#i was trying to move in from that mistake
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mattybsgroupie · 1 day ago
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— tub ★ matt sturniolo
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— CONTENTS: established relationship; making out; semi-public sex; p in v; creampie; sub!matt
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— NOTES: i literally gasped when i saw that pic and i just had to tell @mattscoquette how much i needed hot tub sex with him. well
 here it is! i know i have so many requests but i promise i’m gonna write them all! not proofread as usual, i apologize for any mistakes, hope you enjoy it ♡
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“finally” matt mumbled under his breath as he watched chris drink his last sip of soda before wrapping himself in a towel and getting inside the house. you chuckled at his comment, dragging your arms across the warm liquid that embraced you and moving towards matt. “why? i thought you were having fun”.
“i will have fun” he said, reaching for your hands and interlocking your fingers in each other’s palms as he pulled you closer, face to face with him. “now that it’s only us” .
“you’re so lucky water distorts the actual form of things” you teased, placing your forearms around his shoulders and comfortably positioning yourself on his lap, feeling matt’s boner against you. “i could tell you were hard 30 minutes ago” you continued, index flickering around matt’s necklace. you went further, bringing the chain in between your teeth before closing your lips around the cold metal, deeply staring inside his blue orbs.
“it’s not my fault” matt whispered, not being able to keep his eyes off of you. “not when you look this good” he allowed his hands to travel across your body, stopping by your hips and forcing them down. you gasped with the sudden contact, matt’s cock seemed to have gotten even harder if that was possible.
the purple, blueish light that shimmered from the corners of the tub along with the warm bubbles turned the moment intimate, and matt couldn’t help it — he pressed his chapped lips on your neck, licking the tiny droplets of water there.
you let out a heavy sigh, letting go of his chain and tilting your head to the side, allowing matt to go further. his stubble tickled against your skin as the kisses got more heated, his teeth gently nibbling on your exposed neck.
lost in matt’s touch, your hips started moving in a pace of their own, slowly grinding your covered pussy against matt’s hardened cock. the pressure caused by the water intensified the proximity of your parts, causing matt to groan in a low tone, trying his best to stay quiet.
“my good boy doesn’t wanna be loud?” you teased and matt threw his head back, squeezing his eyes shut. “mhm” he nodded, “don’t call me that”.
“why? you don’t want chris to know his big brother is all worked up from a little grinding?” matt nods again. your thumb hovered over his lips, brushing above the lower one before pulling it down in a pout. “use your big boy words” you demand as matt sticks his tongue out, licking your digit.
“need you” matt whined, his grip on your waist growing tighter. “need you so bad, please” he repeated, slightly jerking his pelvis upwards, a silent plead for you to notice his aching cock. you leaned in and sealed your lips together, intensifying the kiss as your hands traced their way down his torso, your nails scratching his chest.
matt’s hands went to your ass, harshly grabbing your flesh and lifting you from his lap. you took the opportunity to quickly pull his shorts — just enough to free his dick from the swimwear he was wearing. you could tell matt’s eyes were wandering around the backyard, as if he was checking if you were actually alone. you cupped his cheeks, forcing him to look at you and smiling warmly, letting him know he didn’t have to worry about a thing.
his sneaky fingers reached the straps of your bikini, easily undoing the tie and letting the black fabric hang loose, your bare pussy now only a few inches away from his shaft. matt guided you towards his length, lowering your cunt on his tip. you let out a deep sigh before fully sitting on him, his dick opening you up entirely. “fuck fuck fuck” he whimpered, “s-so tight fuck”.
“be a good boy hm? you want to shut you up?” you said, trying your best to keep your composure. matt’s veins pumped inside you, his tip brushing on your cervix. “nhng— yes
 can’t be loud”. you chuckled at his eagerness, pressing your lips against his once more and sliding your tongue in, twirling the wet muscle around his own.
“you’re so big” you said amidst the kiss before pulling away, flickering your gaze from his lips to where your parts met. “look how good you fill me up hm?” matt nodded. it all felt too good. almost too much. he had been staring at you for hours, and his cock was throbbing underneath that bathing suit. the warm water around his body, your hands pressing his biceps, your pussy squeezing him. “you’re right here” you said, gently grabbing his wrist and placing his palm on your tummy.
“please i-i need toâ€”ïżœïżœïżœ matt whimpered, his grip on your ass growing tighter as he bucked his hips upwards, mindlessly pounding inside you. you felt your own high approaching, the familiar knot on your lower belly begging to be released. “cum! please!” matt cried out loud. you shushed him, grabbing his jaw and lifting his chin up. moans came from the back of his throat, and you had no other choice but to bring your fingers to his open mouth. matt immediately wrapped his lips around your knuckles, sucking them with all his might.
“good boy” you praised him, receiving a muffled whine from him. “cum for me baby, fill me up” as you gave him permission, matt’s entire body trembled underneath you. his orgasm washed over him and his release threw you over the edge, the warm, thick spurts of cum painting your walls white.
matt panted heavily, tiny droplets of water dripping from his brown strands. none of you wanted to let go or get up, the comfort of being in each other’s embrace being enough to fall asleep right there — and you wouldn’t mind cockwarming him for the rest of the night. unfortunately, you still had to find your bikini panties and he had to make sure his brothers were already asleep. “hey, at least we didn’t make any messes huh?” he joked, giving you one last kiss before getting up and turning the lights from the hot tub off.
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— TAGLIST ★ @thepubeburgler @submattenthusiast @pearlzier @mattsfavbitchhh @bugeyedgrl @sturncakez @riowritesitall @mattsturnswife @sturnsmia @sturnthepot @mattscoquette @conspiracy-ash @ilovemattsturn @lizzymacdonald06 @blahbel668 @fratbrochrisgf @sturnobsessedwh0re @cayleeuhithinknott @sturniolo04 @1c3b4th @mattsfavbigtitties @bellassturniolo @sturnsxplr-25 @ivammbb @shadowthesim237 @slutformatthewsturniolo @stefansring @teeheeomg @dystfopia @riasturns @faiyaz555 @sturnslutz @alesturniolos @emely9274 @courta13 @elandrys @sturns-mermaid @mattsplaything @marrykisskilled @bells-sturn @mattsgstring @strnilolover @jetaimevous @aaliyahsturniolo @evie-sturns @ivysturnss
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complete masterlist ★ matt masterlist
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sergeantbarnessdoll · 3 days ago
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Hi!! I was hoping I could request a fic where the reader is clumsy as fuck.
And when Bucky and reader go on their first date, he notices bruises scattered over the reader and gets worried that someone in their life is hurting them. Which reader insist, "no I'm safe I'm just clumsy as shit" which he's heard too many times before so he remains unsure.
BUT as the dates go on, he begins to realise just how honest they were being. Hes constantly having to stop the reader from walking into poles and tables, he's catching things before they can hit the ground (including the reader), and when they come home he kisses all their bruises or marks.
And when they finally are becoming more intimate, he's scared of bruising/ hurting the reader and they have to convince him that they aren't made of glass and to just go for it.
Not Made Of Glass » Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier
Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
Summary: Bucky gets worried when sees bruises on you and you assure him that you’re just clumsy.
Warnings: Fluff, tiny bit of implied Smut (18+), language, clumsy!reader, bruises (not abuse), kissing, pet names
A/N: Thank you for the request, nonnieđŸ©”
Written on my phone. My apologies for any mistakes.
Header made by @buck-star
GIF IS NOT MINE! Gif credit goes to the creator.
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!🔞
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You and Bucky are on yours and his first date. As you were telling him about yourself, Bucky couldn’t help but notice that you have a couple bruises on your arm and one on your shoulder. It worried him. He’s starting to think that someone gave you those bruises.
“I’m sorry to interrupt you.” Bucky apologizes politely. “How did you get those bruises?” He asks curiously.
“Oh, those? My friend’s son was trying to teach me how to skateboard, but I ended up falling and that’s how I got these.” You explained.
The thought of someone abusing you lingered in his mind.
“Are you sure?” He asks.
“Of course I am.” You replied.
“Is someone hurting you, doll?” He asks, keeping his voice low so no one heard him.
“No, I’m safe. I’m just clumsy as shit.” You say with an assuring smile.
Bucky smiles back. He still couldn’t help but let that suspicion linger around in his mind. He’s heard that one too many times.
“The only reason why I asked is because I want to make sure you’re safe.” He says softly.
“You’re sweet to care and worry, Bucky.” You smiled. “Those are my two favorite qualities I like in a man.” You say, sipping your drink.
“If someone is hurting you, I’d make sure that won’t happen ever again.” He says.
You knew what he meant when he said that. You also know he said it to protect you. That’s another quality you like in a man. You and Bucky are going to get along just fine.
You invited Bucky out for coffee the following morning. You walked in the coffee shop, smiling when you saw Bucky. You were so happy to see Bucky again that you didn’t notice the chair next to you and you ran into it. Bucky looked up from the newspaper he was reading to see you moving a chair out of your way.
“Are you ok?” Bucky asks.
“Yes. I just didn’t see the chair.” You say with a small giggle.
You gave Bucky a kiss on his cheek before ordering coffee and sat down at the table across from him. You crossed your leg over the other. Bucky found another bruise, but this time, on your shin. It’s a little bit bigger compared to the ones on your arm and shoulder.
“What happened to your leg?” Bucky asks, pointing at the bruise on your shin.
“I walked into a tow hitch on a pickup truck a couple days ago.” You tell him honestly.
The suspicion of something abusing you is still on his mind, but he also believes your honesty. It doesn’t hurt to be cautious and suspicious of something, right?
A few days later, Bucky asked you out on another date. He went over to your house to pick you up. You invited him inside while you finished up getting ready. Bucky looked around your house, admiring the pictures and decorations.
“I’m ready!” You announced with a smile.
Bucky smiles, admiring your beauty and outfit. He winces to himself as you walked into the doorframe, hitting your arm on it as you were walking out of your bedroom.
That looked like it hurt.” Bucky says.
“Only a little bit, but I’m ok.” You say.
“May I?” He asks softly.
You nodded. Bucky gently lifted your arm up to his lips, kissing the red mark that will soon be a bruise on the side of your arm. You couldn’t help but blush when he did that.
“You’re really sweet, you know that?” You say with a smile.
“I care about you is all, doll.” He says softly.
“I care about you too, Bucky.” You say in almost a whisper.
Bucky gently caressed your cheek and kissed you softly and sweetly. You put your hands on his shoulders to steady yourself. You’ve never been this mind blown by a kiss in your life.
“Woah
” You say, completely speechless when he pulled away.
Bucky smiles at the speechless expression on your face.
“You ready to go?” He asks softly.
“More than ready.” You answered with a smile.
When you and Bucky got to the restaurant, he’s starting to realize that you’re right about being a clumsy person. You almost walked into a table and he gently moved you away from it so you didn’t give yourself another bruise.
“Careful, doll.” Bucky whispers.
“I am being careful.” You say softly, kissing his cheek.
Over the next few weeks, you and Bucky went on dates every weekend. In those weeks, Bucky has been moving you away from things like tables or poles before you walked into them so you didn’t hurt yourself. Today, Bucky tagged along with you while you ran errands. Bucky swore he ages 10 years every time you run into something or almost run into something.
“Wanna get coffee?” You asked, pointing at the coffee shop across the street.
“Sure.” Bucky answers.
You and Bucky looked both ways before crossing the street. When you guys got to the other side of the street, you tripped over the curb and Bucky caught you before you fell.
“Are you ok, doll?” He asks softly.
“I am now.” You smiled up at him.
You guys went inside of the coffee shop. You somehow tripped over your own feet. Bucky grabbed your arm before you fell.
“I think it’s time to go home.” He says.
“But I want coffee.” You pouted.
You pouting is one of Bucky’s many weaknesses. He can’t say no to you when you pout.
“Ok, fine.” He gives in.
You squeaked softly and kissed his cheek. To keep you from running into anything, Bucky put his hands on your waist and guided you to the counter to order coffee. You two got coffee and then went home.
“You know what to do, doll.” Bucky says.
Bucky now kisses every bruise you get. You took your -Bucky’s- sweatshirt off and rolled your pant legs up, revealing the few bruises you got over the past couple days. You smiled as you watched him kiss each bruise on your arms softly. You then sat down on the couch and he crouched down in front of you and kissed the couple bruises you have on your legs and one on your knee.
ïżœïżœïżœI love how much you care about me.” You say softly, running your fingers through his hair.
“It’s part of my job as your boyfriend to care about you, doll.” Bucky says, sitting down next to you on the couch.
“You want to be my boyfriend?” You asked.
“Only if you want to be my girlfriend.” He says.
“I want nothing more than to be your girlfriend, Bucky.” You say with a smile.
Bucky smiles and kisses you. The kiss got heated quickly. You two fell back against the couch. He put his weight on his forearms so he didn’t crush you. You wrapped your legs around his waist to pull him closer to you.
“You know, I don’t mind if you lay on top of me.” You say.
“I know. I just don’t want to hurt you in any way.” He says.
“You can never hurt me, baby.” You almost whispered, running your fingers through his hair.
“I just want to be cautious.” He says.
“I’m not made of glass, you know.” You say.
“I know.” He mumbles softly. “I love you so much and don’t like seeing you get hurt.” He says.
“I love you too.” You pecked his lips softly. “I won’t mind if you’re a little bit rough with me in the bedroom.” You say seductively.
Bucky leans his forehead against your shoulder and groans softly, dirty thought flowing into his mind.
“There’s safe words for a reason, baby.” You whispered in his ear.
A shiver went down his spine when you kissed just below his ear, a soft moan leaving his lips.
“Fuck
” Bucky moans softly.
Bucky stood up and picked you up, carrying you to the bedroom. An excited squeal left your lips. He gently laid you down on the bed and got on top of you.
“You’ll use a safe word if I’m too rough on you?” He asks just to be sure, rubbing the tops of your thighs.
“Yes.” You answered with a smile.
“You’re in for a long night, babydoll.” He almost whispers.
“Bring it on, baby.” You say softly, bitting your bottom lip.
đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”đŸ©”
-Bucky’s Doll
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[Text below taken from previous post^^^ for ease of searching]
4 year-olds
ï»żï»żHave trouble with close visual activities like reading and writing
ï»żï»żFine motor skills are not well developed
ï»żï»żOften very clumsy
ï»żï»żEnergetic and active
ï»żï»żFriendly and talkative
ï»żï»żNeed adult help finding words to express their needs
ï»żï»żEasily redirected from unwanted behavior
ï»żï»żImaginative
ï»żï»żExperiment with language (including swears they hear adults use)
ï»żï»żShort attention spans
ï»żï»żCan learn responsibilities like room cleaning but need guidance and models
ï»żï»żTypically can't read but they do understand stories and often display complex thinking
ï»żï»żThinking is almost exclusively concrete (what they can see and feel
5 year-olds
ï»żï»żTypically go through a growth spurt
ï»żï»żMay write letters and numbers backwards
ï»żï»żBetter control of lange muscles but still frequently fall out of chairs
ï»żï»żStill struggle somewhat with fine motor skills
ï»żï»żWant adult approval
ï»żï»żClasses in Kindergarten are usually 15 to 20 minutes
ï»żï»żInterpret words literally
ï»żï»żOlder fives like to explain things that have been explained to them
ï»żï»żPoor sense of time (they have no idea how long 5 minutes is)
ï»żï»żRanely see things from another person's view
ï»żï»żAbstract concepts like "fairness" are confusing
ï»żï»żVivid imagination and limited life experience lead to leaps in logic (my toys are alive / the trees move when its windy so the tress make wind
6 year-olds
ï»żï»żMore developed fine motor skills
ï»żï»żSchool work is often rushed because they care more about the product than the process
ï»żï»żHighly competitive and sensitive to criticism
ï»żï»żTypically begin forming closer friendships (first best friend)
ï»żï»żLove jokes and guessing games
ï»żï»żVery curious and ask a lot of questions
ï»żï»żBetter understanding of time (can understand historical events relative to present-day)
ï»żï»żUsually can read simple books independently but they frequentty misspell words (city becomes sity)
*These younger years have a lot of development so there is a huge difference between a kid that just turned five and a kid that's five and a half.
7 year-olds
ï»żï»żImproved gross and fine motor skills
ï»żï»żOften begin preferring video games to outdoor games
ï»żï»żEmpathetic and sensitive to others feelings
ï»żï»żPrefer working alone or with one friend
ï»żï»żMay worry that nobody likes them (increasing awareness of others thoughts)
ï»żï»żStrong sense of right and wrong
ï»żï»żBothered by mistakes and try to perfect their work
ï»żï»żStill en joy being read to even though they can read independently
ï»żï»żRapidly increasing vocabulary
ï»żï»żSome may still read out loud but most kids can read silently now
8 year-olds
ï»żï»żPlay hard and tire quickly
ï»żï»żGrowth spurts can cause them to be clumsy
ï»żï»żAd just well to change and bounce back quickty from disappointments
ï»żï»żWant peer and adult approval
ï»żï»żForm larger friend groups than 7 year-olds
ï»żï»żTend to exaggerate
ï»żï»żEnjoy responsibility but may not complete assigned tasks successfully
ï»żï»żLike adding things to school assignments but not revising previous work
ï»żï»żCan maintain attention for long periods of time but may forget instructions
9 year-olds
ï»żï»żStart of puberty (typically closer to 10 but can happen)
ï»żï»żMay twist hair or bite nails to relieve tension
ï»żï»żMore individualistic and beginning to experiment with different personalities and styles
ï»żï»żOften worried or anxious
ï»żï»żVery critical of themselves and others (including adults)
ï»żï»żLike to negotiate and make deals (this is the age I accidentally made my own pyriamid scheme)
ï»żï»żCurious but less imaginative (ike to know the how and why)
ï»żï»żRather than learning to read, school focuses on reading to learn (textbooks)
10 year-olds
ï»żï»żLower body muscles are developed but typically not upper body
ï»żï»żFrequent rest periods and snacks benefit their quickly growing bodies
ï»żï»żGenerally happy and friendly
ï»żï»żQuick to anger and to forgive
ï»żï»żAppreciate being noticed and rewarded for their efforts
ï»żï»żTypically have sloppier writing than 9 year-olds because they are in a hurry
ï»żï»żListen well and can appreciate other peoples perspectives
ï»żï»żREAD A LOT
ï»żï»żIncreasing ability to think abstractly
11 year-olds
ï»żï»żMiddle school and team sports usually begin around this time
ï»żï»żNeed lots of food and physical activity (also usually don't get enough sleep)
ï»żï»żImpulsive and often talk before thinking
ï»żï»żUse social media a lot
ï»żï»żConcerned with thier inclussion or exclusion from social groups
ï»żï»żBecome more skilled at abstract thinking and deductive reasoning
ï»żï»żLike to challenge rules and test limits as they move towards independence
ï»żï»żImitate adult language
ï»żï»żCan be sensitive and self-absorbed at times
12 year-olds
ï»żï»żAdult personality begins to emerge, but they may still try out others
ï»żï»żMore reasonable than ll year-olds
ï»żï»żCapable of self-awarness and empathy
ï»żï»żCare more about peers opinions than adults
ï»żï»żMore able to think abstractly about complex moral issues
ï»żï»żMay begin to excel at a subject or skill
ï»żï»żWant to make money from jobs at home or in their neighborhoods
13 year-olds
ï»żï»żPuberty is in full swing and hygiene becomes a big concern (acne and body odor)
ï»żï»żMales typically e jaculate for the first time before or during this time
ï»żï»żHave a Sex Ed class in school which is embarassing for them and may lead to silly or rude behavior
ï»żï»żMoody and sensitive
ï»żï»żTend to travel is small packs and become very concerned with popularity
ï»żï»żIncreasing levels of sarcasm in humor
ï»żï»żLikes and dislikes become more pronounced
ï»żï»żLike to challenge authority
ï»żï»żStruggle to put their ideas into practice (they are concerned about social justice but also are mean to each other)
14 year-olds
ï»żï»żFemales are typically fully developed physically
ï»żï»żMay become sexually active
ï»żï»żLoud and rambuntious
ï»żï»żDislike adult lectures and feel they know what will be said after the first few words
ï»żï»żBetter at figuring out cause and effect
ï»żï»żMore willing to admit error and try things a second or third time
ï»żï»żAdult personality continues to develop
I am so sick of fic writers making 10-year-olds talk like babies.
I work with children and have taken numerous classes on adolescent development. Here's some of what I learned because I might actually kill someone if I read another fic where an older child is essentially a four-year-old. (No hate to anyone in particular. Children are confusing.)
(Slight trigger warning for 13 & 14 year-olds. Puberty/sex mentioned)
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(Most info is from Chip Wood's Yardsticks: Child and Adolescent Development Ages 4-14)
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coryndoll · 3 days ago
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authors note: broken up with so i made THIS its 3am please
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is it okay to want your ex to be the person beside you when you wake up from a dream about them, even when you know you’re supposed to be moving on?
because if it’s not, then you’re already doing this all wrong.
you wake up too suddenly, almost like your own body betrayed you, forcing you out of something you weren’t ready to leave behind. your eyes snap open, heart hammering, the kind of startled wake-up that leaves you disoriented for a moment, stuck between dream and reality.
you lift your head, blinking against the dark, and look down at the sheets pooled around your waist, then slowly, like maybe you already know what you’ll find, you glance toward the other side of the bed.
empty.
your stomach sinks, but you tell yourself that’s stupid. of course it’s empty. why wouldn’t it be?
but it doesn’t matter what your head knows. it’s what your heart feels that always screws you up, because for one blissful, delirious second, you expected him to be there. warmth beside you, an arm draped across your waist, his steady breathing pulling you back under.
but that was the dream.
and god, what a cruel dream.
you don’t even know if you were just friends or something more in it, if you’d crossed back over that invisible line or if you were still dancing around it, but what you do know is how it felt. how you felt. that dizzy kind of giddiness, the way your stomach flipped with every glance, every touch, every little moment of something unspoken but understood. it felt like starting over, like all the space between you had been erased, like maybe you could still have him.
and then you woke up.
you swallow hard and let your head fall back against the pillow, eyes squeezing shut. you shouldn’t be dreaming about him. you shouldn’t be feeling like this.
you’re supposed to be getting over him.
but now it’s four in the morning, and you’re wide awake with a lingering ache in your chest, a knot in your stomach, and a dream you can’t shake no matter how much you tell yourself it doesn’t mean anything.
you try to sleep again. you roll over, adjust the blankets, close your eyes, and breathe deep like you read somewhere that might help, but it doesn’t. so you grab your phone from the nightstand and scroll through tiktok, letting the mindless flood of videos wash over you, but none of them make you laugh, none of them distract you the way you want them to. the flashes of what you remember come every now and then.
you think about making food, something small, because eating always makes you sleepy. but that feels like too much effort, and the last thing you want is to be alone with your thoughts in the kitchen, staring at the clock and counting the hours until you have to pretend like you’re fine.
so you give up and swipe through your notifications instead, clearing some out, replying to a text from your mom, letting the dull routine of it settle you.
but then you see his name, just sitting there in your recents like it belongs, like it hasn’t been haunting you since the breakup.
your thumb hesitates over the screen, and that’s all it takes. the thought is already there, already burrowing into your brain like an instinct you can’t fight.
you shouldn’t. you know you shouldn’t.
are you on non-speaking terms for now?
is it safe to send just one text?
but the dream is still fresh, still clinging to you like secondhand smoke, and every fiber of your being is screaming at you to just reach out. just once. just this one time.
before you can talk yourself out of it, before you can convince yourself to be strong, you tap his name and press the call button.
you sit up slowly, pressing your phone to your ear, and listen to the dial tone.
one ring.
two.
three.
your stomach twists. this was a mistake. he’s sleeping. maybe he has his ringer on and you’re waking him up. shame on you. you should hang up. you should—
then a noise. a shift.
your breath catches, your heart lurches.
you pull the phone away, staring at the screen, frozen in panic. maybe it was nothing. maybe he just moved in his sleep. maybe he won’t even remember this in the morning—
“hello?”
his voice is groggy, rough around the edges like he hasn’t fully woken up yet. like he doesn’t know who’s calling him at this hour.
and holy shit, you almost hang up right then. almost.
but something in you makes you lift the phone back to your ear, makes you swallow the lump in your throat, makes you whisper, “hello?”
there’s a pause, like maybe he’s still caught somewhere between sleep and reality. you hear the shift of fabric, the rustling of blankets as he moves, like he’s rolling onto his back, maybe rubbing at his face, trying to shake off the haze of sleep.
and then, recognition. “y/n— hey? why are you up?”
your lips part, but for a moment, nothing comes out.
because what are you supposed to say? that you woke up from a dream about him, and it felt so real that for half a second, you thought he’d actually been there? that it left you feeling warm and whole and painfully desperate to hold onto something that isn’t even yours anymore? that the idea of moving on feels impossible when your subconscious won’t even let you pretend you’re over it?
you swallow, forcing yourself to say something, anything, before the silence stretches too long.
“i couldn’t sleep,” you whisper, and before the guilt can settle too deep in your chest, you add, “sorry if i woke you.”
on the other end, you hear him shift again. there’s a faint rustling, the kind that makes you picture him shaking his head, before he murmurs, “you didn’t.”
you let out a small breath, a quiet scoff, something close to a laugh but not quite. “yeah?” your voice is just a little teasing, just a little skeptical. “you sound like it.”
for a second, there’s nothing. then he chuckles.
soft and low, the kind of laugh that makes your stomach twist, that makes you feel like you’ve caught him in a lie. and you have, obviously. you know his voice too well, you can hear the exhaustion in it, the roughness in his throat. you know he was asleep. but he’s trying to make you feel better about it, trying to brush it off like it doesn’t matter.
it’s nothing. it’s barely anything.
but it’s enough to make you slip.
you press your lips together, fingers tightening around your phone. because for a second, just a second, it feels normal again. like you can still call him in the middle of the night just because, like you can hear his sleepy laugh and joke about it, like you haven’t lost this part of him.
but then reality catches up.
your stomach sinks, the warmth in your chest cooling into something heavier, something bitter. your smile fades, and you shift, pressing your forehead against your knee, closing your eyes.
you shouldn’t be doing this. you shouldn’t be letting yourself fall back into something you know isn’t yours anymore.
but you force yourself to get to the point.
“would it be stupid if i asked you to come over?” you murmur, barely louder than a breath, barely brave enough to ask, but desperate enough to say it anyway.
the second the words leave your mouth, you regret them. the silence is immediate. so much silence that it makes your stomach twist, makes your pulse spike, makes you feel like you should just end the call right now and save yourself from whatever is about to happen next.
you pull your phone away for a second, checking to see if the call is even still connected.
“y/n.”
it’s soft, but the weight behind it is heavy. there’s something careful in the way he says your name, something almost hesitant, like he’s reminding you of something neither of you want to say out loud.
you know what he’s about to tell you. that there’s a reason you aren’t in each other’s beds anymore. there’s a reason you aren’t supposed to be doing this. and suddenly, panic sets in.
“nevermind,” you rush out, shaking your head at yourself like he can see you. “that was— i shouldn’t have asked. i just— i’m tired. i’m sorry i woke you, i’ll let you go. goodnight—"
“stop.” his voice is firm, cutting through your words before you can finish. you freeze, fingers curling into the fabric of your blanket, breath hitching, and you wait. you don’t say anything.
then, more shuffling on his end. you strain to listen, and then it hits you. he’s moving. getting out of bed.
“yeah,” he exhales, voice still thick with exhaustion, but steady now. certain. “i’ll be there.”
there’s a pause, the quiet hum of the phone line stretching between you both. you can still hear him moving; maybe grabbing his keys, maybe slipping on a hoodie. the thought alone makes your stomach flip. then, his voice, softer this time. careful. “do you need anything else?”
the question is simple, but there’s something about the way he asks it that makes you hesitate. like he’s offering you something more than just his presence. like if you asked for it, he’d give you anything. but you’re already pushing it. you know that.
so you shake your head, pressing your lips together before making a small sound of refusal, “mm-mm.”
on the other end, drew exhales, barely audible, and when he speaks again, it’s quiet. steady. “alright,” and then the call ends.
you lower your phone from your ear, staring at the screen as the seconds of silence stretch on, until the brightness fades and leaves you staring at your own faint reflection.
your teeth sink into your bottom lip, eyes flickering toward your dresser, but you’re not really seeing it. your mind is running too fast, thoughts spiraling, pulling you in two different directions.
there’s an uneasy feeling settling in your chest, pressing against your ribs. like maybe you shouldn’t have done this. like maybe this is exactly why you and drew shouldn’t be calling each other in the middle of the night anymore. but then, there’s something else. something warmer.
because he agreed. without hesitation too. without a single question. he’s coming over. does that mean something? the thought almost makes you smile. hope.
drew doesn’t live far, thankfully. all that space in los angeles, and yet, somehow, you both ended up just a mile or two apart. it had been convenient back then, when late-night filming ran over, when you were both too tired to do anything but collapse into each other’s arms, when going home meant a five-minute drive instead of a long trek across the city.
it made sense, being close. you’d even talked about closing the distance completely before, like moving out of your separate places and into one together. it wasn’t a serious discussion, more like a fleeting idea thrown out between shared meals and lazy mornings, but it had lingered. but you never put any real time into it. and maybe that was for the best. or maybe it wasn’t.
because if drew can come over now, without question, without hesitation, just because you asked, then what would it have been like if you had actually lived together?
you can’t stop your mind from running with the thought, from spiraling into a thousand different possibilities.
if you had shared a home, would he have stayed in your bed on nights like these, when you couldn’t sleep, when the weight of missing him pressed heavy on your chest? or would he have made himself comfortable in some extra room, always just across the hall, close enough to feel present but far enough to keep a safe distance?
if you had already built a life under the same roof, would he have been the one to move out? or would he have stayed, finding excuses to linger, to keep things from changing too much, to hold on to something that neither of you were sure how to let go of?
or would he have stayed in the same bed, too disciplined to let emotions dictate his choices, too mature to act like sharing a bed meant something more than what it was—just sleep, just comfort, just the two of you existing in the same space like you always had?
because that’s who drew is. realistic, rational, someone who believes in keeping things separate, even if it hurts.
he wouldn’t have been reckless about it. he wouldn’t have let longing turn into excuses or blurred lines. he would have figured out what to do, how to move forward, how to live in the same space while still trying to get over you. he wouldn’t have let himself slip.
but you? you don’t think you’d be able to pretend so easily. because lying next to him, feeling his presence just inches away, knowing it was him but that you weren’t his anymore. it would break you, piece by piece, every single night.
but he’s there soon, riding up the elevator like it’s nothing, like this isn’t something that should feel bigger than it is. like this isn’t something that should be happening at all. ten minutes. that’s all it takes.
when the knock comes, you practically stumble out of bed, feeling unsteady in your own body. you don’t know how to carry yourself, don’t know if you should be composed or apologetic, don’t know if you should even be doing this. but you move anyway, making your way to the door on autopilot, fingers unsteady as they reach for the handle.
when you open it, there he is. hood on, sweats hanging low on his hips, a stupid pair of sandals on his feet like he didn’t think twice about what he was wearing before leaving. like he didn’t care. but his eyes . . . his tired, knowing, impossibly soft eyes, tell you otherwise.
and you feel it then. the guilt. all over again.
it’s humiliating, the way you can’t get over him. the way your chest tightens just from seeing him stand in your doorway. the way he can read it all over your face like it’s written there in bold letters. he exhales, something quiet, something almost affectionate, and then murmurs, “c’mon, angel.”
his voice is low, thick with sleep, and it only makes you feel worse, but you let him in anyway. you step aside, and he moves past you, closing the door behind him, locking it with the ease of muscle memory. it’s dark. the lights are off, nothing illuminating the space except for the soft, golden glow bleeding through the thin curtain covering your balcony door. it’s just enough to see him, to see the way he’s watching you, the way his brows pull together when he sees the wetness brimming in your eyes.
you cover your face with your hands, disappointment settling deep in your stomach. you shouldn’t have called him. you shouldn’t have let him come. you shouldn’t be standing here, crying in front of him like you’re still his to comfort.
but then his arms are around you, wrapping around your shoulders, around your head, pulling you into his chest before you can even think to push him away.
he’s warm.
his scent, familiar, overwhelming, engulfs you instantly. and suddenly, it all feels . . . warm in here. safe. like something you shouldn’t still want. like something you don’t know how to let go of.
and soon you’re back under the sheets, and so is he.
it’s quiet. on purpose.
he sits upright against the headboard, back pressed into the pillows, the fabric of his hoodie bunching slightly where his shoulders meet the wood. you’re not sure where he’s looking, but his gaze is far away, unfocused, lost in thoughts he won’t say out loud.
you don’t try to figure them out. you don’t ask. instead, you just let yourself sink into him, pressing your cheek against his chest, feeling the steady rise and fall beneath you. his warmth seeps into your skin, into the cotton of your sleep shirt, into the spaces between each breath. it feels familiar. dangerously so.
one of your hands stays curled between your bodies, fingers pressing into your own palm like you’re trying to hold something in. the other rests lightly on his abdomen, just for a second, just enough to feel the soft give of fabric over skin. hesitation creeps in, a warning, a reminder, but you ignore it. your fingers trace a barely-there path lower, brushing against his hand.
he doesn’t pull away.
your fingertips graze his knuckles first, featherlight, and then you take his hand completely, slipping your fingers between his, linking them like muscle memory.
he squeezes.
it’s subtle, almost unconscious, but it’s there. his hand is warm, slightly calloused, the way it’s always been. the way it shouldn’t still feel so right.
he exhales slowly, and you hear it more than you see it, feel it more than you acknowledge it. but when you glance up at him, you catch the shift in his face. the slight furrow of his brows. the parting of his lips, like there’s something sitting on his tongue, something he won’t say.
his eyes are trained on nothing. somewhere in the distance. worried. like he knows this is wrong too. but he stays. neither of you move, neither of you loosen your grip.
he reaches over and turns off the bedside lamp, but nothing really changes. the silence lingers. the warmth stays. you both just lay there, tangled in something you shouldn’t be, holding onto something neither of you know how to let go of.
and maybe that just sums you two up as a whole.
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radioiaci · 1 day ago
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By the time Vox had nabbed him from where he thrashed, Alastor had already sucked in more water than was probably good for him or for his lungs. Human or demon, he was not capable of breathing underwater - and as he finally broken the surface with Vox's tugs, he gasped aloud, choking wetly on the water in his mouth and throat before he turned to cling to the other, trying to get feet beneath him to hoist himself the rest of the way out so he could breathe.
To him, the alligators that might have been lurking nearby were not nearly as terrifying as falling back into the dark water, finding whatever strength he had to pull Vox the rest of the way out of the water and to the dry grass. It was not entirely safe from predators, but it was safe from the water. And that, to him, was what mattered, kneeling there as he coughed up the muck he'd inhaled in all of his thrashing.
His turn to vomit, it seemed.
This had never happened to him - though he'd never been trying to heroically carry someone else while he was hopping along on his own when he was a child. His mistake that he allowed himself to get distracted.
If there were any lingering signs of whatever angels might have been on their tail, he was not paying attention. Nor to whatever threats remained beneath the nearby water. Too busy trying to catch his breath and bring his heartrate down as he spared a half glance towards the water and moved further away in clear fear.
"...I'm sorry," he managed to choke out after a few moments. "I didn't-"
He felt a fool. But perhaps that was better focused on later. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew they needed to keep going until they got to the car. They were likely not far now.
Vox had stayed looking behind them, still looking for more alligators. Wondering how many were lurking just out of sight. Alastor ran around this place barefoot?? How did the man die of gunshot with those things lurking.
“Not all morning.” He quickly chirped his correction over Alastor’s voice- which of course didn’t matter anyway. One because it was over and done with, two because the next second Vox’s jaw was colliding with the other man’s shoulder. And then he was pulled down by gravity until the ground punched him at an angle he didn’t expect— because it had been a hill. He couldn’t catch himself with whatever momentum was happening and then he was in water.
Thankfully it was nowhere as deep as whatever Alastor had fell into.
Downside was Vox was the only one that could swim.
“Goddamn you- you fuckingâ€”ïżœïżœïżœ he started to hiss as he sat up in the near two feet deep water, then saw his companion no where at all. But the water settling where it had swallowed him.
“You muth’rFUCKER!” He spat with more vitriol in his voice than Alastor would likely hear in the near future as he punched at the water. Pulling himself up unsteadily. He spit to the side and shoved off some kind of foliage that was stuck to his arm.
No the other was not resurfacing. Goddamn deer kept fucking drowning around him.
He meant to cuss again as he pushed his wet hair back over his head, wading out deeper- but the steep drop off was unlike any terrain he had ever come across. He barely had a second to grab a deep breath before he was under water.
Opening his eyes underwater hurt like hell and he couldn’t even see. He just vaguely swam forward- and luckily or unluckily got wacked in the chest with one of Alastor’s flailing arms.
He grabbed his wrist and gave a few short struggles backwards till he could clamber back onto the shallowish area he had landed on.
Then hauled the other closer.
There was definitely more of the same noise. The water vibrating somewhere around them. Territorial even if they weren’t hungry. And the two demons were being anything but discrete.
Vox sputtered and spat. Then briefly making a wretching noise because the smell was making his stomach ache. He pushed his wet hair back over his head again to clear his eyes and make sure Alastor surfaced.
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cutielando · 15 hours ago
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runaway bride | charles leclerc
synopsis: in which he saves you from making a mistake
a/n: based on this request!
my masterlist
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The soft music echoed through the church hall, making you let out a deep breath.
There you stood, in front of the huge double oak doors, waiting for the moment to finally walk down the aisle and marry Aiden, your boyfriend of 2 years.
After you had broken up with Charles, you didn't think you would ever find the same kind of love again. The bond that you shared with the Monegasque was something so strong and beautiful, you thought it was for life.
Then, you met Aiden.
He was sweet, kind, understanding, loving. He was an incredible guy, a guy who took care of you, who respected you and who made sure you were safe and taken care of.
However, deep into your heart, you knew the truth that nobody could ever change: he wasn't Charles.
He didn't make you feel the same things that Charles could, he didn't make you feel alive, like every fiber of your being was on fire, he wasn't as passionate and intense as Charles was.
He was just...Aiden.
But you felt comfort that you hadn't felt in a long time, which was the primary reason why you had accepted his proposal. He offered you safety, offered you comfort and stability.
You would learn how to truly love him down the line.
Or so you tried to convince yourself whenever you would get cold feet about going through with the wedding.
"Are you ready?" your father's voice suddenly pulled you back to reality, the oak doors now open, the entire hall looking at the two of you.
You smiled tightly and nodded, looping your arm through his as you slowly started walking towards the aisle.
Watching all the guests around you, a sort of guilt settled deep inside of your gut.
All these people, all of your families having gathered here today to watch you and Aiden get married, watching you supposedly seal your fate and look to a 'happy' future with him.
Not knowing that, deep inside, you knew it was anything but that.
Upon reaching the altar, your father gave you away to Aiden, who took your hand and helped you up the steps.
"You look beautiful" he whispered, his eyes twinkling.
You smiled, trying to make it look as natural as possible.
He didn't deserve this, you knew that. He deserved to be getting married to someone who truly loved him, who wanted him just as much as he wanted you.
But that person wasn't you, and it was probably very selfish of you to go through with the wedding while knowing that your heart belonged to someone else.
What choice did you have, though?
All of these people, your entire families, waiting for this day for months. Aiden, finally happy to have found his one true love.
How could you possibly ruin that?
"Ladies and gentlemen, I welcome you to the wedding of Y/N Y/LN and Aiden Becker" the bishop started, prompting the entire wedding hall to sit down and listen with eager.
You didn't hear anything else after that, your feelings all over the place as you looked anywhere but Aiden's eyes.
The church was silent, all oblivious to the internal turmoil you were having before their eyes. Your mother couldn't keep her eyes off of you, and once you had made eye contact with her, you could have sworn that she nodded slightly, a look of understanding in her eyes.
She knew, probably better than anyone, about your conflicting feelings for both Aiden and Charles. She knew how hard it was for you when you and Charles broke up, and she knew that Aiden would never measure up to the way Charles made you feel. She was your mother, after all. She knew you better than anyone.
Out of the corner of your eye, suddenly, you saw movement at the far end of the room, right by the big oak doors you had walked through mere moments before.
Your heart started beating out of your chest as you saw who it was.
Him.
He was standing there in a clad black Ferrari suit, his hands in his pockets, not moving an inch.
Your eyes widened slightly, fixated on his figure standing a mere few feet away from you. He didn't make any move to walk closer, to actually enter the church hall.
He just stood there, his eyes widening in awe as he took you in, tears slowly welling up in his eyes.
Your stomach was in shambles as you couldn't tear your eyes away from him. He was just as beautiful as you had remembered, his eyes just as kind as they used to be.
All kinds of emotions were running through you, making your head spin and your nerves go into overdrive.
Why did he do this? Why did he show up on what was supposed to be the happiest day of your life? Why did he have to show up at your wedding?
Maybe because he knew you would leave Aiden behind and run to him, you thought to yourself.
"Y/N? Is everything okay?" the priest's voice suddenly made you whip your head around.
The entire hall was staring at you, Aiden looked concerned and was looking at you with a worried expression, and nobody had seemed to have seen Charles standing right outside the doors.
"I, um, I..." you croaked, not being able to find your words.
You looked around once again, Charles' figure giving you a sad smile before he slowly began to retreat, up until he was now out of sight.
Desperately searching for a sign on what to do, your eyes gravitated towards your mother, hoping you would be able to communicate with her through your eyes.
And there she was, smiling subtly at you, her eyes sparkling as she gave you a very tiny nod.
That was all the confirmation that you had needed.
You looked back at Aiden, who had an expression like he knew exactly what was about to happen and he knew it had been a long time coming.
"I'm so sorry, Aiden" you whispered, slowly letting go of his hands before you sprinted out of the church hall, leaving behind you dozens of shocked guests.
You quickly ran out of the church, bursting through the front doors and stepping out into the warm summer day.
And then, there he was.
Leaning against his car right in front of the church, his hands crossed against his chest.
And he was smiling.
For a little while, neither of you knew what to say. You had just left your future husband at the altar for him, and he had just shown up at his ex-girlfriend's wedding.
What could a person even say in this situation?
"What are you doing here?" that was the best you could muster up, your voice not louder than a soft whisper.
Charles could only imagine how you must be feeling.
Years after you guys broke up, on the happiest day of your new life, he decides to show up. He knew it was going to be a very long shot, and he was aware that it was extremely rude of him to be showing up at your wedding.
But he couldn't help himself.
He couldn't bear the thought of ever seeing you married to someone else, someone who wasn't him.
Just like he couldn't bear not being with you any longer.
"I couldn't let you go through with the wedding" he said, his expression now somber.
He knew he was already pushing his luck, but he had already ruined your wedding. What more harm could he do?
Dozens of emotions were cursing through your veins, some of which you couldn't even identify.
Hurt? Anger? Disbelief? Disappointment in yourself? Longing for what you once had with Charles? Guilt over a thrown-away future with a great man?
But even in the midst of all the confusing emotions, there was one that stood out between the sea of doubt, clear like a new day.
Your unwavering love for Charles.
A feeling that has not changed from the beginning.
"Why now?" you whispered, your shoulders sagging in defeat.
There was no point in trying to act like you weren't so glad to see him, like your heart wasn't beating out of your chest as you stood in front of him, like you weren't dying to be in his arms after such a long time.
Charles sighed and pushed himself off the car, taking a few steps closer to you until he was almost chest-to-chest with you.
Your breath hitched as you felt the warmth of his body against yours for the first time in years. You had missed it so much, so much more than you had ever admitted to yourself.
"I've spent the past couple of years kicking myself for making the mistake of pushing you away from me. I've never forgiven myself for the way our relationship ended, and I don't think I'll ever be able to put into words just how sorry I am. The moment I found out you were marrying someone else, I couldn't not do anything. I know I sound selfish, and I know it's not fair of me to barge in like this, but if there was even a tiny chance that you might still feel the same way about me, I had to take it" he said, and as you stared into his eyes, you couldn't see even a sign of dishonesty.
He was being real, he was being brutally honest, probably more honest than he had ever been with you before.
And he was completely right, which was probably the worst thing about the whole situation. He was right, you did still love him just as deeply as you had before. And deep down, you probably had hoped that he would show up and save you from making a mistake by marrying Aiden.
"You've always had a flair for the dramatic, you know" you said, hoping the joke would lighten up the atmosphere.
Charles chuckled, nodding his head. He looked up at you again, his eyes sparkling with a sliver of hope.
"Do you want to go somewhere quiet and talk about this?" he asked, a deeper, hidden meaning planted behind his words.
You drew in a breath, but didn't feel any pain or heaviness in your chest. All you felt was peace, peace and love for the man standing right before you.
"Yeah, I'd like that" you said, smiling before giving him your hand, which he gladly took.
And that's how you found yourself sitting in the passenger seat of his Ferrari, his hand tightly holding onto yours, driving away from the church and ceremony that was supposed to change your life.
But why change it when you had everything you had ever wanted for, right in this car?
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pandora-writes-one-piece · 3 days ago
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The Meet-Cute - Zoro's Story - 9
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Source for pic
Trouble 9
Word Count: 5471
Tags For The Whole Story: Fem!Reader; Protective!Zoro; Soft!Zoro; Sexual Tension; Teasing; Flirting; Mature Audiences (I'll always tag the NSFW chapters); Modern Day AU; Reader is being stalked; Fear; Paranoia; Angst; Rom-Com Vibes; Mild Gore-like Descriptions; Blood; Reader in a terror-like state; Dead Animals Mentioned; Fluff; Romance; Banter; Manipulation; Miscommunication; Frustration; Reader is very clumsy;
Special Warning: English is not my first language, I apologise for any possible spelling or grammar mistakes.
Summary: After moving away from the hustle and bustle of Grand Line City to help your father around the property following a horse-riding accident - and in the hopes of healing your broken heart after your asshole ex-fiancé cheated - you settle into the country calmness of the Calm Belt. You and Zoro are slowly returning to your easy friendship filled with banter and flirting and you actually begin to glimpse a future with the green-haired cop. But then you start to receive weird gifts. They quickly escalate to manipulative texts. And now you're stuck in a spiral of terror and there's no way to get help because the Stalker, whoever he is, is threatening something other than just your life.
Notes: I've left very ominous comments in the last chapter, saying something big would happen in chapter 9... I didn't get to write the part I wanted, but I still think some big stuff happens in this chapter... I'll let you all be the judges of that! So tell me all about it, will you?
Masterlist
BANG, BANG, BANG! 
Your hands cover your ears, but not even that can keep out the deafening sound of the incessant pounding on the front door. 
Desperate sobs make your shoulders shake as tears flow freely down your already tear-streaked cheeks. 
You're so tired. 
“Make it stop
 please, please, make it stop.” You whisper, pleading with whichever deity is willing to listen because you've run out of options. 
“Come on, Trouble! I know you're in there!” Zoro? “If you don't open this fucking door, I swear I will break it down!”
The relief that washes over you is immediate and dizzying. It's Zoro. It's not your stalker. It's Zoro! 
Bzzzz.
Unknown: Don’t open, Kitten.
Ignoring the text, you get up swiftly and if you thought relief might stop the tears, it's the exact opposite. You're crying even harder. For a split second your fingers tremble against the doorknob, weighing your options. There's a little voice in the back of your head telling you that Zoro will get hurt because of you, that you'll regret it, but another shout from Zoro keeps your thoughts from spiraling further. 
“Trouble!”
Bzzzz.
Unknown: If you tell him anything about our little secret, I WILL hurt him.
“I'm going to count to three!” Zoro shouts.
Yet he doesn't even get to one. You need to see him. Unlocking all the bolts with shaky fingers, you swing the door open almost all the way, your hand flying to your mouth as you try to stifle a sob. 
“Fucking finally! I've been texting all day, trying to call. I only just got out of work because every time I was about to leave, there seemed to–” Zoro pauses his angry tirade, his eye scanning you from top to bottom, taking in your heaving shoulders, your wet and puffy face, the bags beneath your eyes, and most likely the way your clothes hang looser from lack of sustenance and stress. “The fuck?”
You can't speak. He's all you can think of. A beacon of light, a safety net tethering you back when you were lost in a spiral of fear. 
“Zo
”
He reaches but pulls back instantly, his head cocking to the side as he assesses you. You avoided his touch like the plague last weekend, hell, you've been avoiding him all week. 
You've avoided him for a lifetime, it seems. 
Like a spring, you jump forward, your arms instantly wrapping around his broad torso, and his scent hits you like a truck. He's home. He's safety. He's everything. 
“Hey, hey, it's okay. Whatever it is, Trouble, I'll take care of it, okay?” When his strong arms envelop you in warmth, you bury your face against his shirt, not caring one bit if you're about to leave snot, drool, and tears all over it. You need to be closer. You need to feel safer. “Did something happen to Shanks?”
You shake your head. Thank God your father is away. If he saw you like this, he would break. Though maybe if your dad were home, you wouldn't even have a stalker
 
Zoro's hand tangles in your hair, settling against your nape as he cradles you closer to him, and you can't stop the tears. You're crying for all you've suffered, for all you've endured, and for what's sure to happen because you're in Zoro's arms, and there’s no way your stalker is going to let you get away with this. 
But just for a bit, just a little bit, you need to revel in him. 
“Then let's talk inside.” Zoro whispers your name, trying to coax you away from him long enough to enter and close the door, but you still cling to him, as if letting go means going back to the nightmare you've been living in. “Hey, I just want to close the door, okay? I'm not leaving.”
He's not leaving? 
You want to tell him to go, that he can't stay with you, that you'll only bring him suffering. Who knows what your stalker is capable of? You can't risk Zoro, you just can't! Before you can stop it, images of Lucci’s face without eyes and the clerk without hands swim in your vision, and you wince. 
But you don't protest. 
You only cling harder. 
Zoro sighs and drags you inside the house, never letting go of you. After closing the door he guides you to the couch probably meaning to sit next to you, but you hold him so tight that he pulls you to his lap. Your legs to the side and arms still wrapped tightly around him. You sense as he lays a soft kiss on the top of your head and then leans his chin where his lips had been. Zoro's hand still runs soothing circles on your back and it's unlikely your sobs are going to slow down anytime soon. 
“You're all right, Trouble. I'm here. I'll never let anything happen to you.”
You're so exhausted and drained that you barely realise you're falling asleep. Until darkness claims you. 
-*-
To say that Zoro's mad is an understatement. He's more than mad, he's furious. 
At first, he was mad at you. For a lot of things, actually. Avoiding him, ghosting him, pretending that what you had - or what was starting to develop - meant nothing to you. But mostly, he was mad at the way you kept ignoring all his calls and texts. That was driving him insane. 
But now
 
Now, he's fucking seething. 
He's going to find out what - or who - has left you in this state, and he's going to make it right. Because there's no way you look like this just because you're tired or because you miss your dad. 
Fucking bullshit. 
You look like a ghost. A starving ghost at that. 
A heavy sigh parts his lips as he runs a hand down his face. One fucking thing at a time. You need to eat. 
After you rest. 
Your breathing evens out after a while, but the way you're clinging to him makes him wait a while longer before moving you. He makes sure you're comfortable on the couch before putting a blanket over you. 
His chest aches at the way your breath hitches as you inhale. Your brows furrow, and your fingers now grasp the blanket instead of his shirt. 
He's seen enough shit in his profession to realise the telltale signs. And it's pretty fucking clear that you're scared of something. 
He's going to find out what. 
As he turns to go to the kitchen and prepare some food for you - even if he has to force-feed you - his eye falls on the garish bouquet of fresh roses on the table. 
“Fuck.” 
Didn't you say the gifts had stopped? He remembers that clearly. Could the flowers be from someone else? 
Zoro approaches and inspects the roses with an analytical eye. They're ordinary. And there's no card. 
No fucking clue. 
Mumbling another string of curses, Zoro rummages around your cabinets, and the action only makes him madder. The bread is stale and mouldy, the vegetables and fruit are withered, and the opened milk in the fridge has gone sour. It looks like you haven’t gone shopping or had a decent meal in days.
Zoro finds an unopened bottle of milk that’s still good and some cereal, so that will have to do for now. He’ll force it down your throat when you wake up, even if you protest. One quick look around the house makes him realise you have all the windows and doors bolted and the curtains drawn. 
He wouldn't find that suspicious any other time, after all, you’re all alone inside a big house. But considering you’re scared witless, this looks mighty suspicious. 
He returns to the living room, giving the bouquet of roses the stink-eye, and sits on the couch next to you. His keen eye not missing the way you shiver slightly, even though he’s covered you with a blanket, or the way your lower lip trembles with each breath. 
Then, his eye falls on the small end table, where your phone rests.
Zoro’s hand twitches, and he lets out a low grunt. That damn phone. You didn’t part with it at Robin’s, and every time you looked at it, you only got more distressed. Should he
?
No, he can’t. It’s your privacy, he can’t intrude. All he can do is be there for you and–
“Fuck it.” Zoro’s hand reaches for the phone as a small whimper escapes your lips. You can be mad at him all you want later. For now, he needs to understand what the hell is making you look like a ghost of yourself. And especially what’s making you push him away.
He takes a deep breath and swipes the screen.
It’s locked. 
Fuck.
Maybe this is a sign that he shouldn’t be doing this? Except, he believes in signs as much as he believes in coincidences. 
He doesn’t.
So, with slow movements, Zoro grabs your hand and places your index finger over the phone. The breath he releases when the phone unlocks is slow and relieved. It feels like he’s about to figure out the reason you’re acting so weird. 
And everything you’re hiding from him. 
His eyes scan up and down as he searches for any suspicious texts. Sure enough, there are his texts and missed calls. You didn’t even read them.
And then

Nothing.
Absolutely nothing out of the ordinary.
What the fuck?
-*-
You blink slowly, adjusting to the brightness of the morning, and feel strangely well-rested. It doesn’t take you long to understand why. What hits you first is his strong scent, something you’ve come to associate with safety, and then you realise you’re hugging him.
“Morning, Trouble.” Zoro’s voice is husky, he was probably sleeping too. You blush involuntarily, realising this is what he sounds like in the morning and not minding one bit the thought of waking to this sound every day for the rest of your life.
“Hi. You stayed
”
“Of course I did. Sleep well?” 
Yeah you did. You slept like you haven’t in what feels like forever. The stalker threat is still there, you feel it taunting you in the back of your mind, like an ever-growing presence, but Zoro’s mere presence manages to keep it at bay. 
“I did.”
“Good.” He’s still holding you tight, and you don't make any move to let go either. “I was sleeping on the other couch, when you started to whimper and tremble. I didn’t want you to wake up because it looked like you needed the rest, and you seemed to calm down when I touched you, so
”
He leaves the rest unsaid, and you hold him tighter. God, you really needed him. 
After a while of silence, Zoro starts to shift, so you sit up as well, stretching. 
“You don’t have anything to eat, Trouble. Why haven’t you gone grocery shopping?”
Shit. “Oh, I’ve been postponing it. There’s so much to do around the farm.” Lies, lies, lies. “And there are always eggs from the chickens, I’ll never starve.”
“The food you have has gone bad, or nearly bad. Have you been eating?” Zoro’s eye pierces yours and you pass a hand through your hair to smooth your “bed hair”, as well as to try and deflect his inquiry. 
“I ate a lot of takeout this week. Didn’t really feel like cooking, I’ve just been so tired.” It’s mostly true

“You told me the gifts stopped.”
Fuck.
“What is this, Zoro? Am I under questioning? Should you take me to the station for this?” You get up with a huff, knowing he’s inching towards the truth fast. 
“I don’t know, should I?” He also gets up, his face turning into a frown. “You look like shit.”
“Gee, thanks!”
“You haven’t eaten.”
“Yes, I have!”
“You’re scared shitless.”
Your hands shoot to your hips, and you stamp your feet. “I am–”
“Stop deflecting! Don’t lie to me, damn it! I thought we were friends!” Zoro sighs, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “Don’t shut me out.” 
He stares intently at you, his hand reaching to touch you, and you sigh. Of course, he knows something is up. Averting his gaze, you turn and start walking away because you know that if you stay, you’ll tell him everything. And you can’t do that. You already risked a lot just by letting him spend the night. “I really need to use the bathroom now. We’ll talk later.”
He doesn’t stop you, but you still hear his muffled imprecations, and even though you don’t look him in the eye as you grab your phone, you sense him tracing your every move. 
-*-
“Eat.” You took a while in the bathroom, and even though you entered looking more like yourself, you now look scared and pale again. The texts flooded your phone as soon as you closed the bathroom door.
Unknown: Naughty, naughty, naughty. The whole night with the cop? After I warned you? Unknown: Oh, Kitten, you have no idea how absolutely mad I am right now. His arms around what is mine?  Unknown: I told you I didn’t want to hurt the cop, but I don’t think I have another choice now. Unknown: I thought you were going to behave. You’ll need to be punished. 
It kept buzzing, but you didn’t dare to read any more. The more you read his threats, the more scared you would look. And you can’t let Zoro know what’s going on. Not when his safety is at stake.
“I’m not hungry.” You say as you shove the cereal bowl Zoro placed in front of you as soon as you left the bathroom. 
“Eat, Trouble, or I swear I will force it down your throat.” He growls as his hand bangs the table. When you flinch slightly, he sighs and leans back in his chair. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be hard on you. It’s just
”
Zoro gets up from the seat in front of you, rounds the table, and kneels next to you, touching your legs so you turn to him. As you look at his expression, you feel your heart shattering into tiny pieces. He seems so lost.
“I can’t do this anymore. I see you struggling, I can see you’re scared! You’re not yourself. And the fact that you don’t let me in
 Trouble
” He places both hands on your legs, his face inches from yours, and you don’t want to pull back. “I won’t let anything or anyone hurt you, you know that, don’t you?”
You nod slowly. It would be so easy to tell him everything. He’s right, he wouldn’t let anything happen to you, you know that. “But what about you?” Your voice sounds small, almost as if you speak in a low volume your stalker won’t be able to listen.
“What about me?” Your hands raise on their own as you cup his face, your thumb tracing lazy patterns on his cheeks as your heart thumps incessantly against your chest. 
“Who’ll protect you, Zo?”
Zoro’s eyebrow raises, and he tilts his head slightly, as if struggling to understand your question. Then he smirks, that mischievous smirk that makes your stomach flutter, and places his hands on top of yours, squeezing tight. 
“I don’t need protection, Trouble.”
How you want to believe him. It would be so simple: someone’s stalking me; I’m being watched; I’m scared.
Any of those sentences could work. Zoro would go full protective mode and never leave you alone. You can do this. You can.
He’s right. He’s strong, and he’s a cop. He doesn’t need protection. He’s Roronoa Zoro.
“I–” But, obviously, it can’t be this simple. As soon as you open your mouth, your phone buzzes and buzzes and buzzes again. 
You know it’s him. So you instantly tremble and before you get the chance to grab the phone, Zoro’s hand shoots to your pocket and he fishes it out. Your knees weaken as you gasp.
He’s going to find out everything.
Zoro’s eye falls on the screen of the buzzing phone, and his eyebrow raises again.
Then he sighs and passes you the phone. “Your dad is calling. You should pick it up.”
Zoro gets up as you pick up the phone, not exactly knowing if you should feel relieved, or upset that it wasn’t your stalker. “Hey, Dad!” You try to sound cheerful, but it’s so, so hard. Especially when Zoro’s leaning against the kitchen counter, legs and arms crossed and a scowl on his lips, like he was expecting to see something else on your phone.
“Hi, Bug! What's up?”
You chuckle slightly. “What do you mean? You called. What’s the news?” God, you miss your father.
“I called? No! You called me, Bug.” He chuckles as if you’re spewing nonsense. You’re about to contest because you were in the middle of an important conversation when he called, but then you bite your tongue as your eyes widen in realisation. 
This was the stalker’s doing.
Somehow he orchestrated this call just to interrupt your moment with Zoro. This realisation makes your blood turn cold. What else is he manipulating in your life?
What else can he do?
“When are you coming home, Dad?” You can’t disguise the anxiousness in your voice, and Zoro immediately picks it up. He straightens and starts walking towards you again. 
“Oh, I’m not sure, Bug. I had the trip arranged for Monday, but the business is still going really well! I’m not sure how this is happening, but the fair is already over, and we’re still having meetings with buyers!” 
Is this being orchestrated, too? Just to keep Shanks away? Just so you’re alone?
Your heart thumps harder and harder against your chest as the feeling of being trapped returns tenfold. 
“That’s good.” Your voice is small and timid. All you want to do is tell your dad to rush home. You need this nightmare to be over. But then again, is Shanks being home really going to stop whatever the stalker has planned for you?
You highly doubt it. It will probably just endanger your dad. 
“Got to go, honey. Thank you for calling, I’ll let you know when I’ll be heading home soon, okay?” You mumble in agreement. You didn’t call. And you doubt he’s going to come home any time soon. 
You finish the call, and though Zoro looks like he has a lot more to say, he just tells you to eat, and this time you do. This call was a veiled warning. No talking to Zoro about the stalker. 
No one is safe.
-*-
Zoro doesn’t leave, but you shut down again. He helps you with the chores, and you can see him struggling to hold his tongue back. It’s like he decided to change his approach from outright interrogating you to giving you time and space so you can talk to him when you feel ready to.
Though you know Zoro is not a patient man, so who knows how long this is going to last.
Besides, even though you wish for nothing more than to tell him all that’s going on, are you willing to risk it? With not only Zoro’s safety on the line but clearly your dad’s too?
Your phone keeps buzzing in your pocket, and it takes a bathroom break for you to read the disturbing texts.
Unknown: Don’t you think he’s overstaying his welcome? Unknown: Kitten, things will go very, very wrong if you keep indulging him. Unknown: Tell him to go home, or I’ll make him go. And you won’t like it.  Unknown: I’m losing patience with you. Don’t test me. You KNOW what I’m capable of.
“Zoro.” You’ve finished your morning chores, and Zoro is washing his hands in the kitchen sink. Your heart feels heavy, and you don’t want to do this. “You can go now. I’m going to rest a bit more, maybe do some reading
”
“I’m not leaving.” He simply states. “Nami’s birthday party is later, or have you forgotten? What’s the point in leaving when we’ll just have to meet later? I’ll stick around and help.” He scoffs as he cleans his hands on the dish towel. “I really want to see what excuse you’re going to use next instead of the ‘I’m tired’ one, since I’ve been helping you all day.”
Shit. He really wants to get to the bottom of this, doesn’t he?
Bzzzz. Bzzzz. 
“Nami’s birthday party! Damn it.” It’s a good thing you had already ordered Nami’s gift about a month ago because you didn’t even remember the party was today. Heck, you still haven’t said anything to her, maybe you should call? “We’ll meet there, Zo. There’s no need to stay here.”
“You’re pushing me away again.” He says bluntly, an annoyed expression on his face, and takes a step towards you as if to prove his point. 
You take a step back, shaking your head and hitting the kitchen chair as you do so. With a curse, you keep shaking your head.
Bzzzz. 
“I’m not.”
“Bullshit.” Zoro steps forward again, closing the distance. “I’ve tried asking, I’ve tried to give you time. I’m all out of options, Trouble. I thought you trusted me. What’s going on?” Though his voice is gruff and rough, you can perceive the worry hidden underneath. 
You shake your head again, your steps taking you away from him until you hit the counter and stop. “Nothing’s going on. I keep telling you that.”
“Bullshit.” Another step and he’s right in front of you. “Let me in.” He sounds softer now, and you almost crumble. Your fingers twitch as you struggle to keep your hands pressed against your thighs, when all you want to do is hug him. 
“Zo
”
“Just tell me! Whatever it is, I can help you. You don’t have to do this alone.”
Bzzzz. Bzzzz.
Your hand reaches for your pocket instinctively, but this time, it’s not your phone that’s buzzing.
“Fuck!” Zoro sighs and steps back, reaching for his phone. His brow arches when he sees the caller ID, and he picks up the call. “Cap?”
You can hear the gravelly voice of Captain Mihawk on the other side of the line, but you can’t make out the words he’s saying. 
“A bomb threat? What?” Zoro tenses, his muscles clenching as his eye searches yours, and you can see him struggling. “Yes, I’m busy, damn it.” He sighs again, running a hand through his unkempt hair. “I’m on my way.”
Then, he turns off the call. “Grab a bag, you’re coming with me.”
A gasp stays lodged in your throat. Bzzzz. Bzzzz. Bzzzz. “What?”
“I’m not going to leave you here alone when you’re clearly scared, even though you don’t want to tell me what it is. You can stay in the car, or I’ll drop you at Nami’s. Come on.”
Bzzzz. Bzzzz. “No.”
Zoro’s face turns away from his cell phone just to stare into your eyes. “Trouble?”
“I’m fine.” You’re not. But you don’t think the bomb threat is a coincidence, and you’re scared that if Zoro takes you away from this house, he will hurt him. And you can’t have that.
“It was not a question. Let’s go.” Although his tone brooks no argument, you can’t heed him. 
“Zoro, you can’t tell me what to do.” Your voice nearly trembles, and you will all your power to stay strong. “We’ll meet later.”
Zoro’s phone buzzes again and he curses at whatever he reads on the screen. “Trouble, come on.” He extends his hand your way and you cross your arms, because all you want to do is take it and never let go. But your phone buzzes once more. 
“We’ll meet later.” You’re supposed to sound assertive, but you just sound afraid.
Zoro takes another step forward, his hand trembling slightly in the air as he waits for you to accept it. He looks at you in disbelief, almost trying to break your will with his look alone.
And damn it, if it isn’t working.
Just take his hand, ask for his help
 it would be so easy. Let go

Bzzzz. Bzzzz. Bzzzz.
“What?” Zoro answers his phone with an angry growl, and this time you can make out the words Captain Mihawk utters, as they are also angry ones.
“Get your ass in the car and onto the site, Officer Roronoa, now. This is your first and last,verbal warning.”
Zoro turns off the phone as his jaw clenches and unclenches. He strides into the living room, grabbing his jacket and car keys, and then he strides back to you again. “You get dressed and go to Nami. I don’t want you all alone, okay?”
You nod, not wanting to commit verbally to something you already know you’re not going to follow. 
“Trouble
” He sounds so exasperated that your heart constricts further, so you take a step forward, grasping his hand in yours and holding his gaze, completely ignoring the warnings from the buzzing of your phone. 
“I’ll be fine, Zo. We’ll meet later.”
Zoro groans as his phone starts to buzz again, then, without any kind of warning, his hand grips your nape, fingers tangling with strands of your hair, and he pulls you into an unexpected kiss. 
It’s sudden, desperate, and all-consuming. He grunts and you groan, and for a few seconds all you can think about is how perfect his mouth fits against yours.
And then it’s over. 
“Later then.” He says with a raspy voice as he rushes out the door. You’re still feeling light-headed from the abrupt kiss when another buzz rattles your nerves. 
Unknown: If you thought I was mad before, Kitten, you have no idea how furious I am right now. Unknown: You WILL be punished.
-*-
You spend most of the day in a haze of terror. You know it was him who made that bomb threat. So, if he did that, what is he really capable of? He hurt Lucci and the clerk boy, and they meant nothing. What will he do to Zoro?
You don’t even consider your punishment to be anything other than that. That’s where he’ll hurt you most: through Zoro, and you bet he knows it.
After you received the text saying you’d be punished, your phone stayed eerily silent again. 
You take that opportunity to change phones for an older one you still keep around. It’s just an older version, slower, but it still works perfectly.
Even if it only stops the creepy texts, it’s already something. 
You need to find a way to stop him. And the more you think about it, the more you come to the conclusion that you need Zoro’s help. You can’t keep pushing him away. Maybe, if Zoro tells Captain Mihawk of what’s going on, he’ll be safe. 
There’s nothing safer than police protection, right?
So, you’ve made up your mind. You will say something to Zoro, even if it's in writing. You’re done cowering in fear, it’s time to stand up.
-*-
You go to Nami’s early, and you think that changing phones is working because you left the house and no text came through. Your chest feels lighter, and you can even breathe better. Zoro texted a while ago to check in on you, saying he’s fine, but the case is a mess and that he’ll explain later. 
You can’t help but feel like there’s a light at the end of the tunnel, and you’ll finally be free. You just know it. 
“You look better, sweetie!” Nami exclaims after a while. You’ve been smiling, joking, trying to be cheery. It’s her birthday, and you don’t want to be a bummer. The unease in your stomach is still making you queasy, but your terror will soon be over. You know it.
“Zoro kissed me.” You blurt out with a small chuckle, wanting to share a piece of happiness with your friend, almost as if it were meant to restore a sense of normalcy. Then, you sigh and tremble slightly. The stalker texts are still haunting you, even though you decided to fight him. 
“Finally!” Nami exclaims with a laugh. “The pining was getting pathetic.” She hugs you and pats your head. “I’m happy for both of you, I really am!”
It takes another hour before Vivi meets you both at Nami’s house, and you all leave for the restaurant to meet your friends. Then, it takes another fifteen minutes of lively chat inside the car before you reach the location. 
It’s not until you set foot in the restaurant that your phone buzzes. 
You reach for it with a small smile on your lips, thinking it’s Zoro. 
It’s not.
Unknown: You think you can get rid of me just by changing phones, Kitten? You’re really going all out, aren’t you? Playing with your fate
 with the cop’s fate
 Unknown: It’s okay, Princess. You’ll learn. I’ll make sure of it.  Unknown: You’ll soon find out where you stand and what you get from defying me.
-*-
Zoro calls Nami, saying he won’t make it to dinner, but he’ll meet you all at the club. When she asks if everything’s alright, he assures her it is. They just got delayed. So, after making sure he’s fine, Nami says he’ll have to cover the drinks tab at the bar to make up for missing dinner. 
Zoro ends the call without answering, and the smile that curves your lips is a bit strained now. The longer Zoro’s away from you, the more your resolve falters. You need him near you, that’s the only way for you to be strong. 
You spend dinner in a dichotomy of feelings. You either feel happy and excited to be with your friends or uneasy and stressed because Zoro is still away, and the stalker’s threats loom over your head. 
Even though you haven’t received any more texts after the last one, you can’t help the ominous feeling that he’s letting you enjoy a night of normalcy before he follows through with his threats.
When you all reach the club, your anxiety is through the roof.
The club is packed full, and music reverberates around you so loudly that it makes your chest thump and your ears ring. But Nami seems happy, and it’s her night. The group has a VIP table reserved for Nami’s party because Nami knows everyone, but you doubt the crew will spend much time there. The girls flock to the dance floor, Sanji follows with a silly grin and you offer to go get drinks from the bar for the remaining friends.
Zoro texted ten minutes ago, saying he’s on his way, and you’ve been rehearsing how you’re going to tell him. The music is so loud in here that you’re pretty sure you can talk to him without anyone hearing you. 
This is it. The nightmare is ending. You can wait a few more minutes. You’ve got this.
Reaching the bar with a small smile, you flag the bartender and order an array of drinks for you and your friends. The bar is completely packed, and the music is louder than at the booth you’re all in.
Still, you sense it.
It’s a prickle on your nape. A feeling of being watched creeps over you, and the little hairs on your neck stand up.
You’re still inhaling sharply, your senses on high alert, when you feel him.
He presses against your back, squeezing your front against the counter. His massive form dwarfs your figure as his arm wraps around your own, trapping it against your waist. A huge hand holds your wrist with such force that the bracelet you’re wearing bites into your skin, making you whimper. 
You want to scream, but his other hand wraps around your neck. He doesn’t squeeze, he doesn’t need to. The simple gesture is enough to exert his power over you and silence your voice. 
He’s massive. Bulky. Strong.
His hand grips your wrist tighter, and you close your eyes, already feeling tears pricking them. Then, his lips hover over your exposed neck, and he breathes against your ear. A low growl makes his chest vibrate against your back and you stifle a sob.
“Hmm
 Kitten. You’ve been such a bad girl.” His coarse goatee hairs rasp your skin, as his voice rings low and velvety smooth. Somehow, it sounds oddly familiar, though you can’t quite place it. 
Your limbs lock as your breath leaves your lungs in heavy gasps. Terror has you frozen in place. You can’t scream, can’t flag anyone to help you. You’re completely at his mercy.
“And you know what happens to bad girls?” His hand grips your wrist tighter, and you know it will bruise. “They get punished.”
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bonnie-the-butcher · 2 days ago
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Rip Tide | Chapter IV
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[ MDNI ] [ word count: 7.914 ] [ Masterlist ] 𝐂𝐹𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐱𝐧𝐬: Canonverse/Canon-Divergent; Dark! Content; NSFW; Strong Language; Cheating; Drug Use; Mentions of overdose; Some shades of Munchausen syndrome from dear old Rafe; Manipulation; Toxic, obsessive behaviour; Stalking; Violence; DUBCON/NONCON; My writing is really pretentious and English is not my first language, so please feel free to call me out in whichever grammar mistakes you might find find.
đ’đźđŠđŠđšđ«đČ | You and JJ have always been in each other's orbit. He's your brother’s best friend, the guy you've known your entire life. He was kind, protective, familiar. You never meant for the two of you to start hooking up. And you never meant for it to last so long. But when this boy you thought you'd come to know like the back of your hand turns out to be no better than the men he'd warned you about, you find yourself in the sights of the guy he hates most, regardless of wether you want that or not.
I was feeling angsty when I wrote this y'all, so please forgive me for what you’re about to read. Likes, asks, reblogs, and comments are always greatly appreciated! Thank you in advance for reading <3
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You stumble, back hitting the door with a thud. You can’t move. You can’t breathe. You can’t look away. The door handle digs into your hip as JJ cages you in. – What’s your problem, JJ?! Let go of me already!
His grip tightens, pulling you even closer, and you can hear the venom in his voice when he spits out his reply. – No! I’m not! I’m not gonna let go of you! You know why?!
– I’m on the edge of my seat, here!
He scoffs at your mocking, that bitter laugh falling from his lips like poison, his nails digging into your flesh. – I’ve been sitting here all night waiting for you to get back. I tried to be patient with you. I tried to give you space, but you don’t respond to me being nice, do you?! You don’t even acknowledge me! I bet you’re getting a real kick out of this, aren’t you?!
– Oh, yeah. Loving it. This is exactly how I wanted to spend my night. Getting shoved against a door while you channel your anger.
– DON’T— He stops himself short, watching his tone. – Don’t fucking play around with me right now, okay?! Don’t do this.
– What, then?! What the fuck do you want me to do?! You don’t want me walking away, you don’t want me talking, what do you want from me?!
– I want you to listen!
– To what?! To your little lecture on why I should’ve been nicer to my brother after the way he treated me?! After he called me pathetic?! After he took my own phone from my hand?!
– He was trying to protect you!
– Protect me?! From going out?! From having fun with my best friend?! I’ve known Barry since I was a kid! I can handle him.
JJ shoots backwards, dragging his hands through his hair as if he was going insane. – HE’S TRYING TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU!
– Advantage of what, JJ?! My overwhelming wealth?! My deep connections in high society?! I don’t even buy his drugs—unlike you!
– Don’t! – He raises his finger, stepping forward again. It’s like having a whirlwind moving through your room, he can’t just leave things how they are.
– Don’t what? Don’t point out the truth? You and John B can buy drugs, get arrested, blow all your money on some half-baked Pogue adventure, but I can’t even hang out with the guy that’s been my best friend since I was twelve?!
– No! No, you can’t, not when Rafe Cameron is involved!
– Oh, so Rafe is the problem, huh? If Barry had showed up here alone, you and John would’ve just given me a cheerful send-off? Maybe packed me a lunch for the road?
– Don’t do this right now.
– OH MY GOD, JJ! What can I fucking do?! I can’t do anything! Am I supposed to sit here in silence like some nun while you accuse me of every stupid shit that goes through your mind?! Listening to you lie your fucking face off?! And I can’t even defend myself?! What’s your fucking problem?!
– You are my problem! You are! – It’s infuriating, having to whisper to one another when you’re so angry, because JJ couldn’t wait thirty minutes for the nerves to die down. But he makes it up to you by grabbing at you, the tips of his fingers pressed so tight against your skin that you can feel the bruises forming. – I’ve thought about you all day! You’re gonna listen to me now!
You stare at him, heart hammering, pulse like static in your ears. It’s not the words that get you—it’s the way he says them, voice fraying at the edges like he’s barely holding himself together. Like he’s already lost, and he knows it.
You wrench against his hold, nails biting into his forearms, but it only makes him squeeze tighter. His eyes are burning—wild, desperate.
– You’re gonna listen to me now, – He repeats, voice low but shaking with barely contained rage. – I don’t give a shit what you think you can handle. I don’t care if Barry was your best fucking friend since birth—he’s bad news. And you know it.
– Right. Because you’re such a great judge of character!
JJ scoffs, shaking his head like he can’t believe you. Like you’re the one being unreasonable. – At least I know better than to run off with people who are just looking to use me.
You let out a groan.
This is exhausting, draining. Your head pounds and your chest feels heavy. You don’t even know where this conversation is going. – News flash, JJ, I’m not a fucking asset! There’s NOTHING to use me for!
His jaw clenches, and his hands are trembling now, even as he holds you in place. – You don’t get it, do you?! – His voice is quieter this time, rougher. – It’s not about what you have! It’s about what he can take. About what he can do to you!
Something in his face stops you—just for a second.
It’s not just anger. It’s something else. Something raw, something afraid.
You swallow hard, pushing past the sting in your throat. – And what, you think you get to decide that for me? You think you can just hold me here and—what? Teach me a lesson? Are you gonna bend me over your knee or some shit?!
JJ exhales sharply, dragging a hand down his face before gripping your jaw, tilting your chin up just enough to force your eyes on his. – I don’t want to teach you shit, I just want you to stop acting like this is a fucking game!
– I’m not—
– You are! – He growls. – You’re acting like this is just some little rebellion. Like it’s just about proving a point to your brother. And I get it, okay?! I do! I don’t like the way John B treats you either, but this vendetta, this shit you’re trying to do, isn’t okay! It’s not, alright? It’s not. You don’t know how Rafe is! You don’t see the way Barry looks at you!
His words sink into you like a stone.
– And how does he look at me, JJ? Huh?! The way you look at me, or the way you look at Kie?!
His breath catches, just for a second, but it’s enough. Enough to make something in your chest twist painfully. Because you already know the answer.
You want to hit yourself.
You want to dig your nails into your palms until you bleed.
His grip falters. His fingers twitch against your skin. And for a moment—just a moment—you think he’s going to let go. Maybe it isn’t so bad after all.
You think maybe he’ll understand.
But then he exhales, and his hand tightens again, his forehead nearly brushing yours as he leans in, voice hoarse.
And he laughs.
He laughs in your face like this is the funniest thing he’s ever heard. – So this is what this is about.
– What?! – The question comes out before you can stop it. You want to sew your mouth shut. You want to tear your skin off your flesh. you should have learned by now that speaking your mind never gets you anywhere. Especially when you speak about your feelings. – What, JJ?! What is this about?!
– You’re jealous. You’re jealous of me and Kie, that’s why you went with them. Are you kidding me?! – Your skin crawls at the sound of his laughter. But disgusting as it is, you’re not angry at him. You’re angry at yourself for having said it. – You’re pathetic. – The word cuts into you. But it isn’t sharp. The opposite, actually. It feels like he’s stabbing at you with something blunt. Bruising your skin and breaking your bones before he can sink into your flesh. – This isn’t about your brother. This is about me! This is about you being completely fucking twisted!
You hate yourself more than anything as tears start brimming your eyes. – Don’t talk to me like this. – You try to move, try to turn your face away, but JJ just grips you harder.
– Like what?! You don’t want me to say the truth? You want me to lie? I can do that, babe. But you’re not gonna like it.
– Get off of me.
– I don’t think I will. – His laughter is manic, loud. At first you hated that he cared so much about John not hearing anything that he didn’t speak his mind, but now you just want him to stop it. – I’m not gonna get off of you. Because I clearly can’t fucking trust you not to do anything stupid when I’m not there to wrangle you in.
– Stop it, JJ. Just get off!
You’re crying now, and you hate it.
You hate crying.
And you hate yourself.
– I can’t fucking believe you! I can’t fucking believe you were so jealous that you had to jump on Rafe fucking Cameron to make you feel better about yourself! Because that’s what you did, wasn’t it?! You slept with him!
The sudden vitriol in his laughter sends you into a spiral. – What are you even talking about?
– Don’t! Don’t fucking lie to me. – He grabs you by the jaw again. – Tell me the fucking truth, just say it! YOU SLEPT WITH RAFE!
– I did not! I didn’t sleep with Rafe, I just met him!
– I CAN SMELL HIM ON YOU! – You can barely breathe within his grip in a second, and he jerks backward in the next, as if the words had knocked the wind out of him. He stands there for a minute, back turned to you, hands pressing against his head, and you don’t know what to do. You just stand there, against the door. – I know you did! I KNOW! I know it! You slept with him, you— You didn’t even see him grab anything, but whatever it was that he took went flying and it shattered against the wall into a million pieces.
The noise was deafening.
You didn’t even realize you had covered your ears until you heard the stark silence jar you in the aftermath.
Your gaze remained on the floor for a second, trying to grasp at what just happened, when a sudden sound startles you out of shock: John’s door was the loudest in the house. No matter what you did, how you oiled it, whether you fixed the hinges or not, the sound still tore through the house like a scream.
You could hear him, his steps, running.
Your hands flew to the deadbolt just in time to see the handle turn.
The door remained in place as he struggled, then called for you, banging against the door in a panic. – What happened?! What was that?! Are you okay?!
You were leaning on the door now. Your strength gone, the fight in you having vanished. – Get out, John. – The voice felt foreign. Cold. Dead. As if it’d come from an outer ego.
You could hear your brother’s stutter. His hands still moving against the handle. Then something else, a twinge of something painful in his voice, something just as foreign. Guilt.
He calls out your name, almost begging. – Open the door, please. Please. Just let me see you.
You can’t think straight.
– I’m fine. Get out.
Your head is spinning.
– Please. Just— Just talk to me. Lets–
– GET OFF JOHN! JUST FUCK OFF! Go back to your room and leave me alone!
You don’t know where the rage came from, how it’d surged on you so fast, how it disappeared just as suddenly. But the scream lingered in between you like a live wire. The door seems to stretch, pushing him away, away from you, farther than you can hear.
John whispers your name one more time, almost thoughtlessly. Like he’s calling for someone he knows is gone.
Silence.
He stands there, wordless, for a minute. Shifting back and forth before your door.
All you hear is his breath before he mumbled: – I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay? – You barely recognize his voice. It’s like you're hearing him underwater. – You should go to sleep. – He whispers.
You don’t answer.
But you lean your head against the door, breathing deeper, and tears roll down your chin.
You don't know how long you stood there.
But you heard the hesitation in his steps as he walked away. You heard the floorboards creaking. You heard his door squeaking loudly, slowly, until it finally snapped shut.
And you remained there, absorbed in the silence, for a long while before you turned around again:
JJ is sitting on your bed, his head in his hands, his shoulders shaking softly. You don’t know when he started crying. You’re not very sure why he is.
But you trudge forward, almost in a trance.
It takes two steps for you to be right in front of him, the ends of his blonde hair brushing against you. Whispering against the fabric of your skirt.
You've been here before.
In this weird deja-vu.
The way he reaches for you, it's almost like slow motion.
His eyes are steel blue, like the edge of a knife. His lips are red, swollen. There are tear streaks running down his face when he looks up at you. Under the dim light, he almost seems like an angel. His knuckles are pale, but you see the rapid pulse beneath the skin of his wrists as his hands reach forward, arms wrapping around you, pulling you in.
You once heard moths weren't smart enough to struggle against flytraps if they closed in on them fast enough.
JJ's arms lock around you before you can react. He holds you like his life depends on it. Tears soaking through your top as he buries his face in your stomach, hiding from something unidentified. Himself, maybe. Perhaps guilt.
Though nothing about the way he acts seems guilty.
Your arms were at your sides before. You don’t know when they came to rest around his shoulders. You don’t know why your hands are tangled in his hair. But you feel his teary lips flutter against your skin as you stroke through the soft strands within your fingers.
He isn’t shaking anymore, but he shudders.
He's still crying, but when he lifts his face to look at you, he almost seems at peace. – You drive me crazy. – He whimpers, bare knuckles cracking against your hips as he squeezes you closer, like he’s feeding off of your warmth. – I feel like I’m going insane
 I don't know how you do this to me.
You don't know what to say.
Even if you did, your mouth wouldn't open.
You've never felt this numb.
His breathing steadies against you. Slow and deep, like a wave pulling back into the ocean. The warmth of his breath seeps through your clothes, the heat of his skin pressed against your stomach, the damp trail his tears left behind cooling under the soft stroke of your fingers through his hair. He exhales sharply when your nails scrape lightly against his scalp, the sound somewhere between relief and something else, something deeper.
His arms are still locked around your waist. The grip loosens, just enough for his hands to move, sliding slowly over the curve of your thighs, fingertips dragging across the fabric. Not a caress. Something closer to an anchor, as if grounding himself in the presence of you, in your softness, in the fact that you’re still here, still touching him, still letting him take and take and take. His hands flex, curling into the back of your legs before going still again. You don’t think he even realizes he’s doing it.
You feel the shift before you see it—the slow tilt of his head, the subtle shudder in his ribs as he exhales against you, his lips parting just enough for his breath to warm your skin. He’s watching you now. His lashes are wet, his eyes still rimmed red, but the way he looks at you is something close to reverence. The way your fingers move through his hair, the way your thumb ghosts along the damp trails on his cheekbone—he drinks in every motion, every second, as if memorizing it. As if memorizing you.
– I don’t like fighting with you. – It’s a whisper, barely there, but the words settle between you, heavy and delicate all at once.
You don’t answer.
You just keep running your fingers through his hair, and his eyes flutter shut, his body softening against yours like an animal melting into its keeper’s touch. His forehead presses into your stomach again, his arms slipping around the backs of your legs, pulling you closer. The tension in his muscles fades as he exhales another slow, steady breath. He’s calm now.
The fragments of whatever he threw at your wall litter your bedroom floor, making a glittering constellation out of the floorboards. But he’s calm now.
– John B’s right, – He murmurs after a long moment, voice muffled against you. – It’s been a long day. – You feel his lips shift into the barest hint of a smile, like a child reassured after a nightmare. – We should go to sleep.
You don’t react when his hands shift again, when he tugs lightly at your shirt, when he tilts his head just enough for his lips to brush over the fabric. You don’t react when his grip on you tightens, when he starts to rise to his feet, hands still firm at your waist, guiding you toward the bed.
But when he tries to pull you down with him, you stop him.
His brows furrow, the haze in his expression flickering into something uncertain. He waits for you to move first, to change your mind, to follow the unspoken rhythm between you. But you don’t. You just stand there, looking at him, the weight of exhaustion pressing into your skin.
– You should go home, JJ.
JJ blinks. Confusion first. Then something else. Something vulnerable. His hands flex at your waist like he’s making sure you’re still there.
You shake your head, and his grip tightens.
– We shouldn’t go to sleep mad, – he says, voice smaller now, unsteady in a way that makes something deep in your stomach twist. – We can fix this.
– I’m not mad at you. – His lips part, like he wants to believe you. Like he needs to. But something in your voice, in your face, keeps him from speaking. – But I don’t want to be with you, right now.
The words land between you like a stone.
His breathing stutters. His fingers twitch at your waist, hesitating, before slipping away.
You don’t look away.
– Baby

– I don’t want to sleep next to you. – Silence. – I really don’t want to see you right now, JJ.
For the first time since he pulled you into him, JJ doesn’t move. He doesn’t reach for you. He just stares. – I know you’re mad, but—
– I’m not mad. – Truthfully, you weren’t sure. But when it came to feelings, exhaustion always outranked them all. – I’m not. But I want you to leave, JJ. I can’t do this right now.
His face shifts as his arms fall back to his sides.
Contempt.
Maybe ridicule.
You don’t know. You can’t bring himself to care.
But he scoffs before he steps away, shoulder bumping yours, almost by accident.
Almost.
And the door knocks closed at last, the sound absorbing every last bit of tension from the room like a sponge.
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The sun streams through your lace curtains as soon as it comes up, 6:30 on the dot on a sunday, but you can't toss around and fall back asleep.
You barely slept.
Whenever, by some miracle, your conscience drifted away from you, it always came back, headlights burning your eyes open to hit you like a truck.
You feel disgusting.
The sweltering heat pushes down against you like a layer of wet concrete: heavy, overwhelming and inescapable.
You’re still wearing the same clothes.
The lower half your body hangs off the mattress, and having kicked off your shoes just before collapsing into the bed, your naked feet brush against the shards JJ's outburst left behind, stinging.
All you can glimpse of the cuts as you move your head to look down are the crimson streaks of blood now running dry.
You struggle to sit up, your head sways when you finally do so. The pounding in your skull is unbearable. You squeeze your eyes shut, but it doesn’t help. The world still spins when you pry them open again.
Glass glints like jagged stars across the floor, scattered in violent constellations.
You stare at the mess, at the thin, half-dried ribbons of red trailing through it, and realize there’s no way out of this without making things worse.
You’ll have to put your shoes on. Walk through it. Grind the shards deeper into the floorboards, deeper into your own skin.
Just the thought makes you shiver.
You reach for the beat-up sneakers, thrown half-hazardly amongst the chaos, and look at them for a moment. Your eyes drift from the shoes to your feet, the pulsing sting of each cut almost begging you not to do it.
You don’t have a choice.
The second the fabric scrapes against the cuts, you hiss through your teeth. Your fingers instinctively curl into a fist. You bite the inside of your cheek and try again, slower this time, forcing yourself through the sting. The laces come undone too easily, sticky with blood. You’ll have to wash them later.
The thought makes your stomach turn.
Once you manage to step out of the room, the pain accompanying you every step of the way, you wonder why you decided to do so in the first place.
Everything is too much.
The pain, the heat, the regret.
No one likes being talked down to, but you’ve always been the sort to dig your heels in when you feel challenged. The way your brother spoke to you before —Before you jumped into Rafe’s car, effectively sealing your fate— was not the sort of thing any sane person could take with a smile.
But it’s tricky, the way it trickles down.
You knew going with Barry was a bad choice, and you followed through for the sake of defiance.
You knew you shouldn’t have fed onto the fire when John first raised his voice, and you did so because you refused to let him walk all over you.
But was it worth it?
You sweep the floor over with a broom, the glass quickly mounting against the wall. Your feet are bleeding, your head is pounding from how much you cried, your back is sore from dragging Rafe everywhere, and you can feel the new bruises both John and JJ left you with already pulsing.
You lean your head against the broomstick, and close your eyes for a moment.
And then—Rafe.
The thought creeps in uninvited, sudden and suffocating. If you feel this bad, if your head is splitting open and your body is aching, how is he feeling? He wasn’t just drunk. He wasn’t just reckless. He was a breath away from dying.
You clutch the broom tighter, fingers aching with the pressure, but the grip on your chest doesn’t ease.
Is he even awake yet?
Is he okay?
You swallow hard, but the lump in your throat doesn’t go anywhere.
Maybe you should check.
But how would you check on him? You don't have his number. The person closest to him you can ask is Sarah, who you doubt Rafe would like to be aware of his drug mishap. And Barry, who does know, probably won’t be responding to anything from you for the next week or so.
You sit back down to take off your shoes and wonder.
It gnaws at you, the not knowing. You don’t care—at least, you tell yourself you don’t—but the weight of it settles in your chest anyway, coiling tighter the longer you sit still.
You should get up. Move. Do something other than dwell on the wreckage, both in your room and in your head.
So you try to force yourself into motion.
Your body protests as you pull yourself up, legs stiff, joints aching. You peel off last night’s clothes, wincing as the fabric sticks to your skin, a mix of dried sweat, salt, and blood. The shower is lukewarm at best, John still hasn’t fixed the heater like he promised, but it rinses the worst of it away. You brace your hands against the tile, letting the water drum over the back of your neck, waiting for it to wash the rest of this feeling down the drain.
But it doesn’t.
By the time you're dressed, tugging your damp hair into something passable, the weight in your chest hasn't budged.
You pull open your dresser and grab your uniform, the cheap fabric wrinkled from being shoved into a drawer.
You should be thinking about work—about the bus you have to get in 5 minutes, about the lunch rush, about the heat in the kitchen, about whether Kiara will be on shift today and if she’ll look at you like she doesn’t remember the talk you had three days ago.
But instead, you think about Rafe.
About how easily he could have died.
About how no one else knows.
About how, if he had, you would’ve been the last person to see him alive.
Your fingers twitch at your sides, itching for a cigarette, a distraction, anything to pull your mind somewhere else.
You’ve given in to the nicotine cravings as you run about the empty living room, looking for your keys. You have your father to thank for your smoking habit, he smoked maniacally ever since you could remember, but the reason poverty hasn’t forced you to go cold turkey a long time ago is JJ. —Your house might be empty of food, and maybe you’re behind on the light bill and the city shuts down your power again, but if there are two things JJ and John keep in stock around the place, those things are cheap beer and marlboro lights.— You fish a cigarette from a half-smoked package on the counter, struggling with the lighter for a while before you finally give up and use the stove.
You think you’d be a little more relieved when the chemicals finally start sinking in, but your eyes catch the door just as you inhale. JJ’s shoes are still sitting beside it.
He hasn’t left.
You look around for a moment, mind slowly drifting back to the blonde. But you don’t let yourself linger there. Instead, you grab your keys and slip out the door before you can bump into him.
Public transport in the Outer Banks is less than stellar. Everyday you commute with at least 70 other people, just as broke and anxious as you are, in that crammed bus: the single line that goes from anywhere near your house to about a 20 minute walk away from The Wreck.
It’s a miracle anyone ever found a place to sit, and of course, no divine intervention permitted that miracle ever happen to you. So you spend the half an hour ride standing on your cut up feet, to prepare yourself for the next eight hours of running around in that stuffy kitchen, listening to Anthony, the head Chef, and his inexorable screaming, and Mr. Carrera’s endless scolding of the kitchen’s staff’s time.
The air inside The Wreck’s kitchen is thick with the scent of seared meat and butter, the hum of the ventilation system barely cutting through the clatter of knives against cutting boards and the sharp hiss of oil meeting raw protein. The moment you step through the swinging doors, the heat slams into you, clinging to your skin like a second layer.
Willis is already at his station, sleeves rolled up, hands working quickly over a slab of beef. He doesn’t look up as he calls out. – Took your sweet time getting here, didn’t you Routledge?
You sling your bag into your locker, ignoring the jab. – Morning to you too, hon.
He snorts, finally glancing up. – Barely. – There’s a glint in his eyes, you’ve seen it a thousand times before. The look he gets when he wants to gossip.
– Go ahead, Will. Spill it.
It’s early enough that the kitchen is still in its controlled chaos phase —everyone moving, prepping, getting ready for the inevitable hellstorm of the lunch rush. You grab your apron, tying it tight around your waist, and wash your hands before heading to your station. The prep list is long, but that’s nothing new.
– There’s nothing to spill. – He hums. – Unless you know something. – Willis mutters as you start working, his knife gliding through a rib rack with practiced efficiency, you raise an eyebrow at him, waiting for the bomb to drop. – Boss is in a mood. Apparently his daughter didn’t come home last night.
– Kie? – He hums in agreement. You wonder why.
– I heard the two of them arguing in the back this morning. He was talking about a boy driving her here. It’s not your brother, is it? Aren’t they friends?
– John has a girlfriend.
Willis laughs knowingly. – That never stopped anyone. – You force yourself to smile back at him, though it's the last thing you want to do. – Anyway. Don’t get in his way today. You know he’s already iffy on you.
– Well, there go my plans for the morning! – You mutter, and he chuckles, passing his cut over to you. The conversation’s over. But his words still echo in your mind.
You're thankful for the work, for once. The familiar motions take over—seasoning, basting, trimming fat, getting everything ready to be fired later. The methodical nature of it helps, the repetition keeping your mind from wandering where it shouldn’t.
The doors swing open, and Kiara walks in with an empty tray balanced on her hip.
The noise of the kitchen swallows whatever she says to another server, but you feel her gaze before you see it. When you glance up, your eyes meet for just a second—hers unreadable, yours careful— before you turn back to your work. There’s nothing to say, nothing worth dredging up in the middle of prep.
Hours slip by in a steady churn of orders, the quiet build of the morning shifting into the controlled chaos of the rush. By noon, the kitchen is swamped, the air thick with steam and stress. Anthony's voice cuts through the din, barking orders as plates fly from station to station. Your hands move on autopilot, flipping steaks, checking temperatures, slicing roasts. Willis works beside you, muttering curses under his breath every time an order gets sent back for modifications.
Then, the ticket comes in.
You don’t read it at first, just reach for the next cut of meat, eyes scanning the details like second nature. Roast dish, standard sides. Peanut-glazed roast chicken.
You hesitate for a fraction of a second, the words sticking out. It’s been a while since you saw that dish being ordered, you were almost sure they took it out of the menu. The request is simple enough, nothing unusual. But something about it needles at the back of your mind.
You push the thought aside, refocusing. Just another plate in the middle of the rush. Another ticket among dozens.
Nothing to worry about.
You get to work on the glaze. The sauce pan is already waiting on the stove, a thin layer of oil shimmering in the heat. You move fast, scooping a generous spoonful of peanut butter into the pan, letting it loosen and melt as you stir.
A splash of soy sauce, a drizzle of honey. The scent blooms instantly—sweet, nutty, rich. You reach for the rice vinegar next, just a touch to cut through the heaviness. Then, garlic, grated fine, barely a whisper of sharpness underneath the smooth layers of flavor. The heat coaxes everything together, the sauce thickening, darkening, turning glossy as you work.
A final stir, a taste.
It’s perfect.
The timer dings. You pull the chicken from the oven, the skin crisped and golden, the juices pooling at the edges of the pan. With a practiced hand, you brush the glaze over the surface, the deep amber sheen soaking into the heat, clinging to the curves of the roast. Another minute under the broiler—just long enough for the sugars to caramelize, for the edges to darken into something tempting.
The moment it’s done, you move fast. A quick slice, checking for doneness. Then plating: the chicken settled onto a warmed plate, nestled against a bed of seasoned rice. A handful of crushed peanuts sprinkled over top, a sprig of fresh cilantro for contrast. Every detail placed with intention.
One last look.
Then the plate is up, Kie already reaching for it, her eyes drifting through you one last time. You watch over your shoulder as she carries it out, disappearing beyond the swinging doors.
It’s out of your hands now. But the feeling lingers. That quiet, nagging thought.
Something about this order doesn’t sit right.
You throw yourself into the rhythm of the kitchen, trying to drown out that nagging feeling with movement. There’s too much to do, too much heat, too much noise—no room for doubt. The oil hisses as you slide a seared steak onto a plate, the scent of garlic and thyme curling up with the steam. You reach for a handful of fries, tossing them onto the side, then move on, wiping down the station before plating the next order.
Your hands are steady, but your mind isn’t.
It’s stupid. It’s just a dish. But something about it lingers, sticks to you like the grease on your skin.
– Hey, – Willis speaks up from beside you, not looking up from the salmon he’s searing. – You got that worried look on your face again, what's going on?
You scoff, grabbing a garnish. – What, my thinking face? I know it's hard to believe, what with me being so pretty and all, but sometimes I do actually think.
He finally glances up, raising a brow. – Spill.
You roll your eyes, shaking your head as you reach for another plate. – I’m fine. Just wondering if we’ll make it through lunch rush without Anthony popping a vein.
Willis snorts. – Fat chance.
You flash him a smirk, hoping it looks convincing. It doesn’t matter, because before he can push any further the kitchen doors burst open.
The air shifts.
A new kind of heat floods the room—thick, charged, the kind that makes people tense without thinking.
Mr. Carrera stands in the doorway, eyes scanning the kitchen like a predator. – Who made the peanut-glazed chicken?
The words slice through the chaos like a knife through flesh.
You freeze for half a second—just half. But Willis notices. His gaze flicks to you, sharp, before you even turn to face Mr. Carrera.
Your throat is suddenly dry. – I did.
Mr. Carrera moves. Storms down the kitchen like a bull with a target, weaving through stations without breaking stride. The space around you tightens, the air sucked out of the room.
Willis takes a step back. He’s not going to get in the way of this.
No one is.
And then—he’s there.
Standing in front of you, looming.
And you know, whatever this is, whatever you missed, it’s bad. – You could’ve killed someone, Routledge. You know that?!
Your mind rushes.
You think of every step and every second you spent on that dish. Every spoonful of each spice, every condiment, every sauce. There was nothing out of the ordinary.
If anything, you paid more attention to it than to any of the other dishes you were making. – I don't understand, sir.
The kitchen remains a vortex, the noise of plates, the roar of fire, the shouts from the servers, they still echo again and again through the thick walls of the room, but none of the cooks make a sound.
They don't scream.
They don't curse.
They don’t ask.
They're all quiet, eyes drifting between you and their work.
– The customer you made that for. He has a nut allergy. You could’ve killed him, Routledge! Do you have any idea how long I spent trying to convince him not to sue?!
You freeze.
For a moment, you want to laugh. You feel it coming up your throat, inching into your face in the way your cheek twitches. But you bite your tongue the last second.
– Did he eat it?
– We ought to be glad he didn't! Do you have any idea what could have happened if he had a reaction here?! How much money we would’ve lost?!
– He asked for a peanut-glazed roast chicken, sir. There was nothing else in the ticket. Just that. – Kie is standing by the door, looking over at the two of you. A couple servers look at her weird as they push through her. You can't read her face. —Concern, doubt, curiosity— Whatever emotion dances in her face remains shrouded in her attempt to keep it blank. – Kie was the one who rang it in. Right, Kie? The ticket said peanut-glazed roast chicken.
She doesn't even make a move to speak.
But her father is already shouting at you again: – You want to tell me that a man who is allergic to nuts would've asked for a peanut-glazed dish?!
You don't want to insult him.
You can't afford to lose this job.
But this conversation is getting more idiotic by the second. – It wouldn’t be the first time it happened, sir.
You’re not lying.
Your breaks are populated by the endless recollection of people who knowingly or not ask for dishes they're allergic to, then come back to make a scandal.
All the other restaurants you’ve worked at were the same.
But Mr. Carrera looks at you as if you had just spat on him. – What did you just say to me?!
– It wouldn’t be the first time it happened.
Anthony comes in, pushing his sleeves further up his forearms like he does whenever he wants to seem tough. – What’s happening?
You open your mouth, but the owner cuts in before you can utter a word. – Your cook just made a peanut dish for someone who is deathly allergic!
–You did what?! – It's a scolding, but he shouts it at you like a bark. You try not to shrink into yourself. – What the fuck is your problem, Routledge?!
– The customer asked for a peanut-glazed roast chicken, Chef! I just did what was written on the ticket!
You don't like the way your voice rises. The way it trembles slightly. But you can't help it. You feel your pulse starting to roar in your ears, the adrenaline that was already there making you shake.
– The customer did?! The customer that's allergic to fucking peanuts?!
Anthony's favorite past-time is wishing people choke to death on whatever they're allergic to. He says it at least once every shift. Yet he’s acting like it’s the most absurd thing he ever heard. Treating you like an idiot.
– You know better than anyone it’s not the first time this happened, Chef. – You shouldn’t have to explain yourself. You don’t know why they're going so hard on you. – Joey, – You’re calling for the pastry chef before you can help yourself. – Joey! Didn’t you just have to re-do the caramelized pineapple tarte because the customer was allergic to pineapple?
The freckled boy looks up from a dessert plating, and nods, but before his mouth opens, Mr. Carrera interrupts you again: – Don’t try to shift the blame here Routledge!
– I'm not shifting any blame! This isn’t anyone's fault! The ticket said Peanut-glazed roast chicken, so I got on my station and made a Peanut-glazed roast chicken! I can’t read the customer's mind!
– Don't start getting smart with me now, girl! You got the dish wrong and you don't want to admit it!
– I did what was on the ticket! That’s all I did!
You turn around, already looking over the tickets on the dashboard, but as soon as the paper is in your hand, someone yanks you back. – Don't turn your back on me!
– Look, Look here— This is the ticket!
– Don't talk back at me!
– I'm not! I'm just trying to show you—
– Take off that apron! – Your face falls. You look back at Anthony, his eyes widening for a split second under his thick black brows, but he remains there, naked arms crossed over his Chef's whites, not moving a muscle. – Take that apron off right now, Routledge!
– Mr. Carrera—You're stuttering. Head spinning. You don’t know where to look. – Please—
– Take it off!
– I need this job, sir, please. Please. I'm sorry—
– Take it the fuck off before I have security drag you out of here, Routledge! Take it off!
Willis places his hand on your shoulder, pulling you back softly. You're shaking. His eyes shift as he looks at you as well, and only then you realize you were crying. How long has it been? Months, Maybe a year since you cried. And now you've done it three times within the span of 12 hours. – With all due respect, sir—
– I don’t need your due respect, Redfield. Get back to your work!
– Mr. Carrera
 – He tries again.
– GET BACK TO WORK!
Willis retreats as soon as he's come forward.
– Please, please. I can’t lose this job. – You look at Anthony, then back at Mr. Carrera before the pity starts forming on the chef's face.
– Should've thought about that before you disrespected me!
– Michael, – Anthony's voice is level, the closest to pleading he'll ever come. Even he seems a little confused. – I can’t finish the day with a single Roast chef, half the orders go to them.
– Chef? This girl isn't a chef, Anthony! She's just a cook! A cook that clearly has no idea of what she's doing!
– Chef, please
 – You're begging. You don't know what else to do.
– I won’t tell you another time, Routledge! Take that fucking apron off!
Anthony looks away from you as the screams echo around the kitchen. He shifts on his feet for a moment, almost as if he didn’t know where to go.
You reach for your back, undoing the double knotted bow you became so used to doing with shaky hands.
Mr. Carrera still looks at you expectantly after you lay the apron in his hands. – The uniform, Routledge.
You want to disappear. – I'm not wear—
– TAKE IT OFF!
You feel a dozen pairs of eyes on you.
The tears that fall from your eyes feel like acid as they run down your face, more and more constant as humiliation sears you from the inside out.
Your fingers reach for the black buttons of your chef's white. You had stolen a couple buttons from your dad's old suit to fix this uniform, when they tore at the beginning of this year, before he’d disappeared.
It's fitting that, even if spirit, he's here to watch you be scrutinised.
You can just hear him now:
“What’d you think would happen?”
The cheap fabric scrapes against the bruises on your arms. The fainter bruises around your neck, where JJ had grabbed you, in full display.
“You should've known better” He would say.
You can't say you're glad for the less revealing sports bra you're wearing. Because you feel as if you're standing, naked, in front of these men when you finally pull the coat off.
“Can't say I'm surprised”
– Get out of my kitchen, Routledge. – Kie's father's voice is a blade. You can’t look him in the eye. You don’t want to see him look at you. – I better not see you when you come to get your things.
You barely muster the strength to whisper a “yes sir” before he pushes past his daughter, out into the salon again.
Anthony holds your coat. His pity burning holes into your skin. – Routledge—
You don't let him finish it.
You just raise your hand, holding down a sob, and say – I'm sorry, chef.
The door doesn't hit you on the way out, but it feels like the world has crumbled around you as you sit down on the concrete and sink your head in your hands.
You sink onto the curb, your knees knocking together as you fold in on yourself, arms wrapping tight around your middle like you can hold yourself together by force. But it’s useless. You feel hollowed out, like a pit has been scooped from your chest, leaving only raw, open air where something solid used to be.
The sounds of the restaurant leak out onto the street—laughter, clinking plates, the rhythm of a dinner rush you are no longer a part of. The life you've had for three years, ripped away like it had never belonged to you in the first place.
JJ's words are the ones that echo in your mind now: "They always win, don’t they? They always win and we're left to scrap by."
You stare down at your hands, your fingers stiff, still curled like you’re gripping something, though there’s nothing there. Nothing left. The buttons, stolen from your father’s suit, glint dully in your palm. You try to close your fist around them, but they press into your skin, sharp, biting. A cruel joke. Even the things you steal for yourself are taken back in the end.
The back of your throat burns, tight and aching. Your breath stutters, and for a second, you think you might stop crying—but you don’t. You can’t. Instead, the grief settles, thick and choking, pressing against your ribs, your skull, crushing you from the inside out.
You tilt your head back, staring up at the sky, searching for something—anything—to ground you, but the sky is smudged, blurred, swallowed by the glow of a city that’s barely there. There’s nothing up there. Just empty space stretching forever, indifferent to the small, insignificant thing you have become.
Have always been.
And then—your father’s voice again. Not real, but real enough.
“Is this what you thought would happen? Did you really think you could keep up?”
Your nails dig into your palms. You know you should move. Get up, go home, figure out what comes next. But you stay where you are, stuck in this moment, in this feeling. Stripped down, exposed, like a wound left open to the air.
A car rumbles past, the headlights flashing over you. And for one terrible, fleeting second, you think about standing up—stepping forward—just enough.
But then it's gone. The thought, the headlights, the car.
You exhale shakily. Pull your knees closer. And keep sitting there.
A sound cuts through the noise—sharp, distant. Your name.
You don’t move at first. The world around you is muffled, drowned beneath the weight pressing against your ears, the thick, suffocating quiet that only grief can bring. The restaurant’s noise hums at the edges of your senses, blurred and detached, as if you are hearing it from underwater.
You don’t know how long you’ve been here. Time has unraveled, slipped through your fingers like the buttons in your palm.
Your name again, firmer this time. A presence at the edge of your vision.
Slowly, you lift your head.
Rafe stands a few feet away, his Range Rover parked in the shadowed corner of the lot. The keys dangle from his hand, catching the light. He’s smiling—like he always does, like this is nothing, like you’re just two people crossing paths on an ordinary night.
But then he sees you.
Sees your face.
And his smile vanishes, something darker flashing through his face.
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inadaydream99 · 16 hours ago
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When You Sit in Their Lap
A/N - I just had to

Disclaimer: This does not represent any of the members in real life and is for entertainment purposes only.
Bang Chan
Chan is used to being the one offering comfort, whether it’s to you, his members, or anyone who comes to him with a problem. So when you settle into his lap without hesitation, his first reaction is a chuckle that’s full of warmth and affection.
His hands immediately rest on your waist, fingers pressing into your sides as he adjusts you to make sure you’re comfortable.
“You could’ve warned me first, y’know,” he murmurs, but there’s no real complaint in his tone.
Before you can respond, he tightens his arms around you, resting his chin on your shoulder. His breath is warm against your skin as he leans ever so slightly to place a gentle kiss.
“Not that I mind.” His touch is gentle but firm, and you can feel the steady rhythm of his breathing beneath you.
If he was working on something, he’ll absentmindedly return to it, one hand still holding you close. But if it’s late at night and the two of you are unwinding, expect him to shift slightly, pulling you even closer into a proper cuddle.
Lee Minho
Minho’s first reaction is a raised brow, his lips twitching ever so slightly in amusement.
“You’re bold,” he remarks, tilting his head slightly as he looks up at you. But despite his teasing, his hands instinctively settle on your hips, holding you in place like he was expecting you to do this all along.
His eyes scan your face, gauging your expression before he smirks.
“Is my lap really that comfortable?” he muses, his fingers lightly tracing patterns on your thighs.
He pretends not to care, but the way his hands tighten slightly whenever you shift gives him away. If you try to move away, he won’t stop you outright, but he will let out a soft scoff and pull you right back.
“You sat down first. Stay.”
If he’s feeling particularly playful, he might lean in close and whisper, “If you wanted my attention, there were easier ways to ask, you know.”
Seeing your flustered reaction only makes his smirk turn more devilish, before he moves one of his hands to cup your cheek and gently forces you to maintain his eye contact.
Seo Changbin
The moment you sit on Changbin’s lap, his eyebrows shoot up in surprise before a slow grin spreads across his face.
“Oh? What’s this?” he teases, his arms naturally wrapping around you, locking you in place.
His hands settle on your waist, thumbs rubbing small circles against your sides as he leans back slightly, completely content with your weight against him.
“You’re not getting up now,” he adds with a chuckle, giving your waist a playful squeeze.
Changbin isn’t one to shy away from affection, and if you make yourself comfortable, he’ll take it as an invitation to wrap his arms around you more securely, pressing a soft kiss against your temple.
“You just made a big mistake,” he jokes, “because now I’m never letting you go.”
He might even start rocking the both of you gently, fully enjoying the excuse to hold you close.
Hwang Hyunjin
Hyunjin freezes for a brief moment before his lips curl into a slow, mischievous smile. “Oh?” he hums, tilting his head slightly as he stares up at you. His hands find your waist, warm and firm, as he adjusts his posture to accommodate you better.
“You should be careful,” he murmurs, his voice dropping into that soft, teasing tone that makes your heart race. “Sitting here means you’re mine for the next hour at least.”
He buries his face into the crook of your neck, pressing a lingering kiss against your skin and when you squirm you feel his grin against your shoulder, his arms tightening around you to stop you from twisting yourself enough to see his expression.
Hyunjin thrives on physical affection, so he takes full advantage of the moment—playing with your fingers, swaying slightly with you in his arms, or tracing patterns on your thighs.
“Comfy?” he asks, though his tone makes it clear he already knows the answer.
And if you even think about moving? He’ll pout dramatically and whine, “Stay just a little longer,” a satisfied smirk on his face knowing you can’t refuse him.
Han Jisung
Jisung stares at you for a second before gasping dramatically, placing a hand over his chest like he’s just been personally attacked.
“You really just—sat down? No warning? No heads-up?” he exclaims, though his laughter betrays him.
Before you can respond, he sighs dramatically and leans into you, arms looping lazily around your waist.
“Guess I have no choice but to accept my fate,” he mutters, nuzzling against your shoulder with a playful pout.
Despite his teasing, you can feel how relaxed he becomes with you in his arms. He’ll absentmindedly play with the hem of your shirt or run his fingers along your back, fully enjoying the warmth of your presence.
If you shift too much, he’ll tighten his hold and whine, “Hey, stop moving, you’re gonna ruin the moment!”
If he’s in a particularly clingy mood, he’ll lay his head against your chest and mumble, “You can’t just sit here and expect me not to fall asleep.” And honestly? He might just do exactly that.
Lee Felix
Felix’s immediate reaction is pure joy—his eyes light up, and a soft giggle escapes his lips as he instinctively wraps his arms around your waist.
“Aww, you wanna cuddle?” he coos, his deep voice laced with warmth.
Holding you close, his hands rub soothing circles on your back. “You’re so warm,” he murmurs, resting his head against your shoulder.
When you let out a little hum in response, he smiles and nuzzles into you even more.
“You’re not allowed to leave now,” he adds, his grip tightening slightly.
Felix lives for moments like these, so he’ll fully embrace the situation—rocking you gently, playing with your fingers, or even humming a soft tune against your skin.
If you try to move, he’ll pout dramatically. “But I’m so comfy,” he whines, giving you those wide, pleading eyes. And let’s be honest—you’re not getting up anytime soon.
Kim Seungmin
Seungmin raises an eyebrow, unimpressed. “Really?” he deadpans, watching as you settle into his lap. But even as he acts indifferent, his hands immediately move to secure you in place, his grip firm on your waist.
“You’re bold,” he remarks, but there’s a slight smirk tugging at his lips.
His fingers lazily trace patterns against your sides, his warmth seeping into you despite his teasing exterior.
If you try to move away, he won’t stop you, but he will tighten his grip just enough to make you hesitate.
“You started this,” he reminds you. “Deal with it.”
Despite his playful sarcasm, you can feel how comfortable he is with you there. Then you feel him lean you both further back and hear him sigh dramatically. “Guess I have to tolerate this now,” he muses, his tone dry but his actions betraying him as he rubs slow circles on your back.
Yang Jeongin
Jeongin stiffens slightly, caught off guard by your sudden closeness. His ears turn pink almost instantly, and he blinks up at you. “Oh. Um. Hi?”
But within seconds, he relaxes, a small, shy smile forming on his lips.
“You’re comfy,” he admits softly, his arms tentatively wrapping around your waist. His grip is gentle at first, but as the warmth between you settles in, he holds you a little tighter, more securely.
He lets out a contented sigh, leaning his forehead against your shoulder. “You’re not allowed to move now,” he murmurs, his voice slightly muffled.
And if you try? He pouts, tightening his grip with a quiet, “Nope. Stay here.”
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lvrrgirlll · 2 days ago
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Running a cozy little bed and breakfast and hobo!Patrick charms you into letting him stay for free
The little bell sat on the front desk dinging broke your attention from the coffee you were in the process of making yourself. Walking through the doorway between the kitchen and front entryway, you smile, seeing the disheveled man before you, tapping his fingers against the desk mindlessly.
“Hi, um, I was wondering if I could get a room for the night,” the man asked, tired eyes meeting yours hopefully.
“Of course, it’s $100 a night and that includes breakfast in the morning.” You don’t miss how clearly attractive he is. He looks to be around your age —maybe a little older— and has a sort of swagger that you can’t exactly describe, even despite his tired state.
As he held his credit card up to the machine on the end of the desk, the hopeful look in his eyes seemed to dissipate. He chuckled, looking up at you and offering a tight lipped smile as if it was just a mistake with the machine. “One second
” he murmured, pulling out his phone to check his bank account. You didn’t miss the quiet “oh fuck” that left his mouth as he looked down at his phone before putting it back in his pocket.
He leaned on the desk, laughing dryly as a smirk crossed his face. “So uh
 funny story, sweetheart. I’m sort of short on funds. But I’m a tennis player, I’m playing in the challenger a couple miles down the road and if I could just crash here tonight I can pay you back when I win
” His expression is smug but his voice drips with desperation. You can see the dark circles under his eyes and the way his eyelids hang low. He’s endearing, but admittedly smells sort of
 ripe. And his pleading eyes really sell it all. How could you say no to him?
Smiling at him again, trying to be warm and understanding, not wanting to embarrass him for his lack of funds, you nod. “Um- sure, you can stay here tonight without paying
 yet, that is. As long as you’re sure you’ll win that thing.”
“Oh, I don’t think we have to worry about that,” he muses cockily. “But I get a minimum for just playing in the first round anyways, so even if I lose tomorrow I’ll be able to pay you,” he tacks on seriously.
“Alrighty,” you nod again. “You can follow me up to your room.”
The two of you walk silently up the stairs where 4 doors lie in a small hallway. You open one up, motioning for him to enter as you turn the lights on. The room is quaint but in a cozy sort of way. You ensure he’s settled in and knows where everything is before moving for the door, ready to leave him be. Something in you, though, longs to keep him around as long as you can. His charming air has captured you.
“Have you already eaten dinner,” you ask, turning to look at him, leaning on the doorframe.
Something flashes across his face —surprise maybe. He seems genuinely flattered by your question. Maybe it was just the fact that he hadn’t actually eaten, too eager to get where he was going and concerned he wouldn’t have enough gas if he pulled off the highway to stop anywhere, or maybe it was because he found you irresistible, but he felt a pang of hunger (which type, who’s to say?) in that moment.
“No, I, uh
 I haven’t eaten, actually,” he replies gently.
You hum in understanding. “Well I was going to make myself some grilled cheese and tomato soup if you want any? It’s the slow season here so it’s just you and me, but you’re welcome to join if you like.” He nods as you leave with another sweet smile, heading down to the kitchen.
Right as you’re getting the second sandwich out of the pan, your heart footsteps on the creaky floorboards, alerting you of his presence. “Oh, hi. Dinner’s ready.”
He nods, taking a seat at the small table in the kitchen. You bring over his food, then yours, before moving to the fridge, asking if he wanted anything to drink. “Got any beer,” he asks carelessly. You turn around holding two beers in your hands, smiling from ear to ear.
Over dinner the two of you talk about his tennis career, where he strategically avoids telling you about his sort of ‘fall from grace’ and how he got to the point he got to. You’re impressed, of course. He asks you about what made you start a b&b in some random countryside town, to which you tell him how it had been run by your late grandmother before you took over when your parents decided they didn’t want the business. He comments how nice it was for you to do something like that.
Despite his obviously sort of sleazy vibe, he’s been so kind thus far. You’re completely enraptured in him and he knows it too. He can see it in the way you look at him and the way you bite your lip when he says something sort of risquĂ© and the way you rub your thighs together when he stretches, revealing the tiniest bit of his toned abdomen.
The night ends with him in your room instead of his own, taking out all of his troubles on you in the most pleasant ways imaginable. Safe to say, you let him stay through the whole challenger, no longer really worried about the money, but more about the devilishly handsome man before you.
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thedemonofcat · 2 days ago
Note
Jaskier brings Geralt along to some bard competition.
During said competition, Geralt meets Valdo Marx, and he suddenly understands why Jaskier hates the man so much. The witcher does a very good job of just ignoring the man until he makes the mistake of trying to slander Jaskier.
Most times, Geralt would just punch someone in the face for saying such things. He knows that may cause problems for Jaskier though.
He observes the elaborate outfit Marx is wearing and gets an idea. Subtly, he cuts a few key ribbons just enough that they'll only break if the man moves around a lot. Say, while dancing.
Jaskier didn't think he could be more in love with Geralt.
Everyone in the room stood frozen, eyes locked on Valdo. Then, a few chuckles broke the silence, followed by scattered laughter. But as Valdo’s face turned red with fury, his glare settled on Jaskier.
“You dirty little half-breed,” he spat.
He stormed toward Jaskier, but before he could get too close, Geralt stepped forward, yanking the bard behind him. His stance was clear—protective, unwavering.
“I should have known you’d pull something like this,” Valdo seethed. Then, to Geralt’s surprise, he turned his attention to him. “Well, witcher, you hunt monsters. Kill that thing behind you.”
Geralt’s expression hardened. “What are you talking about?”
Valdo let out a sharp laugh. “Oh, he doesn’t know, does he, Julian?” He looked past Geralt, and Geralt followed his gaze—to Jaskier, who had shrunk back, fear in his eyes.
“Everyone from Bremervoord to Redania knows the rumor,” Valdo continued, voice dripping with malice. “How Jaskier’s mother, Lady Pankratz, vanished into the woods all those years ago—only to return nine months later with a child.”
The room buzzed with whispered speculation, each rumor more twisted than the last.
Geralt had always suspected Jaskier wasn’t entirely human. He had never cared. But watching Jaskier cower under their scrutiny ignited a deep, simmering anger within him.
Valdo sneered. “So, witcher, I’ll pay you more coin than you could ever dream of—if you kill that thing.”
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asdfghjklartblog · 17 hours ago
Text
My Time
Trans masc reader x yandere batfam
I’ve been getting into vocaloid songs, or like songs that use Teto and Miku’s voices. Anyways since I used to be really into Miku I wanted to use that cause well
 What kind of person doesn’t love Miku?
I hope you guys like it. I think there’s some spelling mistakes or typos and if there is, sorry :P but otherwise I don’t got much to say! Good reading! It’s about 5.8k words! Yay!
Your mother, m/n was a beautiful woman. Strong, charming, and stubborn, at least that’s what your daddy said. And you might not remember mommy, but you trust daddy. He says that mommy loved you, that she loved you so much, but that she couldn’t come back. You didn’t really understand, not at the time. I mean how could a two-year-old grapple with the concept of death? However, even though your mom left, you weren’t lonely, you had daddy. Daddy wasn’t your real father, no, but he’s the one that’s been loving you and taking care of you. He’s the one that told you stories when you went to bed, tucked you in and kissed you good night. He held you when you were scared, cuddled you when you wanted love. He was everything you could ever want, he promised to stay with you till you got sick of him. He promised he’d be there for you no matter what.
You woke up for your first day of preschool, and when you go to look at your little froggy clock you saw that it was already 9 in the morning. You ran over to your daddy’s room excitedly chattering about how you were going to be late because of him which makes you giggle, because usually daddy would chastise and tease you about making them late. You open the door to find him still, there’s stab wounds all over his chest and dried blood all over the bed, his eyes are dull and lifeless and there’s bruises at his neck and wrists.
You shiver as a breeze comes through the open window. You stand there for a while, confused on what to do. There’s this bad feeling in your stomach but despite that you slowly approach the bed. You poke your dad and try to wake him up, you notice that he’s cold, daddy’s never cold. He’s always warm and comforting and perfect for cuddles. You start crying, not really knowing why. You climb up on the bed and curl up beside him. The sheets are crusty with blood and it feels all gross and but that doesn’t really matter to you right now. You just want to stay here with daddy.
You don’t know how long you’re there but at some point daddy’s phone rings. You stare at it, frozen in place before you climb down from the bed and go over to it. You pick up the phone and a woman says. “Hello! This is Thierry Preschool, we were wondering if your child y/n was still coming? It’s been about two hours since it started and we were just checking.”
You don’t know what to say to her. You fidget a bit before mumbling. “H-Hello. Daddy can’t come to the phone right now. Um. I’m scared. Daddy isn’t moving and there’s blood all over? That’s bad, right? Daddy’s cold and everything and -and I don’t know what to do!”
You start sniffling, on the verge of crying again as the person on the other line stays silent. She then gently and calmly says. “Honey, it’s going to be okay. Can you tell me where you live honey? Calm down and watch some TV or read a book, okay honey? Can you do that for me? Can you be strong for me?”
You sniffle and nod trying to get out a choked up “Yeah.” From your throat. You try your best to mumble out an address as she coos about how good of a job you’re doing and how she needs you to stay calm. Before she hangs up, she tells you that some nice men will come to pick you up and that you have to be good for them. You nod and mumble an okay. You go back to curl up against your daddy, you bury your face into his chest and whisper to him.
“People are coming. It’s okay daddy. We’ll be okay. I love you. You’ll wake up soon right? Please? I’ll be a good girl daddy I promise.”
The nice men come and they look at you and daddy with
 An expression you’ve never seen before. It makes you feel worse. They try to tear you away from him but you hold onto daddy with a death grip while you scream and shout as they try to convince you to let go. You’re scared. You don’t wanna let him go. They eventually pry you away from him as you wail and try your best to wriggle out of their hold. After that, it’s a bit of a blur. You were wrangled into a police car as one of them sat in the backseat with you trying to calm you down.
You look out the window, watching as the officer drives through the streets, going through traffic. You’re escorted into a building and taken into a room where a police officer try to question you gently. However the next thing you know everything gets blurry, it’s hard to breathe and it feels like your insides are spiky. When you can breathe again some man with a scruffy face and blocky glasses is holding you close to his chest saying things like. “It’s okay, you’re alright.” And “Breathe, breathe for me.” You calm down, not because of his words, but because he looks a bit like dad. His scruffy face, his gentle smile, his dark green eyes. It makes you bury your face into the man’s chest and whisper out a small broken. “Don’t leave me.”
The next thing you can remember was the man carrying you around like a baby, mostly because even after the weird “panic attack” or whatever the police officer called it, you wouldn’t let go of him. Which made the man holding you look at you sadly. He gives in and instead of forcing you to let go and go back to doing work, he starts showing you all kinds of things, giving you a tour around the police station. You learn from one of the men that the guy holding you is named Commissioner Gordon. Weird name. It sounds kinda cool though.
Once you’ve fully calmed down he carries you over to where a nurse is and he distracts you by talking about dinosaurs which you excitedly listen to while they draw some blood to see if you’re healthy and to notify any blood relatives. Commie says you’re being a very good girl and that they’ll have results in less than an hour, he also asks if you’re hungry which you nod enthusiastically to. He then leaves to get you some chips and a donut from the break room. You’re about to start chowing down before Commie asks. “Hold on there kid, isn’t there something you need to say before eating?”
You stand there staring at him and then make an ‘Oh!’ face and say. “Thanks Commie!”
You don’t notice but as you start eating the donut that a couple of the police officers laugh while Commie cracks a smile and then huffs before saying. “Kid, Commissioner isn’t my first name. It’s Jim.”
You then absentmindedly say as you take another bite of the donut. “Oh. Okay Jimmy.”
One of the guards starts laughing again and this time even Jimmy chuckles. However someone comes in and whispers to Jimmy and he then turns back to the person as they whisper to each other. Another officer takes it upon himself to distract and picks you up before throwing you up into the air and catching you. Making you giggle and ask for more. Jimmy approaches again and he subtly asks the officer distracting you to put you down. Jimmy takes a knee looking at you at eye level and hesitates before saying. “We
 Found some people you’re
 Related to. We called them up and asked if they’d take you in, and he said yes. Do you know Bruce Wayne? He’s your daddy-“
You immediately interrupt him saying. “But I already have a daddy. I don’t need another one-“
Jimmy interrupts you trying to gently say. “I’m sorry. But.. Your daddy
 He can’t take care of you anymore-“
“What do you mean? Why? Can’t you help him? I’ve been waiting and being a good girl! Does daddy not want me anymore?”
“Honey-“
“No! I’ve been good! Daddy said he’d stay with me! He promised, h-he-“
Jimmy interrupts with a firm call of your name which makes you stop. He puts a hand on your shoulder and brings you into a hug as he gently says to you. “I’m sorry. He’s gone.” As those words tumble out of his mouth you tear up again and you raise your arms to cling on to him for dear life. You bawl and hiccup and he’s there to take all of your anger, your sadness until you’ve calmed down again. He pulls away from you and tries to talk to you, but you’re tired. You’re sad, you don’t have the energy to talk. He sighs and then holds your hand and guides you to a bench, he pats your head and says. “How about you wait here? Since your room is not exactly under investigation I could maybe swipe some things for you? Do you have a favorite toy or picture I can get for you?”
You wait trying to think about what you would want from your room. You think of your little stuffed owl that daddy named Oliver and your stuffed cat you named Oliver 2. You want the picture on your nightstand of you, mommy and daddy. You want the special night light daddy made for you. You want your dinosaur pjs daddy got for your birthday, you try your best to relay this Jimmy but all that comes out are little mumbles and whimpers.
He sighs and says with a small smile. “Tell ya what kid, when you go stay with da- Bruce. Why don’t you have him send an email or make him call us about what you want from home. And I’ll get those things for you. How does that sound kid?”
You look up at him, slowly and you hesitantly nod. He ruffles your head and with a smile and says. “‘Atta girl!”
Which makes you smile a bit before your face going blank. He sighs at that and says. “Someone’ll be here to pick you up shortly. And-“
You hear someone running and turn to look where it’s coming from. You see some guy comes running and stops in front of you. He heaves as he holds something familiar under his arm. After he catches his breath he smiles at you before handing you the thing under his arm. A stuffed owl which you immediately recognize as Oliver. He winks at you and then crouches down to your height as he says.
“Hey kid, my name’s Ethan Bennett. Man, you are like a carbon copy of Bruce. Well, except for your eyes, yours are e/c and a lot softer. Shit, where do I even start. Uh, Oh! I’m your uncle, well, not your actual uncle but like, you can consider me as one. I’m a detective under Commissioner Gordon. I’m also your dad’s best friend, I’m not the one here to pick you up, I’m actually still on the clock but uh. This guy,” He says as he holds up Oliver with a smug smile. “Said that he needed to get to you. So I did him a favor. Just
 Don’t tell anyone.”
You take Oliver from his hand and while Jimmy and Uncle Bennett argue you start to tear up again. You hug Oliver tight burying your face in his soft downy chest. Then looking up at Uncle Bennett, you quietly say. “Thank you.” Which he pauses the argument for, before smiling down at you. “You’re welcome, kid. Say how about I wait with you huh? I could show you pictures of your daddy-“
You immediately interrupt. “Not my daddy.”
Ethan looks a bit confused at that, and looks to Jimmy for an explanation. Jimmy shrugs and motions for Uncle Bennett to continue. “Should I call him your dad?”
You nod, confirming that dad is an acceptable choice of words. He chuckles and then continues. “How about I show you pictures of him. So we can.. Condition you to him like a cat.”
You see Jimmy smack Uncle Bennett’s bald head which makes you giggle as Uncle tries to defend himself saying. “What? It’s true! I mean, he’s a big guy, he’s probably gonna scare her. I mean unless you know him, he looks pretty scary. And look at her.”
Uncle says as he gestures to you with both hands. “She’s barely what 4? 5? She looks like a sad wet kitten, Bruce looks like that evil grey bird that looks like it eats puppies compared to her.”
You tilt your head at that. There’s an evil bird? Your father looks like a bird? What does that mean? Your uncle is weird maybe you can get a different one. Jimmy seems like he’d be a good uncle.
They start arguing again and you go back to sit on the bench as they argued. You hold Oliver tightly in your hands and wait, you see them stop arguing with both of them leaving you to wait alone. Or at least that’s what you thought would happen. Until uncle Bennett comes back with some files in hand and some markers and pencils in the other. He sits next to you and says. “Well, I couldn’t get out of work early, but he never said I couldn’t work while I waited with you.”
You smile at him and scooch closer to him as he chuckles. And so the two of you wait. And wait. And wait some more. By 5 you then see an man that looks kinda like a butler being escorted by an officer. You tug on uncle Bennet’s dress shirt before asking. “What do you think he’s in for?”
He looks at you confused before looking up, you see his eyes widen and he starts to burst into laughter. Both the officer and fancy man look confused, and well, so are you.
Your eyes meet with the fancy man’s and his eyes widen and his pupils shrink in shock. He then schools his expression and looks at you with a smile, you shift in your seat feeling a bit uncomfortable with the look in his eyes. The fancy man walks up to you and crouches to your level, he then gently says to you.
“Hello. You must be y/n. My name is Alfred Pennyworth, I’m the butler for the Wayne family. I apologize but your father is not able to pick you up since-“
“What? Alfred what do you mean-“
Then Alfred and uncle Bennett starts talking and kinda arguing. You couldn’t care less though, you have Oliver now! You smile and nuzzle into Oliver’s fluffy chest and then squeeze the little speaker in its wing which plays a recording of your daddy humming his lullaby and then saying. “I love you my little Bubo.” You hold it closer and whisper into its fur. “I love you too daddy.” You hear uncle Bennett’s and Alfred’s argument start to quiet down and you catch uncle saying.
“-how he treats his other kid? Look, even if there was an emergency-“
Alfred sighs as he replies. “No, he does not treat master Dick like this, look. I’m not going to make excuses for him. Master Bruce had his phone on silent for a meeting and so he wasn’t able to answer, then there was Penguin who tried to steal some kind of tech there and you know how they have to follow protocol and whatnot-“
You sigh and look up at Alfred while tugging at his pant leg. They both look down at you and you just ask. “I’m tired. And hungry. I wanna go home. Can you take me home?”
They both look at each other nervously and Alfred takes a breath and says. “I apologize Miss y/n. But, you cannot go home. I understand this is hard for you, and you don’t understand what’s going on. But I, your father and your brother will take care of you. You have my word.”
You want to argue, you wanna fight and yell and say the bad words that your daddy says by accident sometimes. But you’re so small, well, at least you feel small. You’ve never felt this small, well you have, but daddy was there to hug and comfort you. As you look at Alfred, you wish something, anything would just leave your math. Instead all you can say is. “Okay. But I want warm honeyed milk and a bed time story.”
Alfred chuckles at that and nods. You don’t understand why is he laughing, You are completely serious, if you do not have your drink you will throw a tantrum. It’s the least this mysterious man can do after saying that. Alfred, then follows Ethan to go get the paperwork to take you out of the police station and to claim legal rights over you. Meanwhile you tell Oliver about your day, about the scary things that happened. You look at Oliver’s beady eyes and whisper. “I hope my dad likes me. Daddy says I’m a good girl so they’ll like me, I know they will. And even if they don’t, daddy says that some people are just stupid and dumb and don’t deserve to be your friends.”
Alfred comes back with a thick folder of paperwork which you frown at, you don’t like paper. It makes the people you like busy, specifically daddy. You hate when daddy has paperwork. You then look up to Alfred and tug on his pant leg as you whisper up to him. “Do you hate paperwork too?”
He raises an eyebrow at you with a little smile on his face, he takes your hand and starts to lead you out of the police station as you two start to converse. You talk to him about anything that comes to mind. From what you think of paperwork to which Hercules beetle you love the most, to how you peed your pants at the aquarium while you were out in the play area. Alfred had to contain his laughter as you described all of the kids started crying, including you. Finally you arrive at this big building and you look up at it in awe, you then look around at the courtyard and the scary but pretty style of the building. You look up to Alfred and say. “This is like, a bajillion times bigger than my home!”
Before Alfred can stop you, you start running off to the front door giggling and squealing as Alfred tries to catch you. After a few minutes of expertly dodging and wiggling out of his hold like some slippery snake. He catches you and then throws you under his arm which you make a little ‘oof’ sound at.
Alfred then takes you through the foyer and after going through some hallways, which you don’t keep track of, you get to the kitchen. He sits you down at a stool by the kitchen island and says. “Don’t go running off miss y/n we wouldn’t want you to get lost after all.” You sigh and then nod before you stretch and yawn.
Someone comes into the kitchen and says. “Hello Alfred, who’s the kid?” You look at the person talking and see a guy that looks around Alfred’s age and a some teenager following behind him. You try to get off from the stool, now bored out of your mind as Alfred talks to the other man while the teen notices you and goes over to help. He takes you off the stool and says. “What’s your name?”
You look at him dead in the eyes and then slap his thigh and say. “Tag!” You start booking it as you giggle, your game of tag now in session. The teen looks at you with wide eyes and starts to chase after you. Realizing that it was a mistake putting you on the ground. You go into a room and find that it’s a bedroom, you giggle as you put a pillow under the covers to trick the boy and then get under the bed.
He comes rushing in saying. “Hey, this isn’t funny. Come on, if you come out I’ll
 uh, get Alfred to make you cookies? I don’t know. Uh, just come out. I’d rather not have Mr. Wayne or my dad scold me about letting some kid loose in the manor.”
He then sees the trap you laid out for him and as soon as he gets close to the bed you shoot your hands out to grab at his ankles, which makes him scream like a girl and practically jump away like some spider or grasshopper. You start giggling maniacally as he falls on to his butt. You then come out from under the bed as you say. “I got you!” In a sing songy voice as you sit next to him. The teen sighs and stands up, he dusts himself off and says. “Yeah you got-“ and then ambushes you by picking you up from your armpits and says. “Hah! In your face!”
You giggle some more as you whine “No” trying to wiggle out of the teen’s hold. After you calm down you look up at him and ask. “Hi! What’s your name?”
He replies with a small smirk saying. “I’m Luke Fox. And you? What’s your name you little rascal?”
You grin widely, like the Cheshire Cat from Alice in Wonderland and say. “Y/n! And my last name is l/n! Nice to meet you!”
He smiles back and then holds you to his chest and starts to walk back to the kitchen as he says. “So
 Bruce Wayne’s kid huh? I can tell. You look a lot like him. A lot smaller and cuter, but still.”
Your mischievous smile disappears and you instead, bury your face into his chest as you reply. “Yeah. Uncle Bennett said that too. I don’t care, I just want my daddy back.”
Luke looks at you a bit confused and then you explain to him what happened today. All the way from the moment you woke up to just right now. At some point during your retelling of the accounts of today, he stops walking leaving you two just standing in the middle of some hallway. After you finished he looks at you with the same expression those police officers that found you had, the same sad expression that Jimmy and Uncle tried to hide as well. You don’t like how it feels to be looked at like this. It makes your chest kinda heavy and your stomach weird. Luke holds you closer, staying silent for a bit before saying. “My mom makes me this really bomb ass hot cho- Shit I said a- Dammit! Fuck!”
When Luke groans at himself for cussing in front of a literal child you start to giggle. You smile and then tap his shoulder before whispering into his ear. “Daddy swears a lot too. Don’t worry, I won’t tell. Pinky swear!” As she raises her hand and pinky so they can swear on it together.
He chuckles and pinky swears with you, not long after you two enter the kitchen, with you still in his arms. You see that neither the man or Alfred noticed you or Luke were gone. You couldn’t care less however. At least you made your first friend. You then see someone else some into the kitchen, he’s tall and
 Wow. He really does look like you. You wriggle in Luke’s arms, telling him to let you down. Meanwhile Bruce, the person people keep talking about, your supposed father, walks past you and Luke. His focus is on Alfred and Luke’s dad, Luke finally lets you down after teasing you a bit more and you slowly walk over to Bruce. You stare at his face as he talks to the other two men, he had the same spiky eyebrows as you. You’ve never seen someone with the same eyebrows as you.
You shift nervously before patting your clothes and hair down before tugging on his pant leg. You look up at him with a small hopeful smile. Bruce looks down at you and his eyes widen impossibly before he schools his face before giving you a smile, he opens his mouth to say something but you interrupt. “Hello! I am y/n l/n. We look alike! I like your eyes. They look like how mint tastes. Why are you so big? Will I get that big? Do you think I’ll be taller than you?”
He looks at you strangely, a bit surprised and a bit
 Something else? Whatever it is it makes you kinda feel bad and you don’t like that. You fidget as he turns his attention towards Luke’s dad and Alfred. Talking about something else again. You look back at Luke and he looks a bit confused and slightly agitated, he then fixes his face and smiles at you before walking over and saying. “He’s probably just tired or something. How about I make something for you? Sandwich maybe?”
You nod and follow him to the fridge as you look through everything. He shows you some some sandwich ingredients taking the time to show you each one and answering your questions about it. He then makes the sandwich for you, although he’s slightly cringing as you bite into your “abomination sandwich”. Which is what he called your delicious sandwich, and is definitely NOT an abomination. You’re eating at the little island on the stool that’s as big as you and you see another kid walk in. He has black hair and pretty blue eyes, you wave hi and he looks at you confused and a bit judgmental. The kid then asks you. “Who are you?”
You answer back. “Y/n. What’s your name?”
“None of your business.” He replies in a snarky tone.
You look at him, surprised and then glare at him, before you can snap back Luke says. “That’s Dick. He’s gonna be your brother. Kinda. Also, come on Dick. Be nicer.”
Dick huffs and and grumbles “Fine.” before he goes over to the fridge to look through it. He gasp, offended by something. He then glares at you and asks. “Did you finish all the prosciutto? I was gonna have that as a snack, I was saving it for a good day!”
Before Luke can apologize for you, you look at Dick and say. “Well maybe you should’ve had a note on it or something! This is my first day here! I don’t know you people!”
Dick looks you up and down and then marches up to where you’re sitting and nabs half of your sandwich and takes a bite, it only takes a moment before he’s sputtering and coughing because of the overly salty and spicy sandwich. You look on with both anger and slight satisfaction, angry he stole your sandwich and satisfied that he’s in pain. Luke tries to hide a smile as he turns away and hides his trembling mouth with his hand.
The adults then turn to look at you three, wondering what the commotion is. Alfred sighs and goes over to try and calm down Dick while Bruce looks at you disapprovingly. You look at Bruce, offended and stick your tongue and blow a raspberry at him before going back to your sandwich, tearing into the sandwich like you were a hyena and the sandwich was your carcass. Luke chuckles at that before saying. “Come on, don’t be mean. He’s only had Dick for what? Less than a month?”
You look at Luke with appalled face and say. “He isn’t even a real dad?!”
Bruce sighs as he looks down and asks Alfred. “So? What’s the situation with her? And have you-“
You can see Luke looks at Bruce with a weird face, something like a cross of disappointment and disgust before turning to you, and using his body to cover your view of almost everyone in the room. He then says. “Hey, how about we go to the living room? I’ll take you there. We could watch a movie or something? Oh, my dad showed me this movie called Totoro. Or something, you look like you’d live it! Let’s see if I can-“
He starts talking idly, as if to fill in space. When your finished with your sandwich he takes you off the chair and hurriedly walks you out of the kitchen and into the living room. He has you sit close to him so you two could watch it on his phone. You barely get through the first half before his dad comes over to say. “Come on, Luke. It’s time for us to go.” Luke tries to ask for a bit more time. He nudges your shoulder and whispers. “Hey, do some puppy eyes come on.”
What the hell are puppy eyes, you think to yourself before tilting your head at him like a puppy. Luke’s dad rolls his eyes with an affectionate look on his face before saying. “It’s a school night kid. Plus, your mom would kill me if I let you stay out past curfew again.”
Luke throws his head back groans dramatically before saying. “All my other friends can stay out past 8-“
“Well I’m not their parents am I? I’m yours. Now I’ll be waiting in the car for you.” Luke’s dad then turns to you and ruffles your hair before saying. “It was nice to meet you little one. Have a good night.”
You nod at him, and the man nods back before going over to the coatrack, getting his coat and leaving. Luke looks at you with a small pout on his face he sighs before ruffling your hair too, which makes you smile. He then gets up with a groan, just like daddy does. You follow as he also goes to get his coat and hat he then puts on his stuff and says. “Guess I gotta go
 Have a goodnight y/n. Take care of yourself.”
He then gives you a hug before leaving. You yell after him. “Good night Luke! Sleep well!”
He smiles at that and waves at you before getting into his dad’s car, driving off and leaving you in the manor. You go back inside and go back to the living area where you see Alfred. You walk up to him and tilt your head like a curious puppy, waiting for him to announce his intentions. Alfred smiles before he says. “I came to inform you that I have gotten your room ready. On another note, it is time for you to go to bed young lady.”
You put up a hand and in a serious tone of voice you say. “No. You must have forgotten our deal. I want a hot chocolate, a fancy one with cinnamon, heavy cream.”
Alfred raises an eyebrow and asks. “Really? If I recall our agreement was that I’d make you honeyed milk. How strange. I suppose I should get rid of the honeyed milk that I put in your room then?”
You vehemently shake your head and say. “N-No! That’s fine! I’ll drink it! It’s mine! You can’t take it back!”
Alfred then lets out a hum of consideration. “If you say so. Now come along. I must tuck you in before the hour.”
This man speaks funny. You like it. You then try to imitate him using the fanciest words you know, like anemone and hypertension. He laughs but you’re not sure whether it’s because of the accent or because you probably used the words wrong. Anyways he brings you to your new room and you gasp at how big it is, you hurriedly take off your shoes and put them right next to the door before you run straight for the bed and climb on to it, it’s so soft!
You then notice the hot milk on the bedside table, you crawl over and sit on the edge of the bed so you can take a sip. You sigh in delight at the taste, the milk is nice and creamy with a hint of vanilla and cinnamon as well as some honey to make it sweet. You yawn and get off the bed so you can walk over to Alfred. “Thank you, it’s really yummy. Can I have some pajamas now? I’m sleepy and so is Oliver-“
You then realize that you don’t have Oliver in your arms, and you can’t remember where you put him. Your eyes become blurry as tears fill your vision, you look up at Alfred and whine. “Where’s Oliver? I can’t remember where he is.. Can you help me find him?”
Alfred opens his mouth to say something but a beep comes from his phone, he sighs and says. “I will bring him soon, just lie down and-“
You interrupt him saying. “No! He’s always there when I sleep! I need him, if my daddy isn’t gonna be here then I need Oliver to be here at least!” You don’t like how Alfred is trying to hurry things up. You don’t like that daddy’s not here, you don’t like how Oliver’s not here, you hate that your favorite people are leaving and you HATE everything about this day. Sure you met new and nice people, but you want Daddy. You want him to kiss your face and tickle your tummy and hug you. You start sobbing and pulling on your h/c hair and trying your best to not choke on air.
Alfred looks at you sadly and then sighs, he then gets on one knee and says. “Miss y/n. Please stop. I will get Oliver for you, I will be right back. I promise. I will return with your dear Oliver and some old pajamas.”
You look back at him and nod as you sniffle. You sit on your bed and sip on your warm milk while Alfred leaves to go get Oliver and some pajamas. You wait, and wait. and wait some more. But he never comes. You accidentally fall asleep, finished with your drink and more tired than you’ve ever felt. That’s when you realized, no one’s gonna take care of you like daddy, no one’s gonna tuck you in, kiss your tears away, or any of the other things he used to do. You curl up and cry softly in the early morning light, mourning the loss of your father. Something that you didn’t know was possible until it happened.
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I hope you like it! I already have the next few chapters planned so it will be angst for the next 3 or 4 chapters :)))
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just-a-sewer-goblin · 3 days ago
Text
Collars Of Duty 5
MalinoisHybrid!Simon x reader Chapter 4 - (Chapter 6) Finally reunited again, Simon attacked you as soon as you met. Will this be the breaking point for you or can you work through it and help you both. ~ 8,8k words Content (might contain spoilers): biting, blood, attack, hybrid AU, mentions of torture, medical inaccuracies
A.N: I'm sorry it took so long. I'm pretty slow with updates. I hope you enjoy it. Although I am currently at the I hate it stage but I decided that I should consider it as good enough as it is. Enjoy. Also I suck at spelling so feel free to point out mistakes.
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It’s absurd how the seconds stretch until they feel like minutes. The pain is excruciating but you can’t look away from Simon’s face. Your arm feels like it’s on fire, the stinging and burning sensation racing through it until you think you can’t bear it anymore and yet you have the mind to think about it. Instead of instinctively slapping at Simon or kicking him you stare. Is it normal to think this rationally in a moment like this?
It’s like your frozen in time. Neither of you moving, his vicious fangs embedded in your arm. His face is still scrunched up in a threatening display but you catch the flickering hint of fear glinting in his eyes. It makes you want to comfort him and you think you might be stupid, wanting to comfort a hybrid that’s hurting you.
Steps slowly draw closer and when you look to the side you catch sight of Nate’s lower body. He’s carefully, stealthily coming closer. In his hand that’s resting at his side he holds a syringe, thumb ready to empty the liquid into Simon.
It’s most likely filled with a sedative and instinctively you throw your free arm out and over Simon’s neck protectively. He flinches at the sudden movement , driving his teeth deeper into your arm and you wince at the way the movement rips at your flesh. A new wave of pain crashes through you and you can’t hold back a slight groan. Nate steadily creeps closer and Simon’s eyes widen with growing awareness at what’s about to happen.
“No.” You try to command Nate but it comes out like more of a pained wheeze. Still he stops sedative at the ready.
Simon’s eyebrows furrow his eyes flickering between yours, confused. He does not yield his hold on your arm and you breathe deeply through the pain. You wish it would just stop hurting.
“I need to sedate him, he’s dangerous.” Nate says resolutely.
“No!” You manage a bit louder. It might be only a feeling that makes you stop him but if Simon gets sedated right now it will only make things worse. Sure it will save you from this moment but you won’t be able to process it and work through it. It will be just like Phillip. Well maybe not exactly like it since Simon’s isn’t mauling you right now. He’s only nibbling on you. You almost make yourself crack up into hysterical giggles with that thought. His teeth hurt just as much as Phillips did. They’re just as sharp. But they’re not moving.
Forcefully removing Simon from you won’t truly help, you’re sure of it. Simon will freak when he wakes back up and you’ll be left with this memory of him. Attacking you, biting you. Even though his fangs are still sunken into your flesh the old scar in your shoulder throbs and you feel like laughing. Maybe you’re slowly going crazy from the pain. It seems to be everywhere.
Your head hurts where it cracked against the floor but you concentrate on Simon’s shallow breath. The way he holds your arm in his teeth. He’s not actively biting deeper and you consciously relax your body under him. Maybe it’s abnormal the way you assess the situation, thinking it through instead of fighting the large hybrid. But you can’t help but be thankful for it.
“It’s okay, Simon.” You say gently and watch his eyebrows shoot up in surprise. His growling stutters and maybe you imagine it but a hint of a whine builds up in his throat. He’s aware of you. You’re not sure why he hasn’t let go yet, but you’re determined to get this under control. With your current pain level you can still talk and think so maybe there’s a way for you to do this right, to do right by him.
“I know. I should have known better than to rush towards you. I don’t like that either. Forgive me for scaring you.” You continue on just following your instinct. Simon’s face betrays his surprise.
He huffs through his nose and looks at you almost pleadingly. What he’s pleading for, you don’t know. The aggression is gone but the fear in his eyes hurts almost as much as his bite.
“I know. I know. You didn’t mean it.” You’re not even sure what you’re saying but you don’t stop talking to him. His saliva pools on your skin, hot and sticky, or maybe it’s just your blood.
When his breaths get quicker and you decide to be more daring. Speaking helps but it’s not enough. The sight of the large hybrid evidently distressed breaks your heart. He’s growing more distressed by the second.
You need to try something. Anything. Slowly you move the arm that you protectively threw around his neck until you can lower your hand onto the back of his head. Burying your fingers in his hair carefully. It’s just a gentle brush of your fingers through his hair but a sudden wail tears from his chest like you hit him.
Once again it sinks his teeth deeper into your arm and you grit your own teeth against the pain. This has to work. You don’t know what to do if it doesn’t work and the pain is slowly fraying your nerves.
“I know. Shhh. It’s okay. You didn’t mean to, did you? I just spooked you. Nothing bad is going to happen. I won’t let them sedate you. I’m here now, Simon. Like you asked. Like you wanted.”
Once again you card your fingers through his hair, only a whisper of a touch until you reach the base of his left ear. He howls like he’s being ripped apart. Your eyes fill with tears. Maybe you should stop. Are you actually hurting him? But he shouldn’t have a wound on the back of his head. Your touch shouldn’t hurt him.
His eyes are wide and frightful but his jaw slackened lightly. Not hurting him then. Good, you have to continue.
“You can let go, Simon. You’re safe. I’ll keep you safe. You’re okay. I won’t even look if you don’t want me to.” The things you say barely make sense but you can’t stop, not when the hold he has on your arm loosens some more until his teeth are merely resting against your bloody skin. You’re not delusional enough to think he won’t bite down again at the sign of any threat so you keep holding still under him.
The base of his ear is unbelievable soft under your fingers as you rub it and he pants harshly against your arm an entire war happening behind his eyes. Another broken whine raises in his throat and you smile up at him. It’s wobbly and not really all that convincing but a smile non the less.
“No one will look at you. I’ll make sure you’re safe. We’re okay. I promise. It’s okay. You can let go. Nothing will happen.”
You swallow down the pain and nerves addressing Nate. “Right? You won’t sedate him. It’s okay. He’s okay.”
You cannot see Nate's face from your position but he shuffles a few steps back, clearing his throat. “Yeah uhm. Sure?”
Simon’s eyes search yours and ever so slowly he widens his jaw, his wet and warm tongue laving over the bite mark once, his breath cool against the wet skin when he whimpers. Some of the tightness in your chest dissipates as the pain lessens just the tiniest bit.
“There you go. You’re doing so well, Simon. You can relax. Will you let me sit up?”
He takes in your expression, scanning your face for something and you patiently wait. Slowly he pulls his head back until your arm is safe from his teeth. Then he closes his mouth warily. You match his pace and as he slowly retreats from over you, you push yourself up, wincing when you put your weight on your arm.
Finally you’re sitting in front of him, cross legged and he watches you for a long moment. He’s subtly shaking and you attempt to smile at him again but all it does it make the tears spill over. Still you push through even if you can’t see his expression properly through the blur. Smiling almost hurts.
“Well done, Simon.”
The sight or the words make something snap and he lunges forward. You violently flinch, throwing your arms up again freezing when you suddenly have a lap full of malinois hybrid. His big arms are wrapped tightly around your middle and his face is pressed into your stomach while he half lays on you, his shaking growing stronger.
“Sorry. I’m sorry.” He’s shivering so hard your entire body is rocking with it. “Sorry, sorry, sorry.” Your arms are still raised while he falls apart against you and you lower them slowly until you touch him. One hand presses on his back, which makes him in turn jump and bury his face harder against your stomach. The other hand finds his head again, petting him. He speaks through pained whimpers. “Forgive me. Sorry.”
You don’t know how long you sit there on the floor, your arm bleeding freely, soaking his shirt and your pants with your blood but at some point he stops shaking, stops apologizing through whimpers and simply holds onto you quietly. You don’t stop petting him through it all.
Nate is already looking at you when you look up at him. His eyes are wide, stressed and his tongue doesn’t stop tasting the air of the room. Your tears have run dry and your mouth curves up into a real smile.
“You’re insane.” He softly remarks into the quiet of the room but it doesn’t sound like an insult.
You blink at him slowly, protectively tightening your arms around Simon, drawing him in closer. He stiffens at that and then relaxes again. He’s awake, just not speaking anymore.
“Can you bring me something for my wounds?” You ask Nate and he looks at you long and hard in disapproval.
“You should go see a medical professional about it.” He advises and Simon curls more tightly around you his arms pressing him closer until his hold is almost painful. A second later he starts to extract himself from you, like he realizes what he just did but you hold him tight and he goes lax in your lap again.
“I’ll take care of the worst myself. I’ll see someone about it later.”
Nate shakes his head. “I don’t want to leave you alone with him not when
”
“I’m fine. You’ll be quick, right?” You interrupt gently. He nods but seems unconvinced. “Go Nate, or do you want me to lose more blood?” You ask with an almost teasing tone and he shakes his head again but begins moving.
“You’re insane.” He repeats and then he’s gone.
Your back starts cramping from sitting in your position for so long. Tenderly you stoke Simon’s hair. “Hey, big guy. Do you think we can move to the wall? Sitting like this is a little straining.”
He loosens his grip and it’s entirely ridiculous how you two scoot over the floor without changing the position you’re in until your back rests against the wall. You sigh with relief, relaxing some and your back stops screaming. That only making the uncomfortable pulsing of the wound in your arm more prominent.
Thank god that you have all the vaccines for dog hybrid bites. Courtesy of working with them and having been bitten not too long ago. Simon raises his head and you hold your breath. Somehow you expected him to cry but there’s no sign of it on his face. It’s dry and expressionless. He looks at your face, then your arm and slowly sits back up, examining it.
That’s how Nate finds you. He’s wary as he steps closer eying Simon like he’ll attack him any second and extends his hand with the little first aid kit towards you. You take it. Before you go to open it, Simon’s hand covers yours and you recoil like he bit you again, looking at him in shock.
His face is unreadable. “Let me?” He says it like a question and you nod mutely, watching him as his big hands open the kit and he gets started on cleaning the wounds.
Your heart jumps at every touch even though his movements are slow and steady. His big hands are surprisingly gentle as he takes care of the bite mark he put on you with practiced ease. Looking to Nate in bewilderment you catch him with his sight locked on Simon attentively. His tongue darts out every now and then but decidedly less hectic than before.
When he catches your stare he presses his lips together and you notice he’s still holding the syringe. Quietly you look at his face and then pointedly at the sedative and shake your head. He sighs audibly and Simon tenses again, like he’s bracing for something, even though he seems concentrated on wrapping your wounds.
You relax some more when Nate caps the needle. Simon raises your arm inspecting the stark white wrapping and the lets go, scooting back a bit and out of your personal space. Once again you’re locked into a staring match. Nate silently watches you two.
Soon enough the silence gets unbearable, uncomfortable and finally you need to say something, anything or you’ll implode.
“Hi.”
Simon’s expression settles back into a frown. Not in a talking mood it seems. Somehow that makes you grin. It brings you back to when he first woke up in the hospital.
“I just arrived. I wanted to see you as soon as possible and Nate was kind enough to take me to you.”
You give Nate a blinding smile and the snake hybrid shakes his head again. “You’re either insane or a saint.”
“I’m taking that as a compliment. Anyway, Simon, are you ready to move into our rooms with me? We have two rooms next to each other.” You offer and Nate takes half a step forward. Simon tracks the other hybrids movements out of the corners of his eyes.
“Now hold on. That’s nice and all but not happening. At least not today. I have to report the biting. If this was just about your relationship I wouldn’t object but we can’t move Simon into a populated wing if we don’t know for sure he won’t be a danger to everyone.”
 You can’t exactly argue with that, even if you’d like to. It makes sense and you just arrived. Maybe you missed something about Simon’s behavior that could be a threat. Even if you don’t think he is. He is pretty much exactly as you remember him. Although you have to admit to yourself that there’s some lingering fear at being in Simon’s presence, that wasn’t there before. You push it back down.
His attack was maybe a bit extreme but once again not the actions of a savage. If your judgement isn’t completely off, then it was simply an instinctive reaction to feeling threatened.
“Alright, I understand. Then
” You look around the barely furnished room. It reminds you a lot of ‘the cell’ at Rehybrid except it has an actual bed, a desk and chair and a door that leads to what you’d assume is a bathroom. Although the bare furniture is bolted into place as you notice.
“Simon.” You address the hybrid and his ears twitch in your direction. “Would you like me to stay the night here or go back to my room and come back tomorrow?”
You can see Nate open his mouth and level him with a flat stare which makes him promptly snap it shut. Simon cocks his head at you.
“He has a medical examination really early tomorrow, it’s more convenient if you
” Nate starts after all but Simon’s sudden and vicious growl makes him shut up.
You jerk around to look at the malinois hybrid. His expression is all threat again and aimed at Nate, his ears drawn back and fear clogs your throat. Maybe he is more aggressive than you thought. Maybe you’re a stupid softy and shouldn’t trust your judgement too much.
But except for the earlier attack he was relatively docile up to now. And his aggression isn’t aimed at you which makes it easier to judge with a level head.
Something isn’t right. He wouldn’t react like that for no reason.
“As his handler, I’d like to be present for that.” You state and Simon’s head whips back around to you his growl dying down his ears perking back up.
Nate sighs and drags his hands over his face. “Alright.” He glances between you and Simon and his face relaxes. “It’s getting late and I just want to go to bed. I’m getting irritated at all this because I’m so tired so stay or go back to your room but I need to sleep soon or I’ll pass out on you two or get mad and I don’t want that.”
You search his face and suddenly it hits you how obviously exhausted Nate looks. With everything that happened you didn’t pay any close attention to him. Sheepishly you look down and then at Simon again. It’s his call to make so you await his answer.
You two lock eyes for what feels like an eternity and finally you get to hear his rumbled reply.
“Stay.”
You nod your heart suddenly speeding up again but it’s not fear this time and you address Nate. “I’m staying here. Don’t worry about my stuff, I’ll take care of it tomorrow. Just go to bed Nate. I’ll be fine.”
The snake hybrid clearly has more on his mind but he doesn’t voice any of it, studying Simon and you who are still on the ground. A big yawn makes him finally leave for good but not before giving you his number so you can call in case anything happens.
The door clicks shut behind him and you’re alone with Simon.
Well, that was some reunion. You sigh deeply and let your body relax. Now that it’s just you two some of your nervousness returns and you have to remind yourself that Simon apologized for attacking you earlier. He also bandaged your wounds for you and had a breakdown in your lap so the chances of him attacking you to prove something are slim to none.
You’re glad you stopped Nate from sedating him. But even if everything went well in the end it doesn’t mean that your wounds aren’t rubbed raw. Now you try to hold all the ugly feelings that try to resurface down with rationality.
“Will you tell me what the growling was for when Nate mentioned tomorrow? What happened? Why did I get requested?” You find yourself asking. Skirting around the topic isn’t your thing and you need to know if you want a chance to do your job well.
Simon clears his throat and finally you can look him over calmly and actually take note of how his wounds look. The cuts on his face are mostly healed, leaving thin pink scars behind some still have a bit of crusting. You can’t exactly see the other wounds right now but his fingers aren’t in a cast anymore. Now they’re only taped together in a way that prevents him from using them too much and separately from each other.
“I trust you.” Simon says and that simple sentence slams into you like a sledgehammer. It makes you swallow against your tight throat and you blink a few times.
“What happened?” You ask again after collecting yourself and he huffs.
“Nothing.”
You raise one eyebrow unimpressed. “Oh really. Nothing has your hackles raised like that?”
He bares his teeth in frustration, gritting them and the sight has you leaning away from him slightly. He notices and lowers his lips looking at the floor.
“Nothing that warrants a reaction like mine.” He continues and you hum.
When he doesn’t go on further you gently encourage: “Listen Simon. I’m here for you. I came here to help you to be on your team. But if you want me to be able to do that you have to explain things to me so I know how to protect you best.”
He barks an unamused harsh laugh at that and you watch him as he stops and crumbles into himself, quieting down. “I should not need protection. I’m a soldier.”
Slowly, carefully you inch closer to his seated form. “I’m not talking about your strength. You’ve been MIA for months Simon. Whatever happened, you’re allowed to be affected by it. You’re allowed to be hurt and need help. It doesn’t make you weak or any less of a soldier to need help getting back on your feet. But I won’t know how to do that if you don’t speak to me.”
He looks back up and something in his face softens. He nervously licks his lips and begins forcing out words. “I was cuffed for the transport. As soon as I was here they wanted to do a medical exam. I was overwhelmed. I refused. They sedated me. But I was awake, I guess it only sedated my body not my mind. I was unable to move as they poked and prodded me, examined me. No one talked to me.” He shudders.
His explanation is short but it chokes you up and makes you clench your fist in anger at the same time. These fools. Fucking idiots and assholes. You start shaking and Simon looks at you concerned, notices your unshed tears and shakes his head.
“I don’t want your pity.” He almost snarls and if you weren’t so angry you’d flinch but your rage overshadows any other emotion, fills you to your fingertips until you don’t know where to put it anymore.
“I’m not pitying you.” You bite out and then breathe deeply to calm down. No need to raise your voice at him. “I’m angry.”
Simon jerks back, away from you and you quickly go on. “Angry at them! Your reaction is completely justified. I.... fuck I’m so mad I want to punch someone.”
That gets an actual laugh out of Simon and it startles you right out of your angry state. Genuine amusement dances in his light brown eyes and you can’t help but smile back. He has a nice laugh. It’s rough and very him.
“Do you even know how to throw a proper punch?” He teases and you lift your chin in mock offense.
“Of course I do.” You say your head held high. Simon chuckles warmly at that and you can’t help but grin at him. Some of the earlier heaviness finally lifting from the room.
A comfortable quiet settles over you two after that. The amusement lingers for a moment.
“I’m coming with you tomorrow. Just give me a sign if you’re uncomfortable. I’ll make sure they take it slow. I won’t let them touch you without your permission.” You say. It’s a promise.
“I didn’t mean to bite you.” Another hidden apology.
You look down at your neatly wrapped arm. It makes sense for him to be able to do basic first aid but you’re still surprised at how well and quick he did it. You shrug, your hand gently stroking over the bandages.
“I know that now. It’s not like it’s the first time either. I’ve had worse.”
A small growl builds in his chest but this time you manage to keep the fear back. It’s just a reaction to what you said. Not you. “What do you mean you’ve had worse?”
Instinctively your hand comes up to your shoulder pressing against the permanently scarred skin. Somehow that’s the scar you always go for as if it’s the only one Phillip left on you.
“Nothing important. You’re just not the first hybrid who bit me.” You try to keep it vague and you can see his eyes narrow but he doesn’t push. You’re not sure whether you’re relieved or disappointed.
Pointedly you look around the room taking in the little furniture. A small smirk settles on your lips as you look at Simon. “There is only one bed.”
Immediately a louder growl starts up in his chest and your smile vanishes. Okay that is definitely aimed at you and fear sinks it’s claws into your neck. “Hey, hey. I was only teasing. I will sleep on the floor. Don’t worry.”
He swallows down the threatening noise and looks to the side almost like he’s embarrassed by his own reaction. “No. You can have the bed.”
You shake your head and scoff. “Yeah right. I’ll take the bed when you’re the one still healing.”
His eyebrows furrow and you realize that that seems to be the expression he wears most of the time. He licks his lips his ears flickering up and down as if he doesn’t know what to express.
“We could share.” He says it so self assured you wouldn’t think he’s nervous about it if it wasn’t for his ears and his earlier growl.
“Only if you’re comfortable.” Your voice leaves no room for arguments.
He’s quiet for a long time mulling it over, frowning at the bed, and you almost tell him that you’ll sleep on the floor either way. When you open your mouth he grits out: “Don’t touch me.”
His tone is aggressive and not even a real answer but you simply nod. “I won’t. We can build a barrier out of the blanket, that way I can’t accidentally knock into you in the night. But only if you want that. I have no problem with sleeping on the floor.”
He doesn’t answer but he gets up and tugs the blanket off the bed. Silently he waits next to it and you guess that’s your sign to get in and sleep next to the wall. You’re not sure how you feel about the prospect of being caged between Simon’s large form and the wall but that’s probably the reason why Simon won’t slip in first.
You take off your shoes and crawl onto the mattress. The bed is obviously not meant for two so you press as close to the wall as you can. Simon puts one knee on the bed and then proceeds to spread the blanket over you in a surprisingly gentle gesture. Then he piles the rest next to you so it acts as a barrier.
For a moment he just looks at his work, then he grumbles something to himself, turns down the lights and gets in next to you. You note that he doesn’t turn the light off completely but that’s just fine by you. You prefer being able to see him and his intentions.
The quiet is tense but you don’t know what to say anymore so you just lay there staring at the ceiling and wait for sleep to claim you. It doesn’t help that your inner clock thinks it’s early evening.
Finally you can’t keep laying still like that and turn onto your side, craning your neck to look at Simon’s profile over the blanket barrier he build. His eyes are closed but you’re pretty sure he’s not asleep. His chest raises and falls too quickly for that and you watch the rhythm for a moment until it registers that he gave you the blanket.
“I’m not cold. You can have the blanket.” You whisper in case you’re wrong and he is asleep after all.
His eyes open and he keeps them on the ceiling. “Don’t need it. I run hot.”
You nod to yourself and tuck your knees in close so you don’t accidentally brush against him. Head relaxing back against the pillow so you’re left staring at the blanket. It takes forever but finally you do succumb to sleep.
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You wake in the middle of the night with a gasp, sitting upright. You’re glad the light is on so you can see everything and your hand finds your painfully throbbing shoulder. It seems to have it’s own heartbeat and it’s beating in tandem with the new bite wound on your arm.
Guilty you look down at Simon’s stretched out form to find his golden eyes already fixed on you. “I’m sorry if I woke you.”
He shakes his head and continues to watch as you press your hand to your chest and do your breathing exercise to calm back down. You don’t like that he sees you like this. Not when he signed for you to be his handler. You’re supposed to be his rock and have authority. Can he even take you serious when he gets to see you struggle like this?
Nothing on his face gives away what he thinks as you slowly find back to your own body. You check the barrier between you two and find it intact. You can’t help the sigh of relief that you let out at that and you catch the slightest movement of Simon’s ears.
Happy to escape his scrutinizing gaze you lay back down and once again you’re left staring at the blankets. How you wish you could reach out and touch him, reassure yourself and him but he asked you not to so you tuck your hands in close to your chest and close your eyes.
Movement of the fabric has you opening them again. You turn your head and see Simon peek over the barrier. He offers no comment but carefully arranges the blanket back over your body. In your panicked state you had thrown it off you. Again without so much as brushing his fingers against you. Once he’s satisfied that you’re covered properly he lays back down and you find yourself snuggling more into the blanket, pressing just the tiniest bit closer to the barrier. If you concentrate enough you can imagine that his warmth seeps through the thick fabric and settles around you.
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You wake in the morning to a strange pressure against your front. It’s comforting but confusing because the blanket barrier shouldn’t be this unyielding. Your open eyes and don’t see anything besides the pristine white of the cover for a moment until your realize that you can see Simon’s shoulder rise and fall mere centimeters from you.
Now you’re wide awake, your breath hitching. The blanket is still firmly in place between the two of you and no part of you touches but Simon is curled up on his side too, pressed against the blanket just like you and although it separates you two you can feel his chest rising and falling against it. You can feel his legs against yours through it and for a second you think about getting up and putting as much distance between you and his sleeping form as possible.
A moment later you almost laugh at yourself while heat spreads through your cheeks. You crane your neck trying to see if Simon’s head peeks over the top of the barrier. It does.
Your eyes lock and you exhale on a rush. He’s awake.
Neither of you move and you can hear you blood rushing in your ears at his proximity. You’re sure if it weren’t for the thick cover between you you’d die of a heart attack. How his closeness can be stifling and comforting at once is a mystery to you but you don’t move either. Maybe it’s because you’re frozen in fear.
But the beat of your heart doesn’t spell out fear.
“Good morning.” You whisper. Instead of an answer the pressure against your front increases for a moment, then he rolls away from you and sits up, rubbing his palms over his tired face.
You find yourself doing the same and checking the time. It’s ridiculous how early you woke up but Simon’s already on his feet, tension in the harsh lines of his body and stretches for a moment his ears pressing flat against his head at his big yawn and you can’t help but smile. Definitely cute despite his size.
He catches your expression and seems confused. Instead of offering an explanation you fondly shake your head and get up too. Both of you silently wash up in the bathroom. It’s comfortable and you find only the faintest traces of yesterdays fear left in you. Somehow Simon manages to put you at ease, despite his attack.
It’s not long before Nate appears. He opens the door slowly and peeks inside. Once he sees you the relief is visible on his face and he steps in fully.
“Thank god, I was worried I’d find you in shreds.”
The way he says it so earnestly makes you giggle and Simon’s almost always present frown deepens. “It’s time for Simon to go to the doctor’s.”
Simon’s entire demeanor changes and he backs up against a corner. His lips peel back and Nate’s expression turns sad.
He opens the door wider and two more men step in. Apparently they also work at the center. One holds a muzzle the other one a collar and a leash and Nate once again has a sedative in hand. Your eyes widen and you step in front of Simon, very aware of him snarling behind you. Putting yourself between him and the men is probably stupid especially since you can’t see what he’ll do next but you can’t have them adding to his stress.
You raise your hands placatingly. “Gentlemen, please. This is hardly necessary.”
One of the guys scoffs. “Tell that to him. He’s not allowed out of this room without leash and muzzle but he won’t put it on. There is no other way. I sure as hell won’t suffer another attack from him. And we don’t have the time for discussions.”
Now it’s your turn to frown almost scowling at them. “Surely you can spare a few more minutes if it’s for the sake of one of the hybrids who’s supposed to heal here?” You say, some venom seeping into your tone.
You’re aware that you’re new here and hardly endearing yourself to your presumed co-workers but you’re here for Simon. Not for them. They roll their eyes but stay back and you mull over your options.
“Leave the leash and muzzle here and out. All of you.” You say in a commanding voice that you’re pretty sure you have no right to wield. Yet they listen and you catch Nate taste the air and nod at you a slight smile on his lips.
When the door closes you turn on your heels and meet Simon’s angry expression.
“You don’t want the leash and muzzle?” You question, voice soft once again.
He shakes his head his canines still exposed and you remember how they ripped at your flesh. The phantom pain shoots through your entire body this time and you square your shoulders. It’s time to be his handler. You don’t have the luxury of wallowing in self pity.
“I’m afraid there is no way around it at this point in time.” He straightens up further and his growl redoubles.
You raise your hands. “Simon listen to me.” He’s staring through you, he’s probably not really listening, trapped somewhere in his racing thoughts so you raise your voice slightly. “Simon!”
He starts, his ears coming forward for a moment before he goes back to his aggressive stance.
“I do not want them to hurt you. But I need you to let the doctor check up on you. I promise I will not let anything bad happen. I promise I will protect you. But if you want anything to go differently than before you’ll have to take the muzzle and leash.” You explain. You hate that there is no other way. You just arrived, you have no idea how necessary the check up is and you can’t refuse on his behalf when you don’t know whether he’s healed enough.
He considers you, hatred in his eyes and you try not to let it burn you. It’s such a heavy contrast to the way he looked at you earlier when he peeked at your over the cover. It’s such a difference to when you’re alone in a safe little bubble you two get to design by yourselves.
You exhale heavily and take the leash and muzzle in hand before turning back to Simon. He eyes the two devices like they’re meant to torture him.
You hold up the muzzle, showing it to him and he physically steps back. Instead of going after him, you open the muzzle at the back. “Look. This is how you get it open. It’s designed so you can take it off yourself. No one can force you to keep it on. It’s meant as a helpful device to keep you from hurting others in a stressful moment because often the biting happens on instinct and hybrids regret it afterwards.”
His eyes flicker down to your bandaged arm and then fixate back on the muzzle.
“I won’t even need to touch you to put it on. You can do it yourself.” You continue in the softest voice you can muster. Then you show him the leash. He doesn’t retreat further but the fire in his eyes burns even brighter.
You show him how the collar can be opened and closed. “You can also put this on yourself. I will not let anyone else hold the leash.”
It’s kind of pointless, you know he doesn’t want you to hold the leash just as much as he doesn’t want the men in front of the door to hold it. But at least you’ll hold it softly.
You hold the leather leash up. “I will not yank on it or choke you with it. I will only hold it so we’re connected and I can keep you from getting hurt. I will lead you with a gentle hand and never towards harm.”
Silence falls over the room and you realize that he stopped growling during your explanation. You said what you could, now it is up to him. You can feel your pulse thrum in your neck a silent plea. Please trust me. Let me lead you. Let me show you it can be different than what you experienced so far.
You offer it all to him in your outstretched hands and wait. There is nothing else you can do besides ask him to comply. Sure you’re the authority but only if Simon wants you to be. You hope he remembers that he signed the handler-hybrid papers first. You hope he remembers that he said he trusts you.
His legs carry him towards you and your breath hitches. There’s sweat on his forehead and you stay still as a statue while he takes the muzzle. Carefully he opens and closes the latch a few times, making sure it’s easy to operate. Then he slips it over his face locks and unlocks it at least five more times before he fastens it. His chest heaves with harsh pants as he takes the leash from your hands next and you lower them slowly so you don’t spook him.
Once again he tests the buckle and then fastens the collar around his neck. You notice that he left plenty of room which is technically not how he’s supposed to wear it but you decide not to address it.
His eyes find you but they’re slightly unfocused and you speak to him again. “Well done, Simon. Thank you.”
He jerks back at your words his eyes wide and his panting stops. You’re not sure whether it’s the praise or the fact you expressed gratitude but you leave it at that.
Slowly you hold out your hand, waiting for him to place the leash in your hold instead of taking it up yourself. It looks comically thin in his large palm as he grabs the end and clenches his fist around it. Patiently you wait giving him what you hope is a reassuring smile.
Tensing up even more he places the end in your hand and plants his feet as if he expects you to jerk him forward. Loosely you curl your own fist around the leather and let your arm rest relaxed against your side. The grin you gift him with feels silly with how bright it is but you’re incredibly proud of the big hybrid.
“Follow me.” You softly command testing how he’ll react to you expecting him to follow your words without making it a request. To your surprise he easily falls into step, walking towards the door and waits patiently when you open it.
You stay in front of him and address the men in the corridor who stare at the both of you like you suddenly grew multiple heads. “Do not touch him and stay in front of us, leading the way.”
Nate recovers first, grinning widely and in his slightly reptilian face it looks almost evil. “I knew it.” He hisses delighted and turns to lead the way, the two other guys following behind not even arguing with you at this point.
Simon walks behind you and you turn to him without halting your footsteps. “Come here. Next to me.”
His long legs eat the distance and he walks along beside you, the leash hanging loosely between you. Simon’s face is set into a frown and there’s still sweat beading at his hairline but his breathing is at a frequency that doesn’t worry you and you hum in satisfaction. The ear closest to you swivels towards the sound for a second.
It doesn’t take long until you’re in the doctors office and it makes you feel slightly ridiculous that you have two grown men in addition to Nate accompany you. The doctor gapes at you and Simon, eyes comically wide while looking between you two and the way the large hybrid follows your lead.
She stands up gives you a curt hello and snaps on latex gloves. “Let’s get this over with.”
You frown at her tone and as soon as she stands up Simon starts growling, like a ferocious beast, backing up a bit. The doctor sighs and nods at the men who accompanied you. “Sedate him.”
You straighten up. “Don’t!” You command. The men look between you and the doctor unsure who to listen to. Narrowing you eyes you take a small step in front of Simon. “There is no need to sedate him.”
She clicks her tongue at you and rests her weight on one leg, pushing out her hip. “You’re his new handler? You arrived when? Yesterday? I know how to treat my patients now step aside and let us do our damn job.”
Her tone almost makes you want to cower, not one for confrontation, but you remind yourself why you’re here. “I do not mean to disrespect but I brought him here of his own free will without any need for sedation so I’d really appreciate it if we could work together to make sure my charge is comfortable during the examination.”
She almost scoffs at you and takes a step closer, Simon flinches and you hold out your hand, stopping her from taking another step. Way to go. It’s your first day and you’re already pissing of personnel you’re supposed to work with. But you cannot let it slide, not with the way Simon reacts. After what he told you, you’re certain that there is a reason for it.
“You’re the one who isn’t working with me. So step aside and let me do my job. A job you know nothing about.” Her tone is sharp, biting and it makes your hand itch to slap the arrogance out of her.
You square your shoulders and gather all the leftover confidence you can find in your body. “No. Not when my charge is uncomfortable. Are there any other doctors at this center or do we have to find one who doesn’t work here?” You calmly answer and her mouth drops open.
Something flashes in her eyes and before she can respond Nate steps forward placatingly lifting his hands. “Hey now. It’s a perfectly reasonable and normal request. Yes there are other doctors. We’ll ask for someone else.”
The Doctor grits her teeth in displeasure but doesn’t argue against Nate and you raise your brows. Interesting. Nate seems to be in a position of authority. Breed wise he’d be supposed to be a companion hybrid. But he evidently works here and holds a higher position than some humans.
His hand finds your shoulder and squeezes briefly. Then he escorts the doctor out of the room, telling you he’ll be back soon with someone else.
The door closes behind the two of them and you’re left with Simon and the other two guys. You exhale heavily, your shoulders dropping and turn to Simon. His shirt is soaked with sweat on his chest but now that the doctor left he seems to slowly come back to himself.
Honey coloured eyes regard you as you ask him if he’s okay. The nod is slow but enough to reassure you and you don’t have to wait for long until the door opens again and Nate steps in with a middle-aged man. His hair is black and brushed back, some stray grays at his temples but his face is so kind it immediately puts you at ease.
“Welcome. You must be his new handler. I’m glad you could make it. Please take a seat. I’m Doctor Graham.”
You stay on your feet but give him a friendly smile and a nod. Mentally you pat your back for standing your ground because Simon’s staying quiet, seemingly not as stressed by him. “Yes. I’m happy I can be here. What’s the plan for today's exam?”
At that word Simon shifts on his feet. You wish you could put a reassuring hand on his shoulder but he doesn’t want you to touch him, so you don’t.
“I need to check his wounds for inflammation and their status of healing.”
You nod and the doctor gestures at the examination table. You look at Simon and try to seem as reassuring as possible. “Go on, sit down.”
It surprises you anew when he listens and parks himself on the table. The doctor blinks owlishly at the scene and something akin to gratification spreads in your chest. Look at this, look at what a well behaved hybrid he is and look how wrong you all judged him, you think grimly.
“Please take your shirt off, Simon.” The doc asks and to your surprise Simon looks at you his head slightly tilted.
The weight of his questioning gaze almost makes you crumble to your knees. It’s like he’s testing you. You think back to the hospital. How distressed showing skin made him and you look at Nate and the other two men in the room.
“Doctor Graham, I apologize for the trouble but could you be so kind as to send our audience away. I do not think it is necessary to let them witness the examination.”
The Doc startles in surprise looks around the room and then does as you say. Finally it’s just the three of you and you nod at Simon. “Can you take it off?”
He swallows audibly and slowly his hands go to the hem of his shirt. The hesitation makes you nervous and you wish you could prevent him from having to do this. Before he begins undressing you turn to the Doctor again.
“I’m sorry but is there another way we can do this? I’d like to keep him from harm. Is there a way for this to work without us watching him?” You pray the doctor won’t brush you off. Hopefully your continuous questions and wishes don’t annoy him.
He smiles, crow feet growing more prominent around his eyes and he thinks. Simon’s frozen with his hands on his shirt. It doesn’t look like you’re making an enemy here so you continue.
“If the wounds have been okay up to now maybe he could check them following your instructions without us watching and he can tell you what you need to know?”
Both the Doctor and Simon’s gaze weigh on you and you wish you could shrivel up and disappear but you promised Simon to protect him and you intend to follow through with it.
Doctor Graham looks over a file, scanning the information. You hold your breath and then the older man nods slowly. “Yes, that could work. But he’d have to speak to me for that.”
“Simon?”
His nostrils flare and he nods. “Yes.”
Once again the doctors blanks, then he seems to remember where he is and turns around with his chair. You step closer to Simon and let go of the leash. “I’ll be right here. Just do as the Doc says. No one will look at you.” You quietly instruct well aware that the Doctor can hear you anyway in the dead silent room.
You turn around and the sound of fabric rustling makes you clench your fist. You watch the doctor look at a chart. “Do you have any wounds that feel tender or hot?”
“No.”
He nods and writes something down then he proceeds to lead Simon through the process of checking every wound even instructing him how to check his ribs and fingers. Somehow they manage with Simon’s one word answers and you find yourself slowly relaxing.
Doctor Graham is professional but warm and it makes you feel like crying. It’s absurd how kindness makes your eyes wet but the female doctors harshness didn’t. Once Simon is dressed again you turn back around and give him an approving nod.
Doctor Graham looks up. “I need to rewrap your fingers, Simon.” He calmly states. You expect Simon to grow agitated but he simply nods, holding out his fingers.
The process makes him flinch whenever the doctor touches him but it barely takes a minute until it’s done. Expectantly you hold out the hand for Simon’s leash again and he drops the end into your palm so you can grab it again. You wait for the Doctors dismissal, instead he kindly smiles at you and points at the examination table.
“Your turn. Let me take a look at your arm.”
Bewildered you look at your neatly wrapped arm, having completely forgotten about it. Something about that makes you laugh quietly and you let go of Simon’s leash again. The big hybrid parks himself against a wall and watches as the Doctor unwraps your arm.
The bite looks angry, the wounds deceptively small but the skin and flesh are black and blue, bruised all over and tender to the touch. You can feel Simon’s eyes on the wound like a physical touch while the practiced hands of the doctor check the wound, put some ointment on it and rewrap it.
It’s honestly not surprising when he tells you that your bones probably took some damage too, although not enough to break and that you should take it easy on that arm for a while.
Finally you’re all done and Simon comes up to you, handing you the leash. Before you go, you address the Doctor once more. “Thank you so much for being so accommodating, doctor. And I’m sorry if I caused any trouble by asking for you.” You don’t know how to explain further without going on a tangent but his lips quirk up and he nods.
“It’s not a problem. We’re here to help. And please, just call me Graham without the doctor. We’re coworkers now.” His hand is warm as it engulfs yours when you say goodbye.
Nate is still waiting outside and before you know it you’re back in Simon’s little room. You let go of the leash and beam up at him. “You did so well Simon. I’m really proud of you.”
Before you can add anything he’s already ripped the muzzle off his head and unbuckled the collar letting it all drop to the floor. He takes a few steps back and shudders. You watch him concerned but he seems to calm down soon enough and once Nate deems it safe he turns to you.
“The handler management wants to talk to you. I reported the attack and initially they wanted to keep him locked up here but I took the liberties of telling them about this morning too and they want to talk to you before making their decision. We can’t keep him here forever and expect him to make any progress.”
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scribbly-artist · 3 days ago
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Warm You, Melt You
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Summary: Jayce insisted that he and Viktor should brave the cold and work at the laboratory at the academy today. However, an unexpected snowstorm had them running home. Viktor was a bit grumpy about slipping over on the slick ground and was absolutely freezing, so Jayce wants to make it up to him and warm him back up, one way or another.
Author’s Notes: This was a long one stewing in the pot. I’ve been building it up piece by piece until this morning. The server has convinced me to post it earlier rather than later tonight, so here’s a little treat for everyone. >:)
Words: ~1,550 | AO3 Link
The door to the apartment flew wide open with the assistance of the strong wind the snowstorm had brought. Two men came tumbling through the open doorway, covered in snow, slamming the door closed upon entry. 
They were covered in snow. Jayce and Viktor both had to go out today to the academy to do some work, which was clearly a mistake. They should have just written some notes and ideas down in the comfort of their toasty apartment instead of braving the wild weather outside. But, Jayce had insisted.
Jayce brushed off some of the lingering snow on his shoulders. “I know what you’re gonna say—”
“I told you so.” Viktor responded smugly.
“I know, I know,” Jayce replied with a sigh. “I didn’t think the storm would get that bad, though.”
“Mhmmm.” Viktor was brushing off the cold snow off of his clothes with a frown. The snow on his head was already starting to melt, dampening his brown hair.
Jayce let out a chuckle, patting Viktor on top of his head. “You’re looking like a sad, wet puppy right now.”
Viktor scowled at that, shivering. “This sad, wet puppy just wants to get warm. The cold, it just goes straight through me. That’s why I try to not go out in that weather, I’m not as crazy as you are.”
Jayce’s eyebrows raised at that, not taking Viktor’s bait of attempting to get a rise out of him. He let out a sigh, those emotions clearing as he brain stormed a way to warm each other up.
“Don't worry, I've got an idea.”
And Jayce did. He passed Viktor a towel so he could dry his hair (Jayce offered to assist him but Viktor did it himself), they both stripped down so they weren't in their bulky outside clothes, but in their cozy inside clothes. Jayce lended Viktor a hand to remove his brace on his leg and his torso so he would be more comfortable. Then they got all snuggled up in their shared bed, Jayce being the little spoon, of course. 
“You’re like a human hot water bottle.” Commented Viktor from behind Jayce, making the other chuckle. 
“I've always ran on the warmer side.”
They were basking in each other's silence for a while. Viktor eventually stopped shivering from the cold, and instead wanted to get into a bit of mischief as payback for Jayce’s insistence of even suggesting stepping foot outside the apartment today. While his core was quite toasty, his hands were still a little cold. Viktor’s chilly hands travelled, finding their way under Jayce’s shirt and planted themselves on his stomach. Ahh, his skin felt nice and warm on his palms. 
Jayce involuntarily let out a full body shiver from the difference in temperature. 
“Woah, your hands are still that cold?”
“Mhm
 you can help me warm them up.”
And with that, Viktor’s fingers started moving. He started tracing patterns into Jayce’s belly. Soft and gentle, enough to make the other jitter with giggles. 
“Vihihiktor, it tihihickles!”
Viktor planted his chin on Jayce’s shoulder, giving his neck a little smooch which only made the other only giggle and scrunch up. “How will the full surface of my hands warm up properly if they’re still?”
“Juhuhust leheheave them in thehehe one spohohot!” 
It wasn't tickly enough that Jayce was trying to pull away (not that he ever did — and Viktor noticed this), but enough to get him giggling, his nose scrunching up and his eyes crinkling close. 
Viktor let out a content hum. “But that wouldn't be fun. Would you deny a man his little bit of joy?” He did slow down his tracing just enough so that Jayce could actually think straight. 
Jayce thought for a moment, only giggling more until he responded, “I guehehess I can beahahar it for yohohou
”
And it stayed that way, at least for a while. Viktor mindlessly traced patterns into every inch of skin his cold fingertips could reach — until they felt nice and warm. Jayce appreciated that now they weren't icicles touching his poor bare skin, no longer making him shake and shiver. While Viktor loved hearing Jayce’s sweet giggles, his ears and his mischievous side also wanted to hear him laugh without a care in the world. 
Viktor started to squeeze at the little bit of tummy fat that he had discovered last time he tickled Jayce. It was a tiny bit of chub Jayce couldn't get rid of no matter how much he exercised. 
And Viktor learnt that spot in particular was very ticklish. 
Jayce flinched, then let out a laugh. “Vihihik! I was getting– USED to the trahahacing!” He exclaimed, his voice raising once Viktor squeezed that niiiice spot yet again. 
“Need to keep you on your toes, Talis.”
With that statement, another idea to bug Jayce came into Viktor’s mind. While his hands were nice and warm, his feet were still as cold as a block of ice. 
Jayce had no time to react to the blankets shifting as Viktor shuffled himself to raise his good leg up, planting an icy cold foot against Jayce’s bare back with an amused chuckle. 
The only way to describe the noise that came out of Jayce’s mouth was akin to a prey’s screech from being hunted by a predator. 
This made Viktor laugh, but he would be laughing from a different cause in only a few moments. 
Jayce spun himself around in the bundle of blankets, grabbing Viktor’s cold ankle in a headlock, scribbling fingers touching down on his sole as revenge. 
Viktor screeched just as loud as Jayce did seconds before. Maybe even louder. 
“Hey, I think I know how to warm your feet up.”
“JAYAHACE– NOHOT THIHIS!”
“I think some tickling would warm them up plenty. I have you keep you on your toes, too. Don’t you agree?” With that, his dexterous fingers travelled up to his mentioned toes, tormenting the spot underneath their scrunching up that they were trying so hard to protect. 
This drove Viktor wild. 
“NOHOHO!! B-BACK TOHOHO CUDDLES– BACK TO CUHUHUDDLES!” He attempted many times to tug his foot out of Jayce’s hold with no avail. Viktor was just much too sensitive on his feet. 
Jayce let up after a few more moments, giving his poor foot a couple more traces on his arch for good measure, releasing his ankle from his grip. “Seems like someone can’t take what they dish out.”
Viktor rolled over the other way in mock annoyance, letting out a dramatic huff. However, the smile glued to his face betrayed his actions. 
Jayce snuck his way over to his partner’s side of the bed, his arms snaking around to spoon him. “Back to cuddles, like you said.”
“Hmph, after you already tortured me.”
“Hey, you did the exact same to me earlier.”
“While yes, I did, you deserved it.”
“What? How come?”
“For making me bear that snowstorm outside. I even slipped over on my ass from how slick the ground was.”
Jayce let out a laugh, and from the contagious sound, Viktor did as well. There was a comfortable silence for a moment, their breath syncing.
Jayce plopped his head down against Viktor’s bare shoulder, his lips ghosting his skin, the other letting out a shiver. Jayce planted a soft kiss on a mole he could see. “I think I can make it up to you.”
Viktor could feel his cheeks starting to burn, but kept up the charade. “Hmph
 such bold confidence; you sure about that?”
“Oh, I know I can.”
He put his plan into action. Jayce began tenderly kissing whatever moles he could spot on Viktor’s back and shoulder. This led him up a trail to Viktor’s neck and jaw, kissing a few that were in abundance on the side of his neck. His partner let out a shiver and a huff at the affection. Not only did his cheeks burn a fiery red, but Jayce could see how pink his ears had gotten as well from his service. 
Snuggling his face into Viktor’s hair, Jayce spoke up. “So, how’d I do?”
“Mmm, could be better.” He was playing it up, of course. He enjoyed pushing the other’s buttons.
“Don’t lie to me, your ears say it all.” Jayce reached up and gently traced his finger against the edge of Viktor’s ear, getting a giggle and a scrunched up shoulder from the other.
“Alrihihight, alright. You did well, Jayce. But don’t let it go to your head.”
Oh, it already did. 
“Want some more?” 
Was that even a question? Of course.
“If you would be oh so inclined.” Viktor replied, the grin could be heard in his voice.
“That’s all I needed to hear.”
Jayce continued his kissing journey — whatever skin on Viktor’s face he could reach, down his shoulders and back again, even a bit against his side and stomach. His moles and freckles were his guide on his devoted act of service. And Viktor was loving every moment of it, and he told Jayce as such.
This continued on from the afternoon, evening till night until they were both very, very warm.
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lazysoulwriter · 20 hours ago
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Cramps, Chaos, and Cuddles - Pedro Pascal.
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Pedro knew something was off the moment he stepped into the apartment. The energy in the air was different—dense, almost vibrating with an unseen force. And then he saw you, curled up on the couch, arms crossed, eyes narrowed at the TV as if it had personally offended you.
Oh. It was one of those days.
He treaded carefully, removing his shoes and placing his keys down with the gentleness of a surgeon handling a heart transplant. "Hey, baby."
You barely spared him a glance. "Hi."
Yep. Definitely one of those days.
Pedro tilted his head, observing you like a detective at a crime scene. "How bad is it? On a scale of 'mildly irritated' to 'burning the world down'?"
Your glare snapped to him. "Shut up."
He raised his hands in surrender, fighting the amused smirk threatening to break through. "Okay. Just gathering data."
He walked toward the couch and—mistake number one—tried to sit next to you.
"No. Absolutely not."
Pedro froze mid-squat. "No?"
"I don’t want you near me right now."
"Ouch." He clutched his chest dramatically. "You wound me, baby."
You shot him a deadpan look. "I’m serious. I feel like shit. I hate everything and everyone. Including you."
He gasped. "Me? What did I do?"
"Exist."
Pedro bit his lip to keep from laughing. "Okay, fair. Can I do anything to help?"
You let out a frustrated sigh, rubbing your temple. "I already took medicine, but my cramps still suck. My head hurts. The light is too bright. The air is too air-y. Everything is annoying."
He nodded solemnly. "Sounds rough. Allow me to fix what I can."
First, he dimmed the lights, plunging the room into a cozy, softer glow. Then, he disappeared into the kitchen and returned with a heating pad, placing it gently against your stomach without a word. You grumbled but adjusted it until it sat just right.
He wasn't done.
Pedro vanished again and returned with a glass of water and a small plate of chocolate. He set them on the coffee table before kneeling beside you, resting his chin on the cushion near your arm.
"Now, can I give my baby some love?" he asked, pouting like a kicked puppy.
You glared at him for a few long seconds, trying—really trying—to hold onto your irritation. But those big brown eyes, the way he practically radiated warmth and patience
 it was unfair.
Your resolve cracked.
"Fine. But only because you tried really hard."
He grinned triumphantly, sliding onto the couch beside you. "I’ll take it."
Pedro pulled you gently into his arms, letting you rest against his chest. His hands moved in slow, soothing circles against your back, and the heat from his body combined with the heating pad made you melt just a little.
"See? Isn’t this better?" he murmured, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.
You hummed, neither confirming nor denying. His fingers traced lazy patterns along your arm, and the steady rise and fall of his breathing was enough to lull you into a half-doze.
Then, just as you were fully relaxing, he pressed a dramatic, exaggerated kiss against your cheek with a loud "Mwah!"
You groaned. "Pedro."
Another kiss, this time to your jaw. "What?"
"Stop."
He kissed your temple. "But I love you."
A sigh. "I know."
"And you love me."
"I tolerate you."
He gasped again, clutching his chest. "So cruel. And here I am, taking care of you like a devoted boyfriend—"
"Pedro."
"Yes, baby?"
You finally turned to face him properly, your arms wrapping around his waist as you burrowed into his warmth. "Shut up and keep cuddling me."
He smiled against your hair. "Yes, ma'am."
And with that, he held you closer, peppering your face with softer, gentler kisses, whispering sweet nothings until all the tension melted away. Because no matter how grumpy, irritated, or downright impossible you felt—Pedro would always be there, ready to love you through it all.
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writersblockiskillingme · 3 days ago
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I NEED GI HUN X F! READER PLEASEEEEEE
There’s barely anything for him:((
It can be literally anything but rn I’m craving comfort so maybe Gi Hun comforts his girl when she starts crying and she can’t really explain what’s wrong
Comfort | Seong Gi-hun x reader
Pairing: Seong Gi-hun x fem!reader
Summary: You knew that hunting down the salesman was going to be difficult, but after everything that you've been through in the games alongside Gi-hun, sometimes everything feels like it's going to suffocate you. Luckily, he's always there for you.
Warning/s: angst, hurt/comfort, a little fluff, short fic, just two traumatized people trying to heal each other, PTSP (talking about the games), death, tears, sadness, depressed atmosphere, cigarette addiction, cursing (?), mourning, guns, hunting down the salesman, possible grammar and spelling mistakes
Author's note: So I finally got out of the writer's block, and I found some spare time, so I finally sat down to write. I gave it my best shot. I hope you like it! More to come.
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Being his friend was easy. Being in love with him was even easier.
Once the games came around, everything became more complicated. I simply never thought that something like this was going to happen. Working in a job position that I did never brought me much money. Sure, it was enough to bring some food on my table and to cover the bills, but it wasn't anything big. However, once I found myself drowning in debt, I found myself in a horrific situation with no way out.
The money that I earned was not enough for respectable food, I couldn't pay my landlord for a few months, and I was a few weeks away from being kicked out on the streets. Not to mention the debt for which it seemed like I never paid enough to get out of. I thought moving back to Korea would somehow help me at least to escape the loan sharks and pay for necessary things, but I couldn't imagine how wrong I would be.
That's when I met him. The Salesman. Playing the ddakji with him for some money earned me some food for that night, but it also gave me an opportunity of a lifetime. It was an opportunity that I now know I would have never taken if I had known what was waiting for me out there once I called the number at the back of the card that he gave me.
Before the first game, I saw him. My old childhood friend Seong Gi-hun. Up until I saw him, I came to a realization about just how much I missed him.
Truth to be told, I have always felt something more than friendship for him ever since I was I kid. At first, I brushed it off, but when I entered my teenage years, I realized that I really loved him.
I had to move away when I was twenty years old. I haven't seen him ever since. I only heard a few snippets about his life during the years I spent away from Korea. I heard that he had a, now ex, wife, and a daughter.
It was his mother who called me. She used to watch over me sometimes when we were kids, and since I was her son's best friend back then, we kept in touch over the years. It was nice, to be honest. Up until the day that she called me for a regular check-up. I had just gotten off of work after a really bad day. I had just sat down by the kitchen counter when I heard my phone ringing. The entire time I was on a call with her, she sounded strange. Kind of nervous, maybe even a bit disappointed. After a while I couldn't take it anymore and when I asked her what was wrong she told me the joyful news.
"Gi-hun is getting married."
I couldn't breathe. I felt like I was suffocating. I somehow forced myself to finish the phone call, trying to sound as happy as I could, considering that the love of my life was marrying another. A few years later, he got a daughter, and I soon heard about the divorce. I tried calling him multiple times to check on him. He never answered.
We reconnected during the games. During the bloodshed. During the pain. During the tears. During the final game, where it was down to Sangwoo, him and I. After Sangwoo died, I knew I couldn't kill him. He couldn't either. After the stunt that we pulled, we survived. We were about to kill ourselves, we truly were, but then at the last second, just as the knife had scraped the surface of my neck, they announced two winners.
After that, I realized that I couldn't live without him. I didn't have a family, didn't have any friends. His mother died, and his daughter moved with her mother and stepfather to America he lost his family, too. We were everything to each other. We still are.
As the months, years, passed, we set ourselves on a mission of finding the salesman.
At first, we didn't touch the money covered with the invisible blood. We couldn't bring ourselves to do so, but when we realized that we may have a shot at taking down the games, we used the money only for that sole purpose.
The first thing we did was to pay off our debts. Then together we bought the love hotel called "Pink Motel" in Seoul. The sign outside was always tured off. We decided to buy it so we could live there and now we also use it as headquarters while tracking down the salesman. Which was always.
That was currently our only purpose in life right now.
After we figured out our plan, we started to work with the loan sharks that were chasing us because of our debts. We paid them to find the salesman, and they were searching relentlessly.
Our mental health hasn't been all that great either.
Both Gi-hun and I have developed a cigarette addiction. Sometimes all we did was breath in the intoxicating smoke instead of air. In a strange way it helped me breath. I wasn't so nervous anymore. My hands shook less.
Gi-hun has nightmares. Every single night. I have them, too, but not that frequently. He had a gun next to his nightstand. I had mine under the pillow. It brought a sense of comfort that was always short-lived.
The nightmares kept us up all night, and because of them, we couldn't find any rest even during the daytime. It was always the people we lost on that cured island. Sangwoo... Sae-byeok... Ali... The images of our friends dead never left my brain. And neither did Gi-hun's. Other times, we dreamt that we're still playing the games. Us dying. Each other dying. The Frotman. The salesman.
It was too much.
I was just monitoring the room where our most trusted men were practicing. I didn't realize when it had happened, but I fell asleep. I guess all those sleeping pills that Boss Kim gave to Gi-hun and me finally caught up to me.
I felt trapped. Gi-hun... he was dying in front of me during the squid game. I couldn't do anything about it. I held him, covered in his blood, crying, screaming, curing at the sky for the misfortune we had to live. Cursing the makers of the game. Cursing the Frontman. Cursing the pink guards that just stood there and did nothing. Cursing the world.
Hands.
They were shaking my shoulders.
My name.
It was uttered from the lips of the man that I would die for.
My eyes snapped open, meeting Gi-hun's worried ones. Once he realized that I was awake, his face visibly relaxed, relief washing over him as I heard him let out a sigh, his head and shoulders hung downwards.
"A nightmare again?" He asked me as he brought his hand up to my cheeks, whipping away the tears that I didn't know fell, but also wasn't surprised that they did.
"I-I can't-" I sobbed, unable to form a sentence as he quickly brought me in his arms, drowning me in his chest.
"Shhh..." He whispered as he ran his hand down my hair as I cried against his neck, drowning his black shirt with my tears, "I'm here. You're okay."
"Yo-You w-were-" I stuttered, tears streaming down my cheeks, "You were dying, and I-I couldn't s-save y-you."
For a moment, there was just quiet in the room. Neither spoke. The only thing breaking the silence of our bedroom were my cries.
"Do you know why I never answered your phone calls after you found out about the divorce?" He asked me, his voice low, but soft with comfort. His sudden question about that topic surprising me a bit, "Do you know why my mother told you about it instead of me? The wedding, the divorce?"
"No."
"It was because I didn't want to face the fact that I was the cause of your misery." He whispered, still softly running his hand through my hair, my cries slowly dying down as I listened to him speak.
"I have always loved you and I knew that I hurt you with my decision even though I never wanted that to happen. I just tried to forget about you, I never knew that I could actually be with you." He sighed, "I thought that it would be the best for you. I didn't deserve you, I'm not even sure I still do." He chuckled softly.
"But even though I may not deserve you, I will never stop fighting for you and your happiness. You are my everything, and I would be damned if I ever let you feel any sort of pain." He lifted my chin with his hand as he leaned down, pressing his forehead against mine, our lips almost meeting each other's, "We will find him and end this, but for now, how about I make you some tea and we get you to bed huh, my love? What do you say?"
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@shadow-tumbler
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