#i want to get them something as soon as possible

[guilty-pleasures21]

Great cause I've been thinking about something for days-

Jason x Reader but-

Sometimes Jason can't get home in time. It's not that he wants to take so long, but all this mess of missions and patrols and all that crap always seems to get in his way.

Still, since he loves his girl so much, Jason doesn't mind calling her just to tell her he's coming as fast as he can and ask if she's all right.

He's just in love, guys, what can he do?

By the way, he also loves to say what he's going to do with his pretty girl when he gets home as well.

- 💚

Firstly, I would like to apologise for how long this has taken: I was not ignoring you, I was just finding it really difficult to come up with enough of a storyline to write a fic out of 😅.

Secondly, I know this deviates from what you asked for, but I do hope that you still like it 🥺. I just thought it would be really funny to write Jason being all shy and flustered for a change ☺️.

NEVERTHELESS! If I have disappointed you, please don’t hesitate to drop me another message and I will do my best at another attempt! I love you, babe 🥺.

The call

Warnings: an explicit phone call and an explicit description of a handjob (m receiving).

----------------------------------------------------------

     “Hood?” X asked, her sweet voice wafting out of his communication device and filling his ears. “Are you gonna be done soon?” 

     “Hmm?” Jason hummed distractedly, keeping an eye on Penguin’s goons as they moved in and out of one of his secret warehouses. “Yeah, ba-”

     His eyes grew wide as he caught himself quickly: no one else in the batfamily knew that he and his best friend had started dating a while ago and the two of them had wanted to put off dealing with the chaos that would ensue once they found out for as long as they possibly could. Jason slid his gaze over to Dick, nervously gauging his reaction, then he cleared his throat when his brother seemed to take no notice. “Yeah, Nightingale. Their new shipment should be reaching here in eleven minutes. We plan on moving in then.” 

     “Okay, sweetheart,” X replied, her voice taking on a mischievous tone that had Jason’s core heating up with nerves. “I can’t wait for you to get home, baby. I’m gonna have you all to myself for the next week, right, Jay?” 

     Jason swallowed hard and stole another quick glance at Dick. No reaction. Jason exhaled in relief and let out another little cough before responding to his wicked girlfriend. “Right. This should deal a substantial blow to their operations. The others can help stage attacks on their other warehouses in the meantime.” 

     “Oh, is that so?” X asked, rolling over onto her stomach and getting herself comfortable on Jason’s bed. She’d always stay over at his apartment whenever he had to stay late on a mission - she didn’t like the thought of him coming home to an empty house, especially if he’d had to be physically violent with someone. She’d known about his PTSD and used to stay over at his place even before they’d started dating, comforting him when he awoke from a nightmare or coaxing him out a panic attack in the middle of the night. He’d only ever let her be privy to such vulnerable sides of him and she’d told him honestly that that was why she’d started falling in love with him. “You gonna pass the buck on to the others so you can come home and take care of your lonely little girlfriend?” 

     Jason’s breath caught in his throat at the pout he could hear in her voice. Was she at his place? She probably was, but … was she on his sofa? Relaxing in front of the television as she teased him? Or … was she … somewhere more … intimate? In something more intimate? Jason ground his teeth together, wrestling between the need to keep himself focused on the mission before him and the sudden desire to find out exactly what his ‘lonely little girlfriend’ was doing in his apartment right then. “Of course I’m wearing all my gear, Nightingale. Got to make sure we’re properly covered up before we bust in there and start taking everyone out.” 

     X bit her lip at the subtle question hidden within his words: he wanted to know what she was wearing. 

     “‘Properly covered up’?” she repeated, kicking her legs in the air behind her. “Mmm, that sounds … like the opposite of what I am right now, Jay; lying here on your bed, all spread out on your soft sheets as they caress my bare skin.” Her boyfriend sucked in a breath over the comms and X’s stomach flipped as she pictured the expression he was probably wearing right then: thick brows furrowed in confusion as he figured out how to respond, beautiful green eyes glazed over as he imagined her lying naked on his bed, sharp jawline tensing with frustration as he forced himself to pay attention to his mission. Shit, he was hot. 

     X flipped over onto her back and moaned softly as the thought of her deliciously sexy boyfriend filled her mind. “Mmm, but you know how much I love seeing you all dressed up in your Red Hood outfit. Your tight little carbon fibre suit stretched so perfectly over all your delicious muscles. Mmm, you’re so hot, Jay! I wish you were here so I could just pounce on you and trace all your sexy muscles with my tongue …” 

     A soft gasp escaped his lips at her dirty words and Jason swore his heart stopped when Dick turned to raise an eyebrow at him in question. Jason shook his head slightly, reassuring him that everything was fine and thankfully, Dick returned his attention to the warehouse. “Nine minutes.” 

     “Oooh, is that a challenge, sweetheart?” X asked, delighting in the sudden hoarseness in his voice. He was always so smooth and sexy whenever they were alone, teasing and touching and tasting every inch of her body until she was breathless with lust, unable to focus on anything but the feeling of his hands on her bare skin. But now … “There’s a reason they call it ‘seven minutes in heaven’, darling. But … I’m feeling generous tonight knowing I’m going to have you all to myself for the next week, so … I’ll finish in five … if you let me top you tonight.” 

     He let out a choked gasp at the image her words conjured up in his mind: him lying helplessly on his bed while she rode him into his mattress, her soft hair brushing the curves of her full breasts, her pearly teeth sinking into her lower lip in ecstasy, her perfect body sliding up and down on his cock at exactly the pace she wanted to go at. And unfortunately for him, Dick did take notice this time. 

     “Hood? What’s wrong?” His voice was firm as he spoke, authoritative and confident, and Jason quickly waved him away so he wouldn’t start panicking. 

     “Just a hiccup,” he lied. “I’m fine. Truck should be arriving in eight minutes.” 

     “Is Dick there?” X asked, her tone alight with mischief at the revelation that the two of them were right next to each other while she was talking dirty to him. “Has he been there the whole time?!” 

     “Yes,” Jason replied softly, lowering his voice so Dick wouldn’t grow even more suspicious by his continued conversation with a member of their team not currently involved in the mission at hand. Shit. He should just hang up, shouldn’t he? End the call now before he reached a point where he couldn’t physically hide the evidence of what his best friend was doing to him right then. Shit. Think gross thoughts, Jason, he counselled himself, like … bugs! Cockroaches, especially! Ugh! Nasty little things with their hairy legs and their spindly antennae and ugh, he was going to be sick. But at least he wasn’t getting aroused anymore - though the brief respite didn’t seem like it would last long anyway. 

     “How naughty of you, sweetheart!” X laughed, oblivious to - or most likely ignoring - her supposed-to-be-secret boyfriend’s stressful predicament right then. “Letting your girlfriend talk dirty to you with your brother standing right next to you? Mmm, I didn’t know you could be so naughty, baby.” 

     Jason clenched his fists and focused his thoughts on his breathing, trying to keep it deep and steady so his body wouldn’t get excited and start redirecting his blood towards his core. But he must have been a glutton for punishment because he just couldn’t bring himself to end the call. 

     “And- Oh my god!” X exclaimed, a realisation suddenly taking over her thoughts. “He doesn’t even know! Your brother doesn’t even know that you started dating your best friend, baby! What’s he going to think, love?! What’s he going to think when he hears your best friend saying such naughty things to you? When he hears the innocent little Nightingale saying such dirty things to her best guy friend?

     “Do you think he’s going to think I’m just practising, baby?” X asked, getting more and more thrilled by the idea of Dick finding them out via such a compromising situation. She sat up on Jason’s bed, suddenly feeling extremely hot under her pyjamas, and tugged her shirt off, tossing it aside. “Do you think he’s going to think that I’m just practising having sex with you?! Letting you touch me and tease me and taste me just so I can get to know what it feels like?” 

     She let out a low chuckle at the thought and Jason shivered as the tantalising sound travelled teasingly down his spine. And, f*ck him, now he couldn’t get the thought of her naked body out of his mind! She was just so delicious, her plush breasts, her smooth skin, her slender neck, her pert ass, her- F*ck, f*ck, f*ck, f*ck, f******ck! Cockroaches! Focus on the cockroaches! 

     “But how could anyone else ever do it for me after you, baby?” X pressed, slipping her bottoms off and crawling under the covers. “You’re so hot, Jay! With your long fingers and your rough skin and your hard muscles and argh! Oh God, Jay, your … How are you so good with your tongue?!” 

     Argh, f*ck. He could feel his pants tightening around his crotch at the sound of her shallow breaths - at the indication of her touching herself while she thought about him. But shit! Did she really find him so hot that just the thought of him was enough to get her off?! F*******ck! 

     “Hood?!” Jason startled as Dick bumped his shoulder suddenly, snatching him out of his reverie. “Hood, they’re at the intersection of Apple and Kyle.” 

     “Three minutes,” Jason recited, the words coming automatically as he glanced at the countdown in the corner of his screen. His eyes flickered over to the icon of his best friend’s face, her cute little smile pointed straight at him from the upper right corner of his screen, and he swallowed hard when it lit up as she began speaking again.

     “I’m … I’m coming, Jay!” she promised, her voice getting breathy and high-pitched as she approached her edge. “I’m gonna come for you, okay, baby? I’m … Just imagining … your long fingers inside of my p*ssy … your lips sucking my neck … your chest … Nngh! Bite me, Jay! Bite … Hngrh, shit! J-Jason! Jason! I love you, Jason! I … Oh God, you’re so hot! So … So deliciously hot, Jay … How the hell are you so frickin’ hot, Jason?! Mmm, shit.” 

     Jason panted heavily, feeling as if he’d just come down from his high as well, and studiously avoided Dick’s gaze. Thank f*cking god he had his full helmet on - he could feel the blush racing up the back of his neck and bolting across his cheeks, blatantly giving away all the naughty things his best friend had been murmuring in his ear as she’d come to the thought of him. F*******ck! He was … He was never picking up another call from her again when he was on a mission - she’d just have to ring up the watchtower if she needed any help next time. Jason reached for his watch, meaning to end the call as his countdown continued ticking down to the one minute mark now, but his girlfriend didn’t seem to be done with him just yet. 

     “Come back soon, okay, baby?” she pleaded, her tone relaxed now that she’d gotten some of the excitement out of her system. “It’s just not the same without you, Jay. I … I can’t make myself come the way you do!”

     Jason lowered his head and sighed, feeling himself about to f*cking cry with frustration at her desperate words. Could you even cry out of of f*cking desperation?! Shit, maybe she’d broken him or something. He was going to have to get back at her for it later. 

     “You just know me so well, baby,” X purred, that same wicked mischief inching its way back into her voice again. “Nobody knows me better than my best friend - nobody knows how to make me come better than my best friend does, Jay. After all, you’ve been getting so much practice, right, baby?” 

     “Shit,” Jason hissed, his defeated exhalation finally letting her know that he’d reached his limit with her. X giggled softly, but decided to ease up on him: he still had an important mission to go on, after all, and she wanted him safe and back in his bed as quickly as possible. 

     “I’ll see you later, baby. Love you, Jay!” 

     “Ngh,” Jason grunted, relieved to have control over his own thoughts again. “We’ll talk later.” He hung up the call, then glanced over at Dick, letting him know that he was ready to go. Dick nodded and pulled his escrima sticks out of their sheaths as he got into position. 

     “On my count. Ready? One, two, three!” 

     Jason tugged the collar of his shirt, already sick of the tight suit he’d been forced into for the gala Bruce was throwing that night. It was meant to be a fundraiser for some charity, but of course the rich socialites of Gotham just saw it as an opportunity to parade around their undeserving wealth. And try to land one of the billionaire Bruce Wayne’s eligible young sons if they had the chance. Jason sighed when Clara Yang’s keen gaze landed on him, picking him out as soon as she entered the hall; not that it was difficult to pick Jason out in any room given his towering height and intimidating physical build - an intimidating physical build that did not seem to deter the young heiress in the slightest. Shit. Where was his girlfriend when he needed her?!

     “Richard! Jason! How lovely to see the both of you again!” Clara greeted them cheerfully, stepping forward to place a light kiss on each of their cheeks. She tried to linger in Jason’s arms just a moment longer, but he stepped back as quickly - and obviously - as he could, firmly setting his boundaries. 

     “Nice to see you too, Clara,” Dick replied, always fitting so perfectly into the mould of Bruce Wayne’s perfect oldest son. “Have you tried the appetisers yet? We hired a Michelin star Italian chef to cater the event. He normally doesn’t do engagements outside of his restaurant but, well, who can say no to Bruce Wayne?” 

     Jason’s gut twisted with horror as Dick joined into Clara’s polite laughter. God, he thought he was going to be sick. He’d just never been able to get over the false pleasantries required of him at these events - no matter how nicely they dressed him up and smothered his personality. Clara looked to Jason expectantly, her eyes travelling appreciatively over his shoulders and chest, and Jason felt another wave of nausea pressing against his throat. 

     “I … It’s …” Dick glanced around the room as Jason fumbled his way through a response, searching desperately for some way to get his brother out of his current predicament. And thankfully, it was at that exact moment that X arrived. Dick gave a mental sigh of relief and quickly waved her over. 

     “X!” X looked up when she heard her name being called, then grinned when she saw Dick waving at her frantically. Her eyes flickered over to Jason and the young lady standing in front from him, her chestnut hair curled neatly and piled atp[ her head in an elaborate hairdo, and she chuckled when she saw the panicked expression scrawled across her best friend’s features - it looked like Clara had already begun her attack. 

     Jason turned to follow Dick’s gaze when he heard him yell for his best friend and his entire body relaxed when he found X’s dark eyes and easy smile already trained on him. He side-stepped Clara, intending on making a beeline straight for his life vest in the middle of this never-ending ocean of suffering, but he stopped short when he saw what she was wearing. 

     Her dress was off-the-shoulder, the burgundy-coloured velvet material delicately skimming the tops of her breasts before closing in around her luscious figure, hugging her beautiful curves so deliciously. A slit in one side of the dress exposed her leg to her mid-thigh, teasing him with a mouth-watering view of her tanned skin every time she took a step towards him. And she’d kept her hair down for the occasion, letting her natural dark brown curls drape elegantly over her delicate shoulders and frame her adorable little smile so perfectly. Jason opened his mouth to try greet her - to tell her how stunning she looked that night, her deep red dress highlighting all the parts of her that excited him every time his gaze landed on them - but he found himself unable to even make a sound. 

     Dick grinned when he saw the way his brother’s mouth kept opening and closing as his eyes roved over his best friend’s figure. Maybe tonight would finally be the night that they admitted their feelings to one another. Neither of them had ever mentioned anything about feeling more than friendship for the other person, but it was so obvious to anyone with eyes that they were deeply in love with one another - never mind that they both looked like they wanted to rip each other’s clothes off right then! Dick nudged Jason’s shoulder, silently encouraging him to speak up, but Jason continued to struggle with his words, so Dick stepped forward to initiate the conversation.

     “Thank god you’re here,” Dick joked, giving X a friendly pat on the back in greeting. “Between you and me, I think Jason was just about to puke all over Clara Yang’s two-thousand dollar pair of shoes!” 

     “Come now, Richard, you know how gauche it is to speak of money so blatantly,” X replied, matching his quiet tone so Clara wouldn’t hear. 

     Dick shook his head, the wide smile still stretched across his face, and took a step back from her. “I noticed that you and Jason are matching. Whose idea was that?” 

     “Obviously it was Jason’s,” X teased, sliding her hands nonchalantly up his chest. Jason sucked in a breath at the feeling, his body rapidly heating up at the way she touched him so intimately, right there in front of everyone, but X continued to focus her attention on Dick. “Didn’t you know about his secret love for fashion?” 

     “Well, if it’s a secret, then how am I supposed to know?” Dick countered quickly. X grinned at his words and finally lifted her gaze to Jason’s. He swallowed hard when he saw the way her eyes darkened when they landed on his and his hands instinctively came around her waist, holding her loosely against him.

     “X …” he began softly, his fingers cautiously inching their way along her waist. “You … You look …” She giggled softly and Jason swore his heart melted into a puddle at the sound. 

     “Thanks, Jay,” X whispered back, her voice just as gentle as his as she adjusted his bowtie and waistcoat. “You look really good too.” 

     A naughty smile took over her face as she slid her gaze over to Dick. Then she raised her voice so he’d be able to hear her next words. “Maybe even more handsome than Dick!” 

     “X!” Dick scoffed, clutching his chest in mock agony. “How could you say such a thing?!” X laughed, keeping her fingers curled around the lapels of Jason’s jacket so he could admire the slender length of her neck as her head fell back. Damn, she was beautiful. 

     “I’m kidding! I’m kidding,” X corrected quickly, trying to assuage his concerns. But she leaned closer to Jason’s chest, hiding her face behind his jacket so Dick almost missed the way her expression turned even more mischievous. “He’s definitely more handsome than you tonight, Dick.” 

     Dick let out another offended snort, but Jason barely heard it over the sound of his heart pounding in his chest at the proximity of X to him. How could she cling on to him so casually when they were in public? When anyone might glance over and see them holding each other like … like a couple? He dug his fingers into her sides as his body heated up with excitement at the thought: there was just something so satisfying about their relationship being so right that everyone else could see it even before they officially announced it out loud. And suddenly, he decided that he didn’t want to hide it anymore - he’d talk to X once they found some time to be alone and if she agreed, they’d tell his family about their relationship tonight. 

     X rubbed Jason’s chest gently as she turned to Clara, completely secure in the knowledge that he eyes for her and only her - even if she wasn’t some filthy rich, well-travelled, upper-class heiress who would never have to work for anything in her life. “Don’t you agree, Clara?” 

     Clara’s jaw tightened as her eyes followed the intimate movements of X’s fingers across Jason’s body. But she forced her lips into a tight smile, just like she’d probably been trained to do her entire life. “Why just tonight? I think Jason is always the most handsome man in the room.” 

     X almost choked on her saliva at Clara’s sugary-sweet tone. But that wasn’t even the worst reaction she could have had because poor Jason actually shuffled around in position, angling her towards Clara like she was some sort of shield that could protect him from her adamant flirtations! X swallowed down her laughter, trying to dredge up some sympathy for her boyfriend, but it was just too funny to think of the six-foot-two, built-like-a-brick-wall, not-afraid-to-kill-anyone-who-tried-to-hurt-a-child Red Hood cowering before the tiny, spoiled socialite.

     “I’m hungry,” Jason mumbled, tugging X in the direction of the buffet table on the opposite end of the room. “Let’s get some food, X.” 

     “Of course, Jay!” X agreed, flashing Clara a bright smile before running her fingers possessively through Jason’s hair. Clara clenched her fists and narrowed her eyes at her, but somehow still managed to keep that frightening smile plastered across her face. Maybe they should try recruiting her into being a vigilante too. 

     “You look beautiful, princess,” Jason finally worked up the nerve to tell her once they were alone. X smiled and rubbed his arm where she’d curled herself around him. 

     “Thanks, baby,” X replied, glowing so adorably at his praise. She really was so beautiful, so cute and pretty and all his to admire and adore. “I would kiss you, but …” She glanced around at the roomful of gossip-mongers surrounding them, then flashed him a guilty smile. Jason's stomach twisted with nerves as he remembered his decision to tell his family that night and he cleared his throat when they reached the buffet table. 

     “About that,” Jason began, his expression serious as he turned to X. She raised an eyebrow in question and Jason puffed out his chest as he straightened, trying to build up his confidence. “I was thinking-”

     “Jason Todd!” A vaguely familiar voice called from behind him. Jason turned around and for once, he grinned at who he found. 

     “Mrs Vasquez?!” he exclaimed, releasing his girlfriend for a brief moment to give the elderly woman a hug. “How have you been? I haven’t seen you in so long!” 

     X’s chest warmed at the sight of the sweet smile on her boyfriend’s face - and the reciprocating grin the kind-looking old woman wore as she returned his hug. 

     “Indeed!” Mrs Vasquez agreed. “I thought you would have visited at least once after returning from your big fancy trip in Europe!” That was the lie Bruce had had his PR team spread through the public when Jason had returned from his grave. They’d kept his death under wraps when it had happened, knowing they wouldn’t be able to explain away the sudden death of a healthy fifteen-year-old boy under the care of the lonely billionaire Bruce Wayne, so no one had batted an eye when Jason had ‘returned from studying abroad in Europe’ after a few years. 

     “But I do hope you enjoyed yourself, at least,” Mrs Vasquez finished, waving away any excuses before Jason could come up with them. Jason flashed her a grateful smile and slid his arm back around X when he straightened.

     “It was … an experience,” he admitted ambiguously, exchanging a knowing look with X. “But I’m just glad to be home.” He squeezed his girlfriend into his side and breathed in the sweet and fruity scent of her shampoo as he rested his cheek on her head. Mrs Vasquez’s gaze flickered between them knowingly and she fixed Jason with an expectant look as she waited for an explanation. 

     “Oh! Uh, X, this is Mrs Vasquez,” Jason introduced her. “She used to slip me a packet of sweets every time Bruce dragged me to one of these things.” Mrs Vasquez grabbed Jason’s forearm to steady herself as she laughed at the memory. 

     “Oh! Poor Brucie was always so confused when you left the event even more energetic than when you entered!” she recalled, giving Jason a fond pat on the arm. Then she turned to X and held out a hand in greeting. “Lovely to meet you, dear.” 

     “It’s wonderful to meet you too, Mrs Vasquez,” X agreed. “I’ve never seen Jason smile at one of these things! Maybe I should keep a pack of sweets handy every time we go to one.” She turned to Jason with a naughty glint in her eye and his features relaxed even further when he met her gaze. 

     “Hmm, maybe next time you could bring a bit of home to Europe, Jason?” Mrs Vasquez suggested, a knowing look on her face as she glanced between Jason and X. “On a honeymoon, perhaps? I'm sure your beautiful girlfriend would love for you to bring her on a tour of Europe, isn't that right, dear?”

     Jason's heart stopped at the word ‘honeymoon’. He'd just never thought that far ahead - it was a little hard to make plans for the future when you felt like you had Death chasing at your heels every day. He glanced over at X, terrified to see her reaction … but her features were lit up with a rosy glow, her lips stretched into a happy smile.

     “That would be lovely, Jason,” X agreed, tilting her head back to smile up at him. Then she leaned forward to exchange a conspiratorial look with Mrs Vasquez. “Though I'm not sure we'd be doing much sightseeing if we were to go there on our honeymoon.”

     The old woman burst into laughter and gave X a chiding tap on the arm. Then she turned to wag her finger at Jason. “I like her. I'll be waiting for my wedding invitation soon!” 

     Jason smiled dazedly, barely hearing anything after X's words. He didn't know whether his heart was pounding in his chest with nerves … or fluttering happily with excitement. Had she thought about marriage? Did she want them to be married someday? Living in their own little house with their own little kids … Jason gulped, then startled when he felt his girlfriend's fingers on his cheek, tugging his face towards hers. 

     “Jay?” she asked softly, letting her hand fall back to his chest. “Do you want to go somewhere private?” 

     Jason swallowed hard at the naughty look on her face - at the feeling of her fingers tickling him teasingly through his shirt - and nodded. X didn't hesitate before turning around and pulling him through the crowd, weaving in and out of disinterested guests as she led him away from the hall. Finally, she reached the door to Bruce's in-home gym and pushed Jason inside before closing it behind her. 

     “X!” Jason exclaimed, stumbling along behind her as she dragged him to a corner of the room. “What are you- Oof!” He let out a soft grunt as she pulled him against her, trapping herself between him and the wall. X slid her gaze over to the door, a devious smile on her lips, then she stretched onto her toes and wrapped her arms around his neck. 

     “Who's gonna visit the gym during a gala?” she pointed out, sliding her fingers up the back of his neck and into his hair. Her nails tickled his scalp gently and Jason found himself suddenly incapable of forming any rational thoughts. 

     She smirked when she saw his eyelids flutter shut as she ran her fingers through his hair. Then she let her gaze travel down his neck to his broad shoulders, his muscles accentuated so nicely by his form-fitting suit. The Wayne's would always invite her to any gala they went to - not least because her presence kept Jason calm and relaxed - and though she knew Jason hated events like this, she loved getting to dress up in all the beautiful outfits Bruce would get for her on Jason's behalf. She didn't come from a rich family and Jason wasn't one to flaunt the money Bruce would deposit in his bank account every month, so Bruce would always just tell her to send him the bill for whatever she'd rent for one of the fancy events they'd invite her to. He'd told her she could just buy the outfits, but she really had nothing else to wear them to besides the charity galas the rich and wealthy liked to throw. X let her fingers drift down to the lapels of Jason's jacket, the black lining contrasting so perfectly with the deep-red fabric that was ironically reminiscent of his Red Hood costume. And besides, why would she ever pass up on the opportunity to see her boyfriend - her best friend and the love of her life - so handsomely dressed up in his gorgeous suits?! 

     Jason swallowed hard at the way his girlfriend's eyes darkened as they travelled over his body. He'd never known how naughty she could be until they started dating - sneaking into his warehouse in her tight little vigilante costume to tease him with her curves, pulling him into an inconspicuous alcove to have a quick makeout session with him when they were supposed to be on patrol, and, shit, that call the other night? God, he was going to lose his mind if they had to keep sneaking around like this for any longer. 

     “X,” Jason murmured, his breath grazing her lips as he bent over her. His girlfriend shivered in his arms at the gravelly sound of his voice and Jason sucked in a breath as his core tightened with excitement. 

     God, she loved how soft and gentle he always was with her, his low voice, his tender touch, that boyish smile that would always take over his rugged features when they played with each other in bed. Shit, she loved him. She stretched up and closed the distance between them, letting out a soft moan when their lips touched. Jason smiled against her lips and X clung onto his neck again as her knees went weak at the feeling. 

     He wrapped one arm all the way around her, keeping her upright against him as he leaned his other hand on the wall. Shit, her dress was soft. He was going to take his time peeling it off her later, carefully exposing each inch of her smooth skin to him inch by precious inch. Jason lowered his mouth to her neck and let his hand fall down to the slit of her dress as he began pressing lingering kisses to her skin. His girlfriend let out a choked gasp as he dug his fingers into the bare skin of her thigh, and Jason felt his stomach flip at the sound. He'd always known that she loved him - she took such good care of him, after all, consistently planning her days to incorporate him into her daily schedule - but shit, he'd never known how much his best friend could have wanted him as well. Wanted his baggage, the trauma that had ingrained itself into his personality, the scars, the pain, the anger, all of it - she didn't just love all of him; she wanted it all as well. 

     She hooked her leg around his waist and pulled him closer to her, losing herself in the dizzying feeling of him all around her. Jason slid his hand higher up her thigh, his fingers sneaking beneath the hem of her dress, and X held her breath as he neared her centre. 

     “Jay!” she gasped when his thumb snuck beneath the waistband of her underwear, kneading her pelvic joint so she began dripping with anticipation. Her boyfriend chuckled into the crook of her neck, knowing exactly what he was doing to her, and another shiver danced its way down X's spine. 

     “You're so naughty, princess,” he murmured against her skin, his lips travelling slowly across the bare expanse of her shoulder, “dragging me in here so no one can see.” 

     X  felt herself melt in his arms as her boyfriend licked his way back up her neck, his teeth gently grazing her skin before clamping down on her earlobe. “Or did you want someone to catch us? My naughty little nightingale?”

     A helpless whimper fell from her mouth as he curled his fingers around her ass and Jason let out a muttered curse as her hips bucked forward, desperately seeking her boyfriend's warm centre. 

     “J-Jay …” X whined, her eyes so round and beautiful as she gazed up at him pleadingly. Jason swallowed hard at the adoring look on her face and her lips immediately flicked up into a smirk. 

     “Maybe …” X began thoughtfully, running her hands down his chest and straightening to press her lips to the base of his throat. Jason held his breath as his entire body tightened in anticipation, the adrenaline and testosterone flooding his veins at the feeling of his girlfriend's fingers inching dangerously closer to the part of his body that wanted her the most. “Maybe I just wanted to help my boyfriend relax a little?”

     And now it was his turn to shiver at the way her warm breath grazed his neck as her lips moved against his skin teasingly. X snickered softly against his throat, then tilted her head and pressed an open-mouthed kiss to the same spot. Jason closed his eyes, relaxing into the feeling of her gentle touches … but suddenly, his belt was unbuckled and his zip was undone and his girlfriend’s hand was in his pants, palming his length teasingly. “X …”

     She giggled softly at the undercurrent of warning in his voice and Jason cursed again before shifting them around slightly, shielding her from the view of anyone who decided to walk through the door at such an inopportune moment. X snickered at the way he didn’t stop her - at the way he just let her continue to arouse him right where anyone could find them! - and curled her fingers around his shaft to start tugging on him gently. “I know how stressed you get at these things, baby. Are you feeling more relaxed now?” 

     Jason let out a low groan in response, doubling over so his soft hair was grazing her forehead, and X grinned before cupping his cheek in her free hand to angle his mouth towards hers. Shit, he was a good kisser! He hadn’t been at first, a little eager and over excited to stick his tongue in her mouth and lick up the taste of her. But with a little patience - and a lot of practise 😉 - he’d become so good at it that just the feeling of his tongue running across her lips was enough to make her weak in the knees! X sighed softly as Jason kneaded her tongue with his, both his hands wandering across her body, leisurely making their way back down to her ass … 

     “Holy f*cking God!” X snatched her hand out of Jason’s pants when she heard Tim’s horrified voice echo through the room. “What the f*ck are the two of you doing?!” 

     Jason took a step back from his best friend and quickly tucked himself back into his underwear before zipping his pants back up. His heart pounded rapidly in his chest as he twisted his head back to catch a glimpse of Tim and Cass standing at the other end of the room, equal expressions of shock on their faces. “What … What the hell are you doing here?!” 

     X ignored the panicked thudding of her heart as she straightened her dress and plastered an innocent smile onto her face. She avoided Jason’s gaze as she stepped out from behind him, keeping her eyes trained on Tim and Cass instead. “We were just taking a break from the rest of the party. What are you guys doing here?” 

     Tim stared at the two of them in silence, his jaw hanging open with shock as his brain worked overtime to process what he’d just caught them in the middle of. He’d have to wash his eyes with bleach or something later tonight. And probably his brain too. And his ears, so he wouldn’t forever be haunted by the sound of X’s playful giggles and Jason’s low and teasing voice and ugh, he was going to be sick! 

     “Dick sent us to come find you,” Cass explained, confused by the scene in front of her. “He said he thought he’d seen the two of you come this way a while back ... X, why is Jason wearing the same lipstick as you?” She tilted her in question, still not catching on to what they’d been doing, and her eyes fell to the red lip-shaped stain at the base of Jason’s throat. 

     “And he got some on his neck … Oh!” She gasped, suddenly realising how all the lipstick marks had gotten on Jason’s body, and lowered her head as a blush crept up her cheeks. 

     “Guys? What’s-?” Dick stopped short as he entered the gym, utterly bewildered by the sight before him: Tim on his knees on the ground, a traumatised look on his face, and Cass shifting awkwardly in position as she looked everywhere but at Jason and X. “Uh, what’s going on?” 

     X and Jason exchanged embarrassed looks as they tried to figure out how to respond, but before either of them could say anything, Tim replied for them. “They were f*cking having sex in the gym! Oh God. Did you guys touch anything?! Oh God, are there bodily fluids everywhere?! F*ck! I’m gonna … I can’t step foot in here ever again!” 

     He pushed himself to his feet and wobbled to the door, genuinely looking like he was about to throw up any second. Dick raised an eyebrow in concern as he moved to let him pass, then he folded his arms across his chest and turned to Jason and X for an explanation. 

     “I … We … Um, that’s …” The two of them stuttered, stumbling over their words as they tried to come up with an answer. 

     “Are you guys together?” Dick suggested, trying to stop his lips from curling at the ends with joy. Jason and X clasped their hands behind their backs, both of them wearing equally guilty expressions as they avoided Dick’s gaze. 

     “Um, uh, yes, actually …” Jason confirmed, causing a rush of victory to shoot through Dick’s chest. 

     “Um, for, um, about two months? Maybe?” X elaborated, making the whole situation even better! How the hell had they managed to sneak around for two months without anyone else finding out! This was so, so good! 

     “Two months?!” Tim exclaimed, still hovering in the doorway. “Oh, shit. Please don’t tell me … You haven’t had sex anywhere else, have you?” 

     X squeezed her legs together as her body grew excited at the mention of everyone knowing how intimate she’d been with her best friend and she kept her gaze fixed on the ground so they wouldn’t see the furious blush filling up her cheeks.

     Jason stared at a corner of the ceiling and clenched his fists as he tried desperately to stop himself from snorting at the question: obviously, they’d had sex before - multiple times, in fact, both at her place and his. Thankfully though, his older brother intervened on Jason’s behalf before something completely inappropriate for the situation could slip out of his mouth. 

     “I seriously doubt this would be their first time, Tim,” Dick pointed out, his features curled into a knowing smirk. Tim gagged at the realisation that he was right, then he spun on his heel and raced out of the room, unable to take it any longer. Cass followed suit not longer after, flashing X a sheepish smile before she returned to the gala as well. Dick returned his attention to Jason and X, the three of them were left alone in the room now, and fixed them both with a smug grin. “Look, as happy as I am for the two of you, let’s try to keep it PG when there are other people around, okay?” 

     Jason rolled his eyes at his brother’s condescending tone, but didn’t look up, honestly a little embarrassed to have been caught with his girlfriend’s fingers curled so deliciously around his cock - but at least they wouldn’t have to keep their relationship a secret any longer. He turned to his girlfriend as she curled her body around his arm, her expression shy as she nodded in agreement to Dick’s suggestion, and Jason felt his stomach flip at the way she bit her lip nervously. Dick gestured to the door, not trusting the two of them to be left alone, and Jason escorted his girlfriend back into the gala. 

     “So,” X began softly, clearing his throat before sneaking a glance up at Jason. “Does this mean I can kiss you in front of Clara now?” 

     A snicker fell from Jason’s lips before he could catch it and X’s expression turned mischievous. Jason glanced around, trying to catch sight of her and quickly spotted her chatting Bruce’s ear off by a corner of the room. “I think her head might explode if you did that.” 

     X tugged on his arm, stopping him in his tracks, then cupped his cheek in her hand, turning him to face her. “All the more reason to do it!” 

     Jason slid his gaze over to the side, waiting until Clara had turned to them, her eyes alight with devilish glee, then he turned back to his girlfriend and touched his lips softly to hers. 

     “See?” X told him when a loud gasp sounded from across the room. “I told you these things weren’t so bad.” 

     Jason chuckled softly and pulled her into his chest for a hug, bending over again to press his lips to the top of her head. 

     “Only because you’re here,” he argued, too delighted to be wrapped up in his girlfriend’s arms in public to bother about who was watching them. X laughed and ran her fingers through his hair. 

     “I’ll always be here for you, Jay,” she reassured him, pressing a kiss to the side of his head before pulling back. “I love you, darling.” 

     “I love you too, sweetheart.”

[cheyisagirlkisser]

nsfw. ellie fingers you on patrol to help with your cramps. 1.4k words.

Never in your three years of residency in Jackson would you ever predict this–Ellie’s fingers deep inside of you, stroking the soft, sweet spot swollen by your own arousal. You would never have been able to predict actually crying out for her touch, hips bucking up to meet her palm like it was nothing. It was truly everything, because this was never supposed to happen.

You and Ellie had a strong distaste for each other from the start.

You liked to go to parties and drink, be reckless during patrols, and (at least attempt to) sleep with anyone who you thought was even slightly fuckable. Ellie was a wallflower, so maybe her distaste for you was plain jealousy. For you, your dislike for Ellie was much more than just something solvable with a little chat.You really resented her, and maybe it was because she actually made you feel things.

It was just another patrol like the rest, Ellie being quiet around you, and you refusing to make your usual conversation. Ellie was the only person you didn’t chat up a storm with when it came to these long patrol shifts, this one even lasting two days and requiring a camp set-up. If the two of you had really thought it through, you would’ve been more careful. Two people who have that obvious and yet annoyingly oblivious tension? It should’ve been predictable.

It started with the growing of blood in your underwear. The perfect time to be on your period, huh? You only let out a little huff to which Ellie ignored, setting off into the forest to put on a pad. When you returned, it was like fate that hit you, much like a lightning strike. Literally a strike of pain in your lower stomach signifying cramps to come, and on the one patrol you before to bring a bottle of Ibuprofen on.

You laid in your sleeping bag in pain, not wanting to even complain to Ellie, as much as you were the whining type. It’d be real nice to have someone to listen to you express how badly this cycle was, how your body was doing you dirty. You weren’t expecting Ellie to speak to you first.

“You okay over there?” not the usual irritated tone she liked to use with you, but not the most empathetic. Just slightly softer, but that was a mercy due to the strain in your relationship.

“Cramps.”

“Just take an ibuprofen and lay on your side.”

“Gee, thanks. I would’ve never thought to do that,” you bit, making Ellie glare. “I don’t have anything on me. I forgot I was close to my period.”

“Damn,” a not so sympathetic, and possibly indifferent curse from her.

“Yeah, damn is right. I feel like I’m being stabbed in my uterus repeatedly.” 

Silence went on for a few more minutes, but it was visually obvious that you were in a lot of pain. Despite her dislike for you, she didn’t like seeing you suffer. There was a small flutter of empathy deep inside her that made her suggest something she probably shouldn’t have.

“Physical stuff can help cramps, you know.” Quiet, and yet the implication was clear.

“You mean like..sex?”

“Don’t think of it as actual sex, obviously. Just me helping you.”

“If we do this, we aren’t having sex. I’m not moaning for you or telling you how much I want you, so don’t expect that shit. You’re simply giving me an orgasm, and then it’s done.”

“Agreed. No kissing, and as soon as you..finish, we stop.”

And it started just like that, as sexual act of non-sex.

Ellie didn’t warm you up with neck kisses or sloppy love bites like your usual partners did, and partially, you were glad. This was just supposed to be an orgasm, and you didn’t need to like each other to appreciate a good orgasm, right? A simple pain reliever. Anytime your brain would bleed with thoughts of Ellie doing those things for you, however, you’d block them out as soon as they entered into your mind. The imagery was more difficult to get out of your head, though. Just simply picturing her plush lips trailing over your neck, breath ghosting over…

You snapped out of it, and just focused on trying to cum so that this would end, and you and Ellie could go back to hating each other.

One finger slipped inside of you, and you bit back a gasp. You were wet enough to take it without much at all, and you hoped Ellie just assumed that was just because of your period and not actually because you were turned on.

Ellie started out slow, just rubbing your g-spot with her finger, providing some direct stimulation. It made you realize how different the act of sex itself was from sex with all of the other stuff. The teasing, how your typical couple would build up the moment to make it the best possible experience. That wasn’t what this was, though. So, why were you biting your lip to stifle moans when Ellie slipped in another finger into your increasingly wet hole, and even padded over your clit with her thumb?

Your head was spinning, and you were starting to lose your focus on just having that orgasm, the aid to your cramping. You were already too distracted to think about the pain, too focused on trying your hardest to pretend like Ellie’s calloused fingers curling into your pussy wasn’t the hottest thing you’ve felt in a while. 

Ellie didn’t complain when you instinctively bucked your hips up into her touch, and she had to try really hard not to lean down and kiss you when the occasional moan slipped past your lips. She couldn’t blame you, it was a natural reaction.

So, why was it that you were now begging for more when she curled right up into your sweet, tender spot?

“Ellie,” you breathed out, eyes fluttering open to meet hers. The scrunch of her nose that was usually present when you were around faded away, and her eyes were lidded, her lips parted slightly. A delicious, rosy tint set across her freckled face.

“Is it helping?”

“Please. Please, fuck me..just like that, I need it,” you begged, making her stomach do summersaults. It couldn’t be helped, though. Ellie took note that you shed off a little bit of your dignity when she slid her fingers slightly out and shoved them back into your hole, just to slam into your g-spot. She liked the way you sounded, the way your usual walls built around her crumbled when she fucked you good. Even though she didn’t (or at least tried not to) care to observe you enough, she noticed that you were different when at parties dancing with random people, more inauthentic. Something was ironically beautiful about the rawness to your voice that hit hard when she did something particularly mind-blowing to your pussy.

A mix of blood and your juices were dripping down her knuckles, and she really wanted to taste you. It would probably be something she would regret later, but Ellie decided to sate herself with a soft kiss to your lips instead. She felt warm and tasted like the rations from earlier, but you kissed her back fervently. The needy sounds coming from your throat were swallowed by her own mouth.

The orgasm that hit you was mind-blowing enough to aid with the cramps, but that wasn’t what you were focused on. Instead, it was the way Ellie’s tongue coaxed your lips apart, and the scent of her hair against your nose when she buried her face into your neck to taste your pulse. You felt every tremor run through you like lightning, and it was unlike anything anyone else could give you. It wasn’t forced, and the passion there was real. You actually felt something with her. 

As you came down however, the moment dissolved into awkward silence and the careful removal of Ellie’s fingers from you. You swallowed, holding back your words. You wished to forget it all now, not because you wanted to deny it ever happened, but you were scared of what it meant if you got attached to someone in Jackson.

Just like that, it was over, and you and Ellie didn’t go quite back into disliking each other dynamic but rather an awkward limbo. You left that patrol and spent the next few weeks sleeping with people, pulling all-nighters trying to make yourself feel what you did on that patrol, but you never could find the same peak in every single category of feelings that Ellie gave you.

[celestiamour]

‧₊˚✧ ❛[ me & my husband ]❜

ft. the salesman (gong ji-cheol) x f! reader — squid game

╰₊✧ you don’t need your husband to be perfect, you just want him to be honest┊3.3k words

contains: written before s2 came out!! probably ooc or inaccurate, angst with spots of fluff & a bittersweet ending? reader’s pov mostly, suspicions of cheating, lack of communication, mentioned age gap, random inaccurate lore for the salesman

➤ author's note: yeah, i saw the sudden uptick in notes on that gong yoo post i made and realized season 2 came out which i completely forgot about. i intend to watch it soon as possible and write fics for it as well as (probably) add new characters to my writing list, but for now, please be content with this!!

₊˚ʚ 💌₊˚✧ this fic was heavily inspired by “emotionally intoxicated” by aurasaurora!

gong ji-cheol is the poster image for the ideal husband. he’s always been like that from the moment you met him, and you can’t help but feel like you’re the luckiest woman in the world when he calls himself yours. he’s tall and handsome, someone who catches everyone’s eye despite his only being focused on you. he’s wealthy and hard-working, able to call a luxurious mansion your home, and willing to buy you anything your heart desires as long as you ask for it. he spoils you rotten with that money, gifting you expensive things even if you didn’t ask if it reminded him of you. he’s doting, always sure to smother you in affection with kisses and cuddles whenever together to make it known how much he adores you. the sex is great too, he makes you feel wanted and desirable without ever leaving you unsatisfied. 

most importantly though, you love him, and he loves you. the last two years of marriage have been so blissful, and there isn’t a single thing you would change.

at least that’s what you believe most of the time.

you like to think you know a lot about him, and in a way, you do. you know his favorite color, how he likes his coffee, what he usually orders at restaurants, the type of wine he prefers over beer, the exaggerated shocked fasces he likes to make, how his favorite chore is folding the laundry, how his least favorite is doing the dishes because he doesn’t like getting his hands dirty, the name of his childhood pet, what positions he likes to cuddle or fuck in, the names he’s thinking of giving to your child when they are finally born— there are so many little details you know about him, yet at times you feel like you don't know anything at all.

you don’t really know much about his childhood aside from a few random stories, he claims there’s nothing really notable and that it was as standard as can be. you don’t know who his parents were or what they were like because he said they died when he was young, but surely that’s an important loss which must have impacted him and made youth difficult in some way? you don’t know about his past partners if he even had any, but you doubt you were his first as he was yours with a face like his. you don’t know any of his secrets, like an embarrassing moment or something sinful he might have committed in the past. 

he knew all of these things about you and the little details of your life, so why don’t you know any of the most basic things regarding your own husband?

these periods of uncertainty are few and far, but once the icy tendrils of doubt creep in, it’s difficult to shake them off when you realize you only know these things through observations and not him actually telling you. it’s a miracle your stupidity allowed you to make it this far in falling head over heels for him, getting married, and carrying his child (not that you completely regret it, you still love him, but you wish you had given it more time).

they say there are no such things as stupid questions, yet the main question you have is exactly that as it’s something every wife should know even before the marriage. it would be impressive how long you’ve been clueless about this matter if it weren’t for how often and how skilled he is in managing to evade your curiosity and steer the conversation elsewhere. you didn’t want to press on it since he seems to shut it down every time the topic is brought up and you don’t want to fight over something you technically didn’t need to know, but it weighs on you and presses into your chest with the knowledge you were being kept in the dark. 

what did your husband do for a living, exactly?

his schedule is always unpredictably changing with little rhyme or reason and it confuses you. sometimes you’ll go an entire few days without seeing him, sensing him wake up in the morning before the sun is even up, feeling him kiss you on the cheek before getting ready, and not coming back until long after you fall asleep with no communication aside from a note on the table telling you he’ll be gone for the day along with a wad of cash for you to treat yourself while he’s gone. other times he’ll be chilling at home for an entire week, waking you up with aggressive cuddles (or morning sex), making you breakfast with the morning news on in the background, and taking you out to wherever you want to go on his card in his rare casual clothing and messy wavy hair rather than the typical fancy suits and hair styled with gel. 

as far as you’re concerned, he’s a businessman of sorts, although you don’t know what company he works for or what position he has in terms of hierarchy or how an occupation of that type allows such flexibility in hours or anything at all. 

“what if he’s having an affair?”

you paused for a second before continuing the motion of slicing the cheesecake with a fork and savoring the taste in your mouth. “that’s ridiculous,” you stated simply after swallowing. “he loves me very much, and it doesn’t explain his weird schedule either.”

today was spent with some friends you met back in high school, but honestly, you were only attending out of politeness and tradition since you honestly feel like you’ve disconnected from these girls long before the current. still, you treasure the memories shared in your more formative years and wouldn’t ever say no to them if they wanted to hang out like old times. ji-cheol doesn’t bother to hide his distaste for them, calling them a miserable lot who try to drag you down at every opportunity out of jealousy for your happiness. you laugh it off, but you know deep down he’s right and yet you’re still sitting here at the cafe with them with bright smiles like their words don’t cut deep. 

“maybe he’s dating the boss— a sexy office siren type— she gives him plenty of days off and he stays with her at her beach house at jeju island or something to keep her company, and then she gives him lots of money in exchange.”

“oh my god, could you imagine?”

“can you be realistic? it sounds like you’re just writing a plot for a new drama,” you giggled, not allowing the feeling of a twisting blade in your abdomen to show on your face or the venom to drip from your words at the mere thought of the man you loved being stolen away a faceless woman who was everything you wished you were more of: more beautiful, more wealthy, more experienced, more intelligent—

“you don’t know because he’s your first love or whatever— and you’re so lucky to have been able to marry him— but men are dogs, and i don’t see why he would be the exception.”

“but he treats me so well—”

“maybe he only treats you well because you’re pregnant— he probably just feels guilty. i mean, when i was pregnant and had my first, my husband wasn’t attracted to me anymore and demanded a divorce unless i lost the baby weight.” she shrugged like it was so simple, so common, like the notion of marriage wasn’t something so deeply important and could be thrown away so easily.

“we aren’t suggesting you get a divorce, but we’re just saying you should keep an eye on him— you know? a handsome guy like him was always bound to get a lot of attention…” her laugh was shrill and high-pitched, making goosebumps erupt on your skin.

“right… thanks guys…”

that night, you couldn’t stop twisting and turning on the large sectional couch with thoughts rushing through your head of your husband with some other woman. the jealousy from these fictional scenarios without evidence of existence plagued you. it made you want to vomit up the negative feelings and go back to the person you were a few hours ago without the images of him cheating planted in your mind, which didn’t go unnoticed by him and caused him to ask what was bothering you as it wouldn't be good for the baby.

you hesitated for a moment, “could you tell me about your exes?”

“why are you suddenly curious about that?” he chuckled, knowing damn well that it was because of those stupid snakes masquerading as people (it truly takes one to know one) running their mouths again, but still feigning obliviousness for your sake. 

“just wondering,” you muttered. “i mean, you’re the first person i’ve fallen in love with, but you’re a bit older than me so…”

“and i hope to be the only one too,” he smirked confidently, making you laugh as he plopped down on the ground and rested his head on the cushion next to yours. 

it was such a casual setting in such a vast space, bringing you back to the days in your little apartment inviting him over for chicken and beer before you knew about your immense wealth and got embarrassed over your cheap dates when he was so used to expensive restaurants. he found it very endearing though, knowing you liked him for him and not his money.

“well, if you’re so curious…” he trailed off, but you weren’t quite sure if it was because of hesitation or because he simply didn’t know where to start. you can’t remember the last time a conversation like this was held to learn more about him since it was usually about you, maybe back when you first started dating and briefly discussed his late parents.

he started with his crush when he was in middle school since that was his earliest recollection of feeling love, who didn’t really count as a girlfriend or love because nothing was established and because of their age, but she was his first kiss that he ran away from right after because of how nervous he was, and it was never addressed again. apparently it was his second girlfriend who taught him everything he knew before he met you, saying she basically “trained him like a dog” to create a gentleman out of an inexperienced boy who still wasn’t quite sure how to treat a woman like a queen. she was a bit mean though, and he didn’t realize he dodged a bullet until later after realizing she was unnecessarily cruel to him for no reason multiple times if he didn’t do things exactly her way.

you suppose you always knew your husband wasn’t always the suave charmer you know him to be, but the image of younger him being clueless on matters of romance made you burst out laughing because of how you could hardly picture it.

he reached over to pinch your cheek affectionately, “are you of all people really making fun of me when you were too scared to hold my hand for me to escort you out of my car?”

“oh my god, that was on our first date, i can’t be blamed! i was shaking like crazy on that day— you had to tell me that you didn’t bite.”

“i was actually thinking about calling off our date last minute because of an emergency at work,” he confessed, “but i’m glad i didn’t and met the love of my life instead.”

“aw, you flirt.” the memory made you smile and feel all giggly inside, all the fears you had about him possibly having an affair falling away, yet there were still some lingering at the back of your mind with the mention of his job. “what happened at work?”

“nothing that important,” he said instantly like clockwork. “just some boring business things.”

you didn’t push it, not wanting to ruin the mood, but once again, your curiosity was just itching to ask more questions about his work life even if it was truly as boring as he says. you wanted to know every mundane detail whether it was what his office looked like or what the annoying co-worker did on a daily basis, anything to satiate your need to know more about this mysterious man you had made life-long vows with.

it all came to a head one night while you were cooking dinner, you heard the doorbell ring a dozen times in quick succession and answered it to find an older man with fiery red hair that seemed to match his temper. when he addressed your husband by name and verified your relationship with him, he began spewing all kinds of insults about the blood he had on his hands by luring innocent people to their deaths and you felt your heart drop. you tried to reason with him that there must have been some sort of mistake, barely able to get your words out in a fit of confusion and surprise at the absurd accusation, but he wouldn’t hear you out and pointed a finger in your face, asking if you had any idea what gong ji-cheol was doing behind your back. 

at that very moment, he was suddenly seized by two anonymous men in all black, causing him to yell out in panic as they dragged him away and stuffed him in the back of a car before quickly driving off into the night without a trace. it all happened so fast, you just stood there with your mouth open in shock, wondering if you should call the police on what looked like an abduction. 

then your husband comes running up the steps with his locked briefcase in hand, shouting out your name, asking you if you’re okay, pulling you back inside the comfort of your shared home, and checking you all over to make sure you aren’t harmed in any way. when you ask about who that man was and what he was talking about, he simply told you he was some crazy customer who was dissatisfied with the company, was looking for someone to blame, and promised to tell you the details later. 

you didn’t tell him that you didn’t believe him, just pursed your lips and furrowed your brow for a second then let go of the topic like you always do, taking his coat off his shoulders with a peck on the lips asking how his day was. he reciprocated the kiss, said it was fine without anything special, and that he would shower before having dinner, something he didn’t really need to say since you already knew but stated anyway as per evening routine. 

as he headed up the stairs and disappeared from sight, you stared at the locked briefcase resting crookedly on the little entryway table and paused for a moment. if you did this, it would be a breach of privacy and a sign of growing distrust in your husband, but it could also answer all of the questions that never cease. 

your hands wouldn’t stop shaking involuntarily as you felt the cold black metal underneath your fingertips, marveling at the smooth material clean of any scratches or dents. fidgeting with the built-in combination lock, six number sequences started rushing through your mind as you started to hastily run through your options with a focus on dates. you were determined to only do this three times since you had no idea if an alarm would be set off or if it would close off permanently.

his birthday?

an electronic beep went off indicating you were incorrect, making you nervous.

your birthday?

wrong again, you only had one attempt left. you swallowed, shaking the accumulating sweat off your hands.

the date of your wedding?

you gasped as the locks suddenly flipped open and lightly knocked against the briefcase. it was undone, you could open it at any moment now and see it all.

and yet you still hesitated during this golden opportunity. was it the fact that the passcode to his most secret possession was the day you got married? was it guilt for going behind your husband’s back for answers instead of directly asking him? was it because you were afraid of what you would find if you discovered the red-haired man was telling the truth?

whatever it was, you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding and locked it again, leaving it looking untouched and went back to playing dinner.

there was a heavy tension present at the dinner table that night, the only conversation present being him interrogating you about what the red-haired man talked about word-for-word. not really interrogating since his tone of voice was still calm and gentle as he asked questions, but you could see him fidgeting with his fork and not leaving much room for any other topic until he was sure you told him everything. he then sighed and claimed the man was insane, a gambling addict who was too deep in debt to afford treatment and was trying to drag him into his misery after meeting at the subway station. 

“ji-cheol?”

he froze for a second, not used to hearing you use his real name rather than a pet name. “yes?”

“what do you do for a living, exactly?”

a pause, you watched him fidget with his chopsticks and shift the grains of rice around. “you know, business stuff— nothing you need to concern yourself about—“

“but i don’t know! that’s the thing!” you felt tears starting to well up behind your eyes, letting two years of frustration trickle through. “i know it doesn’t seem that important for me to know, but is it really so important that you leave me in the dark about it for the three years we’ve been lovers? and now some guy comes to our doorstep and tells me about how your job is playing games with people at the subway station to make them participate in death games?!” you took a deep breath, calming yourself down, “please, be honest with me, that’s all i want…”

“i-i…” that was the first time you’ve ever heard him stutter, and if the situation wasn’t so tense, you would be proud you finally got one-up on him. “i can’t say… it’s for your own safety and mine.”

“so he was right?”

he remained silent, trying to think of some way to counter what seong gi-hun had told you, but if you didn’t believe the elaborate lie he already told you and wanted to learn more, then he knew this was the end of the road. 

“i-i need some time to think…” you looked defeated and it broke his heart. “i’m going to my mom’s house tonight, i’ll be back tomorrow—“ you got up, not bothering to pack anything aside from your phone and your wallet.

he had prepared for you to start screaming and crying (not that he would blame you, i mean, who would willingly stay with a man who was complicit in mass murder), demanding a divorce and packing your things to shut the door for him never to be seen again with your unborn child. the strangely calm reaction was both a relief and extremely unsettling to him.

“i won’t be mad if you decide not to come back” he stated plainly, defeated in a state you’ve never seen him in before. “whatever choice you make, i’ll support you, just know i love you— more than anything else in this world.”

you stared at him blankly through the open doorway. perhaps your husband isn’t the perfect man you believed him to be, but he was as honest as he possibly could have been with you regarding the matter, and that’s enough. 

“i love you too, i’ll be back in the morning.” that’s how you feel at the moment, but you don’t know if you’ll feel the same way tomorrow morning when it sinks in.

[mistressmxggot]

Chapter 5- ✰ When I Picture You ✰

"𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝗱 𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝘄𝗿𝗼𝗻𝗴. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗻'𝘁 𝗶𝗻 𝗽𝘂𝗿𝗴𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆, 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝗛𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗶𝘁 𝗱𝗲𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗹𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝘀𝗲."

Tags: Physical assault, imprisonment, manipulation

~The next day started that same as yesterday, you were scared, angry, and frustrated. Staying in bed for a while seemed like a good idea. You didn't want to get up, and you didnt want to face her.

The sound of knocking felt like a boulder hitting you in the head.

"What."

Quiet followed. The door peeked open, a woman's head poking in. She opened the door wider, slowly creeping into the room.

"Ms Medarda has sent me to assist you."

If you never had to hear that goddamn name again, you'd be beyond happy and content. The woman's steps grew closer,  her face coming into view. She was cute, a pair of square glasses sat on her button nose with a head of short, brown curls surrounding her round face. She smiled, placing a glass of water on the drawer to the right of you. You reluctantly sat up.

"When you have finished your breakfast, I will show you around."

You eyed her. What was Ambessa's angle with this girl? There was always something with her. She seemed nice enough.

"What's your name?"

She smiled. "My name is Vivian, but you may call me Viv."

You returned the smile and got out of bed.

"I will leave you to any private buisness. Please find me outside when you are finished."

With that she left the room, gently closing the door. Leaving this room felt like walking into another dimension. Out there, you were always on edge, waiting for Ambessa's next move. You were hungry, and you couldn't hide in here forever.

After finishing your hygiene and getting dressed, you met Vivian outside your door. On the walk to the dining room, you were constantly searching for Ambessa. Thank goodness she was elsewhere.

Vivian happily ate breakfast with you. She was good company, and she wasn't terrifying like Ambessa and Rictus were. When you both finished breakfast, she dragged you through the entire place. You saw Ambessa once, speaking to some person of importance. She gave you one glance, and nothing else.

The place was beautiful, but huge. You had to have seen ever item in existence in this place. You saw the throne room, the training area, multiple living areas and a dancing area with multiple poles. Had she made that for you? You wondered. There were only a couple rooms you couldn't go in. Her offices and two locked rooms. You didn't want to know what was behind those doors. It was none of your buisness, and you wanted to keep it that way. The library was by far your favorite. There were more books than any person needed, rows and rows of multiple genres. Lounge areas sat in different parts of the room. It seemed bigger than the entire Last Drop, maybe two of it combined. It was a brown room, sunken in and cozy. Reading every book possible in this room was the goal. The library was definitely the best room in the house.

A pause for lunch and more discovery before dinner. You saw her gardens, a large backyard that seemed to go for miles. Plants and flowers of every kind and of course multiple servants tending to them. The entire structure reflected Ms Medarda.

She was there at dinner with you. It passed by silent, and then she was gone again. You had fallen asleep that night thinking about her. You were always thinking about her.

This place wasn't too bad. You came to the library often, always getting caught in books. You read books about dragons and ways of war. You read classics and dramas. Viv was fun to be around. She was nice and a person of comfort. There was still a disconnect. There seemed to be alot of things she couldn't tell you. You understood, she was still Ambessa's servant.

You only saw Ambessa during dinner, which was usually silent. You had spoken a couple times. She would ask you if you were alright and if you were going to paint anytime soon. She actually genuinely seemed interested. Days passed, but night was always spent thinking. When night time came around, you had time to think about alot, unfortunately. She didn't force you to do anything you didn't want to do. She just...kept you. It confused you. What did she want?

You had heard noises coming from her room tonight. Surprisingly, these were the first noises you heard this past week and a half. You'd thought that she would be fucking like a rabbit. Covering your head with the pillow, you tried not to make out any words or sounds coming from the other room. She was so nasty. The warmth around around your head soon soothed you to sleep.

You woke up the next day, once again a glass of water left for you. You were annoyed today, not exactly sure why. Everything tipped off your attitude and you especially didn't want to see Ambessa. Viv was the only thing that calmed you down. She told you that Ambessa wanted you to buy something for yourself. You initially scoffed, but you wanted to get supplies for painting. She gave you some money and the two of you went to the town.

The town was nice. People were friendly, but your mind was elsewhere. All you seemed to think about was Ambessa. It didn't matter how many times Viv pulled you out of your thoughts to focus on something else. Your mind always drifted back to her.

The two of you returned a little before dinner. You passed Ambessa on the way to your room.

"What did you purchase?"

You looked up at her. "Just some art supplies."

"Is that all? No clothing or a personal item for you?"

"I didnt want to spend it all. I mean it was alot of money."

She let out a laugh.

"I suppose."

With a smile and a hm, she left you. That annoyed you. She was annoying. What did she mean I suppose? Was that not alot of money? You were just relieved she had gone. Her presence took so much energy from you.

You knew you had to talk to her and figure something out. Maybe you could offer her something. You needed to find a way home.

With a frustrated sigh, you returned to your room. Curled into the fetal position, you lay in your bed. Thoughts wandered to places you didn't want them too. You couldn't exactly figure out if you missed the brothel. You should miss it. You should miss Malik. You shouldn't be enjoying the things she gave to you. She was infuriating and so intelligent and intoxicating.

Stop it.

She was terrible and you hated her. You didn't.

This was purgatory. You wanted to hate her. You should. You should hate her and everything here. To be fair, life at the brothel wasn't great. Malik was...Malik. Zaun was your home. You assumed that's were you belonged. It didn't matter you had to sell your body and deal with Malik's abuse. Zaun was your home. Zaun was your-

"Supper is ready."

You heard Vivian's voice. A grimace crossed your face.

"Not hungry."

Vivian uncomfortably shifted on her feet. "Please. Ms Medarda awaits you."

You growled at her. "Viv.. Seriously please go away."

The door softly shut, leaving you alone again. You forced your mind to drift elsewhere. Maybe you should just leave, Malik would have to understand. Your eyes began to get heavy. They shot back open when you heard those heavy footsteps approaching your room. There was no knocking, you heard her just bust through the door. Anxiety covered your body.

"Why are you refusing to eat?"

You stayed under the covers.

"Not hungry."

She sighed loudly. "Come eat supper."

"I said I'm not hungry. Get out."

Her footsteps approached the bed. You quickly pulled the blanket off, shooting out of bed.

"Get away from me!"

She gave you a confused but stern look.

"You will eat. Address your feelings later."

Your eyebrows knotted in anger. She was beyond infuriating.

"I don't want to eat. I want to go home. Ask Malik to come get me or take me back. Something. Anything!"

She kept watching you. With wide strides, she approached. You backed up, hitting the drawer behind you. She grabbed you arm, pulling you aggressively towards her.

"What are you doing?!"

The pad of her thumb ran over the faded bruises on your arm. She sighed.

"Everything I have given you.." Her eyes met yours. "Everything I could give you, yet you still want to return to him."

Shame sat deep in you. "You don't know anything about me!" You yelled back at her, snatching your arm out of her grip. She let you.

Before you could think, your stomach and face were pressed into the bed. Ambessa bend her hard body over yours, forcing you further into the soft blankets. Her left hand pushed on your nape, her right binding yours behind your back. She leaned her head down to yours, lips brushing against your ear. Your face stuck to the furs, sweat clinging to your skin. Her hand started at the base of your scalp, working it's way down your spine. You shivered, cowering further into the bed. Ambessa tutted, letting out an exaggerated sigh.

"I think I know what your feeling. I am feeling it too. I know what you want, as do you."

You struggled under her hold, face red. "What are you talking about?! Get off of me!"

Your entire body was on edge, breath picking up. This was awful, your body responding in ways you didn't want it to.

"Get off! Get off!"

She pulled back. You layed there, your wet face still buried in the blankets.

"Come eat. I won't tell you again."

She began to make her way towards the door. You stood up. You were so angry, your entire body hot. You couldn't think. You weren't thinking. There was a half full glass of water still on the dresser.

Don't do this.

You grabbed the glass of water, launching it at her back. You had only realized what you had done when you heard the sharp shatter of the glass hitting the floor.

This was it. You were done. You thought about Malik and the brothel. About Viv and that amazing salad you had the first week. You thought about your father, God rest him. You thought about your apartment and that stray cat you saved from starving.

She would surely kill you for this. Would she give you a proper burial? Or would she throw your cold body into a ditch for wolves to eat at you? Your mouth became dry as you watched her slowly turn. First she had a blank face. Shock? Disbelief? You couldn't tell. Anger lit up in her eyes and you think you peed a little bit.

"I'm so sorry I didn't- I wasn't-"

She made her way towards you, faster than you wanted her to.

"Please I-"

Her hand grabbed your neck, the other pulling at you hair. You screamed, trying to kick and push away from her. She dragged you through the hallway.

"Rictus open the door!"

You panted, watching as she dragged you towards one of the forbidden doors. Oh god.  Rictus followed, holding a pair of keys. He opened the door, a long dark staircase waiting for you. You didn't want to know what was down there. She pulled you down the stairs. The blood drained out of your face. There, in a long hallway, were multiple cells. Rictus unlocked one, opening the door for Ambessa. She threw you in, your body sliding across the floor. She entered and grabbed your hair again, bringing her face close you yours.

"Perhaps I've been to lenient with you girl. So ungrateful. Should I just take what I want?"

You cried out. "Please no I'm sorry!"

She pushed your haed into the ground, standing up and swiftly leaving the cell. You heard the door slam shut and the sound of it locking you in. Her heavy footsteps dissapearing.

You lie there, tears burning your vision. Sobs echoed threw the cell. All the things she said ran through your head. She was wrong. She was just trying to manipulate you. She was wrong. Your sobs began to quiet, your eyes getting heavy. You were exhausted. Mentally and emotionally. Of course the cold, hard floor wasn't comfortable, but you were so tired. You didn't want to think about her anymore, you couldn't. You just wanted to sleep.

You were at the brothel. Her muscular body approached you, hips swaying seductively. Her lips were parted. Her heavy, lustful eyes never left yours.

"Show me."

Her thick voice rung in your ears. You obeyed, slowly slipping off your bra. She smiled, her eyes dropping to your breasts.

"So beautiful. Proceed."

You let out a weak whimper, slowly spreading your knees apart. Her eyes trailed down to your soaked cunt. Your white underwear now all see-through. She leaned down, running her large hands over your knees, then down your thighs. She gently pushed them together. You looked at her with pleading eyes. Ambessa slowly pulled down your underwear, tossing them to the side. Her breathing stopped as she spread your knees apart. Your entire face was red and hot, the warmth of her hands sending tingles to your groin. Your breath hitched in your throat. She leaned her head down, her eyes never leaving yours. You could feel wetness on your cheeks. This was more than you ever thought it would be. Her energy was too much, your body responding to ever part of her. You gasped as her gorgeous mouth met your cunt. She watched your head fall back. Her thick tongue petting your slit before sucking your clit into her mouth. You groaned loudly, thighs closing around her head. She didn't seem to mind. You could feel your orgasm climbing quickly, breath becoming sporadic. She sucked harder, moaning into your cunt. You moaned loudly, your climax taking over your entire body. She lifted her head, staring into your eyes. You two just looked at eachother for a while. Your face was wet and flush. "Come to me little lamb." You blinked at her.

Your eyes opened, back sore from the hard floor.

"Oh my god."

Your dream came back to you. Shame and regret bit at you. Looking down, you spread your thighs. Stickiness clung to your skin. You just had a wet fucking dream about Ambessa fucking Medarda after being thrown into a cold fucking jail cell. You had been wrong. You weren't in purgatory, you were in Hell and it definitely could get worse.~

You. Always. Masterlist

This chapter whooped my ass but it was fun to write 😭 Merry Christmas.

Lmk to be added.

Taglist: @maaaaaaaaaaari , @ivorydevil , @trizxyp , @ambessaswifey , @randomstuffthatdontmakesense , @simplyxwwww , @last-dropsevi

[sturniqloo]

° NOTHING ELSE °

pairing: Chris Sturniolo & fem!reader

in which: after a long day at work all you want is to be close to your boyfriend. ♡

~warning: nothing,its all fluff,nicknames,English is not my first language! ~

Wednesdays. How you hated them.

You're currently sitting in your office,having tons of paper to sort out and put into system for company you worked for,the sound of rain hitting the windows,keyboard of your computer clicking as your fingers almost finished all the work,only other sound was little hums you left throughout the time...the sighs,the deep breaths,the melodies that were in your mind.

It was enough of a bad day for you,your period,the stupid rain,the coworkers being annoying..just everything was irritating you,and the tons of work didn't help much.

Only thing that helped your mind ease was Chris..knowing he was at home,waiting for you,made you feel warm and relaxed. He was everything you needed. Nothing else.

As you glanced at the clock on the wall,it was near 01:30pm.

'Just an hour and a half more untill being home.'

You thought to yourself .

Your head pounding and the sudden sound of growling in your stomach breaking the silence. You haven't eaten anything yet,but lunch at home won't be soon enough and at this moment the only thing you wanted was to just lay down,sleep and eat. With a big exhale,you moved the chair and leaned back,rubbing your eyes in exhaustion as your gaze fall to the phone on the desk. Thinking about calling Chris sounded like the best thing possible right now. Without hesitation you picked it up,your finger hovering over his contact before calling him. As soon as he answered you can hear his voice.

'hey ma',what's up?'

'hey baby..nothing..-im just exhausted and bored..wanna be home right now'

Your voice tired and soft over the phone. It was clear you needed rest.

After a long call with Chris,time passed,it was now 2:15pm.

'Ugh,just a little more..'

You said to yourself with a big sigh,wishing the time can just pass as soon as possible.

Fastly enough it was time. The clock hit 3pm. Signaling it was time to go home.

You got in the car and drove to your and Chris's house,opening the doors,the warm cozy atmosphere hitting you immediately,the smell of a welcoming home.Taking your shoes off,and putting your coat away you see Chris waiting for you on a couch,your gaze falling to the table in front of him,with bouquet of flowers and ordered food. You could feel your face grinning into a smile,as he stood up towards you.

'hey baby,m'so glad you're back..finally.'

With a kiss on a forehead he pulled you down on the couch to lay with him.

'how was work darling? anything happened?'

He asked while running his hands through your hair softly.

'no,just ton of works,it was very exhausting today...'

You answered while relaxing into his touch,the headache already feeling better.

'well..we can do something if you want,like go out for a walk or little drive..whatever you feel like doing,im down'

His voice was soft and sincere,always knowing what to say or do to make you feel instantly better.

'mhmm..we can stay home tonight,exactly how we are right now,i don't wanna move,just wanna be like this-close to you..it's all i need at the moment'

Chris instantly got that and just relaxed with you,cuddling you even more and just doing everything he could to be there for you.

'i love you,you know that right?'

His voice suddenly breaks the comfortable silence.The words full of truth and emotions.

'yes baby,i love you too'

The only sound right now was your giggle,you always enjoyed times like this with him.You could do it forever,it was all you needed.

Just Chris,and nothing else. ♡

author's note: sorry if this is not good,or long,but Im trynna get back into writting,i hope you liked it,lmk what yall think and ofc I always take requests! ♡tell me if you wanna be added to my taglist! also wanna thank to @strnilolover my Gabby for giving me an idea,love her so much ♡

° Lili's corner °

no pressure tags: @chrislilcumslvt @chrislilcumslvt @mattscoquette @adoreechxmpion @strnilolover @mattslolita @sturn10log1rl @luvleyangeldust

[aettuddae]

business matter — chapter 129.

a christmas special.

↳ synopsis: two of the most important kpop companies covet a partnership with a huge global brand, only to be surprised when the deal is extended to both labels. fearing potential sabotage and cynical strategies to secure exclusivity for just one of them, both CEOs resort to desperate measures. in a bid to maintain trust and prevent betrayal before the signing, they come up with a pact: forcing a fake relationship between the leaders of their star girlgroups. if one side attempted to fail the other, they threaten to expose it all to the conservative south korea.

masterlist | prev | next

[written chapter]

serim was not good at coping with the cold. she liked the winter, she had always done, since she was little she spent most of the year looking forward to the low temperatures and, with it, the snow, but still, she was not good at coping with that time of the year. she always got sick and she used to care little about it, but since she became a trainee and later a singer she had to start taking care of her health and vocal cords, so in the most recent years of her life she hardly ever left her house during those times, unless she went to the many activities an idol has to do during the holidays or one of her friends insisted so much that she could not say no.

on that day serim's house was extremely warm, because even though she was not working, she was used to doing everything possible to avoid illness, and she was not willing to surrender to the freezing weather in seoul. she felt sorry for her plants, many were not the kind that could stand being in such a warm environment, but it was a force greater than herself.

having an altered perception of climate, she did not even think about the wind and the coolness that would hit her when she opened the balcony door, causing her to jump back inside and quickly close the sliding glass. she was extremely excited, running around the house and talking to her hedgehog who was pacing the living room floor uncomprehending and probably sweating from how high the thermostat was set. she went with speed to her room and threw on whatever winter clothes she could find, then hurried back and tried again to get outside.

still shivering a little, she leaned her forearms against the railing of her balcony and leaned against it, watching the first snow fall in seoul.

she loved winter, and even though it was still a month away, she loved the feeling of christmas approaching. the first snowfall had always been one of those important events for her. one of those that when it's about to happen you can't shake the anxiety, or the sensation that something important is in the air. it tends to fall in late november and serim during those dates was always on the lookout for any sign of what day it would be. she loved it, and as soon as she saw it happening just outside her house, she couldn't contain her joy, standing there motionless watching the snowflakes fall for a long while.

she had nothing better to do, after all, the hiatus was killing her. her friends were fully occupied, her members were in the activities she would want to be in and her family was far away in daegu. she couldn't help that those would be lonely and boring holidays, but at least she had time to appreciate nice things like this one.

or so she would once she opened the door to whoever claimed to see her in the middle of a snowfall.

serim sighed, she hated it when she was interrupted in her few moments when she could enjoy things that excited her. she walked back into her apartment and made her way to open the door.

the doorbell had rung, not the telecommunicator, so she figured it might be one of her bandmates, her manager, or a friend. since she didn't have to work or keep a schedule, she wasn't fully aware of what day it was, so she wasn't aware of what her acquaintances might be doing at the moment or who was free.

what she didn't expect was to find jimin behind the door.

it had been a couple of months since she had seen her in person, although they texted sometimes, maybe since september they hadn't been in one another's presence. she was always busy, she had gone on tour and back, only to embark on a new comeback and promotions season. awards season had started as well and she, as the big star of the year, had to be at every event that happened. while serim had been a little more docile with her, open to the idea of doing some things together if the occasion arose, jimin just hadn't had the time, she wanted to take serim on dates, on trips, be together at her house, go for walks, help her with whatever she needed, but she was overworked and couldn't afford it.

except for that day, one of the few days off she'd had in a while.

jimin had been looking forward to it because she had already planned to go visit serim, even if she threw a tantrum when she saw her, she wanted to at least hug her after those two months without having her around, without feeling her scent nor holding her hands. she hadn't told her she was going because she didn't want to be rejected before she could be in front of the woman, which risked a fit of possible anger from the older girl, but jimin missed her so much that she didn't think anything through.

she just needed a plan, something to do together if serim didn't kick her out of her house, and the snow had come as if it heard her pleading. as soon as she looked out her window and noticed the first flakes, she got ready at the speed of light and frantically went out to find a cab. and now she was in the hallway of serim's apartment, covered in snow, her arms stretched in the air in excitement and wearing a silly grin because of the oldest.

she looked so adorable in that stupid giant blue scarf and her glasses that serim had to resist the urge to throw herself at her, limbs almost lifting on their own, stifling a smile using all the strength in her body.

serim had missed jimin too, of course she had, and she hated herself for it.

"what are you doing here?" the owner of the apartment asked not even greeting her.

"why do you have hello kitty pants on?" she ignored, not wanting to deal with her bitterness, and pointed to the pink garment with drawings of the character.

"because i'm at home." she said obviously.

"it's a choice." she cocked her head to the side without stopping to look at them.

"are you going to tell me what you're doing in my house while it's snowing?" she folded her arms and furrowed her eyebrows.

"that!" she jumped on the spot with glee. "i came looking for you so we could go see the first snow of the year together!" she announced in a jovial tone.

"and why would i want to see the first snow with you?" she was dying to go with her.

"because you love me." she replied simply. "and even my company is better than watching it from your balcony alone." she obtruded.

"how do you know i was watching it from the balcony?" she exclaimed in surprise.

"you're covered in coats when inside your house it's amazonian temperatures and you have snow melting on your arms." she pointed to the detail.

serim raised her arms suddenly placing them in front of her eyes to look at the clues of her actions in these startled, with her mouth slightly open, confirming that she had given herself away. she dropped them on both sides of her body dejectedly and gave the girl a sideways glance, contemplating her proposal, to end up turning around without a word and heading to her bedroom.

"where are you going?" confused, the younger girl raised her voice as she watched her walk away.

maybe serim was feeling very lonely during the hiatus, or maybe she needed jimin more than she liked to admit.

"i can't leave my house in hello kitty pants." she replied disinterestedly, causing the happy grimace on karina's face to widen.

in an extremely awkward silence they made their way to the small park in the gated community where serim resided. they had so many things they wanted to say to each other, but communication had never been their best quality as a duo. serim wanted to know how she had been during that time, if she was tired, and how her busy schedule was treating her, or ask why she couldn't get her out of her mind even when they hadn't seen each other for so long. jimin, on her side, wanted to generate any kind of conversation, it was enough for her to know that serim was enjoying her company. but neither of them dared to let that happen, whether it was out of spite or fear.

but jimin hadn't gone to see her in such particular weather after so many days of not having her around just to be silent, though if that's the way it should be, at least she was happy to have her at arm's length. she took a breath and with the hand that gravitated around serim's she reached for hers, intertwining their fingers once their palms came into contact. pathetically, she found herself closing her eyes for a second, bracing herself for the terrible reaction expected from the woman, but she received none, the girl left her hand there with hers, and jimin turned to check, disoriented, only to find her admiring the falling snow so fascinated that she hadn't remembered she had to hate karina full time.

she smiled to herself as she closed the distance between them, making their bodies rub against each other, securing her grip on her.

she was walking hand in hand with serim, when was the last time that had happened? her heart was beating at such a rapid rate as her senses were lost in the warmth and perfume of the woman that it felt like a drill.

when they arrived at the park it was almost empty. it was not a place where there were never many people as it was in a neighborhood of rich people who didn't have time or desire to walk around the area, and fewer people there were going to be with such weather. they walked calmly to the center in a void of words that was no longer as uncomfortable as a few blocks ago, stopping near the structure that crowned the place to appreciate how the snow fell on it and its surroundings.

"do you like snow?" inquired karina once they found a position where they could appreciate the spectacle and stood there.

"yes i like it, winter it's my favorite season." she gave her a look for the first time all the way there. "even though my immune system is a mess, i always get sick." she let out a sheepish chuckle.

"winter is my favorite season too." she settled in by tying her body to jang's arm. "and that's because you don't eat well!" she complained. "but don't worry, if you get sick i'll take care of you." she arranged a few strands of hair falling over the older girl's face.

"i do eat well only you don't see it." she smiled sideways.

"don't try lying to me." she shot her a look of suspicion, making her laugh.

jimin couldn't hide the satisfaction that this had brought her, feeling that serim didn't hate her for a second, she felt fulfilled. they held each other for a moment there watching the scenery, being as close as they rarely were outside of serim's room, swaying quietly as if they weren't two hurricanes trying to fit together. karina released her grip on her to put herself opposite to her and take the vocalist's face in her hands, leaning her body forward to leave a soft kiss on her cheek. serim wasn't expecting it and the surprise left her serious, speechless, she averted her gaze to the side, pressing her lips into a line, but a slight blush was exposed on her cheeks that she hoped jimin would believe was just from the cold.

"namu." she called to her in a low tone, so that only she would hear. "i have to tell you something."

"what is it?" she turned her eyes to her, face expressionless.

"i..." she took a long breath through her nose, trying to calm the uneasiness in her stomach from nerves. "i want you." she blurted out, pulling her shoulders back a little, puffing out her chest showing confidence. "and i want to spend this christmas with you."

"this christmas you're going to be working." she rebutted with discomfiture. "just like me, i hope." she spoke to the sky as if asking god.

"no, namu." she was already beginning to feel the anxiety of not being able to emit what she felt the right way and was giving her first uneasy hands through the air. "i mean i want to spend this christmas with you and many more." she clarified. "i want you to be my present." she rested her index finger on the girl's chest, pointing at her. "i want to kiss you and have you be the first person i greet." she held up the opening of the girl's coat. "i want to be with you."

serim was having difficulty maintaining eye contact, and even more difficulty finding something to reply to a statement that made her uneasy. "what do you mean by that?"

"i'm confessing." she admitted simply. "that's what you're supposed to do in the first snow."

"a confession is for someone who doesn't know how you feel." sadness returned to her demeanor as it always did when she was around jimin. "i think you've already told me everything you have going on with me."

"really?" her voice rose slightly, getting a little desperate. "do you really think you know everything i feel about you?" she questioned. "do you know that i can't stop thinking about you? that every action i take i think about what your reaction would be?" her breathing was slowly failing. "i have a hard time sleeping at night because i wish you were by my side." she rubbed her face with her palms trying to get rid of the frustration.

"jimin, the problem is that i don't believe you." she interrupted her weakly, her eyes on the floor.

"and what do you need me to do to prove to you that it's true?" her movements were wide and fast because of distress. "to make you understand that i despise myself almost as much as you do for hurting you." she believed her eyes were glazing over, but she didn't have the composure to concentrate on anything at the moment. "i was wrong, serim, i tried to pretend that nothing changed in my life the moment we got the deal, that you didn't shake my floor from the first moment." she was thankful that they are practically alone in the park because she was embarrassing herself. "i tried to do what i thought was best for me and i was wrong, i'm sorry, i'm so sorry." she swallowed hard trying to undo the lump in her throat. "i understand that i hurted you, that i was an idiot, but i want you." she assured. "i need you." she added. "and i don't know how to make you see that."

"do you love me?" she finally dared to face her.

"serim." she diverted her attention to something off to the side, blocking herself completely.

"serim, what?" she bit down hard. "that's what i need." she confirmed. "if you can tell me to my face that you love me, then i'm willing to take the time to work out everything bad that happened between us." she asked. "if you tell me that you love me, i'll leave it in the past."

"i adore you with all my heart." she closed her eyes as if that could make that moment less real.

"but it's not enough."

"no, it's not that." she held her arms so she wouldn't pull away. "it's complicated." tears began to stain her cheeks. "i care for you so much..."

"why is it so hard for you to say you love me?" there was disappointment in her eyes. "don't you feel it?"

"it's not that i don't feel it..."

"then what is it?" she became defensive.

"it's complicated." she reiterated. "it's difficult." she said in a defeated attitude. "this all happened under peculiar circumstances and-"

"then it's difficult for me to forgive you." she cut her off.

serim raised her hands to remove the hold the younger girl had on her and started walking with speed back to her house. jimin watched her walk away, but wouldn't let her go, she ran out after her, catching her, making them face each other. she lifted serim's hand, bringing it to her lips to give it a short kiss while their eyes were connected, thus then grabbing her waist and pulling her close enough that she could rest her forehead against hers just by folding her body a little forward.

"make a wish." she murmured.

"can you leave me alone?"

"if you say it out loud it doesn't come true." she shook her head.

serim dropped her eyelids, a little because she no longer had the strength to argue or resist the questionable things jimin did, and a little because she wanted to stop the approaching crying, karina copied the actions when she saw her do it. after a moment they both, still with their heads against each other, looked at each other again, ruefully and wearily.

"you won't tell me what it is this time?" the blackhaired inquired.

"you said it." she whispered. "if i tell you it won't come true."

—that you can accept that you love me. —thought serim.

"i asked for you to let me go make cookies at your house."

"i can't believe it." she broke off suddenly. "are you serious?" she shouted at her upset.

"i know we just fought, but we always fight." she tried to reason, seriousness of the moment all gone. "i haven't seen you in two months, i just want to spend time with you." she pleaded. "get mad at me later, but don't leave now." she added. "please, stop leaving."

serim hated herself for how aware she was that no matter how angry she got with jimin, for whatever reason, she always came back to her. "if you say it out loud it doesn't come true." she reiterated bitterly as she realized how pathetic she was.

"but you miss me too."

"let's go." she commanded, causing the younger girl to cheer. "but no joy." she pointed her finger at her apprehensively. "i'm too upset with you." she reminded. "these are going to be the saddest cookies you'll ever eat in your life."

[heesimp]

please never stop writing about heehoon omg

scenario for u muah

warnings: heehoon fucking lol, not proofread

Sunghoon and Heeseung, for once, have no plans for the weekend and elected to remain indoors for the sole reason of being too horny. They’ve been fooling around for the better half of this week when work isn’t consuming them. Sunghoon likes seeing Heeseung get his first taste of sex without girls involved. It’s like his own personalized porn fantasy.

Heeseung’s cock is pressed against Sunghoon’s on his bed while their lips lock in a battle for passion. Their bare bodies are warm to the touch on this Saturday night and both of them elected to keep their phones in the living room while they fool around in Heeseung’s room. Their cocks are hard and leaking, with Heeseung’s asshole lubed and prepped by his best friend’s tongue and fingers, and he wants nothing more than to feel his wrinkled hole stretched around Sunghoon.

“Love how desperate you get,” the younger boy mutters against Heeseung with a smirk on his lips. Heeseung jerks his hips until Sunghoon’s cock is situation between his ass cheeks. He can’t help that he grinds against Sunghoon’s wet, hard cock. It’s too sexy not to.

“You bring out something in me, I guess.”

Sunghoon grips Heeseung’s asscheeks and spreads them apart while he thrusts his hips to match the speed. “Can’t wait to fuck your ass. I’ll mold your hole to my dick.”

Heeseung grunts. “I wanna fuck your ass too.”

“You think you can?”

He rolls his eye. “You know I can. How many girls have I fucked in front of you?”

Sunghoon chuckles. “Oh yeah, I remember. You like to fuck hard.”

“I’ll fuck you hard.” Sunghoon tuts.

“One day. But right now, you’re gonna ride my cock like a good boy.”

“Fuck yeah.”

Heeseung arches his back and sits upright while Sunghoon spreads his legs wider. He reaches underneath to find Heeseung’s hole and rubs the pads of his fingers of it until the older boy moans in contentment, his eyes finding Sunghoon’s before giving him a lopsided smile. Sunghoon sticks a finger in and watches as the boy on top of him loses his sanity at the pleasure of his shallow, soft thrusts.

“Ready for my cock?” Heeseung reached behind to pump Sunghoon, who’s wet beyond compare with his precum and the lube from earlier. “

“Fuck me, Hoon.”

Sunghoon pulls his finger out of Heeseung and grips his own cock, sliding the tip over his friend’s hole to gather the lubricant and spread it around. Heeseung’s brow furrows as he looks down and touches the ridges of Sunghoon’s chest while he feels his cock enter his asshole.

“So fuckin’ tight,” Sunghoon grunts as he pushes an inch inside. His tip disappears and Heeseung clenches his ass, which makes Sunghoon grunt louder.

The music in the background, the playlist Sunghoon and Heeseung put on when they’re hooking up with girls, makes them horny beyond compare. Sunghoon grips Heeseung’s asscheeks as the older boy starts to sink until he’s halfway full. He doesn’t dare to fuck Heeseung the way he wants to yet, allowing him to adjust to the feeling of a hard dick inside of his asshole. Heeseung jerks his own cock off as he slowly rises and falls onto Sunghoon, who looks up at him like a saint of some kind.

“Pretty soon, you’ll be able to take a nice pounding.”

Heeseung moans. “Want that.”

“I’ll need to train you first.”

“Fuck.” Heeseung lets go of his cock and reaches behind him to cup Sunghoon’s balls between his fingers and smiles at the boy when he hears him moan.

Sunghoon starts to thrust himself inside of Heeseung but keeps himself restrained for now. His ass is so tight and warm like something snuggling him in the best way possible. Sunghoon’s grip on Heeseung’s asscheeks makes it easier to hold him in place while his cock bounces in and out of his asshole.

“Filthy fucking asshole,” Sunghoon moans. “You like my cock in it, don’t you?”

“I fucking love it.” Heeseung squeezes Sunghoon’s balls, which makes him fuck into his asshole quicker. “I want you to use my ass.”

“Yeah? Gonna let me abuse your pretty hole? Let my big dick pound you like I want to?”

“Yes! Fuck.”

Sunghoon laughs incredulously. “You’re gonna make me cum already.”

“Cum inside me.”

“Want a creampie in your ass?”

Heeseung nods frantically and holds his cock in his hand, jerking it furiously as Sunghoon continues to fuck inside him. “Cum in my ass, Hoon. Fuck, do it right now.”

“I’ll give you my cum. Shit, shit.”

The older boy feels Sunghoon’s white ropes release in his asshole and it makes his own seed spill onto his chest. Heeseung’s cum paints Sunghoon like a cherished painting to the point where it dips into every ridge. Sunghoon throbs within Heeseung and neither of them can complain about the feeling of fucking your best friend when nobody knows.

Heeseung rises until Sunghoon’s softening cock slips out and dips down to capture his lips into a soft kiss.

“We should fuck and watch porn next,” Heeseung mutters against Sunghoon’s lips. “You should let me fuck your asshole too.”

[olvxva]

unspoken flames | joost klein x f!reader

part II

✦ wc: 2.7 k

✦ warnings: angst, friends to not really lovers, smoking, mentions of drinking, rpf

✦ an: got a request about friends to lovers, but ofc i had to make this as angsty as possible hehe. i'm thinking about writing a second part so let me know if i should do it ;)

pushing your way through the crowd, you dreamed of nothing more than getting outside as quickly as possible. chaos surrounded you from all sides – the intense smell of sweat and alcohol mingled with the pounding bass of music that seemed to seep into your very bones. the lights cast surreal shadows on sweaty faces, adding to the overwhelming atmosphere. every step was a challenge, and every accidental brush with another body only heightened your urge to escape.

your gaze darted desperately until you finally spotted the much-desired metal door. its surface gleamed under the club's flashing lights. you fixed your full attention on it, ignoring everything else around you. with all your strength, you pushed it open, as if that single motion held the promise of freedom.

outside, everything felt different. the cold night wind wrapped around your overheated skin, soothing its burning sensation. the air smelled of dampness and the city, each breath filling you with a sense of renewed energy. you closed your eyes for a moment, leaning your back against the rough concrete wall. its cool surface seeped through the thin fabric of your clothing.

the wind played with your hair, lifting it gently, and you felt as though time had slowed. the chaos that had surrounded you moments ago now seemed like an unreal memory. the music still echoed in your ears, but it was muffled and distant. at last, you felt the tension go away, replaced by a calmness that filled every corner of your body.

you reached into your bag, feeling an abrupt need to deliver nicotine to your brain, desperate for relief. your fingers plunged into its depths, brushing against everything except what you were searching for.

“shit” you muttered under your breath, rummaging further into the abyss of your small, red bag. its contents seemed infinite, as if all the frustration built up in your body had found an outlet in this attempt to locate a cigarette. finally, your fingers brushed against the cool, metallic shape of your lighter, and soon after, you found the familiar pack of cigarettes.

you pulled a cigarette from the pack and placed it between your lips, the red lipstick marking the tip. your fingers trembled slightly as you brought the lighter closer to your face, focusing on the spark wheel. but instead of the expected flame, you only heard the dry click of it failing.

"are you kidding me?" you whispered desperately, trying to ignite a tiny flame, as if your determination could somehow bring that damn lighter back to life.

"really? right now?"

the wind toyed with the unlit cigarette in your mouth, and you began to wonder whether you should go back inside for a new lighter or just give up entirely.

you lifted your gaze, hoping someone might rescue you from this unfortunate situation. turning your head to the right, you heard voices and laughter coming from that direction. without thinking too much, you adjusted your coat on your shoulders, trying to look more composed than you felt, and headed toward them.

"uhm, hey, sorry to bother you…" you cleared your throat uncertainly as you approached.

three pairs of eyes immediately turned toward you, one pair in particular catching your attention. his eyes, shining in the streetlight, held something hypnotic that threw you off balance for a moment.

"i just wanted to ask if you might have a lighter to borrow?" you replied with a slightly tipsy smile, trying to mask your shyness. you noticed the corner of his lips lift in a nearly imperceptible grin before he reached into his pocket.

"anything for a beautiful lady" said the blonde, handing you the small metal object that gleamed in the lamplight.

you twirled the lighter in your fingers, examining its smooth surface as if you wanted to memorize this small but saving gesture. you looked up at the blonde and flashed him the widest smile you could manage at that moment.

"thank you" you said, your voice carrying sincere gratitude.

the blonde returned your smile, his eyes sparkling with amusement.

"no problem. if I can help in a crisis, why not?" he joked, and the rest of the group smiled in amusement as well.

you pressed the lighter to your cigarette, finally letting the small flame catch the end. you inhaled deeply, feeling the nicotine spread through your body. as you exhaled the smoke, you glanced at the blonde once more.

"you’re saving my life," you said half-jokingly, fully aware of how ironic it sounded.

and that’s how you met Joost. something in the air changed that evening, and from that moment on, everything was different. you weren’t sure if it was his warm smile or the effortless jokes he threw around, but something made you feel different. anyway, whatever began that night, on the cold sidewalk outside the club, was bound to develop into the most wonderful friendship you had ever experienced.

it didn’t take long for you to get to know his friends and each one of them loved you as much as you loved them. you felt like you had fallen into a big, loving family you never knew you were missing, though you never admitted it. they were there when you needed support – whether during a wild night full of laughter and alcohol, or in quiet conversations at three in the morning, when the world seemed heavier than usual.

still, it was joost who was the first thought that crossed your mind when you opened your eyes every morning, and the one who lingered in your thoughts as you drifted to sleep. your friendship was perfectly normal, at least on the surface. conversations flowed effortlessly, from casual jokes to deep discussions that lasted for hours. he was someone who knew how to make you forget everything that weighed you down. he could listen when words failed you.

there was nothing extraordinary about you two, yet you felt that every little gesture – the way he’d fix your hair after you made a joke too stupid not to laugh at, or how he could read the exhaustion in your voice before you even mentioned it – meant more than you were willing to admit.

in his presence, the world became simpler. sometimes it felt like you could tell him everything, and other times, silence was enough because you understood each other without words. at some point, he became a constant in your life, a part of your everyday routine.

that’s why, when you saw him that evening, talking to some girl at the bar, something inside you froze. his smile – the same one you knew so well – was directed only at her. you felt a kind of tightness in your stomach, somewhere between irritation and sadness, something you couldn’t name. your heart started to beat faster, and every second of watching them seemed like unnecessary cruelty.

“damn it” you muttered under your breath, turning away, but the image of the two of them had already burned itself into your memory.

for a moment, you tried to rationalize – after all, nothing had ever happened between you, right? just friendship, only friendship. that was how it was meant to be, how it should be. but the tightness in your stomach, the pang you felt each time he glanced toward someone else, told a completely different story.

you knew you were screwed. it wasn’t that you wanted something to change. it was the unwanted, painful realization that Joost had never been "just a friend" to you.

you returned to the group of your mutual friends, still trying to suppress the emotions that clouded your mind. your face felt as pale as a wall. not looking ahead, you bumped into Apson. he looked at you with slight concern, raising an eyebrow in worry, though his lips still wore a gentle smile.

“hey, y/n, where are you rushing off to? everything okay? you look like you've seen a ghost” he joked, trying to ease the tension that was clearly hanging in the air.

“i'm fine” you quickly replied, trying to sound convincing, though even to yourself, you sounded weak “i think i’m just feeling a little off.”

his eyes narrowed slightly, as if trying to read something more from your face, but before he could say anything, you already looked away, ready to leave. everything inside you was screaming for escape – from this place, these people, and most of all, from the thought that had started to take root in your mind that evening.

you grabbed your coat and, throwing a quick “bye, everyone” over your shoulder, left the club. deep down, you were thankful Joost hadn’t been part of all this. you wouldn’t have been able to look him in the eye that evening.

his smile, which had always made you feel good, now seemed like something you couldn’t bear. besides, what were you supposed to say to him? “you know, Joost, i think i’m starting to feel something for you, but i don’t know what to do about it”? it would be ridiculous. instead, you’d rather just disappear, give yourself a moment to calm down, to understand what exactly had just happened. for now, you didn’t want to think about what awaited you when you’d see him again.

lost in deep thought, you didn’t even notice when you found yourself at the door to your apartment. you turned the key with trembling hands, eager to get inside as quickly as possible. you shut the door behind you, and the tension in your body eased slightly, though the unease still clung to you. you needed nothing more right now than a shower and some sleep. you tossed your coat onto the chair, slipped off your shoes, and thought of nothing but a brief escape from your thoughts.

you stepped under the stream of hot water, feeling the tension finally start to ease. yet, despite everything, deep in your mind, you could still hear his laughter, see her gaze. you felt like you had come to a standstill, trapped in a circle that you yourself had created.

for a moment, you closed your eyes, trying to escape it all, but something inside told you that the night wasn’t over yet. the feeling of unease crushed you from the inside.

you stepped out of the warm shower, feeling a little better. your body craved sleep more than ever before. dressed in the first t-shirt and sweatpants you found, you looked more like a shadow of yourself than someone ready for bed. hurriedly, you entered your bedroom, closing the door behind you. your body was ready to forget about everything, even if just for a while.

you lay down on the bed, closing your eyes and immediately feeling the weight of your eyelids. it seemed that sleep would finally be your escape. suddenly, amidst the silence, a loud sound of the doorbell rang out.

you paused for a moment, as if the sound had pulled you out of your stupor. your heart began to race, and an unsettling thought crossed your mind – someone unexpectedly appeared at this hour. you slowly got out of bed, feeling every part of your body begging for rest, but you knew you had to check who it was.

before you could make it to the hallway, the sound repeated, louder, more insistent. only one person came to mind who could possibly show up at this hour. you cautiously opened the door, and before you could react, the tall blond with a mustache barged into your apartment. you closed the door behind him and turned toward the living room, where he now stood. he looked at you, his face tense. he was angry, very angry.

"it's nice to see you too" you blurted out suddenly, fed up with the strange tension hanging in the air. this was not how you wanted to spend your night.

"what the hell, y/n, what's going on with you?" he replied after a moment. his voice was full of frustration, and his eyes held not just anger, but fear "you walk out of the club without a word, don't answer your phone. i thought something happened to you, damn it!"

his words hit you like a cold shower and the mix of anger and fear made you feel like you were guilty of something you didn't fully understand yet. you paused, trying to calm down, but you couldn't explain why you had disappeared so suddenly. and you had really forgotten to charge the damn phone right when you got back.

"sorry," you muttered softly, though it didn't sound like a real apology "i just… needed to get away."

you couldn't tell him everything. you couldn't reveal your feelings, because you were afraid it would ruin everything. you couldn't lose him.

"you needed to get away?" Joost almost shouted "from what exactly, that you had to disappear without anyone knowing where you were?"

his voice echoed in your apartment, and you felt the tension inside you grow. Joost's words were like blades, hitting straight at your heart. you knew he was right, that you had run away without explaining, but you couldn’t find the right words to explain why. how could you tell him that seeing him with that girl made you want to disappear?

"Joost, i…" you started, but your voice cracked. you took a deep breath, trying to calm yourself "i just… felt stuffy. i needed some air."

his gaze became even more intense. there was something in it that made you want to both hide from him and scream everything that had been weighing on your heart.

"stuffy? really, y/n? you think i’m going to believe it’s just about some damn need for air? i’ve known you long enough to know when something’s off!"

you didn’t know how to respond. the truth hung on the tip of your tongue, ready to spill out, but you held it back at the last moment. could you risk everything you had by telling him what was really going on?

"Joost, drop it. it doesn't matter. as you can see, i'm alive, i'm fine, and i just want to go to bed already" you replied evasively.

he looked at you with raised eyebrows. he wasn’t buying your words. in his eyes, there was still a mixture of frustration and concern that made you feel even more trapped.

"don’t try to feed me such bullshit" he said in a lowered voice, but his tone didn't lose any of its intensity "i know you better, y/n. i’m not an idiot. something’s wrong, and you’re pushing me away as if that’s going to change anything."

you opened your mouth to say something, but no words came. Joost stood in front of you, still looking at you with determination, making you feel like you were backed into a corner.

"i’m not letting go" he added, taking a step toward you "so either you tell me what's going on, or i’ll stand here all night."

"great, well, i wish you a good night then" you threw back, wanting to end this conversation before it completely got out of control. you tried to walk past him toward the bedroom, but Joost was faster.

he grabbed your arm, turning you toward him. his gaze drilled into you, intense and full of emotions that seemed too complicated to read.

"we're not done" he said quietly but firmly "you can’t just brush me off like that. not after you left me in the club without a word."

he was so close now that you felt all the emotions you'd been suppressing throughout the evening rise to the surface with double the force.

"Joost…" you began, but he quickly interrupted you.

"i want to know. why did you run away? what happened?" his voice was no longer angry, but rather full of desperation, which gripped you harder than his hand on your shoulder.

Joost looked at you, and his words echoed in your mind like a mantra. there was something in them that broke down all the walls you had so carefully built. feeling like you couldn’t run away anymore, you gathered the courage to look him straight in the eye.

"why?!" you asked almost screaming "what would you do if i told you i couldn’t stay there because… because seeing you with her, at that damn bar, made me want to disappear?!"

his face froze, and his hand slowly lowered from your shoulder, as if each of your words pierced him deeper than he could have predicted. the room fell silent, but in your head, it was loud.

"what do you mean by that?" he asked finally, his voice a shadow of the anger he had earlier, replaced now by something more delicate, more fragile.

you took a deep breath, feeling like there was no turning back.

"that seeing you…" you started, but your words broke "seeing you with someone else makes me feel like someone is ripping my heart out. because, damn it, Joost, i think about you every day, every night, and what i saw today just made me realize i'm alone in all of this!"

the air between you thickened to the point where you felt like you could barely breathe. Joost stood still, and his eyes were filled with something that made you regret your words for a moment. at the same time, you knew you had to say it, even if it meant everything might change.

Joost looked at you with such an expression that for a moment, you hoped what you said would change something. but then his lips twitched, and a mix of regret and uncertainty appeared in his eyes, effectively crushing that hope.

"y/n…" he started, his voice soft, almost breaking. "i- i don't know what to say."

he took a step back, as if he needed space, and his hand rubbed the back of his neck in a nervous gesture.

"you’re one of the most important people in my life," he continued, each word feeling like another sting "but… i just don’t see us that way..."

those words pierced you like a knife. you felt your heart contract with pain, and the world around you seemed to blur.

"i don’t want to lose you" he added quickly, as if afraid that every glance from you meant the end of your relationship "but what you feel… i can’t give you that."

you didn’t know what to say. every word seemed inadequate and the silence between you was heavier than anything you’d ever experienced.

"i’m sorry..." he said finally, his voice trembling, but he couldn’t look you in the eye.

and before you could speak, before you could react in any way, Joost turned and left, closing the door behind him. you were left alone in your apartment, surrounded by a silence that sounded louder than any sound.

[bambisnc]

can you write something about winter????? write harever you want with gn!reader. thank you!!!

apple cider [ft. k.mj]

pairing : winter x gn!reader genre : everything i write is crack honestly. some fluff cw/tw : swearing + uneditted af xx + reader is js confused <3 wc : 0.7k?

your first time meeting kim minjeong had entailed a bruised hip, a spilled drink and a late pass.

it was almost as if the universe had had it pre-determined; made up its mind, even, for you to not like her.

... sure, it might've slightly been your fault that you were late and scrambling to find a seat in the already pretty hectic classroom that caused you to bump into said girl,.. which in turn had the equal and opposite reaction of her managing to push you and your (now bruised) hip with a loud thud! towards one of the tables.

which lead to you spilling your entire drink all~ over your shirt.

your favorite shirt.

before you even knew her name, you had decided you were not a fan. and even now, having spent considerable time in roughly the same friend group,.. you really don’t get the hype around her. 

okay, yes, you admit she’s, like, really nice and pretty and helpful and cute, but it’s whatever.

hence, obviously, the only liable course of action then was to take advantage of the fact that your teacher announced a project to be done in pairs and end up being minjeong’s partner because you don’t really like anyone else in that class which somehow ends up with you having to break her out of a literal, physical fight with some girl whose name you couldn’t even be bothered knowing.

huh? 

“let’s meet at the library.” she had suggested, “it’ll be quiet – it’d be easy for us to focus and get our work over and done with as fast as possible.” 

you had taken a little offense to that. but hey, at least you knew your (slightly) bitter feelings towards her were just as reciprocated. 

so naturally you were surprised when you walked straight into a crowd in the otherwise quiet hall, and happened upon the previously mentioned scene. 

the tense scene was captivating, to say the least. both girls involved showed no apparent signs of remorse or stopping. it even took you a while to manage to pick up your jaw off the floor and move to intervene, albeit your actions being mostly on instinct.

you’re not quite sure why you did it. maybe because your project was at stake? yeah that was probably the only reason.

… doing so was shockingly easy, however. the minute minjeong felt your touch on her, she paused, quietly. a strangely herculean feat on her part, considering how fiercely she’d been fighting merely seconds ago.

but her opponent didn’t have the same mindset. despite the comparatively much more bruised appearance (minjeong barely even had a scratch on her, really), she still found the ability to paste on a sneer and speak out. “wah~ your beloved’s here for you, huh? here to rescue you? just like you were trying to keep their name clear from the rumors-” 

at which point, the girl previously in your grasp all but leapt out to land one last (rather satisfying) punch square on her opponent’s face. 

and then, wordlessly, effortlessly, she walked out;... with you trailing behind, mind chock-full of questions but not being really sure how to express even one of them.

you could only watch as she walked all the way to the courtyard with all the casualness of the world before sitting down on one of the benches .. and soon find yourself stopping in front of her, offering her the bottle clutched in your hand all this while, surprising not only minjeong but also yourself. 

“...you’re probably tired out after all that .. exertion. plus dehydration’s never fun.” is your flimsy, offhanded excuse.

she smiles, then, and accepts it, but both you and her know that she doesn’t really believe it. 

your eyes meet hers, finally, asking if she’d mind company. she shakes her head, no, shifting to make space for you. 

the warmth of the late evening embraces both of you with an orange haze. from where you’re sitting, a disarmingly comforting scent invades your senses, your mindspace even. 

it’s somewhat fruity. and it’s so inexplicably kim minjeong that you feel like you’re almost going crazy for thinking about it like that.

when minjeong hands you back the bottle, you notice rather grimly that she’s finished almost the whole drink, “i didn’t know you liked apple cider too. it suits you, weirdly.” 

her words only barely register, but her voice manages to crash your reverie completely. 

what exactly was that bitch girl saying earlier in the library?

why are you even here with kim minjeong right now? it’s not like you owe her comfort or anything, it was her fault for getting into an unnecessary fight (over you?....) in the first place  –  god knows you don’t even like her that much.

…

wait. fuck.

notes : tysmmm for requesting lovely <3 im sorry it took like. almost exactly 6 months (june 24th.........) :( + [m.list] song rec : ill edit link in later but apple cider by queen bea

𐙚 . regulars : @brocoliisscared ⋆

[feelbokkie]

L♡VE IN F♡CUS | Chapter 16

PAIRING: idol!Changbin x fem reader

WARNINGS: swearing, mention of food and eating

GENRE: smau, crack, angst, fluff

P♡V: 1st/2nd person (depending on how you view it)

SUMMARY: Amateur concert photographer Y/n has recently been promoted to junior music journalist. Her first assignment? An exposé on the popular Kpop boy group, Stray Kids. Spending an entire tour doing in depth interviews with eight men seems simple enough, but one member isn't exactly open to the idea. Will Y/n be able to break down the walls around his heart, or will her big break turn into a big disaster?

TAGLIST: open

W♡RD C♡UNT: 1,485

SCREENSH♡T C♡UNT: 21

A/N: Merry Christmas and Happy first night of Hanukkah to all who celebrate! Happy Wednesday to everyone who doesn't! Here's a new chapter! (Or happy Thursday if it's the 26th for you)

PREVIOUS | MASTERLIST | NEXT

©feelbokkie (2024) — all rights reserved. reposting/modification of any kind is not tolerated.

You double-check the draws of your desk, making sure you have everything think you’ll need for the second keg of the tour. Your top drawer is filled with snacks that you know Frankie and Wonseok will devour within a week-- if they even let it last that long. But the files you’ve kept on rookie groups and potential idols that you think may debut soon—debut in general— sit in a small box that you’re planning on dropping off at the group of desks that being to the junior writers in your department.

It’s something you should have done when you first got your promotion. You should have tried again before you left the first time, but a part of you thought you could still use the information you gathered over the years. But if the “My Summer a Stay” project with Stray Kids goes well, you’ll spend more time covering already established groups rather than rookies and survival show contestants.

“Getting ready to leave us again, huh?” Yoona, one of the reporters in your department asks as she walks up to your desk.

Saying she’s in your department is a stretch. She works in the entertainment department of the paper like you, Wonseok, and Frankie but she works in the gossip division. More specifically, she’s one of the few people the company hired to work specifically on scandals within the music industry. Calling her your archnemesis is a stretch but while you work to build up careers, she breaks them down. And for that, you dislike her strongly. You don’t even hide it. At least, not well.

“Yeah, the tour is starting up again.” Your voice is flat and even, trying to show as much disinterest in the conversation as you possibly can so she’ll leave you alone sooner.

“I envy you, Y/n.” She sits on the edge of your desk, trapping one of the folders you need to take with you but don’t want to get bent in your bag. “You’re just with these idols all of the time. I can only imagine what you must hear and see…”

That’s why she’s here…

You tilt your head to the side; your eyes widen almost with a childlike wonder. “What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean.” She chuckles softly as she leans in closer. “I took a sneak peek at your little secret project. You’re with them all the time. I’m sure you’ve overheard some conversations or even caught a glimpse of what’s on their phones.”

She’s fishing. If it’s for something specific, you’re not sure. You try not to follow scandals too closely. Most of them don’t concern you and are ridiculous. You do know it’s been generally quiet. Not many dating rumors or other false claims have made their rounds on the internet for a while. Anything else would be real news and would require Yoona and the other “reporters” in her division to do actual work before publishing. And you refuse to make their simple jobs easier for them.

“Ah, I…I’m having trouble understanding. Sorry, my Korean is not good…” You do your best to butcher the pronunciation and speak broken Korean, which is harder now after years of speaking it primarily.

Yoona’s eyes narrow as she sits up straighter. “That’s not cute, Y/n.”

“Pardon?” You tilt your head to the other side.

Yoona’s mouth opens and closes before she lets out a little annoyed huff of air. “You’ve been here for half a decade and you write full articles in Korean. Don’t try to act like you don’t know what I’m asking.”

“This is a bit embarrassing but…I use Google Translate to write my articles. I write in English and translate. Please don’t say anything.”

Yoona crosses her arms across her chest, her eyes scan every part of your face. You close your bag and sit back in your chair, trying to not give her the satisfaction that she so desperately craves. Suddenly, the corners of her mouth turn up into a smile that would make the Cheshire cat envious. Her eyes light up, almost like a light bulb went off in her head.

“You do know something, don’t you?”

Oh lovely, she’s delusional.

You look around the office, most of the office is empty with nearly everyone gone for lunch. Still, there are a few people who are working through lunch. Luckily for you, you moved into the main offices right before you left for the first leg of the tour so not many people know you that well. Unluckily for your desk mate, he happens to be working through lunch.

"Um...excuse me? I'm having trouble understanding what she's saying. Can you help?" You bother your desk mate. He looks up from his laptop, completely confused and partially startled by the sudden interaction. You're not sure what he was so focused on but part of you feels bad.

"Uh--"

"Forget it," Yoona waves him off, no longer wanting to participate in your little charade. "Y/n, I know you're hiding something. There's no way you don't know anything. Stop faking,"

"But eonni--"

Buzz, buzz

Your eyes glance over to your phone sitting face up right next to your keyboard. You don't miss the fact that Yoona's eyes also land on your phone. Part of you freezes when you see the word "Eonni" light up on your screen. You quickly snatch your phone and send the call to voicemail as the list of things your sister needs now floods your brain.

"You have your sister in your phone as "eonni?" How curious..." Yoona suggests. You can see the gears turning right through her pupils, working out her next story.

"Whatever convoluted story you're coming up with, scrap it right now." You say firmly.

Buzz, buzz

You let out a swear under your breath as you send your sister to voicemail again, really not wanting to deal with whatever family drama is currently going on.

What time is it over there anyway? Early morning? Late night? Afternoon?

"I'm not doing anything. Is there a story there?" She feigns innocence by tilting her head and speaking in a low, condescending tone.

"I'm serious," You stand up and gather all of your things, yanking the file from under Yoona.

Buzz, buzz

"Aren't you going to answer that?" Yoona smirks. She hops off your desk and starts walking towards the door. "Don't worry, I'll leave you to talk to your "eonni.""

"It's not like..." Your voice dies in your throat as she continues to walk out.

You let out a long, exhausted sigh like a balloon deflating. Your attention is brought back to your phone as it continues to ring in your hand. Pressure builds behind your eyes as you think about what could be so urgent right now. You say a silent prayer to-- whoever will answer at this point--and answer the phone.

"What could you possibly need right now?" Mindful of all of your coworkers still in the office, you try your best not to scream. Still, your tone is harsher than you intended.

"Wow, you send the girl to the other side of the world and she thinks she's so important. She doesn't even answer the phone anymore and yet when she does, she has the audacity to be bitchy. I'm so sorry Your Highness," Your sister scoffs on the other end.

You bite the inside of your cheek, not hard enough to draw blood but enough to stop yourself from saying something that will start an argument. It's the last thing you need today. On top of making sure you have everything you need from work, you've been pulling all-nighters the past couple of weeks you've been home trying to fix what your team failed to understand from your emails and Zoom meetings. You're already dreading how much more work you're going to have to deal with when you get back from this leg of the tour now that there's going to be a large time difference between you and them.

"I'm sorry, I'm at work right now." Balancing your phone between your ear and your shoulder, you do your best to secure your things in your arms as you head over to the elevator.

You press the down button with your foot, miraculously without dropping anything or toppling over, and wait for the elevator to reach your floor.

"Yeah, yeah, I know all about your fancy job all the way in Korea. Jesus, you don't have to brag."

Ding!

You walk into the elevator and press the button for the floor below you where all of the interns and lower-level reporters in your department work. Most of them are probably all out right now so you'll just leave the box of your notes on your old advisor's desk and send her a text.

"I'm about to leave for a meeting. What did you need?" You lie.

"It's about mom,"

—

Buy me a coffee?

—

TAG LIST (closed)

Red means that it wouldn't let me tag you (either at all or properly)

@amyyscorner @puppysmileseungmin @lixie-phoria @yongbbokkie @spearb-99 

@weird-bookworm @stayconnecteed @brain-empty-only-draken @hanniemylovelyquokka @sunshinessky 

@marked-unknown @lanatheawesome @theblindhag @skz-f0rlif3 @f9clementine 

@kalopsian-thoughts @ismelllikechlorine247 @hyunjineret @kangaracharacha @slut4colinbridgerton 

@reverse-soe @cupidsmoons @jungwonderz @szkstay @tenmii 

@stay278 @phtogravi @hannahs-docx @jihanlovic @alnex05 

@beccaskz @starlostastronaut @itsseohannbin @kayleefriedchicken @anushasstuff

@jutdwae-archives @dazzlingjade @itzella @divineinsanity @skzjen

[doja365]

Crybaby(Chapter 1)

Dollhouse Masterlist TW- Neglect

Escape

That's all I could think about.

Escaping

Running, killing, hiding. Nothing would fill the void that was made only for me.

Killing is what I did most, well luckily since Talia Al Ghul was my trainer.

She took me in when I was on the run from my own family. She was cruel but sweet sometimes. She made me forget everything I left the Waynes for.

I had all the training I needed. I learned Jiu jitsu, Aikido, everything!

I was trained to be one thing

A murderer.

I still had school but when I talk to other kids they get scared of me. Why?

I enjoyed all kinds of art. Drawing, painting, movies, novels, and you know where I'm getting at. The kids looked at me like I was crazy, did I do something to them? Momma T, always adored what I did, it always seemed, normal.

I get the nice family I've been asking for instead of dealing with a rich man-whore as a father and possible drug-dealers as brothers. Damian always hit me for being a bitch and I don't know why. I mean I know his mother must've died and is stuck with a dick-head like Wayne but why deflect on me?

People know I'm different but I do the things girls do, I paint, I dance, I play instruments, and I know how to sing. I'm not that different from them.

But soon I understood, I learned to kill, hack, and steal. I learned all the horrendous things that was actually able to keep me alive. And for that I am thankful. I can even speak 8 languages for the sake of preventing exposure.

I am now Eurus Pirate Al Ghul the now concierge of crime.

I'm now a legal adult that makes her own decisions on the highest bidder for my next target.

5 years ago...

BANG!

"Did I get it?" I asked.

"Yes, sweetheart, you are becoming smarter now. I want you to come with me." Grandpa Ghul replied.

My challenge was to practice the art of stealth and elimination of opponents. I had to wear a tight uncomfortable black suit for the purpose of camouflage.

We arrived at a foyer and I saw mom nearby so I ran to her.

"Momma!" I ran straight to her and hugged her.

"Hey Pirate, I need you to do something and it's important for all of us." She said as she knelt down to me giving me a katana.

I would do everything for them, they saved me. But I never really knew it.

"Eurus, when you came here you looked like your father. Driven by rage and sadness, now it has brought our paths to cross." He said.

I smiled gladly, acknowledging his words and veneering gratitude. But I still didn't understand why I was here.

"But, I still need to test your commitment to justice. Don't be as gullible as your father, Bruce Wayne, young one."

A guard nearby dragged a shirtless man who was actually a thief. And Grandpa gave me the katana.

"Grandpa you're wrong about one thing."

"What?"

"Bruce Wayne's not my father."

SLASH!

"It's good to see someone make the right choice. Now someone clean this mess up."

"You've shown that you're dedicated to serving justice. Now you shall receive your title."

"What is it?"

"Artemis"

"As a reward, with no Ego, I can assure you, this is the finest sword"

The last memory I held onto for the days to come

Present...

I was drinking some scotch whilst smoking, and I waited for my next assignment. I was able to graduate as an archaeologists because I get good money on the side, and it's easier with the whole assassin thing.

RING!

"What is it Tank?" I asked. Each one of us calls each other by nicknames in order to prevent prying eyes. The only time we address each other by our real name is when we are at the penthouse.

"We got one for ya Artie."

"Let this be a bit harder, alright sweetheart I don't want my target to be a 50 year old hormonal man with only Mickey Mouse as his guard."

I swear that sounded a lot better in my head.

"Relax Artemis, this one's gonna be good I promise."

"Where's the target?"

"Gotham."

"You better not be fucking with me T."

"Check your front door."

I opened the door and saw a big box. It contained the file with some weapons and a 'welcome home gift'. Gosh he can be such a bitch most of the time. I read the file and I wish I could unsee it.

"I know you'd like this Artie"

File:

Name: Jason Todd Alias: Red Hood Kill Count: 83 Status: Alive Price: $500,000 Location: Gotham Brought To: Joker

WANTED

"Artie, ARTEMIS! You there?"

"I could've taken it for one dollar, he's not worth this much."

"Great just give me the $499,999 and I'll split it with the rest Artie."

"Fuck you."

"I'd rather have you do that sweetheart."

"In your dreams, prepare a delivery for Jason's head to the Joker. I may be the concierge but it doesn't mean I won't kill with my bare hands. Prepare the artillery and get me a dilapidated house to prevent the media. Let's tear that bitch apart."

Taglist:

@lunayaps, @not-aya, @iluvcatzz, @vanessa-boo, @ivyrose9194,@thesehandsarerated-e,@horror-lover-69

[aviiarie]

“𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐀 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊!” — feat. kaveh & reader !

synopsis. kaveh is not having a great week. luckily, he has a best friend to distract him.

✦ contents. platonic! they are friends! best friends! modern au (they're still in university though.) some sumeru character cameos. gn!reader. fluff. 3.1k words.

✦ notes. this is my secret santa gift for.... @tragedy-of-commons! merry christmas gwen, i hope you enjoy!!! i did my best to make this as silly and fun as possible :"))

“Wow... you look even worse than I left you.”

Kaveh groaned, squeezing his eyes shut. The desk was cold under his forehead, a sweet relief from the headache pounding behind his eyes. Maybe he could lay there a little while longer, languishing in his misery, and you would lose interest and leave him. Maybe...

“Hey! Don't fall asleep on me!”

Alas, such mercy would never find him. If your voice—far too loud for a library, he would say—wasn't already enough to disturb his brooding, then the rolled up paper in your hands definitely did the job.

“Ouch,” He mumbled, rubbing the back of his head. “Leave me 'lone...”

“Nope, not a chance.” You slip into the seat directly across him, your chin resting on the palm of your hand. “So, how much progress has been made?”

“I'm at about—” Kaveh sat up wearily, sifting through his scattered papers. “—21%.”

“Weren't you at 30% an hour ago?” You blinked.

“Yes.”

“Oh, Kaveh—”

“I'm fine, I just need... some time.” Kaveh gritted out, scanning the dozens of failed designs and hastily written notes. “And... and some inspiration. And maybe some coffee too.”

“And some sleep?”

“Are you kidding?” He scoffed, as he gathered the papers into a neat pile. “I can't sleep now. I need to get this project done, or else I'm failing this class. I can't afford a fail right now, this is making up 50% of my grade, and I only scored an 85 on the written exam, and my draft is due in a week and—”

A smack in the middle of his forehead snapped him out of his rambling. Kaveh reeled back, nursing the faint sting, as you re-rolled the paper in your hand.

“What was that for!” He cried.

“You can't keep wallowing, you're never going to get anything done! It's about time you took a break.” Carefully, you unroll the paper you were holding, to reveal a colourful poster. “And I know exactly what we can do!”

Kaveh squints at the flyer. It looked to be hand-drawn and photocopied, depicting a bustling market with smiling visitors holding mouth-watering food and bags stuffed with souvenirs. Across the top, the text read: Come visit Sumeru's Fair!

“A fair...” Kaveh murmured, reading the fine text. “This says it's only open the last week of December.”

You paused, shooting him a suspicious look. “Kaveh, do you know what day it is?”

“Uh... December... something?” He guessed.

“Well—Well, yeah.” You huffed, snatching the poster back to wave in his face. “The point is, you need some time to clear your head, and I don't want to go alone. So...?”

-----

By some miracle, your persuasion (and Kaveh's weak will towards anything you try to convince him to do) is effective enough to leave his project behind. The gates are swarming with people when you arrive, a few familiar faces sticking through the crowd, along with dozens of families and couples enjoying the festivities.

“Two tickets, please!” You grinned, handing over some money to the salesperson before Kaveh could even offer to pay for his own. The tired-looking employee hands over the tickets, and you grab Kaveh's hand to drag him towards the entrance. “Thank you!”

As soon as you step through, there is a rainbow of colours filling his vision. Brightly coloured stalls are set up with carnival games, food, and other attractions on either side, forming an aisle. Behind them, he could see a Ferris Wheel peeking out over the tents, as well as some other rides he couldn't quite make out.

“What should we do first?” You asked excitedly, scanning your surroundings.

“Wasn't this your idea?” Kaveh raised an eyebrow. “Shouldn't I be asking you that?”

“Ever heard of living in the moment?” You chided, looping your arm through his to lead him forward. “Do you have money?”

Kaveh rolled his eyes, allowing himself to be pulled along. “Do you think I—”

“No, you're broke, I don't know why I asked. Okay, I have some money. Enough for a few rides and some food, at least.” You paused to take a breath, glancing over to a stall on your left. “Woah, look at that!”

Kaveh followed your gaze, to a small stand set up with a simple throwing game. There were a few old cans stacked up, and a grinning attendant looking back at the two of them with a beanbag in his hand. That wasn't what caught your attention though. No, your eyes were firmly fixed on the stuffed animal hanging at the back of the stall, dangling just out of reach like Tantalus' fruit.

“It's a peacock!” You gasped, hand reaching out as if to try and touch the plush feathers sewn into its tail. For a carnival prize, it was remarkably well-made, and utterly adorable; there was no wonder you looked entranced by it.

“Something you like?” The attendant crooned. He tossed the beanbag from hand to hand, casually throwing it in the air and catching it again. “You get three tries, knock all six cans over and pick whatever prize you want.”

Kaveh squinted at the cans. It looked easy, deceptively easy. The beanbag was soft, but appeared to be sturdy enough to knock the cans down in one go, and yet none of the prizes had been won yet. The entire game seemed fishy, but the prospect of the peacock plushie in your hands was enough to distract you. Before he could even voice his skepticism, you had bought three tries.

“Here you go,” The man behind the booth tossed you three beanbags and stepped out of the way as you lined up your throw. The first hit one of the cans squarely in the middle, but bounced right off.

“Argh!” You gritted your teeth and aimed again, as Kaveh's frown deepened.

The second throw was heavier, and hit one of the middle cans, dislodging the structure but failing to knock it down.

“Last go! Good luck.” The man laughed brightly, and you scowled. You threw the beanbag one last time, knocking the can at the very top over with the sheer force of your throw. “Nicely done! Let me get your prize.”

Your eyes lit up in anticipation, before he handed you a dusty pack of cards, the flimsy kind you would find in a discount store. “Oh... is that it?”

“Try knocking them all over, if you want something better.” He chuckled. “Unless you wanted to try again...?”

You thought about it for a moment, considering the obvious baiting versus how badly you wanted that prize. You nodded, and Kaveh sighed.

This time though, he paid attention.

The way that the cans moved when you hit them was odd. Hitting either in the center row, or the middle one in the bottom row didn't shake it enough to move much at all, but the top can knocked over easily. If he had to guess, they were weighted differently to make the structure more stable, and much harder to topple. The closest you got to tipping over any of them was when one of your beanbags hit the one on the far left, moving it slightly out of place.

Interesting.

“Ugh, this is impossible,” You groaned, after wasting another three tries.

“You're getting better each time!” The attendant said, while he fixed the can that was askew.

“Let me try.” Kaveh cut in. He handed over some of the little money he'd brought with him, and took the offered bean bags.

“Good luck,” You told him ruefully. Kaveh took a deep breath, steeling himself. His aim wasn't terrible, but with the game being as obviously rigged as it was, he wasn't certain he'd be able to hit it.

The first throw, he hit the corner can directly in the middle, just hard enough to push it backwards slightly. It didn't topple the structure, but after zeroing in on the weakest link, knocking it down would be easy.

The second throw was slightly short, only hitting the side of the can. It moved it, causing the stack to wobble, but did little to actually achieve his goal of making it fall over.

Finally, he lined up his last throw. This was it, his last chance. With all his force, he hurled the beanbag at the tower of cans, hitting the corner squarely and pushing it right over. Without the bottom to support it, the second and third layer fell down, knocking over the other cans as well.

“You did it!” You cheered, squeezing Kaveh in a quick hug.

“Congratulations!” The man said, fishing behind the counter for something. “Here you go.”

In his hands was an ugly stuffed bear, with fluorescent pink fur and beady black eyes. He held it out like it was a diamond ring, grinning at Kaveh with finality.

“Oh... but didn't you say if I knocked down six cans I could choose whatever one I wanted?” Kaveh asked, wondering if he misheard the man. He nodded towards the plush you were eyeing. “I actually wanted the peacock over there.”

“Well, see, you have to knock them down in one try if you want the big prize.” The attendant scoffed. “Or else it doesn't count.”

“You didn't say that!” You protested. “You only said knock three cans down.”

“And I did knock them down in one try,” Kaveh argued. “On my last try, they all fell down at once.”

“It has to be your first one, boy.”

“You didn't say that either!” You threw your hands up in frustration, voice reaching a shout.

“Fine.” Kaveh snatched the ugly looking bear, and shoved it at you. He dug around for his wallet, slapping the last of his money on the counter.

“You already won a bear, don't you want to let someone else have a turn?” The attendant protested. Sure enough, there was a small line of people waiting for their turn. Still, Kaveh shook his head.

“One more turn, and I leave.”

The man, perhaps hoping to make him leave quicker, or perhaps just interested in more of his money, handed him some more beanbags with a grumble. He turned around to set up the cans again, arranging them into another pyramid.

Kaveh watched him carefully, noting the way he paused before placing down each can, clearly feeling the weight of each. He noted the way the man was sure to place the slightly lighter can on the other corner, probably hoping that Kaveh would aim for the same one and fail to knock it over.

“Hit it as hard as you can,” You whispered to him, once he was done. “Picture it as something you hate, and hit it with everything you've got.”

Kaveh squinted at the cans. Something he hated...

Nothing immediately came to mind. Perhaps his roommate, who had a personality as enjoyable as a rainy, downcast day. Maybe that engineering professor who marked him down for a tiny spelling mistake. Or even the attendant glowering back at him as he waited for his throw.

Of course, he could always picture that project he was working on, the one that cost him far too many days and nights and still remained unfinished. As he stared at the rusty metal, all he could see was the crossed out sketches and scribbled notes, all a mess that he couldn't decipher. They taunted him; a monument to his failures and shortcomings, a reminder of the progress that he has yet to make—

Without thinking, he reeled back his arm and hurled the beanbag as hard as he could, slamming it into the can. The entire tower toppled over, cans falling from the table onto the floor.

“Yeah! That's my best friend!” You yelled, pumping your fist in the air.

Kaveh tried not to look smug, but a wide grin was already spreading across his face. “The peacock, please.”

The stuffed animal was reluctantly taken down and handed over to him, before he passed it to you.

“There. Consider it my thanks for the ticket,” Kaveh said proudly.

“Thank you,” You smiled down at the peacock, running your hand through the soft tail feathers. “I love it.”

-----

After a few more games with far less luck, the pair of you stopped by the food stalls to get something to eat. There was a wide variety, with some fried foods, some sweet snacks, even a stand selling freshly squeezed lemonade.

You settled on a stall selling pita pockets, and Kaveh had no objections. The smell alone was enough to convince him to line up.

“Oh! Hi [Name], hi Kaveh!” A familiar voice chirped. Collei was stood at the counter, smiling widely.

“Collei, I didn't expect to see you here!” Kaveh greeted her warmly.

“It's my after-school job!” She explained. “I'm trying to earn some extra money for my treatment. I can't be dependent on Tighnari for everything, you know!”

Kaveh's smile faltered for just a moment. Collei's declining health wasn't a secret; there was a reason that her brother had to take care of her so much, but she was still so selfless, even with all of her struggles.

“Ah, I should have asked!” Collei jumped suddenly, scrambling to grab her notepad. “What can I get you today?”

“Just two pita pockets please,” You ordered. “And a water, too.”

“Coming right up!”

After getting your food, the two of you sat down to eat in a shady spot by the fence. The pita pockets were warm and fresh, the perfect thing to quell Kaveh's hunger. When was the last time he had a cooked meal, or any food that wasn't straight out of a vending machine? The focus on his project had stolen away all his attention, leaving him to neglect his own appetite.

“What's next?” You asked through a mouthful of bread, your words slightly muffled.

Kaveh hummed, surveying the rest of the fair. You had walked through most of the surroundings, leaving only a small section unexplored. That portion happened to be the part with all of the rides, where the Ferris Wheel loomed over the food stalls.

“How about the Ferris Wheel?” Kaveh suggested.

Your eyes lit up again, and you jumped to your feet. “Yes! Let's go!”

-----

In hindsight, you should have expected the line, but neither of you even considered the possibility until you were stuck in the middle of it. It was cramped and uncomfortable; the overwhelming crowds were almost enough to deter you. Almost.

“This is taking forever.” You groaned, slumping against Kaveh.

“Have a little patience.” Kaveh sighed, even as his own patience was wearing thin.

Directly in front was an irritated boy with a bowlcut who Kaveh was certain was in one of his classes, accompanied by a young white-haired girl holding his sleeve. Ahead of them, there was a family of four, several couples, another group of friends, and many more waiting for their turn.

It was going to be a long time before they even saw the ticket booth, let alone made it on the Ferris Wheel.

“Oh my, [Name]! Is that you?” A sweet voice called out to you.

You turned to see Nilou, a cheerful girl and another student at your university, waving to catch your attention as she walked over.

“Oh, hi!” You greeted. “How are you?”

“I'm good! I came with Dehya instead, and it's been a wonderful day.” She smiled back, smoothing down the front of her dress.

“That's good. We're just—” You jerked your head to motion towards the line. “—Waiting, as you can tell.”

“Ah, I see. Well, I'm glad you ended up coming, even if you didn't come with me. Isn't it wonderful?” Nilou gushed.

You nodded, with a slightly strained smile. Kaveh noticed the change instantly, studying your expression with a frown. “Yeah, it is.”

“I'd better go, Dehya is waiting for me. Take care, [Name]!” Nilou gave you a brief side-hug, before waving goodbye and dashing off.

“I didn't know you were friends with Nilou.” Kaveh said as soon as she left.

“Yeah, she's a classmate.” You said simply, leaving it at that.

After some time, you managed to make it into the compartment and on the Ferris Wheel. Kaveh sat across from you, pulling his legs close so you had more room to get comfortable, and your peacock plushie rested on your lap. The entire box was filled with windows, giving you a full view of the fair as it rose into the air.

“Woah... you can see everything up here.” As the box began to dip back down, your head swiveled to see as much of the area as possible.

“It's amazing... everything looks so small.” Kaveh breathed, as you hummed in agreement.

The two of you lapsed into a comfortable silence, simply basking in each other's company as you observed the landscape below. There wasn't a need for awkward small talk or idle conversation to fill the space between you; you were happy to just exist with each other for a moment.

“There's one thing I don't get.” Kaveh said suddenly. You looked away from the window with a curious expression, silently waiting for him to elaborate. “You said you didn't have anyone to go here with, but Nilou implied she already asked you and you turned her down. Why is that?”

“Oh. Yeah. I lied.” You shrugged, turning back to watch the Ferris Wheel move upwards.

“Why would you lie?” Kaveh spluttered at your nonchalant response.

You made a noncommittal noise, shrugging again. “Nilou could find someone else to go with. I wanted to go with you.”

He stumbled over his words, trying to get out a coherent response. “But—But why?”

“Do I need a reason?” You laughed, bright and clear. “You're my best friend. And besides, you needed a break. I haven't seen you this relaxed in a week.”

Kaveh fell silent. You had a point, he hadn't felt as relaxed in a while. In fact, he had barely given all of his stresses a thought, since you dragged him to the fair.

You always had that way with him, able to pull him out of his own head and get him back on his feet. Ever since you became friends, you were the ray of sunshine peeking through the clouds and bringing light to even his most dull days.

Maybe that was the foundation of your relationship, all the times you had seen each other at rock bottom, and still stuck around to bring the other back to the surface for air. He'd been witness to many of your own late-night breakdowns over failed assignments and miserable group projects, but he would never dream of leaving you to deal with it on your own.

It was you and him, against the world. As close as two friends could be, and he wouldn't have it any other way.

“What would I do without you?” Kaveh sighed, with a smile on his face. You looked back and grinned at him, the sunlight on your face making it look like you were glowing.

“No idea. But you're stuck with me now.”

🏷️ taglist: @tragedy-of-commons, @mollzaj, @wystiix, @mikashisus.

© aviiarie 2024. do not copy, repost, translate or use my work to train ai

[apparitionism]

Real

Can’t believe tomorrow is a particular Wednesday already; this season has rushed in like the most foolish of fools, and as a result I’m rushing to push out this new holiday story... because I too am a fool. This is set post-series (including the nonexistent season), though not by much, as the first little bit will make clear. It’s kind of all about fallout. And who wants what, and why, and whether they’re willing to work, wait, and do other things that probably start with “w” to get it. Anyway, season’s greetings to all—and to all (including, eventually, Myka and Helena, I promise) a good night.

Real

“She’s back,” Artie announces one autumn night, and before anyone (Myka) can fully register what that might mean...

...she is.

Is, is, is... a distillation of so much of what Myka instantaneously knows again as possibility, as hopes and wishes jolting back to life, as again (still) the only presence that instantly makes Myka aware of herself as a body, one that responds with barely controllable fervor to that presence—that other body.

Artie goes on saying words, “reinstated” and “agent” among them, but the roaring of Myka’s blood drowns them out.

She fears she will spontaneously combust. She would rather spontaneously combust. That would be better than having to consciously keep from spontaneously combusting, in response to Helena existing, to her moving and speaking, in a proximity that Myka should prize but that her body, fervently responding, informs her is completely insufficient.

Myka escapes as soon as she can, to sit in the dark of her room, to sit and process, but her usual, reliable processing processes fail her.

They always have, where Helena is concerned.

All she does is sit, empty but for the replaying of Helena’s entry into the dining room, her stride so sure, her aspect so unlike the dismissive, shrinking shrugs of Boone... that had sent Myka’s soul soaring.

Helena had greeted them all with good humor, her manner and words to everyone so convivial. So convivial, but also: to everyone, and that is what finds clawed purchase in Myka’s heart, here in the dark.

Here in the dark, Myka viciously tells herself that she deserves no special acknowledgment. Why would you?

She also tells herself, This will get easier.

****

In some ways it does. For example, Myka’s shock at, and subsequent need to recover from, each new sight of Helena lessens somewhat. Or maybe it’s that her body becomes accustomed to absorbing the impact.

In others, it profoundly doesn’t.

Case in painful point: one evening when they’re all cleaning up after dinner, Claudia says to Helena, “So can I ask you something?”

“Clearly you can. You just did,” Helena bats back, in play, and envy stabs Myka.

“You’re as bad as Artie,” Claudia groans. “But here goes: are you still seeing that lady?”

Terror appropriates envy’s knife, gashing anew. Myka has not let herself begin to imagine how to get such a question answered, and here Claudia just says it while lowering a stack of dirty plates into the sink.

Helena’s airy reply: “Still the case. Obviously we’re long-distance at the moment.”

Something previously un-knifed in Myka collapses at that “obviously.” Obviously. Obviously. Obviously, the Warehouse return had not entailed a renouncing of Helena’s non-Warehouse connections. As Myka had obviously, she now sees, believed—hoped!—it would.

The depth and breadth of her error sends her to her room again, lightless, wounded, empty, waiting for time to pass until she once again has something to do.

Such as a retrieval with Pete.

The next one of which proceeds well—it’s not a big, dangerous deal, but rather a matter of a sad, not villainous, loner seeking connection via an artifact-compromised comic-book message board. Pete’s his enthusiastic self about the comics of it all, and Myka lets it lull her into a near-trance of this is how it used to be, before everything.

Until they’re on the plane home, when Pete says, “So H.G.’s back.”

“Thanks for the update,” she says, bracing herself, because of course that won’t be all, because that would be too easy.

“And what about that girlfriend?”

“What about her?” Well, that was stupid: asking some reflex question she doesn’t want answered. She braces herself again.

“You think she’s her one?”

That’s worse than she’d imagined. Myka doesn’t want to go anywhere near that Schrödinger-box, for fear that peeking inside would reveal a very dead cat. Would in fact be the deciding factor in that cat’s demise.

After a stretch of silence, Pete says, “Bet she’s not. So what are you gonna do about it?”

What does he mean? Do about the girlfriend not being, or being, Helena’s one? Do about Helena being back in the first place? She would rather avoid nailing that down—another let’s-not-look Schrödinger box.

“I’m going to ignore it,” she says.

“That’s not healthy. I mean, I get it, but it’s not healthy.”

He coughs ostentatiously. Meaningfully? Myka doesn’t know. Can’t tell. Won’t ask. She hates how she feels compelled to leave this cat in limbo too, just so she can shift away from any potential situational consequences.

If only she had resisted the pressure to shift her definition of love.

She tries for resistance now, even though it’s too late: “I’m not going to try to keep her from doing what she wants to do.”

He cocks his head in that exaggerated what-are-you-saying way. “I thought you might though. Try.”

Myka is tempted to demand, “Why would you think that,” but she knows why he would think it, and revisiting that fight is an impossibility. Especially now.

“But you’re not trying,” he says. His tone, though, ratchets down the danger. It’s a relief. “So why not?”

Now Myka’s tempted to give some indignant “I don’t have to justify my behavior to you” answer... and yet. She does owe him more than that. Especially now, having misled him so severely before, she owes him some decent measure of honesty. So she says it as plain as she can: “Because people should do what they want to do.”

“Huh.” He puts on his “thinking” face—the real one, not the cartoon. “But you’re not doing what you want to do.”

“What?” Myka says, playing dismissively dumb. Hoping he’ll give some dumb response.

“You want to stop her doing what she’s doing.” Myka shakes her head at that, trying to pretend it’s dumb, but Pete rolls his eyes. He sees the weakness. How can he be getting her so right in this when he got her so so so wrong before? But then again she’d got herself wrong... “So why wouldn’t you do what you want to do?” he finishes.

Want, want, want. Myka wishes he would quit using the word.

Yes it’s her fault for using it first. Yes she should have shut him down forcefully to begin with. Yes that applies to situations preceding this one.

In any case, wanting is pointless. It literally does not matter: its only product is empty space, a horrific gaping sink, a vacuum as vast as space itself.

So she says, as pedantically as she can, “Because if one person’s wants affect another person’s wants, that’s a different category of... you know what? Never mind.”

“You only ever say ‘never mind’ when you know I’m right.”

“What? I say ‘never mind’ a lot.”

“Which means...” He taps his temple.

“No. No it does not.” But she does smile.

Pete bobs his head as if she’s actually agreed with him, and so they end on a familiar, jokey note. It’s far better than they could have managed some months ago, in the immediate aftermath of their... mistake? Misunderstanding? Mismanagement? Misadventure? Misapprehension?

Stop dictionarying, she tells herself. Despite its being one of her default ways of trying to process confusion, it rarely delivers the clarity she seeks. At any rate, their short-lived whatever-it-was was a mis-everything.

She takes out the book she’s brought with her, H Is for Hawk, so as to fill her head with Heather MacDonald’s solitude rather than her own. She has lately found that overlaying her own thoughts with someone else’s ruminations is quieting, so she’s reading even more than usual... it beats sitting in darkness, waiting. Which she supposes means she should thank Helena (thank her) for her extensive new knowledge: of, here, grief and falconry, but also, the Wright brothers, Joan of Arc, India’s partition, séances in the 1920s, Salem’s witch hunts, various aspects of the Supreme Court...

Erudition must surely outweigh emotionalism Extremity. Enthrallment? Embitterment.

Stop dictionarying.

****

Relentlessly, the holidays approach. Myka tries to ignore them too, particularly their invitation to soften. Unhealthy, Pete’s accusation echoes.

But in speaking to Pete, Myka had lied: she isn’t really ignoring anything Helena-related. In a folder of significant size in her mind, she stores a cascade of spreadsheets in which she tallies and tracks as many of Helena’s movements, statements, interactions as she can, in as much detail as possible: e.g., it wasn’t enough for Myka to get Steve to tell her about his retrievals with Helena—those accounts, while captivating, were incomplete, secondhand—so she has made perverse use of her hard-earned Warehouse database access to read Helena’s actual mission reports, like some pathetic online stalker. They’re literarily significant, she tries to use as additional justification, ignoring the fact that no one other than Warehousers will ever know how or why.

It’s not that she’s hoping to gain insight from any of this; the activity is simply itself. A flat gather of data. For those spreadsheets.

Which she uses, of course, to torture herself, not least for her damning inability to gain insight. Thus proving Pete wrong: it isn’t ignoring things that’s unhealthy. No, it’s paying them attention—stupid, pointless attention—that causes disease.

That’s true, but Myka genuinely does not know how much longer she can suffer making herself sick.

Lovesick, she sometimes thinks... but that makes “love” too prominent in the mix. No, the “sick” is what matters, and it is chronic, not acute. Which means it must be managed rather than cured, and she will manage it, because she has to: because she is an agent and Helena is an agent and they live in the same house and say the same mutually polite “good morning” to each other each day.

Sometimes Myka wisps a wish, in the wake of one of those morningtides whose undertow she cannot reveal, that she could begin to shift her thinking, to try floating above rather than falling under, the better work her way to commencing the actual ignoring.

But then Helena will talk to Steve about the particulars of his Buddhist practice, or to Claudia about a joint invention project’s feasibility, or to Artie about a disputed wrinkle of history, or even to Pete about, bizarrely yet bizarrely frequently, which menu items should be avoided at fast-food chains... and Myka enters each new datum into the spreadsheets out of avid habit, all while ferally wishing everything different—even, some days, heretically, Helena gone. And while castigating herself for having wished, before, so stupidly inchoately, pleading with the universe to let Helena come back. More: to send Helena back.

How very monkey’s-paw of you, she jeers, to leave out specifics. In particular, to leave out “to me.” Send Helena back to me.

Before Helena came back, Myka was lost; now she’s still lost, but differently. And if there is one thing Myka has never liked—in fact, has always feared—it’s change.

So in truth she can probably suffer making herself sick for quite some time. As long as nothing about the making—or the sickness—changes.

****

The days leading up to Christmas itself are blessedly busy. On the 22nd, Myka and Steve head to West Virginia to bag a problematic coal-miner’s lamp; the work keeps them away until Christmas Eve, and if Myka happens to linger a bit longer at the Warehouse after Steve goes back to the B&B once they’ve deposited the artifact... well, that’s because she’s very conscientious about filing reports in a timely fashion.

In fact, she lingers a lot longer, and she’s happy to arrive home to a mostly silent B&B... however, she is instantly deposited into precisely the sort of situation she’d hoped to avoid: she must walk past Helena, who is in the living room, alone, with the television on. Impossible to slink past undetected, and thus rude to try—particularly once Helena says, “Welcome home.”

How disorienting, for Helena to be here and to say that. Worse, the articulation seems to ring of... before. When Myka was special.

But she is imagining that. She must be.

“What are you watching?” she asks, though she doesn’t need to. Helena is watching the Yule Log.

You strike me. Myka’s thought stops there, true as can be. Aloud, she says, “You know what it is, right?”

“A strangely mesmerizing facsimile of a fire,” Helena says, without looking up. “Do I strike you as hypnotized?”

Now Helena looks up. She blinks at Myka and nods, oddly soft, childlike. “I consulted Google.”

Helena is absurdly fond of Google. Myka struggles to keep from finding this absurdly charming. She struggles similarly with the way in which Helena articulates the word itself—every witnessed occurrence of which is represented in the spreadsheets. so Myka is painfully aware of the way Helena puts a slight formal emphasis on both syllables, such that it sounds, in a capping absurdity, as if she’s saying she consulted Gogol.

Not that acquiring input from a dead Russian writer would necessarily be all that different, absurdity-wise, from having instant access to a towering percentage of the world’s collective knowledge. And Helena probably understands that congruence, if that’s what it is, better than Myka ever could.

Myka knows she’s thinking herself down treacherous paths; she should say goodnight and walk away. But it’s Christmas Eve, and she gives herself a present she shouldn’t want but feels she has earned, earned by ignoring—or, to the contrary, recording—so strenuously. She has done such hard work. So she lets herself ask, “Why are you so focused?”

“Pete gave me a choice: watch the Yule Log or talk to Myka. I believe he thought I would reject the former as unworthy of my attention. Yet here I watch, mesmerized.”

“Since when do you do what Pete tells you?” But thanks, I guess, for letting me know where I stand. She can’t then hold back a jab: “Anyway, shouldn’t you be spending the holiday with the famous Giselle?”

Helena blinks again. This time it’s not at all childlike. “That’s why he wanted me to talk to you. But to answer your previous question: since he told me he’s in love with you.”

He... what? “What?”

“You asked me since when do I do what Pete tells me. I’m answering.”

Keep up, Myka; keep up. “When did he tell you that?”

“This evening. As part of what I fear—or hope?—was intended as a Christmas gift.”

“For you?” That’s not keeping up.

“No.”

“Then for who?” That’s not either.

“Whom.”

“Well, excuse my grammar, but I’m a little weirded out.” This is the most extended conversation she and Helena have had since... before. That’s destabilizing enough to her ability to concentrate on words. but what, exactly, is she supposed to do with these words?

“Weirded out,” Helena says, an unexpected affirmation. “As was I. I wasn’t aware.” She makes a small “huh” noise, as if she has to bridge her way to what’s next. “That the two of you had been involved.”

Oh. Hence the bridge—but this is a shifting surprise. “I thought someone—Claudia—would have told you. Must have told you.” Must have, and that in turn must have contributed, Myka had been sure, to Helena’s lack of engagement. She’s always known your judgment was abysmal, she’d lashed herself, based on those must haves, and this is certainly fuel for that fire.

“Our discussions have been more focused on her future. And my past. And technology, of course.”

“Of course,” Myka says. And then, quick, before she loses her nerve: “It didn’t take.”

“Technology?”

“The involvement.”

“I gathered that from its current status.”

“Right.” The conversation, such as it is, should probably end here... but something is off. “Wait. You said he said he is in love with me.”

“Yes.”

Myka had believed it was over. All over. The idea of having to deal with it, with any aspect of it, in perpetuity, or at least with no clear sundown, preemptively exhausts her. And it rekindles her anger at the entire situation, at its utter pointlessness. “I don’t know what to do with that,” she says. She immediately regrets the admission.

“He said he’ll get over it.”

“Well, that’s something. I guess.” It comes out grudging, and that’s another admission Helena shouldn’t be privy to.

“He said you won’t.”

“What? Get over it? No, the problem was that I wasn’t ever in love. With him.” She’s saying far too much. She supposes it’s fortunate that she’s looking at this repetitively flickery video loop, rather than into Helena’s eyes. She supposes also that said loop is a reasonable metaphor for how her life has been proceeding. Lately. Before, and lately.

“He said that too.”

“I’m sorry, but you’re losing me.”

“Interestingly, he said a version of that as well.”

“That you were losing him?” Not hard to believe; sometimes Pete can barely follow a laser pointer.

Helena focuses her gaze on Myka again, adamantine. “That I was losing you.”

And just like that, Myka is through the looking glass. Trapped like Alice, trying to get out. “Why would you care?” she chokes.

Helena lowers her brow, a stern schoolmarm confronting an intransigent pupil. “Because as I mentioned, he said—and seemed quite certain—that you won’t get over being in love.”

Myka knows now what’s next. Helena is about to say, “With me.” Because once again: that fight.

Oh yes I will. That’s what the ignoring is for. When I work my way around to it, that’s what it’s for.

“I didn’t know,” is what Helena actually says, clearly taking Myka’s silence as affirmation of those unuttered words.

“Oh please. Like I could have been any more obvious.” Obviously. She says it with contempt at herself, past and present: what a pathetic moonstruck puppy.

“At which point?” Helena asks.

That’s a surprisingly troubling question. Timelines. Decisions. What did you know and when did you know it? What did you show and when did you show it?

“All I knew was how you responded. Not how you felt.”

Of course the former was all Myka herself had known, certainly at first, and their consonance surprises her. If only she could share that consonance, and her surprise in it, with Helena... but that seems too much like a reward, one that neither she nor Helena deserves. Again exhaustion: at their lack of merit. “I don’t want to play these games,” she says.

“Then don’t.” Was that a shrug? Did Helena really shrug?

“Fine. I won’t.” It’s childish, yet it feels like the best end she can manage tonight. You didn’t seek this out, she assures herself as she takes a first step away.

Before she can seal the escape with her second step, Helena says, “You might at least release me from this view.”

“You talked to me,” Myka says, doing her best to make it all go away. “You’re free.”

Helena turns from the flames too quickly for Myka to dodge being caught by the look. “I am in no way free.”

That is not my problem, Myka would like to maintain, but Helena’s gaze and tone are implicating, which is entirely unfair but still needs to be dealt with. She sits down next to Helena on the sofa. At a judicious distance.

Now they are both watching the Yule Log, which, indifferent to them both, continues its facsimile flicker. “I guess it is kind of mesmerizing,” Myka says after some time.

“We haven’t spoken much,” Helena rejoins.

“There hasn’t been much to speak about.” Without peril, Myka adds, internally, and by that she means, peril to me.

“On the contrary. But I’ve tried to ignore it.”

“So have I. I hear it’s unhealthy.”

“Perhaps. It’s Pete’s strategy as well, according to him,” Helena says. Then, following a throat-clear, “With regard to his feelings for you.”

Myka doesn’t need to clear her throat. “He’s the one who told me it was unhealthy.” Which puts her in mind of his ostentatious cough: it’s meaningful now. Ridiculous, but meaningful.

“Then I suppose we’re ailing, all of us.”

“I suppose we are. An epidemic of ignorance.”

Helena smiles a little at that. Myka can’t help but smile back, and she maintains it as Helena asks, light, “What is the prognosis?”

“Depends on the ignoring’s end result,” Myka temporizes.

“Pete maintains that ignoring something long enough makes it go away.”

Or it kills you, Myka might say, like cancer. But instead she stays light. As light as she can. “Maybe he’s right. No, probably he’s right.” She owes him that.

Now a pause. A wait. What’s next? “So is that where we leave it?” Helena asks.

Maybe it goes away. Maybe that’s what’s next.

Myka can see it, now: see the spreadsheets dissolving into unnecessarity, see herself not responding physically to Helena, see Helena becoming, in essence, like Pete: someone with a past version of whom a past version of herself made a mistake.

She hadn’t imagined, not before this minute, that it was possible. But now a road leads there.

Can she take that road? She looks again into the fire. The not-fire. It mocks her: Everything you really want turns out to be unreal. On the other side of some facsimilating screen. A mirage. She turns away from it, ashamed. She looks at Helena... for the moment, Helena is still real. Still able to render Myka’s resistance from her body, here in this moment by sitting quietly and watching fake flames, in the next by doing nothing more than breathing out, breathing in.

Myka has not yet taken that awful road. Not yet. One more try, she tells herself. But no, that’s not right. She’s never really tried. Never really. She’s waited—longer than she thought she should—and she’s hoped—harder than she thought she could—but that wasn’t trying.

So: one try.

It can’t be the try she might have made in the past, a desperate just-please-touch-me push. Under the circumstances, that’s impossible. So, what?

An olive branch? No, peace isn’t the right aim, even now.

Better, perhaps: something she wouldn’t have said before tonight’s... encounter. Something related to tonight’s encounter, something more real than she’s offered so far: “We fought. Pete and I.”

TBC

[cloudyskydreams]

Yooo I really like that pregnancy ask and I wanted to suggest a what if! Pure angst and drama if you're up to it.

What if the pregnancy didn't go well near the end because S/O's magic is not very high (to begin with! monsters need both parents iirc to have a health about of magic to make a monster.) A couple of days after the baby bone is born, child protective services (the Canadian version of it.) have to take them to their father stating that the mother is in a coma and is unlikely to recover.

((What a way to start the day. Getting a knock on the door only to find a stranger hold a baby that they were so sure it wasn't theirs. AND their s/o is probably going to die because their SOUL magic was sucked up dry to make the baby. Said baby bones looks a bit unhealthy too because they developed without their pappa's magic and is weakly crying.))

((You can decide of s/o recovers or not.))

hhhhhh you guys need to be movie directors or something because the pure plot and drama being thrown at me recently.

S/O recovers because I like that route better having a free reign relationship with your child only to have the possibility of that taken away when your comatosed ex wakes up.

Holy fuck these turned out longer than I expected so I'm just doing 3 if you wanted a different character feel free to request again! Also the holidays are NOT being kind to me so my updates are probably gonna be wack as I deal with the shitshow I call a family hope you guys enjoy and happy holidays!

Undertale:

Sans: Sees the baby bones and kind of zones out as shock runs through his body. Then he hears the word coma and zones back in. "what?" he has them repeat their entire spiel and his soul stops for a second when he hears what happened. He hesitantly accepts the babybones and cradles him to his chest gently.He's not ready for any of this and his world is collapsing around him as he finishes the conversation with CPS. Once they're gone he takes the babybones inside and simply stares at him for a bit as he rocks him back in forth Infront of the door he hasn't moved two steps from. The baby is whining and looking at him is like looking at an exact replica of himself as a babybones. He takes a few deep breaths and chuckles which turn into a full body laugh which turn into sobs as he cradles the baby to his chest. Why didnt he trust you? He still loved you even though he was convinced you had cheated a part of him desperately hoping he was wrong but now that he knows he was it's devastating. He looks for monster food that would be suitable for a babybones hoping to soothe his cry's and get his bones looking healthier. The entire time he's shaking as he rummages through the cabinets. Finds something akin to applesauce and spoonfeeds the little guy. Goes out and picks up a bunch of stuff (good, toys,clothes ect.)when Papyrus gets home. The first night he can't sleep and simply stays awake watching the babybones all night. He vows he's going to be the best dad ever while staring at his baby boys sleeping face a rush of paternal protectiveness rushing over him. He does a good job at taking care of the baby as he has experience since he had to basically raise Papyrus. He visits you once and the guilt destroys him so badly he can't visit you again. It had been a few months when he received a call. Surprise surprise it's you on the other end having just woken up and wanting to see your child immediately. Sans is more than happy to comply and gets to the hospital as soon as he can with the baby who's looking much healthier. Hesitates outside the doorway as he cradles your guys son to his chest. Possibilities and what ifs running through his head as anxiety starts to simmer. When he enters the room you look so relieved and happy to see him which happily surprises him till he realizes you're probably excited to see your baby. He hands the child over and suddenly your crying, the baby's crying, he's crying, all of y'all crying. He apologizes profusely before you can say anything and says he should have believed you how wrong he was and how sorry he is you had to go through everything alone and his grateful he is to see you again. He understands if you don't forgive him but don't expect to be rid of him because he's absolutely sticking around in his son's life.

Edge:Honestly when he sees the child and hears what CPS has to say he thinks he's having a nightmare. He's dreamt of similar situations where your baby actually turned out to be his nothing quiet like this but it's similar enough he's really thinking he's still asleep. Takes the child and thanks the CPS people for their time before going back inside. Trys to soothe the baby's cry's and rocks him gently in his arms. Checks the clock to make sure he has enough time to get to his next appointment in the day and yeah he's got a good bit, wait.... you can't read time in your dreams. He looks back at the clock and gently sets the baby down on the couch as he does the equivalent of pinching himself. Fuck fuck wait he's not dreaming. A flood of cold numbers rushes over him as he remembers what CPS said... He gently scoops the baby back up and shelves his oncoming mental breakdown as he stares down at his son. When Red gets home Edge recruits him as a babysitter (his thought process being he raised me he can watch a baby for an hour or so (red was absolutely stressed tf out))as he runs out to grab supplies and sort himself out. By sort himself out I mean destroying a chunk of a forest with his magic to workout all his anger and devastation. He trys his best to take care of the babybones his brother surprisingly giving good advice every now and then while he figures out how to be a dad. He's extremely gentle with the child and speaks on the most soothing fatherly tone to the little baby. He visits you in the hospitals bi weekly leaving little messages of memorable moments with the baby and some pictures. A few months goes by and one day he receives a call. It's a very frantic you on the other end and he can't help the immense amount of relief he feels as he hears your voice begging him to see your child. He brings the babybones to the hospital and stays quiet as he watches you two cuddling. He doesn't speak up until you thank him for watching the babybones. Tells you there's nothing to thank him for he was doing his job as a father and then it's quiet for a bit more before he hesitantly approaches and bows his head. He apologizes for his actions, for not trusting you, for everything you had to deal with alone. He's not expecting you to forgive him he wouldn't forgive himself but he does want to be apart of the child's life and immediately says so making sure you're aware of his intentions. Most likely to take you to court for custody of you refuse to let him father his child.

Stretch:Was woken up by the knock and answered the door still half asleep. Hears the story, takes the kid, thanks them and closes the door. It takes him like five whole minutes until he's like wait what the fuck. Holds the baby Infront of him by the armpits and looks at his mini lookalike with horror. Holy fucking shit he was wrong? He's a dad?? YOU'RE IN A COMA?? He gets lightheaded for a second and sits down on the couch with the crying baby in his arms. He hesitantly rocks the babybones not really sure what he's doing and immediately calls Blue. He's shaking as he's on the phone with his brother who says he's on the way. When Blue gets there he shows Stretch which foods the baby can eat and how to care for it. Stretch appreciates the help and kind of throws himself into caring for the child instead of thinking about the fact you're in a coma. He's sleeping on a beanbag chair in the nursery and wakes up as soon as the baby starts crying. Every waking moment is spent caring and playing with the babybones. Sometimes late at night he thinks about you and everything he's lost and missed out on but you've given him the best gift he could have ever asked for, a son. He visits you in the hospital occasionally leaving your favorite flower and pictures of the baby he's taken. Surprise surprise a month later when he gets a call and you're alive desperate to see you're baby. He brings the child and is grateful to see you awake when he hands him over. He immediately apologizes he tells you how wonderful his son is and how much he loves him and begs you to let him be apart of the child's life. He understands if you don't want him back as much as he misses you he fucked up he wasn't there and you almost died because he wasn't. He just loves his kid man he will be there for him and you if you let him.

[psychoticallykind]

Jegumas Day Twenty-Five - Christmas Morning/Day

1,014 words

@noblehouseofgay

--------------------------------------------------------------

“Good morning, love.”

A warm hand rubbed circles into Regulus’s shoulder, gently bringing him to full consciousness.

Regulus blinked his eyes open to see James holding a tray and a cup of hot chocolate. “Jamie.”

“Yes, love.” James waited until he sat up to set the tray down. He kissed the top of Regulus’s head. “Blueberry pancakes, bacon, and a small omelette with all of your usual requests.”

The food looked amazing. Regulus tipped his head up to get a kiss, humming happily. “Thank you.”

“You’re always welcome,” James replied, smiling brightly. He moved around the bed and carefully got on, moving to wrap an arm around his fiance. “How are you feeling?”

Regulus leaned against him. “Good.” He put a bite of pancake in his mouth, moaning in appreciation. “Oh, I love you.”

James laughed. “I love you, too.” He kissed his cheek. “Merry Christmas.”

Regulus sighed, feeling a little anxious as he realized what day it was. “Merry Christmas.”

James hummed in sympathy, letting Regulus eat in relative quiet. Regulus appreciated it - he didn’t imagine the rest of the day would be anywhere near as calm as this.

It wasn’t that Regulus didn’t like Christmas. He did - mostly. He loved getting gifts for people and baking cookies with James and cuddling on the couch watching Christmas movies. He loved helping James decorate and listening to Christmas music.

But Christmas day was always a little bit stressful. Everything was crammed into Christmas day - they went to Sirius and Remus, and then Lily and Pandora, and then James’s parents house for dinner. It was a lot of driving and talking and Regulus was always completely exhausted halfway through.

But it was fine. He would smile and be happy and try his best to enjoy the chaos.

“So I did something,” James said quietly. “That you should know about.”

Regulus turned to look at him. “What?”

James looked just slightly anxious, which made Regulus a bit concerned. “Do you remember how Lily called yesterday, and she wanted to move the plans around a bit so that we could go to her house earlier and then Sirius’s later?”

Regulus felt his stomach flip at the idea of switching it up. It would mean more driving, and an earlier start - they’d have to leave really soon, actually. He frowned, hoping for some sort of miracle that didn’t mean he had to function before nine in the morning. “Yes.”

“Well, I sort of told her that it wasn’t possible,” James told him. “So we arranged for everyone to meet at a dinner party in a couple of days instead of our usual schedule.”

Regulus tried to process that. “A dinner party?” He felt a spike of panic. “We’re doing more?”

“No, no,” James assured him quickly. “No, I’m sorry - Reg, I told everyone that we weren’t driving today. Except for mum and dad, I told them that I wasn’t sure, and Mum said to let them know by lunchtime. It seemed like it was stressing you out, so I thought we just - well, I thought it might be better to just relax today.”

“We’re…not driving today,” Regulus repeated slowly. He bit down on his smile, trying to contain the pure relief. “We don’t have to drive everywhere and talk to everyone today?”

James shook his head. “Nope. We can stay home all day if you want, we don’t even have to visit my parents.”

“That’s,” Regulus shook his head, overwhelmed. “That’s - James.”

James smiled, taking in his reaction. “Good?”

“So good,” Regulus confirmed. He grinned, the tension melting from his frame as he dropped his fork and hugged James tightly. “Thank you, thank you, thank you. James, I love you. I love you so much.”

He pulled back, suddenly worried. “Wait, you’re okay with this, right? You’re not sad?”

“I’m thrilled,” James replied sincerely. He kissed Regulus’s forehead. “This is the most excited I’ve ever seen you for Christmas. I love it.”

“I didn’t mean to make you cancel everything,” Regulus said guiltily.

“You didn’t.” James shook his head. “You were lovely about everything. But you looked more and more anxious every time it was brought up, and I don’t want you to feel bad today. You deserve to have fun on Christmas.”

Regulus took a deep breath, almost in tears as he hugged James again. “Thank you.”

“Always,” James replied, squeezing him back. “I’d have done this years ago if I knew it stressed you out so much.”

“I’d have told you years ago if I realized I wouldn’t have to go through it every year.” Regulus blew out a long breath, looking forward to the rest of Christmas for the first time in years. “Maybe we can still go to your parents for dinner.”

James’s eyes lit up. “Yeah?”

Regulus nodded - he loved visiting James’s parents. And without everything else, it actually did sound like fun. Plus, he knew James loved to see them during the holidays. “I think it’ll be fun.”

“I’ll call after breakfast,” James said happily. He kissed Regulus’s cheek. “What do you want to do today? Movies, cookies, music, reading?”

“Can we -” Regulus faltered for a second, but James gave him a little nod, encouraging him. “Can we do all of that? Just - I just want to do the Christmas stuff. Just us.”

“Regulus,” James said softly. He pressed kisses to his shoulder, his neck, his cheek. “I love that idea. We can do everything, of course we can. Do you want to make gingerbread houses? We have the stuff for it - oh, and we can make little gingerbread people to go inside!”

Regulus laughed, nodding in agreement. “That sounds perfect.” He stopped James from kissing his cheek again, turning to get a real kiss.

They were both grinning too much for it to be much of a kiss, but it didn’t matter. They could keep kissing - they could do whatever they wanted today, just them.

Regulus had never truly disliked Christmas.

But until today, he’d never truly loved it.

[suprababka]

How you first met & how they asked you out on a first date (part 1)

Featuring:

• Saitama • Genos • Speed-o'-Sound Sonic

[Garou & Metal Bat & Amai Mask: part 2] [Flashy Flash & Zombieman & King: part 3]

A/N: Merry Christmas! Thank you everyone for reading what I do and supporting me, it means a lot. I always do my best to make you guys happy because I really appreciate all of you. As some of you can remember, I've already mentioned a few times my first post with headcanons, and here it is! Finally, after all this time, I can present it to you as a gift for Christmas!🎄💫🎊🎉

(I hope I didn't mess anything up, and I'm sorry for being a bit late! I really wanted to publish this post sooner but couldn't. We don't celebrate Christmas in my country btw) Unfortunately, I had to split up post into 3 parts :((( Alright, let's see if you guys like my headcanons! :) (I low-key cringe at them tbh)

And dear anons, who requested headcanons, do not worry! I remember about you and will post everything, I just wanted to have a logical "begining" for hcs, you know?

Thanks for all the likes, comments, reblogs and following me! I really appreciate your feedback and support, guys!🥰🫶

You can check my masterlist too see more of my other works.

Prepare for possible OOC!

(Sorry if there are any mistakes!)

And, most importantly, enjoy!!!

Both of you go to the same store, so yeah, you pass by each other pretty often

(Genos even starts thinking you stalk his sensei)

And one day there is a limited sale

You get to the shop just in time to see that the last napa cabbage on sale is left

You extend your hand to take it as you feel someone's arm grabbing the cabbage

... and of course it's a bald man who you frequently run into

You look into each other eyes, both hands on the poor vegetable

Spark, emotions, passion... a-a-and he goes away with the cabbage without a care in the world

(Alright, maybe with a care to buy everything before the sale ends)

The only thing you can do is to just hum disappointed and look at the back of the retreating man

And come to think that you romanticized every encounter with him!

When you finish grocery shopping and walk out of the store, you meet Saitama with bags full of goods

It seems he has been been waiting for something... or someone, for example, Demon Cyborg

Giving one last look at him and at the cabbage in his hands, you begin walking to your house

Suddenly you hear a man clearing his throat and a "Hey, you wanted the cabbage, didn't you? Sorry, I took the last one. Here, I splitted it in half so both you and me could have it."

You turn around and see him extending the part of the vegetable

"And maybe you can be my other half?"

You're surprised to hear these words and blink for a few moments, thinking you misheard him

Saitama stares at you right back with a poker face, so maybe it's a prank after all?

"Are you joking with me right now?"

In return Saitama blinks with surprised eyes and shakes his head, reassuring that he is serious

"Well, how about we learn each other's name first and then see how it goes?" you answer, smiling and taking the half of the cabbage

And that's how you find out Saitama's name and agree to a first date

You begin walking back to your house and can't help but turn around to glance at Saitama

Then you see two figures coming up to him... from the bush

(And there is a big bunch of napa cabbage in the bush?)

You immediately recognize Demon Cyborg and... King?! Or is it someone who looks like him?

Soon you hear men talking

"How did it go, sensei? Did my tactic with cabbage work?"

"Yeah, Saitama bro, tell us. I hope you used phrases from mang- phrases I recommended to you?"

Chuckling, you continue going back home to the sound of Saitama's irritated voice, "Huh? I don't even know what you're talking about! What are you two doing here?"

"Helping you with your love interest, Saitama-sensei!"

"I said I could do it by myself! And I did it!.. Wait, why is there a bunch of cabbage in the bush?"

"I bought all of this for you, master! With only one cabbage being left, the chance you would talk to Y/n were higher than-"

"Wait-wait-wait, how do you know her name?"

"I scanned her face and found a lot of information about her."

"Genos, you can't do that!"

"If it can help you, why not? For example, I noticed that Y/n always buys napa cabbage, so that's why we needed to buy most of them, except for one."

"Wait, we? King, were you in this from the very beginning?"

"Maybe?" *nervous giggling*

Yep, dating Saitama is definitely gonna be interesting

Bonus:

Saitama has a problem, besides not having a worthy opponent to show him an interesting fight

And this issue is... his emotionlessness

Of course he can feel something like irritation, disappointment, a pang of hope, ardor from gambling, etc.

But it's not something deep

So he is confused when he gets this weird feeling in his chest every time he sees you

And the fact that he remembers your face and recognizes you speaks volumes

He also starts to think of you from time to time

That's strange

Soon enough he realises that he likes you

And just accepts this rather calm

(thanks to his nonchalant demeanor)

He's also too lazy to think about dating someone, getting to know them, going out somewhere, spending his money on something...

Nah, it's not for him, so his feelings for you will fade away eventually

Spoiler: they won't, it only gets worse

Alright, so he should just walk up to you, ask you out, get rejected and go on with his life peacefully

Sounds like a plan

"So, Saitama, you're quite pensive today, what's on your mind?" King asks while kicking his friend's ass in a game

"Eh, there's just a girl that I like. I thought it was temporary, but I guess I was wrong. So yeah, I gotta ask her out."

King is both perplexed and shocked: is this really Saitama? Saitama who isn't wasn't looking for a relationship? And he acts like it's something usual?

Ah, it's Saitama, he is always cool as cucumber, right

"I see. So, how are you gonna talk to her? And who is she, by the way?"

"Well, I don't know her. We just keep running into each other. I will just go and ask her out. If she rejects me, then I'l just live on. If she agrees on going on a date, then I... I guess I will deal with it on the spot."

"Huh, in that case you should think about your words to impress her. Something like "It looks like destiny keeps bringing us together, huh?", or "I know we don't know each other, so why don't we fix that?", or "I keep running into you, I think it's because you're magnetic.", or..."

"I agree with King," Genos suddenly says, watching Saitama play videogames with the S-Class hero, "I also believe that lucky coincidences such as choosing one product, accidentally bumping into her, standing next to each other in line can increase the chance of success. Though, sensei, I know you don't need any of that, she should feel honoured to be considered as a romantic partner for you. If she is not, then she doesn't deserve you and isn't able to see your greatness, master."

"Yeah-yeah..." Saitama answers to both men

(he didn't listen to them)

So when he takes the cabbage right from your hands and hears your disappointed hum, he feels like a jerk (just a little bit)

But on the other hand, it means that you'll probably reject him and he can go back to his usual life, right?

In that case, he can't let the chance slide

While he is waiting for you to appear, he decides to apologize and give you the half of the cabbage after all

Maybe it will irritate you more and make you dislike him?

Oh, and in addition he should say something romantic-alike, so you'd definitely say no to him and he could continue his peaceful li-

You agree to go on a date with him

Oops, everything goes NOT according to the plan

But, surprisingly for Saitama, he doesn't feel sad or troubled with the outcome

On the contrary, he's excited and feels like it's easier for him to breath now

Wow, it's something new

And strange, but in a good way

Genos is always busy with Saitama or away on missions, at S-Class hero meeteings, at Dr. Kuseno's place, etc.

So he doesn't have time to date, not that he's interested in it, getting stronger and taking revenge on The Mad Cyborg is his top priority!

(Saitama and Dr. Kuseno are his top priority too of course)

Though, you unintentionally managed to catch his eye

How? Genos doesn't know

Once he just noticed you feeding a stray cat when he was going to Saitama's place

After that he started seeing you there again, again and again

Until one day he decides to walk up to you

Why? Genos doesn't know

And he just stands there, staring at you and the stray cat

You glance up to him and can't help but feel intimidated by Demon Cyborg

"Uh, excuse me, can I help you?" your voice comes out like a begging for mercy

He looks straight into your eyes

Even though his gaze is intense, you feel yourself getting lost in his eyes (as cheesy as it sounds)

There is something capturing about them, they are so cold yet so humane

"No, I just noticed that you regularly feed this cat," suddenly the young man speaks

"Ah, yeah, I do," you answer, breaking eye contact and returning your attention back to the cat, "Isn't he cute?"

All what you get in return is a simple "Yeah"

The S-class hero definitely wants to hear more of you

Why? Genos doesn't know

How can he continue your conversation without asking stupid questions? Or what if you want him to back off? Why does he care about any of this, anyway?

Young man catches himself overthinking for a first time in a long time

(silly boy doesn't understand that he always overthinks everything, especially anything related to his sensei)

Genos comes back to real life when you stand up, say goodbye to him and go… wherever you have to

He stands there, processing what just happened and deciding that there are some things that matter more than this

After a minute he walks away to Saitama's place

If only could he understand how wrong he was, not realising that it was far more than just a simple conversation

Because Genos starts seeking for any opportunities to run into you, to talk to you again, making your conversations longer and longer (and he is successful in this)

Even Saitama notices it and start teasing him about his crush

Genos denies it of course

But sensei doesn't believe his student and points out to young boy's attraction

(Saitama is desperate to get Genos spend his time somewhere else, besides his home)

"Just go on a date with her and see how it goes. If both of you don't enjoy it, then I guess I was wrong. But if everything goes well, why not take your chance? It's not like you will lose anything... Well, except for money."

"Sensei, I... I must write it down!"

In all seriousness, Genos listens to Saitama's advice and decides to go for it

The next day after this conversation he spots you feeding the stray cat yet again

When he walks up to you, he notices that you didn't have much to offer

"Ah, sorry, sweetie, I thought there was more leftover food in the package... Don't worry, I'll buy the new one and give you more food next time, okay?" you talk to cat, petting him

"Then it's a good thing I brought some… just in case," suddenly you hear man's voice and immediately recognise it

"Ah, Genos! It's good to see you again."

"Likewise, Y/n-san," he answers, feeding the cat

(and the corners of his lips are slightly raised??)

"Going to your sensei's place, huh?"

"Actually, no," he stands up, looking at you seriously, "I wanted to know if you would like to spend some time with me."

"You mean now?"

"Not necessary, I would like to book one evening with you to get to know you better."

"Can I clarify something first?"

"Of course, what is it, Y/n-san?"

"Are you inviting me on a date? Sorry for being straightforward, I just want to know your intentions."

Genos.exe stopped working

Really, your question leaves him dumbfounded

Why is he like this? Genos doesn't know because he always finds reasoning for everything

Well, looks like everything besides this

"To be honest, Y/n-san, I want to understand my feelings towards you and I believe learning more about you will help me with that."

As for you, you are perfectly aware of your fondness towards young man

And of course you agree to a date-not-date with him

(on which Genos realises he actually likes you)

Bonus:

"Are you really going to just sit here and glare at me?" after losing another round in some PSP game, Saitama looks up from the screen and sees a young boy who has been attentively watching his sensei for… the past two hours

"Yes, I need to document your every movement, sensei."

"But not when I'm just playing. It's useless."

"I wouldn't say so..."

"Don't you have some better things to do? I don't know, go to some meetings or... flirting with that girl... or whatever."

"Flirting with a girl?"

"Yeah, the one who feeds the cat."

"You got it wrong, sensei. I'm not romantically interested in Y/n-san."

"Ah-huh, sure. You totally don't look at her when we pass by with hearts in your eyes."

"I physically can't have hearts in my eyes."

"Figuratively. Just admit it, she caught your attention. You don't pay attention to others. So it means something, doesn't it?"

"Sensei..."

Seeing confusion on his student's face, Saitama immediately feels a glimmer of hope that Genos will start spending his time somewhere else because of... certain "Y/n-san"

"Just go on a date with her and see how it goes. If both of you don't enjoy it, then I guess I was wrong. But if everything goes well, why not take your chance? It's not like you will lose anything... Well, except for money."

"Sensei, I... I must write it down!"

"No, that's not what you should do..."

"To be honest, master Saitama, I think you are right. I have underestimated the effect that Y/n-san has on me, so I agree that I need to get to know her better. Thank you, sensei."

"Uh, well, no problem... but you didn't have to bow."

The next day Genos spends on throughly planning asking you out

(yeah, he likes to think everything through)

So, we all know that Sonic lives in the forest

And he has a special place with a lake and waterfalls where he likes to spend his time and think about... well, everything

Escape reality, you know?

Sonic even believes that he's the only one who knows about this magical spot

Just imagine his face when one day after the intense training he goes there and sees someone in the lake

Disappointed, he decides to make an exception and leave this person alone

Soon he'll come back and his spot will be free, right?

Well, yeah, but...

This keeps happening every time he tries to unwind under intense waterfall pressure

Of course Sonic sees this as competition

He needs to complete his training faster and reach the lake before this person appears? You are on!

And he manages to do that

Proud of himself, he relaxes under streams of waterfall

But there is one thing Sonic didn't think through: you weren't aware of your competition

So, you go to the lake to spend your time here as usual

(you don't notice a young man sitting on the rock in the waterfall)

You unpack your things, lay a blanket and get undressed, staying only in a swimsuit

Suddenly you manage to barely notice something or someone moving in the bushes

Soon you realize it was a man

Not wasting your time on thinking, you immediately grab your stuff and start running away

Your heart starts beating even faster when you hear him calling you and chasing after you

It gets even scarier when you catch a glimpse of this man chaotically jumping from a tree to tree with unbelievable speed

You keep running until you bump into something and fall

Rubbing your bruised area, you open your eyes and see the same young man in front of you

And he is... naked???

"Aaaaah! Don't touch me!" you scream, crawling away from him and throwing tiny sticks at him

"Hey, stop doing that!' Sonic brushes off all of your attempts to defend yourself, "I won the competition and came here first, so it's my turn to spend time here!"

"What?"

"You heard me. You were at MY lake every time I came there! So I took it as a competition and today I won! I came here first!"

"Your lake? There is no sign saying it's a private property! Since when it's your lake?!"

"I discovered it first."

"What's not how it works!"

"Whatever. I came here first, so I have every right to be there alone."

"And I have every right to be there too! Since it's a public place in the forest!"

"But I left you alone every time you were here!"

"Well, you didn't have to! Or you could put something on, you know!.. Wait, "every time"?.. You were watching me? Pervert!!!"

"What? No! I went back to my place!"

"... Just cover yourself already!" you find your blanket and throw it at him

Taking your blanket, Sonic wraps it around his waist

"Listen, man, if you don't want me coming here, just say it and let me go. I don't want any trouble..." you stand up and wipe away all all the dirt

He is about to exclaim, agreeing with the condition, but... he examines you and your body

You are... rather cute... beautiful... lovely!

Suddenly the thought of never seeing you again makes him sad

"N-no, it's not like that..." he whispers, looking away and trying not to blush

(he miserably fails to cover the pink colour on his cheeks)

"J-just... Uh.."

Why does he feel nervous suddenly?

Meanwhile you stare at him, taking in his every feature

He has beautiful loose wet hair and a sporty body which is covered in scars and in drops

And his face is so cute!

But let's not judge a book by its cover, right?

"You can come here whenever you want to..." Sonic finally speaks

"... Thanks? But isn't it the opposite of what you wanted?"

He's silent for a moment, "It doesn't matter. I just want not to be disturbed. That's all."

"I can understand that. Well, how about we just distribute the time according to which we will spend time on the lake?" you try to find a solution to the problem

"... Yeah, that makes sense. But maybe, uh... Youcangivemeyournumber so we could inform each other?"

"Ah, what did you say?"

"I said... Let's exchange our phone numbers?"

"Good idea, it's more reasonable than what I suggested."

And just like that Sonic dictates his number to you, says goodbye and runs away, disappearing in the woods

"Uh, wait! My blanket..."

But it's too late, he's nowhere to be seen

(don't worry, he returns it next time you see each other)

You'd think that this is how your relationship develops: quick meeting and texts turn into long ones

But Sonic is faster than that

So he awkwardly asks you out a couple days after this… "incident"

Of course you say yes, why not?

(or should I say "who wouldn't?")

Bonus:

For the rest of day Sonic isn't himself

His thoughts always come back to you, to your sweet voice, to your cute face, to your capturing eyes, to your alluring lips that he badly wants to ki-

Wait, what?

He is Speed-o'-Sound Sonic, the fastest and the most skilled ninja in the world!

So why does he feel like this?

Why he wishes you'd be here with him and watch how he trains?

Why he wants to amaze you?

Why he smiles like an idiot re-reading your sms "Hey, it's Y/n :)"?

Why he wants you to text him more? To be with him under a waterfall? To show him your kindness again? To spend more time with you?

Why he craves your presence and attention so damn much?

These thoughts live rent free in his mind 24/7

He even dreams about you!

The next day it gets worse

He feels like he's a obsessed maniac

(poor guy just wanted to interact with someone and be accepted as a normal person: he doesn't realize how lonely he is)

And maybe he has a crush on you?

Nooooooo, he can't have someone something distracting him now, can he?

...

In the end of day (literally) he admits his feelings for you

However, he can't just confess to you straight away, right?

He needs to take steps

For example, he should start by asking you out first

But how?

Should he casually suggest spending time together?

Or maybe just send you a text?

Or leave a note somewhere?

Or maybe he should show you some of his tricks and wow you that way?

Well, considering how you tried to run away from him... it might be not the best idea

And since he wants to talk to you in person, then the only option left is to have a conversation with you and ask you out

Now he has another problem: what should he say?

"Go out with me."

No

"I thought it'd be great to spend some time together one evening. What do you say?"

No

"Heeeeey, watcha doin', girl? Wanna hang out with me?"

No

"Y/n, I know I came off as someone weird or creepy, but I promise I'm not. Our first meeting wasn't quite what you would call normal, but maybe let's change that?"

Nope, but he's onto something

"Hey, I'm not a pervert and want to go on a date with you. How does that sound?"

No

Ugh, why is it so hard to come up with anything good?

Maybe he should just go with the flow and the right words will find their way?

Yeah, sounds like a plan

(little he knows he's gonna mess everything up)

When it's time for him to approach you and start a conservation, he feels like he's going to puke from nervousness

But it's too late to back out

"Hey, Sonic! How was the training?"

"Hey... Uh, good. And you?"

(he was thinking about asking you out instead of training)

"Me too, the weather is nice and the water is warm."

"G-good to know..."

"Alright, see you around, Sonic!" you wave him goodbye, starting to go away

"W-wait!" he suddenly exclaims, pointing at you... and blushing?

"Huh? What is it?" you stop, turning to him

"I... I... I'm not a pervert!"

"O-okay, glad to know so? I mean, I kinda figured that out, despite, well, you know what..."

"But I want to- Around you I- What about-"

"What?'

Taking a deep breath, he finally asks, "Do you remember how we first met?'

"Of course, it was just two days ago..."

"Let's repeat that!"

"Whaaa- No, let's not!"

"I mean... Let's, uh, start over?"

"What exactly do you mean by that?"

Feeling embarrassed, he sighs, "I want to take you out..."

"Eeeeh? So what's why you have a katana? To kill me?! Please, don't..."

"What? No! I wanted to know if you'd like to go on a date with me... But I guess I messed up... So forget it."

"That's a shame, because I'd like to spend some time with you."

"Really?!"

"Yep."

"You're not joking?"

"Nope, I'm not. Well, unless you are."

You can tell by Sonic's facial expression he didn't expect such turn of events

"I'm serious! I'll send you the information!"

"Okay!" you smile, giving him thumb up

"Bye!" after saying that, he disappears

"Bye?.." you say to nothing (again)

Though, you kinda feel relieved to be left alone since you need to calm your racing heart down and stop yourself from jumping out of happiness

As for Sonic, he spends a lot of time, trying to calm down and reassure himself that his dream wish came true and he's not dreaming

(yeah, Sonic is a blushing mess around you)