#i want to just make myself some toast or sandwich without having to do a million of them

[storytowrite]

|You will always be mine ~ Lee Minho series|

PART 11

Paring: Minho x Y/N

Genre: smut, angst, university au

Word count: 1089

Warnings: sex, 18+, Minho is a psycho, dom!Minho, sub!reader, abuse, slight BDSM, kidnapping, violence, age gap, Minho is an university professor, Y/N can be hurt physically (and mentally too I guess).

Synopsis: Who knew that accidental fuck in the club bathroom with a handsome man will bring you to a lot of unexpected events.

Author's note: I kept this series for a really long time not sure if I want to post it or not, but I decided to do it anyway, so I hope you'll like it.

——————————

Another body was found this morning, belonging to a young female student. The girl had been stripped of her limbs while she was still alive..., An announcement on television rang out. You were blown away. Another murder. On the TV screen appeared, this time, a photo of the victim. The shock you felt was indescribable. 

The photo belonged to Lisa. You rubbed your eyes in amazement. You didn't expect that the next person to lose her life would be your old friend. But did you really not know? You guessed that, as in the case of Rheena, the perpetrator could have been Minho. But without evidence, you couldn't even do anything or confront him. 

Tears came to your eyes. You didn't miss your friendship with Lisa, but the thought that the girl was dead filled you with sadness. You looked toward your bedroom, where Minho was still sleeping. Why were you actually in his apartment? Why didn't you leave as he slept -  leave him alone? Minho arranged for you to be excused from classes for the rest of the week, but actually why? Why did you even listen to him? 

You couldn't answer your questions. You weren't afraid of Minho, just yet, but you didn't feel safe in his company either. He seemed different from when you first met him. How did you let a one-night adventure turn into something that maybe someone could and would call a relationship... but without love (at least on your part). You didn't know what feelings you had for the man. The whole situation was making you dizzy.  

You suddenly heard footsteps. You quickly turned off the TV and went back to eating breakfast. You didn't want Minho to find out that you were watching the news again. But actually why? Were you afraid of confrontation with a man? Did you have reasons for that? 

“Good morning, kitten.” The man walked up to you and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead. “”Slept well?“” 

“Yes, yes.” You smiled slightly at him. “And you?” 

“I slept like I killed myself.” He laughed and stole one toast from your plate. 

“Hey, that's mine!” You muttered, trying to ignore his earlier words. 

“Not now.” He smiled at you, biting into the sandwich. “Mmmm yummy.” He winked. “What would you like to do today?” 

“I was thinking of going home.” You answered immediately. “I have some study backlogs... I need to catch up on them.” 

“Hm... after all, you can catch up on them here.” The man replied after a moment's thought. “You know, you can actually move in here, your stuff is already here anyway.” 

“I don't know if that's a good idea Minho... You're still my lecturer. If anyone catches us...” You started but he interrupted you. 

“No one will catch us, kitten. My house is your house. Besides, you can catch up on my subject in a very pleasant way.” He started and leaned over you. “You know, last time we discussed nudes...” His hands rested on the armrests of the chair you were sitting on causing you to have no way to escape. 

“Nudes?” You looked at him with doe eyes. 

“Mhm... nudes.” He whispered, placing a gentle kiss on your neck. “In every... era... they were... painted... differently.” Each word was interrupted by a gentle caress of your neck. You tilted your head back gently, allowing the man more access to your skin. You closed your eyes. 

Minho began kissing you more boldly. He glided his velvety lips along your neck. One of his hands found its way to your leg and gilded gently upward, causing goosebumps on your bare skin. You let out a quiet moan as he bit down gently and sucked a spot on your neck. Your breathing quickened. Minho was already about to slip his hand between your thighs when the phone rang. He sighed heavily and pulled away from you. 

“We'll get back to it, kitten.” He said and went to answer it. You sighed heavily. You got up from the chair after a while and went to listen to what the man was talking about. 

“No, I did everything so as not to leave traces... What do I care if they found her? I don't know Han, okay? You know very well that all that matters to me is Y/N, and that idiot over there had snitches on us... I couldn't let those pictures leak out.” 

You were flabbergasted to hear Minho's words. Did he just talk about Lisa's murder with some Han? Did he actually kill her? You didn't know what to think about all this. All you wanted was to get away from him as soon as possible. 

“I have to go, I'll call you later.” You heard, but before you had time to take a step and return to the living room, the man was already standing in front of you. “It's not nice to eavesdrop kitten, you know?” 

“I'm not eavesdropping just...” You began to stammer. 

“Just what?” He leaned over you. “You haven't been a good kitten lately. I'll have to do something about that fact.”

“I'm sorry Minho, I didn't mean to...” The anxiety started to grow inside you. 

“Of course you didn't mean to.” He snorted, hardly convinced. “Now tell me, what did you manage to hear?” 

“Nothing, I swear!” You replied, taking a step back. 

“Don't lie.” Said Minho a little more sharply, taking a step forward. You stepped back even more, encountering a wall with your back. You watched him, fear beginning to paint on your face. 

“I'm not lying!” You shouted in helplessness. “All I know is that you talked to some Han and nothing else! And you said something about some snitches...” 

“So you heard something after all! And you tried to deny it!” He said loudly, clearly irritated. “I don't like lying, Y/N. And I won't tolerate it.” 

“I'm sorry... I didn't mean to.” Tears appeared in your eyes. Minho looked at you and moved away sighing slightly. 

“I'm a little disappointed in you... But you know very well that I won't hurt you, don't cry.”  He whispered and wiped the tear drops from your cheek with his thumb. “I love you...” 

You looked at him in shock, not expecting such a confession. Time seemed to have suddenly slowed down. Was the man standing in front of you suddenly confessing his love to you, and moments before he was deadly angry with you? How sick a movie did you find yourself in?

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<- Part 10 | Part 12 ->

-> Series Masterlist

Taglist: @yaorzu-blog, @iovecb97, @hpnsfwaddict, @syedazarintasnim, @palindrome969, @biujulia

[steddieas-shegoes]

“You have to keep stirring until it’s thin, like soup.”

Steve had said this four times.

Eddie wanted a divorce.

They weren’t legally married, but he’d like to find a way to end it before it began.

“I’ve been stirring it for six minutes. It’s not getting thinner.”

“That’s impossible. Let me try.”

Steve was the chef. Eddie knew it, Steve knew it, everyone knew it. He was good at cooking. Not just following recipes, but actually throwing together ingredients from scratch and making something not only edible, but delicious.

But Steve was going away for a week with Robin. Something about a long overdue road trip that they were supposed to take before she went to college.

Eddie had every intention of just living off of takeout and the sympathy of Joyce and Claudia while he was gone, but Steve insisted that he had to know how to at least make a few things.

Steve seemed to think he could make a glaze for the baked chicken currently in the oven. The same baked chicken he’d almost burned because he thought he could put it in on broil instead of baked. He was really THAT hopeless.

But Steve was determined and when Steve was like this, he had no choice but to go along with it.

Steve was stirring, frown becoming more prominent the longer he tried.

“Something isn’t right. Did you put the lemon juice in?”

“You watched me put it in.”

“And the jelly was completely cooked down before you turned down the heat?”

“Yes.”

“You’re sure?”

“Steve.” Eddie placed his hands on Steve’s shoulders from behind him, shaking him slightly. “I can just eat pizza. Or sandwiches. Cereal. Joyce is having me over for spaghetti one night, I’m sure there will be leftovers. I won’t starve.”

“But you need to know how to take care of yourself!”

Warning sirens were going off in Eddie’s head. He’d been alone for a couple of days before and everything was fine. He’d made some macaroni, ate his weight in toast, it was great. He survived.

He even ate an apple!

So he could do it if he had to.

“What’s going on in that head, big boy?”

“Nothing. It’s just that Wayne didn’t have time to show you this stuff and you need to know.”

“I can make it a week, Stevie.”

“What if you have to make it longer?”

“Are you planning on running away? Going into hiding?”

He could tell Steve was rolling his eyes without even seeing his face.

“No. But what if I’m not always around?”

Eddie’s gut clenched. Steve must be sick. Or maybe he has a feeling that somehow the Upside Down is open and ready to ruin their lives again.

“Why wouldn’t you be?”

“I mean anything can happen. What if we get in an accident and I don’t make it?”

“Woah.” Eddie turned Steve around and held onto his hips, fingers probably leaving bruises on his skin. “Where is this coming from?”

Steve shrugged and looked down at the floor.

“Robin has anxiety about it doesn’t she?”

Steve nodded.

Ah.

Robin didn’t intentionally shove her anxieties onto Steve, and she didn’t realize he felt them so strongly when she did. She was a worrier, always thinking about the worst case scenario and then somehow making it worse in her mind.

Eddie didn’t really let it bother him until it affected Steve.

“Sweetheart, nothings gonna happen. You’ve changed the oil and checked the tires. You’ve packed every possible thing you could need in any emergency. You have a cup of change for pay phones if you need to use them. You’ve got every stop picked out and we’ll know where you are the whole time.”

“But none of that helps if I’m in an accident.”

“No. You’re right. It doesn’t. But what are the odds of that happening really?”

Steve was silent.

Eddie cupped his face between his palms, leaning forward to kiss him gently.

“It’s okay to be nervous, Stevie. But you don’t have to worry about that. I can take care of myself without having to know how to make a glaze for a baked chicken. Do you really think I’m gonna waste an hour of my evening making this decadent dinner for myself? Or do you think I’ll make a sandwich and eat a bag of chips while I read a book?”

“I know.”

“I know you know. So let’s just trash the glaze, dip the chicken in some ketchup, and fuck around until we fall asleep. I’m gonna miss you for a whole week.”

Eddie’s hands slid around him to cup Steve’s ass and give it a squeeze. Steve smirked up at him as he let himself fall into Eddie.

“We could just go right to dessert?”

“Are you the dessert or am I?”

“I’m the cake and you’re the ice cream.”

“We better hurry then before the ice cream melts.”

“You’re ridiculous,” Steve laughed as Eddie pulled him from the kitchen to the stairs.

“I’m hungry, let’s go!”

[optimisticstudentangel]

🍽 Feeding side characters from your hand 🍽

🍷Diavolo🍷

-          “MC? Greetings, are you here to visit the young master?” – butler asked you with curiosity.

-          Yes, I am. Why? – Barbatos smiled and replied: “Young prince have been ignoring his responsibilities, so I prohibited him to go outside of his office room until he is finished…”. You let a little disappointed sigh.

-          … Well, it may be a great time to take a break, - Barbatos said to cheer you up. “It will be no use to push him to do his job if he is tired. So that’s why you will bring him some tea and the pastries I prepared. I would have done it myself, but I consider that young master prefers your company more”

-          All right! – you agreed.

You walked to the office room and greeted Diavolo. He instantly smiled at you showing you his fangs.

-          Well, hello there, my darling! What brings you here?

-          Just wanted to see you. And feed too – Diavolo giggled at your suggestion.

-          Why so? Oh but I am not refusing your offer, quite the opposite. You intrigued me, - he pulled a chair over to you so you could sit down. You poured him strawberry flavored tea, and started to cut the cake into slices. You gave him a plate with a pastry and he grabbed a spoon to eat it.

-          Stop, what are you doing? – Diavolo froze and awkwardly smiled: “Is something wrong?”

-          I will be feeding you, so just sit back and open your mouth, ok?

-          Heheh, well why not - he opened his mouth and looked at you intently. You took a small piece of cake with a spoon and brought it to his lips. He did not immediately eat the piece, smiling at you with a cheeky smile before doing that.

-          Mhm, delicious. But doesn’t compare with your sweetness, - he flustered you, and for what. You looked at his grinning expression and noticed the crème on his lips. Without any regret you kissed him and gave a sly smile.

-          What…

-          There was a crème – you kissed that spot again.

-          Oh, darling… Could you check again if it’s clean or not? – he said with blushing face.

☕︎Barbatos☕︎

-          Will this be enough amount of sugar or should I add more? – you asked Barbatos.

-          Enough. You may leave the rest for me. I will roll out the dough, so you can have a rest. Thanks for your help, you really did a good job, my love, - he praised you. You wanted to help him, to stay with him and just talk. Sometimes you need more, more of him and his company. So you look for something to do.  

-          You haven’t started making the cream, have you? I can help!

-          Love, take a break.

-          No I insist. I am getting hungry… - you find the excuse to do as you please.

-          All right then, - he finally accepted your tender.

You took the ingredients for the cream and started mixing everything together in the thicket. Gently stirring everything with a whisk, you looked at the statuesque male figure. He is so handsome you thought.

When the cream was ready, you approached Barbatos and offered to try it.

-          MC, I’ve got batter hands. I am afraid I can’t taste it now.

-          No need to worry about that, - you said. You brought a spoon of cream close to his mouth, so he could lick it. His head bent closer to your level, he slowly ran his tongue over the cream whisk.

-          So?

-          Good. Very good. You’ve improved, my love.

-          Is that so? Well, I think we should do this more then, especially the test tasting part, hehe.  

 🌮Simeon🌮

After a long night of teaching Simeon how to use his phone, it was decided for you to stay the night in his room. You woke up earlier than him, which is a rare sight. You thought that you would use this moment to cook something for him as a love gesture. He didn’t move an inch when you got up. So he’ll probably lay in his bed for another hour.

You started making his famous BLT sandwiches. You cut the vegetables, fried the meat and prepared slices of toasts. After you’ve done the cooking, you rushed to Simeon’s room.

-          Aww, such a sleepyhead, - you whispered.

-          I wouldn’t agree on that statement, - Simeon answered with closed eyes. “Anyway where have you been, it was so cold and lonely laying without you”

-          It doesn’t matter, I am here now, so everything is good. As an apology would you take this, - you held the sandwich up to the Simeon’s face. Because of the smell, the angel opened his eyes. You decided to keep holding the sandwich for him, so he could eat without using his hands. He was so cute like that.

-          It’s very tasty, I must say. But you still owe me…

-          What should I do to make you forgive me?

-          A kiss might me reconsider, - angel said. You gently kissed him first on the cheek, then on the lips, then on the neck.

-          I gave you three. Am I forgiven now? – he kissed you again: “Yes, you are now”

 🍨Solomon🍨

Solomon asked you to keep him a company while he would buy different magic things and you agreed. Both of you entered various kinds of shops and took many stuff. “Does Solomon really needs all of this” – you started questioning yourself. “And how is he going to lift it all by himself? All these things are sure heavy” – you thought.

-          Um… Solomon do you need a hand? – you asked.

-          Oh no, it’s not a problem for me. I already made you spend your free time with me, so just relax and do not move a finger, - he declined your offer. “Besides, if I get exhausted I can summon a demon and make him carry all the stuff I got. Asmo will do” – he said with a smile.

You laughed at his words. “Asmo will get mad” – you added. “But seriously isn’t there a thing I can help you with?” – you still continued to ask the sorcerer.

Solomon pondered, his gaze fixed somewhere in the distance. He seems to have figured out what to do with you. "Be kind, my dear, take us both ice cream," the sorcerer asked.

You smiled brightly and bought the sweet food.

You looked at Solomon with delight, expecting something. "Hmm?" - Solomon looked at you in surprise, not understanding what you wanted from him.  

-          Open your mouth, silly. How do you expect to eat the ice cream, with full hands?

-          Oh yeah, you are right, - Solomon licked the ice cream. “Delicious” – he said with happy expression.

While Solomon was enjoying the taste of the delicacy, you could not restrain yourself and stroked his head, from which the sorcerer made a cute sound.  

He realized that it was pretty hearable, and asked you not to tell about it to anybody.

-          Well, if only I can hear it again, - you said jokingly.

[gotjacobian]

I watched BDG's breakfast sandwich video the other day. I think the sandwich he makes is perfectly serviceable, but I know in my heart that the one I make is 1) faster, 2) tastier, and 3) vegetarian friendly and therefore better. This is one of the few areas in which I permit myself arrogance. Here is how I make it - it takes ten minutes and you *can* add meat and hash browns or whatever to it if you really want. I just think it's a superior sandwich even without those things.

Ingredients: - Bread (Usually a halved Bolo roll because they have those here, or two slices of trader joe's soft sourdough. An english muffin or bagel or whatever would also work. Once I used portuguese sweet bread, which was a pain to toast but was very tasty.) - Butter - 1-2 eggs - Shredded cheese (I basically only get the mexican three-cheese blend) + Other omelette ingredients if you want - Mayonnaise - Minced jarred garlic, roasted garlic, or garlic powder - Half a tomato (I am a tomato liker and usually just chop and eat the other half) - Salt and pepper (and optionally, MSG) 1. Toast the bread. I use a toaster or convection oven, if you don't have one, melt enough butter to thinly coat the bottom of a pan on medium heat, and put the bread on while that's bubbling.

2. While the bread is toasting, beat the egg(s) in a bowl with a large pinch of salt and pepper (plus a smaller pinch of MSG if you have/want it). Heat half a tablespoon of butter in whatever pan you have over medium heat. Once it's melted, pour on the egg mixture.

2. While that's cooking, mix the sauce - about a tablespooon of equal parts mayonnaise and jarred garlic, or two cloves roast garlic, or however much garlic powder makes you happy.

3. Wait a minute or two for the bottom of the egg mixture to solidify. The top will still look liquid. Sprinkle a small handful of shredded cheese on the top. you can add other omelette filling-type ingredients too (herbs, spinach, sundried tomato, bell pepper, whatever). I do chopped parsley pretty regularly with good results.

4. When the cheese has melted, fold the omelette over the cheese. Waiting a minute, flip it, take it off the heat, and use your utensil to cut it in half.

5. Spread your sauce on both halves of your bread. Add half your omelette to each slice of bread. Slice the tomato, sprinkle salt on it, put it on top, eat it as either open or closed-face.

(Bonus: I put Lao Gan Ma on it too sometimes and my girlfriend gives me no end of shit for it. But it's really good, so if that's something you have give it a shot too. Just spread some on top of the egg when doing final assembly, it's great)

(Double bonus: There's a place here that makes toum [blended garlic and olive oil sauce] which I steal from university events they cater. Use that instead of the garlic mayonnaise thing if you can get it. You can futz with the sauce in all kinds of ways too - I have not personally tried mixing sriracha or chopped herbs or something with the mayonnaise instead of garlic, but whatever "___ aioli" your favorite hip restaurant is serving you, try mixing that thing with it and it'll probably be good)

In an ideal world, this only dirties one pan, one fork, one knife, and one bowl, which is acceptable to me. If you have pre-cooked or cured meat you want to add, you can add them straight to the omelette. Otherwise you can cook it separately and add it at the end, though I like it just fine without. I DID try putting microgreens on it once and that was a wreck, they wouldn't stay in the sandwich and tasted bad cooked, so fair warning there. Really do try the bolo roll if you can get them, I like them way better than english muffins.

[keefwho]

January 02 - 2024 Tuesday

10:59pm

5.5/10

This morning I took the garbage out, vacuumed the floor, tidied up some boxes, and scrubbed Sporticus's water bowl. I showered without my phone today because I've been intentional about not watching/listening to something unless I have an actual desire to because most often I just try to fill the silence. For breakfast I made corned beef hash with onions and bell peppers with 2 pieces of toast. I chopped all the peppers I bought into strips and froze them for sandwich use. I watched Bojack while eating breakfast.

I got to stream on time and warmed up trying to draw my otter in the spongebob maid outfit. I also sketched and priced another guy's commission. I had trouble sketching and was also worried I'd have nothing good to draw because my heart has not been in it lately to the point where I think it might be best to not try and force myself to draw something unless it's for work obviously. I finished both of Shiro's commissions today which put me just over my daily quota since they were both small. I remember getting irritated at not being able to draw her hands well and figure in general. I just wasn't good at it today and I feel bad that some people's commissions suffer because of it.

After stream I heard my new speakers come in so I tried to set them up but realized I had no way to plug them into my PC and headphones at the same time. Unfortunately I have to send them back which reminds me I also need to send back this other thing I've been putting off. I have no excuse since I just give them to my dad to take to UPS whenever he ends up going to town. I also wrapped Daisy's last present that just came in. Afterwards XQC started streaming so I tuned in while I tried to make Hoover stew. I got bored of him and switch to Bojack again while I cooked and ate. It turned out okay, healthy and filling at the very least. I'll probably try making it again. Then I opened a Dr.Thunder and got to work.

I finished a request for Tag which I think turned out well. Then I worked on a late Venus new year's pic for 1 hour. I was struggling with the colors and decided to sort them out later. Right after that I did day 1 of the yoga challenge which wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, she started off with some physically testing poses I struggled to hold. It felt good to stretch though. I did it in the barbie-like flower world in VRchat. This weird guy requested off me but I denied. After that I buckled down and started my new secret project for 1 hour which went well. I enjoyed doing it and it was relaxing since I had TOTK on my TV just resting with it's ambient music and weather.

When I was done with that I wanted to relax so I put on an episode of Bojack. Towards the end, Daisy became free so we called and chilled. I tried playing a little KSP but didn't do much before quitting. She shared her screen looking at Twitter and then we checked Zillow for outrageously expensive houses. We saw a plantation and also a well designed house for once. We also peaked at Disney houses, dog races, and cartoons out of context. She got to bed pretty quick and I played Neopets for her. I thought we were at the end but there's still at least another chapter to go so I was happy about that.

Today was okay, I was very productive and stuck to my schedule well which I always feel good about. In the evening I didn't know what I wanted and felt very boring while hanging out. I was afraid I was dull to be around and was feeling very self conscious about my hair. I think in general it's because I didn't have much to contribute today, like I had no substance.

[duckyfruitbat]

Pokemon Violet Glitches

Something that I find fun in is discovering glitches in video games that can break things visually or fundamentally. I managed to do that with Champions of Norath by accident while playing with my dad and brother. I've also done it intentionally while launching myself into the void in Simpsons Hit and Run. So in the spirit of my Pokemon Red and Blue glitch compilation, I'm going to list some glitches my friends and I have experienced while playing Pokemon Violet.

Melting cliffs: A common graphical bug is when textures pop in. It is something that happens as a result of coding done to avoid melting the processor and a small lag as you have the camera pan around or even load into a new area. Never have I ever seen graphics melt into place. Often times I'm riding my robot lizard in the country side and I see the cliffs melt as the textures settle into place. The hills are alive indeed, but I don't think I'm hearing music.

T-posing?: One time when I was having a picnic with some friends, we were letting our Pokemon play, we just had a hearty meal, and I look over to see one of the wild bird Pokemon float in the air in its default pose. I didn't know what to think, other than how stable and functional this game was.

Vibrating Dachsbuns: During my journey I caught a Fidough because it's a bread dog and I needed it in my life, and it was a fairy type, my main typing. I named her Honey-bun and she is my ace. Something that I noticed however is that during a battle she sometimes starts lightly jumping in and out of the floor, but not too much, only ankles deep. I was wondering if she specifically was bugged, no turns out it was all dachsbuns that the player would use. The same thing happened with a shiny one I was gifted, her name is Toast.

Crystal Prison: In area zero at the very bottom of the crater there is a large crystal, big enough to encase the professors lab, but also Pokemon spawn on top of it...and inside of it. Every time I visit the place I see Pokemon that spawn inside the crystal and walking around as if nothing is wrong. It does become a problem when my eyes have trouble processing depth and I run face first into a non glitched Pokemon.

Missing Models: Several times me and my friends have encountered moments when items, characters and Pokemon just vanish. One time Honey-bun was fighting air labeled Iron Treads, a friend tried to make a sandwich without a plate, bun, fixings, or a table, somehow they got a sandwich. There were a couple times when my lizard bike vanishes and I'm left straddling the air going at mach Jesus. I caught a Pokemon without a ball once, and I battled without a Pokemon another time. My brother had a picnic horror story where at the end of the taste test animation his flesh disappeared with just his eyes and teeth remaining.

No Animations: When you enter a Terra Raid it opens with the player character opening there eyes in a blinding light as though they're trying to adjust to the light, sometimes that doesn't work out and the cut scene opens with the player staring directly into the light without blinking which my optometrist tells me is a terrible idea. Other times the poke-ball doesn't fall to the ground when catching a land based Pokemon like mareep.

Where's the Dang Music?: So the friend I talk about is a music major with a hyper fixation. They already heard good things about the Elite Four theme but wanted to be surprised during the battle. They encountered the glitch where only the first few seconds of the theme was playing on a loop and was genuinely disappointed with how lame the song was. Then they found out about the glitch.

HP go WEEEEEEEEE!: This one also deals the the Terra Raids. On numerous occasions when attempting a raid I can have the opponent HP to near zero and then somehow it goes back up to halfway, and this was after the shields went down. It does happen when the shields lag behind too, completely infuriating either way. Sometimes it is funny in the sense of "Bitch you thought!"

Clipping: This one is more of a coding error, the player characters don't have a hit box. This is something you only really notice when doing the multiplayer. My friends and I love to just stand in each other creating an abomination of us just clipping in and out of each other.

The NPC's Don't Give a Fuck: Again this is more of a coding error, but when evolving a Pokemon they do it in the world right next to you. I did this in a town and as my Applin was being baked into a pie there was a man walking towards the camera with his Roly Coly straight through my fruit dragon. He did not care, didn't even flinch.

Wall Spawns: This one is pretty common, there are times when an outbreak spawn by a cliff and some Pokemon will spawn in a cliff. There is an infamous clip of someone shiny hunting only to realize that the shiny they were hunting spawned in the cliff and was thus unobtainable.

The Raid Where Nothing Happened: During a Terra raid my brother had, for the first two minutes nothing happened except all the characters just standing there with the music blaring in the background. He tweeted out this clip with the caption "you like Jazz?"

Those were only the glitches me and my friends have encountered, they weren't the craziest game breaking glitches but they entertained us. This game really is a mess and should've spent some more time in the oven. There were plenty of things to enjoy from it, the picnics are fun, I enjoyed the gym leaders, and being able to interact in multiplayer in real time is great. Like with Red and Blue, I can see a community developing around the glitches alone, so more fun to be had.

[egregiousderp]

Eheheheh those were only part of my tags, but they’re mine, so I’ll answer. ^^;;

So. My concept, without getting into the cheese/fruit combinations in general is that Grape/Cheese on a wheat toast or something is just basically a charcuterie board in sandwich form. So In Theory, it should work because those aren’t necessarily unusual flavors to put together, it just mostly depends on your cheese.

Like. Grape and Cheese is the God Damn Ratatouille pairing of flavors greater than the sum of their parts. (And the cheese Remy’s munching on is an orange cheese with a red grape.) So what you’re fighting against is the aggressive sweetness of the grape jelly. You’d just need something sharper and tangier to cut through. Maybe an extra sharp cheddar.

It probably won’t work specifically with white/potato bread and American cheese because both those flavors have sweetness to them to start with. So if you’re the kind of person who makes your grilled cheese that way it’s THAT CAN’T WORK, and most likely, you’re right. That would be an overall “sweeter” sandwich to start with, and the grape would just take it over the top. That’s the kind of thing you usually balance with a tangy source like a tomato soup.

It also probably doesn’t work to add grape jelly if you’re the kind of person who adds alliums and aromatics to your grilled cheese—which I normally do. Caramelized onion in a cheese sandwich is also slightly sweet, and usually I’m combining it with a sharp cheddar and a sourdough bread or rye. (Both of which are on the tart end of bread, which offsets the sweet of all those nice brown onions.)

I’d have to try it to be sure. But if I did, I’d want one of those really grainy dark loaves, and a sharp cheddar. And one thin layer of grape jelly over the top. Salted butter in the pan, too.

I’ll keep you guys posted! Might have to buy some grape jelly first, and make a wheat loaf. 👀

To defend another point: cream cheese and jelly fits in just fine if all your other friends are packing Romeo and Juliet from home—theirs is just better.

We’re talking a strawberry or raspberry jelly and a cream cheese. So…really that’s just a cheesecake sandwich your picky kid can eat without breaking into hives.

It’s just aggressively sweet the way a lot of kid food is because kids can taste bitter flavors better. It’s not something I’d pack for myself now as an adult, but it was something I could eat when I was say. Seven years old, and in the top one percent underweight and small for kids my age. But again: it’s just a cheesecake on toast.

If it makes you feel any better about your food crimes, my wife has informed me that it's apparently incorrect to put grape jelly on a grilled cheese. I still think I'm the normal one here but no one else agrees with me :(

Everyone stop bullying me and bully this person

[madlori]

Food items I am never without.

I like to cook, so I’m constantly picking up oddball ingredients for Some Recipe I found on a blog (usually Smitten Kitchen). But there is some stuff I just ALWAYS keep in stock.

1. Thomas’ Everything Bagel Thins. I eat these for breakfast almost all the time when I’m at home (which is 4 days out of 7). I eat them with cream cheese, Everything Bagel seasoning from TJ’s, and a salted tomato slice. Perfection. They’re also good with some schmear of your choice and lunch meat. A full bagel is just too much starch for me, these are perfect. 

2. Pre-cooked bacon. I buy this gargantuan envelope from Costco. It lasts a few months and is well worth it. Two strips in a folded-over paper towel for 50 seconds and you’ve got nice crisp bacon, for eating, crumbling on a salad, putting in eggs, or in my case, making a wrap sandwich. It’s so much quicker, easier and neater than cooking up bacon from raw.

3. Mission low-carb tortillas. I don’t particularly keep low-carb but these taste exactly like regular tortillas so why not? My go-to work-at-home-day lunch is a wrap made with these, lettuce, chicken strips (which I either cook up myself or get at Costo, they sell great packs of them), pickled red onions (which I make myself by the boatload and am never without), mayo and two strips of bacon. Sometimes I’ll make a quick-and-dirty fish taco with frozen fish sticks in the air fryer, some coleslaw or broccoli slaw mix (or just lettuce in a pinch), pickled red onions and chili sauce. They’re also good to make egg wraps.

4. Frozen acai berry bowls with granola. Another Costco find. I tote one of these to work for morning breakfast and sometimes have them for a snack. They’re really good. One minute in the micro direct from frozen makes them still freezy but soft enough to stir up. This is the item that makes me want a chest freezer for my basement - they come in packs of six and I just don’t want to be at Costco every two weeks.

4. Wasa crispbread. I eat this all the time. When I do avocado toast, it’s on these. A schmear of cashew spread, avocado, lemon olive oil and either salt, dill seasoning from TJ’s or Tajin.

5. Crystal Light. This is what I drink 90% of the time (although Spindrift seltzer has been gaining ground of late). I don’t make up a pitcher of it. I mix up six packs each of lemonade and iced tea together to make Arnold Palmer Crystal Light, put it in a lil dispenser, and mix it up by the glass in these big 30 oz plastic hockey game souvenir tumblrs which are surprisingly sturdy and useful. I go through this so much that I order the packages by the dozen from Amazon on Subscribe & Save. It really helps me put down enough water every day.

6. Taylor Farms chopped salad kits. These kits are the BOMB and they make a very satisfying, big salad. I usually add some chopped chicken and/or hard boiled egg to give it some protein. They have MANY flavors. Creamy Dill Pickle is my favorite. 

7. Mini snacking cucumbers. This one’s hard because they go bad fast. TJ’s has the best ones although the Costco ones are good too but only intermittenly available. I eat these like candy, dipped in Tajin (something else I am never without).

[midnightstar-90]

Live Laugh Love~ Georgie Cooper x Reader

A/N: This is actually the 4th part, but I forgot to post it on tumblr. Hope you enjoy.

Summary: Sheldon refuses to eat solid food after a choking scare.

My Masterlist | My Taglist

A Therapist, A Comic Book, and A Breakfast Sausage

Y/N's POV

After my parents died and George's near-death experience you would think that this family would be tired of scaring me, but now, let me tell you why.

Missy, Sheldon, and I were sitting at the table eating our breakfast that Mary made. Georgie was at the counter putting jelly on his toast. Mary starts to rush us, so that we're not late for school.

Sheldon started choking on his breakfast, but Missy took it as Sheldon making faces. I look up, and my eyes widen like a deer in headlights. "Missy, he's not making faces on purpose. He's choking," I say scared. Mary hears me and rushes over to Sheldon.

Georgie continues to jelly his toast, and I run to get George. I quickly hear Georgie say, "I wish she would run that quick when I need her." I roll my eyes and keep going.

George makes it to the table and tries to smack the sausage out of Sheldon's mouth. Missy yells out, "Sheldon's gonna die! Sheldon's gonna die!" I knew she was scared, so I didn't say anything. What I did see was Georgie continuing to eat, while his brother was choking. I looked at my best friend and glared. He just shrugged his shoulders in response.

I turn back around to see George has flipped Sheldon upside down and was trying to shake it out of him. Mary calls 9-1-1 and I remember something I learned in Health class. "George, Heimlich!" I yell out just before Mary.

George goes for the Heimlich, and Sheldon spits out the sausage. I saw Sheldon look at something before he spits out his food. I looked and there goes Georgie licking his jelly knife.

Mary is quick to see if her son is okay. He says, "you have to... throw away... that jelly!" Georgie just looks at him, and I look at Georgie.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

At School

I close my locker, which is right next to Georgie's. "I should have shoved that knife down your throat," I say as we start to walk to class. "Why, what did I do?" I scoff and side-eye the boy. "Your brother was on the verge of death, and you just sit there eating toast" "It's not like I could have done anything," he says casually. I walk off angry.

We make it to class on time. We sat down and our teacher started telling us about the canned food drive. When Sheldon walked in, she stopped her talk with us to see why Sheldon was late. She read the note Mary gave to Sheldon and was immediately heartbroken. "You poor thing, you had a medical emergency?" The teacher asked the 9-year-old.

"How come the teacher has more sympathy for your brother than you do?" I sarcastically ask. Georgie just shrugs again. I turn back in my seat to face the front with a 'humph'.

Sheldon explains to the teacher that he choked on a sausage. The students start laughing at Sheldon. I stand up angry, "You better shut it, before I shove a sausage down your throat!"

Georgie looks at me scared. He should be scared. Just because I'm a girl does not mean I don't know how to defend myself.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Me and Georgie were at lunch. I look over to see if Sheldon was okay. He was just staring at his sandwich. "Why are you staring at Sheldon?" Georgie asks as I get up. I start heading for Sheldon as I say back, "because I care about him." Georgie just goes back to eating.

I walk over to Sheldon and Tam. "Hey Sheldon, aren't you gonna eat your food?" I say worried. "No, I'm not hungry," Sheldon says looking down. "I offered him my soup," Tam says.

I wonder what's going on. All I know is this Tam kid is freaking me out. Ever since I met the kid, every time I come near him he gives me googly eyes.

"Well, if you want, one of the seniors bought me a smoothie," I offer the worried child. "Is it organic," Sheldon asks. "I think so. He got it from that new smoothie place," I say nodding my head. "Sure." Hearing those words made me happy. I went to grab the smoothie and then gave it to him. I went back over to Georgie with a smile.

Sheldon's POV

"Dang, she shares food and she's hot. You got one hot friend," Tam says watching the girl who's like my sister walk away. I sip the smoothie before saying, "one, she's my brother's best friend, and two, she's like my sister." Tam looks disappointed, but I just finish the smoothie.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Y/N's POV

Dinner

We were all sat down for dinner when Meemaw starts talking about Mr. Rosenbloom. "You know that Mr. Rosenbloom with the furniture store over by the steakhouse?" Connie asks Mary. Mary tells her mother that she doesn't know. Connie tries to remind Mary by calling the man a 'Hebrew fella with the comb-over'.

Mary corrects her mother, but Meemaw didn't really care. George just drinks his beer, while we ate our food.

Meemaw tells us that Mr. Rosenbloom asked her to dinner. My ears perk up and I say, "awe Meemaw, that's great." Mary asked her if she was gonna say yes, but Meemaw makes an inappropriate comment. "Okay Meemaw, I see you!" I say cheering her on.

Mary corrects both of us. Meemaw defends with, "What? I said 'dessert'." She turns to us and says, "I figured from the cheering that Y/N knew what I meant, but did you kids know that I was talking about sex?"

I knew Georgie knew. But Sheldon gives a confused face then says "no".

Mary notices that Sheldon wasn't eating. "Why aren't you eating?" Mary says. Sheldon tells his mother that he's scared to eat. George thought it was because of the food touching, but Sheldon says he's afraid he'll choke again.

Meemaw didn't know that Sheldon choked on a sausage. Me and Georgie explain our morning to her. "Sheldon almost died this morning," I started. "Dad was shaking him upside down like a ketchup bottle," Georgie followed.

Mary continues to try to get him to eat, but Sheldon doesn't budge. "Dibs on the tater tots," Georgie says earning a smack on the arm from me. "What? you want some." I roll my eyes continuing to eat.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next day was the same way. Sheldon didn't want to eat, so Georgie stole his food. I look to Meemaw and say, "I offered him a smoothie yesterday and he drank it just fine." Connie gets an idea and offers up to blend up his food. She leaves to go blend his food, and I give Sheldon a smile and a thumbs up.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Georgie and I were finishing up getting ready for school. I was brushing my teeth, and Georgie was checking out his hair. "Are you still not talking to me? It's been almost a week. Speaking of which, where have you been. Except for practice, home, and school, I don't see you anywhere," Georgie says turning to me.

I spit the toothpaste out, rinse my mouth, and then turn to the boy. I fix one of his hairs and walk off. Even mad, I still care for the boy.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What Georgie didn't know about me was that ever since before my parents died I loved superheroes. Their powers and backstories always amazed me. When I learned to read, I asked Mary and George for a comic. Now, every month, Mary and George give me $5 to pick out comics.

I was sat in the back corner of the comic store. I was a usual customer, so the owners would always tell me when there are new installments. I like the Avengers, a lot of them have a backstory similar to mine, like Spider-man or Ironman.

The bell to the door rings, and I see a certain little boy walk in. 'Isn't he supposed to be at therapy? Since when does Sheldon like comics?' I don't interact with him, I just watch.

He wants an X-men comic. Then I notice Tam, which I don't remember him coming in. They have a conversation until Sheldon keeps walking and runs into me.

I give him a very suspicious-looking look. "Aren't you supposed to be in therapy?" I ask with an eyebrow raised. "Yes, but I have to find out what happens in X-men #137." I laugh and show him where it is.

"Listen, I've had my problems. I've been to therapy. I know things can be scary, but we have to learn to face our fears. Your parents must be worried. You can't run from things you don't like," I try my best to help him. "Here let me show you something."

I take Sheldon to my corner in the back, and I show him my comics. "I read these comics because they remind me of me and my fears. They help me, and they could possibly help you too." I say before seeing Tam, "Tam! here I'll show you." I invite Tam to read with us.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Georgie's POV

Missy, Meemaw, and I all decided to get a blizzard from Dairy Queen. We started talking. "Meemaw, are you ever gonna have any more babies?" Missy asked. Meemaw exclaims, "Good Lord, no!" "She's too old to have any more babies," I say.

Meemaw tells us, "Don't have to have 'em. You live long enough, your hair and your teeth start falling out, you start wetting the bed, you get to be one." I laugh and say, "haha, that's funny. We're gonna have to put a diaper on you." "You won't be laughing when you're doing it," she says, "I might be." We all laugh.

I continue to eat my blizzard when Missy asks Meemaw who's smarter besides Sheldon and Y/N. We argue a bit about it, but Meemaw says it's not about them.

"Yeah right, everything is always about Sheldon. Y/N won't talk to me, because Sheldon forgot to chew," I say, sad because I miss my best friend. "Yeah, sometimes it's like we don't exist."

Meemaw looks at us and says, "I guess Sheldon does get most of the attention. Maybe that's a good thing. If it weren't for him your parents would be on your ass all the time. And Georgie, don't you think that maybe, Y/N was scared because she already lost two of the most important people in her life, and almost another. That girl has been part of our family for years, and no matter who it is, she will still be scared to lose another family member."

"Yeah. I guess I never thought about it that way before," I say thinking about how our lives could be different without Sheldon. I also never gave Y/N's emotions about the incident much thought.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Y/N's POV

I guess what I said helped Sheldon because he ate that piece of licorice-like a boss.

Tam, Sheldon, and I were walking home. We see police officers at our house. Tam dips, but not before yelling at me, "Call me, beautiful!" I cringe and walk home.

We make it into the house, and Sheldon is immediately yelled at. Mary thanks me for bringing him home, but I tell her that that is what family does. She smiles and I go to talk to Georgie.

"Hey," I call out knocking on his open door. "You're talking to me now?" Georgie asks putting away his magazine. "Well, I'm in a good mood. Sheldon faced his fear of chewing, partly because of me," I say giving myself a pat on the back.

"Well, I'm happy for you. And I know before I didn't really pay attention to your feelings, but I want you to know I'm sorry." Georgie hugs me and I hug him back. "Sheldon and I stopped by DQ for a blizzard, but I couldn't finish mine. You want it?" "Sweet! I get my Best Friend back and another blizzard."

I laugh and start to head out. "Good night," is all I hear before entering my room.

[debbiebeary]

Disgust and Ecstacey

3

Hayden’s belly jiggled and wobbled violently in the dim, hippy light of the room. The combination of the incense and marijuana haze made the doughy expanse of his body appear even softer and more rounded. The curtains were slightly drawn and in the light was a smoky beam, the rest of the room was lit by red string lights and a few kitschy lamps.

In Hayden’s chunky arms, arms with those beautiful biceps that mushed up against his moobs into a cellulity pillow, he carried Ben and Jerries, peanut butter sandwiches, and some bananas (hey, digestion is important, ok?)

“Alright little britches” said Hayden, time to get to three hundred!” He said as his uncovered belly, lightly shined with sweat, surged forward even more as he added to the snacks already present on the table (chocolate, korean fried chicken and potato chips).

Dillon laughed.

“Oh come on I only reached two fifty yesterday!”

“Only two fifty!?” Cried a voice from across the swirling aromatic haze.

“Only two fifty?!” He repeated, standing up and revealing his own two hundred seventy pound form, he put his meaty paws onto his lightly dark furred, pear shaped body and gave it a strong jiggle, “That’s forty pounds since you arrived, it’s only been a month and a half! If you keep it up you’ll be bigger than me!”

Dillon looked down at his stretchmark covered gut and heaving moobs, which themselves had stretchmarks emerging near the armpits and also stretchmarks on his biceps too. His growth surely exceeded his own expectations. And it didn’t help that Garry, whom was the coffee shops resident chaser turned chub himself, was always feeding Dillon super creamy specialty coffees free of charge throughout his shift.

“Yeah. Who knows,” he began, a smug grin forming between his fattening cheeks and burgeoning double chin, both beginning to dominate his features even under his thickening beard, “perhaps I will hit three hundred.”

“Well it isn’t a matter of ‘if’, it’s a matter of ‘when’. And either way,” Hayden paused to toke the joint he just lit, stifling a cough before he continued, “either way, you gotta eat to make that happen, pig.” And without warning he took a peanut butter sandwich and crammed into an unsuspecting Dillon’s fattening maw. Garry wore a lascivious smirk on his face as he yet again watched Hayden work his gluttonous magic on Dillon.

“Remember!” the three hundred fifty pound blonde stud mumbled after tearing a massive chunk out of his own sandwich, “we match each other bite for bite, no matter what” he continued, swallowing the mouthful into his growling, churning tank, giving it an emphatic slap.

Dillon chewed and swallowed his own mouthful,

“Yes big bear-“

But he was interrupted by Hayden once again plugging his airways with the second half of the sandwich.

Dillon could feel the scale shattering beneath his feet already.

Again and again, handfuls of chocolate brownies, of chips, fried chicken (with an inspired melted Velveeta American cheese dip) were shoved into the awaiting Dillon's mouth by the bronze skinned, blonde haired hunky blob. Though Garry was the bottom, Hayden, a versatile boy who when he was a top, was a very dominant top. This extended to feeding.

Though Hayden was attracted to Dillon, he found force feeding him aggressively to be somehow even more… penetrating. More satisfying than the thought of fucking him ever could be. He was morphing Dillon’s body, potentially towards a permanent absolution. He may never go back to the way he was before the summer began.

Dillon could see the twisted thrill in Hayden’s eyes as he crammed in handful after handful and despite the overstuffed pain in his abdomen he kept opening his mouth, begging again and again for the ruin of his once athletic form.

Hayden had heard tales of the pretentious condescension of Brian. Of his prideful taste in skinny boys, his carbon-copied preferences. In this a dark desire lay, one in which to sever Dillon from his obnoxious fuckbuddy. All he would need were calories and time.

Of which he incidentally had both.

“Damn Hayden, you’re turning him into a blimp!”

“Bwaaap!” Was Hayden’s guttural reply, “ugh, fuck. S’cuse me! Turning myself into a blimp while I’m at it too, don’t ya think Gerry boy?”

Gerry was too busy drooling at them both with big horny puppy eyes to respond, but Hayden’s smile curled with smug deviousness.

Eventually the snacks dwindled until nothing was left and Dillon's already stretchmark laden gut was now bright red and itchy with swelling.

Hayden smacked Dillon’s belly, causing him to wince,

“Fuck!”

“Sorry fatboy, couldn’t help myself, you look like you got a full litter in there.”

“Yeah. A hundred food babies in one. Feel like imma puke.”

Hayden snatched a lit joint that Gerry was enjoying and popped it in Dillon’s mouth, Dillon sucked in frantically,

“Make yourself useful, Gerry. Rub his belly with some of that CBD/tiger balm concoction I made, can’t have him purging all these beautiful calories now can we?”

“N-no sir!” Said Gerry, Gerry always turned into a bitch when Hayden threw his weight around.

“Good boy. Alright Dillon, just hold tight,”

“Uuuuhh. Ok. No I can have that last drumstick then we’re done, I’d rather get this over with and just have some cuddles after.”

“Yeah alright, big dude.”

Hayden let Dillon sink his teeth into the glistening red drumstick, courtesy of the local fried chicken restaurant, Han Ten, Han for the name of the chubby korean bear who owned the pace, ten for ten different glazes. Toasted Perilla, butter honey, spicy, lemon, sweet and sour etcetera. They even had a Ghanaian spicy peanut butter based sauce that was a real zinger. But the one they had was the hybrid honey butter/gochujang ketchup, the K-Supreme with American Cheese Dip, toasted garlic chips and green onions to finish, Dillon’s favourite thing in the world besides Hayden’s succulent puckered-in belly button.

Dillon, after finishing the last bite, let out a rather meaty burp and panted out:

“That’s it, all done…” struggling to breathe, “but it isn’t as bad as last time, uuurap, I’m feeling waaay less sick now, Hayden?”

Hayden was in the kitchen, the fridge door shining it’s menacing white light upon Hayden’s summer- bronzed, food-speckled gut. When Hayden caught Dillon's eye reflected in it was his own evil scheming.

From the glowing gainers bastion of the fridge, like an amulet or treasure of untold power, Hayden withdrew a gallon of chocolate milk.

“Uurp! Fuck, no Hayden that’s pushing it too far! There is no way, mmmlf!”

“Hahaha, you like this funnel? Just got it,” but Dillon managed to spit it out

“Hayden no! Even splitting it it’s way too much for me! I’m too packed!”

Hayden’s face took on a demonic appearance as, with the sun now fully set, the red lights stretched the shadows across his face into l demented forms.

“Whoah, shit this is strong weed.” Dillon suddenly remarked,

“Yeah I cut it with a bit of salvia too, gives everything a nice… twinkle.”

“Well I’m not sure ooouhf!” Hayden shoved the tube back into Dillon's mouth,

“You didn’t let me finish… I’m not splitting this with you, you’re taking ALL OF IT!”

“Whoah, Hayden! You sure? He seems pretty full.”

“He’ll be fine once you get your lips wrapped around his cock, Garry.”

Garry grew quiet.

“RIGHT GERRY!?!”

“Yes sir…”

“Good boy… ok Dillon, open up your throat and GUZZLE! Garry. Uh. Do the same.”

As Garry face planted Dillon’s dick, Dillon was reinvigorated and began to suck down the sweet chocolaty goodness. Garry was a master, sucking Dillon’s meaty head, flicking his slit with his tongue, and deepthroating him like a pro, he never let Dillon get used to his w and was building up to a climax rapidly.

“Yeah you fat fuck, we keep this up you’ll be 400 in no time.”

Dillon moaned. The Gallon was now only half.

“Come on tubbs, you know you want it, you want to beach yourself on the couch and eat and smoke and drink until you’re nothing but a big fat whale.” The gallon was empty but still Dillon sucked on the tube.

“Greedy pig. You still want more?”

withdrawing the tube from Dillon’s mouth, his tortured stomach released a torrent of pressure as Dillon sprayed out a fat wet belch which rolled across the hazy apartment like thunder.

“UUURRRRP!”

In the same moment Hayden, smirking demonically, leaned down and pinched Dillon’s nipple, Dillon convulsed and shot his load, hosing down Garry’s throat with his seed.

“FUUUUCK!” He screamed in agonizing pleasure.

Garry nearly choked on Dillon’s load.

“Holy fuck. Looks like Dillon isn’t the only one that sucked down a gallon of sweet nectar, eh Garry?”

Garry let out a burp of his own before responding.

“I’d say it’s rather more savory but yeah. Basically.”

“Come on, help this fat fuck up, I wanna weigh him.”

“Urrp, fuck guys won’t you give me a second?”

“No fucking way, I wanna see the damage we did, let’s go tubbs!”

After laboring them to the bathroom, they made him stand unaided, swaying dizzily under his own strength after a few minutes of assistance, finally the scale read out its deliberation.

Hayden screamed in disbelief:

“FUCK ME! Two sixty five!?!”

[findingvigilante]

Date: May 18, 2022

I was ready to give up on my search for answers at this point. With everything I've gathered, it felt like I just found a whole lot of something and a whole lot of nothing at the same time. Every "lead" was a dead end. Everyone I've spoken to gave little to no information. Most weren't even willing to talk to me out of fear Vigilante might be hiding in the trees and would swoop down on them or something. This wasn't getting anywhere.

I'm not Lois Lane. I don't dive headfirst into danger. I most certainly don't have a hunky superhero in spandex to come and save me whenever I find myself in a sticky situation either. Especially not when I was risking my own neck for a story about a serial killer that could quite literally take me out at any given moment (antihero, actually. Vigilante is an antihero. The term came to me last night in my sleep). Defending myself was the only option and I don't even know how to properly make toast let alone make a fist and punch someone. I'm also pretty certain that I won't even have time to make a fist to punch Vigilante. I'd be dead on the ground before the thought even crossed my mind.

Speaking of Lane, the finance department of the Planet called me today and asked why I wasn't showing up to work. Which was weird because I sent in my resignation weeks ago so they should've gotten it by now. I explained that I had returned home to Evergreen to chase a story I was interested in for a while. I also explained that the sports section just wasn't cutting it for me and I wanted to do more than just cover the latest in baseball or football. Surprisingly, they listened to what I had to say before explaining that I wasn't supposed to leave work until the resignation was fully processed. That being said, they said that it went through without any issues and wished me good luck on my story before hanging up (they also said that the Planet would welcome me back with open arms if my story lead to a dead end). They had no idea that that scenario was looking more and more likely.

Today I decided to do some work at O'Rourkes. It was quiet for a Wednesday afternoon and the place wasn't as busy as what it usually is on a Friday night or the weekends. It wasn't just a bar but a restaurant as well so I ordered a club sandwich and a salad and did some work while I ate. The tv overhead was playing something about the Justice League but living in Metropolis for so long has made me immune to hearing about them. The same goes for Superman. You hear about him so often that the excitement of seeing him on the news starts to die down after a while. Vigilante, on the other hand, barely made the news which I found both fascinating and weird considering how many people in Evergreen have been killed because of him. The smallest bit of footage of him on the news would send me scrambling for more. I'm desperate for crumbs.

I was about halfway finished with my meal when my contact, Charlie, texted me about an explosion at Glan Tai Bottling Company. When I asked if there was any correlation to Vigilante, they told me I'd have to go investigate myself and see. Fair enough. But before paying for my lunch and heading out, I did a little research on Glan Tai. It was founded in 1979 in Little Cork, Washington and they bottled mostly milk and produced their own glass for bottling. It was a two hour drive outside Evergreen so if I wanted to get a scoop (or any crumbs), I'd have to leave now before it got dark.

It was 5:47 when I arrived in Little Cork. After quickly looking up the address, I drove there only to find the place crawling with cops and reporters alike. Naturally I saw Detective Song and Fitzgibbons amongst the police officers, so I quickly ducked under the police tape while no one was looking and slipped inside the building. I didn't want to get caught nor did I want to be asked why I was here because they'll know the why. But they won't understand it and just think it's weird that I have a borderline obsession with a killer.

The inside of the building was a mess. Glass strewn everywhere, debris from the explosion flown in every direction. There were even small fires still burning here and there; it was a disaster. But on top of the glass and debris there was also this weird, green substance that I've never seen before. With a pen, I picked some up with the tip and watched as it oozed off back down to the floor. It was like honey but a little thicker. There was also a weird smell coming from it that was unlike anything my nose has ever breathed in before.

The scene didn't get any less gruesome as I made my way further into the building. It was like walking through a haunted house at an amusement park with the amount of blood on the walls, floor and ceiling. It would've been comical if it weren't for the heap of dead bodies lying everywhere. And I mean everywhere. Some with their limbs still attached. Others....weren't as lucky. There were a lot of bodies here for a company that went out of business in 2009 but I didn't let the sight of them deter me as I made my way around to snap photos of everything I was seeing. Though the smell of both death and whatever it was that they were bottling was starting to make me feel a bit sick to my stomach.

There was a room right at the very back that grabbed my attention. It looked like an office from afar and as I drew nearer to it, I could see what looked like servers and computers sputtering for power as the electricity flashed on and off. Upon entering the room, I saw that some kind of fight went down here because the place looked like a wrestling match happened (minus the blood on the floor). I tried tapping on one of the keyboards to see if I could get anything to appear on the screen but it flashed once with these weird symbols before completely dying. I did however find what looked like a USB still plugged into one of the towers so I swiped that before making a run for it back outside when I heard voices outside the office door.

Back at my apartment, I plugged the USB into my laptop and was immediately hit with a wave of bizarre symbols that I've never seen before. After scrolling for nearly five minutes, I decided to send the file to a friend of mine at Metropolis University who was a linguist. If anyone could figure out what language this was, it was them. After doing that, I turned on the tv to see if there was any news regarding Glan Tai and as luck may have it, there was. The reporter stated that the body of a missing gorilla from Evergreen zoo, Charlie (which I chuckled at) was found dead inside the building along with many others who have yet to be identified. Forensics said that the explosion went off in the production line but as for what the cause was, it was still unknown. Which means that I was led into another dead end. Vigilante probably wasn't even involved in this. Why would he target a bottling plant? Also what was that green goo stuff I saw at the plant? What the hell was going on in my investigation? Stuff was just getting weirder and weirder the deeper I dug and it was getting irritating. The more I searched, the more questions I was left with.

Going back to Metropolis was looking more and more likely. I can kiss my Vigilante story goodbye entirely.

Update: I received a text from my friend in Metropolis about the weird flash drive and its bizarre language. It left the hair on the back of my neck standing up.

[fullmoonremus]

Strawberry Jam Sandwich | Regulus Black x Reader

Warnings: Nothing :)

Time/Era: Marauders Era

Word Count: 2.2k

Summary: Y/N Potter and Regulus Black are a match made from heaven, even if other people didn’t expect it. 

Request: hello first of all I really like your writing and hope you and your loved ones are doing well. could you write a regulus black fic? like reader is James’ sister and they get married (because regulus doesn’t die) and years later they meet Harry?

A/N: Thank you and thank you for the request! Let me know how you like it! Enjoy! I love Reg and I’m so excited to FINALLY write for him!! For anyone else wanting a fic; please request away! 

masterlist | read on ao3

Y/N Potter and Regulus Black were a weird pairing in most people’s eyes. Both being the younger siblings of the two most popular guys in school, it made their peers raise their eyebrows. Not to mention, they were in rival houses and seemed to be on opposite sides of the war. But they just worked. 

Y/N was a lot like her older brother, James; very loud and loveable. She was naturally talented on the quidditch field and loved to make friends. It was obvious that she had relationships with people of all the houses due to her outgoing attitude and warm sense of humor. While Regulus also played quidditch, he was much more introverted and shy. He didn’t have many friends, due to being categorized by his surname automatically, so he often kept to himself and spoke only when necessary. Y/N was the talker, Regulus was the listener. 

Funnily enough, Y/N and Regulus met through the means of getting Sirius to make amends with Regulus again. Regulus had cornered Y/N in the library and begged her to help him come up with a plan to talk to his brother. They ended up meeting multiple times in the following weeks and grew to be friends. 

Regulus adored her ability to be interested in small things; she once asked him what a necklace he wore meant. It didn’t mean anything in particular, but she sat and listened to him speak about his jewelry for almost 15 minutes. No one ever took the time to listen to what the younger Black sibling had to say. 

To their ‘plan sessions” in the library, Y/N always brought a strawberry jam sandwich to munch on. They met after her quidditch practices, so James and Sirius wouldn’t find them, which meant she needed a snack to keep her energy levels up. She always offered him half, which the rather regal boy would decline nearly every time. Nearly. Regulus found her little snack absolutely adorable, especially when the jam got all over her face. It made her lips even pinker, and that much more kissable. 

The sandwich became an inside joke between the two quickly. Even when passing in the halls, they would scoff and find the most outlandish way to mention the food. It wasn’t funny in hindsight, but it was something that connected the two in its ridiculousness. 

~

Regulus paced back and forth among the bookshelves of the Hogwarts library, hoping to bump into his now best friend, Y/N. The library was near empty, as it was Friday night and very close to curfew, so even just looking for her held very little hope. She had mentioned something about having to finish an assignment she was procrastinating, so Regulus hoped she followed his advice to just get it over with. 

The bookshelves were high and blocked most of the ceiling in the room, making the books impossible to read. Long, vertical shadows cast their darkness over almost every inch of the floor and offered very little light to allow him to navigate the maze of shelves.  During the day, of course, this was a different considering the wall of windows that looked over the courtyards. The window seats were some of his favorite places to come and think. And the seats just happened to be his and Y/N’s meeting spot. 

Regulus was about to give up on his search, but he noticed Y/N hunched over an astronomy book, sitting on the floor with her back leaning against a bookshelf. He casually slipped next to her, offering a shy hello. 

“Hey, Black. What are you doing here?” 

“I was about to ask you the same thing, Potter. Not exactly the best studying environment.” Regulus tilted his head back until it hit the books and turned his head to see her. 

“Well, I’m trying to save myself from having to do this entire project tomorrow. I have a book, yet you appear literature-less. What’s your excuse?” Y/N moved so she sat with her legs crossed, the thick book laid open on her lap. 

“I came to return this, you left it at our last meeting.” He placed a slightly toasted strawberry jam sandwich on the book. It was wrapped lazily in a green napkin and left an abundance of crumbs on her homework. Upon further inspection, the words will you be my girlfriend? were scribbled messily on the paper in black ink. Y/N’s jaw grew slack as she looked over at the highly attractive man next to her. 

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to, but I just wanted to ask.” 

“Are you being serious?” 

“Dead, Y/N.” 

A smile crept over her features and she held out half of the sandwich. “Suppose we can start our relationship with a snack?” 

Regulus accepted the food, making a subtle crunching noise as he bit into it. “I suppose I can make the exception to eat your exceptionally plain choice in snack food, just this once.” 

~

“I’m sorry, you’re dating who?” James laughs, shrugging his younger sister off before grabbing his broom. 

By this point, Y/N and Regulus have been sneakily dating for more than half a year and Y/N was tired of hiding their relationship. After Regulus and Sirius had failed to rekindle their relationship, Sirius shoved his brother even further away than they started. It hurt the younger black to the point of giving up, but even he was tired of hiding their relationship. He loved Y/N with his entire being, and his jerky older brother couldn’t ruin that. 

“Have you ever even talked to Regulus before?” Sirius adds, grabbing his own broom to prep for quidditch practice. 

“Yes, and I am dating him. Not sure what’s so hard to understand about that.” 

“We understand it, just don’t believe it. Now, don’t speak about things you don’t understand.” James kicked off the ground and flew in the direction of the quidditch pitch. 

“Don’t understand? Excuse me?!” 

“He’s right. I know you were just trying to prank us, but joking about something that personal isn’t funny, Y/N.’’ Sirius mounts his own broom and flies off after James. 

After practice, Y/N hurried to the library to meet her slightly anxious boyfriend. Regulus knew you were telling Sirius and James, and he knew they would react badly. Y/N saw Regulus sitting on the windowsill furthest from the door and hurriedly walked over. 

“Hey! How’d it go?” He asked after Y/N pecked his lips and sat next to him. Regulus wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close. 

“Not much to tell, really. They said I was trying to prank them and to not talk about things I didn’t understand. Honestly, I kind of wish they yelled.” 

Regulus laughed and kissed her temple. “They’ll come around, I’m not exactly their favorite person so I can see why they don’t believe it. And I’m happy they didn’t yell because I know how you feel when people yell and I don’t want you to feel like that.” 

“Holy shit! Get away from my sister!” James’ voice filled the area, Sirius quick on his heels. They must have been following Y/N after practice. 

~

“Riddle me this, you want to spy for the order and potentially get KILLED?!” Y/N paced around the living room of Regulus and her shared flat. 

It didn’t take long for Sirius to reaccept Regulus back into his life after seeing how he treated Y/N. At first, both older brothers thought Regulus was using Y/N to feed secrets and information to the opposing side of the war. They didn’t accept the couple and wanted Y/N to have nothing to do with the boy. But, after many feelings were hurt and various words were shared, they decided to give the boy a chance. 

Regulus treated Y/N like a queen and made sure his girl knew how much he loved her. He wasn’t very good with words, but his actions spoke volumes. Flower bouquets were gifted periodically, as were small gifts that had a lot of thought put into them. During one of their study dates, he spent over an hour drawing a beautiful portrait of her. Not too long after, he gave her an entire sketchbook of drawings he knew she would love. Whether that was pictures of her friends, family, her favorite flowers, or something as mundane as the bench she loved to sit on, the gift had taken hours and hours of his time. It was obvious that Regulus was in love with his girl. 

After graduating from Hogwarts, both Regulus and Y/N joined the Order of the Pheonix. Regulus still had heavy ties with Voldemort and his family, so Dumbledore asked him if he would consider being a spy for the Order. Even Sirius thought it was a bad idea. But, he had to prove that he wasn’t who he was raised to be. He had to prove himself to not only everyone around him, but to his inner soul. 

“Listen, Dumbledore thinks that there’s a spy that infiltrated the Order and if I can find out who, maybe I can stop it. Think about it, James has a kid, a kid who is very valuable to you-know-who. We haven’t even spent a ton of time with him yet, but I know I can save him if I find the spy.” 

“Yes, I realize that, Reg. But I can’t lose you in the process. We’re supposed to get married and have kids of our own and have a happy life-” Y/N takes a deep breath. “I can’t live without you.” 

Regulus smiles a comforting smile, taking his girlfriend’s hands in his. “I know, darling. I’m not going anywhere. How about this,” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small ring box, presenting it to Y/N. “Let’s get married. I’ve never been a fan of the big white wedding...and all you need is a few witnesses and two signatures. I’m sure Sirius and James would be more than willing to witness. What do you say?” 

Y/N gapes at her boyfriend. “Are you asking me to marry you?!” Regulus laughs and pecks her lips. 

“I love you so much, Y/N Potter. You are the light of my life and I am so lucky to have you. You have brought me so much joy and really made me the best person I could be,” He wipes a tear delicately from Y/N’s skin. “I asked James for his blessing, too, after the last Order meeting. He said he was ecstatic for us. So, Y/N, will you marry me? We can eat strawberry jam sandwiches together for the rest of our lives.”

“Yes! A thousand times yes!”

~

“Hi, little one, I’m your uncle, Regulus, remember?- Ow! Not the hair!” Regulus sat in a suit in the parlor of Potter cottage with one-year-old harry in his lap. Y/N watched from the doorway, decked out in her white cocktail dress and heels. She couldn’t help but gush at the sight of her soon to be husband with a child; it felt so natural. Her heart swelled just thinking about watching him play with their own children. 

“Yeah, he does that, keep him at a distance,” James responded, coming into the room. He was running late, as always, and was trying to tie his tie. “I can’t believe I’m witnessing my baby sister getting married!” 

Harry gargled and reached his hands towards his father. “Dadadadada!!!!” 

“I know, buddy, I’m right here. Hang out with your Uncle Reg for a while, yeah?” James responds, messing with his hair in the mirror. No matter how much he ‘fixed it,’ it all looked the same.

“It’s crazy how he looks so much like you, it’s like you copied your baby photos and made them come to life!” Y/N stated. Harry was almost an exact copy of James, but with Lily’s eyes. 

Sirius came into the room, perfectly dressed with his hair tied back. “Well, are we leaving or not?” He asked, fixing the bowtie around his neck in the mirror for the 8th time. 

“Pa’foo!” Harry squeals and squirms in Regulus’ arms. His grip tightens around the baby before pressing a kiss into his dark curls. 

“No, not Pa’foo! Reg!” Sirius turned towards Y/N and whistled. “Damn, Reggie, not sure how you picked up this one! Look at the legs on her! Phew, lucky I don’t snatch you up myself!” 

“Stop it! Can we please go?” Y/N swatted Sirius’s chest with her bag, embarrassed.

James plucked Harry from Regulus’ lap and hands him to Lily. “Yes, yes. Sorry, let’s go!” James kisses Lily’s cheek and disapperates out of his house.

Y/N walks over to Regulus and offers him a hand. “Ready to go get married?” 

“I’ve never been more ready, my love. “ 

[reidscanehand]

10 Things I’ve Been Enjoying Lately:

(I’m doing this at the suggestion of a therapist because life has been a tad depressing recently, but I don’t want to annoy anyone in my private life by sending them this, so I’m sharing it here. Might Make it a Monthly Thing?)

TW: mentions of food, disordered eating, depression, anxiety, medication, loneliness, and cursing

1. Avocado Toast - As I’ve shared on here a few times before, I have lots of issues with food and disordered eating habits. However, I find this meal inexplicably comforting. I get up, take my meds, wait about an hour and drink my coffee and then make this meal. I get in some fiber, a healthy fat, and some protein (I top it with eggs) and I really love it. I hesitate to call it a safety food because I know those have really bad connotations, but this meal makes me feel full without feeling sick and I never regret eating it.

2. “And She Was” by The Talking Heads and “Come On! Feel the Illonoise!” by Sufjan Stevens - These songs make me feel like that girl. They’ve both been added to my regular playlists and when either of them comes on, I like to roll all my car windows down. It makes me feel like a million bucks.

3. “Last Week Tonight with John Oliver” - The news fucking stresses me out, but I like to stay informed. This show makes me laugh (my absolute favorite thing to do ever) while learning and staying updated.

4. The Silent Treatment by Abbie Greaves - I recently read this and it made me cry, but it’s beautifully written and I really enjoyed it.

5. My coworkers - I think I’m actually making friends (?) which is remarkable because I’m absolutely crap at making friends. However, I do believe I’ve conned one or two people into enjoying my presence in the world, which is very nice and I’d absolutely die for the lot of them.

6. Calling my sister - I was living with my sister and then she got an amazing job opportunity and had to move. I miss her loads, but I’ve found that calling her once a week for an hour at a time is really helpful in curing this.

7. Cleaning my apartment - I hate that I love this, but it genuinely makes me feel better to be in a clean space, which I know is really obvious, but when you’re depressed/have ADHD, etc. it’s really hard to focus on that kind of stuff. I have laundry days, I clean up after making meals, and I don’t give myself a time limit. I just try to do it once a day and it really does help.

8. Following comfort accounts - There are magical human beings that make specific comfort Tik Toks and YouTube videos. I used to be a little embarrassed at how genuinely comforting I found them, but I’m trying to be less judgmental of my own self and, honestly? Fuck it! If something is genuinely helping you (and doesn’t hurt you or anyone else) do it. Especially something as simple as following a man who cosplays as a butler calming you down in stressful situations or a guy opening Japanese gashapons and reacting to how cute the content is.

9. Brownie Crisp Espresso Ice Cream Sandwiches - I’m deeply obsessed with Trader Joe’s, to an almost embarrassing extent, but this ice cream sandwich is the greatest thing ever. First of all, I think ice cream sandwiches are the best dessert of all time because it combines my two favorite desserts (ice cream and cookies) into one, but this combo is just stellar. Again, I’ve got a lot of food issues. Until the pandemic, I hadn’t had an ice cream sandwich since 2018. I wouldn’t let myself have them. One night during 2020, I got in my car and drove for a long time. I finally stopped at an all-night truck stop to get gas. Because it was so late, I had to mask up and go inside to pay and I bought an ice cream sandwich because I hadn’t eaten dinner. This particular ice cream sandwich brings me that same amount of comfort. I can’t explain it, but it makes me happy and that’s all that matters, really.

10. My Routine - I have ADHD so routine is really important to me. I’m also a Virgo, so, take that as you will. I have a little routine that I do everyday and, honestly it’s helped loads. I change it every now and then, but I find it really comforting. It really, really helps my anxiety, like, knowing that my workout routine lasts for two Criminal Minds episodes, so I can watch them (listen to them) and zone out at the gym so I don’t get uncomfortable. Or knowing exactly what I need when I go to the grocery store so I don’t get too overwhelmed. I require myself to drink 24oz of water before every meal because it reminds me to drink water (meaning that I’m finally drinking the right amount of water in a day and it reminds to eat all at the same time). They’re not always easy tasks, but doing them fixes small parts of bigger issues.

~~~

I don’t sing as much anymore. I don’t go on walks. I don’t make pancakes every weekend. I still smile less. I don’t take myself on movie dates anymore. And I’m not sure why. What I do know, though, is that little things like all the stuff on this list make me feel better. They don’t fix everything; doing my dishes doesn’t cure my disordered eating or anything like that. But it is helping and I’m still trying and I think that’s all I can hope for right now.

Love you all xx

[abused-sides]

Hungry [dead dove: do not eat]

    Trigger warning: someone dies from a food allergy and it’s VERY graphic, it’s an unsympathetic character. This is also written from someone who has a ton of severe food allergies, including the one that’s used, so it’s not some random asshole making light of a situation. Abusive relationships, death, murder, unsympathetic character is murdered

note: please read the trigger warnings and do not fucking read if it’ll bother/trigger you, this is the last warning

    xxx 

    Every morning, Janus ran out to buy him and Remus coffees while Remus stayed behind and burnt their breakfast. 

    Logan woke up to the smoke detector screaming and the rest of their roommates groaning while Roman frantically waved a blanket and snapped at his brother (Janus still smiled when he came home). It was as good of an alarm clock as any. 

    Every morning, Logan scraped together breakfast for a boyfriend he didn’t love. 

    Remus and Janus’ voices carried over from the living room as they ate on the couch. Logan used the burnt remnants of their stove to make bacon and eggs, something he could cook in his sleep. He wasn’t sleeping, though—He was focused on Remus and Janus. 

    “So,” Remus stole a piece of bacon and talked with his mouth full, “when’s the oaf getting up?” 

    Janus sipped at his coffee. “Obligatory defensive comment incoming,” he murmured, and Remus wrapped an arm around his waist. 

    “Don’t make fun of him,” Logan announced. 

    As much as Patton begged everyone to get along, Remus was never one to hide how he felt. Neither was Jaxon. 

    “You know he doesn’t do it on purpose, and you know he’ll be down here any second,” he whispered, and bumped Remus with his hip, who laughed. “Get out of here!” 

    Remus finished the bacon and said, “I gotta get to work anyway.” 

    That didn’t stop him from making out with Janus a good few minutes before leaving. 

    Jaxon stumbled into the kitchen sleepily. 

    “Morning, J,” Logan said quietly. 

    He hated Jaxon’s first appearance—he was too tired for Logan to tell what type of mood he was in. He used to stay quiet until he knew for sure, but Jaxon snapped at him once and said, “When you don’t say good morning, it feels like you’re mad at me or you don’t care about me.”

    Logan always said good morning now.

    Jaxon ignored him, took his plate, and went back upstairs. Logan relaxed. 

    “Just let me know when you want me to kill him for you,” Janus sneered, then ducked into his and Remus’ room. 

    Roman left for work next, singing on his way out, followed by Patton, who kissed Logan’s cheek and told him to stay safe. Virgil worked nights and didn’t wake until well after 3pm. Janus used noise-cancelling headphones while he worked. As much as Logan tried, he couldn’t get a shift today. He was essentially alone with Jaxon. 

    His stomach churned. 

    He went to his computer. 

    It didn’t take long for Jaxon to come back downstairs. He wrapped his arms around Logan’s shoulders and nuzzled into his neck. 

    “What’s going on?” Jaxon asked. “You’re tense.” 

��   Logan’s shoulders relaxed. “I just have a lot of work to do.” 

    “So? Take a break. Come hang out with me.” 

    “Jaxon…” Logan frowned at the screen. “I have a deadline.” 

    Jaxon yanked his arms back. “Are you mad at me or something?” 

    Logan looked over his shoulder. “What? No. Why would I be mad?” 

    He crossed his arms over his chest and scowled, brown eyes hard. “Because you haven’t hung out with me all week. I never see you anymore.” 

    “I work right here in the living room because you wanted to see me more,” Logan insisted. “And we watched three movies last night. We can watch three more tonight.” 

    “Well I don’t wanna force you.”

    Janus’ door creaked open. “That’s exactly what you want to do. Can you two quiet down?” 

    “Come with me,” Jaxon growled under his breath and grabbed Logan’s wrist. 

    Logan stumbled after him. 

    “HEY!” Janus stormed forward and grabbed Logan’s other wrist. “He has a deadline. He needs to work. Have you no manners?” 

    “Sorry, princess, I wasn’t raised in a castle.” Jaxon yanked Logan hard enough for his shoulder to ache. 

    “You’re hurting me,” he said desperately. 

    “Let go of him.” Janus’ eyes were deadly slits. His teeth were fangs, his grip of a Boa. 

    Logan pulled—he’d get punished for that later—until Jaxon let go and he stumbled back into Janus’ arms. Janus quickly righted him then took his hands away. Logan shivered. 

    “We’ll talk about this later,” Jaxon mumbled, “when the snake isn’t around.” 

    He turned and stomped up the stairs. The door slammed, and Logan flinched. 

    “I’m sorry,” he spouted as he turned to Janus. “I’m so sorry about that. I didn’t mean to interrupt your work.” 

    “Don’t worry about it.” 

    “And what he said—” 

    “I am a snake. It’s great. Is your wrist okay?” 

    Logan held it up. The skin was clear, but a bruise would surely show. “It’s fine. He almost…” He forced a laugh, “almost dislocated my shoulder, though.” 

    “Let me take a look at it. Sit down.” 

    Logan sat and Janus tugged his loose neckline down enough to expose his shoulder. Janus hummed. 

    “Is it hurting?” 

    “Just a little. I’m okay.” 

    “Let me get some ice.” 

    Janus came back a moment later and settled the icepack on Logan’s shoulder. 

    “Why haven’t you kicked us out?” Logan asked quietly. 

    “Because if he left, you’d go with him. And we like you a lot.” Janus ran his fingers through Logan’s hair, who leaned into the touch. “Besides, we have better plans for him. We’re killing him, remember?” 

    Logan laughed, and prayed to God Jaxon didn’t hear. 

    xxx 

    Logan didn’t see Jaxon again until dinner. Roman and Remus were play-fighting in the kitchen, yelling over the boiling of a stew. Patton and Virgil were watching a horror movie on the couch, Janus sat at their feet. Virgil kept kicking him. 

    Jaxon came down the stairs as Logan asked to help with dinner. Remus quickly took Logan under his arm. 

    “Yeah! Stir this for me. Hey, Jaxon. I’ve got Logan helping me here.” 

    “I missed you at lunch today,” Logan said over his shoulder. “Are you okay? Feeling sick?” 

    “A little,” he mumbled. “Will you eat with me?” 

    Logan melted. “Of course. Remus, is this safe for him?” 

    Remus grabbed Logan’s shoulder. Logan furrowed his eyebrows as they locked eyes. 

    “Yes.” Remus tapped something on the counter. “Janus and Roman helped me.” 

    Logan glanced down. 

    Peanut powder. 

    He swallowed. 

    “It’s perfectly safe for Jaxon.” 

    Blood rushed through Logan’s ears. 

    “No, actually.” Logan sucked in a shuddering breath. “No, I want to make him something myself.” 

    Remus’ shoulders slumped. “I understand. I guess.” 

    “But…” Logan grabbed his hand. “You can make it again if I ask?” 

    Roman set a hand on Logan’s lightly purpled shoulder. “We absolutely can.” 

    Logan got to work making Jaxon grilled cheese sandwiches, and they ate in the living room with everyone else. Jaxon kept wrinkling his nose and pursing his lips like he was rubbing his tongue against the roof of his mouth. 

    “Everything okay, Jax?” Patton asked sweetly. 

    “There’s no peanuts in that, right? Something about the smell is setting me off.” 

    “Nope.” Janus laid his head in Remus’ lap. “We know about your allergy, Jaxon. We’re careful.” 

    xxx 

    That night, Logan stayed up late with Jaxon watching movies. Logan fell asleep cuddled against Jaxon’s chest and woke up the next morning snuggled with him in bed. 

    He hauled himself out of bed, heavy with exhaustion, as the smoke alarm screamed. Janus kissed Remus on the cheek before leaving for their coffees. Remus cracked another egg in the pan. Roman sang Disney at the top of his lungs as he got ready in the bathroom, Virgil pounding on the door demanding that he needed to piss. Patton snapped that there’s another bathroom upstairs and that if those two didn’t stop fighting he’d lose his mind. 

    Logan found a path in the kitchen to grab the stuff for French toast. He pushed aside Remus’ used dishes and ingredients to set his own down. 

    “How are you feeling?” Remus asked as Logan whisked. “You know, about the decision you made.” 

    “Good,” he admitted. “I think it was the right call.” 

    Remus set the spatula down hard. “So how else do you wanna proceed?” 

    Logan’s whisks slowed. “I… I don’t know. Last time I talked about maybe taking a break, he—” 

    “Hey, Jaxon!” Patton greeted cheerfully. 

    Logan snapped his mouth shut. 

    “Morning, handsome.” Jaxon kissed the back of Logan’s neck. 

    He smiled as Jaxon poured them both juice. “It was the right decision.”

    xxx 

    “Logan!” Jaxon bounded down the stairs. “When are you stopping for lunch?” 

    “Um…” Logan shifted in his seat. “I had lunch.” 

    Jaxon stopped. “What?” 

    “It was quick.” Logan pushed back in the chair to face Jaxon. “Just a snack, really. Then I got right back to work.” 

    “Why would you eat without me? I knew it, you are mad at me. We always have lunch together.” 

    “I know, I’m sorry—”

    “If you know, why did you eat without me? What did I even do?”

    “You didn’t do anything!” 

    “But you’re mad at me.” 

    “I’m not mad at you!”

    “THEN WHY WOULD YOU EAT WITHOUT ME?”

    Logan flinched. 

    Jaxon grabbed his wrist and hauled him to his feet. “Don’t be a baby! Just tell me!” 

    He slammed Logan into the wall just as Janus’ door opened. Logan’s head bounced off the paint, his eye erupting in pain. 

    “Get off,” Janus snapped. 

    “This is none of your business! Go back to work!” 

    Janus pulled his phone out of his pocket. He dialed three numbers. 

    “Put the phone down!” 

    “I need someone here right away, my roommate—”

    Jaxon leapt ten steps back. Logan crumpled in on himself, pressed against the wall where Jaxon left him. 

    “I think he’s calming down now,” Janus said into the phone. He raised an eyebrow. “Yes, I would like you to remain on the line.” 

    Jaxon grabbed his wallet and keys, and stormed out. The door slammed and Logan flinched. 

    “He’s gone now. Thank you for your help. Let me ask.” He pressed the phone to his shirt. “Do you want to press charges? Do you want the police to come?” 

    Logan shook his head, eyes watering. “I want to make dinner.” 

    xxx 

    “That again?” Jaxon asked, peering over Logan’s shoulder. 

    Logan stirred the thick broth. “You didn’t get to try it. It’s good.” 

    Jaxon shrugged. “Is your eye okay?”

    “It’ll heal.” 

    He left. Logan grabbed the peanut powder and dumped in a generous amount, then left it to boil and cook down. 

    Everyone stared at Jaxon as they ate. Logan finished his bowl and grabbed seconds. Pale blotches appeared on Jaxon’s face. His lips swelled. 

    “Are you sure this doesn’t have peanuts?” He asked nervously. “I don’t feel great.” 

    “My eye hurts,” Logan announced. 

    “I have some medicine for it.” Remus kissed Logan’s cheek. “I’ll be right back.” 

    Jaxon glared. “Kiss your own boyfriend!” 

    By the time Remus came back, Jaxon’s throat was swelling shut. “Drive me to a hospital,” he demanded in a hoarse voice. 

    Patton knelt between Logan’s legs and applied the cream Remus bought to Logan’s browbone and the top of his cheekbone. 

    “Dinner was good,” Virgil said. “Are you gonna finish yours, Jax?” 

    He glared and stumbled for the door. “What the hell is this?” 

    Virgil shrugged and grabbed Jaxon’s bowl, downing the rest. Roman leaned against the door with his arms crossed. Jaxon threw a punch, but Roman easily ducked against Jaxon’s weak, wobbling frame. 

    “Oh, God, are you okay?” Patton gasped. “Call an ambulance!” 

    Jaxon collapsed to his knees as his body convulsed. His hands dug into the carpet. He vomited, elbows and knees locking. 

    “Shit, did we add peanut?” Roman asked. “Old habits.” 

    “What’s the number again?” Remus stared at his phone in confusion. 

    “What’s… wrong… with you… all…” Jaxon gasped through his throw up. 

    “911, I think,” Logan mumbled. “Are you okay, love?” 

    “I need someone here right away. My roommate is having an allergic reaction. He was eating alone, we didn’t catch it very fast— yes. Okay, I understand. Mhm.” He gave them the address then hung up. 

    Janus, Remus, and Roman turned on the T.V. Logan and Patton got to work cleaning up after dinner. Virgil stared Jaxon down. 

    He was dead before the paramedics arrived. 

    xxx 

    The smoke alarm blared. Logan hauled himself out of the warm bed and came out of Janus and Remus’ room. 

    “Slept long enough,” Janus said, wrapping his arms around Logan’s waist. 

    Logan leaned his head on Janus’ shoulder. “Coffee?” 

    “Yeah. Let’s go.” 

    “Breakfast is almost ready!” Remus called. “Hurry up!” 

    “I HAVE TO PISS, ROMAN!” 

    “THERE ARE TWO BATHROOMS!” 

    Logan got into the car with Janus. Janus pulled out of the driveway and headed towards the nearest coffee shop. 

    “How are you feeling?” Janus asked, reaching over and taking his hand. 

    “Hungry.” 

[camthesolemnone]

Hi, it's like, 11PM, but I just thought of 3 more promising for you:

1: Nightmares. One of them end up eating g nightmares after their married (the severity of it is up to you), and ends up waking up/getting woken up by the other. They try to help them calm down, and yeah.

Hurt/comfort style, bay-beeeee

Crap I made this nightmare a lot more hurtful than I probably should have. Poor Heavy :<

Warnings for violence, harsh insults, and a mention of sex (not explicit).

Also you mentioned "after they're married" so I'm assuming you mean Misha and Josef. No quarrels here, I'll take any excuse to write about them again.

Scout stood in front of him, tapping his foot and his metal baseball bat against the pavement in an irritated fashion. He had stolen yet another one of Heavy's sandwiches and the giant was determined to get it back. What threw Misha off, however, was the man's sudden stop.

It seemed like he wasn't planning on running away anymore.

"So, tons o' fun, you ready to fight me like a man?" Jeremy taunted, shifting back and forth on his feet in a battle-ready position.

The Russian glared at the Bostonian and cracked his knuckles.

"You are the baby man here. All you do is run like big coward. Heavy will show you real strength!" He shot back.

Scout's smirk and the way he twirled his bat in front of himself held not just confidence, but an overwhelming amount of spite. Misha was almost paralyzed by the man's unforeseen change in demeanor.

"Does a real man just sit at home and bang his gay husband while his ma 's dying and his sisters are tryna fend for themselves?"

Suddenly, that state of paralysis came true. Heavy's blood ran cold while his heart sped up to an unhealthy level.

"How...what--it is not like...I DID NOT KNOW SHE WAS ON HER DEATH BED! IT HAPPENED SO SUDDENLY THAT EVEN SISTERS DID NOT KNOW!" He shouted, stepping forward to grab Scout by the collar and knock his lights out, "how do you even know of these things? I never--"

Misha was stunned back into silence. His hand went straight through Jeremy's body, and the nimble runner reeled back before bringing his bat down on the Russian's shoulder. The impact was five times as painful as it should have been for Scout's pitiful muscles, and Heavy was sent to the ground with a startled scream. Why couldn't he touch Scout when the man could hit him? He attempted to stand up and retaliate, but Jeremy placed the handle of the bat on the top of his skull and pushed down, shoving his face into the ground.

"You're a failure, chucklenuts! You failed your team, your family, and you're about to fail yourself!"

Heavy cried out, "Nyet!" but in a flash, Scout had disappeared. After a few hesitant moments, the Russian determined he was in the clear and began to lift himself up. Then, as quickly as Scout had vanished, Spy appeared. The Frenchman unfolded his butterfly knife before thrusting it downwards into Heavy's hand, essentially pinning him to the ground. Misha let out another howl of pain.

"I have places to be, so I will make it quick. Enjoy your stay in hell, fat man!"

Heavy wasn't given a chance to respond, as Soldier and Demoman came crashing down onto his back, grinding their boots into his spine. He squeezed his eyes shut and bit his lip so hard to prevent a whimper from escaping that it started to bleed.

"Pozhaluysta, make it stop."

"You are nothing but a greasy Commie who deserves to have his fingers ripped off one by one!" Soldier yelled.

Demoman smashed a beer bottle on the back of the bear's neck, causing him to let out a choked gasp. A rapid series of lashes from Jane's whip resulted in more shrieks and Heavy bleeding in multiple places.

"I ain't drunk, I just despise you, you blubbery Bolshevik!"

"I HATE YOU, STALINGRAD!"

"You're the most rotten crop in the field, partner."

"I've had a lot of poor souls as targets, but bloody hell! You're past pathetic, ya pig! What's this? I think you might even be bleeding gravy!"

"Mmph mmph hmm! Hudda!"

"Yeah, not so tough now are ya? Are ya!"

Misha couldn't stand it. He was being torn apart from the inside out. What had he ever done to deserve this? Why was his team, his friends, punishing him like this?

"Stop! No more! Heavy has had enough!"

Everyone turned to dust, leaving only one figure standing tall and proud. He almost seemed to glow amidst Heavy's blurring vision.

"Doktor, I made vow to myself that I would never appear so weak in front of you, but please, I beg of you, help me..."

Medic turned around. His initial expression was one of confusion, but it soon transformed into one of cold ill-will.

"And why should I do that?" He asked solemnly.

Misha could feel tears pricking in his eyes.

"Josef, please, I love you. Do you love Heavy? You said you did, on day we got married, on the day before that, so, so many times. Do not tell me you have given up on me as well!"

Josef's features softened with concern for his other half. He bent down towards the trembling, bleeding giant and caressed his cheek.

"Of course I haven't left you, Misha," he whispered with a tiny smile.

Through his agony, Heavy could almost feel his own smile coming on. His love was here. He was going to save him from this prison and clean him up and everything would be normal again.

Then, he felt a blade pierce through his chest. One that could only belong to the Ubersaw.

"I couldn't have left you if I was never yours in the first place."

.

"NO!"

Josef awoke with a start, his breathing almost as rapid as the man sitting next to him. With owlish eyes, he turned his head towards his husband and felt his heart shatter.

Heavy has his arms wrapped tightly around himself. He was crying into his sleeve like a child and his whole body shook with remnants of fear. Medic reached out to place a hand on his shoulder, but then quickly withdrew it when he determined physical contact towards someone unstable wasn't wise. Instead, he lowered his tone to a murmur and called out to Heavy.

"Misha? Meine liebe? What on earth happened?"

The giant continued to shake and sob for another minute, but once he turned his head and saw his beloved doctor next to him, he gasped.

"You are still here!" He cried.

The German's worry intensified.

"Of course I am, geliebte. I will always be here for you. Just what sort of nightmare did you have?"

Without warning, the giant eclipsed the smaller man completely and cried into his hair. His large arms were almost suffocating, but Josef returned the embrace, rubbing his back through his pajama shirt.

"Scout and Engineer and everyone-...and Doktor stabbed me and--"

"Shh, calm down, Misha. It's going to be alright, I'm here now, and I would never hurt you. I love you, meine Bär," Medic mused, putting everything into making his partner feel comfortable again.

Heavy removed his face from the medic's hair and looked him in the eyes, his own still slightly wet.

"Heh, Heavy is such a mess. Leetle baby dream turned ME into the baby," he joked, wiping his left cheek.

Josef took to wiping his right with a comforting thumb, "There is nothing to be ashamed about, Misha. We all have our bad days and nights. I wake up frequently with nightmares too, usually of you or my parents dying."

Heavy's face dropped again.

"You never thought to wake me up? You know Heavy does not mind. I love you very much, Josef. Would climb mountain for you to be at peace."

The German placed a finger over his husband's lips and shook his head.

"We'll talk about that later. Now is about you. Come now, you must feel exhausted."

And he was right. His breakdown had thoroughly wiped him out, and Medic's soft hands rubbing circles on his hip and on his cheek wasn't helping.

Smiling softly, Josef placed a small kiss on his lover's lips, a reminder that they were both safe, before wrapping his own arms around the Russian and laying the both of them back down.

"Don't worry, Misha. I promise you'll dream sweetly now. I'll even make some French toast in the morning, how does that sound?" Medic grinned.

Heavy, however, was still a tad on the anxious side, so he pulled his wonderful husband closer to his chest and kissed the crown of his head.

"Thank you for staying by my side, Doktor. Heavy appreciates you more than you will ever know."

Medic wanted to respond, but Heavy fell asleep almost instantaneously afterwards. Instead, he continued to smile in the darkness and ran a steady hand across the specialist's back until he himself succumbed to the world of slumber.

A promise was a promise. Misha was not tormented further.

[amillionsmiles]

in your bedroom after the war (Dick/Artemis)

Title: in your bedroom after the war Summary: As far as coping mechanisms go, Artemis could be doing worse. At least her method has a gymnast’s ass. / Post-Invasion, pre-Outsiders. Rated M.  A/N: I have one (1) agenda and that is messy grieving fuck buddies who are each other’s ride-or-dies. if you are not into fic that sits squarely in sad feral horny territory, then this is probably not your speed.

[Read and review here] or continue under the cut.  

| GOTHAM

| JANUARY 14, 2017; 12:05 AM EST

Artemis is a bit heavier than she was in her teenage years, but her feet land lightly on the fire escape by the window. An hour ago, she’d called her mom from Metropolis, promising she’d be home by midnight. Ever since her daughter faked her death a year ago, Paula Nguyen has become even more of a worrywart, and Artemis knows that the five minutes she’s running late are going to cause her to receive an earful.

“Didn’t think I’d see you back in this neck of the woods.” A familiar figure drops from the roof above onto the rung below her.

“Nightwing.”

She’s not surprised that he’s been keeping tabs. Officially, he’s been on a leave of absence for the past six months, but Dick, like her, is vigilant in his grief.

She’d come back to Gotham because it put her closer to Metropolis and Beta Squad’s continued investigation of LexCorp, but the truth is that she could have Zeta-tubed from Palo Alto easily. Their—her—apartment had been no good though, not without Wally. So she’d left most of her things in storage to figure out later and moved back in with her mom. On days when Artemis can’t muster the energy to get out of bed, Paula wheels determinedly around the kitchen, ready to whip up some mì xào  or a warm bowl of  mì gói.  They play card games and laugh about how bad Wally was at tiến lên the first time Paula tried to teach him. Your boy has no patience, he always wants to play his strongest cards right away, her mom had teased, and Wally had protested, I make it a rule to always put my best foot forward! and Artemis had loved him even more then.

Loved. Loves. She hates the past tense.

“I mean, were you ever going to ask me to grab coffee?”

She can see the bits of Wally in his cracks. In a room together, it was always easy to tell they were best friends from the way they riffed off each other. The acrobat and the speedster: all verbal gymnastics and fast-moving quips. But unlike Wally, who liked poking fun because he liked getting attention, Dick is at his wittiest when trying to avoid talking about himself.

Artemis reaches out and pulls him to sit down beside her. She makes a show of looking at her watch.

“How’s… 12:15 AM this Saturday?”

Dick pretends to check it against his mental schedule. If his is anything like hers, it probably goes: Wake up. Exercise (beating up bad guys counts). Mourn.

“Yeah, seems like I can swing it.”

“Perfect,” says Artemis, sliding up the glass panes to let them into her childhood bedroom. “I’ve got just the stuff.” 

*

In the kitchen, Brucely stirs briefly from his dog bed to sniff the air and  yip, then curls back asleep. Paula hands Dick a mug, waiting for him to take a sip before saying, “So you were the one who had the brilliant plan to have my daughter fake her death.” 

Dick splutters; from the table, Artemis rises to his defense. “Mom,” she says. “Leave him be.”

Setting his cup down, Dick leans against the cabinets, bending his head slightly and rubbing the back of his neck. He does a good job of appearing chastised, and Artemis wants to roll her eyes, if only because she’s heard from Bette and Raquel that this pose is far too effective at convincing women to want to forgive him or try again.

“I’m not leading much of anything these days, if that’s at all a comfort to you.”

“Hmph.” Paula sniffs. “You live alone?”

“Yeah.” Dick shoots Artemis a questioning look over her mom’s head. Artemis shrugs.

“What do you do to fill the time?”

“A lot of reading. Gotham’s library system actually has a pretty good selection, believe it or not. I’ve also gotten really into meditating.”

“And you don’t sleep.”

Dick stiffens. For the first time, he looks exposed, a boy with too much guilt and too much time on his hands.

“I do. Tonight I was just… restless.”

Paula nods and backs up her wheelchair so she can sit by Artemis, curling her fingers over Artemis’s hand and squeezing. She raises her drink, Artemis and Dick following suit, the three of them toasting to invisible losses.

“Aren’t we all.”

*

Later, back on the fire escape, Dick taps his fingers against the railing, jittery. “I feel like I need to start doing jumping jacks. What was in that stuff?”

Artemis bites back a smile. “Yeah, Vietnamese coffee packs a hit. That’s my bad. Probably should have given you something non-caffeinated at this hour.”

“It’s fine. I’ll jog it out, or something.” He turns to go, but Artemis stops him with a hand on his shoulder.

“Hey, listen—it was good seeing you tonight. And if you need someone to talk to…” What she really means is: it’d be nice to be around someone who’s hurting as much as I am. Not to say that the rest of the team wasn’t as torn up over Wally’s death, but she and Dick had been ground zero. Closest to the blast.

After a pause, Dick nods. “Yeah… I could use a sparring partner, actually. I’ll send you an address.”

“Okay.” Satisfied, Artemis withdraws her hand, curling her fingers into her palm.

It feels like a start.

*

Dick’s directions lead Artemis to Wayne Manor; from there he takes her to the Bat Cave.

“I thought you were striking out on your own,” Artemis says, using her forearms to deflect a kick to her face. Dick grunts and recovers, throwing a punch to her stomach; she dances out of the way.

“I am. I just pop in here from time to time because Bruce has better equipment. Plus there’s less of a chance of me disturbing the neighbors.” He gestures to the eerily blue-lit stone walls around them.

Artemis feints and goes low, ducking under Dick’s guard. Two quick hits to Dick’s sternum pushes him back, before he gets a hand on her wrist and twists her around so that her back is pressed against his chest.

“Weren’t we supposed to be talking?”

Kicking his shin, Artemis breaks free. “All right, fine. I’ll start.”  Jab.  “I keep wanting a scapegoat.”  Kick.  “Like, one person to blame, instead of something as big as the Reach. But it’s not some giant revenge thing, and I know Wally wouldn’t want me to go down that sort of all-consuming rabbit hole even if it was, and that pisses. Me. Off.” On those last words, she manages to use Dick’s momentum against him and flips him over her shoulder.

For a minute, it’s so quiet between them she can hear the faint plip of water dripping from a stalactite into the water below the sparring dais. Still lying on the floor, Dick confesses, “I keep hearing him.”

“I make a joke to myself and he’s there, in my ear, with the punchline. And then…” He passes a hand over his face.  “And then I realize that the real punchline is him being gone.”

Slowly, Artemis approaches him. She feels like she did when they were undercover at Haly’s circus so many years ago, that brief moment of hangtime before their hands connected in the air. She means to sit down next to him, pat his shoulder, she doesn’t know what, but instead Dick sweeps her legs out from under her and she goes down hard, the air whooshing out of her chest as she falls flat on her back.

“Agh!” The release sets something loose inside her. Next thing she knows, she’s yelling again, louder, just because.

Dick catches on and then it’s just the two of them shouting, their voices echoing through the cavern, threading around and piling atop each other like a flock of birds. After they’re done, Dick rolls so that they’re lying side by side.

“You know, when we were starting out—when we first became friends—I used to make fun of Wally that if he kept talking so much while running he was bound to swallow more bugs, or something. And he’d just shoot back like, ‘Nah dude, you think I’m not fast enough to see them and dodge them in the air?’ But you know how he was always so hungry after missions? One time I was so mad at him I put a bug in his sandwich. I’ve never forgotten the look on his face after he bit into it and I said, dodge that.”

“You didn’t.” Artemis gasps and covers her mouth, horrified, but she can see it so vividly: the colors draining from Wally’s face, making his freckles pop even more against his skin, the same greenish tint his cheeks took the time they went to Vietnam and he got food poisoning. He’d spent two days feverishly glaring up at the mosquito netting, and Artemis had draped cold hand towels over his forehead and promised she wasn’t going to leave him for the very obliging boy who kept bringing them ice.

“I did.” Dick is gleeful. “Really put the ‘rank’ in prank.”  

Artemis snorts; the snort turns into a full-blown guffaw. Dick turns toward her, laughing too. His hair is matted with sweat but still soft; it brushes against her forehead.

It feels so good to be close to someone again, to be able to flip on a dime from sadness to frustration to anger to laughter and not have to explain herself. She can’t remember the last time she smiled and didn’t feel guilty about it, and she means it more affectionately than anything when she reaches over and brings Dick’s mouth to hers, like if she inhales whatever they’ve temporarily managed to create here between them, it’ll be enough to tide her over for the next few months. For a second, he’s warm and responsive, before his lips stiffen and he pulls back.

“I shouldn’t have done that.”

Shouldn’t, couldn’t, wouldn’t.  Shouldn’t beat yourself up about it, shouldn’t blame yourself for getting back in the game.  Artemis is sick of people telling her how to deal, how it’s supposed to go.  It’ll get better and then it doesn’t. People talk like there are guidebooks for this kind of shit, like it’s a marathon she just needs to pace herself through. And it’s the stupidest thing, but she misses being held.

She sits up and crosses her arms, resisting the urge to curl in on herself. “You didn’t do anything. I’ll go.”

“No, Artemis, wait, I don’t think you should go, I just want to understand what’s going on—”

“I want you to touch me, okay?” she explodes. “I want you to touch me because he’s never going to again and I know you loved him too and—and maybe if it’s you, I won’t feel so desperately alone.”

Dick looks stricken, and then, hesitantly, he reaches for her. His eyes are so blue, the kind of crushed eggshell you’d use to make a paint. “You’re not alone.”

“Prove it,” she says, vision blurring with tears—wanting, needing him closer, and then his hairline is up against hers again and his nose is at her cheek, his mouth at her jaw, soft but with a willingness to bruise. Don’t ask me what we’re about to do, Artemis silently begs, and Dick doesn’t.

 *

 Wally had been a restless lover. Always turning them over, switching positions. Artemis had taken it as a challenge, part of the ongoing competition that defined their relationship. Deep down, she’d known that Wally would be just as content if the rest of their sex life consisted solely of spooning gently on Sundays, which, if anything, was why she’d been so eager to experiment—because it felt like an easy gift she could give, not something she had to master to “maintain excitement” or make him stay.

She’s not sure what she expected from Dick. Maybe that’s a comfort—that she wasn’t fantasizing before they happened, wondering about all the mechanics of how it would go. Dick lets her call the shots, lets her ride him into the ground, the grip of his fingers around her thighs the only reminder she isn’t just angling toward oblivion. When he presses his thumb between her legs, it’s a weird sort of anchor—like hearing a voice pick up on a line you thought was dead. She has a body, and here’s someone on the other end of it, caring about her release. As soon as that thought hits, the relief shudders through her; she keeps rocking long enough to feel Dick follow, a stutter and a grunt, before she collapses boneless over him, the sweat of his skin a comforting stickiness against her cheek.

Internally, she apologizes to Bruce for desecrating his training space. Then again, they’re hardly the first of the Justice League to get handsy in less than appropriate places. She’s seen how Black Canary and Green Arrow act around each other.

Below her, Dick catches his breath. The rush of blood—his or hers—is loud in her ears.

“I didn’t think you’d be so…”  Giving, she means to say, but it gets lost on her tongue. “I mean, Zatanna…” she trails off again.

If Dick’s embarrassed at the prospect of his ex-girlfriend having blabbed about the details of their sex life to Artemis, he doesn’t show it. His fingers find a snag in her hair; gently, he works it loose. The air smells hedonistic. He keeps combing. Nice is the only word she can think to describe it, and that makes her want to cry again, so she squeezes her eyes shut.

“Thank you,” she whispers against his chest.

Dick pauses his ministrations. He flattens his palm against the base of her neck and just—holds her there.

“Don’t mention it.”  

When she goes home that afternoon to shower, she runs the water on full blast for a long time.

 *

 Armed with Chinese food, she visits Dick’s place the next day intent on making amends. Dick doesn’t even act surprised; he just points to the glass coffee table where she can set the bag of chopsticks, napkins, and takeout.

“I’m trying to decide what to watch.”

There’s really no need for him to stand in front of the TV the way he does, one hand propped on his hip as he clicks through options with the remote. Artemis lets herself ogle, a bit. The surest way to blow past what happened between them yesterday is to be honest with herself, right? And as far as coping mechanisms go, Artemis could have done worse. At least her method has a gymnast’s ass.

“Any preferences?”

“Between what?” asks Artemis, cracking open the carton of lo mein and settling back against the cushions. The Netflix suggestion algorithm onscreen paints a condemning picture of Dick’s tastes. “True crime or… true crime?”

Wally had been really into nature documentaries. One time during freshman year, when they were still living on Stanford’s campus, they’d gotten high in Wally’s dorm room and watched Blue Planet. Wally had cried when the seal got flung apart by killer whales.

“I’ll Be Gone in the Dark it is, then,” says Dick. He settles next to her on the couch, peeling back one of the orders and sniffing its contents. “What’s this one?”

“Salt and pepper ribs. They were today’s special.”

“Artemis.” Dick beams. “You really do care about me.”

 *

 Ten minutes into the episode begs a single question: “Isn’t it sort of depressing that you spend so much of your day fighting crime, and then you go home to unwind and just watch… more of it?”

Dick shrugs. “It keeps me sharp. And it’s nice seeing other people solve problems.”

“Well, if you ever feel like branching out, there’s a short film about Rubik’s cubes you might like.” Artemis nudges his side. “Remember when you were a scrawny math geek?”

Bringing both hands behind his head, Dick smirks. “Still a math geek. Just not scrawny.”

Artemis stares. That was just a bit of friendly showboating, right? Or was it a flirt? Not trusting herself, she whips her gaze back toward the TV. What feels like eons later, the credits roll.

“Artemis,” Dick says, too soft for having just finished a show about murder. He taps the corner of his mouth. “You’ve got some food stuck.”

She wipes with the back of her hand; a breaded piece of orange chicken emerges as the culprit. Without thinking, she flicks it off, sending it flying somewhere onto Dick’s carpet.

“Oops.”

Chuckling, Dick shakes his head. “I need to vacuum tomorrow, anyways.”

The mention of tomorrow stirs her. “Right. I should head out.”

“Yeah.” Dick rises to help her clean up their mess, holding open the plastic bag so she can toss in the soiled napkins and other bits of trash. “Or—”

He hesitates, but the hesitation’s enough. It might as well be a hand on her wrist, with how it stops her in her tracks. All night, despite what she told herself, she’s been looking for proof: proof that his aloneness fits the shape of hers, that he needs her, too. This time, Dick makes the first move—cups her face in both hands and kisses her, slow and deep and full of heat. Some pepper from the food they ate still lingers on his lips, making her mouth tingle, and Artemis is dizzy and flat on her back on the couch before she knows it, giving in.

Not scrawny at all, she thinks, admiring the solidness of Dick’s knees on either side of her, the weight of his frame as they grind together. The sheer mechanics of it feel very horny-teenager-after-prom, but the way Dick sucks her bottom lip and swallows her breath down with it is decidedly adult.  These days, Artemis practically lives in her sports bra, which doesn’t exactly grant easy access, but when Dick’s fingertips skim over the cotton covering her breasts the sensation zings all the way down her spine.

“Need… off…”

“Yeah,” Dick murmurs, humming as he moves down the column of her neck. “Gimme a sec, I’m working on it.”

She’d worn sweats because she figured their bagginess would keep her from sparring again and any potential… situations that could arise from that. Instead, all it means is Dick unties the drawstrings easily, sliding her pants down her legs. Cool air brushes across her as he shifts positions; she wants to sob in relief. His teeth graze her hip and then catch the edge of her panties and—oh. Fuck. The moan tears out of her and she scrabbles at the armrest, hips rising of their own accord. Next time, she is handcuffing Dick to a bed, because what he’s doing with his tongue and fingers should be illegal. She can feel him grinning, the bastard, and the only thing keeping her from crushing his head to a pulp between her thighs is the maneuver he pulls where he hooks her knees over his shoulders, so he can change the angle and plunge in deeper. Artemis shoves the edge of her T-shirt into her mouth at the last minute, only barely managing to muffle her cry.

Dick surfaces from his solo mission looking entirely too satisfied, mouth glistening. Trembling, still, from her orgasm, Artemis squints at him, possessed by some combination of unbridled lust and rage.

“Dick.”

“You calling, or asking?”

“Shut up,” she hisses. She feels like a newborn foal, after what he just did to her, but the urge to dismantle him just as thoroughly sends her surging upward and pushing him back. Dick welcomes their reversed positions by peeling off his shirt and tossing it over his shoulder, all while Artemis works furiously at his belt. It shouldn’t feel so good, to hear the metal clink against his button and watch the leather slide through the loops. To see the shadows the light of the TV casts on him—the lashes on his cheeks, the hollow of his throat. Artemis hadn’t paid much attention the first time, too desperate and caught up a bit in self-loathing, but now she’s actually enjoying this, savoring the flex of Dick’s abs as he pushes up to meet her, his skin pebbling at her touch.

“I’m going to take you apart,” she purrs.

Dick groans and bucks. The sensation sends a sharp spike of pleasure through her, and she clamps down on him tighter, refusing to yield.

“Try me, Tigress,” he rasps, pushing himself up on one arm so he can mouth at her collarbone. With his other hand, he pulls off her hairtie so her hair comes free of her ponytail, and this is going to be a thing with him, isn’t it, him wanting to fuck her while her hair swings loose around her face. She indulges him for a few minutes, claws his back and bites his shoulder for good measure, but then she’s pushing him back down and stretching out her body as languidly as possible to remind him who’s boss. Their pace slows. Dick keeps a hand fisted in her hair, so he can tug her head back in order to keep her neck exposed to his wanton mouth, but his grip gets less sure the closer she pushes him to the edge.

“Art—” says Dick, the single syllable like a painting pinned to the wall, fraught with desire, and then he just lets it drop, the tresses of her hair falling through his fingers. She wants to tell him that he’s beautiful, that he does look like a boy wonder, right then, in the midst of coming undone, chest flushed and hair mussed and pupils blown nearly wide enough to overtake the blue.

She doesn’t, but she stays the night, and that’s close enough.

 *

  High-functioning, Artemis’s therapist had called her, before Artemis moved back to Gotham. And it does feel like a high—the sneaking around, the after-hours meet-ups, the back-and-forth. There’s no one really keeping tabs on her, though Artemis has plenty of cover stories if anyone asks (new intel, side reconnaissance, etcetera, etcetera). Her mom eyes her and says, “As long as you’re not planning on staging your own death again, because I will find out and I will kill you this time,” and that’s that. Artemis nearly laughs. If anything, what she’s doing is the opposite, a small resurrection. An entire month and a half passes this way: day trips and dinners and movie nights and Dick and her in a bathtub, in the shower, against a wall. She even wears a gown and heels once, not because they have an actual event to attend, but because Dick has a fantasy that involves taking her from behind in the Wayne Manor library.

They’re in his apartment on a Sunday morning bathing in the afterglow, sheets tangled around their waists. Thank god Dick is one of those assholes that splurged on not only a nice mattress but also a solid bed frame. Artemis reaches over to push the hair out of his eyes. The black tuft on the back of his head that she likes grabbing is fluffed up like a duck's tail, and under the sunlight slanting through the windows, he looks angelic.

“Are you falling back asleep?”

Yawning, Dick snags her around the waist, dragging her to him. She should not delight this much in being manhandled.

“You wore me out,” he complains, tucking his chin over her shoulder.

“They just don’t make them like they used to,” Artemis sighs. Dick growls a little at the dig, fingers tightening against her hip.

Well. If he’s going to nap, she is, too. Comfortably spooned, she snuggles back against him, prepared to drift off.

“Do you think Wally would have wanted…” Dick doesn’t finish the thought.

Artemis turns in his arms. Dick has long eyelashes, and he’s looking at her through them almost bashfully. She places a hand on his chest. Feels his heartbeat thump once, twice.

“I think he would want us to be happy.”

“Are you?” Dick’s voice fades out and he has to swallow hard to clear his throat. “Happy?”

“I’m not… miserable.” 

Dick runs his hand up her bare arm, over her shoulder. “Me neither.”

“You know, Wally and I thought…” She bites her lip, remembering a whoosh of air, Wally speeding to her side to kiss her and interrupting her report on the disabled Paris MFD.  I know we promised each other we’d get out of this game, but maybe we can have our life together and play hero, too.  “We thought we’d have everything.”

Dick’s response isn’t mournful; it’s matter-of-fact. “After my parents died, I never really convinced myself that I could have it all.”

“That sounds like something Batman would say.”

“Does it?”

“A little.”

Once upon a time, Artemis had stood before the team ready to lay bare her darkest secret, waiting to be kicked out. And Dick had shown his hand: he’d known from the beginning and hadn’t cared.  You aren’t your family. You’re one of us. She knows he’s second-guessed himself over the years, wondering how fit he actually is to play leader. But for her, trust has always been the easiest thing about the two of them. It was why she’d said yes so easily to his deep cover mission—because she knew that he wouldn’t quit until he’d brought all of them home, that he would do whatever he could to keep them safe.

Taking his face in both her hands, she looks deep into his eyes. “You deserve good things, Dick Grayson.”

“Mm.” Dick smiles into her kiss, hooks his ankle over hers. “Keep telling me that. I’ll start to believe it.”

 *

 Jade abandons Will and Lian on a Tuesday, and Artemis’s carefully crafted equilibrium falls apart. At least this time she’s not the one directly being left, unlike when she was a teenager. Her expectations of her older sister had hardly been high, but if she’d plotted them on a graph they’d have trended upward. Now they’ve tanked.

“Did she leave any hint of where she was going?” Dick asks over the whir of his juicer. He’s gotten really into squeezing oranges lately; Artemis can’t complain because he always gives her the first glass.

“It’s Jade. She never wants to be found, and I hardly think she’s about to try an  Eat Pray Love type thing.”

“Eat Slash Steal, maybe?” Dick offers, dropping two ice cubes into a drink and setting it in front of her.

Artemis sips, balling up a napkin and throwing it at him at the same time. “Watch it, that’s still my family you’re talking about.”

“I’m sorry. How’s Will taking it?”

“As well as any dad trying to raise a two-year-old by himself would.”

“So, poorly.” Dick taps his finger against the table. “Are they coming here?”

Artemis looks at him blankly. “Why?”

“I figured they might want to be closer to you and your mom now that Jade’s gone. Gotham’s not so bad—you and I turned out fine. And Will probably needs to look into preschools and a babysitter for Lian soon. If you move in with me, you can bring her over whenever.”

The last piece of information slips in so casually she thinks she’s misheard. “What?”

“If you move in with me, you can bring Lian over whenever,” repeats Dick. “This place is as good as yours. You’re over here all the time anyway.”

Suddenly, she can’t breathe. “You’re serious.”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

She can’t meet his eyes. “W—Will’s home is in Star City. He’s not going to move.”

Slowly, Dick says, “Okay. But my offer doesn’t really depend on Will.”

Her stuff is still in boxes. She’s still paying for a storage unit almost 3,000 miles away. And Dick is waiting on her so intently it makes her chest hurt.

Artemis stands up. “We’re not doing this.”

Dick’s eyebrows rise. Annoyance, or maybe anger, flickers across his face. “You wanna fill me in on what exactly it is we’re doing, according to you?”

“We’re not going to fight about this like we’re…”  In a relationship. In love. In anything other than a messy configuration started by shared grief. She doesn’t say any of it out loud, but she doesn’t need to—Dick’s always been great at reading people, and he’s known all her tells from the start.

“Right.”  The single syllable comes out as cold and pointed as an icicle. He pushes his chair back from the table and stands up. The clouds are rolling in, throwing shadows across his features. Even now, Artemis wants to kiss him, wants to be the one to smooth the furrow between his eyebrows away.

“Dick…”

“Do me a favor, will you?” Dick grabs his jacket from the hook by his door, shrugging it on. He pauses, briefly, in the doorway. “Lock my door on the way out.”  

That night, she lies alone in her bedroom next to the picture of her, Wally, and Brucely. Brucely snuffles at the foot of her bed and then leaps onto the covers, and this time she doesn’t shoo him off. Neither does she fall asleep.

 *

 There was a song Jade had liked to sing, passed down from their mother: a Vietnamese lullaby about a yellow butterfly, to the tune of “Frère Jacques.” The butterfly flies all over the sky. Come and see. Come and see. When it became clear that Artemis’s hair would grow in blond, not black, Jade started pulling it, making her giggle. You’re the yellow butterfly, see?

The taxicab she calls for the airport is bright yellow in the morning light. Plain old civilian travel for plain old civilian business. You don’t need to be a superhero to fly across the country and move in with your brother-in-law and your niece. She’ll sing silly little songs and wash Lian’s hair, and they’ll be a family same as anyone else’s: clumsy, incomplete.

“Artemis.” Dick coalesces out of the fog. They haven’t seen or spoken to each other in a week, and she should be mad that he’s here because it probably means he’s been monitoring her web traffic and caught wind she’d bought plane tickets. Still, all she feels is relief.

Jade had laughed when Artemis had let slip what she was doing during one rare sisterly bonding moment. “Oh, darling sister, your thing with your little bird boy isn’t about moving on. You’re using him as a holding pattern. Try not to damage him too much, hm?” Rankled, Artemis had hung up the phone—what did Jade know about anything, besides shoving it under the rug and pretending it didn’t matter? Now, though, Artemis sees things more clearly. Jade did know something about bodies and what they could and couldn’t fix; after all, isn’t that why she ran?

She worries with the strap of her duffel bag, letting Dick approach.

“If this were a romcom, you would have waited until I got to the airport and then run through security.”

“If this were a romcom,” says Dick, stopping in front of her and shoving his hands in his pockets, “I’d be trying to make you stay.”

She thinks he might be the one person left on this planet who knows her best. She thinks they could save each other, if they’d let themselves try. But they each have work to do on their own, first.

Setting down her bag, she tucks her face into the crook of his neck and breathes him in. Wherever else she goes, this spot will always feel like forgiveness. Nose buried in her hair, Dick squeezes her back.

The taxi driver rolls down his window. “Is this guy coming with us or not?”

Artemis pulls back, and there’s so much sky in Dick’s eyes.

“You know where to find me,” she says.

 *

 | STAR CITY

| JULY 29, 2018; 7:30 AM PST

 “Who are you here to recruit this time?” Will asks, leaning against the doorframe, but Artemis doesn’t need an answer, doesn’t need any details but the black hair she can see just over Will’s shoulder, Dick’s voice at the end of a line.

He jumps, and she jumps with him. They’ll figure out everything else as they go.

Before Dick can respond, she says: “I’m in.”