#i thought maybe bc it made such an impact on me i'm remembering it as a bigger part of the essay than it is

[callixton]

i especially like that david tennant got the 57 academics just punched the air line w shakespeare bc i know abt the longass romeo essay he wrote in 2005ish and the not insignificant part of it about mercutio's unrequited crush on romeo

[luveline]

Ok Derek angst what about a non-bau gf getting jealous of his flirting with Garcia? Bc ngl if my bf did that with a girl who I hadn’t met I would be super upset and then May be his gf meets Garcia and realizes she’s a girls girl and super sweet? Idk u can take it any direction

ty for your request ♡ fem!reader

You don't want anything to do with Penelope Garcia. Honestly, you wouldn't ever meet her if you had your way, but you're level-headed enough to know that she's important to Derek. Integral to his life. It's a miracle you put off meeting her as long as you had. 

At first, you genuinely thought she was Derek's mom. He always ended calls with, "Love you, mama." It was only a few weeks ago when he shook things up to say, "I love you, babygirl," did you look up from the book on your thigh to ask who it was.

"Penelope," he'd said, like he was confused. "Who'd you think?" 

You shrugged noncommittal, earning yourself a hair pet and a kiss. You lay awake that night wondering if you got it wrong. You'd heard a hundred stories about her and felt reluctantly fond, but now? Your boyfriend calls other girls pet names, what do you do about that? What can you? 

You ignored it. And now you have to meet her. 

She doesn't seem as nefarious as you've imagined her, springing from her seat at the cafe table to hug you. "Hi! Oh my god hi! I can't believe I'm finally meeting you, I've never been this happy in my life! You're so pretty!" 

You wince at her arms thrown over your shoulders but reciprocate. You aren't a total bitch.

"Thank you," you say. She smells like coffee creamer and hairspray. She pulls away to beam at you, her lips painted a shiny, pretty red. "It's nice to meet you. Derek has nothing but good things to say about you."

It sounds awfully formal, like you're opening a bank account with a teller who has a shared acquaintance. Derek gives you a look. You give him a look back, mutual confusion. She may be his best friend, but you don't know her (and what you do know you're jealous of, so). 

Derek takes your hand despite your off behaviour to show you off with pride, his teeth peeking from behind his lips milky white. "My two favourite girls had to meet eventually."

"I thought I'd be more jealous about coming second," Penelope says, eyes twinkling, "but I've never seen Derek so happy." Her voice turns scratchy like stretched linen. "He deserves the best, you know? And it's clear you're it. He's smitten."

"Maybe don't give up all my secrets, sweetheart," he says. 

Seeing them together chills your raging envy. There's a lot of love there, clearly, but the sexual tension you pictured is fictional. "Girl code, my love,'' Penelope says with a shrug. She winks at you. 

Insecurity nags at your skin like condensation on a cold window, "You've known Derek for nearly six years? Have you guys always been this close?" 

"Well, mister muscles here didn't bother remembering my name for the first couple of weeks that we worked together, so he deferred to pet names. And, you know, he's him," —Penelope gestures to him as if to say, behold, drawing a startled laugh from you— "and I'm me, so. I didn't want him to stop." 

"Hey, now." 

Penelope shakes her head at you. "He always does this." 

"If 'this' is stopping you from talking bad on yourself, babygirl, then yeah. I'll always do it." 

You feel clarity break, the sweet taste of relief and the muggier lick of shame. Derek and Penelope have a special friendship. That you knew before meeting her. She's made a huge, irreplaceable impact on his life, and Derek has clearly done the same. They aren't playing work husband and wife —there are reasons for their affections that go well beyond the surface flirtation. 

"I get it. Nobody ever called me anything so nice as Derek calls me," you confide. Derek's eyebrows leap up. You've never told him this; you're telling Penelope as a sort of apology, though she can't know that. "I never got asked out growing up. When he asked me on a date I thought he was trying to win a bet." 

Penelope's expression flickers with relief. There and gone, quickly replaced by sympathy. "Are you kidding? You're so pretty, Derek's lucky he got to you before someone else did." 

Derek kisses your cheek. His lips linger against the apple of it, your joined hands pulled instinctively to his firm torso. You might be imagining it, but Derek seems to know everything, so he probably knows the hill you've just climbed in your head. "Damn straight I'm lucky. I'm surrounded by beautiful, genius women. This is paradise for the modern man." 

You flush at his touch and praise. Penelope makes a pleased squeak. "Ooh, you guys are cute! You need to let me take a photo. This'll make a great printout for your wedding."

"Penelope." 

[shakingparadigm]

The thing to me is that i dont know what to expect anymore. After round 3 everyone first conclusion was probably that ivan would die for(or bcs) Till so i was waiting for something to subvert my expectations but no they played it straight.

“Luka vs Till is no competition”” They wouldnt do romh twice” now im not so sure.

Also I see the doomed toxic yaoi but I cant with how good my boys look 😭 Till in black or jacked + fingerless gloves, mullet ,maybe little bangs, ivan in white full coat , slicked back hair. They look so good.

Ivan's hair being slicked back was the only correct answer after we saw Till's long hair down. He looks so damn good actually. I know he died but at least he served one last immaculate outfit before eating shit.

Dude. I was the exact same. Ivan dying in this way was genuinely the most predicted outcome of ROUND 6, so I thought... surely it couldn't be so easy... VIVINOS must have another card up their sleeve! Yeah! The card up their sleeve was the same card they were fucking holding in their hand already because they PLAYED IT STRAIGHT. I laughed myself silly after watching the video because it just made sense. We expected something more complicated, more devastating, more drawn out than Ivan just straight up dying this round. VIVINOS set up the possibility of a jailbreak and we ended up getting too comfortable. Just because Mizi was successfully rescued doesn't mean lightning will strike twice. Ivan dying was a massive blow, yes, but an underrated frame that holds the same amount of devastation is the shot of Hyuna and Mizi hiding, Hyuna bleeding from the side. They were there. They tried to save them and they couldn't make it. They failed. And they don't even know that they failed yet because Hyuna was shot. If they played Ivan's death straight, they certainly subverted expectations with Mizi and Hyuna's jailbreak. They weren't even a part of the main video. They didn't even make it to the stage itself. And honestly, that's realistic. Of course things end up going wrong, that's just how it is. The hope for a jailbreak made the pain twice as impactful when Ivan starts getting shot. There's a sense of hopelessness watching it. They saved Mizi before her execution, surely they can do the same now, right? Where are they? We really got too comfortable with the idea of a rebellion rescue, we failed to remember that in the end, they're only human.

Well, now we're at Till vs Luka. Can't say I'm shocked. I'm just gonna sit back and see how everything unfolds from here. I'll try not to make castles out of playing cards next time.

[aspd-culture]

I wish I had the stereotypical aspd that empaths talk about. The calculative and well groomed businessman who’s incredibly independent even at the cost of other people.

I’m honestly a useless loser. I don’t do anything for anybody yet am livid when they don’t do something for me, 80% of the time I forget or don’t do the tasks I’ve been asked to even if it’s the simplest thing. I pass it off to other people. I get threatened by my parents constantly, called useless and a lazy fuck. I’m not motivated for anything, not employed and the thought of it makes me want to rip my skin off or rip their faces off whenever they mention it. It feels like another extension of control. Everything feels like an extension of control and an excuse to assume power over me.

People in my life are moving ahead of me no problem and I’m still stuck on my ass debating whether to break everything in my parents house when they use my lack of employment and symptoms to make fun of me. My friends talk about it like it’s just so simple to suck it up and march forward and I loathe them for it because they don’t understand.

Maybe this is just me being a whiny brat or a bad person

No, this is you struggling with being in a toxic environment - one that will continue to make you feel like this for as long as your parents act that way towards you. It's not possible to heal and recover and learn to process your symptoms and change your behavior in a toxic situation like that. It's likely keeping you in survival mode.

Truly I think in that situation the best way to get yourself to do the things you would need to do to leave the toxic situation is out of spite. Spite can do a lot for pwASPD when we harness it to use for good, since our PD is so reactive to it. If you think to yourself as though you're talking to them "ha, yeah okay sure I'm getting a job just like you wanted right? Except I'm doing it to get the hell away from you", you might find yourself more able to get to do those things. It's not guaranteed to work, but it's something that might help.

And, if it makes you feel any better, prosocials don't actually like us in that stereotype either AND generally ppl who fit that stereotype are in some other way coping destructively. No one who actually has ASPD is managing to not struggle at all with it bc a disorder can only be diagnosed if it significantly and negatively impacts your life. It's important to remember the stereotypes of this demonized disorder are made out to be supervillains - hyper capable beings who choose to be monsters - bc otherwise the prosocials have to admit that they're bullying people who are hurt and wish we could stop dealing with our symptoms just as much as they wish we didn't have them if not more. It's not fun for them anymore if they think about our actual struggles with ASPD, so they try and make it sound like we're having the time of our lives when none of us do. I promise you're far from alone.

It's also worth noting that if you find yourself entirely unable to work without your mental health destructing, that that's called a disability and there are things you can do to either get accommodations or potentially payment for it bc unlike your parents by the sounds of it, the government understands that mental health is a valid reason one might not be able to work.

You're not a useless loser - you're a person with a disorder that is known to be potentially disabling who is being mistreated and stuck in a toxic environment - at least going by this post.

Plain text below the cut:

No, this is you struggling with being in a toxic environment - one that will continue to make you feel like this for as long as your parents act that way towards you. It's not possible to heal and recover and learn to process your symptoms and change your behavior in a toxic situation like that. It's likely keeping you in survival mode.

Truly I think in that situation the best way to get yourself to do the things you would need to do to leave the toxic situation is out of spite. Spite can do a lot for pwASPD when we harness it to use for good, since our PD is so reactive to it. If you think to yourself as though you're talking to them "ha, yeah okay sure I'm getting a job just like you wanted right? Except I'm doing it to get the hell away from you", you might find yourself more able to get to do those things. It's not guaranteed to work, but it's something that might help.

And, if it makes you feel any better, prosocials don't actually like us in that stereotype either AND generally ppl who fit that stereotype are in some other way coping destructively. No one who actually has ASPD is managing to not struggle at all with it bc a disorder can only be diagnosed if it significantly and negatively impacts your life. It's important to remember the stereotypes of this demonized disorder are made out to be supervillains - hyper capable beings who choose to be monsters - bc otherwise the prosocials have to admit that they're bullying people who are hurt and wish we could stop dealing with our symptoms just as much as they wish we didn't have them if not more. It's not fun for them anymore if they think about our actual struggles with ASPD, so they try and make it sound like we're having the time of our lives when none of us do. I promise you're far from alone.

It's also worth noting that if you find yourself entirely unable to work without your mental health destructing, that that's called a disability and there are things you can do to either get accommodations or potentially payment for it bc unlike your parents by the sounds of it, the government understands that mental health is a valid reason one might not be able to work.

You're not a useless loser - you're a person with a disorder that is known to be potentially disabling who is being mistreated and stuck in a toxic environment - at least going by this post.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

This one is so long I'm putting most of it under a readmore to save your dash

Anonymous asked:

AITA for stabbing a kid?

(this is less Am I The Asshole and more Was I The Asshole, bc it's really just a story from high school that I - as an adult in my mid-20s - was remembering recently and thought could be fun to toss to The People in as objective of a form as I can. anyways, all names are 100% made up to replace actual names, and everybody involved ends the story safe and alive)

I (16ish F then, 20s NB now) was trying to prep for an upcoming speech and debate tournament (yes, I was insufferable as a teen) with a group of other students in our debate coach's classroom. specifically, I was working with a younger student, Tammy (14ish F then), on understanding this specific type of debate (LD for my fellow insufferable teens out there) and brainstorming with her on some of the main components of her own case. as we were trying to work, another student, Tony (15ish M then), kept butting in to pester Tammy, making it impossible for Tammy or me to focus. in hindsight, I'm like 74% sure Tony had a bit of a crush on Tammy in that moment and expressed that feeling by being an annoying little shit towards her (as teens often do). that was at least how I would characterize the general vibe of Tony's actions and how he seemed to really need Tammy to be paying total attention to him. from my perspective and based on my basically decade-long memory at this point, Tammy (maybe?) asked him to leave her alone. she at least seemed frustrated and annoyed with him, or just generally flustered in a way I read uncomfortable. (take all this with a grain of salt here bc, regardless of how Tammy really felt, I was for sure super annoyed and that fact would almost certainly impact my interpretation and memory of the situation.)

idk if any teen girls out there (former, current, or future) have tried to teach or learn while a teen boy is flirt-bugging you or the person you're with, but it got old real fast for me. so, almost immediately, I asked Tony to knock it off so me and Tammy could work. he refused and kept bugging her. I continued to tell him to quit and he continued to ignore me, and this went on for a while. so, as one does, I figured it was time to threaten him with physical violence. I told him that if he didn't back off and let Tammy work, that I would stab him.

now, to give a bit of context for what the fuck I was thinking in that moment, I had learned a particular lesson earlier in my time as a supposed teenage girl dealing with supposed teenage boys in the 2000s-2010s: don't make threats you aren't willing to follow through on. so when I threatened to stab him, I 100% meant it. to provide a tad more context, I did also have a bit of a casually violent streak in high school for this reason (but maybe those stories are for a different AITA submission at another time, but they were all in a similar vein as this one in terms of cause and severity). also, does it help or hurt to add this was in a rural public high school in Texas? either way. to be fair to Tony, that's still undoubtedly a deeply unhinged and disproportionate thing to actually do, but would be a semi-common hyperbolic empty threat to make as a teen to another teen.

as you can assume based on the title here, Tony did not quit despite these threats. so, true to my word, after us arguing back and forth for a bit more, I stabbed him in the arm with the pen I was holding. he was obviously upset (to be clear, it did hurt him but did not injure him to the best of my knowledge beyond leaving a light mark for a bit of time that afternoon*) and he complained about having been stabbed. I said I warned him repeatedly that I would stab him before I actually did, to which he replied that that was an insane thing to actually do (fair enough, ya know?). the teacher was in the room, but if she saw any of this she ignored it. tbh, I don't see how she could have not noticed a kid loudly complaining about having been stabbed by another kid. so, I assume she chose to ignore it, possibly bc I was a bit of a teacher's pet (ie. president of the speech and debate team she was the coach of (I told you I was insufferable)). actually, now that I think about it, that was not the only time I stabbed another kid in her classroom in almost identical circumstances... maybe we are both TA....

anyways, in conclusion:

reasons I think I'm NTA: he was being an annoying dick to the friend I was mentoring at the time, and I did warn him that I'd stab him if he didn't quit being an annoying dick several times before actually following through (and it was only with pen and did no serious harm, but I think it does still count as assault regardless (?) and also I love the classic AITA storytelling technique of Being Dramatic, so feel free to ignore this point and *any other times I brought up that he was ultimately okay when considering how you wanna vote).

reasons I think I'm TA: I mean... I fuckin' stabbed a kid just bc he was being annoying and I fully got away with it bc the teacher liked me, plus I was a repeat offender of doing lowkey violence like this in response to other kids being Kinda Annoying and Shitty™. pestering other people on purpose bc you possibly have a crush on them is a very normal thing for a teen to do. stabbing another teen with a writing utensil just bc they did so though?... perhaps not.

(also, as an endnote: just to be clear, I do not stab teens at all in any context whatsoever since growing up. out of AITA-writing-character here, I think I was a kid who was just sick of guys around me crossing boundaries and dealt with that in a myriad of very unhealthy ways that were also informed by my general redneck upbringing that - understandably or not - sometimes saw some violence as a valid way to assert personal boundaries if it seemed they weren't being respected. that doesn't make it okay and is not at all a defense against being TA in this story, just trying to assure folks that regardless of whether you think I was TA I am now also a somewhat well adjusted adult who at least channels their overwhelming fury into organizing/activism stuff and mutual aid rather than stabbing annoying teenagers. while this isn't some stressful conflict that I feel torn up about or anything even close to that, I am interested to see what folks think, so thanks for reading if the mod(s) found all this worthy of posting for y'all!)

What are these acronyms?

[moon932]

I feel like Vautrin as a character gets passed by a lot in the fandom, which is a shame because he is such an interesting part of Neuvillette's past in Fontaine. And in my (very humble) opinion, I feel like out of all the characters he probably had the biggest impact on Neuvillete.

(more thoughts under the cut)

First thing that stands out to me with him is that he's the only other human character that is mentioned to have been close to Neuvillette. And most likely the first human, outside of Furina (which she both does and doesn't count? idk it weird), he would've met and grown close to when he came to Fontaine ~400 years ago. And this is interesting to me because we know how this story ends and I wonder if he is partially the reason, or maybe he just reinforced the idea, that Neuvillette abstains from forming close relationships?

Think about it, Neuvillette and Vautrin worked closely for years. Hoyo likes to be vague with their timelines so idk how long they would have been working together, but it must've been substantial for Neuvillette (who is an immortal being, so time probably feels different to him) to remember and reminisce about. We're both shown and told that they both had great respect for each other. Also one of the biggest things that stick out to me with the trial part of the story quest, is the noticable emotions in Neuvillette's voice as he juries over the trial. Which yes we know that trials make him emotional which usually manifests in the rain, but this is the first and only time (I think? pls correct me if I'm wrong on this) that it's noticeable in his voice.

The last big thing I think about isn’t the trial itself necessarily, but the way Neuvillette talks about it in the fortress with Wriothesley. I think this is more specific for the english dub bc Ray Chase, instead of saying “And I believed he had every right to feel that way.” he changes it into present tense: “I believe he had every right to feel that way.” Ok this one may be a bit of a stretch because they essentially mean and get across the same thing, but it’s so interesting that it’s changed to present tense. And honestly? I think it works better with the present tense. Because Neuvillette doesn’t condemn Vautrin for the emotions he felt, (which wild theory but maybe he was channeling his emotions towards those he killed and not necessarily towards Neuvillette? so out there ik) if anything Neuvillette seems more then ok to readily accept them and the fact that they are (supposedly) directed at him.

Some other minor stuff that always makes my brain start to whir is that while the parallel were drawn between Vautrin and Carole / Traveller and Paimon in the quest, I do think it’s more fitting to say Wriothesley and Sigewinne are a more accurate parallel. Is this a slight critique on main character privilege? Yes.

If you’re wondering why I’m fixated on this it’s because Neuvillette is a character, that while his interpersonal relationships are sparse, they’re usually a lot more complex and often deeper under the surface. Neuvillette and the melusines are some dynamics that I wished Hoyo explored more often because I would love to know how to the melusines view Neuvillette more in depth. (If Sigewinne’s voice lines or character stories touch on this please let me know! I’d love to read them.) I have barely even touched on Neuvillette and Furina because their relationship is such a complex mix of trust and fear and pain and love. Not to mention Neuvillette and Wriothesley “The words unspoken are the flower.” Okay sir, keep your secrets I see how it is.

Do I think that Neuvillette always had the idea that the Chief Justice must remain impartial in any circumstances running through his head when he first took position in Fontaine? Yes, but I do think that the trial with Vautrin may have exacerbated this thought and made it more of a lifestyle type thing. Or maybe Neuvillette believes all his relationships from then on may be set in a perpetual cycle of grief and loss because surely nothing will out live the sovereign of water, the original god of life itself?

[dayurno]

sorryyyy for bringing some type of discourse to your inbox but I just giggle whenever anyone brings up the fact that nora soad andrews a misogynist and their only argument is the fact that he's friends with renee and dating neil who said women are the strongest ppl i know, like i don't personally think he's a misogynist, but i feel like there has to be better arguments for it😭

maybe it's bc the fandom gets on my nerves so I'm more sensitive to any attempts a defanging and making characters more palatable bc I'm not a fan of the widespread fanon versions of the characters also it's sad I feel like the fandom made some sort of progress where discussions were being had about the problems in the series and now after tsc came out it feels like we're back to where the author can do no wrong and it's hard to criticise anything

what do you think about tsc being a triology, I feel like two books can hopefully give Jeremy the depth he needs i remember you found him a bit flat as well when you read the book, I see a lot of people saying he needs to have a mean side or a traumatic past but I feel like a kind, nice character can be interesting without those things and not every kind character needs to have this secret mean side anyway, personally I groaned out loud when I found out it was a triology bc that would mean the fandom would be alive for longer and it's so crazy out of any book fandom I've ever been in for some reason the aftg fandom feels the most obnoxious maybe it's bc the books deal with heavier topics close to the heart so there's more feelings involved🤔the only book fandom who has pissed me off a comparable amount would be asoiaf but that's a whole different thing

I really do try and be happy I'm not even in the fandom anymore and I've never followed aftg twitter accounts and I don't even check the tags I just go on certain blogs but i still see things it's horrible💔like I can't believeeee we're still discussing if Kevins a coward or not and how selfish he is for leaving the nest like we've already argued about this to death on tumblr back in like 2016 now it's the same thing again💔

LOL i understand honestly so many of these discussions are repackaged wide-spread 2015 opinions which don’t reflect the original text that it’s hard to do anything except use the we have this thread every week comrade image and let it go. andrew being misogynistic is not even hard to come to terms with considering it’s not an interpretation or a headcanon it’s the author’s own words and will for the character incorporated into canon. there are things to disagree with nora sakavic for, but ultimately there is a difference between disagreeing with the author and willfully ignoring the intention with which a character was written

& i didn’t really care much for the news, i think the lack of planning and the rushed way the books are coming along are grating on both the author and the fandom, but i don’t blame her for wanting to get this done and over with. it will show more insight on jeremy hopefully, but unfortunately i already don’t care 😭 i think the route tsc took was in general uninteresting and pedestrian enough to not warrant a second thought, and i’m not particularly interested in any plotline beyond what pertains to kevin and the ravens. what surprised me really is the total lack of impact tsc had on the fandom, which is to say, i think it was so in line with the same 3-5 headcanons passed around the last 10 years that it has genuinely done nothing for anyone aside from the people who were already very invested in jean and/or jeremy. it feels like a different fandom from aftg altogether, which i’m happy about if only because it keeps us all locked in different cages, but it still baffles me to see people dedicate so much thought to a book whose characters bar jean are, as of now, the very definition of Nothing burger. all in all the answer to that question and most questions pertaining to tsc is Who cares. because literally who cares

LMFAO staying away from aftg twt is really good for you & honestly all of us. it’s still so funny to me that not even nora sakavic herself wanted to touch that mess. mentally ill white suburbanite teenage shut-in echo chamber ass fandom

[riseofthecommonwoodpile]

Hi Izzy! I remember back in the day you were a big fan of Sunspring and wrote a beautiful piece discussing it and talking about AI art. Do you think any AI art has surpassed Sunspring? Have changes in the development of AI changed your perspective on it at all? Asking bc I love that essay and I’m very curious :) thx

(context for those who don't know, Sunspring is a short film made about 8 years ago that used a relatively early LLM to generate its script, which was then filmed with a real cast and crew. if you want to watch it here it is, it's about 9 minutes, i highly recommend it)

i've thought about Sunspring a lot as AI art has become such a big topic in the past year or so, and I think the pieces i wrote about it i still stand behind, though i got a few things wrong that i'll bring up when i answer the second question.

to answer the first question: i personally haven't see any AI art that has impacted me emotionally nearly as much, but i also kinda dropped off watching new movies (most of the new-to-me movies i watch are found footage horror movies, 70's porno-chic also-rans, and shot on video movies from the 90's), and i would wager that, if i could somehow experience all of the AI art that exists, there'd be something that hit me in the same way again. there's too much of it for that not to be the case, and too many genuinely creative people experimenting with it. that said, what was so beautiful about Sunspring was how imperfect the tech used to create it was. Almost all of the script makes grammatical sense, but the way it flows, the directions sentences go, the phrasing used is so strange that the friction between the failures of the tech to be truly convincing and the actors trying to bridge the gap to make it still work is what was exhilarating and moving. as the models have gotten better and better, as the rough edges smooth off, that tension so often has just faded into a bland beige unflavored oatmeal of average aggregate language. some of the phrases in Sunspring that have stuck with me the most ("I think I could have been my life", "Whatever you want to know about the presence of the story, I’m a little bit of a boy on the floor.", etc.) wouldn't be created by any of the most popular LLMs today. they're too idiosyncratic, the phrasing is too odd, the grammar almost but not quite there. the plot is surreal and associative, the structuring bizarre and dreamlike. the lines Sunspring ends on— "He looks at me, and he throws me out of his eyes. And then he says he’ll go to bed with me."— are some of my favorites in any film, and it's because they are abstract, poetic, like the computer stumbled upon a phrase so evocative that no written-by-committee script would've let it through. he looks at me, and he throws me out of his eyes. this man who is supposed to love me looks at me in a way where his love of me has gone, where i'm barely even seen as me. it's not the kind of sentence most modern LLMs, with their focus on being convincing, are designed to create.

as far as the second question, i think the biggest change in my perspective is how my belief in the technology, both good and bad, has curdled. i bought into the hype that the technology would progress to the point where screenwriting could be turned into an assembly line, and maybe after that the rest of the parts of filmmaking as well. i had hoped it would become a new collaborative process between human and technology, and i feared it would become a way for movie execs to pay people less and eliminate jobs. the first i haven't seen much of, and the second, while certainly the dream of so many boosters of the tech, has largely been a failure (though plenty, plenty of people have still lost their jobs to LLMs despite that, and as a labor issue i still think it is a very important area of focus). i was too caught up in the possibilities that i didn't bother to research who was making the tech, where the money was coming from, what growth in the sector would look like materially, etc. i still believe LLMs can be used creatively, but most likely any interesting art coming from them will emerge out of models custom-molded by artists to have some of those same rough edges i loved in the first place. i think, in terms of mainstream film, any use of AI is in service to the same bland competence the rest of the industry is mired in, a determination to make products for everyone that inevitably become products for no one. i've become a lot more cynical about the trend towards mediocrity in entertainment, and that cynicism is due at least in part to much of what i've seen come out of the AI space. i do not have a knee-jerk hatred of the tech, but it has not at all panned out how i had hoped or dreaded.

[wattemeer]

oh my god I've been following you for years now but you totally disappeared from my dash at some point and you just reappeared bc of that kagehina web weaving post and i was like wait i know that name. so much of your kagehina art lived in a dedicated folder on my old phone because looking at it just gave me an inexplicable amount of comfort and I'd just scroll through it whenever I felt hopeless. and i remembered that comfort all of a sudden while looking at your art again and it only took me a second really; I tried to rationalise the softness i get by looking at your art, which I'd never thought about too deeply before, and. my god. it feels exactly like being with my girlfriend did. the girlfriend who's my ex now, who I'm kind of still not over, who's still one of my closest friends, for whom my heart aches daily. and it made me so sad and yet softer still, you art has this tinge of profound nostalgia now that I've found it again, or maybe it always did. I don't know. it hurts but i want to thank you. sorry for the rant, and the nonsense, i should really be asleep. have a good day/night. <3

Duuuuuude ok this one's insane i can't believe anyone would have such profound feelings for my art damn 😭💞💕 to know it had/has such an impact on someone idk that means the whole entire world to me

Thank you so much for this like, truly. i had such a sad fucking day today bc something terrible happened in my family but this.. cheered me up a lot haha :')

[cherry-alive]

So, okay, I made a post a bit about this yesterday, but I've had a lot of thoughts since then and a useful conversation with my therapist. So. Complaining about dyspraxia below

I haven't been formally diagnosed with dyspraxia. It's actually pretty much the only diagnosis I've given to myself without at least medical confirmation. But I've given it to myself based on both a lot of research and comments I have received from medical practitioners (e.g. my pediatrician commenting on my weak grip, not meeting developmental milestones on time, comments from teachers, etc). And today my therapist said she's pretty sure I have it based not just on what I've reported but what she's observed in the way I physically interact with the world over the years, so that was helpful and validating. And we contacted my doctor today to hopefully get a referral to an OT, who will be able to actually assess me, which would be very cool. Because I still doubt myself all the time and go "you don't really have this" except like...I do though lol.

Part of the reason I doubt myself about it is that it hasn't had that much impact for many years. But recently, that has changed, and I've realized that it's not that I got better, it's that I went on disability and stopped trying to do a lot of things I used to do and spent like all day on my computer and got assistance with most physical tasks. I'm doing much, much better mental health wise lately, which is amazing, and as a result I'm engaging more and more with the physical world around me, whether that's going on walks or to the grocery store or cooking or dressing nicely or eating in restaurants or trying art or whatever. Which is great!

But it's all. so. fucking. physically. difficult. Not in an exhausting way, in a coordination way. Pushing carts at the grocery store? I bump into things constantly and get really overwhelmed by it and a few weeks ago dropped a glass bottle of olive oil that shattered all over the aisle in the store. Cooking? I love to cook, but it takes me at least 2 to 3 times the time to make any given recipe because I know myself and know I can't multitask so I do all the prep all at once up front, and slowly at that bc cutting vegetables is hard. Putting on makeup? Better set aside 10 minutes just to try to put on lip gloss without going outside the lines. Going to a restaraunt? Often a mortifying experience where I a) bump into other tables and/or b) have food all over my shirt by the end of the meal, which is so embarrassing but I've struggled with it my whole life. And it's just. It's all really really difficult and often I feel so ashamed when I drop something or bump into something or get messy or whatever in public and it just...it just sucks. And I get so so so frustrated and flustered and overwhelmed when I'm trying to do basic tasks at home like hanging up clothes or whatever and it's just so difficult and frustrating for me.

And I had forgotten how hard it all was because for years I just spent all my time on my computer. But I'm not doing that now. Which is great! But I trip and stumble and knock into things and get lost outside and can't do the things I want to do and I'm just constantly reminded that the physical world is very challenging for me. My probable dyspraxia has really been interfering with my life lately in pretty significant ways that have surprised me, I had kind of forgotten how frickin hard it makes a lot of things. I consider myself able bodied for the most part but I'm remembering now that like...not exactly 100% actually. And it just kind of sucks. A lot.

The good news is that as I mentioned, we contacted my GP about it and hopefully I'll get an assessment and maybe even some OT and/or PT, which could hopefully really help me. Because I'm trying very hard to recover and regain some independence, and this is proving a more significant challenge towards those goals than I had expected.

[littleblueberryartist]

One personal gripe I have with TLT was that Annabeth mentioned that monsters often posed as doctors to medicate Demigods and dull their battle reflexes.

Cuz like as much as I love the series for being my first exposure to ADHD/dyslexia/neurodivergent representation. And the fact that it was about positive representation and solidarity in that.

Demonizing medication is,,,,,

So anyway canon is a suggestion and I'm going to ramble about my neurodivergent demigods thoughts (mainly focusing on ADHD because that's what I personally have)

My mini retcon is that Annabeth was misinformed and distrusting of adults because of her past

And like. Annabeth grew up at camp which is full of other neurodivergent kids that get it and accomodate her. It doesn't make her learning disabilities less disabling at times, but it likely meant that existing unmedicated didn't impact her nearly as badly as Percy or any of the other kids that weren't year rounders. So I think her views on the matter would be more detached as a result. She was also really young and I like to think she learns better in the future (maybe when she starts college bc the self directness of tertiary education hell is how I got diagnosed lol)

I wouldn't be surprised that monsters might try and disguise themselves as doctors, since if they're looking for demigods, that would be one way to find them. But I'm taking the "most doctors are monsters to try and medicate the half bloods" lore and throwing it out the window actually.

If anything I think it'd be better if it was more like. A representation of the doctors that won't listen to their patients, or the ones that maybe leave it *all* to the meds to help the kid or placate parents because believe me for a lot of people, me included, just meds are not enough.

I'm not completely sure how I'd go about it? Maybe they're trying to be doctors but because they're actually monsters they're not actually doing a good job??? Something about the importance of finding a good doctor??? But anyway that's the gist

Medication is not a cure all and it won't turn you into a zombie unless your dosage is wrong or the specific type of medication isn't for you. It's is so important to still have it as an option even if they're not for everyone and not demonize something that can genuinely help (even if the side effects can suck at times rip)

And like jokes on you my ADHD makes my thoughts jump so quickly that even if I notice the little things I will simply be on the next thing before I process. What battle reflexes? At least with meds I can focus on the things I notice djfjfjfjf

Anyway now that that's been covered onto the other ramblings!

Correct me if I'm wrong but I vaguely remember Percy talking about how his willpower crumbles at caffeine and how ironically soft drinks calmed him down (it's not ironic Percy it is simply how ADHD be sometimes)

So like

Even if the campers aren't medicated I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of them self medicate with caffeine anyway like a lot of irl ppl do. (I've tried to self medicate with coffee a couple of times before I got diagnosed tho it always just made me sleepy)

I'd like to think that the Romans do actually have really good adhd healthcare bc as much as they're about battle and honing your skills they also have a whole ass city where you don't have to worry about monsters. Part of the reason ADHD is disabling is the environment, and in the books it's also what makes them good and necessary for a battle scenario. But these guys aren't battling! They're living peacefully in the city! So like I think they can afford to "dull one's senses" a bit.

This also extends to good healthcare in general. They're a society of largely neurodivergent people, which often come with other co-morbidities so it would make sense for them to expand to accommodate those too. Not to mention they're warriors, likely resulting in a good number of physically disabled residents. So it makes sense for them to cover all of that and have accessible infrastructure.

As far as I'm aware there was no confirmation whether legacies were neurodivergent and they make up a good chunk of New Rome. But!!! Since a lot of neurodivergencies (especially the focus of the books ADHD and dyslexia) are hereditary I'm gonna go ahead and say yeah lmao

Anyway new worldbuilding challenge let the Apollo (both Roman and Greek) kids work together with the Hecate/Trivia kids to make an ADHD med equivalent without as many of the irl drawbacks or smt I would kill to be able to focus without the cost of hunger be gone and meds crash superhell

[gothicafish]

Umbrella academy s4 thoughts [spoilers]

- so like we all agree that thing with five and Lila was wack right ??? Like the dude that has been fighting apocalypse after apocalypse with his only motivation being his family, s-c-r-e-w-s his sister in law ? Ik him and diego don't have the strongest bond but you really want me to believe he would not only screw Lila but hurt diego like that? You also want be to believe Lila, who flocked to a whole other point in time to deal with her feelings for diego (among other things) Would cheat on him ? She rebelled against the women she knew as her mother for him ? Wack

-maybe I'm just a lil slow but it literally didn't make sense foe Lila to take her family to the subway to "save" them. If the cleanse would destroy every other timeline then the subway and every other timeline within it would have been straight up obliterated; it would have made sense if she did that so they would have to see the umbrellas die ? But in that same thought wouldn't it have been more meaningful for the whole family to die in this timline together and then the family that is SUPPOSED to exist will ?

- listen I like the touch that the siblings exist in some capacity in the new timeline but no marigold supposed to exists in this time at all so like? Huh?

-they did my Boy ben so dirty like a million times. I like that they explain his death and I think the way he died is entirely plausible cause Reggie SUCKS; and I can get behind the concept of the cleanse and the only one timelin thing but the way it was executed was not good in my opinion; someone said on here (I don't know who I'm sorry I rarely look at usernames! But if you know lemme know!) That it would have made more sense if the only one timeline to exist was one in which the umbrellas are born natrually and live the lives that they would have if Hargreaves never interveened. They also said the umbrellas would have some kind of deja vu or tether to eachother which I think is a nice, wholesome touch :)

- I was kinda expecting them to do more with the being born thing. I was also expecting them to mention that five and Luther are twins (revealled in the comics; I belive in hotel oblivion)

- I don't know, I feel like a lot of the side storylines five with the CIA, five with Lila, diego realizing he wants to be in a loving household and be a loving husband again only for that to be completely thrown in the trash by whatever happened in the subway :p, Luther living in the old, condemned umbrella academy (?),

-I feel like with past seasons they really focused on the fact that Luther never left and all he knew was being number one so I feel like after everything with the sparrows and Sloan he would have not gone back to try and fix it

Allison with her film career, I thought that would be more meaningful than it was and also the fact that Ray left her and just doesn't explain why or even why he doesn't even see Claire? (The actor that plays him probably didn't have time but like any amount of explanation would have been good)

-the fuckin subway was practically useless ? I thought the entire umbrella academy was gonna be stuck travelling the timelines but it was introduced and it ended that that was that. (Really upset that we didn't get a fun timeline montage but whatever)

-my OG theory was that they would be trapped jumping through different timelines trying to get to the original one and fix it that way and lowkey I wish that was the story we got

-despite ben and Jennifer and the cleanse being the main storyline I really don't remember most of it. It wasn't impactful and it didn't feel like a real threat even when it was literally absorbing everyone.

-were Gene and Jean really necessary beyond being the "antagonists" and just a way to make it harder to get to ben ?

-[edit 1] I need to know the biological properties of marigold. Bc for things to work out the way they're supposed to (umbrellas not existing) marigold has to be able to create a new egg, and be able to fertalize itself. But that would lead me to think the umbrellas would be born aliens, but we know they're not because we've seen them bleed red. So in my mind it makes more sense for marigold to only be able to fetalize eggs already in the uterus and fast tracking the pregnancy, meaning that in some capacity the umbrellas would still have the ability to exist because they already exist inside the uturus ? Maybe I'm reading too much into that one

-I have to know what happened to Leonard Peabody in the meant to be timeline I don't know why I'm just really curious about him since he kinda set apocalypse 1 into motion

I think the actors and the crew did really great work playing their characters and bringing the work to life but I genuinely believe the narrative and characters/development was throughly messed up by poor and lazy writing which is unfortunate because I really had high hopes and there was a point where this show was really fantastic and really good at being intriguing.

I hope in a few years they do a remake and do seasons 3 & 4 justice 🙏

[sapphire-weapon]

i just finished Infinite Darkness and have a lot of Thoughts™️. please indulge me if you'd like.

spoiler + long post warning

i went into it with pretty low expectations because everyone kept on calling it a shitshow. it's not bad per se, but it wasn't good either. it was.. meh. 2.5/5.

afaik ID takes place in 2006, and RE4 in '04. so why tf does Leon look like he's at least 40??

that honestly fucked it up timeline-wise for me. was the show purposely designed not to fit into the timeline in any way whatsoever a la "welcome to raccoon city"?

if that's the case, Leon and Claire still somehow are able to remember the events of Raccoon City in this timeline.

my brain can't come to a logical conclusion over the timeline, so i'll leave it at that.

i wish they gave Claire more screen time. they did her so dirty imo.

what were they trying to set up with Claire and Leon's interactions? a loveteam? if this was so, what even was their last conversation in ep 4?

the Claire on top of Leon scene. tf? what the hell were they trying to set up? were they going to fuck and continue the redfield bloodline right then and there? kiss? hug? maybe punch each other's lights out?? i'm seriously so fucking confused.

Shen Mei and Leon too. Leon asks her out and she declines. what was the point of that conversation? i'm just going to assume it's to show the locket with Jun See's picture in it.

(were they trying to show how bitchless Leon is at least in this series?)

why the hell did Jason kill Shen Mei? what was the point? why didn't Leon give a shit when she died? it was like he just forgot about her.

i love how President Graham believes anything as long as Leon is involved. in ep 1 when Leon's late: "it's fine bc you saved my daughter." in the last ep when Patrick tells him that Wilson was behind everything and cites Leon as source, Mr. POTUS decides to wing his speech ON THE SPOT just because of that fact. what if Patrick was making it up? that really would have fucked up international relations and all that. i don't know. Graham really loves Leon i guess.

going off of that, i wish we got to see more of Patrick. i would have loved to see him interact more with Leon.

what is gonna happen to that chip!?

i have no idea if a Season 2 would be able to salvage/explain the plot, but honestly i don't think the series deserves a Season 2. it might be a waste of time and money plus an even bigger disappointment to fans.

alright, onto performances.

Nick Apostolides to me sounds like someone who's breaking in a new pair of shoes. it sounds like he's still getting used to walking in them and therefore tries different things (which i find ironic since he'd already voiced baby faced rookie cop Leon S. Kennedy atp, but also understandable as Leon sounded young in that game). he's all over the place imo. he sounded like RE2R Leon, RE4R Leon, and someone else entirely throughout the four episodes. but as you said in another ask, he really made up for it in RE4R. solid voice acting all around imo.

Ray Chase. before i saw him here i knew him as Neuvillette (aka "according to the judgment of the Oratrice Mecanique d'Analyse Cardinale") in Genshin Impact. his line delivery is stellar. i hope that's also him voicing mutated/infected Jason because he sounds fantastic there. but there's a line that he says there that sounds so awkward because the delivery is so sped up that the emotion is gone.

Stephanie Panisello also voices Claire in RE2R, but i haven't seen too much of her there to compare it to her performance here. i will say, however, that i honestly enjoyed her performance here, but there are times when she sounds like she's holding back a bit. it would have been perfect if she let go a little bit more.

Jona Xiao as Shen Mei was also great, but i think she also suffers the sams problem as Stephanje in that she sounds like she'a holding back.

Doug Stone as Wilson was perhaps the most enjoyable for me, as well as Billy Kametz who voiced Patrick.

this (https://youtu.be/HN2OkCu6FbE?si=jl7K8tILCYoheGCX) was pretty badass tho

https://youtu.be/7lnFgfhVW-E?si=RZ-EF-WN2vVDY8PS holy shit.

the unfortunate thing is

most of my responses to your reactions boil down to "welcome to the RE CGI-verse." like:

why tf does Leon look like he's at least 40??

i wish they gave Claire more screen time

why the hell did Jason kill Shen Mei? what was the point? why didn't Leon give a shit when she died?

all fall under that category LMAO

now, in terms of things i can respond to:

was the show purposely designed not to fit into the timeline in any way whatsoever a la "welcome to raccoon city"?

no. just because leon's character model looks bad doesn't mean that the story exists out of universe. it takes place in 06 and is part of the regular OG canon timeline. period.

what were they trying to set up with Claire and Leon's interactions?

nothing.

the CGI-verse is the reason why a few true cleon diehards still hold onto hope that cleon will still somehow be endgame, but the fact of the matter is that leon and claire just have That Kind of Friendship. it goes nowhere; it's just how they are.

Shen Mei and Leon too. Leon asks her out and she declines. what was the point of that conversation? i'm just going to assume it's to show the locket with Jun See's picture in it. (were they trying to show how bitchless Leon is at least in this series?)

both explanations are correct. ID adds a new dimension to the running "OG Leon is a Fucking Slut Who Can't Actually Score" gag by making him an actual homewrecker this time around. but ultimately yes it was to show the locket.

what is gonna happen to that chip!?

nothing and you know it lmao

this (https://youtu.be/HN2OkCu6FbE?si=jl7K8tILCYoheGCX) was pretty badass tho

this is the best moment that OG leon has in the entire series and i'm not joking. it's not the best in the sense of "this is when he, as a person, is at his best." it's the best in the sense of "this is the only moment in the entire series where we get to see leon do his Actual Job and know what he Actually Does outside of outbreak incidents, and it serves to add more context and perspective to so many other facets of his character." i could write an entire fucking essay about this scene/moment. god.

goD

[actualbird]

hi zak!

the main story cn pv reminded me of a question I had! sorry if it's boring / has been discussed on here before, but how do you think the timeline of the game works? do you read the main story as an au different from the universe in which Rosa is with one of the guys (which means there'd be at least 4 "universes", one per guy but with the main story as part of that development), or do you see it as entirely seperate?

I personally tend to like the idea that the main story is a precursor to the relationships / happens within the first year before they start dating. I think it (as of what we have on global rn) has to come before that first anni mark, bc the boys are still stuck in some of the issues they had before they began to develop. also, some of the important developments from the main story must exist, such as meeting vyn in his home or defending Marius in ep 2 for their respective stories to even exist, which implies some sort of layover between the two. some characters, such as Harry grant, also appear in events tailored toward the others (if I recall, harry appears in the event for vyns first birthday), which implies the story has continued beyond the point "required" (only up to ep 2 is 100% necessary to begin vyns route) for each ml. in my opinion, this implies that the main story has unfolding effects on the story, but it feels like we see less of the latest chapters have impact into the specific solo ml events or stories.

the events do sow a little more chaos imo. the really big events imply a realistic passage of time; 3rd anni event seemed implied to have also come in the 3rd year since Rosa joined nxx. but this also feels like a wrinkle because it stands in the way of the idea of it existing in the same timeline as Rosas relationship with whatever man. if they were doing the blizzard red thread event as an nxx team, it implies the nxx duty has not been completed, right? but at that time in the mls story line, they were dating right?

I find it hard to believe Rosa is in a relationship w whichever guy at the time of the main story just due to their lacking growth. as a vyn stan, it's most apparent in him to me. in the main story he struggles w trust and still seems very standoffish, but these are things he has begun working on and continues working on as his feelings, and eventually relationship, develop. I'm not as bothered by some differences, like how Luke's illness is revealed in the main story vs how it was revealed to Rosa in his story, bc I can reason that to myself as making up for the fact that not everyone plays everyone's stories or in whatever universe, such as one where Rosa is with Artem, she would not find out as she did in Luke's story, but if she were with luke, maybe his main story would "take presidence" in the sense of what's canon? I guess in the sense of a weird if; then sort of thing?

idk if this made sense and I'm so sorry it's so dreadfully long and ranty. I have a lot of thoughts about how the storylines could connect but also struggle to line up, and I was curious as to what anyone else had to think or say about it, especially if there's any details I'm for getting. but also as this is so long pls don't feel the need to answer it, or even to answer it with something like super detailed. I just wanted to put my thoughts out there and ask what you personally tend to lean toward in ur own thinking :]

ohhhh this is a really interesting view you have!!

my personal view is kjsbflkdl completely different tho. i personally see the main story route and all the romance routes as like Completely Different Timelines/AUs, where main stories 1-5 happen before the romance route but then after that, diverge completely

i remember....i made a chart about this....once.....but i didnt save the image and i cant find it on my blog anymore kjBKSJFDF

but yeah i view them as different timelines. mostly because it's a headache to marry all the timelines into one, but also because luke (my brain's constant focus) is so different in his romance route and main story route. i view those two lukes as separate versions of luke, and thus these stories as stories that happen independent of each other

your view is really cool tho and i enjoyed reading this ask :D

[themyscirah]

Jess? Or Hal? For the ask game (And if you've done both of them, just pick your favorite super)

I haven't done either yet! I'll do Hal in this post and maybe Jess in another after this

Tw for canonical past suicide for later in the post (skip the story idea section)

First impression:

My real first encounter with him was probably as a guest appearance within Green Lanterns, but the first book I read with him was GL/GA. I don't remember too much of what I thought of him there, it was probably more of a general "oh he seems cool I guess" kind of neutral/positive attitude. By the time I read a Hal comic I'd already met Simon, Jess, and Jo so he wasn't a contender for the spot of my favorite lantern. I never fully finished GL/GA though bc I had the book on loan

Impression now:

Mixed. There are some Hal moments I genuinely do love and like, but tbh he can get on my nerves very easily. Of the Earth lanterns he's either my least or next to least favorite (which doesn't mean I don't like him!) but he's also like the "main character" of GL so I get annoyed when I feel like other GLs are being ignored in favor of Hal.

Favorite moment:

With that said there are sooooooo many Hal moments I just love. He's very much a character made by specific moments for me (rather than a general appreciation of who he is overall). Some Swishy fave contenders include his "Avenge me" internal monologue when he fights Mongul in GL (1990) #46, and OFC the Emerald Twilight arc a few issues later. Also in the very first issue of that book, where he jumps off a cliff in front of some campers (waiting until the last moment before using his ring) was an important moment for me in reading Hal, because it was the first time I went "oh! This guy is crazy!"

Idea for a story:

An exploration of the fact that Hal literally killed himself on panel in GL (2011) #19. Because like what the hell, why did this happen and then NO ONE EVER TALKED ABOUT IT. (This is insane to me). I think I'd probably revisit it in a dream sequence, maaaybe doing a rewrite/reimagining of his Knight Terrors issue (which I have NOT read lol) to kind of address that and talk about his mental state and things that had an impact on that, stuff like his parents, the Guardians, PARALLAX. Basically it'd be Hal and the ghost of Tomar-Re just talking about how he is not okay. A pretty heavy response to a pretty heavy topic.

Unpopular opinion:

I'm going to be so real here like 95% of my Hal opinions are unpopular bc its just me talking about how I think he's overrated. Like we're bros ig but still. Overrated.

Like I LIKE him but I'm annoyed at him like 80% of the time bc DC is always putting out a mid story focusing on him while ignoring my faves WHO ARE SO COOL AND DESERVE STORIES 😤💔😭

I guess one beyond that is I'm not a fan of his friendship with Barry. Maybe this is just because I haven't read anything where they're like... interesting? But I just don't get the hype. ESPECIALLY compared to his relationship with Oliver which is absolutely insane in comparison. Like why are we talking abt Barry rn when OLLIE LITERALLY SHOT HAL AND HAL RESSURECTED OLLIE. like guys. Guys. Are you seeing this shit.

Favorite relationship:

Like ship wise? I'm not a huge Halcarol fan personally but I do think they're kind of the epitome of "you're perfect for each other. Never involve anyone else in what you have going on," kind of messy drama-filled relationship with a lot of history.

I also really like halollie and their relationship but not in like a "they should date" way or anything like that. Like they're bros to me who emotionally have a whole complicated little thing going on like idk

Within the lanterns I think the frenemy whatever thing Guy and Hal do is SO funny. I love especially the beginning of GL (1990) where Guy just in his free time shows up to ruin Hal's life while Hal is just so sick and done and mad about it. Peak comedy, Guy never change

Fave headcanon:

Do I have any headcanons about Hal? Not really. I try to think about him as little as possible (kidding). No um I'd say I don't really have any, and if I did they'd probably be really basic or smth like that he cries watching both Top Gun movies.

[cornflowershade]

bad buddy fandom getting-to-know-you meme!

Thank you for tagging me @lamonnaie!

note: i consider "fanworks" to pretty much everything people create related to a fandom, including but not limited to meta/analysis/discussion, gifs, fanvids/edits/fancams, filk, fanart, fanfic, fan food, fan crafts, etc. please include this note with the meme unless you have a different definition!

name and whatever you want to share about yourself Sonia (she/her). 24. I love getting to know people & chatting about shows so lets goooo

when did you watch bad buddy/join the fandom? I watched Bad Buddy in one week, in late October 2022. I owe it to @airenyah honestly. I think I found their blog through an SPN post and clicked over for that reason. In my scrolling, I happened upon a lovely gifset (wish I could recall who made it) of InkPa. It was the scene where they're outside and Pa says anyone taller than her is fine and hops down off the sidewalk. :) Love that scene. Anyway I reblogged it and in the tags was like WHAT IS THIS I MUST WATCH IT. To which airenyah gave me a whole blessed reply telling me the show name, giving a small synopsis/what to expect from my first thai drama & telling me where I could watch it. I immediately watched the series and adored it. I've seen it twice thus far.

favorite ship(s) PatPran & InkPa :)

favorite character(s): Okay I adore all the main 4 but I'm gonna go with Pran. I love him. There's just something so soft about him and how on earth do his eyes communicate so much?? I think I relate to his messy little overthinking and silently in love brain—very "me the first time i had a queer crush and simply wallowed the whole time bc it was impossible" lol. Also, he's always making the funniest facial expressions which gets me every time. I could go on about everything I like about his character (for instance how clever yet sometimes oblivious he is & how he gets all annoyed lol). Though I do question his sense of interior design and that smiley face obsession.

favorite episode(s) Honestly I'm not certain if I have one?? It's all so good! I do really like their "whoever falls first loses" era though. Wait actually?? My favorite ep might be the early one where Pat thinks he's hitting on the "girl" across the hall and they end up running into each other on the roof. Also both of the beach episodes.

favorite scene(s) *pastes in the entire show* Okay okay I'll try to pick a few:

~ The scene where Pat is staying over and he and Pran are lying in the dark, counting down to say in unison whether they have a crush on Ink. Idk I remember that scene having an emotional impact on me. Pran's face??? Then when Pat asks "would you like me?" and Pran says "I hate you" and then he yanks the blanket away but you saw him crying?? ahhhghrhghgh

~ The scene in the darkroom with Ink and Pa. I remember getting so emotional. Pretty sure Pa's dialogue and acting made me cry. "I do [like you being nice to me]. I like it so much that I thought I was special to you." ARE YOU KIDDING ME ASDFGZ. And then Ink says she is special to her!! And it's so sweet!!

~ OH and how could I forget. This should be at the top of the list. I realllly like the scene where Pran stands up to his mom and they have that emotional fight in their front hall. That whole thing is just. AHHHHHH. AHHH. AHIOFJEIOsdJIO. SIJDGRIOGJRIGJORE

~ And the scene at the stairs where Pat yells how much he loves Pran in front of Pran's whole faculty. :)

(Also any scene where Pat & Pran are being silly. Like their dumb little chopstick fight :p omg or the designing the bus stop at night scene)

one thing you would change about the show if you could Ohhhh I don't know! Maybe I'd throw in a few more InkPa scenes :)

what are your some of your favorite fanworks made by other people? Ahh fun fun fun. Get ready for some fanvid recs! (What else do you expect from me, a fanvidder.)

• Just My Type (Pat x Pran) by samyvids • Physical (Pat x Pran) by coldties • Enchanted (Ink x Pa) by rheaprodz • I really like you (Pat x Pran) by dkyth73 • Rebels (Pat x Pran) by coldties • Dandelions (Pat x Pran) by hylian fanvids

(if you create fanworks) what are your favorite fanworks that you’ve made? I've made two fanvids for Bad Buddy, as well as one song cover haha. I'll stick to the fanvids here. :)

• All I Need (Ink x Pa) • That dimple is illegal (Pat x Pran)

a song that makes you think of bbs (the ones in the show don’t count lol) Physical by Dua Lipa. The fanvid using that song is my all-time favorite BBS edit, so hearing the song reminds me of it.

idk anything else you want us to know? Uhhhhhhhh. I mean I could ramble about BBS and why it means so much to me for a long time haha. Should I do that? I guess I'll do that.

Okay so BBS was the first Thai drama I watched. I was still feeling a lot from the SPN-finale/confession scene era (yes that happened 2 years prior but it's SPN okay iykyk) which had me especially sad about and aware of media censorship etc. etc.

On top of that I was still working up the courage to leave this group chat of childhood friends, some of whom liked to complain about media "making everything gay" etc. (Amazing how you can not know people are homophobic for the entirety of your childhood bc the topic just never comes up lol.) Which was of course upsetting to me for multiple reasons. However the universe decided to do something nice and Heartstopper was released. That series felt really huge to me, but after it was over, I was left with this feeling of like... what else is there to watch? Where else will I ever find a queer ship this canon where they're also the main characters?

That's when I came across BBS and it gave me this realization that OH WAIT we aren't limited to western media and OH LOOK there's so many great shows that I didn't even know about!! And they keep making them! Also it was a queer story where the main obstacle wasn't being gay (Plus, Asian leads!!). And BBS itself is just such a standout show. First of all, I love a good comedy and the series made me laugh so much. It's heartfelt but full of ANTICS [like yes lets have fun! Lets not take everything too seriously!], and Pat & Pran & Ink & Pa are just such wonderful and lovable and real feeling characters—who have this lovely friendship too—and the show is just! Such a fun ride. <3 I recall watching the series and feeling like my world just got a little bit bigger. Anyway Bad Buddy goes all in for everything it does and it's such a joy.

.

Tagging @airenyah and @distant-screaming and @feralmuskyscentedhoepran if you haven't done this yet and would like to!