#i was converted. against my will.
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guess what everyone today is national coming out day and while i have technically already come out as a lesbian i have found a way celebrate this very important day
at 11:30pm but shut up
i am officially coming out as a supporter of bedehop
#i am both be very dramatic and not at all dramatic when i say this was harder than coming out as a lesbian#unhinged posting#i will take question for 60 seconds.#yes that is a brooklyn 99 reference#who asked? i asked dammit#weird to say that on my own post but yknow what i dont care anymore#in my defense#i was converted. against my will.#ok well techincally nobody made me continuing reading but i did NOT consent to them being in my brain#i think i left the back door unlocked#to my brain. the door to my brain.#i let my guard down for ONE fic and suddenly im here#been wanting to do this for a while#and im not kidding#the vagueposting was not even for my brain i had to do it#please support me during this very confusign period of my life#national coming out day#i found a way to turn it into a stupid joke because i'm a joke#pokemon sword and shield#pokemon swsh#shipping#finally i am free#i can like the stuff on main :3#i would tag more but honestly i dont want more people looking at me right now#this is like a half serious post in that im not kidding but also this is silly so cant be 100% srs#you do not want to know how long it took me to type this. it is embarrasing how much it took
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Something interesting I've noticed about conversion stories is many people seem to have both a rebellious streak and a deep-seated, insatiable desire to learn everything.
One of my shul's well-respected members (who runs the hebrew/judaism class that will start soon) talked about how, when he lived in my town, he would sneak out of the house just to go to shul. That's what I'm doing now, and it's funny (I'm not sneaking out per se, but I am also not telling anybody I'm going to shul). There's an aspect of free-spiritedness that I notice in many converts, and it's fascinating to hear each of their stories. And you know the funniest part? They sound like my story.
#jumblr#jew by choice#jewish conversion#personal thoughts tag#sorry i'm posting so much 💀#but i have been noticing this A Lot#and i don't think its essential to be converting/converted but i think there's a reason that converts tend to have similar feelings/thought#i think the unifying trait is the desire to leave one thing and come home to another#i think for that to happen you tend to have a lot of free spirits and a lot of faith and trust#for me it's hard but i also have that in-born need to fly away - to go home and never look back#i don't say rebellious to mean bad but more like... you aren't 'adhering' to the life you were brought up in#i had rebelled against xtianity before finally accepting that i will never and cen never force myself to believe in it#and i think that's where some peoples' rebellious streak starts#again sorry i'm posting every tiny miniscule thought but B''H for guiding the story of our lives#it was SO cool and welcoming to hear that [member] grew up in my town and we go to the same shul
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other half
redraw screenshots taken from this post i made a while back ignore that i forgot to actually link it for like an entire day
#THE SILLIES#i have an exam in 9 hours and i haven't studied for it. kuwabara was more important (<- i'll be ok + i'll study soon)#yyh#yu yu hakusho#kazuma kuwabara#kuwabara kazuma#yusuke urameshi#urameshi yusuke#kuwameshi#yyh puu#idk what people tag him as... :/#also i hope it's not too obvious that i'm the least comfortable drawing yusuke outta the main four. idk what it is. the eyes? hm#like hiei i can't draw consistently but i usually like it anyway so whatever. but yusuke i just feel like i'm so close to getting it right#but i never quite get there. essence uncaptured vibes tarnished. but that's probably just me#also no kuwa would not steal a catalytic converter. it goes against his honor code as established in episode uhhh idk 7? the one w/ eikichi#skrunkart#haven't done one of these flat tone sketch pages in a while... i like them though they're pretty#though i kiiiinda gave up on the overall composition by the end </3. eh whatever at least it's out there now#also my favorites of this are the one of kuwa holding puu with like. club penguin eyes? and puu diving at kuwa's egg. i just think they're#ute. plus the one of kuwa sleeping holding puu w the thousand yard stare. idk just silly to me#anyway hopefully it's clear that i love kuwabara. the end
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You win some: find out one of the undergrads in lab is into f1
You lose some: find out she's a staniel (and maybe a chirlie) within 30 seconds of speaking 🫠
#i walked up in my mclaren sweatshirt and she goes ''oh you like f1? how are you liking all the drama with lando right now? 🤭''#and i said ''not at all actually because he's my fave and it's made me have to get off social media 😩''#cue to her saying she never liked lando after how he treated daniel. i said ''but he didnt even do anything.''#and shes goes ''we'll have to agree to disagree''#like im sorry what? ma'am what? im not a gate keeper against dts converts (since i am one myself) but maybe we can just this once a little#but also i pulled up wearing a mclaren sweatshirt. you had to know there was at least a 50/50 chance thats who i was for 💀#suffice to say i will not be speaking with her about anything. ill focus my energy on the carlos fan in my class instead#taylor talks
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The problem with the church today is that so many "Christians" do not actually believe in redemption.
#unironically christian#i say this because of all the people who make comments about people's testimony#like saying they don't believe that only fans girl who was saved and baptized was really saved#like... reading through the comments it becomes clear that the “Christians” don't actually accept her#like... my brother in Christ... your good deeds are as worthy as my used pad#that is straight up in the bible#you are not better than her and you do not deserve redemption more than her#her salvation is between her and God#and yes... you say that time will reveal her fruit and you are correct#but guess what#ananias was called to extend a hand to paul *before* his fruit showed#and he was a frigging serial killer who was out for ananias's blood the week before#you do not get to pick and choose which converts you get to except#you are not God and thank heavens for it because if you were we would all be doomed#*deep breath*#i am just so sick of this... farse... that Christianity has become#Christians need a wake up call#oh! and and when you act like its impossible to accept that she could be saved you belittle God's power#you call into question Jesus's blood and it's ability to cleanse and if that is false your salvation is worthless!#also also you go against the things clearly written in the Bible while wearing the title of Christian#which means you are misrepresenting God's nature and intentions which means you are breaking the command to not take the lord's name in vain#wow... i thought i was done at the deep breath... guess not😅#rat rants
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she's 39 he's 4000+ and they're having a slumber party (they squat in the same apartment)
two images of similar themes but very different styles because??? i honestly don't know
#my art#dishonored#the outsider#billie lurk#they hang out 👍#i hate drawing (still does it)#former outsider has yet to get any other clothes he has to make due with sleeping in his day clothes rn (<--lore)#friends come free with the flat :)#outsider neck scar one of my most beloved headcanons#billie's wearing a prosthetic liner (converted sock) in the first pic The Arm doesn't have a socket and also is magic but the strap would s#till chafe against her skin if she was wearing it w/out long sleeves#(<--more lore)#idk how it stays on even when she's wearing it over her jacket bc it's not fixed through sleeve loops or anything but. the arm is magic#so im gonna stop thinking about it now#just one more thing. the outsider is allegedy 5'6 according to a harvey smith tweet which is the same height as his dh2 va#and i have never seen anyone speculate on billie's height but going by va she'd be 5'7#which is kind of funny. why is he so small (friendly fire) (words from a guy that's shorter than him)
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My brother and I had a conversation about how we both are interested in officially converting to Judaism (I am Jewish and practice Judaism and celebrate Jewish traditions but not officially, it’s complicated) and I think it’s so funny that we both independently decided Judaism made more sense for us.
Also Happy Hanukkah to my Jewish siblings!
#nothing against christianity or catholicism#judaism just makes more sense to us#me and my brother do literally everything together#I suppose that could include conversion#it would piss off our catholic parents so much#to have two jewish convert kids?#they’d hate it#jewish#jewblr#judaism#jew by choice#jewish conversion#jewish convert#jew
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Deeply tired (but unsurprised) sigh
#Well shit#I was breaking down about it this morning but now I just feel… empty#Like I guess the back-to-back experience with losing another friend who believed violence against (((Zionists))) weren’t hate crimes-#last night just. Poured me out emotionally#Oh yeah I was literally talking about how I’d lost 4 friends to the leftist antisemitism rabbit hole (after I explained the most recent one#And she kept asking for “context” to make sure they were “really antisemitic” instead of “not wanting Palestinians to die”#LIK GIRL THEY’RE SUPPORTING TERRORISTS AND USING PALESTINIAN VICTIMS OF HATE CRIMES AS A GOTCHA TO TELL JEWS TO SHUT UP#HOW MUCH MORE DO I NEED TO TURN MY POCKETS OUT?!?!#She kept saying she just wanted to “understand the context” so that she could judge if the antisemitism I saw first hand was real#And she kept bringing up “gEnOcIdE” as a rebuttal to me saying that there were people using Palestine as an excuse to be antisemitic#I’m so fucking done.#I told her off for making my personal trauma about I/P and told her that I couldn’t have a romance with#someone who doesn’t trust Jews to define their own oppression#Leftist Antisemitism#Personal#Okay to reblog#Vent#Prospective Convert#Jewish Convert#Jumblr#My Post
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#so first of all i'm not jewish.#but i feel like i occupy a relatively weird position with respect to judaism.#because the neighbourhood in which i grew up was like...30-50% jewish?#it was jewish enough that the local families requested and got a hebrew immersion programme at the local elementary school#that operated in parallel to the english programme that i attended#and about half of my friends growing up were jewish.#and so i absorbed a lot of the surface-level details of the religion by a sort of osmosis#like...i knew the dates and significance of the various jewish holy days#and i knew a smattering of phrases in hebrew (phonetically); most of them apparently quite rude#and we occasionally did jewish religious songs in choir (some of them admittedly lifted from the 'Prince of Egypt' soundtrack)#and once when i was in high school i was on a trivia team; and we asked a run of questions about judaism;#and i was the only one who knew them even though (i swear to god) i was the non-Jewish player on either team#(and then when i was much older i almost married a jewish enby and i would even have tried to convert for them#but our relationship fell apart for unrelated reasons)#but one of the things that was drilled into me when i was growing up (by my dad who grew up under similar circumstances)#was that you don't criticise Israel; it's antisemitic to criticise Israel#(which made for a lot of fraught moments as a teenager given that i was watching the second Intifada on the news)#and the thing is even now in the face of what seems pretty unambiguously to be a genocide against the Palestinians#i find that i'm more circumspect about criticizing israel than i would be just about any other country under the same circumstances#like i was writing things like 'fuck saudi arabia' when they were murdering houthis in yemen#but 'fuck israel'?#even though a little harsh language is least of what that regime deserves#ugh#i feel like i'm privy to the death of a dream that was never even mine.#personal#religion
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It's almost comical how many people ask for breed suggestions, describe a Labrador exactly, and then are really really resistant to getting a Labrador.
It seems like people view them as the "boring, default dog." They are in fact really great, interesting, and perfect for what a lot of people want! Just get a dang Lab!
#I love Labs#All my favourite students are Labs#They're converting me to Labs#If I want a bigger dog I will definitely be looking at field labs#My absolute best two students are field Labs and you cannot beat those dogs for drive and work ethic and getting the thing done!#They don't have the herding drive hangups with clinginess or neurotic chasing or whatever so their distance work is so much easier honestly#Plus they're just friendly and even tempered and nice to live with and easy to groom and what not!#Like really the full package. Why are people so quick to scoff and be biased against them??#Anyway I can picture myself with a nice sporty black Lab girl one day#Or maybe a yellow boy
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It is so much fun watching Roseanna M. White be Catholic.
For one thing, she tells you cool history stuff about Christmas music.
#for another thing this is such a satisfying end to a years long saga#of me trying to figure out if she converted or not#it started when i found a blog post of hers explaining why scripture can't be the only source of christianity#and i was like 'honey you just point-for-point presented most of the catholic arguments against sola scriptura'#but other posts made it clear she was still protestant#so i could hope this was the beginning of a journey but didn't really expect anything#then a long time later she posts about how she and her family have found a church that fits their needs better#which is more how you talk about switching protestant churches and not going through rcia#so i dismissed all but the wildest hope#then she mentioned speaking at a catholic writer's conference#which doesn't necessarily prove anything because ecumenism is a thing#even the fact that she had a catholic branch to her small press didn't prove anything#it was run by her catholic friends and i know of protestants who work very closely with catholic initiatives while remaining protestant#so the evidence was piling up but there was nothing absolutely conclusive so it was driving me bonkers#and then FINALLY for advent she started talking about the liturgical year#and said 'now that my immediate family is catholic we celebrate advent'#AT LAST! CONFIRMATION!#(pun not intended but still appreciated)#and now she's had several blog posts making it clear she's very excited about catholic history and spirituality#and i'm so proud of her#i can see why you'd be coy when you have a very protestant audience but i'm glad she finally went public with it#not least because i get to find out cool stuff about christmas carols#catholic things#christmas#roseanna m. white
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i just need to make it to shabbat i just need to make it to shabbat i just need
#😵💫😵💫😵💫#short response due tmrw ; seminar presentation potentially tmrw WHICH I ONLY JUST REMEMBERED ; short seminar quiz to do before friday ;#latin club “homework” which im probably gonna tell my friend i cant continue w bc my weekly workload is already too overwhelming w 3 courses#+ i have to have by thrice yearly lunch w my evangelical godmother which means 3 hour convo half dedicated to getting me to abandon judaism#and half to getting me to repent my sinful homosexual ways and go back to being a nice straight girl#all of which is going to happen in public and she WILL tear up at multiple points of the conversation and it WILL be supremely awkward#when people inevitably start eavesdropping bc let's be real if i were at a cafe overhearing this convo i would be listening in too#and everyone's like 'ugh why dont you just tell her to fuck off' but im the only trans person and the only observant jew she has ever met#two groups against which she already has so many preconceived notions so like. idk it feels like my responsibility#as someone who knows her and who she acc cares about (vs a stranger) to try and give her a different perspective on these things ???#like if me being patient and calmly explaining why i transitioned/why i converted can stop her even slightly from sliding even further right#(and like she's Right Wing like covid denial right wing)#and if it might mean the next trans person or whtvr that she interacts with has it slightly easier then like. sure j can sit through#a couple irritating hours every few months#but its just suuuch a shit time for it like im meeting her thursday after class when i have a massive fucking assignment to hand in on sat#which FUCK gotta add that to the list#☞ annotated bibliography due saturday aka friday bc shabbos#okay okay. im done losing my mind in the notes 😵💫👍🏻#p.s.
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I used to be such a huge dog lover when I was younger...how things change LMAO
#istill love dogs but. i enjoy cats more#i didnt care abt cats +none of my family members were cat ppl until#one day when i was helping my mum weed the bàckyard a fluffy white cat came over the fence Nd#started rubbjng against my leg and purring and let me pat them and there name was snowball or snowflake and i was converted#i started reading warriors which made it worse and would beg my mum for a cat all the time#and then when we got my first cat she also became a cat lady lol
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the most accurate one I've heard is louis in endgame my god I'm a sucker for him rapping (who am I kidding I'm a sucker for everything louis but anyway)
https://twitter.com/tdefenseless28/status/1689369934046932993?t=ByamAQCgmkHGGmTvh3zmcA&s=19
why is this perfect
#i cant keep converting every ai cover of him to mp3 i cant i hate ai#its against my ethics#but why does he sound perfect why
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i used to make my sunday school teacher so angry back when my mom forced me to go to church, bc i would question everything. and point out how this one part of the bible contradicts this other part of the bible. and the response i usually got was the rules in the new testament were the ones that counted. so i asked why we still had to follow the ten commandments. and they did not like that. and the thing was, i wasn't actively trying to be malicious or anything. i was a kid trying to understand why so many people worshiped this god, that to me seemed jealous and petty and cruel. bc i never actually believed in any of it. i pretended to, bc my mom did and the way church would talk about non-believers made me not feel like it was safe to admit that to her. american christianty is a cult. a very popular cult, but it's a fucking cult.
#i hate the way the church fucks kids up#like being told sinners go to hell and then being told even thinking about doing something 'bad' was a sin#that fucks kids up#and it brainwashes them#obviously there are exceptions#i've heard of churches that are getting more accepting and progressive#and that don't teach the thought=sin thing#but they are NOT anywhere around here#i'm in a rural ass conservative af town#i'm talking churches that literally say being lgbt is a sin against god#anyway#i'm just ranting#there is a church literally next door to my house#bc that's what it's like in the bible belt#and i like don't have problems with people worshiping whatever god they want#but when they try to judge me based on their morals that's fucked up#also i want people to stop trying to convert me#i'm so tired of people hearing i don't go to church and inviting me to there's#like hello this is the bible belt#you can throw a rock and hit a church#they are everywhere#if i'm not going to one it's bc i don't want to#idk why my religious trauma is on my mind today
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#how do i express that while it is not realistic or even desirable for everyone to strive for a monastic life or a life dedicated to pacifism#i think it's actually a really fucking important perspective to exist in the world. we need true pacifists among us. not all of us. but som#not everyone can or should dedicate themselves to meditating on and preserving the inherent sacredness of life BUT SOMEONE HAS TO.#i see a lot on here about how it's not immoral and is in fact necessary to fight back against bigotry by any means necessary#but i am of the opinion that it goes both ways.#i think it's stupid and naive and self important to believe that fighting against oppression and establishing peace are one and the same#individualism has poisoned you guys so bad that you're walking around thinking that there's a specific philosophy or mindset#that is the opposite of oppression and that every progressive should eventually arrive at. it isn't true. it doesn't exist.#that's my problem with [redacted] too but yall aren't ready for that one.#you guys are full of ideas that you think are new and radical but are irrevocably based in a western perspective#diversity in society means diversity in mentality.#someone who commits themselves to doing no harm to anyone or anything ever is not an inherent enemy or in antithesis to leftism.#this feels like such a 'making up a guy to get mad at' thing as im typing it but i don't think it is.#i think it's dishearteningly common for passionate and angry progressive fighters to assert that the only way to make a better world#is for everyone to feel and think and act like them and throw out or convert anyone who doesn't.#i don't think it's productive. i think it alienates and individualizes people who ultimately want the same ends and should be collaborating#okay im done now
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