#i think they should become friends. listen

[reignpage]

Physics Tutor!Nanami

Conservation of momentum: if it's just us we can remain at a constant

Content: Friday night party, we're nearing the end y'all, mixed content of angst and fluff, a little sexual action but only if you squint Word Count: 3k Guide

“Nanami, seriously, you’re a grown man,” you mutter, a little annoyed. 

This isn’t how you expected to spend to your Friday night, wrangling a six-foot-tall man into his home but your ex-physics tutor came to a frat party and you had actually drank with him. Now you’re facing the consequences. 

Earlier in the night, the sight of Nanami in his cute blue sweater, sitting awkwardly as he eyed the couple making out next to him with disgust, was enough to warrant a heart attack. You had offered to drink with him in the garden, to take care of him so he could let loose. For an hour or two, you drank a couple shots, relishing the cool breeze which kept your head screwed tight as you sat beside him.

Gojo had passed by, wriggling his eyebrows at you and making lewd movements with his hands. That hadn’t gone by unnoticed by Nanami, who grew quiet. You thought maybe he was tired, maybe he wanted to go home, and when you suggested you part ways, he gripped your wrist. 

“No, don’t go with him,” he slurred. 

You didn’t have plans to go with your friend, you were just going to turn in for the night too, but as you looked at the man you’ve been madly in love with for months and saw his ruffled hair, slightly askew glasses, fogging up from the heat his face was producing, and the flush brightening his cheeks, you realised that there was nowhere else you’d rather be. 

So, you stayed, sitting on the garden sofa with him. There were a couple other people loitering around, but none really paid any attention, everyone too immersed in their own conversations and lives to notice the two of you in the corner, thighs pressed together and shoulder brushing once in a while. 

His heat was permeating, tickling your side, and you couldn't help yourself, you leaned in close, the alcohol in your system made it so effortless to just let his gravitation pull bring you closer. If he noticed, he didn't say a thing.

You made small talk, discussing lectures and assignments. It was easy to talk to Nanami; other people were always so eager to prove themselves academically superior, never really listening to what you had to say, but rather looking for weak points to attack. It was never a conversation and instead a battlefield. And when you complained to your friends, they never seemed to understand.

With him, however, he listened more than he talked. Always. He hummed and nodded, mulling and considering your words carefully like what you had to say was just as important as anything an esteemed lecturer was teaching. With him, you felt like equals. Which was insane because he was Nanami Kento, and you were just the girl he had to tutor.

"I hate that bald Professor!" You groaned. "He's so boring."

He chuckled, adjusting his glasses. "He is rather monotonous, I must admit. You aren't the first student to complain and likely will not be the last."

"Yeah, I bet. But I honestly just don't think he should be a lecturer. I'd probably be a better one than him."

Meeting your gaze, you see the crinkle in the corners of his eyes, the way they soften as they roam your face, stopping by your smile. His fingers twitch on the empty shot glass, skimming the rim just a little before he affirms, "I have no doubts you would be; I can't imagine anyone finding you boring."

Passing each other shot glasses, you'd sip and chat. Nothing about the elephant in the room, not about your confessions, about the odd tension permeating the relationship, certainly not about why he showed up to the party, or why he had become flirtatious. Perhaps it was cowardice that held you both back. Maybe it was the enjoyment of simply existing beside each other, not as classmates, not as tutor and student, and not as two people whose feelings have gotten all tied up.

But as just Nanami and y/n.

Eventually, you both ceased your chattering. Settling to watch the other partygoers or the stars twinkling. Once in a while, he'd point to a star and tell you about its story, and you'd sit entranced by his voice --it's so steady, so smooth and clear, you could listen to it for hours. And when he talked to you of astronomy and gravity and quantum mechanics and the probability of time travel, you thought he should be a lecturer. You'd attend every class, every seminar, and never complain.

"How do you know so much about stars? We don't get taught about constellations."

He lifted one shoulder. "I work at the Eden Observatory part-time."

It was so quintessentially Nanami you didn't question it even though you were bursting to ask. He would have given you all the answers you sought, you're sure by the way he gazes at you expectantly.

Silence passed by, comfortable and soothing. You had no idea what time it was, didn’t care enough to reach forward to get your phone from the table, and neither did Nanami. You thought maybe he was nodding off but when you peered up at him, he was looking down. 

At your hand. 

“C-can I hold it?” 

His voice was gravelly, a hesitation that you’d never heard from him. The way he was gazing down at your hand, limp on your lap, like it was precious, like it was made of glass, and he could be beheaded for daring to even look, made your stomach feel weird. It was the very feeling you had been trying to bury for weeks. 

It was dangerous. You’d been working so hard to walk away and he was erasing the line, stretching out his arms to invite you back over. Unwise was what letting him do as he pleased would be, and yet, you found yourself nodding. And when his own hands, warm and large, wrapped around one of yours, you couldn’t fight back the shiver that ran through you. 

He was holding you so softly, in a way no one ever has, and you could only gulp. It was as if you had entered enemy territory, foreign and riddled with land mines that could go off and blow everything up if you so as much as made the wrong step. When his thumb grazed your knuckles, your heart skipped a beat. 

“Nanami,” you began but his hand squeezed yours and you shut up.

Your ex-physics tutor was still staring at your hand, marvelling at the soft skin, his glasses slide down his nose just a little bit, and you had to push it up with your free hand. That caught his attention, as if remembering there was a person attached to the hand he was holding so carefully. 

Clearing his throat, he shook his head, clearly trying to get his bearings. “Y/n, please rethink your decision to drop out.”

“I can’t.” You pulled your hand out of his like it burned. And then you looked away, crossing your arms so you wouldn’t be tempted. “This is for the best.”

“No. You were doing so well, even Professor Yaga had said so.”

With a sigh, you turned back to him, finding his blush endearing. The longer you stared the more it threatened your defences. You couldn’t let him talk you out of it, your sister you could fight off, even Gojo, but not Nanami. Not when every word that came out of his mouth sounded like the Gospel, like undeniable, irrefutable facts. 

Standing, you brushed invisible dust off your skirt and looked anywhere but at him. Unsteady, you asserted, “Nanami, I’ll take you back.”

He shook his head, strands of his hair falling over his forehead, obscuring his vision. You brushed them off, so lush under your palm, and he looked up at you like you were an angel -- mouth slightly parted, he blew air in the space between you, eyes slightly glossy as he watched you. 

“You’re so beautiful, you know?” He whispered, and then added, his brows furrowing, softening his gaze even further, “It hurts to look at you.”

You staggered back, arms falling to your sides as you gaped at him. You didn’t understand what that meant, what he was trying to say, nor why your heart was clenching so painfully, like someone had reached in and squeezed. 

“Maybe you can get your roommate to take you,” you whispered breathlessly.

Nanami shook his head once more, standing up too. His trousers were all crinkled and when he got to his feet he swayed slightly. You rushed over to his side, letting him lean against you. He was heavy, even as he carried most of his weight, and he smelled amazing. Clean, fresh and sweet. It reminded you of a bakery, just after closing, with the scent of butter and vanilla lingering in the air. 

“No, Haibara’s with his sister.” 

You both began walking, ignoring the staring and whistling people were throwing at you as they noticed both of your existence then. Some girls pointed to Nanami, no doubt recognising him from the List. They whispered amongst themselves, blushing and roving his body. You urged him to walk faster.

“Hey, hey, where are you two lovebirds going?” An irritating voice shouted. “You know my rules about fucking in the house. You have to pay a fee.”

Rolling your eyes, you informed him, “I’m taking Nanami home, he’s a little out of it.”

Gojo scanned your ex-tutor’s face, really looking at him and realising you were right. Suddenly, his grin dropped, and he was nodding to the front door. “Alright, I’ll drive. You seem out of it too.”

And just before you all left through the front door, he yelled to his deputy, “Don’t let the place burn down, it's a pain to deal with.”

The car ride to Nanami’s place passed in another relative silence, both of you in the back as you strapped him in, and your friend hummed to the songs on the radio, drumming his fingers. As obnoxious as Gojo could be, there were these rare moments of maturity and wisdom that people didn't see. But you did. You and Suguru, and these were the very moments that reminded you, no matter what, you would always find a home with him.

Parked, you unbuckled your seatbelt, reaching over the slightly light-headed man and unbuckled him too. His hand brushed your hair, gently, always so gentle. You refused to look at him.

“Let me know if you need a ride back,” Gojo threw at you, going on his phone as you fought to get your ex-tutor out, ignoring the glares you were directing towards him. His helpfulness had reached its max, clearly.

“No, she’s staying with me,” Nanami croaked. He slammed the door a little harder than necessary and you winced. Pointing a finger at Gojo through the rolled down window, he slurred, “You can go.”

Not taking any offence whatsoever, the frat president grinned and winked at you. “Alright, have fun, babes. Wrap it before you tap it. Or not. I'm pretty ready to be a fun uncle.”

And then he was driving off, leaving you crumpling under the weight of your responsibility with your jaw on the floor. That prick. Oh, you were so going to make him pay. 

By some miracle, you made it up to his floor with Nanami's jumbled directions, and now here you are, muttering irritated complaints about how clumsy this grown man is despite his age and wisdom.

“Seriously? Nanami, I told you to get it before we reach your door!”

You’re watching Nanami dig through his pockets for his keys, pink tinting the tip of his ears, either with embarrassment or with the warmth of the alcohol. He’s fumbling, muttering curses under his breath as he struggles, clumsy fingers catching on each other. You groan and swat his hands away, trying to get a feel for his keys through his trousers instead. 

This is not your first time dealing with drunk men. But it is your first time with a man as adorable as he is, unfortunately.

“Are you mad at me?”

Glancing up, you look at him, exasperated and unprepared for the pout on his face. His glasses are slanted again, and you have no free hands to push them back up — one hand is already holding him up and the other is buried in his pocket searching for his keys and trying to get past the lip balm in there. 

"No, Nanami. I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed." You hate that you sound just like your mother, but someone has to be the responsible one. You just never thought it'd ever be you.

He winces. “Please, be careful.”

“Sorry, did I hurt you?”

Nanami flushes harder, the tips of his ears matching and he avoids eye contact, stilling your wrist with a firm hand. “No, you didn’t. It’s just…”

You follow his gaze, both of you looking down and seeing something that shouldn’t be happening. You blink, cartoon character style. This is so very bad. 

Taking a deep breath, you pull the keys out and mutter weakly, “Found it.”

Once you’re inside, you pull Nanami with you, eyeing his place and appreciating the cleanliness; your place is not nearly as tidy as his. But you do see a messy arrangement of papers on his table. You can imagine a busy Nanami, sitting on the sofa, going over the papers and reading out loud under his breath. You smile.

“Alright, big guy. Where’s your room?”

“Buy me dinner first,” he chuckles to himself. He slumps down on the sofa, the leather creaking under his weight and he shrugs off his sweater, the shirt underneath riding up to reveal his abs. You look away. 

Oh, so the man has jokes. 

You’re fighting the urge to walk away and with a shaky breath, full of frustration, you very calmly say, “Nanami, it’s late, sweetheart. You’re going to need to go to bed, okay?”

Then he’s smiling up at you, a gummy smile that’s so dopey you can’t help but smile with him. 

“I like that.” He tilts his head at you. “I like when you call me sweetheart. Do it again.”

Counting to ten, you try again, “Okay, Nanami. I’ll call you sweetheart when you get in bed. It’s a reward.”

He mouths it back, tasting the word and that seems to resonate with him. Raising a hand out, he’s urging you to help him up and so you step forward, ready to bear his weight again, but then you’re being yanked down, and the world turns upside down. 

Nanami’s pinned you to the sofa, leaning over you with a fierce look in his eyes. Gone is the nerdy lightweight, and in his place is the man you’ve caught glimpses of. The one that furrows his brown in a stern scolding, that scribbles frantically on his papers and argues with the professors. Suddenly, he no longer looks his age and instead, appears not as a clumsy college student, but rather as a man. 

The kind of man that could command the attention of an entire room. 

“You did this to me,” he gestures to his hard on, the very same one you’ve been avoiding staring too long at. “Take responsibility, won’t you, darling?”

You choke on your own saliva. What the fuck?

Shaking your head, you remind yourself, he’s drunk, you’re no longer his student, and you’ve been a pain in his ass the entire time. Don’t take anything he says whilst under the influence to heart. It’s just chemicals in his brain. Just a biological urge. It means nothing. 

“Nanami, you’re drunk, let’s drink some water, okay?”

“Four shots is barely anything. I might be a lightweight, but I’m tipsy at most,” he scoffs. Leaning down, he grazes your cheek with his nose, inhaling deep with a groan. “You always smell so good.”

He might claim to be sober enough, but you’re not convinced. Sure, you can’t deny that you want him, but you don’t want him like this; you don’t want to be wanted because the alcohol has clouded his judgment. You want to be seen, as you are and not just another warm body to pass the time. 

Slowly, gently and with as much patience as you can muster, you nudge his head from your neck, and say, “You need to let me go, Nanami.”

“No.”

“Nanami.”

“I don’t want you to leave me.” That gravelly voice is back, the one weighed down by some inner turmoil you aren’t privy to, and you can only bite your lip when he presses a tender kiss at the crook of your neck. “I want you any way you’ll let me.”

You’re tearing up. It might be because he’s whispering it right by your ear or because his words sound so sincere, but you feel your bottom lip quiver. This isn’t how the night was supposed to go; you wanted to let loose and forget everything by partying life away, but now you’re practically cuddling with your physics tutor. Ex physics tutor.

Despite being a little out of it and shaking with some unknown emotion, he isn’t suffocating you with his weight. He’s holding himself up in a plank, inhaling your scent and fighting off your weak pushes. 

“Please, Nanami. Let’s talk about this tomorrow, okay?”

“You promise?” He lifts his head, lashes fluttering as he searches your features for any hint of deception. “You’re not going to avoid me?”

You shake your head, and he sighs, smiling. 

“Good, because I really don’t like it when you do that.”

And then he’s pushing off. A cool breeze brushes past you and you’re shivering from the sudden loss of warmth. Nanami disappears into a room you’re assuming is his and you go to the kitchen to get a glass of water. When you enter his room, he’s only in his boxers, climbing into bed. 

He lifts the cover up and pats the empty space beside him, grumbling, “Come on, I’m cold.”

You sigh, ripping the cover from his hands and tuck him in. “No, Nanami. I’m not sleeping with you. I’m going now so I'll see you tomorrow, okay?”

Almost breaking out into laughter at the scowl that graces his face, you have to distract yourself by pulling his glasses off and folding them onto his bedside table. Like this, he looks so youthful. No longer frowning over data variables or anomalistic lab results, he’s just lying peacefully. 

"You aren't better off taking a different course. You work well under my tutelage. Grant me the opportunity to change your mind about everything. Let me show you I didn't mean the things I said," he pleads, eyes flutterings shut.

Hesitant, you say, "I'm not sure that's such a good idea, Nanami."

"Just one chance, y/n. Don't cross this off simply because we reached a bump. You trusted my guidance before, trust me now."

You don't know what exactly he's referring to and you're too scared to ask. All you can do is watch sincerity, a raw kind of pleading, swirl in his vibrant eyes. He has you in his palms and he doesn't even realise.

"Okay."

He’s fast asleep when you leave. 

You don’t bother Gojo for a ride back to your home, you texted him your sister's picking you up. She might be asleep by now but you'll wake her up anyways, so you can tell her about everything that's happened and ask for her two cents, because you think Nanami practically confessed his feelings for you. But that doesn’t make sense with all that’s unfolded, right?

How could he possibly like a girl like you?

You’re loud, boisterous, air-headed, and not the kind of girl one takes home to their mother. He deserves a girl that’s as smart, as put together, and mature and wise as he is. Deserves one that hasn’t been tainted by bad decision and nightmares.

Sighing again — you’ve been doing a lot of that lately — you walk home, in the dark, fighting the urge to look back. And as the night’s chill prick your skin, you wonder how Nanami will feel in the morning. 

Embarrassment, shame, humiliation?

Whatever it’ll be, you just hope it isn’t regret. 

You have enough of that for the both of you.

[lightofraye]

I’m about to do something I thought I wouldn’t do….

Fake hair. You can see the extensions. You should never be able to see them. This means they’re cheap, a bad job. Given one photo she shared once a few years ago, most of her hair is fake probably because she fried it to death with bad dye jobs. She has all that money and still can’t do her hair right, yikes.

Fake boobs. She tried to claim she had breast implants because of tumors, that after the tumors were taken out, her breasts were pretty flat. Okay. Except we can guess about implants twice and she never, ever speaks up about the importance of care, of encouraging those with breasts to do monthly exams, talk openly about supporting healthcare, and so on. Want to be an activist? Use your personal story to help people connect. She never does, and I find it suspicious.

Fake nose. She’s had at least two or three nose jobs since then and those too weren’t done that well.

Fake teeth. Her veneers are often a bad match and at times we’ve seen her struggle to speak or close her mouth. Again, a bad job. How does she keep getting badly done stuff?

Probably fake tan. I’ll give that a pass because tanning is usually unsafe and tanning beds can be dangerous. Heck, there’s now issues with spray tans being risky due to inhaling the chemicals.

Fake voice. Listening to her earlier years and now, we can tell the difference in deliberately higher pitch, and it doesn’t work. It doesn’t make her seem young. It’s scratchy, pitchy, and just not attractive. She should get a vocal coach to help speak in a better pitch.

No class. All the money in the world won’t buy it.

No confidence. She thinks clothes and hair make the confidence and it’s not. She’s so insecure, it’s obvious.

Money cannot buy her way into anything though she’s tried and tried. Connecticut is old money and will (and probably is) mock her attempts to become a part of them.

Fake activist. Fake ally. Fake friend. Fake wife.

All she ever had in terms of claim to fame is her body. I mean, to claim by herself.

Everything else was from Jensen.

[garez19]

isekai’d! yandere x reader

I think we’ve talked about isekai’d reader already… but what do you think about a yandere who just got isekaid into a silly little world?

notes: mention of an injury (not descibed), no pronouns used for the reader, no use of y/n

when he finds himself in a completely different place, he mutters a curse word as he tries to get up.

huh?

huh?

and when he finally realizes this is the bedroom he has seen in that one webtoon, he runs to the bathroom. he takes a look in the mirror and he curses under his breath again as he sees the image of the main character. he touches his blond hair, and he looks himself with pure confusion.

“I can’t believe I just turned blonde,” he sighs. “man, fuck my life.”

but good thing he is the main character, right? well, there was no other character who were as charismatic as him apart from the protagonist, right? moreover, he quite likes the main character too, and relates to him on a deeper as the story processes. they have similar personalities and a similar way of approaching the situations. he rarely enjoys webtoons but well, good thing he found a cool one, no? however, when he figures out there are more to be upset over being blonde, he curses again. because hell, this was not a romance story.

this was a fantasy. a very descriptive and terrifying one too.

yet, he is at an advantage, he repeats, because he has read it multiple times, and very much knows about the ending.

he knows what to do, he knows who he should team up with, he knows who to stay away from, and he most certainly knows how he needs to handle anything that’ll ever happen.

he does handle it well. and he knows the ending will be priceless. he is sure it’s going to be alright. and he knows you too, the side-character with little to no role, but quite loved by the readers, he recalls. you help him out once or twice, and have your iconic moments too.

well, a shame you were going to die, huh? because you truly feel real, you make him feel like he’s not completely alone in this world. he finds you creepy in the sense that he is reminded the real world by you. he finds you relatable. and he finds your creepiness comforting in its own way, coming from the familiarity.

so he keeps you close. he doesn’t want to be all alone in a completely different world. he doesn’t want to face all this all by himself with all these puppets around them.

he asks you to join his adventures. and you accept it. you two become as close as you can, and he knows the chapter that you die in is soon to come.

and he most certainly isn’t ready.

so when you come along with him to do your duty respectfully, knowing you were going to pass away right there, he calls out your name.

“you’re not coming.” he says. you look up at him with an obvious confusion.

“why not?” you ask.

“because you aren’t needed. you just stay here.” he adds. and you frown, still confused. you definitely are needed there. everyone is needed there. and you are going to go. another thing that made you liked by the audience, brave and willing to take action.

“well, you aren’t coming, end of discussion. I can just lock you up if you want to keep talking.” he says. and although you think he just wanted to half-joke and assert some kind of dominance, he is definitely serious about it.

and you don’t need to know.

or you do. because fuck, you leave him little to no thing to do when you don’t listen and follow him around. there’s a different expression on his face, one that you hadn’t seen until now. it’s almost like he’s panicked, and you can’t understand why he panics when he sees you—considering there are way more scary things around the area.

he calls out to his best friend, and the horrifying creature they fight with seems wrathful. he needs to get you out of here. he needs to do it quickly.

“cairos will escort you, and we will talk about it once i come back, okay?” you’ve never seen him so upset, and you’re not sure why he acts so crazy about the whole situation. you look at cairos, and he seem shocked too, yet he accepts quickly and takes the lead. you’re sure if you’re supposed to do anything but obey now. and you follow him to the place.

“you’re fucked up, I must say,” cairos jokes.

“what did I even do anyway?” you huff. and to be fair, he doesn’t understand either, but there’s no way he’d get so mad if there wasn’t a reason, right?

“well, uh, beats me, but you shouldn’t do that again, you know.” he adds. and the rest of the path is quiet, with this uneasiness around you.

this was your last duty. one last one and you were going to be done and go back to your own life. at least according to what the wizard has told you anyway. and he has just messed it all up.

fuck

so what are you supposed to do know? wait for the beasts to hunt you down so you can go back? cairos tells you he needs to go back when you arrive, and that both he and you will be in big trouble if you decide to do that again.

so you wait quietly, and think of a new solution as you do so.

***

“luka’s injured, fuck,” cairos curses. and as you take him to his bed and bandage him up, you can’t help but think that none of these would happen if you were there. if things had gone as planned, maybe you’d have even waken up and drink a cup of tea in your room as you re-read the whole story once again.

“I mean, it takes two to tango,” you mock. cairos frowns.

“shut up.”

cairos has no serious injuries, but you tell him that he also needs to go and take a rest instead of waiting for him to wake up. although he tries to protest, the tiredness takes over his body, and he leaves as he keeps repeating to keep him updated.

and then you hear him shouting your name. you panic as you think he needs something, or is in pain.

“you okay?” you ask. he seems relaxed for a second.

“I really should have locked you up, right?” he smiles. after seeing him in such anger, you don’t know if you should be laughing at his “jokes”.

“it’s not my fault you can’t decide whether someone is needed or not.” you sneer.

“you are very much needed, just not there.” he says. you can see how tired he is, and you can’t help but cringe whenever you see his bandaged wound.

“I think you should rest now,” you say, “we can talk it out when you’re better.”

he nods. “but you’ll stay here, right?” he asks. “I mean, in case something happens. I have lost so much blood, you see.” he adds quickly. like he’s a silly kid ashamed of thunders and wants to sleep with his parents.

“of course.” you smiled.

***

luka truly has been enjoying the past week. the story is not supposed to go this way because well, you should be dead by now, but the author should’ve written that part better, no?

but he likes the fact that you’re always around to take care of him, as he makes it obvious you are the reason he’s got hurt when cairos had to leave him for more than half an hour.

and you truly feel guilty, not because of going there, but because of coming back. now the main character is badly injured, and you are still alive. you are still not in your own world. so you do whatever he needs, and you even treat him so nicely that he honestly considers getting injured more often.

yet, when he is finally all recovered, and the next chapters are even more dangerous for you, for him, for everyone; he decides he doesn’t give a damn about completing the story correctly, nor does he care about going back.

you can’t leave. you physically can’t.

and he’ll make sure of it.

[cornliastreett]

BED CHEM ⎯⎯ chapter two

drew starkey x singer!reader

NAVIGATION !

BED CHEM MASTERLIST !

PREVIOUS CHAPTER | NEXT CHAPTER

001. NOTE

thank you so much for all the love on this fic so far! i didn’t think that many people would be reading this on here. so thank you!

IT WAS ANOTHER WEEKEND IN LOS ANGELES, WHICH MEANT ANOTHER EVENT FILLED WITH CELEBRITIES AND INFLUENCERS. You didn't even know what the event was for anymore, you had met so many people that night, shaken so many hands and repeated your name so many times that it had slipped your mind what you were actually there for. It had also slipped your mind that Madelyn had messaged you that morning to tell you she was attending the same event. So you hadn't remembered to look for Madelyn. You also hadn't had the time to, even if you had remembered.

But Madelyn had remembered. She had been looking for you the minute she stepped foot on the carpet that night. Even when she had bumped into Drew that night, she was still looking for you. But Madelyn didn't want Drew to know she had been looking for you the entire time the two had been talking. So she tried to act as though she wasn't even sure if you were there. "I think Y/N/N is here tonight, I should text her." Madelyn had said, slipping her phone out of her bag. Not even sure if you would have your phone on you to see the message.

Drew had frowned. "Who the hell is Y/N/N?" He hadn't a single clue who Madelyn was talking about.

"Sorry, Y/N." Madelyn corrected herself, thinking using your name would be clearer. Not everyone called you ‘Y/N/N'.

"I'm still confused." The frown stayed on Drew's face.

It was then Madelyn's turn to frown. "Y/N Y/L/N?" She questioned. But the confused look stayed on Drew's face. "Come on, Drew." Madelyn spoke about you enough for Drew to have recognised the name.

"Am I supposed to know who that is?" Drew asked her, before taking a sip from his drink.

"Drew...I am shocked." Madelyn couldn't believe Drew didn't have a single clue who you were. Madelyn's best friend for the past two years.

"Is this the same person you talk about all the time? The singer." It was as though a lightbulb went off in Drew's head. All the times Madelyn spoke about you, he had suddenly remembered.

"Yes!"

"Right. I still don't really know who she is." Although he knew you were friends with Madelyn, he still wasn't sure who you were. Had never seen you anywhere before or listened to any of your music. For all he knew, Madelyn could have been making you up.

Madelyn rolled her eyes and looked back down at her phone to text you. "I'll introduce you to her. She's amazing, you'll love her."

"Sure." Drew knew Madelyn was only saying that because she loved you. It wasn't as though he'd become friends with you, or even see you again. At least so he thought.

A good 20 minutes had passed. The topic of you had been left and Drew and Madelyn continued to speak about other things. Till a familiar face walked into sight. "Y/N/N!" Madelyn shouted for you, hoping she was loud enough for you to hear.

You had finally been given a minute to breathe and was on your way to grab a drink when you heard somebody calling your name. "Oh my God, Maddie." You had never been so happy to see your friend. You approached Madelyn, completing missing for a second that Madelyn had been standing with somebody else. You quickly wrapped your arms around your friend, giving her a squeeze. "Please save me. I haven't had a minute to even think since I got here." You had said as you hugged your friend.

"Okay, Miss Popular." Madelyn laughed as she released you from her hold.

You then pouted. "I've missed you." Two months without having time to see each other was too long. You two had been inseparable since the moment you met two years ago.

"I missed you too." Madelyn mirrored your pout. She then heard a cough from beside her. "Oh, Y/N/N, this is Drew." Madelyn had completely forgotten Drew was beside her. But you had noticed. His piercing stare had caught your attention the moment you saw him standing with Madelyn. "Drew, this is Y/N."

You had a hunch it was Drew standing beside Madelyn. You’d obviously never met him before but you had seen the odd photo, and had watched Outer Banks before. Madelyn also spoke about him a lot. "Ah, the famous Drew Starkey." You smiled at him. "It's nice to finally meet you. I've heard a lot about you." Your smile grew and Drew had almost forgotten to reply.

"You have?" He raised an eyebrow.

You nodded. "Yeah. From Maddie, Chase. You're probably the only one I hadn't met." You had seemed to have met all of Madelyn's costars and friends except for Drew.

"Well, it's nice to finally meet the Y/N/N that Madelyn won't shut up about." Drew smiled, feeling himself feeling strange under your gaze.

"Aww." You turned to Madelyn.

"It's true, I do talk about you a lot." Madelyn said, nodding her head. She wasn't embarrassed about it, you knew how much Madelyn adored you.

You were about to turn back to Drew, say something else but you were interrupted by your name being called. "Y/N." The voice of your manager filled your ears and you winced.

"Oh no, I'm being summoned."

Your manager approached you from the side, gently placing her hand on your shoulder. "Sorry to interrupt, but there's somebody I want you to meet."

"Okay, coming." You smiled and nodded, before turning back to Madelyn and Drew. "Sorry, I can't stay and chat." You told them both. You then looked towards Madelyn. "We'll meet up soon, okay?" Madelyn nodded. You then turned to Drew. "And it was nice to meet you, Drew." You gave him a smile, your cheeks flushing but you didn't notice.

"Yeah, you too." Drew mirrored your smile, and your flushed cheeks. You then disappeared into the crowd and Drew never saw you again that night. But your face and your voice spent the night in his head. He couldn't seem to think about anything else, even for days after.

yourusername posted a photo !

liked by zendaya, joeyking and 1,063,622 others

yourusername in a sheer dress

view all 2,673 comments

user god damn GOD DAMN

user she’s so hot and she knows it

madelyncline fuck you’re so hot

↳ yourusername fuck i love you

user hope she’s working on her new album

↳ user she hasn’t even toured eics yet, give her a chance

joeyking PLEASE GIVE ME A CHANCE

↳ yourusername like i wouldn’t date the fuck out of you if either of us swung for the other team

user caption sounds like a song lyric

tags: @esquivelbianca @ts1mp0ne @fruitcakerafe @anothertimegirl @soincredible @ursogorgeous13 @drewsephrry @sabrina-carpenter-stan-account @hypnotizedstarkey @sereneera @glitteryfurything @harrys-housewife @st8rkey

[cornie-heesan]

Nobody Knows

Staring| Huang Renjun x fem!reader

Prompt| secret fwb —> lovers

Description| Renjun likes to stake his claim on the person whose bed he spends the most time in.

WARNINGS| fem!bodied reader, AFAB anatomy, secret fwb —> lovers, marking, possessive Renjun (yum), hair pulling, cursing (like a lot), unprotected sex (don’t, you’ll get pregnant and d*e), pwp, drunk friends making assumptions, a smidge of angst, makeup sex- in a car.

Word count| 3.2 k

A/N| life’s been life and I get all these ideas to start new works but I can’t quite follow through with them. I’ve been on a Renjun kick lately, he makes the serotonin in my brain work.

Without any fraction of a doubt, you belonged to Huang Renjun- even if not everyone knew that. Your skin is always littered with some type of possessive markings, hickies, bruises, and bite marks- when asked about it you would just shrug it off like nothing ever happened. 

You met Renjun during first-year biology along with Haechan and Jeno- all three of them had been pledges with the notorious NCT fraternity. Where in the time of that class you had learned far too much about their frat brother Mark’s sex scandal that happened with his girlfriend and some of the members. Although, it’s all taken with a grain of salt because this was coming from Haechan- a notorious gossip. 

Eventually, after enough group projects you found yourself becoming closer to Renjun- finding out that the “Pure Boy” was quite the flirt whenever his friends weren’t hogging your attention. It started with innocent touches- caressing your thigh with his fingertips as he drove a very drunk Jaemin, Haechan, and Jeno back to the house (he asked you to come as moral support), playing with your hair or hands during a particularly boring lecture.

You made no efforts to stop the man- simply just following suit- pressing your breast against his back whenever you gave him a back hug. Pressing your lips against his cheek after he’d worked tirelessly to tutor you in physics you managed to swing an A on the final. 

Sleepovers had become mandatory in your unspoken friendship- especially after you had moved into an apartment off campus. Renjun would often find himself over at your place with his face down in your lap watching listening some rerun of friends as your fingers caressed his hair- far too many drinks had been shared amongst the frat brothers, officially getting the newest pledges (and Renjun’s roommate drunk). 

However, your idle talk was interrupted once again by your noisy upstairs neighbor and his flavor of the week. Your fingers tightened around Renjun’s hair making him grunt- god how this entire situation played out differently in his head. If it were up to him there’d be no barriers between his mouth and the apex of your thighs. His hands move to grip your thighs to push himself up  looking into your eyes 

“Should we fuck louder than them to assert our dominance?” 

Your cheeks burned that pretty pink color that appears when he endlessly flirts with you- it makes him want to bite you, affectionately of course. Your rounded eyes blink back at him a few times while you nervously bite your lip. Reflexively Renjun’s thumb reaches up to pull your lip from between your teeth

“Come on pretty girl, what’s going on in that head of yours?” He hums lust-filled eyes dragging across your face, causing your thighs to clench. He clicks his tongue shaking his head, sitting up fully he skillfully pulls your legs to straddle his hips, “Junnie,” you mumble with a pout on your lips.

Before you could even think about it Renjun’s lips were hot and brushing against your own. Your fingers tugging against his locks with a bit more force than previously- instead of holding the back of your head Renjun’s hand rests directly under your jaw, fingers curling around your throat. A whine slips from your lips as you roll your hips against his making his fingers squeeze against you.

“I need you Jun” you gasp roughly grinding down on him to get some type of friction between your thighs “Please,” want burns through your body. Before you know it you’re dropped onto your bed as Renjun tears at your clothes to expose every inch of your body.

"God, the things I can't wait to do to you," he mumbles nipping the skin of your thighs "I've been on your mind Junnie?" you hum, fingers deftly pinching and playing with your nipples "Constantly" he murmured before diving into your pussy. You would've never guessed it from Renjun but dear god is this man a sloppy pussy eater.

A mixture of spit and slick coated the inside of your thighs a moan, slipping from your lips as Renjun buries two of his fingers deeply Into your cunt. A loud slap fills the room as the delayed sting of your thigh rolls through your body. A debauched moan ebbs from your throat as Jun digs his fingers into the meat of your thigh moaning against your glistening slit.

The familiar tingle in the pit of your belly surges through you as Renjun continues his brutal pace against your swollen clit. He pulls his mouth away eyes burning across your body as his fingers curl and drag against that spongy spot inside of you. His eyebrow quirks as a smirk slowly ebbs onto his lips, "You've got the messiest little cunt, don't you sweetheart?" you squirm under his dark eyes trying to pull away from his fingers.

He clicks his teeth at your attempt to get away wrapping a firm hand around your thigh and holding you down in place. His hand moves from your thigh and presses down on your belly making his movements quicker as he goes back to fingering your soaking pussy. His movements were precise, "I want you to get messy, pretty girl" he hums adding his thumb into the mix, increasing the pressure on your poor clit.

Before you could even process what he said, an unfamiliar heat ripped through your core, and your ears were met with an unfamiliar moan leaving your throat. His fingers continue to bully against that spot inside of you, muscles spasming with each movement.

"That's it," He drags out with a smirk "Good fucking girl." you feel the wetness of your orgasm pooling against your skin and see it glistening against Renjun's forearm, but he doesn't seem to mind- at least until you're sobbing at the overstimulation.

"Fuck, Renjun!" you moan trying to close your thighs but he's already faced his body between them, meeting your lips with a sloppy kiss. It's rough and rushed as he tries to kick his pants down his legs- to release his cock from the god-forsaken confines of his boxers. There's no preamble, just the pressure of the mushroomed head of his cock pressing into your overstimulated cunt.

"Fuck, perfect fucking pussy," He moans pressing wonton kisses against your chest as he tries to draw his cock out of you "Just for me though, right?" He questions snapping his hips against the backs of your thighs "Yes! Just for you Jun!" you moan clawing at his back.

His movements slow before he has you flipped over to your stomach. One hand holding your hips steady the other. wrapping in your messy hair to arch your back to meet your mouth with sloppy kisses. His movements are relentless, heavy balls slapping against your clit- teeth digging into the skin of your shoulder.

If the two of you weren't so wrapped up in the feeling of each other you may have noticed that the sounds from upstairs had stopped. Your neighbors, for once in the time you've been living in this apartment stopped having loud sex. The 'dominance' aspect of having loud sex to go against your neighbors was something you wouldn't have realized beforehand.

"Jesus Christ, what a good fucking girl!" Renjun's hand reaches down to toy with your clit. Your breath hitches as your core tightens around Renjun's cock as his hand tightens around your neck. He's all but growling into your ear as he ruts against your ass, reaching for his high.

"Jun!" You cry clawing for his arms "Come inside, please!" you're babbling dumbly about how good his cock feels inside of you. His tip is dragging deliciously against the sensitive parts inside of you- tears running down your cheeks. Renjun lets out a deep moan as he settles deeply against your hips- releasing everything he could give you deep inside of you.

Heavy pants are leaving both of you- your head dropped against the bed and Renjun's head is against your shoulder leaving gentle kisses against your skin. You whimper as his cock drags from your abused pussy. You feel the bed shift from the loss of his weight, but you don't question it once you hear the sink tap turn on. He returns with a warm cloth to wipe your thighs clean.

"We're doing this on the regular"

"Obviously"

Now, that the new academic year has rolled around, still the two of you called on one another any time release was needed. It’s not like you were sneaking around behind your friends’ backs, they just assumed the most innocent of things from the “Pure Boy” - although you would argue he was far from that. Your meetups ranged from long nights in your apartment- to quickies in the library’s bathroom - though nobody would surpass Mark Lee live-streaming his girlfriend to his frat brothers.

Speaking of the Canadian he was currently clung to Renjun at a party being held in a frat house “Renjun, dude - you need to get laid. You’re so tense” he giggles eying the Chinese man up and down. You snort from the nearby bathroom while you hold Mark’s girlfriend’s hair out of the way as she empties her guts into the toilet. 

“Don’t need help, thanks though buddy” Renjun huffed trying to lead his frat brother to the couch to at least sit down and try to sober up some. Haechan’s curiosity was peaked when Mark mentioned someone needing to get laid so he dragged Jaemin over towards the couch with him. Something about how the house is having a dry spell, making Mark laugh “Just the 00’s line man, I’m getting pussy on the daily”

“BABE!” His girlfriend cries hugging the toilet tighter as you gently pat her back as another violent retch leaves her body. You glance over your shoulder and lock eyes with Jun’s, annoyance lacing his pretty features because the two of you were on your way out to your place so he could fuck hangout with you- just his luck to be stopped by a drunk Mark and his worse off girlfriend. 

Mark may be the oldest of the younger frat brothers but Renjun's soul begs to differ- as if he's aged 75 years since meeting them all. Mark's girlfriend finally started to get a hold of herself as you helped her stumble over to the sink to rinse her mouth out with some strategically hidden mouthwash.

"Girl, you need to get laid too. All you do is study with Renjunnie." She snorts stumbling over to the couch to flop down next to Mark "Why are Jun and I the only ones getting lectured about getting laid? If I remember correctly you guys haven't been hooking up either," You state glaring at the small group of friends.

Jeno mindlessly picks at his nails as Jaemin and Haechan shove each other with their elbows. Renjun shoots you a look, telling you to drop it. You know you should because these nosy fuckers are going to dig around in your business. 

"Honestly," Haechan sighs dramatically "I'd fuck Y/N if she'd let me." He grins at you, but completely misses the shift in Renjun's body language "Haechan," the Chinese man grumbles "What?" Haechan exclaims "I want to be the lucky bastard who gets to see the freak in the sheets!" at his own words he giggles like a madman "Well that's too fucking bad Donghyuck." Renjun snaps

"Damn Renjunnie, you sound soooooooo jealous." Haechan snorts "Like damn, but also, I want to be the guy marking her up." Your cheeks burn at his drunken confession "Haechan!" You shriek before you can comprehend that Renjun has the curly-headed goof pinned to the floor by his collar.

"If I hear one more word out of your fucking mouth about Y/N, Haechan I swear to god I will bust your teeth in,"

Haechan's eyes widen in shock, honestly, the entire room grows quiet at the change in the normally calm frat brother. They've never seen this kind of reaction to anything out of him- he's usually the level-headed one of the bunch at any given moment. So what's his deal with Haechan now? The one notoriously flirting with girls at any given chance.

"I'm the only lucky bastard that gets to see a goddamn thing."

After the incident at the frat party, you couldn't find it in yourself to address what had happened with Renjun. It had been at least three days since you last left your apartment. Your phone sat ignored on your nightstand as it endlessly dinged with each text, Snapchat, hell, Haechan had even sent you emails.

You were, however, desperate enough to hear Renjun's voice to the point that you were listening to a voicemail that he'd left like it was 1994 again.

'Sweetheart, I really am sorry about what happened at the party,' he sighs into the phone 'God, I can't believe I am saying this but what Haechan was saying made me jealous. I'm not ashamed of that.' He states you can hear the rustle of the phone against his shoulder 'I want nothing more than to show everyone that you're mine just as much as I am yours. You're more than just someone I hook up with, sweets. Fuck' he groans sighing again 'I didn't want to tell you like this Y/N, but I love you. So fucking much, more than a classmate, more than a friend. I love you, and I hope I didn't make some mistake. Just, take care of yourself, okay? I love you.'

Tears burn the backs of your eyes as you listen to his message at least, twenty more times. If you were being honest with yourself, nothing that happened at the party was a catastrophe- not crazy like live-streaming sex with your girlfriend or hooking up with an only fans creator out in public. All Renjun did was stand up and protect your dignity- at least better than you could do yourself.

You're quick to grab your keys before running down the stairs of your apartment building. When you reached the sidewalk it was pouring rain- how cliche of nature. Your legs carry you towards campus, in the direction of that oh-so-familiar frat house before a car horn stops you in your tracks.

"What the fuck are you doing in the rain!?" Renjun's voice drags your attention to the driver's side of the car "I had to come to talk to you!" he shakes his head in disbelief "It's pouring out! Why didn't you just call me?!" He chastises "That's not as romantic Junnie," You pout crossing your arms over your chest "I don't give a damn about romantic. You're going to get sick. Get your ass in the car!" He all but demands dragging you to his car.

The car is warm but quiet as Renjun maneuvers his car through the storm and safely into a staff parking lot close to the NCT house. "Junnie, we could've gone to the frat house." You chuckle "You wanted to talk, so this is where we're going to do it. You know everyone at that house is a nosy fucker." He grumbles sliding his seat back so he can turn to look at you.

"I'm sorry, that I overreacted. I'm sorry that I ditched the party and ignored you over the past couple of days. I was being a little bitch, Jun. That wasn't fair to you." You can't hold back the fountain of words that leave your lips "I'm sorry if I worried you. I guess I'm just over-sensitive to anything that has to do with my dignity."

You sigh fiddling with your fingers "Thank you, for standing up for me. Thank you for always being my rock. Thank you for being you, Junnie." You glance up at him taking in his soft expression before moving across the center console.

"I love you, Huang Renjun" Your lips are chilly as you meet his but, you don't care. Subconsciously you've always known that Renjun was more than a hookup- you cared deeply for him. His hands settle on your hips, "You, Huang Renjun are by far the most important person in my life. For that, I will always be grateful." he grins against your lips squeezing your body closer to him.

In your rush to leave your apartment you had thankfully forgotten to put on panties- leaving you bare beneath the loose running shorts covering your hips. Renjun moans burying two long fingers within the depths of your dripping heat. Your jaw goes slack as your nails dig into his shoulders, trying to ground yourself in the stretch as he works your core open.

"Fuck, I love you pretty girl" he grins nibbling at the skin between your neck and shoulder. Your hips roll as you try and get the delicious feeling of his bulge on your clit. You whine at the loss of his fingers in your core- clenching around nothing as he pulls his cock free from the confiines of his sweats.

"I want your pretty little cunt clenching around my cock until the both of us forget our own names."

He slides in without any argument from my cunt- slick allowing him to easily rut upwards against your cervix. The angle allowing him to hit deeper than any time before during any of your 'hangouts'. Renjun's hands grip your hips tightly dragging your clit against the neatly trimmed hair of his pubic bone.

Subconceously, your core clenches tightly- you can't form any sort of words babbling nonsense. You're trying to reach a peak that only Renjun has ever been able to give you. He tuts slowing you to a halt making a sharp whine leave your lips.

"You're a needy girl, Y/N" he grins tucking loose hair behind your ear "Junnie, need to cum on your cock!" the lust scrambling your senses completely obliterating your filter. He chuckles before lifting you off of his cock before slamming you down against him once more- jesus christ sex has never been so intense.

Renjun doesn't give you a chance to collect yourself before continuing his intense movements- certainly bruising your cervix with the head of his cock. The sound of sticky skin slapping together and heavy breathing between the two of you- no words are shared. Renjun's thumb circles your clit harshly,

The familiar tingle at the base of your spine makes you gasp- "Junnie!" you whine before the familiar break of the internal dam finally snaps within you. You squirt- clenching and unclenching around Renjun's cock as his release fills your core.

Through heavy breaths, you both finally heard the knocking on the car's window. Your body tensed causing Renjun to moan- he tucks your head down before cracking the window open.

"Yes sir?" He says casually to the campus police officer standing outside the car. The officer looks no older than the two of you- cheeks flushed because there's no way he couldn't tell what was happening behind the fogged windows of the parked sedan.

"I-" he stumbled over his words before clearing his throat "Is everything alright?" the officer tried his damndest to sound professional but he fails miserably.

"Right, yes officer everything is okay. I had an argument with the girlfriend." Renjun chuckles "You know how women get. They always need a little reminder."

[tonysbed]

Secrets I keep | Part 9

Lando Norris x sister!reader

Max Fewtrell x norris!reader

summary: You and Max have been dancing around your feelings for years but jealousy gets the best of us all..

not proofread

a/n: i’m calling max and kelly’s baby ‘lovebug’ and don’t specify the gender cause we don’t know it either

series masterlist | previous | next

-

“Please let me babysit them. I love them, and they love me and i’m not alone” You pour at Kelly, who is still unsure “You and max didn’t have time for yourself in ages. Come on, we’ll be fine. I got Alex and.. well Fewtrell but I’ll call Alex” You blink at her.

Max looks at you sceptical but before he can say anything “You guys go! I wanna stay with Yn!” Penelope says, setting down her dolls. You smile at the 5 year old.

Kelly looks at Max, who sighs and shrugs. Kelly looks at you two “The little one can be fed on formula already, right?” Kelly nods “Alright, alright. I do think we both need a break” Max says, sliding his arm around kelly.

“Okay, but if anything happens-“ “You’re the first one I’ll call” You smile at her “We’ll be fine, I promise” You kiss her cheek and clap excited in your hands.

-

yn

liked by kellypiquet, charlesleclerc, maxfewtrell and 628.639 others

yn favourite people in the world (+ fewtrell who just came out of thin air)

maxfewtrell what have I ever done to you?

alexandrasaintmleux 👀

yn Alexandra.

maxfewtrell Im not sure if I should be concerned or scared..

alexandrasaintmleux both.

yn Alex.

alexandrasaintmleux ❤️

alexandrasaintmleux love you 🫶🏻

yn mhm

kellypiquet 😍❤️

*liked by yn*

Landonorris is that..my boat?

yn had to make fewtrell useful, sorry lan

landonorris oh dear lord

user they’re hanging out without Lando 🥹

user the cutest

user I love Alex’s and yn’s friendship omg

-

yn added to their story

[ cap1 : coolest ppl in town | cap2: 💛🐕]

landonorris dare I say you two are become the F word??

the F word? We’re becoming Fuck? Thats a new low even for you. Don’t even know what that means 😂

landonorris Friends, you dumbass

oh! Uh, We’re getting along I guess

Landonorris I see, I see 👀

???

alexandrasaintmleux ❤️❤️

-

“You know, it is really peaceful when you two aren’t trying to kill each other” Alexandra says, petting leo who was sleeping in her lap. You shoot her a look, that she ignores.

Max looks at you, and you look at Alex “You’re impossible Alex” “You love me still” She smiles “I do. But I also wanna throw you off the boat” She gasps dramatically “How dare you!” She tries to hold back her smile.

Penelope comes running “P, I told you. Please no running here! Don’t want you to fall off please” “I can swim!” “Your mother would not be happy. And you keep taking off your vest. Either you put it on or you slow down” She nods “Okay. I’ll slow down.”

“Okay, thank you. What can we do for you?” “Wanted to see the baby” She smiles. You look at Max, who is currently holding the child. P climbs next to him and leans on his shoulder “So pretty” She gently stokes the baby’s arm.

You smile at them and Alex nudges you and wiggles her brows. You swat her arm and look back to the three. Max listens to something P is telling him, but you can only focus on him.

He does look good with kids and- No. No no no. To far.

You shake your head. You can’t ruin whatever was now going on between you two. And if it is just being friends. It would go back the way it used to be.

-

-

You look up from your phone, Alex was also on her phone and Max had his eyes closed. “Daniel wants to tell Lando” Alex looks at you and Max opened his eyes “Tell him what?” Alex asks, sitting up and putting her phone down.

You look at Max, who raised an eyebrow “What have you told him.” “Everything.” “Everything?” “Everything..”

Max’s lips form into a thin line and Alex scoots closer to you “Why?” “Because he thinks we’re dating or something” Max tilts his head “Why would he think that?” “Because we’re hanging out.”

“Is he, i’m sorry but stupid?” “No, hurt and jealous” Alex says. Max looks at her “How much do you know?”

She looks at you and bites her lips “Oh god, also everything?” You nod embarrassed and Max wipes his face “Alright, so what do we do?” “We certainly can’t tell Lando”

“He’d go nuts, probably” Alex says, which Max and you agree to “We’ll find a way. I mean it’s.. OH! It’s almost qualifying!” She yelps.

“Oh shit” Max says, walking inside to turn on the tv. You grab the baby and Alex goes to ask P if she wants to come watch qualifying, which she obviously agrees to. She has to watch Lando and Maxie of course!

Lando gets pole and max qualified 3rd after a one place penalty, that all three of you question “Have we ever had a one place grid drop?” You grimace “I don’t think so..” Max says, rocking the baby to sleep.

Alex shakes her head “But Charles is 2nd!” You chuckle “Yeah, guess that’s good”

-

You were sitting in your apartment, P and the baby were fast asleep in your guest room, Alexandra went home and you were sitting on your couch with Max.

“Do you think he’d actually tell Lando?” Max asks quietly. You shrug “I wouldn’t be surprised, if i’m honest” Max nods “Should we.. before..”

“I don’t know.. who knows if he’s bluffing or not. But Lando gets wind of this from daniel and not one of us, he won’t talk to us ever again.”

“Yeah.” You fall into silence again. Was it really worth telling Lando? You both know you wouldn’t do anything because of him, so why bother? Is it bad not telling him? You’re not lying if he’s not asking technically..

“We can’t just do absolutely nothing.” You agree but your phone lights up “Wait, it’s alex”

You read the texts out loud to him. You both sit in silence for a few moments.

He looks at you and you look at him.

“I..” You sigh and lean your head backwards down the armrest “It’s our choice in the end. We can only asume what daniel would tell him..” Max starts. You sit back up again, tears in your eyes that you try to blink away.

Max doesn’t hesitate and pulls you over to him into his lap. His arms tighten around him “I can’t loose him” “You won’t” “He’d hate us” “We’ll talk to your mum first, how about that?” You nod into his chest.

Max hand makes a soothing up and down motion, calming you slowly down “It’ll be okay” His forehead meets the side of your head. You stay like that for a few minutes until you look at him.

“What do we do?” His eyes struggle to stay at your eyes, and so do yours. You lean in but don’t touch him yet “We shouldn’t..” You whisper “Then why does it feel so right?”

Before your lips can finally meet, your phone rings. You jump and your head snaps to your phone. You climb back to your side “It’s kelly.” You pick up “Hey K.”

“Yeah everything’s great. Both of them are fast asleep.” You smile a bit “Oh uh..Well max is still here. But otherwise no one. Alex went home a few hours ago. We ordered take out after the two fell asleep and now we’re sitting here”

“Okay. See you soon then. Have a great time and wish max good luck!” You chuckle “Love you too!” You hang up and sigh. You kind of throw your phone on the coffee table and squeeze your eyes shut.

“Do you want me to go or…?” Max says quietly. You look at him “I mean it’s getting late and everything…” You nod “You’re right. Uhm.. are you gonna join us to watch the race tomorrow? I mean you normally stream so..” “Yeah, I don’t really wanna stream tomorrow.”

You follow him to your front door “Then sleep well and I’ll see you tomorrow” Max nods “Sleep well.” He smiles tightly and before he rounds the corner of the stairs he looks back one more time.

An unspoken understanding that this is something that needs to be addressed.

-

the chat w ciska (mom) is cut off, but you ask her if she has time and she asks if Wednesday is okay

So.. Daniel is in his villain era and they got interrupted , what a coincidence 😔☝️

[aerinmoriarty]

Yeah, and it really gets to a point where you cannot in good faith ignore Taylor's queerness and still analyze her work with any depth or thoroughness.

I was really scared to make Gaylor content at first because people can be SO hostile. So for a while I tried to just ignore all the queer subtext and like...

It drove me fucking mad. It felt like trying to analyze a film while wearing a blindfold, noise canceling headphones, and a bag over my head. I had to set aside everything I ever learned about feminist symbolism and queer symbolism and queer history and queer relationships, esp everything i knew about the Sewing Circle and the history of sapphic performers in show business.

It was like analyzing Taylor's songs with my hands over my ears while I screamed lalala; i had to ignore so much of what I've learned about media analysis as a whole, too.

It was not good faith analysis, nor was it thorough or deep analysis. It exclusively restricted me to fairly surface level meanings.

There is a reason why non-gaylor theorists are literally years behind us in their analysis, and that is because there are so many doors that only get opened once you accept Taylor as a queer person. There are so many theories that have gaping holes, which magically get filled once you accept her as queer. When I listen to non-gaylor theories, there are just so many holes and inconsistencies, and entire lines and verses that they just cannot make sense of...

Because they're gay...

They're so fucking gay...

...seriously, not even literal ostriches with their heads in the sand can ignore the gay...

And even people who refuse to accept Taylor as queer know she's queer because every time her queer little ass pranced across the eras tour stage in a dykey new outfit, guess the FIRST comments I always saw on social media, every single time...

"Noooooooo THIS IS GONNA MAKE THE GAYLORS INSUFFERABLE," a Hetlor would shout into the void...

(...sooooo yall are admitting it looked gay, right? Cause you're saying we are gonna freak before we even say anything?)

And i think in part they do this to force a lot of gaylor discourse to remain surface level. I have a lot of deeper theories. The absolute, bare minimum starting bar for entry is accepting Taylor is queer. And every time I try to dig DEEP into that, to really re-factor every aspect of Taylor's life and art and career with the understanding that she is queer and consider the deep implications, there's the constant attempts by homophobes to take it back surface level by doubting the entry bar factor of Taylor's queerness.

And it is exhausting.

Because we should not have to wait until one of the Most Successful Queer Women of All Time comes out to heterosexual people's standards to appreciate her as such.

I'm so tired of only being able to celebrate the queer icons I adore and respect when they're dead and gone, or at best when they're old enough to not care about cishet opinions any longer.

Coming out to cishet standards means suffering the violence of a system increasingly built to force others to hate us. Nasty think pieces, being branded a liar or a fraud, losing career opportunities and friends, being the victims of physical altercations... many queer performers have suffered these fates or worse.

I'm just rambling at this point, but the deeper I dig into Taylors work, the more beautiful, magnificent, heartbreaking, powerful and emotionally gripping the story she's telling becomes.

And you're not even appreciating the half of Taylor if you think she's straight.

The large number of songs Taylor Swift has made that are about forbidden love is very telling, if you ask me. Not to mention how she’s constantly referencing Christianity, and churches, and old-fashioned beliefs, and sin, and religion in general. Like, are y’all really not hearing her?

And there’s a huge amount of Taylor Swift songs where she uses the pronoun “you” for the muse, not describing them as a man nor a woman, whilst also mentioning one or more of her past love interests, describing them as “Kens” and “playthings for her to use”, talking about how she’s been toying them around and how they never satisfied her in the same way her current muse does… the boys and their expensive cars have never taken her quite where her current muse does. And isn’t it funny how the muse in question is almost never explicitly stated to be a man in songs like this?

I just find it strange how so many people seem to completely miss this. Taylor Swift haters often use the argument “All her songs are about her exes” when hating on her, but if you ask me, “All her songs are about forbidden love, religious guilt to some degree and how society will never accept her and her love” is much more accurate.

[the-one-with-spider-brainrot]

Something about acceptance and moving forward idk

[horsechestnut]

I think my ideal Steph, Cass, and Tim dynamic would be that they're all best friends, but they can not all hang out together. Like, if you ask any one of them who their best friend is they genuinely will not be able to pick between the other two, but all three of them together triggers each of their insecurities in the worst way and always leads to a fight.

Like, Steph and Cass are so affectionate with each other, and constantly flirting and Tim assumes their teasing, but what if they're not, and oh god is he third wheeling on a date between his ex-girlfriend and his sister? They don't actually want him here, they invited him to be nice and he was to oblivious to realize it wasn't genuine. He should leave. But before he can come up with a believable excuse they've changed topics and... hang on, did Steph just say her dad threw a book at her once? Because so much of Steph and Cass's relationship is built on an understanding that they won't make a big deal when they mention something messed up about their past that they just say stuff like that, but Tim does not have that same understanding. So Tim hears that and instead of rolling with it, it's "Steph you can't just say that like it's not a big deal... why is Cass laughing? You can't laugh at that it's fucked up! I don't care that it was a long time ago!" And now Cass is confused and Steph is angry and Tim feels like shit for probably ruining what they wanted to be a date and frustrated that he's being treated like he's overreacting despite being the only one with a normal reaction to child abuse. Mostly he's terrified that he screwed this whole thing up somehow and neither of them is going to want to hang out with him again.

Meanwhile Steph and Tim are so intrinsically linked to each other. They've shared things they will never share with anyone else, they were each others first love. And Cass understands that, she does, but it's hard sometimes seeing how easy they are with each other. The way Steph knows Tim's upset without having to read his body langue the way Cass does or Tim can predict exactly how late Steph will be to any given situation. More than that though, what truly makes her want to hide away from them, is the history they both had but didn't share. The sly comments about Tim looking like a character Cass has never heard of or jokes that make no sense but send Steph into laughing fits. The kind that when she asks are brushed off with "it was an old meme" or "just a show from when we were kids". The reminders that she isn't normal, she can never really be like them. If she doesn't ask most of the time it doesn't occur to them to explain, it seems so obvious to them. They start doing a synchronized dance from some movie that came out when they were in middle school and Cass slips away into the shadows. Later she gets a string of concerned text that slowly turn angry when she doesn't answer. Cass never tells them what was wrong.

And it's hard for Steph to look at Cass and Tim and not feel jealous, because more than just being friends, they're siblings. They are full members of the club, Bruce's children, let into the fold in a way she never can be. She doesn't even want to be anymore if she's being honest, but it still stings. They'll casually mention family dinner or reference inside jokes from the last Wayne charity whatever and Steph will feel the growing desire in her chest that she can not, under any circumstances, let anyone see. The desire that has caused her so much pain, she will not give it control over her again. And Cass calls Tim Robin sometimes, and he calls Cass Batgirl in return, and Steph has to bite back the urge to scream at them that she was Robin too! She is also a Batgirl! But it doesn't matter because she wasn't Cass's Robin or Tim's Batgirl, and it drives her insane that they're romanticizing that time, because don't they remember how much of an asshole Bruce was back then? And now Tim is mad at her for bring up the past as if they're not the ones who started it, and Cass is assuring her that Bruce has changed, and maybe he has, but it's to fucking late! He already ruined any chance of Steph every feeling fully comfortable with her place in their lives. So she storms off, fuming, leaving a baffled Tim and Cass to go enjoy their stupid family dinner.

So yeah, they are best friends. They all love each other more than they know how to say, and trust each other more than anyone else in the world. But they can never all hang out together. That only ever ends in disaster.

[charliefqirie]

What made you so drawn to Ozzy

you know, i’ve also wondered that myself for a while, but i think i figured it out.

ozzy, at first, did not stand out to me when i first got into the game. ozzy was just, there. my favorite was ted when i started.

ozzy’s a side character that doesn’t have much going for him. literally his only purpose in the game is to be killed. he’s just there to die. and he does not show any likeable traits to the average player, he’s a whiny, annoying, self-centered brat who’s constantly complaining every time you speak to him. he even told madison to take a bath first thing after she escaped (which i really don’t believe makes him a jerk, i mean being covered in unidentifiable slime is kinda gross don’t u think) who would like a character like that? ozzy’s really the most forgettable character in the game. these are thoughts i’ve noticed people always have abt ozzy. i didn’t really share these sentiments and didn’t think of ozzy as annoying but i certainly wasn’t that interested in him before, he was just neutral to me.

buggs and cindy are less liked than the rest of the characters but they’re still more liked than ozzy because they are fun and hilarious characters, with interesting dynamics to explore. i feel like the SLIME GANG, the characters who have like 3 lines of dialog at most get more love than ozzy. gives people a lot of room to explore the potential of what their characters could be. and ozzy? ozzy’s just there.

but maybe, that’s the reason why i started to like him?

i’m not much for genuinely hating characters without reason, the very idea makes me sad and pitiful. i never hated ozzy, he’s just five, of course he’s going to act like that. but i wasn’t that drawn to him back then either. (i also dont like it when people hate on cindy to a concerning extent. like yeah she’s a little brat i can understand why people would dislike her, i don’t like it when that happens but i still understand why people would, but to the point of genuine burning hatred is when it’s concerning and disturbing. she’s still just five. ah, but that topic is for another day. i’ll continue abt ozzy.)

back then in the old fandom, i had a friend who loved loved ozzy a lot, ozzy was their favorite and they cherished him. they shared their thoughts on why they loved ozzy and the potential his character has. it was their love that made me start to appreciate ozzy a bit more. but ozzy was still not my favorite still. i appreciated him a bit more but he was still kind of put to the side with me.

then kg3 got announced.

with the new game coming out, i found myself returning back to my old roots, with new people to share the interest. i didn’t even realize there was still a fandom after all this time. a small one, sure, but it’s still just as lively. it was around this time when ozzy started to shine to me.

i looked back at previous memories, looked back at old kg convo’s with friends, and one person stood out to me. this person, very obviously, hated ozzy. it was upsetting to me to see, especially since i had a friend who loved ozzy. they cut ozzy out of his own canon friend group a lot, made jokes of “who cares abt ozzy” and made his character quite unlikeable in their au’s. made madison break up with ozzy even, and made ozzy into this pathetic mess of an unlikeable character. essentially made him even more unlikeable than canon. all of this, genuinely upsetted me. i hate seeing characters treated like this. maybe they had a valid reason for disliking ozzy, maybe ozzy reminded them of a toxic friend they used to know or smthn, but looking back at old convos and seeing all that ozzy hate really perturbed me. i couldn’t stand seeing characters treated like this. and it was all that hate that made me realized really just how underappreciated and exaggerated ozzy was in the fandom.

seriously, ozzy really wasn’t as bad people thought. and he’s NOTHING like tweek from south park?? he’s not spazzy and nervous at all? he’s really more angry and uptight! (AND BY THE WAY MADISON DID NOT ASK FOR A HUG AND I DONT KNOW WHERE PEOPLE CAME TO BELIEVE THAT SHE ASKED FOR ONE WHEN SHE DIIDDNNNNTTTTTTTTT ITS A COMMON MISCONCEPTION IN THE FANDOM AND IT MAKES ME ANGRYYYYY. LITERALLY LOOK UP A CREATURE FEATURE PLAYTHROUGH, SKIP TO THE END AND YOU CAN SEE SHE DID. NOT. ASK. FOR A HUG. Anyways,) and, he was even willing to make friends with kidd after an act of kindness (which, tragically, ended in ozzy’s demise.) he was just sad. he was just sad and miserable that his friends were gone suddenly, and he lashed out. but people focused on his tantrums, they didn’t focus on why. all they say was a whiny brat who constantly complained and it was all of that that made the fandom turn their backs on him. people didn’t even remember ozzy CANONICALLY HAS FRIENDS. HAS A GIRLFRIEND. madison and ron. barely did i ever see them all in one post. BARELY. i was an avid member of the fandom and saw lots of fanarts and i saw almost NOTHING of ozzy and his friends. ozzy was always by himself. madison and ron were always paired with alice. ozzy was literally REPLACED with alice to make the slime gang. ozzy’s friends were paired with alice instead. ozzy was fucking replaced and it made me genuinely upset to see. did no one fucking pay attention to that? did everyone really fucking forget when ozzy literally complained about missing his friends all the time? why was ozzy replaced?

it was all this mistreatment that made me pity ozzy. perhaps this was why i started liking him. perhaps it was out of pity and anger at how much his character was mistreated. and with all this pity, all this anger, it made me pay attention to him more, it made me see his potential as a character.

it opened my eyes.

i started to think abt him more, thought about his good sides and moments, thought abt how fun his character could be and the potential dynamics he could have. and with his little quirks and traits, i even started to headcanon reasons for it. why’s he so germaphobic? haha, perhaps it was dr danner’s fault and he traumatized him. why does he like destructotron so much? perhaps his friends introduced him to it, and now that toy is his favorite, as it is the only memory he has of them now. and, i think ozzy’s more kinder than people think, he opened up to kidd after a single gift, ozzy’s really just mad at the new kids that they took his beloved friends away, but with that single act of kindness made him realize, ah, maybe they aren’t so bad. really, he’s just lonely, you know? my pity for him opened my eyes to how much potential his character has, especially since he wasn’t as developed as the other characters, so i did it myself. i developed him myself, gave him lots of headcanons, as i am passionate about him and i believed in him, all this pity was the stepping stone in me starting to enjoy him a lot, lot more. he has a lot of potential and i want to use it. i believe he’s an underappreciated lovely, lonely child who’s angry at the world. and i like to believe he’s genuinely kinder than people think, and that he cares. (i believe he felt a heart dropping amount of guilt when he told madison to take a bath. how could he say that after seeing her again? his germaphobia is somethign he cannot control and he hates it, it inconveniences him and now it’s inconveniencing his loved ones and he hates it. i believe the next day, he gave madison (knowing that she already took a bath ofc) a hug and a gift because he truly missed her and felt guilty he couldn’t hug her before.) he loves and cares and he laughs and cries. he loves his friends and he loves his toy and he loves his games. and i cherish him, and i want to give him something to be happy about. i want to be part of the tiny tiny club that truly enjoys ozzy as a character because he deserves it. he deserves some people who genuinely like him in this cruel fandom who only saw him and ignored him because of his whiny tantrums.

I believe he’s a good character and I like him.

perhaps it is pathetic to be so passionate about a fictional character, but does it really matter? i am still passionate. i am passionate and it gives me a drive.

[wewringmagicfromtheordinary]

#it’s perfectly valid to interpret steve bucky as platonic but why should we#platonic male friendships is literally the norm of superhero and military genres#the writers and directors and actors all admitted bucky was the emotional lynchpin for steve’s story#seb didn’t put his whole pussy into giving steve/cevans the sad gay gaze just for bucky to be straight 😂#the world has its share of straight macho heroes#let them be soft and let them be gay 😌 via luna-rainbow

#I get that there are different interpretations of a text#but like Bucky is very much central to Steve’s journey to becoming who he’s supposed to be#he’s the guy he’s avenging in Captain America: The First Avenger#Cap 2 is literally Steve: Bucky#CACW sees Steve going against half the Avengers to defend Bucky#idk I feel like you missed a lot if you don’t think Bucky was that important#and also like even if you just want to see them is good pals or whatever#it shows a lack of comprehension of a very simple story#or at least that it’s interpreted through a biased lens#as for Steve joining the army you have every valid reason to think it wasn’t purely for Bucky#but it’s very conveniently stated that Bucky’s regiment is the one he requested to join moments before he was rejected#so whether Joseph and Bucky coincidentally happened to be in the same regiment we can only guess#but it’s very plausible he was just lying to be in the same regiment as his best friend via cosmicmechanism

#whether you ship it or not (which is irrelevant btw?) in canon Bucky is a huge part of Steve's motive...#as explicitly stated by Steve himself when literally asked by Bucky what his motive is the night before Bucky is shipping out...#in the movie named after avenging Bucky -- which makes no mention of Joseph 🤦‍♀️#this ain't rocket science folks!#sidenote: this is ALSO technically bad writing in the sense...#...that longtime-friend Bucky (who has ALREADY made explicit references to his knowledge of Steve's propensity to get into fights)#...wouldn't/shouldn't need to ASK Steve why he wants to fight... sth he would (obviously!) already know!#could've easily written dialogue where they discuss Steve's motives organically (so Erskine can overhear his Hero Monologue)#...without making such an obvious rookie writing error#but that's just my opinion! 👀☕#'I don't like this ship I'll pretend I'm too dense to see it' ok that's embarrassing and a skill issue not an argument#listen fox & friends if you see some queers whose existence upsets you just clutch the pearls and move on#no need to clog up this poor person's inbox with flimsy cringe rationalisations via amarriageoftrueminds

No offense but I think maybe people are overstating the influence Bucky had especially on Steve's desire to join the army. Maybe he was influenced by his father Joseph even though he never met him more? Like he didn't just want to join the army he wanted to join the 107th because originally that was the division his father was in. Bucky joined but Steve wanted to join even before that because of his father. Kind of like Luke Skywalker wanting to go off in adventures because of the image of his father.

I normally take these asks in good faith but do you know how passive-aggressive it is to start a conversation with “no offence but”? Because not only are you aware you’re about to cause offense you’re also intending to.

Canon doesn’t give us a lot to go on in terms of Steve’s inner thoughts about joining the army. The interpretation that Joseph was the inspiration is perfectly valid. As is the interpretation that Bucky’s draft was the motivation. And I’m not sure why they have to be mutually exclusive?

I will say though, because the MCU was very thin on details for Steve’s parents, many fanfic writers turned to the comic books for inspiration. The 616 iteration of Joseph, an alcoholic (likely from untreated PTSD) who subjected Sarah and Steve to abuse, is likely the reason many fans don’t lean into him being an inspirational figure for Steve.

The Cap fandom is big and diverse, and all kinds of headcanons exist. All I can say is you need to curate your experience better if seeing Steve-Bucky centric headcanons bothers you this much.

[skrunksthatwunk]

idk if i've discussed it before (i have certainly THOUGHT about it) but someone on my kuwa suffering ep 89 comp mentioned it and i just had to go off about it like. ok. sensui tells yusuke something along the lines of "you heard itsuki" when itsuki's inside the uraotoko, implying that not only can sensui hear those inside the uraotoko, but that he expects yusuke to be able to as well. which means that yusuke Almost Certainly Heard And Kind Of Ignored kuwabara's prolonged mental breakdown and wailing about how much he needs yusuke to live etc. which. guHHH i hate him yusuke you ass but also listen.

the only acknowledgement yusuke gives to this (if any) is when he says something like "sensui you're sooo fucking cooked this plan's going perfectly (my friends are going to get strong and kill you when i die)." he's trash talking to sensui, ignoring the others because, i think, he doesn't want to acknowledge what he's doing to them.

yusuke is explicitly recreating the experience he had with kuwabara's "death" at the hands of toguro, complete with the announcement of intent (and power) to kill, the inability to impede the threat in any way (barring a power-breakthrough), and the target in some way racing towards/volunteering for their death. yusuke learns through doing, and through tough love-style approaches. it's only effective if it hurts. watching kuwabara die like that was devastating to yusuke, but it sure as hell fucking worked. he beat toguro because of that maneuver. so even if he has to (re-)traumatize his friends in the process, this method will make his friends stronger, and he feels confident in that. but he never had to live with the consequences of kuwabara's death, not really. that's something hiei makes clear before they enter the cave as well, that there are no fake-outs ready to make him or anyone else stronger. the only deaths here will be real. the only power gained will come at a high, permanent cost. hiei's warning is an attempt to keep everyone alive, to keep yusuke from being stupid. and then yusuke decides to take that fatality into his own hands, but it's kind of his friends who would pay the price. he's going to make them live through the days, months, years without him, the actual permanency of loss (assuming they survive for that long), something he never experienced with kuwabara (a new facet of that traumatic scenario), AND he's escaping the emotional fallout of this choice through death. he doesn't have to see them mourn, won't get yelled at, won't watch them fail to move on. he's tapping out and choosing to believe they'll be fine.

but i think he feels guilty. just a little. i mean, yusuke couldn't even believe that people cared about him enough to want him alive in episode one. he's staked everything on his friends, which means he still kind of... doesn't value his own life, at least not compared to theirs. but he believes his friends love him and want him around, and we know that because he has to, or else he wouldn't make a plan that depends entirely on that love. he is actively leveraging the care he doesn't think he deserves, trying to hurt them in a way he is intimately familiar with (only worse), for.... what, exactly?

this is kind of my sticking point tbh. i don't think the answer is... super clear, but let's start with what it's not.

yusuke is not doing this because it is the most practical way to save all of humanity; that would be the mafukan, which he stopped. it could be a gamble to save all of his friends? the mafukan strategy would guarantee koenma's death/eternal imprisonment, whereas this strategy gambles all of humanity on the chance that his friends come out of the Easy Break Oven strong enough to avert the end of the world. if the sacrifice of even one friend is completely intolerable, perhaps he'd accept those slim odds and their steep consequences. yusuke tends to take risks like that, especially when he's got fight-induced tunnel vision. he doesn't think things through too much; his schemes are usually dependent on surprising his enemy enough to oneshot them. truthfully, i think this is the closest we'll get to an answer, and it's a more conventional one for this kind of story. but there is another layer i haven't been able to get from my mind.

i think yusuke is gifting each of his friends an honorable warrior's death.

so, in case it needs saying, yusuke, kuwabara, kurama, and hiei all (at least once, if not several times) exhibit a desire to die in combat in a way they deem noble to give their lives purpose (usually by self-sacrifice, but sometimes by another metric of honor, like hiei's duel with shigure and his desire to die in mutual defeat against an evenly matched opponent; or even kurama's decision to fight shigure in his human form, displaying a sort of passive suicidality via placing being true to himself in this (somewhat symbolic/inconsequential) way over survival). they need to make their lives count for something, because they feel guilty for being alive (kurama and hiei feel guilty for their past actions (hiei's is most evident in his distance from yukina, though that's not its primary reason), hiei, kuwabara, and yusuke have all been ostracized and made to feel like burdens on/unwanted by their caregivers and general society; all four of them have felt profound isolation even from their loved ones (yusuke and hiei are rather obvious; kurama can never tell his mother about the majority of his life nor what she truly means to him in the context of it; and kuwabara is separated from his peers for his spiritual awareness and his "stupidity" (plus his parents aren't around? and he is Desperate to define manhood/manliness through a broader pop cultural one which includes the warrior sacrifice thing bc he has no male role models BUT that's for another post) (i will admit kuwa's the most tenuous one here irt isolation)). they want to die for a cause so badly it's actually physically painful to me. it is passive suicidality, and they define their lives and identities by their relation to, engagement with, and skill at doing violence, etc. they live to die by the sword. anyway. nobody talks about it but i think it's very important to understanding what yusuke's doing here.

because i think he knows that about himself and his friends. they're kindred spirits. at the very least he knows this about kuwabara, who literally made a speech about this before diving into toguro's fingers In The Event That He Is Recreating Explicitly. he is dying nobly like they all want to on the chance that they'll get to break out and fight sensui rather than dying without even getting to take a swing. it's about his pride and theirs. but i don't think yusuke necessarily believes they'll win. he knows better than anyone how strong sensui is, and how wide the gap is between sensui and team urameshi. his stated position that humanity is doomed and that he doesn't care about its fate is, i think, not completely genuine, but if we take it at face value, he's not killing himself so that his friends can survive the end of the world. something's going to come around and kill them eventually. he's doing it so they can survive long enough to fight sensui. he needs them (specifically kuwabara) to be strong enough to free themselves to begin round two. but he's given up on their side winning, on humanity surviving, on his own victory---why should he think his friends are capable of winning? this could be another case of yusuke's fight-blinders. it could be another gamble, more blind faith put in his friends. but honestly it reads more to me that yusuke's giving them a chance to die together on the battlefield. them winning would be great, but it's not his goal. it's a pipe dream.

he knows he's going to be killed. they're probably going to be killed, too. but to make it so they last a little longer against sensui, to make the odds a little more even, so they are killed not like livestock, but like worthy fighters, he'd die a little faster. it's the best kind of death someone like them can have; and he'll deprive himself of it just to make their ends a little sweeter. even if the road to that is far more bitter.

but it's not like yusuke's friends know what he's thinking or agree to it, and he can't exactly make his case for it in the moment. he's making that choice for them. whatever his intentions, whatever odds he thinks they have of beating sensui, he's kind of sealing all of their fates. so how the hell is he supposed to acknowledge kuwabara screaming at him not to die, trying desperately to express what yusuke means to him in what could be their final moments together? this plan is going to hurt his friends terribly. it is already doing so, and he can hear it. his choices to stop koenma from using the mafukan and to die for his friends' strength are both selfish in some way, no matter how you read the scene. if yusuke comforts kuwabara, he might not get strong enough. if he twists the knife, well... how could he forgive himself? and either way by responding he would have to face them all and say yes, i'm doing this regardless of your feelings (with the intention of hurting you). so i think he does what he often does. he avoids it. he lets that emotion glance off him and his bravado and his one-liners so he doesn't have to deal with the fact that he's hurting people, that he's scared and guilty and unsure of himself. that he's about to die again, about to put kuwabara through the grief he saw at his wake again, only worse; about to put his quieter friends through something similar.

yusuke is confronted with the responsibility one has to the people who care for them, and he runs from it in an attempt to give them some small peace. just like when he died before and thought hey, at least my mom and keiko won't be burdened by me anymore. because the only thing he can really do for them is die.

[possamble]

realizing im kind of a weirdo about laios and marcille

[lookingupatthesamemoon]

✨When you get this, list 5 songs you like to listen to, publish. Then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite accounts (Positivity is cool)!!🎶✨ /nf

AHHHH CAITIE ☹️❤️ thank u for thinking of me ☹️❤️ u are the awesomest ever 🫶 choosing just five songs was very tough !!! i ended up just choosing 5 of my all-timers :)

[anastacialy]

y'know, i keep making a habit of swinging my bat at hornets nests, but i have to say i'm getting so, so tired of people complaining about shows not making perfect sense when they aren't even close to done. we're four episodes into this season of doctor who. we're four episodes into this season of bridgerton. and yet in both fandoms i keep seeing people whine that such and such didn't make sense or it wasn't explained all the way and by god you guys i think maybe explanations might come later in the season. this is something most viewers will recognize as being called a 'plot.'

[lousylemonseminar]

Gawwshhhh darrnit I had this post about

IM NEVER GONNA COOK LIKE THAT AGAIN it like left my mind as soon as I had it written down And it’s not loading in But I had this post about how

Wild comparison but how suckenings Edward and Jimmy mouthwasher fuck are both these derrangged egoists

How they both thinnk theyre so untouchable And Individual in this. Corrupt mind boggling way

I NEED IT TO LOAD IN CAUSE I FONT THINK I CAN PHRASE IT AS GOOD AS I DID

Like how did you get that perception of yourself Do you care if that’s the reality? If anyone outside of your delusions think You’re A Hero or Your

I don’t even actually really know what Edward’s deal is Handsome???? (He’s kind of just a man baby but they both are I think it’d be easier to understand how Jimmy would inadvertently perceive himself Despite that being what he’s trying to prove throughout the entirety of mouthwashing)

And if so Then Why are you going so desperately to prove it by harming and violating literally everyone else?

It’s so

Fascinating to study villains I guess in these instances And to understand how they get to making irl fortnite like WHAT ARE YOU DOING (documenting its process)

They’re trying so hard to prove these grandiose versions of themselves, never realizing that they are The Only People they’ll ever prove that to

How both of them started at such a bottom feeder level Taking shortcuts to get someone anyone to think theyre more than they actually are But they’ll never be more Because theyre focusing on the wrong thing!!

They’re trying to get people to see them as this omnipotent god when all they’ll ever be is people!!!

The control they try fastening into anyone they have this Deluded sense of power over or “is the weakest” is like….. So abjectly incomprehensible and pathetically cruel

I NEED to understand how they get the notion they can do whatever they want and crash the space ship to avoid consequences…….