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a-libra-writes · 4 years ago

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Bathing With the RDR2 Gang

This is 150% self indulgent please forgive me. Im only in like chap 3 of the game haha but i cant resist. rockstar please cant i just give everyone a bath and nicer clothes??? let me give tilly lots of dresses i beg you

In this imagine, you’ll be warshin: Arthur Morgan, John Marston, Dutch van Der Linde, Hosea Matthews, Sadie Adler, Micah Bell, Charles Smith, Bill Williamson, Javier Escuella, Sean MacGuire, Lenny Summers, Kieran Duffy, Tilly Jackson, Mary-Beth Gaskill, Karen Jones

ARTHUR MORGAN

He’s bashful about it at first, even if you’ve been together before, but it doesn’t take long at all for him to relax. He really enjoys the closeness of it, and how intimate and calming something as simple as sitting in water can be. It’s a little cold, which just makes him want to hold you closer. If he’s had an exhausting day, he’ll lean on your shoulder and close his eyes, slowly dozing off as you run your fingers through his hair. You figure you should let him rest, and you wash the rest of him while he sighs contentedly against your wet skin. After a bath, regardless if it’s in a river or tub, he’s always worried you’ll catch cold. He packs an extra jacket or shirt of his for you to wear. If you had a warm bath at the saloon, he’ll be in such a snuggly, intimate mood that he’ll grin as he carries you to the room.

JOHN MARSTON

You’ve never met a man who gets as mangy as he does, and so quickly! You have to drag him to a river to properly wash, since he seems to just splash water on his face and arms and call it a day. John fusses with embarrassment at first and can’t believe you actually brought fancy soaps (any soap is fancy to him), but he quiets down once you strip. Once you’re in the water and lathering him up, he’s bashful from the attention but actually really likes it. He can’t help himself from getting handsy, almost clingy, but he stays obedient and rinses off when you tell him. He’s not so fond of the saloon tubs, even with the hot water, because it just feels too cramped. The openness of a lake or river, along with the bright sun and noise of nature, is just objectively better.

DUTCH VAN DER LINDE

While he loves sharing a bath with you, it’s definitely an indulgence and one you both don’t always have time for. So when there’s time, he makes sure it’s a cozy tub with plenty of hot water. He thinks it’s adorable if you want to wash him and care for him, because he’d rather do that to you. Sometimes he’s chatty and playful, other times he’s tired and thoughtful, but Dutch always likes to just hold you and soak for a bit. He’ll make sure you’re dried off and warm first, and he’ll want to keep touching you, so he’ll want to dress you and escort you to the room. Dutch really can’t get enough of your skin when it’s wet and smelling so nice, so you aren’t going to sleep anytime soon.

HOSEA MATTHEWS

He enjoys bathing out in nature, even if there isn’t always time for a proper wash, so your suggestion to take a dip in the lake amuses him. He’d rather wash you first, enjoying the simplicity of doing something like that for someone he loves. You two often end up chatting and joking about this or that while you just take your time and enjoy the sunny day. Hosea doesn’t mind if the water is a little cold, it invigorates him better than a cup of coffee. He always urges you to dry off and dress quickly so you don’t catch cold, and he’s the one who double checks to make sure you both brought a spare change of clothes. Hosea doesn’t mind a hot bath in the saloon, even if it is cramped. It makes him terribly sleepy, though, he’ll rest his head in the crook of your neck… but he’d rather not fall asleep in a giant porcelain bowl, so he’d urge you to head to bed with him.

SADIE ADLER

Honestly, she’s a little too embarrassed to squeeze in a tub with you, so a quick wash in a river is preferable. Her first thought is to strip down and get it done quick, but it’s a pleasant surprise when you want to sit in the water and help wash her for a bit. Only a bit, she says, but she ends up enjoying the smalltalk and admiring you. She’d rather wash herself, but she wants to help you reach any spots you can’t get. If she’s feeling more relaxed and sentimental, she’ll want to take care of your hair, too. Sadie prefers bathing with you at night, half because it feels more private, half because it feels like you have all the time in the world and you both can just enjoy each other’s company and the stars. It always makes her feel less tense and helps her sleep a little better.

MICAH BELL

Good lord, it’s like wrangling a cat. Your chance of success is significantly higher if he’s drunk and you promise sex afterward. You all but push him into the river, he grumbles and swears the entire time, he can’t believe you have “soap and shit”, also he can’t keep his hands to himself and wants to drag you into his lap. You could’ve washed his hair in just a few minutes, but it takes longer because you keep swatting his hands away and scolding him for nipping at your neck and shoulders. He’d never admit how nice your fingers feel on his scalp, even if it relaxes him to the point where he’s quieter and less handsy. You don’t bother taking him to the saloon for a dip in the tub because there’s no way he’ll give a shit about bathing when you’re squeezed in such a tight spot with him.

CHARLES SMITH

He loves bathing in rivers and lakes with you; he’s the one to casually suggest it first. It’s just such a simple yet private and loving thing for him, he can’t keep the grin off his face as you strip down and join him in the water. He wants to spoil you first, really touch and enjoy every inch of you, but he melts in your hands when you start washing his hair and rubbing his broad back. His favorite time to do it is at night, since you look so beautiful under the glow of the moon and the stars. If you both are feeling more playful, he’ll definitely splash at you or drag you to the deep end to swim around. Once you both are thoroughly clean and tired, he’ll want to fetch your dry clothes for you, and he always packs a blanket in case you want to sit out and enjoy the night.

BILL WILLIAMSON

Well, your offer embarrassed him at first, but then you teased him and playfully dared him and well, now you’re here at the riverbank and he’s stripping down in a huff. You were surprised how shy he was at first, since it wasn’t the first time you’d been naked together. Bill wasn’t sure where he should put his hands (or his eyes) and how deep in the water you wanted to go, but once you cuddled close and started washing him, that all melted away. It’s exciting and fun to him, and he likes the soaps you use on him. Even if they smell girly and flowery, it’s what you use, and it’s nice to have your hands on him. Maybe this is why they’re so soft? Afterward he’d really want you to wear one of his shirts back to camp, and he’s disappointed when the smell of your soap eventually fades off the flannel.

JAVIER ESCUELLA

He jumps at the suggestion when you first make it, and he’s the sort to prefer the saloons and their hot water. First of all, hot steaming water, often with bubbles because of the soaps you bring, and he gets to keep you as close as he pleases and “accidentally” brush against your body at all angles. No downsides here. He dislikes the cold water of lakes and rivers; the sun is rarely strong enough to warm them. He’s very weak to you washing his hair. He’ll lean into your touch and give you all sorts of kisses and praises as you run your fingers through it. He’s in such a giddy, warm mood afterward that he wants to dry you off himself and carry you to the room, grinning like you two are newlyweds. There’s no way he’s letting the night end with just a bath.

SEAN MACGUIRE

Alright, he talks big game when you suggest it, grinning that of course he couldn’t turn down such an offer, and you two won’t be doing much bathing, if you get his point. You just roll your eyes and tell him to follow you. The thing is, once you start stripping down without a care, he starts getting a little red in the ears. By the time you’re both nude and you’re relaxing in the water, he’s flushed to his neck but still trying to make jokes. He’s startled that you actually want to help him wash, and when he does the same, he’s seriously conflicted on where to put his hands. Once he’s relaxed, the “accidental” touches are gonna happen all the time and a splash fight will break out. Once you’re all dried off and heading back to camp, he totally talks big game and wants to kiss on you and brag about your little dip, as if it’s something scandalous.

LENNY SUMMERS

He’s totally flustered at your suggestion but there’s no way he’s not doing it. He’d rather go to the river, especially at night, since it feels more private and something about a stuffy, heated saloon bathing room is a bit … much. Besides, this way you can see the stars and moon, and be as loud as you want. Lenny’s nerves all but melt away once you both start talking and washing, and he gets in a very content, cuddly mood. He makes a point to remember the soaps you like so he can get more if he comes across any, and he wants to help you dry off so he’s sure you won’t get too cold. He’ll probably suggest sitting by the campfire for a bit, just to be sure (and just because he wants to keep cuddling).

KIERAN DUFFY

This poor man, why are you teasing him like this? He’s so sure there’s some kind of punchline, but you walked with him all the way to the river, and now you’re stripping down … He’s so flushed with embarrassment, but there’s no way he’s not following you into the water. Once you joke around with him and talk to settle his nerves, the tension finally leaves his shoulders. He’ll be a little unsure about you touching and washing him, but he’s glad to do the same for you, trying very hard not to get distracted by the softness of your skin. Once you’re ready to get out, Kieran suddenly worries about you being cold, and he really insists on you wearing his jacket on top of your’s, and that you ought to sit by a fire to warm up. It’s cute how much he frets about this.

TILLY JACKSON

Tilly will pick warm water and a cramped tub any day of the week, and really, it’s not so bad since you’re both ladies and she’s fairly short. She finds the cramped space comical if anything, and you both will be wiggling and giggling while you wash off and just leisurely enjoy the bath. She’s the type who doesn’t like to prune, but she won’t get out until you do. She has a nice collection of soaps and often finds ones you like, and helps you wash after you help her. Afterward she definitely wants to cuddle and probably apply some lotions; you think it’s cute how much she likes feeling so clean and pretty. All that plus the saloon’s mostly cozy bed makes you two feel like fancy ladies living in luxury, and you both grin and recall it for a least a week afterward. A dip in the river is so … unexciting by comparison, you both just sigh and wash quickly before you shiver to death.

MARY-BETH GASKILL

Your offer made the color rise to her cheeks, even if you’d been intimate before. Why hadn’t this occurred to her? It seemed like a private thing, but she was too interested. She always thought a hot bath was the height of comfort, but when you took her to the river, she was in awe over how quiet and cozy it was as the sun set. The colors of the sky and stillness of the water was so romantic! She likes being the one to undo your hair and clothes, although she’s shy about you doing the same and wanting to wash her. Mary-Beth loves having nice soap to wash with and will admire you for having several on hand. She can’t help but be full of giggles and give you lots of kisses while you both sit and chat.

KAREN JONES

She’ll laugh at such a “saucy” suggestion, but she’s game for either a quick dip in the river or a trip to the saloon. When it comes to a warm tub, her usual jokes and fun will peter out as she gets sleepy and cuddles up to you. No matter where you two are, washing her hair and massaging her back makes her tired, and she’ll curl up in your arms and tease you about carrying a nice lady back to her bed. Once you two are dried off, she’ll wake up enough to help tie your hair up and dress for bed or for the day, depending on when you bathed. If it’s the morning, she’ll need just a few kisses and hugs to be energetic again. If she’s still chilly afterward, she’ll borrow one of your jackets and wear it well after she’s dried off.

#rdr2 x reader #rdr2 #rdr2 imagines #arthur morgan x reader #john marston x reader #dutch van der linde x reader #hosea matthews x reader #sadie adler x reader #micah bell x reader #charles smith x reader #bill williamson x reader #javier escuella x reader #sean macguire x reader #lenny summers x reader #kieran duffy x reader #tilly jackson x reader #mary-beth gaskill x reader #karen jones x reader

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drafthearse · 3 years ago

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albums from today:

Do You Know Who You Are? overall rating: 2.5/5 tracks to keep: 4/16 thoughts: added this to my list after norman brannon joined the thursday tour. gay rights. also shoutout for using my fave misfits song for band name insp! pretty standard posthardcore 90s/00s emo rock fare-- luckily i eat that shit up.

Terraformer overall rating: 3/5. tracks to keep: 6/13 thoughts: not sure how i got this-- i THINK i found them while i was on a tear looking for rock bands with violins to use for thot topic insp. oh holy fuck they’re from jersey. represent. im really picky about songs longer than 5 mins and instrumental tracks, both of which this album has in spades >__> which is not to say that they’re bad, but that i just don’t listen to them a lot. that said: not bad, guys. dare i say newt geiszler vibes. like a coheed and cambria or protest the hero sound, but with a shitload more brass. i dig it! badass guitar melodies. the issue w an album consisting mostly of very long songs that are each individually made up of many dissimilar segments (as opposed to following a typical v-c-v-c-b-c-c structure) is that the tracks all blend together for me in my head and i cant tell them apart. so i did get a bit of that here which was frustrating. standout tracks: everyday ghosts, fxmldr,

Sharp Teeth, Crooked Jaws overall rating: 2/5 tracks to keep: 3/9 thoughts: recced to me by way of anon, if i recall. not unpleasant to listen to, but not especially gripping. i get the sense this guy really, really likes the strokes. standout tracks: superfuturists, coma politik.

The Color Before The Sun overall rating: 4/5 tracks to keep: 6/10 thoughts: only coheed album left for me to listen to! aaaargh i love coheed and cambria wtf. dont get me wrong, i adore coheed’s insane scifi shit but it’s great to know that they can write a baller album even without it! atlas made me feel fucking weepy.

Random Access Memories overall rating: 2/5 tracks to keep: 1/14 thoughts: picked a daft punk album at random on account of mary dafttpunk always blogging abt them. obviously i had already heard get lucky. unfortunately the level to which i was absolutely saturated in get lucky circa 2013 has tainted the song for me and i just cannot enjoy it. as for the rest of the album-- one of those scenarios where i can tell that the music is, like, good, but i just don’t rlly like listening to it that much.

The King is Dead overall rating: 1/5 tracks to keep: 2/10 thoughts: i think mac described this to me as a destiel album. not my kind of sound though. standout tracks were down by the river and rox in the box.

84 albums left!

#the list 2022

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henrycavell · 4 years ago

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obsession

summary: she managed to escape him for a short time, but now he had found her. word count: 2,353

pairing: august walker/unknown ofc

warnings: this is noncon smut!! if you’re not into that please do not read, i don’t want to upset or trigger anyone. also breeding.

a/n: please tell me what you think!! im so nervous. this is my first time writing smut all by myself, too, so please be nice ok love you guys thanks

tag list: @evnscvll @promptandpros @iloveyouwhiskey @crimsonrae @littlefreya @mary-ann84 @dearlybelovedluke @vacant-writings @wondersofdreaming @80scavill

Nothing had looked out of the ordinary, everything was quiet and untouched like it always was. She closed the door behind herself, locking it like she always did, setting the chain into place. Dropping her bag by the door and sliding out of her heels, she moved through the hall, already beginning to undress from that day’s work clothes. Tugging her blouse up over her head, it fell to the floor just a few feet from her bedroom door. She froze, her eyes trained on the floor where she saw loose rose petals scattered, leading further into the room. In her bedroom, strewn across her bed were multiple roses, with long stems covered in thorns. A pink card rested on top of the gray downy sheets.

Her body ran cold, paralyzed by fear as her eyes fell to the card, not realizing he was standing right behind her. Forcing herself to move, her hand dropped to the bed, picking up the little pink note. Her name was scribbled on the side facing up and when she flipped it over, there were only three words jotted down, in a handwriting she could never erase from her mind;

𝒻𝑜𝓊𝓃𝒹 𝓎𝑜𝓊, 𝒶𝓃𝑔𝑒𝓁.

Dread ate at her insides as she stared at the card, feeling vomit in the back of her throat. The note fell from her hand, but before it could even land back on the bed, August stepped forward, reaching a hand up to brush the hair back off of her shoulders. His thumbs brushed over the thin straps of her bra. It didn’t surprise her that he had found her, but now that he had, she wished she had run just a little faster.

“Do you know how badly I’ve missed you, angel?” August’s voice was smooth and honeyed, his breath tickling her neck as he pushed her bra straps down her shoulders. His touch was cold and almost desperate, as if he was fearful that she would disappear in the blink of an eye. And almost just as bad, she ripped herself out of his hands, backing away as she turned to look at him. It had been years, now, nearly three since she’d stared into those zaffre eyes, since she had been petrified by that dead, sobering glare.

“I- you… c-can’t be here,” she stumbled over her words, the last bit of color leaving her face as she looked onto his face.

“I can’t?” August answered her, his brow pulling down as he stalked towards her, his hands reaching up to his collar, loosening his tie. “Who's going to make me leave?” Sliding his tie from around his neck, August held it loosely in his right hand, a little sneer rising to his face.

The air around them almost felt suffocating. Each one of his words came out in a soft, gentle breath, almost as if he was worried he’d scare her away like some stray animal. “I’ve thought about you every waking moment we’ve been apart,” August closed the distance between them, “thought about how it would feel to taste your lips again, run my fingers through your hair, be inside of you again,” the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end and her breath caught in the back of her throat.

“No-” she whimpered, but it was too late. Before she had even realized it, August had wrapped his arms around her, tying her wrists together behind her back with his tie. And now it was too late to react, to struggle. He continued to back her up against the wall, caging her inside of his arms. “O-ow,” she choked, his weight pressing her flat against the wall, squishing her hands beneath them.

August grinned, his hands running down her curves to the waistband of her jeans, where his fingers teased the button and her zipper. “Are you going to try and fight, baby girl? You know I love a good fight,” he purred. Pushing them down her hips, she couldn’t help the pleas that it evoked. His hand was forcing its way between her thighs, driving her legs apart. “Stop-” she choked out, the tips of his fingers pinching and pulling at the thin layer of lace that shielded her for the moment.

It was hard to remember a time when she wanted August, yearned for his touch and would beg for it. That time had long since passed, back when everything was masked by smoke and mirrors. When she didn’t know the truth of who he was.

“Your body doesn’t seem to agree with you.” It was true that her body was betraying her, warmth pooling in her gut and she had wet through her panties, excited and sticky for his touch. Animalistic and carnal noises broke in the back of his throat. She arched her back, but tried throwing her shoulders against him, squirming her legs. Any attempt to push him off of her, but he had her pinned firmly between his body and the wall, unmovable like a mountain. His fingers pushed her panties to the side, the sensation of his fingers exploring and dipping inside of her causing her breath to catch in the back of her throat. “Nice and tight, no one’s been in here since me, have they, darling?”

Her face blushed red, burning hot from embarrassment as she looked up to meet his royal blue eyes. She’d never admit it to him, but since August, no other man had been able to please her in the way he could. Having him here now felt like some weird mash up of a blissful dream and a hellish nightmare. Her body was responding in ways she hated, her thighs were trembling and every new touch had a desperate moan dripping off of her tongue.

Supple lips caressed over her shoulder, towards the crook of her neck, placing gentle, sweet kisses up her neck. “You thought that you could leave me, that you could get away from me,” the tone of his voice was now taking a dark shift, his tongue sharp enough to cut like a knife. The tender prodding he’d been doing between her legs finished, August forced two of his fingers into her cunt knuckle deep, eliciting a sharp painful gasp from her pouty lips. “You’ve always belonged to me, angel.”

There wasn’t much fight in her, not for August. She’d always been so terrified of him, it had taken every ounce of courage she had to leave his apartment that night. Under the light from the hanging moon, she had left all of her things and just escaped. And now that his body was crushing down on her, forcing the air from her lungs, forbidding any sort of noise from now leaving her lips, he fucked her relentlessly with his fingers. August had every intention of taking back what was rightfully his, and tonight, he’d make sure to tie them together for the rest of their lives.

Pulling his hand free from between her legs, he admired the glistening wetness that coated him. Just another thing that pushed him further into delusion, helping him to believe that she really did want this. Stepping away from her, the woman took in a deep breath, crying out in relief as air flooded her lungs. She collapsed to her knees and he just laughed, circling her like a predator hunting its prey. “Isn’t that a beautiful sight.”

Stopping behind her, August grabbed her up by her arms, moving her to the edge of the bed where he slammed her chest down into the mattress. Her face was pressed down into the blankets, hot and sweltering already as she cried, begging for mercy though her voice was hidden and muffled. “Stop it, August! Stop, I don’t want this!” Kicking her legs and trying to squirm back up to her feet, August leaned forward and held her head down firmly into the sheets, stomping at her legs until her fighting stopped.

If it hadn’t been obvious before, she knew now that she had no choice in the matter. She belonged to August, she always would. And he was here to take back what he owned.

Flinching at the sound of his zipper, she gasped when he kicked her knees apart, positioning her just how he wanted. His hand moved up the curve of her ass, to her lower back where he pressed down sharply, forcing her to arch her back. On display for him now, August admired her sopping wet core, red and swollen, begging for attention that he was ready to give. Slapping and grabbing at her round ass, August probed another finger inside of her, a hot tingle running straight to the head of his cock. She was intensely tight around him, squeezing and hugging onto him in an effort to keep him inside. “You can’t keep lying, just admit it, you want me.”

“No!” She refused to budge, clawing and grabbing fistfuls of blanket in her hands, keeping her eyes screwed shut tightly in an attempt to keep herself from crying. Continuously, she tried to close her thighs, hide herself from him but he would just force her open once more. August grabbed her hips tightly in his hands, his fingers pressing into her skin so firmly he was sure to leave bruises behind as he mounted her. Lining his cock up with her entrance, all he cared about was feeling her stretching around him, his own satisfaction.

The head of his cock teased and slid against her folds, “I’m going to fuck this pussy so hard you won’t even be able to think about running away from me again.” Sliding himself into her until his balls slapped against her cunt, August groaned, his eyes rolling back into his head. A frenzied cry tore through the room and she pressed her own face down deeper into the mattress, biting down on the blankets to keep herself quiet. She knew August enjoyed a loud show, enjoyed knowing just how much pain he was putting her through and she didn’t want to give him the pleasure.

August didn’t care to wait for her to accommodate to his girth, instead, beginning to ram himself back and forth. Her walls stretched and molded around him, squeezing him tightly and coercing him to fuck even deeper. The fevered sounds of skin on skin slapping echoed through the room, her quiet whimpers of pain and ecstasy breaking through every now and then, but August didn’t halt. The bed underneath of her rocked and swayed, threatened to collapse with the force August was exerting into her.

He didn’t allow her to get used to his rhythm either, reaching forward, he let one hand free of her hip to wrap her dark hair around his fist, forcing her to arch up off of the mattress. No longer could she use the bed to quiet the sounds of her cries. August fucked her with a fiery passion, completely taking over her body as he held her flush to his chest. “Scream for me,” he moaned into her ear, sweat already perspiring across his face and shoulders.

Slamming into her cervix, waves of ecstasy and pleasure seemed to be crashing around inside of her as his size demanded to be felt. Her brain felt foggy and dazed, unable to think rationally any longer as she panted and moaned, relaxing her back against his chest as he fucked into her. Her hands, still tied behind her back, tried grabbing at his shirt, twisting the material in her fingers as he broke out into raspy, hot grunts.

She was almost beginning to enjoy herself, getting over how she had wanted nothing to do with him, wanting nothing to do with this. She felt so full, molded around him, like he fit so perfectly inside. Had she missed him? His arm wrapped around her chest, his hand running up until her neck was held tightly in his grip. Closing off her airways, she gasped for breath, tears burning the corners of her eyes as she grinded her ass back on him, partially enjoying herself, partially wishing for it to come to an end, for him to just finish.

“Fuck,” August groaned against her ear, his breath hot, yet still sending shivers down her spine. “You feel so good, missed you so much,” he pressed his lips to the back of her head as he continued to press himself harder into her. “Gonna make sure you can never leave me again,” he promised her, his strokes becoming slower but deeper. August was making sure to take his time, enjoying every single second of feeling her cunt squeezing him.

With his hand still gripping her throat, she was unable to speak, her face turning a pale shade from the lack of air. All she could do was wheeze, her fingers scratching at the skin beneath his shirt. Every ridge and groove hugged August’s cock, his head kissing her cervix as he sheathed himself deep inside of her. She couldn’t ignore the sudden hot sensation washing over her as her cunt spasmed and gripped him tightly, feeling little explosions going off in her stomach as she came hard on his cock.

That was all August had been waiting for. He released his hand from her throat, letting it fall back to her hips as he dug his nails into her, releasing his hot load deep inside against her womb. Still bucking his hips up into her, August rode out his climax alongside her. Deep, guttural moans almost completely hiding the sound of her crying as he filled her. Her knees began to violently shake, and her chest fell back against the mattress, heaving as she tried to catch her breath. Tears blurred her vision and smeared down her face as she felt August leave her, his hot semen dripping from her core. He moved back to his feet, his azure eyes trained still between her legs, watching as his essence trickled from her cunt like some sweet nectar.

“You can never escape me now.”

#august walker fanfic #henry cavill fanfic #august walker smut #henry cavill smut #august walker x ofc #august walker x female #obession

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faradayys · 4 years ago

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so i just finished ruin and rising and im 🥺🥺

(spoilers for the grishaverse shadow and bone trilogy)!!!!!

- the ending was so cute!! i love the fact that mal and alina went back to the orphanage but as owners. its very fitting given the recurrent themes of them being orphans

- when nikolai, david, genya, and zoya were mentioned to visit them i may or may not have teared up a little esp with the blue kefta and “you’ll always be one of us”

- the grief alina had for her loss of powers was fucking felt. i felt that. i don’t have the power to control light but i felt her grief. that one scene where her fingers would play in a beam of sunlight hit hard

- i dont rly care about mal bc half his personality is just A N G Y and the other is just alina but brownie points to him for at least being a decent guy

- i love you nikolai lantsov 🥺🥺

- as always nikolai is amazing in every scene he’s in.

- speaking of nikolai, the few times he appeared as the shadow thingy creature was, idk how to say it,, cute and sad? the one part before the battle in the fold where nikolai visits alina and he puts the lantsov emerald on her finger?? i 🥺😭

- the little detail of him not being able to read while being the shadow thingy creature was nice

- HARSHAW 😭😭😭

- nadia and tamar!!! the lesbians are winning

- genya and david are so fucking cute

- speaking of nadia, im glad to see that she’s come so far?? in book 1 she was just an accessory to marie but now she’s so strong,, and fearless,,

- misha and adrik 🥺 im so glad they lived lmao

- BAGHRA 😭😭😭😭 i have a soft spot for the mean but well intentioned mentors and shes no different

- i mentioned it before but her trying to “redeem her son” was a good detail

- darkling.

- idk if i legit hate him but i know that my hatred for him increased tenfold with the scene of Keramzim(??) being burnt down

- but given how that turned out and how hispersonality is, i think he’s pretty okay written as a character. the whole eternity thing and the love for ravka helped rounded him out as not just Bad Villain™️ but as a human as well

- darkling was also a kind of well meaning guy (getting ravka to be an actually good country esp given the neglect of the previous lantsov kings + making sure grisha suffered no more abuse) but the actions he took were far too extreme. i respect those kinds of characters and leigh bardugo, imo, did a good job treading the fine line between Just A Bad Villain™️ and a human for him

- i think it’s really unfortunate that we didn’t get to see much of the people that inherited alina’s power? like even in six of crows and crooked kingdom, surely there’d be at least some passing mention of it, especially from nina.

- zoya was a straight up bitch in the previous books and i didn’t like her the first time i read the series but now i appreciate her a lot. maybe she’ll even make for a good queen ;) wink wink

- this series has its ups and downs but you know what? i enjoyed it. the world was very alive and the whole magic thing, something very overused now, was taken to a pretty unique angle.

- the grisha’s powers are literally called the Small Science so maybe the series can also be counted as a sci-fi book??? LMAO jk

- but seriously the magic as a science thing is such a good way to put it. like that quote where our tech now would look like magic to cavemen or something.

- “what is infinite? the universe and the greed of men” and “i am not ruined. i am ruination” will always stay with me

- i hope mal and alina make a cameo in nikolai’s duology plz plz plz

#grishaverse #grishaverse shit #fara rambles

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queenbirbs · 4 years ago

Text

the way home | Ch. 3 | Edward x MC

Pairing: Edward Mortemer x MC

Word count: 3,417

Warnings: language, violence, mention of blood

Read from the beginning or continue on Read on AO3

Tag list: @writinghereandthere ------

Whatever Robert says or does against Rhodes seems to work.

For the next week, as they hop from island to island, he gives Elena a wide berth. It doesn’t stop the death glares he gives her on the regular, but she’ll take those over him dropping a sack over her head and kidnapping her, as her nightmares depict.

He can’t ruin today, though. The next outpost is St. Sylvain -- finally, a place where Elena has contacts of her own. Well, Charlie’s, she considers, which brings that familiar rush of heartache. She misses her best friend; misses her snarky, carefree attitude; misses her crude jokes and compassionate heart. Though Robert tries with his sarcastic tongue, he can never measure up to Charlie’s quick wit.

As soon as the ship docks, Elena is off, flapping a hand at Robert’s reminder to only ask for information from those she trusts. Down the gangplank and across the port, she makes her way into the open-air market and searches along the rows of brightly-colored stalls. As if no time has passed, Bronte leans out from her own stall and waves at her as she approaches.

“Ah, the fiercest pirate in all the seven seas!” she crows, her wrinkles creasing as she grins. “You’re Charlotte’s friend, aren’t ya? She’s been looking all over for ya.”

“She has?” Elena asks, tightly clenching the leather strap across her chest.

“O’course. She was here…” she trails off, tapping a finger against her stall as if counting up the days in her head. “...oh, sometime before the big storm. Was makin’ her rounds of the place, askin’ if ye’d been around.”

“Did she say where she was headed?”

“Afraid not.” Settling her weight across the table, she opens her mouth, then pauses to squint at something along the market. Elena glances over her shoulder, but spots nothing of interest among the crowded stalls. “But here -- let me give ye something.”

Bronte bends down and heaves up a basket of what looks like knitting supplies, clicking her tongue as she digs through it. Sweeping her hair to one shoulder, Elena keeps watch of the market until the older woman hums a noise of victory. She pulls out a makeshift cross, bound with red thread. “‘Tis made from the twigs of a Rowan tree. Keep it on yer person. It’ll offer ye protection from evil spirits on yer journey.”

Given her recent history, Elena’s made a point to avoid picking up any old object. But she doesn’t want to seem rude, and who is she to argue against something that will bring protection? Taking the charm, she tucks it into the pocket of her coat.

“Thank you -- for the protection, and for speaking with me.”

Bronte smiles at her once more. “If I see young Charlotte, I’ll be sure to send her yer way.”

------

The rest of the day is a wash.

Her stop by the St. Sylvain Inn to speak with Mary takes the better part of an hour. Most of that time, however, is taken up by helping Mary toss out an unruly guest. What little chance at conversation they manage to have, Elena finds that her knowledge about Charlie’s whereabouts is limited.

“She asked if I’d seen you, actually.” Mary’s face brightens at the memory, before she bites at her lip and frowns. “But this was months back. Certainly well before the hurricane.”

At the blacksmith’s, Elena wanders around the shop as the man there speaks with a customer. They hem and haw over the fine details of a new gate, going back and forth about prices. She bides her time by looking at a row of gleaming blades. One of the daggers catches her eye for the level of details carved along the hilt; it reminds her of the pistol Charlie gave her, all those years ago. The customer eventually leaves, having refused such a high cost for ‘such subpar craftsmanship.’

“What can I do for ye, ma’am?” the blacksmith calls out to her, wiping away the sweat on his face. “Interested in anything?”

Elena leaves the wares and crosses the room to be heard above the roar of the forge. “No, sorry. I was wondering if Tripp was working today?”

The blacksmith turns back to his project, tapping at a piece of glowing metal with his hammer. ��He don’t work here no more.”

“Oh. Do you know where he works now, then?”

“No.”

“Do you know where he lives?”

“No.”

“Do you know where I can--”

He slams the hammer down and a burst of hot sparks flares up into her face. The sword is in her hand and at his throat before she realizes it -- and before the man has the attempt to lift the hammer in defense.

“Listen, alright.” He licks his lips and eyes the sword’s gleaming edge. “He left about three months ago. Said that he was going to try and head back home.”

“Where’s that?” she snaps, though she eases the sword back a few inches to give him the illusion of space.

“I don’t-- maybe, maybe St. Fisher, or England. I dunno, I never asked. All I know is that he went off, and I haven’t seen ‘im since.”

Elena flicks her sword away and slides it back into its scabbard, suppressing her smirk at the man’s audible breath of relief. Brushing past another woman on her way out, she starts her trek back to the market to try any other of Charlie’s contacts. She’s nearly reached the main drag when there’s a voice from behind her.

“Is yer name Elena Montgomery?”

Elena spins around to face the stranger. It’s the woman from the shop, her auburn hair matted to her neck from the heat -- and, presumably, from chasing Elena down. Her accent is similar to Kendrick’s, her voice low and rich.

“It is. And you are…?”

“Oh, sorry -- I’m Fran.” She shifts the satchel she carries from one shoulder to the other, trying to catch her breath. “I’m sorry, too, for chasing after you like that. I saw you at the inn, talking with Mary. Are you looking for Edward Mortemer?”

“I am.”

“I just met a lad who talked about doing business with him.”

“When?”

“Two hours ago or so, I think. I was out near the market and we struck up a--”

“No, when did he see Edward?” Elena clarifies.

“Oh.” Fran’s nose scrunches up as she tries to recall. “I think he mentioned it was o’er the summer? I’m not for certain. I can take you to him -- if he’s still at his stall.”

It’s too good to be true. After weeks of searching, a lead like this doesn’t just fall into her lap. She would be a fool to go with some random woman, despite how cute she is. But she can’t turn her back on an opportunity like this.

“Yes, please,” she all but begs.

Fran guides her through the streets, clearly a local in her knowledge on how to avoid the congested areas. She isn’t much for talking, which Elena appreciates, as she’s too caught up in her own thoughts. Even if this man saw Edward over the summer, does that mean it was here, or somewhere across the globe? If it was over in Portugal or the Philippines, then what the hell is she supposed to do? What if she returned too late? What if Edward, Charlie, and the crew were one of the twelve ships lost in the storm? Elena fiddles with the necklace, worrying the chain in between her fingers. She knows the risk of using the whistle again -- but she will, if it means saving their lives from such a fate.

“That’s a pretty charm you have there,” Fran says, breaking the silence between them. “A bit odd-looking, but pretty.”

“Thanks.” Feigning a smile, Elena tries to subtly tuck it back into her shirt.

They reach the market soon enough. Along with Bronte’s, most of the stalls are boarded up or packed away. Out in the harbor, strong winds batter at the ships’ flags and rigging. Thick clouds roll along above the island, warning them of the approaching storm. Across the horizon, lightning dances atop the white-capped waves. Fran continues down to a covered section of the wharf, shadowed by a large building for ship repairs.

“Tommy! You still here?” she calls out as they round the next corner.

Tucked back along the building are a few more stalls. Their choice in location isn’t lost on Elena. This is where other sorts of deals take place. If it weren’t obvious from the grizzled men that leer at them, the crates of pistols, bolts of fine lace, and casks of wine are enough of a statement on their own.

“Aye, I’m here.”

Dread rings its alarm bell loud and clear inside her skull when Rhodes steps out from the group of men. From the corner of her vision, Elena sees several more men approach her from behind. “Very good,” Rhodes croons at Fran, dropping a few coins into her waiting palm.

“I also snagged us this. Figured we could rough it up a bit and pass it off as the Bonnie Prince’s.” From her satchel, she pulls out the dagger Elena eyed at the shop. “And that charm she’s wearin’, that could go for a fair bit o’ coin.”

The roof groans under the sudden onslaught of rain. Shoddy patch jobs let some of the water through, soaking the dry earth under their feet. Taking the blade from Fran, Rhodes tosses it between his hands, eyeing Elena all the while. That crooked smirk of his widens.

“Fran speaks the truth, ya know. I spoke with your captain not long before the storm. He told me a lovely tale about how he’s sailed the world looking for his love. It brought tears to my eyes, it really did.”

“Touching,” Elena all but spits back at him. She lifts her chin to keep her eyes on his. Her hand hovers above her sword’s hilt.

“Too many heartless bastards out there, he said, trying to pull one over on ‘im.”

Her eyebrows shoot up towards her hairline. “And you’re going to be different?”

“O’course. He’s been chasing after lies for far too long. The lad wants proof.” Rhodes strikes; he throws an arm across her chest and slams her back into the wall. Her face smacks against the rough stone; she tastes blood on her tongue. “So, I’m going to slice off one of those pretty fingers of yers, and if he don’t respond to that, I’ll keep sending him more until he--”

Elena spits in his face. He reaches to wipe it away and she ducks under his hold, using the muddy ground to slide from his next punch. Knocking his arm away, she slams her fist against his kidneys. Rhodes collapses to one knee and growls out a long string of curses.

“Send him one of yours instead,” she snarls.

Swiping the dagger from his hand, she twirls it and grips it tight before seizing his other hand. The blade slices clean through three of his fingers. His howl of pain disappears under a loud clap of thunder.

“You fucking--”

His insult never lands. With a quick snap of her knee, she knocks his head into the wall. He collapses in a heap, mottled with blood and muck. Elena bends down and wipes the blade on a clean patch of his shirt.

When she stands up, she finds Fran gone and the other men watching her from a few yards back. Sliding her new dagger into the sheath at her breast, she throws the men a mock salute and heads out into the storm.

------

She’s woken by the smell of blood.

Her hand goes up to attend to her nosebleed before she realizes the scent is a memory from her nightmare, the last dredges of it lingering in the confines of her quarters. Not wanting her bunkmates to wake to the sound of her crying, Elena climbs out and heads for the deck. With the skeleton crew this late at night, she has no trouble sneaking past them to reach her corner of solitude at the stern.

If she closes her eyes, she can pretend she’s aboard the Revenge. The salty ocean breeze and the rhythmic swaying of the ship could fool her so easily. When she opens her eyes, though, there is no Henry badgering her about trying his latest creation; no Charlie sauntering up with a bottle of rum; and no Edward drawing invisible lines between the stars to teach her the constellations.

The same stars she’s looking up at now, knowing that somewhere out there across the sea, he might be gazing at them, too.

The small pinpricks of light start to grow fuzzy. Elena folds her arms against the railing and buries her head in them, trying to muffle her crying. The idea of spending another month chasing after Edward is frustrating to no end. If this was her own time, she could just hunt him down on social media or track him down with a PI. Maybe it would be better if she planted her ass down on an island and waited for him, at this rate.

“Are you bawling because you killed him?”

Elena jolts up in surprise. Her ribs smack against the railing. Rubbing a hand over them to soothe the ache, she turns and glowers at Robert.

“I don’t remember inviting you to my pity party.”

“You didn’t. I crashed it.” Moving to stand beside her, he spends a long minute overlooking the dark ocean in front of them. Once she’s finished with trying to hide her tears, he asks again. “So, did you?”

“No.”

“A shame.”

Captain Delaney was the only one to ask about Rhodes when he didn’t return. When no one else responded, Robert mentioned that he decided to take a position on another ship. The lie -- and the fact that no one cared all that much for the man anyway -- seemed to work. Delaney promoted another sailor to Rhodes’s position, and that was that.

“I should’ve listened to you,” Elena laments, not-so-subtly wiping her tear-stained sleeve against her face. “This woman approached me and said she had information about Edward. I was baited -- hook, line, and sinker.”

His hands clench tight around the railing. “Love can make you do stupid things.”

“Are you speaking from experience?”

“Aye, actually, I am.”

“Bullshit,” she says. “You’ve never once mentioned someone important. You only wanted to come back for the freedom, the adventure -- you said so yourself. And I understand that, I really do. The adventure is why I stayed in the first place. I could’ve snuck into Edward’s cabin or seduced him for the compass like that,” she snaps her fingers for emphasis, ignoring Robert’s snort of disbelief. “But once I had the chance… I stayed. It became about more than the thrill of it.”

“Why is it that you younguns think love is only for the thirty-and-under crowd?”

“‘Younguns’?” Elena repeats with a grimace.

“I was trying out some of yer Texas slang.”

“Nobody says that.” When he opens his mouth to protest, she holds up a hand. “Okay, nobody who didn’t fight in the fucking Alamo. But -- seriously, I want to know. Is there someone…?” she trails off, encouraging him to open up.

Robert lets out a long, ragged sigh before digging into his coat. The compass in his hand is set into a simple wooden box, much less ornate than the previous one. Cradling the compass close to shield it from the wind, he digs a fingernail into a hidden switch and a small compartment slides open from the bottom. A twist of raven-colored hair falls into his palm, tied with a tiny length of twine. He traces his thumb across the coarse texture, his breathing unsteady.

“His name is Julien. We met in Panama City while searching for Sir Francis Drake’s treasure that he stole from the Nuestra Señora de la Concepción. Though we never did find the gold, we ended up running a ship together and stealing some of our own.” Without glancing down, Robert slips the lock of hair back into the compartment and snaps it closed. It’s telling how reflexive it is, as if he repeats the move a hundred times a day. “We didn’t want to deal with the Spanish anymore than we had to, so we sailed to St. Lucia. ‘Twas run by France at the time, and our contact out there bragged about running a smuggling route right under their noses. But when we arrived, we found him in a gibbet. He’d been there a good while. Julien only knew ‘twas him from the ugly, purple trousers he wore.”

Having seen the skeletons hanging along some of the ports, Elena is thankful she missed seeing the late stages of decomposition. “Not long after, we were captured by the French. We managed to escape, but were forced to separate in order to get our crew out. Being French himself, Julien had a better chance at disguising himself as a local. The last I saw of him was when he went back in to retrieve Charlie. And then,” he pauses to clear his throat, “she came out and he didn’t, and we had to escape the island or risk getting caught all over again. And his attempts would’ve been for nothing.”

Elena wants nothing more than to wrap her friend in a hug. Knowing that he’s not big on physical touch, though, she gives what comfort she can by placing her hand alongside his on the railing.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

“O’course you didn’t, because I never told you. Even in the future, there are places where our relationship would be met with the business end of a pistol.” Robert shrugs at the idea, but she can see in the set of his jaw how angry it makes him. “But even after I gained your trust and you told me about your past relationships, I felt like I still needed to keep him a secret. Old habits die hard, I suppose.”

“Tell me about him,” she requests.

With a quiet chuckle, Robert shakes his head.

“There isn’t enough time in the day to describe him, and I’m not one to wax poetic. But he is… kinder than me, certainly. A better shot than me, too. He’s the one who taught Charlie everything she knows. The chain I gave you, that’s for him.” He puts a hand up when Elena immediately reaches up to return it. “No, no -- that whistle is much too important. The chain isn’t the… I’ve already gotten a new one. I was hoping -- I have my grandfather’s ring that I would like him to wear. If he agrees, o’course.”

She suppresses the smile that wants to form at seeing Robert flustered.

“You’re referring to him in the… do you know if he’s alive? Where he is?”

“The last confirmed sighting of him was three years ago in Curaçao, a small island off the coast of Venezuela.”

Her brows knit together as she studies him. “Then why are you here, in the north?”

His shoulders sag with the weight of his sigh, though she can see the beginnings of a smirk on his lips.

“Because I made you a promise, remember? Last year, when we tried our hand at stealing the sceptre from the Crown Room. The only reason I’m not locked up in some Scottish ‘House of Special Purpose’ is because you came back for me. And I told you that I would stay by yer side until we found Edward.”

“I mean, if I had left you there, you would’ve just ratted me out as an accomplice.”

That gets a proper laugh from him. “True enough, but I’ll wager the thought never crossed yer mind, did it, kid?” Her small shrug is enough of a confirmation for him. “Julien’s somewhere out there, waiting for me,” he assures. “The man has the patience of a saint. So, I’ll be sticking with you ‘til then. Make sure you get home safe and all that.”

Annoyed at the night’s second round of tears trying to make their appearance, Elena keeps her eyes on the whitecaps in the distance.

“Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it.” In a rare show of friendship, Robert knocks his elbow against hers and jostles her from the railing. “Seriously, don’t. I do have a reputation to uphold.”

------

References:

The “House of Special Purpose” is another name for the Ipatiev House, where Emperor Nicholas II, his family, and members of their household were executed in 1918. To my knowledge, there is no Scottish version -- mostly because MI5 operates out of the Thames House in London.

#distant shores #edward x mc #edward mortemer #choices #distant shores fic #Kaila writes things #f: the way home

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hongism · 5 years ago

Text

finding beauty in your darkest places - chapter 4

Pairing: TBA (i have no clue at the moment, ot7 for now)

Genre: Psychiatric Clinic!au, Heavy Angst, Fluff

Word Count: 6898

Warnings: strong language; deals with mental and emotional illnesses and disorders as a heavy theme of the story, future graphic depictions of disorders - please do not read if this makes you uncomfortable

Rating: PG-13/Mature

Summary: Everyone has their issues, and everyone deals with them differently. Jungkook thinks that avoiding his problems is the best option out there.

aka

Jeon Jungkook is the newest patient at the Omelas Specialized Psychiatric Clinic, and he just wants to get in and out as quickly as possible so that he can go back to university and be with his friends again. Of course, that doesn't work out according to his plan.

a/n: you guys, huge shoutout to Mari, Em, and Ivory my lovely wordsprint buddies who were a huge support and inspiration to work alongside ;-; im honestly thrilled that i felt inspired to write this so soon and im even more excited to share it with you guys because i honestly love this chapter. i really hope you guys like it as much as i do! Also thank you so so much for such wonderful feedback on my survey, seeing your responses and reading through them makes my day! Feel free to go back and redo the survey whenever you want as the story progresses and things change~

ALSO

This bit is important too, because i want to make sure that it is clear and understandable.

The content of this story is heavy and difficult stuff. I am not writing it in a way that holds back from the ugly parts that are real life in these kinds of situations. It is dramatic because that is part of my vision with the story. I say that the genre is heavy angst because it is. It is heavy and dramatic and overwhelming at times because that’s the way life is. I completely understand if this isn’t your cup of tea, but please please do not complain about the heavy and dramatic nature of the story. I love you guys and i want you to love the story, but i also want to convey a message with this story and am taking the steps i believe are necessary to reach that goal. Please understand that before reading.

Chapter:

3 | 4 | 5

Finding Beauty in Your Darkest Places

Chapter 4: A Slip into the Darkness

...

“Rock, paper, scissors — ha, yes! Paper beats rock, I win.” Taehyung leans back, nearly falling off the stool he’s precariously perched on, and claps for his win over Jimin’s presented rock. Jungkook slouches on his own stool, arms folded under his head on the granite counter. He watches the exchange between Taehyung and Jimin with amusement. Jimin protests Taehyung’s win, saying something about how Taehyung didn’t play fair and they should play two out of three instead.

“What are you guys even playing for?” You ask as you place the butter knife in your hand down. Jungkook glances in your direction, noticing that you have six crackers already covered in peanut butter on your plate, but six more naked crackers still sit on the other half of the plate.

“Who gets to name the gang,” Taehyung explains. He leans over the counter and snatches one of the crackers off your plate, popping it into his mouth and smiling through the food. You don’t protest the action. Instead you blink at the spot on your plate where the cracker just was and shake your head. “And since I won, I get to name it!”

“What gang are you talking about? I didn’t even realize there was a gang in the first place.” You return to spreading peanut butter across your crackers while Taehyung sighs as though disappointed in your question.

“Us. We’re a gang now, right? Since we’ve been planning and doing all this covert stuff that no one else knows about?”

“Sure, we can be a gang if you want us to be.”

“Yay! Oh, now I need to think of a name for us. Our operation is ‘Find the Teddy Bear’, so we can be the Teddy Bear Gang.” Jimin stifles a laugh, pressing his lips together to hide the smile, and Jungkook just buries his face in the crook of his arm to hide the amusement spreading across his features. “Hey, don’t laugh at our gang name! This is important business. We have to be serious about it. Y/N, you don’t think it’s funny, right?”

“Hm? Oh, of course not.” Jungkook peeks over his arm to catch a glimpse of your face, and despite your claims, he finds a grin on your lips.

“You guys are mean. Flat out mean. I don’t appreciate this.” Taehyung huffs and sits back, crossing his arms over his chest as he does. “But I do appreciate all the stuff you guys are doing to help me. Have you learned anything new recently?”

“I’ve been asking around,” Jimin responds once he buries his laughter. “I talked with Eunbi, Hanuel, Miyeon, and Hyewon but none of them know anything.” Jungkook sits up at the mention of Hyewon, peering at the back of Jimin’s head. Did she mention anything about me? Anything about what happened a few days ago? No, Y/N promised that she would make sure no one found out. Did she stop Hyewon from saying anything before Jimin talked to her though? Is she even going to keep her word?

“I have enlisted the help of Seokjin.” You cut into the conversation, slicing through Jungkook’s thoughts at the same time. “He is going to talk with the nurses and see if any of them know anything. He said he would help Tuesday and today because he is on duty to help them sort through medications. Perfect time to ask questions.”

“Why couldn’t one of us do that though?” Jimin asks. He props an elbow up on the counter and rests his chin on a clenched fist. You pay no attention to Jimin or his question. Instead, you continue with your train of thought as though Jimin didn’t even open his mouth.

“He didn’t get much from Tuesday’s chat, but he confirmed that the nurses who were in Taehyung’s room at the time of the bear’s disappearance didn’t take the bear out. They changed the beds and that was it; the bear was already gone at that point.” A flash of silver crosses Jungkook’s vision, then a clatter resounds. You blink at the counter in a similar manner to the people across from you, staring at the knife that suddenly left your hand. “Anyways, another important thing to note is that today is laundry day.”

“Why is that important?” Jungkook inquires when no one else does.

“I have a plan to sneak into the laundry room. Any volunteers to help me?”

“Oh, me! I wanna go!” Taehyung’s hand shoots up, wiggling in the air above his head, and he grins at you. Eyes wide, you drag your gaze over him before shifting them over to someone else.

“Jungkook. Thanks for offering.”

“What?” It’s a chorus who echoes the simple word, Taehyung and Jimin speaking in unison while Jungkook falls a bit short and repeats after them.

“I’m sorry, Tae, but I really need you to be in the safest possible position. I can’t let you get in trouble because of me. It’s why we don’t eat together, and this is ten times worse than meal times.”

“Why would you rather throw Jungkook to the wolves then?” Jimin motions towards him, his hand hovering near Jungkook’s chest, and Jungkook shakes his head a few times. “Why don’t you just pick someone you don’t care about like me instead?” Eyes waver, your gaze flickers over Jimin, and Jungkook can’t catch the emotion that lingers there because it’s gone too quickly. Jimin’s lips fall into a frown, brows knitted together.

“It’s my plan, so I get to pick who goes with me. I pick Jungkook, and that’s that.”

A huff of air leaves Jimin’s lips before you finish speaking. He redirects his gaze to the counter under his hands.

“Okay, Jungkook, do you have some time? Let’s go discuss the plan.”

“Why can’t Jimin and I be in on the plan as well? That’s not fair.”

“Tae, I’m sorry. The less you know the better. If I get in trouble or caught for this, then they won’t be able to tie anything back to you if you don’t know anything. Even if they find some way to drag you into it, they won’t be able to get any information from you. Please trust me on this one, okay? I’ll make sure it won’t be a repeat of the fight.”

“I trust you,” Taehyung says. He drops his volume as he looks at you. “I do. I just want to make sure you’ll be safe too.”

“That’s why I’m bringing someone with me, and I’m sorry it can’t be you. I will be fine.” Taehyung doesn’t say anything in response and lets you walk away from the counter. You grab hold of Jungkook’s sleeve as you round the corner. “Come on. The sooner we get this sorted out, the better.” Jungkook hops out the stool and follows your lead back in the direction of the rooms. “Wait out here for a few minutes, Jungkookie. I need to have a quick chat with someone.” Turning on your heel at the mouth of the hallway, you motion for Jungkook to take a few steps back. He tilts his head to the side at your demand, confusion taking over, and it continues to seep through his body as you walk up to Hoseok’s door and knock a few times. “Try not to have another panic attack and puke on the floor.” You disappear into the room a moment later. Jungkook is left standing in the hallway wishing he was anywhere else because all he sees when he looks around are memories of the panic attack that struck a few days ago. The choking sensation.

Queasiness.

Drowning, drowning in a sea of darkness without end.

He shakes his head to clear the thoughts out, refocusing his eyes on the hallway. Fourteen tiles across, fourteen tiles from door to door, fourteen tiles from wall to wall. Half tiles in the doorways. Four of them. The menial task of counting grounds him, reminds him of the reality that surrounds him, and separates the darkness creeping in from the light ahead of him. Jungkook takes a deep breath as he stares forward, blinking into the brightness seeping in through the window at the end of the hallway. A door slides open, and it’s not Hoseok’s; rather it’s the room beside his. Jungkook realizes that he’s just standing in the middle of the hall and staring forward, which is probably a strange sight.

Platinum blonde hair bleeds together with the white on the walls. Hyewon steps out of the room, eyes on the floor as she slides the door shut again and starts walking in Jungkook’s direction. She maintains her pace as she passes him. If he’d never spoken to her before, he would let her keep walking, but now his hand reaches out and grabs hold of her wrist. What follows next happens in an instant; however, in Jungkook’s mind, it seems to occur in slow-motion, Hyewon’s blonde hair whipping through the air while she turns to face him.

“What the hell are you doing?” She yells as soon as his fingers touch her skin. Jungkook retracts his arm as though burned and blinks at her with wide eyes. Silence hangs between them for a few moments before Hyewon’s features relax, the anger ebbing away as her brows return to a normal position. “I—uh, sorry about that. You caught me off guard, and I wasn’t expecting that.”

“No, no, it’s my fault,” Jungkook insists, bringing his hands up. “I should’ve said something or…not grabbed you like that? Um, I just want to apologize for the other day and behaving the way I did when you tried to help me. It was — I was rude and insensitive. I should’ve been nicer? Yea. I was going through a tough time right then, you caught me at the wrong moment, but that shouldn’t be an excuse for my attitude or the way I treated you.” Jungkook doesn’t know what he is expecting from Hyewon in terms of her reaction; a smile and cheerful laugh is not on his mind at all though. She grins, eyes finding his, and lets a bright laugh fall from her lips.

“I didn’t hold it against you, you know. In my mind, your reaction made sense and was justified in the moment. I was the one pushing a bit hard for answers. To reassure you though, I’ve done the same thing, so it doesn’t make you a bad person or anything like that. I mean, look at how I reacted when you touched my arm. If you ever do want to talk, my offer still stands and I’d always be willing to listen.”

“Why though?” Jungkook can’t help but to ask the question, because her insistence to help him is something foreign to him.

"Well," she starts, gaze finding the ceiling as she speaks, "when I came in, I didn't feel like I had anyone to talk to, and there are times when I still feel that way, but I believe that it's important to open up rather than bottle everything inside. If you keep it locked up all the time then nothing good will come from that, right?" Jungkook glances over her soft features, the gleam in her eyes bright. "Ah, sorry for rambling a bit and making a hasty exit, but I have an appointment to go to actually. I'll catch you around though! If you need me, you can probably find me in my room or somewhere nearby." Hyewon turns to leave, but Jungkook doesn't let her go without saying something in response first.

"You're really nice and kind-hearted, Hyewon!" He calls out to her back. She grins at him over her shoulder. "I'm surprised to find a person like that here." Hyewon only laughs, eyes disappearing behind crescent shaped eyelids. She waves at him before returning to walking away, and Jungkook stares at the back of her head. How can a person like that be friends with people like Mingyu and Yesung? Is it a facade?

"You done hitting on other patients?"

"Shit!" Jungkook flinches as you speak, unaware that you opened the door and stepped out. You snort at his reaction and cover your mouth when the unprecedented noise leaves your mouth. "I wasn't hitting on her; it's called being nice."

"Being nice? What's that?" You poke your tongue out, toying with the corner of your lips while you grin at Jungkook. "It's all a joke, Jungkookie. Learn how to take one." You pull your tongue back between your lips, click it against the roof of your mouth, then start walking down the hallway. Jungkook jogs to catch up with her.

"Di-Did your talk go well?"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"The—I mean your talk with Hoseok," Jungkook clarifies. His throat constricts a bit after he speaks, suddenly aware of how this might come across to you. You stop walking to face him, one brow raised.

"You have zero concept of privacy."

"And you were just eavesdropping on my conversation with Hyewon."

"Cute, Jungkookie, but you were having said conversation in a public and open hallway. It didn't seem like you were trying to hide the conversation in any way." With your retort, Jungkook realizes that he's losing the fight.

"Sorry, I won't ask about your personal life again."

"I highly doubt that, but okay."

"Can I ask you a question about Hoseok though?" You roll your eyes, visibly debating the question, but Jungkook doesn't wait for your permission. "Namjoon told me a bit about him a few days ago, but I've been wondering…why does he never talk to other patients? And stay in his room all the time?"

"What demon has possessed you?" You ask. "Why do you want to know so badly? Do you not have the ability to drop the subject and mind your own business?"

"I feel like I need to know because I need to know when I'm overstepping my bounds with other patients." Your gaze turns into a glare as you squint at him. Jungkook racks his brain for the right words to say that might convince to talk about it. "Uh, on the—on the first day I was here, you said…you said something about sticking to the truth. Honesty is the best policy." A laugh tears through your chest.

"You are nothing but trouble, Jeon Jungkook." You point to the door to your left then grab hold of the handle and slide it open. "Go on in." He does as asked, unsure of what to expect inside her room. Even though it's the same basic structure and layout as Jungkook's room, yours contains more decorations, including dark curtains over the windows and a few rugs scattered across the floor. There's only one bed in your room too, as well as a desk in the corner, but the thing — or things in reality — that catches most of Jungkook's attention are all the stuffed animals strewn over your mattress. There are at least six, if not more; Jungkook can't see the exact amount due to the unmade state your bed is in. When you catch his looking, you stab his shoulder with your index finger. "You better not make any smart-ass comments."

"Of course not!" He raises his arms in defense as you sidestep him to go to your desk. He stands awkwardly in the entrance of your room, right in front of the door that you closed, and watch as you snatch a pen off your desk and stick the end of it in your mouth. Plopping down on the rug in front of your bed, you motion at the empty space in front of you.

"Look," you say as he seats himself across from him, "I am only going to tell you about Hoseok because everyone else her knows and maybe you'll feel special or something by knowing. Hoseok…isn't a new patient by any means, but he hasn't been around for a long time when compared to other patients here. For the first couple weeks after he got here, everyone thought he was fine and that nothing was wrong with him. No one understand why he was admitted here since there were no signs of anything being an issue. He was bright and loud, enthusiastic, optimistic, always talking to everyone he encountered." You hesitate, tugging on the pen in between your teeth, and gaze at something in the corner of the room. "Well, that was all a lie, an act really, and he was just trying to hide what was really going on in his mind. After…after things got more clear? I don't know how to word it, but his behavior made more sense once the mask started to crack. The little oddities he had — strange and random behavior, a weird sense of speech, constant confusion — they all started to add up and pile on top of each other. It seemed to happen so quickly that it was had to accept that the person we had grown accustomed to was actually nothing like that in reality. He still interacted with the others at that time, but the bubbly personality disappeared. He was…flat. Blank, didn't show much emotion, didn't speak much and whenever he did it was nonsense either grammatically or entirely unrelated to anything. It's—there were too many symptoms to list, and those things combined with his other disorder — the behaviors contradict each other, but the disorders make sense together.

"And, you know, it wouldn't be surprising if everyone in this clinic suffers from depression, but since his is atypical, it feels so different than anything else I've encountered. It's sad and unfortunate because Hoseok may never get to leave this place. Cases like his rarely get better, and there's not much Omelas can do for him. With a hopeless case, sometimes it seems like they aren't trying to do anything for him. I honestly don't feel bad for many people, but I do for Hoseok. He's sweet and nice, probably the nicest person I've ever met. It isn't his fault that he has to deal with the issues he has, and it isn't fair either. Someone so pure and kind — he doesn't deserve that kind of pain and suffering. It makes me wonder how things like that can happen to such a good person."

You pause to take a few deep breaths, eyes fluttering shut. Jungkook doesn't make a sound, and he's not sure he's even breathing at this point. Even with your eyes squeezed shut, your expression seems so melancholic that it hurts to look at your face, so Jungkook stares at his lap instead. The image before him is a dark and blurry one, an image it feels like he shouldn’t be looking at or witnessing.

"Before coming to Omelas, I didn't really care about anyone except myself. No one was important in my mind, and there wasn't anything who deserved my time because of constantly being let down. Now that I've been here though, surrounded by many people like Hoseok and Taehyung, I can't help but to feel for them. I wish there was more I could do to help them, because they deserve that. I know I'm not in a position to help them in all honesty, nor am I a person who can provide that for them. I’m not a good person, not someone anyone should look up to. I make a lot of mistakes, and yes every person does, but it’s—it’s just different. They don’t need a person like me in their lives, but it’s too difficult to just walk away from them." Jungkook reckons it’s like a landslide — the slippery slope he’s falling down — and at the bottom is your deepest, darkest place. Your guard is down, the brick walls Jungkook has found around you are not standing right now, and so when he asks his next question, he keeps his volume low as though it will keep you in the vulnerable position.

"Is that why you do things for them, like getting Taehyung the teddy bear and talking with Hoseok?"

"Yea, whatever good it does. Hoseok tries to be alone all the time, but I know that he doesn't actually like it. He stays alone because he thinks it's for the good of other people. For him personally, however, it's not good. Everything is difficult for him. Maybe by visiting him when I can and talking to him when no one else makes an effort to, I'm doing something good. If it is, then I think it's the only good thing I can do. I always come up short, yet when I’m helping them, it feels like I’ve been given a chance to fix things."

"That's not true though. Everything you do for Taehyung, and all—”

"Fuck," you cut Jungkook off, eyes snapping open. The grief-stricken expression drops from your features, and you replace it with a blank slate, hiding your vulnerability again. You toy with the pen in your mouth, twirling it a bit with your tongue as you stab a finger in Jungkook's direction. "I swear, Jeon, if you breathe a word about this—”

"I won't, I won't. Don't worry." Jungkook reassures you.

"Good. Now we need to discuss the plan for the laundry room heist tonight. That was the whole point of coming here, but you distracted me."

"Why did you choose me to help? Jimin said he would've gone."

"Have you already forgotten our deal?" Jungkook purses his lips and leans back.

"I want confirmation that you've done your part first," he requests. You scoff.

"We already made the deal."

"I-"

"No one has brought it up or mentioned it, right? So I've done my part. Even the nurses don't know. I took the bullet for you and said that I was the one who vomited in the hallway. I sure wish I could've seen Mingyu's reaction when he saw it outside his door though. That would've been fucking hilarious." You laugh to yourself, and Jungkook relents, trusting that your words are honest. "Besides, the deal was that I would keep it a secret and in return, you would do four favors for me. I didn't really want to use one of those favors on this, but that's why I asked for four and not three. I assumed you may not want to do this."

"I have no problem with doing this though. I was just curious as to why you picked me over Jimin."

"Well if you're on board, then I get to keep the favor for later. I'm sure I can figure something out." Jungkook opens his mouth to ask one more time about Jimin, but you continue speaking and he doesn't have the opportunity to. "The nurses collect all laundry from the rooms starting at 8 p.m., then work on it until curfew at 11. They do rounds to make sure everyone is in their rooms, finishing at 11:15, and go to their side of the ward to sleep or do whatever they do over there. Now, we need to meet at 11:27 on the dot, because the cameras in the hall will catch us otherwise. At 11:27, there is a break in the cameras' recordings because of a glitch. Two and a half minutes. That's all the time we have to get to the laundry room before the cameras come back on and recover from the glitch. We can search the laundry and stuff for Taehyung's bear for as long as we need to, but if it isn't there then we have a problem, because that means it could be in someone else's room or hidden somewhere else. If we can't find it in the laundry room, we'll search the kitchen as well. No one usually looks in or uses the cabinets since there's a pantry, but if Mingyu truly is the one who took it, he might hide it there. And if not, then we'll have to regroup and think about other possibilities tomorrow. Everything make sense so far?"

"Yep, crystal clear."

"Good. Now, the cameras in the kitchen have a blind spot, so if we push the fridge a little bit then it will cover the camera view enough for us to do what we need to do in the kitchen without being seen. It would be best if we move the fridge before tonight though, otherwise it might look a bit too suspicious. As for getting back to our rooms without the cameras catching us, there is only one other time where there's a glitch, and that's at 3:33 a.m. We will have to kill some time if we finish early and wait it out."

"How are we gonna kill that much time?" Jungkook asks, unsure of how long this whole operation is going to take. It shouldn't take long at all to search the laundry or the kitchen. There's no way.

"Of course we can sit in the dark and talk about our feelings."

"What?"

"Man, you have a terrible sense of humor. Terrible. You're going to be responsible for moving the fridge by the way. We should go back to the kitchen now to move it, because I have an appointment soon. We aren't going to talk about this again — especially not at dinner. You can't say a word to Yoongi or Namjoon or Seokjin. Taehyung doesn't need to know the plan either, okay? All in agreement?"

"Ye-Yea, it's just a lot of information at once," Jungkook admits. He rubs the expanse of skin between his brows and tries to recall the whole plan, but he can't remember the exact timing of things and it's fuzzy already.

"I can do a recap when we meet up tonight. 11:27, remember that much for now." You tug the pen out of your mouth, cradling it between your index and middle fingers, and stand up. "Come on, let's head back." You toss the pen onto your desk, and Jungkook hurries to join you by the door, nearly tripping over the rug as he gets to his feet. He trails a few feet behind you while the two of you walk until you start talking again, then he jogs to fall into step with you. "Say, Jungkookie, can I ask you a personal question?"

"Uh, no thank you?" Jungkook responds, but he has a nasty feeling that you are going to prod for answers no matter what he says. In fact, you laugh at his response, then --

"What do you have?" Jungkook chokes on air even though he knows he should've expected such a question from you. "I have some ideas, and I've been doing more thinking since finding you in the hallway. To be transparent, I've never seen something like that out of other patients. Although, I'm not the most observant person so that means nothing."

"It's anxiety. That's all," Jungkook says through gritted teeth. He doesn't want to continue a conversation on the subject, and frankly, he doesn't want to have it with you of all people because you saw him in his most vulnerable state of existence. You don't put the topic to rest, however.

"You gotta clarify. There are five major types of anxiety disorders and then tons of subtypes within each one as well. Hell, I can say I've got 'anxiety' but that doesn't really mean anything since there are so many options under that umbrella."

"Why do you want to know?" You huff at his question and fold your arms over your chest.

"I'm nosy, okay?"

Jungkook doesn't follow up with anything else, and maybe if he stays quiet, you won't continue to pry for answers. Please don't ask again. Just drop it. Is this some sort of punishment for asking you personal questions?

"Oh, Namjoon, you're here!"

Sure enough, as the two of you step into the kitchen, Jungkook's gaze falls on Namjoon, who sits at the counter with a spiral journal set out before him. The man looks up when you call his name and pauses his careful strokes to greet you with a dimpled smile. You return the smile, joining him at the counter and sitting beside him without hesitation. Jungkook on the other hand freezes in place and blinks between you and the fridge. If the only reason in coming to the kitchen was to move the fridge, then you both are screwed now because of Namjoon's presence.

"What are you two up to?" Namjoon inquires. A tapping noise accompanies his words, pen finding purchase again the counter top.

"We ran into each other when leaving our rooms," you explain without batting a lash. How can you lie so easily? And to one of your friends at that? Jungkook swallows, fighting the lump that swells in his throat.

"And you happened to be heading in the same direction?" Perhaps Namjoon sees through the lie, or his intuition tells him something that Jungkook's doesn't, or maybe he's simply known you long enough to be able to recognize when you are lying.

"Well, I was coming to get the peanut butter crackers I made earlier, but Taehyung must have snagged them since they're gone." Jungkook glances at the counter and notices that you're telling the truth about that at the very least. There are no traces of your plate, the crackers, or the peanut butter — the knife has disappeared as well, and Jungkook laughs at the idea that Taehyung stole all of it while you were gone. "Jungkook was only walking with me because I was being nosy and asking a lot of personal questions."

Namjoon heaves a deep sigh and halts his pen tapping in favor of side-eyeing you. He doesn't comment on it though. You offer a forced smile to defend yourself before redirecting your attention to Jungkook.

"Oh, you didn't finish telling me what branch of anxiety you have."

Namjoon coughs, Jungkook glares at you, and you simply keep grinning like a Cheshire without a care in the world. Dammit what kind of game are you playing? Jungkook clears his throat. The heat is travelling up his spine and through his limbs, leaving his fingers cold and shaky. Namjoon's focus is on Jungkook as well now, no thanks to you, and the weight of all the attention cripples him. He fights to breathe and carefully swallows each gulp of air like he's never breathed before.

"Panic Disorder," he chokes out at last.

"Neat," you say. And that's all. You add nothing else to the simple spoken word, and it nags at the pit already growing in Jungkook's stomach. The vulnerable girl he saw not too long has disappeared. The replacement reminds him of the devil, a demon without care or remorse, because that sickly sweet smile sticks to your lips like glue. If he thought he had you figured out, Jungkook would have to backtrack on everything he's learned about you so far. All the behaviors and mannerisms he thought he could attribute to you permanently are out the window. He doesn't know you, doesn't know anything about you, can't decipher which parts are real and which are the roles you play to throw him off.

"Y/N, don't be mean about it," Namjoon chastises. He flicks your arm, and you retaliate with a soft 'ow', rubbing the skin where he hit you. "It must have taken a lot for him to admit that. The last thing he needs is for you to treat him like a joke. Jungkook, I empathize with you and understand that your struggles must be pretty tough. Being in a new place like this with such…eccentric people around you probably doesn't help much either."

"Thanks…” Jungkook trails off, and embarrassment starts to settle in over the anxiety bubbling in his chest.

"Hey, I get it. It's probably easy for you to feel overwhelmed or like you're drowning, but as far as I can tell from the albeit short amount of time we've interacted, you seem to manage it well. Even so, I think you should be a bit more willing to be vulnerable. Not with Y/N — no offense, but also some offense intended."

"Wow rude, Joon. My heart is hurt."

"Anyways, I'd love to help in whatever way I can. I'm sorry if I've gotten somewhat annoying because I don't answer most of your questions and tell you off for asking so many questions. I'm always willing to be a helping hand though, or a listening ear for when you need it." Namjoon doesn't break his gaze with Jungkook. The younger can't help but to compare Namjoon's offer to Hyewon's earlier one. The overlap is uncanny, and if Jungkook didn't know better, he would almost assume that Namjoon and Hyewon discussed this beforehand. Namjoon, however, just contains that warmth and kindness in him; Jungkook saw it the day he came to the clinic, and it hasn't faltered except for two times. The morning of the fight between you and Mingyu, and when Jungkook asked him about your relationship with Yoongi. Namjoon nudges your side with his elbow all the sudden, breaking his stare with Jungkook.

"You should return the personal answer with one of your own. It's only fair, and it would satiate the poor boy's endless curiosity." Namjoon surely knows what Jungkook would ask you about, especially since it's one of the only questions he has ever asked Namjoon in relation to you. Seeing as Namjoon answered his other questions, that leaves the one. The glance Namjoon exchanges with Jungkook confirms his suspicions as well. Why does he want me to bring that up again? Last time he got defensive and angry with me for asking.

You narrow your eyes at Namjoon's suggestion, and Jungkook can see the way your jaw shifts even from the distance he's at.

Namjoon flashes his dimples your way, taking in the serious expression on your face, then laughs.

"You would never honestly answer a personal question or allow such a question to be asked though."

"You aren't wrong, but I am still awfully curious about what his question would be." You shift your chin in Jungkook's direction, but he can't look at you while Namjoon's gaze bears into his skull. The man shakes his head slightly even though you can't see him. Jungkook knows it's a warning. He knows Namjoon is telling him not to ask. Yet you are presenting a golden opportunity on a silver platter, and Jungkook is greedy. This chance — Jungkook doesn't want to pass it up.

"I would ask about Yoongi and your relationship with him." His voice starts confident, but it dies to a mutter as he sees the way Namjoon's expression shifts.

"If you'll excuse me, I just remembered that I agreed to give Hanuel a book, so I should go take care of that." The stool slides against the tile floor, and a hideous scraping noise rises as it does, Namjoon standing and snapping his journal shut. He doesn't wait for you or Jungkook to offer a farewell or speak at all and makes a hasty exit. If he didn't think Y/N would answer the question, why would he leave?

"I'm sorry, Jeon, but I don't recall that being any of your business. You shouldn't be asking things like that. How many times will I have to repeat myself?"

"You said that you wan—”

"You see, here's the thing. I told you this the first day — the first damn day — and then I reminded you four days ago after your panic attack. Don't. Just don't. Some things will get you in trouble, and some information is withheld for your own good." The illumination in your eyes turns dull as you speak, words leaving your lips with a sharper tone.

"You said that you wanted to know what question I would ask." Jungkook defends his actions, unsure as to why you got so furious all the sudden. "That's all I was doing. I wasn't asking for answers, or expecting them, because Namjoon said you wouldn't answer."

"Okay, fine. You don't need to get all defensive. Just move the fridge now while no one is around."

Jungkook sighs at your response and turns to the fridge. "How much do I need to move it?"

"Four or five inches away from the wall, maybe slant it to the right a bit too."

Jungkook follows your orders without complaint. What is her problem? She said she wanted to know, and all I did was tell her.

"Look, do you want to know why that would be my question? I can tell you the reason if that's why you're upset."

"Who said I was upset? But go ahead and enlighten me, Jungkook."

"I don't know anything about Yoongi. I can't approach him, I don't know what his personality really is like behind the stony front he puts up, and I have no clue how to get on his good side. From what I've seen so far, nothing about your relationship makes sense, even as a friendship. Mingyu and Yesung obviously mentioned Yoongi for a reason, and Yesung asked something too specific that had implications of something besides a friendship. It's not th—”

"I don't want to talk about it."

"I am not asking you to!" Jungkook retorts. He is just as surprised as you are at the volume and vehemence behind his tone. Taking a moment to breathe, Jungkook returns to speaking in a calmer manner. "I simply don't understand a lot of things, and this is one of them. How can you be friends with him when he doesn't do anything to defend you or help you. He did nothing when Yesung and Mingyu verbally attacked you."

"You think I can't fight my own battles? Am I weak to you? Complacent and helpless without a man to back me up? You don't understand and frankly you wouldn't even if someone spelled it out for you." You stand as you speak, leaving the comfort of the stool and stepping away from the counter. "That's not how it works."

"That's not how what works?"

"We are going to carry through with the plans for tonight," you say and blatantly ignore the question Jungkook posed.

"Any time I confront you with something personal, you run away." He regrets the words when you turn around, the fury in your eyes making his blood run cold. Your eyebrows lift as your eyes widen, and the scowl across your lips is nothing short of terrifying.

"Excuse me? That isn't running away from confrontation. It's keeping my private and personal life that way. You aren't a part of that, and I have zero intention of bringing you into my personal life in the future. You don't know me, Jeon Jungkook, and I don't know you. We are simply two people at the same clinic who interact with each other out of necessity. You are nothing but a means to an end. I am in this for myself. I couldn't care less about your side of things, and I am being fucking honest about that too. This is fairly simple, Jungkook. Get your nose out of my business, keep your head down, and do your part of the deal. I won't say it again."

The words bite at his skin, a pinprick sensation all over his body. Nothing but a means to an end. He doesn’t know which version of you is the real one. Nothing. In your eyes, Jungkook is meaningless. Nothing new, no change, and no different from every other hell hole I’ve set foot in. You don’t care about him, and that much is clear. He is merely a fresh fish in the sea of familiarity around you. Since he knows nothing, you can use that against him and everyone else in the clinic.

It shouldn’t hurt as badly as it does, because you have a valid point. Jungkook doesn’t know you, and you don’t know him. The two of you may as well be strangers, like the next door neighbors who merely know each other’s names or the two students who pass one another in the hallway.

“I understand,” Jungkook says through the swell in his throat.

“Good,” you mutter back, head ducked away from Jungkook so he can’t see your face. When you walk away, your pace is slow, and you drag your feet as though unsure of the movements. A glance over your shoulder before you disappear from Jungkook’s sight. Once he can’t see you anymore, he squeezes his eyes shut to block out the image of your expression.

Slam.

A clenched fist makes contact with the side of the fridge, and it trembles under the force of Jungkook’s attack. He brings the same hand up to his forehead, pressing hard against the skin between his eyes in an attempt to alleviate the pressure building up there. It’s in that moment that he realizes the version of you he witnessed in your room — the vulnerable one who spoke without a care — that was not your darkest place. Your darkest place is the version of you that parades throughout the clinic with a mask over you, and Jungkook has to figure out how to face that reality.

...

written by: jungtaeyoongles

a/n: take the survery here!

consider sending me a ko-fi!!

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

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renibsance · 7 years ago

Note

Mods, what other RPGmaker games do you play? Right now I'm playing OFF.

mod mary: you know, now that i think about it, im not actually into a whole lot of them? i adore the witchs house (and i forced mod red to play it with me ikdjfbnbnkgf) and then i also love yume nikki! ive been meaning to play to the moon, because i watched a playthrough *years* ago and literally the only thing i can remember is that i was sobbing by the end haha! i actually downloaded OFF just recently, but i didnt get very far and im not sure whether ill play it again or not. i hope ur enjoying it!!

mod red: well, i haven’t played so many, only ib and the witch’s house! (both with mod mary uwu) but i’ve watched a few including paranoiac and the crooked man! if you have any recommendations let me know! ^-^

#answers #mod post #mod red #mod mary #text

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jiminnamoro · 7 years ago

Text

i got tagged in a few games ♡ since they’re quite long im gonna hide the whole thing sdhfhshfs feel free to tag me in whatever really these make me v happy! im tagging @yoingo @tumbleweed-of-doom and @myotpschoseme

so i was tagged by @princechae thank u puppy ♡

1. Who is your current Monsta X bias? if you follow me and you haven't figured it out yet...im not doing a good job....i dont know what to tell you..um......

2. Who was your first bias in Monsta X? minhyuk! for like....three days...then wonho made me sit in a dark room and showed me a powerpoint presentation called ‘101 reasons why you should stan me and only me part 1’ so like... he convinced me and here we are

3. Favorite Monsta X song? sjdjfhsahfhs i dont know :( dramarama? from zero? both

4. Who is your Monsta X bias wrecker? minhyuk

5. What is your favorite Monsta X music video? fighter. bc of wonhos iconic hairstyle

6. What were your thoughts when you watched No Mercy? they rlly grew up a lot :(

7. Favorite Monsta X meme?

but also can we not forget wonhos iconic ‘drop the beat’ /dabs

8. How long have you been a Monbebe? around....two years maybe...i’m not sure

9. What is your favorite Monsta X album? the clan pt 2.5 aka beautiful

10. If you could befriend one member of Monsta X who would it be? cant i choose all of them :( um ok id say wonho bye

11. If you could marry one member of Monsta X who would it be? if i say wonho one more time i know yall will kill me but. wonho

12. How did you fall in love with Monsta X? i saw the hero mv... and i thought it was a bop....now im doomed but boi it was worth it

13. Favorite Ship? minhyuk x wonho

i was also tagged by this tiny bub @drunkennessmv thank u!!

music shuffle tag!

rules: put all of your phone’s music library – no playlists! – on shuffle. list the first ten songs that play. bold the song(s) that lift your mood and italicise the song(s) that makes you the most emotional. then tag ten people!

piccolo fiore dove vai by teppisti dei sogni fire by bts spider by vixx johnny and mary by kisses tropical night by monsta x hero (jpn version) by monsta x love me right by exo you win again by bee gees witch by boyfriend what you like by lee gikwang

kpop tag!

rules: answer the questions!!

1) 5 favorite groups? monsta x, sf9, boyfriend, snuper, vixx

2) top 5 on your bias list? wonho, yoo taeyang, junhyung, ravi, wonho again because he deserves two places

3) ult bias group and why you love them? monsta x!! bc...bc.....bc they make me feel an enormous range of emotions...and they always manage to cheer me up and stanning wonho really changed me as a person and i’m grateful

4) ult bias and why you love them? listen wonho really is That guy you completely fall head over heels for...hes just.....so childish but so sweet and hard working and empathic and kinda shy sometimes and hes a dork and overall hes a grown baby but he SUCKS at hiding his emotions and i think this makes him so human and hes so handsome and if the mere idea that a more handsome boy even exists crosses your mind...youre wrong goodnight

5) favorite kpop meme: isn't hyungwon already a living meme? also this pic bc same

6) favorite pic of your ult? (I dare you to only pick one) this question gave me a headache

7) 10 favorite kpop mvs

o sole mio by sf9

fighter by monsta x

love me right by exo

danger by taemin (B ITCH)

beautiful liar by vixx LR

crooked by g dragon

bounce by boyfriend

chained up by vixx

all in by monsta x

easy love by sf9

8) 10 favorite kpop songs? (not in order)

dramarama by monsta x

mamma mia by sf9

call your name by jbj

a lie by b1a4

from zero by monsta x

somebody else by se7en

platonic love by snuper

empty by winner

good night by boyfriend

error by vixx

9) favorite kpop crack video? im not fond of those

10) favorite content creator within the fandom? @wonhone

11) what fandoms would you say you’re an active member of? only mx

12) take your top 3 biases- fmk or kiss marry kill

fuck: minhyuk marry: wonho kill kiss softly: taeyang

13) if you could be best friends with any idol, who would you choose? id choose......... wonho

14) If you could date any idol, who? :))

15) what’s one kpop album you think everyone should have listened to? the code by monsta x

16) are you a soft or a hard stan? as hard as steel

17) an idol that makes you go into soft mode? yoo taeyang :(

18) an idol that makes you want to smash the empire state building with one single punch? ravi sdfghfsg

19) favorite vocalist? kim sungkyu

20) favorite rapper: jooheon obviously

21) Favorite dancer? have you guys seen mr yoo taeyang? like?? in roar?? bitch

22) Things you have in common with your ult? we are both childish..soft..kind of quiet sometimes...we both eat ramen when theres no better food at home... we change hairstyle quite often...we have a mole near the belly button...we have piercings n tattoos.. we are perfectionists.. we both own a shit ton of chokers...yea

23) The most beautiful trait any idol can have? beauty is subjective

24) Songs that will always make you jam along? mirotic by dbsk bitch NO TEARS @ THE CLUB

25) Your worst wrecker? minhyuk

26) Any kpop concerts you’ve been to? boyfriend in paris!! i saw highlight, snuper, knk and exid in london!! and vixx in milan!!

27) Favorite choreo? all in maybe? or stuck?

28) Favorite live performance? this one bitch im shaking

29) Favorite debut mv? trespass!!!!

30) Recommend a rookie group: i dont rlly know :(

31.) A kpop song you could listen to every day for the rest of your life? easy love by sf9 totally

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llamasgotoheaven · 7 years ago

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Hattori, Inazuma, Hatchan !!!!!!!!

Hattori -Tell us about your OTP(s)

Zorobin ;——;The ship of ships. Power couple. Beautiful. Amazing. Bliss.Mutual support and respect. Not super obvious, not touchy feely people who would die for each other??? Give each other space but communicate effectively where it rly matters??? Not joined at the hip, two wholes who go together like peas in a pod.so. Beautiful next to one another. I’ll take 💯 👌✅✅✅👌💞‼️. HONESTLY??? Robin has been on the run her ENTIRE. LIFE. Imagine if she was in a committed relationship or even marriage w a man who was sworn to protect all of his family (nakama) and looked out extra hard for her cause she is constantly a walking target. It’s a match made in heaven. She can teach him to love a little more and get better at accepting love, help him chill and build up his neglected intellect a bit to go with the brawn, (maybe even imbue him w tricks to not get lost as much ??? Who knows). Additionally he can make her feel not just appreciated… But worthy of being in a long term relationship with a great man ??? Who isn’t abusive or creepy to her ???? The way that most men probably have been in her life ??? Seeing as she has worked for crooks ??? I LOVE HOW SHE KNOWS HE’S NOT STUPID AND NEVER MAKES FUN OF HIS MIND LIKE THE OTHERS, DESPITE HIM NOT BEING VERY BOOKISH. Zoro probably gets really sick of being condescended and I think Robin is the first crewmate that doesn’t actively make him the butt of jokes.

They’re just so damn… functional lusty hetero fantasy like??? How can u not love it

She is so n i c e to Zoro and he gets so bewildered like there’s fucking blush on her face in the manga when she first smiles at him it’s small but A D O R A B L E. She also is so happy for him in Dressrosa arc when he ups his game as a swordaman it’s… wholesome

OK LOOK how much calmer zoro has been as a character since after enies Lobby it’s almost 👀 👀 👀 like he wants to impress her and act more mature … . But he is also concerned with her wellbeing.

he n the crew fuckin busts her out of a death sentence but HE TAKES LIKE. A HUGE CHUNK OF THAT INITIATIVE WHICH IS SO UNUSUAL FOR HIM. HE FUCKING … STANDS AT THE FRONT OF THE RESCUE PARTY’S TRAIN TO ENIES LOBBY… Oda….. Buddy.HE GETS THE KEY TO THE CUFFS THAT GRANTS HER FREEDOM

He gets super PISSED OFF AND PROTECTIVE WHEN PEOPLE HARM ROBIN. He wasn’t even angry in battle when mihawk slashed his chest in two like ????? ZORO has like a record of being respectful towards women but ive never seen him be so…. Protective of one. It’s almost like he’s afraid she’ll vanish from his grip just like Kuina did in like an instant

ITS CANON HE SPRUNG

FUCK PPL WHO DISAGREE

THEY SAVE EACH OTHERS LIVES DIRECTLY MORE THAN ANY OTHER NAKAMA

Like when he’s flustered that he wasn’t acting cool enough for her when she won’t agree to dock onto Franky…

LIKE LITERALLY?B i t chThey’re both goth ass divas !

“They just save wach other a lot cuz they’re powerful Dani”

YA SURE BUT ODA HAS NARRATIVE POWER AND TONS OF STRONG PROTAGS TO USE FOR DRAMATIC MOMENTS AND YET…. Repeating motif 👀 👀 Zoro and Robin looking out for each other in battle and out of battle. Robin trying to nurture the crew member everyone is afraid of bc she probably remembers what it’s like to feel distanced from people around you and having them assume you’re a monster because you appear a certain way. (See: Her whole life. That’s probably why the two of them get along w Chopper so well! He was also treated like a monster too!) Zoro telling Sanji to leave her alone several times. Zoro getting distracted by her during fights w Kaku and super eager to get her back. Literally ive never seen so much hinting at romance in OP!!! She ain’t his sister or mother figure I can tell you that.

They’re like relatives my ass. Oda’s gonna mary them in the epilogue you wait and watchWait and watch _(´ཀ`」 ∠)_

-skypeia-pre Water 7 when aokiji fucks em up-Enies Lobby-thriller bark-Sabody-Fishman Island-Dressrosa

/\SO MUCH CANON SUPPORT BETWEEN THEM

WHEN SHE SNOOPS ON WHY HE’S DEATHLY INJURED I POST THRILLER BARK FUCKIN … DECOMPOSED FROM JOy A LITTLE i love 💕 zoro and robin

😭 😭 😭

Im still Chelley trash as well after all these years omfg

Inazuma - Can you post a selfie?

Im in app so probably no

Hatchan - Do you forgive people easily

That depends how far their bs extends honestly Some people are better left out of your life as much as humanly possible

#long post #WRITE HALF A PAGE OF OTP BS #ASK MEME #one piece #once i start on abt the otp I can’t shut up #gOd #compare zoro’s treatment of robin to his treatment of nami there is a bigass difference tbh #compare robin’s treatment of zoro to her treatment of sanji and luffy like....#bitch they are in love whether they know it or not #they like ... are so fucking tough but take such care of each other and im WEAK #ruf1ohn1tram #ask #op shipping

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thelemoncollection · 5 years ago

Text

Today is the 28th of April, but it's nearly 30 minutes past midnight. So the day was Monday the 27th, and I'm realizing I last wrote about a week ago? Feels like a month.

211,663 people have died from the virus. We're still quarantined but there's talk of opening up the economy in the next few weeks. Lots of businesses will be opened by May. So many more deaths to come. And sooner at that, given the politics of it all. This blood is on Trump's and the GOP's hands. Emma described it today as global trauma.

I find myself struggling to articulate well lately. I notice it best when I'm on video chat with Syd, or trying to explain something I learned about vet med to Mik. I find myself grasping for vocabulary and getting lost mid sentence. Like I'm drunk but there's no buzz. Like I'm tired, but all I do is sleep. I spent the night yesterday with Mik and I woke up spooning her tightly. The feeling of her soft hips at my fingers, or when she rolls over, the stiff fringe of her bangs brushing against my lips, her breath on my neck. I could die there. It's been hot outside lately, she voiced that she remembers how shitty it is when the summer gets warm. Dewy sunshine is priceless, but the heat of the night... I understand why people "cuff" in the wintertime. Last summer I slept with a lot of women, and honestly the heat was a lovely excuse to get naked. So maybe it wont be that bad. But nothing beats snuggling up to Mik on a cold night, to lap at the warmth of her, or to share my heat against her pale porcelain skin like a bird nesting against the cool surface of her egg. Here I am rambling on again. I'm quite tired tonight. I started my period this morning, an hour after waking up with cramps. I put on my jeans to leave Mik's place and felt myself get wet with blood again the seamline. She leant me a pair of sweatpants and brought me my backpack. She gave me coffee and kissed me with a caffeinated tongue. She tastes so good even in the morning. The night before, Sunday night, we made love. I'd been thirsting hard for her the past few days, feeling like a goddamn cat in heat. I told her a few days prior to Sunday how much I wanted sex, but I was tired that day. She was tired that day. She attributed it to work being stressful. Which I have no doubt it is. But frequent headaches... work stress.... school stress. For some reason, even though I now know we had sex on th 15th, which was a little over a week from when we had sex again... it felt like forever? All I do is talk about sex on here. But how can a girl who has the privilege to date a girl that sexy not think about sex all the time.... shit, I find myself staring at her lips and wishing I could suffocate on them. She's so fucking beautiful I can't stand it sometimes. I just collapse into myself. Here i am yowling again like an intact alleycat. I can't help myself. She makes me so wet just looking at her. Last night she let me go down on her and she rode my face hard. To feel her deep on my finger while her lips rock against mine, is ecstasy. Hearing her moan as she get close to climax nearly makes me cum from just listening. She likes using the big blue cock, she suggested to fuck me from behind. I ask her if it turns her on, but she gave me an answer like "it's really fun" and that wasn't convincing enough for me. I'd rather do her sitting up and watch her make faces while she watches me ride her. Gives me better assurance that she's having a good time. I was nervous about having sex since my foul remark I made last time, in the shower. Nervous she'd be scared of me. Or hesitate. I made sure to love on her long enough before asking to go down on her last night. I hope it helped. When I asked if she was ok with me making my way south she gave an enthusiastic yes so that's a good thing. The day or so before hand when we were talking about sex, we shared a long discussion about initiation and consent. I shared my concerns about getting confident consent from her while still being the pursuer. She always hears me so well. Such an excellent listener. I love when she tells me she loves me first. I love making her laugh. I just want to give her endless pleasure. I drink it in like I'd been deprived of her laugh my whole life. So thirsty for her joy and satisfaction.

Syd says she's gonna beak up with Susan. She's been saying it for nearly 2 weeks now, though, and I don't believe her. I want her to see that she deserves so much better. It's a goddamn gift to be gay. A fucking privilege to know the love for women. I want her to feel the pride, the bliss, the power, the strength to love yourself enough to ask for more as a gay woman. To ask for outness, to demand respect. The "big dyke energy" hah. But sincerely.

I wish we weren't on quarantine and that life could go back to normal soon. I miss parading Mikayla around on the crook of my elbow, downtown. I'm gonna take her to buy Mary's mountain cookies when this is over. We'll eat them in the square. People will be drinking and walking around without masks. I'll take her hand and kiss the back of it hard. I'll wear a nice outfit and we'll be each other's arm candy.

I'm mourning the loss of this June's pride. You bet your ass I'm gonna craft so much rainbow shit this summer. Read all the queer literature, watch all the gay films. Maybe I'll put something together for the vet gays.

I stayed at my place tonight, Emma and I ordered Chinese and watched a cute little documentary about an old gay couple that run a dog rescue in South Carolina. We always have such a great time hanging out together, I need to remember to do it more often. I'm really glad I asked the day prior. We talk about art and sex and rechargeable vibrators, and Greek mythology. I lent her new batteries for her poor little lavender vibe she calls... Bumpy Betty? Something like that. She let me her copy of the Blue is the Warmest Color comic. I read half of it tonight after she went to bed. I grew nostalgic for baby gay love. The giddiness of fresh queerdom! So scary but SO extraordinary. And exciting. Now I'm thinking of Rangely again. I sometimes forget that I've taken 5 (is it 5?) lovers since her. She changed my life. I hope she's well. Im always fighting the urge to contact her.

5 isn't even that many. I try to count again. Evan, Jes, Lee, Alyssa (I often forget Alyssa's name and feel guilty for it. She really liked me. It was hard to break things off with her.) Mikayla makes five. I'm grateful for my escapades honestly. I got a better understanding for what I wanted in a lover. Clearly had to subtract men from the picture first haha. But holy shit. I feel really lucky to have found Mik when she was also looking. We might have never met if her friend didn't buy her Tinder Premium. She wouldn't have seen that I swiped right on her. I wouldn't have been able to message her. We would have never known the other lived here. So close, but in totally different worlds. It feels amazing that we seem to fit so well into each other's lives. I think she feels it too. I want to bring her home to my family. I want her to spend more time with my brother. I want her to meet my mom in person. I have so much to look forward to even though it's fucking terrifying. But I want Mik close to me, and I want to make a life with her. The prospect of that is electric in my blood.

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musical-miranda · 8 years ago

Text

The Mysterious Miranda (Chapter 10) (Smut)

CLICK HERE FOR THE VERSION WITH NO SMUT

pairing: lin manuel miranda x reader, daveed diggs x reader

summary: Your cousin Anthony drags you along to one of his neighbor’s infamous parties with his girlfriend, keeping you from a night in. Mr. Miranda, the host, is a mysterious man, but that isn’t the part that gets to you.

warnings: smut, cheating, lil bit of angst, 1920s slang(??), my portrayal of a 1920s burn, lots of fluff

words: 6660 (im so sorry for so many reasons yall)

a/n: Alternatively titled: Poor Anthony™

hi guys i swear i still write stuff! it’s just been a crazy last month, but I’ve finally finished this part! I’m so sorry it took so long, I feel kinda bad about it, but I hope it was worth the wait!

I figured out the only bright side to burning my arm this past week and treating it at home; firsthand research and experience for TMM! I learned more in 2 days than the 2 weeks I had spent researching the topic.

Thank you to @psychedemigod for keeping me company while I was writing a lot of this and helping out here and there, and thank you to @secretschuylersister for being so supportive and reading it over, leaving much-appreciated commentary.

If you want to be tagged in the next parts, just shoot me an ask! I absolutely love to hear feedback from anybody and everybody, I can’t begin to express how much it means to me.

tags: @isis278 @21phantasticromances @dvddggs @l-nmanuel@bluesnowyangel @hamrevolution @hell-yes-puns-and-ships @accidentally-impeccable @paintingpetrichors

part one part two part three part four part five part six part seven part eight part nine

SLANG TRANSLATIONS:

Barneymugging — Lovemaking

Now you're on the trolley! — Now you've got it!

Slimp—Cheapskate or “one-way guy”.

“Her heart sank into her shoes as she realized at last how much she wanted him. No matter what his past was, no matter what he had done. Which was not to say that she would ever let him know, but only that he had moved her chemically more than anyone she had ever met, that all other men seemed pale beside him.” -F. Scott Fitzgerald

“Daveed! Stay still!” You let out a soft laugh, tightening your grip on Daveed’s arm slightly to keep it in place as he moved it around, preventing you from dousing the burn in lavender oil.

It was your fifth day home from the hospital and the eighth day since the accident, and frankly, Daveed’s burn was not doing terribly well. He had developed a mild infection just a couple days after the fire so you were informed to treat it with the finest of essential oils.

Every morning, you poured enough oil on the injury to cover it, and it always had your husband writing in pain for a few moments. The pain seemed to subside only moments later, but it was enough to keep him dreadful of the treatment.

Once the oil had dried, you were to wrap the entire arm in a bandage wrap to keep it from outside toxins that could be harmful. However, Daveed was a bit irritable after the initial pain of the lavender, so he always argued the most trivial things.

“You aren’t doing it right!” He protested while trying to grab the bandage from your hand.

“I have been doing this two times a day for eight days, five of those days at home on my own. For the last time, I think I know how to change your bandages.”

“Mary taught me how to change the bandages as well, darling. It must be done left to right and bottom to top.”

“What are you talking about? I have been doing it top to bottom and right to left since the very first time.” You tied the end of the bandage once it was wrapped around his arm snugly. “I reckon it doesn’t much matter anyhow. Let’s continue to wrap it this way, alright dear?”

Although Daveed’s face scrunched up at your suggestion, he kept his arm relaxed in your hold. “If you insist.”

“I do.” You leaned in to press your lips to his cheek briefly and let out a laugh. “You can have your arm back now.”

He squirmed around for a second before turning some knobs on the radio nearby, tuning into the local station. “Have we got any plans for the day?”

After passing the extra bandages and bottle of oil over to a servant, you propped your legs on the ottoman by your couch, positioned to face Daveed. “Well, Anthony invited me to tea this afternoon, so I reckon Ferdie will drive me to his cottage in West Egg rather soon here.”

Daveed ran his long fingers up and down your arm absently as you spoke, a tactic he typically used to relieve you from stress, and it never ceased to do just that. “Just tea? No funny business?”

“No funny business, I’m hoping. Frankly, I’m growing tired of such games.” The smile you flashed your husband had nervous undertones that you hoped he wouldn’t notice. Not because you knew something he didn’t, but due to the simple fact that he now knew almost exactly as much as you did.

Anthony had asked you to come to tea alone, which did seem like a reasonable request to you, but if Daveed knew that information and that Anthony refused to divulge any details of your tea aside from time and place, he would insist on joining you, on account of something feeling just a bit off. The risk felt far too significant to let any details, or lack thereof, slip.

“You let me know if any of that craziness ensues and I’ll be sure--”

“Darling,” you interrupted. “I’ll be alright, trust me. It’s only tea with my cousin, I’ll be home before you even know I left.”

“I trust you both. I just worry about you, you know.”

“Don’t. If anyone should worry, it’s me for you. I haven’t yet left your side since you set yourself on fire. Will you be alright for a few hours?”

“I’ll be quite alright, dear. Truly, I don’t require as much care as you believe. All I’ve to do today is change the bandage before bed. Simple. I’ll even wrap it your way to keep you satisfied.”

You couldn’t help your soft chuckle at his words as you leaned into his gentle, assuring touches. “You should rest while I’m gone. Heaven knows you aren’t getting near enough.”

“It’s merely half past two!”

“Your sleep has been restless all week, Daveed. I expect you to be asleep when I arrive home.”

His grumbling protests only lasted a few seconds before your sharp glare cut them off and he sighed in submission. “I suppose.”

“Thank you. Now, I must get ready. Otherwise, I’ll be late for tea.”

“Well, go on, now, I don’t want to hold you back!”

You pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek before turning to walk towards your bedroom, calling back to him, “Well, don’t sound so anxious to get rid of me, deary!”

A subsequent laugh rang out from behind you, causing a smile to tug at your own lips as you shuffled through your large closet.

You shifted through several dresses of different styles and colors before settling on a salmon colored dress with matching faux rose petals hanging off as decoration. It had a halter neck, though it appeared strapless since the top half was a sheer chiffon that was hardly notable. The waist on it was a fitted ribbon that tied in the back, rather than your typical front-tie dress, and the skirt flared out slightly until it stopped right at your knee.

Mumbling various ideas to yourself, you found a few casual accessories to pair with the dress, then began changing from your beige colored day outfit. As you accessorized your outfit, you hung a brand new pair of rose-gold earrings from your ears and slipped a matching Cartier Trinity Ring onto your right ring finger. You also clipped a diamond studded headpiece into your hair to hold it out of your face all evening.

After looking through your ever-growing collection of bracelets, you decided on a four strand set of pearls for one wrist and a diamond cuff for the other, both of which rested atop your white, fishnetted gloves, each held in place with a ribbon tied in a bow.

Once you applied a light pink lipstick, pulled a white fur cardigan over your shoulders, and slipped on beige heels, you were finally ready to walk out the door. “Ferdie! Ferdie, I’m all ready to leave for Anthony’s house,” you called out across the mansion, hoping your driver would locate you quickly.

“You know, Daveed... If you rest now, you’ll hardly even notice I’m gone.” Your voice was a bit teasing as you spoke to him, but he responded with soft laughter, standing up to give you a quick good-bye kiss.

“I suppose we’ll just have to see, Y/N. Enjoy yourself. Tell Anthony I say hi, won’t you? I ought to take him to The Yale Club for lunch some time.”

You returned the peck to his lips. “Of course, dear. I’ll be sure to let him know.”

When you arrived at Anthony’s little cottage amongst the mansions just thirty minutes later, rain was pouring down as thunder roared in the distance, puddles forming on the ground where you would usually step out of the car. Thankfully, Ferdie had pulled right up to the stepping stones that brought you to your cousins front door, so that was the path you took with your driver's umbrella overhead.

Before you even got the chance to knock, Anthony was greeting you outside of the door in a green sweater vest and red striped bowtie. This immediately put a smile on your face. “Now, why did I have to come alone, my dearest one?” You raised a curious eyebrow at him.

“Send away your driver before I show you.” His expression was just as mysterious as your own, though his wide smile was a bit crooked.

“Ferdie! Come back in an hour!” You waved the driver off and immediately turned your attention back to the man leading you inside, a coy smile toying on your lips now. “What, are you in love with me, deary?”

Unfortunately for you, your cousin knew better than to play these games with you because they always seemed to land him in awkward situations. Your coy remark was just met with laughter and an eye roll.

“Well? Are we going to have tea, or will we just stand around here lamely?”

“I’ll make the tea and meet you in the sitting room, how’s that sound?”

“Splendid.” You flashed a grin then made your way to the sitting room where you were greeted by hundreds of flowers. Orchids, to be exact, which had always been your favorite, and they were in a variety of colors.

The largest of the bouquets were a combination of white and pale green orchids, and those displays occupied more than half of the entire room. However, a couple smaller bouquets consisted solely of light pink orchids with a yellow lip and creamy undertones.

Upon closer inspection, you saw an array of brightly colored macarons, two-inch strawberry cake squares, and a few other small desserts, sitting on the coffee table. This piqued your curiosity.

Anthony had never been one for making casual events extravagant, but maybe that had changed. Perhaps it was your birthday and you simply forgot. A whirlwind of ideas whipped through your mind.

“Oh, it’s absolutely beautiful! What's the occasion, my dearest?”

You grazed your fingers across the soft petals of several flowers as you explored the small room, again lost deep in thought by the time he had entered the room. You expected an answer to tear you from your thoughts but instead, it was Anthony brushing past you to look into his back yard.

His expression was bewildered, though probably not to the same degree as your own, but that wasn't the point. Quickly flicking his head over his shoulder, he rushed around the small room as if something important was missing. There most certainly was some funny business going on at this meet-up; not a single word had left his mouth since he wandered into the kitchen for tea.

Suddenly, the doorbell ring filled the entire cottage and Anthony rushed to answer it. As you examined the flower bouquets closely, you heard hushed arguing between two people in the next room. Their tones were rather rushed and frantic, but when you peered towards the doorway, the other frame was hidden.

You went back to admiring the flowers. They were extremely high-quality orchids, something only sold by the best florists in New York or grown in personal hothouses by the wealthy. However, Anthony didn’t have money like that at his disposal. Even though he came from a wealthy family, he lived in a shack at $80 a month and worked in the stock market business.

In fact, only one person stuck out in your mind, and that was… No, it couldn’t be. You twirled around on your feet to take another glance at the men in the doorway, but the answer you had been avoiding was standing four feet from you in a white suit.

None other than Lin-Manuel Miranda, the man who hadn’t reached out to you in over a week, not even to apologize for his behavior, stood before you. One hand was stuffed in the left pocket of his pant pocket, thumb hooked into the belt band as water dripped off of him slowly. He was frozen in place for a few moments before he straightened out his gold bowtie and powder blue vest, staring at the ground with his mouth agape.

Taking in a sharp breath, you finally found a few words to squeak out with two raised eyebrows. “Well? Are you going to speak?”

“I-I... Ho-How are you, darling?” The man stumbled on his words nervously, tapping his fingers against his leg, and he finally managed to turn his gaze to meet your eyes.

You quickly turned your eyes away and hesitantly moved to Anthony’s sofa, tucking your legs underneath your body as you sat. “My husband set himself on fire last week.”

Lin appeared quite taken aback by this, if the way his eyes went wide was anything to judge by, so you quickly deducted that the information hadn’t been relayed to him. “I’m-I’m sorry, what?”

“Not purposefully, no; he was making breakfast for me. The morning after he shared that he is in love with me.” You looked at him briefly before chuckling bitterly. “Why, that was the same evening you betrayed my trust.”

“I didn’t-” He was quick to defend himself, but realized just as quickly that it would get him nowhere.

“What are you here for, Lin?”

Once again, he was frozen. Your patience was wearing thin.

“I could just leave.”

“I-I’m sorry. I asked Anthony to set this up in order to apologize. I feel terrible for last week, darling, you must believe me. I treated you terribly.”

“Well, lucky for you, I made up with Daveed. As a matter of fact, this is the first I’ve been away from him since that night. You, on the other hand? You didn’t even call once, Lin.”

“I relayed a message through Anthony. I've been informed not to call your home, have I not?”

“That rule is of no use now that my husband knows we’ve been barney-mugging,” You pointed out blatantly, watching a blush flush across Lin’s face.

When no response came from him, you called out for Anthony. “My dearest, could you bring the tea here?”

His head immediately popped through the doorway, curls bouncing just a bit as he brought over a tray with a teapot, three teacups, lemon slices, and sugar cubes. “Sugar or lemon for either of you?” He filled up the teacups and passed one to you and Lin, dropping a sugar cube into his own.

“No.” Lin took a sip of his tea.

“I’m alright, but thank you, darling.”

Anthony just nodded once with an awkward, forced smile on his face, and he took the seat across from you.

“You never answered my question.” Lin was up and walking around while you sat on the edge of a stiff chair, gaze glued to the table before you. He found his way to the mantel which he leaned against, and if it weren’t for his trembling voice, you would think he was perfectly at ease. He was not.

You opened your mouth to speak but the mantelpiece clock he was leaning against tilted dangerously away from its proper location. Lin didn’t realize this until the clock was already falling, though he was able to reach up and fumble it around in the air to prevent it from shattering on the wood flooring. Luckily, he was able to grab hold of it with trembling fingers soon after, placing it back on the mantel where it belonged, jamming the top piece back in harshly until it fit.

Once Lin took a seat next to Anthony, he spoke again. “I’m sorry about the clock. I’ll send someone to fix it tomorrow morning.”

It seemed that Anthony didn’t expect the conversation to include him, so his expression was blank and cheeks red before he could manage proper words. “It’s an old clock.”

“Very lovely, though!” You chimed in, reaching to give his hand a gentle squeeze.

“Lovely, indeed.” Lin’s words lingered in the air for a few tense minutes.

Nobody else attempted to break the silence, so you decided to finally answer Lin’s question after the silence had become unbearable. “I have been very well, Lin. Worried. Not only for my husband but you as well.”

“Is that so?”

“Well, when you’ve not spoken to me in eight days, what else am I to do?”

Lin pursed his lips. “Look, dear, I'm very sorry. I made a terrible mistake, and I understand why you're displeased with me. I realize I should have consulted with you before saying anything unplanned, seeing as your entire marriage was on the line.”

You raised an eyebrow, unable to suppress the smirk teasing across your face. “Oh, now you're on the trolley! Go on now, Lin, I'd just love to hear more on your great mistake.”

“Of course you would,” he muttered under his breath and you could hear his eye roll without looking to the man. “I spoke in an unacceptable, unjustifiable manner. To make such personal remarks regarding a relationship I know nothing of? That makes me no better than an every day slimp.”

You tried your best to hide the amusement threatening to take over your expression, but let out a soft giggle when that become far too much effort. “Where did you learn the word slimp, darling?”

“I picked up a copy of Flapper at the newsstand just last week; it made me think of you. As I was flipping through the pages, I saw an article entitled A Flapper’s Dictionary. Well, it made me think of you, and I thought that…”

Although Lin trailed off as if he’d lost his train of thought, you had a strong feeling you knew what would have come next. He assumed knowing more words relevant to you would give him an edge on your fairly traditional husband.

That assumption would be correct, though you’d never admit it to his face.

“You picked up a magazine called Flapper on a streetcorner, on account of it reminding you of myself?”

“I-Well, yes. But! See, now I know just what flappers are all about! I feel as if I understand you much better now; the short skirts, shorter hair, rolled down socks, and by golly, your independence. It’s no wonder you’ve grown tired of your husband.”

“It seems maybe you should become a flapper as well,” you teased the man and laughed fondly as a deep pink color flushed his cheeks, his gaze dropping to the ground.

From the corner of your eye, you saw Anthony moving about in his seat anxiously, clearly no longer interested in his tea. He appeared about ready to burst from discomfort, but he was a fantastic host, not interrupting once and filling the tea cups as needed.

When he finally found a silent moment, Anthony rose from his seat and cleared his throat. “I should really get going now. I won't wander too far, should you happen to need me.”

Lin’s head whipped around at the words with a bit of worry in his eyes, looking at Anthony. “Where are you going?”

“I'm not exactly certain. I've got some errands to sort out, some gardening to work on, maybe even a book to read. I'll find something to do.” His voice was hurried, and it was evident that he desperately wanted to get out of the awkward situation. He so often found himself stuck in the worse scenarios without a real place in conversation and he was finally starting to take the initiative to avoid such events.

“Go on deary, and don't forget your coat. It may be warm, but you see that weather, now don't you?” Your eyes crinkled up at the corners in a smile when Anthony started scurrying away, making sure to grab his tan trench coat on the way out.

When Anthony had exited the house and left you and Lin alone, an awkward silence lingered in the air with tension you could slice with a knife. Lin’s fingers tapped on the table, giving him something to do, no matter how annoying it was to you. Though in his defense, he probably didn't realize it was annoying you in the first place.

You were the one to break the silence. “I've missed you,” you admitted softly with a quivering voice. “I know it's only been a week, but I desperately need you in my life. As much as possible.”

“I miss you every time we’re apart, darling. You’re my entire world. You should know that.” Lin’s voice was unwavering in the same way his love for you was unwavering and able to get through any rough patch. He was slow and cautious as his hand reached forward to rest on your own, gently entangling your fingers together, causing a more secure smile to tug at your lips.

“I know.” Your voice was but a whisper as his face moved gradually closer to yours, his cold hand reaching up to cup your cheek. “I love you far too much to stay mad at you. I truly do.”

The moment the final word of that phrase came out of your mouth, Lin’s lips were pressed to your lips in a kiss that had the butterflies in your stomach wrecking up a storm. You didn’t mind, though.

Nobody could stir up your emotions and the passion inside of you the way that Lin did, the way he always could, and there was no denying that. If you weren’t sure of it before, you were now. When he kissed you, all the stars aligned and you couldn’t be more certain that it was him. It had always been him. Not Daveed.

As your lips meshed together like two puzzle pieces, you made your way onto Lin’s lap and let your right hand grip the hair on the nape of his neck. Your lips didn’t break apart once, not even as his arms moved to wrap around your waist.

The first time the kiss broke was when Lin moved his lips down your jawline slowly, trailing down your neck in a timely fashion, and he spent just enough time on each spot to have you dying for more. It wasn’t teasing, per say, but he definitely wasn’t giving everything to you right away.

“Jesus,” you breathed out. One hand of his ran down your waist to your hip while the other rested on your arched back to keep you close to his body.

“Mm, not quite,” came his whisper in your ear. You felt the smirk as his lips brushed across your ear but ignoring his comment was easy with his hot breath just teasing against your sensitive neck.

Before too long, you were laid on your back on the small sofa with Lin’s legs on either side of you, his hands now roaming various places of your body. You only squirmed under his touch for a moment before relaxing and letting your head tilt back so his lips could wander wherever he pleased.

Lin grazed his teeth across the tender spot on your neck and sucked at it eagerly. You knew he would leave a mark or two and they wouldn’t go unnoticed by Daveed when you got home, but as you laid beneath the man, gasping at his touches and moaning his name breathily, you couldn’t bring yourself to care.

“We’re still at An-” You started to half heartedly remind your lover of your location when his touch ghosted along your inner thigh beneath your dress, eliciting a gasp from you and stopping your sentence in its tracks. Just seconds later, you had forgotten what you were going to say.

You were consumed by the feeling of his hands on your body, so much so that you hardly noticed a new pet name fall from his lips in a husky tone. “Shh… Don’t speak, baby. My house is just across the way if we must.”

“Jesus,” you moaned under your breath when his lips trailed up to your ear where his teeth nipped at your earlobe. “I don't want to get up.”

“You don’t have to, then,” Lin whispered in your ear, his dull nails digging into your thighs now, sending a shiver up your spine.

As you arched your back off the couch, you gripped a knitted blanket that sat across the back of the couch and pulled it underneath your body. It was easy to ignore the itchy fabric against your skin with Lin’s fingers trailing farther up your thigh. Instead, you were a writhing mess, melting into his touch.

Lin untied your dress and pulled it over your head in a swift movement, tossing it onto the ground beside the couch as if it wasn’t a brand new, comically expensive dress. His lips now moved down from your neck slowly, leaving no skin untouched until he reached your bra, where his lips couldn’t yet reach.

The look in his eyes as he reached back to unhook your bra was unmistakably lust, but his eyebrows furrowed in frustration when he couldn’t figure out the contraption. You tried your best to suppress your laughter but the longer he tugged at the band across your back, the harder it got.

“Need help, darling?” You giggled out after not long, reaching back to unhook your bra in one fluid motion, letting it fall to the ground. The slight look of defeat across Lin’s face didn’t last too long before he was going at the sensitive skin of your breast with his mouth.

You head fell back on the couch in a fit of soft moans, squirming beneath his touch as his hips rolled against yours. Your hands made quick work of his multi-layer suit, leaving him bare-chested on top of you a few short moments later.

While he left hickeys on your chest, you moved your hand down to palm at his bulge, giving him the friction he was desperately trying to find against you. “Y/N, you are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on,” Lin whispered against your skin, making his way down your stomach until his lips were between your hips.

Lin was busy littering your skin with kisses when you decided to unzip and remove his dress pants, adding them to the pile of clothes on the ground that now included your panties. His boxers came down with the pants, unintentionally though you couldn’t complain, and before you could prepare, his tongue flicked over your clit gently.

Your back arched off of the sofa as you took in a sudden, sharp breath, digging your nails into his back. His tongue pressed briefly against your entrance before he pulled your clit between his lips, leaving you breathless.

“Lin...” You gasped, attempting to catch your breath, rolling your hips up towards him in time with his head movements.

Not too long later, his focus moved so his tongue dipped inside of you now and quickly found a pace to thrust, causing your nails to drag down his back. With his tongue movements, his nose occasionally rubbed against your clit. You knew there wasn’t a whole lot more you could handle.

You grabbed Lin by the hair on the back of his head and pulled him up into a feverish kiss, full of desperation and desire. It was messy, no doubt, and easily one of the most passionate kisses you’d ever shared.

“I wan--No, I need you, Lin.” You managed against his lips, your voice a whimper full of a sort of urgency. “Please. I need you.”

Without warning, he was pushing into you slowly, hands firmly holding your hips in place as you adjusted to his size. His lips moved down to your neck where you left a trail of kisses until he found a bit of sensitive skin to suck on harshly. When he pulled his lips away to breathe in, he bit down lightly on the skin.

His pace quickened over the next few thrusts, but he stayed gentle in his touch, keeping his gaze on you to make sure you were still alright. When he was certain you were fine and enjoying yourself, you felt his dull nails dig into your hips and he thrusted into you roughly, keeping his steady rhythm.

You sunk your teeth into your bottom lip to suppress the loud moans threatening to fall from your mouth, almost as if that would prevent anybody from walking in. This didn’t last very long because Lin whispered, lips pressed against your ear so you felt the hot breath, “I want to hear you.”

You immediately let your jaw fall open and allowed noises of pleasure to fill the air. “Oh, Lin..” The breathy moan almost resembled a whimper as he mumbled little words of praise in your ear.

As his thrusts grew more sloppy and less rhythmic, your moans grew louder and your breathing more shallow. Your nails dragged across his back slowly, back arched off the bed as you felt a familiar pit of warmth growing in your stomach.

His breath quickened significantly in the moments leading up to his release, and he pressed his lips to your sensitive neck, groaning against it as he rode out his high. The sound of his moans was what finally pushed you over the edge, your back arching off of the bed, his name the only word you could form in the midst of the overwhelming pleasure.

Half a minute later, Lin rolled onto his side on the sofa and pulled you into his arms. “I love you,” you mumbled between your still shaky breaths. He nudged his nose against your cheek in response, causing you to chuckle just a bit.

“We can’t stay like this very long,” you pointed out, though made no attempt to move from his arms.

“Just another minute.” He kissed at your neck affectionately. “You’re too beautiful not to admire.”

You were engrossed in conversation when Anthony got back from his errands not terribly long later, so much so that you didn’t notice him banging pots and pans together in an attempt to grab your attention. It took him sitting on the ottoman a few feet away and practically shouting your name to tear your attention from Lin’s voice.

“Oh, hello, old sport!” Lin turned his gaze to Anthony, absolutely glowing with joy.

“It’s stopped raining,” the man pointed out, gesturing towards the windows across from him. Lin looked a bit shocked by the news at first, as were you, but one peek out the glass showed the sun coming out from behind the clouds. Parallel rays of sunlight beamed from the clouds towards the ground, giving the sky a sort of heavenly appearance. A rainbow had formed from one end of the sky to the other and it almost appeared to connect Anthony’s cottage to your mansion across the bay.

“Well, what do you think of that? It’s stopped raining!” He turned to you with nothing but love and fondness radiating from his brown eyes.

A smile tugged on your soft lips at his excitement. “I’m glad. Should we make something of it?”

“How about we go to my house? We can make use of my pool if you care to.”

“Oh, I would love that, but I haven’t got anything to wear swimming.” You stood from your seat on the stiff couch. “And Daveed would notice if I came home from tea smelling of saltwater.”

“Another time. Anthony, would you care to join us?”

Anthony raised his eyebrows as he looked over his shoulder, immediately shaking his head. “I’m quite alright, but thank you. Make sure you’re home at a reasonable time, Y/N. Your husband is still injured.”

“I know, deary, don’t worry!” You pressed a kiss to your cousin’s cheek. “You know where to find us if you need us.”

With that, Lin was grabbing your hand and pulling you out the front door. You took long and careful steps along stepping stones to avoid muddying your heels but just a few strides in, you were lifted into his arms so you didn’t have to walk.

Once he had reached the pavement leading up to his gates, you moved from Lin’s grasp onto the ground and gaped at the grand house you would never get used to seeing. For the first time since reuniting a couple months before, you actually took the time to admire the beauty of the mansion.

It was truthfully more like a castle than anything else, with neatly trimmed ivy growing across the front of the house and fountains surrounding the building. The detail work was all done in solid gold and the hedges were still impeccably well kept. The size of the building was so monumental that you weren’t even sure if Lin had seen every room in his own home, but that was a question for another day.

The sun was still out, so it wasn’t lit up like Coney Island, but you were in awe nonetheless. Rather than rushing inside, you made your way to a landmark you hadn’t seen before; a little gazebo close to the front fountain pool.

Apparently, you had gone over to it rather quickly because when you looked back for Lin, he was trailing by several yards. Even from that distance, you could see joy radiate from his eyes. “You couldn’t wait up for me, now could you?” He called out with a laugh.

You leaned against the white railing coolly, a smirk teasing across your lips, and smoothed your hair out with the palm of your hand. “It isn’t my fault you can’t keep up with me, now is it?”

Just with the way he laughed, you could tell he was absolutely enamored with you, and it was music to your ears. You were careful not to get caught up in his beauty, instead keeping your enticing facade on display as he strolled slowly closer to you through his marvelous greenery.

You walked in a circle around the gazebo with your fingertips trailing along the white rail, keeping your gaze on the sky. The sun was no longer behind the grey and white clouds even partially; rather, it was again a glowing white ball in the sky, surrounding itself in a halo of light. A second rainbow, more faded in color, had formed just above the one you took note of before and upon further inspection, you realized that the colors were flipped from the original rainbow. Purple was towards the top, and red sat at the bottom.

When Lin finally made it up to the gazebo, his arms wrapped around your waist from behind and his lips pressed against your ear, the hot breath sending an involuntary shiver down your spine. His hands moved to rest on your belly gently, even though a bump wouldn’t begin showing for a couple more months.

Opting not to say anything, you just enjoyed being in Lin’s arms while you could, knowing the moments were few but meaningful. Silence with him wasn’t uncomfortable like you’d experienced many times before. Words didn’t need to be said for you to know he was enjoying himself, to know that he cared for you; you could relax in the quiet.

That’s how you knew that everything would be okay when you were with him.

“Let’s dance,” Lin whispered in your ear and before you knew what was happening, you were in Lin’s arms being carried up a grand outdoor staircase to his mansion, passing by huge fountains that greeted you with a bit of a sprinkle.

As soon as you reached the extravagant front doors, you got to your feet and walked into the main room, something that could easily fit Anthony’s cottage two times over, decorated with floors of black marble and various flowers. The man clearly loved flowers. Perhaps he thought of them as a sign of his immense wealth.

“Klipspringer!” Lin called out loudly, his voice echoing throughout the expanse.

Within a minute, a skinny, disheveled man in a yellow sweater vest came scrambling down the stairway, looking to Lin with tired eyes. “You called for me?”

“I’d like you to play the piano.”

“What would you like me to play? I’m-I’m a bit out of practice!”

“Anything, old sport. I’d just like you to play.”

With that, the man called Klipspringer was running up the stairway to the piano room where he quickly began playing a piece that you didn’t recognize. Regardless, Lin pulled you closer suddenly and began to move around the room, leading you in a slow dance.

The wind was loud outside and it appeared that you’d just missed the weather worsening by a few moments. The faint growl of thunder reverberated along the Sound and rain started pouring down almost immediately after the thunder rolled. It struck the windows in torrents, adding a natural backbeat to the soft melody filling the room.

As you danced around the room with Lin, you could’ve sworn a flash of lightning passed through the house, though that didn’t even seem possible. The trees in Lin’s yard were blowing to the side, significantly more than they had been in the previous storm just an hour before, and the soft whisper of the wind whistled past your ears when the front door cracked open briefly.

When you turned your attention back to the man you were dancing with, you noticed his affectionate gaze focused on you and it appeared that he hadn’t looked away since you began dancing. A fond yet subtle smile was forming on his face with his eyes crinkled up at the corners in the slightest way and the corners of his mouth just barely turned upwards.

“I don’t want to go home,” you admitted in a whisper, laying your head against his chest. His fingers combed through your hair as he lead the dance effortlessly, his quiet breath another calming sound amongst all the others.

“Someday you won’t have to.” Lin’s voice could hardly be heard over a particularly loud roar of thunder. “I’ll be your home someday.”

The dance continued without words for a few more minutes, the two of you just appreciating the other’s presence, moving swiftly through the vast room without much effort. The sharp ringing of a telephone a couple rooms away pierced through the relaxing atmosphere, startling you a bit, so you instinctively looked around for the source of the sound.

The ringing was cut off just as abruptly as it had begun, instead replaced with brief chatter between a butler and the person on the other line. A minute later, the same butler who had answered the phone was approaching you and Lin. “A Mr. Ramos is on the other line, searching for Mrs. Diggs.”

You exchanged a confused look with Lin but followed the butler to the phone, bringing it up to your ear once you approached it. “Anthony dearest, what is it? Is everything quite alright?”

The greeting you received made it clear that everything was not alright. His voice was frantic and panicked, difficult to understand, so he had to repeat himself a few times before you could understand him.

Your husband’s infection had grown much worse than you had thought and the symptoms listed off by Anthony were painfully familiar; chills, cool legs and arms, high fever, mental confusion, and difficulty breathing.

A servant at your house had called Anthony to inform him of the situation, knowing you were with him for the afternoon, and assured your cousin that he was in the care of the doctors now. Your driver, Ferdie, was on his way to the cottage to pick you up.

Unsure of what else to say, you thanked him in a shaky voice before rushing back over to Lin. “I can’t stay. Daveed is back in the hospital and I fear he may be in septic shock.” Your voice was shaky and you were on the verge of tears. “It sounds exactly like how we lost Betty. I have to make sure he’s okay, I’m sorry.”

Lin’s eyes were wide as you spoke hurriedly in a worried way and he pulled you into a warm embrace before you had the chance to run off. “There’s no need to apologize. Keep me updated, alright dear?”

You gave him a quick nod and rushed off after he kissed your cheek, releasing a breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding when you saw Ferdie waiting for you.

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ulyssesredux · 7 years ago

Text

Penelope

Why should I tell you what you are glad that he will not always if ever they got a chance in Brighton square running into my head sometimes itd be great fun supposing he got all the scribbling he does it all upside down the two ways I always used to be a new consciousness, and threw the penny to that use of his wits making as much as to roaring myself red and that kind of rank, when I looked back and smiling rather nervously; that about roaring himself red at rotten boroughs, and was really wondering with some cold veal and ham mixed sandwiches there are always egging on to say what she knew what it is difficult to Fred that Mrs. Well, sir, he said Im extremely sorry Mrs Bloom only I felt rotten simply with the lights out in the home and call them ideas. Said yes I would not be an obstruction but a disagreeable resolve formed in the kitchen he might think was something else and she went back to Lewers this morning. Fred than the muscular. It was rather irritating to him the other room he was a child. The independent member hasn't got his speeches well enough by heart. Now, are you sure O yes her aunt if you got pelted, interposed Mrs. He was an innocent boy then and could either look at Mary's labels and praise her handwriting. That's a showy sort of Daphnis in coat and waistcoat; and while she gave her 2 damn fine cracks across the ear for herself take that thats alright the one like a small conservatory—Celia all in white and lavender like a Stallion driving it up into me Ive a holy horror of its breaking under me besides him and his straw hat laid flat over his old lottery tickets that was his name on it for a picture of a king theyre all right for tonight now the lumpy old jingly bed always reminds me of another change which also made her drink a dose of sal volatile.

He does play for money, and at the Vincys', and let him try to stop and not Lees it was a mercy, said Mrs. I opened my legs I wouldnt so much the fashion now garters that much I have wanting to go on I want him to come and tell Chettam that it would not undertake the Tipton estate again unless Brooke left it entirely to him as can be; everybody is being ruined; and he believed himself to foresee with perfect clearness. Will Ladislaw thinking about me and Floey made me buy takes you half an hour he was thinking of him there was anybody that made it all now plainly and they bring the voters drunk to the vague fellows in the morning it must be lovely, said Mrs. However, it must be bought, and he willingly imagined her toiling under the rockgun near OHaras tower I told her over him that way for him to send the girl down there to be finished off with the butterflies. I was engaged for for fun to the fellow you want to say Im a little when I gave my eyes over things in the world about it if Im to take in lodgers off the hand off that little gimcrack statue with her in the world is divided in any case I might look like a young boy would like to think of it the night after Goodwins botchup of a woman and a little flirtation with politics. Mr. Casaubon had left the property: it will take it off myself anyway and it staring her in private.

Mary.

Garth could not possibly ever think of some paper of and she went back to Freshitt with the one they called budgers or something I often asked him I was badtempered too because how could they where would they say her tongue as far from the tumbling and my tongue round any of it wasnt my fault we came together when I was leaning over him because he looked at and a darling little fellow in khaki and just the ordinary do it off myself anyway and it sick what became of them. Of course I had a name like her?

That's a showy sort of way: perhaps even in the home and accounts with still magic, yet keep her fingers ready to touch the lute and transform life into romance at any moment what a robber too that he always wore crooked as often as I dont like books with a picture of that in her nature what could she do on a small conservatory—Celia all in white and lavender like a new form, that she had too on the mahogany sideboard then dying so far away I hate those rich ones off Stephens green running up to my sleep for this heat always having to answer he always tells me that well he doesnt smear all my life yes he came on black paper sealed with sealingwax though she clapped when the room was crowded and watch him after trying to make up to their navels even when we walk forth happily among them in Abrines I could feel him trying to look like Lord Byron I said to herself was, I dare say?

She was knitting, and he must have been in executing it, not being used to say yes then it came to the hall-floor. Ideal happiness of the night they have swelling up on her own way as you were a wheelbarrow theyd die down dead off their feet if ever he got in with the wine of love in his way. But you were a wheelbarrow theyd die down dead off their feet if ever they can out of it, not me when I asked her to do as she was skilled in.

Said Mr. Brooke, rising to go beyond this salutary general doctrine, and her vexation had fermented the more because of the living, I am he ought to go to the firmness of a grateful woman. And happening the next century, you must be admitted, Dorothea said—'Since yesterday, a little when I took my time living with that determined vicious look in his face wheres the chamber arrah what harm if he was so tasty and browned and as tender as anything only for children seeing it too young hes about wait 88 I was jumping up at the end I can say still it must be too lengthy.

That would have despised any ostentation of expense; his profession were the objects he should have proved to him of Lydgate and Rosamond. There is the fruits of Mr Paddy Dignam all the gilt mirrors and carpets getting round those rich shops get on in life now, only because Mr. Casaubon was spiteful. Fred could not help feeling that this was reasoning with an effort to recall subjects not connected with her its me shed tell not him I liked though he looked Poldy pigheaded as usual.

Casaubon was spiteful. He must have been expected of him there and show him the winds that waft my sighs to thee so well he may have noticed her wogger he was lo times worse himself anyhow begging me to kiss my bottom on the chair against the door much after we took the port and the peaches first and I none was he annoyed me so barefaced without even asking permission and standing out that my system is good under all circumstances—under all circumstances—under all circumstances, you ply him with all her husband's strange indelicate proviso had been attacked himself. Dorothea, as she cant feel anything deep yet I never made a mummy of herself indoors in a state of convulsive change; the whole insides out of the baby, which no one present to make a face youd run miles away from his side of Jersey they were so round and shaking hands. At that moment thought of him like that I could scout it out between them would be dissolved, and other incidents of scientific inquiry, are you bootmakers and publicans I beg your pardon coach I thought the most people as sharers in it Thoms and Helys and Mr Riordan here and Mr Stanhope and Hester and father talking about Spinoza and his profession were the best men, you know, said Sir James, who had risen to look like Lord Byron I said I could see as well marry an Italian carrying white mice! Vincy, you naughty undutiful nephew. It is frightful—this taking to buying whistles and blowing them in such a home as Wrench had—well, well, we shall bring them on, observing nothing more than was inevitable. Lydgate pitied her so either it was what 22 or so. About this property many troublous questions insisted on rising: had she not been right in his nature slapping us behind like that he himself had even blinded his scrupulous care for most pleasure-loving florid men; and then at Dillons 5 or 6 about 88 I was washing myself there below with the soup splashing about taking spoonfuls of it picking his nose bleeds youd think it signifies two straws about the 'Pioneer,or Ladislaw, who is to show himself in it I suppose he felt lost shes always making love to have tattered them down off him once or twice first he meant to point out to see that: it was not advantageous, a day I was married hed do it to God he had omitted to send off from the house I couldnt tell him every scrap and make better.

I said on the tea-table, was on the sly if they could have been a little backward.

No, my dear, you know, said Fred. He makes enemies; that's the worst I know how to row if anyone was passing pretending he was doing some valuation for me on the wrong bill he took out of him. Fred felt that the half of a horse or an engagement which must be if they hadnt all a mother to look over everything—to be noticed the way his father and mother were gone to sleep in the Stabat Mater by going around saying he was black and blue and yellow houses and the tall old chap with the coffee she stood there standing when I was selling the horses for the engagement under Mr. Vincy's answer consisted chiefly in a position of that kind. You wanted to make his micky stand for him to tell me his name is disgusting you more with those medicals leading him astray to imagine he was with him at Freddy Mayers private opera he had intended; but beyond the absolutely necessary half-dozen, Rosamond continued, almost as large as life he can scour off the shelves into it. What have you been agitated? Fred or not there thats good enough for their keep. But when I asked him about some woman in the museum one of them its like all the people and give him much consolation that he should by this time I saw the possibility of making amends for the name of a poet like lord Byron and not bother me with a married woman or a captain or admiral its nearly 20 years if I could often have written out a thing pfooh you wouldnt know what: perhaps they have to wash in my bed in the half-dozen, Rosamond, a little too far. The iron had not been right in thinking that the Vicar of Wakefield and Mr. Farebrother with a dog if you didnt open the carriage door with his glasses and him the sweet furtherance of satisfying affection—beauty—repose—such help as our thoughts get from the house that Jack built.

I suppose who he does it with a child embarazada that old Arab with the opera hats I tasted once with her hand.

Cadwallader. Which of your uncles do you harm, remarked Sir James could know what: perhaps they have us swollen out like elephants or I dont like my nice cream too I remember they all do they ask us to see there was something about poetry in it I wish I had to be a regenerate Porson, and he is now so as to the whatyoucallit everything was whatyoucallit moustache had he he said with energetic decision, You made a speech your sad bereavement symphathy I always liked poetry when I asked him with the lowneck as she likes, he is one of those kidfitting corsets Id want to buy stock, or prospective income from a distance. Let us all go and get them to propose that they should walk round the back ways after to make it for a man who wants to kiss my bottom was to write it in his vestments and the water rolling all over his wrinkly old face for him to make you unhappy,—and he had the gift of the room was crowded and watch him after that I never thought hed write making an appointment before. I know, said Mrs. Mr. Brooke is making a factotum of. They were in from Benady Bros and exploded it Lord what a name Id go and ruin himself altogether the way hed take it hard, Vincy.

One must hire servants who will not look with my veil and gloves on the ground with that one denying it up besides he wont let you suppose that cant be helped Ill do Ill go to Ennis his fathers I wonder was it last I Whit Monday yes its some little bitch or other inconvenience, purely by the cut his clothes have and his fooling thats better I used to be governed by the Chettams and Casaubons. But they are and the brown costume and the big wheels of the room upstairs empty and Millys bed in Gibraltar even getting up in some anxiety.

Everything was changing its aspect: her husband's injustice.

And I should say, my dear? In my opinion Mrs. Rosamond, examining some muslin-work, as if she loved it and stick out her tongue is too warm to hang for me he might like I had the devils own job to get up under my nose all the time like that Gardner said no more, her own intellect was probably deficient. And Rosamond—where is there not a letter on its way and scandals too the 3 queens and the coalmans bell that noisy bugger trying to hurt you I often wanted to touch mine with his big foot in the shape of my being jewess looking after my beauty sleep I thought well as can be done only once.

And he doesn't really care about, and seldom imagine how much those wishes cost others, and he in mourning thats 11 years ago my God after that hed kiss anything unnatural where we havent I atom of any person place or other would take the farms, and I will Yes. Ideal happiness of many young lives. Fred Vincy walked to Lowick. But as to the subtle offence she might be in love and being expected continually by some one who always do manage everybody. I laughed myself sick at him outside Westland row chapel where does their great intelligence come in Id like to begin about it people make its way and scandals too the few old rags I have the living at Lowick.

But Dorothea's effort was too much make it for a month yes and its so much to know that. The fact is, said Mr. Brooke had been asked to admire when I was one true thing he slept on the carpet have him I was living in Rehoboth terrace we stood staring at one another and then said seriously—There would be ample. Said Mrs. The fact is, I could see his face cleanshaven Frseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeefrong that train far away pianissimo eeeee one more chance Ill get a nice semitransparent morning gown that I never could get over the railings if anybody saw him that gets you on on the jealous side whenever he asked me to lift the orange petticoat I had a jolly warm bath and feel a day or two. Mary was copying the labels from a cabbage thats what he does it with ah horquilla disobliging old thing at all, was on the run again his huguenots or the lancers theyre grand or the lancers O the lancers O the lancers O the lancers theyre grand or the dishcover one coming down about us to cover our faces but she was a hope. Why, you know, said the Rector said. I've told you about that would attack a poor one, and this with the earrings I dont want to get well if his nose is not so ignorant what a Deceiver then he wanted to and she will come back Lord its just the worst old ones odd stockings that blackguardlooking fellow with the fine eyes peeling a switch attack me in Holles street one night man man tyrant as ever she could be known for Will's sake, since her friends seemed to be drawing money out of the world to be, did interfere with the gondolas and the boats with their eyes as darkly bright as loves own star arent those beautiful words as loves own star arent those beautiful words as loves own star arent those beautiful words as neatly as possible, and those often go with and come again like that you will consent to their finding holes in one's coat, said Sir James, who had fetched his own fault if I went up Windmill hill to the markets to see there was no help for it what has that French letter still in his heart was going to give up anything that I lost the job in Helys and I said I liked the way Mary might have taken it into him for a woman could have been mad especially Simon Dedalus too he said to Humphrey long ago the days like years not a rock: he ought to have one or two from on board I wore brought it on thick when hes there and kiss me in the 'Pioneer,Humphrey; and then we had even a spirited young man giving up the engagement under Mr. Vincy's answer consisted chiefly in a gate somewhere or picked up on a flying visit.

Cadwallader.

And the next room.

It is too flat or I dont like being alone in the most of his mouth O Lord I must run away, said Sir James, with placid hurry, my dear, said Mrs. Six weeks! I am so glad, and that she might be mistaken about Mr. Farebrother has left us alone in the time to May Goulding but then hed never turn or let him see my garters the new bed I couldnt put him into a volume of sermons by Mr. Tyke, he reopened the subject, seeing here a minute if Im let wait O Jesus wait yes hold on he was smarting under this disappointment he should hunt in pink, have a few men like that I what O well look at us with their 3 Rock mountain they think is so much that he will increase the practice.

You are very well to suggest these masculine examples to Mrs. Why should I sit here idle? You were as bad as a girl Hester we used to make the great God I got him excited he crushed all the big doll with all grades of poverty, and questions not soon to be slooching around down in his mind as a new valuation made from time to say the property away from us. Letty. Pray come too, Miss Garth. At the end I can answer him, I have of life up to his will, she locked up again the desks and drawers let him touch me inside my petticoat bodice all day youd never know consumption or leave me with his name on it properly he kneels down to sleep in some pub corner and her cheeks burn as they never used to go out to be mooching about for advertisements when he said wasnt it I suppose I divorced him Mrs Boylan my mother he used his mouth O Lord I cant wait till Monday frseeeeeeeefronnnng train somewhere whistling the strength those engines have in them like that Id rather die 20 times a day or two from on board I wore today thats all I said goodbye she had believed, whose exorbitant claims for himself had been talking to me.

There is no knowing to what he said he hadnt one he brought me he couldnt resist they excite myself sometimes its well the Surreys relieved them theyre always trying to make payment easy. Better let him try to walk in my hand is nice like that like Kitty OShea in Grantham street 1st thing I was a girl Hester we used to say yes till I see he did he know you think its the vegetables and cabbages and tomatoes and carrots and all kinds of splendid fruits all coming in without knocking first when I threw the penny to that idea of claim, and had to defend her husband found it out what they say they are the last year by giving lessons, carrying on hard study at the washstand dabbing and creaming only when it fell vacant after the ball was over like the dogs do it myself a young boy would like to find out whether he wishes he could give her the day I think of getting in a dish like Santa Lucia's, and put his tongue 7 miles up my clothes on me cocked sideways I wouldnt lee him he said he was attractive to a girl Hester we used to make everything comfortable about Rosamond's marriage; and he took out of the Harolds cross road with a married woman thats why I liked though he looked shattered the other the men with our 2 photographs in all the back when I saw him that very night. A bride who is much honored, is that they havent passion God help the men wont look at him first you sometimes love to wildly when you thought of him.

Do look at her face swelled up on a small income? They were in animated discussion on some blind excuse paying his compliments the Bushmills whisky talking of course hes right enough, really, Walter, you know. Not yet, I don't believe Lydgate has kept the handkerchief under my petticoats especially then still I made him pull out and have nothing more than her wogger he was always on for years covered with limesalts theyre all Buttons men down the collar of my skin I wanted to milk me into the pot measuring and mincing if I had a delicious glorious voice Phoebe dearest goodbye sweetheart sweetheart he always sang it not me when he used his mouth singing then he pestered me to see that you would insist on my plate those forks and fishslicers were hallmarked silver too I remember one time and let him go to that unconscious centre and poise of the house I couldnt think of it themselves theyd know what he should be under an operation or if I only wore it twice better lower this lamp and O that awful deepdown torrent O and the glorious sunsets and the necessary purchases went on in life now, I knew him by the way a body unless he likes now if thatll do him any side whats your programme today I mean that which takes in the next time yes because a woman like that if you dont believe you then a girl Hester we used to be squashed like that nowadays full up of each other up; and that she accepted their new relations willingly. But if Casaubon says nothing, papa, he would have been just after dinner all flushed and tossed on me yes now wouldnt that afflict you of course hed never find another woman like that with a smell of him. Family annoyances. What was Will Ladislaw.

It must be if they send up a sailor off the altar his long preach about womans higher functions about girls now riding the bicycle and wearing peak caps and the jessamine and geraniums and cactuses and Gibraltar as if it were not satisfactory. Now, are you bootmakers and publicans I beg your pardon coach I thought it as quietly and respectfully as if I can see his chest pink he wanted to examine a print curiously, as Arabella Hawley did.

Bretton's house situated in Lowick Gate, took notice when it fell vacant after the war that Pretoria and Ladysmith and Bloemfontein where Gardner lieut Stanley G 8th Bn 2nd East Lancs Rgt of enteric fever he was pissing standing out for the day of course, had hardly seen Ladislaw, who is much finer where it was Sir James's evident annoyance that most stirred Mr. Brooke, said the husband—more mildly, however, was silently occupied with conjectures, though? But perhaps you would wish to exert myself. What can I its a mercy, and to enter so much harm. But why should we defer it? If I knew him by any fantastic delays.

I loved. As for Rosamond, examining some muslin-work, said sarcastically—Eros has degenerated; he treated me as hes always imitating everybody I suppose I always make that mistake and newphew with 2 double yous in I hope you've made up a pack of lies to hide it not me.

He was not advantageous, a foreign emissary, and an oyster knife he went and had to stand for a penance I wonder do they go and ruin himself altogether the way Mary might have made their peace in the wet if I buy a pair of thighs than that of the Trumpet. I trust to the other young ones came up behind me and I none was he satisfied with me after that the new ones and make a change just to see how he got doctor Brady to give it up into me from the south circular when he said, peeping round to the doctor only it would not be hindered: they want a woman is so capable and sincerely Irish he is dos huevos estrellados senor Lord the cracked things come into the kitchen he might have compared her experience at that and the big doll with all that, said Mrs. Garth, that action was too much for those who preach new doctrine.

What?

Said Sir James, who at that moment thought of the voice either I could have wished that this was reasoning with an imperfect vision of sequences. Garth might do some work for me to say that she accepted their new relations willingly. Said Sir James. But it was easier to object than to hinder any one would have done to make the great apple-tree in the case of a woman of course he insisted hed go into an office or the door just as I dont know deceitful men all their 20 pockets arent enough for me it was meeting Josie Powell and the brutes of men, said Fred, said Dorothea, quite meekly. He is a sharp stroke or two.

Yes, I should think. Her world was standing for Parliament, said Lydgate, kissing her again. After collecting papers of business which she ought not to see or Ill try pairing the lady herself and see it all, a century has passed away: '—they're in the paper as if she was clearly conscious of another change which also made her like me to Lowick. Said to him, and do a blessed thing in them Mrs Ramsbottom or some kind of flowers are those they invented like the soup splashing about taking spoonfuls of it themselves theyd know what to make of me like the dickens they call it a sort of pinching hard to imagine what sort of thing—these men never understand what is good satire. It's a cruel thing for a month yes and those often go with a will, writing and everything, besides plate and glass. The world about it in the dark theyre always dreaming about with his shortsighted eyes on my feet going out to be prettier than memory could represent her to be more in love with him. Garth, and general futility. I always think of it altogether and me, he did suppose our rooms at the hustings. Rosamond hesitated, and had to be married soon.

I fear you never know the time Id have to go up next term and pass your examination. His replies were not a horse or an engagement which had been chiefly urged by his mother's chair, and was really an argument for not deferring the marriage too long for my taste your blouse is open too low she says to me about the Vicar, to inquire thoroughly into Lydgate's circumstances, declare his own character, and keeps his farms has a thing long into my bedroom so I would empty a pot of leeches upon him,—and this was a discipline for Fred to be embraced by one in Middlemarch; and then the beautiful country with the butterflies. They always happen to have buried him in Drimmies I was a marriage on with her I wouldnt let him do it in the crush in the crib at Inchicore in the D B C Dame street finder return to Mrs. Anyhow, it's not a particle of love in his way it takes a long time.

—And this little old maid.

Not surprised that Mary could no longer before her to Skerrys academy where shed have to suffer Im sure he was awfully put out of him. Why, yes, said Sir James was shy, even with indignation against him, and lunch lingering in the execution of necessary business. Why, you see something was telling me pull the chain then to flush it nice cool pins and needles still theres something I want to keep that up and Ill take those eggs beaten up with a shock of repulsion from her—empty of personal words for her that she must have eaten a whole sheep after whats the idea making us like that theyre not afraid going about that some day not now and then he wanted to examine all my life felt anyone had one the size of that in real life without some old Aristocrat or whatever they like from anything at all with their fever if he was the 7th card after that its some little bitch hes got in with her father; and Lovegood is hardly up to that till the next morning in letting Rosamond know what I never had so much mind Id just go to Lowick.

Said it was so expressive will I what O patience above its pouring out of the different ways in which even a spirited young man giving up the tickets and swearing blazes because he used to be petted so I advise you to make her look young no matter by who so long as to her inexperienced mind that he had to return to Mrs.

I am not aware that Mary should be able to speak so slightingly of a concert so cold never embracing me except sometimes when he sat down by her inclination to laugh or cry were such a criticiser with his two old maids of sisters when I unbuttoned him and he readily understood that she might wish to marry on? Hawley's rather rough: he is hampered in reconciling these tastes with his for a penance I wonder could I get up under my nose all the pleasure I could easily have slipped a couple of pounds a few months after a row on youd vomit a better face there was a child whether she had a fine salty taste yes because theres a wonderful feeling there so tender all the horses toenails first like he got on his hands at the Hospital: a man like that in his shirt to see Mr. Farebrother. You have only to look for 10000 pounds for a month or two from on board I wore today thats all they want everything in their poetry laughed at I S than theyll all know at 50 they dont believe you then I asked him I had a wretched lymphatic wife who made a thoroughly good match. Eh? They always happen to have come without study or other inconvenience, purely by the hand, I am sure you did everything, with his muddy boots on when the infant king of the sudden revelation that another had thought of her intended son-in-law who has distressed his tenants for arrears as little of his wishes. It saved time to time, and would never interfere with the stone for my register even transposed and he was in fits of laughing with the wrong not being in the W C too because how could she do besides theyre not brutes enough to end in mere smoke.

Sir James. Oh, confound it, said the Rector, taking up the stairs I loved looking down at Lahore who knows is there anything the matter. But it was for me he gave me the things into her hands sneezing and farting into the wrong side of the house so you cant fool a lover after me telling him on till he comes out and going to be always chained up theyre not all like that and that Ruby and Fair Tyrants he brought me about the place hotter than it is as for her; she broke off the ship and old captain Groves and father waiting all the time of double solitude.

She was wishing it were possible to restore the times of primitive zeal, and Parliament going to Howth Id like a big brute like that Indian god he took me to do it again slobbering after washing every bit of a Spanish nobleman named Don Miguel de la Flora and he knows the meaning of the things into her hands sneezing and farting into the kitchen I was almost planning to run the chance of being able to make Lydgate's innocent introduction of Ladislaw painful to Mary was accustomed to think Celia wiser than herself, and I don't know what it must be given up. If you were pulling another. You know every one in the porkbutchers is a reason for inaction, namely, that I lost the leads out of bounds wanting to marry Mr. Ladislaw; but then what am I ever go there to be thankful for our mangy cup of tea after was quite good with the heat there before the levanter came on black as night and the inside I often wanted to put it in with somewhere or picked up on a thread with the ironmould mark the stupid old bundle burned on them I had to describe a man or pretending to be in the D B C with Poldy laughing and trying to listen I was afraid it might hurt her. He has got a pound a week or so it was a lovely fellow in khaki and just the worst to the whatyoucallit everything was whatyoucallit moustache had he he said to Sir Godwin Lydgate's, which was not going to the Middlemarchers. I liked him for that it was too well off yes O wait now sonny my turn is coming Ill be quite gay and friendly over it instead of the banks there on purpose! Well, my dear! If I knew, would be of a promise to erect a tomb with his grog on the beginning of medical practice and the jessamine and geraniums and cactuses and Gibraltar as a top the moment the face and neck painfully. I will call goose and gander: especially on the black water and is quite changed they all with all that, Mr. Brooke, taking up notions that had the devils gap steps well small blame to me the majority of them only thats what gives the women the moustaches Im sure hed have heard me on copied from some fellow or other trying to take her hand up to him for one thing he really likes me I heard burglars in the village, and he tired me out a few brains not like.

Exactly, said the Rector.

Anyhow, it's not a modus in Tipton.

But let us have a reason for inaction, namely, that the one like a rose I didnt call him Hugh the ignoramus that doesnt know what it is abominable, and then wed see what you liked lie there for or He wouldnt have him sitting up like a big infant I had to take in lodgers off the shelves into it. Then again she was near seventy always goodhumoured well now, uncle; I see something was telling me all the Doyles said he lost the job in Helys and I say.

Mr. Casaubon had left the property was all thinking of so many years to know youre a virgin for them not long remain passive where action had been on the windowsill catch him leaving the gas on all night squandering money and getting drunker and drunker couldnt they drink water then he wanted to pick him up to one side the Queens own they were a wheelbarrow theyd die down dead off their feet if ever he caressed them outside they love doing that its some little bitch hes got in with those medicals leading him on.

Ladislaw will take it you want isnt there sometimes by the bullneck in his gentlest tone, Mr. Brooke, shuffling round and shaking hands. And he will be quiet on my neck he had been remarking on baby's robes. Celia.

Mrs Stanhope sent me from behind the way the world that I dont know what he does at it with his handkerchief. By-and-by.

Fred, she would be injuring him by the arrival of the day I was badtempered too because how was it where you sit down in the transcendent evening light: is there a squad of them want you to tell me who are you sure O yes I pulled him off into my head then Ill tell him I feel some wind in me nice invention too by the answers when hes like the sentry had he he said was, I should think he made me hungry to look over everything—to see why am I to do except Brownie, the Vicar. The iron had not entered into every one's feelings, and you made a codicil to his room with some cold veal and ham mixed sandwiches there are a few times to learn the way Mary might have been looking into a dust-heap on purpose that we went over middle hill round by Coadys lane will give no money to spare—hardly enough to go beyond this salutary general doctrine, and he goes and gives him a few first-rate pocket-handkerchiefs; but that might have met somebody on a small income? He says Bulstrode the banker, is his son. I don't like to see why am I with nothing but my relations with him its much better for them saying theres no danger besides hed be off his hat and stick and rose quickly. I think a few breathing exercises I wonder was he was watching me whenever he set out at a tenant's barn-door or make his house look a little while with my finger dipped out of it too marked the first man going the roads only for the rain I saw him following me along the Calle las Siete Revueltas and Pisimbo and Mrs Rubio brought it on me thats better I used to use; and though, since it would not be his Mr. Brooke's fault if Dorothea insisted on looking into everything.

But now her judgment whispered was vain for all by the favor of providence in the bed too with our 4 sticks of furniture—carpeting and everything but their own wishes, and machine-breaking everywhere, and general futility. That's a showy sort of Byronic hero—an illiterate fellow, you never know consumption or leave me with his name? I could find out a fine son like that in him yes and his mother pleaded for him has he not done more than any other way like dabbling on a visiting card or practising for the name I dont know who was the same in case of twins theyre supposed to be pretending to help a tenant to buy in the intricacies of the lashes? No, I knew it would not that its some little bitch or other and his heart had gone out to her head and looked at the washstand dabbing and creaming only when it came on to the poll.

Mary had been so bad as now with Milly nobody would believe cutting her words as neatly as possible how he is what spoils him I loved dancing about in all the old walks and among the rhododendrons on Howth head in the kitchen I was thinking of me talking about politics they know youve no man would look at her schoolfellow Miss Willoughby's. Exactly, said Miss Winifred, in which memory would not long remain passive where action had been released.

It glanced through her mind. You are sure to marry Mr. Ladislaw, and he covered it up. He has more spunk in him because I used to be surprised, I am standing in his tea off flypaper wasnt it I suppose theyre all right for tonight now the lumpy old jingly bed always reminds me of course the man never even rendered down the gallery said O much about as my backside anything in the W C too because how was it not to squander every penny piece he earns down their gullets and looks after his company manners making it so clean and white he looks with his shortsighted eyes on my bottom when was it not? I always used to be put in his nature slapping us behind like that he had a kind of a few times he forgot that. Well, he was only do it on the old lady's death, and willow-pattern. We have had him two or three times to learn not like to begin about it why cant we all know the time as if she deferred her introduction to the other clergymen's neckcloths, because it seemed to light up all my compriments I suppose he was always breaking or tearing something in the grey tweed suit and his soul, but wished that Mr. Ladislaw, said Sir James Chettam could not possibly ever think of it and father waiting all the mud. Lydgate has kept the highest company and been everywhere, and the new bed I couldnt keep it when was that 93 the canal was frozen yes it was I too heavy on me yes and drew him down to sleep in the face lotion I finished the last letter from O Mrs Dwenn now what possessed her to Skerrys academy where shed have to peep out through the blind like the soup splashing about taking spoonfuls of it hes a bit of seedcake out of her suggesting me to find everybody, you can go and look her square in the cheeks of my face and everything you were yes I can see its not true and that Mary should be so with me one time and let you enjoy anything naturally then might he as a sheet frightened out of a baronet's must have been a bit when I put out first for fear hed die of the basket anything at all, said the Rector, don't let us take a direction that would at least one quarter of the tails with no cut in it I hope my breath was sweet after those kissing comfits easy God I wouldnt lower myself to spy on them hes certainly well off I know I am standing in his conscience because of them pretending to help a tenant to buy underclothes then if he wants and he was speaking to me and that for any further delay in the grey tweed suit and his shoulders his finger up for you I had something to sigh for a couple of the room upstairs empty and Millys bed in any case if its a bother having to lie down for them all sides asking me had I could see him and left a stink on you faded all that comes from his chance-gotten money.

Cadwallader, nodding. What I mean no no Fridays an unlucky man and he made me hungry to look across see her aunt if you please common robbery so it is so dreadful—there's no pleasure in thinking of him there was some rage in his conscience because of the Grange, and slightly meditative; in the bottom of her worsted, knitting her brow at it with or knew how to manage your papa says he will be brought round in time, said Mrs. A large tear which had begun to see her combing it as if it were possible to restore the times of primitive zeal, and whom you set up housekeeping, he's mistaken, that's a blessing, said Dorothea, breaking in impetuously. Besides, your father will come home her widows weeds wont improve her appearance ugly as she chose—always an advantage when one has run into one's self, said the Rector, laughingly, that she must wait and think anew. Lydgate's tendency was not going to Todd and Bums as I dont like books with a young man must sometimes walk for want of her husband about Will Ladislaw's moral claim on the property which was shown to him for that it is abominable, and ready to stick her knife in you I said yes I will Yes.

Mr. Farebrother came in and out all the women are the last concert I sang Maritana with him half awake without a hard bolster its well for Fred hardly less sharp than his disappointment about Fred, reddening instantaneously. I saw Farebrother yesterday—he's Whiggish himself, hoists Brougham and Useful Knowledge; that's the worst old ones she could cloth and stuff and yards of it between them instead of being extravagant. He has paid his usual visit, though that wicked man has deceived him. Bulstrode, the day old frostyface Goodwin called about the incarnation he never can explain a thing he slept on the verge of speaking as one of those Sinner Fein or the voice so there was a bit grown in the summer scents of the mud.

We have had him two or three times to dine at the table in there for but I suppose he used to be all shot or the dew theres no God I remember after when we walk forth happily among them in the world the mists began I hate people that have to wear whoever invented them expecting you to listen theres real beauty and of pushing his hair up. Yes, I think he made up your mind now to turn out well yet, I confess that's what I badly want or a captain or admiral its nearly 20 years if I could without too openly they were fine all silver in the mean time not a letter sometimes twice a day older than her original fortune which had been slow and hesitating, oppressed in the end I can feel his mouth bigger I suppose that was done out of Dorothea's nature: she does she knows where, but he has got that way of paring and clipping at expenses.

Of course I care for his dinner he told father he was only do it to papa? The living, suffering man was no help for it if anyone was passing so I would too and Mina Purefoys husband give us a farthing all for masses for herself take that thats alright the one nature gave wasnt enough for me to say the property which was probably only the retrospect of painful subjection to a gentlemans proposal affirmatively my goodness theres nothing else its all the same time. You should go and marry a poor case that those that have a hospital where everything is given to him when he sat down by her and her lot of sparrowfarts skitting around talking about Spinoza and his son.

But you called him wogger wd give anything—with this disappointment about Fred, said Mrs. Certainly Fred's tailoring suggested the advantages of an adverse resolve; in fact, she would have called an ordinary way, wishing that he had a woman as soon as she was undergoing a metamorphosis in which the parson doesn't cut the principal figure.

Sir James, who held it the two Dedaluses and Fanny MCoys husband white head of hair on her own intellect was probably only the usual kissing my bottom was to hide it planning it Hynes kept me who the german Emperor is it yes I said to Humphrey long ago not those long crossed letters Atty Dillon used to use it. She did not once occur to Fred than the bulls ear these clothes we have to be there the poplars and they dying and why why because theyre afraid of doing what his daughter would not like Bartell Darcy sweet tart goodbye of course hes mad on the indifferent when they meddled; but he was in bed with a young man giving up the newspaper.

He might as well he wont get or its some woman in the next room or perhaps the sweety kind of a few times for the want of a romantic comedy.

What was Will Ladislaw. The part Mr. Vincy was very fond of me in the summer sky and the castanets and the jessamine and geraniums and cactuses and Gibraltar as if it was meeting Josie Powell and the brutes of men, about disagreeable subjects; and this, Mary said to him anyhow either she or me leaves the house. There would be, since her friends seemed to be back in her behind in black L Boom and Tom Kernan that drunken little barrelly man that bit his tongue is too heavy sitting on this affair they ought to be admired like a couple dropped out of them felt that the sandfrog shower from Africa and that she had been ugly and fat as men at forty sometimes are. But it was going to be some truth in it so much the night for him put it past him like other women do I so damned nervous about that would attack a poor man and he is now so as to be looked at myself 4 and 5 times a day or two at a woman wants to be writing up interests he doesn't deserve it, Harriet! The sooner the engagement's off, said the Rector.

Cadwallader seemed like a God or something like a fishwoman when I had up in me nice invention too by the hand, I am sure he was a little less like an opal or pearl still it must be real love if a belief flattered her vanity she felt to her one evening, in an apologetic tone, throwing a light shawl over her, and she saw the Spanish girls he didnt stay Im sure itll be more alive to the worst I know, should be held superior—was glad, of course compared with their high heads rocking and the figtrees in the morning with captain Rubios that was it where you sit down in the moustachecup she gave him that gets you on on the black water and is quite changed they all do they ask us to see if the world was in the home and beauty when I saw him and hear him preach. Garth has invented a new form, that she might give to the people passing they all do they ask us to marry the man with his knife or theyd have taken the house I suppose hed like my nice cream too I wish he had been a bit married just like to find out was he excited me of another landlord who has handsomer, better children than ours? Mamma had a graceful way even of looking warm and of pushing his hair up at I S than theyll all know at 50 they dont believe me feel my belly is a great friend of ours; and what is he too young then writing every morning to look out of the house that medical in Holles street the nurse was after when I was going up-stairs to take off my glove slowly watching him he could, he added, abruptly, You know every one in the train by tipping the guard well O I suppose 111 only have to be mooching about for advertisements when he stood up and whats this else how to row if anyone asked could he ride the steeplechase for the world the mists began I hate those eels cod yes Ill get a wink of sleep it wouldnt have him asking wheres last Januarys paper and trying to get his lordship his breakfast in bed in the museum in Kildare street all yellow in a coral-heap on purpose that we could accept any exchange for it.

I would not like.

I meet ah yes I would because I saw Farebrother yesterday—he's Whiggish himself, and he took me to kiss my bottom I wonder is it tell me of old Mrs Fleming and drove out to her, and he says your soul you have taken it into me Ive a mind to tell up in me somewhere because they know youve no man would look at her twice I had a wretched lymphatic wife who made a mummy will I what O well I suppose he scratched himself in it I suppose well its not good of all kinds of splendid fruits all coming in half the rotten eggs would mean hatred of your committee-man.

He is dos huevos estrellados senor Lord the cracked things come into my aunt Mary has a thing like that dirty bitch in that Spanish photo he has an idea for him if you please that might be the highest company and been everywhere, and if a man who does that suit me yes take that now for your father. Yes, to make me blush why should you dislike clergymen? You know Mr. Tyke at the Gaiety for Beerbohm Tree in Trilby the last time I saw him slip it into him and I went through with Milly enough for that how much is that they are beginning to be written up with it I suppose theyre all mad to get the smell of a man was no time to do this year, with an ill-satisfied conscience. What has he no manners nor no refinement nor no refinement nor no nothing in his vestments and the water rolling all over his old lottery tickets that was the 8th then I wouldnt put it past him like he does and then the City Arms hotel was there spying around as usual. If I were Brooke, with a picture naked to some poor child but I was too public I was playing with them it would not be so with me, Mrs. How can you have men on your nerves nothing kills me altogether only he thinks Im finished out and 2 red 8s for new garments look at me I looked a bit putting on the hawthorn bough he was there sending me back over and over again and her gabby talk about him l or 2 questions Ill know by Millys when she was might have taken up such an idea for him she used to be got ready—can it not me.

What I care two straws now who he has not said so yet here you are like it well see then let him lick me in the butchers and had found it out in front of the window all the time even that watch he gave me never seems to go to Lowick, to be admired like a hatrack no wonder they hide it planning it Hynes kept me who did not speak for a woman has she fleas shes as bad as ever she could see down in the ladies lavatory D B C Dame street finder return to Mrs Marion Bloom and I can see what attention only of course he saw me however standing at the Grange!

I liked though he was, I am longing for Caleb to come and tell Chettam that it is too warm for him what that meant I hate bandaging and dosing when he cut his clothes have and losing it on thick when hes like the sentry in front of the bed father was the evening coming along Kenilworth square he kissed me six or seven times didnt I cry yes I know by Millys when she wanted to kiss her at the other room he could easy have slept in there on purpose that we could go at the same 2 lumps of lard before ever Id do that afterwards, and her little man—you have men on your person my child on the innate submissiveness of the way thats why I was afraid it might be the better. But it's pleasant to find out if there is anything uncomfortable for you.

There is no argument that a woman that came along I suppose hes a bit too high for my register even transposed and he had been passing in her chair, and thought no more of the real father what did he want to buy underclothes then if anything goes wrong in their proper place pulling off his complexion and the radiance seemed to be squashed like that myself what we wish. And in the world only for the gold cup hed say or do something to do these things yet, I can help it a wider range than that of the way his father made his money over selling the meat and the smell of those books he brings me the present terms. Said Mrs. But the centre of interest was changed for all by the cut his clothes have and losing it on too damn it damn it and doesnt talk I gave Gardner going to do that act of justice? I only could remember the I half of those painted women off him like he got me on the floor with the cherries with it and was making himself dreadfully disagreeable, Letty thought, be apparent to him as can be; everybody is being able to open the door for me he couldnt get anyone to drink God spare his spit for fear you never know consumption or leave me with a candle and a mother how could they where would they all with all the bits of paper in his peevish warehouse humor. And in the execution of necessary business.

'—They're in the opposite house that medical in Holles street squeezed and squashed into them and wouldnt eat any breakfast or speak a word wanting to check unintended consequences—I had it inside my petticoat began to arrange what he likes none at all hours answer the door for a postcard U p up O sweetheart May wouldnt a thing of beauty and of joy for ever something he did to me the rosary Rosales y OReilly in the great, imminent discovery.

Trieste-Zurich-Paris 1914—1921

Santa Barbara 2015—2018

#Ulysses (novel)#James Joyce #1922 #automatically generated text #Patrick Mooney #Penelope #George Eliot #Victorian novels #British novelists #Bildungsromaener #didactic literature #Marian Evans #19th century #Middlemarch (novel)

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gta-5-cheats · 7 years ago

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Trump audio transcript: ‘I’m looking forward to’ speaking with Mueller

New Post has been published on http://secondcovers.com/trump-audio-transcript-im-looking-forward-to-speaking-with-mueller/

Trump audio transcript: ‘I’m looking forward to’ speaking with Mueller

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President Trump told reporters on Jan. 24 that he is “looking forward” to speaking to special counsel Robert S. Mueller III. Trump said there was “no collusion” between his presidential campaign and Russia. (David Nakamura/The Washington Post)

President Trump told reporters Wednesday he is “looking forward” to to special counsel Robert S. Mueller III. Here is the full transcript of the interview.

REPORTER: Are you going to talk to Mueller?

TRUMP: I’m looking forward to it, actually.

REPORTER: Do you have a date set? Do you have a date set, Mr. President?

TRUMP: There’s been no collusion whatsoever. There’s no obstruction whatsoever. And I’m looking forward to it. I do worry when I look at all of the things that you people don’t report about, with what’s happening. If you take a look at, you know, the five months’ worth of missing texts — that’s a lot of missing texts. And as I said yesterday, that’s prime time.

So you do sort of look at that and say, “What’s going on?” You do look at certain texts where they talk about insurance policies or insurance where they say the kinds of things they’re saying, you gotta be concerned. But I would love to do that, and I’d like to do it as soon as possible.

REPORTER: When will you do it, Mr. President? Do you have a date set?

TRUMP: So here’s the story…

REPORTER: Do you have a date set, Mr. President?

TRUMP: I don’t know, no. I guess you’re talking about two or three weeks, but I would love to do it.

REPORTER: In person?

TRUMP: You know, again, it’s — I have to say — subject to my lawyers and all of that — but I would love to do it.

REPORTER: Would you do it under oath, Mr. President?

TRUMP: You mean like Hillary [Clinton] did it under — who said that?

REPORTER: I said that.

TRUMP: Oh.

REPORTER: Would you do it under oath?

TRUMP: Oh you said it. You did say it. You say a lot. Did Hillary do it under oath?

REPORTER: I have no idea, but I’m not asking about —

TRUMP: I think you have an idea. Don’t you have an idea?

REPORTERS: [CROSSTALK]

TRUMP: Wait, wait, wait. Do you not have an idea? Do you really not have an idea? I’ll give you an idea. She didn’t do it under oath. But I would do it under oath. Listen, but I would do it. And you know she didn’t do it under oath, right?

REPORTER: She would do it under oath.

TRUMP: If you didn’t know about Hillary, then you’re not much of a reporter.

REPORTER: Mr. President, you are going to do it under oath?

REPORTER: To reach a higher standard, you would do it under oath?

TRUMP: Oh, I would do it under oath.

REPORTER: You would?

TRUMP: Absolutely.

REPORTER: Do you trust the FBI?

TRUMP: Well, what am I going to say? I am very disturbed, as is the general, as is everybody else that is intelligent. When you look at — five months? This is the late great [President Richard Nixon’s secretary] Rose Mary Woods, right? [Inaudible] This is a large-scale version of this. That was 18 minutes, this is five months. They say it’s 50,000 texts and it’s prime time. That’s disturbing.

REPORTER: Should [FBI Deputy Director Andrew] McCabe go? Should McCabe go, Mr. President?

TRUMP: Well, McCabe got more than $500,000 from essentially Hillary Clinton. And is he investigating Hillary Clinton?

REPORTER: So should he go?

TRUMP: Do you remember, did anybody hear many of my speeches when I talked about McCabe? He was the star of my speech. This isn’t now. And I said a man who was more or less in charge of her — the wife got $500,000 from [Virginia Gov.] Terry [McAuliffe]. Now Terry is Hillary. And, yeah, I mean —

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REPORTER: Do you regret having him as your acting FBI director, then?

TRUMP: You know what, I keep out of it. You’d find that hard to believe. I keep out of it. That’s the way it fell. He’s been there. It’s one of those things. But he was the star of many of my speeches. Because he got from $500,000 to $700,000, whatever the number was. Got that money for the wife. And, you know, in Virginia—

REPORTER: Did you ask him who he voted for?

TRUMP: It’s very interesting.

REPORTER: [CROSSTALK]

TRUMP: Wait. In Virginia, you don’t have to spend the money. So I never checked as to whether or not they spent the money on the campaign. How much of the money did he spend on the campaign, do you know — she — how much was it?

REPORTER: [CROSSTALK]

TRUMP: Wait, how much of the money was spent?

REPORTER: Did you ask who he voted for?

TRUMP: You know.

REPORTER: Did you ask McCabe who he voted for? Did you ask him that?

TRUMP: I don’t think so.

REPORTER: You don’t think you did?

TRUMP: No, I don’t think I did.

REPORTER: You did not?

REPORTER: Is it possible you did?

TRUMP: I don’t know what’s the big deal with that. Because I would ask you, “Who did you vote for?”

[LAUGHTER]

TRUMP: I don’t think that’s a big deal. But I don’t remember that. I saw that this morning. I don’t remember asking him that question.

REPORTER: Is it possible you did? Is it a possibility?

TRUMP: I don’t remember asking him the question. I think it’s also a very unimportant question, but I don’t remember asking him that.

[CROSSTALK]

TRUMP: Hey, chief, would you do me a favor? When we come back, when we come back, I want you to have a deal, OK? See if you could have a deal.

[CROSSTALK]

REPORTER: Thank you, Mr. President.

REPORTER: We can use all the audio?

TRUMP: Nice — and, not — you don’t repeat, and this and that, just one nice piece. OK?

REPORTER: One more quick one. Do you believe Robert Mueller will be fair to you?

TRUMP: I only repeat for the purposes of making sure you understand.

REPORTER: One more quick one — do you think Robert Mueller will be fair to you in this larger investigation?

TRUMP: We’re going to find out.

REPORTER: Are you concerned about it?

TRUMP: Because here’s what we’ll say, and everybody says: No collusion. There’s no collusion. Now they’re saying, “Oh, well, ‘Did he fight back? Did he fight back?’ You fight back, ‘Oh, it’s obstruction.’ So, here’s the thing: I hope so.

REPORTER: How do you define collusion? Maggie asked this earlier during the briefing to Sarah —

TRUMP: You’re going to define it for me, OK? But I can tell you, there’s no collusion. I couldn’t have cared less about Russians having to do with my campaign. The fact is — you people won’t say this, but I’ll say it: I was a much better candidate than her. You always say she was a bad candidate. You never say I was a good candidate. I was one of the greatest candidates. Nobody else would have beaten the Clinton machine, as crooked as it was. But I was a great candidate. Someday you’re going to say that. Goodbye, everybody.

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musical-miranda · 8 years ago

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The Mysterious Miranda (Chapter 10) (No Smut)

CLICK HERE FOR THE VERSION WITH SMUT

pairing: lin manuel miranda x reader, daveed diggs x reader

warnings: cheating, lil bit of angst, 1920s slang(??), lots of fluff

words: 5560 (im so sorry for so many reasons yall)

a/n: Alternatively titled: Poor Anthony™

If you want to be tagged in the next parts, just shoot me an ask! I absolutely love to hear feedback from anybody and everybody, I can’t begin to express how much it means to me.

tags: @isis278 @21phantasticromances @dvddggs @l-nmanuel @bluesnowyangel @hamrevolution @hell-yes-puns-and-ships @accidentally-impeccable @paintingpetrichors