#i used to love making characters that went against the chantry

[tevinter]

is this anything.

[utilitycaster]

To elaborate on this post specifically with regards to Worlds Beyond Number, well, Suvi says it all, really:

They love being on my tab, they love having fun, they love being protected by me, but they never listen to me and they don't care.

Because here is the thing. Suvi is of the Citadel, which is part of the Empire. We do not have a full understanding of the geopolitical system but as a rule an empire is participating in conquest; sometimes two empires both exist and attack each other and so the exact scenario gets very gray and complicated but I think we do all agree the Empire is not great.

Suvi is of the Citadel. She holds a position of great privilege within the Citadel. This is in part because her parents were, as far as we know, betrayed and murdered by an enemy of the Citadel (having themselves been, again, based on what we know, reformers and rule-breakers as well as extremely capable spies) and she was adopted by one of their closest friends, who became the Sword of the Citadel.

She is not the Citadel. She is a 20-year old who was primarily raised within it, with all of the above complications of her parents. She is not single-handedly responsible for every action the citadel takes. She is not personally trying to stop Ame or Eursulon, only saying that there will be consequences if they leave. Consequences that she has experienced after Ame ran into the kudzu and Eursulon went after Naram and they all attempted to break Ame's curse; consequences she knows will become more and more dire if she continues to disobey Steel, particularly a direct order; consequences that already resulted in Ame being in a coma for a month. (The court-martial, I will say, is entirely on Suvi; the rest is not).

And in all of those situations: Ame and Eursulon were, as Suvi says, happy to have Suvi's purse pay for room and board, and her wizard's staff open doors, and to be put up and fed at the Chantry, and take the skyships, and train at the Citadel and have a marvelous time there. It's been several days and they could have left sooner, and they didn't. It's very "no ethical consumption under capitalism, which means that I can do whatever I want" rather than like, attempting to make slightly less harmful choices from Ame and Eursulon. Their choices aren't coming from a principled stance against the Citadel and Empire; they are coming from a "well, thanks for all the fun and the safe place to stay and the resources for research but you told me not to do something I wanted to do and I won't wait an hour to try and see if we can come to a solution that works for everyone."

For that matter, they're making these choices in part because of what a wizard of the citadel is saying to them; and yet Suvi's presence was said by that very wizard to be crucial to Ame's survival, and they're still not waiting.

[stepping outside of all of the above and the below: I think all the actions being taken, as a listener, are fucking great because this is D&D and conflict is fun and also all of these characters are like, the equivalent of 20 years old and level 2; this is not me saying Suvi is right and Ame and Eursulon are wrong. Rather, Suvi is no less right or wrong than the others, and she is extremely justified in feeling hurt and angry and that her friends are willing to take and not give.]

Something I've found in a lot of sf stories but especially actual play is a pretty strong and frankly, weird bias within the fandom of exactly this nature, as the linked post said. Someone affiliated with an empire or a power is somehow, as an individual, responsible for every harmful action that power commits. They're brainwashed. They're evil. They don't get it. They just need to come around to the right mentality. And that right mentality is, of course, that of the good rural person with nature magic. They are a leader within their small community and hold an immense amount of power over them - and perhaps beyond - but don't worry, they use it correctly. They're wise and they're right about everything.

Except they're not. They are frequently either idealistic to the point of ignoring the realities of the situation, or very limited in their viewpoint, or do not realize the immense privilege of being in their position as both a person in nigh absolute benevolent power within a small domain and also the only person with that power. Those wise, provincial, nature-based characters rarely understand that to exist within a complex and yes, extremely flawed and even ill-intentioned system like the Citadel is to be, even as a person with privilege within that hierarchy, a cog.

Suvi cannot just leave. She exists within a vast system and she is not stupid or brainwashed for acknowledging the realities of it. I think that yes, a very possible path forward for her is one in which she grows to question the Citadel's practices. I also think that to treat her as the embodiment of this entire empire, or to expect that her only way to be a good person is via a sudden about-face at the cost of everything she has, when she is a level 2 apprentic, is not just overly simplistic but flat-out incorrect. And I think that to assume Ame is objectively correct for not waiting a very brief amount of time for Steel (when, in fact, one could argue she should have left immediately upon being contacted; she had been absent from her duties for months already) is similarly oversimplifying to the point where one's conclusions are no longer useful.

Recall that witches' familiars are said to embody the traits within them that, to be an effective steward of their position, they often must set aside. Ame has been letting hers lead her.

[baodurs]

🤥🎂🌙🌋🙉❇️🌠 - for either... or both :o

oc emoji asks

🤥 LYING - are they good liars? do they have tells to show they're lying?

my first instinct for phaedra was to say yes she's a good liar, but i'm not so sure... she's a good speaker, very poised, and good at keeping secrets & dealing with people, but i think outright lying could make her uncomfortable enough to be kind of obvious! i guess it depends on the situation and if she feels guilty. she's a competent utilitarian liar, but she's not good at prolonged deception or lying to people she knows well. if she ever tried it, she'd hesitate and just seem distressed lol

morven doesn't see much point in lying. she's usually blunt and direct (red hawke); when she does want to hide something, she's more likely to just be like "none of your business" or "i'm not telling you." beyond thinking it's usually a waste of time, she doesn't have any qualms with it, and she's a good liar when necessary. usually in the form of denying something when directly questioned—she's good at sounding dismissive or making someone feel foolish enough for asking/stonewalling them long enough that they just drop it

🎂 BIRTHDAY CAKE - when is their birthday? do they like celebrating it?

fictional calendars scare me i haven't thought much about it... but i think this thedas astrology doc is fun! using that, i'd say phaedra was born under eluvia* and morven was born under fervenial*

*assuming i just went for the most obviously fitting ones. but who knows!

phaedra looks forward to her birthday! as much as she is dutiful and self-effacing, she's always been more proud and less satisfied with her role than she wants to be, so she enjoys having a day where the weight of that lightens a bit and she can indulge in those "lesser" emotions. the key is that it's a limited (one day) and sanctioned (literally her birthday!!) form of indulgence, so she lets herself enjoy it

morven prefers to treat it like any other day. being celebrated is uncomfortable for her (if it's sincere, then it's awkward; if it's insincere, then it's annoying), but she rarely does anything big anyway. she likes her birthday as far as she can use it as an excuse to gather her family and friends together!

🌙 MOON - what is your oc's greatest wish? how far are they willing to go for it?

phaedra: her deepest desires are an inscrutable mess i fear. but the clearest and most present one is just to do right by the wardens. and she'll go very far for it! she wants them to have power and respect and she wants to be a good commander. and a good warden, really, but she struggles more with what that means.

morven: just some peace and fucking quiet to be honest!!! she has never dreamed very big. but clearly she's only willing to go so far for it, considering her entire life. she won't sacrifice much for a cause or for the greater good (she's vehemently against the circle and the chantry but too afraid of the consequences for herself and those close to her to do much about it), but she'll do anything for a person she loves

🌋 VOLCANO - how bad is their temper? is it a slow boil, or a instant explosion?

phaedra isn't a very angry character IMO. she feels a lot of frustration or resentment, but true anger is rare for her and fades pretty quickly. so losing her temper is a surprise to her and to others when it happens; she'll just seem the usual level of cold or serious until she lashes out very suddenly and then almost immediately regrets it and tries to save face

comparatively, morven is a generally angrier person with a much longer temper. it's a more familiar and useful emotion to her. i think seeing her lose her temper is also surprising but in a different way—less "where did that come from" and more "i guess i should have seen this coming but i didn't realize where the tipping point was"

🙉 HEAR-NO-EVIL - what is the worse thing your oc could hear from someone?

phaedra: that she's selfish. as a cousland, she struggled with her own ambition vs what was actually expected of her, and as a warden, she struggles with what is necessary vs what feels unacceptable (either to her the cousland that still lives in her brain!). it's her duty to her family vs her duty to the wardens vs her duty to ferelden vs her idealized sense of honor, and for someone to tell her that her own ambition or desires still won out over all of that would be worse than anything else they could say.

morven: that she's not doing enough or hasn't done enough... i think a lot about this act 1 conversation with carver:

hawke: you will not use [bethany] against me like that! she deserves better. carver: then you should have given better. hawke: i gave everything! question me, mother, yourself, but not that.

and that's really just it IMO! she's willing to accept when she's failed, but not that she still didn't give everything she could have. she wants to be malcolm, and on some level her failures become proof to her that she's not and that he was different or better, which is not Great but is something that confirms her worldview and the way she sees her father. like, if there's a flaw, then let it be with Her (and thus not with malcolm) and not with her efforts. this maybe makes her sound more fatalist than she actually is but what can you do

❇️ SPARKLE - what is their most prized possession? what do they value?

phaedra: is it passé to say the reflection amulet from the temple of sacred ashes... i think she tries to honor the idea that when you're a warden, your old life doesn't matter anymore, so she doesn't hold onto much from her origin. but this is something that reminds her of home that she got after leaving it behind, and she has a reverence for spirits, so she appreciates whatever gave it to her.

morven: having too many Things makes morven nervous, so she values things that are useful and don't feel like they're taking up space. a decent candidate for a prized possession would be something like malcolm's grimoire. (i apologize for how many of her answers are about malcolm.) but idk let's just say that for now bc i can't think of something better on the spot!

🌠 SHOOTING STAR - if they could make any wish with no repercussions, what wish would they make?

i think if someone made this offer to phaedra, she might just reject it lol... she's an envious character who wants a lot of things she can't have, but she also thinks she wasn't meant for those things/doesn't have them for a reason. it would feel wrong for her to wish them into existence (just wishing for a cure to the blight, for example, would feel to her like an insult to the wardens). she might pass the wish onto a loved one if possible <3 if she absolutely had to do it, she'd wish for something incredibly minor and practical like "i wish for mild weather on my next trip to the city" lmao

morven... hm. i think a lot of things would occur to her, and it would depend on when the offer was presented. she is not used to thinking big picture or hoping for things out of reach, so most of her wishes would be about safety/security for herself or friends. post-da2 morven is the only one who would entertain something big. first thought would be to cure carver of the blight, but i don't think she'd actually wish for it. i think she'd wish for one last conversation with malcolm, especially after legacy, bc that lack of closure is the one thing that will eat her alive until she's dead!!!!

[loquaciousquark]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E111 (Sept. 29, 2020)

@eponymous-rose‘s internet is out tonight, so I’m here late and without coffee! Let’s see how many typos we can fit into an hour and a half episode.

Tonight’s guests: Ashley Williams JOHNSON, oops!! & Liam O’Brien!

We open with Brian in light-up vented sunglasses and Henry at his side, as always. Dani is very excited to be back and has fun-buns in her hair tonight. So cute! Everyone talks about how much they’re Zooming these days for work, and Liam mentions he and Matt & Marisha did a digital cocktail night. He and Dani arrange on camera to have a distanced, masked meetup in the park so Dani can see Liam’s dog again.

No announcements! Tonight, we’re discussin’ episodes 110 and 111.

Starting with the end, Brian jumps right to it by asking how they feel that Molly is alive. Liam 100% thought we’d be back to him, but still wasn’t ready when it happened. Caleb doubted he was alive. Both Liam & Ashley marvel at the numerology that keeps cropping up throughout the show. Brian hates not being able to see it at the same time the show happens live; Ashley was biting her tongue not telling him spoilers. (He doesn’t want to hear spoilers unless Yasha dies so he can be there for Ashley if needed.) Brian says he has a little reality trauma from the night Pike died in the pre-stream game; it was the first time he’d realized how much it affected the players.

Ashley’s realized how much she misses unpacking the game with Brian when they get home. She just has to sit with it until everyone else gets to see it. Brian: “Instead she comes home and I have to fill her in on the Real Housewives of Amarillo, Texas.”

Reunion dinner with Trent! Liam talks about how the way things unfolded with Trent is not at all how he imagined it in his pre-game creation; he’d expected more of a fracas, more of an unexpected clash. “Caleb might have been a different person if he’d run into these people earlier in the story. The M9 changed him before [Trent & co] came back and got to him.” He’d imagined Astrid & Eodwulf to be complicated encounters, but says what Matt’s designed has been even harder than that. A fight on a mountain is one thing, but walking into a room with “what Trent dropped, is impossible to cope with.” It also means that if what Trent said is true, anything Caleb does now is effectively of Trent’s design, even killing him.

He doesn’t think Caleb would have gone anywhere near Trent & co without the M9. “The Mighty Nein--it took a long time--but they cracked Caleb open like a walnut.”

He thinks what Matt has done is much more murky than the simplicity of murder, such as the Briarwood arc. He can’t just exact his revenge now.

Liam says that the tempation to tinker with time is no longer as all-consuming as it was. He might still be tempted if Matt dangles a bunch of carrots in front of him, but he thinks that now it might be better to make sure that that kind of thing doesn’t happen anymore for anyone else (!!!). “It’s still a nugget in his brain and it’s still possible he could be tempted by the drug, but what he wanted in the beginning was entirely selfish, but now that the M9 are involved he owes it to them, to the people of the country, even on the Dynasty side--is so complex that if Caleb were to get that carrot and chase it, he would be risking everything.”

Ashley agrees that most of their choices are no longer black and white. Many of the situations feel more like real life. Liam agrees and says he’ll sometimes make decisions that he’s both really happy with and regrets at the same time. They both look forward to what Matt will reveal in Act 3.

Brian feels it’s tough to gauge how deep they are into what Matt’s planned for the campaign. Liam says that thanks to Matt’s skill, he really doesn’t know what Caleb wants right now.

Ashley agrees, and talks about how she created Yasha to have more to overcome than Pike. She loves what Matt’s doing in terms of allowing each of them to overcome more emotional hurdles than physical ones in this campaign.

Going back to Molly’s grave was very exciting for Ashley since she wasn’t able to be there when he died in the game & wanted to do what she could to honor him. Yasha, however, was very hesitant but knew what needed to be done. She’s not very open with her emotions, but both she & Ashley were stressed. They all could feel the energy in the studio & knew Matt was about to do something mind-blowing. Liam: “You could feel all the dust in the air coalescing around Taliesin.”

Brian trips over Eodwulf. Liam tries to help him find some pronunciation shortcuts. Ashley: “You say it so beautifully.” Brian: “Thank you.” Ashley: “Not you.”

Caleb knows how wickedly intelligent & ambitious Astrid is, and was heartened by the wavering he saw in her at the dinner. However, he can’t trust her until he knows why she’s where she is.

He really feels that if they’d had this dinner 60 episodes ago, Caleb might have tilted back along the evil axis and he would have had to retire the character. He had a playlist entirely for if Caleb turned evil and left the party.

The vision of Zuala was a huge deal for Yasha, even along every other instance she’s had of being mind-controlled, etc. “That’s guilt I think she will always carry with her, but at least she’s starting to forgive herself.” Losing the chains, sprouting wings again--Ashley reiterates that she didn’t know that was even a possibility, she just picked the skeletal wings because they were dope--were huge moments in the character development. Ashley’s glad Beau was there at the moment of the first flight; Ashley thinks of the quotation “Happiness is only beautiful when it’s shared,” and because Yasha tends to keep things very much to herself, having someone there to share it made it more impactful. “That was a cool moment. There’s been a lot of healing for Yasha these last episodes.”d

Ashley also says sometimes in that moment, when all eyes are on you in a one-on-one with Matt, everything goes muffled like Saving Private Ryan. “Wub wub wub.”

Dani feels that the only way she could even have the conversation with Zuala was to let her go in the first place.

Liam thinks one of the things that Yasha & Cad share is that still waters run deep. He loves how much Yasha hangs back sometimes, only to then reveal some new moment like the fighting pit. Apparently Ashley also has a knife collection, and uses that metal side of herself when she wants to let that new side of Yasha show.

Cosplay of the Week: Crystal Armstead (@riyuski on twitter) in a Reani cosplay. Beautiful!

How does Liam feel about the return to Rexxentrum? Very, very complicated. Caleb loves magic and lights up when he sees it, which is wrapped in the Soltryce Academy; he brought folks to the dance hall for the same reason, which was wanting the M9 to see the things that he loved about the city.

Yasha felt the same way about visiting the Chantry of the Dawn. It was a memory of a very traumatic moment (almost killing Beau), but given everything that’s happened between then and now it was cathartic to see again. There’s been a lot of healing in the past few weeks. It also felt like a physical representation of Yasha’s growth, the last time she was controlled against her will like that (or at least, until she was mind-controlled by Vokodo. Ashley sighs, aggrieved.)

Brian: “The tower really feels like a love letter from Caleb to his friends.” Liam: “It is, and a love letter from Liam to his friends.” When he looked at Caleb’s spell list, he remembered how amazing the mansion was in Campaign One and how many role-playing moments it led to and knew he wanted to incorporate it. However, he knew it could never be the same as Scanlan’s mansion because Caleb doesn’t have the same improvisational genius as Scanlan does. Liam has been “tinkering with this machine” for over a year, waiting for the moment to reveal it. He loves that he got a chance to see Jester’s room in time to have her tower room reflect reality. He’d discussed the tower extensively with Dani & Matt. Brian: “Hey! What am I, chopped--what’s the saying?” Ashley: “Chopped cabbage?”

Ashley marvels at the design of the dome. Liam talks about how Caleb knowing Caleb has been abused has been slowly getting better, but he also loves now being able to juxtapose that healing with his innate love of magic and how beautiful he finds it, how he loves to use magic as his artistry. The Soltryce Academy wasn’t “Welcome to DEATH SCHOOL,” it was the Sorbonne. It was amazing, everything he wanted. It was only one bad apple within that recruited him and turned it all bad.

Liam also points out how much it means in real life to be able to express his love and care for his friends in person too.

Ashley talks about how much she loves Yasha’s armor in a meta sense because it’s so cool and useful, and great for her armor class, but struggles with what it represents in game. She might not be able to let it go due to its sheer utility, and she may have to find an in-game reason to justify keeping it.

Ashley segues a moment into talking about her velvet top which apparently has a matching velvet scrunchie. She’s asked to demonstrate the scrunchie and ties her hair up in a way that I have never in my life seen someone do with a scrunchie before, and my hair’s been waist-length most of my life. I watch it again in slow motion. How did she DO that??

Caleb’s been looking for the right time to tell Jester about his past for a long time. She’s a good person and makes him feel like he might be capable of becoming a good person at the end, because that’s how she saw him. Liam knew from Laura that Jester wouldn’t condemn him, but Caleb put it off as long as possible. He also wanted to take the time to make sure Caduceus & Yasha knew the whole story too before they went to dinner with Trent.

Liam was also relieved to get it out, because he could never remember who knew and who didn’t, and now he doesn’t have to track it anymore. “Now we can move forward. Now we can heal wounds, maybe.”

Ashley feels Cad picks up a lot, more than most people realize. Yasha was really affected by Cad’s line: “Patience can be good, but it can lead to apathy.” She really feels it opened her eyes, and she appreciated the simplicity of him pointing out her hair’s growing back white again. Having a friend notice “hey, you’re changing for the better” really means a lot. She’s interested in seeing how this means things might change with Beau.

Dani points out that it also reinforced for Yasha that she can want things too--she can be patient and just continue to be with the group, as she’s wanted, but it’s okay to want more than that too. Ashley remembers Veth asking her what her purpose is. There’s a part of her that knows Yasha is still figuring that out, and she’s interested to see how Yasha will continue to change. She’s always spent her life serving somebody--the Sky Spear, Obann--and then even after she joined the M9, it was very centered on “what do you need, what does the group need, how can I help with our next job?” She’s going to have to take some time to figure out what she wants.

Fanart of the Week! Lovely Yasha & Beau flight art by @JMNP7888. The wings look amazing!

Brian: “One of the things we want to talk to you about, Liam, is about the Vokodo fight and the FUCKING disintegrate spell.”

Liam: “That was one of the most insane 60-90 seconds of gameplay that ever existed for the table, and definitely for me, in the entire history of the show. A lot of people think I just went, oh man, just bet it all on black. But what if I told you that...I Larkin’d the first 20 seconds of that fight and then at a quarter to midnight, I forgot that the reflection was a thing? I just forgot it was a thing! I spent that whole battle thinking I’m just here to banish things. I might buff my friends a little bit, maybe I’ll counterspell, but I’m just here to banish. And it didn’t work and it didn’t work and then it did! Finally it did and Jester made it work and then he was GONE. And then everyone got greedy and it was done but we brought him BACK. And it was a quarter to midnight and I’m not an animatronic D&D lesson machine, I’m just a guy playing D&D at 11:45 at night, and he came back and everyone started Goodfellas circling him and kicking him, and Beau & Yasha are gonna kill him, and then it’s my turn? Disintegrate! And then the room was quiet, and then time passed, and Matt asked, you really cast Disintegrate? And I said yes, of course, and Matt started rolling dice, and in the back of my head I started wondering why he asked if I was rolling Disintegrate. Oh no. In the back of my brain, I was like, well, just tell him that’s not what you did. Tell him you didn’t remember the reflection thing. But he’s already rolling dice! You can’t take it back now. Hold on a second. I’m going to take you on the journey I went through. I was thinking: you have a spell save of 17. This thing wasn’t that fast. +1, +2, maybe? Anything under 14 is okay. That’s 70%. 70%. That’s okay, right? And still no one said anything to tip me off that I was in ELDRITCH MADNESS at that point, no one said anything about the reflection! And then I realize it can reflect back on us, and I realize this is...disintegrate. And then I started becoming morbidly, macabre-ly fascinated at the puppet dance of death I had created. Well, this is a mess. I have made a mess. Let’s just sit in it. And somehow, nonsensically, spectacularly, it worked out in my favor. I went home that night and I got in bed next to my wife, who was fast asleep, and I stared at the ceiling going, dude. Duuuuuuuude. Duuuuuuuuuude.”

He apparently also told his therapist about this and how terrible it was and how close he “danced myself to the precipice like a crazy person!” Marisha (as told by Liam): “Epic roll, though.”

Matt told Liam that night that if it had been reflected, it would have gone back on him. “If a player throws an M80 in the middle of a room, it would reflect on that player who threw it.”

Ashley talks about how interesting that Yasha is not performative, and yet has been doing these public performances with the harp. It’s a great experiment for Ashley--Yasha doesn’t like the attention, but feels like she is making something beautiful for the world.” She’s trying to change something about how she views herself & her place in the world. She was raised to be a weapon for the Sky Spear, but she’s also extremely gentle and loves flowers & beautiful music, and the further away she’s gotten from the tribe, she’s falling in love with gentle, beautiful things. 

Liam also points out it easy (real, but simplistic) to make an entire character centered around a single personality trait: “I’m angry all the time. I’m sad all the time.” He thinks it’s more realistic to see nuance in personality.

Liam can see some paths for Caleb to find peace & do good. He doesn’t know if Caleb is conscious of those. He thinks it’s a huge step forward to admit he was molded in this direction at all and that it wasn’t all his choice, but doesn’t know if this is the same possibility as redemption.

He also mentions Essek in this answer: there was/is attraction there, both intellectual and physical--the forehead kiss was a big marker of that--and he’s interested in seeing where that goes because he’s invested in Essek’s redemption arc on its own, but Essek is not as high on the list as other things Caleb/the M9 need to work on. He loved the “high spy times” of the Essek arc and the tangled-up-ness of feelings getting involved at the same time as intense commitment to duty.

Liam always felt Matt would bring Molly back in some aspect, even though Caleb always demurred because he doesn’t believe in fate. Dani and Brian agree that this is the start of a new act.

Ashley cried at the Vilya reunion. She thought that was an incredible moment and was so glad to see Keyleth. Liam: “Keyleth as part of our story is everything to me. That story is really important to me, so getting just a glimpse of her again was so important to me.” They could all see how that affected Marisha & how special it was to her. Liam: “It was such a great note in her song or color in her painting. She achieved magnificent things and was powerful and great, but had a very heartbreaking and sad ending, so to have this sliver of joy go back in is so complex and beautiful and masterfully done.”

Aaaaaaand that’s all for tonight! Remember, no Critical Role this week. Talks will be back in two weeks. As always, don’t forget to love each other. <3

[heniareth]

For the OC ask meme: What does your character like in other people?, What was your OC's favorite toy/item as a child?, Under what circumstances do they find killing to be acceptable or unacceptable?, How is their sense of humor? Do they have one?, In what situation was your OC the most calm they’ve ever been?, What is your favorite thing about your OC? for your Astala :) I chose one from every category. I hope that's alright. Don't feel pressed to answer all of them if it's too much :)

Heyy!! Thank you so much for the ask, this'll be fun XD Until I play the other games, it's once again time to talk about Astala Tabris.

What does your character like in other people?

On the top of the list is definitely loyalty. There's a special place in Astala's heart for loyal and dedicated people, people she can trust and rely on (almost) no matter what.

Apart from that, she likes people who are compassionate, people who are able to smile in the face of danger, people who can take a joke and fire one right back, and people who are truthful to who they are and stand up for it. If we're talking about looks, she tends to notice smiles. Somebody with a bright smile will almost never not be beautiful to her.

What was your OC’s favorite toy/item as a child?

She had a stuffed mabari that I’ve talked about here (and you’ve probably already read it, so I’m not going to repeat it). But that was her favorit toy, so there’s still a favourite item left XD

On one occasion her mother brought home a very nice pair of red boots for little Astala. They had some spots and smelled strongly of salt and algae, but they were red and warm and to die for. She was only ever allowed to wear them inside the alienage, never when they went to the market or the docks or any other place frequented by humans. Astala understood that her boots were a secret to be kept. She assumed that they’d be taken away from her if the humans saw her running around with something so nice. This made the boots all the more special, like her family’s own little rebellion. The real reason for hiding the boots, of course, was to avoid raising suspicions as to her mother’s illegal dealings. Astala wore them proudly until she outgrew them, at which point they passed on to the kid of a friend of her father’s.

Under what circumstances do they find killing to be acceptable or unacceptable?

For Astala, killing is acceptable under the following circumstances: the person is actively attacking her and/or a friend and/or somebody who’s defenseless; they don’t back down or flee when given the chance to; and/or they have done something terrible to her or to a loved one. In this last case, the word isn’t exactly “it’s acceptable” for her and more “they deserved it”. Vaughan Urien, who’s the bad guy in the city elf’s backstory, is somebody Astala has killed (partly) out of vengeance. If a person surrenders, however, or if she beats them, she’ll almost always spare them. There are a few exceptions to this, one of them being if the person in question is a parent, which... complicates the matter very much. I’m very much looking forward to what she’ll do with Loghain. On one hand, he’s made a pact with slavers and allowed them to take her people to fund his war. On the other hand, he’s Anora’s father, Anora is right there... and he has surrendered. I really don’t know what will win in this case, her outrage over the injustice done to her people or the memory of how it felt losing her mother.

How is their sense of humor? Do they have one?

She definitely has one, although I don’t quite know how to describe it. So I’m just going to show you a bit:

"Why don't we take a moment to introduce ourselves properly? I'll start." Astala sat down cross-legged, straightened her back and affixed a smile to her face. "Hi! I'm Astala Tabris. I come from the Denerim Alienage and I've been a Grey Warden for a grand total of… For how long was I out again?"

"A night and a day," the witch, Morrigan, answered.

"I've been a Grey Warden for four days, then. I like flowers and plum-filled cakes with milk and honey, and I dislike itchy clothing and working at taverns. Alistair? Your turn." She gave him a pointed look over her smile.

Alistair pulled a face. "Do I have to?"

"Yes, you do," Astala nodded emphatically. "What else are you gonna bond over if not my terrific style of leadership?"

Alistair sighed, but shifted into a more upright position. "Right. I'm Alistair. I've been a Grey Warden for a year and a bit. I was trained as a templar before that."

"Wonderful,” Astala said, cheerful smile still plastered on her face. “Likes and dislikes?"

"Cheese and… and darkspawn? What do you want me to say?" Alistair threw the stick he had been breaking to tiny pieces into the campfire. "Where did you get this 'bonding activity' from anyway?"

Astala’s smile grew into a grin. "Why, the Chantry-run education program for us poor alienage kids, of course.”

That’s her sense of humor. It probably carries a good dose of mischief and general tomfoolery. She likes to mess around.

In what situation was your OC the most calm they’ve ever been?

At first, I was thinking about this in terms of “in what stressful situation was your OC the most calm”. And while Astala may appear calm outwardly, it’s a mask nine times out of ten.

The most calm she’s ever been is probably a few days after defeating the Archdemon. She’s still in that kind of post-battle haze where she wants to do nothing but lie around, maybe sleep for a while, maybe eat something, and this time she actually doesn’t have to do anything but lie around (Wynne expicitly told her so). The smoke clouds over Denerim have finally vanished, she’s home, her family is safe, her companions are alive and unharmed or have been healed, the Blight is over, Zevran is there... The future is a mystery and she doesn’t know what she’ll do next with her life, but that can wait. Right now, she has a chance to rest, and she grabs it with both hands.

What is your favorite thing about your OC?

I’m very attached with her reluctance to leave anybody behind and her fear of death. It’s something I can relate to and they make for good storytelling; at one point she’ll have to decide which of the two she’d rather do >:) . I also recently decided that if she’d ever have a symbol associated to her, it’s the sea and particularly the waves crashing against a rocky cliff, tunneling through the stone and dragging gravel in and out of the tunnels in an ever-thundering cacophony of sounds. The waves just have something relentless and unstoppable about them, and they smooth out even the hardest and roughest stone. I haven’t worked out yet if Astala is the stone or the waves; probably a bit of both. But I like this piece of symbolism.

---

Thank you so much for the ask!! These questions really are a ton of fun (and I got to share some writing! Yey! :D). It’s also amazing how much they can help to flesh out characters, or to reveal things that I knew but didn’t know I knew, if that makes sense. Anyways, I had a lot of fun with this and I hope you had fun reading it as well ^^

[lesetoilesfous]

5. Comical roleplay for Kanders?

Ok I went A DIRECTION with this and I really hope you like it, thank you so much for the prompt!!

(If you’d like me to write you a dragon age fic, send me a prompt from here!)

@dadrunkwriting

Pairing: Kanders

Characters: Anders, Karl

Tags: the Circle is violently abusive, reference to infanticide, reference to suicide, reference to abusive religious institutions, tyhe author Gets Political (when doesn't she), Anders is going to change the world in a bright pink dress, Karl is hopelessly in love with him, pro-mage propaganda

Rating: Mature

It’s almost midnight halfway through the month of Wintersend. The Circle is dark, the enchantments controlling the tower’s heat and lighting having long since switched into nocturnal mode. Despite this, and the high, thick darkness that came from rooms and rooms without windows, a handful of stars are suspended in the air at one corner of the apprentice’s dormitory. At least, Karl assumes they look like stars. His own memory of the night sky is blurred and vague, fuzzed over by the veil of early childhood. And of course, he hasn’t seen enough but watercolours of the sky itself since he was seven years old. But he likes to think the cloud of glittering witchlights that he, Anders and the other have summoned into the air might look like stars. He sees some of the younger children staring at the lights with an expression of something like awe, their dark eyes wide in hunger-stricken faces. Karl ignores the ache in his chest, and coaxes the lights to glow a little brighter.

In the middle of the crowded children, Anders is wearing a bright pink dress. Where exactly he got it, Karl has no idea. He also has no idea how Anders has managed to keep the thing away from the templar’s attentions for nearly five years. Every child is stripped of their own clothing as soon as their brought into the Circle and issued with the same, standard, worn apprentice robes that all of them had to wear. The clothes itches, and were often mended. Many of them smelled of sweat and other things left behind by the many generations before them. Choosing their own clothing: especially clothing as ostentatious and lurid as the pink affair Anders was currently strutting about in - was strictly forbidden to even the Senior Enchanters. Which means that this in itself is something of a sight to behold.

There’s also the fact that Anders has plaited his long strawberry blonde hair onto either side of his head, rouged his lips and dusted his face with powder. He looks ridiculous. He looks beautiful, and Karl is trying very hard not to think about it. Karl and the other older apprentices Anders has roped into this are not just managing the lights: they’re also running several low level heat spells. The trick was keeping the magic low enough not to alert the mages and enchanters on the second floor, whilst making it strong enough to beat back the thin layer of frost that crept across the stone floor of the dormitories at this time of year. The templars said that the Circle’s enchantments were designed to keep the building warm enough to live in, but Karl and the others had noticed how many additional layers the templars tended to wear during Wintersend down here. (They didn’t speak of the children they’d lost. Usually the youngest, more shocked by the cold than anything, taken in the night so that when the others woke up at first they though they were sleeping.)

Karl is jerked out of his reverie by Anders’ voice in a ridiculous falsetto. “Oh no!! Not the evil Hessarian. If only there were some friendly mage to help me. Shartan, catch me as I faint my love.” With that and a pirouette, Anders dropped himself into the arms of the much shorter Seran Amell, kitted out in a robed version of elvhen armour. Amell flushes red to the tips of his ears when Anders catches his face and kisses him, soundly, and several of the children giggle. When Anders pulls back, Amell’s lips are red with makeup and Anders’ eyes have a wicked gleam of gold in the witchlight.

“Oh friendly mages, where might I find you.” He reaches out into the dark, searching.

Anders’ ‘Unedited’ Wintersend carol was a piece of theatre he’d performed every year since he’d turned thirteen. Every year around midwinter, the Chantry Sisters would give them a long, special mass which was compulsory for all apprentices and junior mages. The mass explained, in detail, why the children in attendance were personally responsible for the ruin of the world: for the blights, for demons, for all evil. That they were born twisted, and dirty, violent and corrupt. That the best they could do was hope that one day the Maker might welcome them back into his light.

Not coincidentally, Wintersend was also when the number of attempted suicides among the junior mages and apprentices skyrocketed. At seventeen, Karl has seen too many ways to die, and most of them have been self inflicted. He tries not to think about it.

Anders, on the other hand, puts on plays. A soapy, silly pantomime in which Andraste turns in her hour of need to the ‘good mages’ never mentioned anywhere in the Chantry gospels. And together with her lover Shartan, the elf, the mages help her win a mighty victory. Every years, the kids from the alienage and kidnapped by force from their Dalish clans attach themselves with force to the notion of Shartan, a name that the new arrivals have often never heard. Every years, the kids boo and cheer in hushed whispers in the precious hour between templar patrols - mercifully spare in the colder months, when none of the soldiers in their prison want to be on the colder lower levels in their armour.

Karl thinks, probably, Anders has saved more lives than he knows. But he steps into the witchlight, compelled by an ache in his chest that never seems to go away when he looks at Anders, and he meets the fire in his brown eyes, and he thinks that maybe he knows. Softly, Karl speaks, the faces of the children and teeangers around them fading into blurred light. Anders is wearing fake pearls and fake gold in his ears, and everything about him is bewitching and lovely. “Blessed Andraste, I am here. My friends and I do not wish to see harm done to anyone, and our magic has only ever been used for good and healing.” Karl falls to one knee, and thinks that it is not only an act when Anders’ hand brushes lightly against his shoulder. Karl stares at Anders pale, scarred feet as he goes on. “Please may we help you.”

The children hold their breath.

Anders’ fingers run beneath Karl’s chin, his fingertips silky and cold. Gently, he lifts Karl’s chin, and Karl looks up into his face: all sharp lines framed by twists of red and gold. Anders smiles at him, lips fuller with the rouge and smudged pink by the kiss. “Yes.” He says, softly, to whispered cheers from the children. “I welcome the assistance of my friends, the mages.”

[tabriscadash]

I was asked this on my old blog right as I set about transitioning to this one, so...

The first character I ever fell in love with: for DA:O, dare I say Daveth? What can I say -- I irrationally got incredibly attached to him. otherwise, DEFINITELY Morrigan, and I have crystal clear memories of my first run through Lothering and looking at Morrigan like 😍 the whole time. For DA:2/E, Carver -- unless you count Anders & Justice since I knew of them from Awakening beforehand, in which case probably Justice. For DA:I, it’s a toss-up between Vivienne or Cole -- I technically liked Cole first but SPECIFICALLY in the supporting material (Asunder), and didn’t vibe with him anywhere near as much in the game, AND I got him as a companion after I got Vivienne, so probably Vivienne.

A character that I used to love/like, but now do not: for DA:O, I guess Oghren? I never loved him, but I liked the idea of him because I really liked the dwarves/Orzammar side of DA’s worldbuilding -- but he’s such an unlikeable character that I just.. don’t vibe with him at all. I debate recruiting him every single time now, and I don’t think I ever do his personal quest (in the base game OR Awakening). for DA:2/E, I don’t really have anyone that fits -- but I REALLY wanted to like Merrill and Aveline more than I did, and especially in Aveline’s case, I can’t stand her and genuinely think she’s the unintended, secret Big Bad of the whole game. for DA:I, probably Cole, bc I was really into the idea of a little walking-corpse serial killer animated by a spirit as per the book, but that’s not really the vibe in DA:I, and combined with the somewhat patronising/ableist language and how significantly he is infantilised (including by the fandom) I just got put off him. I do still like him, but not as much.

A ship that I used to love/like, but now do not: for DA:O, I don’t really have one? I guess see my DA:I answer, lol... for DA:2/E, has to be Anders - I don’t think he’s OOC in 2, but I think his writing does so little with him and he feels v. reductive. Where his relationship could be SO interesting and angsty, it instead is written in a really dull and/or cringey way. It would have been nice to see Anders more like the Anders of Awakening near the beginning of the game (rather than random, infrequent and questionably rare snippets), and then see the progression of his relationship with Justice as the game went on -- I want more interesting abominations, PLEASE. for DA:I, listen I cannot express to you HOW EXCITED I was for my planned Lavellan to romance Sera… also I used to be way more tolerant of Cullen x Amell/Surana ships because, like, hey dark ships are fun, right? But since Cullen’s ~wholesome whitewash~ in DA:I, and his fandom clamouring to absolve him of any wrongdoing ever.. it’s boring to me.

My ultimate favourite character™: for DA:O, probably Sten? or Morrigan. They’re both fantastic, and also are significant comfort chars for me. for DA:2/3, honestly, probably my own Hawke -- I feel so hugely proud of her, and can’t imagine I’d enjoy the game anywhere near as much had I not played it as my Hawke. If not her, maybe Sebastian or Carver? for DA:I, I really love Vivienne, as well as Blackwall, and Solas is a great character even if I probably would not say I liked him.

Prettiest character: for DA:O, we all know it’s Zevran. for DA:2/E, I think Aveline -- although her aggressively bland colour-scheme lets her down in a major way (although I respect her dedication to all orange all day every day). There’s just something about her arms -- very Abby from TLOU:2. for DA:I, maybe Josephine? Ser Barris is very pretty, too...

My most hated character: for DA:O, I really didn’t like Alistair, Wynne and Oghren, and of my companions - Oghren is probably my least favourite. He’s vulgar and also profoundly uninteresting. for DA:2/E, it has to be Aveline. There’s just something about ineptitude and a complete, wilful refusal to take accountability for your actions that I can’t stand. It would be okay if it was an intentional character flaw, but the game/narrative treats her like she’s lawful good and it really annoys me. for DA:I, maybe Iron Bull? He was a huge disappointment for me. I also really dislike Sera, Cassandra, and Varric. I’m so sick of Varric - I never want to see him again.

My OTP: for DA:O, I really loved Zevran’s romance -- but I am also very amused by the fact that Leliana got to ‘love’ status with Kallian accidentally, AND I got the ‘love’ glitch for Justice (👀) and Velanna. I do sometimes wonder about an AU where Kallian is forced to make a politically expedient marriage with Nathaniel Howe for diplomatic reasons in order to consolidate her position as Arlessa, and it being an entirely platonic arrangement (it’s not like anyone expects an heir from an infertile Grey Warden) -- and maybe Zev and Nate kiss sometimes, who knows? I also LOVE my Darkspawn Chronicles AU where Kallian and Nelaros are a happy, married couple each hiding their skills with weapons from each other like dumb, cute sweethearts. They shelter Zevran when he fails to kill Alistair and a poly couple evolves. for DA:2/E, I love the IDEA of a Seb romance that isn’t so strictly conditional around the structures that abused him -- he should be allowed to love, chastely or otherwise, but free from the Chantry OR his position as prince/heir. I’d LOVE to actually have a romance with him where you can actually challenge the abuse he’s experienced. for DA:I, Malika doesn’t have a canon romance (although I think when I replay, I’m going to romance Josephine!) but I think Blackwall has an amazing romance. Solas’ is also iconic, it must be said. 

My NOTP: for DA:O, I really dislike Alistair in a shipping capacity; he’s immature and says a lot of misogynistic shit and I don’t think he’s the worst for it, but I don’t really vibe with shipping him, having played the game as a female city elf. for DA:2/E, I wouldn’t say I have one, particularly? although I really dislike Aveline’s relationship with her husband simply because it seems incredibly inappropriate, given that they work together and she has power over him -- and because I dislike her, generally, I don’t feel inclined to do something nice for her. for DA:I, I suppose Sera/Lavellan -- although I’m not AGAINST it, it just really isn’t for me, having attempted it. I also don’t really vibe with Dorian x Iron Bull. Something abt the way the game handled BDSM and their relationship banter specifically I don’t really like.

Favourite episode quest: for DA:O, probs Orzammar/the Deep Roads. I really love the dwarven lore! and, of course, Fort Drakon is really funny, even though it’s not canon in my game iirc. for DA:2/E, maybe the murder mystery with the serial killer, where ultimately Leandra dies? I also really enjoyed all the companion quests. for DA:I, The Descent (just, all of it, lmao) and everything to do with the Avvar. Crestwood also BANGED.

Saddest death: for DA:O, it’s frankly a fucking INJUSTICE that Shianni gets murdered if you make her Bann of the Alienage -- the idea of that happening whilst Kallian is in Amaranthine and unable to protect her :( genuinely very upsetting. I go back and forth on who is made Bann, tbf, so idk how canonical it is: I think maybe Cyrion would get it, but I’m also endeared to Soris holding the position, with Shianni as Hahren. for DA:2/E, Bethany. I wish both twins had had the chance to reach Kirkwall :(. Let Leandra die instead. for DA:I, maybe not the saddest death, but the most memorable for me was that one sleeping dragon in the Hissing Wastes.. leave her alone. Stay out of a womans’ business.

Favourite season game: DA:O!

Least favourite season game: DA:I.

Character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but I hate: for DA:O, Alistair. I cannot deal with his complacency and hypocrisy. for DA:2, I really disliked Merrill but I honestly cannot remember why. DEFINITELY Varric -- I hated how the game forces you to be his best friend, and if you’re low approval, you have to endure these pointless pissy little comments with this little anti-dwarf centrist pissant. After the expedition, I literally have no reason to put up with him, and I NEVER take him out. I hate that he plays the same role in DA:I, too. for DA:I, the Iron Bull was hugely disappointing, and I also really don’t vibe with Cassandra. She just seems very wishy-washy and complacent and hypocritical, and many of her comments about other cultures seem snide for literally no reason other than bigotry. 

My ‘you’re a piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave: for DA:O, lbr probably Sten. Mans is gonna launch a HORRIFYING invasion in the next game iirc and frankly, I’m ok with it. Just wanna see that big bastard again ❤🥵. for DA:2/E, I LOVE Gamlen, ok? for DA:I, I am not sure if I have one.

My ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave: for DA:O, if any of you so much as LOOK at Velanna wrong, it’s hands. That includes Bioware. I also feel incredibly protective of and sad for Morrigan. for DA:2/E, probably Sebastian -- I feel so sad for him, and so frustrated by the limitations with the game. for DA:I, I’m honestly not sure.. maybe Josephine? I don’t really feel this way about Sera, but I do think she deserves better from the game and its writing, and also from fandom: there are valid criticisms of her, but the hate she gets is not proportional to any valid issues with her -- and gee, I wonder why that is.

My ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but i still love it’ ship: for DA:O, I did use to find Cullen x Surana/Amell intriguing as a dark ship -- I actually hc that Neria Surana is actually Nelaros’ sister, and have dabbled with it as a dark ship. I also am interested in Loghain/Alistair - which each pretends the other is someone else. Alistair is wooby, hate ships are, in general, fun -- so long as we acknowledge that they are, indeed, unhealthy ships. for DA:2/E, I kind of feel like Sebastian romances are, invariably, kind of dark... and, similarly, Anders romances -- especially with certain red Hawkes, The way it ends is, invariably, bordering on fucked up. ALSO Hawkecest is weird and wonderful: GET WITH IT. 

My ‘they’re kind of cute, and I lowkey ship them, but I’m not too invested’ ship: for DA:O, I joked about Velanna x Leliana once and I’ve not been able to stop thinking about it ever since… Velanna x Sigrun is also something that can be so personal. Ariane x Finn is adorable and are paid DUST by Bioware AND fandom. I actually am really into Anora x Nathaniel & NO I will NOT explain myself; it’s a crackship but it’s MY crackship. for DA:2/E, Isabela x Fenris is super cute, but I don’t pay enough attention to them to really have super committed thoughts & feelings on them. for DA:I, Blackwall x Josephine is cute as a background ship; I also think Maryden x Cole is sweet.

[melisusthewee]

WIP Wednesday - Let’s Talk Music

Thank you to @cleverblackcat @kittynomsdeplume @noire-pandora and @morganlefaye79 for tagging me!

I don’t have any writing to really offer today.  I’ve been trying to work on that Haven fic but unfortunately Aloysius hasn’t been co-operating with me despite all my best efforts to make him speak.  I may take a break from writing and pivot towards completing some art memes, but Wednesday just sort of crept up on me and here we are.  So instead, I’m sharing something that both is but also isn’t a work in progress?

It’s “in progress” because while I’m happy with where it currently is, I’ve said that about playlists and soundtracks before and later changed them.  I’ve worked hard on this and talked several friends’ ears off about songs I’ve heard or artists that seemed to work and thanks to their feedback I think this is a really good one.  It’s gone through several edits as well, and may potentially even go through more down the road.  So I’m saying this counts for today.

If you give it a listen (and I hope you do because I’m very proud of it so far), I hope you enjoy it and maybe discover an artist you didn’t know before.  It clocks in at around 51 minutes and features 13 tracks which span Quinn Trevelyan’s story and important events of the main game through to Trespasser.

If you are interested, below the cut is a list of tracks and a brief blurb or description about who or what they’re meant to represent.  I was going to go into things in more depth and talk about how I built it, why I picked the songs I did, and the B-Sides that were left on the cutting room floor, but after realizing I had written nearly 4 pages about just as many songs, I realized it was too much for anyone to read.  So below is just a very brief summary and I think that most of the music would speak for itself, but I’m happy to expand more on anything that anyone finds either interesting… or confusing.  (There is also Solas content because I knew a few of you love that.)

You have to click on this sentence to go to the playlist because Tumblr’s coding for “Read More” seems to be conflicting with the HTML code to embed a functional playlist.  Because of course it is.

Quinn’s tarot card is the Wheel of Fortune as his story is a series of unpredictable highs and lows.  What the Maker giveth, He also taketh away.  The playlist follows that trend of highs and lows with upbeat songs followed by darker or more mellow ones.  Whenever I create a playlist, I try to think of a general tone or sound that I want to be carried through the soundtrack.  I want the overall genre or sound to tell the story as much as the individual songs.  Because of that, you’ll see artists repeat a couple of times, and when they do it’s always intentional.  You’ll also notice that most of the vocalists are male.  This was again intentional because this is Quinn’s story, and he’s a man.  They are his songs and I wanted the vocals to reflect that.

The Cult of Dionysus - pre-Conclave Quinn

Quinn at his most basic and stereotypical before any character development happens whatsoever - poppish, upbeat, and maybe just a little obnoxious.  He smokes, he drinks, he fucks, and nothing else matters.

The Sound of Silence - Aloysius’ Theme

I like Aloysius as a more practical view and examination of Quinn and the cult that grows around him.  He affords an opportunity to look at Quinn both as the Herald but also as just a person.  He is stoic and mild-mannered, a dutiful soldier, and an excellent foil for Quinn.  This is also absolutely a reference to an Arrested Development joke.

Isle of Dogs - Quinn’s true theme

Quinn is a walking disaster constantly falling victim to his own hubris.  There’s a morose sort of resentment to the lyrics, of someone who is constantly struggling against the tide.  In a lot of ways, this is basically a reaction or push back to all the crap I have put him through.

Providence - “In Hushed Whispers”

There are no Templars here.  The first few lines relate a lot to the dismissal the fledgling Inquisition receives from what remains of the Chantry, but the rest of the lyrics are very much about the mages and Fiona’s dealings with the Venatori.

Seven Devils - “In Your Heart Shall Burn

No male vocals in this one to symbolize the change in perspective.  This is both a bit of an easy and obvious choice for this story beat.  Female vocals for Corypheus might seem strange, but when I created my Warden’s soundtrack I tended to use powerful choruses and female vocals for anything related to Blight, Archdemons, or the darkspawn.  I carried that idea over to this as Corypheus is one of the seven Magisters.

Caesar - becoming the Inquisitor

This is a softer and quiet interlude in the wake of the loss of Haven and struggle through the snow.  If the previous song marks the end of the first act, this song marks the beginning of the second.

King - “Here Lies the Abyss”

In my written world state, Alistair is both the king and the Grey Warden contact (this goes back to that longform fic I am working on).  I suppose it’s a bit unfair because in the end that has a major impact on why Quinn makes the decision he does at Adamant (a rather threatening letter from the Warden helps too).  Think of this as a duet between Quinn and Hawke.

My Type - the love interest

“Here Lies the Abyss” was completed first, then a romance triggered, then “Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts”.  This is that sort of inbetween interlude and is very much inspired by how I may have flirted with multiple characters a little too much and basically triggered several romances at once.  I also went into Quinn’s playthrough having no idea who I was going to romance and just let him shop around.  And it came down to a coin flip in the end, so “you have a pulse and you are breathing” is pretty much the only standards he has.

Boheme Supreme - party at Halamshiral

All I have to say is that I love techno swing, every single lyric in this song is perfect, and I want you all to picture Quinn Trevelyan walking into the Winter Palace with his Inner Circle entourage around him, dressed up in that outfit I drew with that peacock feathered cap and having a drink in his hand throughout the entire night’s affair.

Hell’s Coming With Me - “Doom Upon All the World”

This is the climax of the main game, the rematch between Quinn and Corypheus which I have to imagine is more impressive in concept than it was in game.  I chose the dialogue option when Corypheus calls Quinn an imposter, “I am the Maker’s chosen” as his final challenge.  Sometimes it’s easy to forget that this main is actually very Andrastian.  But he is, and the lyrics, “I am the righteous hand of God/And I am the Devil that you forgot/And I told you one day will see/I’ll be back I guarantee/And that Hell’s coming with me” are the perfect declaration.

Paradise - Jaws of Hakkon & The Descent

Another interlude song.  If the previous one is triumphant than this one is the beginning of a bad turn.  In the interim between the events of the main game and the Exalted Council, things begin to go wrong in little ways.  His relationship with Cassandra begins to break down, eventually ending in the two of them having frequent spats and going their separate ways after returning from the Frostback Basin.  This song is deceptively sarcastic about how good things are.

I Still Love You, Judas - Solas’ Betrayal

Solas… oh, Solas.  Does this song indicate a very complicated and layered relationship between Quinn and Solas?  Yes! Have I attempted to unpack any of this?  Nope!  Have fun with this one!

Tagging for this week: @kita-lavellan @silvanils @nivenor-krosis @drag-on-age @rosella-writes @inquisitoracorn

Battle Cries - Quinn and Cassandra

I saved this one for the very end because it is a story within a story.  It is sad and bittersweet, but also not.  This entire thing feels to me like a duet between Quinn and Cass on what was good, what could never last, and that it’s all over now but that’s okay.  Because “this isn’t a breakup, dear heart, it’s a season finale.”  Does this mean that Quinn sounds like Joey Batey when he sings?  Sure, why not.

[magneticmage]

Quiz Meme; OC-style

I was tagged by @rozhevisny to take this quiz.

I also ended up doing a number of my OCs. They are under the cut for length.

I am tagging @awellboiledicicle @mikkeneko @changeling-fae @higheverweave @yusukesmomjeans @dalishious and @draxen1123 but don't feel pressured to do so if you don't wanna! It's all for fun.

(Inquisitors)

Paeriel Lavellan="You're choking on how much you have to try". Accurate by the time of Inquisition (specifically around Skyhold) as Paeriel very much embodies the virtue of suledin. She can handle the amount she's dealt with but it is still a burden and she worries about how it will affect others if she slips and drops under the weight. She doesn't want more harm to come to innocents and those who are already struggling under their own burdens (mages, dwarves, elves, even the templars to some degree), and yet it is a fight that continues on and on seeming without end. Just as Solas walks his path to break the systems oppressing people, she tries to work within those same systems to better chances for those who need it.

Armashok Adaar="You were meant to". Accurate prior to his joining the Inquisition. He spent so much of his life struggling to find his place as everyone told him what to be; silent, obediant, a weapon to be protected against. He chafed and struggled to find comfort in it and yet he ultimately realized that he was his own person. No one could tell him who and what he was or was meant to be, not even his wife. So he chose for himself; To be Armashok Adaar.

Ransley Trevelyn="This isn't enough for you" Also accurate for pre-Inquisition Ransley, as he balked against his family expectations. They wanted him to marry a nice noblewoman of status and wealth. He courted them but couldn't quite bite the bullet as something about them just lacked....something. Even when he met his lover, he struggled against the fact that they had to be discreet for her reputation as a Knight-Divine. His family demanded he become a Templar, he decided the Seekers would be a better use of his talents. Always when he was told something, his innate ambition would push him for more and better things. While he can give up things as needed, he dislikes it. That last part is something he struggles with-and notably fails during Trespasser-post-Inquisition. This is a trait that Josephine can understand, though like their lover Cassandra, she tempers it in herself and him with patience.

Naranka Cadash="Because you have made mistakes you cannot swallow" Pfft. Yeah, this is very much her. She seeks redemption just as badly as Paeriel does for Solas, just as badly as Blackwell-her love interest-does.

(Inner Circle)

Kara Adaar="Because you cannot hold freedom". Very true. She's seen what freedom has cost her parents to give her a better life and plans to make the most of hers. That desire to enjoy life is shared with Sera. The desire to understand the world through the lens of ensuring that freedom for others is something she shares with Dagna.

Emilyse Trevelyan="You swallow pain and fold around it" Yikes. This is accurate to her time in the Circle, however. She spent much of her time trying to be a "good" mage, despite a number of abuses by the Templars and the Chantry. It was only when her brother visited her during his training as a recruit that some of those abuses came to light and she was brought to the Circle in Ostwick, closer to home and with the newly added bribes to ensure her safety, she did much better. However, this newfound life did not for too long as the Rebellion broke out and she was left adrift for a time before making her way with some other refugees to the Conclave at Haven. She was nervous about so many Templars, but eventually found solace and peace with Cullen as they each began to heal over their own traumas of their respective sides, and together as they began a family shortly after Trespasser.

Samrel Lavellan="because you cannot hold freedom" Interesting. He's actually one of my simplest OCs; a simple life with his clan and husband, First to the Keeper and cousin to Paeriel, is all he wants. Unlike some of my other Dalish OCs, he hasn't faced quite the same level of hardship and loss, and though he does mourn the loss of his clan, he seeks to rebuild it alongside his husband and the few survivors that managed to escape the humans' blades. So perhaps that defiance of the losses inflicted harkens back to the Dale's and the elves' refusal to submit to the Alienages, by simply standing up and saying "No, you cannot silence us" is enough? That could be a type of freedom and there is power in that refusal. Thoughts to consider more later.

Pyrmar Cadash="This isn't enough for you". Oh that's interesting. Pyrmar is one of those characters that seems super simple (ex-surfacer Carta bruiser with a notable penchant for leadership as a Champion) and, for the most part, he is. He likes drink and fun as much as any other mercenary like the Chargers. But, like Dorian, he sometimes feels inadequate in some way. As if he is meant for more; to be and do more. Most notably for basic respect and care, something his upbringing in the cutthroat nature of the Carta was missing. Dorian shows him that he is capable of love and being loved and The Iron Bull gives him the respect and belonging he lacked previously. While he can still fall orey to his baser nature at times, his heart as grown much over the years and so it becomes less common to "want more" as he used to.

(Last Court)

Aurore de Serault="Because you have made mistakes you can't swallow" Ooo. She does carry some lingering guilt and grief over her late husband's death at the hands of the Game. She struggles with the Orlesian court at times, and much prefers solitude and peaceful quiet to gossipy ballrooms and noble Lords and ladies demanding a dance, a bonding point for her and her love interests of The Silent Huntsman and the Elegant Abbess. However, it's not that she's unskilled in the Game; in fact, she's quite good at it. She simply prefers simplicity to more complex machinations. All that said, she does regret the ferocity with which she holds grudges; she had gone on to murder the entire families of those individuals responsible for her husband's death.

Marcel de Serault="You swallow pain and fold around it". Hmmm. Not sure of this one. Marcel divorced his wife to pursue a cloistered and scholarly life in pursuit of knowledge (he was once a Chevalier). Eventually he began to crave the adventure of the Game again, which is how he fell for The Wayward Bard and the Dashing Outlaw. Again, not too sure but it's interesting. Perhaps he simply internalized his losses and pain?

(Hawkes)

Knight-Commander Jasper Hawke of Kirkwall="because you've made mistakes you can't swallow" Oh cool! Jasper watches his younger siblings-three of his fellow quadrupled and Carver- go off into the Deep Roads expedition. He made the decision to stay behind to protect Bethany and their mother in case things went south. Despite assurances from his departing siblings, things did go south. After being pissed at Batrand, he sighed and went to work for the Templars. Shortly thereafter, despite his best efforts, Bethany was caught by Templars and taken to the Circle. Jasper did what he could to protect and shield his sister from the worst abuses of the Templars under Meredith's command, no matter the personal costs and enmity it earned him from his siblings and companions. It even ended his relationship with Anders around the beginning of Act 2. After Meredith was defeated, he worked with Cullen to try and reform the Templars and rebuild Kirkwall post-Chantry boom. His efforts were strained once red lyrics began to show up and corrupt his fellow templars. Despite narrowly avoiding being swept into the group while infiltrating it to gather intel, he succeeded in driving them out. When Cullen left for the Inquisition, he stepped up to continue reforming the Templars for protecting the mages. While he originally balked at the pro-mage decisions of the Inquisition, he ultimately agreed that the Chantry had abused all of its charges-mages and templars both. He began to reshape the Templars under his command to fit in line with the changing world; a choice to take lyrium, and a recovery and rehabilitation plan set in stone for all members who wished to leave, new rules and regulations in place to protect the rights and dignity of both mages and Templars, slowly making them a secular force beyond the Chantry but under the control of Vivenne's newly reformed Circle of Magi perhaps. He does what he believes to be right and for the best of his family, even if they dislike his decisions. A trait he no doubt picked up from his mother.

Lord Gray Hawke of House Amell="You swallow pain and fold around it" This is fitting for Lord Amell. While Jasper and Violet always held loft goals to pursue and Skye simply wanted to go and see the world for all it was, Gray preferred to remain at home and tend to their family. He is the one most connected to the Amell legacy rather than the Hawke self-made determination. That's not to say it isn't there; he's more than willing to help others and make something of himself, but it comes back to wanting to appease and help his family in whatever ways he could. He pines for Anders for a great deal of time, but doesn't make a move due to either Jasper dating the mage or simply not wanting to be a rebound for his brother. In the end, however, Anders surprises him (perhaps nudged on by Skye and Violet) by initiating a kiss and the two quickly develop into a stable relationship. He is even willing to leave all he'd built to go on the run with Anders and further aid him in his cause. Gray is just a cutie who wants a simple meal and a nice husband. If he gets to watch Anders shoot lightning at fools, well, who is he to laugh?

Viscountess Skye Hawke="Because you cannot hold freedom". Accurate. Skye loves her freedom. While she is certainly ambitious, it often comes down to more power means more freedom. She rules as Viscountess of Kirkwall for a time until abdicating in favor of Varric so she can pursue Tallis across the seas, but also to simply go back to adventuring and exploring. While she does not care for the Qun and its Qunari, she cares about people and her family most of all. It is one of the few tethers she did not choose but it is the one she keeps above all others. After all, even the Sky must touch the earth at some point just as a Hawk must return to its nest to rest and tend its young.

Champion Violet Hawke of Kirkwall="Because you have made mistakes you cannot swallow". Fitting given that Violet is both a blood-mage (also a spirit-healer and force-mage) and extremely pro-mage freedom, and her choices often led her to conflict with Jasper due to their views and lives. She has only ever wanted to be free to live her life as she chooses, with is how she fell for Isabela. She fell for Fenris because she's a bleeding heart who wants to help everyone as much as she can. Kirkwall left its mark on her and she's struggling to do better than what she views as a failure due to her diplomatic nature in the name of mage freedom by the time the Inquisition comes around. While just as driven by the cause for equality as Anders, she often privately struggled with her mother's death among the many other revelations and choices of her family, fearing the loss of all she called dear. Luckily Fenris and Isabela returned to her and they made a pact to live well on the seas after everything had settled down and Champion Hawke was no longer needed.

(Awakening)

Senior Warden Dion Caron="This isn't enough for you" Okay. So, Dion joined the Wardens to escape the Templars (p.s. it didn't work) and his adopted sister Victoire-Ainsley was already joining and he had promised to protect her for their parents. He's happily married to Garam and spends much of his time training recruits and fostering camaderie in the ranks of the Wardens. What more could he want? Perhaps it is nothing and the doubt is simply there as is human nature, perhaps he frets about his dwindling time in the world before his Calling, perhaps he does want more. Who can say?

Senior Warden/Warden-Constabke Victoire-Ainsley Caron of Orlais="This isn't enough for you" Pfft. Victoire-Ainsley's ambition to make a name for herself and her family (she came from a long line of Chevaliers) nearly cost her her life and resulted in her father's death. Her mother adopted an orphan boy-Dion-in the hopes it would curb some of her darker tendencies. It partially succeeded. While she did not go as far as she'd once been willing, she still acted ruthlessly and this earned her quite the name in the Game for a time. However, her fall from grace was just as bloody as her rise, and she was only spared by the intervention of the Wardens' Conscription. She lost a great deal and was now forever barred from reclaiming it. She acted out for a time and was surprised when the Wardens allowed-encouraged even-it. However the death of her husband to save them during a nasty skirmish against a powerful broodmother she'd led them against resulted in a mission successful but at a cost she hadn't wanted to pay; only her, Dion, Garam, and I senna made it out alive. Since then, she had been working towards redeeming herself, opening up to the criticism and vulnerability she'd been so afraid of, much like Loghain is when he is sent to Orlais. And so while her pride demands more of her, she focuses instead on what she can provide and tries to bite back the bile this causes. After all, this is for the best and that is enough. Right?

Senior Warden Isenna Andras="You were meant to" Isenna lived first under the Orlesian cruelty in the Alienate and then the Templars' in the Circle. It is no wonder she fights to carve a name for herself in history, to make herself her own, to be what she was never meant to even dream of. She wants to be a hero but struggles against her own inner nature to survive. She is driven by the conflict of selflessness and self-preservation. Perhaps Mhairi's idealism is enough to tip the scales for her.

Senior Warden Garam Kader="Because you have made mistakes you cannot swallow" Accurate. He joined the Wardens after passing off the wrong Carta Boss and then spent years helping Victoire-Ainsley and her brother grow their ambition and then....his unit died beyond the four of them. And all the glamor of the Wardens fell away and he realized just how far some would go and he began to wait for them to step back, hoping they would step back. Victoire-Ainsley and Dion and Isenna did. He did. But the Clarel didn't. He hopes Loughlin will do better as the Warden-Commander of Orlais. He knows he will do better and he knows his husband, Dion, will.

(Wardens)

Warden-Commander Lynera Mahariel of Fereldan="You were meant to" Ouch my heart. Lynera lost Tamlen and never quite recovered. She was forced into a Warden and then into leading the party as the Hero of Fereldan and then into the role of Warden-Commander/Arlessa of Amaranthine and she did it. She took all the pain and hurt and losses over the years, the Taint and its horrors and its strength sapping, the politics and hard decisions; she took it all and she did it. She did what was needed, became what a Grey Warden Commander and hero was meant to be. She can't even say she regrets becoming a Warden anymore as its become so central to her identity now, only mourns the things and people she's lost to get there. I think Sten-excuse me-the Arishok understands this. Perhaps that is why they both hope to never meet on a battlefield unless they are on the same side again.

Warden Isemaya Tabris="You swallow pain and fold around it" Okay that's like SUPER interesting. See, Isemaya learned about the injustices elves face early in life. It cost her her mother's life and very nearly her twin brother's as well, after all. She became a warrior to protect them (her family, her community, her home) and she was good at it. But then she saw a glimpse of a different life with Nelaros, one where she might be happy simply letting someone else deal with all the fighting and clawing and exhaustion. She wanted it, she realized, she wanted it very much. But then she lost him and Shianni was hurt and she was hurt and Vaughn was dead and the humans were so angry. She geared up to protect her people again, to be the brave warrior like her mother before her. And then....Duncan Conscripted her. She was forced from her home, alive and angry and proud, and so she expanded her family to her companions. Then Zevran tried to kill them and they let him live and she watched him like a hawk and saw the same longing for a life, for more in the absence of loss, in him. She helped him heal and learn to live again and he helped her set down her weapons and her anger for a time and then the times became more frequent and they grew closer. She told him she loved him in the brisk Haven air and he gave her a golden earring to match the old and blood-stained wedding band she still wore, and she had found peace. She continued with the Wardens, with helping him take down the Crows, with searching for a cure so they could have more time. She took her pain but instead of weaponizing it like Lynera and others did, she learned to let it go and continue on. She learned to live in spite of, not because of, her pain.

Arcane Advisor Catriona Surana of Fereldan= "Because you have made mistakes you cannot swalllow" Oof. This is definitely Catriona during Origins. Her decisions to betray Jowan, to use blood magic at Ostagar and then to continue to practice and study it despite the stigma it holds, the merging with Compassion to save Cale, to give up her dreams of marriage and freedom and let Alistair marry Anora for the good of Fereldan and again when Leliana went on to become the Left Hand of the Divine and then again as the Divine Victoria...she makes a lot of mistakes and the consequences haunt her for a very long time. While she does manage to find some good in them, or at least simply makes peace with them, they still color how she becomes in 2 and Inquisition and beyond.

Warden Cale Amell=

Teryn Fion Cousland of Gwaren=

Paragon Prince Barran Aeducan=

Warden Paragon Tatha Brosca=

(Origins)

First/Keeper Vireth Mahariel=

"Dark Wolf" Elthorn Tabris=

"Stormcaller" Alaros Surana=

Lord Azul Amell=

Lady "Nightshade" Raven Amell=

Lord Carmine Amell=

Lord Reed Amell=

Lady Marigold Amell=

Captain "Highever Spitfire" Aelynne Cousland=

Princess and Orzammar Commander Valda Aeducan=

(Canon Solo Shepard)

Commander and Spectre Annette Shepard=

(The Sibling Shepards Canon)

Spectre Riley Shepard=

Spectre/XO Roscoe "Ros" Shepard=

Spectre/Commander Joanna "Jo" Shepard=

(Shepard Cousins)

Angelus "Angel" Shepard=

Elliot "El" Shepard=

Jaden "Jay" Shepard=

Alexandra "Alex" Shepard=

Kristopher "Kris" Shepard=

Clover "Clove" Shepard=

(Starship Ryders Canon)

Pathfinder Lucas "Luke" Ryder=

Pathfinder Rebecca "Becca" Ryder=

Pathfinder Shiloh "Shy" Ryder=

Pathfinder Evander "Evan" Ryder=

Pathfinder Asher "Ash" Ryder=

(Baldur's Gate)

Cei Gloomdraft=

Faenerys Elendir=

"Sable Shades" Risaeder Rosandoral=

Saga "Muse" Musehart=

Lyr(e/a/an) Lovemoor=

Rune Mistsea=

Lucine Mistsea=

Roan Roarke=

[reconditarmonia]

Dear Fandom 5K Author

Hi! Thank you for writing for me! I’m reconditarmonia here and on AO3. I have anon messaging off, but mods can contact me with any questions.

Dragon Age | Fullmetal Alchemist | The Locked Tomb | Motherland: Fort Salem | Where the Sky is Silver and the Earth is Brass

General likes:

– Relationships that aren’t built on romance or attraction. They can be romantic or sexual as well, but my favorite ships are all ones where it would still be interesting or compelling if the romantic component never materialized.

– Loyalty kink! Trust, affectionate or loving use of titles, gestures of loyalty, replacing one’s situational or ethical judgment with someone else’s, risking oneself (physically or otherwise) for someone else, not doing so on their orders. Can be commander-subordinate or comrades-in-arms.

– Heists, or other stories where there’s a lot of planning and then we see how the plan goes.

– Femslash, complicated or intense relationships between women, and female-centric gen. Women doing “male” stuff (possibly while crossdressing).

– Stories whose emotional climax or resolution isn’t the sex scene, if there is one.

– Uniforms/costumes/clothing.

– Stories, history, and performance. What gets told and how, what doesn’t get told or written down, behavior in a society where everyone’s consuming media and aware of its tropes, how people create their personas and script their own lines.

General DNW: rape/dubcon, torture, other creative gore; unrequested AUs, including “same setting, different rules” AUs such as soulmates/soulbonds; PWP; food sex; embarrassment; focus on pregnancy; Christmas/Christian themes; infidelity; unrequested polyamory; focus on unrequested canon or non-canon ships; unrequested trans versions of characters.

Smut Likes: clothing, uniforms, sexual tension, breasts, manual sex, cunnilingus, grinding, informal d/s elements, intensity.

—

Fandom: Dragon Age

Character(s):

Group: Cassandra Pentaghast/Female Lavellan

Female Lavellan

Group: Charter & Rector

Genre(s):

Canon-Style Plot - Freeform

Action/Adventure

Worldbuilding

Established Relationship

Mystery/Procedural

I'm playing this game for the first time and loving Cassandra and Lavellan together so much. (I'm playing with a mod where I can romance her with a female PC!) Lavellan starts off as this confused and small and non-Andrastian prisoner who disagrees with Cassandra on so many things, but Cassandra puts so much trust and faith in her and so much on the line for her - even with Lavellans who are adamant that they're not chosen, they're just doing their best and they happen to be the ones in the position to make this choice. Cassandra is so proud to know her, and backs her up even when she disagrees with Lavellan's choices! The romance scene is really cute between two characters who are adults and have a day-to-day working relationship that isn't going to change, but are still just having fun with how charming it is in a way that builds on their friendship. Not to mention their battling together, of course - the ways they can protect each other and fight for each other's goals (and give Cassandra all the elven swords and shields), how worried they sound if the other one gets hurt...whoops, I found myself another loyalty kink ship.

I also just like playing as Lavellan generally, with how much of an outsider she feels (the "Dawn Will Come" scene is so alienating! it really works!) and how much of the game is about visiting the sites of past elven trauma and/or glory days.

My Lavellan uses the (default lol) name of Ellana, is a rift mage, sports a lovely buzzcut and vallaslin, has a lot of feelings about elf history (and visiting the Plains/Graves especially), believes in elven gods and doesn't care to pretend she's Andrastian, and besides Cass is closest friends with Solas, but don't feel that you have to write my specific PC - I'm excited to read about yours too!

But! I also love all the little hints about the work that Leliana's agents are doing, and their friendship (walking in on their card game at Caer Bronach is kind of delightful), and the letter from Rector's mother asking why he uses a code name for work (why are you ashamed of your name, Wilbur??) is one of my favorite in-universe documents. Slice-of-life or slice-of-mission with Charter and Rector would also make me really happy. Here again, just the closeness and trust and faith that these people have in one another is my jam.

Fandom-Specific DNW: Canon-typical levels of Cassandra's association with the Chantry and belief in the Maker/Andraste/the Herald shouldn't be taken to contravene my DNW of Christian themes, but I wouldn't want Satinalia fic or something focused on the Andrastian faith. Please don't put F!Lavellan in a different romance, even if we didn't match on the Cassandra ship.

—

Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist

Character(s):

Group: Olivier Mira Armstrong/Maria Ross

Genre(s):

Action/Adventure

Canon-Style Plot - Freeform

Getting Together

I'll admit: I am a shallow, shallow person who loves the heartwarming and id-satisfying Briggs loyalty-kink complex (The watch! Buccaneer handing Olivier a clean pair of gloves after she kills Raven! Constant and deeply sincere saluting! Olivier’s explanation of why she wants Miles around and her lack of patience for anyone’s shit) but would like an f/f manifestation of it for actual shipping. Post-canon or AU where Maria is assigned to Briggs, or works for Olivier in Central? Does Maria foil a plot against Olivier, or Olivier save Maria's life in battle? Does Olivier order Maria into a firefight? Hit me.

Fandom-Specific DNW: Olivier/men, even mentioned.

—

Fandom: The Locked Tomb

Character(s):

Matthias Nonius

Genre(s):

Action/Adventure

Canon-Style Plot - Freeform

Fantasy

Nonius was one of my favorite new characters in Harrow the Ninth. His whole impossible arrival via evocation-by-poetry, battle with the Sleeper, and epic departure to fight the Beast made me very, very happy on levels I have trouble explaining. It was so heartwarming?! Because it was impossible, and because poetry won, and because they went off to do the best they could...I don't know, exactly. (Iiiii also just love that he's named for the Redwall mouse.) I'd love to read more about his life - being unprepossessing and very human but also paladin-like and really fucking good at being a swordsman, representing the Ninth House in slightly less decrepit times, his mysterious past with Gideon the First (and Pyrrha, sort of), however it happened that he died far from home in an unknown place and couldn't be recovered for burial, "chickenshits don't get beer"? Or, er, his afterlife - going to fight with Marta, Ortus, and Pro, re-encountering G1deon as allies...

—

Fandom: Motherland: Fort Salem

Character(s):

Group: Abigail Bellweather/Raelle Collar

Original Historical Witch Character(s)

Group: Sarah Alder & First Bellweather Ancestor

Genre(s):

Action/Adventure

Canon-Style Plot - Freeform

Mystery/Procedural

Worldbuilding

I fell hard for this show and Abigail/Raelle is the ship I’m most excited about - they get off to a bad start for all kinds of personal history reasons and have problems with each other, but when it gets down to the wire Abigail would do anything for Raelle and is very gung-ho about having Raelle’s unconventional but extremely powerful magic under her leadership, regardless of Raelle being a loose cannon. She told her she loved her!! <3 And by the end, Raelle also clearly knows what Abigail's going through (like when she talks her down in "Citydrop"), respects her leadership, and cares deeply about her and wants to protect her in return. I love that loyalty dynamic, and their competence as fighters/witches.

Physical combat, strength in general, magical strength, ability to work magic together, knowledge of the magical canon vs. out-of-the-box techniques...what parts of their skills and their bond could be challenged in the weird dimension that the end of season 1 leaves them in? Or when they get back home and new challenges await? (In my head, the decision not to send them to War College is not revoked; the unit becomes some kind of special-forces secret strike team rather than cannon fodder.) Maybe something where Raelle goes/has gone into a fight as a berserker-type for Abigail and then comes back to her, or where Abigail protects/has protected her soldier (her girl!! I love her protectiveness of Raelle towards the other cadets, imagine it in a battle!)? Or an arranged marriage AU where it's usual for witch soldiers to marry to combine their magic power or something...If including smut in the story, I'd especially be up for something d/s-y where the loyalty-kinky dynamic of Raelle being Abigail's weapon, at her command, is echoed in sex!

OR. The alternate history that the show has created is so interesting and I'm craving expansion of that through fic! Tell me about the Bellweather ancestor who was a slave and ended up powerful and influential enough to begin a dynasty, and how she met and was recruited by Alder. Or other enslaved witches, witches in the American Revolution or the Civil War, or the founding of Fort Salem and standardization of American military magic with its various influences, or Chinese or Jewish or Mexican immigrant witches who maybe came from different magic traditions and might have had to make the choice of whether or not to reveal that they had magic (if the system knows you because of your descent in the country?), serving their country but also binding their daughters and granddaughters forever.

Fandom-Specific DNW: Abigail/Adil (at all; if he's mentioned, please make them just friends), focus on Raelle/Scylla (dwelling on Raelle still having feelings for Scylla or on her getting over Scylla for Abigail; you don't need to retcon their having been together), Scylla bashing.

—

Fandom: Where the Sky is Silver and the Earth is Brass

Character(s):

Chaye Roznatovsky

Demon

Genre(s):

Fantasy

Canon-Style Plot - Freeform

Worldbuilding

Anything expanding on this story would make me really happy. Chaye’s years with the partisans, the comrades-in-arms she had and loved then and who else’s memory she holds or makes into a weapon, her journey to America, going by the surname of “no one.” The demon’s mirror world, its loss of that world (what exactly happened on the other side?) and its need to be where Jews are, demon Judaism? Or the future of both of them now that they’ve found each other!

Fandom-Specific DNW/Opt-In: DNW Chaye/demon. The premise of the story being what it is, I'm explicitly okay with antisemitism being a prominent feature of the story if you write something that covers either or both characters' backstory, but would prefer post-war antisemitism not to be a focus.

[crystalessenceswrites]

You’re Enchanting--Chapter Three

Summary:  Delphine always told Elazar she would do anything to help him if he was ever in trouble, even knowing his knack for finding it. She didn’t expect to be helping him save the world after someone blows up the Conclave and tears a hole in the sky. Nor did Delphine expect to be falling for anyone, let alone a troubled, former templar, while she’s watching her best friend shape the future of their world with a green glowing hand.

Pairings: Cullen/Trevelyan & Dorian/Lavellan

Warnings: Does Lord Seeker Lucius require a warning, because I feel like he does

Can also be found on AO3

[Chapter One] [Chapter Two] [Chapter Three] [Chapter Four]

Chapter Three- Chaos

“You don’t use a staff blade.”

Delphine stuttered a bit into her waterskin at the sudden comment, or was it a question, from Cullen. “No, I do not.” Wiping her drink off her face, she tried to hide the grimace that rose on her lips. Maker, how unsightly that was, she can’t even drink properly.

“Why not?”

It must have been common for mages to equip their staffs with them in Kirkwall then. Delphine was more curious as to why that was then why she didn’t use one.

“I have never had a need for one.” There was always someone in arms reach of her that was armed with a rather large sword.

“I see…” Cullen trailed off as he took a long drink from his own waterskin.

They had been working with the recruits for the better part of the day now, stopping to rest only before the newest recruits looked ready to drop from exhaustion. Delphine would not admit it to anyone, especially the former templar, but she found herself nearing that point too. Outside of training recruits for the last three days with Cullen, she had been practicing primal magic on her own, trying to build her own confidence in the casting before she ventured out with Elazar. She had not pushed her mana reserves to such lengths since she an apprentice preparing for her Harrowing. It was draining. Delphine did her best to focus on that feeling instead of how Cullen’s hair seemed to glow in the late afternoon sun.

“Have you thought about one? It may prove useful as you continue to master your magic.”

Delphine tried to ignore the, hopefully, unintended insinuation that she did not have full understanding of her abilities. She was an Enchanter from a well-regarded Circle of Magi, she had mastered her magic. Battle magic simply was not a school she had use for in the past, like a staff blade. It was a new tool she simply had to familiarize herself with in order to use it to its full potential.

“Possibly… after our trip to Val Royeaux I might speak with Harritt about it.”

Cullen nods, apparently satisfied. She wondered why he cared to begin with?

“May I ask you a question, Cullen?”

He quirked an eyebrow but made no move to stop her.

“Why did you join the Inquisition?” There were many things about the ex-templar that garnered her curiosity but this one seemed to nag at her the most, well maybe second to how he got the lip scar. She also wasn’t ready to return to training just yet.

Delphine wondered what he had thought she was going to ask about when he let out a sigh of relief. “I was recruited to the Inquisition in Kirkwall. I was there during the mage uprising- I saw firsthand the devastation it caused. Cassandra sought a solution. When she offered me a position, I left the Templars to join her cause. Now it seems we face something far worse.”

So, fate put him in charge of a much bigger mess than he had originally expected. Interesting.

“The Divine dead… a giant hole in the sky. I would say we’re a bit worse off than before.”

“Which is why we’re needed. The Chantry lost control of both templars and mages. Now they argue over a new Divine while the Breach remains. The Inquisition could act when the Chantry cannot, our followers would be a part of that. There’s so much more we can- Forgive me. I doubt you were asking for a lecture…”

The man was passionate about helping, making a difference in a time of turmoil and crisis. It was reassuring to see people like him still exist after all the world had seen in recent years. Maybe that was why Elazar had become so friendly with him so quickly. He always was a good judge of character.

“Not quite, but if you have one prepared I wouldn’t mind.”

Delphine couldn’t help herself from letting out a little laugh with him. “Another time perhaps.”

This time she was sure he was smiling, the way his scar quirked up and his eyes gleamed reassured her there was still some mirth left in the soldier.

“I, ah…” and suddenly it had disappeared again. “There’s still a lot of work ahead. Should we return to the recruits?”

Delphine suppressed her groan as Cullen stood, her distraction had not worked quite well enough. “Of course.”

“Del!”

Both their heads shot towards the makeshift stables where Elazar stood, waving his arms frantically. He looked like an overly excited child to the point Delphine wanted to scold him. Varric stood next to the rambunctious elf, looking rather amused.

This time Delphine didn’t suppress her groan. “It would appear the Herald requires your assistance.”

“He could have come over and asked for me like an adult,” she huffed.

Cullen chuckled, shaking his head. Well, at least someone could draw amusement from her friend’s antics.

“Well, I’ve taken up enough of your time, Delphine.” Cullen bowed slightly at the waist, much more formal than he usually was with her. “Have a good rest of your day.”

Well that was odd.

Gathering up her skirt, Delphine jogged across the training yard to greet El and Varric. She still could not tell what the dwarf looked so smug about but at least Elazar had stopped his shouting.

“Must you always cause a scene?”

“Of course,” he smirked, “for I must always be the center of attention.”

Del rolled her eyes so hard it almost hurt. Elazar was not fond of the spotlight in all truth, but he was doing his best to embrace the attention his new title was earning him.

“So, how’s Curly doing?”

Delphine did not like the dwarf’s insulation with that tone. Varric liked to see tension and pining in relationships where none existed, as if they were living in a novel. Del was content seeing him do this with other Inquisition members but did not want the author snooping around her. It was bad enough he thought she and Elazar were together when she had first arrived.

“A one-track mind, as usual.”

Varric chuckled, “he has not changed one bit. First the templars, now the Inquisition.”

“How long have you two known each other exactly?” Cullen had never spoken to her about Varric. Granted, Cullen did not go out of his way to strike up conversations with her, yet Varric loved to harp on the Commander.

“Oh Curly and I go way back,” Varric grinned as if he and the ex-templar were simply old pals.

“Sure…” How was it that the Inquisition had already collected such a gaggle of personalities? Or should she say how was it that Cassandra has collected such a group?

Delphine continued to ponder the subject as their party traveled to Val Royeaux the following day. Cassandra herself was easy enough to get along with. Her personality was gruff, sure, but she was rather understanding. At least for Delphine. Cassandra had little patience for Varric. Varric was well aware of that fact and it led to plenty of interesting conversations to pass the time. Solas would chime in from time to time, though mostly to disagree with the “child of the stone” or Elazar.

Elazar always took the jabs from the elven apostate in good faith, it wasn’t like Elazar had any ego to bruise. He had always been determined to befriend all he could, it was in his nature. He was persistent too. If Elazar was the type to flee at a few harsh words, he would have never befriended her to begin with. So, Elazar did his best to accommodate Solas’s remarks, no matter how snobby they became-which Delphine found a strange trait for an apostate but she was not about to mention that in current company- but even Elazar had a breaking point. As their travels continued Del could almost see the high-brow attitude begin to grate on Elazar, especially when Solas threw out a few scathing remarks about the Dalish. She did her best to get between the two, talking El through what information Leliana had gathered on the Chantry Mothers and etiquette for when they finally arrived. Not that any of the talk seemed to calm Elazar down, he never cared for authority, but at least he wouldn’t snap at her.

Varric, always reading between the lines began to pick up on the tension as well. Suddenly the dwarf avoided the topics of magic and elves completely, and with a rather wide berth. Del would have to thank him once they returned to Haven and the apostate was out of earshot.

She did breathe a strong sigh of relief when the city came into view on the horizon, which was rather ironic considering neither she nor El cared much for the idea of meeting with the Mothers. Cassandra was optimistic though, so Del did her best to match the Seeker’s energy as they arrived at the bridge leading up to Orlais’ crown jewel.

The last time Delphine had been to Val Royeaux life had been looking up for her, for her family. The whole family had made the trip across the Waking Sea in order to introduce Oweyn to the woman who would later become his wife. Del had been excited to meet her possible future sister-in-law, but more excited to see the gilded city all her tutors talked about. She’d been glued to the carriage window nearly the entire trip, vibrating with excitement in the way only a six-year-old can. Her mother had been scolding her for her behavior the entire time, attempting to get young Delphine to sit properly on the uncomfortable bench and stop creasing her pretty new dress.

Oh how her mother would scold her if she could see her now.

Walking into Val Royeaux in full enchanter armor, hood pulled low over her brow, her staff on full display over her shoulder, went against everything she had been told her life would be like. Delphine had never come back to Orlais to take part in society as she came of age as her mother had planned. Instead, she was standing side by side with a group of what could be considered political dissidents. The Maker works in mysterious ways.

“The city still mourns,” Cassandra observed. It did seem bleak, as if the dark skies reflected the mood of the people.

The mood of the people also seemed terrified. One Orlesian woman on the bridge screamed at the sight of them approaching.

“Just a guess, Seeker, but I think they all know who we are.”

“Your skills of observation never fail to impress me, Varric.”

Elazar snickered at Del’s side; she was tempted to elbow him like she used to when they were sitting together during lessons. The Inquisition agent approaching was the only thing making her think otherwise.

“My Lord Herald.” The agent kneeled in front of Cassandra and Elazar. He tensed but El didn’t voice his discomfort.

“You’re one of Leliana’s people. What have you found?”

“The Chantry Mothers await you, but… so do a great many templars.”

Ice washed over her. They were walking straight into the arms of an order that would gladly kill them both for being “rebels.”

“There are templars here?” Cassandra sounded surprised but not nearly as concerned as Delphine thought she should be. She was a seeker after all, wasn’t she aware of what those men were capable of?

“People seem to think the templars will protect them from- from the Inquisition. They’re gathering on the other side of the market. I think that’s where the templars intend to meet you,” the agent explained.

“They wish to protect the people? From us?”

Delphine understood that Cassandra strongly believed in what she was doing, that this all was sanctioned by the Divine, but could she not comprehend that others might be less trusting? After a blight, a civil war and the death of the Divine, people were worried. Delphine was worried.

Elazar sounded rather unperturbed, “we knew there would be some kind of reaction.”

“But I didn’t expect the templars to make an appearance.” Delphine agreed with the Seeker.

“The people may just be assuming what the templars will do. I’ve heard no concrete plans.”

“You think the Order’s returned to the fold, maybe?” Varric pondered, “to deal with us upstarts?”

Despite her unease Del couldn’t help but chuckle, “is that all we are? A band of upstarts the templars find annoying?”

Cassandra shook her head, “I know Lord Seeker Lucius. I can’t imagine him coming to the Chantry’s defense. Not after all that’s occurred… Return to Haven. Someone will need to inform them if we are… delayed.”

That was a rather kind way of putting it.

“As you say, my Lady.”

Leliana’s agent watched as their group proceeded into the market, but with the news they’d received Delphine couldn’t find it in herself to admire the grandeur of the capital. As the agent had said, a crowd awaited them on the far end of the market. The Mothers had set up a platform from which to decry the Inquisition from. Del kept herself as close to Elazar’s back as she could as they navigated their way to the platform.

“Good people of Val Royeaux, hear me! Together we mourn our Divine. Her naïve and beautiful heart silenced by treachery! You wonder what will become of her murderer. Well wonder no more!”

Delphine had been regretting this since the agent had spoken the word templar, now she was sure they shouldn’t have come. Cullen had been right.

“Behold the so-called Herald of Andraste! Claiming to rise where our beloved fell. We say this is a false prophet! The Maker would send no elf in our hour of need!”

“Shemlen.” Elazar cursed under his breath, fists clenching at nothing. Delphine slipped her hands around his, hoping to ease some of his sudden temper. It appeared to help some, his gripped loosened enough for her to intertwine her hand with his. His shoulders relaxed slightly as he looked up to the mother. “You say I am the enemy. The Breach in the sky is our true enemy. We must unite to stop it.”

“It’s true!” Cassandra’s voice rang out over the crowd, “the Inquisition seeks only to end this madness before it’s too late!”

“It is already too late!” The woman pointed to an amor clad group approaching. Delphine’s grip on Elazar tightened. She would not let them take him. “The templars have returned to the Chantry! They will face this “Inquisition” and the people will be safe once more!”

The group mounted the platform, stone-faced. They didn’t appear to be all that thrilled with the Mother’s declaration. Delphine’s jaw dropped as one walked up and sucker-punched the older woman. A startled hush fell over the crowd as a man in seeker armor clapped a templar on the shoulder.

“Still yourself. She is beneath us.”

This was not the templar order Delphine remembered.

“What’s the meaning of this?” Delphine cursed Elazar for drawing attention back onto them.

“Her claim to “authority” is an insult. Much like your own.” The Seeker shot back as he descended the platform, his armored companions following.

Cassandra started to give chase, “Lord Seeker Lucius, it’s imperative that we speak with-”

“You will not address me.”

This was the Lord Seeker?!

“Lord Seeker?”

“Creating a heretical movement, raising up a puppet as Andraste’s prophet. You should be ashamed. You should all be ashamed! The templars failed no one when they left the Chantry to purge the mages! You are the ones who have failed! You who’d leash out righteous swords with doubt and fear! If you came to appeal to the Chantry, you are too late. The only destiny here that demands respect is mine.”

This was the man who had led the templars away from their duties? This man had convinced them it was better to purge the remaining mages than to protect them? How in the world had this happened? What were the templars thinking?

“What we truly need is an alliance that will seal the Breach.” Elazar countered, his voice remaining level despite the way he held Delphine’s hand in a death grip behind his back.

“On, the Breach is indeed a threat. But you certainly have no power to do anything about it,” the Lord Seeker sneered.

One of the templars stepped forward, brow tight knit, “but Lord Seeker… what if he really was sent by the Maker? What if-?”

“You are called to a higher purpose! Do not question!” Another templar shouted back.

Delphine had to let go of Elazar’s hand before she cut off his circulation.

“I will make the Templar Order a power that stands alone against the void. We deserve recognition. Independence! You have shown me nothing, and the Inquisition… less than nothing. Templars! Val Royeaux is unworthy of our protection! We march!”

In that moment, Delphine had never wanted a staff blade more. That man would destroy the Order and would kill as many mages as he could in the process.

Cassandra looked crestfallen but did not attempt to stop them from leaving again. There was obviously nothing she could say to the Lord Seeker to change his mind.

“Charming fellow, isn’t he?” Varric chimed in, unnervingly not all that disturbed by the Lord Seeker’s intentions.

“Has Lord Seeker Lucius gone mad?”

Elazar looked to Cassandra, concern etched into his features, “do you know him very well?”

“He took over the Seekers of Truth two years ago, after Lord Seeker Lambert’s death. He was always a decent man, never given to ambition and grandstanding. This is very bizarre.”

“Do you think he can be reasoned with?” Elazar continued to press but Delphine had little hope after that exchange.

“I hope so. If not him, there are surely others in the order who don’t feel as he does.”

“I hope so.” Delphine hated to see them fall to such a man.

“Either way, we should first return to Haven and inform the others.”

.

They didn’t return to Haven.

At least not until they had run around Val Royeaux in search of clues detailed in a mysterious arrow that had been shot in their general direction and received an invitation to a party being thrown by the Madame De Fer.

“So, the clues point to this estate here, just outside the city.” Varric and Elazar had huddled over a map in one of the cafes, both drawn into the mystery of it all. “So long as it’s not a trap it should allow us ample time to still make it to the party Del is so insistent on attending.”

Delphine threw her hands up and her friends’ insinuation, “I am trying to help you and the Inquisition, El. If attending this party gives us the chance to meet with Madame De Fer then we need to be there.”

They both knew full well the Madame De Fer was the Enchanter to the Imperial Court and was in a place far beyond the reach of any other mage. If they could gain her help it would be invaluable. Yet Delphine knew El was hung up over the idea of approaching a “loyal” Circle mage, his rebellious tendencies getting the better of him.

“Then we should best prepare for whatever it is we will be facing tonight.” Elazar declared, a wide grin gracing his features. He always did love a good mystery.

Cassandra and Solas nod in agreement, everyone gathering their things as the citizens of Val Royeaux look on in curiosity, just as they had been doing all afternoon. As they neared the stables to collect their mounts, Solas and Varric spun around to the sound of approaching footsteps.

“If I might have a moment of your time?”

Delphine recognized the elven woman approaching them immediately. Her blood began to boil all over again.

“Grand Enchanter Fiona?”

First the Lord Seeker and now the Grand Enchanter? How had Val Royeaux not imploded after having them in the same place at the same time?

“Leader of the mage rebellion. Is it not dangerous for you to be here?” Solas had a valid point.

“I heard of this gathering, and I wanted to see the fabled Herald of Andraste with my own eyes. If its help with the Breach you seek, perhaps you should look among your fellow mages.”

That’s the angle she was using then. Delphine frowned at the older woman, “I’m surprised the leader of the mages wasn’t at the Conclave.”

Cassandra also seemed rather suspicious of the development. “Yes. You were supposed to be, and yet somehow you avoided death.”

“As did the Lord Seeker, you’ll note. Both of us sent negotiators in our stead, in case it was a trap. I won’t pretend I’m not glad to live. I lost many dear friends that day. It disgusts me to think the templars will get away with it. I’m hoping you won’t let them.”

“So you think the templars are responsible?” Elazar asked.

“Why wouldn’t she?” Cassandra countered.

“Lucius hardly seems broken up over his loses, if he’s concerned about them at all.” Delphine did have to admit, the Grand Enchanter has a point. “You heard him. You think he wouldn’t happily kill the Divine to turn people against us? So, yes, I think did it. More than I think you did it, at any rate.”

“The mages weren’t willing to talk to the Inquisition before. Why now?” This had bothered Elazar since they had discussed it in the war room. He had been in the rebel camp; he knew how their peers wanted change yet there was no move from the rebels to help seal the Breach. If the mages wanted respect then wasn’t this the perfect opportunity for them? El had voiced his frustration on the subject many of the nights they sat together and discussed their situations.

“Because now I’ve seen what you are. And I’ve seen the Chantry for what it is. Consider this an invitation to Redcliffe: come meet with the mages. An alliance could help us both, after all. I hope to see you there. Au revoir my Lord Herald.”

As quickly as she had appeared, Fiona disappeared back into Val Royeaux.

[Masterlist]

[jewish-gay-elves]

an explosive way to kick off your new career

“tristan was the original potential recruit since he had just been made an enchanter, levins been an enchanter for a bit longer but his plan with jowen still went south fast) drabble starting like in the middle of jowan doing blood magic to escape n shit and like tristan has already agreed to go with the wardens but THEN BIG EXPLOSION” - my notes on this au

Words: 1232, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 3 of the a tale of too many wardens because i want everyone to be happy and heres how

Fandoms: Dragon Age: Origins, Dragon Age (Video Games) Rating: Teen and Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: None Characters: Tristan Amell, Male Amell, Duncan (Dragon Age), Irving (Dragon Age), Greagoir (Dragon Age), Jowan, Levin Surana, Male Surana, Lily (Dragon Age) Relationships: None Additional Tags: just how tristan and levin get conscripted, tristan is a good kid, levin wants to raise some hell

 “Alright, if that’s settled and you’re going to take one of our most talented young enchanters then I guess-”     BOOM!

    “What in the world was that?” said Knight Commander Greagoir, his hand reaching for the sword at his side.

    “It sounded like it came from the basement below, Greagoir, we must hurry, there’s only one exit they could use,” First Enchanter Irving said, turning to his counterpart. Tristan glanced at the Warden whom he had just been given to practically, and before his new custodian could say anything, Tristan rushed after the First Enchanter and Knight Commander. Without looking behind him, he could hear the Warden rushing to follow.

    As they reached the entrance to the basement, Tristan could see three figures crouched by the door. Knight Commander Greagoir drew his sword and began to bellow at them.

    “Alright now, get out here before I have to put a Silence on the whole area. You should know that it doesn’t feel pleasant, even if it’s what you deserve for breaking the rules like this,” he shouted to them.

    “Please Greagoir, I’m sure that there is an explanation for this grievous breach of trust,” Irving said, trying to reconcile with him. One of the three figures, clearly the shortest one, stood up finally and Tristan recognized him as Levin, one of the other Junior Enchanters, but one who was probably going to be lifted to Senior Enchanter soon. One of the figures behind him tried to grab his arm to pull him back into the shadows but Levin shook him off and stood tall.

    “Levin, what are you doing down there, son?” Irving asked, his face contorting into something much sadder.

    “Don’t call me son, First Enchanter. We’re leaving, and there’s nothing you can do to stop us,” Levin called out. Beside him, the other two figures finally stood up to show their faces as well. Tristan recognized them both as Jowan, one of the apprentices, and Lily, one of the Chantry sisters who worked in the chapel.

    “Lily and I love each other, and we deserve a life together!” Jowan called out defiantly, even though his voice cracked part-way through. Tristan frowned, he had never thought that Lily would go against her vows like that.

    “Not gonna happen whelp,” Knight Commander Greagoir growled, before he motioned to the other templars to begin moving closer.

    “St-Stay back!” Jowan yelped, trying to keep Lily behind him. Levin reached for Jowan to pull him closer, so that Levin could fight the templars, seeing has he had infinitely more skill than the apprentice. Jowan startled at his touch, and screamed out of fright, drawing a knife out from who knows where.

    Tristan could see the Grey Warden next to him begin to move closer, but before anyone could blink, Jowan slashed at his own palm and cast a spell, using the blood spilling from himself. Tristan had never thought that the cowardly apprentice could ever think to resort to blood magic, but Jowan was able to knock out all of the templars that had been inching closer, including Knight Commander Greagoir and First Enchanter Irving. All Tristan could think to do was run to the side of his old mentor who had collapsed on the ground.

    “Blood magic?! Jowan! You swore that you would never!” Lily exclaimed, looking sick to her stomach. Jowan tried to reach for her, simpering apologies about how he had to, but Lily just put her hands out to push him away.

    “Get out of my sight! The Maker would not forgive such a sin!” she said trying to push him away, Jowan looked like he still wanted to convince her, but Levin grabbed his arm before he could.

    “Jowan, this is your chance to get out of here, I suggest you take it before they all wake up. I’ll keep them from following. Now go!” He said, looking Jowan in the eyes, then shoving him away, towards the doors. Jowan just sobbed and turned tail to run. Levin still stood tall, while behind him, Lily finally fell to the floor sobbing at the consequences of her actions. Behind Tristan, the Grey Warden still stood, not moving to go after Jowan, but instead staring at Levin.

    “So you’ll let him go?” Levin asked, staring the older man down.

    “I am no templar, errant mages are not of any concern. Only the Blight,” Duncan said.

    “You already have Amell, why are you still here then?” Levin asked defensively, starting to become visibly uncomfortable under the Warden’s stare.

    “Because you want to live, don’t you?” Duncan asked, confusing everyone. Before Levin could ask more, the templars and First Enchanter Irving began to awaken from their stunned state.

    “Where’d he go?! Where’d he go?!!” Knight Commander Greagoir began barking as he struggled to stand up in his bulky templar’s armor.

    “Clearly he has escaped, Greagoir, we can only send out templars to search for him now. I doubt he could have gotten far, as we all know, Jowan was not really the brains behind this operation.” At Irving’s words, Levin stood taller.

    “These two didn’t do any blood magic though!” Greagoir grumbled. “She however, is going straight to Aeonar. And she isn’t in your jurisdiction Irving so there’s nothing you can do about that decision. You two, take her away,” Greagoir commanded to two of his men. Lily’s sobs only grew louder, but she was compliant to go with them. The rest of the templars were still in a tentative circle around Levin, who looked completely lost in thought.

    “Levin, I must tell you that I am very disappointed in you,” First Enchanter Irving said, looking to Greagoir, a bit at a loss for a solution.

    “This is practically treason! Mutiny! We are well within our rights to make him Tranquil for this, Senior Enchanter candidacy be damned!” Greagoir shouted at Irving. Levin’s gaze then snapped to Duncan’s face, as though he suddenly understood everything.

    “I want to live,” he said, seemingly pleading with them.

    “You’ll still be alive, idiot, being Tranquil doesn’t-” Greagoir started, only to get cut off by Duncan.

    “Actually gentlemen, I am afraid I am going to conscript another of your mages today,” he said, calmly, almost without a care. Tristan was startled by this, looking to Irving who was standing beside him to see that the old man’s eyes were twinkling like they did when someone solved one of their equations correctly.

    “What?!” Greagoir shouted, clearly not okay with the idea.

    “Well, I guess that takes him out of our hands then, Knight Commander,” Irving said, hiding his grin.

    “Wha-?” Greagoir could barely get the word out of his mouth before Duncan began speaking again.

    “Now, if there are no further interruptions, I would like to take these two to Ostagar, to fight off the Darkspawn, as you two know well enough,” Duncan said, turning to leave, expecting Tristan and Levin to follow. Knight Commander Greagoir was still sputtering as Tristan shook Irving’s hand and turned to jog and catch up with Levin and Duncan, who had already started to leave.

    “Why do I feel like I’ve just jumped from the pot into the fire,” Levin grumbled as they made their way downstairs. Tristan could only shrug his shoulders, still mystified by Duncan’s actions.

    “At least the fire doesn’t have Knight Commander Greagoir,” Tristan said following Duncan down the stairs.

[blarfkey]

A ⭐ for you (I'm curious about Thick as Thieves, in particular!) Have a lovely day/night!

So I don’t have a particular section of the story for Thick as Thieves that I am compelled to talk about that already published and I can’t give spoilers, so . . .

I am going to give a Ted Talk on Why A Dwarf Love Interest For Solas is Amazing and Wonderful and Should Have Been Canon

So when I first played DA:I, I was a dwarf because I love dwarves. I was also a dwarf warden and kind of pissed that I was stuck as a human in DA2, even though I love Hawke.

And I was immediately drawn to Solas, as we all are probably, and he wouldn’t romance me. What bullshit. What UTTER bullshit. Actually, if you’re a dwarf, your love interests are super limited compared to the other races which is also utter bullshit.

So for many years I grumbled about it before I started writing Thick as Thieves and as I wrote this fic, I realized that a dwarf inquisitor has this . . .neutrality with Solas, for lack of a better word, that I don’t think the other races have, or have as much of.

Look, we all know that Solas did not join the Inquisition to make friends. In fact, any personal connection he has with any other member is pretty much made against his will and/or better judgement. He thinks it’s part of the deception, he thinks it’s temporary, until he’s hit in the face with the ferocity and sincerity of his own feelings and by then it’s too late to back out. He does this with Cassandra, with Iron Bull, with Cole, with Varric, and even with Dorian.

But even as he is unwillingly pulled into relationships by the sheer depth of his loneliness, he still keeps his distance. He still has walls put in place. The only time we see the walls come down is with Lavellan and then he breaks up with her immediately afterward.

Of course, the real reason for these walls is because he’s Fen’Harel, bent on their destruction. But Solas uses all kinds of excuses with the Inquisitor and the other characters to keep his distance.  (Cole might be the one exception because he is also the only one who knows who Solas really is)

For a human Inquisitor, he has the fact that human and elf relations have been absolute garbage for the last 1000 years. Human Inquisitors have a lot of ingrained prejudice to get over when it comes to elves, even if they don’t think they are particularly racist. It’s ingrained in their culture and religion. The Chantry has also taught humans to hate and fear magic so Solas gets a double whammy of being both and elf and a mage and that’s even more reason to be cautious with a human.

Solas also doesn’t like the Qun and he has his own fucked up prejudices when it comes to Qunari and how much he doesn’t trust them. Secretly, I think he’s rather afraid of them and that they remind him too much of the Evanuris. And he can’t let that go even when the Inquisitor is Tal Vashoth.

We’ve all seen Solas’s clownery with the Dalish Inquisitor. This is where the “hah’ren” Solas comes into play. I think he plays up the older, wiser mentor more with an elf inquisitor because that’s also a way to keep formality between them, to remind himself of their differences despite being of the same race. Lavellan is the only canonical romance so she’s the closest he’s come in canon to closing his distance. Even so, that moment is rife with culture clash and Solas Knowing Better About Your Own Traditions Than You Do, so there is still that wall.

Mage Inquisitors also have the same problem of Solas pulling the whole wise mentor thing because he knows so much more about magic than you. And no matter how skillful you are, you will never match him in a gazillion years. And on top of that, a mage Inquisitor is supposed to be the First for their Keeper, which widens the culture clash gap mentioned earlier. Not only are you Dalish, but you are the heir to the Keeper of Dalish Culture, so you’re even more aggressively Dalish than a hunter. Solas definitely keeps his distance from that.

But with dwarves, and with Shay in particular I guess, he doesn’t have the same opportunities to push you away. Dwarves and Elves don’t have a long complicated history of war and slavery. I mean, we don’t know what went down between them before Arlathan fell, but in the centuries since then, they’ve been fairly neutral.

The Inquisitor is a surface dwarf, and even though some dwarves -- like Varric -- are Andrastian, it’s not the default religion for surface dwarves. A dwarf inquisitor has not been socialized by the Chantry to hate elves. Even though they could definitely pick up on that prejudice by just living in the world around them, it’s also possible that they have grown up free of a lot of the influence of the Chantry.

Dwarves cannot do magic and they don’t dream at all. Some are noticeably freaked out by magic because of this, but it’s also not something that is socialized into them by religion. It’s a fear they can develop because they don’t understand it. But not all dwarves would have it and so not all of them view mages with the same kind of prejudice that is ingrained in most human societies. 

So what does Solas have to put distance between him and a dwarf? He can’t be their mentor because they’re not elven or magical. He can’t use the excuse of a bad history or lack of trust because it’s possible to have a dwarf inquisitor free of ingrained prejudice against both elves and mages. Their culture as a whole is not something he violently disapproves of, like the Qun, so he can’t use that.

Solas has nothing. He has no reason besides the fact that Dwarves can’t interact with the Fade and he loves the Fade to really push them away -- but the dwarf inquisitor can in fact interact with the Fade. So that’s out.

There is a noticeable difference in the balcony conversation with a dwarf than all the other races. Of course, Solas still puts his foot in his mouth and has his own prejudices. But it’s so mild compared to being called a literal savage or a brute. The best he’s got is that dwarves are practical and they don’t dream. It’s so less problematic than the others.

This was really fun to play with when I created Shay because on top of all that, Shay is also aggressively friendly. Once Solas is hit with the full force of her determination to befriend and understand him, he has nothing in his arsenal to protect himself from it. It is open season for him.

It’s something that I wish I could have seen in-game because Solas has very few excuses to hide behind with dwarf and I think that greatly impacts his romance with one. It forces him to be more honest about his own feelings and it gives him a lot of conflict because it’s harder to give them up when he as no distance to cling to after the fact.

We were robbed, that’s all I’m saying.

[ohsweetflips]

DAO really was the best game, the lore the ability to absolutely wreck shit, the fact that they didnt do that bullshit ‘all sides are grey’ and clearly showed oppression. I think of my warden, an elven mage, and wonder how she’ll be rewritten more than anything.

right like!!!! i love each dragon age game with my whole heart and they all have super special places in said heart, but origins handles a lot of the social problems really well, or at least from the perspective that i play it as (also an elven mage!)

the rest i’m putting under the cut bc holy shit i can talk abt dragon age a lot. also nothing is proofred. i’m so sorry this got so long i hear “bioware” and “grey morality” and i go wild

(pls talk to me abt dragon age.....)

(also please don’t reblog this!!)

like i understand da2 having a type of grey-morality thing bc the final battle was choosing between the mages and the templars (tho imo they could’ve done better than “the mages hate us bc we keep them locked in a tower and there are multiple accounts of us abusing them and therefore some of them turn to blood magic so therefore we should kill all of them” but still, in a setting like that where the Main End Game Choice was mages vs. templars, then that is understandable)

(but also i haven’t played da2 in a couple years so maybe it’s more nuanced than that)

but inquisition! it’s weird bc inq has a super special place in my heart. i’ve played it 6 or 7 times to completion, not counting the other times i got 20/30 hours into it before external forces distracted me. inq is overall the game i think abt the most, most of my playthroughs average over 100 hours, it’s the only game that i have all the dlcs for, for me it’s the easiest to replay, and yet there’s so much that frustrates me abt it! like, i’m gonna avoid talking abt the actual parts of the writing that bother me, bc that can be it’s own standalone thing, but imo it felt like they never actually solidified what actually caused the mage/templar war? there are those that say anders started it (seems likely), then there are those who talk abt fiona leading the rebel mages in the war? and there, of course, is the “the templars have done wrong but so have they mages and therefore you’re shamed either way for what you do” like i Get what they’re trying to do, trying to encourage players to explore their options and really delve into their own moral values of the game and not just adhere to what the game says, but idk the way they always went abt it always rubbed me some type of wrong

i think part of it is bc, when people mention circle mages turning to blood mages and demons and such like that, it was always framed as “ah these evil mages!” and not “[if these are circle mages] most likely their want for freedom pushed them to that”

does that make it right? no, not necessarily! look at uldred from dao! imo, he was wrong! i don’t like the circle and my warden herself has a complicated relationship with it, but i like that you can say “hey! this is wrong!” without legitimate plot-based “but what if it isn’t?”

of course there will always be companions who push for the more chaotic/harsh choices (morrigan is the one i have the most experience with giving me disapproval for being what i think is nice) (still love her tho), but i think dao handled “okay, look at the big picture, and really think abt what hill u want to die on” stance well

and then there’s the way the mage/templar thing is handled in inquisition vis a vis companions. specifically cullen. and, listen, i as a player have a very complicated relationship with cullen and my heros do too lmao. and i really don’t want to get into the nuances of that bc that can 1) turn into a fight i don’t feel like having and 2) can be it’s own discussion, but basically, from my own perspective, he’s a well-written character who makes for a good antag to a mage-siding hawke in da2 bc of how pro-templar/anti-mage he is. again, don’t agree with any of it (honestly da2 alone puts me on the “okay fuck this” level w/ his character), but it does offer an extreme that is interesting to see. origins is more complicated bc in a game not directly stepped in mage/templar and also a game that stems from 6 different origin stories, it’s very easy to be a non-mage and be like “why do i care abt this guy” (if you get what i’m saying? like i got immediately invested in saving the mages bc my first warden was a circle mage so i was very put off by being told to kill all of them, as compared to if i played a non-mage origin and didn’t really have that background knowledge). but overall, origins and da2 puts cullen on the “pro-templars, mages are more dangerous than they are good side.” and then inquisition is where things get interesting!!

and, for a quick ref, i’m very into getting invested in my characters and really figuring out their morals and what they would actually do, or at least think, so dai becomes interesting bc i play as another elven mage who has never stepped foot in a circle and never will. so, bc of that, i play him as naturally more inclined to not initially Think abt cullen’s past like as a templar bc, as a dalish mage, i hc that he does not know what actually goes on in circles (as compared to my warden, a circle mage, and my hawke, an apostate) (but i hc that, overtime, as he has more and more experiences with templars, he becomes more cognizant of that) (but bioware doesn’t give me the option to just dictate everything my camris lavellan is thinking akjsjkdjk)

and dai-cullen, imo, is actually very interesting! and, tbh, i do have to give it to bioware. i feel like i’m abt to say an unironic controversial opinion, and i feel like i’ve already talked abt the nuances of all of this, but i do think dai did well at reworking cullen’s character. however, i feel like that was also done to feed into the grey-ness of the mage/templars. and, imo, i think they almost did well at actually making cullen show regret for how he treated mages. almost. again, i think there’s a lot of nuance! bc we do see him show some type of regret for how he treated a mage!warden (if he said all that shit like “all these people’s blood are on your hands” if u talk abt not wanting to kill innocent mages) and we do see him step away from templar life (that is, if you tell him to stop taking lyrium)

but!!!! there’s One Thing that puts a thorn in this, and it’s that cullen says something along the lines of, “meredith wasn’t all wrong, she had reason” like bitch!!! no matter what side you choose in da2, you fucking fight meredith!!! she’s wanted to kill innocent mages/make them tranquil even before anders blew up the chantry!!! meredith was all wrong!! she was evil!!!!! she was objectively a harmful person!!!!!!!!! bioware really makes this bitch the final boss of da2 and then has the audacity to say “but maybe she wasn’t all bad” in dai like WHERE IS THIS FOR ORSINO??? ORSINO ISN’T ALL BAD, IS HE???????? OH BUT HE IS BC HE RESORTED TO SUDDEN BLOOD MAGIC IN THE LAST TEN MINUTES OF THE GAME, AS COMPARED TO MEREDITH WHO WAS A DANGER FOR THE ENTIRE FINAL ACT and i digress but the fact that bioware is trying to redeem cullen but also showing that he still sympathizes with a woman who 1) turned against the templars and 2) Literally Everything She Did To The Mages always makes me “hmmmm are u really trying tho :/”

also tho one thing i’m actually not the biggest fan of is that cullen is like “oh i knew hawke in passing........ knew varric in passing.............” meanwhile let’s just cut to everything that happened at kirkwall. this is my own opinion bc i see varric as hawke’s #1 but i personally think that at least half of the comraderie varric and cullen sorta-kinda-had in inq was varric testing the waters of “okay what is cullen going to be like if and when hawke shows up”

also tho i will say a hot-take of mine is that if cullen gets to be redeemed by bioware, then i want something for anders, too, but i doubt bioware would do something so clearly pro-mage. but it could be two sides of the extreme! extremist templar gets redemption, extremist mage does, too! come on, bioware, show your grey morality

(again, i think it’s interesting what they did with cullen in dai and does give some sympathetic light but i also do think the reworking of his character was working towards bioware’s moral-greyness agenda with dragon age. not that that’s necessarily a terrible thing, i understand them wanting some nuance, but it’s the way they do it. like, you can show bad templars and bad mages and still not have “but who is really the bad guy? the oppressors or the oppressed? who is it really?”)

(and also just bc i feel like i need to put my own player claim in this, my opinion on cullen is complicated and also i’m gonna be completely forth-right with u, dear anon, i appreciate cullen in inquisition but, as a whole, he can be terrible to ur warden in dao (that’s not me being shifty it literally just depends on the choice you make in broken circle) and in da2 he’s a nightmare, so bioware had to do a lot of legwork in dai) (tbh tho in my personal-player opinion, if i was to ever romance cullen in inq, it’s not gonna be with a mage)

god this got so out of hand anon i’m so sorry you probably didn’t want this messy essay but i just love talking abt dragon age!!! i think abt it a lot and i have five years worth of headcanons and i have a family tree set up for my surana/lavellan bc of some bullshit i pulled and also!!!! bioware’s writing can get so frustrating but i also think it’s so interesting to pull apart and discuss bc i think the bioware has actually shifted from pro-mage (origins) to neutral-mage (da2 kinda) to anti-mage (dai) and i feel like So Many Choices with characters and their plots reveal that!!! so it’s a frustrating agenda but i also just love dragon age so much that i can’t help but get excited and talk abt it!!!

like, as all things, i do believe there are times when grey morality does work, but, at least from a mage-siding perspective, it hasn’t really landed well for dragon age. bc, and i don’t want to drag in real-life scenarios bc i feel like it would be incredibly inappropriate of me to use any oppressed minority as a comparison for a fantasy world, but it’s the age-old thing of people saying the shitty “but the oppressed fight back and therefore they’re just as bad as the oppressors!” and that’s like....... not how it works.

but also you’ve caught me in a wonderful mood so i feel like, if i was in a bad mood, this would be a lot more “and fucking bioware can’t make a goddamn decision on what side they actually support so instead most of the companions are gonna made rude remarks abt you supporting mages and the ones that support you are seen as distrustful and fuck this and fuck that” but i think that is the joy of loving something with you’re whole heart and also saying “there are so many things abt this that piss me off and so many things that i would change”

and also!!!! ik bioware probably killed my warden so like rip electra surana but i would love for the warden to make an appearance in da4 as a temporary companion/advisor. but! but!!!!!! i also don’t know how much i trust bioware with my “elven mage who is alistair’s mistress and preferred the mages and wanted to free the circles and etc etc etc” bc... idk how to explain it? like, i don’t want them taking my warden and putting words in her mouth that go against choices i meticulously made in dao

[roachfurby]

It seems to me that the epilogue with the creation of a hospital for the Templars is more suitable for Samson than for Cullen. But Bioware could not allow anyone to become better than their holy Cullen. What do you think?

TLDR GOING HERE BC I RANTED SORRY (rant under cut): 

First off, sorry for taking so long to reply, I accidentally took my night time meds instead of my day time meds earlier and my ability to function and like. articulate thoughts has not been ideal lmao. also im still really fucky so if i sound like a crackhead im sorry lol

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I’d have switched Samson and Cullen’s Inquisition roles immediately if given the option. Why bioware is so obsessed with him is absolutely befuddling to me - especially when it came to inquisition.

Cullen’s story arc was completed in DA2, imo, while Samson’s was just beginning. Cullen didn’t really DO any growth in Inquisition other than the whole quitting lyrium thing, and even then it’s just like. One cut scene and a bit of war table banter? He still hates mages. He’s still heavily supports the templars. Nothing about him changes or grows, even if you romance him as a mage. If you romance him as a mage, he sees you as an exception, and then continues to spout bigoted nonsense about how dangerous mages are. 

Samson had so much more potential for growth, and would have fit into the “Progressive Commander” role much more easily given his notable (though imperfect) support of mages in DA2. His issue with lyrium are also already shown in DA2, and his struggle to quit lyrium as commander in inquisition would have had much more impact on him as a character and on players emotionally. The lyrium rehab would have been a massive accomplishment and source of pride for him, something with strong ties to his background and his struggles, while for cullen it seems more like an afterthought imho.

As for a romance route, the potential for angst+comfort is so fucking good. Struggling with lyrium withdrawal? Feelings of inadequacy in his position? Templar guilt? Overwhelmed by Everything? SO much comfort potential. Not to mention the fact that the reason he was kicked from the templars in the first place was bc he was smuggling love letters to and from a mage and his lover - thats romantic as hell?? Absolutely lovely?? He was willing to take a massive risk to let two lovers keep in contact, got booted out of the templars for it, continued to support mages, and even tried to save one of them after the world went to shit, and they choose Creepen Stalkerford (shout out to fem!surana/amell lol) instead?? the fuck. 

Maybe its because Cullen was a useful pawn to make it easier to force the whole grey morality thing. Leliana is a mage supporter, and Josephine speaks in favor of the mages a few times. Maybe to them Cassandra (and Viv. and bull. and Sera.) wasn’t enough of a pro-templar influence, or they felt they needed a staunchly pro-templar adviser, not a companion. No matter the reason, he honestly feels shoehorned in - they suspiciously do not have anyone mentioning the darker parts of his past in the game, they dont have anyone speaking out against him, it’s as if they tried to wipe all of the problematic (and honestly, evil) parts of his past away to make room for this new Courageous Tortured Soul who wants to speak out against the “injustices of the chantry against templars” or whatever the fuck. 

Meanwhile, there is a wonderful option to allow character growth for a man who has done little wrong other than to send refugee mages to shifty people (but where else could he send them?) and has suffered at the hands of the chantry far, far worse. Cullen left of his own accord, after years of being in power. Samson was tossed out into the streets, lyrium addicted, for allowing lovers to keep in contact. And what do they do with this character? the sidekick to the shittiest main villain in the damn franchise. The wasted potential is sickening!!!!

Fuck, even if Samson wasn’t the commander, the potential for him to be brought in by the inquisition as a companion or even perhaps an agent would have been leagues better!! Personal or war table missions (depending on if hes a companion or agent) relating to lyrium and helping him and/or other addicts recover safely, the Inquisition showing support for those seeking aid by creating the rehabilitation centers. Less of a chance of people falling prey to tainted lyrium and joining corypheus if there are safe alternatives available, yes? And, as for the grey morality scale bioware wants with the companions? Just have him be an optional companion! That way, if a player wanted their inquisition to be heavily pro-templar (freaks) then they could just say “no thanks” and be on their way, personal morality in tact. 

Not to mention that any of these options would make it so that everyone would get Calpernia as secondary villain, who honestly feels much more deep and fulfilling as a villain.

anyway ive exhausted my 2 brain cells for the day. please grab a nice tall glass of Loving Samson Juice on ur way out :)

[degenerate-perturbation]

Chapters: 12/? Fandom: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins - Awakening Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: Female Amell/Female Surana Characters: Female Amell, Female Surana, Anders, Velanna, Nathaniel Howe, Oghren (Dragon Age), Justice (Dragon Age), Sigrun (Dragon Age) Additional Tags: Established Relationship, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Self-Harm, Blood Magic Series: Part 2 of void and light, blood and spirit Summary: Amell and Surana are out of the Circle, and are now free to build a life together. But when the prison doors fly open, what do you have in common with the one shackled next to you, save for the chains that bound you both?

Yvanne fled.

Her loose robe tangled among her legs, and her slippers did nothing to protect her clumsy feet from the hewn stone of the castle’s passageways, but her only thought was to escape. More than once she slammed her shoulder into a wall, hard enough that it would bruise. She made it to the stables and was wrestling her favored rowan mare into a saddle when it occurred to her just what it was, that she was sacrificing. She was leaving everyone behind. Didn’t she owe it to them to explain?

No—she didn’t owe anyone shit, she decided, and anyway, she couldn’t stand the shame, couldn’t stand to be cared about, couldn’t stand to be loved. Her first and only need was to be far away from here, immediately.

The mare was recalcitrant, feeling its rider’s disturbed mood in that careful way horses had. Yvanne calmed it with a spell, all but took the mare’s mind with her so-called healing magic, and as soon as she mounted, it was off. Yvanne could barely stay upright as it bolted. Belatedly she realized that the main gate was down, and barely in time cast a spell of pure force. The gate exploded open, and only magic kept the mare from panicking and throwing her.

She clung to the horse’s neck, galloping down the road in the dead of night. What road, she couldn’t say, only that it lead away from Vigil’s Keep. The air rushed past her, stealing her warmth, deafening her senses.

All she could think of was Loriel’s face. Are you telling me to go? And the long, meaningful silence that had followed.

Every time she remembered it—and this was every handful of seconds, now—it hurt all over again.

She had tried so hard! She had done everything right! She had supported her at every turn, even when it had been hard, even when it hurt. Because they had been through so much together, because their lives were each other’s, because this thing between them mattered.

And this thing between them, wrested from the jaws of Chantry and Circle both, this beautiful shining thing so precious and so rare so hard won and mysterious—Loriel had thrown it away like it was nothing. And Yvanne had let her.

How could she just throw it away?

How could it mean nothing?

How? How? How? The question rattled around in her head like a deafening echo, so total and central to her attention, that she failed to notice the lowered quality of the road ahead—how could she, in the dark?—and the mare’s leg disappeared into a sinkhole. She barely heard the snap of broken bone as she was thrown from the panicking mare.

Pain exploded in her shoulder and head. She’d landed not exactly well, but not badly, either—she was still alive. She sat catching her breath, feeling the pain radiate from her shoulder across her whole body, barely noticed the layers of skin scraped away in the fall. The mare was worse off; its eyes rolled wildly in pain and bewilderment, laying on its side.

She healed herself first, then went to the horse. Normally an injury like this was death to the animal; the bone would never heal right. Even magical healing was essentially normal healing but faster. She was a decent healer, but not amazing; the shoulder she’d just healed was still stiff and smarting, and probably would be that way for a while. It would have been kindest to let the poor animal die.

“Sorry, old girl,” she said, gathering a cohort of wisps to help her.

After several minutes of struggle, the mare was up again. The leg hadn’t healed quite properly, and the horse’s eyes were filmed with pain. But there were spells for that.

She remounted, and rode hard. The mare didn’t stop or slow or stumble, enveloped as she was with layers and layers of creation magic. Yvanne didn’t know how long the magic or the mare would last, and she didn’t care.

By the time the sun broke over the horizon, she had driven the animal at full gallop for nearly the whole night, and no amount of magic could keep it from expiring of exhaustion out from under her.

This time the fall was less abrupt, the poor creature slowing gradually and collapsing. Yvanne narrowly avoided being crushed beneath it, scrambling to heal it again—but there was no hope this time. The mare was dead, and Yvanne couldn’t bring back the dead.

She sat by the side of the road, leaning against the corpse of the mare, and cried. The mare had been a good horse, sweet-tempered and faithful, and for almost no reason at all Yvanne had killed it. Suddenly the mare’s death was the greatest tragedy in the history of all Thedas, made all the worse by the beauty of the sunrise and song of the morning lark. Yvanne sobbed until she couldn’t stand it anymore.

After a while she looked up. The sun had fully risen by now, but the air was still cold. Gradually it dawned on her just what a bad way she was in—half-dressed, not a thing to her name, filthy and tired and hungry, stranded on the highway in the middle of nowhere in particular. The whole ride her head had been filled with the grand emotional tragedies of love and loss and disappointment, but all that faded rapidly, to be replaced by a prosaic, deeply banal fear.

Whatever was going to become of her?

She looked back the way she’d come. Her whole life was there, her friends, her things, her vocation. Everything she’d built, everything she’d striven for, was back at Vigil’s Keep.

That way was barred to her now.

She could stay here with the dead horse, or she could go on.

Struggling up, she faced the road before her, and began to walk.

—

She walked for most of the morning. By now her thirst had outstripped her hunger. Her throat was parched, and she struggled not to sway as she walked. Even magic was no help; weakened as she was by her own rash foolishness, her mana restored too slowly to be of any use.

When the sun was nearly at its zenith, she heard the creak of wagon wheels and clop of horse’s hooves behind her.

There was nowhere to go; this section of the road crossed through wide open plains and gently rolling hills. Even if she’d wanted to hide she couldn’t have. She had no sword, no weapon at all, and all her half-forgotten training as an arcane warrior was worthless without one.

Whatever was coming, she would have to deal with it.

She got out of the road, stepping over the gutter to stand in the grass. A cart leashed to a pair of mules approached. The driver was a round-bellied man dressed not richly, but neither like a peasant. His cart was well-laden, judging by the patient speed his mules walked with.

He slowed as he approached, tugging on the reins. “Ho there, stranger. What circumstance has brought an unaccompanied young lady of such beauty to travel alone and unladen?”

She struggled not to glare at him, looking at the ground. “My business is my own.”

He laughed. “Very well, then! Am I to assume that dead horse I saw some miles behind me was once yours?”

No point in lying. “Yes.”

The merchant sadly shook his head. “Poor creature. What happened to it?”

“It died.”

“Alright, then. I see you have the situation well in hand. I’ll be on my way.”

Electricity surged through her. “W-wait!” she stuttered, swallowing a great deal of pride as she did.

The merchant stopped halfway through flicking the reins.

Yvanne hung her head, humiliated. “Ser, where are you headed, if I may ask?”

“To Highever, my dear.”

“How far is it?”

“Not far, not far. Less than a day at an easy pace, by cart.”

Less than a day. She was closer to Highever than to Vigil’s Keep. Highever would do.

“Could you take me there?”

“I could,” the merchant said. “But how will you make it worth my while?”

She took off one of her amulets. She had bought it in Amaranthine, and Loriel had said it was one of the gaudiest things she’d ever seen, and Yvanne had retorted that surely she had, she’d seen the rest of Yvanne’s jewelry. “Will this do? It’s enchanted.” She went on, half-manic. “It protects the wearer from harm. Ask any enchanter when you get to Highever, they’ll tell you it’s real, I swear.”

The merchant’s eyes glinted as he saw the gem glitter on its chain. “Yes, that will do nicely.” He snatched it up,  as though she was going to take it back, and tucked it into his coat. Then he moved over in the driver’s seat to make room for her. “Come and sit by me, young lady. You can enchant me with conversation, as part of your payment for passage.”

She really just wanted to sleep in the back of the cart, but she could tell she had no choice. She took her seat.

“Will you do me the honor of telling me your name?” the merchant said.

“It’s...Leliana,” Yvanne said.

“Leliana. That’s a beautiful name. Is it Orlesian?”

“I dunno. I’ve never been to Orlais.”

That was the right thing to say; the merchant had been to Orlais, and was content to spend the next several minutes telling her all about the glory of the markets of Val Royeux, the colored silks, the fine clothing, the masks and intrigues of it all. While he prattled, Yvanne let herself relax.

“Forgive me—I’ve been rude,” the merchant said, startling her out of her stupor. “You must be weary.”

He offered her a waterskin, dried jerky, and bread that was only somewhat stale. All this she devoured so quickly it hurt going down. The merchant chuckled to see it, and she didn’t have nearly enough energy to be irritated at him for it. She was too busy being grateful.

The food and water granted her enough energy to restore her magical resources; at least enough that she could layer enough creation spells over herself to feel alert and capable again. Subtly, subtly, so as not to alert the merchant. She didn’t need him knowing what she was, Warden or not. She so badly wanted to sleep; the back of the cart was so tempting, there among the sacks of goods. But she didn’t dare sleep, in this stranger’s cart.

The whole road to Highever he prattled cheerfully about his journeys, requiring only the most token of responses from Yvanne. This was both a blessing and a curse. A blessing, that she didn’t have to do much talking; a curse, that it left her mind free to wander.

That’s just it, isn’t it? You don’t understand, and you never will. You never will. You never will. You never—

“But I’m boring you, aren’t I?” the merchant said jovially.

“No!” she said. “No, I...I’m just tired. How much further to Highever?”

“We’ve just passed the village of Hornbill, so I wager not much longer than an hour,” said the merchant. “Plenty of time, in fact, for you to explain how you managed to escape your Circle.”

Yvanne froze.

“Oh, come now,” said the merchant. “Surely you don’t think me quite so dull as all that. You are a mage, are you not? Don’t try to deny it.”

“What makes you think I’m a mage?”

“I’ve been here and again, I can tell a woman on the run when I see one.”

“That doesn’t mean mage. You don’t know what I’m running from.”

He chuckled. “True, true. Only you stink of lyrium. I wasn’t sure until you came closer, but at this range? No question of what you are, my dear. Come now, tell me where you’ve escaped from? Wycome? Kinloch? Surely not Kirkwall.”

“I didn’t escape,” she said. “I’m a free mage. A Grey Warden.”

The merchant snorted. “I’m sure. I suppose you were there atop Fort Drakon when the Hero of Ferelden slew the Archdemon, too?”

“I have papers—”

The merchant chuckled. “Papers, hah! Good one. As though I’ve never forged a document in my day. You must think me very stupid—but I assure you, I’m merely old. Now how about telling me the truth?”

Yvanne said nothing. What could she say? She wasn’t in uniform. Right now she wasn’t Warden-Commander Yvanne Amell, local hero to thousands, an imposing Grey Warden who deserved respect. She was underdressed and unkempt and covered in mud. Even she wouldn’t have believed herself.

“Very well,” the merchant harrumphed. “Keep your secrets. Don’t worry, I don’t intend to turn you over to the Templars.”

“You aren’t?”

He smiled at her. “Of course, my silence isn’t free. You can start by turning over the rest of your pretty baubles.”

At first she didn’t know how to respond. “You’re extorting me for jewelry?” she managed, then scoffed. “This stuff’s worthless, you realize.”

The merchant shrugged. “I’d wager they’re all as valuable or more than the one you gave me, as you were so willing to part from it. Come on, now, I gave you a valuable tip about the lyrium smell. You’ll want to find new clothes in Highever, maybe cut your hair. That’ll help hide it.”

Yvanne’s mind raced.  The jewelry she’d been wearing when she’d fled, most of it enchanted with runes to make her spirit magic stronger—a lucky thing that she’d fallen asleep still wearing it—was far from worthless. In fact it was probably her only source of income for the foreseeable future. And she had no guarantee that this wretched man with his piggy eyes and curdled smile wouldn’t simply rob her and call the Templars anyway.

She had the legal grounds to challenge them, but since when did Templars mind the law?

“Thinking of killing me with magic, my dear?” the merchant said as her silence stretched on. “I wouldn’t recommend that. My route is well known to many, and I would be missed. Any fool would be able to tell I’d been killed by unnatural means, and that means Templars investigating, and I’m sure you’d prefer to avoid that.”

At that point the cart hit something in the road; something big enough to break the wheel and send the whole thing pitching to the side. The mules brayed and the merchant, swearing, brought them to a halt. He sighed and muttered something about always some damn thing and nobody maintaining the roads properly these days.

He got out of the driver’s seat and went around to look at the damage. If he had looked carefully, he might have noticed the ridge of earth that had splintered the wheel, with its sharp ninety-degree edges, was clearly unnatural. If he had not been so self-satisfied with his extortion scheme, he might have noticed Yvanne casting the spell that had put it there. And he might have noticed the glyph of paralysis she had placed by the wheel while he had wasted precious moments walking around the side of the cart.

As it was, he did none of those things, and found himself frozen in a half-bent position for the next minute at least.

Yvanne let out a breath.

“That’s not true, you know, about it being obvious you’d been killed by unnatural means,” she said. “I could slit your throat right now, and everybody would assume it was bandits.”

The merchant said nothing. Predictably.

“That was a very stupid thing to do for some jewelry,” she said.

She could have just slit his throat. No one would ever be the wiser, and she’d never have to worry about him again. She could even take his cart, and trade his goods, sell his mules; live on the income for months. If she let him go, she’d always be looking over her shoulder. Maybe get into altercations, with Templars, with others. Maybe have to kill even more people. More probably, get killed herself.

She remembered what it had felt like, to threaten Rolan, to really consider killing a helpless man, and—no, she would not do that.

The paralysis glyph was wearing off. She replaced it with a force cage just in time. The merchant regained the use of his limbs and fell to his knees, beating at the inside of the force cage with both fists. Whatever vile things he was shouting, Yvanne couldn’t hear them.

“Thanks for the tip about the lyrium smell,” she said. “And the food. I wouldn't have been able to cast anything without that. So thank you for that, and the ride, as well.” He couldn’t hear any of it, but she felt the need to say it.

Yvanne reached into the Fade and drew from it a spirit of Forgetting. It was a small thing, not much more than a wisp, just barely beginning to form an identity as Forgetting rather than an amorphous blob of Fade-stuff. It fluttered around her, curious, eager to take what memories it could. She gently directed it away from herself, towards the merchant.

She saw the panic in his eyes as he realized what was happening; she supposed he thought she was putting a demon in him, or something heinous like that. The spirit entered him, and he collapsed.

She hoped that the spirit would only take the past couple days from him, recent fresh memories—Yvanne’s face and existence at the least—and not much more. A few weeks at the most. Some larger spirits of this nature could erase a person’s whole life without meaning to. Victims would forget their lives, their names, every skill they’d learned since leaving diapers, ended up as drooling infants blank as the day they were born. It was horrifically sad to behold.

But this wouldn’t happen to the merchant, Yvanne assured herself. The spirit was small. A few weeks at the most.

The force cage faded, but the merchant didn’t move. He’d be unconscious for some time. Best that Yvanne be far away from here by then.

While he lay in the dirt she retrieved her amulet, then rifled through the contents of the cart. He carried mostly fine fabrics. She took the finest she could easily carry, and unharnessed one of the mules. It gazed at her with what she imagined was reproach. The merchant would only need one mule, with his lightened cart-load. He’d be fine. Confused, sure, but fine. It was more than what he deserved, for what he tried to do to her.

She ought to have killed him, she thought, leading the mule away. Vigil’s Keep had softened her, weakened her. It had made her forget what people were like.

She wouldn’t be forgetting again.

—

In Highever she sold the bolts of fabric and the mule first, just to be rid of them. It all came to far less than she’d hoped, and she came away thinking she ought to have bargained more, but it was enough for a change of clothes and a room at the first inn she saw. Not a nice room, but she got a hot meal and a bath in the bargain. There she scrubbed herself until she was sure the lyrium smell was gone. She’d grown so used to it that she’d forgotten how acrid-sharp it smelled to others, though she could only hope that the innkeeper and the merchants she’d traded with hadn’t recognized it. She thought about cutting her hair to be sure, but couldn’t bear it. Surely this one thing she could keep.

There she finally slept, in her shift and all her jewelry. Whatever dreams haunted her, she could not recall in the morning.

When she woke, evening had fallen again. The dark, the unfamiliar room, and the hard mattress disoriented her—this wasn’t her home. This wasn’t her bed. Why did her shoulder hurt? What had happened to her feet?Then she remembered.

You don’t understand, and you never will.

Maker, what had she done? Had the others noticed her absence yet? It had been nearly a full day, but she sometimes went many days without seeing those she counted friends. It might be a week or more until they all knew she’d fled. What would Loriel tell them? Would she tell them anything at all? Was she even thinking about her at all anymore?

She half-snarled and stumbled off the sagging mattress—and immediately slammed her foot into a bedside table so hard it splintered her big toenail.

She swore, bending to heal it—and hesitated. What if somebody saw? What if calling on magic at all made it easier for someone to spot her for what she was?

But she had Loriel’s parchment...didn’t she?

She rifled through her few possessions; the irrevocably ruined slippers, the torn and muddy house robe, the one bolt of cloth she wasn’t able to sell, a leather belt hung with pouches (mostly missing, now) of herbs, the plain linen dress she’d bought, though who knew if it would even fit her...

No parchment.

It was hardly surprising. She’d haphazardly jammed the document into her belt, and since then had fallen off a horse, twice. Who knew how long ago she’d lost it?

A heaviness settled in her chest, a weight like being deep underground. Now she didn’t have even the flimsiest of legal protections. And worse, she didn’t have Loriel’s handwriting, the only physical trace she had of her.

She hadn’t even read the full text before fleeing.

Loriel had done this to her. Had turned her out with nothing but a sheaf of parchment to her name. Had somehow foolishly believed that Loriel’s written word would protect her. The sheer arrogance of it all! To the void with her, to the void with her stupid bloody parchment. If Yvanne had still had it she would have burned it to a crisp. Her fists trembled, her eyes burned with fury, but she pushed herself up. To the void with her!

Yes, she was alone, she had almost nothing, and if the Templars found her, they would surely drag her back to Kinloch, and who knew what they’d do with her there. But she was damn well still alive, and she was going to live. And if Loriel didn’t want to do it with her, that was her fucking problem.

And, before the cloying darkness could settle in her chest again, Yvanne went downstairs to get a drink.