#i think shes at that stage too of not realizing she CAN ask that without being called weird/strange
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I want a new weighted blanket that's a little cooler, and my very specific sensory stipulations would rather have a feel before buying ANYTHING.
We were shopping the other day and my own mother needed to feel blankets/pillows to understand what I meant by Too Much Texture.
My niece (who we believe is also on the spectrum), had no problems understanding Texture differences. Then she found this hypersoft blanket and it was the only one left. [Koolaburra Ellowyn by Ugg].
Anyway...I want to touch all the available weighted blankets before choosing and that's not possible.
#autsim#actually autistic#actually audhd#my neice is a mess AND she's at the pre-teen stage#her behavior is very reminiscent of my own when i was younger#my symptoms being called ✨️quirks✨️#shes sleeping ON her stuffed animals#which isnt great in the long run#i think its because its softer#im like that too#but her mother asks me: why doesnt she communicate/express her feelings on it#i think shes at that stage too of not realizing she CAN ask that without being called weird/strange#im hoping that our shopping day will help her speak up#right now she's lying (wine cooler/food/not sleeping)#and her mother's choice is to take away her stuffed animals since she sleeping on them#shes insomniac but they dont have money right now#so i gave them a list of alternatives to try#and they're like shes not going to try them#the only thing that goes to my head for that is demand avoidance#im trying to help my neice by advocating for her and maybe through example of myself to show her better options#she wants white bedding
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The Company
Slave Contract
Smut and Angst (Slave contract, idol turned sex toy, accepting fate )
Chapter 18
3890 Words
(Miyeon becomes the CEO’s newest assistant and gets trained in her new role. Four idols learn about the consequences of signing contracts without knowing what’s in them. Future sex toys?)
It’s been a few weeks of hard work with setting up the survival show. Luckily, my new assistant, Miyeon, has been a great stress reliever.
After that first night, she was sore for a few days, but you kept her busy in other ways. At first, she was hesitant, asking me if this was really something she had to do. You asked if she read over the contract and said she slightly did but mainly browsed through it when signing.
“You should have a copy; look it over and ensure you know about your duties.”
It took her a few hours to go through everything, and with your explanation, she realized her actual fate, “So I belong to you then?”
“Pretty much.”
“I read you can even breed me if you wanted to.”
“I could, but we can put that on hold if you like. You only need to help me out with some things.”
“Like what?”
“I also want to make your former group members into my toys.”
Miyeon’s eyes widened from your statement. She was just with them not too long ago, and now she’s being asked to betray them so you can use them for pleasure?
“What you need to do is tell me some things about them. If they sign a contract like yours, I’ll take some years off it.”
Miyeon hesitates and thinks for a while, knowing she can’t return if she does this.
“So what’s it going to be?”
“Okay, what do you want to know?”
———
“Jieun set up a meeting with the four girls. I want to meet all of them.”
“Of course, I’ll tell them to come later today.”
All the information Miyeon shared about her former members helped you set the perfect conditions for today’s meeting. You’ve always had a dream to claim a whole group for yourself. You know that you’ll have a set of four toys to play with at the end of the day.
It’s your last meeting of the day. Jieun is talking to Jennie and her group mates about the meeting and its possible lasting effects.
Jieun looks at her device and sees your message about letting them in.
“The CEO is ready for you.” She opens the door, and they walk in.
“Oppa, you’re here to see the CEO?” says Lisa.
“No.”
Rose then speaks up, “He’s the CEO.”
“No, he’s Oppa; he helped us with moving in. A CEO wouldn’t do that,” said Lisa.
Lisa looks at you with an innocent face, waiting for your reply. “Rose is right; I’m the CEO of the company.”
“But we hung out together,” whined Lisa.
“Lisa, he might have his reasons,” replies Jennie
“Jennie is right; I do have my reasons. I aim to scout for talent and potential and put them into a group. I want to create an international girl group. As CEO, I wouldn’t have the opportunity to do that, but as a staff member, I’m about to see someone’s true personality. I want to debut you four as a girl group really soon.”
The four of them look at each other in excitement. Hearing about being a worldwide star seemed out of reach, but it is now possible. “Would you four be interested in the girl group I plan to create?”
Lisa is the first to say yes, “Of course, oppa! I want to perform all over the world!”
Rose imagines herself on stage, singing music she composed to millions of fans worldwide, “I…I would love to as well.”
Jisoo replied, “I, too, want to be in a group with them.”
The three look at Jennie, who looks at you and replies, “Of course, I want to stay with my members forever!”
You then reply, “Great. I’ll make you four into worldwide superstars!”
They giggle amongst and hold each other’s hands at the exciting news.“I plan on creating my personal label, and I’m interested in you four joining as the first group.”
Jennie asks, “What’s the difference between it and the company?”
“Priority and privileges.”
Jisoo, confused, asks, “What do you mean by that?”
“I’ll be personally working with you and providing you with all the best things. That includes clothes, jewelry, and deals with brands and magazines. I also plan to have a separate building for music recording, training, etc. You all will have access to the best, no compromises.”
The girls can't help but smile at the idea of having access to the best. Rosé's dream of being a musician is closer than ever; she must make this happen. “I want to do it.”
“I assumed this was the case, so I prepared a contract for each of you as a group contract. I’ll talk to each of you individually since this will be an important decision.”
Jieun escorts all the members to individual rooms, so you can gather your thoughts before the meeting. After you’re ready, you call for the oldest, Jisoo.
“Come have a seat, Jisoo.”
Jisoo sits, looking nervous with the two of you alone.
“We went a bit over the group contract earlier, but I want to review your individual one this time. Is there anything you’d like to add?”
Jisoo is already thankful for the opportunity to receive all the support from the company. She doesn’t want to overstep and get greedy, “No, I think I’m okay as it stands.”
”Are you sure? I remember reading in your profile that you wanted to be an actress. Am I right?”
Jisoo shyly tilts her head forward and replies, “Yes, I wrote that down when I joined as a trainee.”
”Are you still interested, or have you given up on that dream?”
There is a slight hesitation, “I want to sing and perform with my teammates, but I still want to be an actress.”
There it is, the hook. “I can make it possible if you’re still interested.” Jisoo’s ears perk as she hears your words, “Really? How?”
The two of you talk for a while until you reach an agreement. Jisoo immediately signs the contract without a second thought after promising to support her as much as possible. Your only condition is for her to agree with your choices without a second thought.
——
The next one you talked to was Jennie; she was much easier to talk to, and you could get straight to the point. She sat before you, “I’m going to be real with you; I want you and your members. Not just as artists but as my toys.”
Jennie slides the contract to the side, “So this is what this contract is about… I can’t blame you; my members are cute. Is there someone you have in mind?”
“Rosé. She has an amazing voice, and her desperation to become a singer is such a turn-on.”
“She did say she’ll do something to become one, but the only issue is that she’s into girls, not guys.”
“Won't you think that would be better? Rosé tossing her interests to the side, that’s something I would love to see. I want to make her my plaything.”
Jennie bites her lip at the idea of her member being corrupted, “you know she’s a virgin too; well, everyone is except me, of course,” says Jennie while sticking her tongue out.
“You must be proud, huh.”
It’s true; Jennie is proud of herself. With her by your side, she knows that her chances of being successful are much better with you. “Of course, I love being your toy babe. It’d be even better if you make all of us into your toys; just imagine playing with us whenever you want.”
”You know what a guy wants; you’re so bad.”
”I want to make sure you’re well taken care of.”
The two of you continue to talk; she even provides some ways to make the girls agree.
———-
After Jennie, the next one was Rosé; she sat in front of you and asked, “Were you serious about introducing us to the international market?”
”Of course, with your talent, I know you all can succeed. I mean, with your voice, it's a guarantee.”
You see the sparkle in Rosé’s eyes; her dream of becoming a singer is closer than ever. “So, where do I sign?”
You pull out the contract, “This right here is your individual contract. It states the expectations from both parties, which is the label and yourself. Read it over, and if you want to add anything, let me know.”
Like her members before her, she just skims through the contract and asks, “Would it be possible to invite my parents and sister for my debut?”
”Of course, they are more than welcome to visit you. If you want, I can fly them over. I remember you mentioning that your sister is pursuing law, right?”
”Yeah, she’s still in college and looking to intern at a firm in Australia. You know that she’s been so supportive of me becoming an idol that I really want her to see my debut.”
”If that’s the case, then I promise you to make sure your whole family sees you on your special day.”
“I promise that you won’t be disappointed; I’ll make sure that our group becomes the best group,” as she picks up the pen, singing her contract.
———
Lisa, the maknae of the group, was the last member you had to meet. It didn’t take much convincing and only asked to be given the creative freedom to make choreographies and a space to dance.
“You really got us, oppa. Or should I call you CEO-nim?”
“Whatever you want.”
“I’ll call you oppa.”
“I’d like that.”
She smiles and asks, “Where do I sign?”
———
It’s been a few weeks since the members signed their individual contracts. It didn’t take long for them to see the immediate effect, such as a new apartment with rooms of their own, access to the new building, and other perks.
“Unnie, congrats on your internship!”
“Thanks, it all happened so suddenly. I can’t wait to spend some time with you.”
“When do you fly in?”
“In a few weeks, they even gave me an apartment and are paying for my accommodations.”
“Really? That’s great. What firm are you working with?”
“That’s the funny part. I’ll be doing my internship through the Samsung group but will be in one of their subdivisions.”
“Really?”
“Yes, I got an email saying that they were looking for great talent and received a recommendation. I recently finished the acceptance process and will be signing the contract. The best part is that if they like me, they might offer me a job and pay for law school. I’m so excited, Rosie!”
Rose is more than happy to hear the good news from her sister. She’s been so supportive of her dream to become a lawyer; now it’s her time to cheer for her. The only thing is that she can’t shake off a feeling that something isn’t right, but she quickly puts it to the side and continues her talk with Alice.
——-
“Hello, mom, how is everything back home?”
“Everything is wonderful, Lisa. We have had some good news recently.”
“Really? What is it?”
“Remember how your father was thinking about expanding and was looking for investors for his restaurant?”
”Yeah, I do. He wanted to open up a new place, but it was expensive if he wanted to do it in the middle of the city.”
”Well, your dad found an investor. They want to invest in not only one restaurant but probably two or more. They want to remodel this one and expand the size. Your dad is so happy.”
”I’m so happy for him. He’s been working so hard these past few years.”
”What about you, sweetheart?”
”Good, I think coming to Korea was a great choice. I can’t tell you much right now, but I’m happy where I am. My group members make me feel at home.”
————
All the members gather in your office, the four of them excited for the weekend to begin.
“How are you four doing?”
Jennie responds, “Great, we have had a free day today, so we’ve been resting after a busy schedule.”
”Oh, I’m sorry for interrupting you all during your day off.”
The members nod, “It’s okay; we still have Saturday and Sunday off. You must have called us to say something important,” says Jisoo.
“Yes, I wanted to ask how you four are adjusting to your new life?”
Rosé responds, “I love the recording and music room. I’ve spent most of my time there.”
”For me, it’s the practice studio; it’s so nice and spacious, I love it,” says Lisa.
”What about you two?”
Jennie responds, ”Jisoo and I like our new apartment. It’s nice to have our own space.”
Jisoo nods, “I agree with Jennie; we like the new apartment. Thank you so much.” The four of them slightly bow, thanking you for their new perks.
“That’s great. I want to make sure that my future worldstars are given the best. Since you have tasted a bit of what I’m giving you, I think it's time for you to return the favor.”
The members were surprised by your comment and asked, “What do you mean?”
“The favors, remember. It’s in the contract you all signed.”
Rosé responds, “I don’t remember seeing it.”
Knowing this was bound to happen, you pulled out a copy of their contract. You flip through the numerous pages until you reach the section you want to show them. “This is the part. It clearly states that you all are required to provide me with services on a regular basis in return for the perks you receive.”
Rosé, shocked, says, “What kind of favors?”
With a straight face, you reply, “sexual favors, of course.”
Rosé, Jisoo, and Lisa look shocked at your comment; Rosé stands up and tries to leave when Jennie grabs her hand, stopping her. “Don’t.”
Rosé looks at Jennie in a serious expression and takes a seat. “Why didn’t you say anything before our contract signing?”
“I told you to check multiple times. You’re all adults.”
Jisoo asks, “Is it possible to remove that part out?”
“It’s possible, but that would mean you are breaking your contract.”
Rosé then asks, “Is that going to cost a lot?”
“In simple terms, yes. The cost of a breach in the contract is a lot, plus the cost of room and board, food, training, and other expenses can be in the billions of won.”
They all look at each other, trying to figure out what to do. They don’t want to give their bodies as payment; it seems so wrong, but the cost of paying large amounts of money also seems too much.
“What if we can pay you some other way?” says Lisa.
“Listen, I’m going to be frank with you all. I want you four, so I’m going to give you an hour to think about it. I’ll step out and come back, so expect an answer.”
You stand from your chair and begin to walk towards the door, “Just remember that this will have a great impact on both your personal and professional life,” you say before exiting.
The four of them finally get a sign of relief with you gone. They stay silent, taking in what just happened a few moments ago.
Jennie breaks the silence, “What do you all plan on doing?”
No one answers; instead, Jisoo stands up and looks around your desk for anything that can help them. She moves the mouse off your computer, causing it to turn on. She sees a folder with the initials of each member, “Girls, come here.” The members stand up and circle around the computer. Jennie grabs the mouse and clicks on the folder with her name to see basic information and a copy of your contract. “Nothing helpful.”
Suddenly, something catches Rosé's attention when she notices a fold named “Alice.” She grabs the mouse from Jennie and clicks on it. There are multiple files, but a video recording gets her attention. She clicks on the recording, and the face of her video pops out. “Hello, my name is Alice Park. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to intern at your company. You’re the biggest employer in Korea, and interning at your company is a dream come true. Pursuing law has been a passion of mine since I was young, so I will do my best to meet your expectations. Thank you so much, and hope to see you real soon.”
Rosé can’t believe it, Alice’s employer is you? Many things run through her mind to the point it’s hurting. “Did he plan everything out? What should I do? Should I tell Alice?”
Jennie and Jisoo notice Rosè’s sister in the video and try to ask her what’s going on. Instead, Rosè stays silent, gathering her thoughts and what she should do. “Rosè, what’s going on?”
Lisa continued searching when she found a file named “Restaurant Investments.” She clicks on it and sees her dad’s picture and other documents that mention investing in his business. “What���s going on?” She sees a brief interview that mentions his reason for doing what he does. He responds that he loves the expression his family makes when they taste his food, especially his daughter. However, since she was young, she would love his food which is one of the reasons he wants to do his best. “My daughter is trying her best to make her dreams come true, as an old man I should also do something that my daughter should be proud of.”
Lisa doesn’t have to think twice, she knows what she has to do. “I’m going to make sure his dreams come true no matter what.”
An hour passes by, the four of them are sitting in the chairs as you enter the room on the dot. Rosè and Lisa look at you with an intense expression while Jisoo holds both their hands. Jennie, who is sitting in the back looks at you with a slight grin but quickly hides it when you sit on your chair.
“I gave you four an hour. What are your answers?”
There is a slight hesitation as the four look at each other, thinking on what to say. Suddenly, Lisa raises her hand and says, “I’ll do whatever you want.”
The rest of her members' eyes widened as the maknae of the group was the first to respond. You can’t stop yourself from smiling, “Good choice.”
You look at the other three and say, “Lisa seems to have more conviction than anyone else in the group.” You look in Jisoo’s direction, “Jisoo, I assumed you would be the first to say something, but I guess Lisa, the youngest out of your four, has more guts.”
Jisoo clenches her fist, but she’s scared. There is no way she couldn’t be. “What about you Jennie?”
She lifts her head, “So you’ll keep your promise and make me known worldwide?”
”Yes, there wouldn’t be anywhere in the world that won’t know your name.”
’Okay, I’ll do it too. I’ll do whatever you want, even be your personal toy.”
Jisoo lifts her head, “Jennie…” Her younger members are much braver than her. She tells herself that she needs to be the one to protect them, but instead they’re taking the reins of their future. She makes up her mind, “I…I’ll do it too.”
”Great. Three out of four.�� You look at Rosé who’s head is still down, debating about making the right choice. Her answer will determine not only her future but her sister’s as well. “Alright. If I do this, you promise not to do anything to Alice, right?”
”Yes, I promise.”
”Okay, I’ll do whatever you want; just keep your promise.”
You smile, knowing that the four women in front of you have decided to submit to you. “I’ll make sure to try you four with a lot of care.” You stand up and check out their body as they stand. “I want to make sure that you're all serious about your choice. Undress yourself right here, I want to see what I’m going to be working with,”
Their eyes widened from your request; they didn’t think it was going to happen so soon. “Okay.” Jennie is the first one to undress by first removing her blouse, bra, pants, and underwear.
“Good girl.”
”Thanks,” Jennie smiles from your compliment.
The other two members follow, undressing themselves until they’re completely nude. Rosé is the last one to undress, she struggles to take her panties off with one arm covering her breast.
“Take your arm off, I want to get a good look at you.” She slowly moves her arm and puts it to the side. “There, better?”
“Feisty one. If you don’t want to do this you can just leave.” Rosé pinches her arm, stopping herself from leaving. She wants to get out of there but knows she can’t. “No, I’ll behave.”
Satisfied with her answer, you continue to walk around them, inspecting their flawless body. Each one of them have small but perky tits, a flat stomach with a cute little ass. Lisa yelps when you touch her ass, while Jennie smiles.
“Since you all have the weekend together, how about we have some fun.” The girls don’t have to guess what you’re trying to say, they know what type of “fun” you’re talking about. “Any volunteers?”
There’s a silence, no one moving or reacting in any way. “No volunteers? I guess I'll choose the one I want to have first.” You go around, tracing your finger against their back. You feel them tremble, not wanting to be the first to get chosen.
“I really want to have all of you at once, but I want to give you some one-on-one attention. You’re all too good, I can't make up my mind.”
You stare and them, looking up and down as you decide on who to fuck first. You see one of them grabbing onto their arm, looking nervous. You think to yourself it's always best to pick the one who has the most to lose and make them yours.
“Rosé, I want you tonight.”
You exit the room, leaving her standing alone in shock. She trembles, realizing that she’s going to give her body to a man. She’s never once thought about having relationships with a male, not even in the slightest.
———
Jieun walks into the room, “Rosé, dear. Why the sad expression? You should be happy that he chose you.”
There’s no response from Rosé, and instead frozen in thought.
“Anyways, I’m here because I’m going to take all you with me to choose an outfit for when he asks for you. Just remember that the more effort you put in the better the outcome,” says Jieun in a serious voice.
As they enter the room they see multiple racks of lingerie. Rosé’s eyes go wide as she figures out what she is going to wear.
#kpop smut#the company series#the company#TM smut#idol x male reader#k pop idol smut#reader x idol#kpop idol smut#idol smut#blackpink x reader#blackpink smut#blackpink lisa#blackpink jennie#blackpink jisoo#blackpink rosé#cho miyeon#miyeon cho#miyeon
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“MY DAUGHTER HATED ME!”
pairing: dad!ewan mitchell x mom!reader ; ewan mitchell x actress!reader
part of series: y/n, ewan and elowen mitchell
part 2
summary: following the success of House of The Dragon, you and Ewan were invited to appear on Jimmy Fallon’s The Tonight Show. However, it seems that the story about your only daughter, elowen captured the majority of the audience's attention after that interview.
word count: 1,3k
warning: english is not my first language, use of y/n, ewan and reader are actor and both are in hotd cast, fluff (?), etc
masterlist | ADD YOUSELF INTO MY TAGLIST HERE
That evening, you and Ewan stepped onto the stage of The Tonight Show, greeted by enthusiastic applause and cheers from the audience. Jimmy Fallon, with his familiar smile, guided you and Ewan to your seats and then thanked both of you for coming on the show.
"Let me introduce tonight's guests, the actors from House of The Dragon, please welcome Ewan Mitchell and Y/n Mitchell, playing Prince Aemond Targaryen and Princess Visenya Targaryen," Jimmy announced
"Thank you both for being here," Jimmy expressed his gratitude to you and Ewan for accepting the invitation to be interviewed.
Ewan, with his usual calm and slightly shy demeanor, responded modestly, "No, no, thank you for having us." You also smiled warmly and added, "Yes, thank you, Jimmy, for inviting us here; it's an honor."
Jimmy chuckled and continued his introduction to the audience.
Jimmy then began, "First, I want to congratulate both of you on the success of House of The Dragon!" His congratulations were met with enthusiastic applause from the audience, accompanied by loud clapping. Jimmy joked, "Well—they're already too fond of you guys."
"Thank you, Jimmy," you and Ewan said in unison, both of you still smiling brightly.
"So, Ewan, can you tell us about your life after the explosion of House of The Dragon?" Jimmy asked, but before letting Ewan answer, he quickly added a clarification, "I mean, it was already a hit after Season 2 aired, but now with Season 3 out, how has it changed?"
Ewan clicked his tongue lightly and said, "Well… I think it has, a bit. People still seem like they want to run away from me whenever I step out of the airport or when they see me on the street." After saying that, Ewan couldn't help but laugh, and you, having witnessed those moments, couldn't stop laughing either.
Jimmy laughed along, then turned to you and asked, "Is that really true, Y/n?" All you could do was nod in agreement, confirming it was indeed true. After laughing too much at your husband's story, you caught your breath and shared, "Once, on a flight to the set, a little girl came up and asked me to get his autograph because she was too scared." You burst out laughing at the memory, and so did Ewan, Jimmy, and the audience.
"But I want to affirm to everyone that my husband, Ewan Mitchell, is a good man, a good husband, and a good father!" you said, looking at Ewan with pride. The pride and love in his eyes for you were unmistakable, making the atmosphere in the room even warmer.
Jimmy couldn’t help but laugh again, sharing in the pride and joy you both displayed.
“Speaking of Ewan as a father, does your daughter know that both of you are famous?” Jimmy asked the two of you.
Ewan responded, “She does… but she only found out recently.” He chuckled softly, explaining that for a long time, their daughter had been a fan of Harry Collett without realizing that her own parents were co-stars with him, and perhaps even more famous.
“On her 3rd birthday, after she blew out the candles, I asked her what she wished for,” Ewan continued, his face glowing with pride as he spoke of your daughter.
“She told me, ‘I wish that one day, mommy and daddy will be as famous as Harry Collett,’” Ewan recounted, causing the audience to erupt in laughter once more.
“At that moment, I briefly wondered if my wife and I were just amateur actors,” Ewan said with a laugh, taking a quick sip of water before continuing. “That’s when we decided to take her to the set of House of The Dragon to show her.”
“But even then, she wasn’t fully convinced by us,” you added, clearly enjoying the audience’s amusement at the story involving your daughter, Elowen.
“Seeing how much the audience here is enjoying your stories about your daughter, can you explain the video that’s being shown on the screen?” Jimmy asked, pointing to the screen in front of you.
The screen displayed a video of you and your daughter, Elowen, sitting at the kitchen counter coloring together. You had set up your phone to capture what you thought was a hilarious moment, intending to send it to Ewan, but it was so adorable that you decided to post it on your social media.
“So, El, can you tell mommy again why you said that to mommy?” you asked your daughter in the video. Elowen paused her coloring, sighed, and responded, “Because I saw daddy putting a ring on another woman hand, so now I don’t like daddy at all,” she said before immediately dropping her head to cry. The audience burst into laughter some with a soft ‘aww’
“Okay, okay, can you explain why that happened, Y/n? Why did she say that?” Jimmy asked.
“Well, as you saw, Elowen and I were coloring together when she suddenly turned to me and said, ‘Mommy, I don’t like daddy,’ so I thought she must have had a reason for saying that,” you explained, shifting in your seat position before continuing, “So I set up my phone to record, but it wasn’t until I showed the video to Ewan that we realized she was talking about the scene where Aemond gets married, you know in the House of The Dragon episode 2 scene” You couldn’t help but laugh as you finished the story.
"I only showed her that one scene, not the whole episode, so don’t worry," you continued, wanting to make sure everyone knew you hadn't exposed a 3-year-old girl to a series that wasn't suitable for viewers under 17.
The audience roared with laughter, and Jimmy shook his head in amusement. "That's adorable! She really thought her daddy was betraying her mommy on screen."
Ewan chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah, she’s still at that age where she doesn’t fully understand the difference between fiction and reality. But I think it’s sweet how protective she is of our relationship."
Jimmy nodded, grinning. "It’s amazing how kids see the world. So, what did you do to make it up to her, Ewan?"
Ewan smiled fondly, glancing at you before answering. "Well, after we explained that it was all just pretend and that daddy only loves mommy, we took her out for ice cream. I think the double scoop of chocolate chip really helped clear things up."
You laughed, adding, "And, of course, we had a long talk with her about what acting really means. But I think it was the ice cream that sealed the deal."
Jimmy leaned back in his chair, clearly enjoying the exchange. "Well, it sounds like you two have it all figured out—balancing stardom with parenthood. And I have to say, it's refreshing to see how grounded and loving your family is, despite the craziness of Hollywood."
"Thank you, Jimmy," you said sincerely, reaching over to give Ewan's hand a squeeze. "We just try to keep things as normal as possible for her, no matter how crazy things get on set."
Jimmy nodded, smiling warmly. "And it’s clear that you’re doing an amazing job. I mean, the way you both light up when you talk about her—it’s obvious that your family comes first."
The audience clapped in agreement, and you couldn’t help but feel a surge of gratitude for the life you and Ewan had built together, both on and off the screen.
"Well," Jimmy said, wrapping things up, "I think I speak for everyone when I say we’re looking forward to seeing more of you both—whether it’s on screen or in more adorable videos with your daughter!"
"Thank you, Jimmy," Ewan said with a grateful smile, and you echoed his sentiments.
As the interview came to a close, you and Ewan exchanged a loving glance, knowing that no matter how big your careers became, nothing would ever compare to the joy of sharing your lives with each other and your daughter.
…pt.2 ? a whole series of ewan being a dad?? or any ideas for dad!ewan?
mae.
let me know what you think about this and thank you for reading 🌟 also a like or reblog/comments are my motivation
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hi lovely!! if you're comfortable writing something like this, could I maybe request poly!marauders where reader who is normally very independent but gets submissive at times, but not in a sexual way? like she just gets overwhelmed and wants the boys to be in charge for a while, but maybe the relationship is still new and she feels too needy and can't bring herself to tell them and eventually they realize?
again, no worries if you're not comfortable writing this, just thought I'd ask <3
Thank you for requesting gorgeous !
poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1k words
“This is deeply, atrociously unjust,” Sirius says as James sits down in front of you, him on the floor and you on the couch. He’s wet and fresh-smelling from the shower. “You never let me do your hair.”
“Because you always act like you’re trying to tear it out as some sort of twisted revenge plot,” says James, passing you a brush and the curl cream you and Sirius had found for him. Normally, you adore this routine, the chance to run your fingers through James’ hair and the way his eyes close blissfully while you do it. You love to pamper him. But tonight you’re not really in the mood. You do it because he expects you to, coating his curls in product with your usual tenderness but wishing you were on the receiving end of it instead. “She’s got the touch of an angel.”
Sirius crosses his arms. He’s leaned against the side of the couch, leering over you like a vulture. Remus is reading in the armchair, and though he’s pretending to ignore all of you, the corner of his mouth tilts up.
“Beauty is pain,” Sirius grouses.
“We should start a hair train,” James decides. “She’ll do mine, you can do hers, Remus will do yours, and I’ll do his.”
Sirius seems to be considering this. You lean down towards James’ ear. “You’re throwing me to the wolves,” you stage-whisper.
“It’s you or me, sweetheart.”
Actually, the idea of Sirius playing with your hair—even at the risk of losing a good amount of it—doesn’t sound so awful.
“I can get in the shower right now,” you offer, only half joking.
Sirius lets a grin slip loose, sitting next to you to plant a smacker on your cheek. “Thank you, darling, but that’s alright. You shouldn’t have to atone for his mistakes.”
You return his smile, doing your best to bury your disappointment.
“I didn’t consent to the hair train either,” Remus says without looking up from his book. “There’s a reason James doesn’t do his own hair.”
“Oi,” James objects. “I’ve got admirers fighting over the opportunity to do my hair, why would I do it myself?”
Remus marks his page, flipping the book closed. “What are we having for dinner?” he asks.
“I don’t know, but I’m famished.” James doesn’t miss a beat, latching onto the new topic eagerly. “We could order takeaway?”
“Or just cut out the middleman and go out,” Sirius says. “Unless someone feels like cooking? Which I don’t.”
“We know,” Remus teases. “I don’t either, not tonight.”
“I could if I needed to,” James says, “but I’m alright with whatever gets food in me the fastest.”
They all look to you. “I don’t much feel like cooking,” you add your piece. Your voice comes out quieter than you’d intended.
“Alright,” Remus says. “Then let’s not cook tonight. What do you want to do, love? Go out or stay in?”
You comb the brush slowly through James’ hair, twisting to define his curls. “I don’t know,” you say.
Sirius turns to you, frowning. “Come on, baby.” He bumps your shoulder lightly with his. “What do you feel like having?”
“I don’t know.” You try not to sigh. “Um, can you pick?”
You don’t look up from the top of James’ head, but you can feel them exchanging looks. They’ve all been a little extra gentle with you lately. They know you’re dealing with a lot. Anytime you try to tally it all up and make sense of it in your head, you start feeling like you could cry. Your exhaustion has sunk so deeply within you that it’s seeped into your bloodstream. You think by now there’s got to be traces of it in the marrow of your bones.
“Hey,” Sirius says softly. “Look at me.”
You do, pausing with the brush held aloft over James’ head. He’s got his eyebrows drawn together like he’s trying to figure you out. “I’m sorry,” you say. It’s not your boyfriends’ faults that you’re feeling overwhelmed; you don’t mean to drag them down with you.
“What for, sweetness?” He sets a hand on your thigh, rings biting into your skin as he gives the flesh a loving squeeze. “Just tell us what you need.”
You try to give him a smile. You really do love him. “I want…I don’t know, I guess I’m just tired. I want to not think for a little while.”
Sirius’ eyebrows come up a bit in the middle, and James turns around from below you.
“Aw, sweetheart.” His tone is as gooey and sweet as raw honey. “Do you just want us to take care of you, angel?” He sets his hands on your knees, pushing himself up to kiss your chin. “You should’ve said something.”
“We can stay in,” Remus suggests whilst James worms his way underneath you, getting you in his lap. “Order takeaway from that Thai place you like.”
“That sounds nice,” you say meekly, face growing warm. James presses rapid-fire kisses to your cheek. One-two-three.
“You wanna have a shower, baby?” Sirius asks you. He looks heart-wrenchingly concerned. It’s not like you to want to give away control like this. “I could do your hair when you get out.”
“Don’t do it,” James cautions you. “He steals our hair to make tiny dolls of us, I’m sure of it.”
Sirius sends him a withering look. “I’ll be gentle.”
“I’d like that,” you tell Sirius, and he softens.
“Yeah?” He brushes a piece of hair away from your face and presses his hand to your cheek. Squishy fond. “Okay, baby, we’ll pamper you to hell and back.”
“I’m going to find the menu for takeaway,” Remus says, prying himself up from his chair.
“James,” Sirius says, not particularly kindly, “you will have to let her go for her to shower.”
“Never. Not on my life. Not at gunpoint.” You shrink as James makes his face at home in the juncture of your neck and shoulder, nose nudging at a ticklish spot. “She’s my darling sweetheart angel.”
“She’s our darling sweetheart angel,” Remus corrects him from the kitchen. You think your face could melt titanium.
“James, please,” you complain. “I’m never telling you all anything again.”
“Careful.” Sirius raises an eyebrow at you, mock stern. “That sounded dangerously close to a thought, and those won’t be allowed until at least tomorrow morning.”
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You overhear Karina talking about how clingy you are and from then out started being distant and non-affectionate towards her and she eventually confronts you and asks why you keep pushing her away, to which you tell her
Over her
Yoo Jimin x reader
Warnings: a little smut in the end (just a little). reader and yn don’t really talk abt it tbh. skipping meals (? idk how to word it better than this).
Word count: 5.4k
Notes: I’m alive!!! sorry for taking forever to answer 😔. I think your message got cut off? so I got a little creative, I hope you don’t mind :). If you do, I can still cut out a few things n stuff. anyways, merry early christmas ig ^^ ps: I also didn’t know if this was supposed to be smut, so I only wrote a little and in the end.
You’ve always been utterly, embarrassingly, completely enamored with your girlfriend. It was obvious to anyone who looked at you for even a single second; you would always be caught staring at Karina with loving eyes, often going out of your way to simply please and spoil her rotten, showering her with kisses and gifts. For you, it was physically impossible to be without her for too long. Her absence made your heart ache, almost as if there were something missing from you. It was difficult to go on with your routine if you didn’t have her by your side. You missed your late night talks, walks at the park, parking lot dates, eating too much junk food together… You missed her, truthfully. All of her.
Naturally, you understood her duties as an idol: being away for shows, events, and photoshoots were part of her life just as much as you were. However, you knew Karina’s time was precious and scarce— which was why, whenever she was back in Seoul, you tried to spend as much quality time together as possible.
Even now, as the group’s busy with their latest Mini Album’s promotions, you couldn’t help but to feel glistening with happiness to have the four girls back in Korea, regardless of them still being so occupied with fansigns, program attendances and rehearsals for their upcoming stages and festival performances. Having them in town gives you the opportunity to join them backstage, which you absolute love; whether it’s the artistic atmosphere, or being able to understand how this industry truly works, with all the engines running frantically in the girls’ background to ensure everything goes as planned… And, of course, getting to watch Karina perform and be the astonishing, all-rounder, talented version of herself was the best part of it all. Anytime you look at her through the big screens, you realize how lucky you truly are— to be able to see all sides of her. To witness how sweet, shy and caring she could also be, once the cameras were not around.
You loved her so much.
“Congratulations, girls! You absolutely nailed it!” You praise the four girls as soon as they leave the stage, breathless from performing at a University Festival. They all smile back, trying to recompose themselves as best as they can, the adrenaline from being on stage slowly running out. You wait for them to calm down, too, before reaching out to give your girlfriend a big hug, in hopes to express yourself through your touches. You mean to tell her how wonderful she had done, but she ends the hug quickly, although her smile still lingers.
“I’m all sweaty, Y/n.” She explains, which you nod and take a step back to give her space. The two of you walk side by side, towards the big dressing room. “I don’t want you to get dirty, too.”
You shrug, trying to hide the uncomfortable feeling that stood on your heart, with the lack of her touches. You understood, though. Karina’s just taking care of you, like the sweet girlfriend she is. So you follow her, without complaints, even though all you want is to jump from excitement and tell her how perfectly she performed, setting the public on fire. Instead, you force yourself to stay still and calm down, laying with the others on the couch as you watch them change into normal clothes and relax.
-
The cafe’s atmosphere is cozy and calm, a much-needed contrast for the girls after a whole morning of practicing at the company. The place’s barely occupied— lunch break is nearly over for most of the workers— and the only sounds that can be heard are the wind’s peaceful breeze and the girl’s voices, engaged in a nonchalant gossip.
“I’m so hungry.” Winter complains, resting her head on Karina’s shoulder. You all chuckle at the sight; she’s too cute, even when she’s whiny.
“Me too.” You nod, and reach out for your girlfriend’s arm, tugging it slightly to steal her attention from Ning’s excited storytelling. It takes a few moments, but she finally hums, acknowledging you. “Love, do you think the food will take long? I need to use the restroom, but I’ll wait if it’s coming soon.”
Karina frowns, looking behind you for a few seconds. After examining the balcony, she seems to think otherwise. “It might take quite a while, still. We’ve ordered a lot, and we just got here, too. You’re safe to go.”
You nod as you get up and excuse yourself, leaving the girls to their own conversations. Their reserved table, set in a pretty well-hidden corner of the cafe, is the reason you’re able to observe their faces from afar, once you make your way back from the stalls. None of them notice your arrival, too engrossed in their conversation to pay attention to your frame.
Giselle, Winter, and Ningning’s faces are uneasy as they listen to Karina’s rambling. Their fingers twitch on the table, and they shake their heads every once in a while, leaving you to wonder what’s gotten them so serious. Trying to understand the matter, you frown behind their backs, approaching the group in slow, unhurried steps.
“… She’s constantly all over me, too. I swear I don’t even have time to breathe without her on my skin, as if she has nothing else to do. It’s so fucking annoying, really. Like, you remember, right? And there was that time when we were all at the park and Y/n was just insufferab—.”
You decide not to eavesdrop on the rest of your girlfriend’s conversation. Instead, you focus on keeping your steps as light as you can, once you turn around and nearly run back to the restroom, ignoring the heavy pitch just forming in your stomach.
You only allow yourself to relax once you reassure your mind that none of them were aware of you listening to Karina’s harsh, hurtful words.
Instead, your hands go to your face, and you try to focus and take deep breaths to prevent the tears from coming. The moment they start, you know it’ll take long to stop. It was one of the things Karina always teased you about: how you’ve always been such a crybaby, drowning yourself in tears for absolutely anything.
Oh, Karina… how could she speak such things about you? You’ve always put on so much effort to be the best, supportive girlfriend you could, with extra care to respect your girlfriend’s boundaries and still express how much you loved her.
It hurt to know she found you annoying and clingy, specially since all you’ve ever meant was to reassure her of your love. Allowing your body to sink into the restroom’s floor, you reach to the ground, hugging your knees in hopes to feel some comfort.
Flashes pass through your mind like rockets, analyzing every single moment you’ve ever spent with Karina. Even if it was the last thing you wanted to do, your mind doesn’t seem to give you any relief, overthinking about each one of her touches, phrases, and actions towards you. Did she even love you? What was she doing with you, then, if she found your presence to be so suffocating? What have you done wrong?
Was your whole existence the problem? The way you acted, your bubbly personality…
The questions, now clearly etched on your brain, did nothing but deepen the lump in your throat, one that left saliva building up in your mouth, making it impossible to swallow. Even the simplest actions were difficult to be executed, just like it was when you were away from your girlfriend for too long.
Despite all, you couldn’t help but let a light chuckle, forcing yourself to get up and wash your face in the sink. You feel like you’re going to collapse if you stay in the cafe. No, that won’t do— you have to go home. Even if it means facing chaos herself.
And her friends, too. They must’ve been aware of Karina’s feelings towards you all along, yet they still let you smile and be all over like a fucking idiot.
You look up, trying not to ruin your mascara and risk having any of them finding out what you’ve just heard. Without rush, you force yourself to even your breathing, inhaling and exhaling in slow movements, focusing on your body’s movements instead of giving in to desperation.
You feel like you’re at the bottom pit, and it fucking sucked.
After minutes of calming yourself down, you dried the remaining tears and got up, sighing as you excited the bathroom. Your hands trailed the walls as you walked without rush, looking for something, anything to provide some strength. Eventually, the walls of the hallway gave way to the open area of the tables, making you gulp. Your legs were wobbly, and you felt too weak, almost as if you were going to pass out at any given moment. Your usual confidence was all gone, and you weren’t at all sure you’d manage to speak to them without stuttering or crying.
“Thank fucking God, Y/n. We thought you got kidnapped or something.” Winter was the first to say, giggling. Giselle and Ningning smiled too, mumbling how you must’ve gotten lost or thrown in a portal to another dimension, perhaps.
Karina nods. “You really took too long out there, Y/n. I almost went looking for you.” Even though her tone is light, your girlfriend’s smile fades once she takes a proper look at your face.
You try your best to smile back at her, hands going unconsciously to your arms, scratching them nervously. You’ve always liked to be the center of their attention; the little moments where they’d ask you for an opinion or actively listen to your rambling… you thrived on them. It felt like they were spoiling you, giving up one of the things they cherished the most to focus on you: their time. Even if just for a few seconds, the feeling of being observed by them brought you a strange feeling of being fulfilled, of being someone important.
“I actually need to go, now.” You mutter, grabbing your stuff whilst refusing to meet your girlfriend’s piercing gaze.
Karina’s already aware something is wrong, though. She knows your body, your expressions, your mannerisms… she’s more than capable of telling when you’re off, much to your discomfort.
“Is everything ok? What happened?” Her hands grab a hold of your elbow, and you nearly joint, throwing your phone and sweater in your purse as fast as you can, to escape from her fingers on you. Her touch hurts, electrocuting your skin as if she were a storm set on a windy, loud night. You couldn’t stand it.
“It’s just a family emergency, don’t worry.” You take a step back, with your wallet in hands to pay for your drink. Bowing slightly to acknowledge the pain you were bringing onto the conversation, you add. “Please keep up with your lunch. I’ll make sure to update you about it soon.”
Karina’s hands rest on top of yours, taking the card from between your fingers and back to the wallet.
“It’s ok, I’ll pay.” Her voice, calm and soothing, is much different from her previous, livid tone. She gives your hand a squeeze, getting up herself. “Do you want me to go with you? Manager unnie will understand.”
The girls nod, their faces also filled with worry. However, you dismiss your girlfriend, diverting your gaze to the ground as you inhale deeply. You’re unable to face her by any given means; you’d fall apart in front of them if you did as such. In fact, you find yourself unable to face any of them. They’ve made a fool out of you for too long, and that single thought is enough for bile to rest in your throat, threatening to spill. You can’t deal with that, not at the moment.
“I mean it: I’m sure I can handle it.” Your muscles tense, and you don’t even notice your body’s backward steps. It was clear you wanted to leave, which was mostly the reason they didn’t pressure further, watching as you hurriedly made our way out.
Karina’s eyes were the most trained, her mind racing with thoughts that left her wondering what had gotten you so shaken, visibly out of place. Clueless, she stared at your frame until you’ve reached the door. Only then, you returned her stare.
The watery look in your eyes is more than enough to make her shiver, gripping her chest to get rid of the heaviness that had installed in her heart. Everything was fine, Karina told herself. You’d soon deal with your incident, and be back by her side as fast as you could, as always.
With that in mind, she relaxes, turning her attention back to her friends’ conversation.
-
Karina doesn’t understand why your distance hurts so much. She should’ve been relieved: you’ve stopped spamming her phone with updates of your day, no longer sending thousands of pictures and videos of things that, according to you, reminded you of herself. She doesn’t have to deal with your constant neediness, nor does she have to reassure you that you were loved, and she missed you. It’s all she’s ever wanted— to not be disturbed at all, being able to focus on work and just have a good time, overall.
Instead, she feels awful; as if something’s missing. Everything feels wrong; she’s unable to concentrate at all, her skin itches and her thoughts constantly linger on you, wondering.
“Hey, Jimin unnie.” Ning looks up from the ground, stretching herself out on the floor. “Is Y/n coming soon? She always brings the best snacks.” Resting on the couch, Karina lets out a long sigh, looking at the clock displayed above the dance room’s door.
“She’s not stopping by to watch us today.” The oldest explains, shrugging. She tries as hard as she can not to sound affected by it. “It’s Nutcracker season. She’s rehearsing until late, most likely.”
“Most likely? Haven’t you talked to her today to know that?”
Giselle’s sharp tone hurt, specially since Karina’s phone was currently burning in her pocket, with a lot of unread messages she had sent you. Karina twists her fingers to prevent herself from putting her hands on her face, in a tired manner. “No, I haven’t. Like I said, she’s busy. We haven’t talked much since this morning.”
“Wow, this is serious, then.” Giselle’s lips turn into a smirk, as she brushes the sweat out of her face. “Y/n’s never missed a pre-comeback rehearsal of ours. Like, literally never. Not even if she had her own rehearsals to attend. Have you ever attended any of hers, by the way?”
Karina grits her teeth. She knows Giselle means well: she’s friends with you, and is simply curious. Knowing that doesn’t keep the girl from wanting to punch the Uchinaga for annoying her, though. With the engines running inside her head, Karina tries her best to focus on exhausting her body, in hopes of having the burning sensation ease her troubled mind. Still, she couldn’t help but constantly wonder what was going on in with you. Why were you suddenly so distant?
The questions clouded her head, making it difficult to focus on the choreography they were learning. It seems like she wasn’t making up stuff, after all: Giselle’s questions made it clear you were different, weirdly so.
Nodding, Karina added, “Yeah. It’s not like herself at all.”
Giselle meant to continue the conversation, but the dark look Karina shoots her is enough to get the Uchinaga to gulp, focusing back on her movements, along with the melody of their upcoming song. It was none of her business, anyway.
Once the girls make their way back to the dorms, Karina decides she’s had enough of whatever you were intending to do. She’d stop by and confront you, finally. It frustrated her, having to guess your feelings, specially since you’ve been dating for quite a while — now. But she’d do it, if you were so willing to be petty. She’d be the one to reach out first.
-
“Thank you, girls. I’ll see you in a bit. I won’t be late, promise.” Karina’s words reverberate through the car, as she waves goodbye to her friends.
Her three bandmates were, as always, more than quick to encourage her to reach out to you, after the distance between you lingered for weeks. Even though it would cost her hours she should be spending in the recording room, they’ve immediately told Karina to talk to you, urging to have both of you in good terms once again.
Ever since you’ve become a shell of the caring, sweet girlfriend you once were, Karina’s been jittery; she was easily irritated and often picked arguments over the simplest things. It was clear the situation was taking a toll on her, in ways she’d never admit. Karina would die before confessing how much she missed your voice, your care, your touches. She’d never admit it. After all, she did constantly complain about how clingy and annoying you were— it was only fair she lived up to her words.
With a sigh, the girl enters your Dance Studio, tugging at the tiny Christmas decorations that hang through the reception area, the doors, and the walls. She realizes she’s never actually been inside the massive building for more than three, maybe four times. Usually, Karina would just wait for you by the car, never bothering to get to know the place you spent the majority of your time, whenever you weren’t attending your classes. Karina mutters a curse under her breath, silently punishing herself for not paying enough attention to you, as she smiles at the receptionist and asks about your location.
“Second four, third door on the left. She’s booked up a private room for a few hours, but they should be near the end, now.” The woman told her, as Karina bowed her in recognition, making her way towards the elevator.
Once she’s walking through the hallways, a big, colored paper with numerous names catches her eyes, standing out in the sea of decorations and adornments. It’s a casting list, and Karina’s chest fills with pride as she reads your name: first in line, cast as the lead dancer. She vaguely remembers of one of your rambles months prior, the low tone of your voice exposing how ashamed you were to confess about your nervousness to audition. At that time, Karina had been so focused on her own stuff she barely gave your topics any attention at all, dismissing them with a few hums until you focused on her rants again.
Now, Karina desperately wished she had paid you more attention. She urged to be active in your life: to know what was happening in your routine, your troubles and whatever was making you happy at the moment. Filled with guilt, the dark-haired girl slides the door slowly, delighting herself in the sight of your perfectly arranged frame, stretching yourself by the bars.
“You haven’t told me you got cast as Clara.” She says, quietly, staring at how precise and eloquent your moves are, even though the music that comes from your phone is faint, nearly inaudible.
You take a look at your girlfriend through the mirrors, trying your best to look indifferent. In reality, the first thought you’ve had as soon as you got cast as the lead dancer for the company’s Winter play was to call her, screaming in excitement for accomplishing something you’ve wanted for so long. But her words were still livid on your mind—which is why you simply shrug, going on with your barre routine, back straightened and arms arched. Once again, it was difficult to act like her stare didn’t burn, consuming you completely, but you reverberated through it.
“It’s not that big of a deal. I only got it because Seowon unnie is injured, anyway. She didn’t even audition.”
“I see.” Karina says. Her eyes examine your body so intensely you gulp, reaching out for your water bottle. She follows your every move, like a fox out for a hunt. “Do you want to have lunch? We can finally have some time for us, then. You’ve been so busy.” Her tone is sarcastic, and you know she’s fully aware of the distance you’ve been putting on between them. Her message is clear: she’s done playing and waiting for you to gather your thoughts and come back to her on your own, as you’d usually do whenever you argued.
Only you weren’t backing up or apologizing, this time.
“I can’t put on weight. I have fittings in 3 days.” Karina frowns, approaching until you were unable to continue your moves.
She looks at your body, eyes searching for any flaws with such hunger, you instantly feel heat invading your cheeks.
“You’re good.” Leaving no space for denial, she turns around and holds the door open, motioning for you to go first. “Now, let’s have lunch.”
-
“Is it something with your family?” Karina is the first to break the awkward silence that lingers on the lunch table, in hopes to stir anything inside you to make you stop playing with your salad and look at her face. It works: you look up, genuinely confused.
“What? No, they’re good.” You tuck your hair behind your ears, clearly not enjoying the date. If anything, your moves are mechanic, hesitant.
If it were any other day, you’d be talking until you had to grasp for air, filling Karina in every detail of your life for the second or third time, probably. She thinks she’ll go insane at the sight of you, sitting idle on the desk, with big, sad eyes.
“Good. It’s good they’re all well and healthy.” She says, then adds, lifting her brows. Even though she tries not to express how irritated she is by the situation, Karina’s not good at hiding her expressions. “What is wrong? You’re clearly different, but keep acting petty and not telling me what it is.”
Your mouth opens in a perfect “O” as the words leave your girlfriend’s mouth. Does she think you’re that immature? She must simply not care about her own words, then. You’re sure of it. “I’m not fucking petty.”
Karina stares at your arms, tightly crossed against your chest, and at your pout. She almost laughs, thinking about how adorable the sight is, but the fire in your eyes reminds her of the current situation. She leans back on the chair, motioning for you to do something. Anything.
“Talk, then.”
She infuriates you. Just sitting in front of you, so sure she’s done nothing wrong, as if you’re the only one to blame.
“You’re really clueless, aren’t you?” It takes some deep breaths to not point a finger at her, so you just let out a dry laugh. “I’m just giving you what you want.”
“What do you mean by that?” Once again, she looks genuinely confused. Before you get to answer, thought, Karina’s phone rings. She picks up immediately, not at all pleased with how you rolled your eyes at the interruption. It’s Aeri, calling to say Bada had already arrived, and she’s the only one missing for them to start cleaning the choreo.
You get up before she has the chance to say anything, with a fake smile as you wait for her to call the waiter and pay for your date.
“I have to go, too.” You say, walking up slightly faster than her. When it’s time for you to actually part ways, though, you stop, unsure of what to do. You would rather not touch her; it still hurts, and part of you was indeed petty enough to deprive her of your touch, after her complaints.
Karina beats you to it, however. Before you register, she seals your lips in a delicate kiss, one you can’t help but melt on.
“See you soon, Y/n. I love you.” She says, before entering her company’s car and being driven away. She doesn’t wait for you to acknowledge the situation, and you’re happy for that.
Huffing in frustration, you make your way back towards your studio, in hopes to keep your strained relationship out of your mind, even if just for a few hours.
-
As much as Karina thinks it through, she can’t fantom where she’s gone wrong. You’ve just distanced yourself so suddenly, and it has left a hole in her heart, along with a lingering itch on her skin that makes her want to scratch her arms until they’re red and sore. She’s busy, and she knows you’re busy, too, but she’s had enough of this. She misses you, and she hates herself for complaining about how you’ve always shown her nothing but love. She took it for granted before, but she won’t anymore.
Her palms are slippery as she knocks on the dressing room’s door, not waiting much until she’s given permission to enter. She’s not surprised to find you alone— your friends told her you were usually the last one to change into normal clothes, as crowded spaces made you breathless and anxious. She is, though, surprised to find you looking down at your hands, so small and filled with sorrow, despite having performed flawlessly not even an hour ago.
You’re surrounded by stuffed animals, letters, and gifts from your friends and family, yet it still seems so… empty. And you know what’s lacking.
The girl standing by the door knows it, too.
“You looked beautiful on the stage tonight.” Karina says, carefully placing the huge bouquet she bought you on the empty part of the table, the one your hands rest. “As always. My beauty.”
You nod, gripping your chair as you try to ground yourself. Even your body navigated towards her; it was hard not to run into her arms and forget how hurt you were.
“I didn’t think you’d come.” You truly didn’t, even though you had sent invites to her and the girls, they were always so busy— they’ve never attended, before.
It’s Karina’s turn to be hesitant — now. Trapping her hands in her pockets, she adds. “I don’t want to be absent from your life anymore.” The statement, all you’ve wanted to hear for so, so long, makes your heart nearly joint. You try to speak, but she’s still immersed in her words. “I miss you. And I have no fucking clue of why you’ve been so distant lately, but I miss your laugh, your touches—fuck, I miss everything about you. I know I’ve been so fucking selfish, and I’ve never realized you were the only one making efforts for us for so long.” You’re still looking at her through the mirror when she places her head on your shoulders, hands playing with your leotard’s thin strap to have something to occupy herself with. “I’m sorry.”
You gulp, looking at the beautiful flowers she got you. Being without Karina had turned you into a mess, but you still feel just as uneasy in her presence. No matter how much you try, you can’t seem to forget her words. How irritated she sounded, at the time, as if you were such a bother.
Your girlfriend was still waiting for her answer, so you take some flowers into your hands, as you ask, hesitant. “Don’t I suffocate you? I’m too much, I guess.”
Karina shakes her head. “Of course not. Where’d you get that from?” Her hands move to your waist, subtly, her light fingers barely noticeable as they brush your covered skin.
“You can stop lying, you know. Just tell me if you do.” Your voice cracks, and it’s enough for Karina to realize how hurt you truly were, by the affirmation.
It comes to her, then, that you weren’t being petty, all over the past weeks. You were just hurt, and needed some time. She feels guilty for being the reason for such feelings.
Hugging you with a strong grip, she decides to be honest. “There was a time… where I felt like it, for a bit. I was overworked, and annoyed at everything. But then you vanished, and… it felt like there was something missing, I guess.”
Her face is all red from the confession, making you smile. It’s a rare occurrence, for Karina to talk about her feelings, and even more for her to confess anything. It’s the real proof she missed you; the girl’s willingness to be vulnerable, even if for a small moment.
You missed her so, so much. As always you’re the first to give in, no longer fighting the rational part of your brain that screamed for you to distance yourself and leave Karina.
“Let’s go home, ‘Jiminie.” You murmur, humming as you feel her hands all over your body, groping and twisting your skin, touch starved for anything you could provide. You whine, looking at her through her lashes. In this love bubble, your drunken state is enough for Karina to kiss you, her sweet taste marked with hunger.
“I don’t want to wait, though. I’ve missed you for too long.” She looks at you dead serious, adding, “Far too long.”
You nod, a moan escaping your mouth when Karina pushes all the makeup and the gifts onto the ground, her lithe hands gripping your thighs and urging you up on the vanity with ease. Once again, her fingers try to get through your leotard, huffing when she’s met with tights instead of bare skin.
You grab her wrists, giggling at her urgent moves. “Don’t.” You warn, turning your head when Karina meets your lips for another breathless, hungry kiss. Her mouth meets the corner of yours, instead. You’d forgotten how much you loved to tease her. “I have to perform tomorrow, and for weeks after that. Don’t ruin them.”
She retreats completely, then. Stepping back, she places her hands up, following your demands. Her body language is relaxed, but her voice is strained, stating how she truly feels. “You better take them off — now. And give me a show.”
You roll your eyes at the lack of sweetness, but another sharp look from Karina and you’re quick to do as told. Her attention is solely on you, admiring your precise moves. You’re just as graceful and beautiful as when you went on stage, and Karina drinks on the vision.
Without rush, you unbutton your costume until it falls from your body, lifting yourself up to let the fabric dangle on the ground. Your body is exposed to your girlfriend’s touch. You’re drenched, desperate to have her after so long apart. You can feel the heat on your skin, as you reach out to have her close once again. It lingers, only deepening with the hungry, messy kiss you and Karina share. Her hands meet your neck, and you gasp the moment you feel her fingers blocking your airways. The dizziness, along with her wet mouth on your chin, then marking your neck as she has her share of you, just as starved. You’re too light-headed to complain about the bruises, being so quick to turn into a moaning, breathless mess.
“I missed you t-too much.” You murmur, drawing your head back as she licks her way down on your body. You watch, starstruck, as she falls down on her knees, hands spreading your thighs with ease.
You take a hold of her long, dark hair, but don’t motion to force your girlfriend’s face into your cunt— you know better than that. Instead, you wait, eagerly, as she parts your folds. Her other hand comes to collect your juices, proving on your sweetness.
“I’m obsessed with you.” She mutters, breath hot on your cunt. Her eyes meet yours, and she’s just as breathless. “Fucking obsessed. Do you understand? This is all mine.”
Without a warning, she licks a big stripe of your pussy, her nose bumping onto your clit without much pressure. The action, though not rough, is more than enough to have lewd, loud sounds come out of your mouth. The only thing on your mind is your girlfriend. Her touches and the pleasure she was always so eager to give you.
“I’ll worship you because you’re mine.”
Perhaps your relationship was built on empty promises. But as for the moment, the only thing that matters is Karina’s hot, warm breath on your skin, and how right it feels.
#sol writes#sol’s works#yoo jimin x reader#yoo jimin smut#karina aespa smut#karina x reader#karina smut#karina aespa#aespa x fem reader#aespa smut#aespa x reader#aespa x yn#aespa x you#kpop smut#kpop x y/n#kpop x reader
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antidote II Leila Ouahabi x Reader
a/n: dear readers, enjoy reading this little oneshot and thank you @taysappho for sending us the request. 🤍🤍
masterlist I word count: 1446
“Amor, have you seen?”, Leila asked, her face brightly smiling at you through the phone screen.
Of course, you had seen it. You had been sitting in front of your phone to watch the UWCL draw and had prayed to whoever might have listened that Barcelona and Manchester City would face each other. There was nothing you wanted more than to play against your girlfriend on the biggest stage of European club football.
“The results of the UWCL draw? Yes!”, you yelled back at her through the video call.
“We’ll be playing against each other.“, Leila summarized the obvious, seemingly still unable to believe it.
You nodded: “I can’t wait for it.“
“Me neither.“
“The first game is in October already.“, you said, checking the schedule on your phone again.
Leilas face grinned at you from the small square in the corner of your screen: “I can’t wait to have you in Manchester.“
“And in December you’ll be playing in Barcelona.“, you added.
“Only in December?”, Leila asked suddenly.
You frowned, turning your attention back to your video call: “Uhm, what do you mean by that?“
Pausing, you watched the background of Leilas video passing by behind her as she kept walking with her front camera focused on herself. You knew where she was.
“Wait, are you at an airport?”
She beamed at you proudly: “Just landed. Do you want a flat white or a cappuccino?“
“No way…“, you said incredulously and then added: “Cappuccino please.“
“Will be delivered soon.“, Leila winked into the camera.
You shook your head, still in awe about the surprise: “I love you.“
“I know. Love you too.“
With that she ended the call. Silence filled your Barcelona apartment with the exception of your heart beating loudly against your chest. You still couldn’t believe that she would be here soon.
You had been together for a few years now and long-distance worked surprisingly well for the two of you but you couldn’t deny that you often found yourself missing her. You both had tight schedules so visiting each other was a rare luxury usually reserved for the winter and summer breaks.
A ringing on your doorbell announced what you hoped would be the arrival of Leila a little later. You opened the door with a grin, making space to let her in: “Come on in, gentlewoman.“
“Thank you. Here’s your coffee.“, she laughed, while balancing two steaming to-go cups and her duffle bag.
You gratefully took the cup she offered you and took a sip. “Oh, it’s still hot.“, you remarked with surprise.
Leila dropped her bag to the floor and gave you an “Oh please“ - look.
“Of course, I know what I’m doing.“, she laughed before pulling you in for an embrace.
You could feel yourself melt into her, breathing in her scent. You had missed her more than you had realized.
“For how long you will stay?”, the question passed your lips without thinking.
“A few days.”, Leila replied smiling.
Relief flooded you in an instant, a few days was more than you were used to getting since the defender made her move to Manchester.
“That’s amazing.”, you muttered happily.
“The club gave me a couple of days off because of the injury.”, she explained more seriously.
Your heart sank at your girlfriends mentioning the reason why the dark-haired woman was able to be in your arms in this exact moment.
“How are you, Leila?”, you asked her concerned.
“I’m okay, really.”, Leila answered, lifting your chin so you could see the truth reflected in her beautiful brown eyes.
“Can I do anything?”
“Well, you can spend some time with me.”, the defender suggested. For a second, she paused. With a mischievous smile playing on her lips your girlfriend continued. “I heard that should help.”
“Does that help?”, you questioned innocently after kissing the only slightly taller woman gently.
“I think it does.”, Leila admitted grinning amused.
“Good.”, you nodded satisfied with her answer.
“Come here, amor. I missed you.”, she demanded softly.
“I missed you too.”, you whispered a quiet confession.
“Yes, I know.”, the fellow footballer responded cheekily.
“Bienvenida a casa.”
“Nice place.”, Leila observed, really taking in your new flat this time.
“It’s, huh? You can see the sea from the balcony.”, you rambled on excitedly, eager to show her everything of your appartement which your lover normally only saw through the small screen during your video calls.
“Show me.”, she requested. No more assurance was needed afterwards.
“Isn’t the view gorgeous?”, you beamed at her once the two of you have stepped on to the balcony.
It was decorated with a few green plants, a small table accompanied by two chairs, but the most thrilling part of it was indeed the fantastic scenery. The sounds of the buzzing city were audible, but underneath all of that you could hear the waves crashing to the shore. While the sight of the sea always mesmerized you.
“Very.”, Leila giggled, she was unable to take her eyes off you. After all those years together, the dark-haired woman was still enchanted by you.
“You’re not even looking at it.”, you protested weakly.
“I see something better.”, the defender countered in a flirty tone.
“You do?”, you raised an eyebrow teasingly.
“I do.”, your girlfriend confirmed, she cupped your face with her long and delicate hands and left hungry kisses all over your face it gave you fuel to your own desires too. Oh, how you’ve missed her presence and her touches. It’s been too long without it, you thought to yourself.
With innocent eyes you blinked at her: “It’s getting kind of chilly, don’t you agree? Maybe we should go back inside.“
“I agree.“, Leila smiled knowingly like she could read your mind.
As you walked back inside, followed closely by your girlfriend, you grinned: “I need to show you the bedroom next.“
“Oh please do.“, she laughed while her hand slid down towards your butt, her finger hooking into the waistband of your jeans.
“Follow me.“, you laughed and led her to your bedroom.
You spend the night between the sheets but wide awake. It was a blur of lingering touches and soft kisses on tender skin. You only fell asleep in Leilas arms when the sun started to rise again.
You decided to let Leila sleep when you had to get up for training the next morning.
Yawning you sat in the dressing room while you got dressed for training. You were basically still half asleep when Alexia appeared next to you, pulling on your training shirt.
“Looks like boyfriend Leila is back in town.“, she smirked.
You blinked at her against the tiredness: “How… Oh.“
Your hand shot up to your neck, covering up the visible hickie that you had forgotten to cover up. You could feel the blood rush into your cheeks and cursed yourself for being so inattentive this morning.
“Show us!”, Patri demanded while pulling on your arm.
Sighing, you let go. She whistled impressed once she took a look at the bruise: “Wow, looks like she missed you a lot.“
“Yeah, no make up could conceal that.“, Mapi agreed, teasing.
You groaned, wishing you could just disappear from the face of the world: “Chicas, please.“
“Is she still in Barcelona?”, Alexia asked curiously.
“Yes, Leila is here for a few more days… She obviously wants to see you all too.“
Mapi laughed: “Do you think you can make her leave the bed for us?”
“Yes, if we’re going to her favourite restaurant.“, you shrugged.
Alexia nodded once: “We can arrange that.“
Before you knew it, your captain whipped out her phone and made a reservation for the whole team the following night.
With relief you left the pitch one and a half hours later and were surprised by Leila waiting for you at the exit. She was in an oversized hoodie that you knew too well with the hood up, hiding her face.
She scooped you up into a tight hug and whispered: “Did they notice…?”
“Of course they did!”, you replied, hitting her playfully on her arm.
“Sorry.“, she laughed.
You grimaced at her: “You don’t look sorry though.“
“I’m not. Next time I will leave it somewhere more inconspicuous.“, she promised with a grin that verged on dirty.
You bumped her shoulder with yours: “We’ll have dinner with the team tomorrow, I hope you can behave for that.“
“We’ll see about that.“, she shrugged.
“Leila!“
“Sorry.“, she laughed.
Shaking your head, you took her hand in yours and started walking.
This girl really couldn’t behave, not even in public. Maybe going back to your bedroom was the better idea.
#leila ouahabi#leila ouahabi x reader#leila ouahabi imagine#woso x reader#woso fanfics#woso imagine#woso oneshot#woso one shot#woso#woso community#manchester city women#barca femeni#barcelona femeni x reader#espwnt#espwnt x reader#man city women#mcwfc#fcb femení#alexia putellas#mapi leon#patri guijarro#Spotify#uwcl#alexia putellas x reader#barca femeni x reader#fcb femeni x reader#woso fluff
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I decided to make a HH AU cause...y'know....anyway.... now introducing
Reset Resort! A Hotelier Vox AU
- you already know, it's a hotel Vox AU.....but not quite what you're thinking. Kind of a swap between Alastor and Vox, it focuses on the butterfly effects of this single change, rather than a full reversal.
- Most things are kinda(?) the same. Except the hotel is not as run-down and quite more successful. As if S1’s hotel started with S2's reputation and building. It's also more modern/sleek and closer to your typical strip hotel. Much more busy with additional residents coming in and out. Think Vegas-style. It has way too many amenities than necessary, and it's actually an enjoyable place to hang out , but the message for "redemption" might be a bit....lost.
- It’s supposed to be a place where Sinners can (lightly) indulge in their vices without risk of falling into a soul-binding deal on their road to recovery.
- In this AU, movement between Sinners/Winners has been proven. NOT redemption yet. With this “concrete” evidence, Vox considers it "purely a business investment" to sponsor the hotel.
- Because of this "proof", Heaven has granted Hell/Charlie a grace period of an extra year with no exterminations, so long as they continue to monitor the process and Hell provides further progress and evidence of redemption.
Vox is there for the start up of the hotel with Charlie. He sponsors her project with his reach and expertise. His personality is much more subdued, his TV persona taking center stage, except for rare occasions. His temper is not as bad as in-canon. AKA, he’s much more fake and corny in this AU.
Charlie is slightly more mature and realistic in this AU. She studies redemption seriously and notes behavioral patterns/is much more patient and careful with the process. With Vox being extremely efficient and taking over the managerial/facility side of the resort, she is able to dedicate her time fully towards the redemption of sinners and being a therapist. She is still overzealous sometimes because she knows that if nobody else will show enthusiasm/push sinners to do better, then nobody will.
- Vox tried to manipulate Charlie very early on when they first met, and Charlie ended up realizing his kindness was just for his own benefit and has been wary of that fact ever since.
- Their relationship is like: she knows he’s reliable and will do everything she asks, but is doubtful/sad that he’s ingenuine. Vox thinks Charlie looks at him with pity and absolutely HATES it, but he still plays carefully so he can do a repeat and build up her trust again. Doesn't like Vaggie for a similar reason. They just think he's another misguided sinner in need. Neither have fully grasped the idea that most Sinners chose to do-evil(which he certainly has).
- Vox holds a contract with Lucifer. What for? Well... let's say that they're on good terms and are friends. They meet with each other once a week (where Lucifer gets social interaction and updates on Charlie).
I already have sketches for Alastor and Vaggie planned out in this AU~
It's less of a full "reversal" and more so one swap and the butterfly effect that follows. This AU has been my brainchild for a few weeks, so PLEASEEE I'd love to answer any questions or asks....
My AU tag is #au: reset resort
All information can be found under there! Until I make a masterpost or something.
Old design under the cut:
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I remember during the making of Tangled, the filmmakers said they had to work hard to design Rapunzel’s tower to be beautiful and seem like a cozy, fun environment, while also making Mother Gothel seem sweet and loveable, if manipulative.
Because, they said, if the environment is too much like a prison, and Gothel is too much like a villainess, the audience wouldn’t believe in Rapunzel as a character. They’d think she was either stupid or cowardly, to stay in such a nasty situation without trying to escape sooner. But if her circumstances seem just livable enough, just sweet enough, that you can see some of the appeal, then you wouldn’t blame her for waiting so long to leave.
Why didn’t they do that with Wish?
Why didn’t they think that relatability through?
Nobody is really feeling compelled to root for the everyday Rosas citizens during the movie. You don’t feel like rooting for Asha’s cause, or even Queen Amaya’s. Because you think to yourself, “why did it take the townspeople so long to ask the question ‘why can’t we just have our wishes back?’”
Asha comes up with those culture-breaking questions, inexplicably, in the first twenty minutes of the movie. It takes the rest of the townspeople about 24 hours to suddenly start asking that, too.
So why don’t you root for them?
Because when something bad happens to them, part of your brain goes, “why didn’t they see that coming, though? Why didn’t they ask questions? That one’s a little bit on them.”
And you don’t really feel that feeling you got with Mother Gothel, where you were like, “Oh yeah, I can see why the main character trusted this villain; the villain really seems to care about the hero, if you didn’t know what she was after.” You don’t;t get that same feeling with Magnifico. Because the whole idea of what he does—by erasing people’s memories and yelling at them and having no moments with regular folk where he’s warm and personal and building trust—is so malicious that we don’t believe the other characters couldn’t see it.
We COULD HAVE believed it. If they’d added in good writing and character moments to make it believable.
When Magnifico interacts with the people who trust him and are duped by him, he’s up on a stage, flashing superpowers they don’t have and then disappearing back into his tower after only granting one wish. He’s not on the welcome tour with Asha. He doesn’t know his own palace staff by name. He’s done nothing to build the trust all the side-characters unquestioningly give him. So even at the end, when everyone’s like, “aw, we wanted to believe in Magnifico,” we don’t feel it. Because didja? Why? Everyone could see that coming.
Meanwhile Mother Gothel tells Rapunzel she loves her most every time she leaves. She laughs with her. She reinforces every conversation they have with the idea that she’s desperate to protect Rapunzel. She brings her her favorite soup as a surprise and remembers the ingredients. She goes to get white paint on a very long trip so Rapunzel can paint. She compliments her strength and beauty—even if it’s backhanded. She calls her “dear,” and “darling.” She knocks thugs out with sticks, returning even after she argued with and supposedly ‘gave up’ on Rapunzel, all to supposedly’ protect’ her. So when Rapunzel realizes it was all an act, and she’s wrathful and furious and grabs Gothel’s hand, we DO feel it. Because we believed that Rapunzel really didn’t see this coming, so the shock stings worse. We don’t blame Rapunzel, and we do blame Gothel.
Just another example of what #NotMyDisney forgot about themselves.
#Tangled#wish#Gothel#mother Gothel#rapunzel#asha#Magnifico#wish hate#meta#conceit Art#criticism#analysis#character development#writing tips#character analysis#animation#Disney#NotMyDisney
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Locked In (1) | Joe Burrow
Joe Burrow x Singer!Reader
Exboyfriend!joshallen x Exgirlfriend!reader
•••
Being in the spotlight isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Yeah, there’s glitz and glamour and getting to live out your dream you’ve had since you were a little girl, but deep down you’re still human, with normal human emotions. Emotions that are completely normal, even when people tell you to never show them. You honestly were doing so well considering the circumstances you were left with. A completely shattered heart, an album that had just dropped (full of love songs written about the person that shattered your heart), and a sold out stadium tour that would take place over the entire summer. You were thriving. Slowly but surely, your heart mended itself back together every time you took the stage. Nothing could stand in your way.
Then football season rolled around and people started noticing that you weren’t in your normal spot, in a suite at Highmark Stadium. Supporting the man you believed you would spend the rest of your life with. Even had the ring to prove it. But it all came crashing down the night you walked in on him in bed with his ex from college. It absolutely crushed you. Especially because Josh Allen seemed like the perfect guy. He treated you well, showed you off in public, spoke about you in post-game interviews, the whole nine yards. You never would have saw this coming in a million years. But it did, and it felt like the worst day of your life.
Pre season wasn’t too bad, people just assumed you were busy. Then week one came and you still weren’t there, and people started to question things. Headlines quickly made their way into the world, it was mentioned in sports news all over the country, and you and Josh had started to trend on Twitter. It was all mixed feelings. Mostly just men that were happy to see you go, the women tearing Josh down, and some fans that were devastated about the split. You never commented on the topic. You figured you’d let it die down, and at some point it would be addressed in a normal adult way.
Josh had other plans.
He’d gone on a podcast for barstool sports, and when asked about the topic he didn’t shy away from lying to the entire world. “We both have pretty busy lives. She was going to be starting her tour and didn’t really have a lot of time on her hands. There’d be times where she’d go days without reaching out to me. I just couldn’t live that way anymore”
You were dumbfounded. Completely and utterly baffled. “Brittany and I reconnected last season when we played the Chiefs. It had been such a long time since I’d seen her. We kept in touch. But assure you, there was no crossover. I’d never even think about cheating on a woman”
Blow number two. The cheating had went on far longer than you’d realized, and right under your nose. You were too busy catching up with Taylor Swift in the suite to notice that your fiancé met up with his ex. “I think I’m the happiest I’ve been in a while. I can’t speak for Y/N but I can honestly say for myself that I checked out of that relationship a year before it ended. I could not physically live that way anymore”
You couldn’t watch anymore. You powered your phone off and threw it to the end of your couch. Tears streaming down your face, your heart feeling like it shattered all over again. He’d just proposed to you in July of last year, the two of you started planning your wedding for the off season. It was all a lie.
You thought about retaliating. Putting him on blast the same way he did you, but that wouldn’t make you feel better. At this point, you weren’t sure what would make you feel better, but you knew you couldn’t be sad over him anymore. You needed to pick yourself back up.
•••
2 days later
You laughed hysterically as you threw your head back. When you realized your management team wasn’t laughing with you, you slowly stopped laughing. “Oh you guys are serious?” You question, dumbfounded. “Absolutely not. I’m not stepping foot into another football game for the rest of my life” you say firmly. “Y/N, it’s just to sing the national anthem, and then you can leave. You don’t have to stay for the entire game” your manager, Ryan, tells you with hope in his voice.
“And what reason am I going to give the media for leaving? That I was a heartbroken little child so I couldn’t stay? That’ll do more harm than good and you know it” you rant, letting out a sigh. “I don’t have a choice, do I?” You question, and put your head down when Ryan makes a face.
“It’s out of my hands. The record label won’t produce your album if you say no”
“When and where?” You say, reluctantly. “Sunday, October 6th, and in Cincinnati. This is the first AFC North divisional. There will be a lot of viewers and attendees already but you singing the national anthem would raise those numbers. The NFL is paying you very well to do this, plus you have a private suite with your name on it if you would like to stay,” Ryan explains, not tearing his eyes from you. He knew how hard this would be for you. He hated even having to ask you to do this.
“I’ll be there. But only because the future of my album rides on this. The NFL literally makes me sick to my stomach right now” you rant, rolling your eyes. “You can’t let one guy deter you from your passion of football. You loved football even before he who shall not be named. Besides, I will be there the entire time, and so will Megan. Megan is kick ass at what she does. All this Voldemort nonsense is gonna be put behind us. Clean slate, Y/N/N” Ryan assures you, and you crack a smile. “Voldemort?” You question.
“Oh yeah, he sucks. He’s lucky you’re giving him the grace that you are, and that you held me back from beating his ass that night” Ryan rants, and you laugh. Grateful that not only is he your manager, but one of your best friends. “But seriously, I’ll be there, next to you the entire day. And a little birdie told me you have some fans on the Bengals. Who knows, you may find a hotter guy that’ll be an upgrade from shit-for-brains” Ryan teases, and you scoff.
“I doubt it. I’ve sworn off athletes. Especially ones that play professional football”
“You say that now,” Ryan winks as he leaves the room, and you roll your eyes, yet again.
•••
Sunday October 6th, 2024
You heard the whispers as you walked past people. The judgmental comments about you neglecting your relationship, how you were the reason for its demise. The awful things people were saying about you, and screaming at you, almost made you want to crawl into a hole and never come out. The worst ones, were the looks of sympathy you got from the women in the stadium. You knew you shouldn’t have agreed to this.
“Ryan, I don’t know if I can do this. They all hate me” you stress, and he’s already shaking his head at you. “They don’t hate you-“
“Slut!”
“Seriously?” You say, with a flat tone. “Okay, so some macho men are just mad that you’re here. Who cares? Y/N, your career is literally riding on this”
“I can get a new label” you retort and Ryan sighs. “Y/N, you got this. You’ve literally dealt with so much worse than this-“
“Y/N, you’re on in 10” an NFL official says, walking past the two of you. You feel like your throat is closing up. There’s a lump that wouldn’t go away. In all the years you’ve been performing for big crowds, this one had you nervous. “Josh turned me into a social pariah when it comes to the NFL. He literally blamed me for everything, Ryan. I shouldn’t be here” you rant, tears brimming your eyes. “You absolutely deserve to be here. And for what it’s worth, I wouldn’t have been upset if you spoke your truth. Damage control is my job, let me worry about that. You just go out there and sing your heart out” another voice chimes in, and you turn your head to see Megan, your publicist.
“It’s time,” Ryan says. “Y/N, keep your head held high. You can do this. I’ll be right over on the Bengals sideline waiting for you to finish” Ryan assures you, as the three of you walk toward the opening to the field. Here goes nothing.
•••
After The Game
You should’ve known that staying at the game would mean Ryan would convince you to go to the after party. Although the game ended in a Ravens win, the team still seemed to be in good spirits. A lot of them were actually a lot of fun to be around. You were originally invited by Ja’Marr Chase, who made a point to come up to the suite and invite you personally. Letting you know that he and a few other guys were big fans, though part of you thinks he was just being nice.
You came in and conversed with him and a few other guys before making your way to the bar, then to an empty booth in the corner of the room. Ryan was mingling with some of the coaches and Megan decided not to attend the party, so you were pretty much left to your own devices. You nursed your dirty shirley as you scrolled through twitter. A lump forming in your throat at the harsh things being said about you.
“You really shouldn’t look at that stuff. I’ve learned that the hard way”
Your head snapped up at the sound of the unfamiliar voice, as the couch dipped next to you. “I hope this seat isn’t taken, though you’ve been sitting by yourself for the last half hour. Not that I was watching like a creep. I promise. I just got tired of standing at the bar” the deep voice rambled. “You’re okay. The seats not taken” you say, a small smile gracing your features.
“I’m just not very popular at the moment” you admit, taking another sip of your drink. “You played really well today, by the way. If you ask me, the Bengals had that in the bag” you say, changing the subject and he scoffs. “Always room for improvement,” he says, sipping his drink. “I’m Joe, by the way” he says, extending his hand to you.
“Y/N,”
“And since we’re voicing opinions, you didn’t deserve to be dragged down in the media. I’m not sure what actually happened, and by no means am I asking you to tell me, but I think it should have stayed private. Josh seemed like a nice guy, but that was a low blow” Joe says, not looking at you, as he yet again sips his drink. You frowned at the mention of Josh, and sank back against the couch. “Thanks, I guess,” you mutter, bringing your glass up to your lips. Joe looks over at you, and mentally face-palms.
“I’m so sorry. I overstepped. I shouldn’t have commented on something I know nothing about,” he says, a sense of urgency in his tone. “I literally came over here with liquid courage, with the intention of getting to know you and I fucked it up by bringing up your ex. I’m such an idiot” Joe rants, leaning back against the couch. You look over at him, a strange feeling in your stomach.
“Joe, it’s okay. You were trying to make conversation-“
“But I could’ve asked like what your favorite color is, not brought up your ex” Joe says, internally beating himself up. “It’s yellow” you answer, and he looks over at you confused. “My favorite color is yellow” you say, and he smiles. “Let’s start over. I’m Y/N Y/L/N,” you say, extending your hand with a smile.
“I’m Joe Burrow. It’s nice to meet you, Y/N”
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logan x stripper!reader demons are infesting my mind rn… maybe he was corralled into the club by Wade and … idek where this was going but i really need to hashtag fuck that old man!
anon i had sm thoughts abt this last night. none of them are organized. this is gonna be a massive brain dump but stick w me here.
logan was in fact corralled into the club by wade under false pretenses. he was told that "the son of a bitch hangs out here" and logan didn't know exactly who they were looking for, but he'll do anything if it means he doesn't have to see blind al going through withdrawals again. so he tags along, only asking need to know questions. but as soon as they're in there and wade describes the guy logan quickly realizes that their perp is the fucking hamburglar.
"my future wife works here, maybe yours does too." wade drops the act, hands on logan's shoulders for all of a second before logan shakes him off.
"c'mon, don't be shy. go sink your metallic claws into some pretty girl …” wade takes a moment before adding, “or guy!” and then wade stuffs logan's hand full of cash and saunters off somewhere else before logan can even say anything else.
logan knows he could just go home, blind al isn't so bad if she can listen to people speeding through answers on jeopardy!, but then he turns around and sees you—strutting up to the pole on one of the stages, wearing nothing except a skimpy yellow and blue two piece set. he's just drawn to the familiar colors, that's all. that's the reason why he makes his way over and takes a seat, albeit near the back.
this isn't logan's scene at all. he's not the pay-for-company type. he should leave before it's too late, before he's noticed.
he was going to leave, but then logan watches you approach the tip rail, your eyes watching some guy below you. logan stares as you dance for the guy, and just as the guy slips a few bills into the waistband of your tiny shorts, your eyes lift and you see him—logan, sitting in the back of the section, probably poorly lit, but you must like what you see because you linger.
the patron thinks you're lingering for him. logan can practically smell the excitement leaking out of his pores, but above it all he can smell you. a scent so particular and enticing that he wants to smell it as often as he can. he wants to smell it right on him. and he eventually gets what he wants when your set finishes and logan can smell that same scent, stronger than before, making it's way towards him.
god, he really should leave before he's in too deep, but his morality kicks in. he couldn't just sit here and free load, watching you work your ass off without slipping you at least a little something. so he takes a few of the bills wade gave him, pretty much half, and just places it in your hand when you stop in front of him.
you grin over at him and tilt your head, taking in the way he stuffs the rest of the cash into his pocket as he stands.
"leaving already?"
and maybe you're good at your job, or logan is more of a pushover than he thought he was, because he somehow ends up in a vip room with you, watching you dance for him.
he's not afraid to admit you're pretty. he understands why people would pay for this. but he also understands that this is your job. that he's literally paying for you to ask him to help you take your top off. he's paying for human contact, so he's reluctant to relax.
until you coax him into it, your voice as gentle as your hands cupping his face. everything you say sounds so earnest, like you're speaking from the heart and not a script you pull out depending on the customer.
once logan relaxes, he's fucking gone. yeah, that's the most relaxed he has felt in a while, and yeah he wants to see more of you, but he won't go back. mostly because he's broke and he has absolutely no idea where wade got that money from.
luckily wade loves to play matchmaker, setting up two of his friends (logan should've known that this would all come full circle) on a semi-blind date.
logan would've been more upset about it if he didn't get to fuck you (for free!) over and over again that same night.
#more on them later#.... maybe#but i fw this#/chats#logan howlett x reader#logan x stripper!reader#logansworld!
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More Neuvillette thoughts, as requested by people in my inbox.
He is a traditional man, and he wants to court you in the proper way that someone as lovely as you deserve. The only problem is that he isn't actually sure of the way humans do so. Sure, he's seen other people do so, but sometimes it ends up in failure and rejection. And he sure does not want to ever see a dissatisfied look from you directed towards him. So Monsieur Neuvillette will head to the library to borrow a book regarding the principles of courtship. (Everyone is sworn to secrecy if they happen to see. Though the Melusines already know who the lucky person is.) He will genuinely start to worry if you don't show signs of reciprocation or happiness so please indulge him, he's trying his best.
Taking him diving. This doesn't really seem like a Neuvillette thing to do but when he's in love with you I believe he will actually consider your suggestions just to please you even if they seem a bit ridiculous. Why diving specifically you ask? Because he looks like an otter and you also want to show him those cute otters in the ocean to prove it. Even before the romance stage, you are probably Neuvillette's first real friend. No one else has the courage to speak to him as openly as you do. And he does not find it disrespectful, no, he realizes that he quite enjoys it. He doesn't realize how lonely he is without you until a mere day passes without seeing you.
Being besties with Furina. If you manage to catch the attention of the grand Chief Justice, you are sure to get the same treatment from the great Archon herself. You may be nervous at first but if you can deal with Neuvillette you can probably see her confidence isn't all that real and something she uses to hide her fears. Regardless just be her friend because Neuvillette is tired of dealing with her. She confides in and trusts the two of you very much. Furina will also let you in on some secrets of the Chief Justice, don't tell him though.
Expect to be spoiled with riches. I mean he is probably really wealthy and you are his lover so isn't it natural for him to treat you to expensive things? Though if you feel overwhelmed by the sheer amount of Mora that he's spending on you just tell him and he will dial it back a bit (just reassure him that you really do love his gifts because he'll probably be a bit nervous that they're not good enough.)
Taking the Melusines out on dates with you and Neuvillette. Both of you are like parental figures to them. It goes from a table for two or a table for a few. It's really cute to see how they eat with their tiny hands, and see how Neuvillette listens to their stories with the utmost seriousness. They will also ask you the questions Neuvillette wants to ask you so he doesn't have to. Also, gently biting and nomming on his pointy ears. Just do it. He's really confused at first (is this what humans do?) but he won't stop you. Moving onto his horns. They are very smooth but I don't think they're hard. You could move and bend them pretty easily which makes it super hard for the judge to keep a straight face. Give them a little kiss too.
Everyone knows this by now but he is an emotional man who keeps his sadness and solitude to himself. Neuvillette doesn't rely on anyone to cheer him up but as time goes on he realizes even the smallest things you do makes him feel better so nowadays you'll have a visitor outside your house in the pouring rain.
#neuvillette x reader#neuvillette#genshin impact x reader#genshin x reader#this is completely self indulgent
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They have a crush~ Momo Yaoyorozu Headcanon
❖ MHA/BNHA, Momo x genderless reader
❖ Headcanon, possible series part 1, fluff, romance
❖ No trigger warnings today!
❖ wc: 850
❖ @kimnamshiks @d0uble0hd0nut ❖ Masterlist ❖
. ⋅˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ ⋅˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .
My first time writing for one of the gals! Inspired by my friend and her love of "Wamins!"
. ⋅˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ ⋅˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .
Momo is such a doting partner lets begin with that however, she is also a romantic who has seen most romance through her rich and eccentric parents, or through cheesy romance movies and fanfiction
She would totally have a little tumblr anonymous blog all about her crush on you long before she felt confident it was more than just a fleeting sensation.
Would totally have little lyric snippets about her feelings for you as posts to go as her status for that morning or lunch or tea time or dinner etc “When I see your face there's not a thing that I would change~” “Oh I can’t believe its happening to me! Some people wait a lifetime for a moment like this!”
Several friends have caught on and know about it, some even send her little memes or romantic posts they think she’d like or relate to!
Or some memes to tease her for her crush as friends do
Expect her to blush and stammer and stutter around you, eyes lighting up if you ask to do something together
It can be work, fun, or just food she is as happy as the first time the others went to her house
This tall beautiful girl is so in love with you, she is total puppy eyes for anything you do
If you hug her she may short circuit for a moment out of complete joy and panic before hugging you back gently
She is not super strong like some other heroes but she does work out and she never wants to press even slightly too hard when she reaches for you
Queen of respecting your space, she strictly adheres to your boundaries and won’t even ask if they’ve changed when you both get closer. So if you start out not wanting skinship as that is something you reserve for people you’re really close with you will need to be the one to bring it up if you change your mind.
Seriously out of respect, she may not realize if you just try to hold her hand or hug her after you’ve gotten closer, she is daintily stepping out of reach thinking you had moved closer unintentionally and she doesn’t want to erode your trust in her even by accidentally breaking your space bubble
A Momo with a crush will slowly gain more confidence as she gets positive feedback from you. Of course, all of it anonymously goes on her blog, and she talks it out with her friends to make sure she isn’t missing anything and to plan her next steps
Bless their hearts, they help ground this romantic in reality a bit so she doesn’t end up confessing way too soon and way too publicly or dramatically to the point it might feel like a staged prank
Todoroki is sitting on her bed absolutely clueless as he listens to her babble excitedly to Tsu, Ochako, Jiro, and Hitoshi. Surprisingly other than his small mumbled words of surprise at relationship things in general makes good points for her and the others by just using logic and his level-headed reasoning.
He is also your biggest supporter of you two getting together because he sees how happy you make her and that alone makes him smile and tell you you have his full support…to what you didn’t know and Momo was too embarrassed and stunned to explain when he just walked off afterward
She can make anything with her body so long as she knows the molecular compound, or buy anything for you with her money. But she is too romantic for that, she insists on learning how to handcraft something for you
Lots of little love notes end up in your mailbox, hand scrapbooked edges and lace envelopes without a name
She moves slowly and lets you realize on your own through the small touches here, words of affirmation, handwritten letters, and small handcrafted gifts (even with bandaged fingers from failing at first to craft them properly) that she likes you
If you ask she will blush and stammer but tell you if you want to know then why don’t you go to the park with her that weekend and she’d answer you then
Like I said she is a romantic, It is clearly a date and she dresses up so beautifully and sets up a wonderful picnic on the grass by the stream
When you get there she’d finally confess unable to look you in the eyes as she plays with her fingers but admits she has liked you for a long time and asks if it’d be okay for her to act on those feelings today
Your hands being held together not only gets sent to the group chat while you two sit together and talk but posted to her blog as she adds a little dreams come true quote to it
Congratulations you have just gotten the sweetest woman as a girlfriend, she is going to dote and spoil you rotten. Please take gentle care of her heart, it's so fragile hold it carefully in your trusted hands
#boku no hero academia masterlist#boku no hero academia x reader#boku no hero academia headcanon#boku no hero academia headcanons#boku no hero academia#boku no hero academia x gender neutral reader#my hero academia#my hero academia x reader#my hero academia x you#my hero academia x gender neutral reader#my hero academia headcanon#yaoyorozu#yaoyorozu x reader#yaoyorozu x gender neutral reader#yaoyorozu x you#yaoyorozu headcanon#yaoyorozu x reader headcanon#momo yaoyorozu#momo yaoyorozu x reader#momo yaoyorozu x gender neutral reader#momo yaoyorozu x you#momo yaoyorozu x reader headcanon#momo yaoyorozu x gender neutral reader headcanon#momo x reader#momo x gender neutral reader#momo x you#mha x reader#mha headcanons#bnha headcanon#bnha x reader
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Hii!!
Can I request a one-shot with veneer and velvet from trolls 3 x fem reader, Where the reader is their childhood bestie and she bails both of them from jail and they’re both like hella whiny and complaining to the reader how bad jail was and the reader just teases them about it!
(It’s fine if you can’t do it!) 💗
Hi!! Thank you for your request! I enjoyed writing this, I hope it satisfies your request!🩷
Velvet & Veneer x fem!reader release from prison
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
You are a childhood friend of the star twins. You grew up in the same suburb as them. In the next house, so you were neighbors. Going to the same school, and how to say, making up a small company of the 3 of you, you became very attached to these two blockheads. After Velvet expressed the idea that she wanted to become famous, you supported her, everything was going well, until the moment you found out that they want to build a career as singers! You, like no one else, knew very well that they sang disgustingly. But, Veneer convinced you that they will practice, and everything will work out. Seeing their breathtaking performances on stage and their performance, you did not believe them, and decided to break off your friendship with them, although it hurt you. You heard their songs from literally every teapot, you were pretty tired of it. And so, after a disastrous performance, after the terrible secret of their popularity became known to all Mount Rageons, the twins were taken into custody. Of course, the first couple of days in prison weren’t so bad, at least for Veneer... as a result, you received a call on your phone, it’s surprising that Velvet called you and not her parents. Damn it, it was you who paid the deposit for them too. “Ugh! prison is just disgusting! They literally fed us slop and gave us some rags, calling them clothes! They treated me like I was some kind of animal in a cage without freedom!“ Velvet's screams rang loudly as the girl actively gesticulated and recounted all the details of her imprisonment with disgust. Veneer, in turn, walked quietly, saying nothing, only sighing occasionally. “It’s all your fault!” - After these words, Velvet slapped Veneer in the face and continued “Who asked you to say anything at all?! I don't think I asked! Because of you, we lost everything! Fame, money, fans, our influence! Are you satisfied now? Mister Justice!?“ Her screams turn almost into hysterical screams, Veneer accepts the slap in the face, but then slowly frowns the more she thinks. "so what? all this was not ours, it was not our merits and we got what we deserved. everything was your plan from the beginning, I initially thought it was terrible." After these words, one would think that Velvet would attack and strangle her brother, but then you intervened in the conversation. “Well Vel, but now you know what it was like for Floyd when you kept him in the bank, absolutely the same as you in prison, maybe even worse... you didn’t have to constantly listen to two huge idiots)” You nodded approvingly to Veneer, trying to hide your little giggles, seeing how Veneer looks away in shame and Velvet blushes with anger, you realize that you really missed these two upstarts.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm ashamed that it didn't wrote out as much as I wanted😢
#velvet trolls#trolls 3#velvet and veneer#trolls veneer#trolls 1#trolls band together#headcanon#trolls 2#veneer x reader#velvet x reader
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𝐞𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞: 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞
pairing: theo nott x fem!reader
summary: theo and you get your happy ever after
warnings: i don’t think there are any! let me know if that’s not true :)
note: here it is!! finally the epilogue is here! i loved writing this series so much!! please let me know what you thought of this chapter and/or the story in general!
!!!make sure to keep your eyes on the extras that are coming tomorrow (and feel free to request drabbles/ fics on future or past situtations in the don’t blame me universe, or questions you still have!! i will be thrilled to answer them!!)!!!
word count: 3.9k
note: not really happy with the outcome of this chapter, but whatever..
previous chapter | masterlist |
"mommy?“ a voice called and your head snapped to the side. "can you give me one of those paper towels?“
you rolled your eyes smiling at his antics and nodded, before you threw one in his direction.
"mate, you know i love you, but please stop acting out your mommy kink on my girlfriend“ theo hit mattheo's shoulder.
"well, y/n is the closest thing i have to a mother right now" mattheo argued dramatically "she takes care of me when i'm sick, she cuts apple slices for me—"
"—we've been on tour for two months" theo shook his head "it's not like you're never gonna see your mum again, get a grip"
"it's alright" you smiled. "i don't mind"
mattheo nodded "see?"
“yeah, whatever” theo shook his head “just get ready, please? we start in ten”
after the concert a few months ago, cursed legacy had gotten their record deal. dave had been impressed by their show, he wanted them to play opener for the rest of the following tour leg.
as soon as the school holidays began you joined them, traveling around the country.
theo and you couldn’t be happier. everything was going great and you were ready to tackle life together.
since the concert, theo had not stopped writing songs and they were only a month away from releasing their second album, soft death.
he was always talking about how you were the muse behind most of the songs. and you had to admit that they had never had so many love songs played (or written) before.
during the tour they had made many new fans, their followers growing while were getting more and more attention. they were already playing a few songs from the new album constantly and about you was a fan favorite. your favorite was echoes of devotion, which theo had written for you. it was the second song they played every night.
“see you later” mattheo took a look to his phone, checking the time, before he pressed a sloppy kiss to your cheek and quickly walked away.
theo rolled his eyes before he turned to you and gave you a long and passionate kiss, before he too took off after mattheo to get on stage.
you collected your things, before you started walking. you already knew that it would be hard to feel normal again once you were home in a month and college would start. how could you ever live a normal life after being treated like royalty?
you took your stage pass and walked in the direction of the tents. you hadn’t seen the rest of the band in hours. the reasons were simple enough. draco and blaise had made it their personal chore to walk around the venues before every show, claiming something about a good luck charm they absolutely needed. they had asked you to accompany them on a few occasions, which you did but quickly regretted after they spent the entire time talking about their hook ups from the night before.
they had already adopted the rockstar life style.
quite the opposite of that was enzo. he spent hours in the back of the bus, or in his hotel room, talking to april on his phone. she had come to a few shows, but she couldn’t be there constantly because of work and so they had decided to face time or text in any given moment. you rarely saw the boy without his phone.
april had been scared that their relationship would not last. she had feared that enzo would quickly realize how limiting a relationship was when there were a few hundred girls basically licking the ground on which he walked.
you had told her that enzo wasn’t like that, but you could still understand why she was feeling that way and promised to keep your eye on him.
enzo had done nothing more than proof the both of you terribly wrong. most of the time he did not even look into the direction of other girls, let alone talk to them.
that the rest of the band was busy could’ve been to your and theo’s advantage, making it possible to enjoy time for only the two of you, if there hadn’t been matt, who made it his personal task to follow you around like a lost puppy.
you loved him, you really did. during the time the both of you had only grown closer, going back to the sibling like relationship you had once had, but at times you wished he was anywhere else.
especially that one time when theo and you were making out on the couch of the tour bus and mattheo came barging in and acted like he didn’t know that he had just interrupted something, before he planted himself in the middle of theo and you and started playing star wars on the tv.
"good evening!" enzo's voice roared through the microphone, after they had come out and played only angel. the crowd cheered. "the next song we're gonna play is about a very special someone. our front man's girl to be exact. he's a very smitten man, so naturally, this is a very emotional love song, feel free to hold up your flashlights.. here is echoes of devotion!"
the crowd cheered once again, while you clapped your hands, your cheeks as red as the curtain next to the stage. theo's voice was always what started the song, he looked just as cheesy as you did, even if enzo had made it a habit to say the same lines every night, you and theo were still flustered about his words.
my love, like orpheus, i'd come,
to tread through shadows, my body numb,
but truth be told, in my hearts embrace,
i fear i'd falter, lose the race.
the music only set in after that. a steady and slow beat that was always responsible for your shiver as it guarded his voice through the chorus.
for i'd turn back, just like him,
my gaze would brake, our future grim,
your fading form, in shadows deep,
my love, too strong, my soul to keep.
the song was balancing right between breaking the crowds heart and animating them to sing along. it was the perfect mix of love and heartache, often making your eyes swell with tears, when you saw theo react the same way.
the song had a special place in both of your hearts. for one part, it was comparing you and theo to your favorite myth, which theo had done knowingly. and second, it reminded you both of how hard love could be, how even loving people deeply could led to hurting them.
it was one of the first songs theo did not sing entirely on his own. the second verse was accompanied by background vocals of the rest of the boys, making it sound almost dreamy and ethereal.
like orpheus, with his lyre's song,
i'd sing to you, all night long,
but in that moment, with fate's cruel twist,
i'd choose your eyes, and lose what's missed.
the second chorus was a little different to the first one, deeper, as theo had said.
for i'd turn back just like him,
the current stronger than we swim,
i'd face the darkness, lose my way,
for one more look, i'd gladly pay
"i don't understand" theo's voice was only above a whisper, making sure no one could hear you both in the treehouse. it was far too late for both of you anyway.
"what?" you had asked, looking up from the ipod in your hand.
"orpheus, that's his name, right?" the boy brushed his hair back, revealing his forehead. he hadn't gotten a haircut in ages, exclaiming something about girls finding him more attractive that way. you had spontaneously laughed at that prediction, considering you were the only girl he talked to. but the boy was fourteen and suddenly very interested in appealing to the opposite gender.
"what about him don't you understand?" you had the same tone in your voice your mother did when she would explain something to you and your brother.
"well, why does he turn around?" theo shrugged his shoulders, as he turned, facing away from you, to continue to paint doodles on the wall of the tree house. "he could've saved her if he had been stronger, if he had loved her enough he could've made it"
"it's not about that, theo" you had mused "orpheus looked back because he loved her so much, because the only way he could've saved her was if he had loved her less. but he didn't"
"i don't know, pixie" you send him a look upon the name, which he obviously couldn't see, your annoyance bouncing off of the back of his head. "i would be able to save you" his simple statement made the air freeze between the two of you, hitting deeper than it had been meant.
"then you don't love me enough" your voice was only a faint sound, but loud enough to make theo stop in his tracks.
without him noticing the irony of the situation, he turned around to look at you, his blue eyes crashing into yours. the softness in them almost made you shudder, asking yourself if the way you were feeling about him was totally normal. you did not have much experience with boys, but theo was different anyway, he was not like them, he was yours, without any requirements.
"no, i think i do" he whispered back, realizing that the quick act of him turning around had come right after you had simply doubted his love. he knew in that moment that it would never take much for him to turn around for you.
maybe it was the quiet of the night, or teenage hormones mixing up in the air, you weren't really sure later, but theo leaned across the space between you, gently grasping your lips with his, connecting them in a featherlight kiss.
there was no sound in the little room. there were only theo and you. and only your lips were touching.
for you're the melody that guides my soul,
through tempests wild and rivers cold,
i'll brave the depths, defy the night,
to hold your hand in morning light.
so here i stand, before your eyes,
with trembling heart, and no disguise,
to say, my love, in honesty,
i'd turn for your like orpheus for eurydice.
later that night, after the concert was finished and the band was saying their goodbyes, ready to leave the stage, you were waiting for theo behind the stage.
blaise and draco came down first, each of them ruffled your hair, before they walked away to find snacks.
enzo winked at you, holding his hand up for a high-five, which you gladly accepted.
matt plastered both of your cheeks with kisses, laughing deeply as you tried to slap him away.
all of the boys (except for theo of course) had grown to be like your brothers, but enzo and matt stood out the most. enzo was like the little brother you never had, especially because of his relationship with april.
mattheo had been protective of you ever since leo had brought you with him the first time at the age of five. he had looked out for you ever since, often joining forces with leo, when he forbid you from doing something.
even if you sometimes acted annoyed at him, you knew deep down that you needed matt, just as much as you needed your organs to survive. he had been (unlike theo at certain times) a constant in your life, you had never quite managed to get rid of. matt had made it clear to you that he wouldn't leave you alone. both of you were everything that was left of leo for the other.
you could see it in the way matt acted, when he would text you the most random things or when he was lifting you off the ground after he had predicted you would miss the single stair in front of your feet.
and he could see it in your face, as you scrunched your nose when you found something disgusting or when your eyes lit up at the mention of ice cream. or sometimes, in the rare moments when his heart ached the most, when you would laugh, and immediately stop, as you both realized how much it sounded like your brother.
it was impossible for either of you to forget leo, if you had still so much left of him.
the cologne was the first thing that entered your nose and just a second after, theo rumbled down the stairs, heavy footsteps echoing over the instruments that were already being played on stage.
he was wearing a white shirt, he had gotten it himself, your name written over his heart with a cursive lilac thread. his hair was messy and a little bit sweaty. you remembered the heat of the stage lights from the night of the concert months ago and your skin burned.
his jeans were dark and loose, you had joked that he needed to wear skinny jeans, because he was in a boyband. you had to search for a picture of harry styles, for him to believe that that used to be a thing.
his face lit up when his eyes fell on you. he pecked your lips, as he threw an arm across your shoulder. another kiss to your hair following.
"my dad messaged me" you said as you walked further behind the stage.
theo perked up at that "will he meet us for dinner?"
"yeah, yeah" you rolled your eyes, uninterested in talking about the boring information. you grinned, as you halted in your step, taking his hand in yours, as you almost jumped up and down from excitement. "we will probaly see a whole lot of him in the future"
theo raised his brows, confused what you were hinting at. your smile grew bigger as you could see the realization set in on his face.
"cadence?" he asked, not quite believing it.
you quickly nodded your head, your excitement resulting in a giggle, as he threw his arms around your body, pulling you close to his chest.
theo had applied to the college months ago. your father had just texted you to tell you that he was in. the mail was only being sent out the coming week and he wanted theo to know. that's also why your father had a lot of connections in the music world and was friends with dave fraser, the guy that had given the guys the record deal. he had worked at the college for the past twenty years, it was a big one, similiar to juilliard, but stationed in england.
while theo would go there, you had applied to many schools close to his (which included, but was not limited to oxford and camebridge). the acceptance letter for camebridge had come last week and the joy on theo's face had been incomparable.
"so it's happening" theo muttered in your ear "we'll both stay"
"i'm going nowhere" you assured, as you intertwined your hands, leading theo back to the tour bus, that would start driving to it's next destination in only a few hours.
"me neither, for now we have seen enough of the world to last us for a few years to come"
"are you joining in?" matt asked when the two of you entered the bus. the rest of the boys were sitting around the table, matt sorting poker chips and enzo's phone was propped up in the middle of the table, april's laughing face on it's screen.
"hey guys!" april smiled.
"hey stranger" you giggled.
"mate, could you please grab the cookies y/n's mum send her?"
"hey, those are for me" you protested.
matt shrugged "well the bus was only for us and i'm still sharing it with you"
you sighed, before you gave theo the okay to get them.
"only two more weeks and you're coming home" april was close to screaming of excitement "it's so boring without you guys. i even began missing blaise"
"hey!" blaise protested, as he grabbed the phone and turned it in his direction, so april was able to see the offended expression on his face.
"yeah, sorry" april muttered "now turn me back"
actually, even if you enjoyed all the special treatment you were receiving on this tour, you couldn't wait to go back home. you couldn't wait for life to be a bit more normal again, even though you were sure that it wouldn't take long before the boys would have their own concerts.
you couldn't wait to watch them grow, but for now, you savored every moment, as long as they still belonged solemnly to you.
"who's gonna start?" mattheo threw the last of the chips down, looking between the rest of you for help.
"i thought you read the rules" draco exclaimed confused.
"well, no" mattheo shook his head "blaise was supposed to"
blaise shook his head repeatedly, claiming to not have been part of mattheo's scheme. the boys began fighting, pointing at each other accusingly.
theo and you exchanged a glance, before you suggested to play a few simple rounds of uno, which everyone agreed on and quickly quieted down.
now everything was finally right and if you could talk to her, you would like to tell your younger self that everything would be alright one day and that she didn't have to be as scared of the future.
a few weeks later, when you were back home, theo helped you pack your things up in your room.
the rest of the tour had gone by in a breeze, and even if all of them decided to concentrate on studying at their respective schools, the band still existed and even dave fraser promised that the career of cursed legacy was far from over. soft death had already been recorded and was coming out in two weeks.
"what's that?" theo asked as he fished a folded piece of paper out of your backpack.
"oh" you furrowed you brows. "i thought i had thrown that away" you shrugged.
"well, what's on it?"
"after i first listened to pixie dream girl, april made me write down my feelings and burn the papers. she was scared that i would do something i would regret" you send him a look.
"okay..but why do you have it if it got burned?" he pressed.
"because i wanted something to remind myself how i felt about all of this"
"am i allowed to read it?" theo asked expectingly "it probably won't be nice"
"i don't care" you shrugged "go on"
theo unfolded the paper, his breath hitching as he read the words you had written. he looked up in surprise and you smiled. "that's—" he mumbled, but couldn't find the right words, surprise and love making it hard to concentrate.
"not mean?" you helped.
theo grinned, before he folded the paper up again and put it in his pocket "i want to keep it"
you smiled and nodded.
and after all this, you stupid stupid boy, you had written that day, you are still the only one my heart wants to know.
you and theo kept your eyes on each other, not one of you daring to look away. you could see every version in him, every stage of his life was readable from his eyes. even that night was readable and you wondered if the was thinking about the same thing you were.
"what was that?" you had asked, your voice raised above the normal whisper.
"what?" theo muttered, feigning innocence. you would've almost believed you had imagined the kiss, but the lipgloss on theo's mouth was telling a different story.
"you kissed me"
"ugh, no?" theo shook his head, crossing his arms defensively.
"ugh, yes?" you outstretched your hand, pointing to his lips. "there, cherry lipgloss"
theo rubbed his mouth in a quick gesture, getting rid of the evidence "where?" he asked, fluttering his eyes.
"right there!" you insisted, fighting back a laugh at his attempt to play it cool.
theo smiled softly, his gaze meeting yours with a mixture of fondness and mischief. "okay, fine. maybe i did."
your heart raced as you struggled to find the right words. "why?"
his expression softened, and he reached out to gently tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. "because... i wanted to."
"okay" you nodded, your voice only above a whisper. "but friends don't—“
"i know" theo had interrupted you. "i'm sorry"
something had shifted between you that night in the tree house, or at least for theo it had. it was like you were the only girl that mattered, like you were the only one that mattered. something about that scared him immensely.
you waited for him to say something. to explain to you what it meant for you, for your friendship. but his eyes were as big as yours and his mind wandered twice as fast. "we are friends" he muttered finally, as if to remind himself.
you nodded, taking it as answer enough.
the years turned faster than the pages of a book, you grew older, stayed inside your rooms when it got dark outside and you and theo never spoke of the night in the treehouse again.
neither of you had known what to say so you rather said nothing.
theo's last words to you that night, replayed themselves over and over again in your mind for the years to follow, even if both of you continued being friends normally.
"i couldn't help it" he had muttered, right after both of you had climbed down the ladder and were ready to go your separate ways.
you smiled at his honesty, as you held back a giggle. you couldn't see his face in the dark, the candle in the lantern you had brought with you had burned down completely, but you had a feeling that he felt the same mix of awkwardness and simple happiness you did.
"will you do that again?" you asked, feeling brave now that he was unable to see your face in the darkness.
air escaped from his nostrils, as he stifled a laugh at your question. "i'm not sure" he said.
"okay"
the air between you was quiet and still and you turned around before you softly walked the path between both of your houses in the direction of the balcony you had climbed down a few hours ago.
the sound of his voice had you stop in your tracks.
"but if it some day comes over me, and maybe it will.." he paused, seemingly searching for the right words.
you listened to him attentively, as your heart fluttered at his implication. it was like you could almost see the colour of his eyes, even if he was standing a few meters across from you, his body standing out against the light of the lantern down the street.
he was standing, his body facing in your direction and simply knowing that he was looking at you made your tummy churn. was this what friendship was supposed to be? or was it something different? was this love? did love really feel like that or where you going crazy?
theo cleared his throat, as he raised his voice so you could hear him clearly over the distance between you "just... don't blame me"
taglist: @7s3ven @madi-potter @shereadsandcries @getosbeloved @mischieftom @wolfstar-jpg @t00thfairy20 @chcrrysblog @aestramjackson @elina3011 @kr1nqu @hopeless-y @mitskiswift99 @fallingblackveils @ahead-fullofdreams @helendeath @schaebickel @chubbychasermattheotruther @punkprincess03 @subparslytherin @girlbooklover555 @sakanelli-afc @cobrakaisb @ellen3101 @simp-for-fantasy @the-sylver-dragon @ess-perspective @starsval
#theo x reader#theo nott fanfiction#theo nott x you#theo nott x reader#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott#theodore nott x y/n#theodore nott x you#theo nott x pixie!reader#theo x pixie#manic pixie dream girl#pixie#mattheo riddle x reader#mattheo riddle#enzo berkshire x reader#enzo berkshire#draco x reader#draco malfoy#draco malfoy x reader#blaise zabini x reader#blaise zabini#april hart x reader#lorenzo berkshire x april hart#april hart#lizzyscursedlegacyseries#lizzysdontblamemeseries#dontblamemeseries#dont blame me#cursedlegacy#softdeath
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ASK COMPILATION: LORE, CHARACTERIZATION, AND THE ONE IN WHICH I RUIN A BUNCH OF PEOPLE'S FUN
As usual, this is far from all of the asks in my inbox but I'm trying to catch up 😩thank you everyone for your patience!
For the record, if your ask isn't being answered, that most likely means one of three things:
I am saving it as a possible art prompt.
I sincerely don't have a very interesting or good reply for it yet!
It's a question I have been asked multiple times/the answer is in my pinned post.
Glad you like them!!
As much as I don't limit what I draw to canonical events, vampirism is so antithetical to DU drow's character journey that I couldn't really envision it, to be honest, but who knows! Maybe I'll cook up some Ascended Astarion scenario someday that is kind of a role-reversal of the Bhaalist DU Drow AU I have going on in tandem to the story.
I'll be honest, this is one of the rare times where I'm really not sure which aspect of DU drow's weirdness this is in reference to. Do you know something I don't? 😅
His masochism is very... Classic, I guess? He's in it for the pain and for the emotional connection, and the process of being pierced wouldn't cut it whatsoever, it's too subtle. The body modifications he has are an incidental result of it, but they were never really the goal.
Also having stuff dangling off his face or body would just irritate him, he specifically only does rings because all other types of jewellery get in the way too much. Pre-tadpole Bhaalist drow obviously wore them by the ton, but only as a symbol of status and because he had a permanent new-money complex🤷 so yeah not a piercing-type of character at all, sorry!
He's smooth from the eyelashes-down and profoundly weirded out by body hair LOL
I don't personally think that whatever Astarion had for a home before would bear my resemblance to it after 200 years - having probably gone through several owners, remodeled, if not completely lost to the destruction of the end-game. I do HC that he used to visit it whenever he could as an enthralled spawn to read his mail, but he stopped after his father passed.
THANK YOU, I THINK? I can't say that isn't a passionate description at least!
I'm honestly surprised that this comes up as often as it does LOL but it's just an stylistic choice on my end!
The latter - for sure. He figured that them dying at each other's hands at the end was a given and took that assumption entirely for granted (and I'm sure daydreamed about it often while Gortash went on and on about political strategy during their dinner meetings.)
;))) way ahead of you and by "way ahead" I mean "eventually and whenever I can figure out when to do it alongside the other 30 ideas I am currently juggling" (but I really do want to make a little comic out of it!)
He used them! Not immediately, but he grew to trust the guardian after some initial suspicion and happily gobbled up those squirmy little things alongside Astarion. Because I made his character on a whim and without any planned backstory, I didn't really put any thought into his Guardian's appearance either, so she's just a human woman with a Joan of Arc look going on who's of no significance to him or his past.
But DU drow did trust her, again not immediately but eventually. It was honestly a big kick in the gut to him when the Emperor revealed himself and it definitely set their relationship up to fail from the get-go.
This is also why he didn't ascend to the next stage of Ilithid power, he just stomped the thing dead right on the spot LOL
LMAO I think Gortash is too proud to chase a tail he can't catch like that
He was probably very overwhelmed by the sudden realization that OH, THIS IS ALL HAPPENING BECAUSE OF ME which naturally didn't come across whatsoever to anyone present since he immediately bottled it up and tucked it away out of sight. However, as the story progressed and DU drow helped his friends get out of their respective pickles he was probably able to justify it to himself as it having been for the greater good - since it led to Astarion being freed from his master and Shadowheart to defying the Sharrans.
As for all of the rest of the ensued destruction and death that resulted from it? Well you can't make an omelette without cracking some eggs, or whatever is the wizard version of that saying. He has essentially turned the entire situation into a net-positive in his mind and sleeps great at night because of it.
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Caller #17
𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: basketball player!Soonyoung x college dj reader
𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluff, angst, 90s au
𝐑𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠: PG-13
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: cursing, talks of tough family dynamics, bit of heavy angst, kissing
𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬: 8.8k
𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: You could easily name 10 things that you hate about him. But when you bond over music and families, you realize there's more to him than meets the surface.
𝐀𝐍: This was not an easy fic. It took me way longer than I planned to write, and the story I had mapped out went in a different direction. I still feel proud of this one, my longest fic yet, and I hope that you will enjoy it too 🥹 This is a part of my very own Now That's 90's collab hosted by me and @mingsolo. Thank you to @wooahaeproductions for reading this over and @hobeemin for making a banner for me at the last minute 💙
“Thank you for calling into C.A.R.A.T radio! What’s your song of the week?” “Bittersweet Symphony by The Verve!” “You got it! Thanks for calling into C.A.R.A.T radio at 526 AM.” Hitting play on the record, the orchestra's melody hits your ears, sending you into an out-of-body experience, your soul floating to cloud nine. The hairs on the back of your neck stand every time the song is played, and you imagine yourself playing the violin, getting lost in the beautiful and complicated sinfonia. Working at the college radio station was your life. It’s the only place to lose yourself to TLC, Nirvana, and Weezer for hours without judgment. You are in your 3rd year of college, getting your bachelor’s in music theory so you can be one of the most prominent songwriters in the world. While everyone in high school didn’t know what they would be doing with their life, you always imagined yourself getting a Grammy for Song of the Year on stage. That is your real passion: creating musical poetry for the masses.
You slowly take the headphones off and set them down, looking at the big clock plastered on the wall. You let out a heavy sigh, sad that your time at the station is ending. You are allotted two hours a day on Saturday as a part of credit for your program. If you had it your way, you would be here daily, listening to your favorite records and writing songs between commercial breaks.
“Hey,” your professor Kim calls out from her office. “Come in here before you leave.”
You gather your things to leave, looking at the station one last time before entering the smaller space. This isn’t her regular office, but it has everything you think you would need: a desk, a comfortable chair, and bookshelves full of books and ornaments for decoration. You have spent a lot of time in here, pitching new ideas for the station and getting turned down every single time.
“What's up?” You sit in the chair opposite of her.
“So we will be introducing a new segment to the radio where callers can call in and ask for advice about anything, and then you can recommend a song based on what they are calling in about.:” She pauses to take a sip of water. “I want you to be a part of it.”
You don’t answer right away. You are peeved that Professor Kim wants you to head any segment. You have never shown any initiative to want to talk to anyone who calls in besides listening to music. It’s just not your thing. You are a loner at heart, and that’s how you plan to stay.
“Why me?” You finally speak up. “There are other people who are better at this than I am. Hell, ask Emily. She has been foaming at the mouth to talk about anything other than music.”
“Because you are who I want,” she shrugs. “I see how you look when you talk about your favorite releases. You go deep with the lyrics and how you can relate that to any part of your life. You are more than the person behind the voice, and it’s time other people see that.” “Well, I am not trying to be the next Oprah or Ricki Lake,” you scoff. I just want to play music, write my songs, and do whatever I need to do for the class.”
“No one said you would be the next talk show anything,” Professor Kim retorted. “This will be considered a project, and it’s worth 20% of your grade. Plus, when you are in the industry and have sessions with the artists about the song's lyrics, don’t you need to talk to them about their life and what they need? Think about that.” You nod, feeling defeated because you know you can’t talk your way out of this. You know she is right, but you will never admit it. “Plus, it’ll be a good idea to get out of your shell and work on those social skills,” she says. “We will start in a couple of weeks, so get your mind ready because before you know it, you will be there.” You nod and leave the office, your stomach grumbling loudly as you put your headphones on and listen to the latest Backstreet Boys release. It’s a quarter past seven, and dusk officially sets in the sky as you walk across campus. Working at the radio station is the highlight of your week, as you can’t play music loud at your dorm without others complaining. Fortunately, your dorm is set where you have your own space, but the walls are thin, and you can hear everything. You considered buying noise-canceling foam to cover your door but were told it was “against” the rules. Whatever. Your stomach rumbles again, and you are determined to get a burger and fries in your stomach and drink an Oreo milkshake. You cross the street, open your bag, and grab your wallet before being met with a screeching halt from a car in front of you, its headlights blaring in your eyes. “What the fuck?” You mouth at the driver. The driver pokes his head out the window, and you instantly recognize him as Soonyoung, the star point guard of the basketball team. His black Jeep is crowded, full of guys and girls, with Usher blasting through the speakers. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t paying attention,” he waves. “Yeah, no shit,” you retort, walking to the end before the car pulls off. Jeers and boos could be heard, but you could care less. People like that always get in your way no matter what. You avoid people like that as much as people, as you don’t want to be mixed in with that crowd. Soonyoung will eventually go pro and live the NBA life, whereas you will be on the stage accepting awards, with millions of people cheering your name.
The segment started as planned, and you sat and listened to every caller asking for advice. Most of them wanted advice on how to ask someone out for a date, makeup, and things you didn’t care about. The only thing that made it worth it was you got to pick the music to go with the advice, which allowed you to show off your taste in music, from Britney Spears to Mandy Moore, Usher, Sugar Ray, etc. It made the time go by faster as well. You look through the glass, and Professor Kim gives you a thumbs up to take the last call. Letting out a sigh of relief, you let the call ring a few times before you answer. “Welcome to C.A.R.A.T radio. You are lucky caller number 17. What’s on your mind?” “H-hello?” a tenured male voice booms through the speakers. You groan, fighting the urge to roll your eyes. “You’ve reached C.A.R.A.T radio! What’s on your mind?”
“Hey. You can use this line to ask for advice, right?”
“Yep,” you say, a bit annoyed. “Whatcha got?”
There is a lengthy pause, your fingers tapping dramatically on the soundboard. You raise an eyebrow at the professor, who shrugs and walks out of your view. You hear shuffling in the background, followed by what sounds like something being sipped from a cup.
“S-sorry, I am a bit nervous,” he apologizes. “It’s my first time calling in.”
“It’s alright,” you reassure him. “I know how it is. How can I help?”
“So I already have this path carved out for me by my family and everyone who cares about me. Sports is all I have known all my life, and I have worked very hard to get here.” He stops for a brief second. “Everyone expects me to act like this all-star college boy, and no one ever talks to me about anything else than sports, and I am starting to hate it.”
“Do you mind telling me what kind of sports you’re in?”
“I play ball.”
“Okay, that's good. Well, what is it that you want?”
“I’m tired of being what everyone wants me to be: this golden retriever everyone loves. I just want to be me.” You understood how he felt. Maybe not in sports, but people pushing you to be something you’re not. You come from a family of doctors and lawyers who expected you to be the same. “Get good grades so you can get into an Ivy League school” is all you heard growing up. When you were seven, you expressed interest in music, sitting in front of the family piano on Christmas and playing Jingle Bells, which you learned on your own. Your parents cared for a while, putting you in piano lessons and taking you all over the state for recitals. They figured if you kept this up until high school, it would look good on college applications, but nothing that they took you seriously for. It wasn’t until you learned how to play the guitar in secret that you fell in love with how the strings strummed against your fingers that you realized that your passion is music. Thanks to your choir teacher, you had a good voice and kept it in tune while practicing writing music. You soon sang in front of the school, getting high praise from people all over for your voice and how you would “make it big one day.” Your parents insisted that it was just a phase and that eventually you would become a doctor and make a “real” living. You were determined to prove them wrong by applying to one of the best music schools and getting in on a full ride. You did that, but it came with a cost: being cut off by everyone in your family but your grandparents. They believed in you from the beginning and made sure you were okay. You will pay them back in tenfold one day. “Hello?” the deep voice cut through your thoughts. “Y-yeah, sorry,” you snap back into focus. “Do you want my advice?” “Yeah, I do,” you hear him clear your throat. ‘I think you should be who you want to be. It may feel a little different at first, but eventually, you will be happier being yourself.” “I mean…” he pauses for another second. “How do I go about that? How do I show people the real me?” “Hmm,” you think out loud. “Why don’t you try easing into it? Start a random conversation about something you are interested in that no one knows about. Gauge their reactions, and if they treat you weirdly, then start making new friends. It might be a little harder with your family, but they will come around. But either way, it’s exhausting having to hide yourself at the time. It’s the 90s and a new era!” “Yeah,” he says slowly. I’ll try that.Thanks.” “No problem!” You say. “Check out this song that’ll hopefully speak to your heart. This is me signing off on CARAT Radio, 800am.” You played “You Gotta Be” by Des’ree, a personal favorite, closing out the end of your segment. Admittedly, it wasn't as bad as you thought it would be. Sure, some questions were annoying, but it allowed you to pass on music to people and help them get over whatever. You can’t call that a total loss. You push the mic to the side and leave the room, checking in with your professor before leaving. “Great job,” she leaned back into her seat. “You were well-spoken and composed, and the music selections were excellent. Have you thought about being a radio DJ?” “NO,” you snort. “I want to be more behind the scenes, writing songs and getting Grammys.” “Okay, okay,” Professor Kim chuckles. “But don’t rule it out. You are a natural at it.” You nod and head out the door with a small smile. Getting complimented about your work feels good, but you rule out being a radio DJ. You deal with people if you have to, but you prefer to have time for yourself a lot of times. You’re just introverted like that. However, that last call was in the back of your mind. You just want to live and succeed at your dream job. It was nice knowing someone out there felt the same way you did.
Before you knew it, a few weeks had passed, and you had secretly liked doing the segment every Saturday, talking to people from different backgrounds and listening to their troubles. You had a song for every call, and you bragged to your professor at the end of your shift that you had impeccable taste. The analytics showed that more people were tuning in during your segment than at any other time on the radio. Not gonna lie; it stroked your ego quite a bit.
The mystery guy called in on Saturdays, ironically being caller #17 every time. He would call and ask for advice about getting his grades up, coming out of his comfort zone, trying new things, etc. You got to know him a little, see how he solves problems, and see his sense of humor. You have no idea what he looked like, but you imagined he was just your type, like a Keanu Reeves, Theo Mizuhara, or Merlin Santana. Is it crazy that you sometimes daydream about a man you never met?
Today was the last day of the advice segment, and everyone called in with their usual advice and well wishes. Like clockwork, the mystery guy was caller #17. His breathing was labored when you answered, followed by a clunk of metal hitting the floor. “Welcome to C.A.R.A.T radio. You are lucky caller number 17. What’s your damage?”
“H-hey.” You know it was him; the sound of his voice was familiar to you. You shift in your seat, sitting straight and placing your elbows on the desk. You try to keep a poker face, your professor watching you with curious eyes. “Hey there,” you clear your throat. “How can I help?” “I heard today is the last day to ask for advice,” he says. “I can’t say I won’t miss calling and hearing your voice every Saturday.” “Oh yeah?” you chuckle. “ That’s good to know. Well, what is the last piece of advice that I can give you?” “So, there is this girl,” he starts. “I really like her. She’s cute, a bit of a hard ass, and I really like her mind. She’s not like anyone that I’ve met. How do I ask her out?” “Does she know you exist?” “Yeah. I almost ran into her once, but we talked a lot.” “Ah. Do you think she might like you?” “I-I’m not sure,” he stutters. “We get along and everything and we have some things in common. I just don’t know if she would be into me.” “Okay, well, it wouldn’t hurt to ask her out? The worst that can happen is that she says no; at least you’d know.” “Yeah,” he sighs. “I’m nervous as hell, that’s all. Have you dated anyone before?” You are taken aback, your professor raising her eyebrows through the glass. You nod, licking your lips before responding. “I’ve dated here and there,” you say slyly. “It wasn't anything serious. What about you?” ‘Um, yeah, I have,” he snorts.
“Well, there you go then, tiger.” You’re clearly entertained by this conversation. “Remember how you felt when you asked the other girls out, and apply that same confidence to this girl. You never know. She might say yes.” “Okay, I will take your word for it. Thank you.” “Not a problem!” You beam. “Here is the last song I leave you with: ’ 4-page letter’ by Aaliyah. Have a good night, ya’ll.”
You play the final track of the night, setting down the headphones while Professor Kim claps her hands in applause. You roll your eyes playfully, pushing your chair onto the desk and exiting the booth. You feel light as a feather, dopamine taking over your body as you meet your professor in her office. “Great job,” she smiles. “That wasn’t so bad, was it?” “Maybe,” you plop down on a chair. “It was fun giving out music suggestions.” “Mhmm,” she nods. “Well, get out there and enjoy your Saturday. I will see you in class on Friday.” You grab your things and leave the station, your stomach rumbling and your mouth parched. It’s after 8, and the nearest thing open is the local pizza joint with the best pepperoni pizza with the cheesiest cheese you’ve ever had. You go there often, and the owners, Dante and Gabriella, get your order ready before you sit down. “The usual?” they always ask, knowing that you are a creature of habit. Aside from your grandparents, they were the closest thing to family to you, always making sure your pizza was hot and crispy with a tall cup of Coke to go with it. They asked about your studies, and Gabriella always asked when you’d get a boyfriend.
“Ah, stop it, amore mio,” Dante jokingly shushes her. “She has all her life to find the love of her life.”
More people started coming in, and they left you to your food and your walkman. You gleefully put Parmesan cheese over your pizza, taking the first bite and feeling instant gratification. A slice of heaven, literally. You take your headphones on, listening to Kurt Cobain croon on Nirvana’s Something In The Way. The “Nevermind” album got you through some tough times, especially when your family cut off communication with you. It hurt you and made you feel isolated and misunderstood. On the outside, your mom and dad put on this persona of being open-minded and willing to do anything for the family. Why were you the exception? You feel the tears well up, and you get yourself together before people start to notice, eating the rest of your pizza before you call it a night. You look around, seeing people on dates or hanging out with their friends, and you miss that. You had friends back home, but you all split up before you went to college. Who knows what their lives are like now. It’s not like you are visiting home anyway. You clean up your mess and walk into the bathroom, relieving yourself and washing your hands before returning to your dorm. You looked at yourself in the mirror: your jean jacket covered your black button-up shirt, shorts, and stockings underneath. Your eyes were slightly red, a contrast from your fresh face. Stifling a yawn, you leave and wave goodbye to Dante, opening the side door and bumping into someone in the process. You look up, facing Soonyoung, his cheerful eyes meeting yours. “We gotta stop meeting like this,” you mutter, backing up and adjusting your jacket. “Yeah, we shouldn’t,” he responds, opening the door to let you out. Your head snaps up, half expecting him to not hear you. You rake your fingers through your hair, walking out of the restaurant. He’s a handsome guy, you can admit that, with his fresh, faded haircut and trendy clothes. You get why he is popular with everyone. “I’m sorry for almost hitting you with my car the other day,” he calls out. “It’s alright,” you turn around. “Just don’t make it a habit.” “Alright.” He chuckles and goes inside, and you speed walk to your dorm. Did I just flirt with him? You think to yourself. What the fuck was that? You aren’t even interested in Soonyoung in that way. You two are the two opposites of each other. You’re clearly losing your mind.
The cool air calms you down, and the slight breeze underneath the moonlight keeps you at bay until you get to your building. It’s Saturday night, and everyone’s out; the only sound being heard is your boots hitting the tiled floor as you walk down the hallway to your dorm. Unlocking your door, you notice an envelope tucked underneath it. You sit on the bed, open it, and pull out a letter. I know this isn't a four-page letter, but I like you. You’re funny, have good jams, and are down to earth. Did I say that you’re cute? I like talking to you every Saturday and don’t want it to stop.
I want to take you out to a concert on Friday. I’ll pick you up at 4 at your dorm. I know you've said yes if you’re there when I arrive. —Caller #17
“What do you think of this?” Your former roommate and good friend, Nikki Prince, holds up a black leather jacket in your size. You asked her to go shopping with you for an outfit for tomorrow's impending date, and you needed another set of eyes. She majors in architecture and design but models on the side thanks to her striking looks. A tall, tanned skin and green-eyed beauty, she now lives with her much older chef boyfriend, Caelan, but whenever you need her, she’s always there. She’s French, stylish, and brutally honest. You loved that about her. “I dig that,” you take it from her and try it on. It fits you just right. It would be chilly, so you bought new boots, a white shirt, and black jean shorts to wear with black stockings underneath. You wanted to be comfortable as you would be on your feet all night.
“Are you sure about this date?” Nikki’s foreign accent comes through. “How do you know this guy isn’t some serial killer? We’ve all seen Scream.” “Gee, thanks, mom,” you roll your eyes. “If he tries anything with me, I’ll just show him the moves I learned from the YMCA.”
“I’m serious. This is risque for you, no?” You shrug, slowly taking off the jacket and heading to the cashier. “I get your point, and if anything happens, I can defend myself. But I have a feeling that it won’t happen.” You greet the cashier and pay for the jacket. “I’ll call you before I leave and tell you about it the next day. Deal?” Nikki nods, and you both walk out of the store, satisfied with what you bought. The mall is busy for a Thursday night, with young adults frolicking at stores like Rave and Wet Seal, looking for the latest fashion trends. The mall isn’t really your scene, as you prefer to thrift shop for your clothes. You have been lucky to find some hidden gems there, especially since you are on a limited budget. Nikki, however, said it was a special occasion, and you quote, “You are not going on a date in someone else’s vêtements.”
You stop at Auntie Anne’s, buying a massive pretzel with cheese on the side, while Nikki opts for a small lemonade. You offer her a piece, which she declines, saying her boyfriend, Caelan, will make her dinner later. “How is that going, by the way?” You sit down at a table. “It’s going good,” she enthuses, raking her fingers through her long black tresses. “He’s so mature and sophisticated. Imagine not having to cook and clean after a man and have good sex.” “Well, yeah, he’s about six years older,” you remark. He better know a thing or two if he wants to keep his model.” Nikki gloats as you finish your pretzel, talking about the elaborate French dishes her boyfriend makes for her and how he worships the ground she walks on. Since you’ve known her, she has always been opinionated and refused to associate with people within your age group. Whenever you see her in the hallways, she always talks with teachers or ignores the lustful looks of college boys. You two got on well because you were roommates, and both were Scorpio risings. You understood each other. “Oh shoot, I better head back to the flat,” Nikki says, looking at her watch. Caelan is going to be home soon, and he is making steak frites tonight.”
“Yeah, I gotta head to the dorm anyway. Early class tomorrow.”
You walk out of the mall into the chilly night air. She offers you a ride home, and you decline at first, saying that you will walk as it's pretty close. But a slight wind blows, bringing chills down your spine.
“Wait,” you shout after her. “I’ll take that ride.”
The ride was short and quiet, your mind occupied with your date with this mystery stranger. Nikki was right, you don’t know him, and he could be this crazy guy. But you’re also excited; the butterflies haven’t left your stomach since Saturday. You feel like you know him, and you don’t even know his name. He is just caller #17.
She pulls up to your building, and you hug her, preparing to run inside and shower. You know Nikki is still worried and means well, even if she sometimes acts like an overbearing old sister.
“Come over tomorrow at two if you can,” you announce. “You can help me get ready and meet my date in case anything goes crazy.”
“Alright,” Nikki seems relieved. “I’ll be there.”
You shut the door and shout your goodbyes before sprinting inside.
“Love you!”
“Yeah, yeah!”
The next day went fast, like a blur. You slept past your alarm and woke up after twelve, making you two hours late.
“Fuck, fuck, FUCK,” you shout as you scrambled out of bed and tripped over a blanket. You throw on a pair of jeans and an oversized sweater from the University, your hair in a wild ponytail as you brush your teeth and high-tailed it out the door. You ran to class, forming an apology along the way, your heart beating out of your chest. You are met, however, with a closed door and a white paper plastered on the door:
NO CLASS TODAY. ENJOY YOUR WEEKEND.
“Really?” You huffed, leaning against the wall. It’s not like you are late for class; your alarm was
set despite you being up late last night. But whatever, fuck it. You aren’t about to let this ruin your day.
The leaves flow softly with the wind as you walk back to your dorm, the sun playing hide and seek in the clouds. All you can think about is tonight and what concert you are going to. Maybe it’s a huge concert, and that’s why he is picking you up early… or perhaps it’s a local indie band at a bar. Your mind runs with endless possibilities, excitement pumping through your veins. You aren’t a hopeless romantic or a love-at-first-sight kind of person, but something about this person makes you feel good… like you finally have someone who can relate to you on some level. Granted, you have only talked with him on the phone, but you have a gut feeling and are rarely wrong about these things. You finally return to your dorm and take a well-needed shower, washing and detangling your hair with much-needed privacy. Your dorm has shared showers; you usually take them when everyone is asleep at night. Fortunately, there were only a few people, allowing you to have time for yourself. You allow yourself to think of the water running down your body as him, his hands caressing your body, his lips maybe touching yours— “Is anyone in here?” You snap out of your daydream quickly, and the water turns cold right on queue. “Y-yeah?” “I am here to clean the showers,” a woman’s voice calls from the door. “O-okay, give me a second.” Cursing silently, you quickly step out and dry yourself, throwing on your robe and grabbing your shower caddy before exiting the bathroom. You are met by an older woman wearing a shirt representing your college and sweats, with cleaning supplies in tow. “You were in there for a while,” she remarks as she sets out the wet floor sign. Do you have a hot date tonight?” “Something like that,” you shrug. You walk back to your room, and to your surprise, Nikki is outside your door. “You’re early,” you remark, unlocking the door. “Yes, I know,” she said. “But we will need more than two hours to get yourself right.” “You act like I can’t dress myself,” you scoff. “I just wanted your company, that’s all.”
“Oh yeah? Mon ami, when was the last time you changed your makeup?” You open your mouth to rebuttal but close it immediately. You hate to say it, but Nikki’s right. It’s not like you are going anywhere besides school, the music store, and the pizzeria. “Exactly,” Nikki says, setting her stuff down on her bed. “I went and got you makeup close to your teint, just in case.” She pulls out brand-new makeup from Revlon from mascaras, concealers, powders, and assortments of lipsticks of my choosing. She also bought nail polishes, saying it was time to add some color to your life. As much as you want to roll your eyes at her, she is right. As harsh as Nikki seems sometimes, she has a big heart and always looks out for you when you least expect it. You know a thing or two about style, but she takes it to a whole different level and isn’t shy about giving advice on it. You appreciate her so much. Being honest with yourself, you are nervous as hell. You have had crushes before, but you have never been pursued like this, where someone likes you enough to ask you out formerly, even if it was via a note. This person cares about your mind or seems to. You aren’t sure how to feel; you want to be excited and have a good time, but you have a wall up for a reason. You don’t want to be disappointed again like your family has. You figured if the people you love the most can abandon you like that, there is no hope for you out there. You lived with that hard truth for a long time, and you were content with that. But god, this guy has you curious. “What’s on your mind?” Nikki finishes with your makeup and hair, gazing at you through the mirror. “Butterflies in my stomach are killing me,” you grimace. “I can’t believe I am even doing this.” “Oh, relax,” she blows a raspberry. “You always do this thing where you talk yourself out of things you deserve. Stop that. D'accord? “Yes, mother,” you tease. She sucks her teeth, and you get dressed, putting on the new clothes you bought and your black leather boots. Checking out your appearance, you are satisfied with your look, and Nikki gives you a thumbs up while she cleans up. Knock, Knock! You look at the door, the butterflies fluttering deeper in your stomach. You look in the mirror one last time as Nikki opens the door, a brief silence followed by a heart chuckle. “Mon ami, your date is here.”
You see him, and you're stunned. It dawns on you why he’s here, and you feel your heart drop all the way to your ass. This has to be some kind of joke. “Soonyoung? What are you doing here?” He walks more into your view, wearing a grey jean jacket with matching pants. His right hand is in his pocket, and he has a small bouquet of irises in his other hand. “I’m here to take you to the concert?” Nikki is behind him, trying to keep her composure and mask her giggles. Of all the people you thought would show up, Soonyoung was the LAST person on your mind. This is the person who was calling in every Friday and wanting to talk to you? Yeah fucking right. “What happened?” you accost him. “Did you lose some bet, and you had to ask me out? Or do you feel bad for almost hitting me with your car?” “No?!” he scoffs, clearly offended. “I mean, yes, I feel bad about almost hitting, but no one dared me to do anything. Do you think I am that kind of person?” “Well, yes.” You wish you could take back what you said, but it was too late. You knew you hurt his feelings, the crestfallen look on his face saying it all. “This was a mistake,” he sighs dejectedly. “Sorry, I wasted your time.” He handed Nikki the flowers and walked away, the air feeling thick and awkward. You couldn’t even look at her in the eyes. You knew you fucked up. “Well, that was awkward,” you huff. “And shitty.” You raise an eyebrow at her, and she stares you down. You don’t want to feel worse than you already do, and Nikki isn’t helping. “Honestly, I think the guy was telling the truth,” Nikki surmises. “He looked like a sad puppy.” You think about this caller #17 guy who would call in every week and share his thoughts with you about everything, with you having to do very little. You think about how scared he felt about being his true, authentic self and how much courage it probably took to ask you out. You know you are a tough cookie to crack and understand better than anyone how it feels to go against the grain and be who you are. “I fucked up Nik,” you slump on your bed. “Yeah, you did.” God, you hate her bluntness sometimes, but she’s right. You need to go find him and make this right. “Do you think he’s still here?” you ask, sitting up and grabbing your purse. “He couldn’t have left that fast.” “Only way to find out is to get off your ass and find him,” she says, pulling your arm. “Go find your guy.” You both rush out of your dorm, jogging down the hallway and out of the building, looking for a silhouette of him. You were scared you missed him and felt defeated, not seeing any sight of him anywhere. Surveying the area one last time, you noticed a black Jeep peeling out of the parking lot. It stops at the stop sign, the second to last car to go. This is your only chance. “WAIT!”
You sprint towards the car, barely meeting him as he is about to turn.
“STOP,” you exhale, relieved that you caught him. “Don’t go.” Soonyoung steps out as you rest your hands on the hood of his car, trying to catch your breath. He touches your arm, his hands soft as silk, sending shocks throughout your body.
“Are you okay?” He asks, taking a good look at you.
“Aside from me about to pass out, I’m good.” You take a deep breath. “Listen. I’m sorry. I was a jerk and an asshole and—”
“MOVING YOUR FUCKING CAR!”
A middle-aged woman leans out of the window and gives you the bird, followed by a slew of car horns beeping in annoyance behind you and Soonyoung.
“Fuck,” Soonyoung curses, realizing the amount of cars behind him. “Get in the car.”
You both get in the car and drive off from the angry drivers, pulling into the nearest gas station. You sit with your hands in your lap, this weight of regret sitting on your chest and guilt eating you from the inside. You look at him, and he seems surprisingly relaxed as if you didn’t reject him
not even thirty minutes ago.
“I’m going to get some gas,” he announces. “Wait here.”
You watch him walk inside to pay and let out the deepest, most agonizing sigh. He should be calling you every name in the book, and rightfully so, as you insulted him. Why is he being so nice? Does he really like you that much?
He returns a few minutes later, shoving his pockets with change left over, and you both lock eyes with each other. In another situation, you would’ve been able to appreciate his good looks, trendy clothes, and tiger-like appearance. But instead, you feel sick to your stomach, disappointed in how you acted. You look down, twiddling your thumbs until he finishes pumping his gas and returning to the car. This is not like you at all. “Hey,” he says. “Hi,” you stammer. “I’m sorry again. I feel like a terrible person, and I shouldn’t have bit your head off like that.” “I know you were intense, but Jesus Christ,” he exhaled. “Why do you think I wouldn’t be interested in you? You made it seem like I lost a bet to ask you out. You made me feel like crap.” Every word felt like a punch in the gut, and you deserved it. Despite your parents' many flaws, they always taught you not to judge a book by its cover, and that’s precisely what you did. You were pretentious and stuck up about him. In some ways, you aren’t any different from them. “I guess…” your voice trails off. “I just saw you as the athlete that everyone is in love with. Your friends, I know the type, and we’ve never really crossed paths with each other unless I was bumping into you or almost getting hit by your car.” “So… you saw me as the very thing I told you I didn’t want to be seen as.” You didn’t have to answer back. You both knew the answer, and it was eating you up inside. “I’m sorry, I am just gonna go.” Before he could stop you, you exited the Jeep and started walking back toward your dorm. You are embarrassed and can never face him again. This is why you don’t don’t talk to anyone. This is awkward; it feels weird. You lose yourself in your thoughts until you reach the street light, waiting for your turn to go. The air is slightly chilly than usual, the smell of the ocean taking over your senses that you would enjoy any other time. Yeah, a walk to the beach sounds nice, you say to yourself just as the street signal turns green. You feel someone’s hand pulling you away, and you twirl around, facing Soonyoung’s back as he takes you back to his car.
“You’re dramatic as hell, you know that, right?” He shouts over his shoulder. “You didn’t even let me respond; you just hopped out like you were on the run.”
You stayed silent. What more could you say? He was right. He opens the passenger side, letting you slide in and shutting the door behind you. A few seconds later, he is on your other side, turning on the ignition.
“You not a terrible person,” he breathes. “A terrible person wouldn’t come sprinting out of their doom in boots and a nice outfit trying to apologize. You said you’re sorry, and it’s fine.” “Is it?”
“I mean, I’ll get over it,” he shrugs. “I wouldn’t have pulled you back here if I didn’t want to be around you. Now, do you still want to go back and forth about this, or do you want to make it up to me by going to this concert?” It’s a brief moment of silence as you seriously consider your options. You can tell Soonyoung is still bothered by what you did, but his small smile clarifies your decision. “Lead the way, tiger.”
He chuckles as he pulls out of the lot, pulling into a line of cars headed in the same direction. The sun starts to set, the golden hour hitting the horizon at the sea. You fold your arms, confused as to why he is being so nice to you, despite you being a bitch to him earlier. You haven’t felt forgiveness in a long time, which feels foreign. Uncomfortable. You hope this feeling will go away as the night goes on.
You mainly rode in silence aside from the music on the radio, and the hour trip to the venue seemed to be double that. You pull up to Bayfront Amphitheater, packed to the brim with people screaming their hearts out to the band onstage. Your heart skips in excitement, realizing what concert Soonyoung took you to.
“The Foo Fighters?” you grin, unbuckling your seatbelt. “I’ve been wanting to see them forever.: “Yeah, I remember you were talking about it on the radio, so I figured why not,” his voice trails off.
Your heart feels like it is going to burst at the seams. This is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for you, and you had the nerve to be a bitch to him earlier.
“Hey,” you clear your throat. “I’m sorry again. I feel really shitty about it.”
“I know,” he says. “Look, let’s just enjoy this concert, and I’ll forget about it, okay?” You nod, walking towards the loud music. The rhythm of the drums and guitar blended together, hyping the crowd. You let Soonyoung lead the way, checking your tickets and guiding you to your seats. The crowd is thick, with the smell of cigarettes and alcohol flowing freely, and everyone is caught in their own zone. You wouldn’t say you are claustrophobic, but being packed like sardines isn’t your definition of a good time. Soonyoung notices your discomfort and grabs your hand, holding tight until he finds your assigned seats. You felt safe with him, a tiny spark in you that made you swoon.
“Are you okay?” He shouts over the noise. “Do you want a beer or anything?” “Nah, I’m good,” you shake your head.
The opening act finishes their set, the crowd politely cheering as the members walk off the stage. There is a small intermission, with people disbursing from their seats to grab drinks or making quick trips to the bathroom. You can feel Soonyoung looking at you, his eyes burning into the left side of your face. You lick your lips and pull strands of your hair to the back of your ear, a blatant attempt at flirting.
“Are you gonna stare at me all night?” You feel bold, turning your body towards him. “I might,” he purrs. “I have a beautiful, mysterious girl sitting beside me.”
“I’m not that mysterious. We’ve been talking for weeks.” ‘Yeah, in front of thousands of people on the radio. Now I have you all to myself, and I want to get to know the real you.”
“Uh huh,” you nod. “Well, I’m always the same on and off air. You’ll see.” “I hope so.” He smiles at you, and gotta admit the man can flirt. Soonyoung is devastatingly handsome, and he’s quick with his words. It excites you. You like being around people you can banter with and not take shit personally. It takes a load off your shoulders, not having to hold yourself back every time. You just want to be you and be free. It feels like Soonyoung is chasing the same thing.
“I wouldn’t have predicted you’d be into rock bands like the Foo Fighters. What made you want to go to their concert aside from me?”
“Well, you might be surprised to hear this, but I actually like the band,” he laughs. “I’ve been following them since their debut.”
“Really?” you say. “That’s cool.” “What?” Soonyoung leans closer, your shoulder barely touching his. “Do I not seem like the Foo Fighters type?” “Aht aht,” you playfully wave your finger at him. “I’m not getting tripped up on that question.” You fell into a rhythm of laughter that felt natural as if you had been doing this all your life. Despite your fuck up, he makes you feel cozy and open. The sun makes one final appearance, shining its glorious light on his beautiful, tanned skin. You can fully admit to yourself that he’s handsome as fuck, taking him all in before the sun dips below the horizon. “No, but seriously, I don’t seem like the type to be into them?” You pause before responding, being careful with your answer. “On the surface, no. But I am learning that there is more to a person than meets the eye.” There is a comfortable silence between you two, the sweet-smelling breeze keeping you at bay as you sit and enjoy each other’s company. You have so much you want to say but don’t simultaneously. You savor this tiny bit of peace with him. “I think I am gonna grab a drink,” Soonyoung gets up suddenly. “Do you want anything?” “Yeah, like a juice or something.” You watch him leave, checking out his ass as he stands in the concessions line. Nice and firm, definitely a football player’s ass. You look away before being caught, watching the crew prepare for the next act. You feel like a young girl who just realized you have a crush on a boy. You’re giddy inside, hypersensitive to everything around you and how you look. You hope he finds you as attractive as he says he does, or if not, keep up the lie a little longer. You’ve been dealt many disappointments in your life, and you can’t let this be one of them.
“Here. I got you a lemonade.”
You gaze up at Soonyoung, carefully grabbing the cup from his hand. He has a cup of beer in the other, sipping before making a face. You laugh in your cup, tasting your sweet drink with some tart. You feel refreshed and a little bit alive, thanks to him. “Ladies and gentlemen, who’s ready for the FOO FIGHTERS?”
The crowd erupts into a roar as the band joins the stage, getting their placements to perform. Jolts of electric excitement course throughout your body, screaming your heart out before the first string is played on the guitar. You’ve always wanted to see them in concert, being a huge fan of Nirvana and following Dave Grohl after. Despite everything, he seems like a rad guy, and
if you ever had the opportunity, you would want to pick his brain and jam out with him. “ARE YOU MUTHAFUCKERS READY?” Dave Grohl shouts into the mic.
You both scream as the first song is played, the drums scratching the excellent part of your brain while the guitars take you to another level. You look at Soonyoung, his attention on the band with his arms folded, in awe of the performance being given. He looks adorable, and all you can do is smile, satisfied that you are in this space and can experience this moment. The band keeps playing hit after hit, the energy around you making you want to levitate in the clouds. You haven’t been this happy in a long time. You reach the last song of the night, and the key changes, the guitars riffing into a song you know all too well. “I want everyone to sing this song with us— this is for the regular heroes out there.”
You feel the emotion and intensity in Dave Grohl’s voice, making you emotional. The song is about the ordinary person and their potential; you wish your family saw your potential. You wish you could share your music with them and see you thrive in the elements you’re most comfortable in. But instead, you’ve been cast out, and as much as you worked hard to get over it, it hurts you deeply. “Are you okay?” Soonyoung looks at you wide-eyed; you’re unaware of the tears trickling down your face. All you want to do is be held and told everything will be okay. As if he read your mind, he holds your hand, his thumb rubbing your palm softly, keeping you anchored in your emotional storm. Nothing else needed to be said between you two; the song lyrics moved your spirit. Kudos, my hero
Leavin' all the mess
You know my hero
The one that's on
There goes my hero
Watch him as he goes
There goes my hero
He's ordinary
“Thank you for taking me to the concert. I had a really good time.”
You sit with Soonyoung in his car, sitting outside of your dorm. You talked about music all the
way back home, singling your hearts out to whatever is on the radio. Soonyoung is surprisingly a good singer, hitting some notes even better than you can. You wonder if he had any training. “I’m glad I was able to make it up to you,” he grins. “Oh, please,” you wave him off. I’m the one who started us on the wrong foot.” “True. But I think you more than made up for it tonight.” “Yeah, yeah,” you roll your eyes playfully. “Can I ask you something?” “Sure.”
“Why were you crying during the concert?” You knew this question would come eventually, but you still felt unprepared. You hadn’t really talked about your family life with anyone besides Nikki, but you were determined to keep it to yourself. But he makes you want to open up. “The song really hits me,” you point at your chest. “I feel every word and every percussion note as it plays. It reminds me of my mom and dad, and I wish they saw me as a normal person with their own aspirations rather than the person they want me to be. It was so quiet that you could hear a pin drop. Soonyoung nodded his head, understanding what you were saying.
“My parents wanted me to be a doctor or a lawyer, and I just don’t see myself doing that. I fell in love with music and singing, and when I shared that I wanted to do songwriting full-time, they made me feel so low. Like I am stupid and naive for wanting a career, I would actually be happy.” You huff, wiping fresh tears off of your face. “I just wanted them to support me, but they couldn’t even do that. Aside from my grandparents, they cut me off completely.” “That’s not cool,” Soonyoung scoffs. “So they just went cold turkey and quit talking to you?” You nod, bitterly reliving the last conversation you had with them before you made no contact. “Why can’t our parents just let us live the lives we want? It’s like they want to live vicariously through us.” “Right?!” You exclaim. “See, you get it!”
“Unfortunately, yeah,” he mumbled. You turn your body to look at him, studying his face and the possible thoughts he is having. You may see more eye to eye than you realize. ‘So, what’s your damage?” You poke at him. “It’s the same as yours,” he revealed. “They just want me to keep playing basketball so I can go into the big leagues and take care of everyone. I am essentially everyone’s meal ticket.” “Well, you don’t have to be,” you say. “You could just say fuck ‘em and live for yourself.” “Easier said than done,” he sighs. “I’m the first person in my family to attend college, and I actually like playing basketball. I believe in it, bleed it, all that… but whenever I am around my folks or friends, that’s all they want me to be about it. It’s like I’m not real. I am a person with complex interests and feelings, too.”
“I know exactly what you mean, tiger.”
You smile reassuringly; you understand that last sentence all too well. Your family would rather consider you the family fuck up, the black sheep, instead of understanding that you wanted different things. Why is that so fucking complicated? You stifle a yawn, looking at your watch and seeing how late it was.
“I really like talking to you and being around you,” Soonyoung confesses. I hope we can do it more.” “Yeah,” you gaze into his eyes. “ I would love that.” He walks you to your dorm, opens the doors, and holds your waist as you walk up the steps. His hands bring jitters and butterflies in your stomach that you hope you can experience more. You know you have a hard, cold exterior on the outside, but deep down, you want to feel love and adoration from someone. You hope Soonyoung can bring that.
You never want this feeling to go away.
“Thank you for walking me in,” you say, unlocking the keys to your room. “I know I was being a bitch early, but thank you for showing me a good time anyway.”
“It was worth it, seeing a smile on your face.”
“Was it?”
“Yeah,” he leans in closer. “I want to see it more.”
His lips touch yours, your chest bursting like fireworks as he deepens the kiss. Your arms rest on his shoulders, feeling natural and comfortable like a glove. He is gentle and kind, not doing too much but making you feel safe and like you can depend on him. It's crazy how one kiss can have you seeing your future.
“We should do that more often,” you joke, leaving one last peck. He chuckles, pulling you into a hug. “We will. I’ll make sure to do it more often.”
“Okay,” you say, walking into your dorm. “I’ll hold you to it.”
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