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cosmicallyavg · 2 years ago

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ramble about Listen please!!! i'm bored and I love reading rambling analyses of episodes

oh god please strap in because i’m gonna talk a whole lot of nonsense to you

listen is literally one of my favorite doctor who episodes ever. obviously the super fun plot-driven and action packed episodes like turn left, journeys end, the end of time, heaven sent/hell bent, and spyfall are high on my list of favorites, but listen has a special place in my heart that i cant really describe coherently but ill do my best.

also gonna offer my analysis of the episode for those who maybe just don't Get the episode or see it the way i do. i know it's an often hated episode so i’m hoping maybe i can change some minds here 👁

okay so the overarching theme of the episode for me is that everyone is scared of something in their lives - be it something big that takes over your whole life or small everyday fears - but regardless of the size or importance of those fears, they are always a product of our own creation. it’s also kind of a metaphor for anxiety i think? and other similar types of disorders? that we’re scared of stuff that isn't even real sometimes, it’s just something that our mind has crafted for us

let me explain: the doctor goes on about being afraid of the "monster under the bed" that he often dreams about. in the episode, we find out that the monster under the bed that he is referring to was actually clara visiting him as a child and grabbing his foot when he stepped out of bed. like if the doctor didn't become what they became and met the people they met.. the whole interaction would not have happened at all!! its paradoxical!! and we love that!!! the whole thing the doctor is afraid of is a product of itself

clara has her own fears to work through in the episode as well, her date with danny is going terribly. its definitely not comparable in terms of scale when you put it next to the doctor’s fear here, but that’s exactly the point! big vs small fears but all are fears nonetheless

which is where the “fear is a constant companion” line fits.. that people are always afraid of something even if it’s something miniscule to someone else. i just love it because also a big theme of the episode is “fear is a superpower” right? that we all have fears, but instead of cowering in a corner and letting it consume us, we should instead use the fear to do great things!! fear can make you fast, jump higher, fear can make you kind whatever the quote is from the episode lmao you get the idea

fear making you kind hits my heart in the right spot okay because that’s literally the doctor’s whole motivation for what they do! they help people! they save planets!! they use their fear to do good things!!! (thinking about the parallel between the doctor and the master here.. “you want me to be scared because you're scared of everything” or w/e that quote is. but i wont detract this post from it’s original purpose by getting all thoschei on you)

so i think by the end of it, the doctor realizes that him being afraid is a product of his own imagination. he went to the end of the dang universe to find the source, but still managed to be afraid even when there was absolutely nothing outside of the door. (which tbh.. the source of the actual tangible thing he feared was with him the whole time! because it was clara!!)

and clara worked through her fear of ruining the date with danny, she goes back to apologize to him and he does the same, they make up, they make out, everything is happy

i think also partially the reason she Does go back to danny to make things right is because of meeting orson? that there’s hints that he is a descendent of clara and/or danny.. so she has seen that possible future and either genuinely wants it to happen or assumes that it has to?

which brings me to another point about the episode.. i see a lot of people hating on it Because of the orson thing.. that they hinted at danny and clara staying together and having children, etc, etc but then killed danny like 6 episodes later?? i get it i guess.. but for me that really doesn't matter lmao?? \

how many times have we seen a potential future for the earth/the human race? that was either good or bad?? or just in general where someone made a choice to rewrite time or saw a potential future?? the long game? and bad wolf/the parting of the ways? new earth??? gridlock? utopia? last of the time lords/the sound of drums was literally a whole year that never happened?? the doctor’s daughter? the waters of mars? the hungry earth/cold blood?? the angels take manhattan?? journey to the centre of the tardis? heaven sent/hell bent? smile? oxygen? extremis/the pyramid at the end of the world/the lie of the land?? orphan 55??

these all can’t coexist like none of them are certain.. time can be rewritten it’s literally such a big theme of the show!! like orson was just a potential future, he wasn’t guaranteed. plus.. what are the chances that he isn’t related to either of them and the details just match up that well? coincidences happen! or maybe he’s from a parallel universe!! anything can happen.

idk i just see that as the biggest critique of the episode but for me it really isn’t a dealbreaker

enough of the small rant i want to conclude my analysis of the episode

i love quirky and different episodes like listen where the alien/threat/whatever is something more introspective? that it makes you think a bit before it clicks?

also i just love the whole idea of clara going back in time to comfort baby doctor because esp now with what we know about the timeless child i think they deserve it 🥺 (i’ve made some posts about wanting the doctor to visit themself as the timeless child and do something similar.. not interfere.. just give some encouragement because they need it. but again.. i wont derail the original purpose of this post)

i also love how she tells the doctor to never look back at where they had been.. i like to think that he didn't ever look but something in him Knows.. i love the way he smiles at the end when he underlines “LISTEN” on his chalkboard. like the memory of that night came back to him but it was a little different than he remembered, there was a familiar voice in it this time. but it might just be the effects of time on an old memory like that, filling in the blanks with what’s familiar now.

and i just love the ending so much, after the tension of waiting for the reveal of who the child was that clara was hiding under the bed, we get to see her speak to the child softly, telling him about dreams and fears, and how it will shape him in the future. and the way the music builds with the voiceover and clara is hugging the doctor at the console and she’s going back to danny and they kiss and it’s all coming together into a crescendo with the quote “fear makes companions of us all”

i just love the callback to an unearthly child.. it just always warms my heart when there’s a reference to classic who because this silly show has been around for so long and it has done so much for me and i just have a lot of emotions okay

so yeah.. hopefully literally any of this makes sense i’m just rambling. hopefully this is everything you hoped for when you sent this ask lmao

#fskfhskhfl #i have feelings #doctor who #ep listen #dw meta #asks #show-stoppin-enby

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mrs-harkness · 4 years ago

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Ocean Eyes (Part 1)

Pairing: Tammy x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2.6K

Taglist: @peggycarter-steverogers @imgayandmymomdoesntknow

A/n: Hey guys. Sorry for the wait. Life has been so busy as I just became a certified therapist and just life stuff in general. This is just going to be a mini fic for fun while I work on writing my next big one- which will be for Cordelia! Literally nothing like Run to Me, so I hope you don’t find it disappointing. Just a little filler while I work out the plot for my next story!

You pulled out your phone, checking the time. 1:53 PM. Your interview was at 2 o'clock and if you didn't figure out where you were quickly, you were going to be late. You walked faster, panic dialing your best friend who had gotten you the interview.

"Hello?" the sweet voice chimed on the other end.

"Sarah! Help! I'm lost," you pleaded, looking at the address on the piece of paper in your hand and trying to match it to the towering houses around you.

"How did you get lost? I gave you the exact address. Did the driver put it in wrong?"

"No. I made the Uber drop me off at the entrance to the neighborhood because his car looked super sketch and I didn't want the mom to see me step out of a car that looks like it was used in a 70's porn film. I started walking and I got lost."

You heard Sarah shuffling around in the background, and what sounded like the tapping of keys.

"Okay, give me the address for the closest house," she said. Your best friend was a life saver.

"Uhhh... 768 Elm Street," you told her, trying not to look suspicious in this wealthy neighborhood.

"Hmmm. Okay you're literally two streets over. If you go to the end of this street, take a right and walk less than two blocks. You'll make it to maple from there. You somehow managed to be right behind her house. It will take you about ten minutes."

Shit.

"No! There has got to be a quicker way! I am going to be late!" You whined, stomping your feet on the sidewalk in frustration.

"Yeah, Tammy is not going to like that. She is very patient but she's got three kids so she really only has enough patience for them. Well wait, hang on a second."

"What? Did you find a quicker route?"

"Sorta. You should have just stayed in the Uber."

"Sarah I did not want to pull up like Will Smith from the Fresh Prince of Belaire, now spit it out already!"

"Well that house you are standing in front of? Technically if you could find a way into their backyard and through the trees... you could get to Tammy's house in half the time."

You looked at the house in front of you. It looked more like a post office than a home. Large marble columns, real gas lamps framing a shiny oak door, and a second floor balcony that seemed larger than Sarah's whole apartment. This is not the type of property you just meandered around on, but this job was also not the type of opportunity you just let slip away by being two minutes late.

You walked a little to the side of the house, and there you found your favorite thing of the whole house: A gate to the backyard.

"I'm gonna do it," you say to Sarah, who had been quiet this entire time.

There was more silence, before you heard your best friend draw in a breath.

"Don't get arrested please. Call me when you're done, or in lock up. Either way, be safe."

Sarah had always been someone who just supported and loved you no matter what. Whether it was moving on a whim to another city and crashing on her couch indefinitely or trespassing through a rich family's yard to get the job that would help you get started on your dreams. She was that type of friend and you loved her for it.

You didn't even say goodbye as you hung up and checked the time again. 1:55 PM mocked you on the screen. You shoved the phone in your pocket before quickly looking around. No one was out and about thankfully probably due to the heat picking up, so you walked briskly over to the gate.

You said a prayer and begged the universe to be kind to you under your breath as you forced yourself to find the courage and flung open the lock to the gate, letting it swing open. You looked around the yard really quickly to find it empty as well. Maybe this wouldn't be hard at all.

You closed the gate behind you and you quickly jogged into the yard. There was a picnic table close to the other side of the fence and you would be able to hop right over! You breathed a sigh of relief because everything was going to plan, until the dog.

A ear piecing yap began sounding through the yard like an obnoxious security alarm. You turned and saw that the back of the home was basically one big window and there inside was the ugliest looking purse dog you had ever seen, notifying every living creature with working ears within a mile of your presence.

You watched horrified as the owner of said ugly dog appeared in the view of the window like some horror movie on a tv screen. An older woman, dressed as if she had been in the middle of a workout, was also now yapping at you angrily and making her way to her giant window wall.

Your feet started moving before you realized what was happening and you bolted to the back of the yard and onto the picnic table, jumping and throwing one of your legs over the fence. The little old woman made it to a sliding glass door, releasing her dog and profanities towards you.

The dog tore across the lawn, but thankfully was no actual threat. You looked at the woman as you threw your other leg over the fence.

"I'm not a criminal! I'm sorry! I just got lost on the way to a job interview. You have a nice home!" you yelled, trying to prove to this stranger you were not bad, just had poor execution of your ideas. You dropped over the other side of the fence and into the wooded area behind the home, running as fast as your feet could carry you from the angry woman and her angrier dog.

It only took you about a minute of running full force to make it to another fence, a fence you were praying was Tammy's. You ran around the length of it, following it to the front of the house. You shakily pulled out the paper from your pocket and checked the address. You had made it. This was the house. You laughed, more relieved than anything, and jogged to the front door.

You knocked and weren't even able to take a full breath before the door opened.

There before you stood the most beautiful woman you had ever laid your eyes on. Her hair was the color of sand on the beaches of heaven its self and her eyes looked like brownies fresh from the over, and you had the strange thought of wanting to burn your mouth on them.

Y/n, that's weird. Stop it.

You stared at her, trying not to look to heavily at her gorgeous smile at the fear she may think you were looking at her lips. Even though you kind of were. You forced yourself to smile back.

"You must be Y/n," she said, looking at her watch, "and you are right on time. Let it be known I find that super attractive."

You chuckle nervously, unable to process a coherent thought. You really just hoped she couldn't tell you had just ran through the woods to stand stupid on her doorstep. Thankfully it didn't seem like she did and stepped aside, letting you in.

The home was gorgeous and lavish, but also homey and seemed lived in. You could hear the distant laughter of children somewhere in the house and portraits of what you could only assume were those children hung on the walls. You did notice though that there was a lack of family portraits probably due to the husband no longer being in the picture.

Sarah had filled you in a little bit about the family situation. She had worked with them over the summer and was working for them when they filed for divorce. Supposedly neither of them seemed upset by it, but he had still decided to move into another town. Tammy supposedly worked a very busy job and with three rambunctious kids, help was needed. Sarah had helped them occasionally, but Tammy needed something more permanent and hopefully that's where you would come in.

You followed Tammy into a big open kitchen and sat down with her at the kitchen table.

"Can I offer you some tea or water?" she said sweetly.

Even though you were parched from the mini marathon you had just ran, you politely declined. You pulled your resume out of your bag and put it on the table. Tammy reached over and took it, looking at it before smiling back up at you.

"I know Sarah said you had just moved here, so what brought you to town?" Tammy asked.

You hoped the look of confusion was not obvious on your face because you were expecting only questions about the job. You were unsure how useful you would be talking about yourself right now.

"Uh, well I came to town for a fresh start, and with Sarah here, it just seemed like the best place to restart."

"Running from something?" Tammy asked, putting down the resume and taking a sip of something in a mug that had been sitting on the table.

"N-no ma'am. Nothing illegal. I am not a criminal. I told the old lady the same thing," you stuttered.

Tammy raised her eyebrow at the last part, but you kept going to breeze over it hopefully.

"I just- I got my heartbroken and got kicked out of the apartment we shared. I didn't feel like I was making anything of my life where I was and I have such big dreams, but all I found there was pain and complacency, so I came here in hope to change that."

You voice sounded small and you ringed your hands in your lap, nervous that you may have said too much. Tammy's face softened even more somehow though and she smiled at you over the edge of her mug. She stared at you for a moment, her eyes seeming to sparkle. She nodded and looked down at your resume again.

"Well, you certainly have quite an impressive track record here. You seem like a kid expert. And because I already did a background check on you, I feel comfortable saying, if you would like the job its yours."

You sat there at the table, now not trying to hide the stunned look on your face. You had a harder time getting over the fence than getting employed by this woman.

"That's it? You don't need to ask me anything else? You're giving me the job?" you ask, stumbling over your words.

Tammy laughs and it feels like butterflies flutter in your belly. You like to make her laugh, but you aren't sure if she think's you're funny or stupid.

"With my life and my job, Y/n, the thing that is most important to me is being able to trust you. With my kids, my day to day life, and if I need your help with something. Trust and honesty go a long way with me, and you proved that with one question," she said, coming over to you with a glass of water.

You took it with a smile, forcing yourself to take a slow slip.

"Well, you can definitely trust me. And I'd be honored to by your nanny," you say, excitement and nervousness flowering inside your chest.

Tammy smiles sweetly at you.

"Consider yourself part of the family Y/n. Now you do know this is a live in position right? Sarah told you that?"

You nodded, that having been one of the main reasons you wanted the job. As much as you loved Sarah, you did not love sleeping on her couch. Being a live in nanny presented its own set of challenges, but it wouldn't be forever.

"Good. Can you move in today?"

You choked on your water, coughing and spitting it all over your shirt. Tammy laughed at you, and your cheeks burned red. Now you were embarrassed and Tammy sensed that.

"I'm sorry Y/n, I didn't mean to shock you. I just really need your help around here as soon as possible. And it would be better if you just came on in and got to know me and the kids since you're going to be a big part of our lives."

She handed you a paper towel, looking down at you with a comforting expression. Your cheeks burned red again, but not from embarrassment. You looked away and cleared your throat, unsure why you were so flustered.

"Sure. Yeah, no problem. I just need to run home and grab my clothes and things, but I don't have any furniture so-"

"Oh don't worry. You'll have the whole attic. Its renovated and fully furnished and you'll have your own bathroom. You don't need to worry about buying anything."

That was a relief. It would have taken you a while to afford those things.

You got up and walked with Tammy to the front door, her opening it for you.

"Thank you Ms. Tammy for hiring me, you will not regret it. I will take good care of your kids and make your life as easy as I possibly can," you say, brushing a piece of hair behind your ear, attempting to look confident and wanting to ensure Tammy she had made the right choice.

She chuckled again, putting a little hole in that confidence, but it was quickly repaired when she wrapped her arms around you. It shocked you and you stood there, frozen for a second before hugging her back.

"I know you will. You're going to be a wonderful addition to our lives, all of our lives," she said. Her voice had a hint of something in it, making it seem like silk, but then you felt her pulling on your hair a bit and you felt like your legs may fall out from under you. Who was this woman?

Before you could assume anything further though, she pulled back and revealed she had taken a small branch with green leaves from your hair. You laughed nervously. Tammy cocked an eyebrow at you and smiled cheekily, holding it up.

"That is a funny story... I can explain that. I promise I bathe."

It was Tammy who laughed this time thankfully. She nodded and played with the branch in between her long, manicured fingers.

"That's alright. You can tell me about it tonight over drinks once you are home. I'd like to get to know you better while we get you settled."

Something about the way she said it made your breath catch in your throat. She smiled at you and you two said your goodbyes. You would text her when you were on the way back home. How strange that felt.

You sat in a much cleaner Uber on the way back to Sarah's, your head pressed against the glass. You couldn't stop thinking about Tammy and it seemed like you also couldn't wipe the smile from your face either. It seemed almost like a dream.

Just then, your phone buzzed and you were pulled from the thoughts of the woman to see that her name was on your screen. You quickly held the phone up to unlock it, suddenly overcome with the need of answering her at a moments notice. Thankfully it was not a message of her changing her mind.

Btw, just call me Tammy. Ms. Tammy is a little formal ;)

You smiled and bit your lip, quickly responding.

Okay, Tammy :)

#oceans 8 #tammy #tammy oceans 8 #sarah paulson x reader #sarah paulson #sarah paulson fanfic #sarah paulson fic #mini fic

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goblinkingdomsblog · 3 years ago

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Hello I hope you are doing well !! I was wondering if it okay to request the mafia universe where they meet the agent y/n have a moment but then the agent smile and go away in like we will meet again kinda way I’m sorry if it’s too much you don’t have to do it I appreciate your writing and love it thank you for your hard work 💕

They get hurt while running away from the police, but agent y/n helps them - part 1

Members: hyung line.

Genre: mafia!AU, reaction.

Premise: during a police chase, one of the mobsters ends up getting injured. Suddenly, you appear when he least expected it, willing to help him. You say you will see each other again in the future. With complete certainty: after all, you will guarantee it yourself.

TW: (V) = Violence.

Mafia Series Masterlist

Mafia Series Plot

Hii!! I hope you enjoy this post, and that it meets well your request!

I'm really happy to know that you like the things that I write! Thank youu!!! 💜❤😁

+ Sorry for the delay, I wanted to make a long version of this reaction. The part 2 is already posted!

"We'll see each other again, don't worry."

Namjoon:

The damn right leg. It was always that damn leg.

Namjoon gasped, lowering himself against the wall of the dark alley. The smell there was not at all pleasant, and the humidity certainly wouldn't leave his expensive suit unpunished, but he was too busy to care about that at the moment.

Everything happened in a flash: one hour, he was sitting comfortably on a soft leather sofa, talking to the leaders of the other two most important gangs in Seoul (maintaining good relations between partner companies was essential); on the other, he was running down the wet sidewalk, after escaping from the building through a side door. The damned police had somehow discovered the secret meeting, probably through a traitor, and had invaded the place, trying to kill three birds with one stone.

Even his security guards had stayed behind, exchanging shots with the police to give him enough time to escape. He hated having to escape, looking like a coward, but he knew it was necessary.

Another thing he hated: he couldn't run fast without dropping at least one of his weapons, or himself. It was in a fall on the wet street that he had injured his leg, the same one that had broken twice before, and that now was hurting again thanks to his shitty motor coordination. He knew he was being chased, so he got up and forced himself to run for several more blocks, until the pain became too unbearable to walk. It was at that moment that he hid in the alley, where he was until now.

Suddenly, the sound of heavy footsteps echoed in the wet darkness. Without a gun, he could do nothing but watch, hoping his bad luck wasn’t that glaring that day.

When you turned into the alley with your weapon in your fists, using its wall for protection, you saw him immediately.

The mafia boss, sitting on the floor, with an empty expression.

Frowning, you checked if that was a trap and if there was someone around, but he seemed completely alone. Raising your voice, you announced your presence, and the first thing he saw was your well-equipped uniform.

- Hands up. Put them behind your head. - you said, with controlled calm.

Namjoon sighed, obeying slowly.

- I'm unarmed. You don't need to be alarmed.

- Get up and come over here. - you ordered, ignoring his words.

The mobster started to get up, but then he slid back down the wall. He tried a couple more times, until he gave up and lay motionless on the floor.

- Hurry up.

- I am unable. I think I broke my leg again. - he murmured, almost as if admitting it was a shame.

Suspicious, you didn't move forward initially. You checked the alley again, but no one was in sight. So, you decided to use a different strategy: you approached with the gun pointed at his head, after all, none of the henchmen would dare threaten the life of their leader (or at least that was what you hoped to be true).

- If you try anything "funny", I swear I'll kill you, okay? - you hissed, bending down in front of him.

The man's legs were stretched out in front of him, and the right was in an ugly position, proving that he was telling the truth. The bone must have torn the flesh, because a bloody wheel was beginning to form in his pants. It would be disgusting to anyone who was not used to brutality.

- How did you get hurt like that?

- Let's say that this specific bone is not the strongest. It is already the third incident that occurs with the poor thing. - he tried to laugh, perhaps to feel better about himself, but the pain prevented him.

You then took a deep breath. You couldn't leave the man bleeding there, even if he wasn't the best of people. It went against your values.

By slowly lowering the weapon (but keeping it within immediate reach), you began to roll up your uniform sleeves. The basic first aid classes you took when you joined the police would have to do.

- What will you do? - he asked, lost in hesitation and fear, as he noticed your approach.

- I will help you not to bleed a river. But it will really hurt, and it will be a really temporary solution. - you answered, seriously.

Without saying anything more, the man just fell silent, a thoughtful expression appearing on his face.

You put your hands firmly on his leg and, using the techniques you had learned, started to push. The pain was absurd, but he preferred to bite his lip until it bled rather than scream. Of course, being a fugitive from the police should be part of the motivation for not making too much noise.

The cracking of bones when they went back to place was hollow and dark, but at least the meat stopped being kept open. Taking a serious look at him, you noticed that the man was pale with pain, looking like he was about to pass out.

- Breathe in. The worst is over. - you replied, rummaging through your belt until you found the bandages you always carried along, in case of personal emergencies.

Carefully but firmly, you started to bandage his leg, just to stop the bleeding and keep the leg in place for as long as possible.

- Don't move too much, or you could make your situation even worse.

The man remained silent for a few minutes, just watching your serious expression and your nimble hands as you bandaged his leg. He wasn't sure about how to react, after all, that kind of situation was not quite what a mobster would expect from a police agent.

- Uh... why are you helping me?

You lifted your head, facing him directly.

- One of the most important parts of doing justice involves not letting anyone bleed to death. And even if your wound is not that deadly, I believe that waiting for a long time in a wet alley is not the most ideal healing scenario. - letting go and wiping your hands on the leftover gauze, you took your gun out of your belt and stood up - I'll give you the advantage of not immediately telling them where you are. But hope your henchmen find you fast.

He watched you walk away, going back cautiously to the exit of the alley.

- But... I... - unable to formulate a coherent sentence and not wanting to look like an idiot, Namjoon just gave up asking questions - I suppose that's what it means to be on the good side. Thank you anyway.

Surprisingly, you turned around one last time. The smile that shone on your face exposing all your teeth and lifting the corners of your mouth, giving you an air of extreme cleverness, took away the little breath that was left to Namjoon.

- Oh, but you don't need thank me now, because we will meet again. And next time, I'm not going to be that good. - clicking your tongue, you took a step towards the darkness - You better be well prepared.

So, you're gone, leaving him alone in the alley until the moment he would be found by the other gang members (which took a little longer than it should have).

Seokjin:

Shit!

That whole day was being terrible. First, Jin had started by clashing with members of a rival gang. Then the police arrived, shooting anyone they saw ahead. It was in the middle of so many fights that he ended up being shot in the palm of his hand, and his dominant hand!

Pressing his hand against his now-stained shirt chest, he continued walking through the seemingly empty industrial quarter, unsure of how to hold his revolver straight.

Everything should have been a simple negotiation, but things got off track too quickly.

His palm had already bled so badly that the entire front of his shirt was red. In addition, he could no longer move his fingers, which was a really bad signal. Containing a sob, he let a few tears roll down his face.

He was concerned with his own hand, but his biggest concern was if it would lose its usefulness forever. How would he be a hacker after that, without being able to type?

It was at that moment that you found him wandering alone and desperate. You had been looking for the fugitives in the more distant streets, to make sure they didn't get far. However, when you found the boy crying, a part of the adrenaline that dominated your mind dissipated. He barely held a gun, after all.

With patience, you announced your presence. When he saw you, he threw his head back in mourning, as if he were indignant at the heavens.

- I can't handle it right now! - he whimpered.

Rolling your eyes, you approached, your gun in hand.

- Don't worry, I won't shoot if you don't do anything stupid.

Eyes widening, he pulled his hand away from the body, in a strangled cry.

- How would I do it if there's a hole in my hand?!

Even a few feet away, the fact that it was possible to see through his hand was disturbing. The bullet had gone in and out, leaving a hole with color of blood, bones and nerves showing. Yes, the boy's despair was justified. You just kept calm because you've seen a lot of complicated situations like that before.

- You have to stop the bleeding!

- How am I going to do this with one hand?! - the silent tears continued to run down his face.

Sighing, you finally approached, scaring him by holding his hand.

- What is this?!

- A basic aid, considering that the nearest hospital is two kilometers from here. - you replied simply, taking improvised bandages from inside the jacket of your uniform.

There was not much to do about that hand other than to stop the bleeding. Avoiding looking at his blood-soaked shirt (which was not a pleasant sight at all), you began to wrap the wound with the fabric, covering the hole and tightening the bandage tightly.

He let out a sob of pain, but he didn't back down, knowing he needed to put up with it.

- Take good care of this wound.

He wiped his wet face with his healthy hand, sniffling.

- I don't even know if I'll have a hand after this! - the reaction would be comical if it weren't tragic. The panic in his voice was real.

So, you closed your expression, getting completely serious.

- You will take care of your hand and you will stop being pessimistic. It'll be there the next time we meet. - so, you gave a smile of certainty, small but absolute.

Then, moving away, you raised your weapon again, passing by him.

It took a few seconds for Seokjin to understand what you had said. The pain left him with slow thinking.

- Hey, next time?! - he exclaimed, turning in your direction.

Unfortunately, you were too far away to be stopped. He watched you leave for a much longer time than the expected.

Yoongi:

He was no longer able to walk, so he didn't force himself anymore. It didn't matter that he was inside the same building that the police were still in: he just couldn't get away anymore.

Limping painfully for a few more steps, he sat down in the narrow hall, resting his back against one of the walls. He and his two customers had been caught during the delivery of a shipment of heroin, and one of the damned customers had stabbed him to have time to escape. Literally.

With a small knife stuck in his thigh, Yoongi was actually slower than the others, easier to be captured. He was just lucky to be in the company of his most trusted friends, who came into conflict with the police just so he could run. He was worried about them now, of course, and he couldn't even repay their sacrifice and really escape. The pain was so much, and the blood on his clothes was so much, that his veins seemed to be filled with acid, which caused a burning sensation in his entire body.

Closing his mouth to try to hold his breath and feeling the sweat on his forehead, he leaned his head against the wall, looking at the ceiling for a few moments. The knife was still stuck in his leg and needed to be pulled out. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and counted to three. Then, lifting his trembling hands, he put them on the handle of the knife. That gesture alone was enough to make more cold sweat run down the back of his neck.

Then, as he prepared to pull the knife out, you appeared at the end of the hall. Wide-eyed, you observed the injured man and what he intended to do.

- Wait! Don't pull it! - you exclaimed, startling him.

I mean, Yoongi got scared, but the only thing he did was to turn his head slowly towards you, without really expressing fear.

You turned the other way, knowing that your colleagues were close. Specifically, a colleague who hated mobsters, and who would certainly have no mercy when shooting a man who was already injured. There was even a trail of drops of blood on the carpet, which went as far as the dealer was left.

- Why not? Sometime it will have to go. - he said, in a weak voice, with the tone of someone who no longer cared.

You slowly lowered your weapon when you realized that he was not carrying any gun. Then you looked at him again, snorting when you realized that you would need to act quickly.

Too many people had been hurt that day. You needed to fix the situation. Then, running up to him, you bent down in front of the man.

- You were stabbed in your thigh, that is full of important blood vessels. In addition, you are already bleeding too much. - you said, scolding him with some anger - If you pull the knife, it can make the situation worse and cause a much worse bleeding. Even though it hurts, the knife seems to be stopping the wound.

Too impressed by how straightforward you were, he just remained silent, nodding his head to signal that he would obey. In the distance, you heard your angered colleague's voice. Then you faced the mobster again, running your hands over his shoulders.

- I'm going to get you out of here and put you in a place where you're not in the immediate sight of a gun. But I can't do anything else. You will need hospital care.

Yoongi opened his eyes wide when you started to help him up, shocked by the situation as a whole.

- Why are you doing this? - he asked, his voice low and strangled with pain.

With effort, you managed to get him upright, but you were practically carrying his full weight.

- Because I think people should go through a fair trial, and not just get shot in the head like will happen if I leave you here. - striving to walk, you started down the corridor, towards the basement of the building - And make sure that your leg does not leave a trail of blood behind us, even if you have to tighten the fabric of your pants around the wound.

Again, he obeyed without protest, containing a cry of pain as he prevented the blood from dripping on the floor. He was shaking and sweaty, and the pain he was enduring must have been scary. Still, that was better than leaving him to die.

You followed as quickly as possible to the staircase, and each step was a sacrifice for Yoongi. The black mask you were wearing, part of the uniform, prevented him from seeing your face, but your eyebrows were frown at the smell of blood and the man in agony.

When you reached the basement, you hid the man behind a tall and heavy closet. The place was small, dusty and probably untouched for months. Still, you left him on the floor, sitting.

Stretching your aching back, you searched for the bad and cheap phone you used when you went to work, for emergencies. You turned it on and handed it over to the injured man, just before standing.

- Use this to call someone who can help you. It's the most I can do for you. - you said, as soon as he held the little electronic device.

Pale but with lively eyes, Yoongi took another deep breath to be able to speak through the pain.

- Thanks. - he said simply, closing his eyes when a flash of pain passed through his body. Then, he opened his eyes again - Isn't this phone tapped? It would be pretty easy to track me, then.

With a mysterious expression, you walked away. Even though you were wearing a mask, he could see the corners of your mouth going up to form a mysterious smile.

- You will have to find it out until the next time we meet. - you replied, taking your weapon from the belt just before leaving by the same staircase you had traveled before - Do not expect me to help you again.

Hoseok:

Hoseok was crying, something he hated to do. However, getting shot in the chest was not something that happened every day, and it was okay to cry in a situation like that.

With his hands pressed to the bleeding wound, he staggered down a deserted road in the hot dry night. The road was flanked by plantations, since it was located in the countryside, and the only noises there were that of the plants moving with the wind and that of the nocturnal animals.

He was afraid of those animals, after all, he smelled of blood. Still, nothing too dangerous should be there, as farmers would exterminate any creature. Even the "creature" himself, probably, if he appeared bleeding and wanted by the police in one of the houses far from the road.

He stumbled forward, needing to lean on one of the wooden fences. The pain in his chest was so strong that he had no idea where he was running to.

Suddenly, he felt the cold muzzle of a gun at the back of his head. As he bent over the fence, he stopped paying attention to the environment, and didn't notice when you approached silently.

- Hands up! - you hissed between teeth.

With a high-pitched cry, he remained in place.

- I'm using my hands to stop the bleeding from the shot your colleague gave me in the chest! - he exclaimed, his voice exuding real pain.

Swallowing hard, you wondered if it was true, and ordered him to turn around. When he did it, weak, the front of the shirt soaked in blood was proof enough.

The man's luck was that the shot had hit the right side of his chest and not the heart. The bullet was still lodged in his chest, but the bleeding was not aggressive enough to had hit an artery. That man was very, very lucky.

- Give me your gun. - you said, forcing the man to hand over his revolver. As soon as you made sure he was unarmed, you lowered your own weapon - Let me see.

By taking the man's hands away and looking more closely at the wound hole, you were sure that no very important veins had been hit. Then you started to take off the man's coat.

- Hey, what are you doing?! Isn't it enough that you invaded our place and killed 4 people?! - he exclaimed, irritated and scared.

Hearing those words was not pleasant, but they were true. So you didn't answer, just folding the jacket efficiently and wrapping it diagonally around his body, tying it tightly on his back.

- I'm helping you, you bastard.

Arching his eyebrows, he realized you were telling the truth.

- Why? - he asked, confused.

- Because nobody else is going to die today. I'll make sure of that. - you answered seriously - Now tighten the wound again. Prevent too much blood from being lost.

The man was already pale, but when he heard of blood, he became even more so. He swallowed hard, his face still wet with tears.

- Are you sure that I will not die?

You started to smile wryly, wanting to laugh at his crybaby face. However, as you watched his expression, you realized that his panic was real. You then changed your expression, smiling without showing your teeth but confidently.

- I am sure. We will meet in the future, because I will keep you alive. - you said, walking away - Now, run to the house after this plantation behind you and ask for help. I have to go back to the mission.

He wanted to say something else, but you were already walking away. The courage you gave him through your steady smile was enough.

He had the strength to run to the nearest house and ask for help.

Maknae line here.

The images used on this post are not mine, credits to the owners!

Kisses from the Goblin Kingdom! :)

#fanfiction #writing #bts #bts mafia au #bts mafia fic #kpop imagines #kpop mafia #imagines #books and libraries #goblin king #hyung line #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #bts x reader #agent reader

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comfyswitcherblanketfort · 4 years ago

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Snowed In p5

I have an hour before work so instead of doing the responsible thing and cranking out my labs, I’m posting smutty fic. in my defense, I have none.

Pairing: Geralt x fem!reader

Warnings: smut. hella smut, unprotected sex, bit bitey, hair pulling? I’m new to writing smut so if there’s any more plz message me I really wanna know and be able to tag my shit accordingly.

Summary: How else does one get to sleep if not by fucking your friend that is totally not more than a friend? or Geralt finally does something about the tension between them?

There’s a bit of plot in here somewhere I swear. Not really, I just have a feeling G is competitive af. We’ll be back to our regularly scheduled emotionally indulgent programming next part so if you’re not down with the smut I’ll add a little summary on the beginning of the next one.

Part 4 here!

__________

Day thirty brought a restlessness that couldn't be soothed. If you weren't moving you felt like you were going to disintegrate to dust from the pent up energy.

You tried trudging circles around the barn in the snow, sprinting up and down the stairs, making Geralt spar with you until your muscles gave up and you collapsed, but you couldn't shake the need to move. You even went so far as to ask Geralt to hold you while you tried to sleep. You used the "it works for babies maybe it could calm me down" excuse and he must have bought it because he wasted no time pulling you into his arms. Regardless of how comfortably you fit tucked into his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat, you only slept an hour or two.

Day thirty one was no different. Anxious, restless, and now pissy because of how tired you were. You paced most of the day, to Geralt's dismay. He finally ordered you to run the stairs because he couldn't "sit here and watch you walk a hole in the floor anymore". You'd rolled your eyes but you did it anyway, until you thought you might hurl. Then when the nausea passed you ran them ten times more for good measure. You even ate more than usual at dinner, hoping a full stomach would at least make you feel sluggish enough to stop moving.

Despite all this, you laid staring at the ceiling for hours, tapping your fingers on your ribs and wishing for even a wink of sleep.

Just when you were starting to feel lighter, ready to float off to blessed unconsciousness, you heard a deep moan and a giggle from the other side of the wall.

"Fuck me. I thought they were still fighting" You groaned, rolling over to face away from the wall and pulling your pillow over your ear.

Geralt grimaced, staring at the ceiling, "Made up an hour ago."

You snickered, "So you really hear all of it?"

He rolled his eyes, the movement just barely visible in the light of the dying fire, "Unfortunately, I can hear a room past them as well."

Another moan and the distinct sound of someone's ass getting slapped seemed to echo in the silence.

"I was so close to sleep" you sighed, silently wishing a curse on the neighbors.

Geralt frowned, you assumed because he heard something he'd rather not until he opened his mouth, "S'probly why they're so chipper."

"Hm?"

He glanced at you before elaborating, "All the… they're in a better mood because they actually sleep. After they… you know, fuck."

You snorted, praying he couldn't see the flush in your cheeks, "Is that how it works?" Your voice was dripping with sarcasm.

The neighbors were growing louder by the second, clearly so excited about the resolution of their fight that they didn't care if they woke the whole inn.

He shrugged, "Works for me."

His tone was too casual, too measured even for him. You narrowed your eyes in a desperate attempt to pull any more information out of the shadows on his face.

"To get to sleep you mean?" Your voice was nearly a whisper, tamped by what you thought he might be implying.

He hummed in agreement, finally turning to face you, his face completely unreadable, "Might calm you down."

If you'd wanted to play it cool your body betrayed you. Your heartbeat alone was a dead giveaway that his words got to you, and you didn't even want to know what he could tell with any other senses.

You blinked hard, trying to form a coherent sentence, "Ar- are you… uhm… offering?"

He propped himself up on an elbow and his entire demeanor changed, the usual mask of indifference replaced with a grin, "I am."

You heard a little voice in the back of your head yelling about how things could get messy but you shut it up, already feeling that coil tightening between your hips just from how he was looking at you.

You reached out to run a finger over his wrist, lightly tracing little figure eights over his skin, "I'd hate for you to regret it in the morning."

"I have a lot of regrets in life, very rarely do I regret sex."

He can tell. He's way too fucking confident not to know. Fuck it.

You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth and looked up at him through your lashes, "Couldn't hurt to try."

He leaned over you, almost kissing you before moving to your ear, his lips brushing against your skin as he whispered, "Is that a yes?"

Fuck.

"Yes. Hell yes."

You felt the vibrations of the rumblings in his chest as he practically growled before nipping at your jaw. You gasped and grabbed onto the hem of his shirt, now that the tension had broken and you'd touched you finally could move.

He stopped you though, placing a soft kiss over the skin that stung from his bite before sitting back and pulling you with him, "Clothes. Off."

You obeyed immediately, shimmying out of every last stitch and letting out a soft moan as you saw him drop his small clothes.

He smirked, "That excited?" He asked as he resumed his position above you.

"Something like that. Your ass is great." You answered, not bothering with this charade of shyness anymore. He laughed softly, placing kisses on your neck and running his hand up your body to your chest. You moaned when he squeezed your tit but you yelped when he kissed his way down to the other one and licked at your nipple. He chuckled and took the nub between his teeth, biting down and pulling back just enough to earn another moan before he pressed his lips over the area and sucked.

"Ah fuck Geralt." One of your hands gripped his hair, but you didn't pull, not like you wanted to.

He left a trail of kisses to your other breast, "Pull all you want." He paused to circle your now extremely sensitive nipple with his tongue, "I like it." Before you could respond he bit the very tip and you moaned again, this time testing the waters with a light tug at his hair.

He hummed in response and continued his trail down your body.

You hadn't pegged him for the type to go down on his woman first, but oh how wrong you were. The bastard knew exactly what he was doing and exactly how it drove you wild.

He left little bites at your hip crease and on your inner thigh, coming closer to where you wanted him most, only to switch to your other hip.

"You're a fucking tease." You whined, breathless and so achingly turned on.

Almost before you finished your sentence, one of his hands spread your folds and he licked from your opening up over your clit.You shivered and gasped, tugging at his hair again.

He moaned against you and your eyes rolled back in your head, "Mmmmmm Geralt more. Please."

He obliged immediately, flicking his tongue over your clit in a pattern that made your whole body tingle and thighs squeeze together. Without missing a beat he pushed your legs apart and laid his arm over your hip, bringing his hand to your opposite thigh to hold you in place.

Still working your clit with his tongue he slowly pushed two fingers into you, curling and pumping at an annoyingly laid back pace. You bucked your hips up, or tried, and he chuckled, pulling his fingers away completely.

"Fuck you." You gasped, "That's just rude."

He licked over your opening with a broad tongue and pulled back, "Kinda the point, isn't it?"

"Geralt." You mewled in protest, pulling his hair again and earning a grunt in return before his mouth was back on your cunt. He added a third finger when he started again, stretching you out and damn near making you writhe. He coaxed moan after moan, whine after desperate whine from your lips and just before you came, he stopped completely.

Sitting back and surveying his work he grinned, "Not yet. You have to earn it."

Melitele's Tits. That's so hot.

You lurched forward, pushing him on his back and straddling his thighs, "Earn it? Like this?" You reached between your legs and gathered your own slick before gripping the base of his cock and pumping just as infuriatingly slow as he had gone earlier.

The way he groaned set your body on fire, making you shivered in anticipation. You couldn't wait anymore, you leaned forward, placing a hand on the center of his chest for balance and lined yourself up over his hips.

Your breath hitched in your throat as you sank down on his dick. Of course you knew he was big, but this? This was heaven. You savored every bit, lowering yourself as slowly as you could, your fingers curling to grip at the hair on his chest. His hands roamed over your thighs and hips, squeezing at what he could reach of your ass.

When you finally bottomed out your eyes fluttered closed and a low groan clawed its way out of your chest.

"Fuck , Y/N…" Geralt breathed, fingers digging into your flesh.

Your eyes snapped open, a devilish grin on your face, "What? Do you want me to move?"

Before he could answer you clenched around his cock, getting a gasp and gritted teeth in response.

"What was that? I didn't hear you."

He opened his mouth to respond but you snapped your hips up and back down as fast as you could, grinding your hips against his in small circles. Whatever he was going to say turned into a string of curses that only spurred you on. You placed your other hand on his chest, rocking your hips slowly forward and up but swiftly back down.

Geralt looked completely undone, his hair splayed out almost like a halo and the firey need in his eyes made you move faster. Your thighs started to ache and your moans were coming out more like desperate whimpers. You leaned back, bringing a hand to your clit and one to your breast. You felt his cock twitch inside you and bit your bottom lip, changing the direction of your hip circles.

With a growl he gripped your hips and held you down against him, sitting up and turning to sit on his heels.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed at his jaw, letting him hold you to him without moving, "Did I earn it?" You whispered, almost hoping you hadn't with how good it felt to just be filled by him.

He let loose a breathy laugh, "Fuck you."

You rocked your body closer to him, gripping his hair in one of your hands, "Oh gods please do."

He bucked his hips against yours driving your whole body up in the air, and pulled you back down with one hand at your hip and one wrapped behind your back holding onto your shoulder. He set a rough, fast pace and you cried out every time your hips slapped against his.

You felt yourself losing all the strength in your limbs, almost unable to keep hold of his shoulders, and that familiar tingle creeping up your spine.

"Mm-f- fuck I'm close."

"Good." Geralt growled, snapping his hips up somehow faster and harder, sending you hurtling over the edge of your orgasm. You yanked on his hair as your whole body was flooded with electric pleasure, leaving you gasping for air. He came right after you, moaning soft and low as you writhed on top of him.

As your high began to fade, you rocked your hips against his more methodically, working him through the last of his orgasm. You gently tugged at his hair to tilt his head back, placing soft kisses along his jugular and over his Adams apple. His arms wrapped around your waist and held you tightly to him as his breathing slowed. When you made your way up to his chin and jawline he leaned you back onto the bed, pulling out and flopping onto the mattress next to you.

It was deathly silent as the two of you caught your breath. The predicament you found yourselves in seemed to dawn on the both of you, only you saw absolutely no sign from Geralt how he felt about it.

Later. Don't ruin this. Talk about it tomorrow. Or never.

"Did we intimidate them?" You did your best to make it sound like a joke, pointing at the wall to indicate the silence.

He snorted, rolling onto his side facing you, "No idea. I was distracted."

You giggled, shimmying closer to him and tucking your head under his chin, "Yeah, thanks for that. Good distraction."

He draped an arm over your waist, "What high praise…"

"Ssshhhhh," you leaned back and placed a finger over his lips, "I'm trying to sleep here."

He hummed against your touch, lips thinning into a soft smile.

It would have been entirely natural for you to lean forward and kiss him, even expected in such a situation, but you couldn't. That crossed the friendship line, as if it wasn't already blurred beyond recognition. Instead you nuzzled into his chest, snaking your arm under his and holding him close, savoring every moment. After all, when the heartbreak eventually set in you'd need something to cling to, even if it was just the memory of his touch.

__________

Uhm some of yall wanted to be tagged in the next part and i stg i could cry with how happy that made me! If anyone else wants tagged just hmu 💕💕

@ab-haya @fire-in-her-veinz

part 6 here!

#its not romantic its pragmatic #geralt of rivia smut #geralt of rivia fic #geralt of rivia fan fic #geralt of rivia x reader #geralt of rivia x reader smut #geralt smut #geralt x reader #geralt x reader smut #geralt x reader fic #the witcher #the witcher smut #the witcher fanfic #the witcher fic #geralt fic #geralt oneshot

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thethirdwheel404 · 4 years ago

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Med Rewatch Series (#1)

Right, monkey brain said no sleep no rest, only suffering at the hands of med.

I am going to start with the first episode of S2: Soul Care. Reasoning? I need to check if Latham references Ava in his first interaction with Connor.

If my memory serves me right, when Connor is passed over to Latham for his fellowship, Latham says that he was not his first choice. In fact, his first choice was a brilliant surgeon from South Africa. In the first episode of S2, a season where Ava Bekker is only introduced with one line at the end of the last episode.

If I remember correctly and Latham does actually say that in the first ep of s2, it will be huge for the continuity (and my theory that I came up with today, if you’re interested in following this you should really read that really long post that came a little before this where the basis of the theory is laid out).

Also in rewatching this I see more of Sarah which, again, I have not seen in two years, and she was the reason I became invested in the show, and the reason I stopped watching after she left.

And all of this even before I start the episode.

There are so many emotions and thoughts running through my brain it literally hurts. I think i’m getting a headache. I’m already really regretting this, this cannot be healthy for me.

(btw, this will basically be a train of thought type thing, I’ll do my best to keep it coherent)

- omg its starting

- i completely forgot how s1 ended but its not importnat in anyway

- just, why are they in a helicopter

- how fast does the episode move ive forgotten and i need to know

-JESUS CHRIST SO DRAMATIC

- THE BEGINNING WITH WILL WHY

- it is at this point where I apologize to all those who made it this far bc we’re literally not even 30 seconds in yet

- i just have a lot of med thoughts

- oh god save me

- i am laughing hysterically

- JESUS CHRIST THE APRIL TB STORYLINE AND TATE WTF

- god that feels like a lifetime ago it was relevant holyshit

-remember when she was pregnant?

- literally what have I missed

- side note, i really like the cup april drinks out of.

-THERE SHE IS

-SARAH

-SHE’S HERE

-and she’s a barista

-literally wtf is this show

-and the dramatic music is still going literally chill man god

-THE WAY SARAH SMILES HOLY SHITTTT come on man there was literally no way i’d survive this but fuck not even a minute in...

- okay but i never understood charles’ family scenario but this is already too fucking long for a minute in so i hope we can just skip past that

-hahahah sharon’s fucking divorce? holy shit, this is too dramatic for the first ep literally save me (at least she acts well)

-yeah the one thing I will say about med (thats a lie ive already said a hundred but yk) is that for the crap storylines and all, the actors take what they’re given and give it their all and i appreciate it so much

-the helicopter’s number is N365UCC and just... succ

-ethans bird (!)

-also the fact that’s so big for ethan to be chief resident is so weird to me. like the last medical drama I watched was greys and they are all like grizzled veterans and have been doing that stuff for actual decades and i tend to put med and greys on like the same level bc they are the only medical dramas ive watched but.. holy crap the people on med are so young?? half their main cast is med students and residents. when nearly every main character on greys is a department head. its wild.

-proud of ethan. proud of my boy (did you know that adam jacobs who played aladdin on broadway was in a s3 episode? fun facts) (fun fact: did you know that ava is the only main character on the show who’s status is now deceased? I’ll shut up now.)

-oh my god i say roland buck III’s name and GOD noah jesus

- i find noah incredibly annoying, especially bc he tries to overshadow reese (my fav) but also just bc hes spoiled [that thing that said that one of the biggest mistakes med made was not having sarah get the emergency med residency at the end of s1 comes to mine, and the fact that noah got his residency easy peasy] - but, i will say that the moment at the end of this season where noah and reese dance together at the party is very adorable. (pre reesker brain showing lmao I really did love sarah with my whole heart) (moreover my snapchat memories were filled with just recordings of reese scenes lmaooooo)

-okay at this point I need to stop once i get to the potential ava thing bc what is happening we’re not even two minutes in why is this so long. (so many thoughts)

- i find will annoying but,,, he is kind of nice to look at. and what i mean is like facial acting (i am a lesbian). like. just. don’t speak. and when he’s being a good character he’s fine. it’s very few and very far between ig

-natalie annoys me so much and shes only had one line, and it wasn’t even a character line, it was mainly exposition.

-EW

-FUCKING EW

-ITS CONNOR HE’S HERE. god i forgot what he looked like in red scrubs and his poofy hair. child compared to s3 and s4. hopefully we see latham soon so we all don’t have to suffer through this. and he looks so angsty. he definetly glowed up in the later seasons.

- i have no clue how to spell definetly. I am guessing literally everytime.

-latham please come and end this all.

-oh haha there’s downey hes dead.

-okay so i actually watched s1 after i watched s2 which is so weird to think about. like that means that i liked s2 so much that i BOUGHT THE DVD FOR S1. yeah. I liked it that much (it really only means I was that much of a simp for sarah). but it also means that technically i watched s1 after i met ava?? like i honestly had NO CLUE what was in my future. did young me ever think she was going to stay up late at night, avoiding history hw while analyzing a defunct character from this show on a whim? a character i was super annoyed with at the beginning? who has no become a huge part of my personality? honestly? no. no she did not.

-and the story with downey was so jarring. and the story with zanetti. like i think i first started watching with the first ep of s2 (the one im talking about rn) and i was a bit lost. so going back and watch s1 to like connect the dots. but i never expected the dots to look like that. its like each season of this show is a completely different show from all the other seasons. like i’ve said before, this show is a headache. but literally latham please come and end this for now.

-GOD CONNOR LOOKS SO YOUNG WHAT THE HELL thats so weird lmaooooo

- like i had absolutely no clue who downey was going into this. and they they started talking like ‘oh yeah he killed his attending’ and i was just like ‘damn bro ill cheers to that’

- that’s literally ava’s first line actually. “i heard your girlfriend went insane and you murdered your attending.” - which was why she was hated at first. that was literally her first line to connor which is like, so hilariously rude that it was instantly iconic.

-also HAHAHAHAH CUE FUCKING ANGST ABOUT CONNOR HURTING EVERYONE AROUND HIM WTF BRO THE EFFECT YOU HAVE ON PEOPLE

- but i’m also sad now. --- “I heard your girlfriend went insane.” Oh. Oh, sweetie. Ava... No. --- but why does s2 ava (all two lines) foreshadow s4 ava in so many ways. like literally what were the writers on.

-baghdad.

-ah yes. the return of baghdad. been a long time since i heard that one, but it is easily one of my favorite running things about med. its just a little detail but the nick name is like perfect. (when i read fanfic where the chars are actually doing doctor stuff in the hospital it makes me light up) the WORLD BUILDINGGGGG. but whatever

-this is the girl who has the fake baby right? that was a really good ep (bc sarah content. can you see my favorites? for the same reason the one where the girl has split personalities easily ranks high with me.) oh wait this is the one where the dad like dies but then comes back for a split second to see his grand child. there’s not really a lot I can say about that, but the fact that i remember it vividly is... weird.

-okay but I actually love the ED in this show. I love how the show is centered around the ED and not the OR like greys. its fast paced, you see a lot about the characters really quickly (one of the reason’s connor’s intro to the hospital in the pilot is certified iconic in my mind [his interactions with will are gold]). the team works well together (usually, when things are good. - which is another reason I hated the show more as time went on. The personal lives interfered more and more and more with their work as time went on. it got so annoying). but like right here will just calls maggies name and maggie is just On It. I love it. I love the fast pace. it’s why this show got me to come back. so many things happen, it overloads my brain, like the way a video game works y occupying all of your attention.

-when is the dad gonna pass out i’m just waiting

-AHAHAHAHAHA JEFF NOOOOO. what even was the deal with jeff that storyline annoyed me so much I never got it. he was friends with nat’s husband (who died) and they were both named Jeff? and she actually ended up getting with Jeff a few times?

- the more you watch med and see how the characters get with each other, the more jaded you become

-omg they’re transferring the girl to the bed i love it when they count

-maggie was great but from what i heard/read they ruined her character too??? just not the same

-lmao only real g’s remember the chicago fire backdoor med pilot (if you want an explanation ask me lmao it was a ride)

- i was a real med simp bc I bought that episode on apple video.

-ahahaha this is so stupid. Jeff tries to do things and Will (being a fucking asshole and jealous, doesnt’ let him). he’s a med student let him fucking learn. also i remember why i hated will

-okay but if you look at greys vs. med, greys literally gives their med students no rights. scratch that. they give they’re interns little to no rights. (i only watched the last three seasons bc lesbian, but in those seasons they introduce the bottom of the totem pole, the sub I’s, who are a step ahead of med students, yet they are jokes on the show.) its just a weird juxtaposition is all.

-”lungs are wet.” dramatic music intensifies.

-OKAY BUT I LITERALLY FORGOT NATALIE SPECIALIZED IN PEDS. LIKE I COMPLETELY 100% FORGOT. HOLY SHIT THATS SO FUNNY i can’t believe in my mass hyperfixation i forgot, just more proof that she doesn’t deserve anything.

-why did will make nat do that call? also idk why but is it weird to anyone else when the characters call each other but just.. their names.

-ahahahah i laugh literally everytime i remember that will is supposed to be in charge like he is threatened by anything that MOVES. (also more juxtapositon to greys bc here the attendings are treated as a joke!)

- hly shit i just remember monday mourning and god damn the angst literally never takes a day off but whatever.

- i dont usually get like this but the dad’s acting here is actually making me sad lol. Usually i get annoyed when family members get emotional (im weird uhhhh)

-why did we have to watch the tube being put in for so long - med is so dramatic this fucking show whyyyy

- i bet u the dad is gonna pass out

-oh ig not oops

-OKAY FUCK ME THAT LITERALLY ONLY TOOK US TO THE TITLES HOW DO I HAVE THESE MANY FUCKING THOUGHTS.

-wait latham introduction we may just be able to call it here.

-haha i fucking hate him (connor). he just... comes off so fake-charming its annoying. i cant get over it lmao

-okay but literally every gives connor shit and I am here for it. Latham: “did you kill him?”

- it is literally so funny but annoy how connor throws hands with literally everyone in his path (like dude just chill come onnn)

-okay. okay. okay. finally the part i was waiting for.

- Latham: I preferred a young woman from Groote Schuur, but I was outvoted.

That’s an actual quote, from Latham. For those who are wondering, Groote Schuur is a famous hospital in, you guessed it, South Africa. This is where I’m calling the episode. This is all I needed.

I just want to restate. This is the first episode of season 2. Ava Bekker is introduced to the show in the last episode of season 2. What does this mean, my friends? It means everything.

For those of you who stuck through to the end, I am very thankful. Here we have probably the first piece of evidence to my theory, at least chronologically.

I, personally, think it’s absurd I remembered this point, but I did. That point, that line, presently, watching this episode with no idea of what the future holds, is only there to tell us that Latham and Connor are not going to agree. But this is the single greatest piece of foreshadowing med has ever done.

Med has never planned anything. I feel confident when I say that. Look at their storylines. They are literally on fire, and every decision the characters make reads like the writers going ‘we have no idea how we made it this far, we thought we would get stopped like ten steps ago.’

When has med ever planned things more than a few episodes in advanced, honestly? Almost never, and going a full season sitting on a plot point, that’s major. This was the first time med has ever planned something miles in advance.

In all honestly, yes I am probably giving the med writers a lot more credit than they deserve. It’s quite possible that as the season progressed they just decided connor needed a new love interest or at least a new dynamic, so they could have just easily looked back and thought ‘oh, hey, here’s a fun little thing we said earlier in the season, wouldn’t it be fun if it paid off?’ That could be true.

Here’s why it probably isn’t. The med writers have no respect for their own continuity. you really think that, in order to come up with a whole new character, they went back to the first episode of the season and paid off a line that is said in less than 2 seconds? no way. Bull. Shit.

honestly, it is probably equally unlikely that either of these things happened. The med writers don’t look back at their story. It’s true, but they also don’t plan things in advance either.

here’s the thing, the more i write, the more absurd it starts to sound. Yeah. Sure. the med writers sat on a character for an entire season, that’s totally a thing that happened and not sarcasm. When pigs fly. everyone knows med is impulsive and messy. But what I am saying is that they planned one thing. One thing.

Ava has an accent. That was a commitment. A pretty uncommon one too. South Africa is such an out of the box choice that god its barely on the map. It asks a lot of someone to act hard while also doing an uncommon accent. If the med writers just decided they needed to give connor a new dynamic, they could have made it a n y o n e. Yeah, sure it would have been nice to have the latham dynamic with the new character, but it would have been so much easier to just create a new character that doesn’t have such a commitment. We all know people who play opposite of Connor Rhodes do not stay around that long.

There is absolutely no reason Connor’s s3 love interest had to be the girl from South Africa. It could have literally been anyone. They could have kept Robin on. They could have made the new character not have so many specific requirements.

At this point, I’m pushing this really hard. Yeah, obviously Ava was planned from the beginning of s2. She had to be. It’s way too specific to be anything else.

What I’m pointing out here is med has never done that before. (at least to my knowledge, if i’m wrong please tell me i don’t want to be a fool) They have never had such a concrete plan for a character, so much as to tease them a full season before they were introduced.

I’m saying, that Ava was special. She was the only character who was teased ahead of her arrival. The one who they knew they wanted, other than the originals, and honestly saying the ‘knew what they wanted to do with the originals’ is being generous. But Ava was different. They had big plans for Ava.

It’s undeniable. Ava was the only character who was planned and teased ahead of her arrival. Ava has such a different style and character than anyone else on the show. She was always planned to be, even when she was just being teased, a rival to connor, meaning she could stand her own against him (or without him).

Now of course, the med writers forgot this when writing s4 and s5. But for the purposes of the important things, all that really matters are the two mentions in s2, and what happens in s3. (for the theory at least).

In conclusion: think about how odd it is that Ava was the only character that was planned over the course of the show. Like sure the characters are planned, but never this far in advance. Med writers don’t really plan anything. I would be shocked if they did anything but through a dart at a spinning wheel. But they had plans for Ava, and they had plans for s3, when she was good.

Think about how odd it is that the med writers had a character planned from the start of s2, that they sat on for a whole season. They never, ever did something so slow and deliberate. Never. It goes against their formula. Like a fucking shark, they have to be moving or they die, at least in their heads. But Ava was always a change to the formula. They had a plan for s3.

that’s it for now. we will see what happens when i watch the last episode of s2.

read the next parts:

Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10 / Part 11 / Part 12 / Extra

#chicago med #med rewatch series #mine #soul care #ava bekker

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shhhhyoursister · 5 years ago

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hi friends i wrote this all yesterday and just never posted it i guess and these thoughts are definitely less coherent but!!!!! they’re valid!!!!! so here is the second edition of.....

MUSIC IN DRUCK (3x02)

quick musical doodles - i’m including this just cause it makes me laugh, cause it starts and the first notes hit kinda heavy, especially cause you can see matteo sitting on the steps just flopped over and it seems like it could potentially be the start to a serious scene, but then you see the BOYS coming in and then you see matteo looking slowly up at them and carlos’ fucking face kills me every time he looks like he’s trying so hard not to laugh but jonas and abdi are walking with like,, a hint of swag??? and then you can see the “what the fuck” on matteo’s face, that part is just hilarious and i had to mention it

obvs - so i didn’t think i’d have much to say about this song (plays during the scene where david and matteo are awkward gay stuttering and then leonie comes over) but i think the function of it is to highlight the whole nervous/stuttery/apprehensiveness of approaching/talking to someone you’re developing a crush on??? and how you can obviously hear the music during the moments of awkward silence and there are no words so you’re just kind focusing on the fact that they aren’t speaking and it plays until david is completely gone

8896 - so this song gets interesting when you look into the lyrics a lil more,, this song plays while matteo is watching david try to shove his bag in the locker (as this post said it’s heavy bottom imagery) and when i looked ho the lyrics i was like 🤔🤔🤔 because the first line is “you say there is nothing to hide” which is interesting because both matteo and david, at this point in the story, are hiding pretty big things about themselves!!!! it gets even MORE interesting later on when you look in the 2nd chorus and see “we’re running down roads and crossing track stones / pay for the ticket, just enjoy the circus / run away another day” that first line kinda made me think about them leaving leonie and sara to go to the pool (i know they were riding bikes but you get it) which is further cemented by the last line?? like how many songs did the druck crew manage to find that reference “running away”???? that must have been someone’s entire job!!!!!!!! (also the fact that this song that mentions hiding things and running away leads up to matteo googling how to have sex with a girl when you’re not into her.....)

go! - AKDKAKD okay y’all there’s not even that much for me to say about this one i just needed to include it cause the absolute CAMP of having matteo fantasize about david walking down the hallway staring at him and then twirling while a dramatic saxophone song plays in the background???? are you kidding me???? that’s comedy gold

where’s the catch? - this song goes from rap to basically a few different voices going “aaaAAAHHHHH” (in like a nice melodic way of course) as he sees david in the bus, and then they the beat kicks in again as matteo is doing his weird 👁👄👁 intense staring, and it’s a very steady beat and it was kinda making me think about when you’re standing near your crush and you can kinda feel your heart beating a little harder and faster and you can maybe hear it a little in your ears and your palms are sweaty (moms spaghetti) and you’re trying to not be weird (matteo definitely did not succeed at that) and you’re just excited?? that’s the vibe i got with this song in this part, esp cause it sounds like it’s in kind of a weird key so it’s really driving in that “this is exciting but strange and kinda nerve wracking but i don’t hate it” vibe ya know??

**jazz - okay so i think this was such a fucking good song to play for this part???? “drink more water” is just....idk really funny to me?? but also the song itself is really chill and playing a rap song if they knew they were gonna cut the sound of the dialogue out was a really smart type of song to choose!!!! like it’s obvious that matteo is just staring at him and losing his mind over having a cute boy at his place, and the way they cut the words out when matteo and david are talking and slowly fade it out....it’s good dude it’s VERY good

love$ick - this song starts with a very interesting lil percussion bit that really sets up the tone for this part of the clip??? it’s fun and catchy and has an interesting beat and mixes really well with the sounds of two high dumbasses cooking gross sandwiches and falling in love :,,) it’s also kind of interesting that they chose to play a part with no words while they are cooking because there is very little actual dialogue, so unlike before where they filled the silence with fast rap, here they really want you to focus on the smaller details and the way their bodies already naturally kind of move around each other very well?? and the way they end it right after the boys each take a bite of the sandwich is really funny to me just cause you can obviously hear the *crunch* and then it stops and you hear them both going like “hmmm” “mhm” and the “weird....but also good??” i think i love every single decision this show has made so far with the music tbh

**go rilla - this song starts playing like the second before matteo picks up davids beanie, and it definitely isn’t the happiest sounding song, but while it has kind of a sadness to it the music drives in a way that makes the vibe more that matteo is sad that david left, but seeing the beanie is a moment of “oh, but now i get to interact with him again” so it’s a hopeful kind of sadness?? i’ve definitely talked about the hopefulness of some of the songs before but i feel like its the correct word?? like as a viewer i’m hearing that song and seeing him hold the beanie and i’m thinking to myself “oh, davids gone, but it’s not over yet folks!!!!”

ahh hope this was okay hope y’all enjoy readin my stupud ass thoughts about this topic lol next one soon??? probably??????

#noggins #druck #matteo florenzi #david schreibner #davenzi #music in druck #3x02 #druck 3x02

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sleepyanddraw · 5 years ago

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I HAVE A THEORY! pt 2

Alright back where I last started from. So Here we are, talking about the second part to my theory. Told you it was going to be long one, but trust me. I think it worth the time to sometime hear my rambling or what I think. So let’s talk about the Double Agent part 2.

Here the first part if you haven’t read it-------> 1

2. Double Agent

Being a Double Agent is not Easy! NO one come out smelling like a fresh daisy after doing that type of work. I said this because it really not that simple. Getting information is the easy part but when you develop feeling for other. That start to become very conflicting. It’s been demonstrated multiple time in Cartoons, and some anime. It never goes well.

For Hawk, that will Happen to him too. He have a good heart, but at the same time not completely black and white Either. Remember in the last post that I talk about his individuality and choices? The Double Agent work that he’ll be doing would actually allow him to find himself but others Villain would value his opinion, emotions, and him as whole person instead of just a hero. Compare to how the commission treat him, the villain would definitely treat him differently.

I mean the League of Villain actually treat with each other with respect and care for one another. They develop a bond of friendship. They also is not all black and white as Hawk see it as such. As of now, he seem very disgusted to be working with criminal cause he think they’ll nothing but mischief and disturbing peace. As he does more double agent work though, he’ll see that there is more to it. Not only that, but I can see him becoming more empathy to their cause. Since League of Villain’s goal is some form of way, want to fix Society .Something that I feel that line with Hawk’s goal.

Remember what he say?...If you don’t, That’s okay, here the images.

and this....

and then you have this, little foreshadow....

He want to make life easier, not just for himself, but for others as well. And if you think about it a little bit more, it somewhat line up with the Villain’s goal too. Especially if you think about what Himiko Toga say how its too hard to live nowadays, and want to make life easier. She say this when she was firstly introduce in the League of Villains. Is that Coincidence that Hawk want something of the same thing like Himiko? I don’t think so at all.

Hawk’s goals line with them, and even though he doesn’t see it yet. He will eventually. Especially since Hawk have a strong resolve, and when he have a goal. He will always reach that goal no matter what.

At some point in time, He’ll side with them after forming that bond and will become more reluctant to give information of what he knows to the commission.

I also like to bet that hawk’s past might be reveal too as the more he work with the League of Villain the more we get to know him. How it will be tell, though, that’s in the air.

Now, to the next part.

3. Icarus

Okay, So we all know the story of Icarus right? I mean we all read it at some point in time in Elementary Schools or on our free time, but for those that haven’t. The story tell of Icarus, son of Daedulus who fly too near the sun on wings of feathers and wax. Who didn’t heed the warning of his father and plunged to his death toward the sea.

Not exactly a happy ending for poor Icarus, but I’m discussing this cause it very similar to Hawk.

Hawk as he describe himself in the manga as the man that’s a bit too fast. He really is a fast guy, so fast that he leave his sidekicks behind, and they have to clean up the aftermath of his fights. He never stops basically.

So, How does this related to Icarus?

Well, I did some research of Moral of Icarus and came across of Pride and Punishment as the theme. It’s was basically a lesson on Humility, and accepting your Mortal Limits. Pride falls into Daedulus but the punishment falls into Icarus. Cause Icarus refuse to accepts his limits, and in the process falls to his death when trying to fly toward the sun.

Do I think it plays a part into Hawk’s death? No, I don’t think so but I highly doubt Horikoshi wouldn’t make it that obvious. It more like it playing part him being a fallen hero and what path Horikoshi have set him on. We can also added to Hawk’s limitation as well.

Hawks doesn’t know his own limits or refuse to accepts his limits. We can even apply to his relationship with Endeavor. There are boundary for reason, step over them and you can get hurt.

We know he also getting buddy with Dabi, too, but the one that’s going to hurt him the most is Endeavor.

Let’s think about Icarus’s Symbolism again and see who connect to who. Which is not a lot by the way.

Icarus= Hawk

Sun= Endeavor

and you know what? why not change that story too a little bit.

Icarus got too close to the sun and fallen.

Hawk got too close to Endeavor and Fallen.

Now before you say, why can’t the sun be Dabi, well simply his flame is blue, and play more into cremation. Endeavor’s fire is orange, and his hero Name definition is “try hard to do or achieve something”. Perfectly matching how Icarus try to reach the sun. I’m not completely ruling out Dabi. I think he playing a part into this as well, but where...I don’t know.

Another thing is that Hawk is trying to get close to Endeavor. Remember, He is a big fan of Endeavor. Hawk want to know him more, and be very helpful to him. He want to be more than just being a co-worker and right hand man, but possibly a very close friend.

Right Now, Hawk seen Endeavor as the Flame of Hope, but since he interacting him and the mysterious villain Dabi.

Well, What if Endeavor’s life come into the light? You know, the abuse that he did to his family.

We don’t know a lot about Hawk and what he been through, but I’m pretty sure he went through some hard time himself and what probably kept him going was Endeavor. If Hawk found out about Endeavor’s abuse, that would definitely change Hawk. Of course, other stuff would to, but it would make him a fallen hero.

I even did some research on what define a fallen hero, and here what its say.

This information came from TV tropes, but it very clear what a Fallen Hero is. It have been something devastating that make them do a “Face-Heel Turn”.

Geez, what would make a hero do a “Face-Heel Turn”? Maybe learning true about Endeavor’s wrong doing?

I think that would be enough to change Hawk’s view but also change his goal to align with the villains. Especially since he will learn more from the League of Villains that play even more into changing his mind.

Now, Do, I think Hawk will be a full on Villain, that want to do bad stuff. No..A fallen hero still have some good traits. And that when I started to think is, “What type of Villain would Hawk be?”

So, I did more research on type of Villain and came across “Anti Villain.” But just for information sake, here some type of fallen Heroes role down below.

But, the Anti Villain caught my eye the most and this definition what an “Anti Villain” is :

I cut it up, but you can read it together. Sorry for the Blur. This is information is also from TV tropes as well. It list what they do and what they are.

and the personality aspect...

and there you have it. When I read this myself I was surprise. You know why, cause it match some of Hawk’s characteristic and some of his action of what he did so far in the Manga. Including the latest chapter, 240!

Here some example, not the greatest until he do more in the manga but just some small tidbits.

*When the High end Nomu attack, Hawk did Mock Endeavor a little bit.

* He knew of the High end Nomu, and even though it create destruction. He saw that the benefit, as it let Endeavor carve his way to be Number 1 hero. He wasn’t completely upset as long Endeavor won at the end of it. He did feel guilty though cause Endeavor did get hurt at the end.

SPOILERS!!! from the Chapter 240

* Hawk kill best Jeanist( until the manga say otherwise, I’m going to say that the hero is dead) He did so in order to join the League of Villain. Hawk didn’t have to and could have easily stop the job there, but didn’t. Killing best jeanist ensure his spot and continue his double agents work. Hawk saw it as the greater good, and make sure that he did what he suppose to.

See I told you, it wasn’t a lot but just some small example. So that the kind of Villain I think Hawk will be and path that Horikoshi have set him on. Of course he still hero for now, but as the manga continue I bet that going to change more and more until Hawk blurred that Line of what make Hero or a Villain.

and that it.

I think that’s all my ramble and what I think. If you stick this long, then thank you for reading. I know not all my thought is coherent as should be, but all of this was My thinking and attempt to the piece together the puzzle that Hawk will be a fallen Hero.

Do I think this might happen? No, of course not. After all, this is just a theory. Until more information comes.

Oh, and if you have some thoughts of your own. I would love to hear it.

Anyway thanks for reading. :)

#my hero academia #bnha hawks #hawk #my hero academia theory #long post #icarus #endeavor #villain hawks #villain hawk #league of villains

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kayluh1915 · 4 years ago

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Questions for Fanfic Authors.

I answered these like... five years ago or so, but because the 6th anniversary of my first ever posted fanfic is coming up, so I thought I’d do this again just to see how far I’ve come over the years. It’s always nice to look back to see just how much you’ve changed and grown as a person.

Enjoy this completely useless information!

Stuck it under the cut because I don’t want to take up your dash space! <3

1. Describe yourself how you would describe a character you’re introducing. The young woman was shorter than average with long, curly brunette hair and eyes that matched the color of warm sea water . Although plus sized, she was healthy and stout especially in her legs where her muscles were the most defined. She was indeed a beautiful young woman.

2. Is there any specific ritual you go through while/before/after your writing? Eh, not really. I usually just get an idea and run with to see where it goes. If I think it’s worth exploring, I’ll properly plan or whatever needs to be done to flesh it out. At most, I listen to some ambiance to keep my ADHD occupied.

3. What Is Your ABSOLUTE FAVORITE kind of fic to write? As some of you already know, my guilty pleasures are mpreg, sickfics, and angst. My newest one is A/B/O, but I’m very picky about how it’s written and I have yet to write anything with it (hint hint, wink wink). I also enjoy writing smut, but I don’t normally post it.

4. Are there any other fic writers you admire? If so, who and why? I have a few, but they’re all spread out between different fandoms.

5. How many words can you write if you sit down and concentrate intensely for an hour? It depends. It’s rare for me to be able to focus that long unless I’m in a hyper-focus. I think my record is around 3,000 or so.

6. First fic/pairing you wrote for? I first wrote for the Ianthony fandom and my first story was a Oneshot I called “Polar Bear Swimming.” My first multi-chaptered fic was also for the Ianthony fandom and it’s called “Miracle.” Both are almost six-years-old and I don’t recommend reading them if you want to keep your eyesight, but they’re still up if you’re a daredevil. Just read at your own risk.

7. Inspiration, Time, Or Motivation? Choose Two. Inspiration is usually never that big of an issue for me, so definitely time and motivation.

8. Why do you choose to write? It’s an escape from reality... and it’s just really fun to pair people together. It most likely will never happen in real life, but it sure is fun as hell to make it happen in works of fiction. I also can’t draw worth crap, so words had to do.

9. Do you have plans to write anything other than Fanfiction? I might at some point. I wanted to have a book published not fanfic related by the time I was 21, but I’m 24 now and it hasn’t happened yet. Maybe one day, but for now I’m pretty content with writing fanfic.

10. What inspires you the most? Anything can be inspiration for me.

11. Weirdest thing you’ve ever written/thought about writing? Most of the things I write and think about are pretty normal for shippers, but the non-trans mpreg and A/B/O is definitely weird to the average person so probably that.

12. Fic(s) that you wished you had written better. EVERYTHING on my Wattpad. Everything over there absolutely reeks of new shipper and first time writer, but I keep it up just as a reminder of how much I have improved over the years. If you check it out, please do so at your own risk.

13. Favorite fic from another author? I have different ones spread through different fandoms, so I guess I’ll just name one from each fandom I’ve participated in. Some of these are old, but they’re still great!

Ianthony: Brilliant Blood, Beautiful Bones by @holmessexual-subtext. In fact, all of their works are just wonderful. Love you, Patricia! <3

Rhink: The Murmur of Yearning by @its-mike-kapufty. A wonderful writer/beta and an even better person. Hope you’re doing well, sweetie! <3

Victuuri: The Shadows On My Wall Don't Sleep

Danvin: The Robin to your Batman (the Louis Lane to your Superman)

Reylo: Baby, It's Just Biology

Freewood: Life is Good

14.Your favorite side pairings to put in? I tend to not use side pairings, but when I do it’s usually taken from real life couples.

15. Your guilty writing pleasure? Same as number three.

16.Do you have structured ideas of how your story is supposed to go, or make it up as you write? Normally, when I get an idea, I just throw it out on a word document. There’s no structure to it, it’s literal brain splatter. If I think it’s worth writing, I’ll then flesh it out to make it coherent. I used to do this only for my chaptered stories, but I now do this with my oneshots as well.

17. Would you describe yourself as a fast writer? Eh, it depends. Sometimes if I’m hyper-focused, I can usually type things out pretty fast, but more often than not, it takes a while.

18. How old were you when you first started writing? I wrote my first story on Microsoft Word 2003 when I was eight or nine-years-old. It was called The Little Ice Skater and it was just a poor retelling of the Disney movie Ice Princess and it was typed with caps lock on because I thought it looked cool.

19: Why did you start writing? I HATED reading stories because there would always be something about them that I wanted to change, so I guess my little 4th grade self just got tired of it and started making her own.

20. Four sentences from a work that you’re most proud of.

He’d known for years that Dan loved him no matter what, but what about his friends and coworkers? Would they have looked at him differently? Or would he even have any friends left at all? The answer seemed obvious now, but at the time he had been so unsure.

From my most recent in-progress fic Don’t Be Afraid of Who You Are for the Danvin fandom. It does contain trans-mpreg (shocker, i know) so if you wanna give it a chance, please be aware of that.

#kayla's ramblings #questions for fanfic authors #i would tag fandoms since i mention like six in this post but i don't want to clutter their tags so this is it

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all-at-once-you-are-the-one · 5 years ago

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Stream of Consciousness Lover Album Reaction

I wrote out my first thoughts while listening to the album and put them in one big post. I hope you find them as funny as I do lmao

1. I Forget That You Existed

LOL so that’s what the drake Easter egg was about!

Who is this about????

NIIIIiiiiiiiiiIIIiiiiCE

SHE SOUNDS SO GOOD

I JUST FORGOT WHAT THEY WERE LMAOOO

HER LAUGH!! SO CUTE!!

This track is somehow savage and adorable at the same time

So......yeah.......

ShnfhKJHGKSHDKGHSKGHSJG

2. Cruel Summer

This is giving me Katy perry vibes

The devils roll their dice line is from this?? Didn’t expect that

This is maybe the catchiest song I’ve ever heard

Why is this not a single??????

STILL DONT KNOW WHAT SUMMERS A KNIFE MEANS

EXPLAIN TAYLOR

This also kind of gives me Jonas brothers vibes, why???

Again.....what is this about???

OooOOoooOooWhoooooAAAAhh i loveeee this

OOOH no you know what this gives me GETAWAY CAR vibes

Wait...do we think that at the beginning joe wanted to keep their relationship private and Taylor agreed but then changed her mind? WAIT NO.....is this about her having to keep her love for joe secret at first the summer they met because she was with someone else/it was too soon??

3. Lover

Ok SUPER WEIRD transition into lover but OK

As much as I love albums with a clear narrative like rep I also like being all over the place so this is fine

CAN I GO WHERE YOU GOOOOOO

FOR EVER AND EVER ANDIIIII

YOURE MY MY MY MYYYYY LOVER

I wonder what inspired her to use the term lover? Does she not know that normal people don’t speak like that?

WAIT IS THE REASON LOVER COMES AFTER CRUEL SUMMER because of the 3 summers line?? Like look how we started...now were here

Does the album begin with i forgot you existed because its like ok this Kanye situation happened...but now were gonna forget about that and talk about the realer real story of the past couple years of my life rather than seeing it through the lens of that story like on rep

4. The Man

THE ACCURACY

THE ACCURAACCCCYYYYYYYYY

IT HUUURRTTSSS

Honestly though i actually thought this one would be more savage, i thi

DID SHE JUST SAY BITCHES AND MODELSSSS?????

SLJGSHUKGHKDG

Never mind this is as savage as i wanted

I should know better than to judge a Taylor song before the bridge

Again why isn’t this a single.....it better be

5. The Archer

The emotional whiplash this album is giving me is insane.

It’s like RED but with synths

Is the archer placed here because part of her lack of self confidence comes from the things the media says about her (because she’s a woman not a man?) INTERESTING THOUGHT

Don’t have much else to say about this, we already know

.....

Wow the cake i bought for tonight is somehow way too sweet

6. I Think He Knows

Definitely didn’t think i think he knows was about being horny af

But this is so catchy

Why is everything so catchy?? Literally every song should be a single

BOY I UNDERSTAND the confidence!! After the archer!! I love that he makes her feel that way1!!

I THINK HE KNOOOOOOOWWWWSS

This gives me teenage dream vibes and i fucking love that song

7. Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince

Ok time for the one with the weird title

I love how she keeps comparing her current feelings to how she felt as a teenager!! How its the same and different....very good.

SHES A BAD BAD GIRL

More dice!

Is she imagining what it would be like if she was in this relationship in high school? Because I DO THAT ALL THE TIIIIME GIRL SAME

THATS MY WHOLE WORLD SOOOO CUUUUTE

YOU PLAY STUPID GAMES YOU WIN STUPID PRIZES

VOTED

MOST

LIKELY

RUN

AWAY

WITH

YOU

I really like this one. I didn’t expect I would.

This should be a single.

8. Paper Rings

THE VOICE EFFECT

She’s singing so fast on these songs!!!! I CANT KEEP UPP

UH HUH

THATS RIGHT

This is so retro and i loooooooooooooooooooooove it

DIRTY DREAMS??????? TAYLOR PLEASE

OMG THE COLOUR WE PAINTED YOUR BROTHERS WALL

THE PICTURE

FROM THE REP MAGAZINES

SDIHGUSHGUKHDZRKUGHKUDZHGUHDZGHDKZHGYIDZJLGJLDJGJSDJGDHZGHLGHLSHGHDG

II LIKE SHINY THINGS

THIS SONG IS SO FUN! ALL THESE SONGS ARE SO FUN!!

Ok baby boy that’s kinda weird but you know what..

....

Ok its still weird but maybe it will grow on me

This should be a single.

9. Cornelia Street

HERE IT IS!!! THE FIRST TAYLOR PRODUCED SONG

I NEVER WANT CORNELIA STREET AGAIN?? WHAT IS THIS ABOUT?? THEIR WORST FIGHT? ANOTHER RELATIONSIP? QUESTIONS

The storytelling!

Wait......is this about before they ran away together in CIWYW?? Like she thought he didn’t really want her so she was gonna run away alone...but then he was like no i really do lets go

I totally thought that this was the one with the staring out the window like I’m not your favorite town line was from

She ended it with the line she started with (i think)? Ike she used to!

Kinda feel like people hyped this one up too much but i do like it

10. Death by a Thousand Cuts

The piano!!!!

Like a thousand notes a thousand cuts

Look through the windows of this love - like the heart on her eye! I get it I GET IT lmaoooo

If this song was on red it would have the saddest production but on this album its a bop

11. London Boy

IS THAT JOE??? OMG lmao

HER ACCENT LMAOOOOOOOOO

I don’t know if this song is supposed to be as hilarious as i think it is but i really do think its hilarious

What does like a Tennessee Stella McCartney even mean????

I kinda feel like this song is too specific to her life to be relatable so maybe that’s why i feel that way about it?

12. Soon You’ll Get Better

Ok great... so we went from that to the sad one

I have to prepare

I didn’t tell you i was scared....

Cause you have to...

The fact that this is the country song...

I cant

GOD NOW IM CRYING THIS IS SO SAD

That was the only song so far i had to actually stop typing for. God....I’m so sad for her and her family.

13. False God

I can barely take this song in because of what just came before.

But i really like it. And i really like the theme of religion on this album

14. You Need to Calm Down

NOW YNTCD IS PLAYING

??? IM LITERALLY SOO SAD FROM SOON YOULL GET BETTER STILL

I CANT

PROCESS

THIS

This album is literally all over the place, i keep trying to assign a narrative to it and its not working out so I’m just gonna give up

Sometimes albums are just collections of songs and not a coherent, linear story and that is ok! Even if its not what i prefer

It certainly didn’t bother me on her first few albums.

The one thing i take away from this is like...no wonder she’s so determined to be so overly positive, i think for her its that or break down crying in the face of what’s happening in her family

15. Afterglow

I really love this song!!! Hashtag relatable

......

Man..you can really tell even just from my typing that my heart isn’t in this anymore after that song

Fuck

I think I’m just sad for me too, because i know that i will go through that too sooner rather than later and I already have friends dealing with losing a parent.

16. ME!

My only thought on this is god bless brendon Urie for injecting so much additional joy and energy into this song and making Taylor happy, i just get the vibe that she really needed that

ALSO WHAT THERES REALLY NO HEY KIDS SPELLING IS FUN

TAYLOR EXPLAAIAIIIIIIIAIAIIAN

We’ll see if its on my physical cd copies when they arrive...if not then maybe it was always planned to be a line only in the single version

17. It’s Nice to Have a Friend

Ok I don’t really like this song that much but i really like the messages she’s trying to send like...real love feels like hanging out with a childhood bestie, so comfortable

18. Daylight

I WAS LIKE MEH

BUT THE FUCKING BRIDGE

THE BRIDGE

IM EMOTIONALLY DESTROYED

Also something about the chorus reminds me of the chorus of starlight

STEP INTO THE DAYLIGHT AND LET IT GO

YES

I WAS LIKE NO IS THAT NOT A LYRIC??

BUT IT ISTHANK GOD

THE END

YOU ARE WHAT YOU LOVE

THAT WAS LIKE

MY MANTRA FOR A COUPLE YEARS A WHILE BACK

BECAUSE

I LOVED SO MANY PEOPLE BUT THEY DIDNT LOVE ME

AND I WANTED TO BE DEFINITED BY THE FACT THAT I LOVED THEM NOT THAT HTEY DIDNT LOVE ME

IIIIIIIIIIII

IN CONCLUSION:

My feelings are everywhere. Some songs disappointed me but some blew me away - soon you’ll get better is basically the new Never Grow Up for me which is saying a lot. Everything is catchy a hell though even the songs I didn’t like as much. Ultimately i would have liked more songs about varying subject matter esp. self love but as it is, it is still somehow so all over the place. It really just shows how many emotions and phases can be contained within one relationship (i mean I’m assuming every song about a relationship is about joe). I really think that the song about her mom maybe should have been placed somewhere else...I don’t know where I would have put it but that shit is HEAVY. I am so honored that she and her family would share that with us though. I have a million question about how Andrea is doing and if my theory on why tour hasn’t been announced is correct...maybe she will explain more in the interviews/secret session audio we’re getting in the next couple days. I think my favorite song is Lover but that may change. I don’t think any song on here tops my current all time favorite Taylor song though which is CIWYW. That’s a little disappointing but not every song or album has to be my fave! And this album will probably grow on me esp as i hear Taylor’s explanations of it. Rep did. I really did nooott feel good about most of rep at first, it took a few days.

#lover reaction #lover album reaction #lover #taylor swift

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bamby0304 · 6 years ago

Text

Bamby Reacts- SPN 14x08

Okay so, I’m at it again. I thought… well… I go on my dash and see spoilers (which I don’t mind) and so I know what’s coming but, like, I don’t know the details… and that’s crucial for me. Details are everything. Unfortunately I’ve decided to do this at 10:22pm on Saturday (and type it up the night after… hence the delay in posting), so I’m exhausted and medicated… so I have no idea how coherent I’m gonna be throughout the ep…

Oh yeah… Jack was in hospital and dying in the last ep.

I mean, he didn’t die, but it still broke my heart.

Jack isn’t gonna die. I swear to God, if they introduce this new character and kill him off I’m gonna go ape shit.

Aww!! Look at Sam’s puppy dog face D:

Dean can’t listen to this… I don’t blame him to be honest.

*to Dean* Keep it together, babe.

“What happens next?” - Jack

Yeah, what does happen to a nephilim when they die??

“It’s gonna be an adventure.” - Jack

He’s so optimistic… I find that so weird.

Leave Dean alone, Cas…

Cas’ voice is so raspy… I wonder if that hurts Misha.

“He’s gone.” - Sam

Oh shit… that was fast…

*voice starts shaking* Oh my god… if I didn’t know he comes back I’d be balling my eyes out… but even now I’m getting teary.

You know if Jack never came back from this, they wouldn’t survive the loss.

Where the fuck is Sam going?? What the fuck is Sam going?? Where the fuck is Sam going??

What’s Sam doing?? *sees him sitting on the ground, leaning on the car, and proceeds to gasp out loud* aww, my poor baby, Sam!!

*squeaky half-crying noises* Sam... I just wanna hug- I just wanna hold him.

Tonight, we drink!!

You know a lot of people were complaining about this scene, but after seeing it in its entirety, knowing there’s nougat in the chocolate, like... I know it’s the boys (Jared, Jensen and Misha), but I can still feel that it’s Sam and Dean and Cas.

I wonder if he (Jack) knows he’s dead...

It was the day they were altogether... after Cas came back.

*Jack leaves his heaven* I wonder if he can die... ‘cause he’s part angel... couldn’t he just walk out of heaven??

Oh shit... the Empty is coming after him, ‘cause he’s angel but he’s human, so the Empty is like, ‘dude you gotta come with me’.

There are people talking and it’s not good for Dean’s hangover.

Who the fuck is that??

*Cas introduces her as the chick who tried killing him a little while back* Oh shit... she got old.

“You got old.” - Dean

TWINS!!

“She can read from the translations and maybe we can pull off a miracle.” - Sam

Yeah, no, I can see his logic.

She can’t read it.

Called it.

“Resurrection and a cure... you’re welcome.” - Lily

Seems too easy.

... how are they going to get her into Heaven??

Talk to Billy??

Naomi??

*spends a few minutes trying to remember this ‘God’ they’ve come across before... misses a little bit of the dialogue*

Annnnnd... we’re back in heaven.

That’s Kelly.

That’s his mum... oh my God... IT’S HAPPENING!!

I might cry.

Okay... I’m crying...

Don’t tell her... don’t tell her... don’t tell her *she figures out he’s dead on her own* NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

I don’t like this idea... it’s not a deal with a demon but it’s still a deal...

Wow... the Empty opened all the gates to heaven?? How fucking strong is that thing??

I wonder if it’s older than God?? I can’t remember. All I can really remember is its weird accent...

*watches as Sam moves to leave the room after deal finished with the symbol on the ground* Don’t touch the paint, Sammy, it’s wet.

“Why? Why risk going to Hell when you don’t have to? There’s something you’re not telling us.” - Dean

Good point. Good observations skills, my man!!

Imagine if her daughter wasn’t in Heaven, though... xD

Empty could have cleaned up after itself, bloody hell.

Oh shit, has the Empty killed all the angels?? ‘Cause Heaven really doesn’t need that...

That’s not Duma. I know it’s not thanks to my incapability to ignore spoilers... and now I will continuously yell at my screen, begging Cas to see through the facade and realise IT’S NOT DUMA!!

Fucking Naomi.

“46,750,000,000 human souls will be cast in the wind.” - Naomi

Well... they pulled that number outta their ass.

If that’s how many people are in Heaven... how many are in Hell?? My guess is more... ‘cause people suck.

I wonder where Gods go after they die?? Purgatory??

“The brothers Winchester. I must say, your files have come across my desk many times.” - Anubis

*literally chuckles*

“That's unorthodox. Against protocol.” - Anubi

What do you expect?? You’re dealing with the Winchesters.

I mean, woman, you made your bed... go die in it.

“Try again.” - Empty

I TOLD YOU!!

“He’s our kid!” - Sam

You’re killin’ me!!

“Otherwise, how could you ever, ever let anyone go through what you went through? The pain of losing a kid? Don't do this to us.” - Dean

“Ohh, God, they look scared. Does that hurt you? Good… because I want it to.” - Empty

Man... she looks crazy with those smiles. Holy shit, that actress is good!! I’m impressed!!

*rambles on about The Hart and how it’ll fit in with the ep*

Due to the fact I recorded my reacts with just a voice recorder, I don’t know what was happening but all I said was: Oh Jack... no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

“Take me.” - Cas

What?? Excuse me?? Um... no.

More ‘no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no’-ing.

“I accept.” - Cas

Fuck. Cas. Not a good deal.

So... more secrets... yeah, that’s gonna go down well.

Oh my God, he’s back!!

Lily is gonna die.

Called it.

I wonder if that got her into Heaven... I kinda really hope it did.

It did!! :DThe way Cas is lookin’ around while talking to Naomi... it’s like he’s not sure if she’s her or the Empty xD

“Is, uh, something wrong?“ - Jack

*chuckles* he’s so cute!! I would be all up there, kissin’ his face, being so grateful to have him back!! :)

#supernatural s14 #spn 14 #bamby reacts

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temeraire · 3 years ago

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(1/2) AHHH HELLO!! I have finished network effect!! Ohhh it was SO GOOD SO SO GOOD I need to try to put all my emotional notes into a coherent message now!!

I see what you meant by all the art hints now n I’m still Yelling!! I’m so happy it’s back AHHH!! I was so worried at first when it showed up empty and the reveal that it had been deleted - the fight scene between mb and the infected humans after mb finds that out was CHILLING, and then mb’s breakdown afterwards OHH it rly sees art as a friend I am Upset!! And then when mb managed to bring art back, I felt so immediately reassured, art is so dependable!!! The banter between the two of them AS SOON as art came back im so. AHHHH I love their friendship so much!!! Their arguments rly had me alternating between laughing and clutching my chest in Pain. Art rly brings out mb’s emotional side n it’s so clear that art has come to care for mb so much too!! Ofc neither of them will admit any of this to the other tho :’DDD also their apologies after they came to an understanding… AHHH

And BIG YES to character interactions I love character interactions, it was nice to still have some of the familiar characters in this book n I also loved reading mb interacting with new characters as well!! I especially love amena so much, her playful teasing yet being supportive of mb is so good, I love their friendship :’DDD and it’s rly so cool that the series has both murder mystery type settings like in FT and the fast paced tech action scenes like in this book!! The variety is amazing!!

(2/2) Also the plot of this book was great, I rly enjoyed reading a full length novel of mb n it had everything I loved abt the previous books. It rly made me reflect abt all of mb’s character development :’) the exploitation n dehumanisation of people under capitalism, what happens when we don’t see other people as people, that is explored with mb’s introspections abt its existence n trauma n personhood, and throughout the whole plot w the abandoned colony n corporatisation of planets, while still managing to mix in great action n humour to make it a rly engaging n fun read I’m!! Yelling!! And the ending with mb feeling touched that everyone came to rescue it I am cryin!! It just shows so well that you SHOULD care abt others and it is SO GREAT!! I rly hope there’s gonna be more books, I would love to see more of mb n art!!! Also, ur tag on the post abt recommending media!! :DDDD Thank u for posting abt this series I am SO glad I read it, n also thank u so much for yelling abt it with me!! :’)) Ahh mb is such a great character and a rly fun narrator, what an amazing series!!

YEAAAAAH

ok no believe me the whole series after AC i was Waiting for art to come back and it DID i was so happy and i didnt want to spoil you for that too bad fjhdsfsjhf but YEAH like i knew it wasnt gonna be Dead dead because like... it simply didnt make narrative sense for it to be completely dead, but oh MAN mb's reaction to it thinking art was dead? shattering. devastating. heartwrenching. very delicious in how it shows just how important they are to each other BUUUU ASSHOLE FRIENDS GET ME EVERY TIIIME mb really said

and yeah the banter between them is SO good because like. i think it really reveals things about them both that you dont see in them interacting with humans (or, in mb's case, with other bots)? because they are so singular in who they are and they dont have an absolute overlap but they're both very unique even in the world of constructs. i agree their interactions really do flip flop wildly between delightful rude bickering and punching you to the floor out of NOWHERE. you can see so much of who they are revealed in their interactions with each other in ways that their interactions with the humans don't. they both really genuinely care about each other in a way that is so unique to them (it's pretty funny but also a bit frustrating to see the humans interpret it as an analogue to a romantic relationship, because you can see where they're coming from and it works for humour purposes but also it misses so much of the nuance and the point of how they relate to each other which is that they're both Not human and consider each other as genuine equals and don't have to hold up pretenses of mimicking human behaviour to understand each other or make the other feel comfortable - i saw it somewhere as "my friend who is mentally ill in the same way i am" and it's definitely that, but also i really relate to it as an agender/aroace person and i imagine there's a lot of different ways it Can be interpreted there--anyway i'm rambling lmao) I JUST THINK THAT ART AND MB'S FRIENDHSIP!!!!!!!!

AMENA MY BELOVEEED mb sees a human and says "is anyone going to very grumpily protect this person with their life" and not even wait for an answer. i really love the mini-arc amena gets over the course of the book of coming to understand mb and its place in presaux and its position as a team member and who it is as a person ;-; and also amena herself being both very teenagerish but also incredibly adaptable and competent!! the friendship they develop over this book is really enjoyable i agree :D

YEAAAAAH EXPLORATION OF THEMES WE LOVE THAT!!! martha wells does SUCH a good job of exploring concepts of personhood and portraying mb's trauma as something both very unique and alien but also very very understandable and familiar to a lot of people in a lot of different ways and it's kind of incredible. it really is amazing to go back and reread ASR after this and see just how far mb has come and how much it's changed and grown and how much it's managed to get through and survive ;-; the change in its attitude towards itself (there's a line in NE that makes me Bonkers - "I was a thing before I was a person, if I'm not careful I could become a thing again") from where it started in ASR with grouping itself in with the equipment,,, man. the bit at the end of NE with mb realising that everyone came back to rescue it - something that only one person (mensah) had EVER done before, because mb was DESIGNED to be an expendable resource and these people who care about it said No, we aren't abandoning you, because you're a person and we care about you--MAN!!!!!! IT GETS MEEE

and YEAH the commentary on capitalism and corporate shittiness with how it's both over-the-top nightmarish and horrifically Real,,, man she writes it so well it's so good like you say with the mix of humour and the different kinds of story!! i kinda love that murderbot diaries are for the most part in the form of serial novellas because it really feels like the same kinds of media that mb loves in-universe with its serialised shows, and it allows for so many different kinds of story arcs to happen like murder mysteries and space horror and action thrillers and YEAH it's just so delightful and i really cannot wait for more to come out!! and thank YOU for sending me your delightful reviews and giving me a chance to ramble :DDD if you ever want to ramble some more (on or off anon or just dm me out of the blue!!!!!) PLEASE do i love talking about mb SO MUCH :D

#mb anon i love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#anonymous #ask

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beckytailweaver · 7 years ago

Text

Coco thoughts lately

This is (mostly) in response to @anotherweepingwoman and This Post but also some other things in general I’ve been reading (and you will probably recognize it if you’ve read the same things). It’s separate here because I didn’t want to hijack other people or Great Wall of Text so badly again. XD I’ve tried to be coherent but this will likely drift around a lot! It’s a lot of thoughts all muddled into one space.

(Disclaimer: I only got to see Coco in theater once. For the rest I must resort to vid clips that may or may not decide to load on my slow internet, until I can buy the disc. It's a good exercise in my memory skills.)

Héctor is a liar, but oftentimes he's apologizing for his lies. When I go into my headcanon-framework for his background, these fibs that come out may be old habit from an orphaned childhood. If he was raised, say, in an orphanage by strict caretakers, it would have been to his advantage to know how to put on a good-little-boy face and say whatever was needed to divert attention or stay out of trouble. If he was more of a rangy little street rat type, then white lies would have been a stock part of his survival kit. I think this habit of evading the truth would have worn down a bit once he had a stable home with Imelda (and she would insist on teaching their daughter honesty), but after decades of desperation in the bottom of the afterlife he's definitely back to street rat mode.

Ernesto lies too, and we've seen where that went. I don't think Héctor has ever lied in such a way that was meant to harm anyone. Little fibs to his advantage, a disguise here or a sparkly promise there; never damaging gossip or deliberately hurtful untruths or a promise that could get someone killed. But he is a liar, and anyone who's known him long would know that. (This might also explain why Imelda seems so eager to believe he'd run off and never come home, whether or not Ernesto told her anything. Héctor is slippery and she knows it, but she'd dared to hope he would not be dishonest to her.)

Héctor acts his age, largely, I think because you are sort of frozen the moment you die: You get a skeletal representation of your body at the moment of death, with some decorative additions to give you individuality and mark who you are. Skeletal children don't grow, the old are forever elderly. While the visual/physical form of the body is bones, there has to be some kind of force to animate them, to process what goes on around them. Invisibly, I think, a sort of ghostly/energy echo of the body remains, and part of that is the echo of a brain (how else could they think and remember things?) which for Héctor is an imprint of a 21-year-old brain with its not-quite-complete neurological maturity. While he can learn and gain experiences, the structure of that brain is still going to process things in a 21-year-old way. Experience can shape his thinking and grant him wisdom, but at his root he's still young in personality. (Young people can be tired, cynical, and hopeless too.)

Héctor is a father, but he has never been a parent to a child older than 3-4. (Young parents grow with their first kids and learn things!) "Rubbing shoulders" with Miguel may just be the only way he knows how to interact with young boys older than his daughter was. He does seem to be comfortable around kids and isn't flustered by dealing with them, which makes me think he was around a lot of them growing up (orphanage?) or ended up being That Kid in their small town who is all the children's favorite bro. He is the fun, gentle sort of person that children flock to, so it's likely he would sing and play with the neighborhood kids even up into his marriage. He seems pretty active and playful himself (when not desperate or on the clock, but you still see flashes of it), despite the crippling of being Forgotten.

Miguel wasn't mimicking Héctor to mock him, but because he wanted to walk "like a skeleton" and his nearest, dearest example happened to have the Forgotten condition of loose bones and an awkward limp. Miguel will imitate his new cool big bro! But in this case, Héctor is so used to being mercilessly ridiculed for everything that he takes it poorly on reflex, without realizing (perhaps not until he stops and thinks about it later) that Miguel meant nothing bad by it. The shove in response isn't really that severe for the horseplay that young boys can get up to. (It wasn't a punch or a slap or a kick or a grab, which angry men are certainly capable of.) But it is reactive in a somewhat immature way, same as his snappish responses to the musicians later on.

He let out that grouchy "how come he didn't invite you?" comeback to Miguel in the rehearsal area, but Miguel wasn't hurt or upset by it. Kid didn't even blink. (It was a pretty legitimate question from Miguel, even!) But I think the subconscious drift into familial familiarity made it more like the kind of snark Miguel gets at home all the time and he doesn't even pause. It's Rivera snark, it just happens, nobody's really injured by it, on to the next subject. They may use it to cover up their soft spots, and they all know how to take it as well as dish it out. Miguel had the proper Rivera response as well: Let it go. He didn't keep digging in or teasing on this. He might react with disbelief to some of Héctor's statements about knowing a famous guy like De la Cruz, but that's because he's already recognized Héctor as a consummate embellisher and knows better than to believe every word from his mouth. He never uses the lack of party invitation as a weapon or even brings it up again.

Héctor's poor actions as an "adult and disciplinarian" after Poco Loco can be attributed to, yes, his mental youth, and also I think to those edges of desperation that crop up many, many times all night long. That desperation, knowing that tonight is probably his last, is a poor help to an already-impulsive young man's mind. It makes his Ready-Fire-Aim even worse. It short circuits a century's worth of wisdom and (after)life experience in favor of urgent, sometimes thoughtless rushing. Yes, he is very deeply concerned with himself and his photo right now; he can't help it. He's dying and he's desperate and he needs to do this now, and however much he likes Miguel this dumb kid is on a clock too and doesn't even know what's important here! Despite that he's usually a nice guy I definitely don't think Héctor is a total pushover in personality. That whole night prior to the cenote we're probably looking at the shortest his fuse has ever been. And he still manages to be in general kind and supportive to Miguel (who has been alternately delighting him and giving him hell all evening).

I have a somewhat different headcanon about Héctor watching Miguel's slow fading to bone over the course of the night. I think Miguel did discuss his time limit with Héctor during or just before the face painting early on, but initially Héctor is understandably more concerned with his own deadline. As he comes to know Miguel better, he cares more. But he also may forget now and then, in his own urgent situation, until a look over the kid's shoulder reminds him that two hourglasses are trickling down, not one. And he does care, potentially a great deal: "Your life literally depends on you winning!" He didn't even mention the photo until after, when the family thing came up.

Genuine Héctor...definitely makes numerous appearances through the night. Most of his performance-art is for guards and gatekeepers, wheedling to people he needs to get past who might cut him some slack. Héctor being all super extra nice to Miguel during the face paint and explanation is definitely performance. He does a lot of performance with the Shantytown Crew, putting on a happy-go-lucky face. His Frida impersonations are absolutely performance, quite deliberately so!

However, Genuine Héctor comes out surprisingly fast around Miguel. The kid worms his way into a position of camaraderie pretty darn quick. Perhaps this is due to Héctor's loneliness making him open to someone who could be a real friend, or maybe it's genetic similarity gently drawing them to trust more easily. Most of the Genuine Héctor moments are in Miguel's proximity, possibly not only because the kid is the other leading character of the film; a lot of his genuine moments aren't just in proximity to Miguel, but in response to him.

Genuine Héctor generally doesn't come with the overbearing grins, theatrical body actions, or higher, wheedly tone of voice. Genuine Héctor is in the casual questions, exasperated eye-rolls, short-tempered grumps, dramatic sighs, epic grouchface, snappy comebacks, freely teasing, warm encouragement, playful dance teaching, melancholy stillness, angry desperation, grieving rage, tearful hopelessness, clear relief. Those moments when Héctor is not keenly watching the people around him as targets he needs to con. (There's a difference in his gaze; keep your eye on it!)

Not all of his performance is negative or self-serving, either; sometimes it's just because a nervous kid needs a pick-me-up and Héctor can put on a smile for that.

Face painting scene—lots of performance, but some real warmth. Walking with Miguel, the shove—no performance, pure grumpy. Talking to Ceci—plenty of performance for deference, Ceci is a gatekeeper. Rehearsal studio—mostly genuine; no point in faking the musicians, they treat him like crap no matter what he does. Going down to Shantytown—performance, especially off the ledge! With Chicharron—started as performance, became genuine real fast. Trolley to the plaza—performance to get around truthtelling, but also to act encouraging. Waiting for a turn onstage—no performance until okayokayokay and he goes into another encouraging spiel.

Some of Héctor's best genuine moments are on the Poco Loco stage. Sure, he's performing, but that's genuine Héctor, not a performance. Not during the song. He's not watching the audience—he's watching Miguel. And then he's playing with him. There's no con in that music. That was all Héctor and Miguel having fun with each other.

Afterward, the argument...no performance. None. It's all very real exasperation and anger fueled by the same old desperation. The argument hurts both of them because it tastes like betrayal. ("I told you I needed to cross tonight!" "Well I told you it has to be De la Cruz!") They both pulled lies on each other (taste of your own medicine!) and ran face-first into a mirror. Shortsighted demands and lack of explanation, and the whole thing goes down the drain.

As a kind person, we never see Héctor use force to get across the bridge. He did not grab or physically coerce Miguel in any way to take his picture there; he used only words. Even when things came to a head and he was angrily trying to drag the kid back to his family, it was half-hearted at best (and no more than we've seen anyone in the Rivera family do with recalcitrant children) and Miguel slipped out of his grip in a heartbeat. (Maybe he's getting too weak to hold on; maybe Miguel is too heavy for him to drag without lifting.) I'd bet money that Héctor has never threatened physical injury or actively harmed anyone in his pursuit of crossing; that he's never used a weapon or taken anyone hostage to try to force his way across. I doubt such things would even occur to him! His entanglements with the crossing guards have all likely been evasions and brief tangles where he's trying to disengage. I'd wager that night that Ernesto is the first person he's actually attacked with intent to harm in a very, very long time—if ever.

One of the saddest things is how Héctor has been denied musical joy for so long. "Stupid musical fantasy" is mainly because his turned out to be. He's also lost perspective on this: To a child, these things are huge. Like, music is everything. Miguel has his family, but they're...in a way, background, they've always been there, and in his mind always will be. He doesn't want to leave them for music, he wants to find a way back to them with music on his own terms. Family should support you, but Riveras have made music into an all or nothing deal. (What would they have done, if the LoD journey hadn’t happened, if truth hadn't come out and Miguel refused to give up music? Would they have disowned him or otherwise banished him?)

Héctor likely had little or no family before the one he made for himself, and going back to them would not have meant giving up music altogether. I think at the point of their argument, Héctor failed to realize (or had not been informed of) the position Miguel is in. Héctor was giving up a fond dream of musical fame to go back to his small town family and find a local job he could do while continuing to play music for recreation and additional income. It's really not the same as Miguel going back to (or being forced by curse conditions) an existence centered around a shoemaking family defined by its enforced silencing of music. In that sense, Héctor was giving up fame and money (Ernesto's priorities), not music; Miguel would be losing music entirely, for the fame and money afforded by the Rivera shoe reputation.

It puts a different spin on their respective stories to think of it that way. They both love their families and giving them up permanently isn't even part of the equation. The real culprits/sacrifices here are wealth/reputation and music. And before we get into "But Héctor left his family!" let's just pause: Héctor did not abandon his family, he went on a business trip! He fully intended to return, and the fact that he didn't—sooner or later—is entirely due to Ernesto's choices. It's incredibly sad that Ernesto decided to kill him, and equally as sad that Imelda was so eager/willing to believe that he would abandon them. Poor guy just can't catch a break at any point in his life (or afterlife).

As a somewhat related postscript: I think it's a bit funny that people like to bring this up, since "Go for your dreams!" is a big motif in modern (especially American) society. We're pretty much expected to leave our families behind to achieve what we want. Big education, big job, big house, the spouse we desire, the city we want to live in, the generation gap we can't abide...basically the whole point (so far as I was told) is to grow up, move out, leave the old folks behind (call a few times a year, and visit on some holidays), and achieve our dreams no matter what.

What Héctor was doing—going on a business trip for a job or potential job—is absolutely nothing unusual to what goes on every day: People with spouses and children temporarily leave them to go on business trips, they go on military tour, they go on band/performance tours, they commute or move to another city for half the year for work...and this is considered normal. Not ideal, but pretty normal. (Even when Héctor was alive, people would at times have to go far away to make money to send to their families.) Maybe it wasn't favored in Héctor's time either, but I find it rather ironic that people give him hell over it now!

#rambled on way too long with this #so there's a cut to save your dash #random coco thoughts because #And maybe just a LITTLE social commentary #I apologize for that #And I'll get back to writing fic now #well mostly #I hope #coco spoilers #coco headcanon #coco analysis

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siranghae · 7 years ago

Text

Punishment (m)

Word count: 4,881

Content: Jungkook smut - blowjob, fingering, hair pulling, ass slapping, dom!Kook, cop AU

A/N: I know this took a looong time to post since I've been busy with school and work (which is just delightful... ugh) but I hope this scenario makes that up for you. After all, it's over 50% smut for once because GOD DO I HAVE A THINK FOR KOOKIE AS A COP. I'M WEAK OKAY?? Sorry.

When it comes to getting pulled over, you might have the worst luck in the world. After all, is there anyone else who has had to flirt their way out of a ticket three times in one month? For some reason, you just happened to be that unlucky. You could be in the Guinness World Records.

And as if it couldn’t get any worse, it’s the same cop every time.

He had dark hair that always looked like he’d just brushed his fingers through it - messy yet stylish in a way - with a few strands falling down his forehead. Eyes like those of a fox, clever and arrogant. That same attitude he showed in his posture, too, always pushing his chest forward so you could clearly see that he exercised frequently.

Jeon Jungkook, is what he introduced himself as every time.

“Yes, I know that,” you said that third time, forcing a smile.

He was leaning against your car, his face only a few inches away from yours and robbed you of any personal space. His smile was that of a boy that had always gotten what he wanted and was now expecting the world to bow down for him. “So you can remember my name but can’t remember traffic rules?” He asked, winking teasingly. He’d said the same thing last time, too, though he didn’t seem to care. Or maybe he’d forgotten.

You giggled exaggeratedly, almost making yourself throw up from the cutesy attitude. “Sorry, mister~” you put emphasis on the last word, stretching the last syllable out as much as possible. The moment you’d laid eyes on him, it had become apparent what kind of girls he’d like: the overly girly ones, sugarcoating everything like they were in a tv drama.

He clicked his tongue. “How is it that I keep running into you? It’s almost as if you’re doing it on purpose.” As he said it, his fox eyes moved down, stopping right where the decollete of your tight red dress started. It was as though you’d sensed you’d meet again that morning, picking the dress instinctively that morning without thinking about it twice. It was a good pick, you realised now: he was basically eating you up alive.

His gaze snapped back to your face when you giggled again. With a dirty smirk, he leaned even closer, basically leaning in through your window at this point. You could kiss him if he got two inches closer. “Who knows? Maybe I want you to teach me the rules.” you did your best to wink suggestively, though you hoped he wouldn’t actually take you up on that offer.

Yes, he was your type. Every angle of his face was perfect, like he’d been shaped to be divine, every smirk he smiled was so tempting that you could already imagine kissing him just to stop him from teasing you. Every inch of your body said yes, would gladly do anything his eyes asked you to do - but despite that, your mind said no. With good reason. His arrogance was overwhelming, his words filled with self-praise and pride. He knew how hot he was, too, which pissed you off more than anything else. Any other guy like this would have turned you off immediately. You wouldn’t have tried to flirt your way out of a speeding ticket if he’d looked even slightly different. And yet, here you were, wondering what had driven you to this point.

“Oh, do you? Hm… I’m not sure,” he said, pretending to think hard about what he’d decide. “Punishing you sounds good too. After all, you’ve been a very, very bad girl.”

You almost burst out laughing at his attempt at flirting with you. Of course, he wasn’t aware of it, looking as though he’d just said the best thing in the world. He was so cocky for someone that wasn’t able to woo you with his words in the slightest. The last time you’d slept with a guy like him, he’d been unbearable before and after. Always talking about himself, his job, his friends, his past and his future like he was infatuated with himself. This cop, though he was much younger, could’ve been his brother. It amused you that people could be this full of themselves.

Looking at your dashboard, you noticed it was almost 7 pm. You were on your way to your parents’ place, though you’d left too late as usual. Getting pulled over by him the other times might not have been as bad - this time, you weren’t that patient. You breathed in slowly before putting on a overly sweet smile again. “Oh, please, mister, I’m not that bad, am I? Could you not let me off with a warning?” You leaned forward, knowing he’d look down again.

You were right. He licked his lips, his eyes hungrier than before. You knew what he was thinking, as his perverted gaze was basically spelling it out for you. “Are you in a hurry or something?”

Nodding eagerly, you explained to him that you were going to see your parents. Why you told him where you were going, you didn’t know. Perhaps it would convince him to let you go.

He chuckled, and from his gaze you could tell he had a hard time concentrating on what you said. “Is that so? Hm… I’m not sure if I believe a girl like you.”

“W-why not?” you said, smiling at the last second.

“Don’t you think I’ve noticed?” He suddenly stepped back from the car. Then, he strained a smile. “‘Mister, mister, I’m soooo sorry for driving too fast! Can’t you let me off with a warning?’” His voice was higher-pitched, sounding almost cutesy. Every word was accompanied by him sticking out his chest even more. Everything about his acting was strange, almost laughable - until you realised he was pretending to be you. “You look like this and you think you need to put on some kind of act for me? Fuck, do you think I’m that ignorant?”

You stuttered, nothing coherent coming out of your mouth. When he realised you wouldn’t respond, he continued. “I was going along with it, but honestly, it isn’t really working for you. Don’t worry, I won’t be keeping you here much longer. Just let me fine you real quick, and-”

“No!” You gasped. “Please don’t.” No way in hell were you going to let your parents discover that you’d broken the rules. They knew you to be so proper, never doing anything that was against the law - even the smallest wrongdoing would send them into shock. Moreover, you weren’t rolling in money. You knew getting fined like this would have consequences.

He raised an eyebrow. “Ah, so that’s your real personality? Look, missy, that’s just how it goes. You break the rules, I punish you. No matter how attractive you might be, or how cutesy you act, rules are rules.”

“Please, o-officer. I’ll do anything. Anything.” You grabbed his hand, noticing that he was turning away from you before you’d even finished your plea.

The cop turned his head into your direction, looking skeptical. “Anything?”

You cleared your throat, putting up a more sensual voice. “Anything for you… oppa.” It was a bold move, you knew that, but it was the only thing you could think of in that moment. Guys loved it when you called them that. You knew how much control you had over them, knew that just that one word could make them forget everything.

Not him.

“What did you just say?” Suddenly, his face was right next to yours. His breath was in your neck, sending shivers down your spine. You gasped, which only made him inch closer to you. “What, huh?”

You didn’t dare move an inch, scared of what he would do if you did. His eyes that had resembled a foxes before now were more like those of a tiger - hungry, angry, violent. The arrogance was gone and had made place for raw emotions - those of an animal that was about to grab its prey. And that prey was you. “Oppa? Oppa? Did you just call me your oppa?” He pulled his hand away, letting yours crash down.

You didn’t know how to respond without making him more angry. You looked at him in utter silence, holding your breath until your throat ached. His jaw looked razorsharp, like it could cut right through you if he turned his head ever so slightly. With one finger you reached out - scared yet so curious that you couldn’t restrain the urge to touch it.

He shook his head with short, aggressive twitches, making you pull your finger back. You’d never seen someone get so angry over something as trivial as this, shaking like he’d just been told you had ruined his life. “Nobody calls me their oppa, you got that?” The lines between his brows were so deep that you thought they’d become permanent. He clenched his jaw, letting out a groan of frustration that got louder and louder until he finally growled a sentence. “Mister Jeon, is that fucking clear?”

“Y-yes, opp-” You bit down on your lip with such force that it got numb after a second. He raised an eyebrow, inching closer to you. By the time he stopped, you could almost feel his lips against yours. The only thing you had to do was tilt your head forward, and you’d taste him. “...Mister Jeon.”

He nodded. “That’s a good girl.” He stepped back, abruptly ending your thoughts of kissing him. “God, if you hadn’t said that…”

“What then?” You asked, leaning forward.

His eyes locked on to yours, narrowing with distrust. “We’re going to be nosey now? First, you go and call me oppa, and now this… You think you can afford to act this way?” He chuckled, shaking his head again. “A girl as attractive as you in a tight dress like that… fuck, you must’ve done this before.”

“N-no, never!” You exclaimed, reaching out for his hand again. “This is the first time, I swear.”

“Don’t lie to me,” he growled. When he noticed your hand, he laughed. “I bet you’ve bent down with that pretty little ass of yours many times. You know what you’re doing. Dudes must love you and this act of yours. I can’t blame them for that.”

You opened your mouth, but no sound come out. You didn’t know if what he was saying was true, but looking into his eyes you knew he meant it. His eyes followed your curves down again, but this time you could only guess what he was imagining. He swallowed, clearly not in control of his thoughts anymore. “Get out of the car.”

His voice was so demanding that you barely dared to make him wait. You fumbled with your seatbelt, trying to unfasten it as quickly as possible, yet that somehow ended up making it much harder to do. Panicking, you looked up at him. “I-”

He flung the car door open, sighing. “Fuck, I’ll do it for you if it’s going to take this long.” He leaned in, his head almost against your breasts, his fingers creeping up your dress to your belt. You bit your lip. His fingers were long and elegant, and even just this gentle touch made you slam your thighs shut so you’d not notice the warm pleasure between your legs. Two seconds later, it was over. He stepped back, looking impatiently at you. You swallowed, rubbing your thighs together to relieve yourself of some of the tension. Never had a guy been able to make you feel this worked up, let alone a guy that looked like he was about to snap your neck in half. As slowly as you could, you put your feet on the pavement next to your car, hoping to postpone whatever was waiting for you. Gathering all the courage you had, you whispered: “What are you going to do to me?” You were standing next to him now, finally noticing how much taller the boy seemed now that you were seeing him on eye level.

“Punish you, of course.”

His hands were on your waist, spinning your around so that you were facing the car. He placed you against the side of the car harshly. You gasped when you felt him press his lower body against your ass, feeling his erection for the first time. It was already so hard, sliding up and down against the curve in your dress smoothly. His fingers reached down, moving up the fabric until your butt was only covered by a thin layer of underwear. It was cold outside, yet you barely took note of it. Instinctively, you spread your legs further, arching your ass his way.

“Oppa~” you mumbled, closing your eyes.

His hand hit your left cheek only milliseconds after you’ve uttered it. You gasped out of surprise, your mouth pressing against the freezing metal of your car’s frame. “Wrong,” he said, sounding like a teacher reprimanding a pupil. Before he let you correct yourself, he rubbed his cock against you again, sending a wave of pleasure through to your head. The friction made your thoughts foggy, every little distraction abruptly making you forget what you were thinking about. You uttered a coo when he stopped moving, rubbing your ass against him instead.

“You like that, baby?” he groaned, fingers pressing into your waist so hard that they’d leave bruises.

“Fuck, yes~” you whined, turning your head so you could see him. “More…”

The second slap was harder, making you let out a strangled moan that was cut off by a third one. He grabbed you by your hair, pulling your head closer to his. “You know how hard this was for me? I can’t believe I held myself back until now.”

You snapped back to reality for a brief moment. “Wait, you mean…?”

“What, you thought I just now happened to realise this? ‘Huh, she’s giving me a boner, I wonder why’?” He laughed, pushing himself even closer to you. “I’ve wanted to do this to you the second I saw you. But I told myself that I couldn’t. Fuck, I wanted to touch myself so bad this whole month, you don’t even know. You didn’t make this easy for me. Every night, I imagined you on your knees with that little mouth around my dick. I don’t even remember how I stopped myself from jerking off to that thought.” He growled, his hand pulling your hair until your lips touch. It’s a raw, first kiss, much more eager than any of the kisses you’ve had before with other guys but also much more messy. His teeth bit into your lower lip, brushed against your tongue - it was rough, yet it felt incredible to have a man long this much for you. After a mere minute, he jerked his head away.

“Get on your knees,” he sneered, letting your body collapse against the car when he let go of your waist. You nodded, slowly getting down to your knees with the curve of the car against your back. Your heart raced, beating so fast it could've driven you to a heart attack. You had to admit to yourself that you were excited about this now that you were eye to eye with his crotch, noticing how big the bulge in his pants truly was. You wondered what he would feel like inside of your mouth, if he'd even fit, as your fingers inched closer and closer towards his pants.

His hand was on your head, and he petted you kindly as to reward you for obeying his demands. He tried to be aggressive with you, yet you could see that it was really the impatience of a horny young boy who was getting a blowjob. You smiled at that thought as you curled your fingers around the top of his pants.

“You're so eager, babe,” he said, noticing that smile and misinterpreting it as excitement about what was going to happen. “Have you never done this before after all?” He chuckled huskily, his fingers lowering themselves into your nape. “Am I your first?”

You yanked down his pants at that moment, revealing his cock that was standing up straight. Looking up at him, you licked your lips teasingly. “You'll see.”

And with that, you put your mouth on his tip.

“Fuc-ck..” he growled, his fingers wrapping around your hair and pulling your head away from his part. Every inch of his face screamed pain mixed with lust. With his free hand, he slowly started jerking his cock up and down. A moan escaped his lips right before he bit into the lower one roughly. You could tell that he'd been holding back now. Every little stroke made him grunt, thrusting his hips forward so that your mouth was almost on him again. You observed him for a moment, wondering when he'd tell you to do it again, yet it seemed like he was too busy to say a single phrase. After one hard stroke, his eyes rolled back in his head and he let go, too weak to continue pleasuring himself. He was irresistible in that moment, his cock looking so smooth and thick that you couldn't help but repeat your action from before. When you touched the sensitive skin, your gaze found his. He smirked, trying to seem composed. “That's a good girl.”

You stuck your tongue out, licking his tip faster than you usually did. He moaned again, thrusting his hips forward so that his cock went into your mouth. It was sloppy, your teeth scraping him as it entered, yet he didn't seem to mind. With one hand, you grabbed his member by its base, as the other pulled down his pants further to reveal his legs. It was obvious that he worked out - his thighs were accentuated, like those of a dancer. You caressed the left side, feeling the strong muscles twitch with every touch.

“You look so hot on your knees, baby,” he cooed, his hand pulling your hair back so that your mouth would create friction on him. He yelped when you put him deeper in your mouth, punishing him for pulling your hair too hard. You continued until his tip hit the back of your mouth. It hurt, making it so hard to stay like this, yet you managed to pull yourself together and look him in the eyes for a moment as you deepthroated him. There were tears in your own eyes, as your gag reflex was not happy about this course of action. Jungkook, on the other hand, slumped forward with his upper body, his hand grabbing the open door to support him. “Damn,” he moaned, closing his eyes. “Your mouth feels so good… it's so fucking wet-” He moaned again when you slowly pulled your mouth off of his dick. The taste of precum was in your mouth, making you feel a hot burning sensation between your legs.

“You're really good at this, baby girl.” He put his hand on your head again, slowly digging into your hair. You knew your looked messy after that, though you'd only blown him once. Somehow, that made him look at you even more longingly. “Do it again.”

You nodded, wrapping your hand around him once more before blowing him. You made sure not to do it too quickly, your movements predictable and merciful, yet you could see that the man wasn't going to be lasting much longer. His hands weakly held on to your hair, and with every rhythmic thrust of his pelvis he pulled it back a little, making sure you wouldn't choke. Every time you squeezed it,he'd shiver with pleasure and moan delightfully. His cock was so warm and nice in your mouth that you wanted to keep going - pleasuring the man with your soft lips until he came more heavily than he ever had. But before you got the chance to do that, right when he was about to orgasm, he pulled your hair back with such strength that your head slammed against the car frame.

His breathing was short and quick, mixed with loud groans that showed how close he'd been to cumming. “S-sorry…” he moaned, his voice cracking at the end. He wasn't able to say more than that when he was out of breath, needing every bit of oxygen so he wouldn't collapse against you.

“It's okay,” you mumbled, brushing your hair back as best as you could. Your lips were swollen, and when you licked them you tasted from of his precum. That action made him growl like he was in incredible pain from not letting you finish it off. His erection looked painful, still sticking up nearly vertically,making you feel bad for him.

“Oppa-” you bit your lip, but you knew it's too late to take it back. Despite how weak your blowjob had made him, Jungkook’s eyes turned into flames before he completely lost his temper. You shrieked when he grabbed your wrists, pulling you up against the car until you were standing up straight - then, he lifted you up by your knees, wrapping your legs around his waist. Your wetness pressed right up against his clothed stomach, seeping through your underwear and his shirt, making him notice how turned on you were for the first time. You averted your eyes when you noticed his grin, amused and teasing. “God, you're so wet. I bet I'll slide into you just like that. Fuck, I can't wait.”

With surprising ease, he managed to pull down your panties without letting you fall. You gasped, feeling one of his long fingers rub against your entrance and making the tension there increase by tenfold. He licked his lips, seeing you enjoy it so much. “You like it rough, right?”

“W-what? No…” the sweet girl in you couldn't help but deny it, shaking your head like your life depended on it.

Jungkook realised something, chuckling when he sees you blush.

“I have to punish you for lying, babe,” he said, his finger going inside of you. It went in so smooth and deep that you gasped in surprise when he hit your spot so quickly. You grinded your hips against him to relieve the tension of him inside you, spreading your legs further in the process to make it easier for him to move. “God, you feel so fucking tight. I can't wait much longer.”

“Please, Jungkook…” you whined, tightening yourself around his finger even more. “Please…”

“What, babe?”

You moaned.

“Say it.”

You closed your eyes. “I want you to fuck me, Jungkook! ”

You didn't have to tell him twice.

His hand moved your ass up against the metal, positioning you in a way that would make it easy for him to slide into you. “That’s my baby girl,” he muttered into your ear, his voice sounding so different that it scared you. It was lower, huskier, much more intense. You knew you’d reached a point from which there was no return. His lips kissed your jawline, your impatience getting stronger and stronger.

“Don’t make me wait, Jungkook~” you whined, turning your head away from his.

“Getting impatient, are we?” You felt his hand cup your ass, squeezing it harshly. “You deserve to be punished for being such a tease. Maybe I’ll let you wait for a whole month, too?”

“N-no!” You yelled, louder than you wanted to. You wrapped your arms around his neck desperately, begging him not to make you wait. Had he changed his mind? “Don’t do this to me.”

“I thought you didn’t want this?” He tilted his head to the side. “You seemed in such a hurry before you conveniently gave in to me. Maybe I should fine you after all…”

You panicked, not knowing what to do to distract him from that thought - or to prove him wrong. Finally, you tightened the embrace, pushing him towards you with your legs until his tip was against your entrance? (I don’t really know what you meant) “Anything but that. Please, Jungkook. I want you.”

“Really?” He licked his lips, teasingly thrusting his member up so that it entered you by less than an inch. You choked, feeling the way he stretched you with barely anything. “Hm, I don’t know.”

You looked at him. His arrogant smile was back - he was just messing around now. No mattered how many times you begged, you could see that he wasn’t going to give in. But what were you supposed to do then? You didn’t want to wait any longer - and you knew he was only doing this to make you go crazy. He wouldn’t be able to stay patient forever. How long would he make you wait, though?

In that moment, you realised something - you knew what he wanted you to do. He wanted you to say it, loudly and clearly, so he could punish you with good reason.

You bit your lip and put on the same face as you had before he’d shown his true side. Lips pouting, eyes staring into his flirtily, hands caressing his nape. Then, you said the words he wanted to hear, putting on the cutesiest voice you could do.

“Oppa~” you cried. “Why are you making me wait?”

He growled. “What was that?”

You made a confused sound. “Huhhh? What is it, oppa?”

His eyes went blank, the only way to tell what that word was doing to him being the right corner of his mouth that twitched nervously. “Don’t you dare.”

“What do you mean, op-”

You didn’t get to finish your sentence. Jungkook entered you so roughly that you cried out in pain, your body unable to adapt to him this quickly. Even he couldn’t contain himself any longer, moaning loudly when he felt your walls so tightly around him. “F-fuck…” Was all he said before you stopped him from talking by moving your hips teasingly. He yelped, his face scrunching up from the immense amount of pleasure that waved through his body. “Slow down!”

You didn’t listen, tightening your walls around him even more. His eyes rolled into his head, his legs almost collapsing from what you were doing to him. “Why, oppa?”

“You fucking brat,” he groaned. “I’ll show you.”

“Sure,” you laughed - regretting it immediately.

His fingers pressed into your ass, their nails digging into the delicate skin. You hummed in approval, the pain feeling more like pleasure after a second. He smiled devilishly - he was up to something. Two seconds later you realised what that something was. He rolled his hips into you - once, twice, again and again. He lifted your leg up to create a better angle for him to thrust into you, giving you the time you needed to take revenge by moving your hips around.

“Stop fucking moving!” He cried, a deep frown etched into his face. You dug your fingers into his shoulders, giggling softly at your sweet revenge. When he noticed, his eyes were filled with rage. “You’re not taking this seriously enough, babe. And you know what that means.”

With one rough thrust, he sent shivers down your spine that felt like a bolt of lightning. Before you knew it, he was pulling down your dress until one breast was visible, his eyes hungrily taking up what he saw. He placed his mouth on your nipple at the same time, his tongue teasing the soft skin with slow, calculated movements. You moaned from the pit of your stomach, feeling every inch of your body loose feeling except where he was touching you. Every time his hips crashed into you was heaven and hell at the same time, driving you to the edge much too quickly yet also just in time. His wet, warm tongue against your sensitive skin, his hand against your ass and the friction of his dick inside of you - all of this was culminating in the biggest orgasm you'd experienced in a long time. With your last willpower, you managed to say his name - his hips thrusting into you until he was filling you up completely one last time before you came.

When you finally regained your senses after a minute of having to force yourself to breathe in and out, so overwhelmed by what had happened that you barely had noticed that Jungkook came at the exact same moment as you, you looked at the man collapsed next to you once more. Your legs were freezing, yet it wasn't that bad after your bodies had collided.

“That was so fucking good,” you heard Jungkook mutter, pulling out with a sigh. “God, you're good.”

You stroked his hair absentmindedly, agreeing with him through this. “Is that right… oppa?”

He looked up, raising one eyebrow at you. “You haven't learned, have you? It's Mister Jeon to you.”

“Sure it is, Jungkook.”

From the look in his eyes, you could tell that he didn't care anymore.

“Maybe I'll have to punish you again sometime soon.”

You laughed. “I'll make sure to drive too fast again, then.”

“Good, because I can't wait to do this again.”

You couldn't, either.

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blueraith · 6 years ago

Text

Some folks still need to learn how to constructively comment

Wish I could say that I’ve been writing Chapter... 12(? Legit, I don’t often remember the chapter numbers outside of the Google doc) since posting Chapter 11 (we’re just gonna assume I know where the fuck I’m at in my own story, okay? Give me this).

But that would be a bald faced lie.

(Mostly because of my sister’s graduation and all the family visiting and the concurrent back injury I was suffering. Really kills the writing mood when you can’t sit up properly to type.)

This is going under a read more, because this incident Vexed Me To The Max(TM) and triggered a Rant of Epic Proportions(TM).

But graduation has been over, and my back has been feeling great. What really kept me a bit down since all that was over and done with is that very morning I’m feeling better, I see that I have two comments on the 100 fic I’ve put on indefinite hiatus. Yeah, it’s not an active story, but I still care about it, and I’ve been thinking about it recently. So, in short. I still care about it a hell of a lot. Hell, I care about everything that I write. I’ve written fanfiction at what’s nearing 10 years now, but nothing has erased the fact that putting yourself out there in the public eye takes a hell of a lot of effort and, sure, a smidgen of courage and confidence.

Well, this lovely commenter told me that my word count was way too high, that I was slowing my story down, and that they skipped to the last chapter (from Chapter 2, they skipped 6 chapters of ongoing character development, an ensemble cast, Ark politics, and canon fix-its) “40k words and [Clarke’s] still not on the ground yet??”

This is me paraphrasing both comments. I deleted them with extreme prejudice from the fic because I wasn’t leaving that kind of useless bullshit on my work after it effectively ruined my mood for, like, four days.

Why was it bullshit? Well, for one thing taking the average word count per chapter, it’s only a little over 5k words per chapter. Look. I balance out my word counts very carefully for each story that I write. This fic has a longer than average word count compared to my more recent stuff (which is around 4k per chapter) because of all the fuckin shit I was pulling off in this particular fic. Reworking canon to better explain why the Arkers were resistent to the radiation on the ground while having the superior blood that the Mountain Men wanted without putting them up in their shitty space station for thousand of years that evolution would have actually required them to have gone through to be remotely realistic.

Jake’s alive in this fic because I don’t like dead characters shaping character development on a pre-canon basis. Personally, I dislike orphan/parental loss storylines before the specific original work has even started. I get that orphans exist in real life. But YA media has a disproportionate amount of dead parents. Eh. I wanted to do something different. So, this means there’s an entire extra character in the story that I have to write and develop.

Diana Allers actually matters in day to day Ark life instead of just showing up and nearly murdering everyone because she’s a selfish bitch for little to no reason other than to make Abby’s already pretty damn full storyline even more packed than it already was. (Seriously, why didn’t they develop Allers more? She’s lazily implemented in canon, and I hate it. Lord only knows I enjoyed Abby and Raven’s plotlines far more in several places of Season 1 rather than Bellamy’s Manpain Adventures Lite Before He Turns Into A Complete And Utter Psychopath Later On In The Series).

Jaha is far more competent and slimey than he is in the show, rather than being a foolish man who is barely toddering along in the plot towards something useful.

Abby and Jake are at odds because Jake technically betrays Clarke and allows her to get arrested in the beginning of the story. They adopt Raven in the interim and they’re all awkwardly trying to free Clarke while pretending that Jake and Abby aren’t having marital problems. Well, Jake and Abby are pretending, Raven is as blunt as she usually is and just calls shit like she sees it.

Ensemble cast. There’s literally a tag on this story that tells you all that “This Story Is Literally About Everyone.”

So.

Yeah.

Clarke’s not on the fucking ground yet. But you wouldn’t know that, would you? Having skipped past 6 chapters.

Is 5k really that long? I wouldn’t know, personally when I read a longfic, I go into it knowing that the chapters might be long as fuck because I know that I’m reading a fic that could literally take me through several days and I read pretty damn fast. Not that 40k words is really all that much when you’re rewriting a TV show using all the characters who already exist in canon and then getting into their thoughts and motivations because that is literally what books do, this isn’t a screenplay, I wouldn’t be caught dead writing one because I despise them. Sorry, but you’re getting the full range of thoughts and emotions of everyone involved. I know, that’s just awful, getting hours and hours of content for free, but god forbid the plot doesn’t run on your timetable.

But that’s really the crux of this rant, isn’t it? NEVER complain about word counts, people. Too short? Who the fuck cares? The author could be just beginning their writing careers, so to speak. Word counts of any significance takes practice, first of all. So, not only could they might or might not have the required experience to write longer chapters, they may not even want to. And that’s fine. Because they do this FOR FREE.

Same thing with longer chapters. Are you really going to come at me, nearly a year after I’ve written and posted this work, complaining about word count, as though there’s even a remote chance that I’m going to go back and edit down all of that time and effort I put into that work to satisfy your fragile reading stamina?

Pfffffffffft.

I mean, this is funny to me in some regard because I’m over here wondering just what would be a good length for this person. Part of the reason my chapters tend to be at least 4k words long is because that’s generally where I can get a comfortable amount of character interaction, introspective thought, and plot moving forward. All three of those things matter to me when writing chapters. I hate reading too short works (and no, I don’t tell these authors this. I read what they give me and just deal with it because they’re entertaining me for free) and it’s little more than characters just trading dialogue with each other. I want to know what they are thinking about as well. I want a bit of narration. I’m reading something from a specific character’s point of view, and I want that chapter to ooze the personality of that character.

These are all the things I keep in mind when I write to my word count goals, personally. Doing it in less than 3k words might be possible, but it would sure as hell be annoying.

But most of all, it just irritated the fuck out of me. Like I’ve said multiple times in this rant. I do this for free. I don’t expect you guys to know this, but in order to get these substantial updates when I can manage to actually feel well enough to write and get them published, it takes me EIGHT TO TWELVE HOURS of sitting in front of a computer screen to have a chapter finished. On a good day. Yes. Most of the chapters I put out are done in one day, in one block, and I’m often up until 5 AM finishing something up. I have severe ADHD. Sometimes it is a chore to get shit put on a page because I can’t sit down and focus my thoughts enough to sound even coherent. Sometimes I have issues keeping up with what the beginning of a long sentence was about and I have to constantly keep up with what the fuck I’m even talking about in any given thought.

So, you have an author with a severe executive function disorder attempting to concentrate hard enough to get her own thoughts in character for each and every character that is featured in any given story while attempting to resist even the most mundane distractions while desperately hoping she’s going to hit a period of hyperfocus long enough to get substantial work down, but if that happens she’ll probably forget to eat because she’s on a writing binge that goes on with actual significant work for a period of several hours.

I love writing, despite the challenges I have to deal with in order just to get it done. I love most of the comments that I receive. I’m coming off a period of extreme depression from some family issues I was dealing with. My skin is rather thin at the moment and that irritated the fuck out of me, but those two comments knocked more wind out of my sails that I really wanted them to, and that bugs me even more.

But I am more experienced in fic writing than probably your average person. This commenter pissed me the fuck off, but I’ve moved past this, it’s hardly shattered my motivation to write forever.

But a careless commenter could easily do that to someone just getting into fanfiction. And it makes me wonder just how often this happens everyday, every hour, when entitled, spoiled people who think their needs are more important than the author doing this FOR FREE decide to voice their terrible opinions on their works. I love my readers, I don’t hold myself beholden to them, but they are extraordinarily important to me. Plot, pacing, and character development are all my own when I write because first and foremost, I write for myself. It’s a hobby that I clearly have to work very hard at to even be remotely successful at, and taking anyone else’s standards into account is never going to happen when I have to live up to my own already very high expectations. But I do keep y’all in mind when I’m devoting my time, energy, and effort in. The chapter lengths I have partly exist to make up for the wait times I inevitably have between each release. I very much know that I am sporadic and inconsistent when updating. So, when I do, I want to have something that isn’t just a whisper in the wind when it finally cycles to the top of the AO3 listing.

I know there are inevitably readers who didn’t like my content, or do think my stuff is too long. That’s fine. But don’t come into my space and give me two comments that were effectively “TL;DR” and expect that not to be a slap in the face. Because it is. I have wonder if the fandom kids today even know the kind of slap backs this sort of thing would have gotten in LiveJournal.

But, never mind that. I’m a big girl, I took some petty revenge in deleting that bullshit from my boards and then setting the fic to moderated mode, but what I would like anyone who decides to read through what is actually a long winded post (all my rants are, admittedly) to learn is that you are not reading professional work. You are not reading work that has been paid for. You are not reading work that has been professionally edited. I’m not saying that you can’t have standards for fic, lord knows I have many, but I don’t go into an author’s work and leave shitty comments. Never. Constructive criticism on fanfiction keeps the author’s time in mind, their skill level over what they’re actually capable of, and whether or not they’re even open to criticism. Some authors don’t even want your advice. They just want to know that you liked it. And if you don’t, just don’t say anything. I’m not quite that fragile personally, when someone is giving me useful criticism that can be used to actually improve my quality of writing, but I will freely admit that clearly I have a sore spot about comments addressing word counts.

Get out of here with that shit.

In short. If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.

#fanfiction wank #shitty commentating #learn to constructively comment #pissed me right the fuck off #Rant Of Epic Proportions(TM)

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