,” Esteban said, his tone firm but calmer than before. “Can we talk outside? Just us.”

Lance glanced at you, and you gave him a small nod. “Sure,” he replied, following Esteban onto the snowy porch.

You watched through the window as the two of them stood facing each other. Their conversation was animated at first, with Esteban gesturing wildly while Lance remained composed, his hands tucked into his pockets. But slowly, the tension seemed to melt away. Esteban’s shoulders relaxed, and Lance let out a small laugh, clapping him on the shoulder.

When they finally came back inside, both of them seemed lighter. Esteban walked straight up to you, his expression softening as he looked at you.

“Alright,” he said with a sigh. “If you’re happy, that’s all that matters. But,” he added, pointing at Lance, “if you hurt her, I’ll make sure you regret it.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Lance said earnestly.

Esteban nodded and pulled you into a quick hug. “Just… don’t make me regret this,” he murmured, ruffling your hair like he used to when you were kids.

Lance gave you a knowing smile as Esteban turned to Flavy, muttering something about needing a drink.

“See?” Lance whispered, leaning close to your ear. “Told you he’d come around.”

You laughed, feeling a weight lift off your chest. Maybe this holiday wouldn’t be so bad after all.

Flavy came near you, holding out a glass of wine, “you’re going to need this.”

“Why?” You said, accepting it curiously. She pulled out her phone to show you F1gossip’s latest post: you and Lance kissing at the airport. 

“Let’s get the bottle,” you said. 

[kingmakerpod]

Might be an uncouth subject, but I was wondering if you'd be willing to share some insight on what kind of money goes into producing audio dramas (specifically when it comes to reaching out to/compensating vocal talent.) I know a lot depends on what tools and connections you already have; I'm just looking for a flexible baseline to start from and make sure I'm not cheating or insulting folks by asking them to work for peanuts. Having a target to save up for would be a huge help. Thanks so much!

(And yeah, I'll totally admit this is partly just me wondering how you fine WANA folks managed to nab Jonny Sims and Tiana Camacho for Killjam XXX; let me know if this is a question better posed via email and I'll get out of your hair, sorry for bothering!)

This isn't an uncouth question at all. It's actually a great question and we'll be happy to answer it!

It's hard to give a definitive baseline for budget beyond the cost of web hosting and audio equipment, which in itself can vary quite a bit. The yeti mic and arm set we (Meg and Henry) bought for Less is Morgue (and still record a lot of Killjam and TKH on) cost about 200 dollars. If I remember correctly the hosting costs for Less is Morgue were about 30 a month, and for Kingmaker it's 14 dollars a month. Those are the only two things you absolutely need to spend money on, so it's definitely possible to make a good quality audio drama for under a grand. In fact, we would absolutely not recommend going over a grand at this point. You definitely don't want to shoot too high with the budget for your first project. Spoken from experience, you will end up spending it on things you'll later realise weren't worth it.

The most important thing is just to put something out there first so the actors can tell that the project is real and you're not just stringing them along. The few episodes of Less is Morgue were pretty much all done in-house with a cast that was mostly people we were already friends with, and we didn't do any open auditions until midway through the season. Another way to do it is to start off as a single narrator podcast then gradually introduce a full cast as the show goes on. Other shows have released a pilot episode to the public that then serves as an advertisement for what the rest of the show will sound like. Once you have a sample of your work out there, you can start reaching out to actors.

When it comes to how you compensate your talent- just be upfront about how much money you're working with. The best way to not cheat or insult folks is by giving them realistic expectations. Don't promise money you don't have, and don't ask them to do work for something that you won't be able to finish. If you're honest and easy to work with, a lot of voice actors will be willing to adjust their rates or work for free. Speaking from a voice actor's perspective, Addison said she would be willing to work for free on a first time indie project if it seemed fun and interesting and she could tell that it was something the creator was really passionate about.

As for how we got some of our big names- it really is all about cultivating a reputation for being cool to work with. Maybe not the most useful advice for a first project, but it will be useful later, and it is true. At this point the WANA core four have been involved in The NoSleep Podcast, Congeria, Less is Morgue, The Kingmaker Histories and Mayfair Watcher's Society, and that's only counting the stuff that more than one of us have been involved with. Every project we try to make loads of friends. Eventually you will have enough mutual friends with enough people that you can just hit up Jonny Sims and Tiana Camancho, because someone you know worked with them on some other thing and they're willing to vouch for you.

[yall-batman-fanfic]

The Wrath of Wayne | Bruce Wayne/Batman x OC!Magician [Part 2/3]

Synopsis: Trapped. Both Vivian and Bruce are trapped in the scheme made by Thomas Wayne. This was a threat they have never dealt with before and unlike before this has higher stakes with Valerie’s life in the hands of Thomas Wayne.

Valerie finally stopped crying but she won’t smile. The girl kept pouting even when she was surrounded by her toys, even when Alfred would keep her company with warm milk in her sippy, even when she had Ace and Echo with her… even when her mother was in her line of sight. 

How could she smile? This man, this Batman was keeping her from her mother. This man who calls himself her grandfather would try to feed her with mushed food and try to play with her like everything was okay. 

The first time he tried to play with her, Valerie cried and clung to Alfred, calling him, “Gampa! Gampa!” 

“Ms. Valerie,” Alfred tried to hush her cries, in fear that seeing her cling to him and calling him that would anger Thomas Wayne more. 

“It’s alright, Alfred,” Thomas sighed, giving up for the day and handing him Valerie’s meal. “I’m glad she had you for a grandfather here. She’s in good hands.”

“She misses her mother, Master,” said Alfred.

A pause. Thomas thought for a moment before saying: “I’ll make arrangements for her to see Vivian. But she cannot leave the dome nor can Val be there with her.”

A compromise, this was better than Vivian constantly begging him to let her see her daughter. She might not be his in this world but he still cared. If not as a man who loved her then as an in-law. 

He personally brought Valerie’s crib to the library so she can be with her mother. First the crib, then her toys, mountains of them, some Vivian knew were not even from Valerie’s room but from the store. Thomas Wayne have taken all of those for Valerie. Day and night, Valerie would look at her mother who was trapped in that glass dome, sitting there, trying to talk to her and get her to smile but to no avail. Valerie, as young as she was, knew that something was wrong.

Something bad was happening.

Where was her Dada? Why hasn’t he come to save them? 

Dada would always be there to save them.

When Valerie finally grew tired, Thomas Wayne laid her down on the crib and tucked her in, letting her sleep. But he did not leave. He stayed there, sitting on the chair beside the crib, in front of the dome, and watched as his granddaughter slept. 

“She reminds me of Bruce when he was her age,” said Thomas. “When he was a boy, I made a vow to protect him from anything that would do him harm… and I failed.”

“Where is Bruce?” Vivian asked in a whisper, tired from her many attempts of escape. She can’t get out, she can’t even call for her father, Dream, to save her. “What did you do to him?”

Thomas was silent for a time, contemplating, he tends to do that, then he spoke: “when Bruce was a boy, he would always ask me to read to him a story. It was The Animals and the Pit by Alexander Nikolaevich Afanasyev. Do you know that?” 

His Vivian did.

“Yes, I do,” Vivian answered.

It seems she does too.

Sitting up, Vivian looked at her bloody and bandaged hands and continued: “It’s a Russian Folktale that follows a group of animals traveling together who encounter a large pit. All the animals end up stranded in the pit, and in an attempt to survive longer, they devise trivial competitions in which the loser is eaten by the rest. Eventually, the fox is the last animal alive, tricking the pig into eating itself, and the story ends with an unanswered question: does the fox ever escape the pit?”

“Word for word,” Thomas smiled. “Did Bruce tell you that?”

“He did, but I read it when I was in high school… I found a connection to it right after my mother’s death. If this whole narrative you’re doing is some sort of poetic thing to relate to the story then you’re missing the damn point.”

“And that is?”

“Bruce has gone out of that pit a long time ago. The both of us did. We pulled each other out of that pit. There were those we hurt, who we lost in that pit but we got out.”

“Then why continue being Batman?” Thomas got up and marched up to her, stepping into the circle to tower over her. “Why not stop him?” He hit the glass. “You left me when I won’t stop.”

So, in that universe. In his world, Thomas Wayne had Vivian Pryor. It brought an unsettling chill down her spine to learn that. 

“Maybe because she wanted to get out of that pit, and she can’t if she clings to you,” Vivian answered.

“You died the moment you stepped out of those doors. Car accident.”

She and her mother died in a car accident.

“Your Vivian—the Vivian from your world—were you both…”

“No,” he answered immediately. “I won’t that happen. And it was a mistake. I am glad that in this world you and Bruce found each other. I saw how much my son loves you, Vivian Pryor, if only the Vivian from my world had someone to give her that. Then she wouldn’t have fallen into that tragedy.”

Valerie whimpered in her sleep. Before Alfred could get to her, Thomas Wayne picked up his granddaughter from the crib and lulled her back to sleep. Valerie, still frowning, slept again.

“What’s the goal, Thomas?” Vivian asked. 

“I want Bruce to stop being Batman. I want this to stop, for him to be happy with his family. For us to be a family.”

“You can’t erase whatever happened in that pit,” Vivian argued. “You can’t act as if none of it happened, that none of this happened. Bruce will never submit to you,” Vivian placed her bloody palm on the glass. “He will never let this happen.”

“I know. He is a Wayne. And Waynes rise… if he won’t submit willingly, then I shall break him to submission. Once he comes to, I will take my son and we will go on a journey to bring back the happiness of this home, and by the time we return—the three of us—I hope you, Valerie, Alfred, and your children have come to accept this reality.”

“The three of you?” Vivian asked, but then her gaze went to the family portrait of Thomas, Martha, and young Bruce. “Oh, god… god no! No! What you’re doing is sacrilege! You can’t! She doesn’t deserve this!”

“Martha didn’t deserve to die in that alleyway. Neither did Bruce… and she did not deserve what happened to her in my world… hush now, Vivian, or you’ll wake the baby.”

~ * ~

Bruce woke from the eternal nightmares that his father had placed him in. He was tired but he was pissed. He will get Bane, Falcone, and Thomas Wayne, but for now he needs rest. He needed to recover before going after them, he can’t make a mistake. Not with Vivian and Valerie’s lives on the line. 

He battled his way through Arkham, beating every enemy he faced and leaving them bloody and broken on the floors of Arkham, but for one. Harvey Dent. Two-Face. Two-Face will be his messenger. 

“Tell them,” he said to Dent. “Tell him that I will come for him. But I’m tired, so I’m going home. But once I’ve recovered, I will come, and he will pay for what he did to the mother and daughter he is holding hostage. Do you understand?”

When Dent didn’t answer, Two Face tried to say something but one punch from Batman and the man was dizzy.

“I was talking to Dent. Do you understand?” 

Dent spat out blood and said, “I understand.”

In the Batcave, Bruce slumped in his chair, tired, so tired. All he wanted was to go to Vivian but he couldn't. She’s held captive in a glass dome that was keeping her from using her magic, and his daughter was held hostage by his own father. No, that man wasn’t his father. His father was dead, this Thomas Wayne was from another dimension.

He needed rest to get them out. But to do that, he also needed reinforcements but none of his Robins were responding to his calls. As if they were cut off from him. Maybe they were still busy with handling the chaos that Falcone started in Gotham.

INTRUDER ALERT!

Sighing, Bruce reluctantly wore his cowl and followed the signal to where the alarm was sounded. It brought him to the dining room where Falcone sat at the head of the table, and standing at his side was his father, Thomas Wayne.

“Benvenuti,” Carmine Falcone mocked him. “Who would have thought the Batman was Bruce Wayne… or maybe I should have known too.”

Bruce kept silent and glared at Falcone, and at Thomas Wayne.

“It seems, it’s not just us who find this whole Batman gig a headache too, even the old man-” he laughed “--he crawled out of the grave just to put a stop to this. What do you say, Brucie? Had enough?”

He remains silent.

“Take a seat, son,” Falcone gestured to the many seats at the table. The seats that would always be filled by the members of his family.

“My girls,” Batman demanded. 

Falcone smirked. “Of course. Follow us.”

He did what Falcone said and followed, his father right at his tail as they went to the library. The first he saw was his daughter, sitting on the carpeted floor, playing with her dolls while having a frown on her face, then the person she was playing those dolls with. 

Bane.

The sight of his enemy triggered a fight or flight in Bruce but before he could engage he saw Vivian. Trapped in a glass dome inside a circle that kept her from using magic. When she saw him, Vivian got on her knees and pressed her bloody and bandaged hands on the glass, and she shook her head. 

Don’t attack.

Not when their daughter was at the mercy of a man who can easily crush her with one punch.

So he didn’t.

“Dada!” Valerie called for him, she was about to reach for her as his daughter got on her feet to get to him but Bane took the girl from the ground.

Bruce and Vivian froze at that.

Valerie whimpered in Bane’s arms and she tried her hardest to get to her father and then she started crying.

“Look at that — stop it, you’re scaring the bambina!’ Falcone said. “Come here, sweetheart,” he went to the girl and took her from Bane. “It’s alright, you wanna see Mommy?”

“Dada!” Valerie cried. “Mumma! Dada!”

“Come on, go see Mommy,” Falcone brought her to the glass so she can be close to Vivian. “Daddy can’t play with you right now because he’s in big trouble.”

“Val, it’s okay,” Vivian swallowed her sob. “Please, just give her to Alfred. She’s had enough, hand her to Alfred so she can rest. Please!”

“Look at that. A Wayne begging on her knees to a Falcone. Never thought I’d see that in my lifetime.”

“Carmine,” Thomas spoke with a threatening tone.

“Alright, alright!” Falcone took the girl from the circle and handed her to Thomas, who then called for Alfred so the butler could take her to the nursery. Away from the confrontation. With Valerie gone, they can now move easily. “Kids… I have a couple of my own, they’re my greatest treasure.”

Batman and Vivian disagree. They know the truth about the relationship between Carmine and his children. He was not winning “father of the year”.

Turning to Bane, Batman glared at him and sneered, “I’m going to break your back.”

Bane smirked.

“Did you do that to her?” He questioned Falcone.

“Oh this?” Carmine knocked on the glass. “No, that’s your old man’s doing. And that,” he pointed to Vivian’s bloody hands. “That’s all her.”

“Enjoy this while it lasts,” Batman said. “Because once I’m through with him,” he pointed at Bane. “You’re next.”

“I’d choose your opponents well, son,” Falcone shoved his hands in his pockets.

Before he could register what was happening, Bane ran up to Batman, tackling him to the ground. Bruce, quick on his feet, got up and kneed Bane at the face, giving him time to get out of the hulking man’s grasp. He then punched Bane across the face before he could recover, and again, and again, harder than the last. Then he grabbed Bane by his shirt and headbutted him hard. 

Bane fell to the ground.

He should have known better that Bane wouldn’t stay down, but Bruce’s mind was clouded. He was exhausted after those nightmares and he was furious to see his daughter and wife prisoners in their own home. He went straight to Falcone.

“Hold on!” Falcone backed up at the glass. “I said, hold it!”

“BRUCE!” Vivian hit the glass, trying to warn him. “BEHIND YOU!”

Too late. Bane grabbed Batman by his cape and threw him across the room, smashing him at the family portrait of him and his parents. Bane didn’t give him time to recover and kept thrashing him around like a ragdoll, destroying everything in the room. But Bane was smart enough to not bring the damage to where the circle and the glass were. They knew if she got out, they had hell to pay.

Turning to Thomas Wayne, Vivian hit her fists at the glass to catch his attention. “STOP THIS! HE’S YOUR SON! STOP IT! MAKE THEM STOP! PLEASE!” She begged the man.

Thomas turned to her and said: “I told you. We will break him into submission.”

She watched in horror as Bane lifted Bruce from the ground, holding him up in the air and drove his back down to his knee. The last that Bruce heard was the sound of Vivian crying out to him.

~*~

Helplessness. That was what the Robins felt as they stood atop of Wayne Tower, overlooking Gotham as Falcone’s men led this anarchistic dystopia.  They can’t do anything but stand there. They can’t save Gotham, and they can’t save Vivian and Valerie.

Bane made it clear, if they come close to Wayne Manor, he will crush Valerie with his bare hands, then Vivian.

They can’t take that risk. 

Even Damian knew best to not test Bane. Not when it was his mother and sister, and Alfred in the line. So, what? What can they do?

What they do best, they guess. They try to save Gotham. Right now, all they can do was stop Falcone’s men. To help the GCPD get back control on the city, and to do that they’ll need to get Commissioner Gordon out of the cell he was in at Black Gate and replace the current Commissioner that Falcone put up there. Arnold Wesker. 

Easy.

They already know where Scarface was.

~ * ~

“VIVIAN!” Bruce shot up awake from days of sleep. Knocked out was the right term. But as he opened his eyes, it wasn’t the library that he saw nor one of the rooms in the Manor. It was the vast night sky littered with stars. Sand under him, and the dryness of the desert air. 

“It’s alright,” Thomas Wayne placed a hand on his son’s shoulder. “You’ve been through a lot, just remember what you’ve been taught.”

“You!” Bruce threw his tied up hands at his father to hit him, but Thomasa blocked it with his arm, then punched him back to the ground.

“It’s okay. You can be scared, it just means you have to fight back that fear.”

“You,” Bruce spat out the blood from his mouth. “You did all of this… you took my daughter, your own granddaughter, hostage, and you placed Vivian, my wife, in a cage!”

It would take time for him to get used to the fact that Vivian was Bruce’s in this dimension. He just hopes that by the end of this journey the mention of her name no longer places the image of her lying beside him in his bed. That needed to end if he wanted this plan to be successful. If he wanted them to be this happy family he dreamed of. 

It needs to succeed. He has done all of this – the killing, the betrayal, the hurt he’s placed on Vivian and Valerie. 

So it better succeed.

Facing his son, Thomas said to him: “You have been defeated. Broken, body and soul, that’s behind you. It’s time to rebuild. There’s nothing to worry about, not anymore. Father’s got you.”

Bruce sneered at him and said: “Why?” 

“You will learn soon enough.”

As the sun rose, Bruce was helped by Thomas to get on the horse while his father pulled them along, dragging with them the casket behind them. As they rode down the dunes, Thomas explained to Bruce that he put back his spine so they could go through this journey, the both of them. When asked where they were, Thomas gave the answer, and when asked why, he replied: “You’re the world’s greatest detective, when the drug wears off, you’ll understand.” When asked about the coffin, Thomas said: “You’ll understand soon.”

They rode for days, and on occasion they would be attacked by ninjas in the desert. The closer and closer they are to the destination, Bruce finally recognizes a couple of things in their travels. “Those ninjas are Ras al Ghul’s guards, that means we’re getting closer to the Pit.”

Thomas laughed. “You’re getting it now. I’m still proud of you, my boy.”

Then it hit him. The coffin!

Turning to the sight of the coffin their horse dragged, Bruce exclaimed in horror, “That’s mother’s coffin.”

Thomas halted their horse and turned to him. “We’re almost there. We’ve bled, we’ve burnt,  we’ve earned our rest. And we have earned our right to go home, and once we do we will go back as a family.”

“Where is it?” Bruce asked him.

Thomas pointed to the satchel, and from there Bruce pulled out his cowl and wore it over his head. 

They pushed through.

“I remember the blood, the pearls. Knowing I will never see you again, I forfeited my life and surrendered to a vow, and where did it get me?”

Thomas laughed. “You made your choices, you saved who you could and more, and while doing so you rebuilt. You started your own family. You’re lucky now that it still stands firm even with that cowl as the foundation of your life… I am proud of you, son, but after this it’s time we rebuilt. It’s time we see this through.”

Their journey went on and more ninjas came. In the last wave before the Pit, Thomas killed every one of the ninjas but for one. He’ll be needing that for the Pit. Later that night, they stood before the Pit.

“How did Mother go in your world?” Bruce asked.

“She didn’t die easily. Not important, we’re here, and soon she as well. We will be a family again, Bruce —-”

He shouldn’t ask but he couldn’t help but wonder. “And Vivian? Do you know her there as well?”

Thomas  paused from dismounting his horse then sighed. “I did. Know this son, I am only telling you so we can start anew.  No secrets will be between us…” he was wrong to ask. “In my world, Vivian and I are familiar with each other. She was an important person to me…”

Bruce’s hold on his reigns tightened. But no. Not now, not when they were so close.

“What happened to her there?”

“She left me because I refuse to stop, and as soon as she did, she died in a car accident. Now, understand, I hold no feelings for your wife. I am telling you this now because you asked and because I want a clean slate for us all. Once we return, the three of us, we can be a family. You will have your Vivian, and I shall have Martha again.”

That wasn’t enough. Not for Bruce.

Descending to the pit, Thomas and Bruce carefully brought down the coffin and the ninja. In the Pit, Thomas took the flare from the ground, and turned to his son whose rage he’s been feeling since telling him about the Vivian from his world. 

“I needed you at a low point. To be broken. After Bane, after the nightmare, and after seeing the helplessness to not save her. We have a way out. You can have the love and happiness that you deserve. You can have what we’ve lost. We can be a family, Bruce! We can live happily without the cape!”

Bruce paused and said, “The book I would always ask you to read. The reason why I liked it so much is because I hoped the ending might change. Then, like those animals who fell in, I had no way out. I was in that dark pit with no idea of getting out… then she came, some one as broken as I, and she lit up the way and showed me the way out.. We pulled each other out of that pit. And believe it or not but I am happy. We are happy. You never really understood Vivian. You think the Vivian from your world left you because of the cape? She left you because of what you do with it. But the Vivian here. My Vivian understands, and she has accepted me as both Bruce Wayne and Batman!” 

He threw a punch at his father, and Thomas was quick to return the favor. The father and son battled it out in the Pit, both battling for their beliefs and their hope. Both fighting in hopes of getting out of that Pit and return to their family. As they fought, Batman threw his father against the coffin and from it stones poured out, revealing the last secret that kept them from a fresh start.

“No,” Thomas said. “What have you done? When?”

“While you were sleeping. Mother is buried in the desert where you can never find her.”

“Why?”

“I wasn’t sure if I can best you, but here I knew I could hurt you!”

“We broke you!” Thomas punched him across the face. “I broke you! You can never be Batman! All you can be is my son!” Punch. “To be a father!” Kick “A husband!” Punch “You can never be Batman!”

~ * ~

Wesker came to her cage, opened the panel at the back so he could change the bandages around her hands. Vivian watched as the Ventriloquist did his work. How long has it been since she was placed in this dome? How long since Bruce was taken by his father after Bane broke his back? How long since she last held her daughter.

Thomas Wayne has returned but he said nothing about Bruce.

“Wekser,” she spoke. “Please… let me see my daughter.”

“I-I-It’s n-n-n-not m-m-my d-d-decision t-tt-to m-make,” he replied.

“Please, let me see her. I can’t remember the last time I held her.”

“Ventriloquist,” Thomas Wayne appeared at the door of the library. “Leave us.”

Wesker was quick and clumsy as he left. He didn’t even bother to close the panel of her cage. But it didn’t matter if he didn’t, Thomas Wayne took Wesker’s place at the stood and finished the work in cleaning her wounds. She was in need on stitches which Thomas look into before she left, then he assigned Wesker and Alfred to look after her and make sure to change the bandages everyday.

Fractured knuckles, he  told her when he fixed her hand, but nothing he can’t take care. In a couple of weeks she'll be back to normal. 

As a reply she told him, if she had her magic she’ll be healed now.

“Valerie’s fine. She’s with Alfred. She prefers his company,” said Thomas.

“Alfred is her grandfather,” Vivian told him.

Thomas sighed. “That he is. But she will learn who her grandfather really is. Children are flexible. They’re like clay that we can easily mold to what we want them to be.”

“You’re wrong… children are not some clay or canvas that you can turn to whatever you want them to be. They’re their own persons. Valerie is young, and yes, she learns from us but she will have her own thoughts. Her own dreams. But now, she depends on us. So, please, let me be with her.”

“You know I can’t do that.”

“Please!” Vivian begged. “What do I need to do so I can be with her? I want to hold my daughter! I haven’t seen her since yesterday! I haven’t seen my children for weeks now, and I don’t know where they are or how they are! And my husband! You broke him and you took him from me! At least let me have my daughter before I go into insanity!”

Thomas’ hand shot out quick and grasped Vivian by her face with a grip so tight she knew it would leave a bruise. “Never joke like that. Ever.”

“I wasn’t joking. It’s the truth,” Vivian whispered.

Thomas released Vivian and pushed her back into the glass cell. He left the room only to return moments later with a crying Valerie with Alfred running after him, begging for him to be gentle with the girl. Thomas then opened the panel of the glass cage and handed Valerie to her mother.

“There,” he told Vivian and left.

Vivian brought her daughter to an embrace and hushed her cries.

“It’s okay,” Vivian cooed at Valerie. “Mumma’s here. I’m right here.”

“Ms. Vivian, if there’s anything you need,” Alfred trailed off.

“Her food, Alfred, and her milk, and maybe a glass of water,” Vivian answered.

“Right away, Ma’am.”

“And a piece of paper.”

Alfred paused before he could leave.

“Shall I also bring a pen, Ma’am.”

“No,” Vivian said, her eyes fixed on the stitch that popped. “I won’t be needing it. Not for this.”

[jjkarmy091]

Crush- Jungkook

Summary: You never thought being friends with BTS was gonna be this hard, especially when you ended up falling hard for one of them. Everything goes well until there's a third person involved. You can only wait to see what's happening after. Genre: romance; angst

Pairing: Jungkook x female!reader

Wordcount: 8.222

Warning: curse words; smut

Author's note: Hey guys. I started writting this idea very randomly and this is the result. Also this is my first time writting smutt so please be understanding. Hope you guys like it <3

P.S- I'm sorry for any mistakes!

You’ve been friends with the BTS members for a while, but you met them way before they were this famous, as cliché as it sounded. You started taking dance classes about 8 years ago. That’s a fun fact about you, you always loved dancing and everything related to it. On your worst days that was your escape, the only way you could heal somehow. When your grandmother passed away, dancing was the only way you found to suppress the pain and guilt of not having been there. Interestingly, it was also at that time you met Jhope, Tae and Jimin.  

You guys met in 2018 on those dance lessons you were taking and you felt grateful for it. In so much competitiveness, they were always so kind to you that you ended up being fond on them. Hours became days and days became weeks and when you realised you were like flesh. 

A year and a half later the trio auditioned for Hybe and got selected. Being trainees, all the free time they had was for rehearsals and recording sessions. You continued to take dance classes, at the same time as you were busy at school, so visiting your friends wasn't as easy as you thought it’d be. 

That was the reason you loved summer. Being free from school, you had all time in the world to enjoy life and do whatever you pleased, which was practically going out with your best friend Tate. Every time you could you'd meet up with the boys too, which lead us to July 14th 2019, you were waiting for your friends at a deserted ice cream parlor. You would regularly go there because you’re close to the owner and the guys would go there to have their private time alone, free from the drama and pressure from the company.   

You were about to text Tae when you saw three silhouettes that you recognized plus one you couldn't identify. As they approached, the trio greeted you, apologizing for the delay as they had problems with the bands manager. That was when you met Jungkook for the first time. A tall, sun kissed skinned boy with big brown eyes with some earrings dandling around. Your eyes focused on him all the way until they reached where you were. He was absolutely gorgeous but didn’t talk much, you could see he was shy. You did try your best to make him feel more comfortable by talking to him or asking him stuff but his answers were very short and dry. You thought maybe he didn't like you that much to keep a conversation. Tae and Jimin held the whole conversation that day while you kept looking briefly towards Jungkook. You noticed he’d glance up to you sometimes but he remained in silence looking at his phone for most of the time. You concluded that maybe he had a girlfriend hence why he probably was so quiet around you, not sparing you glance that took more than 5 seconds. 

 The times they couldn’t meet you, you’d be the one waiting for them outside Hybe. You usually didn't come in. You knew the atmosphere there was very toxic and what the guys were going through and all that pressure was slowly tearing them apart and if you went there you knew there’d be chaos, something about them not being seen with girls to avoid difamation, dating rumours and scandals that could harm their image, as if they didn’t date or hang with girls anyway. Nevertheless the guys made sure to keep you a part of their life throughout their growing career, encouraging you to go there whenever you wanted.

Eventually you ended up meeting the rest of the members. The ony person who knew about this connection was Tate, who knew about your obssession with BTS but never understood why until one day you told her you had two tickets to their concert in Seoul. The only thing she wasn’t expecting was you being backstage introducing them to her. She was shock for the rest of the night and as soon as you got home she gave you the biggest tantrum about it, asking you why you dind’t give her a heads up, but got over it the next day. 

You ended up creating a very beautiful friendship with everyone, getting along with them pretty well, even tho Jungkook was the furthest from you still, much to your sadness. As you hung out with the boys, you developed a huge crush on him and not just because he’s attractive, he was so much more than that. After so many years, you know that he is one of the most humble people you have ever met. Not that the others aren't, but he has something different. The way he looks at people sweetly, the way he wrinkles his nose when he laughs, the way he bites the inside of his mouth when he's nervous and the way he’s not afraid to cry and show his emotions.

After summer break you went back to school, having the same dynamic as always, classes, studies and dance lessons. You’d also go out with Tate everyday, especially when the boys were away indefinitely. The more the guys got known, the more time they spent away and the harder it was to see them. You knew it was part of the process and you were very proud of them but sometimes you caught yourself wishing they were still the little boys from the beggining, meaning you’d have more time with them like before. Despite it all, you always followed their journey, whether it was good or bad. You always saw what came out on social media, especially about Jungkook. Being the maknae and quite talented and flashy, he was often involved in rumors with singers and actresses. Often denied, other times ignored.  

The only vacation the boys had after this career development was Christmas 2021 when they had the opportunity to come home after almost two years touring. You were ecstatic. Even though you heard from them every now and then and talked to Tae every day, having them near was completely different, so when you heard they were back you and Tate decided to organize a small welcome party. You were also on school break so you two had tim to organize everything. 

With a lot of effort and courage you spoke to their manager about using a small space at Hybe for the party, which miraculously was accepted. When the boys arrived and saw everything prepared, they felt so happy and at home. You hugged them all and were surprised to actually see Jungkook reciprocate. Your heart felt super warm, you had to confess. Everyone had fun, drank and danced. As it was hot with all that crowd, you escaped outsidee to get some air. A few minutes passed when you heard footsteps behind you. 

“I’ll be right there Tae. Just needed some air, you know how I feel with a lot of crowds around"  

“Unlucky for you it’s not Tae and I don’t know how you feel but feel free to tell me all about that” you turned around suddenly, surprised to hear Jungkook's voice. God, he looked perfect in that light blue shirt and tight, ripped black jeans. You did everything you could to concentrate and looked straight ahead again, adjusting your coat. 

“What are you doing outside Jk? It’s cold. You shoudn’t be here, it’s not good for your voice, remember?” 

“I'm probably doing the same thing as you, running away from the crowd. When in your daily life you are surrounded by people there's a time you just want to enjoy your own company. Also, don’t worry about my voice, I’m used to this at this point” you smiled while turning to him  

“Let me say I’m impressed. After so many years this is the biggest conversation we had. Made me wonder if I was the one at fault since you talked to everyone but me.” 

Jungkook frowned “ Sorry about that. You know I've always been very shy and I'm not good at opening up to people. But it has nothing to do with you I promise. The good thing about being an idol is that you get used to dealing with a lot of people, that helped me a lot too.” 

“That or the fact that you're surrounded by girls trying to make out with you?” you said jokingly, but at the same time you felt a touch of jealousy just thinking about that option. Even though you didn't you ended up thinking about all the people who could have throw themselves at him and you got a serious face. “Just kidding, you don’t have to answer. It’s not my business anyway” your throat was so dry you had to take a sip of your drink.

“If I didn't know any better I’d say you're jealous” It was one of the things you disliked about Jungkook the most, the fact that he could read people as if he was inside them, like he was the one feeling things. You knew he was messing with you but he didn’t know you were crushing on him and you were in fact jealous as fuck. 

“jealous of who? Of those delusional girls who think you’ll chose them over anything else?” Damn why did she sound so defensive right now? Get your shit together Y/N 

“Hey! Calm down, I was just messing with you. I don’t have time and space for relationships of any kind. Right now we have so much on our plate that relationships are far from our goals. Doesn’t mean we can’t have fun once in a while though” you knew he was mocking you however you ended up punching him in the arm. Since when had he gotten so muscular?  

Ever since that day you have gotten closer. Now he no longer ignored you. If necessary he would be the first to bother you to the point where you wondered why the hell were you crushing on him all this time, but then he’d give you that bunny smile and everything would go down the drain. Even busy, outside the country and having concerts everyday you were always talking to each other.

You had finished your studies and were auditioning to become an official dancer. You dreamt of working with big groups but you knew it’d take a lot first. You got a lot of no’s before the big yes. When you received the news you were the new dancer for Stray Kidz you cried and called Jungkook immediately. The next day he was on your door with a bouquet of flowers and a cake. Everything you ever dreamed of was finally happening and you could only feel grateful and knowing Jungkook was there every step of the way madde you have the impression that maybe he could feel something for you too. The more he was present in you life, the more your feelings were prevailing, there was no way to ignore it and you were sure those who knew you well also noticed. Tate had questioned you once about being in love with Jk and denied it but with no success. Her words still echo in your mind ‘till this day 

"You know that despite everything he's famous Y/n and above all he's young. He has everything right now and he's not going to stop taking advantage of it and you're the one getting hurt in the end. It's just a crush, it’ll  pass if you give yourself the opportunity to meet other people" Was she right? maybe. Did you listen to her? Definitely not. Hence why you are heartbroken at this moment.  

April 2023 and Harry Styles was having a concert here in Seoul and you were looking forward to go. Jungkook knew you loved Harry and as soon as the tickets came out he surprised you with VIP tickets with the opportunity to meet him backstage. You were so thrilled you jumped on him hugging him so tight he almost suffocated., but of course there had to be something. Due to changes in Stray Kidz shedule, a last minute rehearsal was booked and guess what, on the same day and same hour as the concert was supposed to be. You were devastated, yet there was nothing you could do about it. It was work and right now you had no right to miss it on a whim.

When you told Jungkook, he got so sad for you. You told him to go so the tickets wouldn’t go to waste and you’d meet up after the concert so he could tell you all about it, and that’s exactly how it happened. He went to the concert with friends and you went to more than two and a half hours of rehearsal for a surprise concert that was going to take place in three days. You and Jungkook had agreed to meet next to the ice cream parlor as it was the least frequented place and most secure to meet up. The fact that it was the place you met also had given it a different touch, that’s why you considerated it your favorite place. 

You got there before him so you waited for a while however there were no signs of him. Half an hour passed and still nothing. At this point you had already sent him a few texts but still no answer. It struck one hour of waiting and now you were thinking something bad had happened to him because this wasn't Jungkook’s usual behaviour. You called him and he didn't answer, so you decided to call Tae. 

If you knew then what you know now you would’ve left without thinking twice. When you called Tae you asked him when was the last time he had seen Jk, to which he replied that they and a few other friends were at the concert and then he left with a girl named Winter. As you couldn't go with him he didn't take long to find a replacement and that was already a punch in your heart, but knowing that he forgot the plans he had with you for a girl broke you completely. 

He didn't know about your feelings for him so you didn't have to be upset or jealous because he found someone else to go with him, but forgetting about you later? it was too much. The least he could have done was warn you there was a change of plans. You waited for him for an hour with a snack you prepared especially for him because you know he loves food, what for? Maybe Tate was right, it was time to forget about this stupid crush. After all nothing would come out of it. He was a famous idol with everyone at his feet (including yourself) and you? You were just a girl who took her first steps in the industry and that was what you should focus on, your goals!

When you got home, you took off your makeup and did your skin care and then threw yourself on your bed and screamed into your pillow. When you calmed down, you looked at your phone at 1:05 a.m. and there was still no sign of Jungkook. Without thinking much, you wrote him one last text, turned off your phone and tried to sleep. 

------------------ 

The next morning you woke up full of pain in your body, of course you weren't surprised, after almost three hours of intensive training, apart from the previous exercises you did, it was a huge burden. Even though you were used to dancing for hours on end, the pain was a sign that you did a good job. You had reherseal before dinner so you still had time to rest a bit and to tidy up your room. You turned your phone back on only to be faced with dozens of calls and texts from Jungkook, which you ignored. By the time you finished it was lunch time but you weren’t in the mood to cook so you enjoyed the good weather outside to go and grab a meal. When you were about to leave the house you hit what looked like a wall, but it was neither more nor less than Jungkook's chest. At first you didn't understand anything, but then you looked up and saw the figure of the person you were ignoring, you snorted and tried to turn away and go your way when you felt a hand grab your arm. 

“Before you kick me in the balls PLEASE hear me out. I know you think I ditched you last night but it’s not what like that at all. It’s NOT what you’re thinking”  

“Dude please. First of all I’m not thinking about anything and second yes you did Jungkook how the hell did it even occur you to leave me alone late at night? I spent one hour waiting for you man, ONE HOUR- waiting for you like the fool I am, only to find out later that you went to enjoy the night with some Winter girl. What kind of consideration do you have for me? It wouldn't hurt much to send me a text saying the plans would change, it would be okay, I would understand! what the fuck Jung---” you stopped talking after realising how close you both were. He was so close that you could feel his breath on your nose.  

"I'm so sorry. It wasn't my intention at all. Since you couldn't come I invited Winter, a friend of mine from the industry. She had no one to go with so I asked her to come along. When it was over, I took her home so she wouldn't go alone, but halfway there I ended up getting a flat tire and when I went for my phone it had run out of battery. Winter asked for help from hr phon to the tow truck. At the end of it I went to ice cream parlow we use to meet but you weren't there anymore. When I got home and plugged in my phone your texts and calls started showing up, I called you back but it was disconnected. I knew you were home today so I decided to take a chance and come here to apologize to you. I’m sorry bug” 

Now that you knew the situation, you felt a little embarrassed by your reaction. Maybe you overreacted a bit. You looked at him and saw him with bags of food on his hand so you opened the door and let yourself in. Jungkook was still outside, unsure if you wanted him in or gone until he saw you open the door wider and got himself in aswell dropping the bags on the nearest table.  

“I'm more relieved to know that you didn't ignore me in vain then. Lucky you showed up today and not yesterday. I would’ve committed a crime if you showed up here yesterday” To be honest you were much more relaxed knowing that despite the misfortune he hadn't left you to be with someone else. For no reason at all, this information glued some pieces of your heart together, however, you still felt a little sad that he had taken a female friend to the concert right after you told him you couldn’t. Stupid you know 

“You know I wouldn't do that silly. You’re my number one girl, you know that” At that moment you just wanted to punch him. Him saying those things had made a turmoil in your heart. 

“Ohhh you stop it. As if Jk, as if. Is this the conversation you use when you want to hook up with someone or make them forgive you?”  

“Not at all. You wanna know what I do? I go to their house with their favourite food and tell them how they bright my day and I can’t stand them being mad at me” you throw him a pillow, hitting him on his arm while he sits on your couch laughing and clapping about your reaction. “But now seriously. You know I’d never leave you hanging like that and I came to redeem myself. So here it is, let's eat, I’m starving.” You sat next to him accepting what he gave you. With that mix of emotions from yesterday you ended up not eating anything.  

“What are you gonna do later?”  

“I have a rehearsal before dinner, finishing some details on the choreographies to make everything perfect. Why?” 

“Just wondering. I will probably get to the studio and record some stuff I’ve been making. Do you want me to pick you up after?” 

“Make sure to not delete your creations. I still can't forgive you for what you did with decalcomania.” Jungkook laughs and you both get to finish your meal. After minutes of silence he spoke again 

“Y/n?”  

“Hm?” 

“If Hybe made you an offer to dance for BTS would you accept it?” You weren't expecting that, so your only reaction was to start coughing as if you had choked on something. You brushed it off, replying in a funny tone 

“Why? Are you thinking about having me there?” You were expecting him to laugh as well but all he did was look at you.  

“I don’t know Kookie. Right now I couldn’t exchange, I signed a six months contract with Stray Kidz and I actually enjoy working with them, besides if anyone found out I knew you all before fame they would use that against me. I don't want to live in anyone's shadow. I want to acquire things on my own merit, not because I know person A or B.” 

Before he could answer his phone started ringing and he answered it. While he was talking to the person on the other line, you were tidying up the dishes and throwing away the waste. When he finished he said he had to leave to the studio but that you’d see each other later. He gave you a tight hug and left.  

You didn't know why but there was a change between you two after that question. Of course you’d love to make part of their dance team, be close to your best friends, be close to Jungkook, that's all you ever wanted, but it would complicate things, even more so if it came out in public, and damaging their image was the last thing you wanted to do. You looked at the clock and as it was still early you decided to watch Step up to ease your mind. You left around 6 p.m and started another round of practice. You loved the feeling of being free on stage, you didn’t have to pretend or fake anything, it would come out so spontaneously. When it ended you saw a text from Jungkook asking if you could meet him at their studio. It was now 8 p.m, so you went. As you get there, your name was already on the list of people allowed in the company so it wasn't difficult to get in and find the way to the studio. When you arrived you immediately start to hear the noise of Tae's screams and Jin's laugh. When you got a better visibility you noticed Jk lying on the ground, which was unusual for him. Jimin is the first to speak  

““Y/n, please come inside! Can you help JK get to his apartment?He’s quite sick.” You sighed as you started approaching Jungkook. He looked so pale. 

" Hey bunny, you feeling okay?” You asked softly.  

Jungkook looked over, you shouldn’t be so close to me. You'll end up getting sick aswell. I'm sorry I couldn't meet you bug” He said. He was about to stand up when you walked over and put your hands upon his shoulder supporting him still. 

“Of course I should be here, you idiot, right next to you.” You told him leading him to a couch, pushing him down gently.

“Did you take some meds already?” You asked looking at him. He nodded. “Have you eaten anything?” You asked raising your eyebrows. He nodded. You plopped down beside him and he was scooting away.  

“Jungkook please it’ll be fine. I’ll be fine. My immune system is not as weak as yours.” You joked, referring to the moment when you fell sick and he took care of you. It was sweet and thoughtful. Although the next day he suffered and you were well and happy. He squinted his eyes and laughed. 

“Hey! Don’t mock my immune system!” He shouted jokingly. He scooted over and wrapped his arms around you. 

“Smooth Jk. Smooth.” You said teasingly. Jungkook turned red and glared at you, not later he smirked and said, “You insisted first.”  

You looked right and you saw his face. You laughed so hard. He was puckering his lips and raising his perfectly arched eyebrows. He was doing his ‘trying so hard to be flirty’ face. The other boys were watching the whole scene and laughed. Everyone left the studio in the meantime and you helped Jungkook out too, taking the bag he had with him and went to your car until you reached his apartment, where you helped him out of the car. Getting in, he sat down on his couch while you grabbed him a glass of water and handed it to him, sitting down next to him. Suddenly, you felt a heavy weight upon your lap. You looked down and you saw Jungkook wrapping his strong arms around your waist and snuggled closer to you. 

“Anyway, you’re here. Might be the best to take full advantage.” He mumbled softly. He looked so cute and your heart fluttered at the sight. For others it might look weird but you knew he was always an affectionate guy. You were comfortable with him anyways. You massaged his scalp, played with his hair and gently traced his cheekbones. You wondered to yourself, how does he look so good while being sick? At this moment you imagined yourself being together with him. How perfect it would be.  

Time passed by and he did was still asleep. You could feel his warm breath and gently squeezes. You felt your phone vibrate so you picked it up. It was Tae   

“How’s he feeling?” He asked 

“I don’t know. Better? Hopefully.” You answered softly. He laughed. “You should tell him how you feel about him. I support this, we all do.” Your silence was enough of an answer because Tae replied right away “Don’t worry Y/n, I won’t tell him. You should though.” You shook your head and shifted a bit feeling your face warming up. Jungkook tightened his grip and snuggled closer to you. 

“He likes you back Y/n.” 

“No, Tae. He deserves someone better than me. I won’t confess my feelings just so that I would feel relieved and burden him with that info. I won’t lose him as a friend just because I can’t control my feelings for him.” Jungkook did deserve someone better, someone who could give him what he deserves and you knew you weren’t that person, at least not right now 

“Jk would be lucky to have you, y/n.” Tae answered with such certainty in his voice.  

“I would prefer being together with him as his friend, rather than losing him because of this stupid feelings.” You answered quietly. 

“If it’s meant to be, it will be, remember that. If you guys need anything give me a call” and he hung up. You were playing with his hair when you felt Jungkook’s long finger plunged beside of your stomach. You were squirming and he was holding you down. For a sick person, his strength is admirable. “Jungkook, stop!” He looked down at you and smiled teasingly.  

Suddenly, it struck you. What if he overheard the conversation with Tae? You froze at the thought. “Do you want something to drink?” You stood up walking over the sink to grab him some more water. As you were filling his cup you felt his arms engulfed you from the back. His head resting over your shoulder. 

“Bug I don’t want to drink it.” He whispered softly against your ear. His hand turned you around and now you were facing him. He caressed your cheeks and his hands snaked around your hip and put you on top of the kitchen sink. 

“I heard your conversation with Tae” He chuckled. Your heart dropped and you looked away. “Don’t look way,” he put his finger under your chin. 

“Oh god, how embarassing. You don’t have to do this. I get it. Let’s just not” Jungkook looked at you straight in the eyes. You looked away, you could not do this. you felt tears pooling around. He grabbed your face and forced you to look at him. 

“You are the best thing that could have ever happened in my life. It’s you that I don’t deserve. I’ve always liked you I just couldn’t find the courage to tell you this. Since the first time we met. You looked absolutely stunning I couldn't even look at you. Then you tried to make small talk with me and all of a sudden I forgot how to speak. I felt so bad because you looked so sad after” 

“Oh!” You looked at him and couldn’t help but grin.  

“Yeah, oh.” He answered playfully.  “Let’s take things slow if you want or still have any doubts of my feelings fo--" You didn’t let him finish because you kissed him. You were waiting for this moment for so long and now that you knew the feelings were mutual you wouldn't let the opportunity pass. He grabs you by the ass and takes you to his couch. You grabbed his hair to deepen the kiss. As he reached the couch, Jungkook sat down with you on top of him and you two stayed like that for a minute. You could feel his boner peek through his jeans against yours. You haven’t done anything besides kissing and you were already soaking wet, the effect he has on you is tremendous. But instead of continuing fooling around he sits you down and stands up. 

“I want you so badly Y/n but not like this. Two minutes ago I said we’d take things slow and now I need to get away from you, otherwise I’m not gonna let you leave tonight. I want to take you out first and then see what happens” Y/n bit her lips while she adjusted her clothes “and here I was thinking you’d be doing me just right on our first kiss”  

“I rather be doing you bad every day and every night after this, so I can wait a little longer” He teased. The thing is, could you?  

The days after this moment remained normal. You at your rehearsals and accompanying SKZ and Jungkook focused on recording the new album that BTS were preparing, not to mention other activities he had that took him to travel for three or four days to America every now and then. When you two were alone, it felt like hell was on earth. The environment would get so hot and you couldn’t resist each other. Even if you haven't had sex yet, there would be silly hands here and there, not to mention Jungkook’s mouth on you. No one has ever eaten you out as good as he does. If he can get three orgasms, sometimes more just with his mouth and fingers you can only imagine what he can do with the rest. It’s like your body molds itself just for him. 

Today was just another day. You were off work and had planned to have lunch with Tate. You were wearing a long black dress, curly hair and some makeup. It was rare but sometimes you liked to get it done. After lunch you decided to go on a shopping spree. As you were waiting for Tate to get out of Zara you saw someone who looked like Jungkook with some blond, slim girl but you doubted it, you knew he was busy with work, it couldn't be him, so you tried to let it go. An hour and a half later you got home and as you didn't feel like cooking you ordered two portions of fried chicken in case Jungookk was having dinner with you. You called him twice and had already sent him a few messages, all of them unread.   

You decided to wait for him to reach out to you. You turned on your tv and started scrolling through your phone. Right now, you were on Instagram when you received a text from Tate “isn’t this your Jungkook?” Attached to this were a few pictures where it could be seen Jungkook and a girl you’ve never seen before. In the caption it said “BTS Jungkook and Winter Aespa seen out and about on a cute date. The dating rumors between these two have always been huge, although neither party has spoken about it, will they confirm it now?”  

Your heart shattered. So it was Jungkook you saw before. Once again with the same girl he stood you up for the last time. You were like a statue, you didn't know what to do or how to react. Without realizing it, tears began to flow down your face. Meanwhile your phone vibrated with notifications from Tate about Jungkook. You got up and went to the bathroom to see how you looked. You felt so stupid but this wasn’t ending this way. You may have feelings for him but he’s not allowed to play with you like that. You were boiling at this point.  

Grabbing your car keys you went straight to Jungkook’s house, hoping he’d be there so you could slap the hell out of him. Getting there you rang the bell. To your surprise, the door soon opened and you let yourself in. You called the elevator and took advantage of the waiting time to rehearse your speech hoping not to give in to his soft words. By the time you got to his door, he was already waiting for you with a smile on his face and you swear it made you so angry that as soon as you reached him, you punched him in the stomach. 

He was not expecting this at all. All contorted, he looked at you with a what the fuck face.  

“What is wrong with you Y/n?” 

“What’s wrong with me? You’re the one cheating but here you are asking me what’s wrong with me? Seriously, what’s wrong with you? What am I? A toy hoped to get and soon get rid of?” 

“You’re out of your mind. Where the fuck did you get those ideas from?” 

“You’re gonna pretend you don’t know? Fine then” You hold your phone in front of him with the Dispatch article written about him and Winter. “Do you remember now?” 

Jungkook's confused expression changed to relief, which irritated her even more. In your idea, he was enjoying this and you didn't feel like being the clown. You paused and looked down, turning to wipe away some tears that had already formed in your eyes. Jungkook only noticed your tears when you turned to him again. 

“I wasted my time on you. When I heard you say you had feelings for me I never thought you’d be the reason for all my tears. Everything I wished for is everything I regret now. Falling in love with you was a mistake and I was a fool to believe you. I’m ending this right here. It’s over. Gosh I can’t believe I almost changed my life course for you.” You were crying now.  

“You’re in love with me?”  

“All I said that was the only thing your brain could retain? You’re a lost cause”- you huffed. 

“It’s everything it matters to me. Y/n I-- If you let me explain this wouldn't be happening. If you let me talk and trusted me a little bit more maybe this wouldn't be happening to this extent. Yes, I was out with Winter and yes, we went to that mall. She was helping me chose a gift for you and I was helping her doing the same thing for her girlfriend. I wanted to surprise you, that’s why I said I’d be in the studio the whole day. I was asking time to prepare this all for you"   

That’s when you stop on your tracks for a minute and see what’s around you. The floor with rose petals and candles showing the way to a set table. Red ballons everywhere and a “Will you be my girlfriend?” stuck in the wall. There was also soft music playing around the living room and a guitar near the couch. You didn't have any reaction, you didn't know what to say after the scandal you made and the way you spoke about him, so you stayed silent until he said something. 

“Just because you think you’re not enough for me, doesn’t mean it represents the truth. I’ve known Winter since trainee days. Also being an idol you meet a lot of people. I’m one of the few friends around her that knows she’s dating a girl and as you know Korea is still very close minded when it comes to these matters. In an event we had way before you and I were a thing she drank a little more than supposed to and spilled it out to me. Recently I told her I was with someone who has my whole heart and asked if she could help me do something you actually deserved. I love you Y/n. I’m in love with you and all I wanted was to give the princess time you should have. I’m sorry if you think I’d be capable to cheat or use you like that, but if you do then ---” 

“Don’t! Don’t finish that line. Jungkook, I’m so sorry I- You. I never felt this way about anyone. You were the one I always imagined myself with and I’m scared. I’m so fucking scared that I won’t be enough to keep you because you can have so much more. You’re everything I ever wanted. I’m sorry for fucking this up”  

Jungkook didn't say anything else just pulled her to him and hugged her tightly, then he moved away enough to touch his forehead to hers and kissed her. She kissed him back right away and things escalated from there. Stumbling through the house to his room, they left pieces of clothing behind.  

You’re so pretty,” his hands flitted across your skin. His hands held firmly onto your hips, clasping tightly before slowly letting his palms slide across your lower back. His arms ended up wrapping around your waist “I love you so much Y/n. Why did it take us so long to get here” His tone was pure sex and you were dripping wet. His lips connected with your collarbone first. Your lips fell apart as your hands wrapped around the back of his neck keeping him put where he showered you in kisses. Slowly he moved to you jaw and finally to your mouth again while his hands roamed through your body, stopping at your covered breasts, going down to your waist and hips. One of his hands went up again, going under your bra and squeezing it, while you lowered your hands to his belt and started to take it off so that it would be easier to take off his pants after. After getting rid of his clothing, he laid you down his bed, him being on top of you. He was so gentle and sweet and you were so turned on. You could feel Jungkook’s erection so you pressed onto him causing him to groan.  

Taking his time with you, slowly he started to go down your neck, taking off your bra and licking your breasts, going down to your waist and then your hips. At that part you sighed, you couldn't take this sensuality anymore. When you started to move, he pinned you down the bed, keeping you quiet while he starts taking off your panties. He opened your legs a little more so he could view what he was aiming to eat ever since you got to his house  

“You’re gonna be the death of me. You’re so sweet I could eat you all day and night. Your pussy is so perfect. You are perfect”. By the time he inserted two fingers inside you, you were a moaning mess, grabbing his hair for him to go even deeper than he was. After two orgasms you decided it was his turn to be blessed. Before he could move you back down, you were leaning forward, lips attacking his neck just under his jaw bone leaving a few marks here and there. You moved further down his lap to palm at his erection. You started slow, a soft glide down the length of his cock. “Fucking hell” he moaned 

You got down on your knees and slowly ran your tongue along his length, massaging it with your hand, then you put it in your mouth and started sucking it. From the noises he made you knew you were doing a good job. He was so sweet and so thick. “Stop-- ah – fuck- I wanna feel you around me before I cum.” You gave it a few more pumps until he grabbed your hair and pulled you back up. Reaching his bedside table, he took out a condom and put it on. Laying you back down he started kissing you again, putting two fingers inside of you again until he positioned his length and aligned it with your wet slit. His hand went over your hip while you’d let him slip inside you. You both moaned so loud but didn’t care for those who could hear it. He was so big and you were so tight you could feel him rip you in two. From that moment on it was pure mess. No one would say he was a monster in the sheets, pounding on you with no mercy. “Oh my – yeah yeah – like that ahhhhh- fuck fuck- you're so big. You fill me up so well Jungkook. Fuck I love your cock. I’m gonna-- ”  

“You’re delicious bug. Cum for me angel. Let me know how good i make you feel with this cock. I’m not gonna last long either” he moved faster, his hips meeting yours in an immeasurable force. You came first and then he reached his high too. he came out of you, laying down next to you. You laid your head on his chest and you stayed like that for a while in complete silence until he broke it “Are you okay?” he asked, kissing your forehead. “I’m perfect bunny. How are you?” 

“I’m great. Have the girl of my dreams in my arms, what else could I ask for?” he stepped back a little so he could face you on his side “I love you Y/n. Even though this was not the way I wanted to do things I want you to be mine. Just mine. I don’t share and I’m jealous and I know I'll do a lot of mistakes but I’m all in if you are.” 

“I was always yours, even when you didn't know. I’m yours. Forever. I’m sorry for everything i said before. I was really unfair. I know you’d never do anything to hurt me on purpose”.  

“It’s okay. I’m sorry too, for the way I handled things.” you said lying down in each other's embrace until you said you had to take a shower, asking him if he wanted to keep you company. Needless to say, the answer was yes, with the right to a second round. In the end, you went to eat what he had prepared with so much care, put away the dishes and watched a movie which lasted a maximum of 10 minutes, as after that your mouth was already in another more interesting place, taking the rest to the bedroom and out into the night. 

Luckily for both of you, the next day was your day off. That morning you woke up sore as hell but didn’t mind it. You got up slowly so you wouldn’t wake Jungkook, you saw his shirt on the floor and put it on and went to the kitchen to prepare breakfast. You were making pancakes since you know he loves them. You tried to make as little noise as possible so he wouldn’t notice and you could surprise him. You were so focused that you didn't hear the footsteps behind you and suddenly felt arms circling your waist. 

“Hmmm... Smells amazing baby. I’m getting hungry” Jungkook said while leaving soft kisses on your neck. “It was supposed to be surprise! You shouldn’t be downstairs yet” You poutted. As soon as you finished the last pancake, jungkook turned you around and placed you on the counter. “I noticed you weren't next to me and I missed you. Spent so long away from you that now I want to enjoy every moment with you while we can. Besides, there's something about you that made me addicted. Your smell, your kisses, your pu--”  

“Okay loverboy, that’s enough. We need to get clean and eat the pancakes I made with so much love. Also I need to talk to you about something.” Jungkook frowned, but obeyed. Both went to take a quick shower, got dressed and went to eat. As you were finishing you cleared your throat “So... remember yesterday when I said I almost changed my life course?” Jungkook nooded, sipping on his banana milk “Well what I meant by that was – I -- I auditioned for your dance team and got selected. I was asked if I wanted to renew my contract with SKZ and I said no. I remember you asking me if I’d work for you and kept thinking about it. Hobi told me Hybe was going to open a dance contest to enter the dance team and I tried my luck. When I signed up, I didn't use my name, but rather a nickname so if you saw something you wouldn't know I had participated, influencing any decision. Are you mad?”  

The news left Jungkook with a mix of emotions. He already had mentioned to the members that it was being extremely hard to balance work and the fact that he was always away from you. When he asked you if you would see yourself working with them and you said no, he was sad but understood. Knowing this was a topic you considered made him feel chosen and loved. It wasn't your responsibility to change your choices but you still decided to do it to be not only him but with the rest of the members. Deep down he knows it was more because of him, because of your relationship. 

Out of nowhere, he gets up and goes to a table and opens the small drawer there and takes out a small red velcro box, picks it up and heads towards you. 

 “This was supposed to happen yesterday but with all rhat chaos there was no opportunity, so here we go. Will you be my girlfriend?” when he opens the box, you feel like the happiest woman in the world. Inside were two promise rings, one for you and one for him. You belonged to each other and it was fantastic your partnership. Despite some hassles and disagreements, you always found the balance to understand each other. There were days when you gave 60% and he gave 40%, other days he gave 70% and you gave 30% and everything was fine. You understood each other that way because your relationship began based on friendship, respect and communication. 

After the misunderstanding with Winter, you swore to yourself that you wouldn't make the same mistake again, always trying to clarify everything before jumping to hasty conclusions. In fact, after some time you had the opportunity to meet her and she was pretty great, you two became really good friends. She even helped you guys move to the house Jungkook was building back then. 

Regarding your work place, you did switch to Hybe. You know that you got there on your own merit and you were happy for that and the fact that you were able to be close to your boyfriend and your friends made that a lot easier to handle all the pressure coming from it. You and Jungkook announced your relationship shortly after and although it was complicated at first, the chemistry between you was so strong that even his fans became yours and soon they were shipping you both.  

After BTS world tour ends, you and Jungkook would go on vacation. Little do you know he's going to ask you to marry him and little does he know that you're going to give him some news that will change your life forever. Definitely the best happily ever after for you, Jungkook and the little one forming inside you.

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Thank you to everyone who read it all. Thank you for all your sweet messages and huge support. I love you! I'll see you soon <3

@fangirl9990 @joonlover1207

[novascharms]

teach please me — tutor!reader x soccer player!rafe

reader's life is meticulously planned, from high school to becoming president of the country—she knows exactly where she's headed and every step to get there. but her airtight plan hits a snag when the principal ropes her into tutoring rafe cameron, the school’s star soccer player, who’s failing algebra and at risk of being benched next season. the team needs him on the field, and reader needs the principal’s glowing recommendation to secure her spot at her dream school. balancing her ambitious goals with rafe’s chaotic charm might just throw her perfectly crafted plan off track.

a.n — double update cause it's a short one + apology for the contents of this chapter word count — 1.4 chapter index — prev. chap. — next chap. masterlist

seven wednesday, january 29th

"no, i'm telling you, it's real! i read about it." devon pulls on hazel's arms as the four of you walk toward your school building. "someone talking about it in a tiktok video is not reading about it, devon." ivy laughs and devon shoves her to the side. "you believe me, right, y/n?" she turns to you and you're in this weird inbetween place where you can hear them, sort of but your mind is also in a million other places so you don't immediately answer.

"hey?" hazel rests an arm on your shoulder which halts you, "hm?" you ask and look at your three very concerned best friends. "you know we don't have to go, right? we can just..go to my house, get all the strawberry ice cream from the freezer and have a long discussion about ..cryptozoology. devon can tell us about that time she saw the loch ness monster again." she says and you smile when devon mutters something about her experience being 100% real.

"you have a perfect attendance, hazel. we are not going to tarnish that for..a boy. i'm okay." you try to sound convincing, try to convince yourself even because really, it shouldn't suck as much as it does. you knew that rafe somehow reciprocating your crush was wishful thinking. it was stupid to ever even entertain or let the idea play in your mind.

you'd had crushes before, even kissed two guys. once when you were fourteen and once when you were fifteen but looking at them never felt the same way as looking at rafe and you had never even come close to kissing him.

"but—"

"no. let's go." you force the three girls forward. you were first in your class, first in your entire grade, you singlehandedly organise almost every major and minor event at this school, you process all the complaints and changes students want almost weekly, you help your parents at home, you work at a bakery on saturdays, you volunteer on sundays. you are resilient and capable and rafe cameron is not going to bat his eyelashes and break you in one month of knowing him. it just wasn't going to happen. it couldn't.

you could avoid him, you think as you walk into the school building. right? this school was fairly big and truth be told, before you started tutoring, rafe didn't really stand out to you. things could go back to that time. they had too.

the first four hours went perfectly. you passed by the office and helped sandy with some paperwork until class started, then you went to class and were able to avoid him during the break as well.

you got nervous when lunchtime came around. you and your friends usually stayed in school during lunch which meant rafe could just walk up to you in the cafeteria but there were other places you could go. you could go to the green spaces or the common area. maybe even the bleachers in the basketball court though you never really liked the smell in there.

you eventually chose the green space. it was quiet and calm, just what you needed. you and your friends sat down and when you open your bag you realise you left your lunch in your locker. "i left my lunch in my locker, i'll be right back." you tell them and fish your key out of your bag before making your way out of the green space and down the stairs.

when you made it to the second floor, you walked to your locker, keys jiggling in your hands. "y/n?" your heart stopped at the sound of his voice, and the natural course of action when someone called your name was to stop or at least turn but you just kept walking. "uh huh?" you answered.

"hey, hold on!" he called and you heard him start to jog. you start to walk faster. "i..uhh am kinda in a hurry!"

"just wait." he grabs your wrist and whips you around. he looks unjustifiable good again. you force yourself to not make eye contact. "yes, rafe?" you find yourself saying in the most passive tone and his gaze lingers, filled with worry. "what happened yesterday? i texted you like ten times." he's visibly upset—crease between his brows, soft searching eyes boring it yours and it makes you upset and now you want to pinch yourself for being upset because you've created some kind of fucked up parasocial relationship with a guy who has no real interest in you.

"i..just wanted to go home. so, i went home." is the only thing you can come up with. it's technically the truth too. you pull your wrist away from his hand and he watches the action with a pained expression. "did something happen while i was gone? why didn't you come to me? i was going to take you home."

you shake your head nonchalantly dismissing him, "it's fine. i like walking, i barely exercise so i need it. it's absolutely fine." you're already turning around to find your locker but he's grabbing your wrist again, "why are you acting like this?" he's frustrated with you. you understand. you're acting different but you're frustrated with him too. even if you don't necessarily have the right to be. "you know i'm not that smart so stop playing fucking mind games with me."

you frown at his tone but also his choice of words. "you are smart, rafe. you're very smart." you correct, not liking it when he belittled himself. him not believing he was capable or smart was the whole reason he needed tutoring in the first place.

"yet i can't piece together why you're mad at me." he says, his tone displeased and you shake your head, finding his eyes. you find yourself wanting to appease him, wanting to make him feel better. you hate that he's upset, it coils something deep inside of you. "i am not mad. i'm not upset, i just..i didn't want to—" it was baffling how much you struggled to come up with a lie. you weren't a liar, okay? "i-i saw you, i saw..that you were, you were.. and i j-just—" you stammered and threw your head back in frustration.

he stared at you, eyes wide and expecting. "you just..what? how am i meant to fix it if you won't tell me what's wrong?"

"you haven't done anything wrong; if anything it's me. i—"

"you what? you didn't have fun? did someone hurt you?"

"no one did anything." you murmur and it seems to be what pushes him over the edge, "then what's wrong?" he snaps, his apparent annoyance bursting at the seams.

"nothing is wrong. there is nothing to fix, i just wanted to go home so i went home!" you yelled suddenly and rafe along with the couple of people still in the hallway stared at you in what could only be describe as utter surprise. "sorry..i'm sorry." you tried to collect whatever pride you still had and turned on your heel abandoning your food completely.

it started slowly. just slow breaths as you walked up the stairs, then that pit in your throat when you were on the third floor, followed by tears in your eyes that you were frantically trying to blink away on the fourth floor, and when you finally made it to green space, the tears were streaming down your cheeks and hazel was already standing up before you'd even made it to the table. "oh, no, sweetheart," she's pulling you in your arms and the dam just breaks and you're letting out everything you'd been holding in since that stupid bonfire. "it's okay, i'm so sorry, you're okay." her comforting whispers and gentle kisses are muffled and overshadowed by the way you're crying in her arms.

you feel ivy and devon's hands on your back, rubbing slow circles, "we got you," you feel a warm hug from behind and one on the side. you're completely cooped up, unable to even see anymore light, just little cracks. either way your vision is blurry with tears. "i w-wanna go h-home.." you hiccup in hazel's neck and you can feel her nodding. "we'll go home. we're going home."

hazel's parents are surprised to see the four of you home but when they see which state you're in, they barely question it. her mom orders take out, the junkiest junk food they can find, she calls your mom to tell her where you are, you pile onto the couch and they don't mention rafe once. you have a six-hour-long discussion about cryptozoology and the science behind mythical creatures.

chapter index — prev. chap. — next chap. taglist — @rafeysworldim19 @my-name-is-baby @pogueprincesa let me know if you'd like to be added to the taglist & interact with post to remain tagged <3

[moosesarecute]

Chapter 3: The Shadow to my Flame

Series masterlist

masterlist

Relief filled Ashe’s body as she let her friend in through the door before she closed it.

“You scared me for a second there,” she told him.

Eris had already sat down on her bed, head leaning against the wall and eyes closed.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to,” he answered. “It’s just been a rough day.”

Ashe sat down on the other side of the bed with her legs crossed. They just sat in silence for a little while. Eris never wanted her to ask and pry about his feelings. He would talk when he was ready, and that wasn’t yet.

Eris had saved her from one soldier once. The soldier had refused to let her go, even though she said no. He wanted her, and that wasn’t anything new. She would usually just let them have their way, but that day she had just started her cycle. While most males found that disgusting, that male didn’t care. It was almost like it made him want her more. Eris had randomly walked by and punched the male in the face. Eris had then helped Ashe into a warm bath.

Eris would since come to her room about once a week. Not to have sex as most the of soldiers thought, but to speak freely. Both of them.

It was terrifying at first, but eventually Ashe started to look forward to it. Their conversations were casual and safe.

“I got them out,” Eris started to speak. “The mother and her children. I helped them over the border to Summer.”

“That’s amazing, Eris.”

Eris abruptly stood up.

“They shouldn’t need to leave, Ashe! They should be able to live here as normal.”

She knew he wasn’t angry at her, but she also knew that he couldn’t show his true feelings to anyone that wasn’t her. So, she let him speak.

She listened to him as he poured his heart out. He was pacing in her small room, and every time he got close to the closet, Ashe got scared he would somehow know about the money and letter inside. Each time he turned to pace back the other direction, she felt like she could breathe again.

“I’m sorry.”

After each and every rant, Eris would end by saying sorry. Ashe had stopped telling him that it was alright, he didn’t listen to her anyway.

“How’s work?”

It was now Ashe’s turn. And she was so ready to speak about everything. But at the same time, she really wanted to read what was in the letter from Shadow.

“Honestly, I’m just tired. The amount of work is so much more than before and it’s exhausting.”

Eris’ eyes softened a little as she spoke. It was usual for him to react that way when she spoke. He never wore pity in his eyes. Only guilt.

“Do they pay you more?”

“Yeah, but still not a lot. It’s okay though. I don’t need more money.”

She thought about the money from Shadow. It must have been at least the same amount she would get for two months of work. It was crazy. It must have been a mistake. That was the only reason Ashe could think of.

Eris nodded gravely at her words.

“Chess?”

They spent the rest of the evening playing chess and card-games. Eris had eventually retreated to his own room and Ashe could finally read the letter. She ran and pulled it out the second Eris had left her room.

Thank you so much, Flame. I can assure you we are currently working on figuring out the most effective ways to help.

My High Lord has decided to join the ball Beron is hosting. Will you be there? If yes, you need to make sure you have a safe place to go to if something rather unfortunate happens. (We are not planning anything, but we don’t trust anyone.)

I have sent some money for you as payment for your help. I hope you will continue to share information with me.

Stay safe,

Shadow

And then it suddenly dawned on Ashe that she somehow had become a paid spy for the Night Court.

Ashe slept surprisingly well that night and when she woke up, she felt relaxed and well-rested.

That was until Maria came knocking on her door saying that the High Lord was calling them in for inspection.

Absolute terror filled her body.

Her hair. She hadn’t dyed her hair. She let Maria stand in the open door as she ran to her mirror. Her roots were definitely red. Her dark brown hair didn’t hide it one bit.

“Oh, dear,” Maria said with pity in her voice. “Well, there’s no time to fix it now. Come here.”

Ashe’s shoulders slumped as she walked to Maria. Maria lifted a kitchen towel she had at her waist and tied it around Ashe’s hair.

“Maybe he is less observant than usual,” she said to make Ashe’s anxiety less. It didn’t help.

They walked together with multiple other servants and went to the throne room.

The High Lord was seated at his throne, his wife sat beside him. The room started to fill up with all servants, gardeners and cooks. They stood in four long rows and waited for the High Lord to make his round. Ashe and Maria stood in the middle of the second row.

The High Lord stood from his throne, and it felt like everybody stopped breathing.

He walked slowly, almost too slowly. He stopped before each and every person. He gave some critic, but most of them he just walked past. Ashe saw him pass multiple others with similar scarfs or towels around their heads. He asked none of them to remove it. It made her calm down a little.

He started on the second row. Ashe immediately felt her back straightened. She needed to look proud. He had to see that she was proud of working for him. But at the same time, she couldn’t be too proud. She was a servant after all.

The High Lord stopped before her. She kept her back straight, but her gaze was on the ground. She gave him a small curtsy, just like everyone else had. She felt his gaze burning into her.

“Remove your headscarf.”

His intimidating voice gave her chills, but it was his command that terrified her. He would see it. He most definitely would.

She almost hesitated, but she knew it would only make it worse. She wanted to argue. To scream at him. Why did she have to remove her scarf? None of the others had to.

Luckily, she wasn’t brave enough.

Ashe lifted her hand and removed the towel from her hair.

It only took the High Lord a second before his new command came.

“Show me your arms.”

Her heart sunk. Why? Why did she have to be the first to mess up.

It didn’t matter. She did what he told her to do. She rolled up the sleaves of her dress and showed him both of her forearms. They were already covered in scars and burn marks. Some of the burn marks were from herself, but most of them were punishments.

He didn’t hesitate as he released his power and burned both her arms. The pain spread through her body. Her vision blackened for a few seconds, but for some unknown reason she managed to stand on her feet. Tears build in her eyes, but she didn’t scream. She did not scream.

“You have until tomorrow to dye your hair.”

“Yes, my lord.”

He finally moved to Maria.

Ashe had to stay in the throne room for another hour. Only two more people were punished, and both were new. Unlike Ashe, who had not only grown up as a servant, but also work there for over 150 years. She was so humiliated.

Maria shoved her back to her room. In silence, she put cooling cream over Ashe’s forearms and carefully dyed her hair. She gave Ashe a small squeeze when she finished.

“You can take the Lady this evening. Relax until then.”

Ashe couldn’t to anything but thank her.

That evening it was only planned a small dinner. Meaning, the Lady of Autumn needed minimal help. Ashe had combed through her hair and was using her powers to heat up the small iron-stick as the Lady started to speak.

“You’re brave.”

Ashe almost stopped her task in confusion. Did wasn’t unusual for the Lady to come with such compliments, but it felt unnatural.

“Thank you, my lady,” Ashe answered.

She then picked up one section of her hair and wrapped it around the hot iron-stick. She counted to three and let loose the curl. She continued to the next part of hair. Her forearms were still filled with burn marks that were hurting her, but the quicker she finished the Lady’s hair, the quicker she could go back hiding in her room.

“How old are you now Ashe?”

“160 years, my lady.”

The Lady nodded. She seemed in deep thoughts that evening. Ashe felt herself hope that the High Lord hadn’t done anything bad. But at the same time, she knew it was unlikely that he hadn’t.

“Have you thought about marriage? Or been in love?”

The question caught Ashe off guard. It wasn’t often the Lady would ask such personal questions. It happened once in a while.

“No, my lady. I’m afraid been a servant takes up most of my time.”

The Lady nodded once more.

“I really hope you do find love, Ashe.”

Ashe found herself agreeing before she could even think twice.

Love.

They spent the rest of the time in silence. It was first after Ashe had given her curtsey and was on her way out before the Lady spoke once more.

Ashe was so ready to go to bed, so being stopped was kind of annoying. However, she didn’t let her true emotions show.

“Yes, my Lady?”

The Lady had moved over to one of the draws in her room. She opened it and pulled out a small box.

“I want you to take this. It makes the wounds scar less.”

Ashe couldn’t do anything but take the box. As she walked out of the Lady’s cambers, she felt both embarrassed that the Lady had seen her being in such pain, but also happy that she got some help.

Let me know if you want to be tagged!

Dividers by: @saradika-graphics

[curlyshepardconfirmed]

Curly Shepard headcannons right now

Oh my fuck where do I start

Putting ts under the cut or whatever it's called so the hoard doesn't rage at me

Well the first one is that Curly is his legal name bc Tim knew that he and Angela were gonna be twins but he was planning for two girls, so he had Angela's name picked out already but when Curly showed up he just stood there like 🧍‍♂️. looked at his hair and then named him Curly the rest is history

Oh yeah and he and Angela are twins and he's older by two minutes but everyone thinks it's Angela who's older because he doesn't act the most mature (he's immature as FUCK) but he likes rubbing it in Angela's face

AUDhd, definitely hyperactive and inattentive but it's the 60s so his dad just said he was too stupid and decided to homeschool him and that ended with him getting beat more often than not

He helped Tim kill his dad the day that things got out of hand, and honestly to this day he's had no qualms about it whatsoever since he'd never seen that man as a father more than he did a beast.

Curly's extremely sensitive about his hair because hes always sort of associated touch with pain, especially because his dad didn't know how to take care of his type of hair, he'd fuck him up in the bathroom after getting frustrated with the tangles and knots and curls. Tim took over the hair routines for Curly and Angela once he found Curly alone in a bubble bath with bruises and a comb stuck in his hair unaware of how long his little brother had been in there

Curly drinks, not as much as Angela does, but certainly enough for it to be concerning. He's only really able to regulate how much he drinks because it reminds him of his father, the things he'd do while drunk.

He's liked Ponyboy since they were young but he's also the kind of little shit to bully him because he likes him. Like he'd dump ice down the back of his shirt and run off and throw sticks at him but then the two became friends and eventually boyfriends though curly went fucking crazy when pony dated Cathy btw.

He won't ever admit it but he despises it when he's alone. He hates being alone more than anything, it's why he starts as many fights as he does. You'll never find Curly alone, he's always trailing someone or hanging out with his friends or with Angela

He is such a fucking tattletale man and I'm pretty sure this is canon bc he told on Dally to Tim about his tires. Tim knows basically anything Curly knows so the few months where he wouldnt tell Tim about ponyboy it was kinda concerning

He is the funniest and whiniest mf when he's injured like someone will dial the shepard house phone like hey can curly hang out and he'll be like no but i can sit the fuck down and wait for you to come over and people will get mad at him for the obvious attitude but he won't give a flying fuck bc he'll point out that he's injured and whine abt it so Tim and Angela are just stuck with the nuisance taking up the couch and milking the injury as long as he can

When its actually serious though, Curly would ignore all his injuries if he wants to go to a rumble, or if Tim needed help, or if the gang needed help

Uhhhh I'm sure i have more somewhere but you can just ask me specifics I really don't care I'll answer any asks as long as they're not weird

[teddywesworl]

ok elaborating on this. trying to explain what i mean by a cipher. because it's about tone and genre expectations, but it's also more than that.

your first paragraph (or two) is the framework through which the rest of the work is interpreted. consider:

these four lines of text provide the following information:

this is an "Illario forgiven" fic

Lucanis and Spite have been arguing about this decision, but

"pieces are moving into place," i.e. there is a plan afoot which Spite is allowing to proceed without resistance out of respect, but

other Crows are causing trouble in a way that tells Lucanis they don't respect him.

the scene is set. however, this information leaves us with the following questions:

why did this version of Lucanis forgive Illario?

what plan is afoot? what pieces are moving into place?

which Crows are causing trouble? and how?

and these questions are the basis for the rest of the fic. if you are reading at all closely, you will have them in the back of your mind from the very start. you will be waiting for answers. you will, hopefully, be looking for answers before they are explicitly revealed. you may even clue in to the idea that each question may be answered in more than one way, and some answers may only be implied. the important thing is that a skilled reader is primed to look.

the 'cipher' here, the key that you are being asked to use to decode the rest of the story, is the very presence of unanswered questions about action and plot.

this is an appropriate cipher for this fic, which is structured like a heist or an intrigue. think of the way heists are often intercut in ways that withhold information in a way that is immensely satisfying to watch when the information is eventually revealed.

consider:

this opener presents, in some ways, a much simpler cipher. the first sentence is a classic "hook," a snappy little one-liner which is then expounded upon in the following paragraph. questions are left unanswered (who was that guy? and what exactly did he do to 17 year old ashur?), but they are questions about character beats, and they land differently.

the point of this opener is less to ask questions and more to provide an emotional foundation for everything that follows. this is the story of a man who has been hurt in a very specific way. this wound will affect the way he acts and the emotional catharsis he achieves for the rest of the story. this single paragraph is the key to understanding this specific character. you will get more out of the story if you hold this paragraph in your mind throughout.

this is an appropriate cipher for a slow-paced character study with less focus on plot and more on emotional beats. think of a prestige drama that starts with a prologue that might feel disconnected from the main storyline, until the story progresses and characters reveal more of themselves.

consider:

this is a heavy worldbuilding opener, which can be appropriate for dense high fantasy if there's a good enough reason to provide that information from the jump. do we need this info right now? is this info useful context to interpret what follows?

without spoiling my entire novel, the most important sentence in this paragraph is the last one: "There was no written record to corroborate such a claim, only the oral tradition of the local grandmothers."

that's the cipher; that's the key to understanding everything that follows. i want you reading this novel with the knowledge in the back of your mind that a conquered people has an oral tradition which is in conflict with written records.

these are obviously just three examples, and there are uncountable ways to effectively begin a story. But: that first paragraph establishes much more than you may realize, and it colors your reader's interpretation of everything after it. Take advantage of that opportunity to say something about the story you're writing and put up some damn set dressing. peace and love

honestly the most life changing bit of writing technique i've applied to my work in the last few years is: first paragraph as thesis statement. or maybe first paragraph as cipher? or lens? in any case, the very first paragraph (or page, or chapter) has the power to prime the reader to interpret the rest of the work in a certain way, with an eye out for certain elements.

likewise, if you are a skilled reader, you can pull a lot of information out of a well-crafted first paragraph, and you can take that information with you as you engage with the rest of the story.

this is why it drives me sort of insane now when a story starts with dialogue or a character waking up in the morning or similar. experienced writers harp on about the importance of the first sentence as a hook to get the reader invested, but it's just as much about (hello sorry im obsessed with the psychology of storytelling) influencing the way the reader engages with everything that comes after it

anyway happy wip wednesday here's the beginning of first talon lucanis fic

and the beginning of the ashur pov companion to other masks

and the first paragraph of the novel (im not fully 100% sold on this one but it sure does provide the cipher)

call this an invitation to post first paragraphs for wip wednesday, if you wannaaaa

[liriostigre]

hi there! hope you're having a great day <3

i love all the art and artists you mention in your quizzes (secretly very excited for if u post a 2024 one), i was just wondering if you have any favourite tumblr accounts that post about art?

thank you! 💘

Hiii 💐 thanks so much for appreciating my quizzes!

I don't really follow art blogs, I follow personal blogs very similar to my main blog, so my mutuals also have tags for art, muisc, film, literature, etc. That's how I discover some artists/art on Tumblr, but it's mainly the Wikipedia app for me 🥰!!! When you read an article about an artist you like you'll see links to other artists and links related to the art movements or sometimes the artist's influences, mentors, relatives, friends, lovers. I spend hours reading Wikipedia articles (which obviously come with images lol) until I don't remember what was the article I started with 😬

My answer got too long so check under the cut, but basically if something catches my eye I always look it up on the internet! Always!!!

I always check out artists (not only visual arts) mentioned in the books I read. These are some I highlighted in The Savage Detectives and Of Human Bondage:

Another source for me is albums cover art, so I always research those. Here are some faves:

There are always a lot of art references in movies too (again, not only visual arts; it could be a character reading/mentioning a book or even the soundtrack), so one thing leads to another and that's how I discover art in general.

I also watch and read interviews of musicians, writers and filmmakers, and I'm always checking the Genius lyrics annotations and I watch/read/ listen to what they mention/reference. So I get pretty good books and movies recs. A few examples:

Sorry I couldn't rec blogs but I hope this was helpful anyway 💌