#i was able to do it because i cared a lot about the project!!

[chlobliviate]

Wolfstar Microfic - Dementor

Words: 982

@wolfstarmicrofic

🌙✨🌙✨🌙

Remus couldn’t sleep. Something was wrong. He rolled over, taking in the vast empty space on the other side of the bed. He’d known Sirius for ten years. He could be impulsive, arrogant and sometimes even just mean. What he also was, though, was loyal. To a fault, sometimes. Remus just couldn’t recognise the man that he loved in the accusations lodged against him.

Something was very wrong.

He got out of bed, wincing as his bare feet hit the cold floor. If Sirius had been working for Voldemort, there must be something in their flat to verify that. He started in the spare room, which had originally been Sirius’ room until they realised that he hadn’t slept in there for three months, at which point it became the spare room. It still had a lot of Sirius’ stuff in there, though. In boxes under the bed and the wardrobe. There was a lot to go through.

He started under the bed. He found twelve photo albums, which he couldn’t face looking through, and a box full of very racy-looking romance novels. Maybe this wasn’t a good idea, but what was the alternative? Just accept that the man who had kissed him on the forehead and told Remus that he was his whole world two days ago had conspired against them and been responsible for the death of three of their closest friends?

The next box Remus pulled out made him stop. In it was a small black chest with an inscription on the lid.

‘This chest, much like mine, will only open for you, Moons.’

Remus choked back a sob as he lifted the chest onto the bed. He ran his finger across the inscription and heard something click within. He was able to open it. He took a deep breath before looking inside. There were several photos of the two of them that Remus was quite glad that Sirius hadn’t put in a photo album and two envelopes.

He opened the first envelope. It was a contract. A contract that passed the role of secret-keeper from Sirius to Peter, and it was dated four months prior. Remus’ head was spinning. That was Pete’s signature, and he could tell from the paper that it had been magically signed too. He needed to take this to Dumbledore, or the Ministry. Someone who could tell if this was real or not. Then he noted the signature of the witness to the contract. Dumbledore. He knew. This made no sense.

He opened the second envelope, hoping for a miracle.

20th September 1981

Dear Moony,

I assume that if you’re reading this, then it’s likely something has happened to me, or maybe you’re just nosier than I thought you were.

I think Pete is the traitor. He became Prongs and Lily’s secret keeper back in June (see attached contract) because he convinced us all that I would be the obvious choice and Voldemort would never suspect him.

Since then I’ve noticed that anything that Pete knows quickly becomes used against the Order. Pete knew that Marlene and her sister would be with their parents last Friday. Only Pete, Dumbledore and I knew that. I certainly didn’t tell anyone, and it would surprise me if Dumbledore did. So that leaves Peter or a very lucky guess from the Death Eaters.

He’s also been in my ear about you. He’s been saying for months how suspicious it is that we aren’t told about your missions in meetings, and how many meetings you miss. I know you, as I hope you know me, and I know that you would never do this.

I have expressed my worries about this to Dumbledore, who knows that Pete is the secret keeper now. He told me that I was being paranoid and that J, L and H are perfectly safe. I hope that’s still the case when you read this.

If something has happened to me, look into Peter. I don’t think Dumbledore will care, so see if Moody will.

I hope I get to see you again.

I love you.

Padfoot

Remus didn’t hesitate before apparating to the Aurors offices.

Alastor Moody got on well with Remus and when he showed up looking distraught in the middle of his night shift, he leapt into action. He took the information from Remus, verified the magic signatures on the contract as belonging to Sirius, Peter and Dumbledore, and left the room. Remus sat in the offices for what felt like weeks, but the sun hadn’t even risen yet. Kingsley had sat with him for a while, telling him what Moody was working on, but Remus couldn’t take much of it in.

Moody appeared after several more long hours. “Remus. We’ve done magical trace tests on the finger we found at the scene. He did that to himself.”

“What are you saying, Alastor?” Remus asked, not wanting to hope too much.

“I’m saying that your man is being released from Azkaban as we speak. The dementors don’t like it, but it’s not their decision. This never should have happened. Shit. He should have had a trial, I’m so sorry. I don’t know how we missed this.”

Remus shook his head, “Dumbledore knew the whole time.”

Moody nodded, “I know. That’s something I urgently need to look into, but I needed to right the wrong first. He’s only been there for a day and a half, but the dementors…”

“I know. I’ll look after him.” Remus said as the fireplace glowed and two men stepped out. Sirius looked pale and his eyes were unfocused. Remus stumbled to his feet and pulled Sirius to him.

“Moons?” His voice was hoarse.

“I’ve got you. You’re alright.” Remus whispered into his hair. “You’re safe.”

“It wasn’t me.”

“I know, love. I found your letter.” Remus kissed the side of Sirius’ head. “I never believed it was you.”

[kafus]

i really think the best way to learn to code as a hobbyist is to just… start projects you don’t know how to do. being careful not to be too overwhelmingly ambitious of course, starting small is good, but at least personally, it’s very engaging to sit down to code something, not know how to do it, and pick up new skills while doing the research necessary to make the thing. and then at the end you have the thing you wanted to make!

[magentagalaxies]

vent incoming:

got my grades back for my courses last semester and most of it was to be expected, mostly A's, maybe an A-, etc. but i honestly can't get over the fact that my independent study (the buddy cole documentary) was for some reason given a B. like sure getting a B isn't bad per se, I usually get at least one B every semester and i honestly don't really care about what my exact gpa is as long as i can graduate, but come on. this school put me through months of psychological torment over this project and didn't even have the nerve to give me a B+??? i'm still coping with the self-doubt they forced on me and this bullshit is not helping!!

[hedgehog-moss]

Last spring my neighbour asked if I could let Pirlouit mow the grass around his barn from time to time, which Pirou was happy to do at first but if I left him there several days in a row he got pretty sad about being alone (lots of wistful, melancholy braying). So this year when my donkey was hired for this job again, I went for a different formula: for the past few weeks I've been bringing all the animals to the neighbour's barn for an hour of landscaping services now and then at apéritif time.

The fence is extremely not Pampe-proof so I have to have my apéritif while sitting on the road in a strategic position from which I can toss a stick in her direction if she tries to escape, but other than that I've been really enjoying this peaceful evening ritual, just sitting there reading and watching the animals while feeling like I'm doing my neighbour a favour. Pirlouit doesn't get all the grass to himself anymore but I've learnt that he prefers to be rich in friends than in food.

You'll notice that Merricat is present in every photo, looking alert. She too has been hired, but for the thankless job of Thought Police. She may look like she's just napping on the warm asphalt with not a care in the world...

... but she is working! Keeping an eye on the llamas, always.

I've discovered that in a specific context my three cats can act as precogs and warn me of Pampe's future crimes. My theory is that they developed this skill because of Poldine, who loves cats. Any cat who enters the pasture will soon be noticed and (lovingly) chased by Poldine, who wants kisses. Cats not only do not want llama kisses, they don't differentiate between individual llamas. They are all potential kissers. So even if it looks like she's all relaxed, Merricat is constantly monitoring where the llamas are and what they seem to be planning. If we are on the other side of a fence and Pampe approaches it a bit too slyly, Merricat will jump to her feet, ready to flee (and I will toss one of my anti-Pampe sticks, and say NON.)

Merricat and I are a very good team! We've foiled several of Pampe's plots, but we need to be on the road for Merricat to remain wary (if we were in the pen Pampe's escape attempts would involve getting away from us and the cat wouldn't care.) Cars are rare so it's okay (plus it's so quiet you can always hear them coming), and on the few occasions when someone showed up and asked why I was having apéritif on the road, I pointed at Pampe and they were like, "Ah! Didn't see her here. Good luck!"

"Hedgehog-moss, you're exaggerating. Pampe can't be that—"

She is! She is. And she always seems to notice when Merricat is on a bathroom break and I'm absorbed in a book.

There was one evening though, when she got distracted by a fascinating new idea. I don't claim to know what's going on in this llama's head (except when she's looking at a fence, then it's easy) but as you can see, once I brought the animals to the barn Poldine started eating flowers, Pirlouit started eating grass, and Pampe started eating the wall.

After a moment she slowly circled the barn, then stopped and lay down right next to it, settling down in a comfortable position but with focused ears and her head still turned towards the wall. It was suspicious behaviour, but on the other hand she now looked so uninterested in the road that I decided to take a risk and run home to bring back some dinner—and she didn't move while I was away! I even brought Pandolf, who is usually banned from these soirées because he would disturb my Merricat alarm system. He was happy to be finally included.

It's unclear if Pampe was eating the wall, talking to the wall, or carefully examining various parts of the wall as Step 1 of 27 of a complex plan only she understands, but she stuck close to the barn all evening instead of lying in wait by the fence so I was able to have a picnic in the grass rather than on the road, which felt more bucolic. I know that "Pampérigouste has a new, mysterious project" is a worrying sentence but at this early stage (feasibility study) it felt to me and Merricat like a little holiday!

[star-anise]

Warnings: Doomerism, climate grief, child death

The thing about having studied history and the psychology of trauma so much is that I can't pretend to myself that the world used to be better at sometime in the past.

Don't get me wrong; things are absolutely terrible right now and need to change, quickly.

But also, they're better than they've ever been for us as a species. It is literally mindblowing how much worse life was for us historically.

Have you seen one of those charts of the human population over time? Have you thought about what it actually means?

Because here's what I see: Humans have always loved things like living to old age, like having sex, like raising babies. Those are things we have always wanted to do. It's not like pre-industrial humans were giant pandas like, "Nah, rather not reproduce as a species. No thanks," and suddenly the Victorians discovered horniness.

Instead, for most of human history, we have died. At terrifically young ages. The few who made it to adulthood could make babies as much as they liked, and then overwhelmingly watched pregnancies miscarry, births end in tragedy, or babies die. Their own lives were constantly at the mercy of a world that could kill them without a second thought. To be human meant to live in a world full of a million little tragedies, all the goddamn time.

And then what happened was: The babies stopped dying. The effects of a lot of things from higher agricultural yields to public health efforts to mass communications made us the master over the diseases and maladies that once had us by the throat.

When we look ahead at catastrophe and terrors, yes, they're bad. But they'd have to be extremely bad indeed to measure up to the number of people who wouldn't even be alive in any other century.

And even the obvious bogeyman then, overpopulation—did you notice what's already happened? On that chart, there's the green measure of total population, but the thin purple line is the rate of population growth. Please notice that it peaked in 1968. It is, in fact, projected as entirely possible that within a century it could go lower than it was twelve thousand years ago, at the end of the last big ice age.

The moment babies started to live longer, people went, "That is too many babies. An absolutely unsustainable number of babies. People are crying out for help because taking care of that many children is completely overwhelming. We need to be able to fix this problem," and they invented birth control and fought to get it legalized. It hit the market in the late 1950s and in less than a decade, it had caught on like wildfire.

To me, this is the absolute opposite of an argument for passivity and political inaction. It's not that everything's going to be okay so why even try. It's that as it turns out, the human capacity to grow and thrive and make the world better is absolutely reality-defying. I don't have faith that all of our problems will be solved, but I do have faith that those problems are all the subject of passionate obsession of millions of people.

And apparently we have a really strong track record at that kind of thing already.

[evilminji]

Okay, so maybe it's just me? Projecting my new Tea Phase?

Cause for med reasons, no more energy drinks, only Teeeeeeaaaaa~☆

But honestly? Now that I am an adult and ACTUALLY KNOW HOW TO MAKE IT? Really digging it! Am enjoying the Teas. Mmmmmmm~ leaf broth. I like the fruity ones.

So! IMAGINE~☆ If you will:

Danny. 14 and his parents are LOUD AS FUCK (CRASH BANG SMASH BANG WHIIII-) dispite it being, once again, a school night. This has been going one For Years. That STUPID fucking machine. All God damned hours. Crashes and bangs and powertools. Explosions.

When will it ever end!

He's... he's honestly used it.

Unknowingly? This is is a skill that will come in handy later. Living and functioning while sleep deprived. Healthy? Fuck no. But it's USEFUL. He IS the ten year old downing Monster drinks in the parking lot before school.

It makes him a jittery weirdo. Twitchy. Too much caffeine, not enough sleep, his parents either blew up or TOOK APART the washing machine AGAIN. He... he never stood a chance. It's a miracle the indoor plumbing hasn't been compromised yet... AGAIN.

His blood is more sugar, caffeine, and guarana or whatever those other things in the can are, then actual human blood. He doesn't CARE. He just needs too get decent grades, graduate, and become an astronaut. It's... it's FINE. This is normal. They're FINE.

(If they weren't... someone would have noticed, right? Would have DONE something. Cared. So it HAS to be fine. His family's just weird. It's FINE.)

But THEN...

The Accident.

And his biology CHANGES. Green goo, wrapped vicious and loving, around his very DNA. Like Kintsugi of the body and soul. In green, Green, GREEN. It... it's a lot. Everything changing all at once. Maybe that's why it takes him so long to notice.

Why he thinks "oh, I'm just tired cause I'm running more then usual. Fighting and flying. Doing ghost stuff."

When... when honestly? Some part of him always kinda KNEW. From the very moment he stumbled out of the portal. The aftershocks. The pain. Sam and Tucker crying, scrambling to help him up the stairs. Sam tearing her bag apart looking for her cramps medicine. Because... because pain medication is pain medication.

"It's gonna be okay, Danny. Please. Please god, just take it! I promise it's gonna be okay!"

How do you look your panicked, crying, strongest-person-you-know best friend in the eyes and tell her... you can FEEL it dissolving in your throat. Like the pills were dumped in a human shaped pot of acid. That... that the pain isn't changing... and you... you don't think it's going too.

When you're scared. Might be dying. And you can already tell they think it's their fault. W... when you're all just KIDS. And all you can think is... you can let them know how bad... how bad it hurts...

They'd never be able to live with that knowledge.

Yeah. Yeah, Sam. Thanks. T... The pills helped a lot. He feels better. You really saved the day. He lo... loves you guys so much.

...

.....

He thinks about that moment A LOT. About how much he realized and knew, before the denial kicked in. Before he got so... Tired. Fresh of all that energy. And? You'd think he realize. The mood swings. The irritability. The headaches that disappear the SECOND he goes ghost. That he's in caffeine withdrawal. But? Nope.

He kinda blames the constant ghost attacks for distracting him.

But see... Sam? Doesn't drink tea. Goes against her diet. Tucker was where he GOT his illicit borderline illegal energy drinks. And his sister? Big on flavored sparkling waters. Which are gross to him.

His PARENTS drink a thick tar they insist is coffee. It might be liquid fudge. Zone knows its nearly the same consistency. It's horrifying. No thanks, he wants to LIVE.

It's? Ironically? Mr. Lancer and his constant detentions, that help Danny realize somethings up. Because Mr. Lancer shares. If he makes a cup for himself, he'll make one for you. It's how he was raised. And, yeah, the after school detentions? Those were herbal blends. No caffeine.

But...

But they tasted nice. Were warm. The classroom was quiet and as frustrating as it was? The tea itself? Was always... the one exception to how shit the situation was. So Danny finally broke down and asked about it. Learned Mr. Lancer knew a? Surprisingly LOT about tea. Huh.

Then one day he gets SATURDAY detention. Oh joy!

Bright and early. One of the few times he could be trying, desperately, to be sleeping through his parents cacophony. Catching up on his desperately needed Zzz's. Here he is... getting a handed a new cup of different tea?

Breakfast blend? And a bagel..

N...none hostile breakfast? A quiet space to catch up on his homework? No Dash? Just... just a quiet classroom, some tea, and the sounds on a peaceful morning outside?

......oh.

It's the best time he's had in school in... God, in YEARS. He gets so MUCH done. For once can concentrate. And? Actually, now that he thinks about it? Feels... awake? Or at the very least, not as sleepy. And being a Fenton, whom to the LAST are a genius if eccentric family, it's pretty damn easy to put two and two together.

Tea.

He felt more awake after having Lancer's breakfast blend tea.

He obviously asks about it. Then, after detention is done. Calm packs up. Goes home. Drops his back in his room. Goes ghost. And SHOOTS for the Far Frozen with his phone and an energy drink. Because clearly he's missing something and it's time to ask.

The good doctors of the Frozen are... gently horrified. Clawed hands steeples infront of their mouths as they try to tactfully figure out how to word "Great One, WHAT THE FUCK!?!? Why would you DO THIS TO YOURSELF!?" Because that... is not professional. Breathe. In, out, in, out. We can do this.

They get the most patient and restrained of their elders to... CALMLY, very VERY Calmly, ask some medical questions. Listen. Without judgements! Because they are medical professionals. Who do NOT want to scream, forever, into the void. Certainly not. So Calm! (They are going to BURN THAT CAN IN-)

Which! Huh. Yeah, that explains the constant exhaustion. He was poisoning himself. Kinda. Not so much the GHOST but the human half. Putting to much strain and too much trace chemicals, minerals, and buckets of sugar. General "mmmm :/ Don't Like THAT ™" energy from the Goo causing it too try and constantly burning it all out of existence. Endlessly.

The more he put in, the more there was to burn. The more there was to burn, the more tired he became. The more tired he became... well, the more he put in. It was a slowly lethal starvation cycle. Big Yikes.

The TEA on the other hand? Those are leaves. The good recognizes leaves and water. Other various plants, dried or otherwise. It ignores them as "fine" until they reach a "problematic" threshold, apparently? So... *blank look at the doctor*

*sighs in medical professional*

Tea? Good. Satan Can of Halfa Poison? Bad. Please drink tea.

👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

And it's like MAGIC. He's suddenly BACK, baby! Ha ha ha! Skulker you fuckin THOUGHT?! Oh it's 2am? Well SUPRISE bitch! He's bright eyed and bushy tailed! His grades are up AND he's beating you like a drum! He has ice breakers for old people discussions now!! The local Tea Shops have NEVER been so well protected.

He actually manages to graduate with not just decent grades? But GOOD ones.

And the second. The INSTANT. He is legally his own man? Has his important paperwork squirrelled away and the go bags safely WELL outside of Amity. It's time. He meets OUTSIDE the house, because he's not an idiot. He's been practicing his Clones and has them ready to grab his parents so he can get out of there alive. Jazz is on video call from Star city.

His parents... suspected. Not at first, but as goofy as they are? They aren't ACTUALLY idiots. They've been watching, going over old research. Trying, failing, to get in touch with the League to have THEIR team test their research. Peer review is critical after all. They... they had been so certain. Are still somewhat certain.

But their research doesn't exactly ACCOUNT for this "halfa" phenomenon. So, there is a very real chance they are missing something. The one thing the DO know? Danny is their son. Stuck in some eternal mortally wounded state or not, he is a hero. And they weren't there for him.

They can't change their beliefs on a dime. But they've clearly missed a great deal. And refuse to fall to academic bias. The very thing that got them LAUGHED AT for decades. Mocked and belittled. This is their life's work. By God they WILL find out the truth.

It's? Better then he could have hoped. Not perfect. But better.

He helps set up safeties and a security check point at the portal. Both sides. He's kinda a big deal these days, mom, dad. Ghost scientists eager to work with them. A whole TEAM under their command. It certain endears ghosts to them a whole lot more. Then?

Copy of the blue prints, go bag turned into normal bags, Danny's off to college.

Bounces from major to major. Nothing really capturing his interest. As he aged, he's need less sleep. Gotten stronger. Grown into his father's height and grandfathers build. Tucker keeps calling him a dorito. Danny retaliates with Ancient Egyptian Cyber/Pharoah Twink allegations. According to SAM they are both dumbasses.

She's not WRONG... but hey D:<

Eventually? A really niche botany seminar run by Pamela Isely catches the attention of Tucker, who forwards it to him n Sam. Nice ™. It's being held in her Murder Park! Cool! Obviously they have to go. So off to Gotham they go. And? When they get there? Sam is APPALLED.

She may HATE landlords as much as the next activist.... but LOOK at all these run down, foreclosed, rotting buildings! Beautiful gothic infrastructure! Those could be businesses or homes! Danny, busy with signing them up, makes the mistake of tuning her out as she rants in fury. She does this some times. Needs to vent. Uh huh, you're very right. You should contact somebody. I agree. Mmmhmmm.

Hey, Sam, Ms. Isely needs your-....

Sam?

Oh FUCK ™.

By the time the Seminar come around? Sam has violently kicked in the door of more then a feel reality offices. Owns QUITE a few buildings. Danny is sweating. She... she's doing the THING again. The "gimme your Ghost Crew, I KNOW you have a highly specific Ghost Crew, don't you DARE lie to me or I take your knee caps, Danny" stare.

>.> Sam you can't keep doin- *stare intensifies* Yes Ma'am. *Pulls out Fenton phone* and so? Here come the renovation crew. The ONLY honest building Crew in all of Gotham. They cut no corners. Can't be threatened. Gangs, villians, and even local government office try to arrange... accidents on the build sites.

Nothing. Nada. In fact, it turns out more dangerous for THEM then this crew of outsiders!

Wtf!

Then? After these two College age weirdos finish Poison Fuckin Ivys HIGHLY SUSPECT biology seminar? Manson fucks off to who knows where! Leaving what HAS to be "the muscle" behind. Cause I mean? Look, at the guy! He's huge! And what does he do?

Goes building to building. Rents them out to low income families. Honest, hard working shop keepers. And? Eventually decides to settle smack dab in the middle of Gotham, in the shadow of Wayne fuckin tower, spitting distance from the Space museum..... and open? A tea shop? The FUCK?

"The Zone".

In a weird shade of green. With little ghosts, wearing crowns, because and I quote "it's funny"? Certainly crazy enough for Gotham. But like, it's loud as FUCK here. Crowded. There are gas attacks and shit. It'll never las-....

It stays untouched for MONTHS.

Sometimes being the ONLY building near it to be untouched. Gas NEVER getting in. The damn place a BUNKER. And? Despite looking like it's two floors? It's three. You enter and your actually on the second floor. No one's even sure where the fuck the guy LIVES, since he never seems to leave.

Not only THAT. But it... it's like one of those old school apothecaries. Big ol bank of drawers. Guy'll mix up your blend for you right as you watch. Tea nuts are actually risking COMING to Gotham to try his stuff. Writing articles. Apparently he has some pretty rare shit in those drawers.

Some UNKNOWN shit, according to one guy on ViewTube.

There's this whole debate on if it's Ultra Super Rare or that means it's just super cheap knock off crap. Some of them he won't make for people, even if they ask. There's a rumor it's for Meta's with specific diets. Or alien blends. But no one can verify that. Cause like?

Anyone who tries to cause trouble?

Can't fucking FIND the place. And if you're already inside? You just... drop. Stone cold unconscious. It's definitely magic but no one knows if it's HIS or Manson's? You know? He won't talk. Gets annoyed when harrased.

Which off course!

Leaves Only ONE gentleman for the job. An elite special forces trained expert. Polite, dignified, enjoyer of fine Teas. Alfred "Why do you chucklefucks keep forgetting I was in the Queens Service and a Registered Badass" Pennyworth.

After all! He DOES have the days shopping to do.

@babbling-babull @the-witchhunter @hdgnj @legitimatesatanspawn @lolottes

[cashmoneyyysstuff]

you wonder how todoroki shoto is doing.

you remember him being the boy that sat a row away from you in class. he always kept to himself, never raising his hand to answer questions but always able to answer when he was called on. also, he was endeavor's son.

even if most of the parents at your private school where big shot's, apparently endeavor was in a league of his own. and so was his son, apparently.

nobody even dared talking to the todoroki son, and neither did you, but you liked looking at him. he's always so meticulous and calm as opposed to your rowdier louder classmate's. despite his quieter presence he always seemed to stand out to you. his bag is big enough to carry everything he needs without having to shove anything inside or leaving it half opened. he wipes his mouth with a tissue after he's done eating his lunch alone and his handwriting is pretty. his lashes are long and he's pretty.

you remember being partnered up with him for a class project once. he'd immediately cut to the chase and split the work for the both of you, clearly not humoring your attempts of starting conversation.

slowly though, you start getting him to stay behind to talk to you a little longer after the bell rings until he invites you to get your work done in the library, just to get your work done. until you ask him about his favorite colour and he doesn't know, so he asks you yours. and then you ask him about his favorite ice cream flavour, he says he doesn't have sweets a lot and he asks you yours. and you keep talking and he keeps listening and asking. you ask him if it doesn't bother him that you're talking so much but he says he doesn't mind.

you liked spending time at the library talking with shoto and you think he enjoyed listening to you. you liked riding your bike home with him while he walked next you, before he agreed to ride on it with you sometimes, but one time you both fell off and you hurt your knee, and he promised to never get on again if it meant you getting hurt while carrying you on his back. you remember him smelling really nice and you tightening your arms around his neck and nuzzling into him, and his grip on you tightening as well.

you liked holding his left hand when it got cold out even though he didn't like it much, but he'd do it for you. you liked it when you got to switch seats and sit next to him and you think he liked sitting next to you. you didn't see shouto smile often, but he did when he was with you and you liked that. and you think he liked that too.

you think so at least. you hope so, because when break was over he was gone.

you'd heard he got pulled out of school, some other people just said he'd switched, to go to a better cooler private school. you hated it when people said that because the shoto you knew wasn't like that. he knew people talked about him and he hated being associated with his father. he likes the caramel you sneak in for him at school and you like the way his eyes light up when he guesses the flavour of fruit candies you make him taste. the shoto you know that ties your shoes for you and shares his umbrella with you, the one who half heartedly stomps into wet puddles with you, the one with the pretty lashes and pretty smile and pretty handwriting isn't like that.

and you wished you could've asked him where he went, and why he went and took his warmth for snowy winter days with him, but you couldn't because he didn't have a phone and neither did you. you weren't old enough for one yet and you'd told him that as soon as you'd turn thirteen he'd be the first contact in your phone and he'd smiled.

you couldn't do that anymore. and you wonder how he's doing four years later.

you don't very much, but you think about him sometimes when his soft hair and pretty eyes cross your mind. he never cared for his looks much even after being voted the most handsome boy by the girls in class.

"i didn't know people thought i was..handsome." he ponders, scratching at the corner of his paper with his pencil. you kick your legs in the air where you're sitting next to him, you pout.

"why not ?"

"because..my scar.." he trails off, he keeps erasing at a spot he'd already wiped the pencil lead off of. you lean in so you get into his field of vision and he leans back a bit with widened eyes before leaning in towards you again, you're forwardness always took him by surprise.

"nuh-uhn, the others say it makes you look even more handsome !" you reassure and he blinks.

"do you think i'm handsome ?" he asks, tilting his head cutely. you splutter and feel your face heat up.

"e-everyone does.."

"do you ?" he leans closer.

you gulp, gripping your chair you turn your head away from his to the side and nod. you get the courage to peek up at him and you're surprised to see a smile pulling at his lips and a light tint of pink on his face.

"that's good." is all he says, but you feel so much warmth swarming through you, and you think he does, too.

so you wonder where he is and you wonder how he's doing. you wonder if he has any new friends or if his most handsome boy award got him a girlfriend. you wonder if he truly felt the same way you did way back then and if he liked holding your hand just as much is you did his because it was warm but also because it was his. and you wonder if he thinks about you.

except you don't have to wonder anymore. because on your first day at your new school, he walks into class. his eyes widen when he locks eyes with you and you recognize him, and you think he does too.

[charsthearcher]

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･Storage Closet #4

freshman fem!reader x senior!emily engstler

warnings: allusions to sex, grinding, dirty talk, swearing, age gap, reader is perceived to be shorter than emily, petnames, highschool setting, use of ma (im sorry but emily is such a hey mamas fight with the wall) i think thats all lmk if i missed any

a/n: if you feel like youve read this before on wattpad or something, you probably have.. I CHANGED MOST OF IT BUT STORY LINES THE SAME. it was originally about.. uh.. taylor swift.. WHAT WHO SAID THAT???? if you find any taylor instead of emily lmk!!!

You sighed as you stepped through the doors to your highschool, dreading the day ahead. 

Sure, you liked school. You had good friends, nice teachers and outstanding grades, but today just wasnt your day. You showed up in a hoodie and shorts that mightve been a little short but you couldnt care less. Your hair was pulled into a ponytail with stray hairs poking out.

You heard your name echo through the hall, “Over here!” Your friend Gemma shouted across the hallway. Her and your friends were standing over by your cluster of lockers.

"Hey guys," You began taking books out of your locker for your first class, Math. 

"Sucks we dont have any classes together today." Kayla huffed. "Still meet up for lunch though?" She asked eyebrows raised at you.

You would rarely eat lunch with them nowadays. Its not because you didnt want to, you just had other things to do.

"Ill try." You fake smiled. The bell rang and you slammed your locker shut before saying your farewells to your friends, heading off to your class.

A familiar voice called out to you right before you walked into your class. You spun around and were greeted with a face from your english class. You didnt know too many people in your english class. After all you were a freshman taking the senior AP english classes. (tbh idk how american school works so sorry!)

But this one blonde you did know. Emily had taken care of you ever since you were placed in her class. You two often partnered for projects and partner work. Well more like you do the work and Emily annoys the shit out of you.

"You do the english homework?" She asked a smirk on her face. 

"Im assuming you 'forgot' again?" You asked grabbing your backpack and searching for the homework.

"Something like that." She laughed as you handed over your homework. You didnt mind helping her, after all she was the nicest to you in class. She would help you. A lot.

"Dont forget to bring it back before 7th period." You warned.

"I wont. Bye baby!" She cooed making fun of your age, walking backwards down the hall catching your reaction.

"Bye Emily." You laughed as she turned around with a skip in her step. You sighed as she turned the corner, gathering your thoughts until finally entering your class.

—————————

It was finally 7th period which meant one more hour to go. You were able to have lunch with your friends which put your mood up a bit.

You were sat at your desk at the side of the room, listening to the teacher blabber on about a project you had to do on a book of choice.

"And you will be needing partners for this." He announced. 

You groaned knowing who you would have to partner with. You never got any work done when you worked with her. 

You glanced over to Emily as she winked at you. You whipped your head back to the front as to not let her see the flush on your cheeks. 

After your teacher was finished, he said you and your partner could discuss what books you could do. Emily stalked her way over to your desk pulling herself up a chair.

"What book are we doing?" She asked.

"What book do you want to do?" You asked back.

"I havent read many books." She shrugged.

"How exactly are you in AP English?" 

"I have a way with my words." She winked again. That stupid charm she has.

You sighed and used your hands to push you up from your chair, gesturing Emily to come with you.

"Sir, could me and Emily please head over to the library to check out a copy of our book?" You asked at your teachers desk smiling.

"Sure. dont take too long, yes?" 

"Yes sir." you and Emily said in unison.

You lead the way out of the classroom before walking the complete opposite direction of the library.

Emily shook her head laughing quietly as she followed you, sensing your idea.

You stopped at a closet with a title reading: Storage Closet #4. You peered around to see if anybody was around before quickly opening the door and pulling Emily inside.

"What exactly do you plan to do in here?" She said raising an eyebrow.

"Oh shut up." You said pulling her head down to yours taking her lips in a kiss. Her hands found home around your waist as you wrapped you arms around her neck. She pushed you up agaisnt the wall pulling one of your thighs up.

Her tounge pried your lips open, exploring your mouth as though shed have no other chance.

She pulled away for a moment before placing hard kisses on your neck and you groaned.

"Fuck, I dont think we are going to be able to do this project." You panted.

You didnt know how this happend. You never thought of highschool and thought you would be making out with a hot senior in a storage closet. 

Near the beginning of the year Emily offered to partner with you for the first project to save you the embarrassment of having to work with the teacher.

She would always flirt with you while studying, eyes gauging your reaction to her jokingly (not) flirty comments. She would wait for your cheeks to turn that maroon color she grew to love so much then tease the hell out of you for it.

Eventually she teased you enough and you built up the courage to put some actions to her words. 

Sure, a 15 year old secretly hooking with a 18 year old was definitely wrong. But you and Emily took the risk. She would only ever speak to you around people if it related to school and same for you.

In private you could do whatever you wanted.

You two often went on road trips out of town so you could go on lunch dates without having to act like sisters or friends. In all honesty you enjoyed the secrecy of it all, it made it all so thrilling.

Emily pulled away gasping for air. "Shit." She laughed, eyes wide as she rubbed her thumb over a spot on your neck.

"What?" You asked pulling out your phone from your back pocket and opening camera.

"For fucks sake Emily!" You half heartedly scolded glaring at the reflection of a red and purple mark. "What will my mom think? Her 15 year old daughter coming home from school with a fat hickey?" You pulled your hair back to get a better view seeing it went darker.

You shoot daggers her way before she smirks playfully and kisses the mark. “Thats not gonna make it go away..” You grumbled.

She laughed and pulled you back into her, continuing the kiss. Her hands carresed your ass as you moaned softly into her mouth. "Sh, baby." she hushed into your lips.

As she bit and tugged and carresed, you two lost track of time. She slid a thigh in between your legs and you whimpered as she smirked, again.

You started moving your hips savouring the feeling of your barley covered centre rubbing up agaisnt the rough of her jeans.

"Go ahead pretty girl, use me. make yourself feel good." She whispered into your ear before nibbling at your lobe. God you loved when she talked in that same raspy voice.

The kiss became more and more lazy, teeth clashing and moans and groans echoing in the closet. Emily was no longer focused on the kiss but on the way your head was thrown back, eyes squeezed shut and mouth slightly agape.

You began rutting your hips more and more rapidly, chasing your high. Emily bit down on her lip watching you get yourself off. Right as you were on the edge she pulled her thigh away. Your eyes flung open and your eyebrows were furrowed.

"What the fuck?" You spat at her.

"Watch the mouth princess. Dont want to get on my bad side hm?" She said towering over you.

You gulped and looked away at her dominance. "I asked you a question ma." She whispered again lifting your chin with a single finger.

Words were no longer an option if you didnt want to humiliate yourself. So, you settled with a dumb shake of your head.

"We’ll finish this at mine later, yeah? Lets get back to class." And with that she slipped out of the closet leaving you breathless, as always. (and back to class with no book and a disapproved remark from your teahcer)

[sainns]

OBVIOUSLY.

𝓢.ㅤ he can't tell if you're joking or not.

SJYㅤ୨୧ ⠀ femreader⠀ . . .ㅤ fluff jake's pov reader's flirty ig you could say college au jake's a hashtag overthinker AND oblivious not proofread as usual sawryㅤ715 words

"you're, like, kind of gorgeous,"

"woah, what?" jake gapes at you from over his laptop screen. you're sitting across from him, supposed to be helping with the research for your project. your laptop isn't even out on the table, though, but he swears he saw you typing away five minutes ago.

you hum, "you are gorgeous, actually. not kind of,"

"is this— what are you talking about? this is so random," he lets out an amused breath, running his hand through his hair. he could feel his heart racing, "i don't usually get called gorgeous,"

"i was just making an observation," you reach forward, pushing his screen down a little, "do you wanna be called handsome instead? or pretty?"

he blinks, "well, no. i mean, i don't care,"

you nod, "okay,"

he expects you to say something else, but you don't, smiling at him instead as you pull out your phone, seemingly scrolling through instagram or maybe twitter. he can't really tell.

he doesn't understand you. you're honest— to an insane level. catching him off guard on more than one occasion, an instance from last year coming to the forefront of his mind.

you had told him how you would give up everything to be his girlfriend, and then you moved on like it was nothing.

it was confusing to him. he swears it's just your personality; you're honest and flirty, and you make jokes that sometimes don't feel like jokes (the girlfriend thing, for example). he knows they're jokes, though.

or at least he thinks he does.

sunghoon told him that you only act that way with him. you haven't ever told sunghoon you wished you were his girlfriend or that he was gorgeous.

"do you like me?"

you look up from your phone, your eyes wide and eyebrows raised in surprise at his sudden question. hell, even he was surprised at what he said— it was egotistical, thinking that someone likes you just because they complimented you, but he blames sunghoon and jay. they both put the idea in his head, and after your comment, he couldn't not ask.

if you said yes, he could ask you out. he'd ask you on a date and eventually ask you to be his girlfriend, and if you said no then . . . well, he doesn't know what he'd do.

he'd probably have to avoid you for a while, out of embarrassment. hopefully, you'll be able to move past that and be friends with him again.

you laugh— a small, shy laugh, like you're nervous— and you bring your hand up to wipe away an imaginary speck of dust on your skin. "obviously. i mean, i think it's obvious. is it not?"

"seriously?"

"yeah," you say, placing your phone down and leaning forward, "was it really not obvious?"

"i thought you were just playing around,"

you stare at him in disbelief. "jake, i kiss you all the time,"

his face heats up at your reminder. you do kiss him all the time, among other things. now that he's thinking about it, the two of you have a pretty physical relationship.

"on the cheek! i figured you were a touchy person. do you really like me?"

"oh my god, jake. yes, i like you. a lot. i don't do anything i do with you with anyone else,"

"oh, okay, cool cool," he taps his finger against the table, looking everywhere but you. he has no idea how to handle this information— how on earth did he not know you like him? he's going through your friendship, and you were, in fact, obvious about it.

"jake."

he blinks, "what?"

"do you like me?" you're staring at him, a little amused and annoyed at the same time.

"oh, sorry— yeah. yeah, i do. i do like you. do you wanna . . . fuck, can i be your boyfriend?"

you laugh once again, less shy and more teasing. his nervousness is making your nervousness go away, it looks like. he's glad that his lameness can bring you some joy, whereas he wants to go cry to sunghoon about how stupid he's being.

"sure. i did say i'd give up everything to be your girlfriend,"

then you give him the prettiest smile, and he thinks that he's simultaneously the luckiest and stupidest man in the universe.

note. i feel like this is bad and makes no sense but idc i just like oblivious jake and wanted to write smt for him :/

[lynxgriffin]

Hiatus Notice

Hi all, didn't want to make this post on my birthday, but I do need to do it now: I'm going to need to take a hiatus from drawing due to my wrist being hurt again.

Anyone who watches my streams knows that I still try and do my stretches while working all the time, so getting hurt again so badly that I can't work at all is nothing short of completely devastating to me. I have spent most of my time crying nonstop about it. All I can do now is the proper next steps...stop and rest, talk to my doctor about it, and hopefully get any physical or massage therapy I need so that I can recover and get back to work ASAP.

I don't know what my timetable for recovery would be right now, but I'm really hoping it's not as long as last time. I just know I won't be able to share any art until I'm better and can draw regularly again.

This just sucks because I already feel like I've been slow at things, and I had multiple things in the works...Eldritchrune comics, and also a project I was working on for the next anniversary. I apologize that it's going to be a wait before I can share any art again...even once I get back into drawing, my job still comes first.

I will update here more once I hopefully know what to do from my doctor, and I can still answer asks, but no art for awhile. I'm so sorry about the wait...trust me when I say this is my biggest nightmare, and I've been an emotional wreck about it.

And artists: please learn from my miseries and take care of yourselves, especially if you draw professionally. Take breaks, stretch frequently, drink lots of water, do NOT overwork, listen to your body, listen to your doctors and therapists. The world doesn't treat us as such, especially nowadays, but you are athletes. Take care of your body the same way an athlete would.

Thanks again for your patience.

[pixiecaps]

recapping a bit of what haru said on stream

haru on her stream spoke about how shes had a really awful past five years and all her experiences just from this past year has been incredible. she gave a massive thank you to everyone and that she has no regrets.

“i never imagined i’d be where i am right now and i mean it with all my heart thank you so much. i had a very good time and i hope to have made you guys happy.”

she mentioned that since she was young shes always wanted to make content that makes people happy because she felt the world was missing a lot of love so shes happy to have given the world a piece of her heart. she mentioned how shes met so many incredible people who motivated her to see the good parts of life. to have found even this little bit of sunshine has left her so grateful. she says thank you for all the kindness, all the moments, all the memories, all the words, everything. shes very happy and mentioned this has been a very special experience for her. she reminded her chat that theres always another day and to enjoy life to the maximum, to live, to love, to talk, to hug each other, to be happy always, and that all the beautiful happiness we’ve given her will be returned back to us. she continues to express her gratitude. she mentioned this is one of the most beautiful communities shes ever had the pleasure of meeting in the entire world. she goes on to include the spanish, portuguese, french, english, german, and korean community in that statement.

“there is love in all types of languages and that love needs to be shared.“

she said her words will never be enough to express all her gratitude. she gave a reminder to always keep being kind. her voice falters a couple times from all the emotions. she mentioned shes cried enough and didn’t want to keep crying since she had something to do tomorrow and she didnt wanna have swollen eyes lmao.

she then shares a more personal moment. paraphrasing here.

“after i lost my dad i swear i felt like my life was falling apart. i never thought i’d be able to recover. after that many things happened and in those things, i wasnt destined to meet two people, this is a story i’ll always remember because i wasnt destined to meet these people. … they tell me hey the actor for this little thing didn’t show up and i say no way seriously? tell them to let me be it, tell them please because i want to be with you guys (harus two friends who were apart of the project). and i didnt think they’d agree… and they said yes. and i met two very important people and honestly (starts crying) thank you so much. thank you so much nussa. thanks to you i was able to meet them. i never imagined this would happen i promise you. thank you nussa. it means a lot to me that you decided to put me (into the leo spot). the only major thing in my life, i started being so happy, i started enjoying all the moments in my life as if it were the last, thanks to all this i’m here. and could meet you all. such a beautiful community.” she goes on to keep thanking nussa while crying and saying it was written in the stars. she goes on to say that shes gonna tell this as a story some day to her family, who doesnt know what she does or that she streams, and she’ll tell them about all of this with so much care and love. shes very thankful to have learned so much english and more about so many different cultures. she again reiterates shes very happy.

she also teases that she wants to go to brazil!!!! which… might be soon… and that theres little things being planned so hopefully if all goes well…👀 (an egg admin meetup would go so hard)

NOW GO SUPPORT HER ON TWITCH @ HarumiVT

[miley1442111]

i wanna kiss you on the mouth -s.reid

----------------------------

----------------------------

a/n: i am back from the dead! hello, i was gone for the past few days because school and work is hectic but rest assured i am back :)

summary: both of you are completely unaware of your feelings, but you speak too loudly and your feelings are confessed.

pairing: spencer reid x bau! fem! reader

warnings: none

----------------------------

Spencer had only been thinking of you every day for the past 4 months. From the moment he woke up, to the second his head hit the pillow. You were on his mind. 

It’s weird he tried to convince himself. You were his childhood best friend, who’d just moved to Washington. You were a year older but just as intelligent, if not more, and you were conversational and interesting. You had people skills that he could only dream of, and a smile he could only dream of. Which he did. Dreamt of you a lot. Usually you were his girlfriend, or occasionally his wife. Sometimes you were clothed... others he wasn't exactly proud of. But it wasn't him technically, it was his subconscious. Right?

----------------------------

“We have a new case,” Penelope grimaced as you rolled your eyes, clearly hungover from the night prior. 

“Bad date?” Derek mused and Spencer’s muscles tensed. 

“I don’t even remember Derek, all I know is that I woke up in someone else’s bed,” you chuckled. 

“Cheating on me?” He mocked. 

“Always,” you smirked, lowering the sunglasses on your eyes to give him a wink, one which made him laugh. 

Spencer’s chest tightened. You were going out. You had casual sex. That was fine, you’re an adult. He shouldn’t be bothered. You two hadn’t spoken in years before you joined the BAU 4 months ago. 

“Pretty boy?” Derek repeated. “Are you alright? You’re not listening.”

“S-sorry! Just… thinking…” he trailed off as the conversation flowed again, ideas and questions filled the room as they continued the briefing. 

----------------------------

The jet was not much easier. You were smirking at your phone as the others napped or looked over the case file. 

“Who’s that?” Emily smirked, looking over your shoulder. 

“My maybe-boyfriend,” you smiled back as her face lit up. Spencer’s heart dropped. You barely look in his direction most days. You don’t talk to him. You clearly don’t care about him. Yet here he is, upset over the fact that you might have a boyfriend. “Kidding, my apartment complex’s group chat is going off right now because someone is playing music really loudly. My neighbour is threatening to kill the old woman in 35 with a kitchen knife,” you chuckled as Emily deflated, but read the messages aloud, which made the entire jet laugh. Spencer smiled along, an ease in the weight on his chest. 

----------------------------

You were exhausted. You hated this. You hated being so close to Spencer and not feeling able to talk to him. You hated how much you wanted him, needed him. You hated how little attention he paid to you. You didn't like going on first dates, much less sleeping with the asshole that was 'Josh' but he had a similar vibe to Spencer and you'd needed a release.

“Fuck,” you yawned, allowing your eyes to drop for a few seconds before Derek hit the back of your head to wake up. You groaned in response as he laughed. “Fuck you.”

“Come do it yourself,” he smirked and you rolled your eyes. “Anyways, how is it going?”

“I’ve narrowed down the geological profile from Spencer’s initial one-”

“I mean ‘Project Reid’!” He gossiped. “Have you even talked to him yet?”

“Derek,” you grumbled, resting your head against your hands. “He doesn’t want to talk to me, he doesn’t even fucking like me!” 

Derek internally rolled his eyes, irritation bubbling at the both of you. How could two of the most gifted profilers he knew not realise the goo-goo eyes they were sending each other while the other wasn’t looking?

“He likes you plenty,” he sighed. “Ask him out! Talk to him.”

“He does not like me!” You squealed. “Spencer Walter Reid does not like me, in a friendly way or a I-want-to-kiss-you-on-the-mouth way! Stop pushing something that will not happen, despite how much I want it to!”

----------------------------

As Spencer approached the conference room, his weary eyes tired as they focused on your figure. You looked beautiful. Spencer always thought you looked beautiful.

“He does not like me!” You squealed. “Spencer Walter Reid does not like me, in a friendly way or a I-want-to-kiss-you-on-the-mouth way! Stop pushing something that will not happen, despite how much I want it to!”

What.

You liked Spencer? You wanted to kiss Spencer. You just amditted to liking him.

“What?” Spencer’s voice from behind you startled you as Derek laughed. “Y-you want that?”

----------------------------

“What?” Spencer’s voice from behind you startled you as Derek laughed. “Y-you want that?”

You stared in Derek’s direction, willing for him to leave. Thankfully, he got the message immediately and left swiftly. Leaving you and Spencer alone together. Maybe he should’ve stayed. 

“Umm… yeah. I’ve like you since we were kids, but y’know… life got in the way-”

You were shocked. Spencer Reid, shy Spencer Walter Reid had just cut off your sentence with a kiss. 

What was going on? 

His lips were soft (he used lip balm often, clearly), his hands rested tentatively on you waist. But the kiss. If you could describe kissing Spencer Reid in one word, it would be hungry. He kissed you with as much passion as you would assume someone to give to their partner on their wedding day. He was blanking your mind with this insanely mind-blowing kiss.

“I really like you too,” he smiled. “I an I-wanna-kiss-you-on-the-mouth kinda way. Like I really want to do that again,” he smiled again and you couldn’t help but kiss him. His hands landed on your waist, more comfortable than before as your arms circled his neck. 

Maybe all his overthinking about you was too much. Maybe it was just that simple. 

You liked each other.

In an I-wanna-kiss-you-on-the-mouth kinda way. 

----------------------------

criminal minds masterlist :)

navigation for my blog :) (CRIMINAL MINDS, marvel, top gun, the bear, the hunger games, challengers, obx+)

[bluebugjay]

A lot of people aren't vibing with Charles and Crystal's romance and honestly i think it's because it's not necessarily supposed to be a full-fledged, endgame romance.

I think it's written to be a fling.

Charles is a flirt; one of the first things he thinks about when Edwin tells him ghosts can't feel is that he would miss kissing, he says himself it's nice to be seen by someone his own age, he calls Crystal fit, etc. Assumably between cases he has a very small social circle of literally just Edwin so it makes sense that this girl who he gets on with and finds attractive immediately becomes a bit of a crush for him.

Then Crystal picks up on his flirting almost immediately, again they get on, etc. She says if he wasn't dead and she wasn't dealing with the aftermath of her toxic relationship with David he would be a good addition to her body count, i.e. just a fling. She doesn't say they'd date or she could fall for him just that they'd probably hook up.

Their first kiss happens when they're both dealing with some heavy stuff, Charles is angry, continuing to push down his trauma with his father and his past, Crystal is annoyed about not being any closer to getting her memories back whilst trying to deal with the trauma her last relationship caused her. They find comfort in each other in that moment. Crystal says she wants something real and the care they have for each other is real, there's no manipulation, no secrets. It's honest and it's innocent.

The song that plays in that scene is called Young Blood (White Sea Remix) by The Naked and Famous and has lyrics such as 'we're only young and naive still' and 'can't help myself but count the flaws, claw my way out of these walls, one temporary escape' and 'we lie beneath the stars at night, our hands gripping each other tight, you keep my secrets hope to die' - It does align with the idea that they're what each other wants in the moment, a distraction, to be able to pretend everything is normal and ok (keep each others secrets)

Crystal in the next episode, the next morning after their kiss, literally calls Charles a 'cute distraction' and says they should be friends. This time both of their issues and trauma are the reason for them not continuing the relationship. Blatantly, Crystal isn't ready for another relationship so soon after David, she wakes up with a nightmare about him and Charles. They bring up Charles fighting the Night Nurse and Charles says that he thought they were on the same page about it and 'at least that's how it seemed last night' which again leans into the fact they were both looking for comfort. Charles and Crystal kissing had nothing explicitly to do with her supporting his actions fighting the Night Nurse and yet that's how he took it because that's what he was searching for comfort from and acceptance on. Which is most likely why he seems to take the rejection harder than Crystal, seemingly agreeing to be friends more out of respect for her choice than the want to call it quits himself.

Charles tells Edwin later on about the kiss (right after Edwin is complaining about having to cancel plans with Monty) and says though he didn't physically feel it, he did feel it 'up here' and points to his head. The mind is generally not the place you feel love, I feel that's a given. (reminds me of the starfish on the beach that Niko says are in love, Edwin points out starfish have no brain and Niko says love doesn't require logic, meaning: love is not stored in the mind.) Charles and Edwin's conversation veers off to being about there own relationship, with Charles saying he wouldn't want to be dead with anyone else - not even the girl you just kissed? No? Ok.

The way that episode goes (The case of the two dead dragons) Crystal and Charles end up arguing about the very reasons they decided to not continue their relationship. Crystal likens Hunter and Brad to David, and Charles defends them saying not everyone is her demon ex-boyfriend which seems like he's projecting and really defending himself. Then Crystal calls him out on his 'rage problem' and what happened with the Night Nurse. So though they comforted each other the night before, their real feelings for each others issues are surfacing and they're not so on the same page. Of course they get over this and apologise soon enough. Though in the end, it's Edwin Charles opens up to and actually talks to about how he's feeling rather than pushing it aside and looking for a distraction. And after that, Charles gives Crystal genuine comfort not just a distraction by listening to her talk about her nightmares/visions about David. (immediately followed by the scene of Edwin and Monty on the swings in which Edwin suggests they don't see each other anymore, then back tracks, they kiss followed by rejection which definitely has... parallels)

After that, Crystal and Charles are still an obvious source of comfort for one another, they talk to each other about their stresses, they stick close together a lot of the time but there's nothing inherently romantic to their actions aside from the fact we know they have kissed which gives their actions a depth that, for example Edwin and Niko's don't, despite them also being affectionate and spending time together alone.

Then in the last episode as Crystal is attempting to leave for London, her and Charles share another kiss. When she tries to say bye to Charles, he says it feels like a 'good-bye good-bye' rather than a 'see you back in London good-bye' and Crystal doesn't correct him, essentially confirming it was supposed to be a forever goodbye. She instead kisses him. It's a good-bye kiss. A (supposed to be) final kiss. A 'we had a good run' type of kiss. Crystal kisses him because she thinks she'll never see him again. It's similar to the first in which the kiss itself is the beginning and end, and it doesn't mean much past that. It's a kiss as a secret again, like their first kiss. A kiss to fill the space left by things they don't want to talk about. She doesn't want to admit she's planning on leaving for good so she kisses him instead, it's a comfort and it's a distraction. (and its consistent)

When Crystal decides to stay in the end, Charles says it'll be great, then specifies that 'solving cases together' will be great, not anything else that could of implied. Which could either be them just being awkward, or a flip in their dynamic that now Crystal is the one more involved in their relationship and Charles is the one setting boundaries.

Overall I think they have a really interesting dynamic. They are exactly what each other needs in moments and then the opposite in the next, they care about each other so much yet are possibly the people that unearth each others insecurities and traumas the most. They're both looking for a new, different kind of relationship and find it within the other but inherently once the novelty fades they fall more into being friends than anything more. I think like most of the relationships in this show, they're supposed to be complicated, they're supposed to be more of a journey than a destination. They learn and grow from their interactions together and I think that's something really beautiful.

[hedgehog-moss]

I'm happy to announce that this month I was finally able to buy Pirlouit a proper packsaddle! Doesn't he look very professional? And handsome. He receives a lot of compliments every time a visitor sees him all dressed up.

If he looks a bit wary in this photo it's because it was the first time I added the baskets, and as he'd never seen such large baskets before he wasn't sure they weren't about to eat him. His nervousness only took the form of twitchy ears though, there was no drama. (And he can be very melodramatic, so really he's been very stoical and self-possessed in the process of getting used to the packsaddle.)

He can also sulk for days if I make him do something he doesn't like (e.g. hoof care, which he seems to interpret as pointless torture), so I find it gratifying that every time we've used the packsaddle so far, he didn't try to avoid me the next day but came to greet me—he makes it very obvious when he is offended by an activity, and I'm glad that he seems to enjoy being asked to help carry things :).

When I bought the packsaddle I was a bit concerned about the girth being too small, because Pirou refused to let me measure his circumference beforehand (and I was pretty sure having to resort to some sort of girth extender would embarrass him) (but he does have a very round belly...)

But no; I was able to fasten all the straps—though I spared him the crupper strap at first.

I had to have two tall trees felled in the pasture (because of a project I will talk about in another post), and I also cut a couple of storm-damaged trees in my woods, so I spent a lot of time this year cutting & splitting logs. I now have several stacks quite far from my house, in places that can't be reached with a wheelbarrow, and my donkey's help is very appreciated to carry everything to the woodshed. Plus, the people who visit me are usually more into doing stuff with the llamas, so this allows me to give attention to Pirlouit too, while doing something useful.

Aren't you proud to be now in my Top 3 Most Useful Animals, Pirou?

... wait he's still grumbling about that one comment.

[lokideservesahug]

Always With Me

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Pairing: Charles Leclerc x reader (I think gn)

Warnings: Nothing, just a(n inchident?!? Sorry lol) short thing :).

Notes: CHARLES WIN IN MONACO!!! WOOOOO❤❤❤ I was inspired by something @a-beaverhausen said when we were talking about Charles and his jewellery in the cool down room (or more particularly, the blue set I've never noticed before)!!

Summary: Your boyfriend is famous for his jewellery. But you can't help but pay special attention to his newst additions.

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Charles wore a lot of jewellery, you know that. Everyone knows that. Whether it was the rings he's worn for years or the friendship braclets given to him by a multitude if fans over the race weekend, he always wears some kind of jewellery. So despite you loving and caring for your boyfriend deeply, you didn't pay much mind to any new additions to his person with how often his wrists sported new accessories.

However, when you watch the projection of the three podium sitters in the cooldown room, your attention is fixed soley on your boyfriend. Or more particularly what he's doing. You find it both endearing and extremely sweet that one of the first things he does after every race is re-adorn himself with his staple jewellery (whether he DNF's or wins for the first time ever in his home track). Yet, more particularly, you take notice of the more expensive looking set of bracelet and ring he's currently putting on (rather attractively you must say).

Now, Monaco is a busy weekend because:

a) It's Monaco for crying out loud and

b) It's Charles' home race of course.

So you noticed that he had new, clearly expensive looking jewellery this weekend but hadn't had the time to fully take it in. Yet as you look at it you swear that it's the familiar shade of your birthstone. You, however don't have much time to ponder on it before the crowd goes wild with applause and Carlos makes his way on to the podium and you wait excitedly for your boyfriend to make his Monaco podium debut.

☆-☆-☆-☆-☆

Light cuts softly through your soft slumber and you feel your boyfriend nuzzle futher into your shoulder and groan slightly. As most would expect, last night's celebrations were off the charts. But, that also leaves your boyfriend in a very hungover, very clingy state. You, fortunately (having the saner mind last night out of the two of you) decided not go get wasted and so that left you able to admire your drowsy boyfriend who was currently waking from the last holds of slumber. He throws his left arm over your waist and that's when you notice his jewellery again.

Exactly as you expected. The lovely shade of your birthstone greets you or rather the sight or many of your birthstones on his ring and bracelet meet your curious gaze. You hear a soft grumble and then "Bonjour ma chérie." You chuckle at his gruff voice. "Morning Charlie." You kiss the crown of his head. "How is my favourite Monaco race winner today?" You feel his toothy grin against your chest and hear his chuckles. He awners your question and you distantly clock his far off words but don't respond.

"Darling?" You hum at him and meet his soft gaze. "What has you so distracted?" You shake your head slightly and your eyes catch in to his bracelet once again. "Nothing." He follows your gaze and blushed once he realises the object of your attention. Charles buries his head in your chest once more and mumbles something inaudibly. "Pardon?" You softly beckon the man to repeat himself. He lifts his head but refuses to meet your eyes "I said. I was hoping you wouldn't realise that." You tilt your head at his words. "What? Why?" He shakes his head and his cheeks warm again. You smile fortly at him. "Come on you can tell me. I just want to know about your new jewellery. I didn't take that as your style." Charles meets your eyes and elaborates. "It's just a friend of mine wanted to make some jewellery for me when you were away a few weeks ago." You hum at his words and gesture his hand for him to continue. "And I just really missed you and didn't like feeling like that. So I thought if I had jewellery of your birthstone it would be like I always had a piece of you with me."

It was now your turn to blush at his clearly love filled words. "Oh..." Despite making the connection that his jewellery was made of your birthstone, you hadn't hadn't bold enough to make the assumption that he had done it deliberately for you rather than it being a consequence. "Well." You softly kiss his nose. "I think it's sweet." You smile at him. "Although, I can't say I don't feel a bit left out." His face swiftly splits out into that full face grin you fell in love with. " Well mon ange, I can easily fix that."

And despite your teasing words holding no weight, his certainly did. And he proved this when two days later, he gifted you a small box with a rather large, attractive opal of his birthstone sat on a gorgeous chain and a promise of a ring coming soon. Only he didn't specify exactly what kind of ring he meant and he knew that the one he was going to gift to you also came with very important question...

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Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it!

As always, likes, reblogs and especially feedback is always welcome!

Taglist:@nikfigueiredo @mysoulispainted @leclercings @d3kstar @hiireadstuff @a-beaverhausen @nichmeddar @lozzamez3 @stinkyjax @marymustdie @littlesatanicassholebitch @mehrmonga @insanedeathwish @ems-alexandra @a-disturbing-self-reflection @cherry-piee

[risoria]

so. have you seen the pictures from Rafah of the blackened, charred infants? the toddler with no head?

i would like to ask a favour of everyone seeing this post, from one human to another. don't think about the things you can't do - because as it seems, nothing is enough, and nobody can do enough - there is no use to be paralyzed by these thoughts. instead focus on the things you are already doing and the things you can do. i will start by compile a small list of personal suggestions, and please add to it from your own resources! this list is not numbered, i will just add things that i can think of off the top of my head and if it is of any help to at least one person, thats good. take care of yourself - that includes taking care of others, and this world we live in.

this is obvious but keep listening to Palestinian voices. i am mostly active on twitter so i will give some examples from there: Hind_Gaza, HossamShabat, BayanPalestine (press). MuhammadSmiry, does community work with Care for Gaza. m7mdkurd. Everyone is saying mostly the same thing - keep talking, keep protesting, keep boycotting. so do it.

keep talking. humans are social animals and it's as simple as this: the ongoing genocide is dire, urgent and catastrophic - i dont think i need to tell you that. but when people, a lot of people, share posts with each other and reiterate this fact the urgency will be felt stronger by everyone, and reach people who would otherwise maybe not see the reports of the genocide on their screens. if people instead choose to stop sharing and stop talking because it's "been so long" or it's "too difficult", the suffering will become normalized and the only thing people will see on their feeds are mundane things - food, pets, fandoms, and it will send the message that oh, it's not that important after all.... sometimes, you SHOULD feel disturbed and uncomfortable. these feelings are not evil - they will be channelled into actions to better a situation and better the world. silence is violence.

search for protests near your town, sometimes they're hard to find but once you find your local organizations for the Palestinian movement, follow them and you will usually find them! this all depends on where you live of course - but most often there will be fundraisers and events and mailing campaigns etc, and the more people joining the better. and, most importantly i would say, share these events and pictures (no faces of strangers, ofc! from protests on your facebook, twitter etc - because that way people close to you will see them and that it's completely rational and normal to attend protests, and if they've been on the fence maybe they will reach out and join you.

donate if you are able and share links to the different organizations - some examples are Care for Gaza, Sulala animal rescue, the Gazan Municipality Life for Gaza project (https://gaza-city.ensany.com/campaign/6737), the PCRF.

individual gofundmes - here is the google doc with a lot of campaigns, but im sure there are lots of them that arent yet added: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1-DDMFyn-ttboPXrz1bB3MFk7BlzCwfugh4259Wh7U1s/htmlview

donate e-sims, which will be sent by the Esims for Gaza team to people in Gaza, to help communicate with their families etc during blackouts. it's very quick and easy and on nomad you can get a referral code which gives someone else 25% off their first purchase, and there's also often different bonus codes. on the website there's tutorials for how to buy the different esims. https://gazaesims.com/

there's some different charity shops where you can buy Palestinian products and the proceeds help Palestinian artisans and people. here are some examples, please add more if you know any: https://handmadepalestine.com/ (based in Ramallah, Palestine), https://forpalestine.dk/ (based in Denmark), https://www.shoppalestine.org/ (based in the US)

boycott!! the BDS of course have their targeted brands (https://bdsmovement.net/) but there's also for example the witness website with lists of brands and the reasons for boycotting them (https://boycott.thewitness.news/) and some different apps that do the same thing, like the "no thanks" app. yes, the list of brands is very, very long. maybe all of it isn't feasible BUT i think a good start would be to go through them and decide which ones are unnecessary either way that you're better off without (mcdonalds, starbucks etc), and then which ones are part of your usual shopping routine, make a mental note of them and pick different options - see it as an opportunity to try new things, to support local brands and smaller businesses!

go do yourself a favour and give Palestinian-Canadian artist Nemahsis' new single "stick of gum" a listen, it's super good! <3 https://youtu.be/VsqYlmf3SAg?si=EK_TZjo0Ijny8hMT

please, add more tips and resources below or just share your own pictures or art or thoughts!