#i truly love those fanfics of guys i don't even know

[thebluespacecow]

see sometimes, sometimes i'm reading fanfiction about stories that i have never expirienced before

so i can say shit like ''you get him so well!!!! you realy truly understand this guy to a point i can't fathom!!'' all i want.

i have never seen the show, or read the book or watched those movies

but i'll still SAY it, ''i get it, i get him'' no i do not

[strongheartneteyam]

Realize where you belong.

Pairing: neteyam sully x female!human!reader/female!dreamwalker!reader

Neteyam is aged up.

Chapter 2

CW: angst, reader hates her life, neteyam is like her "secret admirer" but he eventually becomes obsessed, so, it gives off some creepy vibes, possessive neteyam, forbidden love, neteyam is REALLY protective over her, neteyam isn't really fond of humans (hates them) and only makes an exception for reader, TRIGGER WARNING for a few depression symptoms (such as reader holding back tears and looking miserable really often), stalking, obsessive behavior & possessiveness

Synopsis: Reader is unhappy with her human life. She works for the lab as a cook. She's a Dreamwalker and she spends every free day she gets walking through Pandora's forests. In one of those days, Neteyam sees her but she doesn't notice him. He falls in love, seeing how happy she is amidst nature. Neteyam finds out she's actually a human in an Avatar, so, he finds a way to go where her real body is. He hates to admit it but, seeing her in her human body, he realizes he still loves her. After watching her, he notices how she's always happier when she's in her Avatar, so, he develops a deeper connection to her. However, he becomes obsessive. Reader has only heard about him, the famous son of Jake Sully and future Olo'eyktan, praised for his great achievements as a young Omatikaya. After getting reader's attention, Neteyam asks her to choose to live forever in her Avatar, becoming his mate and making tsaheylu with him, gaining a new home as a fresh member of his tribe. Reader is scared and torn, since, even though she's intensely attracted to him and only truly enjoys life when she's Dreamwalking, she doesn't really know him and she's afraid of dying when trying to go past Eywa's eye. But Neteyam just won't give up on her that easily.

♡ This is Reader's Avatar

☆ This is the official playlist for this story, the songs I listen to while working on it.

•

Finally, this fanfic is out!! lots of people seemed to love the tiny sneak peek I posted so... I hope you guys will love the fanfic itself too hehe I'm so relieved I could finally post it ooof My environment is the worst EVER rn & i haven't had any motivation or focus to write lately BUT i seem to be getting out of that damned writer's block I was in (ITS THE WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD UGH HATE IT TO DEATH)

Not proofread. My life is a hurricane, so, we don't work with proofread stories here. Hope you find it in your hearts to forgive me, my angels :')

na'vi words:

yawne - beloved

tsaheylu - the neurological bond the na'vi make with their mate, through their tendrils, at the end of their long braid.

Chapter 1

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

I love your touch, cold as ice

And I love every single tear you cry

I just love the way you're losing your life

Oh, my baby, how beautiful you are

Oh, my darling, completely torn apart

Gone With The Sin (HIM)

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Neteyam would look at you every moment he could. He didn't have that much free time since he was the Olo'eyktan's son and had so many responsibilities weighting on his shoulders. But he would always make any sacrifice he needed to make to find time to see you. Even if it meant using the few hours he had to himself to contemplate you. His sad, gloomy-eyed, beautiful girl. You were not actually his yet, but, he was determined to make that change.

Neteyam saw you holding back tears way too damn often, so, he was always deeply worried about you, and, that was one of the reasons why he was always creeping around, high up in branches of trees located in Hell's Gate, watching over you, almost every day, ready to help you, defend you from any danger, to say "screw it" to how out of the blue it would be if he - a stranger, a male na'vi stranger - just came up to you and said "hey, I've been watching you for a while, and… I'm so, so in love with you. Please, leave this damn idiotic human life you live and let Eywa help you be transferred to your Avatar body for good, just like she helped my father. You're so insanely pretty like this - and I have never felt attracted to any female of your demon kind before, so, believe me when I talk about your beauty - but you look even prettier when you're in your Avatar form. Let me make you my mate, let me make you the future Olo'eyktan's mate. I can give you a far better life than the one you have now"

He knew he was just a weird alien boy (as the humans would probably say), stalking you, always up in the highest tree branches he could find and reach, watching a girl while she cooks - as it was your job - like a hunter watching their prey. But he meant no harm. On the contrary, he meant to take care of you, to save you from it all. Because he wasn't blind. Neteyam saw how unhappy you looked while peeling potatoes (he knew what they were because his dad who was once human told him and his siblings about how delicious that vegetable from Earth tasted, especially when it was made as French fries) to cook on the high-tech stove the humans used to prepare their meals in and prepare mashed potatoes to those damn lab guys who invaded his Planet and did nothing but harm.

Neteyam thought it to be unnecessary. His future mate could easily prepare the same potatoes in a bonfire he would light up for you in the Omatikaya forest. He knew they would taste even better roasted in the natural fire than just plainly cooked in that energy fueled cooking device the humans used. He could give you a life so incredibly better than the one you had right now, it pained him to see his yawne working so hard to feed every damn scientist in that cold, air-conditioned lab while not being as appreciated and thanked by them as you deserved to be. You could be preparing food to feed his children instead, the sons and daughters he would give you, if only you accepted becoming his forever mate.

He hated the humans. They didn't know how to lead a proper life. But you were different.

Neteyam knew how breathtaking you looked in a na'vi like body because the first time he saw you, you were in your Avatar body - as you were a Dreamwalker - and that's when he fell in love with you. But he learned to love your human body too. He could never hate you, even in your human form. You were the only human he did not despise.

The day Neteyam first saw you, he was out in the forest to hunt and gather food, collecting bladder polyps, lionberry seeds and trying to kill a hexapede, so, he could bring all of it home and him and his family could eat a nutritious dinner.

That's when he heard a squeaky, funny laugh. It was a female voice, he recognized. Neteyam followed that sound just like he was a sailor and the girl whose laugh he heard was a mermaid, bewitching his senses and drawing him closer.

When he saw you, it was like his heart was going to explode in a thousand pieces, so fast it was beating inside his rigid ribcage, so strongly the blood was being pumped through his arteries. He knew he had to make you his mate, to have you forever.

Neteyam had always been a practical and rational young man, he had to be. He was the eldest son and had to look after his 3 younger siblings and not show a single sign of weakness when his father would scold him in a harsh tone, whenever any of his siblings - specially his younger brother, Lo'ak -, got into trouble and somehow, Neteyam ended up having to take responsibility over their actions. "But that girl… that beautiful, ethereal girl… she makes me believe in things I've never even considered before. I know it sounds stupid to say that about a girl I just met, only some minutes ago but I don't care", he thought. Only he and Eywa herself knew the raw, powerful feeling he was experiencing at that moment. He just wanted to let go for a while. To not force himself to be all brains, zero heart for once, just once. And you were gifting him the opportunity to do just that. Your beauty was so enchanting, it could leave any creature in awe.

His father had once told him about Christianity, one of the most popular religions back on the glory days of the Planet Earth, and, of course he didn't follow those beliefs, his spirituality was completely based on Eywa, the Great Mother, the spirit and moving energy of Pandora, but, if the beings called "angels" his father talked about were real, Neteyam was utterly sure that they could only look like you.

You were perfect. Every curve of your body, every bioluminescent freckle, every pattern of your stripes, your long dark braided hair falling like water on your flawless back, as you kept smiling and touching every single flower you could see, playing in a foolish way, just like a child. He felt a primal urge coming from his guts to make tsaheylu with you right there, right at that moment.

So many thoughts roamed through Neteyam's mind: "I need her… right here, right now. She's… ugh… I've never felt anything like this before… What's going on with your stupid mind, Neteyam?! You can't just choose any girl to be your mate, you'll be the next Olo'eyktan, remember?! The best choice would be a girl who has a calling to be Tsahìk. Maybe your parents will try to arrange a marriage, to find the perfect match for you. Damn! Who am I trying to fool? She is the only perfect match for me…"

Neteyam started to watch you go about the forest every chance he got.

When he found out you were actually a Dreamwalker, a human in a body created in a laboratory, a hybrid of demon and na'vi, a freak... It was like his world was falling apart, piece by tiny piece crashing on the floor. How did he not notice your fifth finger before?! Was he that much under your spell, that blinded by how beautiful and charming you were?, he asked himself.

So, he told himself he was going to find a way to at least see what your true form looked like. He hissed at the thoughts and feelings you had caused him the whole way to Hell's Gate, where the laboratory was and where he knew all the humans that stayed in Pandora and had an Avatar stayed.

When Neteyam saw you in your human body, he got hit by something as strong as lightning. The moment he sniffed your sweet scent (the smell you had in your Avatar had notes of your original human scent, as your DNA was used to build that body), the moment he recognized that melodious voice… The expression in those eyes, that smile, that laughter… it was you. His yawne.

He didn't understand how that was possible, what he was feeling. Nevertheless, he realized he still loved you. His heart still beat fast for you. It didn't matter which physical form you took. Na'vi or human. You were you. And he loved you. Madly.

His people had a great contempt towards the ones who Dreamwalked. They were "demons in false bodies", like his grandma and his mother always said. And Neteyam himself felt the same. Worse, he had felt disgusted by the love and desire you made him feel, back when he watched you wandering around the Omatikaya lands, when you would jump like a little kid, so happy playing with the bioluminescent, neon plants of the forest.

But, still, that feeling lingered inside him. The attachment, the deep affection, the devotion… He could not comprehend it.

All Neteyam could grasp was that he hated all humans, but you were the only exception.

Even though you were originally human, you had a na'vi heart. He just knew that. As crazy and impossible as it sounded, he figured out it was true. And that blew his mind. That sorrowful girl he was seeing cooking in a small technological kitchen was not the same one he had seen at the forest. But it was, at the same time. It apparently made no sense, but it actually did. You were not where you belonged. You did not belong imprisoned among those four walls that the other humans kept you in. That you were keeping yourself in. You belonged free amidst the Pandoran trees. You did not belong in those big human clothes. You belonged in a comfortable loincloth and a big leaf necklace covering your beautiful breasts, letting the wind hit your skin.

You seemed out of place in that environment you were currently in. And that made Neteyam feel something so overpowering. He knew it was useless to try and fight it. He was not even sure if he even wanted to fight it anymore. That feeling was good. It felt just like what he felt when he thought you were a na'vi girl. He even felt attracted to you, even though he still thought you looked much prettier in your Avatar body.

He was fully aware you were one of the demons. But you were not like the rest of them. You were special. He could tell that. He could tell you'd be a hundred per cent happier if he could convince you to become na'vi. And that's exactly what he was planning to do. He still did not know how, but he would find a way.

༊⁀➷

Taglist:

@crazy4books1

@samistars

@lik0

@miri-belle

@nerdybouquetofkittens-blog

@xxunnie

@your-girl-mj

@sereisstuff

@darktyrantwinner

@henhouse-horrors

@explosiongamora

@yeosxxx

[fandomofhappiness]

Erasermic (Aizawa Shouta/Hizashi Yamada) Big Rec Fic List for starters and not

Hello everyone! I’m fandomofhappiness, and today I’d love to share with Erasermic fans my silly reader’s selection of fanfics! I’m still looking for new stories. And this list will definitely update! I would especially like to give this rec to those who are just starting out. When I got into the fandom, I searched through all possible recommendation lists. I hope my own list will help new Erasermic fans and even those who have been here for a while.

I want to present you with the best of the best, which, according to my preferences in writing style, plot complexity and brilliance of the authors, amazed me during my time in the fandom. I won’t drag it out, let's go!

P.S.: This list doesn’t contain PWP stories, I’m not really here for smut but there are stories that contain 18+ chapters.

fandomofhappiness’s top five + 1 greatest Erasermic stories:

The Waters of Lethe by buffyaddict13 Married Erasermic, Case and Rescue Fic | 179,133 words

foh’s comment: A relatively new story with a mind-blowing plot. The fanfic has catastrophically few kudos, I consider it one of the most underrated. While rescuing a boy from weirdo dealers, Eraserhead is captured and placed with 10 other people who are going to be sold. Present Mic and a team of heroes plan to save the victims. But there is much more to save than it seems.

The Way I Behaved by ForTheWoolfy Villains & Heroes, Action & Adventure, Hurt/Comfort | 117270 words

foh’s comment: One of the most heartbreaking stories, so wonderful and beautifully written that I fucking choked on tears. Don't worry about the description, don't worry about Mic being the bad guy. I implore you to read this story, I would have been happy if someone had recommended it to me when I was starting out.

Nine Lives by machiroads Aizawa-centric, Hospitals and Injury Recovery, Post-Paranormal Liberation War Arc, Slow Burn | 149,559 words

foh’s comment: This fanfic was a great inspiration to me. It is a masterpiece of understanding the character, immersion in medicine, the unique intimacy between characters, friendship, respect - this is the beauty of this fanfic. The story of Aizawa's recovery after losing his leg and eye.

Present Mic's Totally Bullshit Life by Kyurilin Biography Fic, Slow Burn | 54,952 words

foh’s comment: One of the earliest stories I happen to read. I couldn't get through it the first time because it was too heavy for me. At the time I started reading, I didn't even know who Oboro is. Brilliant in its beauty and description of Present Mic’s character. This fic for those who are not afraid to break a heart and put it back together piece by piece.

And the Sky Wept by tiniest_hands_in_all_the_land Yamada-centric, Biography Fic, Slow Burn, Angst | 155,468 words

foh’s comment: A very detailed and truly heart-breaking story about two friends going through the grief of losing their best friend. Depicts moments of Yamada Hizashi’s life trying to cope with loss, while making an effort to remain his and Aizawa’s friendship. I cried a lot and was devastated. It’s not easy to read but it worth its happy ending.

Enchanted by MarziPanda95 Yamada-centric, Quirk Accident, Angst, Hurt/Comfort | 30,045 words

foh’s comment: This is one of the best Erasermic plot-stories! I warn you: there's heavy angst!Hizashi. Yamada gets hit with quirk that allows every single person victim faces to give them commands and the victim obeys them unquestioningly. All week Present Mic carries out other people's tasks and commands, until one day the worst happens.

No Quirks AU:

teach me a lesson (about you) by frootjuiceg Teachers and Schools, Campings, Getting Together | 18,565 words

foh’s comment: I love AUs where there are no quirks, like some modern AU. Yamada and Aizawa are just some normal HS teachers. Yamada tries to befriend with Aizawa flirting his way out to Shouta’s heart, but Aizawa thinks they have nothing in common until a school trip changes his mind.

By Moonlight Getting Together, From Strangers to Lovers, Secret Identity | 41189 words

foh’s comment: Hizashi works as a reporter for a gossip column. He decides to write about an avenger, not suspecting that his close colleague, with whom he begins to fall in love, is the avenger he writes about. This is SO interesting and romantic, please read it was wild.

Black Keys Make Music Too by RohanBerry

Aizawa-centric, Slow Burn, Widowhood, Hurt/Comfort | 65432 words

foh’s comment:

One of the best No Quirks!AU, felt so realistic when I first read it. An overwhelming and beautiful in its sadness, but there’s a happy ending. After death of his husband, Oboro, Aizawa doesn't live, rather he exists. And that was until the day he met his new neighbour who started to play piano at Sundays.

Hook, Line, and Sinker by KuriKuri Getting to Know Each Other, Mistaken Identity | 26,116 words

foh’s comment: A simple, slightly long, and a little confounded story about a teacher and a famous singer meeting online. Only the teacher doesn't think he's talking to a real celebrity.

Aizawa the Aristocat by Collateral_Beauty Cats AU (the Aristocats AU, your honour), Family Feels and Dynamics, Probably Unfinished Work | 53,810 words

foh’s comment: Wait! I could scare with ‘probably unfinished’, but please-please go read it. It’s so well-written and very interesting. Like it’s the living dream: Cat Aizawa adopting some kittens, rescues and action, humour and  romance… CATS. Go on, support the dear author, maybe they will write more chapters.

Toil & Trouble by KuriKuri Getting To Know Each Other, Magic | 11248 words

foh’s comment: 10/10 cuteness, magic, and romance. Shota is a witch who can turn into a cat. Hizashi is his neighbour-siren with a very sunny balcony.

The Ascension of Sunlight by YamiHeart AU Space Deities, Hurt/Comfort | 5512 words

foh’s comment: A love story between the moon and the sunlight. A very beautiful and short story.

A Demonstration in Dueling by ByTheBi and GhostAlebrije Established Erasermic | 1,833 words

foh’s comment: So, I needed this particular AU. Go ahead, read about two flirting professors bastards dueling in front of students.

Necessity by Zombiesms Erasermic x Steven Universe Fusion AU | 614 words

In-Canon Verse Fics

Post-It Notes by StarBeeCreates Mutual Pining, Identity Reveal, Action and Case Fic | 53,139 words

foh’s comment: Flirty-ass villain Present Mic and pining Hero Eraserhead playing mouse-cat game revealing very-big plot. Go read it, it really worth every praise I give it.

Dirtied Black Heart by politelydeclined Married Erasermic, Character Study, Post-USJ, PTSD | 3,795 words

foh’s comment: A brilliant description of Aizawa's PTSD after USJ. It's works like this that make Erasermic worth reading. Author explores how USJ affected Shouta's personal life from different angles, very touching and encouraging story.

If At First You Don't Succeed... by MarziPanda95 Yamada-centric, Groundhog Day, Heavy Angst | 26,625 words

foh’s comment: I admit that I don't know if there have been any other Groundhog Day or time loop works, but I can tell you that this gem is one of them. I'll warn you right away: this is a very heavy story. But it's worth every single word.

Written Words by formerlyBravo Diaries and Letters Fic, High School Sweethearts, Secret Relationship | 10,949 words

foh’s comment: I love the diary concepts! Because it's like a little detective story, even if we know who it's about, the main characters don't. And it's a really cute story about how the girls of 1A found a diary, in which someone tells their love story.

Across Our Universe by LeafontheWinf2 Mutual Pining, Action/Adventure, fckn YEARNING | 32992 words

foh’s comment: It will be mostly a happy story about friendship and space adventures! A little angst, because that's always necessary, but overall it should be fun. And the two angsty boys will be sweet and romantic and will be together by the end. A MAJOR crossover with Doctor Who. One of the best stories I've ever read! Emotional, beautiful, very cleverly constructed. The Doctor is just awesome bean.

All of Me by ill go with that then (Linelenagain) Established Erasermic, Proposal Fic | 8,111 words

foh’s comment: Aizawa Shouta’s trying to propose for almost 8k words. It’s funny but emphasizes an important part in relationship – to talk to your partners.

Catastrophes and Companions by estelraca Aizawa-centric, Cats | 15,685 words

foh’s comment: This story felt very differently when I first read it. In most stories, Aizawa already has cats, sometimes even more than one. This fanfic attracted me because Aizawa wants to get a cat so much, but he always makes a responsible decision not to. The story is about the importance of responsibility to our little friends, about dreams, unfulfilled and fulfilled.

Improbable Botany 101 by Tierfal Yamada-centric, Hanahaki Disease | 46,486 words

foh’s comment: One of the best Erasermic fanfics I've ever had the honor of reading. The author's style is so melodious, so gentle and soft. It seemed a bit drawn out, but I was happy from start to finish. My favorite part is the radio show.

Just a Push by Say_Jay Teenage Fic, Trainings | 4,940 words

foh’s comment: A beautiful and incredible story from Say_Jay about two boys training together to be the best. I really like how the boys' motives and actions are described. The text is very light but intriguing. It's a pleasure to read.

on air by lonelydoctors Marriage Proposal, Fluff | 2,846 words

foh’s comment: I'm really trying to pick more realistic and heavy works to read! I do really try! But I'm just a human, and forgive my silly heart, but I can't pass by such a frank writing! I can't. So forgive my sentimentality. Shouta proposes Hizashi during his show.

look after you by dizzyingly_dreamy Family Feels and Dynamics, Angst and Fluff | 10,512 words

foh’s comment: Classic EraserMic+Shinsou Family fanfic, but with a nice touch of deep analysis from the author. Though you may find the idea not really original, it has really good points on Aizawa’s character, you just can’t go away from this story before you finish reading.

Grounded by thechaoscryptid Aizawa-centric, Hurt/Comfort, Mental Health Issues | 2,197 words

foh’s comment: A pictorial text-study of character’s dissociation. I would call it a cruel beauty of words.

Year by Year (two-shot series) by ill go with that then (Linelenagain) Getting Together, High School Sweethearts | 12,444 words

foh’s comment: Written before Shirakumo appeared in canon! One of the cutest things I've ever read. Don't get me wrong, I don't like over-the-top fluff either - I'm all for realism! But... this is irresistible. Just read it. How One Training Session Leads to Friendship, Love, and Mutual Help.

Change Comes by fecklessphilanderer Aizawa-centric, Character Study, Angst, Post-USJ | 4252 words

foh’s comment: For these little gems that I love fanfiction. The work isn't long, but it covers an interesting topic. Shouta's face changes slightly after plastic surgery after USJ attack. He doesn't notice it until it's specifically pointed out. This work is wholesome and absolutely brilliant.

“Promise.” by Lingxz After-UA, Grief, Miscommunication | 7,793 words

foh’s comment: This isn’t really Erasermic romance story but it studies their relationship on the deep level, discovering their lives after losing Oboro. No more words, it’s very sad, but it’s hopeful.

Tattletale and The Path We Chose by LipstickVenom AU! Present Mic is Vigilante, Angst and Action | sum. ~250k words

foh’s comment: Initially I wanted to list them separately, but calling them series seemed wrong. They flow smoothly into each other, if the author had not chosen to separate them, it would have been a full-fledged big story of 250k+ words.

In my opinion, another underrated work on these two. A very plausible explanation of the relationship. Slow-burn, but not so slow to  get bored. I love this work for the nakedness of feelings, for the plausibility of emotion. Plot is driving and interesting to catch on, so – go on!

Family Ties (series) by LipstickVenom Hurt/Comfort, Biography Fic, Family | 12975 words

foh’s comment: A great two-fic series exploring Shouta's household and past. From one of my favorite authors.

Ledges. by sunkensubtext Mutual Pining, Weddings | 16592 words

foh’s comment: A great love story in the good old mutual pining style. Shouta's family is here! And they are nice people. Shouta's older sister is getting married in America, Shota takes Hizashi with him to translate. Two fools try to hide that they have feelings.

Finding Safety in the Mountains by ravyn_sinclai Different Meeting AU, Getting to Know Each Other, Hurt/Comfort | 24298 words

foh’s comment: Very beautiful and relatively fresh story! In this story, Yamada and Aizawa are not heroes, but ordinary people trying to find salvation in a small village and live a quiet peaceful life. I repeat, everything in this fanfic is beautiful: from the description of the nature and town to the plot. Just read it!

Still Here by buffyaddict13 Pre-Relationship, Character Study, Angst, Spoilers to last chapters | 6201 words

foh’s comment: It was very hard to read even though it catches on manga and anime scenes. This work studies deeply Aizawa and Yamada feelings and dealing with the death of Oboro. If you really like Rooftop Trio storyline you’ll be very involved. I respect everything that buffyaddict13 writes, so your turn to read it.

when you cried, I learned what helplessness tastes like. because all I could do was swallow by ethereal_catharsis Getting Together, Abusive Relationships, Heavy Hurt/Comfort | 7485 words

foh’s comment: Hizashi has an abusive boyfriend, his friends are very worried. And Shouta heavily caring for him worries more than anybody. If abusive relationships triggers you please be aware, this shit is sick. I wanted to read something like this because this theme is important to be known and discussed.

Reasons by Nobody has no body Aizawa-centric, First Meeting, Action | 6k+ words

foh’s comment: Written pre-Oboro. The story of how Shouta entered the first year of the hero academy, met Hizashi, and survived the fight with the villain. Very detailed and analyzing fic.

Present Mic is Civilian AU

A Few Disasters Short by Robbirdthe8th (FictionalFeather) Different Meeting AU, Getting Together, Pining | 36,781 words

foh’s comment: Hizashi is a famous musician who happens to visit a cat cafe owned by Aizawa and his small family. Hizashi comes there for inspiration and a desire to get to find out more about the mysterious owner of the cafe. A wonderful romantic story, with some vigilante!Shinsou and precious Eri.

missing out (on you) by White Different Meeting AU, Getting to Know Each Other | 23,456 words

foh’s comment: An interesting and romantic take on what would happen if Yamada wasn't a hero, but a simple radio host who encountered the underground hero Aizawa. A simple but captivating story.

Musutafu Nights: Track 1 by ByTheBi Different Meeting AU, Getting to Know Each Other | 1,844 words

foh’s comment: Short but cute. This civllian!AU has grown on me.

The Waiting Area by MarziPanda95 Hospitals, Getting Together | 23,158 words

foh’s comment: If you ever watched ‘Just like Heaven’ (a 2005 film), you may find some references. It’s romantic and a little bit silly, but somehow I grew on it. Hizashi here is so clever and so lovely.

Quirk Accident Trope:

deep roots do not wither by Ink_On_Parchment Mutual Pining, Flower Language | 12,018 words

foh’s comment: Mic gets hit with some child’s innocent quirk that makes a crown of flowers that indicates his deep feelings. If you like the language of flowers - this is the work for you. A beautiful and interesting approach to this trope.

Running to Stand Still by Kiyoko_Michi Aizawa-centric, Non-Sexual De-Aging of Character, Secret Identity | 42,604 words

foh’s comment: Aizawa gets hit with age-regression quirk that causes him to forget almost fifteen years of his past. He’s struggling to find out what is going on. When I started this rec list I marked this work as ‘very close to canon, could’ve been a part of it even’. I meant that it’s very well written, go read.

Cat-sualty by LowlyWriter Animal Transformation, Married Erasermic | 12,360 words

foh’s comment: Catzawa! You can't miss the well-written story of Shouta Aizawa's transformation into a cat.

Authors Who Made Erasermic Special For Thousands People

deafmic

foh’s comment: In my opinion, deafmic is the foundation-stone of Erasermic fanfiction. If you just start with Erasermic, please go check deafmic’s works. I cannot pick one of them, they are all good, interesting, driving, experimental – everything!

Say_Jay

foh’s comment: Jay is a legend who has written many narrative, action and experimental works. Works to read and reread forever.

YamiHeart

foh’s comment: Yami has created many great and interesting aus and in-canonverse stories that any of us, Erasermic fans, love and deeply care about. You will never get bored with the imagination of this author!

KuruKuri

foh’s comment: KuriKuri is another legendary author who you can get a ton of No Qurks!AU from. All of this author's stories are rated very highly and each one definitely deserves it.

That is all for now. Thank you for checking out my recomendation list. All of these authors are sunshines and great peope who put their souls and hearts into this fandom. After reading these stories, please give them kudos and write your comments. My List will be continued with Aizawa & Shinsou father-son, Erasermic Family recomendation list soon!

[evilfrogcereal29]

Pizza guy!Nikto - Chapter 1

(ok... This is going to be like, maybe one of the most weirdly specific fanfics you've ever read. For context: I work at a pizza place IRL. Thats it. Thats the only context. I was at work and. Thought about Nikto working there too. That's all you need to know. Enjoy :]!!!

This is going to be a Nikto x GN!customer!reader, but reader is NOT introduced in this chapter.

Cw/tws: mentions of violence- including towards an animal! I think thats all? Enjoy :)!!

NOTE: all text in red & italics are Nikto's voices

Nikto was bored.

Retirement was miserable, and Nikto found himself restless day in, and day out. Unable to find peace while wasting away at home. Sure, he had lot's of retirement money, but he had this urge to work, to kill. He would give anything to be on a plane to another mission right about now, but he was too 'broken'. That's what they basically told him. Too mentally unwell to keep working. A hazard to his own team.

Heh.

What the fuck do they know? They don't know what goes on in his head. So what he broke that recruit's arm? They touched him when he warned them of the consequences. Or who cares that he hit one of his higher-up's service dogs with the buggy? It should've been servicing it's owner, not under the damn vehicle! He's not a danger, the other voices are!

Speaking of voices, they aren't reacting well either, metaphorically biting away at Nikto's psyche each day he did fucking nothing. He felt useless, and they reminded him of that. You idiot, you deserve your suffering for being the way you are. Broken. Broken little solider.

He still gets calls from his mates in the service, especially Krueger, who always makes sure to call as often as possible to keep the man updated on missions, even if they didn't concern him anymore. He suggested that Nikto pick up a part-time job, not for the money, but the work. God (and Krueger) only knows what Nikto's mind gets upto when left to its own devices.

Nikto scoffed at first, he didn't like the idea of working at some measley fast food job, he was above that. He crawled through the fucking trenches and ripped out the throats of women and men, and would be reduced to... What? Cleaning a fucking stove? Heating up processed foods for weak civilians? No. He wouldn't. The voices mocked him, this is what we've been reduced to? Patheic.

And then the rot set in.

Krueger had been very insistant on a visit the second he had time away from work, flying out to see Nikto even as the man ignored his texts and calls. He wasn't dead, Krueger knew that, but he also wasn't in a good place. He couldn't let his companion live like this pathetic slob. Cause that's exactly what he was becoming.

Water and alcohol bottles littered the floor, stacks on stacks of old, half eaten take-out. Junk that should’ve been tossed long ago created walled barriers throughout the house. It was a scene out of horders, and the smell was awful. Christ. Krueger was no clean freak, but this? He'd rather sleep next to corpses than this cesspool of rotting filfth, and in the middle of it all, sat his balaclava-ed, smelly friend on the sofa. Krueger grimmaced, taking careful steps. He nearly stepped on poor Sputnik, who had become content with spending her days lazying about, peeing in places without Nikto's knowledge, and eating off his leftover scraps of food, growing just as lethargic as her owner.

"Nikto... Scheiße..” he would almost be outraged at the man’s carelessness if he didn’t understand how the other functioned, without a job, without a purpose, Nikto was truly a nobody. He lifted the man’s head with a gentleness, an action only someone like Krueger could get away with, looking into those glazed-over icy blues.

“This is… this is bad Nikto..” he mutters, eyes filled with..love? Concern? Something Nikto wasn’t used to often. Nikto finally shows evidence of life as his eyes flicker up in wordless understanding. Krueger continues,

"I can't stand to see you like this. You can't stand being like this. I'm going to help you."

Krueger lifts his friend up, albiet with mild arguing and growling from the disguntled bear of a man that Nikto is. He sets Nikto's cheap laptop on his lap and types in job sites, which already has Nikto tense.

"Krueger- чёрт побери! you're acting like my fucking mother-"

"good, about time someone comes in and wipes your ass, if not yourself." Krueger grumbles, scrolling through the job offers, "what's your SNILS...?"

After a painstaking back and forth, and Krueger prying for all of Nikto's personal info, he sent in a few applications on his friend's behalf. Patting the other on the back as Nikto's thumbs rubbed at his temples, fighting back the urge to pulverize his only real friend. You really should, he's a nuisance...

"this is... Not ideal.." Nikto finally grumbles, finishing the last of some lukewarm whisky from the bottle.

"none of this is, meine freund, but this...Is worse." Noone has ever seen them like this, so...domestic. In reality, this was as hard for Krueger as it was for Nikto, The Alligence wasn't the same without the Russian, fighting wasn't the same. Krueger rested a hand on his shoulder.

"everything is going to change, can you try to change a little with it?"

Change? Krueger wanted him to change? Was that even possible? He'd been so set in his ways ever since the incident. But the look in Krueger eyes let Nikto know that there wasn't really a choice.

What are you kidding? You could change as far as you could throw a boulder! Never!

He sighed, deeply. His shoulders slumping miserably as he exhaled.

"fine. But If we don't like the job-"

"ja, ja, you don't have to stay. I get it. I can't make you." He interupted, waving his hand dismissively, "but don't just give up right away. Can you promise me that?"

Nikto hated making promises, he hated feeling like he owed anyone anything, he didn't take on debts or deals. Go ahead, make more promises you can't keep. We know the truth.

Yet here he was, being interviewed by an elderly couple, who pitied him for his past as a solider.

"me and Martha are going to see how you fair in the kitchen, and if that's turns out to be too overwhelming we can move you to a more simple job like delivery. Just bring the customers their pizzas." The eldery man said with an acknowledging smile.

He nodded to the man, Michael, reaching across the table to shake his hand, thanking him begrudgingly for this... 'Opportunity'. Thats damn well what it was, but Nikto didn't quite see it that way yet. As he left with a work shirt displaying the place's name and logo, he felt his heart drop. And a shrill, annoying voice invading his mind.

You are truely a fucking Развалюха. Good luck ever trying to live a normal life!

And now Nikto was worried.

------------------------------------------------------

Hai :3 I hope you enjoyed this first chapter, I wanted to introduce reader in this first part but it was getting long and I also just wanted to get something out. There will be more chapters for this, but they might be kind of slow to come out😭 work takes up a LOT of my time tbh, but also working inspires me cause...yk pizza place setting so- its a double edged sword. But if you enjoyed pls like and reblog it means sm♥️♥️ ty for reading!!

And to the person who sent me an ask in my inbox about the relationship dynamics between NiktoKrueger + criminal!reader, I see u and ur creative vision, I started writing something today in response ;) just gimme some time!!!

Also an @ list for some mooties who I think would like to see this :3

@simp4konig @lizzy019 @fishsinsareacknowledged @zoloftwithdrawalnausea sorry If I missed anyone, lmk if you'd like to be tagged (or not tagged) in future chapters!!

[longbobmckenzie]

Things I'd do...

... if I were a Fusebox writer. Fusebox, if you're reading this, feel free to take these into consideration. I know you won't though because it would require more work on your part.

(note: this ended up being a lot longer than I expected, but I probably should have expected that)

5 girls, 5 boys

Let's go back to the early seasons when we started off with a full lineup of 5 couples to start off with. Like I said, this means more work, more characters. But it also allows for...

More unromanceable characters

Hear me out. The last truly unromanceable male character was... Toby? I think? But for the most part, all the male characters from S6-S9 are available in some way (even if it's only at the finale/reunion, which is really just a copout from FB because they don't want to branch routes but still want to be able to say that everyone's romanceable).

Here's the thing. Everyone wants to romance their favourite characters, nobody wants to meet a character and really love them only to find out you can't have them. Trust me, I've been there. But it's also not the end of the world, and it means you can read/write fanfics for that character, pine for them from afar, etc etc. Maybe it's my sadism talking, but it kind of makes things more interesting in a way? To me it's kinda boring to have all these guys in the villa who would get with me at the drop of a hat (obviously excepting the slow burn LIs).

But the thing about unromanceable characters is that you NEED them in order to write a realistic season with distinct characters who aren't just interchangeable with one another based on MC's choices. Those characters can help drive the plot, they can have canon storylines, they can be friends, they don't have to share dialogue, etc etc.

First coupling

So with those first 2 points out of the way, here's what I'd like for the first coupling:

Of the 5 guys, 1 is completely unavailable to be chosen, and another is not an endgame LI. Think Noah and Rocco in S2 - one can't be coupled up with but is still a slow burn LI, the other CAN be coupled up with but is always going to be dumped. I think this formula from S2 works so well because it still means you have 3 OG guys to be endgame LIs but also allows for the other 2 to be part of fixed plots.

I want the boys to choose instead of the girls. HOW HAS THIS NOT BEEN DONE YET?!?!?! On the show, the girls only picked on day 1 for the first... 1 or 2 seasons? and then it was always boys choosing until they started messing around with other options. But this could work SO WELL for the game! MC has the choice for each guy to step forward or not. If she steps forward for the unromanceable guy, he picks someone else. If she doesn't step forward for someone, he won't pick her. If she steps forward, gets picked, and then steps forward again for someone else, that person steals her and it gets acknowledged throughout the game a bit (minor branching!) If she doesn't step forward for anyone, she ends up being the last picked. IT WOULD BE SO MUCH FUN

Couples/Sneaking around

You shouldn't be able to do bits with someone you're not coupled up with except under certain circumstances:

Casa Amor

You're developing a relationship with someone but not able to couple up with them (or one of you gets stolen) and you're upfront with your partners about going to the daybeds together

You're sneaking around behind people's backs but there WILL be consequences

Just honour the couples, that's the point of the game. Stop letting people go to the hideaway with people they're not coupled up with.

Consequences/Drama

Further to the above, there should be consequences for BOTH parties if you sleep with someone you're not coupled up with. Even if you go to the daybeds and your partners know about it, they should be able to say how disrespectful that is to them.

Sneaky kisses always have a way of coming out on the show, so the same thing should be done in the game. It's harder to branch because some players may choose not to kiss anyway, so those people shouldn't be attacked for something they haven't done. But if you kiss someone and your partner finds out and breaks up with you because of it? And the partner of the person you kissed also dumps them? That would be fun!

Female villains

Just stop with the whole thing where one girl constantly gets up in MC's face. Whether it's because the girl is gunning for the same guy or for other reasons, it's so tired and annoying. Or a girl being a bitch for absolutely no reason.

And especially stop making them WOC!

More filler scenes

This has been one of the big complaints over the last few seasons, and that's the lack of filler scenes. There needs to be a balance, obviously, because you don't want too much filler - but this is how we learn about the characters' personalities. Let us be involved in fun chats, give our MC a personality other than "everyone loves me except that one bitch who hates me for no apparent reason," let us chill with the other islanders instead of constantly being involved in drama, eavesdropping on conversations, investigating who slept with who, and doing a million challenges

(Slightly) Longer season

Season 2 is the only deviation from the typical 13-14 "day" season (S1 is technically 7 weeks squeezed into 14 days, later seasons use volumes instead of sticking to a morning/afternoon/evening format but they fit so much into them that they just feel chaotic). Adding a little filler and stretching the seasons out a bit (5-7 volumes seems reasonable?) should make them more enjoyable to play (and replay?)

Cliffhangers

I love cliffhangers (insert joke about all the LIs I like who do rock climbing), but not every episode/volume needs one. It's perfectly fine to find a natural ending to an episode (like going to bed at the end of the night, which was common in S2), and save the cliffhangers for when they really matter

Make the challenges make sense

I didn't play S8 and I'm not playing S9, but I've heard some complaints about the order of challenges - playing Mr & Mrs in Casa Amor, etc. And I saw that today's volume included the Excess Baggage challenge, which is fine, but that one should always be near the beginning

Have the 'get to know people' challenges (kissing challenges, truth/dare, never have I ever) in the first few volumes. Once people are coupled up and relationships are developing, hit 'em with the snogathon to maybe create some drama (and do it when new bombshells have just come in so you get a chance to kiss the new guy). After Casa Amor, you can do Mr & Mrs, any other couple compatibility challenges (or do one of these just before Casa Amor to create some drama just before splitting up the couples), and of course Snog, Marry, Pie.

Have a few of the random obstacle course challenges, food challenges, building tents/sandcastles/whatever challenges interspersed throughout, but make them mean something.

And for the love of donuts, make the challenges in Raunchy Races objective - none of this 'coolest person' or 'hottest person' or whatever, just stick to tallest/shortest/oldest/etc or 'one person must snog the person they fancy the most' or whatever like in S2

Casa Amor

I think CA is a great plot device, but there's a fine line between 'too long' and 'not long enough' that's hard to figure out. But either way, let's stop with the hideaway and sending couples on dates, because nobody's coupled up in CA. Give everyone a chance to get to know everyone. Have a couple guys who aren't interested in MC. If MC is wlw, give some scenes with her LI where they can talk about the future and wanting to couple up when they have a chance, etc.

WLW Routes

I don't do WLW routes in the game so I don't know exactly what the experience is like, but I know that it's not great - carrying on a romance with someone with no consequences but also not being able to couple up with them and sometimes watching them also be carrying on a relationship with whoever they're coupled up with.

I don't have any brilliant solutions, but why not spend every night on the daybeds together until being able to couple up? Why not have two guys who couple up together on these routes, like in S3? Or bring in another character like Sammi in S1 to even out the couples? Or an NB/bisexual character who could couple up with a girl or guy depending on what MC does?

Ultimately, the show and the game are extremely straight-coded, and it's not easy to account for players being able to couple up with female LIs early on, but every option should be explored instead of just doing what they're doing every season.

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Hi!! I absolutely love your fanfics. I was wondering if you could do a Gideon (Gordon) x reader fic that’s kinda angsty to fluff? Maybe the reader and him were close, but he ended up leaving because of how successful G-Man studios was. Then, when Matthew humbled him, he realized that he never should have left?

Awh thank you! For this one, Reader is just replacing Julia more or less

..............

"Are you okay? That looked pretty rough.."

Blinking in surprise, Gordon gazed up at you for a brief moment, seeing the look of concern written all over your face. Yet he didn't have the courage to say anything, as he just sniffled and shook his head, trying to bite back tears.

He thought you were going to make fun of him..just like the rest of this stupid school did after he tried asking out one of the popular girls.

Finally, he had gotten such a burst of confidence, thinking his "fearless" nature was going to score him a date.

But that was all gone now.

He made a damn fool out of himself in front of everyone.

"I think this is yours, Gordon."

Looking back at you, he was shocked to see you kneeling down, the book dusted off and being handed over to him. He quickly snatched it back, cradling it to his chest. "Th-Thanks.." He mumbled. "I'm surprised you even know who I am in all honesty.."

"Well, we do share classes." You mentioned, smiling a little as you both stood up. "You know, they can laugh all they want. But I bet none of those jerks would have the balls to ask her out like you did. I'd say you're truly living up to the "fearless" title."

He was frozen in-place, unsure of what to say as you alluded to his shirt, which he bashfully covered with his oversized coat. When you footsteps walked past him, however, he spun around and saw you going to your locker.

He stumbled after you. "W-Wait!"

"Yeah?"

"You know my name, but I'm afraid yours has slipped by me. What was it again?"

"[Y/n]."

"[Y/n]...well..thank you for the kind words, [y/n]. I wish more people in this stupid school were like you." He tried mustering a smile, although at the moment he seemed self-conscious about his braces. "Would you...l-like to come by my place to study for that test we have tomorrow?"

"...damn it's tomorrow? I was working on a whole flash card set but I kinda fell behind and-"

"Oh I have my own set, too! Maybe we can exchange them and quiz each other!"

"Sounds good." You chuckled, entering your lock combination to grab your notebook. Once you shut the door, you glanced at him, smiling. "I'll catch you after school then, G-Man."

Gordon blinked, jaw-dropped in disbelief as you walked away from him. He just stood there, watching you vanish into the crowd of students on their way to their next class.

A few people whispered and giggled at the way he was staring at you, some even calling him a weirdo or creep.

But this time, he didn't pay them any mind.

You just gave him the coolest nickname ever.

G-Man..

.

.

.

.

"Wait, the G-Man Empire has fallen, you said?"

"Yeah! Don't you ever watch the news? Apparently Matthew Patel is the new CEO!"

"...hah, I figured karma was gonna catch up to that son of a bitch sooner or later."

"Woah, [y/n]..that's kinda harsh. Didn't you go out with that guy and start on it together? I thought you'd be pissed off about it."

"Why would I be pissed off? He pushed me aside when it got successful and claimed he didn't have "time" for a relationship anymore. And it made me think "well shit, maybe it was never a real one to begin with...maybe he saw us as business partners and nothing more"."

"...damn, I didn't know all of that. My bad."

"No, it's..." Pausing, you held the phone away from your ear for a moment, taking a deep breath before you could get too upset. "Look, I'm over it. I'm not glazing over everything I might've done wrong..it was all him. He turned into a rich douchebag."

"Right, and now he's a broke douchebag." Your friend laughed. "Anyways, if I see him on the streets..I'll deck him in the face for ya, alright?"

"Thanks. Maybe I'll do that, too, if I happen to see him.." You joked as well, already feeling a bit better after ending the conversation, hanging up the phone.

With a small sigh, you turned back to the TV and put on some anime episode, relaxing as you focused more on the show and less on the rainstorm outside...

And Gideon.

But unfortunately for you, a name like that was hard to forget.

Especially as you once knew him as that aloof yet sweet nerd who used to hang out with you after school and on the weekends. Most of your days were spent either studying or watching anime while he explained every bit of lore under the sun.

Sure, highschool had its cringy moments, but other times it was great.

Gid--Gordon made up the best parts of it.

He was the first person you ever saw the Sparks(tm) with.

You two were close, graduating and going into college together, and ultimately helping him form the G-Man business from the ground up. He was inspired by that cool nickname you've given him in highschool, assuring you that you deserved all the credit.

At some point, however, he suddenly changed his name..apparently because he felt like "Gordon Goose" was dead to him.

You agreed that being addressed as "Mr. Goose" was one way to ensure he's never taken seriously, so you accepted his name-change to Gideon.

Then...even more about him began to change.

And soon you barely recognized the man you fell in love with.

As soon as he discovered something called "The Glow", his wealth skyrocketed, but he refused to let you in on what this little secret of his was. And he barely gave you his fair share of the earnings anymore.

It wasn't long before you got shoved aside, and he stayed up on his high horse alongside all the other millionaires and billionaires while you worked at your drastically lower-leveled job that was connected to his business empire.

Yep. His empire.

Not yours and his.

He didn't speak to you again unless it was through some random agent.

You were livid for the way he just left you in the dust, and right as you thought you couldn't hate him even more...

He went out with Ramona Flowers, got broken up with, and formed some bizarre group that apparently included her six other "evil" exes.

Oh, how furious you were.

Not at her, though. You felt terrible after she told you about how controlling he was, but it made you wish that you had a time machine so you could go back and warn her NOT to date that prick.

Or better yet..go back and stop him from turning into a prick.

Now according to your friend, Matthew Patel--Ramona's first ex--won the rights to all of Gideon's properties after a tough fight. But oddly enough nobody knew of his current whereabouts.

They emphasized the point that he was kicked out and not killed..

That made you wonder where he is and if he's-

'Wait..why do I suddenly feel sorry for him?' You blinked, before shaking your head and deciding to pause the episode, realizing you weren't even focusing on the story anymore.

Only that jerk.

Okay, so maybe a small part of you did miss him..and hoped that Gordon would come back. But you had a feeling things won't ever change nor return to what they used to be..

Deciding to clear your thoughts, you threw on your coat and opened the front door, stepping out onto your porch. You didn't go any further, as you simply wanted to take in the sights, sounds, and smells of the rain.

Of course it was windy, too, making the air feel chillier than it actually was.

Through the downpour, however, you could make out a figure that was seemingly limping down the sidewalk.

They were barely lit by the streetlamps, but your heart sunk into your stomach the moment you realized who that was exactly..

"G....Gideon..?"

Sure enough, it was him.

Gideon Graves. The rich asshole who now looked as though he was dragged through the mud several times in a row..completely disheveled with bruises on his face and tears in his usually pristine clothes.

Not to mention he seemed utterly defeated.

Upon hearing his name, he stopped and looked over, stunned to see that you were still living on this same street. "[Y/n].."

You scowled, the words you've exchanged with your friend from earlier coming back into your mind. "Oh, how the mighty have fallen."

"Please..don't remind me.." He rasped, his voice sounding so broken and tired.

"I think I will, actually. Now you know how I felt when you kicked me to the curb."

"...I'll admit it..that was a stupid thing for me to do. And I'm sorry.."

Blinking, you were surprised by his sudden apology. But your guard remained up, as you just huffed. "What? Just because you lost your big empire..you finally decide to grovel at my doorstep in the cold rain and apologize? Where was this last year? Two years ago?"

"........"

You sighed. As much as you despised seeing how sad and pathetic he was acting...it did tug on your heartstrings a little bit. You were starting to catch glimpses of that sweet kid you once knew..

"Gordon?"

He perked up. "Yes?"

"...I see. You haven't entirely killed your old self, then.." You quietly mused.

"You were right, [y/n]. I..I-I never should have left you." He took off his glasses as he sniffled and put them in his pocket, shivering. "I don't have any right coming here, but..I used the last of my money to catch a bus. Just to see the one person I still care about...and...hopefully cares for me, too.."

You blinked. "You...still care about me?"

"I know it didn't seem like it, but...I never stopped.." He mumbled. "I got greedy, ambitious...and lost sight of who really loved me. Now I'm back to where I was before.."

"And that is...?"

"..being a loser.." He was even quieter this time around. So much so, you barely heard him at all...although you knew what he said exactly.

"Sorry, what was that?"

"I said...I'm back to being a loser."

You smirked. "One more time?"

"I said I'm a LOSER!!" Gordon snapped, tears finally streaking down his sunken cheeks as he scowled at you. His shout was hoarse, yet pained at the same time. "I-I'm a loser, okay?! A loser who doesn't deserve to grovel at your doorstep like this. A loser who should just lay down and die-''

Then he heard your small laughter and stopped his pity party, sniffling as he stared at you. "Wh-What's so funny?"

"You are a real loser for leaving me...but I'm just as much of a loser for wanting to let you back into my life.." Sighing, you shook your head before you grabbed the umbrella beside your door, opening it and heading down the steps.

He stared at you, now seeing that you two were standing under the umbrella together, totally sheltered from the rain.

Why were you doing this?

You looked at him. "You know, I thought about decking you in the face earlier..but I'll take you admitting you're in the wrong any day. Now let's get out of this rain."

A small whimper left his lips as he shuddered, practically clinging to you while you wrapped an arm around him, leading him back into your house.

In that moment, sparks flew, and Gordon realized he was finally seeing them at their strongest.

[amymbona]

if you need challengers ideas I have A LOT but rn my mind is clouded with some angsty Patrick stuff?

like it could be enemies to lover or fwb but then you get distant cuz you feel like you're falling in love and then patrick just do anything in his power to not lose you, truly anything as long as we get an ANGRY LOVE CONFESSION FROM HIM PLS <333

Honestlyyy this took me like a week to write this and I don't really like it. I feel like this topic could make up for a whole fanfic, not just a one shot. But I hope you'll like it :)

Warnings: angst, cursing,

Word count: 3,2 K

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

You and Patrick were never that close. Mostly, you were Tashi's best friend and he was Art's best friend. There were some shots and awkward hugs shared when Patrick would come to visit his girlfriend and best friend at Stanford, being introduced to one another. At first, you weren't particularly fond of his habits - mainly smoking - and the foul language. But soon, you came to understand his special bond with Art (who you've managed to grow pretty close to as a result of him always hanging out with you and Tashi) and learned to respect him as your best friend's boyfriend. All in all, he turned out to be a pretty chill guy.

Eventually, you'd got to discover what kind of a person Patrick Zweig is. Overly confident and sure of his actions but rolling eyes with offense the second someone questions his choices. Loud, a bit more touchy for your liking and definitely a bit too comfortable sharing his sexual fantasies, but above all, a person driven entirely in the direction where his heart beats.

Initially, Patrick was the person to light the first cigarette between your lips and convince you to have pity for Art's puppy eyes and show him your tits. He had played the role of a perfect matchmaker, for god knows however reason. You two would exchange phone numbers and wish each other merry Christmas a happy birthday. He became your friend. 

After the complete disaster following Tashi's knee injury, the two of you ended up kicked away like two stray dogs, portrayed as the biggest pieces of shit. Patrick, you could understand. Because some time after that, you came to discover he only set you up with Art because he knew that his best friend was after his girlfriend. But in the end, the only person who had the right to yell at him for being such an asshole was you. Not Tashi, nor Art. And you, for reasons still unexplained (perhaps for not abandoning your friendship with Patrick) were tilted a traitor by your former best friend. This was the very end of your four way friendship. 

Fast forward, college was over. You went your way, pursuing your career. Patrick's number remained in your phone and, again, you'd only text each other for important anniversaries. However, all of that changed when he called you one random evening, evidently with too much alcohol running through his veins.

"I miss you." he hiccuped, the distinct chatter on his side of the line making it harder for you to hear what he was saying. 

"Patrick." you sighed, knowing damn well he's simply drunk and thought he must have dialed a wrong number. 

But the ever so persistent individual, he kept talking. "I think about you a lot, y'know, from time to time."

"You're drunk, Patrick." another sigh escaped your pursed lips, gaze focused on applying another coat of red polish to your toenail. "Where are you?" 

"Where the fuck would I be, Y/N? 'm getting wasted." Patrick's words were followed by a fit of laughter, not sure if his own or anyone else's. "Trynna forget about everyone. Not you, though." 

"Not me?"

"Just those two fuckers."

Of course. Ever since the painful split, Patrick had his own way of dealing with things, and that would mainly include getting totally wasted and babbling crap about being so deeply betrayed as if he was Jesus on the cross. 

That night, Patrick ended up at your place, upon you picking him up from the place which was, coincidentally, not too far from your current home. To put it simply, the two of you ended up in the world's messiest and smelliest make out session, Patrick's alcohol breath enveloping you from all directions. It was a vague attempt to get him out of the skinny pair of his jeans that he mistook for you wanting to suck his dick. Almost teary eyed, he begged you to let him fuck you, that it would make everything better for both of you. That it would have been a perfect revenge on Tashi and Art for breaking both of your hearts, even though they would had no way of discovering it. 

To this day, the revenge mindset continues corrupting both of your minds, or perhaps, it just gives you an excuse to keep fucking with each other. Patrick Zweig is a frequent visitor at your apartment, occupying your bed and drinking from your favourite tea cups while spitting some lines along "That nightie looks fucking sexy, but you should take it off," or "I could bend you over that counter." 

Your encounters basically spin around Patrick tearing off whatever you're wearing and covering your whole body with kisses. He whispers surprisingly sweet nothings into your ear while his hands rediscover the curves of your body. He eats you out like there's no tomorrow, making love to your pussy with his mouth. His tongue reaches places, drinking in your sweet nectar and making your back arch and hips grind against his face. He relishes the feeling of your thighs squeezing his head until he's certain his skills might burst soon, and that is all worth it. For Patrick, everything is worth it, if, by the end of it, he gets you to cum all over his face.

"Pat I- 'm close." your voice gets broken mid sentence, hips buckling up to meet Patrick's mouth. 

"Good, baby, good," he coddles, words muffled against your warm skin, tongue circling around your clit as his pointer and middle finger keep pumping in and out. "Just let go honey." 

And you do, moaning his name, hands tightening where they are tangled in his hair. Both of you are on cloud nine - your, from the heavenly orgasm and Patrick, from the sweet delight in your strained voice.

He remains in the bed next to you for a while, holding you and stroking your hair, while the conversation slowly dies. But the moment Patrick attempts to settle under the sheets, you kick him off, insisting on having to get up early in the morning. 

"I don't get it, Y/N," Patrick huffs as he buttons up his pants, eyes roaming up and down over your bare figure while you reach for your nightie. "I make you cum so loud you might wake up the whole street and now you're kicking me out." 

"I'm not kicking you out Patrick." you mumble, sliding into your slippers. 

But Patrick doesn't buy your bullshit. "You are. And it's not the first time you're doing it." 

He seems to see right through you, to know that you're perfectly capable of getting up early and performing your whole morning routine with him occupying your bed. No. There is more to that, much more that you're not telling him. And he wants so bad to have you tell him the truth. 

"You could just let me stay here, y'know. I'm not a thief or something." Patrick continues, a half ironic smile on his face as he moves closer towards you. His hands find place on your hips and he pulls your back into his chest. "You're not afraid of me, are you?" 

Afraid? That is the lightest way to put it. Actually, you are beyond terrified, completely spooked by the idea of opening up to someone who used to be your best friend's boyfriend. To someone who's dick you're taking into your mouth multiple nights per week. And that is exactly where it has to end, that is where you have to set a clear boundary for Patrick to cross.

"Where was I ever afraid of you, Patrick?" you scoff, turning around in Patrick's arms. It almost breaks your heart when you are met with an unusually soft smile on his face, knowing damn well Patrick is interpreting this in a completely different way. 

It's not that you don't want to love Patrick, no, quite the opposite. But you know the two of you wouldn't be able to last. Despite allowing to discover each other's gentle side and showing one another unusual forms of comfort that both of you clearly needed, you two are still so incredibly different.

Patrick Zweig is the epitome of chaos. While he's all heart, he has little to no sense of understanding in some situations that are important to you. In stark contrast to your gentle life, Patrick is reckless and hazards in various ways. Perhaps it fills his need for adrenaline, for being seen by large groups of people and adored for that big bad wolf persona he's built up during his years of tennis. 

You, on the other hand, strive for a more gentle life. After all that you've experienced at your young age, you already feel burnt out, and can't really imagine the idea of shaking your ass at bars and clubs to loud music and getting wasted. What you need is comfort and someone who's on the same emotional level with you. And while Patrick can provide what you need, from time to time, you're afraid it won't be able to last. Hence the cold shoulder. 

"Then why are you pushing me away constantly?" he presses, a small pout on his lips. His gaze drops to your own, desiring to taste you once again. "Can I kiss you?" 

It pains you to refuse him. "Just go." 

Over the next few days, Patrick sends you various messages, even attempts to call you. Your phone keeps beeping and vibrating, but you keep ignoring every single attempt of his, reminding yourself that it's for the better. Patrick will be alright, you're sure of it, he always is. He'll find a new girl - in a pub, on Tinder, anywhere - who he'll fall into and he'll reciprocate his feelings. 

It comes off as a surprise when you bump into him one day in the grocery store, thinking he might be out of the city. After all, he rarely stays there, usually just coming to visit you specifically, staying for the night and then being gone for a few days. 

"Y/N." a small smile tugs onto Patrick's lips as he sees you, eyes roaming over your form and groceries filled arms. "Need some help?" 

"No, no, I'm good." with a shake of your head, you reject his advances and move forward, shoulder mildly bumping into his. Better to keep it simple. 

"What the hell's your deal?" Patrick retorts, immediately moving after you. His voice rises, earning a glance from some people in the aisle, but that doesn't concern him.

You just shrug, an expression of indifference on your face. "Nothing." 

A hand on your arm stops you and you're pulled back against Patrick. He manages to keep himself casual, the touch moving onto your lower back, so as not to draw any suspicion and he even swiftly catches a packaging of toast bread that slips from your hold. "Don't bullshit me, Y/N. You've been ignoring me for like two weeks. That's not like you." 

"I'm not ignoring you." your eyes roll and you snatch the toast bread from his hands. 

"You are, Y/N." he presses, gaze roaming all over your gruff expression. "Can't you just tell me what's wrong?" 

"Nothing's wrong Patrick, my god, just mind your own business." 

You leave him in there, standing in the middle of the aisle, surrounded by strangers and his own miserable thoughts. Poor Patrick is clueless, unable to understand what the hell he has done to you for you to suddenly cross his name out like that.

The calls and messages get even worse, he's sending you one almost every minute there is a phone in his hands, eager for every form of contact. 

Patrick: Y/N

Patrick: c'mon... 

Patrick: don't ignore me bby

Patrick: i miss u

Patrick: ur my only girl

Patrick: ... 

Patrick: i love you

He's an idiot. Probably drunk, you think when you reread the message for the hundredth time during one particular evening, eyes welling in your eyes the longer you stare at it. He surely can't mean it. 

Patrick: fuck

Patrick: ignore that

Patrick: can i call u? 

Patrick: text me pls

Patrick: i wanna see u

Patrick: :(

He's really getting desperate, considering just breaking the door to your apartment and pushing you against the nearest surface, forcing you to listen to whatever he has to tell you. And he actually went to your place, to the apartment you live in, but never went further than standing by the door. Oh, how he wanted to knock each time he was there. How much he wanted to see your face and hear your voice. 

But you never respond, never react, trying to convince yourself you're doing what's best for you both. Perhaps you are naive, a bit too much, and in reality, your treatment only results in hurting both of you. 

And Patrick can't fucking bear it anymore, so he actually musters up all his remaining courage and travels to your place once again. Marching up with determined footsteps, he approaches your apartment and knocks and knocks and knocks on the door until you eventually open it, half asleep.

"Patrick?" 

"Y/N." 

Your swift attempt to close the door ends in vain as Patrick basically pushes himself into your apartment, refusing to be shut down once again. 

"We need to talk." 

"Piss off." you respond with a mumble, voice coming out more hostile than you actually planned. With a shudder, you abandon him, not feeling like facing him at the moment. Because whatever is about to happen, it's bound to end up as a tragedy. 

"Don't you dare talk to me like that." Patrick hisses in an aggrieved manner, following you to the living room. "You owe me at least an explanation." 

You know you do. But you can't bring yourself to give him any. "I don't owe you anything, Patrick." 

"You know damn well that you do. At least look me in the eyes when I'm talking to you." he's genuinely getting pissed off by your attitude. You always used to be so adamant on honesty, believing everyone deserves some form of a gentle treatment, and mainly to be told the truth. In your own words, people don't deserve to just be shut off. But here you are, doing the exact same thing you stand against. 

When you refuse to listen to him, Patrick gets fed up. His hands grab your arms tightly - for the first time not attempting to be cautious or gentle - and just yanks you towards himself. Finally, his eyes meet yours, fully, both of you wearing equally tired expressions. It's no secret this has been tough for both of you. 

"Can you listen to me for once?" he speaks softly, a glimpse of hope, accompanied by a light squeeze of your arms to keep your attention on himself. 

"This is stupid, Patrick." you retort, eyes rolling in an attempt to ignore the sudden closeness of his presence. "Just stop. Go home or go fuck someone. Just go and be happy." 

Patrick's expression drops upon hearing your words, mentally attempting to put one and one together to fully understand what you're attempting to convey. "Why are you pushing me away?" 

His hold on your arms eases, allowing you to slip them out of his hold and step away. Almost on instinct, your palms come up to rub those two spots, not that they're sore or hurt, but you wish to wipe his touch away. "Cause it's better for both of us." 

Finally, you admit to it, wanting to, slowly but surely, erase Patrick from your presence, from your life perhaps, as you've convinced yourself it shall ease the worries of both of you. 

"What the fuck?" he scoffs, stepping closer once again. "How would that be better?" 

"Because we can't continue with this, for fuck's sake. Patrick, we can't just fuck because we feel like it and-" 

"Why not?" 

"What?" 

"Why can't we just fuck?" Patrick insists, approaching you fully. He corners you against the windowsill and rests his hands on it, caging you in. 

You stare him in the eyes, lips parting as you search for an answer. Why couldn't the two of you just fuck? You're both single, no responsibilities and no people to remain loyal to. And you both enjoy the frequency of your encounters, knowing each other's bodies like the backs of your own hands, knowing exactly what the other person loves and despises. Your main priorities are to satisfy the other one, to make sure each one of you feels equally loved and accepted and comfortable in whatever this is. So why can't you just fuck? 

"I wanna fuck you, Y/N." he presses further, leaning into your personal space, so close that the top of his nose brushes against yours. "I wanna fuck you and then I wanna hold you. I don't want you to push me away and just let me stay with you, even when you're all sweaty and messy." 

"Patrick-" 

"Don't. Just listen to me for once and shut up. Stop worrying for a goddamn minute and listen to me, hear me out when I tell you that I want to be with you every second of my life, that I want you in my arms, kissing me, looking at me and paying attention only to me. Not any other man."

"There's no other man." you interfere, eyes flicking between Patrick's to search for any hint of rationality. 

"But there's no me either." he protests, voice raising. Fat from gentle, far from soft, there's not even that playful edge in his voice anymore. There is a hint of something dangerous hidden behind his blue eyes. "And I want there to be. Are you really that stupid to not see that I love you? That I wanna be with you and be your boyfriend? Want you to be my girl?" 

"Patrick, I-" again, you attempt to say something, anything, but no words leave your mouth. Your whole mind is clouded by the sudden confession. He loves you? But... 

It all connects all of a sudden, realising what he messaged you was intentional, was nothing but the sheer truth. All the little signs and hints. All the times he held onto you, clutched your bare body against his and desired to remain buried under the sheets with you. All the pouts and protests when you wouldn't let him stay, when you wouldn't engage in normal couple-ish activities that he wished so hard for. All the subtle touches, on your back, shoulders, face, stroking your cheeks and scratches on your back. These and so much more were visible, at least Patrick thought so. These were the hints Patrick was giving you, desperately hoping you'd pick up on it and notice how smitten he is with you. 

"I love you, Y/N." he whispers, hands grabbing your face, too afraid you're gonna disappear from his grasp if he doesn't hold you tight enough. His thumbs graze your cheeks. "And I need to know if you love me too." 

But do you? Can you afford to love Patrick, the man who was initially your best friend's boyfriend, the man you first fucked out of spite and in symbolic revenge and then found yourself caring too deeply for? Are you willing to be in a messy relationship that would undoubtedly completely alter the direction of your life? 

"I don't know, Patrick." 

"You don't know or you just don't wanna answer?" 

He can see right through you, it's insane. It pains you that you've no idea how to decide, what to say, what to tell him. So you just shudder, attempting to cast a smile and ease Patrick's worries at least somehow. "I don't want us to get hurt."

"We won't." he promises, adamant on keeping it. 

"How can you be so sure about it?" it's obvious you are doubting your possible relationship, knowing what kinds of people the two of you are.

"Because I love you." 

[vermillioncrown]

@rozaceous and I are truly blessed to have you as a reader, @sunshinerotting

(replying to your post “@vermillioncrown 🫡”)

have been thinking abt your porn for like a day these thoughts are still out of order lol: needed to get (thrown) off to get back solid footing. love sex as reassurance + a tool to communicate devotion in a way not traditionally expressed w sex. also of course they were each others’ first fuck. societal ideas about virginity aside and disregarded this really was the only way to get themselves back stable. new and finished facet of their intimacy. been woven together this was just another thread

We're so happy that the purpose of the sex in this outtake was interpreted the way we intended! While Korvin does say "disruption" and articulate his thoughts behind his intent, reassurance and devotion was up to us to convey it through the scene rather than explicit dialogue or narration. It is quite difficult to portray consensual sex outside the dichotomy of romantic love vs lust because no matter what anyone says, even aroaces, we live in a society that socializes us to associate sex with certain ideas.

On average, our trained instinct guides us to those ideas. It's queer to have a different expression, and that different expression also illustrates how disconnected Allie and Korvin are from society due to their circumstances. It's also a very vulnerable act---even if we disregard the emotions (looking at some aroace talk online smh bc it's still an act with regard towards your partner, I should fucking hope, and that's still emotional vulnerability), it's still physically vulnerable. So, yes, we can take "virginity" to be instead first person they let into their shells, past their skin, in the literal sense.

​like he HAD to scatter her to get her to snap back into it and she clearly needed a mark of him inside her like. the creampies were grounding. it’s a metaphor. and also hot. fear i did not pay enough attention to the clothes thing 😔 was too busy thinking “there’s no way these two have fucked anyone before. why are they good at this” which. it was never going to be bad w them. they wouldn’t have let it personal level i found the aspecs boning to be comforting. u guys get it.

He also wants proof he is able to affect her in that he matters to her, he is considered in her choices. She wants proof that he'll trust her, that he won't leave, that his words and actions are aligned, and that she's safe for him. The creampies are everything you say 🤭 Nothing between them, complete trust at the moment and continuing forward, and hah. Oh, you'll love the contrast with the TimKorv outtake 🙂

Don't worry about the clothes thing---it's a pretty deep read. Allie and Korvin are very conscientious about their presentation, because presentation is armor. Tim notices their outfits, that they take things out to dry-cleaning, the difference between the twins' choice of outfits during the Cold War. And, of course, clothes are socioeconomic class signals, which both twins would mind, having a billionaire-in-law and going through Rich Gothamite Hell. They both treat each other's clothes with a lot of care compared to their own as an act of devotion and proof of knowing each other well (barring Korvin's tank top bc Allie was out of patience by then, but their mood was light enough to balance it out).

HAHAHAHA so like, we can't get away with talking about the "skill issue" (lack thereof) without being personal. They're SIs so. Both Roz and I agree (and I have anecdotal proof) that a mindful, solicitous partner that is inexperienced can fare better than a self-centered partner with experience. And we both read a lot of smut (par for the course with fanfic), I have a very vivid kinetic imagination and have done a lot of physical activity requiring fine motor control and body awareness, Roz's livelihood is Knowing Bodies and How They Move. And people should explore themselves and extrapolate from there.

The very high bar is a combination of ^^ the above, their immediate need to reconcile and demonstrate devotion, and their comfort with each other. They knew this was the one and only time---gotta bring the A-game. You're right in that it was never going to be bad with them.

And thank you, it means a lot to us. We want more aspec boning, we want it to be sold, not told to us. Glad you feel that we nailed it.

it IS narratively coherent it makes so much sense for them it’s another threshold to walk through it was a natural move and i love that they’re done with it and it’s comfortable. that’s such a novelty. and her getting the snacks in case he changed his mind. there’s care everywhere there’s intimacy everywhere and we knew that but i could feel the bubble start to reassert itself as soon as they get to the motel. i love when sex isn’t about sex. talking bodies fr. it’s 2 am im defo forgetting smth

For a 2am thought, this is pretty comprehensive. Written sex is rarely about the sex, or it's rarely just about the sex. Obviously, we wanted it hot and sexy but like. Character study. It's a 15k character study.

shower scene was very funny and so was them making fun of dick unprompted. 2 virgins having improbably banger sex. gotta blame batman

That's the thing with neither of them ever suspecting there's another transmigrator. You think you're cheating with prior life experience/knowledge, but the other person is just exceptional like the rest of the batfam, duh. Right? ...?

DPNF from Tim's pov is biased against Dick. The twins love Dick, he's an essential part of their lives, it's an automatic reach to mock him lol.

Oh, final thing with difference between Allie being more hung-up than Korvin over the improbable virgin killing at sex---differences between continued female socialization versus 2.0 male socialization. Allie and her circumstances make her more self-conscious, the whole thing with women always self-monitoring how they are perceived.

Korvin doesn't have female socialization in his second life that ^ guides towards that, but he's very strange for a guy that looks masculine enough because his first life was as a woman, albeit one that existed and was rewarded in predominantly male spaces as an exception. So, he has different hangups which manifests in the rabid squirrel piloting the 6'4" fuccboi currently entertaining you all.

Gender!

[bullet-prooflove]

Why I Write Named Reader Characters...

I’ve had a lot of new folks popping onto my blog and that usually that means this question arises so I thought if I do a post on it and pop it on my pinned page, it saves me writing the whole thing about again every few months.

All of my work is named reader so if that's an issue I'm sorry that's not going to change anytime soon and you are going to run across it more often than not.

I did a poll on it a while back and truly it didn't bother the majority of my readers and honestly, I probably wouldn't change it anyway if it did.

Writing 'reader' content started as an experiment for me because I had always written in 3rd/1st person and I wanted to explore the challenge of writing 2nd person after my degree. I found I really loved writing in 2nd person because it's very immerse and you get the distance that 1st person can't give you and the intimacy that 3rd person can't give you. I think by saying I'm writing OC fic wouldn't really ring true because the first thing that springs to mind when anyone says that is 3rd person writing and that is a whole other kettle of fish. I don't view what I do as OC fic, it's just the reader is the character. They are stepping into the character's shoes.

People enjoy my writing because of the way I write characters and that includes reader characters. One of my most popular couples is Beau Simpson x Reader (Ally). - Ally's name is used a lot throughout the work and people love her and her personality because of the relationship it shapes with Beau. If she was written as Y/N it would be a very boring and different story because the choices she/they made shape the writing. Writing her as a 'reader' gives the people who enjoy my work that proximity to Beau whilst exploring concepts and issues they can feel and identify with but it also provides a certain level of distance so the content isn't too heavy or stifling.

I despise (and I know this is a strong word.) writing Y/N because I feel it makes the work bland. You can't make a character out of Y/N because you can't include details like their perfume (what if it's not the reader's preference) or hobbies (what if the reader doesn't sew) or personality (what if the reader is more extrovert then introvert or vice versa) or even songs (what if the reader isn't a Johnny Cash fan) You have to make it generic so it's one size fits all and I find that too lackluster and confining. If I was truly writing a 'Y/N' character it would suck for me and my readers because all the personality and little details that bring a character to life and their relationship with the person I'm writing about wouldn't be in there. If you don't have a character in mind how would you know how they respond in certain situations or to things their lover does or says. The work becomes very generic. You'll end up reading/writing the same thing over and over again.

For me it's those details that make the work sing and part of that detail is names. Sometimes you have to use a name for it to make the impact that you want and that's why I do it.

"Y/N don't go..." doesn't have the same weight and impact as "Ally, please just don't leave." < the name shapes the language and the sentence structure. (I honestly was trying to write 'Ally don't go' but this characterisation took over, which proves exactly what I'm saying.)

WOW this has been a long one, sorry guys and welcome to my TED Talk on the way and whys of how I write.

If you don't like it, that's cool don't read. If you do great, I'll see you on board the good ship 'HMS Fanfic' *salute

[okamiz36]

MORI IS NOT A PEDO. DAZAI IS NOT A WOMANIZER OR 2D. A rant about the BSD universe, characters, and fanfic writers and how people mischaracterize the MCs

SPOILERS FOR THE BOOK NO LONGER HUMAN

Ok so, for those of who don't know in BUNGOSTRAYDOGS ANIME each main character was based off an actual writer and the character's came to be a blend of the universe/anime mixed with the novelist's books. For example, Dazai Osmau wrote the book No Longer Human which explains the tale of a man who had been acting his entire life, struggles with depression, fitting into society and eventually at the end comes out as gay (shoutout to the soukou shippers because this practically confirms the ship is canon). It shows how Dazai is more then a womenizer and comedian whereas in the anime we just take the character at surface level.

I'm a fanfic reader, I enjoy alot of different stories and right now I'm reading StrayBoundIsakai on AO3, amazing fanfic to some extent. I love it and whatnot but they included some notes on NaomiXTanizaki, and like a true fan I've done a bit of reasearch on the books written by the characters (I read crime and punishment+No longer human because those are my favs plus another Dostoyevsky book I can't remember the name of) So y'know it annoyed me to see people claiming that Tanizaki and Naomi are an actual incest couple because they are not. Here's my theory, Tanizaki n Naomi arent real siblings, in the book Naomi by Tanizaki two lovers have to pretend to be siblings to hide from a man who I'm pretty sure forced Naomi into a relationship with him, ill read the book prob tmrw if i got time, and its a common theroy that Naomi in bsd isnt even real, shes a hallucination ofa dead girl made by light snow ability. So one or the other.

We don't have any confirmation as to pretty much any of the BSD characters so we don't know the details between Tanizaki and Naomi as they've been kept secret. BSD is an odd anime because it goes from silly detective to vampire outbreak, to Fyodor is god, but within layers there are so many hidden clues on what the real story is.

Dazai is a tricky one for me because i've read so many theories on him but my favorite is why he abuses Akutagawa. Dazai is abusive to Akutagawa bc if he isnt and praises aku then aku loses his reason to lvie and be better then he alreayd is, akutagawa needs to be told he's a failure, dazais nice to atsushi bc atsushi is already so far broken if he doesn't get praise he'll go insane and suicide or smth similar. Dazai's character and entire personality is within the book no longer human (amazing read would recommend but it will mess you up) people often call him a womanizer but it's him simply trying to fake a personality as to what he deems is the most likeable persona or sterotypical persona. He's not annoying, his entire personality is a facade in which he's just trying to be likeable because he has no clue how he's suppose to act. In the PM/dark era/15 dazai he acted cold and ruthless because that was what was to be expected of him. Dazai has no personality, he's a pathological manipulator, YALL PLEASE READ NO LONGER HUMAN IF YOU ARE A DAZAI FAN.

And then Mori... PEOPLE PLEASE STOP SAYING HE'S A PEDOFILE. I'm going to take context from a reddit thread and the link will be posted because the post I'm quoting omg is amazing helped me so much, "Elise is the character of a short story by Mori, "The Dancing Girl" [a japanese student in Germany falls in love with a 17yo local girl who was poor and danced for a living, they have a complicated relationship until the guy chooses Japanese Moral Integrity over Love and goes back home. The girl realizes she was pregnant and goes mad, the student finds out and has painful regrets because he wanted a child/family and truly loved the girl" "In "The Dancing Girl", in the end the girl was pregnant with the student's child. Could BSD Elise herself be that child? Well, I don't very much believe this actually (imo BSD Mori and Elise don't have a father-daughter kind of relationship, I will elaborate), but anyway it's something that popped up in my mind. 2) I'm sure I read this somewhere, though I can't remember the source rn, that RL Mori himself said that his sexuality is "like that of a child", meaning that he does not really feel sexual attraction but he understands love and affection, and he stated that he loved his wife and children. So, my personal opinion is that Elise could be just that part of him. That's why it's shaped like a child. (+ Little side note idk if it's something worth mentioning but Elise has blue eyes, blonde hair, western outfit... Is she European? Given RL Mori's literary tastes I mentioned at the start, Asagiri might have chosen this specific design on purpose?).  Anyway that brings me to my next point: What is Mori and Elise's relationship in BSD? Like I was saying, Elise is literally a part of Mori, so she is Mori himself, his preferences, the influences he had, etc. He loves and cares for her because he loves and cares for himself. After all, Mori is not shown being "affectionate" towards other kids: there were Q and Kyōka right there but Mori never showed interest in them if not to exploit their abilities. So is BSD Mori a pedo yes or no?? Here we are. I think BSD Mori might be asexual (as for RL Mori, he probably was, but we'll never really know, also who knew about asexuality in 1800-1900s lol). That said, the character is never shown feeling sexual attraction (and reminder that pedophile means sexually attracted to children, y'all say this word so lightly smh). But Mori really says a lot of inappropriate stuff, doesn't he? Fukuzawa was shocked and Elise picks on him. But what if the shtick is that he just doesn't realize that he appears sus to others, exactly because anything he does isn't intended as sexual in his pov? He's a criminal mastermind but he also probably thinks dressing up Elise is like dressing up a doll and saying she's his wife is like playing house."

Asagiri prob just made him seem creepy because guess what HE'S A MAFIA BOSS LIKE WHAT DO YOU EXPECT?! Link is here please read: reddit.com/r/BungouStrayDogs/comments/17zes5z/vita_sexualis/

Reading or watching videos of recaps on the BSD writers made me hate so many fanfics honestly.... I shared all of these thoughts with my friend @kreepyveebs because they wanted to makea Ranpo fanfic and I figured I should also make a post on this.

I'm going to link a channel who made videos on Dostoyevsky's books just because it helps clearify what Fyodor is even talking about/explaining in the books, it's also a psychology channel so I recommend just binge watchin this guy https://www.youtube.com/@unsolicitedadvice9198

Can writers and theorists also please start figuring out what made Kunikida have his ideals, or made Ranpo the way he is? Ranpo wrote black lizards so me and Kreepy have made the theory of he had mafia parents or somehting similar, maybe related to Hiroshi? (im pretty sure i got his name wrong- ack), stop focusing on just the mains, like jeez.

SHOUTOUT TO @kreepyveebs (second ping mwahhaha) THEYRE AN AMAZING ARTIST AND WRITER AND YOU SHOULD 100% FOLLOW THEM IF YOU SEE THIS POST.

oh yeah @unknowntalesbymiles you should enjoy this post so ping for you!

[ami700]

ATTENTION, PLEASE:

Guys, I'm here talking only about ships in League of legends. Because Riot changes the lore constantly. I'm not talking about ships from anime or any other shows that are not official, it's okay. I don't mind other ships or even care about them. I'm only talking about shippers in lol fandom, because they can become official any time, if Riot decided, of course.

Please, I beg you, I beg you, stop making ships like Jhin x Hwei, or Sett x Aphelios!! Stop!! I don't mind there being people who support gays or even the existence of lgbt, I swear I don't care. It's okay, I have nothing to do with you, I don't care at all, but I hate seeing this filth in my favorite shows, whether they are games, anime, cartoons, or manga. I swear I don't care about your existence, live your life the way you want, I don't mind. But stop making such ships.

Twisted Fate x Graves were never an official ship, nor were Leona x Diana, nor even Vi x Caitlyn, but because of you, because of your imagination in fanfics and encouragement, those ships became official. Everyone knows that Riot is constantly changing Champions' stories, especially if it has a huge number of fans and support. Because of you, the ships like Aphelios x Sett or Jhin x Hwei may become official. I don't want to see this hell in League of Legends. Please, that's enough. My childhood was truly destroyed when I knew about Korra and Asami's relationship in Avatar, my psyche was completely destroyed.

It's true that I sometimes watch some fan art about Gojo x Geto (I actually stopped lately, because this was starting to get on my nerves), that doesn't mean I want it to be official. Because of you, I almost believed they were gays, but that's definitely not the case.

I know, my opinion is not popular, but I have the right to say what I think, don't I? I do.

I'm starting to get more irritated as time goes on. This is disgusting, to see the champions I love so much turn into gays. I love Aphelios, Sett, and even Jhin, but oh my God, how I hate this feeling of fear of what is coming. I don't know what might happen in the future, or what decisions Riot might make in the future. Stop, just stop. We already get that you like seeing Aphelios and Sett as a gay couple, we get it.

I can't imagine my favorite game turning into a gay hell.

I don't care if those people exist in reality, but it's so hard to handle seeing such things in my favorite shows.

And, I have a question, guys.

If we look at all this from your point of view, you're saying that it's impossible to have a nice, platonic, cohesive friendship between two men, right? This is what I see personally. Every two male or female friends are shipped. Why? In your opinion, is it impossible to have a relationship other than romantic? Can't they be friends?

ATTENTION:

If you don't like this "****", don't read it. Don't comment. Don't say a word to me. Just leave. You can't make me change my mind. You can think of me as a homophobic. You can hate me. You can feel disgusted by me. It's all your choice. But, don't post useless comments about me, because I'm done being around people who hate me and argue with me for a simple post where I didn't offend anyone. Can't I even have the right to explain my opinion? Difference is normal, you don't like it? Leave. Just leave.

[gynnnicsworld]

Hellooo! i was wondering what your all-time favorite hurt/comfort fics are? also I love your account, I scrolled through not too long ago and immediately was like yes, I've found my people

*screams internally* oOH GOD, thank you for asking that, I've been waiting for someone to ask that and I'm so glad this is happening! OK.

From what I can see in your profile picture, do u like spn too? Do u have any favorite couples there? cause I have a long list of fics in that fandom too *wink wink*....

Please ask me questions to recommend fics, because I have been trying for weeks to organize a part 2 of rec list but I haven't been able to, I have too many fics and I have no idea how to start organizing them. So by asking questions like these you help me recommend some fics and get organized. thks u <3ily

Life's (Kate's) a bitch and then you (she) dies

by: Littleredridinghunter

While everyone is busy saving Jackson, Stiles is taking a beating in the Argent's basement. When his dad gets hurt, he leaves a note for Scott that he is getting away from everything and to never contact him again.

Too bad Scott and the pack take him at his word....

One year later and they finally see Stiles again but it isn't a happy reunion. Can they repair all the damage that has been caused in their time apart?

(This is one of the most recent fics I've read and it left me completely destroyed and in love at the same time, the author of this fic is the same author of most of my favorite fics. Anyway, all the fics I've read by this author will appear here. (oh by the way you would like to know that spn characters appear here.))

Home

by: TheTypewriterGirl

God, this fic is BEAUTIFUL, it's glorious, this fic can basically be described with any adjective that refers to beauty and perfection. But there is pain, a lot of pain, this fic must be praised.

There are illustrations that complete the beauty of this fic. Like this↓

Yes, you guys definitely have to read this fanfic.

You haven't read it??? WHAT ARE YOU EXPECTING?? RUN TO READ IT.

I downloaded the fic because I don't want to lose it, I would cry if one day this fic is deleted.

It's all part of the master plan - Sterek version

by: Littleredridinghunter

every fic that I put here you must read it, truly and seriously, you HAVE to read it, you can't not do it.

Sense of Home

by: siny

Home can be a place, but it can also be a person.

After the events with the Nemeton, Stiles starts suffering the consequences of their sacrifice. A journey he attempts to make on his own, but only becomes worse with every step he takes. In the process he seeks comfort in an unexpected place and it draws him toward an unexpected person.

(This fic explains one of the theories quite well, maybe you know this theory x if that theory caught your attention, you will love this fic).

hold me tight (you'll be alright)

by: orphan_account

Stiles is captured by the alpha pack for over a month before escaping. Derek finds him in the woods and takes him home.

Homeland

kitkatpancakestack

"And if you bleed for Beacon Hills once, you can be sure you'll bleed for it again."

(Tthis is a fix fic, but it's really good. I actually have many VERY good ones of this type.

God, I actually have a colossal mountain of fics to recommend and I have no idea how to start organizing them.)

It's where my demons hide

by: Littleredridinghunter

Stiles was used to his life going to hell. He'd just never expected it to be quite so literal.

When Rafael McCall returns to Beacon Hills after a five year absence it brings back lots of unhappy memories for Stiles, he'll do whatever he can to keep his secrets buried in order to protect those closest to him.

With Rafael's return Stiles discovers that secrets are always revealed, even if this particular time it's because of supernatural interference.

(By the way, I don't have an order, because all the fics that I'm putting here are really good and all of them are my favorites. BUT this fic right here is probably my favorite among favorites, this fic has a way of destroying your soul and putting it back together that you will love and hate at the same time and leave you wanting to read more.)

A Melody That Climbs And Then Falls

BY: siny

They won the fight against the alpha pack; the nightmare was apparently over.

That was until Stiles fell on the ground with blood coming out of his mouth when Derek reached him.

--

Or the fic where Stiles gets an internal bleeding for saving Derek, only a tragedy like this would make Derek realize his true feelings.

Peter betrayed them all and is currently missing. Allison and Stiles are buddies, as much as Derek and Erica.

Can't rely on me

By; Littleredridinghunter

Set at the end of season 2, Gerard beats Stiles up, but it's a lot worse than anyone knows.

The pack let him down, that's not really a surprise lately.

When Danny finds Stiles nearly bleeding to death the next day it's the start of a beautiful friendship.

Can the pack make amends before it's too late? Will Stiles ever forgive them for not being there for him when he needed them the most?

Echoes

by: jjmash

Stiles' magic accidentally creates a lifelike echo of Derek's baby sister who died in the Hale fire. Between games of tag and trips to the zoo, Derek helps Stiles pick up the pieces of himself post-Nogitsune possession.

(This one is short but sweet and sad.)

Finding His Home

by: OKDeanna

Derek Hale was a lot of things, and none of them very good. Yet, the one thing he couldn't shake was the one thing he knew he shouldn't want. But when an unexpected late night call reveals Stiles Stilinski has been injured, he will stop at nothing to get to him. Even if it means opening himself up in ways he never has before...

(I love that in the sterek fandom we have these unspoken truths, like the fact that we all know that no matter what, Derek is always going to believe and care about Stiles whether he's in Mexico or on the other side of the world, if Stiles calls, he'll go to Stiles.)

Wait For Me

by: Hedwig221b

“Stiles, we know about your Spark,” Scott looked at Stiles with desperate eyes, trying to convey something. “He is the Werewolf who's been chasing you. You must run. We’ll help you…”

Stiles stared at his friend, genuinely concerned for his sanity, because the nonsense he was sputtering was really fucking confusing.

This one is really good but fucking confusing or something, it really made me hate certain characters here and scream in frustration but I always trusted stiles/derek.

The Moon's Gonna Follow Me Home

turningterrific

Derek doesn’t want to call the window repair guy. He doesn’t want to sweep up the glass. He’ll inevitably miss a few shards and pull them out of the bottom of his bare feet for weeks.

He doesn’t want to try to make this place feel like home when it isn’t.

Derek stayed in Beacon Hills and tried to make it work because he wanted pack, wanted purpose. He gave his best effort and found himself back where he started: alone, with a few begrudging allies. He’s tired, and even though his werewolf body heals quickly, he feels the weary ache down to his center.

He packs his car with the few things he cares about enough to drag them from place to place. He locks the loft and calls a realtor about listing the building he’d bought in a misguided attempt to secure a future.

And then he leaves.

(This fic will always be in my favorite fic recommendations, because I read it at a difficult time for me and it helped me a lot emotionally to move forward, so yes, this fic is one of my favorites among favorites, and I will always mention it at every opportunity. Plus we have Derek healing and that's beautiful because Derek deserves nice things just like Stiles.)

____________________________________

okay, I'm going to stop here because I have some things to do, but actually I have more favorite hurt/comfort fics. But I won't be able to put them all here right now, apologies for that, but please send me another question for a second part, but I think at the moment you have several fics to read.

I hope you like them, and please do not hesitate to send me messages to talk about all these incredible fanfics, I will be waiting for your comments. (and thanks again for the question)

[lizzaneia-elizalde]

Yandere! Vaniteas

I was on a horrible writer's block but here I am, writing fanfic. This is for a special person who yeeted me out of my creative slump LMAO

If you don't know who Vaniteas is, he's a vtuber I follow! A lot of things happened and i'm now writing a fic bout him lol. This is just going to be a short fic... But then you guys know what short is for me :D

An alternative Universe where a Demigod is now living in the modern era as a streamer, turns out has a past he could never take out.

He's an insane man.

Here he is, looking at the screen blink and blur for about ten times before sighing.

He's been streaming for 6 hours at this point. And the fact that he streams 2 hours on the regular, this was a bit of an eye strain at this point.

But he can't. Not yet.

His fingers danced across the keyboards as he tried to defeat Blackgaol Knight in the DLC, trying so hard to defeat the boss but he's about to slam the keyboard from frustration.

Doing an endurance stream while drunk isn't a good idea. But here he is, losing his mind while looking at a screen that almost swam from the lack of other stimulation other than this... Damned game.

Who knew doing a "Every defeat is a drink" stream will be the death of him? Not him, that's for sure.

He taps his finger on the desk, wondering what will happen next after this stream. His eyes flickered to the chat, and saw his regulars beefing on god knows what in the chatbox.

Then, out of nowhere, a raid happened.

He scrambled up, trying to straighten himself and be a bit more sober to greet the people who are now spamming their raid message. The raider, a friend of his, brought new viewers and old to his stream.

"Oh! Thank you for the raid..."

His heart stopped.

Was his eyes still being affected by the liquor, or is he actually seeing things?

An entry. Just the same raid message that he usually sees whenever his friend raids his stream. But the username that accompanied that message was someone he would never, ever forget.

Surely, it was just a coincidence? It was not you. It's impossible. It's been what, over 500 years since he last saw you?

Yeah, just a coincidence, he thought.

Because if it wasn't, he doesn't know what to do.

"Vani! Come on!"

"Wait up!"

A field filled with lush green grass that stretched out of the horizon, a lone cottage in the middle with a stream flowing down from the forest, the wind cold yet comforting, and the sky blue untainted.

It was the picture perfect scene for a picnic.

Vani juggled to balance the picnic basket in his arms, but his lips were stretched to a soft smile as he watched you dance and prance around the field.

This demigod was in love.

At first, it was just a simple curiosity. After all, with you being a witch finding a god to worship was a rare occurrence nowadays. Higher beings like him are trying to find worshippers just to ease their boredom.

So, he decided to bless you a bit. And that was supposed to be all of it.

But why? The fates were playful that day and struck him with a slow burn effect of the cupid's bow. And now, he's hopelessly enamored with your whole existence.

Your delighted face when you looked up at him sent his heart racing a bit. It was truly something he hadn't seen before, even with his previous worshippers.

His relationship with you was promptly a give or take. You do a ritual, he grants you powers to do simple tasks like fire bending to light up torches, cook, or even bless up your luck.

It was not until you laid there, one night on your bed, talking to the air as if talking to him.

"My Lord, why do you think the people hate witchcraft?" You asked, your face pale. "I didn't know I would be kicked out like that two months ago. What about my family? I don't..."

With a sigh, you turned to your side to weep your life that could have been.

His heart ached for you.

Yes, that was one of the reasons why people rarely worship them anymore. The act of witchcraft renders these witches burnt at the stake. Even to those who are not witches, if they were deemed too smart for the people, then they will face the wrath of the fire.

The same fire that Vani nurtures.

"It's unfortunate."

You scrambled up when you heard a voice seep into your mind. It was deep, a bit boyish yet mature.

"H-hello?"

That voice chuckled.

"Hi."

Things escalated quickly at that. You, who was lonely in the small cottage in the middle of the field, now has a friend. Weirdly enough, it's the god you worship and do rituals for.

It didn't take much long for a relationship to nurture when he starts showing up in front of you.

Everyday was filled with laughter, innocence, a budding relationship blossoming from a dire situation. His heart never beats this fast for another being, let alone a human or a worshipper, but here you are. Defying those same principles he held dear.

It was bliss, not until the other gods got hold of his... Escapades.

Things went downhill after that.

They said it was purely coincidence, but Vani swore it wasn't.

A person from a nearby village snooped you out, and has accused you of being a witch.

The worst part is, Vani was away since the gods decided to talk about him and this weird relationship he had with you.

The gods swore they were just scared for Vani.

But Vani never felt fear, until he let out harrowing screams with his fellow gods holding him back from trying to stop the people burning you at the stake.

The fire was angry. Deep harboring rage licked at your skin as you screamed out in pain. Screamed out his name in pain.

You wanted nothing more but to live peacefully.

"NO!"

Your body, which was once whole and filled with love he gave you, is now a pile of ashes and bones.

And as if nothing happened, the people scattered and went on with their lives.

Scrambling to his feet, he ran towards the stake and knelt at your ashes, desperately grabbing as much as he can and hugging it to his body to feel your warmth. But the warmth he felt was the remaining fire that burnt his skin. But he doesn't care. All he wants is you back again, in his arms, as he whispers his confession to you.

He failed to protect you.

Fate was cruel indeed. 300 years after that incident, another god fell in love with a human. And the others accepted it and decided to welcome this change.

But why only then? Where was their compassion when you were burnt in front of him? Where's the welcoming arms that this couple received when you were in Vani's arms, nothing but bones?

He deeply resented them at that time. And still do but in secret.

He shook his head to focus when he realized that the people were asking in chat if he's okay.

"Oh i'm fine! Don't worry. Something just came up." A smooth lie, he smiles to his audiences and decided to welcome everyone.

"... And hello, y/nTheWitch."

His voice was merely a whisper in the wind when he said that. After all, his heart was beating out of his chest when the familiar formation of the tongue and lips moved to blurt out your name.

A chat from you popped up on his screen and he almost wept then and there.

y/nTheWitch: Hi! I saw your name and was curious since you sound so familiar... I don't know where I heard it though, it's my first time seeing a vtuber.

y/nTheWitch: It's like a sense of deja vu, lol

Vani smiled bitterly. It must be you then, it's impossible that it's not you at all.

"Really? I think I heard of you too. You sound really familiar, and I also kind of have that sense of deja vu. Maybe we knew each other in our past life?" Vani joked, and the chat erupted in jeers thinking it was a pick up line.

It kind of was, but not the intention, really.

He can feel it. The connection with you that was once dull is now a weird numb ache in his meridians. You were alive again, and he hopes that it's you in the chat.

He hopes that it was truly, really you.

So that his past guilt of not protecting you will be lifted.

And the guilt of burning down the whole village who burnt you will also be lifted.

Countless of ashes and bones were scattered in your name.

And he's determined to not let that sacrifice in vain.

"I hope I'll see you next time I stream, y/n."

[cinnbar-bun]

Important Message

So... haha... been almost a month since I really did anything on this blog...

Listen, I'm gonna keep it straight to you guys, the months leading up to my hiatus were, to put it mildly, some of the most disgusting I've seen in my years as a fanfic writer and fandom enjoyer. This is a bit of a vent post, because, well, genuinely, I really hope the fandom can get better. I'm assuming most of the bad experiences I've had came through people a bit younger/newer to fandom or tumblr/fanfic culture in general. If you want just an update on the blog, I will be posting that shortly after this one.

I'm going to list out some of the shit I had to go through (that I am sure many fanfic writers, but more specifically, POC fandom creators go through). This is a long post. Yeah, also, this is obvious but TW FOR: Racism (including slurs), Islamaphobia, sexism, death threats, suicide threats, harassment, and just flat out horrible behavior.

I'm gonna go list some of the slurs I've been messaged or called, I'll even rate them for you guys <3:

Camel jockey: oooo, haven't heard that one before. get more creative, 3/10

camel fucker: nice, bit more crass, still not original. 3.5/10, just a bit funny

Terrorist: wow, dude, oh my gosh, I can't believe I've never heard that one living in post 9/11 America! Wow! 0/10 try harder

I also don't know where the assumption came from that I was a hijabi... I am not. Calling me a BMO? Pretty unique but sadly does not fit me. :(/10

This barely scratches the surface of what I have dealt with after having been open about my heritage. I'm sorry my very existence offends you and requires you to come out and send me shit about hoping my family dies or that my favorite character brutally hurts me. I have read your messages, and after long consideration, I have decided to no longer be Middle Eastern. Yep, that's right, guys, I am no longer MENA! Don't worry about my family history or anything, I just choose not to be that anymore. There, now you don't have to send me messages about hoping my family gets killed <3

Let's see what else we should tackle.

Should I tackle the fact that I've gotten messages from others to update a fic or answer a request or they will try to self harm or commit suicide?

Should I tackle the fact that some have tried to pressure or guess my sexuality (dude, what the fuck)?

Should I tackle how I got messages from others assuming my place because of my religion?

Should I tackle how I've gotten weird ass messages from people getting mad at me because how DARE I not write certain things during Ramadan?

Should I tackle those things?

I'll save you the hassle, no, I really shouldn't have had to, but fact is, the One Piece fandom has to be some of the worst I've seen and interacted with purposefully in a long time. And I was in the Hetalia fandom way back when. I should not have dumb shit about "liberating" me or oh, oh, oh, I love this one! People asking me if I have 'full armament haki' (I hope you genuinely, genuinely, get the fuck off your phone and go outside. Maybe have a walk and go talk to actual people.)

I've met some genuinely lovely, beautiful, and kind people. They truly are some of the most talented creators I've seen, and I'm grateful they chose to befriend me. The good does outweigh the bad. But the bad? Oh lord, I think you guys are genuinely some of the most disgusting pieces of shits I've ever had the displeasure of meeting.

Fanfic writers are not your slaves. I have a full time job, I have a full time life outside of my tumblr and my writing. I write when I want to because I like to write, and fanfic is a good creative outlet. You sending dumb messages crying about no updates after four days of me posting a new chapter, or threatening to harm yourself because of this is disgusting.

POC creators, especially, are not your fucking tokens. I'm not here to break down every racial stereotype for you. I'm not here to be sitting there mocked with crap I already hear in my outside life. And I sure as HELL am not here for fake support only to be called slurs and mocked the minute I don't do something for you. You are gross, you are not funny, you are genuinely a horrible person and if your ideal vision of humor boils down to the Instagram comments section, all I'm saying is, I'm not wishing you anything positive.

If you read this far, thank you. Truly. This was difficult to place and write down, but it needed to be said, because even to this day I still get messages similar to before.

Do better, One Piece fandom. Do better. Because you are only going to lose the fans who really care and who put effort into making things. How far can you harass fanfic creators, and especially POC ones, with your bullshit before you lose out on things?

I don't need to 'move on'. My identity and my existence is on a completely separate wave than so and so idk, liking a ship or a character. One is fake, and one is literally who I am. Putting false equivalencies to the issues within fandom because it makes you 'sad' is shitty.

I've only given you an idea of what I had to deal with. Now imagine this constantly by random people, both on tumblr and AO3, and then imagine that also in your daily life, on the media, in the news, in the music, on the radio, in the books- fucking everywhere. It's exhausting.

Just... fucking do better. Actually fucking listen to POC. I got nothing else to add that wouldn't just be me repeating the same shit I and others have tried to say.

Just be kind, for gods sake, and remember that creators are human, not the silly avatars we choose.

[charmwasjess]

Thoughts about Dooku and Sifo Dyas in the imperial era? Like if they role-swapped with Cal Kestis' or something?

Oh, this is SUCH a fun ask, thank you. :D 

Dooku in an Imperial world. It seems like it would be so tasty, but I might be getting too distracted picturing him in those slutty little uniforms. 

The problem I see is that Dooku by RotS seemed so genuinely fucked up to me, to the point of being almost incapable of thriving in an Imperial world. Legends does a great job depicting his absolutely crumbling mental and emotional state, a man who loses track of his own POV and replaces it with Sidious’s in the middle of a book he’s narrating, but I think even in the relatively sparser depictions of him during that time in current canon, the cracks show. He’s not scheming against either Palpatine or the Jedi effectively, he seems like he’s losing control of his own kingdom of lies, his final (?) Clone Wars appearance with the ritual to psychic-attack Yoda, he seems downright fucking miserable the whole time. He’s like just sitting in a room dissociating when Sidious calls to tell him he’ll need his blood for this ritual, and you can fucking HEAR his sigh. 

Beyond his emotional and mental state, I don't feel like we have a clear idea of what Dooku thought his own end game for after the war. Stover’s batshit “honorable retirement in Sidious’s wonderful new Empire” smells a little off to me and I think the RotS novel got decanonized? I could see him wanting to take over training of the Inquisitors - fuck, he’s been trying to do that with his Sith apprentices for ages - but really, is Sidious going to let him anywhere near that project? Somehow, I don't think so.

I think Dooku ends up quite like he himself daydreams about in Yoda: Dark Rendezvous:

I don’t see a depressed, lightning-cooked shell of himself doing particularly well or lasting long in a cutthroat Imperial command structure. Vader was groomed for the role for years and still is shown struggling with his position in the OT. 

Of course, it’s much more fun to picture him coming to his senses, realizing Sidious’s bullshit, and joining the fight against the Empire in some kind of personal vendetta against the man who convinced him to destroy everything he loved and then planned to dump him, but… I don’t know. Dooku seems broken and defeated to me at the end, and coming to his senses about everything he gave up to get to that rock bottom, I think would completely collapse him as a person. I’m trying to do something like this in my fic The Thunder Answered Back, which... perhaps tellingly... hasn't been updated in a year because Dooku just keeps lying down on the floor. 

Sifo-Dyas is much more interesting and likely to my mind, because he’s essentially been preparing his whole life for this moment. The Living Force has him by the end of his life being able to use his precognition effectively enough that the Council is using it as a tool, presumably that would be a huge advantage in staying one step ahead of Imperial raids and Inquisitors. He’s also a Jedi Master, former High Councilmember, trained by a High Republic era Jedi Master himself. He represents a huge amount of generational knowledge of the Jedi Order.

@dapurinthos had a FANTASTIC Sifo-Dyas on the Path AU post reply somewhere that I wish I could find because they are smarter and funnier than me and it was truly perfect. In summation: yes, Sifo-Dyas is a huge pain in the ass for the Empire. Boinking Inquisitors on the head features strongly.

Now. Fanfic nonsense it? Swap in younger idealist Dooku and his seer bestie Sifo-Dyas into a Cal Kestis scenario? Two brave fated young Padawans against the Empire? No. They die the first day. Going off just the first part of Dooku: Jedi Lost, those two idiots lost a fight with: a bookshelf, each other, literally some bacta, a hallucination (several times), Dooku’s dad, moss… and that’s just going off the top of my head.

Sorry guys. They get crushed in one of those scary doors in like the first two seconds.

[watercolor-hearts]

Thank you to @rednyx-sf for tagging me in this, it wasn't an easy list but I really liked making it. 😊

Pairing/Shippy list!

Here are the rules:

1. List your top seven ships.

2. Put them all in order for your love for them; 7 to 1, 1 being your favourite.

3. Name the fandom.

4. Put a picture of the guys in question.

-

(There will be a few FE ships too but I didn't count them as individuals, I just put them as a second ship to certain numbers.)

7. Simi | Sebastian Vettel/Kimi Räikkönen [Formula 1]

I would like to apologise to all of my Simi fan followers for this. 😃

I love Simi, they're my comfort pairing when it comes to reading (and writing) but to be honest I prefer ships that are still active, have new content etc. and not only old pictures, videos etc. So yeah, this is the reason why they're seventh for me.

6. Galex | George Russell/Alex Albon [Formula 1]

I don't really know what to add to this. I just like them. ❤ (Also, for me they're the most difficult to write because they have a personality that's (for me) very difficult to portray right.)

Also, funfact, I don't really like the popular Galex fanfics. This is the ship where I prefer the reality and my imagination, and not the fanfics.

5. Dando | Daniel Ricciardo/Lando Norris [Formula 1]

Dando was THE hurt/comfort ship for me last season. This photo of them is in my top3 favorite Formula 1 related photos.

I have a very strange relationship with Lando but I loved them together. ❤

4. Sam/Mitch | Sam Bird/Mitch Evans [Formula E]

Do I need to add more? I don't think so. Cock hug and lovely lifting is all I neeed. They were insane for this. ❤

4. Carlando | Carlos Sainz Jr./Lando Norris [Formula 1]

Again, can't really add anything, I just like them. I like a lot of ships, I don't have any rules like if I like Carlando then I don't like any other Carlos and Lando ships. I'm here for the comfort, it doesn't really matter which ship gives it to me. Also, I'm kinda open to polyamory so shipping for me is a bit different than to others. 😃

So yeah, they're cute, I like them.

3. JEV/André/Sam | Jean-Éric Vergne/André Lotterer/Sam Bird

I don't even have a pic of all of them together (and I can only put ten in one post) but I read a story or two with them being in an open or polyamorous relationship and I really liked them. I have a feeling that Jeandré is the ship that is perfectly ideal to transform into a triad because I think they can be mature enough to communicate well and manage the relationship well.

3. Riccussell | Daniel Ricciardo/George Russell [Formula 1]

I love Daniel and I love George, so this ship is perfect for me. ❤ George's support to Daniel last year was everything to me. They're my special little ship. 🥺❤

2. Maximilian/James | Maximilian Günther/James Rossiter [Formula E]

When I joined the FE fandom and Maximilian became my chosen one, I was kind of surprised that there wasn't really any Maximilian ships. And then somehow Maximilian and James became a thing and GUYS the stories on Ao3. The stories. Oh my god. They're AMAZING. Like truly amazing. I don't really like to read long single chapter stories (over 5K is long for me, 15K is my limit, I don't really read longer ones if they're in one piece) but I love reading those Maximilian and James stories because it's amazing how well those authors can capture their personality. Sometimes I'm a bit jealous because I still don't know enough about the FE drivers' personalities to write about them (yes, I'm too lazy to watch the documentaries and things like that). So yeah, shoutout to the Maximilian/James authors on Ao3, you're doing God's work, guys! ❤

2. Charlos | Carlos Sainz Jr/Charles Leclerc [Formula 1]

The heart eyes. The "baby"s. The touches. The jokes. The "violence". They're everything. They've grown on me and I think about them a lot and I don't know what I'll do when they won't be teammates anymore. They're so perfect together. Another emotional hurt/comfort ship. The pain is almost always there, I don't have to introduce Ferrari to you, so yeah, hugs and cuddles and comfort and understanding and everything. And love. ❤

1. Jeandré | Jean-Éric Vergne/André Lotterer

The husbands (my original husbands were Vandevries | Nyck de Vries/Stoffel Vandoorne but I couldn't really fit them here but still wanted to mention them because they're special to me as they were the ones I wrote my first English story about). They're so funny and perfect together, another comfort ship like almost all the others. 😂 I love how close they're to each other. ❤

1. Maxiel | Max Verstappen/Daniel Ricciardo [Formula 1]

Okay, so, Maxiel is my number one, the order of the list can change every hour but Maxiel will always be my number one. They were the ones that make me fall in love with Formula 1. Max's past and his relationship with Daniel is also a really good hurt/comfort material to fanfics and exactly this is what I look for in fanfics in this fandom.

I wanted to be a Maxiel author for so long but for some reason I still only have a zine that is Maxiel, but I have some Maxiel stories planned, I'm just really slow writing them because it's usually easier to write for the prompts I get and sadly I don't really get Maxiel prompts so my Maxiel stories are only in my head for now. :(

But yeah, I have one/two very specific Maxiel ideas and I hope one day I'll be able to write and post them.

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Tagging @charlosgoggles and @wolfsbanesbite, if you haven't done it yet and you want to. 😊❤