#i wasn't always like this really
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🧍🏾♀️
#oops im rambling#am just talking abt my mental helth in the tags#i have no motivation to do anything#i must force myself to do everything#i spend all my time alone#bc my parents keep me locked in this house#and i dont have the energy to fight for myself even a little bit#but i lay down and look at images on my phone#and in the silent peaceful moments#it almost doesn't feel like im wasting away in my cage#but thats not the point of this#i just mean to say that i just lay in bed all day#and i cant bring myself to do things i used to enjoy#like reading or writing or making art#im trying to make more art but thats only so i can make money#not really for my own enjoyment#i don't even watch tv or anime anymore#its too hard#i wasn't always like this really#the only thing i do consistently now is journaling#i dont even feel sad abt it but i just c dont feel like doing anything
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The new generation leaders
#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#jiang cheng#jin zixuan#nie huaisang#mo dao zu shi#the untamed#my art#i redesigned them a bit again what gives!!#i always said i wasn't too fond of my jzx and nhs but i think i like these versions!#i really like nhs with shorter hair or hairdos#and jzx with straighter hair and these kind of jewleries look both rich but also humble which is exactly what i wanted to hit#jiang cheng would pop out more in full body ver but he's always kinda same-ish he just works#messy yllz wwx is the goat and i will not have him any other way thank you#also lwj being as simple and elegant and flowy as possible...yes please
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I feel like we really lost something when we started looking at writing as a reader-centric product meant to appeal to the desires of a specific audience rather than a writer-centric approach of someone writes whatever particular thing particular compels them/whatever weird thing the demons in their head want to talk about, and people out there who are also compelled, and/or relate, find that writing. A lot of discussions of writing really center around what readers want rather than a writer's exploration. Sometimes as a reader I don't know what I want. I click on a fic or pick up a book I'm not sure about but that looks interesting, and I love it. Reading what I expect to get is it's own joy, but we always need to expand our horizons and not get mad at creators for not always writing what we want/expect.
#This applies to other media too#Like movies or TV or theater#Idk man like#It's a very the customer is always right attitude with books these days#And I think it has leaked into fic writing as well#People really get the “this isn't what I personally enjoyed” and “this thing is objectively bad” mixed up#Like people can leave whatever reviews they want on my books they paid for it#But I've had people who liked OFMD be like well I didn't like this because it wasn't OFMD#Well I didn't say it was did I?#And never forget that fic commenter I got who was like um I don't like that you had QuinObi in this but otherwise it was good#Ok???#KCrabb rambles#Writing things
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nishi really wanted to make sure everybody 100% knew iruma a freak lmao
#mairuma#iruma suzuki#Clara valac#M!ik#Tbh it was always a thing that iruma was like that™️ but there something so funny about it being straight out confirm in a chapter now#That yes iruma is certified freak and probably would have not mind this kinda treatment if he and azz wasn't trapped#Freakuma really#/hj#Iruma really do be like I haven't experienced this type of love before and I'm not complaining!!!#There a funny irony with iruma the human being into while azz isn't too keen#Not completely against it but still kdjdjdkdkdkd#mairimashita! iruma kun
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some sam drakes :)
nate's theme 4.0 came up on my playlist while I was working on commissions and oh boy. that piano line about a minute in to it still gets me emotional shshdshs
#ANYWAY. sam's role as a sort of narrative ghost. fun! fascinating! devastating! someone play mikky ekko's who are you really#he's your brother he's a stranger he's all you had you & you have to relearn who he is--- i gotta lay down. jesus christ#uncharted#sam drake#GOD i fucking love the uncharted soundtracks. the strings! the chorus in the 4.0 theme!!! wind instruments!!!!!!!!!!!!!! aughghghgGHGH#LMAO i have such fond memories of this game. it's the only uncharted game ive personally played (ive always been Too Broke#to afford a console) (when the game came out my roommate at the time had a ps4 and my OTHER housemate had the game#and wasn't interested in playing it so I would play it at like 2am haha) (oh those were the days. the days when i could stay up late#like that and bounce back from it in the morning)
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Bros before Ho(oh my god is that Hanguang-Jun?)
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jiang cheng#WWX really was unhinged for saying he was going to always be at JC's side and then immediately asking about LWJ.#The D in ADHD stands for Distractible. The second D stands for DooowawawaWaaaah (ADHDers know what I mean)#Their conversation is such a knife twist in this flashback. WWX truly and genuinely does mean it when he says he wants to support JC#And that JC hopes for that too! Tragedies hit the hardest when you can feel the lost futures characters would have together#And I feel it here in this scene so painfully. There's complicated feelings between them but it wasn't what broke them apart.#The rumours and the twisted family dynamics that tried to pit them against each other likely wouldnt have worked.#It set the stage for JC to have an inferiority complex which then grows into his responsibility complex.#WWX even calls it out! That JC has to be the responsible one in the dynamic.#And it sucks to be in that unequal position with a sibling or a not-sibling.#You don't get the love *or* acknowledgement but you do get the pressure to be the 'better one' in the face of the other's misbehaviour.#But I digress. There was a world where they did became the twin heroes of yunmeng jiang and stayed together.#And we'll never see it. That world is gone now. And just like Lotus pier -even if they tried to rebuild it - they will never be the same.
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tried really hard to capture some of his whimsy
#this truly is a practice piece i wanted to try practicing both capturing likeness and drawing a smile#and honestly got so frustrated and kind of gave up and did whatever after strugling with the face so much like i didn't even try with the#clothes anymore and just simplified but they ended up looking better than the face maybe bc i wasn't trying so hard lmao#but i had fun he's occupying so much of my brainspace rn unfortunately#and i really tried to capture xiao zhan's likeness and his beautiful smile :) and i think in the end it worked out ok? like wei wuxian's#whimsy is there i think. like still need to refine and all that to better capture all that but first attempt!#long tags but i really was going through something#he's my bestie my beloved <3 silly little guy <3#wei wuxian#wei ying#mdzs#grandmaster of demonic cultivation#the untamed#wei wuxian fanart#mdzs fanart#the untamed fanart#my art#digital art#<- i always feel weird putting so many tags but also feel the need to try to accurately categorise#in a bewitched state currently. like it really is dire for me#posted and immediately deleted and posted again. tumblr fucked up my colours </3 it still turns green when i upload </3 can't fix it </3
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i lied i had like atleast one more weston thought to expell from my brain, before i miss this boat entirely. we're heading to green lands woooo
#god i had a fever this entire morning and afternoon so I think it was my inability to do anything that finally pushed me to finish this#seriously it took a month... disapointing#more disappointing is that i didn't have the time to tear up the internet in order to find what a professors break room looked like in 1899#if there was such a thing#really tragic#ah yea welp im very glad it's out there atleast. I want to release all of my black butler stuff so badly but guh...#tragedy has struck and i have been inspired to finally make a person project of my own#so that's taking a long time#but not to worry after like 5 years and some pondering i know well that black butler will always be one half of my brain#coooool#anyway i got more dorky stuff coming I hope??? wasn't lying before I am thinking of the midfords#and ill pray i can find the strength to get everything done soon#hope my rants are more tasteful after months of absence if ur still here#kuroshitsuji#black butler#kuroshitsuji fanart#fanart#sebastian michaelis#digital art#animation#animatic#video#weston college arc#black butler anime#black butler agares
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thinking about the swathe of Tim & Dick disagreements that can be broadly patterned, "Dick is more openly distraught and ends up chewing out Tim before stalking off, while Tim's left standing there like 🧍♂️"
New Titans #61 (A Lonely Place of Dying, Part 4) Gotham Knights #26 (Bruce Wayne: Murderer? Part 10) Nightwing (1996) #110
and the sort of opposite, where Tim is more openly distraught and they end up physically fighting each other
Nightwing (1996) #139 (The Resurrection of Ra's al Ghul, Part 6) Red Robin (2009) #4
anyway no deep thoughts, I just love them and I'm rotating their arguments in my brain at all times, lol
(bonus: the direct reverse of the first category, with Tim more openly distraught with and chewing out Dick before stalking off, leaving Dick standing there like 🧍♂️)
Red Robin (2009) #1
#these are generalizations of course lol#there's always a back-and-forth between them even in the ones where someone is left like 🧍♂️ at the end#while the other makes a dramatic exit#also whenever I see someone generalizing that they're unrealistically affectionate always-get-along brothers I'm like *squints*#they deliberately choose to maintain that affectionate dynamic and work for it#or people saying Red Robin caused such a terrible rift because they'd never really fought before#or that it was the first time Tim was forced to realize Dick wasn't perfect#*squints* *gestures at the above* *gestures at Prodigal where Dick is a mess and constantly lamenting this fact to Tim*#*gestures at all the times Tim has witnessed Dick having shouting and/or physical fights with Bruce*#they run the full gamut of siblinghood okay#they've been through so much together and they know they can get past conflicts with each other because they've done it before#Dick and Tim#Dick & Tim#Tim Drake#Dick Grayson#dcu#batfam#DC Comics panels#post tag#comics reading tag
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i wonder how many more people would've vehemently hated gale right off the bat on full release if his introduction conversation had stayed like this or something similar
#i wasn't realy involved in any discussions during ea but i do know a lot of people didn't trust or like gale then#but i always really loved the wind imagery he uses with his phrasing here#and the way he casually walks out of the portal like it's effortless and then stands over you literally talking down to you#in the full release your first impression of him is a guy stuck with no way to free himself without your help#then when you do help him he's very friendly and kind and doesnt come across as threatening at all. and you talk to him on level ground#even his most dismissive remark about the player's magic or lack of it just after meeting him doesn't come across as strong as this one imo#also. i have like no other clips from ea saved other than this one lol#baldur's gate#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep#★
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going through some old logs, and I need you to understand just how truly unhinged early 2010s RP omegle was.
genuinely you could stay on there for hours with just one person, hashing out complex traumatic backstories, drawn-out love confessions, detailed action scenes...collaboratively describing graphic violence, past abuse, comfort, hurt/comfort, hurt/no comfort, any number of sex acts...and then one of you would be like, "oh haha it's 2AM! I have to sleep :(" and the other person would say, "omg saaaame. :( gnight!!!" and then you'd exit the chat and never speak to each other again, and this was. fine.
you could just spend an entire evening shoving your wretched, bleeding soul into a chat log with someone you'd never meet or learn the name of, achieve some form of emotional catharsis, and then go about your day or night like this was an average way to spend your time.
I'm really normal about this, actually
#sbs rambles#omegle#it wasn't always serious ofc. there was a lot of lighthearded silliness#but I usually went in for the darker sadder stuff that built up to a happy ending#there's really a special form of intimacy when you and an internet stranger are each controlling a fictional character#and describing them doing things like bandaging each other's wounds#checking each other for bruises. asking them to talk about what they've been through. great stuff!#I hope there are still places where people do stuff like this. like I know there are forums and servers for this but that's not the same.#and I mean. I keep thinking ''there must be other places like this!'' but then I remember the goodbye message when omegle shut down#and...I dunno. the internet is different now#we don't live in that world anymore#anyway if you ever RP'd sherlock stuff on omegle you might have talked to me. :) we might have written something together#and despite it being superwholock-era fandom “cringe”#I'm proud of that#that was a really important part of my life#it was fun :) though I definitely had issues I wasn't willing to confront yet lmao#and I wish I had saved more of the logs :/#oh! I also liked the moments where you'd have to take a break#like you could be right in the middle of something intense and then the other person would be like#(brb I have to finish making dinner for my husband) and you'd say (sure!)#and then 20mins later you'd start up again where you left off
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Looking for answers (or highlights in the way)
#mezato I like her so much#the spirit of curiosity in a person who is always seeking for a reason#for a spotlight in the world. for anything that catches her eye#and that may one day elevate her to the status of Someone and soothe her pushful ills#so much determination for a young body#unrestrained. with a pinch of... imprudence and bossiness; at times#but always a very passionate soul#I'm really proud of how the panelling turned out here!! I'm not usually good at panels you see#she is so cool... mezato my love my dear daughter girl who wasn't 100% nice or perfect but I really like her#mp100#mob psycho 100#mp100 fanart#ichi mezato#mezato ichi#lalarts
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Saturday Night - 2024
October 11th 1975
Gilda: "You get to be the hot one." Laraine: "Jane's the hot one." Jane: "I'm the mom... The still fuckable mom."
#Saturday Night#Saturday Night 2024#Spoilers#Saturday Night Spoilers#The Not Ready for Prime Time Players#dan aykroyd#chevy chase#Jane Curtin#garrett morris#Laraine Newman#Gilda Radner#Cory Michael Smith#Ella Hunt#Dylan O'Brien#Emily Fairn#Lamorne Morris#Kim Matula#my gifs#movie edits#Movies : Biopic#Movies : Saturday Night#I like it very much they did a great job and not just the not ready for prime time players#everyone was great I am so excited to watch it again hopefully soon#Also as a Jane fan I am SOOO glad the let her be fun and playful#I think Jane gets a wrap for being very strict and straight when really she's just discipline and hard working#but she is also insanely quick witted and funny and playful and the movie portrayed that which I love#I also loved that the movie wasn't about the not ready for prime time players it was about Loren and trying to pull the show together#but the cast was still there and they each had a moment#I also loved that the girls were almost always together playing around in the background#SNL 50
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flowers :D
#i was part way through the lineart when i last worked on it but i wasn't liking how it was coming out so#i just deleted that layer and made a few adjustments to the sketch#I always really liked this doodle I wouldn't want it to just sit in my files and never see the light of day#this is based off that one drawing idek#shima!!! deserves!!!! flowers!!!!!!#gosh i just love them both so much#skip and loafer#skip to loafer#shima x mitsumi#mitsumi iwakura#shima sousuke
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Hear me out: you can ship JayVik without falling into or using rhetoric that fits the disposable black girlfriend trope. You can ship JayVik without using Mel as some conceived ploy or antagonistic plot device that makes her out of character. You can ship JayVik without falling into misogynistic rhetoric (eg. viewing female characters as disposable or stepping tools, amongst other things). You can ship JayVik without erasing the impact Mel has had on Jayce and their relationship because, whether you shipped it or not or even gave it the time of day, Mel and Jayce did care for each other, and to deny that or say Viktor held more importance/impact than her in Jayce's life to where she's viewed as "unnecessary" just to further your ship is so wrong and, whether you intended for it or not, does carry undertones where black characters, especially black female characters, emotional impact on others is ignored or downplayed even though there's context to support just how important it is/they are. Lastly, you can ship JayVik without using anti-black and misogynoir type rhetoric because the amount that has flooded this fandom, but especially from some fans of this ship, is atrocious. Ship what you like, but be respectful and careful with certain things you say, is all I'm saying.
#arcane#mel medarda#jayce talis#arcane viktor#it's very sad that this still has to be said but no surprising in fandom especially when it comes to m/m ships & a female character#like misogyny (internalized too) becomes rampant but if they are woc then there's and added layer of racism to the mix#since day one mel has been demonized & even if you believe that she used jayce for gain why only hate on her for it & ignore how not only#is this a commom theme in arcane as the show has many questionable morally aligned characters#who don't get as much hate but that also now viktor is in the same shoes as well bc wasn't he manipulating space & time so that jayce always#finds hextech and becomes his partner? acting as if whatever “manipulation” mel did regarding jayce didn't help him move up in society & get#funding#it's also really gross how the fandom and even some of the arcane crew use rhetoric of using female characters as throwaways for this#pairing bc women should not be used as step stools for men's growth than ignored when it's time for them to reflect how they got there#(eg. sky)#this isn't even hate towards jayvik as i don't even mind it but some of the fans of it make it very off-putting#like they're this ships worst enemy sometimes!#jayvik#anti jayvik#but more so in the tags#meljay#kinda...? like it's referred to in the tags and some of the post too ig
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Thomas and his pain they let you pass through but they wouldn't' let me pass!
#I always have a feeling that they let him live just to make him suffer#like death is too easy#again genius writing Steven Knight#English/British writers always hit me differently#they always deliver more of a depth of whatever story they were writing#I think I have gifed everything I wanted to gif this series#really looking for the film version becauseeeee#“It seems like Tommy Shelby wasn't finished with me..”#cillian murphy#peaky blinders#I put my heart into every gifset I’ve made#thomas shelby#parellels
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