#i wasnt going to post these but im very pleased with how this one came out so im making it all your problems aldnaksk

[cactusmisslittle]

I make very normal secret santa withers gifts

Made for @beesht 💚

[bloodygyaruuu]

The Sworn Partners for God's Sake

i am SOOOO ecstatic w/ how this came out! i decided to participate in @das-a-kirby-blog 's DTIYS since i needed some fun artistic challenge in my life. i will put all my thoughts below the cut because i need to yap but please look at this image for atleast 5 seconds since i spent like 25 hours on it <3

sketching this alone took some thought since i had to adjust the canvas multiple times to make sure everything fit properly. i've never drawn alot of these characters ngl, so i was a bit nervous going in so suddenly. i wanted to make all the past villians more, well, villainous looking so i just added some crazed expression and dynamic poses. i especially like how i did susie ngl. like shes giggling so wickedly i love. i gave kirby a more confused expression while bandee is in his usual worried state of mind. i also decided to make meta and dedede make sexual eye contact as lovers sworn partners. however... i decided to take dark crafter and yinyarn out back before telling them to close their eyes because, tbh, i really dont give a fuck about either of them. marx and magolor felt like much more fitting choices in the section of past kirby antagonist as i would consider them far more impactful (and fun to draw) than the ladder pair. also added blade knight cuz sword knight was there and he wasnt?? smh. oh and vul is smoking lmao.

the hardest thing in this entire piece was the line art. originally i did all my lines in black just because it's easier on the eyes when crafting all the pieces together before i layer a blue merge layer on top. i questioned whether or not to use the lineart as both eye-black and metal highlight/shadow but im incredibly happy with the result.

coloring became a tricky subject since my art utilizes very bright, vibrant colors with high chroma. i wanted to stay true to the og by only using the base colors but just... tweaking them a lil bit. i cant resist a good highlight in my art. when it came to nightmare and meta's cape, i am a longtime subscriber to the hc that meta is like his "son" in a way so i wanted to make a nod to that by making the gradient and star-design pattern of their cloaks the same.

to be honest, this was so much fun. but holy SHIT my back is on fire. shoutout to anyone who actually read this monstrosity of an artist's explanation, ur a real one. thank you guys so much for ur support and ill see yall eventually with another dumb kirby post <3.

[itsss4t4n]

How long is Forever? - Harry Hook x daughter of alice in wonderland

Headcanons but the longer version of this post:

a/n: this is based more on tim burtons aiw adaptation as it is the only one that i know, and i might have misremembered some of the story/ characters so i apologize if its inaccurate to wonderland or its characters in any way. I got way to invested in creating the character and story and almost forgot that that wasnt the point. At some point i think the character just completely changes and i low key hate it. Im really bad at writing headcannons instead of full fledged fics.

Trigger warnings: fighting, she /her pronouns used, slight angst toward the end but happy ending, not proofread

-being alices daughter you are considered kind of weird by the aks, (think luna lovegood), you are kind of dreamy and constantly in your own thoughts but you still have a very strong own opinion on everything. You say what you think even if others might not like that. 

-You also have a very different sense of style than most girls in auradon. You played alot with different colours and textures always looking slightly crazy (you took inspiration from your godfather, the mad hatter). Your blonde hair was cut to a short messy bob with short bangs, and always changing coloured streaks throughout.

-you dont have the same view of good and bad as most others , and you dont think the vks should be judged by what their parents did and immediately try to befriend them and continuesly defend them

-when mal runs away to the isle you insist on joining the other vks and ben, as you do well in new and different invironments and later because you are an incredible sword fighter, your mother having thought you all she knows, just in case you ever needed to fight a jabberwookie type beast yourself.

-Due to your personal style not being very auradon, you didnt really have to disguise as much as ben when going to the isle. 

-On the isle you felt surprisingly comfortable, as you liked the weird and almost liminal athmosphere that it had 

-the first time you met harry was right after bens kidnapping, when harry came to tell you all about it.

-Harry has this theatrical almost a little eccentric way of talking and moving, which intruiged you pretty quickly. Of course , You didnt like or trust him, he did just kidnap one of your best friends, but you were intruiged non the less.

"And who is this little lassy?"

You told him your name with a glint of interest and mischif in your eyes. "Daughter of Alice in Wonderland."

"How interesting."

"I was just thinking the same thing. Whats your Name?"

"Harry Hook." He introduced himself with adramatic bow, before making fun of jay and barking at carlos.

- The other three had watched the interaction in confusion and wonder. They knew you were a little odd but seeming this confortable with harry after knowing what he did to ben?

"What was that?!" 

"What?" 

"Dont be nice to hook! He just kidnapped your best friend!"

"yea.. But he is quite interesting." And as an afterthougt: "and kind of pretty dont you think?"

"NO! Concentrate please. He is the enemie alright?!"

"Yea whatever, lets go tell mal about this shit."

-You go with Mal and evie to see dizzy, and instantly get along.

-Later while Mal and Uma are talking (singing), you cant help your eyes from glancing over at harry every few seconds. He did look good, with his red coat, the old silver jook on his left hand, and the messy black eyeshadow around his striking blue eyes.

"He is really beutiful dont you think?" That question was mostly directed towards evie who just shot you a dissapproving look. "I'm just saying. purely aesthetically."

-You simply shrugged and watched the situation continue to unfold, swordhand on the hilt of your sword at your side. When the fight breaks out you stand against harry. For better of for forse.

"Hello Pretty boy." You raise you swordand get into a defensive position.

"Wonderland girl."

-You kept making little comments about his looks and his sword fighting which he of course returned in his own flirty way. You quite enjoyed going back and forth like that. Witty comments, smirks and flirty smiles, and fighting more for show at this point instead of actually trying to beat each other. Trying to make this surprisingly pleasant moment last as long as possible.

-until you heard an urgend shout of your name from Mal.

"Sorry in advance." In a quick movement you snatched harrys hook and threw it down into the water. Before a shoked Harry can jump after it you catch his arm and talk to him in a slightly hushed voice.

"I really hope this wasnt our last meeting pretty boy." Before running off with the others.

-You dont see each other again until Audrey turns evil, but you do still think about harry. Is it stupid considering you met like twice and he was you enemy? Yea. Did you care? not really. He was georgeous, funny, good with a sword. Your dream guy. Except for the fact that he was supposedly your enemy. but then again when had you ever cared about that kinda stuff.

-His black lined blue piercing eyes were burned into your brain.

-In the six months until you saw him again you had become mal and bens unofficial bodyguard, spening most of your time with them or with evie, your sword has taken permanent residence at your side, only taking it of to sleep or shower and even then it was always in grabbing distance. Mals paranoia about uma had actually started to get to you.

-You are at evies house when audrey shows up and spells mal. You join them in going back to the isle to retrieve hades ember.

-When your bikes get stolen you cant help but smile at the sight. Yea its shitty but he is still beautiful.

"Pretty boy!"

He drawls you name in his scottish accent and you mentally swoon.

"Thats my bike!"

"Oh yea? Come and get it back then." Before driving of.

-You run after them (except mal and celia ofc),and at one point you split upbecause the boys on the bikes did so. You follow harry and when the others are out of sight he slows to a stop. You catch up to him with a grin.

"Nice to see you again Hook. I was hoping we would meet again."

"I was too Lassie."

-The next 10-ish minutes are filled with flirty banter and tales of what happened in the last six months. It felt like you've known each other for years (as clichee as that sounds). 

-You almost forgot why you were there until you heard jay shouting your name.

"Where are you, Mal got the thing come on."

You quickly turn to Harry again.

"Go! Before they see you and make it a whole thing."

"What bout your bike?"

"Keep it pretty boy, i doubt the others got theirs back so it would be weird if i did."

With a last sly grin harry leans towards you "I will see you again very soon." 

Before you could question what 'very soon' meant, he had already driven of. 

Just in time because Jay and the others turned the corner behind you.

"There you are! What are you doing? come on!"

"Sorry. Was chasing after the bike." You Give them a small smile before walking past them. "You coming?"

-To say you were surprised when harry and gil jumped through the barries after them would be an understatement.

"Pretty boy?!"

"'ello Darling. we're just coming for a wee visit" 

-You tried , just like evie, to get the two groups to work together. Harry mostly walked next to you or Uma. At some point you hung back so he culd walk in between you and doesnt have to kep switching. He caught up with uma but still kept the constant flirts towards you up.

-Everyone was really confused on why you two seemed so good and almost comfortable around each other, not to mention the flirting. Evie was the only one who knew of your little crush so she send you a few knowing smirks.

-During the knight fight you and harry fought as a team. Incedibly well might i say. 

-You were somewhat enthusiastic about evies icebreaker idea, enjoying the idea that the two groups could finally work together.

"Harry great accent."

"Shes right. It is a good accent."

-The flirting just wouldnt stop, comments thrown at each other, bumping shoulders while walking, even brushing your hands against each others on occasion. You had joined the boys in looking for ben.

"To make sure jay and harry dont kill each other."

-Gil doing the icebreaker and bonding with jay. 

meanwhile you and harry in the background:

"We should do that icebreaker pretty boy."

"oh yea?"

"Yea. You've got really pretty eyes."

"And you are really good with a sword lass." His hook just slightly gracing your cheek before something in gil and jays conversation sparks his interest.

-When finding ben you had immediately pushed harry behind you and unsheathed your sword out of instinct. Jay has to pull both of you out of bens way because both of you got distrcated by how close you were standing to each other. After making sure ben was alright you made sure harry was too.

(instead of flirting with jane he flirts with you)

"Well well well, thank you for trying to protect me there darling." The hook was under you chin this time.

"No problem pretty boy." You smirk back.

Ben had his little freak out. Jay and carlos had one too for slightly different reasons.

"when did this happen? you and hook?"

You just shrugged and started walking off.

The boys just looked at eachother thouroghly confused.

-After everyone reuniting and you secretely updating evie on the harry situation you all made your way to fairy cottage. When you found chad you had to half hide in harrys shoulder to hide your laughter because god was it good to see chad taken down a few pecks like that.

-Then Mal dropped the bomb. Closing the barrier forever. You couldnt believe it. You were always a firm believer in the vk programm. And you had honestly hoped that even if harry etc were send back, they would get out someday, or you might go visit them. You considered them freinds at that point. But now that wasnt possible.  You tried to comfort harry and uma in some way but it was to no avail.

"Im so sorry you guys... I didnt know." You had tears in your eyes yourself.

"Dont worry about it Darling. Its nae your fault." Placing his hand, his actual hand, on your cheek for a second, to wipe away the tear that had fallen. Before he walked of with uma.

"Harry....."

Mal was shocked to see your tears at the fact that harry was leaving. she had absolutely no idea this was a thing. It wasnt really. you didnt have enough time for it to actually become a thing. You watched harry and uma leave before evie walked up to you to hug you. 

She talked to mal but you didnt want to listen.

suddenly there was a bright light before it went dark for a bit. When you came to again, Mal was gone. It didnt take you guys long to piece together what must have happened. so you went to find mal.

-You and harry were both incredibly relieved to see that the other was okay. *cue big hug and an almost kiss that turned into a kind of awkward cheek kiss before another hug * 

-Harry announcing that he is actually going back to the isle felt like another punch in the gut. Again that sounds dumb considereing how little you actually knew each other but you didnt care. 

-Harry and you talked before he left. He gave you one of his rings "so you wont forget me darling". So you give him one of yours "then dont you forget me either". *cue more crying and hugs, between all of you *

-Mal announcing that the barrier will be taken down during the engagement party was the best thing that couldve happened to you at that point.

"Looks like you get a chance with your pretty boy after all." Evie.

Uma to harry on the isle: "Now you can get your pretty girl, pretty boy." While bumbing his shoulder.

As soon as you could spot eachother on the bridge you ran into each others arms.

-Kith

-like a lot of em

-Your friends from both sides were incredibly happy for both of you.

[enwrites]

Cloud Nine (p.sh) — pt. 2

pairings: brother's bff!sunghoon x afab!reader

warning: 18+ MDNI !! (not proofread at all im so sorry)

genre/cw: smut, somewhat angst, emotional tension, unresolved feelings, pining, sunghoon is dumb and emo, crying, arguing, unprotected sex (wrap b4 u tap pls), riding, slight fingering, slight usage of pet names, breeding, body worship kinda?, jay is still very much your brother here and is overprotective of you, heeseung cameo + mention of jake, fluff if you squint i think (lmk if anything was missed!)

synopsis: after what happened the previous week, tensions are high. sunghoon is left to his own feelings and thoughts as he tries to overcome the mess he made. will he be able to mend things and fix the trouble he caused?

wc: 5.7k words

a/n: here is the long awaited pt two which now concludes cloud nine, everyone cheer!! i've been meaning to post this earlier but got side tracked lol but also tumblr deleted this and i had to redo the layout. tysm for all your kind words and feedback so far on my blog! it means so much to me. i wasnt too happy about this in the end but i felt i needed to finish what i started, ty for bearing with me <3 and again hope u all enjoy~

[ masterlist ] [ part one ]

A week has passed since the incident took place. 

Days grow long, painful almost as lingering feelings grow stronger and stronger. Sunghoon just couldn’t bring himself to come face to face with you any more. Hell, he couldn’t even face your brother either, his body trembles a bit, remembering what came after. 

Both of your faces drop realizing Jay had been awake the entire time. Sunghoon looks at you as he starts to panic, gathering his clothes back on at the speed of light. You follow him, putting yours on as well. This was not going to be good. The both of you trying to hurry down the stairs to get Sunghoon out, Jay beat you guys to it. The look of anger plastered all over his face, arms crossed as he stood up hastily from the couch, his eyes on the both of you. 

If looks could kill, you both would be dead, lying lifeless on the ground. 

Sunghoon shutters as he comes face to face with his best friend as he hangs his head low. You tremble as well, your brother has always been scary to you. His stare was so cold, you felt like your living room had turned into Antarctica. You scurried down, making your way slightly in between the two boys. “Look, Jay, it’s not what it—,” he cuts you off.

“Not what it looks like? You two were just fucking?! How could you two do this to me? How could YOU do this to me? That’s my fucking sister?” He finishes off as he jabs his finger into Sunghoon’s chest, anger and disappointment running through his veins. Sunghoon lets out an exhausted sigh, running his hands through his hair. Anxiety coursing through his entire body, he felt like he needed to run away and hide. 

“Jay, please just liste—,” Sunghoon shakily speaks up only to be cut off. He knew this wasn’t going to end well. The two of you both knew that once Jay got angry, there was no stopping him.

“What the fuck is there to listen to? I've heard enough, you had ONE rule, anyone else but my sister!” Jay shouts at Sunghoon’s face, the younger boy hangs his head low again. He didn’t know what to say. Small cries were heard as he turned his head to the side, heart breaking as he saw tears running down your face. He wanted to reach for you right there, to hold you. To tell you he was going to fix this. But he couldn’t. 

Too overwhelmed by everything that was happening, you just stood there, silently crying as the two boys looked at one another. No one dared to utter a word. The silence was heavy and suffocating within the room. All you could think about was how glad you were that your parents weren’t here for any of this. 

“Jay… please just—,” Sunghoon tried to speak up once more, Jay was pushed to the edge. “Just get the fuck out of the house, I can’t even fucking look at you right now… you’re lucky I don’t just kill you right now,” Jay spits at him one last time. Sunghoon had no choice but to leave. He takes one more look at you, his entire world shattering. You look back at him with tear stained eyes, wanting to stop him. But you couldn’t. No one would do anything. The boy hung his head low as he made his way out of your house. Getting into his car, that was when it all came out.

The tears he was holding back poured out of his eyes as he tried to compose himself to drive off. Did he really just lose the two people he loved all in a single night?

Now Sunghoon was contemplating whether or not he wanted to finally make his way to classes, ditching every single day since then. The days grow long and cold, especially not having his best friend there, or anyone there for that matter. Who was he supposed to talk to about all of this? He had been ignoring your messages since that night, not really knowing how to face what just happened.

He wanted to speak to Jay and explain his feelings. But how the hell do you tell your best friend that you’ve been secretly in love with his sister this entire time. He just couldn’t. He always knew Jay would kill him, having given him the “don’t you dare go after my sister” speech the first day they met. Jay has given all of his friends that speech. Sunghoon knew better and he especially knew what he was doing that night was risky. 

Guilt washed over him like a wave onto the shore, crashing onto everything into its way. Even if he were to try and mend things, he can’t lie and say he hasn’t been the greatest to you either. Sunghoon didn’t mean to ignore you, he really didn’t. He tried to push his feelings aside, he wanted things to go back to normal. He knew he was hurting you as he ignored your texts and calls to him. Maybe he wasn’t good for you after all. He didn’t want to hurt you and he didn’t want to hurt Jay as well. Sunghoon groaned into his pillow as frustration and sadness filled his body. Wallowing in his sadness, he was taken back to reality as a persistent knock was banged onto his dorm room door. His heart fell to his ass. 

What if it were Jay? What if it were you? Surely you wouldn’t want anything to do with him after being ignored for a week now. He hesitantly gets up, making his way to the entrance. Impatient, the person behind the door pounds onto the frame once more. Sunghoon gulps, palms getting clammy thinking who it could be. Before he can pull it open, a voice loudly speaks up. 

“Dude I know you’re awake, just open the damn door already!” Yelled the person behind the door. He lets out a sigh of relief. Opening the door, Heeseung makes his way in. Pushing past the shorter boy, he makes his way to the desk and sits on the computer chair. Letting out a deep sigh, he scrunches his nose as he takes in the dorm room. Sunghoon takes notice of his distasteful expression, head hung low as he realizes how bad his room really did look. 

“God… you look rough, when was the last time you even showered?” Heeseung spits, shaking his head in disappointment. This was the worst he has ever seen the boy. All of his years of knowing Sunghoon, not once has anything affected him in this way. Not even Sunghoon’s very first girlfriend had this effect on him. Heeseung was fed up with seeing his two closest friends feud, so he needed to make a change. Heeseung had always known how much Sunghoon really liked you anyways. 

Everyone knew how much the two of you secretly liked one another. 

Heeseung wasn’t stupid and he knew Jay wasn’t either. Jay was just stubborn and has always been that way. Of course, who’d want their best friend to fuck their little sister? But Heeseung knew there was no changing Sunghoon’s feelings for you as well as yours for him. Anyone could see it from a mile away, even tens, thousands even. 

Sunghoon keeps his head low, not being able to make eye contact with the older boy either. “I don’t know… maybe like yesterday…,” Sunghoon muttered. He definitely didn’t shower yesterday.

“Yesterday my ass, this place is a mess dude… keep this up and Y/n is definitely not gonna want your stinky ass, figuratively and literally, yuck…,” Heeseung says in disgust as he eyes the empty ramen cups and cans all over the boy’s desk, reaching to his floor. “Plus Mrs. Kim has been on my ass to get you to come back to class… you realize attendance is important right?” The older boy finishes almost as if he was lecturing Sunghoon. Sunghoon throws his head back, a groan erupting once more from him. 

“Yes I know dad… and Y/n doesn’t want me anyways, she probably hates me right now,” Sunghoon grumbles as he sighs, sadness lacing his tone. Heeseung rubs the temple of his, exhausted at how far this has come. 

“You really are fucking stupid,” Heeseung chuckles. Sunghoon, now annoyed, sits up to look at the other. “Look if you just came here to give me shit you can leave!” Sunghoon loudly said to him. Heeseung puts his hands up, surrendering.

“I’m just here to help bud—,” Sunghoon cuts him off. “Help my ass? How exactly are you helping?” Sunghoon bites back, anger brewing within him.

“Maybe if you haven’t been hiding for a week, you’d know how badly Y/n and Jay are fighting, better yet you’d know how badly she needs you right now. Yeah, Jay isn’t so happy, who would be? You literally fucked his— WHAT THE FUCK?” a pillow was thrown to his face before he could finish. 

“Before I was rudely interrupted, both of them miss you… no matter how much Jay hates to admit it, he misses you. He’ll get over it eventually, everyone knew you two had the hots for each other anyways,” Heeseung rolls his eyes as he finishes. Sunghoon cocks an eyebrow, confused at the last statement.

“What do you mean everyone knew…,” Sunghoon quietly asks the older boy. Heeseung sighs again as he face palms himself, clearly Sunghoon was not the smartest guy alive. 

“Dude… we’ve all known since high school… you aren’t very slick … we see your eyes traveling… we see the way you look at her and stuff, Jay isn’t stupid. He just hates to admit that you actually like his sister, I mean who could blame you, she’s smokin—OW!” Sunghoon throws a water bottle to Heeseung’s head, not wanting to hear the last part. But Heeseung was right. He had been in love with you for as long as he could remember. Bittersweet feelings fill his chest as he remembers the first day he met you. 

He remembered the day Jay had introduced you to him as the three of you decided to walk home from school together that day. To say he was in awe was an understatement. Remembering your cute smile, your sweet tone, and the way you giggled at his jokes. Ever since then, he had always teased you any chance he’d get. His small jokes turning into rather more annoying pranks, he loved just getting a reaction from you. The more you grew annoyed by his presence, he took notice as it made him secretly upset. But you never once pushed him away, you always made sure to still make him snacks if you were making anything, you always packed an extra lunch in case he wanted some. Sunghoon felt your lingering touches, no matter how “mad” you seemed to get at him.

But of course, your older brother held the two of you back. He knew it was wrong for him to go after his best friend’s sister of all people, so he tried his best to suppress his feelings. He made it a point to mess with you whenever he could. It was the only time you’d look at him, acknowledge him even. So he hid his feelings for you, but not well enough apparently. 

“Helloooo, earth to Sunghoon? Are you coming to class today or what?” Heeseung snaps at Sunghoon, bringing him back to life. Sunghoon blinks a couple of times before getting up. He needed to speak with Jay. He needed to see you again. Puzzled, Heeseung looks at him with furrowed brows. 

“Yeah… let’s go,” Sunghoon utters as he gathers his things to get ready to leave. Heeseung stands up, sucking in his teeth and stopping the boy in his tracks. A confused expression washes over Sunghoon’s face.

“Uhh… yeah before we go… I’m gonna need you to shower and brush your teeth… and I’ll help freshen up this room for you in the meantime— I got a feeling you’re gonna need it,” he pushes the boy into the direction of his bathroom, before getting ready to clean the dirty room for his friend. Sunghoon chuckles, as a smile creeps onto his face. He knew he could always count on Heeseung.

Sunghoon lets out a deep sigh as Heeseung’s car pulls into the campus parking lot. His heart felt like it was going to explode. What if he wasn’t ready?

“I’m not ready,” he softly speaks up, catching the attention of the other boy. Heeseung sighs again as he turns his car off, looking towards the younger boy. 

“Look, Hoon, you know I love you— no homo, but I hate seeing you like this and I hate seeing Jay like this. You two need to fix whatever this is, okay? I’m here for the both of you no matter what and that’s not going to change,” he looks at Sunghoon to reassure him that he was in fact being serious before continuing on. Truly, it broke his heart to see one of his best friends in this state of sadness. 

“And I know how much Y/n means to you, trust me when I say you two are perfect for one other. Jay isn’t heartless you know, the two of you mean a lot to him and I know he’d want you guys to be happy if it meant he had to share you with his sister— man this sounds so fruity but you know what I mean!” Heeseung gives Sunghoon a playful punch as the two of them laugh it off. Sunghoon takes a deep breath in and exhales out. He couldn’t go any longer without seeing you. With that, the two boys make their way out of the car and towards the campus. 

Stares fall upon the two as rumors clearly spread like wildfire. These were the consequences they paid for going to a smaller campus. Sunghoon looks to the floor, watching his feet as he makes his way to his first class. Maybe everyone did know. 

Plus he didn’t look the greatest at the moment either. Noticeable eye bags lay plastered on his face, hair a bit disheveled as he sported just a baggy hoodie and some sweats his first day back. He looked rough. 

He and Heeseung finally get to their first class and take their respective seats at the table they frequented. Sunghoon knew Jay had this class as well, anxiety eating away at him as his heart rate increases, he felt like he was going to hurl all the ramen he ate last night. He crosses his arm as he slams his head onto the table, too afraid to face his best friend. 

“Dude, it’s gonna be okay, it’s just Jay,” Heeseung says nonchalantly. Yeah it was just Jay, it’s not like he hasn’t seen Jay beat guys up for breaking your heart or anything. It’s not like he hasn’t seen Jay almost kill a guy for laying his hands onto you unprompted. He knew how much you meant to Jay and he was afraid Jay wouldn’t understand how he felt. And what he heard that night definitely didn’t seem like Sunghoon liked you as much as he did. For all he could’ve known, it might’ve seemed like Sunghoon was using you. 

Sunghoon raises his head from the table as he looks up, catching eyes with Jay as he makes his way through the door. Jay wore an uninterested expression on his face, Sunghoon not being able to read how he felt. He trembles a bit under his stare, as Jay takes a seat across from him, next to Heeseung. Without a word being spoken, the professor makes her way in, delighted to finally see Sunghoon back and well. 

“Ahh, Sunghoon, it’s nice to see you joining us again, alright now let’s get back to where we ended off yesterday,” she says to the whole class as everyone fishes out their books. Jay seemed almost too calm for Sunghoon’s liking. Sunghoon decides to wait until the class ends to speak to the other boy. To say he was nervous was surely an understatement. 

~

With the blink of an eye, class was over. Sunghoon nervously looks over to Jay as he sees the boy packing up his things to get out. Jay gets up, not even acknowledging the nervous boy as he makes his way out of the door. Sunghoon hurriedly gathers his things as he runs after him. You’d think he was actually in love with Jay or something. He manages to catch up to him as they both make their way out of the back exit. 

“Jay, dude wait— hold up please!” Sunghoon shouts, panting as he lets out a breath. Jay stops in his tracks as he turns to look at Sunghoon, taking in his noticeably rough appearance. Jay sighs, gripping the strap of his backpack. Sunghoon wore a pitiful expression, not knowing what to say. 

“Look Jay, I know what I did was really fucked… I know you’ll never forgive me… but I really, really—,” Jay stops the boy in his tracks, cutting him off.

“I know you like her, I’ve known for a while actually,” Jay deadpans. Sighing once more, he continues on as Sunghoon’s expression puzzles. “I’m not stupid, I see the way you look at her, c’mon dude, I just didn’t think you two would be like that while I was in the house… I don't wanna hear my sister like that! You could’ve at least taken her to your dorm or something…,” Jay trails, cringing at what he was put through last weekend. “Plus you could’ve literally just told me,” Jay rolled his eyes, shaking his head at the distraught boy. 

A confused expression overcomes Sunghoon’s face. “How was I supposed to tell you?! You said you’d kill me!” Jay groans loudly, face palming as annoyance grows within him. 

“I say that to everyone, but you’re literally my best friend, who else would I trust more,” Jay states as if it was obvious information. 

“So… are we cool?” Sunghoon asks softly. Jay rolls his eyes once more before a slight smile appears onto his face. It was really pathetic seeing his best friend this way.

“We’re about to not be if you keep her waiting for you and if you hurt her, I will seriously kill you,” Jay sternly says as he gives Sunghoon’s arm a little punch. “Seriously dude you should not be wasting your time with me, Y/n has been crying all week over you, you should really fix—,” Sunghoon cuts him off before hearing the last part.

“Oh my god— Y/n,” Sunghoon loudly says as he pushes Jay aside, running to find you. Jay shakes his head. All he could only do was hope you two would be okay. Your mother once said, to never get in the way of love. As much as he wished his best friend didn’t fall for you, he always knew the two of you liked each other. He just hoped in the future, he would never fall victim to your disgusting acts.

Sunghoon ran around the campus, asking anyone and everyone if they had seen you. Panic courses through his veins as he starts to think maybe you didn’t want to see him. Pushing his thoughts aside, he told himself he’d deal with the consequences later. He just needed to see you again. His head snaps as he hears an all too familiar laugh. There he sees you sitting at an outside table with a few of your friends. He hastily makes his way to you, catching the attention of those at your table. 

“Is that Sunghoon?” Your friend asks, catching your attention. Your heart starts to race. You turn your head around, catching his eye as he stands in front of you, hands on his knees as he tries to catch his breath.

“Sunghoon? What are you doin—,” without giving you a chance to speak, he grabs your wrist, ushering you to get up. “Let’s talk somewhere else, get your stuff,” he pants out, tugging you a little. Confused and almost excited to see he was alive and well, you gather your things as you mumble “sorry” to your friends, only to get devious smirks in return. After gathering your things, Sunghoon takes your bag as he starts to pull the two of you away, heading towards the dorms. Luckily, the buildings weren’t too far. 

“Sunghoon— Sunghoon! Wait, where are you taking me… why haven’t you been speaking to me?” You let out, as the taller boy continues to still drag you away and off campus. Sunghoon not listening, too deep into his mission to get you two to his dorm room, you let out a frustrated sigh. “Where are we going?” You ask once more as you are now being dragged down a hill. 

“Dorm,” Sunghoon nonchalantly replies back, your face heats up a bit, you’ve never been to his dorm before. Before you knew it, you were in front of a large building, not too far from campus. Sunghoon pushed past the doors, leading the two of you up the stairs of the building, too impatient to wait for the elevators. Students around you, staring at the two of you concerningly, watching a stern Sunghoon drag you around. You give them a sheepish smile, hoping to reassure them that you were okay.

Now on the second floor, the two of you make it down a hall. Sunghoon stops the two of you in your tracks, fishing his keys out. You stood in front of a door with a big ‘202’ on it. The nerves start to get to Sunghoon as he now realizes the situation in its entirety. He wasn’t really sure what he was going to say to you. Will you hate him? Do you hate him? He shook his thoughts away, hurriedly opening his door, letting you in first. You awkwardly step in as he closes the door behind you. Taking in the room before you, the scent of his cologne fills your nose. You walk your way to his bed, taking a seat as you watch him pick up a few lingering articles of clothing on his floor, throwing it into a basket. 

“Ahem,” you cleared your throat, gaining his attention. Making sure to move your bag to his desk chair, he walks towards you, taking a seat on the bed as well. You shift a little, making some room. To you it seemed like nothing, to him he feared the shifting meant you hated him. Did you even wanna be around him right now?

“Hoon what’s this all abou—,” before letting you finish, he cuts you off pulling you into a kiss. Taken aback, your eyes widened, softening against his touch as you gave into him. He deepened the kiss, reaching up as he laced his fingers through your hair, taking all of you in. Oh how he has missed you dearly. You pull away as tears form in your eyes, looking down onto your lap you fiddle your fingers. He reaches for your hand, taking it into his. The tears, now falling onto your lap as you couldn’t look him in the eyes, confused as to why he suddenly decided to acknowledge you again. 

“H-Hoonie… why did you leave me hanging?” You shakily asked, reaching your free hand up to wipe your tears away. His heart breaks as he watches you. Quite frankly, he didn’t know why he ignored you either. He reaches both of his hands up, taking your face into his palms, wiping your tears away with his thumbs. You secretly admit that after all the whole situation was somewhat silly but you couldn’t help but still be hurt as you felt like he didn’t reciprocate feelings back. Sunghoon takes in a shaky deep breath, tucking your hair behind your ears for you. 

“Y/n you know I’m stupid— right?” He softly asks you. You nod your head in response. Sunghoon reaches his hands back down to yours again, taking them in. “I’m so stupid, the stupidest guy ever, I wasn’t really sure what to do after that. I was afraid and feeling too many things all at once I guess I was just scared.” He lets out as a sigh left his mouth as well. 

“I know that’s not an excuse and I know this may sound crazy but I really like you Y/n…,” he trails as he looks at your face trying to get a hint as to what you were thinking. He hangs his head low as he was afraid of hearing your response. He gives your hands a little squeeze, bringing you back to life. 

Did he just say he liked you? A slight blush creeps up your face as you sniffle, wiping what was left of your tears away. His heart pounds rapidly, he felt like he was going to throw up whatever leftover instant ramen he had in his stomach. “Please Y/n… say something… anything…,” he whispers. You look up to him as you lay your head onto his shoulder. 

“I like you too Sunghoon,” you let out. His heart felt like it was going to explode. He needed some sort of reassurance. He wasn’t hallucinating now— was he?

“No Y/n, I really like you,” he says against your head. Now it was your turn to feel like your heart was exploding. Butterflies fill your stomach. “You really are so stupid,” you giggle as you lift your head up, looking him in his eyes. Before letting him speak, you pull him into a kiss. His hands instantly reach for your waist, holding you as you lean into him. He lets go of the kiss, putting his forehead against yours. “Y/n I’m really sorry, I know you’re probably still upset with me but—,” you cut him off as you pull his lips into a kiss once more. The two of you kick your shoes off, scooting your way further into his bed. Sunghoon’s back hits the headboard of his bed, you deepen the kiss straddling him as his hands linger down your waist and to your ass. 

“Off… please,” you mumble into the kiss, tugging at his hoodie. Taking the hint, he takes off his hoodie and shirt in one go, leaving him in just his sweats. You bite your lip as you take him in. The sight of him shirtless drove you insane. Sunghoon smirks as you stare at him, mouth agape. 

“Like what you see?” He winks at you. You roll your eyes as you sit on his lap, a moan leaves your mouth as you feel his noticeable bulge. He bucks his hips up into you, gripping your waist as you grind down on him. Small whimpers fall from your mouth. Sunghoon grows harder and harder as the sight of you dry humping him got him excited. He gropes your ass, leaving a slight smack on your cheeks. You let out a yelp, surprised at the sudden sensation. He reaches up to unbutton your shirt, needing to see you. You take this moment to free yourself from your clothes, shimmying out of your skirt, leaving you in just your lingerie. Sunghoon does the same, taking his sweats off. He looks back up to you, still leaning against his headboard. 

“Fuck Y/n, how many of these little outfits do you have?” He says as he caresses your body, feeling you with his hands. Here you are, clad in a little red lingerie set, sitting on top of him. All for him. He hungrily pulls you down into a sloppy makeout session, your arms reach behind his neck, pulling him in closer as you grind onto his bulge. He swears he could just cum all over you like this. He pulls back, trailing kisses down your chest, reaching behind your back, undoing your bra.

“As much as I like these on you, I prefer them much better off,” he says, laying kisses onto your breasts as he looks up to make eye contact with you. The shyness of the situation kicking in, your face heats up. You reach up to cover your face as he pulls your arms back down. He kisses all over you as a hand reaches for your boob. He gropes your boob, pinching your nipple between his fingers. He latched his mouth onto your other, sucking your tit like his life depended on it. You let out a loud moan, trying your best to not cause a noise disturbance. He pulls back with a pop, reaching his hand down to your pussy. To his surprise you were already soaked, the same way you were a week ago. 

“God, you are so pretty Y/n, you’re mine… all mine… fuck how did I get so lucky?” He says looking into your eyes as his fingers now circle your clit. Your body felt like it was on fire. You needed him badly and you needed him now. 

“All yours Hoonie— no one else’s,” you let out as you hump into his fingers a little. Your hands trail down to his boxers as you tug onto them, needing to feel him inside you again. He motions for you to get off. He takes this moment to take his boxers off as you take your panties off. He lays down onto his bed, putting his arms behind his head. Now fully naked, you reach down, legs still over him, you grab his painfully hard cock, giving it a slight stroke. He groans, bucking his hip into your hands. 

“Fuck baby, how about you show me you can ride, you’re awfully good at it don’t you think?” He says, giving you a devilish smirk. You squeeze his cock, giving him a slight eye roll. The thought of you riding your pillow fills his head. The memories forever now etched into his brain as a keepsake. He needed to experience that for himself. Not being able to handle the heat, you hover over his cock, rubbing his tip against your slick folds, earning whimpers from the both of you. 

“You’re so fucking wet, have you been waiting for this?” He groans out as you rub your wetness all over him. You eagerly nodded back at him, mumbling a little “yes” in response. You slowly sink yourself onto him. Sucking in your breath, you didn’t remember him being this huge. Sunghoon throws his head back as he feels your tight cunt, sucking him in and swallowing him whole. You finally get all of him in, sitting down on him. Your pussy felt so full as you pulsate, squeezing around his cock. He bucks his hip into you, needing you to move. 

“You feel so much bigger than last time,” you let out, slowly moving your hip up his shaft. Moving back down, he whines out your name. Your heart skips a beat. You move your hips up and down, increasing your pace. You lay your hands on his chest, riding him as you let out moans of his name. Sunghoon knew he needed to fill you up again. He puts his hands on your waist, gripping your sides as he helps you bounce on him. Watching your tits bounce, he was awestruck. 

“You look so hot Y/n, taking my cock so well baby, such a good girl for me,” he pants out. You whine as you let the pleasure overcome your body, you feel your first climax approaching. Sunghoon bucks into you, your cunt squeezing around his cock. 

“Hoonie~ I-I’m gonna c-cum!” You shout loudly. He fucks into you harder, holding you up as he repeatedly hit your g spot over and over again. 

“Fuck baby, you’re so fucking tight, cum for me,” he groans out as your pussy tightens even harder. He has never felt anything like it before. With one more pump, you let go all over him, screaming his name. Before you could even come back down, he flips the two of you over, pounding into your pussy. He takes one of your legs and throws it over his shoulder, pumping deeper into you. Overstimulated, you start to tear up as he continues to stroke harder into your cunt. 

“Too much… please Hoonie… g’nna cum … again,” you cried out. He reaches down, taking your lips into his. He shoves his tongue in your mouth as you moan into his mouth. He was so close to reaching his own climax as well. He pulls back as a slight trail of spit forms between the two of you. 

“So close Y/n, cum for me again baby,” he coos into your ear as he fucks into you harder. You scream his name once more as your nails dig into his back. Holding him close, he pumps one last time, before he erupts into you, his cum filling you up as he groans out your name. He slowly pumps a bit more as he rides both of your highs out. He trailed kisses down your neck and looked up to you, pulling his cock out slowly. Sitting up, he watches his cum spill out of your hole, fingering it back in slightly like the very first time. This was never going to get old. You hold yourself up slightly with your elbows as you cock an eyebrow at him. A puzzling expression lay on his face. 

“What? No picture this time?” You chuckled, breaking out into a smile. He giggles at your question, leaning down to give you a peck on your lips. The two of you look into each other’s eyes, butterflies in both of your stomachs now. “I forgive you by the way,” you say, breaking the silence. Sunghoon gives you a toothy smile.

“Good, cause you’re all mine…,” he speaks softly, giving your forehead a kiss. You giggle, smiling at him endearingly. You knew your life was going to be extremely different now. But nothing mattered in the moment but you and him. 

“All yours Hoonie… all yours,” you pull him down, nuzzling into his neck, not caring about the mess the two of you just made all over his bed. Sunghoon picks up his phone, checking the time. His face turns pale. Confused, you took a peak, your face now losing color as well.

*Heeseung sent you a message!*

Heeseung: jfc we could hear the two of you all the way from Jake’s room 🤮

© enwrites // tumblr

[jazeswhbhaven]

Look ı knowwww this game is hentai but. Hear me out please. I cant do this anymore İT İS JUST TOO MUCH, look ı might fuck off if this game was pure hentai but there are good character designs and interesting personalities and dynamicsz so ı just cant piss of it is too catchy for me. BUT FOR SAKE OF GOD İT İS JUST TOO MUCH HORNY AND İT COULD BE MORE BAREABLE İF MC WASNT FUCKİNG SPİNELESS ı saw ur asmo selfie post and saw mcs saying keep fucking me is...very mc behaviour but it irrated me why? BECAUSE THİS BİTCH DOES THİS WİTH EVERY FUCKİNG PERSON dude you are way above keep fucking me okay? You are about to fuck every living thing on solar system please just have a red line. Ok i understand storys base concept was virgin and knowing nothing but in story wise THİS SHİT JUST KEEPS GOİNG WİTHOUT END AND MC İS SHOWİNG ME THAT THEY ARE NOTHİNG BUT A BRAİN MELTED SEX ADDİCT. İ swear im okay with sex but this game has soooo much potential and story but it is showing us end of the day this is a sex similator and nothing is changing end of the day there is no obvi relation or feelings towards mc besides few persons other than that it is always bonding with sex and horny and nothing more they are just 'living dildos' to mc mh yeah they show little bit of emotions here and there. But there is a reason why side stories and events are much more fun, because less horny and more characters acting like luving beings not everything revolves around long and white sprounting thing.

Nonetheless ı hope you say your opinion too i wann hear really. But long story short ı dont think sex is everything and relationships reveolvs around it. Sex is a helper and great thing in relationships not a hinderance or shameful thing, but ı cant help myself GET FUCKİNG SECOND HAND EMBARSSMENT when goddamn mc is on screen.

Hey anon, fair warning when it comes to asking my opinion so hopefully I convey myself properly... When it comes to MC and their behavior and mindset for this game, which it's very clear now that their personality is "i'm more horny in theory but when it comes time to utilize that i crash and burn and act like i've never seen dick in my life" and that's what makes me roll my eyes because it's like you're in Hell...you can be as unhinged as you wish please just do that cause everyone keeps saying so.

Now when it comes to the sex content in the game and the way it was advertised, I came in with the expectation that this would be pretty much sex, more sex, and basically more sex. I came here for demon pixel dick and whelp that's what I got. I personally would have liked more of a variety. Maybe devils that are submissive, switches, bratty tops, finally got a pillow prince with Belphie. just missing a damn threesome or something the five kings card was...anyway

But that's just me.

I tend to not bring IRL things (like me not even putting sex on the hierarchy of needs) to media I enjoy unless it's for joking purposes and me being unserious.

NOW I'm not saying plot/slice of life/wholesome content is boring, I pretty much enjoy that breath of fresh air when reading lore, seeing how the devils interact on a day to day basis with one another. At this point since it's been a year I want m o r e of that.

But at the end of the day...they're demons...beings not really meant to be wholesome or human like or behave like us at all. Any wholesome content is a plus, but I'm here once again to scratch an itch.

TLDR: I came to fuck demons. MC isn't fucking them how I would...which is a disappointment, but that's what I'm here for. Lore/Slice of Life content is nice tho and I do enjoy it.

[moose-muffin]

im new here (hiya from the hazbin tag lol) but if you do character + character requests than please PLEASE gimmie a lee!vox with ler!alastor 🙏🙏🙏hear me out... the two are fighting and al (sHocKINglY) wins out, and vox expects to like.. be beaten into the ground as a result, but nope!! he gets tickled!!! to tears!!!! smthn smthn he wasnt smilin and, yk, youre never fully dressed w/o a smile!!!

/nf to do tho ty for reading!!! <3<3

OMG OMG HELLO WELCOME I HOPE YOURE DOING GOOD YIPPEE

SO FUN FACT I WAS VERY LIKE NEUTRAL TO RADIOSTATIC BUT TONIGHT HAS BEEN (HAHAH GET IT) AN ADVENTURE AND THIS ROAD HAS BEEN SUCH A BLAST <3 THOSE TWO FUCKERS ARE SO INSTIGATIVE ITS CRAZY.

I KNOWWWW THIS AS A FIC WOULD GO C R A Z Y!!!!! IDK IF ANYONE HERE WRITE FOR VOX AND ALASTOR AND PERHAPS DOES COMMISSIONS BUT I WILL PAY!!!! PLEASE HIT ME UP OR ILL PROBABLY GO TAKE A PEAK FOR MYSELF TMR <3 AS LONG AS THATS OK ANON. (I WILL ABSOLUTELY LET IT BE POSTED AS LONG AS THE AUTHOR IS OK WITH IT WHICH USUALLY THEY ARE!!!!) IM GONNA TAKE SOME CREATIVE LIBERTIES AS I TYPICALLY DO HEADCANONS!

IM NOT USUALLY A CHARACTER + CHARACTER GIRLY SO BEAR WITH ME BUT I WILL DO MY VERY BEST!!!! HOPEFULLY I CAN DO THIS JUSTICE! IT WILL BE RANDOM HCS THAT ARE UNRELATED TOO. MY BRAIN IS A MESSY PLACE HWBSHWDBD

OK SO LIKE I KINDA MENTIONED, THEY BOTH LOOOOVE TO JUST GET UNDER PEOPLES SKIN. LOVE IT!!! ESPECIALLY ALASTOR. HES SUCH AN ASS (affectionate)

I’D EVEN SAY HE’S KIND OF AN INSTIGATIVE LER???? BRO IS DOING EVERYTHING IN HIS POWER TO GET TO TICKLE VOX LIKEEE IDK IF THAT EVEN MAKES SENSE BUT I KNOW ITS TRUE. HE WILL CASUALLY WIGGLE HIS FINGERS IN CONVERSATION, TWEAK HIS RIBS FROM BEHIND, LITTLE THINGS LIKE THAT. WELL THEYRE NOT LITTLE. ESPECIALLY NOT TO VOX WHO IS SO FLUSTERED BY IT… ITS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING

BUT! VOX HAS STARTED TO FIGURE IT OUT. AS HE IS ALSO ONE WHO LOVEEES TO GET UNDER SKIN, HE DECIDES HE’LL DO EVERYTHING TO TRIGGER A LER MOOD IN ALASTOR. IF HE CAN TELL HE ALREADY HAS ONE, HE FINDS WAYS TO SUBTLY (WE ALL KNOW HE ISNT SUBTLE THOUGH) LEAVE A SPOT UNPROTECTED. BUT ALASTOR DOESNT WANT TO GIVE HIM THE SATISFACTION!!! HE TRIES SO HARD TO NOT GIVE IN TO VOX BC HE “WANTED TO BE THE ONE IN CONTROL” AND NOW HE ISNT AND HES #PISSED

ALSO VOX ABSOLUTELY IS HORRIFIED OF VULNERABILITY. YET HE IS ABLE TO MOVE PAST IT WITH ALASTOR HERE. SOMEHOW HE ISNT AS WORRIED ANYMORE. MAYBE HE KNOWS ALASTOR WILL REACT. HE LOVES THAT SO VERY MUCH.

AS FOR THE SPECIFIC PROMPT, OH THAT IS SO REAL!!!! ABSOLUTELY YES!!!

I DONT WRITE GOOD ROMANCE BUT LIKE UGH IMAGINE IT NOW. Alastor definitely just got himself to the V’s tower and was planning on fucking with Vox only to see he had already been kinda pissed off. Alastor wouldn’t be as satisfied if he knew he didn’t cause the frustration. He realized he could just stir the pot again. Problem solved, and what better way to solve it than using his weakness against him.. being tickled.

I’m being a little silly but genuinely Vox is so ticklish. Like most ticklish person in hell would go to him if it were an official title. That’s what I’m thinking. That being said, Alastor also knows how quickly he could get him to crumble… but wouldn’t it be more fun to take it slow.

Vox notices his presence almost immediately. He tried to ignore it as he feels his face get warm. He can’t fuck this up. He takes a deep breath and turns around. “Why hello, Alastor! What brings you to our building this evening?” He said in a semi newcaster voice. He wasn’t ready to drop the act

“Well Vox, I came here for a reason of my own but then I walked by your office and you looked so sad!” He began to walk closer to Vox. “You know, t they say you’re never fully dressed without a smile!”

Vox let out a laugh that was quite clearly untruthful. “Yes Alastor I am aware! I was alone in here and so I figured I’d just save up some energy. I’m sure you understand.”

“Quite frankly I don’t,” Alastor paused, “I think maybe I could help you get that smile back.”

Vox didn’t even have to think. He knew Alastor meant he was going to tickle him. You could ask Velvette. She’s seen those two in tickle fights that lasted for DAYS. she knows what they’re capable of, or more so what Alastor is capable of.

Vox puts up a fight for maybe a couple seconds but he just loves tickles more than he can play pretend that he doesn’t <3

It works out well for them both, Alastor gets to fuck around with Vox and well, Vox gets his shit rocked!!! And he loves that more than a lot of things.

OK IM GONNA CUT IT OFF HERE BUT PLEASE FEEL FREE TO COME BACK!!!! IM ALWAYS DOWN TO HEAR WHAT PEOPLE ARE THINKING!! MAYBE ID DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS AGAIN OR LIKE ADD ONTO THIS!!! BUT I AM JUST ALL OVER THE PLACE CURRENTLY HEHE. I HOPE THESE ARE ENJOYABLE!!! (LOWKEY I WANNA ADD MORE TO THISSSS MAYBE TMR MAYBE TMR WE’LL SEE)

apologies if anything is ooc, i just do this for funsies <3

THANK YOU FOR THIS ASKK

[submariini]

Thee Antwerp Gig Overview (by #5)

me and @jeevm arrived around 7:50am at the gig, numbers 4 and 5 bc belgians simply are not a queuing people. not much happened beside chaotic uno and trix doing a short interview with us seven? i think at that point i forget

the bus arrived a little before ten am, and we were allowed to sit inside at that point so we just all went outside again and just stood there for a whole ass three hours being clowns.

jaakko, jukka and jesse walked by a few times entirely undisturbed bc belgians also do not talk ever. (and dutch ppl ig). respectful times.

eventually, at around one, Häärijä got off the bus (mostly as a distraction for K going the other way). This man came by like proper we thought he was gonna just walk by, but he waved and then decided to ignore everyone and beeline straight into my direction for a hug? hello? unsure how he still knows what i look like (was not in the yellow tshirt yet bc cold and he hasnt seen me since simerock).

K and Jesse came by as well -- please note at this point there were like goddamn 40 people there. Nothing like the Munich papal visit scenes at any point.

K just the nicest. Didn't remember me from simerock (fair, it was a factory of photographs) and was like wtf rollo (as per ushe), complimented my boots bc he likes them (they are r+ but usually kids sizes) and i got to be "mean" abt the r+ ticket sale and the bus making it stressful. When he asked it I wanted him to sign anything, I didn't have anything and he just offered to sign my boots? Man did not expect the clown to clown communication that was happening bc he seemed very oh god for real when I agreed.

Someone gave him a necklace and instantly wanted to put it on. The person who gave it couldn't fasten it bc nails/shaking hands so I offered to try and then idk how it got fastened bc christ I shook as well. Not helpful: Mikke both filming that and the boot signing up close 😭

Told Jesse he told me at simerock that I should just join the tour bus and he went "yeah that sounds like something I would say." then scolded me for not having been in Berlin for that 😭

H wandered back and forth a bit, had another weird football chat (rip hazards career) where I was sitting on a little wall, back to the bus still at that point, and he just leaned into me turning around and just held my shoulders the entire time? When I got sweaty and took my hoodie off later he also suddenly grabbed my tshirt when it was riding up I am Feeling Fine.

Was wearing the yellow tshirt w the cross stitch and he made me turn to show Jesse??? And Jesse did the nicest "wait can I touch this?" bc I guess he thought it would be fragile???

People formed a nice selfie line and K just said he's santa claus 🎅

H vanished, then came back out of the bus, and we had a weird mime moment bc I wasnt sure if he was motioning at me to get to him away from the rest. He was and I got fucking free merch??? Like free, not yet available merch. Genuinely what the FUCK. Im making an extra post abt this most likely bc I cannot explain what the hell happened in that moment and the things around it.

When Mikke did the interview w the first queuer, H just stood behind the glass door into the venue and started miming at us. Like not even properly in character? Help.

Gig

Jesus Belgian audiences proving once again we just Are like that. Refusing to goddamn shut up. Every time. Man disallowed to banter by loud belgian screaming. He seemed so touched though jesus christ time to cry

Got roasted for basically slut dropping and shooting my Häärijä sign up in the air before Mic Mac. "yes that mean fucking häärijä" local man fed up w my antics.

Got roasted AGAIN straight after Mic Mac because I was the person he pointed at during the "this is your home now" bit. (promptly decided diving behind the barrier and Face In Hands was the best reply)

Mild bit before the 2nd Cha Cha Cha as I was the front row person he called out for not sitting down. Just yelled that I got bad knees and I'm not sure anyone caught his reply properly 😂

Overall 10/10 excellent gig what the HELL. The belly flop on the balloon, the whole banter before paidaton bc so much of the queue ppl I was with took their shirt off, the way we refused to kept chanting, him trying to eat the bubbles, him talking about Hs dick and the whole balls convo??

Post Gig

Had to pick up merch for a few people, so went with the hope of a third Häärijä hug. He eventually got a bit held up outside of merch by people (lit at the door into the merch room) and I got to just "Sorry it's me again" but he just instantly hug. We talked a little about the gig (did I like it, how I was doing) and like K feeling much better/doing better ft. some dumb crap.

Merch was in fact gotten after I just LOST my friends bc of H.

CANNOT wait for London. and Glasgow but thats with normal people. Like met so many fun people in the queue who are going to be at London jesus christ. Party time.

[sanjidysphoria]

Hi agi I'm obsessed with your tags under that tmi post you're my idol please tell us more about bow you ruined this man's life

you know what. theres 30 mins left so i will. so the reason i got with him was is very confusing and it was obviously out of revenge.

back to elementary school when i had a best friend named uhhhhhh kate (not her actual name). so kate and me we were epic bffs because no one else liked us. however for very different reasons. see kate was genuinely just fuckign irritating while i was emo. i kinda actually hated her ass but since i had no other friends i was like sigh this will do. we went to different highschools and i had a friend in another class named dave. now those two through me got to know each other and they started dating. i dont know how cuz again this girl was fucking annoying but anyway. fast forward two years i basically dropped her ass since i got lowkey popular in highschool because i was openly gay and the highschool had a weird straight gay ratio, like i swear everyone was closeted. again fast forward to last summer they break up because dave couldnt take the long distance thing. and kate hits me up. like every day. and i HATE her ass okay she made me miserable through elementary and now for some reason she thinks she can just traumadump on me every day, and i dont mean like "im sad today :(((" she GENUINELY texted me shit like im killing myself today. i called her mom btw i was so sick of her. and she wouldnt leave me alone!!!!!!!!!!!! so i go hm. how can i make her not text me ever again. and she gave me a wonderful idea cuz one time she was bitching about how dave never even liked her he had a crush on me like whatever man i dont give a shit. im gay. but then... what if i wasnt. what if i stole her ex man and she came to hate me and blocked me everywhere. this is where my childhood best friend, andrew came into the equation. because see i was nt rlly friends with dave anymore but i knew they were best friends so if i used andrew i could get with dave! again im gay. im just fucking insane and evil. so we start hanging out and this one time me and dave get very close to hooking up but then he says aw man but ur gay. and in my mind im like yeag thats valid but how do i let him know that im not? so i tell andrew hey im bi thinking he would tell dave. he didnt though and one time we got very drunk and he was like can we make out and im like drunk so i go sure......... and then we started like being a thang lowkey but the funny thing is dave didnt back down like???????? and andrew was like super jealous the whole time and im pretty sure i ruined their bestfriendship whatever i kinda always thought they were in gay love idk. but then kate got the idea that me and dave were also a thing despite me being with the other guy and she actually did block me everywhere so the plan kinda worked idk lol thats the lore

[queatherine]

td spoilers episodes 9-13 (long post; more in depth thoughts towards the end)

ep 9:

the dudes being there for priya awwwww that was so sweet !!

hey julia, is that car cool enough :)

sighhhhh mkulia

julia is that tiktok lumberjack lesbian,, i think shes canadian too

ep 10:

listen, i think we could all agree that the moment damien found that immunity idol way back when sealed his fate that he was NOT going to be a finalist,, so i wasnt surprised, just saddened

julia manipulation truly is everything i love evil women

ep 11:

MACARTHUR??!?!??!??!? truly not the cameo i expected, but i did not mind it!!

can we stop this annoying distrust arc between priya and caleb?

cant believe they killed off raj

so like,, did dinosaurs just never go extinct in the total drama universe??? is this one of the insane lore bits like 9/11 never happening (or happening some time after 2009???) 9/11 was the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs

CANT BELIEVE THEY VOTED OFF RAJ NOOOOOO IM WAYNE FRRR

ep 12:

me 🤝 priya afraid of lighting + thunder

OLD MAN TENNIS YAOI????!?!?!?! PULLED THEM OUT OF THEIR GRAVES FOR THIS CAMEO WOW

can we stop this annoying distrust arc between priya and caleb? pt2

i dont ship juliayne (juliayne shippers i do not hate you please do your thing i love you), but goddamn i want more interactions between theyre sooooo silly

ep 13: listen, i think wayne winning is fine. do i love himbos? yes. was i rooting for him in the finale? yes. in the grand scheme of things, do i think he is a good finalist? no. we can all agree that hes very much an owen, and i dont mind that!! i actually think having a fan favorite, comic relief, underdog third party winning makes sense in this season, because i dont think caleb or julia winning would be a satisfying end (especially how they were handling them by the end)

caleb's story was messy, and at the end of the day (and i know that the intentions changed), he did start his alliance with priya to use her. him winning, after all of the drama, after priya was gone, wouldve just idk felt shitty. he did get the girl in the end, which concludes his story better than him winning it. (if im comparing this to the tdi 2007 final three,, i guess hes the gwen)

as for julia, she had two seasons to be villain, and it was amazing. she is so good at what she does and she is such a joy to watch. and we all know how total drama handles its villains, they need to get their comeuppance. did bowie double cross her last season? yes. and she came back still was the main villain and was AMAZING at it. but she was still the villain for another 13 episodes, AND HER GETTING PRIYA OUT LAST EPISODE, she cant win. was her just desserts satisfying? meh. nice callback to heather (we all know julia is the heather of this comparison), though i can understand people who dont like this callback and think its tiring or something. they couldve done something else, but im not mad (i kinda fuck with the mullet). i just see no satisfying way for julia to win with how she was presented in these seasons: she was not world tour heather, with three full length seasons and a greater threat to overcome; she was island heather, and therefore could not win.

overall thoughts of the season:

im someone that thinks the hockey bros jokes nearly always land, so i enjoy the shit out of them (i think im in the majority?)

im someone that did not like priyaleb at first, grew to being more neutral about it, but still found it to be a bit tiring. i like priya, i like caleb, i dont like tiring romantic subplots, and it sucks that that was the entire thing for these characters this season

the julia mk duo was AMAZING, one of the highlights of this season and one that i never wouldve expected to be real. mkulia wins in my heart and i hope they start their podcast (JULIA WAS GOIGN TO USE THE MONEY TO START THE PODCAST WITH MK HOLY SHIT GIRL IS IN LOVE)

it sucks that certain characters really got nothing this season (millie, nichelle, emma, and even axel to an extent).. but i get that characters like millie and emma already had a lot of screentime last time and someone has to be an early boot (just realize the ones i listed off were all women,, damn the writers fr just hate women)

at the end of the day, i really enjoyed this season. and i think the most important part of that enjoyment was this was the first time i got to watch a season and have no idea what was going to unfold. i watched the first four season of total drama when they were airing, but i was a little kid with poor comprehension skills. the first three seasons aired before i knew how to read (i learned to read late). and with tdpi, rr, and tdi 2023, i watched them after the fact and knew who the winners were going in. this was the first season i watched were i truly did not know the winner, and that added to my enjoyment. not to mention this being the one and only time i was present in an online space to talk about show as the episodes dropped. this season was a bit messy here and there, but it delivered some great stuff. i found myself laughing out loud and just having a good time, which is all i need out of my silly little cartoon

[orangepeelshortbreadcookies]

Hello!!! sorry i jum in here but i saw many post of your as a polin pen hater. You can hate what you want of course but its necessary to lie just to hate a character because of her body??? it wasnt that bad, she was not mean.

yes, what she did telling the ton marinas secret was not the best choise but it was what she thought it was the only way. Do you all wish for colin a marriage with not love?? and in a more practical way this is fiction and we all now he was going t end with pen , they are end game and thi is romance, its suppouse to be romantic that theu found each other, and for me it is. She didnt told marina secret because she wants colin for herself , she never thought she cold have him. maybe yo dont understand this but we, fat girls who are foung unattractive NEVER expect love or having a man, even less somone like colin. I think you, as many sadly, jugdge Pen actions too strong and deep down its all becuase of how she looks. Depp down i know you judge her action strongly becuase you can't accept that a woman who looks like that get something. I know you will keep hating, just want to say my opinion

(2) I saw you ask once why we ( pen fans) are mad when people hate her like you do if we got everything, saying like she happy and get married and LW. i will answer that from my perspective. Im fat, people is mean and that herats and yes, maybe it not a good things but it nice to have a revenge for all that suffering , but beside that i feel represented FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME in a romance show, ALL THE ROMANCE FEMALE LEADS AND THIN WOMAN and for the first times she looks like me but everyone is hating her becuase of how she looks and the worst is anyone accept its becuase of that, you all write long essays jugdging her actions but as i said, Were her actions that bad???? think about it fr......

Others please also refer to this post for more context.

I did not intend to answer this ask, because honestly, I'm really very lazy. Since there are only so many ways I can make my argument against the same accusation over and over again, especially to someone who clearly doesn't want to listen, I figured ignoring was the right decision. I'd rather spend my creative energy and efforts on my own writings, instead of figuring out another elaborate wording on how being critical of a character's actions does not equate fatphobia, and that personal adversity does not equal a 'get out of jail' free card for repeatedly inflicting pain on other people on a mass scale. I've talked about it in depth in my own blog, as well as reblogging other eloquent, well thought-out posts from others, Polin fans and anti-Polin fans alike. You can just scroll through my blog to see that. But I don't think you have come after me, time and again, to be convinced.

Even now, I still think ignoring you would have been the smarter, or at least, easier course of action for me. But I digress. Maybe it's one of those days where I feel more confrontational, maybe my ADHD is acting up and my meds are not hitting as well today, maybe after weeks of stress-filled personal achievements I'm feeling talkative seeing someone trying to disturb my peace. Nontheless, since you've made diligent efforts in seeking out my response, today's your lucky day, once and for all.

Something my mutuals and followers might have learned about me, is that I, being pretty fucking lazy, don't post/write a lot. To remedy this, when I do post, oftentimes I try to be as thorough as I possibly can. So, in the spirit of being thorough, here's a little log of the things I have received in the past weeks, on this site as well as on AO3, some of which, @cherryblossom970sblog, I have reasons to believe came from you

So you feel represented by character. Awesome. Good for you. You should celebrate it with like-minded people. You think nobody likes Penelope the way you do? Find the ones who do. I can assure you, they exist. I saw them daily on my dash. Read fics that bring you joy. Don't read the ones that don't. I have seen way too many Penelope/Anthony, Penelope/Benedict or even Penelope/Gregory fics, or fics where Penelope just straight up abused Colin that are celebrated in the comments. I don't like those and you know what I do? Scroll past those fics or click out of those and not read them. You know what I don't do? Go after the writers, try to police their writing, and accuse them of bigotry for not catering to my preferences.

Accept the fact that it's not going to be a 100% percent approval rating. And that's fine. That's part of life. I'm a primary Benophie fan, I've seen people wanting Benedict to end up with different people. It's their prerogative, I leave them alone. I have mutuals who have different takes on actions of Kate, Edwina, and Anthony, with varying degrees of feelings regarding how season 2 ends, and I have my own opinions. Personally, I find all three parties were wrong in that triangle, especially Anthony, and the sisterhood between Kate and Edwina in that season ought to have been handled with more respect and care. And my mutuals and I have civil, nuanced discussions about such things and ending those with still different opinions. That's okay. They're fictional characters and their actions are up to character analysis. It's fine.

What ISN'T fine is obssessively stalking inboxes of strangers, REAL people, unleashing insane level of hate and prejudices in defence of a FICTIONAL character, and accusing them of crimes they OBJECTIVELY did not commit, all because they don't share your opinions. I know you don't think this kind of behaviour is okay, you said so yourself that it's not a good thing. You've experienced fatphobia, you have my sympathies for that, but it doesn't give you the right to be shitty to other people. Your own bad experiences do not entitle you to disrespect, dismiss, invalidate and insult the people you harassed, including me, many of which are WoCs who have valid concerns regarding how their own experiences are represented and treated on the show. My struggles of being a bisexual, Asian, immigrant woman does not excuse me from being toxic to people who have done me no harm. I will not be vindicated in demeaning someone who have criticisms against the actions of fictional character who share my traits, criticisms that I just happen to disagree with.

And frankly, I find reducing the nuances of a character or person to only their bodies, to contribute (as either condemn or excuse) their actions to be only the result of their bodies, fucking insulting. It's infantalising and dehumanising.

Have a nice day and happy shipping. Leave us alone.

[kingcunny]

I'm anon. Please tell me more thoughts about jae and vis. Also is there any proof that it could have happened? I mean, there's a lot of proof that the more soild examples (gael, etc) could have happened, unintentionally or not on george's end. Just curious as to why you think vis is also a victim. Want to know your thoughts so badly lol

i dont think ive made one big post were ive talked about this, just something ive worked on here and there. so ive had to comb through my blog recollecting my thoughts lol. so sorry for the delay.

starting with proof first, cause there isnt. i dont think, i havent gone back and completely reread f&b yet. but there really isnt anything written about viserys childhood. we hear about when he was born, of course. but then the next time we really hear anything about him was he claimed balerion and married aemma, at 16. (and iirc, then hes not mentioned again until the great council, when he was 24. and even then daemon and rhaenys were more involved in that than him)

…or well my ‘proof’ is more in how viserys interacts with his brother, daughter, wives.

the way that viserys is so fixated on the love lives of both his brother and daughter. vis and daemon having messed around in some capacity when they were younger. viserys getting involved with both his wives when they were very young… it just felt to me like there was something more going on there. im really in love with ‘cog in the machine’ viserys. viserys doesnt Start anything, but he Does continue things. which means if hes sexually abusing his underage brother, wives, daughter… its because someone somewhere along the line did it to him first. taught him it was okay and/or viserys just desperately not wanting to admit something Bad happened to him. so he starts gaslighting himself, internalizing and normalizing what happened to him. hes a targaryen. this is just how targaryens do things. sometimes sex and love doesnt feel good and makes you cry and wish you were dead. thats normal! so viserys goes from victim to perpetrator. does what was done to him on anyone under *his* control. 

as for it being jaehaerys… alyssa wasnt one of ‘his’ daughters, as in she was ‘for’ baelon. but she does give jaehaerys his first grandson. i think that would matter to him, and viserys coming from the brosis couple that alysanne literally compared to them… (i also just remembered vis1 possibly being named after jaehaerys older brother who was tortured to death at 14.im not sure that helped) is where my idea that jae would sorta fixate on viserys came from. even before baelon became his heir. and i think it would piss him off that viserys was well. weak. he was soft, effeminate, ambitionless and showed no interest or skill in fighting. hell get treated how he acts. and after alyssa died… well alyssa wasnt ‘his’, but viserys is, in a way. he mightve lost one daughter but she left him a replacement

[v1trum]

Lots of tw's.. also please read the entire post if you start reading it. Im not a bad person. This is a specific case and i KNOW this person and have talked this stuff over w ppl that also know him. He manipulated me into hating the ppl i know i love most (as friends) now and did a lot of fucked up shit a lot of which I'll list

Tws include : sh, severe mental illness, "kys" jokes (wasnt rly a joke), ed, trauma, etcetc

Im only saying this shit on here because literally no one knows who im talking about and never will. This is an irl person who doesn't even have Tumblr im pretty sure.. I'd prefer if you only read this if ur a moot or i follow u or vice versa pls 😭

Im gonna throw the imaginary fights i have in my head on here

all the same person cus they side eye me at school and ik damn well he's trying to get ppl to not like me but idc cus im in the right and i have proof 💋

Like i just KNOW he views me as childish n shit

Likr

childish?? ME?? You're the one that said my 7 year old brother should kill himself because he played the same roblox game as you..a 14yo... But, yes, im the childish one...

its a genuine scenario I can't get out of my head and i need to talk abt it

Contrary to what you think, i DO like you. I don't hate you because my online best friend expressed how HE doesn't like you... Its actually crazy that you came into my home for a complete weekend, were as EXTREMELY disrespectful as you were, we didn't say anything and then you're out here saying me and my entire family hate you... Like no babes my parents went out and bought food from the store that we never eat bc you would eat it... No babes, i made cookies from scratch bc cookies are one of the only things you'll eat... No babes, we didn't even comment on the fact that you had three sodas and had two sips out of each of them before you wasted them...

Your "eating disorder" is DEFINITELY fake, too. There might be part of it in there but wdym "my grandparents starve me" when you asked if you could have a random bag of chips and they immediately bought it for you? I fear you just need to tell them when a food is out? They both work a ton bc they had to take you in a few months ago I don't think they notice much when the pantry or fridge is running low. Wdym "ew i hate that" to every food in existence but you scarf up wretched school breakfast and lunch daily...? Again with "i shove it down my throat bc my grandparents starve me" are you forgetting how close we got so quickly? How ik you? You wouldn't eat 95% of that before you starved to death if it was at my house... But you're gonna eat it all up there.

Same with your "personality disorder".... Wdym we're in the middle of English and you go "bro i just spawned in. What am i wearing and why? Omggg why do i have sh on my arms???" Like be so fr rn. You aren't immune to being aware of PHYSICAL PAIN. And i get like.. having a different style but fym "why am i wearing this what is it" ..? (I have talked to a SYSTEM friend abt this and they can confirm its v fake seeming)

Its actually crazy when i didn't kick you out after you said that about my brother, you're actually insane. I get you have very recent trauma but holy hell refrain from making relationships if you're gonna fuck someone up.

You had your "friend" give me back my sweater bc you were too childish to do it yourself and look me in the eye. You moved seats without permission. You glare at me in the class where you can't move seats.

Also, that "friend".. you call her a slut and talk shit abt her to her face because she has HEALED sh scars. Then you walk around campus with gaping wounds acting like you're self conscious of it when you're actually begging for attention. This is NOT me saying ppl who sh are attention seekers btw.. i KNOW him and me and several other people agree he's doing it for attention. My friends have said they'd have relapsed after seeing them if it had been a bad time for them, thats how bad it was.

I genuinely hope he gets better bc he is fucked up in the head, however i also wish the best on his next victim of "we're friends". I hope they get away or meet him after he has gotten better.

To this guy - i hope you better yourself instead of trying to make yourself as bad as possible because you find comfort in that, or rot.

[auricbound]

man, it's been a while since i posted here properly. it's been an enlightening past two days to say the least and it's all got me reflecting not only on my time here but also the future for this blog, my lore, etc. so...

have a pretty big dump under the cut. this'll be long, i feel like i have a lot to cover. i dunno who'll even read it, but i feel it's worth getting out there anyways.

so. yeah! been a while. been a LONG fucking while. im 21 now, turning 22 soon; almost 3 years have passed since i put this blog in its weird hiatus state. prior to that i was active a lot, writing a lot - i genuinely was extremely happy. in a way, i still am - but that only came after a very, VERY involved few years of consistent therapy appointments and learning to write for myself to somehow see my ideas through instead of pushing myself to be here.

so. should probably talk about that. i wont go into mega details because it's *done* and i don't want to bring a carcass to the surface, but i *do* want to give it a gravestone.

september and october of 2021 are the two months i can easily say are up there on some of the worst of my entire life. a lot of my own personal experience with my muse - with goldie - practically *died* during that span of time as a result of the things that happened. some of you might have an *idea* of things, and if so, please - don't bring it up, don't ask me or anyone else about it. i'm making this post for me, for my OWN catharsis. if people don't like that, *don't make it my problem.*

i don't fear people knowing, i just... i don't want to constantly have things be brought back and forth. im only just now realizing that what i went through *was not a singular experience*, and that it was a pattern of behavior that i wasn't *alone* in. for the longest time, i thought i was genuinely and completely alone in the fact that no one could really attest to what i went through except for one person who helped me through all of it alongside my own personal friendgroup separate from the rpc. turns out, i'm not, and that has been incredibly validating and actually has done a lot more for my confidence in the past 48 hours than i realized it could.

i hate the month of hell. i hate everything about it. i hate how it made me feel, how i couldnt do my internship without being constantly pressured to do something else for the sake of other people, how i was constantly made out to be someone who caused the problems and couldn't compromise or apologize when that really, really wasn't the whole truth. i've spent *years* in therapy just to affirm that i wasnt crazy and that it wasn't fair to treat me - a then 19 year old - as someone who couldn't make mistakes and was expected to just KNOW things and norms despite it being known that i *didnt* get things immediately. realizing i'm autistic has been a struggle that lasted *years* and if i'd known it then, it would have made me more receptive to how badly i was being treated instead of just sitting down and taking it and BLAMING myself for it. i hate that i was talked about to other people after the fact even though i explicitly kept my struggles out of talks with rpc friends.

i hate everything about what happened that year. and i hate that it ripped ed away from me for a good while and sent me into a horrible mental state that i took a really, REALLY long time to recover from - and even then, i'm still not 100%. i still have triggers that send me right back to that year. i still have things that remind me exactly of all the shit that happened. my health issues haven't gotten better since that month exacerbated them, but they haven't gotten worse - just a way of showcasing recovery, i guess.

2021, for better or for worse, broke me. it stole away my love for writing and my ability to do art for a while. i finally picked up the pieces and now they're melted back together, but there's nothing that'll change how badly it effected me and jeopardized one of my deepest mun-muse connections i'd ever had because i was accused of not being able to separate mun vs muse.

but i'm getting better. i'm being better. slowly but surely, i'm building my own personal safe space filled with people who will actually confront me for the things i do wrong *without* being afraid to even TALK to me. that wasn't easy, not by a longshot - but i'm happier like this. i'm thriving like this. because of the safe space i've built, i've been able to write *thousands* of words for fics for this very lore and all the things that came from it. i've been living my best life on my artblog, @aubodied , because i decided i was GOING to enjoy things without all of this bitterness being attached to it, because i'll probably *never* get accountability for what happened to me. i'm learning to live life without looking back on all of it.

it's been a wild ride. and now i don't feel like i have to isolate myself anymore now that i KNOW i'm not alone. so someday - i don't know if it will be soon or not, but SOMEDAY - i'll come back here. i'll start writing again with other people, actively. until then, i'm always open to be reached out to to talk or other things. i want to reconnect, and even though that'll be a long process, i WANT to restore the feeling of home i made for myself in this rpc.

so... hi. i'm evy. i also go by vee. i use he/they/she pronouns (strongly preferring he at the moment), and i'm proudly autistic and navigating the world with those lenses. i love videogames and i stream sometimes alongside doing personal art for my obsession with edling as a ship. i'd be happy to be your writing partner someday. i'd be happy just to make rpc friends again someday. 2021 was awful for me, but i've finally moved on without fear of being able to talk about this - now i want to thrive.

so thank you for listening to me, if you read this. i hope we can talk again soon. and remember - i'm always here if someone wants to reach out.

[terraliensvent]

guys i think civ isnt satan (edit: they lied)

EDIT: please see this post, civ played everyone like a fiddle and blatantly lied about having nothing to do with the pet species deletion. keeping this og post up to show how dedicated they were to painting their narrative

so, a few screenshots relating to their bulletin were given to me (you can see my initial thoughts here)

now as with all breaking news there are revisions to be made with new info

(all screens can be found in this imgur gallery, may be out of order because imgur is dummy stupid)

so it turns out, civ and coy actually werent contacted prior to the decision. i do agree this could have been handled differently and there should have been more of a discussion around it, HOWEVER im more inclined to the side of current terra staff. for one, they came to the decision of one adopt every two months for each staff member as compensation for their work on the team. their reasoning for cutting down coy and civ's amounts is to be fair to everyone especially considering coy and civ arent actively working on the species anymore. i dont necessarily agree with the decision to cut customs though, since people have to actively seek them out for that and its more akin to a comm service. i also want to note that i can understand why terra staff wouldnt want to negotiate about the number of adopts with civ and coy, considering that this is how it went last time

you can see in the imgur screens the original terms, notably that civ and coy collectively were allowed to make 12 adopts a month. i can see how it would be seen as unfair to not be able to be compensated as much as the people who left the place to die.

throughout the screens it seems civ is being a lot more reasonable, i think more discussion should have been had with them and after introspecting, it probably wasnt right for them to be banned, however, i dont see why they couldnt just be unbanned. i think that theyre getting lumped in with coy severely here and truthfully that isnt fair to them. i dont know how i would go about the downgrade from 6 to 2, but what i do know is they were being pretty polite about it

coy on the other hand...

throughout the screens they just seem to keep throwing salt into the wound, working through loopholes and being petty just for the sake of it. their behavior i would argue is still deplorable, and their unwillingness to work constructively is probably the reason why they and civ werent included in the discussion. ive gone over coy a million times before, these screens just keep hammering the point home

besides that, there are a couple other things to note:

Tycho's lack of presence

Tycho (furthermore referred to as cal) diverting the discussion to others is something that has happened before, and can be a point of criticism against him, but honestly my personal opinion is that shit happens sometimes. cal has very valid reasons to want to pull away from the discussion, especially with the myo compensation event he seems to be giving his best despite the situation. i am willing to give cal a lot of leeway when it comes to being stressed because we have seen the work that he and his team are putting in. i mean ffs we already have new pet species concepts not even a day after the old ones were removed. hes got a lot on his plate, and coys un-reasonability and demanding things be done NOW would drive anyone crazy even if they werent already dealing with species AND irl responsibilities. you could argue that cal shouldnt be in a place of ownership if he cant take the heat which is a valid criticism, however i think that hes a fine owner, good even, its just that these situations keep popping up one after another and he just cant keep up. these arent things that normal species owners deal with

"disgusting"

so regarding these screens (because i know some civ/coy whiteknights are gonna try and use it to excuse all their actions)

listen, was it the most professional way to respond? no. but also: (assuming it was cal who said these) i would argue this is a totally valid argument. granted, probably not to be directed at civ, but still valid. if i was dealing with the same continued problems from people who arent supposed to even be a part of the project anymore, i would have blown my lid way worse. this comment isnt even that egregious to me, its just that civ and coy have created such an echo chamber that any criticism is seen as sacrilege, and given cal's previously mentioned stressors its completely understandable for him to react harshly when they have to deal with coy drilling up his ass and being petty for no reason

civ's final words

the screens speak for themselves here. i do think there are some things to be criticized relating to civs bulletin (particularly comments painting them as this poor sad puppy dog tossed in the rain) but ultimately they are not as much of a villain in this as coy is. best course of action honestly is to just leave them alone, they were pretty professional in the screens and just seem to want to be done with it

final verdict? coy is an ass. civ kind of isnt. it could have been done differently but i really understand why it wasnt. cal needs a break. new mods are still doing good in my eyes.

and terravent fans eat good tonight

[431989]

okay fuck it we ball im posting resident alien stuff here. hyperfixation time. spoilers below so be warned.

im sooo bummed over the recent ep. the gripe i have w every single piece of media happened agaiiinnnnn. can i have ONE thing that doesnt force relationship arcs. especially ones that dont fit the initial or continuing tone of the shoooow. <--- edit again to clarify. i loved the tone of s1. i want that back. its getting too comedyish.

like i rlly connected w harry esp the fact he wasnt really getting infatuated with anyone but this whole horned up episode was grating to watch. like i still think there were sweet moments but boooo 🍅💥🍅💥 im hoping its just for some sort of conflict and that itll get squashed come the next few eps. (ALSO EDIT: at least the thing with harry and isabelle was palatable. gahhh im just peeved….)

s1 was so baller too like it had good clever comedy and still had drama to it. like im hoping the very like… bland surface level humor gets dialed back. like its soooo forced to me. but i guess thats what the average viewer likes which is dog doodoo. dont make it a sitcom please im begging. it was soooo unique.

i will be rewatching season 1 for the 5th time tonight but another thing i noticed is the increased use of like… musical scores. its like one step removed from a laugh track. gahh.

anyways im a harry asta supporter also harry joseph supporter so this forced stuff hurts to watch esp bc it doesnt fit character to me. considering harrys whole thing so far has been about developing and realizing connections, the sudden shift to horniness just! isnt consistent. not to be autistic or anything haha.

speaking of! i think its boring and cheap to have this alien/alien thing going on. and also feels really like.. “nd people can never fit in so they have to be with other nd people.” i think i wouldnt be so turned away if it was more genuine. but this is a comedy ig, i just wish it was handled differently. its uninteresting to meeeee. like an alien/alien thing can work but not like this. gives very nd are forever seen as weird and are therefor ostracized. like it feels othering to me. ESP BC OF HOW FORCED UGHHHHHHH i hate forced romance shit so much. perhaps thats an unpopular take but i said what i said! sudden nonmeaningful stuff like this i feel will kill the show. i wouldnt be surprised if it fizzles out.

UM ALSO? tudyk bringing up shape of water on insta abt the newest ep????? i dont think so???????? i never watched that but i kind of know what it was about and it certainly wasnt fish on fish love. smdh. like i feel like the reason why it was so big when it came out was (albeit as someone who hasnt watched it and have surface level understanding) bc it was between a lady and fish guy. and it was heartfelt. not to be harry asta or anything but that was already developing so like. AGHHHUU. even a harry joseph dynamic i can get around in a way bc theres room for development. also itd be gay so thats a plus.

anyways i might check out the graphic novels. told myself i wouldnt bc my brain works weird but maybe itd be a good idea to get into that. unfortunately i will probably be begrudgingly keeping up bc im hyperfixated on it. GAHHHGG anyways ramble rant over.

edit ps: i will also clarify that if asta were to be written out to be nd i would be just as pleased if not more pleased. im just not liking how this is going so far. tomato tomato tomato

[peachjuiceretriever]

exhales thru my nose. i really needed to put these feelings SOMEWHERE and i apolgoize. please ignore i am venting this is a vent post i repeat this is a personal vent post. you are not obligated to read.

SIGHS... i dunno. it fuckin. it wasnt even just he was nice and sweet i felt so comfortable sharing my kinks with him and he was literally open to anything and that was so nice... sex is very important to me in a relationship so having someone who was just as adventurous as me... and he thought everything i did was cute... called me cute all the time... even when he came to visit and saw me completely naked in real life... he saw every inch of my body and he didnt just continue to love me it felt like he loved me even more... it felt like once he saw me that was when he knew i was the one... at least... thats what it felt like to me... thats how i felt... he was always so interested in everything i had to say, so excited for every opportunity i had to grow.. ughhh i fucking!!! bangs my head on a wall. why did you do this to me... i remember expressing to you how scared i was that you'd choose someone else, that someone else would catch your eye and you'd look back at me and realize im not worth it- the time, the effort, the energy it takes to love me... and you told me "why would i ever do that? they're not you" and i fucking believed you!!!!!!! and we... we fucking planned !! on moving in together!!! i was genuinely ok with moving to a different state, starting a new life just for you because you had stuff already established down there!!! and now i....

i hate the way i want to be loved. how fucking selfish of me to want someone to hold my hand to go through journeys with me... i hate being a traumatized child in an adult body. the way my parents set me up for failure... i hate how i went through therapy and thought i had all of this under control now... the fact that my brain can go "you need to love yourself, nobody can do it for you." but it doesn't take away the pain. "this too shall pass" but it doesn't soothe the ache in your throat. if you dont break the cycle it will continue to repeat itself this feeling is only temporary it is what it is and you can't change it sometimes things are bad before they get good and i know i know i know i know but it hurts now goddamn it it hurts now and it'll hurt tomorrow and the next day and every single fucking time i think about the airport, or his state is mentioned on tv, or i drive by a fucking starbucks!!!!!!!!!