#i was destined to be alone
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hollabackgabe · 1 year ago
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if we think i could forget you, then we are both delusional.
brushes of lips and the grip of hands sear my skin daily. i could never be rid of you
frankly, i dont want to be
i deserve to burn
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justaz · 3 months ago
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oh hot take for people to ignore bc its not that deep, ship what you want, but merthur physically cannot have a third. i think that's literally impossible. they're so inextricably bound to one another that it's always going to be MERTHUR and that person...i guess. like. merlin and arthur are always going to chose one another above everything. i just. don't think being their third would be fun. unless you just wanna watch. i guess.
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johnskleats · 5 months ago
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Azula would have lost the Final Agni Kai no matter what. Here's why:
Azula is insecure. That's why she takes cheap shots. She did it with Katara, and she did it with Aang in CoD, AND she did it with Iroh striking him with lightning. One could even argue that her behavior in CoD foreshadows some of what happens in the Agni Kai, where in CoD, Katara fights Azula, and Zuko saves her, whereas in the Final Agni Kai, Zuko fights Azula and saves Katara. It's a little mismatch of dynamics.
Azula cheating (constantly), is a staple of dishonorable behavior, which I think is interesting.
We see her "play with her food" like a cat, with the Dai Lee and other opponents she encounters. She tricks them and manipulates them and there's no threat. Killing Aang with lightning was SUPREMELY stupid on her part, and she wouldn't have done it unless she was cornered. She didn't even stick around to make sure he was dead or have any of them followed-- because she was scared. Zuko NEVER flees in fights out of fear. He doubles down like a lunatic and tries to get himself killed instead. Azula is not willing to risk her life, and that's why she's a worse fighter. The insecurity gets to her head and she psychs herself out
Azula has a lot of fire power (lol), but Zuko has the heart and commitment to see actions through to the end. That's why he would have won, had Azula not cheated.
By the end, they were evenly matched in firepower anyway. They did the Raging Line of Flames Competing Colors thing and met in the middle, and stayed there. That's how animation tells us about their ability.
Azula's seat of power in her firebending is spite and fear. She's not even mad, bro.
Zuko's seat of power, at the end, is light and life and love. One is a powder keg that runs out after you blow it up once, and the other is like an oil fire in a parking lot. There's essentially infinite fuel there.
Zuko would have certainly outlasted her. And did, if you think about it. Because she panicked.
Azula's entire persona is a mask, just as Zuko's bravado and pettiness in the first season was a mask. (Funny, that he can only be himself when he's hidden the scar with the blue spirit mask, therefore freeing himself of the shame and the mark that brands him as a villain)
They show us that Azula's mask is not only slipping, but cracking, crumbling in the mirror scene. That's why it's there: to show the audience that all of her running has finally caught up with her.
This world that Azula created has been a sham from the beginning. Castles in the sky to make up for what she lacks: love.
Which is why she would never win against Zuko if they both reached their full potential, as they did during the comet.
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turnaboutstar · 3 months ago
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yes you will be fine little apollo you will have fun with your little sister soon,,,
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finalgirlsamwinchester · 1 year ago
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guy who so desperately tries to find god. who wants to have faith in a higher authority to guide him out of the hole he's in. from the weight of guilt from simply existing, as the person he is. but every time he thinks he's answered his higher calling it turns out he's made the Morally Incorrect choice and his path to goodness and holiness was the road to the devil all along
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kyouka-supremacy · 1 year ago
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I really wish there were more fics that delved into how Akutagawa's love for Atsushi is different from his love for Dazai.
Tbh I just wish Akutagawa's romantic feelings for Dazai were acknowledged more and I'm only now realizing it's so weird how nobody really ever brings them up? while it's all so evidently there. I mean, considering Akutagawa to be / having been in love with Dazai is seriously a perfectly feasible, consistent, realistic way to interpret the text without any need to bend or stretch it. It just makes a lot of sense for how his character is portrayed - his obsession with Dazai, his devotion, his desperation to be acknowledged and approved by him - and I think it's quite the important piece to understand his character. His love for Dazai is a significant aspect of Akutagawa's character, and it also explains why he's always been so vulnerable to manipulation by Dazai specifically. In a way, I think Akutagawa being so unmistakingly gay is also coherent with the way he's completely indifferent and even oblivious to Higuchi's feelings for him that lie at the light of the day– although, please note, that's a slippery slope that can degenerate in apologism for the way he abuses her, so I beg to be mindful when considering that.
Akutagawa's feelings for Dazai are in ultimate analysis extremely relevant for how Akutagawa falls and acts in the sskk picture: Atsushi being not the first person Akutagawa ever fell for, so in a way him being more aware of his own feelings than Atsushi is; Akutagawa falling for Atsushi first (and harder), because at this point he already knows he likes men, he already knows what being in love with someone feels like. But at the same time I believe that it's so interesting to explore how his feelings for Dazai are different from what he holds for Atsushi. On one side you have Akutagawa's feelings for Dazai being passive: not in the way he doesn't act after them, of course he does, but in the way he's always passively subject to Dazai's abuse, unable to stand for himself, blinded by his devotion to Dazai and unable to really see the damage he's causing him. Passive in the way that he's created this image of Dazai in his mind, perfect, god-like, static and unnatural, that struggles to evolve and adapt to reality. Akutagawa's love for Atsushi, on the other hand, is aggressive: always actively trying to hurt the other, always attempting to make the other suffer; it really speaks of someone whom, all his life, has always associated love with pain. Akutagawa hurts Atsushi because he knows love means pain, and he hurts Atsushi because he can't allow his love for him to hurt Akutagawa again as deeply and painfully as it's done in the past. It's a little sad. Ultimately, Akutagawa's love for Atsushi being the push Akutagawa needs to get over Dazai at last, something I fear he never really managed to do up to - I believe - at least chapter 53: getting over Dazai as something he gradually achieved after the soul-searching he did during his absence between chapters 53 and 84. Chapter 84 being the one where Akutagawa willingly, readily said “no” to Dazai in a way that was so sudden and surprising for anyone who knows him and that is easy to interpret as Akutagawa finally starting to free himself from the influence Dazai has had on him up to that point. That's why Akutagawa's sacrifice for Atsushi is all the more important and poignant, because him protecting (and dying for) Atsushi was never for Dazai to begin with.
I always always considered Akutagawa being gay and in love with Dazai to be like. the most evidently queer thing the bsd canon has to offer (and maybe the “you know the reason yourself don't you”, but I guess that falls under the bigger category of “Ryuunosuke Akutagawa is a character that is gay”); but now that I think about it, nobody ever brings it up really. I can guess it's probably because most people - including people who like Akutagawa and ship sskk - ultimately sympathize with Dazai, and even where acknowledging the hurt he's done to Akutagawa, don't really like to dwell on it or explore the relationship between the two of them which is... legit, indeed. Still, I think their relationship and Akutagawa's romantic feelings for Dazai are a very important part of his character that shouldn't be overlooked when trying to accurately portray him.
And the rational part of my brain knows this can't be intentional, knows Akutagawa wasn't written to be read as gay. But there's another I'd dare say equally rational part of my brain that keeps speaking up to say the majority of his characterization - his devotion to Dazai, his (can I say? tender) sacrifice for Atsushi, his mistreatment of Higuchi - really starts to make sense only when you interpret him as gay. So, sorry???
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whatlieswithintheorchard · 1 year ago
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say a jewish time traveler, travels from a certain thursday to a certain monday. does she then need to observe shabbat on the 7th day according to her own personal timeline, or does she celebrate it on the saturday of the local timeline?
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meganegatari · 4 months ago
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chat my love life is way too pathetic to just be "unlucky". like atp im thinking...did i do something??? ffs who did i do wrong that much...or am i hideous but no one has told me. am i actually a terrible person but just don't realize it- LIKE WHAT I DO BECAUSE ITS SO SAD ITS EMBARRASSING can't have anything in this world bruh😭
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thecobaltmonk · 5 months ago
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I think the tragedy of Rio is that she loved Agatha more than anything, but Agatha loved someone else more than her.
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thenegoteator · 16 days ago
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I never actually put together that the witch of the waste didn't learn all about Wales and John Donne from Howl drastically oversharing about himself, because she literally says she learned it from Percival
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justaz · 7 months ago
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oh fuck merlin following after arthur for five seasons, at his heel following him into every battle, every fight, every quest without regard for his own safety. arthur dying on the shore of that damn lake and merlin dying with him but his body remains. arthur goes to avalon and merlin is forced to stay on earth. merlin can’t follow arthur this time. this is one journey merlin and arthur can’t take together. two halves split and kept apart for over fifteen hundred years. goddamn it. these fucking assholes never fail to make me cry. i hate them i hate them i hate them i hate them
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blankdesires · 6 days ago
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okay y’all have to agree this is cute as hell💕
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mako-neexu · 1 year ago
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a 'beginning' and 'end', a place to feel grounded, a place of bottomlessness, a place of safety and familiarity, the feelings of the living to a journey that seemed to feel as if there is no end in sight can be a burden no one can bear. a familiar feeling of floating as you fall almost endlessly, as if suspended in time, a memory that reminds you of someone from years past, a nostalgic feeling of soft gloves and pink hair, of a small smile of happiness and the faint smell of chemical and antiseptic... so close like a star. all the things you lost, all the sorrow, all the memories of cherished pain and joy shall be your guide until the end. you will reach that destination as one of the living. should you falter and feel as if time had stopped and nothing grounds you to the earth, and you feel that you have been falling endlessly without hope, may the bonds you have gained pull you up. again and again. should you fall, should your heart waver in the face of mind numbing ache to bittersweet nostalgia, everything that you keep close to your heart shall save you, one way or another. as long as there is an end to the fall, you are alive. you are alive.
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questionably-audhd-oracle · 3 months ago
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Heyyyyyyyy so I accidentally delved into a part of my childhood that I never think about and realized my life has been even more depressing than I previously have been thinking- I don’t even know what to do with this shit at this point
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riverphoenixsgothwife · 2 months ago
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what's your fave movie atm? :0
my favorite five movies are final destination 3, heathers, beetlejuice, basil, and i love you to death!! the last five movies i watched were indiana jones and the last crusade, hard rain, i love you to death, alone in the dark 2, and the parent trap.
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brightyearning · 1 year ago
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rewatching Nana is just muttering "fuck shoji" to yourself for the first 20 episodes
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