#i think the mi ladies would be great idols

[mlady-magnolia]

Ilsalanna x Oshi no Ko

[dangermousie]

Hi dangermousie I would like to ask for some recs, if you're feeling up for it. I love great characterization, a good story, and a mystery or genre mashing but like. At least good characters lol ToT. So The Wolf gave us Darren Wang, and Monarch Industry gave us that handsome general - any more cdramas with handsome male leads you can think of, more of that vibe rather than the super-pretty idol dramas tend to have? I'm guessing Novoland and Secret of The Three Kingdoms may have that?

(2) My other rec ask is: any dramas with a regular person and a royal as the leads? I can think of a few that are demon/heavenly clan (I'm VERY into if they have a happy ending let me know like Xuanji/Sifeng), but pretty much all the historical/costume dramas I've seen are 2 royals (which was good but I'm looking for a specific setup lol). Goodbye My Princess almost has that feel just because the 2 leads come from such different societies, and I'm looking for more stories where the leads really feel

(3) (part 2) like they came from very different backgrounds/lives. LWSS kind of gives me that feel, Guardian definitely did, Romance of Tiger and Rose did while the main love was a pirate (but I think he's actually a noble so it didn't stay so very different), Till Death Tear Us Apart they came from quite different bgs (loved that drama). Bonus if its a historical drama/costume drama since I'd love more contrast like what Goodbye My Princess had, potentially even more. But idk what's around...

Oooooh, I love this ask!

Handsome but a bit grizzled male lead? That is my favorite thing in the world despite cdramas not going for that much. I say skip Secret of Three Kingdoms if you want that because despite the fact that I am very fond of both Elvis Han and Ma Tianyi, neither is really manly - Secret is really more like idol take on Three Kingdoms. As to Novolands, Novolands Tribes and Empires is definitely gonna satisfy that need, but Eagle Flag leads are pretty young though definitely not in the least pretty or idolish.

Now, on to other recs for this. Well, let's be honest - you can't do better than Three Kingdoms 2010. It's an amazing drama in its own right but if one has a Daddy thing *ahem my finger is not pointing at self nope nope* you might as well be in the brothel with this drama.

There is also The King's War with Peter Ho and Chen Daoming. The upcoming Imperial Age also looks wonderful on that score if it ever leaves development hell.

Honestly, your best bet for that sort of thing is in hardcore historicals. But if you want something less of that genre, how about The Longest Day in Chang'an? Nirvana in Fire 2? Vigilantes in Masks? The Lady and the Liar? General and I? Love and Fight with a Terracotta Warrior? Demi Gods and Semi Devils 2003 (I think that's the year - with Hu Jun and Jimmy Lin), Story of the Han Dynasty (I have a thing for Hu Jun, sue me.)

Regular person and royal as leads.

Imperial Doctoress (she is a doctor, he's an emperor. It's a solid drama.) Novoland Eagle Flag (one of the main trio is a concubine born son of a minor gentry person, his OTP is a literal princess.) Jade Palace Lock Heart (I love this drama!!! - Feng Shao Feng is a Qing prince, Yang Mi is a modern day time traveler.) Sound of the Desert (he's a general/prince and she's a random nomad girl), The Myth (she's a princess, he's a modern day time traveler. I love that drama), Colourful Bone (sort of - he ends up being the emperor but for the bulk of it he's a bodyguard with no idea who he is and she's a princess), Princess Jieyou (well she turns out to be a princess but either way she marries into a barbarian land and so there is a bunch of culture shock), Princess Agents (she’s a slave, both dudes are princes.)

Hope this helps!

[jaeyunluvs]

you’re mine - aron piper

Requested by @fashphotolife : yeah just like a hot jealous aron bc like ugh that’s probably hot 🥵Not really a specific request but just like a hot jealous aron Piper imagine

A/N: AHH I LOVE JEALOUS IMAGINES!!!!! Thank you so much for requesting! I saw many people doing the jealous interview thing, like buzzfeed interviews and stuff, it’s gonna be similar to that !

disclaimer: i don’t know any of these people personally, i made some characters up! english is my second language so please let me know if i have mistakes! :) also poor spanish, i’m sorry profesor

note: im sorry i used starbucks, pls don’t sue me that’s the only international coffee brand i can remember!  it’s unedited :))

word count: 1,5K

warnings: none but hot jealous aron is on his way ;) oh and crappy writing :’)

gif creds to @piperaron​ - <3

“Y/N! Come on! We’re getting late!” Your boyfriend Aron warned you at the phone. He was downstairs, waiting for you. You were getting prepared for the live interview with the Elite cast, including you. 

“Okay, okay!” you said on the phone and closed. You wore a white elegant dress and kinda revealing but you didn’t mind cause you looked amazing. When you ran downstairs you saw a curly head in a car, looking in your direction.

“Wo-w, hola carina” He stared at you, breathless. 

“hi babe!” You get in the car and kissed him on the lips. He still stared at you so you decided to speak up.

“earth to Aron! you there?” you stared at his brown eyes filled with love. He blushed and looked away kinda embarrassed.

“Lo siento amor you’re just to beautiful!” Now it was your turn to blush. He giggled, placed a kiss your lips and started the engine.

You wanted to stop and get coffee on your way. Aron wanted to come to get coffee with you. It was your local starbucks shop.

“Do you remember our first date was here?” Aron asked. You glanced and felt the nostalgia. 

“You were super nervous I can’t believe how you changed so much.” You answered smiling. He managed to laugh.

“Maybe you’re the reason why I’m changed” He stared at you. You giggled at his cheesiness.

“Hi can I get your order?” You and Aron were interrupted by a good looking employee asking for your order.

“Hi, can I get a Latte Macchiato please?” you asked.

“What’s your name?” He asked, looked like smiling.

“Y/N” you said not caring enough.

“I like your name just a pretty name for a pretty lady” he said not caring about the guy next to him. 

You were taken aback by the compliment with saying a simple thank you without emotion but before you could say anything more, Aron pushed you to his side, can’t tell that you guys are dating because you weren’t public.

“Careful big guy, she has a boyfriend and I’ll kick anyone’s ass if I see someone flirting with her.” He was raising his voice. You hold him down.

“Aron, Aron stop, stop, chill” you looked at him you knew he gets calmer when he looks you in the eyes. When he calmed down, you ordered for him. The poor barista was watching you guys on shock and fear. 

You paid and mouthed a sorry for his actions. He didn’t say anything just a weak smile. You hated when there’s a fight. 

Then you got your orders and when you were leaving Aron shouted. “My eyes on you” to the poor barista and he got so guilty in front of his customers.

You punched him in the arm. “Aron what the fuck? He was a poor boy, and we’re not public you know this is so normal.” You stated. Aron didn’t look at you just walked into the car.

“He can’t just flirt with a random girl especially you!” You held him by his wrist. 

“You know you’re the only guy for me right?” You looked at him with a serious expression. He managed to have a weak smile then continued to ride.

When you were on the interview set, Ester and Danna ran to you. 

“Hola bebe, we should get prepared. Hola Aron, go to the boys room.” Danna said. You waved your hand as a signal of saying “bye” and he did the same. The cast didn’t know you guys were a thing either.

You met the other female cast mates and had your make up artist prepare you. After preparing all the cast got into a room and sat around. You and Aron sat next to each other obviously. 

“Hello ColaStation watchers, I’m Amell Wilson and today, I’m here with the elite cast! we’re going to read fan messages and play “Who’s most likely to?”. Here we go!” He said cheerfully. 

Everyone introduced themselves and the interview started with “Who’s Most Likely To?” 

“Who’s most likely to be single?” Everyone pointed you and Aron. You both laughed. Amell, the interviewer smiled too.

“Who’s most likely to be rule a fashion company?” Most of the cast pointed you and you blushed. “You have a great taste in fashion, carina” Omar said, you thanked him by blowing him a kiss. One of a sudden, interviewer Amell commented “You do have a great taste in fashion Y/N you look beautiful.” He said. 

Aron was startled by this comment and you noticed this but ignored it because everyone was here.

You played the game for awhile, laughed, had fun together. By the interview continued you could see Amell watching you. Aron noticed and cleched his fists but couldn’t do anything.

You eventually had a break after the first game. The cast divided, but most of them went to outside to smoke, including Aron. You and Danna, went to restroom and the preparation room before going back to Aron’s. While you were waiting for Danna outside, you saw Amell approaching you. Oh no you thought yourself.

“Hi Y/N”

“Hello?”

“Umm so I-” Amell was interrupted by Danna. Thankfully because you were getting kinda uncomfortable and you hated making Aron like this

“¿Qué es lo que pasa aquí?” Danna came and tied her arm into yours started walking. 

“No lo se, he came and talk to me.” You made sure. Your look on your face was explaining and Danna trusted you so she didn’t make a scene.

Meanwhile in the smoking session, the boys were talking about how Amell looking at you.

“No lo se porque pero, Amell can’t stop staring at her.” Miguel claimed.

“Yeah it is getting kinda weird” Alvaro started a little laughter. Aron wasn’t paying attention, jealousy was burning inside of him.

“Imagine Y/N, one of the most beautiful girl in the world not being single. I can hear the people crying.” Omar said. Aron just smiled and smirked.

“Like Y/N would date him.” Aron said sarcastically. Everyone looked at Aron and noticed how angry he was. They knew something was behind this.

After thirty minutes, the cast turned back to do the last activity, anonymous fan comments on the actors.

It started with Ester. 

“ ’Ester Exposito is literally queen she’s my idol.’ Awhh thank you.” She blew some kisses to the camera.

“’ Alvaro is so underrated, he is a great actor. Keep up! Love you!’ Thank you so much I love you too!” Alvaro smiled.

“ ‘Aron Piper is that lucky guy to make out Omar. Don’t you think? I’m jealous.’” Omar just laughed and mouthed a thank you.

“’ Aron is literally every girls’ celebrity crush at this point. Thank you Elite creators.’” Aron just smiled and thanked at the comment. When they handed the box over you, Amell continued to stare at you.

“’Y/N is that girl that I would literally die for, I’m so happy she’s single can you marry me?’“ 

“Hahaha he’s kinda right!” Amell laughed and added. And this was the end of Aron’s patience. He couldn’t help but said,

“Too bad she has a boyfriend” He laughed grasping your hand quickly.

Everyone in shock, can’t say anything.

“I KNEW IT!” Itzan shouted

“ALVARO GIVE ME MY 50 EUROS” Jorge said laughing.

You looked at them in shock not knowing what’s going on. Alvaro groaned and gave him the 50 euro bill.

“We get into a bet, I knew you guys we’re dating” Jorge showing you the bill.

“Honestly, it couldn’t have been more obvious but I’m still mad you didn’t tell me” Danna said pouting.

“You guys are so cute together.” Mina said. You were so happy with all the comments you were receiving by the cast. Their blessings were really important. 

“Now, that it’s public, take your eyes off of my girlfriend.” Aron growled at Amell. You can see he was getting scared. They stopped the live and some advertisements to calm down Aron.

“Okay Aron, I think we should end this live and go.” You said holding him. He looked at you, he couldn’t stand your eyes.

After a break, everyone turned back to the interview, but it was super awkward. Amell couldn’t look at any of you.

“Thank you for the dearest elite cast, and thank you for watching. Don’t forget to like and subscribe for more of this content!” Amell said and the turned the camera to the cast to say goodbye.

Aron waved and immediately kissed you on the lips. Everyone was cheering. When you ended the kiss and live, your phone blew up from all of your friends and family.

Sister: ARE YOU DATING ARON? HOW?

Best friend: It’s funny how I know it and everyone’s getting crazy hehe

Brother: I’M GOING TO KICK HIS ASS 

You laughed at all the messages you’ve been receiving, especially your best friend’s. 

After the interview, Danna hold you and forced you to explain everything and all the details about you and Aron. 

“SPILL THE TEA!” Danna shouted.

“Umm so we started dating 3-4 months ago...” You continued to explain while watching everyone’s jaw dropped. For a little while later, Aron came smirking to you.

“Hey ladies, mind if I steal mi novia, for a minute?” 

“No Aron, ella es nuestras amiga.” fought Claudia laughing.

You smiled at girls “I’ll be back in 5″ and they continued to talk.

Aron held you close, holding your hand, pulling you to his side. 

“You’re mine. And no one can ever take you away from me.” He said whispering to your ear with a serious tone. “Especially a guy like A- what Ameelllo?” He said making you laugh with a funny tone this time

“Congrats Aron, you ruined the moment. I said it once, I’ll say it forever, don’t worry bebe, another guy like ‘Ameeellooo’ could never make me crazy like you do. ” 

[commajade]

Album ranking: Changmin's Chocolate EP, since you asked for it lol

THANK YOUUUUUUUUUUUU.

changmin is an exceptional pop artist and this is an exceptional debut. every single part of this album is carefully planned and like very well made. there’s a quality that seasoned idols have when it comes to music like boa has it shinee has it tvxq has it where they don’t do too much and just make extremely smart decisions, there’s not a flaw in this album even if some of it isn’t my taste. this album is 100% changmin it’s completely made with him in mind i haven’t looked into how involved he was in making it (i think he wrote a couple tracks?) but it’s just perfectly suited for him. i feel like where yunho’s solo career has been kind of marked by going all out while changmin’s is marked by tasteful restraint? which would be fitting of them. none of the songs on this album are doing too much, they’re all exactly well measured and well made. all skill all technique all experience. also it’s all so damn sexy. so much innuendo. So much innuendo. 

1. chocolate - perfect in every way. it’s so distilled changmin. i literally put on this song as soon as i wake up regularly just to get out of bed. it’s so sexy. it’s soooooo sexy. y’know what i’m gonna walk through this song moment by moment just to show u what i mean by PERFECTION. it’s just so smartly made. 

it opens with un deux trois quatre which is so sexy but it doesn’t let you get comfortable, it goes straight into AAAAIIIIIIII AIN’T SCARED OF ELECTRICITAAAAAY. so it’s okay you shock me. like what a killer line on top of that simple snapping sound and repeating brass it’s a HOOK. like it DRAGS you in and it just shows exactly what changmin is about from the jump. 

the little “oh yeah!” and “shock!” vocal tracks layered over is soo skillfully done and the bass intensifies on top of that same brass hook until the me in “you shock me” repeats and the brass drops out and it goes straight into another AMAZING beat with that “god is it bad?” transition with those interesting sounds like KILLER!!! FANTASTIC!!! 

and then the way the whole song shows off every single part of his voice there’s the opening big full chested high notes he’s famous for and then the verses are his smooth talking low whisper voice over that bass heavy beat. the layered harmonies. and then the shift in vocal technique for like the lines that end in lipstick and secret and savage and package he’s like in a completely diff placement even tho it’s the same range of notes and it’s Extra Sexy and he’s so showing off. and then back into the full chest high notes! and the choice of having a subdued chorus with an unexpectedly small drop like it’s such a smart choice you can’t have a big bombastic chorus when the rest of the song is built so carefully it really shows control and restraint in production every detail is just perfect and slightly experimental pop. 

and then his HIIIIGH NOOOOOTES god he’s just showing off with this song he’s completely at ease and in his element this song is tailor made for him and it fits soooo well it’s just so much pleasure. and it ends so abruptly u just wanna dive into it again it’s just exuding confidence and competence it’s just wonderful. 

2. piano - so good so good so good. i’m really grateful amasat had it as a question because otherwise it would’ve taken me longer to figure out how cool the lyrics are. he uses some really specific words to continue the piano metaphor and makes it sounds so good like repeat sign semitone musical motif melody chord harmony. and comparing her to the black and white keys of the piano. and “when you play on my piano” and how he goes do re mi sol la si do silence and then the song ends. so smart and bookending with how he starts it with la la la la lady like the music note but also how he’s comparing his lover to music. the lyric writer for this had a great time because he knew that changmin can make any crazy niche words sound good. 

there’s one moment where the lyric is “creating harmony in discordance” but  the music theory word for harmony sounds like the word for knees. so the actual lyric is “creating harmony between discordant notes” but is sounds like “creating harmony between your knees”. so much innuendo. the little “uh!” and “woo!” he does is so tasteful. he does sexy so tastefully i’m literally so admiring of him. also the bridge with “i like it when you say don’t stop” is just. so good. also the pun of pieonah (bloom) and piano. and like his vocals are so good it makes you pay attention to all the weird sounds and cool wordplay going on when the actual instrumental is pretty simple it’s a brilliant song. 

3. high heels - god this song is amazing. it’s such a funky michael jackson style track and again shows off his vocals with relatively subdued production and instrumentation. full band real instruments gorgeous. the heel clacking sounds are so fun the bass is amazing the vocal layering is gorgeous the melody is great. the lyrics are so smart. it’s just smoooooth. changmin is just such a sexy rnb vocalist i’m so glad he gave us an rnb album it’s beautiful. 

4. me myself and i - such a good easy listening smooth cafe or studying track. the opening line “i’m so freaking over you” is such a good hook. his voice is so soft and lovely. lo fi rnb changmin is a good changmin. it’s a simple song made masterfully and the guitar is lovely. i love the moment when the guitar stops and it’s super minimalist but with a moment of suspense before it comes back in. 

5. lie - took a little warming up to despite how much i love both changmin and chungha but it is quite a good song. it’s such american pop. like late night drive down the pch. the chorus is catchy tho “you’re a little i’m a little lonely” is good and the way chungha’s voice is added is really smart. chungha’s verse is like really surprisingly vulnerable on this track i was surprised and it was really grounding for the song overall. i wanna see chungha and changmin dancing together it would be so incredibly sexy. 

6. no tomorrow - this is the kind of white person indie pop i briefly listened to in 2013 and have not been able to stand ever since but because it’s changmin it’s listenable. it’s a fun roadtrip song! if i was looking out the window of a car winding through some mountain path i would be having a great time but for my quarantine music life it’s a skip. 

[perfectlymarilynmonroe]

I just saw a tiktok talking about how Marilyn had relationships with women, they mentioned Joan Crawford and Elizabeth Taylor and her acting coach, and that her therapist revealed that to the public. They even said Joe confirmed it saying that that was the reason their marriage didnt work out. I have never heard or read that before but everyone just took it as facts in those comments, could you clear it up?

Nope. All of the rumors of her dating woman have never been proven, and Joe never confirmed it. I’m really not sure where the rumors originated from, but biographers and sites continue to spread the myth.

There definitely hasn’t been anything to prove an affair with Elizabeth Taylor, as for Joan Crawford, Biographer Fred Lawrence Guiles wrote that she invited Marilyn back to her home and made a pass at her:

“Marilyn was more than ready for an affair with someone she could also admire. Her emotional life was far more complex than the public could even imagine. No sooner had she extricated herself from her entanglement with Natasha than she became involved in a serious friendship with Joan Crawford. Although Crawford’s career was again in decline, she was still a social presence of considerable importance in Hollywood. She had initiated the relationship by phoning Marilyn at the studio and inviting her to her home for Sunday brunch. Marilyn was thrilled to be taken up by one of her early idols and began dropping by Crawford’s home frequently. They found that they had a mutual interest in Christian Science. The aging film queen began to give her advice on how to dress and even offered her part of her own wardrobe, but since Crawford was petite and Marilyn was five foot six, nothing would fit. Just before Marilyn’s first date with DiMaggio, at another brunch and with the hostess slightly drunk, Crawford made a sexual pass at Marilyn and the friendship abruptly ended. Marilyn, who saw nothing wrong with lesbianism, recoiled more from shock than offense. Marilyn had a strong self-protective instinct and she must have sensed that any intimate involvement with Crawford would lead to big trouble down the road. Although she turned Crawford down, she determined to be discreet about what had happened. Within the next year and a half, her loyalty to the woman would be severely tested.”

In “My Story” Marilyn’s ghosted autobiography here is the chapter entitled: “My Joan Crawford Feud”

I met Joan Crawford at Joe Schenck's house. She was an impressive woman. I admired her during dinner. I hoped that when I was her age I would keep my looks as well as she had. Some movie stars don't seem like stars when you meet them, and some seem more like stars off the screen than on. I don't know which is better, but Miss Crawford was definitely the latter type. She was as much the movie star at Mr. Schenck's dinner table as she could have been electrifying a courtroom in a movie drama-even a little more. I was pleased to see I had made an impression on Miss Crawford. She said to me after dinner, "I think I could help you a great deal if you would let me. For instance that white knitted dress you're wearing is utterly incorrect for a dinner of this kind." It was the only good dress I owned. I wore it evenings as well as daytimes when I was going any place important, and I cleaned it myself every day. I looked at Miss Crawford's beautiful evening gown and understood what she meant. "Taste," Miss Crawford went on, "is every bit as important as looks and figure." She smiled very kindly at me and asked, "Will you let me help you, my dear?" I said I was flattered to have her offer to. We made a date to meet Sunday morning in church. It turned out that Miss Crawford and I went to the same church. After the church service, Miss Crawford said as we met coming out, "I'm so glad to see you. But you mustn't come to church in flat heels and a gray suit with black trimming. If you wear gray you must wear different gray tones, but never black." It was my only suit, but there was no sense defending it on that ground. "Would you like to come to my house with me?" Miss Crawford asked. I said I'd like to very much, and it was arranged that I should follow her car in mine. I was excited at what I thought was going to happen. Miss Crawford, I felt pretty sure, was going to offer me some of her old ball gowns and ensembles that she'd grown tired of. The house was very beautiful and elegant. We had lunch in the kitchen with Miss Crawford's four children and a beautiful white poodle. After lunch, Miss Crawford asked me to come upstairs to her room. "Brown would look very good on you," she said. "I must show you the things I've been knitting." She showed me a number of knitted dickies in different shades of brown and explained that they were to be worn under different shades of brown suits. "The main thing about dressing well," Miss Crawford explained, "is to see that everything you wear is just right- your shoes, stockings, gloves and bag all fit the suit you're wearing. Now what I would like you to do is to make a list of all the clothes in your wardrobe, and I'll make a list of all the things you need to buy and see that you buy the right things." I didn't say anything. I usually didn't mind telling people I was broke and even trying to borrow a few dollars from them to tide me over. But for some reason I couldn't tell Miss Crawford that she had seen my wardrobe in full-the incorrect white knitted dress and the wrong gray suit. "It's so easy not to look vulgar," Miss Crawford assured me, when I was ready to leave. "Do make out a list of all your things and let me guide you a bit. You'll be surprised at the results. And so will everyone else." I don't know why I called Miss Crawford up again, except that I had promised I would. Maybe I was still hoping she would present me with some of her discarded ball gowns. I think, also, I had some intention of telling her the truth about not being able to buy any fancy clothes. But when I heard Miss Crawford's voice on the phone, I had to start palavering as I'd done before. Had I made out that list of my wardrobe? No, I hadn't. That was very lazy of me. Yes, I knew. And I would make the list out in a few days and call her up again. "Good," said Miss Crawford. "I'll be expecting to hear from you." I didn't call Miss Crawford again. In fact, the next time I heard from Miss Crawford was in the newspapers. This was a year later. I'd gone to work at both Century-Fox again, and the Marilyn Monroe boom had started. I was all over the magazines and movie columns, and the fan mail at the studio was arriving in trucks. Among the honors that were now showering on me was the privilege of presenting one of the Oscars to one of the Award winners at the Academy's annual affair. I was frozen with fear the night of the Academy Award Ceremonies. I waited tremblingly for my turn to walk up to the platform and hand over the Oscar in my keeping. I prayed I wouldn't trip and fall and that my voice wouldn't disappear when I had to say my two lines. When my turn came I managed to reach the platform, say my piece, and return to my table without any mishap. Or so I thought until I read Joan Crawford's remarks in the morning papers. I haven't saved the clippings, but I have sort of remembered what she said. She said that Marilyn Monroe's vulgar performance at the Academy affair was a disgrace to all of I Hollywood. The vulgarity, she said, consisted of my wearing a dress too tight for me and wriggling my rear when I walked upholding one of the holy Oscars in my hand. I was so surprised I could hardly believe what I was reading. I called up some friends who had seen me at the ceremony and asked them if it were true. They laughed. It wasn't true, they said. They advised me to forgive a lady who had once been young and seductive herself. I have written out this accurate account of one of my "feuds" because it is typical. The feuds are all started by someone whom I have mysteriously offended-always always a woman. The truth is my tight dress and my wiggling were all in Miss Crawford's mind. She obviously had been reading too much about me. Or maybe she was just annoyed because I had never brought her a list of my wardrobe.

*From my FAQ about whether MY STORY is trustworthy:

My Story is based off of interviews that Ben Hecht conducted with Marilyn in late 1953 and early 1954 for an autobiographical work they were doing together. The project was nipped in the bud after Hecht’s assistant leaked the manuscript to a publisher in England. Marilyn lost faith in the project and the book sat away for decades after her death. It landed in the hands of the Greene family, and they published it in 1974 -  10 years after Hecht’s death. After much digging and consideration, I would not regard it as a factual autobiography. The loose information provided like her childhood, molestation, rise to stardom, relationship with Joe DiMaggio is factual, but I would not take the book word-for-word. It’s also incredibly disappointing that her name, Norma Jeane, is mis-spelled as “Norma Jean.” Marilyn’s niece, confirms this on her website as well:

MYTH: Marilyn wrote an autobiography entitled MY STORY.

FACT: No so. Ben Hecht, a Hollywood writer, concocted a half-baked manuscript based on conversations with Marilyn. The manuscript remained unpublished long after Marilyn’s death. Marilyn’s former business partner Milton Greene had it in his possession. — http://www.monaraemiracle.com/disc.html⁣⁣

In the short version, the story is a myth without factual evidence. Furthermore, there is no proof that Marilyn ever engaged in sex with a woman.

From Marilyn herself:

“A man who had kissed me once had said it was very possible I was a lesbian because I apparently had no response to males-meaning him. I didn't contradict him because I didn't know what I was. There were times even when I didn't feel human and times when all I could think of was dying. There was also the sinister fact that a well-made woman had always thrilled me to look at. Now, having fallen in love, I knew what I was. It wasn't a lesbian.” —My Story, ghost autobiography

Marilyn, however, was very supportive of gay rights, in 1960 she told W.J. Weatherby, (about Montgomery Clift): “People who aren’t fit to open the door for him sneer at his homosexuality. What do they know about it? Labels – people love putting labels on each other. Then they feel safe. People tried to make me into a lesbian. I laughed. No sex is wrong if there’s love in it.”

Following the 1953 Photoplay awards Joan Crawford made nasty comments about Marilyn to the press for her dress choice:

“Certainly her picture isn't doing business, and I'll tell you why. Sex plays a tremendously important part in every person's life. People are interested in it, intrigued with it. But they don't like to see it flaunted in their faces. Kids don't like her. Sex plays a growingly important part in their lives, too; and they don't like to see it exploited. And don't forget the women. They're the ones who pick out the movie entertainment for the family. They won't pick anything that won't be suitable for their husbands and children. The publicity has gone too far, and apparently, Miss Monroe is making the mistake of believing her publicity... She should be told that the public likes provocative feminine personalities; but it also likes to know that underneath it all the actresses are ladies.”

Marilyn’s reaction was:

"I cried all night. I've always admired Miss Crawford for being such a wonderful mother--for taking four children and giving them a fine home. Who better than I to know what that means to homeless little ones?" 

[mssapphire]

Deconstructing Romantic Love, and what’s actually wrong with it (pt. 1) - Desire and Admiration =/= Love.

In our infinite quest for happiness, one pervasive question we tend to have is: what is love? (baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no mo’). And in this quest we have tried to find a million different answers and we have tried to deconstruct and understand what works and what makes it dysfunctional.

In the last century or so, we have tried to come up with alternatives to what we have identified as the root of all evil and female oppression: heteropatriarchal romantic love. And I say in the last century because Romanticism is a 19th c. thing - and to understand how it completely changed society and our relational dynamics, I’d suggest Alain de Botton (it’s a long video but 1) it’s worth it and 2) if you don’t have the time to read his book(s), it’s a great alternative).

This has given way to different forms of “Ethical Non-Monogamy”. I’ll eventually write a post abut the history around different Free Love movements - and how the term has definitely meant different things in different moments of time, and how we have now devoid it of any meaning, to the point we’re back in the clutches of patriarchy through rampant consumerism of bodies. But that’s a post for another day.

What I’d like to explore today is that the problem doesn’t rely in what relationship model you choose to follow (monogamy, polyamory, relationship anarchy, open relationships), but in the way we (mis)understand love. I recently wrote a post about the meaning of being emotionally responsible, making an emphasis on why it’s so difficult for cis straight men. And following that thread, I’d like to come to another crossroads we (but, again, specially cis straight men) seem to find ourselves on: confounding admiration and desire with love. Let’s break that down.

I could really, really go on a tangent here, but I’ll try to stay focused. We could trace back our culture’s confabulation of love, admiration and desire to Courtly Love. Courtly Love taught men that love but, most importantly, loving the right way, was something that could make you a better person, morally (and even socially) superior. The right way to love a Lady, who was the purest being incarnated on the face of the earth, was to admire her beauty which was no doubt a display of her own moral worth (yes, these are white beauty standards, where the most celebrated type of woman was blonde, pale as porcelain, and with blue or green eyes) - and yes, physical appearance being equated to moral worth was a thing in Medieval times (you can guess which are the good guys or the bad guys in a Medieval story only through their physical description). But here comes the plot twist about Courtly Love: you didn’t even had to have met the object of your desire to love her. So you have an entire tradition of poems being written by men to, for and about women they hadn’t even met. They had just heard about their reputation, and they completely made up a fantasy as to who the woman was - a woman they not only proclaimed to love, but also a woman whom they loved so much they could die for her.

This was fertile grounds for Petrarch’s poetry, now in the Renaissance, who took Courtly Love one step further: actually attaching the object of his desire to a real, living person (Laura). Fast forward to Romanticism and the idea of loving someone to the point it kills you, and that they’re the one and only object of your desire, and your “soul mate”, and thus complete and complement you in every single way has now become the trend as to how we perceive love.

But that all sounds very exotic and distant. What about the present? Certainly, you can’t compare these guys to the guys on tinder trying to hook up with anyone who’ll say yes. But allow me to say: 1) yes, yes I can and 2) it’s not only these guys - but even those who seem “more decent” and actually take you out on a date, and even date you for a while. Allow me to elaborate.

Again, I am going to go ahead and quote bell hooks’ definition of love (this is something I do, a lot): you have to distinguish love as a feeling vs love as a verb (we’ll circle back to this). When you understand love as a feeling, and as a feeling only, desire and admiration tend to feel a lot like love. And the problem lies therein society’s portrayal’s of love: “love at first sight”, passionate sex as the ultimate display of what love is and should be, blind admiration towards that person and how you have to stick through thick and thin until death do us part (does that ring a bell?).

“Seeing no wrong” with the object of our affection (or what we now call “missing red flags”) is something we do when we blindly admire someone. And, thus, that convinces us that real love, true love, is that in which you find no conflict, and where the other person is perfect and without flaw. The problem with confusing admiration and love is that, to admire someone, we have to put them up on a pedestal, so we can continue to admire them without our image of them crumbling. Think about all the times you lost respect for your idols as you found out who they really were, as a person, above and beyond their work.

The same happens with desire - which is something more visceral and raw. That person is desirable as long as they fit the fantasy we have about them - which relies to physical attributes, yes, but about things they do and don’t do. Even more so, sex is something that gives you the illusion of intimacy, because sex is inherently emotional and vulnerable (and the idea that it isn’t is capitalistic bullshit, but that’s a topic for another post).  So while you’re engaging in sex, you can enjoy all those endorphins and mushy feelings, without actually doing the hard work of actually getting to know the person for real. The moment the person displays a behavior or an attribute that clashes with the idea we have in our heads (maybe they’re too awkward, or they have bad breath in the morning), our fantasy, built on desire, starts to crumble.

Let me drive the point home with a personal example. An ex of mine was initially deeply attracted to me because of my intelligence (it was a good thing that he found me physically attractive too). He would be delighted when he saw me debate other people (and destroy them), to the point it immediately triggered physical affection. But as the relationship progressed and we found ourselves sharing and discussing personal views, his attitude started to shift. A quality that he usually admired me for, became something that made him feel contempt. “You’re so smart” turned into “you’re too smart” which eventually turned to “I can never talk to you because everything turns into a debate”. My attitude and approach hadn’t changed. What was happening is what always happens in an emotional relationship where you’re actually getting to know the person: I was falling off the pedestal he put me in. 

And, suddenly, I was seen not only as a human being with flaws and shortcomings, and far from perfect - but having to be so close and vulnerable in front of me was also deeply uncomfortable to him. Because when you’re really close to someone, that makes you reflect on yourself. True love and intimacy is an exercise of self reflection, which allows you to become acquainted with the best and worst sides of you. In my ex’s case, having to be confronted by the intelligence he admired so much initially, made him feel stupid and insecure.

Which leads me to another thing: in this confabulation of admiration/desire for love, men also get another short end of the stick. Because patriarchy has convinced them that a woman’s love lies in her admiration for him, the object of their desire (who has to instantly desire them back just because they want this person) has one job and one job only: to admire and support him unconditionally. This means that men are permanently stuck in a position where they have to display strength and bravado, as they fulfill the role of protectors and providers. And what happens then? you never truly get to know who they are inside. So any sort of criticism, disagreement or conflict is perceived as a threat - if you’re not admiring them, you’re personally attacking them, and you don’t really love them.

Again, the problem with all of this is that we still haven’t understood what love actually is. According to bell hook, love is also a verb. It’s the actions you take in order to nurture the relationship, so you both feel seen, known, heard and understood. It’s getting to know the other person deeply and honestly. It’s seeing ourselves reflected in their eyes and getting to know new depths about us that we hadn’t before.

Think about it in another way: if that person wasn’t physically attractive to you anymore, would you still love them? if that person presented flaws that you hate, would you still love them? If they didn’t have the same social status or job? if they didn’t engage in specific activities with you? and what would you be willing to do if those things change? these are all important questions to assess where your feelings for someone stand.

To be clear: you can love someone and admire them and desire them. But just because someone desires you or just because someone admires you, that doesn’t mean they love you. Again, love is in the work you do. And if you do your homework, you will find yourself admiring that person on deeper more significant attributes, like their compassion and patience and integrity, while you even learn to understand and appreciate their flaws in the context of who they really are - that’s what being understood means.

The problem is not monogamy. In fact, I find it more responsible and sustainable to understand just how much work goes into having healthy loving relationships and deciding to have that with one person, than being a hot ass mess and falling in and out of an unending string of relationships because we’re trying to score “woke points” by denying monogamy. Because if you think you’re defying monogamy while at the same time you’re following the same romantic standards to relate, then you’re not really subverting anything.

Next time you feel like you might feel love for someone, ask yourself if what you’re feeling means that you actually have the willingness to do the work required to be in a healthy relationship with them. If you find their presence in your life worth the effort or not. If this is a nourishing relationship, then the answer will probably be yes.

[konekoryuugamine]

Chaos Critic’s Top 10 Disliked Anime

Oh man I am going to get SO much flack for this one . . . I know, I know" so many anime are out there, and so many are like this, and yadda yadda - Look, I wanna do this, I wanna help people steer clear of these shows, and if someone likes these shows, more power to ya, but I don't like them, this is only opinion, and I prefer that no one calls me a liar or a jerk for saying something about an anime that is all speculation and varied per person. Anyways, I don't own these animes, and please read and enjoy, no flames, thanks a bunch.    Let me say this now: not all anime rock.    I have been an avid anime watcher since I was in the 5th grade, and when I realized anime were released every year, in the hundreds, I was flipping over in cartwheels. Vampires, dragons, wizards, ninjas, rock and roll - all of those in my favorite animation style that is pretty much SO flipping awesome in so many ways - made me so happy.    I ended up binging anime on Toonami, (still do), and joined several anime sites to get the latest anime dishes and series that I could muster up enough free time to watch. My parents grew concerned about me watching so much of it to the point where I would have been addicted, but then I ended up telling them it was where my heart laid, and they accepted, it with somewhat unwilling protectiveness.        After all these years of watching anime and reading manga, I ended up developing tastes that ranged from very horroreqsue anime with suspense and mystery to ridiculous comedy with great puns on words.    'Bakemonogatari', everyone.

   However, with these tastes and genres came some of the weird and strangest animes I have ever seen, and am currently watching. Does this mean I think all 'weird' anime are bad? Heck no - 'Bobobo-Bobobobo', "Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt" and "FLCL" are some of my favorites, although I consider Bobobo a guilty pleasure.    I did run into some strange and bad anime, however, and it made me wonder whether or not getting into anime at all was a good or bad idea. It even made me think that these were the animes that gave other great ones bad wraps - hence the stereotype of Japanese anime always being about ten-year-old girls and tentacles.    No idea why, honestly.    The more I do think about it, however, I do feel there are some pretty bad anime out there on the internet, and if you ask any anime fan, they will list some anime that are bad, their favorites, and even one they watch when they choose to. Many a conversation I had often resulted in me talking about the ones I liked more than the ones I hated, to my relief.    But otherwise, I feel these anime I'm about to list carry their ideas a bit too far, go too far with anime as a format, or are just overhyped and bad as heck . . . just because an anime is weird, strange, badly dubbed or whatever else does not mean I have to hate it.    I have my reasons.    So, without fault, here's my top ten anime I dislike more than others. Keep in mind that these are the anime I dislike for certain reasons, and if someone out there does like these, and calls me out for hating them, then I accept it. Just because I hate something doesn't mean you can make me like it.

   And here they are. NUMBER 10: " Lil' Pri"        I thought this series would be cute to watch for a while, and I decided to watch a few episodes. I ended up binging the whole series and started thinking too much about it.    Then I realized it wasn't really that good.    Ringo Yukimori, a young girl who enjoys Snow White's stories, literally bumps into two other girls at a concert for a super famous singer named Wish. The other girls, Leila Takashiro and Natsuki Sasahara, also enjoy the stories of Princess Kaguya and Cinderella. The suddenly then run into three adorable talking animals, Sei, Dai and Ryoku, (a bird, a squirrel and a dragon), who are looking for their princesses in the human world.    The main idea behind this series is that the three girls turn into older versions of themselves with the embedded spirits of Snow White, Cinderella, and Princess Kaguya to help bring human happiness, "happiness tones", to Fairyland and save it. Humans' happiness and believe in the fairytales has dwindled, decreasing the happiness tones. So, the girls agree to help retrieve those, and along the way, they figure out Wish is the Queen's 'long-lost' son, who can turn into a rabbit . . .    Yeah see where I'm going here?    The anime is, for all intents and purposes, as straightforward as a magical girl series can get. There are no hidden meanings to Ringo, Leila or Natsuki, and their names pretty much are dead giveaways to what stories they enjoy most. Prince Chris, a.k.a. Wish, is immediately given focus at the beginning of the series, and there are no real surprises until the last few episodes of the series when the girls give up their magic, hint-hint, and leave Fairyland after retrieving all the happiness tones.    Let me tell you, that can get kind of boring . . .    The main problem I have with this series overall is how bland it is and how it seems to take ideas from several other little girls' magical shows, such as Ojamajo Do-re-mi or Pretty Cure. The concepts of having normal girls become heroes to save other lands, rescue royalty and adapt to their situation are something I've heard before and seen more excellently done, in other shows. The fact the girls also become idols onstage is an interesting quirk, but it reminds me too much of the Witchlings' maid outfit changes from the fourth season of Ojamajo. 

   It doesn’t help the CGI in the anime comes off as awkward, leaving the concert scenes clunky and hard to watch. Their movements are stiff, and their voices are not exactly the best. They do get better in vocals as the series progresses, but everything else stays the same.    When I also state how bland the series is, I'm also referring to Ringo, Leila, and Natsuki, reluctantly. The audience is told and can understand the heroines well enough to the point where we wish they had more depth. They all love Wish, they love fairytales, Ringo loves apples and has seven brothers, Leila is half Italian, Natsuki loves sports - we get it.    The problem is that they have no other depth than being cardboard cutouts of anime heroines.    We are never given any character conflicts, they never have issues that expand over the series, they never really get the kind of development other series like Sailor Moon receive for magical girl heroines. I know I may get flack for mentioning that, but I have seen development of Usagi Tsukino in both the manga and the new anime adaption of the series. The girls don't really receive any development here, aside from the minor mentioning of growing up and accepting happiness as it comes rather than forcing it on others.    The reason this one ranks so low on my list is because I do still enjoy the cuter designs of the characters, and give it points for trying to come up with a good driving plot that does bring to mind the idea of growing up and being happy. It’s a cookie cutter style idol show but it has heart to it. It tries to overstep its bounds, but never gets the chance to.     At the same time, I also think Show By Rock!! and Zombieland Saga did the “idol concept with a twist” take much better, what with one being a Sanrio based product that combines an isekai with an idol show, and an idol show about zombie girls that satirizes the entire idol industry.  NUMBER 9: " Full Metal Alchemist"    I am going to get SO much flack for this one . . .   Before someone eats my liver, let me say I love the series as a whole, but compared to Brotherhood, this series has become something that both baffles me and makes me confused.    The series revolves around Edward and Alphonse Elric, who try to bring their mother back from the dead using the practice of alchemy. Strictly taboo, and stricken with grief, they decide to bring her back and return to their happiness. However, something goes horribly wrong and Alphonse's body is taken as compensation for their mother, who doesn't truly return. Ed sacrifices his arm and leg to save his brother and bring him back in a suit of armor. After the incident, in the anime, Ed decides to join the military of Risembool and hunt down the Philosopher's Stone, which is implied heavily to be something that can work real miracles.    I enjoyed watching the series, and I empathized with both Edward and Alphonse. They lost everything, tried to get it back, and lost more in return. Their tackling of the philosophy of equivalent exchange and getting something for nothing is truly moving, and the deep symbolization of The Philosopher's Stone being hope and realization is something that I know I will never see duplication of.    Then . . . I saw the ending episodes of the first series.    And I got mad.    I expected an epic climax, much like what happened in "Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood". I wanted Ed to get his limbs back, Al to get his body back, Ed to marry Winrey, Hoenheim to die and accept his flaws, for the Philosopher stone to dissolve, and for Scar to repent himself . . .    Instead, we got something that felt rushed, confusing and strange to me. Something that throws the entire series out of whack because of it.    The leader of the Homunculi, who had been chasing Ed and Al all over the place until they reached Liore again, were being led by Dante. The old lady who taught Izumi, their teacher. The old lady who was killed by Greed in episode 33. Who had an assistant who had that strange alchemic tablet.    Dante, as it turns out, was a lover of Hoenheim, much to everyone's shock, and when Hoenheim and she gave up their souls for the stone, they created something that they could use to swap their bodies and minds, intelligence included, into other beings, sort of like the plot of "Quantum Leap" without the randomness and depth. She was jilted because Hoenheim left her, (reasonably succumbing to his guilt over killing so many people to make the stone), and she decided to make and use the Homunculi to chase down HIS sons and make a new stone.    In other words, she ended up wanting to make another stone, and her real motives for why are never explained, although her anger over Hoenheim leaving her for another woman, then using HIS KIDS to make a new stone, is petty in terms of evil levels. She toyed with the Elrics, taunted them throughout the series, and ended up controlling things to make a new Philosopher's stone.    That part, however, is hard for me to buy.    Dante being the villain behind everything, including the making of the second Philosopher's stone, and bringing back Rose for no other reason than to use her as a 'figurehead' then possess her, is hard for me to take in. This would mean she'd have to have tabs on the Elrics at all times, be involved in the Risembool military, use more than one person at one point or another, display that she knew about the war and probably was the one who started it in the first place.    There were no indications to me that Dante was the villain all along through the series, as the Homunculi were given more screen time than her, her assistant and later body double Lyra was shown twice and was bland as other minor characters, and things don't connect well for me to buy it logically.    If she was the one behind everything, and she was supposed to have been fake-killed by Greed, then when did she successfully possess Lyra? How long has she kept tabs on the Elrics? Was she involved somehow in Trisha's illness, that kickstarted the entire flipping hunt for the Philosopher's Stone? If she was also involved, why drag Rose into the battle to just tick off Edward?    And furthermore, if Hoenheim knew if she was behind everything, and knew he'd be killed otherwise, then why didn't he just come right out and explain everything to the brothers when they first got involved with the Homunculi? Was he just afraid of dying? Of killing others?

   The more confusing thing is how this ending was created. Anime depends on the manga in most cases to flesh out the story. If the manga is over several volumes, like One Piece or Bleach, episodes will be released and designated in arcs and storylines. If the manga is ahead of the anime, then the writing process for the episodes can be ad-libbed thanks to the story that’s already present.

   When the manga halts or goes on hiatus, the anime must do something to fill in the extra space while the mangaka continues their work. Hence “filler arcs”. Like the extra few filler arcs in Bleach that involve the new captain or the Bounts, or the filler arcs in Naruto that everyone wishes didn’t exist. They exist to not only extend the anime’s lifespan but to try and flesh out the worlds of these series to make them feel more alive. 

   In this case, this was a filler ending for the Full Metal Alchemist anime series. The manga had gone on hiatus and they had nothing to conclude the show with, so they had to deal with what they had. I wanted to like it, but after looking at everything, I just find that nothing fits.    Either way, the ending of the original anime just befuddled me with an antagonist who was barely connected to the story to me, and the threads that bound her fingers to her puppets were about as thin as fishing line to me.      . . . Not to mention I'm still wondering how the anime connected itself to the 'parallel-world' of 'Germany' and how Edward was stuck there through the movie "Conqueror of Shamballa", but that movie did try to tie up the original anime series with a bow.

   Of course, this leads me to say why I dislike it so much: because Full Metal  Alchemist: Brotherhood exists. It’s an amendment to the series that aims to follow every detail of the manga. We see more progressive action and character development from start to finish, and we see an expansive world that was never given to us in the original anime. Fans of the show were rewarded with Ed and Al getting what they wished for, intense and awesome animation, and a marriage proposal that is adorable no matter which way you put it.

   However, I will say the first 10 to 13 episodes of the original anime are far better introductory episodes than the first few episodes of Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood. We see the Elrics grow and reach their respective early goals quick, and we actually get to know Alexander and Nina before Shou Tucker fucks things up. We also get deeper motivation for Ed’s reasons to become a State Alchemist. 

   If I did have to recommend this series to people who’d never seen it, I’d say go watch the first 10 episodes of the first FMA series, then watch Brotherhood in its entirety. Get the context and emotional development first, then come back in for what else is in store.    And now I'm gonna put on this football helmet while I wait for the hate mail. NUMBER 8: " Ghost Hound"    This one is a special case of bad to me.    There was a point where I got hooked on the anime "Serial Experiments Lain" and I got into the idea that many anime were deeper than they seemed. Lain was a dimensional protagonist who I felt much in common with, and developed a sense of what I wanted to know about ESP. I decided to get into shows involving the subject, and later developed a taste in supernatural shows and law dramas. Or anything that often touted lighter themes of horror.    I found this anime on accident one day when I was looking up scary anime. And after finding out it was done by Production I.G. and Shirow Masamune, I was ecstatic.     I was disappointed when I watched it.    The entire story revolves around a boy named Taro, who was kidnapped with his younger sister Mizuka on September 22nd, 1996. His sister died, but he survived the horrific situation. Since then, he's been seeing a therapist and has horrible PTSD-induced nightmares involving the situation. He also develops the ability to astral project himself into The Unseen World, which is the space between the living and the dead, and he uses his ability to better himself and his friends Makoto and Masayuki, who have also suffered similar traumatic childhood situations. They are led on this journey by their psychologist, who has his own agenda on the matter, but wants to help solve the supernatural insanity in the boys’ lives due to his own interactions with The Unseen World.     On its own, this idea is rather interesting, and you feel it can be done well over the course of 13 episodes, with an added OVA of how the entire conflict is resolved with death being a part of life, how having a power means it comes with greater responsibility and how everyone has issues they must come to terms with. And in the case of Masamune’s anime, delve deeper into the human understanding and structure of the conscious and unconscious mind.    However, the anime takes a rather . . . interesting, turn in its story. And when I say interesting, I mean something that may or may not work, depending on who you ask.    When the boys get together and go after the one who kidnapped Taro and his sister, they come across Miyako Komagusu, who has spiritual powers thanks to her miko line. She chooses to help them and Taro soon becomes fixated on Miyako due to her appearance, which is eerily similar to his sister. 

   Soon, the whole kidnapping element is thrown out the window, same with the title of the anime being only Makoto's astral-projection form, and comes in with a religious sect underneath Makoto's family and the fact his grandmother tries to make Miyako the new head after her father is hospitalized.    And it's later revealed that the Ogami Religious Cult has ties to an underground group of illegal drugs, medical enhancements, MUTANTS, and child kidnappings . . .    At this point, I was saying "why?"    On the one hand, it's a dark turn for an anime that started out with ESP, traumatic incidents, and they do save Miyako from the group of psychos. Whether or not the group remained standing was unclear to me, and the more I thought about how deep this went, the further I ended up in mental spirals of how logic had to be invoked.    On the other hand, it's a mish-mash of every cliche involving some evil mastermind group I can think of: the bad guy actually did this to such and such, who became the main guy's best friend, and now they want the girl who the main character has a connection with, and they all have supernatural powers, and they get others who betrayed the bad guys to help them.    This overlay of genres, and the fact the ESP is forgotten at about halfway through the anime for my liking, (along with there not even being MUCH of the supposed 'ghost hound'), there is also a stunning issue I had with the design of the characters not fitting the backgrounds. Whereas the designs were simple, the backgrounds were overly lush, too detailed, too mesmerizing.    Not like in "Over the Garden Wall", but still.    All in all, 'Ghost Hound' is a mixed bag to me. It does provide some good food for thought and an interesting storyline, but the second half ruins the story and eliminates the ESP the story was embedded into. NUMBER 7: " School Days"    I am aware this will be on others' hate lists, but hear me out . . . yeah, it's that bad in the anime form.    "School Days" is based on a visual novel game of the same name by Overflow, and has quickly garnered a reputation. The series involves this character, Makoto, as he makes his way into high school and develops a crush on adorable and shy Kotonoha. At the same time, depending on which way the player goes, he'll also fall for his best friend, his best friend's cousin, the other girls IN his class - well, you get where I'm going with this.    But before I get to the anime, let me explain a bit more about the game itself.    It incorporated motion and sound into the visual touch, making it look like you were playing an interactive anime, which wasn't that bad of an idea. There were also numerous cut scenes, (including graphic content might I add), that depicted the characters, and something that made the series very popular online: the death scenes.    What made this game unique from others is that it included graphic and detailed executions of main characters in several gorey fashions, along with some of the worst bad ends that can ever be imagined when it comes to one main character screwing over someone else. One death scene in particular involved Kotonoha committing suicide from a tall building in front of Makoto and Sekai, and you can HEAR THE CRUNK AND BUBBLE OF HER BODY AS SHE HITS THE PAVEMENT.    THAT ALONE TELLS YOU WHAT IS AT STAKE IN THIS GAME IF YOU SCREW UP.    But, because of how varied the main character's answers can get, and how many cut scenes are available at the time of the first go-around, someone will have to play the game multiple times before a Good ending is unlocked, like the super-rare harem-esque relationship between Makoto, Satonaka and Kotonoha. (Apparently, it's impossible to get because of how many things you can say, but I digress).    Now, to explain how the game became an anime . . . and I really don't want to . . .    The anime adapts the storyline of the game, following Makoto in high school, and he tries to get Kotonoha to fall for him, and Sekai tries to help him, then she falls for him. In short, it's a typical anime that depicts a three-way love triangle.    Until about the fourth or fifth episode.    After he gets Kotonoha as a girlfriend, he dates Sekai, with the knowledge of everyone, and LIES about breaking up with Kotonoha, AND HAS SEX WITH SEKAI, for the purpose of making things better with Kotonoha. He then goes around and sleeps with OTHER GIRLS IN HIS CLASS and AVOIDS KOTONOHA to keep up this whole thing.    That is called "sleeping around" and "being a jerk".    The reasons why people list this anime on their worst list is mostly because of the annoying voices, or because of the stilted and bland colors in the background, but to me and numerous others, it's because of Makoto Ito being a two-timing jerk who also has sex with numerous girls while still having one intimate girlfriend.    No, what also cements it for me, are the last three episodes: Sekai announces she's pregnant to the class, Makoto is reasonably cut off from his friends, Kotonoha, who had been RAPED, is devastated, and Makoto blames Sekai for ruining his life when he was JUST as much at fault in the first place. He goes out with Kotonoha, and right as he gets home, Sekai, reasonably ticked off, stabs him brutally with a butcher knife, and Kotonoha kills her and affirms she was lying about her pregnancy, then takes Makoto's head and sails off.    This was about the only way I could have expected this entire mess to conclude. Someone had to die, Makoto had to be given his karmic payback for sleeping with so many women, and for cheating and leaving Kotonoha to be raped and blaming Sekai for everything when he had his own faults, and Kotonoha had to take revenge or grow a backbone because of how everything bad happened to her for some reason.    In other words, the conclusion is more satisfying to me than the show itself, and that actually saved it a few places on my list. Watching it from start to finish is terrible, and the way you know about Makoto's sleeping around makes you want to slap some sense into him.    Or stab him with a knife, but I digress. NUMBER 6: " Bludgeoning Angel Dokuro-Chan"    AND now we get to something that's both bad and comedic.    And for once I'm not talking about Spongebob.    "Bludgeoning Angel Dokuro-Chan" is an anime that combines hentai and comedy, and as for the brand of humor, it relies on what is known as the continuous running gag. To understand what I mean, let me give you a few examples of continuous anime running gags: Team Rocket blasting off in every episode of "Pokemon" and doing some kind of farfetched scheme to capture Pikachu, how Joey Wheeler is also denoted as being immature or a punk, and as of more recent anime I've seen, how Tsukune is subjected to being fought over by Moka and the other girls.    The reason I'm bringing this up is that these are the gags I've seen being used in shows that quickly got stale . . . and were still being used as the show went along. 'Pokemon' is still the biggest offender of this since Pokemon Co. got a hold of the dubbing and anime creations in both Japan and America. The gag of Team Rocket blasting off is okay for a season or so, but seeing them just get pounded again and again makes me feel sorry for them, and makes me want to slap them and say "Stop blowing yourselves up all the time!", thinking they'd learn.    But hey, I can dream can't I?        The issue with that is the issue with this anime completely.    "Bokotatsu-Tenshi Dokuro-Chan", or "Bludgeoning Angel Dokuro-Chan" is an anime that focuses on a boy named Sakura Kusanabe, who is a normal boy going to school and having a crush on his classmate. Apparently, 20 years into the future, he invents a machine that prevents the aging process on women after the age of 13, making them . . . physically younger.    They literally call this in the anime a "pedophile's dream world".    So, God, in the future, sends an angel, Dokuro, to go and assassinate him so he can't make this crazy machine . . . if you are laughing right now, I was too.    The plot is ridiculous, as par for how it's supposed to be a comedy, but the manner of ridiculous ends there and it becomes more mindbogglingly annoying with each passing episode. Dokuro, when she gets to Sakura, decides to live with him and convince him to not build the machine, and in the process, does so with her rambunctious energy, super-human strength, her annoying voice, and often times, KILLS HIM WITH HER KANABO CLUB CALLED EXCALIBOLT.    That is the gist of the entire show. He tries to impress a girl, he 'insults' the over-sensitive Dokuro, she kills him, she brings him back to life. He tries to make some friends, she gets offended, she kills him, she brings him back to life. And so on and so forth.    For about thirteen episodes.    I ended up watching the series with my younger sister when I was about 15, and I couldn't help but laugh ad how dumb it was. And because I knew I couldn't change the videos because of my younger sister saying "Show me more, show me more! I wanna see him die again!"    . . . I felt a part of my soul die. (I also learned never to show my sister that kind of anime again . . . until she watched "Attack on Titan"). so, Anyways!    The entire anime, dub or sub, is annoying, high pitched, and the characters are all flat as boards. Dokuro's entire character is her crush on Sakura and the fact she wants to help him while never learning she accidentally causes his deaths. Sakura is a perverted young boy who is trying to get by, and ends up falling for Dokuro in a stereotypical fashion. There's also other angel characters, such as one who uses a  . . . cattle prod, and she has ram horns . . . and one who is a  . . . transvestite punk goblin?    To be honest, I never bothered to remember their names because I forgot about them after another two episodes. Same with Dokuro's sister. The only reason I remember her was because the show made her look hot for a 7-year-old, and she used a wet towel as a weapon.    And everyone in the school thought she was hot.    . . . I'm gonna stop on this one now before I get angry again and say that this anime isn't very good, but it does do a good job in setting up something that is both hilarious in context and causing some of the better memes in AMV Hell 3. NUMBER 5: " Sonic X"    From contrived and humorous to awkward and strange.    I first watched this show, much like others, on the Fox Box, (among other anime that were terribly dubbed by 4Kids). It was . . . strange, to see a talking hedgehog with blue quills run about with a two-tailed yellow kitsune, and on Earth no less. I had to change the channel every few seconds or so because I felt so strange watching them. I ended up feeling the same thing when I was watching 'Sonic Underground'.    I know now that the feeling was 'awkwardness'.    The story follows Sonic and his friends from the planet Mobius as they get transported to Earth because of some unintended calculations from Sonic screwing with Dr. Eggman's machine. Because they don't how it happened, and they don't know how to go back, they have to adjust on Earth, and they do just that. In the process, Sonic befriends a human, Chris, whose father is a scientist.    And the wacky adventures are supposed to continue from there . . .    I'll go ahead and say this now: combining humans in a world of anthropomorphic animals has to either be done well or not at all. I'm cool with anthropomorphism being talking animals, like Bubbie from 'Flapjack', or like Fred the horse or Beatrice from 'Over the Garden Wall'. I also don't mind if they have only the humanistic approach, and cannot talk, like the animals from 'Wicked'.    But if it's full anthropomorphism, like Looney Tunes or Tom and Jerry, then it has to make sense as to why they are there and how they can fit in with the environment. It comes down to three basic things: environment, history and art style. If the environment is okay, and the history of there being anthropomorphism is established, and the art style is in turn okay, then it is okay in the long run.    This is why I enjoy "The Looney Tunes Show". The environment is more modern and bent to match reality, the history of the characters is established early on and build on episode by episode, (and there's the references that add to it with Looney Tunes jokes from previous shorts from the 60's), and there are confirmed humans in the show who don't notice the anthropomorphism, and the art style blends it all together in a clean swipe of hilarity and animation brilliance.    This is also why I enjoy the movie "Cats Don't Dance": it takes anthropomorphism of animals and turns it into a metaphor for racism in 1940's Hollywood. It combined a relative environment of a historical timepiece, added the necessary elements of anthropomorphism with its own rich metamorphic history and the art style made all of it look like it was a classic cartoon.    If the environment works, and the history is laid down, and the art style manages to work it together, then anthropomorphism in shows is alright and well done in my book. But, (and I do have to be honest when I say this), if even one of these is never touched on, or brought too much into focus, then questions will be raised and things can be turned awkward.    This is what I feel happened when I watched 'Sonic X'.    The environment was Earth and all humans, with no mentions of Sonic being real before, and then out of the blue Sonic and his friends fall to Earth, "like Magic". The art style made it harder for me to watch because of how cartoonish Sonic and his friends looked compared to the humans and Eggman. It also could have been because every line looked SO SMOOTH, and there were no detailed areas or specifics, but I could have been wrong.    To me, this series started off awkward, and continued to get more awkward with the introduction of Shadow, Eggman's schemes and the later part of season one. The conclusion of season one was, and I'll say it lightly, okay. Chris saying goodbye to Sonic and his friends at the expense of never seeing them again was heartfelt, and he did act reasonably when it came to seeing them leave.    (Although the CGI could have been better for their transition back).    THEN . . . season two happened . . . then season two happened . . .    Just like how I feel with "Sword Art Online", I feel season two of 'Sonic X' is weaker than the first. Chris coming back because he longed for Sonic all these years and building a machine to send him to Mobius, and he happens to turn into a kid again because of the time differences on planets?    Sure, I'll buy that, albeit it sounds like Sonic 06 to me.    And Cosmo being the key of life for an evil overlord, and later performs a sacrifice of herself to save everyone and Tails is left in the Friend Zone?    Cliche, painful to watch, predictable and overall weaker than the previous season.    I don't want to spend too much on this season either because the plot and Chris made it weaker than when we witnessed Sonic and his friends adapting to Earth and humanity. Introducing an annoying character again and adding a character who becomes the key for hope is something I feel has been done better before. I hate feeling this way because I watch "Sonic Boom" now, but I feel that one is better than this . . .    I hate to feel that way, but I do. NUMBER 4: " Eiken"    Stop me if you've heard this before: a new male student to a school, desperate to make friends, ends up tripping and falling, literally, for a busty babe who is perfect. Then he has to do something insane, meet her friends, and tries to hook up with her only to be shut down as lucky, a pervert or a complete loser.    If you answered me with "That's the opening plotline for Rosario+Vampire", then you're close. I also would have accepted "Stop talking, that sounds like every hentai anime out there", but fair enough.    This is also, word for word, the opening scenes of the OVA series "Eiken".    THIS one is BAD.    Originally an 18 volume manga series, "Eiken" involves a boy named Densuke Mifune, who transfers to Zashono Academy at the start of a new year. He accidentally gropes one of the school's most attractive girls, Chiharu Shinonome, and gets drafted into the Eiken Club, which is run by her friend, the lively and flirtatious Kirika Misono. He is then subjugated to being tortured by the club members while he tries to get Chiharu to like him.    . . . there is a catch to this one aside from being stereotypically harem/hentai anime.    "Eiken" has become infamous in the anime community for having female characters possess pronounced, er . . . "tracts of land".    Yeah, I said it.    The entire manga and two-episode OVA series follow hentai taken to ridiculous extremes, involving large boobs.    I don't know how the joke came about, or how people come to know about this, (probably in the same manner that people know about Boku no Pico), but dang it, I hate that I know about this one. The only reason this isn't my number one pick is that I found other clips on AMV Hell about it, and decided to check it out.    Now, I bet you're wondering: why would a straight-laced, highly intelligent young woman like myself watch a two-episode OVA involving girls with 'humorously' large breasts and a perverted boy who day-dreams of bondaging his crush in measuring tape?    I'll let Alucard get channeled here for that reason. Ally? (Alucard: Fuck you, that's how.)    Thanks, ya fuck-mothering vampire.    Aside from hitting all the earmarks of cliche and hentai moments in the book, the OVA adds to it by adding as much fanservice as physically and mentally possible, such as the bananas, the table dresses, the bondage day-dreams, etc. If someone wanted to make a hentai porn, those already exist. This is trying too hard to be something like porn without being it.    And kind of doing it poorly.    The games of the academy also are involved in some kind of rigging, which is contrived and makes no sense whatsoever, and Chiharu is involved with the bad guy, who is also cliche and makes no sense, and the entire resolution is easily predictable. It's dull, and only served to make me angry when I watched the OVA to see what the frick it was about.    I really do regret it.    I cannot stress how much hatred and pity I have for those who read this and actually enjoy it. If you do, more power to you; but just remember something.    THEY GAVE A 10-YEAR OLD BOOBS THE SIZE OF BASKETBALLS. NUMBER 3: " Black Butler II"    Before ANYONE says anything, YES I consider the second season of "Black Butler" to be another anime entirely.   Makes separating the two much easier.   For the record, nothing is wrong with "Black Butler". The series is wonderful, the pacing is perfect, the storylines between the manga and the show differ greatly, but either way the conclusions are perfect, the artstyle and metaphoric coloring is syched, the voicing acting is awesome - shall I go on?    So, when I finish the first season and see the second one, I decide to watch it.    I really, really, REALLY wish I hadn't.    The first season was, in all definitions of the words, "a work of art". The second season too it, and decimated every last loose end that was tied up in the first season finale.    Why am I being so hard on this series?    For a couple of reasons.    First of all, the plot.    The second series picks up with a new young blond gentleman, Alois Trancy, who has recently been found by his family after a kidnapping incident. Because of his trauma, he's become a bit of a jerk and often harms others. At his side is a handsome and elegant butler, Claude, who looks eerily closer to Sebastian than I can stand. They take the mansion over, and Alois goes about his merry way to be happy, albeit in the worst of ways, by torturing his female maid Hannah and the triplet servants.    If this is starting to sound like a warped Ciel Phantomhive to you, then you are feeling the exact same thing I felt when I first watched it. Of course, the first episode delves right into these two firsthand, how Alois is a bit of a prick, (the fact he wears booty shorts), and how he is not above hurting others to get what he wants. 

   Something I don't remember Ciel ever wanting to do or exhibit.    So, in episode one, a strange man with a large suitcase comes to the door and Alois lets him in. The man is later revealed to be Sebastian Michaelis, who was searching for something. In the suitcase is Ciel Phantomhive's soulless body, and Sebastian leaves the mansion with a tea box, holding a familiar blue ring. Alois is ticked, Claude is pissed and Ciel comes back from the dead.    The reason for this is pretty much left obvious for the viewers through flashbacks: in the first series finale, Sebastian was about to take Ciel's soul, when a contrived demon spider, Claude, swiped his delectable soul away from the raven demon. Sebastian, reasonably ticked off, went after him and gave him his soul back, but now Ciel's memories of the previous season are gone, he has lost his revenge sought, and doesn't remember how he helped to save London.    There's a reason I hate this anime.    Claude stealing Ciel's soul and him having amnesia are just more contrivances that serve nothing more than to force the plot of there being another demon-master team for Sebastian and Ciel to go up against. Rather than build up to something in the previous season, everything in this one is left readily explained, and it just hurts to see how everything goes swiftly to dog poop.     The second reason, the behavior of Claude and Alois Trancy. I've seen several worst anime character lists over the web, and Alois Trancy often dominates because of his smarmy attitude, his devastating contrasts to Ciel and how he harms others and begs to be saved by Claude at every instant notion of danger. 

   And, I can see why. Alois was, without a doubt, raised in a hellish environment, and all he had to look forward to was his 'brother', who is actually a saving grace for the anime and the blond. However, the severe deaths and mass village murders that took place because of his brother's pact with Hannah the Demon just wrecked everything for him.    If the writers wanted to make Alois more relatable, like Ciel, then more emotional touching could have been done. Instead, Alois is often shown not regretting his actions, causing trouble and damage at every beck and call, and like in one episode, begs for help from Claude. I can tell he's supposed to be a contrast to Ciel, but it's too far.    Especially when you count in how he also has three servants and Claude.    As for Claude, he's not off the hook either. His mannerisms are more unique than Sebastian, but aside from that, he's the same dandy as Sebastian. All he does differently is be more cold-hearted and go back on his bargain made with Sebastian in the second episode. And to explain that in further detail, he and Sebastian ended up making a blood pact using roses and their own blood to see who would get Ciel Phantomhive's soul: a who would win kind of scenario with a yaoi prize going to the winner. Claude was the one who suggested it, and he was the jerk who broke it. Sebastian even pointed this OUT, and still, Claude wanted Ciel's soul.    Not . . . to mention when Ciel and Alois' souls combined, he acted a bit . . . creepy around Ciel. (Dude kisses his leg . . . pedophilia there.)    Three, the introduction of Hannah and her role in the story. Hannah is literally the Deus-ex-machina in this story, and I will not lie when I say I genuinely believe it. The maid, Hannah, later in the episodes, is revealed to be a demoness, (whom Sebastian never noticed before, even when Clyde used her as a sword sheath), and was never brought into full use as a demoness and user of magic until the final three episodes. She is given a very cliche and bland personality at first, which gives way to how she was putting on a facade to get close to Alois, because she felt what his brother felt when he made the pact with her.    As much as I feel Hannah is a saving grace of the anime, I have to ding some points off because of how she exposites her role in Alois' past to him, in Ciel's body no less, and ends up performing a final act, that should not be possible, until she dies with Clyde and Alois. She could have been a better part of the story if she was given more of a stronger personality when Alois was being cruel, without going too sappy.    Not much else about her makes me want to hate her as much as hug her. She does has a reason to be near Alois, she does care about him unlike Clyde, and does win him over in the end. But in all cases, she was a little bit of a good thing in a large bad thing.    And as for the fourth reason, the flipping ending of the second series.    Oh . . . MY GOD . . .    Here's what happens as a recap, and stay with me here. 

   Ciel and Alois' souls are combined so he can be used by Claude as a last-ditch effort to win over Sebastian, and Sebastian gets reasonably ticked. Claude acts creepy, Ciel and Alois fight over Ciel's body and a maze is conjured that is fixed by Alois to let Claude win and take Ciel's soul away. Sebastian and Claude fight in the maze, Grell is there for no reason, Hannah is trying to talk to Alois who is in control, and Ciel's will takes over and changes the maze again. Alois finds out Claude lied and did want Ciel's soul, and Alois is ticked. The butlers complete the maze, and see Hannah over a passed out Ciel/Alois, and now with a new mark on him. The butlers are then escorted by Hannah to a demonic isle where they fight, and Alois' final contract with Hannah is revealed: he decided if Ciel's soul was so valuable, then he didn't want anyone to have or love it. So he wished that Ciel was a demon.    Ciel Phantomhive becomes a demon, and his last command to Sebastian before this happened was to follow his order and help him.    . . . The slap mark on my forehead is red.    Alois, being jealous of Ciel, wished him into a demonic being, and now Sebastian, who ended up with a happy ending in the first series, is now stuck with Ciel for all eternity. And as a bonus punishment, Ciel is immortal and has to retreat with Sebastian to the demon world and never return.    I was so angry when I watched this episode that I threw my phone across the room in a rage. Thank god for the Otterbox, or else it surely would have broken.    There are several problems I have here with this ending, one of the most obvious being how Hannah could get Alois to get another contract in when he was already in one with Clyde, and how Ciel's body could handle THREE contract pressures at once and not feel any kind of soul degeneration, or something by then. But no, the largest problem is how and why the writers turned Ciel into a demon.    The point of 'Black Butler" was to become associated with the concept of revenge and learn that it is not often what others are searching for. It's to be accepted that people will do bad things, and often get away with it. It doesn't mean taking revenge is the best option. While it is fulfilling, oftentimes it's not.    Here, the concept of revenge is taken to the extreme with Alois turning Ciel into a demon because he was jealous. There's nothing in the lines of retribution here, aside from the fact he sacrificed his life to save Ciel's and Sebastian's. All that he did he did for petty jealousy. Ciel never did anything wrong in this series, so it was as if Alois was the torturer and Ciel was the poor dude strung along on the wall. The revenge within this series was also manipulated and forced between Ciel and Alois, compared to how Ciel had to sleuth out who to kill in the first series.    Forced elements are never good. They always end badly.    And this series is just proof of it.    Having Hannah use her power to turn Ciel into a demon is also a stretch, as it is never implied she could do something like that before. I blame it more on the writers going "This is a good idea' and inserting it into the anime for kicks.    . . . or to create a 'hint-hint-yaoi-hint-hint' product to establish a new fanbase.    BUT, that just about sums up this one: contrived, bad characters, and ruining the first season of what made it good.    And now I will put on a helmet . . . because the second one is going to make SO many people angry at me . . . NUMBER 2: " Sword Art Online"        I can feel the fury from much hate-mail coming my direction, but let me explain my piece before someone goes all out and eats my liver.    I like sci-fi tech stories in anime. .Hack//Sign is one of my favorite anime, and it still stays as one of the better examples of video games in anime, next to "No Game No Life" and "Log Horizon". It takes gaming into another level and gives you a video game world you want to participate in, and characters you want to root for.    Yet this anime is where I draw the line when it comes to intense immersion. Aside from the stunning artwork and the stellar designs of the characters and worlds, I don't know much else I can commend about this anime, aside from the fact that it was also a fanfiction that became a thing.    (Remind you of anything?)    Now, back to what I was saying.        SAO follows a boy, Kazuto Kirigata, or as he goes in the game(s) "Kirito". In the first arc of the anime and stories, he gets stuck in a game called "Sword Art Online", along with about a thousand other players. The mastermind behind it, one of the creators of the game, got them stuck there, and to leave, the players have to reach level 100 of the entire game and defeat him. And they can’t be forcefully removed from the game system due to it being hooked to their nervous system.     Sure, it's a good idea, and sure I thought it was okay, but a part of me instantly disliked this idea because the same instance occurred in '.Hack//Sign', except the main character was the only one stuck in the game, it was psychological aspects with less action and the main character was a male avatar with a female body in the real world.    I just thought it was a rip-off of the series, and when I decided to watch the rest . . . I had to nope out.     About two to three episodes into the series, the players of SAO start to think the beta-testers for the game are beating everyone else easily because they know the mechanics and grinding points. So they try to force beta-testers to help them get information about the game and everything that entails it. And of course, no good comes from it because someone has to be the sacrificial lamb. This also spawns the term “beaters”, beta-testers who are ‘cheating’ in the game because of their foreknowledge.

   Kirito then gets the idea that since he was a beta-tester for the game, and knows the details of the game and knows everyone hates his ass now, he can beat the game himself. So, he gives a shortwinded diatribe about being “The Guy” and goes it alone. This is given the fact he also seems to have no motivational aspects for this, nor does he TRY to reach out to other members of the SAO player communities that are stuck in the game, but the other players treat him and other beta-testers of the game as jackwagons.    Beta-testers of games are beta-testers for a reason; they OK a game and game-play for little to no money, or much, and most of the time are good gamers.    And the nicest people. I should know; I know a dude who beta-tested Destiny.    Here, they're treated like jack-wagons, and Kirito just enforces the whole idea by acting like a jackwagon and walking away from other players to continue the game because why not.    Aside from that, Kirito's personality is one of disinterest and expressionless pity. He wants to get out, but he continues alone until he meets Asuna, who for all intents and purposes, is the BEST character in Part I. Their relationship is easily one of the better things in this anime, albeit ham-fisted and later turned to sludge in the second and third parts, but still.    Seeing them happy was a GOOD thing midway through this anime of darkness. It did give Kirito and Asuna something to fight for, but it never really fleshed either of them out for me. Skewer me later, I have a LOT more to point out.    AS the show progresses, the plot becomes more and more linear, it never forks, Asuna is later RAPED IN THE SECOND PART, IN GRAPHIC DETAIL, and Kirito's flat sister comes into play as well. My disinterest in the characters and hatred of the second villain of the anime was enough to make me switch to something else.    I'll be finishing this anime up for a full in-depth analysis later, but for now, I'll go ahead and say my piece here and leave it at that.    I know people like this anime, and it makes me happy to see they like something collectively. I may not like it, like how I may not like One Piece as much as I used to, but for people to come together about an anime is okay.    It's just I don't like this anime, and I don't mind others liking it.      The pacing of the story measures out for almost an eternity, Kirito's ambitions and goals and behaviors are never really justified, the second part's villain made NO flipping sense, Asuna was degraded as a character and as an archetype, Kirito is in desperate need of development, reasons are needed for how they can be so OP in many parts, and I want some more answers on how his sister came into the picture.    And . . . for the love of god . . . I want a redo on this anime's second half.    . . . and I think most people do as well.    . . . I don't think I can continue this part until I can get the FINAL and WORST anime I have ever seen out of my system.    And believe me when I say . . . it's BAD. NUMBER 1: " Pupa"    This anime.    This . . . anime . . .    I found this anime after scrolling around on Crunchyroll for something to watch in the Summer of 2014. I was interested in the genre and cover of the anime and decided to give it a try.    . . . I want to erase it from my brain.    Utsutsu Hasegawa and his little sister, Yume, are exposed to a rare and monstrous virus called 'Pupa'. Yume becomes a vicious man-eating monster, while Utsutsu gains regenerative powers. They are then approached, almost as if by magic, by a researcher who wants to contain Yume and Utsutsu and use them as guinea pigs for research. Utsutsu allows it, saying he'll do anything for his sister, and decides to become his sister's food source so she can assume a normal life.    While the concept is golden and has the potential for deeper symbolic meaning, like how it used the teddy bears as the shattering of Yume's humanity and innocence, and how Utsutsu's relationship with his sister was put to the ultimate test, it becomes . . . hard to watch. In more ways than one.

   The anime episodes are 4 minutes long each, leaving the entire series at a binge-able time of 1 hour. There’s not much to do with that much time, and it can’t be a fast-paced comedy like Hetalia. It’s a horror series. Horror series need to work quickly but have context and depth, or else the deeper meaning is lost. Since this is also animation, it means the drawings and backgrounds need to be visually appealing or eyecatching so the viewer can keep watching without problem. 

   Artistically speaking, the characters are well designed, but in animation terms, their movements are as bad as an early Studio Deen production. 

   And that’s where the praise ends. 

   There is an episode of the anime, each being five minutes long, of Yume just eating her brother, and saying "Utsutsu" over, and over, AND OVER again . . .    If you get the idea of where I am going with this, then you know exactly WHY I do not like this anime.    The concept itself is the driving force for the anime, and after that, NOTHING HAPPENS. Yume is kidnapped and experimented on, like Utsutsu, but he saves her and still decides to be her food source. She feeds on him, they love each other, they live normal lives, yadda yadda.    Nothing. Conventional. Or concrete. Happens.    Characters are introduced, but they come and go and are never touched on again unless the plot calls for them to make an appearance. Utsutsu and Yume's mother is cold and sees Yume as a monster, which may or may not be her delusions given how she was also abused by the kids' father, who is ALSO never developed outside of being a wife-beater, and both are who I consider to be the worst parents of all time.    Yume and Utsutsu, for all purposes of the anime, are the most developed and touched on characters. But, they never do much outside of adapting to their own hellish nightmare. Never do they ask Maria the scientist for a cure, never do they try to escape or move along with their lives.    They just get stuck in their nightmare, forever to be mad.    I hate it when animes like this come around. It introduces an interesting scenario, only to forget plot and context in favor of showing more and more grotesque imagery and disturbing content. I know it's rated M, but in all honesty, the incest insinuations and the fact that no one helps these kids out of this problem is enough to make me mad.    I will say it has beautiful designs. 

   I will say it had an interesting idea.    I will not say it's a good anime.    And, now you know why.    Well, there you have it. Those are the top ten anime I personally dislike, and in a few cases, hate to the core. But, just because I hate these anime doesn't mean that others can't enjoy them.    That's the power of the internet and personal opinion.    Now . . . I'm gonna go back to writing MLP reviews . . . I've been getting rusty, and I feel like I'm gonna get so much flack for these . . .

[asianhappinesss]

Ryan Gold Of Her Private Life – The Perfect Boyfriend

Any female fan who has watched Her Private Life will find themselves falling for Ryan Gold, a talented artist, and director of an art museum. Played by Kim Jae Wook (KJW), we are all wishing for a Ryan Gold to appear in our lives. No doubt a perfect boyfriend may only appear in dramaland, but there is still no harm in daydreaming a little, right? This is especially so when it is so hard to let go of Her Private Life after watching the entire 16 episodes. Ryan Gold has totally turned into a fanboy of his girlfriend, Sung Deok Mi, and they have shown us the way lovers should treat each other in a healthy and loving relationship.

Why Ryan Gold Is The Perfect Boyfriend

1. He Is So Good-Looking

Ok, I understand looks should be secondary in our search for a life partner. But how many women can resist a handsome guy, right? Alright, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and not everyone will find Ryan Gold to be that good-looking. But once he gazes into your eyes and smiles, the heat level will rise and your heart will melt by his charm. Coupled with his manliness and sex appeal, whatever barrier you have erected around yourself will simply crumble from the hotness of it all. If you have watched episode 11, you will understand what I mean!

2. He Accepts You For Who You Are

In Her Private Life, Deok Mi is a diehard fan of a K-pop idol. She invests a lot of her time into her fangirling activities and her home is filled with pictures of her idol. This is weird for most people, but Ryan Gold accepts her as she is. He doesn’t try to change her one bit. In fact, he doesn’t mind helping along if fangirling makes her happy.

As we all know, we can’t go into a relationship trying to change someone to suit our taste. Ryan Gold has shown the way here in Her Private Life. Who wouldn’t want a boyfriend who accepts you just the way you are and doesn’t think lesser of you just because of your flaws or weird hobbies?

3. He Knows How To Say Sorry

Every couple will have fights and arguments. But what’s important is how you resolve them and if you are in the wrong, an apology is in order. Although it is not easy to say sorry, Ryan Gold is the type of man who takes responsibility for his mistakes and apologizes if he has hurt his girlfriend. You can feel his sincerity and as such, it is also easier for the girlfriend to be forgiving.

So, if you have a boyfriend like Ryan Gold, you will know you don’t have to put up with an egoistic man who doesn’t know how to say sorry. Instead, he has the self-confidence to admit his mistakes to make you love him even more!

4. He Is Supportive & Understanding

In the drama, when Deok Mi got an opportunity to work in New York, Ryan Gold was supportive of her decision to go as it would be a great boost to her career. He was also understanding of her brotherly relationship with Nam Eun Gi, who showed interest in her.

Loving someone is not about holding them back but supporting them to achieve their best. It is also about being trusting and understanding instead of feeling jealous unnecessarily. Ryan Gold certainly knows what love is and he feels it deeply for his girlfriend. I guess single ladies out there can only dream of such a boyfriend and if watching Ryan Gold in Her Private Life has magnified your loneliness, I’m pretty sure you are not alone!

5. He Is Fun To Be With… And Sweet

Who wants a boring boyfriend? We all need some fun in our lives and it is always good to be able to do silly things with the guy we love. The spontaneity of the moment and ability to laugh at ourselves will make us much happier. While Ryan Gold can be really serious when working, he can also be very playful while dating. The flour play in the cooking scene comes to mind.

Imagine having so much fun while on dates with your boyfriend. And that fun can also be pure sweetness with the way he gazes at you, gives you little kisses here and there, and says things that melt your heart like butter. Try replaying the scenes of Ryan Gold with Deok Mi in your mind. Wouldn’t that make your sugar level shoot through the roof?

Ryan Gold Has Raised The Bar

Apart from the above reasons why Ryan Gold is the perfect boyfriend that every female would dream of, let’s not forget that he is also a talented artist. He can draw you while you are posing or even sleeping. It sure must be heartwarming to catch him looking at you and drawing knowing that he is now a fanboy of yours.

Well, of course, I know it would be impossible to find a Ryan Gold in real life. Sob! Sob! We can only re-watch the drama and the video clips to satisfy ourselves and let our imagination run wild. But even if Ryan Gold doesn’t exist in real life, he has certainly raised the bar of a perfect boyfriend in rom-coms. I think I probably can’t watch another funny romance drama anytime soon without comparing it to Her Private Life.

[veryangryhedgehog]

“Mike Miller’s Second Day”, an Ede Valley story by Hedgehog.

Mike Miller’s second day at St. Adelaide’s School for Gifted Youth opened rather abruptly at approximately 3:30 in the morning. Gradually, a series of bumps and scraping noises jostled him awake. Not that he’d been really that asleep anyway, strange bed and all. Was someone trying to break in? If so, they were being awfully loud about it.

After a minute he rolled out of the small bed, and approached the door. Mike didn’t have anything to defend himself, but he played soccer. He could just kick them. That’s how it worked, right? To his still half-asleep mind, anything was possible.

Mike opened the door an inch and peeked outside. There was someone in the room, fumbling with Doug’s door. He almost went in to tackle the intruder, but as his eyes adjusted to the dark he caught the faint glow of white hair. It was Doug who was trying to break into Doug’s room. Wait. That wasn’t right. Mike blinked, trying to wake himself up more.

“...and herd. Seems to make it all just a little bit...” Doug mumbled to himself, fumbling with his key.

“Doug?” Mike asked, opening his door a little more.

Doug turned slowly, the mere quarter revolution almost seeming to make him dizzy. He blinked several times. “Oh, hey Mike,” his words slurred a little. “I... forgot you were here.”

Frowning, Mike took a step towards his roommate. “Dude, are you high?”

“What?” Doug leaned back dramatically, and almost fell over. “No, no. nononono. I’ve just had a rather... shocking evening.” He paused, as if he had just now processed the words that had come out of his mouth. “‘Shocking evening,’ that’s a good one.”

“Are you... sure you’re okay?” Mike asked. He certainly didn’t look okay.

“Oh, yeah.” Doug nodded lazily as he finally managed to get his key into the hole on the doorknob. “‘S nothing I ain’t used to.” The door opened, and Doug almost fell into the room. “Good night.”

Mike bit his lip as Doug’s door closed again. That, to say the least, was weird. He hadn’t really seemed drunk or high. That was... something else. But he shook himself. What Doug got up to was really none of Mike’s business. He was older than him anyway. Mike was concerned, but there was nothing he could do about it right now at 3:30 in the morning. He went back into his room, plopped down on the tiny, hard bed, and tried to go back to sleep.

He maybe got another hour or so of shut-eye before his alarm woke him at seven. Mike had never been able to sleep well in new places, but knowing this didn’t make getting up any easier. Breakfast wasn’t until eight, but Mike wanted to give himself extra time to make sure he wasn’t late. He didn’t need it, because fifteen minutes later, Mike found himself all ready with a lot of time to kill. Eventually he decided to take a walk in order to shake off the weirdness of this morning.

Briefly, Mike considered asking Doug to go with him, but he found his door shut with the light off. He decided that it would probably be best to let him work off whatever he was on earlier. So he passed by Doug’s room and went out into the hallway.

It was cloudy and dark out, he could tell right away from the lack of light in the common room ahead of him. What lovely weather for his first day of class. The common room seemed devoid of life, at least to the point when he reached the stairs. Just then, Jilli unpeeled herself from the shadows in the corner and smiled, waving.

“Good morning, Mi-kun,” her grin widened as an exasperated look crossed Mike’s face. “You’re up early.”

“I don’t sleep well in new places,” he said, a little lamely. “I could say the same for you.”

“I don’t sleep well period.” She laughed, a little bitterly. “Comes from years of 5AM rehearsals, I guess.”

Mike’s eyes widened. “Were they really that early? I mean, I’ve heard some stuff about the idol industry, but that just seems too crazy.”

“No, it’s true. When you’re an idol, you have to live and breathe your work,” she explained. “You start to feel like a singing robot, or a certain voice synthesizer.” They both chuckled a little at that. “And sometimes it gets a little... claustrophobic.”

“How so?”

“Well, the managers and agents can be a little overbearing,” Jilli made a strange face. “Our image is controlled even more so than a lot of pop singers over here. We can’t even have boyfriends. Of course, most of us did anyway, but the pressure and paranoia tend to get to you after a while. I remember a lot of girls having really nasty breakups when their managers found out, or when they couldn’t take the secrecy anymore.”

Shaking his head, Mike’s eyebrows knitted together. “Jeez,” he said. “Sounds really depressing.”

“It is,” she admitted. “But you know, I do really miss it. The singing, I mean, and the performance. I was just about to graduate before my, uh, incident. If I’d been able to hang in just a little longer, I might have been able to become a solo artist.”

“You still could.” Mike smiled. “I haven’t heard you sing, but I’m sure a lot of people would want to hear it.”

Jilli laughed, though there was a hint of sadness behind it. “You’re a sweet kid, Mi-kun,” she patted him on the head. “But, enough about me. It’s almost time for breakfast. Have you seen Doug?” She noticed Mike’s sudden frown immediately.

“He was... out really late last night and, uh, came in a little messed up,” Mike confessed. “I thought it was probably best to just leave him alone.”

“Good call,” Jilli nodded. “It was most likely one of his sessions.”

“Sessions?”

She grimaced. “Yeah, there’s an on-site staff of psychiatrists here.” She paused momentarily as Mike’s face twisted in confusion. “Rich kid school,” was the only explanation she needed to give. “Only the best for our screwy little brains.”

But Mike was still concerned. “So, Doug...”

“I mean, he’s Doug,” she shrugged. “I don’t know, I’ve never noticed anything explicitly ‘wrong’ with him. But who knows. All I know is that every once in a while, those creepy people in white lab coats come to take him away, and he comes back all fucked up. He’s always back to his annoying self soon enough though.” Jilli tried to appear nonplussed, but Mike could tell that she was worried.

“What can we do to help?”

“Pff, hell if I know,” she said with a hint of frustration. “He never talks about it. Believe me, we’ve all asked. Victor, Sonia, you name it, not a word.” Jilli shook her head. “But if he really needs help, he’ll come to us. Anyway, should we get going? Sometimes they give out donuts to the early kids.”

Unfortunately, there were no donuts on this particular morning, just a large, drab room with many tables of assorted sizes scattered around its area. Metal beams stretched across the high ceiling, casting unnatural half-shadows on the tile floor. The cafeteria was about a third of the way full of students milling about or eating an early breakfast.

From somewhere in the quiet crowd, Sonia stood and waved to the two of them, and Mike followed Jilli over to a round table in a small, out of the way corner. “Good morning, Jilli, Mike,” Sonia beamed. “Is beautiful day, da?” Ah, so that’s where the sun went. Sonia had stolen it all from the sky.

“Beautiful?” Mike glanced out the long, thin windows to the vaguely miserable skyline. “I don’t know about that, but whatever you...” He broke off as he turned back to see that Sonia was no longer looking at him. Instead, her gaze was drifting away towards an empty corner, her eyes glassy, as if trying to see something she couldn’t quite make out. “Uh, Sonia? Are you—?”

“It’s alright, she does that sometimes.” Jilli waved it off. “We told you about it yesterday, didn’t we?”

Mike nodded, remembering. “That’s right, you did. Is she gonna be okay?”

“She’ll be fine,” rumbled a deep voice as Gil came up behind them. He put his hands on her shoulders. “Sonia?” He whispered, and her eyes fluttered a bit as she focused again.

“Oh, Gil,” she smiled again. “Good morning. I apologize,” Sonia bowed her head towards Mike and Jilli. “I was just, uh...” she looked confused herself. “Never mind.”

“Clearly, it was a spirit attempting to contact you from beyond the mortal realm.” Gil said sagely, placing himself in the chair next to her with that smooth, nearly catlike way which he did most things. “You must remember that you are most sensitive to these things, my lady. I will do some research in my Tomes of Knowledge and we shall see if we can communicate with it.”

“You really think it’s possible?” Sonia’s eyes widened. “Ooo, I can’t wait! I am wondering what kind of spirit it is? Perhaps a Viking! Great warrior with magic sword!”

Gil nodded. “Indeed. The possibilities are endless.”

Mike couldn’t help noticing how his smile fell half an inch, but at that moment, Jilli turned to him, raising an eyebrow, and they laughed silently as Gil and Sonia kept up their dialogue.

One by one, they went to get breakfast, and Mike couldn’t help noticing the gathering of faceless men and women in lab coats that were surrounding the perimeter of the room. They must have been the psychiatrists that Jilli was talking about. By the time the cafeteria was mostly full, there must have been a good ten to fifteen of them. Mike didn’t like it; they gave him the heebie-jeebies. But none of the others seemed particularly disturbed by their presence, so he tried to ignore the growing feeling of unease in his gut.

Just as Jilli got back to the table with a plateful of fruit and waffles, one of the psychiatrists moved to the platform on the far side of the room. The students quickly fell silent, so much so that you could have heard a pin drop. “And now,” the psychiatrist said, “a word from the Director.”

There was a crackle, and a burst of static that reverberated around the room. Mike looked up to follow the noise, and saw for the first time the speakers perched in the upper corners of the room. A strange noise came through suddenly, like someone clearing their throat, but he couldn’t quite tell because it sounded so distorted.

“Good morning, students. The new semester is here at last.” The voice boomed across the room, altered by static and modulation, but decidedly female. Probably something about its tone and inflections, Mike decided. “To those now joining us, welcome to St. Adelaide’s. To those old faces, welcome back to your home away from home.”

Jilli scoffed, and even Gil rolled his eyes. Sonia, on the other hand, had zoned out again.

Mike didn’t like this. The voice sounded pleasant enough, but there was something about it, something Mike couldn’t quite put his finger on. There were shivers running up and down his spine.

“Remember that you are all the most gifted students in the country, possibly the world, and we look to you all as the hope of the future. And it anyone has any concerns, questions, or snide remarks, feel free to talk to the friendly men and women in lab coats. They are here to help.”

The Director continued on for a few minutes, mentioning a few other events and announcements relevant to the student body at large, before finally wrapping up her address. “Thank you as always for your patience,” she said, “and enjoy your first day of the new semester.”

With another small crackle, the speakers fell silent, and gradually the students began to converse once more. “Well,” Mike muttered, “that wasn’t ominous at all.”

Jilli and Sonia both began to laugh. “Do not worry,” Sonia reassured him. “You will become used to it after a while.”

“I’m not sure I want to.” He frowned. “It all seems a little ‘Big Brother’ to me.”

“What sort of daemonic older brother do you have?” Gil asked, looking horrified.

Jilli sighed. “1984, Gil.”

He blinked. “Ah, yes. Of course. My apologies.”

The four continued talking as they ate breakfast, which if Mike was honest, was not very good. The texture of Aunt Marma’s Totally Genuine Maple Syrup™ stuck to the roof of his mouth. Finally, Jilli looked up at the clock and saw the time.

“Well,” she stretched, “first period begins soon. What’ve you got, Mike?”

“Uh...” he pulled out the slightly crumpled piece of paper from his pocket which had his schedule. “Ugh, Algebra II.”

“What instructor have you been assigned to?” Gil asked.

“Vantas,” Mike added after looking back at the paper.

Gil nodded, a determined expression settling into his pale features. “Then this is a battle we share, my friend. If you would have it, I would accompany you to our battlefield.”

As he blinked, Mike wasn’t sure he’d gotten a word of that. “Uh...”

“He has the same class,” Sonia translated. “He wants to know if you want to walk there together.”

“Thank you, my lady.” Gil bowed his head as he took her hand. “That was my question exactly.”

“Oh, um, sure! Thanks.”

Jilli stood, grabbing her trey. “Well, Sonia and I are off to choir, see you losers later.” She waved. “Oh, and Mike, tell Doug hi for me if you see him, yeah?”

“Will do,” he nodded, standing as well.

“You coming, Sonia?”

“I will catch up with you in few,” she smiled, before beginning to zone out again.

Gil’s gaze seemed to linger on her for a moment before he shook himself. “Come, young apprentice,” he said to Mike, his coat swishing dramatically as he began to walk. “The battle of mathematics awaits us.”

Mike would have probably gotten lost in the crowd had it not been for the fact that Gil stood out like a sore thumb. Students seemed to give him space wherever he walked. He didn’t seem to mind. Gradually, as the crowd broke away into the various directions of their classes, Mike was able to hear himself think again. Gil was silent a few steps ahead of him, seemingly lost in thought. Mike wondered just what went on in his head. He seemed like a really smart guy, so why did he persist in his delusions? Did he honestly believe that he was a warlock with infinite power? Or was there some other reason? Mike didn’t think he had the guts to outright ask him.

“So, Sonia,” he asked instead. That was what guys talked about, right? “Are you two—?”

“Our love transcends time and space,” he intoned. “I have loved her for four-thousand years, and I will love her for four-thousand more.”

“So, it’s complicated, huh?” Mike didn’t know what to say to this guy. He felt like he was stuck in the middle of a role-playing game with method actors.

There was almost no one in the hallway anymore, and Mike was sure he’d seen that motivational cat poster just a second ago. This place was like a maze. “Hey Gil,” he asked. “Are you sure we’re going the right...?”

Gil looked to the left and the right, then abruptly turned on his heel to face Mike. “A warning for you, Michael Miller.” His golden eye almost seemed to freeze Mike in place. “Your wariness of this place is not unwarranted. Don’t ignore your intuition. It may just save your life.” He wasn’t joking. “There are forces at work in this school that will attempt to pull your very being apart. I’ve been affected by it, Sonia, that ignoramus you call a roommate, all of us have. If I were you, I’d watch where you step.” It was not a threat, more like a warning. Gil seemed genuinely worried. And for a moment, Mike thought that he might actually understand what he was trying to say.

But the second passed as quickly as it came, and Gild grinned knowingly once more. “Now, on to slay this dragon built of overly complicated equations.” He started walking again, laughing manically, and after hesitating for a moment, Mike followed him.

Needless to say, he didn’t pay any attention during class that day as teachers handed out syllabi and repeated the same information over and over until Mike thought he’d never forget that three absences equaled a tardy. But he had too many questions running through his mind to care about any of that. He had had this lingering feeling that something was strange here, off even, except that everyone around him seemed so used to it that he thought he might be the weird one. “Don’t ignore your intuition,” Gill had told him.

But wait, why was he listening to Gil? He was delusional! It was probably just one of his wizard roleplaying things again. Yet something about what he’d said, the look in his eyes, the sincerity of his words. Gil had known what he was talking about. That hadn’t been some sort of weird fantasy metaphor, Mike could somehow tell. He was right, something was wrong here, Mike could feel it. And he thought the others could too, even if they didn’t talk about it.

There were so many mysteries, so many questions left unanswered. Mike decided to make a list. That would help him organize his thoughts.

1). Who was the Director? Yes, she was a crazy, modulated voice over a speaker system, but why? Why bother hiding her face and voice from the student body? It certainly made her intimidating and slightly creepy, but wasn’t enough of a reason by itself.

2). The psychiatrists. He didn’t know of any other school that needed ten of them. And the explanation of “rich kid school” simply didn’t cut it. To be honest, they seemed more like a security force than a group of doctors.

3). Why was everyone here so weird? Not just in their personalities, though the school was nearly stranger than a superhero’s rogue’s gallery in that respect. But more so in the way everyone seemed so nonplussed about all of these other questions Mike had. They didn’t care about the psychiatrists, or the Director, or the other host of strange things. Or maybe they were just really good at hiding it. And finally,

4). Doug. What the hell were they doing to him in his “sessions” that made him act like that? He’d hardly been able to walk properly. In addition, though he hadn’t really known him for that long, it seemed entirely out of Doug’s character to not talk to anybody about it. Most importantly, why was everyone not harassing him about it non-stop until he gave in and told them what was going on? That was the only way that they could help him, after all.

Maybe these questions wouldn’t be so confusing after he’d been here for a few months, but to be honest, he didn’t want to become numb to the strangeness like everyone else. He couldn’t handle not knowing these things. And if no one was going to help him, then he guessed that he’d just have to find the answers himself.

Of all the questions he had, one stuck out as the easiest to answer: Doug. He also had the distinct feeling that if he answered this one question, then all the others would begin to fall into place. Like dominos.

The rest of the day passed slower than paint drying, all of the thoughts and confusion cycling through his mind every time he saw a lab coat pass, especially whenever the students turned away from them. Finally, classes were done for the day, the final bell rang, and according to his schedule there was an hour before dinner. So Mike headed back across the snowy path to the dorm. Maybe Doug would be feeling better by now. Either way he needed to drop off his backpack, which was as good an excuse as any.

The light was on in the room, Mike could see it in the wide gap in the bottom of the door from the end of the hallway. At the very least, Doug was up. Mike didn’t know if he had known him for long enough to just knock on his door, but he ended up being lucky. When he pushed open the heavy door, Mike turned to see Doug at the bathroom mirror, trying in vain to smooth down his hair. He hadn’t noticed this morning in the dark, but now Mike saw that Doug’s hair was now even more static-y and gravity-defying than it had been yesterday. His sweatshirt sleeves were pulled up to prevent them getting wet, and Mike couldn’t help noticing a strange, metallic bracelet on his right wrist as it caught the bathroom light.

“Oh, hey Mike,” Doug grinned lazily as he saw him though the mirror. His speech was still a little slow, but he seemed much more normal now. Or at least, normal for Doug anyway. “How was your first day of class? Want to jump off a bridge yet?”

He didn’t even know, but Mike decided not to open that can of worms just yet. Maybe just peek inside the lid. “Almost,” he nodded instead. “Maybe give it another day.” Alright, now was the time. “Hey, so what happened last night? You were in really late.”

Doug paused for a second, before rolling his sleeves back down and turning to properly face Mike. “I’m sure the others told you about my ‘sessions’ right? Jilli, I’m guessing.”

“Two for two.” Mike nodded.

Sighing, Doug shook his head. “Listen,” he began, “the last guy I told even a little about what really goes on in this place, he disappeared. Just gone from the dorm one day and never came back. I don’t want that to happen to you, or any of the others. The only reason I’m even telling you this much is because I know you’ll just keep asking about it if I don’t. You’re that kinda guy, right?”

Mike looked down sheepishly. There went his whole plan down the toilet. “That makes three. But if you tell us, maybe we can help you.”

Much to his surprise, Doug started laughing. Whatever the joke was, Mike didn’t get it. “Your optimism is admirable,” Doug admitted. “But in this case, optimism alone won’t cut it. If I tell you not to go asking questions you’ll probably just do it anyway, so I’ll say this instead: keep your head down, Mike. That’s the only way you’ll get out of this place alive.”

He began to scoot past him towards the door. “Now, I hear that Jilli and the nerds are playing a rousing game of Dungeons and Dragons. So I’m gonna go crash it. If you want to come along, first one in gets to make the wizard cry.”

As he watched Doug wheel himself out of the room, Mike hesitated. That was the second vague warning he’d received today, and Mike wasn’t sure whose advice to follow. Doug told him to keep his head down, but Gil had told him to trust his intuition, which in turn was telling him to start asking questions and solving mysteries.

As much as Doug warned him against it, Mike really wanted to help him, and part of him couldn’t ignore the weirdness of this place. So, okay, he guessed he’d step carefully, but that didn’t mean he had to stop asking questions.

“Yeah,” he grinned at Doug, who was waiting in the doorway. “Let’s do it. I’ve always wanted to make a paladin fall.”

[felicityb-reviews]

Review Roundup - February 2018 Week 1

Hello, my loves!! My name is Jace (aka Felicity B), and this is your Review Roundup for Week 1 of February 2018!!

So... Last Friday, I mentioned making some changes to my Review Roundup format. The reasoning being that as I've expanded my network of Korean music channels, It's become very clear to me that it's too difficult for me to write a substantial review of 25+ videos every week without each review mixing into the last. I've also come to realize that I can't include *every* song I find that happens to be in Korean, and that's fine!! Most songs are either ballads or OST ballads (which are even worse), and it's just not worth my time to flog those at you guys.

So, I'm gonna try to explain this to y'all as best as I can. It sounds more complicated than it is in practice, but I wanna give y'all an idea of what's going on.

I'm gonna present to you all the playlist of songs for the week. From there, you'll see a new segment called the Titacular Ten. Yes, I am aware "titacular" is not a word, but catch me not givin' a fuck in these streets. These guys are songs I enjoyed, but didn't like enough to put in the Fabulous Five. They'll be rated (*not* reviewed) according to my replayability scale.

And speaking of my rating scale, I've decided to add a new category called KoKoNotABop (because nothing brings me joy more than pissing off the stans of my favorite K-Pop group). This sits in between Conditional Replay and Trash Bomb with Shuffle Bait. I decided to add KoKoNotABop, because there wasn't really anything for those songs that weren't complete Trash Bombs, but fell short. I could enjoy these songs from time to time, but I wouldn't intentionally put them in a playlist, so I didn't want to call them Shuffle Bait. In short, I just wanted to expand the range of my extraness.

Moving on, you'll see the Honorable Mentions/Trash Bombs of the week after the Titacular Ten. The Honorable Mentions are tracks that didn't make it into the week's Fab Five, but I still wanted to speak on. And if you've seen my previous RRUs, you know what Trash Bombs are.

I haven't had to rated many songs as Trash Bombs, but that should be considered a small mercy. Y'all know how I get when I don't like a song

So!!

Let's get started!!

This Weeks' List

The Titacular Ten

Saturn (Nevada51 featuring Gayoung Seo of Spy Girls)

Rating - Heavy Rotation

Perfectly Perfect (MxM of BRANDNEWBOYS)

Rating - Heavy Rotation

BLOCKED (Ash-B featuring Cherry Coke)

Rating - Heavy Rotation

Ballad of Full Speed (Evolution of Sound)

Rating - Conditional Rotation

Grayish (JUNA)

Rating - Conditional Rotation

Run Away (Mona)

Rating - Heavy Rotation

To the sky (CLC)

Rating - Heavy Rotation

If (Day6)

Rating - Heavy Rotation

Mi Amor (CoCoSori)

Mi Amori Dance Practice

Rating - Heavy Rotation

Good Bye (Hong Jin Young)

Rating - Heavy Rotation

Honorable Mentions

You Have a Crush On Me (No Brain)

If you guys can believe it, this was the type of song I loved during my J-Pop days. Oh boy, does this take me back.

And yes, I do realize this song is literally a decade old. There are idols active in the industry that this song is older than. But I'm gonna need y'all to bring me some freshly prepared fucks to care.

The children deserve to know about No Brain!!

Crush On Me (sorry, that title is too long to be typing over and over) is a punk track that is fun, personified. Every time I queue up the song to play, I just wanna dance the night away~ have my own little party, dancing and singing along. And don't think that you can get away from this song unscathed, cause the hook (neon naege banhaesseo) will stick itself in your brain and torment you till you're singing along like a good little Baby Borgie.

No Brain is a band that I want every single NuGen K-Pop (2014/2015) fan to get into. Every single one of you. Cause while this band is hella talented (they've literally been in the game for twenty years), they don't write music to show it off. They write music because they fucking love it. And that's the best kind, sis. I could clock this song for a lot of things I'd clock a modern K-Pop song for, but I won't because this song is entirely too fun to be picked apart like a science experiment.

My main reason for including Crush On You was that I love how fun this song is, BUT!! I also wanted an excuse to include No Brain's collab stage with Lovelyz from the 2017 MBC Year End Song Festival.

Now *that* was a oollab stage, ladies.

Rating - Heavy Rotation

No Gravity (Yoon Mi Rae)

Yoon MiRae is the OG Korean Female Rapper.

That's not my bias speaking (although it's definitely showing), I've never heard anyone speak ill of Mirae. NEVAH!! And I mean, why would they want to!?!?! She's magical. I literally can't say enough nice things about her.

I literally zone in on her and don't pay anyone else any mind when she's in a song. Whenever she's gracious enough to give us a solo, my wigs bow in reverence to her. I just love this woman so much. She can do no wrong in my book.

Gravity is a pre-release track from Mirae's upcoming Korean album. We have no word on what it's called or when it's dropping, but I already know it's amazing. Gravity is a midtempo rap ballad, and I usually find these cheesy af, but I really like Mirae's take on it. For those of you who've been YMR stans for a while, the vocals are arranged in Mirae's typical fashion - hard hitting rap verses, brackted in by Smoove™ vocals.

Yes, Mirae is the one who has your rap fave givin' Soulful Vocals™.

THANK!! HER!!

Gravity is just so nice, you guys. I don't know what it is about these Korean acts dropping really hopeful and healing tracks this year, but I want it to continue. These types of midtempos are usually reserved for Bad Days™, but I lowkey wanna listen to Gravity all the time. There's enough groove that it doesn't drag my mood down if I'm feelin' good, but at the same time, the uplifting vibe is great for everything kinda sucks.

Off Topic, but if y'all haven't heard Mirae's Black Happiness, I urge you!! It's S U C H a good song!! That's a song that's for the worst of days, sis.

Rating - Heavy Rotation

Free Somebody (Luna of f(x) x HEDA)

I really do not understand what the point of this release was. Can someone from SM DM me on Twitter and explain. Cause sis, this shit made no sense to me.

Firstly, congratulations to Ms HEDA are in order!! If you weren't aware (like me), everysing (a Korean karaoke company) and Genie Music (SM Entertainment's distributor) ran a contest called Battle Singer to select a new feature vocalist for an upcoming Station release. Why SM didn't give her her own Station track, I'm not sure, but I rather liked the way she sounded here. So, I can't be too mad.

Wha I *am* mad at, however, is why SM decided to have Luna and HEDA do karaoke on one of the unused sets of Younha's Parade video, and releasing that shit as a single. Y'all couldn't call in nobody to produce these vocals?!?!?! Every single one of y'all vocal producers were busy?!?!?!

K...

I'm just so over SMSTATION releases varying in quality and effort spent. Some weeks, SM puts in the time and effort to rock that shit out, but then we also get lazy as fuck all releases like these. And I get it, there was a contest attached to this and we don't know if SM is gonna pull Ms HEDA back in for a round 2. I'm hoping they do, but SM is fickle. I just wish this release was up to the standard as Luna and Amber's Lower. Some of y'all thought that song was dry af, but at least the video was dynamic.

Rating - KoKoNotABop

The Fabulous Five

5. Mystery (Jalhyejun)

Mystery sounds like Lim Kim and Neon Bunny decided to team up for a song. They didn't, but if they ever did, I'd need at least three albums worth of material from it.

Mystery is a very cutesy synthrock song. It lowkey reminds me of something Puffy AmiYumi would do 2003/2004, but it mostly sounds like a bonus track on Neon Bunny's Seoulite. Not a bad thing; Puffy AmiYumi were literally my gateway into J-Pop fifteen years ago (I still listen to them), and Seoulite is one of the best Korean albums of 2011.

Mystery sounds like it belongs in a kids' show, and that's exactly why I like it. It's not anything crazy energetic, but it's really fun and every time I listen to it, it puts the biggest smile on my face. And because it isn't super in your face, you could also use it very peppy background music.

We love a versatile queen, sis.

Rating - Heavy Rotation

4. To Do List (Kim Hyorin)

Okay, sis... I was a lil nervous when I heard the teasers for this. Too many of my faves been droppin' ballads as digital singles, and then disappearing into the ether. Hyorin is my girl, but I will *always* put the music first.

Fortunately,I had nothing to worry about; Hyorin did with To Do List what Henry couldn't do with Monster. Give me an engaging ballad.

Hyorin's To Do List is the same flavor of stripped back ballad as Henry's Monster; it's just Hyorin's sweet vocals layered over a clean electric guitar. It's just that she can emote with her voice and is an overall better vocalist.

I'm finding that I really enjoying this style of ballad. There's just an unexpected element to having a song be just electric guitar and vocals, ya know?!?! Like I mentioned above, I was very unsure about Hyorin making her solo debut under her own agency with a song like this, but I can see why she did it. Ballads do stupidly well in Korea, so Hyorin was catering to that market. BUT ALSO!! There's enough spunk here to keep the more adventurous crowd happy.

Of course, Hyorin could also sing me the dictionary, and I'd be like, "YASSS KWEEN!! BUILD THE CHILDREN'S VOCABULARY!! TAKE EVERY SINGLE OF MY WIGS, GODDESS!!".

So what do I know?!?!

Rating - Heavy Rotation

3. Unstoppable (The Night Of Seokyo x Minju)

I normally don't include covers on this list, and I definitely wouldn't put them in the Fab Five. But y'all, this fucking cover. I really wish they covered the entire song, because it's fucking M A G I C A L

Which only makes sense, because the original is even more magical, but still...

Minju and the Night of Seokyo's Unstoppable is a cover of Lianne La Havas's 2015 song Unstoppable. I have no idea why I don't know this song or artist, because they're both magical. I already said Unstoppable was magical, but I'm gonna say it again!! This song is so good!! Can I live in the feeling this song creates?!?! I'd enjoy that a lot, sis. It's just so calm and healing, and I need that to be my energy for all of 2018.

And Ms Lianne, y'all. My wig toppled off my head the first 30 seconds of the song, because ma'am looks like a Black goddess. Can I be her when I grow up?!?!?! She looks so cool, and her music is just so nice. God, I love just Black women, you guys. They're so amazing, and they never get credit for always being ahead of the curve (as mentioned in my Nega Dola review). But I love Black women. I wouldn't be who I am today without Black women. None of us would. And I think it's time that we acknowledge that!!

So now that I've gotten that out of my system (we are unapologetically stanning Black women in 2018 and beyond, sis), let's discuss the Night of Seokyo and Minju's cover of Unstoppable. Absolutely beautiful. Breathtaking. I felt like I was floating. I usually don't care for covers, because 90% of them fall into two categories - a) indistinct from the original because they do everything the original does and b) complete and total trash because they did Too Much™ when reinterpretting it. But Minju and the Night of Seokyo strike the perfect balance - the rearrangement for piano and vocal does Just Enough™ to stand out on it's own without feeling like it's fucked up the vibe of the song.

I really should have just done a standalone review of this cover, since I *clearly* have so much so say on it, but it's just so good. A very big thank you to my girl sunnysidae who found the original version for Unstoppable for me. You're the best, sis!!

Rating - Heavy Rotation

2. Baby Funk (Yoo Naul of Brown Eyed Soul)

Y'all.

Everything about this song n video is so Black!! I'm Shook™!!

I don't know Brown Eyed Soul that well, so I really thought Naul was the Black dude in the video. Thought BES had a whole ass (well, half ass) nigga in the group!!

Baby Funk's name is a little misleading - the only thing Funky about her is that guitar line (and the beatswitch that happens towards the end). But that's fine!! We love a good throwback to the Soul tracks of the '90s!!

I really don't know what to say, but tbh I really shouldn't have to - y'all *know* I L I V E for a good RnB/Soul track. And Baby Funk definitely delivers, babies!! I'm not gonna lie, the video did put me a off little, at first; I can't help but be suspect of the dynamic here. But you know, I'm just gonna receive this blessing, and keep it pushing. Naul made a love letter to Black culture with Baby Funk, and I Appreciate™.

Rating - Heavy Rotation

1. Blind (Planetarium Records)

Trigger Warning - intense strobe lighting effects are used in the live showcase video

One of these days, I'm gonna need to learn these dudes' names. Especially since they refuse to stop terrorizing my wig collection with their group albums.

Sidenote - whoever decided to bait n switch my Black ass with them teasers, ya mama's a heaux. And I expect a full version of T.M.N.T with vocals on Case#3!! That shit is too good to just be an intro!!

*ahem*

When I first saw the teasers for Planetarium's CASE#1, I didn't think much of it. I thought they were an EDM label, number 1. And number 2, teasers didn't really give me anything to be excited about. But they blasted onto the scene with Blah, which had me eatin' my words a lil. I didn't include ha in my Fab Five for that week, but I was definitely paying attention to them Planetarium boys. And then came a live video of Glue (which I did put in my Fab Five), and now Blind.

Blind is a very clear 180 from the very fun, very tropical themed Blah. But catch these niggas drivin' off into the sunset with my wig, because I am B A L D T.

Blind is an intense synthpop track with a slight RnB tilt. Which is to be expect, because Planetarium is an RnB/Hip Hop label. But guys, this song is just S O G O O D. If every idol boy band in K-Pop *has* to do overly series tracks because They're Super Serious Boys Who Very Serious All The Time Seriously™, I'm gonna need them deliver tracks on this level.

Show me you have soul, not that you have abs. I've seen enough shirt lifts to last me a lifetime, kids.

On top of giving us a music video that's a continuation of Blah, the Planetarium boys have also provided us with a live showcase video that you can watch here. Be mindful that there is intense strobing effects during the chorus bits.

Rating - Heavy Rotation

Alright loves, that's all I've got for you guys this week!! I hope the change in format isn't jarring, but I needed to do something to alleviate some of the work that goes into these lists. Cause pretty soon, I'm not gonna have the gobs and gobs of free time that I have now to do them, on top of my standalone reviews. My SHINee Feature Spotlight series has been halted, for now, but tune in on Friday at 12pm and 6pm EST for a special surprise. And be sure to tune in on Monday at 6pm EST for me full length review of the week.

Love, you guys!!

[dynamitekrp]

SEARCHING FOR DARLING . . .

PUBLIC PROFILE

birthday: november 11, 1994 years trained: 3 position: main rap, sub vocal, dance 

CAREER

2016, supporting role in webdrama 7 first kisses as ji-young 2017, main role in webdrama how are u bread as noh mi-rae 2018, supporting role in a drama work of love as gan bora 2018, supporting role in a drama the last empress as hyun-joo 2019 main role in a drama angel’s last mission: love as lee yeon-seo

IMAGE

the charming one, the wannabe actress, the plastic surgery monster, there are times when she feels as though she no longer belongs with violet, especially after all the years in the business. she was initially type-casted as the elegant and yet adorable rapper, sweet in all the right ways like a chocolate bonbon that suited the perfect idol image, but as she grew older, so did her aspirations and desires and greed, and the more she tried to venture into the world of acting, the more rumors about her kept piling up. some accused dabin of focusing only on herself while leaving the rest of the group in the shadows, others claimed that she was one of the reasons why violet’s popularity kept declining, and then there were those who defended her of course, highlighting her dedication to violet and the rest of the girls.

over the years, the very same labels remain, reminding dabin that she must work thrice as hard if she wishes to prove herself. however with all the new shifts and addition to the group, she finds herself often pushing harder, perhaps even more than she needs to in order to prevent others from stealing her thunder and shine as she is growing increasingly jealous. last came the rumors of plastic surgery, of how she wishes to purchase the ideal face, face of an actress, and while dabin has yet to confirm if any of that is true or if the wonders of time, aging and makeup have simply done their magic, she can’t hide the fact that the attention suits her, even if it’s not entirely pleasant. so what if her eyes and mouth and cheekbones don’t look as they used to? why can’t she finally be the girl she’s always dreamed of being? the elegant love interest, the type of a girl that others look up to, especially other younger girls.

BACKGROUND

they were so charming, the kims, especially the first daughter, dainty as a spring flower, with a perfect smile that matched her innocent beauty. but the second one, named dabin, was born desperate for attention and the way her parents had doted on her, spoiled her and given her everything certainly didn’t aid the case.

she was a mischievous toddler, disobedient and headstrong, and despite so, there was nothing more that she had wanted than to be like her older sister, who had always reminded her of a true classic beauty with her sweet manners and nearly perfect facial structure. if only, if only, she had often wondered, if only i had her charms and wits, and cheekbones and ebony hair. if only.

some could say that it was tv that had ruined her brain. she had spent countless of hours nearly glued to the luminous screen, observing, mimicking, imaging, and even memorizing the lines of her favorite shows and films, which she was often fond of reciting and performing in front of family friends and closest neighbors. she lived for applauses, words of kindness and of course unwavering attention, expecting it to always be bestowed upon her.

needless to say, she eventually started begging her parents to pay for her acting classes and while at first, her childish wishes were swept to the side as nothing more than a frivolous phase, it didn’t take long for them to notice her commitment. starting at the age of merely twelve, she had begun her little pursuit, auditing for countless of companies and simultaneously paying for numerous private acting classes, only to find rejection on every corner. you’re too young, you’re too old, you’re not slim enough, fix your eyes and nose.  

her parents had hoped that she’d over time outgrow her dreams, that she’d settle and follow in her sister’s noble footsteps, but while their first daughter was packing her bags and getting prepared for a life in america in order to pursue a medical degree, the second one was barely managing to maintain mediocre grades in school, far too blinded by the promise of stardom.

finally, at the age of fifteen, she was offered a training contract, but only for an idol. the idea seemed absurd at first, even preposterous, as she wasn’t a singer or a dancer, but despite so, she didn’t turn it down, deciding to look at the contract as yet another stepping stone, something that would pay off in the longrun, far down the line.many actresses had started out as idols, she had once told herself, and so why can’t i be like them too?

next came the dubious training sessions, day after day and month after month, and all she had done was hope for the best. if anything, it could be said that she was relentless, keen on debuting, willing to sacrifice her social life, sleep and even acting lessons in order to perfect at least one skill and get herself closer to her ultimate goal. it took three years, three years to transform into a mediocre rapper, but for an idol it proved to be just enough.

on the near cusp of her adolescence and alongside three other girls, she was at last given a chance to debut, only for the entire group to be overlooked by the industry. she cared, but not enough to weep, searching only for her personal gain in it all. none of it meant anything. not the debut. not the songs. not even the members. it was all manufactured, staged. faked till perfection and yet she couldn’t but feel as though something had been taken away from her.

she wasn’t an actress, and worst of all, her group was overshadowed, close to being forgotten.

then they simply had to add another member, another distraction, maybe even a bait for the younger crowd, but much to her great surprise, at least it had bestowed attention upon them in an abundance for a brief and saddening moment. after it quickly faded away again, they were left in a limbo, a constant state of trying to prove themselves.

career driven, she did her best to adapt to every new concept that had been thrown her way, but over the more recent years, she’s been focusing on each and every chance to make it in the world of television and film, distancing herself from the overly charming image of the group and turning to something more elegant, timeless and romantic, just like she’s always dreamed.

and so maybe the most recent merge with another company will finally be of some use when it comes to her career. stubborn, at times cruel, but trained well enough to lie without a second of thinking, she’s as charming as she’s devious and life means nothing if she can’t be an actress, a charming leading lady on the silver screen.

[dangermousie]

How do you feel about the controversy with Zhang Ziyi playing the 15 year old version of her character? I think she looks amazing and about the same as she did in The Road Home just slight aging but with makeup and effects she looks really good. I know it’s a pretty large difference but of course they haven’t had the same criticism for men 🤷‍♀️

I think netizens like to get upset about the dumbest things. First of all, Zhang Ziyi looks amazing - she was 41 when she filmed and she does not look it. (No, she does not look 15, but she looks a good decade plus younger than her actual age.)

But the other thing is - what kind of a weird nitpick is this, when to be consistent, they’d have to nitpick every period drama ever made, or close to it.

Because a heck of a lot of period heroines are supposed to be in their teens (and the bulk 15.) Yet, thankfully, I have never seen a cdrama cast an actual 15 year old; the bulk of times they don’t cast any teen of any sort either. Which is just as well, because I don’t think those teens would have experience and range, but also that would be gross for obvious reasons. 

I also have no idea what their beef specifically is with ZZ and this drama, to be honest. To cast an actress who is significantly older than a teen especially when the drama covers a lot of that character’s life, is the default. I do not remember people having fits about 31 year old Zhao Liying playing 15 year old Minglan nor 32 year old Yang Mi playing Fuyao who couldn’t have been older than 15 either, nor (to pick a recent drama), 37 year old Tiffany Tang playing 15 year old Xiao Chuo. All three of them are 15 (and then in their teens) for a large chunk of even most of the story and no eye was batted at that. WHY? I mean, it seems bizarre and arbitrary to say “well, a 31 year old (or a 37 year old!) is young enough to play a 15 year old, but I draw a line at 41.” Neither looks anything like 15 - so either all are OK, or all are not. (Honestly, even 25 year old won’t pass as a 15 year old, so seriously, unless one is crazy and is arguing they should have cast a literal teenager in this and every other period drama, this argument makes absolutely no sense.)

Also, I wonder if the netizens realize how creepy it would be to cast a 19-year-old actress (because let’s face it, they are not casting a 15 year old) opposite 36 year old Zhou Yi Wei/36 year old Yuan Hong/36 year old Tony Yang. Like - yikes! And yet I have not seen any complaints about those gentlemen being too old. Even if there were, it means that those netizens who are not fine with having an almost literal baby starring opposite a bunch of masculine, very very very adult men with a huge RL age difference, want the whole cast de-aged. Which - imagine the same story with a teen (or even 21 year old) female actress, barely out of his teens Third Prince and Helan Zhen and maybe 25-27 year old Xiao Qi. This would be a drama with a very different, and highly inferior vibe because let’s face it, it would be your typical pretty face idol cast and all the narrative heft and kick be gone. The reason this drama works so well is, in large part, because the cast is so amazing; they are all experienced heavy-hitters who also convey the part. What young actress can convey Awu’s steel and brains and elegance and contained fierceness? What barely out of puberty idol can have such dark, dysfunctional sense of chemistry yet danger the way Helan Zhen does now? What young guy can come across as believable as an experienced general who’s been through hell and back a dozen times and can inspire hundreds of thousands of men to follow him? Third Prince is the only one I can imagine being done well by a younger actor. And I would pick a great actor any time over someone age appropriate. With the cast that would make netizens happy, we’d get General’s Lady, where Caesar Wu was so very pretty but about as believable as a general as I would be, and his lady love was supposed to be smart but came across as petulant and not overly bright.

Not to mention this story takes place over decades; wouldn’t the complaint be those actors/actresses are too young for the latter part of the story, then? You can’t win.

So that’s my considerably more than two cents.

[deli-counter]

do all 155 questions you reblogged

you are a good person

1: Full name Delaney Quinn _____

2: Age 19 

3: 3 Fears Failure, elevators, my college 

4: 3 things I love biscuits, broad city, carpeted garages 

5: 4 turns on men sighing, intelligence, deep, low voices, people who take action immediately in bad situations 

6: 4 turns off arrogance/narcism, men who talk about cars a lot, flip flops, really strong perfumes and colognes 

7: My best friend Matthew!!!!

8: Sexual orientation Straight

9: My best first date Every single first date I have ever had has been utter shit in every way and I could explain but there’s no time nor drive to do this 

10: How tall am I 5′4″ - 5′5″ maybe?

11: What do I miss Bahn mi......i am paleo now and it sux but I do love complaining about it and seeming important for doing paleo 

12: What time were I born Like 12:15pm

13: Favourite color green!

14: Do I have a crush like 100 but none are realistic, accessible, or serious 

15: Favourite quote “From my rotting body, flowers shall grow and I am in them and that is eternity.” - Edvard Munch 

16: Favourite place honestly i love my bathroom i love pooping and workin on my best self 

17: Favourite food gnocchi

18: Do I use sarcasm yeah i think everyone does 

19: What am I listening to right now broad city dialogue 

20: First thing I notice in new person how they greet you/tone i guess

21: Shoe size 6 1/2 - 7

22: Eye color brown 

23: Hair color dark brown but the dye’s faded into just muddy brown with some red how interesting

24: Favourite style of clothing vintage 

25: Ever done a prank call? yeah 

27: Meaning behind my URL i do theatre and i’m pretentious 

28: Favourite movie The Help 

29: Favourite song ??? stupid ass question idk 

30: Favourite band ??? stupid ass question idk 

31: How I feel right now ??? stupid ass question idk 

32: Someone I love My sister!

33: My current relationship status Single 

34: My relationship with my parents really great tbh

35: Favourite holiday Halloween 

36: Tattoos and piercing i have none 

37: Tattoos and piercing i want i would like to get my ears pierced 

38: The reason I joined Tumblr to complain to my friend Jenna 

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? No

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? No

42: When did I last hold hands? Yikes who knows 

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? 45 min?

44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days? yep

45: Where am I right now? my room 

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? i’m taking care of someone else and i do not like drinking

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? depends 

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? when i’m not at college yeah

49: Am I excited for anything? i’m in spring awakening and we start rehearsals on saturday!!

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? yes my sweet sweet matthew 

51: How often do I wear a fake smile? as dramatic as this question is, so am I, and a lot  

52: When was the last time I hugged someone? today I hugged my beautiful and perfect sister 

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? that’s okay it was for a scene 

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not? oh yeah 

55: What is something I disliked about today? this was the worst day in a while so a lot 

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? dave malloy 

57: What do I think about most? anxiety dude and currently what caused my ptsd 

58: What’s my strangest talent? ?? idk i do a great Viola Dais in The Help impression as risky and bad as that sounds 

59: Do I have any strange phobias? sure but mostly just elevators 

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? in front 

61: What was the last lie I told? great question

62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? neither 

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? yes and yes 

64: Do I believe in magic? I believe in the power of God so sure that counts

65: Do I believe in luck? nah 

66: What’s the weather like right now? it’s like 67 rn 

67: What was the last book I’ve read? I ready mostly scripts now so idk 

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? no 

69: Do I have any nicknames? Squeaky, Del, Delami, Lane, Joanne, Jew, etc. 

70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had? I had like a kidney stone that sucked. Idk about injury. A chunk of my nose is missing due to skin strep I had as a child. 

71: Do I spend money or save it? Both

72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue? If I help it up there yeah 

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me? I have an old Lady Be Good postcard near me with some pink on it, and Sorcerer’s Stone is beside me and there’s some pink on that cover 

74: Favourite animal? Koala I think 

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM? Sleepin maybe or playing Sims Freeplay 

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? None he’s got one name like Beyonce 

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? The Private and Intimate Life of the House from Great Comet 

78: How can you win my heart? Genuinely respect me 

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? “Rip it up”

80: What is my favorite word? I like cynosure a lot. Someone called me that once and it was always very special to me. 

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr rossgellerfanclub 5 times 

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? does anyone wanna pay for my college 

83: Do I have any relatives in jail? no

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? shapeshifting 

86: What is my current desktop picture? a pixelated ocean and sky it’s very cute 

88: Bought condoms? no

89: Gotten pregnant? no 

90: Failed a class? maybe? to be seen 

91: Kissed a boy? yes

92: Kissed a girl? yes for a scene at school 

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? no

94: Had job? define job 

95: Left the house without my wallet? yes

96: Bullied someone on the internet? no

97: Had sex in public? no

98: Played on a sports team? no

99: Smoked weed? no

100: Did drugs? no

101: Smoked cigarettes? no

102: Drank alcohol? a sip once or twice and it’s bad man i hate it 

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? paleo bitch!!!!

104: Been overweight? ya

105: Been underweight? no

106: Been to a wedding? yes several 

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? yes easily 

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? yes easily 

109: Been outside my home country? yes

110: Gotten my heart broken? no 

111: Been to a professional sports game? yes

112: Broken a bone? no

113: Cut myself? yes

114: Been to prom? yes

115: Been in airplane? yes

116: Fly by helicopter? no

117: What concerts have I been to? american idol but the season with carrie underwood 

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? no

119: Learned another language? like partial sure

120: Wore make up? yes

123: Dyed my hair? yes

124: Voted in a presidential election? yes

125: Rode in an ambulance? yes

126: Had a surgery? no

127: Met someone famous? yes! a few but i don’t feel like listing

128: Stalked someone on a social network? we all have

129: Peed outside? no

130: Been fishing? no

131: Helped with charity? yes

132: Been rejected by a crush? yes

133: Broken a mirror? no

134: What do I want for birthday? cash and a nice dinner and maybe a kiss!!

135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names? 2! i would like a boy and a girl. Names like Ezra and Porter and stuff idk 

136: Was I named after anyone? Elaine from Seinfeld, cause her nickname was Laney 

137: Do I like my handwriting? it’s alright yeah 

138: What was my favourite toy as a child? i loved barbies man and I had a lovely babydoll 

139: Favourite Tv Show? 30 Rock 

140: Where do I want to live when older? NYC then Chicago then somewhere weird like Vermont and then Germany 

141: Play any musical instrument? i used to play flute and a lil piano but now like nothing. trying to work a vocal looper tho 

142: One of my scars, how did I get it? cutting myself

143: Favourite pizza toping? caramelized onion and basil 

144: Am I afraid of the dark? yeah a bit 

145: Am I afraid of heights? yeah

146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? i made a friend online when I was like 12 and did not tell my parents lol 

147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end? yes of course

148: What I’m really bad at dancing 

149: What my greatest achievements are surviving ptsd is pretty fkn cool 

150: The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me not discussing that here 

151: What I’d do if I won in a lottery pay off college, pay off my parents debt, donate to charity, buy myself some luxury apartments and a dog, some amazing food, get some good bras, see a ton of shows on broadway!!!!!

152: What do I like about myself persistence and humor 

153: My closest Tumblr friend jenna we don’t talk much anymore but I’ll always love that b 

154: Something I fantasize about being a greek goddess or in the center of a victorian love triangle quite honestly 

155: Any question you’d like? ------ N/A

THANKIE!!!!!!!