#i tried to put everyone close to at least one character they're connected to but obviously i couldn't get everything

[accirax]

Happy 5th Anniversary DRDT!!!!!!! and happy birthday Mai too :D

[rebo-chan]

I've been thinking about KHR's bonds. (When am I not?) And I've thought about the way that Amano likes to write bonds. You'd be pressed in this fandom to find people who don't care about at least one area of it whether that's the Vongola kids, Varia, the Arcobaleno, Kokuyo, etc. After a conversation with my best friend, I realized it's kinda interesting how Amano has somehow successfully created so many realistic bonds for such a diverse cast. Like we see so little of them, but you'd be pressed to convince the KHR fans that the funeral wreaths don't adore Byakuran.

So there's the thing right? Katekyo hitman reborn is the shonen that is 100% about the power of friendship. Like yes other shounens use it and its a meme for a reason, but they also have other stuff going on. Other motivations. Other theming. Meanwhile Tsuna growing up and becoming a better person for his friends /is/ the theme of Reborn. That is the entire motivation for the series. There's no grandiose scheme where Tsuna will save the Mafia world and be the chosen one, though the series tries to put Tsuna in this position to his chagrin.

As evidenced by the scene in Future arc, where Tsuna is unable to light his ring because he is so stressed about sending everyone back to the future and fighting this unknown powerful enemy. And so Reborn walks up and tells him "You're not a hero. Stop trying to be. It's not like you. What were you thinking about when you first lit your flame?" And he responded with "I just..wanted to protect Kyoko." Reborn satisfied with that answer then asks, "And who do you want to protect now?" And Tsuna answers with "Everyone." And then his ring lit up. That's the core to the series!! Right there!! All it ever was 403 chapters worth of these characters just wanting to protect each other.

So, in talking to my best friend, he pointed out that outside of daily life arc, these characters don't really have moments of vulnerability towards each other. Frankly, it seems the cast of KHR is allergic to being vulnerable. There aren't that many scenes of "you guys are important to me. I love you guys." Y'know stuff that tells the audience yeah these guys are close. And when Tsuna TRIES to have these moments, like with Reborn, Reborn pretends like he's asleep and doesn't hear Tsuna say that he's going to save him. Yet somehow, we all understand that these characters love each other so deeply.

And that made me realize it's all in the dialogue and actions, rather than inherent bonding moments. It's Reborn clenching his fist when Tsuna is getting gravely injured by Daemon. It's Yamamoto and Gokudera having a fight about Gokudera not being worthy of being Tsunas right hand man as Gokudera doesn't care for the other members of their family. And Gokudera never addressing this again, there's no verbal indication that Gokudera even heard Yamamotos criticism. Yet later during Merone invasion, Gokudera reaches a hand out to catch Yamamoto when they're getting separated. And later, he protects Ryoheis unconscious body as he is fighting Gamma to the death. It's Byakuran saving the funeral wreaths from their miserable lives and them protecting him even when he begins to strike them down. It's the way Mukuro runs to assist Chrome when she is in danger, or swears up and down that he is not allied with Tsuna but also feeds the Vongola information about Byakuran. It's the way Squalo refuses to cut his hair for his vow to Xanxus, or Mammon's gratitude towards Xanxus's willingness to fight for them. It's Ken ensuring that Chrome is always fed by giving her the snacks and candy they bought. These characters don't need bonding moments, their love for each other shines through their every breath and finger twitch.

And I think that's a fascinating way to write a connection on Amanos behalf. And it was done so well we can't even argue that these characters all love each other.

The way I summarized it is most characters love each other because they spend time together and improve together. KHR characters spend time together and get better together because they love each other

Anyway that's it for this one. Please let me know any dialogue/actions that drive you guys mad about these characters 👀 I know this series is full of them.

[vickyvicarious]

Ooh any thoughts on the pairs chosen and their tasks, for the final hunt?

I actually think I have a half-written post about exactly this lurking in my drafts from last year, though I will warn you that it contains spoilers for the journeys. Let me see if I can find it and finish it/clean it up a smidge... Ah. Yes. Here it is:

So, let's take a look at our travel arrangements. The team almost (but not quite) split up into the exact three options Mina listed for Dracula to follow. The only difference being that instead of "by road" we have "along the river." But still it's pretty close.

Each group has a sort of designated scribe who has historically been one of the main writers of the novel (more a meta necessity this, but given the heroes making such use of records it is still helpful to them if they wish to compile an account afterwards as well) as well as someone who will probably take the lead on vampire hunting, though where they can everyone will surely assist. They also have at least one person per group who can presumably make themselves understood by locals. I also added a 'caretaker' category because they're all running low on steam and it is an important consideration character-wise.

Basically this is just me taking a look at how each team is divvied up and why/what meta we could get out of it.

By Rail: Van Helsing and Mina

Scribe: Mina

Fighter: Van Helsing

Languages: Van Helsing

Caretaker: alternating

The two leaders. The brains if you will. They are heading straight to the castle. Van Helsing wants to kill the vampire women, and if he can get the jump on them/ambush them in their coffins it makes sense for him to do so rather than the younger men, whose strength is better saved for a possible direct confrontation with Dracula. And if anyone dies doing this, Van Helsing basically says better the old man who has already lived a long life. Keeping Mina further away from Dracula for as long as possible makes sense too in order to minimize what influence he can have upon her. Having her along to help find the castle as well will be useful, though it does mean she'll be brought in closer contact with his seat of operations and other vampires. But they've planned not to bring her into the castle itself.

The mode of transport is fitting for both of them. Mina of course IS the train fiend and so it's perfect for her to ride a train there. But Van Helsing too has spent a lot of time riding trains back and forth in the book to acquire information that can save a woman from becoming a vampire. Now his last train journey is in an effort to put that information into practice as he tries to save Mina from becoming a vampire/stop the spread by killing the other vampires. Not to mention of course Mina isn't really well and he is older so letting them take the relatively less taxing forms of transportation (train then carriage) makes sense. They both express concern for one another and work together to make sure the other is doing as well as they can throughout the journey as well.

Mina specifically traveling this way makes for a really cool transition from her utilizing the ultra-modern method to then traveling into the past almost as she echoes Jonathan's journey from the beginning of the book and also becomes more and more connected to vampirism/the vampire ladies (and by extent the ancient opposite of the modern civilization that the train represents). This rush to get there first also could reflect the two of them, but especially Mina, outthinking Dracula as they are ready to ambush him upon arrival.

Finally, Van Helsing was the most concerned over Mina's fate and was the one she put most in charge of deciding when she be killed... but he was meant to ensure Jonathan did the deed. So it makes for a really interesting pairing to put him there to make that final judgement but his own promise inclines him to put off action even if he thinks she's passed the point of no return. That said he still is trying really hard to have faith in her despite his doubts and fears, not just because of the promise.

By Land: Quincey and Jack

Scribe: Jack

Fighter: Quincey

Languages: Jack

Caretaker: none

Quincey volunteers early for this job. And Jack speaks up to join him because they work well together and have done things like this before. This actually makes them the only team to both do that, as Van Helsing argued for where Jonathan and Mina should both go. They are also the only pair who already know one another well pre-vampire hunting together.

While this is perhaps the least likely route to meet vampires (second-likeliest route to encounter Dracula, but the other group will almost certainly meet the vampire ladies) it is probably the most physically taxing. They're riding all day. Jack could theoretically be the caretaker here, as he is the doctor, but in reality they both are pressing on really hard and neither one is shown to be making sure the other gets enough rest or whatever. It kind of seems like they're setting a pace where they're both tired enough to just drop off when they get a chance.

Quincey is the leader among the two of them. He's the first to volunteer, and he seems very comfortable with horses and leading a hunt. However, in the larger context of his role in the group as a whole, he is very much the support, and while Jack has had a much larger role, when in the group he's generally support as well (though his trust with Van Helsing means he is usually more involved in discussions than Quincey). So it is fitting that these two are taking the "just in case" route - especially Quincey, who often does this sort of filling in where needed. Also fitting that they are bringing along horses for the others should they be needed. They're being the support team.

One more kind of interesting detail... this is the only group to actually travel with other people for a while, but also the group who talks to locals least. No meta point to this, just noticed it.

By Water: Arthur and Jonathan

Scribe: Jonathan

Fighter: Jonathan

Languages: Jonathan

Caretaker: Arthur

This list of roles makes it sound like Arthur isn't doing much. But that's far from true. It's quite possible he can communicate with locals as well (I just put Jonathan down as we know for a fact he can, though stiltedly) and he's proven himself in defeating a vampire in the past. Jonathan however is the main fighter, shown multiple times not to hesitate to attack Dracula. In fact though, Arthur's most important role here is as the caretaker and transport. He ensures that Jonathan gets the rest he needs, and he's the one not only to acquire the boat but the one who knows how to operate it. Not flawlessly, as we are told when there's a crash, but he's still essential in getting them up the river.

These two men following what seems to be the specific route Dracula took makes for some really interesting continuation of Jonathan's book-long acquisition/mimicry of Dracula's traits. The boat in the first place and then their impersonation of Romanian officials also is another instance of the repeated contrast of Arthur as the good (vis)count using his money and status to help, as opposed to Count Dracula or his alias De Ville using his status and money for evil.

It also is really fitting to pair Jonathan and Arthur together as the two husbands of the women Dracula has attacked. Arthur's reality could become Jonathan's future if they don't succeed here. There's some psychopomp imagery that got talked about a few years ago which can add another fun layer. The linked post there is focused mostly on Greek mythology, and talks more about this, but these two being the ones to travel up a river into a symbolic land of the dead (Dracula's land) is fitting in a couple ways too.

When convincing him to go with Arthur, Van Helsing invokes Jonathan's right to revenge as well. Mina aside, both of these two are the ones who have the most 'right' in that sense, as they've been most personally harmed by the Count. Arthur has gotten some measure of closure when staking Lucy at least, but Jonathan hasn't had anything of the sort. They're both "young and strong" and highly motivated.

.

Not to be reductive, but there's kind of a fun thing going on with head/hand/heart here if you want. Mina and Van Helsing are the new/old brains and each leaders in their own right. Quincey and Jack are both more supportive characters at least by this point in the book and one is shown to be a protector physically while the other is literally a doctor. Jonathan and Arthur are the lovers of the women attacked by Dracula, and also represent two different approaches to the idea of said love becoming a vampire (though again it's never fully realized in Jonathan's case, so presumably he could have gone either way should he be forced to actually make the choice).

Another fun detail when comparing all three... In each case, one person or another takes the lead at least some of the time. Mina and Van Helsing are the ones who alternate that role most. They both take turns looking after one another, driving the horses, and we even get written accounts from both of them. Jonathan and Arthur both take turns on watch but Arthur is the one who knows what he's doing on the ship and looking after Jonathan who is totally focused on leading the hunt. We don't hear much from the other two on their journey, but presumably Quincey is mostly in the lead - I say this because he historically has been in such circumstances (which Jack specifically mentioned when agreeing to go with him).

[angelmachines]

teru & socialization

i've posted about this before but something ive been thinking about a LOT is mp100's themes of loneliness (and eventual connections). i think this is an aspect of teru's character (in particular) that gets left out because it's not as explicit but i've been wanting to do a deep dive on it for a while and i finally sat down to do it. just a warning, this post is gonna be LONG.

these two panels are from chapter 16 of the manga (which i'm using for my evidence because i. dont want to scrub through the anime LOL). initial sentiment: teru uses his powers to cheat having friends/a good social life and wouldn't have that if he tried earnestly. this is a fair interpretation of the scene. with what we know, at this point of time (as in within the teru-mob fight) teru would not be able to connect with other people earnestly, due to his mindset. which i think is a fair interpretation, HOWEVER:

(from chapter 17 ^^) the first panel shows teru's expression to be strained and the second is visibly unhappy. this puts the first set of panels into a different context, that maybe underneath all of this, teru doesn't WANT any of this life that he's built. keep in mind that i'm analyzing this with teru's possible autistic tendencies in mind & you dont have to believe he's autistic, im not your dad, but i do find this a pretty meaningful indication of masking if he were

(note: yes, the strain can definitely be read as comp-het, and i would agree but that's not relevant so go read this post on that instead)

even if the rest of these panels show teru content with his life, i think these expressions are pretty vital to how we read his life especially because we know so little of it. think about it, if you were a kid desperate for affection because you couldn't get it anywhere else, especially not in a way that would come off as "mature" or "unaffected", wouldn't you also look for validation in your popularity? even if it aligned you with people who you consider fundamentally different to you? my point here is that teru can't not stand out-- it's in his nature-- and we are shown how he tries to blend in & receive attention in the only way possible to him; which is to say that he molds himself into something that is palatable, likeable, and superior to other people. if he's nothing, like mob, he has spent his entire life covering up for it. if he fails socially, like mob, he has to be good at everything (even if he cheats to do so) so that everyone else can look past it.

(side note for my teru angst enjoyers: this is a panel of his mom. the mom who he hasn't seen in years. doesn't it make sense that, if he hasn't heard his mom say he's proud of him for literal years, that he would overachieve in response? not related to the autism thing i just have the teru bug. also don't be misogynistic in my notes both his parents suck we just get a singular mention of his mom)

so if teru couldn't meaningfully have friends before mob, that could very easily be because of his past mindset, right?

...except, we don't.. really... see him make other friends afterwards.

but, the awakening lab, right?

(ok i lied to you sorry there is one anime screenshot and thats because it stood out to me while i rewatched it earlier this month. sorry.) id like to bring attention to this screenshot during the cultural festival because the awakening lab can definitely be seen as a direct contradiction of this and i'd like to point out a couple things:

1) in this scene the shiratori brothers are in another room 2) them and the other three are friends with ritsu (or at least close enough acquaintances to want to see him).

considering this is one of the only times they appear together for Fun i am more inclined to believe this is an encounter where they went together because they all would've gone separately anyway. this isn't to discount the possible bond that these characters might have, but thats the thing. we... aren't really shown that they're friends and enjoy spending time together outside of this screenshot, where two out of six of the members are not even present. not to mention that teru is still placing himself in a role separate from his peers. despite stripping the superiority away, teru is still the awakening lab's mentor, not friend. teru still views himself as fundamentally different in a context where his psychic powers don't make him that way.

...except with mob. i bring this placement of power up because where he is the awakening lab's mentor, teru declares mob to be his rival, or, in other words, teru is just like him. he is accepting that mob and him are the same. (and if we view mob from an autistic lens... so on and so forth)

as if to hammer in that point even further-- in the summer vacation omake, teru explicitly states that "summer break is just a super long, super boring stretch of alone time." i'm not sure of the timeline here, but guessing from the hair, we're at least post season 1. which gives us explicit confirmation here that teru is spending the break alone despite his relationship to the awakening lab. his connection to mob is a lifeline here because mob is one of the only people who can intuitively understand teru's isolation without judgment

(also, on that point of teru's autistic tendencies: teru does and says a LOT of things that would raise other peoples eyebrows and doesn't seem to notice.

here we get teru actively admitting to his home life, right in front of reigen, WHO COULD CALL CHILD SERVICES ON HIM? this genuinely made me rethink this character entirely. teru's filter is... minimal. he isn't constantly volunteering information and generally minds his own business, but if you ask? Well.

teru is a social person, but to say he is proficient in understanding social situations seems... wrong. teru views his loneliness as boring because, despite being fairly open, does not actually allow himself to think about his own feelings and how they affect him. this loneliness is boring because he doesn't have enough of a reference to realize its not

if we are taking pre-mob teru to be a version of himself who is masking, or at the very least someone who is faking a lot of stuff in a less autistic sense, the fight with mob changes teru to the point where he no longer hides himself. in the same way that mob was able to shake teru's fragile superiority complex i think the change in appearance marks the end of the self teru had built up. from this point on we see him become a lot more... Him. his appearance and his fashion choices are, presumably, completely normal to him and we get no indication that he believes otherwise despite the reactions it gets-- which is... well, i wouldn't be writing this post if i thought it was one of his most neurotypical traits.

in fact, he seems... pretty oblivious to what other people think of him. which is an interesting distinction to make considering the intelligence we Know he possesses (which is not to say that you are unintelligent if you don't pick up on social cues, just that its common for media to depict it that way.) these traits are made pointedly, even if unintentionally, separate, ESPECIALLY when you note the amount of characters who Do ruminate on or stare at teru's appearance.

some examples. i don't even think this is all of it-- case in point.)

[fandom-rants-here]

I'm kind of stupid and slow on things and have only in the past few months started getting into D&D, so bare with me on this. Also, correct me if I fuck anything up.

I'm starting with Mike because I'm looking into paladins right now and recently saw a post that the paladin description reminded me of.

In the post, op talked about how, to Mike, promises were a really big thing. Something people don't break. Ever.

He, as far as I remember and based off of the only two moments mentioned in the post, only makes two promises. Both to El and both of which he is visibly hesitant about making. He knows what promises mean to himself and how he explain them to Eleven. No matter how his feelings change, he does not break his promises.

Now, this ties into his character as a paladin as they are described like this, "Paladins are united by their oaths to stand against the forces of annihilation and corruption. Whether sworn before a god’s altar, in a sacred glade before nature spirits, or in a moment of desperation and grief with the dead as the only witnesses, a Paladin’s oath is a powerful bond. It is a source of power that turns a devout warrior into a blessed champion." (D&D and Beyond)

An oath and a promise are practically the same thing, especially given the context. I think that this is another reason Mike's character was chosen to be a paladin. Yes, he's a leader and yes, he defends people, but there also the oath aspect of his character. These three things delve into so much of Mike's actions throughout the show.

Will calling Mike "The Heart" isn't just because he's super fucking gay for him, but Mike is one of the main connectors and leaders of The Party. Lucas and Will met because Mike befriended them both. El met The Party because Mike hid her in the basement. Jonathan and Nancy got close because their brothers were close. Mike is the first of the main Party to have any connection with Steve (even if it isn't the strongest literally ever). He, especially in seasons 1 and 2 (before he has a major fucking identity crisis and all that good shit) is a major leader and strategist.

He physically defends the people around him at his own expense all the fucking time. Season 1 when he jumps off the cliff (that needs to be brought up omg). Season 2 when Dart dares to even look in Will's direction and Mike tries to kill the fucker immediately. Season 3 when he tries to fight Billy multiple times in hand to hand combat. Season 4 where he activley puts himself between Will and the bullets as much as he can. He fucking defends the people around him. (There's more, but I'm clearly not good at being brief.)

And the whole thing with one fucking promise when he was like 13 dictating his whole damn life for well over a year. He promised El to take her to the Snowball. A simple promise that he thought would help her, and it did. But then that led to them dating. And it was fine because they'd kiss and hang out at Hopper's cabin but at least he can hang out with everyone else outside of that. And then Hopper makes him lie to El, which leads to the break up. Sure, Mike's a bit bummed and a hell of a lot confused, but he's ranting to his friends and it's fine.

And amidst his whole "They're conspiring" bullshit, he says he loves El. Looking at his and everyone else's face, ain't nobody expect that, especially not Mike himself. But El hears say that, and she says she loves him too before kissing him goodbye. Most people would be fucking thrilled. Not Mike though. He looks confused and sad. but El is in Cali so he's fucking fine.

But it just got worse and now he won't let himself back out. Now he has to be her boyfriend, now he has to keep her happy, now he has to do all these things even though he doesn't anymore. By the end of season 4, El doesn't need him anymore. But he doesn't kmow that, so he lies to her (something he really does not like doing). And, again, he can't get out.

Mike dictates his whole damn life around promises. Paladin fucking behavior.

[meowierz]

swap au idea

ethgoesboom and the sun and moon show have a lot of things in common. i would like to point to sun and golden freddy specifically. they both accidentally killed at least one child and blame themselves for it ever since. though, how they both deal with the trauma is very different. not only that but they've also been beefing with a villain for years and they haven't reached a breaking point. of course, until the fazbear massacre and the sun snaps arc.

basically, we swap the characters and put them in the other's arcs. including their friends, enemies, etc. now, they still have the same past with eachother. it's just that everything up to the event I mentioned.

golden freddy snaps and kills plushtrap after all the taunting he has done. im replacing bloodmoon with plushtrap because they act similar and just like sun, golden MIGHT have some trauma with him. golden duo or just c.c being golden freddy may be the case here, meaning that plushtrap would've been haunting him. even if it's none of that, he still feels a close connection with the crying child and doesn't like any of the nightmares. anyways, that results in the puppet doing all the things moon did (locking sun in a cage, scolding him, etc). lunar will get replaced by bb since, at the time, the both acted similar. plus, springtrap will be replacing eclipse for obvious reasons and we all know how much he likes killing kids. wait, what about the moon arc? him going into his mind! I got you. in ethgoesboom, the puppet is similar the jigsaw aka ruin when he first arrived. well, instead it brings things to live instead of bringing them to death. but it's been getting too silly so it tries going into it's mind to see what the problem is.

during christmas, eclipse will want to visit earth since springtrap wanted to be let out to see his daughter. he was doing good and earth wanted him out full time. if you don't know, springtrap was locked in a backroom so the same will happen to eclipse. anyways, eclipse is let out and he starts acting like ver 4 eclipse. but, then eclipse gets reminded of why he was in there in the first place. with springtrap, it was a penguin game. with eclipse, probably a game about revenge or getting betrayed. maybe little nightmares 2? anyways, he ends up stealing the star and transforming the following characters into phantoms so he can control them. moon, lunar, roxy to mainly piss off sun and probably some of the other glamrocks. what's left is monty, the tsams golden freddy, and solar (kinda ish?). then the basic fnaf 3 sequence happens and they play the mini games that are linked to the characters to help turn them back but on night 5 they're locked out by bloodmoon. since bloodmoon has beef with eclipse, just like springtrap and plushtrap, it just makes sense. night 6 roles around and they don't know what to do because its not working. so, sun goes out to figure out its only because he hasn't done night 6. ofc, the place burns down. but, moon and other smart characters are back to normal so they use the remains of the star to turn back time just like in ethgoesboom.

bonus headcanons because im bored:

teaps puppet would be friends with egb puppet. no evidence for that one chief. you just gonna trust me.

kidscove MIGHT work here because egb foxy and teaps foxy got similar personalities except for egb actually has anger issues LIKE SUN. start the fanart back up guys /j

eclipse would hate literally everyone but the egb foxy, golden freddy, and the balloon kids (balloon world wink wink). he would have personal beef with bonnie because he has a problem with fowa.

[icanttypo]

Yknow, at first, when I saw the latest episode, I had been a bit disappointed with the route that they took Simon and Betty's romance; but after thinking it over quite a bit, I think I appreciate the route they took, despite how differently it makes me see the characters. Sometimes, the right thing for a story isn't always the best thing, just like how in life, not everyone makes the right choices all the time. Emotions make life beautiful, but they also muddle things up.

I've never been one for a teacher x student type romance. That whole power imbalance always leaves a sour taste in my mouth. Since Simon was just a guest speaker, it wasn't quite the same, but I think a lot of people, including myself, saw those parallels. But, I think the whole idea of unhealthy/obsessive/codependent love has always been centeral to their relationship.

Unlike some may assume, the unhealthiness doesn't stem from that part, though. Yes, there's a small age gap. Yes, Simon made a ton of mistakes. But with further analysis, nothing about it is painted as your stereotypical incredibly unhealthy teacher/student ship. Instead, it's their issues and strengths that create chaos.

There's nothing about their relationship that can be considered grooming, and I say this as someone who's personally been groomed. They didn't get into a relationship until after Betty tried to leave the second time, and there's absolutely nothing about Simon that screams "predator." You know how he is with Marcy and Finn, and pretty much every child he comes in contact with (when he isn't throwing away their favorite books). Hell, even Ice King had standards and lines he wouldn't cross. Their issues stem from their insecurities as professional nerds, and as two broken, lonely, people.

When you're a student, especially one who's passionate about the subject matter you're learning about, you can't help but put your teachers (the good ones, I mean), on a pedestal. They're these untouchable gods who have somehow cracked the answers to questions you haven't even asked yet and who are there to guide you. And as a teacher, you want nothing more than to see a student thrive, be happy, and enjoy your lessons. There's nothing more satisfying than seeing your student take your lesson, and run with it, and go farther than you ever could. From the start, these two towed the lines of codependency.

Simon was laughed at by his fellow professors and other archeologists for believing that the Enchiridion existed; which couldn't have been a good feeling as a professional. Sure, after the expedition with Betty, he was rewarded with all the glory one could wish for; but that isolation must've been horrible. He must've been seen along the same veins as the "Ancient Aliens" guys, as a crackpot conspiracy theorist, barely deserving of his PHD. I can imagine just how much of a relief it'd be to have someone so brilliant as Betty agree with your findings, and be willing to help you prove once and for all, that you aren't crazy.

Betty seemed to struggle with connecting with her peers. I'm mostly gathering this from how willing she was to sacrifice everything for Simon, I'd bet he was the only genuine close relationship, romantic or otherwise, that she had. We (or at least I) don't know much about Betty's backstory, but I think at least that much can be surmised. In Ep 8 FC, she mentions her mother, and in season 9 or 10, we see her calling someone before she met Simon... But, that's about all we have for close relationships. How many people would you jump through a portal for? Become god for? Sacrifice your sanity for? To have someone you admire, think that you're basically the strongest, bravest person they ever met in the world and to actually be needed by them... From what we know about Betty, she definitely had a savior complex of some sorts. Happens to the best of us, but still. She got so used to sacrificing things for Simon that she never thought about going back to Australia with him to continue her study, or both studying different things together, just helping him.

They both gave each other what the world deprived them of: validation, love, and respect. But because neither of them had anyone else to rely upon, to provide them with those bare necessities, they became unhealthy for one another. Neither of them has truly lived without the other because they were eachothers home. Their food, water, and shelter.

So, in a lot of ways, I think it was for the best they added this extra layer. It helps you truly understand the imperfections of their relationship, just how desperate both of them were as two nerdy little archeologists, to find and keep the love they had alive.

[bearimba]

Thank you so much @invisiblemelonmoose!!! Hope you don't mind me answering your comment with a post, it's just a lot easier to format this way since I have quite a bit to say on the subject >:)c

So right off the bat, none of the kids have an actual connection to the legendaries---no special ✨chosen ones✨ or anything like that. It's more of a thematic thing for characterization purposes. To put it simply, each legendary has a specific word/trait I've associated with it for one reason or another, and so each character exhibits their respective trait in a way that they're supposed to grapple with throughout their game's storyline. Aka, an easy recipe for character growth!

Red -> Moltres (passion) Leaf -> Articuno (composure) Blue -> Zapdos (wit)

Since there's not really much lore for the Legendary Birds (at least not that I can find---there's a bit from the movies but I don't typically work with the animated stuff as source material), I had a very vague starting point, so I decided to go off their elements when selecting traits. Fire is often associated with burning, consuming passion---but Red isn't exactly the most animated guy in canon. Instead of being outwardly enthused, he has a much more mellow but no less intense love for pokemon. Big or small, tough or weak, he has a soft spot for them all. However, he also happens to have a talent for battling that Oak picks up on, for which he encouraged him (to a maddening degree) to pick up battling and eventually the Indigo League. Yet all the nagging and expectations---from nearly everyone around him, not just Oak---wears down on him, and it takes a forfeited match and an extended trip to the coldest, most isolated place in the region to recall that old flame... Blue takes after his grandfather in that he has a lightning-quick intelligence---not that Oak ever seems to be particularly impressed. In a family full of extraordinary people, Blue only ever seems to be extra ordinary. As a result, he goes out of his way to appear confident and cocky, though it's less about having an inferiority complex and more so just wanting to be noticed. He's even compared to Red constantly, who is objectively the better battler and who is the main reason Blue takes on the gym challenge himself. But on his journey, his self-assurance actually causes him to make dumb mistake after dumb mistake that culminates in the loss at the Indigo League. Then Red goes missing all of a sudden, and Blue's left to pick up the pieces of his ego while he and Leaf travel through the Sevii Islands. Out of the trio, Leaf is most definitely the most unfazed. It's not that she's particularly peaceful---watching one of Blue's and hers many arguments will instantly prove otherwise---but overall she's not nearly as passionate as Red or as outspoken as Blue. In fact, she can show an almost icy apathy at times. When Blue returns to Pallet Town without Red and without a Champion title, she's the one to suggest they head out to the Sevii Islands and take a break. But as the situation on the archipelago worsens, Blue digs them into deeper trouble with the remnants of Team Rocket, and they continue to hear nothing but radio silence from Red, Leaf's first instinct is to shove it all down like none of it particularly matters.

Lyra -> Lugia (empathy) Silver -> Ho-Oh (justice)

Ok, this one might need a little explaining since I kind of had to extrapolate here (Lugia's ocean/storm thing is way too close to Kyogre to just go with something water-related, and Ho-Oh is kinda just Moltres But Cooler in a way). In the Tower Duo's legend, the Brass Tower burned down in a rainstorm, during which Lugia tried to quell the fires with the wind. However, that put the rest of Ecruteak in danger, so Lugia had to stand aside and let it burn---its empathy led to its own downfall, so to say. Then Ho-Oh came along and revived the pokemon that had died in the tower (the Legendary Beasts), but fixing the injustice that happened to the Beasts caused the townsfolk to drive them away. Also, we're ignoring the whole blurb about trainers who can "touch the souls of pokemon" or have a "pure heart" bringing the Tower Duo back---I'm regarding that as a legend that's more so about people and pokemon as collectives regaining trust in one another (remember, trying to avoid chosen ones here). Anywaysss, moving on to Lyra and Silver! Lyra is a very empathic person, but she relates to pokemon far more than she does people. She's used to going along with anything and watching the world move on around her, so when she's faced with actual conflict, she struggles to go out of her way to help. Meanwhile, Silver has no problem calling out such infractions when he sees them, but he often fails to consider the fallout when trying to confront it---especially how it'll affect his own pokemon. Their arcs throughout HGSS involve learning from each other (as in their arcs are so intwined it's extremely difficult to discuss them separately) until by the end, Lyra becomes Champion and gains the power and motivation to help everyone, while Silver is... well, he's stuck reevaluating his entire worldview and goes through a teeny tiny itty bitty little existential crisis, but that's a story for another day (aka spoilers that I would like to cover in its own post). Originally, the plan was to pair the johtags to each Legendary Beast with Kris, Ethan, and Lyra relating to Raikou, Entei, and Suicune respectively. However, the fire/water/electric combo felt way too similar to the kantrio kids, and I couldn't really come up with anything original that felt like it would fit. I feel like I can justify it though considering both Kris's and Ethan's journeys have nothing to do with the plot of HGSS (Kris's takes place a few years before during GSC and Ethan's doing his own thing with Eusine during HGSS) sooo......

Brendan -> Groudon (structure?) May -> Kyogre (entropy?) Wally -> Rayquaza (ambition?)

I'll be completely honest here, I've barely fleshed out the Hoenn trio. like. at all. so I won't say much here for fear of writing something that I don't agree with later. But! I can say that while the kanjoh kids all start off with their defining traits, I want Brendan, May, and Wally to work up to theirs. Other than that, I'd have to do way more research into the characters and plotline to come up with a decent semi-faithful interpretation, so this is my formal apology to all the Hoenn fans reading this :( I'll get to it someday I promise!!!!

Dawn -> Mespirit (emotion) Lucas -> Azelf (willpower) Barry -> Uxie (knowledge)

Since I've saved the Creation Trio for PLA, the Sinnoh kids get the Lake Guardians! It's easy pickings, too, since they've already got characteristics practically built into them. I know the matchup here mighttt look off considering the character's in-game personalities, but hear me out on this: Dawn starts out on her pokemon journey purely to spite her mother and becomes Champion mostly because she can. If that's not emotional-led thinking, I don't know what is. She certainly doesn't act emotional half the time---she's level-headed, and clever enough to get herself out of all the trouble she causes---but there is very much a reason why she and Barry get along so well. In addition to that, she does hold a very firm belief that certain things should go certain ways and she will do just about everything to ensure they do. In that respect, she can come across as quite entitled, but it isn't inherently in a mean-spirited fashion. She just needs to figure out what's worth fighting for and what isn't. Lucas is much more stubborn than he typically lets on. He does come off as a little awkward and even bumbling at times, but he's also a trainer on par with Dawn and Barry. Considering he's a dedicated research assistant underneath Rowan and Dawn/Barry are full-time trainers, it'd take quite a bit of commitment to train his team enough to keep up. It takes quite a bit of convincing to get him to back down from something once he's set on it. If something's false, he has to correct it (it's not about him being right, it's about getting the facts straight), and if he doesn't agree with a rule, he'll simply ignore it (why should a rule exist if it's stupid anyways?) Though it can be inconvenient at times, it's exactly this attitude that allows him to survive getting blasted back to ancient Hisui. Also a fun fact: Lucas is the only protag to officially have two legendary associations, as his character correlates to Azelf and Dialga in DPPt and PLA respectively (Akari gets Palkia, and you'll never guess who Giratina is left to... >_> ). Barry loves to learn, he just can't focus for the life of him. He's constantly the first to know and the first on the scene, he always uses his losses as a chance to reflect and improve his team, and he even goes out of his way to memorize all he can at the Trainers' School in Jubilife. That's not to say he especially cares about learning subjects outside of his interests, but he absolutely does get sucked deep into whatever catches his eye. Especially after Lucas's disappearance, he devotes all his free time to research just so he can figure out what happened to his friend---and just possibly, with some help, he manages to catch a lead...

[farfromstrange]

Chaos Theory | Michael Kinsella x Reader

Chapter 3: I'll Show You Every Version Of Myself Tonight

Masterlist ° Chapter List

Pairing: Michael Kinsella x Reader

Summary: Michael recalls what happened during the day, and he tells you the truth (kind of).

Warnings: Angst, mention of death, non-sexual intimacy, Michael just hates himself, description of a seizure, slight hint at a panic attack (?), Everyone telling Mikey what to do (and they're being assholes about it)

Word Count: 7.7k

A/n: As promised, this is the day from Michael's POV, and explaining why he was so desperate that night (and wanted to get away for a few days). I struggled a lot with so many characters and writing their accents, so I apologize for any mistakes! Also, we have some plot in here and some of the other Kinsella family members, but nothing too major. Also, I do not accept any Birdy slander!

His hand strokes leisurely over your bare thigh. You’re lying with your head toward the headboard while he’s lying the other way around; He’s propped himself up on a pillow at your feet and draws absentminded shapes on your skin. 

Silence has settled over you. Your eyes are closed, your breathing steady, but you’re not asleep. He can tell by how you react to his touch. 

Your skin feels like silk under his fingers. You offer a little bit of calm, the end he had been begging for after this awful day, and being with you now, still close but not holding each other, he revels in the intimacy of it all. You share time without talking, and maybe that’s a bad idea with how many secrets are between you, but that is not what bothers him. 

“What are you thinking about?” your gentle whisper breaks through the silence, but it doesn’t burst the bubble you have formed around yourselves. 

Michael sits up, He’s wearing boxers and nothing else, and the closer he gets, the more the temptation rises to run your hand through his hair – all of his hair. You reach out to touch his torso. His chest hair feels soft under your fingers. 

He sighs wearily. One of his arms hooks around your bent knee and he places his head upon it. You look at him from your comfortable place on the pillows. There is something about your eyes that puts him into a state of awe. Your hand is still stroking his chest, but it’s not sexual, it’s caring, it’s a silent testament. 

“Today was…” he’s not sure how to describe it. Every single one of his days feels weird somehow. 

You pulled him somewhat back into the present, but deep inside, he still lives in the past. In his mind, he finds himself back in prison sometimes, and that’s terrifying. He has adapted behaviorisms that he would have never thought possible like keeping the untouched food out instead of throwing it away, not shaving, only showering at certain times and most of all, he still struggles to sleep in a bed. He tried. After meeting you, it became easier, but he feels himself slipping back into the same patterns from before. 

“What?” you ask. 

He shrugs. 

“Talk to me, please.”

With you, nothing can hurt him, he thinks. 

“I went to see Anna this mornin’,” Michael says, and if you hadn’t focused on him, you wouldn’t have been able to hear his voice. That’s how quietly he admits it to you. 

You frown. He can tell the thoughts are connecting in your mind. 

You know a little about family law in the UK, but you have never thought about what it would look like in Ireland. 

You know from experience that if you’re single, unemployed, fresh out of university, and merely twenty-one years old, a court probably won’t grant you custody of a one-year-old. Even if you’re related. Even if you tell the court that the biological parents – or one of them, at least, even though ignoring abuse can also be counted as such – are abusive and controlling toward their other children. Without proof, they won’t believe you, and if they don’t believe you, you won’t get custody. 

And if you were in prison for eight years after being convicted for the wrongful death of your own wife… well, chances are that getting custody or even visitation rights as the biological parent is going to be a hard task unless the child isn’t safe where it is now – but Anna is safe, from what you heard from Michael. And the court isn’t sure if he bettered himself enough to be a father to her. After all, he connects to very serious trauma that a child her age shouldn’t even have to carry, and even though the courts are sometimes unjust when it comes to custody battles, they are very vigilant in this case.

You get it, but you also see a side of Michael the authorities don’t seem to get. He’s a good man. He deserves the chance to at least reconnect with his little girl after being deprived of her for so long. 

You know how much it hurts not being close to someone you love, although in your case, it was your own choice to leave. Still, the pain is grand and anyone who has to carry it might tend to make stupid decisions along the way. Like seeing the very same daughter he is not supposed to even be near. 

“Are you allowed to?” you ask because maybe he is and you read it all wrong. 

But then he shakes his head and he says, “No.” 

“Michael!” 

“I’m sorry, I just can’t– I needed t’see her. I didn’t talk ta her, I just sat there t’see if she’s okay. I had ta–“ he breaks off. “I do it to convince myself she’s real and that‘m not dreamin’. I just want her back. Is that so wrong?”

“It’s not wrong, but you could risk everything just by watching her from a distance. If someone finds out–“

Your eyes soften amid the initial frustration when he moves his head to press his forehead against your knee. You can no longer see his eyes, but the tears pearling off of your skin tell you he’s crying. 

You touch his head. “Michael, darling,” you say, “please, talk to me so I can understand.”

He sniffles. Slowly, he lifts his head and crawls over to you. He reminds you of a cat like this. His head finds support on your chest as he curls into a ball, and you wrap your arms around him. 

“It’s okay…” You run your hand through his hair. “I’ve got you.”

It surprises him how comfortable he is in being vulnerable around you. You unveiled his guarded heart and started slowly breaking down his defenses. He let you in enough for you to see parts of him he had long kept hidden, and you are on your best way to pull it all out of him. 

He shudders under your gentle touch. You are so soft. Not just your skin; your touch and your soul are soft. You cradle him like he is everything to you, but he can’t believe that he would be or should be everything to you. He’s not deserving. He tried today but failed again. 

The foundation that kept his face stern before and added a supposed strength to his demeanor burns under your touch, and soon he is standing in the ashes of pretense and he feels it all.

He denied himself to feel the pain all day and now you’re here and you are so fucking soft– He starts sobbing into your chest, allowing him to fall further and further and further without a ground to land on. But there you are, catching him as often, and you don’t let go until you’re sure he’s safe. 

Your arms have become his forever sanctuary. Feeling comfortable with you has been a hard task from the start and he still struggles, but he can’t help but let himself go in your embrace. You know exactly what he needs. You know who he is and you still stick around, and you know what he needs. It’s not just sex, it’s comfort, something he tried to hide by taking you against the wall, and it was good and he needed it, but he needs this so much more.

And he realizes that he needs to talk to you, too. He can’t just rely on you to touch and comfort him, something he has been lacking for eight years and perhaps even sometime before that while he was burning his life to the ground with a bad decision after bad decision and lost what was dear to him – he has to talk to you to earn that comfort because if he doesn’t, it feels like he’s using you and he once again starts hating all aspects of himself with a passion unmatched. 

You’re doing this because you feel like you have to, he figures; because he’s broken and he looks like it most of the time, and you like to fix when something is broken to earn yourself a little love back, but you deserve more than you think you do and he doesn’t want you to please him just for the sake of pleasing him. He wants you to feel comfortable around him, too, and he wants to give back what you are giving him, and not just through countless orgasms. You’re worth more than that. 

He contemplates, then makes a decision that is hard to swallow, but you deserve it. And so he tells you exactly what happened.

— Earlier that day —

Hearing the lack of trust in your voice when he admitted that he didn’t want to go home moved something in him. Of course, you’ve only just started to get to know each other, but there was something else in your voice that made his heart sink. 

Darkness attracts light. The sun gives way to the moon at night, but the sun always finds a way to shine the brightest. Too much darkness can kill the light, and without light, darkness would take over and then there would be no happiness. 

You’re kind, you put love into every little thing you do and you care about people. That’s the kind of person that people who are much darker than you feel like they can use, and knowing you, you probably let them. But even you reach your limits. 

He could see in your eyes though that you meant it when you said you would help him get a proper job and fight for Anna, and considering you barely know him, that’s a big display of trust – you trust in his ability to be better, at least, and that is something he holds very dear to his damaged heart. 

It’s been a while since someone was so endlessly willing to forgive him and to actually put in the effort to try and be with him; he knows how exhausting it can be, that sometimes being with him can become draining, and that it runs the people around him dry. At least it used to be this way. He hurt you, but you seem to have faith in him. You believe in him, you don’t think he will run you dry and you’re not exhausted. You may be a little weary, but he would never blame you for that. Even more now, Michael wants to stay true to his promise. 

He feels alive with you. Safe. Loved. Cared for. And whenever he is close to you, he feels the desperate need to protect you, not just from him and this stupid life he has been born into but from any other possibility of harm that might come your way. He wants to make sure you’re okay, and that you have someone you can rely on, too. But there is something you’re hiding, he could tell. He’s not an idiot, he can tell when someone isn’t being entirely open with him, it comes with the Kinsella name; he has to know people, be able to read them, and judge quickly but with precision. 

He tried not to let the nagging feeling of you hiding something more serious from him get to him because it is your life and he still feels like he needs to prove himself to you more than anything, though the inkling he has won’t leave him. 

The way you froze when he finished the sentence for you, “We haven’t reached tha’ level of trust yet?” This small moment of hesitation told him that there must be more to it. But he can’t think about that, not now. 

Anna is wearing her usual school uniform as she strolls past the restaurant with two of her friends. He suspects they are her friends because she’s laughing. A sad smile finds its way to his lips. She looks happy. 

He remembers the day she was born. Every parent is somewhat afraid to screw up, especially with their first child. Some are more nervous, others less. Michael was the kind of first-time Dad that found himself thinking too much about what could happen. He was scared of not being enough, of subjecting his daughter to the dangers of his family, and he questioned if he even had what it takes to be a good father. He read books, asked Jimmy and Amanda, and he annoyed Birdy almost every day until the day Anna was born. 

He remembers repeating one sentence in his head, “I can’t do this.” 

But then he heard her first cry, and it took him only a second to realize that he was a Dad now. He remembers the moment he first saw her face, and he forgot everything around him. 

The most pivotal moment was though when he got to hold her in his arms for the first time, so small and fragile, she fit snugly into the crook of his arm. Was he afraid of breaking her? Yes. More than anything. But all she had to do was open her eyes and look at him, and his previous fear of ‘I can’t do this’ evaporated. Left behind was only endless love and a sense of needing to protect the new life in his arms. He swore he would do anything to assure she would have a good life, no matter what. 

And then, almost as if the first-time-parent jitters were an omen, he failed. He failed to be a husband and a father. Jimmy has always managed to coordinate his children, his wife, and the Kinsella life just perfectly, and Michael believed he could do it just like him, just like his brother – but he failed. He always wanted to be just like his brother. 

At first, things went great and he gave everything he had to give, but then real life settled in, and he fucked up all the good things in his life. He fucked up his marriage and he fucked up as the Dad he promised his daughter he would be. In the end, he lost both of them. He lost Allison permanently because he was too caught up with himself and his family, and he lost his daughter, too, because he just wouldn’t listen to his gut, and his fuck-ups turned into a complex construction of dominos that were set out to tear his life and his soul lower than the ground. 

If he could turn back time, he would. But he can’t. He can only try to turn what little of the steering wheel he has left around to get back what he has left of what he lost, and that is Anna. His love for her has not changed since the first day he held her in his arms, only his attitude toward himself and his life changed, and he feels even more miserable now than he ever did before. 

Before he can register it, Anna has disappeared behind the trees. Once again, she didn’t see him. Part of him hopes that one day, if he keeps this going, she will catch sight of him and that maybe she will be happy to see him – does she even know what he looks like? Does she remember? Does she remember the times he told her he loved her? 

He’s not sure how a child’s brain works, or what the trauma did to her, but he would like to know. He would love to understand what makes his little girl tick, even though she is less of a little girl now and starting to grow into a young woman. He missed so much, and that makes him so fucking angry. 

He missed her, but he’s not sure if she missed him. Allison’s mother has never been a fan of him, but after she found out he was responsible for her daughter’s death, her dislike turned into pure hatred. She would have killed him if she had gotten the chance, he’s sure, and she would if she ever saw him again, he is even more sure of that. But he wouldn’t blame her; he deserves it. 

All of this pain, he deserves it. He convinced himself a long time ago that he is suffering for a reason, and that led to a strict belief that every bad thing coming his way will be because pain is the only thing he deserves, and happiness was not made for a man like him. 

Michael empties his double espresso that tastes cheaper than the brew you can get at a grocery store. You make much better coffee, even if it's just a boring double espresso. 

But you are a good thing, and good things wither in his presence. He tries to shut the voices out, but after seeing Anna pass by happier than he has ever seen her before, they just grow louder.

He makes his way to Amanda and Jimmy’s house then. His hands are buried in the pockets of his jacket that still smells like you the day he lent it to you. His brown eyes are sunken as he crosses the corner to the street his family lives on – most of them, anyway. 

He rings the doorbell and the gate opens to let him in. When he steps toward the front door, Jamie greets him. 

“Hey,” Michael smiles softly. 

“Hey,” Jamie acknowledges him. “Mam’s in the kitchen, Da’s downstairs with Eric, Uncle Frank an’ Birdy.”

The boy doesn’t even question his appearance, so he probably doesn’t know about the fight that drove Michael and Jimmy apart only a few days ago, and neither does he seem to know about the call he made to Amanda before deciding to drive his life against the wall – if it weren’t for your desperate need to fix people, he would still be stuck there. 

He nods. “Thanks, Jamie.”

It is weird to see him so grown up after all these years. He’s almost his height now. The feeling of looking at Amanda or Jamie or the life his brother has built for himself is something he can’t describe, but it runs deep and it finds its way into his bloodstream to poison him. It makes his limbs heavy with the weight of lies and the unknown on his shoulders, and his heart turns into the cloudy Dublin sky. 

Michael steps inside. 

“Which one are ya here to see?” Jamie asks. 

“Your Dad,” he says. 

“Okay, cool.” He leaves just like that, with no questions, not even a glimpse of suspicion. 

Ignoring Amanda in the kitchen, he makes his way through the house and into the basement. The stairs creak slightly under his weight. The closer he gets, the more can he make out Frank’s voice. The wood of a cue stick hitting the object balls on the pool table fills his ears. Some of them seem to fall into the pockets, and he hears Jimmy clap proudly to himself. Frank’s tone of voice is concerned though, and Michael stops to listen. 

He’s come at just the right time because the next thing he hears is his name. “And what about Michael?” Frank asks. 

The sound of one of the balls flying off the table echoes through the room. Jimmy sets his stick down and sighs. “What about him?” he retorts.

“I’m askin’ you.”

“I’m not the boss of him, he made tha’ very clear.”

Their argument wasn’t even about that. Whatever Jimmy had been on that day, he chose his words to hurt him. Talking about Allison and Anna the way he did, and then talking about you as if there would be no good in being together with you cut Michael deeper than he showed at that moment, and he almost lost you because of that. Maybe he didn’t mean it, but he deserved that broken nose nonetheless. 

“Jimmy.”

“Wha’?”

“Whatever fight ya two had–” Frank begins. 

“It doesn’t matter,” Jimmy cuts him off. “I haven’t heard from Mikey in days. I dunno where he is. He’s not answerin’ my calls either.”

It’s Birdy’s voice next that tries to diffuse the obvious tension. “Maybe he just needed t’get away,” she says. “Away from all this, I mean. He just got out of prison. Cut the poor boy some slack.”

From the start, Birdy has always been the woman with maternal instincts, and Michael often found comfort in her kindness. She took care of him with a love he lacked during his childhood, and when he got out, she made sure the house didn’t look like an empty, haunted space anymore but that he could actually live in it again. She cares, and it shows in the way she speaks about him. He’s grateful, but he knows it won’t warm Frank’s heart the same way. He doubts the man is possible of positive emotions; he’s always been a rock, and he doesn’t care. Even the topic of family is just a job for him. 

As expected, Birdy gets ignored. 

“Is he still workin’ fer Amanda,” Frank asks, “washin’ cars like I told her?” 

“He was,” says Jimmy. “Until a few days ago, he took it very seriously. And then he left.”

“Good. Maybe he’s finally thinkin’ ‘bout what’s best for him, and that’s not washin’ cars. He belongs here, with us.”

Michael can only imagine Birdy’s disapproving glance. “He wants to get Anna back,” she argues. 

“He can do tha’ while he’s workin’ with Jimmy.”

“No, he can’t.”

“Birdy’s right,” Jimmy says. “Amanda tried tellin’ him she’d put him on the books but he didn’t have ta work, but he wants to. He’s takin’ this very seriously and I can’t say I blame him.”

“This is bullshit!” Frank stops to take a sip from his beer. “Ya’ve grown soft. Let’s jus’ hope Michael will come to his senses. We have bigger fish ta fry.”

He hears Jimmy scoff. “Wha’, like Eamon?” he asks. 

“No, Birdy’s new washing machine–”

By now, her eyes must be bulging out of her head with how hard she’s glaring. 

“Of fuckin’ course, I mean Eamon!” The glass of Frank’s beer bottle hits the counter of the small bar before he says, “And fuckin’ Moor, that bastard.”

“We’ve had this conversation before, right after Michael got out, remember?”

“We all remember tha’,” Birdy cuts in. “And I was seemingly the only one who cared enough about his well-being to check on him.”

“Yeah, Birdy, we know yer a saint,” Jimmy sounds almost bitter. 

“Don’t get smart on me now, Jimmy,” she says. “He’s your brother.”

“I know.”

“Eamon,” Frank says, acting as if the topics of conversation aren’t all over the place, “has us by the balls. We have ta do somethin’. Remember that dealer down on Parnell Street, hm?”

Silence follows. 

“Yeah,” he says, “he’s dead. He got shot this mornin’ around eight. While he was buying a fuckin’ drink at the gas station.”

Parnell Street. Michael knows a lot of streets by heart, that comes with the territory, but that name strikes a chord. The gas station on Parnell Street is about a fifteen-minute walk from Merrion. He knew before that Frank has people there, but Merrion isn’t just a street anymore. 

House number 13, that’s where you live. You drove past it before you parked a good length away from the café and he walked you there. That was at seven-thirty. 

He connects the dots and the second he does, his heart stops. 

Are you in danger?

Michael is convinced now more than ever that he needs to get out. He can’t protect you if he does the very same thing that he is trying to protect you from. He needs that job and he needs to try to distance himself. What if you get caught in the crossfire? Or Anna? He can’t relive the same hell again. It’s bad enough he dreams of that cruel night eight years ago every time he closes his eyes; he doesn’t need to add you to that list, too. He can’t bear to lose one more person he loves. 

“What do ya want me to do?” Jimmy asks, exasperated. “Want me t’start a seance and bring him back?”

“I need Michael,” Frank states. “We need manpower. He’s good at what he does. Not only does he throw a mean punch but he actually takes this shit serious when he needs ta. And he’s a damn good shot. He needs t’come back, otherwise–”

“Dead meat?” Birdy finishes.

“Yeah, dead fuckin’ meat.”

He steps out behind the shelf that has kept him hidden from their prying eyes. He doesn’t let him finish his sentence. 

Birdy is the first to catch a glimpse of him, her grim expression lighting up almost instantly. “Michael,” she says softly. 

He nods curtly, trying to smile, but he fails miserably. 

All eyes are on him now. He feels like an animal in the zoo, judged for existing, judged for being himself, and the only person excited by his sight is Birdy. She’s the one visitor at the zoo that seemingly enjoys every caged animal she sees. The sight of Michael’s dark features is not pretty, he knows that, but the looks he receives leave a bitter taste in his mouth. They pity him. He hates that just as much as silent judgment. 

“Hey,” he says. 

“How have ya been, pet?” Birdy asks. “Or more like where? We were worried ‘bout ya.”

She steps up to him and cradles his face. She traces the butterfly bandage on his forehead, chuckling a little, then moving on to the cut on his nose. She clicks her tongue. “How’s the other guy?”

It’s meant as a joke, but Michael takes it seriously. He looks at Jimmy, then back at her. “I’m grand,” he says. “And the other one’s good, too. ‘t was just a brawl.”

“Hm,” she disagrees, but she leaves it at a gentle hum. 

Frank’s smile is fake when he looks at him. “We were just talkin’ about you,” he says. 

He wants to tell him he heard, but he keeps his mouth shut. If he pretends he isn’t angry, maybe he can get out of this without any trouble. 

“Oh, yeah?” Michael asks. 

“Yeah. How’s the job?”

“Grand.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.” You asshole, he thinks. 

“You enjoy washin’ cars?” Frank is really pushing it this time. 

He feels so small under everyone’s eyes. Jimmy looks almost regretful and Eric is someplace else, his eyes focused on the snakes in the terrarium, but everyone else makes him feel so damn small. He feels his shoulder slouch, but then he thinks about Merrion Street, Parnell, the gas station, and then you. 

You. 

Anna. 

Himself. 

“It’s not bad,” Michael lies, “but I’ve decided t’work someplace else.”

Everyone looks shocked now, even though Birdy’s eyes scream more surprise than the sense of betrayal he sees in Frank’s eyes, and even Jimmy looks like he didn’t see this coming. Considering Michael was once willing to do everything they told him to, he doesn’t blame them. It’s a big chance for all of them, but especially for him. 

Change is good, change is what he needs. He turns it into a mantra or else he won’t believe it, cave, and then return to the same man he was before. The thoughts of, “They’re your family. Would it really be that bad?” 

But you would never approve. Or would you?

No, he can’t think like that. He wants to be just Michael for a while if not forever. 

“I came to tell ya that. I quit,” he repeats. “The job with Amanda, I mean. I quit that.”

“Come again?” Frank asks. 

“Yeah.”

Jimmy curses under his breath, “The hell, Michael?!”

Michael caught them off guard. Good. The almost defeated expression Frank carries along with his anger and exasperation almost makes him gloat. Maybe he is already gloating a little inside because he found something more important than blood, in more ways than one, and he is fighting for it now. 

He hasn’t fought for something in so long. 

“Where?” Jimmy collects himself first. “Where are ya gonna work?” he asks. 

“I’ve got somethin’,” says Michael, “that’s all ya need to know. That’s why I came here. I didn’t want t’ leave ya in the dark.”

“You came here to tell us ya quit the job with Amanda?”

“Yeah.”

“Pet,” Birdy prompts. 

Michael shakes his head. “I need to get Anna back. For tha’, I need a more stable job. Appease the courts an’ all that. I can’t let anything, not even the smallest mishap get in the way of that. I’m sorry, but I can’t.”

Would you be proud of him if you heard him stand his ground? He likes to think you would be. It makes the heavy heart he gets from the look on his brother’s face a little easier to just accept. He needs to burn bridges, not appease others. And this is one of the bridges that need to be incinerated. 

“Are you sure about this?” Birdy asks. 

“Yeah, I am,” he says. 

“Fuck,” Frank curses to himself. “Can we talk about this, Michael? Just for a minute?” It sounds like a question but it’s actually a perfectly concealed demand. 

Michael sees through his charade. He shakes his head again. “I made my decision, Frank.”

“When we put ya to washin’ cars, this is not what we meant to happen–”

“Oh, I am well aware of tha’,” he sounds bitter now, and he can taste the copper of blood from where he bit his cheek in an attempt not to yell or throw another punch. “Things change,” he says. “People change.”

Birdy tries to pour some water on the fire that is starting to consume everyone in the room, but it has been fueled by oil and gasoline and water only makes it worse. 

“Anna belongs with Michael,” she says. “I’ve said it before, but she’s a Kinsella. Mikey deserves a chance to prove himself to get her back, don’t ya think?”

Jimmy nods at the same time that Frank starts to shake his head. “Eric!” he calls out and his son flinches. He’s still standing close to the snakes. “Don’t ya have anythin’ constructive to say?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Michael says. 

Eric closes his mouth again. He doesn’t look like he wants to be there, anyway. His skin is sickly pale and he appears almost… guilty. 

“That’s all I came here for. I quit. I’m sorry.”

He’s not sorry. He feels sorry, but not for this.

“Maybe if we take a calm minute to think about this–” Birdy tries again. 

He shakes his head. “No.”

“Pet…”

“I’m sorry, Birdy,” and with her, he means what he says. “I can’t,” he says. 

On his way out, the weight that is lifted from his shoulders only lasts a few seconds before his brother’s voice puts twice as many bricks back onto his shoulders, dragging him further down. 

“Michael, wait!” Jimmy calls out. 

Michael clenches his jaw and halts. “What?” He turns around. 

“I’m sorry for wha’ I said the other day, about Allison and Anna and that girl Amanda saw you kissin’,” he says. “I was on edge and it wasn’t fair, especially not blamin’ ya fer Allison’s death. I know yer strugglin’ and I’m sorry, but ya can’t just leave because of tha’. It was just a fight.”

“I’m not leavin’,” he clarifies, “I just quit my job with Amanda. There’s a difference. I’m still here. Fer family.”

“Is there a difference? Ya’ve been gone for days. I was worried. We all were.”

“Were ya, really?”

They stare each other down. The rope of tension is so visible, it could be cut with a knife. 

Jimmy takes a step closer, his voice softer now. "Look, I didn't mean half of the things I said. I was angry, and I lashed out. I want you back in our lives. I want ya back where you belong, workin' with me. We're family, Michael."

“This isn’t about you, it never was,” Michael snaps. “This is about me and Anna and… and–” He knows he shouldn’t have said your name, but it slips before he can think, and his voice echoes through the house. 

“So yer still on about her?” his brother asks. 

He screwed up. You were just a stranger seconds before, and as a stranger, you were safe. Now Jimmy knows your name and probably everyone else, too, and being a Kinsella is already dangerous enough, he doesn’t need you involved with every single member of his family, but now that Jimmy knows you are one of the reasons he wants out… his brother might not become the problem, but Frank might, and Michael could shoot himself for being such a fool. 

He shakes his head. “Doesn’t matter,” he says. “Point is, I’m gettin’ another job and ya can’t stop me. I want t’be better.”

“We’re family,” Jimmy repeats. 

Michael scoffs. "Family, huh? Is that what ya call it when you drag my personal life into our fights? When you use my dead wife, daughter, and her against me?"

“Ya heard what Frank said about Eamon–”

“I’ll cross that bridge if it ever comes to it, but I’m not playin’ that game. I can’t get involved, and I won’t. Why can’t you just accept tha’?”

“Because Anna, I get, but this woman, Michael,” Jimmy says. 

His eyes darken. “Careful,” he growls.

“I stand by wha’ I said. This relationship is doomed. People have died already. What if someone starts a war? They’re not gonna give a fuck about whether or not yer goin’ straight now. You know how it is; they always find a way t’ destroy us and what we love. You’ve experienced it yerself.”

His words cut deeper than a knife. Michael's heart aches as he realizes the truth in his words — love and happiness within the Kinsella family come at a devastating cost. He stabbed a dagger straight through his heart and pulled it back out. As if the demons in his head weren’t saying the same thing, Jimmy had to go ahead and drill the hurt even deeper, the fear and the uncertainty. 

He thinks about Allison, her blood heavy on his hands. He went down too many wrong roads and ended at a point of no return. Now that he has found a way out, that way seems to be the same one-way street heading in another direction, but the end is still a huge wall he will run into, and then he will lose everything dear to him. 

But these thoughts are poison. They’re toxic. He can’t let them get to him, even though he has never taken his brother’s words more seriously. He’s always valued Jimmy, even when he’s angry. What he loathes is the truth of his words. It would be kinder if he was lying; it would make the decision so much easier. It wouldn’t make him rethink what he said, what he chose and is going to choose – he wouldn’t question what he feels for you, which is the part that tears ripples through his soul and the home you’ve made there, shaking his world and inevitably, yours. 

He understands the risks. But he yearns; he yearns so desperately for a chance at redemption. The threat of violence used to be his life, but now it hurts even him to think about the chance of the monsters jumping out of the shadows and cutting him and his loved ones apart piece by piece. He saw the worst of humanity and he knows it can get worse. 

The pits are sheer endless. There is no going back no matter where you are, no matter how hard you try to pull out - It's a door that reads "pull" but you push, and even when you pull, the door won't open. It isn't locked, you're simply trapped, and it's the same with his emotions. 

Michael knows he has a hell lot to lose, and he needs to acknowledge that instead of listening to the voice in his head that continues screaming, “Run!” 

But it isn’t him who should run. 

“I deserve a second chance,” he says. 

“Of course, ya do,” Jimmy says, “but–”

“No, that’s all. I deserve a second chance. Period. So does Anna, and so does she.”

“Michael–”

The sound of heels clicking against the floor follows the sound of a closing door. Amand rounds the corner, her brown curls swaying with each of her movements, and she stares at the men before her in bewilderment. 

Michael feels his throat tighten when he sees her. 

“What is goin’ on here?” she asks. “I can hear ya shoutin’ through the whole house.”

“Michael quits,” Jimmy tells her. 

It’s as if he had been waiting for a moment to snitch. Two against one, and if he adds everyone in the basement, he’s standing alone against five Kinsellas. Just because he made a decision. He chose something for himself. It’s almost as if they can’t live with that. 

“Quit wha’?” Amanda asks.

“His job.”

“What?” She crosses her arms and looks at him. “Michael–”

“Don’t,” he cuts her off. His expression hardens. "Don't act like you care, both of ya. Don't. You may mean it, but no matter what I do, yer just gonna continue sabotagin' every attempt I make at bein’ happy. I can't keep lettin' ya dictate my relationships. I won't let you ruin what I have right now. Don’t tear her away from me.”

Why he sounds like he’s begging, he’s not sure. But standing alone against the force of his family feels humiliating enough to shatter his confidence. 

“Is it about the girl?” Amanda asks. Her body is turned to Jimmy, asking for his approval, and he nods. 

Michael rolls his shoulders. He doesn’t want to get angry, he doesn’t want to hit him again, he just wants to go home – he wants to go to a home that isn’t a place but a person, and he needs it now. He’s not sure how he survived up until this point, but it’s getting harder to breathe as the current drags him down. 

“It’s about more than tha’,” Jimmy adds to his initial agreement. 

At least he got that right. 

“It’s about family and the choices you’re makin’, Michael.”

Michael's voice rises, finally, his pent-up frustration spilling over. "No, Jimmy!” his voice bounces off the high walls that turn into a microphone with the force with which he delivers his words. “I'm choosing myself, fer once,” he says. “I've spent my whole life doin’ everythin’ fer this family, but I failed the people I care about, I lost everythin’ and now I just want to fuckin’ fix things! I won't let ya tear me down just ‘cause you can't handle the choices I make."

"Michael, we all care about you," Amanda says. Her voice is gentle, but he often likes to compare her to a venomous snake. Her words can sound nice, but the meaning behind them can be deadly as soon as it reaches your bloodstream. "We want what's best for ya."

"What's best for me is to be with her, with Anna- I want to be just Michael. I wanna be free from this toxic cycle. I won't let you or- or anyone else dictate what makes me happy. I've had enough. This is my life, for fuck's sake, let me just have tha'!"

"But yer a Kinsella," says Jimmy, "You can't change that." His anger transitions to silent anger. "No matter how badly you wanna escape, you can't."

Michael turns on his heels. "Maybe not, but I can sure as hell try," he says, ready to leave the house behind. 

He feels trapped, not just in there but on this street. He feels trapped everywhere, the walls caving in around him. He's breaking, as is the world, the universe, and reality; everything seems to be falling apart, and he is reaching for the only lifeline he has. As he walks away, he can feel their stares burning into his back, but he no longer cares.

He thought he could at least breathe once he was away from the house, but then his walls are caving in, too. He’s started tearing what little clothes he has into a bad – just enough for a few days – when he feels the room… shift.

The air grows thick with his mounting anxiety, his heart pounding in his chest like a trapped bird desperately flapping its wings against a cage. His vision blurs. A sharp pain shoots through his skull, but it’s only momentary. 

Somehow, he manages to make his way into the bathroom. Maybe cold water will help, he thinks, but then the room shifts again and again and again, and his now wet fingers slip from the tap. The water is still running into the sink, but he can’t move. As the room shifts, so does his brain. He can’t think, his eyes only able to scan silhouettes, and his knees give out. His body betrays him. 

The world around him warps and distorts. The sound of running water turns into a shrill melody as if someone is blowing a flute directly into his ear. The tiles beneath his feet become unsteady, their patterns dancing and morphing before his eyes. His fingers twitch as he tries to somehow lean against the toilet, but he has no power over what he’s doing. The spiral keeps going further down, dragging him with it. 

Time seems to both stretch and contract, the seconds drawn out agonizingly, yet passing in the blink of an eye as his body convulses. He doesn't exactly register what's happening. Sometimes, it feels like he's watching himself seize uncontrollably from the outside, other times it feels like a very vivid dream and then there are times, like now, when he's conscious but also feels detached and not conscious at all. 

Fragments of pictures flash before his eyes like a movie. He feels the fear deep in his bones, and it turns into personified matter dancing through his daydream - but it feels more like a nightmare that doesn't belong to him like Freddy Kruger messing with his head and threatening to cut him up. The body he's in can't possibly be his own. He fears losing control; he fears being consumed by the darkness that lurks within his bloodline, and it grips him tightly. He fights against it, struggling to retain a sense of self amidst the overwhelming chaos, but he's tired. 

He's not sure how long he's lying on the floor, but eventually, his muscles ease up and he slumps. The world returns to his senses, but he still feels disoriented and takes a moment to realize where he is.  As he lies there on the cold bathroom floor, the tears mingle with the sweat on his face. He wipes it off his brow, but he is still sweating. 

It isn’t the first time this has happened, but he hates it more and more every time. If only he could understand what’s happening, but asking for help isn’t his strong suit and he has other things to worry about. His ‘episodes’, as he dubbed them, are the last points on the list. 

He’s not at home here anymore, Michael reminds himself because he doesn’t feel like it. He feels trapped in his own house. The bullet holes are so close, he feels he can touch him through the walls. 

And then he decides, he really can’t stay here anymore. Not tonight, at least, and not tomorrow either. His head is all over the place. In every corner, there is an invisible trigger and he is haunted by the ghosts of his past. They follow him everywhere. 

The past follows him everywhere but into your arms, and so he fights against the ache in his muscles to rise back to his feet and packs his bag. 

By the time Birdy comes around to check on him, the light in the kitchen is dark, the blinds are drawn close and when she knocks, no one answers. Michael is gone again, and she wearily leaves it be just like that – who is she to keep the poor boy from happiness? If he doesn’t want to stay, he shouldn’t have to stay. 

But that’s just what she thinks. She knows as soon as Frank or Jimmy finds out he has disappeared again, kindness is the last thing that will follow Michael wherever he goes now. 

When he tells you about it that night, he leaves out the part about Eamon and whatever else is threatening the existence of the family business right now because you don’t need to know that. He tells you about the fight and Jimmy and his decision to quit his job with Amanda and move on to be with Anna, and you listen without a word. 

You listen and when he reaches the point of talking about packing his bag, he stops. You think that’s it, that’s what you believe, and he wants to keep it that way. He doesn’t tell you about the seizure or the taunting memories. 

Michael ends the story at a point he knows will suffice but still keep you safe, and you don’t seem to notice that he’s holding back because damn it, he’s crying, sobbing even, and all you want to do is comfort him.

He feels guilty for lying again, but it is for your own good. If you knew what was going on right under your nose, close to your own home and close to your heart with him here, you wouldn’t be able to deal.

But there are things Michael doesn’t know about you, and he can’t even begin to fathom how wrong he is about you not being able to deal with the violent lifestyle of his family. No matter how scared you might appear, it is not always because of the reasons he thinks it is. 

You’re a good liar, excellent even, but there is a gut feeling inside of him that won’t go away, and he holds onto the hope that one day, he will learn who you truly are, as much as you wish to know who he truly is. 

Only then can you both be unconditionally happy with each other – honesty is key, and it is still lacking in every one of your conversations.

Michael just hopes you will be able to survive whatever rocks life might throw your way because losing you is not an option he wants to concern himself with – in more than one sense. 

Tagging: @bellaxgiornata @shouldbestudying41 @your-not-invisible-to-me @glowstick-lesbian @ms-murdockswift @acharliecoxedfan @loveroftoomanyfandoms @mattmurdocksscars @roseallisonparker @1988-fiend @norestfortheshelbywicked

[wewebaggit]

ST5 Will Byers Bingo (Guesses ofc)

Will has natural powers and his connection to Henry/Vecna/001 predates his abduction.

OR the connection exists cuz of the vine but henry/vecna /one figured out will had powers AND he tried to abduct him.

OR Will was in a trance n maybe he was being abducted as a vecna sacrifice before he figured out some new method? I still dunno how the sacrifices came to be the chosen method?

The abduction was possible thanks to El inadvertently opening the gate and Vecna kidnaps him after putting him in a trance like Max. So the shed thing never happened in RU but was a trance. The gooey shit found there. Honestly, no clue. The demogorgon? Idk.

Brenner put in the Soteria into Will in the UD/outside and put him back in. Idk. Hence, Will recognising Brenner. I don't think he's a lab kid.

The Soteria in fact weakened the connection between Vecna and Will and hence the next time he went after Will he had to commandeer the Shadow Monster to possess him. However, he was unsuccessful again and the shadow particles were exorcised from Will.

ST3 is a big load of bullshit, cuz the puberty monster chose to go after people done with puberty and really was a half assed attempt at some metaphor that didn't travel. However, it succeeded in copying El's powers which he needed for opening gates.

Will was ignored because maybe the shadow particles that remained weren't enough to possess him. Like he had needed the whole ass shadow monster to go inside of him in ST2. So, he created an army of the undead or whatevs. Infecting them with .......... puberty or something. Idk. Also, El was present this time. Or maybe he got alerted when she looked into Billy's mind.

Vecna wants Will to create his new world and no longer needs El. So kill her I guess. Easier in general for him. Not like he needs to open/close gates anymore.

Brenner is tracking Will. As the Soteria subdues powers and tracks location or whatever. He doesn't really need Will cuz he wants to kill Henry. He's useless for that. He just needs for Will to not know of his powers and regain his memories. Just needs to stay away from Vecna till he kills him/subdues him. Whatever was his plan.

But he needs El to kill Vecna in the first place.

Phone lines blown up? Well they were literally blown up after the shit that took place there. Not that there would have been anyone to answer anyway. Now Mike whining about it before that? I think he lied.

Henry/Vecna/001 and Will meet. Duh. He appeals to Will's kindness and sensitivity and tries to win him over by revealing his powers. Removing Will's soteria maybe?

Meanwhile nobody is aware of Will's powers n him being the Creator God lmao. They think it's veccy/el. Also because they're all separated from Will atp. I think the veccy/will confrontation is gonna be an intimate event and not an open for all soiree.

Maybe it entirely happens in his head. (guesses n wishes whatevs)

By the time everyone does figure out abt Will tho, it's already to late. In that Will and veccy real meet up has happened.

I don't want no fuckall everyone protects Will shit happening, i want his importance to be a twist for ALL. It already isn't for the audience so at least for the characters on the show.

What else? Swear I had many jumbled thoughts n guesses n this is all i can think of right now. Might add to it later.

[luvstruckmutt]

🌟 + stanford and if you're also taking characters not listed then the pine twins also :3 and also 🌟 + frisk I wanna hear about so many thangs

YAAAAY HI EIFFEL I LOVE YOU EIFFEL THANK YOU FOR SENDING THIS IN

ask game

ford:

stanford and mutt are so everything to meee😭

they have a lot of history and neither of them are perfect humans so their relationship is a little complicated

when they first meet each other mutt puts ford on this crazy pedestal and basically thinks he can do no wrong.

puppy looooove

mutt just believes so strongly that he's the most wonderful and smart and kind person in the world for helping them manage their lycanthropy

this causes them to be blind to a lot of ford's flaws lol

mutt is a very emotional person who needs a lot of communication and support in order to feel secure in a relationship

they have an anxious-ambivalent attachment style and are therefore kind of clingy and get super nervous when they perceive ford as not giving them as much attention as normal

ford doesn't really notice this because, though i love the man, i think he might get a little awkward and not be so good at handling others feelings

since neither of them are doing a good job at communicating what they're feeling, the two of them end up eventually having a falling out around the time that ford and bill start getting really close

after ford returns to gravity falls in 2012, the two of them are reunited after 30 years

now with mutt having a more developed sense of self and being more able to regulate their emotions and ford able to communicate about emotions better, the two of them develop a more healthy and stable relationship where they actually talk about how they feel with one another

overall they are both two nerds who love each other very much

they may have had one extremely long rough patch but you better believe that the two of them are using all their combined brain power to work it out and get back to where their relationship was before! :3

pines twins:

these three initially have a very rocky relationship.

because of mutt working at the tent of telepathy and his constant fighting with stan, the twins really don't like him at all and kind of just see him as one of gideon's goons

after the season 1 finale, however, mutt is free from fear of gideon exposing his secret and ends up working at greasy's diner instead.

after he ends up helping to expose gideon and starts getting a long with stan, mabel warms up to him pretty quickly

both are lovers of crafts and all things sparkly and cute so they bond over their shared interests

dipper remains suspicious of mutt for longer, especially after he finds something that connects him to the journals, but eventually starts to like him once ford returns and vouches for him being a good person

overall mutt is kind of like a third uncle to the twins and feels very protective of them!

frisk:

WAHHHH MY LITTLE BABY

wish is so protective over frisk because like, THATS A BABYY THATS JUST A BABY EVERYONE STOP FIGHTING THEM NEEEOOOOOWWWWWW

follows them all throughout Waterfall because what if they get hurt????????

tries distracting undyne in order to protect them

this doesn't work very well but hey, at least she tried lmaoo

sneaks frisk free food from MTT-Brand Burger Emporium whenever their hp gets low because thats where she works ^^

[12th-shavie]

So I've been playing Radiant Historia Perfect Chronology lately and I have many thoughts that plague me

Spoilers under the cut

All of this is from reaching both basic and true ending, the PC ending with the singularity, all side quests, possible history quests and no second run with clear data for the extra ending. Also I played it on friendly difficulty and it's a good thing I touch at the end of my thoughts.

I mostly want to ramble about the different characters in the game, in somewhat of an order so I'll start with my dear boy Stocke.

I really liked Stocke. He's not particularly chatty, but we get to see a lot of what's going on his mind through the story, including every decision he has to make that can lead to a bad ending and he ends up very well-rounded by the time of the ending. He clearly grows to care a lot about everyone around him, which makes his fate particularly cruel when it's only because he made all these connections that he can be the sacrifice, but it's also the reason why his sacrifice is such a heavy blow for the others. His status as a man whose soul hasn't been his for a long time unbeknownst to him heightens the value of his growth as a person and as a friend, showing how he could still grasp the opportunity to see value in the world beyond himself and his own lifespan (that was technically over since quite some time). He's willing to use the power at his disposal to try to get the best outcome for anyone he can help, even when it seemingly doesn't do much for the world at large, he's just really helpful. Stocke is also very funny to me in the many ways he deals with his time travel. Especially in the ways he casually transports a bunch of items through the timelines, and never explains how he knows information he has absolutely no way of knowing at the point in time he's in. He also doesn't seem to question the fact that there's a big part of his life missing, or at least that's what I understand the Ernst memory wipe as, and seems to just adapt to whatever the timeline has in store for him at any given time. But he's also a Sad boy™ and deserves the world for everything he's been put through. Especially having to kill Rosch that one time.

Ah, Rosch. My poor sweet bulky boy whom I really tried to use every time he was available but it seems it was never enough and even in post-ending he's not quite caught up. The mana spring dlc also shows just how big his armor truly compared to his actual body and I respect the huge suit of armor that makes his silhouette a little silly. I wasn't a big fan of his romance with Sonja at first until the alternate history in Celestia and his bigger arc, where we get to see some more of them that made me appreciate them more (and Sonja upgrading his Gauntlet has to be some of my favourite interactions between her, Rosch and Stocke).

Raynie and Marco are cute as characters Stocke is close to but I really couldn't care less about Raynie's romantic subplot, or her in general. My interest in her never rose higher than my interest in her gameplay, which is thankfully fun to me so it doesn't feel like she's wasting my time. Marco was a little better, especially with the Mimel sidequest where he shows another facette of himself in the bad ending where he goes nuts and I respect that. But ultimately, they're only involved at first because Heiss made it so, and neither their past not their relationship to Stocke or the others was delved into all that much, which is kind of a shame given how present they are during the game.

Which bring me to Heiss. Heiss' first appearance just threw me in a loop of "wow, this guy is so obviously evil but he called Stocke his best boy so now I really want the game to surprise me with a turn of events where he's not one of the Big Bad™. I really wish I could trust this guy in the slightest but that character design is screaming EVIL very loudly". He then proceeds to turn out to be the main villain. Except he still very much cares about Stocke, and always has, even when his other intentions are very nefarious. And even at the very end he still cares about his favourite nephew. And I'm a sucker for that kind of character development, so needless to say Heiss now lives rent-free in one of my mental tabs that run in the background on my thoughts. He does have one portrait where he looks down, in a content but sad way, as if reminiscing of a happier past and it really gets me every time. I did not expect to care so much about the guy, yet his character arc really did it for me. From the bitterness cranked up to eleven by the Black Chronicle's past owners and his huge soft spot for Stocke to his own actions of granting Stocke a chance at a non-royal, non-sacrifice life that he himself never got as Heinrich being the key to the only positive future there was for the world ? Gorgeous arc ! Until the true end where he just never gives up on the only thing he truly cared about, Stocke's future. The PC ending where he joins forces with Stocke, Nemesia and the others was also a satisfying moment, seeing how he's reminded of when he went on adventures with Ernst (again with that softer portrait I am very weak to), along with one of the possible histories where you get the key to his desk (which had plagued me from the moment I tried to snoop around his office much earlier in the game) and it contains an old portrait of Heinrich and Ernst, probably the only trace had kept from that part of his past, showing that despite all the scheming and lack of remorse on other fronts as the main villain, he's still an old man whose life was never completely his own, and who tries to break the cycle for the one person he cared about who was condemned to the same fate. In other words, Heiss is absolutely a magnificent bastard but also very human underneath and I am not immune to that.

On the other hand, a character I had to warm up to gradually was Eruca (I've seen her design from the DS version and I feel robbed, that little sprite had so much more personality !). She starts out kinda generic, as the princess stuck under the terrible reign of her stepmother who secretly leads her dead brother's rebel group, and I only started garnering interest when she joined the party and was armed with a gun. I had gotten a gun before but had no idea they were for her, and it was extremely refreshing to see how she fared in combat despite her lower availability. Her relationship with Stocke was also made so much better by that one moment around the end where it goes back to their first time meeting in standard history and shows exactly what she was dealing with when interacting with Stocke, knowing full that he not only was her dead brother living with a borrowed soul, but also had yet to be aware of his role in the grand scheme of things. I was afraid the whole ritual bit would get in the way of her character development but it didn't and she ended up being one of my favourite characters in both story and gameplay. Ice magic nukes are very nice.

Aht is adorable and I knew she'd be in my top three from the moment I saw her in the animated opening in which she gave me some Just a little guy™ vibe which is sufficient for me to be interested. Her voice acting was also very endearing (then again all of the voice acting worked really for me) and she was just as fun in gameplay with her trap set-ups and big combo potential. And then the story dropped all sorts of hints that she clearly was aware of something very big and plot-relevant and that really makes her go from Babsie™ to Tell me your secrets you adorable little scoundrel™ and that's absolutely my jam.

I wish I had a stronger opinion on Gafka. He's pretty neat, I like the combos he brings to the tables, the way he learns additional skills with Bergas makes sense to me and is cool, but I wish his character spoke to me more. The one thing I would say about him is that he has this trait where he has a hard time distinguishing humans and uses nicknames based on other visible parts of them, but does eventually come to recognize Stocke with his name instead of "Red One" and that's a new bit of development he got there.

I wish Viola was playable. Girl's got so much potential with a title like the Valkyrie but only gets so little story presence, but she's a highlight of every scene she's in and that's fine by me. I find her design very soft yet powerful and inspiring, as befits a character with her renown and charisma.

I can also say I really appreciate Raul, he's not the most appealing character at first, but the genuine effort he clearly puts in supporting however he can from the back lines and devising all of the larger scale tactics and stuff really elevates him as guy who's trying to make the best out of a bad situation where he can't turn his back on people who need help he can provide after not opposing Hugo more directly even though he suspected him to be up to no good.

Speaking of Hugo, he has me a little confused on what exactly his motives were, where his loyalty lied and what he was really trying to accomplish, especially regarding Noah and the possible histories surrounding him. I'm not a fan of letting him around with Noah and not facing more consequences for his actions. Noah himself is also a little weird, being both this mysterious prophet who just wants what's best for his people and this calm guy who seems to know more than he lets on but hasn't really tried to stop Hugo or find another way to reach the people without his name being exploited. I wonder how he could've affected the timeline if he didn't just vanish from the public eye after the possible history that saves his life in the alternate history.

Dias and Selvan are most definitely meant to be read as an evil power couple. You can't throw in a sidequest where it is shown they get a hotel room in the middle of the day and Selvan immediately resorting to threatening to kill a little girl the instant he sees Stocke menacing Dias, and not tell they're not in some kind of very close relationship that is never described as friendship, not even once. Also they'd seemingly betray anyone in a heartbeat except each other and I will read the subtext as I please. There is also that one line from Selvan in alternate history when Dias is dead and he says something along the lines of "But now Dias is slain, and I am broken". And that's without mentioning the possible history where they didn't set Protea up as queen but Dias directly, and an NPC says that "Dias wears the crown, but Selvan might as well sit on the throne" and I'll gladly interpret it as Selvan sitting on the throne with Dias on his lap. Moving on.

Friendly difficulty is a godsend that should be in many other games. I love being able to progress rapidly through the combat heavy parts of the story and only be forced into important fights which I can appreciate without wearing down my gameplay experience. I cannot show grateful I am to be able to enjoy the story to the fullest with no downsides in my opinion. It even gives me a reason to someday try out the DS version to experiment with combat a little more, and also see the game in all its original stylized glory (mostly Stocke's grittier self, Eruca's pixie cut, Heiss balding forehead that makes him less magnificent of a bastard and Dias looking less evil for some reason)

I also intend to finish RHPC with my clear data to see that final final ending, just to see what it brings to the table.

[mamamittens]

I'm contemplating what to do for Hancock's jewelry and bouncing ideas in my head for the two new Oh Sweet Child requests.

Pending thoughts for jewelry

I'm thinking something like a choker but it's a snake that gently bites the end of its tail. I've long had a motif that folks connected to the RA have a pearl somewhere in their jewelry so maybe the eyes?

Perhaps some scales are gemstones depending on what kinda snake I do though keeping it mostly gold would match with her usual tastes ngl.

Considered a hanging chain from the fangs to a teardrop ruby that is meant to hang between or just under her breasts. I forget if there's a specific name for this but it's usually only done to compliment a plunge neckline or draw the eye to the breasts in general for women--I've never seen this in men's jewelry fashion unless you count dog tags or a ring that is meant to hide under a shirt when desired. Maaayybe 'drops' of rubies down the chain as a sexy intrigue piece that also hunts at how damn dangerous this woman is to get close to.

Okay, so thoughts for Whitebeard's platonic end

I'm not entirely sure on what I'll have for his. Maybe reader has a bad dream (cliche I know lol) and ends up talking to him in a little heart to heart.

Oh! Or maybe reader sneaks out when everyone has passed tf out during a party to try and either escape or get fresh air without being hounded. Idk. Depends on when this takes place cause at the end of Sweet Child they've pretty well resigned to sticking around.

Anyway, party walk, the reader thinks everyone is asleep but as it turns out, Whitebeard tends to be a very light sleeper when on deck and it leads to a soft conversation.

I've tried very hard to not have too much detail in reader's past so it's not specific to anyone--no mention of family or friends--but I have mentioned some vague nothings about "shit choices" implying the marine enlisting wasn't entirely by choice. I didn't have any specific plans for that or secret btw, I just needed something to give the reader a reason to not fold immediately into Whitebeard's crew.

Anyway, I thought it'd be sweet if part of this heart to heart is a conversation about wanting to have a choice in a world that very much doesn't really let you have that. Not knowing what they want to do with their life because they haven't had the ability to put much stock into the future--which is ultimately why they're so passive about their fate despite having a desire to leave.

Which naturally leads to Whitebeard talking about the different reasons he "adopts" his children. The one relevant to the reader is protection and a desire to see them flourish. He didn't seem them out but he knew when they arrived that he wanted them to be apart of his family.

Maybe he suggests they start writing about the many dangerous animals they seem to have a natural ability to charm. At the very least, it gives them an excuse to go after them and well... It's hardly the most dangerous hobby any of his children have picked up Whitebeard adopts feral pirates almost daily he feels kinship at how much reader loves things that could and would rip them to shreds.

And finally Izo.

Izo gives me the most trouble because as far as I'm aware of he's a fan of his guns and he likes cross dressing--if only just in cosmetics and performing traditional Japanese activities that are usually reserved for women like dancing.

I'd need to double check that last part honestly but that's where I'm at right now for understanding his character.

And he hasn't really shown up so I don't have any real basis for his stance on the reader--nor do I have any direction for the request. But I feel like he'd admire the reader not caving into the crew quickly given that it shows they do have dedication and standards.

But I'm pretty lost in bonding for either romantic or platonic senses. At least without getting into conversations about gender which would be difficult to dance around without assigning the reader a specific gender outright.

I know from comments most assume the reader is female and in rather hoping that's because the readers are mostly female as opposed to me missing glaring red "THIS IS NOT A MAN" flags... Which would make me sad cause y'all it's really hard to write some of this stuff without committing to a sex or gender 🥲

But! The point is that from the sounds of it so far, at the very least the reader doesn't typically do any of the cosmetics associated with feminine presenting fashion. So I'd need to be very careful in phrasing to avoid breaking this without talking about "well I'm a dude and dudes don't usually wear lipstick where I'm from" or "I was never a girly girl growing up" cause of the obvious reasons (at least I hope it's obvious).

I'm just not sure what kind of common ground they'd bond over so there's a strong chance it'll be a bit before Izo's comes out, unfortunately.

Perhaps a conversation about duty? And growing last what you'd previously assumed would be your entire life??? That'd be interesting and a unique point only the marine!reader could come from given the drastic difference from marine to full on pirate.

Anyway, I need to sleep now before I completely fuck myself up for work Monday lol

Btw, Melody hasn't been forgotten I just set it down for a moment while I consider how/if I'll drag out the next part before I move Koala into the story.

[thegodofkhaosinkarnate]

Okay, but if i recall correctly, each character in Dancetale has their own style (I can't remember, is 'sparing' dancing with them in their style or blending the two styles together? I'm pretty sure genocide route is overtaking the other person, outshining them and making it about you). So. Apply that to the incoming AUs. Everyone has a different style they dance in.

Nightmare in a slow, menacing waltz that drags you across the floor, forceful and draining. He always tries to lead, to pull the other person along, leaving them exhausted. Maybe some particularly hypnotic baroque, always at arm's length.

Dream forming beautiful ballerina arcs, mimicking the lines of his bow and arrows, lifting others up off the ground. He'd probably have a very English style, with a lot of light movment. Based on his canon age, some renaissance dance with a heavy emphasis on well-synced partners and quick bounces might get thrown in.

Ink. Oh, Ink. You know there's this thing literally called Ecstatic Dance? It's a sort of freestyle dance where you follow the motions of the music without thinking, in the hopes of entering a trance-like state by connecting with your emotions. Yeah, Ink would do that. It would be so difficult to follow to.

Error would do the most concerning looking robot ever. Pop and lock that looks like he is breaking the laws of physics and his spine. He snaps backwards, his arms flow like they're made of ribbon, then cut back into rigid angles. It's not a partner dance, it's not meant to be cohesive, and it looks like it hurts.

Fell would probably have a much rougher style, something really aggressive looking. I hesitate to say capoeira, because from what I've seen of his AU, I don't feel like he really puts his heart into hurting people. Maybe a really aggressive form of break-dancing? Like krump (that name makes me laugh)?

Lust gets put in Dancetale? Watch the fucking deathdrops, this guy is vogueing his little soul out. Can't decide which style he'd like, but he will be flaunting it. Maybe a little bachata in their if he wants to get real close.

Swap/Blue is, in many ways, like classic Papyrus. If Dancetale Papyrus does Tango, Swap might do something like Salsa. He moves with the other person, always active and full of energy, wrapping them around into spins with a constant momentum. If not that, then lindy hop, cuz that's got a bounce to it that I think he could get behind, not to mention at least one person being lifted off the ground.

Cross is a swap-inspired variant, so again, I think he'd go more latin dance. He's more reserved than Swap, so a more classic ballroom rumba or cha-cha might work. Close to his dance partner, but never too close, regimented and paced in its steps. Very orderly, very careful.

Killer I could see going the way of breakdance. Maybe Reggaeton? He's a lot more energetic and active, but not very... flashy? As far as I can tell. So a style that's more active and a little sharp, jittery sometimes, not really partner based.

Dust, for some reason, seems like he'd do russian style ballet. It's quiet, it's precise, it takes a lot of skill and training. Harsh kicks, tight spins, incredibly sharp movements and high leaps. It's controlled, with no erratic movement.

Horror is hard to place. Based on canon, he's cold and calculating, with occasional bursts of violence caused by his mood swings. He's rough, but more intelligent than a lot of fanon gives him credit for. I could see him doing something partner-based, maybe some sort of square dance or quickstep? Or a slow dance that gradually gets faster and more aggressive until it turns into a really aggressive tango. Milonga that slowly creeps up on you, but he ends it by biting the other person?

Fresh is doing a mix of things that were popular in the 90s. Hip hop, specific fad dance moves, a little vouge. He's so loose and flowy and full of energy all the time. I think he'd maybe add in some disco if he was getting serious. This guy does the best sprinkler you've ever seen.

And Classic, of course, dances blues style- slow and relaxed. Unless he's getting real serious, then I think he could take in into full jazz swing, hard to keep up with. I don't think Classic Sans would be a breakdancer the way Dancetale Sans is, just because I don't see him putting in that much speed or effort into it unless he has to.

You know how Dancetale battles are just. Dance battles?

Yeah, take that, now also make dance fights a very literal in world mechanic. ( Dancing isn’t optional when fighting )

Great, now make it so that anyone who enters Dancetale and participates in a fight is also forced to dance 🙂‍↕️

[so-long-soldier28]

I was watching a Avengers and I thought of Kai. If you do watch them, which character do you think is the most similar to him. Would he be a hero or a villain?

So I've only seen about half of the MCU.😭 There's so many, I find it hard to keep up. (I've seen the Iron Man(s), Captain America(s), the first two Avengers, the first movies of Ant Man, Spiderman, and Black Panther, Black Widow, and Hawkeye and the Sam/Bucky show what's it called.) [Not like you asked for all that.] But can answer from the characters I know!

First off, I would love to see him be a hero, but I think he'd be a villain. (Maybe he'd end up like one of the villains that some of the heroes learn to love [like Bucky].) Or, he's one of those villains that has a specific skill that the heroes end up needing to defeat the Even Bigger Villain, which puts him in the gray area. But generally, I think he would kind of piss off most of the Avengers, and he might be a little too sociopathic for their style.😅 (I can picture Tony Stark losing his absolute shit if Kai makes one more snarky comment.)

As for similarities with the Avengers, I can see a couple to whom he's alike. I think he has a lot of the same boy-ish behaviors as Peter Parker. (ha, and they have the same last name.) They're both still really young and learning how to adapt to their new realities. (Peter becoming Spiderman; Kai escaping the PW & then becoming coven leader.) They both have someone in their life who they seem to look to for guidance, despite that person not always having patience with them. (Peter with Tony; while it's not explicitly stated, Kai's always seen hanging around Damon, regardless if the man wants his company or not [6x16; 8x13]). Lastly, back on the boy-ish behaviors point, both have a girl they're trying to impress, and both have things that make them really excited in a child-like manner. (Peter with Legos and the Spiderman suit; Kai with Twitter and his spells, every time he's given the chance to have magic.) (And let's not forget about Kai's stash of Alex Rodriguez baseball cards.)

Aside from Peter, I mentioned Bucky earlier. Kai is similar to him in the way that he was a killer at one point, but then tried to redeem himself. To some, no attempt at redemption was enough to warrant forgiveness, but some others grew lenient / grew to accept him. (Tony will never forgive him for killing his parents, but Bucky had the support of everyone who fought for him in Civil War. He became very close with Sam later on. Kai, unfortunately, had his redemption arc stripped from him, but if it were given, I could see him and Damon being at least frenemies. In season 8, Caroline hears him out about his childhood, and had he not later tried to kill the twins again, I think they could've connected through that. Other characters, like Bonnie and Alaric, will never forgive Kai.) The only other similarity that I think these characters share is tragic backstories.

Finally, I have one last point to make, being that for some reason, Kai gives me Clint Barton vibes, but I think that's entirely just because both characters can be sassy. Clint always manages to make me laugh, as does Kai, and I think that's the only reason they are alike. Maybe it's also the bow and arrow, considering one is Hawkeye and the other used this weapon for one scene and never again. I can't explain my thinking here, it's just pure vibes. 😅 Kai certainly would not have the same stable relationship nor amount of kids, but both characters sure are sassy. The similarities start and end there.

So... I definitely did not mean to make this this long, and I hope I even answered what you were asking, lmao. But I think, in summary, he's most like Peter Parker, but like... sociopathic... Maybe Kai would be in an Avengers movie where Peter has to fight his evil twin. 😂 Maybe by the end of said movie, Peter manages to get through to him, or Kai's denied his redemption arc again and gets even more murder-y. (Actually, that concept might be fun to explore.)

Anyway, thank you for the ask, and sorry for the long-winded reply! It took me a day because I had to think about it, but I might've thought too hard. (But hey, it was fun to think about!)

[throne-anguis]

The Persona au gets a bit more tragic as everyone is just some guy and as such everyone is just living their own lives and trying to get by. They aren't soldiers they're just people.

*points to the fire when Hikari was 13* I'm already thinking that fucked over so many people's mental health because everyone was so young at the time. And if we're following canon then Jin Mei died shortly after, either through a Mental Shutdown or in my head, simply prioritizing Hikari's life over his after he watches what he inadvertently set up spiral out of control and tries to atone through saving Hikari. So we have Kura dying, Hikari blacking out for the first time and learning that he may have caused a fire, and Jin Mei dying shortly afterwards

Already that goes and just traumatizes so many of the characters in one way or another. I can already see Hikari and Rai Mei, and to a minor extent Kazan and Ritsu having aversion to fire. Or at the very least have them constantly check buildings for working fire escapes and fire extinguishers. And already I can see Rai Mei having heavy guilt over not being to save her brother even if she couldn't do anything at the time.

(Hikari: Hey quick question does this building have-

Kazan: I checked 7 times. It has fire extinguishers and a working sprinkler system and I made sure the owner will have the systems checked again by the end of the month.)

Partitio went through poverty and that sucks. That really sucks and it's likely due to his Pop's business closing down and. You can't really fix that well in the real world. You can't beat up your landlord to get them to give you back the money. You just have to deal with it and move to a city and hope that you'll do better there. And hope that you don't sink further into poverty because- You can't afford health insurance at the moment. And it sucks.

Throné is coming out of a gang and she doesn't know what to do with herself. She cut off all ties but that cut off so much of her support system. She doesn't know what to do with herself and she's trying to figure it out but it's hard because she was used to doing what Mother and Father told her to do and she misses her siblings but knows that it will be so much worse if she goes back. She has to stand up on her own now, even if she doesn't know what that means.

Everyone and everything feels so much worse because they're so painfully normal. We take away the Persona elements and we realize that a lot of this is people trying to make their way through life and either having a support system or not.

When cold hard reality hits and the sadness comes with it. They are all in tight situations and even the modern day setting has an impact on that (Partitio being unable to afford health insurance). He can't fistfight a train outside the Metaverse. Partitio is known for his positivity and him striving to save poverty but I can definitely see him getting scammed a lot. He's too selfless, somehow. A huge contrast to everyone else on the team.

I love that exchange between Hikari and Kazan. Kazan acting as a caretaker to him in a way. We've definitely established that before but I'm a sucker for the dynamic they have. The only one who knows about his trauma initially and he is just trying to keep him sane (for his own reasons, but Hikari still finds comfort in it while he is unaware).

Jin Mei sacrificing himself for Hikari both traumatizes him and destroys a part of him. He'd rather put himself in danger and having at happen at 13 messes him up. Rai Mei probably still blames him here and he struggles to keep connections with his friends who he is basically living for. Ritsu's betrayal follows...

There are much bigger threats out there but I wonder if Rai Mei later in the story could become a confidant. He talks his way to get to her in the game but I could imagine her having an entire palace built on fear. Maybe Hikari tries to get to her early on when he's new to learning his powers and may give up realizing she isn't the biggest threat here. Throné may snap him out of it saying that they don't need her help and she realizes that this guy is clinging to his past too much. She only has little information but she has definitely overheard some of Kazan's conversations with Hikari and has done some digging herself. She's an ex Blacksnake after all.

Throné basically leaving her gang like an abusive family hits hard. Also fuck "She has to stand up on her own now, even if she doesn't know what that means" hits hard. No support system, she's just trying to (start, maybe) an 'honest' life that she doesn't understand, with all her ties cut off. After landing one job she realizes why she was a Blacksnake and wants to whip out her knife already.

I can see her getting into confrontations because of this. Luckily she is good at keeping out of the eyes of the law but she is struggling and probably resorts back to stealing. Hikari would never do anything about that other than make a few comments because they're in it together, but he's just stuck wishing their lives were happier.